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#thank goodness he's a free event sr
fragrantpines · 1 year
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YANGZHOU HONEYYYYYYY 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
Everyone go check out the new trailer for the next event!!! The quality this time is (chef kiss) b e a u t i f u l
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shes-homeward-bound · 2 years
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Crash and Burn | Chapter 8
Summary: You’re the first female driver to compete in the Formula 1 World Championship in decades and it's your second year of navigating through a male-dominated sport. Your talent and drive to prove yourself made you vicious on the grid. Your seemingly unshakeable confidence was never questioned- until a certain Ferrari driver made you crash and burn.
Pairing: Carlos Sainz Jr. x Reader
Chapters: 8/?
Warnings: swearing, angst, car accidents
Word Count: 6.1k
Posted on: 9/23/2022
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A/N: Hi guys! it's been a while since I updated but I finally have ch8 for you! I just started a new job and it took me a while to get adjusted but I'm back. Please feel free to comment! I love hearing what you guys have to say. I also wanted to remind you that this is fiction, not an actual depiction of their character. Enjoy!
Chapter 8
The days to the next race weekend were busy but time felt like it dragged on. The pictures you and Carlos posted on your social media accounts were well received by the fans. When the racing teams posted various photos of you and Carlos in the paddock or your race suits, that seemed to do the trick because half of the negative articles suddenly had a positive narrative on your relationship. Fans were making ship names and calling you the ultimate F1 couple. Seeing all that positive feedback should have delighted you but it was hard to enjoy when you and Carlos weren’t even talking. The only people who knew you were fighting were yourselves, your performance coaches, and the only drivers that knew were Charles and Lando.
You were back in your apartment in England and training hard in both the simulator and the gym. Mentally, you were not okay. Your body was used to all the dopamine due to all the good things that were going on with Carlos. Anna told you that Carlos was probably feeling the same way, maybe even worse and for some reason, that gave you some solace. There were times when you almost picked up the phone and called him but you were glad you didn’t. It was Carlos who was at fault, he shouldn’t be angry at you for the mistakes he made. 
Carlos was used to living by himself but the random things you accidentally left behind reminded him of how much he enjoyed your presence. Your skincare was still in his bathroom and finding hair ties randomly throughout his apartment. When Ferrari didn’t need Carlos for testing, he flew back to Madrid hoping his family had answers to help him. When Carlos told his parents about his fight with you and what he was feeling, it was not well received. Reyes threw her hands up in the air and left the room muttering about her idiotic son and for the first time, Carlos Sr. looked at his son in disappointment. His father’s intense glare crushed Carlos but he knew he deserved it for hurting you. His sisters were livid and texted you attempting to apologize for him. You thanked them for being supportive but insisted you needed to hear his words.
Days went by and you finally found yourself on your way to Miami. The majority of the drivers were already there but you delayed as long as you could. You knew it gave you less time to get used to the time difference but at the moment, you couldn’t bare to face Carlos. Since it was the first-ever Miami Grand Prix, it was going to be a long week filled with events. That also meant you were going to need to spend time with Carlos in the public eye which was going to be challenging due to the fact you kind of wanted to punch him. The PR director sent an email over with suggestions on how the both of you should act now that your relationship was no longer a secret. She advised that a small amount of PDA was okay, the goal was to show that your relationship was legitimate and not some stupid plot to steal secrets from Ferrari. 
You had just settled into your hotel room, unpacking your clothes and making it feel like home when you heard a knock on your door. Looking through the peephole, you see Lando with flowers in one hand and a bag of food in the other. You grinned as you opened the door for him. Lando had been such a good friend to you in the past week, acting as a liaison between you and Carlos. Lando thought that Carlos was in the wrong and desperately wanted his good friends to stop fighting. He tried to reason with Carlos but, his old teammate was as stubborn as ever. 
Lando promptly places the flowers on the coffee table and unpacks the food. “Has Carlos talked to you yet?”
You let out a long sigh. “No, he hasn’t. Lando, I don’t what to do. How can we act like a normal couple when we haven’t even talked in a week? I refuse to reach out, he’s the one who needs to apologize.”
“I fully agree with you y/n but you have to understand that Carlos is incredibly hard-headed. I’ve known Carlos longer than you and he is extremely goal-driven, he will do anything to get that world championship. His intensity can cloud his judgment, I think he truly believes that you are the main reason for his failures this season.”
You rolled your eyes. “He’s being ridiculous. My anxiety spikes whenever I hear an incident from Ferrari but I don’t let that affect my racing!”
Lando looks at you with amusement. “I think you underestimate how much he likes you. If we’re not talking about racing, you’re all he talks about. Y/n this. Y/n that. He’s whipped and doesn’t know how to handle it.” 
You cross your arms and squint at Lando as you gauge whether or not he was telling the truth.
“Really?” 
“Really.”
This information should have made you more furious but you could feel yourself soften as you started to understand how your boyfriend’s brain worked. It still made no logical sense to you but you were starting to discover what a type-A goal-driven person was like. Despite your new realizations, Carlos would need to step up and apologize before you could even think to forgive him. 
*******
The energy of the crowd was electrifying. Even in your stressed-out state, it was hard not to enjoy the festivities that came with the Miami Grand Prix. As you and Sebastian made your way to the opening ceremony, you spotted the familiar Ferrari red. Carlos’s eyes grew once he saw you, it felt like a year since he’s seen you, and was glad to see you looking well. On the other hand, you noticed that Carlos was looking more disheveled than usual. He looked tired and was sporting a few days of scruff on his face. You had the strongest urge to take his face in your hands and tease him about his facial hair but then you remembered why you couldn’t let yourself do that.
You realized that cameras were already trained on you so you mustered a grin and give Carlos a quick hug before walking side by side. 
Carlos looks at you in surprise so you sidle up to him and whisper, “I’m still mad at you but we have to do this for the cameras.”
Carlos wraps his arm around your shoulder and places his lips by your ear. “We’ll be the perfect couple,” said Carlos curtly. 
Carlos had no idea what to feel. At the moment he was extremely frustrated with you and himself but having you in his arms seemed to have calmed him down. You were also feeling the effect of having Carlos hold you so close, your anger tapered as you both walked to the event as a horde of people photographed and filmed every move. 
The opening ceremony was a success and you and Carlos were able to dodge any controversial questions. Most of your interactions with Carlos were physical rather than verbal. Carlos was afraid he’d say something that would make you angrier and you were scared that you’d start a spontaneous fight in public so you both communicated through touch. When you were backstage with all the drivers, there would be a light tap on the back or a casual arm over your shoulder. 
The other drivers who didn’t know about your relationship helped sell the happy couple image you needed to portray. George was over the moon and would loudly express his approval of your relationship whenever he was close by and you both fed off his energy. Max commented on you being too good for Carlos and to his annoyance, you may have laughed a little too hard. But Lewis’s reaction was filled with so much wisdom that it stunned you both. Lewis with his kind smile said that he was sorry to see the media target me so harshly. He told you and Carlos to keep your heads up and stick together because people will always have something to say, especially with you being the only female driver. Lewis looked at both of you in the eyes and said to remember why you choose each other despite knowing it would be a difficult road ahead.
You don’t know about Carlos, but that comment hit you hard. You knew that dating Carlos was going to be challenging but you still choose to be with him. Without thinking, you automatically reached over and held out your hand, and to your surprise, Carlos’s had already met yours, and for a moment, you felt like everything was going to be okay.
******
You were waiting in line to sit down and do the usual Thursday press conference with a couple of other drivers. You and Carlos were waiting in line together and your nervous foot tapping must’ve annoyed him to the point that he broke the silent treatment you resumed with each other.
“Y/n! Can you stop that?”
You shifted your legs. “Sorry, just nervous.” 
“We’ll be fine! We just have to act like everything is okay,” said Carlos. 
If looks could kill, Carlos would be dead on the floor.
“Sure! I’ll just pretend everything is okay while some asshole journalist is asking you if you think I’m using you to steal secrets from Ferrari,” you said sarcastically. 
The comment effectively shut him up. Carlos’s attempt at comforting you had failed and wanted to smack himself for saying the wrong thing again. He could only hope his stupidity didn’t make you hate him. He thought you two were making some sort of progress the night before.
It was either a blessing or a curse that you and Carlos were put at the same press conference but it was probably purposefully done to avoid any misinformation to spread. You were glad Daniel was going to be in this press conference because he was one of the drivers who publically supported you on social media. It gave you some relief that you had someone on your side who was ready to defend if it became too much for you and Carlos. 
Once the group before was done, you tried your best to not look like you were on the verge of a nervous breakdown. You reminded yourself that you are y/n l/n, you were outgoing and had impeccable skills that could handle the media. After your little pep talk, you lead the group into the room, and the moment you sat down, you could feel that confidence diminish. Every single reporter was staring at you like you were a rare mystical gem that was waiting to be poked and prodded. As expected, they started the conference on the other end which meant they were saving you, the best for last. 
The questions they asked the other drivers were either about the new track or modifications to the cars. When the reporter got to Carlos, you and the other drivers tensed up, afraid they would ask him about the Ferrari and Aston Martin scandal. To your surprise, they only asked him how he felt about his DNF in Italy and how he has prepared himself for the race on Sunday. 
When the questions got to you, you had a feeling they weren’t going to ask you about the new developments in your car.
“Y/n! How are you liking Miami so far?”
“It’s so exciting to be here in this new track! This city is so vibrant and full of different cultures, I can’t think of a better place to host a Grand Prix.”  
“That’s lovely to hear! Let’s throw it back to the Imola where you had an eventful couple of days. You went from celebrating an amazing race and podium to being in the middle of a scandal with Ferrari. How are you dealing with these accusations?”
You noticed Carlos straighten up and your colleague's visibly freezing as they anticipated your answer.
Taking in a deep breath, you smiled at the reporter. “Well, there is no scandal between Ferrari and me, those accusations of me stealing information from Ferrari are simply not true. I’m not going to lie, dealing with the accusations has been hard but I know the truth and the teams know the truth. I take my job seriously, my good results are a reflection of the hard work my team and I put into the sport.”
The reporter was satisfied with your answer but another journalist in the back did not like the diplomatic response you gave. 
“Maybe there is no scandal but that doesn’t change the fact that Carlos’s performance has dropped ever since the two of you were spotted spending time with each other,” blurted out the journalist. “The timeline of your relationship coincides with Carlos’s DNFs. Do you think your relationship is negatively affecting Carlos? You and your team must be benefitting from Ferrari’s misfortunes. Do you think it’s fair to use your body to gain an advantage in the circuit?”
With a smug look on his face, the journalist turned to Carlos. “How could you let a pair of tits affect you this much?”
Your jaw dropped and the room erupted in chaos. A series of “whoah” reverberated throughout the room knowing the man had crossed the line. It was not within their characters but when you saw Carlos and Daniel abruptly stand from their chairs, you knew that they were furious. Valtteri and George had to hold them back before they could get to the journalist. You sat there stunned, feeling angry and embarrassed that someone had said those awful words to you. It was bad enough when you read what people said about you but to hear it was disgusting. You wanted to hide as you watched Daniel and the journalist spew words at each other as security personnel escorted the journalist out of the room. 
You could barely keep your tears in when you decided you couldn’t stand to be in the room any longer. Getting up from your chair, you calmly walked out of the camera frame and practically ran out and weaved your way through the paddock. You had just entered Aston Martin hospitality before tears flooded your vision, you blindly made your way to your private room and shut the door before crumpling into a heaping mess. 
*******
Furious was an understatement for what Carlos was feeling. He was livid and on the brink of violence. He was not the type to fight but Carlos had never wanted to punch someone as much as he did at that moment. He was seeing red by the time the journalist had finished talking. Not only was the journalist rude to him, but he had also disrespected you in the most vulgar way. He saw you leave but ultimately decided that he needed to stay and try to fix the mess. 
Carlos picked up his microphone and looked directly at the camera. The room settled down after seeing Carlos stoically waiting for the talking to stop. They could tell the Ferrari driver was not happy.
“These comments about Aston Martin trying to steal from Ferrari has to stop. The accusations of Y/n using me to steal from Ferrari need to stop. Y/n L/n is one of the best drivers on the grid and has one of the most promising careers we will ever see in the history of our sport. Whatever happens to me and my car can only be blamed on myself and the team. There is no need to blame Y/n or Aston Martin. Why don’t we all drop the unnecessary drama and get ready for the race weekend, no?”
With his heart pounding, he placed the mic on his seat and walked out of the room. Finding a vacant hallway, Carlos leans on a wall and takes a deep breath. His mind spun as he reflected on what just happened. He remembered solely looking at you as the first reporter asked you questions. You were so good at keeping your appearance professional but he realized how well he could read you. He saw your eyebrow twitch and he just knew that you were upset but was hiding it under a friendly demeanor. When the asshole journalist started talking, he saw that all too familiar look of pure shock and outrage that your eyes could convey.
The moment the man suggested you were using your body was when Carlos snapped. Now that he had time to analyze things, he realized how stupid your fight was. He should’ve apologized the day you found out and he should have been by your side these past few weeks.
He made his way to Aston Martin hospitality to find Anna sitting on the ground by your door. She notices Carlos and pats the space next to her.
"Is she okay?"
“She won’t open the door for me, so she probably won’t open it for you," said Anna. "It's best to leave her alone, all we can do is let her know we're here to help and let her come to us."
Anna and Carlos waited in silence until Carlos couldn’t stand listening to his thoughts.  "Anna, I have been an idiot."
"You just realized that?"
Carlos gave her a look before he continued. “Before I left the conference, I gave a statement to the public.”
“What did you say?”
“I told them to stop the accusations. I told them that Y/n shouldn’t be blamed for my mistakes,” said Carlos. “How am I any different from that journalist? He blamed her for my mistakes, just like I did.”
Carlos paused, doing his best to communicate what he was feeling. “My biggest dream is to be a world champion, I’ve been working so hard for so long and I was so frustrated that I blamed her. My number 1 priority is my career and that was working so well for me last year, but when I decided to let someone in my life, my career takes a hit. I didn’t want to face the truth that my own mistakes or the team's misfortunes would ruin my chance of a title. At the time, blaming y/n was what made sense but now, I just sound like the dumbest guy in the world.”
Carlos propped his arms on his knees and covered his face in frustration. “I failed her. When things were bad, she was always there to support me but where was I when she was receiving death threats? Where was I when the media was accusing her of cheating? I didn’t try hard enough to protect her, I should’ve addressed the public from day one. I should’ve told her that she makes my life significantly better and maybe the reason why I’m making mistakes is that I can’t handle the idea of y/n getting hurt.”
Anna pats his shoulder in an attempt to console the Ferrari Driver who was going through an emotional breakdown. “Carlos, you need to tell y/n everything you just told me.”
“I don’t know how I can face her after everything I’ve said and done. I always say the wrong things at the wrong time. I swear I'm one strike away from y/n breaking up with me.” said Carlos.
Anna chuckled. “Start by apologizing and then tell her everything you just told me.”
Carlos gets a text from his manager telling him that he was needed for more Ferrari obligations, he thanks Anna and tells her to make sure you knew he waited for you outside the door for as long as he could. 
A few minutes after Carlos left, Anna heard your door creak open and saw your red splotchy face peek out of the room.
“How are you? Feeling better?”
You shrugged. “I had a good cry so I guess I do feel better.”
Anna gives you a sympathetic smile. “Carlos was waiting out here with me, he just left a few minutes ago. Y/n, you should talk to him. I think you’ll want to hear what he wants to say.”
“I heard everything.”
“Oh? Why didn’t you come out?”
You bit your lip as joined Anna who was still sitting on the floor. “I planned on never forgiving Carlos… but now, I don’t know. It took Carlos a couple of weeks to realize that he was wrong, I can’t just forgive him the moment he feels sorry.  He essentially blamed me for ruining his chance for the championship, I can’t just go and run into his arms even though I want to. What does that say about me? What happened to my principles?
Anna sighs and gives you a wistful smile. “If you’re willing to forgive him after everything, it must mean you have stronger feelings for him than you realize. Do you love him?”
“What? No- I mean, I don’t think so,” you said as your voice rose in pitch. “We’ve barely been together for two months, I like him but I can’t possibly love him at this point.”
“You’re a driver, everything about your life is fast and intense. You have a dangerous profession and you found someone that truly understands what you go through. You may not love him yet but you’re starting to.”
You stared at Anna as your heart pounded at the thought.
*******
After having that eye-opening conversation with Anna, your anxiety was through the roof. You felt that awful anxiety-induced gut feeling and it became worse every time you thought about your feelings for Carlos. You were going through some startling self-realizations, you prided yourself in being a strong, level-headed woman but the idea of you forgiving him so easily did not sit right with you. Anna urged you to talk to Carlos but you were scared your resolve would crumble once Carlos looked at you with those warm brown eyes that you missed.
Free practices 1 and 2 had finished and you managed to get back to your hotel room without running into Carlos. You spent the majority of the day wearing your helmet with your visors down or using large sunglasses to hide your puffy eyes. You couldn’t give your haters and that journalist the satisfaction that they succeeded in making you cry. You had given your phone to Anna and told her to give it back to you only if anyone in your family called. The incident at the press conference sent the Formula One world into a frenzy. The majority of the population was on your side but of course, there was still a group of people who wholeheartedly agreed with the journalist. Anna told you that Carlos had tried to contact you multiple times but you couldn’t face him yet.
You usually loved qualifying, you loved that nerve-wracking rush of just sending it and putting everything you had into a few laps. But this time, you were experiencing the worst migraine in your life and you wanted nothing more than qualifying to end. Every turn felt like someone hitting your head with a brick and you were incredibly nauseous. You managed to get through Q1 but by the time the mechanics rolled you into the garage, you were in tears and you didn’t even bother hiding it. You waved the strategist and team principal over to you and you told them of your situation. The strategist suggested that they retire the car because he was worried about how safe it was for you to continue to drive. You refused and said that the team has worked too hard for you to quit, you told them that you would at least make it to the end of Q2. 
You were the first one out of the garage at the start of Q2, your goal was to get fast enough laps so you would place higher in the grid-like 11th or 12th because you knew you weren’t going to last till Q3. In your desperation to stop driving, you drove as fast and as precisely as you could under the conditions of the extreme pain and nausea you were feeling. After receiving news of decent lap times, you hoped that would be enough to place you in a decent grid position.
“Ben? Mike?” your voice cracked as you called out to your bosses. “I need to box.”
A few seconds later, your concerned strategist's voice emerged from the static. “You did great y/n. Box, box, box.”
You slowly went down the pitlane and the moment you were parked, you stumbled out and ripped your helmet off. You were well aware that cameras were trained on you due to your premature stop but you couldn’t even care due to the state you were in. You crouched and had the overwhelming urge to throw up as your body started dry-heaving. Your pit crew was initially in shock as they saw the driver they adored practically convulsing in front of them but quickly used their bodies to block the cameras from capturing you looking so vulnerable. With the help of Anna and your strategist, you were led to the paddock's makeshift hospital where a doctor was waiting for you. 
After an hour of examinations and some strong pain medication, your migraine was finally bearable and you were able to talk without feeling like you were going to vomit all over the place. Your team principal was updating you on what the starting grid was going to be like tomorrow when the doctor came in with papers in hand. 
“Good news, nothing major is wrong with you so you can race tomorrow if your migraine goes away. Bad news, I’m guessing from recent events you have been mentally and physically stressed. What you experienced today was a badly timed tension migraine and the only cure for that is to get rid of your stressors.”
You chuckled as your mind flashed to memories you’d had in the last couple of weeks. “I’m working on that doc.”
Glad that you were given the “all clear” to race tomorrow, your team principal leaves you to rest some more. You were closing your eyes when you heard people shuffled into the room. You open your eyes to see half of the grid had come to check in on you. You sheepishly greet the boys as you thanked them for seeing you. The entire time the drivers were in the room, Carlos just sat on a nearby chair and just quietly observed you interacting with the boys. Once in a while, you would look over at him, wondering why he was so quiet. After a few minutes, the drivers left one by one until it was just you and Carlos.
“I want to sleep off the rest of this migraine in my hotel room. Do you mind driving me?”
“I wouldn’t mind at all.” 
Carlos helps you up from the clinic bed and you slowly made your way out of the makeshift hospital and into the paddock. Carlos notices you swaying a little so he puts a steady hand on your back and with no hesitation, you grip his shoulder and leaned in for support. The entire way to the parking lot, you stayed like that as reporters with their cameras followed you snapping pictures. By then, Aston Martin would have released a statement of why you ended your qualifying short. You knew this just gave you more unwanted attention but at that moment, you didn’t care. You just wanted to go to sleep and were grateful that Carlos was there to help you. 
The entire drive to your hotel was silent, you and Carlos both had things to say but neither of you was unsure of how to start. You kept glancing at him and he kept looking at you. The moment Carlos parked the car, he took a deep breath and gathered his courage.
“After qualifying, I went to look for you, and then I saw on the tv screens replaying a video of you stumbling out of your car and all of your mechanics running towards you. My heart stopped, y/n. You have no idea how much you affect me.”
“I know,” you said as you looked at him with tired eyes. “That conversation you had with Anna? I heard everything.”
“Then you know how sorry I am about everything. I was wrong and I never should have blamed you. I am so sorry y/n, I will never let you down again.”
A few tears escape as you scanned Carlos’s face. He was looking distraught and unkempt with the stubble he was currently sporting. 
“I am so sorry” repeated Carlos.
“I believe you but Carlos, you left me to deal with everything by myself. I don't know how I can forgive you.”
Carlos immediately started shaking his head. He wished with all his might that your next words weren’t what he thought you were going to say.
“I need time, just let me think about it.”
Carlos lets out a shaky breath. “Take all the time you need.”
“Let’s both focus on tomorrow's race and once that’s done, we’ll have that long overdue talk. Does that sound good?”
With his heart pounding in his chest he merely nodded. This is it thought Carlos. He was sure you were going to break up with him for good. Carlos wanted to say more but looking at the state you were in, he agreed that it would be best to talk about your relationship after the race.
As Carlos watched you walk into your hotel, he clung to the hope that this wouldn’t be the end of your relationship. You were right, he left you when you were most vulnerable and if roles were reversed, he knew he would feel the same.
*******
You woke up bright and early feeling extremely refreshed. The migraine was gone and you resumed your usual race day routine. While you were doing yoga with Anna, you kept replaying Carlo’s apology in your head. You knew he was genuine but you were glad you told him that you needed time to think about his forgiveness. You needed time to come to terms with your feelings for him. When you had breakfast with Pierre, it took all your focus and energy to pay attention to him because your mind would immediately stray to whether or not you’d forgive Carlos. 
By the time you were putting on your fireproof suit, you were feeling like your normal self. You opted to get ready Dani Ric style with a set of huge headphones and a great playlist. You would wave to other drivers and fans but only talked to members of your team. Despite not making it to Q3, your times were fast enough to place you 11th on the grid. You were doing an amazing job of pushing your problems with Carlos aside and focusing on performing well. You were determined to get that podium today, in your eyes, it was the best “fuck you” to anyone who had been doubting and hating you in the last couple of weeks. You had to show your team and the rest of the world that you were capable despite being under extreme stress.
With rock’n’roll blaring through your headphones, you and Anna were doing some stretches and reaction tests near your car. You had a few minutes until the national anthem so you used that time to sit by a barricade and close your eyes to manifest what you wanted for the race when suddenly, loud cheering cut through your music. You look up to see Carlos looking down at you with a hopeful smile. You see his mouth move but heard nothing come out.
You ripped your headphones off. “What did you say?”
Carlos’s cheeks redden. “I said that you look much better. I see you’re racing so that means your migraine is completely gone?”
You nodded. “Yup, I’m good as new.”
Carlos steps closer, “I know you didn’t want to talk until after the race but I felt like I needed to come by and check on you myself.”
You looked at him apprehensively before you realized he was genuine. You didn’t know why you were surprised by the statement, you and Carlos were technically still together. Before you could respond, Carlos held up his hand and stuck his pinky out.
“It is tradition.”
You hooked your pinky with him and the stands that were closest to you went wild, you laughed as he sheepishly waved to the fans. You were then instructed to line up for the American national anthem and as the music played, you couldn’t help but think of how endearing it was that Carlos chose to uphold your tradition. 
As you kept sneaking looks at Carlos who was situated in the row in front of you, Carlos was mentally panicking as he over-analyzed the interaction you just had. He was scared that you were upset with him for not giving you the space you requested. Once the anthem was done and the drivers dispersed, you and Carlos had this moment where time froze. The look you both gave each other was something that could only be exchanged by two people who truly cared for each other. Carlos had this sense of vulnerability that you picked up right away and without a second thought, you reach for his hand.
“We’re going to be okay,” you whispered. “Drive fast, I'll see you at the end of the line.” 
Carlos’s mind reeled. He barely stuttered out a “good luck” before you walked towards your car. A slow smile started appearing on both of your faces, and for the first time, you and Carlos were eager for a Grand Prix to end.
*******
Your driving was phenomenal, by lap 36, you were in P7 chasing down Lewis Hamilton. The crowd went wild as you pulled a maneuver in one of the turns and managed to get ahead of the Mercedes. This was the best driving you’ve done all year but you couldn’t celebrate yet because the medium tires you started with were already heavily degraded due to the Miami heat. Your engineer called you to box to change into hard tires. You knew you would fall back a few positions but you were so focused and in your element, it would be no problem to gain back those positions. By the time you got your hard tires up to temperature, you were back in P6 and were hunting down George in the other Mercedes. 
“How many more laps until I can try and overtake George?”
“With your current pace, striking distance is in 5 laps.”
“Let’s make it 4 laps,” you said as you pressed the throttle.
“Y/n,” warned your engineer. “Watch out for overheating, you’re starting to push the car too hard.”
You didn’t respond as you pushed on the accelerator a little harder than before. You wanted that podium, especially after everything that happened, you needed it. Just like you intended, you were able to pull a move on George in 4 laps and successfully overtake him. Ben and Mike congratulate you but they give you another engine warning. 
“Y/n, you need to slow down a bit, temps are too hot. I know you want that podium but that can’t happen if the power unit shuts down.”
You slowed down but not enough to the point you were in any danger of George overtaking you. You were currently P5 and saw that P4 was within your grasp. With Perez only 3 seconds ahead of you, your tunnel vision returned. Your engineer's warnings were long forgotten as you chased down the Red Bull. You were both approaching a DRS zone and you knew you could get yourself close enough to overtake. It would be extremely difficult but if you pushed hard enough, you knew you could do it.
Formula One drivers are known as daredevils. They know their profession is dangerous and they will do anything to win, sometimes it means they’ll cross a line that never should’ve been crossed. 
You pushed and pushed and were finally able to get close enough to activate your DRS. What you didn’t anticipate was Checo’s rear wheels to lock up and spin, and because you were too close to him, you were headed straight to his sidepod. Your reflexes kicked in and you swerved but, at that speed, the margin of error was high. Your rear tire skidded over the Red Bull’s front wing and suddenly, you were flying and heard the grinding screech of asphalt and gravel scraping against the halo above you. Your screams were cut short as your car collided with the barrier. The last thing you remembered was the sharp pain in your chest as darkness crept into your vision.
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ad-hawkeye · 3 months
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Hello!! I need some help! I'm (attempting) to write about Alkaid as a character and since I intend to have sources, that means I need screenshots and.. sometimes I miss important ones! Especially since I started Lovebrush at the end of the Hunting Event and am missing a lot of cards. For modern Alkaid, I recall you mentioning his perfectionism a lot. That's something I want to talk about. I have a phone call of his saved, but do you have more? Thanks!! And cheers :-)
oh my god okay, okay, okay HELLO HI. I GOT YOU. sorry for the late reply!!! i've been compiling screenshots and WOW it took me a while only to compile a few notable moments. i hope this helps!!?! please feel free to ask me any questions i LOOOVE RAMBLING. also please link me this meta when you're done <3 i love meta.
to start off - is this the phone call you're talking about?
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if so, this is a good one. it also notes that alkaid is striving for "perfection" which. lol. okay alkaid.
then there's his base game SR card story stargazer in the "facade" category. the ending is the most notable part here.
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and then of course we have princess day. this is one of the biggies, i think. having someone just perceive him from an outsiders perspective is very. illuminating, lmfao.
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this trend of alkaid practicing something for hours just to get good at it pops up a couple times. i remember him "studying" the theme park map even though mc was the one to invite him. which. oh my god how did you make hanging out a homework assignment.
here's another misc example where you see him slip briefly and go "oh shit".. the valentines event. his perfectionism plays a heavy part in how he keeps his walls up around mc and attempts to be "perfect" for her which. won't be able to keep that up forever bud.
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this is especially notable in the nightingale epilogue where he's afraid of upsetting mc....... even when he thinks he's in a dream.
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i know there's more, i'm just. blanking so hard. i also know from my vague knowledge of the cn server that this def gets addressed in the future and that it's something that alkaid consistently struggles with. he's just like me fr <3
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mysteryshoptls · 1 year
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SR Epel Felmier Masquerade Dress Personal Story: Part 2
"It was a great shop!"
(Part 1) Part 2
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[City of Flowers – Topsy-Turvy Event Hall]
Malleus: Shall I place it here?
Epel: Y-Yes…
[thud!]
Stall Owner: I wasn't expecting you to lift up the whole truck and carry it all at once… Magic sure is amazing.
Epel: Well, I mean, I think Malleus-san is really the only one who can do this sort of thing…
Stall Owner: Anyway, thanks to the both of you! You really saved my hide!
Malleus: However… I opened one of the crates and took a look inside, it seems a few of the apples have been damaged.
Malleus: Was it due to the way I transported them? I seem to have caused you unneeded trouble.
Stall Owner: Oh, I think these bumps and bruises probably happened on the truck ride over. It's not your fault.
Stall Owner: This isn't nothing to worry about. Right, Epel?
Malleus: Is that so?
Epel: Yep! I mean, if these were going to be eaten as is, or made into whole candied apples, they wouldn't be able to be sold like this, but…
Epel: But since his stall is going to be selling pastries made from processed apples, this much damage isn't an issue.
Malleus: I see. So, damage does not necessarily constitute the disposal of these apples.
Epel: Oh, we couldn't do something so wasteful as to throw them away! Harveston's apples are way too delicious for that.
Stall Owner: That's that. And most of the apple pastries I have here are special made for this city, you know.
Epel: Oh, you're right. Looking at your menu, I don't think I've seen a many of these pastries before.
Epel: You've got a pound cake that looks like the Bell of Salvation. And… Is this a pie? It's kind of weird.
Stall Owner: The theme of the festival here in the City of Flowers is "Topsy-Turvy," right? That's why I switched up the pie crust and the filling.
Epel: So, you're saying that the apple filling is wrapped around the pie crust? Wow, I didn't know that kind of thing was possible!
Malleus: They are all so exquisite. The other apple pastries you have all look rather fascinating, as well.
Stall Owner: Oh yeah, I should do something as thanks for the two of you helping me. I'll treat the two of you to some Harveston apple pastries.
Epel: But don't you have to make your pastries for the festival?
Epel: I can make something for Malleus-san as thanks. Since he carried the whole truck over here, we got plenty of time.
Stall Owner: Sorry for everything… And thanks, I'll leave it to you. Feel free to use any of my cooking utensils or seasonings.
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Epel: It's done! It's not as fancy as the ones you'd find at this here stall, but…
Malleus: It smells wonderful… Did you bake the apples?
Epel: Yep, I baked some thinly sliced apples with a ton of butter.
Epel: Please try it with alongside the vanilla ice cream here. It'll be super delicious!
Malleus: Is that so? Then, allow me to try some.
Malleus: ...I see, this is pretty good. It has a different flavor and texture from fresh fruit.
Epel: So, actually, I made this baked apple from the damaged apples you saw earlier. Does that make you feel a bit better?
Malleus: Ah, indeed, because it was baked, I cannot tell what it looked like prior. I understand why he said there would be nothing to worry about.
Epel: Us in Harveston have always made sure to eat all our excess apples so there's no waste.
Epel: And recently, we started selling apple juice, too…
Epel: Whenever Harveston has a festival, we have a ton of stalls lined up selling a lot more of our traditional pies or other dishes with apples in them.
Epel: They're much tastier than any quick and easy thing I can whip up… It'd be nice if you could try it sometime too, Malleus-san.
Malleus: Harveston, I see. I will remember that.
Epel: …Ah! I just realized how much time has passed. I need to head back.
Malleus: I shall also return to my group. Thank you for the meal.
Epel: No, thank you so much!
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[City of Flowers]
Epel: S-Sorry to keep you waiting! Am I late…?
Azul: Not at all. It is still 30 seconds before the time we agreed on, so you're not late at all.
Epel: I can't believe you were even counting down to the seconds… I bet I'd've been in a load of trouble if I was late…!
Azul: …Oh?
Epel: …? Uhh… What's wrong?
Azul: No, nothing… I only thought I smelled the delicious fragrance of apples coming off of you.
Azul: There weren't any shops on the route we took earlier that served apples, so I'm curious, where did you have some?
Epel: Fufu, it was just a special situation that happened.
Deuce: A special situation? Why're you sounding so self-important? Oh, did you find a good shop tucked away somewhere?
Epel: A good shop…? Oh, yeah, it was a great shop! But it's almost time to meet up with everyone else, so there's not enough time to chat about it now.
Epel: I'll tell you guys just how awesome the place is later once everything settles down.
Epel: 'Sides, after everything's over… We'll still have a ton of time to enjoy this visit!
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(Part 1) Part 2
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atorionsbelt · 1 year
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some thoughts on 3x11 mom city:
i almost wish… we had gotten the chance to see jamie have a panic attack, or an overwhelmed pause regarding everything that he’s been dealing with beneath the surface over the course of the series, especially as a parallel to ted. to be taken seriously in that moment and for the audience to be put directly in his headspace; helpless debilitating fear of possibly seeing his father again. a beat of quiet where the world stops and slows down for a minute. joining in breath and stillness and the comfort its met with. roy and/or keeley being there for him, ted in the aftermath. a notable conversation about boundaries, attachment, guilt.
of course, i never want to magnify the pain of my favorite characters more than any of the circumstances they’ve already been dealt — this would’ve been a natural response many people experience after his severe level of trauma. after it’s been all piled up and up until he can’t ignore it for any longer. after the root of his ptsd has relentlessly lurked unpredictable and inescapable just out of frame, and seemingly threatens to again.
the mom city boot room scene doesn’t necessarily have to be replaced by this, if anything it played an essential part in the duality of depression and how it appears. big outbursts of emotional distress that avoid the event that upset you in the first place; a cry for help, a distraction, a release for what you’re carrying inside even though you can’t admit it’s real quite yet. then the other half. the suffering in the silence; disassociation, drowning until only the numbness remains “like it’s in my soul.”
i know it’s tough subject matter, but it would’ve been so poignant and vital to such a significant part of jamie’s characterization. then comes the topic of forgiveness.
before it was revealed jamie’s dad was in rehab, when he said it was freaking him out that he couldn’t find him in the crowd, i had almost thought ted would tell jamie that they had james sr. permanently banned from his matches after wembley. that he was finally free from him now. assuring jamie he could even get a restraining order if he wanted, evoking a wash of both relief and grief on his face.
regardless of the rehab choice, i always thought it could’ve been one of the most impactful routes to cut ties and go no contact for good just like his mom likely had done. many of us with toxic family members are given no other choice but to do so, it just felt like a golden missed opportunity for healing and cathartic solidarity.
and maybe another solid plotline could’ve been two contrasting sides of forgiveness. ted’s advice vs roy/keeley’s. they would have no hesitation telling jamie that any man alive who abuses him deserves nothing less than losing the right to having the honor of jamie as a son. jamie’s dad stopped being his dad a long time ago. ted is in the dark about how truly bad it is, and biased by his own experience of loss, it doesn’t do the scene justice standing on its own. keeley knows him most intimately, and roy may be the only one that knows about the amsterdam SA. give him options: jamie doesn’t need to forgive him right now or ever, or thank him for a lesson no one should have to learn, or feel that he owes him any help that he himself was never given. just let him go. jamie’s still in his 20s, still closer to being an impressionable kid, still holding onto a burden keeping him from total freedom and autonomy that was never his responsibility. he struggles with self worth and detaching his identity from his dad. he can always change his mind later on about how he feels, but separation and safety should be his priority in order to ever fully cope and move forward. to mourn the loss of his own youth to confusion and torment.
well aware jamie’s friends aren’t verified therapists like dr sharon, but nonetheless, for the sake of communicating a message for the end of the episode, if both jamie and ted lasso viewers were to be presented with more than one singular take on such a delicately personal situation there would be less room for misinterpretation and which behavior is actually being praised — especially under an episode umbrella theme concerning the value in being given second chances.
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Text
A3! My Worst Wedding | Izumida Azami | Mini Chats Translation
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—————
Disclaimer: Neither English nor Japanese is my native language, but I did my best with the translation. By the way, I took some liberties while translating. If you find any mistakes, feel free to tell me.
Practice Conversation 1 
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It’s been a while since I was the lead in an autumn troupe’s play. This lead role feels completely different from the one back then. 
That shitty Sakyo said I should be careful not to let the main lead get overshadowed by the second lead acting. As if I would let that happen. 
Instead, I will show a strong presence with my acting to overshadow his second lead role. 
But yeah… I can’t get how it feels to be in love with my fiance, so I have to think a lot about it in my role study. 
…Maybe I should ask Muku-san if he can lend me light shoujo manga to read for now.
Practice Conversation 2
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Ethan fell head over heels for Olivia since she looked like his favorite anime character. 
So I thought of getting references for my role study from Itaru-san since he likes anime…
When I mentioned him the setting, he said he could totally relate to it and started speaking about it so passionately. 
Like how happy he would be if she looked like his fave character, the excitement he would get to see his fiance, or how he would like to brag about her to those around him… 
However, seeing Itaru-san speaking so passionately made me think… that Ethan might have fallen in love this hard too.
Itaru-san was enthusiastic, and his eyes were shining brightly during our talk…
Practice Conversation 3
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About my role study for Ethan? Well, I’ve gotten advice from everyone and tried different things.
Muku-san showed me some manga with scenes where the characters fall in love at first sight… but I’m far away from getting that feeling. 
Then, Muku-san and Kazunari-san said… 
Since Olivia is older than Ethan, I could try to imagine Director as my fiance as part of my role study. 
You, as my… future spouse… 
I-It’s nothing. I just tried to do what they said for a bit! 
Shoot. I know this is for role study, but I kinda got conscious, and now it feels weird.
A-Anyways, I’ll think more about my role study. 
Ahm… I might need help from Director again in the future, so thanks beforehand. 
Azami and Hisoka Mini Chat
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Azami: So weddings…
Hisoka: Weddings have different production and performances. 
Azami: Ah, that’s right. If I’m not wrong, you had a part-time job in a wedding venue before, Hisoka-san. 
Hisoka: Mhm. For a short time, though. 
Azami: I’ve acted in the Wedding Fest and the Wedding Venue, but I don’t know much about weddings aside from those celebrated in the Ginsekai. 
Azami: Could you tell me about it to use it as a reference for my next play?
Hisoka: …I worked in the banquet reception. So I served the food and poured the drinks. 
Hisoka: At the wedding, there was a speech about how the groom and the bride met each other… 
Hisoka: The two of them said what they liked about each other and hugged. 
Azami: T-Their meeting, the things they like, and a hug…
Hisoka: From what I saw at the wedding, there can be singing performances and magic shows. I helped arrange the stage for them. 
Azami: Heh, I see. So it was true that Hisoka-san works properly in his part-time job. 
Hisoka: Of course.
Hisoka: Now, I’ll tell you the most important part about that.
Azami: What?
Hisoka: They had a delicious marshmallow cake in the wedding venue.
Azami: …You can do a good job and still remain the same as always, no matter where you are.
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Notes: The events Azami mentioned appears in Bride Concerto (ch. 10) and Groom Battle Royale AGAIN (ch. 9). Azami’s SR Wish Upon A Paper Crane has one of the Ginsekai customs for weddings. Hisoka’s part-time job in a wedding venue comes from his SSR Tempting Wedding Cake backstage.
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heartlandians · 6 months
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What’s been going on with Lisa lately this season? I know about Dan, but I haven’t watched anymore since.
Episode 2 - Jack mentions having a phone call with Lisa to Tim and bragging to her how he drove a carriage while training a pair of carriage racing horses with Amy. It's not explained where Lisa is.
Episode 4 - Lisa cosponsors a teen community dance and becomes part of the committee. She receives a two-stepping class as a gift from one of the cosponsors and wants Jack to join her. Jack does it, but does not enjoy the experience, which makes Lisa frustrated about how he's reluclant about doing things that might be a bit uncomfortable for him but would mean the world for her, so they had a bit of an argument about it. Lisa says she'll go to the dance alone because she rather have fun than watch Jack complain and mope the whole time. Later, when Lisa goes to the teen community dance with Katie, Jack makes a surprise appearance and asks her to dance with him. Lisa accepts his apology and his invitation to dance. They make up.
Episode 5 - Lisa finds about Dan's death from Val Stanton few days after his passing and keeps the information to herself while Jack is training Blue for an upcoming event. She then mentions about it casually to Jack after dinner, which shocks him, and he expects her to feel sad about the news. Lisa's anger about the passing and how she found out on top of her refusal to grieve confuses Jack, so he makes attempts to talk about it. He even says he'll drop out from the event so he can attend the funeral with her. Lisa tells him to go, as he's been training so hard and been so excited about the whole thing, and shares that she won't go to the funeral, anyway, so that's that. When Jack keeps pressing the matter, Lisa finally confesses that she feels like she can't really talk about Dan and her life with Dan to Jack because they never got along. Finally, there's a break-through after Jack says he's okay with Lisa saying whatever she wants to say and he suspects that she didn't just have bad times with Dan and it's only natural for her to grieve the loss of her ex-husband. Eventually Lisa breaks down in tears as she recalls some of their good times together and accepts Jack's offer to join her to the funeral.
Just before his death, Dan has mailed a framed newspaper clipping to Lisa about their first winning horse together, which now arrives in mail, and she feels like it was his way of saying goodbye to her and thanking for the good times. Episode 6 - Lisa writes a speech to Dan's funeral as per his sister's request. It makes her think how adventurous Dan was, even if sometimes drove her crazy. While writing, she voices to Jack that she wishes they too would have that kind of care-free attitude, because they've become somewhat stagnant, mostly focusing on their businesses and supporting the family. Jack says his life with Lisa is an adventure itself, but Lisa doesn't feel like "it's enough".
Later on in the episode, she and Jack attend the funeral which has made her think even more about the time they have left together. She then asks Jack if he thinks they're living their best life. Jack says his life has become better ever since Lisa came into it, and Lisa replies by saying: "That doesn't really answer my question".
When Jack opens the truck door for her and says they have leftovers to eat at home, Lisa suggests they'd do something unexpected instead, since they're all dressed up, like go to a pub to eat. She challenges Jack to "live a little". Eventually Jack agrees.
They then go to a pub to have a dinner. While eating, a familiar song comes on, and Lisa suggests they should dance. Jack is confused at first because they're in the middle of a dinner, but finally agrees as it seems to make Lisa happy. They go to the dance floor to two-step and while dancing, Jack spots his old belt buckle that he had to sell when he and Lyndy (Sr.) were having money problems back in the day.
Hoping to get it back now that Jack has money, Jack and Lisa have a talk with the owner of the pub, hoping he'd sell it back, but the man refuses. Lisa then challenges the guy to wager; if the guy wins a round of pool, they'll pay him 500 dollars, but if Jack wins, he gets the buckle. Jack doesn't like the idea, but Lisa pushes it.
Eventually Jack plays against the owner and loses. The owner is smug about his win, but Lisa says she wants to try to play against the winner, and the guy accepts, thinking he'll just get more money from them.
Turns out, Lisa is actually really good at pool because she and Dan used to play it a lot. She wins the round, and they get to take the belt buckle with them. Jack finds it funny that Dan played some part in winning back that buckle, after everything they went through.
As they get home, Lisa is happy that they got to "live a little".
Episode 7 - Jack says he has "a phone date with his wife" when a Dude Ranch guest tries to invite him over for a wine. It's not explained where Lisa is.
That's it, so far. The latest episode that aired was number 7. She's going to be in episode 8 (airing this Sunday) and I suspect in episodes 9 and 10 as well.
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the-himawari · 10 months
Text
A3! Sakisaka Muku - Translation [SR] Gentleman Who Protects His Clan (1/2)
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*Please read disclaimer on blog; default name set as Izumi
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*knock, knock*
Muku: Director-san, do you have a minute right now? I have a favour to ask you…
Izumi: Sure, no problem.
-pause-
Izumi: You have a favour, you say?
Muku: So you see… if you don’t have any plans on the weekend, I’d like you to go on a date with me for a day!
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Izumi: Eh!? What brought this up all of a sudden?
Muku: As you know, Hotarumiya who I’m playing in the upcoming firefly festival is established as someone who really cares about women.
Izumi: Ah, that’s right. He’s a character who lives his life while protecting women.
Muku: Yes. And so, I thought that if I could escort you for a day as a way to prepare for my role who cherishes women, I might feel a little closer my character…
Izumi: Fufu. I see. If that’s the case, then I’ll help you out. I’ll leave my weekend free.
Muku: Thank you so much!
Izumi: I’m looking forward to this unexpected plan. Where should we go though?
Muku: Actually, I came up with a plan… But of course anywhere you'd like to go takes priority. Please don’t hesitate to tell me if you have any place in mind!
Izumi: In that case, I’ll leave everything to you and look forward to your plan.
Muku: Got it. Please leave it to me!
-pause-
Izumi: (Muku-kun told me to meet up with him in front of the station. We could’ve left from the dorm together though…)
Muku: Sorry for the wait.
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Izumi: Muku-kun…!? That outfit…
Muku: How does it look…?
Option 1: “I was surprised”
Izumi: I was a little surprised, but you look really cool!
Muku: Do you mean it! If you say so, then I’m glad I kept it a surprise.
Izumi: So that’s why you decided to meet up instead of leaving from the dorm together.
Muku: Exactly! …Plus I thought it might be nice and feel more like a date if we met up.
Izumi: !
Muku: Director-san?
Izumi: Ah, no! It’s nothing. (I swear my heart skipped a beat… Muku-kun is preparing for his role today, so I have to help as much as I can!)
Option 2: “You look nice”
Izumi: You look really nice!
Muku: Ehehe. Thank you so much. I’m really happy! Seeing as I’m going to escort you, I wanted to go out looking a little more mature.
Izumi: Maybe it would’ve been better if I dressed up a little more stylishly too…
Muku: That’s not true! You look really beautiful today as always, Director-san.
Izumi: (Muku-kun’s a natural prince at things like this…!)
Muku: The truth is, I told Kazu-kun that I was going to be escorting you today… And then he helped me coordinate my outfit.
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Izumi: I see. Fufu. That’s nice of Kazunari-kun to lend you a hand with your role study.
Muku: Agreed! Alright then, let’s head to the first place in the date plan I came up with!
-pause-
Izumi: This is…
Muku: Do you remember in the past when we participated in a collaboration show with penguins?*
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Izumi: Of course I remember. I felt so happy when Ikura the penguin was able to pull off his dive.
Muku: Fufu. Well this is that aquarium. When I thought that an aquarium date was a classic, this is the first place that came to mind. And if possible, I wanted to see Ikura as well…
Izumi: Ah, it says in this pamphlet that there’s an event where you can pet the penguins. Maybe we’ll be able to see Ikura there.
Muku: You’re right. It’s at an outdoor booth. Let’s go there when the time comes!
Izumi: Sounds good to me. Let’s start off by following the suggested route and take a look at all the fish tanks inside.
-pause-
Guest A: How cute~!
Guest B: It’s so fluffy!
Muku: There’s a huge crowd over there! I wonder what’s happening?
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Izumi: It says there’s a baby seal! But it looks really popular, so let’s wait until it calms down a bit…
Muku: …Come here, Director-san.
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Izumi: Hm? (Woah, he pulled me by the hand to stand in front of him…)
Muku: Sorry it’s a little cramped. But there was a spot where you could get a good look.
Izumi: It’s fine! Thank you.
Muku: Fufu. You’re welcome.
-pause-
Hall announcement: It’s almost time for the penguin petting session. Everyone, please make your way outside…
Children: YAY, LET’S GO!
Muku: We better get moving too!
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Izumi: Lead the way!
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*References the Aquarium ShowTime event story
| next
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insu-be · 7 months
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·͙⠀⠀hi there ! i'm em { she/her | +21 } and i'm excited to finally be back here at wannabe ( for like the 4th or 5th time?? idr ). i bring to you a new muse that i've been wanting to have for a little while now that has been super loud in my head for at least the past 3-4 months. kang insu. he's my sr media wannabe who comes from a wealthy family ( his father isn't very approving of his 'dream' and refuses to really acknowledge any of it while saying that insu will only bring shame to the family if he continues being 'stubborn' ). he's currently in a band which is a secret from his father ( basically insu has made it seem as if he gave up on his dream of being an idol, planning to really hit his father with the news if he ever debuts, sort of like an 'in your face' moment of sorts ).
i know this is late for an introduction, i usually have one up within an hour of being accepted, but i've been tired from work the past few days and decided to hold off until i was really ready to get things rolling. c: below i'll be listing a few 'fun facts' about insu ( some of which can even be connections/plot ideas and will be labeled as so ). so, if you'd like to plot and get something going for insu and your muse, feel free to like this post and i'll slide into your dm's ! ( also, i apologize for having it set to where he can only receive dm's from those he's following, i forgot to turn that off but it's open now )
insu can come off as the 'i can't stand you' or the 'i don't wanna be here right now' type of person, though really he just has resting bitch face ( only because he lacks the 'fatherly love' and was forced to keep up 'appearances' due to his family background ). very deep down he just wants to be acknowledged and told he's doing a good job... just don't pat his head or anything of the sort because he'll glare ( if looks could kill..... )
when it comes to his mother, she the more supportive out of the family due to having once been a famous pianist. she retired from the industry though after having insu so that she could focus on being a mother and taking care of the family. you could say this is sort of where insu gets his love for music from.
when insu is around his closest friends, he still has that same 'resting bitch face' but he will crack a smile ( and even laugh ) at times when he feels like it. though, only one person has ever really known why he's like this and that's only because they've been best friends since they were little. ( cue childhood friends plot here ! )
from the moment that he joined the band that he's currently in, he's managed to keep his identity hidden with a black facemask and caps/hats ( kinda like how superman can 'hide his identity' with just a pair of glasses? ). this makes it even easier for him to hide this from his father for a few reasons: firstly because his father doesn't listen to music. secondly because he plays the guitar so no one has ever heard his voice besides his own bandmates.
his daily style is a bit more laid back and casual compared to when he's either performing with the band or having to attend the occasional events that his father forces him to attend. gotta keep up with the 'loving' father-son appearance. right?
he's only really ever had a couple ex's which most likely ended due to his 'lack of affection' or lack of being able to really show how he's feeling ( thanks a lot 'dad' ) so he doesn't really bother with beating around the bush now when it comes to rejecting anyone who approaches him. ( open for both ex's and any crushes on him ! )
insu did have a childhood crush long ago when he was a lot younger ( think elementary school/first 'love' type of thing ) but it was probably one-sided and never known to the other person ( another open plot idea to work with ! c: )
he not only wants to be an idol to show his dad that he can do what he loves and can make it on his own. he honestly wants to make music, sing/dance, and just be in the spotlight while receiving love from fans for what he does. it's not just some silly dream for him, it's his passion and he's more than determined to make this his future career if ever given the chance to do so. ( me being the mun that i am, i hope he fails a few times just to torture him a bit hehehe )
other than all of that, or rather those basic facts, insu is pretty much an 'open book' that i'm ready to develop over time and have him go through the ups and downs of going after his dream. this means that i'm open to any and all types of plots/connections whether they're cute ( or at least as 'cute' as they can possibly be with this rbf boy ), angsty, etc. so feel free to hit me up any time because i'm down for getting him out there and even having him ( eventually ) open up more. if you can get him to smile/laugh more? well, that would be greatly appreciated !
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the-weirdos-mind · 1 month
Text
Maraposas & Milagros
Summary:
In the Land of Miracles there’s a special ceremony taken place to honor the woman who founded their homeland and her family by lighting butterfly shaped candles and setting them free into the night sky. The time leading up to the event is a big community party in the town’s center.
Cards: Regalo Ruana
This limited time card selection is inspired by traditional Colombian clothing. Each card gets a ruana with either a dress or shirt and pants. Everyone in the card holds their butterfly candle
SSR: Oscar, Maya, Renata, Estella, Isabelle, Freya, and Lilia
SR: Minako, Ophelia, Riddle, Jade, Drew, Juno, Marian, and Darling
R: Marrin, Jack, Phillipa, Lily, and Ayumu
Tags: @adrianasunderworld @mangacupcake @writing-heiress @marrondrawsalot @anxious-twisted-vampire @abyssthing198 @achy-boo
Concept:
It all starts when Oscar gets a call from one of his sisters reminding him of the festival that’s happening tomorrow. He promised his sisters that he would bring a few friends since they worry about him at NRC. After hanging up he goes to Ramshackle to invite the Prefects. Estella finds him at the door and lets him in. He sees the Prefects sitting down in the lounge and asks them, and Grim, if they would like to visit his home. He goes into further details about the festival, Oruguita Liberta, in which everyone in his town honors the founding woman and her family by lighting candles that turn into butterflies and flutter around in the air. He then asks if they’re willing to go, to which they say yes. He thanks them and goes on to invite Marrin, Riddle, Jade, Jack, and Lilia.
The next day they arrived at the Mirror Chamber and are taken to the Land of Miracles. The town square, Famila Center, is decorated with many butterfly themed decorations and vendors selling their goods. They meet Maya and Reneta, with their friends. After greetings were exchanged the triplets take them to their house so they can put their bags down and get changed into their attire. Grim even gets a bow that’s decorated with butterflies. After they get changed they meet their mom, Alana Maldición. She welcomes her children home and their friends. She tells them they’re free to explore the square for the day but reminds them to be back before sundown. Before they depart, she serves some snacks for her guests as hospitality is very important in the home.
Lily asks why they need to meet back and Reneta explains that they’ll be getting their candles for later. They depart from the house and head back to the square. The triplets take them to a group of statues with a fountain surrounding them. They tell them it’s the Gifted Family, the family who first settled in the area. One by one the triplets go through the family:
The Founder (Alma Madrigal)
The Healing Cook (Julieta Madrigal)
The Concerning Father (Agustin Madrigal)
The Botanical Keeper (Isabela Madrigal)
The Pressure Reliever (Luisa Madrigal)
The Magicless Savior (Maribel Madrigal)
The Tamer of the Weather (Pepa Madrigal)
The Energetic Father (Félix Madrigal)
The Hearer of Secrets (Dolores Madrigal)
The Master of Shifting (Camilo Madrigal)
The Father of Beastaming (Antino Madrigal)
The Seer of the Future (Bruno Madrigal)
As they talk about the family, Oscar mentions that there isn’t much about the Seer of the Future as at one point, people didn’t talk about him for some reason. When asked why, they said that they didn’t know why. After the history lesson, they head to a vendor and try the variety of arepas, a staple food in their home. It’s said that recipe was crafted by the Healing Cook but only her cooking had the power to heal whoever ate it. After she died, the dish was passed down to honor her. Oscar gets a few of them for himself as they’re his favorite food. They also get coffee to drink.
Minako notices the kids drinking the coffee and asks if it’s normal. Maya confirms that it is, but it’s best not to give them too much. After eating they go exploring around the other stands. Grim comes across a puzzle where by connecting the pieces it’ll reveal a secret picture. He gives it a go and the picture is of the Botanical Keeper and Magicless Savior hugging. As they continue roaming around, they find souvenirs for their friends back at school. Riddle is intrigued by the many toys that were based on animals that were with the Father of Beastaming. Lilia is fond of a cloak that can temporarily change your looks to whoever pops into mind. Jack likes the weights with donkeys on them. Jade is fond of the many mushrooms in their terrariums, some said to have been crafted by the Botanical Keeper. Estella likes the butterfly handkerchief she found, and a plush donkey. They also try more local food like coco rice and patacones.
Then they come across a little stage where a variety of creatures very performing shows. Anyone can enter if they wish and Oscar decides to enter and use the rats to put on a telenovela. While he plots out the story the rest of the group goes and captures rats (Twistune here) Once the rats were gathered he rehearses the plot and the show is on. The group were confused by the plot but everyone else loves it. Once sundown hits they all head to the triplets home and get their candles. She also hands them a match saying that turns the candle’s shape into a butterfly.
Alana leads the group to the edge of a river, one that’s incredibly beautiful. They all wade into the shallows and watch the sun fall. Once the moonlight is shining every strikes their match and lights their candles. After a few moments of waiting, and complaining from Grim, they all watch in awe as the candle glows from the inside and transforms into a butterfly. The butterflies take off flying in a circle around everyone in town. As they stand there and watch for a moment they start to hear music. Alana says that part of the tradition is to dance underneath the lights and that’s what they all do. (Twistune here)
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Hi, I just want to thank you for rekindling my love LZYI, now I hope this question is not weird, but what's your least favorite Victor date?
haha, welcome back to the vortex~ *⁠´⁠︶⁠`⁠*~💕
uhh, no definitely not a weird question but certainly a very tough one LOL. especially given that Li Zeyan’s got an extraordinary writing team, and they hardly ever drop the ball even in the circumstances when all the writing teams are given very limited space/ strict event criterias.
and the most significant point of all, as I mentioned in my previous answer, the journey/ relationship with Victor is a very chronological process.
it’s not always, oh yeah, yesterday they did a shoot, today they went to the park, tomorrow they’ll stay home and do this. most of his date stories aren’t just date stories for the sake of being one— there’s a progressing storyline going on here, e.g., currently, we’re following the thread after Victor’s 5th birthday— pursuing the new contract between LFG and MC’s company, and their goal to integrate the other person in every aspect of their lives (which was followed by the dual proposal and living together). we were also given a one-year summary of the contract on his 6th birthday after the follow-up dates.
plus, it’s been so long, and the writers are so good at weaving the thread together that when you look back– on the surface, while the initial “bite-sized” dates may seem to not “hold up” against the dates released later on, you cannot discard them as not important/ significant since they were the very stones we stepped on to reach today’s relationship status LOL 😂 so, for someone like me who is a reader who consumes EVERYTHING before forming a concrete verdict, it is a very tough question 🤣🫠
anyway, so I had to do a deep dive and go through my archives. If I had to choose one, it would probably be “记录之约” (Recording Date on EN). it was not so much that I didn’t find the story enjoyable, which I did, but it was one of those filler events, you know? and tbh, I don’t expect the stories for these cards to be something spectacular. So, while it was an adorable date with plenty of sweet moments + Victor tells you how much he yearns for the “world-of-two-people” and “three-meals-a-day-together” life with you, overall it felt like a slow/ almost lazy writing, and there wasn’t much to write home about given the relationship progress at the time. :> I probably would’ve put “牧场之约” (Ranch Date - free SR) in that category too, but the important crumbs the writers dropped about his mom and tied it with his attachment to that place for later call-backs saved it for me~ ಡ⁠ ͜⁠ ಡ💕
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twstgameplay · 11 months
Note
Hi Mods! I really wanna try getting an SSS on the regular Omni basic exam. My highest score ever for this exam was 19.7k, which was from the exam back in Oct. 2022... orz
Most of my SSRs are lvl 80 except the following: Gala Ortho (under-leveled), Beans Floyd (lvl 96), Dorm Floyd (lvl 85), Halloween Jade (lvl 87), Dorm Azul (lvl 86), Tsum Riddle (under-leveled), and Dorm Riddle (lvl 85).
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I have all the standard SRs and free event SRs/Rs (SRs = at least lvl 30, Rs = at least lvl 20, spell lvls = 1/1)
I also have a couple of banner SRs including: Chef Riddle, Gala Ace, Tsum Cater, Chef Trey, Halloween Leona, Beans Jack, Halloween Azul, Chef Jade, Tsum Floyd, Chef Jamil, and Beans Rook.
My usual team for this exam is: Dorm Riddle, Dorm Azul, Dorm Leona, Dorm Vil, and Beans Floyd/Halloween Jade. Are there any better suggestions? I do have the available resources to limit break SSRs/SRs and level up any cards & their spells. Many thanks! <33
Your team is pretty good especially since some of them have been LB and there are 5 duos and the elements are pretty balanced. If you want to LB a character to try for SSS, I recommend an ATK card like Dorm Riddle, Dorm Leona, or GM Ace. Personally, I would stick with your current team until I get the perfect run.
However, if you LB cards your team might not work because you run into the issue of doing too much DMG. So here are some other options for you to consider.
Dorm Riddle
Dorm Azul
GM Ace
Dorm Trey
Cater
This team has 4 duos and Riddle duo is your finisher. Cater is there as Riddle's ATK buddy and for Trey's duo. So pick which Cater that will help you bring the HP down enough for a large overkill.
Dorm Riddle
Dorm Azul
Dorm Leona
Dorm Vil
GM Ace
GM Ace will also get you 5 duos and he is strong as a finisher. His M1 at lvl 10 will get you 2 strong hits like Dorm Leona and Dorm Riddle. I will warn you that this team might be too strong unless you intentionally go for neutral or weak hits.
~ 👑
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phoebosacerales · 2 years
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Hi, I don't know if this is a question with an obvious answer, but is there a way in astrology to look at specific past things and determinate 100% if that was inevitable, or not, if that course of events were meant to happen exactly as it did? and how to do that? I know this question falls in line with the fate VS. free will discourse you have talked about before, and no one will be able to have a definite answer. (info dump and context lol) I think about it bc of an specific moment or phase (made out of my own choices) that impacted and changed me and my life in many ways (I can't say it was entirely for the better or so I perceive it. I do try hard to see the positive, but the truth is I do beat myself over it sometimes, and it's what lead me to astrology to understand things) so I always wonder about it.
fate/free will is one of the things that intrigues me the most.
I know it's kind of tricky too, because the answer is probably closely linked to our charts (and whatever impact things has its also related to our own perceptions). I'm not an astrologer, so with my limited knowledge, when I look at SR's and house profections of that time I recognize themes relating to it and transits activating planets. But are there ways to confirm? ways to see if things could be avoided? cause I've even heard from people you can prevent stuff if you are aware and even change the outcomes, but is that even a possibility sometimes?
sorry for the long ask, omg. summarizing: are there ways to know 100% if some events and outcomes in your life were unavoidable or vice versa ?
sorry again, and thank you!
That's the hardest question ever. I really don't have the mental capacity to try and discuss this right now, but first impression I think it seems like you're trying a bit too hard to see the positive while destiny isn't really bad or good, at least in the way I understand.
It's also important to understand that the sky isn't doing this to you, astrology is not a god, and I don't think that prediction necessarily means that everything is predetermined. I think it just means that everything has a level of predictability because you were born in a certain time, place, context. But if everything even in its details is predetermined is another deeper discussion. I've been interested in understanding the way destiny is for syncretic brazilian religions like umbanda (don't trust wikipedia about this) for example, and I think I like the way they see it. Prediction is not something set in stone for many of them, because things can change if you're aware of the patterns. But we don't know the answers to these questions, we don't know why things happen in the way that they do; and the people who think they have an answer, easily fall into paradoxes or contraditory argumentations. I think this discussion between Austin Coppock and Chris Brennan is a good example of that and I think it will help you think about this more deeply, since I'm incapable right now lol. I'm more on Austin's side with this. Chris has this stoicism which I really dislike, because he sees the issue in telling people that they can change things if they have the right mindset, generating guilt in the person for their circumstances when they can't, but he seems to have no awareness of how problematic it also is to say to them that there's nothing that they can do but accept fate. He has a problem with the idea that people can change their fate if they're the right kind of willed person, but he doesn't have a problem with the idea that people can change their mindset and accept their fate if they're the right kind of stoic person. Both ideas are exclusivist. How am I going to tell someone who suffers injustice, oppression and poverty that they need to accept their fate? He doesn't see how stoicism was also a political stance that served to put people in their places. This is one step away from all kinds of classist and racist ideas.
Of course I don't think there's no such thing as destiny/fate. I wonder about this and change my mind a little bit on the subject all the time.
I like Albert Camus, though, and revolting against the Absurd.
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seelestia · 1 year
Note
OH NO WHY IS IT ACTUALLY WORKING.. (where’s kazuha i wanna give him a lil smooch 😽 /hj)
omg thank you!! i worked super hard on it and i just love how it turned out (i am not changing it anytime soon, if i do - you’re free to call me out for it 🏃‍♀️💨 /lh) HONKAI STAR RAIL WAITING PARTY LEZZGO 🧚💕
hm, no not really.. but out of topic, yanqing looks so squishable <3 and he’s being voiced by amber may?? SHEESH.
omg yay!! super proud of you for getting through it all <3 i have to suffer next tuesday, not prepared in the slightest because of my recent trip to the doctor - got diagnosed with anxiety disorder and i’m being sent to a psychologist soon 😞 though, i am getting academic help starting may 1st - my grades aren’t the best rn /srs. wanderer my skrunkly pookie honeybun sugarplum lovie dovie baby love 🥺🥺🥺
tighnari <333 i mean what,, but yes he found me 🥰 (now let me touch.. the.. ears.. hehe. /hj)
lia enabler era, i shall continue to alert my friends every second of the day - to show my love and appreciation for our dearest genshin men 😇
i still remember your kazuha phase from when we first became moots... BRING IT BACK!! (/lh) and the roblox memes too!! here, i got some for you 🤭
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and suddenly, i'm reminded of winnie. hehe, i hope winnie is doing well <3
HSR FINALLY GOT RELEASED WOOO WEEEE 🎉 i've been playing it daily these days but i'm still at lvl 20. i got bronya as my first 5-star btw (sometimes, my jaw drops when i realize she boosts ATK and Crit DMG like are you fr /j), i hope you get the 5-star you want!! or yanqing because he looks cool and we should be friends with him <3
best of luck!! :( we're not made to be good at multitasking at the same times especially when it comes to serious things like mental health or grades. and of course, we should prioritize your mental health first because i believe that is the foundation of how you go about your life. so don't ever feel guilty abt prioritizing your health first. for now, heal and pick up where you left off when you're ready <3 chin up, yona!! 🫂
btw, speaking of tighnari, i hope you'll have some time to play genshin because the new event is SO FUN. like almost everyone is there, so i'm having fun watching the interactions and following them (wanderer specifically ofc /j) around, hehe. i think you'll love it!! <3
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coco-goat-milk · 3 years
Note
That was amazing :0 I'm requesting out of curiosity? Perhaps, Scaramouche, Xiao And Diluc with a Nezuko kamado!S/o?
Nezuko! reader x Scaramouche, Xiao and Diluc
Pronounce: She/him/they, no pronounce mentioned so i won't either!
Warning: Slight spoilers for Nezuko, Xiao and Diluc, violence (a little bit noting concerning)
A/n: Moshi moshi~ sweetie, thank you so much for the compliment! it means a lot to me <3 And yes a very interesting request, the touch-starved tsunderes. Kinda sad not many people ask for the genshin females >:(
Please check my rules!! You can find the rules/request page in my masterlist that is pinned on my blog >:)
Scaramouche
First time meeting:
Meeting him well was quite..eventful...the fandango man isn't very nice as we all know but what made him not yell at you? Maybe your calming presence? We don't know.
As you were just calmly sleeping near the training area for the harbingers, he stomped over to you.
He woke you up and got ready to yell at you, but you just calmly patted his head with a smile.
Scaramouche.exe. has stopped working
He exploded in red and then yelled at you to stop doing that, but you just kept coming back to him to do that.
He liked it.
When you two get together:
Ah yes, our aggressive fandango man has acquired an s/o.
Everyone questioned why such a sweet and cute person like you got together with you. Because he is hot asf.
You usually initiate affection, and he aggressively accepts it with a red face.
Since he has a busy job he doesn't really have time to go on dates but when he has breaks or time to spend with you he brings little gifts.
He does think you are lazy and usually reprimands you for that, you just growl at him and go back to sleep.
He is very bad at comforting you when you tell him about the people you lost, but at least he will try and be more gentle with you.
His anger slightly dims when you enter the room;
Scaramouche glared at the fatui agent in front of him, anger swirling in his eyes, the fatui agent trembled under the small man's gaze. Opening his mouth to yell at the poor guy, the door to the room opened and a person entered. The anger in Scaramouche’s eyes decreased and a smile appeared, the fatui agent fainted on the spot out of fear.
When he finds out that you are protective over him he will be very smug about it.
The little brat will tease you about it.
But he will be even more smug (and a little scared) when he sees you fighting someone for him.
will boast about you and how you are defending him.
Will bark at people who even look at you wrong /srs
He does have a soft spot for you, but he acts all tsundere.
A cute relationship and he secretly is a big simp for you (but don't tell him I said that) and he tries his best to be less aggressive to you, you don't mind though you give him affection and then go to sleep lmao.
Xiao
First time meeting:
He was sitting on top of Wangshu inn when he heard someone approaching him. He wanted to teleport away but the person's scent was what he found quite different from other Mortals.
When you came into view he was kind of shook like who are you, and what are you doing here??
You just calmly walked towards him, and he really just tensed up like a cat.
When you were in front of him, he knew you were very cute but ma’am, sir, person what are you doing?
He was even more surprised when you cupped his cheeks (the ones on ur face perv!) and just gently smiled at him.
That moment he felt as if all the voices were just in the back of his mind and the pain in his body subdued, he declared you an angel on the spot.
Ngl he was about to cry on the spot
You often came back and he just basked in your comfort each time.
When you two get together:
It would be quite difficult since he is after all the conquer of demons.
Yes he has conquered your demon heart...okay i'll stop
He is quite surprised when he finds out about what you are, but..you seem quite laid back so he lets it be.
You both have lost many things and loved ones, although you take more care of him, comforting when needed and such.
He feels angry that you put him above you, like stop what are you doing?? He doesn't want you to see him as weak and wants you to take care of him.
But it doesn't matter because you want him to be happy and feel good.
PDA isn't something Xiao is very fond of but he does like it when you two are alone and you just hold his hand with the sweetest smile, he is stunned each time with your kindness.
You two don't go on dates often but you two just sit together or hug, you also love to make flower crowns and give them to him.
He doesn't like it but for you..yes only for you he will put it on.
You also like to take naps next with him, he doesn't actually sleep he just watches you with the fondest look in his eyes.
He also gives you adepti amulets.
You are very protective over him, when in battle you will protect him, (even though he doesn't need it)
Like he will be shocked, his heart just stopped, his organs failed him, his eyes popped out of his socket, jaw flew to the floor, brain dead on the spot, bones turned to mush-. All in all he is shocked when you basically socked the demon out of existence, and you looked very...um...scary.
You growled and when you turn to him, he thinks for a hot second if you are going to obliterate him from existence as well, but then your eyes meet and he can see how your whole expression changed from an angry one into a happy one.
Y/n: 😡 👹 🤼‍♂️ 🔪 --sees Xiao---> 🤗 🥺 🧎‍♂️ 💍 💓
Xiao: 🧍 The demon: 💀
He is very shocked at your display of strength, but nevertheless pleased that you know how to protect yourself.
The relationship is quite cute and heartwarming since our poor touch-starved bby Xiao needs love and affection<3
Diluc
First time meeting:
It was at night when he was doing his Batman dark knight hero business when he saw a person being ambushed by some hillichurls.
Heading over there to vanquish the hillichurls, the person turned around angrily and with brute strength alone slayed the hillichurl.
To say he was shocked was an understatement, he stands there looking at them shocked when they turn to him.
He cocks his head to the side with the person mimicking him, asking if they were alright.
The person walked towards them and he noticeably tensed up, you however walked towards him and when you stopped in front of him he looked at you in confusion and suspicion.
Taking his hand in yours you gently caressed it, he found this weird comfort in you while you were a complete stranger.
When you two get together:
A lot of heartwarming and comforting moments.
You both have lost a lot of people you loved. While he isn't the best at comforting but his presence is very comforting to you.
While you give him a lot of comfort with your affection, he is a touch starved individual so be careful with him.
He is quite an uptight person while you are the opposite, sometimes it irritates him that you are so lazy/laid back but it also gives him some sort of relaxation.
When he goes to work at the winery you usually take a nap at one of the tables in the back or you just wander over towards the bar and lay there underneath.
He once almost accidentally stepped on you.
He loves it when he comes home and can cuddle up with you and just relax.
Loves taking you on walks when he is free.
You will growl at Kaeya each time he teases Diluc, Diluc has a very smug smirk plastered on his face.
He likes to bring little gifts from time to time.
One time he brought you a bouquet of flowers and you didn't know what to do so just ate them.
He really went 😀
He doesn't really like PDA but does like it behind closed doors.
He already knows of your strength but it still impresses him each time.
You let him rant to you about the knights.
You growl at Donna each time she ‘moans’ about Master Diluc.
He doesn't like it when you dont take care of yourself, he will take care of you <3
Overall a cute and heartwarming relationship with lots of cute moments.
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vynegar · 3 years
Text
marius electrifying night SR - excerpt
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✴.·´¯`·.·★  𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓹𝔂 𝓶𝓪𝓻𝓲𝓾𝓼 𝓶𝓸𝓷𝓭𝓪𝔂  ★·.·`¯´·.✴
There’s a particularly painful interesting story from his past that Marius tells us in this card, so I decided to translate the portions of the card story that have to do with it. Spoilers for this subplot of the card, and mild spoilers for the main card story.
disclaimer: this is a fan translation and i am not fluent in chinese, so there may be mistakes. feel free to let me know if you have questions, concerns, or comments.
do not repost without explicit permission. if you want to quote this or reference small parts of the translation, credit and link back to me.
card video here (not mine; please support the uploader by liking/commenting/subscribing)
7:07-8:25
MC: I want to hear a story about “Marius von Hagen and friends.”
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Marius: So one about my childhood... I’ve got one.
To tell you the truth, I had pretty terrible luck as a kid, too. I’d spill paint on myself when opening cans of it, I’d lose my keys outside, I’d play solo video games against people only to have a power outage... Of course, the one that left the deepest impression on me is still something that happened when I was twelve.
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Marius: At the time I had just started middle school, and I was surrounded by people who were trying to get close to me for all sorts of motives. On the surface they treated me warmly, but behind my back they each had their own schemes.
I felt like I didn’t have any friends at all who had similar goals and interests as me, until I later met Ah-fang. [T/N: Fang (放) would be his name; Ah (阿, “a”) makes it a nickname (like “-chan” in Japanese) ]
MC: Ah-fang?
Marius: Yeah, that’s his childhood nickname. Ah-fang and I had both learned painting since we were little. He was more much naturally talented at it than I was, it was just that his family was struggling financially.
Back then, the teachers would often have him help write the reports on the blackboard. There was one year for the school’s anniversary where the teachers asked him to graffiti on the bulletin boards, to publicize events. That was the first time I had encountered graffiti. I thought it was strange, so I asked him if he could teach me.
MC: Did he agree?
Marius: Yeah, but before he was able to, he...
Marius’s voice gradually grew softer, carrying a hint of regret and self-blame. For some reason, my heart began to feel troubled along with him.
MC: Did something happen afterwards?
Intuition told me that I shouldn’t continue asking him. But when I thought about it again, he had always been accustomed to bearing all his burdens alone. I thought that this would be a good opportunity to let him pour out what he’s stifled in his chest.
Marius: After that, Ah-fang...
Knock knock knock,... The sound of knocking at the door interrupted Marius’s words.
40:55 - 42:16
[context: In this card story, Anda is a young artist who teaches Marius graffiti art, and who Marius and MC help out. Marius just finished reading a thank-you note written to him by Anda, which also contains words of encouragement from the “teacher” to the “student”.]
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Marius: Do you still remember the story I told you yesterday?
MC: About Ah-fang?
Marius nodded.
Marius: Yeah, that year, Ah-fang... he agreed to my request. We arranged to meet at the bulletin boards on Friday after classes so he could teach me to graffiti. Unfortunately that day I had things that delayed me, so I got there too late.
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Marius: When I got there, I found that Ah-fang’s graffiti wall had been made a mess of with spray paint. On the ground there were overturned cans of spray paint  and several bloodstains.
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MC: Bloodstains?
Marius: Yeah. Because I didn’t spare a glance at those people who were trying to use me, but I was so close with Ah-fang, so they thought that Ah-fang was getting in their way. They found some idle people and cruelly retaliated against Ah-fang, injuring his hand.
MC: Oh god... Then later, was Ah-fang...?
Marius: Originally I wanted to visit him, but I was told that his parents convinced him transfer schools. Afterwards I never saw him again.
MC: This wasn’t your fault.
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Marius: But it happened because of me.
With a lonely expression, he picked up his glass and drank.
Marius: It's okay. This time I wasn't late. [...]
MC: Well what about you?
Marius was stunned for a moment, not responding. He was always like this, he was used to thinking about others, but never thinking about himself.
MC: Have you ever thought that Ah-fang choosing to transfer schools could be because he didn't want to make things difficult for you?
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Marius: ...
MC: You were one of his few friends in school, he must have been like Anda...
I paused slightly, took the fruit beer from his hand, and poured myself a glass. With my voice slightly tipsy, I spoke so that both he and I could hear.
MC: Like Anda, he hopes that Marius von Hagen's future has love and dreams.
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(MC continues to give heartfelt toast to Marius’s freedom and happiness in the future. Cheers!)
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