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drvscarlett · 2 days

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BUT DADDY I LOVE HIM

Alex Albon x Horner!Reader

Summary: Max Verstappen and Sebastian Vettel may be Christian's favorites. But Y/N Horner has her own favorites.

The Tortured Drivers' Department series

A/N: one of my favorite tracks and i hope i could give it justice. let me know what you folks think

Taglist. @tea-bobba @boiohboii @c-losur3 @haikyuen @stelena-klayley @stinkyjax @0710khj @jinimon-tr

I'll tell you something right now you ain't gotta pray for me Me and my wild boy and all of this wild joy

LittleMissY/N what a fun winter break bonding before the 2019 season starts. aren't we cute #GiveYouButterflyWings

PierreGasly the disrespect, my face is cut off after taking so many photos of you!!!

LittleMissY/N sorry not sorry PierreGasly Seb is also upset that you didn't even include him in that photo. LittleMissY/N tell the man to make an ig first.

MaxVerstappen33 why did the rookie get a solo shot before I did???

LittleMissY/N don't be jealous maxie, atleast you're still in the family mantle MaxVerstappen33 you are not slick Y/N tsk, im telling your dad LittleMissY/N respectfully, fuck off!

Alex_Albon it was nice meeting you Y/N!

LittleMissY/N its so good to meet you too alex :))) PierreGasly suspicious behavior!

User3 enjoy your time out there with the boys!

User5 anyone notices how Y/N is literally teasing everyone and then when it comes to alex she seems shy

User7 I smell a crushhhh User9 be for real, maybe its because alex is a rookie and Y/N didn't bond well with him yet.

LittleMissY/N dad took me to work and not bad for a rookie!

ChristianHorner I'm not taking you to work again

LittleMissY/N don't you miss me?? i thought you missed me ChristianHorner not anymore LittleMissY/N too bad, im applying for a job in f1

PierreGasly are you even watching the race??

LittleMissY/N yeah, you missed the points lmao! PierreGasly i hate you

Alex_Albon not a really good start for me but I'll try better next time!

LittleMissY/N dont stress, you have plenty more opportunities to do well! I'll see you next GP? Alex_Albon of course, I mean I'm being paid to drive that car hahaha LittleMissY/N you're funny PierreGasly are you seeing this MaxVerstappen33 MaxVerstappen33 im dying out of laughter LittleMissY/N I'm gonna pay your mechanics to miss out a few screws

User5 she is so pretty!!! how come she is christian's daughter?

User7 I met her during FP1 and girlie is so in love with a driver

User8 i think we know why Y/N is coming around the races.

Alex_Albon happy to get some points for today! My first in my rookie year!

User2 Amazing job today Alex

User3 Alex Albon, you make us all proud!!!

LittleMissY/N GET IN THERE ALEX!!!!! BLOODY AMAZING!!! SUPERB DRIVE!!!

Alex_Albon thanks Y/N, i can hear you shouting from Red Bull to Toro Rosso LittleMissY/N this is amazing news and everyone has to hear it!!!!!

User5 alex and Y/N are so cuteeee!!! Y/N is so excited for Alex's first points

User7 anyone else ships Y/N and Alex??

F1Fans OOF! Albon suffers a big crash during the practice session in Shanghai. Do we think choosing Albon is the right choice for this season?

User1 nasty crash, too bad that he will be missing qualifying.

User2 c'mon be a little more lenient to the guy, shanghai is a difficult track

User3 should be sacked tbh

User4 why are they allowing albon to drive? he isn't that good.

LittleMissY/N oh get over yourself. i bet you can't even drive an f1 car even if you tried. Drivers crash every now and then, Alex Albon is a fantastic driver that's why Toro Rosso got him. This is just a bad weekend for him but I'm sure he will bounce back for the actual race. User7 my surprise when I realize that its actually Y/N Horner defending Alex Albon's honor User8 we love Y/N in this household.

User9 praying for a better race results for Alex

PierreGasly posted a story...

LittleMissY/N replied: HOW DARE YOUUU???? WHO IS THAT RAT???

LittleMissY/N but tbh thats a genuine reaction. imagine starting from p20 and ending up into p10??? LittleMissY/N OH PIERRE QUIT IGNORING ME! LittleMissY/N i hate you so much

Alex_Albon replied: oh no, what happened to her??

PierreGasly your biggest fan has a bit of a teary moments. She is currently filling up my DMs with how much of an amazing driver you are Alex_Albon that's really nice of Y/N

MaxVerstappen33 replied: man Y/N is down bad

PierreGasly i knowwww MaxVerstappen33 christian just walked in to ask if Y/N has a crush on Alex PierreGasly its so obvioussss MaxVerstappen33 well except for alex lol

GeorgeRussell63 with my best mate Alex_Albon !!

LittleMissY/N Well hello there georgie

GeorgeRussell63 hello miss Y/N Horner, what are you doing around here?? LittleMissY/N just saw you tag alex and figured i should say hi to his bestie GeorgeRussell63 im watching you LittleMissY/N ditto :))

Alex_Albon we look good there!

LittleMissY/N you look extremely handsome there Alex MaxVerstappen33 simppppp LittleMissY/N im gonna crash your car

User5 another bestfriends making it to formula 1 together

User7 its so funny how Y/N shows up in any tagged photos of alex, miss maam you are whippedt!!!

LittleMissY/N I'm off to crash anyone who crashes him in the next race. Mark my words!!!!!!!! Still a great drive from AA, my favorite driver <3

Alex_Albon thanks so much for the support Y/N. No need to crash to anyone

LittleMissY/N okay but my offer will always stand

PierreGasly you are sooooo down bad

LittleMissY/N I'm going to put you down

User6 is Y/N, Alex's girlfriend.

User7 i think she likes him and alex is so oblivious User9 yeah, Y/N likes alex so much LittleMissY/N shut it.

User11 i just love how supportive she is with alex being a rookie and all

ROOKIE ALBON DEFENDS Y/N HORNER.

In a recent interview, someone made a mistake of putting Y/N Horner in a bad light. Not to worry because Toro Rosso driver, Alex Albon is there to rescue. The whole thing starts with a simple question of what does Y/N contributes to the team to which Albon answers that Y/N is the social media manager. The interviewer made the mistake of commenting how anyone could do that job. This statement seems to anger the rookie as he defends her by listing down her educational achievements and how her role is important to the team. Albon refused to answer any question with that reporter and Christian Horner has placed an indefinite ban for his drivers to speak with the reporter.

LittleMissY/N when he defends you:

PierreGasly i would have hit that reporter's face if i was there

LittleMissY/N awww pierre, i knew you always had a soft spot for me. PierreGasly only we (max, seb, danny, and me) can make fun of you MaxVerstappen33 facts! LittleMissY/N good to know

User4 red bull boys lining up to protect their princess

User5 i swear, aren't they together yet???

GeorgeRussell63 when did i consent being posted as a meme???

LittleMissY/N since you became my new bestieeeee GeorgeRussell63 i also don't recall consenting to that LittleMissY/N its only a matter of time before you accept it.

LittleMissY/N gonna miss you so much pierreeeeeee anw time to transfer to red bull

User4 not the black and white photo

User5 its so weird to swap teammates in the middle of the season

PierreGasly dumbass.

LittleMissY/N I'll continue cheering you on always PierreGasly aren't you the sweetest? LittleMissY/N this is available for a limited time only

Alex_Albon thanks for the welcome again to RB maxverstappen33 LittleMissY/N

PierreGasly hey i gave you my seat, a little thank u would be great Alex_Albon thank you Pierre LittleMissY/N stop fighting alex, he is so kind PierreGasly oh c'mon!!!! MaxVerstappen33 mate, Y/N will always drop us for Alex. Dont forget that LittleMissY/N smartest person as ever Max

Alex_Albon the car is feeling really good for my first race in Red Bull. Good race from p14 to p5!

LittleMissY/N PROUD OF YOU ALEX!!! THAT WAS AN AMAZING DRIVE

User1 i swear Y/N you have notifs on for alex Alex_Albon thank you Y/N!!!

User3 Alex really deserves to be moved up with that RB seat

User4 RB proving themselves to be a big challenge to Mercedes this year

User5 sucks that max dnf this race, just imagine the next race where they can be stronger!!!!

LittleMissY/N i hate corona so much but im facetiming my bestfriend Alex and life seems a little bit better. Stay safe everyone

PierreGasly my beSTfrIend Alex

LittleMissY/N go to hell Pierre PierreGasly lolololollllll whippedt culture

User5 im pretty sure you miss the races as much as we do

LittleMissY/N for real but we have to make sure that its safe to race again

User5 queen Y/N!

User8 i love their little livestream on twitch every now and then. Its the best thing to pass time

User10 love you queen Y/N

LittleMissY/N BACK TO RACING AGAIN!!!!!!!!!

Alex_Albon quite excited to support us again?

LittleMissY/N of course, im red bull's biggest fan! MaxVerstappen33 red bull fan or alex albon fan? LittleMissY/N its good for you to know your place luv

User7 ITS RACE WEEKEND!!!

User8 look at them wearing masks, you should all do that too

User9 i cant tell you how much i missed races

F1Fans ICYMI, Checo Perez is getting that second Red Bull seat in 2021.

User1 wow checo??? congrats man!

User2 what about alex???

User3 im pretty sure a certain Horner is not happy with the decision User4 Im actually waiting for her reaction

LittleMissY/N AND THIS IS HOW I WILL FIND OUT????

LittleMissY/N you broke this family apart ChristianHorner LittleMissY/N BUT WHY???? User7 Y/N is just like us for real

User8 good riddance for albon, max needs a better teammate

User10 the only reason why albon has this seat is because Y/N Horner likes him a lot. LittleMissY/N everything that alex does is based on his pure talent. My dad won't even let me into meetings that's why im just as surprised as everyone regarding this decision. and fyi im gonna send this to my lawyers. User9 don't play with Y/N when it comes to alex.

LittleMissY/N Grill the grid episode, the one where I made them cook for my birthday

ChristianHorner happy birthday dear

User1 happy birthday to our queen, i hope lando made something edible for you!

User3 look at Y/N's birthday full of red bull current, former, and reserve drivers

PierreGasly sorry I couldn't make it but happy birthday to my soul sister

MaxVerstappen1 hoping for more birthdays for you Y/N

Schecoperez happy birthday hermana!

CarlosSainz55 Happy birthday little miss Y/N

Alex_Albon Happy birthday Y/N, hope you like your birthday!

LittleMissY/N thanks alex <3 User4 everyone been commenting on her post but she only responded to alex User9 girlie u r so whipped!!!

GeorgeRussell63 I wish you can get a seat next year mate

User5 i know, i think alex is wasting his potential being red bull's reserve driver

User7 right?? checo's chemistry with max is really good and i dont think christian will sacrifice that User8 i just want a decent team for alex

LittleMissY/N Are you cooking something georgie?

GeorgeRussell63 that depends, are you helping? LittleMissY/N for our common friend, absolutely User9 now what does this mean???? User10 anyone wanna tell me what's george and y/n conspiring together???

F1Fans No news about Albon's contract in 2022 and today we have seen Albon talking with Christian. It doesn't seem like its about contract renewal.

User2 anyone wanna bet that Christian is talking to Alex about Y/N

User3 what is going on, where will Alex be in 2022

User4 if alex switches teams then would Y/N switch too?

User5 i mean she already did it with toro rosso and red bull User6 but this is like the same group. What if Albon goes to Mercedes or McLaren, would Y/N join there too?? User7 blood is thicker than water everyone User5 i dont think yall understand how much of a simp Y/N is that she can go anywhere Alex goes.

User9 i just want alex to be in an f1 seat in 2022.

LittleMissY/N new hair, new color!

MaxVerstappen1 booooooooo!!! navy blue supremacy

LittleMissY/N i won't be taking any fashion advice from the man who literally wears only Red Bull merch. MaxVerstappen1 hey once upon a time you were always wearing our team merch especially when its no. 23 LittleMissY/N have fun crashing in the next race.

WilliamsRacing we like the color! Suits you!

User1 what is going onnnnn User2 i think alex is transferring to williams RedBullRacing im watching you

RedBullRacing we miss you queen!

LittleMissY/N aww, miss you!

WilliamsRacing Albon joins Williams for 2022! He will be partnering up with Nicholas Latifi, who retains his seat.

LittleMissY/N LETS GO!!!!!! FINALLY, ALBON BACK IN AN F1 SEAT

User1 Trying to beat Y/N in commenting and liking first, failed.

User3 so this is what george and Y/N is cooking.

User8 goodluck to alex!!!

User7 hoping that this time around, he can stick around for the long run.

Alex_Albon seas the day

User1 OMG BOYFRIEND ALEX????

User3 i think my bestie Y/N is crying somewhere rn

User4 i didn't expect alex has a girlfriend

User5 alex?? what are you doing?? this isn't Y/N

User7 have fun at your vacation alex!!!1

MaxVerstappen1 mate, who is she??

PierreGasly you should have warned us you were softlaunching someone

CarlosSainz55 congrats with the relationship bro!

Alex_Albon exploring the city with her.

User5 she takes so good photos of alex!

User7 queen Y/N its been 36 days since you last commented

User8 i fear girlie is heartbroken User9 i hope Y/N is okay

User10 alex and his girl are so perfect together

MaxVerstappen1 who is she alex??? cmon answer your phone

PierreGasly I swear were not sent by Christian to ask about this new girl of yours

WilliamsRacing pretty girl for a pretty boy!

Alex_Albon indeed <3

LittleMissY/N unbothered queen, so sorry for stabbing you GirlInRed

GirlInRed it hurts kind of little but anything for your therapy

User4 not Y/N fake stabbing someone because of Alex's girl

User6 this is so funny, Y/N

User8 so beautiful! you deserve better

MaxVerstappen1 well you know violence isn't always the answer.

LittleMissY/N oh really coming from you? MaxVerstappen1 cmon, I'll pick you up. Tell me where you are and lets talk LittleMissY/N i don't need to talk, im happy where i am

PierreGasly are you sure you're okay?

LittleMissY/N I have answered you a hundred times, im fine!!!!! PierreGasly Im still getting you ice cream LittleMissY/N awww pierre, you didn't have to

Alex_Albon merry christmas everybody!

MaxVerstappen1 hold up, did i miss a chapter or something???

PierreGasly is this a joke or something???

User4 I thought you have a girlfriend???

User7 all along its Y/N??? IT WAS Y/N ALL ALONG?

User9 lucky lucky lucky

GeorgeRussell63 FINALLY! I have been laughing so much with all the conspiracy online

MaxVerstappen1 you knew and you never even told us??? LandoNorris mate why didn't you even tell me? I thought we are 2019 rookies trio Alex_Albon sorry mates, i just have to keep this a secret a little longer

WilliamsRacing what a happy couple, so can we post your photos now?

RedBullRacing she is still our girl WilliamsRacing i think you should ask her about that

LittleMissY/N thankful for almost a year and a half with you

User4 what??? A YEAR AND A HALF???

User7 this is probably going on ever since Alex has moved to Williams

User8 my romeo and juliet!

ChristianHorner why am i not informed that it has been this long?

LittleMissY/N but daddy i love him :< ChristianHorner no. LittleMissY/N but what if im carrying his baby? ChristianHorner jesus christ, tell me you are kidding. LittleMissY/N i am but see it could be worse. i mean we just hid our relationship and not an entire family. ChristianHorner fine. invite him over and lets talk LittleMissY/N yay!!!

MaxVerstappen1 who knew you could keep a secret for that long???

PierreGasly Im more surprised that she was able to bag alex, are you sure you are perfectly sane Alex_Albon? Alex_Albon well I really really love her LittleMissY/N alex :< you used the love word Alex_Albon i mean you should have been used to it when you hear it everyday from when you wake up and before you fall asleep MaxVerstappen1 YOU TWO MAKE ME SICKKKKKK!!!!! NOT IN MY COMMENT SECTION

User10 folks i think we should apply to Y/N's school of being down bad and manifesting their dream partner

User15 what a lovely couple they are, goals!!!

#the tortured drivers department #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 smau #alex albon x reader #alex albon imagines #alex albon fluff

272 notes · View notes

insanityclause · 1 day

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Over the past 13 years, Tom Hiddleston has died more times than he can recall. “Let me think about this,” the actor tells us, pausing to count in his head. “I think, officially, there were two big ones.”

He’s referring to his many exits from the Marvel Cinematic Universe, the blockbuster franchise in which he’s played shape-shifting Norse god Loki Laufeyson since Kenneth Branagh’s 2011 film “Thor”—the son of Asgardians Odin (Anthony Hopkins) and Frigga (Rene Russo), and the half-sibling of Thor (Chris Hemsworth), the god of thunder.

The character has since bounced between villain and reluctant antihero across five films, a handful of post-credits scenes, and Michael Waldron’s Disney+ spinoff series “Loki,” which Hiddleston also executive produces. The show wrapped its second—and supposedly final—season last November. The finale presents an end for the character, but not one of the aforementioned “big ones.”

Hiddleston’s first “official” farewell came in Alan Taylor’s 2013 sequel “Thor: The Dark World,” which saw the god of mischief take a sword to the chest to save his beefy brother. “As written in the first script, it was a true sacrifice,” Hiddleston says. Unfortunately for Marvel’s long-term plans, the actor had done too good a job playing the trickster.

“When Marvel [executives] were testing the movie, they’d given [viewers] questionnaires that said, ‘Is there anything you didn’t understand?’ ” he remembers. “Literally every single audience member said, ‘Well, obviously, Loki’s not really dead.’ ”

In classic comic-book fashion, the character did return, gallivanting alongside his brother in Taika Waititi’s 2017 follow-up “Thor: Ragnarok.” He died again one year later (“big one” number two) in the Russo brothers’ “Avengers: Infinity War.” There were no smokescreens or questionnaires this time; audiences watched as Loki’s neck was crushed by the purple fist of intergalactic warlord Thanos (Josh Brolin).

Hiddleston remembers arriving in Atlanta to shoot his final scene and immediately bumping into Brolin. “He came up to me, gave me this huge hug, and said, ‘I’m so sorry, man.’ ”

He meant it, too; everyone meant it. The sun, it seemed, had actually set on Hiddleston’s MCU journey. “At the end of that scene, I got a big round of applause, and everybody was so sweet and kind and gracious,” he says. “I got notes and emails saying, ‘Tom, you’ve done so much for us—what a journey. Come and see us anytime.’ I really thought that was the end.”

And it was, for real, right up until it wasn’t—when the time-traveling shenanigans of 2019’s “Avengers: Endgame” blasted a younger version of Loki out of the established canon and into his own series. Over two seasons, the multiversal storyline envisions the title character as a figure who exists outside time and space. Across all there is, was, and may come to pass, there will always be a Loki, in some form, wreaking havoc.

Hiddleston has long since accepted what this means for him as an actor. Maybe “Loki” Season 2 really was his last time in the role; or maybe he’ll play him until the sun burns out. “I’ve realized that, in human consciousness, that’s who Loki is,” he says. “Loki is this ancient, mythic character, who, in our collective mythology, represents the trickster, the transgressor, the boundary-crosser, the shape-shifter—somebody who’s mercurial and spontaneous and unpredictable who will always confound your expectations and wriggle out from underneath your certainties and convictions. Someone who we need and [who] is necessary.”

Hiddleston pauses, getting emotional. “Maybe Loki escaping death a couple of times is sort of an emblem of who he is in our culture,” he says, grinning at his own gusto. The actor has a habit of being self-deprecating about the depth of the character’s lore. “I spend a lot of time thinking about Loki. You can probably tell.”

You can tell, and it’s incredibly endearing. Talking to Hiddleston about Loki feels like discussing Shakespeare’s Richard III with Laurence Olivier or Tennessee Williams’ Blanche DuBois with Jessica Lange. They were actors who put their definitive stamps on those roles by returning to the well and constantly digging deeper.

In conversation, Hiddleston is equally as likely to reference comic-book arcs as he is the ancient, anonymous Old Norse scribes of the “Poetic Edda” or Richard Wagner’s epic four-cycle opera “Der Ring des Nibelungen.” He speaks reverently of actors who embodied the trickster god before him, like Jim Carrey in Chuck Russell’s 1994 comedy “The Mask” and Alan Cumming in Lawrence Guterman’s 2005 sequel, “Son of the Mask.” He also heaps praise on those who played the part after him, such as his “Loki” costars Sophia Di Martino, Richard E. Grant, Deobia Oparei, and—in one very surreal Season 1 moment—“some alligator they found somewhere.” He cites legendary Marvel creators Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, and Walter Simonson alongside the likes of English essayist Walter Pater and Irish playwright George Bernard Shaw, who once wrote of life as a “splendid torch” to keep burning for those who follow.

“Loki is ‘a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment,’ ” Hiddleston quotes, “and I want to make it burn as brightly as I can before passing it on to future generations.”

This level of study started before he even landed the role. He recalls the 24 hours leading up to his “Thor” audition, when he was 28 years old. After graduating from the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art in 2005, he quickly earned small-screen and stage acclaim—but he hadn’t yet achieved a major breakthrough. When he received the script for “Thor,” it felt familiar. “I remember thinking, This is almost Shakespearean, this language,” Hiddleston says. “What’s the best example I can [look to] of an actor who managed to humanize and make real this elevated world of myth?”

He found the answer in Christopher Reeve, who played the title role in Richard Donner’s 1978 blockbuster “Superman.” “He’s masterful in that film,” Hiddleston says. “In a way, it’s a similar premise: He’s a god or he’s a being from a different realm, and it’s not naturalistic in the way that we might expect. He does it so truthfully, and it’s so clear and clean and open and honest. I thought, If I can even approximate or get close to the kind of clarity that Christopher Reeve had in those films, I’ll be lucky.”

And then, the morning of his “Thor” audition, Hiddleston went for a run, “which is my habit before doing anything unusual,” he explains.

Running has remained a constant throughout the actor’s MCU tenure. At any given moment over the last decade, the god of mischief was likely doing laps around Marvel’s go-to shooting location, Pinewood Studios (now Trilith Studios) in Atlanta. “Life is movement; I really believe that,” Hiddleston says.

“I find when I’m running or walking, the repetitive nature of it relaxes the mind and allows ideas and inspiration to come from a deeper place. I see my work as an actor—especially in preparation for a project or a scene—as almost preparing myself to be open and ready to receive ideas, to receive energy from other actors, to receive energy from my imagination.”

Hiddleston found the technique particularly helpful when he was filming a scene for the “Loki” series premiere that he calls “one of the most thrilling challenges I’ve ever had as an actor.” In it, Loki has been poached from the flow of time itself by the temporality-policing Time Variance Authority and forced to watch what is, essentially, a highlight reel of his entire MCU arc. It’s one of the most deeply existential moments you’ll ever find streaming alongside the likes of “Bluey” and the “Cars” movies. Here is a man watching the sum total of his life—his hopes, his dreams, his failures, his own death—play out in a 30-second clip that ends with the cold, clinical words: “End of file.”

“I just kept imagining: If you were afforded the opportunity or forced to watch your own death as a bystander, it would bring about an existential shock and crisis unlike any other,” Hiddleston explains. “It was a scene where I thought, I don’t have a reference for how to play this. I just have to allow shock, disgust, disgrace, shame, disbelief, acceptance, incredulity, and sorrow to exist in the center of me.”

As an executive producer on the series, Hiddleston had a say as to which of Loki’s many misdeeds would play in the sequence. He chose clips like Frigga’s death in “Thor: The Dark World” and his father’s final words in “Thor: Ragnarok”—moments Hiddleston knew would most fill the character with regret. As production was preparing to shoot the scene, he asked first assistant director Richard Graves for a 20-minute warning.

“I decided to jog around the stage and internalize as many of those memories of those people, those characters, those actors [as possible]—to try and find the center of my own vulnerability,” Hiddleston says. “Part of the joy of it was just going back to basics, trying to simplify this very complex thing…. Go for a jog, get into your body, allow yourself to be open, and just be there; just feel it.”

One “Loki”-like time jump later, Hiddleston found himself in a similar situation as he was preparing to shoot his final moment of Season 2—a scene that effectively caps Loki’s 13-year arc. Across 12 episodes, the show guided its title character toward a truly heroic end: With all of existence on the verge of collapse, he steps out of time to tie the strands of every reality together. As the credits roll, Loki sits at the center of time, holding in place all that is—alone.

It’s a lot for any actor to internalize, especially one who’s performing solo in front of a blue screen. With 45 minutes to cameras rolling, episode co-director Aaron Moorhead made a suggestion. “He said to me, ‘Why don’t you go back, if you can bear it, and watch some of your work [over] the last 15 years?’ ” Hiddleston remembers. “ ‘Take it in, see what it means to you, and then carry it when you step out onto the stage.’ ”

The actor took Moorhead’s advice to heart. And suddenly, without meaning to, he was mirroring the moment that started the series: absorbing the sum total of Loki’s MCU run. But this time, his regret had been replaced with gratitude. Hiddleston watched clips from “Thor,” remembering a time when he and Hemsworth had yet to ascend to the A-list. He recalled working with powerhouses like Hopkins and Russo, and the bonds he forged with the “original six Avengers” in 2011. He thought about how fun it was to film “Thor: Ragnarok” with Tessa Thompson and Jeff Goldblum, and of the more recent friendships he found with his “Loki” castmates Di Martino and Owen Wilson.

“I thought, What Loki is doing, he is doing for his friends. And so, Tom, why don’t you do it for your friends?” Hiddleston says. “That’s where the two of us met in that moment. And then I was so grateful I had this most amazing crew, and we did it together.”

The actor is, of course, noncommittal as to whether this is actually the end of his MCU run. The franchise is scheduled out until at least 2027, and Hemsworth has mentioned his desire to make another “Thor” film. And if Loki’s past has proven anything, even the most official endings can be undone.

Either way, it seems to Hiddleston that something significant has ended, even if it’s just Loki’s full-circle arc. “I hope it feels redemptive because his broken soul is partially healed; and you see that this character, who is capable of love, has made a decision from and for love,” he says. The actor cites the “beautiful prologue” of the first “Thor” film, in which Hopkins’ Odin tells his two sons: “Only one of you can ascend to the throne, but both of you were born to be kings.”

“At the end of Season 2, Loki is sitting on a kind of throne; but it’s not arrived in the shape he expected, and there’s no glory in it,” Hiddleston explains. “There’s a kind of burden, and he’s alone. He’s doing it for his friends, but he has to stay there without them. There’s a poetic melancholy there which I found very moving.”

For now, Hiddleston “can’t even conceive” of his life without Loki. He only hopes that he’s lived up to his guiding ethos as an actor, which he sums up with a plea from E.M. Forster’s 1910 novel “Howards End”: “Only connect the prose and the passion, and both will be exalted, and human love will be seen at its height.”

“The feedback loop for actors is that we get to inhabit a fiction,” Hiddleston says. “But hopefully, that fiction bears the shape of a truth that we recognize about life—that what we do reflects the ups and downs, the peaks and troughs, and the breadth and profundity of all of our lives.”

Hiddleston exists in that space between fiction and reality, the work and the resulting art, the prose and the passion. Long after we’ve moved on from our interview and started casually discussing the cherry blossoms blooming in New York, his eyes light up. He’s made another connection, remembered one more thing—just one last thing he’d like to impart about Loki.

He spends a lot of time thinking about Loki. You can probably tell.

“I’m so aware that the reason I’ve been able to play him for so long is because of the audience’s curiosity and passion,” Hiddleston says. “I’ve been delighted to find that for a character of such stature, he’s remarkably human. Many of the characteristics that people connect to in Loki are deeply human feelings. That’s been the pleasure, is infusing this elevated character with humanity.”

Even then, honestly, it feels as if Hiddleston, like Loki, could go on forever. Unfortunately, outside of the MCU, time moves in only one direction. Once again, he has to run.

This story originally appeared in the June 6 issue of Backstage Magazine. Subscribe to In the Envelope: The Actor's Podcast to hear our full conversation with Hiddleston (out 6/6).

#tom hiddleston #interview #backstage magazine #loki s2 #emmy fyc

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revealed-in-a-delusion · 2 days

Text

M a s t e r l i s t

This is a masterlist that will contain all the fics that I'll write, including all the parts for each series, so if it's more convinient for you to go back to this list, then you're more than welcome. However, all of my posts will contain links to the previous and next parts of the certain fics, so whatever fits you best!

You can send requests if you'd like me to write sonething based on your idea. You can definitely ask me to write about something not on the list below and I'll consider it because I may not be a fan of something you mention, but I can find myself enjoying the fandom quite enough to write something as well! The concept of me not writing about something I don't like or am not educated enough to comes from the pure desire to write something actually good, that's why I need to be confident in my knowledge of the fandom <3

The fandoms I 100% would write for are Jujutsu Kaisen, Avatar (2009 & ATWOW) and Our Life visual novels as of now. If I think of something else, I'll add it, but it doesn't mean I won't write for other then these three fandoms.

Jujutsu Kaisen

One of Us ( Gojo x reader )

When you were younger, you were saved from a special grade curse by a sorcerer, he became your one-night stand and then, later on, your child’s father. You weren’t going to try and reach out to him about that one, but years after you found yourself standing in the Jujutsu High gardens ready to beg for your son’s protection.

Part One ~ Part Two ~ Part Three (in progress)

Bonus parts: Timeline: before main Part One

#jjk #avatar the way of water #atwow #our life #jjk x reader #atwow x reader #our life x reader #masterlist #jujutsu kaisen x reader

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happeehippie · 1 day

Text

instagram. j.b.

summary: follow along with joe and his wife evie as they go through is football career.

*face claim is yasmin quintana*

series masterlist.

evie

liked by joeyb_9, lahjay10_, and 780,726 others

evie: “holding hands is like touching souls” 🤍

view all 5,729 comments…

user: how are we supposed to just live with this

user: i’m so jealous

joeyb_9: my girl. 😚

> evie: always always always.

user: do you think he knows she just posts him for attention?

> user: do you think he will ever see this comment? probably not.

user: i’m feeling extremely single right now.

lahjay10_: y’all be holding hands like crazy

> evie: we locked for life. 🤍🔒

user: wait this is actually so sweet, imagine how many pics she has of them just holding hands. she’s so down bad.

joeyb_9

liked by evie, lahjay10_ and 304,837 others

joeyb_9: Green Goblin

view all 2,681 comments…

user: Great football Joe!

user: SHIESTYYYYYY

millyg: joey tell ev to text me back.

user: green like that bank account baby

user: that’s hot

evie: 🥦🥒🍏🫛🫑🥑

> joeyb_9: you gotta calm down.

user: QB is always sharp

evie

liked by bengals, joeyb_9, and 990,864 others

evie: out here

view all 1,863 comments…

user: tell jb to pop a perc and get back out there

> evie: kind of a tactless comment my guy, he’d be out there if he was able.

user: man screwed my fantasy team

> evie: yeah forget your fantasy team, it wasn’t his fault.

user: brave woman

joeyb_9: jacket=dope

user: chefs kiss

user: go bengals!

millyg: i love to see you this happy 💗💗

joeyb_9

liked by bengals, lahjay10_, and 709,950 others

joeyb_9: Just another stage on the journey of life

view all 11,306 comments…

user: praying for you my boy

nfl: 🙏🏼

evie: keep your head up baby, i love you.

> joeyb_9: couldn’t do it without you

joemainmixon: We got you brother!

user: the “he’s back” post next season is going to go crazy

user: get better soon lover

lahjay10_: the comeback will be legendary

user: revenge tour for real next year

cjstroud: 🙏🏾

user: joey take my wrist, i don’t need it.

evie

liked by millyg, joeyb_9, and 91,736 others

evie: another gamedey in jungle. if you’re not in cincy you stink!

view all 7,728 comments…

user: still going to games??

> evie: ofc. those are my boys!

millyg: my little sweet pea

> evie: 🫛

user: my mom loves you (me too btw)

> evie: i luv ur mom. 😁💗

user: love to see you smiling

user: how is jb?

> evie: inspiring. 💗

joeyb_9: i like you.

> evie: omg thanks for sharing. i like you 2. 🤩🤪

joeyb_9

liked by lahjay10_, evie, and 852,100 others

joeyb_9: Learn to love discomfort

view all 5,793 comments…

lahjay10_: haha i just know you uncomfortable sitting like that. that’s what you mean by the caption?

> evie: lmao ur goofy

user: let’s go jb6

user: biggest qb in the league

user: happy birthday joe we love you!

evie: criss cross applesauce???

> joeyb_9: it’s called indian style. 🙄

> evie: is that what the big kids are calling it??

> user: ev is on his ass

user: it doesn’t go unnoticed you being on the sidelines for your teammates

user: are you and ev going to celebrate your special day?

> evie: we don’t skip bdays around here. even if you have a major surgery..

user: happy birthday king joe!

evie

liked by millyg, joeyb_9, and 890,110 others

evie: bits and pieces

view all 3,611 comments…

user: wishing you and joe a lovely off season and smooth recovery

> evie: 💗💗💗

user: you’ll be back killing it next season! i can’t wait

user: okay, the teddy shirt? CUTE!

> evie: one of my favs

user: always giving us a peek at jb

> user: it’s funny how ev used to be the only one that called him jb and now it’s become one of his many nicknames.

user: going to be missing you this off season.

joeyb_9: puddle pic is 10/10 cuteness

> evie: 🥹💗

joeyb_9

liked nfl, bengals, and 891,028 others

joeyb_9: Sorry for the missed time. Return of the Jedi

view all 10,112 comments…

user: i hope my gf doesn’t see this post

user: miss u

user: see you next year daddy joe

evie: joe you can’t just post this on a monday morning with no warning.

> user: ev saying what we are all thinking

> joeyb_9: oh, i don’t know the rules. i thought this was my account.

> evie: smart. ass.

user: BURROW REVENGE ARC

user: can’t wait to see you back!

evies stories

* last part for now. 😢 *

if you want me to pick this back up once the season starts, give this a big ❤️ hehehe.

#joe burrow #nfl #nfl imagine #bengals #cincinnati bengals #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow insta au #joe burrow instagram

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gffa · 3 days

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Dearest gffa, you are the only person I know whose been reading Batfamily comics. (Though I do read some of the fanfic haha). The destiel meme informed me that Bad Things just happened in the latest comics. Is there a primer to the latest drama? (Everyone seems upset). Are you ok?

Best wishes, your fandom neighbor on Star Wars Street

I assume this is about the Batman #148 leaks? I haven't seen a ton of drama (other than a couple of posts, including the Destiel meme notification that got me to go see what was happening) but if that's it, it's kind of funny, because okay. As far as I've seen (the issue isn't even out yet, so I can't read it until tomorrow, I'm only going on the leaked panels I've seen) what happens in the issue is that Failsafe-- okay, let me back up. In the current Batman run (written by Chip Zdarsky), awhile back Bruce created a super powerful robot that was meant to be activated in the case of him going rogue so that it could take him down, and it's very coldly logical, based on his patterns, so it knows him extremely well and is hard to beat. It's powerful enough that it apparently took out the Justice League awhile back (I haven't read that arc yet, so take that with a grain of salt), which means now that Failsafe has gone rogue in the current Batman series that Zdarsky's writing, Bruce is having a hell of a time fighting it, especially with his "backup personality" Zur-En-Arrh (Bruce is a paranoid shit and I love him the most) is also running amok in his head and he's fighting back against that. Back up further--in late 2023, there was an event called "Gotham War" that was basically, "Bruce has been through a lot of shit lately, so he was out of commission for several months, in that time Selina stepped up in Gotham and started training crooks to be cat burglars instead of rogues' goons, Bruce woke up, thought this was bullshit, despite that crime was down, and they basically had a turf war while Bruce was losing his goddamned mind because of what he'd been through and because Zur-En-Arrh was literally ratting the bars of the cage of his mind, and part of the fallout being that Bruce dosed Jason with a gas that basically made his adrenaline go wild any time he would do anything dangerous, so that he could no longer be in this life of crime or vigilantism, because Jason had killed a lot of people, but Bruce couldn't bear to send him to jail, so this was the only way he could live with taking Jason out of the life they lived". Gotham War was extremely controversial--I had fun with it, because it was BONKERS and I fuckin' love bonkers stuff in the "punching people in the face solves crime" genre, but a lot of people were really angry about how Jason was treated in the arc. Zdarsky co-wrote Gotham War, so this is a continuation of a lot of people's frustration and anger towards how Jason has been treated by DC especially by this author.

There's also a lot of lingering frustration and resentment in fandom because Jason is not always written well or frequently. He doesn't have his own solo book these days, half of what's written about him is written by authors with VASTLY different takes from the other half of the writers out there, and there's a lot of fanon that goes around with Jason's sub-section of fandom where I think it furthers the divide because the fic that's written about Jason delves deep into his character in specific ways that the canon doesn't match and I think it can set expectations for some fans that are just not matched by DC themselves, either because they see Jason differently or because Jason just doesn't have a lot of fans at the company itself, I couldn't say for sure. So, now comes Batman #148 leaks (it's not actually out until tomorrow), where Failsafe kills Jason and Bruce has a dramatic reaction to it, and a lot of people are furious that DC would kill Jason at all, much less with such little fanfare, after how little focus he's gotten over the last several years. The thing is, though, that Jason doesn't stay dead, he's alive again by the end of the issue (I've seen panels from later in the issue) and I'm not sure how many people are reacting just to seeing the posts flying around fandom versus how many people have actually seen the whole context. Because context is slowly rolling out, but people generally aren't soothed by that, given the lead-up to this moment. Basically, years of Jason not getting much focus in the comics + the events of Gotham War have led to a powderkeg of a situation and the contextless leaks (ie, without the panel where Jason's alive again) took a match to the whole thing. And that's what's going on, as far as I know! I personally am having a great time because I was extremely skeptical that they would actually kill Jason without any fanfare and also I like Jason as a hot mess with crunchy relationships with people and that he's done bad things and had bad things done to him/been a victim as well, so all this messy drama in the story has me living for it. (This would have been a very different situation if I'd thought Jason was really dead, but I didn't, so I'm doing fine right now. Also, my Blorbo is Dick Grayson, so I've already been through this wringer and I'm still mad at DiDio for it, so it's Jason-Blorbo's time now.)

#lumi.txt #dc #batfam #not tagging this because i know better

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bengiyo · 15 hours

Note

I can say with confidence that our collective favorite show, between you and me, is What Did You Eat Yesterday?, the GOAT BL, and an exemplary example of a slice of life drama. What are your other favorite slice of life dramas, BLs and non-BLs?

Thank you for this ask. I have been trying to stay out of a bunch of discussions about this, but it seems that people feel really strongly about how people talk about a mid-tier BL produced by the largest producer of BL content in the world, currently sold as a premium product exclusively on a Chinese streaming platform, and currently receiving almost universal acclaim from its viewership on this platform. So, since I am possibly the only person who has posted publicly how much this show doesn’t work for me, I will continue with my task and clear up some confusion I’m having with the discourse.

We Are…Struggling With Definitions

Thankfully, @lurkingshan provided a good framework to discuss what slice-of-life even means. While I am willing to accept that a strong episodic structure is not inherently required for a good slice-of-life drama, the bite-sized nature of an episode lends itself to enabling clear stories about the complexities of mundane human existence. It’s a very popular genre, especially in anime. As I said in an earlier post, this is a mature genre with a long tradition.

Most of my favorite approaches to slice-of-life are from Japan. When America does slice-of-life, you get it more as sitcoms than thoughtful dramas about everyday life. One of my favorites would probably be Midnight Diner. As Shan defined before, a good slice-of-life drama could go on forever, and in so many ways Midnight Diner has.

I’m actually currently watching Three Star Bar in Nishi Ogikubo because Machida Keita and Fujiwara Kisetsu are in it.

We Are…Already Familiar With Slice of Life QL

We’ve actually had a few QL projects cover the slice-of-life feeling before.

You and I are both big fans of What Did You Eat Yesterday?, a show I loved so much we had to do a whole podcast episode about it.

On the lesbian side of the equation, we have the lovely She Loves to Cook, and She Loves to Eat.

We also had Naked Dining, which I had some mixed feelings about.

There's the gay dads drama from Taiwan in Papa & Daddy.

For people who seem to struggle with non-Thai productions, there’s also Ingredients with everyone’s favorite singer Jeff Satur.

Besides, I argue firmly that Tadaima, Okaeri is the only true slice-of-life BL airing right now. It’s the married gay dads show we’ve been asking forever to get, and it’s even in the omegaverse!

We Are…Possibly Suffering From Recency Bias

It’s surprising for me how hard everyone has fallen for this show, considering the long history of reactions to New Siwaj’s work. He’s been in the genre for over a decade.

I am intimately familiar with this man’s work, and have been a Make It Right Apologist for years. I’ve been with this man since I got into the genre. This isn’t even his first attempt at 16 episodes about boys in college.

Everyone else watched My Engineer at the time, but I watched EN of Love and was not surprised when Love Mechanics got its own full series afterwards. I’ve been with this man working through gay angst in Make it Right, examining intergenerational queer trauma in Until We Meet Again, fumbling through Between Us, trying for something in Dear Doctor I’m Coming For Soul, hustling in Even Sun, still crying with him over Love of Siam (2007) in My Only 12%, and squandering everyone’s time in Absolute Zero.

It’s kinda baffling to me that I’m catching strays over not liking New Siwaj works in 2024. It feels weird that the show I’m getting heat over not liking is the least-queer thing I think he’s ever made. I don’t know what that says about current BL tastes. I will say this plainly every time: Queer Truth is Non-Negotiable For Me In a Genre About Boys Kissing Each Other. If that statement bothers you, please swerve on.

We Are…Not the Only Examples of Queer Fun

While we’re here, I wanna talk about how there really is a whole gay world outside of BL. I feel very strongly that Western viewers are extremely rude and often racist when it comes to their disdain of BL. However, there is all kinds of fun to be had in queer cinema if you can handle projects made more than a few years ago.

If you want silly fun, you can always go to TLA Releasing. They funded an entire gay parody of the American Pie franchise. They’re great for the types who want to see pretty people smile at each other and have sexy times.

If you’re in the mood for something a bit more serious and heartfelt, you can dip by Strand Releasing. They have one of the best coming-of-age queer films I’ve ever seen. They also picked up a really melancholy Japanese film called Egoist.

My favorite studio, who shows up repeatedly on my BL Syllabus is Wolfe Releasing. They have my all-time favorite Big Eden (2000), and many others.

My point is that there is a huge world of queer media out there well beyond the latest mid-tier BL from GMMTV designed to keep the boys working. We also don’t need to argue that some of their shows are more queer than they actually are, especially when Cooking Crush is right there.

Thanks for the ask!

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writingquestionsanswered · 2 days

Note

I think my ego is getting in the way of my writing. It's confusing, because I doubt my ideas and writing, but I still feel competitive in a way. I don't like reading about others' WIPs, I avoid reading the genre I want to write, and I automatically dislike authors who's already published a book similar to any of my WIPs. I quit the ACOTAR series because the themes were too similar, and I'm scared of Priory of the Orange Tree because the worldbuilding has intense good praise. I need an egodeath.

Case of Strong Ego or Low Self-Confidence?

If you're doubting your ideas and writing, I would question whether it's actually your ego getting in the way and maybe not just good old-fashioned low self-confidence. The reason I wonder is because your dislikes and aversions all sound fear-based to me. For example, if your ego were an issue, you probably wouldn't dislike or avoid authors who did something similar... you'd more likely scoff at their relative inferiority and boast that you did it better. You wouldn't be afraid of a book because its world building received good praise... you'd roll your eyes and say you don't know what people are going on about, because your world building is so much better.

Dislike and aversion instead seem to indicate jealousy and self-doubt. The good news, however, is that low self-confidence is actually pretty typical for writers and it's something that gets better with time.

Here are some things I hope will help boost your confidence, or at least give you hope that it will get better:

1 - Writers with big egos probably aren't as great as they think they are. In reality, storytelling is a craft no one can truly master, because reader appetites, story material, and even mechanics to a degree all evolve over time. What makes a good story is also very, very subjective. There are people who consider Jane Austen one of the best writers to ever grace the Earth, and there are people who think she's one of the worst. I think truly good writers can know that they're good without thinking everyone else is beneath them.

2 - You can't doubt your ideas and writing without understanding where you want your ideas and writing to be. In other words, you know what good ideas and good writing sound like to you, which means your taste and style are intact... you just have a little bit further to go to get your own ideas and writing where you want it to be, but that's okay. Going back to #1 a bit, writers don't hit some magical peak early on and level off at greatness. There's a lifelong upward trajectory with each book being a little bit better than the last. And sure, it's not a perfect upward trajectory. You can have periods of leveling out or even dropping off, but most writers will continue to get better over time. So, again, it's okay that your writing isn't quite where you want it to be, because it's that feeling that drives us to get better and better and better. This shows you're on the right track!

3 - Those similarities aren't the big deal you think they are... I've been at this a long time, and I'm going to tell you right now: stop worrying about "similarities" in other books. I've posted about this a lot because it's a common concern, but similarities are a dime a dozen in fiction. For every book about a high school girl who falls in love with a vampire, there are a dozen more. For every book about a woman who quits her big city job after a divorce, moves home to her small town, and falls in love with her childhood nemesis, there are at least twenty others. There are countless stories about young women getting wrapped up with fae princes, sad boys/men whose lives are invigorated by a Manic Pixie Dream Girl, murder mysteries set in quiet fishing villages, horror stories set in dilapidated old mansions someone just inherited from a long lost aunt, kids or adult who learn they've secretly been magic all along and get roped into fighting a Big Magical Bad. There are over 100 million books in existence, and that number increases by hundreds of thousands every year. You're never going to write a book that doesn't have similarities with dozens of other books, so stop worrying about it. Remember, it's not the similarities that matter... it's everything else... all the things that only you can do.

4 - Similarities are actually a good thing. The truth of the matter is, similarities are actually a good thing. That's why you can look back through cinematic history and see major trends... monsters, westerns, musicals, disasters, sci-fi, action, epic adventures, rom coms, superheroes... It's why when a book about a young woman toppling a dystopian regime becomes massively popular, dozens of other dystopian books hit the shelves the following year. It's why we gravitate toward favorite genres and tropes and comfort shows. Its why we go to the same restaurants and stores over and over again instead of going to a brand new one every time. Humans like a bit of repetition, and if your book has similar world building to Priory of the Orange Tree, that's a bunch of readers who are going to gravitate toward your book.

5 - There's only so much material to go around. I was interested in the fact that your concern about ACOTAR was that the "themes were too similar," but I promise you, those themes are in a million other stories. When it comes to tropes and themes and character arcs and magic systems and settings and... all of it... there's only so much material. Themes aren't something that are created from nothing. You can't make up an original theme that no one else has explored. Themes are inherent to human existence. They're truths about humanity that beg to be examined and explored. It's not the themes that matter so much as how they're explored and what you say about them, and even if there were similarities there, odds are there were far more differences.

I hope this resonates and helps. I hope I was right that it's more of a self-confidence issue than an ego issue. And if I was wrong, maybe something here will still resonate. You might spend some time in the "writing-related fears" section of my Motivation master list to see if anything there resonates, too. ♥

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking ♦ Learn more about WQA here

#wqaadvice

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bratbby333 · 1 day

Text

. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋ [ blog update ! ] ࿐ྂ

+ some housekeeping and info on new writing

hello my loves !! i wanted to give y'all some insight on what's been going on in my mind palace lately. there's a lot...so...cmon, take a walk w me...and maybe bring some snacks.

ੈ♡˳ first and foremost ! my work has received a lot more attention recently and i am so excited. with actual tears in my eyes, im happy to report that i surpassed 1,000 followers the other day. i am at a loss for words...just...stuck in a perma-state of disbelief.

im sending out the biggest thank you to everyone who has supported me, who's interacted with my work, to the lovely friends ive made though this account and to the heartbreakingly beautiful anime that brought me here in the first place. i am genuinely in awe...overwhelmed, even...i didn't expect any of this to happen when i started this blog and i am forever indebted to all of you for getting me here. im actively fighting off the inevitable surge of imposter syndrome as i type this out...i just love y'all so fucking much. this community means the world to me and i wanna scream at the top of my lungs in order to demonstrate my deepest appreciation for each and every one of y'all.

ੈ♡˳ secondly ! a message for my little angel babies, my day one followers; thank you for taking a chance on me. for watching me grow. for sticking around as i worked to get better at writing. im sure a lot of you started following me for my gamer!bf sukuna series...trust me, i love him and i know y'all do too. but i feel like my writing is heading in a different direction...and with a heavy heart, i'm absolutely gutted when i say that i am taking a pause on that series. i am forever grateful for the support and may return to him soon, though i cannot promise that. i owe so much of what my account is now to that series and i will never forget that.

for everyone who joined me as i delved into dark/dead dove content, thank you from the bottom of my heart for allowing me a safe space to explore different forms of story-telling. my choso fic was the first stepping stone and then i skipped every other stone on the path and jumped head first into the deep end with my dead dove gojo fic...i deeply appreciate all the positive feedback i received on both of those. after posting them, i realized that i am very into writing dark content. i know that taboo themes/dark content/dead dove subject matter isn't for everyone and i understand people's apprehension in regards to it. but with that being said, i will be moving forward with publishing darker content.

ੈ♡˳ so here's the writing update !

i did a poll asking y'all what kind of content you enjoy. a good chunk of people said long form fics (which is great, cause i do too !! mommy needs plot). so, i am migrating away from one shot writing. both because i've been thinking about it for awhile and because y'all are into longer stories, as well. but fear not, i will still write shorter stuff along with headcannons, drabbles, etc...it just won't be the main focus of my blog anymore.

ੈ♡˳ now, time for the big reveal ! perhaps it's a bit anticlimactic, but bear with me...

im so excited to announce that i have two new series coming ! it will be a dark, modern!au featuring choso (with a few other special guests) and a dead dove sukuna series.

i'm almost finished with the outlines, and have fully completed the theme layout + mood boards for both works. i hope to get the first few chapters wrapped up in the next couple weeks. if you want to be tagged in either of these (or both), just leave a comment or send me a message !

(also !! i may or may not be cooking up a dark medieval au series in collaboration with another writer on here...so be on the lookout for that hehe)

while i take breaks from writing my two series, i'll be working through my requests ! so if you've sent one in, i promise i will get to it, unless i literally cannot think of a good way to write it (im only human, im so sorry). also, im sure we already knew this, but im a slowww writer. i wish i could churn content out quick as fuck but i am too hypercritical of myself…it's both a blessing and a curse, honestly.

if you made it all the way to the end of this nightmare of a brain dump, i love you. if you've been with me for a while, i love you. if you're just now joining me, i love you. everyone who’s supported me in any way, shape, or form, i love you.

i present you with the sloppiest kiss with tongue (only if you want it, of course. i can also give you the tightest hug, the gentlest head pat, or my social security number...access to all my bank accounts? a mansion in the hills? my passport? hand in marriage? my first born child? literally whatever you want, babe).

okay !! i think that's all for the updates. feeling: very ambitious and motivated but also overwhelmed and mildly stressed but overall super excited for what's to come. im looking forward to this new adventure and i hope y'all come along with me ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

thank you again…for literally everything. yall hold a special place in my heart and always will. so, here we go !

see you on the other side, my loves.

— jade 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪

#—bby’s babbles🪴#jjk fanfic #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen writing #jjk x reader #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #bratbby333

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justatalkingface · 1 day

Note

Hi there,

I'd love to know your ideas and opinion on Hori going out of his way to make Bakugou the second OFA user as it was shown in the movie. Are you a fan of it?

This post has aged badly because of how long it's been sitting in my inbox, but... well, I was the one who did that, so that's my own fault.

Hahahahahah, yeah, wow, sweet flying fuck no. In a series that has been escalating in how many bad decisions they've made lately, that is one of the worst. More than that, it is telling, in this deeply concerning way, about how little Hori seems to like his own main character.

I've never watched the movie, and I have no desire to, because I'm pretty sure all that'd happen if I did would be me spending the entire movie picking out plot holes than anything, but I have done some basic research on it, and my impression is that it's very... Naruto filler-movie-y, where the protagonists get Random Power up that is basically never spoken of again (note that this is basically official confirmation of Bakugou's promotion), the same general kind of big fight sequence where both of them work together, etc.

It's just... it's just shallow, though, is the thing. At least the filler Naruto movies had the basic decency to make up whatever power up they used and threw away; here Izuku is taking one of the foundational parts of the entire story and just.... giving it away. All of his emotional attachment to it, as a Quirk, as his Quirk, as part of a legacy connecting him to All Might, One For All, and what is singlehandedly keeping him in his current place in society (since at this point he wasn't allowed to be smart anymore), and he just throws it away to Bakugou.

And then, to top it off, it just comes back to him. Some Fucking How(TM). And, because this is, again, one of the foundational parts of the fucking story, that just leaves... so many questions. So many.

Like. If the Quirk could yeet itself from hosts it doesn't like, could AFO ever really take it? Or would it Yeet Thyself from his body, and presumably take a copy of AFO with it in the process (and doesn't that mean, since there was that nod to this happening in canon, that Izuku should have Explosion now? That he literally, by Hori's own logic, has taken that fundamental core of Bakugou's character, and should be in the perfect place to invalidate his entire, badly managed and over all atrocious 'character arc'?).

Really, the more I think on this, the more I realize that that is proof that, not only was Explosion drastically warped to contort to Hori's whims, but so was OFA; OFA, originally, was just supposed to support Izuku, as an assistance to his character, but as time passed, it became clear that that was no longer true, and Izuku only existed to assist OFA. And no, I'm not even talking about the actual person, I'm talking about the set of powers Izuku's entire purpose in the story had been reduced to helping display on demand.

And the fact that, looking at it with that symbolism in mind, that movie's ending was a perfectly horrible encapsulation of what happened in the overall story, of Izuku handing his entire self identity over to Bakugou, for him to take and use however the hell he wanted.

...Fuck, that's depressing. Really, honestly, I wonder why the hell Izuku even exists. Seriously. It's clear that Hori doesn't want him, and he wants all the good Izuku things to go to Bakugou; there's plenty of manga and anime with an asshole of a main character, although a lot of early things would have to be changed to explain how that'd work...

I wonder, but I actually know that answer: beyond needing a more acceptable hero, beyond changing plans, having Bakugou as the focus the way Izuku was would, A, put a spotlight on the traits of him Hori clearly wanted to avoid doing, and B, would put more pressure on Hori to make Bakugou change in way he so clearly wasn't allowed to do, to make the reality of him match up with the narrative version so many people love (You could argue that Izuku, in a similar place, stopped changing after awhile, but at the same time his complete lack of growth is the main reason why the people stopped liking him anymore, because he stopped feeling like a person, and one of the major reasons the second half of the story became so overwhelmingly shit, to the point even people just casually enjoying the story on a surface level read couldn't miss; combining that clusterfuck with Bakugou's shit characterization is probably the only reason Hori didn't just... have Izuku die at some point so Bakugou could flat out replace him, along with shallow nods to their 'rivalry' (like this movie!) to help the story sell).

...I've gotten off topic. So, to sum up: No. No, I hate it, it's terrible, I'm glad I've never had to actually watch it happen.

#ask #bnha critical #mha critical #bakugou critical #Some Fucking How(TM)#izuku deserves better #this took way too long

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drconstellation · 2 days

Text

A Tale of Two Peacocks

The Relationship Between Gabriel and Michael

Some weeks ago I said I would take on the challenge of looking at the relationship between Gabriel and Michael, then I got sidetracked writing something else* - which is not always a bad thing. But I want to return to this because its too good not to do a post on it, and before I get too deeply involved in the other writing.

This is definitely going to involve some NSWF language - hey, I can't help this, its in the script - so the bulk of this is going to be below the cut. But the short of it is, they have a fairly low opinion of each other.

We need to go back to S1, where there is an interesting set of parallel scenes we should start our discussion with that spells it out for us. The first one is in S1xE2, and the other is actually in one of the deleted scenes from the cold opening of S1xE3, and they both use parallel characters to inform us of what Gabriel and Michael think of each other.

It turns out I've already talked about the first one, in this meta here, where I discuss how Newt is a parallel for Crowley.

Then [Frobisher] power-walks past. Newt is not even worth her time stopping for. "Need a hand, Dick?" *Snort* - and ouch. That's a below-the belt joke. She's just called him a wanker. In the US you might use the term jerk instead. Someone who's a bit egotistical and more in it for themselves than others. (and I never thought I'd be fact-checking the meaning of this word ever, but there's always a first time...) She's basically just equated him Gabriel, in my book (and in more ways than one.)

And I wrote all that months before I started writing my Crowley-Gabriel parallel/foil series, too.

The other thing about this first parallel scene is the character of Frobisher, who is dressed very much like a demon, but is actually the parallel character to Michael, as we see later on in the paintball fight at Tadfield Manor.

(Er, I know this is all a bit 2nd/3rd hand evidence, but the second scene is a bit more direct, so bear with me.)

The second one, in S2xE3, is the deleted bookshop opening scene.

Source: Script for the unaired scene of Aziraphale opening his bookshop in 1800

Oh, look at that. Somebody is being called a wanker. Again. This time it's Crowley calling Michael a wanker, however, and its only one step to the side with Crowley being a parallel character to Gabriel (and I challenge you to watch s1 again in this light after finishing this post, and see how many similarities you can see between Crowley and Gabriel showing through even back then.)

OK. So we've established that Gabriel and Michael both think each other are wankers at this point, but what else can we find out about them?

Peacock Fighting

I've written a couple of posts about peacock symbolism. Firstly, Michael is strongly associated with having many eyes - their Ophanim ring, their costume has eye motifs, and they are essentially head of surveillance for Heaven. So this made me think they might be the peacock referred to in the Job minisode.

But later, after more research, it became apparent the lines paraphrased in Job were definitely referring to Gabriel. (See also Judgement Day.) There are associations with both royalty and vanity there.

They are both peacocks, but for different reasons.

And they are also both in competition with one another.

Gabriel Doesn't Have A Desk

Desks are a symbol of power in western society.

The bigger, and more solid the desk in a corporate office, the higher up the person is.

The teacher at the front of the room, the authority in the room, has a bigger desk than the students.

Those desks offer protection to the person in authority sitting behind them. They mark a separation between that said authority and the masses they command on the other side. Only the most trusted get to come around to the same side that they are sitting on to be more intimate with them.

At work, your desk is connected to your identity there. Its your place in the organization. You may even individualize it with decorations.

Just take a look at what Newt was bringing on his first day to work in S1xE2:

Pens, a pen holder, notepads, a ball of rubber bands, a plant (a bromeliad, a plant that does well in fully shaded damp environments, just like Hell) and some rations. Er, I mean lunch. Given to him by God Frances his mother.

The travesty of the modern trend of "hot desking" is de-personalizing the employee. They are no longer a valued employee with a valued place, they're just another faceless cog in the grind.

We see Michael behind a desk as Duty Officer in S2. It's starkly clean and sharp and made of glass, as we would expect to find in Heaven. It's used a shield and badge of office when we see them fulfilling that role.

Michael doubts Gabriel has a desk, although Gabriel insists he does, even though we have never seen it. Yet he still requires the proverbial archive box for moving locations?

I'm just going to leave the parallel between Newt and Gabriel there for further discussion. Please do remember the bottom falls out of Newt's box in the car park, leaving him with an empty box, too.

(Muriel has a glass desk, too, but interestingly they don't have a chair. You might like to compare their encounter with Aziraphale in the Job minisode to the escapade with Crowley in the present day. There is volumes said without words.)

Just while we are on the subject of desks, thought you might like to compare Crowley's and Aziraphale's desks as well. They are always on about how much paperwork they have to do!

Sovereign versus Disciplinary Power

This is eventually going to turn into a discussion about fate versus free will at some point, but I do need to talk about the different types of power first, because I haven't done my long promised Power and Authority meta yet. The two concepts are closely related, and Gabriel and Michael are each acting as foils for a side of the concepts.

Gabriel represents sovereign power, the supreme legitimate power of the state. Power and action trickles down from the top, and punishment is almost a show of entertainment, but one designed to educate. "Oh, those angels Fell - if I do something bad, I might Fall, too!" And so Gabriel expects to Fall when he is given his trial, and Aziraphale when he lies to save Job's children.

Michael is representing disciplinary power, something that lies at the heart of society today. This is where power is spread among individuals, and individuals are more likely to do their own discipline merely because of an overhanging threat of a possibility they may get caught if they do.** Are they being watched? Who might see and report their transgression? Michael has eyes (and ducks) everywhere... So does Orwell's book 1984.

This is a very simplistic view, of course - reality is more complex than that, and is usually a combination of the two, but we have to start somewhere.

Now lets throw the fate vs free will components into the mix. Let us revisit the story of King Cnut and the tide.

The story, if you are not familiar with it, is that Cnut had his throne set on the beach and commanded the incoming tide to halt where it was, and not to wet his robes or feet. Of course, the tide kept rising and splashed the king, where he leapt up and declared his might and power as a king worthless compared to that of God. The story is meant to demonstrate his piety before Heaven, and that he was not the ultimate controller of all things - his sovereign power was limited.

They say time and tide*** wait for no man - we are at the mercy of what ever fate they bring us, and we can't manipulate that. That's decided by the supreme power, the ultimate sovereign power, so to speak.

Gabriel tends to take this line - he does not have control over the summoning of the Four Horsepeople, they are just happening as they supposed to, and that's not his department. Plausible deniability, baby! Back channels? What back channels, Michael?

So if you did want to have some power over it, some free will to control outcomes? But hang on - every one else has free will as well. Sounds a bit chaotic. Who's in charge? Nobody. Everybody. Welcome to Michael's world. They want the power, they're prepared to fight for it, for what they think is right - but so is everyone else.

But what if you were the creator of free will itself? Would you be The One to have control over time and the tides?

Tadfield Manor, Again

Michael is the archangel who throws Lucifer down from Heaven, and we see this play out at Tadfield Manor during the paintball fight, when we are shown that it is actually Frobisher/Michael who shoots the shot that hits Norman/Lucifer in the heart - although we are initially made to think its Nigel/Gabriel who did it. (One day I will teach my self how to make GIFs and make a GIF of this.)

Frobisher is the more competitive one at all times - she is the only other employee besides the naive Newt to put their hand up when Nigel asks who is looking forward to the Training Initiative and she asks Crowley and Aziraphale "Who's winning?" as she runs past them inside - to which Crowley presciently declares "You're all going to lose."

If you look at the extended scene in light of the above, you can see sovereign authority of senior manager Nigel/Gabriel is still floating around as a rather toothless tiger to the whims of fate, while everyone else is exercising their free will and disciplinary powers to try and control one another. And, as Crowley says, nobody wins. It's a lose-lose situation.

Michael is competing for an empty dream.

Gabriel is trying his best to survive something that is not what it seems.

And...I think I'll leave it there. Thanks for reading.

*I've started writing a multi-chapter human AU fanfic. But I'm a slow writer, and I'm not writing it in a linear fashion - because it has to be stuffed full of meta, of course - so I decided I better pull myself out of it before I got pulled in too far and finish a couple of things off so you didn't think I'd disappeared completely. I wasn't planning on doing one, but you know how these things go - one day an idea just pops into your head, the next thing the characters are talking to you and taking on their own life and a couple of thousand words later...

**There was a post about the oculus, the round skylight window in the roof of the bookshop and the Panopticon, an infamous prison design where the prisoners can all see each other but can't see if the guard is watching them, but of course I've lost track of it, haven't I.

***The tides are controlled by the Moon and Sun, and ostensibly for this argument, by Heaven as well. They are fated to continue in their set orbit and/or path through the sky - or the Earth on it's orbit around the Sun, is probably the better way of looking at it.

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens meta #crowley #archangel gabriel #archangel michael #good omens analysis #tadfield manor #deleted bookshop scene #peacocks #job minisode #he doesn't have a desk #power and authority #fate vs free will #newton pulsifer #angel muriel #37th order scrivener

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cordeliawhohung · 3 days

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People are so fucking outrageous you take some time for yourself that you told us you were taking and now they're up in your asks demanding stuff tell them to pay you for it, sincerely someone who doesn't mind waiting for whatever you post

on god i literally spent the last few days driving hours on end and just got back yesterday, today is my first full day back home. and i've been traveling out of town for the outreach clinic i have to work at the next few weeks, and even then i've still been writing allskdjf

lmfao i don't want to shit on that anon too much, and i'm def not trying to be rude or anything, but i'm also going to hijack your ask real quick to address stuff since i do have quite a few new followers.

while some users might not mind questions regarding when someone is updating/if they have anything planned for an ongoing series, and things like that, i specifically have it in my rules to please not do that, which is why i got a little short with them even though they arguably weren't being rude or malicious (unlike a few anons in the past have when asking things like that). this one is especially annoying because it's been literally eight days since i last updated for that, and i have other series i've been working on! like even though i'm not posting for it, i've still written a couple thousand words for pet!au, and i just finished a chapter for in limbo i'll have up for early access here in a bit, and then on tumblr probably tomorrow or wednesday.

but mostly, the reason why i specifically request that people don't ask if i have plans/when i'm updating/if i'm updating something is because i literally have an irl life. i've been pretty open recently about how i've been traveling and the work i've been doing, it's not a secret or anything lmao. it just feels... tone deaf, you know? like you come into my inbox not talking about the work, or what you like about it, or otherwise engaging with it, but just to ask if i'm giving you more, like i didn't just do that a week ago. hell, even if it's been months or years that's still rude imo because if you like something enough, then you'd probably be doing more than just asking for more, ya know? at least that's how it comes across to me. and like i said before, some people really don't care, which is why i made sure to specify it in my rules, because i do care. it ruins my mood to write and create because then it feels like a chore and people are waiting on me just to consume it and then beg for more rather than tell me what they actually enjoyed about the work lmao.

anyway, no hard feelings against that anon at all, i'm sure they didn't mean anything by it, so please don't show them any hate or anything. but just use this as a reminder to read the rules of the blogs you interact with please. or at least don't be surprised when you do something that irks them and then they're annoyed at you because of it lmao.

sorry about the rant in the tags

#core responds #like i think i even wrote a little blurb in in answer about ps!gaz yesterday or something like that too #about his breeding kink lmao #and like how else am i supposed to respond to that type of ask besides yes or no?#like i'm not going to spoil what i have planned #that was also supposed to be a fun little series to work on inbetween my larger projects #and now it feels like a chore!#i'm glad you all love the man but #you act like i haven't written 22 things for him since april #i am not an endless content machine and that's what those asks make me feel like!!!#also why do i get those asks RIGHT when i start talking about something else?#like my mafia au?#speaking of that #i actually forgot to add a lot of my mafia au drabbles to my 2024 works #i'm actually at a 180k words for this year!#so literally!!!#i am writing so fucking much!#180k words in a little over 5 months!!!#and it's still “are you writing more”#fucking hell #okay rant over i've got like 5k words of in limbo to edit #actually no not over #i wrote literally 3k fucking words today #imagine working all day and being proud of yourself and posting about it and someone has to come in and be like “but what about this series #what about it bro?#i'll fucking get to it #i get you don't have to read every series i put out but let me work at my own damn pace #okay rant over for real now otherwise i will lose my marbles

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thedamselzelda · 3 days

Text

Italian Dreams Ripped At The Seams

Author Chat: The first "chapter" of whatever I'm going to name this series. I'm not entirely sure yet, haven't settled on a name. BUT I have been DYING to post and get the ball rolling. I am in nursing school and I am writing almost everyday when I get home. the ideas are within my notes app, it's just the struggle of sitting down to do it.

Featuring: DarkEra! Dazai Osamu

Summary: Silence, it's something to fear in an already unstable world. In yours, it could mean anything. Your thoughts race as you think to yourself what the silence, the lack of communication, could actually mean, especially when that silence is caused by Dazai.

word count: 3k, fem!reader, pm!reader, sfw (light cursing), reader is occasionally called "Izanami" a nickname given to her bc of her ability (I'll let you try to figure that one out, until then stay tuned), reader is described as having violet eyes bc of her father (mentioned within this chapter) warnings: mentioned of self-harm, suicide attempt

The ceiling of the Italian Villa’s on-suite bathroom was one that could rival the Sistine Chapel ceiling, or at least, you think so. You’d never actually been or had even thought about it while living your life in Yokohama. Perhaps, now with your excruciatingly long stay in Italy, you would find yourself wandering into the building to admire another country’s history and artwork.

But that is not why you were staring at the ceiling, instead you were mulling through your thoughts of the past week or so. The shortened phone calls, now completely devoid of them, between you and… well he wasn’t exactly your boyfriend. Or was he? You two had openly expressed your feelings, you two fucked around without a care, but was he even exclusively yours?

You scrunched your nose at the thought. That wasn’t exactly the part that irked you. What bothered you was that he had abruptly stopped calling and sending his sweet letters to you six months into your “study abroad” trip that Mori had all but shoved you out for. He was always honest with you, and you with him, so what would change his perception of you now? Was he tired of you? Was he simply that bothered by your leave that distance does not, in fact, make the heart grow fonder?

You splashed more water onto your chest, resting in the warm bath, hoping it would alleviate the migraine that had accumulated while working today. Your last phone call with him wasn’t long enough. It was so short you could remember every syllable that fell from his lips.

“Mori gave him the Silver Oracle, but of course I told him I’d help him even without it.”

“Well, you’re his friend. Did he not believe you?” You brushed your hair, hoping the smell of formaldehyde had been washed away with your evening shower.

“You know he did, but I could still hear some reservations when I spoke to him. Also, you really gotta talk to him about his ‘no killing’ policy.”

You breathe out a laugh, “Look, he’s been wanting me to read those books for the longest. His mantra is his. I’m just gonna let him do him.”

Dazai sighed, knowing far too well that even if your friendship with Oda rivaled that of his, not even you could persuade him. “Oh, I also had to work with your fath- I mean, Hirotsu. I tossed him my game and he totally fucked up my win streak.”

Your eyebrow twitched at hearing the intentional mess up. “Osamu, just commit to the bit next time. Also, why would you even toss your game to him.”

Dazai chucked on the other side of the receiver, “I had work to do.”

“Oh yes, big mister executive had to go clean up my father’s mess. I see.”

You didn’t hear anything from him for a moment. You knew he was smiling, but it was a solemn one. He knew how much you wanted to be executive. You were born into the mafia, he wasn’t. While it wasn’t technically a birthright, the two of you felt like it was meant to be yours. Pushing back to the previous topic, you spoke again.

“Tell Oda that I’m looking forward to getting a letter from him. He didn’t pick up the phone the last time I called, but it sounds like he’s quite busy with whatever Mori has tasked him with.”

Dazai hummed to you in response, picking his next words carefully. Slipping into rough Italian, as if he couldn’t let anyone know, and spoke, “I’m worried about him.”

Your mouth curled into a frown, placing the brush down on the vanity. You picked your phone up, taking it off speaker, and placing it to your ear.

“How so?” you reply back, your Italian just as rough.

“He’s…” You could tell Dazai hadn’t had as much experience in the language, having only learned it to speak with you while you were in Italy. It was much more help than he could realize, as you were barely able to converse with your mentor, with your native tongue being Japanese and only knowing basic English. Dazai attempted to keep speaking, “He’s up against a skill rival to his. I just don’t foresee any outcome with this group going well.”

You hum back to him this time, unsure of what to say. You had heard through your contacts about this rival group, Mimic. Now, they had taken Ango, one of Dazai’s friends, your acquaintance. You knew dealing with any foreign group such as this always resulted in death, something you were intimately familiar with, so the thought didn’t plague you too much. Rather, the tone of Dazai’s voice and his words meant that it was Oda who could be the one at the center.

You cease speaking Italian, “I’m sure, whatever the outcome, the four of us will end up at Bar Lupin, clinking our drinks together and laughing about all of this in…” You think to yourself how much longer this sentence is, “three and a half years?”

Dazai puffs into the receiver, whining, “That’s too far from now. I’m gonna have to tell Mori I require a much-needed vacation to Italy real soon.”

You laugh, flopping down onto your down bed with satin sheets, “I would like that very much.”

The two of you fall silent, your eyes growing heavier and heavier. The silence was common toward the end of your phone calls. Sometimes, you could swear he would stay on just to hear the sound of your soft breathing. You would have, if that insomniac would ever fall asleep.

“Bella, you can go to sleep. You’ll get my letter tomorrow. Just imagine I’m reading it to you.”

“It’s not the saammme.” You groan, throwing your arm over your eyes. “I get why Mori would send me here but fuck for four years?! I would serve the organization better if I was there!”

Dazai was silent, almost as if he didn’t want to agree or disagree with your statement.

“He said it was to hone your ability now that he couldn’t focus on you anymore, so I suppose it’s for the Mafia’s benefit more so than yours. You know where I stand regardless.”

“I know.” You voice was light, emphasizing your feelings.

“I’ll be the one that picks you up from the airport, though. I’ll even sweep you up and spin you around if it gives you something to look forward to.”

You roll over, smiling into your pillow.

“You’re definitely going to be dreaming about that now.” He laughs, possibly daydreaming about it already himself.

You chuckle, smothering your flushed face.

“Get some rest, cara mia. I’ll talk to you again in a few days.” His voice was soothing and low in tone, as if he knew his voice was lulling you to sleep.

“Talk to you soon, mon cher.” You sleepily say, waiting for him to end the call-but he doesn’t. You knew he was waiting for you to fall asleep, your eyes closing until you found yourself opening them again in the morning.

You open your eyes once more gazing upon the painted ceiling above you. It had been a week since then, placing you back into your thoughts on why he hadn’t called, written, or at least attempted to contact you in some other form. Even Oda and Mori hadn’t spoken to you. Which placed you in even more confusing thoughts. Surely, you thought to yourself, surely Mori wasn’t eliminating you from the Mafia. If that were the case, you would have already been killed and disposed of, and the mistress of the Villa, nor your mentor were acting anything out of the normal.

You gaze down, pinching the bridge of your nose. Any more thinking on this topic and surely your head would explode, which would be an invited reprieve at this particular moment. Your eyes dance down to the water, noticing your scar, which was deformed by the refracting water. One on your arm, you reached over to touch, remembering how you and Dazai had taken a knife across your arms hoping for it to be a beautiful double suicide, but alas, Mori found the two of you. He stitched up Dazai, forcing you to stitch up your own wound. You could feel a tear breech and slide down your cheek.

The great Izanami does not cry.

You grab onto the porcelain tub, pressing yourself deeper into the water, forcing your neck, then your face into the water. You open your eyes underneath the water, holding yourself there. Perhaps, if Dazai is done with you-if Oda is done with you-then maybe this is how you should go. You release some air from your lungs, allowing you to sink further under the water. You release your hands from the sides, submerging them, too.

Your lungs begin to burn, screaming for you to go up for air, but you refuse. You blink as you hear a garbled voice within the bathroom. If it is the mistress, there was nothing she could do to stop you. One touch and she would be gone. She knew the rule when it came to you. You blink again, seeing a dark outlined figure standing above the tub. You think to yourself, maybe it is him. However, if it is, he would have already pulled you up. So, it couldn’t be.

You find yourself gasping at fresh air as someone pulls you up from behind, their small hands snaking under your arms.

“Honestly, could you please not kill yourself? I’ve invested too much into you.”

You blink as your eyes burned slightly from the water falling from your lashes. A hand towel is handed to you, and you wipe your face roughly before looking behind you.

“Thank you, Elise.” Mori says sweetly to the girl. She rolls her eyes at you, annoyed that she had to soak her dress to retrieve you.

“What are you doing here?” You say in a harsh tone, irritated that he has interrupted yet another attempt.

“I can come and go as I please, since I am the one funding this education of yours.” His voice returns to the irritated, tired tone that he always uses with you. He’s taken a seat at the chair beside the tub, placing a medium navy-blue box tied in gold ribbon on the side table along with a tan file folder.

“I haven’t heard from you in a week. So, I ask again, what are you doing here?” You become irritated by his intrusion, and deviation from your original question.

You sit up within the tub, not caring for his gaze upon you. He was your technical guardian after all, and you knew his interest in young girls. However, you were unbothered by his now as you neared adulthood, his interest had wavered in you increasingly. The only thing that bound the two of you now was his ownership of you and your ability.

“I suppose you were going about your days here in the villa, wondering what the outcome was with Mimic, since I suppose he told you a bit about the issue.”

Mori was visibly irritated, testing to see how much Dazai told you via your late-night calls. The two of you knew it was very risky to converse about such delicate matters, regardless of what form they were put into. However, you longed to be home, so Dazai had frequently indulged you.

“I just know Oda was involved. That’s all.” You tone was steady, you had lied to Mori countless times before, this time was evidently no different.

He arched his eyebrow, studying your face. “It doesn’t matter now. It’s resolved anyway. We got the permit.”

He closed his eyes in thought. You in turn began to study him, curious as to why he would come to the villa just to inform you of the Port Mafia’s success.

“That can’t be the only reason you’re here.” You turn in the tub, your legs folding into your chest as you cock your head. “To what to I truly owe this intrusion, Mori?”

He slowly opened his eyes to look at you. His eyes darted between your violet ones, formulating his next words. “Sakunosuke Oda unfortunately passed during the fight against Mimic.”

Your eyes widen as you lean forward. You breathe out the only word that can formulate against your thoughts. A broken, “No,” escaping your lips.

Mori closes his eyes once more, leaning his head forward slightly, “And Dazai has disappeared. We do not know his whereabouts.”

“What?!” You spring up from the tub, water splashing about the floor and onto Elise and Mori. Elise groans, reaching for a bigger towel and tossing it to you. You wrap it around your body, attempting to create your next sentence against your pounding headache. “No, he… he would have said something. He would have contacted me. He wouldn’t…”

Your words trailed off as if they couldn’t follow your thoughts.

“Therefore, I came here because you needed to be informed of your new position. Or rather, the one you will take on once you finish here in Italy.”

You could barely hear him over your last conversation with Dazai playing out once more in your head.

"I’ll talk to you again in a few days… You’ll get my letter tomorrow.”

You hadn’t actually received the letter, which is what triggered your incessant thoughts. You had gone up to the mistress, day after day, asking if the letter had arrived, yet nothing came.

“While I am completely optimistic that Dazai will return.” Your eyes narrowed, anger seething from your gritted teeth. “I am leaving his executive position open for his return. In the meantime, you will assume a specially made executive position, and I have the documents to a club and a casino I would like for you to have control over to start with.”

He tapped to the file next to the navy-blue box.

“What’s the box for then?” Your eyes glance to the beautifully decorated box, curious to what could be contained within it.

“Dazai passed it to me a few days before he left, wanted me to send it to you. Instead, I thought it would soften the blow of the pervious news.” His hand fanned over the box in a presenting motion. “It’s been screened of course. Couldn’t have a defected member sending you something that would cause my newest executive to defect too.”

He gave a sly smile. He knew of your relationship with Dazai, but he also knew you feared a life without the Mafia more.

You sneered at him, “Why would I want that from a defected member?”

Your words were merely show, something to appease Mori since you had just been given your prize, however, it wasn’t for all your hard work of the past years. Rather, it was desperation on Mori’s part to hold you closer within his clutches.

“My, my… I didn’t expect you to be so cold when it comes to Dazai.” Mori stood chuckling but leaving the box behind anyway.

He began to walk toward the closed bathroom door, Elise opening it to escape the humid air within the room. He turned on his heel, however, before breeching back into your private room.

“I expect greatness from you, Izanami. Do not fail me.” It echoed within your head as more of an order, rather than a statement.

You emit a low growl at the name, hating to hear it from him of all Mafia members.

He smiled, pleased by your response, and closed the door behind him.

You wait for a moment, listening for the next click of the door being closed. Once you heard the faint noise of Mori’s departure, you scrambled, nearly slipping, from the tub. You grabbed the plush robe from the chair, donning it instead of the towel you had been holding up. Once you had tied the robe, you tear the gold ribbon from the box, haphazardly letting it flutter to the floor. Your hands hesitate with the lid. What if he knew he was leaving? What if…?

You sit down in the chair, placing the heavy midnight box within your lap. You take a deep breath, lifting the lid and placing it upon the file. Your fingers gingerly graze the gray tissue covering the contents, trembling. You notice a splash of darkness appearing on the gray paper. You harshly rub the remaining tears from your cheeks.

Why are you so afraid to look? To see the last thing he’s left you? Because it’s the last. There is no more Dazai. He’s dead as far as the, now, executive you are concerned, but the young girl in you? The one who’s lost the one person on this God-forsaken earth that could touch you without consequence? She was afraid.

You began to peel back the tissue paper, first noticing the maroon color peeking out within the box. Your finger grazed upon the soft material as you remove the right covering paper. Your fingers go to touch your lips, a small choking gasp escaping through them as your tears now forcefully fall from your eyes. It was a scarf he had bought because you had remarked how it complemented his eyes, yet he could never bring himself to wear it, stating it reminded him too much of Mori. You attempted to pick it up from within the box, but you discovered the additional contents that had been wrapped within. Three books, all too familiar to you shifted underneath the scarf. You could hear yourself begin to sob as you picked up the last remaining things of Oda’s clutching the items to your chest. You pressed your face into the scarf, hoping to find some comfort, smelling burnt gunpowder and a faint woody scent, reminiscent of him.

You could barely see through your tears, almost missing the final present that graced you.

In Italian, evident that he attempted way too many times to write the note, Happy Birthday, Bella. All my love. ~O <3

If I forgot to tag anything, or forgot to mention anything in the warnings, please let me know! I'm still just trying to figure all this out after using Wattpad for so long.

Thank you to everyone who reads this though! Hope you enjoy and look forward to what's to come!

#dazai x reader #dazai osamu x reader #dazai x y/n #bsd dazai #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs #bsd x you #darkera Dazai

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qveerthe0ry · 21 hours

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Lions Ain't the Kind - Part 3.5

Summary: Frankie asks you about transitioning Pairing: Frankie Morales x NB/Gender-fluid! AFAB! Reader Rating: 18+ Explicit Warnings: 18+ mdni, talks about gender non-conformity, talks about gender dysphoria, mentions of transitioning, mentions of HRT and gender affirming surgery, chest binding, use of packers A/N: I said I wasn't going to post anymore of this series until July but I was WRONG! I wote this for @romanarose 's Pride Event. Week 2: Transitioning. I realized that writing this little snippet would actually add a lot of depth to reader and explain more about what their gender identity means to them (while also reiterating that Frankie is a perfect little sweetie pie)

“Do you ever want to get surgeries? You know, like, gender affirming ones?”

You pause Netflix to turn to Frankie, shirtless and looking at you with genuine curiosity.

“Why do you ask?”

His brows draw up.

“Just wondering. This is all kinda new to me, I guess, and I’ve done some research… I just know it’s an option and— yeah, I mean— I really am just curious.”

The backs of his knuckles trace your arm, and goosebumps form there.

“That’s a bit of a loaded question, honestly. Do you want the short answer or the long answer?”

He smiles, soft, and you swear he’s an angel with that halo of curls framing his head.

“I wanna know whatever you wanna tell me.”

You smile too, tangle your legs with his under the sheets and get relaxed for the conversation you’ve never been so comfortable having before now.

“So… basically, I think the pros and cons completely stalemate each other. You know? There are things about hormones and surgery that I’d enjoy. But… because I’m so fluid, I’d also sometimes not enjoy them. Does that make sense?”

Frankie nods, “I think so, yeah.”

“And that’s the thing— Right now, there are things about my natural body that sometimes I like, and then sometimes those same things make me uncomfortable.”

“Dysphoria?” He asks, a timid and sad tone weighing down the word.

“Yeah— exactly. Look at you, Mister Research.”

A bashful dimple appears as he ducks his head.

“So, there’s things I have that help. They’re temporary… but… so is the dysphoria. I think, for me, the best decision is to lean into those temporary aides. I mean for one, it’s cheaper. And much less invasive. Why go through all of that just to be in the same boat, y’know?”

“Yeah, I get that. I’m sorry you have to compromise, though. Sounds… Not easy.”

You shrug, but you’re smiling, because it’s quite thrilling to have someone so understanding in your corner, and your bed, and your life.

“Thank you. You’re right, y’know, it isn’t easy. Especially when it comes to dating. So it’s really nice that you’re… Well— that you’re you.”

A surprised breath leaves him as his eyes light up.

“It’s nice that you’re you, too. I like you, everything about you.”

It’s silent for a moment as you stare at each other, smiling, sunny, giddy almost.

“What— umm… What are those things that help? You don’t have to tell me, but… If you want to, I’d like to know.”

You nod.

“Yeah okay.”

You take a deep breath and debate on what would be easiest to start with.

“You know how you asked me what those marks were on my back yesterday? In the shower?”

“Yeah, you said it was just indents from your blanket. Were they not?”

You shake your head.

“I use this stuff called transtape. It’s used to bind your chest, you know? So it looks flat? Sometimes it leaves little marks— like a bandaid would.”

“So it’s like a binder? But… tape, instead of a garment?”

“Exactly. I was wearing it that day you… it’s why I haven’t really let you touch, yet. It’s kind of unsexy to explain in the moment.”

“Why didn’t you wear it in the shower? Should I not have looked?”

Worry creases his brow, but you huff a laugh and grab his hand.

“No, it’s okay. I wanted to shower with you, and I needed to replace it anyway. It— I mean, like I’ve said, sometimes it bothers me and sometimes it doesn’t. I felt like we were in a rush, and it wasn’t… sexual. And I felt comfortable with you like that. I knew you wouldn’t gawk or… comment, or anything. I liked being able to just be myself with you, and having you still see me as me.”

“Oh, okay. I mean… I liked what I saw. Is that… okay to say?”

You roll your eyes and laugh.

“Yes, you’re allowed to like my tits, Pretty Boy.”

He flushes, but his eyes glance down to your chest in a brief flicker.

“You’re wearing the tape, now?”

“I am. Do you wanna see?”

“I— I mean, yeah. If you wanna show me.”

So you do. You slowly slide your shirt off, and you bare yourself. You feel confident, which is new, in a situation like this.

He stares, like he’s studying you. His eyes take catalog of the different pieces, the way they’re shaped, the way they hold everything up and back and flatten.

His fingers twitch under yours, and you squeeze them before letting go.

“You can touch,” you whisper.

He does. In an instant, his fingers gently trace the edge of the tape, then his palm covers it all, right over your heart that’s pounding.

“You’re so… fuck, I’m sorry, I don’t wanna be weird. You’re just really hot.”

You do preen a bit, even if you don’t want to admit it. He makes you feel so good about who you are.

“That’s not weird. I think you’re hot too, so it’s good we’re on the same page.”

He hums, traces his middle finger down the center of your chest, so light it tickles.

“What else?”

“Huh?”

“There’s more, right? More… aides?”

You nod slowly.

“You know what a packer is?”

He nods slowly.

“I’ve read about them. I haven’t seen one.”

“I haven’t worn one around you. It could be confusing at first, right?”

You feel sweat start to prickle at the back of your neck.

“It could be, yeah. I get that. You can, now. You always could have, you know?”

“Yeah, I know, now.”

He clears his throat, and gives you a signature Frankie grin, and the room starts to feel a little less stifling.

“If you want to show me, I’d like to see. I wanna know everything about you, when you’re ready for me to.”

You debate for a minute, how to show him, which one to show him, before you get out of bed and duck down to grab the box that’s under your bed frame.

“I have a few, they’re all different,” you start to explain.

You set the box next to him, then crawl into bed too, and unhook the latches on the lid.

He sits patiently as you open it, and you’re afraid to look at him when they’re revealed.

“That’s a lot of penises. Peni?”

You choke on an awkward, startled laugh and shake your head.

“I know, I know.”

“No, it’s cool. I wish I could have a different dick for each occasion.”

And he’s laughing with you, not at you, and you finally brave a look at his face.

His eyes run curious circles around the inside of the box, but when he notices you watching him, his gaze falls on you again.

“Tell me about them.”

So you do.

You explain that the smaller one is easiest to wear in public without feeling awkward, but still feeling euphoric. The mid-sized one is usually for the odd occasion where you go out to clubs or bars or other queer spaces. The biggest one, you tell him, is for when you’re just at home, and you want to be able to look in the mirror and see you, on those days where you need to be as masculine as possible.

“What about this one? It’s smaller too.”

“It’s uhh… well, it’s a 3-in-1.”

“What does that mean?”

You pull it out of the box to show him the back of it.

“So this is like— so I can pee standing up. And then this” you say, grabbing the rod that’s lying in the box, “is to make it hard. So I can penetrate, or ‘jerk off’ with it. I don’t wear it out much, except for maybe when I’m gonna be out all day and I don’t know the bathroom situation.”

You look up to find his eyes and mouth both wide.

“That’s sick,” he says, then swiftly adds— “in a good way. I didn’t know that was a thing.”

You hum and nod.

“Do you… wish you were wearing one? Right now?”

And it’s kinda weird, the way he asks so innocently, but you really do. Especially with the way you’re shirtless and taped up right in front of him.

“Kinda, yeah.”

“Can I see it? You can say no. But— how does it work? Like, is it secure?”

You place your 3-in-1 back in the box, and grab your medium sized one.

“Let me show you.”

You’re already wearing your favorite briefs to pack with. You have a lot of pairs and they’re comfy with or without. So you shed your sweatpants and get up on your knees to show him.

“There’s a secret pocket in here,” you tell him, “these aren’t good for the 3-in-1, since the pocket is between the packer and my skin. But I have different underwear for those.”

He nods, and watches you pull the waistband down to show him the pocket.

“You could keep snacks in there, too.”

You laugh at the silly look in his eyes.

“Not sure they’d be that good, all pressed up against my crotch.”

“I’d eat ‘em,” he says, and wiggles his eyebrows for good measure.

“Noted,” you joke, “so— yeah, I just, put it in here.”

And you do, sliding the packer into place and fiddling the waistband back.

“I mean, usually I look in the mirror to make sure it looks right, adjust it so it doesn’t pinch anything when I walk.”

He nods as he stares at your crotch, and his hand reaches out to wrap around your thigh.

“And it feels good? To have that there?”

“Yeah, when I’m dysphoric. Just having that weight there, it feels real and right.”

He smiles at this, so wide, so sweet.

“Wear it around me. When you want to. I want you to feel that way, always. Okay?”

Your throat feels a little thick, and your eyes sting a bit, but you still smile.

“Okay,” you whisper.

“C’mere,” he whispers back.

You close your box and place it on the floor, as quick as you can. He pulls you to him tight, and it feels incredible, to have all of your bare skin against his own, finally, nothing but your tape in between you.

He kisses you without a bit of urgency, just lax and syrupy. His hand is firm against your spine, pressing you to him, and you feel dizzy when he pulls away.

“Thank you for showing me everything,” he says.

“Thanks for… just… being cool.”

He chuckles, then coaxes you on your back, so his head can take its coveted position back, over your chest. Your naked, flat chest. You hold the remote toward the TV, intent on unpausing your show, but he stops you.

“Can I hold it?”

“The remote?”

“No— your dick. Just to keep it warm? No funny business.” And he’s looking up at you with those damn eyes again, and how could you say no to that?

last part/next part

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal characters #frankie morales #x reader #sub! frankie morales #frankie morales x reader #nb reader #gender-fluid reader #frankie morales fanfiction #ppcu fanfiction #pedro pascal cinematic universe #triple frontier fanfiction #OscarPedroPrideEvent2024

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lucky-clover-gazette · 2 days

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extremely long essay-adjacent post about female representation in the captive prince

capri is interesting bc i dislike the lack of female characters, but knowing the way that people are treated in vere and akielos, i kinda feel relieved that we don’t see many women.

like idk, gender stuff is complicated. it is a double standard, that seeing female characters in the same positions as the men in these books would just feel different. given how women have been treated and continue to be treated in real life society, it’s almost escapist fantasy within itself to see this world where we don’t have to really look too hard at women being abused and oppressed. and in addition to real life, we get that in plenty of fiction already, written mostly by men, often in a way that feels condescending or fetishizing.

capri’s male-dominated cast comes at the expense of really seeing women on the page, but the few female characters do seem to be intentionally written in positions that don’t feel disempowering or misogynistic. vannes holds her position of authority through similar means to the powerful men, and she’s just as morally questionable as the rest—no exceptions are made. jokaste is authoritative simply by her characterization, and uses her femininity in as a tool to put herself in higher stations. like, that woman has a uterus and she knows how to use it to her advantage. and then there’s the vaskian women, like this entirely separate matriarchal warrior society, and we really only get a peek into whatever the hell they have going on.

we know, logically, that there are plenty of female slaves and pets and prostitutes, almost undoubtedly abused and undervalued wives of men in the nobility. the regent's court is male-dominated by choice. kastor, i would bet, is similarly misogynistic. the male characters we follow are explicit misogynists, gay and disinterested in women, or like legally forbidden from any heterosexual romance they might want to have. gender roles and sexual taboos run deep in this world. we know that women are out there, suffering, just like damen and erasmus and laurent. but pacat shows us women who are not suffering instead. and that, to me, is something.

but like, i think the instance of womanhood that’s most interesting to me in the series is actually the absence of it in laurent and damen’s lives. the characters and story we follow are so steeped in masculinity and patriarchy—but there are women in this world. they are up to things, and i think pacat has given their existence thought. i can't know her intentions for sure, but i sense that she might have made them absent in our protagonist’s lives for a reason.

becauseeeee who is the person to finally Beat the regent? a female character who you are meant to ignore, who appears to be a random bystander, but reveals herself to be mindful and caring. a woman who, just like damen and laurent in book 1, is relatively powerless in this society but left with very little to lose. loyse is the closest thing to like… a just kinda average woman we see in this entire series. she’s not partaking in the debauchery of veretian, akielion, or vaskian nobility. she’s not playing power games with her body or sexuality. she’s basically just, like, the normalest person in the room, full of people like fifteen feet deep in a pool of power struggles, sexual depravity, manipulation, politics, and war strategy. she has her head above water, at least after aimeric’s death. that isn’t a gendered quality by nature, and i hate the implication that women are more likely to be level-headed, good advocates or caretakers, etc… but i don’t think that’s what i’m trying to say here at all.

because loyse, like… isn’t a perfect mother. she either completely missed or knowingly enabled horrible things happening to her son because her husband wanted to social climb. i’m not sure if she knew, during aimeric’s childhood, exactly what was going on with guoin, the regent, and aimeric. it might say somewhere (i hope it does!) but my skimming yielded nothing. i think it would make the most sense if loyse only found out after aimeric’s death, like on the road with guion and the main characters. she clearly spoke to laurent about it at some point, and didn’t tell guion that she planned to testify against him. regardless of when she found out, she’s just over it all at the trial, and finally speaks her mind.

loyse being a woman doesn’t inherently make her more likely to be wise or compassionate than the main characters—but it’s more like, idk, being so far removed from the very male-centric story that we see, it allows a character like her to have the clarity to essentially defeat the final boss everyone else has been struggling to fight for three entire books. loyse really just said, “hi. fuck you all. my son is dead because my asshole husband made a ‘gentleman’s agreement’ with him as a bargaining chip. i’m not delusional, i know this is wrong, and im not going to shut up about it to appease this depraved and cowardly court. also the regent killed his brother, because i know you assholes don’t care about my son and never will.” and that is the first domino in the regent’s defeat.

so, like… what if damen and laurent had been written with loyses in their lives? women who weren’t there to have sex with them, in damen’s case? mothers and sisters and friends? what qualities could they have then developed in themselves, so much sooner than they do in the series?

if more of these characters were women—if more women were Involved In The Story, in general—would it have been as brutal or difficult as it was? could things have been better communicated, would social reform have happened sooner? would damen and laurent (especially laurent) have had the same experiences that so strongly define who they are? it’s a slippery slope to assign traits to gender, i know, but i think there is something to be said for the different ways men and women handle intellectual and emotional problems—especially if they’ve been socialized heavily based on their gender, which does seem to be the case for this world. if damen had a mother or a sister or a simply platonic female friend, do you think he would have more quickly realized some of his own ethical blind spots re: sex and consent? if laurent had a mother or sister or female friend, do you think he would have been protected from the regent, and given more opportunities to feel safe and unsexualized? if there were actual authoritative women in the venetian royal bloodline, would the regent have been able to take over, and make the court so male-dominated in the first place?

it’s like that meme, “x media (image of giant book), x media if character had a gun (very short book).” i think, fundamentally, that capri would not have been able to tell the same story if more female characters were involved. and to be clear—that is not an excuse to exclude female characters, because i fucking love female characters. it would almost certainly be a better series with more women thoughtfully involved, but the point is, it wouldn’t be the same. and i do admire that pacat seems to understand that there are differences between men and women, in many ways, and doesn’t just like… write a character she means to be a dude, and then genderswap. or write an character who’s in essence genderless, insert them into this very gendered society, and then spin a wheel to see what pronouns they use.

i’m not sure exactly what point i’m trying to make here, but i’ll leave two related excerpts for your consideration. actually, yes, i do know my point, and i’ll say it with conviction: simply thinking to put female characters in a story, does not make it a story with thoughtful female characters. and capri, as a series, is defined by its thoughtfulness to me. i cannot fully commit to the suggestion that its lack of female characters is inherently misogynistic, because i think that lack of female presence is a character within itself. and more than anything, it’s an ongoing flaw of fandoms in general, people in general, to either want women to be 1) absent, so they’re not in the way of the men’s stories or 2) simple and archetypical, to check a box for inclusion. but there are other options. i like those options more.

to truly want female representation in a misogynistic world is to want to see the complexity of womanhood, both in its presence and its absence. and i think if cs pacat ever decided to take on a female perspective, intentionally, as the main point of a piece of writing, it would be masterfully done. i would love to see her write women, but i want those women to truly be the main characters. and i never want to tell anyone what they should want to write about.

capri is what it is. and to its credit, i do believe that this series both considers and values the female perspective much more than the fandom seems to acknowledge. the real problem to me rests with fandom and the society it reflects, rather than the story or its author.

excerpt #1, from the summer palace by cs pacat, author of the captive prince series:

‘My mother planted these gardens,’ said Damen. His heart was pounding. ‘Do you like them? They’re ours now.’ Saying the word “ours” still felt daring. He could feel it mirrored in Laurent, the shy awkwardness of what was so dearly desired. ‘I like them,’ said Laurent. ‘I think they’re beautiful.’ Laurent’s fingers found his again, a small intimacy that had him overbrimming. ‘I don’t think about her often. Only when I come here.’ ‘You don’t take after her.’ ‘Oh?’ ‘Her statue in Ios is three feet tall.’ The corner of Damen’s mouth twitched. He knew the statue, on a plinth in the north hall. ‘There’s a statue of her here. Come and meet her.” It was part of the nonsense they were sharing, a whim, to show Laurent. He tugged; they came to an arched open garden. ‘I take it back, you’re just like her.’ Laurent said it looking up. The statue here was bigger. Damen was smiling; there was delight in seeing Laurent explore himself, a young man who was sweet, teasing, at times unexpectedly earnest. Having made the decision to let Damen in, Laurent had not gone back on it. When the walls went up, it was with Damen inside them. But when Laurent came to stand in front of the statue of his mother, the mood changed to something more serious, as if prince and statue were communicating with each other. Unlike in Patras, it wasn’t the custom in Akielos to paint statues. His mother Egeria looked out towards the sea with a marble face and marble eyes, even though she’d had dark hair and eyes like himself and his father. He saw her through Laurent’s eyes, the old-fashioned dress of marble, the curled hair, her high, classical brow and outraised arm. Damen realised that he didn’t know how tall his mother really was. He had never asked about it, and had never been told. Laurent made a formal Akielon gesture that matched his chiton and the gardens, but was different to his habitual Veretian manners. Damen felt his skin prickle with strangeness. It was part of Akielon courtship to seek permission from a parent. If things had been different, Damen might have knelt in the great hall in front of King Aleron, asking for the right to court his youngest son. It was not that way between them. All their family was dead. ‘I’ll take care of your son,’ said Laurent. ‘I’ll protect his kingdom as if it were my own. I’ll give my life for his people.’ Above them, the sun was high and bright, and encouraged a retreat to the shade line. The boughs of the trees around them were heavy with scent. Laurent said, ‘I won’t let him down. I promise you.’

and an excerpt from the captive prince fan wiki.

#capri #sam reads capri #(kinda)#captive prince #prince's gambit #kings rising #laurent of vere #damen of akielos #okay i went pretty hard on this one ngl #PLEASE share your thoughts

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