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aria-ashryver · 2 months

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SAAM2024 - SA Awareness Month

TW: SA, discussions around rape and sexual violence

Listen, I’m going to talk about something it isn’t easy or fun to talk about. I’m going to try and get a point across, and hopefully have it amount to something legible, because I am already feeling my body physically reacting with symptoms of stress.

I want to talk about sexual assault.

Did you know that April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month? And has been, for the last 23 years? Because I sure didn’t! Which is wild, considering I am a survivor of six separate incidents of sexual assault, two of which were penetrative rape.

I looked up the SAAM2024 hashtag and found crickets. Because who the hell wants to talk about sexual violence and rape on a random Thursday, right?

The thing is, we need to be having these conversations.

Of course, the onus isn’t on survivors to start the conversation — who would ask someone who is horrifically traumatised to open those scars again and talk about their trauma? I couldn’t even say the word “rape” for years.

[note: I have chosen not to censor the word rape here as a part of my own recovery process. Its just a word. I refuse to let it incite terror. Its just a word. ]

So who, then? If we could all talk about sex and sexual assault —if these were topics of conversation that weren’t so taboo to discuss— we could begin to take steps to make things safer for ourselves and for others.

So here I am, talking.

I feel it is important to destigmatise sex as this hush hush topic; it’s important to be able to discuss safe sex, consent, to differentiate what is just “bad sex” from what is assault. People are often quick to brush off encounters that give them the ick as just “bad sex”.

I was no different.

At sixteen, I didn’t have the terminology to describe what happened to me as rape. In a culture that glamorises illicit affairs and drunken hook-ups at parties, I didn’t have the comprehension to realise that what happened to me was not some sexy, drunken, desirable thing.

[trigger warning for more context around the first of my rapes]

I had been at a party, celebrating the wrap of my high school’s theatre production. I had been drinking underage and was extremely drunk*.

(*which in no way excuses what happened to me — it is important to take steps to dismantle rape culture and victim-blaming.)

There was a classmate I had been on a few dates with, and though we had been handsy during makeout sessions a few times, we had never discussed having sex. He offered to pick me up from the party, to give me a place to stay for the night. He had not been in attendance at the party, and was completely sober. By the time he drove us both home, I was already intermittently blacking out.

I have only a few memories of that night. One, crystal clear even to this day — a concerned classmate, grabbing my arm as I was heading out of the venue. The look of alarm on his face as he asked if I had a safe means of transport home. I lied to him. I have no idea why. I told him my mother was waiting in the vehicle that had just pulled up, and he let me go.

The next memory that I have is of his bedroom ceiling. A vague, blurred outline of his unclothed body over mine, as he was raping me.

Yes, we had been at that tentative, early stage of a potential relationship. Yes, I had taken him up on the offer to go to sleep at his house.

But, in the state I was in, there is no possible way I could have consented to sex.

I knew something was wrong, afterwards. I knew I spent the next night curled in a ball, sobbing in the shower for a reason. I knew there was a reason I froze up when a friend side-eyed me at school the following Monday, and said “you had sex with him, didn’t you?”. What I didn’t understand was that the reason was because I had been raped.

Because I didn’t have the vocabulary to describe my experience as such.

Because people don’t like to talk about sexual assault.

But we need to talk about sexual assault.

Conversations about sex can and should be removed from the concept of arousal. You can and should talk about sex without it being labelled as horny, or flirty, or suggestive — because it is just another topic to learn about.

Sex is an intricately nuanced thing that can mean so many different things to so many different people. There are elements of shame and embarrassment around sexual encounters sometimes; young and naive as I was, I was ready to take my crawling feelings of shame, self-blame, disgust, and put them down to “it was just bad sex”.

It wasn’t until long after the horror of my second, more violent rape, that I was able to pinpoint some of the trauma responses as being the same as that first time. There were patterns there, feelings that, had I been in a position of knowing more about safe sex and consent, I would have recognised sooner for what they were.

Its all well and good to go “hey! Don’t rape people!” and pat yourself on the back for your activism.

But the thing is, that kind of does sweet fuck all to actually help people who are at risk of experiencing sexual violence. What we really need is to take actionable steps toward improving people’s sexual safety and practises around consent and safe sex.

So what does that look like?

We talk about sex and consent without stigma.

We believe survivors and do not victim-blame

We practice respecting other people’s bodily autonomy in everyday scenarios, before it ever reaches a sexual context — if someone doesn’t want to hug you, respect their autonomy! If someone tells you to stop tickling them, even though they are laughing, hey, guess what? Respect their autonomy!

We remember what consent looks like, and take steps to inform others — consent is always clear, continuous, coercion-free, and conscious.

We make it second nature to take basic steps toward safety — never leave a drink unattended at a party! Stick to a buddy system to ensure people get home safe! Not because you suspect something will happen, it's just a default behaviour!

Be that classmate that tries to stop a drunk person walking out into the night alone.

The more we do these kinds of things, the less mystical and nebulous this whole “safe sex and healthy consent” thing becomes, and the safer we all are for it.

I’m gonna cut myself off here for my own wellbeing, as this has been extremely taxing, but let me provide a few links that I think are relevant. I hope this might be in some way helpful, and encourages others to continue the conversation offline. (or online, even -- reblogs are totally fine, and please feel free to add other stories or links if you have resources to share)

Be safe, and to any SA survivors who happen to be reading this, please know that you will always be yours, and what happened to you was not your fault. 💖

What is Consent (VeryWellMind)

History of Sexual Assault Awareness Month (NSVRC)

Sexual Violence Prevention: Beginning the Dialogue (NSVRC)

How to Support a Survivor (CRCC)

Finding Help If You’ve Been Sexually Abused (Crisis Text Line)

#tw sa #cw sa #cw sa mention #tw r*pe #SAAM #SAAM2024

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 1 year

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Drawn Together 5

Warnings: non/dubcon, obsession, intimidation, and other dark elements.

Character: Steve Rogers

Summary: You get a tattoo on an impulse to break your routine, but you walk away with something else as permanent as the ink.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

Your phone rings, shaking you from your trance. You haven't moved since you locked the door and ran upstairs. You sit on the sofa, one leg hooked tightly over the other as you bite your cheek and twine your hands around your knee.

You pry your fingers apart and stand. Each step is shaky and unsure. A branch brushes the window and you flinch, turning to gape at the pane. You watch the leaves wave in the breeze. The phone quiets as it rolls to voicemail.

The lull is brief as it once more begins to chime and you rush to grab it from beside the radio. You answer in a quaver, barely able to get your words out.

"Hello?"

"Hi," a lilted accent flows through the line.

"Hello, Marguerite," you reply, "how are you?"

"Yes, uh, I would like to let you know that Henri will not be attending his lesson tonight."

"No? I hope everything is okay," you toy with the edge of the doily beneath the retro radio.

"Oui, very okay," she drones, "it is only an unexpected circumstance. You take care, mademoiselle."

"I wi–"

The line clicks before you can finish. You have a bad feeling. That's so odd. Another blank space in the ledger.

You shake your head and curl your fingers around the phone as you pace. You hope it's just a coincidence.

You're jittery and you just can't stay still. You can still hear the way his voice sunk low. His words jumble together but his timbre remains, haunting your mind.

Your phone pings and an email bubbles up. Someone has reviewed your posting. You open your inbox and click on the link.

'Paid for lessons. Turned away due to discrimination. DO NOT PAY THIS SCAMMER.'

There is no name, just 'anonymous.' Oh, this is why you hate the internet. It's too much drama.

You know it's him. What you don't expect is the next comment.

'Very disappointed to hear. I will be discontinuing my son's attendance at once.'

You feel breathless as you lean on the table and place the phone flat. You drag your finger down as a new comment appears.

'My son was unable to attend his lesson today as there was a strange man hanging around screaming. The teacher does not provide a kid-safe environment. Do not bring your children here.'

Caroline at least has the nerve to sign her name. You don't understand. They know you. They know they can trust you.

She saw this crazy man and her reaction is to blame you. Typical. It's just like college. Just like that time. The incident you don't think about.

You login and go to your settings. You close the posting, not wanting any more rancor. You don't know what you're going to do. Go to the bank and talk to someone about your savings. You held onto your inheritance for a reason, right?

You leave your phone on the table and stride through the archway to the music room. You graze your fingers over the ivory keys before shutting the lid. No music today. You couldn't play if you tried.

You wish your grandfather was here to tell you what to do. To say in his gentle tone that it'll be okay. But you don't think it will be.

🎹

It's midnight. The old hanging clock ticks on the wall as you lay in silence, the fan blowing over you in the night's damp warmth. Rain falls but not hard enough to take the thickness from the air, only stirring it further.

You keep a sheet across your body, pulled over your stomach as you stare at the ceiling. You can't sleep. Usually you fall asleep before ten but tonight, you just can't close your eyes.

The scratching of the branch on the window keeps you alert, every creak, every groan of the walk up has you on edge. The hum of the fridge, the drone of the pipes, all those familiar are suddenly frightful.

You exhale and twiddle your fingers against your stomach. You aren't going to sleep. You know it.

You sit up and rub your forehead. Camomile. That always helps. You remember how your grandfather had a cup each night. You kept a package around just for the memory.

You get up and tug the cotton gown away from your figure as it clings to your sweat. Your steps creak down the hallway and you emerge in the shadows of the music room, a darkness clustering beyond the stairs. An eerie tingle crawls up your arms.

You stop as you notice the curtains pushed to the very edge of the rod. You closed that window, you’re sure of it. Just like every night, you went over your routine.

Windows, door, everything locked up tight, except for the bedroom. You kept the pane halfway up, no more, no less. Just enough to let in the air.

You tiptoe over and look outside. You see the tree looming and hear the crickets. There's nothing, no one there.You pull down the frame and flip the latch.

You stay there for just a minute and watch the moonlight flicker through the foliage. It's getting to you. You're forgetting things. Important things.

You back away and go into the kitchen. As you enter, there's a click. You peer around, turning slowly in place. You flick on the light above, the bulb casting amber through the glass shade.

You see nothing but what you expect. The silver fridge, the brown counters, the pantry door, and the small square table with its for handbuilt chairs. You go to the stove and put the kettle onto the burner as you crank the knob.

You stand at the stove and wait. The anxiety winds inside your stomach as you pick at your nail and bite your cheeks. What can you do? You can hand out flyers? Maybe find a different place to post?

Ugh it's all such a mess and because of him. A stranger! You don't know him. Why does he care so much?

You hate to judge someone by their looks but you should've known from the start he was trouble. You did, you just didn't want to accept that. You didn't want to have a mean thought.

The kettle begins to shake and you watch the steam plume from the spout. You remove it to keep it from whistling and you take out a cup and packet of tea. The simple steps ease your addled nerves.

You pour the hot water over to steep the bag and retreat with your cup to the table. You sit and tap your fingers on the trim of the placemat. The old woven things fray along the edge, the embroidered berries fading into the grey.

You drop your head into your hands and sigh. Maybe you need a break. Dip into your nest egg and figure things out.

You prefer monotony but life doesn't go according to plan. That's the sole lesson you took from your grandfather's death. Nothing lasts forever.

This won't either, right?

🎹

You're awakened by a crash. You sit up and let out a gritty yelp. You roll out of bed, tangled in the sheets and off balance.

It's still dark out. You barely remember going back to bed. Your head is fuzzy and your lashes crusty from the depth of your slumber.

You let the sheet drape down to the floor as you stumble to the doorway. You notice the flowers on the floor, the vase in pieces in a puddle of water. The window is open again.

You rush over and shove down the window without a thought to the shards at your feet. You lock it and stagger away, narrowly missing the glass with your sole. You turn, squinting in the dark as you find your way back to the kitchen.

The pantry door is open. You swallow as you turn on the light again, bracing yourself for some villain to emerge. The glow reveals no monster waiting among the dry goods.

You go forward to slam the door shut. You lean on it and peek at the small clock that ticks above a vintage barometer. It's barely 2am.

Your heart pumps loudly as you go to the table where your empty cup still sits. You must've forgotten to take it to the sink. You pick it up and an unexpected weight lingers at the bottom.

You peer past the brim and see the item inside. The crumpled head of a poppy. It seems one of those left in the road in Steve's anger. But how did it get there?

Is this a dream? If it is, why can't you wake up.

#steve rogers #dark steve rogers #dark!steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #drabble #dark drabble #dark!drabble #series #drawn together #mcu #marvel #captain america #tattoo au #au

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bonny-kookoo · 1 year

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Jungkook

𝓜𝓮𝓪𝓷𝓽 𝓽𝓸 𝓫𝓮 : I can't save us

There are lessons in life no one should have to learn.

Tags/Warnings: Angst, hurt & Comfort, Idol!Jungkook, Hybrid!Reader, Cat Hybrid!Reader, mentions of depression and depressive thoughts, heartbreak, homelessness, it's a bit heavy sorry, mentions of mental abuse and manipulation, betrayal, slow burn, eventual smut, dead dove do not eat

Dead Dove do not eat: warning for potentially triggering content that can't be tagged without spoiling the story.

Length: 2.5k words

-> Masterlist

~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~

"Have you informed police about it?" Yoongi wants to know, sitting on the youngest's couch, but the idol in question immediately shakes his head.

"They'll put her into a shelter, and she would stay forever in there due to the fact that you can't put a legal NDA on her- so the company told me she could never be adopted by anyone ever again- they, they'd make sure of it-" Jungkook rambles, holding his head, and Yoongi feels both confused and concerned over the entire situation. He himself never really knew why Jungkook suddenly gave his hybrid away back then- he never really talked about it, avoided the topic, so the rapper simply assumed you both broke up and decided to part ways. But from what he hears right now, Jungkook still very obviously still cares about you.

So what really happened?

"But if you care about her so much, why'd you give her away?" He wonders, looking at the younger Idol in front of him.

"When.. Jin-hyung got engaged, remember?" Jungkook tries to explain himself. "The stalking, the comments, the airport incident, the protests- I… got scared. I just wanted her to be safe, a-and when I saw everything happen to him, I just felt so awful because I never thought of that.." He rambles, making Yoongi nod in understanding.

"I mean, I won't lie and say it was a cakewalk-" Yoongi starts. "But they got through it, didn't they? No one really cares about it anymore." He shrugs.

Jungkook stays silent at that, looking at nothing in particular, while his hands hold the tri-colored dog plushy that belonged to you at some point. "Jungkook.. you're not fine." Yoongi tries to reason next to him. "And you won't be fine unless you either fix this, or close this chapter-" He attempts, but Jungkook shakes his head, letting his head hang low.

"There's no fixing anything, hyung." He sighs in defeat. "There's nothing left to fix." The idol simply says, seemingly having given up.

"You're not even trying-" Yoongi shakes his head, but Jungkook grows irritated at that, it seems like.

"I've tried!" He argues with teary eyes. "I've tried, I failed, and I can't accept it!" He sobs, fingers clenching the soft material of the plush toy. It's long lost any scent of you, and he feels terrible for it. He should've just left it in your room, where it would've waited loyally until he himself would man up and bring you back home. But was this even a home to you anymore?

He can't tell.

What's the point of anything if he completely fucked up not only his potential future, but yours as well? He's taken every chance of a happy life from you because of his own selfishness back then. Because he didn't think it through, didn't realize that there were issues at hand that he should've been able to foresee. But he had been blinded by his own love for you that he was convinced love alone would be enough down the line. That if he loved you enough, the world would protect you as well.

But it doesn't work like that.

"How about we go one step at a time?" Yoongi wonders from the side, careful not to rile the young man up again. "one step at a time, nothing more."

"But every step I take towards her will only make it worse.." Jungkook denies, shaking his head. His eyes are still red from crying, head aching from the force of his sobs. He can't deal with the fact that you're still outside, sleeping god knows where, probably running off further and further away from him. Maybe you're not even there anymore, maybe you've been hit by a car, run over by a train-

"Jungkook you're having a panic attack-" Yoongi worries, trying hard to calm his friend down. "We can get her back here, just for now, okay? We can bring her here where it's warm, where she's safe- Jungkook there's security here, no one will harm her here." He attempts to push through whatever train of thought is running through his friend's mind at the moment.

"And then what?!" Jungkook breaks out. "She hates me, she has to- I hate myself too.!" He confesses, and the producer nods in front of him.

"I know, Jungkookie." He nods in sympathy. "I know you do."

~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~

"Come on tannie, do your business so we can go back inside!" Taehyung whines, watching his tiny dog roam around the streets, a rare break from the rain having given him a chance to have his dog go a little round outside to stretch his own legs as well for once. The weather is terrible, and he hopes that everyone's safe tonight.

His dog is yapping at something in the distance, before he seems to try and jump up at a person, a white cat tail peeking out from a little oversized dark blue coat. Similar to one Jungkook used to have, he thinks to himself, as the person bows down to pet the dog.

Wait.

Taehyung walks closer, can't see your face- but he knows it must be you. He doesn't know the entire story, or what's really going on- but he knows that Jungkook and you were together at some point, until you both broke up, the reason never declared to anybody. And he himself didn't ask- at the end of the day, he'd hoped his best friend would open up to him at some point himself, but he never really did. What were you doing back in Seoul? Last time he saw you, you'd taken a train.

"Hey- you should probably go inside soon, before the weather gets worse again." Taehyung tells you, picking up his dog. "I'm sorry he's barking so much. He doesn't like cats." He apologizes, and you just nod, smiling at the little dog. And much to his surprise, you reach out to pet him, something the Pomeranian eagerly accepts. "Oh? You're just excited?" He asks his dog, and you nod as if to answer for him.

He gets why Jungkook liked you. You seem very friendly, but also calm in nature- and from what he can see, you're very pretty as well.

"Hey- Jungkook asked about you a few days ago." Taehyung tells you, and you tense up at that, as if you just realize who he is. "He never really said what happened between you two?" He questions. "Though, it's fine if you don't wanna say. It doesn't really concern me, I was just wondering." He shrugs, and you don't answer. Ah yes- he remembers Jungkook once said something about you being really quiet. "Well-" He nods, bowing respectfully to you. "-take care, okay?" He offers, and you nod, before pointing at him as if to say 'you too'.

Before you leave, swallowed up by the night.

And he can't help but feel a bit weird.

~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~

You're sure he just wants you to go back to Hanako.

You won't be doing that- Hanako doesn't want you, and shouldn't be forced to take care of you. You didn't even need to hear why he was there- his scent had immediately alerted you of his presence. You could never forget him at any point in your life. He's haunting you like a bad dream, constantly filling your mind. You were definitely stupid to even come to Seoul- but your transportation ticket has expired at this point, giving you no legal way of getting out of here.

You don't want to go back to Hanako. She should live her own life, and not spend it taking care of you. It's not fair.

You didn't sleep at all since yesterday- somehow now terrified of him finding you at any point, forcing you to go back where you came from. He's mad, isn't he? You didn't do what he said, even if he didn't even say anything at all. Will he send out authorities after you now? Has he told police you're missing yet? You can't trust anybody now, shouldn't- or maybe you should dye your hair and hybrid features, maybe that would help you at least a little not to stand out anymore. Maybe that'll help.

Maybe it'll make you a better ghost.

You're awfully tired today, but not as in sleepy. Your muscles feel weak, like you've done a horrible workout- but they're not hurting. It's more like they just won't work the way they're supposed to- and it's making you stumble and trip constantly, jeans already cut open by the pavement ground. You're also not sure anymore where exactly you are- you know you should remember these streets, but the memories are foggy, unclear, making you unsure and scared of your surroundings.

And your arm is hurting, skin tender and muscles below aching bad.

You know you shouldn't scratch it, but you can't help the irritating feeling of it bothering you to the point of tears. You've got no money for food left, nothing to really buy you anything- and in a way, it feels like the end.

Like you're about to become a real ghost.

Is Jungkook at home? He must be, considering its pretty late, and the weather is still pretty bad outside. No one really wants to be out in the rain like this, the wind constantly blowing your hair around, wet strands sticking to your face. It forces you somewhere more secluded, a parking lot belonging to an apartment complex- having you climb over a fence to get to it, a more tedious action than usual considering your physical state. You know something's wrong with you, but you can't really do much about it, can you? Going to a hospital would just lead you into a shelter, or worse, back to Hanako who's probably happy right now you're not with her.

You just want to sleep a little, right here, underneath the little roof for the bikes standing around. It's not dry at all, but it's at least something. It's a dark corner where no one will see you until tomorrow morning when everyone will start going back to work. It'll be alright until then.

You just need a little nap, you think, as you curl up in the very corner to close your eyes just for a moment.

~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~;~✿~

"Let's go." Yoongi offers suddenly, getting up.

"What?" Jungkook whines almost in protest, before his friend forces him up from the couch as well.

"Grab a blanket or something we can put in the back of my car. We're gonna go out, search for her, get her back home." He says.

"But what if it's not home for her anymore?" Jungkook weakly protests. "She-"

"One. Step. At. A. Time." Yoongi shakes his friend by the shoulders a little. "First, find her. Then, get her here, where she can warm up, where we can talk. Step after step Kook, no running this time." He scolds, and Jungkook weakly nods, walking into his bedroom to fetch a blanket.

Later in the car, it's silent for a moment- until Yoongis car alerts him that someone's calling his phone. A little annoyed, he declines it, instead turns towards his friend in the passenger seat.

"Where do you think she might've gone to?" Yoongi asks the Idol sitting next to him in the car. The rapper has put down the seats of his car in the back, making room for you to comfortably lay in in case they find you tonight- a thick blanket covering the interior of the backseats and trunk area.

"I don't know." He sighs in defeat, trying to keep an eye on everything passing by as they drive around the neighborhood you were last seen- but there's no sight of you. "She's probably hiding. Hyung, the weather is so bad-" He worries, watching how they have to drive a bit slower to not spray the water everywhere on people walking past them, and his fears only grow when the first lighting of the night rips through the sky above. It's barely seen amongst the tall buildings, and for the first time, he feels small, tiny, insignificant. Do you feel intimidated by the tall structures? He remembers when you first met, you told him he was scary because he was so much taller than you.

Tall things scare you. You've got a fear of heights, a fear of flying.

"I know it's scary, but focus." Yoongi offers, driving carefully. "She's smart though, isn't she?" He offers, and Jungkook nods almost on instinct. Of course you're smart. The smartest around, the smartest cat he's ever known. "Then she must've tried to find shelter around somewhere further away after she's noticed you. She wouldn't want to get caught in case authorities are after her- she doesn't know you didn't call anybody, right?" He asks, and Jungkook nods again. "See? So she probably wandered a bit further away, tried to find somewhere secluded, sheltered, where she could sleep for tonight."

Yoongi is right. But still, it worries Jungkook greatly that there's no trace of you, that he can't seem to figure out where you could've gone. He's lived together with you for years, has loved you- but right now, he's so unsure of everything he's done and doing and going to do, that he doesn't trust in anything his mind comes up with. It could all just make it worse, and he doesn't want to make it worse.

He's done that enough.

Taehyung calls again, and this time, Yoongi accepts, well aware that his friend won't stop until he's picked up the call.

"Taehyung- it's not a good timing right now." Yoongi says into the car's speaker system as he accepts the call from the younger singer.

"Yeah I know, but Jungkook isn't picking up his phone." He whines almost, in the background the sound of Yeontan's nails clicking on the floor. "Has he made up with his ex?"

"I'm in the car, what are you talking about?" Jungkook snaps almost irritated. He doesn't like that word, 'ex' all that much. It implies that you two broke up, which.. never actually happened. You were broken up by everyone around you, but you never chose to break up willingly. That's a huge difference to him.

"Oh, hey" Taehyung greets. "It's just- cause I saw her outside a few minutes ago, and-" He says, but immediately, both Yoongi and Jungkook try to interrupt him.

"Where?!" The youngest bandmember asks, leaning into the control console of the car as if that would make his friend answer quicker. "Taehyung, where the fuck did you see her?!" He presses.

"Uh, near your apartment, why?" He asks. "I thought she came from yours, that's why I thought you two made up or something.." He says, and one look towards Yoongi is all it takes.

His hands immediately setting the turn signal before he rushes back.

#bts imagine #bts fanfic #bts fic #jungkook imagine #hybrid imagine #jeon jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook imagine #bts jungkook fanfic #bts jungkook imagine #bts jeon jungkook imagine

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twistedwonderlandimaginesblog · 1 year

Text

Just Another Business Deal [Azul Ashengrotto]

Voted on here!

Azul considered this just another business meeting.

Sure, he was dressed fancier than he might be, a little stiffer too as he was out of his element when it came to socializing for fun. If he hadn’t been invited by such an important client he wouldn’t have thought twice about turning down the invitation, but they were rich, powerful, and had a full list of friends with pockets just as heavy. He had come up with a few topics to breach to see if anyone might be interested in cutting a deal with him, his business card tucked into his inside pocket (which he double-checked before entering the party).

He’s thankful he didn’t have to pretend to be interested in a bride and groom sharing their first kiss, the afterparty being much better for his business. He greeted them both politely and with a simple gift, something ‘on the house’ from his restaurant that he hoped would draw them and their rich friends in, but he was quick to find himself a table to get a moment to himself. The dance floor was full of excitement which meant he wanted a safe distance, close enough to watch and reveal potential interesting secrets but not close enough to get drawn in.

He didn’t think this party might flip everything on its head for him, but an opportunity was an opportunity. He wasn’t holding his breath for anything groundbreaking to happen nor did he suspect he’d stay long; if he had brought along Floyd he was sure he’d be making a scene on the dance floor while Jade would be talking about the types of poisonous mushrooms you could slip into punch and no one would notice.

This moment would be even worse if he had brought them, he thinks in hindsight, and perhaps it was luck that he had decided at the last minute not to drag them along.

As fate would have it his eyes drifted over to the bride and grooms special table, where they were surely being disgustingly in love. He respected his parents for understanding boundaries when they remarried, especially when he was present, but he supposed it was this couple’s happy day so he couldn’t judge them too harshly. But as he did look over he caught sight of something, someone, he hadn’t seen in so many years. He thought he might be seeing things.

He wasn’t.

Azul is shell-shocked, knowing that he’d never be able to mistake another person for you. No one but you could give him a full body reaction like this, his chest tight, his hands bawled into fists as he tried to regain his composure. You were on the arm of another, leaning casually against them as you spoke to the bride; it seemed you were good friends, sharing a cheery laugh and a brief hug before you returned to your dates side.

No matter how he tried he couldn’t pull his eyes off you, thinking how well the formal wear you were in tonight suited you. The colors made your skin practically glow, a deity here on earth meant to bless everyone who saw you. He watched as you laughed, covered your mouth to avoid laughing at something that was clearly not meant to be humorous, his mind had veered completely off of business onto something else entirely.

And then his card appeared.

He couldn’t possibly know what had triggered the bride to speak about him, or his gift, but she flashed you the card with a bright smile. You seemed to have no reaction at first but Azul thinks your eyes might’ve widened the tidiest bit. You processed the information for a moment longer before you suddenly turned your head to scan all around you, eyes seeking him out even if unintentionally. He felt himself sink lower into his seat, just enough to hide behind a few dozen people in the crowd but it wasn’t enough.

Your eyes met, and they lingered, and you refused to be the first to break.

Azul had always been a tricky one to deal with but when it came to emotions it seemed he was even worse. You didn’t blame him for not wanting to get into a relationship in your early days at NRC together but even when you tried to connect as adults, he was simply too busy. He went home for a bit, but he always seemed drawn back to land, having successful restaurants across the board. You had almost gone to a few of them but the thought of him being there, of seeming him again, it made you too nauseous to eat.

Your family friend who had escorted you continued the conversation unbothered even as you and Azul engaged in a staring contest, neither of you willing to break. He was as stubborn as you were even if he was the one who had turned tail first.

“I’m going to sit over there.” You boldly declared, regretting it the second you said it out loud. Your friend nodded and told you he’d be right over with drinks, leaving you to slowly make your way through the crowd. You could’ve moved faster but you wanted Azul to really sweat it out, wondering if he’d make a great escape or simply deal with the problem presented to him.

“Hello.”

“…It’s been a long time since we’ve seen each other.” Azul offered up, standing and politely pulling out your chair. It seemed his manners hadn’t died even if his romantic interest in you had. “How are you?”

“I’m fine. How are your businesses? I see you’ve got a shiny new card.”

“Would you like one?” It’s a reflex now to reach into his jacket like it was nothing, holding a card between two fingers and presenting it to you. You stared at his hand like you might slap it but instead you took the card, delicately turning it over so you could see the intricate design he’d gone with.

“Thanks. This’ll help me contact you since I know you won’t let a potential business deal go to a voicemail.” Oof, vicious as ever, Azul had to fight not to visibly wince at the venom in your comments. “We have things to talk about Azul. I miss you. You think you can schedule time with an old friend into your busy life?”

An old friend? That’s all? Azul would’ve laughed if he knew he could get away with it.

He doesn’t think you’ve ever been so direct before, and it was causing his face to grow hotter by the moment. He was from a world of carefully crafted verbiage, so he didn’t know how much meaning to pull from your statement. Shouldn’t he be tearing it apart and applying meaning where you might have meant nothing? And those words, that you missed him, what could that be about?

He would only know if he picked up the phone.

#Disney TWST #Disney Twisted Wonderland #TWST #Twisted Wonderland #Azul Ashengrotto #TWST Imagines #Twst x reader #twisted wonderland imagines #twisted wonderland x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #scenario #poll prompts

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bugbro · 4 months

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Important Internet Safety PSA!

This post is specifically targeted at minors.

Hi kiddos! I'm making this post to remind all regressors on here that they should be extra sure to stay safe online!

For a while now, I've seen minors posting things that are not safe 🙅 but anyone can benefit from following these tips. Especially those who regress, and can be mentally children at times, should be extra cautious online.

Warning! : mentions of potentially triggering topics in relation to online safety, stranger danger, etc. Please only read when big, not regressed!

Read Under The Cut ⬇️

Things Minors Should Not Share Online:

1) Your Real Name.

Never share your full name online. Your first name is less dangerous, but if you can, I would still go by pseudonym (Ex: Sunny, Lambie, Tiny, Bear, Baby Bat, etc.) or fake name. Your name may feel innocent, but personal information is very important.

2) Your Location.

This one feels obvious, but more people do it than you think! Yes, I mean do not share your address...but I also mean: Do not share what school you attend. Do not share what state you live in. Do not share what city you live in.

3) Your Age.

Do not tell anyone that you are a minor. People online should not know that you are a child. As a child, you are especially vulnerable to being targeted by people online.

Age regressors in general are pretty commonly targeted by p/redators online, but stating you're a minor won't make you more safe from them - it will make those predators more likely to want to message you.

Remember to also not share your birthday! Your exact birth date is personal info. If you wish to share birthday stories, gifts, etc, or tell people of your birthday, be broad. Mention it's your birthday month at the beginning/end of the month :) rather than the exact day.

4) Your Triggers.

People online should not know what specific things trigger you. This information can be used against you. Yes, this includes information in DNIs.

If you must have a DNI, be generic.

"DNI if you post kink, blood, eating disorders, transphobia, these things trigger me." is too much personal information. This is just a list of things that trigger you. People online should NOT know this information. ❌ ❌

❤️ Generic DNI examples:

"DNI if your blog is unsafe for children"

"DNI if you post N/S/F/W content."

"DNI if your blog is k/i/n/k, c/g/l, or NSFW." ❤️

Remember to use your block button liberally, for anyone who makes you uncomfortable.

5) Photos of yourself.

There are multiple reasons why posting photos of yourself, as a minor, may not be a good idea.

First, regression is very stigmatized. Choosing to connect your face to something so stigmatized is a very big decision, one that can be difficult to make at a young age. The internet is forever, and it's very important to consider how you might feel about these photos later in life.

Second, regression is SFW, but p/redators don't care. While the pictures of you with a paci, or you in a diaper may be completely innocent and nonsexual, bad people can still access them. This doesn't mean you can never post photos - but waiting until you're old enough to really understand the risks is a good idea.

In general, photos of your regression can be unsafe but...you can share photos without you in them! Pictures of your snacks, or a toy can be nice to share. Just make sure there's no personal, or identifying info in your pictures :) and then show off your cute drawings or toys.

Personal information is very precious. Be very careful with who you share it with! If you are an adult, you have the knowledge to make the decision on whether or not you think it's a good idea to share this information. But if you are a child, you're usually not old enough to understand what sharing personal info can mean.

I know a lot of these may feel really restricting. You might think "isn't that a little much?" and yes, they can be a lot to ask. But staying safe is super important.

It's important for you kiddos to remember that most of you are in categories that can make you extra vulnerable. Being minors, being neurodivergent, being queer, having faced past trauma, being an age regressor...are all things that can make you especially vulnerable.

If you decide to share these things anyway, I hope I've encouraged you to try to do so sparingly. Maybe you can share some of these, but decide to make others private.

Stay safe kiddos!

#internet #internet safety #agere #agere safety #age regression #agere caregiver #agere tips #agere help #safety #sfw interaction only

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hunky-horror-husband · 5 months

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Welcome to our new hell~

->this is a Transformers role-play blog; main blog is @withoutalice

Your guide:

This blog is multi-muse! But mainly Overlord (see more below)

This blog is multi-ship! 💕

This blog posts suggestive content, but NO outright smut (all suggestive -however slight- IS tagged as #suggestive)

I reserve my independence to not answer asks if I deem the topic too intense for MY BLOG OR OTHERS SAFETY

Themes range from shitposts to headcanon musings to canon/AU-verse story telling

If you know anything about Overlord (and my other muses) this blog is comfortable with gore and violence, but NEVER SUPPORTS OR ENCOURAGES THESE ACTIONS IN REAL LIFE! (to avoid gore, block the #tw robogore tag!)

If you struggle with unreality, this BLOG ISN'T FOR YOU. DNI AND PLEASE BLOCK

OC's, other fandoms, and even those who know nothing about Transformers who are potentially interested ARE SO VERY WELCOME! :)

Once again: STAY SAFE. ALL WORKS ON THIS BLOG ARE FICTIONAL.

Muses:

Overlord (main) -> if you open an ask and don't specify who you want me to respond as, you'll get a response from the blue murder-brick :) Sunder (secondary) -> He's one my favorite Transformers. The Sunder that talks with Getaway about the life chords is the defaults in my responses :3 Froid (secondary) -> once again, really underrated and super fun to write. has a few fanfics influencing him but he's still his unethical psychologist self :p

Rossum (secondary) -> yeah. That one guy who was in two panels and said "congrats! It's a phase sixer!". I love him (muses to be updated as time goes on)

Helpful tags:

Blog organization: #OOC: Alice speaks -> blog updates, PSAs, etc. #verse: canon -> whenever it's just regular old canon versions of the character's responding #verse: ??? -> (I will be updating verse tags as the blog goes on)

#*checks doctors note* yes thats the one -> anything that's Trepan's aesthetic

Overlord's tags: #hunky horror husband -> things that are Overlord's aesthetic #[🩵] in character -> when roleplaying as Overlord

Sunder's tags: #that's so lobotomy-core -> things that are Sunder's aesthetic #[❤️] in character -> when roleplaying as Sunder

!!! TAG CHEATSHEET TO BE UPDATED OVER TIME !!!

Once again ->

THIS BLOG IS NOT UNREALITY FRIENDLY. THIS BLOG HAS ALL SUGGESTIVE MATERIAL TAGGED AS #suggestive THIS BLOG HAS ALL GORE TAGGED AS #tw robogore IF YOU THINK THIS BLOG MAY TRIGGER YOU, PLEASE DNI AND BLOCK!!! STAY SAFE!!! I reserve my independence to not answer asks if I deem the topic too intense for MY BLOG OR OTHERS SAFETY

On lighter notes,

Have fun, goof off, and build community! Non TF roleplayers are welcome!!! this blog loves shitposts and crossovers :D

Of course, feel free to ask me (Alice) questions anytime! ~Alice

#tf overlord #overlord #maccadam #maccadams #transformers #transformers roleplay #intro #disclaimer #roleplay #rp blog #sunder #tf sunder #mtmte sunder #mtmte froid #froid

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mageofseven · 11 months

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MC Talking about Trauma they Experienced (Luce, Dia, Satan, Beel & Belphie)

Edit: this has been in my drafts for a while now. I started this one day when my depression was really bad and this was actually very therapeutic to write.

However, I got super emotionally exhausted from it and sort of abandoned it and since then, I've been debating whether to finish it, delete it, or post it as is.

After some thinking, I decided to add another character or so to the post and then post it.

Please, please check the trigger warnings below and do not read anything you can't handle.

Please protect yourself and always check for trigger warnings.

Now everything below this message is what I wrote originally that night.

Stay safe and if you do still read this, thank you for your time!~

~~~~~~~~~~

I wanted to write this because it's been on my mind; I'm autistic so I tend to have zero filter and over share things, but often in a nonchalant way, like I'm telling you about a cat I saw outside and not about things I talk to my therapist about on a weekly basis.

Basically, this is a post where MC shares bad memories (whether in an upset or nonchalant way) and we see how the Boys react.

So like, angst ahead, but the kind that might hit too close to home for some people.

I'll keep it all below the cut so you don't have to read anything potentially triggering for you if don't want to.

TW: physical abuse, emotional manipulation, child abuse, alcoholism, parents with anger issues

•▪︎▪︎◇°●♡●°◇▪︎▪︎•

Lucifer:

"MC, we're not having that for dinner for the 4th night this week."

"But...what will I eat then?"

The man sighed.

"I don't know. I'll have to figure something out." He told them. "Honestly, meal planning would be a lot easier without your food sensitivities."

The human stared into space, mind seemingly far away.

Lucifer raised an eyebrow before stepping closer.

"MC? Is something wrong, Love?"

"I'm remembering the time my mom slapped me on the face at a community barbeque in front of everyone there because she wasted money on buying me a ticket for an event without any food I could eat; I ran away and hid so I could cry and hyperventilate without people judging me."

His eyes widened.

"When did this happen?"

The human shrugged.

"I dunno. A few years back." They guessed. "I didn't get to have any food at all that day because my mom was so mad at me."

Lucifer took their hand and squeezed it.

"Well, you aren't with your mother anymore." The man smiled bitterly before adding. "I suppose we could just order pizza for tomorrow's dinner."

"No peppers? No olives?" The human asked, surprised.

"No peppers, no olives." He nodded.

"No iguana eyes? No anglerfish lantern?"

"None." He promised, despite knowing Beel's disappointment at the last two toppings not being on the pizza.

MC smiled and squeeze their boyfriend's hand back.

"Thank ya, Luce~"

The man's smile became softer.

He made a mental note to ask for Barbatos' help with finding more foods his Love can eat, but for now, the demon just didn't want MC thinking back on such horrible memories.

Like always, Luce just wanted to treat his Love how they deserved and not how they've always been treated.

Diavolo:

The two were discussing the prince's relationship with his currently deep-slumbering father.

It wasn't a topic Dia liked to speak about, but as his relationship with MC deepened, he found himself confiding in her with things he used to avoid discussing.

"...so in fairness, maybe we were never going to be close, considering the circumstances."

MC looked away, tears in their eyes.

"My Queen..." Diavolo brought his hand to their cheek. "Forgive me, I didn't mean to upset you with this."

MC shook their head.

"No, its not you." They told their boyfriend. "I just...I kinda relate in a a way..."

The prince brought the human into arms before kisskng their forehead.

"I can tell you have something in mind to share; you can share it with me."

MC was quiet for a moment before nodding.

"Once when I was a kid, we had a speaker come to class to teach us about child abuse. They handed out these pamphlets and explained to us that if our parents do any of the stuff that we talked about that day then we could call a number in the pamphlet..."

The demon tightened his embrace around them, not liking where this story was headed.

"I...I remember learning that a lot of stuff my parents did to me and my siblings was bad," They continued. "So I went home and told my parents that a speaker came to school and he told me that if they keep doing bad things and mistreat me that I could call the number on the paper..."

The human's tears fell down their cheeks, followed by Dia kissing them away.

"My Queen..."

"Ya know what they said to me?" They asked rhetorically. "They said 'Do it. I dare you'. Told me those people would take me and my siblings away, put us in foster care and split us up. That I would never see them or my brother or sister or my grandparents or anyone that I loved ever again...and told me they wouldn't even care, that they could just 'make another just like me' and that I would be responsible for my siblings' and my own suffering while my parents would just be happy to get rid of me."

The prince pulled MC into a tighter embrace as they cried.

"I wanted a good relationship with my parents so badly, but how do you become close with people who tell you at such a young age that you are replaceable and a burden they didn't even want?"

"You don't." He said softly in their ear as he stroked their hair. "Your parents were miserable people who never deserved having you as their child; they made sure of that."

The man leaned back to look them in the eyes.

"My Queen...I'm sorry you went through that. Please remember that you didn't deserve it though."

MC nodded.

"I...I know. Logically anyway...but it doesn't feel true, ya know?"

"Oh MC..."

Diavolo took the rest of the day off work, regardless of any urges or reminders from Barbatos.

This man wanted so desperately to comfort his beloved and heal the hole in her heart.

Still, the man knew there was not much he could do for the latter; this was just something his Queen had to work through on their own.

That wasn't going to stop this man from showering them love and reminding them just how perfect and sweet they are to him.

Satan:

Satan had gotten into an argument with Lucifer, resulting in one of his fits of rage.

They were so rare now of days; this was essentially the oldest bringing up the wrong thing at the wrong time and pushed it too far

Causing Satan to destroy half of the living room and the two 'brothers' screaming at one another.

This went on for a while till the two men noticed the human in the corner hyperventilating.

That knocked the blonde out of his anger real quick as he raced to their side.

Lucifer allowed the argument to pause for now, considering the human's condition, and so left them be.

Eventually, MC calmed down enough and launched themself into their boyfriend's arms.

"I'm sorry..." He spoke softly into their ear. "I shouldn't have lost control like that...especially in front of you."

MC shook their head within his arms before sniffling.

"It's not you..." They mumbled. "When the crashing started...I-I just...I didn't see you...I didn't see House of Lamentation..."

"What do you mean, Kitten?" He stroked their hair before pulling back to meet their eyes.

"I...I was in my head." They explained. "It reminded me of a time when I was a kid...my dad was drunk and got angry at my little brother. I...didn't see what happened, but I heard curses and crashes and my brother begging him to stop...and I didn't save him. I didn't save him. I hid in the kitchen and sobbed with my arms over my head, begging for him to stop in my mind but not being able move or even speak..."

"Kitten..." Satan hugged them tightly to his chest again. "You're not there; you're here with me and you're safe."

"But my brother--"

"You would have just gotten hurt too." He told them. "You were a child just trying to to survive. It's not your fault."

"But--"

"It's not your fault." He repeated.

This time, the human just closed their eyes and hung their head.

Satan picked them up and carried the human to their room; the...scare, I guess you could call it, had really tired his partner out.

He laid his Kitten on their bed and kissed their forehead.

Satan vowed to never himself lose control in front of them ever again.

Even if this time it had less to do with what he did and more about something they experienced long ago, the wrath demon needed to keep himself in check so he never brought such bad memories to his Kitten's head again.

Beel & Belphie:

The human went on a walk with the twins and, as per usual, Beel made a stop at Madam Screams to get a few dozen pastries.

Beel carried all of the bags of sweets himself and, no matter how often MC saw him carry so much food and never drop any of it, it still amazed the human.

"Dang, that's even more than yesterday..." Belphie commented. "Did you already spend all of your grimm this month?"

"Almost." The gluttony shrugged, still not dropping a single bag.

Suddenly, MC's steps slowed till they were frozen in place.

"-C? MC?" Belphie called to them.

The human slowly raised their gaze up at the men.

"You okay, Muffin?" Beel asked, concern evident on his face.

MC nodded.

"I was remembering one of the fights my parents had when I was a little kid." They explained calmly. "My dad spent over a $1,000 at the bar in a week 'cause he kept buying his friends drinks. Mama told him that he can't keep doing that because they were barely able to put food on the table as things were; Dad yelled at her for telling him what to do and Mom yelled back that she hopes he ends up dead in a ditch somewhere--what?"

The human was genuinely confused by the two demons, who stared at her with a mix of shock and pity.

Belphie shook his head.

"Let's just get home, butthead."

And with that, both twins wrapped an arm around them protectively

Causing Beel to drop two of his bags.

Still, the tallest demon never looked back as he and his brother took their human home, a place where hopefully better memories will come to their mind.

#obey me #obey me otome #obey me lucifer #obey me diavolo #obey me satan #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #TRIGGER WARNING #pleass be careful #⚠️

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zacs-of-rwby · 3 months

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Home is Where Your Light Shines Brightest

Chapter 6: Desperate Measures

Story Summary: Ozpin works tirelessly in his pursuit: to make Beacon of Hope a safe place for kids to grow up. With a bigger location and more kids to take care of, Ozpin starts to feel the weight of responsibility crushing him, and he plans to carry the whole thing himself.

For Qrow, volunteering for Beacon of Hope had only one purpose: to get Summer off his back for a little while. When he meets the polite, friendly, and handsome man in charge, he wonders if he could actually get something out of this whole ordeal after all.

With Qrow’s support, maybe Oz will be able to reach his goal of turning this house into a home.

Story Categories: Mental Health, Recovery, Slice of Life, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Found Family, LGBTQ+ Themes, Alternate Universe, Ozpin’s Halfway House AU, please check Ao3 tags for potentially triggering topics

Chapter Summary: The courts may have mandated Mercury’s stay at Beacon, but they didn’t say he had to like it. There was no point in being hopeful. He would never be able to escape his past. No one’s ever given him a reason to believe he can. Until he meets a certain volunteer.

Chapter Categories: Character introduction, feeling like an outcast, trauma, mentor & mentee, found family

Warnings: Mercury has his canon backstory of murdering his abusive father in this AU. This chapter isn’t graphic or gorey, but it does mention physical child abuse, violence, and murder.

Author’s Note: Mercury is here! Writing for him is super hard because of his backstory and everything, but I really loved writing this chapter! His relationship with Qrow is one of my favorites because it’s so unique to this AU (at least in my own works haha)

#rwby #fan fic #rwby fan fic #mercury black #ozpin #qrow branwen #home is where your light shines brightest #beacon of hope #oz's halfway house au #did i do this write?

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jamneuromain · 1 year

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Wishful Thinking Chpt. 2

Andy Barber x You (Reader), no use of Y/N

Alternate Universe - College AU

Summary: A new semester. A new task. A new boyfriend, your previous professor, Andy Barber. Everything seems to be going on the right track. So why didn't it?

Warning: Detailed description of reaction after non-con oral sex, discussion of sex and BDSM relationship, rejected aftercare, inappropriate teacher-student relationship, power imbalance, obsessive behavior, age difference, cheating, slight violence, explicit language, discussion about divorce, TW: BDSM/safe wording

A/N: This fic has some disturbing themes, and discusses potentially upsetting topics. Please read through the warning before engaging with the fic. As I have said, the fic has mentioned a number of (potentially) triggering and heavy topics, you don't have to engage further if you feel uncomfortable about one or more topics.

Wishful Thinking M. List Dancing in the Daydream M. list

“Baby, you with me?” Andy panics as your body goes limp and slides onto the floor. You can barely support yourself on the cold hard floor, hand bracing the ground.

Coughing.

White splatter of cum mixed with your saliva on the ground.

You start to hurl at the end of every outburst of your throat. Your stomach lurching. Turning. Dangerously close to throwing up.

It’s your body acting up, while you have zero control over it.

The feeling of your tongue still being pressed. The pain in your throat, as blood flushes it every time you cough. The urge to breathe.

“I’m sorry, baby, stay with me.” He rushes to the kitchen to fill a glass of water and grabs some Kleenex before handing them to you, sitting on the floor too, “here, have some water.”

You didn’t take the water. Your arms sore. It’s a miracle that you are still able to sit up instead of lying on the floor altogether. Your scalp hurts. There are definitely hair tugged off. You are still crying, but it’s purely a biological side effect of your turning your guts out. Your gaze on the ground. But you are not looking at anything, still processing what had just happened. The floor messy. Your dress messy. You, messy too.

A string of saliva still lingers on your lips, yet you make no move to wipe it off your face.

Andy brings a tissue to your face, slowly cleaning your chin.

“Breathe, sweetheart,” he whispers, soaking one tissue with your mess, quickly replacing it with a clean one, “are you feeling alright?”

You look like a lifeless doll, only the faint rise and fall from your chest indicates that you are still alive. Your eyes not focusing. You not moving.

“Sweetheart, talk to me, please.” He pleads, reaching your bare shoulder.

You flinch.

He couldn’t believe his eyes, but you flinch.

You shiver away from his touch.

You hug your knees, crouching into a ball.

“Tell me what’s wrong, baby. Talk to me.” He begs, his hand frozen mid-air, wanting to touch you, comfort you.

You don’t know what to say. Even if you do, you don’t know where to start.

His roughness? You used to like it. Why not today?

His words? You feel uncomfortable, sure, but why did you safeword?

Your throat hurts, your arm hurts, your stomach still feels funny. You’ve made a mess. On yourself, on his floor, on your dress.

Embarrassment and regret fill your mind, along with you questioning yourself are you truly into this BDSM relationship.

And you are scared.

Scared of him acting out like that again. Scared if he doesn’t want to have sex with you. Scared that he would want to have sex with you, and lose control. Scared that his words are mean, vile, even.

Scared of his touch. Scared he will leave more bruises. Scared of his attempt to communicate. Scared you will break down again.

“It’s cold here, could I carry you to our bed?” He asks softly, “or a blanket? You could catch a cold.”

No response.

“Baby, please. Look at me.”

Soft sniffs and hiccups come from your curled-up form. Your body shaking. Trembling. Crying.

“Sweetheart,” his hand falls on the floor, he respects your wish, not touching you. There’s pain in his voice. “Talk to me. Talk to me, please.”

You don’t want to talk. You don’t want to hear his voice. The hurt inflicted by his previous words seems to linger. You bury your head deeper.

Sobbing. Crying.

Until your eyes run dry and your arms hug yourself so tight they are numb.

Until your lips taste salty because of your own tears.

Until the sobs fade.

“Baby, please.” He repeats, his voice broken, small, “please.”

You don’t want to see him.

Don’t want to hear him.

Don’t want anything to do with him.

You slowly move your numbing arm aside, your eyes on the floor, not looking at him.

“Sweetheart - ”

“I’m going home.” You mutter. The sting of blood flow recurring in your arm running up and down. Painful, but bearable.

Andy is stunned for a second. “Home?” He blinks, uncertain of what he just heard.

“I’m going home.” You repeat, louder this time.

Andy shakes his head slightly, trying to think of solutions, “okay. I’ll drive you.”

“I’ll get an Uber.” You are not looking at him, slowly standing up.

“It’s late - ”

“I’ll get an Uber.” You repeat once more, lifting your feet almost mechanically, heading towards the door.

Andy scrambles from the floor, keeping some distance, but following you, “please, let me drive you home.” He softly begs, “it’s late, and I want to know you could get home safe.”

“I’ll get an Uber.” As if this is the answer to every question or request he has, you pull the door open, saying the exact same words.

Andy sighs. He hates to see you like this. He hates himself for making you like this. “Would you text me when you get home safe?”

You shut your mouth.

You are not sure whether you want to text him.

“It takes at least five minutes for an Uber to be here. It’s windy outside.” He tries, “you can stay inside for a bit. Stay warm.”

His hands and arms itching to hug you. To soothe you. To comfort you. To ease you the pain he brings.

His chest hurting.

He misses the warmth of you tucked under his head.

He misses the way your curves match. He misses the way he hugs you a little tighter, and feels you on his body.

Now it’s empty. There’s no you between his arms and his torso.

“Baby, please. Text me when you get home, okay?” As the uber pulls up in front of his house.

You avoid his gaze, and get into that uber.

Andy watches you as the uber drives into the night. He watches until the car takes a turn and disappears from his sight. He stands there, as if this would bring you back. As if this would undo the past hour.

Andy spends the next hour cleaning the floor. Wiping the mess on the floor away. Cleaning it with detergent. He knows better than to sit or half kneel on the floor to do chores. Let alone he has yet to shrug off his dress pants. But he just keeps cleaning. Until the spot of the floor you knelt on looks no different from the rest of the apartment.

The whiff of lemon makes it different.

He feels cold creeping into his bones.

He doesn’t like the whiff of lemon. It reminds him of his old place. The place he had called home for over ten years.

It reminds him of Laurie.

However, he took this bottle of detergent when he was shopping for his apartment.

A habit. Buying the same type and smell of detergent for the past ten years.

He wasn’t even looking. In fact, he barely used it after he moved to his apartment.

And here he is, staring at the bottle of detergent he doesn’t even like.

The whiff of lemon is the last straw.

Andy slams the bottle on the coffee table, rips a garbage bag from the large roll, and puts the bottle, the Kleenex, his old mug – the one Laurie bought him during one of their anniversaries, stuff that reminds him of Laurie in the garbage bag.

He’s getting rid of Laurie. Every trace of her.

He is about to take the trash out when his phone buzzes.

“What do you want, Laurie?” He snaps at the phone.

“What do you want, Laurie? Calling me about two dozen times? What do you want?” Andy stands by the kitchen counter of his old place, his house, looking at the dark-haired woman he used to call his wife.

Laurie is shivering, either because of the cold or the pressure from him. He doesn’t blame her. He simply doesn’t want to see her.

She ignores his question, flipping two pills from her trembling palm and swallowing them down with a gulp of water. She drains the glass, still not looking at him.

“Laurie-”

“I tried your office earlier. You weren’t there.” She turns her head, staring at him, coldness laces her voice, “you are cheating, aren’t you?” Laurie is on the verge of tears, “you are cheating behind my back.”

Andy exhales out of frustration. He shakes his head, “this is not about you. Nor about me, Laurie. Now sign the damn papers so we can get it over with.”

“What papers?”

Andy crosses his arms. He can’t believe they are having this conversation again. “The divorce papers, Laurie.”

She gasps, “I’m not divorcing you! Please, Andy, there’s gotta be some way we can fix this.”

And there it goes.

Again.

Every time he brings up the divorce papers, she’s pretending there are no divorce papers. As if this could delay the process of their divorce.

Every fucking damn time.

“Laurie, we’ve negotiated the house, the possessions, even the damn lake cabin. You can get almost everything plus this house. All I’m asking is the lake cabin, my personal possessions, and my car. What else do you want, huh? Kick me out of my place is not enough for you?” Andy snaps, slamming his fist on the counter. He is beyond angry. He is furious.

True. He put the idea of a divorce on the table first.

He lawyered up first.

He was the one who handed her the papers.

But still.

She agreed. To all of his terms.

Why would she back out now?

And today with you didn’t help either.

He is mad at himself for hurting you. Hurt you during sex. When you would flinch at his touch.

Laurie just became the target of his pent-up anger.

“Why?” She screams, “why are you leaving me?”

“Because you cheated! YOU! CHEATED!” He shouts.

Laurie’s hair is messy after the small outbreak. She stares at him. Her blue cardigan crumpled and wrinkled. She breathes heavily, her shoulders rising and falling.

Terrible silence swarms over them. Engulfing their home with darkness and cold.

And distance.

They used to talk about everything and anything. Andy would talk about his work at the university. Laurie would talk about hers at Children’s Cottage. Laurie would joke about his poor taste in movies – “black and white films? What’s the fun in that” – and insist they watch something else. Laurie would welcome him home with a kiss on his cheek and happiness glittering in her eyes.

Since when did they become so distant?

Since when did Laurie come home late and say she was working?

Since when did they stop confiding in each other?

Andy thought about whether he has done this right, over and over again. To be the first quitter in marriage? Is that what he is? A failed husband, who is so ignorant of his own wife, that she went out cheating?

Or maybe he’s wrong from the start.

Maybe they shouldn’t get married for the sole reason of she was pregnant.

Maybe they shouldn’t get married so early, right after college.

But all of this is futile. What’s done is done.

He couldn’t undo everything. Or unmeet you.

In fact, there’s a little piece of him at the bottom of his heart, telling him all that he experienced has led him to you.

But it doesn’t matter. Nothing matters. He just needs her to sign the papers.

Andy sighs.

“Look, I don’t want to go to court. I don’t want to make your cheating go public. Sign the papers and tell your lawyers to give them to my lawyers. Or I’ll meet you in court.” He says slowly, looking her in the eyes. “I hate to make this ugly, Laurie. I loved you. But it’s time to move on.”

Laurie stands there, staring right back. She could be misunderstood as a puppet if it were not for the slight shift of her center.

“Goodbye, Laurie.” He turns his back towards her, heading out the place he used to call home.

His place is more of a home. With you. He wants a future with you, even if you are not quite reaching the marriage part yet. But he wants it. He wants you.

The muffled cry of “Andy” is distorted in the wind. As he slams his car door shut with a bit more force than necessary.

It’s either papers or court. And he asked his lawyer – Neil - his frat buddy from college.

It’s going to be a divorce either way.

Taglist: @geminiflanagansblog @wintasssoldier

#andy barber #andy barber smut #andy barber fluff #andy barber angst #andy barber x you #andy barber x reader #andy barber x female reader #defending jacob #andy barber fanfiction #professor!andy barber #student reader #dancing in the daydream #wishful thinking

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cereal-abyss-mage · 7 months

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for anyone who hadn't done wriothesley's story quest, please be careful, it deals with topics that can potentially be triggering to some people such as cults, gaslighting, abuse and torture (especially psychological torture). there are also mentions of starvation (though this one is in a note that is optional to read) and human trafficking

these topics are portrayed unusually graphically for genshin, so please stay safe!!

#genshin impact #wriothesley #please do tell if I missed any or if any of the ones I mentioned are used incorrectly I tried my best but I'm not an expert or anything

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alterhumansafespace · 5 days

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Hello there! This is the Alterhuman Safe Space account. I’m here to answer whatever questions I can and support those who need a shoulder to cry on. Currently this account is only ran by one person so I may not be able to full understand some experiences, but I won’t turn anyone away because of it.

I hope to post asks, and teach the terminology of the community, teach others about the community, and provide a safe space for those who don’t fit in the social norms. That is the primary goal of this account.

This account will block those who’re unacceptably hateful and rude. This is for main account runner and any potential other runners of the account’s safety and mental health. Hate speech against people of color, the LGBTQ+, alterhumans, furries, and others are considered unacceptable under any circumstances.

This is a 13+ safe blog, though there may be some swearing depending on which runner is speaking.

Rules for Asks:

1. Respect the account and whoever runs it as those who run it are still living beings. If you don’t like something, feel free to block or not interact.

2. Don’t put your name in the ask box. This is to protect yourself. This does mean you can ask anonymously if it feels more comfortable for you.

3. This account will understand constructive criticism and will fix any mistakes on the blog. Either by doing an update post, or by reblogging the new information.

4. If you have a request, feel free to DM this account instead of sending an ask. This can include identities, shift types, or other topics like sexualities. Just remember this is primarily a blog for alterhumans in the end and our primary content will be for those of that demographic.

5. Please don’t flirt with anyone on this account. It’s not cute or funny and will be considered as harassment if it’s continuous. You get a single warning before you’re put on a do not answer list.

6. Don’t be afraid to tell the blog your own experiences and alterhuman identities! We are accepting of pretty much any and all identities (Unless it’s genuinely harmful to others).

7. Please read the account runners’ introductions as they will give you a name, pronouns, and emoji tag to refer to them in asks and pms. It will also let you know what identities are on and off the table to ask about. This does include nonhuman identities, but again, try to stay on the alterhuman topic.

Main Account Runner:

My name is Saiph (pronounced as Safe) and I’m 21 years old. I use He/They pronouns.

I’ve been awakened for around a year, but possibly awakened longer than that without knowledge of the therian/otherkin community for about 2-3. I identify primarily as otherkin for simplicity, but I’m also fictionkin, copingkin and trying to figure out if my copinglink is more of a kith/hearttype.

Other things to note are that I have ADHD and autism with my special interests being dnd, dragons, stars, deities, and mythology. My hobbies include drawing, crocheting, reading, writing and music.

I’m one person who will swear on this account.

Any of my non-alterhuman identities are on the table to ask about. But pushing into traumas that may be identified with them are not at all ok to ask about.

You’re free to ask me details about any and all of my alterhuman identities.

My identities not related to alterhumanity:

White, Trans Man, Demiboy, Omniromantic, Demiaroace, Androsexual, Ambiamorous, Furry, beginner witch

My alterhuman Identities specifically being:

Otherkin- I’m dragonkin. I tend to equate it primarily with western dragons despite my kintype also having fur. The scales are dark, but look as if they captured the night sky within them. It’s eyes are a cool silver color with black sclerae the horns capturing nebulae.

Shifts~ Mental shifts, emotional shifts, perception shifts, phantom shifts, astral shifts, aura shifts, bi-locational shifts, spiritual shifts

No currently known shift triggers or grounding methods. I tend to push through the negative shifts with this and remind myself that I am physically a human.

Fictionkin- I am a fictionkin of Julian Devorak from the game “The Arcana A Mystic Romance”. This is my oldest known alterhuman identity.

Shifts~ Emotional shifts, mental shifts, minor phantom shifts (mostly clothing/figure/hair when it’s a good shift. Negative shifts include me looking like his reversed form, or taking on aspects of it)

One shift trigger happens if I let my hair grow out or I dye my hair auburn. Though those cause positive shifts. Negative shift triggers aren’t fully known yet as it’s normally too late when I am trying to figure it out. No known grounding for the negative shifts as my emotions are way too high and may need to sleep the feelings off.

Copingkin- This one was figured out very recently, but I’m a Fenrirkin. This is one of my less shifty alterhuman identities, but when I do they’re not all that pleasant.

Shifts~ Minor phantom shifts, emotional shifts, bi-locational shifts, perception shifts, to be further figured out

Normally the shift triggers happen when I’m in a heightened emotional state, so normally I almost always have an emotional shift up. My perception of reality gets kinda messed up as my coping kin basically embodies the emotions of betrayal and suspicion of authority/humans. I do get minor phantom shifts of chains whenever I wear a choker. The worst of these shifts include me wanting to bite into my hand, primarily the right hand, as hard as I can. There are no known full on grounding methods. I believe talking out my emotions is the only way known right now to ground myself. Either that, or give into the need to bite into my hand as hard as I can.

⚠️This identity for me is primarily a negative experience during shifts. As much as it might sound cool to have a copingkin of Fenrir, for me it’s not exactly sunshine and rainbows most of the time.⚠️

Copinglink- Anatolian Shepherd/Saint Bernard mix is my copinglink. I’m trying to figure out if this is a kith/hearttype as I ado feel a familial bond with the two breeds

Shifts~ Minor phantom shifts, mental shifts, sensory shifts, perception shifts

I originally linked onto and started identifying as a generalized overview of medium and large sized dogs due to a pretty nasty breakup. My loving style is that of a dog and so are my behaviors when I’m hurt but I’m not feeling like turning it on myself. It was an identity to cope with everything going on at the time. As of the current moment it may be copingkith as I don’t identify myself with either breed, but I can feel the connection of what they were bred to do and the overall mannerisms of dogs shift triggers normally happen when I’m feeling like I’m in survival mode. There’s no grounding needed as eventually it goes away and isn’t detrimental to my physical health.

Questioning- Raven and/or crow kith/hearttype

Shifts~ None, I just have a very familial connection with them. So no shift triggers or grounding for shifts of these creatures

Sign of tag> 🐉

#alterhuman #otherkin #copinglink #copingkin #fictionkin #questioning theriotype #alterhumanity #intro post #SaiphTheOtherkin #send asks #ask blog

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kalidoscope05 · 11 months

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Hey, i am currently experiencing 3am random thoughts so I’m going to dump on wir them here.

This does discuss some topics involving smoking, a mentioned surgery, an overworked mother and fear. If there is any other things in here that is triggering to any one please message me and let me know other than that please read if you are able to thank you and stay safe.

With the my current at home life things are a bit strange. My Dad ,with his recent leg surgery and not being able to come home for weeks, is currently staying up a my grandparents due to their home being more… spacious, i guess. That’s not important though but something that is import, especially context wise to the thought/ ideas I’ve had, is that my mom is the only on who works but she doesn’t only work a lot she is going through nursing school. So my point is my momma is a very tired women which goes with out saying she struggles to get any sleep so she sometimes struggles to get up when she does get some but my though come from this one night i had to wake her and it was a moment of my life i don’t think I can forget.

It was a Wednesday night, i had just got back with my grandmother from church. It was about thirty mins before my mom need to be awake so I just went out back and smoked a bit with my dad and grandmother. It wasn’t until about five or seven minutes before she needed be awake when dad said something about needing to wake her and I was like, “ Don’t worry about I’ll take care of it after I go in get me something to drink,” I still relatively a new smoker as in it still bothers my throat and lungs sometimes not important though. After getting my drink and maybe a snack i sat it done where I was sitting the living room and went to wake up mom.

From the time I have spent on the internet no one really talks about how terrifying it is to wake up your parents even at an older age. It make you feel like your doing something wrong and that’s how felt as slow approached her. At the time the only thing I remember feeling and seeing is fear. And it wasn’t like i fear for my life, it was more of a “ i don’t know what’s happening, i don’t want to fuck up i don’t know what I’m doing “ kind of fear. Due to that unknown and that fear I kinda hesitated before I even touched her or said anything. But I eventually just said whatever and woke her up. I went en gentle and just said quiet but loud enough she understood, “ hey its about a 8:30”.. cause that’s when she usually got up but um even with how gentle I was I still scared her. She jumped back real hard which not only scared her but scared me. And I think the thing that got me and what makes this a memory that will stick to me is that… fear in her eyes as she looked at me. Seeing the kinda fear in her eyes that I saw… i got to admit it hurt like hell. I never would have though that wake my own mother would led me to experience something I never want it experience again.

But that is just along winded telling of the idea I had after this experience i guess. It had me think of what remains of Edith finch, A glorious game with a fantastic but intriguing story. I want take different story’s of my childhood and my siblings and cousins, aunt, uncles etc. and turn them into a game similar to that game. Do you know what i mean, like take the way the story of Edith finch and how it was told but turn it into one about my family, u know?

Idk this just one long rant/ talk about a potential game i could work on i guess. Idk. If anyone sees this and has any thoughts of their own they would like to add just reblog with them or send them in to me anyway you can I guess. Idk i just wanted this off my mind and in a write form.

#edith finch #what remains of edith finch #3am thoughts #services no purpose #I’m sorry if poorly written I tried #game concept #game maker

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amurder-ofcrows · 1 year

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I recently got diagnoses with schizoaffective disorder. Do you have any tips?

i have a few!

know your patterns. while psychotic episodes can come on randomly, there are often patterns you notice that tend to be triggers. for me, it get worse when i’m not sleeping well and when the seasons change and it gets darker earlier. i also notice my hypomania is acting up when i don’t sleep as much as well. this will take some getting used to, but if you can spot the patterns you can know when to be more careful and potentially get more help when you need it

on the topic of sleep, sleep disturbances are REALLY common in people with schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder. there have been studies that show that up to 80% of us have some form of regular sleep disturbances. and studies ALSO show that lack of sleep worsens psychosis (which is why even people not on the schizophrenia spectrum or don’t have a psychotic disorder can start hallucinating when sleep deprived). keeping a regular sleep schedule is one of my biggest tips. and know your own body for this. i need about 9 hours every night, but i know people who need more and people who need less. the whole “8 hours a night” is an average or a baseline to start out with. find your rhythm and adjust accordingly

mood trackers!! i have a mood tracker on my phone made for people with bipolar (since i have the bipolar type of schizoaffective disorder) and some days i’m like wow why do i feel so bad today and then i look at my app and im like oh i’m just in the usual downturn of my mood cycle, i should be kind to myself so i don’t prolong it. it also helps me prepare for mood shifts that are coming up just based on my past rhythm so i know when i should be doing certain self care treatments, such as doing grounding meditations to help my hypomania or making sure i get out of my bed when im depressed

antipsychotics are finicky. i’ve been on 8 different meds and even more combinations of those meds before i found what works for me. it will probably take some time for you to find what works for you

also antipsychotics tend to have noticeable side affects. some make you incredibly tired, some cause restlessness, most cause some kind of weight gain, and so on. i don’t say this to scare you because even with the side affects, i have had so much relief from my symptoms once i was on the right combination. i just want you to be prepared because some symptoms can be a deal breaker for staying on meds. i was on one that made me so restless that even though i was getting relief from my psychosis, especially my paranoia and delusions, i had to change the medication because i didn’t feel comfortable in my body. the medicine i’m on now has certain side affects that i know other people would find as a deal breaker, but it works for me. it’s all about balance

as for mood stabilizers and antidepressants, i found those easier to adjust to and i didn’t have as many side affects. though i know people who had an easier time in the reverse of this. i personally am on a mood stabilizer and an SSRI for my moods, and one of my antipsychotics is also classified as a mood stabilizer. a lot of antipsychotics are also used at a lower dose as mood stabilizers, but not all mood stabilizers are antipsychotics and not all antipsychotics are mood stabilizers. they just happen to overlap in some cases and it’s good to be aware of that for getting the proper dosages for what you want to treat

block triggers. i’m serious. i didn’t do this for a while because i was like i’m tough enough i can handle this but honestly? it wasn’t worth it. tags like “unreality” or other specific media that triggers you should be on your blocked tag list. you don’t need to prove yourself to anyone. keep yourself safe!

find outlets that stimulate you and help you focus. i find that once i’m immersed in something, i don’t notice my surroundings as much. i like drawing while listening to podcasts because it doesn’t allow my brain to spiral because i’m focused on something else. you may prefer to read, or write, or have a comfort show, or exercise, or WHATEVER. just finding an outlet that lets you let go for a bit really helps break up days when symptoms are worse

allow yourself to cope in the way you need to. i feel like some people don’t like when people act “weird” to calm themselves down. like i can’t just turn off my paranoia and just telling myself everything is fine just isn’t enough. i will have my parents walk through the entire house with me to check for intruders. i close my blinds in the middle of the day. i put stickers on what i think are cameras. i’ve worked on lessening these actions through therapy, but when i’m in the moment, it’s more important for me to calm down than it is for me to act “normal”. also stim toys are great for when i’m really paranoid while trying to fall asleep because i don’t need to turn a light on to use them, i can just focus on the feeling in my hand and allow myself to get sleepier

i hope these help! and if you have more questions, my ask is open and i also respond to direct messages if you want a more in depth conversation. good luck with your new diagnosis, i hope this helps in some way!

#unreality tw #unreality mention #schizoaffective disorder

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memies · 2 years

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BLOODBORNE SENTENCE STARTER - Feel free to change pronouns e.t.c.

Warning for potentially triggering topics!

“Are you cold?”

“Alive and well, are ya?”

“Ah, my first visitor in a year!”

“Oh, hello there. Perfect timing.”

“Stay away… stay away from me…”

“How magnificently the flame burns.”

“I tell you, I will not forget our adage.”

“Oh, dear me… have I offended you?”

“Please, could you do something for me?”

“Didn't you see the warning? Turn back at once.”

“I'm not entirely useless… I can still do my share.”

“Time is a cruel, cruel thing. Haven't you noticed?”

“Hmph. Liar. Such pettiness will be your undoing.”

“As for us, the time has come to honour our vows.”

“What, looking to free me? Then I graciously accept.”

“Is that you, *Name here*? No, you're someone else.”

“She's safe with me now. I presume you're to thank?”

“We shall not give audience to an ill-mannered beast.”

“Oh, I know very well how the secrets beckon so sweetly.”

“I'd like to tender my thanks, but I haven't much to offer...“

“This may sound strange, but… have I somehow changed?”

“You are a peculiar one. You’ve nothing to gain by speaking with me.”

“Again and again, it never ends. Please, I need you to do something.”

“You are kind to me. You are… a friend. I will help you however I can.”

“Oh-hoh! Good to see you safe. Now, let's think up something to discuss. Just tell me what piques your interest.”

“Ahh, remain wary of the frailty of men. Their wills are weak, minds young. Were it not for fear, death would go unlamented.”

“I am undead. There is nothing you can do to hurt me. They failed, and so will you.”

“Oh, don't you worry. Whatever happens… you may think it all a mere bad dream… “

“Is someone there? Well, whoever you are, it matters not. I will not die, tarnished as I am. You came here for naught. Be off with you.”

“I know what you did to them… It's not your fault. The nightmare held them, and now they are free. But, what about you? Have you profited at all?”

“This town is cursed. Whatever your reasons might be, you should plan a swift exit. Whatever can be gained from this place, it will do more harm than good.”

#meme #rp meme #starter #starters #rp starter #rp starters #sentence starters #sentence starter #sentence meme #sentence prompt #sentence memes #sentence prompts #rp sentence prompt #rp sentence starters #bloodborne

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novieight · 1 year

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"Blushing faces covered in pink! Rushing bombs, exploding ink!"

"Faces blush, a rush of ink! Bombs explode, no time to think!"

hi everyone!! im finally making a masterpost or intro post whatever you call it!!! so first im gonna tell about myself i guess lmao im so awkward ANYWAYS-

my name is Novan!!! im a genderfluid transmasc lesbian!!

im a MINOR!!!!!!!!!!

i go by he/they pronouns

i have a splatoon hyperfixation as well as sky: cotl, disney twisted wonderland, toilet bound hanako kun, and kid icarus!!!! talk to me about any of them!!!

im an age regressor and also part of the tk community ^///^

go follow my friend @4low3r!!!!!!! theyre super fuckin cool and their writing is really good!!!

now for some basic dni, triggers, etc.

dni if proship, prolife, anti-anti, etc. basic dni stuff

dni if homophobic, transphobic, racist, etc.

most find this strange but if you openly post about in depth religion PLEASE I AM BEGGING YOU DNI!!!!! it triggers my derealization :(

i get triggered by mentions of manipulation, su!c!de, threatening one's life, etc. so please be careful with those topics around me!!

i have trypanophobia so needles and excessive blood (irl, art stuff is fine) really scares me

please dont reality check me as it really upsets me

saying this again please DNI IF YOU ARE A RELIGIOUS ACCOUNT!!!! DO NOT TRY TO "CONVERT" OR "MAKE ME REPENT" I WILL INSTANTLY BLOCK AND REPORT YOU!!!!

ummmmm what else do i put here OH I GUESS A BYF LIST IS GOOD I DONT KNOW IM TRYING TO TAKE UP SPACE HERE

i spam post like A LOT; im the type to reblog LOADS of art and fics and stuff, so if you dont like when users clutter your dash beware of me i guess lol

if you couldnt tell i get really awkward about some subjects so just i dont know just thought i should say that

i DO reblog tk content so if you dont want to see that then you probably shouldnt follow me

i also have these random thoughts and rants and stuff and yeah i can act really different at times sooooo uh yeah

i am an undiagnosed autistic; i still live with my abusers because im not old enough to live on my own BUT as soon as i can get safely tested for autism i will see about a real diagnosis

i do vent on here sometimes so if you dont want to see me talking about potentially triggering topics i would block the tag "novasvents" because i always tag my vent posts with that

i should also mention that i am part of the selfship community!! i self ship with frye and riddle rosehearts as well as a few others!!

now how about a list of the characters that i am!! (bolded = more frequent!!)

callie cuttlefish (splatoon)

hypno!callie (splatoon)

aloha (coroika)

frye (splatoon)

mei shijima (toilet bound hanako kun)

emma 63194 (the promised neverland)

lilia vanrouge (disney twisted wonderland, diasomnia)

basil (omori)

mitsuba sousuke (toilet bound hanako kun)

miko villager (bad end night by hitoshizuku x yama)

viridi (kid icarus: uprising)

ENA (Joel G)

anddddd thats about all i can think of!! stay fresh!!

#novasspeaks #holy shit i finally made it #JEEZ THIS TOOK SO LONG WHAT THE FUCK #i really like it though #and i love how i themed my blog as Hypno <3 #let the hyperfixation COMMENCE #AGAIN

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