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#why cant my brain and body work its so frustrating
not-actually-human · 1 year
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im literally witnessing the horrors <- its past 10pm and hes think about his future
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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#*problems occur on a project multiple ppl r working on* my boss @ me: what do u wanna do?#me. disastrously burnt out: i couldnt not even to give a fuck abt all this. i dont care i dont care i dont care#but thats not what i say. i say ok ill talk to the ppl and see how i can drop everything to help. and that probably means driving an hour#away to the other uni which is irrationally terrifying to me to the point where it will probably destroy my whole week a prevent me from#sleeping when i already am struggling to sleep. but its fine. ill get it done and itll be fine. for this stupid fucking project i dont#care abt. ay its so weird. ive never been this angry abt things. i mean its not even really anger its more dispair and frustration but it#manifests as just wanting to scream and throw a fit like a toddler. and i mean its my fault. i dont have to live the way that i do. i mean#i do but in an irrational compulsive way that i cant entirely control. but like its Saturday and i sepent 6 and a half hours taking#measurements and then met with my boss for like an hour and she was showing me cool imagines and talking abt cool new collaborators at her#new school and im just sitting there trying to maintain a smile bc my brain is semi disconnected from my body and im so exhausted#ugh. my brain is so fucked rn. i dont want to drive with even lower functioning thsn usual. and i was gonna meet my friend Tuesday morning#for once. and i might have to drive back and forth multiple days. ans what's my reward if were successful? two fucking weeks of watering#and measurement taking and i might have to stand around other ppl in all that time as well. usually im off spinning in circles by myself#amd looking unapproachable. i dont want to have to b a person around the undergrads#god im so weird. its like from the outside perspective if u were looking thru the window at me u would see me using a hammer and assume im#putting something together and i am but im also hammering nails thru my hand which no one asked me to do#so then why do i have to do it? ugh. thats y its a hard thing to complain abt bc ppl r like oh it sounds like ur compulsive habbits make u#productive and successful and yea sure but they're also destroying my life. im laying on the floor doubled over in pain and ppl r like oh#look how useful u r. who gives a fuck everything feels stretched and distorted like im suffering some sort of selfimposed Devin punishment#whatever. fuck this. tomorrow ill try my hardest to relax. literally i cant remember the last time i stayed in bed until at least 7am. ugh#but i also have some bullshit i have to get done tomorrow so well see#uuuuuugh let me leave this place @ schools send me ur official offers pls i wanna plan out my life for the next 5yrs#unrelated
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paradoxbeta · 18 days
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WHO IS EOC? i am very curious now!!!
>:) okay SO
tumblr picture formatting is utter garbage and i dont want these to take up too much space so im cramming these drawings into one row (or not if this crapsite breaks on me, because it seems to be REALLY fighting me on this, so if it ends up not making a nice little picture row know that i tried my best). but this is effigy of composure!
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he has a couple problems, but the big one is that his superstructure has a terrible parasite situation. the parasites are flat, thin, and able to make it into grooves and pipes the inspectors cant reach. flushing out doesnt do much to dislodge them and they breed faster than they can be killed, so theyve happily made their homes in this sheltered, food-rich haven (to the obvious distress and horror of the host iterator). originally the concept for these parasites were much closer to centipedes and had the placeholder name "synapcipedes," but ive since started leaning more towards an obvious tapeworm motif for them because its gross and i enjoy it morbidly. it also has some pretty cursed implications if you think about it for too long which i have decided are funny/really disgusting/so stupid that they have to stay. i still flipflop between considering them centipedes vs tapeworms though and i dont think thatll ever be rigidly defined. the ambiguity is nice to toy with
on the top 10 list of "things that are not fun" having turbo worms has to be somewhere up there, so eoc has it *rough,* and kind of sort of eventually barrels off into the deep end because of it. his futile attempts to clean his own structure are frustrating enough, and the constant feeling of bugs crawling all over the inside of his body (which only gets progressively worse with time) does no favors either. however, the real big reason why he mentally declines is just because there's a ton of centi-worm things eating like fire through his neurons and other what-have-yous that iterators need to think and function. i think if he only got hit with one of these 3 things then he might have been able to hang onto his sanity, but with the triple combo he doesn't really stand a chance of doing much except stalling his functional death. which is good on him because if i was an iterator and my overseers told me i had a structure infestation, my mental health would have just preemptively swan dived off a bridge before anything even happened
anyhow, exponential parasite population growth meant exponential increase in all this other fun stuff, which means the time from the beginning of the infection to the time eoc is considered officially gone is startlingly short (for iterators, at least). it still took quite the while because losing your marbles is a loonnnng process, but still, yikes. its unfortunate because eoc was a real jokester pre-everything, and a cool guy to talk to. he was one of those people who could come up witty comments for anything like hed been ripped from the script of a sitcom. oh yeah, also, should have mentioned this earlier, but he ends up accidentally amassing a scavenger cult mid-insanity which goes hilariously bad because he's barely aware it's happening. nothing really works out for this poor iterator.
tldr: eoc gets parasites, they erode his brain, he goes nuts about it, (accidentally amasses a cult,) dies
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lifewithborderline · 2 years
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Trigger warning
Life never fails to throw things in my path when life is going well. My mental health has been up and down and my relationship with my gf has been up and down but more up lately as ive felt more connected and open with her. My relationship with my little sister has been a bit strained as i did not want to be around her jerk of a boyfriend and her girlfriend. But they broke up with her and needed my support so i had her over and we had a great open conversation. She opened up about a flashback she had and had questions about. She said she was about 5 and she was under the table with no clothes on and just me and my dad were home with her, mom came home early and me and dad came out from somewhere else in the house. We talked about how i have very few memories with my dad but i remember that day. I remember before mom left she put a phone in the bathroom bottom drawer and told me if something happened i should call and she would come home. Well i have no memory of what happened until mom came home early and dad freaked out. I know i called her but i do t remember why or what i said to her. I remember being scared. But being scared wasnt a new feeling when i was with me dad. I dont know why i was scared of him either. I have so many memories of going out with my dad but dont remember what happened when i got in the car. Only one memory i have was being pulled over by a cop because we didnt have seat belts on. My dad told me not to tell mom and if i did i would be in trouble and it was my fault that we got caught. So when my mom got something in the mail about the ticket she asked me and told me it was dads fault for not being responsible and i should have told her. Anyway, my sister bringing up this memory led to an immediate migraine. After she left i started crying, part from the pain in my head and part i didnt know why. I ended up having a panic attack but thankfully my partner was able to help get it under control fairly quickly. Many people have told me that i seem to act like i was abused as a kid and i never believed them. But now im not sure. Did i block memories because i was and couldnt handle it? Theres not much information on repressed memories or anything like that that ive been able to find. But looking up things that kids do when they have been abused sexually it was like describing me to a T. I dont know how to process something that only my body remembers and i dont know if i want to know what happened. It brings so many questions up and so much frustration. Nothing gives me answers. Mom doesnt remember, she has had brain surgery and lost a lot of her memories and she probably blocked some too if it was that bad. My little sister has blanks too. My older sisters dont know or wont say anything. And i dont talk to my dad anymore and dont really want to. I had a few really rough mental days but now i just dont know where to go from here. I havent seen my counselor in a while and am waiting for my appt to come up. I feel so lost, and depressed over something i dont know really happened. Its frustrating that i dont want to be at work, i just wanna crawl into bed and stay there. I cant seem to sleep. When i do sleep its that awful surface sleep that i can head everything happening around me and when i wake up it feels like i havent slept. Now it doesn't help that im getting sick.
Sorry that this probably is long, boring and doesnt make sense. But that how my brain is now.
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self-h-rmageddon · 2 months
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i miss normal brain problems i miss when i was fighting over my body, when i was sitting back and watching someone else ruin my life, i miss when . you were there to punish me. because i didnt feel like i deserved it, i would FIGHT it then. i know you dont do that anymore, i know you dont want to, and i dont want you to either.. i just. miss the familiarity. i know why it was like that, you had to, there was too much happening, too much. an unfiltered constant stream of trauma.
im scared to seem. crazy. i know thats so wrong, i shouldnt push you away based on outside influence! but.. would they even get it? would they doubt me? berate me? would they shame and abandon me? it didnt happen before, im just scared it will eventually. i cant do this on my own, im uncontrolled im making up my OWN to fix this but im fuckingd dysfunctional!! it goes wel when i dont think about it, when i do my JOB. my job was to never think of it. funny how you think yr so confident, but it just takes a little push and yr scared and anxious about it like how you were before
i know why i am its cuz it didnt fucking WORK last time. well. it worked but it . it frustrates me to no end, it worked TOO good. and then they all felt alone, abandoned. strangers looking into their best friends eyes, treated like an acquaintance
it hurt, i know it did. if theres no place home for you, then where do you turn? i get it. maybe ill be brave enough one day, but not today, im sorry. you are lonely, you only have yourself. im just. im scared to have something taken away from me, im scared to lose control. im scared to give it up willingly. to take the back seat. i fight so hard for it and for what? can i be a good person? maybe i could
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indigo474 · 4 months
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123123-
I ran 5.2 miles today- in 12 minute increments.. because i can do anything for 12 minutes. i'm not sure but i think its harder to stop running, take a 3 minute break and start again. I STILL cant get my music to play.. its so freaking frustrating. me checking in with my body- everything feels alright, no reason to stop. .. no reason to stop no reason to stop no reason to stop... even if my brain is telling me otherwise.... i hit the steps a little funny and my ankle felt it.. still no reason to stop. and afterwards.. i just want to keep running. i shower and put on regular clothes even though i want to put on workout clothes and run. I have been struggling these past few weeks to get out and run. part of it as silly as it sounds is because i dont have my music. i cant figure it out. part of it is the weather and part of it is just me. one of my reps asked me what i was doing new years eve.. chilling at home. she tells me we are supposed to get drunk. oh thanks.. i didnt know. she looks at me like im crazy.. like the time i told her was just the clouds coming down to visit us. I made myself good foo, i'm 1 documentary in. Madison is on 2nd shit today. She texted me her schedule so i knew she had to be in at 3.. at 2 i started wondering if i should say something.. i mean, shes an adult and can get herself to work but i know she has to be exhausted.. at 215 i went into her room and asked if she had work today.. yeah bro.. this is why i hate 2nd shift.. she eventually got up.. she asked me to please make her bed.. i did.. she asked nicely and she's been making it everyday.. tylenol pm on her dresser.. not a big deal. it felt like a big deal, but its not. it wasnt open.
I thought of a new business.. rent a dog.. RAD.. i cant have a dog. i dont want a cat. if i could rent a dog on weekends it would be great. like tonight, i would love to have a dog here with me. we could snuggle, i'd take him for a walk, maybe a few times.. i'm surprised no one has thought of it. MAdison asked for a cat- where are we putting the cat litter? In the basement. How often are you going to clean it? everyday. NO.
Tomorrow i am making vegan soup. I haven't made soup in a while. I got a nice loaf of Italian bread. I'm not 100% sure what kind i am making but.. carrots, onion and celery..i have to figure out if i'm adding chick peas and orzo or lentils, tomatoes and special noodles that i dont have that. I also dont have the canned lentils sooo.. i have no idea what is open tomorrow. I do want to run. maybe not as far.. both my knees hurt after my run. i was thinking, i'm going to need a way to carry water with me if i am going to be running 5+miles in the heat. I am going to have to figure this shit out. I have to figure out what i am doing this summer for a vacation.. so far i have tried to get concert tickets to 2 different shows. I have time. I have time to figure it all out. a lady in the grocery store said ohh thats my girl -- to me.. it seemed like an odd thing to say. my life if is one odd moment after another and I absolutely love it..
I'll probably be in bed before midnight. 2024 wow
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bishiglomper · 8 months
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So I'm still obsessing over these 2 characters i dreamt about recently..
And usually what i do when i have a character concept is draw it out BUT UGH
The nephew has been using my comp all these months. Year? And we dont k ow why but the fucker doesnt charge. We've ordered a new cord and replaced the charging port but nothings sticking. 😐
But that means no drawing for me. 😣 im so frustrated.
Im too fuckin blind to do traditional jfc
Im spoiled by the tablet. Zoom and Ctrl+Z mostly. But also ✨layers✨
Just feeling whiny.
Cant sleep so i went looking for references to figure out how it would work to draw them.
Especially considering uh. That one of them happens to be an anthro bird.
I think he got isekai'd into big bird because the image i have is VERY NEARLY, literally Sesame Street BIG BIRD shaped (but more attractive anime boy- Actually he makes me think he'd fit into Tailspin 🤔). But even though hes a bird i always picture him with a human body at the same time, like layered under the bird avatar.
And he couldn't speak, it was sqawking and such. But there were like. Internal subtitles layered under it too.
And the OTHER GUY. He'd be weird to draw too. Because how i picture him isnt anything like my drawing style.
I went looking for different styles of eyes and before i even perused them im like. I know what they look like.
Dont know how to explain. Maybe like the manga NANA? makes sense tho. Hes a tall skinny goth. ...pirate.
Also big bird's internal human is short for some reason. And a little feral looking. More lion-like than bird. But they both have this fluffy hair. ....like big bird.
My brain is fuckin weird sometimes but I cant say its not predictable...
Tall skinny goth with smol sunshine. I think Eli and Laur are crying for help.
Also now theres a furry, w h a t
But the pining omg, my brain done called me out with the pining and the angst and just. 😘👌 I have tropes, what can i say.
I need to get these bastards out before they melt my brain
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Long vent ahead, tw for mentions of suicide
Love it when your angry and try to explain your emotions but then you start crying before you can explain your emotions so you get frustrated but then your parents ask why your sad and you try to explain to them that your not sad and just angry and frustrated but your crying so you can’t get anything coherent out so they keep asking you and you keep getting more and more frustrated so then you leave to calm down and they follow you and ask more questions and all you can do is tell them that you want to be alone and never end up being able to explain your emotions and then you get sad because you’ve never been able to explain how your mind or emotions work without crying. How tf am I supposed to tell them that how they interpret things completely contradicts how I actually feel if I can’t do it without crying. Which only leads to more misinterpretation. Is this even a normal fucking thing or was I fucked over for my entire life because of some brain development I never had any fucking control over? I don’t have any diagnosed disorder to blame this on and nobody ever understands what’s going on with me. I can’t explain myself and because of how frustrated I get I tell people to just not worry about it, and bottle it up. And even if I don’t try to bottle it up I can’t fucking cry. I have no other outlet and venting doesn’t actually help me express my emotions. I only vent to get some fucking advice only to get ignored by every single one of my friends. I’ve gotten more help from random internet strangers then my friends. I’ve gotten more help from fucking reddit. When I get frustrated or angry or sad or suicidal I can’t cry for absolutely no reason no matter how much I feel like I need to so I am FORCED by my own body to bottle it up. Meanwhile everyone else who thinks that they understand how I feel or what I’m going through tells me to just let it out or something like it’s just that easy. Like I should be able to do it on command. And when I can get express my emotions in a way that’s not sobbing it’s yelling at someone. I fucking hate it. I’ve lost multiple friends because I try to tell them how I’m feeling and no matter how many times I tell them they just don’t get it and I just. Yell? Why do I yell? What I say doesn’t make any logical sense when I do and all they were trying to do is help and yet I yell at them. I am such a genuine asshole and I have no idea how to fix myself, which just makes me more sad, angry, and frustrated which I again have no choice but to bottle up. It’s an endless cycle no matter how much I try to end it. Until a few months ago my mom has been telling me that the only person who has control of my emotions is me but realistically I am controlled by my subconscious. The literal voice inside of my head that has so much fun reminding me of what an asshole I am. I wish I was being metaphorical but I’m not. When I think, I think in my voice. And there’s another one of my voices, the one that reminds me of everything I’ve done wrong. I don’t wanna sound like I’m being edgy but that is the best and only way I know how to describe it. Because even when I’m not frustrated or angry, as long as I’m alone with my thought I’m sad because of that voice. I’ve been going through a loop of feeling constantly terrible since THIRD FUCKING GRADE. I HAVE WANTED TO THROW MYSELF OFF OF A BUILDING SINCE I WAS 6. THERE IS NO FUCKING REASON IT SHOULD BE THIS WAY. It is such fucking bullshit. There is no genuine reason for me to keep going. The economy is crashing, prices are going up and so is global temperature. The world is getting worse and by the time im an adult i might not have a chance to have a happy life. I’m verging on developing an ED because I constantly feel fat, AND ITS NOT EVEN MY FAULT. My body fat pools up in my gut and nowhere else. I CAN SEE MY FUCKING RIBS BUT I CANT GET RID OF THE FUCKING GUT. maybe if I worked out but I can’t even do that because I genuinely don’t have the time or energy. I wake up at nine and can’t muster up enough motivation to get up to get up until 30-60 mins later
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seita · 3 years
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— better than (m.)
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pairing : iwaizumi/reader
wordcount : 3.087
genre : fluff, smut, pwp
cw : college!au, athletic trainer!iwaizumi
tags : implied age gap (hes 27 reader is in college- age nkt specified. he's older tho), size kink, dom!iwa, pussy job (a lil bit), multiple orgasms, sensitivity kink (if u squint), squirting, fingering, creampie, aftercare.
note : this was just an excuse to write about how iwaizumi is better than any other boy <3 thank u to @toshisins for beta'ing this for me <3
+ summary : you're so tired of dumb college boys who hump and dump, with no stroke game, and can never even try to get you off. that is, until you meet 27 year old iwaizumi hajime.
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When you first met Iwaizumi Hajime at the bar near your college campus, you noticed how good looking he was. Well, that was an understatement - he was tall, fit with tanned skin and a confident aura that made you weak in the knees.
You hadn't actually had the courage to approach him, however. Instead, you let some college boy buy you a cheap drink and take you home for some mediocre sex before kicking you out after not even 15 minutes of his reckless humping.
The second time you met him was at the same place. He was sitting at the bar, nursing a glass of whiskey that was almost empty. His back was to you and it gave you a wonderful view of his broad shoulders.
The mediocre lay from the last time you had been there attempted to chat you up again with false confidence, as if he had been the best fuck of your life. Naturally, you weren't having any of his bullshit - he tried to rub your clit like a scratch and sniff, forcing you to pry his hand away from it, there was no chance in hell you were giving him another second of your time. He definitely wasn't the type of guy who took rejection well, if not evident by the way he exploded and went off calling you a wide, colorful variety of names paired with numerous hurtful insults that had tears of humiliation filling your eyes.
“Hey now,” a smooth, deep voice had interrupted his very public spiel, “Don’t punish the girl for your own short comings, if she doesn't wanna fuck you again, don't you think that says more about your abilities as a man?”
The other man sputtered, muttering even more curses before storming out - probably not wanting to tussle with a guy who looked like he benched every second of his day.
There was something about Iwaizumi that just immediately had your heart skipping a beat over him. He was kind, a gentleman, and never seemed desperate or overbearing. He was confident and comfortable with himself and where he was in life.
You quickly learned that Iwaizumi was 27, almost 28 and worked as an athletic trainer so he traveled a lot.
For a while, your relationship seemed one sided with him. You'd text him and he’d reply but he rarely ever actually reached out to you. You tried flirting with him, asking him out for drinks, but it never seemed to pull him in.
It was frustrating. In basically no time at all, you had developed a stupid puppy dog crush on him. You felt like a middle school girl with a crush on a high school senior - like he was never going to give you the time of day. You were simply too young for him.
You eventually stopped trying with him, choosing to delete your message thread with him and continued on with your life.
You went through more college-boy hookups - all of them ending in disaster. Quite frankly, you were fed up with mediocre cock and being treated like shit when they were done with you. It wasn't a nice feeling, being kicked out after they didn't even bother trying to make you cum.
You couldn’t help but wonder what Iwaizumi would be like in bed. He was just so attractive, you knew he had gotten his dick wet more times than he could count. He definitely seemed the type who preferred relationships over hookups.
That's when it occurred to you.
You pulled out your phone and scoured your contacts. It had been a couple weeks since you spoke but you couldn't resist bugging him just one last time. You opened a new message thread with him and quickly typed the question that was now plaguing your mind.
“Do you have a girlfriend?”
It was the question that had changed the course of your relationship with him.
When you asked, it was like everything fell into place. Perhaps it finally relayed to him the interest you had. All that really mattered was the fact he suddenly began talking to you, starting conversations and even venturing into phone calls with you.
You lost all interest in those college boys you once hung out with and went home with to get laid. None of them made you feel the way Iwaizumi could with a simple text message. He was everything a girl could ask for and you were shocked he was single.
Which was why you were quick to ask him on a date, not caring if it made you look desperate -- you practically were. You would be damned if he went off the market while you were busy beating around the bush.
Going on a date with Iwaizumi was like a dream. You were so used to dates at sleazy bars for a couple of drinks just so they could hurry up and take you home for a quick fuck.
Iwaizumi took the time to take you on several dates -- dinner, movies, walks around town to obscure shops he thought you might like, before it finally led to the bedroom.
You had never been nervous with sex but with Iwaizumi it was different. The routine was dumb college boys who usually fawned over your tits for a few minutes before their hard ons became the center of their brain function.
You found yourself completely bare on his bed as he stood at the foot, fully clothed. The way his eyes raked across your body like a lion eyeing its next, delicious meal had you curling in on yourself shyly.
His lips quirked up as your arms came across your breasts, shielding them from his predatory gaze, “Oh now, you know better than that, don’t you? What kind of good girl hides herself, hm? Acted so eager for my cock all this time, now you wanna be shy?”
You gasp, cheeks flushing hot as you register his words -- he’d known you wanted him that badly all this time?
He clicks his tongue, “You didn’t think you were subtle did you? Bet you would have done anything to get your paws on my dick when I got off work early the other day, hm? Showed up at your apartment...you were starin’ real hard at me, I’m right aren’t I?”
You think that to that day, lashes fluttering against your cheeks at the memory. He was wearing loose gray sweats and a muscle tank top that showed his biceps flexing with every movement he made. Your eyes had immediately been drawn, however more down to his crotch instead. Where you could clearly see the outline of his cock through the material.
You had stuffed your little fingers in your cunt for hours that night, thinking about how big he looked -- even soft, couldn’t imagine if he was hard.
“Ah, there you go again,” he muses, snapping you out of your haze, “Maybe if you ask real pretty for me, I’ll give you just what you want.”
“Please,” you immediately gasp, “Want you so much Hajime, i-it hurts. Can’t stop thinkin’ about you…”
“It hurts?” he huffs, finally reaching up to pull his shirt off, leaving you to ogle his pecs and defined abs, which flex as he works on removing his jeans, “Needy little cunt hurts ‘cause you don’t have a nice, fat cock stuffing it full? Such a dramatic little baby. I just know your phone is full of some little college boys’ numbers...why don’t you give them a call?”
You shake your head, “Don’t want them! I just know they’re not as good as you, Hajime, please...please make me cum, I'll do anything?”
“Aw, those idiot little boys don’t know how to make a pretty girl like you cum, is that it?” he asks, climbing onto the bed, making the mattress dip beneath you as he slots himself between your thighs.
“No,” you pout, letting him spread your legs, hands under your knees to open you up to his greedy gaze.
“So compliant with me, you just need a real man to get you off, huh?” he smiles when you nod, “Don’t worry, I’ll take real good care of you.”
Oh, you knew. Just from the way he moved his hips against yours, parting your folds so the head of his cock glided from your clenching little hole, dragging your slick up to your clit -- you just knew that he knew what he was doing.
As you looked between your legs, you felt yourself gush at the sight. His cock was so big, long and fat, drooling precum over your slick little slit, making a mess. He wrapped his fist around his length, making you whimper as his fingers couldn’t even wrap around the girth of him. He slapped his cock against your cunt, groaning at the strings of your slick that clung to him.
“Such a messy cunt,” he sighs, making sure to spank your clit with the head of his cock, laughing breathlessly when your thighs jumped in response to the sudden stimulation, “So fucking eager for me, aren’t you?”
“Uhuh,” you sigh, arching your hips, “Want you to fuck, please, Hajime, need it so bad.”
Much to your dismay, he shakes his head, “Can’t just put it in, pretty baby,” the pet name makes you whimper, “It’ll hurt too much, want you to feel good, yeah?”
“I can handle it,” you breathlessly reassure, canting his hips upward once more to drag your clit against that ridge on the crown of his cock, “Jus’ put it in…”
He doesn’t respond this time but still makes no move to put his cock inside. You’re distracted, however, by the way he now focuses on playing with your clit. Using his cock, he drags the underside across the hard little bud, slaps it once with the tip and before you know it your body is seizing up and you cum.
You let out a string of curses, falling limp against the bed as he works you through the quick high.
“See, that was so easy,” he chuckles, “Those stupid little boys you’ve been letting screw you have no idea what they’re doing, do they? Little cunts so sensitive, I barely even had to do anything to make you cum.”
You’re still trembling when you come down, licking your lips as you give him a dopey little smile and a nod at his cooing. He can’t resist leaning down, and pressing his lips against yours almost desperately. You wrap your arms around his neck, holding him in a deep kiss while his hand finds its way between your legs, two fingers sliding easily into your slick little cunt.
You moan into his mouth, “Hajime ah! ...please, make me cum again.”
“Fuck, you’re so desperate for me,” he hisses through his teeth, “Clenching around my fingers so tight. If I crook my fingers...right here...I bet you’ll just…”
As if on cue, his fingertips hook on your g-spot and you squeal, legs kicking out as you gush around his fingers. He bites his lip and continues to fuck his fingers against that spot, watching your eyes roll back, mouth falling open in a silent cry as you cum for the second time in mere minutes.
“Y-You’re so good, Hajime…” you praise softly, “Fuck, please, give me your cock now!”
He laughs and sits up properly again, pulling his fingers from your cunt. He examines them for a second, slick with your cum and streaks of cream covering the digits before he pops them into his mouth with a moan, savoring the taste of you.
“Alright, baby,” he sighs after pulling out his fingers with a pop!. He grips you beneath the knees again and scoots closer until his tip prods at your entrance. You shudder at the feeling, “Relax for me, pretty girl, let me in…”
Iwaizumi begins pushing in, letting out a soft groan as the head finally buries itself in your cunt. You squeal at the feeling, pulling your knees closer to your chest. The sound of you moaning and whimpering just from his head has him throbbing almost painfully against your tender cunt.
“Almost there…” he huffs, grinning at the sight of your eyes rolling back, “Ah, does that feel good?”
“Yes!” you cry out, “Biggest cock I’ve ever had…’s full…”
“Yeah, baby? It feels so good to finally get your cunt filled with a nice, big cock huh?” he laughs when you nod eagerly, “It’s alright, baby. You won’t have to deal with any mediocre college boys anymore, yeah? This cock’s all yours now…you hear that? All yours.”
Your hand flies down between your legs, finding your clit. He watches with lidded eyes as you circle the little bud and squeal, keeping his hips still to let you cum around his cock nice and hard like you need.
“That’s it, pretty girl,” he hums, “Get yourself off, you know what you need...atta girl…”
You sigh happily at his praise, licking your lips and relax against the bed once more. He takes that as his hint that you were ready, pulling his hips back before roughly slamming back inside your sensitive cunt. It knocks the air from your lungs and you cry out, unable to hold back your noises as he fucks you senseless.
He uses his strength to keep you pinned, forcing your knees against your chest, leaving your cunt open and vulnerable to his pistoning cock. Iwaizumi is so big that the stretch burns every time he sinks back into you, the tip touching your cervix with every calculated thrust, making your entire body ache with the deep pain of it.
But it all feels so good, you’d never been fucked like that before. He knew exactly where to aim his cock, keeping his eyes fixed on your face to watch your reactions, gaze flicking down to where his cock stuffs your cunt full to watch you coat him in your cream whenever he grazes that sweet little spot deep inside you -- a spot no other man had ever tried to find before.
“Feel good?” he questions, though he knew the answer even before you cry it out.
“Ah, yes! Yes, yes, yes!” you sob, “I-It feels so good, Hajime! Fuck, you’re so good at fucking me! You make me feel like a virgin all over again!”
He grins, “Yeah, I know I am, baby.”
His cocky, confident response would have been a turn off with any other man, but with him -- it only made you moan. He had every right to be cocky, he knew just how to use his cock and it was exhilarating.
“You gotta cum again for me, pretty,” he pants, “Cum again, one more time, let go.”
Your throat burns from how much you scream for him, the messy noises coming from him fucking your sloppy cunt should be embarrassing -- you’ve never made such a mess before. You’ve never been so wet, creaming and gushing all the way down his balls.
He didn’t seem to mind, instead he seemed to only be turned on by it.
“I want you to squirt, can you do that for me? Make a pretty mess for me.”
You shake your head, “D-Don’t know how...Can’t.”
“Yes you can, baby,” he purrs, “I can make you, you know that I will.”
You didn’t but, you couldn’t help but nod -- immediately believing him and trusting him. He shifts his knees just slightly, changing his center of balance before his palm curls over your pubic bone, thumb effortlessly finding itself pressed against your clit.
The change in angle lets him hit your g-spot even more brutal than before. You’re immediately arching and crying out for him, eyes rolling back into your head as you feel your orgasm slam into you faster than you’d ever experienced.
Instead of slowing you down, he works you through it, keeping the same, animalistic pace and keeps his thumb pressed against your clit, the rough pad of his thumb has you ogling. If anything, the calloused hands of Iwaizumi proves to you how much of a real man he is, those college boys have nothing on him.
“Give it to me, c’mon,” he urges, clenching his teeth together from the effort it takes to keep going to this hard and fast pace.
“H-Haji…” you cut yourself off as you feel yourself get thrown over the edge again. This time, something feels different and you can’t help but sob, “Please! I-I’m gonna-!”
“That’s it, fuck!” he moans, pace stuttering when you squirt -- your cum splashing against his abs as you shudder and squeal, “Good fuckin’ girl, my good girl. Shit, where do you want me to cum?”
“I-Inside! Fuck, please! I need your cum!” you immediately sob, nails biting in his biceps where you reach out to grip him -- trembling and crying from overstimulation as he works towards his own high.
“You sure? Shit,” you nod, breathless pleas falling from your lips as he finally stills, spilling his load deep inside with a long, drawn-out groan.
Everything is still for a moment and then he’s pulling out with a hiss. You whine at the feeling of your cunt gaping, yearning for his cock again, as his cum leaks out.
He hums, “Sorry about that, let me get you cleaned up.”
You sigh, and close your eyes, trying to relax and let your body settle its trembling. He comes back and quietly works on cleaning the mess between your thighs.
“Alright, up you go,” he sighs, taking your arm and helping you to your feet. You whine and wobble for a second, making him laugh, “You good?”
“Y-Yeah…” you stumble a bit and lean against his dresser, looking for your discarded clothes.
He has his back to you as he strips his sheets. Suddenly, you feel shut out -- like you shouldn’t be there anymore.
He brushes past you to his closet, pulling out some fresh sheets. You feel silly, standing there naked while he gets ready for bed. You bend down and grab your panties, clumsily putting them on before moving to pick up your dress, where it’s crumpled on the floor.
“What’re you doing?” he laughs, “That won’t be comfortable to sleep in.”
“Huh?” you tilt your head to the side and he pauses fluffing his pillows.
“What...you didn’t think I was kicking you out, did you?” he asks and scoffs at the face you make.
“Well I...usually I…” you shift on your feet nervously and he frowns, walking up to you.
He cups your cheeks and makes you look at him, “Jesus, who have you been fucking?” he laughs and gently nudges you towards the bed, “Lay down before you fall over.”
Fighting back a smile, you do as you’re told and sit on the bed, watching as he puts on a fresh pair of sweats, waiting for him to join you. When he does, he immediately pulls you into his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.
“Take a nap, and then we’ll take a shower.”
“It’s 11 at night, it wouldn’t be a nap,” you counter with a giggle.
“Well,” he sighs, “Take a shower in the morning then, and then we can go get breakfast, yeah?”
You smile and relax against him, “Sounds good.”
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8K notes · View notes
nothinghcppens · 3 years
Text
small talk- pietro maximoff
part 2
part 1 here
masterlist
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pair: pietro maximoff x female!reader
summary: after being apart of the team of super soldiers that hydra experimented on, y/n was one of the successful experiments and had been released to the world. the winter soldier and the siren had become the most prolific assassin duo in the world. but what happens when they get taken in by the avengers? what happens when she meets a particularly fast superhero with an attitude?
warnings: swearing, mentions of trauma, alcohol, kissing but like only that, minor sexual jokes
a/n: hi !! i just wanted to say thank you so much for all the love and support of part 1 of small talk and bad liar omg <3 i also wanted to add a taglist to future fics so let me know if you want added it! make sure to specify if you want to be added to the marvel or the harry potter one bc i have a harry potter fic in the works rn! also i’m gonna write a part three that’s just cute bc i want to keep writing this character heheh
“wake up!” splash.
the feeling of cold water hitting your face shocked you awake and you sat up with a gasp. trails of blue flashed from beside your bed and out the door, the clang of a bucket hitting the floor. “pietro maximoff. i am going to kill your speedy ass!” you shouted, jumping out of bed. not even caring that you were only in a t-shirt and shorts, you chased after him, following the blue light.
the trails stopped eventually, and so did you. you glanced around, listening for any sign of him. you crept over to one of the couches and grabbed a pillow as a weapon. “where are you?” you called, i’m a sing-song voice.
you walked around the room, “come on, don’t hide from me now.” the faint sound of his breathing was heard along with the dripping water from your hair and t-shirt. you followed the sound of his shallow breaths to the island in the kitchen. you dropped the pillow, climbed up on the island and crawled across it before swung your head over the edge, in front of his. “hey there.
he gasped, “shit.” you flipped your hair back up and sat back on your knees. pietro stood up and turned to face you before bursting into fits of laughter.
“i don’t know what’s funny.” you mumbled, glaring up at him.
“yes you do, you look ridiculous.” he huffed between laughs.
“i won’t look ridiculous when i’m putting a bullet through your head.” you spat.
“calm down, love. it’s only a bit of fun.” he said.
“i was sleeping piet!” you protested. you moved your legs so that they were dangling off the edge.
“okay, i’m sorry. i’m sorry!”
“you better be. i’ll get you back though.”
he stepped forward and leaned his hands on the island, on either side of you. “will you, yeah?”
his head was an inch away from yours, you could feel his breath against your face. you saw his eyes drift from your eyes to your lips and back up again. he leaned in slightly and your breathing quickened. “what’re you doing?” you whispered.
“what do you think i’m doing?” he replied in the same hushed tone.
“something you should’ve done a long time ago.” you leaned in towards him, lips almost touching.
“good morning!” cap announced, walking into the kitchen, looking at his phone. you two broke apart quickly, pietro speeding and grabbing you a glass of orange juice and ten occupying himself by looking at something in the cupboard.
“hey cap.” you croaked, voice uneasy from the nerves coursing through your body. “morning steve.” pietro greeted, closing the cupboard and standing next to you on the counter. steve didn’t look up from his phone and didn’t notice your wet hair and clothes
“how’s our newest recruit?” he asked as he grabbed a mug from one of the shelves.
“steve, i’ve been here for like 6 months!” you complained.
he put the mug in the coffee machine and pressed a few buttons, “and? you’re still the newest.”
“might be the newest but i could still take you down old man.”
“don’t get too cocky kid, i think pietro’s rubbing off on you.”
“ew i’d rather go back to being tortured than be like him.” you joked.
“how dare you! you know you love being around me.”
you made fake gagging noise and steve let out a laugh. he finally turned around and looked at you two for the first time this morning.
“oh- uh y/n? what happened, why are you soaked?” he asked, averting his eyes from you. your eyes widened in realisation that you were wearing little-to-nothing in front of your captain and your t-shirt was clinging to your body.
“pietro is a dick is what happened.” you said, pushing yourself off the table. “if you’ll excuse me, i’ll go make myself decent.”
“you look decent all the time, love!” pietro called after you as you began to leave the kitchen. you swivelled round and flipped him off with both hands before leaving the room.
———
“do you remember when-“ you let out a giggle and pointed at bucky, “when we had to kill those french agents and you-“ another laugh, “you fell over a wall! god i mean because my brain was mush i couldn’t laugh but looking back on it that shit was hilarious!”
you and the team were recalling old missions gone wrong, with the assistance of alcohol obviously, and you were telling a story about you and bucky- much to his dismay.
“i didn’t fall.” he protested, taking a swig from the bottom of beer in his hand.
“so what happened then? did the sidewalk just crumble?” you questioned, laughing loudly. the rest of the team sat observing the interaction, large smiles across all their face. pietro sat to your left with his arm around your shoulder, a drink in his other hand.
“okay. maybe i did fall.” bucky mumbled causing a roar of laughter from everyone. “but, remember how we were running through a forest in, where was it again?-“
“bulgaria.” you said, already knowing where this was going.
“bulgaria! yes. and it was raining so it was super muddy and you got suck in the mud!” he laughed.
“you left me there! i had to drag myself out.” you complained.
“well we had a mission to complete! you would’ve done the same.”
you rolled your eyes, “you’re right. i would have.” you felt pietro laugh from beside you and you smiled at him. “time for a refill.” you announced, pushing yourself up off the sofa. you wandered to the kitchen and took the bottle of wine on the table and poured some into your glass. due to the alcohol already in your system you spilled a little on the counter, “shit.” you muttered.
“need some help there?” pietro asked.
“i can pour wine myself thank you very much.” you retorted.
“i think the table disagrees.” he chuckled.
“shut up.” you groaned. pietro sped from the door to grab a towel and stopped behind you. he reached over your shoulder and wiped the spilled wine up. his breath was hot against your neck. you turned around, wine glass in hand, and looked up into his eyes. his hands remained on either side of you.
“this is the second time we’ve ended up here.” he mumbled.
“good observation, captain obvious.” you teased. pietro rolled his eyes and huffed out a laugh.
pietro took his right hand and tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, staring into your eyes. he kept his hand on the side of your head and leant in slightly for the second time in the past week. your breathing deepened and your heart was thumping against your chest. you tilted your head up towards his head and your lips were almost touching, just as they were a few days ago
“y/n! can you get me a whiskey before you come back?!” tony called from the other room.
pietro groaned in frustration and pulled away from you, tilting his head up. “i’m going to kill those avengers.”
“good luck with that speedy.” you said, tapping his chest lightly.
he stepped away from you, letting you leave his embrace to get tony a drink. after pouring him a glass of whiskey and grabbing your glass of wine, you and pietro entered the room filled with your team. his hand was placed in the small of your back, guiding you back to the sofa.
you handed tony his drink and he smiled at you, “thanks kid.”
pietro sat on the couch and you flopped down beside him, his arm resuming its place of around your shoulder. you swung your legs up and across pietro’s legs, earning a few looks from nat and clint. they looked at each other and raised their eyebrows with a smirk.
steve and bucky were telling a story of a party they went to in the 40s and how bucky had to drag him to dance with these girls they met. you took a sip of your drink and noticed pietro’s eyes glancing at your lips, “want a sip?” you asked, smirking because you knew that’s not what he was looking at.
he pushed his tongue against the inside of his cheek and sighed, “watch it, y/l/n.”
“oooooooh we’re on last name terms now?” you teased, smiling.
“yeah if you keep pissing me off we will be.”
“don’t be so easy to piss off.” you replied.
he leaned over and whispered in your ear, “cant help it. i’m frustrated.”
you pushed out your bottom lip in an overdramatic pout, “boohoo.”
tony then shot forward in his seat and clapped his hands together, “tomorrow you two,” he said, pointing at you and bucky, “are gonna have a little fashion show, i’ve been working on some suits for you guys and i need your input.”
“wait really?” you asked.
“yup. i’m not having you two going on missions in your hydra gear.” he explained.
“shit, thanks tony.” bucky replied.
“where’s my suit?” pietro questioned.
“you’ll get on eventually. your girlfriend is just a little more improtant.”
“i was here first.” he protested.
“girlfriend?” you asked at the same time.
“wait your turn, turbo.” tony said.
pietro scoffed and everyone laughed at the interaction.
nat stretched her arms behind her head and yawned, “alright losers, i’m going to bed.”
“yeah, me too.” clint added.
eventually everyone had made their way upstairs and all that was left was you, tony and pietro.
“okay. what’s going on here?” tony asked, wagging his finger between you guys. pietro’s hand was now resting on your leg which was still across his.
“nothing.” you said.
“uh huh? yeah that bullshit doesn’t work on me kiddo.”
“piet, sure nothing has happened.” you glanced at him and a look of annoyance crossed his face.
“yeah stark. nothings happened.” he replied through gritted teeth.
“well if anything does happen, stay safe.” he winked at you two, “and if you hurt her, speedy, she’ll probably hurt you back worse.”
you laughed, “hell yeah i will.”
“oh i know you will.”
“goodnight .” tony said as he stood up from his chair and left the room.
you swung your legs off pietro and stood up, “well goodnight piet.” a smirk grew across your face as you began to walk away.
“nope.” he stated, grabbing your wrist and turning you back around. he pulled you onto his lap so you were straddling him, legs on either side of him. he placed his hand on the back of your neck and pulled your head towards his before crashing your lips onto his.
the kiss was heated, after being denied it twice before. your hands moved from his shoulders to the back of his neck and his moved to your waist. his fingers dug into your hips causing you to moan slightly, he took this opportunity to intertwine his tongue with yours.
eventually you broke apart, both gasping for air. you placed your forehead against his and closed your eyes.
“you don’t understand how long i’ve wanted to do that.” he muttered.
“worth it?” you asked, teasing him.
“nope.” he joked.
you leaned back and glared at him, “you bitch.” you leaned in and kissed him again, running your fingers through his hair and pulling it slightly. he groaned against your lips and you smiled through the kiss, enjoying the effect you had on him.
pulling away for the second time, you both had content smiles on your faces. you leaned your head on his shoulder and closed your eyes, “you’re comfortable.”
he let out a hearty laugh, “thank you?”
“it’s a compliment, i could sit here forever.”
suddenly you were no long sitting on top of him, you were being picked up and whisked through the building. your hair blew around until you stopped and were in your room. “what just happened?”
“i’m tired and the couch didn’t seem good to sleep on.” he explained.
“woah, woah, woah. who said you’re sleeping in my room?”
“i did.” he stated. using his powers he stripped himself down to his underwear and jumped on your bed, under the covers.
“i regret kissing you. you’re a pain in the ass.” you complained.
“and you called me a bitch?!” he exclaimed.
you rolled your eyes and grabbed your pyjamas that were at the foot of your bed and walked to your bathroom.
“where are you going?” he asked.
“getting changed, i don’t want you watching.”
you closed the door to block out his protests and quickly got ready for bed.
“hurry up.” pietro called.
“stop complaining or i’m going to sleep on the couch.” you replied, opening the door and leaning against the doorframe. pietro was sat with his arms crossed over his chest, his eyes raked over your body and a small smirk grew on his face. “eyes up here pretty boy.”
he laughed and pulled back the cover before patting the spot next to him, signalling for you to join him. you shuffled over and slid into the bed. pietro wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close.
“so much for the whole tough super soldier act, you’re a softie at heart, aren’t you love?” he muttered in your ear.
“anymore of that and i’ll suffocate you in your sleep with this pillow.” you replied, closing your eyes and relaxed into his embrace.
“no you won’t. you’re too soft.” he teased.
“pietro. i’m warning you.” you yawned, “i don’t care how good looking you are i will kill you.”
“good looking huh?”
“fuck off and go to sleep.” you spat.
“sweet dreams, y/n.” he said with a small laugh.
“yep they won’t be about you.” you murmured, before dozing off to sleep.
———
“i knew it!” nat squealed. you squeezed your eyes close and then opened them, blinking rapidly. pietro lay behind you with his arm draped over your waist. he groaned against your neck and looked over his shoulder at the team standing at the door.
“piet what’s going on?” you grumbled, too tired to sit up and look for yourself.
“so when did this happen?” cap asked.
you finally turned over and sat up, seeing everyone stood in your room. “what the fuck? get out my room you creeps!” you shouted, grabbing the pillow behind your head and throwing it towards them.
“oh come on kid, when did it happen?” he repeated.
“none of your business steve.”
“we’re not leaving until we find out.” clint added.
“you’re awfully quiet little brother, nothing to add?” wanda said.
“i cant believe this.” you muttered, lying back down.
“last night, happy? but all we did was kiss okay, nothing else.” you explained.
“yet.” pietro stated. you elbowed him in the stomach and he winced at the impact.
“so are you two together now?” nat asked.
“well we haven’t had the chance to speak about it because you guys ruined our morning!” you exclaimed.
“what’s going on?” bucky asked, rubbing his eyes. he peered in over everyone and laughed, “nevermind.”
it seemed that pietro had had enough too so he sped out of bed and pushed everyone outside the room, closed the door and locked it. “much better.” he said.
you heard the murmurs of everyone outside, “use a condom!” clint shouted. footsteps retreated from your door as everyone left to go about their day.
“i’m moving out i can’t live here anymore.” you groaned.
“it’s not that bad, you’ve got me.” he said, crawling back onto the bed and lying on top of you. you wrapped your arms around his head and played with his hair.
“so are we like together now?” you asked, mocking natasha’s previously asked question.
“would you like that?” he asked.
“god no.” you joked, “obviously dumbass.”
he lifted his head up and leaned in to kiss you.
“nope. you’ve not brushed your teeth.”
356 notes · View notes
kaistarus · 3 years
Text
Mistexting Mayhem
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Pairing: Nishinoya X Reader
Words: 1.6K
Summary: You accidentally send Nishinoya a text that was meant for Yachi and now he’s knows secrets you were hoping he never found out
A/N: If you think this fic is anything but crack you’re wrong lmao I’ve always wanted to write a fic with this style and Noya is great for the chaos i needed. It was fun
Masterlist
[6:40pm] idiot⚡: look y/n without adhd id be too powerful
                         i could beet god himself in handtohand combat
                         god was afraid of my raw fuckin awesomeness wen i bursted from the woom
[6:41pm] y/n: there is so much wrong with what u just said
[6:41pm] idiot⚡: i have absoltly no clue wat
[6:43pm] y/n: put those 3 brain cells to work. I believe in you
[6:43pm] idiot⚡: but theyve reached their daily quota
                          plz there so tired and overworked
You snorted, a dopey smile on your lips as you laid surrounded by textbooks and homework, swinging your feet in the air behind you. You focused intently on the cell phone in your hand doing everything you could to procrastinate the schoolwork around you.
[6:44pm] y/n: noyas so stupid
[6:44pm] yachi❤: i thought you liked him?
[6:45pm] y/n: jeez Yachi. dont come for my throat
                       i cant help that i have bad taste 🙄
[6:46pm] yachi❤: if it helps he tripped over a stray ball today
                               maybe think of that till you don’t like him??
Unfortunately, the image of Nishinoya waving to everyone then biffing it only had you smiling like a dork. How you’d gotten to a point that Nishinoya being an idiot made you swoon, you’ll never know.
You raised your eyebrow suspiciously at the new notification on Snapchat from ‘Tanaka’ and after swiping it open you nearly dropped your phone. Looking back at you was Nishinoya, his head tilted and eyebrow quirked in confusion with a gari-gari kun shoved halfway down his throat. The caption at the bottom reading ‘daaaammn look at your prince charming go 😩’.
You frowned at the picture, letting out a frustrated groan at how your heart accelerated against your ribcage. You quickly tapped out of it and reopened the messenger app.
[6:57pm] y/n: we have to kill Noya
[6:57pm] idiot⚡: we??? what kind of mission is this??? 😤
[6:58pm] y/n: i like him too much. he has to die. its for my own good
You waited impatiently for her response and almost debated doing your homework since it took longer than you felt necessary. You supposed you had suggested murder to Yachi, but still…
When you finally received a response your entire body froze.
[7:11pm] idiot⚡: U LIKE ME?!?!? 😍
                          UR KILLING ME?!?! 😢
                          IM SO CONFUSED......
                          and a lil turned on ngl👀
Your hand covered your mouth in horror as you processed what the hell you had just done. This didn’t happen to people in real life. Mistexting was stuff people made up when they created fake texts for social media to get likes. You didn’t think people actually went through this.
You opened new notifications to escape the hell that stared you straight in the face.
[7:15pm] Tanaka💪: Yo, whatd u do. Whys Noya having a panic attak
[7:16pm] y/n: I accidently texted him instead of Yachi and told him i liked him 😣
[7:16pm] Tanaka💪: O wtf thats hilarious 😂
[7:17pm] y/n: ITS NOT HILArIOUS
[7:18pm] Tanaka💪: Hes askin if its a prank. Wat do i do?
[7:19pm] y/n:I DONT KNOW SDKFHJN IM THE IDIOT WHO STSRTED IT
He stopped responding and you banged your head against your pillow anxiously.
[7:23pm] y/n: YACHI ITOLD NoYA I LKED HIM AND NOU HE NOS WAY DO JI DO!?!????! 😭😭😭
[7:23pm] idiot⚡: THIS ISNT YACHI!!!!
                           HOLY FUKC U DO LIEK ME!!!
You screamed into your pillow. Were you fucking kidding? This could not be happening.
[7:25pm] Tanaka💪: dude, twice? i cant save u now 🤪
[7:25pm] y/n: betraying me in my time of fucking need? i’ll remember this asshole
[7:26pm] Tanaka💪: so vulgar 👀
You growled at Tanaka’s uselessness and bravely peeked through one eye as you went back to your conversation with Nishinoya.
[7:24pm] idiot⚡: STOP IGNORING ME I KNO UR TEXTING RYU
[7:26pm] idiot: IM GONNA KEEP SPAMMING U TILL U ANSWE RME😤
[7:26pm] idiot⚡: 1
                          2
                          3
                          4
                          5
                           6
                           7
                           8
                           9
[7:27pm] y/n: what is this twitch chat? fuck 
[7:28pm] idiot⚡: your heeeeererererreee 🥰
[7:29pm] y/n: soooooo………..
                        clearly there has been a misunderstanding
[7:29pm] idiot⚡: oh nonono. I understand PERFETCLY. u LOVE me
                         its ok. this is a safe space. we can discuss feelings 😌
[7:31pm] y/n: there are zero feelings to discuss
[7:31pm] idiot⚡: then y did u say u like me too much so i have to die?
[7:34pm] y/n: i am filled with rage 🤬
[7:34pm] idiot⚡: rage over how much u liiike me???🥰🥰🥰
[7:36pm] y/n: definitely not
You racked your brain for some kind of reasonable sounding excuse, eventually landing on:
[7:36pm] y/n: It was autocorrect
[7:36pm] idiot⚡: HAH????? FROM?????
[7:38pm] y/n: HAH???
                       ....Nora?
[7:38pm] idiot⚡: Who TF is nora???? 😡
[7:39pm] y/n: someoe i like obviously 😏
[7:40pm] idiot⚡: so u like them but u use my name so much it autocorrected to me? 🤔
[7:44pm] y/n: OK MR DETEcTIVE WHERE TF ARE THES BRAIN CELS COMIN GFROM?
[7:45pm] idiot⚡: i pull them out for special ocasions 😌
[7:45pm] y/n: well how bout you pack those up and put em away
[7:46pm] idiot⚡: how bout two people who LIKE each other SAY something so they can DOOOOOOOO something bout IT 🙄
You began typing a frantic message about how it was none of his business until you processed the message. Then you read it over several times before letting out an audible, “what the fuck.”
[7:50pm] y/n: YOU LIKE ME
[7:50pm] idiot⚡: I FLIRT WITH U ALL THE TIME WAT DO U MEAN yOu LiKe Me!?!
                          FUCKING OBVIOSLY
[7:51pm] y/n: literally when. name one time.
[7:52pm] idiot⚡: I WALK WITH U EVERY MORNING!!!
[7:53pm] y/n: I thought that was a coincidence???
[7:54pm] idiot⚡: I BRNIG U SNACKS DURING LUNCH!!!
[7:54pm] y/n: I thought they were leftovers??
[7:55pm] idiot⚡: …....I call you cute and invite you to my games.
[7:56pm] y/n: you call everyone attractive and i thought there was like a audience quota or something........?
[7:57pm] idiot⚡: ….i cant tell who i should be upset with rn but i think its u 😑
[7:58pm] y/n: WAT WHY!?!
[8:00pm] Idiot⚡: I LIKE U+U LIKE ME=WE LIKE EACH OTHER
[8:01pm] y/n: whoa. slow down. I hate math 😣
[8:02pm] Idiot⚡: ===WE SHUD GO ON A DATE!!!
[8:02pm] y/n: HAH!? i think you started multiplying that addition problem buddy 🤨
Your cheeks were beginning to ache from how wide your dopey grin was. You couldn’t help but tease Nishinoya-it was second nature at this point-even if you now knew your feelings were mutual.
[8:04pm] idiot⚡: i suk at math but thats NOT the point
                         point iiissss i think deep down u want to hang out and cuddle and fall in love
                        maybe even..... 😏 kiiisssss
[8:04pm] y/n: WHOA WHOA WHOA
                        WARN ME BEFORE YOU GET NSFW
                        i would never premarital eye-contact. let alone k🤢ki-🤢🤢kiss🤢🤮🤮
[8:05pm] idiot⚡: well we would have socks on 🙄
[8:06pm] y/n: oh. well if there’s protection
[8:06pm] idiot⚡: Im not a maniac
[8:07pm] y/n: i suppose as long as you dont do something stoopid
                        like faceplant in public
                        that would be humiliating
[8:08pm] idiot⚡: I-
                          who told you that 😠
[8:08pm] y/n: i have spies everywhere noya
                        youre never safe
[8:09pm] Idiot⚡: kinda hot 👀
                         makin me fear for my life like that👀
[8:10pm] y/n: i hate that i like you
                        It kills me inside 
                        i feel braincels leaving with every conversation
[8:12pm] Idiot⚡: fan behavior 😏
                          so am i taking u to eat tomorow or wat?
[8:14pm] y/n: if I HAVE to 🙄
[8:14pm] Idiot⚡: No u GET to
                          I am a fucking delite 😤
[8:15pm] y/n: whatever helps you sleep at night
[8:15pm] Idiot⚡: nothing helps me sleep at night. this mind never rests
[8:16pm] y/n: thinking 24/7 and still not a smart thing comes out of that mouth 👀
[8:17pm] Idiot⚡: yas, bully me more 😫
[8:19pm] y/n: ok thats as much as i can handle for one day......
                       im gonna pretend to do homework
[8:20pm] idiot⚡: okie... good luck my sweet baby pogchamp 🥰
[8:20pm] y/n: no
[8:20pm] Idiot⚡: 😘😘😘
[8:22pm] y/n: 🙄✋
[8:23pm] Idiot⚡: oh FUCK yas 🥵 shut me UP
[8:25pm] y/n: suddenly all i feel is endless regret
[8:26pm] Idiot⚡: i have that effect on people
                          See you tomorrow 🥰🥰🥰
[8:27pm] y/n: unfortunately 😘
[8:27pm] idiot⚡: 🥵
You flung an arm over your eyes and let a small giggle bubble up from your chest. Nishinoya was probably the biggest idiot you’d ever met, but you couldn’t help that thinking of spending time with him had you kicking your feet with excitement.
You supposed you should actually get started on your homework. You reached forward when a notification popped up from Yachi, asking if her idea worked and you had stopped liking Nishinoya.
...you should probably break the news, huh?
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jangmi-latte · 3 years
Note
(Twst Anni!) Oneshot form please! I know I can choose up tot wi characters, but in this case, I’m just gonna choose one for Vil (i cant think of any other lines that appealed to me): “Beautiful flowers are poisonous. But isn’t that just another one of their charms?”
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╰──➢    “Beautiful flowers are poisonous. But isn’t that just another one of their charms?”
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❥ ara ara you geared something in my brain. may our waiter, vil schoenheit, treat you with this anniversary special dessert!
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Another hit bashed his sides as he fell to the ground. No pain did adhere to his figure yet the disappointment of failing yet another training session made him scowl to himself. His foil was thrown across the room in a sign of defeat. His father sighed while you kept yourself sitting on the chair in worry. “Vil,” his father began, helping his son up and continuing, “It’s time for you to rest. You’ve done enough for today.”
“I want to continue, papa,” came his struggling grunts while he stood up. Patting down the dust on his pants, he walked to pick up his foil. However, his papa prevented him from going any further with a tight grip on his wrist. “I said, that’s enough.”
“But I’m not tired--”
You wanted to run and comfort the boy -- your best friend. His father had already removed his fencing mask off of him. “Vil. You need to rest. You’re already frustrated enough to continue.”
Mr. Schoenheit’s eyes glanced at you, nodding his head over at his son while his hand laid at the small of his back. Vil’s face was cast down, hands balled into fists with teeth gritted in frustration. You looked at the older man and quickly set your feet down on the floor and ran over to your friend. 
“Let’s go outside, Vil. The sun can calm you down."
Vil looked at you in the eyes, his expression not even fading — gazing down at your hands holding his. He doesn't know what he’s feeling but immense frustration. Towards who? Himself. He brought you to his home to show you how much progress he did with fencing and yet he just wiped the floor with his failure. The shame of failing his own ability. How did he word his statement again?
“Come to my house! I’ll show you how much stronger I got with fencing!”
Stronger, huh.
“I’ll make you something to drink.” Mr. Schoenheit placed a hand on his son’s head, “You go outside with y/n. It will help you greatly.”
Now both of you sat at the porch of his home, listening to the white noises his little village made whilst drinking some nutritious smoothie. It was quiet between the two of you. No awkwardness, no uncomfortability, just feeling the presence of one another. You gazed at Vil, his blonde locks covering his face yet you could see how he stared at the pavement below him. His lips remain locked around the straw as you watch him subconsciously swallow down his smoothie.
“Vil?” you called.
“Hm?” he responded yet his eyes never left where they desire to look.
Your mouth ran dry; what did you want to say to him? Think, y/n. How can you emotionally support your friend who was disappointed? “You did great back there.”
Really, y/n?
“You’re only saying that to make me feel better,” he exhaled, taking his time to finally glance at you. His glass is now empty and yours still half full. You tripped on your words, scratching the back of your nape. “I didn’t do well. I know that. I just need to try harder.”
“But you really did better. It’s okay to fail, you know. You’re still ten years old.”
“You speak as if you’re any older than me. I’m fine, y/n.”
“You don’t look like it.” You placed your glass on the steps beside you and scooted closer to Vil. “You’re stubborn, you know that. I saw how you wanted to cry back inside and yet you didn’t let yourself. If you want to cry now, then I have a shoulder for you to cry on!”
Vil shook his head in denial, twirling his straw as he looked away. “I don’t like showing signs of weakness. You’re being ridiculous.”
“Sheesh.” You gave up, huffing in defeat while you slurped on your smoothie. You know it’s useless to get into Vil’s head. When he’s determined to do something, you know he wants it to happen. Despite seeming weak already, he wants to stay strong. How poisonous. Even you wanted to keep on going through his head.
You already saw his success by being a child influencer. You were there -- or at least try to be present -- during his stage plays. His movies? Oh, Vil would use his dad’s phone just to contact you and how everything is going. What else does he want? Surely, he would tell you about this and that and how the world of media is different from his little village in his homeland. He failed just ONE round of fencing and now he’s sulking.
Why won’t he tell you his objective this time?
He could beat you in fencing himself. Even his dad would wince every time Vil would attempt to playfully punch his arm. He’s that strong already. What else, Vil. What else do you want?
You wish to know the answer eight years later.
You sat in Pomefiore’s lounge, the leg over your other, swinging in boredom as you scanned through endless magicam content. Epel was so close to looking like a pile of hay with his hands tugging on his hair countless times. Looking at your junior, you sighed and placed your phone down. “Magical pharmaceuticals? That’s Iodine. It can be used to revive dead plants. Wait, why are you studying this? This is for second-years.”
“I wanna prove something to Vil-- I mean, my senior…” he admitted laying his head on his arms in distress. “He said the first step into being stronger is to be smart. So I...well..borrowed some books from other second-years.”
“Be smart? I don’t think Vil would say something like that…” you said.
“I ‘on’t know! I didn’t understand a single w’rd he said s-so I assumed that!” he burst out as he sat back with a scowl on his face. You sighed, scooting closer to the boy and wrapping an arm around his shoulder. Just across the room where the both of you sat were Vil and Rook. You can’t hear what they’re talking about yet you could see how focused they both were as they communicated with another third-year. 
“Epel, you know…” you began, rubbing his arm in a comforting way, “Whatever Vil told you, he just wants you to do well.”
“But ‘e’s too harsh!”
“Not everything is going to be easy and Vil just wants to see you work hard. You wouldn’t be able to carry that interviewer’s luggage if it wasn’t for him working out your arms right? He just finds a way to gear you up.”
“He succeeded alright…” he mumbled, following your gaze over to his senior. As he looked at Vil, he remembered how he turned down his magic wheel design in order to bring out his full potential in creativeness. Admittedly, he often misunderstands Vil’s words into something much cruel but people learn from mistakes, right?
With a deep inhale, Epel stood up and collected the books. “Alright! I’ll prove to Vil that I’m gonna be the best. Someday, I’ll… I’ll…”
“Think about it Epel. You still have a long way to go.” 
“Ahhh…” he moaned and nodded. “I’ll be back! I still have some flowers to pick for the experiment! See you, y/n!”
You waved at the departing boy. Adorable. No small body can hold such a big ambition. And just what was still the answer to your question about Vil? What does he want?
“That boy,” you heard the dorm leader sigh as he and Rook walked closer. The latter chuckling to himself as he sat beside you. “He complained again, didn’t he?” he questioned. Nodding as a response, you laid your head on the arm of the couch as Vil eyed you.
“He misunderstood me again, no?”
“He understood afterward. No biggie,” you grinned.
“Either way, you conveyed my message--” He moved his hand, swatting the air in a sign of disregard, “But that won’t be the last time I’ll persuade him to do better.”
“We know,” You and Rook simultaneously spoke. You mentioned how Vil could even tolerate Epel’s attitude and how immune he is to his personality. You remembered how both yourself and Mr. Schoneheit are immune to Vil’s determination and non stop hard work. Is there a difference? Maybe there is, maybe none. That’s a Pomefiore student after all.
No harsh or rude words can knock them down. Determined? Hah! That’s a battle with oneself against the world. How poisonous would a flower be if its beauty and ability are showcased to everyone. Nothing can destroy something so elegant yet powerful when they are their own poison. Being poisonous is something to brag about.
“He’s cute but he’s the first student in Pomefiore that can fight you Vil.”
The young man laughed to himself, smirking your way in delight. “That’s a challenge I am looking forward to. After all, beautiful flowers are poisonous. But isn’t that just another one of their charms?”
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© jangmi-latte, all rights reserved. Happy to Serve!
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slashingdisneypasta · 3 years
Text
Human!Freddy Krueger x Fem!Reader || Oneshot
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Title: What The Fuck Now, Freddy!?
Notes:
This is not inherently romantic, at all. Or sexual. Just... Freddy being a bastard, and you are caught in the crosshairs- and are forever linked with him because of it.
I've been listening to Lizzie, a lot lately- and this is inspired by 'What The Fuck Now, Lizzie!?'
Also- I'm thinking this will have a part 2. Due to the ending not being quite enough. Maybe a part for the court proceedings!
Plot: Many will know the story of that terrible day Krueger essentially snapped- killing his wife, Loretta Krueger. She saw the basement, they say, and he didn't like that. Their daughter saw the whole thing and suffered a traumatic response to seeing the sight of her mother, strangled to death, by her father- and forgot the whole thing.
But if she were to remember something, one day.
She may remember something no one knows about that day, aside from Freddy himself.
She may remember, that someone else was there.
She may remember you.
//
Alternatively- you're being blackmailed by Freddy who found out you, another supposedly Plain Jane in Loretta's 'mothers club', is cheating on your husband and calls you up to help deal with the mess he made. Because who else did he have?
Warnings: Okay lemme see, its basically a potluck of triggers. Hm. Murder, swearing, cheating (You, on your husband. Not with Freddy), getting rid of a body, a child gets traumatised (Obviously, Kathy/Maggie), Freddy himself, mention of the basement and all that entails, reader with a very questionable moral compass. Look, I think if you can watch Freddy's Dead, you're good here.
I'm just heading out the door, to go grocery shopping - or, at least, that's the story I tell my husband. When really I don't do the grocery shop until the day after tomorrow. He never notices... - when the phone rings. By very nearly tripping over my feet in my endeavour to catch it before the ringing stops, I manage pick up the phone with very little injury besides an achy, slightly twisted ankle. "Hi! Hi, sorry, I'm here. Hello?"
Pouting, I sit down at the kitchen table; Rubbing my poor ankle to sooth the pain, which would soon diminish anyway. Still- I'm sorry, ankle. I'll try to chill.
When the voice on the other end reveals who it is who's called the house, I lose all need to be pleasant. Damn. I really need to memorise this goddamn number... so I can not answer it. "Whatcha wearin'?"
"Thank god Harrison didn't answer this, you fuck." I deeply roll my eyes. Thank god Har's out. No, this is not my mister, not the man I was going to meet just now- but its bad, enough. In an entirely different way. Its stupid, blackmailing, son of a... hundred maniacs. "What do you want?"
"What a way to answer the phone, Y/N. Gee, seems like every time I we talk, I'm learning how you really aren't in the right place, are you? Cheating on your poor husband, swearing... These aren't really signs of the perfect suburban house wife, is it?" Gritting my teeth, I keep from lashing out. I've learned, if you stay real quiet, Freddy wont have anything to pull from and will get bored quick. "Why so silent, hm?"
"... " Oh, fuck me. I cant help it. "Wondering where you get off judging me on being 'suburban', actually."
"Anywhere I like, thanks."
Oh... oh. Gross?
He doesn't see the disgust tearing my face into two perfect halves right now, but my silence must be enough as he laughs. The sound is directly into the phone, and harsh on my poor eardrums. Ugh... "Oh for gods sake... What are we? Fourteen years old?? Come on- why'd you call?"
"Uhhhh... " Quickly, midway through that drawn out 'um' sound, Freddy's voice transitions, and gets a whole lot darker. Something deep in his chest dislodging, to make it so. Perhaps, his heart. "Well... you might wanna come and see for yourself."
"Uh, I don't think so. I have somewhere to be right now- "
"Oh well you don't, anymore." And its clear what he isn't saying- or else I'll tell Harrison about Carter and set your life on fire. "Tell your boy toy you're takin' a reign check for the day. I think you'll last. In fact... after you come over here, you might be out of the game for a couple a hours at least- maybe days."
Hold on, hold on Freddy what the fuck- "What!?"
"... Believe it or not, I didn't actually mean for that one."
Moron.
~
Nevertheless, no matter how just... off setting, Freddy is, I had to when he asked. I had to jump when he said so.
Because if not, then he would tear my life apart.
So here I am, about to knock on that big red door he lives behind, wondering what I'm walking into. Where's Loretta? Where's Kathy? How long will the visit be? I told Carter I'd be an hour or two late- any longer and I wont see him at all today. Which would absolutely suck.
Just after my knuckles come down on the wood the first time, a hand comes down on my shoulder and I immediately jump out of my skin... then slowly look around.
There's Freddy, a cheeky grin on his face. It does nothing to set my nerves at ease. "Ugh... Why are you out here?"
"We're going to the backyard. Lets go." Taking me by the shoulders, he marches me around the side of the house, instead of through it for some reason, and into the familiar backyard. I've been here numerous times, as Loretta likes to hold our club meetings here - Barbecue's, tea's... that sort of thing. Just to let the kids play together and so the adults can enjoy some adult conversation. Its a nice yard... but depending on what her horrid husband is about to show me, it may not be considered as such anymore... - , but I'm now starting to develop a sick feeling in my stomach.
Honestly- I don't know much about Freddy at all. Yes, I went to school with him, but that doesn't mean much when he was a freaky loner kid the whole time. I remember he killed the class hamster once- that's about the only splash he ever made in the news pool; But it definitely stuck.
Yes, Loretta cleaned up his image a fair bit since getting married, but now he's blackmailing me, and as far as I know I'm now alone with him.
Suspicious of him suddenly, I slip out of his grip with a dirty look flashed his way. Don't touch me.
He just rolls his eyes, leading me around some hedges.
And then everything stops.
Him, me, the air; The air around me, the breeze, the breath in my throat.
There lays Loretta, on the ground. If I was really really naïve, I could imagine she were sleeping... or passed out, at least, due to the way she's sprawled out. No one would lay down like that willingly.
But... her eyes are open.
For a moment I'm tempted to kneel down; Take a closer look. Find out how, myself. Is she bleeding anywhere that I cant see now? Are her lips turning blue? If I moved some short red hair out of the way- would their be marks on her neck yet?
But then I come to my senses...
And freak. The fuck. O u t.
"What, the fuck, did you do!?" I whip around, looking at Freddy now which entirely new eyes. I mean, before I sure wasn't fond- but now I'm filled with something new, looking at him. Something a lot worse, something that makes me want to run. Run, and hide, and stay there.
And all these, even though he hasn't really changed. He still wears a mischievous smirk, stony blue eyes eating up my reactions... like always. But this time its just so so much worse. "Made some dead weight- now you're gonna help me get rid of it. So!" Finally, though its been only a matter of seconds, he turns his gaze off of me and I'm glad. That gaze is far too heavy. "Ideas?"
Only for a moment am I lost for words, struggling to push anything out. "I... I'm sorry??"
His gaze returns to mine, but this time my eyes are hard as his are dark. "Help. Me. Get rid of her. Fucking. Body. Or do you want your dirty laundry aired for the whole community to hear?"
Before I can help myself, I let out a sharp laugh, only succeeding in making Freddy's scowl deeper. "Freddy- this secret's a lot bigger, then mine. Sure, I might get divorced- but you're going to prison!" Does he get that? He's g o i n g to j a i l. Crossing my arms, I try to avoid looking at my ex-friend's body. I cant. "I'm sure as hell not gonna be in there with you, for being an accomplice."
I really cant look at her... I can only focus on Freddy. And that takes a lot of energy- its taking everything in me, in fact. Everything I have. But I have to. If its him or her, there's no choice.
But... then a creepy smile spreads across his face- a vast polarity to the frustrated glower of before. It makes my blood run cold.
"Ohhhh..." He looks almost ferocious, even in his composed state. Like a monster. Like any moment a fanged, inhuman creature is going to burst out of him and I'm going to wake up, and this will have been a nightmare. A horrible nightmare. The kind where that creature haunts me for a long time, after its over. After this over.
He's going to haunt me.
"You must think this is my first time... " My heart turns to ice, mouth hanging a little open... what the fuck have I found myself a part of!? Suddenly all the children's disappearances on the news lately come to the forefront of my brain... "Sweetheart, give a man his dues. I'm a hard working kinda guy... " I watch his gaze flicker to a door - the back door? No... The basement door, - and when a filthy smirk pulls at his mouth, my heart flies up into my throat. God, it makes me feel sick. I want to be violently ill. "My first was my adoptive Dad... pretty sick, huh?"
The fact that he didn't say anything about the basement, makes my imagination go wild. I swallow it down, though.
I just need to get out of here, and never think about this again.
And to do that I need to help Freddy get rid of this goddamn body- and... probably... testify at court... As the panic starts to finally rise up in my, right up to fill my throat, I immediately take in a deep breath and slowly let it out. "Okay... " No time to freak out. Now's the time for action.
Gaze flickering to Loretta again, I try to acclimatise to the sight. I think its a lost cause, though. "How did you get rid of him? Your Dad?"
"No, that's not gonna work. He was a drunk dead beat, and I just had to tell the police some guy's he owed money to came over to the house." Freddy grins happily at the memory, but then just as quickly, scowls at his poor deceased wife's body- that certainly cant fight back. I just tack this onto the long list of reasons I hate him. "Lore's such a goddamn goody goody- we cant do the same thing. You don't think I woulda thought of that??"
"Hey." I snap, hands braced on my hips as I flash a glare his way. "This is not the time to get defensive!"
"Whatever... "
Then- suddenly, something occurs to me. Confused, I look around; A deeply horrified feeling disturbing my stomach. "Hold on... Where's your daughter?" Seeing no sign of her anywhere, I definitely start to panic again- especially when I look to Freddy and just see a pert look in his eyes as he looks back at me, a smile that strikes something horrid inside me. My eyes narrow. "You sick fuck- where the fuck is she!??"
"Under the bed."
"What the fuck does that mean!?" I exclaim, frustrated and freaking out. He did not- he did not! Killing your spouse is one thing, but the kid?? Your own kid??
I don't wait around for him to be cryptic some more, and rush right into the house to look for her. Under the bed, under the bed, under the fucking bed...? Which fucking bed!? Forcing ferocity out of my voice, I carefully call out to Kathy. Hoping to god she answers. I try to sound normal. Maybe a little bit cheerful; Excited.
But my voice wobbles.
"Kathy?? Sweetheart, its Y/N! Are you hiding? I have something for you... " ?? You have something for her, Y/N?? God... now you have to figure out some kind of treat.
You know what? Whatever. We'll figure that out later.
Lets just hope we aren't searching for a corpse. I'd definitely be sick, seeing a child... the way Loretta is...
Shaking my head and clenching my fists, I try to focus on Kathy.
I check under the bed in the guest room because it comes into view first and she isn't there, then her bedroom and she isn't there either... and get a sick feeling as soon as I enter the last bedroom. Freddy's and Loretta's.
God, I've never been in here before but its like a museum peace now. A horrible one. Like if you would walk into the Titanic... or the Borden house.
"Kathy? You in here?" Flicking on the light I kneel down on the ground, and check under the bed.
And something immediately crashes over me, as the sight of her covering her eyes down there. It isn't exactly relief, because this whole situation is still phenomenally fucked up for her, but I am selfishly glad to not have to see her body... crumpled, just like her mother.
"Hey sweetheart," My voice quivers slightly now, but I quickly swallow. No. No. Now, you must be strong Y/N. "Its just me. Your Daddy was looking for you, and couldn't find you! It got him worried!"
"I... I don't wanna see Daddy. He hurt Mommy." Kathy doesn't remove her hands from her face, and stays firmly by the wall- too far away for anyone to grab. My heart sinks.
Slowly straightening up again, I try to take that piece of information in. Turning to the doorway, I see Freddy there. he must have followed me. I didn't even notice. Slowly, and quietly ferociously, I say; "She saw?!"
He has the good sense to look embarrassed, even if it is just to make fun of me. "It was spur of the moment... " He shrugs. "I didn't have time to get a babysitter!"
What a fucking excuse. For gods sake.
I'm definitely dealing with a psycho- if that was even a question before now.
Swiftly, I look down under the bed again, because I'm afraid that if I continue to engage with him- I'll scream, and I'll lose my breath, and I'll scare Kathy even more. She's at the forefront of my mind; That's all I can think about.
But what to do with her after I get her out from under this bed, I don't know. I cant give her back to her father... but I cant hand her over to the police either because that would involve telling them about Loretta, and... Freddy will definitely kill me, for that.
This is a nightmare of a situation.
I'm just opening my mouth to say something - what, I don't know yet, - when she speaks, instead. "Is he there?"
"... Yes." I wont lie to her; That would be treating her with not nearly as much respect as she deserves.
When she takes a deep breath and rubs her eyes, as if just trying to keep herself together, my heart clenches. God... and to think I might not have picks up Freddy's call today. I would have been leaving her with this. For the first time today, I'm morbidly glad I came.
She speaks in that loud, hissy way that kids think is a whisper. "Can he... can you please make him go away?"
Immediately I straighten back up and look to Freddy again, my eyebrows raised halfway up my forehead. Like well? "Get out."
"I don't think you're in a position to make demands here, bi- "
"Do you want Kathy to live down there now!??" I snap, trying not to be scared. Not really feeling scared, actually. Just happy to have a reason to tell him to get the hell away from me.
A deep frown creases his mouth, deeply unhappy about the situation, but steps back. I only hear him step out of the way of the door, but its good enough. Quickly, I get up and close the door - fighting with myself not to slam it, - and lock it.
Then I return to the floor, and see this time Kathy has uncovered her eyes. She looks so small, smaller then she actually is, and she looks like she's shaking. Little red bows and piggy tails in her hair are messy from crawling under the bed. "He's gone, sweetheart. And I locked the door."
She just nods, so I take the silence as a chance to offer my hand to her. "Take my hand, sweetie? Come on out from under the bed. Its cold down there, and no one wants you getting sick." I need to upkeep the family friend bit, I need to sound caring and collected. I need her to trust me.
Her big eyes, not Loretta's colour or Freddy's, look nervous as hell. And she shakes her head.
Taking a deep breath, and I conjure all the sincerity as I can. And mean it. My eyes soften and I try really hard, to resent myself as someone trustworthy- which is hard, seeing as I've never really been that. I mean, I'm cheating on my husband. I told Carter today the same lie I told Harrison when i knew I was going to be late. The only person I think who knows the truth behind all my lies is Freddy. That says something about a person, that the only person who knows them is a psychopath.
But I want to, I need to, be good for this little girl. And there's no time for me turn my life around so it has to start with this. How fucked is that?
"... I promise, I'll take care of you. He wont hurt you."
After a few whole minutes, in which I stay silent because yes she's a child, but she's still thinking, she crawls over and takes my hand, letting me lead her out. Crawling into my lap as I cross my legs under her, she buries her face in my shirt- hiding. "You promise?"
Taking a deep breath, because I've really done it now, I offer my pinky for her to see if she turned her head. I know Freddy's listening to all of this through the wall, but I try not to freak out. "Pinky swear?"
"Pinky swear." She peaks out from my shirt, and curls her little finger around mine. Okay... "Y/N... I'm scared."
"Yeah... Me too, sweetie."
What am I going to do?
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aliensunflower-fics · 3 years
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In Defense of Salt AND Sugar: Aka ML Fandom pls chill out.
So I don’t talk much as those who follow me will say I tend to just stick to myself and my own things. HOWEVER, Ive gotten a lot of asks about why I write both Salt and Sugar for Miraculous Ladybug.
The short answer: Both salt and sugar are valid, fun, intriguing things to read and write and the point of writing is to entertain and be entertained.
The long answer: Salt isn’t inherently someone hating on your fav show and sugar isn't someone necessarily giving it a free pass either. Ya’ll are just dramatic as hell.
The LONGER answer:
I write salt because I LIKE Miraculous Ladybug, BUT the show has not lived up to its potential AT ALL. The show could be so much better and the characters are so flawed or full of holes that occasionally I feel FRUSTRATED and mad!
I hate that Alya a character who I was so excited about, gets shafted ignored, sidelined, or written like a jerk! She could have been this great detective working alongside her friend to unmask the villain, but instead she often comes across as pushy, obsessed with Ladynoir or Adrinette, and so damn easily tricked. Not to mention how when shes not gushing over her ‘ships’ shes pushed to the side and ignored. [or you know... LILA]
I hate that Marinette’s crush makes her do things that are so cringy and awkward i feel ill I hate that she’s constantly the only one making mistakes and ‘learning lessons’ when the show has all these other great characters that could use the spotlight and be the ones learning lessons. I hate that she’s so jealous and that she cant ever seem to catch a break as if the show is punishing her constantly.
I HATE that Adrien is a mary sue, how the writers say hes perfect and treat him as such, I hate that he gets to guilt Marinette into fixing everything and dealing with bullies, I wanted a funny, Ron Stoppable, naive boy who learns about real friendships and grows into a great partner. Instead he gets to be pushy and downright a jerk as Chat Noir ignoring his responsibilities, guilting Ladybug with his feelings, never taking no as an answer. He’s not a good role model for kids.
I hate that Chloe got built up to have a redemption arc several times only for the writers to decide that Chloe a teenage girl who needs some serious therapy [and actual reasonable punishment for her actions] is worse than Gabriel child abuse Agreste. She could have been a great lesson on compassion and growth and dealing with your own pain without hurting others. Instead the writers wrote her off completely.
And dont get me started on how the show treats Nino, Kagami, Luka and the rest of the cast. They may as well be a backdrop for the forced love square that we NEVER get a break from. Seriously I’m a sucker for romance but does it need to be EVERY damn episode?! Can’t we just get some wholesome friendship between everyone including Adrien and Marinette at this point like COME ON.
And i’m not even touching on the white washing, awful lessons on responsibility and forgiveness, awful lessons on well so much other stuff really, the guilt trips, the teacher, the fact that she show could be used to teach kids how to better handle negative emotions and the importance of open communication and not keeping quiet about injustice and/or your feelings but instead decided that the main priority should be a love square that gets force fed to us EVERY SINGLE EPISODE.
My point is the show has FLAWS. That doesn’t mean its the worse show ever and it doesn’t mean its not fun, and has a great premise and characters, and so when I write Salt I write it because i’m frustrated! Im frustrated with the show, with the characters, with the writing and so I vent that out with salt I write those characters as their worst selves because I cant stand how the show has decided to treat them and Im ANGRY and disappointed.
It feels good to write salt and to read it. It’s nice to see characters get called out for bad behavior, its nice to read about Adrien not getting the girl. Its nice to occasionally indulge in salt because it validates that the show is flawed and lets you get out that frustration.
BUT ON THE FLIP SIDE
Miraculous Ladybug is a lovely show. It’s a show that decided to give little girls a FEMALE HERO. And not just as a side kick or background character! No they made her the protagonist! Its so important to me that little girls see good well rounded female characters in media.
And even if the show is clumsy about it they are TRYING to build an expansive lore that tickles the theorist brain. And gets people invested in the world.
The show also made Marinette shy, and awkward, and clumsy something a lot of girls deal with during puberty as growing up can literally make you clumsier as your body adjusts. Having a character who tries to be positive and tries to find solutions who solves things with creativity instead of pure violence. Thats LOVELY for young girls to see.
Growing up I loved and admired Kim Possible, and probably would have loved Marinette, even if the shows not perfect I can admit its trying and I can see why people love it as much as they do! And why they write these fluffy sugary fics its the reason I WRITE fluffy sugary things.
Because even though I am frustrated and angry and disappointed with the show, I still see Alya’s potential and how great she is as representation to little girls who want a black female superhero so I write fluff where Alya’s loyalty, compassion, cleverness and her pursuit of justice are center stage.
I see how Adrien could be better and I want him to be better and I WANT him to be the naive funny comic relief the Ron Stoppable to Marinette’s Kim Possible. I want Adrien to grow and learn and spit in his dad’s face I want him to overcome the abuse and be happy. To show people that neglect and abuse doesn’t mean you will get stuck like that forever, that you can overcome that and be a better kinder person.
I want Nino and Kagami, and Luka and Chloe and the class to grow and get attention and have funny moments I want to laugh and make other people laugh! So I write prompts focused around comedy and shenanigans and where the characters get to be fun and silly and make decisions for themselves!
SO IN CONCLUSION:
I write salt AND sugar. I see the value and merit in both sides of the coin, and I respect how other people see the show. I know its easy to get angry with other people in the fandom who see the show differently then you do but please can we put down the weapons and just BREATHE.
Someone who writes salt might LOVE the same show as you, and they might in fact love it so much that they vent their frustrations in angst and salt and cracky fics. Let them vent about how they wish the show was better, leave their tags alone or block them if you cant stand to see it. But dont attack salt writers for ‘hating on your show’ when they might love it just as much as you do but want a way to vent out their feelings.
On the flip someone who writes sugar might NOT be forgiving the show for its flaws, they might see all the same flaws as you but decide to take that frustration and write fluff and fix it fics and sugar because they want to indulge in a version of their favorite show where everything is just... OK. Where everyone is well written and happy and the character development sticks. Stay out of their tags let them have their sugar, they aren't writing it to hurt you just like you don't write salt to hurt them.
So ENOUGH. Enough hunting each other down, enough sending each other hate, enough filling each others tags. Let people write SALT if they feel angry and vengeful and disappointment, let them have their tags, let them explore the dark side of the characters, let them rant and rave and be HURT when the characters they love upset them with their actions. Its not your place to tell them to stop, to tell them their feelings are invalid, to tell them that ‘adrien is sweet sunshine boy how dare you’ or ‘alya would never’ or ‘i hate your marinette leaves dupont au’. Just leave it be, heed the tags, and let it go.
AND ENOUGH. Enough hunting each other down, enough sending each other hate, enough filling each other tags. Let people write SUGAR if they just want something to feel happy about. Let them makes coffee shop au’s, let them make fix it fics where everything is just happy without needing 8 pages of backstory for why everything is just happy. Let them squeal and gush and talk about the ship they like and the fluff they see. Its not your place to argue with them that the show is flawed, its not cool to ruin their fun by accusing them of not understanding the flaws, to tell them ‘umm actual this character shouldn’t get to be happy’ or ‘wow this is so shallow’. Just leave it be, heed the tags, and let it go.
PS: Now with that said and done. I do have one final message for everyone - If you write/enjoy pedophilia, if you sexualize KIDS. Then get the fuck out of fandom spaces, stop fucking following me, and do everyone salt and sugar a favor by LEAVING. Your pedophilia and child sexualization aint wanted, aint ok, and I will fight you.
PSS: IF YOU HATE WHAT IVE SAID ABOUT SUGAR AND SALT FINE OK I RESPECT YOU REGARDLESS. ENJOY THE SHOW, STAY CLASSY, DONT HURT PEOPLE BECAUSE THEY HAVE A DIFFERENT OPINION.
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