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elite-connectionss · 2 years

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Important Signs the Person You're Dating Is Not Ready to Move Forward by elite matchmaker, Tammi Pickle

Tammi Pickle has been VP of an exclusive and elite dating agency for 20 years. She says you shouldn’t be investing your life, and heart into someone who is possibly semi interested in you. Even worse letting them use you for bad intentions or wasting your time. We all deserve a person who treats us as a valuable part of their life. Someone that admires, respects and loves us. They reciprocate our feelings and time. With a well trained eye, it's fairly easy to see if the relationship you think you’re in is real. You should take a step back and reassess if you’re happy and your decide if your needs are being met. Are you giving your time to a person who can barely find time to spend time with you? Here are a few signs that show you if you are working toward a romantic level, or even a friendship relationship.

1. Do they only call or come see you when it's convenient for them? Do they ask you for favors every time they call?

If the person you care about only calls or texts you late at night when the day is over, it’s because it’s convenient for them and they don’t care that much about your feelings. Yes, I’m sure they had a busy day but if they can’t pause for a minute to say hello at a normal hour, there’s a problem. You shouldn’t respond until the next morning. You shouldn’t get in the habit of letting them come over late at night. We all know that’s not a good idea and they are only reaching out to see if you want to be with them at that late hour. Because of course, it's what is convenient for them, or they want something from you. Our staff at Elite Connections reviews so many couples and the things that go wrong in relationships. Letting people take advantage of you is a clear sign that the relationship is one sided and it’s time to move on.

If someone cares about you they should be letting you know that you are their number one priority. Not just when they want to come over late at night. When the only time they want to see you is in an intimate way, and not an intellectual or engaging way, you’ve got a problem. You need to spend time that will help you become a couple and bring you closer together with your minds and hearts. It’s equally the same for men and women. Don’t waste your time and energy on someone that’s not into being with you during regular days of the week, during normal respectable hours. This is one of the first things I have trained myself to notice when reviewing clients at Elite Connections. How serious are they about wanting a relationship?

2. Do they ever talk about the future? Are you part of that equation?

This really is all about how long you’ve been a couple. If you’ve been together six months, that’s really not that long. You shouldn’t be overly obsessed with what your plans will be together in the future, because you’re still in the early stages of a relationship. After a year though things should be moving forward. At the two year mark you should be comfortably discussing plans for your future. It could be starting a business together, living together, buying a home or discussing marriage and getting engaged. Vacations are an important aspect of every serious relationship, even if it's just a weekend trip, flying to a fun location, or a trip out of the country. You need to spend time like this to see if you both are good together in unfamiliar environments. Your relationship will be tested when you spend time together on short and long vacations. Do you have petty arguments? Especially ones that arise on what's supposed to be a pleasant vacation, it will taint the relationship years down the line, and make for a bitter or resentful relationship. Your partner will think about the unpleasantness, and won’t suggest a trip in the future, and they probably will spend less time with you. Vacation fights are something you should consider as a serious red flag when planning your future with someone.

The person you care about isn’t a mind reader, so you have to tell them how you feel if you want things to be better. If they can’t give you what you need, it’s time to walk away. At Elite Connections I review so many singles and discuss the mistakes they’ve made in previous relationships. The number one issue women tell me is, waiting years to leave a bad relationship. That’s years you can’t get back and wasted energy given to someone that didn’t deserve your time and love.

3. They treat you great, than the next day they are distant and cold. Or they disappear and don’t call at all for a week. These are signs that the person isn’t that into you and you’re simply not that important to them.

One minute they are crazy about you and then you don’t hear from them for a week. Common sense says that you don’t matter to them like you should. When you’re getting to know someone they might seem to have these tendencies, but it’s because you’re not a couple yet. Give someone new, time to get to know you. Wait and see after you have a committed relationship how they behave. Even in the beginning stages of a relationship they should be making you a priority and trying to win you over.

If you’ve been dating seriously for more than six months, than it's time to find out how they really feel about you. You have to ask them how they feel about you and be focused on having a better life. Don’t let someone manipulate you that’s not truly interested. If your door is always open for someone to come and go, and you’re letting this pattern happen than you’re destined to be unhappy. If they come back to you, after a long period of not reaching out, don't jump at the chance to see them.

A normal relationship will eventually evolve if you are spending more time together, not less. Not seeing someone you care about for long stretches of time is not acceptable if you’re looking for a real relationship.

We all know things happen that are out of our control, business, family, or health. You have to give people a break sometimes. But be smart about it. If someone can’t send you a text to say they miss you, you’ve got a big problem.

Some people are happy with a few texts a day and seeing someone once every other week. Others require a lot more attention. Make sure you and the person you care about are on equal ground and want the same things. If you want a committed relationship and they don’t, or to spend more time with you, than it’s time for you to move on. They are simply not the one for you. No reason to be upset and devastated. It’s just a fact of life. Sometimes you’ll meet people that are crazy about you, but you’re not interested enough to continue. It goes both ways. It’s your life adventure and your personal happiness in the end is what matters and should be your goal

4. They are not over an ex.

If they constantly talk about what went wrong in a past relationship, it’s a huge indication they aren’t ready to move on. If you have been dating someone for only a few months, and they continue to talk about an ex and the issues they had, you could be wasting your time. The person you’re dating should be focused on you , not the past. They should be happy and putting together a relationship with you. If they are still upset about the past, they clearly aren’t ready to move forward with someone new. You really need to address this issue and see if it can be fixed from here on out. It doesn’t matter how important you feel the information about an ex is, you have to let go to move on. The past is the past, and simply not worth bringing it up. Read the full article…. https://joom.ag/uPWd/p44

The elite matchmakers at Elite Connections review each client, and quality singles have been signing up with them for 28 years. This elite dating agency works with singles that are serious about finding the best possible match. Contact the elite matchmakers and Tammi Pickle at Elite Connections International 800-923-4200 [email protected]

www.eliteconnections.com

To know more details, [ Visit Here ]

#elite matchmaking #elite matchmakers #Elite Connections Reviews #elite dating agency

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sugar-petals · 3 years

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SuperM as Boyfriends Headcanon

↪ caro’s note. extra long version because i miss ‘em. best boys, they’re all bf material to the moon and back ♡

5k words | bullet points

○ warnings ⚠️ 18+, dom/sub play, shibari, female reader, grinding, poly mentions, threesomes, face-sitting, femdom & vanilla, smut and fluff

⌈ ten

— motto: they won’t underestimate me for long.

most of your social environment is gonna be confused by ten at the beginning

and don’t really get what he’s all about

or think he’s like whatever, some random guy in a tank top

acting peculiar

finding him kind of hard to gauge

some of your family and relatives might even think he’s totally unusual and a sneaky fuckboy making you mad

they seriously wonder what you see in him

down the line that perception has turned by 180 degrees

as it should

ten becomes more irreplaceable, relatable, beautiful, perfect and impressive the more you know him

he’s not as mysterious and impossibly badass as everyone assumes

his personality is very approachable to you

and you find him interesting in every aspect, looks to hobbies to background to personal habits

and also opinions because ten is a guy who really thinks stuff through

so you gotta be roughly on the same wavelength

he likes discussing controversial and complicated stuff a lot for sure

being far wiser than his age suggests

you are the first to share those things with him until the rest of the world catches up to this gem of a person

spending so much time with you

in the most personal way he can

he takes you to see the floating markets in bangkok, you spend the summer in thailand

wakeboarding and playing badminton

his entire family knows you inside out at some point this shit is serious

it’s very important to him to go back to the roots every now and then

and that you have been around his home city as well

getting to enjoy the area and time together eating the most savory delicacies

renting a boat and paddling you around to the important spots, he can explain any question you have

this kissing is gonna be so romantic

who needs a vacation in venice when you can go to thailand with none other than ten himself as your ferryman let that sink in

except eating durian there he is, the boyfriend who can do anything!

with seemingly no effort

ten does little kind services of love for you throughout the day

he pours you herbal tea, fixes some furniture (he’s surprisingly good at tinkering), comes home from the bakery with your favorite pastry, does the laundry with your favorite fabric softener

he also goes on a huge shopping spree with you monthly because fashion is key in this household and it’s tremendous fun

you giggle when he puts on oversized shirts deliberately to look funny

everyone in the clothing store will think oh man what an adorable pair

ten will model the living hell out of the entire stock

and buy you the cape you really really want as a birthday present

said item turns out to be your favorite couple accessory

because you can sit next to each other on a bench at the river and wear it

what’s not to love about a portable blanket

of course he will take to instagram and make it such a cool thing, photographies of you wearing really cool coats and jackets

mirror bathroom selfies together as well, with a back hug, the classic

and not just for insta

you snuggle a lot generally

ten is always available for affection

and accepts all PDA

he’s a kitty after all, he loves the warmth of your body more than you know

remember how taemin said ten’s hands are always cold, newsflash not anymore since you stuff them into the pocket of your hoodie whenever you can

and hello sir your paws will be nice and cozy on my waist

or hand in hand when you waltz through your apartment

time for dance is a must

oh my god ten is so good at all of this

although say he’s definitely faster into latin than standard genres

tango argentino, he loves flamenco as well

don’t believe me? ten is a diehard rosalía stan!

vamos

so, no-brainer, expect a lot of dancy stuff

that escalates into wild, passionate fucking

which probably looks like an aggressive form of couple exercises

you poor sore souls

ten’s lil kitty butt is falling apart from all the “i can handle a bigger one!”-level pegging and you have aching legs all over

favorite position? full nelson

if you ask me ten’s ass is probably so carved out by the end of this you could fit lucas and kai in there from head to toe

this is not for the faint of heart

sex with this guy is extra cardio

and if you’re into that a threesome is gonna go down sooner or later

with our girl lisa

there. i said it

miss manoban in those knee-high boots, grinding her thighs between yours and you finishing off on ten’s face? the fucking hottest thing ever i need a moment wow

i don’t have to tell you how orgasmic this is gonna be

steamy sex life with ten very recommended

⌈ kai

— motto: you’re like a precious rose. i’ll protect you forever.

to be straightforward with you

he is in so heavily in demand it’s madness

to give you an idea of the scale

mark is basically occupied by yuta until the end of time

but kai has an entire idol fanclub on top of all erigoms

those sharp moves did not go unnoticed

he gets an inkigayo sandwich every other day

jesus christ

if rent-a-sexy-bf.com was a thing kai would be the most requested

his phone would be blowing up with contracts like

and you also have to pass kyungsoo’s vibe check

and taemin’s

the road to being kai’s gf is indeed the way of the samurai

i mean honestly: kim jongin is without a doubt the hardest member to get a date with

this has got to be the most selective man of the entire industry or something

if he likes you he REALLY likes you

and he will be the one showing initiative

because he wants to make it clear he isn’t just spending time out of politeness or something

although it’s pretty logical that if kai was unable to reject someone he would no longer be an idol but a harem husband busy every hour of the day

seoul would be able to found its own village

kai town

where like 70% of the population is pregnant

but since kai wants to keep on dancing obviously and he wants to lend his heart to only one person

seoul has to settle with a singular nini family house instead of a kai district

where you and the man himself are a full-fledged household basically since kai’s nieces double as actual kids

if you wanna be a young ass ‘mom but not mom with kids’ and be married to kim kai this is it

does he have a thing for milfs or something

that thought just came to my mind

anyway you’re mommy anyway wink wink

fucking til’ dawn until even his muscles hurt

going raw at the gym together

him cooking the most random food with the infamous waffle maker

cuddling with an army of teddy bears surrounding you

walking the dogs with the sexiest dancer alive

and the sexiness is only the tip of the iceberg

we know he’s all-round amazing

kai is the king of figuring out ways to chill out with you anywhere anytime

and yes innocent chilling

...unless you’re in the mood for something else

up to you

anyway

sweet innocent chilling for now... with the stunner... just smooching at best things aren’t going raw or anything

on the couch in the kitchen in the car when it’s parked somewhere in nature

kai takes you very seriously and is a great listener

he’s literally so respectful and open-minded i can’t

he will keep your secrets and stand up for you if it’s ever needed

yes he is extremely caring and invested

kai does not tolerate others being shady towards you

if there’s an instance where you are hurt and unable to assert yourself don’t worry. he knows how to confront others with measure but a firm determination.

kai takes a lot of that responsibility but only to the degree where you are comfortable

i think you get what i mean by that

and he is diplomatic instead of plain patronizing

you have a right to be protected. it means he not only treats you well, but also makes sure your well-being isn’t disturbed in any other way outside of the relationships

outside influences aren’t to be underestimated

and since kai is a godly man you encounter a lot of jealousy from others

a matter he will take into his hands since he knows he’s the reason

standing up for you also means saying no

to these jealous voices so this is an important boundary he has to draw

that all kinds of hellbent people want to get into his pants and take his stage image too literally is not up to you to fix

kai is there for you to enjoy and love not to defend

that’d be exhausting and beside the point

kai prevents stress and negativity to come to you

i hope i explained this well he doesn’t do this to be bossed up or make you weak it’s because he wants to make life easier for you

guys being protective will be chalked up as chauvinistic these days. often rightfully so

but what i mean is that kai support you in all regards so you won’t be at a disadvantage or feel terrible about something

⌈ taeyong

— motto: we’ll take good care. enjoy the pleasure.

he’s the type of boyfriend who will ask you about things he missed out on while he was busy

things um from the internet

while mark literally knows that one by heart already taeyong will ask you things like what the wellerman song is

and you thought it would be something nsfw

i got you fooled

did we forget that the man literally watched nct memes on youtube

taeyong is both even more 18+ than you think but also even more innocent than you think it’s complicated

this man is just hard to describe he’s so different, i mean every person is unique but he’s an original it’s the extra mile you know

anyway

sea shanties

bopping to it all day since he just heard it

singing it while he prepares dinner based on a youtube recipe video as he often does

he’s the most adorable person ever ever ever

asking you why shanties are back in fashion

(good question, requires a deeper sociocultural analysis i reckon)

planning to remix one for his soundcloud lmao i kid you not

maybe your favorite shanty

featuring fast-pace rap and all

creating his own previously unknown phrases and shit like that you know him

palazzo rocco lemon detox flashbacks

he’s hilarious i swear

taeyong will produce his own shanties for you can you imagine

as he says: my happiness is your happiness

watch out he will drop a shanty music video with extra krumping moves

taeyong is a never-ending source of pure crack

prepare to laugh a lot like, a lot lot

how can a man who seemingly has such a serious outlook on life and such a bonkers kinda face be so lighthearted

it’s like he’s peter pan or something

especially since he has to manage like over 20 brats in nct his cutesy behavior towards you as his gf will stand out to you

yeah so to be clear we all know he’s the cute one in the relationship

and guess who wears the pants

that’s always you ma’am don’t deny it

or wait

not for long actually because they come off um physically

but not metaphorically

because who doesn’t wanna sit on his face tbh

your favorite reserved spot

he loves it

taeyong has such a thing for your body it’s ridiculous

mister lee got a sexy mama

and you have such a thing for the gloriousness that is him

but neither of you will not admit it as openly as other people would think

all there is... is being flustered

baekhyun probably has to play some cupid now and then

and give you some ideas

like gifting taeyong plushies and things like that

baekhyun knows what taeyong is all about so the advice is very welcome

but most things you find out for yourself

by being a little braver with him you know

you walking around naked in the apartment or basically fresh out the shower with nothing but a towel

will shake up taeyong so immensely, he will back himself against a wall without you even pinning him there lmao!

jeez he’s so deep into kinky stuff but easily shook anyway

i quote him again: “born to be cute, i dunno!”

you can imagine the overwhelm when you rub yourself against him like it’s nobody’s business

it’s so much fun to give taeyong a regular horny meltdown not gonna lie

this man was grinding his whole body all over the superm stage and now he’s basically freezing up and drooling

how many denied and ruined orgasms he’s gonna get, so much overstimulation all the way

you’ll lose count of it

and just how wet you’re gonna be

is a thing for the history books

taeyong isn’t such a big deal in nct for no reason god gave him every talent

so great sex is obviously in his repertoire

i think you’re gonna break some records for most fucks per week

you know... guys like lucas taemin kai and baekhyun spend more time wooing and teasing and flirting

but taeyong gets down to business

one glance is enough

⌈ lucas

— motto: the hottest couple around.

ah, big boy

you really got this man’s attention

doing nothing much at all really

he probably just saw you walking around talking to friends

carrying an impossibly huge veggie burger munching and enjoying yourself after going on a jog

yeah boy that’s how you catch his eye

they say love begins in the stomach and that is the true meaning

or the nose, your food smells really good, lucas is going crazy, he’s seeing stars and shit

anyway

the towering burger isn’t the only thing he wants

lucas cannot get you out of his mind no matter how much he tries to distract himself

with more good food, movies, games

fooling around with wayv or the superm maknaes, and working out

he’s admittedly... a little himbo head over himbo heels with you the feels got to him

he’s not gonna say it’s a date he’s just gonna invite you just because

to hang out in the kitchen while taeyong cooks and baekhyun comes up with the idea to play twister

imagine lucas with his long arms and legs bending himself all over the place

fighting with kai who almost crashed his shoulders into taemin who avoided the accident quickly

making you lose a round

obviously lucas will hustle until your team wins

mostly because he’s so tall and baekhyun is so small which is a huge advantage when stacking each other over the map

let’s just face it baekhyun only suggested this game to bite everyone’s butts and to see you have skinship with lucas

which is definitely a successful plan of the leader

yukhei is in paradise

jumping around his room like an oversized bunny after you went home

don’t lie, you fell hard for him as well he’s just such a presence

emotionally, physically

a gentle but persistent giant

he’ll do anything to make your relationship happen once he knows you’re interested

if there’s someone meant to be a boyfriend it’s gotta be him come on

he will cave in after a while and admit he can’t just forget about you

not gonna lie

your ex is gonna be shaking in his ratty boots

his poor eyes will literally jop from their unexpecting sockets

when he sees lucas hanging out with you

with his shining blonde hair and tall stature, that perfect shapely body, with great fashion on top of that

looking like your guardian angel

man, xuxi really does

pulling you out of your slump that’s been going on for months

and bringing back smiles and a good time he knows how to do that best

and big big hugs of course

you can imagine how soothing and grounded it feels with such huge arms around you

he will make sure that feeling is always there when you need it

because you deserve that treatment

which means he will come over very very often

yeah get ready for how yukhei is a lot more driven than you think just dial and he will be there

underneath the meme surface is someone very determined who really really wants you

yukhei is chaotic good incarnate but in that area he isn’t messing around

his brain is like: “gotta be with her”

on repeat

he must call you, he literally can’t sleep without tying loose ends together as quickly as possible

no second wasted with this guy, even far down the relationship timeline

i really pity your ex

i mean someone dating any superm member would drive their former partner completely nuts

but lucas is a special case

he has that kind of look and aura that makes other guys dig themselves into the ground like wiggling worms or cope by fanboying over him

i don’t wanna make this sound like a competition and yet — congrats on your noodly blondie boyfriend alright

⌈ mark

— motto: two nerds in love.

how to explain this. mark is a perfect balance of a lover, a talker, and a shy bean

with a tendency toward bean

and flicking the bean

you know

cutting right to the chase are we

mark is very invested in pleasing you as good as he can

and defeating his awkwardness

because if we know one thing it’s that he always strives to become better and better like he can’t help it

and isn’t afraid of almost biting off more than he can chew

how many subunits is he part of at this point is it gonna be nct hollywood as well god dangit

back to the point mark doesn’t treat relationships and sex as something static which is a good and rare thing

he does his best and always looks for room to improve

while being very nervous, very bilingual, it takes two languages or more to express what he thinks about you let that sink in

that’s very shaky first date sex while being extremely in love with each other

lucky you

and an afterglow where he plays the guitar for you

that’s so nice

he can play it while laying down and shit

while singing

not rapping, actual full-fledged serenading

we’ve heard how that sounds in the relay cam

are you dating some kind of teenage heartthrob or something huh

mark will make it very clear he’ll stick around, this bad bitch is here to stay

or actually, he’s a good bitch, don’t misunderstand

mark doesn’t have a lot of edgy in him unless rap is concerned

he’s the kinda guy to get lost in IKEA with

having a good time

as often as his schedule permits

you really have to make use of your time together

this man might as well the busiest idol out there

and you are no different because birds of a feather

you’re both mr. and ms. independent

out and about very often

so meeting up becomes something special during comeback season

or wait mark always has a comeback going on

which is a double-edged sword but something you both know you signed up for

which is why you spend a lot of time around NCT dream, 127, and SuperM

sm’s publicity agents have to work extra hard i’m telling you

a dating rumor is the last thing both of you would need

since you befriend several members you gotta stay on the low as well

but hey the rage of jealous people of the public is nothing compared to the force of nature that is yuta nakamoto

who seriously thinks himself threatened and robbed

in case you are feeling possessive as well...

...you might have to fistfight yuta

to be able to be with mark

who is basically property of osaka at this point

yuta is a scorpio that’s just the way it is

unlike taeyong who wishes his rap buddy the best, yuta kinda wants to be mark’s wingman and see him date, live his best life

but also have mark for himself to fawn over and to adore, to be fascinated by

we get it yuta. bisexual struggles. very understandable

you have to promise in person that mark doesn’t forget about the holy gaming nights with yuta

which is hilarious since that’s not up to you but mark’s memory

bestie, yuta uses everyone as a scapegoat don’t sweat it too much

regardless you put a weekly reminder on the fridge

so the roaring lion yuta would be pacified

he doesn’t want to lose his sweetheart can you blame him

the ultimate but also most risky solution is obviously inviting yuta for movies

which will be appreciated but also cause a storm

mark will definitely break a sweat when you start a popcorn war or try to prove who hugs mark the best

caught in the middle of mayhem is mark lee’s specialty what did you expect

this either ends with murder or a chaotic open relationship down the line

yuta really is attached but who wouldn’t be

it could be worse mark has double the love you know

⌈ baekhyun

— motto: you wanna know why i’m your candy?

baby tell me are you ridin’?

in fair verona where we lay our scene...

that baekhyun always wants to woo you — his way, which proves to be very interesting to say the least — is never hard to miss

putting in effort is mochi default mode

no matter what stage of the relationship you’re in

he might as well regularly serenade you under your balcony in the backyard just because

probably singing ‘baby we can stay up’ and wiggling his ass in all directions because he’s a dirty boy gone wild

yeah. nowadays romeo is twerking instead of feuding with tybalt

that’s good for him and everyone involved

you in particular because you get some very racy eye candy

you know how baekhyun is

at least nobody’s around seeing him put on an 18+ show like that

your little guy is one unhinged fella

if it starts pouring he will grind up and down the next lantern and belt out ‘singing in the rain’

you bet he can do some actual pole dance

he’s strong and bendy you know

and loves to gyrate his whole bag of bones like... he wants to hit you with all the body rolls

in the rain

what a freaky man

but hey you wanna stay up for sure

doesn’t take long until you beckon him to come upstairs

where the only way to alleviate him of his wet clothes—

oh well he has those roger rabbit vibes and you can’t be mad at it

he will play off all his hormonal antics

baekhyun is hilarious

and so perverted, he can keep up with your spicy idea of playing patty-cake don’t worry

how do i know you’re an extra nsfw kinda person?

who else would like baekhyun

he says juicy things all the time

and does juicy things

yes. finally a couple on eye level indeed.

when baekhyun asks are you ridin’ you ask how hard

bruh

this is gonna be fun

and remember

beside handing you sacks of money

his priority is always to make you smile

i’m kidding about the bags but

baekhyun is so rich it’ll show in your relationship, but he’s more about the interactions with you rather than the lifestyle

baekhyun didn’t hustle for a bentley he hustled to sing and get out of sm alive alright

financial stability: important

luxury: very nice to have, he can make you the presents you want to have and travel a lot together

but smiles: baekhyun priority

because he so badly wants to know you love him and adore him, he sometimes feels so insecure

of course you do

you always reassure him with your reactions

it’s very important to him don’t underestimate it

baekhyun has always been talking about his ideal type in terms of how he can cheer her up

so even the naughtiest sexy time evenings are gonna be filled with all giggles

anyway other than that your pussy will be dripping

because this guy is as horny as all other members of super m combined

and you have your ways of leaving him tongue-tied and wrists-tied

taemin’s impact

superm isn’t short of bondage supplies we all know that

so yeah. shibari baekhyun is gonna happen

since he does pilates imagine what kinda shapes you can bend this lil guy into

and take some pictures

privé is in trouble

bondage model baekhyun is bursting onto the scene

you might even run a risque blog that features cropped pictures with him

heh — you think people will recognize him by his body?

nope

first: you only upload HD pictures that aren’t whitewashed

baekhyun is basically never photographed like that

second: who expects baekhyun to be featured on a bdsm blog with his girlfriend

and this is the guy that drives you around in his expensive car with his big black shades on

well what can i say

nothing is the way it seems

⌈ taemin

— motto: i’ll unfold a whole new world for you.

taemin is cocky, he’s sensual, and: a very smiley person as we know

least boring relationship ever

he will prance toward you whenever he can to involve you in cuddles

touch-starved taemin is a thing

kkoong can tell you about it, he needs kisses and embraces so often

might as well pepper him with it no problem

and put him into your oversized sweaters when he eats ice cream on the sofa, watching movies, and you brush his ever-growing hair

he’s smol he’s gonna fit into them don’t worry

and on the other hand he likes a rough and tough girl who thinks of him like a boy toy

who acts tsundere or like his bodyguard

working out almost daily to the point of sweat all over

a gal probably able to pretzel minho lucas and chanyeol into one giant bundle

taemin truly has the taste of a divo

multi-layered as always

so you couldn’t say the relationship is always the same in sentiment, the vibe of the dynamic could be different every day

we love a complex man

what would be volatile to others is actually an advantage up close

because taemin understands every difficult facet of himself and his partner

even if those facets might be contradictory

or something that’s felt shameful about

he will accept and listen anyway

the same goes for getting what drives you

taemin is like a walking psychology velvet couch with fancy swirls as arm rests

point is he isn’t fooled by the surface of the world

he knows what has to be known

which also means your looks aren’t the part he prioritizes

and not even outward personality and habit is what he’s drawn to

it’s the mentality and values underneath

that’s true compatibility to him and he can feel it

he’s really really smart

and also finds it important that you get along with shinee and superm, that you think they’re nice to be around and vice versa

especially kai as taemin’s absolute bearly bestie. if kai thinks you’re shady and you don’t like kai either

or if you’re permanently super awkward and taemin’s moodmaking doesn’t help

we have a problem

but fair enough

kai and taemin are basically one soul at this point so if taemin likes you jongin does anyway

bff telepathy

in fact jongin was probably the one introducing you to taemin lmao!

because he knows you go well together instinctively and he is correct

so not to worry then

and it’s good on taemin to think longterm and not see you as a person outside of social interaction y’know

cough cough he thinks about marriage, you might be ms. lee one day

here he goes again taemin is just very mature seeing you as well-rounded in every aspect of life

without letting his dick make the important decisions at the detriment of making this a relationship of two lives not just two bodies only

but obviously don’t assume taemin is no horny devil. we all know he dreams of the freakiest scenarios and fantasies in this whole group

going kinda crazy about the thought of making you cum which he always wants to try with new methods

which occupies his mind more than a big bowl of super spicy noodles which is taemin’s favorite meal so

at the same time taemin junior is definitely the same clingy attention whore as his sparkly owner

limp wrists from all the handjobs on your side

and very swollen lips from giving all that head on his side

this is gonna be interesting

he puts the 6v6 in 69

equals 69v69 am i right

but i’m serious that’s gonna be a lot of oral action

you definitely ask each other about having sex very often, daily if you have the time and find a nice spot

and how on earth do both of you keep your hands off each other sleeping in one bed

taemin is touchy as hell with no shyness, and you squish squeeze and grope this guy like the mochi he is

ah when things go both ways

827 notes · View notes

mbti-notes · 3 years

Text

Anon wrote: INFP with social anxiety here. I have a therapist but we're focusing on some other issues right now. In the meantime, I was wondering if you had some advice for me. I know you're not a professional (you say that multiple times in your posts) and of course I'm not asking you for a fix for my social anxiety with this - I'm just asking your help to understand what part my cognition could be playing in all of this cause I'm really curious.

Basically, my problem is the time frame right BEFORE I meet someone and, sometimes, immediately after. I don't really have problems socializing in the "middle", if you get what I mean; I'm easily adaptable and once I'm relaxed, once I realize no one is there to attack me, my mind starts getting ideas and I kind of know what to say, even though I'm a bit out of practice and I still have problems convincing other people of my emotions (like, mirroring their emotions so that they know I agree with them and stuff like that; for some reason they never ---believe me when I say it with words).

When I make plans, anyway, and I still haven't met the person, I get this anxiety: like I would rather stay home than go there because it's going to be "boring" and I'm probably going to feel like an idiot or make some sort of social gaffe. I mean, I do kinda get bored after a while anyway, but I also know I tend to overestimate that level of "future boredom" to the point it hurts me to even think about showing up and forcing myself to think of stuff I can-- say.

I get anxious because I start thinking about the way people used to treat me in the past (I've always been the black sheep of my family and/or my social circles and I vividly remember some bad things they used to say to me) and I start worrying that, deep down, they still think of me like that and they're never going to forget that "preconception of my identity" and open their eyes to who I am now, or I guess to who I've always been.

I do realize it doesn't make much sense, this "who I ----really am" part - but I've always had the impression that I was a bit different than the "me" they percieved, maybe because after many, many years of being accused of "selfishness" and "inability to tune in with the emotional atmosphere" I learned that in order not to ruin the "social mood" I should've adapted myself to the group - but the problems is that I suppressed "myself" in the meantime (and with myself I mean, like, my real interests, the things I'd like to talk about for ages without-- having to be interrupted or looked down on because, quote unquote, "ok, cool, but we don't really care").

I understand now that if they don't give me hints of actually caring about the subject I should stop rambling like a fool, but this is making me feel like I have nothing "useful" to offer them and therefore bringing the anxiety I'm struggling with. It makes me scared that I'll never be able to be myself around them because of the "social rules" I want to respect to be accepted, & to make----it worse I'm out of practice like I said before and sometimes it just gets too awkward and I want to get out of there.

I bet I'm doing something wrong because friendships and relationships in general are not supposed to be "boring", am I right? And yet until I don't get distracted by the actual conversation, I feel like it's going to be really boring and uncomfortable and sometimes going through it is SO horrible... most of the time I end up making up some excuse to go home earlier and talk----my internet friends instead (thank God for the internet!!!!). Anyway, thank you if you'll answer! And have a good summer vacation c:

-----------------------

The first thing I notice is that your thought process bears a very striking resemblance to many INFJs who struggle with social anxiety due to poor Fe development (see past posts). As a general rule, if I have good reason to suspect that someone might be mistyped, I won't provide info about function development until they undergo a proper type assessment. Otherwise, they might adopt the wrong method of improvement.

You say you want to understand what part your cognition plays in the social anxiety you experience, so I will mention the aspects of your cognition that seem most significant:

1) No Chill: You overthink things to an extreme, to the point of self-sabotage, perhaps even creating a self-fulfilling prophecy (i.e. when expecting the negative actually makes the negative happen). Overthinking means that you're not confronting the real obstacle getting in the way of your socializing. You're constantly trying to envision, imagine, or predict what will happen in a social interaction? WHY? What's the point of that overthinking? It's how you avoid confronting your fear head on.

2) Insecure: Your "predictions" are too often faulty because of being tainted by your underlying insecurities. You're insecure about being attacked, being accused, being misjudged, doing something wrong, being deemed of no value or unworthy of care, not being accepted or acceptable, dying of awkwardness, feeling bored, feeling uncomfortable, and on and on. You've described your thought process in detail. But nowhere do I see you confronting your insecurities, digging deeper into them, in order to understand the root of them. Insecurities are a manifestation of fear.

3) Control: Irrational anxiety is oftentimes about trying to control things that you shouldn't be trying to control or cannot have any control over - it wastes mental energy and leads to futile behavior. As long as you're trying to control social situations and their outcome, you are either trying too hard to make reality match up with your expectations or you're fumbling whenever reality unfolds outside of your expectations - you become rigid and frail. You claim to be "adaptable" but everything you say after that only proves you don't know the meaning of the word. You can't handle unpredictability, hence, the attempt to be in control by trying to "predict" everything. Do your attempts to control actually work? Do they help or hinder you? If they mostly hinder you, then isn't it time to change your strategy? Anxious people often believe that having more knowledge or control is the answer to their fear. But, in your case, the huge cost of being controlling is being incompetent. What's worse, the fear is still right there running the show.

4) Unresolved Trauma: You attribute your troubles to your past. Fair enough. Growing up in a social environment that did not respect and appreciate you is painful, even extremely traumatic for certain personality types. It also makes people too hungry for validation. It's natural that you wouldn't want to feel the pain of it again. However, if that pain remains unexamined and unresolved, you will unconsciously keep seeking to resolve it, which means re-enacting the trauma over and over again throughout life. The proof? Every time you meet someone, your first stance is defensive, because the first thing that comes into your mind is that you don't want to be attacked or invalidated. That old pain is running the whole show because you are deeply afraid of experiencing it again, yet you don't realize that YOU are the one calling it back up and rehashing it. What are you doing to resolve the pain rather than indulge the fear?

5) Self-absorbed: Social anxiety makes people too absorbed in their own thoughts, feelings, hopes, and expectations. They are too preoccupied with what they want, what will happen, how they will be perceived, how they might make a mistake, how they might be attacked, etc. This means they're not truly present with people, so the relationship can't really go far. Driven by fear and insecurity, they are always behind a wall, too difficult to reach.

Even if you happen to meet the right people, do you make it easy for them to befriend you? It seems that you can't open up with ease, you can't go with the flow of the other person when they don't live up to your expectations, you can't keep your emotions in check and misjudge situations, you get bored when it's not about you, you run away instead of making things better. Looking at yourself objectively from the outside, would you want to be friends with someone like that?

If you want to have good friends, you first have to BE a good friend. You want care, love, and validation? We all do. The best way to receive it is to be the first to give it. By being more aware of other people's needs and doing more to show that you care about them, you put them in a better position to care about you and meet your needs in return. This is the difference between actively trying to "make" a friend vs passively wishing for a friend to drop into your lap.

Being a friend isn't about what "value" you have, as though you're some kind of object being appraised and sold. Being a good friend is quite a simple matter of putting out the energy to care and show that you care. When you meet someone who's moved by your care, they will care for you in return. When you meet someone who's unmoved by your care, figure out the real reason why, in order to determine whether you should keep trying or put your energy elsewhere.

You never really know who you'll hit it off with. One of my favorite experiences in life is making a friend in the unlikeliest of places. As an adult, meeting new people is a numbers game. All you can do is keep pushing yourself to meet new people. The more people you meet, the greater the odds of clicking with someone. If you're looking to meet like-minded people, go to places that are likely to have people who share your interests. If you don't hit it off with someone, simply move along. You don't have to be friends with everyone, do you?

Yet, you take every little social interaction so seriously that each step is like life or death - that's what makes socializing tiring, laborious, and unfun. Why not enter into every social interaction with an open mind and an open heart? Why not truly go with the flow, without having to undergo the repetitive ritual of predicting what will happen or fussing over what did happen?

6) Poor Emotional Intelligence: This point is the common thread that runs through the previous points, which is why I keep repeating the word "fear". You have extremely low tolerance for negative feelings and emotions, which means you really need to work on learning how to deal with your emotional life better. Any little sign that things won't turn out the way you want and you start to panic, overthink, blame, or flee. Why do you recoil from yourself and your own feelings and emotions? Why are you so easily shaken by boredom, awkwardness, invalidation, failing, other people's negativity, etc? Why do you react so badly to these things (when others just brush it off and keep going)?

7) Low Self-Awareness: It's not enough to just name the fear ("I'm afraid of____"). Does the label explain why you have this particular fear and not some other fear? It's not enough to blame the past ("It's because of ____"). Why did someone else with a similar past as yours not develop this fear? To get to the root of fear, you have to identify, in exact terms:

what aspect of you has to change to overcome the fear

what aspect of your identity has to "die" (i.e. be let go of) in order to evaporate the fear

Until you answer the fear properly, it won't go away.

#social anxiety #anxiety #fear #emotional intelligence #mental health #ask

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conscious-love · 2 years

Note

Hello,

What should I do in this situation?

I have a sibling who for no reasons gives me the silent treatment, out of nowhere. Most of the time, everything would be fine the day before, we'll talk normally and joke, then all of a sudden the next day, they act as if I don't exist. This often makes me question everything I did the past few days. It makes me feel guilty for something I never did. No matter how much I try, I really can't think of what I did wrong, especially if everything was fine the day before. I'm just so tired of this constant behavior, they do this every summer. I'm tired of running after them and trying to mend things.

The worse is that we live together, and my family tends to side with them as well since they'll act over-attentive with them, as if they were showing they don't need to talk to me. This oftentimes excludes me from family things because when they engage with family, which they do a lot, I won't have a way in because it's their conversations. Also, usually my mom would also start giving me dirty looks for no reason.

This is a really distressing environment for me, but I have nowhere to go. I feel so scared and dejected, and one time this lasted half my summer vacation. I end up subtly engaging in restrictive eating just to have something else to focus on.

It really feels like I'm the toxic one, especially since others start to be over-cautious with me as well.

I try to be positive, give them space, or even just ignore them back, but it's all just the same. I always feel miserable at the end.

So I'm left question everything, myself included, and I know. If there's anything that I know for sure, it's that I'm not a bad person. I may be stubborn, but I'll never go out of my way to make someone feel bad, yet this makes me doubt my very person.

Just wanted to get different opinions on this. Anything at all would be somewhere to start.

It definitely sounds like this is a toxic environment for you. I’m sorry you’re not getting the attention, compassion and respect you need from your family. It must be so painful for you. I can certainly see why you’re questioning yourself, since several people are mistreating you, and they are your family. It’s hard to work on your self-esteem while living with people who bring you down.

It sounds to me like you’re a kind, caring person who tries their best to be good to people. I can see why you’re confused about their behaviour and wondering if it’s you. Have you considered that maybe the reason you’re blaming yourself is because you don’t fully grasp that not everyone is as caring as you? Being mistreated can hurt anyone, but it especially hurts people who are naive about malevolence. This is not a judgement on you, I’m not using naive as an insult. What I mean is, people who are kind and caring are susceptible to emotional and physical harm when they don’t fully understand that there are people out there who are unkind. Think of yourself — it would take a LOT for you to be unkind, wouldn’t it? So maybe this is why when someone is unkind to you, you assume it’s because of something you did.

I think your main focus should be to truly understand that other people do not think, feel, and love like you do. Not everyone cares about how their behaviour affects others. Even more than that, some people intentionally hurt others. I don’t know which of these categories your family members fall under, but either way, the way to overcome this is to develop the understanding that other people’s behaviour is about them, not you. Even when they think it’s about you, it’s about them. Of course, there can be valuable information about ourselves in the ways people treat us, but sometimes it’s all about them.

Perhaps you could talk to your family about how their words and actions make you feel. It’s possible they lack self-awareness, interpersonal skills, and emotional intelligence. Maybe hearing from you about how their behaviour has hurt you will be a blessing for them, maybe it’s exactly what they need. Sometimes people are just toxic and we need to put up with them until we can leave, but sometimes what’s missing is us communicating our needs and setting some boundaries. We can’t expect people to read our minds.

Separate your self-image and self-esteem from their behaviour. Know who you are so deeply that they cannot take it from you.

Communicate honestly with them; tell them how their actions and words make you feel, and ask for what you need.

If they gaslight, invalidate and shame you, and continue to bully you, repeat step 1 and do your best to survive the rest of your time with them.

Best of luck to you, anon. And again, I’m sorry you’re being treated this way, especially by the people you’re supposed to feel the safest with. If you can’t find what you’re looking for from them, you will have a found-family some day, a group of friends who become your family. Hold onto that.

Take care 💙

~ Bella ✨

#ask bella love #disordered eating mention

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gummybearzgocrazyagain · 3 years

Text

MALEC FIC REC POST, vol.3

vol. 1

vol.2

Media AU

Society Rules by @Tiger_Tiger_Burning_Bright [it is apparently based on films i’ve never heard of - The Philadelphia Story / High Society - which does not make it any less entertaining. malec are childhood friends, who had a falling out 5 years ago, and now Magnus is back from London to interrupt Lightwood wedding, aka the social event of the season]

Making my way to you by @asharee_arie [woah, what was that??? is the correct answer “a perfect fanfic”?? what a muthafuckin delight, where has this gem been hiding this whole time??? i was on the floor, rolling around and squealing like a newborn piglet. Intended as some kind of Office AU, this piece does not necessarily follow the outline, but who cares, when the story, and characters, and author’s style are all that perf??? i am in luv]

Mistletoe and Margaritas by @nevermetawolf [this is legendary, and i mean, muthafuckin epic - Office AU so authentic you’d feel it in yo old bones... author calls it a crack fic, although it was anything but!!! major must read for those, who’s ever loved office, allllllll the kudos]

Once Upon a Time in the Clouds by @Fatale (femme) [one of my all-time fav authors, every time i come by a piece i have not read yet, is like a huge YAY, what a talent. so this piece is an AU of something called “sky high”, which i have no idea about, but luved it nevertheless, Alec is born to a family of Supers, and is going to school for children with superpowers, but he himself is yet to manifest any.]

Quite Magical by @lorenzobane [Hogwarts AU, and what an adorable thing it was! granted, i’ve never actually read any of HP books, this was such a delight though... alec is bad at potions, and magnus has to tutor him *wink*]

Chef AU

the way to a chef’s heart by @lecrit [okay, the GIANT SMILE one’s face acquires when one finds out there is a new lecrit fic ≧◠‿◠≦ ≧◠‿◠≦ ≧◠‿◠≦ was reading it, and legitimately squealing like a feral piglet all the way through, cause i fucking luv every single word this woman writes, is like a tiny endorphin explosions in my brain. i know am a hopeless fangirl, but i’ll die on this hill. the way she gets malec, and every variation of them in her works just makes me go (❁´◡`❁) every. single. time.]

kids in the kitchen by @perpetual_journey [cuteness personified, malec are both chefs, and magnus is a single father of max and rafe, and go and read ittttttttt, its that soft content we all need in our lives sometimes]

Knives at the Ready by @harrysglasses [restaurant AU, that is supposed to be a malec rendition of Burnt (am guessing it’s a movie...?), and what a sweet treat it was! i liked author’s style, this is the kind of smooth, unproblematic content one would require to take repose from all the heart-clenching longing i’ve been reading lately... delightful piece to ease thy soul]

Single Parent AU

I Knew From the First Time by @KlaineJane [emmm, excuse you, dear author, who gave you the right to use Rafe and Max to get to my heart, and be generally so fucking cute??? Alec is a single dad of both rascals, that has a meeting with the High Warlock of Brooklyn, and Chairman meets new friends]

And Then I Met You by @everydayfandom [malec are single parents of max and rafe respectively, and alec gets called in to school about the accident max was involved in...who doesn’t luv them some gud ol’ sweet piece of kidfic? those are like a soothing baths for your soul, and lightwood-bane kids are incapable of being anything less than extremely adorable in any interpretation, so]

College AU

Don’t say goodnight by @alistoney [this the kinda lighthearted content i am always here for - College AU]

One year and a bottle of whiskey by @CryptidBane [yassssss, yet another version of the College AU, but with malec as both clueless and pining professors, this type of fic i can read endlessly]

All is Fair in Love and War by @LadyOxymoron [aaaaaaaa, what was this adorableness *major heart-eyes* what a piece, mashallah, college professors AU, where magnus is new in town, and malec is engaging in an elaborate prank war, which, undoubtedly, is nothing more than a prolonged foreplay (c), what a gem]

Canon Divergence

oh, i’ve waited for you by @manticoremoons [so, the fic is happening a little bit further in a timeline, than the books or the series, and Alec is around 30, and... married to Lydia. i know, i know, it almost stopped me from proceeding, and boi am i glad it hasn’t completely, cause it is a damn good piece!]

Hey There Demons, It’s Me (Your Dream Boyfriend) by @thealmostrhetoricalquestion [how many recs of this author can i make, without being deemed obsessed? cause y’all should go and read every single thing they wrote, stat. this adorableness is outta this world, literally - magnus’ summoning went sideways, and the loft ends up populated with the teenage ghost-demon, who is very clearly enamored with alexander... all kinds of fluff ensue]

Something Else verse by @CryptidBane (Impetus) [maybe it’s my fever talking, but i am such a sucker for memory loss AUs, and SH fandom has the richest canon base for those, yay! this time, it’s an AU verse after 3x10: rather than asking for his magic, Asmodeus curses magnus by taking away memories from everyone who’s ever loved him, in exchange for freeing jace from lilith’s thrall... oh, what a beautiful and delicious angst ensues]

Home by @otppurefuckingmagic [waaaaaaaaat... *sits with her mouth open* how did you....? how did he...? damnnnnnnnnn you authors in this fandom, stop being so talented!!!! this is uncannily brilliant]

I’ll hold on until you’re home by @alistoney [how dare you sir, right in the feels... the missing scene in the midst of 3x18/3x19, when magnus realizes what his idiot of a boyfriend has done, and confronts him about the Asmodeus deal]

First time for everything by @nebulein [“Nowhere in a Shadowhunters’ job description does it read ‘must look adorable while infatuated with the local High Warlock’.” - series of firsts written with such tenderness and adoration for characters, that it warms your heart while reading, - it shows how much the author cares for them. it is not finished, but whatever has already been written, is gold]

Fake dating AU

The Great Repression by @CryptidBane (Impetus) [although it might not be exactly my regular cup of tea, i still appreciate this author’s style so damn much, and the way they do malec dynamic overall, so it’s here. magnus is a camboy, and alec is hired to protect him from a stalker]

Friends to lovers

Family is Family by @hexicity [my brains are fried by the covid, so any coherent rec would be unlikely right about now, but the softness of this <333 alec sees an ad about a free room, and when he moves in, he finds way more, than he bargained for... gave me a bit of a “happy, shiny people everywhere” vibe, and that’s an automatic rec in my books, so]

Spinning Around In Circles by @lemonoclefox [my fav friends to lovers/mutual pining trope, here you are, and what a pretty pretty wrapper are you wearing - absolutely amazing interpretation of a trope, that seems to has been done to death, and yet here i am, never able to get enough of it <3]

If it walks like a duck by @thealmostrhetoricalquestion [this. i was reading this. and after every single word. all i wanted to do was get down on one knee and propose to this person. i dunno who the hell you is, but.... how did you do this? it was... another level of fanfiction.]

Neighbors AU

Meow 17:1 Love Thy Neighbor by @high-warlock-of-brooklyn [again, not a fan of drabbles, but who could resist such softness??? Neighbors AU, where Chairman takes some lessons he learnt from “Parent trap” to heart, and alec is a stumbling mess, but he gets shit done, kudossssssss]

Various AU mix

Solid courage by @thealmostrhetoricalquestion [how goddamn CUTE was dat???? answer - the cutest. mashallah people in this fandom can write]

Paper Love by @thealmostrhetoricalquestion [it would not be an exaggeration to admit i thoroughly fell in love with this author’s style, i mean, all and every version of their malec is all kinds of awesome. this one is no exception - catarina works in the library, and malec have to take madzie out to a coffee shop, cause their obnoxious flirting is too loud for the quaint environment of catarina’s workplace.... it’s tiny and so so sooooooo sweet]

make no bones by @ohfreckle [yaaaaaaaaay, what a cutie, tiny preciousness about magnus having an awful day and taking it out on a no-good useless building super, simply delightful]

Freud is a Dick by @sanctuary_for_all [Alec works in IT firm, and accidentally sends someone else’s dick pick to his boss, whom he has a crush on... do i need to say more]

shadows in moonlight by @kaeg [damnnnnnn, son, that was a ride!! something exquisitely soulful, tender and so, so poetic... young malec meet in summer vacation home, and it will take your breath away in the best way possible... warning, it is unfinished, but whatever was written, is absolute preciousness]

For the Love of the Game by @TicklemyPickle [Hockey AU, where malec were childhood friends, but had a falling out, and were not in touch for the last 7 years, until magnus gets traded in to alec’s team... i was somewhat unsure about reccing this, as some of the choices author made regarding their dynamic did not exactly resonate with me, but decided to go on, because, god as my witness, one thing this world definitely needs more of - is malec Hockey AUs, word upppp]

Love Is A Gamble by @la-muerta [i myself do not completely understand, why has it taken me so long to get to the “The importance of elsewhere” author’s most famous piece, but i finally have, it was amazeballs, like, the world-building...? off the charts. the language, the moral struggle, what a gem. alec is a grumpy and surely sheriff *duh!!!* of a tiny town, and magnus strolls in being all... well, magnus-y, and opens a gambling house, the potential!!! anyway, i highly doubt this piece needs recs, so imma zip it]

@ohprongs [this author has too many tiny pieces i like to name them individually, but as far as reccing goes, they should def be mentioned here for their effortless, seamless style, and clear love for the characters in all interpretations, that simply shines through all and any AUs they choose to put malec in]

special mention:

@theleftboobgrabber [i wasn’t aware that at this stage it was still possible to come by someone like this. the author, who’s style would impress me so. that unbelievably glorious Mafia AU, absolutely delightful and literally perfect My mama don’t like you series, and something that went straight to my top-5 - MI6 AU ohhhhh, that MI6 AU... i have no coherent words to express the depths of my appreciation, this is unbelievable fucking talent for writing malec]

#malec #malec fic rec #malec fic #shadowhunters fic rec #shadowhunters

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kookiepredictions · 4 years

Text

Jungkook love language

Jungkook is a true romantic at heart. All those K Dramas you see with the dreamy main lead? Jungkook is that person but for real. He probably even grew up wanting to be that person lol. However, this is something he actually tries to hide most of the time, it’s like a secret he only wishes to reveal to the most deserving person. He might even see this as a weakness because he feels he has to be stronger and more vicious in his profession. But he does not completely kill it either. He just wants that part of him to not interfere with other aspects of his life, mostly career.

In a relationship, Jungkook is more of a giver. This is why he tends to be attracted to the damsel in distress type who he can protect and take care of. As discussed earlier in his Personality reading, this comes from both his Virgo sun and Leo moon which makes him the provider and the protector. However, his Venus being in Libra shows that he actually values equal give and take in a relationship, not material wise, more like love and energy wise. He easily senses when there is an imbalance in the relationship. So for example, if his partner whom he “rescued”, takes him for granted and does not contribute anything to the relationship, he will eventually start judging them and lose the level of attraction he had at the start. Yet, he would not immediately walk out on them because he tends to be in relationships for the long haul. Even if it is hurting him. It would end up being a half baked relationship which is just existing, just because Jungkook finds it difficult to end it. His life path number is 9 and I think it plays a significant role here. He faces difficulty starting and ending things.

When there are problems in his relationships or he has complaints against his partner, he just doesn’t know how to communicate it to them without hurting them. This could be some sort of conditioning from a past relationship where trying to express his honest opinions always led to fights, which made him resort to escapism as a coping mechanism. But it ultimately doesn’t work because it is avoidance which doesn’t last and it can result in a big outburst later, hurting his partner much more than required. This unwillingness to hurt can also lead him to resort to dishonesty which he does not do to have his own selfish way, but just because he feels a lie will save a lot of hurt and drama. This in turn ends up with him living in guilt because Jungkook mostly values honesty and transparency in a relationship.

Jungkook is pretty traditional in the way he defines relationships. He takes this word very seriously. If he dates someone, it is because he has strong serious feelings for them. He is not the type to date just for sex or from shallow superficial feelings. If he wants sex, he’d rather just sleep around making his intentions fully clear than date someone under false pretense.

Jungkook is a naturally loving and caring person, which is why sometimes when he makes friends, people can mistake him as being romantically interested in them. This might create misunderstandings, and clarifications on his part can be mistaken as him trying to wash his hands off of them. This might also be why Jungkook prefers to stay secluded a lot of times.

Jungkook is an introverted lover, meaning he tends to have a rich imaginative world inside of him with regards to love. He is an idealistic person in general and extremely idealistic about love. However, he has self esteem issues that make him feel he is not worthy of having this ideal love that he dreams of, and that he has to settle for less. If you’re in a relationship with him, chances are he feels a lot more than he shows. He tends to hold back on his expressions a lot, not because he’s not capable of showing his love, but because he knows full well that he’s the type to fall hard and fall deep. Once he truly falls in love, he looks forward to making it work long term, and if there’s a breakup, he takes ages to recover. Even if he moves on physically, it leaves a very strong dent on his mental wellbeing— not just the breakup but also all the problems that he underwent during the relationship. This is why, even when he has the feeling of falling in love, he holds most of it back for a long time because he wants to make sure he won’t make a mistake and won’t have to go through the same cycle again, as it is in Jungkook’s personality to not make the same mistakes repeatedly.

His outer expression is actually directly related to the environment his partner creates for him that makes him comfortable to express himself or not. He has likely been, in past relationships, criticized or ridiculed for what he believed about love and how he expressed it, so he tends to now hold those expressions very close to his heart and only shows when it feels very safe. But make no mistake, he is still that K Drama king lol who is always bursting at the seams to show his partner his love. And in many varied ways too. He has lots and lots of ideas and can actually be obsessed with the thought of pleasing and impressing his partner. This is because Jungkook is naturally someone who enjoys making other people happy as long as they are not manipulative. He loves to do many things to make his loved ones happy and then loves to bask in that feeling of appreciation because it gives him immense happiness. This shows through with his love for Armys. When he is on stage, he is always looking at them and genuinely enjoying his time with them, but when there are scandals or Armys say nasty things about him, he shuts out everyone and retreats into his shell. This is precisely how he is in his close relationships as well.

This goes on to say that Jungkook needs to continuously feel motivated in a relationship for him to give his 100%. Because he actually gives 200%. Even though he values equal give and take in a relationship, he does not measure what he gives or wait for the other person to give before he starts giving. He will take every opportunity he gets to make someone he loves happy. He also expects his partner to recognize his efforts and value him and what he does. But he does not expect grand gestures from them, he just needs small but continuous signs assuring him that he is doing a good job at keeping them happy. This is very important to him because his whole sense of self worth depends on whether he is successfully making his loved ones happy. Expect lots of surprises in a relationship with Jungkook, which can range from very grand like a spontaneous vacation or expensive jewelry to small everyday things like making you tea or doing a chore without you asking. He’s the type to fuss over his partner when they fall sick and take care of them like a steward lol. The keyword is sensitive. He tries to be attuned with his partner and is very sensitive to their needs, a provider type mentality. But it is also combined with a need for excitement in life, doing new things and spicing it up from time to time. He also does not treat everyone the exact same way. He first takes effort to understand the person, their likes and dislikes and then sort of customizes his affection towards them. This is why even though he loves all his BTS hyungs, he treats each of them quite differently, based on what they like rather than what he is capable of doing, because that’s his capability— to provide according to the need of others.

Jungkook values personal space in relationships but contradictorily he is also quite needy and clingy to his partner. But it really just varies depending on the partner itself. Jungkook tends to adapt initially in a relationship. So his actions will be in relation to his partner’s personality, their likes and dislikes. Again, this is done in an effort to please them, but as the relationship continues, if his partner can’t evolve with him (because Jungkook is very dynamic in love, relationships and in life in general), he tends to distance himself from them, mostly unknowingly — first mentally, then with his time and attention. In this situation, the partner might think he is too detached. However, if the partner can keep up with him, he will behave the exact opposite where he can’t get enough of them, and the partner might think he is clingy so that’s like a double edged sword for him lol poor guy.

It’s interesting that although Jungkook is very rigid personality wise, in love he is much more flexible. It’s almost like love is the only thing that can get through to this man. When in love, he is almost eager to give you his all and you have to take it he won’t take no for an answer! Whatever you like, he will bring to you, even the moon, he won’t give up without at least trying. But, he always has his thinking cap on. He does not do it consciously, but he will always evaluate you and your actions, never blindly believe you. Blind love is not his forte. He likes to stay alert and awake in love, even when he is drowning in love. It’s not just from a place of fear or that he doesn’t want to be manipulated, staying fully conscious also helps him 1) to fully experience and cherish the feeling of love, and 2) understand the concept of love. This goes back to his most dominant habit of learning new things, of which love and relationships are a very important part to him. When Jungkook comes out of a relationship, trust that he always comes out a much more learned, evolved and mature person. He will never blindly follow the same pattern again and again.

There has to be mutual respect in a relationship for him, it’s non-negotiable. He doesn’t care for irrational rowdy behavior. He likes to solve a problem as amicably as possible. His ideal relationship is where two people can open their hearts fully and communicate clearly without being judged, offended or treated disrespectfully. His ideal relationship is also one where two people love each other with the same passion, dedication, loyalty and enthusiasm as they did on day 1 until the last day, which hopefully would be the last day ever.

#jungkook #jeon jungkook #jeonjungkook #jeon jeongguk #BTS jungkook #bts jeongguk #jungkook prediction #jeongguk

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runfreeblogs · 3 years

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5 Tips for Online Learning during Pandemic

Covid-19 (CoronaVirus Disease 2019) has brought us all into shock when the World Health Organization announced that this virus is classified as ‘Pandemic’. As expected, the virus and protocols will last a long time as it is newly discovered. All of the people are affected through various factors, including us, the students.

Well, we are all caught off-guard by this situation. The things we usually do suddenly became prohibited. Traditional classes suddenly transitioned into online as the people are avoiding physical contacts in the outside world. I know that most of us are having a hard time learning through this kind of education, especially those who don't have the capacity to adapt. That is why I have here the 5 tips for e-learning during this crisis!

1. Find a learning space in your environment. As pandemic strikes through, most of our home members are currently inside our houses. The more people we have, the more distraction we will get. Who would like to have noisy house members while we focus on learning right? That’s why it is important to have our own learning space in our home to avoid those kinds of situations.

2. Regularly check your respective medium of learning. Our instructors/professors will surely upload or give announcements from time to time. We should always check our emails just like your google classroom and gmail. You can’t be lazy on this thing if you are a grade conscious student because activities are only available in such time. All schools have different methods of teaching that’s why mediums used depend on them.

3. Interact with your classmates. Like in the traditional classes, it’s important to have an interaction with the people who are on the same page. Not only will it ease your academic life, you may also find the people who will change your life forever.

4. Take care of yourself. Activities, quizzes and examinations throughout this method is hard when different subjects give them all at the same time. One may have been pressured because of the time frame of those things while others possibly have been stressing themselves out because of the internet availability in their locations. Whatever situation you’re in, it is important to take care of yourself. Have some time to treat yourself! You can cook delicious foods for you and your family, buy sweets to satisfy your sweet tooth, or take a vacation- inside your home!

5. Help your companions. Of course, there are people who are dealing with such situations much worse than yours. With your help, you can spark hopes that are nearly burnt out. Build a bridge to reach them! Help them pass their activities. Give them ideas if they are already worn out. All students have different status in life, and you are always blessed enough to help them.

We’re far from getting back to normal, that’s why we all need each other to cope up with this situation. Let’s help ourselves, classmates, colleagues, and professors to deal with the crisis we’re in. May we all heal as one!

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chocolate-parfait · 4 years

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Hi hi love! Big congratulations❤🥰🦋could i please request an ikevamp matchup❤ i am A female INFP aries. I am incredibly stubborn, shy, aloof, driven, sarcastic and hard to get to know. But once you break through the wall im goofy, funny, go with the flow, playful and teasing. Hobbies: gyming, writing, reading, sleeping, baking and cooking, helping people and watching conspiracies hehe likes: cuddles, art, rainy days, hugs, Sweets, drinking (wine, gin, whiskey), chilling with friends❤🌻1/2

Thank you lots luv💖 I hope you like this~

I match you up with... Theo!

When you first walked through the door, he didn't really think much about you, seeing you as just another victim of Fate's weird twists, and his brain automatically decided that he should avoid getting involved, but after getting to see your true colors he finds himself growing more and more appreciative and curious of you

Your sarcasm and sense of humor amuse him greatly, and when he sees that you're comfortable enough to show him a goofy grin, all the self control he had flies right out of the window

You can hold your own against his and Arthur's constant teasing (a quality very much appreciated by both), though he may get a bit too carried away with it if he gets too comfortable. The moment he sees that you are genuinely upset by a remark he made, guilt will become a constant, throbbing thorn stuck in his heart until he apologizes and sees you back to normal

This will make him realize how sensitive you truly are, and adding to your genuine kindness and care for others, he now already has a full list of things he loves about you; wait- love? That's right. Once he recognizes the fuzziness in his stomach, the spring in his step and the warmth in his chest whenever you pass by, his brain shuts down because Oh God I fell in love

He'll try to keep it a secret for as much as possible, feeling like he doesn't deserve you and not wanting to make you give up your life and friends in the future for him. When you notice his evasive and distant behavior and sit him down to discuss about it you are presented with a choice. If you decide to remain there at the mansion Theo will swear you he will make every day worth it

Bake him whatever you want and he will eat it all till the last crumb. He's not that much of a picky eater, especially when it comes to sweets and things you cook with your own hands, but serve him your home made pancakes for breakfast and your love stats will increase so much that you'll be able to read "Error 404: Not Found" on his forehead

The best date would be you, King and Theo all cuddled together on his bed, a very nice wine on the bedside while you both rant your heart out on topics that vary from Vincent's newest piece to things like the Da Vinci code. The light ticking of the rain against the window as your 20th century lofi music, you chill your whole way through the man's day off, but it is not a wasted one! He needs nothing more than a break from running around all day like a madman and your hugs and kisses are the best vacation to him

Despite being well aware of the sunshine-like side of your personality (that reminds him of Vincent quite a lot), he LOVES seeing you act tough and stand up for yourself. He melts with pride when he sees you telling some punk off for trying to order you around! And since you like working out, too, you're definitely fit enough to throw a punch or two (though he will step in right away the moment someone tries to touch you)

Second choice: Sebastian

He's a man that generally prefers maintaining formalities due to his upbringing in Japan (that we all know as a country which gives a lot of importance to respect) and his job as a butler. Despite your reserved personality he finds himself very comfortable with spending his time with you, and as a result opens up relatively soon. This is something that both amazes and pleases Comte, who is very happy to hear that his butler has found such a great companion

Your determination and willingness to help around and get whatever job done is, on a much more physical level than an emotional one, a blessing from the sky. Though you may butt heads every now and then because of his perfectionism and inclination/habit to correct every single mistake you make, he quickly learns where your boundaries lie and treats you as an equal on all levels

You both seem to help the other loosen up in an environment that, for someone coming from the 21st century, described as extremely demanding would be an understatement. Spending time together grants you a safe way to get to learn a new time period and the residents of the mansion, whereas Sebastian gets to have someone he can freely rant to without fearing judgment

You react well to his weird sense of humor and subtle sarcasm, matching with a pretty dark one of your own, and your goofiness is a breath of fresh air in the middle of all that stiffness. He couldn't be more grateful for it and you can feel his appreciation whenever you try to lighten up the mood

He starts feeling these random fits of nostalgia whenever he looks at you, and just as his brain starts to subconsciously associate you with home, he realizes how much of a comforting presence you have become to him. Admist all those important historical figures, to you he's the one that comes first and foremost for the only reason that he's your friend. His heart greedily wishes to be considered as something more, to become a cardinal figure in your life just like you have become to him, and that's when it clicks. He's in love and there's no way out of this.

(Also, he definitely uses you to collect more data on the residents, but the stronger his feelings get, the more his notes will turn about you; the little thing that have made you smile that day, a comment or an afterthought to something someone said, etc.)

Return his feelings and he will not believe you at first. "Is it really the time for such jokes?" "I'm not joking though?" "...". You can't really see it from his stoic expression (you might have just asked him the weather) but inside he is PANICKING

A relationship with you would mean a constant push and pull of jealousy and a weird pleasure to him. His heart is always trying to carefully balance greediness and a nameless feeling that makes him feel ashamed of himself. On a side you are his (just like he is yours but that is undoubted), but on the other hand a part of him craves to see you with the other residents (interpret that as you like :)). This, though, will be a secret that he will keep forever locked deep inside his heart and won't let out even under torture-

#i read a oneshot of sebastian being conflicted about that so imma join in too #sorry for the wait!!#my writing #300 followers special #matchups #answered

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neuroticpige0n · 4 years

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Chapter 1 of “And The Leaves Would Grow Again”

Read on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26089138/chapters/63457906#workskin

“But what’d be even sweeter is my baby girl making her dreams come true.”

Before the flowers start to bloom again, winter eludes the nostalgia of what fall brings. The trees are more or less left stale and naked, and that is right around the time when snow begins to cover over what’s left off of a racked mountain of marooned leaves. I suppose I could say that it is somewhat of a destiny, that transition. It happens every year with a right handful of masses eyeing into what can eventually turn into a future with lack of suffering. They don’t know what it is that they are doing, that’s for sure. We, as humans, we follow the transitions. We reflect onto nature and change with it. Grow out and grow in. I guess it is just another way of keeping that hope strong. That hope we feel towards the demise of our lost days. That is why many people walk over the leaves, regardless of their position over the recently-sterilized soil and/or a thick layer of winter’s snow they are left under, mindlessly wandering to take their minds off of what they had built for themselves over the summer, the winter, the fall, and back into their pasts of the same old cycle. What they don’t know is that all of this is a matter of self-reflection. It is a matter of learning, not yearning; working, and not thinking. What they don’t know is that these leaves are to grow again. Snow will fall and nature will fall asleep. But one day, with what could be interpreted as an inner power, these leaves ought to grow again. With a single kick of a raindrop, the fruits shall fall and the flowers shall bloom. And just like that, the world just never stops turning.

October 1st, no work after school. 6AM.

“Izu-chan, wake up! Work awaits, school awaits! Wake up! Ochako-chan, wake up! School time!”

“Ah-a, Tenya? My classes do not start until 9AM.”

“It is always better to get ready earlier! Ochako-chan, would you tell him off? Ochako-chan?”

There was a faint sensation of light seeping in between the curtains into Ochako’s eyes. Her morning sight wasn’t completely clear, as her eyes were gapped narrowly, but she wasn’t exactly blinded either. As soon as everything became more clear though, the usual heaviness struck her again, basically begging her body to be turned off and let gone. Only if she was alone in the room, though. She was more or less surrounded by her roommates, whose eyes were darting her way, as quiet as the duo could remain. Even if she wanted to sleep in, their noises would get in the way and wake her up. Not only that, but they even looked somewhat worried, if her foggy vision wasn’t deceiving her. She wanted to say something, really bad, to elude the looks, but the only response that left her mouth was a faint murmur.

“Mhm..?”

Tenya arched his eyebrows, tilting her head slightly.

“Ochako-chan, are you okay?”

Tenya’s voice echoed in her head, but she wasn’t awake enough to provide him with an answer. Her arms, once again, gripped onto the pillow under her head as she buried her face more and more. What her subconsciously led body thought in this case was that perhaps if she didn’t sense him, he’d stop existing. What she didn’t see was her green-haired friend changing the target of his looks from her to Tenya, and mouthing him to give her some time. This was enough of a command to have Tenya nod quietly before leaving the room to prepare some food for the trio. It was common knowledge for these friends now that Tenya wasn’t exactly insightful when it came to emotional business, but it was respected and treated accordingly. Izuku knew his ways when it came to both of his dear friends, being a good judge of character, and his magic worked wonders when Ochako’s emotional nature had to clash with Tenya’s more engine-like, mechanical one.

The boy stood up from his own bed, walking quietly towards where Ochako slept. His footsteps were light, avoiding making any noises to wake his friend up. Very soon, he reached Ochako’s bed, eyeing her up for a few seconds before eventually sitting down next to her half-asleep figure, and bringing his hand to gently touch her shoulder. Izuku has always had this gentle attitude with those people he thought were in a fragile state. His former teacher’s adoptive daughter was an example for this case. He was gentle with his boyfriend when he talked about his trauma regarding his father’s A+ parenting skills. He was gentle with Ochako too, back in high school, when she struggled with a lot of the pressure she had put on herself. Hell, her struggles remained so obvious now, but it was as if she was trying to hide them more than she did back then. Izuku could imagine how tiring it is, but he would still remain trying to get past her wall of forced maturity. He wasn’t exactly sure what it was, but he was confident about this. The empathetic personality he had made it easy for people to mellow up around him.

“Have you overworked yourself, Ochako-chan?”

Ochako turned her head on the pillow moderately, getting in a position where her voice would make more sense when she spoke.

“.. If anything, I didn’t work enough.”

“Two jobs and college? I personally think you’re trying too hard..”

Ochako’s eyes opened a fair bit once again, but it resulted in a yawn and a stretch. She was now wide-eyed, looking at her best friend, and on God, he remained glaring, more concerned than ever. Was she really overworking herself? Izuku would always tell her that the light in her eyes had disappeared after the summer before their first year of college. It was.. A nice summer. Her and her classmates had gone on a vacation together. She didn’t know how her parents had stocked up the money to pay for her expenses at their holiday, but it made her feel guilty during her first few days there. But seeing her friends having fun was supposedly a distraction for bad she felt about “wasting” her parents’ money. It was as if no one cared about what the future held for them for a second. No maturity was needed. And there, she was sort of joyful.

It made Ochako wonder what Izuku meant by the light in her eyes, though. Did she really look that happy before? She could recall that one time she lost a race against one of her classmates at a sports festival her high school had organized, it was when she was only a freshman. She was absolutely ashamed, devastated because even though she thought she was strong enough to defeat the guy, she had still suffered a loss. It wasn’t all that important, it was just a little sports festival, but it still killed her inside after she saw how everyone had counted on her. Even after the race, Izuku had come to the girls’ dressing room to check on how she felt, knowing that she was nervous as hell before it. He was quite shocked to see her so determined and hopeful regardless. After he left, though, she had cried quite a bit. She even called her parents for some comfort. And that was it. What Izuku meant by losing the light in her eyes could mean that she had just stopped pretending to be so happy all the time. It was too much work. A rather adult-like maturity had replaced it, but her antics could still be read by her best friend.

Eventually, Izuku had managed to get her out of bed. She took her brief shower, put on some clothes that would guarantee her some warmth in this fall weather and arrived at the other room with that resident smile on her face. It seemed to soothe Tenya and Izuku down a bit, who were still worried about their roommate’s working habits.

“Ochako-chan! You look much better.”

“Yes, Iida-kun! Thank you, I can say that I’m much better!”

“Would you eat? We have.. We have eggs?”

By eggs, they were too embarrassed that they had exactly one egg. It was boiled and sliced into three, but it was quite funny to look at, as the two were clearly trying to keep their moods up next to her in order to keep her away from that shady feeling that captured her once in a while. It was even more surprising that Tenya wasn’t freaking out over the fact that they had forgotten to do grocery shopping and because of that, they had to share one single egg as breakfast. It would usually get on his nerves so much so that he'd crazily chop the air while lecturing Izuku that food was necessary to keep “this family” alive. Nevertheless, Ochako appreciated the self-control he had that went into keeping her happy.

“I’ll get some food at college, you two can share my slice of egg.” She spoke, followed by a giggle that Izuku eventually repeated.

Ochako had left the room with the two close friends of hers in a happy mood, which was quite frankly, all she wanted to do. Growing up beneath the poverty line all her life, she was a bit used to putting her own struggles down in order to keep the others happy. It was true that these families looked out for each other more, for they didn’t really have anything to lose. It was cozier. More comfortable.

She put on her shoes and coats before shutting the wooden, creaky door behind her, trudging down the stairs into the pathway that led her into the park area, near where her flat was, the same road that took her to the subway all the time. The October sky exuded its usual grey and damp aura, even though the sun was out shining. God, did the sun ever really do its shining at 7AM, though? Maybe it was not only how out the sun was, but how she actually felt. The breeze was cooler on her skin and the urban noises were louder in her ears. Almost as if she couldn’t tell if her senses were absorbing the environment completely, or if she had let go, she herself would be consumed by the monstrosity of an atmosphere. Everything felt light like feathers, from the noises of the dead leaves that creaked under her feet as she strolled the area, to the white light that caught her eye more and more, every second.

I could say that Ochako Uraraka’s cycle revolved around an undying determinism cored in her firm belief of a light at the end of the tunnel. It could even be described as if she was a resident to the season of fall, as if she had never started or finished the stage of introspection. New beginnings. And then, they become old beginnings. And then, she has to do it all over again. A time loop-esque reality of this modern world, one might even say. She did the same thing every day. She went to sleep at 3AM, every day. It is something about the sky that never changes colours for her. It is never that bright blue colour like it is for her friends. It is always as damp as it used to be. Would I take my chances and assume that she’s somewhat, always, a bit under the weather? It takes some time to figure out if some phases are dwelled upon. Plus, the girl doesn’t think of these things. It is only a matter of waiting, and changing, and revolving, but Ochako’s world would never, ever go faster than that. Perhaps, it had just never started turning.

“This cloud looks like a cat! Don’t you love cats? It should excite you more!”

The black-haired boy rolled his eyes with a pained gasp, a meek smile appearing on his face, intentionally hidden by the two others on both of his sides. Well, damn, it really did seem to be shaped..not exactly, but similar to a cat. A cute one even, fluffy as hell. Taking a drag from his cigarette and closing his eyes slightly as he blew towards the sky, he had a bit of a time to re-evaluate the newly forming shape of the feline-looking cloud.

“Now it looks like a cat, with a very deformed face.”

The winds had changed the shape, but the remark had gotten both of his friends to laugh so vaguely. Especially the boy with the cloud-like, pale hair and a slightly swarthy complexion, but it was an all-known fact by now that he would laugh at any joke, funny or not. It could be deemed as an attempt to remain all happy, no matter what would get him down. It could also be just his generally outgoing nature and desire to have everyone feeling sort of included, no matter how funny their jokes were. It was admirable, very much so. His ability to shine like that. His words even, would sound so previously planned, and yet so spontaneous at once.

“Those things are going to kill you, you know. I am assuming that your boyfriend would rather have you alive. Right, Hizashi?”

A naturally loud chuckle slipped out of the blonde’s lips as he joyfully glared at the white haired boy, and poking the sunken cheek of the Mr. Gloom-Personified in the middle. The downcast stimmed a bit after the poke, but elbowed him back, aiming at his stomach. He had a soft spot there, only he would know his boyfriend that well. The rooftop was hit by the dusk’s setting sun, not a single shadow in the way as the two joked and made fun, annoyed the hell out of their introverted friend and his considerable nicotine addiction, spending a moment that was so usual for them, but so unforgettable and special.

“I would, very much so, have him alive.”

“Just put on a shirt, I don’t think there would be a dress code for a bar.”

“What shirt, though? Is it just any shirt?”

“Ochako-chan!”

Izuku’s eyes met Ochako once again as she entered the flat, an endearing smile forming over his lips. She had just arrived back, all-knowing to the fret she would draw with it being quite late in the evening, it could definitely be read from her eyes that it was a hard day. Regardless of how she looked the moment she first came in, she put on a tired smile for the others’ sake, attempting to sound more enthusiastic than she actually was. School was extremely hard on her too, after all of the part-time work she had done the other night, but there was no point in disconcerting the others. Even Izuku’s smile got discouraged by the forced look on her face, but he tried to force himself into positivity for her sake.

“Hello Izuku- Uh, hello Todoroki-kun! Welcome again! Where’s Tenya?”

Ochako nodded in salutations at both of his friends as she spoke, which Shoto had even replied with a tiny smile. He had noticed that Ochako was having a bit of a hard time, and he would perhaps take his boyfriend’s lead in making her feel more welcomed even in her troubled state. Ochako moved forward, leaning over the doorway as she crossed her arms as Izuku responded to her question.

“He went to sleep early, he was a bit tired after school.”

“Awh, we were going to watch a movie together! Anyways.. Another time then, aha.”

“Uraraka-san.”

Ochako had already sat on her bed, unpacking her bag as her name was called by her old friend. She didn’t really have an idea of what she would do now that her evening plan was called off, a bit sad too that she wouldn’t be able to spend her day off with Tenya, whom she had plans with that they had planned about a week ago. She was wondering if it would be appropriate for her to watch the movie on her own, or if she had to wait for her friend and watch it with him the next week. She could use some sleep too, after her day at college being a tad bit more challenging than her other days. “Hmm?”

“If you have nothing to do, would you like to come to the bar with Deku and I?”

“What bar?”

This time, Izuku took the lead in explaining. He was quite certain that Ochako knew what a gay bar was, but he didn’t think that she knew that there were a few underground gay bars near them. Japan wasn’t exactly the best with gay rights anyways, but it wasn’t as if gay bars weren’t allowed or anything. They would pop up there and there, no one could really do anything about it. It was just a bit dangerous that they could get beaten up by the homophobes roaming around, but the couple didn’t fear the idea that much anymore. They had pepper spray and a pair of pocketknives on them. Plus, the bigger of a group they were, the less likely they were to get beaten up.

“You know, the bars.. for queer people!”

“Queer? What do you mean by that?”

“Gay, bi, pan, whatever!”

Ochako laughed nervously, not even considering the idea of spending the night out at first. It was a Friday night too, none of them had classes tomorrow. She did have work, though. Drinking too much could result in a disaster. She could afford to get fired. On the other hand, gay bar? What would she do at a gay bar? Was she like.. that? That sounded so awful- gosh. But, really, was she even gay? She had never considered crushes before. The only crush she knew was how she had a crush on Izuku back in high school, but that was short-lived when Izuku got together with Shoto. Then again, she knew a lot of gay people. A lot of her high school friends were couples now. Ochako was just focused too much on her work to do any sort of introspection regarding her own identity, she never had to. She sort of saw any kind of sex business as a distraction from what she had to do. She could still stay home and study. On the contrary, she needed some off-time. She didn’t really want to consider regrets right now. “Yeah, sure! Let’s go to a gay bar.”

“Listen, buddy-”

“Buddy? Come on, ‘toshi, buddy?”

“Listen, idiot.”

“Hey, that hurt!”

Hitoshi sighed, grabbing the pen from Denki’s other hand. He really didn’t mind tutoring Denki, but with the way his attention span lasted about six seconds each time they actually managed to start studying on a subject, he was having a real hard time. It was quite clear that the boy was not as dumb as people talked about him to be, but he was also as restless as Kouda’s rabbits.

The moment Hitoshi took away the pen, Denki had started drumming the table with his fingers. A sigh left his lips as Denki smiled back at him, moving his head slightly as if he had some sort of rave music playing in his head. This had been the same way for as long as they had known each other. Hitoshi felt as if the world was just too slow for Denki, and studying? Of course it would be sort of impossible, Denki clearly couldn’t even stand the way Hitoshi was slow and effective when teaching the subjects. Being friends with someone as nice as this boy was, Hitoshi had learnt how to be kinder and less competitive. At least, he’d pretend to be that way. He could keep some of his opinions to himself. But it was pretty safe to say that he sometimes wondered how Denki had even gotten into college. Sure, it wasn’t exactly the best college in Japan either, but the material at hand was quite obviously not the most academic human being ever.

“Why did I even move in with you?”

“Because Eijiro and Katsuki moved to America, I’m your best friend and you love me.”

Denki’s restlessness was even calmer for a second. His face didn’t have a smile plastered on it this time, but almost a half-assed one could slip out. He wasn’t exactly in control of his facial expressions, he had been working on that for quite some time now, but he was hoping that Hitoshi wouldn’t notice that he was actually a bit hurt by the remark that he is a lost cause. It wasn’t mean, he was used to it, but he was just a bit tired of everyone seeing him as the hopelessly stupid friend. Though, Hitoshi was willing to tutor him. That was wild! Bakugou and Yaoyorozu had both tried their chances with his enigma of a racecar head, but Hitoshi was actually the first person to reach into him. This meant that he still had some hope in him, yes? He loved Denki, right? The idea made his mind all blurry. His mind jumped from idea to idea, but for some reason, whenever he thought of his friend, it was more or less a clear stream of consciousness. He felt like there was this person he could depend on every second of his life, and that connection was hard to find. Hell, the fact that it was someone like Hitoshi was even an inexplicable concept. Hitoshi cared for him for hours without feeling bored, or showing that boredom.

“Whatever, I just felt like you would forget to breathe if I wasn’t living with you.”

Hitoshi smiled this time, without even the shame of doing so. This guy was such an unfathomable clown, and he didn’t even mean it in a bad way. He missed seeing Eri, Aizawa and Yamada more, that was for sure. But he could always phone them, or visit them and he usually phoned Aizawa every day. They had even figured out how to video call, Eri would show Hitoshi her new toys and tricks and all of that. And living here felt like he still had some purpose. It was sort of strange for Denki when he walked into the room as they videocalled, for Aizawa and Yamada were not much more than his former teachers. He still knew that his friend was connected with the two (and three, if you counted Eri) and appreciated that on the down low. It made him happy that he got to stay connected to the two teachers that respected him and helped him grow over all of these years, even though it was just through Hitoshi and his funny habit to call people in the very inconvenient places.

“Listen, I need to get some stuff from the store. I got this message, if you didn’t notice, Kirishima and Bakugou are coming back to Japan in a few weeks for Kirishima’s birthday. Maybe you could text our friends and plan a little reunion?”

“I did get the message, but- When did you get so considerate? I didn’t know that Hitoshi Shinsou had a heart?”

Hitoshi looked away quickly, grabbing a pair of boots from the shoebox and a coat from the hanger. He didn’t really know what Denki meant by the “not having a heart” thing and he didn’t know he was genuine about his. The old Shinsou wouldn’t care, but there was something in there that drove him to wonder if he was saying anything malicious. Was he being hurtful towards him or anything? He thought he had gotten better at it- he had even asked Yamada on how he could learn to be nice to loud blond extroverts. Well, the blond part wasn’t that relevant, but he still was the perfect person to teach him how to be nicer to his loud blond extroverted friend. Especially now that he lived with him, it was important that the two got along.

“Just shut up, will you? Study on your own, I’ll check you up on the second unit vocabulary when I come back.”

“Your wish is my command, Mr. Aizawa.” A slight rosiness found its place on Hitoshi’s cheeks as Denki joked. Damn, this guy could be flattering when he actually tried. The feeling of flattery, however, could easily turn into an inexplicable ache-like pain if he did stop thinking so much. He brushed the smile off of his face and turned away as he spoke, a sense of guilty and static happiness welling up inside of his abdomen. What the fuck was that supposed to mean?

“Ha-ha, very funny.”

The moment Ochako had come in, the pair had excused themselves and gotten to the dance floor in order to wear themselves out before getting a few drinks. Their invitation to the dance floor wasn’t very clear- and she was rightfully anxious about her decision, but she sort of wanted to give them space as well. They were a couple after all, it would be their night if Ochako had not come with them. But the fact that she had isolated herself had her feeling even more unsure of herself now. When Shoto had invited her, was he just being nice? Perhaps he was expecting her to decline the offer, seeing that she was very tired. Izuku seemed enthusiastic for her, though. What did that even mean? If understanding her friends was as easy as it was during high school, she would love to reclaim that confidence.

But what even was she doing there? At first, Ochako had tried to dance. She even found a few people to dance with, but they were mostly just drunk guys. Over the night, she found herself leaning closer and closer to the walls, where she could get some fresh air. When agony covered her, she grabbed a few drinks from the bar, trying to forget that awful feeling that she knew she would be finding herself in. Her insides would feel clenched as the shadow over her would blister her vision. Her abdomen would ache as well as that stabbing would feel coming over to her chest, choking her into a suffocation of doubt. She could hardly breathe, and it was displayed from every angle that she was hardly keeping her eyes from welling up. And Ochako’s mind had been bombarded with a lot of questions. Was she even queer? What was she doing there? Did she have to leave? As she couldn’t stop the tears from coming down, her vision was blocked, and her ears irritated with the simplest of sounds, and she couldn’t stop herself from questioning everything that was so, so wrong about the situation she was in. Did she deserve to be there? Was she spending her precious time? Would studying be much better than this?

Was she wasting her parents’ money again?

The thoughts had captured her mind, brought her down to the point where she could do anything to stop them from attacking her. It was so overwhelming, so unusual, yet she had been dealing with the same guilt for the years this mess. There was nothing she could do to stop herself from feeling this way, nothing unless she left this bar and-

“Ooooh, you’re pretty! Let’s dance.”

“I’m-

what?”

Ochako’s thought stream was interrupted by the sudden callout, which she had to take her time to process. Who was- I mean, she sort of had to expect random people talking her up at a club, since that was the whole point of clubs. She was just not expecting anymore than a few catcalls. Then again, these people were gay, they weren’t exactly the type to harass others, guess they sort of knew how it felt to be catcalled. But right when she felt as if there was no way to get out of her sudden miserable sensations, this girl had approached her. Ochako, her eyeliner ran all over her cheeks, she looked forward.

“You look sort of wretched, I like it.”

It took a bit to rub her eyes out but the moment she could look forward: Goddamn. Ochako could feel her jaw slightly moving at the sight of her luck. A fox-eyed, doll-like girl with twin buns. Ochako couldn’t even check her out very well before she smiled to herself, taking her eyes off of the other. What was this, amateur luck? The girl was pretty as hell, even in some uncanny way, she felt like she knew those amber eyes from before. The lady seemed to have an unchanging smirk plastered on her face, some sort of confidence, and clearly, she knew that she was lovely. Ochako could sense some sense of innocence from her, which clearly wasn’t the case with how self-assured she was, but again; was it her doll-like appearance that caused her to give off that energy? Either way, Ochako could feel her cheeks heat up. It was very apparent that she was interested. But hey- This was not the time, not at all. Her emotions were totally ruling over her anyways.

“I uhm, can’t dance, very sorry-”

“I’ll teach you, come ooon!”

With that, she could grab her hand and pull Ochako into the crowd back again. She had.. Nice hands. Soft and small, her grip was very firm for such fragile looking hands. Ochako felt that her hand’s heat was giving her away, but it didn’t really matter. She didn’t have to pretend that she wasn’t interested or anything. And oh boy, this place was squished as hell. At this point, Ochako’s go-to dance moves were simply her swaying in her place. She knew how to dance, she did that a lot back when she was actually confident in herself, but club-dancing was completely a foreign concept to her. She watched the other’s moves and tried to follow them, but stopped as soon as she was feeling like she was making a fool out of herself. The moment she felt hopeless, she instinctively opened her mouth to apologize, but something completely awkward slipped out instead.

“I’m not a lesbian!”

Stupid! Stupid Ochako, what was she even saying? She had panicked and spoken completely randomly. It was true, she wasn’t a lesbian, but you wouldn’t say that outright to a girl you met at a club. Luckily, the girl wasn’t drawn away, and she kept dancing.

“Neither am I.” She giggled before continuing her words. “But are you straight?”

This was where Ochako lagged. Was she straight? I mean, no one was keeping her there. She could literally stop dancing with the girl and leave the club. But she wasn’t doing that. Was there any reason? Who knew. Ochako had come to the conclusion that she wasn’t exactly against all of this, and maybe even into it? She never answered the question, but the other could clearly read from her face that the answer was ‘no’. She gave off yet another sly smirk before speaking again.

“Aww, how cute! I’m your first girlfriend?”

“Girlfriend?”

“You like me, I like you, we should definitely be girlfriends!”

Ochako remained quiet once again. This girl was eccentric, very much so, but she didn’t really seem to be uncomfortable with the way she was perceived. She seemed to have really embraced her weirdness, and it made her stand out from the crowd. Wasn’t that what Ochako saw in Izuku that made her develop a crush on him back when they were little? The way he would throw himself in situations without giving a fuck about what anyone thought of him? That boy might have broken every bone in his body while trying to get a sense of life inside of him. That same juvenile boldness was what laid inside the other’s eyes. Was that why she had that sudden feeling of familiarity when she first looked into her eyes? Without a word once again, Ochako was pulled closer to the girl she was dancing with. It was abrupt, unsolicited and brave for a girl she just met, but it wasn’t harsh. She was oddly gentle with her moves and didn’t touch her anywhere that could potentially trigger anything. Ochako found herself in a position where she was exactly similar to when her guilts and worries washed away back at that summer vacation. Was this.. a start of something new? Her trail of thought was cut off the moment a profuse yelp was heard from the distance, the gap slowly closing as the voice got louder.

“Ochako-chan! We’ve been looking for you everywhere! Let’s go!”

“Uh- what? What’s up, Izuku?”

“The police are arriving- someone’s been dealing drugs here and they got caught. Let’s flee!”

“Awh, no! But I had just found a girlfriend! Damn- all pigs really are bastards. What a bunch of killjoys.”

Ochako was still caught in the heat of the moment, frozen with confusion and shock as her dance partner spoke her frustration out. The girl didn’t didn’t seem that worried when she said that. It was as if she was used to getting busted in clubs, she was more upset about the fact that her fun was cut off. Huh, what an interesting night. What an interesting girl. Ochako, however, couldn’t give her up right here. She just couldn’t, she had to change her fate this time. She had to take this risk, every fiber in her body was telling her to. Her mouth was faster than her brain when it realised what it really wanted.

“Can I see you again?”

“Uraraka-san, quickly please.”

As Shoto called out for her, she held up her finger, as if to beg for their friends to wait for a second. Her eyes widened in her last moments. It could be read from her face that there was some sort of weakened light again. Weak, but it was there. As if she still had some hope left from her high school years, that innocent yet curious wonder that had never left. Perhaps, she just needed a change. She needed a transition for it to come back, and her hopes to see this girl again could be what she was looking for to recall herself. The girl’s sly smirk formed into something of an endearing one, and her eyes narrowed into Ochako’s eyes, she spoke,

“The name’s Himiko Toga. Come back to this club, and they’ll take you to me. Fly away, princess!” And suddenly, Ochako had the faintest hope that this wasn’t the last time she was seeing this girl.

“Mhm.. Shouta? What’s wrong?”

Hizashi’s eyes darted off of the bed, looking at the other man who was already getting dressed. What was wrong? It was what- 5AM? Why the hell was he even awake so early? He was used to his husband having nightmares in the middle of the night if he hadn’t been sleeping for a while and suddenly slept, but him actually getting up was rather rare, especially after so many years. He could only receive an exhausted sigh. “It was just a dream. I’ll get some fresh air and go to school early. I have uh.. Some papers to mark.”

“If it’s about Shirakumo or anything-”

Shouta slightly raised his voice as he cut the man off, hoping that it was clear he didn’t want to talk about it, especially not at 5AM in the fucking morning. “Can you dress Eri up and call Shinsou in the morning? I don’t want him to be worried that I didn’t answer his calls.”

“I- yeah.”

Hizashi just felt a bit choked up. But he didn’t say a word. He wanted to do what Shouta was telling him to do and if this was what he felt would make him feel better, then that’s what he would do. He laid back on his back, staring at the ceiling in realization that Shouta was falling back into his fears and that he had nothing he could do about it. He waited. But the other didn’t leave just yet. He gapped his lips, hoping that he would find the right words as he started off.

“I..love you, ‘zashi. A lot. I really do.” Shouta had never been good at this. As a kid too. He always wished he was. He remembered how Oboro and Hizashi would shamelessly report their love from each other and their friendship. Hizashi too would constantly tell Shouta that he loved him, and he didn’t expect a response from him to know that he was loved back, very much. He deserved an ‘I love you’ though, a vocal one. And there it was, sixteen years later.

“I know. I know. I love you too. I’m just-”

The door shut.

“ -worried about you.”

“Ahh! Himiko Toga, what a surprise.”

Himiko’s face sharpened, her usual sinister expression turning into something of a deadly one, one could easily point out that she looked almost out of her mind. Was that such an unexpected thing, now? She didn’t even bother to hide it, as people were naturally drawn to her pathology. Broken people, at least. And what would she even do with anyone that hadn’t gone a bit mad anyways? Moth to a flame, baby. As she heard her name, she stopped, and looked back over her shoulder. Who else could this be? Who else even bothered to talk to her anymore for any other reason than business? She had one friend that loved to bother her in the middle of expensive business, and she liked him a lot.

“I saw your little brother at the club today, the one with the scar? Why didn’t you tell me that he was a little cute?”

“Oh, yeah? What was he doing at a gay bar?”

Himiko raised an eyebrow. “Ask me what you really want to know.”

“Does he have a boyfriend or anything? Happy, is he like..healthy?”

“You worry about the little Todoroki Shoto? That is adorable, you.” She humorously faked a blush, even poking her cheeks with the same doll-like expression that she inhibited all this time she had spoken to Ochako. The guy she was talking to was a close friend, he could tell what was her making-pretend and what was how she actually felt. With the roll of his eye, she dropped the act and slouched a little before she replied. “Maybe. He was holding hands with this boy. He looked sorta, kinda, like a broccoli. Y’know, green bushy hair. I even got myself a girlfriend! She was a friend of his..”

“Does this girl know that she’s your girlfriend?”

Himiko chuckled once again. “She’ll come back to me, I just know it.”

“Whatever, crazy girl. One of Shigaraki’s minions got caught dealing there. Big Sis Magne is very angry.”

Himiko’s smile was dangerous. It wasn’t cold at all, but the way it carried so many different emotions all together was just properly overwhelming. You could tell by one look into her eyes that she was something big, something you would have to tolerate, and a rare few would gladly do. She shot one last glare at the man before turning her back once again, strolling in zigzags as she spoke, madness in her voice,

“Tell Big Sis Magne that Yakuza Toga is coming to help her. And I just looove helping people!”

With that, she had disappeared into the lone shadows of the alleyway.

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filthysweetie · 4 years

Text

00q drabble

Prompt: “You’re Satan.”

Day 19! January is going fast 😬 but i’ve only missed three days so far so that’s something! If anyone wants to send a prompt or pairing for tomorrow’s drabble feel free :)

————

Bond walks up with a smirk and Q immediately feels threatened. Not in the banal, traditional sense that anyone with half a mind would feel when faced with someone of Bond’s caliber. Oh no, Q was feeling quite threatened with the knowledge that whatever Bond was coming to tell him would not be something he wants to hear.

“Q.” Bond inclines his head in some play at respect.

No use putting it off; “Out with it, Bond.”

He slowly lifts his head, a smirk and a raised eyebrow already firmly in place, “Now what have I done to offend you, dear Quartermaster?”

“Whatever it is you’re about to tell me.”

“Well then I just won’t tell you—can’t have you mad at me before a mission’s even started.” He turns and starts to saunter away.

“This tactic?” Q makes a gesture to all that Bond is, “Isn’t working.”

“We shall see.” Bond inclines his head again and leaves Q branch.

Q follows him with his eyes narrowed until he’s truly out of sight before turning back to his work. What was he doing again? God, Bond can be such a distraction, even when he does nothing more than stop by. ——— So the thing is, Q has seen Bond is many situations. In fancy galas, in back alleys, in casual dress and formal. Bond is a spy, he makes every environment his home, blending in seamlessly.

But not here. Here he sticks out like the sorest of thumbs. Because here is his local Tesco where he’s popping in to get some more tea, cat food, and if he’s feeling adventurous, some digestives.

Bond doesn’t see him first (terribly spy) but he is the one that walks over, basket in hand. There’s a pepper and some apples in the basket. It’s weirder somehow than Bond being in his local Tesco in the first place.

“Fancy seeing you here.” Bond says, dispensing with the title in public but understandably having nothing to fill the blank space of his name with.

“I find myself equally surprised.” Q drawls, suddenly self-conscious of his three boxes of tea for reasons that are absolutely ridiculous, surely.

Bond smirks and it’s a smidge closer to a smile than Q’s seen directed at him before—although that could do with the soft looking sweater Bond’s wearing that seem to soften his edges.

“Well, can I say it without you getting mad now?” Bond asks into the brightly lit space between them and Q feels ambushed.

He says, hesitantly; “I can’t promise I won’t be mad.”

“Alright.” Bond takes a step back and Q finds himself leaning into the vacated air, “I’ll leave you to your shopping then.” He turns and walks away again and Q is rooted to the spot.

What kind of weird game is Bond playing? Q wants to call out after him, to demand whatever it is that made Bond walk so confidently into Q branch a half week ago. Q would never admit it, but it’s been tapping away at the corners of his mind like a persistent itch. Whatever game he’s playing though, Q wont let him win. ——— So Q is absolutely dying to know.

Of course Bond would be good at keeping things hidden and secret, he’s a bloody spy, but he’s never so blatantly kept something from Q before, and generally Q can figure out what it is easy enough. But this isn’t case related, far as he can tell, and it would be a bit preemptive to be asking for extra treats on his next mission. He’s been thinking about it since their last meeting, and it’s more annoying than the man himself.

Q might have to let Bond win.

So Q does something he didn’t think he’d ever do. He goes to the MI6 gym where all the people paid to be in shape work out like it’s their job. Which, technically...

God, of course Bond is shirtless, doing pull ups like he’s god’s gift to earth, looking fit as hell with the sheen of sweat that comes from hard work.

Q walks over and clears his throat, giving Bond an alert to his presence that the man certainly doesn’t need. Bond does three more pull ups before dropping down from the bar and into the space next to Q.

Damn it, the man even smells nice when sweaty. That’s just unfair.

“Whatever it is, I won’t be mad.” Q says and tries not to make it sound like he’s begging for cognitive closure.

Bond looks smug, of course he does, and takes a towel to the back of his neck, “Do you promise to say yes?”

Q notices a bead of sweat making its way down Bond’s chest because he is paid to be observant, “Say yes..?” Q does not physically shake his head to clear his thoughts but it’s close, “No, of course not!” He crosses his arms. Bond shrugs. Q never thought of the act of shrugging as sexual before this moment.

“Then I’ll see you around, dear Quartermaster.”

And he has the gaul to walk away. ——— So Q thought this was getting to him before? That was nothing. Now it was something of an active obsession. What in the world could Bond want to ask that he was requiring Q to say ‘yes’ to? It wasn’t gadgets—Bond had shamelessly requested a laser pointer with actual usable lasers just yesterday with no subterfuge. And it wasn’t time-bound, or he wouldn’t be so unconcerned with Q’s reluctance to give in to Bond’s ludicrous demands.

It was even starting to affect his sleep! Just last night he dreamt of their encounter in the grocery store—except this time Bond had been wearing what he had been at the gym, minds are just crazy and inexplicable like that—and just when his dream self was about to learn the secrets of the universe through Bond’s lips, Nikola had jumped on his stomach and woke him abruptly with a meow to the face.

So he was tired and quickly veering towards wired if he had more more coffee (the vice of those without adequate sleep) when Bond again comes into Q branch, looking calm and collected and unbothered. Which of course makes Q very Bothered.

“007, my office if you would.” Q says across the five desks between them and walks determinedly to his office from the center podium he prefers. Bond enters a moment later, closing the door softly behind him, that infuriating little smile on his face.

“Yes Q?”

Q closes his eyes for a moment and rubs his temple, “Alright, I give up, out with it.” He looks at Bond and almost makes a physical grabbing motion.

“Oh?” Bond leans against the door, “And do you promise not to be mad?”

“Yes, yes.” Q motions for Bond to get on with it already.

“And you promise to say yes?”

Q bites his lip for a moment, “fine, I do.”

Bond smiles wide before taking a step closer, “May I take you to dinner, dear Quartermaster?”

Q’s jaw goes slack, “You’re Satan.” It comes out as the incredulous exclamation it is.

“Remember, you promised to say yes.” Bond teases, leaning just a bit closer.

Q huffs and ignores his reddened cheeks, “7 tonight, and nothing too fancy, I’m not changing.”

“As you wish.” Bond takes a step back and inclines his head in deference and it only makes Q blush harder. He turns to go.

“Oh for fucks sake,” Q exclaims and Bond turns back only to be pulled into an absolutely filthy kiss, if Q says so himself. They part and Q is quite satisfied with the bits of surprise peppering Bond’s face.

“Don’t be late.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

#00q #00q fic #james bond #q #drabble on #i fancy myself a writer

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holycowbrowniekitty · 4 years

Link

Norwegian Ingrid is imprisoned in Japan for a crime she did not commit

Original text in Norwegian by Stian Smakic Sopp was published with the consent of the family. It has been slightly modified during translation to fit this format.Stian has now provided with his own translation in the original post: https://www.facebook.com/soppp/posts/10162553924190366

Norwegian student Ingrid from Ålgård in Rogaland was arrested by the Japanese authorities and is currently in detention for crimes she has not committed, without any incriminating proof against her case, and under brutal conditions that are human rights violating.

Her friend “Alexandra” was also put under similar conditions, but has been released. “Alexandra” describes her experiences as torture and highly traumatizing.

Ingrid is a master student of Global Environment Studies at Sophia University in Tokyo, Japan. Ingrid is a good-hearted girl who loves people, animals and the environment, and she loves Japan. She has a pet parakeet and insects who means the world to her, and is currently writing her master’s thesis about the importance of the insects in our environment. She is not one to be sarcastic, as she worries about hurting people’s feelings, but she has the brightest smile. Ingrid also has autism.

Please donate if you can! For those who don’t know, the justice system in Japan is terrible and abusive, especially to those who are deemed “smugglers”.

More information on the actual events + the system beneath the cut.

What happened?

March 2019

Ingrid reached out to Association of Norwegian Students Abroad (hereby; ANSA) and asked if she could meet a representative to talk. I (author Stian) met Ingrid, and we had lunch together and stayed in touch with her frequently on Facebook from this point on. Ingrid told me she wanted to expand her network and get more friends. I gave her a list of organizations, clubs and networks I deemed it positive for her to be a part of, as well as encouraging her to join in on ANSA events so we could stay in touch. Ingrid joined these events from this point on. My wish was for her to join as a board member, but she doubted her capabilities for such a task. I told her that in ANSA we all support each other, and that there would never be a task we couldn’t conquer together.

8th November 2019

ANSA’s board meeting is held, and Ingrid is elected as a board member. In the following days a meeting to get to know each other is planned and decided through a poll in our private Facebook group.

22nd November 2019

The first board meeting is held, but Ingrid never showed. She had not been a part of the discussion in the previous days, and no one heard anything from her in the following days either. I thought she might have pulled back because the responsibilities seemed overwhelming on her, and I decided to give her a few days before I messaged her again to give her some space.

26th November 2019

I woke up to se a long message on my screen from a person not in my Facebook-contacts, but I recognized the surname. It was the same as Ingrid’s. In the message, it said that Ingrid had been arrested by the police.

Ingrid has a friend in Japan, “Alexandra”.

April 2019

A parcel for “Alexandra” from abroad reaches the Japanese customs. They claimed it contained marijuana. Neither the parcel nor information about it has been passed on to us at this point.

Shortly after this, “Alexandra” travels to her home country on a vacation. She was still not stopped by the authorities at this point.

12th November 2019

“Alexandra” returns to Japan. When she arrives at the airport she is arrested, and she describes the conditions as brutal and ruthless, and claims the authorities destroyed most of her possessions when they ransacked her bags. They found nothing, but they still sent her to detention.

She describes the conditions during her detention as follows:

The cell was about 6m2 in total, where they would keep up to four people at the same time. It was so cold that the only way they could stay warm was by walking around in the room. She lost 5,5kg during this period. She was allowed to shower once every five days. You slept on the floor. Wakeup-time was at 6:00am.

Every time there was a questioning, she was dragged by two policemen who each had a strap that was fastened in a belt “Alexandra” had to wear into the interrogation room, and if she could not keep up with them, they would pull the straps so hard that she would be pained by it.

The questionings happened up to three times a day, where each session would last several hours on end. The belt, which “Alexandra” describes as a torture device, was tightened so hard that she had troubles breathing. With what little breath she had, she told the officers interrogating her that the belt was fastened too tightly and that she couldn’t breathe, where the response was “too bad for you” or a similarly, as they fastened the belt even more if they felt like it. She was handcuffed so tightly she got cuts on her hands.

Verbal humiliation was also practiced.

At times she was also locked inside a small box she describes as claustrophobic and especially traumatizing.

If the detainees screamed in pain or cried, they would be put in solitary confinement.

After her release, the smell of the detergent used on the prison clothes gives her such a strong reaction that she vomits.

The authorities confiscated her phone and computer. There was never found any transaction log, communication log, order log or anything else that could be related to a parcel from the USA containing narcotic drugs.

20th November 2019

After 8 days of detention, “Alexandra” is released after receiving threats from the police about telling about her experiences in their detention. The same day, Ingrid is arrested.

22nd November 2019

The family is informed about the arrest by the Norwegian Embassy

26th November 2019

I am informed by Ingrid’s sister about her situation

29th November 2019

The authorities decided to hold Ingrid for another 10 days

Because of the legal and formal restrictions, we have not been allowed to publish this sooner. Through Ingrid’s lawyer, we have been told that Ingrid is crying a lot, but no more than that, even if we ask. Her family has expressed that she absolutely is not capable of going through such an experience given her mental state, and it has a potential of inflicting her with irreversible damage.

Japanese police and justice system has been criticized for years for being very corrupt, for it’s irresponsible practice and for systematically violating the human rights. These complaints come from human rights organizations, activists, law professors, radio and TV stations, researchers, psychologists, doctors, newspapers, previous convicts who have later been proven innocent and those previously employed in the police force and justice system.

Japan claims to solve 99,9% of all criminal cases, something they are very proud of. However, the system never admits fault and system errors. The most common practice in the system is “Forced Confession”, where they force the detained to confess to have committed the crime they are accused for. The more one denies, the more and harder one will get punished.

If the police are unsuccessful in this, they will prolong the detention, something they can do in up to 23 days even without evidence, before they will have to release you if they don’t have any proof.

When you are released, it is common practice that the police will immediately detain you once more, and accuse you with something similar. For example, if you were first accused for “import of drugs”, the next on might be “participation in import of drugs”, the third “national threat of dangerous expressions related to drugs” and so on. They do not need any evidence to do this. Usually, this goes on until the detained breaks during questioning and admits to crimes they didn’t commit, just to escape from the torturous environment. This confession is brought to court, where the accused get their judgement. There is no need for evidence as this point to convict you of this crime.

For every criminal case in Japan, typically at least one person will always be charged. This is to “resolve” the case.

What we know about Ingrid at this point is that she is not allowed to communicate with anyone but her lawyer. This lawyer was appointed to her by the police that detained her. According a European translator who has worked as a translator during several Japanese questionings, these lawyers are often without experience regarding criminal law. They are used purely symbolically to say you are allowed to have a lawyer, but in practice they have little to no influence as criminal defense lawyers, and are in several cases influenced by the police.

Normal practice at Japanese workplaces are preferably to follow the system without asking questions. In this case, with the police, an authoritarian hierarchy with physical, verbal and mental harassment is normalized and allowed if the orders come from the higher ups, and the public are held out of the know.

Furthermore, when you’re in a Japanese prison, it doesn’t matter if you have been convicted of something you committed or not. You are treated without respect, and under extreme conditions.

To this point, there has not been found any evidence to testify that Ingrid imported drugs to Japan. But because there are only two people involved in the case and the police are prolonging her detention, there is a possibility Ingrid will become the one the police intend to charge in this case.

Questions you might have at this point:

Isn’t Japan a civilized and developed country with high standards?

With all due respect to Japan and it’s population, this sadly is not the case on certain points. Crimes are statistically low, mainly because most criminal activity happens in the underground between gangs, and not to civilians in public. But innocent people are convicted every day here, and sadly Japan operates with systems that are technologically outdated, and an abuse of power. Our communication with Ingrid is exclusively through the lawyer that relays our messages to the police, which is only available through fax. E-mail and phone conversations are not available.

The Japanese justice system operates exclusively with judges and never with a jury. The mentality is to get a case solved as quick as possible, without much consideration to the justice. Judges are promoted based on how quick they can solve cases, without regard for the quality. This pressure creates and illusion that every case is investigated and solved correctly.

How serious is this?

Of all things, a drug conviction is one of the things Japan is the strictest about. The penalty is high for little, and if a case is first created, even if there was never any evidence from the start, practice is that at least one is convicted.

Can’t Foreign Affairs or the Embassy do something?

No. The police are legally responsible for Ingrid, so neither embassy nor any other organization can do anything legally. The Embassy can first open diplomatic negotiations when a person is convicted. However, there is no guarantee these will succeed, and Ingrid can risk several years of imprisonment for a crime she never committed. As of current, me and the family are in dialogue with the Norwegian embassy.

How can we know she is not guilty of what she’s been charged for?

Ingrid’s test results for drugs have not tested positively. No log exist that can verify any order, communication or anything else that indicate any request of such a package. The only “evidence” the police has is a parcel they claim was sent to “Alexandra”, even without her request to have it sent. Ingrid is detained for being a friend of “Alexandra”. ¨

Ingrid does not consume alcohol, tobacco, nicotine or narcotics, and has never done this previously. She has never had any friends or contacts within any criminal networks. According to her family, she is a person that has never wanted to or been in trouble, and could never challenge the law or other organizations, whether it be formally or informally. The family also claims Ingrid takes distance from drugs and other substances such as tobacco etc. and has done so her entire life.

Personally, Ingrid is the last person who could have done something like this out of everyone I know.

Another important thing to notice is that the autism diagnosis is not very well known in the Japanese society, comparatively to the west. A large portion of the population here, professionals and non-professionals alike don’t know the diagnose and its behavioral spectrum, and Japan is even known to treat most diagnoses chemically, for example is autism often treated by “Happy Spray”.

Ingrid has a different body language from most people, for example she gets easily shy and uncomfortable when it comes to direct eye-contact. We believe this to be much of the reason the authorities are keeping her, and that they are using her as bait.

What can we do?

From the family, and for me as Ingrid’s friend, we ask you on the deepest to share this. From activists, journalists, organizations and others that have previously been involved in similar cases have we been advised two things: to acquire a good, private and independent lawyer with good knowledge on criminal justice, and publish about this in social media and the newspapers. Our hope is that Ingrid’s case can get enough attention in social media and news media, so we can bring this to Japanese media and explain that this is an important case for those of us at home, and that people from all places care about these things, and we hope they will write about this. The consequences of the Japanese media writing about this can potentially have a huge influence and result in Ingrid’s freedom. We hope to get media on our side, so the authorities will be pressured to negotiate.

We have created a crowdfunding-page to finance a lawyer to defend Ingrid, since this will cost us several thousand kroner every hour (10kr is roughly 1$ or 100yen). In this case, the family will be able to communicate with the lawyer directly in English, as the current lawyer only speaks Japanese. We wish to document where the money went in the aftermath as a testament to our gratitude, and to testify that this money was not spent on anything else.

The police and the lawyer in Japan have denied documents sent by Ingrid’s father who is a docent at University of Stavanger where he teaches purchasing and contract law, with an education in law and trade. In these documents he also refers the international purchasing law, which both the country of origin of the parcel, Norway and Japan is a part of, and the father of Ingrid deems it irresponsible to accuse two people who have no knowledge of the sending of this parcel, when the police doesn’t have any other incriminating proof. This is also a human rights violation.

I have expressed a wish to support Ingrid’s family, in hopes that my social network can help to reach out with this story to any persons, politicians, institutions and others that might be willing to help, and that we from there could give this case bigger attention. At least this is my hope.

Ingrid’s detention has been prolonged for ten more days from November 30th 2019. According to her lawyer, it is likely that this process will continue for a long time coming, where they in practice will prolong the detainment for months in sequences of 23 days (10+10+3). He further expresses that Ingrid is risking at least 5 years in prison.

Ingrid has no knowledge of that there are people on the outside working day and night to help her, since we cannot reach her and have personal information relayed. All the family wants right now is for Ingrid to be treated fairly, and for her to come home from Christmas safe and sound.

We therefore ask you humbly to share this message, and hope as many as possible will be able to crowdfund a lawyer for Ingrid. All resources will be greatly appreciated.

I have included some sources to describe the conditions told about in the text. From both Ingrid’s family and me, thank you so much for taking your time reading this!

Crowdfunding:

https://www.gofundme.com/f/aprep-ingrid?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=m_pd+share-sheet&fbclid=IwAR0rVTZb3Qe0SYiG7XrovPxG0H8KZEi20UStIIlD-C3Q_-lsM0vHpQpCU9Y

Guilty until proven innocent: A documentary about the Japanese justice system and its dark side

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYJpc2y37oU&fbclid=IwAR3GaGkFYltVO1D2soHQ_IIHaQnvz5AplmhcFLai4B0nnaQVcFc0hQva7Sw

Why Japan’s conviction rate is 99% | The Economist

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFINmgSzK6E&t=0s&fbclid=IwAR06RgwVlOOd6vMYEtco9whVUs9bvKjMj9skUczh7vwBbJE9o50h-SVJXeA

Research articles describing the interrogation process in Japan:

https://www.researchgate.net/publication/282617040_Japanese_Interrogation_Techniques_From_Prisoners'_Perspectives?fbclid=IwAR05ei4olZs7fPgweIbM6xLEbWMMos4FfJpMnFGUa02XK0Om2l8Pxtk3yCE

#fundraiser #crowdfunding #help #donations #signal boost #donation post #japan #prison #weed #even the smallest of smallest donations are welcome

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