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rxttingsblog · 2 years

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ೃ⁀➷ Notes ೃ⁀➷

Summary: Reader is a mute and reserved test subject at Hawkins Lab. No one knew what her voice sounded like. She only communicated by using a notebook and always came off as “emotionless” but one night, someone catches her sobbing in her room alone because of a disastrous incident that occurred. Will anyone be there to comfort her?

—Peter Ballard/Henry creel x fem!crybaby!mute!Reader

(Reader is 18+ obviously)

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Warning: age-gap, yandere!peter, mentions of m*rder, abuse, angst, pure fluff tbh, dark themes inside Hawkins lab.

•••

It’s not that you were stubborn, you just couldn’t speak. You refused to socialize with anyone else around you. Even with the other test subjects who were kindhearted towards you. Not a single word escaped your mouth. There were only some occasions where you debated on interacting but at the end of the day you still remained as quiet as a mouse.

This obviously took a toll on your life. Papa said you had to communicate. He said you wouldn’t make it anywhere in life if you just stayed mute for your entire life but you never gave a shit. Why did life matter? You were going to be stuck in this prison forever anyway, so it never mattered to you in the first place. But because of Brenner’s toxic behavior you had to communicate in some way. That’s when you decided to communicate through a notebook. Papa was never too keen on the idea but at least you were “opening up.”

But despite having the notebook, you barely put it to use. You still never socialized with any human being. Sometimes you used the notebook, sometimes not at all. No one even cared to talk to you anyway. You couldn’t name anyone who cared at the top of your head. So that’s why you had barely put the notebook to use.

However, there was only one. This one certain person who actually did talk to you. A person who took a liking towards you. Someone who found you to be rather intriguing. It shocked you to your core because you’ve never experienced this much kindness before. Sure, maybe some of the other test subjects were nice but it would always end up with them thinking you’re weird at the end of the day. This caused you to develop trust issues. You even were hesitant about trusting the young man who talked to you almost everyday.

His name was Peter, or Mr. Ballard. The other patients referred to him as Mr. Ballard. He was the only one who didn’t think you were weird. At first you were shy around him since you weren’t expecting an orderly to socialize with you but later on you opened up which he was very glad about. But even he didn’t even hear your voice and you weren’t planning on revealing it to him anytime soon. You weren’t sure why he was so interested in you. Was it because you were different? He always told you that you were different but he reminds you that it was in a good way. It confused you to no end.

But even though you didn’t trust him that much due to your mental health. You still had great respect for him. You could even say that the two of you were friends. It was still awkward because you never understood the meaning of friendship nor how it worked. While others talked and laughed with each other you only talked to your one friend by writing the conversation out. When you wrote, Peter responded verbally. But he never made fun of you, maybe he secretly liked that you were never loud and obnoxious like some of the other patients here.

Peter seemed to be quite hostile towards everyone else besides you. He was always there to give you a hand. If he ever witnessed you getting bullied, he would protect you and turn in the bullies to his boss. Papa would usually handle them accordingly since bullying was permitted in the laboratory. But even after all of that, you’d remain as emotionless as can be. It even surprised Peter.

He never met someone who was so void of emotion. Until that one night that changed everything..

—

“So even after all of this you still remain silent?” Taunted Papa, he loomed over your collapsed body that lied on the cold tiled floor.

The day was going by smoothly before Papa called you in. At first you assumed that the two of you were going to have a private lesson not a lesson where he tortured you. Papa explained to you that this was a punishment for being non-verbal.

Visible scars, burns, scabs, and even bruises were engraved into your once soft skin. You weren’t even expecting this to happen. All of this madness just because you had trouble speaking. You were fighting back the urge to cry. But only Papa could tell you were about to break. A smug smile spread across his crusted lips.

“Still nothing, hm?” Brenner chastised with his grin growing wider. His smile made you want to punch him in that moment.

Your body remained motionless on the ground. All you could do was stare up at him with intense fear that kept increasing. Papa was a very cruel and ruthless man. This was his dark side.

Only you had seen this side of him and it’s not like anyone would believe you if you were to expose him. Expose the things he has put you through. He made you crave the sweet embrace of death. You remember you’d always ask the same questions in your head; “Why does this have to happen to me? Did i deserve this?”

“Alex, please escort 004 back to her room.” Ordered Papa.

The orderly nodded and approached you. He commanded for you to get up but you were far too weak to even stand on your own. Alex scoffed in annoyance before aggressively pulling you up by your wrist. You tried not to yelp out in pain.

Alex escorted you back to your room. It was common for patients and orderlies to walk hand in hand. Papa said it was one of the main rules. You thought it was childish and you always resented it. But rules are rules despite how stupid they can be. The pain on your feet increased the more you walked. Alex practically dragged you since your feeble walking pace aggravated him.

After a few agonizing seconds, you made it back to your room in one piece. Alex locked the door behind you. Then again, it was common for that as well. The subjects had zero freedom and always kept the doors locked during the night. The orderlies on night shift would usually do checks in the room. In order to make sure no one escaped and that no one was awake. The rules here were always very uptight. That was another thing that annoyed you to no end.

When you could no longer hear Alex’s foot steps. That’s when you broke down into a crying fit. You had the tendency to sob hysterically when you were extremely upset. You were a master at faking your emotions so getting by in the lab without passing a single feeling was going off without a hit. But behind closed doors was when you were your truest self. That’s when you showed emotion.

It was hard not to cry too hard. After all, you couldn’t draw attention. And god forbid if anyone actually heard you. You wouldn’t be surprised if the people here punished you for having literal emotions. If someone were to ever cry here they’d get in trouble. Just another reason you lacked public emotion.

Your soft sobs grew louder so you had to shut yourself up by clasping a hand over your mouth as you lied down in bed. You were doing everything in your power to not strengthen your sadness. But being in this cold room seemed to make everything feel beyond impossible.

So here you were, with your body curled up on the bed, a hand over your mouth in order to subside your sobbing, and racing thoughts that never left your brain. You grabbed the pale covers and pulled them over your head. You feared that one of the mean guards would punish you if they heard you since at this point your crying was becoming louder. It was to a point where you were hyperventilating.

It’s not that you were emotionless, you just acted. In front of other people you pretended to be normal. But not that it helped from the way you were mute and used a damn book to communicate with. Everyone thought you were even stranger.

Who could even want to associate themselves with a screw up like you? A deep part of you inside was wishing someone would comfort you but as always comfort was one of the main things forbidden. To summarize it, love was forbidden. Not that it was a shocker though.

The clock finally hit 9:00 PM. That’s when night shift would be on patrol. Peter was one of the few orderlies who often took that shift. They would all frequently do checks. But this was something you weren’t aware of. You were far too busy crying to even care. Peter was on shift with one of the other orderlies. He had been wanting to talk to you all day before you were ripped away from him by Papa. Peter couldn’t express his anger towards that old hag.

Before you got punished, Peter and you were having a lovely conversation in the rainbow room. He would usually tell you about his kinship towards black widow spiders. You’d always listen to him because something about him was comforting. Especially his voice. Peter knew almost every aspect of you. But catching you crying caught him off guard.

As Peter made his way down the depressing corridor he could make out just the sound of faint crying. Normally, this is something he wouldn’t care about. But the crying came from your room. You were the only person he actually cared about. The both of you shared a deep connection. You weren’t like the others since you were the only one who was actually born with this gift. Unlike the others who were cheap rip-offs of him. Peter’s heart sank at the thought of you crying.

He didn’t want you to be upset. It honestly shocked him to hear you crying though. Usually you were the most reserved person ever. A smile never on your face, your eyes no longer magnetic and now empty. Lacking empathy 24/7. Never enthusiastic or interested in anything at all. You were also very insecure which is something he never understood. Peter always thought you were gorgeously exotic.

Peter knew the risk he was about to take, he knew he would get in trouble (lots of trouble) for this but he didn’t give a damn anymore. It honestly wouldn’t matter in the future anyway because he was going to kill everyone in this lab. As soon as he did, that’s when you two would finally escape together. Peter would provide you with the love you deserved. He only liked being your caretaker not anyone else’s. He only wanted you to talk to him and him alone.

“(Y/n), may you please let me in?” Peter asked after knocking on your door.

Your heart suddenly dropped, he knew you had been crying. You felt bad for not letting him in but why should you? All the orderlies torture you so what if he was like them? You wouldn’t even be surprised. Whenever something good happened something bad always lurked around the corner.

When you didn’t answer, Peter took it upon himself to let himself in by force. So he pulled out his key card to open the door. All orderlies had access to the patients rooms. They could let themselves in whenever they pleased. Giving you yet another reason to be afraid.

When you heard the door swing open you remained hidden under the covers. But Peter was no fool. He was able to make out the outline of your figure that was hidden under the blanket. He let out a brief sigh but it wasn’t one of those sighs out of annoyance. As he approached you, your heart pounded out your chest. The rising fear that he was going to harm you like everyone else in this hellhole. You wished you weren’t so scared.

Peter sat on the edge of your bed right next to your hidden body. Without trying to startle you he pulled the blanket off your head but as if on command, you subconsciously jumped and snatched the blanket from out his grasp. Peter held his hands up in surrender and indicated that he meant no harm. He only wanted to know what was wrong with you. He did truly care, no lying intended.

“Hey, hey, sweetness. I’m not going to hurt you..” Peter gently reassured, with another attempt to remove the blanket that was over your head.

His heart sank when he saw your tears, your glossy eyes, and puffy pink lips. Peter frowned at the sight of it. You pulled your gaze away from him and faced the other side of the wall. You felt humiliated. You kept the other part of the blanket over your body. Not wanting to show your fresh injuries. He’d most likely interrogate you if he saw them.

“Do you mind telling me what’s wrong? I promise it’ll only stay between the two of us.” The orderly soothed, while gently running his slender fingers through your hair. He then cupped his hand under your chin so that you’d meet his gaze. His fingers brushed off your tears the more they cascaded down your face.

Peter probably wouldn’t believe you but it didn’t hurt to try. With the blanket still wrapped around you, you hastily reached for your notebook and pencil and began to write. Peter watched you closely while you were in the process of writing.

“Papa hurt me because i’m always so quiet.” Is what you had wrote down. Peter analyzed it closely, understanding every word. The anger he felt couldn’t even be described. If he didn’t have that soteria implanted in his neck none of this would be happening. He couldn’t wait to escape with you.

“What did he do to you?” Peter asked next, wanting to know what type of injuries you had. At first you hesitated but at the end went with it. You slipped off the blankets that were over your body and showed him your injuries. His icy gaze went wide while looking at this.

You felt more tears welling up in your eyes as it ached to fight them back. For some reason when someone comforted you it made you cry even more. You let out small sobs as you begun to cry again but Peter was quick to react.

“Hey.. come here, doll.” Peter gave his lap two firm pats. Beckoning for you come over. You gave into your instincts and crawled into his lap. Your arms draped around his torso while his hands snaked around your waist to pull you all the way up into his lap. You sobbed into his chest as he whispered nothing but sweet praises into your ear. An attempt to calm you down.

“Shhh, it’s okay, it’s okay. I’m here now. You’re doing so good for me, darling. I promise we’ll get out of here one day. Just the two of us.” He continued to soothe you. Peter removed one hand from your waist so that he could gently caress your hair. His shirt felt so soft against your face, your tears did leave a damp spot on his white uniform though. Hopefully he doesn’t kill you for that. You then felt Peter place a long kiss on top of your head. Your body shuddered in response.

You wondered what this feeling was. Something about the way Peter comforted you didn’t feel like it was in a friendly way. More of a romantic way?But love was a word you never fully understood. All you knew is that it ended in heartbreak.

You remember Peter once explained to you how Papa was overly strict with him too. This led you to overthink. He was risking his life for you and you hated it. Peter shouldn’t risk this for you. The amount of guilt you’d feel afterwards if you ever got him in trouble. Without warning, you squirmed away from his embrace. Peter furrowed an eyebrow at you, he didn’t like that you pulled away from him.

“Honey, what was that for? Why’d you pull away?” He inquired, worry residing his raspy voice. His conflicted gaze fixated on you.

You just shook yourself and wrote something inside your notebook again. The only thing that could be heard was the ongoing scribbling from your dull pencil.

“Why are you doing this? You’ll get in trouble. I’m not worth your time. I don’t want you in trouble.” The paper read, Peter examined it once more and only hummed in response. A hum that told you he disagreed with your statement.

“Oh, sweetheart.. you do know i’m already well aware of that? I know what i’m risking. I’m choosing to do it. I don’t care what happens to me.” Peter stated matter of factly. You only shook your head, you still felt guilty.

Peter only chuckled in response and shuffled his body closer to yours, “Now how about you let me hold you? What type of caretaker would that make me if i left you alone in a state like this?”

To be blunt, you wanted him to comfort you. Actually no, you needed it. But you still didn’t want him to get in trouble.

Now your stubbornness was coming out, you huffed in response and plopped back down onto the bed. Curling up into a ball. Peter only rolled his eyes and crawled into bed next to you. He lied next to you and looked deeply into your eyes.

“Why are you being so stubborn, hm?” He asked with a little hum. You felt so small under his intense staring. He tucked a stand of hair behind your ear.

Peter knew how hard communication was for you. But that didn’t matter because it’s like he could read your thoughts out loud. You and Peter were the complete opposite in a way. He’s stronger, more clever and persistent. While you were vulnerable and could crack at any given second.

You just felt like crying again, you did anything in your power to avoid direct eye contact with him. Peter didn’t like that so much. He wanted to make sure he had your full attention.

“Look at me,” Peter suddenly demanded, but his voice remained soft. He could never be upset with you. He did however want your attention.

He got your attention by guiding your face back to his so that you could look right into his eyes. Peter stared longingly into your e/c eyes. Like he was staring right into your very soul. His soft hand stroked your delicate face. Peter was very handsome, it was dark in your room but you were still able to make out his sharp jawline, his soft golden locks, and ocean blue eyes.

“You’re so beautiful..” Peter complimented, your face flushed at his words. You wondered if he could feel your face heating up. The power he had over you was unreal.

Without warning, Peter wrapped his large arms around you and pulled you into his chest. His fingers ventured up so that he could play with your hair once more. As you rested against his chest you could hear his steady heartbeat. The caressing of your hair slowly subsiding your sniffling and lulling you to sleep.

For the first time in your life, you felt safe, at ease, no papa, no more bullying. Peter was your home. You took great solace while being in his embrace. If only this night could last forever. You knew for a fact he would be gone in the morning and it filled you with unwanted dread. But work must come first. Oh how you just despised the cycle of life.

“I promise i won’t let anyone hurt you ever again.” Was the last thing Peter whispered in your ear before you finally drifted off to sleep.

It wasn’t a lie that Peter loved you. He’d do anything in his power to protect you. He was going to love you no matter what. Even if you refused to reveal your voice to him. Peter would find out what you sounded like sooner or later. For now he cherished this one spectacular moment of you sleeping peacefully in his arms.

There was no need to worry about pain anymore because this would all be over soon. Peter would make sure of it. And that is a promise he made to you and only you.

(a/n: hi! this is my first time writing on tumblr so please be nice! if y’all have any suggestions or requests i’d love to hear them! i hope you enjoyed this story. i’m sorry if my english is bad btw!)

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cocopowderrr · 2 years

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this was requested by @jiraiyasresearchpencil

requests can be given here

Jealous Vecna x Reader

Synopsis

As he was taking lives of innocent people for his own gain, Vecna came across a sweet natured girl named Y/N, who was helping Nancy and her friends find Vecna himself. After going through her mind and memories, he became fond of her and wanted her beside him, no matter what or how. While doing his usual spying on her, he discovered that a man was flirting with her at her job as a cashier in a superstore. That drives him to the edge and he decides to strike at once.

Warnings

Suggestive content, stalking, kidnapping, blackmailing, violence, abuse, age gap. (reader is 25)

Vecna was in the upside down hanging in the air with the help of his vines in his once called home. He was focused on something, for the past few days, someone had piqued his interests. While stalking Max, one of the people he has cursed, he came across her friends who were really annoying to him. But one of them was different, looking through her memories, and seeing how she thought, he discovered the most innocent and naive thing he has ever seen.

Her name was Y/N, she had a hard life, she was kicked out of her house by her dad when she was 16, and lived in a shelter for two years while working her ass off so she can buy a place. She also had suffered abuse by her father's hands because he was an alcoholic with no self control. Her mother died two years before everything went down in a car accident, so her father resorted to drinking and hurting his only child.

One day, while stalking his precious Y/N, he saw how a man was flirting with her, and she was slightly flirting back, seeing that made his blood boil, he wanted to blow the man's insides up that instant. The man did end up dead in his home a few hours later, freaking Y/N out as she had seen him happy and normal a few hours earlier.

She had no choice and time to think as she was the oldest in her group of friends who were looking for some monster in another dimension. Right now, she was on a boat with Nancy, Robin, Steve, and Eddie who was a wanted man for something he hadn’t done. The kids Max, Lucas and Dustin were in the woods and when they saw the police approach the lake where the adults were, Max decided to distract them so Nancy and the others can keep doing their thing.

Apparently, Dustin had discovered that the reason his compasses weren’t working was because something else was pulling them away from the earth's magnetic field. Due to prior experience, he concluded that it was a portal to the upside down. So now, after Steve discovered it by going underwater, he was about to come back in the boat but something pulled him back underwater. The three girls and Eddie rushed after him and saw him almost get killed by a bunch of bats who had some bites out of Steve's flesh. They were running away from the gate but a bat screamed at Y/N and vines started wrapping around her body. She was freaking out pretty badly, and so were Steve and the others. The vines were cutting her oxygen supply so she begged Nancy and the others to run before they become food to the bats. It was a hard choice but after constant screaming and begging by Y/N, they ran away to the woods. Y/N had lost consciousness due to getting choked, and when she did, the vines had let her go and the bats flew away as well. But slimy and heavy footsteps approached her frail body and took her away.

Y/N woke up in a different place. It seemed familiar, and it was. It was the Creel House's attic, she had been their prior in the real world when she went with everyone else to search for clues about Vecna. She tried moving, but she was tied on to a chair with the same vines that were about to crush her earlier.

“Y/N” She heard a raspy and monstrous voice that made her flinch. She heard footsteps approach her from behind and not long after, the thing showed itself to her, making the poor girl scream from pure fear.

“I finally have you…” She ignored him and kept screaming and moving around in hopes of getting free, but more she moved, the more tighter the vines got. She stopped once it started to hurt. Vecna learned down and grabbed her shoulders tight, casually looking into her beautiful eyes filled with fear. His grip grew tighter and tighter as he thought about her flirting with that man.

“I see you everyday Y/N, I see how you try to get to me, do you think it was that easy?” He slightly tilted his head a”s he waited for an answer. But she shut her eyes tight along with her mouth.

“I saw how you were talking to that man, I didn’t like that….” His tone was a bit more aggressive.

“You’re mine, Y/N.”

“You belong with me.”

“NO!” Y/N screamed,

“Please, what do you want from me?” She cried. He wiped her tears with utmost care and leaned in to her ear.

“I want you. I want you, dear Y/N. I want you to be with me…” He spoke in a low raspy manner right in her ear.

“No, please!”

“Then, your friends will pay the price.” He backed away from her and started to walk away. But she begged him to stop.

“No, no, no, no!! Please! I beg you, please I'll do anything!” She cried to him. He stopped on his tracks and looked at her.

“Be my queen then.”

“Fine! I will, just please don’t hurt anyone!!” Vecna had a sadistic smile on his face as he approached her again. In his mind, he loved Y/N's kindness. But he wasn’t going to listen to her, he just wants his way with her.

“You also deserve a punishment for being a slut…” He did a low chuckle. Y/N was quiet confused but she cried in pain once she was suddenly bit in the neck. His hand went on her thighs and he kept squeezing them as he was biting her.

“P-please!” She had a bad feeling, a really bad one. He removed his big hand from her thigh and placed it on her face, putting her into a dream while he did his job.

“Such a weak dumb girl…” He thought. But before he went on with his work he ripped off her clothes and decided to play with his little doll for a bit.

Meanwhile, Y/N woke up in her room. She was shaken and had no idea what was going on. She looked around and everything was normal, the sun was shining brightly, the birds were singing. She hesitantly got out of bed and looked around her small apartment. Everything was normal.

“Was-was that a nightmare…?” She thought.

“Maybe.” A sweet voice spoke from behind her. She gasped and almost fell on the floor, but the man standing caught her before she did. He was a tall man with beautiful dirty blond hair, and mesmerizing blue eyes. He was a beauty. He was wearing all white clothes. He had a small smile on her face. Y/N was left flustered in his arms.

“Careful, you would’ve fell.” He chuckled. She snapped out of her thoughts and stood again, apologizing for what had happened.

“Who are you?” She asked.

“It doesn’t matter, the only thing that matters is that I finally have you.” His voice was so soothing, she could keep listening to him talk forever.

“Why do you want me…?” Y/N hesitantly asked, she had a weird feeling in her heart, like she had heard those words before.

“Because you’re perfect for me, you’re so beautiful and sweet, Y/N.” She blushed at his words. No one had been so sweet to her for as long as she’s been alive.

“Th-thank you…” She replied in a surprised tone. The man slowly started leaning to her face, Y/N slowly started walking backwards but he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her back.

“Don’t leave me…” He whispered as he examined her flustered face. His lips suddenly joined with hers and slowly, it turned into a heated moment. The man seemed like he could go on forever. He parted and smiled at her while Y/N smiled back, forgetting about everything.

She woke up once again in the same nightmarish room she was in before. She looked around and saw her clothes on the floor. She had bites all over her body, there was also pain under her legs, what happened to her? She slightly opened her legs to see blood. She realized what had happened and she couldn’t believe it. As she was dreaming about something so sweet, Vecna was abusing her. She thought she had found happiness but it was Vecna messing with her. She sobbed helplessly and flinched when two familiar hands were on her shoulder from behind.

“Don’t cry, Y/N. It’s what you deserve for being with someone else other than me.’

“From now on, you’re only going to see what I show you.” She sobbed as Vecna left her alone to end what was started.

“You belong to me.”

THE END

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prttydolls · 2 years

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— peter ballard nsfw alphabet headcannons !

warning(s); nsfw !! i honestly don't know what this is lol

small note; dni if you dont feel comfortable with this type of content, i am not responsible for your media consumption

author note; okay, alphabet format is from this post by @attentiondefislut ! | this is my first time doing this shit bro

A - Alone time (how do they get off when they’re all by themselves? do they watch porn, is it all in their imagination, do they jerk off, do they use toys?)

- peter would secretly jerk off in the mens restroom on breaks whenever hes horny

B - Bondage (do they like it? do they not? do they prefer to be the one being tied or the one doing the tying?)

- he's probably into it, but obviously hes the one who is tying and his partner is the one being tied. lets be honest peter is the dom one here!

C - Crying (is it a turn on? a turn off? do they cry during sex? have they cried during sex? what was the reason?)

- its a turn on, he just loves when his partner cries during sex. especially crybaby!reader !! and probably the reason would be, his partner being punished , or just cant take his dick

D - Dominance (do they prefer to dominate, or be dominated? do they have experience as a Dom? Do they have a Dom that they trust already? What kind of things do they enjoy as/with their Dominant partner?)

- peter is a 80% dom, and 20% sub. probably his partner ( if they live outside the lab ) would have the most experience than peter but as time goes on, peter is now the dom in the relationship

E - Extra info (any other fetishes? feet? leather? role playing? blood? fantasies that they might want to experience not on this list?)

- hear me out... he likes spanking his partner during sex. seeing their ass being all red with his hand mark turns him on

F - Food play (do they like using food in the bedroom? are there any foods they prefer to use during sex or foreplay? any they’d like to try?)

- i see peter as a extremely neat, and like IS SUCH A CLEANING FREAK??? so sadly no.

G - Group sex (would they have a threeway? four? an orgy? do they put on a show for spectators? or do they like to keep it just between them and their partner?)

- peter is a VV private person, and probably you being his only comfort person wouldn't make him share you during sex

H - Humiliation (does degradation and insults get them hot? do they get off on humiliating someone else? what kind of humiliation is good for them?)

- sub!peter, hes definitely into that shit !! whenever he messes up during work you'd tease him during sex like “you had one job, and you can't do that? hm such a shame..” or just him shaking alot from his intense orgasm

- dom!peter, nowww this man is incredibly RUTHLESS. he will, do anything in his power to humiliate you while sex (with permission ofc)

I - Impact play (here’s where talking about things like spanking, paddles, canes, floggers and the like.)

- like i said before, hes into spanking his partner as a punishment it turns him on seeing their ass red, with his hand print on it

J - Jelly (what kind of lube are they using? is it flavored? have they tasted it? do they prefer to use something other than real lube during sex?)

- he probably uses his spit as lube since he cannot go out of the lab ?? unless he somehow gets his hand on one also has he tasted it ? : ehh, no i just dont see it im sorry

K - Kissing (what parts of their body do they like having kissed? what parts of their partner do they enjoy kissing? do they like leaving marks / having marks left on them?)

- he definitely enjoys being kissed by the neck, especially his sweet spot. and for his partner, id feel like lips because hes a very passionate boy <3

L - Lighting (are the lights on? off? do they have some kind of mood lighting set up?)

- depends on his mood tbh

M - Masochism (do they like pain? scratching? biting? being bossed around? spoken down to? choked?)

- sub!peter enjoys being bossed like alot he is a very submissive boy<3

- dom!peter he likes when you scratch his back while really rough sex, even after sex he enjoys seeing the marks you made<3

N - Not yet (orgasm delay? orgasm denial? do they tell their partner not to touch themselves for a certain amount of time or under certain circumstances? do they delay or deny other things like bathroom usage or food? do they need to beg first? do they like being denied / delayed?)

- peter would probably tell his partner not to touch themselves, as a punishment

O - Outdoor sex (have they ever done it in public? would they? where?)

- probably no, he doesn't even go out (when he became vecna is not included lmao) maybe like tried to fuck in the employee lounge while every worker is on break meaning there's a chance one would walk in while both of you are just ramming inside eachother

P - Photography (are cameras allowed in the bedroom? do they send nudes? do they ask for nudes? would they ever record themselves having sex / being caught up in a sexual act?)

- peter would definitely secretly own a small camera, and would take a picture of you being covered in his cum + he'd put it in his wallet;)

Q - Quiet please (what’s the volume like in the bedroom? are they quiet? do they scream? do they like a loud partner? do they prefer if their partner is more soft spoken?)

- hes definitely a loud one, like he starts off with gentle moans until everything gets sloppy and hes just loud as fuckkk

R - Routine (do they have a routine when it comes to picking up one night stands? do they have scheduled sex with their partner? are things spontaneous or planned ahead of time?)

- peter would just pull you in a broom closet or, just have you wherever he pleases when he's horny but obviously first, atleast he should be on break + brenner isn't up his ass

S - Sleepy sex (do they give oral to wake their partner up? do they like receiving oral to wake up? do they like fucking their partner awake? being fucked awake? how about being fucked to sleep at night? do they have lazy morning sex?)

- yes, yes and YES ! peter would wake up early and secretly inserts himself in you while you were slowly waking up<3

T - Top or bottom (self explanatory…)

- again 80% top and 10% bottom

U - Underwear (what kind of underwear do they put on in the morning, if any at all… do they own any sexy underwear or lingerie?)

- hes a plain, but vv hot man. he has no access to any things that are outside the lab, so prolly just boxers

V - Voyeurism (do they like to watch, or are they more hands on? are they more of an exhibitionist?)

- he loves just looking at you , lost in pleasure he definitely get turns on whenever you touch yourself and think of him while doing so.

W - Water (pool sex? bath / shower sex? are they into watersports at all?)

- if hes extremely horny, and eager to fuck you. yes, he's into it. having you pressed on the wall while he rams himself into you while hot steamy water drips onto your bodies just makes him feral

X - X-dressing (do they crossdress as a part of teasing / foreplay? does crossdressing turn them on? turn their partner on? do they prefer to do it or watch their partner crossdress instead? do they use other costumes? cat ears, tails, etc?)

- maybe if he didn't kill all those kids, and escaped with you ; he'd probably try a maid costume on you the whole day. would probably fuck you in it too

Y - Yes, Master (what kinds of names are used during sex? do they like being called master / mistress, daddy, etc…? what names do they call their partner?)

- he DEFINITELY HAS A SIR KINK. sir kink all the way<33

Z - Zones (what are their erogenous zones? what spots on their body should be touched, bitten, kissed, when someone wants to get them in the mood?)

- his sweet spot would make him go wild, it turns him on 100%

taglist : @winter014 @imabee-oralizard @minetticatinwonderland

please reblog :) if u reblog you'd receive a cookie

#Peter ballard x you #peter ballard x reader #peter ballard x y/n #Vecna x you #vecna x reader #vecna x y/n #henry creel x you #henry creel x reader #henry creel x y/n #— {🐚} her work's !#smut alphabet

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littlest-dark-age · 2 years

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🍯: peter ballard | vecna | 001 | henry creel finding out that you have a major handkink (thank you, also i love your work <3)

"Oh? You want my hands all over you? Roaming down your pretty body?" Henry purrs, grinning as he looks down at you.

He leans down, his face a breath away from yours. Close enough you can smell his clean scent start to surround you.

"How precious......and pathetic."

#asks #henry creel x reader #vecna x reader #peter ballard x reader #henry creel x y/n #vecna x y/n #peter ballard x y/n

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puttyduck · 2 years

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why are there so many 001 x readers with a gross ‘little girl’ thing to them Ihateitsomuch

#001 #stranger things #peter ballard #vecna #henry creel #001 x reader #peter ballard x reader #I’d rather babygirl not be a low key predator #tbh #crucify me but it must be said #admin talks #stranger things x reader #x yn #vecna x y/n #vecna x reader

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creelmalfoylaufeyson69 · 2 years

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I wanna write for Vecna

And yes I mean Vecna Vecna, not Henry Creel

Also I really want this to be a judge free zone especially for everyone else who reads the fanfic’s I’ll make

#Dafoeosborn69 #henry creel #vecna x reader #vecna x y/n #no hate here #judge free zone #vecnussy #st vecna #jamie campbell bower

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st4ngrl · 2 years

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001 is fine yall omllll 💗💗💗💗💗

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moonpiett · 2 years

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001/peter/henry fanfic ideas

hey im new to tumbler and thought of writing fan fics since i have come experience with that. Comment some tropes or anything u want me to write a fan fic on. No smut yet

#001 x reader #001 x you #001 stranger things #peter ballard #henry creel x reader #henry creel x you #peter ballard x you #peter ballard x reader #vecna imagine #vecna x y/n #vecna x reader #vecna x you #vecna x yn

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moniquesblogz1 · 2 years

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Is it weird I find vecna a total babe i

I mean imagine him in a bikini-

*has a nose bleed *

If I ever get cursed by him just play cpr by cupcake ☺️😉

Plz come in my room

Credit to xxzealo

#vecna x y/n #vecna #stranger things spoilers #stranger things

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bad-bitch-bisexual · 2 years

Link

Chapter Four has just been posted! Chapter Five (another chapter with Henry Creel actually present, there’s a lot of exposition going on right now) coming soon!

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rxttingsblog · 2 years

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𓆩❤︎𓆪 Pacify him 𓆩❤︎𓆪

( PART 3 )

Yandere!Peter ballard/Henry creel, dark!002 x hurt!Reader

READER IS 18!!

Summary: Peter comforts+takes care of the reader after her abusive boyfriend AKA 002 violated her body. Reader is confused with what just happened between them but with enough convincing she manages to tell Peter what went down in the storage closet. Let’s just say.. Peter isn’t too thrilled about it.

WARNING: Forced/toxic relationship, physical & emotional abuse, love triangle, age-gap, grooming, mentions of murder+non-con touching, pure fluff, dark comfort, dark themes, possessive behavior, manipulation, inside hawkins lab.

(part 2) (part 1)

“You need to let me take care of you” Peter insisted his voice filling with concern for you.

You shifted uncomfortable, trying to find a comfortable position. Peter crouched behind you, shower nozzle in hand as you sat in front of him with your knees pressing against your chest. You did everything in your power to keep your exposed body covered but you failed to cover every inch.

“I can take care of myself..” You try to reply confidently but your voice sounded hoarse with pain as you choked back a broken sob

“If you could then why don’t you leave that filth?” Peter interrogated, in which you groaned in response to his question.

It made you angry, it wasn’t that easy. He had to understand that you couldn’t just simply leave. It went deeper than that and there was way more to it. No one understood that you were trapped. So leaving wouldn’t be an option. Even if you could leave you wouldn’t know how. You didn’t even know how to properly break up with someone. The thought of leaving 002 made your gut wrench in fear. He’d kill you if you left. You weren’t ready to die yet.

Suddenly, you muster up the courage to respond, “It’s complicated..”

“How so?” He hums, while rinsing out your hair, the feeling of the warm gushing water falling through your hair sent your into a state of temporary bliss.

“I can’t just leave? I love him!” You admit, but you knew those words were a lie. You didn’t love him, you USED to love him.. but not anymore. Not after the hell he’s put you through.

Peter only chucked, “We all know that’s a lie.”

You didn’t respond to that, Peter was intelligent so it was useless to try and lie to him. All you could do was sigh in defeat as he washed your hair. While he washed your hair more thoughts ran through your mind.

Why was he doing this for me? Why did he even want to help me? Do i even deserve this?

You couldn’t help but whimper in pain as Peter bathed you. All you wanted to do was scream how much 002 has been hurting you. Expose him for who he truly is as a person. But at the same time you didn’t want to bother anyone with your domestic abuse problems. Others had it worst so why should you even explain your problems?

“It’s okay, love. You’re doing so well.” Peter praised you as he finished up on you. All the dirt from your body and hair disappeared down the drain and now it was time to dry your body off which you could handle while Peter grabbed a fresh gown for you.

When the two of you were finally finished, Peter grabbed your smaller hand and led you down the dark corridor. The two of you didn’t speak a single word to each other until you both were in your room. The consistent awkward silence wasn’t helping. Honestly, it just made you feel more anxious than before.

Peter took a seat at the edge of your bed and you just stood there fiddling with the sides of your hospital gown. Having anxiety really did suck because you never knew what to say without sounding idiotic. Not to mention, all your words came out soft or as a stutter you didn’t have control over.

“Come here,” He beckoned you over with his finger and with that command you slowly walked over to him until you were in between his long legs. This position made your face flush up in embarrassment so you avoided eye contact.

Then again, Peter did not like this. You and him were the opposite. He liked eye contact meanwhile you couldn’t even hold proper eye contact for over 5 seconds. Your eyes always wardered off into space. Literally it happened every single time you and him communicated.

“What happened in there?” Peter questioned, referring to why he stumbled across you, in a ball, crying hysterically in the vacant storage closet that supposedly no one ever went into.

“i-” You paused, not knowing how to elaborate this. To be frank, you had no clue what 002 did to you. All you knew is that he hurt you. Half of you wasn’t in the mood to even tell Peter because it just felt embarrassing. Especially when 002 touched you the way he did. But it wasn’t long until you felt that strong urge again to just break down in front of him.

Peter’s hand instinctively found it’s way to your face. His large hand gently cupped your petite face as he pulled you into his body more. Warmth radiated off him and you wanted nothing more to just rest your head against his chest as he lulled you to sleep but that couldn’t be a possibility. Could it?

“It’s hard to explain..” You grumbled in response as his slender fingers traced your features and that’s when you leaned into his touch. Peter took notice of that and slid his hands down your waist so that he could pull you onto his lap.

“I have the time,” He reassured while tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. Your heart fluttered by his gentle touch.

“Okay,” you take a deep breath

“After i went to the cafeteria.. he and his friends led me to the storage closet. Sometimes 002.. hurts me if i disobey him. He got upset because we were talking i guess so he did something.. i’m not really sure how to explain it?” You admit, sounding embarrassed as ever. Your hands gripped tighter into his white uniform.

Peter frowned as you spoke, he was never capable of liking anything nor feeling sympathetic towards anyone for that matter. But this time, he felt different, a undying need to protect you from this cruel world with made up rules and filthy individuals who walk upon the face of it. He didn’t know why he liked you so much. But out of every human he resented, 002 got on his last nerve. If he didn’t have that stupid chip implanted into his neck none of this would be happening to you.

“Can you tell me what else happened? Just explain it to the best of your ability.” He encouraged with a sincere smile while keeping his hold on your waist as you straddled him.

He noticed the hesitation in your eyes.

“It’s okay, i’ll understand. It’s only us.” He reminded you, while rubbing little circles alongside your hips with his thumb.

“Well, he took me in there and tried to touch me? Which he did.. and his friends watched. They called me such awful things- i don’t even want to think about it.. but he did something to my body? i don’t know what it’s called.. but i believe it was sexual and he wasn’t supposed to do that. He didn’t ask me in the first place..” After you were done explaining that, Peter nodded his head and understood completely from where you were coming from.

Even though on the outside it didn’t look like it. On the inside Peter was fuming with great festering anger he’s never experienced before in his lifetime. You belonged to him, not 002. This rage only grew stronger the more he thought about it. His gut twisted with this uncomfortable feeling. An urge he couldn’t just ignore. He had the strong urge to rip 002 apart limb by limb and make him pay for putting you through all this misery. You were such a precious creature who didn’t deserve this and 002 really had the audacity to take advantage of your kindness and corrupt your innocence?

Peter was infuriated but his heart also sank while you told him all this at the same time. He’s never experienced emotions let alone experiencing sadness, anger, and even jealousy all at the same time. You did not deserve something like this and what 002 did to you was crossing the line. He’s never heard anything so disgusting before.

Peter tried to remain his very best to stay calm for you. You were already traumatized enough and he wasn’t in any way shape or form to cause you even more stress than before. He noticed the way your body glued to his form as you rested against him. You were growing tired and he could tell.

“Here, let’s put you to bed, shall we?” He smiled sweetly before laying you down on your bed. Peter pulled the blankets over your body as soon as you got situated in a comfortable position.

“I’m so sorry that happened to you, honey. But it’s going to be alright. I’m going to find us a way out of here so that me and can be happy together. No more bullying, no more Papa, no more 002. I wont let them hurt you again, do you understand?” Peter’s voice suddenly switched. He still sounded sincere but it’s as if his voice was darker and more deeper than before.

You’ve never heard someone spoke so seriously nor sound so sure of themselves but because you were so tired all you could do was nod your head in response.

You expected him to leave after pulling the covers over you but he didn’t. Instead he crouched down next to the bed, running his longer fingers through your silky hair while humming. He fawned over your resting body, watching your chest rise and fall as you relaxed.

It wasn’t long until you soon felt yourself drifting off to sleep. This new feeling you’ve been only experiencing around Peter felt oddly amazing. Maybe this.. maybe this was love. But how could that be? Peter was your caretaker and you knew Papa would be even more upset if you fell for someone like him. Besides, you were with 002.

As you rested, you thought about 002. You may have been in a relationship with him.. but you did not love him. Well, not anymore at least.

Before you were about to pass out entirely, you no longer felt Peter’s presence amongst you. You didn’t feel him caressing your hair anymore. Your glossy eyes instantly fell upon him sitting up about to leave but you abruptly caught his hand to pull him back down towards you.

“Wait..” You call out before he got up. Your hand practically squeezing his from all this anxiety you’ve been having recently. You didn’t even notice how tight you were holding him. Peter furrowed his eyebrows at you, waiting for you to say what you need to say.

“Thank you.. for everything.” You murmur gratefully, relief flooded over yourself, you would’ve never been able to forgive yourself if you ever let him leave like that without thanking him

Peter stared at you for a second, it was an odd look so it led you to believe that you said something wrong. His gaze made you question yourself, as always.

Did i not thank him fast enough? Oh fuck, what’s wrong with me?!

“I’m sorry, did i say something wrong? I didn’t mean to! i just wanted to thank yo-” Your words were cut off by Peter pulling you into him and pressing his lips against yours.

You’ve kissed 002 before but never like this. This kissing felt different but it felt wonderful. Better than any make out session you and 002 preformed. You kissed him back, but gently. You let his more experienced lips do most of the work.

When he pulled away, you couldn’t help but sit there completely astounded. Your jaw slightly hung open in shock as you processed so many different emotions. Peter only smiled at your flustered state. You couldn’t help but blush at his gestures.

“Goodnight, sweetheart.” He cooed before leaving your room in one swift motion. Leaving you alone with your pounding heart and racing thoughts.

Peter stormed down the eerie corridor with his restless homicidal thoughts consuming his brain. With every step he took he thought of ways to hurt everyone who dared to touch you, everyone who wronged you. He knew you couldn’t do this anymore and neither could he. Peter had to make a plan, a plan that could get the both of you out of here.

And this plan couldn’t fail.

(comment for part 4! reblogs+likes+comments are greatly appreciated<3)

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cocopowderrr · 2 years

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Dad……? HENRY/VECNA/001 FANFICTION

“ i’ve been trying to get to you, join me…..”

previous chapter <3

CHAPTER 7

Watch as I destroy everything

Dustin screamed on top of his lungs as Vivian was getting dragged away. When she was gone, he fell on his knees, crying. His mind went blank, there was literally nothing he could do. Lucas and the others dragged him away from the portal because he was trying to go in so he could save Vivian. Nancy promised him that they'll save her, no matter what. They all went to Max's trailer where Nancy told everyone what she saw. Dustin was out of it, not paying attention to anything. Eddie had never seen his friend like this, Vivian held a special place in his heart. Eddie stood up from his seat and went to Dustin, giving him a pat on his head.

“I swear- if anything happens to her-“

“It won’t.” Steve interrupted. The kids looked at him confused.

“You guys noticed how his bats didn’t even dare to go near her, right??? Vecna clearly doesn’t want to hurt her.”

“The worst he can do is scare her.” Dustin sighed, he wasn’t in the mood to speak.

They all started making a plan on how to defeat him, Dustin proposed ideas as well, and Nancy was also determined to go back, and put an end to everything. Max decided to bait herself to Vecna so he becomes vulnerable and Nancy and the others can put an end to him. They all first decided to go get weapons by stealing someone's van.

Meanwhile, in the upside down, Vecna patiently stood as he waited for his beloved daughter to wake up, she broke her ribs, her arm, and injured her head, but he had the power to heal, so he healed her, but not all the way through. He knew if he did, she'll find a way to escape. He also showed her his memories, what he was up to all those years. And now, luckily for him, Vivian had slowly started gaining consciousness.

“D-dad…” She whispered. Vecna slowly approached her, the footsteps caught her attention, and she opened her eyes to see the thing she wanted to fight, but also run away from. Her eyes widened from fear, was it the end for her.

“I see you’re awake…” She didn’t say a word.

“You don’t have to be afraid of me, I am not going to hurt you….”

“LIAR!” Vivian screamed which made him stop on his tracks.

“You're nothing but a liar, a manipulator, you hurt mom, you killed your own family, you used a child and killed people, you’re an awful person, you're a monster!’

“What do you want from me??? You didn’t kidnap me for nothing!!!” Rage was spewing inside Vecna, He kept that blank expression and approached her. Vivian was scared, but now when she’s in the lair of the devil, she had nothing to lose. When he got close to her, he did a low growl and gritted his teeth. Vivian shut her eyes tight and gulped.

“Why aren’t you saying anything now?” She didn’t reply, what could she have said?

“Answer me!” He suddenly grabbed her throat tight and started choking her, Vivian was tied, she couldn’t get his hand off of her, so she tried using her mind to push him off, but he used his big hand and covered her face, to show her something again. Next thing she saw broke her. She saw Dustin dead, not just him, everyone. She saw Hawkins in flames, there were monsters everywhere, and people were running for their lives.

“NO! ST-STOP IT PLEASE, PLEASE! I BEG YOU!!” Vivian cried, but he tightened his grip more.

“You had left me with no choice…”

“So I had to teach you a lesson.” He let go, she coughed and took deep breaths and cried on top of her lungs.

“You’re different, Vivian…”

“You don’t belong with those people.”

“You belong with me, you belong to me.”

“No!” Vivian whispered, she couldn’t use her voice.

“You have no choice.”

“Now, watch as I destroy everything…”

“Y-you’re a terrible father….”

“I wish I wasn’t born as your daughter.”

“All my life, I had hoped that my father wouldn’t be the same as my mother….”

“But you’re far far worse, she’s your victim, I am your victim.”

“You used me, just as I thought I had someone who loved me…” A tear left her eye.

“Turns out… It was a lie.” Vecna raised his hand once more and put it on her face. Slowly, she started losing consciousness.

“Sleep well, sweet Vivian.”

Vecna had other things to attend to, like the people in Hawkins who are trying to kill him, he put Vivian to sleep so he could take care of them. Her words had no effect on him, he wanted Vivian's powers, and there’s nothing in his way now.

TO BE CONTINUED

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hart269 · 2 years

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*The gang finding photos of 001*

Steve : So that's what Vecna looked like

Y/N : Damn

Robin : What

Y/N : He can possess me any day he wants

Eddie : Me too

#stranger things #stranger things x y/n #stranger things incorrect quotes #stranger things imagine #stranger things x reader #stranger things x you #steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #robin buckley #robin buckley x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #001 x reader #001 stranger things #vecna x reader #vecna stranger things #peter ballard #peter ballard x reader

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bebx · 9 months

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When Art the Clown lights Vecna up

I think it’d be an epic battle if they met, actually

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skyebounded · 2 years

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Tapes For My Lover

.main masterlist. .stranger things masterlist.

premise: You left some tapes for Eddie to have after you’re gone, and now he is finally listening to them…

Warnings: smut, angst, fluff, blood sweat and tears. (tell me if their is more)

WC: 6.8k

A/N: So this idea came to me and I instantly fell in love with it. There is just something about it that leaves me with a feeling of comfort knowing that its Eddie. Anyway, I hope you guys like this one, I sure as hell did.

IMPORTANT: the italics portions are flashbacks. bolded italics are Readers comments, and just plain text is good old Eddie.

(you can listen to the songs, I did, but I also listened to Stargirl Interlude by the weeknd and lana del rey to make it hurt more)

The box had been sitting on his shelf for months now, taunting him, a constant reminder that you were gone, and were never coming back. He couldn’t lie, he had tried to get rid of the box several times, just throw it in the dumpster, and forget everything, even forget you, but he couldn’t. You would never forgive him for it, and he knew that, but that's not why he kept it, no he kept it because it was the last parts of you that he had. The last thing you gave him, and no matter how much it hurt him to gaze at the box every waking moment, he couldn’t bring himself to get rid of it.

He couldn’t stop beating himself up for all of it, your death, the fight. You had died before they had figured out a way to save you, to keep you out of Vecna’s grasp, and it killed him. Killed him to know that he had the ability to do it, he just didn’t know it soon enough, and worst of all he hadn’t forgiven himself for it, for not trying harder to save you. And he wondered if he ever would.

You had left the box lying on his bed, the day you died, no note, no warning, just the box. He refused to open it, fear of what was inside, consuming his very being. A part of him thought that if he did, that If he opened it, he would finally be admitting to himself that you had died and that he would never see you again, and he couldn’t accept that. So he did what he did best, shelved it, and pretended like it didn't haunt him. Walking past it every day, ignoring the sizable amount of guilt that filled him as he did.

Today he couldn’t, not anymore. Eddie walked over to his bookcase, gently pulling the old Vans shoebox off the shelf, as he made his way to the living room. He set it down in the center of the coffee table and stared at it. Wondering if by some chance it would explode and claim him, bringing him to you once again. He closed his eyes, stopping the tears before they had even begun. It was time. Taking a deep breath he pushes back the top, revealing the contents inside.

It wasn’t what he expected, cassette tapes, and on top, your very own walkman. He recognized it immediately, It had always been glued to your hip every waking moment. He couldn’t remember a time when you didn’t have it on, the headphones framing your perfect face. A folded piece of paper sat underneath the walkman that had his name written perfectly on it.

He closes the box, running his hands over his face and through his hair, ignoring the nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach. Getting up and walking to the fridge, grabbing out the first beer he finds, he cracks it open, glaring at the box from the comfort of the kitchen, anxiously tapping his ring against the glass bottle.

Despite thinking that he had the strength, the will to do it, it started to dawn on him that maybe he didn’t. He still wasn’t ready to say goodbye.

After a few hours of pacing, trying to do anything but think of you, he decides to give it another go, making his way back to the cursed spot on the couch, and opening the box once more.

Grabbing the piece of paper with shaky hands, he takes a deep breath, unfolding it to see your neat handwriting. With another deep breath, he begins to read,

Hey Cutie,

I give it about four months before you open this box, maybe even more until you read this letter. So, listen, In this box, there are a few tapes, each one labeled with a date, and I know you’re at least smart enough to put them in order before giving them a listen, however, I have already cued up the first one for you, so you’re welcome. I’m not going to tell you what's on them, that's for you to figure out, but I hope that you do. Anyway, tiger, I’ll let you get to it.

He’s not sure how long he's been staring at the note, memorizing the way your curl your ‘y’ in every sentence, or the way each ‘i’ has a heart over it instead of a dot, but it’s long enough for his legs to get sore, and his eyes to burn. He sets the note down, picking up your walkman and running his fingers over all the stickers, tracing the buttons with his thumb. With another deep breath, he placed the headphones over his ears and pressed play. Closing his eyes and resting his head against the back of the couch. At first, nothing, and then it plays, Everybody Wants to Rule The World. His pulse quickens and he feels like he’s sinking into the couch when he hears your melodic voice over the music.

“Everybody Wants to Rule The Word….didn’t we Eddie? Hey handsome, do you remember this song, I guess I mean more importantly do you remember what the song signifies?” You chuckle, and his heart wrenches at the sound. “September 16th, 1985, the day I met you,” Eddie fights the urge to pull the headphones off and chuck them across the room. “Do you remember that? That day?” Of course, he remembered, how could he not. It was the day he met you, the love of his life. Sitting in a booth at Andy’s Frozen Custard, all alone.

“Andy’s, booth four, 1:35 pm. I had been stood up by Colin Jacobson and was fighting back the urge to cry. I had forgotten my walkman, my only saving grace, and was contemplating on what I did wrong..”

“Nothing, you did nothing wrong,” Eddie mumbles out loud as if you could somehow hear him, and perhaps you could.

“I often thought it was a miracle that I was so desperately waiting for Colin to show because when that bell above the door went off, I probably wouldn’t have looked up, and then who knows if you would have even noticed me.” he scoffs, knowing damn well that he would have seen you, how could he not have, you were the prettiest girl, sitting all alone in a booth, you were an attention grabber. “It’s still crazy to me that you did what you did..” you trail off, humming along to the beat.

Eddie had spotted you, tracing the checkered pattern of the table with your finger. No ice cream in hand, nothing but a sullen look on your face, and he wondered to himself how on earth someone so beautiful could be so sad. When you looked up at him, he could swear his heart skipped several beats, your eyes meeting his and the corners of your lips turning up in a smile before your cheeks turned rosy and you looked away. It would have been a lie to say that he hadn’t tried to get your attention again, doing whatever he could think of to grab your attention just once more. It wasn’t until he nearly tripped over a child running by that he caught your gaze again, and by that time his surprise had been ruined.

“You just slid into my booth, with a strawberry milkshake and two straws, bold of you. You didn’t even have to say anything…God my heart melted. You just handed me the straw and winked.” Eddie can't help but smile, feeling the tears slowly trickling down his cheeks. “Somehow you always knew how to make things better, how to make me feel better…god I wish-” You stop mid-sentence, sniffling trying your best to hide the pain you were in, and yet Eddie knew what you were going to say. You were going to tell him that you wished that he was there with you, by your side as you made these tapes. Holding you close telling you that everything was going to be okay, that you didn’t need to make these at all, because you wouldn’t have a reason to, or at least that's what he hoped you would have said.

Eddie handed you the straw, followed by a wink that sent butterflies erupting throughout you. “Sorry I’m late sweetheart,” he smiled. He doesn’t know what compelled him to say it, but seeing you, sitting here, he felt like he had been saying it to you his whole life. You fight to suppress the smile that inevitably took over your lips.

“It’s okay, handsome.” You had never been so bold, but much like him, it felt right..comfortable. You plucked the straw from his hand, and plopped it straight into the shake, taking a long sip before he could do anything. As if on cue the music changed, and ‘Everybody Wants To Rule The World’ started playing.

“Oh I love this song,” you exclaimed as you being to hum along to it, blissfully unaware of just how hard he was falling for you in that moment. He just sat back, watching the way you found a way to dance in that small booth, with a smile on his face. He never asked you why you were alone, looking so down, and that was perhaps because it changed as soon as he sat down, but to him, all that mattered was that he was able to make you smile. Once you noticed the way he was looking at you, your cheeks flushed, and you hid your face behind a napkin.

“Wow, even hiding behind a napkin, you are still the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.” he chuckles, sliding the milkshake over to his side of the table. Taking a long-drawn-out sip as he waited for you to show your face again, and once you did, he couldn't help the smile.

“I will never understand why you sat down with me, smiling as you’d known me, but I’m glad you did because that was all it took Eddie, your cute smile, the strange way that you knew just what to say, the strawberry shake… just you. You had me immediately, there was no way I could fight it, I was yours...and you didn’t even have to ask.”

The song ends and the tape clicks off. Eddie’s eyes shoot open, overwhelmed, numb, and yet desperate for more. He leans forward, searching through the box, and grabbing out the next tape:

He puts it in the walkman and presses play instantly, waiting to hear your voice once more. Leaning back again, letting his eyes fall closed.

“I see you’ve made it to the next tape, I’m proud of you.” Only You starts to play, and it takes him slightly by surprise, he wasn’t entirely sure what this song correlated to. “I know you are probably wondering what the hell this song has to do with anything, and truth be told I don’t imagine that you would know, considering I only ever listened to it by myself.” you take a deep breath, “September 24th, 1985, a few days after our first encounter. The date better sound familiar to you now, because if it doesn't, we have some problems, Eddie.” You chuckle softly, and it breaks his heart, hearing you imply that if he had forgotten the date, things would end badly for him. Lucky him he remembered it, fondly. “Our first date, which also just so happens to be the first time we kissed too. God, I swear if you forgot…” Your tone held a sense of warning, but he could hear the way you were breaking.

“We’re not supposed to be here Eddie, this is private property!” you teased him as you climbed over the gate, he wasn’t sure at first if you were being serious but seeing you making it to the other side of the fence, smile growing on your lips, he had a growing suspicion that you were just fucking with him. Rolling his eyes, he climbs over the gate after you, nearly losing his footing as he lands. You would have sworn he did it on purpose, just so he could stumble into you and have you catch him. If it was the case, you didn’t mind it, in fact, a part of you preferred that story. Eddie on the other hand was just clumsy. Eddie grabbed your hand, pulling you along with him as you made your way past the security station, climbing over the turnstiles. “Should I be concerned that you are a natural at this?” he asks, gesturing around you. You had never done something like this, at least not on a larger scale. Breaking and entering wasn’t a frequent recurrence of yours. Silently, you just shrug, your brows shooting up and a cheeky grin forming on your lips, the very lips that he hadn’t been able to stop staring at. “I think if anyone should be concerned it's me, this was your idea, and for a first date nonetheless.” You chuckle. “Yeah well I had to go big or go home,” he smiles wildly.

“You probably didn’t know this but that was the first date I had gone on in a while, I mean unless you count the one where I got stood up. Anyway, I was so unbelievably nervous, in fact, my palms were so sweaty I was mortified,”

Eddie smiles, wondering if you knew how nervous he had been because he imagined it was nothing compared to what he was feeling that day. Having to constantly fight the urge to kiss you every time you looked at him, or every time you laughed, or to be honest, after every time you did anything.

Eddie pulled you into full view of the baseball stadium in all its glory, standing at the very back looking down at the desolate field, the whole thing just for you. Heat crept to your cheeks, and your lips did their best to hide the smile. Eyes wide, mesmerized by it all. It wasn’t the fact that it was done up in any way, but more the fact that he had brought you somewhere that you two could claim as your spot, somewhere no one would think to look for you, a perfect spot for you and him. Little did you know it would become just that, your spot. Too entranced by it all to notice that Eddie wasn’t taking in the same view as you, but rather admiring you, your smile, the way your hair frames your face, the way your mouth hung open just slightly drawing attention to your perfect lips. He was gawking at you.

“It's beautiful..” you murmured, “Indeed.” You pull your gaze away to look at him, who instantly pretended, poorly might you add, that he hadn’t been staring at you the entire time.

“The entire night was just..” you pause, “magical.” you sigh.

“No, that's the big dipper,” you argue. Eddie shakes his head dramatically, “Absolutely not, I have never seen someone be so confident in such a wrong answer.” You prop yourself up on your elbow, staring down at him, wondering if somehow you were in fact wrong and had just made a fool out of yourself, only to see that his eyes were closed. “You’re not even looking!” you giggle, playfully slap his chest, leaving your hand to linger there. Eddie, being the eccentric person that he is, grunts, tongue resting out the side of his mouth as if you had just killed him, and you can’t help but laugh. He opens his eyes at hearing the sweet sound of your laughter. His tongue runs across his bottom lip as he grins at you.

“Gahhh, you had me thinking I was dumb,” you remark, eyes narrowing on him. “Oh well we can’t have that I’m afraid, it simply will not do, madam.”

His hand slowly comes to meet yours, resting on his chest. He wraps his hand around your, his thumb grazing the top of it gently. It was taking every fiber in his being not to grab you and kiss you. Perhaps that's what you wanted, but his head was spinning, he couldn’t think straight, and there was no way for him to know for sure. Luckily, you knew exactly what you wanted, him. Without hesitation you lower your face down to him, your lips grazing his, as your eyes fall closed. “Aren’t you going to kiss me?” you ask, your soft lips pressing to the corner of his mouth. His hand comes up and cradles the back of your neck, pulling you down as his lips lock with yours. Gentle, slow, and perfect. There was no denying the butterflies that erupted in your stomach, as his tongue skimmed your bottom lip, begging for entrance, that you would undoubtedly give. Tongues swirling around each other, head spinning, faces flushed, you were in heaven. Eddie pulls away from you, resting his forehead against yours, both of you smiling against each other's lips. Perfect and yet not enough. Eddie draws you back in, his lips catching yours once more but this time with more hunger, more passion. Tilting his head, he adds more pressure, deepening the kiss. As his arm wraps around you, flipping you onto your back, a moan leaves you. Eddie can’t help but smile into the kiss. His hand grips tightly to your hip, and your legs intertwine as he cages you. His tongue meets yours once more, dancing with your own. Needy hands start to roam your body, dipping under the thin fabric of your shirt, hungrily moving up your sides. The rings adorning his fingers, cold against your heated skin as they move further up your body. Your hands come up to tangle in his hair, urging him to continue with it all. You feel his hand hesitate just under your breast, and you encourage him by a tug of his hair, and a nip at his bottom lip.

His hand cups your breast, thumb running over your hardened nipple. Your body shutters at the touch, shivers jutting up your spine. You had never felt so desperate, so needy for someone, but for Eddie, you were both.

“I still can’t believe that I panicked and pushed you off! God, I wanted to go further that night, I know I never told you that, but it’s the truth…I’m sorry..”

Eddie chuckles to himself. To this day he had wondered if he had made the wrong move, touched you too quickly, or grabbed you in the wrong place. He never minded it though, he enjoyed every moment of that night and wouldn’t have changed any of it.

“Anyway, this song was what I played for months after that night.. constantly repeating: Only you and you alone can thrill me like you do, and fill my heart with love for only you:” you sing the lyrics. “Baby, it's you, and it will always be you.”

The tape clicks off and Eddie doesn’t move. He sits in silence too afraid to play the next one. He hates that it's come to this, having to hear your voice in such a way instead of hearing it in person. Hates that he can’t hold you in his arms and just talk, just feel you close to him. The numbness starts to set in as he starts to picture you there with him. Cuddled up against him on the couch, your hand on his chest, like you, always used to do. God, he missed you. Missed every little thing about you.

After a few moments, he moves on to the next tape, pulling it out of the box and putting it in, pressing play instantly.

As soon as the music starts he knows. Groaning at the song that he often claimed he hated, only to tease you, but truth be told he loved it.

“I can't fight this feeling any longer….And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow…What started out as friendship has grown stronger. You can claim all you want Eddie, that you hate this song but I know the truth! This will forever be your favorite song all thanks to me!”

“Never!” he calls out into the empty trailer. No matter what you said, he would never willingly admit the love he had for this song.

“I mean why shouldn’t it be, I only listened to it all the fucking time…I have to admit that I kinda did it to annoy the shit out of you, but I could tell it was getting to you..” you pause, clearly reminiscing about it. “Do you remember that time…” you tone holding a sense of suggestion to it, one that Eddie picked up on immediately.

There was no forgetting it, not when you played the damn song the whole entire day. It would forever be ingrained in his very being.

You had been walking around Eddie’s trailer, your trustee walkman glued to your hip, music far too loud to hear anything other than the same song on repeat. Each lyric fell from your lips as you danced around in his room. Eddie had been on the couch, studying for a test in Miss. O’Donnell’s. He had already shut you out for the hour, dead set on acing the test, well more like barely passing. He insisted you not bug him any further. He wouldn’t admit it, but you knew that the constant repetition of that song had him in a sore mood, so you had decided to give him a little bit of space, but not for long. Noticing Eddie’s hellfire club shirt resting on his dresser, you grab it, replacing your own clothes with the shirt. It rested nicely against your bare thighs, a sentiment you wondered if he’d enjoy.

Wandering out of his room, you spot him, hard at work. Your lips press into a thin line as you suppress your grin, an idea forming, one sure to rile him up. You start your song over, blasting it at full volume, as you begin to sing the lyrics. You watch his eyes fall closed, heaving a heavy sigh, as he looks up at you. The look of annoyance quickly fades to be one of surprise, and intrigue, one that he tries to hide. Except there was no way to hide the growing evidence in the confines of his jeans, luckily you couldn’t see it.

“I can't fight this feeling any longer….And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow…What started out as friendship has grown stronger….” You begin to sing, very pitchy and very off-key. It was enough to drive Eddie insane. He fights the urge to pay you any attention, as he turns back to his textbook. You laugh to yourself at the sight of his eyes wide, and his lips in a downturn. As you get closer to him, you begin to dance along to the music, swaying your hips along to the beat.

“Sweetheart, I swear to god…” he warns, but you can’t hear him, too intent on annoying the hell out of him.

“You know that my favorite thing to do to you is to annoy every fiber in your body, It’s honestly an obsession of mine.” you chuckle. Eddie sighs, a soft smile forming on his lips as he recollects all the times that you did just that, there were far too many to count.

As you continue your dance, you notice him, stealing glances at you, his eyes drinking in every curve of your body, admiring the way his shirt fit you, the way it sat on your bare thighs, riding up with every step you took. You grab the bottom of the shirt, drawing it up your body and revealing your panties, watching the way he shamelessly licks his lips. He knew there was no way he was going to be able to finish studying, not when you were tempting him so, especially not if you kept singing that dumb song. Eddie throws his textbook aside, and leans back, this time giving you his full attention. “And if I have to crawl upon the floor, come crashing through your door...Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore!” you sing. He doesn’t know how you do it, manage to annoy him so, and yet at the same time make him fall for you even harder. Reaching out, Eddie grabs your arm, pulling you down onto his lap, taking your headphones off, and setting them on the coffee table. You can’t help the fit of laughter that hits you as you look into his dark brown eyes.

“You are driving me crazy,” he chuckles. You open your mouth to offer a rebuttal but you’re met with lips and tongue, silencing you immediately.

You don’t recollect moaning his name until your back meets the couch, Eddie on top of you, and your clothes gone. Your hands tangled in his hair as he worships every inch of you with his mouth. Claiming you in the ways that only he can. His fingers cling to the soft skin of your hips, holding you in place as he makes his descent down your body, his lips and uneven breath fanning across your burning skin sending shivers up your spine.

Your back bows at the feeling of his mouth, whimpers as his tongue glides along you, and sweet shocks of pleasure course through your veins. As you focused on the lapping of his tongue, the movements of his fingers, he was focused on the rise and fall of your chest, the breathy moans leaving your lips, the sudden jolts of your body. Nothing was as beautiful as you were at that moment. No amount of art or even music could bring him as much joy as you could.

“I should have done it more. If I would have known that's how you would react…god I would have done it all the damn time. I mean for crying out loud, that tongue of yours is truly magic.”

Truth be told, Eddie wished you had, wished that you still would. He would give anything for it now. To see you prance around in his clothes, completely engulfed in your own little world and blissfully unaware of everything around you. Even to hear you sing this song terribly, just to get at him. You were his breath of fresh air, and he needed you desperately, just like he did then.

Indescribable, the way he felt having you wrapped so tightly around him, your fingers gripping to him as if in a moment he would slip through them. Your head foggy as you move together in sync, sharing labored breaths as your lips graze each others. The coarseness; of his voice like music to your ears as he whispers words of encouragement, everything that you need to hear as he coaxes sinful sounds from you. His hand finds yours in the chaos, fingers intertwining with yours as he holds your hand above your head.

Crying out as the ache inside of you subsides and your release hits you, only to be swallowed by his lips, as he pushes you through it. Nothing but pure bliss as you feel him follow after you, filling you completely. He collapses on top of you, only to rest his head against yours, and pull you into an innocent kiss.

“I will say this, Eddie…I do believe this song is magic...I really do. I swear anytime I listen to it I'm instantly taken back to that exact moment; one I will never forget.”

The song fizzles out to a stop and Eddie’s eyes open. As he leans forward he notices one more tape and his heart wrenches. He’s not sure if he has the strength to listen to the last one, knowing that once he does, it’s done, you’re gone. He knows he can’t wait forever, not when he needs to hear your voice again. With a shaky breath, and trembling hands he puts in the last tape. Finger hovering over the play button.

“Come on Eddie,” he mutters. He runs his hand over his face, wishing that somehow it would wipe away every semblance of pain and dread from him. Finding the courage once more, he presses play and closes his eyes.

“March tenth, 1986, I got my acceptance letter to Columbia and told no one, I wasn’t going to tell anyone but you found out, ” you struggle, your voice soft and melancholy. Despite wanting to sound happy, alive, and well, you knew that it was just wishful thinking. “My father had no right to tell you, to make you feel like it was your fault because it wasn’t”

Eddie’s jaw tenses at the mention of your father. He had never liked Eddie, and he understood why, it was for this very reason, Eddie stood in the way of your dreams. He didn’t know it, not until your father told him, however.

Eddie stood in the doorframe of your parent's home, anxiously waiting for you to save him from the silence that your parents were giving him. They had never liked Eddie, and for what reason, he had no idea. He had never done anything to give them a reason to dislike him so, and yet they had found one of their own.

“Have you congratulated y/n yet?” your father asks, his eyes boring straight through Eddie. With a nervous chuckle and a faulty smile, Eddie’s left to ask what he means.

“Columbia, she got her acceptance letter…Did she not tell you?”

He could feel the color draining from his face at the words. He’d had no idea that you had even applied anywhere other than the University of Indiana.

“She told us she wasn’t going to accept,” your mother chimes in.

Eddie had a strong feeling that they were implying that it was his fault, that because of him you weren’t going to go to Columbia. At one point Eddie might have fought them on it, told them that it was your choice and that he had no weight in the matter, but something told him that was wrong. Something told him he was the exact reason you weren’t going. His jaw tenses, as he stares at the staircase, waiting for you to come down, and if on cue, you do. Rushing down with a smile on your face.

“Hey, babe!” you say, rushing over to kiss his cheek. He doesn’t know why but he can't seem to find the words to say anything to you, but you were far too happy to notice. You say your goodbyes, kissing your father's cheek and blowing a kiss to your mother before you drag Eddie out of the house.

“It has been haunting me, the fact that we haven’t talked about it…not sure that we will ever get the chance, but..” You mumble the last bit and it's like daggers in his heart. It had been one of the very reasons he had been beating himself up since you died. You had never fought, never disagreed on anything meaningfully. It killed him knowing that he had been so cold to you, angry that you could keep something from him. What hurt more was that he never wanted to talk about it, you both just let it hang in the air acting as though it wasn’t there, as it silently tore you both apart.

“I guess now is my chance..”

“Columbia! When were you going to tell me? Or better yet, were you even going to tell me?” Eddie asks, his tone harsh as he paces back and forth in the trailer.

“No, I wasn’t going to tell you, because it doesn’t matter, Eddie! I’m not going..” you shout at him. You were fuming, you had wondered why the entire drive he had been so quiet, so distant. And now you knew. “You know what, Eddie, I really don’t see the problem here?”

He stops in his tracks, turning to look at you, eyes narrowed and cold, something you had never seen from him before. “The problem is you are throwing away everything you have worked for, every dream that you’ve had to stay here in this shithole with me! If you fucking think that I would ever let that happen, you’re delusional. I could never live with myself knowing that the only reason you’d stay is because of me. I’m not worth all of that.”

You stand up, tears burning in your eyes as you approach him. “You don’t get to say that. I’m not just staying for you, I’m staying for me,” you argue. Eddie takes a deep breath, suddenly unable to meet your eyes.

“No you’re not, because if you were you would never have had applied, nor would you be keeping it from me! Did you think that I want this for you, want you to be stuck in a town with no opportunities, a town that's cursed and sick? Do you really think that I would ever allow that?” He retorts.

You scoff, taking a step back, “Allow!? Eddie, you don’t control me, I make my own choices same as you, It is my choice on whether or not I stay. You don’t get to take that away from me, you don’t get to push me away.”

You sniffle, crossing your arms over your chest as a sense of security. You’d be lying to say that anxiety wasn’t building inside you, worrying about where this conversation would inevitably end.

“Sweetheart, I can’t let you throw away everything you’ve ever cared about for me, not when there is so much more out there for you. You have to go, you have to go and live your life without me,” he says sternly.

The tears break free from your eyes as you ball up your fist and hit it against his chest. “Don’t say that! You’re the one making me give up the only thing I care about. You.”

He doesn’t say anything, doesn't look at you, because somewhere in his mind he knew it was the truth. You would never achieve anything in this dumpy old town, and especially not with him. He also knew that if he looked at you, crying into his chest, desperately clinging to him for comfort, he would give in, and he couldn’t.

“You have to.” was all he said.

That had been the only discussion that you’d had about it. Leaving you both broken and unsure of the future. You had told him that you would go, both of you knowing it wasn’t the truth. It had come to the point where you both danced around the whole thing in general, neither one of you bringing it up again. It pushed you apart, leaving a void in both of you.

“The truth is Eddie, nothing you were ever going to say was going to make me change my mind. I had it made up from the very beginning. I only applied to please my parents, and sure a part of me wondered if I would get in, but in the end, it didn’t matter. I wasn’t going to leave you. You are my future,” you choke. He could hear the way you were trying to silence the sobs that were leaving you. The way your voice quivered as you said future. Tears stream down his cheeks at the thought. To him, you had always been his future, his everything. He wanted to build a life with you, a family, an adventure just for the two of you. He wanted to spend his days making you happy. It had always been the plan, and in his own twisted way, pushing you away was his way of doing that. He thought that if it was meant to be, you would always come back to him, but in your mind, you would never leave him, because it was meant to be.

“You are my everything, Eddie. I hate that we fought, we never did until then and it killed me. It killed me to know that you thought that I could just leave you, I would never leave you by choice, never…”

You take a deep breath, doing your best to collect yourself. “I hate that I never got the chance to say it, but I love you, Eddie Munson. I don’t know why it took me so damn long to say it, especially not since I knew it from the moment you slid into my booth, but I am saying it now. I love you, and I will always love you. No matter what you do, or how hard you try to push me away, Always.”

Eddie didn’t think his heart could break anymore until he heard you say it. It had always been an unspoken thing between the two of you, you knew he loved you and he knew you loved him, but hearing you say it meant so much more. He gasps, releasing the breath that he didn’t know he had been holding, his heart racing and his head reeling as he tries to calm himself. His hand clutched his chest, desperately trying to cease the pain he was feeling.

“I’m sorry I never told you about Columbia. I never thought that I’d have to, as selfish as that sounds. Also, I’m sorry if these tapes are causing you pain, I didn’t want that, but I didn’t know if I would ever get the chance to tell you this in person. I don’t blame you for anything, and I don’t want you to blame yourself for anything either, I know you will and I need you to promise me that you won’t. “Promise me, Eddie…say it..”

“I promise sweetheart.” he breaths, wiping the tears away with his hand.

“Eddie, baby, I need you to do something for me, and I know you are going to object, but I need you too,” you pause, letting out a small chuckle. “I need you to live your life, don’t throw it away. I need you to graduate and continue to make music and do whatever else it is that your heart desires. I need you to open yourself up to someone else, to fall in love, and to let someone fall in love with you the way I did. I can’t have you missing me always and missing out on all the great opportunities that I know are going to come your way. “So here it is, I chose these songs because they’re my favorites. They remind me of you, of all the moments we shared, all the laughs, kisses, tears…To me, they are the perfect narrative of our story.. I chose them because no matter where you are, I will always have them, and therefore I will always have a part of you. ”You stole my heart from day one, with your bold comments and eccentric attitude, your inability to ever stop talking about the things you love, or in general. You made my life so much better than what it would have been if you had never walked through Andy’s door, and for that, I have to say thank you. Promise me you won’t miss me too much, just be happy, god, please just be happy.”

There’s a long pause and Eddie wonders if it's the end of the tape if those were your last words until he hears it once more. That damn song falling from your lips once again, but this time it’s not pitchy, it's not annoying, it’s bittersweet.

“My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you…I've been running round in circles in my mind...And it always seems that I'm following you, girl…'Cause you take me to the places that, alone, I'd never find..And even as I wander, I'm keeping you in sight…You're a candle in the window on a cold, dark winter's night...And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might..And I can't fight this feeling anymore…”

The tape stops, and a tear falls down his cheek as he stares at the box before him. There was never a doubt in his mind that you were the one for him, his soulmate, and even though you were gone, he’d always have a part of you left. He pulls off the headset, places it gently in the box once more, and closes the lid. Even though it still hurt to say goodbye to you, he felt he would be okay, knowing he still had you by his side, always.

a/n: I cried like a damn baby writing this shit, I hope you did too! Also, I would love to hear your feedback!

Yep, just reread it and cried even more. 😒

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