#the unfairness of it all is Bugging me and it's making it hard for me to be fully excited for the end the way I've been with shows before
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See, it's less about whether or not Willow is the braincell, and more about the fact that Willow likes taking care of her friends and looking out for them. It's both a source of self esteem and worth for her (she feels useful and competent if she's helping others) AND it's her main way of expressing her gratitude and affection for her friends presence in her life. They make her happy so she's gonna keep them safe and out of harms way. Plus most of her friends (sans hunter) have a history of looking out for her that, as much as she appreciates, she'd rather not return to. She likes her independence and she likes her new role in the friend group, she doesn't want to take steps back.
Sometimes this Need To Help manifests as magical outbursts that may not be great strategic moves (when she thinks Hunters been kidnapped in coth). Sometimes it manifests as scolding and steering in the right direction (her with Gus in something ventured) but ultimately letting them make their own choices. Ultimately Willows the sort of person to do whatever she thinks is right in the given situation for the people around her. When she can summon it, she has a lot of wisdom for her age (seen in the scene w/ her getting everyone to share food on the airship in king's tide). And if she can't summon it, she'll still try and do whatever seems right in the moment (gives hunter the pic of flapjack) and just problem solve as the day goes on until someone feels better, goddamit! <- this is the kinda moment that leads to rash decisions, bottling her feelings and burning out bc she really doesn't wanna fail due to her history and self esteem issues. It's why Hunter comforting her works so well in ftf and completely shifts their dynamic. She finally has confirmation that someone who loves her won't love her any less when she fucks up, but I digress.
Willows always looking out for others, and sometimes she's dumb about it, sometimes she's smart about it! It depends on who she's helping, why they need help and what kind of day she's had/where she is. Thanks to Them showed Willow in a pretty stable situation, hence there's extra room for silliness. For the future was following extremely distressing events and put even more stresses on Willow herself. Hence she bottles things up and struggles to make the good decisions she was once able to. It's not like she became a worse leader or friend since asias or king's tide (episodes that take time to include small moments of her playing to people's strengths, doing good strategy, making sure no one's left behind, etc). She's just having a really garbage fucking day.
She's probably only gonna get 1 Moment™ or so in the finale bc she had her day in ftf and I'm content with that, but I was rewatching asias where she DOES take on a responsible leadership role (while still maintaining her whole "blossoming wallflower/crouching underdog hidden badass" thing) and it reminded me of the small contained debate that happened around thanks to thems airing. Because yes, Willow and Gus were Goofy™ that ep, but a) they were literally comic relief in season 1 + 2A, it kinda has precedent and b) Willow is only as sensible as the situation calls for her and as her environment allows. She's nuanced like that!
#the owl house#toh#ramblings of a lunatic#willow park#this doesn't necessarily feel like anything that hasn't been said before but like. idc man it's a free market and i love willow#I'm still really sad abt the finale but i finally got time to draw today and I'm feeling A Little Better#still can't get over how sad i am that the show isn't fully getting to end on it's own terms and there's no promise of continuation#despite the obvious fan demand and like.#the hope that we were given with that interview that said the yt releases made execs realize how popular the show was#even the watching and dreaming trailer has a TON of views on the youtube page for disney channel#ftf is currently at 6 MILLION views and reached that number in less time than it took for thanks to them to his 5.8 million#i just#the unfairness of it all is Bugging me and it's making it hard for me to be fully excited for the end the way I've been with shows before#I'm really hoping for spin-off comics- even though i know there'd probably be AT LEAST a year between the show ending and the comics#if they ever happened#that's just how these things work and dana desperately needs a break#but still. it'd keep me going to a certain extent#AUGHhhhh i hate u modern state of television and animation i hate you cannibalistic entertainment industry i hate u disney corporation#anyway. i love asias i need to stop watching it so much
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For the smut blurb, possibly a tickle fight turns....more? (Feel free to ignore, I am feeling like a beached whale so sexy thoughts are not my friend)
thank you for requesting!🫶🏽
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“Give it back!”
“No!”
“Jack—”
“I’m your boyfriend, you need to give me attention!”
You opened your mouth, something between a snort and a laugh ready to leave your lips as you reached for your book, only for a shriek to escape your lips when you felt his fingers digging into your side. You looked up, seeing something mischievous gleaming in his eyes before his fingers slipped under the hem of your shirt and began tickling your endlessly.
“Stop!”
“Not until you say I’m better than your book!”
“That’s unfair!”
“I’m your boyfriend!”
“It’s a really good book!”
But Jack was relentless as he pinned you down with his thighs, a massive grin on his face as he continued to tickle you. Your book was long forgotten, abandoned somewhere on the floor (with your page marked, because he was a gentleman like that) and the reason he had been bugging you in the first place was no longer a priority.
You squirmed beneath him, trying to break free from his hold and trying to push his hands away but it only made Jack laugh harder. You let out a whine mixed between your shrieks, glaring up at your boyfriend.
He paused, looking down at you with a smile. “Ready to surrender?”
“Are you?” You retorted, just because you could. Just because it made you feel a little better about the fact he had you pinned and exactly where he wanted you.
His eyes shone in amusement. “I don’t think you’re in the place to start making demands, baby.”
And you were about to reply, about to throw something snarky right back at him when you wiggled your hips a little and felt it. Or, for lack of better explanation, felt him.
Jack let out a little choked noise, almost inaudible if it weren’t for the fact he was pressed on top of you and you could feel his hard dick pressed against your hips.
Your eyes snapped back up to his face, admiring the way his cheeks flushed in response. “Someone’s a little excited.”
“It’s not my fault,” he argued back, his blush deepening as he tried to shift away but you pushed your hips upwards again, pressing right against him. “Shit.”
Before Jack could even process what was happening, you quickly shoved him over until he was on his back and you were on top. You knew he let you, that he went willingly but there was still something quite victorious in the feeling as your thighs straddled him.
“This is what you wanted, hm? My attention on you,” you teased and a shameless moan left Jack’s lips when you began to rock your hips. “Just needed some help with your little problem.”
“Not little,” he gritted out between clenched teeth, but he was practically a puddle underneath you as you continued to grind your hips against the obvious bulge in his sweatpants. “Can give you a reminder if you need it.”
“No, I like you like this,” you confessed as your head dipped down, your lips pressing sloppy, open-mouthed kisses along the column of his neck as he squirmed beneath you. “So fucking desperate with the noises you make. Fucking love it.”
“Yeah?” It was breathy and a little high-pitched.
“Yeah, baby,” you murmured, kissing a spot just below his ear that had his hips bucking up. “Think about them all the time when you’re gone.”
His eyes clenched shut. “Shit.”
“When I miss you.”
“Shit, shit shit.”
“When I touch myself—”
His arms wound around your waist, keeping you locked against him as he helplessly rutted his hips against yours until he finally came. He let out a small whimper, a noise from the back of his throat as you shifted a little on top of him until you could reach your hand over to cup his cheek.
“I can’t believe you made me come in my pants like a fucking teenager,” he breathed out, though he didn’t sound too upset on the matter as he slowly blinked his eyes open to look at you.
“I was just giving you my attention,” you grinned down at the boy, happily accepting the kiss he pressed against your lips before he rolled you over.
Jack grinned back. “Got anymore to give?”
You raised your brows in surprise. “Already ready to go again, Hughes?”
“Thought I might repay the favour first,” Jack retorted, his fingers already curling the waistband of your leggings to pull them down your legs.
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#jack hughes#nhl#new jersey devils#jack hughes x reader#jack hughes x you#jack hughes x y/n#jack hughes fic#jack hughes one shot#jack hughes smut#nhl x reader#nhl x you#nhl x y/n#nhl fic#nhl one shot#nhl smut
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🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱🐱
aita for suggesting to my mom that she may need to rehome some of her cats?
my mom has seven cats. she loves them all to bits and she paid thousands of dollars for them. (collectively, not each.) empty nest syndrome hit her hard when i moved out and she filled the house with cats a few years back. her and my stepdad were managing it really well up until a couple of years ago when my stepdad’s cancer came back. it is terminal, and he’s exhausted all the time, so they’ve started free feeding their cats. they have a couple massive bowls in the house just full of food. all of their cats maintain a pretty healthy weight, except one. their oldest cat is incredibly obese. like, the “how is that cat even moving” type of obese. he gets these coughing fits multiple times per day that sound like he’s choking, and he struggles to walk around, especially because he’s declawed (reminder, this cat is Old, and my mom did not know about the negative effects of declawing when he was a kitten) so i know his feet must hurt all the time. he still jumps around but he’s slow.
now i’ve tried to have the “please take him to the vet” conversation several times. the coughing fits worry me and maybe she will take a vet’s word about a diet more seriously. but it’s always shut down because my stepdad won’t allow it. he has something against spending lots of money on pets. especially cats (i don’t know why) and i know he talks her out of it if she even mentions it. and of course she can’t do it without running it by him. so i’ve said okay, please at least put him on a diet. she says they can’t do that, ben’s too tired and mom’s working a ton because he can’t, so they have to free feed. i suggest maybe considering rehoming some of them.
well that’s the end of the world. i can’t suggest that. in fact, it’s brought up in front of the ENTIRE REST OF THE FAMILY the next day for me to be laughed at for even having the idea. and they did laugh. i know it’s absolutely last resort to ever think about rehoming an animal, but if you’re literally unable to take care of them and keep them all healthy, i consider that to be a last resort kind of situation.
so i plan to keep bugging her. it makes her uncomfortable and sad, but i think it’s really unfair for that cat. however, my parents have done so much for me because i’m struggling a lot. including buying me 1 whole fuck ton* of groceries just last week. so every time i do it, i feel like an ungrateful little brat, questioning what they do with their money when they give half of it to me most of the time.
thanks for listening bye
*1 whole fuck ton= about $500 worth
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Nu carnival kinks ♠️
Mostly just spicy but Karu and Morvay are a bit explicit
Yakumo
Ok ok, hear me out… bondage. He is scared of intimacy and also scared of his own power, so what better way than to symbolically take away his power. He knows if he asks then you'll stop immediately, but something about the soft bindings holding his wrists above his head and having someone else be able to take complete control is very enticing to him. Soft words and firm actions coming from his partner is definitely what he enjoys the most.
Edmond
Praise kink. Both giving and receiving. He's got a need to please and if you whisper how good he makes you feel in his ear he's going to have to struggle not to cum instantly. Even though he loves knowing how good he's doing, he also loves hair pulling. He loves a partner who can be a little dominant, and the feeling of you lacing your fingers through his long hair and giving a slight tug drives him absolutely crazy.
Olivine
He's a masochist. This isn't even a headcanon, it's just canon. He's more of a fan of getting his nipples pinched and choking than he is spanking. There's something exciting about the amount he has to trust somebody to let them do this to him. He also enjoys a fair amount (or unfair amount) of teasing. Really build up his longing before you finally let him do anything about it.
Quincy
Primal play and all the perks that go with it. This includes marking, biting, domination, ECT. He doesn't let himself indulge in his instincts for fear of hurting his partner. Most of the time sex with him is slow, careful, and loving. It will take some work but you can convince him to let out more of his primal side. Despite his fear of losing himself he can still snap back to reality if he thinks he's pushed you too far. It will take a few sessions for him to actually be able to let himself go completely, but when he does he's not going to stop until you are both completely spent.
Kuya
He has a thing for watching you contort in pleasure. The way your eyebrows knit together and your mouth gapes open like a silent prayer because of him. He loves it so much. To get in the mood he loves to watch you play with yourself before he finally jumps in. Bringing a mirror into the bedroom also really gets him going because he can watch you from every angle. He also loves teasing you and may make you watch yourself in the mirror as he fucks you before he lets you cum. Toys and orgasm denial are also huge turn ons for him. Basically he loves to tease you and the more reactions he can pull from you the better.
Blade
Not so much a kink but he loves if you set the mood. He doesn't quite realize that he enjoys being pampered. Soft blankets and fluffy pillows beneath him, the soft glow of lamplight, it all makes him feel loved and that love turns to excitement.
Garu
Not sure if this counts as a kink but he loves when you moan his name. To him it's the sweetest sound in the world and makes him so hard. To him a vocal partner is a happy partner and he loves to make you happy!
Karu
Breeding kink. I still think he's verse so either he wants to fill your guts with his seed or you fill his until it's dripping down his thigh. Just the anticipation of it is enough to make him a bit feral. If that doesn't work for you though he also has a secret soft spot. His ears and tail are extremely sensitive and if you even just brush your hand over his fur he'll just melt. Nip his ears if he denies it and watch how red his face gets
Dante
The idea of getting caught excites him, but not quite to the point of exhibition. This mostly manifests as marking each other. Scratch marks down his back and hickeys on your shoulders and neck. The way you get flustered if anybody asks about the “bug bite” on your neck gets him all sorts of riled up. Same if he notices anybody noticed the scratches on him, his people are smart enough not to mention it but the idea that they know gets him excited. Sometimes he'll make sure to leave the door unlocked just to make you nervous. He knows nobody's going to dare disturb him in the limited down time he gets, but the thought that someone might…
Rei
Dirty talk and overstimulation. Dirty talk is self explanatory, but preferably he wants dirty banter between the two of you. Being honest about every dirty thought that goes through your head. Letting each other peek into the others desires. With the overstimulation, that's for him. He loves the feeling of his orgasm building and denies himself release until he truly can't hold back. This can be a bit frustrating for you if he tops because suddenly he'll just stop moving so he can get down from the edge, but when he does stop he's going to lean in real close and tell you exactly how he's feeling in the filthiest words you have ever heard.
Eiden
Yes. Eiden is well practiced in most kinks, and so far he hasn't found one he didn't enjoy at least a little. Being a switch also gives him opportunities to try more things. His only real turn off is when someone is being genuinely mean. Teasing and finding his partners' limits are both big turn ons for him though.
Aster
Unpopular opinion but Aster is a dom who loves presentation. Get into something skimpy with barely a gift ribbon covering your crotch, and sit on the bed ready and waiting for him. Maybe throw some rose petals around to help the mood. Aster lives for pageantry, and loves having you completely willing and eager for his touch. The sense of ego it gives him is unmatched.
Morvay
Cum play and whatever you enjoy most. He's very adaptable and because of his status as an incubus he gets so much physical pleasure from his partners physical pleasure. He wants your cum on him, he wants it in his mouth, in his ass, anywhere you want. If you let him cum in your mouth he will kiss you just to taste himself on your lips. Any cum that gets on you, whether it's yours or his, he will lick clean. Never wanting to waste a single drop.
#Nu carnival Yakumo#nu carnival Edmond#nu carnival olivine#nu carnival Quincy#nu carnival Kuya#nu carnival Garu#nu carnival Dante#nu carnival Rei#nu carnival Aster#nu carnival Morvay#nu carnival Eiden#nu carnival x reader#nu carnival#a degenerate writes#♠️
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Hii love congrats on 200 followers I was wondering if I could request a spider man Ethan Landry x female reader where he takes care of his drunk girlfriend
Thank you, love 🕸🕷that means so much to me!! I hope you enjoy this 🌼
Drunk Love
Summary: Spiderman! Ethan takes care of his drunk girlfriend. || m.list
Word count: 1.8k
Warning: Fluff! little angst swearing, drinking, throwing up mentions of NSFW 🫶
update: college is kicking my ass, but break is going to be here soon!!!
did not proof read
ALSO NEW THEME!!!
It was girls' night which meant drunk confessions and dumb middle school games in the living room of the Carpenter sisters' apartment.
As much as the boys thought it was unfair getting thrown out, they planned to have their own fun night, which was sitting in their apartment living room yelling at a flat screen tv over the video game of the hour.
Everyone at this point had found out Ethan your boyfriend was Spiderman, he told them about a year into taking on the role, when he had told them Mindy had stood up shouting "YES! you owe me twenty bucks Chad" everyone had laughed about it and seemed not surprised.
Months had passed and everyone got used to the disappearances of Ethan, but for you it was hard. You always missed him, you felt like you never saw him. Between classes and working, your schedule never matched with his. The occasional nights where he'd slip in through your window would be a treat, but it was never enough.
It was already passed midnight, the drinks were getting stronger, and the music was getting louder.
"Alright y/n we all answered now it's your turn! Where's the weirdest place you've had sex." Mindy stood in the doorway of the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and grape juice in her hand. Everyone was giggling at the question as your face was blushing.
You looked up acting like you were thinking of it, Sam and Tara were sitting on the couch trying to guess places, Anika was making some snacking and drinks with Mindy.
Setting your drink on the coffee table you laughed to yourself finally landing on a place, it weirdest and it's definitely not a normal place. "Ethan wanted to take me on a date around the city, but Spiderman style. So, we went swinging around and then at some point he made this web between some random buildings, and we could look at the stars and well you know one thing led to another."
Tara, and Sam's mouth hung open, "no fucking way you had sex in the middle of the sky on a fucking spider web!!" Everyone's eyes were wide open looking at you as if you told them your darkest secret.
"I mean it's not that bad, its honestly really comfortable plus Ethan he-"Mindy's voice cut you off as she came back into the room with drinks, Anika followed holding the snacks.
"No, we don't need to hear anything about Ethan, I can't look at him other than the shy nerdy boy" you laughed and kept the rest to yourself.
After a good hour or so Tara was knocked out, Mindy and Anika were going to walk back to their place and Sam was going to head to Danny's place across the street. Your mind was racing, and your body felt so hot and warm.
Your mind had thought about Ethan, your heart ached so much at the thought of not seeing him right now. Pulling out your phone you thought about texting him.
The boys had taken a little bit of a break from the game to talk, Chad wanted to talk about how things were going with Tara when ethan felt his phone buzz. Grabbing it from the counter he read a message from you.
pretty girl <3
'baby i miss youu so muh! like i wantto see you!'
'oh i think im just druk'
'your withchad illl leaave you alone'
'im srry'
'i love you baby haha bug boy i miss you'
He smiled looking at the messages, he thought it was cute anytime you were drunk. If you weren't together you would spam his phone in love notes, it was his favorite thing.
bugg boy 🕷
'my love are you okay?'
'Do you want me to come get you? I don't mind!'
'Baby you don't have to bee sorry, you know I love these messages!!'
'Pretty girl, I'm heading over!'
Chad had been fine with Ethan leaving, that had also given him a reason to see his girlfriend. Taking Ethan's car they drove to the girls' apartment, they didn't worry about knocking since it was their second home.
Walking in Chad could see Tara curled up in the couch chair, Ethan's landed on you. You were laying down on your stomach face buried into the couch half hanging off. Chad walked to Tara talking to her softly, he got her up and guided her to her room.
Ethan sat on the ground next to the couch, his hand softly rubbing your back. "My love, I'm here. How are you feeling?" You felt the warmth of his hand through your shirt, the sound of his voice so low and soft made your heart flip.
You raised your head slightly already smiling, "bug boy, my bug boy" You pushed yourself off of the couch making the rest of your body slide into his lap. "ugh I missed you" he chuckled as he felt you shove your face in his neck.
"How drunk are you?" you giggled at his question, something about it seemed funny. Ethan pushed his body up so he could take a look at you.
You laid in his lap with your eyes half closed, "you're so beautiful. Like yes, you're hot but like also so beautiful, with your curly fluffy hair oohh and your freckles- your freckles are so pretty and your eyes- godd I'm so in love with you" Your arms wrapped around his waist, your face buried in his chest under his jacket a little.
His face burning red with your confession. "My love as much as I love hearing you say you love me; we need to get you to bed. Let's get you home-"
"Your bed. I want your bed, it smells like you, and if you aren't there when I wake up at least I have your sheets that have your smell" You nodded to yourself as you thought out loud, Ethan wasn't meant to hear that, but You couldn't control what you were saying right now.
"Fine, we will go to my place." Your face lit up at the agreement. He helped you stand up only for you to tumble, "Okay, hold on." he turned around, so his back was facing your chest. "Can you jump up?"
He squatted down more, so it wasn't such a big jump. Your hands rested loosely on his shoulders. You jumped as much as you could, and his hands grabbed the back of your thigh, pulling you up. He jumped himself a little so you could get on his back comfortably.
He checked on Chad and Tara and saw they were good and then made his way back to the car. You were half asleep on his back, mumbling little things to yourself. "Bug boy is my boyfriend, I love bug boy, how am I moving?"
He laughed at your little comments. You're going to have a rough morning tomorrow. He made it back to the car and placed you on the passenger side, leaning in. He was trying to buckle you in, but you grabbed his face, pulling him to you. Your lips met his, and he could taste the cheap liquor. "Mmm, I love being able to do that." Your words were slurred, but he could understand you.
After a solid thirty minutes, you reached Ethan's apartment. He carried you in and set you on the corner of his bed, running to the kitchen he got water, and as he turned to the sink, he felt his spider tingles go off. The next thing he heard was you saying "oh oh" he ran back to the room to see you stumbling into the bathroom. Making it just in time to the toilet he grabbed your hair as you felt all the alcohol make its way back up.
"Its okay baby let it out" he felt bad he couldn't do more to help you, he hated seeing you like this.
His hand ran up and down your back, as you sat there for a few more minutes. "I'm fine, I swear, Ethan I'm good" your voice was echoing from the inside of the bowl.
"Do you need to throw up anymore?" his voice was soft and filled with concern.
You shook your head, leaning up from the toilet. he grabbed your wrist taking a hair tie from you. Pulling your hair back he made a sloppy bun.
Picking you up he sat you on the lid edge of the tub, resting your back on the wall you watched him. He flushed the toilet and cleaned around it with the mess you made and seeing him clean just made something in you sad.
"Oh god Ethan I'm so sorry- I'm sorry I made a mess on your-" before you could finish, he reached over cupping your face.
"Hey, hey, look at me it's okay. I don't mind, it's a little bit of puck but who cares. I'm here to take care of you, okay. Don't be sorry, any excuse to take care of my love I will do anything" he kissed the top of your head. Your face was even more flushed from his words.
"I need to brush my teeth and take my makeup off" you tried to get up but felt Ethan's webs stick to your wrist.
"No. Sit down. I will do it" his voice was stern yet loving.
He turned around with a makeup wipe remover already in hand, kneeling down he grabbed your face pulling it down to look at him. The coldness of the wipe made you gasp but then hum, the feeling of his hand on your face made you lean into his touch.
You looked at him, seeing the moles you love so much scattered over his face. The brown eyes you fell in love with, then your eyes landed on a scar on his right eyebrow. Your lips formed into a frown as you reached out and touched it.
Ethan took notice as your face was full of sadness. "what's wrong pretty girl?"
"I don't like you going out at nighttime fighting, I don't want you to go out one night and not return. I miss you." He saw the tears in your eyes build up.
He didn't know how to answer at first, his hand still resting on your face while the other hand wiped your makeup. "I'm sorry, pretty girl. I didn't realize you felt like this. How about we talk about this more in the morning."
Your eyes were getting heavy as each minute passed, mindlessly nodding your head already forgetting the conversation. Ethan then helped you somewhat brush your teeth and get to bed, where a glass of water sat waiting for you on the nightstand.
Chugging half of it you climbed into bed smiling, "mmmh smells like my boyfriend" you grabbed his pillows burying your face in them. Ethan couldn't help but laugh at your actions.
He followed you into his bed, lying next to you, his arms wrapped around you pulling you closer. Your face buried into his neck as you moved to get comfortable. "I have the best boyfriend, ha-ha, spiider-man, my bug boy" he felt you lightly kissing his neck before sleep fully took over your body.
#jack champion#ethan landry#scream vi#ethan landry imagine#ethan landry x reader#jack champion imagine#jack champion x reader#spider avatar#ethan landry smut#avatar spider#spiderman ethan landry#across the spiderverse#spiderman#jack champion fluff#jack champion fanfic#ethan landry x you
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and now for our Checking In With The Dallon Sisters poasting
Panacea shook her head, “Tattletale found a way around my sister’s invincibility. Glory Girl was bitten pretty badly, which is why I didn’t come sooner. I think it hits you harder, psychologically, when you’re pretty much invincible but you get hurt anyways. But we’re okay now. She’s healed but sulking. I- I’m alright. Bump on my head, but I’m okay.”
victoria is demonstrably having a bad time with the previously noted psychological pain of being forcibly reminded that, no matter how hard she tries, she will never be the spotless, invincible, perfect hero she wants to be. the bug bites suck obviously but the "sulking" After being healed is an indicator of where it really hurt--not just physically.
(amy's power reminds me of. do you guys know that one tumblr post about the concept of exploring the horror potential inherent to D&D-esque fantasy healers? like, the horror inherent to being perfectly, magically healed from horrifying injury a hundred times over, and being expected to just get up and keep fighting afterwards, without any regards to how your mental health is doing. that's exactly how amy's power functions: you're made physically better than ever, and expected to get back up and keep being a hero, but you still have the memory of the pain and the lingering psychological aftereffects. but, like, you're fine now, so you just need to get over it and go back to throwing yourself in the line of fire, okay?)
amy is also right off the bat clearly not doing so hot--she's acting very shy and withdrawn and unsure compared to both of her prior appearances. obviously that is due to the horror of some random villain going "btw, remember that you're ontologically an invader into the family you are trying to belong in!" but i think it's probably compounded by the fact that amy is so used to being treated either 1. like she's intrinsically awful/unwanted or 2. like she's only valuable/desirable as a resource by Everyone But Victoria that walking into a room of heroes w/o victoria by her side is always liable to make her insecure and withdrawn.
oh, and the burnout. obviously the severe fucking burnout.
“No, I hated that he would have a normal life, because I’d given up mine. I was scared that I might intentionally make a mistake. That I might let myself fuck up the procedure with this kid. I could have killed him or ruined his life, but it would have eased the pressure. Lowered expectations, you know? Maybe it would have even lowered my own expectations for myself. I… I was just so tired. So exhausted. I actually considered, for the briefest moment, abandoning a child to suffer or die.”
“That sounds like more than just exhaustion,” Gallant replied, quietly.
“Is this how it starts? Is this the point I start becoming like my father, whoever he was?”
the "every second i rest, someone dies" conundrum would be nightmarish for her even if she had the healthiest social support net on the planet, but her circumstances make it infinitely worse. she's treated by everyone in her "family" but victoria like an invader, and even victoria has unintentionally stressed the importance of using her healing power in the way that the family wants (i.e. to cover up victoria's police brutality) in order to Be A Good Family Member. amy has internalized that being a good dallon is the same as being a good hero, and failing at being a dallon is the same as being overcome by her ontologically criminal roots. so she works herself to the bone, and when she inevitably starts to falter, she views it as an indicator of something intrinsically wrong with her rather than as a sign that her family + society's expectations for her are harmful and unfair.
and dean's advice for her only reinforces this further:
Gallant let out a slow breath, “I could say no, that you’re never going to be like your father. But I’d be lying. Any of us, all of us, we run the risk of finding our own way down that path. I can see the strain you’re experiencing, the stress. I’ve seen people snap because of less. So yeah. It’s possible.”
he suggests that she try to take a break, but only in the service of "so you can heal more people in the long run." he validates the idea that she could go "down that path," as if becoming a villain--becoming A Bad Person--is a risk all heroes have to fight against on an individual level, as opposed to criminality being a result of circumstance and not even inherently immoral. and of course dean thinks that way--he's a millionaire child soldier, his entire life is predicated on individualist thought with ignorance to the ways in which systematic factors impact people. acknowledging that amy is being horrifically mistreated would mean not only acknowledging the flaws in the PRT system, but acknowledging what might lead people to stray from it, and he simply can't do that. it goes counter to every idea that his life is built on.
he never even tells anyone that amy thought about letting a child die, or if he did, it didn't go anywhere. she was desperate for help all along, increasingly ready to explode, and everyone just ignored it. because as she says:
"My sister’s all I’ve got. The only person with no expectations, who knows me as a person. Carol never really wanted me. Mark is clinically depressed, so as nice as he is, he’s too focused on himself to really be a dad. My aunt and uncle are sweet, but they’ve got their own problems. So it’s just me and Victoria. Has been almost from the beginning."
this is also where we see another more blatant sign of her crush on victoria--it's very ambiguous as to whether dean is interpreting amy's feelings towards him as meaning "wants to date me" or "jealous of me for dating victoria" but i think it's probably the former because there's no way he would keep his mouth shut if it was the latter, lmao. really what this scene is doing is introducing all of the stressors amy is experiencing that, because they're going unaddressed, because everyone else is refusing to address them and she has internalized that's how it should be, are going to boil over horrifically later on. that burnout and fear of accidentally-on-purpose making a mistake will lead to truly being unable to heal victoria later on. that sense of obligation, that if she can't keep healing she's turning into her father, will contribute to her being unable to just walk away from victoria instead of trying to heal her. her crush on victoria--the ultimate example of how her should-be family has ostracized her--will boil over in the impulsive brain alteration & the sexual nature of the wretch's design.
and all of this would've been avoidable if not for, as mentioned in the prior post abt this interlude, the dallons' and the PRT's enforcement of wallpapering over the kid heroes' pain to Keep Up The Show.
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Talk to me - part one
･ ⋆ ･ ⠄⠂⋆ ･ ⠄⠂⋆ ･ ⠄༻✦༺⠄⠂⋆ ･ ⠄⠂⋆ ･ ⋆ ･ ⠄⠂⋆ ･
Warning: (none) pure fluff.
Pairing: Finnick Odair x chubby reader
promt: You've always liked finnick odair, even before his reaping. while running into him while headed to the district market, you discover just how intense he makes you feel. (Multiple part story with a thick plot line.)
Finnick Odair, every girl in every districts boy crush, including mine.
My unfair advantage came with my look, I wasn't exactly what people would see as beautiful, quite the opposite of sex appeal. Though now it really is hard to be considered something appealing to the capital's eyes, or a handsome boy in our district. Finnick couldn't relate, he’s what every boy wants to look like and what every girl wants to get their hands on.
I had fallen victim of his charm.
I was a tough girl though, I never let boys get in the way. Then again, I’ve never ran into a situation where i needed to try and prevent this either.
I have never been chased by a boy, never desired. I'm not a capital jewel, or even a pretty district girl. Somehow even being short of food, my body seemed bigger than the average girl in my district, or any district. I have larger arms, wider hips, and my thighs weren't small by any means either, I never do feel ashamed of my body, It's not like i'll be showing it off to anyone.
"Y/n?" I heard my mother call, interrupting my thoughts. I'm sure she was just planning to send to into the town to sell off her pearls for something to put on the table. I was already lacing up my boots in preparation for the 3 miles of walking i'd have to do.
I walk down the hall and greet my tired mother with a small peck on the cheek. "On it." I say pushing through our faulty door and heading my usual direction into the town.
With each step I took through the forest on the patchy trial, Finnick was in my mind, Though he had won the hunger games for our district at only 14, he’s never failed to come back home from his capitol "duties", Were older now though, no longer teenagers, he has more freedom of where he calls home. I never knew finnick well enough to talk about him in depth, unless it was about his alluring looks anyways. In school he was typically pulling pranks on other students and teachers, but he never did get in trouble, It was probably his manners, he was always kind, despite being a little wild.
I remember being 12 years old, walking this same path home, only I had company, with this kind boy, finnick, no particular reason, he just happened to be talking my ear off the whole time, whether it was about fish he could catch, or how he liked the color of my hair. I enjoyed his presence, He only did walk with me a few more time after that, I wasn't too cooperative to the talking part, I never even told him my true name, "What's your name then?" he said, I smiled, and that was all. Then all of a sudden I was "Bugs".
I sure it was because of my beetle charm, but he never did specify why he had called me this.
By the time these thoughts had consumed my mind, I was a but over halfway there, passing my old school already, each step crushed with the sounds of leafs. It was chilly out, the wind was blowing my hair in my face, I was thankful for the scarf my mother made me wear on my way. The crunching of the leafs were soothing my ears. Until I began to hear the crunches follow behind me. Who was there? was I being followed? robbed? I came to a quick turn expecting to be frightened, but to my surprise, the blonde headed boy who was in my thoughts all this time was following behind me.
what was finnick doing here?
I headed a bit towards him, a friendly smile was on his face, or maybe a devious smirk, I really couldn't tell. "Hey there." he said taking steps closer to me, I was able to identify his smile, it was devious.
I almost didn't respond to him like I didn't all those years ago, but his greeting was to alluring to avoid. My heart nearly left my chest, "Hi" I said with a smile back. All I could manage to get out was that before I turned around keeping myself on my same path to my destination, still being slightly ahead of him.
I heard him speed up a bit to walk beside me, his tall and broad frame next to me was enough to understand why so many girls wanted him. Handsome is all I can say. "Headed to town?" he said turning his body to mine, still keeping the same pace as before. a smile on his face as he looked at me. "Yes, trading pearls for my mother." I said holding out the pretty pearl in my hand for him to see. It was strange having finnick odair, capitals charmer walking with me into the town, but then again, we've called the same place home for years, it's not like he's lost or anything.
"Pretty pearls you got their Bug." he said with a slight giggling placing the pearl back into my hand, I stopped in my tracks realizing he had recognized me. Why did he recognize me? Some random girl that ignored him on his way home from school? It wasn't adding up and I tried to piece it together shooting him a puzzled look. "You remember me?" I said with a near stutter in my voice, furrowing my brows a bit more as he shared a chuckle out loud, his smile lines complimenting his oddly white teeth.
"Hmm" he said turning to walk again, "How could I forget that pretty hair." he said with another laugh, It was almost sarcastic. even if he was being sarcastic, at least he remembered me, because he's been stuck in my mind since I first formed my crush on him at only 12. I turn and continue to walk with him, a few moments of silence and crunching leafs consume my ears. I was waiting for him to talk to me again, or think of something I could say to him, but it was just quite, aside from his little whistle he kept repeating.
"I'm going to donate my fish to the market today, join me?" he said as we took our last few steps into the town, It was a relief he had invited me, though I had things to do, I'm sure a few more minutes in the towns wouldn't uphold my mother's dinner plan to much. besides, what harm could a nice even with Finnick do?
I can't help but smile a bit, bringing his face to look at mine. "Why not." I say following him further. Surely a few more minutes with him wouldn't delay my mother's dinner plans to terribly.
We make our final approaching steps reaching an old ladies market, she typically trade shiny goods for meats, but Finnick wasn't trading, just offering. "Here you are lilith." he said placing what seemed to be a small bag of trouts in front of the old lady, her hands were shaking as she pulled out a shiny locket from her pocket. I had recognized this jewel, She's always had it on displayed, offered to me for food a few times, I was never able to take no matter how pretty I thought it was. I looked back at finnick, a smile on his face as he shook his head at the old woman, for a second I forgot that finnick probably had endless supplies of these pretty lockets. "For free lilith, Keep it." he said closing the locket in her hands, the woman shook her head back at him in response. "Take it dear, there's no harm." she said trying to hand it to him, my eyes were obviously glued to the pretty necklace, but I was distracted enough to see him actually take it from the woman though, I looked over at him, his eyes were darting back and forth from the necklace to my neck.
"Okay lilith, but only for the lady." He said kissing her hand and sharing a soft smile with her. I could feel the warmth of my face forming a pink color on my cheeks, I looked at him not only being so nice to this woman, but receiving me a necklace I've wanted for years. I smile at him as we leave the old women's booth.
"For you." he said holding the necklace up, dangling in front of my eyes, I drank in its golden beauty. "Thank you Finnick." I said gently grabbing it from him, my fingers tracing over the flower detail on the necklace capsule, it was almost shiney enough to see my reflection in it. He had his hands behind his back now, watching me admire it.
"Here, let me." he said taking the necklace back in his hand and walking behind me. I could feel my stomach form knots, tight ones, seeing him disappear behind me, I pulled my longish hair up in my hands, allowing his to go around my neck, gently picking up the other end of the necklace, his hand faintly touching the crook of my neck, It was enough to send shivers now my spine. I could feel his warm breath on the back of my neck now, I wonder if he could see the goosebumps on my neck. the locket fell down over my scarf, It was beautiful. Finnick was back in front of me with a smile, hands on the base of the locket. "Pretty, isn't it?" he said looking back up at me.
I could tell the seconds of my delayed response nearly made it obvious how I was feeling, his lips being slightly parted and his eyes wide in expression made me want to kiss him. I've never wanted to kiss a boy this way before. I couldn't say anything, just stare. A cough came through his throat interrupting my thoughts. "Here." he said unraveling my scarf from my neck gently, my hair fell onto my shoulders, the necklace falling down decently low, resting right above my chest. "Very pretty." he said smiling quickly before turning away from my face walking towards the direction of another booth, me tagging along. Was he talking about the necklace alone? or the necklace on me? was all that was running through my mind. my scarf was still in his hands, him holding onto it for me. I was swooning, my eyes trying their best to not stare at him.
When we arrive at the booth, I pick up some bread to eat for dinner, the pearl didn't get too much, but this would still feed us. We walk toward the path we took to get here, not saying anything since his compliment to the necklace he got me. I start to walk down the path and notice hes standing still not trying to follow.
"This is where I'm off." he said smiling down at me. A disappointment filled me, Even in silence, I liked spending time with him. "You aren't coming?" I said causing his smile to fade a bit. "Not today." he said slightly defeated. I smile at him, "Thank you." I said with another almost stutter in my voice. "I've always wanted this necklace, thank you finnick." I said, I wanted to give him a hug, something was drawing me to him, but I just sat there not being able to. "I'm glad you like it." he said, his soft laugh teasing at my heart again. We both smile at this, I know I looked like a love smitten fool at this point, like all those pretty district girl would look at him even if he were to just walk by.
"Bye now." I said turning away and walking down the path a few steps more.
"Bye!" he shouted a bit so I would hear him, the smile on my face growing bigger than it has all day, now that I was hidden from his frontal few, I had nothing to try and hide. The walk home was slow and boring, finnicks pretty smile and warm eyes on my mind all the way until I walked through my wooden door.
"You're back late" my mom said receiving the bread from my hands and putting it down on our dining table. The smile hadn't left my face just yet, leaving her to notice it. "What's that about?" she said with a soft grin, nuding my shoulder.
"Nothing important, just ran into an old friend." I said sitting down at the dining table with her, cutting the bread with the knife I had stored away in my jeans.
"Just a friend." I whispered, her eyes on my locket. "Your friend sure does like you if he happened to get you that expensive necklace, that thing could get us all kinds of bread and meat." She said pulling the necklace into her cold hands.
I stopped chewing to look at her again, "Well, this one's not for sale." I said pulling it from her hands, gently holding it in mine. "hm." left her lips, I could tell by the suspicion in her eye's that she might have figured out it wasn't someone I wanted to call a friend.
"We'll seen then." she said smiling while getting up from her chair. "You do need to go back tomorrow anyways." she said.
I didn't respond, only a sense of excitement filling my gut, maybe I would see him again.
Maybe I could truly thank him.
Word count: 3.3k
#coriolanus fluff#coriolanus snow x reader#coriolanus smut#peeta mellark x reader fluff#coriolanus fanfiction#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus x y/n#finnick imagine#finnick odair#finnick x reader#the hungergames#thg finnick#finnick odair fluff#finnick fluff#sam claflin
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Love Supremacy - brain rot part 2
As Myung-ha rejects the idea of a predetermined fate, he sets off to change it for Yeo-woon, who’s mirroring him in every way. When we first meet our Myung-ha, we also meet the most mysterious character of the show. Is it Death? A guardian angel? God? Whatever it is, he knows more than Myung-ha, and has some wisdom to share. Thus, a sunbae.
The fact that he is represented as some sort of Author is not lost on me, but I do appreciate that his identity is vague enough to be interpreted many different ways. No religious connotations, no punishment, no judgment, we cheered.
In theory, Myung-ha finds the idea that some people just don't live happy lives unfair. He doesn’t like the story’s ending (he doesn’t like his own ending either, as he regretted it in the last moments) so he sets off to change it through this new opportunity (the Game). When asked, "would you do things differently, if it were you, then?" he unequivocally answers that he would, that he would make it happen differently. Looking back, it’s clear his sunbae is not asking hypothetically. The underlying conversation is obviously about his own life being re-written, not (just) Yeo-woon’s.
1. Mirrors/Symmetry
▶️2. Fate, Free Will, and Happiness
3. Game/Reality
So in theory, he’s all for doing things differently, but in practice, though, it's not that easy. He’s struggling not to make the same mistakes, which is represented with the in-game instability. When Myung-ha makes progress, when he both shows love and accepts it in return, the game (life) is able to go on in spite of the glitches.
Golden moments keep us going, literally.
After experiencing some system errors, some setbacks, his sunbae comes back to the rescue with some more not-so-hypothetical questions.
Through the lens of a loving relationship, he hopes to show Myung-ha that the choices we make out of despair are still our own (free will). It’s a direct parallel to Myung-ha deciding to cut his life short (break up, no pain, no hard feelings), instead of living longer (delaying it, enduring the hurt, getting scars, coping with regrets).
Myung-ha is not quite ready, and has trouble understanding what is being implied. Because he hasn’t reached a state of self-love, he unknowingly doubles down on the fate he’s assigned himself once, and chooses to repeat it.
He chooses to give up (again), he chooses to avoid the suffering (again), which he associates with unhappiness. It takes just as much courage to live as it does to die, and happiness doesn't exempt you of pain, but Myung-ha doesn’t know it just yet. He falls back into his old habits, and symbolically gives up staying longer in the game (of life), worried about Yeo-woo’s happiness more than his own.
After working tirelessly to get Yeo-woon to happiness, and becoming the reliable person Yeo-woon can lean on, he hits the wall of his own contradictions. The relationship is uneven, the choice too biased. The gap widens, the fragility of the whole thing is apparent: the game is bugging, as Myung-ha doesn’t align his needs/desires with his actions/reactions.
Not only does he refuse Kyung-hoon’s and Yeo-woon’s offer to lean on them (he hurt his leg following a system error), he also struggles accepting his own feelings. In spite of the time running out, he fails to tell Yeo-woon he loves him properly, retains important info about himself, and breaks up with him in the exact same location where they share their first kiss (loud wailing sounds of poetic cinema)
Myung-ha’s core issues are bursting out in the open (increasingly alarming error messages appear): because he doesn’t let himself be loved, he can’t love properly. Because he can’t lean on others when he needs it, he fails to be there when it matters.
Myung-ha misguidedly keeps choosing a sad ending for himself when the whole game, his whole life, is fighting to give him a happy one.
That’s not to say his entire journey until now was in vain. In fact, Myung-ha is incredibly resilient (child...❤️), and opens himself to change at the end. He’s just missing a piece of the puzzle for it all to fit into place. It is, in fact, quite a big pill to swallow that happiness doesn’t happen to you passively like destiny, but instead is something that you actively choose. Hell, I struggle to even comprehend or believe it, tbh.
The game being littered with questions, answers, and possible choices/options is a visual representation of our everyday pondering, and choice making. What goals are we setting for ourselves? Myung-ha's sunbae is there to remind Myung-ha that if we refuse the existence of fate, then we should make use of your all-powerful free-will.
At first, he blindly runs towards the game’s main goal--happiness--and doesn’t realize you can’t find it at the finish line. If he only wants happiness for someone else and not himself, why would he get a different ending? By the end, he learns that happiness can, possibly, be found on the way there, though.
The hand, the love he extends to Yeo-woon one-sidedly in episode 1, he accepts it when it is returned in episode 8.
The story comes full circle, but doesn't repeat itself; he gets a different ending through a new start.
From a pure stylistic standpoint, I'm obsessed with repeated lines/motifs in media because they give a lot of rhythm to a story. Like a poem or a song.
The story reaches its final stanza, he listens to himself, and resolves the error, his own contradictions. He found the will to fight for happiness, a way to love himself, chooses to stay longer, chooses Yeo-woon, chooses to maybe suffer along the way a little, but he chooses life.
Notice how the question does not have Myung-ha's answer this time. Now, we choose.
Life is not an express lane, and if you're short 5,000 won to take the bus, or if the bus breaks down on the highway, you might have to fight and make a run for it. It'll suck. But it's not in vain; you might just get rewarded with the happy moments you created for yourself. Myung-ha does.
It is such a hopeful, kind, gentle message.
I am alive too.
#love for love's sake#love supremacy zone#lfls#love for love's sake meta#kdrama#OOOOOOOOOOOF#ok one part left and i'll shut UP
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Masterlist ☆ Heart Without Beat Masterlist
HEART WITHOUT BEAT: Chapter One
Pairing: Neteyam x Fem!Reader
Notes: I'm so nervous about starting this series lol I hope it turns out to be something good. And also, I don't guarantee to post often! I've been so busy lately, so forgive me for future delays. One more thing, this chapter was more about contextualizing your childhood, so it can be kind of boring and shit, I really have a hard time starting stories but it will get better later on, trust me! 😭
Summary: You were in good condition in the way you were, without friends, alone, only you and your mother. But how will your life go from now that you've been thrust into a new group of children and those children turn out to be Toruk Makto's children?
Warnings: A little bit of a childhood panic attack, a little bit of blood… I guess that's all? Very distressed child.
Word Count: 4k
Ngaytxoa (n) - Acknowledgment of guilt and regret; apology
'Itetsyìp (n) - Daughter (term of endearment)
'Ite (n) - Daughter Sa'nu (n) - Mommy
Sa'nok (n) - Mother Yawne (n) - Loved
Next
Your mother used to tell you how important it was to have friendships and people to count on during your life. With them, you would never be alone. They would give you directions. But you didn't feel that way.
Having friendships, people important to you, meant that the time to leave would become more painful.
You hadn't lost that many until your present age as a child, only your father whom you also had no valuable memories of. And the reason you thought this way was nothing more than observing how lonely your mother sometimes seemed.
Many times you saw her with a rosary in hand, sad and shaken eyes, along with trembling lips, just whispering to the heavens about her daily life.
Whether she was saying this to the Great Mother, or to her late companion, you didn't know. However, you had no desire to feel that kind of pain. So you assumed that if you didn't have people to care about, you wouldn't suffer the pain of loss.
And that was what you said to your mother when she insists on making you socialize and, every time she was surprised by the way you, just a child, thought. Then she would always give him a tight hug, while murmuring in a voice loaded with sadness, 'It's unfair that you have to think like that.'
But you didn't really care. You always reassured her that as long as you were still together, you were the happiest person in the world. But this only resulted in a shaken look on her face, but as a child, you never understood why.
You were playing alone with some harmless forest critters near a tree, while your mother was nearby picking fruits and herbs for the day's dinner.
You heard footsteps nearby, but just assumed it was other people going about their daily activities, that is until you heard, "What is that stranger doing?"
"Playing with bugs, of course. After all, she doesn't even have the ability to make friends." Laughter followed after the not-so-hidden whispering.
Your ears flopped back and bent slightly at the words, but as usual, you didn't mind the comments and just went on with what you were doing.
You were used to it. It was wrong, but not unusual. The times you tried to talk to other children at your mother's request, it turned out that you didn't make a good impression with most of them. Being too quiet, too explosive and too alone.
You began to be nicknamed various things, and a horrible treatment for a child comes in the package.
Your mother didn't know these things, you didn't want her to know.
Telling her meant that she would have no peace with your worries, and this is definitely the last thing you wanted.
Nevertheless, what was their reason for acting this way? How important was their existence to give them the luxury of belittling you?
You didn't do anything bad, you just wanted to make your mother happy. Why did they make things so difficult?
"Hey weirdo. What are you doing?", one of the boys approached as he looked at you with a mocking look, his friends following right behind.
You didn't want to answer, but you knew how they worked, if you didn't answer, more headache would attract. "Nothing of your interest."
The boy let out an angry snort at the answer. Wanting to touch the wound even more, he didn't give up tormenting you as easily as you wanted him to. "Who taught you to talk like that? Don't you have a father to give you an education?"
You stopped what you were doing and just digested what he had said.
Your mother used to look at you and wonder how you, a small, innocent child, could think of isolating yourself for fear of loss. But if she heard what these so-called innocent children are saying to you now, don't you think she would continue to think that children are such pure beings.
You were once a pure child, a child just wanting to be a child. But from the moment you entered a new social cycle, you realized that the world can be very cruel sometimes.
You would definitely rather keep talking to the bugs on your planet than try to communicate with these ones behind you.
You inhaled deeply, doing your best to hold back the tears that had begun to fill your eyes. The last thing you wanted was to show weakness around them.
"What? Didn't they teach you to talk too-", before the boy could even finish his sentence, you found yourself unable to stop the punch that flew toward his face.
"Don't you ever talk about my father again!!! Do you hear me?! NEVER!". You were so angry, your heart was hurting and tears were wetting your cheeks, you were unable to hold them back. How pathetic.
You just stood there, looking at the boy on the floor who had a bloody nose as he slowly began to scream in pain. His breath was failing, ears glued to your head, and tail lashing out in pure hatred.
Not even a few minutes passed before adults were beginning to circle the area. A woman appeared in front of you grabbing your arm while shaking you. She was yelling at you, asking endless questions. Your arm hurt from the grip.
You were scared. You didn't want to cause your mother any trouble. You were an idiot.
You were able to catch a glimpse in the crowd of a woman trying to make her way through, and as you looked at her, more tears welled up in your eyes, followed by several silent sobs. Would her mother be disappointed to hear what happened?
"Stop, don't hurt her! Ma'Ite!", your mother immediately went to you and took you in her arms, cradling your head as you cried more and more into her neck. You could feel your mother's trembling hands on your head, her voice wavering as she tried to soothe you.
You didn't want to hurt her, you didn't want to see her sad. Your little heart ached to see your mother like this. "Ngaytxoa Sa'nu…", you murmured.
No longer aware of what was going on around you, you just focused your attention on your mother's smell and body temperature.
Would people hate you now? Would they throw you out of the clan? You didn't do what you did out of spite, they were the ones who were mean to you, what fault did you have?
Her mind was full of doubts and fears, but the comforting whispers of her mother were enough to calm her troubled spirit.
"She didn't mean to do that. I'm sure there was a motive behind her actions. She is just a child, please don't blame her."
You were able to hear your mother talking to someone nearby. Presently you found yourself backed into a corner, legs clasped to your chest and face hidden in your arms.
You only brought shame to your mother.
You knew that it would never work to try to settle down with the children of the clan, to make friends. But there was a desire in your heart to see your mother happy, you wanted to make your mother happy.
But you never did the right things.
Your mother was talking to the Olo'eyktan at this moment, who was alarmed because of the great commotion that started after you hit another child.
You prayed to Eywa that your leader would have mercy on you and not kick you out of the Omatikaya clan. Or at least allow your mother to continue living here, she had nothing to do with your actions, she didn't deserve to suffer even more.
Suddenly the next room was silent, and the next thing you heard were soft footsteps coming toward you.
You raised your head to look at the figure in front of you, meeting the gaze of your mother who held out her arms to you as she spread a simple smile on her lips.
"Come on yawne, let's go home." As soon as you stood up, she took you in her arms and placed a gentle kiss on your temple. Your heart warmed at the caress.
"Sa'nu…won't we have to leave?" You murmured, sniffling softly, reaching out your finger to play with one of the beads at the end of your mother's hair.
"Leave? Where to?", as you walked out of the place that appeared to be for Olo'eyktan meetings, your mother asked frowning slightly at your comment.
"From the clan. You see, I have done bad things, they will punish me."
"Oh my baby, no one will go away, we will not go away. They won't do anything to you, I promise."
You were silent for a few minutes, your eyes were beginning to heavy from the calmness you were feeling in your mother's arms. The day was full, you were exposed to many emotions and conflicts. Your little body was beginning to succumb to the overload of the day.
"I just want you to be honest with me, honey. Why did you do that? Mommy won't fight with you." Your mother slowly asked, just testing the waters. She could feel you tense up in her arms and it didn't help to ease her worries.
"It was nothing, really." You hid your face in the curve of your mother's neck. You believed that if she saw you, she would know immediately what happened and you didn't want that.
"Don't lie to your mother." When you finally reached the tent, your mother came in and immediately put you down to begin preparing something for you to eat.
You walked to a corner and sat there, just watching your mother's fluid movements around the tent. You were happy to be in a peaceful environment now.
Your mother let out a soft sigh, sitting down by the newly lit campfire as she peeled some of the fruit they still had stored there.
She was so distraught by the sudden commotion that began around her daughter that she forgot to pick up the items she had been gathering earlier. You were lucky that there were enough leftovers for a dinner party.
"Do you really plan to hide this from your Sa'nok?", she asked quietly, letting you answer in your own time.
You didn't answer right away, eyes beginning to glisten with new tears as you kept a sob from escaping your throat. Your mother was patient, she waited who knows how long until you finally plucked up the courage to say, "They were bad."
Your mother stopped her movements, digesting your words as your heart sank with the meaning. "Bad how?"
Again silence. You were afraid to say it, afraid of what might happen. You just wanted to forget everything and go on living as if nothing had happened. But you know your mother…she wouldn't let it go so easily, especially not after your previous statement. "They call me bad names…and make fun of me for not having a father."
Her mother didn't know what to respond. She didn't imagine that the simple fact that her father was not alive, united to your family, would be a reason for others to hurt her little heart.
She was not as naive as she seemed. She knew very well how cruel people can be, regardless of their age.
It was a fact that she wanted you to make good friends, your mother hated to see you lonely, playing only with her since you were born.
However, she didn't insist so much, because she knew the difficulty you had. But she didn't expect that the difficulty was because others weren't good with you. She hadn't paid enough attention to see how her daughter was suffering.
And this filled her inside with sadness. Your mother didn't know how to respond or how to comfort you. She only wanted you to have a happy childhood, just as she had promised your father, "I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you, 'Itetsyìp."
You looked up in surprise at your mother, who went back to preparing dinner again. "No, Sa'nok has nothing to do with it. It's not your fault." Your voice was a little shaky, your energy was depleted, but you needed to take this weight off your mother's back, none of this was her fault. "Please don't blame yourself."
Your mother sighed again, she noticed how you wanted to avoid the subject, she saw the weariness in your eyes and how your little body trembled slightly. Not wanting to burden you further, especially with your shortcomings as a mother, she decided to end the matter right there. "All right, let's not talk about it anymore. Now come, the food is practically ready."
A few days had passed since the accident with you and the other children. You and your mother didn't receive such good treatment after that, always being surrounded by rumors and gossip.
The truth is, they don't exactly respect you. They just looked up to the brave warrior their father was.
He would be disappointed by the way these people are acting. But it is how it is.
What you were avoiding ended up happening. Several women were glaring at your mother, keeping their children away from you, afraid that you would hurt them too.
Frankly, you were not a monster, you were just protecting yourself in that situation. But as always, people were too ignorant to know the truth, not much could be done.
Despite this, his mother slowly grew closer to Olo'eyktan's family, more specifically, to Neytiri, Toruk Makto's wife.
Neytiri also participated in the conversation between Jake and his mother, and she confesses that she wanted to punish you at first, thinking you were just another troublemaking child. But upon hearing your story, her soul was softened by the mother-daughter family.
The two became good friends and you were glad for it. Your mother was happier these days. The only problem was that both adults wanted to drag you into the Sully children's group, especially Neytiri, saying your kids were great children and would definitely be nice to you. But trying again was not an option.
"Ma'Ite, trust your Sa'nok, they are good children. Their oldest is your age, isn't that nice?", your mother had been trying for some time to convince you to go with her to the Sully family tent. She and Neytiri had arranged to have a little get-together to weave utensils while just catching up.
You were happy with that new friendship, but why were you also a victim?
"Sa'nok, I'll be fine on my own! I don't want to go." You said it again, arms folded across your chest as you gave your mother a dumb pout, trying your best to convince her. But again, it was inefficient.
Your mother knelt down in front of you, took your little hands in hers, and said, "Look, let's make a deal, you go this time, and if they're mean to you, you don't have to go anymore, how about it?"
Honestly, you wanted to deny it again and keep going against your mother's requests. But as you looked into her pleading eyes, you felt a twinge deep inside you. Your mother also seemed to be a child at times, and it was so hard to cope.
Her ears drooped slightly, tail wagging from side to side, conveying her disgust. But all that really came out of her mouth was a low murmur, "That's unfair…".
Your mother hugged you, a warm, loving hug. And then before she said anything, she deposited a kiss on your cheek, passing comfort and protection. "I will be there to protect you, hm? Sa'nu believes you will enjoy yourself."
You just nodded in affirmation. Your mother placed one last kiss on the top of your head, stood up, and took your small hand in hers to start down the path to the tent of the well-known Sullys.
When you got there, you promptly hid behind your mother's legs, while she had one of her hands on your head as a way of telling you that everything was fine.
Neytiri came out to welcome you, and soon her smile broadened as she saw the small child hiding behind her new friend. She made a nod of greeting to her mother, placing her fingers in the middle of her forehead and then pulling them apart. Then she shifted her focus to you. "Hello little one, I'm very happy to see you here."
You didn't know how exactly to respond to the older woman's greeting, so you just buried your face in your mother's leg for protection. You were a little embarrassed in the woman's presence, she was very beautiful.
Neytiri giggled at the innocent action and made way for you to pass. It wasn't exactly the family tent, but it was an open place full of trinkets. It was a comfortable environment where the noises of the forest were quiet and there was also good fresh air.
"My kids are just down there playing in the lake, Jake is looking after them too, you can go down and meet them", Neytiri said pointing to the lake below, sending you a reassuring smile in the process.
You took a step back shaking your head in denial. Starting to feel a sour taste in your mouth, you almost instantly regret agreeing to go there.
Noticing your distress, your mother's figure promptly crouched down to your level, placed her hands on your little face and soothed you. "'Ite. Ma'Ite, calm down. I'm here, see?", she slid a finger on your cheek, staring into your eyes so you could see that everything was all right. "Mama will be here all the time, there is nothing to fear. I promise, and Eywa can punish me if I'm wrong, they won't do anything bad to you, yes?"
She calmly brought her foreheads together, noticing how you were slowly starting to calm down, "I've met them before, they are such sweet children, give them a chance."
You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath and considering the options you had. You could just run away from there, get out of this confrontational situation, but your mother would be very hurt. Just you going there with her was enough to cheer her up. You had no right to take that happiness away from her.
And also, above all, your wish was to one day become a brave warrior, one of the best in the clan, just like your father. To have a strong and determined heart, to be respected and praised by all, like Toruk Makto.
But how would you do this if just the idea of having to talk to new people scared you? You would never be a good warrior at this rate, after all, there is no way to protect those you are afraid of.
So, with one last inhale of air, you replied in a voice almost like a whisper, "I will, Sa'nok."
Your mother turned away slightly to look at your small baby-fat face, a wide smile opening on her lips. "That's my little one." With a final kiss on your forehead, she lightly nudged you down to the lake, sending you a few more words of encouragement.
Taking one last look back, you've finally started on your way down to the lake.
What seemed like an eternity to you.
Arriving at the site, you were able to see Toruk Makto sitting on a rock near the lake, with a small baby girl in his arms. Her mother said that she was her recently born daughter, Tuktirey. And among the others, the oldest of them was your age, that is, eight years old. You were a little nervous about this, you believed that the younger the child was, the easier it was to handle.
That's because they were less intelligent than you.
You didn't know why, but your mother laughed the time you conveyed that line of thought to her. It was just the truth, wasn't it? She found it surprising how a child your age could think such mature thoughts. Well, they were probably what the circumstances demanded.
As you approached, you noticed how noisy the place was because of the shouting and laughing that the Sully children were doing. They seemed to be having a good time.
Jake was quick to notice your presence there and how hesitant you seemed to be to come any closer. He had been aware of your 'antisocial' situation when he first talked to his mother. Neytiri had also told him that if you ever had the courage to go to them, he should be kind to you and help you to integrate with your children.
So he thought that striking up a conversation with you would be the best option at the moment. "Hi little girl, did you come to play with the hurricanes over there?"
You were slightly startled to realize that the question was directed at you, but your face conveyed an image of confusion at the way he referred to his own children. 'They... were hurricanes?'
You didn't answer in words and just nodded. Jake smiled and held back the laugh he wanted to let out because of his nervousness, it would be mean of him if he laughed.
Then he looked again in the direction of your children and said in a loud voice, "Hey, there's a new little girl here who wants to play with you, be nice to her and include her in the game."
You froze. The three children's gazes were directed at you now. A horrible feeling settled in your stomach.
You still had a chance to escape. Run far, far away from there. But even your legs wouldn't allow it, being pinned firmly to the ground preventing any movement.
One of the children came towards you and stopped a few meters away. He seemed to be a few inches shorter than you, so you assumed he was younger. The boy stared at you for a few seconds, seemingly expecting you to say something, but seeing that you wouldn't, he quickly said, "My name is Lo'ak! Now that we've met, can we go play?"
"You skxawng, she hasn't even introduced herself yet!", the girl, who you assumed was Kiri from your mother's lines, went towards the boy and slapped him behind the head. You could tell that Lo'ak was not very happy with her sister's actions and started a little fight with her. You didn't know whether to laugh or be amazed at the situation.
Ignoring the other two, the eldest among them walked towards you, stopping just in front of you with one hand outstretched towards you as he introduced himself, "My name is Neteyam, it is a pleasure to meet you."
You looked at him with slightly wide eyes. You wanted to laugh at the way he sounded like an adult talking, even though you were the same age.
The other's presence aroused your attention by the way that a "responsible" aura covered him even at such a young age.
You didn't feel so afraid of this boy. He didn't look like a bad guy. At least not like those who had hurt you before. Maybe that was just the effect of being the eldest son of Toruk Makto, the Olo'eyktan of his clan. But Neteyam gave you confidence, and for just a second you allowed yourself to believe that this time there was a small chance it could really work out.
Imitating the strange action, you hesitantly shook his hand as you assumed it should be. With a smile on his face satisfied that you had responded to his actions, Neteyam asked you one last question to finally finish the 'rite' of friendship, and you found yourself secretly happy for the question. One you weren't used to receiving often by others. And so, maybe, just maybe, this time Eywa blessed her with great and good friends.
"So, what's your name?"
🏷: @mashiromochi
A thousand, a thousand pardons for any grammatical errors and if this chapter was really bad 🥲 my days are so busy. And also, as I said, I really have a hard time starting stories lol
Thanks for reading! 💞
｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡🍓｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡🍒
#jake sully#avatar jake sully#avatar x reader#avatar the way of water#neteyam sully#loak sully#kiri sully#tuk sully#tuktirey sully#atwow#atwow fluff#atwow x reader#avatar 2009#avatar 2022#avatar 1#avatar 2#avatar twow#neytiri#avatar neytiri#avatar neteyam x reader#neteyam x reader
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So I read some books about aro & ace identities recently, because while I am quite sure that I'm ace and probably even aroace, I'm still struggling a lot with the ramifications of this discovery about myself, even though I first noticed this about myself a few years ago.
That's why I tried to make myself feel better by reading these books in the hope that it might be helpful in any way...and that's also why I took some notes about things that always bugged me in some way, both while reading the books and before that. (I'm not done with the books, but I already noticed enough recurring issues for a whole post.)
First, I really would like to feel at least sort of good about it. It doesn't have to be pride, just some sense of it being alright. I know that's not a prerequisite, but I don't want to feel unhappy and uneasy all the time just because of my identity :/
And there are some things I like about it. For example, having found a name and explanation for whatever is going on with me was undoubtedly nice, and I like the fact that the community seems to be very open to people identifying as ace or aro no matter where they exactly are on the spectrum. Well, there are always the exclusionists, but that's technically the consensus and I like that.
Still, there is this unpleasant feeling that doesn't seem to go away. The fact that there is something I will never understand and never experience - despite desperately wanting to. I guess that is the problem if something just isn't there, and that's just so hard to accept. Like, other people also might struggle with their orientation, but at least they do have the option to find someone who feels the same and will enter a relationship with them - while this is entirely impossible for me. And I think that's where I struggle the most, honestly. Knowing that there is no way to get the thing I want with my logical mind, because my feelings won't allow me to - and thus people on the outside won't consider me as 'relationship material' in any form since I'm lacking something crucial. And yes, I entirely understand that this would make people avoid me when it comes to relationships. After all I could never give them the thing they would expect from a relationship and it would be unfair towards them if I entered a relationship while being unable to do so. But it really doesn't make it hurt any less, and it definitely doesn't make me feel good about myself. There is something missing about me, that's just an undeniable fact and it reduces my worth in the eyes of others. Is that fair? Maybe not - I can't say, as I can't see things from their perspective - but it just is how things are. But it is very, very hard to accept.
Oh, and there is another thing that keeps being mentioned: namely that relationships without sex or of course also even fully platonic relationships are possible. But honestly? That doesn't really comfort me at all :') Because...I wasn't even nice and attractive (in both a physical and personality sense) - and whatever else - enough for a "normal" relationship, so it feels downright illusory to tell myself that someone will accept me despite my "defects" (if that's what I'll call them in this context, since that would be an allo person's view in most cases, I assume) and agree to have whatever kind of deeper relationship with me. That sounds like such a nice dream, and yet that's all it is and will remain: a dream. It's simply impossible, and that just feels bad. Because I would want to have closer connections to people, but I can't. Idk, but that is a bit cruel, especially as it isn't exactly my fault because of a choice I made.
I also feel kind of uncomfortable identifying myself as queer or part of the LGBTQIA+ community. I'd like to, but idk, I fear I wouldn't really be welcome in most queer spaces since I used to think I was heterosexual before I came across the terms ace and aro. Also, I was never oppressed due to my identity and had technically no trouble to pass as more or less some kind of straight allo late bloomer, so idk... And well, I see why my constant talking about some fictional/celeb mancrush I've got might make people think that I'm a liar and just pretend to be aro or ace for attention or other reasons. In fact, the exact same thing happened to me when a guy fell in love with me and I was forced to tell him about probably being ace. He didn't believe it because "I was always crushing on anime guys" and basically accused me of deliberately leading him on and it wasn't pleasant :/ (But I can't help it...I mean, a celeb crush doesn't require me to act on anything! I just find a guy attractive in whatever shape or form and it makes me happy to have my silly little daydreams about him and whatever. But it doesn't necessarily mean I graphically dream of fucking him, despite what I might jokingly say.) Anyway, I think it would be useful if I could confidently use the term queer for myself because idk, it would make things easier. As in, I'm definitely not "normal" aka not the standard straight cis person I once believed to be, but yeah...I still doubt that I would be allowed to call myself queer. I'm too different to be considered normal and too normal to be considered queer, I guess. So I'm sure people wouldn't be too happy about me pushing into their communities. Falling between the chairs again :')
Maybe all of my doubts and all that stuff...it's not so surprising, though. I mean, I kind of assume that most people wouldn't be too happy at the prospect of lifelong solitude and loneliness, without any chance to form deeper bonds with other people. Or maybe it's just me, who knows. It definitely scares the hell out of me and I hate it so, so much. And well, that makes it so difficult to make peace with this annoying sexual/romantic orientation of mine. (I would change it if I could...but alas we all know that's impossible.) I don't know what I exactly expected, but I surely didn't sign up to a rather sad lonely life of unhappiness and yet that is exactly what I will get :/ Another thing that is very hard to accept, and I genuinely wonder how other people managed to deal with that... I know accepting it and facing that truth is the only possible way, but yeah...I still can't bring myself to feel good about this. I mean, I've been lonely for my entire life, so I don't know...maybe I just hoped this would change at some point in the future and finding out that this will never happen now is kind of soul-crushing, honestly.
Lastly, I know that this is mostly a lengthy and overly personal rant post, so maybe no one has even read until here. But if someone did and feels like commenting, then I would really appreciate that, because...I still don't really feel fully enlightened on how I'm supposed to feel now. Maybe talking to actual people would help, but who knows. Again, I'd appreciate it if anyone wants to share their thoughts (my DMs are also open btw), although I'm aware that a random Tumblr post probably isn't the best way to solve my problem. ^^
#aspec#aroace#acespec#arospec#asexuality#aromanticism#asexual#lgbtqia#queer#(idk i just tag it as such now 💦)#i'm sorry that this isn't a very cheerful/joyful post but idk just felt i had to put some things into words...
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Hiiii I do like to request slashers with a really calm reader that as a kind and calm aura and talks their way out of situations and for some reason just makes however is trying to fight or attack them vent, cry on their shoulder without even noticing that and when they point that out the reader is just like Isn't that how it goes with everyone? "🤔🧍♀️🧍♂️" (male or G/n reader would be cool🥲)
YAaas😈 Will go will he/him pronouns
Request open as always have fun reading
Micheal Myers
S/o was vibing making tea in kitchen when micheal just spawned in hallway
So he either had to runaway or try to talk him out of this situation
"Eee you want some tea? I heard that the guy that thats chasing(DrLoomis)you isnt very kind isnt he?"(yes yes s/o trying to make micheal wanna kill somone else but not him yess)
Micheal enjoys smell of tea (bruh I love white tea with hint of rose/strawberry) and he for sure would enjoy taste of it but hes shy and nono dont see his face pls.
S/o wont make him vent mostly due him being mute and non comunicative at all but He definitly will vibe and think about how much he would rather be stabing Loomis rn
But ig he wont stab him? S/o makes nice tea, keep up,king, he might come again and again just to lisen him ramble about daily life and steal food from fridge
Brahms Heelshie
This one is opposite of Micheal. Brahms will probably instantly vent and cry. He wil talk about how lonley it was and how alone he felt and how everything was unfair
He will hug him, he wont stop for a while
He accualy never intended to kill him, never but He thought that he has No choice. But now He loves that he didnt kill him!
S/o is a great lisyner and great person to talk to! He is so matture and smart!
Easiest way to calm him down is giving him glass of water or cup of tea AND hugs of course dont forget about hugs
Brahms is a big babi he is emotional he will cry a lot
Asa Emory
"???Qhat you talking about??" Look nothing personal but He came here to like??? Kindap you?? Im mean yeah he would love to tell him how much kindaping people and putting them into huge jars is tiring but like??? Sir?? You gonna be in jar next??
I mean its more intresting than average screaming and begging for help🥰
He will start with "lmao this loozer thinks hes gonna talk me away from killing lol" to "yeah sometimes its so hard you know? Once one of them stabed me and I still have scar :( " and "oh you wanna see🤨😳 i mean yeah?😳" and takes his shirt off
He will kinda forgor he suppose to kill him and just vibes ESPECALLY if s/o likes bugs HE WILL BE LIKE: :D omg u like moths🥺😊? Wanna hold hands😳😈
He will eat his dinner and then ask for recipie
Billy Loomis
This guy already talks more than he should have. One question and he will do a monologue about his traumatic past and everything
Ofcourse not litteraly, he speaks in weird sentences (yall seen the movie) Nothing is said streight forward
He will hug them looking for support and probably falls asleep due to crying and huge amount of emotions
Then he will woke up and think "😳 did? Did I Just got laid? Noo its impossible wtf happened here??? Is he dead or???" " hi billy did you sleep well? Are you better now?" "AAAAAAAAAAAAA"
He is shocked, first of all he just vented, second of all he slept on somone with their consent, and third of all ??? He feels better now?? Yep s/o is definitly a wizard, yep no way it could possibly help, he just did some magic
Thomas Hewitt
I- Im not sure He ever expirienced somone just being nice, just being nice, without some plan to gain anything from it, without hint of manipulation or plan to use him
He wanted to kill him but He Thomas acually felt guilt, he didnt seem to deserve it. He helped his friends even when he himself was in danger.
Thomas broke when s/o started talking. Again Thomas is mute he wont magicly start speaking like eminem RapGod song
But he will akwardly hold his hands together and be shy (Thomas is shy guys)
S/o just seems to understand him so well
He wont kill him and he probably will be like "Luda🥺 theres this little goblin creature in our basement can we keep him💖" "No way in hell imma-" "he knows how to cook and do chores!" "Yeah sure we can keep him"
Cool his alive now!
Now just preapre for being thomas therapist for rest of life
Hopefully u like it, didnt really have idea what to write
#slasher x reader#billy lenz#billy lenz x reader#micheal myers#brahms heelsire#slasher headcanons#brahms x reader#brahms headcanons#brahms heelsire x reader#brahms the boy#micheal myers x reader#micheal myers x you#billy lenz x y/n#thomas hewitt x y/n#thomas hewitt x reader#thomas hewitt
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katsuki crosses his ams on top of the sofa, looking down at shouto's head. he only just woke up half an hour ago, trudged downstairs wrapped up in a blanket with sleepy eyes, and his hair is still all mixed together.
it shouldn't still make katsuki go all soft, but at this point he's accepted that he's hopeless.
"hey, shou," he says to draw his attention. shouto tips his head back, looking up at katsuki's face with a small drowsy smile.
"morning, kats," he mumbles.
"you mean afternoon. it's one p.m.," katsuki corrects, raising an eyebrow.
shouto huffs quietly, looking away. "those are just details."
details, he says. katsuki can't help but smile. "uh-huh. sure. well i'm going out to buy groceries. coming?"
shouto usually says yes. the class has dubbed it as one of their Couple Things - they go together and spend some time wandering the aisles, swinging their entwined hands back and forth, katsuki trying to stay on track while shouto bugs him about cat-shaped ice molds and shit.
it's not fair how pretty shouto looks in in shitty fluorescent supermarket lighting. then again, it's unfair how pretty shouto is, period.
katsuki isn't expecting a yes today though - shouto's hardly awake. still, he asks anyway.
sure enough, shouto responds, "no, not today. i'm tired. besides, denki and i promised we'd help some of the others with the english homework."
"wow, too busy for your own boyfriend," katsuki teases. "am i gonna have to up my game? fight for your hand?"
shouto smirks. "maybe. they're doing a decent job of winning me over. you're gonna have to try pretty hard."
katsuki grins. yeah, the challenge is hypothetical, but it's still /there/. game on. "trust me, babe, you're not gonna know what hit you. i'll be back in a bit."
"alright. love you."
katsuki leans down and pecks shouto on the lips, then finally stands up straight. "yeah, love you too. bye."
"bye!"
katsuki leaves as mina squeals about "you guys are /so/ cute!"
and if the moment katsuki comes back he dumps all the groceries and drags shouto upstairs to show him /exactly/ how easily he can win him over, then- well, it's no surprise. halfie's hand is his. no one else stands a chance
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hey new moot :) may I request some shuggy hcs? I am unhealthily obsessed w them. could be fluffy or angsty or spicy or anything in between <3333
Hi everyone, this is @kilucore one of my new best friends. They've only really seen OPLA but already loves Buggy. Now I just have to brainwash them into believing his full name is Buggy D Clown and he's the true King Of The Pirates.
This isn't what they asked for but it's what my mind gave me. Later, I'll do a Buggy/Shanks AU. It will involve Shanks in a poly relationship and Buggy being a jealous bitch.
I love thes idiots.
The Captain Gets The Hat
"I used to know a pirate who wore a hat just like this... We served together on a pirate crew when we we're about your age.... "
"Until he betrayed me."
—💙—
"But why not go to the South Blue? There's tons of treasure there!"
"But we're already here! And who knows, since there are so little pirates here in the East Blue, there could be all sorts of treasure that no one has found yet! "
"But it's boring! Even Roger said it was-"
"Don't say his name!"
A while ago, before the crew broke up, before they all just abandoned them, Rayleigh had gotten Buggy a new pair of shoes. They were big and red and Biggy hates them, but Rayleigh said he should wear them anyway. "They're harder to slip in. Safer."
Right now, Buggy doesn't want to be safe. He wants to be pissed off.
Still even as he storms across the wooden pier, the shows made almost no sound at all. It didn't matter how much weight he throw into each step or how hard he brought his foot down. His storming away sounded more like a gentle breeze.
The worst part is he could feel Shanks watching the whole time.
"Hey." At least the shoes don't stop Buggy from being able to swat Shanks's hand away when the other boy tries setting it on his shoulder. "Come on, don't be like that. Why do you want to stay in the East anyway? "
"Because-" Buggy stops, even as he turns to glare at Shanks. The boy has such a bright infectious smile, he makes you feel like everything would be alright.
Only it wouldn't, would it? Not even Shanks's smile could bring back Roger, bring back their FAMILY. Even old Crocus is gone and the last place any of them knew that any of the others would be is in the East. Is in Lougetown.
Is standing below the tower where they-
"Because the East is easy pickings!" Buggy argues, motioning around to all the sailors, the shoppers, the passing Marines not paying them an ounce of attention. "We can do whatever we want and no one can stop us!" And if the others do come looking, they'll be here. Waiting.
Shanks puts on his "serious" face for a moment, though truth be told it's not very serious. "Hmmm... Well, I'm the captain and I say we're going North!" He declares with a huge, cocky grin. The kind that looks like their da-
Like Ro-
Like a pirate.
"You just said So-" Buggy starts to correct before Shanks's words really start to creepy in. His eyes go wide. He did not just say that! No way! "What make you think YOU'RE the captain!?"
Shanks can't be captain! There is only one captain! You can't have two captains and they all know-
They all....
He can't be captain!
"I have the hat!" Shanks declairs in his same light hearted tone, patting the Strawhat Roger had given him WAY before Shanks had been old enough to be captain. He's only 14 now! He barely even has facial hair (Buggy knows, him and Shanks have been comparing for years now waiting to see whose would grow in first) ! "That makes me that captain!"
"That's not true!" Buggy argues, swinging to grab for the stupid Strawhat. Shanks just laughs, taking a wide step back. That is unfair! Buggy hasn't had time to his his growth spurt yet. "Give it here! I deserve to be captain!"
Shanks sticks out his tongue. "Hey, maybe if you're really nice I'll make you my first mate!"
Buggy's face went as red as his nose. He isn't first mate!
Roger is the captain! Rayleigh is first mate! Shanks and him are just- are just-
"Give it here!" Buggy demands, jumping for the raggy hat again.
"That's a very rude way for a first mate to act."
"I said give it here!"
"Maybe I should demote you to cabin boy."
"Grr, I wouldn't be your boy if yours was the last ship in the se-"
SPLASH!!
Buggy tries to draw in a deep breath but the water is already sucking him down. Ocean fills his lungs, weighing him down even more. Trying to push the water aside is like trying to swim through concrete. He can still see the sun twinkling above, reflecting the blue of the water all around him but it's fading. Everything is getting darker.
Is this how Roger felt? No! No not Roger! He must have been brave! He wouldn't be scared or drowning or poleaxes or death. Roger isn't afraid of anything.
Bubbles float out from his mouth, the last of his air leaving his lungs. They pop silently before even hitting the surface, but Buggy heard them in the ocean all around him.
Shanks don't be a captain. Don't be like Roger.
Don't leave me.
The next thing he knows, Buggy can feel the splinters digging into his back, through the worn out shirt he'd owned too many years. The one that didn't fit Nantoto anymore and had been passed along, first to Shanks than to Buggy.
Two worried brown eyes stare down at him, with Shanks's hair a dark, wet red, sticking to his pink cheeks.
Buggy coughs water upon him. "Ehh!" Shanks laughs it all off, brushing it away. "Hey no spitting! And here I thought Raylogh gave you those shoes so you WOULDN'T end up in the sea!"
He can joke, about Buggy is still mad. "I hate these shoes!" He screams, ripping them off and chucking them in the sea. Without him in them they float. Just like everything, he is what is bringing them down. It's him. It's him that got sick, him that stopped Shanks seeing Laughtail. "I hate this fruit! I hate this stupid, stupid sea and it's stupid Marines!" Him that ate the fruit that could have maybe been the fruit Crocus always talked about, the one that could save Rogers' life. Its his fault they're all gone! No wonder no one of the crew came to see them!
He pushes himself up swiping at Shanks's leg as he does so.. the boy trips slightly but keeps from falling into the water.
"Hey, wait!" Shanks scurries to his feet as Buggy starts to march off. "Where are you going? The ship is that way? Wow, you must be really water logged after-"
"YOUR ship is that way!" Buggy snaps, not even turning around to look back at the other teenager. "I don't need you, you know! I can be my own captain!"
"Buggy...."
And maybe it is there is something in Shanks's voice that just reminds Biggy so much of Roger, of his old captain, he has to stop. And maybe it's just because it's Shanks. But in an instance Buggy found e couldn't move forward, not with out one last look back.
Shanks is taller than him. His hair is the same color as Buggy's nose, though he'd give you a black eye if you said so. His face is as bright as the sun and his heart as unpredictable as the sea. It makes Buggy's stomach hurt just looking at him.
And in that moment, Shanks wouldn't look at him either. His face was hidden, the shadow from the brim of his hat covering whatever he might be feeling. Buggy wishes he could hide away like that. His emotions feel as obvious as the nose on his face. His heart feels like it wants to escape his chest and run back to the sea.
Maybe to drown. Maybe to see if Shanks would jump in after it a second time.
"Do you know what this means?" Shanks asks, slowly lifting his chin, meeting Buggy's eyes. He feels so young compared to the other boy in the moment. He can see something in Shanks. A spark. A future. Something Buggy wants to steal but not to take it from Shanks.
Just so he can hold it, just so wherever that spark goes, Buggy will too.
"We'll be rivals!" Buggy shoots back, trying to muster his anger. "We'll both be captains and-"
Shanks shakes his head and Buggy finds himself choking on his own words. Its the boy's smile. "No," he says, taking a step closer before that smile blooms into something larger, something beautiful.
And before Buggy can react Shanks has thrown himself across the dock and right into Buggy's arms. Its so forceful Buggy nearly trips backwards right into the water but even without his special shoes, Shanks holds tight, and he stays on the dock.
"It means we're allies!" Shanks declairs, pulling back only to pat Buggy's shoulders. He is absolutely glowing. Like this is what he wants. Maybe this is what he'd been waiting for. "From now on, we're our own captains, but we're also allies! And whenever you need me I'll be there and when I need you, you'll be there! I'll cheer on all your greatest victories and you're revenge all my worst losses! Just like the best allies!"
And the way that spark shown in Shanks, Buggy couldn't help but smile back. "Yeah!" He agrees, taking Shanks'e hand in his own, sealing the pack. "We're going to be the greatest allies the seas have ever seen!"
"Like two captains but one crew!" Shanks promises. "I'll always be there fore you! No matter what!"
—💙—
The applause dims as Buggy sweeps back into the backroom of his ship. The smile he'd worn for the crowd immediately slips away. "Well," he demands, snapping at Cabaji before.... Well, ignoring Richie altogether. You could never tell with Richie.
"it was great boss!" Someone cheers and the rest are quick to join in, heaping on the praise. Buggy just keeps sauntering on the back of the ship. To their poster board, listing all their upcoming preformance. "The best anyone in this sad little town has ever seen that's for-"
"Yeah for US!" Buggy snaps, the sarcasm dripping from his lips even more than his make up. "BUT WAS HE HERE?!"
His hand slams down on the poster.
Shanks is older now. He has three scars, ones Buggy int see him get. He's taller but it's the same smile. Buggy would know that spark anywhere.
A silence falls over the preformers. No one wants to say it. They all remember what happened to Kiki.
"What is the POINT!?" Buggy screams, turning his ire on the freaks, these losers, this pathetic lot who couldn't get the attention of one stupid, childish man in a silly hat. "Of putting on the greatest show if it's not seen by the greatest PEOPLE!?"
"Well...." Lionel suggests gently after a ong pause where Buggy looks at each of them , eyebrow raised. Huh? Well... Come on. Is there a single. Solidarity idea in those stupid heads of yours!? "You know, maybe he just hasn't been to the East bl---" The knife to his throat cuts off whatever he had been trying to say.
"Are you saying I can't get his ATTENTION!? That somehow, because I STAYED WHERE WE WERE SUPPOSE TO, WHERE ROGER LEFT US THAT I-"
Buggy pauses, looking out the porthole of the ship. Waling back into town where happy families, kids with Cotten candies, stuffed dolls held under couple arms. Such a perfect, happy little picture. Like a spark of sunshine.
"Don't just stand there," Buggy snaps without turning around. " Help your fellow freak. This is why I can't have SAG members on this crew, I swear, " Buggy jokes as a few of the underlings rush forward putting pressure to Lionel's wounds.
All while Buggy watches a happy little family heading back. The dad with his daughter in the shoulder. The other holding her stuffed toy, ruffling the girls hair. Such a happy little couple. Such a happy family.
"I think...." buggy says, tearing the wanted poster from their billboard, letting it crumble in his fist. "You're right. If we want attention we need to go... Bigger."
His laugh fills the boat, and then the ship, and even as the canons start to ring out and the buildings collapse you can still here him. Laughing.
You want to be allies, Shanks? Why not come see his latest victory with your own eyes. He promises. It will be bigger and badder than even you can ignore.
#one piece#buggy villian backstory#buggy the clown#buggy d clown#you'll never take that away from me#akagami no shanks#shanks x buggy#ask and you shall receive#opla#one piece live action#sorry this wasn't sluttier#next time for sure#my writings#one piece fanfiction#oh I added some Buggy daddy issues with Roger#opps#RedNose#my writing
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AITA for making my polyamorous partner feel bad for having another partner?
Been struggling with this for a while so I could really use some advice.
My partner (26M) and I (21NB) have been seeing each other for about eight months. We have been long distance for three of those months. This has made things a bit difficult.
However, what adds to the difficulty of the long distance relationship is the fact that he is polyamorous and is currently seeing another long distance partner as well. They have been together longer than we have. This has bugged me for the entire duration of our relationship, but otherwise am very happy with him and feel that our relationship is strong and healthy when not taking additional partners into account. He knows this bothers me a lot and has genuinely been trying to say things to make me feel better about the situation- “I always have time for you” and “you are my priority” and whatnot.
He also avoids talking about her with me, which I feel may not be the right away to go about this. However, when I bring this up with him, he always says he doesn’t talk about her to avoid upsetting me (and even though I feel that this is not the solution, I know that I probably WILL be upset!). He attempts to reassure me when I bring this conversation up, but it feels like we never come to a solution. I’m worried that the only way I’ll be happy is if he commits fully to me, but I could never ask him to end his other relationship without feeling like a complete asshole.
At the end of the day I seem to have a really hard time accepting that he loves other people. I try to understand but it still worries me and keeps me up at night and worst of all, still hurts.
I’ve thought about the possibility of trying to see other people too but I couldn’t even imagine trying to do the things we do together with someone else. I have no desire to be with anyone else.
He feels terrible that this hurts me. I constantly wonder if I’m doing something bad by not accepting him for who he is and wether or not I’m being toxic and making things unfair for him. I hate that I make him feel like a bad person for just being himself. I feel like I’m being unfairly selfish, even if it is ok to feel some of the emotions I’ve been feeling.
I absolutely do not want our relationship to end over this. So, AITA for not being able to accept my partner’s polyamorous lifestyle? And please, how can I make this easier and less painful for myself and my partner?
Thank you
What are these acronyms?
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Split
Steve Rogers x Wife! Reader, Fem!Reader x OCs
Steve Masterlist
Summary: Steve's commitment issues turn his world upside down.
Word Count: 1.8k
Warnings: mention of divorce
A/N: I love nomad Steve <3
I’m sorry I wasn’t here to drive you to school. You’ll do great on your assignment! Have a great day. I love you. Love dad
Love you bug, have a good day. Daddy will be home to play dolls as soon as he can.
Something came up and I had to leave really early. I love you, Darling, I'll pick up the girls and take them out for ice cream.
Those were the notes Steve left you and the girls today: another early morning and late night. Steve was always working but he never forgot the important things. He always made each note specific. You quickly put together your daughter's lunches, since you forgot to pack them the night before. You made sure to put their notes from their father and a note from you inside.
Once you finished that you went to finish getting ready so you would all be on time. After putting on your outfit and doing your hair, it was getting close to the time you needed to leave. “Sarah and Stephanie Rogers! Let’s go!” You called out, grabbing your things. Your daughters rush downstairs, with their backpacks in hand, ready to go. Both of them looked around searching for their father.
“Mom? Where’s daddy?” Stephanie asked.
“He had to go to work early today, he left a note in both of your lunchboxes.” You replied, ushering your daughters out the door.
Stephanie was a daddy’s girl. She was Steve’s mini-me. She was always trying to be just like her daddy. So his absences hurt her the most.
“So, Daddy said he’s going to pick you both up after school and take you to get ice cream.” You said ushering them out of the house and locking the door behind you. You got them in the car and drove them to school. The girls sat in silence as you drove, you knew exactly why. You hated dropping them off without them seeing their father, but you knew you had to.
After saying your goodbyes you headed to work. You had a typical desk job, as a Marketing Manager. You worked a simple 9 to 5, unlike your husband. Being at the company for over 10 years, you made your way up.
You trudged into work and went straight to your office. You weren’t exactly a boss but you had been working there for years when they promoted you. You placed your bag down and put your lunch in your mini fridge before looking at your unread emails. Click. Click.
It was normal for Steve to go in early for work, he’d wake you up that morning before leaving and tell you he had to go. He’d make the girls lunches and write them little notes to make them smile at lunch. He was a pretty great father for someone with an unexpected work schedule, but to you, it wasn’t enough.
“Rough morning?” You heard a voice, which you turned around to see. It was your work friend, Suzie. Suzie has been working there a lot less than you have, she transferred from another job in Ohio. Suzie was a few years younger than you, with no boyfriend, no kids, just Suzie.
“Steve went into work early today and of course the girls missed him, it was hard dropping them off.”
“Well, they know he’s fighting to protect his family.” Suzie insisted, but you couldn’t help but think how unfair it is to your daughters.
“Yeah. It’s just not fair to the girls, they deserve to be fought for,” you continued,” what’s new with you?”
“I came into work early, boss needed me. Been here since 7.” Suzie responded, glancing at her watch.
“Look at you being the boss's favorite.” You teased, making Suzie roll her eyes. “It's obvious you’re the favorite employee.”
“Please, that’s not true.”
“Suit yourself,” you shrugged, “well I hope you can get out of here at your normal time.”
Suzie got up and made her way to the door, “Me too, I’ll see you at lunch (y/n).”
“Yeah.” You were about to log into your computer when your phone rang, picking it up immediately and you noticed it was Steve. “Hey babe, is everything okay?” You asked, holding the phone to your ear.
“Yes, we’ve got it under control. Sorry I had to leave so early today, I hate to do this (y/n).”
“You could always quit.” You implied, making Steve silent on the other line.
“I know, I will. Darling, I have to go, I love you, and tell the girls I love them.”
“I love you too, I’ll tell them.” You responded before the line clicked. You sat back sighing, you really meant it when you brought up quitting. You brought it up once you got married, then had Sarah, and then had Stephanie. He repeatedly told you he would quit, but every time, some threat would come and make him put the suit back on. But what you didn’t understand, was why was he doing all of this when he gave the shield to Sam. Why does he have a stronger commitment to the shield he gave up, then to the family we’ve created?
You do the work that’s been assigned to you for the day and the next thing you know Suzie is knocking on your door reminding you about lunch. “Are we still on for lunch?”
“Yeah, yeah, come in, I've just been working trying to drown out my thoughts.” Suzie walked in with her lunch and sat in the chair in front of your desk.
“What’s going on?” Suzie asked concern laced in her voice as she placed her lunch down on an empty part of your desk.
“Steve’s not coming home tonight.” You replied nonchalantly. “He always says ‘he hates to do this’ which means he’s not coming home again.”
“You don’t seem too upset about that.”
Practically everyone in the office knew you were married to Steve. It wasn’t something you could hide. Suzie didn’t treat you any differently when she found out you were married to him. She didn’t see a reason to, she could care less about your Avenger husband.
“Well, it’s nothing new, I just hate it. I wish he’d just quit already.” You confessed, grabbing your lunch from your fridge.
“Maybe he just wants to make sure the world is in safe hands.”
“That’s no excuse, he’s been saying he’ll retire for years and then something comes up every single time.” You say aggressively opening your food and stabbing it with a fork.
Suzie didn’t know what to say, she didn’t know how to give advice on the situation. She just knew she wanted to be there for you.
“I can’t keep living like this, I can’t keep letting the girls go through this, their dad saying he’ll do this and that. When he doesn’t show up for days.”
“I understand, you want stability for your kids and Steve isn’t giving you that.”
“He’s not, and I’ve been overlooking it for the past 12 years but I can’t keep doing this anymore.”
“So, (y/n), this begs the question. What are you gonna do?”
“The girls and I cannot continue to be treated as second,’ you pause, taking in what you have to do, ‘I’m gonna file for divorce.”
You and Suzie spent the rest of your lunch looking up divorce lawyers in the area, hoping one would take on your case. You sat with the idea for the rest of your day, then remembered you had to pick up the girls since Steve wasn’t coming home. You quickly gathered your things and left work to pick up the girls. Their faces dropped when they saw it was you and not Steve, you didn’t take it personally, you just saw two girls who missed their daddy.
They got in the car and you began to explain to them that Steve wasn’t coming home tonight and you aren’t sure when he'll be back.
“Have you talked to Daddy today?” Stephanie asked, putting on her seatbelt.
“I did, he said he loves you both,” you reply looking through the rearview mirror. “Do you still want to get ice cream?” Stephanie shook her head and Sarah said nothing.
You hated seeing your babies so disappointed, you were tired of it constantly happening. You felt you couldn’t rely on Steve like you would in a marriage. It was just you on your own.
(edit)
It's been a couple of days since Steve left for work. You talked to the girls about relationships and marriages and their ups and downs. Just so they didn’t seem in the blue. You decided to come home from work because you weren’t feeling the greatest and to your surprise, Steve was home.
“Steve?”
“Hey, Babe, what are you doing home?” he smiles and wraps his arms around you, you too drained to hug him back.
“I was wondering when I was going to see you again.” You reply, getting out of his grip and dropping your bag.
“What do you mean?”
“What do you mean? What do I mean? You were gone for days with minimal contact!” You yelled throwing your hands up exasperatedly.
“ You know I have to do it for work-.” He defends, but you don’t want to hear it.
“Yes I know, work work work, but what about your family? The vows you said to me when we were at the altar. What did you say to me when I had Sarah and when I had Stephanie? What about the family we made?” You exclaim, pointing your finger in Steve’s face. “You told me you weren’t going to be in this life forever, and Steve here I am 12 years later. We’re still here! I’m still playing the role of a happy wife and mother while you’re out not helping me raise these kids you helped create!”
Steve inches closer to you with his arms out, hoping to calm you down, you back away not letting him touch you.
By now, you were so upset, tears were running down your face, you wiped your tears and looked into Steve’s eyes, “I do not deserve this. The girls do not deserve this. I deserve a husband who is fully present and the girls deserve a father who is fully present.”
“I can be that man,” he says.
“No, you can’t. You’ve proven time and time again that you can’t.”
“(y/n)-.”
“I’m filing for divorce.”
His face dropped and he went pale after he heard those words. He scrambled to come up with sentences, with anything, just something to say so you wouldn’t leave him.
“(y/n), please. I’m sorry.”
“It’s too late for sorry. I gave you 12 years and you’ve constantly let me down. I won’t have it anymore. Get your things and find yourself somewhere to stay for the next few weeks.”
“But (y/n), we can work this out, I love you.”
“If you really loved me, you would’ve chosen me and our family over your job.”
Please do not steal, copy or translate my writings, or post them on other sites.
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GT and Gender part 2
Y'know there was something I never addressed in my old GT and Gender ramble >>found here<<
Something that really bothers me about certain groups of people turning away like, certain genders in media. Like 'ew this is a male giant' or 'ew it's a giantess'.
I went on about preferences in my old post, but y'know what? I finally just nailed what it is that really bugs me.
Having visual preferences, like masculine or feminine or andro characters is one thing.
But often times, it seems like people will automatically turn away from a certain gender in artwork or writing because they see a character's gender [or even sometimes just their appearance] and make massive assumptions about the character's personality.
I've had people look at some of my male characters and genuinely believe they're an abusive asshole just because they're a man. Or look at my female characters and assume they're either slutty, motherly, or frail or bitchy. And then on that one assumption, they completely wrote off that character. [This has a side-problem with people assuming characters' genders based on appearance but we're not getting into that, here.] But pure and simple, they end up Stereotyping a character based on their pronouns.
That's so unfair and reductive, and often can leak through into real-life thought patterns as well.
I know people have their preferences for a reason. Sometimes it's because of trauma, sometimes it's just an aesthetics thing.
All I'm saying is, if you find yourself having a knee-jerk reaction to someone's presented gender, and you find a lot of assumptions jumping to mind... maybe it's time to do some self-reflecting. Give characters chances, learn about them, see what they're about. Try and let your media intake be less guided by your assumptions about genders, because honestly... that's not a great way to think. [And it's a big reason there's backlash against female-led movies, because a lot of dudes [and some tomgirls] will see a female lead [cough Turning Red cough] and go 'That sissy girly stuff isn't related to me!' and write off every other part of a piece of media. When instead, they could probably find pieces of themselves in it if they didn't assume that it was 'just about girls'.] Gender is SO variable, and it's not a Hard Determining Factor in personality. There's he/him characters that are absolute sweethearts. There are she/her characters that are manipulative abusive assholes. And there's everything in between.
So go out there and give a character that you would normally pass over or write off a chance! Find out a bit about them. See if you like them. Who knows... you can always be surprised.
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