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lightupthemoon · 2 years

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The Effect You Got On Me (Part 5)

PART V: I won't hesitate for you

PART 1 // PART 2 // PART 3 // PART 4

Summary: You're sulking around and Kate's not at her best. It's time for America to intervene.

Pairing: Kate Bishop x Reader

Warnings: Smut 18+. MINORS, DNI.

Word Count: 6.5k

Read on AO3

Author’s Note: So here it is, the final part. Thank you all so much for all your comments, reblogs, and likes, it was my fuel to keep on writing. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. The title for this one is based on Hesitate by the JoBros.

America closed the door behind her, unable to contain a deep sigh when she saw you curled up in your bed with a blanket thrown over your head. Again. You were still wearing an oversized purple sweatshirt that you had worn for days, and she was sure you hadn't moved from your spot since she last saw you in the morning. It was heartbreaking and, honestly, a little ridiculous. She walked over to you, your bed dipping as she took a seat by your feet, trying to snatch the blanket from your grasp.

"Okay, that's enough. We need to talk," America grunted, and your grip on the blanket tightened as she failed to take the fabric from you.

"Leave me alone, Mer," you groaned, turning on your side facing the wall. "I'm fine."

"I've been doing that, but I'm starting to worry, cariño, you barely leave this bed."

"It's the weekend. I should be allowed."

"It's been more than just the weekends, though," America whined as she finally freed the blanket from your grasp, pulling it completely off you and throwing it to the floor.

Another groan escaped you, covering your face with a pillow. Your voice came out muffled as you said, "Ugh, America, it's nothing. I swear."

"I'm not dumb, Y/N. I know this has something to do with Kate," America huffed.

You glanced at her from under the pillow, absentmindedly pulling at the strings of your sweatshirt, the faintest scent of lavender and musk lingering in the fabric the only comfort you had.

"Why would it have anything to do with her?"

"First off, I'm pretty sure that's Kate's," America shrugged, pointing at your sweatshirt. "You seem to be avoiding each other, and you even skipped on our last game night. Something must have happened."

You laid on your back, staring at the ceiling. Kate's words still echoed in your mind, feeling like a thorn stuck in your heart that you couldn't get out, no matter how hard you tried. You couldn't think of anything else but how Kate looked at you as she broke your heart, confirming your deepest fears that what you had truly had meant nothing to her. That sensation only heightened when you saw her across campus flirting with random chicks again a few days after, the details of her latest escapades reaching you faster than any other time before. The girls were bragging, and they wanted you to know that Kate Bishop didn't need you, as if you needed the reminder.

You were angry with Kate's stupid fan club for treating the archer like a prize to win, an object to have fun with when they would never scratch the surface of what Kate really was. You were angry with Kate for the words she said. For hurting you and throwing your friendship into the trash without a second thought. Most importantly, you were angry with yourself for falling in love with her when you knew you would be just another name on Kate's endless list. You hated how sad the silence between you and Kate made you and how difficult it was for you to carry on with your life while Kate had gone back to her usual activities as if nothing had changed. Like the months with you never even existed.

"We tried to coax the information out of Kate, but she wouldn't budge," America continued at your lack of response. "So what's going on, cariño? Talk to me."

You sighed, moving the pillow off your face. You sat on the bed, throwing the hood of your sweatshirt over your head, your back resting on the wall. America moved over to sit next to you, her hands finding one of yours and lacing her fingers together with yours to show her support. You sank your teeth into your bottom lip, preparing yourself for the conversation you were about to have.

"Kate and I had a thing going on for a few months."

America squinted her eyes, bewildered. "A thing as in…"

"Sleeping together, yes."

"Oh, I knew it!" America exclaimed triumphantly, startling you a bit. She grinned. “I told Yelena and she didn’t want to believe me, it was just so obvious!” The smile on her face faltered a little when she registered all of your words. "Wait. You said 'had'?"

You inhaled deeply, nodding your head. Despite feeling slightly guilty for sharing the story with America after promising you would keep it a secret, you told her everything, a huge weight lifting from your shoulders as you got it off your chest. America listened attentively and although she was a little scandalized that all that had happened right under her nose without her noticing, she shifted into her understanding best friend mode and kept her facial expressions to the minimum. She was only unable to stop herself from rolling her eyes when you told her about Sharon and her quarrel with Kate, unsurprisingly taking Kate’s side.

By the time you finished your story, your head was on her lap while America soothing scratched your scalp as she would always do when you were upset.

"... Kate said we just fucked and she didn’t have to explain herself to me and I didn’t know how to respond to that so I just… left."

America grimaced. “Ouch. That had to hurt.”

“Yeah.”

"Can I ask you why you went with Sharon? It's genuine interest; I'm not trying to shit on your ex!" Your best friend quickly clarified when she saw the hesitation on your face. "You spent the entire week worrying about Kate, and you still ditched her to go talk to Sharon. Why?"

"Because I'm an idiot, Mer," You replied, looking down at your fingers playing with the strings of your sweatshirt. "I thought her interest could mean something, as stupid as it sounds, and I only confirmed that part of my life is over. I'll never fall for Sharon's lies again."

"Finally, some common sense!" America chirped, and you glared at her. "Sorry, continue."

"And I needed Kate to know that in case she…" you trailed off, covering your face with your hands. "The whole thing was a mess because I'm such an idiot."

America's eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "In case she what?"

"It's stupid," you mumbled.

America gasped, pulling her hand from your hair and pushing your own off your face. "Y/N Y/L/N, do you have feelings for Kate Bishop? Is that it?"

You chewed on your lip, looking everywhere but at America's grinning face. Your silence was all the answer she needed.

"Oh my god, you do!" She squealed. "This makes so much sense, why didn't I see this before? You wouldn't have sat through hours of boring practices if you didn't."

"Well, it doesn't matter anymore because Kate doesn't want anything to do with me and her fan club is enjoying her so very much." You squinted your eyes, venom spewing off your every word. "And even if she did, Kate Bishop does not believe in love or romance or anything like that. It's a lost cause either way."

America shook her head in disagreement, her fingers returning to your scalp. "I don't know, Y/N, what if she got so angry because she was jealous?"

"America, why would Kate ever be jealous of Sharon? She could literally have anything she wanted."

"'Cause she wants you, and you went with Sharon instead of her," America said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Maybe she has feelings for you, too."

"That's not possible."

"Why?"

"Because–" You breathed out. "It just doesn't make sense. I'm just… me. I'm nothing special."

"You did not just say that," America uttered in disbelief. "You are the most special. It amazes me how incredible you are. Anyone–and I mean it–absolutely anyone would be lucky to have you."

"You're supposed to say that, Mer. You’re my best friend."

"Well, let me tell you this then." America adjusted in her seat to look directly into your eyes. "The way Kate looked at you, Y/N… she'd light up whenever you walked into a room. Yelena constantly teased her about it and she would just smile. And have you seen her social media? Pictures of you, everywhere. I know she said she was just messing with the masses or whatever but come on. Hell, the fact that she was so chirpy and talkative at the ass crack of morning when she came to pick you up for breakfast?" America scoffed. "You and I both know Kate Bishop is not a morning person. If that isn't love, I don't know what that is."

"Friendship?"

America crossed her arms over her chest. "I don't see her taking me out for breakfast!"

"Well, she is no longer taking me either, so…"

America rolled her eyes. "So you're gonna do nothing? Just let it be over?"

"What can I do? Kate was pretty clear last time we spoke. I’m sure she was just waiting for the opportunity to get back out there.”

“So nothing I just said stuck with you?”

"Mer, as much as I'd like to believe your perfect fairytale, I have to look at the facts. And the fact is that Kate looks happy flirting and probably fucking her stupid fan club." You sighed. “I think the best thing I can do is just walk away with whatever dignity I have left. Move on. The semester is almost over, and Kate and I weren’t even that close to begin with, anyway. I’ll get over it.”

You could see in America's eyes that she didn't believe a single word you said, but she knew better than to push it. You were stubborn, and that idea was clearly deep in your heart. She wouldn't talk you out of it. The brunette pushed you off her lap, sliding off the bed and clapping her hands.

"You are not going to get over it sulking in this bed so let's go, I'm taking you out."

"But Mer, I–"

"No buts! You're gonna shower, change into something that isn't Bishop purple, and I'm gonna crack a window open because it smells rotten in here. And then we are gonna get junk food, and crash at Peter's to watch those crappy old movies he likes until you feel better, alright?"

You smiled sadly. Even if the heartbreak was killing you, at least you wouldn't have to deal with it on your own.

—

Kate wouldn’t stop glancing at the stands. Her archery semifinals were about to start, her bow was anxiously shaking in her grasp as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other, the arrows strapped to her back rattling with her every move. She could see some random chicks she wasn’t even sure she knew sitting on the bottom bleachers, holding signs with her name written on them. She saw a few of her professors not far from them, which she invited out of courtesy and never really expected them to show. There were also her teammates from other sports a few wooden planks up, chatting amongst themselves while the competition started. Right up front and center, Yelena, America, Peter, and MJ were deeply enthralled in a conversation that had Yelena mindlessly shoving popcorn into her mouth with her eyes wide as saucers, and Peter and MJ giddily smiling. No sign of you.

Kate tried to follow her own advice. Get you out of her system, cleanse her palate. She went to the first bar she stumbled upon, hit on the prettiest girl she could find, and made it to a hot and heavy make-out session with that girl in a dingy bathroom stall when it became clear she just couldn’t do it. The more she kissed the girl, the more she wanted it to be you. Kate paid the girl’s tab for wasting her time, went home, and stared at your contact name on her phone for a while. She tried for a few more nights, hoping for better luck, but the results were just the same. Kate wanted you, and she had no desire to touch anybody else.

That didn’t stop the rumors from flying around. The girl from the bar didn’t keep their encounter quiet, and soon enough, there were far too many women claiming to have slept with Kate in the course of two weeks. The brunette didn’t care enough to disprove the rumors, especially not when she was convinced you didn’t care, and in everyone’s mind, the balance had been restored and everything was back to normal.

But things were far from normal. Before every competition, you would hug her tightly and whisper in her ear she had nothing to worry about because she was the best. You would kiss her cheek, remind her you'd be right where she could see you, and wish her luck before walking back to your seat. None of the other girls knew what each competition meant to Kate but you did. You never told Kate she was the best because it was what the archer wanted to hear–you said it because you believed it. It was your unwavering belief in her that gave her the confidence to snatch that first place medal every time.

Now, she didn't have that and Kate hated it with every cell in her body.

The archer took a deep breath, the air hurting as it entered her lungs. You weren’t going to show. Kate knew that. She had repeated it to herself all morning, and yet she still could feel the disappointment settling in her chest. A part of her wanted to run to America, beg her to say you were just running late and you’d be there any second, but she couldn’t. It was over.

"Come on, Bishop, you've done this on your own plenty of times before. You've got this." Kate said to herself, gazing at the stands one last time. "You don't need her."

The competition started. Her team started with iffy numbers, six, sevens, and eights across the boards, but fully confident in Kate’s skills with a bow, their coach didn’t panic. Kate did, however. When it was her turn, her hands trembled a little as she lined her arrow. She breathed in and took her time to shoot, annoying whispers rising immediately. Kate Bishop was always sure, fast, and precise. She fired and her first shot resulted in an eight.

Damn it. Kate inhaled the fresh air deeply, begging her body to relax. She took her position again, focusing on the basics. Everything she told you to do that the day she taught you to shoot. It came rushing to her–her chest pressed to your back, her chin on your shoulder as she gave you instructions, her hand on your elbow, the way you relaxed when she wrapped her fingers around yours. Kate pulled the arrow and bowstring back, focusing on the happy memory. She exhaled and released the arrow. Bullseye. The cheers were loud and the corners of her mouth rose slightly, only to disappear entirely when, out of habit, she turned to the stands and saw MJ on your usual seat instead of you.

The rest of the competition went just the same. Kate couldn’t concentrate completely, scoring more nines than tens, and the occasional eight. She still came up with the best score, and her team moved up to the finals of the state championship, but everyone seemed concerned that the usually perfect and self-proclaimed world's greatest archer Kate Bishop couldn't score perfect numbers throughout the day. Something shook her ground, and everyone noticed.

Kate faked a smile through all the formalities. She apologized to her team, promised to be at her best for the championship, and thanked her professors for attending the event. She walked past the girls and straight to her friends as fast as she could. Yelena, Peter, and MJ cheered and congratulated her, but the archer could see in their eyes they were just as confused as everyone else. America only eyed her curiously with a teasing smirk.

“Come on, we’re having dinner at my place to celebrate,” Yelena announced, throwing her arm around Kate’s shoulders. “You need to relax until the big one.”

Kate stared at America, the question so clear in her eyes she didn't have to say it out loud. America knew. The brunette shrugged, giving the archer a tight-lipped smile that screamed sorry.

Kate sighed. "Thank you, guys. I, um, need to go check on some things. But I'll catch up with you guys later, yeah?"

"Kate, come on, it wasn't bad! You literally had the best score!" Peter was quick to reassure her. MJ instantly elbowed him in the ribs, saying I thought we weren’t going to mention it under her breath.

Yelena glared at them both. "Yeah, you have nothing to worry about; let’s just go eat."

"You’re absolutely going to kill it at finals; I just know it," Peter added.

“You’re the best archer on the team.”

“The team? Best archer in the world.”

"Guys," America interrupted their ramblings, keeping her soft chocolate gaze on Kate. "She said she'll catch up with us. Let's give her some space, okay?"

Peter and Yelena protested, but MJ ultimately pulled them away. Yelena patted her best friend's shoulder before walking past her, and Peter gave her an awkward side hug. MJ grabbed his hand and made him follow her, giving the archer a small smile. America didn't move, and Kate looked at her once the rest was a bit far away. America smiled, extending her arms towards the archer.

"I know I'm not her but I can give you a hug, too."

Kate raised her eyebrows, placing her bow between her feet and letting America engulf her in a hug. Kate rested her chin on America's shoulder, blinking back tears.

"She told you."

America's arms tightened around her, nodding. "Yeah, she did. And for what it's worth," America pulled away, searching for Kate's blue gaze. “Y/N misses you. And I can tell you miss her, too.”

“I can’t, she wants Sharon, and I–” Kate shook her head, wiping her tears before they fell. “I can’t. It’s better this way.”

“Is it, though?” America rubbed her arm, tenderly. "Love is not a bad thing, Kate. You're allowed to want it."

"But I don't want to want it, Mer," Kate let out with a teary laugh. "Look where it's gotten me."

“And you’ll never know where it could take you if you don’t tell her how you feel.” America smiled. “Talk to her, get it off your chest. Trust me, you’ll feel better.”

America gave her one last hug before heading in the direction the rest had gone.

—

With the semester ending soon, you had a small mountain of assignments to keep your mind away from how wrong it felt to skip Kate’s competition. You turned off your phone as soon as you woke up, not wanting to deal with Peter and Yelena’s guilt-tripping and insistence, which had increased in the last few days. You weren’t sure if America had told them anything, but you weren’t going to find out. You were going to focus on your degree and nothing else. You’d have all of the summer to sulk around and move on.

By the time the sun was coming down, the words on the book pages started blurring together. You exhaled heavily through your nose, closing the book and stretching. You got up from your seat and walked to your closet, searching for something more comfortable to change into. Without even looking, you picked up a pair of sweats and the first sweatshirt you found, stripping out of your jeans and shirt when there was a loud knock on your door. You huffed, annoyed, deciding to ignore it and continue changing. Whoever was outside would have to get the hint and leave you alone. You pulled the sweatshirt over your head, the faint smell of lavender hitting your nose. Of course, you grabbed the other piece of clothing you had stolen from Kate’s closet.

"Why am I like this?" You mumbled to yourself under your breath, pulling the black and purple fabric to your nose, smelling it again. Another knock on your door, more insistent this time. "Ugh, I'm coming."

You begrudgingly put on your sweats and walked to the door, swinging it open to shoo whoever was behind your door. Standing there, in a high ponytail and still wearing her archery suit, Kate Bishop stood right before you.

"Hi," she said, nervously, and the bags under her eyes told you that, much like you, she hadn't slept well in days. Unlike you, probably from all the fucking around.

She opened her mouth to say something else and without thinking about it, you slammed the door shut in her face.

You heard Kate sigh behind the door. "Y/N."

You shot your eyes closed. "You got the wrong door, move along. I'm sure there's one or two girls you haven't fucked down the hall."

"Y/N, please. I need to talk to you."

"No, I don't think you do."

Kate rested her forehead against the door, closing her eyes, her heart in her throat. "I'm sorry, okay? Please, just let me explain."

"There's nothing to explain, Bishop." You could feel the tears welling up in your eyes and you would be damned if you shed one more tear because of her. It wasn't going to happen. "We fucked, you got bored, and moved on to the next new thing. It's what you've always done. I get it."

"That's not at all what happened. Please, just let me–"

"No."

"Fine," Kate said, pushing herself off the door and crossing her arms over her chest. "Don't open it."

"I wasn't going to."

"But I'm gonna stay right here and I won't go anywhere until you do."

"You'll have to use the bathroom at some point."

"I'll hold it, I don't care. I'm not leaving until I talk to you."

No one said anything for a moment. You could see her shadow under the door, and you wondered if she actually would stay there all night.

As if she was reading your mind, she said, "I've never turned down a challenge, you know this."

Huffing and puffing, you decided to get it over with. You had so much to get done, maybe yelling at Kate Bishop to leave you alone was just what you needed to move on with your life and crush your finals. You opened the door slowly, and she looked at you with those damn blue eyes, the same look of determination she would save for archery glowing in her irises. You opened your mouth to tell her off when she just surged forward, grabbing your face with her large cold hands and kissing you squarely on the lips.

It took you a moment to react. You blinked a few times, unsure of what was happening, but the pressure of her lips against yours felt so familiar and oh-so-heavenly your body relaxed, your hands finding a resting place on her hips as you closed your eyes and returned the kiss. Kate hummed in satisfaction, tilting her head a bit to the side and deepened the kiss, the urgency evident in her movements. It felt like a well-rehearsed dance only you and Kate knew the steps to, breathing life back into your body. For the first time in weeks, you felt complete. Kate only pulled away when her lungs begged her to but even then, her mouth ghosted over you, taking her time to breathe you in.

Finally, she half-smiled. "I'm sorry, I couldn't spend another second without doing that."

"Kate, what the–"

"I panicked, okay? I started having all these feelings I never had before and I didn't want to deal with it so I ran away. Then Sharon said all these things that got to my head and I thought you still wanted her and I couldn't handle it. So, I just… didn’t.” Kate’s heart was beating loudly in her ears. She didn’t mean for the words to just burst out of her, but she couldn’t stop now. She needed you to know. “It wasn’t just sex, I don’t think it ever was. You are my favorite person in the world and it’s so scary, all these things you make me feel.” Her blue eyes glistened like sapphires with the tears welling up in them. "I've never wanted it, you know? To feel this way. To want someone so much that I feel like I'm gonna explode. I never wanted to give anyone the power to break me but here I am, giving it to you anyway because–" A shaky breath left her lips. "I've never wanted anything the way I want you."

Kate's gaze locked with yours. You saw different emotions in the blue of her eyes, the most prominent of all a level of adoration that made your knees tremble. Her thumb gently caressed your cheek, waiting for you to speak. You were stunned. Your heart was wildly beating in your chest, your voice stuck in your throat. Your brain was working overtime to process Kate's confession, fully convinced it was all a dream. There was no way this was true, it made no sense. It couldn't be.

"Please, say something." Fear was evident in Kate's voice. You opened your mouth but nothing came out. Maybe she was too late. Maybe she had ruined it. Maybe you never felt the same at all.

Finally, you sighed, a smile drawing on your lips. "Kate Bishop, you're such an idiot."

She furrowed her eyebrows, prepared for the worst, but you wrapped your arms around her, flushing your bodies together. "I don't want Sharon." You saw a glimmer of hope swimming in the stormy waters of her eyes, and you wanted nothing more than to dive in them. “That part of my life is over, it has been for a while." You pressed your forehead against hers. "I only want you."

The archer pulled you back for another kiss that felt like coming up for air after drowning. All of the hurt and sorrow that you both had carried from that last bitter encounter instantly disappeared, finally back in the place you were meant to be. Her tongue brushed your bottom lip, asking for permission, your mouth parting open automatically at the touch. Her lips were gentle against you, moving in a slow motion, unlike any other kiss you had ever shared. It felt like the first kiss. The right kiss.

Kate's lips attached to your jaw and down to your neck in a trail of soft kisses. A mewl of satisfaction vibrated out your throat, igniting a wildfire within the archer. Kate slammed the door closed with her foot, removing her lips from your neck and losing no time in pulling the sweatshirt off of you. Her mouth met yours in a messy kiss, your fingers finding the zipper of her suit, desperately trying to pull it down. You pouted when it got stuck midway, giving you a peek of her perfectly shaped breasts. You pulled a little harder on it and Kate chuckled, amused, helping you undo it. Your eyes immediately fell to the swell of her breasts as she slipped the purple fabric off her body, licking your lips in anticipation.

You raised an eyebrow, smirking. "Really? No bra?"

"Too tight." Kate smiled, her hands returning to your waist, emanating goosebumps with her gentle touch. "Comes in handy sometimes."

"Couldn't agree more," You mumbled, grabbing her face and kissing her again. She moaned at your eagerness, pulling off your pants and underwear with a swift motion. Your eyes closed and your hands fell to her shoulders, breathy whimpers leaving your throat as her mouth covered your neck in sloppy kisses. You clumsily searched for her pants, sliding your thumbs at the sides of the fabric and slipping them off, along with her underwear. You gripped at her hips and pushed her towards the bed, immediately straddling Kate. Bright blue eyes looked up at you, each of her hands falling to your thighs.

"God, I missed you," she muttered, unleashing a rattling zoo inside your belly. She kissed your collarbones, and trailed her way to the valley of your chest, her fingers ghosting over the skin of your back to free your breasts from their restraints. "Tell me you want me again."

You pulled at the hair tie keeping her hair up, a cascade of black curls falling onto her back. You brushed a few stray strands off her face with a gentle smile.

"I want you, Kate, I only want you. I want you so bad."

You kept on whispering how much you wanted her as you peppered kisses all over her face. Kate closed her eyes, thoroughly enjoying your touch with a dopey grin. Your kisses traveled down to her neck, her breathing hitching when you found her sweet spot. She drew her head back, giving you access to more skin. You rolled your hips on her thigh, moaning loudly against her skin at the friction. Kate groaned, still trying to contain herself and failing miserably.

"Lay down, Katie, let me take care of you."

You lifted your gaze from her abdomen, without tearing your lips from her skin, meeting furiously blown blue eyes. "Who knew you were this impatient?"

Kate barely had time to do what she was told before you took on her lips again with a newfound passion that made the archer grateful she was laying down. Painfully slowly, the brunette felt your lips travel to all the right places in her body, from her neck to her collarbone, passing by her breasts, taking her time with each one of them and increasing the frustration building up inside her with each stroke of your tongue nowhere near where she needed it most. Kate pulled on your hair and practically begged between heavy sighs and intense moans for you to direct your attention to the right place but you were enjoying watching her squirm under your touch in anticipation a little too much. Just as you were running your tongue through her well-defined abdomen, you captured Kate's hand on your own, stopping her from going directly to the place you were knowingly neglecting.

"Y/N, I swear to God," Kate groaned. "If you don't touch me now, I'll–"

"I'm getting there, just gotta wait a little longer."

"Fuck, I need you, Y/N," she whimpered, feeling your fingers between her thighs but not quite where she needed them to be.

"Oh, I know, baby." A small gasp left Kate when she felt your fingers exploring her folds, still ignoring her throbbing clit. "You're drenched." She grunted in desperation, pulling a bit at your hair. "Have you missed my fingers inside you, stretching you so good, Katie?" you didn't know where that came from, only that you couldn't stop. "Or did you want my mouth making you cum so hard you forget what day it is?"

"God, yes," Kate whined and she sounded desperate, lost in a place she rarely let herself be in. She liked to be in control, in charge of when and how her pleasure took her. Never at the mercy and the teasing of someone else. But she could let go of all of it with you. "Just fuck m–"

Kate stopped mid-sentence as soon as she felt not only your tongue but your fingers on her begging core, giving her more attention than she expected. A stream of profanities found its way out of Kate's mouth, euphoria coursing through every inch of her body. Her hips picked up a pace of their own as you pumped your fingers faster, curling them inside, thoroughly enjoying every reaction you received with every flick of your tongue.

"Oh, you taste so good, baby," You muttered with your mouth still toying with her sensitive bud, making her whine. "Bet none of the others ever got you like this, dripping all over, huh?"

Your question surprised both of you, but it surprised you even more how fast she answered. "No, baby, only you. This is all for you."

"That's my girl. I'm gonna take such good care of you. I always have, haven't I?"

Kate couldn't even think of any words to answer you and you were not expecting her to. Unlike all of her stupid one-night stands, you had taken your time memorizing every inch of Kate's body, and your knowledge of what made her tick ran so deep you didn't need much time to push her over the edge. Even when every bit of Kate's legs was twitching and trembling uncontrollably, you kept your full attention on Kate's center, greedily collecting every drop coming out of her with your tongue. Kate felt in another dimension, completely over the moon. When the contact started feeling like too much, she pulled at your hair and moved you away from her core. You kissed your way up her body, leaving small purple marks in the shape of your mouth under her breasts and over the skin of her collarbones. Her chest rose and fell with her hitched breathing, still whimpering softly as she came down from her high. Blue waves of ocean locked into your gaze, pulling you towards her mouth in a bruising kiss immediately after, tasting herself on your lips. As things slowed down, the kiss turned achingly sweet and steady, the kind of kiss that felt like comfort and safety and filled up your stomach with butterflies as if you were a teenager in love.

“I’m gonna need you to be gentle with me,” Kate whispered when the kiss broke away naturally, her nose bumping with yours. “I don’t really know what I’m doing.”

"Um, I'm pretty sure you do. I’ve done it with you a few times, actually. Enjoyed it, even."

"No, not that," Kate chuckled. "I mean…" Her eyes met yours again. "This. You and me. I've never–" she trailed off, a deep blush tinting her cheeks.

You grinned, swiping your thumb over the pink hue. "You’re doing pretty well so far, Katie. And we don't have to call it anything if you don't want to."

"No, no, I do. I just–I don't kn–I don't–"

You stopped her stuttering by kissing her gently, your heart feeling warm and full. "Kate Bishop, do you want to be my girlfriend?"

Kate beamed, her grin matched yours. "I want nothing more."

—

You were on the edge of your seat, gripping Yelena's and America's hands with all your strength as you watched Kate prepare for her last shot for her final competition. Peter and MJ held onto each other anxiously. The competition had been tied up to the last minute when the best shooter from the other team scored a 9 with his final shot. If Kate got a 10, it was over. Your school's team would be state champions again.

Kate took her position, the picture of concentration. Even from the bleachers, you could see the little smirk on her face. She had been perfect for every set–this wouldn't be the exception. In a split second, she looked your way and winked, before releasing her arrow.

You and your friends jumped from your seats, the cheers immediately erupting as soon as her arrow landed perfectly on the bullseye of the target board. Kate's team ran to her, making her laugh as they lifted her over their shoulders and chanted her last name. Yelena threw her arm around your shoulders, and America wrapped her arm around your waist.

"Three-time state champion. She's going to be unbearable." Yelena said, her smile refuting the annoyance in her voice.

"We must destroy her next game night," America said, playful determination in her tone. "We must not let it get to her head."

"MJ is vicious at UNO." Peter pointed out, looking at his girlfriend with a smile. "She could totally take Kate down."

"And Pete has gotten so much better at Battleship," MJ added. "We have options."

"Hey, watch it." You warned them with a smirk. "That's my girlfriend you're talking about."

"And your point is?" Yelena laughed. "We still need to humble her."

"Here she comes!"

Everyone cheered, a grin overtaking Kate's face as she trotted towards you with a gold medal around her neck. You squealed, running to meet her halfway and immediately jumping into her arms. Kate cackled with difficulty when your body collided with hers, placing her arms under your legs as you wrapped them around her waist. You grabbed her by the cheeks and kissed her, ignoring the teasing laughter and loud gagging sounds coming from your friends.

"You did it, baby!" You cheered after the kiss, pressing your forehead to hers. "I'm so proud of you."

"We did it," She beamed, looking at you adoringly. "I wouldn't have done it without you, my love. This medal is yours."

You gasped. "Just the medal?"

Kate rolled her eyes, playfully, her smile never wavering. "I am yours, baby girl, always."

"That's what I like to hear." You giggled, pecking her lips again. "I love you."

"And I love you."

"Ugh, can we go back to when it was a secret?" You heard Yelena say with a whine, making you both turn to her. "I don't know how much more I can take."

"For real! I knew Y/N was all lovey-dovey but you, Kate? Who knew you were this gross?" America asked, scrunching up her nose.

"I think it's cute," MJ said, watching you chuckle while Kate put you down, throwing her arm around your shoulders right after.

"Believe me, it took me by surprise, too," you said, snaking your arms around her waist. "I'm not complaining, though."

"What can I say?" Kate shrugged, kissing your cheek. "That's just the effect you got on me, baby girl."

"Ugh, that was terrible, Kate Bishop," Yelena groaned, visibly cringing. "Even Peter here wouldn't say that, and he's pretty bad, too!"

"Hey, I'm not!" Peter whined, looking at MJ with furrowed eyebrows. "Am I?"

Everyone burst out laughing, already on the way to celebrate at Kate’s apartment, your heart ready to burst with happiness, as it had for the last few weeks. Kate interlocked her fingers with yours, immediately launching into a long recount of her every thought during the competition, adding emphasis to her story using her free hand. Her eyes glimmered, her smile beamed and you could have listened to her talk forever. You hoped with all of your heart that you would.

TAGLIST: @girlssnrosess @simpforflorencepugh1 @phantomvalkyriee @messuhp @dumbassbitchwithnotits @musicinourlips @chrisevanisliterallysir @imlike-so-gaydude @yaaskasey @rootbeerfaygo @hopingforromanoff @an-evergreen-rose

#kate bishop x reader #kate bishop #kate bishop x female reader #kate bishop fic #hawkeye series #kate bishop hawkeye #kate bishop x you #writing #the effect you got on me #marvel fanfiction #kate bishop smut #kate bishop imagine

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lightupthemoon · 2 years

Text

The Effect You Got On Me (Part 4)

PART IV: I wish that I could tell you that you're all that I want

PART 1 // PART 2 // PART 3 // PART 5

Summary: Kate's acting strange and you don't understand what's going on anymore.

Pairing: Kate Bishop x Reader

Warnings: Some light cursing. 18+ still for previous and future parts. MINORS, DNI.

Word Count: 3.7k

Read on AO3

Author's Note: man, this was much more difficult to write than I thought it would be but here it is. Title from Why by Shawn Mendes. Once again, thank you so much for all the feedback, it makes me so happy to read your comments and thoughts on this little thing.

Kate’s strange behavior only increased as time went by. Some days, she would disappear into thin air, completely unreachable. Others, she would knock on your door and crawl into your bed late at night, mumbling that she couldn’t sleep when you weren’t there. Kate would hide her face in the crook of your neck, falling asleep immediately after wrapping your arms around her waist, only to disappear before you woke up. You would have believed it to be a dream had it not been for America questioning you about it after the third or fourth time it happened.

“Tell Kate she doesn’t have to sneak out,” America told you. “As long as there’s no funny business happening with me in the room, I don’t mind her sleeping over. You look cute together.”

And you didn’t know anymore if America was just teasing or if your best friend knew or had heard something the other night, but you didn’t care about that in the least.

The only thing you cared about was Kate.

Questioning her was futile, though. The archer expertly avoided the subject, going on random tangents about her competitions if it ever came up. If you insisted, she'd come up with some random excuse to leave immediately, promising to call, which she would never do.

You couldn’t help but wonder if whatever was bothering her had something to do with your arrangement. You wrecked your brain trying to figure it out, every sign pointing to game night and how her whole mood changed suddenly.

Perhaps, seeing all her friends together, Kate had come to the conclusion that what you had was more trouble than it was worth. Maybe she was already itching to be with someone new; to make her nights more exciting, and she was struggling to come up with ways to let you down easy. It made sense too, with tournament season and the semester nearing its conclusion. Sooner rather than later, things with Kate would have to end.

Her absence pained you more than you were willing to admit. You had grown used to the plush of Kate's lips tracing every inch of your skin like a map to an invaluable treasure, icy eyes glistening sinfully with every whimper her touch emanated in its wake.

The idea of losing that haunted you, but not more so than losing everything else your routine brought.

You loved waking up an hour early every morning to have breakfast with Kate, each ordering different things on the menu so you could share. You loved how the archer would look your way every time she made the bullseye at archery practice, a grin overtaking her face whenever she saw you cheering for her. You loved her stupid jokes, her stories about the reckless adventures that drove her mother nuts, and the things she said late at night after sex that seemed so sacred you wouldn’t dare to speak to anybody else.

All of that would change once Kate decided she wanted to get back out there, and there was nothing you could do to stop it. With how she was acting, maybe all you could really do was prepare for the blow.

“Y/N, where’s your other half? It’s so weird to see you without her now."

It was a nice mid-spring day, cool light air complementing the warm sunlight. Perfect for spending the two hours you had to kill before class reading under the shade of an old oak tree, using your backpack as a pillow. Yelena approached you with a playful smile tugging at her lips, sitting by you cross-legged with her back resting on the tree trunk.

”Haha, very funny. If you're asking about your best friend, Lena, she's probably at fencing practice."

Yelena arched her eyebrows. "And you aren't with her? Color me surprised."

"I haven’t heard from her in a few days.” You sighed. “Didn't want to show up uninvited. She's been acting a little… off lately.”

“Oh, don’t worry about it,” Yelena brushed it off, her expression relaxing. “Kate gets all in her head when the last stretch of competitions is around the corner. It's a Bishop thing, her mother is the same way."

You bit on your cheek, unconvinced. “Are you sure? 'cause I can’t shake this feeling that something else is going on.”

“I am sure that, if it was, she would tell you. You’re like her new best friend now.”

“Yelena…”

“It’s not a complaint!” the blonde quickly clarified, putting both her hands in the air. “I know I am irreplaceable. You’ve gotten really close is all I’m saying.”

"I dunno, I feel like she might be tired of hanging out with me so much."

Yelena huffed in amusement. "Come on, you don't believe that. If I wasn't friends with both of you, I'd truly believe the rumors that you're dating."

"What?" Your voice came out high-pitched, almost choking on your own spit. You sat up, clearing your throat. "Why would you say that?"

"I don't know, you're so… touchy." she scrunched up her nose in discomfort at that last part. "And you go everywhere together. She even brings you to the archery range! Like, that's something else."

"Please, I've seen her flirt with an endless amount of girls there."

"Yeah, but they just show up. Kate has never, not once, taken anyone to her sacred grounds willingly." Yelena smiled, hazel eyes glowing wickedly. "That was until you, of course. Do you know how many girls would kill to hold her quiver? And you get to do it regularly."

You chewed on your lip, hoping with all of you that Yelena couldn't hear the thunderous beating of your heart nor the rattling zoo in your belly. Not only had you held her quiver, but Kate had also taught you how to shoot. She had kissed you at the archery range, more than once by that point. You thought that might mean something too, but hearing someone else saying it made you feel warm inside. Especially if that someone was Kate's best friend.

"It's a shame Kate doesn't do relationships, really. You'd make a cute couple. I would ship it."

And just like that, you could have sworn your heart stopped for a second. You forced a smile, immediately losing track of anything else the blonde said, all of the hopes and dreams you didn't know you had about Kate pulverized into smithereens.

Was that the reason you felt so strange over her sudden silence?

Your mind traveled back to game night. Nobody else noticed the change in her attitude because she didn't do anything out of the ordinary. Kate was just a little quieter than usual, but that also happened when she was completely focused on her game. It was the little things in her presence that gave it away, and you had only noticed it because you couldn't focus on anything else but Kate.

Fuck.

Was it possible that, despite your better judgment, you had fallen for the one person that could never love you back?

—

The archer shifted her weight from one foot to the other, anxiously waiting outside your classroom. Well, several feet away, hiding behind a bush, but near your classroom nonetheless. She took a look at the smartwatch on her wrist. 30 more minutes left of your class.

It had been a whole week of debating. Kate would still show up every day to pick you up after class but her brand new feelings were overwhelming, and having little to no experience with them, she simply didn't know what to do. She'd argue with herself for a while, before turning away five minutes before your class ended to alleviate all of her frustrations by striking the punching bag in her apartment. The bag was starting to come apart at the seams with how much she was using it lately.

Kate thought she could control how she felt at first. After that night at Yelena's, she tried to carry on with her life and your arrangement as if nothing was happening, but now that she was aware of her feelings, everything you did made her heart flutter and get her hopes up for something she couldn't have. Fully settled in her panic, her first reaction was to run away, keeping herself at a distance in an attempt to make her feelings fade away, as all things always did.

It obviously wasn't working. No matter how much Kate tried to focus solemnly on her upcoming competitions, being away from you only made her miss you, and you were the only thought that would never leave her mind.

Her body begged for your touch. Kate ignored it as much as she could, but there were nights when the yearning weighed so heavily on her chest that the only thing that could ease the sensation was basking in your embrace as much as possible. When Kate was in your arms, everything would feel right again. She would only leave in the morning before you woke up because if she didn't, she would tell you the truth. And Kate wasn't ready to do that yet.

Her smartwatch chirped, an alarm set to remind her she had fifteen minutes to decide. This was her last chance. Staying or leaving. Kate sighed, ocean eyes settling on the door at the end of the hall that separated you from her. She wanted to see you. More than anything, she wanted things to go back the way they were, fun and uncomplicated, you by her side. But she couldn't have that again.

Kate tightened her grip on the strap of her backpack, looking down at her boots.

She couldn't do it.

"Time to go," the brunette mumbled under her breath, shooting one last look at your classroom, the shadow of a figure that wasn't there before coming into her line of vision.

Kate turned her head, curious. It was a tall blonde woman, dressed in jeans and striped button-up with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows, casually leaning against the wall of a classroom across from yours while mindlessly scrolling through her phone.

Kate's stomach immediately dropped, fists clenching tightly. Just what she needed.

Sharon fucking Carter.

A million scenarios crossed Kate's mind, each worse than the last. Had you gotten back together with your ex? No, Kate wanted to believe you were better than to go back after everything you had gone through. Besides, it hadn't even been a week since the last time you had slept with Kate. It wasn't possible unless your arrangement was so casual that it meant nothing to you.

The monster with sharp teeth that tore her up the other night was back, kicking and screaming. Her fingers tingled, suddenly urging her to forget all of her fears and protect you. Keep Sharon as far away from hurting you again as she could. Before she could register what she was doing, Kate was marching towards your classroom.

"Carter, I didn't peg you as the type to be interested in psychology!" Kate exclaimed, shoving her hands into her pockets. "I thought you had to have feelings for that specific class."

Sharon looked up from her phone, immediately rolling her eyes when she saw the archer. "Bishop, what a displeasure. Not that it is any of your business but I'm waiting for Y/N."

"What could you possibly have to do with Y/N?" Kate clicked her tongue. "Last time I checked, you were the asshole that broke her heart."

"As I said, none of your business so, you know, get lost."

"It absolutely is my business. Y/N is my–" Kate trailed off, unsure of how to describe you. Friend? Lover? The person that made her knees go weak?

Sharon crossed her arms over her chest, smirking. "Don't even try, I know that rumor about you two is bullshit. She would never go out with someone like you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"What you heard. Y/N needs a lot more than what an emotionally unavailable spoiled brat has to offer."

The archer had to summon all of her willpower not to punch Sharon in the face. "Well, I can assure you it certainly is more than what the poor excuse of a prick with commitment issues she used to date ever did for her."

Sharon pushed herself off the wall, fixing her posture and standing tall in front of Kate, baby blue eyes sparkling with defiance. Sharon was slightly taller but Kate still stared right back with the same fire.

"At least she did want me, Bishop. Not sure you can say the same thing."

Your ex's words shouldn't have stung, but they did. Still, Kate pridefully lifted her chin, trying to seem unbothered.

"You don't know anything about me and Y//N, Carter."

Before any of the two could say anything else, the classroom door opened and a wave of students rushed out. Both women turned to the door, searching for you in the multitude. Kate could feel her nerves rising to the surface again, which had been long forgotten as she argued with Sharon. You were one of the last few to come out, a puzzled expression striking your features at seeing them together.

Kate's heart beat erratically against her ribcage.

Sharon was the first one to speak. "You're a sight for sore eyes, Y/N," she said with a charming smile, making Kate purse her lips in annoyance.

"What are you doing here?" The confusion was even present in your voice.

"I've been meaning to talk to you," Sharon explained, sounding overly sweet. "I would have done it sooner if it wasn't 'cause you seem to have a very irritating shadow." She sideyed Kate, who let out a snarky laugh. "I came to get you today because I thought you were done with her."

"I'm so very sorry to disappoint you," Kate snarled, stepping into your space and standing next to you, her hip slightly bumping with yours as she stared at Sharon with fury in her eyes.

"I think things were pretty clear last time we spoke, Sharon."

"I beg to differ," the blonde replied. "Come on, baby, let me take you out for dinner."

"She doesn't deserve a second of your time, Y/N."

"You don't know shit, Bishop, so why don't you just go play with your pointy sticks? Nobody wants you here," Sharon spouted. Kate clenched her teeth, the muscles in her throat tightening with the motion.

"I'll go do that but I promise you won't like it when I stick them up your–"

"Kate," you interjected, throwing her a warning look.

"Are you not listening to her? She's an absolute dic–"

"Katie."

The brunette turned to you as you placed your hand on her forearm, effectively ending her staring contest with Sharon. Her expression softened when her blue gaze met yours.

"Please."

Kate huffed in disbelief, shaking her head in disapproval and mumbling the word unbelievable under her breath. You softly rubbed her arm, silently trying to calm her down. You said nothing else for a moment, shooting Kate's nerves off the wall while Sharon kept her eyes on you, expectantly. The archer could almost see the gears turning in your head, pondering your options, which appalled her.

How could you even consider listening to whatever Sharon had to say after everything she had done? After everything between you and Kate?

Sharon noticed, too, or so Kate thought as the blonde flashed you a dazzling smile, and said, "I'll make it worth your while, I promise."

Kate knew your answer before you even said it. Your mouth opened and closed like a fish several times, and her stomach turned in swirls. Just like that day at Yelena's, Kate felt a crushing pressure on her chest, cutting off the air and making her lungs burn.

She should have left when she had the chance.

You turned to her, chewing on your lip. "I'll come find you after I talk to Sharon, okay?"

Better yet, she should have closed the door in your face when you showed up crying at her door when the woman standing in front of her with a triumphant smirk on her face broke your heart.

"Don't bother, it's fine."

Kate would have lost a friend then, instead of her heart.

—

The vibration of a bowstring firing an arrow cut through the evening silence with a vengeance, a loud thud filling the air with the strength behind the shot. Far to the left.

“Come on,” Kate exclaimed under her breath in frustration, pulling another arrow from her quiver and aiming at the same spot. She inhaled, letting the cool spring air fill her lungs before letting that arrow cut through the air again. It landed far to the right.

“Stop thinking about it, Bishop,” she muttered to herself, placing her bow and arrow in position. “Just…” she started, tensing the bowstring, “Let it go,” and finished her sentence with the sound of a flying arrow vibrating through the atmosphere.

Near the bullseye, but not quite.

The archer groaned, annoyed. She had her next competition in a few days–she couldn’t let her stupid feelings get in the way of another trophy. She had a reputation to maintain.

You watched the whole thing from a distance, not sure if you were ready to make your presence known yet.

You fucked up. You knew it from the moment you watched a furious Kate walk away, your heart following after her. You confirmed it when Sharon threw her arm around your shoulders like she used to do when you were dating, blabbering about something you didn't hear because you felt uncomfortable under her touch. Sharon kept on talking as you walked, and all you could think about was the hurt in Kate's eyes when she realized you were going to say yes to Sharon.

Truthfully, curiosity got the best out of you. Seeing her took you by surprise, especially when the looked so sure of herself when you hadn't spoken in months.

Sharon was never one to show up just like that. No, the blonde liked playing the long game, texting you out of nowhere to ask how you had been. Every other time you had broken up, she infiltrated your life little by little, charming her way back into your heart like the very first time. It was only when she was sure she had you that she would come forward. It was strange, out of the ordinary, and you just wanted to know what had changed.

It only occurred to you that her sudden interest had everything to do with the rumors about you and Kate when she proposed going to your favorite diner, the small one off-campus she called dingy and gross many times during your relationship despite knowing how much you loved it, and that everyone knew you now visited often with Kate.

The conversation didn't last too long after. You called her out, she got defensive, and told you that she couldn't fathom losing you to someone like Kate. You got into a fight, Sharon said all the things she would always say when she wanted you back and you saw right through her lies, kicking yourself internally for ever thinking having that conversation was worth it.

You had only lost your time, ruined your night, and hurt Kate in the process.

So, there you were, at the archery range late at night, collecting all of your courage to apologize to the furious archer who kept shooting with such strength you were afraid the target board was going to break in half.

“Goddamn it!” you heard Kate shout exasperated after another arrow failed to make the bullseye. She dropped the bow to the floor, making you jump, and she ran her anxious fingers through her hair.

You sighed. It was now or never.

"You're too tense," you spoke. "You need to lower your elbow a little bit."

Kate turned around at the sound of your voice, so many different feelings in the blue of her eyes your heart clenched inside your chest. Hurt, anger, disappointment. She had never looked at you that way. You hated it.

She didn't say anything, just stared holes into you for a while before turning to pick up her bow and collect the arrows pinned to the boards.

You continued your previous thought. "You know, the World's Greatest Archer gave me that advice, so it's pretty solid."

"What do you want?" Her voice was icy, unnerving.

"I came to apologize. I–"

"No need." Kate pulled another arrow and shot. Far to the left, again. "Now leave. I'm busy."

You licked your lips, uneasy. "I know I–"

"I saw what happened," another arrow, further to the right. "There's no need to explain."

"Katie, that's not–"

"It's Kate."

"Fine. Kate," You said in a shaky breath, trying so very hard to keep the tears at bay. "Please, just list–"

"No, you listen, Y/N," Kate said, turning back to you, her bow dropping to the floor again. "If you want to go back to Carter, go right ahead, I don't care. Just don't come knocking on my door when she hurts you again. I don't wanna hear it."

The wrath in her voice felt like a bucket of ice-cold water being thrown over your head, your heart shattered into a million pieces on the floor. You wanted to grab her face and kiss her, tell her you didn't want Sharon, that you wanted her, but the expression on her face told you that whatever was it that you had was over. So you needed to know.

"Why are you so angry if you haven't even talked to me in a week?"

Kate scoffed, turning her back to you. She pulled another arrow from her quiver and picked up her bow again, adjusting her position to fire once more. She took a deep breath, and squinted one eye, focusing directly on the center of the board.

You could almost swear she was picturing putting that arrow through your head.

"I'm not your girlfriend, Y/N. Never was. We just fucked. I don't have to explain myself to you."

She let go of the arrow.

Bullseye.

Taglist: @girlssnrosess @simpforflorencepugh1 @phantomvalkyriee @messuhp @dumbassbitchwithnotits @musicinourlips @chrisevanisliterallysir @imlike-so-gaydude @yaaskasey

#kate bishop #kate bishop x reader #kate bishop fic #kate bishop x yn #hawkeye series #kate bishop hawkeye #marvel fanfiction #kate bishop x female reader #kate bishop x you #writing #the effect you got on me #hawkeye fanfic #yelena belova x reader #sharon carter x reader

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