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sacrificesapnap · 1 year

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My all-time favourite DNF fanfiction

Over the last year and a half, I have read almost every single DNF fic that has been posted to AO3, yet ended up with a rec list with just over 10 fics. These are my favourite favourite DNF fics. If you think I’ve missed something - let me know!! I always need new fanfic to read :)

This list will be updated when I find something that I think deserves a top spot. Please make sure you read tags before reading, because a lot of these will have adult content and other possibly triggering subjects. I hope you enjoy!

Heat Waves by tbhyourelame

Word count : 51,840

Dream has always held a gentle admiration for George, but when their nuanced friendship trickles into his sleeping mind, he awakens to a new world of conflicting emotions and longing. Lost in the midst of a heat wave, he continuously listens to a song that works itself in to the very core of his heartache. Floridian nights, unsent messages, spiraling infatuation, and terrible, terrible weather.

This is an obvious recommendation but how could I actually make a fic rec list without putting heatwaves on it. It has great characterisation, a lot of the plot is true to real life or close to real life, and it has a painfully accurate amount of overthinking and pining. Heatwaves itself is finished, however the sequel Helium is a WIP, which the author has said they currently have no plans of finishing. Either way, it’s well worth reading, and a must-read to anyone new to the fandom or new to reading fics.

When by hayloftown

Word count : 163,493

Trust doesn't come easily, but fear does. Dream was dealt a bad hand, who can blame him for his hostility? Or, in which Dream comes from a bad background and finds safety in a new home. Whether that "home" be the place or the people, he is unsure.

God, hayloftown’s fics are incredible. I am not joking when I tell you I have never cried more at a book or fanfic EVER. It was devastating. That being said I literally had to read it in one sitting. This fic describes complex emotions, feelings and especially bonds between people incredibly, and it is so enjoyable to watch dream’s character develop throughout. I actually felt hollow after reading this, because by the end I loved all the characters so much I never wanted it to end. This fic has some pretty heavy themes, so please read tags before reading this one.

Stars, Stripes and Aristocratic Snobs by hayloftown

Word count : 122,536

Even hundreds of years since their historical wars over independence, American politics and British royalty still struggle to get along, as seen in the rivalry between first son Clay “Dream” Chapman and Prince George of Wales. After a week long trip to the UK after the "tragic" passing of Prince Charles, the successor to the throne and Prince George's father, the two are forced to get along and put forth a better front for the ever-present media.

It’s only fair to have two works by hayloftown on this list, because they are both favourites of mine. I am such a sucker for royalty au’s (prepare to lots more on this list) so this was perfect to me. The summary says everything you need to know about this fic, so I won’t say too much, but I really enjoyed George and Dream’s dynamic in this fic, and I’m a slut for george in a position of power (sorry not sorry).

I’ve Never Fallen From Quite This High by Scoops (consciousness_streaming)

Word count : 92,419

A phone call out of the blue after two months in Florida turns George's life up side down. As one relationship falls apart, another falls together.

This fic is soooo good. Without spoiling too much, George deals with his parents’ relationship problems whilst developing a relationship with dream (I’m telling you this because I had this in my marked for later for ages and I didn’t read it because I was scared the aforementioned relationship that was falling apart was karlnap lol). If you love family dynamics and domestic fluff this is a must read. George’s mum is the main character in this honestly she’s such an icon, but I just love the dynamic between all the characters in this. 10/10 would recommend.

The mon cœur s'ouvre à ta voix series by saintaches

Word count : 108,775 across three works

Dream and George attend the same prestigious conservatoire, and they fucking hate each other.

I will admit that I originally clicked on this fic for the porn. However, after reading the plot that came with the porn, it turned into one of my favourite fics ever. It’s so beautifully written, a bit purple prosey at times, and is honestly art in writing form. Honestly parts of these works are a little devastating, but its worth it for the development of both dream and George individually and their relationship.

Metanoia by 24notfound

Word count : 246,211

Following the death of Queen of Salacia, George is thrown into kingship. And in reluctantly preparing for an indefinite war on the account of avenging his mother, George's vision seems to get blurred by the unlikely and unexpected bond he forms with the Prince of Vulcan: Dream.

Honestly this is just the perfect fantasy dnf fic, combining royalty and war with elemental powers. Aside from all the family dynamics and dnf’s actual relationship, the two things that I loved the most in this fic were the relationship between George, Karl and Quackity and their wonderful outfit’s and parties. Another perfect work.

as for praise and worship by squigly

Word count : 121,006

George is a detective working for Scotland Yard investigating a string of art thefts linked to grisly murders. Dream is a gambler who knows more than he lets on. They can't stay away from each other, even when they should.

This is such a wonderful plot heavy story, and the way squigly created this world and developed the story around Dream and George’s characters will have you gripped from the first chapter. Honestly, this story deserves to be published as a novel, it just has such an immersive and exciting storyline that I have no doubt you will read this in one setting (just like I did).

for you, the stars by andthentheybow

Word count : 115,149

There is exactly one person in the entire universe that knows Doctor George Davidson is alive, and that’s George himself. Even with everything against him- starvation, damaged machinery, the environment, and human error- he’s determined to not become the first person to die on Mars. And once they find out he’s alive, his crew resolves to do everything they can to bring him home.

When I first read the description for this fic I was not expecting to love it as much as I do simply because the situation is so far removed from both cc!dnf and c!dnf that it didn’t feel like it would work. However, their characters in this are so true to real life, and the astronauts have to face publicity and pressure from the public. I love this because I feel like georges intelligence gets lost all the time in fanfiction, but hes appreciated in all his genius glory here, pure bamf George through and through. Good bit of angst and pining, a side of karlnap, and really funny roles for a lot of the other smp members, this is just a really enjoyable read.

Reflections by darlingsdream

Word count : 128,341

In which Dream is assigned as Prince George's new personal guard and finds that it is surprisingly easy to fall for the royal with the spunky attitude but incredibly hard to keep his secrets from him.

This is a perfect Prince!George / Knight!Dream story. It has lots of plot twists and angst but its worth it for such a good story. If you love fantasy or the dynamic between princes and their guard, you will love this. I need to reread this asap tbh.

cinnamon and swirl by offday

Word count : 83,327

Sapnap stays quiet a moment, and while Dream sniffles, the little girl in his lap turns, taps against his face like the tears are common. Dream kisses at her hand, promises her he is okay. He acts like nothing is wrong. Like Sapnap isn’t crying in front of him too, when he should be scolding Dream.

“Why didn’t you?” Sapnap asks as he swipes the back of his hand over his nose. “I mean, not even George?”

Dream decides to tell his friends about his daughter right before they move in.

This is hands down the best DNF kid fic ever!! For some reason, I much prefer kid fics where one person is a single parent and the other person joins them later on. This fic is just perfect. I love that it’s not an AU (other than the fact dream is a dad), I live for uncle Sapnap and dreamnap’s friendship and I would die for protective dad!dream like that’s so attractive are you kidding me. I don’t care if you don’t normally like kid fics, read this now!!

Protected by Anonymous

Word Count : 102,200

Dream is the Crown Prince and the future king. His sworn duty is to protect his kingdom from outside threats, especially from the scourge of magic.

George is his best friend and, technically, his servant. And he has a secret.

I wish the author of this fic would reveal themselves because I would die to read more of their work. Anyway. I love this so so much. It’s a merlin AU fic where George has magic in a kingdom where magic is banned. Another great one for anyone that likes royalty au’s and once again it has a healthy amount of pining and angst all mixed in with fluff and fantasy and ugh I love it. A lot of fantasy fics are heavy on dream protecting George but I love the dynamic in this where magic George is secretly protecting dream and saving his life. To be honest this fic lives in my head rent-free sometimes. Even if you think this won’t be your cup of tea please just give it a try because it’s so good!

#dnf fic #dnf #dnf fanfic #dreamnotfound #dreamnotfound fic #dnf fic recs #fic recs #dsmp #mcyt #georgenotfound #dream #dreamwastaken #dnf ao3 #this feels like a piece of my soul

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storytellingdreamer · 1 year

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Star Wars Feels: Rogue One edition

My partner and I decided last year that after Andor finished, we’d watch Rogue One and then the Original Trilogy movies. The holiday period meant we had to hold that thought, but we started it tonight. For the next four weeks, we’ll be watching them on Saturday evenings.

Tonight was Rogue One. I watched this for the first time a few years ago and it still holds up so well. I love it to pieces, which is a highly unusual thing for me to say about a movie where all the main characters die by the end of it!

SO MANY feels.

This is my second watch. It means I can pay more attention to the different layers instead of getting swamped by them.

Cassian and Jyn, from Jedha onwards, lean into each other - they pick up each other's lines and support each other's actions. It's why Cassian's (almost) betrayal on Eadu hurts so much for both of them. I love them both so much. The way they start apart, with walls up, then slowly (and then very quickly) the walls crumble, until suddenly: “I’m not used to people sticking around...” and “Welcome home.” Before of course, the finish: “Your father would be proud.”

And the family these two build around them along the way.

Bodhi. Bodhi, Bodhi, Bodhi. The way he grows in confidence across the film but especially from Yavin IV onwards (it started at Eadu but Cassian's betrayal meant there was a setback, effectively). I love him.

Baze and Chirrut are another gorgeous pair, and I love how well matched they are. The cynic and the dreamer. The protector and the believer. Totally bad arse. A love story, whether you read them as romantic or besties, brothers or QPPs.

I love all of them.

Also, the roles of Guerra and Mothma and Bail Organa and the politics and all of that - it’s so good. My partner wants a Saw Guerra TV series now. I agree. He’s such a complicated, tragic character.

My favourite Mothma moment is the little smile she gives when told the Rogue One team are on Scarif. And my favourite Bail moment is of course the one where he talks of going back to Alderaan (noooooooooo) and he’ll send a messenger to his old friend - “I’d trust her with my life.”

Moving on.

I love the score. I adore it. The music is just -!!

The real genius of Rogue One is that (whether by accident or on purpose) it hasn’t forgotten its roots. This Tumblr post explains what I mean by that. This affects the pacing, the way scenes are cut together, the different POVs of each battle, and more. It works so well.

Quoting that Tumblr post:

There’s a moment some time during the third act when every viewer realizes, “Oh wow, this is actually how things are going down. I suddenly know how this movie is going to end, and yet I can’t believe they’re really doing this. Are they really going to let a Star Wars movie end like this?”

You know, basically from when they shut the gate, that it's now a suicide mission; the plan changes from "retrieve plans" to "send plans", and their chances of survival are not good.

(There have been powerful moments in the battle before this, of course - for example, the feeling of visible joy on Blue Leader and the Rogue One ground team's faces when BL comes to the rescue of some is just -!!)

But this sense of inevitability persists throughout the rest of the film with a growing dread, disbelief, and awe.

There's the struggle to send the plans, with the main character sacrifices falling, and the moment of terrible triumph where Admiral Raddus's plan sends the shield gate open - but almost immediately, it's swamped by the overwhelming sense of the oncoming storm - the music turning dark, and ominous, and sombre.

And the last 2-5 minutes of the film still punch me right in the gut.

Those last five minutes are a real case study in "on and on until every chance is spent" - the race against time, the awesome (terrible) power of the Death Star, followed by the terror of Vader.

And then. AND THEN.

"Your highness... what's this they've brought us?"

"Hope."

It destroys me.

That’s the theme of Star Wars, you see: that there is hope, and light, even in the most unlikely places. If we choose to act on it.

I can’t wait for next Saturday and A New Hope.

Luckily this is also coming at a time when I’m getting my mojo back about the Seize the Light fic - I’m hoping that watching the films continue to help with that.

#star wars #rogue one #star wars feels #hope #rebellions are built on hope #jyn erso #cassian andor #bodhi rook #baze malbus #chirrut imwe #leia organa

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im-not-here-im-dead · 2 years

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hmm let's go with... Toriel? for the analysis thingy? :P

(also very tempted to ask about Berdly- and also asgore but-)

ask game

I’ll do Toriel first !

My overall opinion on the character:

Someone pleeeeease get this woman some therapy please stars I am begging you !

Okay but in all seriousness she goes through a whole heckin’ lot (and no one talks about it ???) like, she losses her kids, her husband starts a war she knows they can’t win without so much as consulting her (not to mention the possibility that the both of them could have lived through the previous war), she decides to flee to the ruins where she is almost completely isolated for who-knows-how-long, she develops a binge-drinking problem, she ends up losing six more children!!! And she does all that she possibly can (in her mind) to avoid losing a seventh. She’s even willing to sacrifice her life so Frisk can have a way to go home. I can only imagine how betrayed, how guilty, how miserable, and how hopeless she must have felt going through all that. She tries so so hard and still fails. Still makes mistakes. Still grieves the loss of eight children that she could have protected if only she was a little more watchful, or strict, or whatever. And I think that’s why she acts the way she does with Frisk. I think she’s a very complicated and tragic character (which I appreciate greatly) and I really hope that she gets a chance to heal from all the extremely traumatic things she’s gone through. And I trust that she will.

One virtue they have:

She’s just. Really freaking strong! Like in general. She’s a really determined and resilient person despite having gone through so much. It feels a bit… odd? to praise her for something that she had to be in order to survive/cope (I know I feel that way about a lot of my own attributes) but it’s something about her that I admire a lot.

One flaw they have:

She can be really strong-willed. For better or for worse. I think it was a major detriment to her during her time in the ruins, and I think it’s most evident when we try to leave the ruins. If she’d been more flexible or impartial, things might’ve gone down differently, but that’s not what happened. I don’t know how much of her rigid thinking can be attributed to personal flaw or maladaptive coping mechanisms, but either way, it’s something that she’s gonna have to work through. I dunno what else to say. This isn’t something that I’ve thought about a lot tbh.

Favorite moment from their arc:

I think in those moments between when we leave her in the ruins and when we see her again in the true pacifist route is where she truly shines the most. I could talk about this all day (if given the energy) but I think this post sums it up better than I could.

Least favorite moment from their arc:

The scene where she confronts Asgore in the true pacifist route -_-

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t exactly dislike that scene. For what it’s worth, it is funny. But that’s the problem. I think it would have been so much better if it had been a more serious and emotional scene and it could have really shown just how tragic their estrangement was. How they once loved each other more than life, and now they can hardly bear to look at each other. I also think there would have been less mischaracterization of the two in fan works with Asgore being overly clingy and Toriel being overly mean-spirited if things had been done differently. But oh well. It’s not like you can change canon anyway. That’s what fanfic is for after all ;}

One relationship they have with another character:

Her friendship with Sans makes me melt TvT

They just click so well with each other. And I think, in a way, they’re kind of what the other needs. A companion they can confide in and share a good laugh with and a reason to keep going/get better. They’re so. Great. They’re great. Their interactions are so wonderful to hear about. I think they should start a prank war. They would absolutely start a prank war.

One relationship I’d like to see explored with this character

I’d like to see more of her and Flowey! He obviously cares about her at least somewhat. Maybe she’ll eventually find out who he used to be, or maybe she never will. Either way, things will never be the same between them, but I’d really like it if they started to form a new sort of mother-son relationship. Mostly I wanna see all the twists and turns and things that their dynamic takes.

What I would have liked to see happen with them in the media

Honestly, I just wanna see her. I wanna see her being happy and being herself. I think she deserves that.

I’m gonna put the other two under the cut :]

Next up, Berdly !

My overall opinion on the character:

When I first got into deltarune, I unfortunately jumped on the bandwagon trend of hating him for no reason ☠️

But that changed soon after chapter 2 came out. I think he’s a really fun, delightfully obnoxious, and surprisingly relatable character. What more can I say? He’s like a little brother to me :>

One virtue they have:

He really cares deep down. We see it in the neutral route where he overrides Queen’s mind-control and fries his wing to save his friends. We see it in the weird route when he drops the act and puts himself on the line the moment he notices that Noelle is truly in grave danger. If we squint, we can see it in every route when he talks about and interacts with Noelle. Sure he’s extremely annoying about it a lot of the time (most of the time actually) but he really does care about her a lot. He cares.

One flaw they have:

He’s really self-centered. I don’t necessarily mean in the self-important way. I mean in the has-a-hard-time-taking-other-peoples-perspectives-into-account kind of way. He frequently talks over Noelle. His rivalry with Kris seems to be pretty one-sided. He’s at least partially aware that Queen does not want him around and still tries to kiss up to her anyway. Instead of asking people what they think, he assumes based on his own narrow frame of reference, which causes him to have a lot of very awkward and unpleasant interactions. It seems to put a lot of strain on his friendship with Noelle as well. To me he seems like what a younger Papyrus who never got proper support might have been like :( Let’s hope he’ll learn some gosh dang communication skills! But for now, I suppose we can appreciate the character development he’s gotten so far.

Favorite moment from their arc:

I think the bluebird of misfortune sequence was really. Yeah. I didn’t know what to make of it at first, but now when I look back on it, it’s such a sincere moment of vulnerability and accountability. Course, he still has a lot to learn and things to work on, but it’s a start. I’m really proud of him for opening up like that. That takes guts.

Least favorite moment from their arc:

“If I can’t base my entire identity around being smart anymore, I guess now I’ll base my entire identity around being stupid!”

Buddy. My dude. My guy. You missed the whole friggin point !!!

Well, I guess I can’t expect him to do a whole one-eighty just like that. But still. Urrg! I think it’s another one of those moments where I feel like it might have been a lot better if it was taken more seriously instead of being unnecessarily played for laughs, but it’s fine. It’s fine and it’s funny! Aaah!

One relationship they have with another character:

His friendship with Noelle is so… ;-;

They study together. They play video games together. They feel like they can be the most themselves around each other. They’re terrified of letting each other down. They’re attached at the hip. They drive each other insane. They’re inseparable. They care about each other so much and they’re always there for each other no matter what. They’re besties.

One relationship I’d like to see explored with this character:

I’d say him and Kris, but that’s too easy. I’d like to talk about him and Susie! I think they have a lot in common. They would absolutely be the kind of friends who are constantly (playfully) butting heads and roasting each other. They know it’s all in good fun, but maybe once in a while, one of them might go a bit too far and the other would lash out and they’d both feel really crappy about it, but they’ll make amends. They always do, and their friendship grows stronger for it. They also would do a bunch of ridiculous daredevil stuff together. Sometimes Kris joins if they feel like it. It’s hard to say whether Noelle or Toriel has gotten more gray hairs from these two heeheehee

What I would have liked to see happen with them in the media:

I wanna see him let loose! I wanna see him just being a kid and not feeling like he needs to put up a front all the time. I want him to be able to just relax and have a good time. I want him to take a freaking nap.

And last but not least, Asgore !

My overall opinion on the character:

I think Asgore’s story is a heart-wrenching one that is (besides the one scene) wonderfully written, and one that is sadly under-appreciated. My feelings about Asgore himself are a wee bit complicated, which makes sense as he is a complicated individual. To put it briefly, he makes me feel a lot of feelings, and I mean A Lot. He’s a guy with a big heart who went through tragedy after tragedy and a kind ruler who cares so so so much and that’s exactly what led him to do awful things that I can’t ignore even if I wanted to. He loves flowers. And gardening. And tea, and puns, and floral-patterned shirts. He’s gentle and patient and soft-spoken. He’s such a goddamn pushover. He’s worryingly prone to denial. He’s so painfully self-aware to the point of self loathing. He’s a misguided and incredibly traumatized old man who wants only the best for those he cares about and thinks only the worst of himself. He did every single bad thing that he did, and he is not a ‘bad person’. I care about him a whole dang lot. I guess cause a lot of what he goes through hits surprisingly close to home. Not everything of course, but some things. Particularly feelings of profound hopelessness and self-hatred. In my mind, if there’s hope for him, and there is, then there’s gotta be hope for me too, right? And that means a lot to me.

One virtue they have:

His tender-heartedness. He regularly visits his people. Teaching kids how to take care of flowers, dressing up as Santa for Gyftmas, giving his friends cups that look like them, things like that. He gets nicknames like ‘King Fluffyboy’ and ‘Big Fuzzy Pushover’ without any kind of animosity behind them. In a no mercy run, when faced with an entity who will most certainly end his life, he offers them tea. And in a neutral run, when spared by the person who brought him to his knees, he offers them a place in his home. Beneath all the terrible decisions he has made and the tragedies he has endured, he really is a big softie with a big heart, and that’s what I appreciate most about him. Complexities.

One flaw they have:

While Toriel is strong-willed to a fault, I think that Asgore’s fatal flaw is his passiveness which stems from his indecisiveness. When he finds himself in a difficult situation, he’s paralyzed by his doubt and apprehension. And he just. lets things happen. Even when the world is ending, he remains in standstill. To be fair, the situation he’s put himself in is a very difficult one, to put it mildly. He’s working with what he has. I highly doubt I would have done better in his place. Sure, he might have handled things better in theory, but, well… that’s not what happened. His actions as well as his inaction had and will have grievous, lasting ramifications. And he knows that.

Favorite moment from their arc:

The moment where he destroys the mercy button. It’s such a phenomenal moment. It’s the moment where you realize that it really is kill or be killed this time. One of us has to die. And he does everything that he can (in his mind) to make sure that Frisk is not the one who dies, starting with showing them that giving him mercy is not an option. It gives me chills every time.

Least favorite moment from their arc:

Well, I already covered the scene where Toriel confronts him in the true pacifist route. I’d feel bad to leave this section basically blank, but the only other scene that I can think of that I could put here is not necessarily bad story-wise, but it is my least favorite because of how upsetting it was for me to witness. I’m still not sure if I’m ready to talk about it directly. If you’ve seen/played a route where neither you nor Flowey kills Asgore, then you already know what I’m talking about.

One relationship they have with another character:

Him and Undyne! I think their sort of father-daughter relationship is criminally underrated! He practically adopted her right after she had just tried to murder him! And then they bonded through combat training and tea making! And the way she looks up to him almost as a father-figure! It just! Ngaaaahhh! It warms my very soul TvT

One relationship I’d like to see explored with this character:

Him and Chara! The two were clearly very close. And then after everything that went down… well. they’re gonna have a lot to unpack. I think it’d be really interesting to see them together post true pacifist, each thinking that the other hates them. should hate them. But in reality, they just hate themselves. And they both blame themselves for everything that happened. I wonder if they’d slowly, tentatively talk it out over time, or if they’d avoid the inevitable and bottle it all up until they can’t anymore and have a very emotionally charged discussion that comes to a mostly healthy conclusion that isn’t perfect, but it’s a start. I dunno. I would also just like to see them gardening together

What I would have liked to see happen with them in the media:

I want to see him recover. I want to see him learning to forgive himself and let go of his self-hatred. I want to see him learning to love life again and I want to see him genuinely happy and content. Mostly I want to see him with an emotional support cat. He will have an emotional support cat.

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the-last-kenobi · 3 years

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I really don’t mean to offend you, but… lambasting someone for speaking the truth and explaining Anakin’s actions with supporting evidence, just because it’s hard to hear is… wrong. It’s hard to disregard your own biases and listen with an open mind, but I’ve done it. The biggest problem is that there aren’t enough people who do that, and I’m not saying you’re one of them. Only you know the answer to that. I hate when people are fighting, especially people I know. Just saying… :)

Hi, fanfictasia! I think we’ve been in one another’s orbits for a long time, following and liking posts and definitely an ask or two! It’s nice to have a conversation.

I don’t have a problem with honest discourse. I like running up against differing opinions - even if in the moment it can be quite annoying! No one particularly loves to have their head canons challenged. And Star Wars is complicated. There’s like ten different layers of canon, not to mention the Disney upheaval that scrambled that even further!

What I do have a problem with is being labeled with such things as “Kenobist” and “ignorant” because I refuse to engage in a drawn-out fight.

Did I have replies for each and every one of englishlady’s points? Yes. Could she have replied to those with more points? Almost definitely. Could I then have countered those? Yup. It would have gone on and on.

And sometimes that can be fun.

But when people refuse to hear about Anakin’s responsibility for his own actions, even under persuasion, and then throw around labels to demean people who do want to discuss those actions, it isn’t fun. When I write a post meant simply to convey the emotional devastation a betrayal like that can cause - we’ve all had friends backstab us, relationships fall apart, bullies prey on us - but having your dearest, closest friend that you trust absolutely not just stop being friends with you but commit genocide and try to kill you on the flimsy reasoning that he’s channeling from a person who manipulated them? — that’s different — when I write that post about emotional impact and get immediate anon hate and one or two comments like “everyone around Anakin deserved to have their souls and lives ruined like that” … that’s not fun.

That’s not fun at all. That’s just bullying.

I’m planning a post that does go back and counter the points englishlady raised, because they’re interesting and I think people in the Star War’s tags should be able to hear both sides.

But I refuse to engage with her like that, in a back-and-forth where I’m being called names and called fake because I opened my phone one morning to a post full of bitterness and one-sided evidence, when I was literally on vacation and not in the mood to go trudging through wookipedia and other sources just to reply.

I refuse to open my inbox, my notifications, my posts, and my multuals to that kind of heat.

I believe all the characters of Star Wars are deeply flawed. They all tick me off, even infuriate me, sometimes. They make bad choices.

Anakin’s character design is literally that he’s the bad history. The amazing potential that chose otherwise, because he had traumas in his past and a selfish inclination towards possessive love. Remember that Luke came first, story-wise, and that Anakin is his backstory, the tragic hero turned villain that needed redemption. His son Luke is the traumatized hero with people emotionally pulling him in different directions, who almost falls into a very similar trap of love and power, but chooses to resist.

I won’t bow to labels and accusations over something as entertaining and individualized as a fandom.

Nor will I stop discussing my own opinions, just as much as others will.

Thanks for the ask :)

#asks #star wars #star wars discourse #obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker

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mahizli · 3 years

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Oh my dear friend, how about Yoda for the character ask???

Thank you so much my dear @sirikenobi12 for asking this and sorry for this late answer. You know, I got help from @sandfordsmostwanted with the “breaking their a** down”, and I want to reassure you that I certainly won’t do that with Yoda :).

How I feel about Yoda :

Well, it is simple, it is a character that is very, very dear to me, and that holds a lot of the Star Wars essence for me. Everybody knows Master Yoda, a lot of people quote him... and to me, there is something reminiscent of this in the Jedi world, because from Youngling to Master, every Jedi is somehow bound to him.

What I love about Yoda is his genuine compassion, and the way one can see he is probably, during ROTS, the Jedi who has travelled furthest in the Force. I see him as a true mystic who has overcome so many trials in his way of travelling the Jedi Way that everything he says, does or feels *seems* simple. But, I think Yoda almost travelled “from Youngling to the Force and back”. I think Yoda grasped, truly, that the most important things are very, very simple, that one can train and gather skills and knowledge and still be nothing, and that this very nothing is still beautiful, and everything...

All the people I ship romantically with this character :

Hahaha, nobody!!

And in this, I’m probably being unfair, because Yoda is an ageing Jedi, and we people tend to forget that there is no age to love romantically. But I truly do not ship Yoda with anyone. I think he probably experienced love - in all its kinds - during his very, very long life. But Yoda has an agespan that is hard to match, and I think that, to him, romantic love no longer is something he wants to experience, because it is “only an aspect” of the Force.

No... wait... I got it. I just ship Yoda with the Force. And I’m not kidding.

I think Yoda loves, unconditionnally, through the Force. And that he bestows love, compassion and care on everyone he sees, like a true mystic.

My non-romantic OTP for this character :

@sirikenobi12 already detailled brilliantly in her post about Mace how Yoda and Mace Windu are strongly linked, and have such a beautiful bond.

And I think they are really wonderful together. But I also think that Yoda has a special bond with Obi-Wan. The episode where Obi-Wan was so worried about Yoda having visions was wonderful to me, and I also think that Yoda loves Obi-Wan’s Force-signature, because it is so calm and peaceful, when Obi-Wan is truly able to be *him*. Yoda trusts Obi-Wan, and they move from their teaching relationship to one of friendship, and I love it so much.

Plus, in my headcanon, Yoda is the one finding Obi-Wan on Stewjon and bringing him to the temple.

My unpopular opinion about this character :

‘Yoda’ and ‘unpopular’ do not compute in my brain :).

So instead of voicing an unpopular opinion, I want to share my headcanon about Yoda’s inner imagery. We all write him using that weird syntax he has, and I really enjoy it. It allows to stress the important information first, and also... to go full circle when Yoda speaks. But I see Yoda very much as a mystic, someone who goes beyond words and signatures and is in fact a true poet through the Force, even though his words do not convey it.

For me, Yoda also sees people as symbols... like verses of a haiku, like a soft ink painting. So, in his mind, Obi-Wan is both a reed and a brooklet, Qui-Gon is an oak, Anakin is a will-o’-wisp when he is little, Quinlan is a lark, and so on... And he calls people like that, and they all somehow accept it.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon :

Honestly? That Yoda would not have been the one feeling all these deaths during Order 66 - for tragic and narrative reasons, Order 66 is a milestone in the saga. But it is so sad, and I think it’s just like being “crucified”, to stay in the biblical/mystic lexical field.

Perhaps, what I would have liked would have seen him be, with Luke, the teacher we see in AOTC : wise, respected, and just so classy... But then, I think that him being so playful and pretending to be some very simple creature is such an act of humilty and so very *Yoda* - and I just adore him even more.

Thanks for those who read this!

For Master Yoda, indeed, in my heart, much love I have <3.

#yoda #Character Study #star wars #star wars fanfiction #tumblr ask #i love yoda #jedi appreciation

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ladyrynofsunnydale · 3 years

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Bo-Katan Week Day 6/ Bo-Katan and Korkie

Title: Mandalorians are Stronger Together

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Major Character Death

Relationships: Bo-Katan Kryze & Korkie Kryze, Bo-Katan Kryze & Satine Kryze, Korkie Kryze & Satine Kryze, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Satine Kryze

Additional Tags: Post-Episode: s05e16 The Lawless, Family, Korkie Kryze is a Kenobi, Korkie Kryze Needs a Hug

Summary: Satine is dead and there was nothing Bo-Katan could do about it, and she needs to tell Korkie. An Aunt and a nephew who haven’t spent more than a day together are now all the immediate family each other has left.

Author’s Note: Happy Day 6 of Bo-Katan Week! Yeah, I just keep putting poor Bo-Katan in these heart wrenching situations. I can’t help it. She needs happiness, but my brain keeps churning out these. I was excited to write this as I love the thought of Korkie and Bo-Katan getting to know each other and developing a relationship, though unfortunately that all occurs after Satine, their connecting factor, is dead. Tragic from the beginning.

Warnings for loss and hurt

Tagging: @bokatanweek

Click on the link above to read or read down below

Bo-Katan watched the boy out of the corner of her eye. Korkie. Her nephew. Officially on his paperwork he was the son of one of her and Satine’s closest cousins and his wife. Unofficially, however, there was no way he was not Satine and Obi-Wan’s son.

Recognizing that Mandalore was a lost cause with the commandos she had, Bo had fled Sundari, leaving a few of her most trusted commandos to keep watch on Almec and Maul, though Maul had mysteriously disappeared. She’d left Korkie with some of her commandos on Kalevala when she’d gone back to Sundari to try to free Satine once again. She’d had high hopes for the Jedi when he’d shown up, but…it was not to be. Returning to Kalevala, Korkie was the first to greet her when she’d descended from her starfighter, his eyes filled with hope. She’d met them and shook her head and had tried to walk away, but Korkie jogged to keep up with her and grabbed her arm. Bo had almost growled and pulled her arm away.

“What happened? Auntie? Is she…?”

“She’s dead, Korkie.” Her words had been clipped and short, masking any emotion, and Korkie had stopped dead in his tracks.

“Dead?” she’d heard him say, and she had finally stopped and turned. “What…what happened?” Tears were filling his eyes, and Bo had clenched her jaw to keep any tears from forming in her own.

“Maul. He used her to bait Kenobi, then he killed her.”

“And you didn’t do anything?!” Korkie shouted, rage filling his eyes.

“There was nothing I could do Korkie! The throne room is designed to be impregnable.”

“You didn’t care about her at all! You just wanted to use her!”

“Don’t you dare tell me what I feel!” Bo had snapped back, striding back to Korkie and poking him in the chest with her finger. “You have no idea! No idea!”

Korkie had glared at her then turn and stormed off. Bo was shaking and to her shame she found she was way too close to crying. She’d stormed her way to Axe Woves, who’d she’d left in charge of the commandos she’d left behind, and demanded a report.

But now here she was, silently eating dinner, and she couldn’t help but stare at her nephew. His words had stung. When she was younger, Satine had been her world. She’d idolized her. After their parents had been murdered she and Satine had been separated, and she’d been scooped up by Death Watch. Her world had never been the same again. But in all that time, despite telling herself over and over that she hated Satine and her regime, she’d still loved her. Pre callously talking about killing her had cut her to the bone, but she’d gone along with it. She had hoped that maybe she could figure out a way to spare her sister. But in the end, Satine’s fate hadn’t even been in Pre’s hands.

She could see the tear tracks on Korkie’s face. He was off to the side, away from her other commandos, and his shoulders were hunched like he was trying to ward off a blow. Bo sighed and stood, walking over to him and sitting down on the log next to him.

“I’m sorry, Korkie.”

Korkie looked up and she could see more unshed tears in his eyes.

“No, I’m sorry Bo-Katan. I shouldn’t have lashed out at you.”

Bo bumped his shoulder with hers.

“We’re Kryzes. Lashing out is what we do best.”

That earned her at least a little smile.

“I can’t believe she’s gone,” Korkie said, his voice sounding so lost. “She’s been there for me for as long as I can remember.” He turned to Bo. “Were you two close?”

“When I was younger? Extremely. She was my big sister. She hung the moons and stars in the sky and I would have followed her anywhere.” Korkie smiled sadly at that.

“What happened?”

“The Civil War. And Death Watch.”

“Auntie,” Korkie began, his voice shaking, “Auntie wasn’t trying to destroy Mandalore. She was trying to make it better, safer.”

“And look where that got her,” Bo snapped and Korkie recoiled, though he gazed at her steadily. There was no way that Korkie was not Kenobi’s son.

“She wasn’t the one who attacked Mandalore with crime syndicates.”

Bo wanted to snap back at him, and she felt the heat of anger rising in her chest. What did he know? What did he know of what Death Watch was trying to do? They were protecting Mandalorian culture that had survived thousands of years. But she paused and glanced around at her commandos. Very few of them who were loyal to Mandalore and not Maul remained. Maul’s plans would strip Mandalore and destroy the planet better than Satine ever could have. Is this what Death Watch had led to? In her mind’s eye she saw the wasteland that was Mandalore’s landscape. Was warfare any better?

She glanced at him and noticed he didn’t have any food.

“Did you eat?”

“I’m not hungry,” he stated.

“You need to eat Korkie.”

“You’re not in charge of me, Bo-Katan.”

Bo opened her mouth to retort, her anger rising again, and bit back her reply. Standing she headed to where the food was being handed out and collected a ration and headed back to Korkie.

“Here. Eat.”

“I told you I’m not hungry.”

“Well, Satine would want you to eat. So eat.”

Korkie hesitantly took the ration and stared at it. With a sigh he slowly began eating, chewing for much longer than he needed.

“You need to swallow too.”

He glared at her, but swallowed. They sat in silence, Korkie slowly finishing his ration, both staring out into the gloomy darkness that was Kalevala in winter.

“This is the first time I’ve been off Mandalore since I was born,” Korkie said, and Bo looked at him. “Not quite what I was hoping for.”

“Kalevala isn’t exactly the prettiest planet.”

“That’s not what I meant.” They sat in silence again before Korkie once again broke it. “Did you know my parents?” he asked and Bo bit her inner lip. Every good lie had a grain of truth in it. Did she know the people who on his records were said to be his parents? Vaguely. She thinks she met them once when she was 6 when she had to go to their wedding. It was a very boring wedding. They seemed nice enough? Their deaths were one of the first of the Great Clan Wars. She remembered that. But Satine and Obi-Wan? Yes she knew them. Admittedly not very well, but she knew them.

“Yes,” she answered simply. “You remind me a lot of them,” she answered truthfully. He met her eyes and she saw the longing in his eyes. “You have your mother’s kindness and fire. And your father’s patience.”

“I wish I could have known them,” he said sadly and Bo’s heart softened for him. “Auntie Satine was the only family I had. The only family I really needed to be honest.”

“She was a good person,” Bo said, nodding. She glanced around and back to him. “You’re welcome to stay with us for as long as you like.” Korkie looked up at her.

“And if I don’t want to stay?”

“Then you don’t have to. But Korkie, those of us loyal to Mandalore, we’re a small lot.” A realization came to her like a knife to her gut. “We should stay together. Mandalorians are stronger together.”

“I’ll think about it,” Korkie said, and Bo nodded and stood, placing her hand on his shoulder. She opened her mouth to say something, anything, but closed it. Instead she squeezed his shoulder and nodded at him, and he nodded back.

Walking away she had one thought. She’d failed Satine, but she wouldn’t fail Mandalore. Or Satine’s son.

#bo katan week #bo katan kryze #bo-katan kryze #korkie kryze #korkie kenobi #korkie is a kenobi #satine kryze #post lawless #fanfiction

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geshertzarmeod · 3 years

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Favorite Books of 2020

I wanted to put together a list! I read 74 new books this year, and I keep track of that on Goodreads - feel free to add or follow me if you want to see everything! I’m going to focus on the highlights, and the books that stuck with me personally in one way or another, in approximate order. Also, all but two of them (#5 and #7 on the honorable mention list) are queer/trans in some way. Links are to Goodreads, but if you’re looking to get the books, I suggest your library, the Libby app using your library, your local bookstore, or Bookshop.

The Faggots & Their Friends Between Revolutions by Larry Mitchell, illus. by Ned Asta (originally published 1977). I had a hard beginning of the year and was in a work environment where my queerness was just not welcomed or wanted. I read this in the middle of all of that, and it helped me so much. I took this book with me everywhere. I read it on planes. I read it on the bus, and on trains, and at shul. I showed it to friends... sometimes at shul, or professional development conferences. It healed my soul. Now I can’t find it and might get a new copy. When I reviewed it, in February, I wrote: “I think we all need this book right now, but I really needed this book right now. Wow. This book is magic, and brings back a sense of magic and beauty to my relationship with the world.” Also I bought my copy last July, in a gay bookstore on Castro St. in SF, and that in itself is just beautiful to me. (Here’s a post I made with some excerpts)

Once & Future duology, especially the sequel, Sword in the Stars, by A.R. Capetta and Cory McCarthy. Cis pansexual female King Arthur Ari Helix (she's the 42nd reincarnation and the first female one) in futuristic space with Arab ancestry (but like, from a planet where people from that area of earth migrated to because, futuristic space) works to end Future Evil Amazon.com Space Empire with her found family with a token straight cis man and token white person. Merlin is backwards-aging so he's a gay teenager with a crush and thousands of years of baggage. The book’s entire basis is found family, and it's got King Arthur in space. And the sequel hijacks the original myth and says “fuck you pop culture, it was whitewashed and straightwashed, there were queer and trans people of color and strong women there the whole time.” Which is like, my favorite thing to find in media, and a big part of why I love Xena so much. It’s like revisionist history to make it better except it’s actually probably true in ways. Anyway please read these books but also be prepared for an absolutely absurd and wild ride. Full disclosure though, I didn’t love the first book so much, it’s worth it for the sequel!

The Wicker King by K. Ancrum. This book hurt. It still hurts. But it was so good. It took me on a whole journey, and brought me to my destination just like it intended the whole time. The author’s note at the end made me cry! The sheer NEED from this book, the way the main relationship develops and shifts, and how you PERCEIVE the main relationship develops and shifts. I’m in awe of Ancrum’s writing. If you like your ships feral and needy and desperate and wanting and D/S vibes and lowkey super unhealthy but with the potential, with work, to become healthy and beautiful and right, read this book. This might be another one to check trigger warnings for though.

The Entirety of The Daevabad Trilogy by S.A. Chakraborty. I hadn’t heard of this series until this year, when a good friend recommended it to me. It filled the black hole in me left by Harry Potter. The political and mystical/fantasy world building is just *chef’s kiss* - the complexity! The morally grey, everyone’s-done-awful-things-but-some-people-are-still-trying-to-do-good tapestry! The ROMANCE oh my GOD the romance. If I’m absolutely fully invested in a heterosexual romance you know a book is good, but also this book had background (and then later less background) queer characters! And the DRAMA!!! The third book went in a direction that felt a little out of nowhere but honestly I loved the ride. I stayed up until 6am multiple times reading this series and I’d do it again.

An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon. I loved this book so much that it’s the only book I reviewed on my basically abandoned attempt at a book blog. This book is haunting, horrifying, disturbing, dark, but so, so good. The character's voices were so specific and clear, the relationships so clearly affected by circumstance and yet loving in the ways they could be. This is my favorite portrayal of gender maybe ever, it’s just... I don’t even have the words but I saw a post @audible-smiles made about it that’s been rattling in my head since. And, “you gender-malcontent. You otherling,” as tender pillow talk??? Be still my heart. Be ready, though, this book has all the triggers.. it’s a .

Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender. This book called me out on my perspective on love. Also, it made me cry a lot. And it has two different interesting well-written romance storylines. And a realistic coming-into-identity narrative about a Black trans demiboy. And a nuanced discussion of college plans and what one might do after college. And some big beautiful romcom moments. I wish I had it in high school. I’m so glad I have it now! (trigger warning for transphobia & outing, but the people responsible are held accountable by the end, always treated as not okay by the narrative, and the MC’s friends, and like... this is ownvoices and it’s GOOD.)

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern. My Goodreads review says, “I have no idea what happened, and I loved it.” That’s not wrong, but to delve deeper, this book has an ethereal feeling that you get wrapped up in while reading. Nothing makes sense but that’s just as it should be. You’re hooked. It is so atmospheric, so meta, so fascinating. I’ve seen so many people say they interpreted this character or that part or the ending in all different ways and it all makes sense. And it’s all of this with a gay main character and romance and the central theme, the central pillar being a love of and devotion to stories. Of course I was going to love it.

Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl’s Confabulous Memoir by Kai Cheng Thom. “Because maybe what really matters isn’t whether something is true, or false. Maybe what matters is the story itself; what kinds of doors it opens, what kinds of dreams it brings.” This book was so good and paradigm shifting. It reminded me of #1 on this list in the way it turns real life experience and hard, tragic ones at that (in this case, of being a trans girl of color who leaves home and tries to make a life for herself in the city, with its violence), into a beautiful, haunting fable. Once upon a time.

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver. I need to reread this book, as I read it during my most tranceful time of 2020 and didn’t write a review, so I forgot a lot. What I do remember is beautiful and important nonbinary representation, a really cute romance, an interesting parental and familial/sibling dynamic that was both heartbreaking and hopeful, and an on-page therapy storyline. Also Mason Deaver just left twitter but was an absolutely hilarious troll on it before leaving and I appreciate that (and they just published a Christmas novella that I have but haven’t read yet!)

The Truth Is by NoNieqa Ramos. It took a long time to trust this book but I’m so glad I did. It’s raw and real and full of grief and trauma (trigger warnings, that I remember, for grief, death (before beginning of book), and gun violence). The protagonist is flawed and gets to grow over the course of the book, and find her own place, and learn from the people around her, while they also learn to understand her and where she’s coming from. It’s got a gritty, harsh, and important portrayal of found family, messy queerness, and some breathtaking quotes. When I was 82% through this book I posted this update: “This book has addressed almost all of my initial hesitations, and managed to complicate itself beautifully.”

Anger is a Gift by Mark Oshiro. I wasn’t actually in the best mental health place to read this book when I did (didn’t quite understand what it was) but it definitely reminded me of what there is to fight against and to fight for, and broke my heart, and nudged me a bit closer to hope. The naturally diverse cast of characters was one of the best parts of this book. The romance is so sweet and tender and then so painful. This book is important and well-written but read it with caution and trigger warnings - it’s about grief and trauma and racism and police brutality, but also about love and community.

The Prey of Gods by Nicky Drayden. This is a sci-fi/fantasy/specfic mashup that takes place in near-future South Africa and has world-building myths with gods and demigoddesses and a trip to the world of the dead but also a genetically altered hallucinogenic drug that turns people into giant animals and a robot uprising and a political campaign and a transgender pop star and a m/m couple and all of them are connected. It’s bonkers. Like, so, so absolutely mind-breaking weird. And I loved it.

Crier’s War and Iron Heart by Nina Varela. I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVED the amount of folktales they told each other with queer romances as integral to those stories, especially in Iron Heart. A conversation between the two leads where Crier says she wants to read Ayla like a book, and Ayla says she’s not a book, and Crier explains all the different ways she wants to know Ayla, like a person, and wants to deserve to know her like a person, made me weak. It lives in my head rent-free.

Queen’s Shadow by E.K. Johnston @ekjohnston . I listened to this book on Libby and then immediately listened to it at least one more time, maybe twice, before my borrow time ran out. I love Padmé, and just always wish that female Star Wars characters got more focus and attention and this book gave me that!! And queer handmaidens! And the implication that Sabé is in love with Padmé and that’s just something that will always be true and she will always be devoted and also will make her own life anyway. And the Star Wars audiobooks being recorded the way they are with background sounds and music means it feels like watching a really long detailed beautiful Star Wars movie just about Padmé and her handmaidens.

Sissy: A Coming of Gender Story by Jacob Tobia. I needed to read this. The way Tobia talks about their experience of gender within the contexts of college, college leadership, and career, hit home. I kept trying to highlight several pages in a row on my kindle so I could go back and read them after it got returned to the library (sadly it didn’t work - it cuts off highlights after a certain number of characters). The way they talk about TOKENISM they way they talk about the responsibilities of the interviewer when an interviewee holds marginalized identities especially when no one else in the room does!!! Ahhhh!!!

Bonds of Brass by Emily Skrutskie. Disclaimer for this one that the author was rightfully criticized for writing a Black main character as a white author (and how the story ended up playing into some fucked up stuff that I can’t really unpack without spoiling). But also, the author has been working to move forward knowing she can’t change the past, has donated her proceeds, and this book is really good? It has all the fanfic tropes, so much delicious tension, a totally unexpected plot twist that had me immediately rereading the book. This book was super fun and also kind of just really really good Star Wars fanfiction.

How To Be a Normal Person by T.J. Klune. This book was so sweet, and cute, and hopeful, and both ridiculous and so real. I had some trouble getting used to Gus’ voice and internal monologue, but I got into it and then loved every bit after. The ace rep is something I’ve never seen like this before (and have barely read any ace books but still this was so fleshed out and well rounded and not just like, ‘they’re obsessed with swords not sex’ - looking at you, Once & Future - and leaving it there.) This all felt like a slice of life and I feel like I learned about people while reading it. Some of the moments are so, so funny, some are vaguely devastating. I have been personally victimized by TJ Klune for how he ends this book (a joke, you will know once you read it) but it also reminds me of the end of the “You Are There” episode of Xena and we all know what the answer to that question was.... and I choose to believe the answer here was similar.

You Should See Me in a Crown by Leah Johnson. I wish I had this book when I was in high school. I honestly have complicated feelings about prom and haven’t really been seeking out contemporary YA so I was hesitant to read this but it was so good and so well-written, and had a lot of depth to it. The movie (and Broadway show) “The Prom” wants what this book has.

Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M. Danforth. I never read horror books, so this was a new thing for me. I loved the feeling of this book, the way I felt fully immersed. I loved how entirely queer it was. I was interested in the characters and the relationships, even though we didn’t have a full chance to go super deep into any one person but rather saw the connections between everyone and the way the stories matched up with each other. I just wanted a bit of a more satisfying ending.

Honorable Mention: reread in 2020 but read for the first time pre-2020

Red White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston. I couldn’t make this post without mentioning this book. It got me through this year. I love this book so much; I think of this book all the time. This book made me want to find love for myself. You’ve all heard about it enough but if you haven’t read this book what are you DOING.

In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan @sarahreesbrennan . I reread this one over and over too, both as text and as an audiobook. I went for walks when I had lost my earbuds and had Elliott screaming about an elf brothel loudly playing and got weird looks from someone walking their dog. I love this book so much. It’s just so fun, and so healing to read a book reminiscent of all the fantasies I read as a kid, but with a bi main character and a deconstruction of patriarchy and making fun of the genre a bit. Also, idiots to lovers is a great trope and it’s definitely in this book.

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz. This book is forever so important to me. I am always drawn in by how tenderly Sáenz portrays his characters. These boys. These boys and their parents. I love them. I love them so much. This is another one where I don’t even know what to say. I have more than 30 pages in my tag for this book. I have “arda” set as a keyboard shortcut on my phone and laptop to turn into the full title. This book saved my life.

Last Night I Sang to the Monster by Benjamin Alire Sáenz. This book hurts to read - it’s a story about trauma, about working through that trauma, healing enough to be ready to hold the worst memories, healing enough to move through the pain and start to make a life. It’s about found family and love and pain and I love it. It’s cathartic. And it’s a little bit quietly queer in a beautiful way, but that’s not the focus. Look up trigger warnings (they kind of are spoilery so I won’t say them here but if you have the potential to be triggered please look them up or ask me before reading)

Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine. When asked what my all time favorite book is, it’s usually this one. Gail Carson Levine has been doing live readings at 11am since the beginning of the pandemic shut down in the US, and the first book she read was Ella Enchanted. I’ve been slowly reading it to @mssarahpearl and am just so glad still that it has the ability to draw me in and calm me down and feels like home after all this time. This book is about agency. I love it.

Radio Silence by Alice Oseman @chronicintrovert . I’ve had this on my all-time-faves list since I read it a few years ago and ended up rereading it this year before sending a gift copy to a friend, so I could write little notes in it. It felt a little different reading it this time - as I get further away from being a teenager myself, the character voice this book is written in takes a little longer to get used to, but it’s so authentic and earnest and I love it. I absolutely adore this book about platonic love and found family and fandom and mental illness and abuse and ace identity and queerness and self-determination, especially around college and career choices. Ahhh. Thank you Alice Oseman!!!

Leia: Princess of Alderaan by Claudia Gray @claudiagray . I have this one on audible and reread it several times this year. I love the fleshing out of Leia’s story before the original trilogy, I love her having had a relationship before Han, and the way it would have affected her perspective. I also am intrigued by the way it analyses the choices the early rebellion had to make... I just, I love all the female focused new Star Wars content and the complexity being brought to the rebellion.

#red white and royal blue #aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe #osemanverse #star wars #queer books #lgbtq books #books #alice oseman #miri personal #wow this took so long but was so worth it!#long post #book recs #PS: if you've read any of these or have questions about any of these books #this is your formal invitation to talk to me about them!!!! even if i don't know you at all!#even if i don't follow you and even if you don't follow me!#my ask box is open anon is on!#original content

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crispyjenkins · 4 years

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Convince me, CJ! Make me an Obi Wan stan!

AIGHT NEVER DONE ONE OF THESE BUT HERE WE GO

dunno if you were wanting headcanons or facts, so have some of both

1. tragedy

these posts which are too long to screenshot but say things better than my dumb ass:

duel of the fates analysis by @panharmonium

obi’s sticking to the code even through tragedy by @tarantula-hawk-wasp and @jedi-order-apologist

comparing duel of the fates with the maul duel in rebels by @princeobiwan and @padawanakin

( @panharmonium ) with a wonderful comic here

“Contemplation of death brought only one slight sting of regret, and more than a bit of puzzlement. Until this very moment, he had never realized he’d always expected, for no discernible reason, that when he died, Anakin would be with him.” ― from the Revenge of the Sith novel by Matthew Stover

and his entire story from the jedi apprentice books by Jude Watson (and Dave Wolverton) it makes me weep.

2. worth

this boi just?? doesn’t believe himself? (thanks qui-gon but that’s another post)

from the Revenge of the Sith novel by Matthew Stover

(side note, he’s one of the youngest council members ever?)

and another quote

“He is respected throughout the Jedi Order for his insight as well as his warrior skills. He has become the hero of the next generation of Padawans; he is the Jedi their Masters hold up as a model. He is the being that the Council assigns to their most important missions. He is modest, centered and always kind. He is the ultimate Jedi. It is characteristic of Obi-Wan that he is entirely unaware of this.” — Matthew Stover

didn’t mean for all of those to be stover quotes but here we are

(somewhat related is this excellent post by @gffa discussing obi-wan being a terrifyingly competent fighter)

3. shippable

( @yeahyeahyeaaah )

( @padawansuggest ) and this ship needs more fanart *cries*

( @amiro-art )

this comic for obirex by @jaegervega (cries in rarepairs)

and more that i don’t ship for squick reasons (QuiObi, ObiMaul, MaceObi, ObiTine, etc.)

4. he’s. so. feckin. light?

( @phsmas )

this post from @panharmonium talking about the quote:

“And you, Master. What does your heart tell you you’re meant for?” “Infinite sadness,” Obi-Wan said, even while smiling.”

5. him cute??

(can’t find the original source 😭)

( @lightasthesun i think??)

( @saeseetiin ) like?????? thumb loops?????

and many more instances that i seem to have lost because i fecked up and tagged obi stuff with a hyphen and url coding doesn’t like that

6. him flirt. him never stop flirt.

i’m also having trouble finding pics/gifs of this and i’m sort of too hungry to keep trying, but he flirts while fighting pretty much everybody, which i find very brave and endearing, and love when he doesn’t even realise he’s doing it. i just. he’s so willing to sass.

9. ewan mcgreggor put SO MUCH WORK INTO OBI-WAN, he put so much of himself into that role and those movies that i really don’t think you can seperate love for them.

this gif set about him picking his ‘saber in phantom menace ( @kenobi-wxn )

this one where he’s just!! so excited!! to be doing star wars!! ( @manny-jacinto )

him talking about the cultural impact of duel of the fates ( @princeobiwan )

some bloopers from revenge of the sith ( @greenarrow )

him doing george lucas’ job helping daniel logan (boba) in attack of the clones ( @glittergreedo )

( @clubjade ) with an emphasis on

“Now, many years later, the prequels meant a lot to the generation that were kids then. So from smirking, cynical opinions, now I’m getting feedback from the kids they were made for. I’m really happy about that.”

10. some misc. stuff i collected that i didn’t know where else to put

( @theravenjedi )

( @animymind )

and my favourite fucking obi thing of all time:

( @luvvewan ) i just. i have no words for this post. i love him so much.

stuff i can’t find pic/quote evidence for ‘cause i’m too hungry:

he loves the clones. so much. would literally rather die than lose men needlessly

is padmé’s most trusted jedi (even over anakin) and their friendship drives me to tears

had to be told to stop promoting cody

is super strong in the unifying force and has/had lots of visions which i think is underutilised in canon and fanon (so i end up putting it in almost all my writing whoops i love him being an anxious boy so much)

got yelled at by owen lars for trying to help luke from afar and i will FIGHT—

him baby blues

how fecking confused he is when he first lands on kamino

whatever the fuck is happening in this post

came so. fecking. far. from how he was as a padawan, mastered his emotions and found his spot in the universe, no matter how tragic it was

blames himself for both anakin’s fall and the clone chips (even if he never learned about them, which i don’t know what’s canon anymore whether he did or not)

he just?? has so much love in his big ol’ heart? and forgives and grieves and sighs and lives and trusts and dies. and then helps anakin become a force ghost because he can’t imagine death without him.

and now for some headcanons

he likes really realllly bitter tea, partly because qui-gon liked lighter teas so when he starts picking his own after being knighted, he goes with more flavourful ones

his immune system is shot after the clone wars ‘cause he uses so many stims/adrenaline shots/whatever they call them in the gffa because he’s in charge of a third of the GAR and he already worked himself too hard before the wars and boy howdy do those fuck up your immune system

cut his own padawan braid after qui-gon’s death

even though he almost left he order for Satine, he WOULD have if Anakin asked

was lowkey devastated that anakin did not give him his padawan braid after his knighting during the clone wars (no clue what’s canon anymore? but i grew up on the 2003 clone wars, and anakin gives it to padmé and i’m still having feelings about it)

is the council’s baby, in that everyone on the council either saw/helped him grow up, or grew up with him.

while canon says he could never kill anakin, he would have killed vader to protect luke

so in conclusion:

( @left-leggus )

#long post #cj answers #anon #obi wan kenobi #analysis #prequel trilogy #original trilogy #clone wars #i'm so sorry to everybody i ended up tagging in this #i didn't want your work to go uncredited #the obi stan saga

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warrioreowynofrohan · 4 years

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Vice and Virtue in Tolkien’s Works

I’ve been rereading Dante’s Purgatorio (easily my favourite of the three sections, both for having a very satisfying structure and for its themes of repentance and reform), and the structure inspired this post. Each level of purgatory has images, words, or both, associated with the vice being reformed and its corresponding virtue (the examples being drawn both from the Bible and Greco-Roman history and mythology) and it gave me ideas for a discussion of similar themes in Tolkien’s works.

The structure is: 1) Pride/Humility; 2) Envy/Generosity of Spirit; 3) Wrath/Charity; 4) Sloth/Zeal); 5) Avarice/Simplicity; 6) Gluttony/Abstinence; 7) Lust/Romantic Love.

1) Pride/Humility

Saruman: Our time is at hand: the world of Men, which we must rule. But we must have power, power to order all things as we will, for that good which only the Wise can see.

Frodo: I will take the Ring, though I do not know the way.

This is easily the primary emphasis in Tolkien’s works. The fall of all his main villains (Morgoth, Sauron, Fëanor, the Númenoreans, Saruman) and as well as other non-villainous tragic characters (Túrin, Thingol, Turgon, Thorin, Denethor) is characterized by pride - the desire to be the one calling the shots, the desire for greatness and others’ recognition of that greatness, the refusal to listen to the advice or views of others.

It’s there in Melkor’s desire for his theme to be the only one heard in the Music; in Sauron’s desire to rule the world and arrange everything as he thinks best; in Fëanor’s determination to take any advice, correction, or disagreement as a personal attack, his desire for rulership in Middle-earth, and his attitude that the Silmarils are more important than anything anyone else has done or created; the late-stage Númenoreans’ campaign of imperialist conquest. It’s there in Túrin’s, Thingol’s, and Turgon’s rejection of good advice; in Thingol’s attitude towards other peoples, whether it’s Beren or the dwarves; in Denethor’s conviction that Gondor is the only place and people of any account in the war against Sauron.

Humility, in contrast, is mainly seen in the form of hobbits. None of them have any idea what they’re doing when they leave Rivendell (Sam and Pippin don’t even know where Mordor is), and they know they’ve got no idea. They’re not going because they see themselves as specially skilled or qualified, but because it needs to be done. And that’s the very reason Frodo can resist the Ring so long, and Sam can resist it, because they don’t have any grand ideas of themselves.

The ability to say I don’t know what I’m doing, but I’ll try to do what’s right is pretty crucial to humility; even members of the Fellowship who are far more experienced, skilled and knowledgeable than the hobbits show it. Aragorn says it, in the search for Merry and Pippin when they’re captured by orcs. Pride could easily say I need to go with the Ring-bearer, that’s the most important task or I need to go to Gondor and lead the war against Sauron as their King. But Aragorn lets himself trust in other people doing their parts, and focuses on rescuing his companions - the thing that no one else is a available to do - even as the chase seems increasingly hopeless. It’s also seen in Gandalf, who openly admitted he was scared to go when the Valar first sent him, and wandered around as an old man in a battered cloak and hat, talking with everyone, rather than setting himself up as a Respectable Dignified Authority Figure the way Saruman did.

The Silmarillion has fewer examples of humility than LOTR (perhaps why things turn out so much worse there) but there are a few in the Leithian. Lúthien is another case of saying I don’t know what I’m doing, but I’ll do it because no one else will when she sets off to rescue Beren. Finrod walks away from his crown and realm to help a friend.

2) Envy/Generosity of Spirit

Denethor: I will not step down to be the dotatd chamberlain of an upstart.

Faramir: My lord, you called me. I come. What does the king command?

Envy is akin to pride, but I’m characterizing it as being specifically the resentment of being surpassed (or even equalled) by another.

Fëanor is again a major example of this, specifically in his resentment of Fingolfin and of the descendents of Indis more generally. Peoples of Middle-earth notes that he resented the name Nolofinwë (Fingolfin’s Quenya name, roughly means ‘wise-Finwë or ‘learned-Finwë’) due to regarding himself as not only the most skilled of the Noldor at craftwork (which he was), but also the most skilled at lore/scholarship (which he wasn’t), and likewise resented the name Arafinwë (Finarfin’s Quenya name). He’s in a mental place of resenting anything positive that can be said about his brothers as if it inherently detracts from him. And he takes the same attitude towards Men (‘No other race shall oust us!’), treating their very existence as a threat to the Eldar. Losgar is the peak of this: he’s willing to sabotage his own war effort to prevent Fingolfin from participating. This is contasted with Maedhros’ attitude after being rescued by Fingon, when he willingly gives up the crown and, later, moves across Beleriand to the most exposed section of the northern border to avoid conflict. His own status isn’t his priority; peace with his family and the best interests of the war against Morgoth are his priorities.

Denethor is another major example, seeing both Aragorn’s return and Faramir’s respect for Gandalf as personal affronts to himself. (Gandalf points out that the literal job description of a steward is to be in charge until the king returns. When the king comes back, that means you’ve done your job, not that you’re being demoted. Denethor is not interested in hearing this.) He’s also mentioned in the Appendices to have resented the respect and admiration recieved by Thorongil [i.e. Aragorn in disguise] during the days of their youth. In very similar ways, Saruman resented the high regard that some (like Galadriel) had for Gandalf, and saw Gandalf as a rival. Thorongil and Gandalf were not interested in rivalry; they were more interested in what was achieved than in who was achieving it. Faramir is the contrast here - he is interested in the good of Gondor, not his own status, and has no jealousy of Aragorn.

3. Wrath/Charity

Fëanor: See, half-brother! This is sharper than thy tongue. Try but once more to usurp my place and the love of my father, and maybe it will rid the Noldor of one who seeks to be the master of thralls.

Gandalf: It was Pity that stayed Bilbo’s hand; Pity, and Mercy, not to strike without need.

I would say that this is the third-most-emphasized of the vices in Tolkien’s works, after pride and avarice. And, of course, another Fëanor example: both his threat on Fingolfin’s life and his actions during the Return of the Noldor, the latter being driven by wrath primarily against Morgoth and secondarily against everyone else in his vicinity (Valar! Teleri! Fingolfin and anyone who supports him!). It’s the spillover that’s the problem, and the self-centredness; hating Morgoth isn’t a problem in and of itself, but Fëanor’s taking the fight against evil and turning it into a personal vendetta, with disastrous consequences.

Túrin is another example, most particularly in three events: causing the death of Saeros, burning the hall of Brodda in Dor-lómin, and killing Brandir. The former two are provoked, the latter isn’t, but all of them are sudden deeds of anger that only serve to make matters worse.

The contrasting virtue is charity, mercy shown to people that you have good reason to be hostile towards. Fingon’s rescue of Maedhros. Lúthien’s sparing of Curufin when he and Celegorm attacked her and Beren. Frodo sparing Gollum and treating him with kindness and compassion.

4. Sloth/Zeal

Guard Hobbit: It won’t do no good talking that way. He’ll get to hear of it. And if you make so much noise, you’ll wake the Chief’s Big Man.

Merry: Shire-folk have been so comfortable so long they don’t know what to do. They just want a match, though, and they’ll go up in fire.

This is comparatively less of an emphasis in Tolkien’s works than some of the other pairings, but I can think of some examples. The best one is Saruman’s takeover of the Shire and the subsequent liberation. Sloth is the characteristic hobbit vice (not gluttony; I’ll get to that); they tend towards being comfortable and complacent and don’t like being bestirred. Even Frodo dawdled around for half a year after learning about the Ring, mostly because he was reluctant to go. And under first Lotho and then Saruman, everyone (except Tooks) more or less puts up with an abuses because they don’t want the trouble or danger of standing up against them. It’s the return of Merry, Pippin, Sam, and Frodo, who have experience fighting evil on a much larger scale (and who can organize things) that spurs them to stand up for themselves and their home.

5. Avarice/Simplicity

Celegorm: For the Silmarils we alone claim, until the world ends.

Gandalf: I wonder what has become of [the mithril-shirt]? Gathering dust still in Michel Delving Mathom-house, I suppose.

Avarice is, I would say, the second-most-emphasized vice in Tolkien’s works, after pride. The central conflicts in both The Silmarillion and The Lord of the Rings are objects (they’re in the titles!): the Silmarils and the Ring. The Oath is almost the strongest possible expression of avarice, the most extreme statement of this is mine that a person can make; The Ring is an even more extreme expression, as Sauron makes an object that is literally part of himself. And both conflicts are resolved through the renunciation of claim on these objects, in Eärendil’s journey to Valinor (and the Silmaril becoming a star that is seen by everyone and owned by no one) and Frodo and Sam’s mission to destroy the Ring.

The Silmarils themselves are not evil; they are good and hallowed objects, and fights between elves, dwarves, and men are the result of the Oath (the kinslayings) and the connection with the dragon-contaminated and Mîm-cursed treasure of Nargothrond (Thingol and the dwarves of Nogrod). The Ring is evil, and inducing avarice is its most basic power, even among people like Sméagol and Déagol who could never actually wield it; letting it go is incredibly difficult, and Bilbo and Sam are the only people in the history of the Ring ever to do it.

Avarice is also a central theme in The Hobbit, and dragon-treasure is specifically noted as provoking avarice in people who are in any way inclined towards that vice. Smaug is practically a physical manifestation of avarice in his rage over losing one small cup that he has no use for from an immense hoard, and both Thorin and the master of Lake-town fall prey to the dragon-sickness.

I’ve given ‘simplicity’ as the antonym, and I thought of ‘generosity’ as well, but neither of those is quite right. The opposite of avarice is holding lightly to things, and it’s a particular virtue of hobbits. This is seen both in their birthday parties (the tradition of giving away possessions) and the Michel Delving Mathom-house, a museum for old heirlooms that people feel they don’t need to have around. The most beautiful example is Bilbo’s mithril-shirt (worth more than the entire Shire!) spending some time sitting around there.

It’s worth nothing that the vice of avarice in Tolkien’s works isn’t associated with having stuff, just with holding to stuff. Bag End being comfortable isn’t a problem. The Noldor having piles of jewels isn’t a problem provided that they’re sharing them and letting them go, as in the Noontide of Valinor (gemstones scattered on the seashore!) or Finrod giving them away in Middle-earth. The issue comes when the owning becomes what a person values; the signal that Fëanor is becoming too tied to the Silmarils is when he prefers to lock them away so no one else can see them.

6. Gluttony/Abstinence

Gollum: He’ll eat us all, if he gets it, eat all the world!

The lembas had a virtue without which they would long ago have laid down to die. It did not satisfy desire...and yet this waybread of the Elves had a potency that increased as travellers relied on it alone and did not mingle it with other foods. It fed the will, and gave strength to endure...

Gluttony is distinguished from avarice as the desire to consume things, not merely accumulate them. This is an interesting one, because Tolkien has no issue with the consuption of large amounts of food for enjoyment (which hobbits do frequently and enthusiastically!). As with possessions, enjoyment of physical things isn’t seen as problematic. The enjoyment of everyday pleasures is specifically discussed as morally desirable in a way that contrasts with avaricious accumulation (“If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.”)

However, there is one large (very, very large) example of the concept of gluttony as unlimited consumption and appetite: Ungoliant. Ungoliant represents not the hoarding of things, but their destruction, and is continually described with very physical terms of appetite and devouring. Shelob and the spiders of Mirkwood are lesser versions of the same concept. There are other mosters in the same vein: Sauron’s werewolves and Carcharoth. On of the names for Carcharoth is Anfauglir, the Jaws of Thirst, specifically invoking the idea of insatiable consumption.

And gluttony can be described more broadly as an form of overconsumption which uses up or destroys things; pollution could be a modern-day example. Looked at in that way, gluttony can be considered the end-stage of all evil in Tolkien, in the same way that pride is its beginning-stage. The ruin of the Anfauglith, the Desolation of the Morannon, the trees of Fangorn used to feed the fires of Isengard or hacked down for no purpose (and even Losgar, if you like) are all its work. Gollum (heavily driven by mundane hunger) grasps this when he fears Sauron regaining the Ring: “He’ll eat us all, if he gets it, eat all the world!” Ungoliant is the final stage of all evil.

In the same way that hobbits enjoying ample meals isn’t treated as a moral flaw, abstinence isn’t particularly notable as a virtue. However, it does come up in forms like Sam noting that lembas provides more endurance as the hobbits rely on it solely in their final journey to Mordor. This indicates that Tolkien regards the ability to go without physical pleasures when necessary as a virtue (also symbolized by Sam’s heartrending decision to give up his cooking gear!) but doesn’t place value on ascetism for its own sake.

If we want to expand on the metaphorical idea of gluttony as overconsumption/destruction, then we can also see healing/restoration as its opposing virtue, in forms like the box of soil that Galadriel gives Sam, which he uses to restore the trees of the Shire.

7. Lust/Romantic Love

Celegorm became enamoured of [Lúthien]...they purposed to let the King perish, and to keep Lúthien, and force Thingol to give her hand to Celegorm.

Beren: Though all to ruin fell the world, and were dissolved and backward hurled, unmade into the old abyss, yet were its making good, for this - the dusk, the dawn, the earth, the sea - that Lúthien for a time should be.

Lust is often regarded simply as a term for physical attraction, and its condemnation as a type of prudishness, but I’m going to present a different take, one that draws on its connection with the two preceding vices (the three are consistently grouped together by Dante). Lust is when the two previous desires, of ownership and consumption/use, are applied not to objects but to a person.

It’s an extremely rare vice among elves, with only a few examples in Elvish history: Celegorm, Eöl, Maeglin. In all cases, there is sexual desire combined with the desire for control, turning to violence when that control is thwarted: Celegorm’s imprisonment of Lúthien in the attempt to force her to marry him, and the later assault on her and Beren; Eöl’s restrictions on Aredhel and murder of her when she leaves him; Maeglin’s attempt to kidnap Idril during the Fall of Gondolin.

In contrast, the examples of romantic love, which are primarily the elf-human couples and especially Beren and Lúthien, combine desire with value for the freedom and identity of the beloved, and with self-sacrifice (or willingness to take on risks) for their sake. Beren’s song before setting out for Angband is a celebration of Lúthien’s existence, irrespective of what may happen to him. Lúthien counters with the expression that she does not want to exist apart from him, and purpose of lovers is to act together and to guard and support each other. Elwing runs through the waves to Eärendil on the shores of Valinor because she would rather face the same risks he does than be safe apart from him. Eärendil accepts immortality for love of Elwing. Arwen accepts death for love of Aragorn.

#tolkien #the silmarillion #the lord of the rings #christianity #ethics #moral philosophy #fëanor #frodo #gandalf #sauron #beren #lúthien #ëarendil #elwing #celegorm #sam gamgee #denethor #faramir #saruman

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proudlylost · 3 years

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My 6+1 favorite SPN fics: AU

After the SPN finale I kinda got sucked back into the fandom. The excessive amount of fanfiction reading ensued (I re-read all of my SPN fic favorites and then some) and I realised I have actually read quite a lot of them. So I thought I could share them, to highlight all the talented authors there is and also to gather all of my favorites into the one place. This post contain my favorite AU fics, the SPN universe edition of this fic rec can be found here.

Ninety One Whiskey by komodobits

“In the spring of 1944, the 104th Medical Battalion of the United States Army is disbanded, and its men reassigned to various infantry companies in preparation for their invasion of occupied France. For First Lieutenant Novak, this is less than helpful, as he has so far met his platoon’s designated medic a grand total of twice, and has both times found Sergeant Winchester to be the optimum combination of reckless, arrogant, and downright insufferable so as to make cohesive platoon function near impossible. When the time comes to move out, however, Castiel has to reconcile himself to the fact that men are going to go down and trust that Dean Winchester may well be the only person who can put them back together again. WW2 ETO infantry AU. “

READ! THIS! Well, there is some really disturbing war related and time period related stuff, but if you can stomach that, read it! Along with the Angel’s Wild, this is my favorite fanfiction. This fic is heart wrenching and so, so good.The characterization is on point. Historical accuracy is on point. Slow burn is on point. Everything is just perfect. However, as I said, this fic is heavy stuff. There is some serious angst (I cried. I almost never cry when reading) and trauma. But there is glimmers of hope, even if sometimes it feels hopeless. Expected recovery time: at least two weeks. Word Count: 401,183. Explicit

Angel’s wild by LimonadeGaby and riseofthefallenone

“But that’s the whole reason he’s here, isn’t it? He’s not out here hunting Humans. He’s not even hunting deer, or bears, or anything else that featured in Bambi. He’s out here, freezing his nuts off every night, because he’s hunting Angels.

Sometimes Dean wishes that Angels were like how they’re described in the Bible. How people from time too old for him to care much about thought Angels were messengers and warriors of God, protectors of Humans. He knows that how they’re really described in the Bible is actually pretty terrifying, but at least they were told by God that they’re supposed to love Humans, right?

That’s a thousand times better than what Angels really turned out to be.”

This was first longer fic that I read from Supernatural fandom and I fell in love. So this is “the fic that got me into the fandom” but I have read it multiple times since and it is still very, very good. I love everything about this fic. It is very original and the lore is amazing. I love how Dean and Cas are both quite young (in Cas’s case, relatively speaking) and how their love develops (slow burn! <3) I love how Cas is described and I love how he communicates (unintentionally) with flowers. You can also read this without having any knowledge of supernatural series (like I did) which is always impressive for a fic. Wor count: 389, 271. Explicit

For All You Young Hockey Players Out There, Pay Attention by thursdaysfallenangel

“Dean Winchester knows two things about hockey, two things his dad made sure he knew. One, hockey is a guy’s sport, and two, hockey is family. Hockey meant Sam and Bobby and Benny and Victor and Gabriel and hell, his entire team. So when Victor gets traded, Russian-star-turned-new-teammate Castiel Krushnic becomes a threat. As much as Dean hates him for that, the longer he sticks around, the more he begins to threaten that first rule too. Dean’s been taught his whole life that those who play hockey should not be captivated by deep accented voices and the way a guy handles his stick, so how the hell is he supposed to justify what he’s starting to think about Cas? All Dean wanted at the beginning of the season was to win, and now all he wants to do is figure out how he feels about Cas and how to deal with it without ruining his career and tearing his family apart. “

Ah, three of my absolute favourite things smashed into the same fic: sports, slow burn and enemies to lovers. This fic has lots of cameos from supernatural characters, because hockey teams require lots of players. So it is easy to spot your favorite character in this fic. This fic is probably one of may favorites, because of the sport environment (Outside the fandom, I have been super into sports. Like so much I have several national championships medals from my sport. Anyway, not a point here): also the sexual tension between Dean and Cas is so good, especially when they are pumped with the adrenaline. You don’t really need to understand sports to enjoy this fic, though. Word count: 143,592. Explicit

Formula Won by cardinalwrites

“Of all the places Castiel Novak thought he would take in his career, an internship as a Formula One Paddock Correspondent (or journalist, for short) was most definitely not one of them for a few reasons. One: He had no clue what the hell Formula One was. Two: He knew nothing about sports in general. And Three: He should not fall in love with the people he’s supposed to be asking hard-hitting questions to, least of all the head driver of one of the oldest and most well-renowned teams in the sport’s history.

This is a love story told around the world through the eyes of the person that knows the least about where he has found himself in. Come follow a 20-race season finding love in the lost, learning the truth, and figuring out what the hell Formula One is along the way.”

Another sports fic with a slow burn. This is probably not everyone’s cup of tea, because there is quite a lot information about formula one, and the reading experience is more enjoyable if already know about formulas/do your research. Don’t let it stop you though, because this fic is very good. The friendship between Dean and Cas is very natural, and later the romance as well. The plot is very engaging and the drama inside the formula one organization is so good. This fic is also not so “heavy” as the other ones in my list (of course, there are problems along the way, but even the fic’s tags say there will be fluff). The rating is T, which is kinda surprising, because I did not notice it until I already had read the whole fic. Word count: 123,777. Teen

Have Love, Will Travel by squeemonster

Castiel Novak is a reclusive writer with a childhood so tragic it's left him terrified to leave his home—until his overbearing brother, Gabriel, drags him out for a night on the town full of booze and strip clubs, and he encounters Dean Winchester, a mesmerizing and mysterious stripper with secrets of his own. Both men find themselves inexplicably drawn to each other, and soon Dean's private dances for Castiel become much more, as both men confess their troubles and find solace in each other's company. But neither can seem to find the courage to take their relationship further than the intimacy of the club's VIP Room—and just when Dean's own brother gives him the excuse he needs to finally admit his feelings, Dean discovers something that brings it all crumbling down. Will they find a way past their demons and their trust issues, and back to each other?

This is one of the fandom classics and quite rightfully so. Both Dean and Cas have issues, in other words: what’s new? The sexual chemistry between them was so good and well written, but there is also angst and mental health issues (mostly Cas). Sam is quite young in this fic, but manages to be very much a little brother. I honestly loved this fic when I was a bit younger, but I think it is still very good and deserves its place in this list. Word count 94,054. Explicit

Pick It All Up by thepinupchemist

Army veteran Castiel Novak is a wreck after his tour in Afghanistan, brought home to his brother's apartment in Lawrence, Kansas with scars both mental and physical. He copes poorly, and during one night of bad decision making, meets somebody just as much of a disaster as he is -- a prostitute named Dean Winchester. And suddenly, two damaged men might not be as irreparable as they believed.

Ah, it seems that I’m incapable of picking nice, fluffy, happy fanfics. This certainly is not one of them. There is full warnings in the tags, because there is some triggering stuff: PTSD, mentions of past abuse, alcoholism etc. But, this is also very healing story in its own way (It has happy ending. I guess I can spoil that because it reads in the tags) . I avoided this fic for a long time, because the prostitute!Dean tag scared me away, but this was so worth of reading (as I said, happy ending)! Gabriel is super supportive and sweet brother and Dean and Cas are dysfunctional but they work so well despite all the trauma they have endured. Word count: 126,611. Explicit

Bonus: Twist and Shout by gabriel and standbyme

What begins as a transforming love between Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak in the summer of 1965 quickly derails into something far more tumultuous when Dean is drafted in the Vietnam War. Though the two both voice their relationship is one where saying goodbye is never a real truth, their story becomes fraught with the tragedy of circumstance. In an era where homosexuality was especially vulnerable, Twist and Shout is the story of the love transcending time, returning over and over in its many forms, as faithful as the sea.

Well, I don’t think this fic needs any introductions. This is the fic, the most popular in SPN fandom and one of the most popular ones in the whole ao3. I thought that I could read this, because I don’t generally have many triggers, despite all the warnings. I was a wreck during reading. And I have managed to read it once and I can’t make myself read it again. But it is good and amazingly written. This fic plucks every emotion out of you and does anything it pleases with them. You have been warned. Word count: 97,556. Explicit

(When I wrote this fic rec I also realised I have a serious problem with long fics. Like, most of my favorites are at least 100,000 words. At this point I think I don’t even consider a fic to be slow burn, unless it takes several days to complete the fic. Oops)

#supernatural fic rec #destiel fic rec #supernatural fanfiction #destiel fanfiction #destiel slow burn #supernatural #destiel

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its-chelisey-stuff · 4 years

Text

‘Love and Redemption’, eps 41-50 (at this point I just feel pain)

I wanna take a moment and address the situation properly: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK SIFENG? YOU DO THIS EVERY.SINGLE.FUCKING.TIME. You sacrifice everything for this woman everytime. You have a 99.9999999 % of disregard for your person is actually a wonder you came this far into life or maybe not if we take into account the other 9 incarnations and the one in heaven.

I can't believe the biggest reason why I love this character so freaking much is also the only reason that makes me mad at him, because it leads to his death, demise, destruction, ending, fin, whatever you want to call it, always. His only flaw is also his biggest strength depending on what day of the week or in which part of the drama he is living.

He loves Xuanji impossibly too much.

I mean... this is a drama that has deities, demons and mortals, all aware of the others' existence. I've seen dragons and weird creatures that rank from adorable to wtf scary. There are mermen who are doctors. Snakes that can turn into people and become spiritual pets!!! All of that is okay by me. I barely react to any of it. Oh, sure, you can fly on your swords? Pretty cool. By far the most fantastical thing on this drama, the one that makes me react with incredulity and wonder, is the love Sifeng feels for Xuanji.

Never ever in a million years could it be true in real life (and not only because of the fantasy elements) but that's the greatest thing about this drama. That's why I love it so much. And it makes me angry.

The whole time on ep 45 when Xuanji almost killed Sifeng by using something her senior gave her, had me screaming in desperation. Xuanji, you moron!! Thank goodness for WuZhiQi.

When the drama started, I kept looking for the big bad TM guy. As I've learned with the few costume cdramas I've seen, villains never show themselves right away. So, I wasn't expecting Dijun to be the crazy manipulating possessive obsessive bitch he turned out to be and I wasn't prepared for how much I was going to hate his character. In these last ten eps, I reached the height of my patience, my sanity limit, and I just really wanted someone to kill him everytime he opened his heavenly mouth. Damn, I wish Sifeng had really done that, instead of just being framed by the crazy bitch.

To me, Yuan Lang nor the star of Mosha are the bad guys. It's him. 100% him. I want OTP to take revenge on him because I fear he is guilty of a lot more than we know. But woud I be lucky enough to have it my way? *sighs*

Listen, I love Tengshe and apparently someone in the drama does as well I said it on my previous post but it's important to say it again because he keeps solving things and moving the plot ahead. This is the kind of character you want introduced (if you need to) later in any story. He went to heaven and snuck onto the forbidden library, snooping on top secret records and even went into Dijun's private chambers, to look for information or any clues on Xuanji and her past. And once he did it he descended to the mortal realm and helped Sifeng stop a catastrophe and even lectured the stupid mortals on their stupidity. On these eps, he was my fave character along with Sifeng.

The mortals are stupid, as I've stated. My Linglong went through a bunch of shit, so I dare not to say anything about her, but what about the rest of the mortals? The sect leaders with their hypocrisy and so called good ways, I almost spit blood from anger lol cdramas would make you say that. But seriously, why is it that no mortal dared to think rationally? Why are they so dumb? Xuanji's driving force in believing Sifeng was her love for him and how much she didn't wanted him to be bad, but she didn't really used her brain to think about the fact that the the evidence and what she knew were contradictory. Oh, Xuanji. You were never the brightest but I always thought your love for Sifeng could work as your conscience. And because of that, you deserved to suffer a bit when you found out how mistaken you were. Karma.

The only resourceful people here are the demons (good and bad). They get things done and I'm so happy that even though Sifeng had a crazy suicide plan that was making every mortal hate him, he had a support system and good friends by his side, that knew the truth and trusted him. Hell, Wu ZhiQi had just met him and he was already saving his life and trying to stop him from doing something crazy spoiler: he failed. These demons were such a heavy contrast with the humans. Is ironic, truly, that the "monster race" was being more honorable and actually using their heads unlike the "civilized" mortals. *Sighs deeply and shakes head* Tragic.

Wasn’t expecting to like Wu ZhiQi so much, so fast, but I do. And he is such a mood! Plus, anyone who likes Sifeng and tries his best to help him, is on my good list.

What a creepy nauseating move, to try to take her away on her wedding day eww disturbing as heck. I don't know what forms of therapy are like in this world, this period of time, but if killing her kidnapper/rapist/stalker is going to help my Linglong heal and put the nightmare behind her, then I cannot tell you how happy I was that it was her, the one who sent him to hell. And I got to see her fight like the badass she is. Please, please, drama. Let her be happy now. She deserves it.

Is so Sifeng of him to try and save Xuanji literally 15 minutes after she just tried to kill him. As angry as I was, I couldn’t help but swoon lol because here he is, desperate to save the woman he loves, no matter what things she’s done. He can’t just stand there and watch her die.

Sifeng fell for Xuanji on the Heavenly realm a thousand years ago! We still don't know the full story, but I was so happy to get a confirmation on it, and do correct me if I'm wrong, but I think Dijun didn't recognize Sifeng? Or maybe he pretended not to? Everybody from 1000 years ago recognizes Xuanji, but no one has done it with Sifeng. And yet, he clearly was there. That's weird, right? I mean, he took a few heavenly lashes for Xuanji. And he freaking was the one to stop her punishment AND he descended after her (more like fell, heh). Who on earth was this guy? Why did he have so much influence or power over what gets to be done about her? I'm not curious anymore. That doesn't describe what I feel. I'm craving for the answer, I need it.

Ah. These two. Maybe this isn't the one sided love I thought it was, after all. Maybe Xuanji did like him before becoming a mortal. But... There are so many things that I still don't get. I got a few answers but also way more questions.

I don't want this story to end, but Sifeng and tbh Xuanji too, have suffered too much already. I gotta say that I wasn't so happy with Xuanji, in fact I was very annoyed with her especially when she drew in a sword through Sifeng's chest wtf but I can't hate this girl and tbh my love for Sifeng is greater than my annoyance/hate towards Xuanji, which means that as long as Sifeng is happy and smiling, I don't care if it's with Xuanji and if she doesn't suffer nearly a half of as much as he does. There has been enough suffering on their tenth reincarnation alone that we don't even need to take into account the other 9 lives. They deserve ALL the happiness in the world.

Hehe but that won't come easily. I'm bracing myself because I think the very worst (and the painful answers) is in the last 9 episodes but hey, it'd be worth it, theres a happy ending. That's what keeps me going 😜

Edit: lmao I just realized that I didn’t talk about the biggest revelation of all, which is that Xuanji is not only the God of War but ALSO the Star of Mosha. How does that even work? Sifeng has tried to investigate and Tengshe as well, but there’s only so much that’s recorded on the official papers, so far they’re the only ones that know the truth and Sifeng’s best bro (who found out bc there’s only one person/reason why Sifeng would ever say he’s the Star of Mosha). Looking forward to finding out the whole story.

#love and redemption #cdrama #cheng yi #crystal yuan #yuan bingyan #chu xuanji #yu sifeng #i don't want this to end

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syrossa · 3 years

Text

REVOLUTION | vkook

[Jungkook x cyborg!Taehyung]

— wordcount: 3.8k

— genre: sci-fi/ action/ oneshot/ angst

— summary: Jungkook is on the side of the Resistance, but his heart belongs to the wicked Emperor's right hand. In a world of war, he'll have to choose between saving his people or the cyborg he's fallen so tragically in love with.

— notes: previously posted on army amino as "trust me not"

Space year 3043.

After seizing the throne of Nypso 773T , its android emperor has decided to exterminate all individuals human - the last bearers of free will still standing. To execute his commands, the order of the New Inquisition has been launched. Its wicked ways continue to terrorize the planet, and many humans have gone rogue to avoid death in Nypso's compression pits. Jeon Jungkook - the latest recruit of the Resistance, has been extracted from an Inquisition's camp after a month of captivity. During his stay there, an unexpected fascination with the order's leader has emerged. Now they're torn between duty and attraction, survival and the dire need of love in the robotic arms of Nypso 773T.

Pulling on his hood, Jungkook walked into the subway station where the mass of the automated proletariat was finally retreating to its charging points. The route of line 248 resonated in a pre-recorded audio in several transgalactic languages; the outdated robots and refugees here couldn't afford infixed translation. The next train was in seven minutes. Working machines were being produced without a sense of smell, so the coolants and liquids of the entire quadrant could drain freely, channelled through the platform. Supreme androids and cyborgs could almost tell the difference between fume-saturated air and waste matter. Humans, however, were bound to sense it.

Jungkook travelled with the scraps of a filtering mask over his nose and mouth.

A heavy overcoat protected him from curious eyes. Down its lackluster length, a multitude of pockets were sewn with the purpose of convenience, but the inner one by his right hip weighed with the wired device of a hologram transmitter. The message encrypted on it was intended for the eyes of the Resistance only, and its safe transportation had been entrusted to him. Was it the shortage of confidants or Jungkook's short, yet exceptional devotion to the cause that had brought him here, he couldn't tell. One thing was certain — danger stalked him somewhere in this crowd and it moved with a bullet's speed, disguised in coy metal. All solitude amongst machines was extirpated.

He wasn't alone.

But the field of his vision allowed him to suspect and nothing more. Between the industrial smog and the firearm fume, the human eye was unable to discern too much. Few instruction panels hung low over the heads of the departees, providing the dimmest of illumination in venom-tinted yellow where the light of all other signs failed to stretch out to. Propaganda scrolled through interconnected displays in the skyscraping height.

As the train arrived in virid smoke, drunkenly quivering atop the rusted rails, the mob prepared for departure, loud and on the verge of an electric collapse. In the midst of it Jungkook joined the aggressive momentum and it hauled him to the doors. The informants from Quadrant-3 had warned him about identification scanners — each entrance had been installed two of those, in addition to a memory-extracting mechanism, so that all workers could be wiped clean of cache; Nypso liked its slaves productive.

Blazingly red, the scanning rays licked the identification numbers off all mechanic forearms. Each number consisted of uniquely stringed digits and Nypsoian letters, irreplicable and theft-proof, unless, of course, forcefully extracted. Yet such force was hardly ever applied reversibly.

So when Jungkook lifted his sleeve, baring the tattooed numerals on vulnerable display, he knew he had engraved himself with the ink and blood of another.

Collateral damage, they'd call it — the dismantled, maimed anthropomorphic remains of those who had been sacrificed for the camouflage of the Resistance. Through the scanners and the all-seeing surveillance apparatus Jungkook slithered like a ghost, a phantom of matter but never of face. He seated himself in the vacancy of a secluded section at the back of the train, and watched as the vehicle resurfaced overground.

The halved star of Nypso 337T had begun to roll out of sight. Space wind evaded the thin synthetic atmospheric layers, bringing forth what the code specifics referred to as frostnip. Nights here began with euphoria, beauty amid the blistered flesh of the universe, but escalated just as abruptly. Thousands of beings fell victims to the unforgiving cold. The corpses would be disposed of in the vast abyss of the Omicron Galaxy and left to the mercy of the antigravity and destructive cyclones. Sometimes parts of them would fall back on Nypso with the acid torrents.

The cadaverous rains.

Upon crossing the interquadrant border, the train entered a zone of electric anomaly, causing all working robots to cease operating. Jungkook rose from his uncomfortable seat immediately. He was quick on his feet; he headed to the emergency exit in the back. Moving across a high-up, scaffold-like railway with speed disproportionate to its poor technicity, the vehicle was to reach a rail intersection in a matter of minutes — the only window he'd be provided for a secure escape. The man clutched the transmitter through the fabric of the overcoat. A flicker of utter fright glistened in his eyes, the one a madman's irises would produce before he jumps off to death.

A madman, yes, but not alone in his madness.

Because when he threw himself forth in the open air, he knew he would land in the hands of his allies, the members of the Resistance. With a thump and several Nypsoian curses, Jungkook was caught by an aircraft of the forces from Quadrant-4. The second he regained balance, the pressure in his lungs and brain dispersed to free space for relief. General Kim dismissed the crew to greet him.

He grinned. "Lucky to see you here today. We barely managed to get the plane off the ground with the low temperatures."

"Thank you, sir. Captain Jung wasn't lying 'bout your piloting."

"Don't thank me. Min over there conducted the maneuvers today, the lucky bastard." And Jungkook glanced at the back of the pilot's disheveled head, hair chopped and jet black. "Do you have it?"

Derivative of the devices from before the last technological purge, the hologram transmitter was an antique of its own, coded in a long-lost language. It was technically unhackable. The greatest legacy of its predecessors, though, was the function of restricted access, touch-activated to be precise. When the device came into contact with General Kim's palm, trillions of holographic particles erected the glowing, mapped structure of a hollow sphere.

"The core powerhouse!" Jungkook gasped.

"A precise, high-resolution map of the planet's life source. After all these years of gathering data and risking the wellbeing of our entire kind, it's finally complete. We have the key to taking the emperor down, kid." The corner of the General's mouth quirked up. "We have it."

As if prompted by the glimpse of hope, the graspable salvation of mankind, intermittent flashes of red spread like rashes on the titanium insides of the plane while alarms were triggered in the cockpit. Jungkook tripped as the aircraft went into a sudden dive.

The co-pilot cried out, "Enemy crafts, sir. Attempters FM-14, annihilation mode engaged."

"Min, can you make it to the headquarters?" Kim shouted, tying himself to a seat by the plane wall.

Jungkook was still upright, shifting his weight as if hoverboarding. His eyes followed the attackers as the unmanned Attempters deployed their missiles. With a target on its silver hull, the plane of the Resistance forces looped and spiralled between the Quadrant-4 blockscape similarly to a turbulent projectile. But before even managing to be vocal about the pilot's nonpareil skills, he glimpsed the violent gush of blood from Min's shoulder.

Jungkook yelled, "Captain, you're fucking bleeding!"

"I am?," Min shrugged, reducing the throttle from the plane's inversion, motions still as steady as a surgeon's. "About time I showed these can-openers I can beat them single-handedly."

"The Resistance has evaded all attacks again, commander. I must say the human persistence is exhausting me already."

Left arm spasming from damage, Taehyung replied tremulously, "I dispatched two of our best Attempters their way. They must've anticipated an onrush."

Next to the mechanical grandness, the soul-breaking presence of the emperor, Taehyung appeared like a solitary speck of steel; a cyborg utterly defenseless against his superior. He was second to his leader; the right hand of the radically unique conqueror of Nypso 337T and scion of the mighty Omicron race — undoers of time and space. To support his position and survival, he had been recruited as commander of the New Inquisition.

Over the metal of his palms, there was overmuch human blood. The emperor, however, was still unsatisfied with its amount.

"Their defense cannot withstand our supremacy much longer. Can you perhaps figure out why, commander? Why is humankind bound to die out?"

Some deeply buried piece of Taehyung shattered, knowing that the battle he'd deliberately spared the humans was nothing but a hurdle in the long run of their eradication. All his efforts to decelerate the inevitable — governed not by the remains of his anthropoid body but by those of his human mind — were, ultimately, futile. He'd reset the coordinates of the Attempters, encrypted the outdated frequencies of the Resistance, screened the infiltration of their informant, but at what cost? He hadn't given them advantage but mere false hope.

"Because of its will, of course. The free will of humans will lead them to their ultimate end. But first, it will lead them to me." The android's speech was toneless through the holographic projection, yet his virtual presence diminished all strength of the commander's. "Our high-rank infiltrator in the Resistance has information that an assault on the powerhouse is being plotted. I want all units in position tomorrow. The rebellion must be eliminated instantly."

"Through a strengthened line of defense?"

"A lethal one. There must be no survivors. Obey your system, commander, and your emperor."

"Yes, Your Imperial Majesty."

Bowing to the conquerer of worlds might have felt elevating once; it may have propelled pride, safety and life, yet it only sparked misery in the metal now. Once the hologram had dispersed, Taehyung collapsed in a stroke of electric current. The fine components of his bionic system had experienced pressure unfit for his outdated build, which happened often when machines failed a designated mission. The scheme with the Attempters would cost him pain unlike any other. Pain of both flesh and robotics.

It took him twelve full minutes to regain consciousness. When he finally did, the back of his brain was burnt to charcoal black, as if he could only recall the excruciation of being electrocuted and nothing before it. He was a high-ranking Nypsoian soldier, a breed of hominid warrior blood and light steel tempered in the titanium core of the star of Adastreia, and he remembered his own pain only. Little by little, bits of data deteriorated within him and memories faded away like flashes of a time long-gone.

He was slowly being erased.

Everything he'd done to protect the man he loved on the other side of law backfired right at him. Instead of saving humanity, he slowly ceased to be human.

He needed to hear his voice more than ever.

Even if he couldn't quite retrieve the sound of it.

The jittery projection of Jungkook's face illuminated the entirety of the bunker, and his eyes bore into Taehyung's, expectant, laden with horror. Each of their rare conversations would begin with shared silence. Life was a variable — both had to be prepared for it to assume its last value at any given moment. The signal was horridly damaged as both sides had dialed from their underground hideaways, one right beneath the emperor's throne room, and the other from the fortified catacombs of Quadrant-4.

"I'm sorry I couldn't call earlier, I--"

Jungkook forced a lopsided smile, enough to hurt but not to discourage. "It's okay. You called."

"Are you alright? The Attempters went close and by the time I seized remote control, they'd fired at one of yours. The pilot."

"Min. He's fine. I guess he'd seen worse than your machine guns," The man chuckled softly. "Man, he even fired back, one hand on the panel, and the other holding a BL-544 out the perforated windshield."

Then Jungkook burst into laughter, lighthearted and paranormally unfit in the midst of the misery of all else. His eyes translated into blueish pixels, so Taehyung could barely visualize the mottle of dark-brown and grey they were in the light, or the dual glint of gravely seriousness and daredevilry inside them. At times like this, it was the eyes that made him feel entirely human. His eyes.

Elated for a brief second, Taehyung said, "I wish I could see you. I think my memory is being messed up with, and I'm starting to forget you."

"That's why we call, right? So we don't forget who the real enemy is."

Who was the real enemy?

"They're planning an attack on the core. The arsenal should be distributed by tomorrow at noon, but it'll be no surprise if you already knew that," said Jungkook, voice suddenly thicker. "What's been ordered to the defense forces?"

"A direct confrontation, fast and brutal. He wants all units charged and ready to dispatch anyone at sight. I'll try to talk him out of the melee but I don't know how much I can do about it."

"You've done more than enough already. Just...stay safe. Whole, preferably."

"Okay, I told you, what happened in Apus was an accident. It was a one-time thing. One. Time!"

Jungkook chortled, having Taehyung join him shortly after, both high on the feeling of detachment from everything and everyone. It was the two of them in this conversation, in this little world of theirs, free from barriers and pain and tyranny.

"You too," Taehyung said. "Stay safe."

"Will do. I'll see you at the end of the world, right?"

"See you then. Hey, Jungkook, I just wanted to tell yo--"

But the signal was cut off and the picture turned grainy with empty pixels all of a sudden. The muffled aggression of bangs and kicks brought down the door of Taehyung's secluded bunker and a horde of his own inquisitors rushed in, driven by electricity, bloodthirst and imperial will. The cyborg was taken hold of.

His heavy body writhed in the intruders' grip, but to no avail. In the distance he overheard his former inferiors repeat the protocol of his detainment. Only one kind of seizure required the full unrelenting force of the Inquisition androids.

The one coming directly from the emperor.

As the Resistance soldiers advanced farther into the outer Core, the grip on their assault rifles weakened, wet from the heat accumulated, bewildered by the void of the empty powerhouse. The pulsating, current-pumping heart of Nypso operated under a dome of steam and titanium systems. In its veins surged the lifeblood of an entire civilization, the supreme vigor of the Nypsoian predatory machine and the technology behind its expansive aggression.

Today its heartbeat would flatline once and for all.

Jungkook carried a Proxima L-90 — a relevantly ugly, simple ray weapon meant to inflict moderate damage — with the back of it braced against his underarm, holding the shadows at gunpoint. His face burned under a filtering mask, yet the odds of being violently poisoned were too great to succumb to convenience. Fire in his ribs and steel in his brain, he moved forward.

The promised confrontation of the emperor's forces never happened. General Kim signalled for all units to stand down.

"The motion sensors show movement in our perimeter. 100 meters ahead, 50 sources," he whispered. "Charge your weapons."

But in Jungkook that sparked suspicion so bothersome it twisted his insides, made him want to vomit. Fifty defenders appointed at the most significant structure on the planet — something didn't seem — didn't feel — right. Yet his trust in Taehyung lay unquestioned. He'd spoken to him about a frontal attack and a frontal attack was to be. Nothing but those words could force him forward.

Nothing but the belief that today could change the universe forever.

A swarm of androids emerged from the depths of the powerhouse, wearing imperial armour. They imitated human forms, carried themselves in a human manner, but didn't hesitate in their stride, unlike the Resistance whose fear pierced it through. These were machines without faces, painted in the colors of war and destruction, forged with no soul and no purpose but murder; the inquisitors. And when they charged onwards, every being of flesh shivered in frail mortality. The androids opened immediate fire.

However, the fifty of them were not alone. More crawled out of the corners, the corridors, and every spot dark became a black portal spitting inquisitors. In seconds the Resistance forces were severely outnumbered.

Back against General Kim's, Jungkook tore apart enemies with ray projectiles with insufficient speed. Like demons from neon and metal, like nightmares flooding the innocent mind, the androids burst forth and immobilized the formation of the rebellion. Soon enough, the man was fighting machines with electrocuting blades and bare hands.

"I'm almost out of ammo. We need to get to the main generator and place the bomb," the General shouted as he shot an inquisitor's head through, thus releasing Jungkook from his grip.

"We gotta make our way through."

"I'll help with that!" With one arm immobilized and the other on the trigger of a close-range blaster, Min approached the two. His stubbornness had earned him a spot in the field forces today, but his injury must've weighed him down.

The captain, though, was a survivor.

"Run!" Min cried. "I'll blast whatever follows you."

Jungkook and the General sprinted forward that instant, too overwhelmed with gunfire and smoke and adrenaline to take in the sight of the captain relentlessly throwing himself into the crossfire. As they cleaved the imperial horde, as they fired and slashed their way through — fruits of the flesh in the unhomogenous battle broth — he held back their pursuers for as long as he could. The shrill vox of Min's blaster quietened while they ran, and so did the remainder of the fight, distant but heavy on the brain.

At some point, Jungkook found himself utterly lost in the hypnosis of metal and screams.

Kim snapped him out when they reached a dead end at a corridor intersection. The map led to a hatch in the floor, then to an underground space where the generator was located. When Jungkook pulled the horizontal door open, the General jumped onto the grated platform it revealed. Nightmarish shivers creeped under the former's skin as if on the brim of something horrible and irreversible. Something of monumental grandness, yet something hellbound had been released with their appearance in the Core. Unaware of its specifics, Jungkook descended shortly after, shaken by the feeling of death pricking on his bare nape.

"We have to be quick," General Kim whispered. "The bomb will create an electromagnetic pulse that will disarm all electric systems on the planet. It must be as close to the core as we can get it, so be prepared to do whatever it takes for this to work. Promise me that, Jungkook."

The man wanted to stutter, to assure his comrade that the Resistance is once again in luck and prevailing. But empty promises had no place in his head anymore. Rather, they belonged in the ashes of the man he used to be once; of the world he once used to live in. His answer came pure of all boyish naiveness.

"I promise, sir."

"Good. This way."

Monochrome light, combat boots against the platform. They travelled in silence and dark anticipation. The generator came in sight several meters after, oblivious in its lifeless shell of titanium and wire. The two men entered the holy premises of the inner Core like only heartsick worshippers would — with their heads craving redemption above all.

The bomb was wrapped in cloth — a hastily packaged weapon of mass destruction. The General stripped it bare. His face twitched in untimely satisfaction as he carried it to the top of the generator, whose size extended kilometers under the ground, highest point peaking through a cavity in the grates.

But as the General was activating the mechanism, a splashed, abstract pattern of his blood printed itself onto Jungkook, who remained paralyzed steps away. The laser projectile went right through Kim, exiting his torso clean of guilt and hesitation.

The younger pointed his gun at the distance, at the wide, half-human frame of the attacker, tears in his eyes as he came in the luminescent light.

"Jungkook, put the gun down, please--"

Buy everything within him screamed. "Stand back! I'm warning you! Stand back or I'll fucking shoot you."

Jungkook glanced at the sprawled body of General, eyes then set on Taehyung again. He went feral, wild with betrayal and shock that his mortal stomach could feast on for days. They held each other at gunpoint, lovers in the grip of a war unfought.

"Sir, stay with me. Just hold on."

"Jungkook, listen to me. Put your gun down. Now!"

"No, you listen to me! What have you done?! We've been fighting for this for so long and now that we have a chance to change everything, you turn against your own. We are on the same side, you fool! Help me save him!"

"I'm afraid I can't," Taehyung replied, voice stern like never before. "I can't help you anymore. I've done so much for humans and I've never been one, never will be. I am who I am and I've picked a side already. I picked the one I belong to."

"I thought we belonged together."

The bomb lay semi activated next to Kim. All that stood between it and Jungkook was his unwavering machine of a lover, the leader of the Inquisition with only half flesh, half heart. And neither of the two were willing to surrender now.

Not when the love of each was at stake.

"We can't both leave this room, Jungkook. One of us will have to shoot. It's either me or you on the count of three."

"I would've died and killed for you!"

"One."

"I wanted a future with you, Taehyung!"

"Two."

"I loved you!"

"Three. I still do."

And Jungkook collapsed, trapped between the corpses of his friend and lover, finger on the trigger that had failed to protect the former and ended the latter. Tears welled in his black eyes as he enabled the electromagnetic explosive.

The faith of the universe rested in his unsteady hands. His whole world, however, had fallen cold in his feet.

In the very last seconds of Nypso, he wished to have never set foot on the goddamned planet of death and destruction.

#bts #vkook #taekook #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #scifiandfantasy #oneshot #jungkook #taehyung #bts jungkook #bts taehyung #bts au fic #bts au fanfic #vkook au

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sometimesrosy · 4 years

Note

I know you do not trust spoilers, but have you seem OH’s pinned post? The sounds of one scene? Any thoughts?

yup. sounds like them. i think it might be real. or real with some alterations. i think oh is playing a game of two truths and a lie so that they can give real spoilers, but make us doubt their veracity. they said they were fake but I can’t get past how many real spoilers they were right about. that were not really guessable. the claim that they are “psychic” is part of the game. one of the lies. so it the statement that they’re fake. although telling us to believe them but don’t trust them is real.

this is what i’ve been telling you guys all along. NEVER take social media or reviewers or academics who tell you they know all or jr’s interviews as canon.

The only canon is the show on screen. Because even people who DO know what happened may not be telling you the truth, may have ulterior motives, may have a biased perspective that alters their interpretation, may be fudging their words, may simply be stating an opinion about canon rather than canon itself which allows multiple interpretations. Or whatever. Even word of god is suspect.

After it’s over, we can go back over and check to see how many of those academics or reviewers or actors or writers or JR himself make statements that seem true to the canon as it is broadcast. Knowing WHY the writers’ room made choices may clarify the meaning.

But one of the biggest questions we’ve had is “Is Bellarke intended to be romantic?” And even when we get an answer at the end and they are happy ever after, or bittersweet endgame, or they confess their love but one of them dies, or they never do end up kissing/confessing/sexing-- we can still interpret “are bellarke intended to be romantic?” Because some romances end as tragedies, a la Romeo and Juliet, or the love story of the sun and the moon, who forever circled around each other never to meet. Still a love story. But a mythic one. Which this one is. And we’ve seen them kind of represented as earth and stars, or sun and moon... but we’ve also seen them represented as Odysseus and Penelope... which IS a mythic love story that DOES end in well, I think it ends in getting back together in the marital bed, no? Anyway. What I’m saying is that both a tragic ending and a getting down and dirty ending can be seen as mythic, epic love stories in history, and there are ways Bellarke could fit both.

I think season 4 was the ending that did fit the “never to meet sun and moon lovers.” And then they came back together and it was almost a new story with a romantic love triangle element.

I’ve gone off track. This is about OH. OH is fun to read and to compare to canon and my own interpretations.

ALL extra-textual commentary is unreliable and NOT canon. Whether it’s JR in an interview or OH (who some [me] speculate to be JR engaging with fans and drumming up excitement and mystery.) All spoiler accounts are unreliable because we don’t know if they have an ulterior motive, like wanting to hurt Bellarke fans (a LOT of spoilers are intentionally trying to do this and have been since s3. they want to kill bellarke and make bellarkers suffer and they only have the ability to do this to the extent that we believe them-- when the are fake or manipulating evidence to SEEM as if bellarke is dead.)

Listen, y’all live in this world. You see what the media and politicians and fandom can do to truth, reality and canon. You see how they twist things to make people BELIEVE what they want to believe. You see how they use their audience’s worst impulses, their fear, their hatred, their bigotry, to lead them down dark paths.

We are not safe from that manipulation in a fandom. Sure there’s no reason for people to lie and manipulate us because it’s not real. But they don’t care. They care that much, they’ve created that kind of war so that it all depends on who believes what twitter account and who gets to be pure and righteous and who gets to be labelled as demon.

I know because I was labelled as demon by some of the people who are STILL out there trying to make us believe bellarke is platonic, B/E is endgame and L is coming back so CL will have the epic love story ending that they wanted in season 3.

#the 100 #opponents heir #myth #epic love story #which is it?#tragedy? comedy? somewhere in the middle?

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theholycovenantrpg · 3 years

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CONGRATULATIONS, ALYX! YOU’VE BEEN ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF ARAEL.

Admin Rosey: Oh god, I think Arael was one of the characters that caught me by surprise. But the absolutely mastery of this application, did not at all surprise me because only Arael could - and should - be so effortlessly captured within the span of a single application. Tragedy, as you said Alyx, is woven into Arael’s bones and the fact that they recognize it and are so unbroken by it in their countenance says absolutely everything to me. The plots that you have lined up only feed into that tragedy more and I, for one, am absolutely here for it. I think that Arael is ripe for evolving and I completely trust this beautiful starlit character in your capable and loving hands. Please create and send in your account, review the information on our CHECKLIST, and follow everyone on the FOLLOW LIST. Welcome to the Holy Land!

OUT OF CHARACTER

Alias | Alyx

Age | Taylor Swift vc: Idk about you, but I’m feeling 22!

Personal Pronouns | She/Her.

Activity Level | hopefully pretty active? I have work and classes but I’m taking less hours and my internship is done so I’m hoping I have more time to be on the dash.

Timezone | CST.

Triggers | REMOVED

How did you find the group? | I saw plenty of ads for it on my personal.

IN CHARACTER

Character |

Arael: “Lion of God”; She couldn’t remember her original name. Her memories of the cold abyss of the galaxy came to her in bits and pieces that she latched onto as one would latch onto an extended hand. She could remember that feeling of peace within her falling star. She could remember that acceptance as her annihilation came nearer. She could remember the rage and melancholy that took over her being as she opened her eyes and examined the wings that protruded from her back and the knowledge that her destiny was ripped away from her. The name Arael was a reminder of that original loss. She was never supposed to be a lion of god. She was never supposed to be an angel stuck on Earth. God had claimed her for himself. He claimed her to be a lion, and all she could do was set her icy gaze on her surroundings and roar until her voice grew hoarse and the burning in her chest faded away.

What drew you to this character? |

To be honest, I lurked on the admins’ blogs as the RP was originally being promoted. I tend to search for characters I like by quotes and images posted to their tag, and there was one quote on Arael’s tag that caught my attention. I don’t remember what exactly it said, but I knew it meant Arael was a character I needed to keep my eye on.

I love characters with tragedy built into their bones. There’s something so compelling about a character going through hardships and how they react to those hardships. Arael’s power alone showed me that she was a tragic character. To be able to hold everyone’s hope in your hand aside from your own? It seemed like a twisted gift from fate. As I read more, I realized that she was a creature of tragedy. She was pulled from the night sky against her own will. She was made into god’s image without her consent, and forced to endure the knowledge that she had lost her home and her destiny. She stared at the night sky, but she was never truly able to go back to her original home.

I like playing around with grief and how it impacts a character. I like seeing if they drown in their feelings, or if they rise above the grief and move forward with their lives. I think Arael is drowning in her grief. She’s stuck in this tunnel of rage and revenge that will consume her if she’s not careful. She’s blinded by this need, and I find that incredibly interesting to explore. Will she burn out? Will she start a war between the three parties? We’ll have to see.

Her story also kind of reminded me of Buffy Summers from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Not in a direct way, but there was a storyline where Buffy died and her friends brought her back from heaven and Buffy talked about being in peace before they brought her back. Arael being torn from her fate and made into an angel reminds me of that. The melancholy and grief they both felt from being ripped away from their rightful place. The way everyone notices that mourning. It gave me parallels.

What future plots do you have in mind for the character? |

“Why are you full of anger? Because you are full of grief.”

→ She was happy. For so long, Arael didn’t know what that feeling entailed. She had looked upon her existence as a punishment. She stared at the realm of heaven and only saw a jail cell. Her body was crafted by god, yet all she felt was unfamiliar in her own skin. Uriel had changed that. She had brought a smile to the otherwise stoic angel’s face. She was warmth wrapping itself around Arael’s cold heart. She was that flicker of hope that Arael felt in other people. She was hers, and someone had ripped that away from her. As she stared into her lover’s empty gaze, all she could think about was doing the same to whoever had killed her. She will rip the world apart if that’s what it took to satisfy the grieving of her heart. The only question will be: who will be spared in the end?

A big part of Arael is her dealing with that loss of her lover and that need for vengeance. I definitely want to explore her seeking out the answers to the murder. I want to see her dragging suspects to be interrogated in the hope that one day the right person will tell her what she wants to know. I want her to endanger innocent lives in her quest for justice. I want her to be so consumed with rage and grief that either herself or others get harmed in the process. She is a star on a collision path, and I want her to burn and burn out during this journey. Most of all, I want her to find the person who did it. I want her to find them, and I want her to kill them. It's the only way for her to be satisfied. It’s the only way for her to put her grief behind her and search for that glimpse of hope again

“You turn the pain into power.”

→ To some, her powers seemed like a blessing. To be able to hold onto someone’s greatest hope was to understand what truly made someone feel at ease. It was the way their eyes sparkled whenever their favorite person walked in a room. It was the passion that would surge through an individual during that last battle of a war. It was a glimpse behind the mask that people often wore, and Arael held all that at her fingertips. To her, this power was another way fate mocked her. She could feel what people’s greatest hopes were. She could fill them up with so much hope that they would be blinded by that desire. She could do so much for other people, but it would never be done for her. She couldn’t fill herself up with that hope. She couldn’t understand that blinding urge that she gave out. What does one do with a gift that serves to remind someone of the very thing they’re lacking?

I want to explore the depths of her power. I think that there’s more to be discovered with her abilities, and I want her to discover exactly what she can do with her gift of hope. I want her to see if her power could be used in the opposite direction. Could she drain someone of their hope? Could she blind someone with utter hopelessness to the point that they see nothing but their dreams slipping from their grasp? I think it would be a dangerous discovery if it were possible. I would also like to see a situation where her gift is irreversible— whether it be gifting hope or taking it away. Perhaps anger clouds her abilities and she over exerts her gift. Perhaps she’s trying to find an ounce of her own hope by filling someone up with so much hope that they become a shell of their former self. I want to push her powers to its limits, and I want Arael to see what sort of consequences are dealt from that discovery.

“You allow your anger to blind you.”

→ Arael’s been in a fragile state since the death of Uriel. To feel the small hint of hope get ripped out of her hands by an unknown assailant left her in a state of brokenness. She’s blinded by this ideal that she’ll be satisfied with vengeance. She has it built up in her mind that the death of this assailant will bring her the peace that she almost had with Uriel—- the same peace that was ripped away from her by god. What do others feel about this mentality? Do they find it foolish? Do they understand her mentality? Or perhaps they see an opportunity hidden behind those aching eyes?

I want to explore the concept of manipulation with Arael. I’m usually not fond of manipulation plots, but I feel like Arael’s in such a vulnerable state right now that it might be possible. I want someone to see that anger and despair. I want someone to see this utterly terrifying, broken angel and use it to their advantage. She’s the perfect weapon if used correctly. Her tunnel vision for revenge could easily be directed towards someone’s enemy if they whispered the right words to her. She could start a war if the correct side twisted her enough. I want to see her revenge used for someone’s personal plans. Maybe she kills an innocent person because she was led to believe they were present during her lovers death. Maybe she drags an innocent victim to Abaddon because she was led to believe they had valuable information. I want to see that manipulation, and I want to see the fallout of it.

“You reach for a soul that forever escapes your grasp.”

→ Arael loved Uriel, or at least it was the closest she ever got to love. The angel had gifted her a slice of hope that she had lacked since her creation, and Arael has been seeking a semblance of that hope since her departure. She feels lost, like she was back to her first years as a star-turned-angel, and she hates that feeling. She hates the emptiness that fills her heart as she watches the mortals her companion once adored. She hates the way she feels so distant from the other angels. Most of all, she hates that their love story ended so abruptly. She misses her with every fiber of her being. One often wonders what they would have their final words be to a loved one, but what if she could have that do over? What if she could catch a glimpse of her again?

I want her to approach Ryuk about contacting her dead lover’s soul. I think there’s a variety of reasons why she would want to talk to Uriel again. I think the most basic one would be that she wants to see her again—- even if it’s only through Ryuk’s words. This was the one person that broke her out of her shell and showed her that the world was worth more than mourning. The most plot related reason would be that she can ask her what her last memory was. Arael has exhausted her options when It comes to possible suspects, so perhaps Uriel could remember who was around during her death or who even caused her to perish. I also like the thought of Uriel advising her against this revenge quest, and Arael refusing to listen. She doesn’t realize that this isn’t what her lover would’ve wanted. She doesn’t realize that she’s doing more harm than good. It’s overall a more personal plot, but it’s good development for her and helps lead to either her collapse or her breakdown at realizing what she’s becoming.

“Anger was better than tears.”

→ Mortals were the envy of God’s creations. Angels were tasked with protecting them like a dragon protects its treasures. They razed cities, enacted miracles, all for the species that found favor in God’s eyes. Arael was never a mortal. She never understood the significance of their kind. She had no attachments to the beings aside from those tasks formerly given to her. She didn’t care for them like Caphriel did. She didn’t despise them as others might. Her feelings towards them might be classified as indifference. However, the stance changed after the death of Uriel. Eyes that might have had a glimpse of care for the beings shifted into anger at the thought of one of them murdering her beloved. Eyes that casually looked over the beings stuck to watching them with careful eyes. One human in particular has gotten caught within her storm. The question is: will she shatter the tentative peace that held the world together? Perhaps a bigger question is: will she have any regrets if she does?

Personally, I find the thought of Arael killing Bastien quite sexy. This would be completely up to the Bastien player, but even if it didn’t go that far, I still love the connection. I like the thought of Arael breaking that peace between the three factions. She sees Bastien as this arrogant fool, and she’s bothered by his position of power. How does her Uriel, gentle and kind, die while men like him thrive? It frustrates her. I’d like to see her knock him from his place at the table. Whether this be done through violence or jeopardising his spot amongst the ten would be up to the Bastien player and what they feel comfortable with, but I can work with either one. Arael’s desperate for some sort of vengeance. I think the more she struggles to find the one who killed Uriel, the one she’ll lean into these desires to destroy someone else, and Bastien is the unfortunate victim of her wrathful gaze.

“You’re a being of isolation.”

→ She is the only one of her kind. No one else knows what it’s like to live amongst the stars. No one else knows what it’s like to be plucked from the night sky and recreated in someone else’s image. No one knows the loneliness that comes with such a fate. The other angels are her brethren, her allies, but they don’t relate to her on that level. She’s a solitary creature, a lone star stuck wandering the earth, and it’s a painful existence. Will she ever figure out that some stars lay in clusters? Will she ever realize that she has the opportunity to shed that loneliness? It’s hard to say. It’s hard to pull herself out of the isolation that she chose from the start.

I want to explore her dynamic with the other angels. I think Arael struggles with connecting to them due to her origins. She doesn’t have that connection of being formed from the Earth or reborn as an angel. She’s different from the others, and that caused her to separate herself. I want to see how they take her quest of revenge. Surely some of them were close with Uriel, maybe even close with Arael, so perhaps they would support the mission. On the other hand, I’d love to see that disapproval. I want to see them trying to temper her anger only to be met with an icy glare. I’d love to see someone try to talk her down from her grief. She’s blinded by this mentality of an eye for an eye, but she doesn’t realize how that affects her fellow angels. I want them to show her how it affects them. Let them get caught in the crossfires of her vengeance. Let them struggle to pull her away from the brink. I think the angels quietly realizing that this fallen angel, this hollowed soul, might do some real damage would be delicious to watch.

Are you comfortable with killing off your character? | Absolutely!

IN DEPTH

Driving Character Motivation |

They say the story of Arael is a tragic one. She was a burning star plucked from the sky and formed into god's image. She was placed among the angels, meant to stand holy and divine alongside her new brethren, yet she found herself standing alone. This angels story isn’t built on blessings. Her story isn’t a fairytale told to the young mortals in an attempt to sooth them to sleep. No, her tale is built on loss, and that’s what motivates her throughout her journey.

Her original loss is the loss of her original destiny. She was stripped of her purpose, ripped away from her original form and forced into a foreign body. She stared at her reflection and a stranger peered back at her. She examined her wings and only saw the fragments of her former self embedded within her feathers. She destroyed cities on God’s behalf, and yet all she could feel was a hollowness in her chest. Loss was her mentality within this point. That acknowledgment of what she’s become and how to endure that was her guiding factor in her initial years of life as an immortal being.

The next stage of loss was the loss of her hopelessness. Uriel had dragged her away from that hole she tucked herself in. The fellow angel opened her eyes to the possibilities of life, and for the first time, Arael’s world wasn’t a bleak landscape. She had color in her vision. She had a slight light in her eyes. Her smile wasn’t forced. She was learning what it was like to look at life as an adventure rather than a chain wrapped around her ankle. This stage of loss was a good thing. It was a stage of growth for the distant angel. She lost that depression that overcame her during her early years. She lost that emptiness that had wrapped itself around her like a blanket.

This latest stage of loss is the cruelest of them all. This burning star, this cold-eyed angel was finally learning the most human of experiences: death. She felt that small sliver of hope rip away from her as she held Uriel’s prone form in her arms. Her body shook with anger as she realized she was once again alone. Her motivation stems from the impact of that loss and the grief that nestled inside her heart. She’s driven to revenge. Her eyes are blinded by the need to punish the person that ripped that hope from her. A part of her knows this is a dangerous path. She knows what happens to stars that burn too brightly. Yet, the loss keeps her locked in its grasp. If she is to burn out, if she is to be destroyed, let it be with the knowledge that she has conquered the loss that has been trailing after her for years.

In-Character Para Sample |

“I brought another one.”

The history behind her statement was not lost on her. Each week she’d latch onto a lead. Each week she’d drag them into the heart of the black cells. Each week she’d watch Abaddon pull out any sort of answers they might have buried in their chest. Each week she’d feel the bitterness of disappointment settle on her tongue as she realized she reached another dead end. It ended the same every time. It couldn’t end the same way this time.

Her eyes traced over the features of her latest endeavor. His porcelain skin and almost white hair reminded her of Uriel, but the resemblance wouldn’t help him out of his fate. She had plucked him out of the crowd in hopes that he had any recollection of that fateful night. With each individual, She wanted a direction. She felt herself grasping at ghosts as the figures from her memory dwindled, and this feeling of loss was becoming all too familiar.

She released her hold on the boy and watched him try to scramble his way out of the cells. Mortals always seemed to have that reaction. Their fight or flight kicked in, trying to make sense of the location they were forced into, before finally realizing the fight was for nothing. They will leave once she gets the answers she’s seeking.

And yet, the boy wasn’t providing those answers. She watched him endure the torture despite the pain it brought him. She watched him fighting back tears, denying pain until it couldn’t be denied anymore, and yet still the answers remained behind clenched teeth.

“Again.”

Her voice was strong as she stared at the bleeding, frightened human before her. She refused to accept that she had reached another dead end. She clung to her quest with sharp claws, and she refused to release her grip for even a second. She was a vengeful angel, a flame with no mercy in sight, and all would endure the burning until she felt satisfied.

Her eyes flicked upwards to meet Abaddon’s, but she didn’t turn away. She didn’t care if the demon saw the hurt in her eyes or the flash of desperation that would spill out every time a mortal came to her with no answers. Maybe the demon had the same look when they got tossed out of god’s favor. Arael didn’t ask. Their relationship wasn’t built on sharing stories or reminiscing over almost forgotten memories. Their relationship was a mutual understanding--- a knife and the being that wields the instrument.

“Do it again until I say otherwise.” Do it again until I can hold any sort of answers in my hand. Do it again until the ache in my chest disappears for a second.

Arael watched the mortal flinch at Abaddon’s nod with cold, unfazed eyes. The scream that erupted from the boy’s mouth would make others grieve, but it only reminded her of the hollowness inside of her. She felt nothing as she watched the pain on his face. She felt only her own rage trying to crawl out of her chest. Perhaps this is what it meant to be a star. Perhaps this was her destiny all along---- to burn from the inside out until nothing but a hollow shell remained.

And perhaps she’ll succumb to her destiny, but only after the grieving in her heart is satisfied. She’ll burn up, but she’ll bring the person responsible for her demise with her.

Extras |

Inspo tag: https://elidclochan.tumblr.com/tagged/insp%3A-arael

Pinterest board: https://www.pinterest.com/aesthctics/insp-arael/

#accepted #accepted: arael

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hamliet · 4 years

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The World is Cruel, Beautiful, and Chiastic

Or, because I see people talking about this and I wrote this during Tokyo Ghoul:re’s final arc (which ended up being accurate), I wanted to be a nerd and outline just what Shingeki no Kyojin’s chiastic structure is.

A chiastic structure is a narrative structure used for millennia in storytelling. It refers to a paralleling structure, wherein events or motifs parallel other events and motifs. If you chart it out, it forms a chiasm or a ring (depending on if you feel like charting a triangle or a circle. (It’s also referred to as ring structure if you go with the latter; hence “come full circle.”)

Chiastic structure has been used for ancient epics (the Iliad and Odyssey, Paradise Lost), religious texts (many narrative books of the Bible, including Ruth, Jonah, Samuel, Genesis, and the Synoptic Gospels use it), and modern classics in both literature and cinema like Harry Potter and Star Wars employ it. In anime/manga, Tokyo Ghoul used it, and Bungou Stray Dogs strongly appears to be using it (but it’s harder to say definitively or to chart it out because we seem to be in upwards end of the middle arc right about now).

So, what’s SnK’s chiastic structure?

A) Fall of Shiganshina: The World is Cruel (and beautiful)

B) Training Corps (yes, it belongs here): Cruelty to Children

A) Trost: Cruel Loss, Beautiful Hope

C) Female Titan: Cruel End to Friendship

ABC) Clash of the Titans: The World is Cruel and Beautiful

C) Uprising Arc: Beautiful Beginning to Friendship

A) Return to Shiganshina: Cruel Loss, Beautiful Hope

B) Marlay: Cruelty to Children

A) Final Arc: The World is Beautiful (and cruel)

Of note, this is not me saying that none of the other arcs parallel each other--they clearly do. This is just a look at the chiastic structure in particular.

A note about the AB pattern. Arcs that have A all have common elements even if they most directly parallel the arc they line up with. The central chiasm contains elements of all three.

Fall of Shiganshina Arc: The World is Cruel (and also beautiful)

I’m not sure I need to say much here lol. The story’s opening chapters are renowned for their horror and display of cruelty. Yet we see beauty too in the Jaeger family having taken in Mikasa, in Eren defending Armin from bullies.

And we see it in how Hannes saves Eren and Mikasa.

And there’s more cruelty in the vow Eren makes, which, of course, he’s now bringing to fruition:

The Training Corps Arc: Cruelty to Children

Yes, this one belongs here. I know that it technically occurs post-Trost in the manga, but it’s the only flashback arc in the entire story, and I think we’d all agree that pacing-wise it’s... not well placed post-Trost. The anime did a good by moving it to immediately follow the intro arc.

Basically, the main theme here is that innocent kids lose innocence. From the humorous to the cruel, we see it. The kids shouldn’t be joining the military; it’s awful that they are.

It introduces Sasha:

And makes sure to show us them just being kids:

Additionally, it shows us the determination Eren has to work hard and be the one to destroy the titans:

Eren’s determination leads to his success in his training, but as we’ll later see, his obsession is destroying him.

Trost Arc: Cruel Loss, Beautiful Hope

Or, the arc that contains one of my favorite moments, but also almost led to me stopping watching SnK when I first got into it.

The arc begins with our first rematch: humanity vs. the titans, round two. (Thus, it parallels the Fall of Shiganshina).

So let’s discuss that favorite moment of mine: when the 104th teams up to defeat the titans. Even Annie, who is later revealed to be an enemy, saves Connie.

Trost, of course, contains the first big “WTF” plot twist of the story: when Eren is “reborn” out of the belly of a titan. When a character is in an enclosed space in literature, especially one with liquid, viscera, and blood, it’s probably a symbolic rebirthing scene. From, at that point, Eren’s lowest moment of defeat, Eren realizes he has the powers to change things.

But Eren is not the only one who comes to an important realization this arc. Like the Fall of Shiganshina, Return to Shiganshina, and the final arc, there is EMA focus. Mikasa makes a decision to live on despite loss:

And Armin receives affirmation of his self-worth and realizes that even if fighting isn’t his skill, strategizing is just as valuable:

This arc also contains Marco’s death, marking the first time the 104th have to cope with the loss of one of their own.

The arc’s final fight is concluded with Levi Heichou shows up to save the day.

And, of course, the concept of blocking the hole in the wall is first brought up (this time with a boulder), and the military needs to make a choice about whether to use Eren or exterminate him; Armin is able to convince them to trust Eren.

The Female Titan Arc: A Cruel End to a Friendship

The arc contains a notable moment of Eren deciding to trust his colleagues--Levi’s squad--only to lose them all.

Additionally, Eren’s relationship with Annie ends poorly (obviously. Should Annie be in the paths right now, as she likely is, I don’t think she’ll respond well to Eren either and is more likely to help take him down). Like Eren taught Mikasa to fight and to live, Annie taught Eren how to fight as her father taught her.

What’s notable about this is that Annie’s relationship with her father is cruel and beautiful--he clearly wanted nothing more than for Annie to survive and he’s still waiting for her. Annie embodies this dichotomy as well: Armin notes that she is exceptionally kind, yet the world doesn’t give her a choice. She is so kind that she spares Armin and goes along with his plan to capture her despite knowing it is a trap, because she does not want to hurt friends, because she wants to be a good person. Annie wears a cold mask, but she is truly kind.

The Female Titan Arc concludes when Eren accepts the monstrous part of himself, using everything he has to fight Annie. It’s not a coincidence that the arc ends with Annie ripping off part of the wall, revealing the titans within. This symbolizes that the structures that ostensibly were erected to protect society are built around the monstrous, and thus sets up the Uprising Arc.

Clash of the Titans Arc: The World is Cruel and Also Beautiful

My favorite arc.

It contains several important elements: it’s where Ymir hints at the true enemy of the story, and it’s where we start to see that the Survey Corps might be capable of cruelty as well.

Erwin sacrifices his arm, foreshadowing his later sacrifice of his life, Ymir and Historia assure each other of their love (almost like love, connection, and humanity are braided themes)...

It’s also where Eren is revealed as the Coordinate, and where the central relationship of the story as @linkspooky writes (and theorizes) about here develops in a moment that is truly beautiful and cruel. Mikasa declares her love for Eren, but Eren pulls away because he needs to fight titans to keep living.

It also foreshadows and acts as an inverse to Eren’s tragic current choice: he chose to fight instead of to accept love, but he had little choice then and was acting heroically. He had choices now.

Additionally of note, since this arc is the central chiasm of the story, it contains elements from both the A and B parallels. Such as, for example, Sasha receiving development and the focus on the suffering of children, from Sasha saving Kaya (beauty) to Nanaba and the others dying to protect the 104th:

Also, the Hannes storyline reaches its conclusion with Hannes’ death, proving for once and for all that Hannes is no coward:

The death of Hannes is symbolic of the EMA trio moving from a child stage to an adolescent stage in their metaphorical development. It parallels Carla’s death, and Levi’s (the final mentor figure for EMA) current near-death experience (I don’t think Levi needs to die nor do I think he will at this point, because he seems to have survived the parallel incident).

The Uprising Arc: A Beautiful Beginning to a Friendship

There are quite a few parallels here with the Female Titan Arc. We have two parallels with Annie’s complex relationship with her father: Historia and Levi (with Kenny for Levi). Like with Annie’s father, Kenny is not a great father figure, but he did want Levi to survive and gives him a life-saving tool right before he dies (the titan serum). Historia has the direct opposite relationship with her father as Annie: Annie’s father loves her but treats her harshly to teach her to protect herself; Historia’s father appears to treat her kindly, claiming he’s always wanted a relationship with her, but he actually does not care about her at all.

Historia and Eren’s relationship also foils Annie and Eren’s: if Annie and Eren’s relationship leads to Eren accepting the monstrous/titan part of himself, Historia and Eren’s relationship leads to Eren accepting the weak, unspecial part of himself.

Additionally, this arc focuses on the new Squad Levi, replacing Petra, Oruo, and the others--and this time, Squad Levi really does come in clutch, saving Eren and Historia. These scenes are deliberately paralleled--as in, there is a literal flashback in the Uprising Arc to Eren having to make a decision re: Squad Levi. When Eren acts on his own instincts this time, he saves them.

Return to Shiganshina: Cruel Loss, Beautiful Hope

Like the Trost Arc, it contains a rematch between humanity and their enemies; this time, however, it is not mindless titans who are the real enemies, but Bertolt and Reiner (and Zeke), demonstrating how personal this fight has been (going from a journey of strange monsters-->friends-->your own internal heart in the current arc). It also, on a more basic level, contains the goal of plugging up a hole in the wall, this time with Eren’s hardened shell.

It also contains the 104th teaming up to take down an enemy. Only, this time, instead of Annie and Mikasa dealing the killing blows to titans about to kill Sasha and Connie, they are teaming up to kill Reiner, a former friend.

Like in Trost, when Eren was “reborn” out of the belly of a titan, Eren experiences a moment of awakening here. He realizes he is not the hero of this story: Armin is.

And likewise, Mikasa makes a decision to accept loss and live on.

And Armin receives affirmation of his self-worth and his strategizing doesn’t just save Eren this time, but potentially humanity:

This arc also contains the flashback to Marco’s death and, of course, Bertolt’s death, which heavily, heavily parallels Marco’s. Like with Marco, Bertolt’s once-friends are watching and weeping, but they choose not to help him for the sake of their mission (again: you become the monster; this is however NOT a commentary on the morality of such decisions, but instead is an observation. Bertolt’s death, even if you choose not to blame the Survey Corps, is horrific and agonizing and cruel).

And of course, guess who saves the day and determines the future of the story? Levi Heichou. However, again, in keeping with the motif of conflicts getting more personal, Levi does not have to kill a monster titan (in fact, he fails to kill Zeke, though he does take him down). Instead, he has to choose to let his best friend die. Like in Trost, where the military needed to make a choice about whether to listen to Eren, Levi chooses to save Armin (though not because of Eren’s please necessarily, but because of his own care for Erwin).

The battle of Shiganshina, like how the Battle of Trost ends with Eren emerging as humanity’s hope, ends with a revelation to change the story forever. Humanity is not extinct.

The Marlay Arc:: Cruelty to Children 2.0

Innocent kids lose innocent in both the past and present in this arc. The arc sets up copious Reiner and Eren parallels, showing how they both worked hard in training to become heroes.

Additionally, we see that being perpetuated to the next generation in Gabi and Falco, Zophia and Udo. They are just children, but they are killed horrifically and fight in wars as part of their training (it’s even worse than the Paradis military):

Like all other B parallel arcs, it also contains focus for Sasha. She chooses not to kill a child, providing a beautiful counter from the cruelty of Eren’s actions. Yet, she pays the price for this beauty, as she is cruelly murdered. Sasha may not be a child herself anymore, but she is still a person, and the focus on food for her in the moment of her death reinforces this.

We also see that our grown-up children are losing innocence as well. Eren becomes the monster he swore to destroy, becoming a titan to murder innocents.

Final Arc: The World is Beautiful (and cruel)

I know the emphasis right now is on cruelty and I don’t mean to minimize it. From Historia to how Eren treats his friends, to what Eren’s currently now doing, it’s painful.

It contains a return to Shiganshina, like the Fall of and Return to Shiganshina arcs. And like the first arc, it irrevocably changes the world. On this day, humanity has received not a grim reminder, not a choice.

Instead of Mikasa and Armin receiving help from an adult to save Eren (Hannes), they are the adults this time. It is up to them to save Eren from himself, which likely is not going to be kind enough to spare Eren’s life this time. That said, I do think/expect a moment of Eren remembering his humanity in the end. And we already know it ends with life and freedom.

#snk meta #chiastic structure #aot meta #shingeki no kyojin meta #attack on titan meta #snk 123 #eren jaeger #mikasa ackerman #armin arlert #ema #levi ackerman #yumihisu #historia reiss #annie leonhart #sasha blouse #reiner braun #marco bodt #bertolt hoover

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