#to anyone who was questioning why grace did what he did at the beginning
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#20.5 Care
"Agni…" Grace shook him awake.
Agni stirred on the bed, a little displeased. Grace was being a little rough today. Ever since they started living together in this new timeline, Agni usually woke up to Grace kissing his cheek, not an urgent grip on his shoulder. It would have raised his awareness, but for some reason, his body was refusing to do so.
"Please, wake up." Grace begged, voice a little wet.
Agni forced himself to open his eyes, squinting at the blinding light that made his head ache. Once his vision adjusted to the room, he saw that Grace was close to tears. He visibly deflated once Agni managed to lock gazes with him and finally let the dam break free. "Oh thank goodness. I've been trying to wake you a few times but you didn't respond so I thought–" Grace wiped his tears off and tried to regain himself.
"Wh-" Agni coughed weakly, his throat was so dry. What happened?
Grace began explaining anyway. "When I woke up I noticed that you had a fever. So I tried to check on you, but you were more sluggish than your normal sick days. So I was afraid that you were–"
Grace stopped mid-ramble as Agni found and squeezed Grace's hand, trying to stop him from panicking. Waiting for Grace to recollect himself, Agni pushed himself up to sit to make himself more awake. The world spun and a wave of nausea hit him full force. Agni pushed himself off the bed and stumbled a little when his knee tingled uncomfortably. Realizing this, Grace swooped him off his feet and carried him down to the bathroom.
Soon Agni found himself sitting down on the floor next to the toilet bowl. Grace draped a blanket over him before Agni realized he was shivering. Agni noticed that his breath was hot and his shirt clung to his skin from cold sweat.
Because their bedroom and the bathroom were quite a hassle to go back and forth from, Grace prepared the water bed in the bathroom for them to use later, and Agni was thankful for his thoughtfulness. Grace then sat next to him and mindlessly rubbed on Agni's hunched back, up and down along his spine comfortingly.
As Agni emptied his stomach in the toilet, he hazily recalled taking a little more sleeping pills than he should have last night, plus drinking a few cups of wine beforehand. Though given the circumstances, he didn't know whether he could've stopped himself from doing so. In that case, he must've had a hangover, on top of the chills that he usually got after using his ice shinsu, which often developed into fever.
The room was quiet after the wave of nausea passed, and the silence was nice against his foggy mind. His breath was still slow and uneven, and his throat felt arid and sore. Grace didn't look like he was faring any better, with his eyes red and swollen, movement sluggish as if he was working on autopilot. Still, Grace tended to him patiently until Agni felt okay enough to lay back down on the bed.
However, Grace didn't join him as Agni thought he would, and instead made his way to the door. "I will get you some medicine."
"Do you know which to get?" Agni rasped out. When Grace didn't answer right away, Agni typed the answer in his pocket. "There, sent." Only then did Agni notice the time, so he added, "You should get breakfast as well, if you have not."
"Maybe. I won't leave for long." And Grace closed the door after saying that.
Agni was just hoping that Grace could have a breather from being cooped up to take care of him, but deep down he was relieved with that promise. After all, the thought of being left alone when his body felt like it was chained to the ground spiked his anxiety. His stomach churned as bad memories replayed in his mind from the reminder. He dragged his heavy feet and kneeled beside the toilet bowl for the second time, already missing the comfort of the bed. He retched to try getting rid of the awful feeling, but it wasn't effective when he had nothing else to empty.
As the sleep medication wore off, his thoughts also returned louder, and Agni was reminded again of why he decided to take another dose last night. It wasn't like him to do something so impulsive, but after Grace fell asleep crying, everything seemed too much to bear alone. He needed something to help him quiet all the guilt that he had piled up.
All the events leading up to that tragedy replayed vividly over and over. Each time he tried to think of ways it could've ended differently, but only a few seemed to have played in their favor. But of course, what good would it do him anyway? Because he couldn't change what had happened, even if he went back to the past. And the fact that they were gone was the reality he had to live with from now on.
Grace returned quicker than he had anticipated, with the food tray and all. But his complexion did look much better than before he left, so Agni felt somewhat relieved.
"Bam is outside," was what Grace said as a greeting. And yeah, it did explain a lot for his better mood.
"You should spend time with him." Because Grace needed someone to cheer him up, and who else knew how to do it better than himself? "Don't worry about me."
"How could I not?" Grace sat next to him, putting the food tray on the floor, completely ignoring Agni's former suggestion. Grace brushed his palm on Agni's forehead, the clear temperature difference made his eyebrows knit together in concern. "Your fever rose."
"It's not usually this stubborn." Agni exhaled some of his frustration, and began coughing as his body reminded him of how dry his throat was. He took a careful sip of the water that Grace offered and waited for it to settle before taking the medicine, swallowing it dry out of habit.
"You should eat something." Grace pulled the tray so it was within Agni's reach. "Or drink some water, you're dehydrated."
Agni groaned, though he knew he needed to get something in his system to make his body focus on recovering. He nibbled on the crackers and drank the water little by little, deciding to take his time rather than risk it. Grace looked very satisfied when Agni managed to get everything down, which in turn also made Agni feel somewhat accomplished.
Not long afterward, Agni yawned, tired after being kept awake by the nausea and his loud thoughts. Grace had pulled Agni to sit on his lap, body facing each other to share as much warmth while keeping Agni upright, or else he might have an upset stomach later.
The way Grace's breath brushed past his neck grounded him, as it was an easy thing to focus on. Time passed slowly, and it would've lulled him to sleep if Grace didn't let the silence linger. There was a tenseness in Grace's shoulders, and the way Grace hugged him a little tighter than usual was enough to tell him not to leave his wave controller alone drowning in his thoughts. The moment Grace's breathing started to get uneven, Agni knew that Grace was crying. Absentmindedly, he began rubbing and patting Grace's back, earning him some sniffles. It was pathetic that this was the only thing Agni could offer to support Grace, but he couldn't think of anything better that he was able to give as of the moment.
Agni didn't cry, though he wished he could, so his chest could relieve some of the pressure and stop aching. To think that they were willing to save him without thinking of the consequences, was something Agni still had a hard time believing. That he was able to hold Grace like this was all thanks to them. He could've died that day if Rak didn't protect him, or he could've lost his mind by living in that damned place if Isu and Hatz didn't come for him. He missed his old team, both dead and alive, and all that he left behind in that war time. He never admitted it out loud, but god he missed them.
Eventually, Grace pulled away. His eyes were red and puffy, but his movements were no longer on autopilot. He tucked Agni back to bed after checking his temperature, saying that it had gone lower, and evidently it ceased some of his worry.
Agni snuggled closer to Grace, finding comfort at the thought of him. Alive, real and close by. "Thank you, for being here."
The corner of Grace's lips pulled upwards in a gentle smile, "You too." His free hand ran through Agni's hair and massaged his scalp. "Get better soon."
Agni started to drift off to sleep then, comfortably tucked up under a blanket and safe in Grace's embrace. He remembered the way Grace placed a lingering kiss on his forehead before Agni was out completely.
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#I admit this is the most self-indulgent chapter so far ahaha#oh to be so devoted to each other 🥺😭💖🙏#to anyone who was questioning why grace did what he did at the beginning#its bc just last night agni told him about the death of his friends. and he was grieving and reminded by fear of being left alone#I headcanon him to be able to read someone's shinsu. so he's able to tell if something is wrong especially with how he often checked on agn#so when he woke up and found that agni is sick sick he immediately panicked because it reminded him on every instances that agni almost die#also grace knew how much agni hates being left alone when he is sick. so even if agni pushed him away out of goodwill or embarrassment#he will still be nearby if he could help it. not wanting to take any chances#tower of god#tog#two sides of the same coin fic#my fic#my art#bam#baam#25th baam#25th bam#the 25th baam#the 25th bam#jue viole grace#khun#koon#khun a.a#khun aguero agnis#khunbam#koonbaam#bamxkhun
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sapphire-hearted (part one)
Aemond Targaryen x f!reader
The start to an angst-ridden little story, wherein the reader, Aemond's dearest friend (and clandestine love) learns of his apparent new paramour, Alys.
themes/warnings: angst, jealousy, fwb type situation, Aemond is kind of a clueless twat
part two ▪︎ part three ▪︎ masterlist
edit(!): this oneshot seems to have taken a life of its own, like most of my fics, quite unexpectedly! I've changed the title from (sapphire) blue heart to sapphire-hearted, and part two will be out in a few hours! is out now!
"Why do you not look at me?" He gently pries your face towards him with his free hand, as you both lie naked on his sheets, his arm wrapped around you. "Have I done something wrong?" he asks.
"Nothing, Aem." You shake your head, letting his hand fall.
He takes one deep breath. He knows you like the back of his hand; he knows something isn't right.
"You're not fooling me, gevie." Beautiful, he calls you, as you sit up and bring your knees to your chest. You feel the cold air on your back, and then, his fingers tracing patterns on your bare skin.
Gevie. You wonder if he calls Alys the same. After their rumoured trysts. After she is seen leaving his bedchambers. Has she lain among these very sheets herself, where you are now?
You and Aemond were not together, no. You were not betrothed. Your House was too lowly to allow you to wed a Targaryen prince. But he had said he was yours. Just yours.
How has that changed so quickly?
"Speak to me," he pleads. He sits up behind you, kissing the back of your neck. "You know I have my methods of making you do so. Shall I employ them?" You can hear the amusement in his voice, the assuredness.
You thought you loved it more than anything, but now it feels like some cruel jest.
You turn to face him directly. "Is she better than me?"
He leans back, fully aware of who you mean. "Hmm," he purses his lips. "Jealousy does not become you, it seems."
"I'm glad you think me amusing." You bite back, looking away.
"This is amusing. How can you be jealous of her?"
You aren't sure what to make of that question. Is he mocking you, and the justification of your envy? Who are you to him anyway? Just a friend, no?
"Aemond. I thought... that we..."
"You know what we are. How we are. Isn't it enough?"
"Not if I have to share you with some witch!" you rise from his bed, and wrap your cloak around yourself. "I've turned down the finest suitors, simply because you wished me to. Simply because you were jealous. Don't you think you owe me the same courtesy?"
His voice is colder when he responds, "What do you think I am doing with Alys, hmm? Do you think I enjoy having her grace my bedchambers, and have her clawing at me?" He stands too, towering over your stature. "I have never wanted to bed anyone other than you. What I am doing with her... what I have to do with her... It is for the good of the Seven Kingdoms."
"Spare me, Aemond." You swat his hands away, when he reaches for your arms. "Don't..." He tries again, much quicker this time, and he holds your forearms tightly against his bare chest.
"She has magic." There is a wild look in his eye when he says this, and it makes you uneasy. "She sees things, Alys. She can predict what the enemy's next move is, where they'll be. What I am doing with her, lying with her, is but a small price to pay."
"What if you don't lie with her? You don't have to..."
"She asks me to."
"You don't have to. You're the prince! She answers to you, not the other way around."
"I refused, of course, in the beginning." He holds your face gently in his hands now, trying to make you understand. "That did no good. She gave me nothing. I could have her tortured. But this will only serve to distance her even more from our cause."
"So, to get what you want... to hear her incredible visions and benefit from her magical spells, you have to fuck her? Very astute of you, Aemond."
"Careful, my love." He tilts his head, trying to work through your anger.
You use your palms on his chest to push him away. He only stumbles a little, the faint sound of his low growl reaching your ears.
"You know what I'll do?" you threaten, your cloak falling back to the floor as you wave your arms dramatically. "The next dashing Lord that asks for my hand, I'll take. It could be Lord Manderly's son or... Lord Beesbury's eldest boy has made an offer, too. I'll wed him, whoever he is, why not? Even if I don't love him, it will only be a small price to pay," you sneer, mirroring his words from before. "It is what's expected of me, after all. It is for the good of my House."
Aemond's jaw clenches in his rage. "Then I shall have him captured and quartered to pieces in the dungeons before he can even get the chance to - "
"No," you shake your head at his nonsense. "No, you would not. You would not do something like that to me. How would that be fair? You and I, we'll never marry. As it stands, you'd sooner wed your witch than I."
"I would marry you in a heartbeat." He moves closer now, desperation creeping in his voice. His lips meet yours in a haste. Wet and demanding. When you turn your head, he only continues kissing the side of your face. Then he stops, pressing his forehead to your temple. "You know this, my love. You have to know this. Alys is nothing compared to you. Without her, I might lose the war. But without you... I lose myself."
You nearly cave in at that, as you always do when it comes to Aemond. But now, you remind yourself to stand your ground.
"Then prove it to me," you whisper, and a stray tear falls down your cheek. "Do as I ask. Stop being with her."
Seconds pass. Aemond's mind races at the possible outcomes. His heart aches at the sight of your sadness, but he feels compelled to think of other things too.
The war. Defeating the Blacks. Easily gaining the upper hand through dark magic.
At the end of it all - and if he does what he does, it should all end very soon - he will still have you. He's sure of it.
You will always come back to him. You will understand.
"I cannot," he says, his words striking through your heart.
You feel numb all over, but you force yourself to step away from him, and hurriedly put your dress back on.
"My love, please..." He watches helplessly as you tie the strings of your skirts, preparing to leave.
"My prince," you cursty, when you've managed to put yourself together. "I am not certain when, but you're invited to honour us with your presence at my coming marriage ceremony."
"I'd sooner command Vhagar to burn Westeros to ashes."
"You mean, you'd sooner bask in the pleasures that only your witch can offer?" you laugh mirthlessly. "Of course."
You start walking away, determinedly. Ice has flooded your veins and your heart, turning you cold and blue. But you press on. The pain will have to wait for later.
"You'll come back to me," he calls after you.
"Oh, I wouldn't hold my breath, if I were you."
You slam the door behind you.
Angst!!! We all need this sometimes. I swear it riles me up so good, I almost wonder if something's messed up with my romantic ideals ....
.... who are we kidding? Of course there is. Because I would marry our one-eyed Vhagar-riding war terrorist in a heartbeat.
taglist open for an upcoming part!
#aemond targaryen#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond targaryen imagine#aemond targaryen one shot#house of the dragon
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Burial Plot [J.T.]
Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader
Summary: Jason thinks back on memories of your relationship
Warnings: Swearing, fluff, angst, mentions of injuries, self-deprecating thoughts (jason), mentions of previous homelessness, mention of addiction (not jason or the reader), mentions of blood, character death, open ending
Words: 8,451
A/n: Dayseeker dropped Replica and Burial Plot really did something for me (again). If you wanna be tagged in my fics, you can click the link below, send me an ask/comment, or follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary and turn on notifications if you prefer that!!
masterlist | request info | tag list
The cold Gotham breeze nips at Jason’s cheeks as his hands grip the ledge of the roof so hard the solid concrete almost wants to collapse at his feet. The streets are busy below him, the streetlights and buildings illuminating the otherwise dark and gloomy city. Something here manifests and metastasizes into something cruel and unusual, a type of suffering that almost brings the city pure and unfiltered joy. It’s something about this city that feels unbearably cruel sometimes.
Gotham always felt like it was filled of poison with no antidote so maybe that’s why Jason always managed to find himself back in the dreary city.
It’s how he always saw himself, drenched in poison, ruining everything around him even when he desperately tries not to. It’s as if he was cursed from the very beginning and the more he tries the more he messes up. Even coming back from the dead didn’t seem right since even Bruce wanted nothing to do with him. It took him so long to even get into the family’s good graces again because even when he would try his hardest, it always blew up in his face. So, to Jason, there had to be something wrong with him.
But, then, there was you.
Jason remembers the first time you had a proper conversation. You'd met a handful of times prior but never really talked past the usual pleasantries. Dick had asked for your help on a mission even when Jason insisted they had enough help with the other bats and a few of their tag-a-longs. But, Dick insisted.
----
“Red Hood.” You’d snickered through your mask as you watched Jason on his stomach watching the building in front of you through binoculars.
“Something funny?” Jason quipped back with a gentle force of annoyance.
He could do this himself. He did not need to be teamed up with anyone and he had no clue why of all people, he was teamed up with you. You didn't even know each other. At least Jason knew the other bats and their ability and capabilities. You were an unknown factor in this even if he trusted Dick's opinion on you. He knew he could do this himself...in peace and quiet.
“Irony.” You’d stated back. “Red Hood. Joker. Boom.” You shrugged dramatically, earning a glance from Jason. You couldn’t see it through the helmet, but if looks could kill, you’d have been dead on the spot. “It’s not a very threatening name.” Your voice was nonchalant it made Jason want to groan for ten minutes.
“Excuse me?” Jason shook his head.
“I mean…Red Hood." You stated again, just as casually as before. "Not very threatening for a guy who decapitates people and blows people up.”
Jason moved the binoculars from the helmet and looked back at you. “Okay, so what would you have suggested then, huh?” Jason questioned and he’d have been lying if he said he wasn’t somehow both annoyed to hell and back and also, a bit intrigued about where you’d go with this as you knew anything at all about him.
“I think it would have been hilarious if you kept the Robin mantle actually.” Your voice had been airy and filled with amusement as a smile reached your eyes.
Jason had to bite back his own snicker. “Don’t think anyone would else would have.”
“Well, that’s cause they have shit senses of humor. I mean if I hear Dick say one more pun tonight, I think I’ll have an aneurism.”
“Yeah.” Jason lets out a chuckle this time and you felt as though you had won something from it. “His jokes are the fucking worst.” Jason almost groans through the helmet. “But yours aren’t much better, princess.” Jason stated before picking up the binoculars again to go back to watching the building.
A genuine smile came over your features. “I know.”
Jason's eyes had softened when he’d glanced back over at you. Something about how you held yourself during the stakeout, the ease of the conversation and you bringing up his death. He knew your fighting style, knew about your powers. He knew what you could do and how well off you were and how you were able to perfectly handle yourself. But, the ease of you held yourself on that rooftop was as if everything else were going to be easy for you even if it wasn’t. It was interesting and a bit fun.
“How’d Dick rope you into this anyway?” Jason had asked as he kept his eyes on the building.
“I had nothing else to do.” You laughed softly.
It was true. You didn't and Dick asked. His jokes might be bad but he was always one of your best friends so you'd always help when he asked. But, it wasn't all that big of an ask when Dick mentioned Jason would be helping, too. Maybe you had asked to be teamed with him instead of Steph or Tim this time.
“How about you? Dick said you don’t do the team thing very often.” You asked.
“Had nothing else going on.” Jason had chuckled softly. “If Dick was asking me and everyone else, I felt like I had to help." Jason stated even if he didn't really mind helping out his siblings.
“That’s nice of you.” You’d said.
“It’s nothing.” Jason keeps his eyes on the building you were supposed to be watching.
It’d be a lie if you said you weren’t the least bit intrigued by your friend’s brother. Dick talked about him often enough. You knew stories about The Red Hood. Jason Todd had almost seemed interesting from your perspective. The misfit son who gets brutally murdered and comes back to be, somehow, more of the misfit troublemaker that pisses everyone off. Hero turned anti-hero (you’d refused to call him a villain). It was tragic but he still comes back and instead of deciding to make innocent people suffer like most other people would do if they were him, he decided to just do something about it. Maybe his methods are a bit extreme and maybe he’s a bit of an asshole, but he’s doing something for the greater good. That’s not all bad and you’d always thought that was still better than him doing worse or doing nothing. You’d always thought that made him more interesting, more admirable.
And, maybe it doesn’t hurt that he’s kind of pretty with the blue eyes and white streak of contrast amongst the rest of his black hair.
“So…” You cleared your throat.
Jason looked back at you and then back to the building. “What?”
“Are you always so broody?” You asked bluntly as you moved your eyes back to him.
“I’m not broody.” Jason snapped. He was not broody, he was just busy.
“Kind of are.” You’d smiled with confidence.
“We’re supposed—“
“Blah blah blah." You waved him off because you knew exactly what he was going to say. "I know. We are. We can do the stakeout and get to know each other.”
You were not bad company. But, you were blunt and talkative. Jason didn't really know what to make of it, really. This small conversation had shown him that you would ask and say whatever crossed your mind and he has learned that is not always a good thing. Though, your bluntness and how casual you were about the whole thing was a bit intriguing. This was a job, however, and Jason did not come to make friends with Dick's friend.
“Who the hell said I wanted to get to know you?” Jason had snarked back.
“Ouch.” You huffed as you started feeling a little disheartened. “That was mean.” Your nose had scrunched under your mask.
“Look, princess, we’re on a job. That’s all it is. Don’t take it personally.” Jason shook his head and he didn't intend to hurt your feelings but this was supposed to just be a job.
“You can't me princess and one minute it sounds fine but condescending the next. That’s weird. And the job doesn't have to be boring. Doesn’t silence ever bother you?” You’d asked and it was that question that always irked him.
It’s silent a lot for him. He’s used to it but silence is still deafening. Since getting into the good graces with the family finally, it hadn't been as bad. There was usually someone calling him or something he needed to tell one of them. But, silence can eat at him still. It bothered him, just not on a mission or a job. Silence there was always fine though he didn't think that was entirely the point of your question.
“I’m sorry.” Jason muttered. “I’m not trying to be an asshole. Just wanna get this shit done.” He hadn’t looked back at you once.
You were still intrigued by him. You still wanted to get to know him even if he didn't want to get to know you yet. It wasn't some secret Jason was guarded. That was fine. It didn't really bother you. So, maybe it was dumb then but you decided to just go for it.
“Wanna grab something to eat after then?” You asked bluntly, getting Jason’s attention.
“What?” Jason asked quickly as he turned his head to look at you again.
“Like food?” You quipped. “You and me. Food, get to know each other.” Your voice had sounded a little more nervous this time.
"You actually want to get to know me?" Jason questioned. "Thought you were making conversation."
"Well..." You shrugged softly. "Yeah, conversation but I also want to get to know you. You seem fun." You'd managed to pull off a cheeky smile with your last sentence.
Jason had actually laughed. “I seem fun?”
“Are you an owl?” You quipped back as you matched his laughter. “Yeah, Red Hood seems like he’d be fun." You urged. "Get food with me.” You shrugged softly as hope echoed into your eyes.
Jason almost said no. Lately, he regrets not saying no. He should have. He swears left and right, up and down, every piece of him should have just said no. But, he thought you were pretty and funny and interesting. It’d been a while since Jason just got to know someone. He thought it would have been nice and you had so much hope in your eyes, he wasn't sure he could have mustered up a no if he really tried. There was something about you that made him interested enough to just get food. That would be all it would be. Just food. A no was never going to be an answer.
“Fine but I pick the place.” Jason stated before he looked back at the building.
You’d beamed from under the mask, a rush of heat coming to your cheeks. “Okay, Red.” You nearly laughed. “I trust you.”
----
Jason's legs are trembling and it's getting harder to breathe. It is as if his own memories are strangling him from the inside out, a desperate attempt to suck the life out of him one last time. He used to look at that night with a sense of fondness, almost nostalgia because of how far the two of you had come in three years. But, now it's just tainted memories haunted by the vision of you and the false concept of Jason Todd being allowed to be happy.
He remembers so vividly you telling him you trusted him as if it were somehow something so easy for you. You trusted him and you barely knew him. Jason knew then Dick likely told you some stuff about him, Steph, too probably. Maybe the other bats if you ever asked but under no circumstances should you have just so blindly trusted him after meeting him a handful of times, this having been one of the only actual conversations you had. But you did and something about it made Jason both want to jump off the roof and fall right onto the concrete below him and make his heart melt from his chest.
He thinks about it for just that single second, it was nice. It was a silly thought, he swears it was. No one should trust him because people trust him and then they get hurt, right? That’s how the story goes. In one way or another, they get hurt. Maybe it’s Jason doing the hurting in his typical self-destruction way or it’s worse. But, they get hurt. You trusted him and he thinks that’s the exact moment he should have evacuated. That night changed everything because he didn’t. He didn’t evacuate like he had all but been trained to do. He went to get food with you.
----
“So, tell me about you, Jason Todd.” You had grinned wickedly at him as you pointed a limp french fry at him from across the booth.
Jason shook his head as he leaned back. “Like what?”
“Dunno.” You shrugged and the grin never left your face. “What do you like to do for fun?” You asked so sincerely Jason had burst into a fit of laughter.
It echoes through the small diner. Booms off the booth and the glasses. You’d thought it was the most beautiful sound you’d ever heard. His nose had scrunched and his head tilted back. The laugh was hearty and somehow soft. It fit him so well and he seemed so genuinely happy.
“What I do for fun? That’s what you want to know?” Jason quipped back as he caught his breath.
“I’m sorry that question wasn’t up to your standards?” You had laughed back and Jason felt his heart skip a single beat.
“No, not that. Of all things you could ask though, that’s what you want to know?” Jason asked.
“Well, yeah.” You’d answered easily. “I know what you do for a living. So, what do you like to do when you’re not doing that?”
There was something so honest and sincere about how you’d asked, Jason almost felt comfortable laying it out. His interests are his and in a way, he always likes keeping them a little close to his chest. Some things he doesn’t tell everyone but others…it’s okay that they know but they’re his. But you were eating your fries, just waiting, filled with hope.
“I like to read.” Jason stated simply as he plucked one of his fries from his plate.
“Oh! Like what?” You asked with eyes wide as you put an elbow on the table to lean in. Dick said Jason was guarded so you didn’t think you’d get too much out of him tonight but you were so relieved you got something from him.
Maybe you’d had a crush on him from a distance for a while.
“Uh..” Jason offered an awkward chuckle. “Like Jane Austen.” Jason shrugged. “Mary Shelley.”
You shook your head in surprise. “Not what I expected.”
“Yeah, yeah--” Jason had started to wave you off.
“No, I mean, I dunno. Thought it’d be like…Godfather-type books. Or something.” You were the one who offered an awkward chuckle that time. “I love Frankenstein.” You'd said it softly with a tender smile and Jason felt relieved.
Jason had asked you what it was about Frankenstein you liked so much and you just went on a whole ramble about it. Jason hung onto every word as if your voice was the sound of his favorite song played on repeat. He just...listened and something about the way he smiled made your heart jump and spin. You may not have had the excessive amount of trauma Jason did but...there was always something that felt comforting when someone let you ramble and he did. Not once did he seem bored or disinterested and then you got to watch his face light up when you asked him why he liked Jane Austen and what his favorites were.
It was Jason's turn to ramble and it wasn't much at first but the more he got going, it was like the more excited about it he got. His face lit up like a Christmas tree and he got a little more dramatic and he relaxed a little in his seat. Jason didn't get a lot of chances to really ramble about his interests, not like this. But, you gave him that in the little diner booth and it felt comforting. It felt nice. It was fun and he'd have been lying if he said he didn't really enjoy it. And the more you asked about his interests and participated in conversation, the more comfortable he felt.
He was still guarded but you shared some interests so it felt easier to let the conversation go where it wanted, bouncing back and forth between some of both of your favorites and hobbies. It felt good to let go for a few hours. You wanted to get to know him and as it would have turned out, he was really enjoying getting to know you, too.
“What else do you do for fun?” Jason asked as he rested his elbow on the table, now a few hours into this getting to know each other thing.
“Ask broody men out to get food.” You’d laughed that was more of a snicker as if you were proud of yourself for the comment and it got Jason to chuckle right back.
“Oh, so I’m just a meal ticket tonight?!” Jason had asked with sarcasm.
“And a conversation!” You had defended, the both of you laughing.
“I am so hurt.” Jason had said it dramatically, easily.
“Oh, I am so sorry.” Your eyes had widened with sarcasm. “How will you ever recover?” You faked a whine, a hand over your heart and then Jason gained this smirk.
Jason knew it was getting to be early in the morning and you'd have to end this whole thing soon but that did not mean he didn't want to continue getting to know you. You were right. This was fun and maybe he liked your company after all. He liked how easy you made this whole thing seem. No part of him really wanted this to end so he decided to go for it, just as you did.
“What are you doing Thursday?” Jason asked bluntly.
It caught you off guard and it took everything in you not to burst at the seams. You hoped Jason didn’t notice.
He did.
“Uh…” You stuttered with a gushy smile. “Nothing, I don’t think.” You bit the inside of your cheek to try to calm down the smile while you failed miserably. “What’d you have in mind?”
----
Tears are hot on Jason’s cheeks as he remembers that night as if it had just happened. His teeth are clenched so hard they might just shatter right through his gums. His breathing is quick and everything starts to ache.
You had been so happy that he asked you to do something with him, he never thought twice about taking it back. The thought could have crept up on him and he would have shoved it into the darkest corner of his mind because the idea of disappointing you nearly shattered him. He didn’t even know you but there was hope and kindness and sarcasm and you were funny. You didn’t care. You told him Red Hood was not scary. You looked at him with kindness and hope, two things most people do not look at him with and he felt important for those four hours in that booth with you. So, he decided to take that risk.
Risks are a part of his daily life. They are usually calculated and you had told him they were not always calculated in a way that was really all too beneficial to him. The odds were never on his side very often. But that’s just part of the job, something you did understand. Jason was used to risk. His whole life had been one risk after the other just to survive. He was good at taking risks and showing them he didn’t care. This was a risk he wishes he never took though. Showing you these parts of himself and finally letting his guard down. He regrets that risk because he had just done what he always does and wouldn’t have caved about it, none of this would have happened because you would have given up. He bites his tongue as he remembers the exact moment he wanted to flee and decided not to.
----
You were on a rooftop in Crime Alley, not too high up and below you, Jason was kneeling in front of a few kids. You were not spying on him. You were supposed to meet up together while you were in Gotham, this was the spot but apparently, the kids had other ideas. He was just kneeling down to their level, no helmet and a smile beaming back at them. The two kids who couldn’t have been older than seven, looked at him like he was their hero. Jason was not the scary Red Hood who blows people up with c4 or the guy who will decapitate people to get what he wants from other people or the guy who might as well be a sharpshooter and is not afraid to display it. They do not look at him like a weapon. They look at him like he will protect them and he is so kind.
You’d been on a few dates over the last few months, nothing too serious even if neither of you were looking or talking to anyone else. It was nothing too serious even if you both talked nearly nonstop and maybe you couldn’t stop thinking about each other. But, it’d only been a few dates and you didn’t know each other too well yet and that was okay. But, something you had learned was that Jason is very kind. He is a huge asshole but he is so kind. Innocent people, kids, he is nice to them, far nicer than most people are. Jason Todd can and will kill people but he is not as ruthless and calloused as other people think he is and maybe have convinced him he is. So you had sat on that rooftop and watched him with those kids.
He laughed at what you would only assume were bad jokes and Jason never let the smile fall from his lips. It was just the two kids at first then there were five and then ten. He somehow had gathered a group of kids who were just interested in meeting the Red Hood. One of them had a scraped knee so you watched as Jason pulled out a bandaid from his tactical belt. You couldn’t make it out but you did see it was purple and black. He spent an hour just entertaining these kids before they finally decided to disburse.
“Kids, huh?” You had asked once your feet were on solid ground.
Jason quickly turned around, a quirked brow raised as he looked to the roof. “How long were you watching me?”
“Well, I’m never late so…” Your mask covered your smile but he could tell by the way you looked down and the crinkles by your eyes you were smiling. “You’re different with them.” You stated, blunt as always.
“Well, they’re kids so….” Jason said, unsure what your point would have been.
You nodded. “Yeah, I mean…kids…the, uh, the homeless, sex workers, addicts. You're different. You’re different with people here.” You pointed it out because you'd noticed before.
This was your third time in Crime Alley with Jason and he was always different here. It was always rooted in an understanding and a genuine kindness and empathy for things people have dealt with. He never treated someone differently because of their circumstances and instead, he fought for them. You'd seen your fair share of people being cruel to kids and the homeless, sex workers, addicts, the poor. Jason just isn't. Jason gave you a little more faith in humanity.
Meanwhile, Jason could never wrap his head around your bluntness. You never cared how something sounded or how it came off. You just said what you were thinking. That scared him. And made him feel at ease. He knew he would never have to question your intentions but he also had absolutely no idea what you were thinking.
“Grew up here.” Jason pulled in a breath as he rested the helmet on his hip. “I know what it's like.” Jason admitted and it was a small sliver of information he gave up willingly.
You had nodded softly. “Yeah, uh…Dick said you grew up here. Shit was hard for you until Bruce caught you.”
Jason had let out this sort of scoff that was almost a chuckle as he looked up to the sky and then the right. You couldn't tell if it was something bitter in him that was turning or something pleasant. You'd have put your bet on something bitter if he'd asked.
“Yeah, something like that.” Jason looked back to you, shifting his weight.
Dick had warned you to be careful. It was not to be mean towards Jason by any means. It was more because Dick knew Jason tended to push and self-sabotage things. He wanted you not to pry too much too quick. You knew you’d likely have to ask him direct questions if there were things you wanted to know but you knew not to pry too much. You didn’t want to scare him off but it’s been a few months and a few dates and you were curious about it. You wanted to know what made Jason Todd, Jason Todd.
“Do you want to tell me about it?” You asked and you were cautious, something you never really were when asking him things.
Jason had hesitated for a second. It was not a secret. He just prefers to not talk about himself and there was a little bit of something bitter thinking about all of it. Thinking about his life in Crime Alley brings back to him meeting Bruce and then dying. It brings him back to coming back and the way Bruce looked at him like he were a monster before throwing a baterang at his neck. It was the way Jason couldn’t figure out why they couldn’t just forgive each other. It brings back bitterness and pain he can’t quite explain. But, it wasn’t all bad and if he were being really honest, he kind of really liked you. Maybe he could tell you some things about it. You'd yet to give him any reason to not tell you so he decided to take that risk and let you into a small part of his world.
“What’d ya wanna know?” Jason asked before he put the helmet back on.
“Uh…” You weren’t sure if he’d be okay to talk about it so you were unprepared. “Whatever you wanna tell me.” You stated simply as you closed the distance between you.
“Well,” Jason cleared his throat. “It wasn’t all bad.” Jason managed a chuckle before he started telling you things about growing up here and things about his parents, helping you better understand him as a person while also allowing Jason’s trust in you to grow.
----
He stands on this rooftop, desperately begging to go back in time and take the risk back. He wants to fall back to three years ago and rip that night from the both of you. You will be disappointed but that is significantly better than this. Jason swears it is better than this. He can not have you. That is fine. You will do better, you will find better, you always deserved better. He wants to go back and take everything back.
His hands are gripping the cement as if that’ll send him into the past and it only makes his chest feel like it might split open and spill his heart out. He'd dig his own hand into his ribcage and rip his heart from his chest if it would fix any of this. Jason's hands shake with his grip and he would do anything, sacrifice anything he could just to go back. He wants to take it all back even if it’ll hurt you because he remembers that time you told him you had a crush on him.
----
“How long?!” Jason had scrunched his face, confused and insane amused.
“Like a year.” It was more of an awkward giggle that you let out. “I don’t know!” You threw your arm out dramatically, almost regretting telling him. You knew he would be teasing you forever over it now.
“You’ve liked me for a year?” Jason chuckled. “Fucking why? You didn’t even know me!” Jason repositioned on the couch, resting his arm on the back of the couch as he faced you.
“That was part of the fun!” Your eyes had widened as you defended yourself. “I don’t know. Something about the white streak of hair and broad shoulders and…” You pulled in a breath as you shook your head at him, more to try and tease him. “I don’t know. I thought you seemed interesting.”
Dick introduced you at one of the Wayne party things they had at the manor. You were so nervous you could have died right then and there. It really was something about the white streak of hair and the broad shoulders, the thick thighs, and the way his eyes were so damn pretty you could have combusted. His canines were a bit sharp so it looked like he had tiny fangs when the sun hit them just right. Jason didn’t say too much but you thought he was pretty. And you caught glimpses of him throughout the day, laughing with his siblings and rolling his eyes at Bruce and helping Alfred with some of the food. He was big and tall and a little intimidating but not when he was just existing with his family and you found that interesting. The crush went from there.
“Was this before or after Dick told you about me?" Jason had raised a brow, still trying to fathom why you were so interested in him without having had a single conversation.
"After." You answered simply. "He told me all of your stories pretty early on into the friendship. Got to hear all about the kids of Bruce Wayne and company." You stated with a soft smile.
"Why then?" It was a genuine question he had. "And why didn't you say anything for a year?" Jason probably wouldn't have said anything at all if it were him but he's surprised you waited so long since you never seemed to hide any of your emotions.
"I wasn't sure how you'd feel about it." You laughed softly, looking down for a second before looking back to him. "I didn't see you often, thought maybe it'd fade but it did not." You scrunched your nose as your smile grew. "But, uh, I don't know. Dick told me you died and how and…that you guys didn’t get along to put it lightly…since you came back. At first. You were all good then now but it took awhile. But then I meet you and…” You shook your head. “You didn’t seem…mean or…threatening. I don’t know.” You could feel the heat start to burn your cheeks.
You had only heard the story from Dick's point of view at that time. You've since gotten Jason's side but only hearing Dick's was different. There was anger and a sense of betrayal even if it wasn't rightfully placed. It was as if Jason being brought back brought back all of their guilt and grief, too but they never had any way to deal with it. They didn't know where to put it so they put it on the person that caused it, in a roundabout way. It wasn't right and it wasn't right what Jason was doing either. It was just a mess of miscommunication and the inability to move on. Dick spoke fondly of Jason by the time you met, but he told you about all of it so despite his kind words about Jason, you thought maybe he'd be a bit mean and cold and broody and intimidating. But he was not. He was warm and kind and he looked happy. You found it interesting that after everything, Jason was not a cold and cruel person.
“Hey, you can’t go around saying I’m not threatening.” Jason had given you this teasing grin. “You’ll ruin my rep.”
You let out a snort. “Didn’t you just save like a litter of kittens from a car, gave the driver the dirtiest look I had ever seen, and then wouldn’t leave the shelter until they told you they would be fine? Did you not just do that two days ago? Did you not call today to check on them?”
“I’m sorry, should I have let that dickhead hit the kittens?!” Jason asked in horror.
“No!” You let out this laugh that Jason nearly melted into. “I’m just saying, it is not me saying you aren’t threatening. It is going to be those kittens. They’re gonna tell all the other kittens and they’re gonna show up here and then you’re gonna have beef with Selina. I don’t think that’s something you want.” You shrugged casually, trying to withhold your own laugh.
Jason’s booming laugh consumed his entire apartment. “I did not realize saving those kittens would have such a butterfly effect on my relationship with Selina.”
“Shut up!” You groaned as you tossed your head back.
“Okay can we go back to you having a massive crush on me for a year?” Jason eyed you with big doe eyes, mocking you.
“I hate you.” You deadpanned.
“No, you don’t.” Jason pulled in a breath as he gained a giant smile. “Because of your crush on me.” He batted his eyes at you and you wanted to kiss the growing smirk right off of his lips.
“Yeah, I hate you actually. You suck.” You crossed your arms and gave him a fake pout. “My feelings are hurt and everything!”
Jason chuckled before he grabbed your hand from your arm. “I hurt your feelings?” Jason questioned with disbelief, knowing damn well he did not.
“Yes, you did.” You struggled desperately not to break into a fit of laughter as Jason pulled you into his lap.
“You look really hurt.” Jason nodded his head sarcastically, his eyes looking up at you and you thought you'd melt into him.
“I am!” You said it dramatically as a laugh slipped from your lips.
“Right.” Jason nodded his head, his hands coming to your hips. “I am so sorry, could you ever think to forgive me?” Jason questioned with so much sarcasm, you thought he’d start to lose his composure.
“I don’t know.” You answered with a dramatic pout.
Jason let out a laugh. “Your big ole crush on me won’t let you stay mad at me.” Jason leaned toward you, his eyes dodging to your lips.
“You are insufferable.” You stated quietly.
“Sure.” Jason muttered before his hand came to your cheek and pulled you in for a kiss. “So insufferable.” Jason muttered against your lips.
“Just shut up and kiss me.” You rolled your eyes and Jason did not waste a single second more to complete the request.
----
Jason remembers how happy it all was. You were like this beam of light in his life and for once, it didn’t seem so damn grim. Half the time, he didn’t care if he came home or not. But then you started dating and he fell so hard for you that he didn’t think he’d ever stop falling. And suddenly, there was this big reason to come home every night. The loss of him for you would hurt, even if it were momentary. And…he liked being able to come home to you on weekends when you'd stay in Gotham. He liked having someone to come home to. He liked being happy and having a reason to be happy.
Half that time he didn’t care if he came home or not and that caused its fair share of fights. Jason's breath shakes in the cold breeze as his chin quivers, remembering the fights you'd have about it. There were never many because you just didn't fight. Jason would sometimes push and pull, try to sabotage things and you always just called him on his shit, rarely ever even raising your voice at him. But, these fights happened because you cared about him and Jason didn't know what he was supposed to do with that. He was never entirely sure if he could carry it even though you became one of the most important people in his life. He thought you'd leave, maybe, until the last time you fought about it. As tears spill from his eyes, he remembers the last fight you ever had about him being careful.
----
“Why the fuck are you mad now?” Jason groaned from the bathroom as he cleaned up the first aid supplies.
“I don’t fucking know, Jay. Why the fuck would I be mad?!” You yelled back, storming through his apartment. Everything felt too tight, too hard, too much.
“If I knew, I wouldn’t have fucking asked!” Jason yelled back as he followed you into the living room.
You didn’t normally fight and if you did, it was small stuff. Not this. This felt big. It had scared him because as much as he loved to push, he didn't want to lose you. It was never about him, it was always about you deserving better than him or deserving more. But, he almost felt paralyzed at the thought this fight wasn't going to be like the others. He thought you'd finally had it.
“Maybe that’s the problem.” It was more a mutter but Jason was close enough to you not that he heard it.
“What’s that’s supposed to mean?” Jason questioned and he could feel his heart breaking into pieces through his throat.
“Maybe you should fucking know why I’m pissed. But you don’t. Did you ever consider that is the problem, Jay?”
It was not that you were even mad. It was that you were worried about him. You'd just cleaned up a few really nasty cuts again and that was fine. You didn't mind. He always did it for you, too. It was part of the job. It was how frequent it happen and how nonchalant he always was about the whole damn thing. It terrified you and you'd told him over and over. He was normally a good listener but...not when it came to this. And it hurt.
“You were fine earlier! Now you’re not?!” Jason looked to the ceiling in frustration. “I am not a damn mind reader!”
You nearly pulled your hair out. “I am not asking to be a mind reader!” You screamed back at him as tears burned your eyes. “I am asking you to fucking listen to me!”
“I do listen--”
“No! I get it.” You caved, bringing your voice back down but it is far more in frustration. “I get what you do. I am not asking you to give it up. I am asking you to be careful.” The last few words had come out as a plea and the fury and annoyance Jason had disappeared.
“That’s just part of the job.” Jason tried to defend softly this time.
“We both know you can be more careful, Jay.” You said it so candidly that Jason felt guilty for not trying harder. You were right. “Uh…I, uh, I had a nightmare a few nights ago.” You confessed. “And, uh, it was about you. And I’ve been thinking about it ever since because it felt really real. And then today…it just…” You shook your head. “This has been…the best year of my life.” You admitted as your chin started to wrinkle and your bottom lip quivered. “Because of you so I think…about losing you and I feel like I can’t breathe.”
Jason almost felt frozen because he couldn't tell where this was going to go and he wasn’t sure where he wanted it to go. The only thing he did know was that he didn't want you worrying so much about him and he felt guilty for putting it on you.
“I know it’s part of the job.” You nodded easily. “I know. I do it, too. But that doesn't make it hurt any less.” You admitted. “And I just…I wish you would be a little bit more careful because I love you.”
Everything froze for Jason. The idea of being loved is almost something he had chased for so long, he never thought he’d get it. He always chased it only to bite it when it comes close to him. It’s scary. The idea of someone loving him and him loving someone else. What if he fucks it up like he’s done to everything else? He couldn't believe he hadn’t fucked this up yet. You’ve clocked him self-sabotaging a few times, he hadn’t in a while but you caught it. You swore he never needed to because you liked him for him. You didn’t care about the dark and scary shit inside his head or the things he’d done. That never mattered to you because he is kind and a good person. He never could believe it but he chose to trust you anyway. And now he was standing here and he had no idea what to do because he could run but the idea of that made him want to burn through the floor.
“What?” Jason finally got out.
“I love you.” You said it again, honestly. It wasn't really how you wanted to tell him. You knew you would eventually but Jason can be a little skittish so you only wanted to do it when you thought he was ready to hear it. You were not sure if he was ready but you couldn't hide it from him anymore. “It’s okay if you don’t feel that way.” You nodded your head even if you didn’t think that was the problem. “Or if you’re unsure if you can say it. I just…I wanted to tell you so maybe…” You had let out a breath. “You’ll know why I worry and I want you to be more careful. I know that…this might not go the way we want in the end but…I just want you to try.”
He thought he didn’t deserve you. He did not deserve that sort of kindness or care or worry but you offered it so easily. You offered it to him as if it was the same as taking a breath. You offered an understanding with it. It’s something even Jason didn’t think about much, you being the one that didn’t make it home. He pushed it away because he felt like he might fall into the center of the earth if that would happen. It would be earth-shattering to him if it were you. You were at least careful when you would go on patrol and he did think that would help, to know you tried to come home to him. It is not fair to not offer you the same deal.
Jason closed the distance between you and you didn’t think he’d say it back which was okay. It would hurt but he had told you so much. Ever since that night months ago when you asked about his childhood, he had told you so much. You knew about being homeless and the things he has witnessed even as a child. You knew. You knew the horrors he had encountered through his life and if it were you, you weren't so sure you would offer those words. But just because he may not be able to say them, did not mean he did not deserve to know how you felt. That did not mean he did not deserve to know people loved him and they wanted him to stay alive. It would hurt but you thought it’d be fine because you knew he loved you.
“I’m sorry, princess.” Jason stated, his voice rough and honest as a hand came to your cheek. His thumb rubbed over your cheek as you nodded against him. “I’ll be careful.” He stated. “I didn’t know.” He admitted.
“I know.” You started back, eyes locked on his. They were red and his eyes were a deep shade of blue like he was on the verge of bursting into tears. “That’s why I told you.”
“Promise, I’ll be more careful out there.” Jason nodded down at you. “I, uh…” Jason pulled in a breath. “I love you, too.” He said carefully but honestly as a gentle smile came to your face.
“Was hoping you did.” You nodded back at him. “I’m sorry for getting so mad. Just worry.”
“It’s okay.” Jason pulled you into him, his arms engulfing you. “I know you worry. I’m sorry for yelling back.” Jason apologized, placing a kiss to your head.
“Can we just get takeout?” You let out a soft laugh, looking up to him. “We can eat and watch some bad reality TV.”
Jason let out a laugh. “What food were you feeling?”
----
A sob rips through Jason’s throat, clawing its way into the cold of Gotham’s air. His legs give out before he can catch a breath and he collapses onto the pavement of the roof. It all hurts. Every piece of his body is aching and crashing like it never should have made it this far. His arms and legs shake as he turns to rest his back against the ledge. He pulls his legs to his chest as his face becomes soaked in his own tears. His lungs start to burn with every sob as he can’t get a full breath in. The world around him starts to spin and it all hurts. Why does it have to hurt so much? He loves you and he will always love you and it will always be painful.
----
Lightning ripped through the sky and you were handling yourself as you always did. You were good on your own. But that night, five days ago, was different. It was different because it was not some big bad that would be the cause. All of that was going so well. It was a simple mistake. Wrong timing. An accident.
Jason had been fighting one of the goons, a nasty fistfight. The goon had some sort of training. Jason was confident, he’d beat him he put up a hell of a fight. It was a hell of a fight until it turned more brutal, getting more physical with punches and kicks, the goon picking Jason up and trying to throw him across the lot. It was getting messy while you were dealing with one of the metas. You were throwing lightning bolts as fast as you could manage while minding where Jason was. It should have been fine because you’d done this before. But, Jason tripped.
He tripped over something left on the ground and that gave the goon enough of a gap to grab him. When he was grabbed, Jason was thrown right into a pile of glass and metal just as you were throwing a lightning bolt in that direction at the meta. You missed Jason but you hit the reflective metals, sending the bolt back to you.
You went down immediately and Jason stopped breathing. The goon and meta took off while Jason was back on his feet, rushing over to you. Panic had flooded his body in that exact instant. You went down hard and the lightning threw you back. He knew.
He pulled your body into his lap, checking for a pulse and trying to feel if you were breathing only to find nothing. His hands were shaking so bad he could barely hold you in his lap.
He called your name with a tremble of his voice. “Come on, you gotta wake up.” He said it quietly, trying to keep himself together, desperately still trying to find a pulse. “Wake up.” He said it more sternly that time as he shook your head lightly.
You were lifeless in his lap and he was at a loss. What is he supposed to do?!
He moved to put your back on the ground and he started CPR before he used the comms to get ahold of Oracle. He told her what happened as he performed CPR, desperate to bring you back to him. You had to come back, right? It was your own lightning bolt. How can you be killed by your own powers? That sounds like such a rip-off. And Jason bit his sobs back because it shouldn’t have been you. It couldn't be you. It was supposed to be him because he needed to be more careful. He didn’t have powers. He already died before. He put a bomb in his helmet. It was supposed to be him to go first but you were not breathing.
You wouldn't breathe.
He tried and he tried until the other bats started showing to offer some help. He tried and tried and tried and it wasn’t good enough because the lightning was too much and he was clumsy. He fucking tripped and he slipped and that was it. It led you to getting hurt. It led you to getting killed. It is all his fault.
----
Jason’s hands cover his face as he keeps sobbing, nausea filling his stomach. His stomach is in agonizing pain and he can’t bear to even attempt to pull himself together. What is he supposed to do? It’s his fault. He can never forgive himself for it and he knows it. You deserved better and he should have just said no three years ago. Had he just turned you down, you’d be alive and off somewhere living your life. Had he just been more careful. It doesn’t matter that everyone has tried to convince him it wasn’t his fault because he always sees it that way. And he misses you.
He wakes up and he misses you and that’s if he can even get any damn sleep. He wakes up and he misses you and he tries to eat and he misses you. Bruce comes over to check on him and he misses you. He sees some of your stuff littered over his apartment and he misses you. His entire chest feels like it might cave right in every single second of every day. It’s as if he is dragging his feet from one minute to the next with no real destination or desire. He moves because he has no choice. He just wants the pain to stop. He wants you back. You didn’t deserve to die.
How he is ever supposed to move on from this? From you?
The memories he once looked back on are now tainted with pain. And that is the only thing he has left of you. What is he supposed to do?
How is he supposed to live with the pain of losing you?
Hands rest on Jason’s knees, gentle and soft, gathering Jason’s attention. Jason’s own sobs were so loud, he entirely missed the presence of another person coming onto the roof with him and he missed the sound of footsteps approaching and then stopping in front of him. He missed it all and not a single part of him even cares. But, he looks up anyway and his breath catches in his throat as his eyes widen. How?
“Jay?” Your voice is quiet and broken with the sight of him.
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#jason todd x reader#jason todd x you#red hood x reader#red hood x you#jason todd fanfic#jason todd fanfiction#dc fanfic#dc fanfiction
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Serenade of Shadows
I : A Dance of Shadows -> II : Whisper of Deceit -> III : A Symphony of Heartbreak -> IV : Fractured Reflections -> V : Shadows of Allegiance-> VI : Echoes of Decent
Series Masterlist
Young!Coriolanus Snow x Fem!reader
warnings: Arranged marriage, MILD ANGST, unrequited love, friends to enemies, enemies to lovers
Reader's surname : Flare
Time frame: Before, during and after tbosbas
Synopsis : In the events of Panem's political dynamics and the 10th annual Hunger Games, Coriolanus Snow and her find themselves entwined. Standing at the brink of an enforced union, 6 years later, their mutual trust unravels amidst a damaging misinterpretation, prompting Coriolanus to believe the wrong. As the glacial barriers guarding his emotions begin to melt, a revelation of profound feelings unfolds, initiating a sprint against time for redemption.
The Academy bore witness a friendship that would echo through the corridors of time. In the their youth, Coriolanus Snow and her forged bonds that transcended the boundaries of academic pursuits.
Their journey through the Academy was a dance of shared laughter, intellectual banter, and the unspoken friendship that defined their connection. She was a vibrant force of creativity, and Coriolanus Snow was no different.
"Coryo, have you ever wondered what lies beyond these walls? The world beyond our textbooks and exams?"
Snow, his eyes focused on the distant horizon, considered the question.
"The future is a realm of uncertainties, Flare. I prefer to focus on the present."
She persisted, her enthusiasm undiminished. "But what if we could shape our own destinies? Break free from the expectations of the Capitol?"
He regarded her, a hint of curiosity in his gaze. "Our paths are preordained but the Capitol is our life."
Their classes became a sanctuary of shared aspirations and mutual understanding.
As the sun dipped below the Capitol skyline, casting a warm glow across the Academy courtyard, she broached the unspoken realm of their connection.
"do you ever think about us? beyond the expectations placed upon us?"
Snow, caught off guard, allowed a rare smile to grace his stoic features.
"What do you mean ?"
"Forget what I said, the reaping day is coming, do you think they'll announce who's gonna get the Plinth Prize ?"
She knew it must be him who gets the prize. She knew he needed it more than she does.
In those fleeting moments, beneath the shadows of the Academy's pillars, a subtle dance of emotions unfolded.
His face sparked a smile, hoping that it would be himself who got the prize,after all, he wouldn't want his hard work to go into waste.
"I hope so..." he let out a long breath while looking at the smiling girl in her red uniform
Unbeknownst to him, she harbored a sentiment deeper than friendship, a quiet flame that flickered in the recesses of her heart.
Reaping day approached with a sense of urgency, the anticipation hung in the air, threading through the classrooms like an unspoken undercurrent.
One evening, in the dim glow of the Academy library, she dared to tread the delicate ground of vulnerability.
"I would really fail any exam just so you can get the prize, Coryo."
He met her gaze,
"Why would you do that ?"
She gently grabbed his hands
"you're the one who has every reason in this world to get it more than anyone, you're Coriolanus Snow, look at how far we've come, you're gonna be someone amazing in Panem."
His heart stopped beating, confused at how she was reacting. No one believes in him like she did. No one had faith in him like she did.
A gentle smile was plastered across his face,
"you're gonna be an amazing woman as well. Panem is going to look at you one day and be grateful that you are born into this world."
Their final days were a montage of shared dreams and sidelong glances, the unspoken understanding between them growing into something deeper.
Yet, in the delicate dance of emotions, Corio remained oblivious to the blossoming romance that she harbored.
The Reaping Day arrived, casting a pall over the top 24 students of the Academy. She wore a stunning nude colored corset dress, that embraced her curves, featuring sleeves that gracefully hug her arms. The dress emphasized her collarbones, adding an elegant touch. Her hairstyle complements the look with soft waves cascading down her shoulders, framing her face and enhancing the overall sophistication of the ensemble.
Coryo and her sat side by side, hearing the announcement from Dean Highbottom of the obligatory mentorship to the tributes. They sat as names intertwined in the cruel lottery of tributes.
A silent understanding passed between them, a shared acknowledgment of the dangerous journey that awaited. They did not know what they were getting into.
"District 8, boy, y/n Flare"
Her eyes looked over the screen of a boy named Bobbins, hope glimmered across her eyes, only wishing the best for her tribute.
"District 12, girl goes to Coriolanus Snow"
As Lucy Gray Baird is called forth as a tribute during the reaping day, her demeanor contrasts the somber atmosphere. She wore a dress that catches the light, its colors reminiscent of the wild.
Despite the gravity of the moment, the district 12 female tribute's gaze holds a spark of defiance, and her posture exudes a quiet strength. The curls of her hair cascade down, a vivid contrast against the muted tones of the crowd. In that pivotal moment, Flare knew that Lucy Gray stands as a symbol of resilience and individuality.
Snow and Flare locked eyes,
they were saying good luck internally to each other.
Snow and her were determined to make a winner out of their tributes.
She was impressed with how Bobbin managed to captivate the audience by explaining five different ways to kill someone with a sewing needle.
Then, when she was asleep during the night of Day one, unbeknownst to her, Snow had left the academy to the arena on a mission to get his friend Sejanus out.
Coriolanus Snow experiences a tumult of conflicting emotions when he killed Bobbin, Flare's tribute.
The act weighs heavily on him, and a sense of remorse and unease lingers.
Coryo grapples with the harsh reality of the Games and the choices it forces upon him, questioning the morality of his actions. The incident leaves an ineradicable mark on his conscience, he decides never to let this be known.
Especially her.
Her eyes widened, a sudden jolt coursing through her body as fact that her tribute died sank in. Her breath caught, a sharp inhale betraying the shock that gripped her. The world felt suspended, and disbelief etched itself across her face, a mask of astonishment and heart-wrenching realization.
There was no recording of her tribute dying, which is impossible. Bobbin could have not died suddenly.
Someone must've killed him.
Her brows furrowed, caught in the turbulent mixture of emotion. Confusion knit lines across her forehead as she struggled to make sense of the unfolding situation.
Then anger simmered beneath the surface, her eyes flashing with an intensity fueled by frustration and disbelief. It was a storm of conflicting feelings, each wave crashing into the next, leaving her torn between the chaos of confusion and the fiery surge of anger.
The air around her crackled with unresolved emotions, a volatile blend that painted her expression with a mix of perplexity and a smoldering indignation.
She eyed the boy who she had feelings for,
"It's not fair, there's no record of anyone killing him, the broadcast must've been frozen or someone must've sabotaged him" she insisted
With a remorseful gaze, he uttered, "I'm sorry, Flare," his apologetic words weaving through the air, a confession concealed as she remained oblivious to the intricacies of his furtive actions.
Her heavy steps lead her outside the room, a storm of anger in her eyes and a resolute determination fueling every step, driven by a resolute need to unravel the mysteries of what actually happened.
___
"I need to know the truth" She whispered in a hushed tones, slipping a bundle of cash to the shadowy figure.
As she gazed over the surveillance camera, a tidal wave of emotions crashed through her, leaving devastation in its wake.
Sejanus and Coryo running for their lives as Bobbin chased after them. She then witnessed the gruesome murder of her tribute and mentee. The betrayal cut deep, an unseen dagger thrust into the core of her trust. Shock mingled with disbelief, and a profound ache settled in her chest.
The echoes of their shared moments, the laughter, and camaraderie, now tainted by the stain of his actions, echoed through her mind.
Anguish painted her features, and the realization of his betrayal felt like the shattering of something precious. In that moment, innocence crumbled, replaced by a raw, searing pain that marked the end of the girl who once believed in him.
She whispered, "Coriolanus Snow, how could you?"
The elusive figure responded, "Truth has its own price, my dear."
Faced with an intricate choice, even in betrayal, she sought salvation for Coriolanus,
'Protect him, even if it means sacrificing Sejanus.' she said to herself.
The web of deceit tightened, capturing Coryo in the damning revelation despite her desperate gambit to shift the blame to Sejanus.
The clacking sounds of her heels sounded through the hallway as she made her way to Dean Casca Highbottom.
"I have something to report, Mr Highbottom."
As she began unraveling the narrative, detailing Sejanus's involvement, a chilling revelation interrupted her desperate plea.
"You do know that your dear Coriolanus has been involved in cheating." Shock seized her as the revelation unfolded – Coriolanus Snow, the very person she sought to protect, exposed for his deceit.
The weight of betrayal and the magnitude of his cunning unfolded before her eyes. In that moment, she stood frozen, grappling with the stark truth that shattered the illusions she held.
What more did he do ? Who is he becoming ? This isn't the Coryo she knew.
Dean disclosed Snow's cheating endeavors, providing Lucy Gray with a compact powder with rat poison and a handkerchief bearing his father's emblem.
Her efforts to shield Coriolanus crumbled in the face of Snow's deceit.
"You did this because you knew he killed your dear tribute ? Poor little girl, how stupid"
"How did you-"
"Oh I know dear, I know..."
Dean's stern words echoed the futility of her attempts to protect someone who had betrayed not only her trust but the very essence of the Games' integrity.
Then came the turning point, a twist of fate that would cast a long shadow over their friendship.
Dean's voice cut through the tense air like a blade.
___
"What about Lucy Gray ?" Snow worriedly asked
"I would be worried about your own future if I were you" Dean spoke
"Miss Flare, your dear friend, has been quite forthcoming about your involvement."
Snow, unaware of the orchestrated trap, felt the ground beneath him tremble.
"Flare?" he questioned, the word heavy with disbelief.
Dean nodded, his expression a mask of stern authority. His accusatory gaze bore into Snow as he spoke with calculated precision.
"Miss Flare has disclosed your attempt to cheat in the Hunger Games. She provided detailed accounts of your covert actions, betraying not only the trust of your fellow tributes but also the integrity of the Games."
Snow's eyes widened in disbelief, a storm of emotions churning within him. "Flare? She told you about this?"
Dean nodded, maintaining an air of authority. "Yes, Snow. She confessed, hoping to shield you, but the truth has an uncanny way of surfacing."
"Also, she was feeling rather....furious that you killed her tribute"
The revelation left Snow grappling with a profound sense of betrayal, as Flare's desperate gambit to protect him morphed into an unexpected accusation that threatened to shatter his carefully constructed world.
The revelation hung in the air, a sinister turn of events that spun a narrative of betrayal. The trap tightened, ensnaring Snow in a web of deceit orchestrated by the very person he trusted.
Accusations of betrayal surfaced, linking her to covert strategies that backfired in the arena. The Capitol, always hungry for drama, reveled in the narrative of treachery.
Betrayal, however, was a phantom that haunted the shadows of truth. Snow, consumed by the bitterness of perceived betrayal, severed ties with her.
The friendship that weathered the storms of academia crumbled, leaving behind the echoes of what could have been.
Emotions surged through Snow like a tumultuous tide, his initial disbelief morphing into an overwhelming sense of anger.
The disclosure of Flare's admission, initially perceived as a protective act, now felt like an unexpected betrayal.
Dean's words, delivered with meticulous precision, only added fuel to Snow's rising fury. The burden of betrayal pressed heavily on him, as the realization dawned that Flare, in her attempt to shield him, had unintentionally entangled him in her admission.
Snow's eyes glowed with resentment, and an intense anger gripped him, a blazing fire stoked by the unforeseen turn of events, jeopardizing not only his standing but the very core of everything.
---Present Day----
Stuck in the present, their eyes mirroring the weight of untold histories. The grandeur of their wedding day was now tainted by the lingering shadows of a friendship lost.
In the quiet of their shared existence, as the Capitol reveled in the celebration of their union, the dance through time echoed with the poignant melodies of what once was. Snow, bound by duty, and she, she trapped in a loveless union, were left to navigate the intricate steps of a dance that transcended the boundaries of past and present. The grand wedding, a tableau of splendor, concealed the intricate dance of hearts left in the shadows.
taglist : @randomgurl2326
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MDNI |18+| König x Reader
TW- slightly suggestive, explicit language & sexual content.
“Prisoner Of War”
“Du bist gut, Schatz. But, I’m better.”
(You are good, Dear.)
For years, you’ve been on König’s radar.
You were quite the problem.
Always two steps ahead and leaving pandemonium behind.
What was supposed to be a simple contract ended up being a diverting game of cat and mouse. Admittedly, the hunt was exhilarating. It wasn’t everyday he encountered someone with your set of skills.
Unpredictable. Cunning. Dangerous.
But, needless to say, all games must come to an end.
His boots scuffed the asphalt, slowly pacing with his hands clasped behind his back, savoring the celebratory taste of victory like it were an old fashioned cocktail. The steel blue gaze that peered underneath his sniper hood, did nothing compared to the metal cuffs chafing your wrists raw.
“Es tut mir Leid, wunderschön. (I’m sorry, beautiful.)”
His tone full of mockery. “I had to ensure you weren’t going anywhere.”
A disdainful scoff pushes past your lips in response, your legs cross with confident ease. “Why, afraid you’ll never see me again and miss me too much?”
Despite the many encounters, König had forgotten that smart ass mouth of yours. It always did something to him. Never once in the years he’s worked as a mercenary, has anyone ever talked to him in such a manner.
Only you.
“Such insolence…” He snarled, forging his tone with disgust as he circled back to stand behind you with his eyes boring into the back of your head. “Did you forget who graced you by sparing your pitiful life or do I need to remind you?”
Your lips pursed at the very question with the memory of your humiliating defeat thrown back in your face.
Vexation spindles within as you dwell on how you were so blinded by arrogance that it left yourself wide open, practically handed him the win.
Just to prove a point, the thick metal chains rattle when König’s large hands suddenly slammed down on either side of you with his body pressing against your back, caging you in nothing but pure muscle and authority.
“I believe I asked you a question, Schatz. (Dear.)”
König’s voice sunk to a low octave as he slouched down, the fabric of his hood lightly brushes the outer part of your ear and you feel the warmth of his breath through the material, completely electrifying your nerve endings.
In turn, he couldn’t help but notice how tame you’ve become. A flicker of unwarranted desire reflects in König’s eyes as they trail the column of your throat, a conquering smile crept onto his face when he saw you swallow, a negligible detail that only a keen eye would catch.
“Sag mir nicht, dass du nervös bist. (Don't tell me you're nervous.)” König purrs.
“Don’t make me fucking laugh…” You hissed out with potent venom.
The moment your head snaps to the side, König’s hand instantaneously latched onto your jowl with a firm grip, wedging a breath in your throat as he forcibly tilted your head back to meet with his imperious gaze.
“I warned you about this filthy little mouth of yours.”
The air sprouts with pending venereal tension when his pointer finger glides over to tantalize your plumped bottom lip. Your panties pool when he inserts his finger into your mouth, your mind shuts off and your body takes over as you begin to steadily suck. König’s chest vibrates in amazement yet he fascinated by your brazen behavior.
Your tongue swirls expertly around while bobbing your head to take in each digit in a rhythmic trend, his muscles flexed at the sensation of you gagging from the length of his finger, driving it deeper into the back of your throat.
“Fucking whore.”
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His Love
|Aegon II Targaryen x Fem!Reader|
Part Four
Master List of Series
Summary: Being a bastard born in the slums of Flea Bottom was all you were known for. Not the streak of white you had in your dark hair, the violet ring around your pupils, or how your sharp tongue and skills with the blade resembled your father, Daemon Targaryen. You were just a bastard, nothing more, but to him, to Aegon Targaryen, you were everything. You were his love.
Author's Note: Hello, everyone! School is now back in full swing for me, and it's been hella stressful, but I wanted y'all to know I'll be updating every two weeks now. I wanted to thank you for the continuous support you have shown me, even those who haven't commented and such. I see you! Things are starting to heat up now, so stay with me as the story progresses! <3
Chapter Warnings: Minor x Minor sexual situations, Aegon and you being absolute heathens.
A snore woke the eldest Prince up, eyelids fluttering at the noise below him.
His sweet girl was fast asleep, tired from a long day exploring the many things King's Landing had to offer. Aegon ordered the guests in the private room to leave some time ago, wanting personal time with his dragon.
He had wanted to go farther with you but thought better of it. He knew you would leave him at the drop of a needle if he did anything that displeased you.
You were a more outspoken and self-assured young woman than many of the so-called "Lords" in the royal court. Aegon admired you for that.
Gods. His life could have been so different if Daemon had known about you. If that bitch Madam had not hidden you away from him for so long. He wanted to make up for that lost time, knowing what it could have been like now.
Ser Erryk Cargyll had finally decided to find the crowned Prince. He knew Aegon would have his fun and eventually head back to the Red Keep, but it had been nearly a day and a half, and Aegon still had yet to return. He soon found out why seeing an unconscious girl on top of him. Ser Erryk did not question it, only looking at the child with pity. He could only imagine what Aegon had subjected her to. Erryk shoved the girl off him, her still heavily drunk body flopping onto the floor.
Aegon had tasted the forbidden fruit; he realized as he drifted off into a slumber similar to your own, falling asleep within seconds.
You groaned, rolling onto your side as you pried your eyes open. The different concoctions of alcohol still coursed through your veins, your vision only slight blobs of color in the dim light. It was a rude awaking. Your annoyance at whoever threw you off the bed and onto the tile floor was intense. You had thought, how dare they wake you up as you raised into a seated position. Sitting upright did not help your need for rest, feeling as if gravity was pushing you into the floor.
Erryk touched Prince Aegon's shoulder, attempting to spare him some dignity of respect for the crown. Of course, Aegon didn't budge, sound asleep to dreams of soft, nimble fingers running through his short hair, nails scraping his scalp.
"My Prince." Erryk tried again to wake Aegon, but he was far too gone, the endless cups taking their toll.
You tilted your head at the man and saw a blurry outline of what looked like a shiny rectangle, sparkles dotting your vision.
What was a rectangle doing waking up the crowned Prince? You couldn't help but giggle as you saw them move Aegon again, he ignoring the intruder and rolling on his side. Aegon could handle his alcohol during the process, but Gods help anyone who tried to mess with him after.
"Your grace, you must wake up," he asked, louder this time. Aegon groaned, smacking the man's hands away as he flopped down into his pillow.
You laughed again, your heavy body thumping on the floor as you continued your drunken fit. The man glared down at you, annoyed that you found his current predicament amusing. You would be of little help in your state, even if you wanted to.
Ser Erryk was beginning to feel a familiar disdain bubble up inside him. He didn't know why Prince Aegon continually sullied the Targaryen's name.
After years of being chastised and embarrassed, drug back to the Red Keep day in and day out, having his Mother scream at him for the coffers he slowly drained, he ought to have learned. But he did not. Eyrrk felt that he never would, having been raised as an uncollared dog. He waited patiently for Aegon to be put on a leash-- put in his proper place. Whether it be by Rhaenyra taking her spot as the rightful heir to the Iron Throne, or a tampered glass of wine, he did not care.
"Aegon, I think he wants you to wake up," you teased from your spot on the ground, rolling slightly from the tingles in your limbs.
You were a drunken, uncontrollable giggling mess watching the man move about the room, finding a filled pitcher and pouring it onto the Prince's head. A muffled "No" sounded from the feather-tick pillow Aegon was smothering his face in. Your stomach hurt, your sides stitching as he shot up, gasping from the cold liquid as his shirt stained a pinkish color.
"I am glad you find my suffering amusing, little one," he jested, although glaring daggers at the man.
"Come, my Prince, it is midday, and your Father wishes your family to sup in honor of your Uncle's arrival." The man hoisted him up, his armor clinking as he wrapped his arm around Aegon's shoulder.
"My Uncle has dined with us many times before, Ser Erryk. I do not see the importance of this one," he protested, slumping over.
"Your King commands it, my Prince. It was not a suggestion," the man you have come to know as Ser Erryk said.
"The King demands it, or does my Mother? Do not lie to me. You know that man has not spoken coherently since he was put on The Poppy." Erryk pursed his lips, not dignifying the boy with a response.
You watched them with a slowly falling smile as he led Aegon to the exit, nearly tripping over the uneven floor. The terrifying thought of walking alone on the streets of Kings Landing caused you to let out a loud sob, quickly covering your mouth so no one could hear. You didn't know where to go, a hopeless feeling drowning you in your vulnerable state.
Aegon turned and saw your crumbled figure on the floor, your dark hair a mess from last night's sweating, dancing, and drinking. His little dragon, alone without a rider to claim her. He would have to remedy that.
"She comes with me." Aegon pointed to you, his words firm and no hint of second guesses. Ser Erryk scowled, questioning the Prince he served.
"The whore?" He asked bluntly, making you mirror his sour expression. But before you could speak, Aegon did it for you.
"She is not a whore," he defended you, and your heart melted. It felt different than how Madam would. Instead of the usual threats and yelling, he stood up for you. He said no great show of ruffled feathers and loud barking only, "she will return with us to the Red Keep and dine with my family."
Ser Cargyll wanted to protest and explain to the Prince how improper-- how insulting this would be to his Mother. To have a lowly whore dine with the royal family was... fitting for Aegon, he had to admit. You attempted to stand but fell back down onto the tile, heel catching on your dress. Heat covered your cheeks and ears from the embarrassment.
"Your grace, she cannot even stand," he said, a protest hidden behind the concern for your well-being.
"Then you will carry her," Aegon retorted as if it was apparent. He freed himself from the knight's grip, stumbling slightly as he regained his balance. "I can walk myself, Ser Erryk. Tend to the lady," he nodded in your direction.
Erryk did not challenge him anymore, understanding that refusing his request further could cost him his knighthood or possibly his life. He stomped with his white-plated armor, clinking with each step as he threw you over his shoulder. You squealed, kicking your legs on instinct as his cold metal breastplate jabbed into your stomach, but after a few steps and a sudden wave of nausea, you began to forget.
Balling your fists, you willed yourself not to vomit. A combination of pride and solely not wanting to hurl your entire belly gave you strength as you swayed over Ser Erryk's back.
Aegon was immensely annoyed at his Mother for cutting his enjoyable sleep short, but he found the whole ordeal amusing as the three of you left the brothel and smiled to himself. He knew tonight's dinner would change everything as he trailed behind on the path to the Red Keep, watching your face turn different shades of green. He was sure it would change for good, at least for him. Daemon wanted you for some reason or another, and Aegon was willing to bet that Rhaenyra had something to do with it. Daemon had no paternal bone in his body for girls, having been raised in a society that let men do as they please.
Though Aegon was drunk most of the time when the Valaryian girls visited the palace, he could still see how Daemon was disconnected from them. He could not train the pair in the art of the sword or take them to war, let alone have them attend the revelries he frequented. He still loved his children, but an arm's length was where he kept them. A blind man could see that.
Frankly, you had no idea where you were going at this point. Something about the Red Keep mentioned earlier was all you could remember, but you couldn't trust your memories yet. You could see flashes of black leather boots when you dared open your eyes, your head thumping in time with the steps. The soft rumble of male voices conversing in the background eased your discomfort, but you could not discern what they were saying. You faintly recognized the smooth timber of one of them, enough for you to calm.
Shouting soon clouded your senses instead, the sound of words being relayed to multiple people as a loud thud boomed in the air. You attempted to cover your ears, but the movement put all your weight on your stomach, and you let out a loud belch. You tried to hold your laughter back, hiding your face in Ser Erryk's armor. Another person joined your immaturity, which only served to foil any attempt at holding your composure.
The land between sleep and consciousness rocked you in its embrace the entirety of the day, or, at least, what you assumed it was. You hadn't strictly kept track of how much time had passed. Was it today, or was it the morrow? Or, somehow, in a wicked twist of karmic retribution, was it years from now?
Erryk stiffened at your childishness, unimpressed with how unladylike you were being. You were just as much of an embarrassment as him. He now understood why Aegon brought you along. The Queen would surely die from shame tonight. He mentally prepared for it, sending a silent prayer to The Seven as the three of you entered the Red Keep.
You would never drink again.
Sweat clung to your skin, a blanket of sticky fluids wrapped snuggly around your body as you tugged at your dress. Everything was too tight-- too hot. The woolen fabric trapped in all your heat as you wriggled like a babe attempting to escape its swaddle.
"What's wrong, little one," Aegon asked, his voice gravelly with sleep. You hadn't a clue where you were or how he got here, but you didn't care.
"Get this Gods forsaken dress off me," you demanded, still struggling in vain with the unforgiving fabric.
Aegon blinked at you, his hair in greasy white tangles and dark circles contrasting his pale skin. Surely you did not ask him to undress you. The Green Fairy must still be playing tricks on him.
"Aegon, help me," you whined. You managed to get your skirt stuck over your head, making the already troublesome task even more difficult. He sighed through his nose, playfully annoyed. He could never be cross with you.
He sat up and slid closer, flipping the outer layer of your dress back down before positioning you on your side. Aegon knew you could not keep yourself upright, electing to loosen the strings on your back before shimmying the fabric down.
He paused at the sight of your exposed shoulder. The dark hair of your scalp ran down the sides of your neck, fading into a fine fuzz that stood at his touch. He moved the long strands from your back, trailing his fingers down your bones like raindrops sliding on your flushed skin. You hummed in delight, rolling until your shoulder blades touched his cold chest. While you felt like a wood stove, he radiated a chill that swept the streets of Kings Landing during winter nights.
"That feels nice," you sighed absentmindedly, pulling on your sleeve to pop your arm out. "Gods, this is the worst," you mumbled.
The other sleeve refused to budge, cutting into the base of your neck as you flopped like a hooked fish trying to rip it off. He helped you again, sitting up and exposing your thin chemise.
Sweat stains covered the delicate fabric, the originally white coloring now a tan-yellowish color from days of skipped washing. Aegon didn't mind. He was well aware that he did not look much better after a night of drinking and fucking. It was one of the many reasons everyone within the castle walls turned their nose away from him.
He did not train his violet eyes on the dirty cloth but on what lay underneath. The protrusion of your shoulder blades, the outline of your back, and your shape. He felt himself stop breathing, gulping down a lump that formed in his throat at the personal view of your figure. To all others who glanced, you were a plain-looking girl, the only remarkable thing about you being the white streak in your hair. If only they took a moment more to look at you, they would see you for what you indeed are—a God amongst men.
"Still too hot," you groaned, moving your arms to take your underdress off. Aegon quickly grabbed your hand, stopping you from exposing yourself utterly bare in front of him.
"You must keep your modesty, sweetling," he said. The words almost sounded like a plead, an exemplary sentence to one's child.
He did not know where a sudden urge to protect your honor came from.
Aegon was never much for caring about his pride, let alone a woman's. He was known throughout the Seven Kingdoms for his debauchery, yet a bastard maiden from Flea Bottom brought out his conscience.
"I do not care, my Prince." Even with the words slurred out, he could still hear the condescension that came with his title. He pursed his lips, racking his brain for a way to redirect your attention from trying to unclothe yourself.
"How about some wine? To cool you off," he offered, but you shook your head vehemently, causing it to spin.
"No! No more wine Aegon; I cannot think straight." You looked as if you were about to vomit. The heat mixing with your upset stomach was a potent concoction that spelled disaster.
"Water then," he said, opening his chamber doors and barking the order to someone you couldn't see.
Aegon released a gasp when he turned back around, seeing you had ignored his warnings and attempted to take the chemise off yourself, your head somehow stuck in the armhole and your arms poking through the neck. His pupils dilated at the curve of your thighs, an almost invisible line of dark hair trailing down your stomach to a sparse tuft between your legs. All the blood in his body rushed to his cock, a jolt of arousal at seeing such indecent parts of you.
He wanted to pounce. He wanted to rip that damnable piece of clothing off your body and stuff it in your mouth as he claimed your maidenhood.
Hearing and touch were the only two senses left that weren't wholly distorted by the copious amount of alcohol you drank the night prior. Touch: the fabric of your smock strangling your limbs and rubbing your skin raw. Hearing: the floorboards creaking with someone's weight as they stepped closer to you.
A hand subconsciously slid down his side and hooked its thumb in the hemline of his trousers, relieving some of the pressure.
You felt your bondage loosen as the final piece of clothing left your body. It was like the first breath of spring, the golden sun bathing your skin with its comforting rays for the first time in months. You sighed, smiling and lying back on the bed with your freedom.
"Much better," you hummed, shutting your eyes and stretching your exerted muscles with a loud groan. The mattress dipped next to you, not the total weight of someone's body, as if they were kneeling, looking down upon your naked form.
A shuttering breath next to you opened your eyes, seeing Aegon leaning over you. He didn't seem like himself, his eyes black, the dim light from the troches reflecting in them. It was as if something had possessed him as he stared at your breasts, wetting his lips and bending closer to you. His hand reached out at speed almost too slow for one to notice, and his blunt fingertips trailed down the expanse of your chest, down to your sternum, and circled the underside of your bubby. Gooseflesh rose in his wake, your toes curled, and your nipples hardened as Aegon's finger slid over it. You moaned as a chill went through your body, finally cooling off.
His touch lit a fire within you, the same feeling from the pleasure house, but you weren't in a drunken haze this time. You were beginning to sober, all your senses finally returning. Your vision was apparent again as you saw Aegon shift himself over top of you, using his other hand as support on your shoulder. He bent down, his once violet eyes still black as he scanned your face, a taught expression on it. Jolts of pleasure went straight to your core as he pinched your budded nipple, capturing your lips with his in a mess of tongue and teeth.
The lack of inhibitions between the both of you back at the brothel served in favor of Aegon. You let him defile you without reservations, but the alcohol was nearly gone from your system, and you realized something was wrong with this. Your mind screamed it. But how could you stop? You didn't want to stop. You wanted to extend the sensations he was giving you; it was what your body wanted, what it needed.
He broke for air, trailing a line of open-mouth kisses down your jaw and neck, licking and nipping at the sensitive skin as he reached your chest. He continued groping at one breast, kneading the flesh with his hand as he latched on to the other, his lips sucking the perked bud. Aegon's grip on your body hurt, the skin tender from growth, but the pain surfaced something... primal. A deep moan came from your throat as your hands went into his hair, legs instinctively wrapping around his waist, moving on their own accord against him.
"Oh, Aegon," you whimpered, pulling on his hair until he released your tit with a pop. His chest heaved, grinding himself into your heat as his mouth returned to yours. His fingers tangled in your damp hair, cranking your head back to expose your neck, sucking harshly as you whimpered again.
"Your sounds are divine," he growled into your skin, "I must hear more."
Aegon bit onto a pulse point, causing you to cry out and your hands to yank the hair attached to his scalp. A muffled chuckle was all you heard from him as he let go and kissed down your body once more, not stopping past your chest or navel, creating small puddles of saliva.
Anticipation tightened in your stomach when he reached the top of your mound. The desire to move your hips, his lips on the buzzing spot, was all you could think about. Any hesitant thoughts from before were gone, your mind only chanting one thing.
"Please, Aegon."
He grinned, more than happy to oblige your pleas.
Aegon opened his mouth and used his flattened tongue to lick a stripe up your slit. He wrapped his lips around that sensitive button, sending waves of ecstasy throughout your body and making your thighs trap his head there. Your hips bucked, chasing his movements and moaning every time he hit that particular little bud. Your body became hot, your cheeks undoubtedly generating enough heat to warm even the coldest souls in the winter months.
You could feel sweat collect on your hairline and drip behind your ears as your hips moved in time with his ministrations, your insides wanting to clench around something. Aegon kissed your maidenhood as he did with your lips, creating the same building sensation as last night.
You felt his tongue dip inside you, using his thumb to continue the same focus he had with his mouth on your bud. His tongue felt terrific, hitting a specific spot inside you that made your nerves go wild, but you wanted more. You might not be able to reach the same peak as before if you did not. You needed something to hold on to, something deep within your body to keep you in place as you rode out your high.
"Aegon, I-I need..." You couldn't form a coherent sentence, every attempt foiled by a new wave of pleasure. "I need-Oh Gods-I need you..."
Despite hedonism, Aegon felt a deep emotion he had never experienced, feeling wanted. Since the day he was born, the first true-born Prince spent every moment of his life with those pushing him away in place of someone more fitting.
Rhaenyra has already taken his place as heir to the Iron Throne and received all his father's praise and attention. Aemond, his ever-dutiful brother taking the spot as their Mothers favorite, and Helaena, the spot of their Grandfather's darling grandchild. He was left with no place in his family besides as a pawn to be put on the throne, but with you, oh, with you, he felt like he belonged.
A girl he had hardly known for a day made him feel like he was needed solely for himself and not the potential of what he could be.
Something twisted inside him then, a feeling of dark, unhealthy obsession blooming in his mind.
Mine, was all he could think, only mine. Only my darling girl. No one-- nothing can take her from me. She is mine, only mine, mine, mine.
"What do you need, my little dragon?" Aegon asked sweetly, vastly differing from his possessive thoughts.
Mine, mine, mine.
"I-I need something inside of me. I do not think I can reach my peak without it. Without you." He could see the tears leaking from your eyes, your face flushed with frustrated pleasure. Seeing you in such a weakened state only fueled his darkened mind, unable to deny you of your request.
Of course, Aegon wanted to take your maidenhead, he would not let the idea of anyone else cross his mind, but this couldn't be the time. You were not his wholly. You were just a young girl, intoxicated by the newfound pleasures a man could give. He couldn't fault you for that; he remembers feeling the same at your age. He still had a small amount of decency within him and knew that you would live to regret having him take your virtue in the future. He wanted you in your entirety—mind, body, and soul.
He parted from your mound, his thumb still rubbing your button as he traced a finger around your hole. "I shall not deny you, sweetling," he plainly said as a singular digit entered you.
It provided much repreave, yet still not deep enough. Your disappointment soon overshadowed as he stuck his mouth to your button and curled his finger inside you.
Your high mounted, quick, wild horses ran through your hollow bones as he pulled your release from you. He did not stop until your legs went limp around his head, and your body went slack, small whimpers coming from your lips. Your hands went to his hair, pushing his face deeper into your wet core as you let pure ecstasy run through you, singing Aegon's praises.
Finally, he pulled away, his chin glistening from the juices inside your heat as he brought the finger he used inside his waiting mouth. You still saw stars as he flopped down next to you, catching his breath as if he had just finished sprinting. Aegon wore a smile you mirrored as you scooted closer to him, placing your head on his shoulder.
He had given you many opportunities to explore new things, and you did not know how to thank him. Words could not convert your gratefulness properly. You moved your hand across his chest, creating a pattern similar to the one he made on your breasts as he closed his eyes and sighed contentiously, pulling you closer.
Your fingers trailed down the expanse of his soft stomach, following the line of blonde hair down to his trousers. He didn't open his eyes as you traced the outline of his rigid member, only quirking a brow.
"What are you doing, little one," he questioned with a look. You could feel his cock twitch underneath your fingers.
"You have shown me so many things I had no idea of, exposed me to the pleasures of man, and I am eternally grateful for that. Should I not do the same?" You rubbed your palm against him, and you saw his stomach tense. "You will help me, won't you? I am still not entirely experienced yet," you said sheepishly.
"Of course I will," he agreed and kissed the knuckles of your other hand.
A knock interrupted your moment. Aegon groaned in annoyance, rolling his eyes. "Go away," he commanded as he grabbed your hand to move again.
"Your Grace, I have brought the water you requested," a weak female voice sounded through the thick wooden doors.
Your mouth suddenly felt parched, remembering how thirsty you had been earlier. Aegon looked down at you, questioning if you still wanted it, then sighed, telling the servant to bring it in.
You had completely forgotten you were still naked, your palm over Aegon's cock as she entered, releasing a short gasp at the sight. He rolled his eyes again, signaling her to put the pitcher and cups on a table across the room as he kept your hand in place.
Aegon had not let you stop your movements on his prick, maintaining eye contact the entire time the servant scurried around his rooms. You knew you should have felt disgusted with the shame of displaying something so sexual and vulgar in front of a poor serving girl, but you didn't. The impropriety of it was what you loved, sending a pleasant warmth throughout your body.
The girl stood silently, hands clasped in front of her red uniform dress and gaze downcast.
"You may go," Aegon said pointedly, annoyed that she couldn't read that her task was finished.
"Yes," she nodded, curtsying out of respect for his position, "thank you, your grace." And she left his chambers in a flurry of skirts and crimson.
You could see that Aegon wanted to continue as if you hadn't been sorely interrupted, but your thirst was unimaginable, and you pouted your lip. He sighed, moving slightly to let you get a drink. It felt as if the ground was vibrating as you walked over, needing to move from chair to table to chair again to stay upright. You had seen men walk out of rooms like this at Madam's brothel, snickering to yourself in the shadows away from their eyes. It was ironic you did the same.
You could feel Aegon's stare on your back as you poured yourself a glass, not thinking to offer him some. Not moments later, another knock on his door sounded, a more mature female voice coming through it.
"My Prince," she began, pausing for a moment longer than reasonable, "I believe I may have found a dress befitting your guest." You looked at Aegon, perplexed as to why you needed another set of clothes. A flurry of questions arose in your mind, reality finally catching you as you took in your surroundings.
You were in His Majesty, Prince Aegon Targaryen, Second of His Name, Son of Viserys, the Peaceful, bed chambers. How had you gotten to this moment? The last memory you had was of Ma yelling at you, kicking you out of the only home you had ever known, and then Aegon. It was all Aegon. His smiling face dragged you across Kings Landing, stuffing your face with foods Ma could never afford. His laugh echoed in your mind as he threw back drink after drink. His sweet words whispered in your ear as he made you feel the greatest pleasures of man.
"Your Grace, I am feeling quite ill. I wish to be taken home." You had acted too immaturely and rashly after what happened with Ma. She was the only true mother you had known, and you were her only daughter. She loved you-- loves you.
"What are you going on about, my sweet? You are home," Aegon dismissed, shifting himself in the blankets.
"No, Aegon." You placed the water on the table and gave him your full attention. "This is the Red Keep. Your home," you replied pointedly.
"This is your home now; I thought you realized this." He was starting to get annoyed with explaining the obvious to someone he thought was clever.
"Why on the Seven's green Earth would this ever be my home," you asked sarcastically, curling your lip incredulity and crossing your arms. "If you are attempting to make you your whore, you are sorely mistaken."
He groaned, rolling the blankets and shifting the pillows as he failed to get comfortable. "You are not my whore. I did not expect you to be."
You stormed over to the resting Prince, forgetting that you were still naked as the day you were born.
"How dare you think you can keep me here! I may not have the power to order people around as you do, but I have authority over my own life!" He scoffed and rolled over, refusing to meet your angry gaze.
"Not anymore," he mumbled more to himself than you.
"I do not care what you believe. I am leaving this place." You stormed around the room, a blaze of fury in your steps as you pulled your smock on and tied your outer dress just enough to cover your modesty.
He didn't try to stop you, only watching as you took one last swig of water before shoving his chamber room doors open. You had been a fool. The stupid young, naive girl you had tried so hard not to be. It was ignorant to think that Aegon wouldn't be like the men you heard the working girls complain about when he was most likely the one they spoke of the most. He was a disgusting, vile creature, and you never wanted to see him again.
The guard stationed outside his room looked at you with an unreadable expression, his armor a polished white as he stood tall. He seemed familiar, but his garb was different from the City Watch. You supposed he must have been far on the hierarchy of knights never to have seen him.
"I apologize, my lady, but I cannot allow you to leave," he said gravely, stepping in front of you.
You spun to face Aegon, the man still not having moved from his spot on the bed.
"Tell him to let me leave," you nearly shouted, but he ignored you. "Aegon, tell your guard to let me leave. Now!" This time, you did yell, done with all the games the eldest Prince played. They were no longer fun.
"Lead the woman to the Guest Wing," he flicked his wrist as if he was swatting a fly. "See to it she is fed and made to rest until called upon. We have had a long night."
You felt as if smoke was pouring from your ears, marching over to Aegon as his guard caught you by the shoulder, nearly causing you to fall back.
"Yes, my Prince." He nodded stiffly, pulling you to where you assumed the Guest Wing was.
"Oh, and Ser Eyrrk?" The knight stopped his movements abruptly, turning to face the boy he was sworn to protect. "Be sure to show me the dress the servant choose." Aegon paused, looking over your lust-stained clothes. "She is an honored guest of House Targaryen; she deserves to be robed as such."
Master List of Series
Ser Erryk nodded once more and continued to lead you down the dark and barren halls of the Red Keep.
The song called The Fruits by Paris Paloma heavily inspired this chapter. Link here! I also have a playlist I listen to when I write. Link here! If you have any questions about the story regarding the ages of characters, descriptions, etc... don't hesitate to ask me! Thank you so much for your patience. I hope the chapter lived up to your expectations. *.*
Tagged Peeps: @zeennnnnnn, @malfoytargaryen, @targaryencore, @justasmallbean, @alexandra-001, @buckysmainhxe, @omgsuperstarg, @sommornyte, @minttea07, @silverslive, @unclecrunkle, @prettykinkysoul, @duesobabe, @djlexi, @ynbutbetter, @honestlykat, @graykageyama, @legolas017, @iiamthehybrid, @brezzybfan, @ladybug0095, @millies0bsimp, @kalfilit, @sheislonelyalways, @tempt-ress, @bellameshipper, @minttea07, @trikigirl271, @esposadomd
#aegon x you#aegon the second#aegon ii#aegon the usurper#hotd aegon#aegon x y/n#aegon smut#aegon fanfic#aegon targaryen smut#aegon targaryen ii#aegon targaryen fanfic#aegon targaryen x reader#aegon targaryen#aegon x reader#female reader#reader insert#aegon targaryen x you#aegon ii targaryen x reader#aegon ii targaryen#house of the dragon#game of thrones#house targaryen#hotd fanfic#daemon targaryen#daemon x rhaenyra#hotd x reader#prince aegon#aegon ii fanfic#tom glynn carney
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: ̗̀➛ I'm proud to say that I'm a part of the TWST collab ("who does the prefect like?") hosted by @dulcesiabits!!! I hope that you all enjoy this╰(⸝⸝⸝´꒳`⸝⸝⸝)╯💖💖
—❥ ᴅᴀʀʟɪɴɢ ɪ ғᴀɴᴄʏ ʏᴏᴜ
warnings: none
genre: romance, fluff, (attempted) comedy
pairing: riddle rosehearts x gn!reader (+ platonic first years hehe)
word count: 884
extra notes: the reader is the ramshackle prefect!
♪ london boy – taylor swift
—♡ “Do you know why we called you here for this meeting, (Y/N)?”
“Uhh. . .This is my dorm, y’know, you’re the ones who asked to come over–”
“That’s besides the point!”
“The point is. . .”
“We know you’re dating Riddle.” ♡—
『••♡••』
So, you’re probably wondering how this all started. Well then. . .Let’s start from the beginning, shall we?
— ʚ The Study ‘Dates’ ɞ
It all started with a small study date. It wasn’t even a date at the time, it was just Riddle helping you study for a test (as repayment for helping him round up some loose hedgehogs a few days prior).
The other first years didn’t really think anything of it at the time but they didn’t expect the study ‘dates’ to keep happening. It even got to the point where you were cancelling plans with them just because of these study sessions with Riddle. But hey, maybe it was just you wanting to get good grades for you and Grim, right?
— ʚ Your Phone ɞ
Usually when you hung out with the first years, you would only use your phone to show them something funny or to use Google to prove someone (typically Ace) wrong about something.
But now something felt. . .off. You were looking at your phone a lot more often than normal and were even giggling at whatever was on your screen.
You’ve never giggled at your phone.
What was even weirder is that you would lay your phone faced down so no one could read your messages. People usually only did that when they were hiding something. That's when Ace came up with a quote-unquote ‘brilliant’ plan. (Spoiler alert: it backfired.)
— ʚ The Stupid Brilliant Plan ɞ
When Ace suggested following you and Riddle around to see what you both did, Sebek and Deuce were yelling about how it was an invasion of privacy but Epel didn’t seem to mind the idea. Jack didn’t even react other than slapping the palm of his hand onto his forehead at the stupid plan that Ace concocted.
Needless to say, the dumb idea was put into motion.
The group put on disguises they deemed as acceptable before following you to the library. So far the study session was normal. Just Riddle going through the subject and making sure you understood everything he was saying. Sure, there were a few moments where his knee brushed yours and he got a bit too close for the first years’ comfort, but nothing that could make them 100% sure whether you were dating Riddle or not.
They watched as you both put your textbooks into your bags and that's when they saw it. . .Your lips pressed against Riddle's in a simple yet sweet kiss. His hand interlocked with yours for a second, giving it a light squeeze before letting go. A smile that neither Ace or Deuce have ever seen graced Riddle's face—a smile that was full of love and a bit of shyness.
“My rose, what did I say about PDA?” The dorm head seemed anything but annoyed despite what his question may have implied. That smile never leaving, instead it simply grew when your hand reached for his yet again. “I know, sorry! I just couldn’t help it. Plus it’s not like anyone is around~♪”
BLEGH. That was the only thought running through the first years’ minds (minus Jack, he was just glad that you’re happy in all honesty). Ace and Deuce couldn’t believe their eyes. Their dorm head was secretly a softy but for their FRIEND? The two thought they were going to faint on the spot.
Before they threw up their lunch, they quickly ran back to Ramshackle.
“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!”
“RIDDLE? FOR REAL?!”
“THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING!”
“WHY WOULD THE HUMAN KEEP THIS FROM US IF THEY TRULY RESPECT US?!”
After your friends finished their mini breakdown, that’s when they decided it was time for an interrogation.
『••♡••』
So, back to present time!
You sat on the dusty couch while the boys’ all stood in front of you. “So, what do you have to say?”
“Well, first of all, I don’t like that you decided to spy on me. Second of all, if you were really my friends. . . Wouldn’t you just wait for me to say something when I was ready?”
Well that certainly wasn’t what they expected to hear. Suddenly they felt something akin to guilt.
“I was actually going to tell you soon since Riddle seems like he wants to take this relationship seriously but guess I don’t need to do that now.” You couldn’t help but sigh before standing up and flicking Ace’s forehead. “Ow! You–. . .Y’know what, I deserved that.” He couldn’t even argue with you on that one.
“Nonetheless, you guys are my friends, so as long as you are happy for me in the end then it’s fine,” you spread out your arms, “Group hug?” That crooked yet loveable smile was hard to say no to. No matter how much they tried to act like that didn’t like the hug, you knew that they didn’t actually mind it one bit.
“I just have one condition if you're dating Riddle.”
“That being?”
“If I ever catch the two of you being all sappy or lovey-dovey then I won’t be able to talk to you for the rest of that week.”
“Oh shut it, Ace!”
Hope this was enjoyable cause my writer's block is still being a pain (╥﹏╥)💖💖💖 — 💘 Hallow 💘
#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#riddle rosehearts x reader#twst riddle x reader#💌.pragma#💌.philia#💌.apprentice's prayers
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Wounded Dog, New Tricks
A Follow Up ‘Pavlov’s Dog’
~~
Part 2
~~
I’m sorry this took so long! My life is crazy right now. I'm getting married in two weeks, and there’s still so much more to be done! Thank you so much for waiting patiently for part 2 of ’Pavlov's Dog’ !! As always, thank you to @fuckingbye for the amazing moodboard! (As well as helping to plan both of my weddings, cause I'd be lost without you!) (Also, for being my bridesmaid) (Basically, you’re superwoman and I adore you)
Lets get to it!
Word Count: 36,221 words (it’s me, what do you expect?)
Warnings: SMUT (MINORS DNI! 18+ ONLY), Public Sex, Daddy Kink, Degrading Kink, Angst, Heartbreak, Drinking, Arguing, FLUFF, Swearing, Depression, Anxiety Attack, Violence (only a little), I’m pretty sure that’s everything...
Song(s) That Inspired This Chapter: Just For A Second It All Felt Simple
I do not give consent/permission for my works/stories to be posted elsewhere. I do not condone this type of behavior, this is for entertainment purposes only.
~~
“I don’t get why you’re so mad at me for getting some fucking blankets and cushions,” Ransom scowls as you two enter your new house.
Daisy’s gonna kill you for letting him be the first one to spend any real time with you in your house.
“I don’t-”
“I’m already about to have the most honest and uncomfortable talk I’ve ever had with anyone, I at least wanna be comfortable.”
“And the blankets? It’s practically Summer.”
“Think of it as a housewarming present.”
“Who says I want one from you?”
“Y/N,” he growls and you roll your eyes.
“You don’t get to be fucking annoyed with me for a while,” you snap as you take your wine bottles out of the shopping bag, along with wine glasses and a bottle opener.
You made him stop at the liquor store before heading over to sign the papers. You knew it wasn’t in your best interest to have this particular conversation with him while drinking, but it’s not something you can handle 100% sober. Ransom got his own bottle of bourbon, then he stopped at Bed, Bath, and Beyond to get drinking glasses and minimal furniture (blankets, towels, sofa and pillow cushions, and a comforter). You protested, but he told you to be quiet while he took out his card and paid for everything.
You didn’t speak to him for the entire ride to your new house.
“We’re not gonna get anywhere if you’re gonna be a bitch this entire time,” he mutters as he pours himself a glass a tall glass of bourbon.
“Then you can fucking leave right now.”
“Jesus, I know you hate me and have every right to, but can you just try to be patient with me?!” he questions, clearly frustrated and you know he has a point.
You let out a sigh before throwing a cushion on the floor and sitting down, “you’re right and I’m sorry. I agreed to this and I should at least be agreeable.”
“I’m sure you’re gonna yell at me, but if you...I know I don’t deserve any grace and patience from you, but if you could just...let me get it out before you decide you hate me forever, I’d appreciate it.”
“That’s fair,” you shrug before taking a sip of your wine. “Start from the beginning.”
“From the beginning,” he scoffs before taking a long drink from his glass, “as if you don’t know.”
“I don’t know-”
“Jesus Y/N, you know you do. Everything I said wasn’t a lie and you know good and damn well what parts I’m talking about, but if you want to start from the incident with Tommy, we can. I wasn’t expecting you to stick up for me, but you did and that’s honestly what set all of this in motion. Since the first time I laid eyes on you, I was in love with you, and from that moment...I couldn’t get you out of my head. Yeah, you broke the fucking rules because you spoke to me first-”
“What fucking rule is that?!”
“Oh c’mon! We were kids! What the fuck was I supposed to tell you?! I didn’t fucking talk to anyone, and here you were asking me if I was okay! We stared at each other all the damn time, but both of us was too shy to say anything, and then you-”
“You needed a friend!”
“I wasn’t ready for you!” he defends before taking a deep breath and then a sip of his drink. “I just...no one ever defended me. Not even in my own fucking family. I didn’t know what to say, so I just ran, and I kept running. You were so fucking nice, all the time, and what the hell was I supposed to do with that? You were like some mythical fucking...anyway, I-”
“No, if we’re gonna talk about this, you’re gonna-”
“Y/N-”
“Then go home, Ransom. I didn’t do this to us, you did!”
He takes a deep breath before finishing off his drink and pouring himself another, “by the time we were in the 3rd grade, I knew I’d never be enough. You just seemed like an impossible dream. If anything, I thought I’d lost out when I saw you and Daisy becoming so fucking close, because how much room can you have for fucked up people? As time went on, I never thought you’d go for me, and I knew I wasn’t ready for you, so I just fucking stayed away. What else was I supposed to do? You never spoke to anyone unless you had to, and I didn’t even know what to say to you, so I just said nothing. I didn’t acknowledge you, I didn’t go to your birthday parties, and I sure as shit didn’t go to your graduation party...I always thought I had time to get my shit together. Then Jack came along and fucked everything up.”
“Good old Jack,” you scoff, finishing off your drink and pouring yourself another.
“He just...I knew the bet was stupid when I made it, okay? He was so fucking arrogant about it though, and it was only because he figured out I had a thing for you. I thought you’d say no, cause you’re too smart for that shit, but Jack’s a good fucking liar. He gets it from his fucking dad. I honestly didn’t care about losing the fucking money, I cared more about you staying with him, and that’s exactly what fucking happened. What’s fucking worse is that he genuinely did start to care about you. Yes, the smug son of a bitch loved to rub it in my face, but he wasn’t bullshitting you entirely. He did try. He tried to not cheat, he tried to actually be presentable...he tried, and that only made you fall harder. That piece of shit only asked me to be his best man to be a prick, but pride wouldn’t let me turn it down. I wanted to fucking say something. When the fucking priest asked if anyone objected, I wanted to scream, but you were so fucking happy. You were so happy and you looked gorgeous, so I said nothing, because if there’s anyone who deserved to be happy, it’s you. My pride and my bullshit didn’t matter, so I just didn’t fucking say anything and I got fucked up,” he sighs before downing his drink and quickly pouring himself another, while you just sat there and dried your eyes while taking a long drink from your glass.
“Then he started cheating. Only took the little fuck three months, but he was still faking like he was the man you fell in love with. At first, he felt bad and he would tell me about how he wants to be better, but the more he got away with it, the less he started to care. Then, you left and that almost scared him straight. However, the fact that your precious parents bullied you into going back...it only made him more arrogant. Then he started with the fucking bragging and it pissed me the fuck off. How could he not understand how fucking good he had it? You’re the only person in this whole fucked up world we live in that’s actually worth a damn. I would pick arguments that were dumb as hell, just to have a way to yell at him for treating you like shit. That’s when the prick got cocky. He kept saying that he could do whatever the fuck he wants, because there’s no way you’d ever leave him. We were out one night, and he’d just gotten back from getting a blowjob from some whore, when he told me that I couldn’t even get you.
So, that’s when the second bet happened. I know, okay? Don’t fucking give me that look,” he scowls as you glower at him while taking a drink from your glass, almost finishing it. “It’s not lost on either of us that I’m a fucking asshole, so you can’t really be all that surprised that I took the fucking bet. I figured I could get you and the money, and everything would be fine. For as long as I’ve wanted you, needed you, and loved you, I knew it wouldn’t be hard for me to win your love. Yes, I left out the bet, but I didn’t fucking lie to you. Everything I said was true. My feelings weren’t fake. We’ve had a lot of talks about a lot of things that make me look like a pile of shit, and I was honest about all of it. I swear I was gonna tell you everything after your birthday party, and I knew I’d have hell to pay, but it was going to be okay. You loved me, I loved you, you could finally see that it was genuine, then fucking Jack...piece of shit knew what he was doing. Beside the fact that he knew he was losing you, he fucking called while we were in Chicago. Technically, I broke the rules of the bet-”
“Oh, you two had rules? That’s cute,” you laugh humorlessly as you refill your glass. “What were your rules about fucking me over?”
“Sweetheart-”
“What the fuck were they, Ransom?!”
He takes a deep breath before pouring his own drink and looking away from you, “I wasn’t supposed to wine and dine you, it was supposed to be purely sex-”
“Because you guys needed to see how much of a whore I am, or if I’m one at all.”
“Baby, that’s not-”
“What were the rest?” you mutter, sipping your wine.
“I couldn’t tell you that I love you,” he sighs, “I obviously couldn’t tell you about the bet, and I couldn’t tell you about tell you about all of the shady shit Jack was doing behind your back.”
“Of course.”
“Oh, come on! I at least I told you about all the shit he was doing-”
“SO YOU COULD GET YOUR $40,000!”
“That’s not...I love you. I have always loved you. Even without the fucking bet, I would’ve told you. I didn’t say anything at that fucking wedding because he had cleaned up his act. I just wanted you to be happy, and you’re right, we are all a group of shitheads. The money shouldn’t have been brought into this, but you’re not just another Marta to me. You are the only person in this world that I want to do right by. You think I would’ve gone to that fucking bar and beat the shit out of Jack if this was all a fucking game to me?”
He had you there. Ransom never stuck his neck out for anyone unless it was for his own personal gain. He knew how much you didn’t want him to fight Jack, and did it anyway, knowing it could all blow up in his face.
“I don’t know what you want from me, Ransom. I really don’t.”
“I want, I need us to go back to how we were!”
“That’s not fucking happening!” you laugh before taking a sip of your wine. “Nothing can ever be how it was!”
“Why not?! I’ve been honest-”
“You still fucking lied to me, Ransom! You lied and had no problem-”
“It’s not that I didn’t have a problem-”
“You decided that the money was more important than telling me-”
“Cause fuck Jack!”
“UGH!” you scream, getting up and walking out of the room, full wine glass in hand.
“Where the fuck are you going?!”
“I don’t know! I don’t feel like looking at your stupid face anymore!”
Stupid face? Yeah, you’re buzzed.
“Stop it, Y/N,” he growls, following after you as you storm into the kitchen.
“Stop what, exactly?! You’re not in my position!”
“I love you!”
“What does that mean to me?! At the end of the day, even if I do believe you, you went after me over a fucking bet!”
“I told you that I’m sorry!”
“That doesn’t make it hurt any less! You’ve probably been fucking your feelings away-”
“No I haven’t!”
“Bullshit!”
“You think I’m gonna lie to you about that?! I’ve become a fucking laughing stock, Y/N! I used to fuck whoever, whenever, and now I’m just waiting for you like a fucking idiot!”
“I don’t know why you’re waiting for me, because-”
“Because I love you, I love you, I LOVE YOU!” he shouts and let out an exasperated sigh before taking a sip of wine and running your other hand through your hair.
“You used me like a fucking toy, Ransom. I was a bet in some stupid game for revenge.”
“I’m sorry, I am. I’ll never fucking-”
“Even if you don’t do it again, how am I supposed to trust you? How am I supposed to know that you aren’t keeping things from me?”
“Because I love you.”
“You keep saying that like it means something to me!”
“It means something to me! Do you know how many times I’ve told a woman that I fucking love her?! NONE! Jesus, I didn’t take the fucking money, I’ve been texting and calling you every day for the last month-”
“I DIDN’T FUCKING LIE TO YOU!” you scream at him, finally letting the tears you’ve been holding back fall. “I miss you, Ransom. I miss you so much and it hurts because you...God, I fucking trusted you against my better judgement and you painfully showed me that I was wrong! You knew all of the shit that I was going through with Jack, and you still did this! For as much as you love me, it wasn’t enough for you to be upfront with me! You broke all of the fucking rules except telling me that it was a fucking bet, because you wanted the fucking money!”
“Y/N-”
“And now you’re standing here, as if I’m the one being unreasonable, while I’m trying to figure out all of this shit! I love you so damn much and I don’t want to! I don’t want to think about you every day and miss you every night! I don’t want you to be on my mind all the damn time! That doesn’t change the fact that I do! I want nothing more than to believe everything you’re saying and take you back, but it’s not that fucking simple! All of this is so fucking complicated...you two did this! You two decided that it would be more fun to play games and bet money-”
“It wasn’t a game!”
“That’s exactly what it was! You made a bet to see if I would stay with my husband or if you could win my affection! It was a game!”
“It wasn’t a game to me! I have always loved you!”
“But the love you felt wasn’t enough for you not to hurt me like this,” you sob.
“Y/N, I will do anything you want. Anything. You can have the passwords to all my devices, you can randomly come by my house or my job-”
“It’s not enough, Ransom.”
“Then what is?!”
“I don’t know,” you answer softly, trying to fight back more tears. “I don’t know if anything will be-”
“No, don’t say that. I know I fucked up, and it was a major fuck up, but I swear you’re not a fucking joke to me! I know I lied and it was for all the wrong reasons, but that’s the only thing I lied about! I love you!”
“I love you too, Ransom,” you sigh before finishing off your wine. “I honestly don’t know what to tell you, because I just don’t know. I know...I know that you care, and I believe you when you tell me that you love me...but Ransom, you keep saying that you only lied once, but that lie is the only reason you pursued me! A $40,000 bet is the only reason you finally started talking to me! After knowing me for years! And yeah okay, fuck Jack, but what about me? You could’ve told me earlier, and while you definitely would’ve had to work much harder, I wouldn’t have walked away. Now-”
“I can work harder now!”
“The damage is already done, Ransom.”
“I need you, Y/N. I’ve never felt this way about anyone and I know I never will again. I promise to never fuck up like this again, but please...” he trails off, his voice breaking as he fights off his own tears. “I didn’t take the fucking money, Y/N.”
“I just need time, Ransom.”
“How much?”
“I don’t know. After all that’s happened...I just don’t know. I love you and I miss you. God, I miss you so much, but this isn’t something I can just forgive because you’re sorry and you miss me. After Jack and all of the shit with my parents...I need time. I need to be alone for a while. I’m not saying that there’s not any hope for us, but right now...Ransom, if you want us to have any sort of chance, you have to give me time.”
“With time, will you take me back?”
You stay silent and he lets out a frustrated sigh.
“Yeah fine, lets get you back-”
“We’re not going anywhere,” you mumble, making your way back to the living area.
“What do you-”
“I’ve gone through almost an entire bottle of wine and you’ve had at least 4 or 5 glasses of bourbon. Neither of us are in any condition to drive.”
“You don’t expect us to stay here?! There’s no fucking-”
“Ransom, bitch about the furniture one more fucking time and we’re gonna have a problem.”
“If you expect us to spend the rest of the fucking day here, I’m ordering some fucking furniture.”
“I don’t need you buying me fucking furniture! It won’t even be here today!”
“I don’t fucking care!” he yells, sitting on the floor, pouring himself another glass of bourbon, and taking out his phone.
It’s funny how easy you fall back into habit.
After two more glasses of wine, you’re cuddling up to him and telling him what furniture what you want. You two go back and forth about what would look good for the house but, in the end, you win because it’s your fucking house.
In the end, in all his spoiled rich boy glory, he’s able to get a bed (along with a bed frame), bed sheets, two sofas, and a few lawn chairs, and four TV’s delivered same day. All because he was told ‘no’, Ransom makes the bed frame people assemble the damn thing, and you feel bad. Ransom protests when you tip them, but you told him that it’s your house, so you’re the one calling all of the shots. For as much of a dick as he can be, all of the furniture to come (and that was delivered), is paid for by him.
There he goes, sweeping you off your feet again.
“We need food and chargers,” he mumbles, wrapping an arm around your waist.
“Would it really be so bad if our phones died? Would it be so terrible if we just ignored everyone for a while?” you sigh with a slur as you relax into him.
“What’s wrong, baby?”
“I just hate everyone. With the exception of Daisy, everyone has been pissing me the fuck off. You know she had to destroy Jack’s car so he would finally sign the fucking papers?”
“That was her?!” Ransom laughs.
“That’s what he gets for showing up and yelling for me to talk to him.”
“Fuck him,” Ransom scowls before placing a soft kiss on your exposed shoulder.
You clear your throat before asking, “what do you want to eat?”
“What are you in the mood for?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well, I’m not choosing. Whenever I’m in charge of dinner, you want to argue-”
“I don’t fucking argue with you, Ransom. You just have shitty taste when it comes to certain foods.”
“That being said,” he scowls, “what do you wanna eat?”
“I don’t know,” you repeat with a shrug.
“Well, are you having a good day or a bad day?”
“It’s been okay, I guess.”
“Then lets get Gyros.”
“I hate how well you know me sometimes.”
“I know,” he laughs as you take out your phone.
Soon enough, you’re ordering everything from food to basic accessories.
“Why the fuck did you get candles?” Ransom laughs. “Your lights work just fine.”
“Because I wanted to,” you huff, only making him laugh harder.
“And the booze?”
“I’m out of wine and you’re going to be out of bourbon soon. If we’re gonna spend the night together, we’re gonna need the help.”
“Only you need the help.”
“So, you’re fine with us being completely alone together all night?”
“Babe, we could’ve sobered up hours ago. You chose not to.”
“That’s because being sober sucks right now.”
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m sorry that I made it all that much more complicated for you.”
“I fell in love with you. It just is what it is.”
“I never wanted to hurt you. I truly didn’t.”
“I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.”
“I know, but I need you to know that.”
“I do, Ransom. I truly do, but it doesn’t change the fact that you still hurt me.”
“I know that ‘I love you’ doesn’t mean much right now, but I do love you. I will always love you.”
“Ransom-”
“What should be arriving first?” he sighs, his hold on you getting a little tighter as he slightly readjusts his position.
“I honestly have no idea,” you giggle softly. “I ordered everything around the same time. Why?”
“I can set up on of the TVs if you want.”
“Or if you want.”
“Well, what else are we gonna do?”
“We can talk.”
“What do we have to talk about?”
“What have you been up to?”
“Not much.”
“Ransom-”
“I really haven’t, Sweet Thing. I’ve been missing you and that’s about it. There’s not really much else for me to do.”
“There’s the company-”
“That’s-”
He’s interrupted by the doorbell and it almost sounds as if he’s letting out a sigh of relief. He lets go of you before slowly getting up and making his way to the front door.
What the hell is that about?
“Looks like the chargers and bullshit made it here first,” he laughs as he picks up the bags off your doorstep.
“I got you a charger too, ya know.”
“You’re the only one I want to talk to.”
“What about work?”
“What about it?”
“What if they call, Ransom?”
“I’m not worried about it. Where do you want all these damn candles?”
“Ransom-”
“Where do you want them, Sweet Thing?”
“What are you not telling me?”
“Where do you want them?”
“Ransom-”
“Another time. For now, where do you want these damn candles?”
“A few in here and some in the kitchen,” you sigh, pouring yourself another glass of wine.
Great.
“The toilet paper?”
“You don’t have to put everything away-”
“I want to.”
“Let me show you around then,” you mutter, getting up with your wine glass in hand (and wobbling a little), and leading the way.
The entire time you’re showing him around, you can feel his eyes on you intensely, and you know it’s not because he wants to make sure he doesn’t want to lose his way.
“Your ass looks great in those shorts,” he comments once you two reach your bedroom, pointing out the connecting bathroom where he can put the toilet paper.
“I didn’t wear them for you.”
“You also didn’t change for me.”
“It’s not my fault you’re missing out,” you shrug as show him the other two spare rooms.
“I thought you wanted me to be honest with you.”
“Ransom-”
“Have you been fucking anyone else?”
“Why does it matter?”
“You know that I’m not, I just figured we’d both just lay all our cards out on the table. Have you?”
“What if I have?”
“I’ll kill him,” he shrugs as if it’s not a big deal.
“Jesus, Ransom,” you scowl, closing the bathroom door after he puts two packs of toilet paper down.
“You still haven’t answered me,” he pushes as you two make your way back down the stairs.
“No Ransom, I haven’t been sleeping with anyone. I’ve barely gone out. I do my most of my work from home and I watch movies. That’s it,” you sigh as you reach the bottom step and make your way back into the living area.
“I can get a car service and we can go back to my place-”
“Stop it, Ransom.”
“Do you always have to be so hard headed?”
“Ransom...don’t.”
“You and I both want to-”
“It just complicates things that much more. Leave it alone,” you sigh as your phone buzzes. “Fuck.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Our order is gonna be delayed. They’re backed up.”
“Shit!”
“I should’ve ordered snacks.”
“At least you ordered a fuck ton of water.”
“Fuck you! You purchased me a water cooler-”
“That should’ve been here by now,” he scowls.
“You spent too much money on me. It’s not even your house.”
“It’s your house and I want you to have everything you want.”
“I’m not yours to take care of,” you mutter as you resume the spot you were in before.
Ransom says nothing. He just sits across from you and looks at you with those eyes.
You shouldn’t have said it. Ransom has always thought of you as his, so you telling him that you’re not his to worry about? Not good. It also doesn’t help that he’s all you’ve been dreaming of since the last time you saw him.
Mentally, emotionally...physically.
“Let me see your lighter so I can light these candles,” you mumble, trying to fight off those thoughts.
“You’re giving yourself away,” he smirks as he lights the candles.
If he’s gonna be smug about it, fuck him. Yeah, you’ve been drinking, so that’s pushing you to make this horrible decision, but fuck him.
“You like this tank top?” you ask seductively as you place your wine glass down.
“Don’t.”
“Don’t what? It’s a simple question. You’re looking at me like you like it,” you shrug.
“Y/N-”
“My tits look amazing in it. At least, that’s what Daisy’s told me multiple times. Jack even said so too,” you continue as you get on your knees and crawl over to him.
“Don’t-”
“You’re the one who said I’m giving myself away,” you moan as you straddle him. “You don’t think you’ve made what you want obvious since the moment you showed up at Daisy’s door?” you ask as you unbutton his board shorts.
“I just wanted...shit!” he moans as you start stroking him.
“You just wanted what, Ransom?”
“Don’t. Don’t...shit!”
“Don’t what?”
“You know exactly what. You think I won’t pin you down and fuck you senseless?”
“Maybe it’s what I want, Ransom. Maybe it’s what I need,” you moan as you pick up your pace.
“You’re d-drunk,” he stutters and you know he’s close.
“If you want me to stop, I will.”
“You’re-”
“I want you, I know that you want me, and I don’t care that we’ve been drinking. You love me? Show me,” you plead.
“Fuck!” he moans as he cums hard.
“Looks like you made a mess and it’s my fault. Wanna teach me a lesson, daddy?”
Fucking alcohol.
Ransom’s hands are cupping your face instantly and he’s kissing you deeply. You finally feel whole again. No, you don’t want to give him false hope, but you weren’t lying when you told him that you miss him like crazy. You’ve missed his love, his laugh, his voice, his scent, his touch...all of him.
Even the spoiled and arrogant parts of him.
You’ve tried to find substitutions for his touch, but your own fingers and vibrator won’t do the trick, because you need him. His body pressed against yours, his breath against your neck, his voice while he’s fucking you like he’ll never see you again, and his fingers entangled in your hair...
You just need Ransom.
“Ransom,” you moan as he kisses down your body.
“I’ve needed you so much, Sweet Thing,” he husks as he unbuttons your shorts. “Needed you in so many ways!”
“I’ve needed you too, baby. I love you so much,” you whimper, adjusting yourself a little so he can get your shorts off of you.
“You’re wearing panties I got you?” he groans, taking note of the of the sheer light blue panties with little flowers embroidered in them that he purchased for you about two months before your birthday.
“I’m wearing the set,” you moan as you grind yourself against him.
“You’re gonna make me rip my own gift off of you?” he pouts and you laugh as you pull his shirt off.
“Fuck,” you sigh, running your hands across his expansive chest.
“Still like what you see?”
“I love it and I always will.”
“I need to be deep inside of you, sweetheart,” he grunts, ripping your tank top off. “Thought about nothing but you and loving you since the last time I saw you.”
“Take whats yours,” you beg softly.
Once again, you’re not lying. Even though you can’t trust him, you’re still his. You know for a fact that you’ll never love another the way you love Ransom. For all of his flaws, it’s clear that Ransom has always seen you for you. He sacrificed his own happiness because he wanted you to be happy, he’s never asked for more than you’re willing to give, and hes always taken care of you. Whether you just needed to cry, needed to be fucked, needed to be loved, or needed to be heard, he gave that to you without complaint or without wanting anything back in return.
Well, nothing except your love.
In one swift move, hes got you on your back and is ripping your bra off.
God, you missed him so much.
“Baby...please,” you whine as he kisses down your body at a painfully slow pace.
“You need it, sweetheart?” he teases before ripping your flimsy panties off of you.
“I always need it, Ransom. I always need you,” you confess breathlessly.
You barely have time to catch your breath as he buries his face between your legs. He pulls on your clit with his lips while easily sliding two fingers into your soaked cunt.
“Yes!” you cry out, grinding your cunt against his face.
His grunt of satisfaction only makes you even more desperate for him to fill you with his love. The sounds that are coming from between your legs should make you ashamed of yourself, but it’s not like you’re surprised. Ransom gets you excited by just looking at you. Finally having him like this again? You’re surprised you didn’t cum instantly.
“Baby...I’m so...fuck, Ransom! I need...oh God, YES!” you yell out, squirting hard and pulling on his hair a little harder than you meant to.
It’s not like he cares.
“Still so responsive to me,” he chuckles after cleaning up the mess he made. “You want me to fuck you, baby?” he asks before slowly starting to kiss up your body.
“No,” you moan and he stops instantly, “I want you to make love to me.”
“Sweet Thing-”
“I don’t care that nothing is resolved and we don’t know what the fuck is gonna happen tomorrow. I just need you to love me, please.”
“You don’t know how long I’ve waited to hear you say that.”
Ransom continues his little trail up your body, stopping to lick and suck on each of your nipples, which are still covered so you whimper at the torturous pleasure, before his lips are finally on yours again.
“You sure you want this, sweetheart?” he husks as he strokes himself.
“Please, you don’t know how much...please, I need you so much,” you beg, sounding pathetic to your own ears, but you don’t care.
“I love you, Y/N,” he groans as he thrusts himself inside of you. “I love you so fucking much!”
“I just need you, Ransom! Only you!” you cry out as you wrap a leg around his waist, “Shit! You always...FUCK!”
“Feel so good, Sweet Thing!”
“Ransom...I’m so...been so long! You fill me up so...oh my GOD!”
“The way you’re clenching me...you need it, don’t you?”
“Please!” you sob, the pleasure becoming too much for you.
It’d been so long (as far as you’re concerned), you don’t even know how you’ve lasted this long.
“Give it to me, Sweet Thing! Give me all your-”
“FUCK!” you yell, gripping him tight as your orgasm washes over you and you squirt on him, more than likely making a mess on the floor.
You just got this fucking house for fucks sake.
“Jesus Y/N!” he growls into your neck as his own release overtakes him.
As you both lay there and try to catch your breaths, you faintly hear a knock on your door.
“I think our food is here,” you laugh.
“Or the fucking water cooler,” Ransom mumbles and you laugh even harder. “You hungry?”
“Only for you, baby,” you smile at him.
You and Ransom keep at it all night. It’s not lost on either of you that you need to eat, but after being so long without one another, food is the last thing you two are worried about.
“Fuck, keep it up, baby!” Ransom encourages as you continue to ride him.
“So full...Ransom...”
“Just one more time for me, please! Needed you...fuck! So fucking-”
“Ransom...please! I need to...ah ah!”
“Make a mess, pretty baby! Cum for...ah fuck!”
“RANSOM!” you scream as you make a mess all over him.
“That’s my girl!” he groans as he fills you and you collapse on top of him.
“We’re a pair of true fucking idiots,” you murmur as Ransom lets out a full bodied laugh. “I miss you, Ransom.”
“I miss you too, Sweet Thing.”
“I don’t know what the fuck to do...I just know that I want to be with you.”
“I know you can’t right now, but you can trust me. I can be...you are the only person I’ll ever want. The only person I’ll ever need.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, Sweet Thing. We should eat.”
“We should rest,” you laugh as you slowly get off of him, letting out a frustrated sigh when he’s no longer inside of you.
“Maybe I should spend the night inside that perfect little cunt,” he offers as you lay beside him.
“Fuck off,” you giggle while he gets up. “Where are you going?”
“Looks like buying those blankets was a good idea,” he chuckles, walking away and now it’s your turn to let out a full bodied laugh.
In the back of your mind, you know this is all drunken temporary fun, but for now you really don’t give a shit. Hell, you’ll take all the blame. You were the one that told him to come here, you got drunk knowing how you get around Ransom, you gave him the fucking handjob, and you begged him. When you get the third degree from Daisy tomorrow, you’re going to own up to everything.
No, this doesn’t fix everything and he knows that, but for now you feel better. You can pretend for now you’re in a house you own together, all of the shit that happened on your birthday didn’t, and that you both haven’t been hurting. For now, everything is perfect and as it should be.
“Ya know,” Ransom starts as he makes his way back in, “there is a bed upstairs.”
“Shut up and get your ass down here,” you giggle.
With an annoyed sigh, he does as he’s told, “so fucking bossy.”
“Says the man who bullied the store into having a bed and bed frame delivered and assembled today.”
“They shouldn’t have told me no,” he shrugs as he throws the comforter over the both of you.
“Spoiled little shit.”
“That you love.”
“Unfortunately so,” you sigh as you take the two water bottles he hands you, then resting your head on his chest.
So this is what it feels like to finally be home? It’s amazing.
“Sweetheart?” he calls softly as you start to drift off.
“Hmm?”
“Thanks for tonight. I missed you.”
“I love you, Ransom.”
“I love you,” he tells you softly before wrapping an arm around you and pressing a soft kiss into your hair. “Get some rest.”
Yeah, all of this is temporary, but for now? For now, it’s good enough.
**
Ransom’s P.O.V
“Don’t you have a fucking wife?” I slurred as Jack made his way over to the bar, smug fucking grin as he adjusted his pants.
The red head that followed behind him out of the bathroom subtly wiped around her mouth, before walking right past him.
“The same woman every night gets boring,” he laughed as he waived the bartender over, “whiskey on the rocks. What?” he questioned as he turned his attention back towards me. “Are you jealous that she’s all mine? That she’ll never leave me?”
“She’ll fucking leave you.”
“With the way her parents want to make sure their perfect daughter stays perfect, I know she’s not going anywhere.”
“Yeah, okay,” I scoffed.
“You couldn’t even take her from me.”
“Watch it, jackass.”
“Oh, did I hurt your feelings?” he laughed, taking a sip of his drink and looking me over.
“Jack, you won a bet, then married her, and now you treat her like shit. It’s not my fucking feelings you need to be worried about.”
“It fucking burns you that, for once, you’re not getting everything you want, huh?”
“She’s not a fucking piece of meat, Jack.”
“God, you really do love her, don’t you? I’ll make a wager with you,” he offered with a laugh. “You can try and take her from me.”
“What the fuck?”
“You heard me, try and win her from me. You and your cock seem to rule Massachusetts, so go ahead and try.”
It’s not like I can blame my actions on me being fucked up. I’m a prideful and arrogant piece of shit, and my ego already took a blow when I had to watch that fuck marry you. Of course I took the fucking bait.
“What do you want if you win?” I asked against my better judgement.
“$40,000.”
“Fuck you!”
“What? You don’t think you can do it?”
“It’s not that-”
“You think she’s worth more? Of course you do,” he laughed.
He fucking laughed. It’s amazing that I didn’t snap him in half in that moment. However, $40,000 and you? That wasn’t a bad deal at all.
“What’s the deadline?”
“Her 30th birthday.”
“Fine.”
“Aht, aht, aht,” he taunted, “they’re rules.”
“If you’re so sure she’ll stay with you, why are there rules?”
“Cause I’m not as stupid as you’d like me to be, Drysdale,” he chuckled. “You can’t tell her that you’re in love with her, you obviously can’t tell her that this a fucking bet, the shit I do behind her back doesn’t get back to her, and none of your fancy bullshit.”
“What fuck does that mean?”
“You can’t treat her to fancy restaurants, no fucking trips, no expensive shows...all the bullshit you usually pull. You get to fuck her, if she allows it which we both know she won’t, and a few sweet texts here and there, but none of the shit you pulled with Marta.”
“That’s not a fair fucking playing field.”
“That’s the bet, take it or leave it,” he smirked.
Why the fuck did I have to take it? Why do I have to be so fucking prideful and egotistical all the fucking time? What was the point?
I didn’t break the rules for the $40,000. I broke the rules because I’ve always been in love with you. I’ve always wanted to take care of you, always wanted to take you on trips, always wanted to bury myself in that sweet little honeypot of yours...
I’ve always wanted you.
The $40,000 wasn’t a big deal. What is it to me? That’s just a bad night at the poker table. I should’ve never taken the damn bet, but fuck all if I can’t ever stop being a piece of shit.
Now, you’re here in my arms and snoring softly, but it’s all just temporary, isn’t it? You’re chasing the same kind of peace and happiness that I am, but you didn’t do this. I did. You’ll wake up in the morning and I’ll drop you off, and then you have a choice to make. I already know that I’ll react in the worst way if you don’t choose me, which I know you’re also already aware of. You and I both know I’m a spoiled little shit, so it’s not like you’ll be surprised.
It’s not lost on me that you have every right to walk away from me, but that doesn’t mean I can fucking handle it. A small mistake, I guess two small mistakes, could lose me everything I’ve ever wanted.
Two stupid small mistakes could cost me everything; could cost me you.
“Ransom?” you call out softly in your sleep.
“I’m here, Sweet Thing.”
“Don’t...don’t go,” you beg softly, your hold on me getting stronger as you cuddle into me more.
How the fuck am I suppose to sleep without you now?
“Just rest, baby.”
“I love you,” you mumble sleepily.
“I love you with all my heart.”
“Promise me you’ll stay,” you beg.
“I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”
I feel you relax against me and I know you’re back to your original sleep.
You are my entire world; you always have been. From the first time I laid eyes on you, I knew I wanted to be with you and only you. Yeah, I’ve done a lot of shit wrong, but you? If you only knew just how long I’ve been waiting for you. The bet? That was just pride and ego, but it meant nothing. I just need you to give me another chance so I can show you.
Now, I just need to find a way to get you to believe that. I need to find a way to keep you in my arms forever.
**
Y/N’s P.O.V
You giggle at the sensation between your legs as you moan, “Ransom.”
“So fucking hungry , sweetheart,” he moans before licking your clit, “you feed me so fucking well,” he sighs before sliding two into your soaked cunt. “You want me to eat breakfast, right?” he asks before licking your clit teasingly, again.
“Fuck! Ransom!” you moan as you grip his hair tight.
The smirk you feel on your lips has you grinding your cunt against him, which is all the encouragement he needs to keep going.
He curls his fingers and they find that spot within you that always makes you so fucking pathetic for him, and you aren’t ashamed at all.
Last night, you could blame it all on alcohol. Today? Well, today it’s just pure need, want, and desire.
“So fucking close, baby!” you whine as he picks up his pace.
As silly as it sounds, hearing just how much he enjoys your pussy is all it takes.
“FUCK!” you scream as you coat his face and the floor with your release.
Thank God this is your fucking house.
“You want me to order breakfast?” he questions with a sly smirk after he cleans up the pool between your legs.
“Not before you love me again,” you whimper.
“There’s a bed that needs to be broken in,” he claims as he stands up straight, his cock hard, proud, and leaking with pre-cum, “don’t you think it’s time we took care of that?” he questions as he pulls you up before throwing you over his shoulder.
“Ransom!” you laugh as he starts on his way up the stairs.
“Gonna christen this whole fucking house today,” he promises as you laugh harder.
Yes, now you’re sober, so you should be able to make better choices, but it’s bullshit. Making better choices is lost on you at the moment because Ransom is all hat matters to you, and right now, he’s making you feel everything all at once.
“Need you so much Ransom,” you whimper as he lays you on the bed.
“Still the best tasting pussy ever, Sweet Thing,” he praises as he cages you between his arms. “You’re just the most precious little thing,” he coos.
“Need you, daddy,” you moan as you grip his shoulders.
“Didn’t get enough last night? Thought I did such a good job since you made such a mess everywhere,” he chuckles as he easily slides himself inside of you.
“Shit!”
“You’re such a desperate little thing, baby! Such a sweet little thing for daddy!”
“Still the best pussy you’ve ever had, daddy?”
“Always, sweet girl. Only ever want you! Jesus, the way these tits fucking bounce!”
“So close, daddy! Need to fucking...ahh shit!”
“Cum for me, sweet girl! I want it so fucking bad!”
“Fuck!” you yell as you make a mess that causes him to spill into you until it’s seeping out of you.
So much for having a clean bed.
“We really are a pair of morons,” he breathes after a moment and you burst out laughing. “We definitely need to eat. We need to order something.”
“Mhm,” you agree with a small giggle as you wrap your arms around his neck. “Our phones are downstairs.”
“We should go and get them,” he smirks, dipping down and kissing and sucking on your neck.
“We really should,” you moan, grinding your hips against his.
“How about after we make sure you really like this bed?” he grunts, starting to move within you again.
“Might take a few more times, daddy,” you moan, running your fingers through his hair.
“Nothing’s too much for my sweet girl.”
**
“You shouldn’t still be here,” you mumble as you hop up on the counter, your breakfast sandwich in hand.
“Stop keeping me here,” Ransom smirks, leaning against your kitchen island, before taking a bite of his breakfast burrito.
“You’re a very hard drug to quit.”
“You’re the only woman I’ve ever been in love with, how do you think I feel?”
“Why is this so complicated?”
“Cause I fucked up.”
“Lets spend a few months apart-”
“No, that’s not gonna fucking happen.”
“Ransom-”
“I already spent a month without you and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Now, after last night and this morning, you want me to spend a few more months without you? That’s bullshit and you know it.”
“I know last night was my fault, and I’m the one who extended this morning, and I’m sorry. I just missed you so much and I was upset...this morning...it just felt good to pretend. Pretend that none of this hurts as much as it actually does.”
“Lets just take this step by step-”
“Ransom, this isn’t that simple. I obviously am weak when it comes to you and I miss you, but when the fog clears and reality hits, it all still hurts. Taking away the complete fact that this all happened during my birthday party, you chose the money-”
“I didn’t take it!”
“You still took the bet, Ransom. Yeah fine, maybe your intentions changed after, but in the beginning, the money was enough to get you to say yes-”
“Okay, just hear me out. I...I was mad, Y/N. He was being such a piece of shit after getting that fucking blowjob...it was wrong, okay? You have always been my top my priority and you always will be my top priority. The first bet was out pure stupidity and the second one...God, you don’t know how fucking angry I was. I wanted you, I wanted revenge, I wanted to fuck him over...the thought of smashing his head against a fucking wall has crossed my mind more than you think.”
“Ransom, I’m the one who got hurt in all of this. Jack beat the shit out of me, he abused my love just because he could, he cheated and lied...you know all of the shit he did, and you still hid it from me-”
“I was gonna tell you everything that night!”
“You should’ve told me before!” you snap as someone knocks on your door.
Rather hard too.
“It’s your house,” Ransom shrugs as he looks at you.
You flip him off before hoping off the counter, quickly making your way into the living area and pulling the comforter around you (as the knocking comes harder and faster) then finally making your way to the front door.
“Ransom! Open the fucking...oh,” Marta stops short when she sees that you’re the one opening the door.
“Hey...” you trail off, not knowing exactly what the hell to say, cause she’s the last person you ever expected to see at your doorstep. “Um, how did you know...?”
“His car...it wasn’t in the driveway and he never answered. Everyone knows you moved, so I figured this was the next best bet.”
“So everyone knows I live here? That’s fucking great,” you mutter as you hear Ransom walk into the living area. You know he’s naked, and the fact that Marta’s eyes follow him let you know that she knows what you two were up to.
It also doesn’t help that you’re wrapped in a fucking comforter, instead of wearing actual clothes.
“How can I help you?”
“I uh...I need to speak to-”
“What the fuck do you want, Marta?” Ransom growls as he comes up behind you.
“Ransom,” you snap.
“She has no right to be here.”
“Then maybe you should answer your phone!” she bites at him. “Would you mind giving us a moment?” she asks you with a kind smile.
“Of course,” you nod at her, standing to the side so Ransom can get in front of you.
You’re thankful that he put his boxer briefs on.
“What do you want?” he snaps, his tone annoyed and menacing.
“Ransom, don’t be an asshole,” you scowl.
“Yeah fine. Go put on my shirt or something, okay babe?”
“Don’t be cruel,” you tell him softly.
You know that he can pick up on what you mean, because he turns to face you.
“Y/N-”
“Ransom, don’t be a dick.”
“Fine,” he sighs before turning his attention back towards her.
“I’ll be in the kitchen if anyone needs me,” you nod towards Marta before quickly making yourself scarce.
You grab his shirt out of the living area, quickly putting it on, before scampering off towards the kitchen.
“What the hell is going on with the publishing company?!” you hear her yell, on your way back.
“It’s mine to worry about, so don’t-”
“Ransom, you told me-”
“Marta, stay out of it!”
You quickly resume your spot on the counter top and try to mind your own business. It’s not like it’s hard, because you feel like a pile of shit.
For Marta to see you like that and knowing the Ransom was there...you obviously didn’t mean to hurt her, you didn’t even know it was her until you answered the door, but still. She had actually fallen for Ransom and it was all just a joke to him.
It was all for sport.
Yeah, what he did to you was fucked up, but what he did to Marta? It’s not like you haven’t asked yourself a million times, but how can you be so deeply in love with someone like that? Someone so ruthless and selfish...how is he the one you’ve fallen so hard for?
It’s a dumb question though, isn’t it?
Ransom protects you, he loves you, he cares about you, he commits to you...you’re in love with Ransom, because for as shitty as he can be, he makes you the center of his universe.
“Sorry about that,” he mumbles as he makes his way back into the kitchen, clearly annoyed.
“What’s going on with the company?”
“I don’t want to-”
“No, you dodged it last night, you’re not dodging it today. What happened?”
“It’s been a rough month,” he shrugs.
“Ransom.”
“I slacked off. Got depressed, didn’t do things I knew I should’ve been doing...I stopped doing my job.”
“Ransom, this is your baby now! You can’t just-”
“I did all of it for you! Without you, it all just felt pretty fucking stupid. So, for the last two weeks...I’ve been toying with the idea of just giving it to Walt.”
“RANSOM!”
“Stop it, okay? Just stop. I know, why do you think Marta just chewed me the fuck out? I’m fucking up.”
“You can’t just do things like-”
“I miss you. This isn’t something to fucking guilt trip you, it’s me being honest. You left and everything just went to shit. I obviously know it’s my fault, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t feel fucking empty without you. The second you left, none of it mattered to me anymore. So yes, once again, I fucked up,” he sighs.
You hop off the counter and make your way over to him, before wrapping your arms around his waist, “you can’t do this.”
“Don’t.”
“Ransom, whatever happens between us, you’ve done good for yourself. You-”
“It was all for you, Y/N. All of it. All of it was done so that I could be good enough for you. Without you, it’s all worthless. There’s no future to set up, there’s no need to be at least slightly personable, there’s no need for any of it. I want to be someone who’s worthy of being seeing with you, I don’t wanna be just some piece of shit asshole that lives off his wife. I want you to feel secure and know that I’ll always take care of you...I wanted to do...be better for you. Without you around, I don’t give a fuck about any of it,” he finishes softly, looking down at his hands.
And that’s why you’re so in love with him.
Without giving it a second thought, you’re pulling him close and kissing him deeply.
No, it’s not lost on you that you’re the problem right now.
He grips your thighs and hoists you up, and you instinctively wrap your legs around him, as you deepen the kiss.
“We have to stop,” you breathe as he sets you on top of the counter and starts trailing kisses down your neck.
“Why? Why can’t we just pick up where we left off?” he asks breathlessly once he finally meets your gaze.
“We have to set boundaries...we can’t...this doesn’t help anything. Sex doesn’t make everything better-”
“It’s not fucking sex, Y/N. It’s intimacy, it’s love, and it’s home. I can fuck whoever the fuck I want, whenever I want. That’s not the issue here. I only want you. I only desire you. I love you. I’ll only ever want you, Y/N. This has always been so much more than sex to me. You know me well enough to know that this isn’t just a reason to fuck you,” he broods.
God, why can’t you just ever make the smart choice for once?
You and Ransom spend the next few hours in your bed making love, arguing, talking, and just holding one another. It’s everything you want, it’s nothing you want, and it grips your heart. It grips your heart because, with anyone else, this situation would’ve been dealt with.
But with Ransom?
God, he’s your whole world. There’s honestly nothing you wouldn’t do for him, and you know he loves you, but it’s not enough. Right now, it’s just not enough. You trusted him once and it backfired on you so bad, so how the fuck are you supposed to trust him now? Yes, you know he loves you and he wants an honest future with you, but you also know what the hell he’s capable of.
For as easy as you’d like it be, it’s all that much harder.
“How about this?” you sigh, sitting up and facing Ransom, “we still talk, but we don’t see each other?”
“Nope.”
“Ransom, I told you last night that I need time.”
“Okay, but then we made love all night and all day today. I think that shows that you need me just as much as I need you.”
“Its never been lost on either of us just how desperate I am for you,” you scowl with an eye roll.
“I’m sorry, Y/N. I really am, please...lets just start over.”
“You know it’s not that easy, babe.”
“Have I ever told you how fucking annoying it is to be with someone who won’t do exactly what you say?”
“You’ve mentioned it a time or two,” you chuckle softly.
“You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen,” he smiles softly, caressing the side of your face.
“I want to be with you, Ransom,” you tell him truthfully, your eyes watering a little. “I really do, I just...I’m sorry about last night and this morning-”
“I’m not.”
“I’m not saying that I’m sorry it happened, I’m saying sorry if I gave you false hope, because I still don’t know. I love you more than I can ever explain, but it still hurts, Ransom.”
He’s quiet for a moment before responding with, “you’re my whole world, Y/N. You tell me to wait? I’ll wait. You want to explore other options? I’ll suck it up and deal with it. You need space? I’ll give it to you. I thought about this until I fell asleep, and I don’t have any right to demand anything from you. You chose me, you were more than happy to be with me, and then I fucked it all up. I can’t...I can’t keep telling you that I love you and not showing it,” he sighs mournfully.
“I don’t want anyone else, Ransom. Even if this doesn’t work out, I’ll never love anyone the way I love you. Yeah, you can be pretty fucking awful at times, but you also treat me better than anyone else ever has. Maybe that’s a testament to how poorly I’ve been treated my whole life, or maybe it goes to show how great of a person you actually are, but I never truly felt loved until you came along.”
Ransom says nothing. He just pulls you close, cups your face, and kisses you deeply.
His kisses are gonna be the death of you.
“I should get back,” you sigh once you two break apart.
“Another hour?”
“This is already too hard as it is.”
“I love you, Y/N.”
“I love you too, Ransom.”
He lets you keep his shirt since he destroyed yours and promised to send you a new underwear set even though you told him he didn’t have to.
The drive to Daisy’s is quiet, solemn, and Ransom never lets go of your hand. Every time you look over to him, you can see just how broken up he is over all of this, and it only makes your heart hurt more.
It’s not like you don’t understand where Ransom’s coming from, fuck Jack and get the woman hes always loved all in one shot, great plan.
Except for the part he fucked you over.
If he would’ve just told you, it would’ve been fine. No, you definitely wouldn’t have been happy with him, but you two wouldn’t be in the hell you’re in now. Besides the fact that he broke your heart and made you feel like a complete and total fool, everyone is in your fucking business now. When you go out with Daisy, there are stares and whispers, some women look at you with pure disgust while others just give you a side-eye and give you a smirk.
You’re clearly not as pure and perfect as everyone thought you were.
Daisy’s told you that there have been rumors that you’re the one Ransom fucked on his balcony that night, and men (both single and taken) have started feeling way too comfortable approaching you about the things they’d like to do to you. The men at work snicker at you as walk by, which is a big part of the reason you’ve decided to start working from home more, and the rift with your parents is only getting worse.
What are you supposed to do, though? Explain your side of it? Fuck no. It’s not like you even wanted people in your business in the first place, so now you’re supposed to publicly put your business out there? Tell them that your parents pushed you back into something that you tried to get out of? Your ex-husband beat the shit out of you? That he spent all of his free time cheating on you?
Why the fuck is it anyone’s business?
It’s been a fucking shit show since your birthday party and a large part of that is on Ransom. He didn’t take you into account at all (even though he truly believes did), and now you’re the talk of the town. Hell, it’s not like you’d mind all that much if he just told you the fucking truth from the beginning.
“When am I seeing you again?” Ransom asks as he pulls into Daisy’s driveway.
“I don’t know.”
“Will you at least talk to me?”
“Ransom...I’ll text you in a few days. That’s the best answer I can give you right now.”
“If I could take back what I did, I would in an instant.”
“I know you would and I wish that you could, but we don’t live in a world of what we wish we could do. I have to figure all of this out, and as you saw last night and this morning, I can’t do that when you’re around.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m too in love with you,” you scoff. “I can’t think straight when I’m around you. I act on impulse and feelings, and I can’t afford to do that right now. I had every intention of just talking to you and coming back here, but I got sad and drunk, then remembered I was alone with you, and all thoughts of rationality went out the window. I know that I’m the one that initiated last night, but that proves my point. We started and we couldn’t stop. I couldn’t stop. I can’t be around you and make a good choice.”
“Because we’re in love! It was always supposed to be you and me-”
“You didn’t work up the nerve to have an actual conversation with me until-UGH! I’m not having this argument with you again, Ransom. You did something fucked up, and no matter how much I understand it, it still fucking hurts. I always pick people that aren’t good for me, and I need time to figure out what the fuck I’m doing. What I want.”
“You want me.”
“Ransom please!” you sob.
“I love you, Y/N. I love you so much and I fucking swear...none of this means anything to me without you. I’ll never hurt you like that again, I’ll never humiliate you...I will never cause you this much pain ever again,” he promises softly as his own tears start to fall.
You need to do this.
“I’ll text you in a few days, I promise,” you sob softly and he lets out an exasperated sigh.
“Whatever you need,” he responds, looking away from you so you don’t see him cry.
“Ransom, I do love you-”
“You’ve already proven that. Now, it’s my turn to.”
“Let me know when you’re home, so I know you’re safe, please?”
“All of this, and you still wanna make sure I’m safe? God, I really fucked up, didn’t I? The only person to ever actually give a fuck about me and I fucked it up.”
“Ransom-”
“I’ll let you know, babe.”
“I love you.”
“I love you.”
Since he won’t even look at you, you go to leave, but soon he’s grabbing your wrist and you’re turning your attention towards him, and he’s kissing you as if it’s the last time he’ll ever see you. As always, it goes to far and you end up straddling him.
“I have to go,” you moan as he kisses down your neck.
You’re such a sucker for him.
“Just a little bit longer, please.”
“Ransom, I can’t...fuck, no. Ransom, we have to stop.”
“You promise to text me in a few days?” he breathes heavily as he sits back and looks up at you.
“I promise.”
“Y/N,” he sighs as he strokes the side of your face, “I love you...I’ll let you know when I’m home.”
You give him a quick peck on the lips before opening the door on the drivers side and quickly getting out. You give him one last look before quickly making your way up the steps to Daisy’s house.
“That’s definitely not the shirt you left in yesterday,” she scoffs, not even turning her full attention away from the TV.
“I don’t fucking need it right now, Dais. I really fucking don’t,” you sob as you make your way into her kitchen.
“Oh no, what happened?” she sighs, turning off the TV as she gets up to follow you.
“This is on me. I fucked up and...he didn’t do anything wrong,” you try to explain as you grab a wine glass. “God, do you have a cigarette?”
“Babe, what happened?”
“Do you have a fucking cigarette?!”
“Jesus, okay! Just hold on,” she mutters before practically running upstairs.
You don’t mean to snap at her, but your nerves are so shot at this point. You need something.
“Alright, start from the beginning and tell me what happened,” she instructs, coming back into the kitchen and handing you a cigarette before lighting her own.
You really try to get it all out in one shot, but you start crying every 15 fucking minutes, which only makes the whole thing take longer. By the time you finish explaining everything, you’re ready for a nap. Somewhere in the middle of it, you feel your phone buzz, and you know it’s him, which just makes your heart hurt for him even more.
“He was an actual gentleman?” Daisy commented after a moment.
“He’s not a bad guy, Dais.”
“To you,” she scoffs and you roll your eyes.
You know she has a fucking point. Ransom ultimately hates everyone, but (to be fair) everyone hates him. If he isn’t satisfying a woman, she tends to end up hating him. Besides all of the shit he did before, he did just pay for all of the furniture that’s gonna get put in your house.
It’s truly not lost on you just how important you are to him.
“I mean...what do you wanna do?”
“I wanna pretend that my birthday didn’t happen. I want to pretend that I’m not hurt and that I can live in my new home with him, because he is home to me. I want to be with him, but I don’t trust him, Dais, and part of me doesn’t feel as important to him as he says I am.”
“I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but have you really looked at it from Ransom’s point of view? It’s easy to be mad at him, trust me, I wanna break his nose too, but it’s also Ransom. Hes never had a real friend, never been in a real relationship, and his family fucking sucks. You think he understood that not was the worst option?”
“He told me everything else-”
“He told you everything else because, in his eyes, it held value. He’s always loved you, so of course he was gonna tell you. If he truly didn’t care about your happiness, he would’ve said something at your wedding. Yeah, he loses points for not telling you exactly when Jack started cheating again, but at least he told you. It can be easy to say that he did it for his own self interest, but I told you years ago, I saw how he looked at you. That man has truly been in love with you forever. Once he had an even playing ground, he told you. The bet was vulgar and disrespectful, but it’s Ransom. He’s a fucking idiot.”
“So you think I should be with him?”
“I think...I think that it’s hard for me to see you like this. You didn’t tell me about him for a year, which you can still go fuck yourself for, but once you did, it was easy for me to connect the dots. He makes you happier than I’ve ever seen before, and you are so in love with him. You were never this in love with Jack, and I don’t think you ever would’ve been, even if you two would have worked out. You laugh and smile more when you’re with him, it’s clear that he gets and understands you more than anyone else, you threw all your morals out the window and you don’t do that for just anyone, and you love him. You are so painfully in love with him.
This man got his shit together for you, actually started taking things seriously for you, and stopped all his partying bullshit. Even now, when he’s rarely at a club, he’s there just to drink. Whenever a woman even looks his way, he moves to a new spot. You gave him your attention and he changed almost over night. My list of reasons for not liking him, as well as everyone else’s reasons, don’t apply to you. You are the only person Ransom has actually tried to be good enough for, and I know that deep down inside, you believe that.”
“How much did you hate saying all of that?”
“So much more than I’ll ever be able to explain,” she laughs and you laugh along with her. “Also, you getting him to buy all your furniture? Bad ass!”
“I didn’t get him to do anything. He wouldn’t listen to me when I told him not to. He just kept buying things, so I eventually told him what to buy, cause it’s my house and I’ll be dammed if looks Ransom’s vacation home,” you scowl.
“You are right. You need time alone to figure all of this shit out, but I do believe that he actually loves you. If there’s one thing you should take solace in, it’s that he actually loves you.”
“I don’t know. I just need time,” you sigh.
**
It’s been two months since you’ve last seen Ransom, and you’re proud to say that you’ve given into Ransom once.
Well...physically anyway.
It’d been two weeks since you’d last seen him, and you had just received the new lingerie set he’d sent you to replace the one he destroyed that night you two stayed over at your new house. You were already a few glasses of wine in, so you were emotional and vulnerable to say the least. You were alone and didn’t see the harm in that being the only thing you wore around the house. The playlist you randomly selected didn’t do anything to help. Every song was either about heartbreak, true love, fucking your partner senseless, and so on.
All of your thoughts effortlessly went back to him.
To make matters worse, every bit of furniture in the house made you think of, him, since he was the person who purchased all of it. As every second went by, you found yourself missing Ransom more and thinking more and more about that night. All you wanted was to feel his love, his embrace, and him deep inside of you.
By your 6th glass of wine, you’d thrown all caution to the wind.
The voices that were telling you ‘no’ didn’t stand a chance as you got on your bed and took your Scioness sucking and licking clitoral stimulator out. No, that wasn’t anything new, but recording yourself and sending it to Ransom was. You didn’t stop until you soaked the flimsy material and you were in a whimpering and desperate mess.
You barely had to wait all of three minutes before he responded with, ‘you desperate little fucking slut.’
You knew you should’ve turned him away when you opened your door to him, 15 minutes later, but it was useless. Drunk or not, Ransom had been all you thought about from the moment you got out of his car when he dropped you back off at Daisy’s, and you didn’t feel like denying yourself anymore.
“You tell me to leave you alone, but you send me shit like that? You expect me to not act on what we both want?” he husked with a slight slur as kicked your door shut, then pinned you against the wall.
Of course the both of you are drunk.
“I miss you so much, daddy,” you sobbed as he bit and kissed all over your neck.
“Daddy misses you too, Sweet Thing. Ya know, I didn’t even have to jerk myself off to that video. You’re the sexiest fucking little whore! Did you know that, baby? Watching you soak those little fucking panties...came so fucking hard!” he taunted as he gripped your thighs and hoisted you up.
“You did, daddy?” you whimpered as you wrapped your legs around his waist. “Am I still your favorite?”
“I’ll be more than happy to show you just how desperate I am to make you believe that.”
He’d only been in the house the one other time, but he maneuvered up the stairs to your bedroom with ease. His touch was urgent as he ripped off your panties and matching top, but there was also a gentleness to it. As his lips ghosted over your shoulder, his fingers skillfully trailed down your body. Every feeling you’d been craving and needing since the last time you saw him, finally felt satisfied, and he’d barely done anything to you yet.
“You’ve been on my mind since the last time I saw you,” he husked as he sat up and removed his shirt. “Your scent, your kiss, your smile...this perfect fucking cunt,” he smirked devilishly and you whimpered as you ground your hips against his. “Awh, don’t be so fucking desperate, Sweet Thing,” he taunted with a faux pout as he started to tease your clit, “you know how much daddy loves it when you make him work for it.”
“Need you...need you too much,” you sobbed as you worked on the front of his shorts. “I’m yours, Ransom! Please!” you begged, finally able to pull down his shorts.
“Tell me how bad you need me,” he demanded as he slid two fingers inside of you, but it sounded more like he was begging, and you let out a soft gasp. “C’mon, Sweet Thing! Tell daddy how much you need him!’
“Fuck! You’re all I think about...all I dream of...fuck!”
“Tell me more, Sweet Thing!” he demanded pathetically as his thumb started making little circles on your clit.
“Best...best days were spent...oh my GOD! Best days were spent with you!” you mewled as you tried to push him away, feeling way too stimulated. “Ransom...please!”
“I need you, Sweet Thing!”
“Fuck, I need you too! Can’t....can’t think straight...without you! I love you so much!”
“Jesus, give me what I want!” he demanded as he picked up his pace.
You screamed his name as you held on to his arms for dear life, doing your best to focus your attention on him as your orgasm overtook you. He always made you feel so light and happy, and that night was no different. He finger fucked you through your high, a look of pure satisfaction sat on his face as he watched come down, before he finally pulled his fingers out. He teased you by lightly tracing them over lips, but laughed as you whimpered in protest when he quickly took them back and cleaned them off himself.
“Daddy’s so sorry, Sweet Thing,” he groaned as he thrust himself inside of you.
It didn’t matter that you’d had him so many times before, you still weren’t used to the size of him and how he deliciously split you apart.
“Shit!”
“So fucking beautiful when you’re stuffed full of daddy’s fat cock, baby!” he cooed as he fucked into you hard and fast.
“Oh...fuck..!”
“Taking daddy so well, just like always!”
“So...so full! AHT! RIGHT THERE, DADDY!” you screamed as you dug your nails into his biceps. “FEELS SO GOOD WHEN YOU....FUCK!”
He didn’t slow down as he dipped down to kiss you, one had planted firmly by your head, while the other cupped your face as he deepened the kiss. His touch was always so gentle when it came to you, even when the sex wasn’t. Yeah, he loved to treat you like his little rag doll, but it’s always been obvious that he needed you to believe that you’re more than that to him.
Hes always needed you to know that you’re everything to him.
“I need you, Sweet Thing,” he whispered once you two broke apart, his hand traveled from your face to extremely sensitive bundle of nerves and started to tease it.
“SHIT!” you gasped, curling your toes as clenched your eyes shut.
“Eyes on daddy, Sweet Thing,” he pleaded as he started to kneed your clit softly between his fingers.
“OH FUCK!”
“Eyes on daddy, baby! Wanna watch you...FUCK!”
“Daddy...DADDY PLEASE! Too good! TOO MUCH!!” you cried, opening your eyes as you gripped the sheets tight within your fists. “CAN’T!”
“Give it to me, Sweet Thing! Give me everything!”
“FUCK!” you screamed as your legs gripped down on him tight, and you made a mess that covered both his lower abdomen and yourself.
“Can’t get enough,” he husked as he filled you with his love.
You both stilled, no sounds other than your labored breaths, and you knew you should’ve sent him home. You knew that you’d done enough damage, but that did nothing to stop you from saying what what was truly in your heart.
“I need more, daddy,” you breathed as you ran your hands through his sweaty brown tendrils.
“I’ll give you whatever you want,” he promised before he kissed you passionately.
You two stayed up for hours that night. Both of you ignoring the fact it wouldn’t resolve anything, and that you both were feeding into something you shouldn’t. It didn’t help that you both kept telling each other how much you love and needed one another. When all was said and done, he held you close and tight and peppered kisses up and down your neck, begging you to take him back. The best you could respond with was entwining your fingers with his and squeezing tight.
Fucking is a lot easier than forgiving.
When you woke up the next day, he was gone and if it hadn’t been for the ache between your thighs (and in your ass), you would’ve been able to pretend it was all a dream. You wanted to text him and ask him to come over so you could talk, but talk about what? You hadn’t come to a decision, you weren’t sure that you’d forgiven him, and another round of sex wouldn’t do either of you any good.
But you missed him. You missed him so much.
So, when he FaceTimed you that night, you answered. It wasn’t a deep and meaningful conversation, but it helped to kill the loneliness...for the most part. From then on, you two talked on the phone and FaceTimed every other night. Sometimes they ended with heavy breathing and him begging you to let him over, but you didn’t cave. Other times, you stayed on the phone with him until you fell asleep. Sometimes you’d wake up and the call or FaceTime would still be going on, and it made you feel so much less alone.
You keep telling yourself that taking Ransom back isn’t the worst thing in the world, but you also know it’s bullshit. Yes, you do love him, but he hurt you. He lied and decided to keep important information from you, so that he could get his way. You’d given him the benefit of the doubt before and for what? What did you get from it? A broken heart? You second guessing everything you did?
What happens if you trust him again? You already know his parents hate you (mainly Linda because she’s now dealing with another family scandal because of Ransom), your parents hate him, you’ll second guess every word that comes out of his mouth, and you know the stares will be constant. You cheated with Ransom and, according to Daisy, people have pieced everything together. To make the situation worse, Jack is singing his little sad song to anyone who will listen. It doesn’t seem to matter that he cheated first, long before you even started to catch on. Ransom and Jack were supposed to be best friends, and you’re the reason they aren’t anymore.
So many reason to say no and start over, but it’s not enough for you to actually do it.
Obviously, the whole thing wasn’t traditional or romantic, but you were truly happy. Ransom makes you laugh, makes you feel seen and heard, he loves you, you feel safe with him, your heart rate still speeds up at just the thought of him, every part of you yearns for him in the most desperate and pathetic ways, and the only time you don’t feel alone is when he’s by your side.
The man also always sends into the most mind-numbing blissed out state every time you two make love.
It’s all so heartbreaking and confusing, and you wish there was an easy answer, but you know there can’t be. If you take him back, you’ll live in a constant state of anxiety. If you move on without him, you know that no one will ever be able to fill the void that’s in your heart now.
To make matters worse, it’s raining and it’s only making you want Ransom even more. You can’t stop your brain from going back to the last time you two spent a rainy day together, and small sad smile comes to your face.
“Come back to bed,” Ransom whined as you made your way out of the bathroom and back into his bedroom.
“I have to go,” you laughed softly, “I’ve been here all day.”
“So there’s no reason you can’t stay all night.”
“Ransom-”
“Come here,” he demanded gently while a devilish grin tugged on his lips.
You didn’t even think of disobeying him, because your body was always on autopilot when it came to him. You crawled onto the bed and made your way over to him slowly, loving the desire and happiness that burned in his eyes, and didn’t stop until you were straddling him.
“Take your shirt off,” he instructed as his hands ghosted over your bare thighs.
His eyes followed your every move, and it made your heart swell to see him so enamored and obsessed with you. He’d seen you naked a handful of times, but it didn’t seem to phase him. To him, your beauty was something that would always take his breath away.
“Are you happy?” he asked as his hands traveled over your frame. “You seem happy.”
“I’m really happy, baby.”
“I wanna take you away again.”
“Ransom-”
“I miss having you all to myself. I love having you all to myself.”
“I do too, baby.”
“I love you, Y/N.”
“I love you too.”
“Stay. Please just stay with me. We can do whatever you want,” he offered as he wrapped his arms around your waist. “You wanna watch some cartoon? We can do that. You wanna make love for the rest of the day? We can do that too. Eat junk, sit in silence, play board games, literally anything you want. Just stay here.”
“I’m sure you can find someone else to fill your time.”
“You know there’s no one else. There’s only you.”
“Ransom-”
“Sweet Thing, you want to be here, so just be here.”
“I have to go back at some point.”
“No you don’t,” he scowled, “but, if you must, leave tomorrow. Today is the perfect day for us to be together.”
“What do you wanna do?”
“I wanna keep making you happy. I love making you happy,” he smirked as he started to rub your clit.
“Ransom!”
“You wanna watch a movie, baby?”
“I just wanna stay with you!”
“I want you to stay with me forever, Sweet Thing.”
“Oh God! Ransom!”
“So fucking beautiful,” he cooed as he quickened his pace.
“It feels...Ransom! It’s too much!”
“You already know what you have to say to get me to let you cum, Sweet Thing,” he smirked as he easily sunk two fingers into your desperate pussy.
“RANSOM!”
“Tell me you’ll stay,” he begged desperately.
“Pl...please!”
“Not until you tell me that you’ll stay, Sweet Thing.”
“Fuck! I’ll stay! I’ll stay for as long as you want!”
“Careful, Sweet Thing,” he smirked, “you’re gonna end up staying forever.”
“Ransom!”
“Cum for me, sweet angel. You always look so fucking beautiful when you do.”
“Fuck, I love you so much!” you whimpered as you coated his fingers and his wrist. “Such a fucking bully,” you breathed after a moment and he chuckled.
“I only use my magic powers when you’re being stubborn,” he smirked as he pulled you close and kissed you passionately. “What do you wanna do?” he questioned while removing his fingers from your cunt, placing them between both your lips and his.
“Well, right now, I want you to use me up until you’re satisfied,” you whispered before licking his fingers with the tip of your tongue, “then I want us to make lunch and watch movies.”
“All of that is doable,” he promised as he shoved his fingers in your mouth.
You two spent what felt like forever underneath the covers, getting lost in one another, before finally getting out of bed and showering together.
“Ransom, do you ever go grocery shopping?” you laughed, looking in his fridge for anything to make.
“I mean, I send someone to go grocery shopping, but I’ve been slacking,” he admitted as he grabbed two glasses from the cabinet.
“And why is that...babe, these apples should’ve been thrown out weeks ago,” you laughed, taking them out and placing them on the counter.
“If you’re not here, there’s not really much of a reason for me to cook.”
“You can’t just order out all the time, honey. You have to take care of yourself.”
“I just...it doesn’t matter.”
“Talk to me, babe. What’s on your mind?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Why are you shutting me out?”
“I’m not, it’s just...its never mattered before, so why should it matter now?”
“Because I love you and I want to be there for you like you are with me.”
“That’s why you’re still with Jack?”
“Ransom.”
“I’m sorry...really, I am. That was a low blow...it doesn’t matter.”
“Baby,” you sighed, making your way over to him and wrapped your arms around his waist, “let me in. Talk to me.”
“I just don’t see the fucking point,” he scowled, turning his head away from you. “I’m not trying to guilt trip you, but without you, what’s the point? What’s the point of any of this?”
“Ransom-”
“No one cares, except for you. No one checks in, no one calls to see if I’m okay, no one really gives a fuck whether I’m stable or not unless they want something from me, my family always expects the worst of me, because all of us are terrible people...what’s the point? Without you, what is the point?”
“My sweet, sweet love,” you cooed as you cupped his face, “you live for you, not them. It doesn’t matter how they view you, it only matters how you view yourself.”
“We both know I’m not worth saving.”
“I don’t.”
“Y/N-”
“I love you, Ransom. I love you so much that it terrifies me. It’s not lost on me what you’re capable of, but you let me in. You let me see the parts of you that hide from everyone else. The parts that you’re scared of everyone else seeing. Yeah, your family sucks, but you’re not them. You don’t have to keep acting the way they expect you to.”
“I’ll make something of myself and then what? Make them proud? Make myself something else for them to make a profit off of?”
“Like I said before: you live for you, not them.”
“I live for you.”
“You can’t make me your whole world, Ransom.”
“It doesn’t change the fact that you are.”
“What would you do if I do if I didn’t love you?”
“The same shit I’ve been doing,” he laughed humorlessly.
“That’s no way to live, Hugh.”
“Because there’s so much more to live for?”
“Live a life you’re proud of. No matter what your family says or does, no matter what you’ve done in your past, live a life you’re proud of.”
“Are you proud of me?”
“I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t. It’s not about me though, it’s about-”
“Its always been about you, Sweet Thing. From the moment I laid eyes on you...its always been about you.”
“I love you, Ransom.”
“I love you, Y/N,” he smiled before he dipped down to kiss you.
You ended up having groceries delivered to his house, and you both cooked together in a happy silence. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of you as danced around the kitchen in his white collar button down, and were obsessed with every kiss he surprised you with.
You made chicken and rice quesadillas, and ate them while sitting on the kitchen floor with him. Yes, he objected to it, but you were more than happy to remind him that it’s okay to not be prim and proper all the damn time. It’s perfectly fine to let your hair down every once in a while.
“You have to pick a movie,” you laughed before you took a bite of your last quesadilla slice.
“You’re the one who suggested watching a movie!”
“No I didn’t! Plus, you know I hate making the choice!”
“I think you’re the most annoying person I’ve ever met,” he smiled, his ocean blue eyes blossomed in excitement as you burst out laughing.
“Pick a movie!”
“I don’t know! I guess...’Casablanca’.”
“You don’t even like that movie!”
“How about...’The Nightmare Before Christmas’?”
“You hate that movie!”
“But its one of your favorites,” he smiled at you.
“Ransom-”
“I love what you love.”
“Does the mean you’re finally gonna love yourself?”
“Don’t be annoying,” he warned with a glare.
“Love yourself as much as you love me.”
“That’s not physically possible, even I was in a good head space. The way that I love you...the amount that you love me...I could never love myself that much.”
“Is it sad that I feel the same way?”
“I think it speaks to how much we need each other,” he smiled towards you.
You spent the entire movie in his lap, with him holding you close and pressing soft kisses into your hair. Afterwords, you both just talked for hours about everything. His childhood, your childhood, past traumas, past relationships, what you both love each other, and you’re reservations about starting a relationship (you more than him). At the end of the night, Ransom decided he wanted to finish off the night with his head between your legs, which of course led to an all night love making session, that resulted in you sleeping in. A small smile coming to your face when you woke up in his arms, while he was in the middle of a business call.
The whole thing felt like a dream.
Fast forward to now, where all you want to do is ask Ransom to come over, but you know it’ll only make things worse. Ransom has begging you to let him come and see you for the last two weeks, but you can’t trust or control yourself around him, so you tell him no. You see it every night in his eyes when you two FaceTime, but this is the only solution that works for now.
With a heavy sigh, you get up off the sofa, and decide that food will be your way out of your misery. You’re almost at your kitchen when you hear a rather hard knock on your door. You stand there for a moment, contemplating letting whoever it is, before another rapid knock has you scowling in sheer irritation and making your way to your front door.
You should’ve ignored it.
“Jesus, what do you want?” you mutter once the open door reveals a pretty wet Jack.
“Hello to you too.”
“Jack, I’m really not in the mood today, so please-”
“So you’ll take Drysdale back, but you won’t even hear me out?”
“I haven’t taken anyone back-”
“Marta was crying at the bar to one of her friends about how she came over to talk to him about the company, and you were wrapped in a blanket and he was naked.”
“We had sex, Jack. That’s all. I’m very much single and not seeing anyone. Not like it’s any of your business.”
“I just wanna talk, Y/N. I’m not here to argue or raise hell. I just wanna talk, because we never actually got a chance to. If you can hear Drysdale out, you can hear me out too.”
“Ransom didn’t beat the shit out of me.”
“You know I’m sorry about that.”
“And the lies you’ve been spreading about me?”
“If you’ll just let me explain myself....please,” he begs pathetically.
It’s not like he deserves it, but you do have questions of your own.
“The moment I feel uncomfortable or fed up, you’re out of here,” you sigh as you step aside.
“I just wanna talk, I promise,” he tells you as he makes his way inside.
“The house is nice,” he compliments softly as he looks around.
“What did you want to say, Jack?” you question as you make your way to the kitchen.
“I’m sorry, Y/N. I really am, for all of it-”
“You could’ve sent all of that in a text.”
“I loved you. I love you. I just...my Mom never left my dad, and I figured we’d just make it work. My parents stayed together, your parents stayed together, Ransom’s parents-”
“So you just assumed that a toxic environment was okay?”
“I expected you to wait,” he sighs in pure disappointment, stopping at the entry way of your kitchen.
“That’s bullshit and we both know,” you scoff, crossing your arms and leaning against the counter. “You knew my parents were always going to push me to stay, so you took advantage of that. You never loved me, you loved the idea of loving me and took my love for granted, because you thought it would always be there.”
“Because you were so innocent in all of this?!”
“Jack, you started cheating years before I did! I begged you for a divorce and you refused to give me one! No, I’m not innocent, but I refuse to take the blame for everything that went wrong!”
“You didn’t do anything to try and fix-”
“No! You don’t get to yell at me and make me feel like shit! After all the work I did, it still wasn’t enough for you! Yeah, I slept with Ransom, I went away with him, I fell in love with him, but don’t act like I didn’t try to do everything to make you happy! You didn’t want a wife! You wanted a play to-”
“You were all too happy to be Ransom’s!”
“You’re the one who made the bet!”
“Because I thought you’d stay, no matter what!”
“BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T APPRECIATE ME!”
Jack is thoughtful before looking at you and saying, “I do love you, Y/N. Yes, it started as a bet, and I know it was wrong, but I do love you. I always thought...it’s all I’ve ever known. No, it’s not right, but that doesn’t make the mindset any easier to break itself out of. It started out as a bet, a cruel joke, but you made me love you. Beauty aside, you truly were everything I had ever wanted, I think you’re what mot of us want, honestly. I just...I got lost in all of the bullshit-”
“All of the bullshit I paid for.”
“I make my own money!”
“Your own money that you never spent! I foot the bill for all the shit you did!”
“Didn’t stop you from giving Ransom-”
“You don’t get to bring him up like he started all of this! Whatever I did with Ransom-”
“Like letting him fuck you on his balcony for everyone to see-”
“Where you yelled that you needed to get a whore just like that!” you snap. “Everything I did for Ransom, sexually and otherwise, I would’ve done for you! You shut me out and let this marriage fail! And for all the lies you’ve told-”
“You couldn’t really expect a clean-”
“YOU CHEATED ON ME!” you scream at him. “You cheated, you lied, manipulated me, embarrassed me, BEAT me, made me feel terrible about myself,” you trail off with a small sob as you wipe your eyes. “No, I shouldn’t have cheated, but it’s not like you gave me much incentive to try. There’s honestly no excuse for what you did! All because Ransom had a crush-”
“HE GETS EVERYTHING HE WANTS!”
“Do you even hear yourself right now?! How much of a fucking child you sound like?! Besides, what the fuck did I ever do to you?! You approached me! I’d never even spoken to you and you went out of your way to rope me into this bullshit! You made me fall in love with a version of you that doesn’t even exist-”
“That’s not true!”
“Yes it is! All of the charm, all of the kindness, all of the thoughtfulness was just a lie! All of it! It took you all of three months to cheat on me! I don’t believe that there’s single part of you that actually knows how to love and respect me, or anyone for that matter! I begged you for a divorce, multiple times, and you refused! It wasn’t enough that you won your fucking bet! What you did was cruel and fucking terrible! So yes, I fucked Ransom! I’m not going to feel bad because someone was giving me the affection and love you weren’t!”
“Drysdale isn’t some fucking saint-”
“He’s a hell of a lot better than you! He didn’t start this, you did! He didn’t cheat on me, you did! He didn’t go out of his way to hurt me, but you did! It’s not enough that ruined our marriage, and for the longest time, my fucking self esteem, but somehow I’m still the bad guy in all of this! You’re going out and spreading lies, everyone thinks I’m Ransom’s little whore, and everyone feels bad for you! Yet, you dare come to my home and tell me that your feelings are hurt because I fucked Ransom on a balcony?! Well, guess what? I let him fuck me on a hotel balcony in Chicago! I fucked him at our vow renewal party! I fucked him on our anniversary when you got too fucked up! I had been fucking him for over a year by the time you even realized something was off! That’s how wound up in yourself you were! You claim that you love me so much, but paid no fucking attention to me! There were nights that I didn’t come home, and you either didn’t care or were out with whoever fascinated you more than me and never even bothered to ask where I was! All of this was just a joke to you! It’s still a joke to you!”
“It’s not! I love-”
“Stop saying that!” you snap, slapping him hard across the face.
He takes a step towards, but you’re quick to raise your hand again, while opening the drawer full of knives, and placing your hand on the handle of the chef knife.
You’ll be dammed if you let him beat you up in your own fucking house.
“I’m a good person, Y/N. I have flaws, but I am a good person. Be with Ransom for all I care, but don’t come crawling back to me when he breaks your fucking heart!”
“I wouldn’t come crawling back to you if someone paid me to. Now, get the fuck out of my house,” you warn, fire in your eyes and scowl on your face.
Jack stands there for a moment, looking you over, before shaking his head and walking out, slamming door shut hard behind him.
You stay still for a moment, starting to shake before the tears start to rapidly fall and you let go of the knife. You blindly search your pockets for your phone, feeling your breathing start to become uneven and ragged.
‘Where the fuck did I put it?!’ you think to yourself as panic overtakes you.
When you get back to your living area, you’re quick to grab it off the arm of the sofa, quickly dialing the number of the only person you can think of.
“Hey, can I call you back? I’m in the middle of a meeting...what’s wrong? Are you okay?” Ransom asks, worry laced in every word, once he hears your sobbing and uneven breaths.
“Ne...nee...,” you sob, frustrated with yourself for not being able to put a sentence together. “Need you...shit!”
“I’m on my way. Are you home?”
“Mhm.”
“I’m on my way,” he promises before hanging up.
You make your way over to the corner nearest you and sit in it, clenching your eyes shut as you try to regulate your breathing and focus on something that calms you. No, you had no clue that seeing Jack would trigger a panic attack, the last one happening maybe a week after Jack beating the shit out of you, but you’re happy you invited him in nonetheless. You didn’t know how much you needed to say all of those things until you saw him, and you’re proud of yourself for standing your ground.
You’re also proud of yourself for slapping the shit out of him.
“Y/N!” Ransom yells as he makes his way into your house.
Of course you forgot to lock the door.
“Y/N, where are-”
“Here,” you squeak, still trying to stop your tears.
“What happened? Are you okay?” Ransom asks as he quickly makes his way to your side. You feel his fingers scanning over you, searching for bruises or scars, and you shake your head ‘no’ in a feeble attempt to tell him that you’re physically fine. “Y/N, what happened?”
“Ransom...please,” you sob as you wrap your arms around him and bury your face in the crook of his neck.
“It’s alright, baby. I’m here and everything is okay, I promise,” he coos softly, wrapping his arms around your waist, before standing up and picking you up.
You instinctively wrap your legs around his waist, doing your best to match your breathing with his heartbeat, slowly calming down as he closes your front door and locks it.
“It’s okay, baby,” he reassures you again gently, softly stroking your back as he makes his way upstairs. “I’m here now and I promise to not let anything happen to you. I’ll keep you safe.”
When he reaches your bedroom, he pulls back the covers and sets you down on your bed gently before getting in next to you, and pulling the covers over the both of you. You take note of his wet hair and you want to apologize for all of this, but you can’t find your voice or the strength. You’re using all the strength you have to hold him close, needing to feel safe and loved.
“Just rest, baby. I’m right here. I’m right here,” he coos into your hair before kissing it.
You finally feel calm enough to rest, the voices and memories in your head finally calming down enough for to start seeing through the fog. As you succumb to unconsciousness, you know one thing for certain: Ransom will always be the only person you’ll ever feel completely safe with.
Ransom will always be the love of your life.
**
3 Weeks Later
“Why do I feel like you’re not having fun?!” Daisy yells over the music, a small pout on her lips, small slur in her words as she tries to steady herself.
“I am!” you lie with a laugh, your own slur apparent as you take note of the fact that your fourth drink is halfway finished.
“You forget that I’ve known you forever! Your eye twitches when you lie! What’s wrong?! Is it because Jack is here?! I can have his ass thrown out!”
“It’s a club, Dais!” you chuckle, taking a sip of your Mai Tai.
“It’s my 31st birthday!”
“It’s not him, I promise! I just haven’t been out in a while! I promise I’m okay!”
“Bullshit, but I’ll leave it alone...for now!” she warns before making her way back to the dance floor and you laugh.
It’s not like you’re not trying to have a good time, but you just miss Ransom. Your mind keeps going back to when you had your panic attack and he came over in an instant. The memory causes your heart to flutter in your chest.
“Tell them I’ll take care of it when I get back,” you heard Ransom softly demand as he typed on his laptop. “Besides, the work on their end isn’t done anyway. If I have to tell them one more fucking time to show me the cover design, people are getting fucking fired....I don’t care! The book is due out in 3 months, and I haven’t seen shit. They want their fucking corrections? Show me a fucking book cover. It’s not that goddamn hard!” he snapped softly before hanging up.
There’s the Ransom you know.
“Did I get you in trouble?” you croaked softly, voice still sore from all the crying.
“Did I wake you? I’m sorry-”
“No no,” you reassured him as you sat up a little, looking around and seeing that was dark. “How long have I been asleep?”
“About three hours. Are you okay?”
“I have a headache,” you told him as you rested your head on his arm and sighed in contentment.
You’d missed him so much.
“I’m sorry I interrupted-”
“Don’t be. I brought you up some water. You should sit up and have some.”
“You didn’t have to stay...I shouldn’t have called-”
“Stop, Y/N. Sit up and have some water,” he urged again and sighed and gave in. “What happened?” he asked as he closed his laptop.
“Jack came over and-”
“HE WHAT?!”
“Ransom, it’s okay. Nothing happened. He wanted me to hear him out, and big surprise, there was nothing to hear. I started yelling, he kept bringing up that I cheated with you, so I of course got angrier and went off on him, I ended up slapping him and he walked towards me like he was gonna hit me back, but I raised my hand again...he told me that he’s a good person with some flaws and that you’re just gonna break my heart before he walked out and slammed the door shut. I don’t know, I guess reliving all of that trauma mentally, watching come towards me as if he wanted to hit me, seeing him...it triggered a panic attack. I hadn’t seen him in so long and it was...I could only think of you,” you confessed softly, too anxious to look up at him.
You had experienced entirely too many emotions in one day.
“You can always call me whenever you need me,” he promised you softly as he stroked your hair.
“No, you don’t have to-”
“I love you, Y/N. I always have and I always will. You think I would put a fucking meeting before you? You think I would put anything before you? You are my world and I’ll always be there for you. No matter what,” he told you sincerely.
Your heart both swelled and broke at his words. You couldn’t help but wonder if he told Marta the exact same thing when he was working to get his share of the inheritance back.
“Can you stay tonight? You being here just calms me and-”
“You don’t have to explain anything to me, Sweet Thing. If it makes you feel better, I’m more than happy to do it,” he assured you softly.
You want so badly to believe every thing he says, but how the hell are you supposed to do that? How are you supposed to turn a blind eye and pretend nothing ever happened when-
“Ya know, you’ve been looking sad all night,” a random man says to you, pulling you out of your thoughts.
“I promise I’m not,” you mutter as you waive the waiter over once you notice that you’ve completely finished off your drink.
“You don’t wanna give Jack the satisfaction of seeing you so unhappy, do you?”
“I’m sorry, do I know-ugh, get away from me, Tyson,” you scowl once you finally turn your full attention to the guy disrupting your evening of sulking.
“C’mon,” he smirks as he strokes your arm, “I know you know how to show a guy a good time, and I’ll be more than happy to show you a good time.”
“A guy beats the shit out of me, but I’m labeled a whore for doing the same thing he did to me. Amazing,” you mutter as you roll your eyes.
“Oh, c’mon, honey. I saw you that night on Ransom’s balcony-”
“Leave me alone, Tyson.”
“Don’t be a bitch! Jack said you were an easy fuck-”
“I’m sorry to break it to you, but like he does with everyone else, he fucking lied to you. Now leave me-”
“You know you want it,” he pushes as he grips your arm, tight.
“She said to fuck off, Tyson. I’m pretty sure she fucking meant it,” Ransom snaps, pulling Tyson off of the bar stool next to you. “Fuck off.”
“C’mon Ransom! You can’t just keep her to yourself-”
“She fucking said no! Do you want me to show you what happens when I get pissed the fuck off over someone not listening to her and what she wants?!” he warns in practically a growl.
“You two are fucking pathetic,” Tyson scoffs, “I’ll find some other whore to suck me off, I’m not worried,” he shrugs with a devilish grin.
Ransom lunges towards him but you’re quick to grab his arm, looking up at him with pleading eyes, “please, Ransom. He isn’t worth it.”
Though you can see the fear in his eyes, Tyson tries to mask it before walking off.
“You should’ve let me kill him,” Ransom mutters, taking the seat that belonged to Tyson.
“You can’t beat up every guy who’s mean to me.”
“Only when you’re around.”
“Ransom-”
“Besides, why are you wearing a dress like this when I’m not with you?” he questions, taking a sip of his bourbon as his hungry eyes look you over.
“One,” you start as you turn your attention to your drink, pressing your thighs together because that look always makes you feral, “I didn’t pick out this outfit, Daisy did. Two, you’re not my boyfriend and I don’t have to run everything past you.”
Why do you always bait him? Seriously, at this point, you’re just begging for complication.
“You’ve been avoiding me for a week, and you think you have the right to catch an attitude with me right now?” he questions, leaning in and resting his hand on your bare upper thigh, and your breath hitches. “Don’t forget who you really belong to, Sweet Thing.”
“You...you’ve been seen with women-”
“Don’t. They flirt with me, I don’t flirt with them. I always go home alone, waiting for and wanting you.”
“Ransom-”
“I belong to you just like you belong to me, or did you forget? Did you forget everything I told you? Does daddy need to remind you?” he presses, giving your thigh a firm squeeze.
After he’d come over and stayed with you after your panic attack, you wanted him around all the time, and it was becoming too much for you. You two hadn’t even slept together (you two hadn’t done anything sexual in a while), you just craved to be in his space.
Ransom has made it a point in his life to put up walls and shut everyone out, but with you, he makes you his whole world and that makes it so hard to stay away from him. It’s not that you need him to be all about you all the time, but you’d be a liar if you said that having that kind of effect on him wasn’t something that made you feel just a little special though.
However, it’s so much more than that.
Ransom talks to you. Not at you, but to you. He doesn’t treat you as if you’re some object to just keep his cock warm and entertain him when he’s bored, he takes note of the things you actually like and surprises you with them, he’s gotten a lot better at talking to you about things instead of shutting down, he opens up to you about his childhood and his issues with his parents, his issues with Walt, and the issues he had with Harlan.
He doesn’t only call you when he wants sex and he respects your wishes when you say no, he calls you when he’s upset and lets you in, he calls when he’s lonely and just wants to hear your voice, he calls when something good actually happens and wants you to know immediately, he calls to ask about your day, he calls when he’s worried about you.
Never in a million years would you have thought of Ransom as someone who can be gentle and kind, and with the way he talks to people who aren’t you, you still can’t see him that way at times, but when given a chance, he truly can be. It’s understandable that after being around shitty people all your life, you become a product of your environment, but all Ransom ever wanted was for someone to listen to him and not treat him like some trinket.
That’s what everyone wants, but you definitely need it as a child.
Perhaps, if it had happened before everything else, all of this would be a lot fucking easier get past. Maybe it wouldn’t have happened at all. However, the fact of the matter is that he did lie and he broke your heart. Sure, he says that you’re not just another Marta to him, but if he made two bets concerning you, how the hell are you supposed to believe him now? How are you supposed to believe that he’s not just trying to string you along until he’s bored?
However, none of that really matters at the moment. Right now, both you and Ransom are drunk, touch starved, and desperate for each other.In this moment, all that matters to you is holding on to your resolve, which isn’t going well at all.
“Ransom, don’t fucking st-start...holy shit,” you sigh softly as his hands travels upward.
“Don’t fucking what, Sweet Thing? You’re opening your legs up for me, so I know you don’t want me to stop,” he smirks as he uses two fingers to push your panties to the side before starting to stroke your clit.
“Fuck!” you sigh softly as Ransom leans in close.
“Do you know how many times daddy has watched that video you sent? The one where you soak your panties?”
“Ransom-”
“Every single morning and every single fucking night,” he coos before biting the shell of your ear.
“Not here,” you pant softly, even though you desperately want it.
“ ‘Not here’ what, baby?” he taunts, using two fingers to spread your lips apart before easily sliding them inside of you.
“Daddy!” you cry softly, gripping the sides of your chair tight as you try and hang on.
You feel Jack’s eyes on you without even looking his way, and you know he knows what you two are up to.
Hell, anyone in close proximity more than likely knows.
“You keep making me wait and for what? You know you miss me being stuffed deep inside-”
“Daddy...please!” you beg as he curls his fingers. “You know...it’s too much, daddy!”
“At least you’re finally remembering your manners,” he chuckles softly. “So pathetic...you’re my little whore, aren’t you?”
“I’m anything you want me to be, please! Just let me...aht!”
“Don’t make a scene, Sweet Thing,” he chuckles darkly. “Should I fuck you in front of everyone like I did on my balcony that night? Does everyone need a fucking reminder that you’re mine?”
“Daddy please,” you whimper as you clench around him.
“You’ve got me so fucking hard right now, Sweet Thing. I swear to God!” he growls before biting down on your shoulder. “Go ahead, tell daddy how much you want it!”
“Need it! I need you so much!”
“Cum, like the good little girl you are, and then we’re gonna go back to my place so daddy can remind you why it’s in your best interest to behave.”
The fact that you don’t scream when you cum hard has you both shocked, because it definitely is enough to soak the little part of your dress that you’re still sitting on.
“Did so good,” he taunts “came so hard without making too much of a mess,” he chuckles as he slowly removes his fingers. “Now, clean me up and we’ll get out of here,” he snaps, shoving his fingers into your mouth while pulling his wallet out with his free hand.
You don’t even try to stop the moan that leaves your mouth as the bar tender comes over and takes Ransom’s card. Once you finish using your tongue to clean him off, you know the look you’re giving him is that of pure lust and desire, and the shit-eating grin that’s on his face only confirms that.
“We’re leaving-”
“Daisy,” you quickly interrupt, vaguely remembering why you left your house in the first place.
“You want to bring her?”
“No,” you laugh softly, “it’s her birthday. I came out for her-”
“Look at her, Sweet Thing. Do you really think she has any intention of leaving with you tonight?” he laughs as he motions to her on the dance floor, grinding between two guys while making-out with one of them.
So much for your saving grace.
“No, you’re gonna come home with me tonight, let me use you how I want to, and then-”
“You two are fucking sick,” Jack growls as he approaches the both of you.
Apparently, the alcohol has everyone feeling loose tonight.
“Back off,” Ransom warns as he stands in front you.
“She’ll always be-”
“She was never yours. The way she’d beg for me in her sleep, the fact that she never wanted to fuck you after sleeping with me, the fact that she never opened up to you like she opened up to me-”
“She’s just a slut and you’re just a piece of shit-”
“I’d advise you to use better manners when you talk about her in front of me,” Ransom warns, gripping Jack’s throat before throwing him against the bar.
“Ransom!” you yell as everyone turns their attention towards the scene.
“You stay away from her, understand me?” he warns, completely ignoring your pleas and cries. “No more calls, texts, impromptu visits, nothing. The divorce is final, she wants nothing to do with you, all of the assets have been split, so this is the last time you speak to her or me for that matter. Is that understood?”
“Ransom-”
“Do you understand me?!” he questions, gripping Jack’s neck tighter.
“You’ll fuck this up, just like you do everything else in your life,” Jack coughs, a sick smile playing on his lips.
Ransom doesn’t hesitate before landing a blow with his right fist.
“Ransom!”
“This is the last time I’m gonna be nice about it,” warns, throwing Jack down and taking a step back. “Stay the fuck away from her.”
Ransom’s quick to throw cash down on the bar and grab his card, before taking your hand and pulling you behind him as he storms out.
If there was any fight left in you to tell him no, it’s sure as shits gone now.
“Fuck!” you whimper as Ransom shoves you against the wall the moment he closes the door to his house.
The entire car ride, he was fingering you and telling you all of the dirty things he had in store for you the second you got into his house.
“Can’t wait to have to begging and screaming all night in my fucking bed. Missed you so fucking much,” he husks, hoisting you up and forcing your legs around his waist.
“Daddy please!” you beg as you fumble with his belt and undo his pants.
“When did you become so pathetic, baby? Hmm? I know you love daddy’s dick, but you’ve never never begged like this before,” he chuckles darkly as he rips your panties off of you.
“Been so fucking long, daddy!”
“And whose fault is that?” he questions as he thrusts two fingers inside of you.
“MINE! IT’S ALL MY FAULT, DADDY!”
“I’ve barely even done anything to you,” he growls darkly as he picks up his pace. “Have you learned your lesson? Are you gonna stop denying daddy what’s his?” he broods as he curls his fingers inside your tight little cunt and picks up his pace, teasing your clit with light circles with his thumb.
“Anything...anything you want, daddy!”
“Cum for me you little fucking slut! Cum hard for daddy!”
It’s not like you need much coaxing.
“All that cream for me and I haven’t even rubbed the tip of my cock against your fucking pussy? You really are the most pathetic little thing, aren’t you?” he chuckles as he pulls his two fingers from your pussy.
“I need you to fill me up, please! I need it!” you whimper, forcing his pants down. “You promised to fill me up!”
“Anyone else been in this perfect little snatch?” he grunts, sinking you down on his cock.
You whine, grinding your hips against his,“fuck! No...only want you! I always want you!”
“God, you’re needy tonight, Sweet Thing,” he chuckles condescendingly. “Did you wanna fuck Tyson tonight?”
“No daddy! No one ever has my attention! No one...no one except...you!”
“Good girl,” he praises as he grips your throat and starts rutting into relentlessly.
“Aht! Please..yes!”
“This is what you need, baby? To fucked hard and fast? Like the little slut you are?”
The only response you can muster is garbled and something between a whimper and a moan.
“This is the only time I’m gonna take it easy on you, so you better fucking thank me after I let you cum on my cock,” he warns as he starts kneading your clit with his knuckles.
“Fuck!”
You gasp and try to push his hand away, but he isn’t having that, “did I tell you to do that?” he growls gripping your throat tighter as tears start to well in your eyes. “Awh, those pretty tears for me?” he coos, licking one of them with just the tip of his tongue. “Still taste so fucking good!”
“Daddy...so full! Feels too good! Please!”
“You can still remember your manners? Guess daddy is gonna have to work all night to fuck you stupid, Sweet Thing,” he smirks, angling himself he hits that part deep within you that has you seeing stars.
“HOLY FUCK!”
“C’mon, give daddy what’s his,” he begs “give me what I need!”
You scream out his name as dig your nails into his shoulders, panting as you involuntarily grind your hips against him, your body spasms a bit as Ransom rides out your high.
God, if that was him taking it easy on you, you honestly don’t know if you’re gonna be able to last the rest of the night.
“Get on your knees and clean daddy off,” he demands roughly, pulling out and setting you down, and you don’t need to be told twice.
You whine at the sight in front of you; his proud angry red cock standing at attention, your essence dripping off it, and twitching just a little. The moment you get your mouth on him, you moan in satisfaction, eager to take as much of him as possible.
“Always such a good girl for me,” he groans, gripping your hair tight. “Now, hold still while daddy fucks your face like the little rag doll that you are,” he instructs in an authoritative tone that makes you clench around nothing.
You barely have time to get prepare yourself before Ransom starts roughly face fucking you. The last time you two did this, Jack was having friends over and you two almost got caught because Ransom couldn’t wait to get you upstairs...or for later that night.
Jack came into the kitchen looking for the good bottle of vodka just as Ransom had tucked himself back into his pants. Since your mascara was running down your face (courtesy of pleasure tears), Ransom made it seem as if he was consoling you about something. It’s not like Jack really seemed to care, which is why you didn’t feel the slightest bit of guilt when you snuck out and stayed up all night with Ransom later that night.
In fact, you’re more than sure you look the same way right now.
“Missed this fucking mouth...always taking my cock....so fucking well! “
You blink back tears as your hand travels down between your legs and starts to massage your clit.
“Forgot just how much you love being my little fuck toy. Daddy didn’t tell you to play with yourself, did I?”
You look up at him with pleading eyes, begging for mercy. Besides, it’s not like he’s not about to keep you up teaching you lessons on why you should behave.
“Fuck, alright, get yourself off. Fuck that little snatch and make a mess. Daddy’s gonna fill your little whore mouth!”
With a pathetic, gargled moan, you squirt hard, trying to maintain contain as you felt your release drip down your thighs.
“Christ!” he growls, filling your mouth his warm seed and moan in satisfaction, realizing just how much you missed his taste. “Open,” demands gruffly, breathing heavy as he tries to keep control of the situation.
You’ll be shocked if you two ever make it to the bed.
You open wide, some of his release trickling down your chin, and he slaps his cock against your tongue.
“Fucking swallow,” he demands, grabbing your shoulder and yanking you upwards.
He gives you half a second to do as you’re told before he’s picking you up, and forcing your legs around him again. You grip him tight as he pins you against the wall and kisses you passionately.
“Daddy’s tired of sleeping without you, Sweet Thing,” he broods, peppering sloppy wet kisses along your jawline.
“Please...please don’t!” you mewl, tugging at his shirt, trying to pull it up and off of him.
“Making daddy spend all these nights alone, taking care of myself...” he presses, getting his hands on the front of your dress and ripping it open, “fuck!”
“So lonely without you!”
“Yeah? Why is that, sweet girl?”
“Love you, daddy! I love you so much!”
“And you’re gonna spend all night showing me just how much,” he smirks before wrapping his arms around you waist and whisking you away upstairs.
You wish you could turn it off. How much you love him, how much you crave him, and how much you’ve come to desire every bit of his existence. It’s not healthy, the little dance you two do, but having part of him is better than having none of him. When everything first started, it was easy to say that it’s just sex (because it really was for you), but Ransom worked his way into your heart. Even on nights like tonight, when the sex is pure filth and not romantic in the slightest, just the feel of him is enough to make all the noise in your head stop.
The way he kisses, takes care of every part of your body, worships every part of your body, the things he says, the way he holds you...it’s impossible for you not to give in to him. You know that when you wake up in the morning, you’ll be at war with yourself just like you always are after you give in to him, but you just can’t be bothered to care about that right now. Not when he has you right where you always want to be.
“Pussy is too fucking good, Sweet Thing!” Ransom grunts, fucking you hard from behind as you claw at the bed.
You honestly don’t know how long you two have been going at it, and you lost count of the positions he had you in after the handcuffs broke. It’s not like you didn’t know that you’d missed every single part of him, but it helped to ease the pain a little that came with trying to be strong for yourself. However, the moment he came near you at the bar, your body and soul desperately craved him.
To get lost in the never ending dramatic mystery that is Hugh Ransom Drysdale.
“Please...can’t...I need to-”
“Need it, Sweet Thing! Daddy needs you to soak the bed. I haven’t had you like this in so long...I need it, baby! I love you so much! Please!”
You don’t mean to cry out as loud as you do as your final orgasm of the night washes over you, but it’s probably one of the most (if not the most) euphoric orgasms you’ve ever had. Everything fades around you for a moment and you feel as if you’re on a cloud that’s being charged by the most pleasurable sparks that set every part of your body alight in the most pleasurable way.
Ransom’s pornographic yell of your name is what brings you back to reality as you feel the mix of your juices run down your leg.
“You did so good tonight, Sweet Thing,” Ransom praises softly as he pulls out, catching you right before you collapse onto the bed. “You okay, baby?”
“Mhm,” you nod, trying to get yourself as close to him as possible, not even caring that the both of you need to shower. “I love you.”
“Take me back.”
“Lets not do this tonight,” you yawn, laying your head on his chest as he throws a cover over the both of you.
“You won’t answer me and you won’t see me-”
“Ransom-”
“We can make this work. You’re just as miserable as I am-”
“I don’t trust you.”
“It’s not keeping you away.”
“Tonight doesn’t count, honey.”
“I’ll take you away again.”
“You can’t just take me away every time you want to fix things between us,” you giggle, eyes still closed as you make little circles on his chest with your pointer finger.
“Just say yes.”
“Ransom-”
“Do you love me?”
“You know that I do.”
“Then say yes.”
“It won’t fix everything.”
“But it’ll help with some things.”
“Ransom-”
“Getting out of this hell will help. We need time away and to clear our heads.”
“I don’t even know where we would go.”
“I do, you just have to say yes.”
“Ransom-”
“Just say yes.”
Your heart is agreeing before your mind could tell you to leave, “yes.”
“Good, because we leave next week.”
“WHAT?!” you snap, shooting up.
“In my defense, this night wasn’t supposed to go like this at all.”
“Ransom...what did you do?”
“I’m assuming your passport is up to date.”
“PASSPORT?! RANSOM-”
“Is it?”
“Jesus, yes. Ransom-”
“Lay back down so I can hold you.”
“Ransom-”
“Do you want me to remind you who’s in charge?”
“Ransom-”
“Get back over here,” he smirks, pulling you down as you giggle. “I want...I need for us to get away together. Time alone will be good for us.”
“You planned all of this?”
“I had a plan, Sweet Thing. I was going to pick you up from Daisy’s party, take you to that park you love so much, and tell you everything. Then I started drinking because I got nervous. Then, I saw Tyson all over you and lost my shit, and the outfit you were wearing only got me even more fired up, and then Jack came over...I had a plan.”
“Ransom, we can’t just-”
“Trying again isn’t a bad idea. Besides, I already told you I’m not giving up on us so, if you would’ve said no to this, I would’ve thought of something else. I’m not giving you up because we-”
“Ransom, you can’t just keep holding on to hope that-”
“Why can’t I? You love me and I love you Yeah, I fucked up, but I didn’t do anything that can’t be fixed.”
“You slept with Daisy.”
“I didn’t even cum and I was soft after two pumps. I very clearly didn’t fuck her.”
“Ransom-”
“I don’t want anyone else, Y/N,” he sighs as tightens his hold on you. “I don’t need anyone else.”
“We’ll talk about all of this in the morning, okay?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, babe. We’ll try and figure it out tomorrow.”
“Just don’t change your mind,” he sighs as he relaxes against you. “I can be the man you want me to be, the man you need me to be. I just need you to believe in me like you did before.”
“In the morning, babe. We’ll talk about all of it in the morning,” you yawn as you succumb to sleep.
As a million thoughts roll through your mind, there’s one that just won’t leave you alone:
What the hell are you supposed to do with Hugh Ransom Drysdale?
**
“HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?!” your Mother screams the second you answer your phone.
“Hello to you too, Mother.”
“You let Ransom-”
“Just stay out of it. I don’t need to hear about how disappointed you are, and I don’t want to-”
“I don’t approve of him, Y/N!”
“Well, I’ve got one thing working in my favor, because the last guy you approved of beat the shit out of me.”
“How many times do I need to apologize for that?!”
“Because you’ve apologized for it so much? When’s the last time you invited me to one of your garden parties or something-”
“You don’t enjoy them!”
“Since when have you ever gave a damn about that?”
“You insist on making the family look bad-”
“How is it always my fault? No matter what I do, I’m always wrong!”
“He’s not someone you want to end up with!”
“Once again, you should stay out of things that you know nothing about.”
“So, you’re just letting random men finger you in-”
“I don’t even leave the house! Besides, how do you even know about that?!”
“Jack is telling everyone about-”
“Of course he is, and of course you believe whatever he says.”
“Is it a lie?”
“Nope.”
“Y/N-”
“It’s time for me to make my own decisions about what will make me happy. No, it’s it not necessarily the best idea, but I love him. I love him, he makes me happy, and I don’t know...I haven’t decided on anything yet.”
“Y/N-”
“However,” you quickly interrupt, “it’s my choice and I’m done doing whatever you and Dad tell me.”
“Do you know what Linda is saying about you?!”
“Linda hates everyone, so I’m not surprised that she hates me.”
“Y/N, do you realize what you’ve done to your reputation?! I told you to stop sleeping with that boy, and now look! No one has any respect for you, your grandmother is furious with you, you’ll be lucky-”
“That sounds like a them problem! Jack cheated on me! Jack beat me! Jack lied to me! Yet, somehow, I’m the bad guy? I was a bet to him!”
“And now you’re a joke to everyone.”
“Thanks mom,” you scoff. “As much as I’ve enjoyed you raking me across the coals, I’ve got to-”
“We need you to come over next week.”
“I won’t be in town next week.”
“Move whatever you’re doing-”
“No, you shouldn’t have assumed I would be around. I don’t sit around and wait for you and Dad to need me for something.”
“What the hell do you have to do that’s so important that you can’t help your Father and I.”
“I honestly don’t know, I just know I’ll be out of the country. I’m going on a trip and-”
“You planned a trip, but you don’t know where you’re going?”
“I didn’t plan anything, Ransom did.”
“HAVE YOU LOST YOUR FUCKING MIND?!”
“I knew you’d take it well.”
“What the hell has gotten into you?!”
“Once I know, I’ll let you know.”
“It doesn’t bother you-”
“It bothers you that I’m not letting you control me, the way Nanna controlled you! Your hatred for Ransom aside, it fucking burns you that I didn’t stay in a toxic relationship like you did-”
“I stayed for you!”
“I begged you to get a divorce! It wasn’t for me, it was because your Mother drilled it into your head that you needed to put up with things that you shouldn’t have, and I’m really sorry that you had to put up with that, but it’s not my fault! I want to be happy and yeah, it’s messy as hell, but at least I’m trying to figure it out! So, stop making me feel like shit because you chose a life of comfort over a life of independence!”
“Don’t come crying to me when he breaks your heart,” your sniffles and you roll your eyes.
“Well, I didn’t the first time, so I’m sure I’ll be fine without you if it happens again.”
“You’ll learn the hard way. Love isn’t what you need, what you need is security. Once you finally grow up, you’ll realize that,” she snaps before hanging up.
You sigh before throwing your phone down on the coffee table and leaning back onto the sofa.
“That sounds like it was fun,” Daisy scoffs as she brings you a glass of juice.
“Just another day of me letting down my family.”
“Your family let you down years ago. It’s only time you return the favor,” she shrugs as she takes a seat next to you.
“What the fuck am I doing, Dais?”
“Babe, if you don’t know, I sure as shit don’t. Hell, I’ve been staying here all week as your Ransom kryptonite.”
“The only way I can keep him away is if you’re here,” you laugh as you grab your drink, coughing as soon as you swallow the first sip. “Dais!”
“Yeah, that’s a vodka cranberry.”
“Is there any cranberry in this?!”
“Of course! Where do you think the color came from?”
“Jesus Christ, Dais!” you laugh, putting the glass down and getting comfortable on the sofa again.
“I was gonna just get you juice, but I heard the phone call and-”
“If she’s not happy with me now, she’s never gonna be happy with me.”
“Fuck her. Yeah, I know, she’s your Mother, but it’s not like she fucking acts like it. It doesn’t matter that she had a tough childhood, if anything, it should’ve been more of an incentive for her to treat you better, not make sure you’re just as miserable as she was. That little outburst was long overdue.”
“What’s it like to know everything?”
“I don’t know shit,” she laughs as she laid back, “I just know how I dealt with my dad after my mom died. No, they weren’t the best together, but they did love another. When she died, he did his best to be there for me and made sure I never felt alone. He looked out for me. No, he didn’t deal with everything the best, but he did make sure that I was taken care of. That’s what your Mom should’ve done, not try and make your life harder.”
“When’s the last time you talked to your Dad?”
“Eh, he called after my birthday party. Wanted to make sure I was safe.”
“How is it that we’re grown ass adults, and our parents still find out every little thing that we do?”
“Cause we live in a town of gossiping pieces of shit. Nothing is ever a secret,” she sighs with a soft smile. “I’m gonna fight Ransom for taking you away from me for two weeks.”
“I’ll be sure to let him know,” you laugh, taking another drink from your glass. “What the fuck am I doing Dais?”
“Figuring out what makes you happy.”
“I shouldn’t be with him, should I?”
“I can’t say anything, because I don’t know him the way you do, but I know there’s been a change in him. No, I’m not best friends with the guy, or do I ever hangout with him, but he really has cut down on all the shady shit. I don’t know, I guess I believe him. I still don’t like the asshole, but he seems really committed to you and making sure that you understand that.”
“Why did he have to make the fucking bet?!”
“You act like Ransom’s ever cared about anything-”
“He has-” you quickly defend before you can stop yourself.”He has...maybe not relationship wise, but he did care about his family...I’m not going to defend some of his actions, because some of it is inexcusable and I know that, and maybe I am a complete idiot, but I just...he lets me in, Dais. He lets me in past all the drama and all the bullshit. It should take more than that though, shouldn’t it? All the people hes hurt, all the wrong hes done...it should take more for me to be this in love with him, shouldn’t it?”
“You know me, babe. I’ve never been in love and I don’t think I ever will be, so I don’t know how any of this shit works. However, the way you light up when he calls you? The way you smile and giggle at your phone when he texts you? The way you try to not look at him when you two are in the same space? You never had that with Jack. That spark, that smile, that laugh...only Ransom brings that out of you, and I hate that I believe him. I hate that Hugh Ransom Drysdale is the love of your life, cause he’s such a piece of shit,” she scoffs and you burst out laughing. “Make him work for it though, this trip is nothing. Make him grovel.”
“I don’t want any groveling,” you laugh, “I just don’t wanna fuck it up again.”
“I really do think you’ve got it right this time. No, I don’t like the kid, but I’ve never seen him act like this.”
“He did fuck you.”
“Attempted, I wasn’t really having fun and his mind was 100% somewhere else. I saw the way he fucked you on that balcony, I definitely got gypped.”
“You’re a fucking mess,” you giggle.
“When is Prince Charming coming to whisk you away to...?”
“I have no idea where he’s taking me, I just know I need my passport. He said he’ll be here at 3:30 in the morning.”
“He’s probably gonna take you to London.”
“Why would he do that?”
“Girl, you already need your passport, so it’s not gonna be anywhere local, and you’re obsessed with London. If I know that, I’m sure as shit he does too. How the fuck does he know so much about you anyway?”
“The hell if I know,” you scoff before finishing off your drink. “Thanks for agreeing to watch my house.”
“Of course! You think Jack is gonna come around or something?”
“I honestly don’t know, but I’d rather be safe than sorry. If Ransom suspects that Jack has done anything to hurt or upset me, he’ll kill him and I don’t need that shit.”
“Ransom talks a lot of shit and yeah, he can throw a punch, but he isn’t actually capable of killing someone.”
“Tell that to Fran,” you mutter as you grab your phone that won’t stop going off. “Hey you.”
“You should be asleep,’” Ransom yawns and you can tell that he has yet to fall asleep.
“You’re coming to get me, so shouldn’t you be asleep?”
“Why do you want me to stay away? Are you trying to get me to confess that I miss you?”
“I can’t tell if you’re annoyed or not.”
“You know that I am.”
“Ransom-”
“We’re about to spend two weeks away together, but you needed to spend a week away from me?”
“Ransom, I can’t think straight when I’m around you. Besides, it’s not like you even texted me all week-”
“Because you’ve been avoiding me!”
“Did you call just to argue with me?”
“No,” he mutters and you can tell he’s pouting, “I wanted to remind you that I’ll be there at 3:30.”
“I remember,” you laugh softly.
“Come over.”
“No.”
“Then let me come over.”
“Daisy is sleeping over.”
“Jesus fuck!”
“We’ll be together soon enough.”
“You really are the most infuriating person to be in love with.”
“You’re one to talk.”
“Alright, I’m not gonna go down that road. I love you, see you in a few hours.”
“I love you,” you laugh softly before hanging up.
“Alright, back the fuck up,” Daisy snaps as you throw your phone down, “what the fuck did you mean by ‘tell that to Fran’?!”
“Oh, don’t tell me you haven’t heard the whispers-”
“About Harlan!”
“Why is it easier to believe that he killed Harlan, which he didn’t, than it is to believe that?”
“You see the assholes we’re constantly around. All of them would kill for money, and I can definitely see Drysdale offing his grandfather to make sure that he still gets his money.”
“That’s why he killed Fran.”
“The fuck did Fran do?”
“She kept telling Marta that she should break up with him because it wasn’t real to him. He wanted the money and he wasn’t being faithful, and that was getting in the way of his plans. Also, he never liked Fran anyway, so he poisoned her.”
“How are you so calm about this? How are you okay with it?!”
“Because I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing, Dais,” you laugh incredulously. “Never in a million years did I think I would capable of loving someone like Ransom. None of this is as black and white as I’d like for it to be. Yeah, he made a bet about me twice, he killed Fran, he’s a privileged asshole, he’s entitled, he’s arrogant...the list goes on, so that should be enough though, right? All of that is more than enough reason for me to walk away, but then there’s everything else. There’s the side that hes learned to keep hidden because of people like his family and Tommy Smotts. The fact that the only reason he didn’t speak up on my wedding day because he saw how happy I was, he was the one who told Jack to get me that dragonfly set because Jack didn’t know what the fuck to get me, the fact that he beat the shit out of Jack, when I call he stops everything for me, he’s funny, he’s incredibly sweet and thoughtful if you give him the chance to be. It’s the fact that when I’m not with him, I feel like a part of me is missing until I’m with him again. It’s the fact that he wants more than just sex and he actually fucking listens when I talk. He asks my opinion on the things he does with the publishing company, he will sit on FaceTime with me for hours just because I’m feeling lonely, he doesn’t do anything without taking me into consideration. Hell, last week, he had a bunch of groceries delivered to my house and it was everything I loved. The reason? He text me saying that he got groceries for himself and he figured he’d get some for me just in case I need something.
I really wish I could make a choice, because it would make my life a hell of a lot easier, but there are so many levels to him. Yeah, I know why he should be better for everyone and not just me, but it’s not like I don’t get why he is the way he is. No one in his life has ever given him a reason to do better, so he just shut down. I can’t fault him for that. Obviously murder is bad, but it’s not like that whole family isn’t capable of it. Linda did almost kill Richard after she found out about the cheating that went on behind her back for months. Is that making an excuse for him? Maybe it is, but that whole family is rotten so it makes sense. Hell, Walt was all set to go to jail before all the evidence mysteriously went away. I just...it was just sex for me when it all started. A way to get back at Jack for all the wrong he did and finally feeling wanted and cared about, but it was so much more than to Ransom and it has been for a while. He didn’t take the $40,000 and for as fed up and angry as hes been, he hasn’t gone to seek affection and attention from anyone else. He loves me, Daisy and I love him. God, I love him so much and I really wish I could just choose.”
“I’m sure this trip will be the best way for you to do that,” she smiles softly as you wipe your eyes. “How about we fall asleep to ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre?”
“You always know how to make a girl smile” you laugh softly, making your way over to and cuddling up against her.
As you two slowly fall asleep to blood curdling screams, your mind wanders back to Ransom, like it always does. You hope that by the end of this trip, you can finally decide once and for all if he’s worth all this trouble. Yeah, when things are good, they’re amazing. However, when they’re bad...it’s a fucking shit show. It also doesn’t help that hes never been in a relationship. However, the part of you that’s scared isn’t louder than the part of you that’s pathetically in love with him.
God, please let this trip go well.
**
“Drysdale can’t seem to keep his eyes off of you,” Daisy smirked as she leaned against your desk.
You looked over to see Ransom sitting on top of his desk, eyes on you like a hawk, as Jack going on about something Ransom clearly didn’t give a shit about, “God, please no.”
“He wants to fuck you so bad,” she scoffed.
“I highly doubt that. He probably heard about my shit show of a birthday party and is silently judging me,” you muttered as you slouched down in your seat.
“Yeah, what the fuck was your Mom on? Holy shit!”
“About 7 shots of Jägermeister, some of her infamous “happy pills”, and her catching my Father fucking the caterer.”
“For fucks sake, your parents are a fucking shit show.”
“I wasn’t expecting them to be perfect, because they’re my parents, but I didn’t expect it to get that bad. Jesus, she almost set the fucking house on fire!”
“Fuck that shit, she almost drowned herself in the pool. What did your Grandmother say?”
“Oh, she’s seething mad. I’ve never heard my her yell before, and it was terrifying.”
“Did she at least yell at your Dad?”
“Nope. My Mother knows how my Father, and she needs to learn how to act accordingly.”
“How is it that your Grandmother is worse than your Mom?”
“As if I know,” you scowled as Jennie Taggs made her way in front of your desk, arms crossed and an evil little smile on her face.
Great.
“Your Mom put on quite the show on Saturday,” she remarked as she flipped her perfect blonde hair to the side.
“Fuck off, Jennie.”
“The speech she made about your dad being a cheating piece of shit while standing on the table? Truly amazing,” she laughed.
You hadn’t even noticed that Ransom had made his way over to the little spectacle.
“Hey Jen, how much longer till your dumbass Dad gets out of jail for money laundering?” you faintly heard him ask before he casually walked out of the classroom.
Wait...what?
“That’s hilarious,” Daisy laughed, pulling you somewhat back to consciousness.
“Shut the fuck up, Daisy. Everyone knows you’re a whore.”
“Great come back there, Jen.”
“Isn’t that what you let Mr. Smotts do? Cum on your back?”
“Yeah, I was practicing for when I go see your Father for a conjugal visit. Don’t wanna end up like your old babysitter now do we?”
“Fucking bitch!” Jennie started to sob as she ran off.
“Don’t you dare go after her,” Daisy snapped as she pushed you back down in your seat.
“That was too far-”
“It’s what she fucking deserved, stupid fucking bitch. She needs to be happy that only my words hurt her.”
“Did Ransom say...wait, you slept with Mr. Smotts?”
“No, he slipped his hand up skirt while I was standing in their kitchen, his wife came in just as I slapped his hand away, and she told everyone that I was trying to seduce her husband, which of course turned into I fucked her husband, and now the story just lives a life of it’s own,” she shrugged. “My Dad kicked his ass, so I don’t care.”
“That’s so fucked-”
“Hey, you okay?” Ransom asks, pulling you out of your memory.
“Huh? Yeah no, I’m fine,” you smile softly as he gets in the tub with you.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?”
“Just a memory.”
“Of?”
“When you defended me against Jennie.”
“God, she’s such a bitch,” he scowls and you giggle softly. “What brought on the memory?”
“I’ve just been thinking about a lot of things since we got here. You brought me to London, got us this amazing suite, you’ve been amazing-”
“But you’re still weighing your options.”
“I’m not weighing my options, Ransom. I love you and yes, you are good to me, but you’re terrible to other people and you’ve done terrible things.”
“I haven’t done them to you.”
“That’s not how this works and you know that.”
“Fuck everyone else! It’s only about you and me-”
“Ransom-”
“If I’m so terrible, why do you stay?”
“Because I love you.”
“Yeah? What do you love about me?” he asks seductively, tone dropping as spreads your legs open and pulls you close.
“Ransom-”
“C’mon baby,” he coos, placing you on his lap so you’re straddling him, “I wanna hear all of the things you love about me,” he encourages as a he starts to tease your clit with his thumb.
“I love the way you take care of me,” you sigh, keeping eye-contact with him as you try and hang on.
“Yeah? What else baby?”
“I love the...the way you hold me, how you let me in and get to know you, the way...God, Ransom!”
“C’mon baby,” he whispers as his lips ghost along the collar of your neck, “keep going.”
“How dedicated you are to the publishing company, the way you’re always surprising me with flowers, the fact that you...oh, I’m so fucking close, please!”
“Tell me more, Sweet Thing.”
“Fuck! You’re so...you’re so caring, funny, s-smart, honest-t, you listen t-to me, only feel whole when...aht!”
“You only feel whole when what?”
“When I-I’m with you! Jesus, please!”
“Cum for me, baby,” he tells you softly and it’s all you need to be sent over the edge.
You grip the side of the bathtub, trying to ride out your high against his thumb, but it’s not enough and you need more.
“We should get ready to go to dinner, baby.”
“I don’t want dinner, I want you.”
“Sweet Thing-”
“Feels like you need me too,” you moan as you dip your hand in the water and start to stroke him.
“Always so needy,” he groans. “Fuck it, this pussy is my favorite meal anyway.”
This is how most of your talks have been ending since you both got to London. No, it’s not healthy, but it’s not like you can ever get your body to listen to you. That’s why you stayed away from him for a week.
“Ransom! The Ritz?! Are you insane?!”
“Had to make sure I made this trip worth your while.”
“Ransom this is too much!”
“Hush,” he smiled as you both reached the front desk.
“Welcome to the Ritz,” the concierge smiled, “checking in or checking out?”
“In. Drysdale, Ransom,” Ransom said nonchalantly as he took out his card. You can tell that he’s going to toss the card, but one look at the stern scowl on his face has him rolling his eyes and handing the gentleman his card. “Have the changes I asked for been made?”
“Yes sir, early this morning. Your bags are being taken up now and everything is all set up and taken care of,” the man smiled politely as he handed Ransom back his card.
“Great, we’ll be back in a bit.”
“Ransom, what are-”
“Lets go,” he whispered with a mischievous smile before he took your hand and led you out of the luxurious hotel.
“Ransom, how do you have something planned already?! We just got here,” you laughed in pure disbelief.
“I know what my Sweet Thing likes, and I know you’re way too wired to sleep,” he smirked before turning his attention to the bell boy “Drysdale, there’s supposed to be a car-”
“Of course, Mr. Drysdale, I’ll grab it for you right now,” the bell boy smiled before he ran off.
“Why is everyone afraid of you? Ransom-”
“The Thrombey name is worldwide, babe. When I called and said who I am, everything I wanted was made available to me.”
“This had to have been a fortune!”
“Nothing is too much for you,” he smiled as a red classic Ford Mustang Convertible pulled up, with champagne flutes filled in the console.
“Ransom...this is...”
“C’mon, I’ve got a few surprises for you before dinner,” he smirked before he pulled you close and kissed you passionately.
The entire drive felt like a dream, and you felt as if you were in a movie. Yeah, you knew that he’d been paying a lot of attention to for a while, but how much did he know, and how did he know it? You probably should’ve been worried about how he knew so much, but you couldn’t bring yourself to worry or care.
“Ransom...” you gasped as he pulled up the Royal Botanical Gardens.
“Your obsession with flowers and gardening made this particularly easy,” he laughed as he pulled into the parking lot.
“You didn’t have to-”
“I wanted to.”
“Why are you like this?”
“Because I love you,” he replied simply with a shrug, as if it were something you should’ve known already.
You were still perplexed.
The entire time you two were there, you looked around in pure amazement. It’s not like you’d never been to a garden before, but this was more beautiful than anything you’d ever seen. You’d promised yourself you take yourself on a trip around Europe when you finished with college, but you could never find the time. Then, when you married Jack, you told him that you wanted to go to London and explore everything you could, but he had no interest in that.
“Ransom! How can you be on your phone at a time like this?! This place is amazing! Put your phone away, work can wait!”
“Yes ma’am,” he smirked as put his phone away and took your hand in his, “anything you say.”
“Thank you for this, truly. Everything is so beautiful and I’m so fucking happy. I love this. I love you.”
“I’d do anything to see you smile,” he promised softly as he cupped your face, “anything at all.”
As always when he kisses you, felt your knees go weak and you held on to him for support.You swear you’ll never get used to his kisses.
“We’re just getting started,” he smiled once you two broken apart.
“There’s more?! Babe, this is more than enough-”
“Not even close,” he laughed as he took your hand in his and resumed walking the trail you two were on.
After dragging you away from the botanical garden, Ransom surprised you with a trip to the Natural History Museum (which took up most of your time because the place is huge), which was followed by him taking you shopping for like figurines and antiques, then a trip to the theater.
“What are you doing in there? We’re gonna be late for dinner,” he laughed as you applied your last bit of makeup.
You put a few loose curls in your hair and put it in a half pony tail, tying it up with a burgundy ribbon to match your dress. Since Ransom wouldn’t tell you where the hell he was taking you, you had no idea what to do.
‘Just look nice’ is all he told you.
Knowing Ransom, it wasn’t going to be some hole-in-the-wall type of deal, so put on one of your fancier outfits. Nothing too crazy, but it was definitely something you wouldn’t wear on a night out with Daisy.
“I just wanna make sure I look good for you!”
“You always look perfect, now come on.”
“So pushy!”
“You’ll thank me when we get there, lets go!” he sighed, and you knew he rolled his eyes.
“Yeah yeah, is this okay?” you asked you stepped out of the bathroom and put on your heels into your heels.
When he didn’t say anything, you got nervous and looked up only to see him staring at you with a look of pure ‘awe’.
“What? What’s wrong? Is it too much? I have another-”
“How do you always manage to look so damn perfect all the time?”
“You’re so funny.”
“I mean it. You will always be the most gorgeous woman in the world to me.”
“Ransom,” you smiled shyly as you quickly looked away.
“C’mon, lets go.”
Ransom held your hand for the entire drive, glancing over at you and smiling at you every so often, you it only made more butterflies appear in your stomach on top of the ones that were already there.
“Jesus Ransom!” you exclaimed as he pulled up to the restaurant and he snorted, “how much money did you spend on this trip, exactly?!”
“I can afford it,” he smirked as he opened his door and got out, quickly making his way to your side and opening your door for you, “now, lets fucking eat.”
As you sat down, you couldn’t stop looking around the restaurant. It wasn’t anything too fancy, but you knew he was gonna spend a pretty penny.
“Hey, what’s going on with you?” Ransom laughed, pulling you out of your thoughts as the waiter walked away.
“I’m sorry, did I miss something?”
“Yeah, the waiter came over and took our drink order. I got you Merlot. Are you alright?”
“Yeah no, I am! Everything is perfect,” you smiled at him.
“But?”
“This is just so much and it’s only our first day. No ones ever done anything like this for me before. Not even close.”
“What Jack didn’t take you away on trips?”
“You know he didn’t,” you scowled. “Did you pull these tricks with Marta too?”
“One, this isn’t a trick. I love you and I want to spoil you, because it’s what you deserve and the least I can do. Two, I barely took Marta out of the state, you think I took her of the country?” he scoffed as the drinks arrived.
“Ransom!”
“What?”
“Do you two need more time deciding on what you would like to order?” the waiter asked nervously.
“Yes please,” you smiled sweetly towards the waiter before your gaze fell back on Ransom and your scowl returned.
“I don’t know why you’re looking at me like that,” he shrugged as he reached for his rye and took a drink from it.
“How can you be so sweet, warm, and loving with me, and so cruel to everyone else? Like they mean nothing to you?”
“Because they don’t mean anything to me.”
“But I’m supposed to believe that it’s different with me?”
“I’m doing my best to show you that-”
“Marta was in love with you, Ransom. You broke her heart just so you could get back your cut of the inheritance and then some. You pursued me all over a bet-”
“I didn’t take the money-”
“Be that as it may, you still made the bet in the first damn place. You want me to believe you, and you don’t know how badly I want to, but you treat people as if they’re trinkets.”
“I’ve never treated you that way. Yes, I am an asshole that’s not lost on anyone, least of all me, but I do love you, Y/N. You think I’m doing all of this for just sex? You and I both know I can fuck whoever I want without even leaving my house. You think I’d spend all of this money just get back at Jack? You think I would stop sleeping around just to toy with you? I have never put this much energy or effort into anything. Why? Because what’s the fucking point? If I hadn’t been so damn scared in the past, I would’ve made a move years ago, but I didn’t and that’s on me. However, I’m trying now. I’m doing my best to show you that I am serious. Do I strike you the kind of guy who holds people when they cry? Do I strike you as the type of guy who deals with crying at all? You are all I think, all I dream about, and all I have ever wanted and more. I know I don’t deserve you, okay? Why do you think I kept my mouth shut at your wedding? I know you deserve better than me, but now I’ve had you. I’ve spent time in your arms, I’ve woken up next to you, I’ve made love to you. I could barely breathe around you before, but now I fee like I can’t breathe until I’m around you. You have consumed every part of my life, your air in my lungs, and every other sappy and romantic thing you can think of. I am doing my best to show you that you are everything to me,” he finished with a heavy sigh. “I know I’ve never been in a real relationship before and I know that when it comes to being truthful and having good intentions, my track record is shit, but with the exception of the bet, I’ve never lied to you. There were multiple times that it would’ve been in my best interest, but I’ve always told you the truth. I’ve done my best to be patient, watch my temper, and be more understanding. Waiting for you has been one of the hardest things that I’ve ever done and is insanely infuriating, but it’s not about me. I hurt you, I betrayed your trust , and now I have to wait and that’s what I’m doing. No, my love isn’t perfect, but it’s genuine and real,” he finished softly before he took a sup of his rye and kept your eyes on the menu and wiped your tears away.
“Are you two ready to order?” the waiter asked again, timidly.
“She’ll have the Langoustine tortellini to start and the United Kingdom CITE de KöD for her main. I’ll have beef carpaccio to start and the Japan wagyu for my main. We’ll also take another round of drinks.”
“Coming right up,” the waiter smiled with a nod before walking off.
“How did you...you didn’t even look at the menu?”
“I looked at it before I made a reservation.”
“How did you know what I wanted?”
“Because I know you,” he smiled with a wink.
The rest of dinner went perfectly enough: he asked you what part of the day you enjoyed the best, what you’re looking forward to, what you wanna do, and if you had any issues with your food. You tried to ask him what he wanted to do, but he only responded with:
“This trip is all about you, babe.”
Of course, when the check came, he already had his card ready because he knew you were gonna try and pay for it.
“You’re not as slick as you’d like to think you are,” he laughed as you two made your way back to the car.
“Ya can’t blame a girl for trying.”
The entire drive back, he had that same smile on his face that he had when he drove you two to the restaurant. He looked so content and happy and it filled your heart with so much happiness. It never left your mind how much you shouldn’t be with Ransom, but the heart wants what it wants.
“You’re the one who wanted to watch this damn movie, get your ass in here!” Ransom called from the bedroom.
The second you two got back to the hotel room, you raced to the bathroom and told Ransom that you were in a rush to get all of your makeup off, but that’s not what you had in mind at all.
“I’ll be in there in a second, this mascara is a bitch to get off.”
“I don’t know why you put makeup on at all, you don’t need it.”
“Aren’t you just a big softie?”
“Yeah whatever, just get your ass back in here,” he muttered and you giggled.
You were all set to go back in there when your phone buzzed. It was an Instagram notification from Ransom. He’d tagged you in something. It didn’t take much for your curiosity to win and you were instantly unlocking your phone and checking to see what it was.
RanDry88: The only person worth giving a fuck about in this shit storm we call life.
All the times you thought he’d been on his phone working, he’d been secretly taking photos of you, and for him to post you like it was nothing, with that as his caption, well... if you were smitten before, you sure as shit didn’t know what to call yourself at that point.
“What the hell is this movie even about, Sweet Thing? I read the info thing and-fuck,” he mumbled as you walked on in black heels to match the black lace lingerie you were wearing.
“Today has been the best day, and it was only the first one, daddy,” you told him seductively as you crawled onto the bed. “You did all this just to make me happy?” you asked as you straddled him, and he reached out to touch you.
“I’d do anything to make you happy, Sweet Thing,” he breathed out as you grabbed his hand and slowly guided it down from your tits to your clothed and soaked pussy. “Sweetheart-”
“Do you really love me, daddy?” you asked as you used your free hand to pull the flimsy material to the side.
“More than I’ve ever loved anything or anyone in this world...fuck, baby!”
“Take these two fingers and show me,” you demanded as you grabbed two of his fingers and slowly slid yourself down on them.
“Oh my God.”
“Feel how much I love you? How much I need you?”
“Greediest little cunt,” he husked as he picked up his pace.
“Tsk tsk, no daddy. You said this trip is all about me and, right now, I want you to take it slow. I’m in control right now,” you told him softly as you slowly started to ride his fingers.
“Holy shit!” he groaned as he clenched his eyes shut.
“Focus on me, daddy. You wanna fuck this tight little pussy? Your tight little pussy?”
“You can’t feel how bad I want it?”
“I want to hear you say it.”
“I need it, sweetheart. Need you. I wanna bury myself deep inside you every night for the rest of my life.”
Once he curled his fingers inside of you, you threw your head back and moaned, “I’ve never loved someone this much. Never...thought you could love me like...oh! Baby, that’s it!”
“You’re a fucking dream, did you know that? Everything about you is fucking perfect!”
“Shiiit!!” you screamed out as you came hard.
“Fucks sake,” he growled as you rode his fingers through your high. “I need you, please.”
“What do you need, daddy?” you breathed as you finally came back to reality.
“To get lost in you for as long as you’ll let me.”
You didn’t say a word. You lifted yourself just a little so he could remove his fingers and you slipped them into his mouth, before you started to get to work on unbuckling his pants and working his pants and briefs off just enough to expose what you both truly wanted to take care of.
“So hard for me, daddy,” you whimpered as you ground your hips against his. “Tell me how I good I taste,” you begged, as you removed his fingers from his mouth and he let out a pathetic whimper.
“Like a fucking dream!”
“You wanna get lost deep inside me?”
“Please!” he rasped as he gripped your hips and tried to hold on.
You said nothing. Instead, you just slid yourself down on his cock and you both let out a satisfied groan.
“Fuck, I love seeing you like this, Sweet Thing.”
“Like what, daddy?” you mewled, clawing at his clothed chest as you lulled your head back and started to pick up your pace.
“In con...control, taking what you want...what you need,” he moaned as one of his hands reached up into your hair and easily untied the bow in it, unwinding the rest of your hair as it cascaded down your face. “So fucking sexy,” he praised as his soft hands caressed your cheeks before they journeyed downward, exploring and caressing the shape of you. “I love you!” “I lov...I love you too! Oh my..fuck! Daddy! So close! Gonna cum so fucking hard for you!”
“Please!”
“Aht...shit!” you screamed as you squirted on his cock, trying to keep yourself somewhat upright as you rode out your orgasm.
“Never knew you could be this controlling,” Ransom chuckled with a smirk once your breathing was even again.
“Did you like it, daddy?”
“I fucking loved it, Sweet Thing.”
“I think you should show me how much.”
“We’ll take as much time as you time as you need to get the fucking point,” he promised as he flipped you onto your back.
Yes, there were days of the trip that were perfect and ended up with you two tangled up in the sheets. However, there were also days that you two ended up with you two tangled up in the sheets out of sheer anger and frustration.
“Oh God, Ransom,” you moaned with your eyes still shut as your hand gripped his hair tight.
“Time to for you to wake up,” he mumbled against your clit before he pulled on it with his lips.
“Fuck! Feels so good...shit!”
He slid two fingers into your soaked and, as you arched your back, you wondered what you did so right to receive a wake up call like that.
What you did so right to have Hugh Ransom Drysdale so in love with you.
“Fuck, just like that...aht! Fuck!” you cried out, grinding yourself against his face while your other hand fisted the sheets.
Your pathetic pleas and cries only made Ransom pick up his pace, desperate to taste you. Once he added another finger, you saw stars.
“Fuck!”
The vibration from Ransom’s hum of satisfaction almost sent you into another orgasm.
“Fuck me,” you demanded once he finished cleaning up between your legs.
“Daddy ‘ll take care of you later, Sweet Thing. We have to go,” he groaned, looking you over.
“Please-”
“Don’t be a brat. I want fuck you until you can’t walk, but we have a flight to catch.”
“A fl-WHAT DID YOU DO?!” you exclaimed as you sat up and he started laughing.
“Get up.”
“Ransom-”
“We’ll be back before dinner.”
“Ransom-”
“No more questions. Get up, join me in the shower, and lets go,” he smirked as he walked towards the bathroom. When he didn’t hear you following after him, he threw his briefs at you, “lets go, Y/N!”
You tried to question him during the shower, but he’d just kiss you to shut you up. Every time you’d try to take it further, he’d just pin your hands against the shower wall, and tell you:
“be a good little girl, or you’re in for a long night with daddy.”
Torturous asshole knew exactly what he was doing, but you decided that it would be in your best interest to obey.
For the time being.
“Do you still speak a hundred different languages for no reason?” Ransom asked as got to the airport.
“I didn’t learn them for no reason. It’s rude to go to another country and expect them to speak English.”
“English is the number one language in the world, and you didn’t answer my question.”
“It’s still rude, Ransom, and yes, I do.”
“Good, it’ll come in handy in Italy.”
“ITALY?!”
“I really do enjoy exciting you,” he chuckled as he pulled into a parking space.
“Ransom-”
“Flight to catch, lets go.”
Everything was fine initially. You practically bouncing the entire flight, Ransom was happy because you were happy, and you two continued to learn more about each other. When the plane landed, you practically ran off and Ransom had to keep his arm around your waist to keep you close.
Once again, he surprised with just how much he’d been paying attention.
“You’re taking me shopping in Milan?!”
“Shopping, site seeing, and lunch.”
“You have to let me get you something!”
“What did I tell you our first night in London?”
“Baby-”
“You have all this money and you spend it on everyone else, I know for a fact that Jack never spoiled you, and your parents treat you like you’re a fucking show pony. Yeah, Daisy takes you on trips, but I know you don’t let her spoil you-”
“Who spoils you?”
“You love me and that’s all I need.”
“You’re working hard for that yes, Drysdale,” you teased as you two walked out of the airport hand-in-hand.
Everything was perfect up until lunch.
“I don’t give a fuck that Walt told you to call me! Did I not leave specific instructions to not call me until I get back?...I don’t care that he threatened to fire you! Besides, it’s not bad enough that you called, but you called with bad news!...It’s not hard for deadlines to be met, so what the hell is wrong with everyone that works for this company?! Ya know, you don’t have to worry about Walt firing you, cause I’m doing it now. Pack up your desk and good luck finding a job somewhere else, especially if you try to use me a fucking reference!” Ransom snapped before he hung up. “Everyone is a fucking idiot, I swear to God...oh, why are you looking at me like that?!”
“Because you’re being an asshole?”
“How am I being an asshole?! I told him-”
“Walt threatened to fire him! He was scared-”
“I told everyone not to call me until I got back. It’s not my fault that Walt is incompetent!”
“Okay, whatever,” you muttered as you reached for your glass of champagne.
“How are you mad at me right now?!”
“Don’t act like you don’t know you’re being a complete and total dick right now, Ransom.”
“It’s my company-”
“That you weaseled your way into.”
“Don’t be a bitch about it, Y/N.”
“Okay, we’re done talking about this.”
“Fine.”
“Fine.”
You two barely spoke to each other for the rest of the time spent in Milan, you refused to let him touch you on the flight back, and the second you two got back to the hotel room, you stormed off into the living area. By the time he was ready for dinner, you were in your pyjamas.
“You know you aren’t going to bed. It’s too early,” he sighed as he walked into the bedroom.
“I don’t know what else there is to do,” you shrugged as you continued to flip through channels.
“You need to eat dinner and I made reservation at-”
“Well, since I’m a bitch and you’re an asshole-”
“You know I didn’t mean it-”
“Well, I meant it about you being an asshole!”
“Stop it, okay? I’m sorry. I ruined the trip and I know you’re right, okay?”
“As long as you fucking know. I don’t want to have dinner with you anyway.”
“Yes you do.”
“No, I actually don’t.”
“Stop being so fucking stubborn,” he muttered as he made his way over to the side of bed you were on and sat next to you. “I really am sorry,” he said sincerely as he scooped you onto his lap.
“You can’t keep letting your temper get the best of you.”
“I’m working on it, okay? This is the first time I’ve ever had someone in my life to truly keep me in check.”
“You tell me you love me and then-”
“I do love you. I was just irritated. I was annoyed, because I know Walt did that on purpose. The fact that I run the company infuriates him, and the fact that Marta just handed it over to me only makes it that much worse. I shouldn’t have lashed out at you and I didn’t mean to. I really am sorry,” he promised sincerely.
“You’re gonna have to take me back to Milan to make it up to me,” you pouted and he chuckled.
“Just tell me when and we’ll go.”
“You can’t keep acting like this, Ransom. I know things were tough, but that’s no reason for you to take it out on everyone else. At some point, you really have to grow up.”
“I know, I know. I’m working on it. I’ll send the kid a text and let him know that he can have his job back if he wants it, and I’ll even apologize.”
“Don’t just tell me what I wanna hear.”
“I know better than to ever do that,” he scoffed as he kissed your forehead. “I know it means a lot to you, so-”
“It should mean a lot to you too.”
“People don’t matter to me-”
“I matter to you-”
“Which is why I’m trying-”
“I can’t be the only person who means something to you. I can’t be the only reason you try.”
“You can’t expect change over night. I’m trying and I need you to be patient with me.”
“I’m trying. I know that you’re capable of being a great guy-”
“But you also have to accept that there are some parts of me you’re just not going to like.”
“That sounds a lot like you coping out of trying.”
“No, that’s me being honest about the fact that there are certain things that I just can’t change. I’ve been this way for a while, and while it’s not impossible for me to change certain things, there are things that are just embedded in my DNA. You didn’t fall in love with me because I’m some boy scout. Fuck, I told you I murdered Fran and you’re still here. No, I don’t plan on planning on murdering anyone else, as long as they’re good to you, but we both know there’s a dark side to me that will always be there. You have to accept that part of me.”
You hated that he had a point.
“Ransom, I can accept a certain amount of darkness, but it can’t all be dark. You’ve gotta get your shit together.”
“And you’ve gotta accept that this isn’t some cookie cutter relationship. You have to accept that there are parts of me that you aren’t always going to like.”
“Ransom-”
“You know who and how I am. There can be light, but you know that there can be dark. I’ll do my best to be my best for you, but it’s not always going to be sunshine and rainbows. I’m an asshole, I’m unforgiving, and I’m unapologetic. You’re the only person I want to work on those things for and I don’t feel the need, right now, to spread that feeling of understanding to anyone else.”
“Ransom-”
“You can’t force me to change over night, Y/N. It’s just not gonna work. I love you, but I’m not God and I’m nowhere near attempting to be perfect. I love you and I want to be with you, but you have to accept that I come with flaws.”
You took a moment to think all of it over before you responded with, “I can’t tell you that I’m willing to accept all of the bad that comes with a little bit of good, but I want to try. I love you too much to not try.”
“So...are you finally saying-”
“No,” you quickly interjected with a laugh, “especially after today, you don’t get to call me your girlfriend so easily, but I am willing to explore this further.”
“I’ll take what I can get,” he sighed as he kissed your shoulder.
“I’ll get dressed and we can go-”
“Not really in the mood to go out right now,” he murmured against your shoulder, as his hand traveled up your night shirt and pinched your nipple.
“Ransom,” you gasped, arching your back as you leaned against him.
“I honestly don’t give a fuck about making anyone else mad or upset, but you...will you let daddy show you just how sorry he is?”
“You can do whatever you want,” you whimpered as he ripped your panties off.
No matter how the days went, they always ended the same: Ransom deep inside of you, telling you just how much he loves and needs you.
Tonight is no different.
“Come on, Sweet Thing! I know this cunt can give me your sweet cream one more time!”
The best you can respond with is a garbled moaned as you strangle your hands strangle the pillows.
“Aw, did daddy fuck his little girl stupid?” he chuckles, slapping your ass hard while he continues to fuck into you relentlessly from behind. “Fucked so good you went numb?”
Ransom wasted no time getting you from the bathtub to the bed, and you don’t even remember how long ago that was, all you know is that you feel like you’re in heaven.
“Give it to me! Be the perfect little whore and give your daddy what wants,” he growls as he reaches around and grips your throat.
“Fuck!”
“Feel good? Having me deep inside you with this fat cock?”
“Too...too-”
“So fucked out,” he chuckles darkly as he grips your hair, puling you up right, “daddy wants another orgasm,” he whispers harshly in your ear.
“B-bite...please...my neck!”
“Anything for my sweet girl,” he husks before biting down on your sweet spot.
“FUCKING SHIT!” you scream out, squirting hard as you reach around and grip his waist.
Ransom follows with a loud, “FUCK!” as he lets go of your hair and you fall onto the bed unceremoniously. “Shit! I’m sorry-”
“I’m perfect,” you mumble, gripping a pillow as you try to find your way through the euphoric cloud he put you in.
“You promise?”
“You’ve been rougher than that, I’m fine,” you giggle softly. “I’m more than sure we missed our reservation though,” you whine as he pulls out.
“I’ll order up room service and make it up to you tomorrow,” he promises as he lays down next to you.
“You don’t have to make anything up to me.”
“You’ll see tomorrow,” he promises before kissing the top of your forehead. “I love you.”
“I love you.”
“You better. Now,” he starts as he pulls his phone off the nightstand and clicking through a few things, “what overpriced meal do you want for dinner?” he mutters as you burst out laugh and cuddle up to him.
Sometimes, just fucking sometimes, Hugh Ransom Drysdale is a dream come true.
**
“You haven’t said shit for almost the entire train ride,” Ransom laughs as you continue to look out the window.
“You’re taking me to Paris! Ransom!”
“It’s our last day, I wanted to make sure you enjoyed it,” he shrugs as he wraps an arm around your shoulder.
“I’ve loved this entire trip, you didn’t have to do this”
“I fucked up Milan.”
“You already said you’re gonna make it up to me.”
“Count this as part of that.”
“Ransom-”
“Just let me love and spoil you,” he interrupts with a laugh before kissing you passionately. “I love you.”
“I love you.”
God, you’re living an absolute dream right now.
Shopping in Paris is another thing you’d dreamed of, and promised yourself you’d do. Not even for anything selfish, it’s just something you’ve always wanted to do. Now, you’re here with Ransom and nothing is off limits.
“Ransom, no! Put it back!” you whisper as Ransom picks up a $1,500 dress.
“Try it on,” he laughs.
“No! That’s way too much for a dress!”
“You want it.”
“I don’t need it!”
“You can either try it on to make sure it fits, or I’ll just sent to your house and you can deal with alterations in Massachusetts.”
“Ransom-”
“It’s okay to have nice things, Sweet Thing.”
“Not this nice!”
“Try it on,” he laughs, handing you the dress.
“You’re letting me buy you an overpriced watch or something before we leave Paris,” you mutter, begrudgingly taking the dress and walking off in the direction of the dressing rooms.
As get out of your clothes, and carefully slip into the dress, you think about the last two weeks. Maybe being with Ransom won’t be the worst thing. Yes, he’s definitely going to have to tone it down on the gifts, but he’s not completely terrible. Besides, unlike Jack, he’s not hiding anything from you. Hes laid everything out in front of you; the good and the bad. Plus, it’s not like he hasn’t told you that he’ll try, and you can’t help but believe him. No, he isn’t some knight in shining armor, but you knew that when all of this started what feels like forever ago.
“Well, what do you think of it?” Ransom asks, coming into the dressing room.
“You can’t be in here!” you whisper yell and he chuckles.
“I think I want to rip it off of you and fuck you senseless.”
“Ransom!”
“I’ll behave...for now. Do you like it?”
“You don’t think it’s too tight?”
“It’s making my pants too tight.”
“Stop,” you laugh as you playfully shove him. “I like it. I’m only wearing it when I’m with you though.”
“I’m only letting you wear it when I’m with you. Now, get changed so I can spoil you some more.”
“You spoil me too much.”
“Get used to it, Sweet Thing.”
“We’re setting a spending cap for you. Now, get out so I can change.”
“I’m here to make sure no one gets in,” he smirks.
“Ransom.”
“Be a good girl and change so we can go.”
You swear there’s a raging devil in him at all times.
“Fuck,” he sighs once he sees you in your red lace lingerie set, his fingers ghosting along your torso.
“Don’t start,” you whimper pathetically, not even believing yourself, “you just had me this morning.”
“As if once a day is enough,” he murmurs as he pulls you close, “I always want you.”
“Ransom-”
“Like I said, I’ll be good...for now,” he tells you with a foreboding tone as he let go of you.
“What do you have planned?” you ask as you quickly pull your shorts up. “Don’t worry about it. Now, hurry up and finish getting dressed so we can go. Daddy has a lot he wants to get done for his little princess today.”
“You are nothing but trouble.”
“And you love it,” he smirks, biting his bottom lip as you pull your tank top on. “Should’ve just kept you in bed all day.”
“Stop being a menace,” you whine and he laughs. “Thank you, Ransom. For all of this. These last two weeks have been perfect, and while I’m not used to anything on this scale, it’s been amazing. I love you so much and I’m so happy.”
“I wanna make you this happy forever.”
“Maybe you’ll get the chance to,” you smile as you grab the dress and make your way out.
You told Ransom that you were happy with just the dress, but he still insisted upon getting you a diamond bracelet and diamond choker to match. When you try to protest, he basically ignores you as he put his card on the table and tells you to ‘just accept it’.
It’s not like you have much of a choice.
“Okay, you’ve gotta explain it to me,” Ransom sighs as you two sit in the back of the car service her ordered.
“Explain what?”
“You have all this money and never spend it on yourself.”
“Oh,” you giggle as you lay your head on his shoulder, “I don’t know, I just don’t see the need to, I guess.”
“No, I know you too well. What’s the reason?”
“It’s just...no one we know is happy. The happiest person I know is Daisy, which is really fucking sad, because she’s just as sad and depressed as I am. She just drinks and fucks it away. I’m happiest when I’m helping others. The homeless, charities, soup kitchens...I don’t see the point in having a bunch of materialistic things when it doesn’t bring me joy. I have everything I need, so what’s the point of buying things I want?”
“You can still take yourself on trips and-”
“That would make me feel too much like my mom,” you scoff, “that’s how she dealt with everything. My Father cheating? A trip. My Grandmother giving her shit? A trip. Someone dying? A trip. Her response to everything is a trip, and I wouldn’t see a problem with it, except that with every trip, she became less and less of a Mom. My mom. She just became a shell of herself. After my infamous 16th birthday party, she took another trip. It lasted for two months. She left me alone to deal with everything and I hadn’t even done anything wrong. So no, I can’t associate trips with “self-care”, I associate them with trauma,” you laugh humorlessly.
“You came on this one.”
“Ah, but there are multiple factors to this one, Mr. Drysdale,” you smirk. “One, I would’ve felt terrible not going, because you planned all of this, so I already knew you’d spent entirely too much money on me. Two, I’m not alone. I’m with you and I love you. Three, I didn’t come along because I’m sad or running from something. If anything, I’m trying to figure us out and I’m happy to be here with you.”
“You are?”
“Ransom, I may be soft, but I still have a mind of my own. If I didn’t wanna be here, I wouldn’t be.”
“You love me enough to give me a real chance?”
“Unfortunately, yes.”
“Does that mean...?”
“It means that things are leaning more towards your favor than not, but we’ll wait until we get home.”
“That sounds promising.”
“Don’t get too far ahead of yourself,” you laugh as he kisses your forehead. “If I weren’t so damn happy, this would remind me of the time when my Mother left because-”
“We are here,” the driver announces as he comes to a stop and smiles at the both of you. “Such a young and lovely couple, I wish you all the best!”
“Thank you, we need all the help we can get,” you laugh with a smile, opening the door and getting out before Ransom has a chance to give some snarky response.
“Always stealing my thunder,” Ransom mutters as he follows your lead.
“I’m making the world a better pl-THE PALACE OF VERSAILLES?!”
“The trip wouldn’t have been complete without it.”
“Ransom-”
“It’s a tour, Sweet Thing. Everyone does it.”
“Honey-”
“Just enjoy it,” he laughs, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and dipping down to kiss your temple.
It’s not like it was hard.
You barely pay any attention to Ransom as practically skip from room to room, taking in the history of each room, and Ransom is fine to let you do that until hes had enough.
“What are you doing?!” you whisper yell as Ransom pulls you into a random room.
They’re all random since you’ve never been there.
“I told you that I’d behave until a certain point,” he smirks, kicking the door closed before he pinned you against the wall.
He would kick something in the fucking Palace of Versailles.
“Ransom-”
“I thought you loved making historical moments,” he chuckles as he undoes your shorts.
“They’ve probably got security cameras in here! We can’t...oh my GOD!” you mewl as he starts to play with your clit; his thumb being one of the most vicious toys that he uses.
His tongue being number one.
“Oh...fuck!”
“Be quiet or they’ll catch us,” he chuckles before starting to bite and suck on your neck.
“Daddy!” you mewl as softly as you can.
“Want me to make it all better?”
“Please!”
“Remember, Sweet Thing,” he coos as he gets on his knees and rips your panties off, “you gotta be quiet.”
And with that, he dives in like he hasn’t eaten a meal in years.
“Oh...oh shit! Ransom,” you whimper as you look down at him, his eyes telling you just how much he’s getting off on this. How much he needs it.
All he wants is to have the taste of you in his mouth all day, and you’re more than happy to give that to him. Two of his fingers tease your entrance and you do all you can to not scream and beg him to fuck you with them, and the devilish glint in his eyes lets you know just how much he loves how desperate you are to be good for him. When he does finally slide those two fingers in, you bite your bottom lip and clench your eyes shut to keep from yelling. Arching your back, you grip his hair and start grinding yourself almost his face, almost forgetting where you are.
Marie Antoinette would be so proud.
Ransom curls his fingers, finding that spongy spot inside of you that makes you blossom like a flower for him, and you swallow down your moan as you cum hard, trying your hardest to stay upright.
“So worried about security cameras, but you’re givin’ ‘em such a show, Sweet Thing,” Ransom broods darkly as he kisses his way up your body.
“Need it, daddy! Need you,” you whimper as you undo the front of his pants.
“Thought you wanted to be a good little girl?” he husks as he hoists you up and forces your legs around his waist.
“Fuck it,” you gasp as he thrusts himself inside of you.
Ransom is relentless as he fucks you hard and fast, not giving a single fuck if anyone walks in and catches you two.
“Please!,” you sob into his neck as you dig your nails into his shoulders.
“Feels so fucking good every time I’m deep inside you!”
“Daddy please!”
“Do you know how much I fucking love you? I would do anything for you! Anything to see you smile!”
“Aht! Baby...baby...that’s it!” you mewl into his neck before biting it.
“Fuck! The way this pussy squeezes me...give it to me! Want that fucking cream so bad!”
You moan into his neck as you cum hard, silently praying that no one heard you two, as spills his seed into you and fucks you both through your highs.
You really just had sex at the Palace of Versailles.
“You are nothing but trouble, Drysdale” you say with a breathy chuckle as he sets you down.
“Wanted to make sure the trip was historical for you,” he smirks.
“That’s a terrible joke,” you laugh as you lay your head on his shoulder.
“I love you, Y/N. I love you more than I can express.”
“I believe you.”
“I want to be with you. Really be with you. I want more trips with you, I want to come home to you, I want adventures with you...I want everything with you.”
“I know you do.”
“When will you trust me again?”
“It’s not just about trust, Ransom,” you sigh as squat down and pull up your shorts up and pass him your torn panties, “and you know that.”
“I told you that I’ll try.”
“And I told you that I need more time.”
“You know I’m never going to give up,” he mutters as he bends down and pulls up his briefs and shorts, before stuffing your panties into his pocket.
“Yeah, I know,” you laugh, “I won’t keep you in limbo for too much longer, okay? You know I love and want to be with you, I just....”
“Yeah, I know. I know,” he sighs.
“Lets just enjoy our last day, okay?”
“Anything you want,” he smiles at you before kissing you passionately.
“Stop, before you start round two.”
“You don’t know how hard it was for me to not tear that fucking tank top open.”
“Lets go,” you laugh as you lead the way and place your hand on the door.
“Y/N,” Ransom calls as he softly grabs your wrist.
“Yeah babe?”
“I do love you.”
“I love you,” you smile at him, “lets get back out there before we get caught.”
“I’m sure the whole palace heard us,” he smirks and you burst out laughing.
“Lets go, you.”
The rest of the tour is amazing, and judging by some of the looks thrown your way, you’re more than sure that people knew what you and Ransom had been up to. It doesn’t matter though, because the last two weeks have been heaven. Even with some of the arguments, the back and forth, and the fears that live rent free in your head. You’ve never been this happy, and you never thought that, in a million years, Hugh Ransom Drysdale would be the one to make you this happy. You know that things are going to be crazy when you get two get back, and while you’re not looking forward to it, you’re looking forward to Ransom being by your side for all of it.
You’re looking forward to finally letting yourself give him another try.
“Did you enjoy our little get away?” Ransom asks you two make your way down from the Eiffel Tower.
“I’m still trying to believe that all of this is real and not some dream that’s lasted much longer than it’s supposed to.”
“No, it’s very real,” he chuckles as he takes your hand in his. “If you’re so happy, why do you seem so far away?”
“I just...I want to say yes, Ransom. I want to let go of what happened and just start over, and that’s the direction I’m leaning towards but...”
“There’s still the fact that I’m a piece of shit,” he scoffs humorlessly.
“You’re not a piece of shit, Ransom. I never thought that before and I sure as shit don’t believe it now. However, the fact remains that you’ve done things that leave me...afraid. Trusting you...it’s not easy, Ransom. I trusted you before and it blew up in my face, on my fucking birthday, no less.”
“You know how much I want to take that back-”
“But you can’t, Ransom. No matter how much you want to, you can’t. I want to believe everything you say, because I love you more than I can explain, but I can’t. Yes, I believe that you love me and I believe that you want forever with me, but it doesn’t change the fact that you’ll use anyone to get what you want. Including me.”
“I won’t ever do something like that again, and I know-”
“You still did it in the first place, and that’s whats causing the issue. Me wanting to trust and being with you doesn’t cancel out the fact that I know exactly what you did, why you did it, and who you did it to,” you mumble as you two finally reach the last step.
Getting to the bottom of the Eiffel Tower is just as much of a pain in the ass as it is to get to the top.
“I’ll give you all the time you need to make your decision-”
“I don’t want anymore time, Ransom. You are who you are and I didn’t fall in love with you not knowing that. I am in love with you. I am so insanely in love with you and it scares me, because what the fuck am I going to do if you hurt me? If you leave me? I...want my forever to be with you, Ransom. God, I sound like a fucking airhead,” you laugh humorlessly as you grip his hand tighter. “I’ve thought about this so many times, and I keep thinking about all of the good that’s happened verses the bad and...the good outweighs the bad, I guess....I want to be with you. I wanna how the first few weeks go once we get back home, but I want...I want to be with you. Really be with you,” you smile up at him.
In one swift move, he’s picking you up and spinning you around, and you’re laughing into his shoulder and wrapping your arms around him tight.
“I guess it would’ve been more romantic to give this to you at the top of the Eiffel Tower,” he laughs as he sets you down, before digging in his pocket and pulling out a black velvet box.
“Ransom-”
“Relax, I’m not proposing. I didn’t get down on one knee, so I don’t know why you thought that was the case.”
“I don’t believe you’ll get down on one knee to propose.”
“My love for you will help me quiet my ego long enough for me to get down on one knee and propose,” he chuckles as he opens the box.
“Ransom...this is gorgeous,” you gasp and you hold up the sterling silver dragonfly necklace.
“I love you. I’m not easy to love, I’m rough around the edges, and I’m by no means innocent, but I’m all in with you. No lies, no more bets, no cheating, nothing. I want this to work because I love you more than you know and I’m...I’m committed to you. I’m committed to us,” he promises.
You wrap your arms around him and pull him close before getting on your tiptoes, and kissing him passionately.
He makes it so easy to get lost in him and forget. Forget that hell is waiting for you both when you get back to the states, forget that all of this is more complicated than it seems, and forget how scared you are. However, it’s not lost on you that you two are away, and things can easily change once you get home. Which is why you want to wait a few more weeks before you make anything official.
“Lets get back, huh?” he breaths once you two break apart.
“Please.”
The train ride back to London is torturous, because Ransom won’t keep his hands to himself, and you don’t want him to. The second you two are back inside the suite, Ransom is picking you up and carrying you to the bed, and you’re desperately trying to get his clothes off.
You two spend the rest of the evening in bed, making love and getting lost in one another. There’s no ‘daddy’, no slutty nicknames, no degrading, and no teasing. It’s just you and him telling each other just how much you both love and need one another, and how much you both just want each other forever. At some point, he orders room service, but you both only take a few bites of your food before he’s pulling you back into bed.
“We need to pack,” you yawn as you two cuddle up to another, finally ready to call it a night.
“I’ll take care of it, don’t worry about it.”
“What does that even mean?”
“It means that you need to rest and not worry about things that don’t matter.”
“Ransom?”
“Hmm?”
“Tell me you mean it when you tell me you want everything with me forever.”
“I mean it with every inch of my being, and I’m more than happy to spend the rest of my life showing you that.”
“I love you, Ransom.”
“I love you, Sweet Thing,” he tells you softly before kissing your forehead, “get some rest.”
As you drift off to sleep, you hope that the magic you two have found follows you both back to Massachusetts. You hope that you two can make this work for real and make it last.
**
“Why can’t you just stay over?” Ransom whines as he drives to his house. “Because,” you laugh as your phone goes off for the millionth time, “I like my house...Jesus, who knew one picture could get so many likes? I’m turning off my notifications,” you grumble as you fish it out of your purse.
Before you both headed back to the airport, you made a small photo set on your Insta account, with the caption:
Y/N Account Name: Took a little trip to my favorite place with my favorite person :)
Which Daisy was quick to comment with:
YourDadsBestFriend69: You go to Europe and get dicked down once, and I lose my title. This is bullshit.
You’re all set to turn off your notifications when you see that Marta has followed you. You tapped on username, but it was private. However, you did see her holding a small hand in her profile picture.
Did she have a baby?
When you go back to your notifications, her follow isn’t there anymore, which makes you all that much more confused. You let your curiosity get the best of you and go over to Ransom’s page and tapped on the photo set he posted of you.
You look through the very colorful comments until you find what you’re looking for:
M_Cab89: We’ll see if that’s the case when you get back.
Alright, what the fuck is going on?
“Are you listening to me?” Ransom asks, pulling you out of your thoughts.
“Huh? What? No, I’m sorry, what did you say?”
“The car should be delivered in two days.”
“You didn’t have to buy me the car, Ransom,” you laugh with a sigh.
“You like the car and now you’ll have it.”
“You don’t have to buy me everything-”
“We were still on the trip. The trip that I took great joy in spoiling you on. I was happy to do it.”
“You should’ve let me buy you the watch.”
“I have too many watches,” he scoffs as he turns onto his street. “I’ll run inside, grab some clothes, and we’ll head back to your place...awh, what the shit?!” he gripes as he parks his car in his gravel driveway.
Why are Marta and Linda here? Who the hell is that little boy?
“What the fuck is this about?” he mutters, opening his door and getting out before slamming it shut.
Great.
“Ransom, calm down,” you sigh, getting out and following after him.
“It’s bad enough that either one of them is here, but them together? And who the fuck is that little kid?” he growls.
“Ransom, please.”
“What do you want, Mother?” he snaps, malice in his tone as he reaches his doorstep.
There’s no way that is going to end well.
“Don’t speak to me in that tone!”
“You’re at my house-”
“That Harlan got you-”
“What do you want?” he mutters.
“So, it’s true? You’re with her now?” Linda sasses as she looks you over.
“It really doesn’t concern you. What do you-”
“You planned your trip during my birthday, didn’t even bother to call-”
“Why should I? It’s not like you wanted me there anyway-”
“I’m your Mother, you ungrateful little shit!” she interrupts, slapping him hard.
“No!” you snap, standing in front of Ransom, “you don’t get to hit him! I don’t care that he’s your son, you don’t treat him like that! Especially because he’s your son,” you growl, a threatening finger pointed directly at her face.
The shit eating grin that comes to her face makes your stomach churn.
“When I got here, Marta was already here with that little guy. Seems like you can’t keep either of your whores in line.”
There’s no fucking way...
“What are you talking about? I don’t-”
“He’s your son, Ransom,” Marta interjects, stepping aside, so little boy can be seen.
You can’t breathe.
“The fuck he is!”
“Watch your mouth!”
“He’s not my son and this isn’t fucking funny!”
“We can take a test if you want, but he is your son!”
The comment she left under his pictures makes so much sense now.
“Well, I don’t want him! You wait...however many years to tell me about him, and you sure as shit don’t need any money, so why now?!”
“He deserves to know who his Father is, Ransom! He’s a Drysdale and-”
“Watch it,” Ransom warns with a foreboding tone.
You look at him in pure and utter shock. You know that he can be an asshole, but this is just cruel. He has a point though, why did Marta wait until now? There were multiple times to tell Ransom, including when she was pregnant, but she waited till he posted you? Is that why she went on your page? To see if there was something more? To see if we were both serious about each other?
“It’s not enough that you had to take this whore to London and miss my birthday, but now you have a bastard with the help? God, you don’t know how to stop yourself from fucking up, do you?” Linda spits.
This time, you’re the one slapping her while angry tears roll down your cheek, and Linda looks at you in pure shock.
“I’ll press charges!”
“Go ahead,” you mutter before turning and walking away.
“Y/N, please don’t go,” Ransom calls, following after you and grabbing your wrist, and you instantly pull out of his hold. “Sweet Thing-”
“Don’t call me that.”
“Please, lets talk about this!”
“I can’t be here right now, Ransom. I just can’t.”
“Where do you wanna go? We can anywhere you want!”
“I need to get away from you!” you yell, turning to face him for just a brief moment, but it was long enough to see the pain in his eyes.
The universe just couldn’t give you a fucking win, could it?
“Please-”
“I can’t talk to you right now. I have to go. I’ve gotta get the fuck out of here.”
You’re quick to grab your purse and cell phone from his car, before you’re walking off in the direction of your home.
The second you can’t see them anymore, you burst into tears.
You were just too fucking happy. You finally felt comfortable enough to explore things with Ransom, you were so ready to say yes and fully commit, and now there’s all this shit. What the fuck are you supposed to do now? No, he by all means did not have the right response to any of what just took place, but e was caught completely off guard, and it really does seem like Marta did this out of spite.
Linda help a single fucking thing.
You stop in at the liquor store and pick up four bottles of tequila, along with four packs of cigarettes, and completely ignore the stares and whispers that are coming your way.
None of it fucking matters anyway.
As your items are being scanned, only one thought keeps going through your mind: why did you have to fall in love with Hugh Ransom Drysdale?
~~
taglist: @emerald-evans, @maroonsunrise83, @whiskeytangofoxtrot555, @companionjones, @autumnrose40, @fuckingbye, @pono-pura-vida, @nomadstucky, @mazda098, @chemtrails-club, @bree-lyrie
#chris evans character fanfiction#Chris Evans Character#fanfiction#fan fiction#fanfic#fan fic#Knives Out#knives out smut#knives out fanfic#knives out fanfiction#Hugh Drysdale#hugh ransom drysdale#hugh ransom drysdale smut#hugh ransom drysdale x reader#hugh drysdale x reader#Hugh Ransom Drysdale#hugh ransom thrombey#Hugh Ransom Drysdale x you#ransom x reader#ransom smut#ransom thrombey smut#ransom thrombey x you#ransom thrombey x reader#ransom drydale x you#ransom x you#ransom x y/n#ransom drysdale fanfic#ransom drysdale x reader
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Wilhemina Venable x Reader - Who knew?
A/N: Hello everyone 💜 I'm back with another Mina fic. It's inspired by the song ,,Who knew'' from Pink.
tw: angst, sad, very mild mention of drinking and drug using
word count: 3.7k
taglist: (if you wanna be added or taken off, send me a dm or an ask):
@lunaticwhittaker, @billiebeanhoward, @lanawinters-ily,@kenzbro, @minaslittleone,@httpfiftyshadesofgay,@whitelotus00, @ninaahs, @vintagepaulson, @isle-of-earle, @paulsonsratched, @stepintomyworld, @grilledcheeseandguavajelly, @lucyintheskywithxanax ,@fanfics4world, @mymiraclewitch, @hazard-to-myself, @awritersometime
Sighing, you walk down the long corridors of your workplace. Today was unbearable for some reason. You had been an employee of Kineros Robotics for four years now. Sometimes it felt like you only just started there but today it felt like an eternity.
As you walk towards the meeting room, holding a folder in one hand and your coffee cup in the other, hoping the caffeine would help you wake up a little and somehow make this day end faster, you suddenly spot her. Graceful as ever she walked into the meeting room, her cane hitting off the floor hard, echoing through the walls.
You stop for a minute, taking in her beauty. The red hair, the perfect pony tale, the granny glasses that you used to make fun of, her beautiful makeup and the colour purple plastered all over the slightly taller woman. ,,Whats up, seen a ghost?'' one of your male coworkers giggles as he walks past you. You shake your head and roll your eyes before entering the room.
,,Good Morning'' you say as you enter, trying hard not to look at the redhead now sitting at the other end of the room. You take a seat as you wait for the meeting to begin. As per usual, your bosses Jeff and Mutt were late. It annoyed you how they never valued your time, or anyone elses for that matter as you still had a lot of work on your desk. You didn't realize until now that everyone was staring at you and you couldn't figure out the reason why. Just as you tried to speak up, your bosses walked in and the meeting started.
,,How is that project coming along?'' your thoughts are interrupted when one of your bosses addresses you. You swallow the lump in your throat before talking about the current status of the project and what you had worked on so far. You look around the room while explaining and try hard not to glimpse at Wilhemina. You knew that one look was enough to make you weak.
,,Sounds really good Ms. Y/N'' your boss announces before the male coworker from before agrees. ,,Don't you agree Ms. Venable?'' he questions and this takes you out of your thoughts.
,,Very good'' she coldly states as her brown eyes pierce straight into your soul. You had avoided eye contact with her for a long time. In-fact you don't think you had bared to really look into her eyes up until now as the past few months had been filled with too much pain.
You are pulled out of your thoughts when everyone gets up and your bosses saying how productive this meeting had been. You couldn't focus on anything that had been said as your thoughts kept wandering back to your past.
As you get up and gather your things, everyone had left and the redhead was just getting ready to leave when your male coworker stops you by the door. ,,What happened between you and Venny Bear?'' you swallow hard as you look at him and completely miss how fast Wilhemina had turned around at hearing those words.
The office had always suspected that you two had a thing going on, Wilhemina was usually very closed off at work, barely ever smiling or talking to anyone unless it was about work and absolutely necessary. However, when you started, her demeanor had changed slightly, despite it taking almost a year until she was open with you. Of course your bosses and coworkers had noticed as they suddenly saw Wilhemina as an actual person and not another robot they worked with.
,,Didn't last did it? we kinda always said that'' he carries on. Suddenly you are overwhelmed by anger and grief. Anger at his words. If you had known all those years ago when you first started seeing her, that someone had told you now it wouldn't last, you would have lost it completely. Grief overtakes second as the end of your relationship still haunted you to this very day. Her last words as she explained just why she couldn't do this but that she didn't want to hear you say a word about quitting. As you had worked too hard for you to just leave the position now. Equally you both knew she couldn't quit either having built the company from the ground.
As all of your emotions overtake you, you take a step forward, your eyes turning a darker colour. Wilheminas eyes widen as she sees your reaction. ,,How about you shut your mouth before I-'' you start, your fist clenching before you feel a hand grabbing yours. ,,He's not worth it Y/N'' you suddenly hear the redheads voice as you turn to face her. Your coworker had left as quickly as he could, intimidated by your sudden change of behaviour and definitely scared of Wilhemina and the fact she overheard the whole thing.
It feels as if time freezes right there, outside of the meeting room. Her brown concerned eyes meeting your angry ones. Slowly they turn a softer and calmer tone. Wihemina quickly lets go of your hand as she realizes she is still holding onto you? or holding you back? she isn't quite sure. As you feel her hand letting go, sadness washes over your face, despite your best efforts to hide it. Who knew that not having her hold your hand anymore would have such an effect on you? You miss her, her soft hand on yours, when she wasn't wearing her gloves. Her steady hand always finding yours whenever you needed it.
Wilhemina quickly clears her throat as her gaze averts yours. You try to think of what to say but somehow you can't find any words. You aren't sure whether to apologize for your behaviour or whether to be angry at her for hers in the past. As a result you simply give her a little nod as a thank you for keeping you from what was about to happen and the consequences of your actions before returning to your desk. Wilhemina walks the other way, towards her office and somehow the sound of your beating heart and her cane hitting the floor are in sync.
As you sit at your desk, trying to focus on your work, your thoughts keep travelling back to your ex lover, your Mina. Flashbacks wash over you like a hurricane and you drowning right in the middle of it. You remember how she took your hand and showed you how to do it all. She showed you how to love, taught you to laugh and how to not take everyone's crap all the time. She made you a lot stronger, you believed every word she had told you, every love confession and every single time she made you feel special.
Your relationship was quite the cliche. You had met her at work as she worked in HR. The first week was practically spent with her as she showed you around, or you heading to her desk every day dropping off some files. For the longest time you thought she was a bit strange. As she never really said a lot and the only times she did she insulted you but somehow you had liked it. You fell for her from the moment you first laid eyes on her but you thought she despised you, as she did with every other human being on the planet.
But suddenly it all changed, when she would drop by your desk, invite you to lunch at work, despite that being spent in utter silence the first couple of times. You had found out she never ate lunch other than alone in her office so you thought maybe she was ready to make a friend. However to Wilhemina you were always more than a friend. She saw something in you she hadn't really seen in anyone else before. She liked how you two could spend time in silence, how you wouldn't judge her or feel offended at her comments and how sometimes you even went along with it. Other than your looks, your humour but utter kindness were attractive to the woman, usually such a stranger to any type of affection, let alone the word love.
Wilhemina knew it wasn't a good idea considering this was both of your workplaces, however she couldn't keep herself from asking you to go get a coffee with her outside of work or inviting you to work on the projects your bosses had messed up, as a result you both having to work on the weekend. Even suggesting her own home just to do that. Her home was sacred to the woman and you knew when she first let you into that, that she had opened to you and the idea of you.
When she first kissed you, you felt like your feet were swept off the ground, thankful for the steady hand on your back, keeping you from loosing balance. Mina loved every single second she got to spend with you, especially the ones outside of work. Suddenly the usual loneliness she preferred was replaced by your presence. Usually quiet and lonely dinners were replaced by you sitting there, sometimes cooking for her and the late hours of the evening usually spend with a glass of wine, spend with you and two glasses of wine of course.
Suddenly the redhead enjoyed when you kissed her, she enjoyed holding your hand, the feeling of protection over you as she was ready to kill if anyone ever tried to hurt you in any way. Who knew that she would be the reason for your pain in the end?
,,Y/N?'' the sudden calling of your name interrupts the waves of flashbacks and pulls you back to shore. ,,Are you coming to lunch?'' another colleague asks. You think for a second before replying ,,I'm think I'm gonna skip today, still got a lot of work'' you point towards your computer. Your colleague simply smiles and nods, unknowing that since the meeting you hadn't even turned your computer back on, nor done any work.
Slowly you tell yourself it will be okay and that you need to get on with your projects. For the next half an hour you drown yourself in coding and work, not once taking your eyes off the screen or your thoughts off work. Meanwhile everyone other than your bosses joined for lunch in the cafeteria. The room is filled with quiet chattering, the occasional laughing when it suddenly stops altogether. Some eyes widen as they see Wilhemina walk in, holding onto her cane.
,,What is she doing here?'' one of them dares to mumble before Wilhemina glances at them. She quickly scans the room but even quicker turns around on her heels and leaves as she couldn't find what she came in here to look for. you.
The redhead makes her way over to your desk but halts as she sees you staring at your computer screen and tapping on the keyboard. She had no desire of course to eat in the cafeteria or any reason to be down here, as her office provided her with everything she needed, she came for you. She is worried about you, you not being the only one flooded by waves of flashbacks of the past.
Wilhemina remains by the door, watching you for a while, trying to find some sort of indication as to how you are feeling. However she is interrupted when she hears chattering again, knowing lunch was over by now, so she retreats back to her office. Just as she leaves you finally take a glimpse, knowing she was standing there all along, before continuing your work.
Somehow the day ended quicker than you originally thought as by your usual finish time, you manage to send the final project draft to your bosses. As you check your emails and calendar one more time, getting ready to go home, you are interrupted by your bosses. ,,Hey Y/N, great work on the project, can you go and take it to Ms. Venable? we are going to go hit the city, considering its a friday yk?''
Internally you roll your eyes but on the outside you simply politely agree as they walk off, joking about something, by now already high and probably drunk. ,,Shit'' you mumble, knowing you had to drop the project off at Wilhemina's desk but also not wanting another encounter for the day. For a second you consider just emailing it to her and leaving but you also knew she hates when things aren't done the proper way and final projects that need signing she usually prefers on her desk.
,,Guess I'll do it the right way then'' you think to yourself before opening the file and reading it again, making sure there are no mistakes whatsoever. After a couple of hours and several coffee breaks you finally have the finished project printed off on your desk, placed neatly in a folder and you finish by signing the last document. As you look at the time, you realize it had been four hours since everyone had left and you now realize you only did this so you could drop it on her desk and leave without any confrontation or having to face her again today.
You sign out of your computer, turn the little desk light off, grabbing your things before you walk out of the offices and head upstairs to her office. As you walk towards her office, the automatic ceiling lights turn on and you assume that did infact mean everyone left. As you enter her office, a familiar scent of lavender greeting you, you walk straight towards her desk.
As you look up, ready to place the project on the desk in front of you, you jump as you see Wilhemina sitting there. ,,Oh my god, Mi- Wilhemina I'm sorry'' you mumble, your voice shaking. ,,I thought you would have left by now'' you quickly add, feeling terrible for waltzing in and not noticing her there. She turns slightly on her chair, a hand holding onto her cane, her head slightly tilting before raising an eyebrow. Her mouth opens a little bit before she counters ,,What are you doing here so late?''.
You take a deep breath before explaining ,,Jeff and Mutt wanted me to pass the project to you for finalizing and signing''. You try to look anywhere but her eyes as you couldn't stand facing that pain again today. ,,And what took you so long? you finished the project several hours ago?'' she suggests, her tone changing into HR mode. ,,How?'' you start confused, your eyebrows furrowing.
,,Did you forget I was one of the recipients of the email?'' she asks, her words feeling like a slap in the face. You curse in your head for adding her to the recipient list instead of just Jeff and Mutt and how you didn't even notice it. ,,It's a friday night Y/N, we both know they wouldn't have signed it tonight and would ask you to pass it over to me''. she finally adds.
,,So you waited for hours for me to print it off and bring it to you?'' you counter, equally adapting your voice and slightly snappy. Your comment takes her by surprise as she stares at you. You quickly feel bad and apologize ,,I'm sorry Wilhemina, I wanted to make sure to hand it to you properly and it took a while for me to-'' but she interrupts you again. ,,Please Y/N we both know you wouldn't have sent it to your bosses if it wasn't really finished, and we both know you don't need four hours for printing and signing''. she interrupts you yet again.
,,Fine, what do you want me to say?'' you snap, your feelings suddenly taking over and the little voice in your head telling you to stay professional fading word by word. ,,Admit it, you didn't want to see me'' she suggests. The silence that follows is louder than any words could ever be. ,,My my'' she simply mumbles as she looks at you with those brown eyes again.
This was one of the few occasions where you had no idea what Wilhemina wants from you. Does she want you to snap at her? lay out your feelings and confront her with them? Does she want you in trouble? Does she want you to admit you did something you shouldn't have?.
,,Who knew you would go through such lengths to avoid me?'' she adds after a long silence and this is it, the last straw. Your emotions suddenly take over you, in addition of the long day and encounter from earlier today you couldn't hold back the things you had been meaning to say to her for a while now.
,,Who knew?'' you suddenly snap repeating her words.
,,Who knew that seeing you every single day was this unbearable?, Who knew that after all these years you would be long gone? Who knew that your forever was a lie`? Who knew I would do anything to touch you again, kiss you again and feel you again?'' you say
,,Who knew you would be the one breaking my heart, after all the promises you made me to make sure to never let anyone hurt me?Who knew time makes it so much harder? seeing you every day at work and you visiting me in my dreams when I am not in this god damn building?'' you carry on
,,Who knew I would miss you this damn much? ''
As you finish, you realize all of the things you just said, the tears streaming down your face and your knees feeling wobbly suddenly. Your eyes widen a little bit as you look up to see the redheads reaction.
You missed her initial reaction when you started speaking, a smirk in the beginning that with every single word falters to sad smile and a frown. Wilhemina expected a reaction, she wanted you to react and even provoke you a little but not like this. The redhead never expected it to hurt so much, who knew?
Who knew that Wilhemina would also feel those exact words that came from your mouth. every single detail. Who knew Wilhemina in that moment just wants to pull you into her embrace, press her lips onto yours but she can't.. not now. Not after everything that had happened and how she hurt you and ended things.
As you look up, Wilhemina isn't sitting at her desk anymore, suddenly she stands in front of you. Her eyes meeting yours, sad eyes. Wilhemina pulls you in anyway, despite everything within her telling her not to do this, not make the same mistake of hurting you again. She almost loses her balance as her lips move closer and eventually meet yours. Her cane isn't in the right spot for her to stand and bend slightly, so in response you wrap your arm around her and feel her breath hitch.
Suddenly you feel her smile into the kiss as her lips finally meet yours, a wave of feelings overtaking you, the familiar scent clouding your senses, your lips moving in sync and hearts beating in sync as well. You aren't sure whether you are supposed to still be angry, confused even because you most definitely are. But her lips, her lips on yours again, the feeling that you have been craving for months now. After all this time. Something so intimate and personal, so.. not Wilhemina.
She does love you? Who knew?
#wilhemina venable#sarah paulson#american horror story#ahs apocalypse#writing#wilhemina venable x reader#sarah paulson x reader#cordelia goode#ahs#billie dean howard#cordelia goode x reader#ahs coven#sarah paulson imagine
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How you became the Hargreeves Siblings' first friend
I hope you guys enjoy this. I'm not quite sure how I did but it was good :)
∆
So your wondering how you and the Hargreeves became friends? Well that a good question and I shall answer.
First of all, I think it was Viktor who first became friends with you
Now how you met.
You walked by the academy everyday to and from school (Well not everyday but the days you would go to school on)
One day, Viktor decides to take a break from practicing and look outside the window
As he looks outside, he sees you walking home from with some of your friends (if you don't have friends for a moment pretend that you for a moment pls 💀)
For a moment, he wishes he could experience that, friendship
Besides that, he doesn't give you much thought so forgets about you
Until a a few days later he sees you again, walking home from school with your friends
Viktor begins to think about befriending you
After giving it some thought, he decides to befriend you.
Although it would take hime some time to actually befriend you. Maybe after at what time you past by to know when to approach you and enough courage to ask you.
I imagine him waiting outside the academy waiting for you to past by.
When you arrive, he stands up and shyly approaches you
He introduces himself and you do the same. He explains that he notice that how you walk by his home everyday and wanted to befriend you and you, of course, accept which makes him happy.
You gave him your number and said your goodbyes
For the next few weeks, you guys have gotten close.
You guys have had sleepovers, hangout etc.
During all of this, he keep it a secret.
Viktor didn't want his father or his siblings to ruin his first friendship with someone.
For the first time in years, he's not alone.
But eventually, they found out.
One of them notice how strange he started acting and decided to tell the other.
Then they started to notice how strange Viktor started acting.
One day, when you and Viktor decided to have a sleepover, Allison walked by Viktor's room.
As she approaches his room, she hears laughing and she slows down.
She leans towards to hear better.
The other voice is not anyone of her siblings which conclude Viktor has a stranger over
Then all of a sudden, it all makes sense. Why Viktor has been strange.
Allison then informs her siblings on what she found out.
So one night, they come to his room wanting to know who the mysterious person.
Viktor tries to act like doesn't know what they're talking about
In the end, they got him to confess.
He explains how he became friends with you and for the past few weeks he has been sneaking out and sneaking you in to hang with you.
He makes them promise not to tell Reginald
They do promise as long as they get be friends with you
Viktor agrees but he tells them he must tell you before they met you.
Once they get an okay sign, they immediately want to meet you.
All of them have never had a friend.
So all of you plan a sleepover.
When you arrive, they crowd and someone has to remind the other not to surround you.
After sometime, you guys got close.
I also have a feeling that they all would try keep you and your visits a secret from Reginald, Grace and Pogo but they already know because they're not good at hiding.
I think for once Reginald let's it slide as long as they don't get distracted and forget about their training and homework
∆
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It's interesting how, in the Maedhros poll, everybody believes he started out as a good person. Whether he later turns into a misguided soul, or an anti-hero, or an anti-villain, or straight up villain is up for debate. But the consensus on him being morally good at the beginning is unanimous (or that is how it seems to me, given how I favourably worded the poll).
I find this fascinating because I disagree. I don't think he was ever a good person; he wasn't evil but he wasn't good good.
He showed loyalty and care towards his loved ones, yet he never went out of his way to help others, nor was any particularly good deed attributed to him. Have we seen him interacting in good faith with people outside the Noldor? (But he looked for Dior's twins! Did he find them though? It's the thought that counts! Well, his thought might as well have been to capture them for ransom, who knows?)
Some examples of a character being good are Fingon, he gambled his own life to rescue Maedhros, swept in at Alqualonde thinking the Noldor were being unjustly attacked. Even Caranthir is shown to possess compassion when he rescued the Haladin. Maglor famously slew a traitor, fostered their enemy's twins, and argued to break the Oath. Finrod was often found mingling with Men and willingly walked into the enemy's lair and thus to his death, all to repay a life-saving grace.
Amidst all this, what has Maedhros done to be called 'good'? He stood aside at Losgar but did not take any action to stop it or remedy it. Indeed, he stood aside at all for Fingon, not for Idril, or Finduilas or any of the others. Then he 'begged forgiveness for the desertion in Aman' and gave up his crown to keep peace, but the question arises, why could he not ensure harmony between the factions if he was King and repenting? Was it fear of his faction's arrogance or the distrust of the other? But a king is he that can hold his own, and Maedhros knew he could not do that. I think this act was a play at leaving with his head held high than to have himself be dispossessed of it. He might not be power hungry but he was pride-driven.
Then came the Dagor Bragollach. Most of the Fëanorions are driven out of their strongholds. Where was Maedhros? We have Finrod trying to help his brothers, while he himself is saved by Beor in turn. And in the end, it is Fingolfin challenging Morgoth to get revenge, if not reprieve, for his people. Where was Maedhros? He did deeds of surpassing valour to defend his own fortress. The narrative never has him extending a helping hand to anyone.
Then comes the Union of Maedhros, the alleged helping hand. An attempt to gather Beleriand together to fight against Morgoth. But was it to defeat the Enemy once and for all, ridding the people of his tyranny? Or was it to retrieve the Silmarils? Here too, Maedhros was asking for help, not giving it. Maedhros and his brothers only ever stood against the Vala because of their Oath and personal vendetta. It was never about 'oh but Morgoth is the enemy of all free people'. Their reasons were not altruistic.
Maedhros was never portrayed as virtuous or kind or empathetic. His descriptions in canon (if we can rely on its consistency) all leaned towards how lethal he was. That is not the mark of a good person. It is easy to forget Alqualonde in light of Doriath and Sirion, but never was it said that Maedhros did not kill in the first kinslaying. If the text could note him standing aside at Losgar, if 'good person' Maedhros ever aimed to maim instead of kill at Alqualonde, we would've known. But it didn't happen. He willingly shed blood, made no attempts to diffuse the situation, and agreed with his father 'to seize all the ships and depart suddenly' while leaving the rest behind. All this before his capture and trauma induced personality changes.
He did repent some things: the desertion of Fingolfin, Doriath, Elured and Elurin (note the lack of Alqualonde and Sirion). His repeated offences though, minimise any redemptive value this could've held. Moreover, did he ever send aid to the refugees at Sirion? Did he ever compensate all those who lost their loved ones on the Ice? So did Maedhros truly repent or was it again the thought that counts?
Maedhros may not have started with sins staining his records, but he also did not start with virtues painting him golden. He was deemed a good guy, simply by virtue (one of very few) of not being a bad one.
#this is simply how I chose to read him. not an opinion on your opinion of him#or how he truly is in 'canon'#I greatly prefer to see him as someone masquerading as good or rather trying to be good when he's actually quite grey#maedhros#silmarillion#me back on my 'mae was always bad guy coded' agenda
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An Incredibly Informal Epilogue to the Smiling Princess Series
For anyone who wants to know what happened after part five:
Taglist: @zulpix-blog
Just to clear it up, Finnick did encounter those mutts, he just didn't die from the attack. But they did leave him with some nasty wounds, which took a little while to heal from (which is why he was in that medical tent).
If the capitol took Sylke to compromise Finnick, they wouldn’t have taken Annie. And thus she was probably killed in the Victors’ Purge. :(
When the dust was beginning to settle, Coin called all of the victors to a meeting made her proposal.
Knowing that Sylke’s presence there would likely put majority with those against her proposal, Coin refused to recognise Sylke as a victor.
Obviously Finnick thought that was fucking bullshit and brought it up, but he was shut down as Coin introduced her proposal.
In the aftermath of Coin’s assassination, Sylke and Finnick agreed to live a quieter life away from politics and far away from the capitol.
The two of them settled in four. As one might guess, Finnick worked as a fisherman and Sylke as a dancer.
Saturday mornings and weekends in general were simply the best.
They relaxed in bed together for as long as they wanted, usually not getting up until midday.
Cooking together was regularly interrupted by bits of dancing. Once, they forgot to turn the flame off, but that didn’t happen again.
After dinner was usually the time to take a walk to the beach. By sunset, they would be walking hand in hand with water lapping at their feet.
And of course nothing is truly perfect. Finnick would still get nightmares. There were times when Sylke truly questioned reality. But each time, they were kind to themselves and each other. They had mercy for every mistake and every shortcoming. And they offered grace to themselves and the world around them.
For one must simply be kind, have mercy, and offer grace.
#finnick odair#finnick odair x reader#finnick x oc#finnick x reader#hungerverse#district 4#district 1#hunger games#catching fire#mockingjay#finnick odair x oc#fluff#angst#finnick odair fluff#finnick odair angst#thg#thg fanfiction#mockingjay part 2#Annie Cresta#President Coin
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arguments
summary: after king viserys' death you and aemond argue over aegon's claim to the throne.
tags: aemond x targaryen reader
warnings/context: angst, arguments.
a/n: i wrote this quickly so i might edit it in future.
it was the morning when alicent had entered the chambers you and aemond shared to inform the two of you that the king was dead. you were saddened by the news. you had cared about your grandsire, he had always been kind to you. before she left, alicent said something to you that surprised you. she said the king declared aegon his heir as his final wish. you had a hard time believing this, in the past, king viserys had done nothing but support rhaenyras claim.
you remained silent as aemond spoke with his mother. as alicent left you turned towards the front of your room, crossing your arms across your chest.
"do you really believe the king wanted aegon to be king?" you questioned your husband, who appeared to be deep in thought.
"i don't know. but if that's what mother says," he spoke, you could tell he didn't know what to believe. aemond had always been extremely loyal to his mother, and you assumed it would be no different this time.
"you have to realize how this looks." you stated, aemond turned to look at you, his expression hard. "his grace always supported rhaenyras claim, why did he change his mind on his deathbed? and in front of alicent, aegons mother of all people? why didn't he tell anyone else of his plans?" you questioned, more to yourself than to aemond. though, he answered anyway.
"what does it matter? aegon is going to be king." he stated turning to look away from you, and instead towards the view outside your window.
"everyone know what aegon enjoys doing, what he does in his free time. aegon is not fit to be king." you spoke with a sigh, aemond took steps towards you, he suddenly appeared angry.
"you do not know what you are talking about." aemond spoke through a clenched jaw, his working eye not meeting yours, instead focusing on anything but your face.
"i do know aegon!" you exclaimed. aemond finally looked at you. though, the usually comforting gaze of your husband was instead an angry glare.
"you are just blinded by the fact that you want your mother on the throne!" he yelled. you were taken aback by his tone, physically taking a step away from him. you and your husband had been in arguments before, but he had never raised his voice with you before.
"aemond-" you started, but you were cut off by aemond coming closer to you, grabbing your wrist in his hand. you winced as he took hold of your wrist, his grip painfully tight.
"you don't understand any of this, you should not speak about such things," he spoke, he didn't yell this time, but his voice was just as frightening to you. you didn't recognize the aemond in front of you, nor did you like it. you could feel your eyes beginning to well with tears, you gritted your teeth as you struggled in his grasp.
"aemond, you're hurting me!" you cried, voice shaky as you struggled against his grasp on your wrist. at your words aemond immediately dropped your wrist. you looked up to face him, his face had softened and his guilt was evident across his face. you moved quickly to exit the room, eager to be anywhere but that room. you could hear aemond from behind you.
"y/n, wait-" he spoke, but you ignored his calls, only moving quicker as you hurried down the hall and away from the room.
you had not spoken to aemond the rest of the day. it wasn't hard to ignore him, considering he was gone for the majority of the day searching for aegon. you figured you were okay to go back to your chambers after dinner, considering aemond was still not back. part of you wished he would get held up in flea bottom, searching for aegon.
when aemond did arrive home from his search, he entered your chambers to find you sitting on the bed, small sniffles could be heard coming from you. he could feel his stomach drop, his heart breaking as he listened to your crying, it hurt him more to know he was the reason you were crying. he approached you slowly, careful not to frighten you.
"my love," he spoke quietly, taking small steps towards the bed. he was unsure of what to say, he didn't know how upset you were, as he hadn't seen you all day. when you heard his voice you jumped up from the bed. "i'm sorry." he spoke, you could tell his apology was genuine. you both stood in silence for a moment, both of you were unsure of what to say. finally, you spoke.
"i know that i don't understand some things, but i am not an imbecile aemond." you spoke quietly, eyes avoiding his as you looked at the ground.
"you do not need to explain that to me, you are one of the most brilliant women that i have ever met." he spoke with a soft smile as he took steps closer to you. when he was close enough he brought a hand to cradle one of your cheeks, "i should not have said what i did. i was worried about aemond, and i took out all of my stress and worry on you. you deserve better than that."
"it's okay," you assured him, a small smile coming across your face so that you could prove you weren't lying. you brought a hand up to the hand on your face, holding his hand in your own.
"it was not okay, and i will spend the rest of our lives together trying to make up for it. i swear." he spoke quickly, you smiled at his eagerness to make things right between you as you brought your hand to his cheeks, pulling his face down to yours so that you could kiss him.
#aemond imagine#imagine#oneshot#aemond oneshot#house of the dragon#house of the dragon imagine#hotd#aemond#aemond targaryen#aemond x reader#aemond x targaryen reader#aemond x y/n#aemond x you
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A different sort of man
part ii
Gif by @nofckingfighting
The witch scours through every book on magic she owns, and Thomas spends the time trying to see how different this Tommy’s life is from his.
The tattoo on his hand is different.
Instead of TGC, he sees an entwined E and T. Same monogram on the linens, tiles on the floors and carved on his own desk.
“You got it done on our first anniversary in 1921, we didn’t have Charlie yet.” The witch answers as she tossed another book into the stack and leafed through the next one. “Charlie was born in 1922, September to be exact. We eloped on June 1920 and a month ago we had a church wedding to cover up the Russian business and because our families ---mainly Polly and my aunts--- demanded we pretend to be good catholic people despite us being atheists.”
“How do you know about the Russians?” he tensed.
He didn’t confide in anyone save Polly, he couldn’t trust Grace even after three years. Too many lies, too many things ruined by her presence alone.
Even his family was distancing themselves from him because they can’t stand her.
“Because you tell me things, we are not just husband and wife, we are also business partners, have been since I told you Grace was the rat and told Campbell about Black Star Day.” She answered before muttering a curse, tossed the book and began searching through the couch cushions.
Lucky, lucky Thomas Shelby, this Tommy has a wife he can trust, with a good head on her shoulders and a spark of gypsy magic.
Something gnaws at him because he knows he cannot even begin to comprehend why he even sought Grace out in London in the first place.
“Should your stay last longer than it should, I am perfectly equipped to handle everything the other you has left pending. I act as your proxy when you aren’t available, if I do need you to make an appearance, I will brief you on it.” The witch runs a tight ship it seems.
“Mrs. Shelby, Mrs. Gray is here.” Mary, the same housekeeper he employes said with a little more warmth than her counterpart.
“Thank you, Mary. Please send her in, I am afraid it is rather urgent.” She thanked the housekeeper with a smile.
Grace was not an easy woman to please, demanded perfection, demanded that everyone knew their place and would never have even acknowledged Mary with a smile.
Where had this woman been all these years, he found himself asking.
“71 Watery Lane, with my daj, Ethel Smith.” She answered his unspoken question to his horror.
“You aren’t you.” Polly cuts to the chase as they meet in his office.
“No. Believe it or not, when I went to sleep my wife’s name was Eva, my son Charlie was five months older and I would have never sought out Grace Burgess for what she did to us six years ago.” Tommy explained to Polly, she was closer to the original one, but there was a coldness to their interactions.
He couldn’t blame her, Eva had told him that Grace believed Pol to have incestuous feelings toward him and assumed it was jealousy and not disgust because she saw her for who she was.
“If only that version of you had your sensibility, boy.” His aunt said with pity aimed at the man whose body he occupied.
This Thomas had a similar tattoo on his hand, except for the monogram Eva has on tiles and linens, there is a G for Grace, a C for Charles and a T for Thomas.
This man’s feelings were not strong enough to keep it just their initials, he had to add the baby that turned a fuck up into his life.
“Yeah, if only.” He found himself agreeing as he tossed the photograph of Grace into a drawer.
This house was a dark and gaudy shrine to her and him, he had not been surprised to know she had not curtailed his less than fashionable décor. Worse, Grace Burgess had enabled him.
Grace’s tastes seemed to exist within the confinements of her wardrobe and even that was questionable.
If Eva were here she would have burned the garish purple wedding dress with unabashed gusto, along with every portrait he commissioned.
He missed her, not even three hours apart from her and he wants to return to her and his much, much happier life.
“What do we know about Eva Smith, granddaughter of Ethel Smith at 71 Watery Lane?” he doesn’t hear the quiet gasp until Polly’s dark eyes zero in at the woman spying on them.
Fuck.
Fuck him, fuck her, fuck them all.
If Grace was just as he remembered, she will be calling the All Saints’ Hospital to throw him in there before the sun sets today.
As if he didn’t already have the Russians to deal with too.
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Chosen of the Sun |
| portal // ninety
| @rollingsim | @keibea | @sani-sims | @catamano
next / previous / beginning
EIRA: What’s going on?
ÅSE: You! You are one of them! A necromancer! What evil do you whisper?
SARAYN: Calm your violent tongue, Valkyrie.
ÅSE: Don’t speak at me, Deathling! That magic is unnatural! What’s dead should remain dead! And you should join them! Let Pointy Ear alone and face your judgement!
KYRIE: Stop! All of you!
ÅSE: Come away now, Your Grace. I will protect you from vermin.
KYRIE: Please, listen to me. Lord Tev’us was only defending me.
EIRA: Defending?
KYRIE: That… assassin… was sent for me. I don’t know why or who sent him. Lord Tev’us saved my life. He only did what he did to try and get some answers. I knew of his magic, and I asked him to do it.
ÅSE: You knew? And you let him stay? Tch!
KYRIE: I trusted him, yes. I’m not asking you to do the same, but at least listen to me when I say he only did this on my word. If you want to level your hate at anyone, aim it at me.
ÅSE: Hmph. You are not who I thought you to be. What grace have you? Ridiculous! Come, Witcher, Lady Light! The air here is too foul!
KYRIE: Eve…
EVE: I… I need to think.
SARAYN: Why? Why lie on my behalf?
KYRIE: What lie? You did this for my sake.
SARAYN: You didn’t explicitly ask me to. You could have let them go on thinking what they wanted to think. It’s the truth, after all.
KYRIE: And make things more difficult for you? If they hate me, so be it. If they distrust me, let them. I can handle bitterness. But I don’t want to see you at the end a sword.
SARAYN: How noble of you to be concerned for my safety. Or how foolish. For all you know, I deserve to be at the end of that sword.
KYRIE: And perhaps I deserved to be at the end of his. If you like, you can simply consider it a debt repaid.
SARAYN: Very well. That point still stands. Someone has tried to kill you tonight.
KYRIE: So they have.
SARAYN: Even with my magic, the question remains: Why?
KYRIE: Kill the divine moon... It only makes sense that I would be next.
SARAYN: Next?
KYRIE: Damn. I hate when she’s right. But I suppose it’s true. I’m no longer safe here.
#ts4#ts4 screenshots#ts4 story#sims story#ts4 bachelor challenge#chosen of the sun#oc: kyrie#cc: sarayn tev'us#cc: åse dalgaard#cc: eve ravenclaw-silvermoon#cc: eira
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Okay, so I was rewatching Swan Song today and I was wondering what your thoughts are on why Jess decides not to tell Rory when they’re making up at the end. It seems like he’s gearing up to tell her, making her promise not to mock and not to tell anyone, but then he gets this look on his face and goes with the lie instead. Do you think the swan was standing behind Rory holding a knife in its beak and he lied to protect her?
I always love reading your takes on the characters, so I’d love to hear what you think is going on in his head during that convo.
Hahaha! 😂 (The swan with a knife). Yeah, I have often wondered this same question. And in the end, I think he just chickened out. And as a viewer, KNOWING the truth and then hearing the lie come out of his mouth always makes my heart sink with disappointment and dread, and I wonder if it's supposed to. Like, maybe it's meant to leave the viewer with a sense of unease and foreboding, because even though it looks like they're patching things up on the surface, there's still something wrong underneath. Jess isn't telling Rory everything. He's keeping secrets now (and I think that sets up their spiral at the end of the season).
As to WHY Jess doesn't tell her, from an in-story perspective? I think the bottom line is that he doesn't feel sure that he can trust her. He was going to tell her... but then he second-guessed himself. And I think, despite him saying, "I would have doubted me too," a part of him (the small, secret part of him that longs for love and trust and devotion, even though he thinks he doesn't deserve it) can't quite forget that she did. He had a really bad day... And she was ready to believe the very worst of him. She jumped straight to assuming he was at fault (just like Lorelai, just like everyone else), blaming him for things he didn't do, refusing to listen to him or give him any grace or understanding, and took the Other Guy's side in the altercation she imagined. And that HURTS. Rory is his girlfriend, and she's not on his side. He can't trust her to have his back when everything goes wrong. That's what this incident showed him. And for someone who ALREADY struggles to trust anyone? This incident will always be a lingering doubt in his mind now, even when he WANTS to forgive her. Maybe he was afraid she wouldn't even believe the swan story (so outlandish that even the idea of Jess "throwing a football with a buddy" seemed more believable to him). Maybe he was afraid she'd somehow use it against him in the future. I know I've hidden some pretty ridiculous and unimportant things about myself from my sister, because she has a history of ridiculing and bullying me, and I have a hard time trusting her not to weaponize any vulnerability against me. And once someone crosses that line with me, I can never quite forget it. I think Jess and I have that in common. So, later in the season, it's really not so surprising that Jess feels like he can't tell Rory about his failures at school, how his life is falling apart. He doesn't feel like he can trust that she'll give him any compassion or support. This incident will always make him fear what her response will be ("How could you DO this? How could you be so stupid?! I should have listened to everyone else when they told me what a loser you are! G-d, what was I THINKING, thinking you were worth ruining my life over?").
A "Swan Song" is a death cry. It comes from the legend that Mute Swans (called so because they're quieter than other swan species) can only give one last beautiful song as they're dying. It's the final nail in a coffin, even if it's a beautiful nail. And maybe their passionate kiss at the end of this episode is that for them. Because in the end, they cannot come back from what was broken here. This was the beginning of the End.
#Gilmore Girls#Literati#I have no idea if the writers intended the title to have that deep of a significance#But it does anyway. And the possibly unintentional poetry of it all KILLS me
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