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yellowsuitcase · 4 years

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Prophecy Problems // Draco Malfoy

Request from @lovecatsnotpeople

A/N: For this imagine, please pretend Hermione becomes the Minister of Magic much sooner than 2019, lol.

Summary: Draco is Y/N’s boss and she comes to him after she makes a mistake. He gets angry.

Warning(s): SMUT, Unprotected sex, choking, rough sex, slight voyeurism (but not really)

Word Count: 4k

Y/N walked through the hallways of the Ministry with guilt sitting heavy in her gut. She knew her boss would be angry at her, there was no doubt about it. To say she had fucked up was an understatement. Since she was the Keeper of the Hall of Prophecy, she had done her daily rounds that morning. However, when she was leaving, she noticed a new prophecy waiting to be placed on an open stand. Disaster struck when she picked it up and read the name on the tag. She was so unprepared to see that name on the paper and thus dropped the orb. When the sound of it shattering reached her ears, Y/N knew she was done for. The silvery smoke circled around her feet and then was reduced to white ashes. Once she processed what she had done, she sprinted out of the hall quicker than she ever thought possible of herself.

And now Y/N stood outside her boss’s door. It looked more daunting than ever. She adjusted her brown suede skirt, clenched her hands, and inhaled deeply. Slowly, she raised her fist and knocked on the wooden door. “Come in,” said a firm voice.

Y/N turned the door handle and stepped one foot into the room, but before she was entirely through the archway, her eye caught sight of the plaque on the wall. Draco Malfoy, Head of the Department of Mysteries. Her heart began to pound. She’d only been in this office a handful of times, despite wishing she could visit more often. It was a spacious room filled with white and black decor. The walls were a stark white, making the black picture frames and tapestries stand out. To her left were a coat hanger and stand-alone closet. In the back corner sat a tall plant in a silver pot; it had orange flowers sprouting from it. The floor was covered with the same stone from the hallway, but there was a large emerald rug with intricate details in this office. And in the center of the room was Draco, sitting at his desk. It was littered with parchment as well as empty chocolate frog boxes. The man himself was tossing a green apple up into the air and letting it fall back into his hand. He looked to be in a good mood. He caught the apple in his firm grasp, the veins in his hand becoming visible, and set it down on the cedar desk. He looked up at her with interest in his eyes. But that soon faded when he noticed the remorseful look upon her face.

“Ms. Y/L/N,” he said curiously. “What brings you to my office?” he asked as Y/N closed the door behind her; she still hadn’t made eye contact with him. She was already terrified of what his reaction to her news would be, and it didn’t help that he was quite possibly the most attractive man in the building. “Well, you’re my boss, so I have to report to you if something ever goes wrong,” she replied, cutting to the chase.

Draco raised an eyebrow. “Has something gone awry?” he questioned while gesturing to the leather-clad chair in front of him. Y/N gulped, stepped forward. She scanned Draco up and down while still avoiding eye contact. He looked particularly striking today. His hair was perfectly styled. The wispy bangs on his forehead appeared soft. He was wearing a long black jacket as well as a button-up paired with a green tie. The chandelier in his office provided perfect lighting; his skin was almost glowing. His legs were spread to provide support for his elbows. Y/N couldn’t help but steal a glance at his bulge, wondering if the rumors were true about Draco’s size. Of course, she couldn’t tell just by looking. She felt ashamed of herself and averted her eyes as she took a reluctant seat.

“I’m afraid so,” she answered once she was settled. She then began to pick at some loose thread on the seams of the chair, her nerves getting the best of her.

“Quit picking. You’ll pull out the entire stitching,” Draco ordered sternly. Y/N’s hand immediately released the thread and found a new place on top of her lap. She was growing more anxious by the second, and Draco’s irritation was increasing. Y/N gulped before finally making eye contact with the man. He was looking at her intently, expectantly almost. His hands were clasped underneath his chin as he stared at her. Y/N decided to spit it out.

“I was doing my rounds this morning, and there was a new prophecy, and I accidentally dropped it, and it broke,” she said quickly, her words mushing together. Draco smiled at her and separated his hands. “That’s not the end of the world, Y/N, you know that,” he assured. “Whose was it? We’ll send them an owl to inform them of the accident,” he said as he sat up in his chair. It was clear Draco didn’t understand the gravity of the situation as he picked up the apple again and took a bite out of it. Y/N took a deep breath before responding. “It was Hermione Granger’s.”

Draco stopped moving, a stoic expression fell over his face. Y/N watched as his eyes grew dark. He stood up from his chair, walked over to the bin, spat out his food, and tossed the apple in with it. Y/N looked down, feeling sick to her stomach. She heard him coming towards her. His feet came into view; they were right in front of hers. “Stand up,” he commanded. Y/N gripped the arms of the chair and hoisted herself to a standing position. She stared intently at the smudge on her glossy black flats as fear began to stir in her chest. “Look at me,” Draco said quietly. Y/N didn’t move an inch; she was too afraid.

“You’re telling me you dropped the Minister’s prophecy? Is that correct?” Draco asked. Y/N could feel his breath on her face; she nodded solemnly. “You do realize I’ll have to take the blame for your fuck up, don’t you?” he asked, his tone sharp. “She’ll be angry, hell, she’s hardly forgiven me for our time at Hogwarts, she’s not going to be happy to hear her prophecy was smashed to smithereens, is she Y/N?” Draco asked condescendingly; he was raising his voice now. Y/N shook her head.

“That’s what I thought,” he snapped. He stormed over to his desk and ran his hands through his hair. Y/N’s curiosity got the better of her, and she spared a glance up at him. He was positively fuming; she wouldn’t have been surprised to see steam bursting from his ears.

Draco breathed heavily as he shuffled through papers on his desk. “Fuck!” he yelled, making Y/N jump. The man reached for his neck, roughly loosened his tie, and yanked it over his head. Y/N felt her skin turn hot; she averted her eyes back to the floor. “Bloody hell, Y/N. If I lose my job for this, you’re coming down with me,” he shouted. Y/N flinched at his words. Suddenly, his hand was on her face, her heart stopped.

“Look at me,” Draco growled as he forced her chin upwards. His face was tight, and his teeth were bared. Even though fear coursed through Y/N’s veins, she couldn’t resist a peek at his tempting lips. Draco tightened his grip on her jaw. “You think I’m stupid, don’t you? I’ve seen you looking at me.” Y/N held her breath. She stared into Draco’s eyes, where once they held anger, they now held lust. “Every day in the hallways, I see you. I see you looking me up and down. I notice how your eyes linger, Y/N,” Draco said as he began trailing his hand down her face and onto her neck. He applied light pressure, just enough to send a pleasant buzz through her body.

“Frankly, I find it flattering, almost endearing. But, darling, let me ask you this…” Draco trailed off. His left hand remained around Y/N’s neck while his right traveled to the small of her back. She breathed heavily as he began to trace small circles on the fabric of her skirt. Suddenly, he pressed his palm flat against her. Y/N felt herself growing lightheaded with desire. Draco chuckled lightly and pushed her hips forward, firmly pinning her against him. Y/N started to gasp, but Draco tightened his grip on her neck, cutting off her airflow. He smiled down at her as she squirmed.

“Are you sure that this is something you want?” he asked in a low, sultry voice. Y/N felt a shiver run down her spine. Draco cocked his head, prompting her to answer. She was unable to speak, so she gingerly nodded her head. Draco smirked. “Is that so?” his face turned dark, “then prove it,” he whispered. He released his hold on her neck, and Y/N jumped into action, smashing her lips against his. Draco smiled into the kiss and slipped his tongue inside Y/N’s mouth, where he gently began to swirl it around hers. Y/N couldn’t help but let out a soft moan as Draco then began to suck on her tongue. Y/N pressed her thighs together and felt her wetness growing.

Draco pulled away to look at the woman in front of him. Her cheeks were flushed, and her white shirt had been drawn up, revealing her stomach. Draco put his hands on her cheeks and pulled her close to kiss her swollen lips. He nibbled on her upper lip before pushing away and spinning Y/N around so that her butt was pressed against the front of his desk. He smirked at her before crouching down to his knees. Y/N’s breath caught in her throat as Draco pushed her shirt farther up her torso. He sensed Y/N’s eyes on him but paid her no mind. Swiftly, he took out his wand and cast a quick, locking spell on the door. He turned back to Y/N and gently kissed her stomach while simultaneously gripping her thighs underneath her skirt, preventing her from rubbing her thighs together like she had been doing previously.

“Draco,” she mewled. The man pulled away from her immediately and glared up at her. Even though she was looking down on him, his next words still made her falter. “Call me, sir,” he whispered. Y/N shuddered as she felt his breath fan over her stomach. Draco kissed her again, this time taking some of her skin into his mouth, biting and sucking softly. When he released her, there was a red mark beginning to form next to her bellybutton. Draco kept a firm grip on her thighs as he pressed a kiss to her lower abdomen through her skirt. It had a little corset in the front instead of a zipper or button. He considered untying it but figured it would be more fun to have her keep it on. He removed his hands from her thighs and grabbed the hem of her skirt, lifting it over his head. He was now facing her crotch. Y/N was breathing fast above him; he could only imagine the thoughts running through her mind.

Draco hovered his mouth over her inner thighs, teasing her. She attempted to close her legs, trying to create friction, but his hands flew to her knees and gripped them tightly. He then pressed his mouth to her clothed pussy, eliciting a sharp gasp from her lips. He slowly began to lick her through her underwear, making it even damper than it already was. He could tell she was getting impatient because of the way she was pushing her hips upwards, so he took the fabric in between his teeth and yanked it down, revealing her pussy to him. Draco pursed his lips and blew air directly onto her clit. Y/N whined and tried to buck her hips, but Draco’s firm grip kept her pinned to the desk. “Stay still,” he ordered before sticking out his tongue and dragging it down her slit.

Y/N slapped a hand over her mouth to prevent a cry from escaping her. She never thought in a million years she’d be in this position. But there she was, pressed against her boss’s desk and being eaten out by him. His tongue was thrusting in and out of her entrance slowly, steadily. It was making Y/N dizzy. She desperately wanted him to get on with it and slip himself inside her. Alas, Y/N knew Draco. She knew that anything that happened between them would only occur according to his terms. Y/N had no control in Draco’s grasp; that was obvious. And while that aroused her, it also frustrated her to no end.

Draco continued flicking his tongue within her, but then he added his thumb into the equation. With it, he began to rub her clit, drawing out a long moan from Y/N, whose fingers were squeezing the edge of the desk. She felt her legs begin to tremble, the weight of her body was getting to be too much, and she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold herself up much longer. Despite the burning in her calves, Y/N held herself still as she felt her climax approaching. “Please, sir,” she pleaded. Draco’s tongue began to speed up while his thumb maintained a consistent pace. The contrast between slow rubbing and fast thrusting brought Y/N to the edge. She clenched her walls and prepared for orgasm, but it never came. At the last second, Draco lifted his thumb off her clit and retracted his tongue, leaving her empty.

Laughing, Draco pulled himself out from under her skirt. He pushed off his knees and stood up, looking into Y/N’s eyes. “Did you really think I’d let you cum?” he asked, an amused look on his face. Y/N stared at him silently; she couldn’t think about anything besides the intense throbbing between her legs. “Lemme let you in on a little secret, darling,” he said while putting his large hand on her neck and pulling her close, “The only time you’re allowed to cum is when you’re wrapped around my cock and begging for it. Understood?” he growled in her ear. His words had a physical effect on Y/N’s body; she could hear her heartbeat in her ears. “Yes, sir,” she mumbled, feeling his hand against her throat.

“Louder,” he demanded. Y/N swallowed thickly before repeating herself. “Yes, sir, I understand.” Draco tightened his hold on her neck and then abruptly let go. He pushed her to the side and laid his hands on his desk, swiftly brushing off all the papers onto the floor, not caring about the mess. Y/N didn’t waste a moment; she kicked her underwear off her feet and rushed to the end of the desk. Putting her hands on top of it, she jumped up and laid down. Draco cocked an eyebrow; he looked pleasantly surprised by her actions.

“Somebody’s eager,” Draco mused. Y/N let out a whine and arched her back. She wanted him badly. Draco tutted and walked around the desk, where he positioned himself between her legs. He locked eyes with Y/N and maintained contact with her as he took the bottom of her skirt and lifted it up, exposing her bare pussy to the air. Y/N couldn’t help but moan. She was the most aroused she’d ever been in her life. Draco extended his index finger and gently slid it inside her. With his opposite hand, he held her hips down, already anticipating that he’d have to if he didn’t want her to squirm.

Y/N, with her legs spread and waist held down, was rendered helpless to Draco’s touch. All she could do was moan as he inserted another finger and slowly thrust into her. In between thrusts, he spread his fingers and began to stretch her out. “Sir…” Y/N called quietly. Draco hummed. “What is it, princess?” he asked.

“I need you,” she replied, feeling Draco insert yet another finger. Y/N clenched down on his digits inside her. When he gave her a particularly hard thrust, she whimpered. Then he grabbed her chin roughly. He held her face in his hand and put his thumb over her lips. She instinctively took it into her mouth and began to suck. Draco smiled and said, “I’m gentle now, but don’t worry darling, I’ll fuck you so hard you won’t be able to walk tomorrow. How does that sound?”

Y/N groaned and felt a blush rise to her cheeks, painting them red. Draco let go of her face and continued to slide his fingers in and out of her, making sure to go slow. Y/N waited a few more minutes before saying, “Sir, please, I’m ready.”

“Are you now?” Draco asked, still stretching his fingers within her. Y/N whined and wriggled on the desk, feeling her frustration grow. He wasn’t listening to her. “Yes,” she retorted, letting her annoyance be known through her tone. She gasped when she felt a sharp slap land on her inner thigh. “You’re ready when I say you’re ready,” Draco growled. Y/N gulped and remained silent, letting Draco put a fourth finger inside her. He thrust hard and spread his fingers; the drag of his digits against her walls sent sparks through her body. She could feel her wetness begin to drip, and she felt as though she was going insane with need.

Finally, Draco removed his fingers. He smirked at Y/N as he began to unbutton his pants. She watched as he pushed down his underwear, and his dick sprung free. He rubbed it a few times and aligned the tip with her entrance. Y/N held her breath and bit her lip as he slammed his hips forward, filling her to the hilt. She was hardly able to breathe in as he immediately began to pull out and force himself back in. He set a harsh pace; the desk was shaking underneath them. “Fuck! Don’t stop,” she begged.

Draco grunted and gripped her hips, pulling them towards him so that they met his with each thrust. Y/N reached for something, anything to hold onto; she needed to ground herself. Draco seemed to take notice of her panic. He let go over her hips, grabbed her thighs, and brought them to his waist. Y/N got the hint and wrapped her legs around his middle, bringing the pair even closer, allowing Draco to pound her even harder. Y/N nearly screamed when he found a deeper spot within her. She noticed Draco had repositioned his hands. They were now pressed to the desk on either side of her head. Y/N reached up and gripped his forearms. This was a mistake. She watched as a vexed expression formed on Draco’s face. In a swift and aggressive motion, he turned his arms out, forcing Y/N to let go of him, and when her hands were in the air, he seized her wrists, pinning them to the desk. Y/N felt butterflies erupt in her stomach. Unknowingly, she clenched down on his cock, making him laugh. He peered at her with a prideful look on his face. “Did you like that, Y/N? Does pinning you to the desk make you wet, hmm?” he cooed tauntingly. Draco stared at her expectantly. When she didn’t reply, he slowed his speed.

Y/N whimpered and jutted her hips, trying to urge him to resume his brutal pace. Draco shook his head. “Answer me, darling, maybe then I’ll make you cum.” Y/N closed her eyes, letting his words sink in. God, he was too much. “Come on, princess, who makes you this soaked? Tell me,” he commanded. Y/N desperately needed to reach her high, so she told him what he wanted to hear. “You, sir.”

“Who?” Draco asked again while slamming his hips into her.

Y/N gasped and cried out, “You sir, you make me wet!” Draco smirked. “That’s what I thought,” he grunted. To Y/N’s delight, he began to increase his pace. His face was close to hers; she could feel his breath on her face. Then he hit it, her g-spot. Once the head of his cock touched it, she screamed, letting Draco know he’d found it. He released her wrist and instead wrapped his fingers around her neck, forcing her to look at him. Y/N couldn't move her head as he slammed into her, hitting that spot repeatedly. She felt her climax approaching but was unable to warn Draco. All she could do was take it.

But Draco was perceptive; he knew Y/N was nearing her high. “You gonna cum on my cock, darling? Go on then, cum,” he said. And with that, she was pushed over the edge, crying out as she fell. The world seemed to stop spinning; all Y/N could feel was the electricity running through her body. Every one of her muscles was tense as she endured the waves of pleasure. Draco was nearing his end as well. His thrusts were becoming sloppy, and within thirty seconds, he was releasing inside her. His body jerked with pleasure as his cum filled Y/N’s hot pussy. Draco groaned and let his body fall on top of the woman underneath him.

The pair panted heavily as they came down from their orgasms. When Y/N felt strong enough, she raised a shaky hand to Draco’s face and stroked it softly. He kissed her hand while opening his eyes. “That was incredible,” Y/N breathed, still reeling from what just happened. Draco chuckled lightly. “I’m inclined to agree,” he said.

They were interrupted by a knock at the door. Y/N felt her blood run cold; she looked at Draco, terror on her face. Her boss, however, looked more relaxed than a sleeping baby. “Just a moment,” he called out. Swiftly, he pushed himself off Y/N, reached under her arms, and picked her up. He walked them over to his chair and sat down, the impact forcing his cock deep inside her. Draco then took out his wand and wordlessly summoned the papers back to the top of his desk. “Come in,” he said calmly as he unlocked the door.

Y/N felt her heart drop. She was sitting on Draco Malfoy’s lap, his dick still inside of her, and he just told whoever is outside his door to come in. As quickly as she could, Y/N ran her fingers through her hair, trying to make it appear as though they had not just had rough intercourse. Just as she was pulling down her shirt, the door opened, and Y/N slapped a soft smile onto her face. When she saw who stood in the doorway, she felt bile rise in her throat. There stood Hermione Granger, the current Minister of Magic.

“Hey Malfoy, I was just stopping by to tell you that - oh! Y/N, I-I didn’t know you were here,” Hermione stuttered. Despite her apparent confusion, she didn’t ask why Y/N was on Draco’s lap. “Well, anyway, it’s good you’re both here. I was informed that a prophecy came in today with my name on it. Did you see it, Y/N?” she asked. Y/N gulped and nodded. “I did.” Hermione smiled. “Oh good, well, then you must know where it is, right?” she inquired. Draco gripped her waist, but Y/N ignored her boss and answered Hermione. “I do. Why do you ask?” she questioned with a fake smile on her lips.

“Well, it turns out that it’s not actually my prophecy. See, the Seer was actually talking about someone named Helga Graingle. Apparently, she’s a rather old witch. Or I suppose, was, is the better term. She passed away early this morning,” Hermione told the pair. Draco cleared his throat. “How unfortunate,” he replied. Y/N nodded, “That’s horrible. She didn’t even get to hear her prophecy.”

Hermione sighed. “Yes, I know. It’s a shame. But anyway, I just wanted to let you know about the mix-up. I’ll be on my way now…” she trailed off as her eyes flickered to Y/N’s hips. Obviously, something was up, but the Minister said nothing; she simply nodded her head and slinked out the door, shutting it behind her.

Once she was gone, Y/N let out a sigh of relief. “Merlin,” she muttered. Draco pressed his lips to her neck. “Got lucky, didn’t you, princess?” he taunted. Y/N rolled her eyes and pushed him away lightly. “Shut up, Malfoy.” Draco chuckled and squeezed his arms around her waist. Y/N felt her heart stutter, the things this man did to her.

#draco lucius malfoy #Draco Malfoy #draco malfoy smut #draco malfoy x yn #draco fanfiction #Draco #draco malfoy imagines #draco malfoy x reader #draco imagine #draco smut #harry potter #smut

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chickwiththepurpleguitar · 3 years

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Lilly!!!! Congrats on 500 followers! As for a prompt, how about Willex + Banana? teehee!

Thank you and thanks so much for the prompt!! This is my very first time writing Willex, and even really writing Willie, so this was really fun for me, and I took your random prompt and ran with it lol. I hope you enjoy! Content warning for anxiety.

It becomes a thing kind of by accident.

See, when Alex gets anxious (and not, like, regular, reasonable anxious, but like stupid anxious, like literally nothing is wrong and he KNOWS this but his brain won’t stop telling him he’s in some kind of danger anyway), it helps to have something in his hands. Drumming’s the best option of course, because the blisters on his fingers distract him from how cold and shaky his hands are, and the noise drowns out his own troubled thoughts, and if his heart is racing cause he’s out of breath, then it’s easy to pretend it’s not also racing for literally no reason at all. When he’s away from his drum kit, he just shoves his hands in his pockets and rubs his fists against the fabric, or he twirls his sticks in his hands (though he’s done less of that lately ever since it got out of control once and one of his sticks flew out of his hands and got stuck up Reggie’s nose).

But then one day, Alex and Willie are taking a walk down by the beach, and things are good, really, it’s a nice day and only three people have walked through him and Julie braided Willie’s hair (which just does things to Alex), so by all rights, he should be having a great time.

But as much as he tries to ignore it, Alex just can’t shake the feeling that something is… off. Willie is talking about something—some guy named Tony who’s “not worth shit” apparently—but Alex barely hears him, too lost in the fog steadily rolling over his brain. The sun is a little too bright all of a sudden. The beach is too crowded, even though Alex can’t really feel any of the bodies pressed in around him. Somewhere down the boardwalk, a dog barks, and Alex flinches.

Willie must notice something’s up, because he slows to a stop and hovers a hand above Alex’s shoulder. “Alex? You okay, man?”

Alex swallows, nods, tries to take a deep breath (it doesn’t really work). He might be hyperventilating just a little bit, and there’s sweat dripping down the back of his neck that can’t just be from the sun, and his hands feel tingly and numb, but he manages a shaky, “Y-yeah. I’m—I’m okay.”

Willie frowns, clearly not believing him, which is admittedly fair. Alex can’t help a burn of frustration at his own stupid brain from bubbling up inside his chest. Nothing’s even wrong, he should be having a good day, so why does he feel like the freaking Jaws music is playing in his head? He closes his eyes, realizes standing blind in the middle of the sidewalk only makes it worse (even though it’s not like anyone can knock into him), and opens them again. His hands open and close futilely around the air, but there’s nothing for him to grab onto to ground himself. He’s just wearing a t-shirt, so there’s no pockets to shove his fists through, and he didn’t bring his drumsticks with him (and he’s learned recently that summoning them when he’s anxious doesn’t always end well; the last thing he wants is to accidentally crush himself or Willie with the entirety of his drum kit).

“Okay,” Willie says, stepping in front of Alex so that his view is blocked of everything but Willie. “I’m right here, Lex, okay? Everything’s gonna be fine. Can you tell me what you need? Do you want to go home?”

“No,” Alex says instantly. He doesn’t think he can focus enough to teleport right now, doesn’t want to find out what’ll happen if he tries.

“Okay, that’s totally fine, we’ll stay right here. Can you try to breathe for me?” Willie’s voice is calming enough to cut through the fog at least a little bit. Alex manages a deep, albeit shaky, breath, and Willie’s smile lights up golden. “Good job, man, that was great. Keep doing that if you can, okay?” He holds his hands up. “Touch yes or no?”

“Yes. Oh god, please, yes.” Alex grabs one of Willie’s hands with both of his and immediately starts playing with Willie’s fingers, letting the contact of skin on skin and the physical task of twiddling Willie’s fingers between his own bring him back down a little bit.

Willie gently reaches up the hand Alex isn’t holding and cards it through Alex’s hair, smiling softly. “You know you can ask, right, Lex? You don’t have to wait for me to offer.”

Alex nods. He knows. That doesn’t mean he’s ever gonna do it. “Sorry.”

“Hey, no, none of that.” Willie shifts his hand in Alex’s so that their fingers link together and gives it a reassuring squeeze. “Is there anything else I can do? You good to keep walking?”

“Yeah, I’m good,” Alex says, and even thinks he means it this time. He’s still not 100%, but he’s breathing a little easier, and Willie’s hand in his is grounding, and he’s been walked through like fifteen times just since they’ve been standing here, so yes, he would very much like to keep walking now.

Willie smiles and steps around so they’re standing side by side again, and they continue slowly down the boardwalk, still holding hands. Alex starts to apologize, stops himself, instead just says, “It helps, sometimes, having something to do with my hands, you know?”

Willie shoots him a carefree grin. “I get it, Hotdog. Glad I can be of service.”

Alex blushes, smiling down at their joined hands. When he glances back up, though, Willie’s no longer smiling, instead squinting thoughtfully at Alex’s other hand, empty and still sort of twitching at his side.

“Give me one sec,” Willie says before Alex can ask what’s up, and then disappears. A moment later, he poofs back and presses something into Alex’s hands.

Alex blinks down at it, confused. “Willie. This is a banana.”

Willie shrugs. “It was the first thing I could find.”

But from then on, whenever Alex gets anxious away from his drums, Willie gives him a banana, and Alex turns it around in his hands, scratches off the sticker, picks the peel open from the bottom. And then, once he’s calmed down, he holds Willie’s hand and splits the fruit with him.

Send me a pairing and a prompt to celebrate my 500th follower!

Taglist: @whenweremarried @sunsethimb0s @pink-flame @penguin0613 @fighttoshine @sunsetcurvecuddles @nickalicious @reggiescrookedteeth @brightattheorpheum @queenmolina @spidergirl0325 @jandthephantoms @lexilucacia @sapphossidechick @acnhaddict @cest-la-vie-de-la-lee @sunset-bobby @lenacarstairspotterstewart @moreflowersthanweeds @conversationaltreestump @burntchromas

#jatp #julie and the phantoms #netflixwewantjatps2 #fanfiction #jatp fanfiction #willex #willie nolastname #alex mercer #my fics #prompt fills #reggieshamster #ask

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secretaryunpaid · 3 years

Note

Prompt list I think its fluff number 20 “i’m not playing truth or dare.” can't wait to read 😘

Thank you for the ask, @pixie88 !!!

(Giving myself a pep talk in advance, lol)

Hmmm... fluff... okay, you're gonna make me a fluff writer yet, lol... let's do this...

Pairing: Dahlia & Samuel Dalton

Rating: General

Word Count: 1615 approximately

It was going to be an exciting evening, or so she had hoped. Vivian came for the twins and it was just Sam and Dahlia for the weekend! Sam phoned to tell her to get dressed and that he was on his way home.

We all know where Dahlia's mind went... she was so excited she hurried to dress and put on some hype music to boost her energy... Feeling herself in her daisy yellow halter top and skorts, she did a little dance through the room., while lip syncing the lyrics to Wild Thoughts by Rihanna & Bryson Tiller...

She enters the kitchen to prepare a charcuterie board and other ingredients, she figured on maybe some light eating and a movie in their private home theater room... but really not taking in the movie... She would invade his man cave, and he wouldn’t regret letting her in...

Looking down at the sound of her phone’s notification, she sees the message from Sam saying that he was in the parking garage and would be up soon. Her excitement builds, and she hurries to pour them drinks. Maybe they could finish the night with a rooftop swim... but she didn’t want to jump ahead of herself... she’d need to determine Sam’s energy level after his long hours of work.

She hears the elevator chime and rushes to greet him, handing him his first drink of the night. “Welcome home, baby... I’ve missed you!” Planting a soft kiss on her lips, he takes the drink before intertwining their fingers, leading her back inside.

“You’re in a great mood! And this yellow... Mhmm! Do a spin for me...”

She spins slowly so that he can take in his eye’s content before teasing, “I thought we could play a little ‘Driving Miss Daisy” tonight... See what I did there? You know, cause I’m in yellow...” Realizing the insinuation has gone overhead, “Yellow... like daisies...”

Sam finally catches on, realizing that she isn’t asking him to chaufer her anywhere, but instead drive her in the way she enjoys most.

They reach the dining table where she has the charcuterie board set, and Sam kisses her temple, “You were really excited about this evening weren’t you? Looks like enough for everyone.”

Dahlia’s happy face turns puzzled... “Everybody? Isn’t ‘everybody’ already here?”

He kisses her again answering, “Well... I thought I would try something new tonight... so I invited a few guests over... for a game night.”

“Has someone snatched my real husband? Game night with guests? Color me very surprised!... But I got all cute for you, I set up the man cave for a movie night, thinking we could finish with a late night swim...”

“I’ll still have all the energy you need from me, but... “ He kisses her teasingly as he tickles her, “We’ll have company, and your plans sound like we need to wrap things up quickly... So we need to plan this just right... I’m not trying to disappoint my lady in any way.”

Before you even get started, “I’m not playing truth or dare.”

Sam chuckles, asking her why not. “Come on... how bad can it get? ... Don’t I know everything I need to know ... or every dark or dirty thing that you’ve ever done?”

Dahlia smiles through the question, internally screaming... He can never know the full truth... He wouldn’t want to ever lay eyes on me again... “Why not pictionary or even ... ugggh... monopoly?”

“What have you got against monopoly?,” he laughs.

“Only never being able to keep anything that I buy, and going to jail...it’s like that’s the only home that I get to keep!”

Sam laughs questioningly with a huff, “Home?... You’re referring to jail as home?”

“Well... it takes FOR-ever to get out of... if I even do... so... Yeah!!!”

“Okay... so what can I do to convince you on “Truth or Dare”? Cause it’s one of my favorites other than “Never Have I Ever”... Oh, we could-”

“Oh, HELL NO! Not that game either,” she stresses, shaking her head adamantly...

His eyes alight with intrigue he pleads to have his way. “Please... I won’t make you run through Central Park in your birthday suit...” Kissing her neck, he laughs... “Just through the lobby, see ... easy.”

Playfully shoving him away, she laughs. “See, this is why! This is why I won’t play truth or dare with you!”

“Well, it’s game night... Those are my picks... Tell me yours and we will find a way to choose,” he says, coming up behind her, locking her in his embrace, figuring if he gets her ‘motivated’ she will let him have his way.

“Well...I do have some dirty dice... We could get a bucket of ice... I can...” Reaching to whisper against his ear, she teases of the many naughty things that could be done... IF... if he’d call off inviting the others, that is...

Robin and Jenny are coming over... plus, I invited a few more couples to come over...” Raising a brow as he confesses, Sam waits for Dahlia’s reaction. “Really !!!! This is so unlike you... It’s usually just us and the kids... and your mom occasionally ... What’s changed?... Wait... Who are you, and what have you done with my husband?,” giving Sam a sideways glance before grinning, her beautiful smile warming his heart.

“I started seeing a therapist again.”

Her expression sharply changed from playful to deeply concerned. Her heart sank, wondering if he was having second thoughts about their marriage, but felt he couldn’t talk to her about it... “A therapist ?!!!? But.. why?”

“I was starting to have panic attacks... I didn’t want to distract you from your “skinsulate” development and trials. I know how important that has been to you. I’m proud that you are making such headway with it... I won’t take from that with my drama.”

“Is that the truth? It’s not... being married to me is it?” Hesitant to make eye contact, wringing her hands together, attempting to brace herself for heartache. “But you can always talk to me, love... about anything... I don’t judge or react unless you are confessing to cheating on me... then it’s an open forum other than that. You know me, Sam...,” peering into his eyes, searching for truth...

“Well, maybe we can {kiss}... talk {kiss}... more about it later {deeper kiss, his hands now probing under the hem of her skorts }... cause...” He begins to pull away, “Company has just arrived... I just heard the elevator chime...”

Heated and now left hanging, Dahlia groans in frustration, but pulls him back for a final kiss before he goes to greet them. “Husband... we are finishing this later!,” she calls after him.

Jenny comes in first, making her way to Dahlia, hugging her tightly before leaning to wave the bottle of Duce, “Let’s start this game night right! Where are the glasses?”

Next Robin comes in, followed by the other couples... He teases Sam, “You must be a fool in love... the great recluse is now hosting game nights in his home ???” Then his eyes land on Jenny, who immediately blushes at the memory of their wild night together.

The other couples show off the things they brought for tonight, asking which games they’ll be playing collectively, sounding like a room of overly excited grade school children. Robin exclaims confidently, “Truth or Dare... All night, baby !!!”

The group shows mixed emotions, but the majority sing out together,

“I’m not playing truth or dare!”

Each in turn explaining the awful dares and mind blowing truths revealed in past games, as Dahlia and Jenny finally join them with a tray of drinks for everyone. “What’d we miss?,” she asks as she introduces herself to the couples she doesn’t know.

Robin reminds Sam of the dare he had from a time they played before... He had to rap his infomercial for their upcoming project... Mason, Sr was pissed, because it was being recorded live...

Sam rubs the memory and embarrassment from his face although the can’t help but laugh over the expression on their parent’s faces ... along with key investors for the project.. “I wasn’t going to let you hold that over my head Robin... I had to do it! It took me weeks of apologies and ass kissing to fix that situation... And it even forced me to ... ahem... perform outside of the norm...”

Robin continues to blast Sam’s dares, telling of the he dared Sam to wear a disguise and pretend to be an assistance of Robin’s that had Tourette Syndrome, constantly blurting out “R-R-Robin’s the the the the ... Eeek!(high pitched) M-Man!” Everyone turns to Sam before snapping their heads back to Robin, who simply throws his hands up.

“No disrespect to the disabled... just knocking Sammy down a peg or two or fifty,” he laughs,”Being Mr. Perfect and “can do no wrong” in everyone’s eyes...he deserved it... Can’t handle the consequence, don’t play the game...,” he says callously, shrugging through his continued laughter. “Show ‘em the tick Sam... go ahead!” Robin is near breathless and in tears...

Dahlia swats Sam’s shoulder, shocked that he would do such a thing. “Yet, you still insist on this for game night?... Oh, I didn’t miss the first dare mentioned either... we will be discussing those performances later once everyone has left, Mr. Dalton,” she smirks knowingly.

Robin finally yells over, “So Dahlia... We’re playing-”

“I’m not playing Truth or Dare! Pack it in Robin!!! ”

Everyone laughs, and continues discussing what will be played while eating, enjoying the hell out of the stories told and taunting each other. Dahlia makes her way over to Sam, whispering softly against his ear, “Still not playing, but ... I dare you to slip off for a quickie to hold me over til later!”

“Umm, guys, I think we ran out of ... ICE, we’ll be right back!,” Sam yells out to the group as he’s dragging Dahlia from the room. Everyone looks puzzled, except for Jenny and Robin, looking towards the large tub of ice on the table next to the bottles of champagne.

Robin makes his way over to stand next to Jenny, giving her a smoldering look before asking, “Truth or Dare?” ...

~~~~~ @pixie88, It’s not smut, but... ~~~~~

I just may learn this fluff writing thing, yet...

#@Becoming Mrs. Dalton #fluff prompts #@pixie88 #@aussieez #@ezekielbhandarivalleros #the nanny affair #@prompt writing

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yikestripes · 4 years

Text

Satisfying

@dissatisfactionbuthuman here you go !! i really ran with this request LOL

i actually have the cracking thing i was referring to- it’s called hip dysplasia but there’s also a shoulder type (i have both)

request: Omg can you please do a fic where Spence has a kink for something super common for the reader to do like stretching or something and she keeps doing it around him accidentally!?

word count: 1,566

warnings: talks of kinks? nothing really, sliiiight hints at smut.

You raised your arms high above your head, hearing a satisfying crack come from your shoulder joints. You resumed your paperwork, not knowing that you had caught Spencer’s attention. A small blush crept up to his cheeks as he turned back to his own work, trying to ignore the thoughts that were itching at the back of his mind. You rose shortly later, a resounding crack from your hip sounded as you walked past Spencer’s desk, and he swore you started doing it on purpose. You two had only been dating for about 2 months, after a long drawn out confession had taken place one night after an especially long jet ride home. There was no way you knew about one of Spencer’s most guarded secrets yet; he never told anyone about his cracking kink, and he definitely didn’t intend to scare you off so quickly by telling you now.

The only question was, did you somehow find out and now were trying to tease him with it? There was no way. He had made sure not to tell anyone else in the office and unless you were a mind reader, there was no way. He abandoned the thought for the better part of an hour before you were all called to the conference room for a briefing.

Good. Spencer thought. This will definitely take my mind away from everything- especially her. You sat by his side and let your hand come to rest on his forearm, something you would do every time you were near each other. It was a simple gesture, whether it was to remind her that Spencer was all hers, other women, or just to remind herself that he was still there, it didn’t really matter. Spencer took your hand under the table to save yourselves from a look from Hotch regarding your ability to work together, which you’d received more times than either of you would like to admit.

You looked back and smiled at Spencer, who was chewing his lip as he was clearly thinking about something that was not related to the case. You squeezed his hand gently to grab his attention, but he shook his head slightly and offered you a tightlipped smile. He was acting strange, especially for Spencer, but you shrugged it off and pretended to pay attention to the rest of the case. You could study up on the plane; first, you had to figure out what was bothering your boyfriend.

As soon as Hotch announced wheel’s up, you were already out of the conference room, sitting on Spencer’s desk with your go bag in hand.

“What’s up, Spence?” You asked, raising your eyebrows.

“N-nothing,” He said, offering you a real smile. You narrowed your eyes at his retreating back, but decided it was better not to push it.

The jet ride was completely uneventful; you, Spencer, JJ, and Emily traded theories back and forth about the latest sicko while discussing whether or not the latest kidnapped victim was dead or not. You announced your desire for coffee, standing up and going to the back of the plane; another crack from your hip rang out as you felt a small release in your back. You had joint problems that stemmed from sports and an undiagnosed disorder that affected a few if not all of your biggest joints, including your shoulders and hips. This was the cause for all of the popping and cracking every time you moved a stiffened joint.

Little did you know, you were driving Spencer absolutely wild- more so than usual, that is.

“Hey, JJ- Has (Y/N) a-always, um, cracked like that?” He asked, trying to make his desires less obvious.

“What do you mean?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Um, well, whenever she stands up after sitting for some time or moves her arm suddenly…” Spencer trailed off.

“I guess so. She told me that she has some thing in her joints that cause that, why? Does it freak you out?” She grinned.

Spencer’s eyes widened.

“U-uh,” He swallowed hard. “I mean I guess so, yeah. Is that weird?” He lowered his voice.

“Not at all! It used to absolutely DISGUST my cousin whenever i’d crack my neck or my back around her. It’s some sort of phobia I think,” Spencer breathed a sigh of relief when he realized what she was saying.

“What’s disgusting?” You asked, handing Spencer the other mug in your hand.

“Oh, we were just talking about how cracking joints disgust some people. Our dear doctor apparently isn’t too fond of it!” She said with a laugh.

“You never told me that,” You said, suddenly feeling slightly self conscious.

“Well I-I never thought about bringing it up before, I guess.” He took a long sip from the mug before excusing himself. You burned holes into the back of his head as he headed towards the bathroom.

“That was weird.” You muttered, reopening the case file.

***

“Looks like our unsub decided to dump the body in a hurry,” Spencer announced, pulling on a pair of gloves.

“Yeah, this is a pretty foot-traffic heavy area so I guess someone was coming.” You responded.

“It completely forced them to change their M.O, they didn’t have time for the rest of their usual ritual.”

Your knee cracked as you crouched down next to the body, grimacing at the sound.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered, looking up at Spencer. He rubbed a gloved hand on your shoulder blade and smiled.

“No need to apologize, my love. Hey- what’s that shiny thing?” He pointed to a dangling silver necklace that was hooked on a nearby branch.

“Oh, this must have been the necklace she was wearing the morning of the kidnapping. It’s amethyst,” You placed it in a bag and handed it to one of the crime scene investigators, removing a glove to call Hotch.

The rest of the investigation had been pretty easy, the unsub had been lingering around the dumpsite for a little longer than he should have, just to get off from his crime a few more times. You stood outside of the small farmhouse, looking over the sea of flashing lights and reporters that surrounded the crime scene.

You tilted your head and earned a satisfying crack from your neck, and did the same on the other side.

“Oof,” Spencer whispered, grimacing.

“Does it really bother you that much? I didn’t realize you were standing right-” Spencer cut you off with a kiss, mid sentence.

“It doesn’t bother me at all.”

“But JJ said on the plane-” He placed his hands on your shoulders, and leaned forward so your foreheads were touching.

“I was lying, (Y/N). I don’t hate the sound of cracking, I, uh…” He trailed off and licked his lips, breaking eye contact. Your eyes widened as he looked down at the ground.

“Spencer Reid do you have a k-” Spencer’s own eyes widened as he clapped his gloveless hand over your mouth.

“Shhh!” He said as you glared.

“What?”

“I don’t want the entire state of Texas to know!” He hissed. You rolled your eyes.

“Alright alright, I won’t say anything. How long has this been going on? Since before we were dating? My joints crack literally ALL the time.” You thought back to earlier that morning, when he could barely take his eyes off of you while you were doing paperwork. You had gone back and forth to the copy machine probably 3 separate times, various joints in your legs cracking each time you stood up. Spencer swallowed and offered a small grin.

“Does it bother you?” He asked, his brown eyes gleaming.

“No! No. It’s absolutely fine. I just wish I had more control of when it happens,” You lowered your voice and cocked a single eyebrow. Spencer bit his lip when Morgan started calling out to you from across the field.

“Hey, Lovebirds, get over here! We’re leaving.” You winked at Spencer and walked in Morgan’s direction, pausing to crouch quickly, earning you a small crack. Spencer dropped his jaw and kept close behind you, causing you to giggle.

“You’re the worst.” He muttered in your ear.

“Mmmmhm,” You hummed.

You boarded the plane shortly after, sitting down in the back, and immediately taking off your shoes and curling your legs underneath you. Spencer sat next to you and pulled out a book. Very quickly into the flight, you got bored. You looked around the cabin and the majority of the team was asleep, save for Hotch, who was filling out the remaining paperwork with the help of Rossi. Spencer was still reading beside you, running his thumb across your knuckles without breaking his concentration. Suddenly, you felt the urge to crack your fingers. You grinned mischievously and took your hand back.

You started by cracking your index finger, which he either didn’t hear or actively chose to ignore. You cracked your middle finger and ring finger, which caused a blush to rise in his cheeks. You cracked the rest of your hand and got to work on the other when he finally gave you the attention you were searching for. He set his book down on the table in front of you and looked at you, and raised his eyebrows. You grinned wider and wiggled your eyebrows.

“Later, we’ll be home in 20 minutes tops.” He whispered in your ear. You saved the rest of your cracking for when you got home, because you had a ton pent up.

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taehyungs-perm · 4 years

Text

strawberry girl pt 4

taehyung x reader; college au; childhood best friends to lovers au; jock!fratboy taehyung

genre: fluff; major angst lol

word count: 11k

summary: i can pretend i don’t miss you. i can pretend i dont care. all i want to do is kiss you. what a shame you’re not here.

Part 1 here ; Part 2 here; part 3 here; part 5

playlist vibes

i like me better | lauv

get you | daniel caesar

japanese denim | daniel caesar

lovers | anna of the north

comfort crowd | conan gray

idontwannabeyouanymore | billie eilish

It was probably not ideal to start your morning by sobbing in the lap of your best friend, but it be like that sometimes.

Hana was softly combing the little strands of hair out of your face, “_________, it’s okay. Why are you so upset about this?”

You rolled over so you could see Hana, brushing the hair out of your face, “Because Hana, I told you what happened last time. I fell for him and it hurt me so much. I was trying so hard to avoid this.”

She looked at you with a serious look in her eyes, “__________ you can't choose what feelings you feel. But you can choose how you act. You have to tell people how you feel when you feel it. You missed that chance two years ago but you have it again now. This is a good thing. Tell Taehyung how you feel.”

You sat upright, looking at her seriously, “Hana, it’s not that simple. He probably doesn’t like me back. And if I confess and he says he doesn’t like me like that, then what? I’ve ruined our friendship over something that doesn’t even matter.”

“It does matter! Your feelings do matter. And that won’t happen. I’ve seen the way he looks at you when you aren’t paying attention. He definitely likes you. Stop over thinking.”

“I’m not overthinking. If anything, I’m not thinking enough. I just should keep my mouth shut and hope this goes away.”

Hana shook her head, “What the fuck will that do? You’ll just sadly pine over him from a distance while he continues to fuck the rest of campus. Will that make you happy? Seeing him do that?”

“Hana, if Taehyung and I were meant to be, we would have been by now. But we aren’t. We are two different people and he just doesn’t see me like that.”

“And I’m telling you that he does! Even Jungkook has noticed the way Taehyung acts around you. It’s obvious to everyone but you.”

“It was just like this last time too, Hana. I thought he was so into me, but he wasn’t. He was into some other girl the whole time. It made me feel like a piece of shit. Like I was worthless and that I created this romance all in my head. I’m sick of waiting for love and I realized my life isn't anything special.”

She put her hands on your shoulders, “You have to start romanticizing your life. You have to start taking risks and do things for yourself. If you keep being afraid of what could happen, life will continue to pass you by and all the little things that make it so beautiful will continue to go unnoticed. You can’t keep wallowing in self pity. You need to do something about your life and for once not let it fuck you over. This isn’t just about Taehyung. This about how you live your life. I know you better than you think __________.You have to start thinking of yourself as the main character. You need to change your mentality of thinking you’re worthless and not enough.”

You sighed deeply, knowing everything she’s saying is so true, “I know it okay. I know it’s the fucking capitalist misogynistic society that cultivates these ideas of insecurity and women and profits off of it to create an endless cycle of ‘I don’t feel enough’. And I want to get to that point where I can feel like I’m enough on my own. But it’s hard.”

Hana pulled you into a hug, “________ I know it’s hard. I just don’t want all of your fears and insecurities to stop you from achieving your dreams and going after things you want.”

You pulled away from her, “Do you really think I should tell him?”

She nodded excitedly, “I really, really do. Tonight is the perfect chance.”

You let out a deep sigh, releasing all the pent up tension in your body, “Okay. Tonight.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You and Hana made your way through the somehow already crowded lodge.

“God, Jungkook is such an idiot. I told him not to invite too many people because he only has one house, but guess what?” Hana said huffing as she firmly gripped her duffle.

“What?” You were following closely behind her so as to not get stuck in the crowd.

“He somehow got permission to use his neighbor’s lodge too. As long as everything is exactly how it was. Which there’s no fucking way that’ll happen.”

You nodded in agreement. There were already too many fucking people here. But to be fair, you and Hana did arrive late. Most people arrived in the early afternoon to go skiing and tubing. You and Hana decided to catch up on homework and studying and arrived in the early evening instead. Hana ensured that both of you dressed in cute outfits because she really wanted to take photos for her Instagram.

Hana was wearing an emerald green satin tank top with black skinny jeans with black strappy heels.

You rarely wore dresses because the lack of practicality with no pockets infuriated you but Hana somehow convinced you to buy the maxi length black floral dress you were wearing. It had thin straps so you paired the dress with a black long sleeve shirt and white sneakers.

She dragged you upstairs. “Jungkook gave us this room,” Hana said, taking you down the hall.

“Us?” You asked snarkily.

“Okay, in theory I’m supposed to stay in this room with you.”

“But?”

“But...I’ll stay with Jungkook and Jungkook’s roommate will stay here.”

You already knew where this was going and you felt your anxiety growing. You rubbed your temples, “Don’t tell me..”

“Taehyung said he’s perfectly okay with it so...”, she said through a large grin.

“Hana, I told you. I just-”

“And I told you! He likes you too! This is your chance. Your opportunity!! You two are so cute together. You just need to talk to him about your feelings,” she said pushing you into the room. Thankfully, there were two beds. You felt like you couldn’t handle another night next to Taehyung. You might literally have a heart attack, feeling his body that close to yours again.

“I don’t know Hana. I don’t know if tonight is the right time,” you said, setting your duffle bag on your bed.

You were about to continue before you heard a knock on the door. At the doorway was Taehyung and Jungkook, the causes of your incoming migraine.

Jungkook walked over to Hana and enveloped her in a big hug. “I missed you, love,” he said as he kissed her forehead.

“Miss you too,” Hana mumbled from his embrace.

Your heart yearned with longing at this interaction. How you so badly you wanted someone to love you. How so badly you wanted Taehyung to love you back. You then remembered that he was in fact standing right in front of you.

You smiled awkwardly at him. His fluffy curly hair was covering his eyes a bit. He was dressed in a somewhat sheer black floral shirt tucked into black skinny jeans. He looked like a model. He waved recognizing that you were a bit uncomfortable.

Jungkook, still with Hana in his embrace, left the room, saying something about how she needed to see the beer pong table in the basement.

“Hey,” Taehyung said casually, leaning against the door entrance.

You felt your heart beating fast. God, did he always make you this uneasy?

“Hi,” you squeaked. Oh my god. Why are you acting like this? Can't you just be chill?

He laughed, “Are you okay?”

Be chill. Act normal. “I’m fine. Just tired. I was at the library since you left this morning.” You were trying to distract yourself as you started unpacking some things from your duffle. He walked over and sat on your bed next to your duffle.

“Hmm. Seems like we’ll be spending another night together,” he said, grinning wickedly.

Your cheeks reddened at his words. You cleared your throat, ”Well, you’ll be sleeping in your own bed. So not really.” You continued to take out items from your bag, so you didn’t have to make eye contact with him.

He angled his face in front of your bag so you had to look at his doe eyes, “Oh really. It’s just that after last night, I don’t know if I can sleep without you next to me again. By the way, I usually sleep shirtless.”

You immediately felt your face flush and the textbook that you were holding (you brought it just in case you got bored) slipped from your hands, thudding loudly on the wooden floor.

He gave you an infuriating smile as he leaned down and picked up your textbook.

“Sure everything is fine?” He said handing you the book.

“I’m perfectly fine! We should go downstairs,” you said hastily as you set the book on the bed.

“Okay, let’s go,” he said standing up.

“Wait lemme fix my hair,” you said glancing in a mirror. It looked like you just woke up. Which to be fair, you kinda did sleep the entire way to the lodge.

You undid your braid and pulled it into a ponytail. You turned to him and he frowned.

“What?” You said, feeling self conscious.

He walked over to you and pulled the hair tie out of your hair, “I like it when your hair is down.” He secured your dark pink scrunchie around his wrist.

Your heart fluttered. Wait, did that mean he didn’t like when your hair was styled in other ways?

He pulled your hand and gave you that contagious smile, “I know what you’re thinking. I do think you look good in different hair styles. I like it when you wear braids or ponytails. But you rarely wear your hair down. I want you to know that I like that too.”

You looked down at the wooden flooring, trying to hide your smile, “Fuck off. I could care less what you think.”

“Ayy, there’s my girl. Now c’mon you look pretty let’s go!” Taehyung said, leading you down the stairs.

It seemed like time had no concept here as everyone was drinking and dancing as if it were midnight. Taehyung led you to the basement where there were somehow even more people. The colored lights were flashing and the music was blaring.

You found your friends sitting on the couches towards the back. Hana was sitting on Jungkook's lap next to Yoongi and Hobi. Even though you technically came with him, Taehyung’s presence was making you overly jittery so you opted to sit in the free seat next to Jimin. He gave you a cheerful smile and you tried not to look at Taehyung as he sat opposite of you two. Hana glared at you in frustration when she saw your seat choice. You responded by flipping her off and turned to talk to Jimin.

Your conversation with Jimin was cut off by Jungkook exclaiming, “Okay, let’s play truth or dare.”

Hana scoffed, “Are you kidding Jungkook? That game is for children.”

“Not the way we play it,” he said, raising his eyebrows.

You immediately shook your head, “I’ll sit this out.”

Jimin whined at you, “Cmon ________ you have to play.”

You shook your head, laughing, “In your fucking dreams.”

Jimin stroked his chin with his hand, thinking hard, “You have to play otherwise...”

Hana chimed in, “Otherwise I’ll hide your textbooks.”

You narrowed your eyes at her, “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Try me bitch” Hana said with a smirk.

You sighed, giving up because you knew she actually would do it, “Fine but if it starts getting fucking weird I’m leaving.”

The dares got weird pretty fast.

Jin was dared to lick whipped cream off of Yoongi's leg. Hobi and Namjoon were dared to go skinny dipping in the pool. Taehyung had to sit on Namjoon’s lap for the rest of the round. Jungkook revealed almost too many truths about himself, talking about his fantasy threesomes and his kinks. Hana was dared to do body shots off of Jungkook (she seemed a little too excited for that). Jimin was dared to remove his shirt for the rest of the game.

Luckily you had only been asked two times and chosen truth both times. Namjoon and Hobi were nice enough to ask questions that weren’t too exposing. However, things started going downhill once it was Hana’s turn again. You swore you saw her eyes glitter with mischievousness.

“_________, You already used up your two truths, right?”

Fuck, you forgot about the two truths only rule.

Jimin piped up, “Yep! She did.”

God, fuck Park Jimin for being such a boy scout. You nodded weakly. Your heart started to pound. You knew she was going to say something stupid. You uneasily glanced over at Taehyung. He had been suspiciously quiet to you all night, but you also were actively avoiding him.

Hana cleared her throat, making sure to get everyone’s attention, “Okay so _________ I dare you,” she smiled widely and you knew you were fucked, “I dare you to make out with Taehyung.”

Your mouth gaped open. She didn’t. You looked at Taehyung and his face was almost as shocked as yours.

You chuckled nervously, side eyeing Taehyung, “No, no.”

Taehyung spoke softly, “Nah she doesn’t have to if she doesn’t want to.”

Jungkook laughed loudly, clearly having a great time at the expense of your misery, “It’s the rules. She has to. Other people had to do way worse tonight.”

You felt your face heating up and your heart was beating faster with anxiety.

Jimin was trying to help the situation, “How about they go in the guest room so it won’t be as awkward.”

Hana pondered this for a moment, “You have to send a picture then. We need evidence that you guys actually kissed.”

You tried protesting but Jimin physically pulled you off the couch while Hobi did the same to Taehyung.

“Guys, guys, how about you give me another dare? I promise I’ll do that one. Just give me a pass,” you pleaded as Jimin dragged you to the guest room.

Your pleas went unheard as Jimin and Hobi pushed you and Taehyung into the guest room with the rest of your friends following behind. Once Jungkook slammed the door close, you tried pressing against the door but it wouldn’t budge. You sighed and dropped to the ground.

“C'mon guys just let us out,” Ttaehyung tried to say in a serious voice, leaning against the door.

“Kiss and then we will let you out,” Jungkook shouted through the door.

Taehyung ran his hands through his hair and sat next to you, “We can just wait it out. They’ll let us out eventually.”

You nodded and buried your face in your hands. Then you heard chanting outside the room “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!”

Oh my god, I’m going to literally murder Hana. I am not going to do this right now.

He leaned next to you and whispered quietly, “I know you don’t wanna do this so let’s just sit here and wait. It’s okay, don’t let what they are saying get to you.”

You looked at him and felt your heart swell. God, you were so in love with him.

The best you could hope for was that they get tired and give up. However, It had been like 10 minutes and the chants were still going strong

You looked at him, desperate, “What the fuck do we do?”

He chuckled nervously, “Um...we could kiss?”

You looked at him. You could but this isn’t what you wanted. You wanted him to want you because he liked you, not because of some game.

You felt your anxiety come to a point where it was overwhelming and you weren’t thinking properly so you said rather forcefully, “No!”

His puppy dog eyes lost its spark. He dropped his head, “Oh.. ok. I know you think I’m really annoying or whatever but I didn’t think you hated me.” He sounded hurt.

You groaned, shutting your eyes in frustration, “Ugh it’s not like that.” God, he was totally misinterpreting the whole situation.

Taehyung looked at you, clearly confused, “Then what is it like? Cause it seems like you’re so repulsed by the idea of kissing me.”

Then without thinking, you frustratingly yelled, “Oh my god, I just don’t want it to happen like this!”

Your eyes widened in realization of what you said.

You began to stumble out your words, “I mean like I just think it’s weird because we are so platonic and like it’s weird and I think we can forget everything I just said.”

Your words were becoming a train wreck and you couldn’t watch the disastrous scene unfolding in front of you.

He stared at you, wide eyed. He leaned his head against the wall, completely silent.

Oh my god, I need to fucking get out. You looked around the room and saw a small window at the top of the opposite wall, next to the bed. Bingo.

You glanced over at Taehyung. He was on his phone, texting. He probably thinks I’m a fucking psycho.

You tightened the laces on your shoes and walked over to the dresser next to the bed. You climbed on top of the dresser and then you pushed on the window hard. It creaked open

You heard Taehyung's voice behind you, “_________, what the fuck are you doing?”

“I just need some fresh air you know. I just need to do this really fast.” You pushed the window fully open and you felt the cool air of the night press against your face

You were able to reach your arms through the window and once you got a good grip on the grass, you began to hoist yourself up.

“_________! What are you doing?” You couldn’t look back at Taehyung, but he sounded very confused and shocked.

“Um I just really need to go. I'm feeling so claustrophobic,” you struggled the words out as you pushed yourself through the window. Once one of your legs made it through, you began crawling out the window, “Ow! Why are there so many fucking rocks?”

You hadn’t realized that while you were struggling to crawl out the window, Taehyung had shouted to your friends on the other side of the door about your antics.

You heard voices fill up the room and Hana’s voice yell, “_________ get the fuck down here! You could get hurt! What are you doing?”

Great, this is exactly how I wanted the night to go. But it was too late, you were already more than halfway out.

“It’s fine.” You shouted back, “I’m okay!”

You exclaimed a cheer of victory once you were able to make it through the fucking window. You stood up and looked down at your clothes. Your dress was caked in mud. This is so great. Your life was a fucking mess.

You looked around and realized you were by the pool. You desperately hoped none of your friends would come up looking for you. You dusted off the dirt from your dress and walked around the pool. You walked into the kitchen and breathed out a sigh of relief when you didn’t recognize anyone there. Then you heard Taehyung’s familiar voice and immediately ducked behind the kitchen island.

You glanced up and sighed when you saw him with Jennie. She was smiling and had her arm wrapped around his neck. He was keeping his distance with him trying to pull her arm away from her. You didn’t wanna stick around any longer because you were worried you would see something that would upset you. You made your way back to your room upstairs.

Obviously seeing Taehyung with Jennie hurt you, but what could you do? They had history, real history and you were simply Taehyung's friend. How could someone like you ever complete with someone like Jennie? You loved Taehyung but how could that even compare what Jennie could offer him. He said to you that he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend, just sex and Jennie was giving him exactly that. It was so fucking stupid of you to think you could confess to him.

Once you got to your room, you changed into black sweatpants and a simple gray tee shirt. You grabbed a towel and headed to the empty hot tub in the back of the house.

Finally a spot where there’s no one and where no one will find me.

You rolled up your pants and soaked your legs in the hot water. You pulled out your phone and started reading the new book you started this week, Malcom X’s autobiography.

It felt really relaxing and peaceful to simply be by yourself for a while. Being social situations always drained you out a lot. You became so absorbed in your reading that you didn’t notice Taehyung walking up to the hot tub.

“Hey strawberry girl,” he said right into your ear.

You got startled by his closeness, almost dropping your phone, “Oh my god, you’re so annoying.”

“So...what happened? Why the fuck did you crawl out of a window?” He asked, concerned

The million fucking dollar question. Time to play it off chill. “I dunno. It just got kinda overwhelming. I told you I was getting claustrophobic.”

You obviously couldn’t tell him you were so fucking afraid of your feelings toward him and how you couldn’t possibly kiss him (game or not) because he most likely doesn’t like you back.

Luckily, he didn’t press further “Yea, it’s actually really nice and quiet out here. Can I sit with you here?”

You nodded and he sat next to you, not dipping his feet in the water.

“I’m so fucking sore from all the practices and games this week,” Taehyung said, stretching his shoulder.

“You should get in the hot tub. It'll relax and soothe your muscles,” you said still reading on your phone, not looking up at him.

He stood up, “That’s a good idea.”

You assumed he would agree and then go and grab his swim trunks. Except Taehyung didn’t do that.

You heard a light clanking noise and looked up at him. He was taking off his belt and unzipping his pants right in front of you. You felt your entire face redden, mortified at what he was doing, “Taehyung. what are you doing?” You said averting your gaze.

“I’m getting in the hot tub?”

“Go and get your swim shorts!”

“Nah, fuck that. Don’t worry _________, I’m not going in nude.”

Thank god. You don’t know what you would’ve done if he decided to do that.

You peeked at him from the corner of your eyes. He was wearing blue boxers and he was unbuttoning his floral shirt. He luckily was wearing a black short sleeve shirt underneath. He had really nice calves, tanned and well defined.

Taehyung stepped into the hot tub and let out a deep moan. Your face reddened at the sound.

Then, your eyes met. Then, all while giving you a deep stare, Taehyung reached behind his neck to pull his shirt off. You felt your face flush even further. He has to know what he’s doing to me. He has to know that he’s riling me up with all of these moves.

You gulped at the sight of his prominent collar bones and honey colored skin. You tore your eyes away from him and tried to concentrate on your book.

It didn’t work because Taehyung's suspiciously quiet presence unnerved you.

You set your phone done and raised your eyebrows at him, “What?”

“What? I haven’t said anything”

“Exactly. You’re being quiet. Which is weird.”

“You said you liked how peaceful it was out here. So I wanted to let you enjoy it.”

“Whatever. It’s weird when you're quiet,” you sloshed your legs in the water.

“_________?” Taehyung wasn’t looking at you anymore, he was staring at the water.

“Yea,”

“Why haven’t you had a boyfriend?”

Ouch.

“Why are you asking me that?” you said a bit hurt.

“I didn’t mean it to come off as mean. I’m just curious. Because, I don’t know, you say you want love. But did you go after it?”

“Why are you thinking of that?”

“Well, cause I dunno. I never thought about love. Or getting a girlfriend. But on the way here Namjoon hyung and Jungkook were just talking about how great it is. Being in love and having someone to love. And someone loving you back. And Jin hyung said he has met someone as well but he’s keeping it lowkey. And then you talked about how you want love too. That’s why you’ve waited. I know you've had crushes. But I don’t know why you haven’t gone for it yet. Or why you haven’t had a boyfriend yet.”

You stared at your feet in the water. He wasn’t trying to be mean. He just wanted to know about your life. You felt like you should be more honest with taehyung. He was always so genuine with you.

“I don’t know Taehyung. There’s so many reasons.”

“What are they?”

You gave a cold laugh, “No one has ever liked me like that. So there’s that. Then I’m scared. I’m scared of opening up to someone and they leave me. I talk a lot of shit I guess for someone who has never been in a relationship. I want love but I guess I realized love doesn’t come without heartbreak. So that’s what scares me. But I guess it’s fun to romanticize something that’ll never happen for me.”

“What are you talking about? Are you saying you’ll never fall in love?”

“I’m saying no one will ever love me like that. So I can say whatever I want about wanting love and a boyfriend. Because that won’t happen.”

He looked at you, astonished, “________ what the fuck? Are you being for real?”

You exhaled deeply. You knew he wouldn’t get it. Taehyung has never been in your situation. He’s always been wanted, adored, loved. You’ve never experienced anything like that.

“Yes Tae. I’m being serious. I’m not really looking for sympathy or anything because I’ve accepted it but I know guys don’t really like me. I know why, but I’m not going to change myself for a guy. It’s just the facts are there, Taehyung. I’m almost twenty and no guy has ever been interested in me. So it’s just whatever now. It’s kinda blessing though. I can just focus on school and not get distracted or sidetracked by any guy.”

He scooched over time where your legs were dangling. He held your hand that was planted firmly against the concrete.

“________ please don’t think like that. You deserve love. Stop saying that you don’t. And you will find it. I promise you. I don’t know why you think guys don’t like you but I swear, you are literally perfect the way you are and I’m so glad you didn’t change for anyone. Your strawberry boy is out there. And he’s probably the most perfect guy to exist.”

You felt tears welling up in your eyes. Your strawberry boy did exist. And he was the one holding your hand. You didn’t want anyone else. You wanted him. You wanted Kim Taehyung.

You reflexively made a joke, just to move away from the fact that you were about to cry over his words, “I guess. You’ll have to beat his ass if he doesn’t like strawberries tho”

Taehyung laughed, “Don’t worry. I’m always here to beat anyone’s ass for you.”

He rested his back against the edge and looked up into the night sky.

“So... are you into Jennie? Is that why you’re thinking about love and girlfriends?” you asked cautiously. You honestly had no idea why you asked this question. You didn’t even want to know the answer.

“Haha no. It’s just...I dunno I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. I’ve always said I didn’t want a girlfriend but I don’t even know why I’ve had that mentality. But now.. I think I want that.”

“Want what?”

“That closeness, that dependability, that love”

“Then what’s stopping you?”

“The right girl I guess.”

You winced at those words. Were you not the right girl?

Trying to distract yourself, you pressed further, “I mean you dated Yeji did that not count?”

“No, it counted. But our relationship was definitely highschool. It wasn’t....deep I guess. The way Jungkook talks about Hana...I know I never felt that in my relationship with Yeji.”

“I’m sure you can find a girl who makes you feel like that.” You hadn’t meant for that to come out as sneakily as it did.

He chuckled, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well...you’re literally the most adored boy on campus. And Jennie really wants to date you. So it’s not like you don’t have options,” you said truthfully.

“Yea, but none of that matters,” he said, sighing.

You gave him a quizzical look.

He continued, “If I’m going to date a girl, I want to be friends with her first. I want to fall for her. And then I want to date her. I don’t want to be unsure of my feelings for her.”

Friends first? We’re friends. Could this...no. Taehyung and I have been friends for so long. If he had caught feelings, he would’ve said so by now.

You kicked your legs in the water, sad because it just seemed this talk with Taehyung just showed you to your face that he didn’t like you.

You spoke softly, “That’s a good idea. No point in wasting anyone’s time.”

“Exactly.” He stretched his arms out, “Aren’t you going to get in the water?”

You shook your head no

“C’mon, get in. It feels so good.”

You continued to shake your head, “I didn’t bring swim clothes.”

“I’m not in wwim clothes,” he said, looking down at himself.

“If you think that I’m going to go in the hot tub in my underwear, you’re fucking insane,” you said cackling. There was actually no fucking way in hell you would ever do that even if it was your own hot tub, much less with Kim Taehyung right in front of you.

“Okay, just come in with your clothes on.”

“Tae I literally didn’t bring clothes for this. These are the only pajamas I have.”

He pulled your arm and your legs slipped into the water, your pants getting soaked.

“Taehyung!” You exclaimed, shocked at what he just did.

“I have clothes here, you can wear mine. Now please, relax for a goddamn second” he said, laughing.

You narrowed your eyes at him and flipped him off, “I can’t believe you did that.”

He was still laughing and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

You eased your back against the wall of the hot tub, your shoulder touching Taehyung. You didn’t know if your body was heating up because of the water or because of how close Taehyung was.

He perked up, his eyes dancing with excitement, “Guess what?”

“What?” You couldn’t help but feel endeared at his cuteness.

“I finished the second season of Avatar!”

“For real? Oh my god. Wasn’t the ending insane?”

“Bro it was fucking insane. I can’t believe Zuko sided with Azula. And I can’t believe she shot lightning at Aang! That was crazy,” He ranted ecstatically.

You and Taehyung had given each other anime recommendations since you both were looking for new ones to watch.

He rambled on, “I don’t get why you’re in love with Zuko. Like he literally betrayed his uncle, the one dude who was on his side. Maybe for a minute when they were in Ba Sing Se when he was a cute tea shop boy, I understood, but now?”

“Patience Taehyung. You’ll understand soon enough. He’s just lost and confused okay? He just needs someone on his team.”

“Ugh whatever I guess. I’m still not convinced.”

You shook your head, he would understand once he finished the show.

Then you remembered his recommendation, “I’m almost done with the first season of My Hero Academia.”

“Bet. Isn’t it good? Who’s your favorite character?”

“It is good. I like seeing Class 1A interact with each other. They are all so angsty teens, it’s so funny. Umm it would be a tie between Todoroki and Bakugou.”

He looked shocked, “Bakugou? You like him?”

“Yes okay! I believe in him. He just is confused. I'm rooting for him. I think he’s a sweet boy.”

Taehyung shook his head disappointed, “Do you just like all the broken boy characters?”

You opened your mouth to retort something back but couldn’t come up with anything. He was right, you really did love the broken boy arc. It was just the fact that you desperately wanted to help them and show them the love they deserved. Your eyes caught Taehyung and you couldn’t help but feel the same way. You wanted to be the girl that gave him those feelings of real love, to be a real girlfriend to him.

You and Taehyung continued to talk for a while until you realized you two were probably in the hot tub for way too long.

Wrapped in your towels, you and Taehyung trudged upstairs, shivering from the cold.

Taehyung dropped you off to your room and mentioned that he would be back with clothes. You sat on your bed, buzzing with a warm feeling. Even though the voice at the back of your head was doubting every moment, telling you that Taehyung doesn’t like you like that, you couldn’t help but hold a feeling of hopefulness. He was here, with you right? Didn’t that count for something?

He came back, dressed in shorts and a black t-shirt, clutching clothes for you.

You took it from his hand and went to the bathroom to change. You smiled when you saw he brought your favorite sweater of his, the soft gray one, for you to wear. His pants were obviously way too large but you managed to fold up the pant legs so you weren’t drowning in his clothing.

Taehyung was laying on your bed, stretched out scrolling through his phone. He sat up when he heard the bathroom door open and grinned, “You look so cute wearing my clothes.”

“Shut up,” you said trying to hide your smile.

You walked around the room and noticed the glass double doors between the beds opened. You pushed open the doors and the coldness of the night sent shivers up your spine. You walked over to the edge and rested your elbows on the railing.

The back of your mind was still spinning with Hana’s voice, “Just tell him how you feel!” But you couldn’t do that. There was just too much you were risking: your friendship with Taehyung, your heart.

You tried to calm your waves of nausea and anxiety by taking deep breaths. Was this even worth it? You looked up at the night sky and saw the moon above your head. You sighed, your gaze fixating on a dim star by the bright moon. It actually was quite a beautiful night. It was quiet, a comfortable temperature warm with a light breeze, and the stars amplified the moon's beauty.

You heard Taehyung's voice behind you, “Damn jungkook really gave us the best room.”

You turned your head and saw Taehyung's boxy smile leaning against the railing right next to you. Your heart skipped a beat when you saw him. You immediately turned your head back to the star.

“Maybe he felt bad for making Hana ditch me,” you smirked.

He gave you a teasing smile, “C’mon ________ you didn’t want another night with the most handsome guy on campus?”

“And you wonder why I don’t shower you in compliments like everyone else on this fucking planet,” you said shaking your head.

“It’s ok. I don’t need the verbal confirmation from you. I know what you think of me.”

You glanced over at him, “And what’s that?”

“Even though you find me annoying, you also undeniably find me endearing. And you also think I’m hot.”

Your jaw dropped in shock at his words, “You’re so fucking full of it.”

He leaned in and brushed away the strand of hair covering your eyes, “Deny all you want but I know it. I can see it in your eyes.”

“My eyes?” you said, scoffing at his ridiculousness.

“Yep, your eyes give away everything.”

“Oh really? What else do they give away?” You said playing along with his game.

“They give away that you definitely don’t know how beautiful you look right now.”

You rolled your eyes. He exclaimed, “See! Right there. You don’t know that. I got that fr-“

You interrupted, chuckling lightly, “From my eyes, right? You’re so full of shit. I bet you use that line on all of the other girls.”

“What other girls?” he said innocently.

Taehyung was definitely something, creating his own understanding of you, pinpointing things you didn’t even notice about yourself. He looked at you, his big puppy dog eyes glittering in the moonlight, his fluffy curly hair ruffled by the soft breeze of the night. Everything about him made your heart ache with want.

He cleared his throat, grabbing your attention, “_________ why did you climb out the window? You weren’t getting claustrophobic in a bedroom.”

Oh, so he didn’t believe your answer. You tried to answer as calmly as possible, trying to not let your nerves show, “Um..I just didn’t wanna play the game anymore.”

“What did you mean by when you said ‘I don’t want it to happen like this?’ ”

Oh fuck he didn’t forget you said that. You dropped your head, desperately not wanting to make eye contact with him, “Huh? I don’t remember saying that.”

“Well, when I asked why you didn’t want to kiss me you said that.”

“I think you misheard. I said ‘nope not this’ ”

He said in complete disbelief, “I misheard? With you standing right in front of me?”

“Yep. It’s okay. You should go see a doctor about it though.” You quickly tried to divert his attention, “The stars are really beautiful tonight.”

Luckily, he seemed to understand that you were obviously not answering his questions.

“Guess which star is my favorite?” his head tilting in the direction of the night sky.

You laughed, “I don’t know. There’s so many out there.”

“Just guess. I have one that’s my favorite.”

“I don’t know. I guess that one” you said pointing to the brightest star in the sky. It was quite far from the moon.

“Nope. Try again”

“Taehyung, I’m never going to guess it. I give up, just tell me.”

“That one.” He said pointing in an area near the moon.

You tried pointing it out with your own finger, “That one?”

He leaned over and placed his hand over yours and guided it in the right direction. He looked at the star for a second and then looked at you “That one.”

You were fixated on the star and when he pulled your hand in the right direction, you realized he was talking about the star you had been staring at the whole night. You turned your head to exclaim to him the coincidence and you found his head only inches away from yours.

The words got stuck in your throat. His jet black eyes were staring into your soul.

“That star is my favorite because it’s the most beautiful. It might not be the flashiest star out there and it’s trying to be hidden in the brightness of the moonlight but I see it. And I think it’s the most beautiful star in the entire night sky. “

You realized you had been staring into his eyes for too long. He took both your hands that you hadn’t realized were trembling and enveloped them in his.

You were panicking. Your heart was beating insanely fast . Your palms felt sweaty. You tried to back away from Taehyung, pulling your hands away. You took a couple small steps back.

He doesn’t like me. He doesn’t want me. Why would he ever kiss me? I’m not even half as pretty as Jennie. You needed to get yourself out of this situation before you get your hopes up and it fucked you over completely.

Your thoughts were interrupted by your arm being tugged back in his direction. You spun into Taehyung's arms and he caught you in his embrace.

His hands were placed firmly on your waist and your arms were wrapped around his neck. You never realized how tall he was. You were on your tippy toes and you still had to crane your neck slightly to clearly see his face. Tilting downwards, his face was centimeters from yours. His eyes were sparkling with a mischievous glint and he was smiling.

It felt like your whole heart was going to explode.

What the fuck? Why did he do that? Is he not completely revolted by me?

You were attempting to speak the thoughts running through your mind but your brain had completely stopped functioning the second you got a whiff of his cologne. Your mouth was just slightly open trying to breathe because you truly were so confused as to what was happening.

“Can I kiss you?” he whispered.

The only thing you could manage was a small, shy nod.

Then his soft lips molded against yours. You closed your eyes as you felt your brain short circuit. The way his lips pressed against yours for the first time didn’t feel like electricity struck you. Instead, it felt comforting. It felt like home: his embrace, his lips, his hands on you. Like this was always meant to be. He tasted like strawberry chapstick and spearmint His right hand crept up to the side of your face

and cupped your cheek. Your breath hitched. Taehyung tilted his head at an angle to open your mouth further.

You took this opportunity to push away for a second and breathe. “Taehyung,” you breathed out.

“Shut the fuck up,” he pulled you back into a needy kiss. His plushy lips sucked on your bottom lip and you moaned for a second. Your cheeks reddened at the sound you made.

“That was so fucking hot,” he said in a shaky whisper. Your hands shift from his neck into his curls, balancing on your toes. You tugged on his curls, pulling his head closer to yours, something you’ve daydreamed about. He cupped your face and brought you even closer to him. the kisses became deeper, more fervent. As if he couldn’t get enough of you.

Your mouth opened in response. He took this opportunity to slide his tongue into your mouth. His tongue gilded against yours. It was better than you ever imagined, better than you hoped, the feel of him; it was making you lose your fucking mind.

One of Taehyung's hands remained at your waist and the other moved to the small of your back, pushing the front of your chest onto his.

It seemed like time had stopped. Once you realized you were completely breathless, you pulled away. You were breathing very hard, your heart hammering, and your mind completely numb. He placed two more soft, sweet kisses on your lips. His pupils were completely blown out and his hair was a fluffy mess.

He breathed out, shakily “This is what you meant right?”

Before you could say anything, you heard a knock on the glass door.

“Hey, Taehyung, we need you downstairs.” Jungkook’s head poked out the door.

Tae’s eyes looked apologetic when he looked at you.

“I’ll be there in a sec,” he called to Jungkook

You were still kinda breathless. His hands were pressing into your hips as if he didn’t want to let go.

He leaned in and kissed your cheek softly. He whispered in your ear, and you felt a shiver trace down your spine, “I’ll see you soon.”

You nodded and he nuzzled your neck for a second, his lips barely grazing the mole on your neck.

He slowly let go of your hips, his hands skimming your elbows and then your hands.

You watched him leave as your legs wobbled beneath you. You stood there, in complete shock as to what happened. Your whole body was buzzing, your arms covered in goosebumps, chills from what just happened.

A cold burst of wind finally snapped you out of whatever trance Taehyung put you in. You softly closed the glass doors behind you as you re-entered your room. You laid down in your bed with a stupid grin that you couldn’t get rid of. You curled up into a ball and relaxed against the pillows. For the first time in a long time, you fell asleep with no thoughts of insecurity or worry plaguing your mind.

You slowly opened your eyes and felt a familiar weight on you. You carefully looked behind you and saw once again Taehyung completely enveloping you in his embrace. His body heat felt so inviting and comfortable. Your face heated up when you saw he was indeed true to his word and was in fact sleeping shirtless with you. You grabbed your phone and saw a text from Hana.

Hana: leave by 10:30?

You: yep

It was almost 10:30 so you shifted in the bed to get up. Almost immediately, Taehyung pulled you back and whined sleepily, “Where are you going? Sleep with me.”

You giggled at his cuteness, “I have to go. Hana is waiting for me. And I have to get shit done today.”

He nuzzled himself in the crook of your neck, “Okayy. My smarty pants girl has to study.”

My girl? Does that mean...? No, he used to say stuff like that before. God, you and Taehyung really did need to talk about whatever this was. But for once in your life, you didn’t feel insecure. He must like you somewhat, right? He kissed you. That has to have meant something. You slid your hands against his broad chest, tracing his well defined muscles, “Yea, I do. But you can text me once you get back to campus. You should sleep in for now.”

He nodded and lifted his head from your shoulder. He leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on your cheek. You couldn’t hide the smile that was blooming on your face from him.

You packed up your stuff, got ready, headed downstairs after saying bye to Taehyung.

You texted Hana to let her know that you were ready to go. You sat on the empty couch in the living room, patiently waiting for her to join you. You were scrolling through Instagram when you heard a petite “ahem” in front of you. You looked up and saw an overly cheerful Jennie in front of you.

“Hi _________!” She said planting herself in the seat next to you.

“Hey Jennie,” Why the fuck is she talking to me?

“So, Taehyung was with you last night?”

“Uh ya,”

“So how was it?”

You wrinkled your eyes in confusion, not understanding her question, “How was what?”

She squealed, “The sex silly! How was it? It was your first time right? That’s such a big deal. Can’t believe you let taehyung be your first! You know he doesn’t get feelings for the girls he fucks right?”

You opened your mouth to say something but she kept going, not stopping once to take a breath, “Oh my god, wasn’t it so good though? I mean actually it might not have been that good since it was your first time but Taehyung is so caring, especially when it comes to sex. And oh my god, isn’t his dick so big? I know I shouldn’t really talk about that but since you guys hooked up I can talk to you about it. But his dick is so huge like you don’t even know since you haven’t been with other people. I’m honestly so surprised you guys fucked though. Like Taehyung usually likes girls with experience. And I guess girls who are...more into the party scene. Like it’s totally cool that you are into school but you're just like not really his type. But it’s okay because you guys fucked so his type might have changed, but I seriously doubt it. Anyways, I’m rambling. So tell me how it was!”`

You blinked a couple times to fully process every word she said. Every single feeling of insecurity that you thought had disappeared came rushing back into your mind.

What the fuck. What the fuck was I thinking. I never even told him I liked him. And he never told me. Taehyung is a fuckboi; he doesn’t catch feelings. He could have just kissed me because he was bored or some shit. Why would he trade a relationship with an average looking girl like me for fucking hot girls every weekend. I’m so stupid, what was I thinking!

You took a deep breathe and gave her a smile, “We didn’t fuck. We aren’t together. “

“Oh. Well. Then like girl to girl, I just wanted to let you know that Taehyung and I will probably be together officially very soon.”

You raised your eyebrows at this comment, trying to stifle a laugh, “Does he know this?”

Jennie looked offended but before she could ramble on again Hana texted you that she was outside. You immediately got up and headed to her car.

She squealed, “Soo what happened last night?”

You tried to act nonchalant, “uh, nothing much. We kissed.”

She almost crashed the car when you said that.

Hana berated you with questions and you gave her the sparknotes of what happened, including Jennie’s weird little monologue in the living room. Hana was almost in tears when you recapped the embarrassing moment of you crawling out a window so you didn’t have to kiss Taehyung. She apologized for her stupidity in suggesting that dare but she insisted you needed the push.

You told Hana how you were feeling, especially how unsure and insecure you felt about the situation with Taehyung. She agreed that it was definitely unclear because neither one of you actually said the words “I like you” to each other.

You and Hana came up with the plan thay the next time you were to hang out with Taehyung alone, you were going to confess.

You only piped up the courage to do so because Hana made the convincing argument that Taehyung must like you back.

However, once you returned to campus, the entire week, you were absorbed with finals and studying. Because of this, you and Taehyung were unable to find time to peacefully spend with each other. Also, your finals were finished a day earlier than Taehyung’s, so you went home early.

This proved to be working against you as with all the free time at home was only more time for you to worry and overthink about Taehyung. Then, once again you were back to avoiding Taehyung and his messages because you were too scared to actually tell him how you felt.

Tae: hey. just got home last night. wanna hang out?

Tae: ???

Tae: ur so annoying u don’t even have school what could u be doing

Tae: im literally going to come over i live in ur neighborhood in case u forgot

You didn’t think he would actually follow through but Taehyung did indeed ring your doorbell that evening. You pressed your ear against your bedroom door to hear the conversation between Taehyung and your mom.

You heard his deep voice, “Hello Mrs._________. How are you doing?”

You rolled your eyes at your mother's overly cheery voice, “I’m doing good, Taehyung. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you. You’ve grown up so much!”

“Yes it has been awhile. I’m glad that _________ and I are good friends again. Speaking of __________, is she home? I tried texting her but she didn’t respond. Is she alright?”

“Oh, you’re so sweet! She is feeling a bit under the weather. She’s barely left her room since she’s come home. I’ll let her know that you stopped by.”

“That would be great. It was nice seeing you again Mrs. _________.”

“You too Taehyung. You should come over more often! I know _________ missed you a lot.”

Ugh god, your mom was embarrassing you.

“Of course I’ll try to stop by once _________ gets back to me. Bye!”

You heard the door close and you groaned. You had to face Taehyung soon.

Your mom ended up coming to your room and went on and on about how Taehyung was such a nice boy. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes. That’s what he needs, more praise.

You laid on your bed, trying to fall asleep but of course it didn’t come easily. As you were trying to focus on the white noise, you realized you kept on getting distracted by a loud pitter patter sound. You got up and heard the sound coming from your window. You walked over and peered out your window.

“You have got to be fucking with me right now” you said, rubbing your temples.

There was Taehyung, standing outside, throwing pebbles at your window.

You opened your window, the cool air immediately giving you goosebumps.

You yelled in a hushed tone, “What are you fucking doing?”

His body smile immediately lit up, “Hey strawberry girl.”

“Taehyung, are you stupid? What are you doing here?”

“Uh, I’m here to see why the fuck you’re ignoring me.”

“I’m uh sick,” you gave two fake coughs, hoping he would be convinced. He was not.

“Cmon _________ I know when you’re lying.”

You heard some clatter coming from downstairs. Fuck. Your parents would be pissed if they saw taehyung outside your window. They obviously thought he was a good guy but your parents had a strict no guys rule. Taehyung was the only exception since you two grew up together but even he wasn’t allowed to come up to your room.

“Taehyung, I have to go. My parents will see you and we will both get in trouble. We can talk later.” You were about to shut the window but he called your name again.

“__________! That’s such bullshit. You keep avoiding me. Can’t we talk now?”

“Tae, I can’t keep shouting from my window. I’ll call you. Just go home.”

He stood firmly planted out your window, “Nope. You won’t do that. I’ll stand here all night throwing pebbles at your window. I don’t care if I get in trouble with your parents.”

Fuck. fuck. What should I do? Then you remembered. You went to your closet and found it stored on the highest shelf. Taehyung had actually bought you a rope ladder a long time ago for this very reason of sneaking you out. But you never ended up using it because you were always afraid of getting caught. You threw down the ladder and climbed out of your window quietly.

Once you landed on the ground, you walked over to Taehyung, arms crossed, pissed that he made you do this. Before you could start yelling at him for being so fucking annoying, he pulled you into a giant hug.

“Missed you. Don’t ever ignore me again,” he whispered into your ear.

And with that hug, you realized how much you missed Taehyung. His warmth, his embrace, his cute smile, his fluffy hair.

You mumbled, “Missed you too,” softly, hoping he would hear.

You pushed away from him and tried to hide your smile, “My parents are literally going to kill me. I hope you know that.”

“__________ you’re in college. You’re legally an adult. You don’t need to be afraid of getting in trouble with your parents.” Taehyung said, chuckling. He shoved his hands in his hoodie and pulled up his hood, shivering in the cold.

“Okay but you know my parents. They don’t give a shit.”

“Actually, that is very much true. I don’t think they like me very much.” He tugged your arm, leading you down a familiar dirt path.

“Nah, they like you. For some reason they think you’re like a good kid.”

His mouth opened in shock, “What do you mean for some reason? I’m a great influence on you.”

“Oh really? Like sneaking me out or taking me to frat parties or..” you were trying to think of more dumb shit Taehyung had fully encouraged you to do.

“Or sleeping with you?” He said with a wink.

“Shut up. But for real. They can never know. They would bury us both alive.”

“Man, we’ve known each other since forever and they still don’t trust me around you.”

“Don’t take it personally. You’re a guy. They are just strict about boys in general.” You began to recognize whereTaehyung was leading you to.

“Is that another reason why you haven’t dated anyone?”

“Yea I guess. My parents think dating is a distraction. Unless it’s for the intent of marriage then what’s the point. Which I understand. “

Taehyung gripped your hand as he led you down a rocky path, “That sounds lonely.”

“It is. But like I said, it’s not really something I chose. It just kinda happened to me and it’s whatever.”

“I guess I understand in my own way. Dating does take up a lot of time. And I guess I’m afraid it’ll end the same.”

“Same as what?”

“Same as Yeji. We broke up and I was so upset over it. It hurt a lot because we realized we had no future together. It was just sad that we made all those memories together and now we barely speak.”

“Fuck, that sucks.”

He nodded, fully agreeing.

Suddenly the path opened up to a clearing, a grassy field with a large tree planted by a shimmering lake.

He still held onto your hand as you made your way to the tree. You sat down, leaning your back against the tree and Taehyung laid his head on your lap. You started to ruffle his curly hair, playing with the strands.

“Remember how we used to come here?” Taehyung said, softly smiling.

You nodded, recalling how you and taehyung would come here on the weekends, having picnics, reading stories, playing cards. This tree by the lake was filled with precious memories for you and Taehyung. You kept coming even when Taehyung and you weren’t friends.

“Why were you ignoring me _________?” He asked looking up at you with his big brown eyes filled with worry.

“We were both so busy with finals I just wanted us to focus on our studies,” You said, only being partially honest.

“Sure, it’s not cause of anything else right?”

“What else could it be?”

“Maybe the fact that I kissed you and we haven’t spoken about it all.”

You closed your eyes, regretting opening your mouth. Fuck, you really didn’t want to talk about your feelings. You felt the familiar anxious feeling creep up into your heart. You took a deep breath and tried to remember Hana’s words, “___________, this boy likes you. A lot. He kissed you. He spends time with you. He texts you.. He cares about you. He treats you like a girlfriend and he wants to do boyfriend things with you. He likes you, there is no doubt about it.”

You snapped back to reality, “Yeah that has to do with it.”

“Okay so let’s talk,” He said sitting upright, leaning again against the tree, his shoulder brushing yours.

“Um. Why don’t you go first?” You said as you felt your heart race in your chest. You were going to do it. You were going to finally tell him how you felt.

He gave you a cute little smile, “Well it was a really nice kiss. How did you like it? It was your first kiss.”

“Um uh yea it was really nice. Really sweet,” You babbled out.

“Okay cool. Well then that’s that. We don’t need to be awkward around each other right?”

You nodded. It was now or never. He seemed to have such a chill response to the kiss. He didn’t freak out so he must have enjoyed it. So that means he likes me, right?

Your voice got quiet, “Taehyung.”

His eyes met yours. You whispered out, heart pounding, “I need to tell you something.”

“What is it?” He asked, earnestly.

“I um...” you were racking your brain trying to find the right words to say. You were fiddling with your hands, hoping it would calm you down.

Taehyung looked at you, wide eyed, and took your hands into his.

He leaned in close, his breath tickling your ears, “Hey. You can tell me anything. I'm listening.”

Your brain shut off the second He held your hands. “It's you. It’s fucking you. I like you. I like you a whole fucking lot Kim Taehyung. I think I might love you at this point. And I just really needed to tell you.”

It went dead silent. All you could hear was Taehyung's soft breathing, the rustle of the wind, and the quiet ripples from the lake.

Then he smiled and let out a light laugh.

Your heart immediately lifted. He’s smiling. That’s a good sign. He’s going to tell you that he likes you too and then you could be a couple. You were freaking out over nothing.

“Are you being for real?” He said shakily.

You narrowed your eyes brows, confused at his response.

He laughed nervously. Your confidence was going down rapidly.

“__________ you aren’t being serious right?”

“What do you mean? Of course I’m being serious. I meant what I said.”

“Cmon ________ why would you do this to me?”

Your heart dropped. Oh my god. It was slowly becoming clear to you. He doesn’t like me. He’s mad that I told him how I felt. This was literally your biggest fear. He doesn’t want you. He never did.

You couldn’t look at Taehyung anymore. You tore your gaze away from him, “What are you saying? You don’t have feelings for me?”

“__________ I don’t know. I honestly don’t know. But you literally do know that I’m not interested in dating anyone. I’ve told you this.”

Your voice was faltering as you tried to maintain a calm demeanor, “But...you said that...you were thinking about it.”

“Yea I was thinking about it. That doesn’t mean I want to involve myself with someone right away. I’m honestly not ready for a relationship again.” He sighed, clearly frustrated, running his hand through his curly hair. You were frozen, you felt hot tears well up in your eyes but you were determined to not let him see you cry.

He continued, sounding somewhat angry, “I just told you how much my break up with Yeji hurt me.”

You closed your eyes, letting yourself absorb all of his hurt words. It was too late now. You couldn’t take it back. You let it all out, all your thoughts and feelings and it turned out to be exactly how you feared. You were an idiot. You let your guard down again and you let him in again. And he broke your heart. Again.

You voiced another nagging thought, “But you kissed me...”

His words were sharp and cold, “It was just a kiss __________. It’s not that deep or that big of a deal.”

This is exactly what you were afraid of. Losing these meaningful moments with someone who not only doesn’t care about you but also someone who finds them unimportant. The kiss meant everything to you and absolutely nothing to him.

Taehyung's voice softened, “I’m sorry ________ but I don’t know how I feel okay? I’m confused. I do like you but I’m just not sure if it’s the way you want me to.”

You felt his hand cup your cheek and he tiled your face towards him, finally making eye contact. He saw your teary, red eyes that you tried so hard to hide. “I’m sorry,” he whispered out. The way your heart was thudding against your chest made you realize no matter what he did, no matter how he hurt you, no matter how many times he would take your heart and crush it into tiny bits, you would still love him. God you were so fucked.

You whispered back hoarsely, staring deep into his dark eyes, feeling brave enough to speak your mind to him one more time, “Don’t be. I just...always had this hope in my head, I guess. Maybe that with time...you could love me the way I wanted you to. But if we were meant to be, we would have been by now. Someone like me doesn’t end up with someone like you.”

You couldn’t take it anymore. You got up abruptly and left. You heard him distantly calling your name but you couldn’t turn back. Every muscle in your body wanted you to turn around and just say “forget it” to Taehyung and have things return back to normal. But for once, you listened to your head, it was over, you told him how you felt and he didn’t give a shit.

You walked home, alone, feeling comforted by the coldness of the night. You climbed back in your room and threw the ladder deep into your closet, knowing you would never need it again. You laid in your bed, processing what just happened. You believed in something that wasn’t even real. You glanced at your tear stained face in the standing mirror across from your bed. You couldn’t help but wonder what it was about you that wasn’t enough for him. The truth was you couldn’t be mad at Taehyung. You didn’t even love yourself. And that’s how you understood why Taehyung didn’t either. You closed your eyes, finally letting the exhaustion set in and breathing slowly, as if all of the pressure of stress and anxiety were dissipating from your body.

The reality settled in your brain and your heart: being lonely fits you.

author’s note: part 5 will definitely be the last part. i was writing this and i realized it was getting very lengthy and there are some plot parts im still working out lol. anyways i was very inspired by some tv shows and movies i rewatched recently for this part (new girl, princess diaries 2, & ofc to all the boys). lmk what you think and if you would like to be added to the taglist!

tags: @fleurmoon @tangledsparkles @chocolatebelievercrusade @brokenobserver @ncitydreamies @soulstaes @bonnyskies @thelilbutifulthings @busansgloss @imluckybitches @xlectrahearts @embrace-themagic @bts-dreamybaby @belshka @trinbin039 @xxlostinseoul @sheislikearock @madjammil @guksflavor @yn-the-reader @kingjvngins @ggukkieland @waves-and-woods @aa-ronpa

#strawberry girl #bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bangtan sonyeondan #kim taehyung #taehyung #taehyung hot #bts x reader #taehyung x reader #taehyung fluff #taehyung angst #bts scenarios #taehyung scenarios #bts imagines #taehyung fanfic #taehyung x y/n #taehyung fanfiction

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xbaepsae · 4 years

Text

prove it (m)

“How could he not see how this was all affecting you? Why didn’t he realize you needed him to be present in your life? But as much as you needed him to be one hundred percent here for you, a part of you would just rather have him one hundred percent gone.”

[boyfriend!jeongguk x girlfriend!reader]

genre: estranged relationship!au, smut, some angst

word count: 4.9k

rating: mature

warnings: mutual masturbation, jealousy, language

a/n: this is another reupload! i went back and reread this and, honestly, it’s not too shabby. granted, it’s not that complex, but i enjoyed writing this estranged relationship between jk and the reader. kind of want to write a follow up. let me know lol. xoxo

Long distance relationships suck.

Even for the strongest of people, separation is never easy. Ideally, everyone wants to believe that not being with the person they love all the time isn’t a big deal. However, after a while, there are different factors that cause major stress in a relationship.

There’s a lack of communication sometimes; you can’t physically see them often, so you resort to the basic text and phone call. Still, it’s not the same. Seeing someone through a phone is vastly different than physically being with them. There’s a lack of intimacy too; no holding hands, late night cuddles. Your toys and hands can only do so much, unfortunately.

Being long distance wasn’t always the case for you and Jeongguk, but it became a reality when you both decided to attend different universities.

Early in your relationship, you both avoided talks about the future. In the back of your mind, you already knew that you both had different plans for college. But you didn’t want to admit it out loud—not even to him.

A part of you was afraid about the longevity of your relationship. Most long-distance relationships, and even more so with high school relationships, don’t really make it. But you loved Jeongguk; you don’t think you’ll ever be able to love anyone else as much. As cheesy as it may sound, he’s your other half. You knew that there were others out there, but you didn’t want anyone else.

“You’ll call me every day, yeah?” you asked him the day you both graduated.

“Of course,” he caressed your arm. “Every day.”

The first semester at college, you both talked nearly every day. And you were happy; so happy that despite the distance, not much had changed. Even with your different schedules, you both still made time for each other. You both even visited each other—you went to see him during Halloween, and he surprised you before your finals.

But of course, life gets in the way.

After the first winter break, the communication between you two dwindled. And after that first summer, everything changed. Even when you both did happen to be home, you barely had the time to talk let alone hang out. You found out more about Jeongguk’s life from his Instagram account than you did directly from him. Every time you scrolled onto his page, countless pictures of him partying and hanging out with his friends filled your screen—and yet, no time to give you a quick phone call. It was frustrating.

You considered calling it quits multiple times—what is the use of being with someone if you both don’t act like a couple? It was so bad; you couldn’t even remember the last time you two were in the same room. But every time you brought up the issue, Jeongguk did some redeemable act and you forgave him instantly.

It seemed to be a never-ending cycle.

And now, even though you both were well into your third year in college, Jeongguk was still tethering you on a string. How could he not see how this was all affecting you? Why didn’t he realize you needed him to be present in your life? But as much as you needed him to be one hundred percent here for you, a part of you would just rather have him one hundred percent gone.

***

3:14 PM | Jeongguk: I’ll call you later

3:15 PM | You: for real?

You watched the text bubble pop up for a few seconds before disappearing. And when it disappears, it doesn’t pop up again. A sigh leaves your mouth as you drop your phone onto the table.

“Are you texting him?”

Looking up, you make eye contact with your friend Taehyung. “Yeah…”

“And?” Taehyung prompts you to finish your sentence.

“And…he said he’ll call me later,” you say, “but these types of texts from Jeongguk are pointless and disappointing.”

You met Taehyung your first year at college, and immediately hit it off. You helped him with his math homework, and he paid you back by listening to all of your Jeongguk drama. Sometimes you wished you could fall for Taehyung—a relationship with him was bound to be easier than the one you had right now—but he was already in a deeply committed relationship with the cute librarian assistant, Jimin.

“I mean, at least he texted you, right?” your friend attempts to make you feel better, but you feel anything but that.

“I guess.”

“Well don’t be too hard on yourself, buttercup,” Taehyung smiles, “because today is not the day to be down in the dumps!”

Half the time, you have no idea what the words that came out of his mouth even mean. “What are you talking about?”

“Don’t you remember?” You have no idea. “It’s Hoseok’s birthday tonight!”

After a few moments, the gears in your head begin moving and you remember Taehyung mentioning something about it last week. You aren’t really close with Hoseok though; he’s Taehyung’s friend and a member of the soccer team, so it slipped your mind.

You have only chatted with Hoseok twice; once was at a party freshman year and you were wasted, and the second was in line for coffee at Starbucks; but you were pretty sure he had no idea who you were. “But I don’t really even know him.”

“Y/n, he doesn’t care who comes; hell, I think he invited the entire school. Besides, I already told him that you’re my plus one since Jimin can’t make it.”

Even though it was a Friday, you were not in the mood to do anything. All you wanted was to return back to your apartment and sleep until Monday rolled around. “Tae…”

“It’ll take your mind off of Jeongguk,” he says in a sing-song voice.

And he’s right—it will be a distraction from your issues in the love department. You think about it for a moment before deciding to hell with it; you’re going to allow yourself to enjoy tonight. “Okay fine, I’ll go.”

Taehyung gets up in that moment and engulfs you in a hug, which attracts the stares of many people in the room. “Thanks y/n!”

“I think you can let me go now,” you pat his back and he lets you go with an airy oh.

“Okay, well, I’ll swing by your place at around seven and then we’ll goooooo!”

You laugh at his enthusiasm and bid your friend goodbye as you both leave. You’re pretty sure Taehyung has a class, but he’s going the opposite direction…so you’re not sure what he’s doing. But you don’t think too much about it and make it back to your apartment. There, you greet your roommate, Nana.

“Hey, girl hey,” she smiles, and you’re struck once again by how pretty she is.

You and Nana have been roommates since you both started going to school here. Most people don’t end up living with their first roommate their entire stay at college, but you both got along well and there has never been a problem. Also, you two just knew too much about each other’s living habits at this point to live with other people.

“Hi,” you smile back, setting your things down before falling down onto the couch beside her.

“So, how was your day?”

Since you both are juniors and have busy schedules, it seems like you never really get to see each other. Which sucks because you honestly consider Nana to be your best friend, besides Taehyung of course.

“It’s been okay,” you begin, “I barely passed my exam in history and managed to turn in my paper for lit right before the deadline…and Jeongguk texted me.”

“Jeongguk texted you?” she only seems to pick up the last bit you said.

“Yep,” you pop the end of the word.

“How’d that go?”

You give her a look, “Horrible.”

Nana gives you a sympathetic smile, “Sorry boo that you have such a shitty boyfriend.”

“He’s not shitty…he’s just…” you try to get the words out about how loving Jeongguk really is, but your mind fails you. Maybe she’s right. “Okay, maybe he is being a little shit right now.”

“You know, I really liked Jeongguk when I first met him,” your roommate says. “But then he just stopped coming to see you.”

You sigh and burry your head into a pillow, “I know.”

“What did he even text you about?”

“He said that he’ll call or whatever—but I’m not even sure if he’s serious, or just messing with me,” you lift your head up. “Do you know that we haven’t talked since school started again?”

Nana gasps, “That was almost two months ago.”

“Exactly.”

“Y/n!” she screams your name. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“I’m actually going crazy, Nana,” you feel defeated; what kind of relationship is this? “But maybe tonight will get this shit off my mind.”

“What are you doing tonight?” she asks.

You explain how Taehyung has basically dragged you to Hoseok’s birthday party and even though you don’t want to go that much, you need to forget about Jeongguk for one night. Nana thankfully agrees with you. She even says that you can borrow one of her dresses since you don’t, in her words, own anything nice.

“Wow are you saying I have no style?” you pretend to be hurt.

“I’m saying you don’t have clothes appropriate for nights like these,” Nana laughs and tells you to follow her to her closet.

When you walk into her room and open her closet—you let her have the bigger closet because she has more clothes than you anyway—you’re not surprised to see a variety of mini skirts and dresses. Nana definitely goes out more than you ever do and proclaims that she can never wear the same outfit twice. “What shall we put you in?”

You shrug, “I’m down to wear anything.”

But maybe you’re giving Nana too much free reign because as she begins to dig through her closet, she pulls out the most revealing dress you’ve ever seen. She tosses it you before you can blink and demands that you have to wear it.

You nearly fall over from the force of the dress, but somehow manage to catch it. Pulling it away from your body, you immediately begin to shake your head. There was no way in hell you can go out in public like this—you don’t even want to wear it in the safety of your apartment. The dress is black with a plunging back and an equally plunging front. And with its short length, it leaves nothing to the imagination. “Hell no.”

“Come on, y/n!” Nana whines, mouth dropping when you fling the dress onto the floor. “This dress will look so good on you!”

“I don’t think anyone can wear this dress,” you frown as she hands you the dress again.

Your roommate rolls her eyes, “Please—I wore this! And I got a ton of male attention that night…you will too.”

But you don’t want the attention of multiple guys, just want the attention of one. “I don’t know, Nana. I’m not one to wear this kind of stuff…”

“Just this one time! Trust me.”

And even though you’re completely out of your element, you succumb to Nana’s demands and trudge into the closet to try the dress on. You let your clothes fall onto the carpeted floor and slip the revealing dress on. Surprisingly, even though you and Nana aren’t necessarily the same size, the dress seems to fit; you just hope all your precious body parts aren’t hanging out on full display.

When you step out for your roommate to see the dress, her jaw drops, and she lets out the loudest ear piercing scream you’ve ever heard. It’s so loud, you’re positive the neighbors heard it.

“Oh my god, y/n! You look so fucking good,” she pushes you towards her full-length mirror and the air seems to leave your lungs.

“I…” you’re at a loss for words, “I…actually like it?”

Nana screams again and proceeds to hug you, but you can’t stop staring at the mirror. You hated the way the dress looked on the hanger; now, is it crazy for you to say it makes you feel like a bad bitch? It feels like you can conquer the world.

“I told you!” Nana exclaims. “God—you look so good; you can just keep the dress after this. I don’t think I could ever wear it again after you just slayed my existence.”

“Okay, you’re just being dramatic at this point.”

“But no seriously, you look amazing and fucking Jeon Jeongguk is missing out,” she says hugging you again. “Can I do your hair and makeup?”

A few hours later, the doorbell rings as you slip your shoes on. Nana runs to answer the door and you smile as Taehyung walks in. The moment his eyes land on you, he stops in his tracks and brings a hand up to his mouth. “Y/n?”

“Don’t look so shocked,” you roll your eyes.

“Who are you and what did you do with y/n?” he runs up to you, inspecting your body from head to toe. “Who knew you had this side in you?”

“You can thank me for that,” Nana slides beside you, offering a bright smile.

After a little convincing, you managed to bribe Nana in coming out tonight too. Your main argument for making her go out too is that you needed someone to last the night with. Even though you are technically Taehyung’s date, he never stays out long and you didn’t want to be left alone with Hoseok and his friends. And you promised that all the drinks were on you, which made her agree in a heartbeat.

“I’m actually blown away,” Taehyung rubs his eyes.

You feel a bit of pride flare up inside of you; if your friends were already so blown away, you can only imagine the reactions from other people.

“You guys are so nice,” you smile before Taehyung makes it known that you all have to go before the party begins.

The three of you hop into his car as he drives to the place where Hoseok’s hosting his party. It’s at a local bar just down the street from school and when you get there, you see a huge sign with the words ‘Happy Birthday Hoseok’ in bold letters. Well, that’s one way to let everyone know. As Taehyung parks, you realize just how many people are here; birthday boy must’ve really invited everyone.

Walking inside the bar, Hoseok stands front and center and immediately greets you guys.

“Taehyung!” he excitedly says, a bright smile om his face. “Glad you could make it.”

The two of them shake hands before Taehyung wishes him a happy birthday and points to you, “You know y/n and Nana, right?”

“Of course,” Hoseok turns to you and immediately takes in your appearance. You notice his eyes widen at your dress before they meet your gaze. “Glad you guys could make it.”

You redden under his heated look as he reaches a hand out and you return the favor by extending your own too. Taehyung quickly suggests that you all take a picture together before the night gets too crazy and Nana forces you beside Hoseok. You give her a wide-eyed look, but she just smiles. You offer your phone to someone nearby and they tell you four to get into position.

The phone camera flashes while you offer your biggest smile. A few more flashes go off before the phone gets passed back in your direction. You swipe through the pictures, because one is simply not sufficient, and are pleasantly pleased with yourself. You have to admit it, you look pretty good.

“Damn, y/n!” Nana brings the attention to you and everyone begins to ask to see the pictures. But before Nana can pass your phone around, Hoseok tells you that he has to attend to the rest of his guests. At that, you quickly send everyone the pictures.

“I’ll catch you later?” he asks, and you realize he’s talking to you. Heat creeps up your face as you reply with a tentative sure and watch Hoseok walk away.

The moment he’s out of sight, Taehyung and Nana turn to you simultaneously saying that he definitely likes you. And while you’re flattered by the attention, you’re not interested. So you just brush your friends off and walk deeper into the bar. You order the three of you drinks and look at the pictures again.

“I think you should post the pictures,” Nana says sipping her drink.

You raise a brow, “Why?”

“Because you look good,” she talks like it’s the most obvious thing ever.

“Isn’t it a bit scandalous?”

“No?” Taehyung’s words come out like a question. “I’m posting one of these too.”

“Yeah but it’s normal for you to post stuff like this.” You honestly aren’t one to post suggestive pictures. Your feed is rather plain and simple. Also, you don’t party much either so might just look weird, or are you thinking way too much about this?

“Maybe it will elicit a reaction from that boyfriend of yours.”

Your ears perk up at Nana’s words. “I don’t think he even checks my social media…”

She raises a brow, “Girl, all men check their girls social accounts whether they like to admit it or not. Besides, he posted up pics with his boys earlier…why can’t you?”

She has a point. As the two of you were getting ready before, you scrolled through Jeongguk’s profile and saw that he posted a picture from last night. And it was the same pictures he was always posting—him and his friends with those damn red solo cups. If Jeongguk can post pictures of him at parties, why can’t you?

And at the end of the day, they are just pictures—completely harmless. You quickly scroll through the pictures again and pick the one that you look best in. After editing the picture and adding a witty caption, you press post. As you watch the page load, your heart races. Soon, a text bubble pops up signaling that the picture has been posted and you internally scream.

“Did you do it?” Nana asks, looking over your shoulder.

All you can do is nod and shove your phone away from you. “Can we just forget I did that?”

Taehyung and Nana don’t need to be told twice before ordering a round of shots for you, which you down without a fight.

***

As the night progresses, you actually do forget that you posted the picture.

With your phone on silent and your body a little more than slightly buzzed, you let the music and atmosphere of the bar take you away. By this point, you aren’t sure what time it is or where Taehyung went. You’re betting that he already left, but you’re too absentminded to really care right now. Beside you is Nana, but she’s rather preoccupied with a guy.

You try to grab her attention, to let her know that you need to run to the bathroom, but it’s fruitless so you just leave. In the bathroom, you push open a stall and let out a cry when your phone falls and narrowly misses the toilet. Thank god. Picking up the phone, you suddenly realize how many unread messages and missed phones you actually have…and they’re all from Jeongguk. You briefly run over the messages and see that he’s been leaving message after message for you to call him.

As if the ten missed calls weren’t enough.

Quickly doing your business, you run out of the bathroom and tell Nana that you need to go back to the apartment. But instead of the both of you leaving, she tells you that she’s more than likely not coming back tonight, and you catch the look in her eyes. Before calling an Uber back, you make her promise to text you and then you’re off.

The moment you step through the threshold of your place, you call him. And surprisingly enough, he answers on the first ring.

“Y/n.” As much as you hate to admit it, you’ve missed his voice.

“Hello to you, too,” you dismiss such defeating thoughts and try to remember your anger towards him.

On the other side of the phone, he sighs, “Where are you?”

“At home,” you tell him, kicking off your heels and walking into your bedroom.

“I see…” he says. “So, you’re not out at a party? I saw the picture you posted.”

You release a deep breath. So that’s what this phone call is about.

“Did you just call to chew me out?” you fall onto your bed. “Because if that’s the case, I don’t want to hear it.”

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

“Why the fuck do even you care?” you retort. “I see you partying every week too, and do I make a big deal out of it? No. You’re such a hypocrite.”

Jeongguk is quiet for a moment. He’s so quiet you almost think he’s hung up on you, but before you can say anything else, he asks, “Are you still at the party?”

You roll your eyes, “I told you I’m at home already.”

“Prove it,” he says.

You don’t even know what he’s asking for. How are you supposed to prove you were at your apartment? “What?”

“Skype me.” Oh.

“Isn’t it a little late,” you say, peering at the clock on your wall that reads a little after midnight. “Shouldn’t you be in bed?”

Even though you’re angry at Jeongguk ninety-five percent of the time, that doesn’t mean you don’t care to know what goes on in his life. You know that he has practice every Saturday morning and if he doesn’t sleep, he’ll be a cranky little baby.

“Practice is cancelled tomorrow.” It’s like he’s read your mind or something. And after much contemplating, you tell him you’ll skype him.

Grabbing your laptop from the floor, you can’t deny the anxious excitement you feel. You also can’t deny the fact that you miss Jeongguk desperately, even though he can be an asshole. It’s honestly been so long and you want nothing more than to see his face again. Logging onto your skype account, you click on his little icon and watch as the screen begins to make a call. As it loads and connects, you situate your laptop away from you.

And the moment Jeongguk appears on your screen, you feel an array of emotions. He’s in his room, you can tell from his blue pillows and the posters that line the wall behind him. A part of you wants to cry as dumb as it sounds; it just feels like you haven’t seen him in so long. Your eyes run over the softness of his features before meeting his piercing gaze.

“Hey,” you offer a half-smile.

“Hey.”

“So,” you clear your throat, “as you can see, I am at home…in my room.”

He nods, not looking away from you, “Sorry for doubting you. That picture…just really fucked me up.”

“Why?” you question, shifting your position.

“First of all, you look fucking amazing in that dress,” Jeongguk smirks and you remember that you’re still in Nana’s revealing dress, face heating up. “Second, that guy’s hand on your body was literally too much.”

You’re not sure what he’s talking about, so you look back at the picture and notice that Hoseok’s hand was wrapped rather tightly your waist. “I didn’t even realize.”

“Sure.”

“No, I’m serious,” you look back at Jeongguk. “I barely know the guy. It was his birthday tonight and Taehyung invited me.”

“And you still let him put his hands all over you?” he asks.

Why is he getting so angry about the picture? It was just a photo. Never in all the years you two have been together has he ever been like this. Is he jealous? You haven’t thought to pin him as the jealous type, but perhaps it’s finally showing.

“Are you jealous?” you narrow your eyes as his own widen.

“Of course not,” he brushes you off. “I just don’t like it when guys put their hands all over other people’s girlfriends.”

He’s totally jealous and your heart begins to warm at his words. “I’m your girlfriend?”

You’re teasing him and he doesn’t seem to catch on. “Are you not?”

“I don’t know,” you shrug. “Doesn’t really seem like it sometimes. I mean, you never call me. Aren’t people supposed to call their girlfriends? And I just feel neglected, you know? Like you’re living a completely different life from me—like we’re not even dating.”

“I’m sorry,” he immediately says, wetting his bottom lip. “I just—I’ve gotten caught up with life lately. I mean it when I say I’m going to call, because I really want to, but it doesn’t always happen.”

You’re a bit shocked at his apologetic confession because you were not expecting it. Jeongguk is not usually the one in your relationship to cave in first; you’re usually the one who comes running to him. Maybe he does still care about you in the same way he did all those years ago.

“You’re sorry?” you ask. “Prove it.”

His eyebrows raise at your repeated phrase. “What?”

“If you’re so sorry…show me.”

Where these words are coming from, you literally have no idea. While you cave in first, Jeongguk is way more forward about his intentions. It’s like your roles have switched and you strangely love it. His eyes stare into yours with so much intensity, it almost feels like he’s right here with you and not just on your laptop screen.

You wait for him to say something—do something; the anticipation of his actions have you squirming on your bed.

“Take off the dress,” he suddenly says, voice much lower than before.

Your insides clench as you raise your body to kneel on the bed and unzip the dress, letting it fall into a pile around your knees. Jeongguk lets out a deep breath as he takes in your smooth skin, body only covered by your flimsy underwear.

“I couldn’t wear a bra with the dress,” you smile at his reaction.

“Fuck, y/n,” he swears. “Take off the underwear and sit back on the bed. I want to see you.”

You oblige and fling your last item of clothing onto the floor. You’re about to do as Jeongguk wishes and lay back, but you stop. “I want to see you, too.”

His eyes darken as he pushes his laptop forward to reveal more of himself and peels the white t-shirt off his body. Your eyes drink in the muscles that adorns his body—god, it’s been so long since you’ve seen him like this. You’ve missed this all terribly. After chucking his skirt to the side, he pushes the waistband of his sweats down and reveals his already hard cock.

“Commando?” you smile, body heating up with desire. As you say this, he begins to slowly stroke himself and you swear that nothing hotter has ever graced your eyes.

“Lay back for me baby,” he whispers, and you follow his instructions, leaning back onto your headboard so you can still see him. “Touch that pretty pussy of yours for me.”

And you begin touching yourself, hands rubbing your sensitive clit. The first touch already has you moaning Jeongguk’s name. Fuck; you wish he was here with you right now. You wish it was him whose hands were touching you instead of your own. So you imagine his hands on your body instead and your eyes nearly roll to the back of your head.

“It feels so good,” you moan, watching your boyfriend as he moves his hand up and down his hard shaft. You can see the bit of pre-cum that has already leaked out of his head and you want nothing more than to lick it off. “Jeongguk…”

“You’re so hot,” he forces through clenched teeth. “Stick a finger inside baby. I want to see you fuck yourself.”

You do—you stick one and then another, pretending Jeongguk is actually entering you instead of your fingers. You start with a steady rhythm, slowly moving in and out before going a little faster. Jeongguk begins to match his pace with you and you feel yourself getting close. Your hips begin to buck up into your hands and your palm rubs against your sweet spot.

Sweat begins to bead along your forehead and you use your other hand to rub little circles into your clit again. “I’m so close.”

Jeongguk groans at the image he’s seeing, you desperate for relief. “Cum for me baby; I need you to cum, okay?”

And you can’t help it, you cry as your orgasm hits. It sends waves of pleasure throughout your body, causing your legs to shake. The entire time you ride the high, you’re saying Jeongguk’s name and it isn’t long before his own orgasm arrives. You watch as his face contorts, brows furrowed together and mouth slightly parted, and his load shoots onto his abdomen.

His dark hair is drenched in sweat, and chest rises and falls with each heavy breath. Jeongguk brushes his hair back and grabs his discarded t-shirt to wipe himself. You sit back up on the bed after you catch your own breath and brush your hair to the side.

“Thanks for that,” you tell him, and he laughs.

“Thank you, too,” Jeongguk smiles. “I needed that.”

“Same,” your eyes bore into his and silence passes between the two of you. You know this moment doesn’t change much; there is still a lot of work that needs to be done in your relationship. However, what you do know is that Jeongguk still cares and that give you hope. “I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you more.”

#armiesnet #btsbookclub #bangtan bookclub #bts fic #jungkook fic #jeongguk fic #kpop fic #bts smut #kpop smut #bts #bangtan #jungkook #jeongguk #smut #angst #prove it #xbaepsae

148 notes · View notes

paranetics · 4 years

Note

hiya could you do a kiadam for 17. and 22.? if your not too busy. thanks !!

17. “Looks like we’ll be trapped for a while…” 22. “I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.”

He’s completely minding his own business, being friendly with his physics textbook, all pressed up against the end of the bookshelf in the library, successfully having a love affair with headache-inducing math equations, when Mira ambushes him.

“Hiya,” she says, suddenly right in his face.

“Aisghls!” he gurgles, in a completely manly way, thank you. She sits back on her heels and laughs at him, loud and mocking. He scowls at her.

Her braces are blue now, matching the streaks in her hair. She looks nice, he decides, all neon green and blue. The loudness of her wardrobe suits her -- she’d be strange to him if she ever tried to tone it down.

“Oh, man, you should’ve seen your face.”

“Fuck you,” Kai snaps, smoothing out the pages of his book. “I am busy learning how to destroy the AP Phys exam. Stop being a distraction.”

She pouts at him. “Come on, you're seriously not still mad at me about the ceramic pig.”

“I’m always going to be mad at you about the ceramic pig,” he says primly. Then he sighs, unable to resist. “What’s up?”

Her smile turns bright, and his heart does that familiar little stutter. Kai has always, always loved her. Sure, she’s Adam’s best friend and has inclinations more Reeve-based, but there’s always going to be something about her that just catches him in the right spot. He’s over it now, and he has erm, other areas of interest, but she’ll always be special.

“Nessa’s having a party--”

“Ugh,” Kai interrupts.

“--with alcohol--”

“Double ugh.”

“And cute boys will be there,” Mira wheedles, whipping out her best puppy-eyes.

“I don’t care,” Kai says, shuffling away from her and looking back at his textbook. The particles will... he reads.

“Adam will be there,” she tries. Obvious trump card. Goddammit.

He cuts his eyes toward her, calculating. She’s grinning, triumphant, confident that she’s got him. He groans internally, because it’s either that he goes to this party and enjoys at least twelve percent of it, or Mira and Adam will wake him up from a dead sleep sometime in the AM, drunk and needy.

Part of his resistance is a lie, he always likes parties. He doesn’t like Vanessa, but she’s Reeve’s friend, and by proxy, Mira’s friend. He can pretend to like her for one night, especially if he gets to hang out with people. What can he say, extroversion. It’s a disease.

It’s just, recently, there’s been this trend. It’s like he’s been cursed.

Kai pretends to think about it.

“Fine,” he grits out.

“Yay!” Mira says, standing up and doing a little celebratory wiggle. She pulls her phone out of her pocket and unlocks it. “I’ll add you to the group text. Also, I want Reeve to drive me so you’re taking Adam alone okay bye.”

“Huh,” Kai says as she speed-walks away from him. “What? Hey!”

But she’s gone, vaguely eucalyptus-scented-shampoo left in her wake. Alone? With Adam? Fuck.

His phone buzzes.

Group: party 🎉🥂🥳🎊 time

mirakat added humantorchkai to the group

abeaverdam: Oh he’s coming?

lochnessa: Damn I didn’t know he left his house anymore

mirakat: ya i cornered his ass in th library

mirakat: hes a total slut 4 skool

mirakat: kais my bitch tho lol so ya hes comin

mirakat: dam hes drivin u

abeaverdam: Is that ok kai?

humantorchkai: yeah

humantorchkai: when?

lochnessa: Friday.

Kai’s late to first period on Wednesday, which Reeve notices, and bugs him about for ten minutes straight. He rolls in twenty minutes after the bell, wearing the clothes he left on his bedroom floor, all rumpled up and disorganized, and without a note. He drops into his seat and makes it approximately two minutes before Reeve leans over, into his space, and starts the interrogation.

“Oh my God,” Kai says to the ceiling. “For the last time, my alarm didn’t go off.”

“My Spidey-senses tell me you’re a liar,” Reeve says, and seriously, what does Mira see in this complete dork? He’s so nosy.

Kai drags his gaze from the ceiling to stare at him. “I think your janky-ass ‘spider-sense’ needs a psych eval.”

Reeve crosses his arms and sniffs at him. “Rude. I thought we were friends.”

“We are--” Kai scrubs his hands through his hair violently, frustrated. He catches the smirk on Reeve’s face. “Hey! That doesn’t work on me anymore. I’ve evolved.”

The smirk doesn’t leave Reeve’s face.

The truth is, Kai’s late because he had a nightmare. Or a wet dream. Depends on your definition of either thing. It’s been reoccurring pretty consistently, and Kai always wakes up from it breathing hard, adrenaline in his veins, and a hard-on. Today just happened to be shittier, and he couldn’t get back to sleep right away, so he overslept when his alarm went off.

It’s pretty much the worst, been happening for almost a month, and Kai is slowly losing his mind. But. whatever, the important part is this: he’s with Adam, and Adam kisses him. They could be in space, or in a submarine, or whatever Kai’s subconscious feels like cooking up. They could be anything, pirates, elven rebel warriors, it doesn't matter. In every dream, Kai’s with Adam, and at some point Adam leans over, the smell of Hennessy whiskey on his breath, and kisses Kai.

It’s why Kai’s been so rigid lately, avoiding his friends and refusing to go to parties, because of what happened Last Time he’d gone.

Mad Libs! Fill in the blanks, Sherlock.

He’s so totally, totally, totally screwed. And no one is allowed to know, not even Reeve, who knows Adam’s a flirty drunk and that Kai’s pathetic, and hasn’t even told anyone any of Kai’s other secrets, because this? This is world-ending levels of FUCK.

So, when the bell rings, Kai basically sprints out the door to avoid Reeve.

Group: party 🎉🥂🥳🎊 time

speedyskeet: should i bring da weed

reever: ohhh shiiiit hell yeah

lochnessa: No LSD though

speedyskeet: :O

speedyskeet: um ok MOM

reever: wtf ness

reever: psychedelic rights!!!

speedyskeet: let me get us fkd up!!

mirakat: wait didnt we hav 2 call an ambulance 4 coop last time u brought more than weed to a party

mirakat: or was tht a different school

speedyskeet: .........

speedyskeet: ok so im assuming edibles and my bong right

Kai takes his lunch to Mr Tucker’s room.

Mr Tucker is the APUS history teacher for the senior class, and he is the only non-STEM teacher that Kai likes. Mira is also his favorite student, so he lets them eat lunch in his room. It’s better than fighting for a spot in the crowded cafeteria, and Kai likes hiding from the rest of the student body.

Adam, Reeve, and Mira are sitting at one of the table groups when Kai walks in with his plate of chicken nuggets, Vanessa and Skeet nowhere to be seen. They’re probably getting high in the parking lot.

Mr Tucker is scrolling through youtube, his computer desktop displayed on the projector screen.

“Why’d you look up Nyan cat?” Kai asks, tilting his head as he watches Mr Tucker scroll.

“It’s stuck in his head,” Mira pipes up, helpfully.

Mr Tucker grunts confirmation and apparently selects the version he likes. Reeve groans when it starts playing, slumping forward over his tuna salad. Mr Tucker picks up his normal vegetable-based salad, his bushy mustache wiggling in that way that means he’s smiling.

Kai sits next to Reeve, across from Adam. Mistake, Kai realizes too late. Big mistake. Because now they have to make eye contact, and Kai’s belly catches fire at the memory of drunkAdamhe’sKISSINGMESOMEONEHELP when he looks down at his plate of chicken nuggets. It’ll be obvious on his face in a few moments, he’s never been able to fight off a blush well, and then there’s going to be Questions. Capital-Q Questions.

But Reeve’s talking about, like, whatever drama majors talk about, and when Kai chances a peek up, Adam’s not looking at him. So.

Kai can’t help it, okay? He’s creepy. Sue him. No wait, that’s not-- ugh.

Kai studies the contours of Adam’s face while he’s not looking. His high cheekbones and his sharp chin. His heavy eyebrows that are shaped perfectly (”Ugh, you’re so fucking gross,” Reeve had said when Kai had voiced this thought aloud. “His eyebrows? I think you need to ask him out. Get it out of your system.”) and his eyes are that warm shade of brown, almost gold, soft and kind.

His hair is longer now, and errant curls flop over his forehead and around his ears. Kai watches the long line of Adam’s throat when he tilts his head back from the force of laughing at something Reeve said. Kai’s transfixed by the inviting stretch of dark skin, entertaining a thought of leaning over and just biting down so it’s not his fault he doesn’t see it coming when Reeve violently jabs him in the rib.

Kai jumps. “Ah! What the fuck?”

“Language,” Mr Tucker says in the toneless inflection of someone who doesn’t really care but responds on reflex. He’s now scrolling through Seasame Street videos.

Reeve shrugs, unrepentant. “You were gone there, dude.”

“Yeah,” Adam agrees, eyebrows raised in polite curiosity. “Planet Zenon gone.”

Kai ducks his head. “I’m, uh, stressed about AP physics?” he tries.

“Uh-huh,” Reeve says, “and are you asking us to confirm that for you?”

“Leave him alone,” Mira interrupts mildly. “Only, like, a hundred people a year get above a three on that exam.”

“Wow, how is that class still funded?” Adam asks.

“Elitism?” Mira guesses. “Maybe it’s like, a torture thing. Like, a test within a test.”

“What,” Reeve says, “like, if you pass you can become a super-secret spy?”

“Or I can, like, do another Chernobyl. Or I’m allowed secret access to government secrets. Ooh, maybe they’ll tell me the moon is a projection into the sky.” Kai says, warming to this idea.

“Then how would they explain waves?” Reeve asks.

“Uh, giant wave pool,” Kai answers.

“Hot take: the world is in a giant wave pool,” Mira grins at him.

Adam blinks almost in slow-motion, the sweep of his eyelashes against his cheeks, a smile growing on his face, and Kai is once again caught like a fly in honey. Just like that, all the saliva is gone from Kai’s mouth, and he’s completely lost the thread of whatever’s happening around him.

Okay, so, recap: totally, totally, totally screwed.

adam: U sure you’re ok driving me?

kai: dam i swear its fine

kai: i’d say something if it was a problem

kai: my parents have been trying to kick me out basically every weekend, this’ll make them so fucking happy

adam: Lol

adam: [A stock photo of two white parents sitting on a beach towel in a tropical location, smiling adoringly at each other. In the blurry background, a toddler with similar skin color and hair is being attacked by a seagull.]

“There is a PROBLEM!” Kai announces, flopping heavily onto his bed, tossing an arm dramatically over his forehead. Mira doesn’t even look up at him.

“Hm?” she says from the floor, knees drawn up to her chest, eyebrows furrowed in deep concentration. She’s looking more at her iPad than at him.

“Oh my God,” Kai groans. “You don’t even care. I’m nothing to you. You enjoy my suffering.”

“Die white man,” Mira says tonelessly. “I’m trying to beat my old high score in Tetris. What’s your damage.”

“I have nothing to wear on Friday,” Kai moans, pained.

“What? Why do you even care? Your regular clothes are fine.”

“Oh my God, Mira! It’s a party,” Kai breathes the word like its holy, a precious thing nestled in the crook of his tongue, not to be defiled by people who wear school clothes to special events. “And I want to get hit on.”

“I’ll hit on you,” Mira promises. The iPad makes a wah-wah-wah sound. She sighs, setting it aside and looking up at him, expression thoroughly unamused, clearly blaming him for her high-score loss.

“I did not do that,” Kai says. The blood’s started rushing to his head, so he sits up and blinks away the black spots as they dance in front of his vision. “I just wanna be hot,” he whines.

“Okay, so, wear that stupid blue button-up with the tigers on it, and the black skinny jeans. It brings out your eyes,” she elaborates. “And tucked-in button-ups are hot on dudes. Oh, and--”

“If you’re gonna Queer Eye me, I swear to God,” Kai complains.

“Will you just... I was gonna say you should wear a tiny bit of eyeliner. It’s like, accentuating your features or some shit.”

“Why should I trust you?” Kai asks playfully. “I’ve never seen you go anywhere near a make-up in my life.”

Mira shrugs. “I saw it on Instagram. Anyways, Reeve said I have ‘good bone structure’, what does that even mean?”

“That he’s an idiot and I can’t believe you’re into him?” Kai ventures. Mira glares at him, so Kai leans back on the bed, rolling his eyes up to the bedroom ceiling at the glow-in-the-dark stick-on stars that have been there since he was seven. “Okay, okay. He was probably trying to compliment you, but since he’s a robot sent by aliens to infiltrate the earth he did it in a really bizarre way.”

Mira perks up. “You think?”

“He said ‘good’.”

“What should I say back?”

“Erm, that you’ll have his babies?”

Mira throws one of her glittery highlighter pens at him. It bounces off the center of his forehead and onto his lap. He laughs, picking it up and tossing it back.

“I don’t know,” he admits. “Maybe say that you like his bones, too.”

Mira takes out her phone.

adam: [A picture of a pina colada sitting on a kitchen counter in a pool of sunlight.]

adam: Winky face

kai: you could just like, use the emoji keyboard instead of typing it out

adam: Don’t make me frowny face

Kai spends fifteen minutes messing with his hair in the mirror. He gels it sticking up, twists his mouth critically at his reflection, and wets his hands to wipe it out. Nothing’s working for him today. It’s just one of those things, his clothes seem to hang off him awkwardly, and nothing looks right.

He makes a sound of frustration, and his mom pokes her head into the bathroom.

“Oh,” she says. “I thought you were going to a party?”

“Mom,” he growls. “I’m getting ready!”

“Hm.”

She pushes the door all the way open, surveys him from head to toe, and reaches over to run a hand through his hair, leaving parts sticking up in her wake. Kai looks in the mirror. Now, instead of awkward ‘trying-too-hard’, he looks artfully tousled. He unbuttons two top buttons of his tiger shirt, and messes with the collar to make it look like someone had grabbed it and reeled him in for a kiss. He grins at himself.

“That’s better, I think,” she says.

“Thanks Mom,” he says, shuffling past her and out to the hallway.

“Limit yourself to three drinks!” she calls as he stuffs his feet into old converse. “If you get too intoxicated to drive, spend the night! Just text! Don’t forget to wear condoms and--”

Kai shuts the door in her face.

His car is a silver Prius, owned five times prior to him. The interior always smells a little bit like shamrock shake and in the winter requires a prayer and three engine turnovers to start. Kai loves it.

He pulls up to Adam’s street and texts without looking that he’s close. He parks in the street, and jogs up to Adam’s front door. He raps his knuckles on Adam’s door, the red one with caterpillar decals, and a blue handprint on the doorknob.

Adam throws open the door. “Gimme a sec, gotta grab my jacket.”

He’s wearing a white shirt and Kai’s favorite jeans of his (do Not judge him, okay, liking your crush’s ass is basically a given and is no longer considered a sin under the New Testament, so really Kai’s not weird for liking this pair of Adam’s jeans because it accentuates his butt.), the ones with rips in the thigh and at both knees, because Adam lives reckless and dies reckless.

He jams his feet into vans and grabs the heavy olive jacket off the coatrack and follows Kai out to the Prius.

“You look nice,” Adam says, offhand. Kai feels how hot his face immediately gets and hopes it isn’t ugly, sometimes his blushes look like a rash.

“Thanks,” he says, rubbing his neck, right hand fumbling for his keys.

They slide into their seats, and Kai is hit with the violent-sense memory of Hennesy whiskey, and dark streetlamps, and Adam’s soft voice and brown puppy-dog eyes imploring Kai, look at me. Look at me, please. And. And.

His phone buzzes.

“Oh, Vanessa wants us to pick up some soda,” Kai says through the rock in his throat.

“Ooh, ooh. Cherry 7-Up, Jarritos Lime, uh like, a ton of Mountain Dew... and Coke! We’ll need Coke,” Adam rambles as Kai pulls away from the street and heads toward the local general store.

mira: WHERE

mira: R

mira: U

mira: 2

mira: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kai frowns at his phone. They’re in the check-out line, waiting for their turn with about three tons of soda on the conveyer. Kai’s got a fifty dollar bill from his parents, because they’re stupidly open-minded, but he’s still gonna make Vanessa pay him back. Adam’s inspecting the tabloids, making comments about all of the covers and whatever he thinks about them.

kai: WE’RE

kai: FUCKING

(Not sent !) kai: GETTING

(Not sent !) kai: DRINKS

mira: FUHDUK WHATTTT!!!?????????

Kai groans.

The party’s already alive by the time Adam and Kai get there, music thrumming against the walls of the house, the glass panes of the windows shaking with the vibrations. Weighed down by plastic bags full of drinks, and a little bit anxious, Kai fumbles with the door handle three times until Adam reaches over him and opens it.

The crowd is huge. He didn’t even know that Vanessa and Skeet knew this many people. There’s a wall of heat that hits them when they step inside, the difference between the inside and outside must be a solid ten degrees. Most people are crammed in the living room, near the speakers, where a sort of impromptu dancefloor has evolved. There are plenty of people lining the hallways, sitting on the stairs, and spilling over into the other places of the house.

Vanessa has changed the lightbulbs to fuschia, cobalt, and teal colors, so the house looks almost like a club from a TV show. There’s this haze over everything - and, yep, definitely Skeet’s weed - that makes it seem smoky and mysterious. Adam kicks the door shut behind them as they begin to navigate the crowd.

Skeet’s leaning against one of the walls, talking to a tiny girl with piercings and too much eyeliner. She tosses her head, her hair flying up like a halo for a moment, luminescent in the multicolored lights of the house, and leans closer to Skeet. She’s holding a red solo cup, Skeet’s holding weed, and Kai’s arms are starting to hurt from all the soda.

“So, your, like, real name is Skeet? What kind of name is that? I mean, like, who does that to their kid?” she’s asking, valley girl accent and everything, even twirling a strand of hair around her finger.

Skeet shrugs, unbothered. “My parents are hippies.” he spots them, then, and lifts his joint in a get over here gesture. Kai and Adam shove some people to stand in front of him. He grins. “Oh, dudes, nice. You got drinks. I wasn’t sure if you would, since Mira told us that you, uh, made a pit stop.” he waggles his eyebrows.

Kai groans, flushing.

“Uh, yeah,” Adam says, lifting up his bags. “for drinks? Hello?”

Skeet leers, grin stretching bigger. Kai scowls. He’s going to eat her one day, all Hannibal-Lecter style.

“Where is Mira, anyway?” he cuts in before Skeet says anything weird. “Where should we put the drinks?”

“Oh, just, you know,” Skeet makes a vague gesture with his hand that doesn’t really mean anything. “I think I saw her in the kitchen?”

“Thanks,” Kai mutters, shoving through the crowd and deeper into the house.

Mira and Vanessa are leaning against the sink, Reeve’s standing at the counter, completely covered in bottles of alcohol, thumb and forefinger at his chin like he’s surveying fine art.

“Oh! You made it! I hate vodka without coke,” Mira says, striding forward and grabbing the bags from Adam.

Kai followers her back to the counter, and shoves the receipt into Vanessa’s limp hands without looking at her. Together, Kai and Mira start to set up the drink line, stacking up all the empty red cups at the edge of the counter as they try to make sure all the soda and alcohol are equally accessible. How Skeet even gets this stuff... he shudders to think.

Kai waits until Adam and Reeve have wandered out of earshot to lean into Mira’s space. Vanessa had vacated the premise the moment it looked like any physical work would be happening, so he doesn’t worry about her particular brand of nosiness. He takes his phone out of his pocket and tilts the screen so she can see it.

“My texts didn’t send,” he tells her in a low voice. “We weren’t actually, you know.” he flushes violently.

Mira shoots him a grin. “No, I guessed that something had happened. It was just funny. You look nice.”

He smiles at her, genuinely, which means his gums are probably showing. She looks nice too, in her little black dress with a flared skirt and combat boots. The neon green streaks in her hair glow in the weird light of the house.

“I like your outfit,” he says. The din in the background is starting to grow. More people have probably showed up.

She nods at his jeans. “Cuffed jeans. The true mark of a bisexual.”

Kai nods very seriously. “I can’t leave my house without announcing every aspect of my sexuality to the entire world.”

Adam’s talking to a group of people at the other end of the kitchen, his smile is blindly white in the pink light, skin pitched a shade darker, a stark difference against the glow of his white shirt. Staring, unable to look away, Kai steals Mira’s cup and takes a swig. It’s straight vodka, so Kai coughs immediately when it hits his tongue.

Mira laughs at him.

Group: party 🎉🥂🥳🎊 time

speedyskeet: do any of u know anyone named travis montery

mirakat: no

lochnessa: No

abeaverdam: Nope!

humantorchkai: no

reever: nah

speedyskeet: fucking L lmao

speedyskeet: im kicking this fool out then

Kai’s wandering around, pleasantly buzzed from two Cherry 7-Ups with a tiny bit of vodka, looking for any familiar face. Mira and Reeve had abandoned him pretty much straight away, he’d left Adam alone in the kitchen, and he’s actively avoiding Vanessa.

He stumbles around, moving his shoulders a bit in time with the music, his body gone languid and loose from the heat and the alcohol and the atmosphere.

His phone beeps at him again. He really hopes it's not Skeet checking with them before he bounces a guy again. It’s just Mira, he sees, when he’s fumbled his phone out of his back pocket. He has to squint to read in the pink light amid the thrumming bodies of people all around him.

Eventually, he escapes the crowd and heads down the stairs to the “game room” and finds another living room, with a soft white carpet and a couch in front of a big flatscreen. There’s a group of about a dozen kids, plus Kai’s friends, sitting on the carpet in a circle by the couch, with a beer bottle laying on a Monopoly game board. Kai blinks, the lights here aren’t fun colors, and everyone in the circle raises their arms and cheers when they see him.

He walks over to them. Mira grabs his arm and begins to drag him onto the carpet beside her. The group begins to chant.

“Spin the bottle! Spin the bottle!”

Oh, no fuck, Kai thinks, beginning to resist Mira’s grip on his arm. His drink is sloshing about, and Kai holds it away from his shirt and pants as he tries to reverse his crouch and pull his arm back. Skeet reaches up and confiscates the cup, downing the rest of it in one go.

“Spin the bottle! Spin the bottle! Spin the bottle!”

But he’s buzzed and his coordination is spotty, so when Adam reaches out with his hand and spins the beer bottle, Mira tugs once, hard, and Kai crashes onto the carpet, and the bottle spins,

and spins,

and spins.

And points the neck straight at Kai’s disheveled spot in the circle.

So, let’s revisit that cursed theory, shall we?

Kai looks at Adam, and Adam looks at him. He’s got that dopey half-smile on his face, and his pupils are blown wide, iris a thin gold ring around them. Kai knows when Adam’s drunk, or blackout, and he’s tipsy right now, just like Kai. And... oh no. But the kids in the circle are jeering, giggling delightedly.

“Uh,” Kai says.

Adam licks his lips, and Kai tracks the movement of his tongue helplessly. His eyes are moving on Kai’s face, like he’s cataloging everything, like he can’t keep them still. Kai’s mouth is very, very dry, and he misses having the cup in his hand.

“So, uh,” he says, and the tension buzzes even harder. “Is this, like, a kissing thing?”

Skeet grabs him by the arms and manhandles him up. Reeve and Vanessa grab Adam and start frogmarching them down the short hall toward some rooms and closed doors.

“No,” Skeet says, “This is more like a seven minutes in heaven thing.”

“Wait,” Kai says. Skeet reaches past him and opens a door. “Wait.” Skeet pushes him in, and Adam follows behind. “Wait.” The door clicks shut, then there's a clunk, then the sound of something heavy being pushed against the door.

Kai tries the knob, but it's locked. He jiggles it, but his muscles won’t cooperate and yank hard enough. Adam could probably break it open, but Kai has the vague thought of Vanessa’s parents and property damage, and underage drinking.

“Guys!” Adam yells. He pounds on the door with his fist. “Guys! This isn’t funny!”

But they don’t answer.

Evil. Mental note: make sure your friends aren’t evil next time.

“Looks like we’ll be trapped for a while,” Kai sighs, giving up on the door.

They’ll just have to wait out the seven-minute sentence. It’s simultaneously worse and so much better than the alternative. This way, Adam won’t have to kiss Kai if he doesn’t want to. But also: he won’t have to kiss Kai if he doesn’t want to. It’s a testament to how drunk all of them really are.

Kai turns, presses his back against the door, and slides down it, pulling his knees to his chest, wrapping his hands around his shins, and resting his cheek on his knee. He surveys the room. It’s small and dark, Kai doesn’t have the wherewithal to search for the light switch, but from what Kai can see it looks like a guest room no one ever uses and has accumulated with old junk. There’s a tiny window at the opposite wall that leads up to the lawn. Adam groans and drops onto the ground beside Kai.

The night is clear the moonlight is touching the window and peeking into the room. Adam’s shirt is glowing against his skin from the moonlight, his eyes a bright point in the semi-dark of the room. Kai locks eyes with Adam, and the tension from earlier crops back up tenfold.

This situation is... stupidly pointed. Kai’s pretty sure Reeve is the only person in the world who knows Kai thinks Adam is kinda hot, but he’d also have to be massively stupid to ignore the strain in their friend group lately.

Adam’s looking at him the way he does right before he reaches out to touch Kai’s hair, or brush his fingers against Kai’s freckles, or leans over to kiss Kai’s cheek. He’s looking at Kai like a hungry man, like he’s about to make the stupidest decision of his life and never look back. Kai can feel the pull of that look drawing him in, the temptation to run his hands against Adam’s chest, touching his shoulders or his mouth.

So Kai does the only thing he can think of.

“What did you think of that new Hey Arthur episode?”

Adam blinks at him. “Uh. You mean that kids show?”

Kai bites his lip and nods vigorously.

Totally. Totally. Totally screwed.

reeb: [A video of Mira on the dancefloor among a huge throng of teens. The song in the background is completely drowned out by people attempting to sing along drunkenly. She’s grinding against Vanessa, who’s wearing Skeet’s sunglasses and drinking a mimosa with a cocktail umbrella in it.]

(Not sent !) kai: let us out of here!!! its been like 15 mins!!!! guys!!! dam’s phone is dead!!!!!

(Not sent !) kai: goddamn it COME GET US

(Not sent !) kai: NOTHING IS SENDING!!

reeb: lol wya we cant find dam either

(Not sent !) kai: YOU LEFT US IN THE BASEMENT

“Ugh,” Kai says, flopping back down onto the pillows beside Adam. At some point during their imprisonment slash debate on the ethics of twenty-three seasons of the same children’s cartoon, they’d moved from the floor to the twin bed. “I’m pretty sure they forgot about us.”

“Well, it’s been like thirty minutes. And they’re drunk.”

Kai’s starting to sober up. He has to pee, and his mouth tastes like cherry coughdrops. He stands up on the bed, bouncing a bit on the mattress. He reaches up and touches the seam of the window and the sill.

“What are you doing?” Adam asks, trepidation in his voice.

“Uh, escaping?” Kai says.

Kai presses his foot onto the upside down elliptical that’s propped precariously against an old wardrobe. He puts some of his weight on it, testing. Satisfied that it won’t give, Kai lifts himself up onto it, closer to the window, and pushes against the glass pane. The window opens out suddenly, making Kai wobble. The wardrobe groans.

“Careful!” Adam barks.

Kai glances back at Adam, his worried eyes watching Kai from the bed, sitting up on his knees in a half crouch. Kai sticks his head out the narrow window, then his shoulders, and manages to drag himself up and out.

He turns back around and offers his hand to Adam.

“Come on,” he says. “I’ll help you out.”

Adam climbs up onto the elliptical like Kai had, reaches his right hand to Kai’s left and uses his left to leverage himself closer to the window. The wardrobe and the elliptical make that sound again, like they’re scraping together.

“Hurry!” Kai says, afraid of the whole makeshift apparatus falling apart. Adam’s left palm slaps against Kai’s right and Kai pulls.

The elliptical falls over as Kai yanks Adam up, a great big crash resounding in the room they just escaped. Kai’s momentum and Adam’s weight makes Kai step back once, then twice, then his footing goes and he sprawls onto his back, Adam on top of him, in one big undignified heap.

Adam looks down at him. He looks more sober, too, like he hasn’t had much to drink. Kai should really be pushing Adam off of him. Or trying to sit up. But his hands are on Adam’s waist, and Adam’s looking at Kai’s face like he can’t quite look at anything else, and Kai cannot, for the life of him, break this moment.

Adam’s hands are on either side of Kai’s face, boxing him in. His breath puffs against Kai’s mouth over and over as he breathes shallowly. His eyes flick all over Kai’s face, and Kai’s thinking kiss me, please so hard he’s pretty sure NASA catches the brainwaves.

“I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice,” he says, voice soft and vulnerable, like Kai has the power to hurt him with whatever Kai says next.

Kai’s hands tighten on Adam’s waist. He’s thought about this a lot. Like, a stupid amount. Who doesn’t daydream about confessing to your crush? But Kai cannot dredge up any words to say. He’s dry, completely dry, and he can only think about how good Adam’s weight feels on him. He dips his eyes to Adam’s mouth and thinks This is where I kiss him, right? and Adam’s eyes slide shut as he leans in, towards Kai, and Kai loses his mind.

The backdoor opens, the sounds of the party spilling out into the night air, pink light washing over them. Adam scrambles off Kai so fast that he’s pretty sure he breaks the world record for speed, and stands up.

Kai props himself onto his elbows and squints at the silhouette in the doorway.

“Vanessa?”

“Oh my God, there you guys are!” she leans back into the house to yell, “Guys! I found Adam and Kai! They were fucking around in the backyard!”

“Hey!” Adam snaps indignantly. “You locked us in the basement! We had to escape!”

Vanessa rolls her eyes at them.

adam: hey uh

adam: sorry about what i said when i was drunk lol

adam: i didn’t mean it

Kai turns his phone off and stuffs it into his bag, frustrated. He hadn’t meant to not talk to Adam all weekend, he’d just needed to think things through, and then his dad had asked him to help paint the deck, and he’d had to finish up some code for robotics and time had kinda slipped away from him without really meaning to.

He hadn’t meant to ignore everyone else, either, but they weren’t in a Situation with Kai on Friday night, and he’s not in love with them, and they didn’t seem to mind so much.

Kai had spent all weekend staring at the texts, in between being too busy to answer them, but he can’t figure out what to say back. He’d gotten them Saturday morning after the party, probably because he hadn’t stuck around long enough to be left alone with Adam again.

Kai had left because.

Well, because.

Because he feels played.

Is that it? He can’t tell. He just feels so hollow about it. Adam doesn’t mean to, Kai knows that, but it still feels like he’s being led on. Adam has kissed him once while black out and almost kissed him while tipsy and flirts pretty outrageously, and it’s all too much for Kai’s head, which is designed for building robots and lying to his English teachers.

So at lunch, instead of going to Mr Tucker’s room, he lets Freddie from Calc drag him to the auditorium to help build the drama department’s Spring play set.

He’s not avoiding anyone. He’s just... helping his friends.

Fuck.

reeb: ok i give

reeb: wtf is going on

kai: ?

reeb: don’t “?” me mfer

reeb: adam is sulking n shit and u’ve been sorta MIA

kai: i’ve been busy, sorry

kai: i am the captain of a team u know. its not personal. i’ll hang out with you guys soon

reeb: spidey sense says there is something u are not telling me

kai: i really do think your spidey sense is actually overactive bladder syndrome

reeb: [An image of the caveman spongebob meme.]

He’s in the library, sitting in his favorite spot nestled in the bookshelves, brow furrowed over The Great Gatsby, his English journal, the notes Hannah lent him, and the Sparknotes page for the novel, surrounded by every color highlighter and pen, just trying to get his homework done, when Adam ambushes him.

“You’re avoiding me,” he says, out of nowhere.

Kai jumps, sending his highlighters and books flying. Adam is standing above him, eyebrows furrowed and his arms crossed. He looks a little bit light a superhero, all righteous indignation at injustice, his muscles buldging slightly. You’re dead. Goodbye. his brain supplies.

“Holy shit,” he says, gathering his stuff back up slowly. “You scared me.”

Adam’s eyes soften. “Sorry,” he murmurs.

Kai shrugs. “Don’t worry about it.”

The silence hangs there as Kai avoids his gaze, reshuffling Hannah’s notes back into their correct order. He’s lost his page in the book, so he opens it to the middle and starts looking for the correct page number. There’s no sound in this corner of the library except for Kai’s over-loud breathing and the turning of pages.

Go away go away go away, Kai prays, wanting the world to end so he won’t ever have to face this moment. He thinks about the echo of Adam’s voice in his memory, Kai, look at me, the feeling of Adam’s weight in his lap, the ache Kai feels when he looks at Adam, and wishes that he could just stand up and run.

Adam clears his throat. “You’ve been avoiding me,” he says again, only this time it comes out more like a question.

Kai keeps his face as blank as possible, schools it into something politely curious unlike the shattered glass mosaic he feels like. “Am I?”

Adam rubs his hand across the back of his neck. “Look, I’m sorry,” he says haltingly, sliding his hands into his pockets. “I shouldn’t have... come on to you like that. It was inappropriate, and we were both drunk. And I didn’t mean it.”

Kai looks at him for a long moment. He can feel it, a rock on his chest, crushing him. He feels the ball in his throat, the hot prickle against the backs of his eyelids. “I know,” he says eventually. His voice comes out steady, even though he feels like he’s falling apart.

“So... we’re cool?”

Kai forces himself to nod. “Okay.”

“Really? Because I still feel like I fucked up somewhere here.” Adam takes his hands out of his pockets to open them, palms up, like he’s pleading. “Tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it.”

And it’s now or never. As much as Kai abhors the idea of talking about his feelings in the school library at 4 PM, as much as he wants to just lie through his teeth and stitch this all back up into one big internal bag of FUCK and pretend like nothing happened, he’d be leaving Adam hanging, and Kai’s not a dick.

He takes a deep breath. Then another one. He tries to channel his internal Reeve, but decides against it because Reeve’s kinda an asshole.

“I just... wish you did,” Kai says eventually. If he wasn’t himself, he’d slap him. Adam stares at Kai like he’d just spoken another language, like he’d just spat out part of a puzzle to piece together.

“Wish I did... what?” he asks slowly.

“Mean it,” Kai grits out, the words dragged from him. He feels ridiculous. This is stupid.

“Mean...?” Adam says, like he’s stupid. Kai scowls at him.

“Do you remember the St Eve’s party?”

Adam shrugs, looking helpless and confused.

“I drove you home that party. I drive you home every party. And every time we’re alone, you say that you like me, that you want me to go inside with you, that you think about me all the time,” Kai’s stomach is churning and Adam looks like he’s about to faint.

“I didn’t...”

Kai can’t hear him say it again. “And I know that you’re just drunk, and that’s just what you’re like when you’re drunk, but I just... I just wanted it to be true so bad. Part of me kept driving you home because I wanted you to be like that with me, part of me just wanted to pretend. But then you kissed me, and I just...” Kai makes a helpless gesture with his hands.

Adam licks his lips. He’s breathing a bit hard.

“...Fell apart,” Kai finishes.

Adam’s looking at him, wide-eyed, deer-in-the-headlights look, pure panic. Kai’s fucked it up, ruined their friendship, destroyed their friend-group, and will probably be unable to look anyone in the eye for a very long time.

Adam didn’t want to hear this. Kai should’ve just lied, shut it all up and let himself wither up inside. He should’ve avoided Adam harder, or refrained from falling in love with him in the first place. He should’ve just dated Jesse when she’d asked and made himself get over Adam.

“How long?”

Kai blinks. “Huh?”

“How long have you wanted...?” he shrugs.

Ah. The million dollar question.

“Officially? Middle of junior year. If I’m honest with myself? Probably since middle school.”

Adam’s mouth opens and closes nonsensically. Kai asks God to strike him down, just so this can end, just so Kai can go back to trying to figure out what the fuck is up with Gatsby and Jay, just so Adam will stop looking at him like that, like Kai’s killed his puppy.

Adam drops to his knees in front of Kai.

“Okay. Since freshman year. And I’m a liar. I did mean it. I kept thinking, you know, maybe you’d like me back, because I could see you looking, but I just couldn’t make myself say anything. And I meant it. I mean it. I do. I want to kiss you.”

Kai swallows. He’s feeling that dangerous thing again, like there are snakes in his chest, or his feelings are in a bucket that’s about to overflow.

“Okay,” he squeaks out.

Adam leans down and fits their mouths together. It’s chaste, and Kai’s lips are a little bit chapped, and he didn’t close his eyes, but when Adam pulls back Kai smiles so hard his mouth hurts.

And he leans up to kiss Adam, insistent, insistent, tasting Adam without Hennessy whiskey (and he does taste fantastic), and something electric happens to Kai’s spine when their tongues touch. He feels like he’s going to burn up, burst into stars, create a fissure in the earth that goes down to the core, or all three at once.

Adam licks along the roof of Kai’s mouth and yeah - that’s the one thing he’d like to never, ever, ever forget.

He’s about to be totally, totally, totally screwed.

Group: dandilyin hoes MFERsssss!! skeet DONT CHANGE CHAT NAME

mirakat: omfg

mirakat: k & a suckin face in library

mirakat: [A blurry creeper picture of Kai pressed against the bookshelves, Adam leaning over him. Their silhouettes are blacked out against the sunlight streaming in through the window, so they almost look like one body. It’s taken at an angle and half of a wooden shelf is in frame.]

speedyskeet: arent they in this GC too

lochnessa: Lmfaaooooooo

speedyskeet: they r gonna see this.....

reever: WTF ADAM’S INTO KAI???

reever: ?????

lochnessa: What planet do you live on

speedyskeet: fuckin jesus christ reeb

locknessa: Literally no one knew KAI was into Adam. EVERYONE KNEW ADAM WAS INTO KAI

reever: WHY AM I THE LAST ONE TO KNOW STUFF

mirakat: s2g i tld u this whn we were @ fortescue’s u nvr listen 2 me

“I hate them all,” Kai announces.

Adam looks up at him from where his head is pillowed on Kai’s thighs, Pride and Prejudice held aloft.

“Don’t worry, I set all their ringtones to Maroon 5.”

send me a ship + a prompt and i’ll write you a drabble!

#The Hollow #My writing #answer #kaidam

140 notes · View notes

silver-wield · 4 years

Note

body language analysis: tifa and cloud train scene!! go!

Oh, Nonny, you made my morning with this!! I mean, it's not like I haven't touched on Cloud and Tifa's body language in gif reblogs, but an actual post dedicated to one of the best moments of the game? YAY!!

Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who haven't played (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and it's gonna be a long one so prepare to scroll.

Also, this is one person's interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree that's cool and we'll agree to disagree.

You're also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, I'm grabbing them from Youtube and it's frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want.

Other analyses if anyone's interested.

Shinra HQ vision scene (Cloti/plot analysis)

Chapter 3 (Cloti reblog)

Tifa character analysis

Aerith Resolution (plot analysis)

Train graveyard (not really an analysis, but I got some sweet screenshots of Cloti)

Now, strap in and enjoy the ride.

So, the corkscrew tunnel scene – or clotiscrew tunnel as I've seen it called – begins with Avalanche caught by the sensors on the train. After a timed fight – which, yes, it's possible to lose, but it's also clear this is a “bad ending” where you've made Cloud look like an incompetent dick who can't even handle a few drones – we see Barret mustering his courage and leaping from the train (he's so damn cute sometimes, I'm gonna have to do a post about his development with Cloud at some point).

The action then cuts to Tifa, frozen in front of the door, too afraid to jump (you can hear her whimpering). Cloud calls her name, deals with the last drone and comes over. Now, in the OG, obviously they all jump one after the other because polygons and popeye arms would've just looked like a total mess and Square admitted they neglected Cloti to highlight all the relationship development between Clerith since she dies later.

Cut to 2020 and we get this. Damn, Square, if I didn't already love you for pretty much my entire life already I'd have fallen for you all over again. In fact, I think I probably did.

Ok, I'm done gushing. Kinda.

I think the first thing I have to point out is that Cloud, at no point, needed to do this. He could have verbally encouraged Tifa to jump without the need for physical support at all. After all, the train's slowing down and she was fine in the OG, so who's to say she wouldn't be fine now, too? By calling her name and fixing her attention on him he's actually stalling her jump.

You'll notice that Tifa doesn't take her eyes off the tracks (before this screen obvs since I can see that’s her feet, work with me here), which is fitting since she's zeroed in on that fearful moment and actually can't move without help. Cloud's face in this is displaying typical tension you'd expect in a high energy scene. He's concerned for Tifa, but he's also focused on dealing with the mechs, which he does very quickly. Now, you could argue he did that to get on with the mission, or you could argue he did that because he saw Tifa needed him and his focus shifted to her. And watching the seconds following him turning to look at her, I'd say there's evidence towards the latter because he's actually lost focus on the last mech and it attacks him first causing him to block and parry.

This is the first instance of touching in this scene, and until this point, Tifa hadn't moved or acknowledged Cloud. He needed to physically draw her from her thoughts and you'll hear a surprised exhale from her as she turns to look at him, showing she was lost within herself until he drew her out. Cloud is obviously looking at the tracks, judging his next move. He's already planning what he has to do to keep both of them safe, which is clear from his decisive nod, along with a reassuring, but grim, smile, before pulling Tifa out the door. Remember, I said he could’ve verbally got her attention. He didn’t. He chose touch.

See what I mean about janky quality? Anyway, this is clear concern about Tifa's safety, but also, remember, Cloud is on the mission because Tifa said she felt trapped and he's related that back to their promise that she needs a hero. He's being her hero.

Okay, we're getting to the meat of things now.

First, fucking ouch, he definitely looks pained, meaning that whole manoeuvre wasn't as smooth as he pretended. As they slow down, he puts a bracing hand against the ground to prevent him rolling onto Tifa (because he's a gent and also toting a sword that weighs more than Barret lol).

What's interesting is where his left hand is in this. Make a note: middle of her back. Tifa's head is tucked into Cloud's neck – safety move, so nothing big there. I've seen some people note Tifa's leg is between Cloud's, but I'm gonna discount that as the way they've locked together during the roll. It's unintentional.

Oh, but this isn't! Cloud has absolutely no reason to put his hand back on Tifa. He could leave it lying flat on the ground. You could argue he needs both to help her get off him, but she's on top. She can do that herself. He has no further need past the initial save to have his hands on her, unless that's what he wants. Obviously we can't see his face in this because of Tifa's hair, but this, combined with the next screen tell a very definite story.

He moved his hand! That left hand, he didn't need to move it up in such a caressing gesture. Coupled with the very intense gaze he gives her, I was swooning like a maiden wearing a too tight corset lol

Now, you could argue he's just concerned, it's a high tension situation. Well, I argue that every single trope using this kind of scene results in sexual tension/flustered characters and/or a kiss. Remember, right at this second, he has no reason to still be lying with her like this. In fact, him moving his hand further up her back is a bracing gesture that would keep her close, not release her. Tifa's fists are balled against his chest, which signifies she's protecting her hands – she's a hand-to-hand fighter remember -- but her face is relaxed. She's not feeling awkward or eager to escape.

Eye contact!! Can I just leave it at that? No? Cloud isn't actually the type to keep prolonged eye contact. Oh, did you think I was about to say something else? Well, for literally anyone who hasn't paid attention to him, Cloud often looks away when he feels awkward, flustered, unsure, basically any negative emotion. The only time he looks anyone in the eye is when he's confronting them or at ease. Remember, even when Jessie teased him about smiling during chapter 4 he looked away, embarrassed. Cloud doesn't handle eye contact well. Which is why this is such a huge deal. He's keeping prolonged eye contact with Tifa. He doesn't look away from her eyes when he asks if she's ok. And that question – ah my heart! So soft and tender. You can hear the care and concern in his tone. It anchors the entire scene from start to finish. Everything he just did was because he cares about Tifa and wants to look after her. He wants to make sure she's ok, even if it means he suffers for it. Pretty sure some people will disagree with this, but the damn man wore a dress and went through a humiliating dance routine – humiliating for him, I fucking loved it – just to save her. His first words in Wall Market are he wants to save Tifa, but Aerith cuts him off before he can finish the sentence.

These are the moments that I have to go back over a million times to catch. Check the tiny eye narrowing and uplift at the corner of his mouth. She said she's ok and he's happy about it. He's her hero – in not so many words. Tifa's shaky reply and pale face confirm her shock and fear, but also you can see an easing of the tension in her. There's a subtle softening of her muscle definition and facial expression that displays the trust and belief she has in Cloud that he'd look after her. This is a very mutually appreciative moment between them. Definitely not one sided.

And then the moment is over, without any flustered blushing or stammering, and thank God there wasn't because that would be so ooc I just can't with it. Cloud, despite being an awkward af dork who doesn't know how to deal with women hitting on him, doesn't turn into a flustered 14 year old trying to tell his crush he's leaving Nibelheim whenever they have contact. We've already seen smooth!Cloud giving Tifa a flower and complimenting her like a cheeky bastard. He can handle being around her because he feels comfortable. He can compliment her because of that, too. He might be slightly separated from those childhood feelings, but they're in there and they're motivating him to be outgoing towards her. To show her the cool SOLDIER he became that's worthy of being beside her.

But, yeah, back to the point. The moment is over. Or is it? Because that is some very further prolonged eye contact between them when there doesn't have to be. Tifa moves back, Cloud moves forward, they're both getting up and yet, they're both looking at each other. I don't know about you, but I find it easier to look where I'm going when I've fallen on my ass and need to get up. I sure af don't stare longingly into someone's eyes like I can't bear not to.

And now it really is over because right after this the mechs arrive. But before that, some more prolonged eye contact. There literally is no need for them to do this at this point. Tifa looks pensive, but I think that's her default tbf. Yet, at the same time, there's an intensity in her gaze like she wants to say something – maybe it's just a thank you, that would turn into a flirty conversation of some sort “you didn't need to do that,” “I wanted to” kind of deal – so it makes sense they're interrupted because Square said they didn’t want to overdo the amount of Cloti content they added and this is already a very charged scene.

Meanwhile, Cloud is looking at her like she's his entire world and he's just waiting for her to realise it. There's an aura of expectation in his pose and face. They're both crouching in mirrored poses, which as some of you may know is what you do when you're trying to build rapport with someone. It's basic body language building blocks. Toddlers do this. They're both on one knee, slightly leaning forward. Now, if there was no rapport between them, if they wanted to end the moment, one of them would stand up, breaking the mirrored pose and cutting off eye contact. This would put one above the other and show an imbalance in their relationship. This doesn't happen. They both turn at the same time, rise at the same time and fight pose at the same time.

Conclusion:

Seriously? After all that you can't draw your own?

Ok, I'll be fair to the other side. Let's take away Cloud's history with Tifa – since that's the biggest argument for them: the childhood crush trope.

If Cloud and Tifa weren't friends, just colleagues on a mission, this scene would still be hella charged with sexual tension and implication that Cloud has a thing for her. Even if it's just basic sexual attraction, that's still attraction and a marker on the pathway to a relationship.

But, they are friends, so moving on.

Tifa is the more reserved one in this dynamic. She's naturally shy – it's canon – but even with that, she's affected by Cloud. She holds that eye contact. Her voice is equally soft as his. She mirrors his pose. She doesn't try to get away the second they stop moving. Cloud is the one to move things along, without awkwardness because he's comfortable with Tifa. He's not out of sorts having her lying on top of him – which you can argue means he's not interested, but I literally just pointed out all the ways in which he is into her. Being comfortable in someone's company doesn't mean a person isn't attracted to them. If I had to stick a pin in Cloud's sexuality I'd say he's on the demi scale, meaning he needs to have a deep emotional connection to whoever he's with before he falls in love with them. He's not a love at first sight kind of guy.

This fits with the childhood crush trope. Cloud's known Tifa for years and developed an attraction to her that still lingers, making a reconnection between them easier. He's not slobbering over her because he's Cloud and very stoic – I know people say his true self isn't like this, but it is only with more insecurity and desire to prove himself. He's still a very reserved guy with a dry sense of humour. He's prone to melancholy and self doubt, which is why his friends bolster his confidence so much.

Point is, everything in this scene showcases a deep and meaningful relationship between the two of them at its best, while at its most shallow it shows Cloud is sexually attracted to Tifa, which is something that could develop into a more meaningful relationship later. Either way, it's a marked moment in their interactions that Cloud's non-optional choices led to it. There's no either/or within this. It happened.

#cloti #final fantasy 7 remake spoilers #final fantasy 7 remake analysis

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beecherdrysdale · 3 years

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Hehe hiii I’m writing this before I go on the treadmill lol.

Alright the screaming will be non stop- and I’ll be glad to make girls jealous lol. I am ready to distract some kids. “GO BRIGID!!!!” Yes we do have some vv hit friends esp you brigid, with dyl and Jamie 😏 the girls would be sooo jealous. Ryan and I bumping each other around will be a regular occurrence. Imao “not again...” yesss the boys are embarrassed but still hold onto each other! Hehe poor Quinners hand. Hmmm maybe I will make it up to him later 😏. Dyl would be a nervous wreck lol. I’d probably throw my sweater at him so that he can close his eyes, but he would still annoy me and ask every 5 secs “is she winning?” “How is she doing” “I can’t look” “this is too much for me to handle” and I chirp him so hard, but would understand because he really likes you :)

Ya right after shower etc. And we go out to celebrate the chirping restarts. I would have to many in my head. At the end of the day Jamie and dylan were amazing and you are proud of them. I’ll be sure to try squeezy applesauce!! Hehe I eat cliff bars between breaks but recently stopped because it took me forever to chew lol so now I just bring a banana to my matches. Brigid we should go to Costco together and ride in the cart- I would probably not bring the boys just cuz Costco’s huge and we would lose them hehe.

Yess team TRAMPLE GET READY. We promise not to damage your suit:) the girls would be jealous hehe.

Ig it is hard. But we understand. If me, you and kesh go to their games, would you sit across the rink or w us lol?. Cactus club is great, the food is très bien. Same w Cora! I’ll take you there !!

Imao people would be so confused on why I was crying but I just saw all of you 🥺 yay pls distract me while I warm up my hips w my resistance band lol. Nah it isn’t weird that you aren’t nervous. Look I’m a confident driver but that entire day was weird. It was summer and like an hour and a half before, I was getting my legs waxed lol and my legs were super slippery because of the oil they put on you after hehe. So first of all I was nervous all ready (shaking lol) and then in the car my entire seat was just so slippery, so that didn’t help and it was like plus 29. But anyways I passed, so ig going through that horrible experience was worth it. I’d probably make eye contact w y’all in between points and just burst out laughing but it’s ok. imao at the end I hit Ryan in the face w a ball. He would be mad cuz you start dying of laughter beside him and Jamie’s like panicking because he doesn’t know what to do and he just get you water. But you are still laughing . I’m down on the court also laughing and Ryan’s just trying to climb and get onto the court to chase me around hehe. Awww Quinner my bb, gotta give him my post match kiss. Ooo time to sometimes like I yell at the screen, but I could just see you being annoyed and yelling.

Ooo yes it’s getting semi spicy at Coachella. Dylan’s getting handsy 😏. Ya Jamie would just be glaring at Dylan’s back lol. And you’re just enjoying the view of Dylan’s hair and the performance lol. Oooo you can play w his hair. Aw thank u Braden for offering, I’ll take you up on that .but I can just see Quinner glaring at us too and getting flustered. He would get so annoyed hehe. I’m so oblivious sometimes, but I get down from bradens shoulders and go on yours lol. You can go on mine too:). meanwhile kesh is just in kirbys shoulders chilling and not even paying attention to what’s happening. Oo I’m not a big fan of makeup. I never wear it. I only have a clear lipgloss that I wear to events and sometimes I don’t even wear it lol.

Imma be honest we will probably not last very long on each other’s shoulders but It would be so cute if you are just watching one of the performances and Dylan or Jamie just come behind you and wrap their arms around your waist from behind and put their chins on top of your shoulder or head 🥺 and you are just swaying to the music with them .... Coachella is so fun at night according to the videos my bro has due to the lights and the fireworks that they release at night!! So you can kiss under the fireworks 🥰.

Our outfits would be amazing, like Brigid your hair would be so cute in Dutch braids!! Hehe yes the guys would look so hot, and not even try but just imagine being at Coachella w this team!! We gotta make sure we don’t forget sunscreen lol . And water, gotta hydrate !!

-Lexi

lol that’s fun, we love the treadmill. jk i hate treadmills, i feel like i’m not going anywhere when i’m on the treadmill and i can’t stand it. anywaysssss long post

lmao yes please distract my competition so i can win hehe. honestly it might work bc there are rarely hot guys in the stands at swim meets, so you never know. and then they would be like what are they doing bc you guys would be so chaotic up there lol. and everyone’s squeezing everyone else’s hand but pretending they’re not. “no we weren’t holding hands, what are you talking about?” and you’re just absolutely destroying quinner’s hand, so you have to make it up later 😏 and then dyl is just hiding his face in his hoodie, which make sure you wear a shirt under your hoodie ik i never do lol, but you’ll want one bc it is hot af at swim meets. like when you’re wet you feel cold, but in the stands it’s soooo hot. anyways dyl’s face is in your hoodie and he just asks how i’m doing every 5 seconds. “dyl just look yourself, i can’t tell it’s too close” and then he refuses to look so you chirp him lmao. but it’s ok bc then after i win we all have our epic trample hug lol. i love how it’s turned from a hug into just a huge trample lmao

haha you and ryan preparing chirps the entire time i’m swimming and just saving them til after lmao. but it’s ok bc i’m just chilling with jamie and dyl who were surprisingly really good at keeping me distracted and getting me all of the food i need. yes try squeezy applesauce, i literally love it sm, like i have a strange addiction to it but it’s fine. oh yeahhh clif bars do take a really long time to eat, i kind of forgot about that. personally i’m a weirdo so i hate bananas unless they’re superrrr green. yesss that’s part of our vacay now (i mean we already had going to a store but it’s fine) and then we make the guys push us around in the carts lol. we’ll def lose them at some point, but yk what it’s fine we’ll find them eventually

haha it’s ok i can still sit with you guys, i’ll just be wearing a usa jersey. probably my 1980 o’callahan jersey i got for christmas bc i love it sm. yes please take me to get food lol

hehe yes everyone is confused why you’re crying and you’re just like i’m fine my friends are just here. yes ofc we’ll distract you from your warmups. oof that whole driving test experience sounds awful. anywayssss yes i could def see you making eye contact with us between points and just start laughing and whoever you’re playing is so confused. hehe and then you hit ryan with the ball and he’s mad at me bc i just start laughing, but then he gets over it and decides to go after you lol. meanwhile, jamie’s just like wtf do i do? and he’s trying to get me to drink water lol. and then ofc you give quinner a kiss. but just be warned if you’re not winning or it’s close and i’m stressed about the match i will start screaming at you lol

oooh yes coachella is gonna be so fun. hehe dyl getting handsy 😏 sorry jamie, i love you too bb, but you got to let me and dyl have our moment. and i’ll just be playing with dyl’s hair while we’re watching 🥰 meanwhile, you’ve taken up braden’s offer but then quinner’s jealous so you feel bad lol. so then we take turns on each other’s shoulders. and then kesh is just chilling on kirby’s shoulders oblivious to all the guys getting jealous lmao. but then later we’re just chilling standing there and then jamie comes up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist and puts his head on my shoulder 🥺 and just swaying together to the music. that’s the softest shit. and kissing under the fireworks 😍 the literal dream. anyways yeah the only makeup i ever ever wear is mascara, but that’s hardly ever, but our outfits would be so cute. and we could do matching dutch braids! omg yes the guys would look so hot, but we have to bring sunscreen for our white boys. and yess water bc i’m always dehydrated

ily too ��

#ask answered #anon answered #skating anon

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godidfk · 4 years

Text

I Don’t Need A Hero (Part Two)

Summary: You don’t like heroes. They were a sham. But when your quirk disappears you are shocked to find you need them more than you thought. One in particular more than others.

Pairing: Eijirou Kirishima x Reader

Warnings: Angst but like? Not really?

Word Count: ~ 3.3K

A/N: okay listen im sorry this took seven years to come out lol. Life is life. I know there’s some confusion on what the readers quirk is but like I promise there will be a more in depth explanation soon. My asks are always open if you have questions!! I hope y’all like this.

I’m gonna tag everyone who asked for part two on the last post! Just in case y’all forgot <3 (if that’s not okay lemme know I’ll untag you)

@lady-bakuhoe @shania-chua @raekah @onegaisobaniite @red-riot-girl642

Part One

“So what happened with Chargebolt?” Once you were both back to your car, you finally felt comfortable enough to ask Molly about what had happened at the meet and greet.

“Oh y/n! Oh, it was absolutely amazing! I kept peeking around the girl in front of me when I got up close, and he totally caught me looking. I was so embarrassed, he just kind of stared at me and I felt like I was on fire. He smiled at me and then he winked and I felt like I would pass out on the spot.” Glancing over, you saw Molly was absolutely glowing. Her hands were flying everywhere to emphasize how excited she was. You chuckled looking at her. “That’s not even the best part though y/n! When I finally got my turn to go up to him, he asked my name and told me I was really cute and asked if I’d stay after so I could talk to him more!” Your jaw dropped as Molly went on. You knew your best friend was drop-dead gorgeous, and the best person in the world. But who would’ve ever guessed her all-time favorite pro would be immediately taken with her?

“Molly! That’s amazing! But... it didn’t take you long to come out and find me after..” realizing what your friend must’ve done you felt a wave of shame and guilt wash over you. “Molly please tell me you waited for him. Please don’t say you left to come find me instead.” The guilty look she threw you made your stomach sink.

“It’s not like that y/n. I did wait. I figured since I sent Red Riot after you that you’d be alright waiting a little longer. I knew you’d kill me if I didn’t wait for him. So I did! But I definitely left quicker than he would’ve liked… BUT guess what!” Before you could get a word out she interrupted you. “Kaminari and I are getting together tomorrow after his patrol! As long as you’re alright that is.” She looked over at you and you could briefly see that worry back there.

“Kaminari huh? Looks like you two got close real fast. I told you he’d love you! And Molly… I’ll be okay. It’s just going to take some time right?” That’s what you were hoping. That your quirk would be back in the morning. Or that you’d figure out what had happened.

“Y/n, you never told me exactly what happened back there. Why can’t you hear anything anymore?”

“It was weird Mol. You know how I hate being deep in the city like that. Around so many people. Their thoughts were so loud. It was starting to become too much. I pushed through though. For a bit. I was determined to be with you when you met him. Although it turns out you didn’t really need my help did you?” Throwing a quick glance over your shoulder you saw her blush. “Anyway, when we got into that line and Chargebolt came out it got so loud. I was about to excuse myself for a moment when… I don’t know. Everything was too much and then I saw him looking at me and all of a sudden… nothing. I totally freaked Mol. The silence was so loud. I felt like I was drowning in it. So I went outside. And then that stupid hero tried to come to my rescue. Who does he think he is anyway? He doesn’t know me. What could he possibly do to help?”

“Wait back up, are you telling me when you looked at Red Riot it all went silent?” Molly was staring at you with her eyebrow quirked.

“Yes. That is exactly what I’m telling you. What’s your point?”

“Well, that seems… sort of like something you would read in a romance novel doesn’t it? Young pretty girl looks at hot young man and all the voices in her head go silent? Sounds kind of dreamy to me.” Glancing over at her, you noticed she was wiggling her eyebrows at you.

“Molly this is serious! My quirk is straight-up gone and all you can think about is some dumb fantasy? Even if it was some weird ‘hey this guy is your soulmate’ kind of thing you know me better than that. Never a hero. Never. But that’s beside the point! Molly, it’s gone and I can’t hear what anybody is thinking now. As nice as it is to get some peace for once in my life my spatial awareness is so fucked up. Normally I can tell when people are close to me without seeing them. Some asshole back there slammed into me and knocked me down and I didn’t even know he was there until I was on the ground. I have no idea what’s wrong with me and I’m scared, Molly.” She had gone silent beside you. The drive back to your house felt like it was taking years instead of an hour.

“I’m sorry y/n. You’re right. I should be taking this seriously. We’ll figure this out. Do you want to go see a doctor? Maybe they’ll be able to find something wrong?”

“Molly if I went to a doctor I’d be a guinea pig. Have you ever heard of someone’s quirk disappearing? Because I haven’t. I’ll figure this out. I’ll be okay. I couldn’t control my quirk very well anyway, right? Who needs it.” But the truth was you were terrified. You felt wrong. Empty. The quiet was so loud.

-----------------------------------------------------

It had been a week since then. As much as you were hoping your quirk would be there when you woke up. It wasn’t. Everything was still quiet. If you were being honest though, after the first few days of being absolutely terrified and feeling helpless and empty, you were starting to enjoy the quiet. It was nice to hear the birds all of the time instead of only when you were 100% alone. Getting used to having to pay attention to your surroundings had been a challenge. And your job performance was taking a severe hit. Having to wait for people to actually tell you their order before you could start making it made things take a bit longer than you’d like. You were about to start getting ready for work when your phone rang. Walking over to pick it up from the counter you saw Molly’s contact picture and answered.

“Y/n! Are you busy right now?”

“Actually yeah. I was just about to get ready for my shift at the cafe, why?”

“Oh dangit. Kaminari is coming over today and I was hoping you would come meet him.” Molly had been talking to the pro hero every day since meeting him. She practically saw him every day too. You knew it was only a matter of time before she wanted to introduce you two. You were thankful to have work as an excuse to put it off. As much as you loved her, you weren’t ready to try and befriend a pro hero.

“I’m sorry Mol. We’ll meet eventually I’m sure. I have to go get ready now but have fun! Don’t get zapped.” You heard her start laughing as you hung up.

----------------------------------------------------

A few hours into your shift things started to slow down. You relished the time when the cafe was empty. It gave you a chance to catch up but also admire the view outside. The little cafe you worked at was on the outskirts of the city. Right across from a nature park that was empty more often than not. You loved to look out at the trees and flowers when you got the chance. It’s where you spent your lunch breaks too. Which you decided to do right now. Telling your coworker to man the front, you grabbed your lunch and crossed the street. Laying under your favorite tree you decided to try and figure out what had made your quirk disappear. This had become a daily thing. Taking about 30 minutes to try and piece it together and then pretending it didn’t exist the rest of the time. It had become the best way for you to manage it. Unfortunately, you weren’t any closer to an answer as you were when it happened. You were running out of theories.

Thirty minutes passed by and you slammed shut your notebook and headed back to the cafe frustrated. You didn’t particularly notice the customers who were in the shop as you went into the back and put your things away.

“Hey! I’m back from lunch if you want to go take your break!” Your coworker was smiling at you just a little too widely for your liking and you cursed your quirk for disappearing. “Why are you looking at me like that? Is there something on my face?”

“No there’s nothing on your face. You didn’t tell me you knew Red Riot!” You felt heat rush to your cheeks. How did your coworker even know you had met Red Riot?

“What are you even talking about? I met him last week and promptly told him to leave me alone. I don’t really consider that knowing someone. How did you even know about that?”

“Well if that’s the case, it looks like someone doesn’t know how to listen. I’m gonna go on my break but I expect all the details when I get back!” She wiggled her eyebrows at you as she pushed past you into the back room. Why did what she said make your stomach do a flip? Peeking around the corner into the shop you caught a glimpse of someone sitting right at the counter. He was drinking coffee and looking at his phone, occasionally looking around. His red hair was spiked up the same way it had been when you had met. But he wasn’t wearing his hero costume. Just a normal t-shirt. He looked surprisingly more human this way. Why the hell was her here though? No pros came to this shop. Favoring the fancier shops in the city. You weren’t complaining about that though. You preferred the quiet nature of this place. Taking a deep breath you walked out to the counter. He looked up as you walked out and his face lit up. His smile was bright. It reminded you of the sun. Shaking your head you tried to rid your mind of any thoughts about him other than what he was doing here.

“So what, pro heroes are stalkers now?” You cringed internally at how rash that had sounded. He may be a hero but he didn’t deserve immediate cruelty. His smile dropped off his face for a moment before turning into a smaller smirk.

“Denki told me the coffee here was really good, and that you made it the best. So here I am.” His smile grew a little wider as he spoke. You noticed his teeth were pointed and looked razor-sharp. Like a shark.

“Well, that’s amusing considering I’ve never met him and he most certainly hasn’t been here while I was working.” He furrowed his eyebrows at that. Before he could think too much on it you had a realization and interrupted him.

“How did he tell you? Was it in person?” He looked up at you, clearly confused.

“No, he texted me an hour ago, why?”

“Molly… that asshole. She’s been with him all day. I’d be willing to bet it was her not him. She isn’t particularly happy with me for the way I treated you last week.” You looked at him apologetically.

“Well, that’s okay. You were obviously going through something. Even if it wasn’t Denki, the coffee here is definitely worth it. Why isn’t this place more popular?” You chuckled at that.

“You think that coffee is good? Molly wasn’t lying. We do it pretty well here, but I make it best. What’s your order, I’ll make you another.” He smiled at you and told you his order. You quickly went about making it. Catching him smiling as he watched you from the other side of the counter. You were going to kill Molly later. But for the moment you completely forgot he was a hero. Just enjoying that bright smile. You placed his coffee in front of him and watched as he tipped it back. He closed his eyes for a moment before he spoke.

“That is on a whole different level than the one the other girl gave me. How did you do that?” He was staring at you with wide eyes. You laughed at the face he was making.

“I guess I’m just that good. I’ve been doing this for a while, you tend to pick up on little things after time.” You smiled as he took another, longer drink. He looked happy. He looked up at you and caught you smiling.

“That looks good on you you know. You have a really nice smile. I’m glad I finally got to see it.” Heat rushed to your cheeks as he looked to you. Thankfully at that moment a customer came in and walked up to the counter. You cleared your throat and internally begged your face to cool down.

“Hi! What can I get for you?” You recognized the customer, but you didn’t remember his name.

“You have to ask? Thought you had everyone’s orders memorized by now. You usually start on it right as I walk in. Are you alright?” You felt guilty for having to lie to him. He wasn’t the first customer to ask though. So you automatically launched into the story you had made up to tell them all.

“I’m sorry! I was in an accident last week and I’ve been having some memory issues ever since. I’m sure I’ll get back into it quickly! Just have to relearn everyone’s order.” You saw Red Riot look up at you and furrow his brow when you said that. You silently prayed he wouldn’t ask you about it.

“I’m sorry! I’m sure you’ll get back into it in a jiffy. You’re everyone’s favorite barista for a reason!” Your heart warmed a little at the praise. You gave a small smile to the customer.

“So what can I get for you? And this is super embarrassing after all of that praise, but I’m afraid the memory loss may have also caused me to forget your name.” The customer quirked an eyebrow at that. You had never really had to remember anything about your customers. Whenever they came in they were always thinking about their orders, so you heard them fresh every day. You had always heard their names before they said them too. Why would you take the time to remember it when the information was always immediately available to you? You missed this aspect of your quirk. Not being able to hear what everyone was thinking all of the time had its downfalls.

“The name is Everett. I’ll have a double espresso please.” You immediately started making his drink as quickly as possible, hoping to make up for your lack of quirk. Behind you, you heard a very audible gasp.

“Are you Red Riot? The pro hero?” Hearing the redhead chuckle you felt your heart drop. You had let yourself forget for a moment that he was a hero. All of the nice things he had said to you began to feel like a dagger in your chest. You would never allow yourself to befriend a hero. Finishing Everetts drink you turned and went to hand it to him and saw he was now deep in conversation with the pro. You weren’t listening to the conversation. You didn’t care to hear about the nonsense heroes and their fans talk about.

“Here you go Everett. Hope it makes up for all of my issues.” You smiled at him and went to turn around to clean the counter when you heard him say your name.

“Doesn’t y/n make the best coffee? I’m not surprised that a pro finally made their way to this place. It’s amazing it has stayed as quiet as it has this long.” Red Riot smiled and looked up at you.

“The coffee is absolutely amazing. It’s like a dream. I have a feeling I’ll be here pretty often.” Your heart sank even further and you frowned. Turning to clean up your station, determined not to turn back around unless you absolutely had to. You heard the bell at the door and glanced over to see Everett leaving.

“What happened to you last week?” You closed your eyes and sighed.

“That’s none of your business Red Riot.” You said it harshly. More harshly than you meant to. But you were hurt. Why would the world bless a hero with a smile as bright as that?

“Please call me Kirishima. Everyone else calls me by my hero name. It’d be nice if you didn’t. And look I know last week is obviously a sensitive subject, but if it was bad enough that you’re having memory issues you should’ve let me help you. What if I could’ve prevented it?” Your entire body immediately felt like it had been lit on fire as the anger flooded your veins. You turned and gave him a look that could kill. A look filled with cold, seething rage.

“I do not need some hero to help me. My life is none of your business. Leave.” He looked taken aback by your words.

“Why do you say it like that? Like it’s a bad thing? It’s okay to need help y/n. Everyone does.” You hated the way that your heart melted when he said your name. But much bigger than that you hated that he was a hero. You hated every word he said. You felt your body getting hotter when you heard the bell ring and heard Molly’s laughter coming in. She looked at you and it immediately halted. She ran behind the counter and looked from you to Red Riot. She pushed her way in front of you and grabbed your face.

“Y/n. Y/n go home. Now. I’ve got the counter. Go.” Looking at her, she seemed to be the only real thing for a moment. Her words sank into your mind and you turned and left the shop without a word.

----------------------------------------

Molly sighed as she watched you walk out. Thanking God she had convinced Denki to come to the shop. He was standing by the door still looking incredibly confused. Kirishima was staring out the door too.

“I should have known better than to tell you to come here Kirishima. I’m sorry.” Molly put her head in her hands. Denki walked up to the counter quickly.

“You alright babe? What the hell just happened? She looked ready to kill someone. What did you say to piss her off Kiri?” Denki was looking from Molly to Kirishima.

“I didn’t really say anything. She told a customer she was in an accident last week and that she was having memory problems. When he left I asked why she wouldn’t let me help her last week. And she just. She got so mad.” Kirishima looked back at the door. Molly sighed again.

“Listen. It’s not my story to tell. Short and simple of it, y/n doesn’t like heroes. She hates the whole premise of you guys. Something major happened at the event. Don’t ask me about it. It’s really not up to me to tell you. I’ve only seen her with that look one time before though… I’m just glad I got here when I did.” Molly had flashbacks to that night. Seeing your face then, seeing it now. It was too close. Way too close. Denki cleared his throat.

“Do you even know how to make coffee?” Molly looked up at him confused. Realization set in and she laughed.

“Denki I started here at the same time y/n did. We bought this place together. Even if it is just hers now. I’ve got the counter handled.” Both men looked up at you.

“Wait you guys own this shop?” Kirishima looked around the place again as she continued to laugh.

“It was always y/n’s dream to own her own cafe. Let’s just say dear old dad would do anything to keep me quiet about certain things. So I got her this place! It’s a long story. But when your dad’s a rich asshole there’s really only one benefit.” Denki raised an eyebrow at her.

“Babe you’re so hot.”

“Oh my god, Denki. Not here.” Molly was laughing again. But she saw the way Kirishima was looking down at his cup. She pitied him. If only he hadn’t been a hero.

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