#yes it is ivan the terrible and his son
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obi-wan and his pruny boy
#obi-wan nomnom that bitch#yes it is ivan the terrible and his son#a new hope ended like this trust me#obikin#obikin fanart#obi wan kenobi#anakin skywalker#vaderkin#darth vader#i do believe though vader should be the one holding obi-wan#idk i am an obi-wan evangelist#all his wrongdoings while parenting anakin were alluring so they're all pardoned#made this for my tumblr header so no thoughts were used while doing this#except for that theseus father quote in midsummer's night dream#church indulgences for sale
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Captain Crozier and his Second
#francis crozier#james fitzjames#the terror#fitzier#the terror fanart#the terror amc#amc the terror#my drawings#thinking about that ‘all these people are dying not where the Should be dying’ quote#yes this is based off that Ivan the terrible and his son Ivan picture#‘why?’ l’appel du vide. that’s why#not entirely sure if happy with this or not yet#but i may as well just post it now anyway#judging by my previous track record the odds are very good that if i don’t post it now i never will#and it’ll just rot in my WIP folder forever more#so here it is#enjoy#‘his second in command? his second James?’ that dear reader i leave up to you to decide
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<-She is thinking about Paintings
#yes I'm thinking about Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan on 16 November 1581 again#and a couple others like 'Kashchey the Immortal' by Viktor Vasnetsov and 'Koshchey the Deathless' by Ivan Bilibin#...I guess I'm specifically thinking about Russian paintings this morning. anyway see you in a couple hours maybe
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Heyy!! I don’t know if you still do Chrollo fics , but if you’re doing recommendations/commissions , can you make something like where the readers like “do you think you’ll kill for me one day?” and he’s like “yes. of course I will my darling” ?? It’s based off a sound I heard somewhere .. I think the song is called “I want it all” by Lana del ray. Thank you!! 🫶
damn he really would say that huh?
Bad Habit.
Yan Chrollo x F Reader.
Synopsis: “Where there is carnage, there is beauty.”
Warnings: Yandere themes, unhealthy relationships, general anxiety and uneasiness, references to disturbing works of art (Saturn Devouring His Son, The Nightmare, Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan), manipulation, and talks of violence.
Word Count: 900.
*~*~*~*
There are as many things people can see as beautiful as there are shades of light shining through a prism.
Spectrums are quite common along with comparison and placement. It varies greatly from person to person, their preferences and their life experiences and their joys, and their fears.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, yes, but the eye of the beholder is also the window to their soul, to their psychological responses and traumas and memories of a past that would rather either be forgotten or worshiped. Every soul is different, and there is beauty in that. So, why do you find the heart and soul of Chrollo Lucilfer, whom many would call beautiful if they never knew him for what he truly is, so, so simply lovely? It does not have to do with his mannerisms or his confidence or his knowledge of virtually everything in this world, you concluded one day, after receiving yet another call from him, with him, as always, asking general questions like if you miss him and such. It is because he is the only thing I can cling to that will stay here, with me.
You cling onto him like a lost puppy, yearning for any sort of affection they can get no matter the cost. You did that when he first transported you from one place to another with hardly regarding any words from you on the matter. You do that now, in this art museum, full of unfamiliar faces and unfamiliar artwork and unfamiliar architecture. You missed home, back then. You still do now, and Chrollo still does not care one bit.
His hand is like a cuff, his arm like a chain, as he walks with you from one room to the next. But, still, it is the only thing that keeps you from falling apart.
So, like a sort of dance, you two move in sync. It is up to Chrollo as to if or when you will stop. It is never up to you, after all.
Does Chrollo enhance the horrific allure of these paintings, or does he once again bring all the attention to himself?
*~*~*~*
“Mythology often comes from our own woes.” He says, pointing upward, slowly, to Cronos’s eyes, which are bloodshot and large and dark. “A popular theory was that Goya was representing an oppressive government through Kronos, and the son that was prophesized to kill him as an adult represented the people who had started to revolt. But others don’t see it that way, oddly enough.”
You don’t respond, you simply look at the beheaded infant, which looks so soft and so rotten at the same time, with blood and deskinned chewed flesh running down his neck. He fits into his father’s hands perfectly, like he was made to be eaten.
*~*~*~*
“While most incubi are written and drawn as physically attractive creatures, this one in particular looks more akin to a gargoyle than that of a man.” He hums, and you can feel his hand wrap more tightly around yours. Not so much in a strangling, hurtful way, but rather just in a sort of reminderful way. “Maybe Fuseli was trying to make sure that the point of what the incubus really is is sent across to the viewers?”
With not a single word coming out of your mouth, a sure sign that you are zoning out his words, he squeezes a bit tighter to get your attention back where he wants it to be.
“What do you think, beloved?”
Once again, instead of answering, you choose to remain silent and focus your attention on other things. So, you look around. To the floor. To your high heels. Everything else, anything else. Only silence remains for a few more moments, but when the silence is not enjoyed any longer with another increase in his grip, you decide to answer before you get yourself into trouble.
“...I… I think that maybe it deals with sleep paralysis.”
Chrollo widens his eyes and smirks, and from those actions alone you know you have created a believable lie and concept that is sure to be amusing to him.
You’re forgiven.
*~*~*~*
“Historians say that the son’s death was the point of no return for Ivan.” A cradling of the arms and a Cat’s Cradle are the same; they both trap those within them.
Eyes are still eyes, whether they are real or not. Ivan the Terrible’s show a thousand tragedies and a thousand other faces his destiny could have worn, if he pushed the other one aside, if he had the strength to.
“Just like how Ivan was his son’s undoing, his son was also his.”
*~*~*~*
“...Would you ever kill for me?”
Violence is often not the only path Chrollo can choose to take. His words can be another, albeit that road will be much longer, and less smooth.
Who knows what he will choose when the hour of the heist comes to fruition when the art can finally be grasped and never let go of?
Which path do you prefer?
Which path does he prefer?
Do you prefer to be threatened with sweet honey that sticks to your skin or is so hot that it burns it?
“Of course, my dear.”
What you find grotesque, like the way the topic of violence is spoken so naturally from you and him, Chrollo always seems to find beautiful, like the way your moving lips are so lush.
…
Paintings are often just a reflection of how the world is, after all.
#aya abstractions#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere hunter x hunter#yandere hxh#yandere chrollo#yandere chrollo x reader#chrollo x reader#yandere chrollo lucilfer x reader#yandere chrollo lucilfer#yandere hunter x hunter x reader#yandere hxh x reader#200 followers event
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It hurts every time he chooses to betray me.
(reblogs > likes, closeups & version w/o filters under the cut)
in case you were wondering, yes, this is very much inspired by THE 'Ivan the terrible and his son Ivan' painting! i am a bit of an art nerd & there is something about the embrace depicted in the piece that just Gets me, y'know? it is a very nice work of art & also it was pratically virtually impossible for me not to draw it as belos & hunter. :P
#the owl house#TOH spoilers#emperor belos#philip wittebane#caleb wittebane#grimwalker TOH#hunter TOH#blood tw#head trauma tw#personal tags:#my art#TOHposting#wittebaneisms#blood of my blood ─ flesh of my flesh#cain vs. abel#i keep thinking of the first grimwalker & how terrifying it must've been for philip to relive what had happened with caleb#do you think he felt any regret? any fear? did he pray for their souls like he must've prayed for caleb's?#etc. etc. don't leave me alone with my thoughts because i will do something bad w/ them
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*slides in* Hi! First of all: I love your art forever and ever it is so beautiful and gorgeous to me. It's my favourite ever. Also, inspired by your recent posts of Fel carrying Osiris, I was thinking... How about drawing a pietà scene with them? Or maybe with Red and Fel, that would be more thematically correct for a pietà.
ALSO also: I remember quite a while ago, you posted drawing of our favourite Hunters as hunters from Bloodborne (and what amazing pictures they are!!! I drooled over them for hours I swear) and you wondered in the tags how Exos would even work in a setting like that? I forget your exact wording but whatever. I present to you: the concept of steampunk Exos! Steam powered, even. Bloodborne is seemingly based on Victorian England, so it could work! Possibly. Maybe. If they can do weird blood magic they can do steampunk Exos :)
Anyway! Thank you for continuing to show us your beautiful art and I hope you have a nice day 💖
Aah, thank you!! 🥺💙
Well that's an interesting idea, I'm writing it odwn! I sometimes think about doing homages of some artworks, but I always feel like... it's too much responsibility maybe?.. I feel like I have to make it look absolutely flawless and that's utterly impossible, so I'm scared to even try and mostly just rotate all the ideas in my head, lol. For example, with Red and Fel I was thinking about redrawing Repin's "Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan", since it's. well, pretty much exactly what happened akjsdhfkj (It's an extremely famous painting in Russia, portraying tsar Ivan the Terrible, who accidentally killed his own son in a fit of anger and got absolutely devastated once he realized what he's done. Tbh it's so well-fitting that I've always wondered if it was an intentional reference to that story from Bungie. Most likely no, but still! Very on point.)
There's one painting though, which I think I can actually make a homage of... Mostly because I wanted to draw something like that with Felwinter myself, so when I've seen that painting I was like whoa! That's it!! But I won't say which one it is, he-he... Hopefully I'll get it done soon
About the Exos - oh yes!!! That's possible! Actually, I've finally got my hands on "Lies of P" recently (and I freaking love that game already), and it has something similar going on there. At least, I think so; there's still some ~magic~ included from what I got so far. But I'm still at the beginning, so! Will see later! Very curious about how puppets work there in general and how there's such a... drastic gap in quality between P himself and everyone else.
(Please don't tell me anything about it though, I want to dig into everything myself)
Have a nice day too!!
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So, does Hollow just die in that AU where Radiance took control of them? Or is there even a scrap of a good ending there?
Hi anon!! Istg I did not mean to wait this long to answer holy shit it’s been nearly 2 weeks I am SO sorry
But okok originally, I just wanted to redraw the “Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan” painting with my gijinkas, so YES Hollow was originally supposed to just. Die. In this au.
BUT since I’m a sucker for pre-sealing AUs where Hollow gets the chance to forge real relationships with the people around them, ig it’s my turn to do it now lol
SO!! Idk how canon this is, but I headcannon that, while the infection reduces people to their base instincts generally, the Radiance can choose to individually control certain bugs, so when she realises that the so called “Pure Vessel” isn’t hollow, she realises she has the perfect opportunity to take out the Pale King in a way that he’d never see coming, mostly bc of how deep in denial he is that Hollow is hollow, and bc he’s so confident that he’s safe within the palace walls; he’d be caught completely off guard.
So, long story short, Radi infects Hollow instead of Xero (ik he’s not a knight but the caption sounded more dramatic that way) and tries to assassinate the king. In a last ditch attempt to stop attacking their father, Hollow momentarily wrestles back control and stabs themself instead, which further confirms the fact to PK that his child has a will of their own.
Like. When Hollow stumbles in, dishevelled, hair out of place, their armour nowhere to be seen, he genuinely assumes that they’ve finished their tasks for the day and have been ordered into his study. When he realises they’re infected, his initial thought isn’t that they’re alive, but that he was wrong in his assumption that you need to have a mind to become infected, and he’s essentially given Radi an empty puppet to play with. It’s only when Hollow takes the initiative to fight back against Radi that it clicks for him.
So! I’m open to suggestions about how or why this happens bc I’ve not figured it out yet (maybe Radi figures Hollow’s a lost cause and there’s no point wasting more energy on keeping them under her control is they’re dying anyway??? Maybe some void fuckery happens??) the point is, as PK takes Hollow into his arms for perhaps the first time in their life, the heat of the infection leaves their eyes, and PK manages to heal them enough that he can call for help without worrying that they’re going to bleed out in his arms immediately.
In the palace gardens, where Hornet is having a tea party with Herrah and the White Lady, PK’s cry for help is heard and Hollow is taken into a room where they can rest and heal (in the same wing of the palace as pk and wl’s room bc holy fucking shit we’ve been treating our child like an object their whole life they don’t even have a proper bedroom wtf is wrong with us).
That’s honestly as far as I’ve gotten with anything regarding a plot,
Again, I’m really sorry for the wait I swear I didn’t forget lmao and I hope this was worth it?? Did I even answer your question or did I just ramble for however many words
TL;DR: Hollow does survive!! There’s just a lot of whump before, during and after!!
#hollow knight#the hollow knight#thk#pure vessel#hk pale king#hk pv#hk pk#hollow knight gijinka#hk hollow#early infection au#I’ve not proof read this so if it’s rambly I’m sryyy#hope it makes sense!! lmao
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we met in september - chapter 6
Another day has started, and yet Y/N couldn't get out of bed. It’s not because of another episode, surprisingly. It’s due to that conversation between her and Dee. She couldn’t get it out of her head. Why would he be interested in being her friend? Is it because of pity due to the journal? She brushed those thoughts out of her head, and began getting ready for the day.
Nearly an hour would pass when she makes it to her first class. Dee was already at his seat and prepared for the day. Y/N sat down and took her materials out. Her accessories and boots jingled as she pulled out her pen and notebook.
She was too busy to realize that her seatmate and new friend was looking at her.
Hours would pass until third hour, where Mr. Orlov has assigned a project requiring a partner. It was a presentation about a figure in Russian history. Dee and Y/N were assigned to cover Ivan The Terrible.
She’s heard of Ivan before, the man cradling his dying son after beating him in a painting she saw once. Dee mustered a cough and already has settled out a plan; they are both responsible for gathering information, he will double check the accuracy of the info. Y/N is going to design the presentation with his approval. They will both take turns speaking on whatever the next slide is. Y/N was surprised that he thought of this so quickly; well, it's been five minutes since the project was announced.
They took this time together to gather some info, writing down as they went along. When the bell rang, Dee and Y/N were almost finished gathering some facts. Dee looked at her and asked, “Do you want to finish this during lunch?”
Y/N agreed. There’s no way she wants to have more homework for today.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
The day would drag on once again. Lunch was the time Y/N and Dee would have time to talk more. The duo went to an empty hallway and sat down near the lockers. They continued their research for the history project.
The silence was thick, and Dee coughed a bit. “So… what do you like to do?”
Y/N knew damn well he did not ask that question.
“You should know. You’ve read my book, haven't you?”
He puffed out some air. “Yeah, I know that you like to draw, but what else do you do?”
Y/N thought for a bit. That was something barely anyone asked her before.
“I like to watch anime.”
“Same here. What are your favorite shows?”
Y/N listed out her favorites, while Dee responded with his; Death Note, Hellsing, Vampire Hunter D, Higurashi, Elfen Lied, Attack On Titan, and Naruto. Both were discussing the show’s plots and how annoying the fandoms are. The topic then changed to music.
“I notice you’re wearing Joy Division. What’s your favorite song by them?”
“Wilderness. Do you listen to The Sisters of Mercy?”
“No, but I know someone who does.”
The conversation about music went on. They liked almost the same genres, except Y/N also liked to listen to new wave and gothic rock. Turns out, both are fans of Slipknot. They talked about their favorite songs, members, and their wish to go to their concert. Dee tried to learn guitar, but gave up because it was too difficult. Y/N can play ukulele, drums, keyboards, and melodica, but doesn’t bother to practice much. Dee had a look of surprise and a tinge of jealousy.
Pages were filled with facts and questionable trivia. Y/N put her pen aside and stretched.
“Are you finished with researching?” Dee asked.
“Yeah.”
Dee took her papers and stacked it with his. Y/N looked at him in confusion.
“... You took my papers.”
“Yes, I will look over them and compare them to mine tonight. Are you okay with it?”
“Y-Yeah man, just don’t overwork yourself.”
Y/N felt hot as she asked Dee that question. Why did she even ask that? It should be that simple.
Dee put the papers away in a folder and stood up. Lunch hour was about to be over and there won’t be enough time to go to physics. Y/N gathered her things and began to separate from her new friend.
“Hold on.”
Dee walked up to her with his phone in his hand. He then showed her his username for Discord.
“Do you have it?”
“Yeah, it’s (Y/U/N)#0000”
Dee quickly tapped on the keyboard and sent something. Y/N felt her phone buzz and pulled it out.
Discord
DarkPrinceDee sent you an image
She opened the app to see this.
She chuckled at the image and accepted the message. The bell rang and the duo went to their next class.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
Y/N’s third day would end without disaster. She met Dee at the stop as she was waiting for her bus. The conversation between the two would be interrupted with a lion cub’s roar.
“HEY DEEEEEEE!!!”
The blond’s face instantly deflated and was filled with dread. Y/N looked behind him to see a ginger kid with long, unwashed hair and a Manowar shirt sprint towards him. He tried to tackle him, but the blond managed to get him under control. They roughhoused a bit before the younger boy got Y/N’s attention. His attention span is the same as a puppy.
“Hey! Are you new here? Do you know my brother? You look pretty cool!”
Y/N’s Russian has improved, but with him speaking so fast, she couldn’t translate half of the stuff she was saying. She panicked, but the dark prince saved the day.
“Calm down Heavy. This is Y/N, she’s an exchange student,” he said as he switched languages. “Y/N, this is my idiot little brother Heavy.”
Y/N calmed down. That’s his brother? He didn’t tell him anything about having siblings. She let out her hand to offer a handshake.
“It’s nice to meet you.”
Heavy took in the handshake. He switched to his older brother and began to chatter. Y/N could briefly understand what he was saying, like when he got in trouble again for his unwashed hair or skipping algebra. The brothers didn’t look much alike, say for the noses.
Heavy then noticed Y/N’s changed demeanor. He instantly felt bad.
“Hey! Are you being left out? I’m sorry about that! I just had to tell my brother something! Say, how did you meet? Was it fate?! Huh, huh?”
She couldn’t comprehend what Heavy just said. She just chuckled and shook her head. She saw her bus and headed out. She said her goodbyes to the brothers. Dee waved back while Heavy just raised his hand in the air, shook it, and yelled a ‘bye!’
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
[Dee’s POV]
Dee was close to strangling his little brother. He and Y/N were just vibing with whatever they were talking about earlier, but Heavy of course had to barge in.
His mind was on autopilot on the way home. He didn’t even know what Heavy was talking about at this point.
“Hey, do you like Y/N?”
Dee stopped his steps. He gave Heavy a dark look and continued on walking. This sent the kid into a fit of giggles and teased about his older brother’s so-called “new crush.”
“I don’t like her like that shithead!” the blond exploded.
When they entered home, Dee instantly went to his room. He dropped his bag and flopped on his bed. He laid there for a few minutes before realizing that makeup was still on his face. While washing his face in the bathroom, he pondered and thought about Y/N. She’s a sweet girl, and has a great fashion and music taste. She looked kinda cute when she’s focused on something-
“DAMN IT!!”
Dee swung and punched the mirror. It didn’t shatter (thank goodness), but it hurt and left a loud thud. Knowing that Heavy and his dad are home, they probably heard it.
The blond sighed. He has to remember to revise the notes he and Y/N took after all.
Returning to his room, he pulled out his phone and saw that Y/N sent a message. He opened the app and read it.
(Y/U/N)
hey i know we’re working on something else but i have this project for art that requires doing a portrait of someone else. do u mind being a model for me? it’s alright if u don’t
Dee nearly snapped his phone.
DarkPrinceDee
Yeah, i’m cool with it.
#metal famliy#metal family dee#metal family dee x reader#dee x reader#x reader#reader insert#canon x reader#fanfiction#fanfic#milo writes
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Ep 6
1. I totally forgot but they give Paula’s age in this ep and she is 5. Five!!!! That means her classmates are the same age - wtf kind of parent sends a 5 year old to a boarding school? One that doesn’t bother show up when bodies pile up and a nazi plague rages, I guess. (Side note - I was not spoiled for actual Nazis and remember !!! when we find out, but in retrospect, it all so made sense.)
2. I love every bit of progress between Maria and Ivan. When he thanks her for not giving him away as he hid in her room on one of the gang’s shenanigans and she smiles...(look at ep 1 and now btw, what a contrast in attitude!)
3.Yes, they find a bunch of kid corpses and the teacher’s corpse. At this point, I’d be begging my parents for a transfer anywhere, even juvvie, but mmv.
4. How much do I love that when Ivan sees Noiret, his first instinctive move is to look towards Maria for reassurance. The kid is a mess and a project but he has rock solid instincts and he really does respond to genuine care so well.
5. I have always found it so utterly sad that Noiret shipped him away as much as he could, hit him and broke his bones on the regular and never said a loving word his entire life and Ivan STILL kept looking and hoping for any crumb of affection - the way he lights up when Noiret pals around with him (because as we find out shortly, he is about to go on trial for abusing his girlfriend and needs Ivan to bear false witness) - oooooof. OOOF.
6. But much as he tries to lie to himself daddy really cares - the way he boasts the man will take him sailing in the summer etc, he knows this is all not true. The way he bristles when Carol points out Noiret just wants something is because he is smart and he knows she is right (Noiret is terrible at emotional manipulation; the only reason it works with Ivan is because Ivan is so desperate) is because he doesn’t want to believe and he’s deliberately lying to himself. But you see him try to get out of testifying - and the way he tries not to antagonize Noiret, making up some exam he has to take, and the way he crumbles quickly and backs away from it - just ooooof. Most characters in this show needed serious therapy, but he probably most of all.
7. I do love that Maria is his good angel. First, watch him voluntarily come find her to apologize for losing his temper.
But also, when she tells him not to lie during the trial, to prevent his father from continuing to abuse him and daddy’s various women (and the way she gives agency to Ivan, saying he has the power to end it) and he’s just quiet really...
8. This scene! Where he says he doesn’t want to lie and daddy says truth is relative and the woman had it coming (!!!!) and something in Ivan’s face just shatters as he asks “and I, did I have it coming?” and Noiret can’t even manage a lie of being sorry but just grabs his arm hard enough to bruise as he claims he changed. All Noiret can say is he’s his father and this isn’t done to one’s father (but you are not supposed to abuse your children either and yet this didn’t stop Noiret) and then does he want Noiret in jail and I start wondering how badly he beat up his ex (and in front of his son!) to get a jail term. And the way Ivan walks off defeated...the most he can come up with at the end of this season as a means of fighting back is to try to run away so as to avoid testifying. It’s quite a growth from this to his standing up to Noiret the way he does in latter seasons.
9. Points for the show having Hector go wtf at Ivan going in and out of Maria’s room and jumping to “she’s banging an underage kid” conclusion because that is something people WOULD think. (Sorry, Hector, you have a bunch of adults being creeps of that nature in this show, but Maria is not one of them.) And it ends in make outs mmmm!!!
Show was really pushing them hard early on. I hope they eventually get together after the story is over and Maria has time and space to grieve Fermin.
10. Carol wanting a relationship but Marcos saying he can’t because he needs to take Paula and leave. And that is a little preview for Carol about never coming first. (Also, girl, you barely know him and your chemistry is so-so, not sure where your fixation comes from, but whatever.) Also, none of this prevents them from sucking face and like BREAK UP WITH YOUR EXISTING BOYFRIEND FIRST, OMG, CAROL!!!!
And of course Ivan sees. (Yes, he totally takes her back after all of this in s2. That is so codependent.)
11. That’s our last shot of him for this season, which is a fair preview of Ivan’s entire purpose on this show - being tortured while hot. To be fair, he does it really really well.
12. And the season ends on the fact that a student body is found in the woods. The first but not the last, just saying!
First season remains my least fave but it’s still really really fun and sets up everything really well.
Off to s2.
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The way you draw Belos was reminding me of a classic piece of art but I couldn't figure out which and then I realised it's fucking. "Saturn Devouring His Son" by Francisco Goya, I think it's the movement and the extreme lighting and the totally deranged monstrous expressions. Anyway this to say you are good at drawing horror
OH MY GOD THANK YOU SM....... GENUINELY SO TOUCHED RN UR SO KIND ANON <333 A HEEM HEEM..
And omg YES. I love that peice to bits its so good and definitely subconsciously inspires my take on monster Belos! (that and Ivan the Terrible and His Son as well!!!) Like. Ough. Adding exaggerated features like longer limbs, unhinged jaw, and big ol eyes really make Belos' cursed form seem more horrifying yknow!! Anyways anon this ask is gonna live in my brain rent free tysm <333
#Smth smth I like to always add a creepy undertone (or overtone) to any Belos peice I do and like.#Make his silhouette seem Bigger than who hes with lol!#Hes a creepy guy and its important to make that know <33#ask#anon
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📖 [short fiction] SPARK
📝 notes
Audience age Adult
Genre Horror
Length 951 words
As a convicted child-killer awaits execution, his sister is pulled by unbreakable family ties away from her new life and back to the truth she couldn’t outrun.
☕ If you enjoy this story and would like to buy me a coffee, you can do that here
📸 Header image, edited and displayed under license, by Oscar Ivan Esquivel Arteaga on Unsplash
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
And in the end, it all came back to energy. Newtons, lumens, decibels, volts… mostly volts. I started to see units of measurement everywhere, numbers to define how something could be experienced, seen, heard, felt, pressed, burned, used, destroyed. It started when I read that 2,450 volts of electricity would be passed through my brother’s body and energy began to mean something different to me.
These 2,450 volts would cook his brain and his skin, make his eyes bulge and melt, and his bowels release. They would cause him to jolt so violently against the leather straps that his bones would break. They would stop his heart. They might comfort the families of his victims, watching from behind glass in a room that was at once too close and too far away. And they might bring nightmares fuelled by cognitive dissonance to the people who unlocked the door, led him down the corridor, tightened the straps, pulled the lever. I had no idea what they would do to me.
I left a long time ago, and I never expected to be back. There was nothing here for me then and in just a few hours there will be nothing here for me again. I only came because he asked me to. He wanted someone on the other side of the window in that room who had no personal attachment to the boys whose deaths had finally brought him to meet his own.
Any real connection I had to him was severed years before when I bought a one-way ticket and didn’t look back, but he had no-one else. I wanted to say no to him. I wanted to carry on with my life as though my brother hadn’t murdered children in a country where I no longer lived. I wanted to maintain my distance with my new name from a brief marriage and oceans between us. But still, I said yes, and I went.
We communicated by letter at first. He told me he had come to understand that what he did was wrong, but he couldn’t help it. He knew each of the boys he had killed was someone’s son, someone’s brother, someone’s friend, someone, but his need outweighed that. He said he had always felt those urges, that they started when he was younger than his boys, and he knew it was only a matter of time before he progressed from doing what he did to animals to doing what he did to people.
He asked if I had been scared of him when we were children, if I had seen it coming. If I had known what he was. It took me a week to reply to that letter because I didn’t know what to say other than yes. The truth is, I had always known. When I heard he had been arrested, I spent a year in therapy I couldn’t afford, telling a well-meaning stranger that I should have said something, should have done something, to stop this. The other truth is I know there is nothing I could have done. I couldn’t have changed something so entrenched in the core of his being. I couldn’t have turned him into someone else.
Where we grew up, hunting was a part of life. It was a running joke that he was a terrible shot, but he wasn’t that terrible. He never missed entirely. He only ever missed enough that he had to finish the job with a knife. The loudest alarm bell was not rung by the killing of animals he hunted to eat, but by the killing of animals he hunted simply because he could. Sometimes he started to cut them up before they were dead, although I think I was the only one who knew that. I found him elbow-deep in the still-twitching body of a stray dog in the back field one day after school and all he said was, “Don’t tell anyone.” So I didn’t. And a year later, I left.
I had seen pictures of him on television and in newspapers, but during my first visit to the prison, I was surprised that he was no longer the fifteen-year-old boy he had been when I last saw him in person. His eyes were the same though—dark, cold, empty apart from the occasional flare of something like anchorless resentment—and I felt a stab of ice in my heart when he looked at me.
He said he didn’t think I would come, but he was glad I did, that he understood why I hadn’t stayed before, why I hadn’t come home when both our parents were killed in the house fire he escaped from unscathed at the age of eighteen. Of course, there had been no definite proof of arson, but I knew and he knew that I knew.
When the day came, he was given the opportunity to speak his final words before they brought down the hood to cover his face. He said only, “I want to thank my sister for being here today and for leaving before. Her presence was the only thing that held me back and when she left, I was finally free to do what I needed to do.” Then he smiled with a gentle, honest acceptance.
2,450 volts.
The thundering beat of my heart as I walked towards my rental car. The slam of the door shutting. The spark of the ignition as I turned the key. The roar of the engine as I drove away. The gathering speed as I headed towards the airport. The glow from the streetlights. The heat of my tears. And in the end, it all came back to energy.
#my writing#short fiction#short story#short stories#writeblr#writeblr community#writers#writers community#original fiction#original writers#tumblr writers#writers on tumblr#writers of tumblr#am writing#writing community#horror
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10, 16, and 29 for the historical asks
10. Pieces of art ( paintings, sculpures, lithographies, ect.) related to history you like most ( post an image of them)
Ivan the Terrible and his son Ivan by Ilya Repin
16. Do you own some historical item? ( coin, clothing, weapons, books, ect) If yes which one is your favourite?
Kinda? I have some old kuna (Croatian dollars) that my grandfather gave me but it’s not that old tbh. I’m sure there’s something that I’m forgetting about lol
29. Great historical mystery you are interested in?
I love the mystery of the Mary Celeste. Probably the most famous ghost ship (I would say the Flying Dutchman is more famous but that’s more of a legend than an actual ship) but essentially in 1872 the Dei Gratia came across the Mary Celeste abandoned at sea off the coast of Portugal 8-10 days after she set sail for Italy. When further examined the ship was completely empty. There was still 6 months of rations left on board and the ship’s cargo was intact. There was 3 feet of water in the hull and all the crew’s belongings were still on board. Only one lifeboat was missing. No one knows what happened but there’s many theories ranging from foul play to natural phenomena to, of course, aliens
Thank you for the ask!!!
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I posted 12,651 times in 2022
That's 4,361 more posts than 2021!
393 posts created (3%)
12,258 posts reblogged (97%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@a-disgusted-green-dorito
@retroactivebakeries
@dreg-heap
@testosterone-wizard
@theflirtmeister
I tagged 469 of my posts in 2022
#judge dredd - 21 posts
#dracula daily - 10 posts
#andor - 10 posts
#warhammer 40k - 10 posts
#doctor strange - 10 posts
#dungeon meshi - 8 posts
#mysterio - 8 posts
#doctor doom - 6 posts
#venom - 6 posts
#house of leaves - 6 posts
Longest Tag: 137 characters
#i would believe 2 guys being sweet to each other in the fucking trenches as the bombs are falling rather than it happening in a secondary
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
When you’re researching the origins of the Disney Channel theme and stumble across a bunch of PSAs of child actors talking about 9/11
524 notes - Posted November 22, 2022
#4
Dracula: yeah just go ahead and prepare letters saying you're already on your way home, that's normal here. If you could mention wolves biting you or being about to die of natural causes in the last one that'd be SUPER normal and helpful, thank you.
832 notes - Posted May 19, 2022
#3
Seinfeld, The Baby Shower (1991)
Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan on 16 November 1581 (1883 - 1885)
2,930 notes - Posted October 1, 2022
#2
Jonathan Harker: Yes, I suppose it's quite normal for a businessman in London to have multiple solicitors.
Dracula: Good. I am normal. Johnny my guy, I am so fucking normal. I am going to get a good grade at being a normal British business man. *skitters away in a manner not unlike a lizard*
4,085 notes - Posted May 12, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
Diversity win! The evil company that does brain surgery on its employees has gender neutral bathrooms.
4,412 notes - Posted April 16, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
#tumblr2022#year in review#my 2022 tumblr year in review#your tumblr year in review#I really have no clue what the context for my longest tag is sorry
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500 years of solitude...again
StoneSleep AU belongs to @calcium-cat , thats right I finally did something about this AU
Anyways sorry for the sad post here is an extra:
Dream just got out of the stone prison and has been banging on the locked garden door for hours now
And morning time is cold so he is freezing and tired
As you all can see his day is going great
#and the flowers were supposed to be White chrysanthemums#and I got pose reference from a painting thats called 'Ivan the terrible and his son' bc yes#and like#this is supposed to be a scene where Night is holding a very weak Dream that is struggling to breathe#he squirms around and begs for Night to help him#but Night knows that he cant#and as time passed#Dream eventually stopped breathing as the stone enveloped his body whole#its kinda dark now that I see it#but eh I like it#anyways#StoneSleep! AU#one small dream#dream sans#nightmare sans#this AU is so angsty but I love it so much????#stone sleep au
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death gives little regard to health
#this is where the solangelo rot comes from.#yes i know there are other pairings and yes they are nice but are they interywined with the fundamental grasp of life and death#and the attempted manipulation of something so primordial yet intangible#thinking about ivan the terrible and his son ivan#thinking about someone who is perfectly healthy can be very close to dying#soup talk#think about how life is snuffed out#the vacuum that is left when a soul descends to hades#the hollow carcass of a human
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not to . this again but i think about ivan the terrible and his son ivan so much . violence in its conception violence in the words of academics who told repin he was wrong violence when a man carved three scars into their faces and violence in the drunken fist that caved in the same place again 200 years later . he looks so haunted he looks so horrified the carpet is rumpled where his son struggled the blood bleeds in the silks of his clothes there is no weapon there is no fatal blow there is a brilliant red that blooms on his temples it’s just ivan and his son ivan and it’s so so so good
#YES i know the painting was likely historically accurate#NO i don’t know enough about russian history to have a good educated opinion on this#i am going to . delete this later i’m feeling not well enough to be emotional about this painting#also consider on the opposite spectrum vermeer paintings#both have the capacity to carve my heart out but one is homesick feeling and the other is#violence violence#ilya repin#ivan the terrible and his son ivan
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