#the reading i have to do and that's never a bad thing ...no matter how much i dont give a fuck abt animals
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Straight from the heart (Lando Norris)
You know I'll never go - as long as I know it's comin' straight from the heart
Note: english is not my first language. I was fighting the other piece I was writing so I jumped to this one and I did something a little bit different (* cough cough * longer) and see how it goes! I'm not sure how good this is (or how much you will want to kill me), but I promise this has a happy ending!! 🥹🫶
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
my masterlist
Tw: relationship struggles, curse words
Tag list: @myloverjk-blog @hiireadstuff @c-losur3
The result on the screen was not the one you hoped. Lando had a wonderful race, but a mixture of bad strategy calls, dark rain clouds appearing on the sky with only a couple of laps left to finish the race and the wrong tire compound made him lose a good number of places, cars overtaking him in the last seven laps.
"Is the race over?", you mother asked as she stepped inside the living room, carrying the curtains she had left out to dry and proceeding to hang them back in their place.
"Yes, just now", your father said as he adjusted the volume on the TV, "let me help you, darling", he offered, getting up and standing beside your mum in case she got out of balance.
"Are you going to call Lando?", your mother asked once her squinty eyes read the position he had finished in. Even though the prescription glasses were on the table, she insisted she didn't want any mishaps after she accidentally dropped her last pair while she was gardening and one of your younger cousins found a rusty frame a couple of months later when he was over.
"I'm not, I don't think - he's flying back tonight and the timezone is so different, I don't want to bother him", you blurted defensively, making up excuses as you went along with your answer, "he's doing the interviews, and I'm sure the debrief will be long and torturous - he will need his rest to fly back", you stated as you got up, "I have to check on the project I handed in on Friday, the professor said he would post the grades around this time and if we want to appel, we have to do it right away - I'll be in my bedroom".
The subject was an open wound that stung everytime you so much heard a mention of it, let one having to seem completely okay with it when it ripped through your heart.
The calendar on your wall is full of stickers, both with notes, urgent matters and things you couldn't forget. It's the last stretch, you tell yourself, one more week and then it's done and you'll have a well deserved break.
A knock on your door catches your attention as you reply with the allowance to let whoever is on the other side in, "is something wrong?", you asked. Lately, the negative side of your mind was the first one to speak.
"That's what I want to ask you - that conversation we just had downstairs was not your usual self", she sighed as she pointed to the living room, "I've noticed you haven't mentioned him much, but I don't want to intrude or offer my help because I know you don't like meddling", your mother looked for your eyes before you could fully focus on the wooden floor.
"Things have been rough between us lately", you sighed, "Lando is keeping me at a distance, and I don't know the reason why, mum", you shrugged, "I don't know if it's because I've known him all my life and the comparison is so profound, but it seems he only cares about racing and his friends, and I'm nowhere in the mix. We rarely call eachother, no texting - I know the triple headers are intense, but all I got from him were reactions to my stories and a little video from Max where he's in it and said something to me", you recalled, "I can't be the only one making an effort, can I? Either he realised where this is going and we catch it while we can, or I don't know where this is going, I don't know where we're going".
Your mother's heart broke as she saw you allow the tears you had held on to fall freely, your sleeves bunched up on your hands to wipe them, "and have you talked about this? A long, grown-up and serious conversation?", she mused.
"We have barely been with eachother, mum!", you whispered shakily as more tears got caught on your throat.
"Couples go through phases, darling - do you think me and your father was all smooth sailing?", she tried to get you to smile as she brushed your hair while she hugged you, "you need to talk to eachother, seriously and let it all out, nothing is off limits because that's how you'll get to where you need to".
You kept your head on your mother's chest, accepting her comforting hold despite being an adult. A mother's hold was truly the best.
You hoped she was right and this was something that would pass. A rough patch that you and Lando would work through a look back on with a sense of accomplishment.
This wasn't how you and Lando end, is it?
.
Max and Lando headed for the plane as soon as they left the race track, having made prior arrangements to had their luggage there waiting for them once they arrived. Max was the first to sit down and get himself comfortable on the seat, texting his girlfriend to let her know they were leaving.
"Y/N hasn't called or even texted me, nothing", Lando mumbled, "didn't she watch the race? Doesn't she know that I need her?".
Max weighed in the good and the bad that his next few words could do. He could either be honest and encourage his best friend to finally come to his senses, or keep covering the lie and perpetuate the suffering and miscommunications.
"This is not how I wanted to do this - truth be told, I never wanted to have to do it", Max rambled off.
Lando was quick to notice that there was more to it than just this instance, "you know something - she's my girlfriend, Max, if something is happening, I deserve to know", he said in an antsy tone.
"Are you really so blind to it? Have you not noticed it yet? Damn it, Lando, I've been on your side, trying to clean it up and now I'm questioning it", Max declared as Lando only grew more confused.
"What am I missing Max?", Lando snapped, even catching his own self off guard at the reaction he had.
"Mate, think about the last couple of months and whether or not you have been a good boyfriend, or even the boyfriend Y/N deserves", Max offered.
Lando wasn't expecting that answer or point of view.
The last couple of months roll through his memory as if he's watching a movie and when he tries to select the moments he spent with you, he finds himself struggling to gather any at all. He can't remember any of the times you spent together, and considering his memory isn't that bad, it could only mean those moments didn't even happen. Thinking about it, he can remember the last time he held you in his arms, just the two of you.
"Fuck!", Lando shouted, punching the arm rest.
"Glad you figured that one out almost all on your own", Max tsked, "do you really think you deserve any interaction from Y/N? Thought so", Max muttered. He didn't like the situation his friends found themselves in, and he certainly didn't feel any joy in the words he told Lando, but the truth wasn't always easy to hear.
"Seems Y/N doesn't think so either", Lando mumbled, "do you know anything? Has she told you anything?".
He wasn't sure he deserved to know, but he needed to.
"The last time I spoke to her she didn't say anything - you know how Y/N doesn't want to bother anyone with her things and getting information from her is harder than solving the world's problems -, but P and her talk here and there", Max reasoned, "she obviously won't tell me all the details but from what I can tell, Y/N has really taken a toll because of this, P is always quite upset whenever it comes up", Max offered. Quite upset wouldn't cover it, so much so that, unbeknownst to Lando, the last couple of time Max's girlfriend couldn't join them for their plans was an orchestrated excuse from her to avoid being in the same room as the McLaren driver.
"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!", Lando groaned into his hands, "how could I not realise this was happening?".
"You want the honest, blunt truth?", Max asked and Lando nodded, "I know it's your job, but lately, it's all been about racing, and I think you've neglected Y/N ", Max offered.
McLaren had a one hundred and eighty degree turn lately. From struggling to get their cars in the points, the team had managed to turn things around to the point where P5 and P8 was considered a bad weekend for them.
With the new signings, Quadrant had grown exponentially and it had naturally drawn him to spend more time on it, and it seemed to have alienated everyone in his life that wasn't directly a part of those.
It wasn't intentional, but it didn't mean that it didn't hurt. And by the looks of it, the person Lando loved and cared about most was also the one he hurt the most.
They both sat in silence as the British drive thought about all of it. Things got so good that he didn't look back, he worked his hardest and gave every piece of himself to the cause and the new territory he was paving. Being on the podium was a common feature for him, and the race win was there, up for grabs and he wanted it. Yet, he had been dazzled by it and had let himself fly higher, his characteristic "both head and feet on the ground" posture no longer present and resulting in a degree of neglection for the things and people thay mattered to him.have always been important to me.
"How did I push away the most important person in my life and I'm just now realizing this?", Lando asked, not really expecting an answer, but rather to let out all the frustration that boiled inside him, anger soon following at his late realisation, "what's worse is that I've only come to realise this because you had to tell me - stupid, stupid, stupid".
"I don't know what you want me to tell you, mate, and frankly there isn't much I can, but look on the bright side: now you have a chance to fix it", Max tries to comfort Lando.
"What if it's too late? What if Y/N doesn't want to be with me anymore?", Lando voicesd his deepest fear. What if the anger had finally got to you and you wanted to call it quits?
"Wouldn't you be able to understand that? I don't think that is the case - I've never seen two people who love eachtoher more than you two, it's as disgusting as it it lovely most times. And even though she might feel angry or hurt, I believe she has it in her to forgive you", Max states.
"I hope you're right", Lando sighed as he tapped his phone, his finger hovering over your contact.
"I wouldn't do that", Max chirped, "you should rest before diving into anything about that topic, and today has had too many emotions as it is. Tomorrow is a new day for you to think about it", he advised.
With his head on the headrest, Lando went over everything that occupied his mind, allowing the heavy sinking feeling to settle in. To a degree, he deserved the discomfort he felt. Shame, guilt, frustration, remorse, embarrassment, overwhelm, sadness.
What if he had destroyed the thing that made him the happiest? If I managed to single out the person who loved him for him?
.
Lan 🧡
Hello. You were probably expecting a text or a call, but the last few days haven't been easy and I needed to ground myself a little. We really need to talk, Y/N. Do you think we can grab lunch today?
It irritated you how quick your heart was beating the minute you saw who sent you the text after you submitted all the projects that you had left. Battling an inner fight of whether or not you should answer it, you decided to so it. Rip the band-aid off, Y/N.
To Lan 🧡
Hello... We do urgently need to talk. I'm on my own today - where do you want to go?
Your tone was cold and unusual when you compared it to the older messages, filled with hearts and the pet names you had for eachother.
We can go to that café by the marina, the one with the paninis you really like.
Yes, we'll meet here at one pm.
Do you want me to pick you up?
No, I'll walk.
Your sunglasses are good enough to hide the nervous gloom on them as you walked to the marina. There is no script or guideline to go about this lunch other than honesty and finally admitting everything you were feeling. It could go either way and, truth be told, you believed it would go down the way it was supposed to.
Stepping on the wooden path to the small café's outside area, you looked for the boy whose arms were where you used to feel safe.
Lando chose a table that overlooked the water, the warm sun shinning and bringing out the blue of it. It would be a big conversation, and while the café wasn't crowded, he never knew how things could pan out so he went for the most demure spot.
When you take a proper look at him, it surprises you. His eyes are not shiny like they usually are - there's a dark hue surrounding them along with sadness.
"Hey", you utter out to grab his attention.
The moment he faces you, you feel naked despite the summery dress you have on. All vulnerabilities exposed for the person who knows you best and who can read you like the back of his hand.
"Hello, hi", Lando cleared his throat, "how have you been?".
Setting your bag on the chair, you shrugged, not ready to engage in casual chit chat.
"Do you already know what you are having?", he wondered.
"The italian panini and iced tea", you mumbled after looking at the menu he handed you, "have you ordered yet?", you mused before calling the waiter to do so.
The silence between you after the waiter left the table was painful and hard to digest. You avoided looking at his colourful eyes - once you did it, breaking down would be in an instant.
"We really need to talk, Y/N", Lando says.
"Do you want to go first? Or shall I?", you asked bitterly, accepting his silence.
The waiter comes back with your orders. The café doesn't have a big menu and it's mostly empty, so the service was quick, "I hope you enjoy it - Bon appétit!", he interrupted the tension filled moment.
"I recognise I need to apologize to you for all the things I did without realizing it an-", Lando was cut off by you.
"Let me stop you there before this derails", you stated, "I'm here to have a serious, grown up conversation, so I'm not going to sit here and listen to dusty and beaten up childish excuses".
If the ground could sink him into it, Lando would've accepted it gladly.
"It's a start that you have realised that something was wrong, but you can't excuse yourself like that, Lando. Not when this situation has taken proportions that you can't fanthom - you can't get away with being sorry for not noticing what you were causing", you argued.
Lando gave you a nod, "I'm still not sure about all the things that led us to this point and what it entails, and that's why I wanted you here. I don't want to be blind to it anymore - I want to get all of it so all the pieces make sense in my head. You probably won't believe it, Y/N, but I'm so lost in this. I feel like I've lived a parallel universe for the past couple of months", Lando added all in one go.
"When did your feet come back to the ground?", you mused, "when did you feel like maybe things weren't the way they should be?". The curiosity was killing you, and the answer could very well do the last stab.
"When I lost all of those places in the race", Lando gulped, "I expected you to call and to hear your comforting words, and they never came. Max was the one to bring my mind to the matter", he admitted and you could see he was the opposite of proud of his own actions, "How I've been the worst boyfriend in the world and how I deserved that you didn't call - hell, I'm not even sure if I deserve that you're here today and willing to listen to what I have to say".
It's difficult to maintain a tough appearance and pretend that his words don't affect you, but alas, you keep your armour on.
"That afternoon was a struggle for me, Lando. I wanted nothing more than to call you and hear your voice, silence your cornerns and negative thoughts, let you know that you're the best driver out there and that a bad race doesn't define you. That it wasn't your fault and that you shouldn't beat yourself up because of it, that I was still so proud of you and how you handled things and that nothing could keep me from shouting to the rooftops. But you didn't deserve it, my dignity has been punched by your actions day in day out for the past couple of months and I couldn't take it anymore".
"I need you to hear things from your side, I need to know your perspective so I can understand what I did wrong and if I'm able to fix it still", Lando asks desperately.
"We should start from the beggining then", you laced your hands on top of the table after taking a bite of your panini, "I think it was at the end of the last season - at the time it didn't seem like it, but looking at it now, it was the start. I even took some time off and travelled with you so we could enjoy your break, then I came back for university. It's never easy, I know, but up until then we never had any issues with it - even if it was a bloody run, we made time for eachother. Then, you barely texted, let alone call - but all relationships hit rough patches and I thought that it was ours. Then Christmas came around and we finally felt like us again, there were no work or uni commitments, and it was bliss. After that, life happened again and I couldn't find a way to spend time with you - there was always a Quadrant video to film or a meeting or some event. You, Max and Martin went to Bali, and despite the fact that I didn't have any exams and could easily do university stuff remotely - like I do everytime - you didn't even think to ask me if I wanted to go or if I had planned something for us in the first place. I just took it for granted that you would spend it with me, but when P showed me the photos I looked like a fool and an ungrateful friend and girlfriend because I stayed back, Lando. I never felt so humiliated. Max had his girlfriend and you didn't, you ignored me as if I didn't matter to you", you breathed out. Ruminating was one thing, talking about it out loud was another. The latter angered you less and hurt more.
"I'm sorry", Lando murmured and you were quick to shoot it down.
"I don't need you to apologize now, Lando. What I needed was for you to make a decision then, one that considered me and what I wanted", you sighed, wiping a stubborn tear that got out, "after that, I just watched you pull further and further away, and I tried to get closer, work things out, but you wouldn't let me in. You floated and floated and I stayed here, both feet glued to the ground as I watched you go higher and higher. You were never like this, letting things get to your head wasn't something you ever did, but it happened. You alienated me in such a way that for this triple header, I didn't hear your voice once unless it was from the TV or the McLaren social media. You only wanted to call when you needed comfort, and it hurts that it took Max to help you see things the way they are", you state as tears fell uncontrollably down your cheeks.
Apart from your earlier bite, both wooden serving boards look full and no one made a move to go further.
"You told me time and time again that you would always be there for me, but when I was the one needing a cuddle and reassuring words, I was all alone in my bedroom, crying because of you. When you said you'd be there for me, I guess you failed to account for the fact that you can't protect me from yourself.. Because what hurt me these past couple of months was you", you declared, sniffling and, finally, looking into Lando's swollen and tear-filled eyes.
The tears Lando has been holding back fell. He was angry with himself, at how he had done the one thing he promise not to do to you. He made you hurt, he was the reason you were in pain and he couldn't keep you from feeling it.
"I wish I could tell you there was a reason behind it and that it all has some justification, but there isn't and I can't lie to you. I was propelled from the results and the promise that this could be our year - my year - and everything else faded away. I know it's not any help, but I'm not proud of what I did, and definitely not proud of the way I made you hurt - I wish I could turn back time and do it differently", Lando confessed.
"I needed you, Lando", she bit back.
Lando couldn't find any words after that and once you began eating the now cold panini, he followed your movements, granting you the quietest meal you ever shared with him. Lando was playful, loud, cheery and giggly on any other day. As much as it nagged you that your words were the ones to dim that light, you had to put yourself first. Someone had to.
"Can we walk along the marina?", Lando asked once you finished eating, earning your nod to his surprise.
You both get up, Lando paying for your meal at the front before you left the establishment. You walked along, looking at the luxurious boats and yachts before you found a part of the wall that you was comfortable enough to sit on, remaining in silence as you watched a couple of people unlock their yachts and sailing away.
Lando wanted to say something, to prove to you that he was sorry and that he still loves you more than anything, but the fear of saying the wrong thing and hurting you even deeper was not something he wanted to risk.
"You're going to break up with me, aren't you?", Lando voiced the biggest worry on his mind since he left his apartment.
"I walked here, so I had time to think about all of this, and all I could think was that I was going to meet you there, be reminded of all the pain you made me feel, and then we wouldn't see a solution to this. And on my way here, it got harder because I passed by the shop where we always go for croissants, and then that park where I tripped and you carried me home because of my bruised knee even though I could walk just fine, the bench where that lady asked if Mila was our daughter when your brother visited. And when I arrived at the café and saw you, I knew there was no way I could do it", you half smiled.
"I struggled to see what was happening, and I didn't see what was clearly in front of me, and I know I can't undo all of the crap that I've made", Lando pointed out, "but I can say that I love you, Y/N. I love you even more than when I asked you to be my girlfriend, which I never thought was possible, but everyday I love you a little bit more. I know I won't be able to love anyone the way I love you and, honestly, I'm not sure who I am without you, because I've turned into a person I don't recognise anymore and I'm afraid that if I don't have you around, this is the real me, and I don't like it. You make me a better person - since day one! I'll love you forever, but I also understand that you don't need this pressure in your life and that you want us to be over. I deserve that", Lando mumbled.
As much as the idea of not being with you hurt him, he knew it didn't equate to the pain he caused you hence why he deserved it if you dumped him.
"You're making it so hard", your groaned rubbing your temples, "It would have been so much easier if you had told me that you didn't care about this, that you didn't care about me anymore".
"That's never going to happen, Y/N", Lando assured you.
"It would be so much easier if I told you to fuck yourself off, wouldn't it?", you chuckled and Lando got to see a small glimpse of the world's best smile, "but I can't do it - I do think, though, that we need to take some time, for both of us to work on our own things", you suggested.
"I get it, you can have all the time and space you need, Y/N", Lando nodded, "would it be too much to ask if I asked you for another shot?", he wondered as you quirked an eyebrow, "I know you just asked me for some time, and I'll give it to you, but I'm not going to let you entertain the thought that I don't care about you or that I don't love you any longer. I'm still the same person you met all those years ago and I want to remind you why you fell in love with me in the first place - if that's even the case", he blurted, "please".
"Slow steps, okay?", you mused with a small small.
"Is it still the case?", Lando picked up where he left off, "are you still in love with me?".
"If I wasn't in love with you and if I didn't love you, trust me, I wouldn't be here", you smiled, squeezing his hand in yours on top of the warm stone.
.
Over the last couple of days, you felt lighter. University was finally over for the semester and you could rest, and the whole situation with Lando was better. Even though it hurt to tell him all of those things and see his reaction, and even if Lando still had a lot to make up for, you had to admit you didn't expect to feel like this right away. The right path was being trailed and you couldn't feel more at peace with it.
So far, he kept his respectful distance, which didn't mean that you didn't know he was there. Two days after you met him in the marina, Lando sent you a bunch of flowers to your doorstep, your mother being the one to bring them up to your bedroom since she was arriving from work as the delivery man was about to knock on the door, smirking when she saw who it was from.
You were getting ready to go out for a picnic with Lando. The sunny day invited you to go out and Lando seemed to think the same, sending you a quick text with the location and plan ideas.
"Where are you off to?", your mother asked as she noticed you looking for your hat, "you look very nice, dear".
"Lando invited me for a picnic", you offered her a smile despite the butterfly feeling on your tummy.
"I'm glad you're working things out, Y/N - I know how much you care about him. And even if he hurt you, he's doing the work to get you back - a lot of men would just give up, but not Lando", your mother nudged. She always liked him despite her initial concerns when he moved up the racing ladder and the toll it would take on you. For a brief moment, she was upset that she had been right, but she never lost the hope that the young man dating her daughter would fight for them and for her. For you.
"I'm not sure how long I'll be out, but if I'm not home for dinner, don't worry too much", you added, waving at her before closing the door.
You drove yourself to the park, politely declining Lando's offer to pick you up. As you followed the directions, you spotted Lando under one of the trees, seemingly battling with the corner of the picnic blanket.
"Hey, need help with that?", you called as you approached him, noticing his flustered face at getting caught.
"Hey! It's fine, it's fine", he dusted off his shorts, "I didn't fold the corner properly, never mind iron this", he grumbled.
"We're going to sit on it, I don't think we needed it ironed", you smiled, setting your small backpack on the blanket and occupying the space that wasn't covered with glass containers and pape bags, noticing the logo of your favourite bakery and the sweets shop near Lando's apartment.
"So, I baked these - who knew my oven works, hm?", he joked as he pulled out some granola bars that smelled delicious, "Jon did give me the recipe, but I made them! He says they don't have any harmful raw ingredients in them so there's no danger if they're not cooked properly".
"You could've told me to bring something too", you sighed, "you had all this trouble and I'm just going to sit here and eat it", you reasoned.
"I think we've gathered that I deserve all this trouble, even though I didn't mind doing it - I think I finally get it when people say they find baking relaxing, even if I just threw some oats and syrup on a bowl with nuts and chocolate", Lando shrugged.
You smiled at his antics, "this looks lovely, Lan - thank you", before you grabbed a paper napkin to grab the food.
Lando's heart did a little backflip at the pet name - when he thought about it, he can't remember the last time you called him anything other than his name.
He wiped the thought away as he noticed you get one of the paper bags, "It was no trouble, but I did have to make sure the lady at the pastry shop knew I was the next in line because there was this lady, you should've seen her, she was, like, eighty? I don't know, maybe more than that, and she was very posh and very proper and she was trying to cut in line! Then she started saying something in French and I was like 'no can do, madam! I need to get these croissants for my girlfri- for Y/N because they're her favourites' - I bet she wanted to get them first but I did!", he dramatised the scene, earning your loud laugh. How much he missed that sound.
"Seems like it was a little troublesome, though", you teased. Inside your chest, your heart beat fast at his efforts.
"You're worth it", he smiled before taking a bite of the granola bar, "not to toot my own horn, but for someone who eats pre-prepared meals, this is amazing! Try these!", he offered, forming a shell with his hand before he brought it up to your mouth.
For anyone else, this would be just another set of cute behaviours, but for you, it carried a sense of intimacy you hadn't felt in a while. Taking a bite of it and chewing, you had to admit the balance of the nutty taste and the chocolate was on point, "it is good, Lan! You should make granola bars more often - might even make a side business out of it!", you smiled.
"Charles has some ice-cream, there's alcohol from the other guys too - me? Granola bars", he smiled, eating the rest of it and looking at you. He would never be stupid again. He would never take you for granted. Never ever.
The conversation flowed once you started eating, mainly pointing out the new swings in the park or the pretty blooms that were showing up, and even though you weren't acting like you would had it not happened, it was comfortable and Lando had definitely put some effort into this.
"Thank you for this, Lando", you smiled after you helped him clean up the supplies, making sure he wouldn't have any spills and trouble taking the rest home.
"It's alright, really", Lando mumbled as blood rushed to his cheeks, "it wasn't much, but I wanted to make sure you remembered I'm still in and that I love you more than anything", he smiled, closing the basket and getting up with it to walk back to the car, "which actually brings me to an invite I want to make you", he went back to mumbling again.
The invite was a risk, he knew it. After all, it was the reason that got your relationship here in the first place. Yet, he wanted you there and he thought it would be good. Adding to it, it would be the way that he could make sure he was able to see you as it would be a busy day.
"What is it?", you asked as you walked with him.
"The day after tomorrow, we're going karting - Max and P are coming over for a few days, they arrive tomorrow - and I was wondering if you wanted to join us", he invited, "I know it's not the best environment to be in given al-", he started rambling.
"I'd love to go, Lando", you assured, touching his arm confortingly, "I might need a ride though, if you don't mind doing the detour", you pointed out.
"It's fine, of course we'll pick you up!", he smiled, happy and excited at your answer.
"That's me", you nodded to your mother's car, unlocking it with the key, "thank you so much for this, Lan, I appreciate it a lot", you smiled, raising your stance so you could kiss his cheek, "will you text me the details when you know, please?".
"Yes! Absolutely!", he gave you a big smile again, "until then, Y/N!", he waved.
As Lando walked back to his car, there was an extra spring up on his step, a new found energy and a smile that insisted on not disappearing from his lips.
Little by little, he was slowly getting you back.
.
"Why are we going this way?", Max asked as Lando took the first exit on the roundabout, "isn't the track that way?".
Lando couldn't contain his smile, "we're going to pick Y/N up first".
Max and Pietra exchanged a look before rhe blonde woman spoke up, "you finally came to your senses?".
"P!", Max scolded.
"It's alright, Max - she's not wrong", Lando added, "but yes, I have, and I'm working on it, respecting her but making sure she knows how much I regret it, how sorry and how bad I feel that it happened and how I'm trying my hardest to make sure it does happen again", Lando turned around once he stopped at the red light, "Thank you for looking after her when I didn't, P. I know you have been a good friend to her, so thank you for that", he added.
"She didn't deserve what you did to her, but I'm happy you figured it out and that you're working on it - I don't say it too often, but if you two ever broke up, I would consider that true love isn't a thing, what you two have is something else entirely", she smiled.
"Excuse me?!", Max dramatised, "what did you just say?".
"Did I lie, Max? Who was it that came home in a nervous fit without any fingernails because they bit all of them off after Lando realised what happened? The same person who couldn't even sleep because of it? Who was it, hm?", she quesioned her boyfriend.
Lando chuckled at his friends, thinking that they really had been made for one another, "you two make me look like the sanest person inside this car", he shook his head, pressing the pedal and turning into your street.
There you were, the person he was sure was made for him too. Your outfit was simple, consisting of black jeans, black trainers, a shirt sleeve polo and a cardigan on your arm.
"Hi guys!", you greeted, getting inside the car and kissing Pietra's cheek before putting your seatbelt on.
"Why don't I get a kiss?", Max pouted.
"Because you stink, that's why", Lando chirped in, "all ready to go back there?", he mused, sending you a wink from the rear view mirror.
Blushing, you nodded before looking at Pietra again, accepting her hand in yours as she gave it a squeeze. For the whole drive to the track, you engaged light conversation, mainly listening to the plans they had for the clips they were filming before they raced eachother since you and P would happily drive around in the karts just to pass the time.
For the first segment, you stayed on the stands, watching the team get the equipment ready.
"How have you been, Y/N?", Pietra asked as she handed you a bottle of water she had gone to her and taking a sip of her own.
"I've been well - university is finally done with and I can actually have a thought that doesn't involve it", you giggled, "and Lando is home", you offered.
"Now, I wasn't going to be so blunt, but that is the subject I wanted to get at", she raised her eyebrows playfully.
"He's... Goodness, he's Lando again, my Lando", you sighed happily, "surely, it still stings a little and we need to work through our issues, but we're trailing our way through them. Learning our ways together - it's a bit like falling in love again and it's such a good feeling", you blushed at your admission, "it's doing us well and we're going with it, and not out of it", you smiled.
"Y/N", Pietra cooed, "you have no idea how make that makes me! It's so good to see you so happy and hopeful", she squeezed your arm, "I was ready to avenge you on him, by the way, Max did us both a favour in telling him, because I was sure what I wanted to do to Lando was considered a crime and I'm a good person", she raised her hands defensively.
Once the boys were done, Max waved at you to come down and meet them, giving them the time to get your equipment ready.
"Come here, I need to make sure you don't fly out of your kart this time", Max called his girlfriend after she was fully equipped to go on the single seater.
You finished the makeshift hairstyle before you looked for the helmet, finding it in Lando's hands, "come here, big head, I'll help you put it on", he smiled.
As you approached him, you could see his sudden nervousness at having you so close to him, hands setting the helmet on top of your head and then pulling in on, "Look who's talking", you mumbled quickly before it was all the way in, his fingers gingerly touching your neck as he did the strap buckle.
"All good for our speed daredevils?", Max joked, getting an instant slap from Pietra before he got up.
"Does it feel safe, Y/N?", Lando checked with you, making you wiggle a little to make sure you were strapped tightly enough, making you flash his two thumbs up.
"Ready, set, go!", Max yelled before you and Pietra went off, happily driving on the track despite not extracting the full potential out of the kart.
"You and Y/N seem well", Max offered as him and Lando took a break before they joined you back at the track.
"I don't think I'll ever stop feeling this guilt on my chest, it's like a weird weight that sits here and gets heavy every now and again", Lando explained, "but I think we're going in the right direction, and I'm going to spend every day of our lives making sure it never happens again. Y/N will never doubt my love or affection for her. I just want to make her happy now that she knows I know how much I screwed us up".
"I'm proud of you, man", Max tapped his back.
"You're what?", Lando asked, a little flustered at his bestfriends words.
"I'm proud of you, Lando - you're dealing with this in such a good way! I'm not saying I doubted you would, but seeing you actually do it and make it happen in such a grown up, loving and accountability filled way makes me proud of who you became. As much as I joke about it, what P said in the car was true - you and Y/N are it. Whenever I think about what endgame is, you two are the first thing that comes to mind", he admitted.
"Thanks, mate", Lando replied earnestly.
After a couple of laps from you, you saw the boys joining you in the track, making you assure that whenever they lapped you, you made a Mario Kart like noise, always managing to get a smile and a headshake from Lando and Max.
Once you were done, Max and Pietra volunteered to take all of the supplies back to the storage room.
"Did you enjoy your day, Y/N?", Lando asked as he approached you.
Surprising him, you nodded before you hugged him, "I haven't been this happy in a long time", you cuddled him, letting your head rest on his chest and letting yourself feel enveloped by his arms after the initial shock wore off.
"I'm glad", Lando uttered out before he composed himself, "I just want you to know that I could fulfill all your dreams and that there I'll never do anything to hurt you again. I'm well aware of all shit I've done and put you through, and how accountable I am for it. I just want to make you happy", he chuckled, "I don't want anything else in this world other than to make you happy, to show you how much I love you and that I want make this work, I want to make us work", he let out in such a serious and intense tone that you could feel a knot forming your throat, "you were my first love and I want you to be my last, Y/N".
"Lan...", you gasped softly, "I know it hasn't been good for you, but I just need a little bit more time to put it behind me, once for all", you added.
"I know, and that's alright", he mumbled against the top of your head, "I just wanted you to know that it is coming straight from my heart - everything I do, I do it for you", plucking up the courage to press a kiss there.
You closed your eyes and basked in the feeling, "two Bryan Adams references in the same sentence from the guy who used to DJ? You impress me, Lando Norris", you giggled and teased him playfully, feeling the rubble from his own laugh on his chest.
"I'll make sure to impress you everyday that we're alive, Y/N Y/L/N", he promised.
And he intended to keep it.
.
Lando invited you to his apartment for a cosy night in, thinking the plans over and over while he waited for you to arrive.
The delivery service was faster than he expected so he wrapped the takeout boxes in all of the kitchen towells he had so they would help retain the heat while you weren't there yet.
The whole apartment was tidy, he had your favourite blanket on the sofa and the TV had your favourite shows ready to stream in the background as you hopefully shared a comforting meal.
Your acceptance to come to his place made Lando feel very pleased with the way you were trailing in your relationship. He had been able to correct his mistakes and make you happy again. Even though there had been moments where he seemed to forget, he now knew that you had always been and will always be a priority in his life. He had never been in love with anyone else, and he was sure he would always be in love with you until his last breath.
A knock on his door pulled him out of his thoughts, heading up to the door to open it, "Hello hello! Come in", he gestured as you stepped inside, pecking his lips on the way - a few days prior, you had kissed him out of nowhere when you went to the bookshop and you swore he looked like a cartoon, all wide eyes and blushy cheeks.
Lando assured you you wouldn't leave the house and it would be just the two of you, so you hadn't bothered to put together a proper outfit, opting to wear a pair of leggings and an old Quadrant hoodie.
"I wasn't sure if I should bring anything, so I stopped by the sweets shop to get some of these hard candies, apparently they're very trendy now", you giggled sweetly as you set the bag on his hands so you could take your trainers off.
"You didn't have to, but thanks! We'll do a taste test after dinner - which is here by the way", he guided you to the living room.
Unravelling the mountain of kitchen towells, he had you sit down before he opened the containers, handing you a plate after you chose a bit of each of the dishes he ordered, "thank you, Lan", you smiled, sitting criss-cross on the sofa and waiting for him to do the same before you started eating.
"These are really good, have you tried them? They're new on their menu and when the guy explained it to me, I thought you'd like it", he pointed to one of the bite sized pieces.
"They are! They're not too heavy on the seasoning and they're really nice when you dip them in this sauce - try it!", you offered him the small cup.
"Is this going to be like the time you made me dip my spring rolls in that other sauce you claimed was the best thing in the world?", he asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Just try it, Lan!", you insisted, getting one from your plate, dipping it in the sauce and taking it up to Lando's mouth, your hand under the chopsticks in case some of it fell on his clothes.
Lando chewed it before nodding and humming in satisfaction, "is it good", he admitted with a smile after he wiped his lips.
Once you finished eating, you helped Lando bring everything back to the kitchen, saving the leftovers on his fridge, washing the plates and putting them away.
"You didn't have to help, I could've done it myself", Lando nudged before he laced your hand in his and pulled you back to the living room, "do you want to watch something?", he asked.
"There's this new Disney movie I haven't watched if you're up for it - or any of the shows we usually watch, I'm not picky", you answered quickly.
"Disney it is", he smiled sitting down and resting his arm on the back of the sofa, hoping you'd sit next to him and cuddle him.
You shuffled around before grabbing the fluffy blanket, pulling it over your legs and tentatively closing the distance between you, taking the plunge and taking a spot on his chest.
Once the movie was playing, Lando's arm dropped to wrap around you, lulling you closer to him and rubbing your arm.
"I can hear you thinking, and I'm sure you're not thinking about that little goat", you nodded to the screen.
"I'm watching the movie, I swear - and he's quite funny actually! He's also Mila's favourite character, at least he was last week", Lando chuckled, "but I was also thinking about us", he admitted.
"You were?", you turned to look up at him, wanting to know more.
"You do know I will apologize for what I did until the end of our lives, don't you?", Lando reflected out loud.
"Lando, stop it, it's forgiven and forgotten", you offered.
"Is it really?", he asked, a small smile breaking his way into his lips.
"It is, it's behind us now", you kissed his clothed chest.
"I will never forget it, though. It doesn't matter how many times you tell me to forget it or that you've forgiven me", he let out a shaky sigh, "I don't think I will, I hate myself for what did to you, the hurt that I caused you".
"Lando, let's not talk about it right now - not now, not ever. It's a part of our story, yes, and we learned from it, but I don't want to to remember every day. We are good now, and I don't want you to torture yourself with something that is out of your reach and that you can't change", you told him sternly, now sitting back against the sofa so you can face your boyfriend, "Promise me we won't mention this again, Lando".
"You're right", Lando agrees, "Okay, you're right, I promise, Y/N", he stated with a smile.
Your delicate lips peck his quickly before you go in for a second kiss, longer and more intense this time, and you both got lost in eachother.
You couldn't change what happened, but you could learn from it and work everyday to make sure it never happened again.
Lando was crazy about you, about who he was when was with you and how you made him feel, and you felt the same way about him.
"I love you, Lando", you smiled after you pulled away, resting your forehead in his.
"I love you forever, Y/N", he whispered, sealing his promise with a peck and bracing himself, "I'm never taking you for granted, and maybe this is a big gesture and I'm not sure how much this fits our new way - new patch? It's not a patch if we want it to last forever, right? - anyway, I would like to ask you to move in with me", Lando stated, "it doesn't have to be tomorrow or right away, we'll do it when you're ready! I just- I spend so much time of the year away as it is, and I don't want to cut the short time even shorter when it comes to you, so this way we'll be together for a bit longer - even if it's just at nightime and we can intertwine our legs or I can warm up the bed for you", he rambled on and you were sure he wouldn't stop anytime soon.
"Hey, hey! Lando, baby", you cupped his face with your hands, "look at me", you smiled as you straddled his lap, your thighs on each side of his and keeping you from fully sitting on him, "good now?".
"Well, since you're already there - sit, please", Lando added before he allowed himself to stress about your answer.
"I don't want to squash you", you mumbled.
Laying his hands in your thighs, he pulled you down, "I said sit down", he spoke sternly despite the playful glint on his eyes, "it's my home after all, I get to make the rules".
"Oh, I thought it was our home, but maybe I misread th-", your playfulness was cut short as your boyfriend flipped you around, your back hitting the soft sofa cushion with a yelp.
"You're moving in? For real?", he asked.
"Yes, baby, I'm moving in", you cupped his cheek, pulling him for a kiss, "I love you".
"My love, I'm going to spend everyday reminding you how beautiful, how strong", he started kissing your face with every word, "how kind, how amazing, how sexy, how hot, how smart, how kind, how incredible you are", he stopped just above your lips, "how all mine you are - I love you Y/N, forever", before he kissed your lips.
#lando norris imagine#lando norris fanfic#lando norris x reader#lando norris fic#lando norris x you#lando norris fluff#lando norris angst#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 fluff#f1 angst#ln4 x reader
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not to be a boomer, but I do worry about the current generation of kids being raised with iPads.
first off. some of them literally can't hold a pencil because their parents never gave them physical toys to grip and play with, developing their fine motor skills.
you might ask why do we even need to learn how to write physically anymore- well, frankly, because if you're stranded on an island somewhere and you need to write HELP, you might not have the strength to hold a pencil, but you can at least hold a stick.
but on a more general note.
writing by hand helps you remember things better. it forces you to focus in a way that typing something word for word does not. a person can transcribe what a professor says without even thinking about it.
someone writing notes has to consider what to write and what to omit. it also activates more parts of your brain, forcing you to flex the parts of your brain related to learning and communicating, while also engaging the part of your brain dedicated to muscle control and precision.
but in general, I think the issue isn't even oh technology is bad and kids are getting dumber.
you can have PowerPoints AND take physical notes. that could help you learn even better than the olden days where you just had to remember everything that was thrown at you. or read very limited, out of date books.
the problem is that the generation that raised/is raising this generation of children just doesn't understand the true impact that all this technology will have on their kids. or they just don't care.
because our generation had the internet yes, but it wasn't widely accessible for most of us, sharing our computers with the entire family in the kitchen. it was also the internet in its infancy, where it wasn't quite so predatory, when it was lawless and disturbing, yes, but it wasn't weaponized by corporations trying to sell you things and steal your data, it wasn't flooded with bots and ai and all sorts of things that the human brain can't even distinguish as real or fake, especially when you're just a little kid.
that generation still played with physical toys. we celebrated when it snowed and we could stay home.
we also came from a gen that still, vaguely, cared about some form of community and had third spaces for kids to hang out.
90s children, who still had some memories of both playing outside on a playground and playing Mario Kart on the Nintendo 64 with their friends, who both went out to the mall and had a club penguin account.
we grew up with laptops and smart boards. maybe some of us had them in high school or college, but we still physically went to class and developed relationships. learned uncomfortable things about ourselves and others, the way humans do.
met new people and were exposed to new ideas, away from our parents. but not from some fucking influencer trying to sell us Sephora products.
we had to study for things, instead of just being able to Google shit for some bullshit online test.
which is also something that really concerns me. so many kids today can so easily Google answers for every test, and while tests don't ultimately matter in the real world, they still provide some basis for things that do matter.
like I'm just imagining medical students googling how to perform an appendectomy on the day of, and just using a YouTube tutorial to guide them through, and shuddering.
there are some things that the Internet can't teach you.
there always will be.
but I don't think my generation is really helping their kids find the balance that we were given naturally growing up.
the boomers and gen xers had fist fights and we had bullying someone online until they committed suicide.
and now kids use AI to spread fake nudes of girls.
but the laws haven't caught up with a lot of this stuff yet, and certainly won't while we have dinosaurs running our government. and culture takes even longer to change than laws.
I also worry because I know how badly covid affected kids worldwide. how they struggle to read and do math, because remote learning just isn't good for kids.
and I can't even blame them!! I literally teleworked for 4 years and even I can admit that I'm not nearly as good at focusing at home as I am in the office.
it's hard for kids with social anxiety and disabilities, yes I know, I know, trust me, I have social anxiety, and as a hybrid worker ATM, I highly doubt I'd be able to handle 5 days a week in the office.
but it's also not particularly good for kids to stay home ALL the time, entertaining themselves in their room and never being challenged, and never meeting people other than their parents.
the iPad is more of a symbol of that problem than the direct problem.
if your entire... world view is limited to what you can see on your iPad... I mean what a terrible world view you'll have.
you're a 10 year old using TikTok and all you ever see is the same opinion over and over until you can scarcely comprehend people who have an opposing opinion.
you see fake videos that seem so real. that must be real, and so comforting, aren't they, those videos that seem so real?
you let 30 year old influencers who are trying to grift people shape your world view.
and it's not even your fault.
your parents aren't doing anything to help you.
you're young and you're being barraged with entertainment and fake educational videos and how to guides that accidentally create mustard gas in your toilet.
your parents should be teaching you to find a balance between these things. they should be telling you what's real and caution you about the things you see.
they should limit your fucking time on the iPad actually. take you to a fucking park and let you roll in the mud or some shit.
and then when you're a teenager and a young adult, then you can start deciding for yourself what you believe.
but a lot of these weird millennial/gen z parents, man. just let your 1 year old scroll through vids on TikTok while you don't even talk to them or look at them once.
maybe it's because they don't see the harm in it, but I don't get it.
adults can watch TikTok all day and know, ahhh this is bad for me. I'm not doing anything I actually want to be doing.
adults can see other adults doing dumb shit and say ah you're sponsored. someone paid you money to say and do that. silly.
but kids are just kids.
they don't have discipline and frankly, that's not their responsibility. that is yours.
you should be teaching them that they can't have everything in life at their finger tips at all times, actually.
the iPad doesn't solve all of your problems, nor will it think critically for you.
so I worry about if humanity can really keep up with its own technology.
our species is still in its infancy, believe it or not.
so maybe these are just growing pains, and future generations will be able to look back on this era and know the proper balance.
but as someone living in 2024.
I wonder just how much pain is left before we really mature and either make it or break it.
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Oooh since you want dark stuff how would yandere Alastor who falls for the reader , deal with love rivals 👀
You know he's planning something horrible.
Yandere! Alastor dealing with rivals
Pairing: Romantic/Platonic (Dubious on true intentions)
Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Possessive behavior, Sadism, Violence, Blood, Murder, Threats, Mentioned torture, Forced companionship/relationship.
You can bet that Alastor doesn't want anyone touching what's his.
He is a demon who knows what he wants... and will get it no matter what it takes.
Honestly, he'd be bad if he didn't own your soul... and even worse if he did.
I mean... we've seen how scary he can get in the show, right?
For example, remember when he was protecting the Hotel?
Yeah....
Except... if he feels someone has wronged him by touching you... then he'll draw things out.
Trust me, Alastor will know if someone had gotten too close to you.
He can almost smell another demon's stink on you.
This concept will focus on general behavior with demons, although with bigger names his approach would be different.
For example, Vox.
The Overlord most likely wouldn't get close to you without Alastor knowing.
For this concept... maybe you have some friends who are lesser demons.
Another thing we've seen is how others act around Alastor.
Y'know... other demons run and hide or just straight up... well... die.
So imagine if you had friends who felt they could be close to you.
Honestly, Alastor tolerated it since they seemed brave enough to stand before him.
Or stupid... it depends.
If you were talking to your friend or a potential partner... Alastor would interrupt.
I think the exchange would be even scarier if he did own your soul.
He acts charismatic as usual.
He pulls you aside and against him, a permanent grin as he greets those around you.
He's oddly charming... even though he's irritated that he has to share what's his with them.
Perhaps to even prove a point he'll summon the chain around your neck.
If that doesn't show ownership... then they're dense.
He's possessive... ears flicking as he introduces himself.
They better know he's an Overlord.
Alastor can do basic intimidation like any other demon, but the fun part to him is more... violent.
Perhaps your "friends" aren't swayed by his presence.
Maybe they actually try to stand up for you.
Maybe they try to court you anyways?
Or maybe someone hurts you...?
Point is, if they haven't died yet, they will.
Alastor sees no issue in a bit of torture.
He's probably done far worse.
A quick death is merciful for those Alastor considers rivals.
However, if you had a lover or someone similarly close... Alastor likes to drag out their fate.
His own intentions with you are dubious at best.
Can't really call him a lover, can't really call him a friend...
Perhaps he's a master? Even then... you can never read him.
Alastor would love to tie a rival down and play with them a bit.
He'd get as bloody as he wants, he'd listen to their screams like it's the radio.
He can only laugh as they beg.
No one messes with the radio demon's things.
They should've cowered away like the rest.
Now they're dead at Alastor's claws, all while he whistles away and prepares to see you again.
When you don't see them again, you aren't dumb.
You have a feeling they've angered Alastor.
If you were close with this person or tried to use them to get away from Alastor... He'd make you listen to their screams.
Alastor enjoys dealing with rivals.
He thrives off their pain, this is the same demon who's kill Overlords after all.
Safe to say... you aren't getting away from Alastor.
No one's going to be able to help you...
Their screams are a warning to behave for Alastor... even if you hate it.
"Oh, Darling! You have new friends~ This'll be fun, won't it~?"
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𝒍𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 ✧ 𝒓. 𝒄.
pairing: ex!rafe cameron x f!reader
warnings: angst, physical injuries, blood (it's brief), objetification of reader (not by rafe).
word count: 1,1k
the vibrating sound of your phone on the bedside table startles you a bit. even with your vision blurry, you manage to read rafe’s name shining on the screen. it’s late, the clock marks fifteen past two, and getting a call from him at this time is worrying, but fighting the fatigue, you answer his call.
“hello?”
“it’s me. you home?” his tone is urgent, which worries you even more. he’s definitely in trouble.
“why?”
“are you home or not?”
“yes, rafe. why are you calling me?”
“i’m at your door and i need your help right now.”
he hangs up abruptly and you sigh, anticipating yet another stressful interaction with rafe. it’s in situations like these that you wonder why you gave him the time of the day for almost a whole year of your life.
rafe is trouble, and you want none of it.
you quickly get up and head to the entrance of your small house. small, but yours. all the furniture, even if it is second-hand, is yours, as it was bought with your money, earned with a lot of sweat, something rafe will never understand.
as soon as you open the door, you come across a bruised and bloody rafe, which scares you. before you can say anything, he enters your house and sits on the tiny couch.
the scene is deplorable.
“rafe! what- what the hell happened to you?!”
“been in a fight, alright? i just can’t come back home looking like this.”
“in a fight with who?”
“i doesn’t matter. just help me.”
you sigh, tired and irritated. rafe is difficult to deal with. he beats the others out of tiredness and that is irritating. you go to the bathroom and grab a small bag with first aid items, and return to the living room right away, sitting next to him on the couch.
he winces when you pat the cotton ball on his bruises, but you don’t feel bad at all. this is what he deserves. you avoid looking him in the eye while you’re cleaning his face up. you know you can’t resist his baby blues.
you take his hands in yours. the contrast of size is beautiful, somehow. his huge, calloused hands with golden rings have always been attractive. his knuckles are red and quite swollen. you clean his hands up and only hear rafe’s huffs when he feels the sting of the rubbing alcohol. you might be doing that on purpose.
very quickly, you put some bandaids where you find necessary and bandage his hand up, where it’s swollen.
“all done.”
“thank you.”
oh, he knows the magic words. you know you’ll regret it, but you have to ask.
“what happened, rafe?”
he sighs and leans back, taking a deep, exhaustive breath.
“it doesn’t matter, y/n. it’s solved, it’s done.”
“you woke me up in the middle of the night, came over unannounced and made me patch you up. i deserve to know what the fuck happened and if i’m in trouble.”
“you’re not in trouble.” he clarifies, as he passes his fingers over the gauze on his hand. “one of barry’s friends said some weird shit about you.”
“who said what?” you frown.
you never really liked barry, let alone his “friends”. they’re beyond shady and you hate how rafe keeps them in his life.
“you don’t want to know.” you cock an eyebrow and rafe sighs once again, defeated. “babe, it’s inappropriate, don’t make me repeat it.”
babe. you forgot how much you loved when rafe called you sweet nicknames. yes, rafe is an overall asshole, but he isn’t all bad, you have to admit it. the thing is that he actively lets his bad side take over, and you can’t handle that.
“say it.”
“it was bryan. he, um… he said he… um…”
“say it, rafe.”
“he said he hoped to be the next in line to be inside your c-”
“okay, i get it.” you feel like crying and throwing up, but you maintain your composure. “he said that because he wanted to get to you, rafe, that’s all. i’ve never even spoken to him.”
you don’t know why you’re explaining yourself to rafe, but you feel like you have to. for some reason, you don’t want him to think you’re a slut that fucks every guy. deep down, you want rafe to realize he lost something really great, but that day may never come.
“i know, i’m not worried about that.” he says. “i just don’t want him near you.”
“rafe-”
“i know we’re not together anymore, and i swear i’m not being controlling, but bryan is bad and i don’t want him near you, ever. okay?”
“okay.”
after your response, rafe seems to relax a bit. he closes his eyes and his smug makes a comeback.
“you should’ve seen his face. what a bitch.”
you roll your eyes and chuckle.
“thank you for defending me, but really, let them talk. they just want to get to you.”
“now they know what happens when they speak of you.”
there’s a brief moment of silence between you both; it’s comfortable.
rafe seems tired, and you really don’t want him to leave, but you know it’s not going to end well if he stays over.
it’s been over four months since the definitive breakup and you’ve tried to go no contact with rafe, but it’s hard because you live in the same place, you have the same friends and rafe never wanted to stop talking to you.
“i still feel like i need to protect you,” he says, breaking the silence.
you lay next to him, your faces being so close, your noses are almost touching. this is dangerous territory, but you don’t care at this point. you touch his cheek so softly, he closes his eyes again.
he leans in, trying to get to your lips, and they touch briefly, before you lean back, effectively rejecting his kiss.
“i think you should go.”
rafe stares at you, clearly hurt. he gets up from your couch and leaves.
if you could, you would do everything necessary to make this relationship work, but that means changing rafe completely, and you don’t know if you’re in love with rafe, or are resigned to the crumbs of kindness he gives you.
no relationship should survive on small moments of love, and you’re no longer satisfied by the thrill of having a good moment with rafe.
when you broke up with him, he begged you for another chance, but you had already given him a thousand chances. you’ve played this game before and you ended up hurt and slightly traumatized.
you can’t change rafe and he doesn’t want to help himself, so there’s nothing left for you to do.
i love feedback, tell me your thoughts! <3
#my writings#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron oneshot#rafe cameron imagine#outer banks#drew starkey#drew starkey x you#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey oneshot#drew starkey imagine
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𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍’ 𝐍 𝐂𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍’
𝐀/𝐍: here's what you've all been waiting for . . . more preschool!sukuna !! — as thanks for 1000+ followers — also, also, big thanks to @domainofmarie and @beyond-your-stars for the idea !
𝐖/𝐂: around 1.7k
When you first met Sukuna, you thought he was a strawberry incarnate. Maybe it was his hair — which you were shocked to find out was natural, maybe it was his eyes — that seemingly glowed maroon whenever he was even slightly vexed, or maybe, just maybe, it was the way his pale skin turned a cute shade of salmon whenever you looked his way. In any case, you stood by your decision. — Sukuna was a strawberry.
And, if you thought hard enough, you would remember the times where you used to try and eat Sukuna. Yes, you read that right. Sometimes you would go up to your friend, grab one of his cheeks in your hands, and chomp!
Unfortunately, you did get in trouble one or two times, not because Sukuna told on you — he would never even think of doing such a thing, — but because Sukuna walked around all day with a bite mark engraved on his cheek.
You actually haven’t stopped this deed of yours. It’s become a habit, or an addiction, as Sukuna called it. But he didn’t mind. He never did. Not if it was about you.
But what he did mind, was, when people would try to take your attention off of him.
For instance, right now. You were seated beside Sukuna on the bus, and in the midst of trying to take a bite of your strawberry, whilst said strawberry was just staring out the window, letting you give your best efforts. [No, he did not give you the window seat.] Out of the blue, another one of your classmates approaches your row.
“Hey, guys! Can I sit next to you—?”
“This seat is taken.” Sukuna swiftly turns to face the boy and gestures towards the empty spot on your left. Albeit it was obviously not occupied, Sukuna didn’t even try to make up a better excuse.
“Umm, it’s actually—”
“Taken. It’s actually taken.”
Due to Sukuna’s unwavering glare, and clearly irked expression on his face, the boy clumsily shuffled away.
“‘Kuna,” you started, in that soft tone of yours — which never failed to lift his spirits, “he just wanted to sit down with us. And—and, no one’s sitting there anyway. Lying’s bad.”
“Yeah, well,” he huffed. “Next time I won’t lie, then. I’ll tell him he can’t sit next to you.”
“You mean ‘us’?”
“I mean what I said.”
“You’re the most confusing strawberry ever.”
Sukuna rolled his eyes, feigning annoyance.
Unfortunately, or fortunately, the strawberry did not get less confusing once you two arrived at your destination . . . the zoo!
Your teachers had originally planned to separate the class into two groups — in order to avoid chaos — but, when they noticed you and Sukuna already holding hands, they refrained from their decision of splitting you two up. They knew it would always end up being a battle they couldn’t win, no matter how hard they tried. Sukuna would never let go. And you, being you, wouldn’t let go either.
“Hey, Sukuna! Can you hold my hand? Those animals are scaring me.” A girl asked, once your group had reached the lion enclosure. You turned your head and saw the girl stick out her tongue at you. You frowned.
“Out of my way,” Sukuna elbowed her, sending her stumbling, “we—she wants to see the pandas.” Sukuna managed to successfully drag you a few feet away from your classmates before your teachers spotted the little attempt at “escape” and reprimanded you two, leading you guys back to the rest of the group.
Sukuna frowned, yet his grip on your hand never ceased. However, the frown soon flipped upside down, when your teacher guided the group over to the pandas. Sukuna noticed a growing smile on your lips, and hid his own, turning slightly away.
You pointed at the pandas behind the glass wall, “‘Kuna, look! They’re so cute! Aww, I want one as a pet.”
“Yeah? Then you’d have to clean up all their poop. Look at how big they are, and just imagine the size of their poop. It must be equal in ratio, y’know.”
You stifled a giggle behind your free hand, “Okay. Then . . . I would just make you clean up the poop and take care of the hard stuff. And I’ll do everything else.”
“Sure.”
You jumped up and down fervently, continuing to grasp his hand all the while. “Really? Yay!”
“Whatever.” Sukuna turned away from you, again, and worked hard to contain his laughter. You just looked so . . .
“Over here, everyone! Come this way,” your teacher yelled, making you guys continue on your way. “I meant everyone, Sukuna. Don’t stop your friend from listening to the teacher, didn’t I tell you? Wouldn’t want to leave you guys behind.”
Sukuna sighed, yet obeying nonetheless.
As your class left the animals encased behind glass walls, you passed by another enclosure on your way out. — A group of turtles.
You let go of Sukuna and ran up to the glass, pressing your face against it, not noticing the way your breath fogged up the glass. You gasped, loudly. “Woah! They’re all such pretty colors—ah!”
Sukuna pulled you back just as fast as the turtle came near the glass and banged on it with its flipper.
“What happened?” Your teacher asked, in a tone full of genuine concern.
“The sea turtle, it—it attacked me.” You pointed at said animal.
“No, it didn’t. You’re just being dramatic. It was behind the glass.”
Miss Wells’s eyes flickered between you two as you and Sukuna argued and bickered over what happened. When she realized nothing serious occured, she backed away. It was funny, she had to admit. The two of you were fighting while still holding hands.
“Hmph! It did attack me.”
“It didn’t even touch you.”
“Yes, it did.”
“Sure, sure.”
“Uh huh.”
Sukuna, this time, didn’t bother hiding his laugh when a gorilla beat its chest and you jolted in your position. But, he didn’t forget to squeeze your hand, assuring you nothing was going to hurt you. Not if he was there.
The rest of the day was spent seeing alligators, tigers, spiders, snakes, you name it. And, although you did get a little spooked a few times, you couldn’t deny you were totally bummed when your teacher announced the field trip was over. You didn’t even get to see your favorite animal yet.
As for Sukuna? He couldn’t deny he was totally bummed seeing you look so upset.
When your group rendezvoused with the other half of the class and loaded onto the bus, Sukuna helped you put on your coat, as the weather had decreased drastically.
You leaned your head on your strawberry’s shoulder. “‘Kuna,” you sighed, clearly exhausted after a whole day of fun.
“Hm?” He pushed a strand of hair out of your eyes and tucked it behind your ear.
“Why are you still holding my hand?” Albeit you were tired, you were never too tired to giggle.
“. . .So you don’t get lost. Duh.” It took Sukuna quite a bit of time to think of a decent answer.
“But, we’re on a bus. How would I get lost?”
“You never know.”
“You’re such a dummy. It’s literally impossible.”
“You’re pretty good at doing impossible things.” — Like, making his heart race, running through his mind all day long, giving him a feeling other than anger. You were a master at doing impossible feats.
“Shut up.”
“Oh yeah? If I shut up, then, how would I be able to give you . . . this!” Sukuna pulled out a stuffed plushie of your favorite animal of all time from behind his back, as if he had been waiting for this moment all his life. And, maybe he was. You never know, right?
“Sukuna!” You gasped. Reaching out your hands in a ‘gimme, gimme’ manner.
“Not even a ‘please’? Not even a ‘thank you’?” Sukuna teased.
However, he didn’t have much to say once you leaned over and placed a wet kiss on his cheek, making a ‘mwah!’ sound as you did so. "Thank you, thank you! — So much!"
Sukuna touched his cheek with his hand, his face immediately reddening. All the while, you took your chance and snatched the plushie out of his arms, quickly cuddling it to your chest.
“When did you even get this?”
“. . .” He was broken, absolutely stupefied, and unable to speak.
“‘Kuna?”
“Oh, what? What did you say?”
“I said, ‘when did you get this’?” You repeated, still entirely focused on the animal in your arms.
“Right. . . I got it when you were in the bathroom. Spent all my money on it. I didn’t know gift shops were so expensive.” He scratched the back of his head.
“Of course it would be expensive, silly! It’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen!"
He smiled. “I beg to differ.”
Taglist: @beyond-your-stars @sad-darksoul @mochimoee @r0ckst4rjk @lillycore @deepchromatose @yinyinyinyinyinyin @fivehoneyharg @desihopelessromantic @taiyakii @hannas16 @acroso @msvalsius @call-memissbrightside @kelerina-ballerina @emikokomura
#sukuna x reader#sukuna x you#ryomen x reader#jjk x reader#jjk x you#sukuna fluff#preschool!sukuna au
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I need some fluffy megumi hcs 😌 can you write how he would act as a boyfriend?? I love your work ❤️ also, can i claim the 🐦🔥 emoji for your anon list??
Ummm of course!!!! Thank you for reading my works ❤️ it means the world, really! Welcome to the list pheonix anon 💕
Masterlist
Cw; pg 13, fluffy megumi, boyfriend megumi being a dork.
- megumi is definitely the kind of boyfriend that goes along with any silly hobby you pick up.
- like when you went to that crocheting class together. He had no idea what was going on but happily watched you make little crochet animals. He keeps the little demon dog figures you made for him in his room and close to his heart. He cherishes your little quirks and gifts no matter how small.
- takes pictures of you whenever he gets the chance. Megumi has a whole photo album dedicated to pictures he’s taken of you on dates, pictures of you laying around the house. You just look so beautiful all the time. When he’s away on missions and needs the extra motivation he’ll look at the pictures he took, warming his heart and filling him with courage.
- Megumi is 100% a crash dummy. Anybody that looks at you or touches you less than respectfully irritates him. He always gets ready to square up, he doesnt care how big of a scene he’s making. He doesnt play bout you.
- goes along on any shopping trips you go on and carries all your bags
- cooks for you and keeps your apartment looking tidy whenever he comes over, so that when you come home from work you can just relax and embrace each other.
- loves when you play in his hair and tell him about your day. Despite being a dog person his personality mirrors a cat. He’ll lean into your touch, and you swear he would be purring if he could.
- he does skincare with you, lets you put all kinds of face masks on him. Sometimes he even falls asleep under your gentle care.
- super soft spoken with you, and so patient when you have an attitude or having a bad day.
- wouldn’t admit to it but he adopted Gojo’s habit of bringing you home souvenirs and gifts from his missions.
- hates leaving you alone, he always leaves you with one of his dogs when he has to be away for long. He knows the dangers of being a sorcerer. He would never forgive himself if something happened to you.
- confides in you about his troubles and frustrations. Around you he feels safe, and is able to express himself freely without care.
- insists on you guys going to this local cafe he always used to go to before he met you.
- hand feeds you pieces of his croissant, insisting you try it with your coffee.
- super cuddly when you guys are alone, but in public he prefers to keep it lowkey.
- pecks, hand holding, playing footsies, his favorite thing to do is link pinkies with you as you walk.
- recommends books to you, sometimes even reading them aloud to help you fall asleep.
- overall a very attentive boyfriend. He makes sure you have everything you need, using Gojo’s card whenever you want something (the Gojo effect).
I love Megumi so much yawll dont understaaaand. Hopefully you enjoyed this anon! :> notes and reblogs are appreciated. Comments, asks, and submissions are welcomed 💗
#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk megumi#megumi fluff#megumi x reader#megumi fushiguro#megumi x you#megumi x y/n#❥iloveboysinred#{anonask ੈ✩‧₊˚ ฅ^. .^ฅ}
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I've seen a lot of "gifted kid burnout" posts and also a few "where do we go to post studyblr stuff when we're bad students and don't get good grades" so I'm here to talk about my own experience of "I've never been a gifted kid and I've never been a good student".
I'm not a gifted kid. In fact, there was no "gifted kid" system in my country at all. And instead of multiple choice questions or true or false questions, we had to memorize pages and pages of our textbook and write them down during three hour exams. You can't get "a" and "the" wrong or you lose points, that's how much memorization we had to do. We didn't get electives until our last two years of high school and the electives were "biology or economics?" Yeah, those were the only two. Even at my university, I didn't get to choose my own electives. Everything came in a neat little box that you can never escape. And we never, EVER get full marks in Burmese or English. 80 out of 100 is considered phenomenal and no one's ever gotten more than 82 in either subject. So our matriculation exam's full mark is 600 but the most you can get is 550.
Suffice to say, the education system sucked and I don't like memorization so my grades were 50% at most. I failed my math and physic classes with 28 marks out of 100 for a whole two years, only barely passing on midterms and end of year exams. For my matriculation exam I got 340 out of 600, which is SUBPAR. That's 2.0 GPA btw. I never thought of myself as educated or a good student and I still don't.
But I love languages and I realize that while languages seem hard to learn and have strict rules, they actually don't. You can move them around and learn them however you like. So as an avid reader, I started learning languages so that I will be able to read books in those languages and I found studying liberating. Why not? I'm no longer memorizing 600 pages of text book and writing them down.
I realize that I love learning and studying when I get to choose what I learn. So I stopped caring about grades and started learning things that I love. Hey, do you know what's the biggest side effect of learning things that you love and not caring about grades? It's that you actually start to learn and your grades start to come up. I realize I perform badly when I am stressing out about my grades. This is why you're seeing all my 100% grade and 80% grade all over my walls. It's not because I'm a good student. It's because I've let go of the notion that I HAVE to be a good student.
I can talk about my bad grades as freely as I can talk about my good grades. I can tell you that I've been learning Japanese for ten seven years and I'm only JLPT N3 level. Honestly, you know what? As a generation, we're due to appreciate our process and progress instead of our achievements. It's fine if you're a bad student. It's fine if you are a gifted kid who fell off the wagon. It's fine if you've never been a gifted kid or a bad student. What matters is you're here studying and learning and appreciating yourself for doing all that.
So post your good grades, post your bad grades. Post your good stuff and bad stuff and messy notes. Post about your good days and your bad days. Talk about your productive days and talk about your rest days. Keep going and keep learning!
#studyblr#langblr#spanish#100 days of productivity#chinese language#japanese language#chinese studyblr#chinese langblr#japanese studyblr#korean language#korean studyblr
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Fic Finder
May 2nd
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1. I'm trying to re-find a fic that is a bit of a crossover between TGCF and MDZS but with Wei Wuxian reincarnated as Xie Lian with all of his memories intact, Lan Wangji was reincarnated as Hua Cheng but didn't have memories of his past life. Hua Cheng, Mu Qing, Feng Xin later reacts to Xie Lian's past life as Wei Wuxian after an accident. I'm really searching for this fic everywhere but I can't find it:: It's totally fine if you can recommend anything close to what I'm looking for if possible ^^ @daily333
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2. Hi, thank you so much for offering this service. It’s certainly appreciated!
I wanted to find two fics if that is okay.
A) The plot of the first fic: LWJ is a controversial singer. He’s known for his explicit music videos, and is openly gay. I think the fic author was representing the mindset of early 2000’s. His manager is Jiāng Yanli, they both bonded over WWX, who’s presumed dead but is missing. It��s also LWJ fucks. He has sex with various people, one of them being his background dancer but he doesn’t date anyone because he’s in love with WWX. WWX is actually living in hiding, (from Meng Yao). He returns and LWJ and him get together. There’s a whole car chase scene as well when he goes back to get Yuan and the rest of the Wens with Jiang Cheng.
B) The second fic, I don’t remember much from it except a scene that’s been nagging me. It’s a WangXian getting back together fic. Basically WWX returns and while LWJ doesn’t give into him right away, they still end up getting back together. LWJ had a hard time with WWX leaving. The scene that I’m referring to is in which Lwj comes home, and wwx mentions to him he and LXC spoke. LWJ panics because he’s afraid wwx will leave him again and I recall the dialogue being something along the lines of
“No, he had no right” or “he doesn’t get to take you away from me again” he starts crying I think.
WWX calms him down by saying he’s never leaving him again no matter what, even if LXC wouldn’t approve he doesn’t care for others and the only one who matters is LWJ.
Thats about it. Thank you for all your hard work! Xx
2A)
FOUND? always on my mind by sami (E, 42k, WangXian, LWJ/Other(s), LWJ & JYL, Modern, references to past Lan Wangji/others, references to past WWX/WQ, Family, Sexual Tension, set in the early 90s, Grief, Erratic Gay Superstar Musician LWJ, life is what happens in the in between, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Children, Pregnancy, not mpreg, Parenthood, Music Videos, LWJ's Gremlin Tendencies, WWX's Gremlin Tendencies, Drag, Daytime Television, Bitches Get Things Done, fictional daytime talk shows, Q&A, Slice of Life, Awards, shows, any resemblance between OCs and real people living or dead are coincidental, Communication, and how LWJ is bad at it, LWJ's weirdly wholesome kink inclinations, LWJ's aggressively artistic musical career, References to Major Character Death, Celebrity stuff)
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3. I read this ff one time from sizhui pov. it’s essentially about lwj in mourning clothes during wwx death . he’s commenting on the color of the robes being white and how there’s no blue. I have never been able to find it again. it;s short, maybe one or two chapters.
I do remember a scene where sizhui asks Lxc about the robes and xichen responds “he used to wear blue, sizhui, like me” — may not be the exact quote but something similar.
Thanks yall! @chenqingmagic
FOUND? In all these shades of blue (I think we found you) by Fleetling (T, 5k, WangXian, LSZ & LWJ, LSZ & WWX & LWJ, LSZ & LJY, LXC & LWJ, LXC & LSZ, 5+1 Things, LSZ pov, kinda sad at times bc wwx is dead for most of it, LSZ's childhood, LSZ growing up, LSZ isn't stupid he worked out who his father lost long before wwx came back, LJY is a Good Friend, LXC is a good uncle ok, the juniors get wangxian together at the end, minor injuries and blood but better than canon, a reflection on LWJ's clothing from the pov of LSZ)
FOUND? Revolution by mrcformoso (T, 8k, WangXian, LSZ & LWJ, LSZ & WWX, LSZ/LJY, Light Angst, Happy Ending, POV LSZ, Found Family, Toxic Elders, Fatherhood, Growing Up, The Lan Juniors, LSZ's parents suffered, And so he starts a revolution, Bringing about change, LWJ Adopts LSZ; WWX is LSZ's Parent, LSZ is a polite menace, Hanguang-jun raised an army of Lan rebels, and we're here for it, Canon Compliant, Canon Divergence, only the ending because we all hate the untamed edning, Good Uncle WN)
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4. Hi so i was looking for a wangxian fic it was a non modern mpreg fic where wwx got pregnant and had to visit some physical whom he became like friends with and lwj and lqr were there too, I honestly don't think it was omegaverse. Sorry this is all i remember but i do remember one rough line from the fic which was a convo b/w lwj, wwx and the physician the physician was asking lwj and wwx about their sex life and how often they do it so lwj responded with everyday and then the physician asked if he pulls out or smth but lwj said no i hope u can find it :> (sorry for lack of details) @monochromo
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5. Hi!! I'm looking for a fic where it's a modern au and wei wuxian gets ill when fierce corpses start spreading (almost like an apocalypse) and he gets accused of it. He ends up doing a video call (I think) with other sect leaders to explain how demonic cultivation works so they can stop the apocalypse. I know that lan wangji takes care of wei wuxian while he's sick if that helps. Thank you !!
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6. So I’m trying to find this fix where the wens we’re going to sacrifice themselves and Wen Qing throws her needles at Wèi wuxian but he like stops them somehow and is angry(?) and he creates like a impenetrable(?) barrier and keeps the there. @candyyii
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7. Fic Finder ask here, I’m looking for a fic set in the cloud recesses study arc era, it’s cannon divergent and WWX & LWJ get together during cloud recesses, I think they’re engaged as well. This fic is also a long fic. The only concrete scene I can place to this fic was WWX & LWJ having horny teen semi clothed sex in the woods where WWX is on LWJ’s lap and they’re found by NHS who clearly thinks he just walked in on them kissing and thought it was fine for them to be doing that, he just felt awkward walking in on them doing it. (So this is another point into the maybe they’re married of fiancés @ that moment in the story) I can’t remember the name of the fic, and it’s haunting me.
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8. I’m looking for a yiling wei sect au that had wen cheng’s girlfriend as a double agent helping to end the war, and she ended up with wen Qing. @sentient-halloween-candy
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9. Hi, does anyone remember seeing a fic where lwj shows up on wwx's doorstep out of the blue. They hadn't seen each other in a while & lwj escaped from somewhere, like he was being kept in a lab maybe for experimenting & went straight to wwx for help. I think it might have been b/c he was pregnant, maybe it was an a/b/o fic?
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10. I'm looking for a particular fic- I think an arranged marriage/immortal Wei Wuxian au, wherein he saved Luo Qingyang, Jin Zixuan and Lan Wangji from the Xuanwu cave, then returned them to the clans a while later and asked for/orchestrated Lan Wangji's hand in marriage? Thank you @kedaliya
FOUND? inevitable everything by isabilightwood (E, 193k, WangXian, MM/WQ, JYL/JZX, BSSR/LY, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Canon Divergence, YLLZ WWX, but WWX is BSSR's disciple/adoptive grandson too, the cultivation sects think this is a, War Prize AU, it's actually self-arranged marriage, Arranged Marriage, yin iron shenanigans, LWJ Has Friends, Mutual Pining, Pining while fucking, LWJ Has a Yiling Laozu Kink, Switch WangXian, BDSM, Submissive LWJ, Dominant WWX, Angst with a Happy Ending, magical illness of a side character (who will get better), Rope Bondage, Impact Play, Rimming, Bottom LWJ, Temperature Play, Face-Fucking, Breathplay, (talisman-based breathplay to be specific), Cock Warming, Public Scene, no one gets naked in public this is the sense of wwx invents the, Remote Controlled Vibrator, Semi-Public Sex, Outdoor Sex, Blindfolds, one qingmian smut scene with oral and fingering, Minor Character Death, All Sex Scenes Are Skippable!)
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11. Hello! Im trying to find a fix it fic where wei ying dresses as a lady and ends up faking his death with the help of jiang yanli and jiang cheng. A significant moment i remember is that jin guangshan tries to come onto him before jin zixuan intervenes. If you could help me find it, id be very grateful!
FOUND? FOUND? Wei Wuxian, Who’s That? by bumbledees (T, 48k, wangxian, crossdressing, pining, sibling feels)
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12. Hi! For Fic Finder: I am looking for a canon-era fic where Wei Wuxian was some kind of god or divine being and the thing I remember is that he had to bond with a demon/beast-man to balance his divinity(?). Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan came to him as an example of one such duo: Song Lan was the demon half and he explained that the demons make a contract with the god to protect the god in life and then the demon gets to eat the god’s body after death. The thought of getting eaten scared WWX. I am pretty sure this fic took place during the Sunshot Campaign because WWX was fighting through some war and he was unbalanced because he hadn’t found his other half. I could also have this flip flopped and maybe LWJ was the divine one and WWX was the demon half? If anyone remembers this fic I would love to find it again! Thank you!
Hi again, I just sent in a fic finder ask about a divine WWX having to bond with a demon? I think I might have gotten two fics confused: a war fic and a religion fic. WWX might have been taken to a monastery and raised there as a mythic figure that the other sects come on pilgrimage to worship, and he is raised being told he has to bond with a dark spirit? Sorry for the mix up, but could you please add this to my previous ask? If the fics are one and the same, great! If they are two separate, does anyone recognize them? Thanks again! @gloriousclotpole
FOUND? So You Accidentally Kidnapped A Qilin by Mikkeneko (T, 83k, WangXian, Juuni Kokki | Twelve Kingdoms Fusion, mdm yu’s a+ parenting, Identity Issues, Cultivator Politics, Yin Iron Poisoning, Twin Prides of Yúnmèng Feels, Yunmeng Bros Reconciliation, WWX Needs a Hug, Mutual Pining, Miscommunication, Getting Together, Temporary Character Death, Happy Ending, Pacifist WWX, MXTX Big Bang 2021)
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13. Hi, I once read this amazing mdzs fic on ao3 in which whole lan clan wasn't human, they were some kind of aliens I think, it was a secret. I would love to read it again but I can't find it @iknowitsgonnabelonely
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14. looking for a fic where wangxian are already in an arranged marriage thats set in modern day. wei ying had a huge crush on lan zhan but on the wedding gay he thinks he hears lan zhan confess his feelings for someone else. this causes him to be unable to relax during sex
FOUND? A Marriage Story by DeviyudeThoolika (E, 38k, WangXian, Sex is complicated, Angst, Pining while fucking, Mature elements., Mutual Pining, Arranged Marriage, Sort Of, Misunderstandings, of epic proportions)
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15. Hi, thank you for all you do! I’m looking for a fic where WWX is feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders - I think he went back in time and was trying to fix things by himself - and the jiangs weren’t great but then WWX has a breakdown in the courtyard and was like, I’m so tired, I can’t do this anymore, and even madame yu softens at that when they realize the burdens he was carrying and he starts to get support going forward. @vi-sky
FOUND? 🧡 (Un)Hidden truth by Sarah_R (M, 207k, WIP, WangXian, characters watching their show, characters watching the future, Time Travel Fix-It, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Suicidal Thoughts, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Nightmares, Self-Harm, fluff, Angst, LWJ best husband, WWX needs all the love and hugs in the world, and he gets it, WWX Protection Squad, The juniors are literally the light of the show, WQ best sister, YZY & JFM will realize what an absolute shit they’ve been, Character Development, Sentient Burial Mounds, Everyone Lives AU, Except the people who deserve to)
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16. hello there, i'm trying to find a fic where wwx and sizhui were both kidnapped together but lwj found them through tailsmans (i think) then wwx tells lwj that those bad people touched him and lwj gets mad (or possessive ig) thank you!
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17. Hi! I'm trying to find a fic I read where in the present day Lan Huan & Lan Zhan are at a cultivation conference. They're walking back to their hotel when ancient fantasy China Wei Ying falls out of nothing and lands on the pavement right in front of them. It turns out, Wei Ying fell off the cliff at Nightless City but instead of dying, he somehow ended up 600 years into the present. I remember that the Lan brothers immediately help him - he's fascinated & freaked out by modern life at first (both the hotel elevator & modern plumbing in particular). Um, a lot of cultivation history has been lost over time & i think WY helps with that. I also remember it turns out that Lan Zhan is the reincarnation of original LZ. I think that several other characters were reincarnated also & Mo Xuanyu is another person who somehow time-traveled to the present. I know it ended up Wangxian. I think there's a sequel where they eventually adopt A-Yuan & a little girl who is Yanli reincarnated. Please help! I can't remember the fic name & all my keyword searching hasn't worked out.
Thanks very much! @emrinalex
FOUND? 忘不了你的爱 (can’t forget your love) by PorcupineGirl (G, 25k, WangXian, Time Travel, Modern with Magic, Modern Cultivators AU, Canon Divergence, Time Traveler WWX, discussion of canonical character deaths, a whole lot of handwaving, conveniently localized fires, Discussion of Canonical Suicide Attempt, mostly happy but slightly bittersweet ending)
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18. Hi! i have been trying to look for a fic that I forgot for quite a while. The thing is, i am not sure if it is a threadfic OR an ao3 fic. The only thing that I could remember was wwx and lwj was travelling together, possibly on a honeymoon after their wedding; arrange marriage. or they could just be going on a night hunt ToT the biggest premise of this was that lwj was undeniable attracted to wwx and took a peek of him while bathing and wwx was so smug because he knew he would look. @freshmilk-00
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19. Okay so there's a fic I read when I first got into MDZS about two years ago and the memory of it suddenly hit me like a truck and I /need/ to reread but I cannot, for the life of me, find it. I've gone through what feels like 100 pages of my history on a03 without luck so here I am. Okay, as far I can remember, It was still a WIP when I read it roughly two years ago, but that was two years ago so I could be wrong. Anyway, it was a time travel fic but /not/ because of canon events.
However, it was canon complacent. Basically, sometime after the end of the series, there was some really bad demonic (?) event that killed most of the world, including LWJ. WWX hadn't reached immortality but he had reached the next level of cultivation, and therefore now had a perfect memory. I know there was one scene where he realized he'd hit that breakthrough (and I think broke down?) because he was recreating the ancestral plates of the Lan and realized he knows every name even if he shouldn't.
Anyway, in this future, the remaining cultivators are able to link together to sort of super boost their cultivation? (Idk if that's the best description) and tie it to both Wei Wuxian and Wen Ning, who send their consciousnesses back in time to... I think it's when they were at the Gusu lectures. (I do not remember if this was novel or cql verse).
They gather the world (Minus Wen Ruohan and his people) to tell the story of the future but using titles people wouldn't yet have (like Yiling Patriarch. Ghost General. Headshaker. Lianfang-zun as examples) to tell the story without giving away identities (Though Wen Ning does introduce himself as the Ghost General at some point during that, giving away that identity). There's also truth talisman they wear while telling the story to prove its all true. Anyway I know this is long but I figured the more details I remembered, the better. Even if it is still WIP I just wanna reread what's there so badly.
FOUND? If You Forget Me by DivideTheSorrow (Not Rated, 189k, WangXian, JYL/JZX, YZY/JFM, WIP, Time Travel, Fix-It of Sorts, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Build, Relationship(s), Canon Divergence, Eventual Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, POV Alternating, Original Character(s), Angst)
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20. hellooo! hope you all are having a good day<33 I'm looking for a fic where wwx is cursed to not see people unless he believes they love them (?) I remember that the juniors were there and so was lwg and jc. thank you <33 @val-ley
FOUND? See Me, Feel Me (Listening to You) by Ghost_Honey (T, 29k, WangXian, POV WWX, WWX Needs a Hug, WWX’s Abyssmal Self-Esteem, Emotional Healing, Angst, The Juniors love their Senior Wei, Curses, WWX is an Unreliable Narrator, JC & WWX Reconciliation, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Platonic Cuddling)
~*~
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where I've been
hello friends! it's me!
I know my presence has been really hit or miss over the past year and change. if you want the short version, life has just been really tough, but I'm at the point where I really want to feel like life feels more normal again, which includes writing and posting and being more active.
if you'd like the deluxe edition of what's been going on, I do feel like I want to share what's been happening. it's been really rough and the next steps are only going to be more difficult, so knowing I have friends rooting for me will really help.
you don't have to read if you don't want to, it's kind of a bummer! the biggest takeaway is that I've been going through a garbage time but I want to start writing regularly again, so hopefully you'll see a lot more of me moving forward.
everything else below the cut!
tw: pregnancy, pregnancy loss
okay so. y'all know I got married in December 2022 (and we are still very happily married!!). we've known from the getgo that we want a family, but hadn't quite pulled the trigger.
well, there was another situation that happened that made me realize that I really wanted to start trying now, but it also unlocked a really deep trauma. when I was 23 I was in a really horrible relationship, and I got pregnant. and I ended up miscarrying pretty early on. and I got zero support. that's the short version.
I ended up, I guess for my own sanity, blocking it out. there's big gaps in my memory that just. don't exist. and for a long time I told myself it didn't happen. later, when I acknowledged that it did happen, I told myself that it was for the best, that I would have been a bad mother at that point in my life, that I would have had to maintain contact with my ex, that it just wasn't the right time and it was a good thing that I lost my baby.
the problem was I never grieved. I never healed. it was all just locked away and festering and killing me slowly.
so I ended up spending a good part of last year grieving and trying to deal with pain that I should have dealt with years ago. which...let me tell you, it's a rough process.
and at the same time, I realized that I wanted to start trying. my whole life I've wanted to be a mom. I've wanted five kids for as long as I can remember. Every time I pictured the future I pictured children. And I didn't want to wait anymore. which...is extra complicated to start that process when you're also in the midst of unpacking trauma.
and as you might have guessed...I'm not pregnant yet.
I'm very lucky that my work has a great medical program and they don't have waiting periods to see fertility specialists, so I started seeing doctors last April. And there's nothing wrong. I've done bloodwork, I've done ultrasounds, I've done so many tests, Shane has been tested. We've done three medicated cycles with trigger shots. They can't find anything wrong. They keep shrugging and saying that it's just the matter of the right time.
Unexplained infertility is a bitch.
It's so painful. It's so unfair. And because of my job I'm constantly doing orders for pregnancy announcements and gender reveals and baby's first Christmas. I cannot tell you how many times I've run to the bathroom to cry because I just can't handle being surrounded by reminders that I'm not anybody's mother yet.
I'm currently on cycle 17 of trying. which. that on its own hurts so much. s e v e n t e e n.
we have to hold off on starting the next steps because Shane lost his job (which is another absolutely insane stressor) but he's in a new job that he loves and pays better, and I'm getting a referral for a new clinic for a second opinion. but it looks like we're going to move forward with IVF.
I'm very very lucky that my work will pay for a significant amount towards IVF, but there's still payments we have to make, so we're working on getting our ducks in a row. and it's a terrifying prospect. medications and egg retrieval (my first surgery ever) and transfers. and the crippling fear that they won't get enough eggs or none of them will fertilize or the transfer won't be successful. it's eating me away. I've been feeling like such a shell of myself, every failed cycle feels like another piece of me has faded away.
right now I'm trying to focus on getting myself in as healthy as a place as possible, emotionally and physically, before we start procedures. am I still hoping that I'll get pregnant without IVF? oh, desperately. but at this point, nearly a year and a half into trying, this is probably going to be our best bet.
so moving forward, I'm hoping I can start doing things that make me happy again. I've spent most of the past year and a half being incredibly depressed and not really doing anything other than laying around in bed. I did discover Lockwood & Co thanks to Maeve, and that's helped so much because it gave me something new to think about and fixate on (and write for), but it's still been rough and sporadic. which, actually, is a good describer of how the past year has gone. I need to get back into living again.
in the meantime thank you for everybody who's checked in on me, especially QuiddoDitto. I haven't really had the energy to message back, but I've seen the comments and messages and it's meant so much to me while I slog through this.
hopefully things will get better soon! hopefully I start feeling like a person again! hopefully I'll be writing and posting regularly because I miss it!
and hopefully there'll be a baby in my arms soon.
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Socks on the floor
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you.”
That’s how today’s Gospel starts. Jesus is telling us that there’s the world’s version of peace. And then there’s God’s version.
The world’s version of peace is the kind you and I get when there’s a break in the action. Two things about that kind of peace.
One – it doesn’t last. You and I know this. Sometimes we even call it “a moment’s peace.”
Two – whether we worked hard for it, or it just happened, it’s fragile. It will be wiped away by the next thing that happens.
Because the world’s version of peace is the peace of the finished task. The peace of the sleeping child. The peace of the cancelled meeting.
It’s not a question of whether that peace will end. It’s just a matter of how and when.
It’s a peace that cannot last. Because it’s just a break in the action.
And because it is just a break in the action, it’s never there when you and I need it most – when we’re right in the middle of things.
Especially things like death, divorce, addiction, illness, job loss. The hard things.
So, what’s God’s version of peace?
God’s version of peace – is peace in right in the middle of things. Even the hard things.
The difference between God’s peace and the world’s is the source.
God’s peace doesn’t come from a break in the action. God’s peace comes from making a place for God in our lives.
God freely pours out His peace for all of us. But you and I have to be smart enough to take it.
To do that, we have to build habits of peace.
That is, we have to intentionally build places within our lives, within our routine, and within ourselves to be with God.
We can have set times for Bible reading and prayer.
We can have landmarks (places, images, things we do, etc.) that we us to call us to God.
We can have moments and feelings (good, bad, or indifferent) that we turn into calls to prayer.
It can be as formal or informal as we like.
Whatever we do, we have to actually do it. And it has to lead us to a spiritual place.
But we can’t treat that place like grandma’s house. A place we only go to for Christmas or when someone dies.
We can’t treat that place like a storm shelter. A place we only run to when we hear the tornado sirens.
That place has to be our home. The place we live in, every day.
And you and I have to really live in that place of God’s peace.
Until there are dishes in the sink and socks on the floor.
Until you and I are talking with God – taking things to God in prayer, telling God all about all of it, seeking God’s will for the big things and the small stuff – talking with God like our dearest friend.
Not just while we’re reading the Bible or saying our prayers, but in the middle of everything.
Even while we’re dropping our socks on the floor.
Today’s Readings
#Peace#God's peace#Peace in the middle of things#Habits#Socks#God#Jesus#Catholic#Christian#Church#Catholicism#Moments Before Mass
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Can I request Mammon reacting to Reader who is always scolding him for being rude in general especially he said only he can save him or she should die but she would defend him whenever he's wronged or persuade Lucifer to change his punishment for something more suitable for his actions? He tried to befriend her multiple times while still being rude & dishonest that she snapped at him that he either be honest with her or leave her alone? With a happy ending please!
His Usual Tactics {Mammon}
A/n: thank you for requesting, I hope you like it.
I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL DEFENDING MAMMON AND NEVER AND I MEAN NEVER DEFENDING THE REST OF THE BROTHERS WHEN IT COMES TO DEALING WITH HIS BEHAVIOUR AND TRAUMA.
Pairing: Mammon x fem!reader
Trigger Warning:
A small warning about the demon who was supposed to protect you would have been nice; though judging from the rest of the brothers' reactions, you should have expected how everything would eventually play out.
Things in the beginning were awkward, for you at least. Mammon would often ignore you, sometimes taunt you because of your human lineage and the list went on. At first you thought it was just you, but you soon found out that he was like that with pretty much everyone.
But not once during the time you were staying in the Devildom had he left you behind. You had to give it to him, he never forgot about you. He was always on time -if being exact thirteen minutes late could be considered on time- and overall, despite his bad behaviour, he was attentive and present when the others weren't that much.
This was the sole reason why whenever Lucifer called him to his office to punish him, you would usually try to deal with the demon of pride for a better punishment; a more lenient one. More often than not, he had gotten away from being strapped to the ceiling in exchange of cleaning up everyone's bathrooms. Was this more pleasant? You couldn't really tell but you definitely slept better at nights knowing that the brothers weren't picking on him while he was upside down.
Unlike him, whenever something bothered you, you spoke up and this had led to many late nights staying up with him, dissing the entire Devildom. Those somewhat rare moments were the best moments in the Devildom for you.
Because, you see, Mammon was never calm. It seemed as if it was in his nature to be snappy and rude and mean and he always snapped at you, never apologising unless told so by Lucifer.
From his point of view, however, Mammon was trying. He was doing his best to prove himself to Lucifer that he could carry out any task no matter the difficulty level. In this situation the task was protecting you.
And at the end of the day, having tolerated his brothers and their behaviour for so many years (after their fall to the Devildom), all he knew was being mean and rude. Plus, sometimes the stress of gambling and being caught by Lucifer was too much.
Every night though, Mammon made it a goal to go over the day in his head. Not everything, just the important parts which always included you and where did he go wrong during gambling.
Tonight was no different and after he kicked off his shoes, he allowed himself to fall back on his white couch since the three steps walk from the couch to the bed was a bit too much for him. Today's events were no different: him taking the ice cream from your hands because he couldn't quite tell you that he had read on one of Satan's books that too much ice cream was no good for humans, him telling you that the brown shirt you were trying on in the shop was the worst shirt he had ever seen since he couldn't really say that he preferred the light blue one you had tried earlier on...
It didn't take long for him to get angry. He couldn't understand why on Hell you couldn't realise that he cared for you and apart from his tiny tiny crush on you, he wanted to repay you for all the light punishments he had received this week. You were being so stubborn and had dared to even tell him to never talk to you again unless he was going to fix his behaviour.
Talking like that to the Great Mammon was almost a criminal offence in his mind.
And if you couldn't understand what he was saying, he would force you to understand.
Having changed in his grey sweatpants and white tank top, he rose from the couch and headed all the way to the library. Five minutes later, he was knocking on your door so impatiently he actually made it obvious that he was the one knocking.
"What?" You answered the door and it was painfully clear that he was the last demon you wanted to see today.
Without saying a word, he forced the book in your hands and took out his phone. "Go to page 4587 and read the last paragraph." He rolled his eyes.
Letting out a sigh, you leaned against the doorframe and searched for the page he told you. "Large amounts of sugar can result to rotten teeth..." You read out loud and then raised your eyes to look at him.
"This is you with the brown shirt and this is you with the blue shirt." He swiped between the two pictures Asmo had taken of you and had sent to the group chat. "You may not believe me human since Asmo is the one fixed on beauty and shit but I am the model in this family and brown? It wears you out."
You just blinked, unable to find an answer for him. Slowly, you stepped to the side and with a nod you urged him inside your room.
"What are ya going to scold me again?"
"You could have been a little nicer." You set the book on your desk and walked to the closet, taking out the light blue shirt. "The brown one was indeed hideous," you let out a chuckle and put the shirt back.
Mammon stood there a little confused. To begin with, he hadn't expected you to answer the door without him having to break in. And you weren't yelling at him, something that the past few days had become quite regular.
"My brothers will make fun of me." He finally said and took a seat on your bed. "It's not like I don't care about you human. That 300 Grimm you found yesterday? I placed them there but my point is... I am tired of being made fun of for... being me."
Before leaving that room, Mammon had made a deal with himself: he was the Great Mammon and if he were going to say something to you, he would do so while looking at you in the eyes. And he was actually doing just that.
"I can... tolerate that," you chuckled and sat next to him. "Only when we are in front of the others and without any harsh words."
"Nah... I'll just... tell them. I am their older brother and I deserve respect. I've done more than enough to earn it." Deciding that this was enough for the day and that he could always confess his actual love tomorrow, Mammon stood up and looked at you. "How about we steal Goldie again?"
"I'll cover for you."
Mammon wasn't mean and rude and you knew this. All those late nights you had spent with him had made you realise that he was far from that. He was sensitive, funny, energetic, fun to listen to and so much more than a gambling addict and all the other insults his brothers used on him.
You had forgiven him silently, in your head time and time again and you would continue to do so because there were times when he would slip up and apologise without realising it. Besides, he was making progress slowly but steadily and you loved being a witness to that.
#mammon x reader#mammon obey me x reader#mammon obey me#mammon x reader angst#mammon angst#obey me mammon#om! mammon#writing#anime and manga#anime#manga#obey me x reader#obey me shall we date#obey me shall we date x reader#obey me
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"Strap in, kid. You're not gonna want to miss this view." - Sgt. Hunter
I've seen a few others make a tribute post for the batch and I felt some words pulling at my chest.
I was a latecomer to the fandom, I binged season 1 & 2 in July of last year and it's been a wild ride since. I've laughed and cried and everything in between. It's hard to even articulate what this show means to me.
I began my Star Wars journey like many others, with the original trilogy at some point in childhood (you could consider me a zillenial). I liked them, but I was much more of a Harry Potter nerd at the time, my head was at Hogwarts. The prequels, however captured my heart. I don't remember when I first watched TCW, but it's very clear my heart belongs to the times of the Republic.
Like things often do, other fandoms have faded out of my peak interests, Harry Potter, Hunger Games and Maximum Ride to name a few, but any time I've come back to Star Wars, it feels like coming home. A galaxy far far away so vast and full of hope and love and grief and sorrow.
The last year has been far from easy. For the last few years, that feels like all we've been saying, huh? But in all seriousness, I really did loose myself in the past year, but oddly enough, Star Wars was a constant for me, it was an escape. I joined tumblr right after I binged season 1 & 2 of The Bad Batch and immediately fell in love with the wonderful world of fans and writers and artists here.
At first, I was a lurker, just a name that popped into the reblogs, but I began interacting more and more. I've brushed on this with a couple people (so sorry for repeating myself), but it was actually through reading fanfiction, that I came to terms with the fact that I needed to leave a 2.5 year relationship. It's not that I 'fell out of love' with them or anything, I just realized I didn't trust them as much as I should, I didn't want to share as much as I should, I wasn't being fulfilled in the ways I needed. And for that, fanfic authors, I thank you. Please never stop creating.
I also learned a lot about myself, get ready cause I'm about to get cheesy.
Hunter, you brought me a lot of comfort. I saw how heavy the wellbeing of your squad weighed on your shoulders. How you sacrificed and starved yourself, mentally and emotionally for their safety and benefit. I've lived that more times than I can count and with you, I didn't feel quite as alone in that experience. Even though we never talked, and we never will, I feel like you saw me.
Crosshair, you healed some of my faith in humanity. That people can change, they can see the error in their ways and turn against a system they just sort of slipped into. You reminded me that healing isn't linear, and that's okay. You reminded me that courage and bravery aren't the absence of fear, but they are going and facing the mountain despite every atom in your body telling you to turn the other way.
Echo, you reminded me it's okay to leave a group if your goals don't align. That it's not always an "in or out" situation. They can still be your family, people you rely on and who can rely on you even if you're not sharing bunks or meals anymore. You also reminded me that no matter how dire a situation is, or how grumpy you may be, a little humor goes a long way.
Wrecker, you reminded me that people's perception does not define who you are. You can be big and gentle. you can love explosions and destruction and still be very intuitive. You can take some time to process things and still be skilled and intelligent. You reminded me to take joy in the simple things, a Lula, some Mantel mix, an ice cone. Things are always a little better with a full belly.
Omega, you brought back some of my childlike innocence. You approached the galaxy with wide eyes full of wonder and always gave people the benefit of the doubt. You never lost hope. Even though you had to grow up too fast, you didn't let it break you, you still opened your heart to anyone who would see it.
Tech, dear Tech. You reminded me to never dull myself or apologize for being authentically me. That my interests and skills are a good thing, no matter how niche they are. That I shouldn't be embarrassed or feel annoying for my knowledge or my eagerness to share it. You reminded me that love and humor and kindness and connection come in all shapes and sizes.
I've also made friends in this fandom at a level I wasn't even expecting to. I've made connections beyond the galaxy of Star Wars and found love and support in amazing ways. I was pulled to create more than I have in a long time, writing, drawing, hell even building my own server.
For sake of not clogging people's notifications, fighting with Tumblr's tagging bugs, and inevitably forgetting to tag someone: You all know who you are. Three M's, Havoc Marauder.
I began writing this tribute post before I watched the finale, and I'm finishing it after the finale. I'll end my ramble with this:
Dee and Michelle, thank you for bringing these characters to life over the last four years. You two really were the heart and soul of this project and your voices will forever ring true as Clone Force 99.
Filoni, thank you for creating the concepts for this wonderful show that has become such a big part of so many people's lives.
Brad, thank you for the immense work you've put into the show, your direction will not be forgotten.
Jen, Joel, KinerBros, and Noshir (The Four Horsemen), y'all are a bunch of trolls and I hate you for it. I'm sending you my therapy bills. (I mean thank you for your work too, but you've been playing with my emotions for the past three months so forgive me if I'm a bit bitter)
It has truly been an amazing view. I don't plan on going anywhere, the fandom is just getting started, I am on the edge of my seat for all the wonderful fan creation that are yet to come.
CT-9901 ~ Sergeant Hunter ~ Havoc 1
CT-9902 ~ Tech ~ Havoc 2
CT-9903 ~ Wrecker ~ Havoc 3
CT-9904 ~ Crosshair ~ Havoc 4
ARC-1409 ~ Echo
Omega ~ Havoc 5
Clone Force 99 ~ Signing off 🫡
#the bad batch#star wars#tbb#tbb crosshair#the clone wars#tbb hunter#tbb tech#tbb wrecker#tbb echo#tbb omega
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Counting Turaga
So... open question to the Bionicle fandom: how many Turaga are there? Or, perhaps, putting it better: how many Turaga are there supposed to be?
Without really thinking about it, I have two not-quite-compatible mental images, which we'll call "Plenty of Turaga" and "Turaga are Rather Rare."
Plenty of Turaga comes from the original years of the saga: there are six of them, one per village, as many as the Toa. There's a footnote on BioSector01, on the Turaga page, that Greg said there were more Turaga than Toa left at the end of the story (so, "more than 58" as the page put it).
On the other hand, the rest of the saga really has me imagining fairly scarce Turaga: there's never more than one mentioned in Metru Nui, Jovan seems to have been a Turaga alone. The norm seems to be: one Turaga, one village. Metru Nui, in particular, seems to highlight this contrast: there were 11 Toa Mangai, but there's only one Turaga.
Thinking about this, I suppose that it's partly just attrition: the same thing happening to the Turaga that happened to the Toa by the end of the MU. And not every Toa is going to survive to be a Turaga.
But...
What if it's by design? What if there aren't SUPPOSED to be that many Turaga? A village may need a team of defenders, but does it really need more than one sage leader in the same way? When the Great Beings made the first Turaga, how many Toa did they expect to transform?
What really has me thinking that the ratio of Turaga to Toa probably isn't supposed to be 1-to-1 is Destiny. If it really is the case (I've grumbled about this before) that only certain Matoran are destined to become Toa, why would it be the case that all Toa are destined to be Turaga? Doesn't it make more sense for only certain Toa to be destined to be Turaga?
(Sidebar: destiny in Bionicle is basically whatever you want it to be--it's as malleable as time travel in Doctor Who, but I don't think it matters for this argument if destiny means "programmed from the very beginning," "an ever-changing, ever-adapting plan of Mata Nui to meet the circumstances," or something else. At least as long as you don't stray too far toward the edges...)
I find that I actually really like the idea that Turaga might be rarer than Toa and only the destiny for a few of them, larger because it really makes the Toa Metru take center stage: if the norm is that only a few Toa become Turaga and then an ENTIRE TEAM becomes Turaga, that means they are special, right?
From a meta perspective, of course the Metru as special: they're the archetypes of Turaga for any fan who followed along from 2001. Having it turn out that they're actually a massive reversal of what is normal makes their personal destinies fit really well with the reveal that the island paradise of Mata Nui is not actually where they belong: fans imagine Mata Nui (and plentiful Turaga) as the default for Matoran, because we entered the story there, but an island paradise (and a whole Toa team becoming Turaga) is not what was normal in the MU.
I also like it because it lets you have fun with the "who really is the destined team of Toa" story, where Mata Nui is putting forward the Toa Metru and Teridax is nudging forward the Mask Matoran. If the Mask Matoran couldn't become Toa, then what was the point of that? Lhikan would give them stones, it wouldn't work, he'd take them back, and he'd try again (right?). On the other hand, if they were able to become Toa, what's the advantage to Teridax in picking those six rather than the other six?
My proposed answer: Teridax has no idea. He can just read the signs that Mata Nui wants the Metru, so being the contradictory bad guy that he is, he figures a different set of Toa has got to be slightly worse. After all, Teridax has picked off a lot of great Toa already--the new Toa will need to be superb to do what the Mangai couldn't, and if the new Toa aren't quite what Mata Nui wants...
But what Mata Nui really wants isn't warriors; it's wisdom. The Metru do important and valiant things as Toa, but the single greatest thing they do is sacrifice their power for the Matoran, and that was an act of wisdom. When Mata Nui picked them, he wasn't only picking Toa who could save them once in battle, but Toa who could save them again in transforming, Turaga who could lead them.
I think this takes a little bit of the sting out of the end of LoMN (not necessarily a good thing--bittersweetness and loss is a huge part of Bionicle--but I think we do want our faves to be happy and significant). If being a Turaga is special and rare, then there's a eucatastrophic miracle in all six of them becoming Turaga at the end: a miracle that speaks of hope in a dark hour.
Maybe it would also explain why they founded six villages on Mata Nui: one village for each Turaga.
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One last time
The bad batch s3 ep 15 spoilers
I am not okay.
Kids survived, some clones survived, tha batch survived What more could we ask for? Well i know Tech. I wanted Tech to return why couldn't he return. Why give us hope why? They convinced us cx2 is someone important and i believed he was tech. But no they just gave hope for nothing.
Ending caught me off guard. I thought someone was going to die i think everyone thought someone would ünd maybe even everyone dies. They survived all them i am glad by this its great.
I cried a lot. When they mentioned Tech i couldn't keep it together.
I am still sad. Ending was great we have everything we ever wanted except Tech.
Hemlock died, rampart died. Nala Se was good. Emerie helped the batch and now she and echo going to help clone underground(hopefully we will get a clone underground show with this artstyle). Everyone and everything is good again except tech i can't stop thinking the fact that they didn't bring hil back why???
If he doesn't have a hand to tremble, there is no trembling problem. They actually did that.
Echo is proud of Omega, hunter wrecker and crosshair knew right away zillo was omega's work.
I thought wrecker was going to die when he echo asked where Hunter and Crosshair are.
The hug omega gave Hunter and Crosshair, the scene where all the batch (except echo and tech of course) sitting in peace so beautiful.
Clone x troopers there are 4 of them. When i was watching i thought they might have been developed with special mutations like bad batch's. But this is not true probably one of those clone looked like a reg. They are all probably reg but how can they fight so good?
Btw I didn't think for even 1 second that the clones wouldn't help rescue their brothers. I like clones, their personality (and their voice ofc) is perfect.
I hope Crosshair knows tech wanted to save him(they must have told him right?). I wish Tech could've see crosshair's character development his story. I wish no could've knew he joined them. I wish... Tech was alive. They didn't bring him back but how could he be dea i still can't belive and now while writing this i am thinking why can't he still be alive maybe i am being so delusional but they didn't confirmed he is dead if there is no body then there is no death, right? Since the end of season 2 we assumed he was alive but they didn't do anything different in this episode than the whole season to prove he is dead. But we still believed he was alive why cant we still believe he is alive the show ended yes but maybe in the future they will make a clone underground show and maybe tech will return. He probably wouldn't return but i refuse to believe he is dead i will believe he is alive untul they prove he is dead but they probably wouldn't prove it. So in my mind tech will be alive and i don't care if i am being too delusional. 🤷🏻♀️
When i see older omega first i thought she became a liberater of ancient wonders but this ending made so much more sense. Omega left without saying goodbye to crosshair and wrecker. But Hunter and omega's conversation was beautiful. I think they made that place like a museum?
Crosshair and hunter together killed hemlock, they saved omega together, they believed omega, they believed eachother and themselves. That scene was perfect.
Everything went well, we got a better ending what i expected. But tech...
No matter how much we want some stories doesn't have a happy ending this is what i think about even though we have happy ending i will never forget how tech sacrificed himself for his family. in the end they didn't waste his sacrifice in s2 finale and they did what they were going to do before hemlock captured omega in s2. They lived a peaceful life in pabu they retired.
I keep coming back to the same thing, i know but i can't help it. Tech tech tech... Heroic tech.
I've written too many things too mixed up. But if you've read this far, thank you. And I'm so glad I can be a part of this adventure. I started by writing my thoughts about star wars on Tumblr. And here, theories, fanarts, headcanons, everything was beautiful. Thank you everyone for everything. I'm glad I was able to experience the adventures of Bad Batch with you. goodbye till the next adventure.
thank you dee bradley baker and michelle ang for bringing these characters to life. And thanks to everyone who worked on this beautiful show.
It has been a beautiful (sometimes painful an sometimes peaceful) journey.
goodbye to the bad batch, goodbye
Hunter
Tech
Wrecker
Crosshair
Echo
and Omega.
It has been an honor to know you and being able to watch your adventures. Goodbye o7.
#star wars#the bad batch#tbb hunter#tbb tech#tbb wrecker#tbb crosshair#tbb echo#tbb omega#tbb s3 spoilers#tbb rex#tbb howzer#tbb gregor#tbb wolffe#tbb mayday#tbb cody#tbb batcher#tbb gonky#tbb phee#tbb ventress#tbb season 3#goodbye
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Guuuyyyyyyys? Can we all just agree that this is canon noowwwwwww?
These two have been eating at my brain all night it’s chronic.
Like?? AUGHHHHHH I LOVE THEM I LOVE THEM I LOVE THEM I LOVE THEM I LOVE THEM I-
Every fandom I'm in has that one straight-passing ship that I make my personality for a couple weeks lol. This is that straight-passing ship for Rayman lol.
A buncha ideas and progress below cut:
Teensy Ray Thoughts:
Teensy Ray (who's name is probably Raymond I haven't decided yet) is the kind and soft-spoken leader of the Rayman Fan-Club. He is the go-to person for all things Rayman, and has basically turned his house into a makeshift shrine museum for the guy.
He DIYed his entire cosplay of Rayman. He cut up his cloak and altered it to look more like a "hoodie", even wrapping his arms with bandages to represent Rayman's "limbless-ness." The thing he struggled with most was the hair.
Speaking of the hair, the "implant" that Polokus talks about in Origins was actually a little bird creature he found one day. Its tail feathers stick up like Rayman's two hair strands and can whirl around in a haircopter style.
The creature is also a kind-of wing man for TR. It can read how he feels and will move its tail accordingly.
The reason why TR started the Rayman Fan-Club and dresses as him a ton was because way back in the day, he was directly saved by Rayman (like Rayman hauled his ass out of danger manually kinda saving). He feels like the club is the least he could do to repay his hero
Also he and Ray are pen-pals lol (but Rayman takes decades to respond)
Teensy Ray is a hopeless romantic. Any sort of romantic gesture, no matter how small, sweeps him off his feet.
He was originally Teensy Queen's "safe date." He was down for it, both because she was incredibly pretty and because she let him go on super long rambles about Rayman.
When she eventually fell for him, he fell for her almost instantly, and things have been going smoothly ever since lol.
The "How Did You Bag A Baddie?" audio.
Teensy Queen Thoughts:
Queen Teensy (honestly might name her Quincy lol) is the bad bitch teensy of the Glade. She has the heart of an adventurer, constantly running away from the boring royal duties to practice her magic and fighting skills.
She will run off, kick ass by halting a nightmare invasion of some rural town, then return just in time for her royal duties.
She loves fighting almost as much as she loves Rayman lol.
Queen had a mega crush on Rayman and was desperate to get with him. However, Rayman (the aroace king he is) took no interest in her whatsoever.
She decided to settle for TR as a sort of "substitute" for Rayman at first. She was constantly heckled by her family for never giving any man a chance, so she retaliated by grabbing the teensy who looked the most like Rayman and basically fake-dating him.
After a couple months or so of just being safe-date buddies, she started to gain actual feelings for TR, to which he reciprocated. She was in a lot of denial about it though for a while.
She be like "I don't date dorks!" then ends up with this mf.
Teensy Queen is Grand Romantic Gestures in teensy form. She will go out of her way to create large displays for the people she loves and cares about.
The "EXCUSE ME, HE ASKED FOR NO PICKLES." kinda person.
That's all I have rn. Expect more art of these guys cuz they're gonna be so everything to me for like two months lol.
Thanks for indulging in my delusion lol. Have a lovely day :)
#i did this instead of working on finals i'm so good at time management#i'm surprised no one has drawn these two before#like it's right there dude how??????#maybe i'm just a chronic shipper or smth 💀💀💀#thanks zynt for opening my eyes btw lol#looooooowwwwwkeeeeeyyyyyyy basing the ship devolopment on my parents but shushshhhhh#bi people shipping goes crazy lol#staightn't ppl#rayman#rayman fanart#rayman legends#rayman origins#rayman games#teensy#teensies#rayman teensies#teensy queen#teensy ray#teensy shipping#rayman shipping#rayman teensy ray#rayman queen teensy#illustration#katiekatdragon27
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MONTHLY MEDIA: April 2024
Ooooooooh it's getting warmer and sunnier and the days are getting longer! Yet I still stay inside to read and watch tv and stuff.
……….FILM……….
Pee-Wee's Big Adventure (1985)
Loved it. A comedy that is so generous with the types of humour (sight gags, absurdist stuff, one-lines). Watching it I was thinking "oh this reminds me of watching Elvira" and then Cassandra Peterson shows up in the biker gang! Loved the whole thing.
Lupin III: The Castle of Cagliostro (1979)
I've been meaning to watch this ever since Sam Bosma shared the incredible poster he did. If I didn't know Hayao Miyazaki directed this then I would've spent the entire runtime thinking "whoa real Hayao Miyazaki vibes here." Great standalone film if you know nothing about Lupin III.
……….TELEVISION……….
Fallout (Episode 1.01 to 1.08)
Having never played the games, I was really interested if this series would work for someone like me. It took a bit to connect and it mostly landed. Not bad at all but it hasn't really left a lasting impression.
Succession (3.05 to 4.02)
Can't believe it's almost over. What I appreciate about this series is that it knows the show is at its best when the core trio are together and does everything it can to highlight this. But never forget that they are all awful people. Absolute power corrupts absolutely.
Delicious in Dungeon (Episode 1.14 to 1.17)
This adaptation of the comic continues to be excellent. I hope folks dig the show so much that they decide to read the series as it offers a few more character details that are fun to discover.
X-Men '97 (Episode 1.01 to 1.07)
Wasn't a big fan of X-men (comic or the show) as a kid but heard enough good things that I figured I'd check it out. While I'm not immune to the nostalgia of the intro, I really do think the show is fantastic. The story feels dramatic and just mature enough to allow for great character moments and the animation is top-notch. Really glad I gave this a shot.
……….YOUTUBE……….
Why I (Used to) Hate Video Essays by Extranet Shaquille and Yellow Paint by Caleb Gamman
Just a coincidence but these two unrelated videos both veer away from their main topics to become a study in...media consumption/attention culture/the struggles of existing in our current times.
(Video Essays) VIDEO
(Yellow Paint) VIDEO
……….READING……….
Appointment with Death by Agatha Christie
(Complete)
This feels more like the first Christie book I read (There is a Tide, still my favourite) in that there are twists and turns around engaging characters. Plus the victim was such an engaging villain. Based on the handful I've read so far, I think this would be a good entry point into Christie's works.
A Spectre Haunting: On the Communist Manifesto by China Miéville
(Complete)
After hearing a number of interviews with Mieville I was really excited for this but found the whole thing...frustrating. Maybe I'm not smart enough or maybe I'm not the target audience, but I don't really know who this book was written for. My gut tells me the writing is practically impenetrable unless you have a masters in English and that doesn't feel like the right fit for the subject matter. If brevity is the soul of wit then I'll leave it there and just say that the last couple pages, written clearly and with conviction, did more for me than the previous 150+ pages.
Delicious in Dungeon Volume 13 (and also Volume 6) by Ryoko Kui
(Complete)
Rereading and also catching up on the latest volume! It's nearly over! Volume 13 is the penultimate chapter and I'm still impressed by how consistent the characters, humour, and dedication to theme this series remains. Really really incredible.
……….GAMING……….
Neverland: A Fantasy Role-Playing Setting (Andrews McMeel Publishing)
Tuesday crew is picking off the invading Elves fairly effectively but at what cost? And what are the repercussions of an act like this? Only time will tell. Also you can read all about their adventures here!
Oz: A Fantasy Role-Playing Setting (Andrews McMeel Publishing)
The Mof1 crew continues to dig into the mysteries of the mud banks but might get sidetracked by the fame and fortune of wrestling.
And that's it. See you in May!
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