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#two way gender
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# the nature of what it is to be trans is just that: natural
It’s been around for as long as us human animals have been around.
We need to be careful in acknowledging it as inherently queer not cis mandated it should adhere to the queer spirit for queer bodies not the cis hets perspective that was born from brutal colonisation
An issue I don’t see getting the light it deserves is how the cis normative world, propagated by colonialism, and by this I mean how colonialism was excused and executed under the title of ‘the civilisation mission’. A mission that was to forcibly indoctrinate the entire globe to take on the culture of Europe aka Eurocentric values. Such values included their two way gender system.
With that being said, as a gnc brown skin individual, right from as early as pre school I’ve been subject to how this European cultural view of gender confuses the cis.
Are you a boy or a girl? What are you? A child I would think to myself, but the aggression of their confusion made my little empathetic self unable to speak up.
Since growing up and finding my way into the trans community in my early teens I have also experienced cis strangers telling me it is obvious I was born male and trying to be female when I never could. I have also been told by cis strangers it’s obvious I was born female and trying to be male when I never could.
What I have learnt from this is:
Cis hets: we are allowed to tell you in an array of ways how you do not fit our two way gender system, but don’t you dare ever declare this yourself, do not find your own label to be defined as, as we will tell you it does not exist.
To the cis I cannot exist as their female nor their male but I MUST try to and accept their criticism as never being able to. To them it is obvious I can not fit in either box but I am not allowed to declare this I am not allowed to make my own space I just have to be victim to their standards and European ideologies harming my body and identity.
It is frustrating how their own self admitted confusion to them is not confusion but proof of their own egotistical righteousness over all the bodies that do not fit what they feel theirs do.
I have learned that a large body of the medical community related to the care of trans bodies will push for you to fit into the European two way gender system. Creating guidelines such as presenting as one particular gender a year before being prescribed hrt or obtaining surgery. To have surgeries that fall in line with how a cis body would look. That to fight these things means being pushed back, being labelled as not ready or mentally able and so on.
I have found that in contrast to the history of the what it meant to be transgender now the focus more revolves around the ability or at least intent to pass as a cis body to cis eyes. To pass in the Eurocentric ideals of a gender identity. This has been one of the hardest realisations (don’t get me wrong there’s been many) to know that for the longest time the state that is being transgender was about acknowledging the vast array of NATURAL states that exist outside of the Eurocentric two way gender ideals. To know that I missed out on that and came to be in a time where it was catered to the Eurocentric gender ideals. Sort of feels like “fine fine, we acknowledge this trans thing but only if it adheres to Eurocentric gender ideals as much as possible and we will mercifully push for this as much as possible”. It’s sad. It makes me mourn for the little me, being heavily attacked by the eyes of Eurocentric ideals (in virtually all ways) and having my birth right (humans as social animals are communal animals, the first of us lived nomadic lifestyles in ‘family-bands’ aka little communities and I believe we are all born to have this as is our birth right) - my community being invaded and remoulded by Eurocentric values before I even had a chance to take my first steps within it.
I believe it wasted a lot of my time and created unnecessary amounts of confusion which makes it so much more infuriating when they accuse the state of being trans as WHY there is confusion. It also blocked me from learning and honouring my natural states (always more than one state to every body I won’t argue on this) for far too long when it existed to be the opposite. Our communities exist as natural formations of natural connections to natural states of being that align and harmonise in ways that become a safe space and type of home.
I think it’s exciting now in my late twenties seeing more of my community using terms such as ‘he him lesbian’ ‘girl cock’ ‘dick clit’ ‘girlfriendboyfriend’ ‘butch boys’ and the like. The queer and trans community stem from the space that existed to permit those terms. The space that existed to acknowledge and provide a home and voice to the incredible amounts of variance within any one body. So make up words if you find yourself indoctrinated into a language that does not describe you enough to be able to speak your truths. Remember that one thing colonisation left us with is European languages dominate the globe still. Remember that in order for this to happen many languages were brutally changed and eradicated (books and educational spaces burnt to ash). It makes sense to have to create your own language to survive in the post colonial world. Remember that although once the USA was colonised it successfully and lawfully divorced itself from Europe so whites could be recognised as American only, they still all come from Europe and so mainly speak English (most successfully globalised European language) .
So don’t be embarrassed and don’t sweat how much the Eurocentric world will throw fits at your neo pronouns or how you rearrange and reconstruct and disable and reinvent the words they assign to you with languages that our ancestors were beaten into submission of. Of course it will rattle them. It’s living breathing proof that despite how well colonisation globalised European culture to take over ALL cultures and their beliefs/languages/paradigms aka sense of reality, bodies, souls, minds, hormones, biology continue to grow unable to fit their space. It’s proof that having one culture dominate ALL cultures is what is actually unnatural. That even with generations and generations of nations swearing to raise everyone to submit into European culture, it still cannot hold us all. That there are still an immeasurable amount of us that can not, that will not, that would rather die, that those who well fit european culture even acknowledge- we can not be held by - their cultural ideals. That there are natural forces that can not be reckoned with no matter how many generations you try to beat it from us.
I cuddle younger me with this knowledge and by seeing all of you exist as yourselves even when having to fight daily to be able to do so because the world around you continually tries to reconstruct what your words, feelings, bodies, minds and souls natural states are.
Please keep fighting. Be unapologetic. Keep showing up as you. Even though I’m not a little butch gnc child anymore I still benefit wholeheartedly from seeing it just as you do. We all do. Our community has existed for eons, expressed in all cultures. Remember that it was only one culture that has had so much self hate for who we are and that it was through the brutalities of colonialism and globalising their culture that we even have to fight to be seen or heard. Do not give up. The only weird thing is telling a whole globe of souls to adhere to one culture that was so out of sync with all the other cultures. It is weird to see a thing and say it does not exist and weird still to see another of that thing and another and another and deny it’s existence and weirder still to see it go further back than whoever first said it does not exist and still persist IT DOES NOT EXIST. That’s weird. Not you. Thank you for existing in a world that constantly tried to erase, you, your community and our rich history. Remember that those against you are slaves to a culture that harmed their own people too, there’s no real power in that but there ir is sadness and sickness and they will try to project this onto you. Don’t let them.
-Tahari Spirt
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redysetdare · 5 months
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I think queer stories would be better if people stopped assuming that queer representation hinges on if two characters are romantically involved at all. Like the moment you accept characters as being queer without needing romance to prove said queerness then i think we'd find ourselves with a lot more unique, nuanced, and interesting queer stories. but by limiting queerness to only romance you are stifling queer stories.
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houseswife · 5 months
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if the target audience of house was middle-aged cishet dudebros then why are all the promo shots of him so sexually compelling to me personally. like what feelings are these meant to evoke other than “I need to fuck that old man or so help me god”
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lyxchen · 3 months
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Sometimes I think about queer love and get overwhelmed with all the joy and happieness I'm feeling and it's one of the best feelings I have ever felt <3
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chawliekin · 1 month
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and if I said that dennis’ insistence on being the breadwinner/provider despite literally being a pampered princess who dgaf about traditional roles of masculinity in every other regard (aside from ego) is because his mom only stayed with/chose frank for his wealth and dennis is highly aware that he’s difficult to love and unable to show his emotions openly so he has to be contributing something to the relationship materially in order to feel like he’s worth staying for… and mac grew up with parents who were extremely ambivalent to him and eachother so he has to overcompensate by proving his worth at every given moment and seeking praise/validation from people (and religious icons) who will never demonstrate the same amount of dedication to him but he has no idea how else to desperately keep himself close to those he loves other than by eroding himself into something they’ll approve of… dear god they’re both exactly what the other needs — someone who can’t and won’t leave them even if they try — and they don’t even see it…
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finelythreadedsky · 2 months
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ancient greece had some weird notions of the female going on. like what do you mean the innermost nature of women is the concealment of their nature? what is pandora an imitation of? if women are by nature deceptive, do they in fact reveal the truth of what they are in using their bodies to deceive? can you cover covering itself?
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muffinlance · 7 months
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I was rereading fellow prisoner li and I had an idea
Canon divergence au where instead of anyone doing feminism at the north pole aang accidentally panics and says trans rights
Aka instead of giving them any time to regroup and plan, aang's mouth moves faster than his brain and when they say "girls learn healing boys learn combat" aang says "what about me?" and leans hard into the "avatar incarnation of all those who came before, polygender because I contain multitudes" thing. you can't sexism me I have all the sexes, they're ghosts who give me god powers when I'm stressed out
I am now deeply in love with "AU where Aang goes 'Avatar State, yip yip!' and turns into Yangchen every time Pakku tries to drag him away from the healing huts".
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scrawnytreedemon · 9 months
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some picked-mins i doodled, alone in a server vc :}
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haxxydraws · 2 years
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Meet me halfway (I love you, I love you)
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uncanny-tranny · 9 months
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akantorrr · 11 months
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The Ballad Of Blind Love
I've had this one song stuck in my head for literal weeks, so here's art (2 versions cause I couldn't decide on the colors)
Fellow italians, I'm sorry for turning a 60's song gay
(song's "La Ballata Dell'Amore Cieco" by Fabrizio De André btw)
More details and variants here
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starkcontrasts · 2 years
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obi-wan kenobi is stronger than me bc if i was "two halves of a single warrior, closer than friends, closer than brothers, knew each other more intimately than lovers" with a 6ft moody twunk i wouldn't walk away from him twice i'd simply dom him into stability
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silent-browser · 2 years
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Conspiracy theorist: *standing infront of a large board full of unexplained phenomena and red string* "so you see aliens DO exist and they ARE out to GET US and I'M. NOT. CRAZY!"
Alien in disguise: "mhmm mhmm. I see your point but have you maybe considered that if aliens were roaming this planet they might just be looking for a cutie human to settle down with and spend their grislo- I mean "end of their days" with? And even then, what can truly be considered alien? Anything from space? If that were the case then technically the photons that come from your center star are alien but your planet and people rely on them for life function. Maybe it means that not all alien things are bad?"
Conspiracy theorist: "You're so naive and sweet Hun but unfortunately thats not very likely because *goes of into another nerdy ramble/ tirade*
Alien in disguise: *sigh but affectionately and kinda wondering how they are gonna tell them*
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marlynnofmany · 1 month
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If you're curious what Tumblr looked like over a decade ago
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I just found this screenshot from September 24, 2013.
We used to have our notifications show up in the middle of the dashboard, between the posts. Great for newbies like me who were excited when anything got attention, but as soon as something got just a little bit popular, uh, stuff got weird.
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public-trans-it · 1 year
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Man, I genuinely owe my life to FtM Girlies. Without them I wouldn’t have figured out my gender shit anywhere near as well and would probably still be going “Yeah I’m a trans gal. That’s… close enough. I’m happier as that than a Cis guy so I must be, right?”
Without them I wouldn’t have really taken the time to sit down and realize just how fucking weird gender can be, and the kind of things you can do with it.
I will forever remember the moment someone I was chatting to was discussing their pronouns, and pulled out a damn FLOWCHART. It could more or less be summed up as “Cis people: I am a trans dude, I use He/Him pronouns. Binary trans people: I am nonbinary. I use They/Them pronouns. Everyone else: Use whatever weird shit you think applies best to me.” and looking at it forced my third eye open and allowed me to realize just how vast the potential of gender was as a means of self-expression and identity, and how much of our identity rests in our relationships with others.
That was the moment that made me take a step back and go “Well now hold on a second. DO I want to be a girl? AM I a girl at all?” Sitting down and questioning “If I was AFAB, would I be cis?” And realizing that the idea of being a cis girl was just as revolting to me as being a “cis” guy for so much of my life was. Had I been AFAB I absolutely would still end up as trans! Which got me thinking about what my transition goals actually WERE.
Even now years later I stilled haven’t explored the full extent of my gender, and the potential that still lies within it. It’s become so tangled up in my relationship to DID as well as my views of animism. It’s something deeply personal, and I’m not sure if I’d ever even be capable of sharing the full extent of it, though am happy to try for the curious.
The more I talk with friends, the more I realize I’m not alone in this. Bespoke genders are AWESOME and incredibly common actually! Even my ‘cis’ friends that I’ve talked to, when we really explore it, and up saying stuff like “Yeah I’m like 90% cis. There’s certainly SOME complex stuff there but it’s small and not worth the hassle”, but even as they say that I can see that bit of joy of not HAVING to bottle up that tiny bit anymore. And it’s beautiful!
EVERYONE should be comfortable exploring the full extent of their gender. Everyone should take pride in that little tiny sliver of gender fuckery dwelling inside them!
Fucking… reply or tag this post with what your own personal brand of genderfuckery looks like! I wanna hear it! I wanna give everyone that outlet!
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airenyah · 1 month
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listen!! i really need love and dunk to play siblings, twins or something like that
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