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lemonduckisnowawake · 13 days

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Against my better judgment, I'm posting a concept short story of vampire-christian (2.6k words. Gloriously unedited) I wrote literally yesterday because I think I'm hilarious. Here it is on WordPress if that's easier for some of you.

Actually, while I'm here, as I put on WordPress, ShamelessPlugin time of this kofi. NOT to give me money, by the way, but because I want to support a friend going on a short term missions trip (once that goal is reached, I'll refund the kofi, unless you specify not to). You can help them by sending me a kofi with a prompt or, if you prefer, donating directly to them here or reblogging the donation post I made here.

Anyway! What do I mean by concept short? It means probably not gonna remain canon-canon but it's something I write as basically an exposition dump to establish setting and possible dynamic with minimal narrative meat. So here you go. I love the attention but why must you kill my notes whenever I log on?

The problem with grabbing your blood in the hours no one else did—which is to say, in the burning daylight of afternoon, first day of the week—was that, sometimes, you would run into unexpected difficulties.

It wasn’t anything new to Armaros that the day’s fresh shipment of blood hadn’t arrived yet when he graced the building with his presence. After all, most humans and a good number of supernaturals did their work in the day, so there was no reason to deliver the shipment of fresh blood to the Vida en Bolsa building too early. Especially when most of the creatures who needed it came in after the sun set.

What was new, however, was that this was the time he’d had to wait with the only other person being the new receptionist.

Right now, she was scratching away at a notebook and typing something on the computer behind the reception desk in the small waiting room. It was what she was doing every time he came to Vida en Bolsa, which was every week.

Usually, their interaction would go something like:

“Hello…I’m here to receive my donation…”

“Good afternoon! Good to see you again, Armaros! Yep, your shipment of blood should be here, maybe being unloaded into the fridge, but name and DNI number?”

Short response here.

“Perfect! Just wait here and I’ll go grab it for you!”

He would mutter a thanks, give her the bag where he could carry his blood subtly, and watch as she skirted around the half-circle reception desk and ran to the door opposite far left of the entrance. Then, she’d come back and hand him the bag now heavy with a week’s worth of blood bags.

She’d mutter a cheery, “God bless you!” like it didn’t make Armaros flinch every time, and that would be it.

That was a good routine. Armaros wished that routine could always be kept.

But alas, this was Spain. And even after five-hundred years, the virtue of punctuality was one that they still sorely failed to improve on—maybe it had been a more punctual culture when he was still technically alive, but years in the present had made the far past fade somewhat.

Nevertheless, typical Spanish lateness had been the cause of the apologetic, “Looks like they’ll be late again with today’s shipment” from the receptionist.

Speaking of, actually, Armaros assumed that Chae-ryeong was a receptionist. Or maybe distributer to the beneficiaries would be the right word for it? She seemed to do quite a few other things, if the forms on her computer were anything to go by.

The problem was, every time he walked past the building—which was often, even when not stopping for blood—he would see her form sat at the desk. Daylight or twilight, she was just…there.

Armaros wondered if she ever slept or ate or took breaks. The woman had bags under her eyes as permanent as her half-smile. The hair Armaros assumed was supposedly to be the typical straight, black, and strong East Asian hair was always in a frizzy (and more often than not, greasy) mess. And truth be told, whenever he spoke with her, the scent of her blood seemed to sometimes lack the distinct iron quality that most healthy blood should possess, which wouldn’t be that alarming—anemia signs otherwise—except that she was specifically working at Vida en Bolsa.

Personality wise, Chae-ryeong was the perfect receptionist. Appearance wise, she looked like she’d been run over by one of the delivery trucks he sometimes spotted in the parking lot.

“Hm…” Chae-ryeong suddenly broke the silence.

Five-hundredish years of life had still not trained Armaros to not flinch at the sound of another human voice. Especially when the owner of the voice was looking at him looking at her.

He blinked back, fighting not to break his stare.

“Sorry, did you say something?” Armaros questioned her.

…why did I start a conversation? he yelled internally. Curse me…no. I’m already cursed. I can’t bless me either—wait, she’s saying something.

He could have just pretended to be asleep or something.

Chae-ryeong, still wearing her usual half-smile, shook her head. “No, not technically,” he caught her saying. “I was just wondering at you staring at me, but maybe you were just bored like I was?”

Well, yes. He was bored. But boring was good. Boring was silent and peaceful and—wait, why was she bored?

“…aren’t you working on something though?” he asked her, briefly eyeing the laptop next to her covered in a weird assortment of stickers.

“Well, yes…but it is rather boring,” Chae-ryeong easily replied, the picture of nonchalance. “It’s just some work for another thing I’m doing, anyway. So why were you staring at me? Or were you just bored?”

“I, uh…” Armaros stammered, trying to follow the gunshots of conversation. “I’m not bored? I was just…wondering if you ever slept, since I walk around the neighbourhood a lot and always see you at your desk.”

…that wasn’t rude to say, right?

“Ha! Come on. I’m twenty-four!” Chae-ryeong scoffed, grinning at Armaros. “Uh. I think. BUT ANYWAY! I still have, like, a year left before my brain starts deteriorating. Who needs sleep when you’re young!?”

Armaros wanted to argue that he was five centuries old and still very much needed sleep. But he was the vampire awake in broad daylight—the time he should be sleeping in. Plus, he didn’t know much about human biology now, so…

His mouth didn’t seem to agree with his brain, as he found himself muttering, “Uh…I don’t think that’s how it—never mind.”

“Nah, it’ll be great,” Chae-ryeong assured him. “But yeah…come to think about it, I do work an absurd amount of hours here, don’t I?”

The expectant eye she was giving Armaros withered him a little bit as he felt himself forced to continue the conversation. “Um…how come you work that long?”

Chae-ryeong huffed. “Well, my parents are friends of the managers of this branch of Vida en Bolsa. And after their last few receptionists quit on them, I offered to take the positions until they found someone...s new. It’s great. I can do my master’s homework, be surrounded by blood, talk with vampires that sometimes want to eat me, serve God in some form of ministry, and earn money. Lots of it, too, given how I’m working almost all the shifts.”

“That sounds…unhealthy,” Armaros commented, at loss at what to say.

Was that rude? Judging someone he barely knew?

“Oh, it absolutely is! But if I ever need a blood transfusion, at least I’ll be in good hands with the medics here!” was her cheerful reply.

It was then when Chae-ryeong shut her laptop.

Armaros wanted to die, except he was already dead. Her shutting her laptop means she’s invested in this conversation. Send help, he cried internally.

“That’s…not really what I meant—hey, are you anemic?” he suddenly asked, catching a whiff of her scent with his enhanced senses. “Oh, uh. I ask because you always smell slightly less…metallic than most people.”

The woman rested her arms on the desk, tapping her fingers and wheeling her chair slightly back and forth, attention all on him. “Ooh…so vampires can smell that. Some of the others who come in the night shift tell me that too, but yeah, I am.”

“Doesn’t that make working here…unsafe? Hungry vampires can be…” he trailed off, forgetting the word he wanted to use to express the state of hungry vampires. He sunk deeper in his chair, knowing he should just stand and make the short trek to one of the chairs nearer to the reception desk but…not wanting to.

Well, Chae-ryeong seemed comfortable where she was as well, atrocious posture and all. And she didn’t seem to mind their distance either as she bobbed her head. “Yep! But who ever said ministry was safe?”

“Erm…”

Armaros didn’t really get it, but Christians—Catholic, Orthodox, Protestant, whatever other thing there was these days that believed in the triune God and the cross and resurrection thing—they were a weird lot. After all, they were the first group to establish a blood donation system for the supernaturals who needed it despite their entire nature being lethal to his kind.

“Well…if it works for you, I guess,” he passively answered back.

“It does! I usually can take short naps during the slow hours. Most of the vampires already know me now and are nice enough to wake me up if I oversleep,” Chae-ryeong blissfully blabbered on.

“Can you even oversleep in your current lifestyle?” Armaros asked doubtfully.

“Yep! I usually get four good hours, but sometimes I overshoot to seven or eight from morning till afternoon!”

“…I see.”

“What about you? You’re pretty much the only Monday daylight regular,” Chae-ryeong offered him a question, something Armaros really hadn’t needed. “I mean, you say you see me when you stroll around, but I also see you a lot out in the sun. Isn’t that unsafe?”

“Yes…it is,” Armaros said, struggling to explain. “But…I enjoy taking walks…especially to stores. They’re never open in the night.”

“Ah…right. Why don’t you move to the nearby city, then?” Chae-ryeong suggested. Armaros noticed her head still bobbing slightly from earlier. “Places like Valencia have most of their establishments open at night for the nocturnal supernaturals. Smaller cities like ours don’t have lots of those, though I think we have a good number of them! I know the center has almost all the stores and the major groceries open in the twilight hours, at least.”

“…well, it’s not something that appealed to me.”

“Makes sense to me!” Chae-ryeong accepted easily.

They lapsed into silence, with Armaros aware that Chae-ryeong was looking at him, as if desperately wanting to ask a question. Sometimes, he wished he hadn’t become more aware of social cues…

“Sorry. I’m not great with conversations,” he said. “But…do you want to ask something?”

Chae-ryeong perked up, at least as much as one could without changing the permanent expression on their face. “Actually, yeah! But it might be rude…most of the vampires I’ve asked weren’t really willing to answer…or even let me ask when I mentioned it pertained to Christianity. Can I ask it anyway?”

No???

“Sure…this is a mission, after all.”

Why was he this way?

Well, she seemed happy at the allowance? Maybe? Again. Hard to tell.

“To be honest, I just kind of am curious about how the whole Christianity thing and vampires works. I know vampires stay away from churches and the whole lot because, well, it literally hurts their very being. But like…I don’t know. A vampire classmate and friend of mine were talking and she’s always wondered how things would have gone if she’d lived during the time of Christ and had bit Him, capital H.”

…I’m having hearing issues, right? Armaros told himself. There was no way the receptionist had just—

He straightened, if only to lean forward and ask the woman, “Sorry?”

“…it’s a weird question, isn’t it?” Chae-ryeong acknowledged. And if she wasn’t wearing her polite half-smile, it would have sounded apologetic, but she was wearing it and the acknowledgment sounded too…nonchalant?

“I, uh…no. I’m really asking,” Armaros said, just to save himself the trouble of trying to admit anything.

“Oh, then my question was about—well, I don’t know if you believe in God, actually. But Christian items still hurt you, right? So…say you do. What would have happened if you had bitten Jesus Christ while He lived and drunk His holy blood.”

…huh.

This was a bit of a belated observation, but the new receptionist—new being relative given that she’d already been here for nearly two months—was insane, wasn’t she?

“I, uh…well.”

Chae-ryeong nodded in understanding. “Yeah. That’s about the response of the other vampires willing to consider the question.”

She didn’t seem disappointed, either. If anything, she looked resigned. And Armaros dearly wanted to ask, “Resigned to what?! What are you resigned to?! What kind of crazy question is that, woman? I just want my week’s worth of blood, please! Please don’t make me change to a 42-days shipment order!”

But he didn’t say any of that because he knew better.

Rather, Armaros did his best to sit back properly and meet Chae-ryeong’s curious dark eyes, glinting in the summer evening sunlight with…something expectant, maybe? With that, he found his mouth opening without his permission again.

“Well, most vampires believe in God. The ones who don’t, uh…don’t really end up living that long, to be honest. Some out of spite, others because they don’t really…take precautions for their safety. Some are still alive, I mean,” Armaros explained, feeling more and more self-conscious and doing his best not to pray (lethal idea) for the blood delivery truck to come already.

“The thing is, we don’t have…faith in God, you know? That might kill us, after all,” Armaros explained. His smile wasn’t too strained, was it? “So we just…I mean. I’ve never thought of that question? Maybe it would have killed us? I mean, I’m pretty sure a true Christian’s blood is lethal to us, so—”

“Wait, what?” Chae-ryeong interrupted him, her smile dropping for the first time in the conversation.

The change in expression was enough to throw Armaros into silence.

She didn’t seem to mind, as she continued. “What was that about Christians’ blood being lethal to a vampire?”

The question was enough to prompt the vampire to speak again, stammering out, “Uh…oh. Um. Yeah. Cause…I think it’s some theological principle?” He honestly knew even less about it.

A lightbulb seemed to light up over Chae-ryeong’s head, or maybe that was the setting sun—hang on, didn’t that mean it was nearly 9PM?

Armaros subtly tried to glance at the big owl-shaped clock on the wall in the reception area, which did confirm his suspicion that he’d been here almost an hour and a half.

“Well, huh…I guess now I know why that threat worked,” he thought he heard Chae-ryeong mutter to herself.

That…definitely didn’t sound like it was meant to be said aloud, so he simply decided to let it go.

“Hello?” another voice startled them out of their musings.

They both turned to the speaker, a woman who looked to be in her late thirties—brown hair, Mediterranean complexion, healthy blood, maybe recently sick, also carrying a clipboard.

Chae-ryeong’s smile immediately returned as she waved out her greeting. “Hi, Sandra! How are you?”

The woman smiled at Chae-ryeong, slightly false but not unkindly. “Very tired. Sorry about the delivery being so late today. Do you want some help unloading it?”

“Oh, sorry to hear that. I hope you can go home to rest.”

“I know I will!”

“And now, don’t worry about unloading. Carla, Leo, and Adele are already taking care of it, see?”

Three pairs of gazes turned outside to see an older woman and two youths in their twenties starting to unload crates from the white and red truck parked just in front of the entrance. One of the women—Adele, Armaros recognized from her dirty blonde hair—waved when she spotted their gazes.

Armaros just stared ahead, like he hadn’t seen them.

Honestly, he didn’t think he could take any more interaction at this point. Thank…not God. But thank goodness that he could now move on from this evening.

“Armaros, do you want your blood delivery now?” Chae-ryeong’s voice interrupted his relief.

He tensed again and nodded. “Thanks, yes.”