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trashquisitor-shirozora · 2 years

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Hi all!

Touched some grass, maybe touched too much grass, and got wiped out by a headache. The weekly weekday grind is about to begin so I’m going to temper my contributions to the ongoing conversations around and about the dinluke fandom.

That said, I’ve had quite a bit of catching up to do and want to say the following-

While the discourse quickly centered around dark!dinluke and dark!dinluke creators, I agree with Withercrown’s latest and other later posts from others that this group is not solely to blame for what’s been happening to this fandom. The dark!dinluke corner may be the most highly visible one and have contributed much to the toxic stereotypes, tropes, and trends that have dominated much of the fanworks we see nowadays, but they are not the only ones and cannot be solely blamed for every ill that seems to plague and diminish the ship’s fandom. There are many other fanworks that don’t share the same themes and (infamous? improper? nonexistent?) tags as the dark!dinluke corner but feature many of the same problems - racism, racialized xenophobia, homophobia, heterosexism, gendered stereotypes.

I did my part in centering the debate around them and also on the racism and xenophobia surrounding Din Djarin and Pedro Pascal with my responses to asks, my reblogs, my tags. While I know these conversations needed to be had (and they keep needing to be had, why do we keep needing to have these conversations???), I should’ve done more to highlight the other major problems with the fandom. I also didn’t speak up when discussions and headcanons fetishized and applied heterosexist ideas and tropes onto gay/MLM relationships and characters, and that’s something I need to work on. I’ve complained in private spaces many times my frustrations with characterizations of Luke in particular but never took them public. Seems like it’s time to end that.

It also bears reminding that all of these major problems with the dinluke ship and fandom that had been driving people away and reducing participation in these spaces are not separate. They are not isolated, they are not single issues to be addressed one by one. These are inter-connected and intersectional. Any effort to do better and to make a better community needs to take into account how we should approach Din and Luke as individuals and in a relationship. I do what I can while keeping in mind how Din is perceived because of his actor and I do the same for Luke (and for every other character in Star Wars, really, they all deserve this).

I’m just a human, I will fuck up (I have fucked up), but I’m always striving to correct myself, learn, and do better - for me, for the people in fandom, and for a ship I very much love.

I have a few asks in my inbox but I want to spend the rest of the night being productive with other things so I’ll address them later in the week. I’m also keeping anon asks off in the meantime for the same reasons. When will anon asks get turned back on? That’s for me to know and for you to find out.

Take care of yourselves. Do what you must for your sake. I’ll see y’all on the flip side.

#dinluke #skydalorian #tbh when I made that post I didn't expect it to blow up or kickstart another weekend of discoursing #I'm glad for it though I think we strayed too far from all the major issues Withercrown had brought up in his original post #but here's the thing - Withercrown was simply the straw that broke my camel's back #my poor camel had to bear the weight of all of my frustrations and anger toward not just dark!dinluke but other dinluke fans #I'm the poor fool who sat on that back with my silence and my fears about fandom and then that straw came down on my head #on a personal note - I hated gendered stereotypes and tropes all my life and my discomfort has led to me questioning myself #(one could argue that vico ortiz and OFMD's jim jimenez led me to seriously asking myself if I wasn't as cis as I thought I was)#that discomfort has also made me hyperaware of characters being assigned these traits and roles based on racialized and heterosexist ideas #it was never just the racism or xenophobia but also how the racism and xenophobia played into characterizing din and luke a certain way #the thing about intersectionality (besides it being really about frameworks of power and legal systems in the US) is that it is hard #it is hard work because it asks you to take into account so many facets of identity and inequality and you can lose track or focus #and it is ongoing. it never ends. so long as these systems and structures are in place we have to live and breathe it #it doesn't just go away after a weekend of volleying back and forth about statistics and identity #for me the hurt really began in 2016 with the finnpoe discourse which only worsened with The Last Jedi the next year #these hurts never left and will never leave because fandom doesn't learn doesn't do better #but I'm truly tired of being quiet and of wallowing silently in despair and of losing hope #so if I have to lob fireballs into the dinluke tag and show myself then so be it

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kanansdume · 4 months

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Hello! Your pro-Jedi posts are so precious in mostly anti-Jedi rhetoric circulating around fandom and canon (sadly). So I wanted to ask: have you read a novel Ashoka by E.K.Johnson? If you haven’t, I hope you don’t mind some spoilers and a small rant.

I didn’t expect a lot while getting to it, but it still rubbed me wrong. Cannot remember specifically, but the general idea was ‘The Jedi were so trapped in the past and dogmatic, so they’re partially to blame for their downfall’. After reading lots of Jedi-defending meta, it just hurts.

One moment I remember most, though. After Ahsoka and Bail Organa save population of a small planet, occupied by the Empire, Bail calls her a Jedi.

Ahsoka: I’m no Jedi.

Bail: But you act like one.

And I’m just: yes! Yes, you do act like a Jedi! You meditate the Jedi way, you think the Jedi way – how come you’re not a Jedi? Only because you weren’t knighted? Meta-speaking, Kanan, Ezra and Luke also weren’t fully trained by the community, but they still are Jedi. Especially in a non-Jedi Imperial world. And non-Force-sensitive population in-universe won’t see the difference between a fully-trained Jedi Knight and an almost fully-trained Jedi Padawan – they’re still ‘Jedi’ to them.

I felt like this novel enforces the current idea that Ahsoka is better that ‘those stupid old dogmatic Jedi of the Prequels’. Sorry for the rant and thanks for reading.

Thank-you, I'm glad you've liked what I've managed to contribute to the pro Jedi fandom!

As for the Ahsoka novel, I haven't read it (but I don't mind spoilers since I don't ever plan to). I read like the first two thirds of Queen's Peril and then got bored and then I started hearing some pretty nasty things about E.K. Johnston and have refused to ever pick it back up again or ever read another of her books. So I'm not at all shocked that she's part of the Jedi critical crowd. It's even LESS shocking that it came out within the Ahsoka novel, just given the way Ahsoka as a character has been going for YEARS. It sounds like it's handling the issue in the same basic way a lot of people have done, nothing unique there.

If I'm willing to try to re-interpret the "I'm no Jedi" stuff into a more pro Jedi version, Ahsoka doesn't see herself as a Jedi because, unlike all of those other characters, Ahsoka LEFT the Order before it was destroyed and before she officially completed her training and never rejoined it. Kanan never left it at all, it was just destroyed around him (the same is true for Cal Kestis from the Jedi games). And he does TECHNICALLY get Knighted by Yoda during Rebels and takes on a Padawan, hallmarks of a Jedi Knight. Ezra and Luke never had an Order to join to begin with, so their willingness to identify themselves as Jedi isn't dependent on having officially joined the right organization so much as it is about having learned from someone else who identifies as a Jedi and being told their training is complete. Both Ezra and Luke kind-of reach that point with Kanan and Yoda, so they never question their identity as Jedi.

Ahsoka is in the VERY unique position of having not been a Jedi OFFICIALLY when the Order was destroyed, which leaves her in slightly more limbo than most others. She HAD the ability to rejoin it before it was destroyed, she just didn't, and now she has to kind-of move away from the idea of needing to be a part of the Order before she can call herself a real Jedi. She also never has a master tell her she's done with training. In both Kanan and Cal's cases, their masters died to protect them and so someone else (Yoda and Cere) has to step in to finish the job. For Ahsoka, her master is STILL ALIVE, he's just now a Sith and is trying to kill her. Nobody steps in to try to finish the job he started with Ahsoka (nor does Ahsoka really ever seem that open to it). This ALSO leaves her in a little bit of limbo in a way nobody else is.

So I'm generally willing to sort-of re-interpret her choosing not to identify as a Jedi within this context to make it less about feeling like she's better than all the other Jedi and more that she feels STUCK in how to get back to that identity in a way nobody else is. Just because she still meditates and tries to help people doesn't make her officially a Jedi when she intentionally left the Order for a reason. She chose to stop being a Jedi for a reason. In the Prequels Era, just being a kind Force sensitive person didn't make you a Jedi, so it works for me that Ahsoka would insist that she ISN'T one for a while, even when she looks a lot like one to an outside perspective. I could even see a more Jedi positive narrative taking the fact that she still acts and thinks like a Jedi in an interesting direction for her.

It's easier to utilize that interpretation in Rebels where Ahsoka is GENERALLY more positive about the Jedi and, despite not really identifying as one herself, she seems fine with getting lumped in as a Jedi along with Kanan and Ezra. She intentionally seeks Kanan and Ezra out for "Jedi stuff" once or twice during season 2. She ONLY brings out the "I'm no Jedi" line when Anakin throws the Jedi (and the fact that she'd left the Order) in her face during their confrontation before he's explicitly revealed to be Anakin (which means Ahsoka can still pretend he's NOT Anakin and be angry that this is the person who KILLED Anakin instead). She seems like she might be on the path towards becoming a Jedi again by following these two people who are slightly further ahead on that path than she is (and then she sees Anakin as Vader and she gets blown right off of that path all over again apparently). Ahsoka isn't the main character of Rebels and the entire narrative is about Ezra and Kanan coming together as teacher and student to become true Jedi by learning compassion and selflessness via sacrifice. Ahsoka can't overshadow or outshine the two main characters by making her seem BETTER than the two characters who are explicitly learning to become Jedi by emulating Prequels Jedi, which is helping her.

It's HARDER to utilize this interpretation within something like, say, the Ahsoka show, where it's absolutely clear that its take on the Jedi is NEGATIVE. Sabine calls herself a Jedi, other people call her a Jedi, but Ahsoka explicitly states that she doesn't want Sabine to be a Jedi AT ALL and never identifies as one herself. She calls the Jedi failures and implies that it's because they were elitist. She and Sabine constantly refuse to abide by Huyang's standard Jedi protocols and seem to see them as useless and old-fashioned. There isn't a SINGLE thing about the Jedi that is represented as positive in this show, which makes it decidedly difficult to pretend that Ahsoka is refusing to identify as a Jedi simply because she's in a particular emotional limbo about it that she needs to work out. Instead, Ahsoka refuses to identify as a Jedi because she associates being a Jedi with being an elitist asshole apparently and might only start reclaiming the title when she decides that she can sort-of... be a new kind of Jedi that's better than the old ones (not unlike what Baylan claims to be doing with Shin). It's DECIDEDLY anti Jedi in tone and I'm generally unwilling to try to rework the entire fucked up narrative of the show to try to pretend that it isn't. The Ahsoka show is an explicitly anti Jedi narrative and that's just... the facts of the matter. It sucks, but it's true. It's not worth me putting in any more work than that.

I haven't read the Ahsoka novel, so I don't know whether its tone is closer to Rebels or the Ahsoka show. If it feels to you closer to how the Ahsoka show landed, my advice would be to just purge it from your canon. That's the nice thing about Star Wars, you can pick and choose what's canon to you and what isn't. If it doesn't work for you, you can straight up pretend it doesn't exist. As far as I'm concerned, the Ahsoka show never happened. It's stupid and doesn't deserve to be considered within my canon. If, however, it feels closer to how Rebels ended up, my advice is to see if you can find some way to re-interpret some of the more Jedi critical pieces or just pretend THOSE parts don't exist and separate it out from the parts you DO enjoy.

#star wars #ek johnston #ahsoka novel #ahsoka tano #jedi #pro jedi #ahsoka critical #ahsoka tano critical #star wars rebels #anti ahsoka show #ahsoka show critical #ahsoka show

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firesnap · 2 years

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CJ got me thinking first thing in the morning about how this ending really was the best way to deal with the c!Crime codependency issue.

Tommy has to learn to let Wilbur go. He can't stay glued to Wilbur's side out of fear of what will happen if he's not there. He can't function constantly scared Wilbur is going to say "I'll be back" again and never return. We saw even in that detective stream with Tubbo he acts lost and worried when Wilbur isn't around. That's not healthy.

Wilbur needs to learn how to live without Tommy as a crutch. Wilbur doesn't have to try with Tommy. He doesn't get better around Tommy because Tommy's loyalty enables him in a lot of ways. We see it constantly with how he just assumes Tommy will follow along with whatever. We see him often ignore Tommy's protests and own needs because he assumes (correctly) Tommy will be there regardless.

We find them interesting because they care, but often gloss over how other characters, and CrimeBoys themselves, reference that they care to the exclusion of other people and concerns. This ending shows Wilbur not offering Tommy the choice to follow because it's not Tommy's story and Tommy finally decides he has to let Wilbur go and not live in fear that Wilbur won't come back. It's a healthy step. It hurts but in the same way setting a bone does. There's something broken about them and it needs to heal.

And to be frank, the open ending for what happens to them is great for fandom and the CC's... once everyone calms down. If you don't plan on watching dsmp vol 2 then this serves as an ending with hope of reunion when the characters are in a healthier place. We can create fics and head canons for future meetings or letters exchanged or wild circumstances that would bring them together. For the cc's and the fans who are going to watch vol 2, this leaves something else for their characters to do and build on.

It feels like a season conclusion. Which it was (and we tend to forget it was reframed as a season finale because...well that's a different post). It left some things on the table in case they want to pick back up on it but wrapped up enough things to give some resolution if they (or the audience) decide to leave it there.

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couldntbedamned · 5 months

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Hello! Since you appear to be a Strange fan, both comics and the movie version, do you think the movie does his arc justice? Not being very famiaair with the comics my issue with the first movie is that pre-character development Stephen is potrayed, instead of charismatic amoral bastard like pre-character development Tony Stark, as merely a run of the mill charmless asshole, so what happens to him feels more cruel than karmic, but you also don't get that invested in seeing him get better.

So, Stephen's backstory in DS1 definitely left something to be desired for me. I know that BC did his absolute best, but not touching on WHY Stephen is so hell-bent on Not Failing Ever and so determined to Be The Very Best Like No One Ever Was™️ was a huge miss on SD & MCU Exec's part.

Stephen's childhood and losing his sister Donna is such a huge part of what informs who he is as a character. He couldn't save his sister from drowning and he's never forgiven himself for that. He has a perfect record in the OR because 1) he IS a talented and gifted surgeon and 2) he's able to purposefully choose cases he KNOWS he can pull off. Every time he saves a patient he's succeeding rather than repeating the worst failure of his life and the thought of not saving a patient terrifies him because he already failed once and he can't bear to to it again.

[Also in 616 Stephen's father was such a massive asshole and Stephen's childhood was Not Great, which also factors in to why he's so driven to succeed. (Also he developed a drinking problem to cope with the pressure.)]

One of the parts that struck me in DS1 is just how uncomfortable he is being thanked by the patient's family after he removes the bullet. Dude saved a guy's life, but he doesn't exactly like the praise from the family; he doesn't think of himself as a hero. He just did his job and he resents the hell out of the other doctor (Dr. West) for not doing his properly (in Stephen's view). Then he's back to being cocky which always struck me as a front.

I will never ever EVER say that Stephen's not arrogant. He IS. I LOVE that about him and I feel like one of the few people in fandom who doesn't have a desire to see him humbled or knocked down a peg or two (usually in the name of making him worthy of whatever love interest is being put forward in fic 🙄). He's arrogant and he has every reason to be: he IS smart, he IS a talented doctor, and he IS a master of the mystic arts. He's earned the right to be.

But that's FAR from the only part of his character. He's also empathetic, incredibly lonely, and desperate for connection even when he's terrible at it. In lots of ways he's a self-fulfilling prophecy because he WANTS to connect with people, he WANTS love but he's also so scared of failing or hurting anyone else that he defaults to Asshole!Stephen because if they leave, then he can't hurt them. He's also, more than once in 616, made decisions for someone's own good without actually consulting that person.

Stephen is, first and foremost, a healer. He WANTS to help people. He ABHORS the taking of a life. And a lot of that clashes once he learns about the mystic art because as we've seen, sometimes there's no other way and it weighs HEAVILY on him, to the point where he feels so guilty about what's happened to Peter in regards to Endgame that he did a spell to MODIFY THE WORLD'S MEMORY. There some desire to play around, sure, but I 100% believe most of it was due to guilt.

I wish his trauma from the Dark Dimension and Infinity War was touched on more, because man has been through the wringer.

The thing about adapting Doctor Strange into a movie is there is a LOT of lore that has to be cut or repurposed to fit within the box MCU has built. SD is a fan and did his best, I know, but things like Stephen's backstory getting cut and removing the scene in Nepal where Stephen tends a dog's paw because "he's not nice enough yet" kind of irk me. I do think, hands down, he has a much better grasp of Stephen as a character than do MW and SR. And BC himself is a huge fan and understands Stephen's character very well and what little backstory/gravitas we got for Stephen in ITMOM (that wasn't built around pining for a woman he parted amicably with and hasn't dated in fucking years 🙄) was because of BC. I wish we'd gotten more.

I'd definitely check out @doctorofmagic and their AMAZING posts. They have such a fabulous understanding of Stephen as a character.

#couldntbedamned answers #stephen strange #doctor strange

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stranger-rants · 1 year

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(Trauma dumping, feel free to ignore this ask if that's not okay with you.)

I am of the opinion that child neglect is an insidious sort of abuse and the people in the ST fandom don't get the nuance of it. (Or the Duffer brothers for that matter. But they don't get the nuance of a lot of things so eh.) They dramatize things and heap more abuse on Steve to make him, I don't know, more pitiable? Like. They do not have to. Speaking from personal experience.

My parents lived with me, but they were workaholics and I only ever saw them at dinner; by then, they had no energy for child-rearing. They left me by myself and treated me as someone they had to feed, clothe and take to school, nothing more. I was pretty much a little ghost haunting a house and acted as such.

Nowadays being perceived leaves me emotionally flayed and most of my relationships fail because I don't have the capacity to deal with real, genuine emotions. People have accused me of being there but not fully there and it's shit. I'm unlearning and learning a lot to make myself available and trying to build up the energy for basic socialization.

My parents never failed to provide me with the things I need to live. My parents never raised a hand against me. My parents did their best. And I grew up thinking I didn't have it that bad until I talked to people online.

Like. Not having it bad doesn't mean having it good. The in-between can be just as damaging. If people want to headcanon Steve as abused (I know I do because projection), they don't have to add so much to it. It's fine just as is. Well, it's terrible as is.

That is a very valid experience. There's a lot my parents did that they didn't intend to be hurtful or harmful, but it was nonetheless. There are various kinds of trauma, big and small. There are very loving homes still filled with generational trauma.

A person doesn't have to be explicitly abused or neglected in order for their experiences to justify their maladaptations. Trauma is complex. It's just silly to expect people living with wildly different circumstances to cope with life the same way.

There are opportunities my parents gave me that made my life better. They didn't neglect me. I have friends who were neglected, and they cope very differently from me. I dealt with violence, infidelity, and alcoholism in my home. It's just different.

The canon pieces to Steve's home life aren't spectacular no matter what privileges he has been given, but they're also not as immediately life threatening as Billy's and his parents do not systemically abuse him in canon.

That doesn't mean he copes well with everything or that his circumstances didn't shape him. I think that the Duffers haven't truly explored that, so we have to assume a lot. However, some assumptions made like yours are pretty realistic and thoughtful.

It's when people make false comparisons that I become completely unhinged. That does such a disservice to Billy, and people who relate to Billy. We too have our trauma dismissed on a regular basis, so it adds insult to injury to do this on top of that.

#asks

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wanderingaldecaldo · 2 years

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Hi! I'm WanderingAldecaldo, aka wash (or W). I'm a longtime writer, new modder and virtual photographer, and very much still taken with Cyberpunk 2077 and Mitch and Val and Rosalind Myers.

About me: mid-40s, bisexual, nonbinary, recently diagnosed audhd, married, cats, the usual nerdy stuff. Besides Cyberpunk 2077, you'll find content about Bioware, RDR2, Our Flag Means Death and Izzy in particular, various sci-fi and movies, random video games and music stuff, plus some politics.

I try to tag things well so if I can tag something for you, let me know and I'll see what I can do. Anons are off but DMs are open and private. I block empty blogs with default icons, I don't necessarily follow back, and I have learned that blocking and filtering are the keys to a good fandom experience on here. I run on a pretty deep queue (usualy 3-4wks) though I do occasionally go on reblogging sprees, especially on Fridays because, ya know, #fem v friday. (Also when I'm bored and goofing off at work. Shh, don't tell my boss.)

My OCs, links, and more after the cut.

Valerie Vermilion

StreetKid!V is my original V, and the first OC I've ever grown really attached to, despite having written thousands of words for several others in Bioware properties. Corpo!Val is from an AU where V is recruited into Arasaka in her teens.

Tags

#valerie vermilion (all) #streetkid!val (note: inconsistent usage, plus old posts not tagged) #corpo!val #val things (various)

oc profiles

Hilary Navarro

Hilary debuted in my StreetKid!V longfic, No One's Gonna Love You, as the family's best netrunner, and she will have a larger part in the sequel. 👀 She's bright, bubbly, and fun, just like her bubblegum hair. #hilary navarro

Travis (aka the Dirtbag)

Travis doesn't have a full name yet, poor thing. He's a sopping wet creature. He's a horrible awful man. He's my babygirl and I love him. #travis needs a tag i guess

Antonio (Tony) Varga

Tony was a childhood friend of Jackie who cut ties when he left the 'Tinos. He regrets never making up with Jackie before his death, but he'll make it up to Lupe. #antonio varga

Gabriella Varga

Older sister to Tony, and childhood crush of Jackie. A friend to all Heywood. She and Tony are still close. #gabriella varga

Apex Predators — Val & Mitch

These two have been consuming my brain since February 2021, about a week after I started the game. They started off with a spark of an idea that became No One's Gonna Love You, and I've still got more to go. I have a ridiculous number of WIPs for them; currently I'm working on the Corpo!Val AU story, and possibly after that I will write the actual "Apex Predators" fic. (I have finally accepted that I'm never gonna get to that fic, and will likely rename the ship because of that fact.)

#ship: apex predators (all) plus corpo version ship profiles

plus #mitch anderson

Business & Pleasure — Richard & Val

Richard belongs to dear friend @/dustymagpie. Corpo!Val isn't one for romance, but she still has needs. Who better to service them than handsome escort Richard Ripper?

#ship: business & pleasure

Panzerboys — Mitch & Scorpion

Mitch's dialogue in "I'll Fly Away" makes it pretty clear they didn't have a sexual relationship, but I'll die on the panzerboy hill. One day I will write their love story. #ship: panzerboys

Hilary + Carol — name tbd

Carol is my favorite (non-Mitch/non-Panam) Nomad. She's funny and smart and tough and a total milf and deserves some love. Carol is a real heartbreaker, love 'em and leave 'em type and never dates within the clan, but Hilary is gonna change that. #carol + hilary tag tbd

AO3

Into My Arms — StreetKid!Val/Mitch series

"Blaze of Glory" — mature; pining; 2696 words

No One's Gonna Love You (aka NOGLY) — explicit; friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, lots of angst (and lots of smut); 59338 words

"Work It" — explicit; PWP; 1798 words

"Cut Your Hair" — mature; fluff, light angst; 3032 words

"This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody)" — explicit; smutty angst? angsty smut? take your pick; 7045 words

"Lover's Spit" — explicit; more smutty angst, my fave! 4058 words

"Triangles" — Mitch/Scorpion/Fem V; explicit; PWP; 4418 words

"Changes" — CBP77 Reverse Bang entry based on art by silkspectre; Johnny/Fem V; explicit; PWP; 5468 words

"Know Your Rights" — for SteelPhoto as part of art trade; Jackie & River; teen & up; 1312 words

"Burning Chrome 2077" — collection of drabbles and ficlets from the Lizzie's 2021 spring prompt event; mature; allllll sorts of stuff, including bad poetry; 7162 words

Writing Tags

all writing: #wash's writing, #wip wednesday, #smutty sunday

meta tags: #about fanfic, #about writing

story-specific: unnamed corpo!val au brainrot, pre NOGLY, NOGLY, post NOGLY

Nexus Profile

Clothing Mods

Edgerunner Jackets — Cleaned & Recolored [fem & masc V]

Loose Fit Pants — Cleaned & Recolored [gender inclusive]

Cut-off Vests — Cleaned, Cropped, Recolored [gender inclusive]

High Heel Shoes — NPC heels with 7 Colors [fem V only]

High Heel Shoes — now ArchiveXL, 28 Styles [fem V only]

Cowboy Boots — Cleaned & Recolored [gender inclusive]

Pride Tees — Cropped & Recolored [gender inclusive]

Masc V Jeans — Refit & Recolored [masc V only]

Photomode Mods

Specialized Photomode Packs [fem V]

"Night Out" Photomode Pack [fem V]

NPC Mods

Mitch's Alternate Outfit(s)

Mitch's 4K Face Re-Texture — default and without scratches

Mitch's Jacket Fix — fixed the broken mesh of Mitch's jacket

Locomotion Mods (Placide to MA, Teddy to corpo, Scorpion to corpo)

pfp from this amazing piece made by my love @/impishbiscuit

header by me

art + VP I have commissioned

twitter (mostly nsft stuff, when I remember to post it)

mods I use

...more as I remember to add it

Credits: I totally ripped off was inspired by my dearest @/fereldanwench for this post. Love you, bb. 😘😘😘

Last update: 16 Nov; update about me, fics

#about me #personal #meta #mods i made #my screens #wash's writing #mitch anderson #valerie vermilion #rosalind myers #working au title: the president's merc #previously pinned post #mitch x val

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timetakeover · 1 year

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[Like do my non-Doctor Who fandom followers understand the depth of the relationship between the Doctor and the Master

They were best friends (and arguably in love already) 2,000 years ago, in their school days, in their first lives (when the Master is now on his 20-something'th life and the Doctor on his 15th.)

They each took wives and had families, the Doctor left their home planet all together, they lost touch as the Doctor learned to be a better person and the Master became worse. They were apart for literal lifetimes and on the Masters 12th life (the Doctor's 3rd,) he followed the Doctor all the way to another planet because he missed him. And thinking there's no way the Doctor would want to be friends with him again now that they'd become such different people, he forces the Doctor to give him attention by hatching evil schemes for the Doctor to defeat. Every once awhile a scheme gets out of hand; they team up, they're briefly on the same side again, and then they go their separate ways.

This goes on for lifetimes. Eventually their home planet was destroyed. The Doctor thought he was the only time lord left in the universe, only to come across the Master again and realize there's actually TWO of them. The only two time lords left in the universe, the Doctor and his highschool sweetheart. But, the master is still evil. There's an understanding that if they become friends again, he'll have to follow the Doctor's rules, he'll have to give up his free will and change his moral code. He chooses to die out of spite instead.

But, then he's brought back. There's another face off with a bigger evil than the Master; they take each other's side again. They win by teaming up. And then the Master leaves, the Doctor dies, and things are the same as before.

Then the Master is back again, as Missy this time, doing another evil scheme to force the Doctor to pay attention to her. The Doctor defeats her, they go their separate ways. Missy is put on trial, sentenced to death. The sentence has to be carried out by someone of her species, another time lord. He can't. He finds a loophole and saves her life. She'll be imprisoned for 1,000 years and he'll watch over her to make sure she doesn't escape.

They bond in this prison vault for nearly 100 years. They canonically watch Frozen together. He starts breaking the rules for her, sneaking her out, going on adventures together. Missy's past self time travels and sabotages the whole thing. They both die. The Doctor is left believing Missy abandoned him, never knowing she actually died for what they mutually believed in, that she died to prevent her past self from doing more evil because she truly wanted to change and be friends again.

They regenerate. The Doctor is furious over Missy's betrayal. The Master is traumatized from the horrific end of his failed redemption arc. He's never going to try to be good again, he decides, because he's simply not capable of it and it only makes things worse. They're on opposite sides again. The Master does a handful of schemes, culminating in one where he BECOMES the Doctor, wears multiple layers of the Doctor's old clothes at once, goes completely out of his mind with his obsession over the Doctor. The Doctor defeats him again and takes her identity back. The Master is dying and the Doctor, still betrayed and hurting, doesn't help him. He kills her, so that they'll die together.

And…. It'll be at least a couple of years before we see the next installment of "couples counseling would have less collateral damage, you guys…"]

#heads rolling for the one i adore;

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starfellwish · 3 years

Text

ML Theory: Episode 22, Finale, Ladynoir, and Everything Else

This will have rocketear and finale synopsis spoilers - be warned.

I genuinely do think that the two part finale of season 4, "The Last Attack of Shadowmoth" (which is,,, a title to say the least; more on that in a bit) is gonna be so tense for a variety of reasons.

Rocketear Analysis

We have a couple of gamechanger episodes coming up. Rocketear definitely was a gamechanger as Adrien was able to realize that Alya and Nino are aware of each other's identities with Ladybug giving them permission. And he's angry about it. He knows that Ladybug lied to him about the rules, and he also knows that her being the guardian is definitely something that has led to their relationship being affected (flashbacks to a previous s4 ep when he's like it's cool if she's the guardian, as long as their partnership isn't affected - well that was some foreshadowing, wasn't it?). Honestly, seeing that as Marinette makes all the rules now as guardian, her decisions should be able to include her knowing Chat's identity. But. Chat Blanc exists, and I think that her not telling him about it and hiding it from him is a parallel to how she wanted Alya to hide the truth from Nino (obviously this failed too - Alya went behind her back to tell Nino the truth). She knows that he'd understand if she told him and its better to tell him that he may destroy everything if they knew each other's identities than left him feeling isolated and alone and at risk for literally getting akumatized. By isolating him, she's quite literally putting the world at risk for Chat Blanc 2.0, rather than her telling him something heartbreaking and being there for him so he doesn't get hurt by Shadow Moth's intentions. I think that she'll come to realize this in the finale and learn from her mistakes.

I think that in this screenshot, we got a snippet of foreshadowing of what's to come:

I saw some people theorize that this is foreshadowing that Adrien's real identity is between Ladynoir, and while this could be general foreshadowing for the entirety of the show (Marinette is in love with Adrien, and that's why she can't love Chat Noir), I do think that interpretation could be misplaced here due to the tone of the episode. Instead, I believe that this is foreshadowing that Chat may reveal himself to Ladybug. After all, she literally knows the identity of literally every other person who has a miraculous, and is the guardian.

*Side note: It also reminds me a lot of Felix. Could be a reference to that? Not sure what my thoughts on that being, but it's just somehting that struck me.

Episode 22

In my mind, it would make most sense for Adrien to reveal himself in episode 22. We've been told by the people who make the show that since episode 22 is the 100th episode of the show overall, it will be incredibly serious. This episode may run the highest risk of Adrien being akumatized into Chat Blanc again, as tensions are definitely running high. However, another akumatization event could happen, and Chat could be left out again, making him angry. I think that him getting akumatized is more likely, however. This is because of his appearance in Sentibubbler - I think that's foreshadowing. After everything is taken care of, Chat Noir and Ladybug will get into an argument. Chat will tell Ladybug that he knows about Alya and Nino, and that he thinks she's a hypocrite. He was loyal to her, and now he's having his doubts about their partnership, because he doesn't even think its a partnership anymore. Ladybug is the guardian and has more secrets that she is keeping from him. She talks about Chat Blanc and tells him that him finding out her identity leads to basically the end of the world. Adrien is surprised that he was akumatized before. He then gets mad at her for literally hiding this from him when they could've taken precautions beforehand, and then could possibly assert that he doesn't know what else she's hiding from him. He also, at the same time, doesn't feel like he should be Chat Noir anymore if he poses that much of a risk to the world. He detransforms in front of her and gives her the miraculous. He tells her he won't be a problem again, and leaves.

Finale

Ladybug, of course, realizes her mistake and tries to get him back. However, over the course of 23 and 24, she is caught up with Alya and Nino's problems with them not hiding their secrets. Adrien is already scheduled to leave Paris for a couple of weeks with Lila, and Ladybug trying to persuade him to stay is basically one of the main conflicts of the final episode. Pair this with "ShadowMoth's Last Attack" and you've got a season finale. I think the name of the season finale, is, as always, a misdirect. There's no way Gabriel is getting all his miraculous taken away until season 5, as that's when the full reveal happens, so it seems like he'll return to just regular old Hawkie. I don't think it would make sense for him to be disarmed now and for next season's finale to have the full reveal. Here's the synopsis below so we can dissect it.

Shadowmoth's Last Attack

Having understood that if Ladybug always triumphs, it's thanks to her prudence, Papillombre (Shadow Moth) conceives a diabolical plan around a super villain endowed with the power to push his victims to take all risks. When Marinette learns that Adrien must leave Paris for several weeks with Lila, new muse of the Agreste brand, she is ready to do she is ready to do anything to stop him. How far will she go? Even to the fatal risk of betraying her secret identity for love? And will Adrien take the risk to finally stand up to his father?

Okay, so let's dissect this. What I said before adds up to Adrien leaving with Lila. It would also explain why Marinette would potentially reveal herself to Adrien, if only to get him to stay. Because she knows that he's Chat, and maybe her being Marinette will somehow influence his decision. Or, it may show him that she's finally willing to trust him with everything.

It could also allude back to the song in the movie. Since the Miraculous movie was originally intended to act as a finale to Season 5, we can take things from early development and see if they end up fitting in the narrative. In this situation I'm going to quote "Ce mur qui nous separe" (English translation: The Wall Between Us), the French song that was made for the movie when it was intended to be the Season 5 finale.

It’s strong when I see him I want to scream on the rooftops our love that reaches out to us But I know that I can’t It’s not the right moment We have to be patient be patient

Here's the French translation in case the translation Genius gave me was wrong:

C’est fort quand je le vois Je veux crier sur tous les toits Notre amour qui nous tend les bras Mais je sais que je ne dois pas Ce n’est pas le moment Il faut être patients Être patients

This part of the song is from Marinette's perspective, and the fact that she's saying that she has to wait for the right moment to actually be in love with him probably means that she knows Adrien's identity. Because why would she "know" that she can't love him? Why is it not the right moment? Why do they have to be patient? Her being Ladybug and being unable to be in a relationship may explain why it's not the right moment, but the fact that she says "our" love points me in another direction. She knows she loves Adrien, and she knows that Chat, and therefore, Adrien, loves her. But she can't tell him her identity yet. However, her knowing his identity would make sense. I remember that before season 4 started airing, a lot of the fandom wondered if Chat was going to have to reveal his identity to her because she's the guardian. After all, that would make sense. Them making it a problem over the course of the season would mean that it would have to be handled in some way. I think that her finding out Chat's identity is probably the most logical course of action, as she can't be a good guardian until she has all the information at her disposal.

There are two specific lines which I find interesting in the finale synopsis. The part where it says, "Papillombre (Shadow Moth) conceives a diabolical plan around a super villain endowed with the power to push his victims to take all risks," is particularly interesting. This could mean a couple of things. Shadow Moth could be akumatizing Felix - after all, he stopped at nothing to try and replace Adrien in order to ruin his relationship with his friends. He kissed Ladybug when she told him no. He was snooping in Adrien's things. Clearly, there was nothing he wasn't willing to do in order to get the ring back. (This whole thing is never explained either after Felix - why is the ring so important?) Maybe that will make a comeback? Or, the "his" in the synopsis where it specifies that the villain has no limits, may be referring to Shadowmoth. In that situation, it could be Lila who is again akumatized. She has clearly no limits, as she's working for Shadow Moth willingly, and likely knows his identity. This is one likely scenario. Or Shadowmoth will akumatize Adrien. He may feel detached, and Gabriel will interpret it as being sad that he's being taken away from all of his friends. Adrien is known for being quite stubborn, and having Ladybug fight Adrien's akumatized state would be season finale material. However, if he is akumatized in the finale as something else, then the Chat Blanc akumatization in episode 22 is unlikely (they wouldn't do something like that twice in a row). Of course, his akumatized state would be different than Chat Blanc because people can be akumatized into multiple different villains and Hawkie doesn't know that Adrien=Chat Noir.

The second line that I find particularly interesting is this one:

And will Adrien take the risk to finally stand up to his father?

Now, why would Adrien stand up to his father? Maybe with literally everyone betraying him, he'll find no reason to stay. He needs a constant in his life, and telling his father that he needs him to be here for him may be a step that he makes. After all, Ladybug and him are having their biggest fight, his best friend Nino told him that he finds his hero persona absolutely abhorrent, and he doesn't feel like he has a place on the superhero team. He needs someone, and he's hoping that Gabriel can be that person.

That could be one scenario, or Adrien may find out about Hawkie's basement. Now, this, could raise a lot of questions for him. While I believe that Adrien would have the normal tendency to be like "father, what the hell." He may honestly believe that this is all he has left, and therefore, will assist his father. This takes me back to the season 2 opening card.

Where is Chat Noir? With the villains.

Maybe Adrien will have his well deserved Dark!Chat Noir arc. Or maybe, he'll be a spy for the Quantic team. Ladybug and him will make up, and he'll tell her that he can spy on Hawkie for the team, and that's how they move into season 5 - with Adrien as a double agent. He will help his father in everything that he does, and therefore, get access to more information that he can share with the team. He can help establish a meeting for Hawk Moth to get caught, with evidence, by planting cameras, calling police, etc.

Honestly, I'm hoping for the latter subplot, as I don't want Chat Noir to go evil for everyone's sakes. I do think that the latter would also give him a cementable role that would logistically make sense and help establish him as an strong character, and more importantly, a valuable member of the team and Ladybug's true partner.

Or, they could go down the more simpler route, and choose Adrien to find out, be shocked, and then yell at his father for being who he is. Gabriel just assumes because Adrien is only just Adrien, he doesn't have to worry about him. He will threaten Adrien, and Adrien will stay silent in front of him, but tell the team on the side. Of course, this doesn't really mean double agent Adrien, but it still implies spy Adrien. It also still manages to make his character more relevant.

Regardless, there's a lot of different ways that line could go, and I'm excited to see where it moves on from there.

Implications on the Love Square

The love square seems entirely messed up this season. There is almost nothing going on in relation to it, especially in regards to Ladynoir, Ladrien, and Marichat. Adrienette has honestly the most action right now, especially with the reverse umbrella scene, them helping out Juleka together, etc. This leads me to think that while we'll get a lot of Ladynoir in the finale as they repair their relationship, Adrienette may be the strongest ship of the four when moving into season 5. Let me explain why.

Over the course of this entire season, Adrien has been getting closer to Marinette, and is honestly more warm with her than he has been with Ladybug. This can explain what everyone has been thinking - a reverse love square. Even if Ladybug and him make up, Chat may honestly want to go and see other people. This includes Mari. What Nino said about Ladybug finding him annoying may actually really affect him and his feelings and make him realize that he can find love elsewhere. It's also the fact that it was enunciated twice during Rocketear that Alya couldn't fall in love with someone that she didn't really know. That could lead Adrien to wonder if he really knows Ladybug, which will definitely complicate his feelings. The Kagami thing was never going to work out, so he just needs to find someone else who cares for him. He knows Marinette; he has called her similar to Ladybug - he may rebound from Ladybug to Marinette. Ladybug may realize that she messed up, and she has already shown that she is becoming more indifferent to dating Adrien, due to what happened with Luka. When she and Chat Noir fix their relationship, she may see him as the only person she doesn't have to lie to, and therefore thinks about pursuing a relationship with him. Therefore, a reverse love square would make the most sense in this situation.

If a ship were to start actually dating in season 5 - it may honestly depend on how the finale is. The two most likely ships imo are either Ladynoir or Adrienette. If Ladynoir makes up during the finale, then the barriers to them dating aren't really present, unless the Alya thing actually makes it complicated for them. Adrienette may get together, but Marinette is wary of dating because she's Ladybug. However, we all know she's weak in the knees for Adrien and will definitely say yes if he asked her out.

Therefore, I feel like this season is leaning more towards plot and character development, and while it may set some things up for season 5, it is important to pay attention at the little shifts in the square, because they are happening right in front of us.

Alya and Marinette

I wanted to be able to talk about this at some point in this theory, but since everything else is more Adrien centric, I added it here at the end. Okay, so we know that Alya is lying to Marinette about telling Nino things. We also know that Alya has bended the rules for Nino multiple times, both before and during Rocketear. This could go one of two ways: Alya telling Nino teaches Marinette that she needs to be able to trust Chat, and therefore helps her realize that she doesn't need to be so secretive and lie all the time. It could also lead to a plot where Alya basically messed up largely by telling Nino, and everything goes downhill from there. Ladybug shows Chat that they can't know each other's identities because of what happened with them. We also Nino is a bit of a blabbermouth - love his character, but he is. He told Adrien not only his identity, but also Alya's. He also told him that they know the other's identity. This is bad, and Adrien knowing definitely affects the plot later on. If Adrien ends up revealing himself to Ladybug, it is likely that she'll find out about Nino saying that, and having to revoke their kwamis. This could lead to a strained relationship with Alya. In fact, it is likely that at this point, Marinette will already have a strained relationship with Alya, as it could be revealed that Alya told Nino about Rena Furtive. This could lead to Ladybug being defensive and worried that she made mistakes, and literally just closing the Miraculous box because of it. Maybe Alya will go rogue? After all, it was mentioned in Rocketear (and I appreciate that they talked about this) how Alya was a reporter and that by extension means that her personality is one of a truthteller. Alya getting angry at Mari could definitely lead to a situation where she threatens to tell he everyone. I don't think Alya would or could do that, but anger leads to akumatization, and an akumatized Alya would not be good for anyone as her judgement would be impaired. Regardless, Rena Furtive may be a short time hero, and Mari and Alya may end the season in a fight. I don't see that being resolved in the finale, as no fight like that is mentioned in those episodes. There is also simply too much going on in the finale for it to make sense. It may be resolved later on, just like how other problems in season 3 started being solved in the beginning of season 4. Or, it could be fought out and resolved in episodes 23 and 24.

Therefore, I think that the Nino carelessly revealing his identity and Alya carelessly disregarding Ladybug's orders may lead to a plotpoint at some point where Alya and Ladybug fight. While I do think that it would be nice if Alya proved Ladybug wrong and showed that they were stronger for working together, I do not think it's likely. The show was deliberate in showing that Alya had a weakness for Nino, and has shown before that it has led to many situations where there were risks for everyone involved. Even Hawkmoth said that love and secrets don't go well together (is he talking from experience?), and I feel like that was so deliberate, but it could also be alluding to Chat and Ladybug. (Side note: it was so weird for Hawk Moth to say that, as he had no idea of the situation; regardless I do think this it's heavy foreshadowing.) Therefore, I do not think the situation that Alya has placed herself in is a situation which will have a peaceful ending.

Final Notes:

I personally cannot wait for the "Gabriel Agreste" episode. I think that the fact that we did not get it yet means that it has serious story implications. Personally, I believe it's going to explain allllll the backstory we need for the whole Bourgeois/Tsurugi/Agreste history and tell us why Emilie is the way she is right now. Of course, maybe it won't do everything, but the fact that it is named after Gabriel makes me wonder if it'll be his origins episode of sorts.

EDIT AFTER MEGA LEECH: IF GABRIEL AGRESTE REVEALS ADRIEN TO BE A SENTIMONSTER I WILL BE SO SO EXCITED BC ANGST BUT ALSO LIKE??? WHAT ABOUT THE PLOT? WHAT ABOUT THE NINE YEAR OLDS?

Chat snapping is honestly something that I cannot wait for. All of his anger has been building up over the entire season thus far, and the implications of his feelings are definitely serious for the show's plot.

I wonder if Mayura will be making a comeback at some point. While this is less relevant, Nathalie's health seems to be making her bedridden for a long time. Maybe she'll return to a similar state to Emilie? I saw theories that stated that if Hawkie gets his wish, Nathalie's life may be sacrificed for Emilie's, and idk, I think it's not likely that it'll happen, but it would be cool if it did. The ultimate payback for his actions being the loss of Nathalie.

Look at the end card of Rocketear:

He's looking at the moon, which was shown in New York to be something he does when he's sad. Also possible reference to him destroying the moon in Chat Blanc.

Kitty do be on a roof all alone without his lady :(

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greensaplinggrace · 3 years

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honestly THANK YOU for saying all that abt baghra bc i thought i was going crazy from not liking her??? bc i haven't read the books and only summaries of them on wiki and like. i dunno why ppl like her actually even in the show bc this guy, her son, is like "i wanna make the world better for us grisha" and she's just like "no." even tho he sees that she's MAKING HERSELF SICK from suppressing her powers! she's literally like in bed coughing in the flashback yet seem much healthier at the little palace. also like after everything, after her disapproval, after the fold, after centuries of waiting for the sun summoner.. he never abandons her. he makes sure she's cares for. he doesn't harm her. and i have to wonder if baghra has ever thanks him for that, for just not leaving her alone. like i dunno how im suppose ro believe aleks is a heartless villain when he still cares for his abusive mom like this. like has baghra even told her she loved him (honestly she reminds me of a classic emotionally unavailable asian parent but maybe that's just me). also im wondering if baghra ever told aleks that he had an aunt.. bc like.. now that u bring up her isolating him it's like hmmmm...

not at me being like alina... why do u trust the bitter old woman who literally beats u with a stick and verbally abuses u every chance she gets.. just bc she showed a bad painting... like.. pls use two braincells to see that who u figured out as his mother... is also using his protection..

like baghra could've upped and left with alina. but no. she stayed bc she knew she was safe under aleks's protection.

alsoim just impressed that after his first friend tried to drown him and harvest his bones... he didn't go into hiding???? he still wanted to make a safe heaven for grisha!!! HE STILL WANTED TO PROTECT GRISHA EVEN AFTER HIS GRISHA FRIEND TRIED TO KILL HIM FOR HIS FUCKEN BONES. like... this is the guy im suppose to believe is the villain???

honestly i feel like part of the reason why LB's plotlines seem so bad and disconnected (and sometimes outright racist but that's another rant) and why darkles is disproportionately more violent and villainous in the later books is bc she didn't expect the darkling to be so popular and wanted to stick with her guns of making him the villain. but also wanted the money from aleks's popularity. but like you can't have ur cake and eat it too.

Well thank you for sending this ask! It's very sweet and very passionate. I'm glad you liked my post! I didn't put as much thought into it as some of my others lol. I kind of just talked. But it was nice to be able to finally talk about some of the problems I have with both her character and the fandom/author's perception of her.

HERE is the post this is referring to, in case anyone's wondering.

👀👀 You've hit the nail on the head for so many things, here!

Baghra is extremely emotionally unavailable, basically to the point of neglect. She's also verbally and physically abusive, traits which I doubt were only reserved for her students and not her son. Baghra claims she would do anything to protect him, but I've known a lot of parents who have that mindset and yet still harm their children because they think it's "good for them".

Aleksander stays at Baghra's side for years, and even when they're opposing each other she's never too far away from him. Idk if you've read the books but he does eventually hurt her. And as much as I don't like Baghra, I think his actions were horrid. But I'm also honestly kind of surprised it took him so long lmao.

Yeah I mean, in terms of isolation, let's not forget that she never wanted to introduce him to his father, either. Baghra's sense of eternity clouds a lot of her judgments on relationships, which means she views most people as dust and therefore teaches her son to as well. The problem with that is that he's a growing child, and he needs those social and emotional attachments for healthy development.

I would bet quite a bit of money that Baghra has either never told him she loves him or she has told him so few times it's practically forgettable.

And everything becomes more complicated because so many of Baghra's actions are understandable because of her life and her history, but the impacts they have on the people around her, especially Aleksander, are permanently damaging. And the fact that that's never gone over in critical depth in the books or how it's glossed over in fandom is just very disconcerting. Like, acknowledging Baghra's failings doesn't mean we're excusing Aleksander's actions, it just means we're holding Baghra liable for her own. Which the fandom should be doing, considering she's the epitome of an abusive parental figure.

And Alina trusting Baghra over Aleksander is even more confusing! Especially in the show!! This is the woman who beat her and abused her and tortured her friends when they tiny little children (and who probably still does so now that they're adults). This is the woman who mocks you and harasses you and insults you on a regular basis. Why does Baghra revealing she's Aleksander's mother make Alina change her mind?! Like fuck, I'd just feel bad for Aleksander. No wonder he kept it a secret, I would too! And that painting is enough evidence?! Really?! A random painting shown to you by this abusive mentor that's been making your life hell. That's what you're going to betray your new lover over?

The friends trying to harvest his bones thing is a good point, too. I think Aleksander, especially show Aleksander, is incredibly idealistic. I think he cares too much for others - those he's deemed worth his care (a sentiment given to him by Baghra). Despite everything she's tried to teach him about hiding and abandoning others and never caring and never doing anything to help or reach out or connect with people, Aleksander still continues to do so. It's likely because he never got it from Baghra growing up, and so is desperate for those emotional needs to be fulfilled elsewhere.

His turning point, when Baghra tells him it was understandable that those kids tried to kill him because the world is such a hard place for them - that's crucial. And the reason it's possible as a motivating factor is because of that idealism and that desire to help and that desire to be everything his mother isn't. Baghra tells him this trauma he just experienced was because of the oppression of his people, and instead of following her lead and accepting that, going into hiding and abandoning everybody to their misery, he goes I can do something about that. I can make it so this never happens again. Which is usually how trauma like that combines with one's core personality traits at a young age, especially when there's none of the essential support systems in place to aid in recovery (ie, the role Baghra should have been filling but wasn't, because she decided to exacerbate the problem instead).

And yeah, one of my biggest problems with the ham-fisted "beating you over the head with a sledgehammer of evil deeds" look-how-bad-this-character-is! portrayal of the Darkling in the later books comes from the impression I get that Bardugo doesn't trust her readers. She's so desperate to have us hate this character and think him an irredeemable villain, not trusting any of her readers to engage critically with a morally gray character, that it feels quite a bit like condescending fucking bullshit. Which ew, I know how to engage with literature, thanks.

She really does seem to look down on a large part of her fandom, and imo, the infantilization of the female characters in her books seems to carry over to her impression of most of her female readers as well. Which is why the Darkling's character arc gets fucking destroyed. But he's still a good cash grab, of course, so she'll shake his dead corpse in front of the fandom for money every time she wants something from it.

Also! Another reason I think her plotlines feel disconnected (I'm sorry Bardugo I respect you as a person, but shit-) is because the writing in SaB is just bad. I mean, nevermind the absolutely nauseating implications of the way she portrays the Grisha as a persecuted group who's situation is never actually fully addressed as it should be, considering Grisha rights is what her main villain is fighting for (imo for a series called the Grishaverse, LB seems to be pretty anti Grisha), but her characters and story alone are just wrong for each other. They don't fit together.

And the ending is one of the main pieces of evidence in that regard! You can’t say the ending where Alina isn’t Grisha anymore is her “going back to where she started” when she’s always been Grisha. She just didn’t know she was Grisha because she denied that part of herself that she was born with.

Alina is reluctant to move forward or change, she struggles with adapting, and she’s very set on the things she’s grown attached to throughout her life. She also has some latent prejudices against the Grisha, and so denies the possibility of being Grisha for those reasons as well.

Alina’s lack of powers in the beginning of her life because she willfully doesn’t learn about them to avoid change versus her lack of powers at the end of the book when she’s accepted them and then they’re stripped away from her by outer forces are two entirely separate circumstances. You can’t make a parallel about lost powers and lack of Grisha status bringing her back to the start when she was always Grisha and she always had powers and she simply refused to come to terms with it because of personal reasons.

The first situation is an internal conflict that indicates a story about growth and a journey of self acceptance. Denying herself the opportunity to learn about her heritage and to find acceptance with a group of people like her because she’s tied to the past and because of the way she was raised is the setup for a narrative that tackles unlearning prejudice and learning how to connect with a part of her identity that was denied her and learning how to grow independent and self assured. It’s the setup for a different story entirely. The second situation is an external conflict that centers around the ‘corrupting influence of power’... for some reason.

In a world where Grisha do not have social, political, or economic power and they are hunted, centering your heroine’s journey of self acceptance and growth around an external conflict about... the corrupting influence of power (in a group of people that don’t actually have any power?!) just doesn’t work. It is literally impossible to connect the two stories Bardugo is trying to push in Shadow and Bone without seriously damaging the main character’s developmental arc.

The only way a narrative like this would work, claiming that she has gone back to where she started, is either a) if the Grisha weren’t actually a persecuted group and instead were apart of the upper class, or b) if the one bad connection between the two instances is acknowledged - that Alina denied a part of herself crucial to self acceptance and growing up, and that losing her powers at the end has also denied her. It is a tragedy, not a happy ending.

Alina suffered because she didn’t use her powers. She grew sick. It was bad for her. This was not a resistance to 'the corruption of power and the burden of greed', it was her suffering because she couldn’t fully accept herself.

Framing the ending as a return to the beginning can’t be done if you don’t address how bad the beginning was for your main character. You brought her back to a bad point in her life. You regressed her. This should be a low point in her arc. It should be a problem that’s solved so she can finish developing organically or it should be something that is acknowledged as a tragedy in it’s own right, for the future the world (the writing) denied her.

This is a ramble and it makes no sense and I’m really sorry, but my point is that Bardugo put the wrong characters in the wrong story. The character arc required for organic development doesn’t match the story and intended message at all. The narrative doesn’t fit the cast. She's got two clashing stories attempting to work in tandem and she ends up with both conflicting messages that fans still can’t comprehend in her writing and an ending that doesn’t suit her main character to such an impossible degree that it’s almost laughable.

So yeah, there's a few reasons why I think the story and the plot feels so bad and disconnected. I hope you don't mind me making this answer so long! 😅 I was not expecting to write this much.

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this-is-an-open-letter · 3 years

Text

Genuine question for the Chicago PD / Upstead Fandom

under cut for under the cut reasons

I have a genuine question for this fandom that I hope yield's an actual answer or at least clarity as I am very confused and frankly disgusted by a lot of narratives I see surrounding Sophia's time and then exit of PD.

I'll preface this right off the bat so this conversation doesn't turn into something its not, something I am using as part of my confusion for the whole narrative. I am a Sophia Bush fan I have been since her OTH days and I never stopped. I don't know why I never watched Chicago PD before she left, I guess it wasn't really on my radar despite a close friend having watching it from the beginning. By the time I watched it she had already left, the pandemic happened and well it was something 'new' to watch.

I am also a Tracy fan - that's without a question I think my tags on gifsets say as much, check the Chicago PD tag on my blog and its also pretty clear. So this post isn't about that.

What it is about is the amount of people I see via twitter who actively dismiss what Sophia went through on the show. That she struggled with the grueling schedule and weather that the producers know were rough conditions but still insisted on putting that cast in-20 degree weather on the regular. That she was physically and verbally assaulted by Jason in front of the entire cast and crew and nothing was done. These are all facts, these are all well documented facts in print and in recording. In one of the first articles released by Variety it details Jason's behaviour;

NBC launched the investigation after learning last year that there were multiple complaints about Beghe’s behavior on set, with cast and crew complaining about anger issues, volatile behavior, and offensive comments.

The issue was brought to NBCUniversal human resources, a formal complaint was filed, and an investigation were launched. As a result of that, Beghe faced consequences that included written reprimands in his file. He was assigned a coach to help him deal with his anger management issues, and is still in treatment.

Within that same article Jason also made a public acknowledgement and apology for his behaviour;

“I am deeply sorry for my behavior, which I know has been hurtful to my friends and colleagues,” said Beghe. “I have struggled with anger issues for some time, and over the past year, I have been working with a coach to help me learn how to mitigate my temper. It’s an ongoing process, and it has been a humbling one. It is a source of great pride for me to be part of Chicago P.D.’s incredible cast and crew. I have personally apologized to anyone who I have upset, and I am committed to doing what is necessary to make up any damage that I may have caused.

However the consistent narrative, and I'll take a hit and acknowledge the narrative seems to come from certain women in the fandom who have a troubled past with the fandom in general, is that Sophia made it all up and that Jason did nothing to her.

It should also be acknowledged that there were other female cast and crew whole left the show because of Jason's behaviour, it wasn't just directed at Sophia.

Out of respect for the show I will acknowledge that Jason's behaviour has clearly changed as there haven't been any other complaints. But will also acknowledge that when Sophia was leaving the show one of her conditions that would make her stay would be for the Producers to make changes that put the actors safety first, they were unwilling to do that at the time but clearly have done so now, which is unfortunate.

What I've come to learn about this fandom is that its incredibly young - majority of people on twitter/tumblr are women in their early to mid twenties. That isn't to say your age makes you incapable of understanding the damage your narrative carries, in fact my argument is that you're the new generation who understands the importance of mental health, gender identity, and consent better than anyone. We're in a post #MeToo movement where if there is any generation to 'get it' its yours. But what I see constantly is complete and total gaslighting for Sophia's experience, of her truth. And I cannot for the life of me understand how you can read or listen to her experience and dismiss it and instead side with Jason?

So much of the arguments that are had in this fandom via twitter are people hating on Tracy (which blows my mind because she's so fucking excellent on this show), and often times I read the most contradictive tweets about being the type of fan who doesn't have to tear down other characters/actors or ships to boost their own....but then the next set of tweets are ripping Sophia apart and continuing to claim her story isn't true. It frustrates me that women still don't understand what misogyny is and how easily women fall into it as way of defending someone else. If you need to tear down women to boost another woman, that's misogyny. And here's the acknowledgement that people are misogynistic and I completely understand that, but don't tweet out all the ways you find other fans toxic when so many in this fandom do the exact same thing to Sophia. Not understanding contradictions, I get. But not understanding misogyny and gaslighting - that's just lazy and reckless.

The other part of this is this fandoms OBSESSION with ship wars between Linstead and Upstead which I do not understand. I don't understand why anyone wastes their time with a ship that no longer exists and I don't understand why anyone argues something that happened in the past but has no part in the future.

I was a linstead shipper when I started watching the show but by season 6 its clear that Upstead are where its at. And that's all natural progression, the one thing the writers did right. So much of the vitriol spewed is because of this asinine shipper feud that literally has no legs to stand on. And for this fight to cause such a reaction is once again puzzling to me. There has never been another acknowledgement of Erin in the series since she left so the argument is equally dumb and really this fandom is fighting itself for literally no reason.

This was long winded but I see stupid shit on twitter in the Upstead tag sometimes and I truly don't get the argument. Hate Sophia, I don't care but don't dismiss what she went through because it isn't fake and its fucked up to think it is.

Truly, tell me why it is this way because its frustrating.

#chicago PD #upstead #sophia bush #make it make sense to me guys bc from where I stand it doesnt and I understand why but this fandom doesnt...#and that's super troubling to me

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simpingforthisonedeer · 3 years

Text

"Our Sunset"

Julius Novachrono x GN!Reader

1257 words

Notes: I was thinking of this fic in another fandom where one of the characters makes drinks in her bar that are not your average everyday drinks. They are drinks that taste like concepts, like feelings or memories and I just thought of using Julius’s bartending skills to make magic in a glass and make one for the reader and it got real angsty but enjoy😎💕

Julius passed his new experimental drinks around with a grin as his squad let out a raucous cheer. You leaned on the wall, further away from the rest, keeping an eye out for trouble. As the vice captain of the best yet the rowdiest squad amongst the magic knights, you needed to make sure nobody went too far during these squad parties.

Sometimes you needed to keep even the captain in line...Ah, who were you kidding? You needed to keep the captain in line all the time.

You took a deep breath and sighed.

It was a very exhausting job but it was very rewarding. To protect the kingdom, to keep the peace, to bring a smile on people's faces, relieved that they will be alright...there is no job better than this.

Your gaze landed on Julius with an affectionate smile.

And no one did it better than Captain Julius Novachrono, Wizard King to-be.

You were looking down, lost in your own thoughts about the future when Julius teleported next to your side. You tensed slightly at the sudden movement before relaxing. He handed you a drink as he wore a mischievous grin.

"Did I get you?"

"No," you deadpanned. He had always tried to jump you or catch you off guard since you two were younger but you stubbornly learned how to sense his speed and presence just so you could win this little game between you two. It was the sole reason why you could even challenge Julius.

"Aw, I'll get you next time," he said, like always. You two laughed good-naturedly as you clinked your glasses together and you took a moment to observe the drink as he took a sip from his own.

You stared, entranced by the cool colors bleeding into the warm ones as silver flecks blinked in and out of existence.

"I call it, 'Our Sunset.'" Your eyes met his as a proud smile crept up his face at your impressed look.

Julius often made drinks that were conventionally made from alchohol and they would taste amazing. But sometimes, just sometimes, he would make these mysterious drinks that tasted vividly like ideas, emotions, and memories. They were undescribable drinks that could only be described by the concepts they exemplify.

"'Our...Sunset?'" You asked out loud, wondering what it would make you relive.

Julius nodded and pointed at the window next to you as he looped his arm through your's and lead you closer.

"It's something we all see and experience which is where the 'Our' comes from and because it looks like a sunset." He explained as he raised his glass high out the window as he squinted at it through one eye. You assumed it was to align the colors of the drink with the sky. "And...I hope it tastes like a sunset too..."

He watched carefully as you brought the rim of the glass up to your lips, secretly waiting for your approval.

You took a big gulp, intent on feeling all that the drink had to offer, and boy did you feel it.

You felt a breeze that wasn't there as warmth blanketed you like a lingering hug before it vanished, leaving you a little cold. It felt like the end of something good in your life. Like the loss of something you weren't ready to let go.

The first thing that came to your mind was Julius. Tears welled up unwillingly and you let them run their course with a defeated smile. He only had his eyes on the top. He will leave you with the burden of captainship and...leave you. Your mind couldn't go past that. He will leave you and that was the end of it. The end of your warmth.

"Hey, why are you crying?" Julius cradled your face in his hands as his thumb brushed your tears away.

You hated it. You hated it when he loved you, when he cared for you, because one day, you will wake up and you won't be there to feel his presence, his love, his warmth.

"Was it that bad?" He joked. Everyone in the room had already left a while ago when they noticed that their captain and vice captain were sharing a moment. Your squad hoped that with enough private moments, you two would stop hurting yourselves and confess already.

You and Julius have been close friends since you were children and your relationship blurred all lines of convention. Some percieved you two as friends, some as lovers, and sometimes, despite your private discomfort, as siblings.

Nobody knew where it began or ended and if you and Julius were being honest, neither did you two.

"No, it was good," you answered at last. "It was perfect."

"So, what did it taste like?" He let his hands fall.

"It tasted like the end..." You focused your eyes on the setting sun. "And I hate it."

"Well, doesn't it taste like more?" Julius implored as he took your hands in his, making you look up at him in confusion.

"More?"

"Don't you feel the warmth in the aftertaste?"

The warmth...yes, you were warm but that was because Julius was here, not because of—Oh.

This was induced by the drink, not the natural warmth that Julius brings you.

"What end did you think of when you drank it?"

You stared at him for a moment, contemplative, before you realized it was useless hiding from your oldest friend.

"You."

"Me?"

"You, gone." Tears blurred your vision. "That was the end."

"What do you mean? I will always be there." He pulled you into a tight hug with an exasperated sigh. "It's pretty tough to kill me, you know?"

You silently shook in his grasp.

"I mean, when you go away to become Wizard King."

Julius pulled back to look at you. He knew you weren't afraid to stand in his shadow. In fact, you argued with those that compared you two, "What shadow? I am standing in his light and that is enough."

"Don't leave me," you choked out.

Julius was distraught. He had to leave you. He squeezed his eyes shut and sighed. Maybe there’s a way.

"Do you want to be Captain?"

"I don't care for the position. I just want to help you realize your hopes and dreams for this godforsaken kingdom."

"Our hopes and dreams."

“Yes,” You conceded with a weary smile and wiped your tears with a sniffle. “Ours.”

He smiled nervously as he scratched the side of his head in a cute gesture.

“Then,” he looked away. “Would you like to come work with me as an advisor?”

You stared, wide-eyed. You’ve wanted the position but Julius had never offered it to you and now? You didn’t want his pity.

“Isn’t Marx going to be one?”

He pulled you close by your waist with an intimacy only life-long friends share.

“Yes, but he will need some help. I had never asked you because I thought perhaps you should be recognized for your efforts once you become captain but if you don’t particularly care for it...” He lowered his head with uncharacteristic shyness. “I want you to stay by my side...And never leave...”

You couldn’t even properly comprehend the relief that flooded you. It was nearly euphoric. Yes, an end was coming, but so was a new dawn, a new day, a new chapter in your life with Julius by your side.

You pressed your forehead against his with a content smile.

“I would like that.”

Notes: AAAAAAAAAAAAA I was going to write soooooooooooooooo much more but I had to stop myself. But I ofc couldn’t stop myself from soft julius at the end alksdjlsa. I swear I’m doing fine but a nice idea about magic kinda devolved into angst i apologize 😅🙏

#julius novachrono #black clover #julius novachrono x reader #julius x reader

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fonulyn · 3 years

Note

So my partner is amazing and let's me ramble about RE to them whenever I want to, and even sat down to watch Vendetta with me when I bought it, so the other day I was like explaining Leon and Chris' characters (bc my partner knows how much I love them both lmao so of course that's what I was talking about), and we have both come to the conclusion that Leon is a bisexual disaster, and Chris is a homosexual. The running joke is that Leon is also just generally a whore, out there living his best life, and Chris is the kind of gay guy who no one expects to be gay bc of stereotypes and his habit of never really talking about himself, but he also was never really in the closet about it, so he's surprised whenever people are surprised to learn that he's gay lolol but in all seriousness Leon is not only bisexual, but he's the type to fall in love easily despite all of his background and trauma related to betrayal, so his heart is almost continually broken, either bc he's betrayed or he loses whoever it is he's found himself in love with (and sometimes both i.e. Krauser, and Ada at the end of RE2), either through death or just leaving bc he knows he can't stay/can't be with whomever. As for Chris, maybe I'm reading into it wrong, but despite all of the like, romantic connotations they try to put into some of his games (which I don't. Really see? Like there was some in the first game with Jill but I just cannot see them together like that, neither seem interested in one another like that. And of course, Jessica, who I can't stand, and who Chris is supposedly totally oblivious to? Like she thinks he didn't notice her flirting in RE revelations, and Parker is like "is it that, or is he maybe interested in someone else?" And the assumption there is that he means Jill, but again, I don't see it? Even in that game! But that line of Parker's always makes me think "yeah, he's more than just interested in someone else, he's playing for a whole nother team entirely!" lmao. And I haven't seen much for 5 but I'm sure it's there between Chris and Sheva, and then for 6 from what I understand there really is hardly any talk of Chris in regards to any women at all? 8 has nothing, as well, and the DLC for 7 is just another "Chris loses his entire team in horrific fashion yet again" side plot, so nothing there either), he never seems interested. He's always focused on the task at hand, not letting emotions get in his way, and like, some could argue that that's why he doesn't show interest or why Capcom doesn't create more romantic lore around him, but if they really wanted to Make Sure he was straight and Make Sure everyone playing these games knew that, I imagine there would be some one line little hints in the games of him talking about how he can't let himself get distracted, or in his line of work there are no happy endings or what have you, but. There's none of that. Bc he isn't forcing himself not to be interested, he isn't purposefully focusing on saving the day so he doesn't have to get hurt knowing he can never have whichever high potential for a dope ass protag female character who's constantly sacrificing herself to save him bc what better purpose could they serve, right Capcom?, he's just. There, doing his job and trying to save whoever he can, not getting distracted in anyway whatsoever by any of the women in his life, romantically at least. He still cares way too much, but it never comes off as romantic to me in pretty much any way. Also the note he leaves in his STARS locker in RE2remake, Claire being like "this doesn't sound like Chris at all!" Is funny to me bc like, I don't really remember so correct me if I'm wrong, but she doesn't elaborate on WHY that note doesn't sound like Chris lmao is it bc he's respectful to women at all times and doesn't ever objectify them, probably hates when other people do? Or is it bc he would never be interested in women in this way ANYWAYS, the man is so gay, he must have left this note so that Claire would know something is Up, bc her brother is Such a homosexual.

Anyways sorry, I just wanted to ramble/get your opinion on this. Over-analysing RE is actually really fun lmao

haha not gonna lie, I opened your ask in the car on the grocery store parking lot and tried to read it on my phone, and gave up squinting at the small screen halfway through :'D now that I'm back at my laptop though, lol, all good :'D

first of all I'm happy you have someone to ramble to even though they aren't into the thing themselves! :D I regularly rant about RE fandom things to my brother haha and he listens patiently although he isn't in the fandom at all, he's only played the games and that's it. but he still listens to my shippy rambles lol.

as for your thoughts? makes sense to me tbh. I definitely headcanon Leon as a bisexual disaster most of the time, because it does seem fitting. maybe it's partly because I think he's absolutely breathtakingly stunning and it'd be a shame to deny anyone that, so, naturally he wouldn't care about such trivial things as gender, pfth, love is love.

also Leon falling in love easily? absolutely. too damn easily. c'mon this is a man who gets attached to anyone who shows him even the tiniest amount of basic kindness in the matter of minutes. he canonically forms attachments with Claire, Ada, Krauser, Helena, Buddy and JD (JD 😭)... whoever else am I forgetting? but this is the guy who meets someone and would die for them five seconds later. so. it tracks.

and you know what, I can 100% see Chris being only into men. because like. I don't see the romance there either when he's interacting with the women in his life? okay, sure, I could imagine something there between him and Jill if pressed seeing the way he so single-mindedly wants to save her and then holds her in the scene after they get that thing off her chest. maybe. but even there it doesn't really feel super romantic to me, personally.

in the first game with Jill there's not... a lot of romance I don't think? sure she falls asleep against his shoulder in the evac helicopter but i mean, i've fallen asleep against a friend like that? not an indication of romance? they're clearly important to each other! i am not trying to diminish their importance to one another at all! they'd die for each other and they'd do anything it takes to protect each other and i do think their relationship is compelling but... i don't really see anything inherently romantic in it.

and Jessica, yeah, Chris is 100% oblivious to her advances. it is implied in the game that he's into Jill instead but other than that there's again zero actual romantic interaction between Chris and Jill. I was actually talking about this with my brother, who said the same, like there were so many chances in Revelations to put something romantic in there between Chris and Jill but there just. isn't? anything? except for Parker's comment. which is why it felt so damn out of place? (and like my brother would've wanted to ship Chris and Jill, he was kinda bummed about this i feel :'D) so interpreting it to mean he's not interested in women at all would actually make more sense lmao.

as for RE5, I've played it twice (with my brother lmao do we see a theme here) and honestly I don't remember anything in the game that would've insinuated anything more than solid partnership between Chris and Sheva?? if someone who's more familiar with the game wants to correct me on this, then please! but at least off the bat I can not remember anything so I think they actually didn't try to even hint at romance for them?

and in RE6 Chris is way too focused on killing "Ada" to have any thoughts about anything else :'D so no. no mentions in there regarding him and any women. at all. not even hints of Jill which is so incredibly weird (and stupid tbh) bc she was made to be so important to him in RE5 and then doesn't even get a mention in RE6? (/shakes fist damn you capcom! the characters exist outside the games they're in!)

I think that's pretty much the main difference between Chris and Leon tbh. Chris sees the job at hand, and he knows it'll help, he knows it'll save people and it'll make the world safer and he's so single-mindedly focused on the job that he sees nothing else. while Leon sees people, for the better or for worse, and he is willing to take detours if it helps even one person in the meantime. like in RE6, Leon willingly ignores the task at hand to go help just about anyone. Chris doesn't want to pause even when pressed bc he has an end goal in mind.

and bear in mind, I am not trying to say this somehow makes Leon better or Chris better or anything. they're both doing this to help. they both have their heart in the right place. they both care. but they're just so different! their personalities, and their way of dealing with things is different! I feel Chris is really target oriented and wants to get the job done. while Leon's easily distracted from it, because of all the damn feelings :'D

but yeah. i love them both, and i think it's really damn fascinating how they're both the good guys, the heroes of the franchise, but they both take to things so differently.

i don't know if any of this makes sense, I think i rambled too :'D but hey-o, it was fun lmao.

and hey no need to apologize at all!! always feel free to shoot me a message if you wanna chat!

#re answers #anonymous #ask and i shall answer #chris redfield #leon s kennedy #also i know #this is all headcanoning and my subjective opinion #so feel free to disagree #on anything :3 #and everything lmao :'D #long post

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ganymedesclock · 4 years

Note

Why do you think Ghost willing to kill the Maggots and the Menderbug? It really doesn't align with how I see them and it kind of bothers me.

When Ghost encounters the Hunter, he asks if they are like him, and feel the urge “to kill, to stalk, to understand.” Similarly, Nailmaster Sheo, when he teaches Ghost his technique, comments that swordsmanship and art are not so different. “We cut into the world to peer deeper inside.”

Ghost can attack harmless maskflies and aluba, the maggots, and the menderbug. The menderbug is not required for the completion of the hunter’s journal, but the others are, so the game expects you to try killing most things around you at least once.

Both the maggots and menderbug also call you to think about your actions. I think, anon, the reason why these actions bother you is it’s clear the game both expects you to do it, and expects you to have an unclear conscience afterwards. We kill the maggots before accessing the Failed Champion, who is failed precisely because Ghost killed his brethren.

But as there’s no one else who names him ‘Failed Champion’ this more sympathetic shift from the accusatory ‘False Knight’ suggests that Ghost, when they realize what they’ve done, has changed their opinion. After all, they understand what it means to feel the strongest, but also, left alone, of your siblings- the one who has to carry forwards for the others. This literally haunts them in the Abyss to the tune of two masks of damage.

So, why, you say, do they kill the maggots in the first place? Why does canon imply this is the choice they take, as it’s the one tied to an achievement (the Hunter’s Mark) while sparing the maggots is not?

Ghost is curious. That is perhaps a delicate way to put it- Ghost is driven to understand. It is several times implied that there is a thread of anger that runs through Ghost- that they grapple with rage and a desire to prove themselves. To the Mantis Lords, to the Hunter, to the Colosseum. If they are challenged by someone in a way they deem serious they tend to answer that challenge, brandishing the nail, the one thing that is ‘truly theirs’ at the beginning of the game and the thing they refuse to discard or separate from at any moment, even when it is broken and better weapons are available.

And this is my read- why should they not, as an individual who faced formative trauma at a very young age? As someone who felt their survival was senseless- their sibling being taken, other siblings perishing all around them- why did they survive? They have no good answer. They were explicitly not chosen. Discarded.

I think that Ghost is someone who is in fact prone to tearing at the world, sometimes calmly, but other times with intense aggression- WHY AM I HERE? Why is anything what it is? They need answers! They need others to heed their presence! It’s tempered by the fact that they are an experienced explorer, they are used to being alone. They are not quite like Zote, who is needy in such a way that leaks into every single interaction- when Ghost is so illegible, and so self-determined, they can kind of ignore most people who don’t meaningfully stop them, or choose to listen in the hopes of answers.

The other thing is that it takes time and patience and effort to understand and process not wanting to hurt others. This isn’t a problem a lot of people run into because in general, the period while we’re learning how to not hurt other people, is also a period where we are kind of impotent. As someone whose day job is working with kids, I’ll say this: babies rip each other’s hair out and pinch and claw at each other. They are horrifyingly cruel to each other purely because they don’t understand.

There is no inherent understanding of kindness and gentleness. There are few situations you can be effectively merciful in a context where it is never modeled to you, where you struggle to understand.

For Ghost, being kind- instead of simply being patient or tolerant- is a skill they are learning, slowly. Comparatively, striking an enemy down is something they are extremely good at. Being lethal is something they understand. Keenly. Efficiently. It is a point their disability is of no consequence.

As a result I think in many situations- the maggots, the menderbug, the nailsmith- there are points in which it is very easy for Ghost to strike something down, it seems easy and intuitive and they put up very little fight- and it is only after the body stops moving that we, as the player, are led to what Ghost feels- approaching on quiet feet, thinking, that’s dead. I did that.

.....Should I have done that?

I think a lot of the fandom wants Ghost to be in a better situation than they were. We can pick up that Ghost was unloved, was isolated, has spent an uncertain but quite possibly long time wandering through the twilit and forlorn wastelands beyond Hallownest. If they found other places, and other people, those other people noticeably did not leave much of a mark on Ghost, so that suggests they spent most of this time alone.

The reality is, while I think it is a noble goal to want Ghost to be able to be happy with others, that has to be tempered with the pragmatic awareness that who Ghost is now, is shaped by those things, for better and for worse, and not just in ways that mean they are sad. They are also confident, and self-sufficient, a warrior who sometimes lacks remorse and sometimes experiences it but too late.

In particular, with the menderbug, it’s an exciting insight into a mystery of the kingdom- why do the signposts repair themselves? and we see a new entity we haven’t before. We WANT TO INTERACT WITH THAT. So we run after, but we’re not fast enough, they fly away too quickly. What can we use to slow them down? We can stop them. We can stop them very well.

And, then we did. And we break them, and open their house, and read their diary, and it’s like...... oh. oh no. We just killed someone. We wanted to talk to them. We wanted them to stop. They didn’t stop and talk to us.

Ghost wanted to understand. They grabbed a familiar tool, and then afterwards wondered if there was some other, more esoteric to them thing they should have tried to wield instead. But they for the most part don’t have those tools. Why is the delicate flower so important to them? Because Ze’mer, in her own grief, taught them how to express grief and love/pity(?) to other people. They struggle with the ability to do that. Most of their social skills requires other people to stop and initiate. Several times, it’s ‘canon’ or clearly asserted cinematically that we see someone running ahead of us (Hornet, Nosk) and Ghost chases after them desperately trying to reach a point that other entity will talk.

Ghost’s tragedy is very overt to the audience, but, also, it’s left some complex facets running through their personality that are not just, sad. They’re a complicated person and being a silent protagonist doesn’t make them uncomplicated.

#Hollow Knight #readmore #Ghost is like... hypercompetent wayfarer battle tweenager #and ethics are complicated #and sometimes they do something and are like 'oh! that was a moral bad'#'hmm'#and there's nothing to do but stand there and stare at the body a little #Anonymous

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lovecolibri · 3 years

Note

Michael has always cared about Alex's happiness, but I agree with your previous anon's assessment that it looks like for the first time the narrative is going to acknowledge that Alex doesn't have to do all the work in their relationship supporting Michael 'to make up for stuff' while he is off doing whatever the hell he wants without consequences because he's never done anything wrong ever, which was always what Carina's weird twitter explanations came down to. I am so excited for him to get some actual development and have more stability in his life, and not because he wants to be with Alex but because he deserves to treat himself better than he has so far. Hopefully, any conversation they have about past hurts will let them both be honest about it and not just have Alex be even more of a martyr and act like he deserved to be punished for doing what was best for himself. That's the only foundation they can actually build a solid relationship on. Malex don't solely exist to make each other happy or to 'deserve' each other, even though that seems to be how some people in the fandom view at least one of them, and keeping score is beyond stupid at this point.

Yeah, season 2 was such a mess and they went so hard on burying Alex's emotions and having Michael suddenly acting like everything was perfect and he was so happy (though I will credit Vlams and the way his face and eyes sometimes told me a different story that the words he was saying), that a lot of Alex fans forget that season 1 was all about Alex walking away and Michael always feeling on uneven footing with him. Uuuugh, my heart just breaks in episode 2 where he is clearly picking up with that same energy flirty energy from wherever they left off last, and then seems so off kilter when Alex is now in a totally different space. Same with the drive-in and how he always just starts to settle into things when Alex pulls the rug out from underneath him. But on the other hand, you have the m*luca stans and Michael fans who are quick to rush in with all that information of "But Alex did XYZ so really he should be the one earning Michael back!" 🙄🙄🙄 You're so right, keeping score is stupid and I actually do love that Alex's song addressed that because it's exactly how I feel. They have both messed up and more than anything I want to see them both talk and get their feelings out in the open and apologize to each other, accept the apologies, and then move forward. Their actions may have hurt each other but it wasn't out of malicious intent and I think both Alex and Michael (and Tyler and Vlaims) understand that and I feel like they are more than ready to move on.

"I am so excited for him to get some actual development and have more stability in his life, and not because he wants to be with Alex but because he deserves to treat himself better than he has so far." YES! This is definitely what I want to see. Michael deserves good things that make him happy and make him feel good about himself. I think Alex is going to be one of those things. But it's not the only thing and I really want to have him and Alex comparing notes about the last year. I'm curious if they will be leaving Covid in as "in the past" still and if so, if we might get them telling each other some fun quarantine stories and maybe Michael talking about how he's been experimenting with plants, or spent the whole time at Isobel's learning to make bread or something like that. (and if we find out later he pent time doing metal work with the scraps at the junkyard and made Alex some kind of jewelry or key tag or something I would expire on the spot!)

I'm mostly just thankful we don't have to listen to c*rina try and tell us the "correct" way to interpret the show anymore (not that it will stop her from trying but her words hold a lot less weight now), and fingers crossed we get some good Malex conversations that can put the past to bed (oooh, but I am worried about how they will handle that too, probably with an "oh it was great and just what I needed at the time, but they weren't you"🙄 *barf*), and we can all stop keeping score and watch them be happy and build a relationship together. To again quote my current hyperfixation 911, when Buck says he hopes to find a great love someday, the old man says "You don't find it son, you make it." I am ready to see what they can build when they are on the same page. Malex are going to be an unstoppable force.

#my sweet nonnie friends #roswell nm #malex #rnm #roswell new mexico #anti miluca #it's time to stop playing 'who had it worse'#they both did #they both hurt each other even if it was unintentional #but they both survived and are healing #so let's let them finish healing together

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a-crimson-lion · 4 years

Text

Here's The Thing...

[Apologies in advance for those who are offended by the following post.]

Most People: Aw, look at these boys! Their relationship has grown so much! Why can't people see that when the evidence is right in front of-

Me: ...

Most People: What?

Me: Nope, I don't want to start.

Most People: Oh come on, man! You're always whining about how their dynamic is "flawed" and "toxic" and all that. This is a really wholesome momen-

Me: Did you not read earlier in the chapter?

Most People: ...what?

Me: Earlier in the chapter. Just before this panel. Right after All Might revealed Nana's Quirk...

Most People: Oh, you mean their banter? Yeah, that was adora-

Me: Katsuki literally told Izuku he wasn't go to catch up. He persistently reiterated the idea that he was going to get better while Izuku would get left behind wasting his time.

Most People: Well, yeah, but that's just Katsuki's way of encourageme-

Me: Would you feel encouraged or insulted if you had just recently gotten your new Quirk ON TOP OF a surprise new Quirk in the span of less than a year and then someone else would say you were incapable of learning how to handle more Quirks?

Most People: But Izuku doesn't seem bother-

Me: What you don't know can't hurt you. You can have a problem and never acknowledge it.

Most People: But... but...

Me: And let's talk about the start of the chapter, hm? Katsuki has no obligation to be in the room despite being in on the secret, so he could really just leave any time he wants-

Most People: But All Might was wasting time!

Me: And Katsuki says they're wasting his time. Not Izuku's, not the group as a whole, just Katsuki. He could have still told All Might to move the conversation along without making it about himself, but he didn't do that. Do you know how unnecessary that is?

Most People: ...

Me: All Might then talks about how the users of One For All operated. How they all died early in their lives, how the weren't the best, but they were something. And what does Katsuki say?

Most People: ...

Me: He says they have lame Quirks. He calls them a bunch of nobodies. He just straight up disrespects what they've been through, opting to focus on how flashy they were instead of their actions, in a typical Katsuki fashion. This kid has seen Blackwhip, he knows how smart Izuku can be, and yet he's putting all that aside tp maintain his own ludicrous ego.

Most People: ...

Me: I already mentioned the banter that occured between Izuku and Katsuki, but once again: does Katsuki offer to help Izuku? Does he offer any constructive insight? Does he keep his mouth shut? No, no, and no. He opts to once again bolster his pride, and drag down Izuku's in the process. That panel up there? That's not "Friendship Goals." That's a boy trying to hold a civil conversation with a megalomaniacal egotist who's barely even trying to learn how to be a decent person. Izuku doesn't even flinch because he's dealt with this for about a decade. How exactly is their friendship great?

Most People: But... but Dad Might-

Me: All Might's no help here, either. He knows just as much about Izuku and Katsuki's past as anyone else. He's as in the dark as everyone else. And I doubt he had many friends of his own during childhood, unless David Shield and Nighteye count later down the line.

Most People: ...but... but didn't Izuku say that he never thought he could speak to Katsuki so naturally?

Me: So? Everyone else could talk to Katsuki just fine in spite of his garbage personality. Sure, it's special that Izuku did it, but it's not impossible. Besides, it's not like Katsuki's saying anything new or helpful back to Izuku.

Most People: But... but the Wonder Duo!

Me: No. I'm done. I already said too much, and you all aren't going to take me seriously anyway. I'm sorry if I'm offending you right now, but I'm just calling it like I see it. And what I'm seeing is that Katsuki still hasn't changed all that much in spite of it being almost a year. I'm seeing that you're using Izuku's protagonist status to justify that because he sees himself and Katsuki as friends, they are friends, even though in reality Izuku, like any other protagonist, is not right all the time or perfect all the time, and therefore his word should not be taken at face value. I'm seeing through All Might and most of the fandom that you'll be wearing your rose-tinted glasses and completely ignore a person's actions in favor of what you wish to see because the alternative is too uncomfortable or too difficult to process. I'm not seeing what everyone else is seeing and frankly, I don't want to.

Most People: ...

Me: Sorry for wasting your time. Carry on.

-Crimson Lion (19 January 2020)

#bnha #boku no hero academia #mha #my hero academia #anti bakugo #anti bakugou #meta #character analysis #rant #long rant #vent #long vent #bnha 257 #i needed to get this off my chest #it really bothered me

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neoistic · 3 years

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what's going on with STAYs?

the hyunjin (and woojin) situation - a (very long) rant

DISCLAIMER : This post was not meant to slander Hwang Hyunjin or Stray Kids, it is intended to educate others on their problematic behaviour.

I'm gonna start at the beginning of all this. So unless you a.) live under a rock or b.) unlike the rest of us you have a life, then you have possibly heard of the idol bullying scandals. If you dont know what that is, I'll give a brief summary. A bunch of idols were being accused by former middle school or high school classmates of bullying. It started with Soojin of (G)I-dle and then the whole thing started rippling. Aisha of Everglow, Kihyun of MonstaX, Mingyu of SEVENTEEN, and many more. It's even gone as far as SA allegations. Basically everyone and their mothers were being dragged into the mess. However some of these accusation were later to be proven as false. Others have been somewhat half-true. The point is the majority of these idols end up going on a hiatus and stopped contributing in their groups activities for a while. It was a very frustrating situation. There's been apologies, addresses, fights occurring left and right. While these idols were being accused, everybody was like "let's wait for the official statement from the comany and see what is up, and then we make our decision from there. So for now lets stay our best to be neutral". That was the norm for a majority of fandoms. And then there were STAYs.

_____________________________________________________________ I think we've learned in the last five months that STAYs are anything but a normal fandom. After what has happened and the way they chose to behave entirely was embarassing. I feel like toxic STAYs really ruined the name of this fandom when the Woojin situation happened. But after Hyunjin was accused of bullying, they pretty much just shredded any redeeming qualities that fandom had left—all of it—everything went down the drain. Soon enough I feel like people are going to be embarassed to become a STAY or to mention that they're a STAY, because those motherfuckers really screwed this up If some of you're really confused right now, as to why I called STAYs toxic. It's because the base of this fandom is pretty privilege. Ok, let's start with the definition. What is pretty privilege? Pretty privilege is the principle that people who are deemed more attractive (based on societal beauty standards) have an upper hand in the world and are afforded many opportunities that us regular folks don't have. Like most other biases, pretty privilege is something we're all aware of—whether we have experienced it first-hand or not. Yet, it's not often that we are willing to admit or even talk about it, especially if we're on the receiving end of its benefits. This bias, also known as lookism, is defined as “Prejudice or discrimination on the grounds of a person's appearance” and occurs in a variety of settings such as social environments, workplaces and especially in this godforsaken fandom. Let me explain; everything that they do for the boys is simply based on looks. And how do i know that? Because when the baseless accusations that targeted woojin came out one of the things that i kept hearing over and over again was that they always thought he was 'ugly'. And that to me is very intersting because this fandom found him ugly but they didn't say anything, because he was in the same group as their faves. So they kept their mouths shut, and they acted as if they loved him they told him all the sappy bullshit. When he left they decided to pull an "Okay let's tell him how much we miss him, then dump it, and leave it there."

Consequently by cause of his so called 'wrongdoings' you're now telling people "Oh I found him ugly all along, but now I can finally admit it" which is an incredibly pathetic move. They were throwing shit everywhere based off unsubstantiated allegations. Through this I realised that everything goes down to looks. Because when this exact same thing happened to Hyunjin and his accusations, which at the time we did not know the legitimacy of it, the first thing they chose to tweet was"uhmm hyunjin is too cute to be a bully," say what now? You wanted to tell me you decide whether someone is capable of bullying based on their looks, how is that supposed work. Not everybody's heart is as beautiful as their face, I'm just saying. Like why on earth would you think that Hyunjin isn't a bully based on the fact that he's handsome but you believe the accusation about Woojin based off the fact that he is quote 'ugly'. You see the parallel difference between their behaviour towards them and that's because all they care about is looks and they will do just about anything to garner the attention of these boys. Yes, you're right, the reason behind their doings is because they know pefectly well that Stray Kids read their comment. Their defending them because they are desperately wanting their faves to pay attention to them. And they think by letting Hyunjin get away with everything, he would thank them for it.

_____________________________________________________________

Exhibit B; When the posts against Woojin came out the very first thing they told us was that, you have to believe the victim no matter what. It got to the point where even when we tried to reason with them about how there was no solid evidence, all they said was how they would rather believe a possible liar then a possible r4pist. ikr, oh. my. gosh. However when it's Hyunjin's turn to get blamed, believing the victim doesn't matter anymore. The actuality that people were already putting a judgement on the victim, and refusing to hear them out is just shocking to me.

The energy was completely different, for some crazy reason it didn't matter when it came to Hyunjin. When it came to Woojin we had to believe the victim because it's so damn important, and it got to the point that people were saying they believed Stray Kids that he 'bullied' them. Although Stray Kids didn't say anything, they never said a peep, a word, nothing. Everyone kept saying I believe Felix saying #8, i believe Chan and his vlive, are you for real? First of all what is Felix supposed to say then?? The group has 8 members not nine, is he supposed to put #9 in? #13? #24?? And with Chan he has already clarified that his statement on vlive that time wasn't about Woojin.

Then they were diagnosing them them of depression they were victimizing the poor boys of something they were not a victim of. So not are they speaking for them, they're telling us that you believe them off what you've stuff in their mouths, not things they said themsleves. On the other hand when Hyunjin was accused of bullying no we don't believe them we believe Hyunjin. What? Do you know him personally or what? You dont! I don't know what's the matter with you people. This fandom is just a no. You guys are left with no redeeming qualities whatsoever. Then you know what it gets even worse because if you think this is bad. It's not even half of it. How does it get worse? They were people saying that "It's bullying, its normal everybody does it," I don't know what universe you live in, but where I live down here, on earth bullying isn't something that everybody comes around and do. It's not a phase in life. "From ages 15-20 you're a bully" That doesn't happen it's not a chapter in life that everyone goes through like puberty, that's not what happens with bullying. You dont just wake up and go through a phase in you life that is inevitable, that you have to be a bully and a jerk to everybody, that's not a thing. You can't just sit here and justify bullying. Because how are you supposed to sit here and say that bullying is normal and that everybody does but when Woojin does it... You see where I'm going with this right? They said it wasn't okay for Woojin to bully Stray Kids and that he is a horrible person "how could he?" But then you bend over and said "Bullying is okay because Hyunjin is the one doing it" When he is on the receiving end it wasn't okay, though when he was the one administering it was completely fine and forgivable.

Do you not see how problematic you're being right now? You're justifying bullying because you think he's pretty? Are you playing with me? I read his statement and he apologized for his immature and insensitive demeanor, even he wasn't justifying it. the reason behind me mentioning this is because even JYP themselves specified that they would do a better job at picking trainees. That alone says something. They forthrightly threw him under the bus. Why would they do something like that? Because the allegations were true. Here's the thing, Hyunjin has not admitted to bullying anybody, what he has admitted to was being immature and hurting people with the way he spoke. That statement felt like he was beating around the bush about a lot of things. It's like "ok i hurt someone, I can't justify it, therefore I'm sorry" Okay but did u bully anybody? yes or no? That wasn't clarified. You guys can decide for your selves, but this was Hyunjin's and his former teacher's statement.

_____________________________________________________________

The message I'm trying to get accross from all this is that Stray Kids have way more power over you than you realized, and that is definitely not okay. To the point where you are throwing your morals away, just to defend them. You know what? no idol should have influence over you like that. I don't care how good looking, how hot, how sweet, how talented they are. I don't care if they grew up with a single mother and a story so sad it will make Simon Cowell cry. I don't care how many time they have supported the lgbtq+ community. I don't give a damn about how adorable they act on camera with their members. You can not validate immoral actions whatsoever. And no, you absolutely can not sit here being a desperate, self-absorbed, pick-me, dusty girl for a man who doesn't even know you.

Exhibit C; Before we end this I want to clarify something. STAYs did not became toxic because of the Woojin fiasco, this fandom always was toxic, and the Woojin situation simply revealed that. The facts are that they were always toxic, they were always messed up, they were always fake. The wreckage with Woojin showed us their true colors. That is the reality, my friends. As of now this fandom is directly taking the crown for trashiest fandom alive in kpop. At this degree I honestly don't know what else to say. I have no respect left for them. I do though want to say that I am genuinely sorry to all the kind STAYs, I'm sorry that you have to deal with this. Because in the near future I don't see this issue going away. Since Stray Kids is becoming more and more popular and it's never going to stop they're going to keep getting bigger and bigger, the story will just become more aparent. Thank you for listening to my long rant. And at the end of the day all I can say to STAYs is good luck, cause you'll need it.

_____________________________________________________________

anywho stream Still Dream

youtube

Sources:

https://www.myimperfectlife.com/features/pretty-privilege

https://www.koreaboo.com/series/stray-kids-hyunjin-bullying-allegation/

#stray kids #kim woojin #skz #bang chan #lee felix #changbin #seungmin #han jisung #lee know #i.n #hyunjin #hwang hyunjin #jeongin #kpop #hyunjin stray kids #still dream #cubs #jyp entertainment #Youtube

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