#stories like this always get me in the feels
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hm ok so interestingly, bdubs’s courthouse is built on an odd number of blocks. note the roof of the facade coming to a point, but more importantly, the nine pillars….
you don’t use an odd number of pillars. like ever.
let me get this out of the way first: i get why you’d build with odd numbers in minecraft. i usually do it myself, to not run into problems like double doors or two-wide pointed roofs or frustrating spacing/symmetry between decorative elements. however. to not even out the design of something so unequivocally done in every other example of columns and pillars…. fascinating implications…
every other example guys. every other building with columns like this has an even number of them.
doing so sets the line of symmetry at an invisible point between two pillars, an even number on each side. but an odd total number of pillars makes the central pillar itself the line of symmetry. this does a couple things.
one, it upends the sense of community and equality. which i know sounds crazy, but really, a group of columns are all put there to hold up a structure. there’s no focus on one because they are all are working as supports.
symbolically, at least when first used in ancient greece, pillars represented people. and it makes sense for courthouses, especially, to want to show an even, fair, equal number of people on each side. no focus on any one, no inherent bias right off the bat just looking at it.
with an odd number of pillars, though, one will always be placed front and center.
and THEN. and then you walk in the courtroom itself (also odd-numbered blocks) and you are immediately opposite the judge, bdubs, located exactly centrally. and true, courtrooms are often set up like this anyway. but bdubs ups the ante and reaffirms that no, focus is on him by staging it all as a daytime court show, boom mic just over his head, cameras pointed in, spotlights on him.
literally by design, it was not built for justice. it’s built for show, for entertainment. and just look at the credits to know exactly what sort of message you’re supposed to be getting from this show.
the biblical story he used, with king solomon. it’s about king solomon. isn’t really about the trial itself, or the babies, or the women. it’s about showing (off) how wise and just he is. that’s the point. hm. interesting.
now, getting to the second point that etho also picked up on: it feels like a prison.
it’s not just the color palette. when your eyes naturally draw to the center point, you aren’t seeing an open space. instead of feeling like an arch or gateway or otherwise some kind of opening, the pillar there makes it feel closed off. the overall effect is that of prison bars. not pillars lining the entrance to a place of order or a temple. bars of a cage, a cell.
imagine the lincoln memorial were set up with 11 or 13 pillars. he’d look so much more trapped in there.
having a central pillar blocks the entrance. it’s not welcoming. you have to go around it; it’s immediately inconveniencing you. and when you go to leave, it’s there blocking you again.
this courthouse was not designed and built to be fair, nor accomodating, nor equitable, on any terms. even if unintentional, i wouldn’t call it so much coincidental as i would… subconscious.
after all, y’know. form follows function.
#this came about by me being like ew why are there an odd number of pillars that’s such a faux pas and just overall odd (haha) choice#but then i was like oh wait. there’s something to this#i dont think it looks BAD. i just think that odd number of pillars causes problems and maybe it doesnt stick out to other people as much#but it bothers ME. okay#bdubs#bdoubleo100#hc10#hermitcraft#mightaswellspeak
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silence immersed the room as the door clicked shut behind you. the ticking clock a reminder of how little time you have.
“you’re such an asshole, you know that?” you spewed to the male in front of you, your features displaying a look of anger.
katsuki rolled his eyes. “well, it’s not like i get called a ray of fuckin’ sunshine. what else did you honestly expect?” he crossed his arms over his chest, taking a seat atop of the long metal table.
“not much, yet you still seem to subceed my expectations.”
“subceed? seriously?” katsuki paused to let a scoff escape his lips. “you’re upset because i’m actually selling this story? the only one, might i add. this was your shitty grand idea!”
unknowingly, you took a step forward.
“the idea was to make it known we disliked each other. not for you to publicly shame and insult me!”
you, katsuki and a few other heroes were invited to attend a press conference. while the original topic was to discuss about the mission you all completed the day before, the topic began to stray away and focus on the relationship between you and katsuki.
japan knows of the hatred you and katsuki shared between each other, that was no unknown fact. the media described you two as fiery rivals considering both of your quirks contained fuel.
you two despised each other. or at least that’s the lie you fooled everyone with.
you were unsure when katsuki started to look appealing to the eye, how attractive he was when he was drowned in sweat, how you began to long for the small but noticeable glances he sent you in public. you couldn’t tell when it happened. but before you knew it, a small pool of desire that had katsuki’s name printed on it began to fill every minute of the day.
“which is no different than what we used to do. you want them to believe it? then don’t take my shit. suck it up and be a bigger asshole than i already am.” he was right. you know he was right. but it was so difficult to pretend as if you hated him.
even if you called him a bitch, or a cunt, maybe even call him out for having a small dick—which you know is far from the truth—that still wouldn’t deny the peace you felt whenever you were with katsuki. how the world seemed to stop still on its axis. how there were no rain, wind or time. just pure bliss.
fuck.
out of everyone, it just had to be him? his captivating, intense ruby irises. his brash, abrasive demeanor. only his words that could seem to sway you. the man the world deemed you to abhor.
instead of admitting the truth, you twist his words. “well, i’m pleased to know it’s so easy for you to do.”
“jesus fuck, y/n.” now, katsuki rose from his position, never once breaking eye contact with you. “you think this is easy for me? you think i like getting up there and lying through my teeth? doing this is the one of the hardest things i’ve ever done.”
he walks closer and even closer to you, minimizing the distance you established for good reasons. this is how it always happens; one of you forgets about the space you two have to maintain until words don’t seem to work anymore. instead, your lips weave together, forming a new way to communicate.
but you don’t move. you don’t want to.
“is it? all those insults feels like it comes pretty smooth to you.”
katsuki pauses as he takes a second to analyze you. his eyes scan your body then leading right up to your face.
“because those are the words i wish i could mean. every time, it burns me to say those things about you when i’d rather be up there claiming every single part about you.” he lowered to a whisper, but his voice maintained a fervent tone.
his hand raises, slow and steady. he cups your cheek, gently swiping his thumb across your cheek. instinctively, you lean into his palm, your eyes softening as you gaze into his eyes.
“you think i enjoy this?” you watch his jaw tighten, his hand dropping to your hip. “think i like watching you talk with those eager men? it takes everything in me to not beat them shitless for daring to come across you. do you know how hard it is to fight the urge to pull you in and show them that you’re not available?”
too captivated by his words, you didn’t notice how katsuki lowered his head. you could feel the heat of his body from how he gave you no room to breathe. he placed his lips on your soft skin, slowly kissing the side of your neck.
no. resist him. your mind was screaming. this couldn’t go on forever. at some point, you guys had to stop.
“what will make them back off? if i mark you up? think they’ll understand then?” he proposed the question, but to you, it seemed more like he was asking for permission.
you didn’t know what effect katsuki placed on you to have you like this. but in this moment, you didn’t care about the rumors, the consequences, your image. it was all pushed back in the back of your head. so, you slightly tilted your head upwards, giving him more leeway to continue.
katsuki gripped your hips. not too strong to leave a mark but strong enough to squeeze a small moan out of you.
“don’t you fuckin’ understand, y/n?” he leans away to look in your eye.
“what?” you meekly responded.
“i go insane when it comes to you. i’m not the kind of guy that drools over any woman’s attention. but, you… fuck.” he stops himself, from what you can only assume was to control himself with whatever he was about to say. “not being able to have you only makes me crave you more.”
you stay quiet.
“you know how many times i’ve tried to resist you?”
“how many?” finally, you spoke.
“too many fuckin’ times. i’m done fighting it, y/n.”
confusion struck your face. “what do you mean?”
“be mine. forget the press, forget our pr managers. be with me.” katsuki brings you closer with the hand placed on your hip, the action drawing you to one conclusion.
he leans in and interlocks his lips with yours. immediately, you drown in the feeling of his soft but chapped lips that you couldn’t seem to push away. somehow, you find the strength to pull back from him.
“not here. not in pub-”
“yes here.”
with his tone, you could mistake him to be aggressive in this moment. but over the months, you managed to be able to read his eyes from the forbidden glances he’s sent your way; how he really felt through the way he wore his eyes.
katsuki’s eyebrows were slightly furrowed, his soft ruby eyes shifted from your lips to your e/c irises.
there was a look behind his eyes. there were more watchful, more tender than usual. almost as if he was pleading with his eyes. like he was begging.
so, how could you say no to him in this state? him being so vulnerable with you?
but that was always the problem.
you could never say no to katsuki bakugou, no matter what.
your arms wrap around his neck, drawing him in with your eyes. he inclined his head and laid his lips on your mouth. the silence that did wrap the room ten minutes ago was replaced with the noise of sloppy kisses, your mouths powering over each other.
you can feel your heart rate increase from the action, even more noticeably so when he entangles a fist in the back of your shirt. he needs you closer, maybe within his skin if possible.
following his action, you guide your fingers through his ash blonde strands, sending a shiver down his spine. he nibbles on the bottom of your lip, pulling it just slightly.
“we really shouldn’t be doing this.” your murmur, yet his ears catches it. “this would be the hottest topic for the media.”
a snicker parted his lips. “we just can’t be caught. but the day you stop being scared, i’m ready.” his words vague and simple, yet still holding so much promise.
“i hate you.”
and you did. you hated that he was too enticing. too irresistible.
“thought it was hard for you to say things you don’t mean?” he referred from earlier. of course, that was just like him. the same him you mistakenly fell for.
“just shut up.” was all you replied with before leaning back in to connect his lips with yours, choosing to help him with your statement.
this was supposed to be like a forbidden love trope but i think i just revealed how thirsty i am😔
#bakugou katsuki#bakugou smut#bakugou x reader#bnha#bnha bakugo katsuki#bnha bakugo x reader#bnha bakugou#bnha x reader#katsuki bakugo mha#katsuki bakugo x reader#katsuki bakugo fluff#katsuki bakugo my hero academia#katsuki bakugo imagine#katsuki x you#katsukibakugou#katsuki bakugou#my hero academia bakugou#mha bakugou#bakugo katuski#bakugou fluff#bakugou x you#bakugou x y/n#ao3 bakugou#katsuki smut#katsuki x y/n#my hero academia#mha bakugo katsuki#mha x reader#mha#bakugou x reader angst
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Bedtime Stories Pt 2 | Daniel Ricciardo x Author! Reader
Summary: Daniel made a silly little comment that lost him everything. Over a year later, he tries his hardest to fix his mistakes.
Warnings: Swearing. A tiny smidge of angst but mainly fluff. Redemption for Daniel.
Female reader with various faceclaims (pics found on pinterest). Takes place in 2023. For the purpose of the this, Daniel has been with AlphaTauri the whole time.
Part 1
Main Masterlist
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28•05•2023
danielricciardo just posted
liked by redbullracing, YourUserName and others
danielricciardo monaco, always a delight. P11. so close to the points but racing through your streets feels like being on a podium
4,337 comments
landonorris and whose attention are we trying to grab with that sexy last pic 👀
→ danielricciardo only yours, mate
→ User1 don’t act like you’re not dying inside because y/n liked this
→ User2 relax, they never unfollowed each other 🙄
maxverstappen1 you’ll get them next time, mate
→ danielricciardo fancy giving me a tow?
→ maxverstappen1 never
→ User3 i love their friendship so much
User4 um, did anyone see that y/n liked and then unliked this post
→ User5 omg yes! sis was caught stalking and we love her for it
→ User6 i too would thirst over my ex if he looked like that
kellypiquet we were watching the whole time
liked by danielricciardo
→ User7 what a weird comment to make?
→ User8 who’s we, kelly?
→ User9 what does this mean?
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04•06•2023
Tweet 1
User10 @ kikiki babe did you hit your head? is that why you were in the ER? they broke up
User11 @ kikiki maybe ask them to do a head scan whilst you're there 'cause ain't no way you saw here there
→ User12 literally. like why would she even be in spain right now?
Tweet 2
User11 i think we might have to apologise to @ kikiki
→ User10 can we really trust the wag page though? They did report that Lando was having a secret love child the other week..?
Tweet 3
User13 asking the real questions because she's not even hinted that she’s been writing so it’s not like she’s on a book tour or anything?
→ User14 some people are saying she could be on vacation but please, why would mother choose a holiday destination during a time that she knows is a GP?
User15 guys, guys, I think our sacrifice circle worked
→ User16 please, please, 🕯️🕯️
User 17 how poetic would it be though if they got back together during the spanish GP when they broke up at the spanish GP a year ago
User18 shouldn’t you know these answers, and that she was in spain, if you're her so-called updates page
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22•08•2023
YourUserName just posted
liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and others
YourUserName some big news approaching
6,349 comments
kellypiquet i can’t wait, my beautiful girl
→ YourUserName thank you for being my #1 support
→ kellypiquet thank you for letting me help plan
→ User1 what does this mean?
→ User2 miss piquet stop being so cryptic on socials
maxverstappen1 i’m very excited
→ YourUserName did kelly force you to write that because i could feel the excitement oozing through the screen
→ maxverstappen1 i wanted to say something worse
→ YourUserName i hope she leaves you
→ kellypiquet behave, you two!
→ User3 i live for max and y/n terrorising each other, even without danny ric being around to encourage it
bloomsburypublishing we look forward to the end result
User4 i’m sorry but is this a soft launch?
User5 who is that in the last slide, miss y/n?
→ User6 the inspiration behind a new romance we hope
User7 don’t be shy. tag him
User8 soft launches have recently become my least favourite thing
charles_leclerc are you perhaps writing my next plane read
→ YourUserName depends how long the flight is
→ User9 confirmation of a new book ya’ll!! everyone say thank you charles
User10 i like to be edged by her books, not by her hiding her man
User11 don't try and distract us with news of a new book, we wanna know who the feet belong to!
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01•09•2023
danielricciardo just posted
liked by maxverstapen1, yukitsunoda0511 and others
danielricciardo ciao a tutti. lovely sightseeing in beautiful Italy
6,445 comments
User12 you’re telling me that i’m currently in the same country as THE daniel ricciardo?
kellypiquet i’m still trying to recover from that hike
→ User13 kelly and max went on a double date with daniel and the new girl?!
→ User14 omg please be y/n. i can’t imagine kelly agreeing to it otherwise
User15 i know he's trying to distract us with his beauty but we see the last slide, daniel. we see it
pierregasly so you’re telling me that you were in milan and didn’t bother to come and see me? that’s it. i'm ending our friendship
→ danielricciardo i’m sorry, mate. i was doing more important things
→ pierregasly clearly ;)
User16 someone check on y/n, please
→ User17 babe is clearly having the time of her life in italy (yes, i'm delusional)
User18 does nobody find it odd that he’s posting a soft launch not long after y/n posted a soft launch
→ User19 i know! it’s only been three weeks since hers and he’s posting one
→ User20 i can’t decide whether they’re soft launching each other or he’s trying to make her jealous by flaunting a new relationship as well
→ User21 it HAS to be each other or i will die
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15•10•2023
lando.jpg just posted
liked by YourUserName, danielricciardo and others
lando.jpg so i attended this event… and no, it’s not mine before you all freak out
8,223 comments
charles_leclerc it was a beautiful day ❤️
alexandrasaintmleux i’m so thankful to have been a part of such wonderful memories
kellypiquet the most beautiful bride i have ever seen
maxverstappen1 this was a nicer caption than i expected from you
→ danielricciardo agreed
→ landonorris i take offence to that
User1 guys do we think kelly and max got married? they’ve both comments on this?
→ User2 yes but so did charles and alex so…
→ User3 plus, i know kelly is stunning but do we really think she would call herself the most beautiful bride in 3rd person?
georgerussell63 i’m surprised you remember much after the state you were in
→ landonorris excuse you but most of that was just pure happiness
hulkhulkenberg an amazing day
estebanocon so happy to have been a part of this
alex_albon how’s the hangover, mate
→ landonorris i didn’t drink that much!
→ georgerussell63 tell that to the bouquet that you puked on
→ landonorris i caught it so it was mine anyway
carlossainz55 beautiful photos. she’ll love those
→ User4 who’s she?!
lewishamilton🤍🩵
fernandoalo_official congratulations to the happy couple
User5 the entire grid are commenting on this post, clearly having been in attendance. who IS IT?
pierregasly c’était une belle mariée
liked by YourUserName
User6 guys, y/n’s name on socials just changed from y/l/n to ricciardo
liked by danielricciardo
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03•04•2024
YourUserName just posted with danielricciardo
liked by kellypiquet, maxverstappen1 and others
YourUserName my husband helped with this project. baby ric coming aug 2024
9,550 comments
kellypiquet you will be the most beautiful mother. i’m so honoured to be part of this with you 💕
→ YourUserName stop you’re going to make me cry. you’ll be the most perfect godmother
→ kellypiquet i still think you should've married me instead
maxverstappen1 i call godfather
→ landonorris no you don’t get to call godfather! you already got to be a groomsman
→ maxverstappen1 yeah because who helped get them back together
→ YourUserName kelly
→ danielricciardo me
→ YourUserName no, babe
danielricciardo and before you all ask, no I haven’t stopped crying since she told me
→ kellypiquet me too, dan, me too
maxverstappen1 on a serious note, i am very happy for the two of you. y/n will be a wonderful mother, and daniel, he’ll be there also
charles_leclerc i am so excited. alex keeps telling me to stop buying baby things for you guys but i just don’t listen
→ YourUserName well at least you can safely say that uncle charl bought little mcqueen’s love
→ User7 uncle charl!!!!
lewishamilton congratulations, you two. y/n looks amazing
fernandoalo_official how lovely 💚
User8 omg it WAS their wedding lando attended!!!!!
hulkhulkenberg baby ricciardo!!
pierregasly congratulations. i can’t wait to be uncle GASSLYYYYYY
alex_albon welcome baby ricciardo
→ lilymhe it’s not an alien, alex. you don’t have to greet it so formally
redbullracing we’re all so excited for the upcoming grid baby. working on a racer stroller right this minute
→ mclaren you stole our gift idea!
→ redbullracing you stole our driver!
carlossainz55 congratulations y/n and daniel 😄
mercedesamgf1 what wonderful news 🍼
landonorris i’m just so glad i can go back to calling you mum and dad without daniel wanting to drive his car into the barrier
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Please don’t hate me for this! I did say from the beginning that Part 2s would be redemption.
I’ve had this planned and written since before Part 1 was published so when half of you then asked for her to get with another driver/move on, I was like noooooo I’ve already planned their baby 😂
As always. Requests welcome. If you have requested, I promise I’m not ignoring it, it’s been added to my queue
Baby Fever Angst Part 1s
Max’s Version | Lando's Version | Lance’s Version
Charles’ Version | Oscar’s Version
Tag list
@bibissparkles @barcelonaloverf1life @rlalliehayes @dullypully @softtina @callsignwidow @lav3nder-haze @minkyungseokie @luvrrish @fall-bambi @evans-dejong @sadsierra2 @justdreamersdream @spookystitchery @dark-night-sky-99 @majusialikesfastcars @luckyladycreator2 @bborra @mrosales16 @reguluscrystals @tvdtw4ever @alwaysclassyeagle @gigicisneros @spanishcorndogs @thecubanator2 @goldenharrysworld @awritingtree @jxnellat @sbrn0905 @hc-dutch @buckybarnessweetheart @ironmaiden1313 @dreamercrowd @yourbane @reguluscrystals @peachiicherries @g-l-o-b-e-w-h-o-r-e @weekendlusting @leclercsluvs @hannannannannannah @lifeless-firefly @sinofwriting @exotic-iris13 @imperfect-paragon @dan3avocado @barcelonaloverf1life @avillagesperson @hard4ndsoft @justzluv @laneyspaulding19 @danielshoe @chocolatefanunknown @redcrescentmoons
Sorry if I missed anyone!
#formula 1#f1#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#formula 1 social media au#f1 social media au#social media au imagine#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 headcanon#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 headcanon#f1 one shot#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#daniel ricciardo#daniel ricciardo imagine#daniel ricciardo drabble#daniel ricciardo headcanon#daniel ricciardo one shot#daniel ricciardo fluff#daniel ricciardo smau#daniel ricciardo x reader
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Omg hi your writing is so so good!! So I just saw the new photos of Joost (with his broken phone etc) and I thought of a new story… can you maybe write something where Joost trips and has some small injuries like a scraped knee and elbow etc, and reader takes care of him??
I loooooove this! I also noticed that there's a red spot on his knee so I wondered if he actually fell down or something
kiss it better ~ joost klein one shot
My masterlist here ✨💌
Pairing: Joost Klein x female!reader
Description: A bloody scratch on your crush Joost's knee turns into an interesting opportunity for you.
Word Count: 1.1k
A/N: You already know, it's another friends to lovers one shot, i'm a sucker for those. I hope you like it, if you do pls show your support by reblogging ❣️❣️ send in requests i'm having fun with this! 💌
Warnings: blood, not proofread
Joost had always been clumsy. His drink accidentally slipping out of his fingers when grabbing it. Bumping into a corner when he just told a funny anecdote to his friends. You could even say that the way Joost stumbled into your heart was clumsy. Because he definitely didn't mean to do it, after all, you were just one of his friends. But there he was, definitely not leaving anytime soon - that you were sure of.
Your strategy for dealing with your uncurable crush on your friend was definitely unique. You and Joost were known within your friend group for being ultra-affectionate and flirty to one another. Always alternating between bickering and jokingly complimenting each other. Always making a joke out of every hug and touch you shared.
"Go get a room already," Apson would occasionally say with a roll of the eye and you both would laugh along but secretly you would wish that you could tell Joost about your crush earnestly. Instead, you hid it away under layers of jokes.
Right now you were watching Joost as you and your friends wandered through the streets of Vancouver. You were laughing as Joost walked backwards in front of you, his arms gesturing around wildly as he talked about an idea he had for a music video. You watched his steps intently as you already noticed this to be a risky situation for the clumsy man. You breathed a sigh of relief as Joost dropped the antics and decided to turn around to walk normally again. But as he did, you could only watch as he tripped over the seam of his long pants and fell on the concrete.
"Oh shit," your friends around you exclaimed. "Jooooost," they started to laugh as they realised that he must be not seriously hurt.
Joost sat down on the pavement, his legs bent at an angle and his hands behind him to prop himself up. You kneeled down between his legs to check on him.
"Are you alright?" you asked concerned.
"Yeah," Joost tried to press out a convincing laugh but you could see in his eyes that he must be either hurt or embarrassed by his fall - or maybe a mix of both. When you looked Joost in the eyes you saw him evading your gaze and for a second you were scared that he might start crying. You were glad that your friends didn't seem to pay much attention to the both of you since it was no news to see you lost in your own little world.
"Are you hurt? Let me see," you said and tried your best to be comforting for Joost.
Joost looked down at his hands to inspect them and you noticed a few scratches on one of his fingers. The phone he was holding in his hand was also shattered since Joost didn't use any protective phone cases.
"It's fine," Joost said unconvincingly.
"No, that sucks," you reaffirmed his feelings and softly touched his knee. Joost winced with a smile and you looked down to where your hand just touched. A small spot of red was bleeding through Joost's jeans where he must have scratched his knee during the fall. "Oh, I'm sorry," you said, instead caressing the side of his knee now. "Do you want me to kiss it better?" you said cheekily, right back with your flirty banter you two were so well accustomed to.
"Are you taking the piss out of me?" Joost asked with a pout.
"No, never," you tried to reassure him. "I'm serious," you said and reached into your bag to pull out a pack of tissues. You grabbed the bottom seam of Joost's jeans and looked at him for confirmation before he nodded. Your friends were still not paying much attention to you down on the floor as they instead talked and joked among themselves. You pulled Joost's jeans up until his bleeding knee was exposed. Using one of the tissues you carefully dabbed at the wound to remove the blood. Joost winced at the contact again. "I'm sorry," you said as you were finished.
After one moment of hesitation, you leaned down and pressed a light kiss on the skin of Joost's knee just above the scratch. You looked at Joost and saw a shy smile creeping up on his face so you decided to leave three other kisses on his knee for good measure.
"Better?" you asked.
"Yes, so much better," he said grinning.
"Is there anywhere else you're hurting?" you asked, feeling courageous.
"Here," Joost said and showed you the scratch on his hand which you had inspected earlier.
You carefully took his hand into yours and also cleaned off the blood using the tissue. Joost's hand wrapped around yours as you pulled it towards you until you also pressed a few gentle kisses around the fresh wound.
"Anywhere else?" you asked as you looked at Joost.
"Here," he said quietly and pointed to his lips. Your heart started racing.
"I don't see any scratches there," you teased. You wished you were alone in this moment and nobody would be here to see or interrupt.
"But I'm hurting," Joost said with a pout and you smiled.
Fuck it, you thought.
You leaned forward and cupped his cheek with one of your hands. Joost rested one hand on your waist. You made sure to plant the most gentle, sweetest and loving kiss on Joost's lips. As you leaned back again you both looked at each other and you wondered if this was one of those times when you would show each other affection or say something sickly sweet about the other person under the guise of it just being a joke. Something in Joost's eyes gave you the feeling that this might be different actually, that the both of you were earnest this time. Your heart was beating out of your chest as you decided to go in for another kiss, a second kiss you definitely couldn't play up for laughs anymore. It was longer and deeper and you could feel Joost leaning into you.
"Hey, look at Joost and (Y/N)!" Apson shouted in delight as your friends finally noticed what the two of you were up to.
You pulled away from Joost who looked at you biting down on his lips to hide a grin. You offer your hand to Joost as you get up and help him get up as well. The both of you just ignored the bickering around you as your friends tried to pry into what just happened. Instead, you just continued your path down to wherever you were going anyway. As you walk beside each other you take notice that Joost never let go of your hand, still firmly fitting around yours.
#tomhollandsblog#my fics#joost#joost klein#joost x you#joost klein x reader#joost x reader#joost klein oneshot#joost oneshot#joost klein imagine#joost imagine#joost fanfiction#joost klein fanfiction#joost fanfic#joost klein fanfic
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TEACHER'S PET - J. YUNHO
SUMMARY : being a fan of Jane Austen's novels, you should have guessed that your attraction for complicated love stories would put you in trouble at some point. but you wouldn't have imagined that the trouble in question would be named Jeong Yunho - your favourite professor.
-> pairing : literature professor!yunho x student fem!reader
-> words count : 30.4 k
-> genre : college au, smut & angst
-> warnings (w. some spoilers of the plot) : soft!dom!yunho x sub!reader, teasing, dirty talk, praising, marking, hair pulling, doggy, protected and unprotected sex, creampie, body worship, use of 'good girl' and 'slut', oral (f. and m. receiving), deep throating, cum play, manhandling, fingering, begging, riding, semi-public sex, yunho has a big cock, hand kink, facefucking, drunk sex, yunho is calling reader angel (yes, that's a warning), age gap (8 years), mention of fwb relationship w. san, cheating, mentions of family issues, self-depreciation
+ the way i'm depicting yunho does not represent him, it's only a work of fiction.
-> 18+ content bellow, minors dni
-> reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated ! sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language
-> author's note : should i say sorry for the enormous word count ? maybe. will i apologize ? not at all because i'm so fucking proud of this fic. it might be one of my favourite things i've ever written, i quite fell in love with reader this time lmaoo. i started the process of the plot back in january, and it took me more than 3 months to write this but it's amazing in my opinion, so i hope you'll like it as much as i loved writting it ! also that is such a detail but yes, prices are in euros in this fic because i'm french and i cannot physically write dollars and not feel weird, i'm sorry, bear with it. i should also say sorry for the angst but it don't wanna either, i already cried to myself when i put it into words, it's your turn to suffer.
-> playlist : older by isabel larosa - white mustang by lana del ray - crazy in love by sofia carlberg - middle of the night by elley duhé - reflections by the neighborhood - daddy issues by the neighborhood - babydoll by ari abdul - easier by bernard park - i love you by billie eilish
-> masterlist | ateez masterlist
Jeong Yunho had been the big sensation and the object of all conversations since he started teaching at your university. It was during your freshman year that he joined your college as the new professor of British literature. And honestly, just knowing that you wouldn’t be forced to listen to an old man repeating the same story about how he almost won the Pulitzer Prize twenty years ago over and over was already a relief. But the fact that your new teacher was also very attractive did get you even more interested in his classes.
Of course, at first, you were like all the other girls on campus, gushing over how handsome Mr. Jeong was, and how well the suits he always wore were perfectly fitting his tall frame. But you quickly discovered a dedicated and very good professor. He helped your whole promotion to go over all the things your old teacher should have presented to you, and thanks to him, you passed your exams. So even if you couldn’t ignore that he was very, very hot, you were mostly glad to have a professor as passionate as you about literature - his handsomeness was only the cherry on top.
Every time you had a class with him, you knew that this was about to be a good day, because they were always stimulating and never boring. And maybe, just maybe it was because you were always trying to contradict him. In your defense, Mr. Jeong always led you to approach a new subject with an interesting or controversial point of view, and you were often disagreeing, or had things to say about it. And since not many people in your class were really interested in British literature and were only here to admire your teacher for one or two hours, it was not rare for him and you to end up debating about anything and everything. And today was no exception.
“- What do you want me to say Y/N ? This is how things are, I can’t change them.
- Then you’ll have to convince me, Mr. Jeong.”
Your professor chuckled while shaking his head. You were always like this, always trying to get him to surrender and admit that you had the right answer. Yunho didn’t really understand if it was because you liked to be right or simply because you loved a little bit of challenge, but either way, he appreciated how attentive you were to his classes, and how you were trying to question everything every single time. It was stimulating for the class, for you, and even for him.
“- In this precise case, it is not my job to do that. The fact that you have your opinion on the subject is a very good thing, but there is no right or wrong answer. What we are trying to do here is simply to interpret what message Poe wanted to convey, we can never be sure if our interpretation is the one he had in mind. And I would love to continue this debate but it’s time for you to go, so don’t forget to read the extract of Wuthering Heights I gave you and I’ll see you next week.”
You rapidly packed up your things to run back to your dorms. Friday often meant a girl’s night out with your two best friends, and you wanted to have enough time to get ready. You three always got to the same bar where you met each other, one of the first nights you went out during your first year of college. You crossed paths with Lola first, the barmaid having messed up both of your cocktail orders. And both of you clicked instantly, despite her being two years older than you. At one point, while you were dancing together, you noticed a girl alone being clearly annoyed by a guy who repeatedly tried to touch her. So your new friend and you acted like you knew her and forced the guy to go away. It turned out that the girl you had kind of saved, Dia, was in the same major as you. You ended up spending the night all together and you kept in touch after that.
And despite Lola having finished her studies before Dia and you, she stayed around the city because of her work. So once in a while, you took the opportunity to go out at the bar where you met. And tonight was one of those nights, and after the exhausting week you had, you kinda needed it anyway. Your roommate, Dajeong, helped choose your outfit and you got ready together because she was also going out with some of her friends, chatting about your days and the new rumours about the basketball team. And of course, you had to dress up a little, putting on a skimpy, little black dress that did wonders to underline the curves of your body. During these concert nights you were going to, there were always a lot of pretty attractive men playing instruments, and that kinda got you going. So you didn’t put away the thought of finishing the night in someone else’s bed.
Dia picked you up to go to the bar where you joined Lola and immediately ordered your favourite drink. It felt good to finally rest after the awful week you had. It all started on Monday, when you slept in and missed your first class of the morning. And because you had to rush to the second, you forgot your lunch at home and the charger of your laptop. On Thursday, you forgot about the work session you had with some of your classmates for a group project and arrived late. And finally one of your professors claimed to be disappointed in you because you handed him your assignment one hour late because you had an unplanned class at the due date. So yeah, you really needed this drink with your friends.
“- So I didn’t warn you beforehand, but I’m gonna sing on stage tonight !”
You looked at Lola, dumfounded, while Dia squealed excitedly beside you. Your older friend had tried to make her music known for the past year and it was finally starting to work out for her. Lola was incredibly talented, so you were certain that she would succeed and you were also very very happy for her, a big smile stretching your lips as you gave her a hug.
“- Girl ! That’s incredible ! I’m so proud of you, you deserve it !”
Dia joined your hug, the three of you giggling.
“- I’m so fucking exited, we were waiting for it !”
It was still a little early, but the bar was already filled with people, and even if it was still pretty cold outside, you were immediately hit by a wave of heat as soon as you stepped in. You really loved the atmosphere of these kinds of nights, where everyone was friendly because they were only there to spend a good time. Lola had to go backstage to get ready, but you quickly stumbled on some of Dia’s friends with whom you talked for a while and since the vibes matched, you decided to stay together to enjoy the concert. One guy had particularly tried to get your attention, and you weren’t mad about it with how good he looked. He was very tall, and could seem intimidating but whenever he smiled or laughed, you could see how kind and sweet he was. While he was saying something to one of his friends, you quickly tapped on Dia’s shoulder.
“- Hey, what’s the name of your friend that’s very tall ?”
She answered you with a smirk, and mischievous glint in his eyes when she leaned towards you.
“- Why ? Does he interest you ?
- Maybe. So ?
- His name’s Mingi. Have fun girl.”
You slapped her arm lightly, rolling your eyes at her comment. But truly, you didn’t mind the playful bantering between the two of you, loving it even. You let her go back to her conversation while you offered yourself and Mingi another drink since you had finished your beer long ago. It happened that Mingi was just as interesting as you thought he would be, and you even spent the first few performances of the night simply talking with him, too immersed in the discussion to acknowledge your surroundings. It’s only when Lola got up on stage that you started to pay attention, cheering for her after she introduced herself to the public.
And honestly, she nailed it, hyping the crowd like she did that for her whole life. Dia and you surely clapped and screamed for her the loudest. Lola came to you as soon as she got off the stage, hugging both of you and thanking you for coming to see her and cheering for her. She looked the happiest when she was singing, and you couldn’t be more proud of her as all of Dia’s friends were congratulating and praising her. And from this point on, you didn’t have many clear memories, only knowing that you got drink after drink, getting more comfortable with each one.
Usually, you wouldn’t be all over someone you had just met, but Mingi was really a good guy, he was attractive and you were drunk, so you didn’t mind the way he was kissing you shamelessly, only kissing him back and letting him roam his hands all over your body. But as always when you were tipsy, your mind was jumping from one thing to another. It didn’t matter that you couldn’t see neither Lola nor Dia around anymore, all you wanted was another drink right now.
“- I’m gonna get one more beer, want one ?”
Mingi tried to stop you when you got up, stumbling a little while standing on your feet, the world spinning all around you.
“- Don’t you think you already drank enough Y/N ?
- You’re cute worrying about me ! I’m okay ! I’ll be back in a minute !”
You were practically screaming, and even with the loud music and voices of people around you, you were very loud, making your way over to the bar while chuckling to yourself the whole time. You dropped onto one of the stools in front of the bar, ordering yourself another beer. It’s only when you turned your head on your right side that you noticed someone you knew quite well.
“- Mr. Jeong !”
The said Mr. Jeong was straddled by your loud voice and even more by your body colliding with his as you kind of dropped your weight on him, circling him with your arms as if you were trying to hug him. For a few seconds, your teacher remained frozen in place, not knowing how to react, before his brain seemed to reactivate again, and pushed you off of him, holding you by your shoulders. Only a quick look at your flushed cheeks, lazy smile and glossy eyes was enough for him to guess that you were drunk.
“- Y/N ?
- That’s me ! What are you doing here though ? Teachers are not supposed to go out !”
Yunho couldn’t help but laugh quietly at your behaviour. You were always so neat and put together during his classes, always so focused and organised. So to see you let loose like this, wearing a skimpy little dress, obviously very drunk and your speech so slurred it was actually hard to understand you, was really a shock.
“- You’ll be surprised to know that I have a life outside of being your teacher.”
Yunho knew that he shouldn’t find the pout on your lips cute, but he did.
“- ‘m not surprised, you too hot to be a teacher.”
He blamed the alcohol for the way his heart started beating faster at your comment, and even more when you leaned against him once again, breathing in his scent.
“- ‘m so tired…
- Where are your friends ? Maybe they can get you home.
- Don’t know…”
You were starting to feel really dizzy. And not the kind of daze when you’re just feeling the agreable effects of all the drinks you had, it was the kind of daze when you’re starting to feel bad, when your head starts to hurt and all you want is your bed and silence. Yunho tried to observe the crowd and spot the friends he usually saw you hanging with around campus, but no one was in sight. So he stood up, paying for his last drink, before helping you walk towards the exit.
“- Where we going ?
- I’m driving you home. You’re clearly drunk and you lost your friends, it’s not safe for you to stay here alone.”
You were too far gone to be embarrassed about your behaviour, or to resist too much, so you let your professor drag you to his car and help you get inside, even buckling up your seat belt for you. You only find it in yourself to give him your address, and text Dia to warn her that you were getting home before dozing off. Yunho had to wake you up when he parked in front of your dorm.
“- We’re here, Y/N.”
You whined, claiming you were comfortable and didn’t want to move, that it was cold outside and the heat in his car was far much better. Yunho sighed while getting out of the car. Helping one of his drunk students get home was not really on his bingo card of the week, but he couldn’t risk you getting in a dangerous situation. He opened the car door on your side after having taken off his jacket, handing it to you as he helped you get out of the vehicle. No words were exchanged as you put on the black leather jacket that was obviously ten times too big for you, drowning your silhouette inside of it. But you could feel the warmth that Yunho’s body had left, and it made the cold of the wind outside less chilly.
“- You will be alright to get inside alone ?”
You nobbed your head, the nap you took during the way back to your dorm having sobered you up a little. Now, all you wanted was to wrap yourself in your sheets because you were starting to feel the second-hand embarrassment of this whole situation.
“- Thank you Mr. Jeong.
- You’re welcome Y/N, drink water and take a lot of rest, okay ?”
You nobbed once again, feeling your cheeks heating up when he pressed your shoulder lightly. You didn’t find anything to answer so you decided to simply get inside, not seeing how Yunho kept an eye on you until he was sure you got inside, and only did he drive off. When you pushed the door open, Dajeong was not back from her party yet, so you were met with a silence that instantly eased your headache. You rummaged through the drawers of the kitchen to find some painkillers and a glass of water, gulping the medication down before heading straight to your room. You hadn’t the energy to take off your makeup, nor your outfit, slipping in bed with Yunho’s jacket still on. But it smelled good, it was so warm, like a little cocoon you loved to be wrapped into. And maybe that was why you dreamed of him that night.
The days after this hell of a night, you were hit with the most terrible feeling of embarrassment and guilt you’ve ever felt. Embarrassment because it was definitely what you should feel after having to be driven home by one of your teachers because you were too drunk, and at that, a very attractive and smart teacher - and also your favourite one. Also to be seen in a state like this by him had you mortified. You always tried to remain serious and professional in front of Mr. Jeong, and you never wanted your personal life to interfere like that with your studies. Guilt because he was certainly there to enjoy his own night out and you wrecked that by forcing him to look after you like a little child. You even threw a tantrum because it was too cold, and every time you saw the jacket you even had the audacity to sleep into, you felt even more bad and ashamed of yourself. You didn’t even dare tell Dia and Lola who helped you get home, claiming it was only a guy you knew.
You also didn’t want rumors to spread. They were fast to go around students, and if you handed Mr. Jeong his jacket back after his class, it would have been enough for people to believe that you two were in a relationship. So you decided to go and see him after his classes in his office, to be sure that you wouldn’t be bothered. You had buried his jacket at the bottom of your bag, as if everyone had X-Ray vision and could see what was inside, walking as fast as you could through the hallways. You had done nothing wrong, but it still felt like it and you had to mentally prepare yourself for the conversation that was going to happen.
The door was open when you arrived at his office, but you still knocked on it lightly to signal your presence. Mr. Jeong immediately looked up from the assignments he was grading, smiling when he saw it was only you.
“- Come on in Y/N, and close the door behind you.”
You were fairly unable to utter a word, sticking to nodding your head as you did what he told you. Usually, when you came to his office, you would immediately sit down, but you didn’t feel at ease at all today, too shameful to even look at Mr. Jeong in the eyes.
“- Do you feel better than this weekend ? You didn’t seem very well yesterday either.”
The fact that he was still worrying about you was making you feel even more uncomfortable.
“- Uh, yes, thank you. Actually I came by to apologise for my behaviour. I was very drunk, and I didn’t know what I was doing anymore. Thank you so much for driving me home, and again, I’m sorry for how I acted and if I said anything disrespectful to you. And here’s your jacket, I washed it for you. And again, I’m so, so sorry.”
You got the jacket out of your bag, putting it on his desk, neatly folded. Your heart was beating unsteady and your breathing was loud. You couldn’t even remember if you actually said anything weird to him, but knowing you and how you had no filter when you were wasted, you surely did. Mr. Jeong stood up to get his jacket back, hanging it on the back of his desk chair. The smile on his lips was reassuring and sweet, and he didn’t seem mad at all, but you couldn’t help the anxiousness from taking over you.
“- It’s not that bad, it has already happened to everyone to be drunk and do stupid things, believe it or not, it happened to me too.
- To bother your teacher because you were completely wasted ?”
Yunho chuckled at your remark, and he was happy to see a small smile spread on your face too. You were always trying to not look him in the eyes since the beginning of the week, and you seemed very embarrassed when Yunho didn’t want you to be. He did that out of kindness, because you were one of his favourite students and also because he couldn’t let you alone when you were in this state, he couldn’t have looked at himself in a mirror if he had let you without anyone to look after you when you were so vulnerable.
“- Maybe not, but you get my point. It didn’t bother me, and you didn’t say anything strange, don’t worry. We can just forget all about that if you prefer, but I can assure you that you did not do anything wrong Y/N, I’m just happy I was able to get you home safely.”
Your shoulders immediately relaxed, and it was as if you could breathe more easily. You knew that your professor was honest, that he wouldn’t lie to you about something like that.
“- Thank you so much for taking care of me. I gotta go for my next class now, but really, I���m very grateful Mr. Jeong.
- No problem, just be more careful next time.
- Of course. Have a good day !”
He greeted you back, watching as you left his office and closed the door behind you. And finally, Yunho allowed himself to slump back in his desk chair, sighing loudly. He didn’t lie to you, didn’t tell you that to make you feel better. Except the fact that you did say that you found him hot. That compliment really messed up with his mind. You were always so serious and focused during his classes, and of course, it was obvious you wouldn’t spend your weekends locked up in your room, but seeing you like this was so new, so unusual. The way you looked at him, the way you touched him, the way your dress was riding your thighs up, the way his jacket was now smelling like your intoxicating perfume - the scent of you invading the room little by little. Everything about this was making him see you in a whole different light.
The only thing Yunho promised himself when he became a professor was to never, ever, find one of his students attractive. Maybe it was because he was young, and much closer to your age when he started teaching, and that he quickly noticed the eyes some of the girls were giving him. Anyway, he swore on his dignity and morals that he would never have this type of thoughts about a student. But now that he got to see you in your skimpy black dress, which was hugging every one of your curves perfectly, while looking him in the eyes and confessing how hot he was may have him reconsidering his decision.
He knew he shouldn’t see you this way, he knew he shouldn’t search your profile on instagram, knew that he shouldn’t look at your photos nor check you out in your pretty little outfits that you loved to post. But he did it anyway, scrolling through your account as if he was a teenager all over again. And when he stumbled over the photos you posted this summer, body on display in your little bikinis, he knew he had to stop before his thoughts started to drift to places he shouldn’t. Because it was dirty, it was disgusting and he shouldn’t think about you, his student, this way. This should have been enough to stop his mind from going back to this night, but it didn’t. And Yunho felt incredibly bad for not being able to control himself.
You felt a little better since your conversation with Mr. Jeong, reassured that you did not say anything weird to him, and that you haven’t made him uncomfortable. That didn’t ease your mind from the fact that you slept in his jacket and even had the nerves to feel cosy because you were surrounded by his scent. But you tried your best to forget it all, just like he advised you to, even if you had to be honest and admit that you did often think about the way he held you by your waist when he helped you walk to his car.
You shook your head as you tried to concentrate back on the synopsis of the book you had in hand right now. You decided to go to a book shop with Dia this afternoon after your classes. It was something you loved to do together from time to time, always promising yourself that you won’t buy anything but coming back home with at least one new book anyway. You were not paying attention to your surroundings, entirely focused on the book you were looking at, and you didn’t feel it when someone came up behind you.
“- I see that you’re very dedicated to my classes Y/N.”
You turned around quickly, not needing to see him to recognize the familiar voice of your teacher. He was standing there, dressed more casually than the usual suits he was always wearing for class, only in black pants and a creamy sweater. You tried not to make the blush on your face obvious as you composed yourself before answering.
“- Well, your recommendations are always great Mr. Jeong, so I might listen to you once again. But only if it gets me one bonus point on my next assignment.”
Yunho couldn’t help the cheeky smile that spreaded on his face whenever you teased him. It wasn’t the behaviour students should have towards their teacher, but he liked it too much to ask you to stop.
“- You know very well that I don’t get corrupted this easily.
- And if I bring you some chocolate ?
- Then I might reconsider your proposal.”
You were ready to add something when you were interrupted by the loud ringtone of your phone. You excused yourself and turned around to answer the call. Yunho didn’t mean to eavesdrop on your conversation with a certain “Sannie”, but at the same time, if it was that private, you would’ve walked away, right ? He wondered if you were used to giving surnames like that to every one of your friends or if this guy could be your boyfriend. But why would that interest him in the first place anyway ? It wasn’t like he cared if you were single or taken. And it was none of his business, but still, the question slipped past his lips when you hung up.
“- Was that your boyfriend ?
- Oh, no, not at all ! San is my best friend, he has been since we were kids.”
Yunho only nodded, already feeling the second-hand embarrassment of asking such a personal and inappropriate question. He needed to get out of here so you didn’t notice the way his ears were heating up, and you gave him the perfect opportunity to do just that.
“- I have to go but I’ll get this one.
- Feel free to share your thoughts about it.
- I’ll do it, thank you. Have a good day Mr. Jeong.
- You too Y/N.”
And you left with a warm smile, asking yourself if you would have a stranger interaction than this one in your life. How come that one of the most handsome men you’ve ever met, who also happened to be your teacher, wanted to know about your love life ? You didn’t know how to handle this fact, didn’t know why he asked you that either. But it was messing with your head, making you think about things you shouldn’t, about things you never even considered before this night. Well, that was a bit of lying to yourself. Because you did think about him in this light before, did dream about him touching you in such inappropriate ways for a teacher and his student. But you pushed these thoughts away, not ready to dig into why he was making you feel like that and wouldn’t leave your mind.
And Yunho couldn’t help thinking the same : how he didn’t see you like that before having you all pliant in his hold, before seeing you wearing your little black dress, before hearing you calling him hot. But if he was honest with himself, he did think that you were pretty during the first class you had with him. He did think on numerous occasions that you were smart and the kind of person he would love to go out with. But he couldn’t. Because he was your teacher, and because he was a lot much older than you. It would be inappropriate.
Even with all of these considerations in mind, Yunho couldn’t stop himself from stealing glances at you every time you stepped a foot into his classroom. He tried to be as subtle as possible because he didn't want to make this situation even weirder than it already was, especially for you. Little did he know you did the same, observing him every time he wasn’t looking your way, struggling to not blush whenever you felt his eyes on you. And Yunho kept telling himself that he couldn’t do that, that it was not right to look at you the way he did, to think about the things he was thinking about every time his eyes landed on you. But he couldn’t stop it. It felt wrong, but for some kind of reason, he was unable to forget about you.
“- Did the Mr. Jeong hype finally get to your head ?”
You wiped your head towards Dia, heart beating unsteady. She couldn’t know about what happened almost three weeks ago, right ? No she couldn't have guessed, except maybe if someone saw him driving you home. But your friend only chuckled and slapped your arm when she saw the defeated expression on your face.
“- You look like you saw a ghost ! It’s alright bestie, I wouldn’t judge you for finding him handsome, it’s a fact everyone already established.
- Why are you saying that now ?
- Because you’ve become very distracted whenever we have classes with him, and you don’t participate as much as before. Is it because you finally see him like we all do ?”
You groaned and shook your head, but Dia was too close to the truth to not unsettle you. You knew that you did nothing wrong, that it was normal to think that your obviously very attractive teacher was, in fact, very attractive. But you couldn’t kill the guilt creeping in every time you looked at his hands handing back the papers a little too long, or when you caught yourself wondering if his skin smelt as good as his leather jacket did.
“- First, I’ve never said that he isn’t good looking, and second, I have enough decency to not drool over him during said classes.”
Lie. It was a complete lie. But Dia didn’t need to know that. She didn’t need to know that your professor had invaded your thoughts in a way you didn’t think would be possible, and in a way that was definitely not appropriate.
“- Decency doesn’t exist when he enters the equation.”
She was not entirely wrong, but you couldn’t let her win, because it would be like admitting to yourself that you did thirst over your teacher, more than you would like to. Luckily for you, Yunho quickly started his class and strangely enough, for the first time since the bar incident, you succeeded in following everything he was saying and not getting too distracted by his hands, or by his smile.
“- Before I let you go, I wanted to inform you that I decided to create a debate club. I’m aware of what you must all think about these : that they are boring and never pick the subjects you want to discuss. That’s why you’ll be the ones to propose the subjects we will tackle, and you’ll be free to talk about anything you want. It can be music, politics, literature - anything. As long as you respect each others’ opinions, it’s okay for me. If you’re interested, write your name on the sheet on my desk before leaving and that’s all for today. Thank you for your attention, and have a good day.”
Conversations about Mr. Jeong’s propositions were already erupting all around the classroom. You spotted some serious students you already had study sessions with writing down their names, and a bunch of girls who just wanted to check out the teacher for one more hour per week. Dia already warned you that she didn’t have the time to engage in such activities, but you thought it couldn’t be that bad of an idea. After all, you really loved to discuss with people, and this was the perfect occasion to do so. And no, it was not because your professor will be there. Not at all. It only happened that he will animate the whole thing, it was only a coincidence. You got a pen out of your bag and started to write down your name when his now familiar voice interrupted you.
“- I could’ve bet on this.”
You didn’t dare lift your head and meet his gaze, because locking eyes with him in class was one thing - he was far away from you - but having him so close to you suddenly made you nervous.
“- Am I so predictable ?
- A little, but I’m not complaining. I know that at least one person will actually come and that I will not be alone.”
This time, you had no other choice but to look at him as you had finished writing your name and had no excuse to look at the piece of paper anymore. You knew you shouldn’t feel like this, but your heart still missed a beat when your eyes finally dived into his. You quickly avoided his gaze, pretending to put your pen back in your bag while you searched in your brain to offer him a clever response.
“- You know me, I’m always here when it comes to debating.
- I wouldn’t have expected less from you Y/N.”
The way he said your name shouldn’t have made you blush, but it did. You rapidly excused yourself before literally running away from the classroom and all these feelings that shouldn’t invade your mind. It even made you hesitate on your decision to join the debate club. But you didn’t want Mr. Jeong to think that you were not serious. So you went anyway. And even if, as you predicted, not that many people showed up, you still had a good time. You were even able to not think about him in ways you shouldn’t too often. That was until he insisted on giving you all his personal phone number, so he could organise things more easily and give you the opportunity to see museums or expositions you could later discuss on. That was a perfectly sensible decision, obviously.
However, that night when you laid in your bed and couldn’t fall asleep, your fingers hovered over his contact. It was stupid to even think about it. Why would you even send him a text ? And to say what ? Ask him if he had a good day ? Or if he planned anything for the next reunion ? It was stupid, yeah. But you were one click away from sending a text. You threw your phone to the other side of your bed, running your hands over your face. You were so stupid. Stupid for thinking about Jeong Yunho as anything else than your teacher, stupid for thinking that he would even look your way, stupid for thinking that you were any different from all the girls who were swooning over him. You were just like them and even worse.
The next meeting with the debate club came too quickly for your liking as you were not mentally prepared enough to see the teacher you couldn’t help thinking about all day long. But this was not what occupied your mind today. No. It was this one girl who thought that she was always right just because she said so. Ever since Mr. Jeong announced that the subject was going to be about music and the sense of community it could create, she hadn't shut up, interrupting everyone as if her opinion was more important. And she wouldn’t stop whining about the fact that music was too commercial these days and that there was nothing original anymore, when her playlist was essentially composed of trending songs and Taylor Swift (not that you had something against the girl, you loved some of her songs, but she was far from not being commercial.) And when you tried to argue that, no, music was not only commercial, that there were still good artists and groups that did it because they truly enjoyed and loved making music, she would get mad. Everytime someone else would defend your point of view, she would accuse them of teaming up against her.
And you were actually a little mad at your teacher for not jumping in and telling something to this girl who was clearly being unreasonable. You ended up saying that you didn’t want to talk anymore, because even if you were not one to give up, you clearly noticed that you couldn’t win this time. You spent the rest of the debate sulking and stealing glances at Mr. Jeong, who was just observing the chaos. You didn’t understand why he would not intervene, and yes, you got that he wanted to let everyone express their opinions, but was it relevant in this case ? You packed up your things rather quickly ; this whole situation put you into a bad mood, and you just wanted to forget it.
“- Y/N ? Are you alright ?”
His voice straddled you as he came closer to you, letting all the other students go out behind the two of you.
“- Oh, uh, yeah, I’m good. Just a little frustrated, but it’s alright.
- I understand, but this moment is also made for that, even if you’re not agreeing with her, you have to respect it.
- I know, I don’t have a problem with her not being on my side, I just don’t like it when people victimise themselves to make me feel bad and let them have the last word. That’s not what a debate is about.”
You tried to stay focused on your bottle of water in your hands, and to not stare at him too much. He was wearing one of his black suits once more, and even more since the bar incident, it was doing something to you.
“- Well, I can’t say you’re wrong, but not everyone here is as mature as you are. You have to take it into consideration. And it is by talking with people like you that people like her will get it and grow up.”
You shrugged, turning your head to the side because you couldn’t hold his gaze anymore. You knew deep down that he was right, but you were too frustrated to admit it right now.
“- I’ll let you sleep on that Y/N, but don’t let it deter you from coming next time, your interventions are important and I value them. A lot.”
You nodded before saying your goodbyes and quite literally running away from him, once again. He couldn’t make you feel so frustrated you wanted to break something, and the next second made your heart beat like crazy. Because his words surely did. You knew by the way he was often relying on your answers in class that he must appreciate you as a student, but to be aware that he also liked who you were as a person was something else. It was getting bad, really bad, because you couldn’t keep under control the feelings he made appear in you. And you knew it was wrong, knew that he was your teacher, knew that he probably - surely - didn’t feel the same, but you were already in too deep.
And Yunho couldn’t help thinking the same as he watched you go away. He shouldn’t feel such attraction for his students, and he shouldn’t try to get closer to you, and he shouldn’t try to do all these things that led you to be alone with him. But still, he chose the next subject because he knew he would get a reaction out of you, because he knew it would get you all passionate about it and he loved when you were like this.
He didn’t miss his shot because you were the first to talk when he announced that today’s session will be about Jane Austen and feminism. Yunho knew she was one of your favourite authors as you often quoted her in your assignments and used her novels as examples, so he was even aware of your opinion on them. Thus as he was regularly doing during his classes, he decided to go against your views, just to see how you would react. It was wrong to do it only to see you get passionate and involved and slightly mad at him - because you both knew that he already told you that he agreed with your ideas.
“- I understand what you’re saying Y/N, but the fact that Austen never got married but still insisted on talking about marriage in every one of her novels could also show that it was a dream of hers, and not feminism.”
Again, you were feeling so frustrated against your teacher. But this time, it was directed straight to him. You couldn’t figure out why he would do this, nor why he was so dedicated to debating with you in particular, and not with all the other students that were agreeing with you.
“- On this aspect, her personal life has nothing to do with it. On the contrary, it reinforces what she’s showing. In Pride and Prejudice for example, Lizzie doesn’t accept Darcy’s proposal until he changes and really proves that he loves her. Plus Darcy doesn’t do all these things so she would agree to marry him, he does it only because he loves her truly. She depicts marriage as something you should do out of love, the only happy marriages in her novels are the ones where the two parties are in love with each other. Like Jane and Bingley, and you can contrast with Lydia and Wickham and how their union is never shown as a good thing, for either them or the Bennets’. I think she never got married because she despised the men of her era, and that they wouldn’t meet her expectations, because she wanted a marriage of love, not of arrangement, or relationships or money. That’s why she is showing them so much in her books, because it reflects how she didn’t like the view on marriages during the Victorian era and the sexism she was surely enduring because of her being a writer and not trying to hide it.”
You barely breathed in between your sentences, and when you finally stopped talking, you felt like you just ran a marathon. Mr. Jeong’s gaze never left yours as you spoke, and the intensity of it was making butterflies come alive in your stomach. It was as if you could feel the tension emanating from him, from his eyes staring down at you. He seemed to snap out of his haze when someone voiced out their agreements to your little speech. And after that, he quieted down just as you did. But you could still feel him stealing glances at you, and you couldn’t help doing the same.
He was wearing another one of his suits - a three piece grey suit, with thin, white strips on it. He had let go of the jacket a long while ago, and had rolled the sleeves of his shirt up his forearms. And you knew you shouldn’t find that attractive, but you did. You did and it was wrong ; because he was your teacher, and because you were supposed to be a little mad at him for refuting the obvious.
So like a replay of last week, you stayed back, taking your time to pack up your things and waiting until everybody else left to talk to him one on one. Maybe it wasn’t what a good and well behaved student should do, maybe it wasn’t the most appropriate thing to do when you were feeling so attracted to him. Maybe. But you still carried on with your plan, trying to not get distracted by his handsome face, and his pretty hands arranging some papers on his desk.
“- Why do you keep on pushing me to justify myself like that ? It’s embarrassing, and everyone was so silent afterwards, it was as if I said something wrong, and it’s not agreeable to feel like you are being ridiculous.”
You never had enough nerves to talk to one of your professors like that, but maybe it was the fact that you had a pretty shitty week, or that the way he was looking at you had you feeling some ways you didn’t want to, but you felt a sudden rush of energy and courage coursing through your veins.
“- You did not say anything stupid Y/N, it was very clever on the contrary. And the reason I keep doing that is because I know you have it in you to argue with me and produce this kind of well organised speech. That’s where I want to bring all of my students, but you can always improve and develop your skills. This is what I’m training you for.
- I’m not practising to go to war, Mr. Jeong. All this is not necessary if it makes us feel bad. And why would you do that in front of other students when we already talked about this in class and they all saw you agree with me ?
- I told you, it’s only because I want you to be able to justify your answers with precise examples like you did today, because it’s important for your future assignments, for your thesis and even just in everyday life.
- But you know I’m already able to do all that, so why would you seek out my responses everytime ? It feels like you’re targeting me.”
Your cheeks were heating up as time went on, not only because you felt hot from the way all his attention was entirely focused on you, but also because you were so frustrated you could’ve yelled at him. But you had to remind yourself that he was your teacher and that you couldn’t be that disrespectful, that this was the closest you could get to having an argument with him without getting kicked out of your university. He had come closer to you as the discussion progressed, and the sudden proximity between your two bodies didn’t help with your red cheeks.
“- Yes, I’m targeting you, because I know you’re capable of coming up with things like this, and that you teach a lot to other people by doing so. I love to see you being passionate and invested in the subjects you’re talking about, it makes it fluid to listen to and to understand. Plus, that’s a debate club, disagreeing with you is my job here.”
You wanted to stay calm and collected so bad, wanted to stay as composed as he always was but you couldn’t help how he heightened all your emotions by his mere presence. And the compliments he was giving you didn’t help you relax either.
“- Yes, okay, but not when you said you approved my views two weeks ago just to change your mind now and make me look like I’ve been talking nonsense all this time.
- Don’t rely on me and my opinions Y/N, rely on you and what you’re thinking. Do not let other people dictate what you should think on a subject you know and love.
- I know that, I’m not dumb, but you’re not just everyone else. You’re my teacher and you know what you’re talking about while I don’t. I’m only making assumptions and theories when you give us facts. It’s not the same.
- I don’t know it all, what we're making when talking about books and authors who are not here to confirm or deny is always assumptions. You know that I agree with what you said, you know my opinion on Austen and that’s all that matters.
- But you made it look like what I was saying was irrelevant, you made me look like a fool and I don’t like it, especially when it’s coming from you.”
The two of you had gotten closer and closer, and you were now facing each other, with nothing in between to separate you anymore. Suddenly, you felt an overwhelming need to breathe in his scent, to take the step ahead that was distancing you from him and cut off the act.
“- What do you mean especially when it’s coming from me ?”
Your breath accelerated when Yunho stepped forward one more time, getting way much closer than decency would allow. But you didn’t make any movement to escape. Because deep down, you wanted this, you craved this. You saw his hand coming up to your face before feeling his fingers brushing against the skin covering your jaw, leading you to raise your head and dive into his eyes. You’ve never seen him from this angle, but with the light of the late afternoon casting shadows on his face, he had never looked prettier.
“- I asked you a question, Y/N.
- I… It’s inappropriate, I shouldn’t say it, I shouldn’t even think about it.”
Despite your words that should deter him from going any further, he swiped his thumb across your bottom lip, smearing your lip gloss. You could hear your own heart beating, aware of every breath you took and every movement of your body. When your eyes met his once again, it was as if adrenaline was spreading through your veins, a sensation that gave you the impression that you were flying. Your gaze flicked down to his lips one second too long for him not to notice and that was Yunho’s last straw as he let his hands drop down to your waist.
“- I don’t think I should think about what is on my mind right now either.”
As if it was the hint you needed, you grabbed his neck to pull him down to your level. Your lips brushed against his one time, and the next time they met, it was for a real kiss. Yunho squeezed your waist tighter, tugging you closer to him as he let his desire take over his reason. He shouldn’t do that, but your lips tasted like the vanilla chapstick you were always putting on during his classes and that he was dying inside to kiss away.
It was like your mouth had a mind on its own, kissing your teacher like your life depended on it. You weren’t thinking about the fact that anybody could come in and interrupt you, you weren’t thinking about the fact that what you were doing was forbidden. All you felt was the softness of his hair between your fingers, his large hands on your lower back, and his tongue playing with yours. It all felt too good to stop.
“- Where are you going ?”
You were putting on your shoes when Dajeong’s voice interrupted you, a knowing smile on her lips. She knew very well where you were going every time you left late at night, during the weekends, she just wanted to tease you.
“- San invited me over, I’m gonna stay the night.
- Of course you are.”
She gave you a little slap on your ass before going back to the series she was watching on the living room TV. Usually, you would’ve laughed or been as excited as her to see your friend but not today. When San had proposed to you to come to his apartment to fool around, you weren’t surprised. It happened often, when neither of you wanted to be alone, when you needed someone to relieve the pressure. And most of the time, you really enjoyed the time you spent together, fooling around without any feelings. But tonight, it was for more selfish reasons that you said yes.
Because when San was touching you, you were only able to think back to how Yunho’s fingers squeezing your waist felt. And when he kissed you, you could only think back to the way Yunho’s lips made your whole body come alive again. And when he fucked you, you wished it could be Yunho instead. You felt bad, both because you were using your friend to quit thinking about someone else, and because that someone else was your teacher.
It shouldn’t have felt so good to kiss him, it shouldn’t have sparked a flame and made you crave more, it shouldn’t have made you want to drop to your knees for him. You should’ve been disgusted with yourself and what you did, you should’ve been apologising to him the very next day. But you couldn’t bring yourself to hate this moment, nor to forget it. It was engraved in your memory, enough for you to search him up on social media even when San was holding you in his arms, both of you still naked. It was wrong, once again, but you already crossed the line too many times to count, so who cared anymore ?
For a few weeks, you didn’t even dare to look at him too long, afraid to remember once again how delicious his lips felt on yours. And you didn’t feel his eyes following your every movement like you grew used to. It felt weird, to not have his gaze focused on you, and to see him avert even looking your way during each one of his classes. You stopped going to the debate class, and you stopped answering every one of his questions during lectures.
And Yunho felt like he had fucked everything up. He should’ve stopped when he started to be attracted to you. He should’ve stopped when he started to seek out your presence even more. He should’ve stopped before kissing you. After you ran away last time, he considered sending you a text to apologise, and ask you to not say anything about what happened. But he didn’t, he wanted to let you breathe and have some time for yourself. Except that he started to get worried about the situation. You hadn’t tried to talk about it with him, you hadn’t come to the debate class since this incident. He spent all his time trying to figure out how to handle the mess he created. That was the question going through his mind once more when you stepped into his classroom for the debate club, looking around to see that no one except you and him were here.
“- Uh… I’m sorry, did I miss something ?”
Yunho turned to you, and for the first time in weeks, he really looked at you, taking in your silhouette and your outfit - one of the little skirts you loved so much, and your signature black, thigh boots. He should’ve been stressed to see you again, anxious to have to talk to you about this kiss. But instead he felt relief wash over him, and it was like he could breathe again. He looked down at the paper covering his usually organised desk, realising that he had to answer you, even if his voice was shaking a little.
“- I cancelled today’s reunion, I wasn’t feeling very well.”
You nodded your head, looking around the classroom as if you were searching for something. You debated in your head if you should address the subject with your teacher or not. You were too nervous to talk about it, afraid that he would act like it didn’t ever happen, or worse, as if it didn’t mean anything to him. You were about to go away, to run away, like the other time, when you heard his voice behind you, loud and clear.
“- Wait ! Please, wait. We need to talk.”
You hesitated for a few moments, your hand hovering above the doorknob. Yunho saw your arm drop by your side before you turned around, taking some steps in his direction, and he was already relieved that you weren’t going to find him disgusting or scream at him. He didn’t need much time to figure out what he was going to tell you, having replayed this exact scene again and again in his head, too many times for his own good.
“- I have to apologise for what happened last time. It was never my intention to make you feel uncomfortable, or to scare you away. And I’m also sorry for kissing you like that, it was wrong of me, I should’ve never done that. We can forget all about it, or you can do whatever you want because I’ve done enough to make things worse.”
You stayed silent, for seconds that felt like hours for Yunho. He prayed inside that you were going to forgive him, that you were going to tell him that it was okay, that you would simply not talk about it ever again and let him feel guilty about this for the rest of his life.
“- It’s okay Mr. Jeong, it was a mistake, it could’ve happened to everyone. And I have some parts to take in this too. But I understand. It was a mistake anyway, it didn’t mean anything.”
It didn’t mean anything. These were the words he unconsciously hoped you wouldn’t pronounce. Because even if he tried to deny it, it meant something to him. It meant so much that he couldn’t stop thinking about it. It meant so much that everytime he sat at his desk, he thought back to the moment he kissed you. It meant so much that even weeks later, he still didn’t forget the taste of your lips, the feeling of having you so close to him. And he craved it. He needed it again.
“- It’s okay if you want to think about it as a mistake.
- Why are you saying that ?
- Because for me it wasn’t.”
His eyes crossed yours, enough for him to see this little spark he noticed before he captured your lips last time. Maybe it wasn’t only a mistake for you either. Maybe he didn’t fuck it all up. Maybe he still had a chance to make this right, if there was any way to make all of this right.
“- It did mean something to me. I… I haven't stopped thinking about it. I can’t focus on anything else other than you.”
It was as if your breath was knocked out of your lungs again. He did that too much lately. But the intensity with which he was staring at you and your lips, and his confession had your heart feeling weak. And surely, you shouldn’t indulge in your fantasy. Surely, you shouldn’t let yourself get seduced by your teacher. But you were already in too deep, and you couldn’t ignore anymore the way he was making you feel.
“- I can’t either. I think… I think you should kiss me again, maybe it’ll help.
- Maybe you’re right.”
Yunho bypassed his desk, and you joined him, throwing yourself in his arms. He cradled your face between his hands, and this time he didn’t hesitate when he put his lips on yours, sighing in relief when the taste of your vanilla chapstick invaded his senses again. And the way you were tugging at his suit jacket to pull him closer to you told him everything he needed to know.
“- Fuck… I missed you so bad Y/N, thought I had messed up everything.”
You stared up at him, now able to see the lust, the desire he had for you going through his brown eyes, and it made your inside flip. You had dreamt about this so much, even if you would’ve rather died than admitted it. But it was true. You were dreaming about having him so close to you, about having him tell you how much he wanted you, about having him just like this.
“- You didn’t, not at all.”
That was all the talking that was made. Because you already talked too much, and even if he loved hearing your soft voice, all Yunho needed right now was to taste you again, to drown himself in your body and your addicting, intoxicating scent. You didn’t stop him when he reached for your thighs to lift you up and drop you on his desk, not caring about the assignments sheets you were sitting on.
You discovered the way his lips against yours felt again, savoured the way his tongue played with yours again. And you loved it just as much as the first time, maybe even more. Because this time, you were truly desperate to feel as much as him as possible. You reached to grab his waist, spreading your legs and bringing him even closer to you. And Yunho complied, because he was just as desperate to finally have you all for himself. He let his hands wander from your back to your thighs, and feeling up your bare skin under his fingers was already driving him crazy.
You tilted your head to the side when Yunho displaced his kisses from the corner of your mouth, to your jawline and then the side of your neck. He was almost devouring you, but you weren’t complaining : it was exactly what you wanted, exactly what you needed. You felt his hands creep up higher, reaching for the hem of your skirt, and his hot breath hitting the now wet skin of your neck.
“- Do you know how bad I wanted to do this every time you walked in my classroom wearing those skirts and these boots ? Do you know how hard it was to not think about doing exactly that whenever you were looking at me ?”
You let out a moan, not really knowing if it was because of what he just told you or because of the fact that he just gave you a hickey. Your heart was beating too fast, adrenaline rushing through your veins as Yunho kissed down your clothed-covered body, making his way to where his hands were still laying. But it was only when he dropped on his knees and pushed your legs apart some more that you realised what he was doing, your words getting stuck in your throat and being replaced by a pathetic whimper when he kissed the inside of your left thigh instead.
“- Is that okay ?
- Y-Yes Mr. Jeong.
- Call me Yunho, will you ?”
You quickly nodded your head, already far too gone because of his feather like touch everywhere except where you needed him the most.
“- Good girl.”
And as if it wasn’t already enough to get another noise out of you, he pushed your skirt higher up your thighs, revealing your soaked panties to his hungry gaze. Immediately, he dived in, licking a strip of your arousal through the material of your underwear. This time, another moan escaped you and it encouraged Yunho to push the piece of clothing to the side and taste your juices for real. The groan he let out against your folds had you shivering ang trying to close your legs around his head. But he was holding them with an iron grip, making it impossible for you to move.
You threw your head back when he sucked on your clit for the first time, one of your hands flying to take a hold of his hair, keeping him just where he was. He ate you out just like he kissed you - hungrily, like a starved man, like it was his last meal. And you were loving it all, trying to keep down your noises because anyone walking by the classroom could hear you and decide to walk in, and you could get in trouble. But the thrill of getting caught was making everything feel so much better.
“- Feeling good, angel ?
- Yes, so good, don’t stop please…”
The nickname had your legs trembling in no time, and the way he was lapping at your cunt had you close to the edge already. You could feel your pussy clenching around nothing as he sucked on your clit again, making more of your juices come out that he didn’t waste any time licking up. The force with which he was holding your thighs open made you wonder if he could use the same strength to put you in all the positions he wished, if he would use the same strength on you to make you unable to move and fuck you until you passed out.
“- Yunho… I’m close…”
He hummed against you, doubling his efforts to bring you to the edge. He didn’t need to do much, because you had been waiting for this for too long, and because he felt too good to resist. As you felt your orgasm wash over you, your hand that wasn’t busy in his hair gripped the first things you could reach - one of the paper scattered on his desk, and you couldn’t even feel guilty about the way you crumpled it between your fingers, the rush of pleasure taking over you so strongly you couldn’t bring yourself to care about anything else.
When you had regained enough consciousness for your legs to support your weight again, Yunho helped you come down off his desk, his hands not leaving your waist even when you were standing in front of him. You smiled when you saw how much you had messed up his hair, as they were going in every direction, and you tried to smother it a little.
“- Let me see you this week-end if you are free. I want us to talk, and I want to take my time with you, make you understand everything you make me feel.”
And you agreed. Of course. But you started to regret it when you found yourself all alone, in the room of the hotel Yunho had sent you the address of. You were aware that you couldn’t just welcome him at your dorm, or go to his apartment either, because there were risks that someone would recognize you. So here you were, waiting for him. Despite what had happened earlier this week, it still felt incredibly wrong to be there, to do what you were about to do. You looked around the room, where nothing felt familiar and everything felt odd, as if you shouldn’t be here. You were almost ready to leave when the door opened and Yunho entered.
He was dressed in a pair of black pants, some sneakers and a beige pullover. His casual outfit clashed with the slightly revealing white dress you were wearing underneath your trench. And you felt ridiculous for thinking that putting on something like this was appropriate, though nothing about this situation was appropriate.
“- I’m sorry, I couldn’t find anywhere to park my car.”
Yunho’s voice broke down the heavy silence hanging in the air, but it didn’t dissipate the strange atmosphere. The room was filled with tension, with unspoken words, with something dangerous and forbidden, but so tempting.
“- It’s okay, I haven’t been here for long.”
The moment was awkward, neither one of you knowing what to do with themselves. You couldn’t tell him that you were about to leave when he arrived. And he couldn't tell you that the real reason he was late was because he hesitated before coming. But all it took was one eye contact, one look a little too insistent at each other for your lips to find themselves once again, as if they knew better than yourselves what you wanted. And suddenly, nothing felt weird anymore, nothing felt wrong anymore, and everything was finally fitting perfectly - from the way he was holding your waist, to the way the skin of his neck felt under your fingertips.
“- I missed you.”
The words he whispered against your lips made you feel everything you’ve been needing without knowing it. And you thought that maybe, this wasn’t such a big mistake. And when Yunho’s hands found their way underneath the skirt of your dress to caress the soft skin of your plush thighs, your brain disconnected, letting your emotions control you instead. You got rid of your trench, the material falling to the ground and soon joined by his jacket. You didn’t resist when he grabbed you by your waist to hold you flush against him and kiss you again, finally letting your hands slip under the hem of his pullover and touching his skin. Once again, the way he was kissing you left you dizzy, unable to think about anything other than him.
“- This dress…
- Do you like it ? Or is it too much ?
- Fuck, no, it’s…”
He took another look at the way the white tissue was hugging all your curves just right, underlining your silhouette and making you look like an angel. And the fact that you dressed up just for him made his hunger for you grow even more. So when he felt the urge to kiss you again, and again, and again, he gave into it, like he had wanted to for so much longer than he thought.
“- It’s perfect, you’re beautiful.”
You wanted to compliment him right back, but he didn’t give you enough time to do so, mingling his tongue with yours instead. And you didn’t complain, because you couldn’t get enough of the taste of his lips, of the way his big hands were guiding you to sit on the bed, of the way he was looking at you. You watched closely as he got on his knees to get you rid of these thigh boots that were driving him crazy. Then, he helped you out of your dress, revealing your white lingerie set.
You thought you would’ve been shy, or embarrassed to let him see you like this. But all you felt right now was desire, and confidence. You smiled when you saw him lick his lips while staring down at your body, and while he wasn’t paying attention, you started to unbuckle his belt. Yunho let you do what you wanted, obeying when you asked him to take off his pullover. When you managed to get rid of his pants, you finally allowed yourself to properly drool over him.
You looked up at him from your sitting position on the bed, while he was still standing in between your legs. It was like crossing his gaze at this precise moment made you realise how real all of this was, and you were hit with the fact that you were really going to fuck with your teacher. But you couldn’t find it in you to fight the feeling anymore. It was too late anyway, you couldn’t go back even if you wanted to.
So you did nothing to stop him when Yunho pushed your shoulders so you would lay on the bed. You did nothing to stop him when he started to kiss your neck and covered the skin in his marks. You did nothing to stop him when his hands began to roam all around your body because he couldn’t choose only one spot to touch and focus on, because he needed all of you.
“- I thought you wanted to talk.”
But with the way your fingers were threading through his hair as he massaged your breast over your bra, you definitely weren’t up to talk either.
“- We’re gonna talk, but after I’ve fucked you.”
He punctuated his sentence by pushing your boobs out of your bra and leaning down to suck on your right nipple. And you couldn’t contradict him when all you were able to do was moan and ask for more. Yunho slowly made his way down to your panties, kissing every part of your exposed skin until he could remember every mole and imperfection of your body. And by the time he took off your underwear, you were already dripping wet and you couldn’t breathe properly anymore.
“- Please Yunho, please don’t tease…
- Why’s that angel ? You need me that bad ?
- Yes, yes I need you, I want you.”
Finally hearing it from you and not from the dreams he was making did it for Yunho as he searched for a condom in his jacket’s pocket, while you were throwing away the last pieces of clothing separating your skin from his. And you couldn’t help admiring him and his tall frame, his sculpted back, the veins in his hands and arms, his abs slightly peaking out. Everything about him, every inch of him was perfect, made by the Gods.
And you couldn’t tear your eyes away from his cock either, following his every movement as he got rid of his boxers and put the condom on. It was big, but just as pretty as him, and you already knew he would fill you up just right. When he was close enough to the bed again, you grabbed his hands, pulling him to lay on top of you and kissing him like it was the last time you could taste his lips.
“- Please Yunho, fuck me…”
And he couldn’t do anything else than do it, sliding right in with how wet you were even if you could still feel the way his cock was stretching you out. But you couldn’t help the moan escaping you when he bottomed out, nor could Yunho stop himself from groaning at how tight you were clenching around him.
“- Feeling so good around me angel, like you were made for me.”
You were ready to answer, but the force with which he thrusted inside of you stopped you from doing so, uttering a strangled noise instead that was quickly replaced by endless whines and moans as Yunho started to fuck into you. It was as if he knew exactly how to make you feel good, as if he already knew your body like the back of his hand. He found his way to your waist again, pinning your hips down to the mattress so he could do what he wanted, fuck you like he had been wanting to for far too long.
You could feel your mind drifting far away as all the tension you accumulated these past weeks left your body, washed away by pleasure and desire, washed away by the way Yunho was looking down at you with hooded eyes, lips parted and letting out the most sinful sounds you’ve ever heard. But you needed to feel him even closer to you, impossibly closer to you. So you wrapped your arms around his neck, bringing him down against you. He reached for your legs, guiding you to bend them more until he could hit this sweet spot that made your head fall back with a cry of his name.
“- I’m not gonna last long angel, been waiting for this for too long.
- Me too, I’m close, please…
- You sound so hot when you’re begging.”
You made sure to remember this piece of information before abandoning yourself to the feeling of his cock hitting all the right spots, and of his skilled fingers teasing your clit, the combination making you clench around him impossibly tight as the wave of your orgasm crashed over you. Your release triggered Yunho as he buried his face in your neck, groaning about how good you felt while filling up the condom with his cum. And the crazy thought of him filling you up instead crossed your mind, and it made the feeling of slight overstimulation even more intense.
You were so out of it that you almost didn’t feel the moment when Yunho got up to throw away the condom. You had purposefully decided to not think about all the consequences that what you just did implied, you just wanted to enjoy this a little longer. So when he came to lay down with you again, you got closer to him immediately, like magnets who couldn’t resist the attraction. His fingers brushing against your cheek encouraged you to turn your head to the side, diving in his hypnotising brown eyes. You stayed like that for a moment, simply looking at each other without saying anything. And as if it was the only thing your bodies knew how to do, you joined your lips again.
This time, it was slower, more sensual. If before you were devouring each other, now you took your time to savour the taste of his lips and tongue, to appreciate the way his hands were gliding on your skin, tracing invisible patterns on your lower back. It felt so much more intimate than what all this should have been, but it was too late, so you might as well fuck it all up completely.
This time, Yunho didn’t rush anything, letting you decide on the pace. He let you do what you wanted when you got on top of him, let you deepen the kiss, he let you caress and discover his body. Your kisses wandered from the corner of his mouth to his jawline, going down to his neck, his collarbone, his pecks, his abs, his v-line, careful not to leave any marks on him. You could hide the single hickey he gave you, but you didn’t want to take any risk. When you reached his inner thighs, his hands had made their way to your head, his fingers tangling between the messy strands of your hair. You looked up at him, the desire pouring from your eyes making his heart beat faster.
“- Can I ?
- Do whatever you want, angel.”
You smiled before you resumed your soft kisses along the skin of his thighs. But this time, you let them go up to his hardening dick. It was even prettier up close - and you’ve never thought you would say that about a dick one day, but you’ve never thought you would fuck with your teacher either. You kissed his length from the tip to the base, before running your tongue along the path you had traced. The action got a gasp out of Yunho, and you could feel him staring down at you as you kitten licked his flushed tip a few times. You wanted to take things slow, to remember this for as long as possible, but you were craving his taste, craving to feel him even more so you just took him into your mouth. He was big to say the least, and you could feel him, heavy on your tongue, stretching your throat as you started to bob your head up and down, stroking with your hands what you couldn’t fit in your mouth.
Yunho watched you intently, mouth slightly open and letting out sighs and grunts because you just felt that good. The sinful vision you offered was enough to make these weeks of mentally torturing himself totally worth it. Maybe he shouldn’t love the way you were making him feel, maybe he shouldn’t love the way you were whining around his shaft, maybe he shouldn’t love the way saliva was spilling out from the corners of your mouth. But he couldn’t care less when he gripped your hair harder and you moaned around his cock, eyes watering and nails digging into the skin of his thighs.
“- Shit angel, you’re taking it so well. You’re so good to me.”
You hummed around him once more, resisting the urge to gag around him, relaxing your throat until you could take all of him in your mouth. You felt Yunho sit up straight, so he could get a better look at the way his cock was sliding in and out of your lips with ease. The sight was truly mesmerising, and he wanted to engrave it in his memory.
“- I want to fuck your throat so bad, angel. Will you let me ?”
The pleased sound you let out after he grazed your scalp a few times let him know how willing you were to do just that. Yunho pulled on your hair roughly, forcing you to take all of him, until your nose was rubbing against his stomach and your hands were desperately pawing at his thighs. His thrusts were slow but hard, just what you wanted, just what you needed.
“- You’re such a good girl Y/N, fuck, you’re going to make me cum. I can do it inside of your pretty mouth, right ?”
You agreed with strangled noises as best as you could with the way he was ruining your throat, but it was enough for Yunho to understand and a few seconds later, he buried himself as deep as he could one last time, cumming down your throat with a loud moan of your name. You did your best to shallow everything, some drops of the sticky substance spilling out. Yunho didn’t waste time picking them up with his fingers, sliding them between your lips instead of his cock, commanding for you to lick them clean, which you gladly did. When he finally let you breathe again, your throat was sore, but you were so wet you could feel your juices sliding down the inside of your thighs.
“- Open your mouth for me angel, yes just like that. Good girl.”
Yunho grabbed you by your throat bringing your face closer to his and kissing you messily. He didn’t care that he just came into your mouth, he didn’t care that he could still feel his own taste on your tongue as you made out with him, on the contrary, it made everything so much more intense, so much better, so much more special.
“- Was it good ?
- It was a perfect angel, you’re perfect.”
His hands slid down from your neck to your ass, guiding you to sit on his lap. His touch made you shiver, your back arching unconsciously.
“- Want me to return the favour angel ?
- Yes please, I want your fingers…”
Yunho pushed you so you would lay down on the bed again, his fingers immediately dipping to your core, brushing lightly against your clit. His fingertips glided with ease against your slit, collecting your juices and spreading them everywhere. And you were hypnotised by the sight, thinking about how well his long fingers would fit perfectly inside of you, how they could reach your sweet spot so easily.
“- You’re so wet, Y/N, you’re dripping on my hand.
- Please, Yunho…”
The way you were begging for him, the way you were calling his name, the way you were grabbing his biceps, trying to entice him in finally pushing his fingers inside of you - everything was driving him crazy, you were driving him crazy, and he was convinced that he didn’t want all of that to ever stop. His gaze was fixed on your face scrunching up with pleasure when he finally put one finger inside of your clenching pussy.
“- Feels good ?
- Yes, so good.
- You want another one ?
- Please…”
Yunho bit his lip when he watched you take his second finger with ease, relishing in your sweet voice moaning at the way he was able to reach so deep without making any efforts. You were being so good, and he didn’t have to do anything for you to do so. You were pleading for him so easily, like it was natural, and that was making him feel even more dizzy with want and desire for you. He started to pump his fingers slowly, the squelching sounds from your wet cunt echoing through the room along with your whimpers for more. His other hand creeped up to your thigh, making sure to keep them open. Pleasure was clouding your mind, but your eyes were unable to leave the sight of the veins bulging in his forearms as he fingered you restlessly, thinking about all the ways he could control you, about all the positions he could put you in if he wanted to.
And when it all started to feel too good, you plopped down against the pillows, not able to hold your own weight anymore from how his fingers were making you feel. Whenever he was curling them against that one spot, your brain turned to mush, and you could only whine and cry for more. You closed your eyes, already feeling close to your relief, but not wanting him to stop.
“- Yunho…
- What do you want, angel ?
- I-I want you to fuck me again, please…”
He didn’t let you have any time to think as he bent down to kiss you again, as a reward for being so good to him, so good for him, so perfect for him.
“- Cum on my fingers first, and I’ll fuck you as many time as you want, okay ?”
You nodded energetically, too turned on to think about anything else that wasn’t him. He let down your thigh to circle your clit, efficiently bringing you to your climax in seconds. Your nails dug into his biceps as the rush was taking over you, clenching around his fingers and moaning so loudly he was certain that the people in the room next to you could hear you scream his name. But he loved it, he was loving all of this a little too much.
But Yunho didn’t ask himself more questions as he got up to find another condom in his pockets. He didn’t dare interrogate why it felt so good when he entered your pussy for the second time. He wasn’t even sure if he wanted to know why hearing you moan his name again and again made his heart beat faster. All he wanted right now was you, all he needed right now was you and your perfect body.
This time, he wanted to feel you, to really feel you. So he purposely slowed down his thrusts, and even when you wrapped your legs around his waist, all he did was to suck another hickey in between your breasts. It was frustrating, but it also felt insanely good, the type of pleasure that made you unable to think, that made you go to another world because it just felt that good. You knew you were babbling incoherently, mewling for him to go faster, but you were already too far gone to care about how desperate you must look.
In the heat of the moment, Yunho didn’t think twice before grabbing your wrists and pinning them down to the mattress, but you only whined and clenched around him tighter as an answer. And that made him lose control, his thrusts becoming more sloppy, without any rhythm, because you just felt that good.
“- Yunho ! I’m gonn- Ah ! Oh my god…
- Cum for me angel, fuck, let me hear you.”
His words pushed you over the edge, the overstimulation from your two previous orgasm making this one feel even more intense and fulfilling. Your moans were high-pitched, but you couldn’t keep your voice down, you couldn’t bring yourself to care about anything else than Yunho, Yunho, Yunho. You could hear him groan as he pulled out, throwing the condom away to pump himself on top of you. He only needed a few seconds to cum on your chest, the white fluid soon covering them and even that felt good.
You felt so out of your own body that you almost didn’t register when Yunho grabbed some tissues to clean your skin. But the ringtone of your phone was like a brutal reminder that this was only a little bubble that couldn’t last forever. You got up from the bed to answer your phone, Dajeong on the other line reminding you of a gathering with some of your friends that you had completely forgotten, too focused on Yunho and what you just did. As soon as you hung up, you started to put your clothes back on. The awkward silence from before was coming back, but you didn’t want to end it like that. You wished you could’ve stayed with him a little longer, but you had to be realistic : you weren’t his girlfriend and you’ll never be. But when he grabbed your arm and kissed you passionately while you were fully dressed up and he was only wearing his underwear, it felt exactly like that.
“- Text me later, okay ? I still want us to talk.”
This was becoming too serious for you and you could feel your heart beating too fast for your liking when he cradled your face in his hands to force you to meet his eyes.
“- So you want to see me again ?
- How could I not ?”
You simply smiled and kissed him again before you left. Your legs were still weak, and when you looked at your reflections in the mirror of the elevator, it was like what you did was written all over your face - in your smudged lipstick and your ruffled hair. But it felt too good, and you were already addicted. You knew it would not be easy to stop, but you preferred to pretend that it could last forever for now.
You were afraid that everything would feel weird, that you wouldn’t even dare to look at him, or that maybe he would be the one putting an end to all of this. But he didn’t. And the way he was looking at you during his classes could only mean that he craved you just as much as you craved him. And stealing glances at each other was basically all you were able to do for the whole week, because you had a ton of assignments to work on, and because he had too much work. Both of you agreed through text that it was too risky to do anything on the campus, that nothing should happen again in his office.
However, that didn’t stop your mind from coming back to when he ate you out on his desk, or to him fucking you, or to the way his cock was feeling so heavy on your tongue. And that didn’t stop Yunho from thinking back to your plush thighs clenching around his head, or to your taste, or the way you were screaming his name when he was hitting the right spot. Every night when you came back from your classes, you laid down on your bed, trying to make the aching in your core go away, but the only thing that could satisfy you was him, and you knew it.
Your frustration reached its peak on Friday when Lola cancelled your night out because she had to work early the next morning. You knew it wasn’t her fault, that it was her colleague for calling in sick just so she could go see her boyfriend, but it still annoyed you, and it was the cherry on top. This whole week would have been stressing enough, but the fact that Yunho made eye contact with you whenever he could, and that he purposefully brushed his fingers against yours every time he handed you some documents added to your irritation.
You didn’t think twice when you sent him a text, asking him to join you to the hotel because you needed him badly. You didn’t feel ashamed of how desperate and needy you were, because you were too horny to care about the fact that you shouldn’t miss him so much after only one week of not seeing each other. And maybe Yunho should have resisted more but he longed for you, he had wanted you all week and he couldn’t contain his desire anymore.
This time, he didn’t even greet you when he entered the hotel room, going straight for your lips and taking control of the kiss, devouring your mouth as if you were his oxygen. Maybe you should've talked before doing this again, but lust was clouding his and your mind, none of you thinking about anything else than releasing the tension.
Soon enough, the floor was covered in your clothes as Yunho manhandled you on your knees, ass up and face down in the pillows, two of his fingers already buried deep inside of you. If last time, he wanted to take his time, today he just needed to ruin you, to break you down, to see you cry for him. And that was exactly what you wanted him to do, what you needed him to do to you. Your brain had already been disconnected, the words coming out of your mouth against your will.
“- Please Yunho fuck me, please wanna feel you raw, want you to fill me up, please…”
His fingers stilled inside of you for a few seconds, almost making you cry out at the loss of stimulation. What you were asking him to do was crazy, it was not safe, but the way his dick throbbed made all the thinking for him - he wanted that, he dreamt about that.
“- Are you sure about that angel ?
- Yes, please ! I’m on the pill, I’ll take a plan B, but please I need you, please…”
It was still dangerous, it was still nonsense, but Yunho wasn’t thinking with his brain anymore, nothing logical was crossing his mind anymore.
“- Fuck, you’re going to kill me Y/N.”
But he loved it, and he loved how tight you felt around him when he pushed his cock inside, loved how he could feel you even better like that, loved how pliant you were in his hold. He gripped your waist as he bottomed out, forcing you to stay still and all you could do was moan out his name like a prayer, because you could feel everything, because it felt even more intense like that, because his strength excited you. And Yunho didn’t hesitate when he started to pound into you, the feeling of your bare cunt around his dick making him delirious. You arched your back more, trying to fuck yourself against his cock because you always wanted more, you always craved more.
“- You’re such a slut, angel. Fuck ! You’re letting me fuck you raw but you get shy when I look at you, uh ? You’re so fucking naughty.”
You adored it when he called you his good girl, but the way he was holding the back of your neck to keep your head buried in the pillow, and the way he was ruining you felt just as good. The adrenaline rushing in your veins had you getting closer to the edge so quickly, but you didn’t want him to stop. You were unable to say anything else than his name, choking on your words, mewling from the tip of his cock kissing your cervix.
And Yunho wanted to talk dirty to you, to whisper all the things he knew you loved in your ears, but his mind was clouded with want, and he couldn’t think straight. All he wanted was to spill his load inside of you, do the things he imagined when he was alone, these things he forbade himself to think about. But now he could, and he never felt better than buried deep inside your tight cunt.
“- Gonna cum inside of you, okay ? Gonna fill you up like the slut you are, angel.
- Please !”
The moan he let out when he stilled inside of you was so erotic you could’ve come only listening to his voice, but the feeling of his cum painting your insides white was what made it for you, your body growing limp in his hold. His grip on your neck and hips tightened, maybe enough to leave you with some marks but you didn’t care. Both of you had trouble coming down, but when you were finally able to, Yunho helped you lay down with him, your head resting on his chest as you were still trying to catch your breath. You felt his fingers brushing your hair away from your face and you looked up at him, your heart skipping a beat when your gaze crossed.
“- I wasn’t too rough, right ?
- No, it was perfect, I loved it.”
You smiled at each other, and even if it felt too intimate, and even if it was what couples did and not whatever the two of you were, he leaned down to kiss your lips softly.
“- I loved it too. I think I just want to keep spending a good time with you, I don't want things to get more complicated than they already are, if that’s okay with you. Let’s keep it as simple as possible, yeah ?
- Yeah, I’d like that.”
You were the one to kiss him this time, as if you wanted to seal your agreement, as if it was a silent promise.
“- Where are we going ?
- It’s a surprise. You can choose the music if you want.”
You didn’t waste any time going through Yunho’s playlist, teasing him about some songs you didn’t think he would listen to and finally settling on a Lana del Ray song. It had been a week since you decided to just do what felt right and not think too much, and he had asked you if you were free to spend your Saturday with him. Of course, you said yes, but you didn’t think that he would pick you up in his car and drive you somewhere, thinking he just wanted to change from the hotel you were always meeting up and show you another place, but it felt like he was literally taking you on a date.
You watched the landscape unfold through the car window, casually chatting with Yunho about how your week went, about what you ate yesterday, about which book you read lately. Sometimes, you thought that the age difference between the two of you would make things awkward, or that it would clash with your opinions. But it was the exact opposite. Your conversations felt natural, as if you had known each other for decades, as if eight years weren’t separating you. You were twenty-two, you were an adult and you could make your own choices, but sometimes, you were worried about the way he was perceiving you.
“- Y/N ? We’re almost there.”
You looked down at your phone, seeing that it had in fact been over an hour since he had picked you up and you apparently fell asleep. You yawned as you checked your makeup and hairstyle in the mirror of the sun visor, glad to see that your little nap hadn’t messed up anything. When Yunho stopped the car, you were in a narrow street, where not many stores could be seen. You were about to get out when he asked you to wait, getting out himself and making his way over to the passenger door, opening it for you and offering you his hand to help you out. And smiled up at him as you got out of his car.
“- You’re such a gentleman.
- For you ? Always.”
His cheeky smile made you giggle, but the fact that he didn’t let go of your hand as he walked you to one of the few shops on the street made your heart skip a beat. He did nastier things to you, said words that would have made anyone feel embarrassed, but for some reason, this small gesture dusted your cheeks in a pink tone that wasn’t due to your excessive use of blush.
“- I really wanted to show you this place, I think you’re gonna love it.”
He held the door for you, a little bell ringing as you entered a cute, little bookshop. The smell of old pages invaded your nostrils as Yunho guided you through the shelves with a hand on the small of your back. You couldn’t help looking all around, stunned by how much books were in there, by how many you recognized the titles of. The atmosphere of the whole boutique was welcoming and warm, the sunlight reflecting through the coloured glass of the front window displaying moving shadows everywhere and adding to its charm.
“- You like it ?”
You turned to him with a big smile on your face, almost ready to squeal with excitement.
“- Of course I like it ! If I could spend my life there I would !
- No one’s stopping you angel.”
A big smile spread on his face as he kissed your forehead and let you wander around, eyes opening wide every time you saw a title you recognized. You were fitting perfectly in the setting with the black bow in your hair, your little brown skirt and your white turtleneck. Yunho was so lost in his contemplation that he almost didn’t hear the lady holding the shop coming out of the stocking room.
“- Yunho ! It’s been a while since I’ve seen you there !
- Yeah Mrs. McMillan, I’m sorry I’ve been quite busy.”
The old lady shook her head, her long, white hair flying around as she did so.
“- I’ve already told you to call me Isabel, honey, I’m not that old ! And you brought a pretty girl along this time.”
Yunho turned back to you, watching you fondly as you piled up books in your arms, and soon enough the stack would be higher than you.
“- Is that love I’m seeing in your eyes ?
- No, not at all, she’s only a friend.”
Putting that label on you made his heart ache, because he knew you were so much more than that, and Isabel seemed to know it as well because she looked at him with a gaze filled with disapproval as you came to the counter, still smiling.
“- Y/N, this is Isabel McMillan, she has been selling books here since I’ve been alive.
- Nice to meet you Mrs. McMillan ! I have to say that this shop might become my new favourite place, there’s so many things there, it’s incredible !”
Your excitement was contagious as a smile took over the old woman's features too, softening at having someone as passionate as you to compliment her.
“- Don’t take on your friend’s bad habits, call me Isabel, sweetheart. I’m glad you’re enjoying my hard work.
- I really do. If I could, I would buy half of these books but sadly I cannot.”
As Isabel noted down the title of the books you wanted to buy - because she didn’t want to use technology, saying it was too tiring to learn these things at her advanced age - Yunho couldn’t detach his eyes from you.
“- Since you’re with Yunho, and because I’m starting to like you, young lady, I’m going to offer you a little reduction. It’s rare to see people being so dedicated to literature these days, it will not do any harm to my business to encourage you to come again.
- Thank you so much ! But I’m gonna tell you a secret : I would’ve come back, even without that.”
The old lady laughed out loud, along with you and Yunho joined the two of you, because your good mood was infectious.
“- Do you still have the book I asked you to put away last time ?
- Of course, honey, I’m a woman of words.”
She crouched down behind the counter and came up with a book she handed him.
“- I’ll pay for it, and all the ones Y/N is taking.
- What ? No, Yunho this is almost fifty euros, it’s too much.
- Can’t I spoil you ? It’s my pleasure angel, I wanna do this for you so let me, okay ?”
The nickname had you unable to hold eye contact with him much longer, and you folded, letting him pay for your books, with butterflies coming alive in your stomach as he held the door for you again on your way out. And Isabel watched all this happen, and she couldn’t help scolding Yunho in his head for being so blind about his own feelings, for being so blind to the way you were looking at him with heart eyes. But after all, it was none of her business.
“- Put the books in my car, then we can go grab a coffee if you want.
- I’d like that, yeah ! And thank you for the books, you didn’t have to.
- Yes, but I wanted to. Stop worrying about that okay ?”
You nodded as you reached his car and you dropped the books on his back seat. But before you could close the door, he handed you the book he took for himself.
“- This one is also for you. I saw it last time and thought that you might like it. Maybe you could read it while I’m reading one of yours, and when we’re done, we could hand it back with annotations and talk about it. What do you think ?”
When you looked up at him, he looked anxious, maybe because he thought that you wouldn’t like his idea. But you did, the simple fact that he thought about you when seeing this book made you feel dizzy.
“- I think I love this idea. Wait a minute.”
You turned around, rummaging through all your new books in search of the one you saw and that you bought for the sole reason that it reminded you of him.
“- I picked up this one thinking about you, actually, so you might read it as well.”
You handed him the book, and he took it gladly as you grabbed the one he picked up for you too. You finally closed the car door and you both headed downtown to find a coffee shop. The first time your hand brushed against his, you didn’t dare to take it. And the second time, he didn’t dare to do it. So the third time, you took a deep breath and intertwined your fingers with his, and he gave your hand a little squeeze, both of you wearing a bright smile on your faces.
The coffee shop you found was surprisingly pretty empty considering it was a Saturday evening, but you were glad there were not that many people. When you approached the counter, you were ready to recite your favourite coffee order when Yunho took the lead and listed down your usual as if it was written in his mind. You couldn’t even listen to the rest of the things he said to the cashier, focused on why he knew that when you never told him. He must’ve noticed you blankly staring at him, because he turned to you with a little smirk.
“- What ? You’re surprised I know this ?
- Yes, a little. How did you figure it out ?
- Well, you always come to my classes with the same thing, it was not difficult to notice.”
You rolled your eyes, mainly to hide how flustered the information made you feel.
“- You’re so obsessed with me.”
As the cashier put your orders down on the counter and announced the price of your drinks, Yunho mouthed “Yes” to you as he paid again for the both of you without letting you enough time to even reach for your purse. And before you could even start to protest, he effectively shut you up by kissing your cheek and dragging you along with him to find an isolated table where you both sat down. As always, the conversation flooded naturally, and you were not thinking about anything displeasing - in this instant, you were truly happy.
And Yunho was happy too. So when you proposed to play a card game, and that the winner could ask the loser a question about anything, he agreed, even if it was silly, it was okay because it was you. You asked him what his favourite colour was, why he wanted to become a teacher, what he would say to Oscar Wilde if he could talk to him. And he asked you which Austen novel was your favourite, why you wanted to study literature, what your biggest dream was. You were so immersed in your little game that the staff of the coffee shop had to ask you to leave because they were closing the place, and the sky was indeed darker as you got out to walk back to his car.
He opened the door for you again, and as you watched him make his way to the driver seat, you couldn’t help asking yourself if that was really all he wanted from this afternoon. After all, even if you didn’t put a label on your relationship - if you could even call it that - you knew deep down that the main reason he was seeing you was sex. And if he didn’t plan on having sex with you now, does this mean that this meeting you didn’t dare call a date was only that ? But then, it took you down a rabbit hole of never ending questions that you didn’t want to dig into.
Sensing that your mood was a little down, Yunho didn’t dare to talk too much and disturb you, even if he didn’t understand why. You had a good time, you couldn’t stop smiling and you really seemed to enjoy hanging out with him. And the thought that you could be questioning yourself about your situationship made him a little nervous, though it shouldn’t because this was what it was - a situationship. And it didn’t matter if you made his heart beat faster everytime he saw you. And it didn’t matter if you made him feel alive for the first time in years. It didn’t matter because having more with you was simply impossible. When Yunho parked in front of your dorm, all the serotonin from this day had been washed away with the doubts filling him up.
“- Thank you for everything Yunho, I had a great time.”
But your smile seemed fake, it didn’t reach your eyes as it usually did. And Yunho felt his heart clench painfully. He didn’t want you to feel sad with him. Never. You were supposed to enjoy his company as much as he enjoyed yours.
“- Are you really alright ? If I overstepped, tell me, please. I don’t want you to keep these things from me Y/N.”
You sighed as you turned your gaze away from him, but his hands on either side of your face forced you to look him in the eyes again. Why did he have to be so perfect all the time ? It would’ve made things so much easier if he didn’t care about you.
“- You did nothing wrong, I’m just thinking too much.
- About what ?
- I just think we should be more careful if we start going out like that because someone could recognize us. And you could lose your job, or I could get kicked out. I’m probably just being paranoid but…”
That was not the problem, but you didn’t want to talk about the real reason you were feeling so melancholic. Because it would probably ruin everything, and you needed him too much for your own good, you needed him too much to risk losing him.
“- You’re not being crazy, okay ? I understand, and if you’re afraid we might meet someone we know, we can go somewhere else next time, anywhere you wanna go, i’ll take you. How does that sound ?
- Good. It sounds good.
- Then we’ll be doing that.”
You nodded, and even if you still felt a little bad, one look from him was enough to make you feel better, to make your worries all go away. So even if your heart was screaming for you not to, you let him kiss your forehead, and then your lips, so softly it made you weak in the knees. But it felt too good to ask him to stop. So you didn’t, and you just kissed him back until you were out of breath.
“- I’m gonna go, I have to work on your assignment because fucking the teacher won’t get me a free pass, right ?
- That’s the spirit angel, I’m always expecting the best from you.
- Then I have to start now. Be careful on the road, Yu.”
He nodded and watched you get out of his car, not leaving until he saw you get inside the building of your dorm. And then only did he authorise himself to let out a sigh. Because you were too sweet to be true, because you gave him a little nickname that had him feeling much more things than he shouldn’t, because your scent was still lingering everywhere and it was driving him crazy. You were driving him crazy, to be honest.
And it was bad, really bad. Yunho didn't mean for things to go this far, but he felt like he couldn’t stop now. And if he was honest with himself, he didn’t want to stop now that he had a taste of you. However, it still felt incredibly wrong to go home to his girlfriend when he had spent the day with you and that he didn’t think about her only once. The smell of home cooked food hit him as soon as he stepped inside, and the weight on his shoulders even more heavy as he announced that he was home.
“- You’re coming back late, baby ! But that’s okay, at least everything is ready for dinner, I made your favourite !”
Guiltiness was creeping up inside of him with every word she said, and everything sounded so fake when he served her his lie about having an important meeting with his colleagues. She didn’t deserve this, she didn’t do anything for him to stop loving her. On the contrary, Hana was always sweet and caring, she was there for him and had been for years. But maybe it was the problem. Maybe it has been too long. But Yunho perfectly knew the real reason, it was just too painful to admit it, and it would make things too real.
For a while, he preferred to ignore the fact that you were making the flames come alive again in his heart. He preferred to ignore how much stronger his feelings for you were than for his girlfriend he was supposed to love and cherish and marry soon. But was it really a crime when everything she was doing, everything they were doing seemed faked, forced, done out of habit rather than because of true love and affection ? Yunho knew that he was already in too deep with you to stop, and the way Hana was not paying attention to what he was saying was making him feel a little less remorseful about the way he was only seeing your face when she was kissing him good night.
Work and classes have been hectic for the both of you these past weeks, so Yunho’s proposal of a getaway trip to the beach this weekend felt like a bubble of oxygen. Sure, you had seen each other, but for never more than a quickie. Sure, you didn’t stop sending each other texts and photos to keep up with your days, but you wanted to hear him calling you angel again. And even if it was supposed to be only that, even if you shouldn’t want that, you still missed spending time with him, talking with him. So you held on to the promise of this little break with him to finally breathe and relax.
When you finally spotted his car parked a few streets away from your dorm, and his tall frame leaning against the drivers’ door, the wind blowing his perfectly styled hair, your heart started to beat faster. The rush you got everytime you laid your eyes on him never flattered. And you didn’t really think about it when you ran to him and threw yourself in his arms. You could hear him chuckling as he buried his face into your neck, holding you closer to him and spinning you around. Both of you needed this hug, and Yunho couldn’t ever get tired of your addicting scent, breathing you in for a moment before he cradled your face into his hands to kiss you like he had wanted to these past few days.
“- I missed you, angel.
- We literally saw each other yesterday.
- But not like that.”
This comment was enough to make heat rise into your body again. But you simply slapped his chest playfully as he giggled like an idiot. But he didn’t mind your teasing, it was entertaining. Like the gentlemen he always was, Yunho opened the door of the car for you. Every time he drove you somewhere, you felt like a passenger princess - getting to choose the music, opening the windows whenever you wanted, holding his hand when he didn’t need it. The weather was starting to warm up a little, and you smiled as you felt the pleasant air hit your face, making your hair fly in every direction.
And yes, Yunho felt a little guilty for cancelling plans he had with his girlfriend to take you to the beach, but he needed it. He needed to escape from his life and his routine for just one day, but more importantly, he needed you. He didn’t want to spend his weekend with her family, he wanted to spend it with you. And as he watched you run towards the water, squealing as the cold liquid touched your bare feets, he felt like it was worth it. Your long skirt was floating around you to the rhythm of the wind, and to him, you’ve never looked more beautiful than right now - with your hair all messy, and the brightest smile he’s ever seen on your face directed at him, asking him to come with you.
There were only a few other people on the beach, allowing you to be as affectionate as you wished. The picnic both of you had prepared was spent between sweet kisses and mindless conversation. And then, Yunho laid down to rest his head on your lap while you read another book he had given to you. You mindlessly started to run your hands through his hair, smiling lightly when he released a satisfied sigh, relaxing even more. And Yunho swore he could’ve fallen asleep just like that - with the sun warming up his body and your presence warming up his heart.
“- It’s been so long since I’ve last gone to the beach…”
Your self-reflection steered Yunho out of his slumber, looking up at you to find you entirely focused on the landscape in front of your eyes. Suddenly, your tone was a lot more nostalgic, and he couldn’t help his curiosity. Because yes, he knew your body like the back of his hands by now, and he knew what you were liken but he knew so little about your past, about you - the you he was starting to fall in love with.
“- But you grew up close to the ocean, right ?
- Yeah. We used to go every weekend, it was always the best day of the week and I was so excited to go every time. But when my parents started to fight, we stopped going. Apparently, it reminded them of too many memories and they had no time to do that anymore. I tried to go alone once. I was maybe eight ? I don’t remember well, but I know that I got scolded so badly I’ve never tried it again, even as a teenager. And I kinda had an apprehension to go see the ocean again.
- I didn’t know that. I’m sorry for proposing that, we can leave whenever you want if you don’t feel comfortable, angel.”
Your eyes finally came back to him, smiling softly at him as you pushed a strand of his hair away from his forehead, your touch making goosebumps come alive on his skin.
“- It’s okay, I’m over all that now. And when I think back about it, these trips were never perfect. My parents were already fighting back then, I was just too young to understand what it meant. But today I’m here with you, so I knew it would be nothing like that. You make everything better, Yu.”
You leaned forward, pecking his lips for a second or two, but it was enough to make Yunho smile again. He had no idea your childhood could’ve been so chaotic, and from what you told him, he could easily imagine the classic scheme through which you went. And it made sense with the women you were today - strong, independent and determined. But he also learned that you needed him to baby you sometimes, and he was always willing to let you fall into his open arms every time you needed to. And the fact that you were slowly opening up more and more to him everyday felt like a reward.
“- What was your childhood like ?
- Well, I have a pretty conservative and religious family, and I’ve always felt like I’ve never belonged with them. My parents love me, I know they do, but it’s like I don’t fit in with them, you know ? It’s a strange feeling, but I’ve always been the rebel one : I didn’t do the studies my parents wanted me to do, and I didn’t follow every one of their rules as I grew up, and I’ve never had the same faith as them. I think that’s what disturbed them the most.
- The feeling of being a disappointment, and of going against the flow is never easy to deal with, especially as a kid. But look where you are now. They should be proud of you for doing a job you love. At least, I’m proud of you.”
This time, Yunho made the first move to kiss you.
“You’re really an angel, too good to be true.
- I could say the same about you.”
Because he simply had that aura that made you feel safe, that made you feel comfortable, that made you feel at home. Every time you looked into his eyes, it was as if nothing else existed, as if he was the only thing that was real. But you didn’t want to think about it, didn’t want to dwell on what it meant, didn’t want to think about the fact that this won’t last forever. Instead, you kept on talking, telling each other some childhood memories. And it all felt so peaceful, like you were all alone, like it was both of you against the rest of the world, like you were in a little bubble that could never burst.
And Yunho really wished he could stay like that with you forever, but the sun was starting to go down and the wind was turning colder. You could’ve fallen asleep on the ride home, lulled by the way he was quietly humming to the songs of the playlist you choose. This day made you forget about everything else, made the stress go away, made all your worries disappear. But you knew it was not only because you got away, but mostly because Yunho was with you. He always had that effect on you, no matter how hard you tried to resist it. You didn’t want this day to end, you didn’t want this feeling to ever go away. So as he parked near your dorm, you kissed his lips one more time.
“- Do you want to come up ? My roommate is not here.
- What about being careful, angel ? Anyone could recognize me here.
- It’s Sunday, everyone is either locked up in their rooms working or spending the day out. No one will see you. Please ?”
The fact that you started to kiss down his neck as well as your pleading eyes were close to breaking Yunho’s resolve. He knew he shouldn’t let you have this much of an effect on him, but you had that effect and he couldn’t deny the way he weakly said “yes” and let you drag him to your dorm room. But the way you were giggling against his lips as you pushed him to sit down on your bed made him forget all about his doubts. As you dropped to your knees on the ground, settling between his legs, Yunho couldn’t help the shaky breath that escaped him.
“- I think I have to pay you back for today, don’t I ?”
The smirk playing on your lips as you unbuckled his belt and helped him get out of his pants did nothing to calm his heartbeat down. And the way you were always so eager to take care of him, to have your mouth on him, did nothing to help either. But it felt too good, so he didn’t stop you and let you kiss his tip one time before you started to kitten-lick his cock.
“- Fuck, don’t tease, angel.
- But you look so pretty like that.”
Your pouty lips made him want to spoil you but also to be a little mean. But you were such a good girl for him, taking all of him in your mouth. Everytime you were getting down on your knees for him, Yunho couldn’t help the rush of adrenaline going through his veins. He threw his head back when he felt your cheeks hollowing, sucking him in deeper. He wanted to stay like that forever, with you drooling around his cock, and his hands buried in your hair. But he needed to have his mouth on you too, to make you feel good. So he took advantage of your size difference to throw you on the bed with ease, pushing up your long skirt so he could dip his head under the material and lick a strip of your wet cunt through your panties.
“- Yunho… Please, don’t tease.
- But you look so pretty like that.”
You smiled as you lightly slapped his shoulder, eliciting a few chuckles from him before he helped you get out of your underwear and finally got a taste of your cunt. You could only see the top of his head, but the way he was subtly nibbling on your clit had you closing your eyes to appreciate the moment even more. His tongue lapping at your cunt was sending you to places you’ve never been, and you couldn’t care less about the other people at the dorm who might hear you whining his name loudly. This day was so perfect, Yunho was so perfect. You couldn’t ask for more. Or you could, but you would be pushing your luck, and you didn’t want anything else if it meant you could be with him in some way. But you didn’t want to think about all that right now, so you pushed his head further in between your thighs.
“- Don’t stop, please…”
Yunho groaned against your folds, doubling his efforts to bring you to the edge, practically making out with your pussy at this point. But you didn’t mind, not at all. You wanted him, wanted every little part of his body and soul to be yours. As you felt your orgasm approaching, you started to grind against his face, moaning at the way his nose was bumping against your clit every time you rocked your hips. And when you came with a cry of pleasure, Yunho made sure to hold your thighs open for him to eat you until he had gulped down the last drop of your juices.
“- How do you taste better every time ? I’ll never get tired of it.
- Good. Because I don't want you to stop.”
Both of you were still half clothed, but you didn’t mind it as Yunho came up to kiss your lips, his tongue finding yours easily and his hands grabbing your breast over your top like a second nature. Everything felt so familiar, so right, like you were where you should be. Your lips were sealed to his, from the moment he pulled out his condom to the moment his cock entered you, only separating for a brief instant when you moaned in harmony.
And no words where needed as he made love to you. Because there was no other way to define how he was fucking you, to define the tenderness of his touch, the fondness of his gaze, the softness of his breath hitting your skin. Every sound he elicited from you was immediately drowned in his mouth, your hands tugging at the material of his shirt as you felt close to the edge again. You felt full of so many emotions you couldn’t even name them all, but you knew that Yunho was the only reason you were feeling all that.
“- I’m close…
- Me too, angel…”
The words you’ve been meaning to say for some time almost slipped past your lips as you felt the rush of pleasure course through your body. And if Yunho hadn’t nuzzled his head into your neck, he would’ve probably been about to say them too. As you came down of your little paradise where nothing existed except for him, you realised how close you’ve been to fuck it all up. And you didn’t want that - you were going to take everything you could have from this relationship, and no matter the state you would end up in, it would be worth it because it was him.
“- Hey ! Watch where you’re going Y/N !”
Dajeong kept you from walking straight into the door that opened just in front of your face. You sheepishly thanked her, and tried to not get lost in your thoughts again.
“- You seem absent since yesterday. Did something happen this weekend ?”
You knew exactly why you were so absorbed, you knew it. But you couldn’t say it, you couldn’t talk about it with her. It would mean putting Yunho in a dangerous situation, and yourself too. And what would she think of you ? You were always the first one to comment on how stupid all the girls crushing on your teacher were, and now you were the one who ended up in his bed every time he needed you.
“- It’s nothing, I just… Don’t know what to do about something and I’m thinking about it a little too much.”
Your eyes travelled from your friend by your side to Yunho’s silhouette. He was standing near the door of his office, having a lively conversation with a woman you’ve never seen before but you supposed that she was one of his colleagues. You had no right to be jealous. And you weren’t. Not really, at least. You were not jealous about seeing him with someone else, you were mentally prepared for that to happen. But you were jealous of how good she looked beside him, thinking about how ridiculous you must be whenever you were going out with him. Your age difference was visible, and everything felt much more right when he was with someone his age. But you quickly averted your gaze from them, not seeing the pained look on Yunho’s face as he turned his head your way.
“- You wanna talk about it tonight ?
- I don’t know, it’s complicated.”
Dajeong smiled at you and grabbed you by your arm, trying to cheer you up a little. She didn’t like to see you down - you were always so energetic and joyful, it felt odd whenever you were like that.
“- No matter what you decide, I’m here. And I’m keeping you home for a movie night anyway.
- I'd like that a lot. Thank you.
- I told you, I’m here for you.”
You thanked her again and tried not to think about Yunho for the rest of the day. You weren’t even mad at him, except the fact that you had no right feeling like that, it was mostly because you realised that you really couldn’t be with him for more than what you already were. And it hurt more than you think it would have, because even if you tried to stop yourself from daydreaming about a future with him, you still did, and you had started to believe that it could happen, that it could be true. But you had to be sensible and remind yourself that it was impossible, that even if there was the slightest chance that he loved you, he could never do it in the open, and you were not ready to stay a secret your whole life. But you still went to his office after your classes because he had asked you to. When you entered the room, Yunho was waiting for you, anxiously chewing on his nails. He gestured for you to close the door behind you and when you made sure it was locked, you took his hands in yours, confusion lingering in your eyes.
“- What is it Yu ? Are you alright ?
- I should be the one asking you that.
- Why ?
- Because of what you saw this morning. It’s not what you think, I swear there’s nothing between us, she’s just another teacher I’m working with. I’m not doing any-
- Stop.”
And he did it, mouth closing shut as you tried to not let all the doubts and the melancholy that invaded you today be perceived in your voice or your touch. You stood on your tippy toes to kiss his lips softly, hoping that it would calm him down a little.
“- I didn’t think anything about it, okay ? I’m not mad, or sad, or anything else. And you can do absolutely what you want, you know, it’s not like I’m your girlfriend or anything. I don’t have a word to say about your relationships.”
The words hurt you, but they hurt him too. He knew you weren’t his girlfriend, he made that clear enough so you understood that nothing like that could ever happen. But it still felt wrong to hear you say that, he still felt bad at seeing the slight discomfort in your eyes. However, you didn’t let him reflect on that too much as you let go of his hands.
“- Don’t worry about that, okay ? I have to go, I have plans with Dajeong for tonight but text me if you need anything.
- Yeah, have a good night angel.”
You smiled at him before leaving and Yunho’s heart clenched when he saw you go out one more time. Every night you spent together, you had always left before him, and every time, he wished you could stay a little more. And every time, he prayed that it would not be the last time he was going to see you. Even if everything about this was wrong, he didn’t want it to end, and for once, he wanted to be selfish. He wanted to think about himself, to put his happiness first and not everyone else’s opinions.
That’s why when you told him you had a really bad day, a few weeks after this incident, he decided to think about what made him happier lately and put you first. So he picked you up after class, without telling you where you were going, but it had become a habit of his to never reveal the destination of your little adventures. The ride was silent, the music being the only sound disturbing the quiet atmosphere, but as soon as Yunho parked on the hill that overlooked the whole city so you could see the sunset, you bursted into tears. Yunho pulled you into his lap, running his hands through your hair to calm you down, and encouraging you to talk to him.
“- Tell me what’s going on, angel.
- I’m just… Everything I do, it’s never enough. There’s always someone who’s doing it better, there’s always someone to remind me that I’m enough. I’m never enough, for anything or anyone.”
Seeing you like that broke his heart, but Yunho didn’t let his own emotions overpower him. He cradled your face in his hands, whipping your tears away tenderly.
“- You are enough Y/N, you’ve always been enough and the way you’re feeling right now does not reflect what you really are. You’re doing so much all the time, and for everyone. I promise you are enough, angel. And I’m proud of the person you are, I’m proud of you.”
You nuzzled your head in his chest, a little more serene than five minutes before, his scent soothing your heart and your mind, and his touch so soft and delicate you could’ve fallen asleep in his arms. You stayed like that for a moment, not needing to say anything else as his presence was enough to get you to relax, and you couldn’t say if you spent ten minutes or an hour like that, but you felt so peaceful you didn’t want to move. Whenever you were with him, it was like a little bubble engulfed the two of you, and that nothing else existed beside him and everything he was making you feel.
“- Thank you, Yu.”
And you pecked his lips to reinforce that idea. And Yunho pushed away a strand of your hair before he kissed you too, deepening it when you whimpered against his mouth and wrapped your arms around his neck to keep him closer to you. And you stayed there, simply making out and quietly talking about nothing and everything. But it was enough to calm you down. And it was enough for Yunho to be sure about what he wanted to do. But not now. Not when you were so vulnerable he felt like you could break in his arms.
“- Can you take me home ? I’m tired.
- Of course, angel. I just need to stop by the gas station.”
You nodded and kissed him one last time before getting back in your seat. Your mood was much better on the way back, casually chatting with Yunho as he drove you home with his hand comfortably resting on your thigh. You mindlessly played with his fingers, not really paying attention to the road. You only registered the notifications noises from his phone when he was out and paying for his gas. You glanced at his illuminated screen, not really wanting to know who was texting him but just out of habit, and the nickname of the person texting him was all you needed to know. “My girl 💕” was enough to understand that you weren’t the only one, that he wasn’t as invested in this relationship as you. You were aware of all these things, but to be hit by the realisation, to be faced with the truth was harsh. When he sat back down in his seat, you had to brace yourself so the tears wouldn’t spill from your eyes, so the words you were about to scream at his face wouldn’t slip out from your mouth.
“- Are you alright, angel ?
- Hum, yeah, I just wanna go home and sleep. Don't worry.”
You offered him a little smile and he caressed your cheek, but you had to mentally restrain yourself from pushing his hand away. You let him drive you home, forcing yourself to smile and seem normal and composed. Only when you were snuggled underneath your blankets did you allow yourself to let the tears fall freely from your eyes. You were expecting this to stop at some point, but not like that. You were trusting him, you thought he was telling you the truth, you thought that what would separate you would only be the fact that it was impossible, but not that.
It was so unlike him, always so kind and gentle, always thinking about you and your comfort first. That was surely why you never thought he would do something like that. But after all, you should've seen it coming. This was truly too good to be true, too perfect to last. But you would've wanted it to last for a little longer, for forever. And coming back to reality was hard, it was like waking up from a dream to realise you were only living in a nightmare all this time. That night, you fell asleep with his scent still lingering on your clothes, and dried tears covering your cheeks.
The next morning, you weren’t doing any better, if not worse. The truth was sinking in, and you were not strong enough to answer his texts yet, leaving him on read and purposely ignoring his demand to see you today. You got up from your bed either way, only because you needed to eat to compensate for your empty heart, and that what Dajeong must have cooked smelled really good.
“- Wow ! You look like a zombie. A cute zombie, but still a zombie.”
You smiled a little, but it didn’t reach your eyes. You sat down on the stool of the kitchen, watching your roommate finishing up your meal, mind clouded with thoughts of him even if he was the last thing you wanted to think about.
“- On a serious note, are you alright ?”
The casual question made you tear up again, and you had to take a deep breath so you would not cry again. Dajeong turned off the stove and came to sit down beside you, one hand resting on your shoulder as she encouraged you to talk to her. And you did. You told her everything about what had been going on between Yunho and you for months. It felt like it all started yesterday, like it was only a dream. But with the way it was about to end, you rather have not started this at all.
“- I would’ve never thought that you would be the type to go out with our teacher.
- I know. There’s just something about him that I can’t get enough of. I… I think I love him.”
It was the first time you dared to say the words. But it was true. You loved him even if you tried to resist it, even if you tried not to succumb to the temptation he was. But you gave in, and you were happy for as long as it lasted. You knew it would hurt, but you didn’t think it would hurt that much. You underestimated how important he became, how much you relied on him for everything.
“- And it’s not even the fact that he has a girlfriend or someone else that makes me mad, I was okay with that because I had come to terms with the fact that I will never be more than what we were. But he treated me like I was more, he made me think that he cared about me just to pull out something like that. And I had to find out, he didn’t even have the balls to tell me himself.
- He’s a coward, I must admit. And he clearly doesn’t deserve you. He could have never loved you like you need to be loved, you’ll always be a secret with him. It’s better like that.
- Maybe. But it hurts.”
Some tears escaped your eyes again, and Dajeong didn’t hesitate before pulling you into a tight hug, caressing your head as a way to calm you down. She knew how much a heartbreak could hurt, especially when it ended up like that, especially when it was as intense as what you had.
“- I know, lovely. It’s gonna take time, but it’s gonna stop hurting eventually. But I think you should talk with him, ask him clearly what’s going on before completely cutting him out of your life. You need closure, you at least deserve that.”
You nodded as Dajeong proposed that you spent the day together, doing some skincare and talking again and again about the same people for the hundredth time while watching some silly movies to cheer you up. And you did exactly that, trying to not think about him for at least one day. You were anxious to go back to class on Monday, fearing that everything would be awkward, or that he would completely ignore you. Somehow, you found the courage to send him a text throughout the weekend, simply to tell him that you needed some space, some time to think about you and him. You didn’t see the point of lying to him, and you silenced his notifications just after. You were strong enough to answer him, but not to witness him pretend and care about you.
Your resolve started to crumble when you saw how miserable he looked the next few days in class. His eye bags were terrible, and he seemed to have lost all his energy. Usually, Yunho would animate all his classes and passionately teach you his subject, but lately, he was only giving you some group work to do, keeping his interventions to a minimum. He spent his time sitting at his desk, either trying to grade some papers or zoning out, looking through the windows. Everytime his sad eyes fell into yours, your heart clenched and ached. But you didn’t have the strength to confront him about what you saw on his phone. You wanted to talk to him, you wanted him to deny, to tell you it was not what you were thinking and that you were the only one - even if you knew it was impossible and that dreaming about it made everything hurt ten times more badly.
You missed him. You missed hearing his voice, his laugh. You missed his smile, and the dimple he had when you made a terrible joke he couldn’t help giggling at. You missed his touch, the way every time his skin was against yours everything else disappeared. You missed being in his arms, and the sentiment of security it gave you. You simply missed him, and having to see him everyday without being able to look at him for more than a few seconds was a torture. And even if you had unblocked him because you were weak, you continued to ignore every one of his texts and calls either way. It was painful, but a lot less than if he told you face to face that he had someone else, that he lied to you, that he made you fall head over heels for you before fucking it all up, before crushing your heart in between his fingers.
One day, when you came back to your dorm, you found flowers waiting for you by the door. There was no card with it, but Yunho was the only one who knew that lilies were your favourite flowers. And you cried again when you opened the trash can only to find yourself unable to throw the bouquet away. So you kept it, putting it in a vase and placing it on the kitchen’s counter, seeing him every time you looked at the flowers.
Another day, when you handed him back an assignment and that your hand brushed against his, it was like time stopped for a moment. Your breath was knocked out of your lungs as you looked up at him, and the plethora of emotions you caught dancing in Yunho’s eyes was enough to bring you back to when he was calling you angel, to when he was treating you like the most beautiful girl in the world. You ran away as quickly as possible, because you were on the verge of telling him that you loved him, and that it would only make things even more complicated than they already were. You felt so stupid for falling for your teacher, but you felt even more ridiculous for believing that you could be more than a side piece to him.
However, that didn’t stop you from looking at the texts he sent to you, asking you to come meet him in his office because he wanted to explain everything properly. You heard Dajeong words ringing in your head as you took a deep breath and entered the room you had grown familiar with. His scent surrounded you immediately, and Yunho jumped upon your arrival. His glasses were sitting on the bridge of his nose, and his hair were completely dishevelled. You still managed to be smitten by his ethereal beauty. But the way he was looking at you with such desperation forced you to avoid his gaze quickly.
“- Y/N…”
His voice broke down, and your heart broke too, a little more every time he tried to start a sentence. Yunho wanted to forget everything, to hold you in his arms and promise you the world. But he couldn’t, and the way you were hugging yourself made him want to get down on his knees and beg for your forgiveness. In all honesty, he would do it in the blink of an eye if you asked him, he would do anything if it meant you would forgive him. But it was nearly impossible, and he was well aware of that, but you deserved an explanation - that and so much more.
“- What did you want to tell me ?”
Your tone was harsher than you wanted it to be, and you didn’t dare look his way, and Yunho didn’t dare make a step in your direction, afraid that you would run away again. But he had to tell you the truth, he had to be honest for once.
“- It’s not what you think, angel.
- Please, spare me with that, I’m not blind, nor an idiot.
- No, you’re not… And that’s why you deserve to know what is going on. The message you saw the other night was from… My girlfriend.”
You knew it, but to hear him say it was different. It hit exactly the right spot to reopen some wounds that had never healed. You already felt on the verge of tears, but you tried to keep them under control, gripping the handles of your tote bag to ground yourself in reality and brace yourself for what was coming.
“- But I don’t love her anymore, it's been a long time since I’ve stopped feeling anything for her. We met when we were in highschool, and we were a good match at that time. She was my friend before becoming more, but after all this time, there's nothing left of what I felt for her in the beginning. We were only kids, I didn’t even know what I wanted to do with my life and my family had already planned my future with her. They want me to marry her. But I don’t, not at all. But if I leave her, I know that they will never want to see me again. So I stayed with her but you made me realise what it was to live and be happy again, and that I don’t want to marry someone I don't genuinely love.”
While he was talking, Yunho took some steps in your direction, trying to maintain eye contact with you even if all he wanted was to slap himself in the face for how stupid he had been to think he could handle this the way he did it, to think that you would never discover his secret. At least, you were here. At least, you were listening to him. It should mean something. It should mean that everything wasn’t over yet, right ? Yunho held on to that, but when he tried to reach for your hand and you took a step back, your eyes glistening with tears, it was hard to believe that everything could be alright. And to know that he was the reason you were crying made him feel even more guilty.
“- I’m so fucking sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, angel. I wanted to do it a million times, but I was so afraid of losing what we had, I didn’t want to freak you out. And I couldn’t lose you. You are my oxygen, my breath of fresh air in the middle of all this mess, and I need you. I promise I wanted to tell you everything the night you discovered it. But you became so quiet all of sudden, and when I looked at my phone, I assumed you had seen her text. But I swear on my life, I wanted to tell you. I should’ve never lied to you in the first place, I know that, and you can’t imagine how sorry I am.”
You were now sobbing uncontrollably, trying to cover up your voice with your hand, but the hot tears falling down your cheeks were enough proof of how affected you were. Yunho wanted to cradle you in his arms, to protect you from the world like he always did, but he couldn’t shield you from himself and his mistakes. He was supposed to be your safe place, your comfort zone, not to make you feel like that.
“- Do you understand how bad I felt when I saw this message, Yunho ? I… I knew this wouldn’t last, but to realise that you lied to me all this time was even more painful. You made me believe that we had a future together, and you treated me like your girlfriend even when I was not, even when you had someone waiting for you at home. And it hurts.”
Your voice broke down on the last words. You felt pathetic, some kind of silly, naive girl who couldn’t see what was right in front of her eyes, some kind of idiot who thought that it could end well, that it could end without you suffering too much.
“- I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. And I’ll spend the rest of my life apologising if that’s what you want. We can have a future together, I want a future with you.
- I can’t see it. I-I can’t ask you to leave her, and to turn your back on your whole family for me. ”
One tear rolled down Yunho’s cheek, and you wanted to wipe it away, but he did it himself before you could do anything. It was better like that. If you felt his skin against yours again, you didn’t know if you would be able to finish what you started.
“- I could do it. If it’s what it takes to keep you with me I’ll do it. I’ll do anything. I love you, Y/N. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone else. I love you so bad it makes my heart ache. I’m ready to do everything it takes to be with you. Everything.”
You should’ve been happy to hear these words you were longing for him to say, only weeks prior. But right now, it only broke your heart more, it only pushed the knife a little deeper into your open wounds.
“- That’s not what I want for you, you deserve better. I don’t want to fuck up your whole life, even if it meant I could love you.
- But you are my whole life, you’re the only thing I need.”
You wanted to believe him. You wanted to say yes so bad. You wanted to fall back into his touch, to fall back into his arms. But you couldn’t. Still, you let him caress your cheek, swiping his thumb against it to get rid of the tears that had dropped there. It was like you could finally breathe, as if the weight on your heart and the knot in your throat had disappeared only because he touched you. He always had that effect on you. But you had to leave, you had to leave or you would cave in and you knew it wasn’t good for you. So you took his hand in yours, pushing it away slowly, as if not to scare him away. You looked up into his teary, brown eyes. It broke your heart to see him in such a state, but you had to think about yourself too. You had to take care of yourself now that he wasn’t here to do that anymore.
“- I’m sorry, I need some time to think. I’m… Not sure I can love you like this anymore. I’m sorry.”
He tried to smile at you, but it was joyless, without this little sparkle in his eyes that you loved so much.
“- You don’t have to apologise, angel. You did nothing wrong, I’m the one who fucked up. I’m the only one to blame here. Take all the time you need, I’ll wait for you.”
You nodded, and you finally let go of his hand, painfully slow to feel his touch for as long as possible. You took a last look at him before turning away and unlocking the door of his office.
“- Goodbye, Yunho.”
It felt like you were saying farewell, and Yunho wanted to run after you, to beg you to let him still be a part of your life. But he had to respect your choice. So he stayed still, standing there as if it could freeze time in place and give him the ability to come back in time and do things differently. But it was too late, and the only thing he could do was give you space and hope you would grant him a second chance, and hope you would be kind enough to forgive him even if he didn’t deserve it at all.
You thought that clearing up the situation with Yunho would make it easier for you to move on and forget him as you had initially planned, but you clearly were in the wrong. Feeling his eyes on you was even more painful now. But at least, he seemed to have found his energy back. It was the only thing that made you feel a little better. Because you felt like shit, even if you tried to convince yourself that what you did was for the best, that you couldn’t be together, that you had to be sensible, you didn’t want to do all that. You craved his touch, his kisses, his loving gaze. You craved him and his soothing aura. You craved his love. You wanted him back, but everything was so complicated, everything was so messed up, you weren’t even sure it could work.
Even if Yunho respected your wish for space and time, he still hadn’t stopped texting you throughout your days - reminders for you to drink, eat and rest properly. You never answered but you saw the messages and it was all that mattered to him. And even if he tried to come back to his daily life, to his routine, he couldn’t. You had taken such an important place in his heart that everything felt empty without you and your smile to brighten his world. Nothing felt as appealing as before. Reading couldn’t take his mind out of things anymore, because he could only see your annotations on the ones you had given to him. And everytime he passed by Mrs McMillan bookstore, his thoughts immediately came back to you and how pretty you looked that day.
So when some colleagues from the university invited him to have some drinks after work, he said yes. Yunho hoped that some alcohol and talking about anything and everything could take his mind off of you. But all it did was make it worse. With each drink, he felt the urge to call you even stronger. All he wanted was to at least hear your voice, hear his name fall from your lips, see your face, even if the pain he caused was written all over it.
“- Angel…
- Yunho ? Why are you calling me ? Is there something wrong.”
He sighed in relief at finally hearing your voice ringing in his ears again, at finally hearing you say his name. He preferred the surname you had granted him, but he would take everything that you were willing to give him.
“- I just… I miss you, and I need you, and I’m sorry. I wanted to tell you again. Because I feel like I didn’t apologise enough.
- It’s okay, I swear. I told you I need some time. Everything is…. Puzzling.
- Still, I’m sorry.
- I know you are.”
There was silence, but the fact that you hadn’t hung up yet made a little bit of hope blossom in his heart. Maybe there was still a chance. Maybe there was still a world in which you could grant him your forgiveness.
“- I can’t imagine my life without you. I tried. But I can’t. I need you, angel.
- You know that we can’t, that I can’t. You have a girlfriend, and your family, a career. I can’t just come in and mess up everything.
- I don’t care about all of that. If I’m with you it’s worth it. Please, angel, let me at least see you, even if it’s the last time I get to have you. I want you, one last time. After that, I’ll let you go if that’s what you really want, and I promise you will never have to worry about me again.”
You stayed silent for a while again, your defeated sigh being the only noise echoing through the line.
“- Okay. But this is the last time.”
However, when you joined him in the hotel room you had grown familiar with, you didn’t want it to be the last time. You wanted to stay in his arms forever. You didn’t talk, afraid of the things you could say, afraid you would beg him to stay, to come back, to do exactly what he swore he would do if only you asked him. But you tried not to think about that as you let him kiss you tenderly, as if you were going to break under his touch. And you might, because you needed him so bad it made everything hurt when he was not there.
No words were exchanged as you got rid of your clothes. No words were exchanged when you pushed him down onto the bed and straddled his thighs. No words were needed when you kissed him for the first time in weeks. It felt like you could both finally breathe, like you felt alive again, and it made all the pain go away for just a moment.
“- I missed you, angel, missed you so fucking much…
- Me too, Yu.”
This was all you were able to say before he shut you up with another desperate kiss, making out with you as if it was the last time he got to have your lips on his - and maybe it would be. So you just decided to shut off your brain, simply running your hands through his hair and thinking about nothing else. You wanted to take your time and appreciate his touch, his eyes and the way he was moaning under your hands, but it felt like you were in a hurry, quickly discarding both of your underwear and sinking down on his cock. You gripped his shoulders, closing your eyes as you let yourself bask into the feeling of finally being full. But your desire took over you, grinding on his dick desperately.
And Yunho couldn’t look at your face, couldn’t see your beautiful eyes without thinking back to them filling up with tears the day he messed up everything between the two of you. But his body was overwhelmed by the feeling of you wrapped around him after weeks of only being able to look at you from afar, relying on his souvenirs to remember what it felt like to kiss you. He desperately wanted to engrave your face in his memories and keep it there forever, but it was too hard. So instead, he just flipped you over the bed, burying his head in your neck to not be tempted to cross your gaze anymore. But his hands still found their way to yours, fingers intertwining as he sped up the pace of his thrusts, both of you moaning in harmony.
It wasn’t as intimate or as emotional as Yunho wanted your last time together to be like. But the alcohol was clouding his mind even more than everything he felt for you, and the urge to make you his - even if you weren’t, and that you would never be - was taking over him more and more with every clench of your cunt around him.
“- Fuck, angel… Tell me you love me please…”
You didn’t want to, because you knew how that would make both of you feel, but the words spilled out from your lips before you could stop it, squeezing his hands tighter.
“- I love you, I love you so much…”
It was enough for Yunho to feel a rush of emotions and desire flood through his veins, his thrusts becoming sloppy and losing any kind of rhythm. It all felt too much, from the way he was hitting your sweet spot to the way his little whines mixed with “i love you”’s that made your heart throb and your mind wanting to hear more of them. It all felt too much to the point you felt on the verge of tears as he laid on top of you, trying to regain some consciousness. But you were fully aware of everything that had just happened, and even if you wanted nothing more than to spend another night in his arms, you knew it wouldn’t do you any good. So you stayed like that until he fell asleep, murmuring again and again against your skin how much you meant to him, that he needed you. And then you ran away, putting your clothes back on in a hurry and checking out your appearance in the mirror of the elevator you had grown familiar with. Except that this time, there was nothing left from the joyful sparkle that usually brightened your eyes whenever you left the hotel. All you could see was how miserable he made you once again, all you could see were the tears cascading down your cheeks and along the marks he left on your neck. You slapped your hand on your mouth, pathetically trying to cover up your sobs. It hurt even more than that day, for some reasons. It all hurt too much to hold it in.
When Yunho woke up in the morning to an empty bed, he was not surprised, but he was still disappointed. He wished he could have woken up one last time to your pretty and relaxed face, he wished he could have held you through the night one last time. Even if it happened only a few times, when you were too tired to go back to your dorms, it still felt incredibly right to open his eyes and see you all cuddled up against him. Getting up and leaving the room he had so many memories in revealed to be a lot more difficult than he thought it would have been. He took his time getting dressed and making sure he didn’t forget anything before slowly closing the door behind him. Taking a quick look at his reflection in the elevator’s mirror like you did only a few hours ago was enough to notice how wretched he was. His hair were a mess, his eye bags were even worse than a few days before despite him having overslept, and his clothes were wrinkled. But the way it was written all over his face was even more telling.
The ride back to his apartment was like a walk of shame - because he had promised to his girlfriend that he would be back before 2am, because he made you suffer again, because he felt like shit, like there was no escape from this situation he put himself in. Yunho only had time to hope that Hana was still asleep but as soon as he opened the door, she jumped from her spot on the couch where she had apparently spent a lot of time worrying, seeing how panicked she seemed.
“- Where were you !? You told me you would be back last night and it’s fucking 10am, Yunho !”
Her anger was totally justified, but the only thing he wanted to do right now was to just be swallowed by the floor, or to curl up in his bed and not get up for the next three years.
“- I’m sorry, baby, I…
- You what !? It’s the fourth time you’re pulling something like that on me this month, what is going on !?”
Yunho was ready to serve her another well prepared lie, the ones he kept on telling her since he started ditching her to be with you. But he just couldn’t bring himself to say that they all got back to one of his coworkers apartment to keep drinking after the bar closed, and that his phone died so he couldn’t warn her about it, and that he was too drunk and out of his mind to think about borrowing one of his colleagues’. He couldn’t lie to her right now, he couldn’t anymore. And as if it was now a habit every time you sneaked into his mind, he felt tears prickling his eyes, dropping his head low like the coward he was because he couldn’t bear to see her hurt, to see her crying because of him too. And as it had become quite usual for him through the course of these last weeks, apologies slipped past his lips.
“- I’m sorry Hana, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry…
- Yunho… Tell me what happened, talk to me. You’ve been so distant and quiet lately, it’s not like you to be so… So absent.”
He wanted to answer, to finally tell her the truth, to tell her everything, but he couldn’t get any word to leave his mouth, only quiet sobs resonating in the hallway as he tried to stop the tears from running down his cheeks. Slowly, Hana got closer to him, taking his hands in hers and guiding him to the couch where he sat down without any resistance and let her pull him into a hug. She could hear his voice shaking and breaking down everytime he let out another apology. It took a long moment for Yunho to finally be able to calm down and find his words back. And when he did, it didn’t make things easier, it didn’t make telling her easier.
“- I… I met someone.”
The sad but knowing smile spreading on her lips told him everything he needed to know. Because, of course, she was not dumb. Of course, she had understood a long time ago what was going on. Of course, Yunho was the only asshole, the only one to blame for everything he put her, and you, through.
“- I expected you to say that.
- I’m so fucking sorry, Hana. I never meant for that to happen, I hadn’t even thought about doing that before I met her. And once it started I couldn’t stop, and when I wanted to tell you everything, it was already too late to not hurt you, and I just got carried away. I’m sorry, I really didn-
- Stop ! Just… Stop.”
So Yunho did, anxiously watching her as she ran a hand through her hair, probably trying to come up with an easy way to tell him that he was a bastard. Which he was, to be honest.
“- I’m not an idiot. I know that you stopped loving me years ago, Yunho. And I’m not blind either, I saw how you got that sparkle in your eyes back one day, and I knew very well it was not because of me. And before you say anything about being sorry, I know it. I know you are, and I know that you wouldn’t have wanted to hurt me even if I’m just a friend in your eyes.
- Hana…
- Don’t look at me like that, it’s not a big deal. We’ve been a couple since highschool, it was impossible for us to keep on loving each other until the end of times. I stopped feeling any romantic feelings a while ago, too. Our families are simply what they are, and we can’t change them. But I’m kind of glad you gave us a valid excuse to break up.”
Yunho couldn’t help the giggles that escaped him. She always had that dark humour that he loved so much, and that nobody got except for him and her.
“- You did not just forgive me for cheating on you because you wanna break up, right ?
- Oh, I certainly did !”
Both of them laughed it off, and it was like a weight was lifted off of his chest, like he could finally breathe a little better. Not as well as when he was with you, but it was a little less bad, now.
“- You’re sure you wanna do this ? You know how much trouble we’re gonna get into if we break up, right ?
- I know, and trust me when I tell you that I’ve thought about it a lot before. And I’m ready, I don’t want them to dictate my life anymore. I think you can understand that better than everyone else.
- Yeah.”
Silence fell back onto the room, and Yunho never felt more at home in his own apartment than after having agreed to break up with his years-long relationship. But he knew it was better like that, knew that they both needed to finally close this chapter of their life and take a new beginning.
“- We’re still friends, though, right ? I still need to hear you spill all the tea about your weird coworkers.”
Hana laughed loudly, and the smile spreading on her lips had never been this wide since so much time that he almost forgot what she looked like when she was happy.
“- Of course ! And I wanna know all the updates about that girl, because she must be brave to want to engage in a relationship with you.”
It was his turn to smile and let happiness fill him again. Why he waited so much time to finally be honest with her when it was clear that they had no feelings for each other anymore would certainly forever be an enigma. But at least, they were both free. At least, Hana could find someone that will truly love her, that will love her like she deserved to be loved. And Yunho didn’t know if that would be enough to convince you that he was serious about you, that he truly loved you, but he had to try. Because you were worth every tear he shed, and all the pain in the world. He would go through these weeks of anguish again and again if it meant you would take him back.
But Yunho had always been a gentleman - and yeah, it was ironic to describe himself like that after everything he had done - and he let you have as much time as you needed, as much space as you asked for. And even when the urge of letting you know about everything that happened was strong, he resisted the temptation to call you, or to send you a text he knew you would not read because you stopped doing that since that night.
Everytime his gaze crossed yours in class, it was as if the first time he kissed you in that empty classroom replayed in his mind, it was as if he could still see himself wearing his leather jacket more often only because it still smelled like you and your perfume, it was as if he could still hear you say you loved him for the first time. Everytime his gaze crossed yours in class, he wished you wouldn’t shy away, he wished you wouldn’t look so hurt, he wished he could go back in time and not do all the mistakes he did, he wished he could do everything right and make you happy, and love you right.
Still, he let you run away after every class so you wouldn’t risk staying in his presence too much. Still, he let you slip through his hands a little more every time you answered his questions about books he had given to you without that energy and passion you had when it was only the two of you in that hotel room, when everything was still perfect. But it also felt like if he didn’t do something right now, you were gonna leave and never come back in his life. He had to do something, he had to stop being a loser, he had to show you that you were never the second choice.
You were surprised to find another bouquet of lilies on your doorstep before going to class on a random Wednesday. It had been weeks since you last talked to him outside of classes, and it had been more than two months since you last looked at his texts. You weren’t strong enough to block his number again, but you tried not to open the messages anymore. This time there was something written on a little note ; him asking you to meet him by the hill he showed you the night it all went down if you were willing to listen to him, and that if you didn’t come, he would understand that you didn’t want to see him again and that he would leave you alone, no questions asked.
You thought that you would hesitate more, but in your heart, you had already made the decision to go as soon as you saw the bouquet of your favourite flowers he managed to remember even months after you told him. When you parked your car at the spot he had showed you, his was already there. Yunho was waiting for you, contemplating the cityscape, leaning against the hood of his car, hands in the pockets of his black pants, his white tee moving along with the wind. He looked good in anything, but these simple outfits were always making him look so cosy that you wanted nothing more than snuggling in his arms.
The warmer wind of the end of spring hit your face as soon as you put your feet outside, the breeze making your hair and the skirt of your flowy dress fly around like you were in some type of dramatic movie. Expect that in those, it always ended well, and that you knew for a fact that your happy end was impossible. But Yunho turned to look at you almost in slow motion, and this time, you couldn’t avoid his intense stare, and this time, you wanted to dive back into whatever the two of you had.
“- You came.”
His voice was steady, but you could still hear the relief seeping through his words.
“- You asked.”
It was as simple as that, as simple as breathing and walking, as simple as reading and writing. He asked, he called, and you were there in a heartbeat because you would sell your soul for him.
“- We broke up. We agreed that we didn’t love each other anymore for a long time, and that it was the best decision for both of us.”
You wanted to be sarcastic, wanted to tell him something along the lines of “you want a medal or something”, but it was only because you didn’t know how to deal with that information. Because you didn’t know if it meant anything to him, if it meant anything to you. Before you could think about a kinder response, Yunho continued.
“- I told you I was willing to do everything if it meant I could be with you, and I was serious. This is the first step, and I’m gonna go all the way even if you’re not willing to give me a second chance because you made me realise how wrong I was all this time.
- But you have a family, friends and a job. You won’t give all that up for me, I don’t want you to.
- Angel, I’m taking all these risks because it’s for you, because I want you to see that I’m ready to do anything it takes to be with you, and that I’ll keep proving that you didn’t make a mistake by choosing me if you’re letting me come back into your life. My family gave up on me a long while ago, it’s only time for them to understand everything they put me through. And I believe that my friends will be wise enough to choose to support me, because you’re my happiness, and that’s what they should wish for me.
- Yes, but you’ll still be my teacher.
- I’ve been your teacher until then and it didn’t cause any problems, did it ? And even if I got in trouble, I know we would figure something out. You mean everything to me Y/N, and I will spend the rest of my life making myself worthy of you if you let me because I love you like I’ve never loved anyone else before.”
Your mind wanted you to say no, but your heart was begging for you to say yes, to give in, to let yourself be happy. And for once, you decided to stop being reasonable. For once, you decided to let things go, to let him guide you through it, to let yourself live.
“- You already are. You’ve always been worthy of me, Yu. I-I love you too, I love you so much.”
This time, when tears started to run down your cheeks, Yunho didn’t hesitate one second before pulling you into his arms, running his fingers against your back to soothe you. The way you immediately circled his waist to have him closer to you made his heartbeat pick up, and you chuckled lightly against his chest when you noticed it. And you stayed like that for who knows how long. The only thing you were aware of was that you’ve never felt as good as when you were in his arms. And maybe it was wrong, maybe it was a mistake. But it felt just right, it clicked perfectly, like the last pieces of a puzzle you had forgotten on your desk for years and that you finally came back to complete only now. When you raised your head to look him in the eyes, Yunho smiled, and you couldn’t help doing the same, especially when he kissed your forehead, and then your nose, and then your lips.
“- In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.”
You wanted to slap him for being so cheesy, but the way your heart missed a couple of beats at the intensity with which he was looking into your eyes rendered you unable to talk, unable to think about some quote to say back to him.
“- If you keep on confessing to me like that, I might give in, you know…
- Don’t worry about that, angel, I have a ton of citations you’re gonna love.”
His boyish grin made you smile wider, and you couldn’t help the urge to kiss him again, because now you had the right to do so. Being the teacher’s pet had its downsides, but in terms of love confessions, you were certain that Yunho would never run out of ideas. And you were okay with that, because as long as he was with you and that you were with him, there was no way something would go wrong. You smiled at him, and he smiled at you, and as the sun set behind you like in the romance movies you despised, you thought that maybe, happy endings were not so bad in the end, especially when you were the one getting kissed passionately at the end of the film.
-> i don't allow any copies, translations or reposts of my work.
-> moon dividers by @samspenandsword
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pope just loves kissing.
since getting together with you, he felt he couldn’t stop himself. he always thought pda wouldn’t really be his thing, and that intimacy was for the privacy of your own home — but with a girl as beautiful as you, he wanted the world to know you were his.
kisses on the cheek when you’d be listening to jj ramble about something, an innocent look of wanting to be a good and active listener on your face as he rambles on — not used to the group dynamic being that — whatever jj said you had a free pass to just zone out. he thought you looked so sweet, blinking in interest and nodding your head, lips parted slightly in confusion as to where his story was going. pope had huffed out a quiet laugh when he’d peeped you giving him the time of day, wrapping an arm around your waist and pecking you adoringly on the rounded skin of your face.
kisses on your chest down the centre column down to the tops of your tits when you’d throw your head back to laugh. he loved the sound, the way your shyness melted away for a moment to indulge in the humour of a conversation. your skin would always be glowing there, like the goodness of your heart was physically projecting through the skin of your torso causing you to have this otherworldly glimmer to you. his giddy smile would melt into a pucker as he’d suddenly tuck his head under your chin to kiss your body, even in public, hands splayed around your lower back to tug you closer until you squirm in embarrassment, hot in the face.
kisses to your knuckles as a greeting. he was always an old romantic, your sweet voice often greeting him with “hi romeo.” the nickname warming his heart and controlling his body. he’d hold the eye contact as he’d bow slightly, pressing a kiss to your knuckles as you’d laugh happily. “what, too corny?” he’d ask, wrapping that same arm around you and walking by your side.
kisses to your thighs when you’d just happen to stand infront of him wearing a pretty dress or skirt. he’d be sat, and as you speak his gaze would lower to the length of your hem, that polite smile never once leaving his face. it would be like you could see the cogs turning in his brain as he’d take in the soft skin of your thighs, his large hands sliding round to grip the back of them before he bends at the waist to press a kiss to each thigh, perhaps even nipping at the skin as you yelp a little. “po!” you’d scold lightheartedly, and he’d return his gaze, choosing to rub his hands up and down the back of your thighs. “what?” he’d ask innocently, willing you to continue.
kisses to the corner of your mouth during more vulnerable moments. perhaps you’d have a bad day, tired and upset — and your boyfriend had cornered you somewhere safe in public away from wandering eyes to slip his thumb in your mouth. “hey, you’re okay.” he’d coo, voice buttery and warm and comforting as your eyes would flutter, letting yourself melt into that safe submissive space. drool would gather around your lips and at the base of his thumb but he wouldn’t mind, filling your space so that all you could see was him as he tilts his head, pressing the softest kisses to the corner of your mouth as you continue to suck on his thumb. “you’re safe with me, pretty baby.”
kisses to your clit later on when he’s got you settled. little ones, soft as a feather as his soft lips brush over your spread petals to read the twitching bud. you’re a little clammy and messy, spread out on his sheets with his toned arms wrapped around your thighs. he won’t go further yet, not until he feels you’re ready to immerse yourself in the pleasure. for now, he’s enjoying the strained little whimpers and arches of your back each time he presses his mouth down on your pleasure point, humming and cooing against his girl as the sweet nectar drools from the lips down to the sheets.
he just liked to kiss you. everywhere.
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Hopeful
Soft! Jackson Joel Miller x Neurodivergant/ ADHD F!reader
Summary: Joel hasn't felt hopeful since before the outbreak, that is before he meets you when he arrives in Jackson. Hes falling for you, but you couldn't possible fee the same way, could you?
Soft! Jackson Joel miller x Neurodivergant\ ADHD reader AU
MDNI 18+ NSFW
Warnings: unspecified age gap (i wrote this with reader in her early 30s and Joel in is early 50s but no ages are specifically said) soft Joel, concerned Joel, protective Joel, Neurodivergant, audio overstimulation, anxiety. He falls first. Match maker Ellie. Smut. Oral (F! receiving) Fingering, heavy make out sessions. Joel's chatty. body imagine issues, low self-esteem. Swearing, dirty talk. Praise.
A/N: Man this story really got away from me! what i thought would be a short story turned out to be rather length but im proud as hell of this story and i hope you enjoy!
There’s not a lot of descriptors about reader other than eye color and mentions of curves/ plush but they can easily be changed.
Hopeful.
Hopeful wasn’t something Joel felt since before the outbreak. But when he met you, it started brewing slow and low just below the surface until he couldn’t deny it anymore, couldn’t push it away any longer. You made him feel hopeful.
“Dude if you stare much longer the whole town is gonna notice.” Ellie teases as she jabs Joel with her elbow.
“Oh stop it, I wasn’t staring”
“You’ve been looking at her for like 10 minutes, just go sit with her”
Joel turns away quickly feeling his face getting red. He thought he was doing a better job of keeping his fondness for you hidden. He figured there was no way you’d share the same feelings, why would you like a guy like him? Old, beat up, and someone the whole town talked about. He figured there just wasn’t any way.
“She don’t want me bothering her” Joel shrugs
“Im not lying when I say she asks about you when you haven’t been to the stables yet.”
A slight smile tugs at Joel’s lips, he always asks Ellie about you too.
“Go sit with her”Ellie nudges him
Joel let’s out a nervous sigh and makes his way over to your table.
You’re fully engrossed in your book that you don’t notice Joel standing there for a moment.
“Is this seat taken darlin’?”
You don’t even have to look to know it’s Joel, you’d know his voice anywhere.
You chuckle, looking up at him with that smile and those big beautiful hazel eyes he loved so much.
“What’s funny?”
“Unless Ellie and Dina are sitting with me, that seats never taken”
Joel frowns at your comment.
“You want some company? It ok if I sit?”
“I’d love some” you say trying not too seem to eager but your bursting with butterflies over Joel wanting to sit with you. Your smile happens automatically, like it always does with Joel.
You’d been fond of Joel since him and Ellie arrived in Jackson. Despite all the whispers about him in town, his presence always calmed you in a way nobody ever had, you couldn’t explain it even if you tried. You absolutely adored Ellie from the moment you met her, Joel always telling you she trusts you in a way he’s never seen before.
The two of you fall into comfortable small talk as you both finish breakfast.
“Didn’t see you at the town dance last night”
“That’s because I didn’t go, you went?”
“Well Ellie and Dina wanted to go cause they’re always reading about dances in the diaries they find, so I went too. Plus Ellie’s always teasin’ me that I need to get out more”
“I don’t normally go to stuff like that, I’m too awkward and I don’t want people asking me to dance because they feel bad.”
“Now I’m sure there would be lots of people who’d like to dance with you” Joel has all he can do not to tell you he’d show up to dance with you everytime if he knew you’d be there.
“That’s really kind of you to say, but incase you haven’t noticed the people here don’t really know how to take me.”
“You headin to the stables?” Joel already knows the answer. He knows it’s not your day to work at the stables but he asks anyways because he doesn’t want the conversation to end.
“ No, today I’m working on getting the little town library set up, now that you and Tommy are finished building the shelves, I’d like to open it soon.”
“Y’need any help? I’m off my normal duties today”
“Oh no, it’s ok. You don’t have to do that. I don’t want to bother you on your free time”
“It’s really no trouble at all, I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t want to help” Joel’s jokes, smiling at you.
Your laugh.
He’d give anything to hear your laugh over and over again.
“And I guess I wouldn’t accept if I didn’t want help and company” you teased back, trying to stifle the giggle that bubbles up.
She wants company, my company?
The two you you load up the first wagon full of books and wheel across the center of town to the little store front soon to be the The Jackson Town Library.
“Here we can unload them. Then I can keep making the trips back and forth with the cart while you set them up in the shelves”
“Sounds like a deal to me. Why don’t we make like 3-4 trips and stop for the day. Because if not we’re both the type of people to work on our whole day off.”
“You got yourself a deal sweetheart”
Joel can’t help but smile as he turns to make the second trip. There was just something about the way you made him feel at ease, that he couldn’t get over.
When Joel returned with the second load of books he found you and Ellie chatting as she was helping you.
“What was it like to have a birthday party and sleepovers?” Ellie asks you.
“What makes you ask that?” You ask chuckling a little.
“Well I’ve been reading about them in the people from before the outbreaks diaries but I never had either of them”
“They were fun for a lot of people, I um didn’t really have a lot of friends, so my birthday parties were always mostly family. And I only ever went to a few sleep overs. I was always so excited to be included when I got to go to them.”
It breaks Joel’s heart listening to you and Ellie talking. It wasn’t fair that Ellie never got to experience what life was like before the outbreak, never really getting a childhood. Hearing you talking about how hard and lonely your life was even as a child tore him up. You were different sure, but you had a heart of gold. You were so caring, always supporting everyone who needed something and all you wanted was love and care in return.
He wanted to be that person for you so badly, the one who made your heart soar with all the love and support you never had. To be the one to make you laugh on the good days and take you into his arms and take the pain away on the bad days.
He’s not sure exactly when he started to fall for you, but it was coming on faster and stronger by the day.
“My birthday is next weekend, could I have a birthday party?”
You looked up locking eyes with Joel
“Of course you can, we can throw you a birthday party Ellie” you smile at him as you answer.
We. She wants to help me throw a birthday party for Ellie? There’s no bounds to how wonderful and caring this woman is.
“ I of course want to invite you, Dina, Jesse, Ethan, uncle Tommy and Maria. Ooo can I have a sleep over?”
“No boys are sleeping over”
You can’t help but laugh at Joel’s abrupt response.
“Eww no of course not, but Dina and (y/n) could stay over couldn’t they?”
“ yes if they want to they are more then welcome”
“Oh this is awesome, I gotta go tell everyone!”
“Wait, shouldn’t you ask if (y/n) wants too?” Joel’s looking at you to gage your reaction
“Of course, I wouldn’t miss it for the world”
Ellie smiles wildly as she runs out of the store front.
——————————————————————
The day came for Ellie’s party, and you loaded up your wagon with all the supplies and headed over there early to help set up.
“Jesus you’ve got a lot of stuff, you didn’t have to go through all this trouble”
“I know but I really wanted to make this as special as I could for her. She deserves to have the experiences she never got too”
Your big heart made Joel’s soar, you were so kind and thoughtful.
“ I do have a big surprise for her, for all the kids really”
“Oh yea? What do you have up your sleeve?” Joel teases.
“So I went through some boxes that had been in the house in one of the closets. I never bothered to before because it’s not like I really have a lot of stuff so they weren’t in the way. But I wanted to see if there was anything I could use for Ellie’s party and man I hit the jackpot”
Joel just smirks and raises a eyebrow signaling you to continue.
“Well one I found another Will Livingston pun book, which she’s going to love and I found a Nintendo console with a bunch of game cartridges. I figured we could teach the kids how to play and then Ellie can keep it”
There it is again, we. Maybe I’m reading into this to much. But I can’t help but feel like she actually likes spending time with me.
“Shit, they’re all going to love it! Man I haven’t played with one of these in ages”
“Me either, I was never any good at them and the sounds drove me crazy”
Joel relished moments like this, when you pulled back the curtain you shielded yourself with and let him see you.
You sat there completely content and full of joy watching Joel teach the kids how to play each game before he joined you on the couch as they went crazy battling each other.
As the kids cheer and the Mario music blasts Joel looks over to see you struggling. Your eyes shut tightly, chest rising and falling quicker than normal
“Hey, want to have a drink in the kitchen?” Joel whispers as he places his hand lightly on your arm.
“Please” you whisper, embarrassed that Joel saw you like that.
You sit at the kitchen table while Joel takes out two glasses with ice and pours whiskey doubles into them.
“Everything alright darlin’?” Joel ask as he takes his seat sliding your glass over to you.
“Oh..yea..everything’s alright” you say staring down at the amber liquid. Embarrassment flooding your system.
“I ain’t gonna push you if you don’t want to talk and I know I probably ain’t your first choice of someone to talk to, but just know you can talk to me.”
Joel desperately wants to know about your struggles, what makes you the way you are. He wants to be the one that helps you through life, the one who makes the bad days good and the good days better. But he pushes aside the thoughts that you’d want to be more than just friends, if you even considered him that. Because after all why would a girl like you like someone like him, could he really be that lucky?
You think about your answer for a few beats, and realize there’s no use trying to lie to Joel. There was just something about Joel that was comforting, that made you feel safe, but in a different way than the way you felt with Tommy you just couldn’t put your finger on it.
“No its not at all like that. I like talking to you.” You don’t miss the way Joel’s eyes light up a little.
“It’s just….I usually just retreat into myself, it’s easier that way. Most people don’t want to hear about my weird issues that can’t be solved with a why don’t you just ignore it?, why can’t you just change? Can’t you be a little less weird?” You said with a defeated shrug.
You wanted to talk to Joel, but part of you hoped he would just change the subject and move on. Because your quiet sure he doesn’t actually want to hear about your ADHD and all the weird idiosyncrasies that came with it.
“Well I’m not most people” he drawled as he lightly touched your arm. Nodding his head to encourage you to continue.
Truthfully he wanted to hear anything you wanted to tell him, Joel wanted to be your comfort point, the person that you went to for anything. To be the person you felt the safest with, to let your tired shoulders relax from holding up that wall around yourself. Letting your true self shine, free from judgement and surrounded by the love you deserve.
“I have sensory issues, especially with audio and textures. It’s hard to explain and it’s been along time since anyone wanted me too, so bare with me because some of this isn’t going to make a whole lot of sense.”
“You take all the time you need sweetheart, there no rush or pressure. I’m here for you”
Joel can’t help but notice your eyes soften and body langue relax a little when you realize he’s got you, that he’s hear for you and truly listening.
“I get overwhelmed easily by a lot of sounds happening at once, like in there with the sounds of the game and all the yelling and cheering at the same time makes my brain feel scrambled up. Like I can’t sort any of it out, it just sounds like one big mixing bowl of sounds. And when that happens I get anxious, my heart starts to pound, my ears ring and sometimes I lash out coming off to aggressive in the moment to try and make it stop.”
“ you’ve been around enough at the stables, you’ve probably heard me come on a little to strong with a razor sharpe tongue when it all gets to much. I always feel so bad, I never mean to snap. But sometimes when it’s so overwhelming it’s like I have no control of my tongue and I just blurt it out before I even realize I’m saying anything.”
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Ask me anything you’d like and I’ll do my best to answer”
“I don’t want this to come out wrong, I’m realizing now this might sound a little weird. But I’ve noticed you fuss with your clothes, like your pulling them away from your skin constantly, is-is that part of the sensitivity?”
You can’t help but look at Joel for a few beats to long, stunned by his question. Not because of the way he worded it but because of the context of his question, that fact that he’s picked up on your discomfort and is curious about it instead of just asking why you can’t just deal with it like everyone else ever has.
“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean t’make you uncomfortable” Joel says taking your silence as a bad sign.
“No, you didn’t at all. I just got lost in the thought of you being so observant but always wanting to know.”
“I always want to ask if your alright but I never want to pry, I know you like your space”
You can’t help the smile that dances across your face.
“You can ask me anything Joel, if I’m not comfortable answering I’d tell you.”
“But yes, the clothing thing is part of it. The texture of some fabrics against me make me want to crawl out of my skin. It’s hard sometimes for me to fall asleep too because the way the blankets and sheets touch my skin doesn’t feel right. I know it’s weird, I can’t really explain it.”
“It’s not just with clothing or fabric either, it’s physical touch too, which is the worst to get people to understand. I hate being touched, the feeling of most people touching me makes my skin crawl. And they love to brush it off by being like oh well I’m a huggy person or oh I’m just a touchy person so it’s ok.”
“I’m sorry, I know Ellie hugs you all the time and I know I touched you earlier”
“See now this is the most frustrating and complicated part about this. There are people like you, Ellie and Tommy that are in my bubble that I’m comfortable with, that I trust, that that kind of contact is welcome from.”
She likes when I touch her? Am I a welcome presence for her? I’ll drive myself crazy thinking about this too hard, but maybe just maybe she’s trying to tell me she feels the same as I do?
“Then the flip side of it is that there are also sounds that bring me so much comfort, like songs that I could listen to on repeat without batting an eye. The sound of someone’s voice that brings me back to earth when the anxiety is unrelenting. A scent that soothes me beyond explanation.”
Joel can’t help but let his thoughts run wild, indulging in the thought that you might be talking about him. He’s about to ask about your comment when Ellie barges into the kitchen.
“Oh sorry to interrupt” she says when she realizes you two are deep in conversation.
“Oh no it’s ok, you probably just saved me from really embarrassing myself” you chuckle
Joel doesn’t miss the way you stiffen up, as if you feel like you’ve said to much.
“ I’m ready to watch my birthday movie but I’m also really ready for the guys to leave so it’s just the four of us, could you kick them out?”
“ course I can do that, we’ll be right in”
You quickly get up from the table to follow after Ellie.
“Hang on, sweetheart” Joel says softly as he reaches for your arm.
“Can-can I give you a hug? Or rather would you like a hug?”
You can feel the embarrassment really take hold as you pull your eyes to the floor. He had no idea how much you wanted a hug from him and you had no idea how badly he wanted to hug you.
“I would like that” you said meekly as you nod your head. If Joel wasn’t listening intently, hanging on your every word he would of missed it
He takes a few steps closer to you hesitating for a couple beats before he wraps his arms you.
As if you’d been waiting for this moment, your entire body relaxes under his touch. Joel can’t help but notice they way you bury your head into his chest as you wrap your arms around him tighter. The way you stay there in his arms for longer than he expects, like your completely at ease in this moment.
“Thank you….thank you for listening. For letting me talk.” You whisper
“Thank for trusting me, for letting me in” he whispers back.
——————————————————————
It had been a few months since Ellie’s birthday party and Joel couldn’t help but boil over with happiness at seeing more of you. You started coming around often and listening to him play guitar on the porch after your walks with Ellie. You started joining them for family meals more in the mess hall, though Joel couldn’t tell you he called them that- not yet anyway.
Because honestly he was waiting for the other shoe to drop, for you to decide he wasn’t the type of person you wanted to spend alot of time with. It’s why he didn’t press you on wether or not you were coming to his birthday gathering at the tipsy bison tonight that Tommy was putting together. He didn’t want you to feel pressured.
You slip into the dimly lit tipsy bison about 45 minutes before Joel’s party is supposed to end. You were so nervous to come, that it took alot for you to actually leave the house. You realize as you slip into a table in the dark back corner that you also forgot his present at home too.
Somethings seriously wrong with me when I remember to bring my security book and not this man’s damn present.
You scan the room and see Joel and Tommy talking to a few people at the bar. Nervous about interrupting you open up your book and try to block out all the loud chatter.
Joel scans the small crowd hoping to see you when he over hears Caleb talking to Tommy.
“Why would she come to something like this if she’s not going to speak to anyone?”
Joel follows Caleb’s motion, feeling a tugging in his chest when he lays eyes on you. You’re sitting in the dark corner of the Tipsy Bison hunched over your book, rubbing your finger back and forth on the cover. Something Joel picked up on that you do when your anxious as a way to sooth yourself.
“Sorry we can’t all be rays of fucking sunshine like you” Joel hears Ellie snap back as he’s making his way over to you.
The closer he gets to you the more his heart pounds. When was the last time I ever felt like this if ever. Joel doesn’t know when it started happening but he can’t fight it any longer, he’s falling for you hard and fast like a fright train. You consume his every thought, which terrifies the hell out of him but he can’t turn back now, not even if he tried.
“Hey there sweetheart, you came” for one fleeting moment Joel feels nervous, maybe you don’t want to be bothered because after all you didn’t even tell him you were here. But that all melts away the moment you look at him. The smile that touches your eyes, the shimmer of happiness that dances across your face.
“Hey!”
“It ok to join you?”
“Of course, I’d love that. As long as I’m not taking your time away from anyone else?”
“There isn’t one person in here I’d rather talk to”
The way you beam up at him as you quickly but your book back in you’re bag says it all. This is another sign of yours that Joel’s picked up on, you only do this when you’re comfortable and want to talk to someone. You always do this when you see him, he trys so hard not to read into that but at this point it’s impossible.
The two of you sit and talk for a bit. You can’t help but be consumed by all things Joel when you were around him, and you loved that. The way he looked at you like you were the only other person in the world or the way he made you feel when ever he was near was both to much snd not enough. Your feelings for him charging full steam ahead, there’s no way you’d stop them even if you had the option.
But could he really feel the same?
“Well I should go I don’t want to take you away from your friends to long”
“Oh, let me walk you home”
“No no it’s ok, I’ll be alright, it’s your party” you say frowning, not wanted to inconvenience him in any way.
“Sweetheart…I can promise you most these people ain’t here for me”
You pause for a few beats
“Ok, in that case I’d love that” unable to control the sincere wild smile that dances across your lips at the thought of Joel Miller walking you home.
“Um ah- would you like to come in for a minute? I ah have a gift for you but I forgot it when I left for your party” you smile sheepishly up at Joel as you reach your little house.
“You have a gift for me?”
“Yea…I made you a birthday present”
Joel follows you inside your house, and instantly the scent of you is filling his senses. He watches as your disappear down the hall and into a room, unsure if he can follow you mixed with not wanting to scare you has him staying in the kitchen.
“Here it’s not much, but I wanted to do something” you say nervously handing him the small gift wrapped in a scrap piece of fabric.
You lean back against the counter as Joel takes the gift, unwrapping the corded string holding the fabric around the gift like wrapping paper.
You’re overcome with anxiety watching him, making it near impossible to look at him. What if he doesn’t like it? What if it’s to much? Joel doesn’t miss the way your fidgeting around nervously.
As Joel pulls back the last fold of fabric he reveals a smallish leather bound note book. As he turns it over in his hands the light catches right for him to notice stitched into the cover in a slightly different colored string than the leather is his name.
“You made this for me? Christ it must of taken forever” Joel asks as he runs this fingers over the the letters.
“D-do you like it? I hope it’s not to much?” You say sheepishly, retreating into yourself as your wrap your arms around yourself.
“No no, it ain’t like that. I love it, I’m just surprised you took the time to make something for me of all people.”
“It took me about two months to do, because I worked on it when I had the energy after rounds at the stables. But I wanted to do something special for you, because.. well because your special to me. When I heard you saying your note book for your patrol and maintenance notes was almost full I got the idea to make this without knowing how to go about it”
“Nobody’s ever done anything like this more me before. Is it ok if I give you a hug sweetheart?”
When Joel takes you into his arms he expects you to be tense before you relax like the few times before,but not this time. No this time was different, this time you melted under his touch immediately burying your face in his chest. He can’t help but think maybe you’ve been needing his touch, his comfort as much as he needs yours.
You feel him pull back from the hug, making you painfully aware you held on to him for a few beats to long. You’re anxiety takes over as you pull back, you’re gaze dropping to the floor immediately.
“Sorry. Sorry, I made that weird”
“Give yourself some credit sweetheart, you never make anything weird. I just wanted to look at you, that’s all”
Pulling your gaze back up, your met with his beautiful deep brown eyes. They’re filled with a soft tenderness as he reaches up caressing the curve of your cheek.
Joel’s large warm hand comes to cup the side of your face, smoothing his calloused thumb back and forth over your cheek bone. His heart thunders in his chest when you lean into his touch, looking more free than he’s ever seen you. Almost as if you’re letting him see a glimpse of yourself from before the world fell apart. He also sees a lightness in your body language that he only notices when the two of you are together.
His eyes flicker between your lips and your eyes a few times, trying to search for any fear or discomfort.
Fuck it.
Your eyes flutter closed as Joel’s lips connect with yours in a soft and tender kiss. Your mind in desperately trying to process everything as Joel takes your stillness as hesitation and pulls away at the exact moment you brain catches up.
“Sorry I misre-“
“Wait, Do it again” you whisper
Joel grabs both sides of your face as he lowers himself back down connecting with your soft lips again. Only this time you don’t hesitate, you return the kiss as you bring your hands to loop round his neck, your fingers sinking into the hair at the nape of his neck. Joel skims his hands down your sides resting them on your hips, a action that makes you gasp as you tilt you’re head up.
“Is this ok?” He whispers as he pulls back enough to rest his forehead against yours.
“Yes” you whisper back, running your fingers deeper into his dark graying hair. This action unlocks something deep inside Joel as he hooks his one hand around your lower back and the other around the back of your head pulling you closer to him. When you resume kissing it’s more passionate and frantic than before and as Joel licks along the seam of your bottom lip begging for entrance you tilt your head up immediately allowing him to deepen the kiss. As your warm wet tongues dance together the grip you two have on each other tightens. Neither of you wanting to show the other how terrified you both are of the other slipping through your fingers if you not holding on for dear life.
As you both pull back to catch your breath you can’t help the giggle that escapes you.
“I guess it’s safe to say you liked your present?”
“It’s safe to say I like more than just the present sweetheart”
He can’t possibly be saying what I think he’s saying can he?”
“I’d invite you to watch a movie but I moved the only tv into the bedroom because it helps me sleep alone and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable”
What I wouldn’t give to spend every night next to her. I never want her to feel alone.
“I’d be more than comfortable with that but only if you are”
Christ I could get lost in the big hazel eyes of hers.
“I honestly would love that” youre trying to hide your smile not wanting to come off too eager but it’s impossible.
You lead the way to your bedroom, once inside you gesture to the bed, “you can pick the movie and make your yourself comfortable I’ll be right back.”
You beeline it for the bathroom, splashing some water on your face and looking at yourself in the mirror. You take a few deep breaths trying to tamp down the anxiety.
Did I really just invite Joel Miller to watch a movie with me in my bed and he accepted? When did I get so bold?
Making your way back to the bedroom you see Joel sitting up with his back against the wall with the few pillows against the wall next to him.
The way your smiling at him makes him feel like it’s just you and him in this world, I feeling that nobody has ever given him before.
“Why don’t you have any pillows you rest your back on?” You say as you settle in next to him.
“I just want to make sure your comfortable, I’ll be fine”
You laugh, that beautiful laugh Joel has come to love so much.
“Well I certainly don’t need all of these, you should be comfortable too” you say as you hand him a couple.
Joel absolutely melts at this action. It speaks volumes to him that your advocating for his comfort as well as your own without even thinking about it or being asked too.
As he’s settling back against the pillows Joel notices you rolling one of your shoulders back as it’s it’s bothering you.
“You alright sweetheart? I’ve been noticing you rolling youre shoulder a lot this week, it botherin’ you?”
“Oh yea… it’s fine, I just tweaked it at the stables. Shimmers stables doors been sticking and the saddles are a little high for me sometimes, but it’s fine. I just gotta go easy on it for a bit”
Joel feels a wave of concern mixed with anger, but not with you with himself.
I should of asked sooner, she shouldn’t be getting hurt at work because of something I could of helped fixed. I need to go down there and fix something.
“ let me take a look at it sweetheart”
You’re embarrassed, your sure he thinks your the biggest idiot as you turn facing your back to him.
“Where does it hurt?”
“It hurts kind of along my shoulder blade”
Joel starts feeling along your shoulder blade applying light pressure.
“Ugh right in there” you quietly groan
“It’s a little swollen, maybe a pinched nerve…I could rub it, try to work it out for y’ou if you’d be comfortable with that.”
“Wait…really?”
“Please don’t feel like you have too, it’s ok”
“It’s no trouble sweetheart”
Joel helps you settle back between his legs as he slips his hand into the neck of your shirt messaging his thumb along your shoulder.
Joel doesn’t miss the relaxed sigh you breath out as your eyes get heavy and you slowly fall back until your back is completely flush again his chest, your head on his shoulder.
He wraps his arms around you tightly, looking down to see you completely asleep in his arms. He leans down softy placing a kiss on your forehead. Warmth slowly creeps up his spine, over his shoulders and deep into his chest. This is what safety feels like, you- are what safety feels like. Joel doesn’t have to have his walls up with you. He can relax, let his guard down, not have to be in a constant state of fight or flight around you. The more Joel let’s this realization consume him, the heavier his eyes get and before he can stop it he starts dozing off.
He snaps awake 10 minutes later to the feeling of you squirming in his arms followed by the sounds of mumbles and whimpers in your sleep. You cry out briefly before you roll over, clutching him with your head buried in the crook of his and your chest flush against his own. Joel can feel your heart pounding against his chest.
“Shhhh baby girl it’s ok, I got you. You’re with me. Your safe” Joel speaks softly rubbing his hands up and down your back.
The moment you hear his voices, the tension drains from your body and your cry’s stop as you fully relax against him.
“Don’t leave me please…I need you ” you’re soft voice speaks against his neck
Joel holds you tightly, unable to shake the memory of you telling him that someone’s voice was soothing to you, that it made you at ease when ever you heard it. He’s 100% confident that you were talking about him.
“Im not goin’ anywhere sweetheart” Joel says as he squeezes you tighter and kisses the crown of your head.
Your so incredibly raw and vulnerable in the moment as you look up at him, your eyes swirling with comfort mixed with fear as you sleepily sit up.
——————————————————————
The next time Joel opens his eyes it’s early morning, your curled up to him, your head on his chest. He can’t help but think he won the lottery. The idea that a women like you would take comfort in him, that you’d want him by you’re side. Joel will make it his mission to make sure you never feel alone again, that he’s by your side for the rest of your life. He doesn’t know what he did to deserve you in his life because he sure as hell didn’t feel like he deserved it.
Joel’s pulled from his thoughts by you sleepily stretch and sitting up. His hand is firmly on your lower back keeping you steady.
“You sleep ok?” He asks slipping his hand under your shirt to rub your lower back.
“I don’t think I’ve slept that deeply since before the outbreak, I’ve never really been a good sleeper”
Christ she’s so beautiful first thing in the morning, givin’ me that cute sleepy smile as she tells me how she slept well next to me.
“Where you able to sleep?”
I can’t tell her I slept better than I have In 20 something years.
“I did get some sleep”
“You hungry? We could go grab Ellie and get breakfast in the mess hall”
Ellie. Fuck I have no idea if any of this is ok with Ellie. I can’t do this to her. I don’t want to drive a wedge between her and Joel or her and I. She’s been though enough I don’t want her to think I’m trying to break up there family.
“ Oh, no it’s ok. You go a head I’m sure you and Ellie have stuff to do today” you say as you you stiffen to sit up straight, the feeling of panic crashing in like a wave.
“No it’s no trouble at all, she should just be over Dina’s anyway” Joel feels your body going ridged, he can tell by your eyes that somethings changing.
“ I have so much to do at the library still before it can open, I’m really not hungry. I’ll just grab something before breakfast ends.” You say swinging your legs over the side of the bed and hurriedly looking for clean clothes.
Joel feels it, he sees it your body langue that somethings wrong. He doesn’t know what flipped the switch but he’s desperate to fix it.
“You should take it easy on your shoulder, rest it so it don’t get worse”
Your body relaxes, your eyes softening briefly at him being protective, showing concern for your health before going ridged again.
“I promise I’ll go easy on my shoulder, I just desperately need to get some projects done. Everyone’s counting on me to get it done and open soon.” Your voice sounds strained and pleading like your trying to convince yourself and much as you are him that you believe what your saying.
“Can I at-least walk you there?”
The walk into town was quiet, neither of you saying much. Just the silent sound of you both battling your own inner self doubt.
“You sure you don’t want breakfast?”
“I’m sure….I’m not very hungry” your voice is soft and strained, almost as if your trying to hold back tears.
Joel cups your face pulling your gaze up to meet his.
“You let me know if you need anything sweetheart, can’t have you hurtin’ your shoulder worse.” Joel drawls before leaning in, closing the gap and placing a soft kiss to your lips. You return the kiss briefly as you run your fingers over his patchy beard.
“I promise I’ll go easy on myself”
Joel can’t shake the feeling that somethings wrong. You never skip breakfast because you get very hangry if you don’t eat in the morning.
Did I scare her? Did I move to fast? Did I make her uncomfortable in some way?
It hits Joel like a ton of bricks as he turn onto his street.
Ellie. She’s worried about how Ellie will feel about us. She’s worried it will drive a wedge between her and I or with them.
Joel stops up the steps and frantically grabs his tool bag.
“Your to old to be staying out all night and then doing a terrible job sneaking back in the next morning” Ellie teases behind Joel.
“I gotta do some extra work in the work shop and at the stables but when your done with your green house shift, we need to talk”
Joel’s never had a way with words like most people, he’s never been eloquent speaker. His love language more came in the form of acts of severance or in words of affirmation. He spends the next few hours building a safe sturdy step stool for the saddles, fixing not just Shimmers stable door but all the horses stables doors so none of them had the possibility to stick and tinkering around and fixing up anything he could find.
You stay at the library for several hours trying completely the simplest tasks, but without much success. Your just going through the motions as your mind is a mile away, thinking about Joel.
Resigning to the fact that you were getting nothing done, you decided to go home to take a hot shower to sooth your racing mind.
As the hot water streams over your body and the steam fills your lungs your mind drifts to Joel. You haven’t stopped thinking about how you can still feel his lips on yours. How he makes you feel seen and heard without any judgement what so ever.
Youre heart aches from how deep your feelings for Joel go, even if it feels like you don’t deserve having him in your life. But you need to apologize to him for how abruptly you retreated back into yourself when the feelings felt to real this morning.
Joel’s nursing a glass of whisky when Ellie gets back from her shift at the green house.
“What’s up Joel, everything alright?”
“Yea, nothin’ bad I just, I like someone and wanna talk about it”
“Oh congrats, your getting soft in your old age. Did you finally become friends with your horse”
“Jerk, no I like a woman. I like a woman, I wanna date her. But are you ok with that?”
“Your so bad at this, why are you being so awkward?”
“We’ll Christ, I’ve never done this before, had this kind of talk. I never brought anyone around Sarah. I don’t know what I’m doing”
“Wait… is this about Y/N?”
Joel nods cautiously
“Man you really are dense aren’t you?” Ellie playfully pokes.
“What’s so funny?”
“Joel.. I’ve been trying to set you up with her since we got here. Tommy’s been helping too”
“What? Really? You’re ok with it?”
“You guys are perfect for each other, it’s so obvious you two really care about each other, at least it is too me because I get to spend time with you guys together away from everyone else.”
Joel just stairs at her stunned
“Look I never wanted to admit this because it sounds stupid, but the times when it’s just you, me and her…it’s feels like we’re a family, like I actually have the family I’ve been dying to have my whole life. She got to know us and excepted us the way we are without listening to all the whispers around town and I think that’s fucking beautiful.”
“I gotta go see her”
“I swear to god Joel don’t fuck this up, she’s the happiness we both deserve, but yes, go to her, go right now”
Joels out of the house and down the street before his brain catches up.
Your scrambling around the house trying to get dressed as fast as you can before you get to anxious and decide not to go to Joel’s when you hear a knock at the door.
“The book drop off box is on the porch” you yell down the hall, figuring someone was trying to pick up or drop off books they borrowed since you weren’t at the library. But you hear who ever is is knock again.
“The book pick up is also on the porch” you yell again hoping the person hears you and gets the point,but they do it yet again. Completely flustered at this point you rip your shirt down over you head and pad angrily to the door.
“The book drop off and pick…” you aggressively swing the door open, stoping dead in your tracks at who’s on the other side.
“Joel” you whisper in surprise. All you can do is stare for a few beats to long at how the evening light highlights his already beautiful features.
“Sorry, this a bad time sweetheart?”
“No…sorry I just thought you were someone else”
You immediately pick up on his change In body langue and quickly follow up with “I just thought it was someone trying to pick up or drop off books” you watch as he relaxes right away again.
“I…I um was actually on my way over to your place”
Before either if you know it your smashing together in a kiss like two magnet’s. The kiss is all teeth and tongues, it’s desperate and awkward, messy and beautiful. Your both clutching on to each other like the other might fly away as Joel walks you backwards through the door way as he pushing the door closed with his foot.
As you both pull back for air Joel cradles your face with his large hands, caressing your cheek bones with the rough pads of his thumbs. His deep brown eyes lock with you hazel ones ands it’s as if they rest of the world doesn’t exist, like it’s only the two of you left on earth.
“I’m so sorry about this morning, I wasn’t trying to be weird. I-I I just…I scared myself with everything”
“It’s ok sweetheart” Joel says as he kisses you softly.
“I talked to Ellie, she’s ok with us being a thing. Honestly quiet excited about it”
You’re speechless for a moment, as you eyes start to well with tears.
“Joel, you didn’t have to do that, I’m sorry if you felt like you had too”
“I did have too, because it’s important to me”
“It’s…it’s important to me that you did”
At hearing that Joel lunges forward again capturing your lips in a kiss pulling you flush against his chest. He swallows the gasp that escapes your lips when he takes your bottom lip between his teeth. You snake your arms around his neck tugging the hair at the nape of his neck. The growl that, that action elicits vibrates through your chest.
“Bedroom?” Joel grits out, his deep voice drips with desire mixed with love.
Joel can’t convince himself otherwise any more, he loves you.
“Bedroom” you echo
Joel’s walking you backwards down the hall to your bedroom when he turns slightly pinning you against the wall just outside your bedroom.
“Are you sure about this sweetheart?” He pulls back just enough to lock eyes with you.
You nod your head yes.
“I need to hear you say it sweetheart. I don’t want to push you farther than your comfortable going because i thought it was ok.”
“I’m sure about this Joel, I want it…I want you”
Joel let’s out a low groan as he attaches his lips to your jaw, nipping his way long it until he reaches that soft spot where your jaw meets your neck. He sucks hard and then soothes the spot with his tongue as his hands sneak inside the hem of your shirt squeezing your plush sides. This earns him another tug at his hair as you let out a whimper. Joel’s head spins from how breathless you are already for him and he hopes you can tell how breathless he is for you.
Joel rips his shirt off at the feeling of you raking your hands up and down his chest. He’s been touched starved for so long that the desperate need for your touch, to feel your skin on his takes over.
Most people wouldn’t describe Joel as beautiful, but you always found him to be. You thought as you took in the sight of him shirtless.
Joel watches you nervously as you trace over old scars on his chest. He’s afraid you’ll want to run and hide from him bearing his soul to you in a way he never has or ever wanted too. But the moment you press your lips to the scars on his chest this worry melts away. You pepper every scar you can see across his chest, arms and shoulders with kisses before you make your way to his neck. You sneak your hands around him to slide them up his back as you reach his ear.
“Every part of you is beautiful” you whisper as you kiss along his jaw.
Joel feels dizzy from your words as your lips make it back to his. Never in his life has anyone ever called him beautiful much less been this tender and sensual with him. He can’t get enough, as he grabs at your waist again. Pulling you tightly to him as he presses you firmly again the wall causing your shirt to ride up.
“It’s ok… you can take it off” you breath
Joel wastes no time ripping your shirt up over your head.
“Your so fuckin’ gorgeous” he growls as you arch into him so he can unhook your bra.
You let the straps slide down your arms until it falls to the floor between the two of you. You’re mind goes blank from Joel’s intense gaze. Slowly he slides his hands up your torso to your breasts. They barely even touched you and your nipples are already hardened peaks. The sensation of him rolling them beneath his slightly calloused thumbs as he’s squeezing your breasts hits you hard. Your eyes flutter shut as your head falls back against the wall, if your not carful you might just climax from this alone.
“Fuck…your skins so soft” Joel growls as he pulls you away from the wall and into your bedroom, not stopping until your legs hit the end of your bed.
His eyes burn right through you as you slid your pants down, leaving yourself in just your panties as you climb on the bed.
The two of you hold each others gaze for a few beats as Joel undoes his belt and steps out of his pants. You instinctually spread your legs to make room for him as the bed dips down. He doesn’t care how long he has to draw this out, Joel’s not stopping until he’s explored every inch of your body. Making you feel like the goddess that he sees you as.
Your eyes flicker from his eyes to his hard outline straining his boxers and back to his eyes. The way he playfully smirks at you makes you realize just how exposed you are to him, making you start to wrap your arms around your body to cover yourself.
“You ok sweetheart?” Joel asks rubbing circles into your thighs.
“Do you want me to cover up some?”
“What?”
“Wait why would I want you to cover up?” He half huffs, confused
“Im not the skinniest…I don’t look as good as you”
Joel hates the idea that someone(s) made you feel like you weren’t worthy because your body isn’t their ideal body. He’s loves your curves, the plushness of your skin.
“Everything about you is gorgeous, and if it s’ok id like to show you just how gorgeous I think you are.”
You frantically nod and with that Joel dips his body down kissing right above your clothed clit, pulling a whimper out of you. He then moves to your hips, kissing them both before kissing all the way up your stomach til he reaches your breasts.
He licks along the swell of your breast, pulling your peaked nipple in between his teeth as he palms the other one with his free hand. Then does the same to the other.
“So fuckin’ sexy” Joel whispers against your breast as he swings his leg over to straddle one of your legs.
He crashes forward, his rock hard bulge pressing into your hip to capture your lips in a passionate kiss. Your hands automatically plant firmly in his hair as his tongue dances with yours. Making his way down your neck sucking the soft skin where your shoulder meets your neck between his teeth, then sooth it with his tongue. You know it’s going to leave a mark, you want it too. Even if this is just for tonight, you want Joel to mark you as his. But you had no idea how much he wants that too. To make you his.
Joel plunges his tongue back into your mouth as he dips his free hand where you need it most. His finger grazes your clit has he slips it through your slit, deep into your core with a audible squelch. You both swallow each others moans.
A breathy moan escapes your lips as he gathers some of your wetness to your swollen clit with tight circles.
“Christ baby…y’so wet. This all from me?” Joel breathes, as you pull back. He wants to see the pleasure he’s giving you.
“All day…a-always” you breath unable to get more out.
“Fuck” Joel groans as he pulls down your panties, seating himself back between your legs.
“Fuck..baby you feel s’good around my fingers”
Joel’s trusts his fingers in and out of you at a steady pace.
“J-Joel…it’s feels s-s good” you say through a stifled whimper.
“Don’t hold back baby. Lemme hear ya. Wanna hear how good I make you feel.” Joel purrs as he’s stroking that soft spongy spot so well.
Your climax crashes over you like a wave against a rocky coast. You couldn’t stop even if you tried.
“Fuu- J-Joel…it feels so good”
“Thats it baby let go”
You clench around his fingers perfectly as you fall over the edge.
“Doin’ so good for me sweetheart. Soundin’ so beautiful.”
Joel leaves a trail of kisses and praise in the valley between your breasts and down your stomach.
“Can I taste you sweetheart?” He growls as he nips at the insides of your thighs. Pupils blows wide open when you lock eyes with him.
“Please” you whine
Joel gives a few kitten licks up your center to watch you squirm, then dives in like a starved man eating his last meal. You thrusted your hips forward grinding into his face desperately chasing anything he’ll give you. Joel’s harder than he’s ever been before, head dripping with pre-come at the feeling of you grinding on his face to chase your release.
He’d give you this every single day if you’d let him. He doesn’t even care about his own release. He could drown in between your legs and die a happy man seeing the pleasure he gives you from his tongue on your face.
Tag List:
@vee-bees-blog @vie-is-punk @musings-of-a-rose-writes @iamsherlocked-1998 @frecklefacelm @thatoneobsessedlinguist-writes @alyhull @sj66 @merci-killing @whenmondaycomes @ellishamae25 @romabloo @jennaispunk @elizabeth4th @runningmom94 @closetedconsumer @alongfortheridereader @thegingerlily @starlite41 @sirensheartbeat-blog @pedropascalfan221 @vivian-pascal @mads198-9 @f1shb0nez @almodovarispunk @pedroslittlelady @collection-of-fucking-chaos
@megjohnston23 @pascalispunks-blog @skully-skeleton-bone0106
@peanutweanut @joelalorian @mssalmighty @mountainsandmayhem @zipp7201 @folkloreandfall @steadydragongalaxy @ceceliamariee @starrynight57-blog
@nahchiefimgood @i-love-taylor @hc-geralt-23
@hopelessromantic727 @casispunk @ctrlaltdel3te @drewharrisonwriter @teddyitalia @mexicanfolklore
@enchantingfireduck @thatwierdgirlmaddi-blog @art-estrange
@chiefevelyn @niallsblckgirlfriend @unnecesarysstuff @horses1012ans @morgaussy @jellybeanxc @stxory @lavenderallergy8 @sj66 @spacecowgirl1111 @tupelomiss @hauntedpoetsdepartment @aromanticfever @regalwhovianbrowncoat774 @sweetperfectioncloud
@honeymarvel @samarav @is-being-ignored-a-hobby @elliaze @kjo770 @rav3n-pascal22 22
#the last of us#joel miller#pedro pascal#fanfic#joel miller x reader#neurodivergent#joel miller x f!reader#adhd#joel the last of us#joel tlou#ellie williams
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Did you guys know this existed?!!?!
@g1rlr0b1n just showed me this comic “The Multiversity: The Just” where in a story Damian is Batman and “Chris Kent” is Superman.
btw, world's finest bromance is crazy???
Which I’m like, okay, Chris took the mantle instead of Jon but then like
The heart thing immediately throws me off, right? Cause how dare he steal Jon’s thing but like
The wiki says that Chris is Damian’s best friend so where is Jon? And why does Chris exist still to be Superman?
The wiki says that this Chris Kent is Clark’s biological son which makes no sense because as we know, Chris is adopted, he’s not biologically related to Clark but this Chris also takes a lot of his features. Which would leave one to believe that this Chris Kent is just Jon with a different name.
Also please note that this was created in 2014 but Jon was created in 2015 so this kind of confirms that this is literally just Jon Kent.
I can’t get over how annoyingly jealous this Jon is over Damian having a girlfriend. It’s actually insane.
He’s always on his ass about her it's kinda funny. It’s the only thing they’ve been talking about.
Albeit she might be evil so perhaps that's why Jon is being like this, but he says that it's all of them regardless.
It's ridiculous actually, Jon is irrationally jealous, that's the only thing I can think of because that's all their conversations are fueled by.
Then Damian’s love interest for this book says this…? Like the way this is worded is insane?
I'm going insane over finding this comic book, guys please go insane with me because I had no idea this existed.
edit:
Why is he dating her based off all the things he thinks batman would like?
DAMIAN HIDING HER IN THE CLOSET WHEN JON COMES BY LMAOOOO
IM CRYING BECAUSE THIS DOESNT FEEL REAL??? IT GETS WORSE?
MORRISON WROTE THIS? WHAT IS THIS??
In conclusion, them loving each other BEFORE THE OTHER PERSON LITERALLY EXISTS is crazy. THERES NO SUBEXT EVEN! ITS LIKE IN YOUR FACE. what type of lost media have i found, im crying
#jondami#damijon#cosmicbird#superdemon#damian wayne#super sons#jon kent#supersons#jonathan kent#dc comics#superman#batman
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oh, wait, i've had another thought, hear me out:
AU where tommy never left the 118 and buck never joined the LAFD but maddie still joined dispatch and met chimney during a call, and started hanging out with him like back in S2.
fast forward to maddie bringing buck to a 118 family barbecue and buck instantly clicking with everyone and making friends left and right. he's drinking beers and talking with eddie and tommy when he notices maddie and chim doing their little flirting but not flirting dance and tommy's like "they're always doing that. howie will not stop talking about her but he won't ask her out" and buck starts sharing stories about them dancing around each other and their buffridays and karaoke duets and because they're both hopeless romantics living vicariously through madney they come up with a plan to get them together
cue tommy and buck coming up with ways to set up chim and maddie on date like activities with them as wingmen. they go to the movies and dinner, have an entire day at the santa monica pier, hangout during trivia night at tommy's favourite bar, buck books all four of them a tour and farm-to-table lunch at a vineyard and winery, tommy even flies them all out to vegas for a weekend. and obviously through it all tommy and buck start to know each other more and more and start liking hanging out with each other
they keep coming up with these romantic ideas to finally get chimney and maddie to realise they've been dating this whole time and don't realise (or pretend they don't) that it's looking more and more like double dates and that they're the ones using madney as wingmen because they're too nervous to actually admit they're doing it more for them than for maddie and chim at this point
until one day maddie and chimney go on an actual date of their own without meddling little brothers and best friends and start dating for real and now buck and tommy realise that oh, actually they started catching feelings for each other and don't know what they're supposed to do now that they don't have an excuse to go on elaborate double dates and now it's maddie and chim's turn to get them to accept they had been dating the whole time and they have feelings for each other
#if i were capable of writing humour or anything that's not at least a little bit angsty I'd write it#but i'm not very good with romcom like stories so if this post sparks joy and inspiration this is my blanket permission to write it#911#bucktommy#tv:911#ship:bucktommy#//hayden#//mine
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mariona's statement during her press conference. (it's so emotional 🥹)
"good afternoon. first of all, thank you all so much for being here. before starting the press conference i would like to make a short summary of what it has been for me. being part of the club of my life. those of you who know me know that my first football memories are all related to barça. the first blaugrana shirt, ronaldinho's first boots, the first trips with the family to visit camp nou, the first matches on TV, those of barça. looking back, i realize how lucky i was that my father instilled this in me from a very young age, which means loving a club and admiring the colours. and how lucky to be able to say out loud that i have always been, am and will always be a culer.
"when i was 18 years old and had the option to come here, the decision was made on my own. i still remember that day and what o heard that girl who had grown up being a barça fan, the one who screamed and jumped when they scored goals and the one who cried and got angry when they lost, she had before her the opportunity of her life to wear the blaugrana shirt, but this time an official one with her name on it. and this dream, when it came true the first moment i set foot in the ciutat esportiva, was wonderful. after ten years i leave feeling even culer than i was before, if that is possible and we feel privileged to have been part of the best team in the world.
"the truth is that i couldn't describe in words what barça means to me, and that's why you can imagine how difficult it was to make the decision to leave. barça is my life and barça has changed my life. that is why i wanted to take advantage of this moment to dedicate a few words to those who have been part of this path in the first place, the president and the board of directors. you have made all this possible with a firm and real commitment to women's football and to us. without you this story would be totally different. you have given us the tools to develop as professionals and you have given me the best gift of being able to play at camp nou, my family, my mother and my brother, my godmother, my aunts and uncles cousins you have followed me every step of the way and have always shown me your unconditional support. i know you've enjoyed this stage as much as i have and you've been a huge part of it all.
to you, dad, who was the one who took me up and down when i played in amateur fields. i wouldn't know how to explain to you that i have managed to win three champions leagues with your beloved barça and play in front of a camp nou. i wish i didn't have to leave so early because i know you would have enjoyed it more than anything. but what has marked ends and for every title raised i promise you that you have been there, because this has always been our dream and that is why i hope that, wherever you are right now, you will be very proud of me.
to my friends for loving me and helping me and always being by my side, to the technical staff, i thought you were crazy about football, but yours is worth studying. you have made me love this sport even more and you have passed on your passion to me. no one had ever told me about bases and squares, chains or body orientation. i am the player i am today because of you. you have taught me so much and made me believe in myself. i hope that despite the training tantrums, you are aware of how much i respect and admire you. and i would like to take this opportunity to thank you for the trust you have placed in me, along with the other members of the coaching staff and club workers. you are many and very important. your work is more invisible, but do you know that you are essential to us.
to the press and the fans. thank you for embracing us and pushing us as you have. and finally, to the most important ones, to my colleagues. sharing this adventure with you has been the best part. no one but us can imagine the effort we have put in, nor the sacrifice we have made to get to where we are. we all know it has not been easy, but it has been worth it because we are a unique team. you have made me proud to be part of this historic group, and not only for all the sporting achievements, but for all the social impact we have achieved and the image we have given to the whole world. It's not just wins, but how we won. that's why i can only thank you for making me enjoy football and for making me a better player. we will miss you very much. but i will always follow closely and celebrate your successes as my own. i wish you the best and hopefully football or life will offer us a reunion. i would also like to make a special mention to Xavi Llorens for giving me the opportunity to come here and marc for making such a farewell possible, they are always in good tune, despite the difficulty and pressure of the last few months. with my hand on my heart. i just have to thank you again. i am proud and happy to be a part of this great family. visca el barça now and forever."
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i would like to hear your take on how the romanceable male companions would react to a teifling partner doing things like purring when around him, or wrapping their tail around his ankle when close to him.
Thank you so much for this request! Sorry it took a bit to get this out! I love teiflings so it only makes sense that I do this prompt at some point! This one may be a tad shorter than my usually ones, last bullet point is NSFW as always. Hope you enjoy!
Wyll
You both had been drinking and chatting late at night by the fire. You were feeling the drinks more than he was. The night has been the definition of perfection, you and Wyll swapping stories, maybe a few long glances…some lingering touches… As the night is getting later and the tiredness tries to consume you, but you're enjoying this so much…you don't want it to end… Wyll is getting done telling you another one of his valent stories, and that's when sleep decides to take you. Letting out a chuckle, you can't help but settle your tired head on his shoulder. Wyll feels his heartbeat race and confidence build from the liquid courage; it's the perfect opportunity to put himself out there, to make his feelings known. As he is about to ask if he can kiss you, he feels and hears a soft rumbling. Looking down at you, he sees you fast asleep, a smile on your lips, purring as you drift along to whatever is in your dream. Wyll adjusts slowly for you both to sit in a more comfortable position, your head resting on his chest with his arm wrapped around you, carefully brushing his fingertips along your arm, wanting not to disturb you. It truly was the perfect night.
You're not one for dancing… but you are a fan of Wyll, so when he asked you to dance, you said yes without a second thought. Wyll led you through the dance to the best of his ability; he even managed to smile through you accidentally stepping on his foot multiple times. Slowly, you two managed to find your rhythm with each other. You started to feel more and more relaxed as the dance went on…till you started to hear groans and muttered, 'Excuse me,' That's when you noticed your damn tail was getting in the way as you swayed to the music, causing you to end up smacking it's against other couples on the floor. You quickly apologize and wrap your tail around your leg to continue your dance with Wyll. You look at Wyll, who is glaring at the person daring to say anything to you when his face looks surprised as he looks at you with a blush rising to his cheeks. You're confused until you feel it; in embarrassment, you wrapped your tail around the wrong leg…it was now tightly wound around Wylls. Completely mortified, you apologize and undo your appendage, but before you can, Wyll is pressing you closer, whispering in your ear, "Please.. don't move it…I enjoy feeling so close to you…" Biting your lip, trying not to scream in excitement, you keep your tail around his leg for the rest of the night per his request.
You wanted to be careful…but you're finding it hard…Wyll just keeps bouncing you harder, making you take his cock deeper. The ridges slide perfectly against your aching walls, and you feel made for each other. Wyll smiles at your face so beautifully contoured as you get closer and closer to the edge of your next orgasm. Your sharp nails digging into his broad shoulders, so close to drawing blood. Wyll starts lifting your ass higher, his strength making it easy for him as he buckles his hips faster into you at a mind-shattering pace. You've already made a mess of his lap, but he's eager for more, and now your nails are fully dug into his shoulders… you're whimpering out an apology, but he keeps going harder. He acts like an angelic prince in the streets, but in the sheets, he fucks like a devil…
Gale
Gale is always an attentive partner and is always filled with surprises. Since you met him on your journey, he has been interested in learning more about you and your people. It was flattering; even though he was human, his eyes never looked at you with judgment or fear like others. Gale wanted to understand you, to be more connected to you. You couldn't imagine feeling more connected to your partner, but it's just like Gale to strive for more, ambition and all that… So the day he came up to you with a wide smile, you knew he had a surprise for you. Your tail sways excitedly, seeing the mischief in his eyes, "Is there a reason you are smiling so wide?" Gale grins before he speaks. His accent is perfectly deep, and his lips sound like pure velvet. He had been studying how to speak infernal with you, and from how he was expertly nailing the dialect, you remember that his tongue is… well practiced in more ways than one; of course, he would learn a language quickly. The way the slight growl rumbles in his chest makes you purr without you even noticing. Satisfied with himself, Gale kisses your cheek and then walks away to his study. Wizards…always so cocky…
Gale had asked you to play a game of lance board with him; the loser has to make dinner…and you are not very good at lance board despite all your best efforts to get better. You couldn't beat the damn prodigy you so happen to be dating. Now here you are, Gale, very clearly kicking your ass as you try to rack your brain for a plan, but despite your best efforts, you keep drawing a blank. Eyebrows furrowed, sharp teeth biting your bottom lip, Gale thinks he could sit here forever watching you so lost in concentration; despite your best efforts, you still haven't beaten him. Gale could offer you advice, but he would miss seeing your cute face curled in concentration like this. As he bites his tongue, resisting the urge to help you, he feels something curling around his ankle. Looking down, he sees you're so lost in thought you're unconsciously clinging to him. Gale feels his heart squeeze as he falls even more in love with you. The night ends with Gale cooking your favorite over the stove; he might have thrown the game…, but though he lost, he still feels like the winner as you do your goofy victory dance, then wrap him in a huge hug. Maybe he should lose at lanceboard more often?
His pace is relentless…you blame the lack of companionship in the flesh for some time. Sure astral projection is fun, but there's something about a cock being slammed into you repeatedly that just can't be beaten… Gale keeps whispering praises under his breath then you feel his scratchy beard on your sensitive vestigial wings, soft lips kissing and sucking softly as his hips keep slapping into you over and over. You're getting overly sensitive by the minute. You try moving to adjust, but it's useless as Gale's hands hold onto you tighter. A loud moan leaves you as you feel a mage hand teasing your sex as his lips stay to your back; okay…maybe some projections are okay.
Astarion
You have just finished your bath in the river, and now it is time to brush out your unruly hair. As you're about to tackle the challenge, you hear your tent's flap opening; turning around, you see Astarion with an unusually timid smile. "Already time for a feeding Star?" Astarion chuckles before responding, "No, no, darling, I just…um…could I help you with that?" He points to your comb. First, you're confused because he's usually not the selfless helping type, but you could always use the help with your hair. "Be gentle," you warn with a smirk, holding the comb out towards him. Astarion takes it and starts working on your hair; at first, it hurts slightly as he tugs through the knots, but he quickly changes methods by running the comb and his cool fingers through your hair in sections. Soon, you found he was brushing through your hair smoothly, done with the job but continuing the sweet, calming gesture. You lose yourself in it; then, a pur starts in your throat. As soon as you hear it, you try to stop feeling embarrassed, but Astarion, instead of teasing you, just whispers in your ear, "Just enjoy it darling…let yourself relax…" With that, you purr as the blush fills your cheeks, and Astarion continues brushing. You are smiling at the sound.
You were having the time of your life at the tavern, feeling so lucky to be around your amazing friends without a single care. You had one too many and were currently enthralled by a story Astarion was telling you. You enjoyed being around Astarion, and it wasn't just because he was easy on the eyes, either. Astarion is smart and funny. Plus, you found he cared about you from how he talked to you when he didn't think the others were listening. He is so wonderful, and right now, in your tipsy state, all you want to do is express how much you appreciate him. So once he finishes his story, and you both share a laugh, you take a moment before you wrap your tail around his ankle; Astarion looks at you confused, and that's when you say what's been on your mind all night. "I appreciate you s-so much Star, I hope you know what you mean to me." Astarion looks at you, shocked for a moment, before he smiles and pats your hazy head, "I know darling…thank you." he pauses for a moment before he finally confesses what's been on his mind all night, "You mean a lot to me too…"
Astarion has always had the problem of keeping his mouth off you…but today, it seems downright impossible. After feeding from you, his lingering didn't stop. Astarion kept his hands on your body, exploring every curve and bump with his fingertips. His lips and fangs trace over your neck as your body presses itself closer to him. Astarions hands start slowly teasing your aching sex as his tongue traces over your ridges. He's mumbling endlessly about your smell and your addictive taste. Right now, he's full, but maybe he will fuck you until he builds up an appetite.
Halsin
You have felt sore lately, and no matter how much you try to ease your body, you can't get this soreness to leave. After trying everything you could think of, you decided it was time to visit your favorite druid for healing. After meeting in Halsins tent, he examines you before explaining that he doesn't have a spell to heal your soreness, but you can try a massage. He offers assistance, and you would be a fool to pass up. Now, with your top off, lying face down in his fur-covered bedroll, his massive hands are working his magic to relieve your knots. The experience is so blissful you start to purr. As soon as you start, you stop apologizing, but Halsin chuckles, saying he likes it, "sounds pretty when you're enjoying yourself." his hands rub down your lower back, applying more pressure, making you bite back and moan. "I hope I get to hear more of it sometime."
Of course, you and your companions have been invited to another grand party in the city; everyone was excited to attend, and even Halsin was excited to participate despite him not being a fan of the city. "A chance to spend more time with you? I would be a fool to refuse." his words stirred your heart; Halsin always said sweet things to you like that. You knew he liked you, and you, of course, liked him too, but Halsin was waiting for you to get over your shyness and take your relationship to the next level…but of course, your nerves kept getting in the way of what could be a blooming romance. Tonight, you plan to change all that! It had been so good that you two had been laughing and flirting all night, and now it was time to initiate some physical contact…maybe something small… like a simple handhold. As you stand next to him, his hand at his side, it's the perfect opportunity…you go to reach for it, but then the slight adjusting of his stance makes you quickly retreat… then closing your eyes, you move your tail to barely be wrapped around his ankle. You wait a long moment before opening your eyes, your face feeling like its on fire. Then you look up at Halsin, his hazel eyes on you with the sweetest smile. You coil your tail a little tighter and step closer…
Halsin watches with practical stars in his eyes. You're gasping moans as you throw your head back with every roll of your hips on his massive cock. So deep…so filling…so perfect. "Cum." you mutter in your lust. Halsin can't seem to register your words from the utter bliss he feels from your walls, constricting his cock so perfectly. You grab his face, your eyes filled with burning lust as you repeat your demand, "Fill me up…cum in me, Halsin." Gods, how could he ever deny you? With a bruising grip on your hips and a rumbling growl from his chest, you feel that hot seed splashing against your walls. His cock throbs as he coats your insides with his seed. Fuck… he's perfect, your excellent mate trying so hard to make you full…before you can think, you're leaning down, plunging your sharp teeth into his shoulder. The indents from your mating mark will last days, and he can't wait to show off proudly.
Rolan
While you are not properly dating, you two are always ending up in rather intimate situations. Like now, you two are sitting together on the couch next to the fireplace, sharing a book (you had insisted you two share). Your head on his chest as you absentmindedly play with the ends of his hair. At the same time, he tries to keep steady hands as you two read in silence. It's all so intimate and comforting that he can't help it when his body lets out a pur, closing his eyes and leaning into you more. Right as he realizes how intimate that is and how this is the first time he has cuddled you back and, worse, purred in front of you, he gets embarrassed. Rolan is ready to apologize, but before he can grab him, press his head to your chest and let him listen to your purring chest. Rolans pur starts back up, and he nuzzles and wraps his arms around you; you hug him back burying your nose in his soft hair and taking in his scent; you two forget your book, opting for the purring cuddle session instead. One of you may need to ask the other out already.
Rolan hates the busy morning markets, but when you asked him to join you, he found that he just couldn't tell you no. Cal and Lia tell him you seem to be his only weakness; imagine if you two dated…Rolan shakes away the daydream of being completely whipped partner for you. As you two walk through the crowded market, he can't help but smile as you seem so excited by everything. After everything you two have been through, he's happy to see you enjoying yourself, and he plans to buy you at least one thing you pick out as a surprise. So, as he is picking up the pouch you have been admiring, he turns to you to find you gone. Rolan immediately goes into panic mode, calling your name and looking through the crowd for you when he feels something winding around his tail; turning around, he sees you smiling with two meat skewers and an apology from your perfect lips. Rolan can't help himself from grabbing you in a tight embrace, telling you not to scare him like that again. The meat skewers almost drop from your hands from his sudden hug, but you don't care; you wrap your arms around him and whisper a thousand apologies. For the rest of the morning, you two enjoy eating your food, looking at the different pop-up shops, your tails perfectly intertwined… it's almost like you two are a couple already…
It was inevitable that this would happen… it's just in your nature for this to happen…you and Rolan had been so careful, but today, your instincts got the better of you two… Rolan's sweaty body glistened as he kept ramming his cock in deeper and deeper, the feeling of his tail wrapped around yours…his musk blending with the mouth-watering scent of sex, sending you over the edge. When you feel the swelling at the base of his cock. You're supposed to let him pull out and let it coat your stomach…, but today, you kept your legs locked and wrapped around his waist as he lost himself rutting into you. Rolan arches your hips up as he continues to growl, his thrust getting sloppier and shallower as his cock swells, so determined to breed you. The stretch is so sweetly painful and right as he locks his cum spurts out, coating your burning hot walls with the soothing seed. Rolans, still steadying his breaths, he stays buried in you. He smiles shyly, apologizing for losing control and locking you two together. You pull him down to press his full weight on you, not caring how long you two will remain stuck together; you love being with him.
Haarlep
They wouldn't stop their teasing… sense the moment you meet them, Haarlep was determined to hear you purr. They stated it was their hobby to make powerful creatures purr for them. They must have heard a lot about you from Raphael's irritated ramblings of you. However, there is a complement to you from them calling you strong. As you were sitting waiting to conduct business with the master of the house, Haarlep was practically in your lap, cooing and begging to hear that sweet pur. Finally, you had enough and figured to do it quickly and be done with the embarrassing noise. Haarlep leans in their head so close to your chest when they hear the soft thrumming; Harrlep eyes get wide, and so does their smile. From all the purs they have listened to, yours was…so beautiful…As you sit, your face is a bright shade of blush. You try to avoid eye contact when you hear a chuckling and loud laughter. Feeling self-conscious, you push the incubus away, but before they can fall away from you, they catch themselves by your wrist. Their eyes are of a predator…but there is something else in them. "No more purring for you." you pout, which causes Haarlep to laugh more before sitting back at your side telling you not to be so sensitive to some teasing, "besides, if you don't purr at request, I'm sure I can find ways to rip that sweet sound from your throat." you do your best to ignore the taunts that make your stomach do flips; completely unaware of the fact that Haarlep would be tagging along with you a lot more after your bloody meeting with Raphael. Incubuses need to feed, and you were just too delicious to ignore.
You were passed out, and Haarlep was not too happy about it. They watched you with their tail thumping against the bed in irritation. Haarlep hoped you would come back home and want to play; they had been thinking of new ways to get you to purr. You just had to come back home and go straight asleep…how dull…Haarlep watches as your face scrunches up, soft sounds groaning from your lips as you curl further into yourself. A nightmare, huh? Strange…should they leave you? Comfort you? Haarlep thinks about it for a long moment, their orange eyes studying your trembling form… Usually, they just fuck anyone that even seems the slights bit down, it seems to help, but they don't think that would be appreciated for this situation…Haarlep, cares for you? They don't want to lose you or watch you suffer, but feelings from the heart are not something they are used to feeling… it's against their nature. As Haarlep continues to watch you, your closed eyes start to swell up with tears. All they can think of is to reach out and softly rub your head carefully so as not to nudge the base of your horns too much. That's when Haarlep feels something slightly around their ankle; looking down, they see your adorable tail wrapped around them. Haarlep looks at your face, clearly more relaxed now. Haarlep pulls you in closer with a chuckle, holding you close to their warmth. You will never have nightmares with Haarlep around…they won't allow it…they care for you too much? At least, that's how they feel. Is this love?
That tail…Haarlep can't get enough of it… you're so sensitive at the base…your whole body trembling as they lick the underside of it, Haarleps two fingers moving in and out of your tight ass. Fingers fill you up, and you're hardly able to keep yourself standing. Right as you're about to reach your orgasm, Haarleps another hand cruelly yanks on your tail, the pain pulling you from your pleasure for a mere moment as they continue to edge you. Tears run down your cheeks as you cry to cum your tail curling around their arm, Haarleps tail intertwined with yours as their forked tongue licks your tail's ridges before they move down to bite your ass, making you squeeze their fingers more. Haarlep will let you cum…when they're done playing.
#bg3#baldurs gate 3#baldur's gate 3#BG3#bg3 fanfic#bg3 fanfiction#bg3 headcannons#bg3 headcanons#bg3 smut#bg3 fluff#baldursgate#baldur's gate fic#baldur's gate 3 smut#baldur's gate 3 fanfiction#baldur's gate 3 x reader#bg3 x tav#bg3 x you#bg3 x reader#bg3 wyll#bg3 gale#bg3 astarion#bg3 halsin#bg3 rolan#bg3 haarlep#wyll x reader#gale x reader#astarion x reader#halsin x reader#rolan x reader#haarlep x reader
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Straw hats with a member/ S/o who still sleeps with plushies.
A/n: so I’ve been gone for almost 2 months but shhh I got some motivation now😼😼. PLUS I got this inspo from reading something somewhere. SO TY FOR GIVING ME THE THINGY TO WRITE AGAIN.
request=open
requested: <yes> <no>
wc:970
ft: the straw hats (excluding chopper)
warning: ??
⭑Luffy honestly wouldn’t care. If he ever crashes into your room (girls' room) and sleeps on your bed, he’d even shove the stuff toys away.
⭑When he sees your pouting/sad face he’d be clueless and continue whining for you to hop on the bed with him.
⭑When you finally told him why you were mad, he just tilted his head and let out a LONG sigh
⭑Would use his gum-gum abilities and get all your stuffy back in the bed (while groaning. He does NOT want to share)
⭑Speaking of sharing, why coddle a plushie when you have Luffy? Would def get jealous and maybe even tear one of them.
⭑P.s. He did…
⭑Zoro, just like Luffy, couldn’t be bothered. He’d probably think of it as a design at first. I mean, a pirate sleeping with plushies??? That’s rare
⭑But as the creator said, everyone in the crew is a weird person. So, here you are—in your room. Shock and in awe.
⭑Believe it or not, Zoro was sleeping with one of your plushies (that looked like a reindeer…)
⭑He had always denied sleeping next/with them. (Only if you convinced him enough, he’d let out a groan but still follow)
⭑You’d have to tease him about it now. I mean, Zoro sleeping before you??? Shocking with that 3 hrs sleep schedule.
⭑And a certain chef might’ve heard what you’ve said and used it against a certain swordsman…
⭑Nami, would even tax the poor plushies:~((
⭑Jokes aside, she’ll think of it as cute and nice decorations. They’re cuddly, colorful, and good for distress.
⭑But sometimes there’s a limit. She couldn’t even sleep on her OWN bed cuz of how many you got.
⭑Would roll her eyes when she saw you pout and give you a 35% discount.
⭑To help you get “rid” (as she says) of plushies, she’ll take a mini tangerine and place it on her work desk.
⭑Now she talks to it after dinner, drawing the map of the world.
⭑Ussop I’d say would make a story about how he once traveled to a stuffed toy island.
⭑Everything there was colorful, soft, and cuddly! He’d even point at one of your plushies and say he met them on the island!
⭑Your plushie would just stare and stare and stare… Until Ussop had to let out a fake cough and do his other stuff.
⭑He’d ask for your permission to get one of your plushies for support. (You said yes ofc).
⭑Now, whenever he has to modify Nami’s weapon/ whenever he’s alone from the group—he’ll hold the small plushie tightly and hug it, waiting for ideas to pop up.
⭑Sanji the beigest of them all. I could see Sanji:
⭑1) getting jealous about it. You have a whole husband in front of you. And you’re picking the plushie to cuddle…THAN HIM?!
⭑Would give the plushie dirty stares (especially if it was given by someone not him/by his crew)
⭑When you’re doing something else, he’d wrap his arms around your waist and rest his head on your neck.
⭑He’d give the plushie a smirk and laugh a bit. (Nurse gising na po sya)
⭑OR
⭑2) Sanji would write that down in his “All about Y/n!” Notebook and put hearts all over it.
⭑He would give you plushies, and on every island you visit, he insists on getting you at least one stuffed animal.
⭑Would even sculpt one of his foods as your plushie.
⭑Plus he’d get all giddy iddy when he sees you coddling the plushie he bought. It’s really satisfying to see when the person you love appreciates what they give you.
⭑Robin would let out a smile and maybe even tease you (when she's feeling it)
⭑Might get jealous when you're spending more of your time with them. She's your crew member and s/o, you should focus on her!
⭑She once woke up with your back in front of her, and you were cuddling your plushie.
⭑Sad to say you couldn't find your stuffies for a week… :(
⭑But Robin was there for you!
⭑In the end, it was a win-win situation!
⭑FRANKY FOUND IT CUTE CUTE CUTE.
⭑While you were worrying about how he'll react (unknowingly to you, he already found out and named one of them cola jr.) Franky already made a small plushie (robot) that does the SUPEERRRRRRR with him.
⭑When he saw you sad that one of your plushies got teared up, he'd secretly take it and repatch it (w/h metal scraps)
⭑Would sweat when you confronted him about it, and even DENY IT.
⭑"Franky you're the only one I know that'd use metal scraps for repair…"
⭑"Oh."
⭑Brook is a cutie patootie.
⭑He already knows what you like, from the panties you wear to the plushies you like!
⭑Would make one of those and have some delightful little tea parties. If you're too occupied to join in, why not let your mini-version take part instead?
⭑Anyways, if you'd ever show him a soul king merch/plushie. HE'D FLY OVER THE MOONN.
⭑He didn't know they were selling those! Especially when the cane he has can be removed and shown as a knife.
⭑Our good boy Jinbe.
⭑While on his trip, he saw a lot of them. But of course wouldn't bother to buy one.
⭑I mean, you're on a business trip for sake. And a pirate should always be ready and need no time for aesthetics.
⭑Well, that's what he thought BEFORE he met you. When he saw your room he was SHOOK
⭑How did you have time for all of this? How were you gonna sleep? How will you keep them clean?
⭑Many thoughts were roaming in his head. But when he saw your adoring smile, he made up his mind and would do anything to make you happy.
⭑Even keeping your plushies clean.
A/n: I hope you all enjoyed it. nd sorry for the almost 2-month break.
#fypfypfypfypfypfypdypfypfypfypfypfypfyfpfyfpfyp#tumblr fyp#x reader#fluff#one piece#gn reader#one piece live action#luffy x reader#sanji x reader#zoro x reader#ussop x reader#usopp x reader#robin x reader#nami x reader#brook x reader#jinbe x reader#jimbei x reader#Luffy x reader#Sanji x reader#Ussop x reader#Usopp x reader#Zoro x reader#Nami x reader#Jimbei x reader#Jinbei x reader#Robin x reader#franky x reader#Franky x reader#Brook x reader#la!zoro x reader
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patrick has young gf! reader watch his old games with him. pulls her close to him and traces her skin. his hand on her thigh as he prods her about what she's thinking. it starts out innocently enough, asking her how she thought his playing. how he looked during the match. slowly the questions start to lean more towards art - did you like him? did he play better? did you notice how he looked? the questions slowly turn into stories of their past. talks about how big art is, how he taught him how to use it, how to touch himself - just like he did you - and more. gets you all wound up because he needs to see it. needs to see that you'll easily accept art into your orbit once patrick manages to snag him again. he needs to see that you want art as much as he does.
it's the opposite with divorced dilf! art and his girlfriend though. he sees you one day rewatching his old games and is excited to talk about them. usually, he wouldn't want to relive that part of him. losing excitement for tennis over the years due to all the stress but with you it's different. you look at him so earnestly and seem in awe of all his games, even the ones where he can still hear tashi in his head telling him what he did wrong. but it doesn't feel the same when he finds you watching one of patrick and him. jealousy quickly bubbles up inside him as worried thoughts start to come through. what if you think patrick is better? what if you enjoy watching him? what if patrick somehow takes this from him too? so when he sinks beside you on the couch you can see and feel the difference. he's not wearing his usual excited smile, his hand grips your thigh more firmly than usual, and there's a certain look in his eye. he tells you he doesn't want you watching patrick or any of his past games with them. it doesn't take much for you to agree.
-☕(also i am honored to have inspired the post and i do remember the dark days where we had a text limit lol)
its so different because patrick its a turn on - he wants you to tell him how hot you find his friend while your pussy bounces on his dick. "you're so fucking greedy. this pussy just wants dick, huh -" he doesn't consider it a threat at all, knows by the squeeze of your cunt and the way you'd rather drink his cum down than water, you're not going anywhere, so if you want to fantasize about his good ol' buddy back in the day, go ahead. you just have to warm his big cock while you do it.
and art.... well his inadequacy issues are never leaving. though you can't help the way you like the way art fucks you when hes jealous. especially where patrick is concerned - he makes you turn the match off and then he turns you over, bends you over the armrest and pushes in - hard and hot - fucks you like he's punishing you, with thunderous slams of his hips against your ass. hand fisted in your hair, "tell me how much you love this -" there's a hint of desperation behind it, a plead more than a command. its easy to reassure him, moaning your assent, yes you love this, you love him, you love it so much art, you love his fat cock in your little pussy - where patrick is concerned, against his better judgment, art always rises to the competition.
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It’s so funny how you can go almost your entire life not knowing you’re extremely allergic to something to the point of it having the potential to kill you but…you just never encountered it. Until one day you do and it feels like some asspull by a lazy writer who couldn’t figure out how to progress/end the story and then couldn’t be bothered to sprinkle foreshadowing to your demise throughout the narrative.
In my mid 30’s I suddenly learned I’m very allergic to horse-flies. The area where I was bitten swell up to a painful degree, turning hard and red/purple, followed by itching so bad 20 mosquito bites doesn’t compare once the swelling starts to go down. When they bite my legs it’s okay but if I’m ever bitten near my neck I’ll be fucked. I can’t even be touched by the fuckers. One once got stuck under my clothes and I know it didn’t bite me because there were no bite marks but I could see its path across my skin as a painful red line. During the summer months I always carry allergy medicine on me in case I get bitten, sometimes even resorting to just taking a pill every day with all my other medications just to be safe (my doctor told me that’s perfectly okay).
I’ve lived near farm animals most of my life so how I never got bitten by a horse-fly before I turned 30 I’ll never understand but apparently my lazy writer decided now was the time and suddenly they’re the bane of my summers.
A kinda funny example is my housemate who is randomly allergic to pinecones. I’ve been making pinecone syrup where you just leave fresh green pinecones in a glass with sugar until all the sugar has turned liquid from the water in the pinecones and then you boil it to kill harmful bacteria and make the mixture less tangy. I could have potentially poisoned her if she hadn’t been in the room when I boiled it. As I really got the mixture going she suddenly asked “Does your eyes sting too?” I was standing with my face over the pot and told her no, I didn’t feel a thing. And that’s when I immediately knew she was never to taste the syrup because she was clearly having an allergic reaction just from the vapor. She has never had an allergic reaction to anything and there’s a good chance she would have never known pinecones were her weakness if she didn’t end up living with the forage-loving swamp troll that is me.
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𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐦𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩 (𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐦𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩)
the title is a lyric from 'enter sandman' by metallica
𝗥𝘆𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗦𝘂𝗸𝘂𝗻𝗮 𝘅 𝗙𝗲𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗲! 𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 (𝗠𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗻 𝗔𝗨)
(A/N): hello there, lovelies!
before going any further I'd like to tell y'all that this might be turned into a series if I feel like it and if you'd like to see more, pls don't forget to comment and reblog especially. such a thing always has me reading and writing faster and better!
(also this is based on a low key true story - not having an hot neighbor - but me being unable to sleep).
have a nice day!
SUMMARY: there's something sketchy from the apartment beside your own, with a child constantly wailing. when you finally get to confront your neighbor you find that he's tall, big and especially... hot.
«… I am your… neighbor».
«I could have gathered that» he commented grumpily and flashing you a sharp smile.
Shit, his canines were… quite sharp.
You wondered briefly whether he went around ripping people’s throat with those, as dread set in your gut. Maybe he was just a serial killer who used children’s cries to prey upon his victims and you were there - sleep deprived and in a Mermaid Melody pajama - looking death in the face.
«… saw you around».
WARNINGS: suggestive (sukuna makes some sexual jokes to reader), this is just banter, I had such a fun time with them bantering, modern au, afab character, she/her pronouns, pre-relationship, getting together, baby yuji being the fussiest baby ever, slight angst towards yuji's family situation, sukuna is a wrestler.
To say that sleep didn’t come easy to you would be an understatement.
As a light sleeper living in a crappy apartment complex on the middle floor, you were either startled awake by the early morning maintenance work or the crazy lady one floor above you who didn’t understand that she’d have saved up on neighborly glares if she had only finally gotten some hearing aids instead of blasting her TV at full volume either late in the night or early in the morning.
As if this situation wasn’t traumatic enough, somebody moved in the apartment next door and while the previous inhabitants had been students with a poor taste in music and too little money for good alcohol, you were by now sure that the fussiest baby in the whole world had moved in their place.
Everytime you came back home, he’d wail for a few hours - preferably late in the night - till you heard an ushering voice cursing underneath his breath in a clear indication of frustration.
Well, if his father was frustrated, you were ten times more and a bit worried: what could make a child cry so much?
Was it possible that despite the good reputation of the neighbor, somebody a bit… sketchy had moved?
The thought had you shuddering but your common sense was definitely weakened by the lack of sleep you had gotten since the wailing child had moved next door and you thought to confront the situation.
If anything to assure herself that you had at least tried.
You struggled with confrontation although - on the card at least - you were a fully grown adult and such an action would get you so many points with your therapist, although you needed a good pep talk and the reward of a steaming cup of hot cocoa in the morning before you brought yourself to knock on your neighbor’s door at one a.m. in the night.
You heard a curse and thought for a moment to bolt and blame it on the musician a few floors above who’d come late through the night from his ‘concerts’ - a pitiful ensemble of ten people, half of which his family, in a less than proper bar - but you eventually thought to hold your ground.
You were in the right: a few days of crying were normal especially with a younger child but it was by now a few weeks not to talk about the fact that it was past twelve and according to the apartment’s reglementations - which you hadn’t ever read but searched out to assure yourself you’d be in the right - it was by far an infringement of the laws against loud nois…
«What is it?».
You shouldn’t have been so taken aback by the rudeness with which you were greeted as a mountain of a man showed up, opening the door only halfway and regarding you in the - less than flattering - light of the hallway.
You realized only then that maybe showing up in your comfy pajama hadn’t been the best idea but it’d have been weird if you showed up fully clothed for work, wouldn’t it?
«Ahem… good… good morrow…» where was the whole discourse you had rehearsed while staring at the roof of your bedroom while the damned child kept on crying in the room right next to your own.
Or so it seemed.
«… I am your… neighbor».
«I could have gathered that» he commented grumpily and flashing you a sharp smile.
Shit, his canines were… quite sharp.
You wondered briefly whether he went around ripping people’s throat with those, as dread set in your gut. Maybe he was just a serial killer who used children’s cries to prey upon his victims and you were there - sleep deprived and in a Mermaid Melody pajama - looking death in the face.
«… saw you around».
Well, you hadn’t, and you doubted that you wouldn’t have noticed a man that was past six foot, with bright pink hair and a body that had you feeling things, that weren’t just fear and unease.
At least, you’d die horny, you had to admit.
«Oh» you shifted awkwardly thinking that it wasn’t too late to simply move back and pretend such a conversation hadn’t happened.
He might be thinking it was a whole dream when the cries quadrupled in intensity and you inwardly cringed as a buddy headache pressed on your temples.
Still, it had you regaining your strength and determination: this dude might be a serial killer, but you’d have committed a murder if he didn’t quieten the piercing noise.
«… listen, I don’t mean to… prod into your business…».
«Then don’t» he said, crossing his arms over his chest for a brief moment, before his hand went to the handle of his door, obviously intent on closing it «… it’s one a.m. in the late night. Some people do intend to sleep».
The slightly haughty tone - as if you were the one that made it impossible for this entire floor to sleep - was enough to send precaution to the wind as you adjusted your posture and came closer to the threshold of the apartment to block him from closing the door.
«Listen, whoever you are, I fucking need you to send that baby to sleep».
You expected, once your crass words left your mouth, to be at the very least flipped off because if this man seemed true to his own nature - a tatted body and crazy light in his marron eyes - he’d have at the very least cared little about your comment.
Still, it had you feeling lightly although it didn’t help with the noise in the slightest as the cries went further.
And yet, the man didn’t usher you away - nor threaten you - as a slight tired light shone in his eyes while he ducked his head low but for a moment of weakness, pushing his hands from the crossed hold over his chest onto his hips and squaring up, defensively.
«… if only it was that fucking easy».
«I do believe that it can’t be, but…» but had it been you, you’d have tried everything in the book - and on the Internet - to quieten a fussy child, while weeks were passing by and the sole improvement you got was wearing your noise canceling handcuffs throughout your nightly routine «… if I go another night without sleep, I swear that I’ll finally kill that bitch of Mark from accounting».
Although you were sure you might have sounded like a crazy person to anybody else, the man in front of you cackled at your bluntness and you should have definitely taken this as a sign that he wasn’t mentally stable.
«You think you are the only one who hasn’t been sleeping, sweetheart?» oh not the condescending petname that had you lightly clutching your thighs, and hadn’t you been sure that it was a trick of the light, you’d have believed he had noticed it much to your shame «… you don’t fucking live with the little screecher gobling».
«I live right next door and the walls might as well not exist» you protested not wanting to transform this into a pity competition.
«… well, they do exist or things would be funnier».
Had this arrogant asshole had the audacity to check you out?
In your Mermaid Melody pajama?
You were unable to fluster at the intensity of his gaze although you were quick to pout for his further amusement as he added.
«… I know that you won’t believe me, but… I have fucking tried anything. It’s like that fucking goblin has been set into crying mode since birth with no button to switch him off or lower the volume».
Well, if that wasn’t bad news and probably noticing your less than enthusiastic face the potential serial killer shot you a bawdy look:
«Want to have a go at trying to pacify him?».
«Well, it can’t be worse certainly».
You had meant it sarcastically, although again the lack of a filtering system between your brain and mouth due to your sleepy mind was enough was enough that the man grabbed your wrist - much to your protests, although you were aware that you were the soles ones on this floor and you doubted that anybody would have heard you in the floor above as they were all sleeping soundly - and brought you inside, closing the door behind you.
«Hey!» that’s how you died, because you had been a noisy neighbor. It seemed like the start of an Agatha Christie book and that was your sole consolation «… don’t… don’t fucking manhandle me!».
And you were far more startled when he was quick to release you at once as if burned by your genuine fear as he huffed lightly waiting for you to follow him as he set his marron eyes upon you with an hand on his hip, as a bothered mother waiting for her uncollaborative toddler. It definitely felt insulting and it did work in goading you to follow after him as you took notice of a tiny but cozy apartment.
Serial killers weren’t definitely ever what you expected.
«… maybe he needs a woman touch» your neighbor muttered as he came to an halt to a second bedroom - you had passed by his own on the house tour, noticing no dark walls nor altairs to some forgotten divitiny to which you’d be sacrificed later - as he opened it to reveal an actual child sleeping in an appropriate crib with also a fish-shaped lamp holder still lighted up as the child fussed around.
Although that little shit was the reason why you hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep in the past few days, you couldn’t help but feel your heart clench at the sight, as he obviously looked at discomfort and then an idea passed your mind while you turned accusingly towards your neighbor:
«Did you… did you kidnap him?».
It was the sole solution, although you did notice that the baby and him shared the same soft tuft of pink hair.
«What?!» he seemed so offended that you thought you’d be pushed out of the house with a single shove «Fuck no!».
«That’s what a kidnapper would say!».
«If I had to actually kidnap a child, it wouldn’t be the one that can’t keep his mouth shut» well, that wasn’t ominous in the slightest although the man’s quiet rage turned into something different as he passed an hand on the back of his head as if to pacify himself «… it’s my brother’s child. His wife is… she is not doing well… gave birth to the child and is now in the hospital. He’s staying with her and he, obviously, had me babysit it!«.
«That’s now an ‘it’» you felt offense on the child’s part «… that’s your nephew!».
«Tomato, tomato» your neighbor promptly shot back «… alright, want to have a go or are you just satisfied with having cleared up that I am not a child kidnapper?».
«The jury is still out on that one» you humored him although you did believe this weird stranger with arms that could easily choke you was the child’s nephew since as the baby was within your sight you could see the similarities «… can I… can I pick him up?».
Although he might not be a kidnapper, you still thought it’d be rude to pick up the sweet child - when he wasn’t busy wailing he was quite cute - without the adult’s consent, although you received a simple grumble of assent as the sole answer and you moved to gently cradle the child in your arms, startled by the sudden realization that you hadn’t ever hold a baby.
Professionally.
Cousins and siblings had been passed around to you but you hadn’t ever taken care of a baby with the closest being when you had babysat a few neighbor children through a date their parents had gone on ‘to save the marriage’.
Code for they were swingers who needed a night out and for their children not to know.
So, you couldn’t help but tense up immediately as you reminded yourself to hold the frail neck, while your eyes shot out to the one of the other adult in the room who didn’t seem to have any sarcastic comments for you especially as the child’s loud waning seemed to become far stiller till it became a soft breath.
«How the fuck…».
«Don’t curse in front of the child» one moment with that child and you were already feeling protective of his scrunched up eyebrows and sweet nose «… and I have no clue! I haven’t ever taken care of children that are so little!».
«… well, for a first-timer you are a miracle worker» the pink haired man commented, as he looked down at his nephew «… he never went under that swiftly».
A moment of silence - an awkward one - passed that you took as your cue to leave and go to your bed now that the little threat had been subdued, thinking that it had been a simple chance. Still, the moment that you made to lay down the baby in the crib it started fussing again and threatened to use his powerful lungs again.
«Shit» you cursed as the other man sent you a slight smirk before mouthing “don’t curse in front of the child” «… what… what are we going to do?».
«You have to hold him still he falls further asleep» well, thank you captain Obvious.
«I can’t» not only your arms would have fallen asleep but eventually the child would have realized that you weren’t… well, you weren’t his mother nor an angel. Or a miracle worker.
«Don’t tell me that you have plans right at…» and he shot a look at his watch «… one and half in the morning on a lovely Tuesday night?».
«Aside from being in my bed and sleeping without a wailing baby?» you shoved back the sarcasm as you also cringed at the realization that already half an hour had passed in what you had perceived as being such a little time «… not really, no. Thank you for asking, though».
«Listen…».
Although he had been but a cocky arrogant asshole, your neighbor finally broke his pretense as he pushed his hands in the hair promptly mushing it all up in an adorable mop that mirrored the one on the child’s head.
They were relatives without a doubt.
«… this is… this is the first time… in days… that he stops crying so… I’d… I’d appreciate it if you could stay… at least half an hour. The morning coffee is onto me».
«I don’t drink coffee» whether it was true or not, you were delighted in his surprised expression although you quickly surrendered to his idea.
Not that you were any eager to spend the time with him, no matter the fact that past the threatening appearance he was quite handsome, in a ruggish way that was simply aided by the fact that he took care of his nephew.
«… but alright. I guess… not that I have much choice».
«If your arms fall asleep, let me know, I’ll switch you for a bit» well, wasn’t he thoughtful and also quickly sufficing you with a chair as you adjusted the child swiftly in your arms to be a bit more comfortable and he hadn’t yet stirred «… by the way… not that this can’t get any more awkward, but I am Ryomen… Sukuna… and this is Yuji, my nephew».
«Lovely to meet you, Yuji» you acknowledged just the child while a light huff of annoyance appeared right on his face «… I am…».
«Nice to meet you, neighbor» it was probably the nicest he had ever been, although the asshole held out his hand quickly daring a look at you holding his nephew as if he expected you to do the two things at once «… saw you around».
«You have already said it, and it doesn’t make you sound any less creepy» you ushered back «… do you make it a habit to lure women into your cave with your cute nephew?».
«Not really» again that shitty smirk that made him at least ten times more attractive «… you are the first one falling for it».
«Haha».
«… in all truth, he is more of a huge cockblock» he went onto adding «… can’t bring women home if he’s all whiny».
«You shouldn’t bring women home at all, with a child!» you were probably the least proper person to give indications about being a parent, still, it felt quite obvious «… please tell me that you have other relatives that can take care of Yuji».
«Obviously if the burden has befallen onto my shoulder it can’t be that way» his grin was slightly more grim and bitter and you did feel a bit guilty at the suggestion «… my grandpa is a bit too tired to raise another child after my brother and me, especially»,
«Can’t blame him».
«And my brother’s wife’s family isn’t that near to Tokyo, so I am forced to take a break from fighting till Kaori gets better or that spineless of Jin gets a grip» he added harshly, as your mind zeroed on a thought.
«You… you fight?» oh that was definitely going to go well.
«Professionally, sweetheart» oh the patronizing petnames how little you had missed them «… you have in front of you one of the best wrestlers in all Japan. Used to be the champion of my category…».
«And then what happened? Broke a leg and that’s your villain origin story?» no way you’d have stroked this man’s ego, although this explained his huge muscles.
«You are a smartass, aren’t you?» he shouted back less amused «… maybe that’s why you get along with the shithead in your hold».
«Would it kill you to be nice to your blood relative?».
«Would it kill you to chill out?» he shot back as you simply regarded him with sarcasm.
«It’s the lack of sleep».
He grimaced letting you have the last laugh.
For the moment.
An awkward silence filled in as you couldn’t help but feel like maybe the banter - and the patronizing pet names - had decidedly been better than the awkwardness that spread especially as Yuji lightly fussed in your arms, turning onto his stomach adorably as he smushed himself into you.
«He tends to sleep a lot on his stomach, like Jin» you were startled by the slight fondness that filled Sukuna’s voice as you saw a tiny bit of affection «… this also means that when he farts and you are nearby to check onto him you get hit by a deathly gas».
«You are downright horrible».
«Ever been farted by a baby?» you shook your head «… then you can’t talk».
«I am holding your baby» and then swiftly realizing what you had said, you added «… I mean… well, I… oh well, I mean your brother’s baby».
Another silence threatened to loom onto the two of you as he begrudgingly spoke again.
«… what… what about you?» and at your confused look he added «… what do you do?».
«Research» you explained briefly unsure whether to give the story of your life to this weird stranger who got you flustered and annoyed «… library systems and such and before you say, I am - indeed - a nerd».
«I was going to ask whether you were a sexy librarian or a regular one considering what I have seen you wearing» you risked jostling poor Yuji at the startle due to his bold words.
«I am a boring librarian» you shut him down promptly, although he had by now noticed your embarrassment and was smirking openly «… and don’t try to make fun of it, full-time nanny».
That got him exasperated.
«… I told Jin it’s only temporary! A few months!».
«Whatever makes you sleep at night» you said without thinking at your words and lightly laughing at them, alongside Sukuna, only realizing right now that throughout this conversation your whole body had relaxed and although Yuji was starting to become heavy in your arms, your hold on him felt… natural.
«By the way» you were startled by the terrifying news that you were starting to fall for this ‘concerned uncle’ facade «… are you sure you never held a child? I… I’d say you are a natural».
«Is that you way of recruiting me as your personal nanny?» you retorted, a bit flustered by the praise.
«I could pay you good» he went onto commenting as you raised an eyebrow.
«I don’t take payment in nature».
«It shows» your ears felt heated as you fixed him an angry glare «… what? Just saying you are so wound up, pretty girl. I wouldn’t be surprised if you just needed…».
«Little ears are listening to us!» you protested promptly, going to gently cover Yuji’s ears «… God, he has no chance with such an uncle».
«I am actually the fun uncle, I’ll have you know!».
And your whole night proceeded like this, and although you were tired, slightly irritated and with a heavy baby - what did Sukuna make him eat? - in your arm, for the first night in weeks you fell asleep right on the chair with your neighbor plucking Yuji from your arms to set him in the crib again.
By now the child had fallen deeply asleep and he didn’t startle.
Neither did you when Sukuna adjusted a blanket around your shoulders as he wasn’t sure whether you’d be able to walk back home although your apartments were one against the other.
And you looked far too peaceful in your slumber, compared to the harshness that marred your features through your verbal spar.
Not that he minded, though. If anything, it was almost… reinvigorating to talk with somebody who could hold up his barbed wire, after having to deal with his nephew for the entirety of the day.
He gently shot Yuji one more look as he went to go to his own bedroom not wishing to startle either of you.“You scored a cute one, nephew��� he muttered amusedly “... can’t believe that this is what I have been brought to do to get a girl’s attention”.
credits for dividers: @/saradika-graphics
#sukuna#sukuna x you#sukuna x reader#sukuna x y/n#sukuna fluff#ryomen sukuna#ryomen sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna x y/n#ryomen sukuna fluff#ryomen#ryomen x you#ryomen x reader#ryomen x y/n#ryomen fluff#sukuna ryomen#sukuna ryomen x you#sukuna ryomen x reader#sukuna ryomen fluff#jjk#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jjk fluff
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Like Bugs in a Rug Chapter 2.5
Bonus Chapter
Previous Chapter
NOTE: Although this bonus chapter could be read by itself, I think it will hit so much harder if you at least read Chapter Two beforehand. Don't remember what happened last? Don't worry about it, this is a series of one shots, so you can basically pick-up and read in whatever order.
Story Summary: Azriel Shadowsinger, mysterious pretty boy extraordinaire himself, was head over heels in love with you for years. Everyone in the room could see it, except for you of course. A series of connected one-shots.
Chapter Word Count: 2,100 Words
Chapter Music Inspo: LMS - Aislinn Davis
(Does this song super relate to the chapter? Not really, but kinda if you squint. I don’t always get to choose what songs inspire me to write, and for whatever reason, this one did it for this chappy.)
XxXx
Azriel’s POV
Azriel didn’t knock. He waltzed into Rhysand’s office with swift authority. In a few long strides he was at Rhysand’s desk before the door had time to drift shut behind him. The small amount of self-restraint Azriel had maintained during his flight to The House of Wind vanished at the sight of the asshole, his fury vibrating with the need for release. He so rarely embraced the part of himself that craved such brutish violence, but as he advanced on Rhysand he tossed his gloves to the floor. He needed to feel this.
Rhysand didn’t have time to fully look up from his task. His pen was still in the middle of scribbling his signature on some paperwork when Azriel leaned over the desk and took a fist full of the front of his tunic into one hand.
He yanked the High Lord up from his chair so hard the fabric made a tearing noise. He drew Rhysand into an awkward half standing, half crouched position, holding fast as he loomed over him. Much to Azriel’s annoyance, Rhysand only seemed mildly taken aback by Azriel’s crass arrival, the bastard was expecting him.
Rhysand’s typical air of nonchalance had never bothered him in the way it did now. It was disgusting, how he could jeopardize something so precious to Azriel, and then chose fucking paperwork over trying to fix it.
He sneered in Rhysand’s face. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
“Hey, hey.” Rhysand tried to straighten, but Azriel didn’t give an inch. Rhysand reached a hand for Azriel’s wrist instead, as if to protect his fancy tunic from ripping further. Azriel fixed Rhysand with a scowl that promised harsh violence if he touched him, so Rhysand let his hand fall.
Maybe the High Lord hadn’t completely lost his mind, had a little self preservation instinct left in him after all.
“Az, I’m going to apologize, you don’t need to do this.”
Don’t need to do this? The cold rage clouding Azriel’s mind said otherwise. He barely registered his blue siphons flashing as his shadows rose up behind him, dangerous and menacing just like him. He pulled Rhysand closer, the thread along the collar of the tunic fraying, their faces now inches apart as he looked down at Rhysand with blatant revulsion.
The scent of your tears lingered in Azriel’s nose like you were still falling apart in his arms. For as long as he lived, Azriel would remember what it felt like to see your confidence and hope flicker like a dying flame when all he could offer you was his embrace. It wasn’t enough, he knew that, and it made him feel so helpless. All Azriel wanted was for you to feel like you belonged here, with the Inner Circle, with him.
And they had made damned good progress too, it was slow, but he could tell that you were warming up to the idea of trusting the Inner Circle. Until this dick went and fucked it all up.
So yeah. He did need to do this.
“I fucked up,” Rhysand rushed out, his violet eyes seemed to take in every twitch of Azriel’s face, reading the unspoken threat for what it was, “I’m not saying I don’t deserve this. I’m saying that I already agree with you, I went too far, and I will apologize.”
Azriel huffed an exhale, nostrils flaring. You’d been so distraught, so emotionally and physically exhausted that you fell asleep a few minutes into the flight to Mor’s apartment. You’d never admitted as much, but he knew you had a bit of a phobia of heights, it’s why he never pressured you to fly with him. He had dreamed of the first time he’d take to the sky with you, planned out each scenario, wondered how you’d look the first time you saw Velaris from above. He’d always imagined your face to be alight with wonder.
If he had any reservation about confronting Rhysand, it vanished by the time he entered Mor’s apartment. You didn’t even stir when he laid you down on Mor’s bed. He considered returning to The House of Wind while you were asleep, but the idea of you waking up here alone kept him rooted to your side. He sat on the bed next to you while he waited for Mor to return home, he knew she would take good care of you, she took her duty as a newly discovered older sister very seriously. He found himself absentmindedly smoothing your mused hair from your face. Using his gloved fingers to wipe away dried tear tracks from your cheeks. He was unable to stop comparing the peaceful expression you wore in your sleep to the heartbreak he’d seen while on the stairs.
The room was silent, but his mind was loud as he spiraled, thoughts fixated on how he'd failed you. Had Rhysand sent him away to Windhaven first thing in the morning on purpose, to set him up for failure? Were there really any rumors of an uprising in the camp? Azriel hadn't found any, and it seemed like a mighty convenient distraction.
By the time Mor arrived home he was visibly seething with no concept of how much time had actually passed while he waited. He barely greeted her, gesturing to your sound asleep form on the bed as he made his exit.
Of course, Azriel was furious on your behalf, but that wasn’t what triggered the bloodlust, not completely. He was supposed to protect you, mind and body, and he failed you so spectacularly. He’d assumed that Rhysand had similar intentions, had fully trusted him to protect you while he was away. He would never be so foolish again, he just hoped that you’d stick around long enough to see that.
What if the damage Rhysand dealt couldn’t be smoothed over by a mere apology.
Studying Rhysand now, he seemed so certain that he could smooth this over. He didn’t seem remotely sorry enough for Azriel’s taste. His free hand clenched into a tight fist, something eerily similar to hatred bubbled in him like acid. If Rhysand didn’t feel guilt or remorse for what he’d done to you, then he certainly didn’t care how his actions impacted him either.
Azriel meet his chosen brother’s beseeching stare with contempt as he spoke, words sharp as they left his lips. “When Feyre was first adjusting to the Night Court, I did everything I could to make her feel comfortable and welcome because one way or the other, I knew she was important to you. That made her important to me too. Well before she became my high lady.”
Something defensive surfaced in Rhysand at the thinly veiled accusation. “Are you implying that I don’t care about my own cousin?”
“No,” Azriel snapped back, “I’m implying that you don’t care about me. How dare you speak to her like that knowing exactly what she means to me.”
Rhysand inhaled sharply through his teeth, fixing Azriel with a stern frown, as if he was the one disappointed in him. “I am the High Lord, Azriel, how many times must I remind you that my duty to my Court has to trump the comfort of those in my Inner Circle? She would have had to face Kier eventually, as you know, he thinks she’s spying on us for him. Was I supposed to risk a civil war because she wasn’t prepared?” Rhysand’s calculating eyes were hard as he paused for a moment, as if considering his next sentence carefully, “Just like how I expect you to make uncomfortable choices for the sake of the Court, I expect her to do what must be done to protect the Court as well. That is what it takes to be a part of my Inner Circle."
At one point, referencing the confrontation with Rhysand after getting caught canoodling with Elain would have sent him over the deep end. That conversation marked the first time he truly questioned the depth of Rhysand’s compassion for those in his Inner Circle. Even if Rhysand had been right in the long run, the cold way in which he handled it did not settle well with Azriel. For the sake of his family, not the Court, he had backed down and buried the resentment he felt towards Rhysand. It had seemed worth it, to see Elain and Lucien so happy, and Azriel was finding his own happiness too.
Again, Azriel’s siphons blazed. Rhysand could walk all over him as much as he liked, he’d lived through worse well before he’d met him. But he wouldn’t let Rhysand treat you like that even again. You deserved so much better, especially from your High Lord. “Being the fucking High Lord does not give you the right to be an asshole. You know she already struggled with feeling out of place among us, you didn’t have to confirm her worst fears to get her to cooperate.”
“I know!” Rhysand snapped, trying a bit harder to pull away from Azriel and straighten to his full height, a warning gleaming in his eyes when Azriel didn't yield. He’d sooner rip the tunic all the way down the front than let Rhysand stand tall right now.
“I knew she would push back,” Rhysand continued, sounding offended. Good. “I knew I would have to be more stern with her than I’ve ever been before. I had a plan, but hadn’t accounted for what her magic would feel like when it went on the offensive. I didn’t know it could go on the offensive, I don’t think she knew she was doing it, she zoned out for about a couple minutes in the middle of the argument, totally unresponsive and just blankly staring at me. I couldn’t penetrate her mental shields at all. Her magic protected her from my own fiercely. I wasn’t ready, and my magic took the bait, I lost control of the situation. I’m going to apologize to her, Az. I’m going to explain myself.”
Azriel searched Rhysand’s face for any sign of deception, growing cross with Nesta and Mor for not mentioning the odd behavior earlier. Tense seconds of silence passed as Azriel processed the new information. Rhysand stayed stock still, unwavering under Azriel’s scrutiny. Jaw clenched, he filed this development under ‘suspicious’. He’d agonize over it when he was thinking clearer.
Exhaling a stressed breath, he unclenched the fist at his side. His other hand remained curled in Rhysand’s tunic, unwilling to release him quite yet.
“If she leaves because of this, I do too.” If Azriel’s intentions shocked Rhysand, the High Lord didn’t show it.
Hoisting Rhysand up until he stood up straight, Azriel made sure to tear the fabric down the front a good couple inches for good measure. “Fix. This. Rhys.” With that, Azriel shoved Rhysand away, releasing the collar of the tunic as the High Lord stumbled backwards, the back of his knees bumping into his office chair and toppling it over.
Azriel had nothing left to say to the other male, yet he was still wound so tight. Icy fury and hot protectiveness rushed through him like adrenaline as he turned his back to the High Lord, retreating to the door.
This hadn’t made him feel better at all.
Just as he was about to leave the room, as silent and quick as he arrived, he paused. “Meet me at the training grounds in 20 minutes.” He ordered, casting a challenging look to Rhysand over his shoulder, daring him to correct him for ordering his High Lord around.
When Rhysand remained passive, Azriel added. “Don’t make me come and get you.”
Then he clicked the office door closed behind him, making a beeline for the training grounds. He could sense his shadows scrambling to catch up with him. They’d loitered in Rhysand’s office a few seconds longer than him, and he almost reprimanded them for it. But then one of his bigger shadows materialized, curling down his arm to place his discarded gloves in his waiting palm. He dismissed the shadow, not quite with praise, but thankful nonetheless as he tucked the gloves into a vacant pocket in his leathers. It would have irked him if he had to ask Rhysand for them back, after he threw them to the floor in such a dramatic display only to not throw a single punch.
He’d get those punches in soon though, and he was going to enjoy every single one with bare hands. Then, he would focus his attention on what really mattered, supporting you. One day, he hoped to prove to you that you had people right here who would choose you over their Court every damned time.
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