#why cant he stop thinking about that confession. what are these emotions. i mean its not as if hes in love with Ohhhhhh No. Oh No. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

demadogs · 2 years

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Hey! So I saw in a recent ask you said about how mike doesn't show eleven he loves her through actions, m!levens seem to claim and I would like to hear more thoughts on that, because that's just interesting, if you would be willing to share

I hope you have a good day!

yeah so what got me thinking about this was a gifset of a bunch of m!leven moments of mikes actions and what he says to el and i was looking through the comments and they were all like “actions are his love language!! hes just an awkward kid thats bad with words!” and its not so much that those actions cant depict love, its just that theres usually something so much bigger and louder for byler that theyre choosing to ignore or mike does something after one of those moments that negates one of the moments theyre talking about.

one example of them hyping up a mlvn moment and ignoring a bigger byler moment is “youre the most important thing to me in the world” compared to “it was the best thing ive ever done”. those are technically dialogue not actions but its the way theyre delivered.

mike says els the most important thing to him during the sauna test episode. he says it when he’s trying to explain himself to el and why he lied to her and how hopper was making him stay away from her. he says this line so casually in an attempt to get her back and el completely ignores it and says that hopper was right to keep him away. its not even a “moment” its just a line and its not given any attention at all. i didnt even know what melvns were referring to at first because it wasnt set up to be a memorable and impactful sentence. its literally completely ignored.

meanwhile “it was the best thing ive ever done” is a tearful confession of mike telling will that the best decision of his life was befriending him in kindergarten. it’s an entire monologue, not just a line thrown into an argument. he’s crying. the lighting and mood is very dramatic meant to show so much emotion. it’s not a scene or a line you forget about, whether youre into byler or not. i cant believe how much melvns defend their ship with that line when this line is clearly meant to be more important. i also think its interesting that he described el as a “thing” but here he only describes the action of asking will to be his friend as a “thing”. as if el is kinda this material accessory rather than his girlfriend. why didnt he just say “person”? he does in s4 when he says “youre the most incredible person in the world” but that sentence doesnt include what she is and what she means to him.

another thing they hype up that has a byler related argument is mike calling her everyday for 353 days. he doesnt continue calling her everyday in s2. he stopped when will was in danger because he was more concerned about him than el. i also wanna say that doing this isnt necessarily romantic by default. if nancy had never gotten confirmation that barb died i wouldnt put it past her to do something like this as well. when s2 picks up its a year later and shes still grieving a lot and she and jonathan go all the way to murrays to give barb’s family and nancy too some closure for her death.

something that they hype up that is negated by something else mike does is the cabin “i love her and i cant lose her again” line. that lines not so powerful when he cant say it to her face. hes said it out loud before, the only explanation for why he cant say it to her face now and even then at the end of s3 is because he knows its not true. and now he wont even say it to anyone else either. he could have told will that “that thing” he didnt say was that he loves her but he didnt. and as el said, he cant even write it. he doesnt love her.

and heres some more negative melvn actions that they refuse to acknowledge

mike wont let her touch him when they kiss. he even stops the kiss intentionally to sing.

when mike was biking to the movie theater and talking to el saying he’d see her tomorrow, el was obviously way more excited than he was.

he didnt try to apologize to her right after their fight/break up. he did with will. in the pouring rain.

he doesnt kiss her back in the last episode of s3 and he looks very confused after.

hes not nearly as excited as el is at the airport. hes not even looking at her while theyre walking together. same with at the rink.

and as for byler:

he looks at his lips at the movie theater. when have we ever seen something like that with mike and el?

stayed with mike for like 2 whole days when he was flayed in s2. he literally never left his side until they went to hops cabin.

hes a lot softer with will when el isnt there. this goes for s2 and s4. without the distraction of needed to play the Straight Boyfriend role he’s just nice and sweet with will instead of being an asshole like he was at the beginning of this season and in s3. the moment el leaves mike tells him that he felt like he lost him and they work better as a team.

in conclusion: mike gay. happy pride.

#jesus this is long #stranger things #byler #i dont have a tag or asks that arent anon…. probably shoulda made my ask tag something different #too late now

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lolotheparagon · 1 year

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How Parfait and Florabelle Became Girlfriends

One day, before Tombsteel and the Ironites came to Prettiopia, Florabelle invited Parfait to visit a field covered in roses. When Parfait asked why, Flora reveals she planted this entire field just for her and gives Parfait one of the roses to keep. Overcome with emotion, Parfait broke down crying. She tearily replied how she cant accept this because she doesnt deserve such a gift and that she feels she's a barely qualified princess. Florabelle had noticed her best friend's self deprecation but she never got the full story of why shes like this. So Flora presses her for answers on why she feels so negatively about herself all the time, Parfait confessed that ever since her mother died, she always felt like a burden. Here's some of the dialogue:

Parfait stared at Flora's saddened expression and stood there in fear and unease. She mustered up enough courage to tell her friend why she couldnt accept this lovely gift:

Papa wants me to be like mom. She was graceful, demure, delicate, a storybook queen. But no matter how hard I try, I can't be like her. So I try to be myself, but even thats not good enough. said Parfait, struggling to hide the tears in her eyes.

Why cant you tell your dad to stop pressuring you to be a certain way. Florabelle replied, increasingly worried for her best friend's uneased state.

He's probably just preparing me for the job. Dad just wants whats best for me. He said it himself, he thinks i have potential to be queen someday. But until then, I have to make him proud. I have to... I owe it to him. said Parfait.

Do you really? Florabelle questioned.

I want to...He's the only family i have. A-aand he's sick... Parfait answered, slightly quivering in fear and voice cracking under the pressure of the words she just spoke.

Yeah... its a difficult situation. But still you shouldnt put so much pressure on yourself.

Flo, I have to prove I can be a competent leader in my dad's absence. I cant just dance around, hang out with friends and party... Which means I have to put my own feelings aside. My own happiness. Everyone loves me and thinks im the best... But I'm not... i'm so used to giving and being kind to others. Parfait remarked.

But what about being kind to yourself. Flora noted back

Cos its selfish. said Parfait.

No. There's a difference. Florabelle curtly replied, her paws on Parfait's shoulders.

Not to me, there isnt. Flo, you put so much effort, love and care into all this but its not my birthday, Papa's birthday or the Prettiopia's founder's anniversary. This flower, this field... I cant have this. Parfait replied with dread and guilt.

Why? We're best friends, we can give gifts to each other anytime

Exactly! Because its from you, its special. Its meaningful. You know how much I love roses and you planted a whole field of them! If it was Rags giving me a spinning top or something, thats one thing. But youve made me something special. So special that I cant have it. said Parfait.

Why? replied Florabelle

Cos I can't, okay? said Parfait.

WHY?? said Florabelle, raising her voice slightly.

BECAUSE IM NOT WORTHY OF THIS!!" Parfait yells, tears streaming down her face.

All I'm worthy for is for throwing parties, making people laugh, hosting ceremonies and festivals, BIG events. All my life, Dad never thought i would amount to anything but now that im being regent in his place, it's my chance to finally prove I can be the heir he's always dreamed of and...the daughter he wants to love... Parfait confessed, now turning away to stop Flora seeing her in this embarrassing state.

Fayfay... Florabelle whispered sympathetically.

So, please, Flo. I cant accept this... please dont hate me... said Parfait, tears clouding her vision, as she gives back the rose. After a moment of silence with Parfait's barely audible sobbing, Flora grabs Parfait's paw and puts the rose back. Parfait looks up, confused and afraid, Flora rushes in to give her a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Flo? Parfait questioned, confused.

I love you. replied Florabelle

Oh. Oh sprinkles... y-you do?? said Parfait, now blushing like an apple. She never realised her best friend had feelings for her. In hindsight, she shouldve seen that coming.

Heehee, for a while. answered Florabelle.

Oh, i feel stupid now. Why didnt I see the signs? said Parfait.

Fay, even future queens cant read minds. replied Florabelle

The girls laugh.

Listen I dont know whats going on inside your head or what your dad's like, but I want to be there for you. Florabelle declared, holding Parfait's paws.

Flo... Me too. said Parfait, before she knew it, a warm relaxed smile stretched across her face, causing Flora to smile back.

What are ya smiling for? said Parfait.

This is the first time I ever see you smile like that. Whenever you're on stage or hosting a party, you smile all the time. But this one you got on? I want to see that smile more often, if thats okay with you. said Florabelle.

Fine with me, girlfriend. Parfait replied, beaming with joy.

Florabelle and Parfait both clip on roses on their dresses, symbolising their love for each other and hold hands as they walk and laugh into the horizon.

-----------

#oc stuff #original character #star cross warriors #parfait #florabelle #oc story

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candiliam328 · 3 months

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✨ Bean's Top Five Song Discoveries of 2023 ✨

yes i realize it is already well into january 2024 but here, enjoy the songs i found this year that define my 2023. if you're new here, hi i used to make obsessive music posts but now dont have time to make full ones so take this instead: your very own unique insight to my 2023!

this post is dedicated to @disco-tea for somehow being invested in all my music adventures and obsessions, bestie ily 🥺💕

STOP (Lollapalooza Version) by j-hope (Eng. translation // Performance w/ Eng. sub)

im totally cheating already by choosing this when i first listened to jitb in 2022. but honestly? i dont care. i saw hobipalooza for the first time in 2023 and this version was only officially released then so here it is now!

to be frank, watching the performance was a completely different experience to me compared to listening to the studio release. while the original recording sounded conversational, it felt like something was exploding out of him during this performance. he needed to get things off his chest and yet still barely stops himself in his tracks from spiralling. and the juxtaposition !! placing it right after Equal Sign, where he is preaching kindness and understanding and unity and even goes so far to say "it costs you nothing to be kind" ?? and then the sudden immediate whiplash into STOP where he is actively holding himself back because its not true! being kind is hard!!! but he wants to be understanding and practice what he preaches but even he fails and gets "contaminated by the viruses" sometimes. its hard, its real, its raw. and ugh !! this song !!!

Bonus: the moment I always start to lose my mind

its the way the alternate title to this song is "there are no bad people in the world," a belief he holds deep to his core. and yet only a few breaths later, he confesses that the reality of the world makes him question if people are even human anymore. 😩 like wtf-

but also. its so true. and relatable. sometimes i cant even look at the news anymore bc its so hard to be a hopeful and positive and good person when you are bombarded with only hate and tragedy. i have never seen that feeling captured so perfectly in a song. jung hoseok you king.

tldr i think about this song, its performance juxtaposition, and what it means way too often. eternally sad that the youtube video with eng subs playing those songs back to back got taken down, i rewatched it so much it haunts me. may we never ever forget hobipalooza bc jung hoseok made Choices !!

Don't Wanna Cry by Seventeen (Eng. translation // Performance w/ Eng. sub in captions)

the real ones remember how j-hope took over my life that second half of 2022 and how much i fought tooth and nail the entire way... so yeah lol seventeen took over the second half of 2023 and this is the song that got me out of that denial.

the thing is. i had kept hearing about this song and this choreography and how iconic it was, which is why i avoided it for so long. but as we all know, no matter how much i joke, i am and always will be a dancer. dancing will always be in my blood. so it is very on brand that a good dancer has been what gets me into kpop groups 100% of the time (2 out of 2 groups stanned bc i fell for the main dancer 🫣). and as a choreographer, good choreo will always have an unreasonable chokehold on me. and yet, Don't Wanna Cry has the audacity to exist ?? featuring performance unit leader hoshi with his most masterful choreography for this heartbreaking song ?? come onnn, i had no chance.

i cant say anything about this choreo that hasnt been said before but like seriously, watch this practice video and tell me this choreo isnt one of the most in-sync yet emotionally effective pieces of art you've ever seen. You don't even need the translations to understand the emotions behind it. But when I first saw the lyrics with the choreography, I swear I got chills. Ironically, once DK sang out this line:

my eyes got blurry. because thats the whole point of the song isn't it? thats the whole reason why they dont want to cry. because they realize their time together is limited, their heart is breaking but each second in their presence is so beautiful and precious, how dare tears get in the way of fully appreciating this time together. its beautiful and heartbreaking and then the timing of falling to their knees right after for a chorus just adds into the hopelessness.

And I know everyone talks about the bridge but like- the bridge.

Lying to yourself that everything is OK only to fall on your knees again begging "come back, come back, come back". The rawness in this choreo. The almost uncontrollable chest pops in this vulnerable, open position because these words are coming from their heart.

Also Hoshi still to this day calls this one of his favorite svt choreos. He doesn't brag much about his choreo nowadays but the interviews I could find of him proudly relaying the story behind the iconic "streetlight" choreo just 🥺🥺 me too buddy. choreo can be beautiful sometimes and he did so good with this one. 🥺🥺🥺 choreographer hoshi, king of my heart, thank you for making me fall in love with this song 🥺🙌

I'm Just Another Person Oh God by Daisy the Great (lyrics)

Ah, yes. the Daisy the Great phase. I could have picked the whole All You Need is Time album honestly bc the storyline it has in my head is so fucked up I can't handle it. But in the end, it was a toss up between including this one or Aluminum in this list bc those were the ones I had on loop. for. reasons. 🫣

Gosh, what to say about this song. other than admitting, wow was I going through something for this one. Haven't we all felt this way sometimes though? Wanting something so bad and it not working out and then stepping back like. "wait am i being greedy and selfish with this?" and the answer is no! like actually im just being entirely super normal with this. just like everyone else! only i am also filled with some bonus woe! like ?!??!?! wasnt that the biggest 2023 mood? idk it was for me lmao.

There is something to be said with this album though, that is particularly apparent in this song. It's that kind of cynical wistfulness of wanting something you had in the past. Passion? Naivete? Whatever it is. It's gone now bc of life, the passage of time, and you're being like so super brave and normal about it (clenched fist, arthur meme style). Everything is painted with a bit of regret and "why am i always like this", all wrapped up in a funky floaty song that is almost uncomfortably easy to listen and vibe to bc of how concerning those lyrics can be when you really listen. but hey ✌️ it really do be like that sometimes i guess. shoutout to them for the insane 20yearold something vibes bc daisy the great? they get it ahaha.

Snow on Tha Bluff by J. Cole (lyrics)

Lol surprise.

if you ever want to know how i find music, a lot of my favorite songs are usually found by chance. a random deep dive fueled by curiosity or hyperfixation and every so often, my spotify will give me a gem. this particular discovery was bc for a variety of reasons, i decided to listen to a playlist of j.cole's music and was bopping along appropriately until this one came up and. i had to replay it multiple times.

its very understated. and raw. stream-of-consciousness.

i dont even know but i listened to this one a lot. even as i write this now, its been months since i listened to it but when i was making this list, i knew i had to include this one bc of how much ive thought about it.

there's something about understated vulnerability that always gets me in. nothing about this is showy nor does it really seem to have a point other than him needing to get this off his chest. yet there's such a poignant art to it. the instance he speaks about is v specific but the sentiment is still relatable and somehow resonated with me a lot.

idk i just think this song is so beautiful in its simplicity, which is something i think i should try to emulate more considering i said a whole lot of nothing in this section so i think ill stop this one here.

I Don't Understand But I Luv U by Seventeen (Eng. Lyrics)

if i had to pick a song that defined my december, it would be this one. hands down, no contest. i think i listened to this nonstop the last two weeks of the year. and:

... yeah.

im realizing as i write this post that i spent a lot of this past year just thinking about music and life. seventeen's songs actually tend to be a bit of a slow burn on me so i had known and even heard this song a few times earlier this year but really it only hit me last month. yet despite listening to it nonstop, i cannot recite to you the actual english translation of the song. bc ultimately the translation doesnt matter. what i love about this song is already there in the title.

"I don't understand but I love you"

after all, isnt that love in its truest essense? love is accepting you may never truly understand everything about a person but choosing to love them anyway. love transcends all language and all understanding. its a choice and an action and this is the song that always reminds me of that when love gets hard.

idk what this all says about my 2023 but love is hard. family is hard. but in a way, i think that's what makes it all so beautiful. just as beautiful as this song. i can and will (and have!) listened to this song on repeat bc the ✨vibes✨ i think it might even have been the first song i listened to in 2024. that guitar riff is so sick and sensual. the ad libs are so cute - the little zoom! at 0:46 and smoke smoke! at 2:02, i sing along to it every time 🫣.

also hearing the girlies lose their minds when watching this performance on the big screen during their simulcast concert was so funny but endearing. i'd never but those girls sure love thirst traps skakakka

the story behind this song too just 🥺 hoshi getting absolutely blown by a fan's comment "i dont understand but i love you," repeating it, saying they could use it as part of their lyrics and then a few months later, this song comes out. you can literally see his eyes light up im just 🥺 so endeared. and the way its a Performance Unit song, a unit that is made of 50% foreign members, and that several pre-debut clips show members struggling with language barriers. idk this song is all so soft, it means so much to me and clearly means so much to them. and there we go, its all in the title for me ✨

✨ if you made it all the way here, wow and thanks! here's to even more good music in 2024 ✨

#this was actually so much fun #and a great way to reflect on my year #2023 was an interesting one for sure 👀#hope ill be able to do something like this again in december!!#i miss making music posts #/ making posts in general lmao #my ramblings #personal #musical beans #yay! i finally spat this bby out. its been in the drafts for so long

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alexinity · 2 years

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someone specific

albedo x gn reader

tw: none

-this is kinda short and boring but it was in my drafts for a few months so i decided to get rid of it finally, albedo might be a little off character idk

[albedo confesses his feelings, talks abt the future and his fears, a little comfort?]

•

you and albedo were sitting on the grass near dragonspine, where the cold couldnt reach, yet the sun couldnt touch.

you were laying on the grass in deep silence, not an uncomfortable one but still in the nice company of your friend.

"have you ever thought about the future?" albedo randomly asked

"of course i have.. why do you ask?" you turned your head towards him and looked at his back

"i was just wondering..do you think if we already have a destined future, that a single moment can completely change it?" he was staring into the distance.

"hm..perhaps..the future is something that changes all the time and even a single decision can lead it towards a very different way. our fates change everyday with every little thing we say and do. this is how i imagine it... kind of like the butterfly effect, dont you think?" you said with a small smile.

albedo felt his cheeks turn slightly red. he loved the way they answered his questions, maybe thats why he always seemed to try to find something new to ask you

"maybe you are right..." he said while turning the other way again

"you seem bothered? is something wrong? you never really care about things that arent happening in the moment, let alone something so distant like the future." y/n got closer to albedo and gently placed their hand on his shoulder.

"true but.. recently ive been trying to get something out of my mind, no matter what i do nothing seems to be working out"

"well its new to see you worried about anything at all, you can tell me.." a few seconds passes before albedo sighed and lowered his head a little

"how do i say this...well.. i was just wondering if what im doing, my dedication, all my researches, all my creations...if they will eventually lose their meanings when in the end of the day i will still be alone like ive always been, i will lose control and.." he didn't dare look at them.

"albedo..." albedo had told them a long time ago what his life purpose was, they knew what he was capable of

"leave it..i shouldn't think about it now" he felt embarrassed. he didnt understand emotions as much as he wanted to, he knew that in order to not feel lonely he had to be around people and that seemed like the hardest part

the only person he always wanted to be around was you

he knew you were a busy person, always going around helping others, caring about everyone, you had your own worries and problems, he knew the fact that you were there with him right now was too much to ask for. why would you care about someone like him anyway? he wanted to be selfsh for once, take you away from all of your responsibilities for a day and spend moments like this more often

"do you often feel lonely?" y/n took albedo back to reality with their question

"sometimes"

"then why do you always stay here - alone. If you really didnt want to be alone you would be doing all your researches in Mond.. in your lab."

"you are right..i dont seek the company of other people, i tend to avoid everyone as much as i could, in dragonspine i feel.. save...i am perfectly fine by myself here, but i do seek the company of someone specific sometimes, its distracting me from my job, makes me feel vulnerable.." He turned his gaze towards you. he felt his breath hitch as he was staring at your confused expression. should he really be doing this?

"and who that might be?" oh how u loved to act dumb he thought

archons you were doing to kill him. why do you always have to do this? you never seemed to notice how much effect you have on the alchemist

his hands trembled

"you"

perhaps one day..when he loses control, when he cant hold back and think straight..perhaps you will be there to stop him and bring his mind to peace again

#albedo confessing #albedo x reader #genshin impact imagines #albedo kreideprinz #i kin albedo ok #this is so off character i suck at writing #genshin x reader #genshin impact #albedo imagines

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bmpmp3 · 2 years

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JUST finished heishi’s route in norn9 hold on i wanna talk about whatever i just witnessed (also might have spoilers for kakeru and senri since those are the other two ive finished) (also also spoilers for amnesia memories because i always wanna talk about amnesia memories)

SO LIKE ive been playing norn9 in the slowest way humanly possible (started in 2017 and im three routes down half a decade later LOL not a bad game tho!! the soundtrack is fantastic and the comedy writing is really great even if the plot stuff so far feels a little disjointed, its just a 9 love interest game is a little overwhelming hfjdksjsfkdls) and like i have a tendency to take several month long breaks between routes as well as whatever my brain decides is a natural stopping point and last time i played heishi’s route was like. some time last year. i was unmedicated at the time so i dont remember where exactly but it was like JUST before his first attempt at a confession on the top floor/roof thing of the orb they live on, and like

i think ive mentioned before how while ive heard that Toma’s behaviour is explained in the amnesia fandiscs as his mild possessiveness being amplified by time loop wackiness, i still choose to believe he’s just Like That because i think its hilarious to add just one more strange incongruous thing to a simultaneous grounded and out there game like amnesia (like how mathematicians in this universe seem to wear a lot of belts????????). well ive decided in my head to view heishi’s route as the opposite HJFJDhjlkfdssjflkd

like RIGHT after he got his confession wiped from his memory by nanami to stop ron from shooting him, he got like WACKY like it felt like i was playing a different route with a different guy and i dunno about the fandiscs yet but in game its explained as heishi losing control over the emotions he’s been suppressing because he’s in love and stressed out but I CHOOSE to believe that the mind wipes scrambled his brain because i like. the speculative fiction implications of that JKDLSDJs

girl his bad end. girl oh my god. girl what WAS that like seriously i havent been this caught off guard by otome game love interest since I first started playing them and got Toma’d, like GIRL oh my god

the other bad ends i played werent quite this level like kakeru’s had him getting wacky cause of his mind control earring which was nuts and i loved it but it like. was foreshadowed. and i dont remember senri’s bad ending at all (as forementioned i was unmedicated while finishing it so i dont remember everything orz i do remember natsuhiko being like ‘jesus christ is that a fucking gremlin” every time he saw him tho which was hilarious) but i cant imagine it was that nuts, but girl. oh my god

everyone always talks about ron (haven’t gotten to him yet but like. looking at him in other routes i can guess how he’s gonna be. which is kind of a shame and why i dont really care for the yandere routes being obvious LOL like okay the sketchy amoral guy is sketchy and amoral. who coulda guess. im being mean sorry i think i just love wild shit happening in otome games, i just think itd be really funny if instead of being fucked up, after all his behaviour in other routes, ron was just like a normal dude in his own. keep my on my toes otome games) but i hadnt heard a LICK about heishi. actually maybe thats why it worked so well... i was so prepared for whatever’s gonna go on with ron that i let my guard down with heishi fsjkldkfjsd

gonna be like 28-53 business days until i play another route but im gonna do akito next, hope he’s normal, koharu had a reasonable time with kakeru and a great time with senri yet nanami can’t seem to catch a break orz praying for her

#i originally set a rule for myself not to start any more otome games until i finish this one #i have a habit of setting that rule with lots of video game genres and mediums #but i think im starting to embrace that maybe i dont work that way. maybe i need to switch things up often #like im 3/4s of the way through 12 jrpgs rn and maybe thats just the way i thrive #so im gonna let myself take breaks as i need them (especially with denser games lkie norn9...9 entire dudes to keep track of)#what otome game should i play in between. maybe something shorter. maybe i'll catch up on the ikesen routes or play a voltage story #i love starting video games and not finishing them for a decade

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meichifulifejourney · 3 months

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Here's a confension.

Dear you,

If your reading this then it means two things, Posting scheduled post from tumblr to Facebook is still a thing or because I'm already dead and doens't have the ability to delete this.

When I was a teenager, i had a talked with a counselor at school I remember she said to write down my emotions, write down whats on your head, let the pen speak what your lips cant utter so Im now writing this.

If your reading this dont tell my parents.

Dont tell the police its too late for that. As an adult I know these facts now. All i want is for someone to know why Im fucked up in the head.

(Because Adults failed me. Adults failed to protect a child like me.)

The Year is 2014 and I have a confession to make.

What is home? Where is home?

I'm not sure if its just me but when i try to remember my childhood the first memory i have is from the time my Parents told me i would be living with my grandparents. As a child i don't fully understand it my lolo and lola lives just next door but i do feel excited. You see my grandparents house is so big (on a kid perspective) they have a huge garage that can fit two jeepney and a tricycle, its up and down, their kitchen has this amazing round table where the top part has a little round thing that can rotate so you could get the food that you want. They have their own garden and balcony.

My first thought is i have a big playing space, our house is small and we only have one bedroom where we all sleep together. What I didn't know is this is where all my abandoment issue will start.

At first I didn't think about it but as days turns to weeks and months I started to get the feeling of loneliness, I'm showered with a lot of things, new clothes, new shoes and delicous food but all of this is topped with loneliness.

I envy my cousins who also lives there, they have their parents to care for them, Lola have to always asked one of my Aunts to tie my hair for school, or asked them to go with me so I could buy shoes. Later on I've learned that my Parents income is not enough to raise all three of their kids together and my mom said she's having a hard time taking care of three kids at the same time. So they choose me out of all three children to be raised by my lola for the reason that I'am the eldest and I would understand that my needs is far less than the needs of my younger brothers.

For them, the time I spent there is just brief but its long enough for me to crave the love and care of what having true parents meant.

They take me back when Papa's income become much stable, when mama is able to put up a small business, they take me back because back then its time for me to help them raise my siblings.

You see my parents are good people, surrounded by good friends. It came to the point that I found these friends so good, Good enough to let me think that it is okay to get sexually abused by them. First it was my godfather, he always call me pretty and touch different parts of my body, Have you imagined being a 5 year old and had someone fingers between your thighs? He said he was giving you pleasure but you don't understand it, you don't understand why you have to put your pants down or why he asked you to lift your shirt.

It happened for a while until suddenly he stops visiting when my parents are not around. Why didn't I tell the adults about it? Cause i'm an invisible kid around them. No one pays attention to me they only see me if they need to ask me to help them with something.

The second assult happen when im alone at home, I remember this because I have fever and my family has to be somewhere for a while. This person is one of my brothers god father. You see I knew these people and they spend time in our house.

I remember him asking me if I ever have a first kiss. Im just 9 that time. I shake my head no because I know kissing your parents is not counted as first kiss. I learned how to kiss at the age of 9 with me sitting with my assailant lap with his hands roaming around my small body. I dont understand it but the sensation is good. Growing up I realize that its because im slowly becoming a teenager that time and my body is developing hormones.

I had my first sex at our home bathroom where he asked me to stand on our toilet seat it was painful and his not even pushing himself in just the tip. I didn't cry, I didn't say anything because he told me he will kill me if i did, he told me that no one should know or they will get disappointed at me. It continue like that for I think about a year, he knows my parents schedules and go there everytime they are not around.

The third sexual assault happens when Im playing with two of my teenage boys cousins. You see, my parents told me not to go outside, I have to stay indoors with my siblings so when they asked me to play house with them i agree.

You guess it right, Im the wife. You see I have been sexually abuse twice that I already think that when a man tried to put his penis out in front of you its normal. They asked me to lay on the bed. I remember it so clearly like it just happened, Put your clothes up, pull your panty down. Imagine two people masterbating infront of a kid rubbed of her innocence, spread your legs april. Yan ganyan. I got used to following orders because i was asked to always keep it quiet. Always listen to the adults because thats the right thing to do.

I remember one of them laying on top of me with me still holding my shirt up and not making a sound, I remember being dry hump he has his pants back on but keeps rubbing his sex on me.

My fifth sexual abuse happens when I was 11, My cousin whose age is as same as me asked me to put my shorts down. At this point I know what he wants I really thought that its normal so we hide in the garden me against the wall and him rubbing his sex on me. This is the first time that I've realized that this is not normal, An adult caught us. I was emotionless. As a kid im always like that I always have these poker face and the only indications of my emotions Is when my face is red and there are tears in my eyes.

You think that by this time, finally these assaults will comes to an end? What a joke. I got the blame. The adult caught us and told me "malandi ka" I was the one getting fantasized, abused but I got the blame. That time I know that adults are worthless scumbags that in this world I only have myself.

I was powerless.

When I started grade six, I was yet again force to live with another relatives, Their house is near my school so It saving us tons of money and time. I live there until third year highschool. If you think that getting abused stopped when i live there? You thought it wrong.

I'm a growing teenager, one night when I was sleeping one of my uncle enters the room. I remember pretending to be asleep as he touch my breast. The room is shared and so it only happens once.

At that point I was asking myself, what is home? Where Is home? Is there a place for me to be safe? Is it a curse or a blessing to be a woman?

Fourth year highschool when i got back to live with my parents again. This time my assailant is one of my brother.

Our home is still small and we still share a bedroom. I was sleeping and I woke up with my pants getting pulled down my legs being pushed apart and him on top of me. This time i fought and pushed him then I talked to my parents about it.

They didn't do anything, They said they talked to him and asked him what happened. Guess who got the blamed. ME apparently i seduced him. I allowed him to be in my personal space.

I experience all of these because Im a woman, because being pretty is a curse, and because Im a woman subject to the desire of men.

Fuck the adults, they don't know whats going on my head. If this post made it to you then my depression got the best of me, or I was still alive but forgot all about this.

In this world, I learned that I am alone. But then i still have a tiny hope in my heart that someone out there still wants to take care of me, I can't help but imagine, would there be a time I would ask someone to stay the night with me? would I asked someone not to leave me? Would i be able to asked someone not to take me home and run away with me?

Sometimes I wonder if there are still arms i want my body to be wrapped around. Sometimes I wonder if anyone would listen, would anyone be out there would tell me that I'm strong, that I'm worth all the stress that I might give them because I know that when I found someone whom I feel safe I would call them my home, i would want to spend day and night with them because their arms makes me feel home, safe and a place where i could lay down my burdens.

Would that person exsist? I hope you do. And If im still alive 10 years after I wrote this then please help me. Its my cry for help.

Its not easy to live in a place where you are continusly reminded of all the bad things that happened to you. To be in the same space as your assilants who does not see what they have done to you. To see them live their lives while you have all these voices talking to your head.

If your reading this and im still here please run away with me. Please save me.

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winderlylandchime · 6 months

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2/2 ‘TED MADE IT! IM SO HAPPY! YAY TEDDY AND EMMETT ADVENTURE TIME!!! Damn it, so everyone is in couples except Brian and Justin. Why couldn’t Brian go with Justin to LA? This sucks’ ‘oh wow Lindsay is really a fucking bitch. I get the worry though but holy shit what the fuck happened to her? I hate this shit. Throw them both away’ he is so annoyed with Lindsay and Melanie that he is currently repeating the words ‘break up’ over and over. They break up: ‘I TOLD YALL THIS SHIT LIKE TWO SEASONS AGO. FUCKING FINALLY now lets go to Brian and Justin’ ben and michael got engaged ‘man, they’re really stealing the spotlight, huh? DUDE. THIS IS NOT THE TIME. Stealing Debbies shine. Rude.’ And Justin is officially in LA ‘so he went to LA? When? What? Huh? This looks like that party at that club dudes place. I still don’t like this director guy. I hate this. Okay be honest, who is this actor Connor supposed to be? Tom Cruise? Or? He better not get in a way of my two boys or I’m fighting every person who wrote this show.‘ and the gang made it to Toronto ‘so this is like a play on that toronto is like Gay Pittsburgh? This does look like Woodys. BRIAN! OH MY GOD ITS BRIAN! Okay pause *stops tv AGAIN* listen. Remember how Brian reacted to Hunters handjob thingy? Pair that up with Hunters reaction to Brian explaining planes to Mike. BAM! Uncle and nephew duo! I love these two. I can’t believe i didnt think he wouldnt go to canada with a plane. That makes the most sense in the whole show. HE’S RIDING! THE RIDE! Wait stop. *pauses tv AGAIN!* so let me get this right? He found out from Mike that Justin was wanted in LA and his immediate reaction when realizing that Justin is turning it down is to lie about not doing the ride so that Justin wouldn’t sacrifice his future? What the fuck? I mean i know he cares about his future *looks at me and smiles* thats kinda the hottest part about him. But this is UGH. AW BRI AND EM HUGGED! AND HES SMILING! I AM SO HAPPY THAT HE IS FINALLY HAPPY BUT HELL, BLONDIE IS MISSING’ ‘i forgot how much Brian hates marriages. Im kinda surprised that they went that extra with it. Id get if he hated it for himself but others? I feel like he would be more of a minding my own business kinda person. Like me. *looks at me like he’s really proud of himself* me and Brian are clearly the same person because i know my bri bri.’ And we are back to LA ‘i dont know why but i really hate this. Like it’s weird. I love Blondie and the idea of his career becoming huge is awesome but this is just eh. (Justin says his ‘fucking’ line in the meeting) OH MY GOD. I FUCKING LOVE HIM LIKE THIS! PLEASE BLONDIE NEVER CHANGE! This kinda reminds me of when Brian said to Debbie that being a true american is getting fucked in the ass when they went to vote. They really are made for each other’ Mikey/Ben’s wedding is on ‘WHAT THE FUCK?! ALREADY? Awww Brian is his best man! No matter how he feels about stuff, he still cares the most about his friends. *points to tv* BRIAN IS THROWING THE CONFETTI! HES HAPPY FOR THEM BUT HE HAS TO BE GRUMPY AT TIMES. MY BABY HAS GROWN SO MUCH!’ ‘I just realized that Brian missed lindsays wedding and Blondie missed this one. They really cant be together. What the fuck is wrong with writers? Why do they hate them?’ And the Ride has officially started ‘AW BRIAN IS GONNA KICK ASS! Debbie is his mother! Why am i getting emotional by this, i already knew it? This wouldve been better with Blondie but GO BRI BRI! I AM ROOTING FOR YOU!!! We should do something like this. You think its hard? We could have little pride flags on it like Ted! DID YOU SEE BRIS SMILE AT THE END? He tries to act tough but damn it, he really is finally happy, isnt he? If only fucking LA didn’t ruin it. But it’s okay, we got one more episode and all will be fixed!’ He is fully convinced that Brian will confess his love in the last ep. He is so sure that he sent a voice memo to family group chat AND friend group chat to let them know that the ‘i love you scene is coming up in the next episode! I’ll let you guys know how the fuck its gonna go down’

I’m with your brother - I love Brian getting excited for Mikey and Ben. He may not want marriage (loaded statement I know) but he wants to help others who do want it! Just like with Mel and Lindsay! (who are now broken up so that’s not a great example)

Brian has to go on the ride and not to LA for MANHOOD reasons. It’s stupid. It’s a dumb storyline. They could have done so much more with the history of the AIDS ride. Alas.

GAH! Work. More later!

#ask winderlylandchime #dear sweet anon #queer as folk #a straight man watches qaf us 2000 in the year of our lord 2023

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druigswhores · 3 years

Text

something more

(originally posted by alpha-bug)

summary: where pietro confesses his feelings to you without actually confessing them to you, through a necklace. inspired by this prompt list.

content warning: pietro maximoff x fem!reader (i’ll try to write more gender neutral fics in the future!) obviously set in a world where he survives and civil war doesn’t happen. (friends to lovers, mutual pining and pietro being a sap.)

note: okay so this is my first fic in a while so i’m sorry if this sucks </3 i want to write more pietro/peter fics so please send requests ! (also lemme know if you can guess the movie bucky was confused about !)

REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

masterlist

"You're staring." Wanda points out, idly watching the older twin stare at the person who clouded his thoughts, not that Wanda needed to read his mind to know that.

"Don't you have something better to do?" Pietro scoffed, unwillingly looking away to glance at his sister. She chuckled, turning away from her brother to check on the pot on the stove, before continuing to chop the vegetables scattered on the chopping board.

"Don't you?" She simply asked, humming to the song playing out loud from her phone, Pietro's eyes were drawn back to you.

You were explaining the plot of a movie to Bucky who stared at the screen in pure confusion. "I don't get it? He killed her but he loved her?" Bucky asked you, in response you shook your head exasperated. "You saw her give birth right after, how could she be dead if she was naming her kids Buck?" You asked, glancing up when you heard the footsteps of someone approaching you.

"You're not replacing me with this old man, right?" Pietro teased, moving to sit next to you, reclining back on the couch, arm around your waist. You rolled your eyes at what he said, automatically leaning into him as the three of you continued to watch the movie playing on the big screen in front of you. The two of you barely noticed when Bucky decided to leave, too caught up with one another to bother caring about what's going on in your surroundings. You pushed him away from you when he tried to steal the m&ms you were currently snacking on only for him to pour most of the packet into his mouth.

"You disgust me Maximoff." You scoffed, biting back the smile forcing its way up. "And you love it Prinţesă." Pietro retorts, his eyes meeting yours. You opened your mouth to say something but nothing could come to mind, it was common for Pietro to randomly call you nicknames but that doesn't mean you were used to it, especially when he'd use pet-names.

Your friendship with Pietro came as a surprise to the rest of the Avengers years ago due to the differences in your personality but if you asked any of them what they thought about your friendship now they'd complain about how clueless the two of you are to the other person's feelings.

Somehow in the chaos that the two of you called your 'friendship', the line between platonic feelings and romantic feelings blurred. Pietro isn't the type of guy to steer away from romance but this situation was entirely different to anything he experienced. He cant just tell his closest friend that he loved you, he couldn't tell you how when he holds you in his arms it pains him to let go. How could he tell you that? After everything that happened to him in the past, the wall he built around his emotions to protect himself began to crumble and you were the cause of it. Pietro always struggled to talk about his feelings, his past. He felt the urge to protect himself and his twin from anything that could hurt them, he didn't want to make the same mistake again.

The unintentional movie night led to the two of you continuing to hanging out in Pietro's room hours later. It was your nightly ritual to watch an episode or two of a show that Pietro usually wouldn't want to watch before the two of you go to bed. Pietro was in the far end of his room, fumbling with something in the palm of his hand while you sat comfortably in the middle of his bed, head resting on one of his pillows as you set up the show on the laptop.

"For someone as quick as you, you sure are taking your sweet time doing whatever it is you're doing."

Pietro glanced back at you in surprise, almost like he forgot what he was supposed to be doing, too busy staring at the dainty chain tangled in the palm of his hands, with a small engagement ring at the end, in place of a pendant capturing all of Pietro's attention. It was fit for a petite woman. The silver was slightly scratched. Two slightly larger silver stones surrounded a slightly larger stone, although quite dull at first glance the engraving on the inside showed was still noticeable.

"I'm in no rush, dragoste mea." He chuckles, shoving the necklace into his pocket before moving to take his shirt off to put on a different one while continuing to speak. Your eyes followed his movements, subtly admiring his body as his muscles unintentionally flexed which resulted in you feeling your cheeks heat up, quickly looking away to not get caught checking out one of your best friends.

"You know I still don't know how I feel about Vision hanging around my sister." Pietro confesses, his overprotectiveness towards his younger sister evident as he continues to replay what occurred during dinner hours ago, Wanda confessing she wouldn't mind moving to a rural neighbourhood with Vision instead of staying at the Avengers Headquarters.

"People can't control who they fall in love with Pietro." You sighed tiredly not realising the irony behind your words, it wasn't the first time Pietro mentioned his hesitation towards the Android.

"People can't, robots can." He scoffed, walking to the dresser to put away his shirt, now wearing a pale blue shirt instead of the charcoal grey T-shirt he was previously wearing.

He moved to the bed, sitting beside you before shifting around to get comfortable. Your hand reaches out to the laptop to begin the episode only for Pietro's hand to place his above yours, stopping you.

"Since we're on this subject..." he paused to pull the necklace from his pockets before holding the necklace out towards you, letting the ring dangle from the chain between the two of you, twisting and turning because of the sudden movements.

You glanced at Pietro in confusion, eyebrows furrowed. He then pulls the hand that was covered by his own and turning it so your palm faced upwards, dropping the necklace in your hand. You held the necklace between your fingers, admiring the gems on the ring before noticing the engraving etched on the inside of the engagement band.

"I+O?" You read out the engraving in confusion, eyes meeting Pietro's soft gaze. He paused for a bit, struggling to put together a sentence that wouldn't cause the wall he created to completely collapse.

"Irina and Oleg, my parents. This was my mother's engagement ring. It was apart of the few belongings they've managed to find after what happened." He gently takes the necklace from you, signalling you to turn away from him so he can put it around your neck. Gently pushing all your hair to the side you felt goosebumps rise wherever Pietro's fingers grazed on your skin, the familiar heat rising in your cheeks once again.

You were secretly relieved that he couldn't see your reaction, the unspoken tension between the two of you currently was unbearable. You looked down at the ring, twirling it around with ur fingers while Pietro continued to speak.

"We decided that Wanda should keep our father's ring since he barely acknowledged me as his son, let alone a person." Pietro chuckles dryly.

Pietro turns you to face him, palm resting on your left cheek. "It looks good on you Draga Mea." He compliments you, eyes glancing down to your lips ever so often. "Why did you decide to give it to me?" You whispered, struggling to find your own voice.

Pietro's mouth curved into a smile, his thumb gently stroking your face

"Can't you tell?" He asked.

"Hmmm i think I'm going to have to hear you say it." You teased, smiling up at him, arms sliding around his neck pulling him closer towards you. He rolled his eyes feigning annoyance before telling you what you wanted to hear.

The next morning Wanda lightly knocked on her brother's door, wondering why he wasn't at breakfast. Waiting a couple moments for a response Wanda slowly opened the door only to be met with with the two of you lying in bed in each other’s arms, the laptop ended up at the edge of the bed as you completely forgot about it after the events of last night. Pietro had his arms tightly wrapped around your waist while your head rested on his chest, the two of you smiling contently.

"They're good for each-other." Wanda whispers to her partner who stood beside her.

"They are indeed."

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vminvisiblestring · 3 years

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How Robert Berens Made Destiel Canon

or The Beautifully Tragic Road to Destiel

in honor of their one month anniversary, i want to talk about robert berens and how he made it his mission to make destiel canon and the care he took approaching their relationship...

i dont know if this has been pointed out before, but i was looking at the episodes bobo berens wrote when i realized something: he wrote all the significant destiel episodes in s15. i think that means he probably planned to make destiel canon long before s15 started:

he hid a love story inside the monster story. a love story told in five parts:

• initiating event

• rising action

• climax (first twist)

• falling action

• second twist (no resolution)

14x18: absence - “initiating event”

the initiating event introduces the conflict and sets events into motion in a story.

in absence, cas reveals to dean that jack might not have a soul and therefore might not know that hurting his mother was wrong. this angers dean and results in dean telling cas “youre dead to me”. this initiates a chain of events that lead their relationship to experience a tear (or rupture).

15x03: the rupture - “rising action”

the rising action is the result of a character trying to (in this case) solve a problem but a force is at conflict with the character. for every step taken, there is either a successful or failed outcome; this pattern continues all the way to the climax.

complications in dean and cas’s relationship continue to widen the distance between them into the start of season 15 with the deaths of rowena and belphagor (for which dean blames cas) culminating in the infamous “breakup” scene. cas said there was nothing left for him anymore and leaves dean.

15x08: our father who arent in heaven - “rising action”

bobo didnt write this episode but its important to the path because rowena tells dean and cas to fix their relationship in the same episode that michael sends them to purgatory (aka the place dean realized he was in love with cas all those years ago and where they fixed their relationship the first time)

15x09: the trap - ‘climax & first twist”

the climax is the most emotional part of the story and is reached when the character takes the final step to resolve their problem. this is also where the turning point of the story begins and descends to the falling action (and if there is a plot twist, it happens here).

the first twist: dean confesses first. this scene is deans confession disguised as an apology. he might lose cas and needed him to know hes sorry. the prayer scene is so important because, if we read the scene, this is in fact, an apology, but its so much more than that. dean responds to cas’s “i left but you didnt stop me” with “i should have stopped you”. this scene showed just how much dean has grown, how much he’s trying and how much he wants to be free of the anger he feels because he realized it was what separated him from the man he loves on multiple occasions. this is deans way of saying “im sorry. i didnt mean anything i said. you are the most important person in my life and i let you leave. i shouldnt have let you leave. thats my fault. im trying to get better. please tell me you’re gonna be okay. tell me this isnt the last time i’ll ever see you. please. i love you”.

dean and cas reunite near the rift but dean doesnt want to leave before telling cas something. we know it cant be the prayer because its obvious cas heard that; this is something else, but cas stops him. this scene is them making amends with each other the best way they know how: a silent knowing. the conflict has finally been resolved.

15x12: galaxy brain - “falling action”

the falling action consists of the after-effects of the climax and every event from here onward should lead to a logical conclusion.

dean and cas’s relationship is better, they seem at peace. the silent knowing is definitely there, and they both seem comfortable the way they left things. the way things are going, they’ll likely have as much a “happy” ending as a fallen angel and a hunter can have without talking about this silent knowing. we cant forget about the looming empty deal, but knowing cas will never be truly happy, it seems like dean and cas are going to be friends for a long time...

15x18: despair - “second twist”

after the falling action comes the resolution. sometimes in film and television, a surprise second twist will occur after the climax and toss the characters into another fight. the second twist is resolved quicker than the first and leads to a speedy resolution.

the second twist here, however, replaces the resolution because the story of destiel sadly and infuriatingly, never got its resolution.

i feel like bobo was told cas was going to get killed off and thats why he knew there was no way the network would allow dean to reciprocate so he did the best he could to work around the homophobia and make destiel canon as much as possible for us.

this is the most “resolution” we were given by a show we spent years watching and loving. we rooted for the characters, we fought as much for their happiness as they did themselves. and it ended up stabbing jensen, misha, bobo, other cast members, some writers and the fans in the back.

deans face here is all i have left to hold on to and thats not fair. and its not fair that after all these years this is what they did to one of the most complex love stories ever told. not only that, but dean and cas were also some of the complex characters ever put to screen. this is not a good ending for them and it never will be. not until they both get the endings they deserve, as individuals and as one. and im sorry for the pain all this mess has caused and would like nothing more than to squeeze everyone really tight and tell you it’ll be okay.

#destiel #cockles #jensen literally approved of misha and bobos plans for destiel #i mean whenever jensen directed he made sure there were destiel scenes #he WANTED dean and cas to become more intimate #dean and cas deserved to speak their truth and be happy together #not to mention a majority of destiel shippers and dean and cas stans are #lgbtq #so thats just another big fuck you on top of the spits and slaps to our faces with that finale #im sorry to get so negative in a post thats supposed to be positive and bring levity to the darkness we've had this past month #i just cant help but feel so much anger #for robert berens #for jensen #for misha #for us #anyways always remember #destiel is fucking canon #and #homosexual declaration of love #deancas #dean winchester #dean #castiel #cas #supernatural #supernatural final season #spn #bobo berens #jensen ackles #jensen

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hoonhrt · 3 years

Text

ni-ki — as your boyfriend

this might be a little long, ni-ki is just the cutest :(

ni-ki is very young so I think it would take a long time for him to confess his feelings for you as he would be very shy and awkward

he would text you saying “meet me at the park at 4 pm after practice.”

so you go and there he is waiting for you at the swings

you both sit down and there is an awkward silence

you dont know why he told you to come and he is too nervous to even say anything

you both steal glances from each other before ni-ki breaks the silence

“ireallyreallylikeyouandimhopingyoulikemebackorelsethisisgoingtobereallyembarrassingformeafter” all in one breath

you just kinda stare at him and he awkwardly smiles back

you understood maybe like 4 words which were “i really really like you”

you move a little closer to him and intertwine your hands and whisper your confession to him

he than smiles his beautiful boxy smile of his and gets all red

you guys stay with your hands intertwined for the whole time

like you guys are walking back home with your pinkies intertwined

and before he leaves you give him a kiss on his cheek

BUB IS SO SO RED THE WHOLE TIME

thus beginning of the most chaotic relationship to exist

when i say chaotic, i mean chaotic

you guys are always yelling? thats literally how you communicate with each other

“HI NI-KI DID YOU EAT TODAY?” “HI LOVE YEAH I DID, DO YOU WANNA SHARE SNACKS WITH ME?”

if people didn’t know you they would assume you guys are fighting

but youre not, just very very loud

the boys hate when you come over to the dorms cause they will never get a moment of peace

GAMES 24/7

like will make you play games with him even if you arent together

games get even louder

always yelling that the other person cheated

makes fun of his hyungs with you its so funny

you guys will just be laughing at something so hard youre both on the floor with your hands clutched to your stomach

and the boys just pass you by like this is a regular occurrence (which it is)

playfights always

he’ll just randomly tackle you and you guys start to fake fight

loves going on walks with you

like if its just to the store or a walk around the park, he loves being in your presence

sometimes you guys don’t talk when you are together as its a little awkward so you both just enjoy the comfortable silence

making plans with this dude is almost impossible as he never answers his phone

PICK UP YOUR PHONE NI-KI!

so you end up showing up to his door to hang out with him

even if he is doing something, he’ll drop everything to be with you

he is really shy with kisses so I think it will take a really long time to kiss you so he just sticks to off guard cheek kisses <3

really loves forehead kisses :((

loves when you grab his face and pull down his head to be parallel to your lips and kiss his forehead

bby gets so giggly and blushy after

CUDDLES GALOOOREEEE

we all know how clingy ni-ki can get

craves hugs

just loves when you hold him close to you

falls asleep on your lap alot

throws his entire body over you

LOVES WHEN YOU PLAY WITH HIS HAIR

whines when you stop playing with it

he remembers all the little things like your favourite song off of a certain album but wont be able to remember your favourite colour???

TEASES YOU 24/7

like literally all the time

makes fun of you but in a cute way

if he sees you getting upset about it

he wont know what to do except hug you and just cling

like legit magnets

will not let you go until he hears you utter the words ‘its okay’ after his millionth apology

even than he wont let you go cause you are very warm and soft

sometimes you’ll beg him to let you go the practice with you

and that rare chance he does let you come, you guys have the most fun

he loves teaching you dances

even if you dont them very well

it makes his heart so happy seeing you try to do something he is so fond of

loves recording videos of you attempting do dance

he get SO shy if you record him dancing

but you cant help it cause youre literally so amazed by his talent

YOU GUYS MAKES BUNGEOPPANG TOGETHER

its his 2nd fav thing to do aside from dancing with you

they either taste so so yummy or nasty as hell cause you burned them (whoops)

either way just loves spending time with you

teaches you about japanese culture so much :(( loves telling you stories about back home, his family, his hometown, his friends

you see he gets a little emotional so you promise him that one day you guys will go together and adventure japan

he literally falls in love with you right there

bugs you when you do homework

or sometimes he helps cause he misses being at school

thinks about you 24/7 but has trouble actually telling you :((

asks his hyungs for advice all the time cause he wants to be able to show you he loves you

to summrize, you guys just have a very playful and adorable relationship

pls love him forever and ever <//3

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just-a-fangirl13 · 3 years

Text

Thoughts & Theories about MacGyver 5x10 [MacRiley]

HOLY SHIT!

This episode was absolutely INSANE. Im writing out my thoughts once and for all because I need to stop thinking about everything that happened (I highly doubt I will be able to but here's to trying)

SPOILERS FOR 5x10 OFCOURSE

Straight off the bat, I was screaming *internally* and yelling at Mac when he showed the diamond to Bozer. I suspected it yesterday when we got the snippet of Murdoc saying the words DIAMOND and RING with extra emphasis..(everyone on twitter said I was jumping to conclusions.. I thought so too honestly) But damn I did NOT expect them to actually do that!

Now here's why I am not mad about it anymore. [this is my interpretation you are free to disagree]

Firstly, when Mac told Bozer he was going to propose he didnt say I’m doing it because I love Desi or I want to spend the rest of our lives together or because she’s the one (doesn't mean he doesnt care for her ofcourse)

He said “Ever since I lost my dad & Jack, I have been thinking about the bigger picture and a commitment to make things work is exactly what Desi and I need right now. A grand romantic gesture.” He wanted to propose for stability so he could finally be on the same page with her. They never really defined their relationship before and this was a way for Mac to final bring it together. A grand romantic gesture is usually something people use to win their partners back which is what Mac was trying to do I guess. It almost sounds like he has to do it so he doesn't lose her again

(ill get to my second reason in the end)

Then ofcourse Bozer tells Riley about it so she can be prepared. Bozer is such a good friend. He is supportive of Mac AND wants to protect Riley. I love him for it! He really is doing everything to be the best friend he can to both of them. (Leannas death was so painful and I just want to hug him but thankfully Riley had that covered.)

Next we get the BIG REVEAL. The moment all of us had been waiting for.

The moment that SHOOK Angus MacGyver and CHANGED EVERYTHING!

Rileys Feelings!

“You want me to say it out loud? Fine. Yes I had feelings for Mac. There I said it. and yeah watching him and Desi together was breaking my heart so I moved out of his house. I should have said something to him a long time ago but I didn’t and now its over. ”

I had the opposite of a HEART ATTACK! (my heart rate was through THE ROOF!)

I have to say they really really outdid themselves on this reveal.

SIDE NOTE: If anyone comes for Riley and tries to call her a slut or a home wrecker? You will have me to deal with. Even after Murdoc played the clip of her confession she still tried to deny it and brush it off so it wouldn't complicate things for Mac and Desi. If Riley had wanted, she could have easily told Mac this to his face while he was dating Desi and then let things happen from there but she DIDNT. She kept that secret buried so deep she herself was in denial.

(also if anyone calls Mac a player or anything like that.. I will end you. He is doing his best to deal with everything that has happened to him and people keep giving him shit for it....)

Anyways, we see Mac’s expression & he is just confused and shocked and clearly not trying to think about it because it changed EVERYTHING for him.

[Murdoc saying I THINK IM ON TEAM RILEY was a HUGE HIGHLIGHT for me! I love him so damn much!]

Desi took it really well too actually. If they keep going down this road of growth and maturity for her I think I could actually like her again. (Russ too when he apologised to Bozer)

She didnt throw a hissy fit or say I knew it or look at Riley like she was the villain. She focused on the mission & I respect her for that.

(Riley does say, “the next thing you are going to hear on that recording-” and then gets cut off by Desi.. If this will come into play at some point later on or if it was just her trying to explain herself, remains to be seen.)

Then after the climax, we finally hear Riley say the words to Mac in real time and we get our FIRST MacRiley hug of the season!

At this point I thought they would agree to be friends and make the friendzone thing clear BUT NOPE. (you have no idea how happy I am about it not going down like that!)

I was also a puddle on the floor. SO

“Mac look-”

“You don’t have to say anything if you dont want to. Really.”

“I want to. Last year in Germany. I realised I was starting to have feelings for you. Real feelings. I didnt want to make anything weird between you and Desi. I didnt want to mess up our work or our friendship so I decided to bury it. Until the feelings passed.”

“Emotions aren’t a science. You can’t control them.”

Gosh they are so perfect together! The way they look at each other and the HUG! OH MY GOD THE HUG! Its just perfection.

Now we also see this from Desi’s POV. Again no anger or jealousy from her. I think it was an understanding. She realised that she and Mac were never going to work.. maybe a little pain but honestly everything that went down with her and Mac was her fault too. The lack of trust and understanding was always a problem for them. Sure, things were going well but she didnt seem like she was ready for a commitment if im being honest. If Mac had proposed I think Desi would have said no.(again nothing wrong with that)

She didnt want to label their relationship..they haven't said the words I love you to each other and I dont think they even live together. It really was way too sudden.(these are just things im assuming people define how well a relationship is going by.. I have no experience.)

Then ofcourse we have what im calling the goodbye scene. Its the break up before the break up in my opinion.

Desi tells Mac that they should pretend the last 24 hours never happened (that might actually include Mac wanting to propose but make of it what you will..) and that they should have a clean slate. But its very clear from Mac’s face and Desi sees it too that he isnt 100% onboard with it. He cant forget about it.

Which is when Desi says “Look Mac just do whatever you feel is right” and Mac looks confused.

She then gives him a goodbye kiss.

Look if you have ever watched any show/movie before where the characters are saying goodbye to each other or breaking each others hearts...THERE IS ALWAYS A KISS ON THE CHEEK. A final farewell of sorts.

That is what it seemed like to me. It was Desi telling Mac to do what he has to. Even if it inevitably leads to their break up.

Again real emotional maturity from Desi here!

Then we get the scene, Monica Macer (the show runner) tweeted about back in December.

Mac knocking on someones door. If im being honest? I thought it was Desi’s place and he was going to propose...

BUT it turned out to be Riley’s.

Mac clearly hasn't stopped thinking about what happened. I wouldnt either if my best friend who has put her life on the line for me and trusts me 100%, now has feelings for me? That would turn my world upside down too.

especially if I had feelings for her that I buried so deep that I never acknowledged them.

Also this is my scenario for how their first kiss goes down just FYI.. (Mac showing up at Rileys doorstep and finally confessing his feelings and kissing her *probably won't happen that way now though, but I still love it*)

Mac hesitates for a second before finally knocking on her door.

“Mac? Everything okay?”

“I can’t pretend like the last 24 hours didnt just happen. They did. So I gotta ask. Did it work?”

“Did what work?”

“Hiding your emotions and letting it pass. Did they go away?”

and I proceeded to pass out. My brain just checked out...

Now initially in all my freaking out I thought Mac was asking Riley about his feelings. If HE buried them deep enough would he still be able to move on with Desi but then I rewatched it and I realised he was asking RILEY if her feelings were still there, if there was still a possibility of something ever happening.

She never told him its all good now! my feelings are gone and it was a long time ago. She told him she buried it but he needed to know if a future with Riley was something tangible.

BASICALLY ANGUS MACGYVER ASKED RILEY DAVIS IF SHE WAS STILL IN LOVE WITH HIM. *I think I need to go to a hospital now*

So this was my second reason for not being annoyed about the proposal. The writers used it to show what a huge impact it would have on Mac. How much Rileys feelings would actually mean to him. the GAME CHANGER it would be.

A friend of mine said it was kinda funny and a little jarring but I liked it. (I could have done without the proposal) But I understand why they did it. They couldnt have Mac and Desi break up the same day Riley’s feelings came out because then people would hate Mac. They had to make him want to take the next step with Desi but then drop a bomb on him, that would make him question everything.

Again this is what I took away from it.

BUT GOSH WAS THIS EPISODE AMAZING!

I do get that some people are not happy with this and some said it was too sudden *not like we’ve been waiting since season 1 or anything* but I think after 5x11 things will slow down again. Mac may break up with Desi only at the end of the season when he finally comes to terms with his feelings. (Some people are still cautious and I get it but after everything that just happened I find it hard to believe that Mac and Riley won't end up together after all.. not to mention the leaked script conversation between Mac and Riley from 5x15)

Now I dont know how the final scene ends.. they definitely dont get called away for their solo mission immediately after because Mac’s cheek injury is relatively healed in this stills, which means Riley does answer Mac’s question. She may try to avoid it or deflect but he is standing right there so...who knows.

Next weeks episode is a MacRIley solo mission and lets just say things definitely are heating up a bit..*wink wink*

YUP IM HYPED.

BRING ON THE SEXUAL TENSION AND THE ANGST!

#MacGyver #Angus MacGyver #riley davis #macriley #mac x riley #macriley is endgame #macgyver 510 #murdoc

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lolotheparagon · 1 year

Note

What is your favorite scene that you have written for Parfait so far?

I haven't written anything on paper (cos i dont know which writing format would be appropriate for it, i know, its embarassing) but I have a scene of how Florabelle and Parfait became girlfriends

Parfait stared at Flora's saddened expression and stood there in fear and unease. She mustered up enough courage to tell her friend why she couldnt accept this lovely gift:

Why cant you tell your dad to stop pressuring you to be a certain way. Florabelle replied, increasingly worried for her best friend's uneased state.

Do you really? Florabelle questioned.

I want to...He's the only family i have. A-aand he's sick... Parfait answered, slightly quivering in fear and voice cracking under the pressure of the words she just spoke.

Yeah... its a difficult situation. But still you shouldnt put so much pressure on yourself.

But what about being kind to yourself. Flora noted back

Cos its selfish. said Parfait.

No. There's a difference. Florabelle curtly replied, her paws on Parfait's shoulders.

Why? We're best friends, we can give gifts to each other anytime

Why? replied Florabelle

Cos I can't, okay? said Parfait.

WHY?? said Florabelle, raising her voice slightly.

BECAUSE IM NOT WORTHY OF THIS!!" Parfait yells, tears streaming down her face.

Fayfay... Florabelle whispered sympathetically.

Flo? Parfait questioned, confused.

I love you. replied Florabelle

Oh. Oh sprinkles... y-you do?? said Parfait, now blushing like an apple. She never realised her best friend had feelings for her. In hindsight, she shouldve seen that coming.

Heehee, for a while. answered Florabelle.

Oh, i feel stupid now. Why didnt I see the signs? said Parfait.

Fay, even future queens cant read minds. replied Florabelle

The girls laugh.

Listen I dont know whats going on inside your head or what your dad's like, but I want to be there for you. Florabelle declared, holding Parfait's paws.

Flo... Me too. said Parfait, before she knew it, a warm relaxed smile stretched across her face, causing Flora to smile back.

What are ya smiling for? said Parfait.

Fine with me, girlfriend. Parfait replied, beaming with joy.

Florabelle and Parfait both clip on roses on their dresses, symbolising their love for each other and hold hands as they walk and laugh into the horizon.

-----------

So yeah thats what ive got so far. its a work in progress but I thought it was a lovely scene showing how Flora, despite not knowing the full story of Parfait's situation, shes still willing to love and support her and Parfait reciprocates, finally happy to be with someone who loves her unconditionally. Any changes I need to make, please let me know.

#ocs #star cross warriors

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cinnamonest · 3 years

Note

I am a bully and mean and saw that Childe’s a Family Man so I decided to be depraved and write some ideas for DadSon and really I feel like Childe can get worse in that situation- especially if we have an AU where the parents are divorced and his Dad is doing the single dad thing. Like, young Ajax is... precocious- a troublemaker as always- but he’s always been perceptive and more aware than any child should be. He figures its not normal for kids to be this attached to their parents, but he sees how his siblings cling to his mom when he comes for visits and decides nah, he’s fine. But then his Dad introduces him to his girlfriend and he’s... quiet. He dislikes her and wants her gone, but he’ll play “nice” for now bc you like her. When he goes to sleep for the night, he wakes up due to some noise from your room and peeks in and sees you fucking your girlfriend and thats the first time he learns what masturbation is. He can’t get it out of his head and he spirals as he gets older. There’s guilt, bc you’re so sweet and kind and here he is, your son, wanting to fuck dear old dad till he’s weak in the knees and bedridden and drowning in his cum.

He gets... bold, one night. Dad broke up with his girlfriend and he’s drunk himself into oblivion to cope. Ajax carries him to bed and then he... notices the bulge in your pants... the odd squirming and twitch of your legs as he tugs down your bottoms and watches your dick rise to half mast. He plays with it, unsure of wtf he is doing as he feels your harden in his hands- and he gets bolder, touching you as he would touch himself and freezing up when your climax splatters across his face. You passed out, and Ajax hurriedly cleans you and pulls your pants up then runs back to his room with his heart thundering in his chest. His mind running a mile a minute as his obsession grows and darkens his mind.

He searches how gay sex works later that night, and carefully but steadily works his way towards it.

He’s long since taken over the household chores due to your busy work schedule- especially cooking. Your diet is healthy and full of fruits, and you applaud him for being a better cook than his mom as you tuck in. What you don’t know is your after dinner tea is laced with sleeping pills that make sure you stay deep asleep as he practices stretching your hole and finding all your sweet spots. He’s learned to earn money from doing... things, and managed to procure everything he needs to properly prepare you to take his dick when the time comes. Its rewarding when you begin to react to his fingers without him sucking and fondling your cock, how you whine and twitch and come undone in a handful of sharp thrusts at specific angles, how though unconcious, you squeeze his head with your thighs as he goes down on you, and he makes sure to come on your face and belly everytime and take pictures. Every once in a while he compares dicks and marvels at how he’s beginning to outgrow you, and ruts in between your thighs to satiate his desire.

Its taken some time but he’s going to be an adult soon. He already has everything lined up- a scholarship, a job with good advancement opportunities, a new apartment he could py for wholly by himself, etc. He’ show you he’s independent and totally capable of taking care of both of you- so you don’t have to worry about your cute little son anymore, Dad. He’s all grown up and ready to take care of you now- financially, emotionally, and sexually.

He’s so happy that when he comes home he nearly overlooks his mother- his birth mother- in the living room talking to you, a stack of documents on the coffee table as you look nervous but amiable to whatever the fuck she is saying. When he asks what’s gotten you two so happy, thinking oh maybe Tonia got into the highschool she applied for or Teucer made the soccer team- you ruin his mood by telling him you two are thinking of getting married again. And he lashes out. Screaming and arguing about why you two separated in the first place and you CANT get back together! You cant, cant, cant! You have to calm him down and send his mother away, saying youll discuss it later. And ohhhh boy are you miffed with his outburst. You start scolding him and nagging that he shouldnt have done that- there are better ways to express his disagreement and he’s being an emotional, angry brat about it.

And Childe snaps. He grabs his Father and drags him to Childe’s room as he flails and struggles, unable to fight off his son’s honestly inhuman strength as he throws him on the bed and strips him down. Your words are cut short as he gags you with your own balled up underwear, and ties your hands back your own shirt as he rummages for the lube on his desk drawer and settles between your legs. You kick at him and he brushes you off as he soaks your hole in the cold lube and pushes his fingers in, making you choke and stutter at the invasion that- doesnt hurt. Childe sighs, saying he wanted to do it more romantically, but if you’re going to ruin his chances like that then he’ll just speed up and skip a few steps. Your eyes are wide as you beg him to stop through your gag when he shucks off his bottoms and digs his dick out of his pants- already at half mast and huge, as he pumps it while pressing it against your ass cheeks, taking pleasure at how you flinch when he drags his cock head along the crack, over your slick hole, and nestle it lovingly against your testicles, letting you realize just how big he is, then return to your hole. You feel tears in your eyes as he pushes in, groaning loud and low into your ear as he bottoms out. Your brain is still trying to process as he leans back and grins, making sure to drag your hips up so you can see where you two are connected, giggling that his cock was made to be inside you. That he was born to give daddy dearest all the love that mommy failed to.

As he rocks his hips you shut your eyes tight and try to ignore his wanton moans, the absolute aching fullness in your anus as its speared open by your son’s dick, the disgust that swirls in your gut to your body not only being postively receptive to his actions, but also his many confessions of what he’s done to prepare you for this moment, how you almost ruined it. But he’s a good son, he’ll forgive you. Just don’t speak to mommy ever again, okay?

You come with your cock untouched and long before he does, and your face burns in shame. Childe takes a moment to stop and collect some of it on his fingers, smearing it on your face so you don’t forget, and licking it off your stomach with his tongue, giggling that you taste sooooo much better than when he first sucked you off. He’s so glad you like his cooking.

Then he starts thrusting himself in, deep and harsh and forcing your legs flat against your torso as you cry out in pain and pleasure as he chases his own high- dangerous threats falling from his lips as he makes you swear to never ever think of anyone else other than him. Convulsing as he empties out inside of you and you cry at the burn of cum splattering against your bruised guts.

Tears fall from your face as you hiccup and wait for him to pull out, to end the humiliation. Childe merely smiles when he sees the look on your face as he flips you onto your stomach, pressing himself against you and slowly massaging your sensitive dick as he asks sweetly, if you think one round could really satisfy a healthy young man like himself, when he’s been lusting for you for years? Oh no, Dad. He’s going the whole goddamn night and day. And with that horrific revelation sinking in, Childe smiles and presses a kiss to the side of his daddy’s temple and leans back, ready to truly breed his father to the brink. Who knows, maybe if he fucked him hard enough dad could become all nice and round- like he was pregnant. Even if Childe knew that sadly couldn’t be.

#tw: incest #lena's asks #q #!!!! ive been fed

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nadisabug · 3 years

Text

Anything You Want

Pairing: Tsukishima Kei x reader

Warnings: reader is kinda depressed, idk she convinces herself that no one (Kei) could like her, so warning for that, no spoilers though, ooc Tsukki, I am so sorry this was a one am fever dream im sor-

Summary: As old childhood friends of Yamaguchi and Tsukishima, it doesn’t make sense why Tsukishima and you fight so much.

A/N: Ahh I’m so sorry I woke up out of a cold sweat to write this whole thing in one sitting at one am im just 💛love💙 him!! Also!!! I hit 150 followers!! So excited!!! I love you all so much!! Thank you!!!!! (ps requests are open pls send some in)

Haikyuu!! Masterlist

"Kiss me Kei!"

"What? Tch, no that's gross."

"But I'm the mommy!"

"So?"

"You're the daddy! You gotta!"

"I don't even wanna play this dumb game."

"It's not dumb! Pleeaaasseee Kei-chan! For me?"

"Fine, come here."

The slap of the ball hitting the gym floor startled me out of my daydream. My eyes snapped up quickly to the game before me. Did we score? It took me a minute to even register what was going on and who I was looking at. I looked to the referee on his stepladder, waiting for him to call the point.

The whistle blew. He raised his arm. Boys in black and orange jerseys shouted. I clapped and cheered.

It all felt so robotic. But then I looked at him. Then the world shifted into slow motion and began to flow more naturally.

He raised his arm to wipe the sweat off of his brow, the movement mesmerizing. Even the jerk of his body when a teammate patted him on the back seemed graceful. Elegant. He pushed his glasses up a bit and glared at the offender. He turned to say-

"Y/n?" Once again I was startled from my thoughts. My head snapped to the right side where Yachi was standing next to me. She had a concerned look on her face. I swallowed, my dry mouth only producing a lump in my throat. "You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," I responded quickly and looked back to the game. "Just focusing is all." This time I fought not to look at the boy. I didn't want to look at him anyway. I didn't. I didn't.

Finding my eyes drifting back to him, I launched into conversation to pull my mind from him.

"How's the girls team going?"

I was on the girls volleyball team as a first year. I only made the team because I was the only libero and, being honest, I was the best at receiving. I was abnormally short, so I knew I couldn't pull off many other positions.

Well, maybe I could.

I watched as the short, orange haired boy flew across the court and landed an impossible to receive spike. I still wasn't used to that combo no matter how many games I watched. Then again, I only had reflexes, not the raw power that that boy had.

I sighed and tore my eyes from the game to look at Yachi. I slumped onto the railing a plopped my head in my hands. "We need more practice games, honestly. The way we're going we're not going to win our match."

"Don't say that Y/n!" Yachi cried.

I shrugged and looked back at the game. My eyes found blonde hair naturally. "Its true. The girls don't practice enough. I think getting our asses completely handed to us will turn the team around. I just feel bad for the third years who will suffer from it."

Yachi didn't have a response to that. She changed the subject quickly and we chatted until the game ended, the whole time I focused on the freakish number ten instead of the boy I knew deep down in my heart I really wanted to watch.

"Nice net drop, broccoli brain," I smirked and clapped my best friend on the shoulder.

His shoulders slumped and he sighed. "I didn't even mean to do it," he bereaved.

"Fucking who cares?" I snorted. "Got us a fat point and they never saw it coming. Just remember how it felt and do it again."

"Y/n," Yama whined and tried to shake me off.

"Y/n giving you crap again?" A rich voice came from behind me, sending shivers down my spine. "That's rich coming from Pipsqueak."

"Says Mr-cant-block-for-shit," I shot back, turning around so that I could stick my tongue out at him.

"I'd like to see you try to pick up a real serve, not that-"

"Hey, hey, cut it out!" Yama stepped in between us, putting a warning hand on us both. "We're all friends."

I glared at Tsukishima but backed down. I didn't want to upset Yamaguchi. I knew how much he hated it when we fought, seeing as it was his two best friends.

I had known Yama since elementary school, when I saved him from some bullies. One day when we were clearly out matched, Tsukishima saved us in his aloof, roundabout way. From then on we were inseparable.

That is until the second year of middle school when Tsukishima and I started fighting all the time. Despite that, we still hung out together. Who knows why he put up with my constant antagonism, but he always reciprocated and never complained.

We got on the bus soon after the game, headed to the school. I was on the girls bus, them on the boys. When we got back to the school we met up again.

When we came to the usual splitting point, Yama spoke up.

"So I'll walk Y/n home," Yama offered like always. I was about to accept when Tsukishima spoke up.

"Nah, I'll do it." Yama cocked an eyebrow. "It's out of your way, Yamaguchi. She lives closer to me."

We all knew this, but the point had never come up before.

"Okay," Yama said warily. "Are you sure you don't want me to come anyways?"

"Tch, we're fine, I don't need a babysitter." Tsukishima rolled his eyes.

"Okay," Yama shrugged. He took a few steps backwards before he said goodbye and started off in the opposite direction.

Tsukishima wordlessly took off in the direction of our houses, so I followed. I was wondering why he suddenly offered to walk me home, but he offered no clues as to why. He used to walk me home before we always fought, but after that he stopped. This was the first time he walked me home in years.

So we walked in complete silence.

When we reached my house, we stood there awkwardly for a moment, looking at it. I wasn't sure what to say, but before I could figure it out, he spoke.

"Why do you hate me?"

I was startled by both the question and the sudden shattering of silence. I turned to look at Tsukishima. He wasn't looking at me, just straight ahead. I tried to read his facial expression, but like always, it was stone cold.

"I don't?" I answered uneasily.

Tsukishima sighed. "Yes you do, you always act so pissy towards me. You even tense up when I'm near."

"I do not," I frowned. I tried to think if I have ever done anything like that, but I drew blank.

"Yes you do," Tsukishima sighed again, pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes. "We..." He paused. He brought he other hand up and rubbed his eyes, pressing his two fingers into his eye sockets. After a moment he threw his hand down, clearly having made up his mind, and turned to look at me. I felt hot under his intent gaze, his eyes searching mine for an answer I was afraid I didn't have. "We used to be close when we were little. What changed."

It wasn't a question. It was more of a statement. It was like he meant to say something different.

So I said it for him.

"We changed."

He scoffed, his face twisting into his signature cynical look. "Bullshit."

"No, that's the answer. Maybe you're not asking the right question," I shot back, confidence fueled by his venom.

He opened his mouth to say something, but closed it soon after. His brows furrowed and his lips pressed together. It was more emotion than he was exhibiting earlier, and for some weird reason, it made something in me happy.

"Why are you so mad at me?" He finally asked, face relaxing a bit. He seemed genuinely curious as to the answer.

His sincerity almost made me explode with anger. How could he not know? He was the most insufferable person in the entire world, what wouldn't I be mad about.

But then again, that was wrong. He never mad me mad with his snide comments and dirty looks. It was all in play and it never really bothered me, ever since we were kids, and he knew that too. So I couldn't lie and say it was his personality because I loved his personality. It was something else. Something I was afraid of admitting.

I grit my teeth. What did it matter if I said it or not? It's not like he'd understand anyway.

Once I made up my mind I met his eyes.

"Because you will never give me what I want."

"And what is that?" His voice was soft, wispy, breathless. Afraid.

Your love.

I couldn't say it. Bile rose in my throat and tears prickled at my eyes. I opened my mouth but quickly shut it. I wouldn't say it. I was too afraid. My eyes fell to the ground, and with them, all my confidence.

All at once my mind began to barrage me. He will never love you, he could never love someone like you. He-

He laughed.

He fucking laughed.

My mind was thrown to a complete and total standstill by the absurdity of it. I looked back up at him with watery eyes in confusion.

"I thought you were smarter than that," he grinned, one corner of his mouth charmingly quirked upwards. "Than to decide what I think."

"What?" I mumbled nearly incoherently.

"We both know if you ask I'll do anything for you, so quit your crying, Pipsqueak."

I opened my mouth, completely surprised by his confession. He'd do anything for me? That couldn't be right...

But the more I thought about it the more I realized it was true. He had always done everything for me. Whenever I needed him he was there. It was me that started the fighting, all because I let my mind tell me that he could never love me, that he never would.

I met his eyes once again, this time brimming with happiness.

"Kiss me, Kei."

"Fine," he dramatically sighed, hiding a small grin. "Come here."

And he did.

Taglist:

Taglists are open! Shoot me an ask or a dm with what fandom you want to be tagged in and I’ll do it right away! :)

#sorry this is a crack fic #also this is my first haikyu fic pls be gentle #this is not really edited sorry #tsukkishima x reader #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima imagine #haikyu x reader #haikyu!! x reader #tsukki fluff #tsukki x reader #haikyuu tsukki

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axiang-n-chengling-s-dads · 3 years

Text

Baek Kyung: The Writer’s Stand-In

“In this messed-up world, the only moment I can be myself is when I’m with you on the stage. In both the previous book and this book, the Baek Kyung that the writer draws in our scenes is the real me.”

Baek Kyung is a well-written and complex character, who starts off as Dan Oh’s antithesis, under the writer’s control and slowly break’s free from his previous identity to find his real self.

Dan Oh’s Antithesis

“Think about it. Was there anything that changed as you’d intended? In the end we’re following the writer’s story.”

Baek Kyung while not exactly the writer’s stand-in, is someone who challenges Dan Oh constantly on her beliefs, and for a very long time represents the way the writer views things.

He is the one who points out that they couldn’t ultimately change anything, going against both Dan Oh and Haru’s faith in their power to change the story.

This comes mostly from the fact that Baek Kyung is unable to shake off the writers influence on him.

“You’ll change the story which has been drawn already? (...) How can you be sure if the writer is still drawing this or if he’s finished it already?”

Baek Kyung is also the one who points out that events are repeating themselves from the previous book, as are the lines, and suggests that the writer is more in control of them than they think. He is also the one to tell Dan Oh that it was Haru who killed her in the previous book, with the staunch belief that Haru will eventually lead to Dan Oh’s downfall.

“You cannot leave me because you’re not supposed to. That’s your fate. That’s the reason why you were born and existed to this day.” -Trumpet Creeper, to Haru

“You’ll always have to stay by my side. That’s just who you are.”- Secret, to Dan Oh

Another writer’s belief that Baek Kyung upholds is the belief in this hierarchy of extras and main characters. He believes in the realness of the stage, and that the character’s drawn by the writer for them are their true selves.

“Everything is back in its place. Its better for Dan Oh too. At least she wont suffer between the gap of the stage and shadow.”

Baek Kyung also believes in the bliss of ignorance as opposed to the burden of knowledge. When he comes to know that characters that die in the shadow lose their self-awareness, he says it wouldn’t be a bad way to be, even if you only experienced emotions the writer wrote for you and had to lose all your memories.

The Monster

“I desperately wanted everything to go back to its place. I’d hoped the stage was the reality. But it wasn’t the real you on stage. And wishing to keep you by my side knowing that you weren’t yourself, makes me a monster.”

Under the writer’s control, Baek Kyung starts off as a cold, wounded character, Dan Oh’s distant fiance. As his character, his behaviour ranges from stand-offish to downright cruel sometimes.

As Dan Oh gains self-awareness and changes as a person, Baek Kyung notices. He notices the changes in her and the entry of Haru.

He starts to gain self-awareness once, in the shadows, he begins to fall for Dan Oh and begins to regret his harsh actions on stage.

“You don’t know how I was always alone, outside the stage.”

It is important to understand the reason for his personality remaining largely unchanged from his stage self is because, unlike Dan Oh, Do Hwa, or Ju Da, Baek Kyung is unable to separate the identity the author has given him.

He also cannot divorce himself from his set up. He still grieves and blames his mother who left him when he was young, and also distances himself from Dan Oh because she reminds him of his mother. He believes that her terminal conditions means that she will leave him one day too.

“You said you didn’t know if the Eun Dan Oh in my memory was real or fake. But I wish she was real. There must be a reason why everything’s going back to what it was before.”

Like I said before, Baek Kyung thinks that the stage is the reality. When Dan Oh’s ten-year crush seems to disappear into thin air, and she claims it was fake all along, Baek Kyung is hurt and confused. For him, as for her, the memories of their childhood together were real, even if they were just a part of their set-ups.

"Light pink roses mean, ‘Only you know how I feel.’”

Another problem he has because of his fear of abandonment is that he guards his emotions very closely, and therefore they’re always painfully left unsaid. By the time he comes around to confessing to them, it is too late.

Dan Oh has already found happiness elsewhere, and is adamant in changing the stage.

“You cant help it Sae-Mi, youre the villain. (...) You need to tell them what their role is.”

In his bid to stop her from changing the stage, and his frustration with his character and the writer, Baek Kyung realises how fully he has turned into the role of the villain. Both in the stage and in the shadow, in this book and in the previous one too, he is always placed against Dan Oh in an antagonistic manner. This arc is completed when he removes her oxygen mask in the hospital and is shown that he was the one who’d killed her in ‘Trumpet Creeper’.

It is here that his worst fears come true: he was the reason why everyone he loved left him-- he was the real monster.

The Real Baek Kyung

“You (Dan Oh) are the only person who really knows me.”

Funnily enough, for someone who thought he was Dan Oh’s beginning, it is Eun Dan Oh herself who becomes the beginning of the new, the real Baek Kyung as the show draws to a close.

“They are cliches, but we’re the only ones who know how cruel and sad this is. Because we’re just Dan Oh and Baek Kyung before our characters.The Dan Oh of ‘Secret’ wants to thank you, and the Dan Oh of ‘Trumpet Creeper’ forgives you.”

Having blamed himself for her death in Trumpet Creeper and mistreatement in Secret, Baek Kyung could only truly rid himself of the writer’s clutches if he separated himself from his stage self. Eun Dan Oh’s acknowledgement of their stage roles, and of their relationship off-screen let’s him break free from the cycle of resentment and revenge.

“You can go in my place. Don’t get the wrong idea. I’m doing this because I hate the writer.”

The second step in his transition is undermining the stage. As someone who fully believed in the stage’s authority, the moment where he actively works to change it is important-- he finally does the right thing helping Dan Oh recover her true self, and sheds his identity as the monster.

“(...) or hate each other from now on. Let’s put the past behind us.”

The truce with Jimmichi Fairy is also an important one. Along with Dan Oh, his character in the previous book had also harmed Jimmichi Fairy. Remembering is only painful for them because of the grudges they hold. Letting them go, and forgiving each other, Baek Kyung, JF, and Haru finally resolve their conflict, ensuring that Secret, or any book in the future does not meet a violent ending like Trumpet Creeper did.

“I am grateful that the writer made me your younger brother.”

“Thats the funniest thing you ever told me.”

“I mean it. Because that means I’m always by your side.”

This is the final step in Baek Kyung’s journey of self-discovery. Baek Kyung was someone who always felt as though he was alone, pushing away his brother even after he found out that Baek Joon-Hyun was also self-aware. Like before, he could not leave behind their setups-- he was not his real brother, but the son of the woman who’d tried to replace his mother.

Admitting that he needs Baek Joon-Hyun, and letting the latter love him, Baek Kyung finally leaves behind his old self completely, and finally finds the Real Baek Kyung.

#extraordinary you #extraordinary you meta #july found by chance #meta #meta analysis #kdrama #kdrama recs #at a distance spring is green #the devil judge #penthouse #my roommate is a gumiho #vincenzo #youth of may

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khrystalsnow · 3 years

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ALL TIME FAVOURITE FICS

I wanted to make a list of my favourite fics (not sure if I’m missing any). There’s probably more that I would put here but they’re buried under my likes however, I may add more in the future. I hope you enjoy!

*PLEASE let me know if I did a mistake or put the wrong link!

LEGEND:

🥺Fluff

🤬Angst

😏Smut

😂Crack

FICS

Passion Fruit by @joonbird 🤬😏knj

-The very first fic that introduced me to tumblr fics (bts) which is just heaven sent. I remember reading this in awe because of the writing and the characters. Daddy namjoon showed oc a whole new world when he ate her out and I’m kind of jealous😔 I really love the plot and the character development for the oc and this was overall a good read!

Comfort Inn Ending by @joonbird 🤬😏jjk

-Another one of Amy’s work (top tier), that broke my heart into a million pieces. Honestly, I’ve read this series once, because of how good it is. Its sad, like I broke down a couple of times because of the two characters, kind of sad. That just shows you how amazing it is, that I can’t even reread it.

Hot Summer by @httphopewrld 🥺😏🤬 jjk

-I don’t know why but after I discovered this fic, I couldn’t stop thinking about this and the plot. Curtains are not really something we think about most at of the time but JK! Why couldn’t you just buy some curtains?! I mean I don’t blame the reader for peaking though. I’m really happy with the ending and how they talked it out like mature adults in the end.

Greedy by @xjoonchildx 🤬😏 myg

-A part of the Guarded Series which is just amazing! I picked Greedy because it’s currently ongoing and I really like yoongi’s perspective more than the other series. Yoongi’s a loner and people in his line of work, knows that. When he met oc, its like he finally found something that he can treasure on his own and completely different from the people around him. I just want them to be happy😭 I can’t wait for more chapters to come!

Hammer it Home by @gukslut 🥺😏🤬 knj

-I recently read this and fell in love with it really quickly! I’m pretty sure that everyone knows this fic and loves it just like me. I can’t really say anything more, except daddy joon is absolutely filthy, so read it.

Flower by @readyplayerhobi 🥺😏🤬 jhs

-God, this is such a good series. It deals with a lot of topics such as panic attack, body insecurity, anxiety, having children etc. (please look at the trigger warnings). We get to see the oc begin to date hoseok and see their relationship grow beautifully. Both of the characters are so different individually, but together, they look so beautiful:((

Boyfriend Material by @ladyartemesia 🥺😏😂 jjk

-The amount of times I’ve reread this is unreal. I want someone like jungkook in real lifee😭😭 I really love how its in bullet points to get the points across and easy to read. It also just seems so much more personal because it feels like we’re with them throughout the process of their relationship.

Of Fire and Love by @hollyhomburg 🥺😏🤬 myg

-When I first read part 1, I already fell in love with it. Dragon yoongi, namjoon and hoseok, sorcerer jin and jungkook, fairy jimin and human baby tae!!! I’ve reread this series multiple times and it just never gets old😌I love how everything connects and the smut is spicy✨

A Song Request by @n8dlesoupguk 🥺🤬 jjk

-THIS! IS! SO! CUTTTTTEE!!!! *PUNCHING THE AIR* ahhhhh the amount of time I smiled while reading this is unreal!! I love jungkook and I love this fic. I cant say anymore because of how cute it is! READ ITTTTTT!

Only For Love by @lysjeon 🥺🤬 jjk

-This has a special place in my heart because it was my first social media au. I LOVE the characters especially sarang 🥺its so well done and reread it all the time. Chae’s aus are really good 10/10 would recommend her whole entire masterlist

I Found by @hxseok-honee 🥺🤬😂 myg

-Ahh!! binged this at 1am and I don’t regret it! It’s a hogwarts au featuring slytherin, brooding, meany, yoongi and hufflepuff reader that is friends with the whole squad. It really has everything that I love about hogwarts aus. The progression of their relationship was a whole roller coaster and at the end I was really happy for yoongi to be able to find his forever girl and be friends with crackheads.

The Dinner Party by @lamourche 🥺🤬😏 myg

-Beautiful writing and the story is immaculate *chef’s kiss* I think about this fic once a month and reread it multiple times. I love it and hate it at the same time because I just want them together and figure their shit together, especially in the recent chapter. The circumstances and emotions are relatable that I just wanna hug both of the characters 😔

Rattled by @gukslut 🤬😏 jjk

-I’ve already recommended this before, meaning, this is really good. It follows jungkook as a single father with reader as his neighbor. Its angsty as fuck and will probably make you cry for jungkook because how much struggle he goes through with raising lovely areum by himself (respect for single parents!), but they figure it out in the end!

Seven Seas by @readyplayerhobi 🥺🤬😏 kth

-When I read Atlantis!Taehyung, I was sold. This fic pops up in my head once in a while and I love it every single time I read it again. OC is a smart bitch, and works hard to achieve whatever she desires. I love her relationship with taehyung sooo much, I could picture them together being oc’s parents: lovey dovey even when they’re old and supports one another😌

Intro: Her by @jamaisjoons 🥺🤬😏 knj

-God the amount of serotonin this gives me every time I read it is *chef’s kiss* maknae as namjoon’s kids is also a bonus! I really love family aus and this completely filled me with happiness.

Chasing Butterflies by @ddaenggtan 😏🥺😂 jjk

-Pretty sure everyone already knows and loves this fic but I just had to put this here. It’s literally perfect! Oc pining for weeb jungkook is everyone because he’s cute as hell😔 the SECONDHAND EMBASSAMENT I felt when she confessed is too much😂😭 Please read it if you haven’t because IT’S SO GOOD

A Home Found In You by @lovmail 🥺(wholesome) jjk

-Another single dad jungkook because I love it😔 This fic introduced me to rochelle’s account and binged all of her other fics (which are also great). This also pops up in my head at random times and I always give in to the urge of rereading it because its so good!

For Love and Money by @jimlingss 🥺🤬😏 ksj

-This shit was a whole roller coaster alright but I loved it! it’s a forced arranged marriage and when reading the first chapter, you will want to read more. I love both of the characters soo much and the progression is immaculate, so glad they got their shit together in the end😌

Brass and Strings @jimlingss 🥺🤬😂 knj

-This was also another roller coaster of feelings and angst. It’s a little long but the pacing is really good. I LOVE the main characters so much!!! oc’s a badass, despite what she’s been through and I strive to be like her ngl😔 This made me cry on multiple occasions, just read this you won’t regret it.

Inside My Mind by @jimlingss 🥺😏 knj

-The amount of times I think about this on a monthly BASIS. It’s half fluff and smut which is the perfect combination for me😌 I love the concept of mind reading, but when people can hear nsfw thoughts though😳 honestly read it if you haven’t, IT’S SO GOOD

The Deli Diaries by @jimlingss 🥺 pjm

-This shit was the CUTEST shit ever!! both characters are so cute (I’ve said that word so many times😭) and their interactions during work is so cute😭 At this point just read Kina’s whole masterlist

The Alpha by @ladyartemesia 🤬😏 pjm

SO GOOD, immaculate, well written, the plot 10/10. This fic is amazing!! I get so excited whenever I see that it’s updated. The world is so fascinating and detailed that you wanna learn more about it. The plot is so thrilling and the action parts got me so hooked! I can’t wait for more part to come!

A Court of Curses by @readyplayerhobi 🥺🤬😏 jhs

UGGHHHH one of my favourite hobi fics ever!!! of course it’s a vampire and witch au. I love the main characters so much OK😭 they just wanna love each other and it physically hurt me when they were also hurting😭😭😭 but the ending is so satisfying, so I’m happy!

#kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #kim namjoon #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #favourite fics #fic recs #ReadingList

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