#so exploration got finished yesterday :3 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

laylajeffany · 2 months

Note

hello, me again.

I finished Chaos for the Fly yesterday and I’m still recovering. It was absolutely incredible. I already know watching season 2 of Wednesday will be weird because I’ll be expecting to see all your amazing OCs.

In the sequel, are we going to see more of Wednesday exploring her mimic abilities?

Thank you again for writing such an incredible story!

Thank you so much :3 It is the first time I’ve managed to finish a million word plus story, and I’m so glad I posted this one, otherwise I would have probably stopped writing back in about September of last year and it would have been one of my many abandoned, epic-length WIPs in my Cloud. I’m pretty proud of this story. I learned so much about myself writing (and finishing) it; I’ll forever be grateful I spent a year pouring all of my free time into a silly little fanfic project for what I got out of it.

If you loved OC Dr. Holly Gallor, check out Lovely Thorns for the love story of her and Larissa. There’s an update to that one coming this week! I also have a prompted Emiliana one-shot that will be here coming in the next week as well.

SPOILERS and a TINY sneak peak for the Chaos sequel, Karma in Glorious Splendor, below the cut ;)

Spoilers: We will absolutely be exploring Wednesday’s Mimic abilities in the sequel. In fact, it’s a point of contention. Within the first 10k or so of Chapter 1 we see they’re not always as simple (or consequence-free) as simply copying someone else’s power as she might’ve thought and anticipated in the first installment. We’re going to dive into more of the Raven lore as well.

There will also be a more heavy focus on the ‘homespun magic.’ Writing parts of the Frump family history made me fall in love with the idea of witchcraft again - reclaiming what’s been appropriated and sold to a mass market and making it all about intentions and what has meaning to the user…it’s certainly gotten me more in touch with my own sense of spirituality over the last year and I’ve appreciated it. I intend on having at least the same amount of time with Morticia as I did in Chaos. She doesn’t always understand what Wednesday’s experiencing, but just like Wednesday learned about intentions - it’s what you make of something that can change the outcome.

I think just by the nature of how Wednesday is growing, the Wenclair pairing will absolutely be more of a focal point in the sequel. Enid was critical to her journey, but she had to learn a lot of skills and history from others to be on the ride at all. Moving forward, she gets to pick her own path a little bit more, and with roadblocks in every single direction - she will be turning to Enid for what to do about it, rather than so many of the adults around her.

There will still be heavy themes of Wednesday’s idea of justice differing from what the reality of living in a system and the real world. An era of reconstruction is that - it doesn’t happen overnight, and we’re going to have to see Wednesday mature to make it through the slow-moving wheel of bureaucracy (even in the Outcast world). That ‘gift of time’ that she received for her birthday at the end is as much a curse as it is a blessing.

Her relationship with Larissa Weems has also changed so much. It isn’t the driving force behind any of Wednesday’s motivations in the sequel, and it’s going to take her remembering what they went through to keep stability between them.

As for OCs, Josie/Dr. Zypher will for sure have more of a backseat role in Karma - but Emiliana is going to be going through it, in terms of her Raven abilities and other struggles, even by the first 30k of chapter one that I’ve written so far. I have no intention of creating any more aside from any who are needed for the Werewolf Council.

Speaking of, we’ll be seeing tremendous growth from Enid through Wednesday’s POV as she faces her future and makes peace with her past. So much so, that it might just be a point of angst and contention for the girls as it seems like she’s moving so much farther ahead of Wednesday, who feels traps by a myriad of forces against her will.

Does this sound enticing? I hope so ;) I’ve enjoyed getting back into it - I’ve got very strict rules about when I’m allowed to work on writing it and I’ve been following them very well as not to let this one take over my life.

SNEAK PEAK (1,300 words) Featuring Morticia, Wednesday in the ether - bumping into Goody Addams Morticia obviously sensed that Wednesday was stewing in thoughts that day as she suggested, “A detaching meditation, to help you focus more on the present and less up here.” She tapped her own head and Wednesday scowled but didn’t disagree. “The midsummer solstice is just a few days away – so I am grateful you are dwelling on things that require extensive thought. However, it is possible the earth isn’t quite balanced enough and ready for you to explore them so deeply without the shift in the cosmos that the season will bring.”

Not sure entirely how much she subscribed to that, Wednesday also recognized that it wasn’t safe to spend so much time in her head, and agreed to a unique meditation with her mother. Morticia tried not to look too eager as she brought Wednesday out to the back porch closest to her study; the evening sun still had plenty of time to bathe her in the brightness that her nature tried to defy.

Morticia tucked a black string of beads over Wednesday’s shoulders, and she lifted a sunflower charm at the middle to examine it. “Holly says that Larissa is like a Sunflower.”

That made her mother give a knowing smile. “Tall, radiant, and always looking towards the sun, the light. I suppose that’s an accurate simile. Sunflowers are an old symbol for our solstice, as you know – though the perennials here won’t be in bloom for us until late July. Still, as we recognize the light of the season, I believe the symbol is appropriate.” She tucked herself beside Wednesday, her hands in her lap, her shoulders back – posture always immaculate. Wednesday tried to mimic her, shaking her head as she even thought about that word. “You spoke a powerful piece during supper, darling. But I know that’s not all that is on your mind. Would you like to release it, before you attempt to clear it?”

Wednesday moved the sunflower around on the string of beads, refusing to let out the heave of a sigh that threatened her. She really didn’t want to discuss physical intimacy with her mother on the back porch of their family home on a warm night in June…or, really – ever, if she could avoid it. There had surely been a few necessary conversations that had been had after her traumatic visions that past year regarding the topic, but that was a little bit different. She knew that Morticia would do her best not to gross her out with personal anecdotes – she’d gotten so much better at figuring out how to talk to her daughter…

“No,” She finally decided, seeing just the faintest twinge of disappointment in her mother’s still-gentle, mostly understanding smile. “I’m grateful you recognize what I need. I’m simply not ready to vocalize it. But – if I want to enjoy the next few days and try not to give into melancholy after the inevitable loss of time with Enid, I do need to let these thoughts go.” She let out the breath, finally, squaring her shoulders a little more to match the Dove beside her. “Teach me how?”

Morticia reached into a prepared basket, pulling out a small bundle of wildflowers. She placed three, five-sided thimbleweed plants in front of her, explaining, “Thimbleweeds are long since said to ward off negative energy. You are going to follow your usual light seeking breath work. Just before you slip into formal meditation to enter the ether, you are going to pluck each petal, and release your thoughts as you do so – three times. After you achieve peace in the ether, bring me your petals. We will steep them overnight, and then pour that negative energy down the drain in the morning.”

Wednesday wanted to merely accept what she’d said – but her always looming desire to be ornery won out as she corrected, “Sure, but – thimbleweed plants don’t have petals, they’re technically sepals.”

At that, her mother let out a throaty laugh that ended with a half a groan and a kiss to the top of Wednesday’s head as she stood up, squeezing her shoulders in a hug. “Release yourself of the burden of overthinking, my darling girl.”

Agreeing, Wednesday began her usual sequence of deep breathing, her eyes closed, doing nothing but counting, holding in air and letting it go. It was nearly ten minutes before she was almost at the point of visualizing her light and entering the ether. With enough pluck, mentally and physically, she tugged each of the sepals off the thimbleweeds, letting them fall into her lap as she thought to herself: release the hesitation of physical intimacy, release the fear of Enid being alone, release the sensation of inadequacy.

Repeating it as directed, Wednesday disassembled the final plant before picturing a sunflower, searching out the sun, finding herself tumbling pleasantly into a field full of them.

She stood up, feeling small as she wove through rows, trying to discern meaning from being there – why the universe brought her to such a place alone –

Except as she turned a corner, Wednesday crossed her arms, recognizing she wasn’t alone.

“I didn’t anticipate running into you outside of Jericho, particularly, in the light end of the ether,” She spoke with a little bit more cockiness than probably necessary.

Goody Addams looked her up and down with a bit of the same attitude. “I might not have much concept of time here, but even I feel a pull when it is nearly a solstice in your realm.” She ran her fingers over a fuzzy stem. “You shall soon be welcoming back the darkening days after the longest time of sun.”

Giving a dumb nod, Wednesday stared hard, wanting to be combative. She hadn’t sensed Goody in Jericho after putting up her monument, and certainly hadn’t tried seeking her out. It was their first interaction since she’d released the remnants of Quinton’s evil into the nether. Taking her in, she noticed. “You still have the Beanie Baby,” She said with the faintest twitch of her lips up, as Caw the blackbird stuck out of Goody’s apron pocket.

Her ancestor lifted it out, holding it in both hands, like it was as precious and fragile as a newborn baby. “I confess, this seemingly innocuous tchotchke has become meaningful to me,” She said in a confession that Wednesday didn’t anticipate. “I have not been able to access a place like this in what I assume to be hundreds of years. Yet, since our last interaction, since you gave me this children’s toy of comfort – I have found myself able to once again visualize places that have been long cutoff from my former psyche.”

“I suppose that’s encouraging,” Wednesday chided. “I told you it was not as silly as you wanted to think it was. Being comforted by someone or something we love is a very powerful magic. I am sorry that opportunity was taken away from you.”

Goody lifted her shoulders, stroking the yellow-orange beak of the bird. “If I was allowed to give into light without hiding it in the dark, you would not be here, Wednesday Addams.”

“I guess that’s something I share with my mentor, then,” Wednesday muttered, thinking about Imogen and Josie for a moment. She shook her head. “I recognize the privileges I have. But that doesn’t mean my life is easy simply because I’m not at risk of being burned at a literal stake every time I leave the house. Believe me, there are plenty of modern problems we face that I have yet to find solutions for.”

Goody tucked Caw to her chest with one hand, the other resuming the journey of feeling the different sunflower stems. “Yet – that was not what troubled you to bring you here.” Wednesday glared, wondering how she knew that. “Your face may be blank, but I can read you easily. You are troubled by personal demons, not societal ones.”

#layla answers fic questions #chaos for the fly #sneak peak!#I'm so excited but I'm not allowed to work on this today it's against the rules lol #Seriously a big thanks to everyone who's been giving this story all the love it's entirely kind and I very much appreciate it #I'm trying to reach out more I'm just super Wednesday coded and that's not like me haha

36 notes · View notes

kingofpopmj · 2 months

Text

Conscious Decision

Part 3

July 15th, 1988

Katherine and I spent the day together exploring London. She suggested we do some shopping before having lunch. Of course the moment she pulled me into a bridal boutique I knew she had an ulterior motive.

“This would look stunning on you!” Katherine complimented as she pointed out the gown on display.

“Mama Kay, that’s a wedding dress.”

“You should try it on.” She cheered. “It’ll be fun!”

“It’s beautiful but I think I’m going to pass on that.” I laughed off her comment.

“Michael was looking for you last night. He did not buy the jet lagged excuse.”

“Well, I’ll see him tonight.” I said as I guided her towards the exit.

“He fired Tatiana.” She said nonchalantly.

“What?”

“She’s a sweet girl but her crush on Michael was getting out of hand. My poor boy was so embarrassed. He had no idea she would do that.”

“Is he okay?”

“I think seeing his best friend would have helped.”

“Oh you’re making me feel bad on purpose!”

“You’re always the first person he runs to when something goes wrong. Yesterday, however, was the first time you weren’t there. It did a real number on him.”

“I’m sure he’s fine.”

“My boy is experiencing the beginning stages of losing the woman he loves. He is in no way shape or form fine.”

“He doesn’t love me in that way and he’s not losing me. I just needed a break to be alone and avoid any further damage to our friendship. I didn’t mean for my actions to come off as selfish. I’m sorry.”

“Here we go again with all the friendship hoopla.” Katherine rolled her eyes shaking her head. “You are not just friends-“

“We almost kissed. On opening night.” I blurted out. “He ran away from me and hid from everyone.”

“Oh, I see.”

“That’s why I said I think we were wrong.”

“I’m never wrong.” She said sternly ignoring my confession. I couldn’t help but laugh at her stubbornness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Y/N! There you are!” Michael shouted standing from his make-up chair. “Finally!”

“Your mom and I had a girls day.” I smiled hugging him. He kindly asked for the room and his entourage dispersed.

“How is the jet lag?” He asked suspiciously.

“I’m fine. I just need some rest.”

“You didn’t even stay for our after show ritual.”

“Michael-”

“It’s tradition!” He spoke over me. “Why did you leave?”

“I didn’t feel well.” It was partly true. He continued to study my demeanor.

“Tatiana.” He stated. “I didn’t- she wasn’t supposed to do that. I’ve never been so humiliated in my life.”

“I’m really sorry that happened. You didn’t deserve it.”

“You know.. every love song I write is about you.” He muttered.

“What?” I stared at him but he didn’t repeat himself. He closed the gap between us pulling me into his chest.

Each time the wind blows

I hear your voice so

I call your name

Whispers at morning

Our love is dawning

Heaven's glad you came

You know how I feel

This thing can't go wrong

I'm so proud to say I love you

Your love's got me high

I long to get by

This time is forever

Love is the answer

Michael softly sung into my ear as he swayed us back and forth. He held me for a moment longer before leaving a lingering kiss on my temple.

“Michael?” I spoke gently.

“I have to finish getting ready. Can you help with my hair? You’re the only one that does it the way I like.” He smiled pulling me across the room to his vanity.

I watched him as he excitedly gathered all the tools and products I would need. Every time I think we’re on the same page he throws a curveball. It makes it even worse that he just changes the subject as if nothing happened. As I began styling Michael’s hair my mind drifted off to how he makes me feel. When he holds me like that it’s impossible to hide my emotions. Michael is my home. When he holds me I feel complete. He’s the only person I truly feel safe with.

“I love hearing you sing.” I said as I fixed his hair.

“Thank you.”

“I love that song. It’s really beautiful.”

“It’s one of my favorites. It’s like it was in my head my whole life and all I needed to do was write it down.” he met my gaze through the mirror. “It’s inspiring being in love.”

“In love?” I broke our eye contact and tried to focus on his hair. “That’s sweet.”

“Are you in love?”

“Michael-”

“Because I think you are.” He turned to me placing his hands on my hips. “Please tell me that you are.” He stared at me expectantly as he rises from his seat.

Here we are again.

Our chests became connected as I felt his fingers slip under the hem of my shirt leaving a strong tingling feeling along my hips. We were admiring each other’s lips and yearning for what came next.

“I am.” I finally spoke.

“Y/N, I-“ there was a loud obnoxious knock on the door as it swung open.

“Oh-oh- I-I’m so sorry” Greg stood there with an apologetic look on his face. “ I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“It’s okay.” Michael said. “What is it?”

“Princess Diana is on her way. They want us all in place for her arrival.”

Michael looked at me and I gave him a nod. He looked nervous as his lips met my cheek and he hugged me tightly.

“We will talk later.” He stated hopefully as he moved towards the door.

“I’m so sorry.” Greg mouthed before closing the door leaving me alone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This next song is very special to me. It comes from my heart.” Michael spoke as the lights began to dim. “I’m going to perform it a little differently tonight. I hope you don’t mind.” His beautiful voice filled the stadium.

I just want to lay next to you for a while

You look so beautiful tonight

Your eyes are so lovely

Your mouth is so sweet

A lot of people misunderstand me

That's because they don't know me at all

I just want to touch you

And hold you

I need you, God I need you

I love you so much

Michael’s intimate intro to ‘I Just Can’t Stop Loving You’ caused chills to travel down my spine. The longer I kept my eyes on him the more I thought about our moment in his dressing room earlier. There was so much emotion behind it. I just wanted to know what he was thinking. I took a moment to look out into the full stadium. The audience was lit up with thousands of lighters hovering over the sea of fans.

Wow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We all gathered backstage after the show to celebrate. I didn’t realize how many people would be here or how loud it was going to get. Nonetheless, I was really enjoying myself, I was sitting with the band when everyone suddenly went silent. I followed their stare and saw the man of the hour.

“Dance with me.” Michael held his hand out and I gladly accepted.

“You’re my favorite dance partner.”

My comment went unnoticed as Michael stared off. His grip on me tightened as we danced in silence. He placed my arms further around his neck pulling me closer to him. Two songs went by without a word from him.

“Michael?” I poked his cheek getting his attention. “What’s going on up there?”

“Nothing.” He spat. He never snapped at me. It made me feel awful. His coldness triggered me deeply making me feel insignificant.

“What’s your problem?”

“I asked you to dance with me why do you feel the need to pester me.” I stepped away immediately looking at him as if he was a stranger. “Y/N-“ he said softly reaching for my hand.

“You’re being so ugly to me.” I shook my head walking away leaving him standing alone. I shoved the dressing room door open swiftly gathering my belongings.

“Jet lagged again.” I heard Michael’s mocking voice behind me.

“No actually at the moment I’m extremely fed up with you.”

“Me?”

“Yes you!” I pointed at him as my vision became blurry. “Why would you ask me to dance just to speak to me like that? You’ve never treated me like that before.”

“No! I wanted to dance with you because- I just- some of the guys from the crew were talking about you. I couldn’t- I tried to keep my cool but they were saying- I didn’t like it-“

“Wait.” I wiped my eyes. “You asked me to dance so no one else could?”

“I-“ he was frozen in place and I felt myself begin to tremble from how angry I was.

“You know what Michael. How about you figure out what you want because I can’t handle this anymore. One minute you’re serenading me asking me if I’m in love and the next you’re acting like this. You keep saying all these things and I have no idea how I’m supposed to take them because you never explain. It feels like you’re toying with me and it isn’t fair. Do you know how terrifying it is to be in love? The thought of losing that person destroys you because he’s one of the most important people in your life. Every time he gives you a shred of hope that he may feel the same he disregards it just as quickly- and it doesn’t even matter because to me- to me he is everything. He’s my everything. This back and forth is- it’s mentally exhausting Michael, but I’m still here.” I frantically caught my breath, Michael’s wide eyes brought me to the realization that I said way too much. He remained silent. I wanted to evaporated. Silence. I just shook my head brushing past him.

Nothing was going to be the same ever again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

July 16th, 1988

A bright golden beam of sunlight streamed through the curtains seeping through my eyelids. I sighed pulling a pillow over my face. It’s too early for this. The events of the last two days begin running through my mind as I closed my eyes. I’m a complete mess. If I could stay in bed all day I would. Michael was giving me so many mixed signals but, after last night, I’m afraid he may never speak to me again. I sat up throwing the pillow across the room with force.

“You weren’t aiming for me right?” My head snapped to the side to see Michael standing in front of the window looking out at the London sky.

“Michael!” I yelled pulling the comforter up to cover my pajamas.

“I brought us breakfast.”

“How did you get in here?”

“French toast! Your favorite..” he sang placing the take out trays on the table.

“How long were you watching me sleep?”

“I got extra syrup and fresh strawberries.” He danced taking a big bite of a strawberry.

“You scared me! Why are you here this early?”

“I knew the only way you’d listen to me is if I showed up unannounced and brought food.” A smile spread across his face. “Come on sit.”

“Give me a minute.” I sprinted to the bathroom and softly shut the door behind me. I brush my teeth and wash my face but my nerves are still through the roof. Michael’s here in my room acting suspiciously normal. I focused on my breathing as I walked out back into the room.

“My mom.” He stated as I took the seat across from him.

“What?”

“She had a spare key. I was just answering your earlier question.”

“Oh, then yes.” I smiled taking a bite.

“Yes?”

“I was aiming for you.” I answered sticking my tongue out.

“Ha. Ha. Ha. I have a comedian for a best friend folks!” He announced to an imaginary crowd.

“What would you like to talk to me about?” I asked laughing.

“I need you to promise me something first.”

“What is that?”

“I need you to let me say everything I need to say to you without interrupting me.”

“Is everything okay?” His tone beginning to make me nervous.

“I’ll explain everything.”

“I promise. No interrupting.” I held my hand up letting him know I took the oath seriously.

“Well, I want to thank you for visiting me. It’s the sweetest thing anyone has done for me in a long time. This tour has been incredible, but I have missed you very much. It’s just- everything is better when you’re around.” He slid his hand onto the table slowing inching it towards me. He gave me a small smile and I knew exactly what he wanted, so I placed my hand in his. “I know I’ve been all over the place and I’m sorry. It’s just- it’s such a tough situation. I would never intentionally toy with your feelings. I know that’s why you were avoiding me. I understand why and it’s okay. It was just for a few hours but knowing you didn’t want to see me was the worst feeling in the world.”

“I’ve kept something from you for a few years now because I truly believed it was for the best. It was easier when we were kids. We didn’t have to worry or stress. Once I got to the age where I understood my feelings it became more difficult, but not impossible. I told myself it was better to have you as my best friend than not have you at all. I wanted you in my life. I need you and I hate the idea of my feelings ruining our friendship. Then, my career took this incredible albeit insane turn. All the hard work, struggle and pain of my childhood was finally paying off, but it came at a cost. I’m constantly ridiculed, bullied and betrayed. They all misunderstand me because they don’t know me. I’m just a punchline to them.” He places his hand over his eyes leaning his elbow on the table in attempt to conceal his watery eyes. “I knew I had to protect you from this world. The media attacking you. The paparazzi stalking you. I couldn’t bear leaving you vulnerable to it all. There has always been an excuse. And they all seemed like great excuses. It wasn’t until yesterday that I realized it was fear holding me back. The fear of losing you, but let’s face it you aren’t going anywhere and neither am I. Y/N, there is nothing in this world that is worth keeping my distance from you.” His hand fell from his face and landed over mine.

“Y/N, I could never close my heart to you because it’s yours. It has always been yours.”

“I’m terrified but I think- I hope you want this too. I hope you want me- us.”

“I know what happened opening night hurt you. I know because if I had to watch some schmuck kiss you… or dance with you…” he paused his rant shifting in his seat “I would loose my mind. It would break me.” He squeezed his eyes shut softly shaking his head back and forth. “I could feel your pain. I could feel the ache in your heart. I could feel your tears. It was unbearable. I never want to be the cause of it again. Ever.”

“The reality is if we become more it will change your life in an instant. I pray that you feel I’m worth it as much as I feel you are. I know you are. It won’t be easy, but I vow to do everything in my power to keep any harm from coming to you. I will always protect you.”

“Lovely, in all the ways I’ve pictured my life, you are always in it. You and I are inevitable. We are predestined. It’s in the stars. Everything in me chooses you. You are it. You’re the dream of all dreams. You’re my dream come true. I love you. I love you infinitely.”

Michael’s shoulders relaxed as he let out a deep sigh. He stood up and pulled his chair over to sit beside me. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. My Michael.

“I um- that was probably too much to throw at you all at once. Goodness it’s hot in here.” He started playing with his hair and I knew he was panicking.

“Can I talk now?” I whispered. He hesitantly nodded.

“Michael, please look at me.” His eyes were closed and he shook his head no. “Michael”

He didn’t move and I could tell he thought I was going to reject him. My hands landed on his broad shoulders, his eyes still closed as I ever so gently turned him towards me. I tried to focus on my breathing as my hands traveled to the back of his neck. My fingers running through his curls. I took a brief moment to catch my breath before I leaned in.

As our lips met, a strong bolt of electricity ran through my body. I felt his hands tenderly cup my face as he deepened the kiss, his lips moving against mine with a gentle urgency. In that moment, nothing else mattered - no excuses - no fears.

Surprisingly, the thought of being pressed up against Michael never crossed my mind, but now that it was happening, I didn’t want it to end. Michael’s hands were strong as he affectionately caressed my body. Our lips slightly parted - our breathing heavy - our gazes falling onto one another. Michael didn’t waste time letting his eyes travel. His breath hitched as he lustfully scanned my legs on either side of his hips.

“Oh lovely.” He quickly caught my lips again gripping the back of my thighs. He stood up carrying me with ease as he moved over to the bed.

I felt the plush mattress form to the curves of my body as Michael hovered over me leaving sweet kisses across my collarbone.

“I love you Y/N” he mumbled against my skin with each kiss.

“My entire life...” he stopped and adjusted himself to look into my eyes. “My whole life I’ve been completely in love with you.” The corners of his lips curved up and he buried his face into my neck. “Michael, I love you with my whole heart.”

“Please don’t let this be a dream.” Michael pleaded.

“This is real.” I smiled finding his lips again. “This is happening.”

“Y/N?” He said against my lips.

“Yes Michael?”

“Can I take you on a date? A real date. Just the two of us. Tonight after the show.” He moved to the space next to me as we both shifted laying on our sides to face each other.

“I would love that.”

“I want to kiss you forever.”

“I would love that.” I repeated flirtatiously.

“My girl.” He smiled leaning his forehead against mine. “You’re my girl..”

“Oh I am?” I teased.

“I would like you to be mine. Do you want to be my girl?”

“Hmmm.. let me think.”

Michael began singing and my heart melted further with each lyric.

You know how I feel

I won't stop until

I hear your voice saying

"I do"

Michael watched me intently waiting for my answer. He leaned closer and I smiled kissing him deeply “I do” I said against his lips.

This thing can't go wrong

This feeling's so strong

Well, my life ain't worth living

If I can't be with you

I just can't stop loving you

And if I stop

Then tell me, just what will I do

I just can't stop loving you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There it is part 3!!!

Ahhhhh! Maybe part 4?

I hope you all enjoyed this rollercoaster lol

Let me know what you think. Also, should I put together a tag list?

#michael jackson #michael joseph jackson #michael jackson imagine #michael jackson x reader #king of pop #bad era #bad tour

28 notes · View notes

losech · 18 days

Text

Yesterday's eclipse trip was pretty cool, for the first half. I found a very secluded penninsula and explored a bunch of it looking for a spot. I ended up bushwhacking through reeds and walking in Lake Erie to get to the very southern most tip. Most people who go there take a boat. It was a super cool spot that I had planned on watching the entire eclipse, start to finish, from. But my dogs had to get into mischief and change that plan.

Cinder found a muskrat, that attached itself to her face. That alone likely would have produced a couple deep punctures or a small tear, but Ember had to contribute. She has been trying to catch a muskrat her entire life and she wasn't going to pass this opportunity up. She grabbed it and yanked it off Cinder's face then proceeded to thrash it around in the lake. She was in her element and thoroughly enjoyed it.

Cinder on the other hand was left with a long and deep gash on her face in her whiskers. It bled a lot for a while, and after calling the vet and sending them a photo, I decided to try to hike back to the car right as the eclipse began and hopefully get her to the evet before traffic got bad.

It had taken us 3 hours of hiking to get to the point, not including the extra exploring, and by avoiding the reeds, downed trees, and mud by walking directly through the lake for at least a mile, we managed to cut that 4 mile hike down to one and a half hours. I was 10 minutes from the car when totality began, and I did stop right before to watch. It only lasted 30 seconds where I was but it was extremely cool. My favorite part was the 360 sunset look the sky had, I had read about everything else I saw except for that and that was super neat to experience.

We got back to the car right as other people began leaving but we beat most of them out. It took two hours to get to the evet. And that's where it got obnoxious. I guess the eclipse fucked with everyone's pets cause a ton of critical patients kept coming in, more than any other time I have been there. We waited for over 8 hours just to be handed a bill and a couple meds and told to go home. It was 1:30am so I was not happy, but I do understand that a dog with a split lip is not a priority over animals that are actively dying. I just wish they'd told us they wouldn't have been able to get to us sooner.

I called off work because I was exhausted and covered in muck and blood, and had decided to try to get Cinder into my normal vet this morning. When I had called them they said they had an opening for surgery I could schedule, which is what I'd preferred to do, but due to the location and size of the gash, I opted for the evet at their reccomendation. So before they opened, I drove almost the whole way there then stopped and called to ask if they still had an opening. They did, and were able to fix Cinder's face and did a good job on it. I think they felt bad for me, they knocked a bunch of drugs off the bill and it came out to less than $200. Total it was around $360, which is significantly less than both estimates I had gotten.

Poor Cinder is sad and whiny, she doesn't care for how she feels right now. She's definitely not like Flint who always just vibed while anesthesia was wearing off.

I definitely want to go back to that penninsula, there's a lot more to explore. Probably do it on a hot day so walking in the lake won't feel as cold.

#ember #cinder #west siberian laika #hiking #eclipse #lake erie

21 notes · View notes

liesmyth · 1 month

Note

Okay this is weirdly specific and obvs if the answer requires doxing yourself don't answer but hjdkfg fave places to go running at? I started going on more walks and it's so fun to explore the local space!!

no worries! I'm very alright with telling people I live in Rome, a city of 3 million people. you can all have that for free etc. (actually, I'm very braggy about it. borderline obnoxious, ngl. Think the Italy equivalent of a New Yorker)

Also!!! I LOVE THIS QUESTION SO MUCH. It made me go through Strava history and dig some running pic I took.

the appia antica route!

if you (generic you) are ever in Rome, there's a lovely green area along the old Appia way that's great for running but also for picnics. My favourite local road race (coming up next month!!) is partly along that route and it's SO beautiful. It's one of those places that make you feel you're genuinely grateful you have a body to move around in and experience the wind and the sun and the mosquitoes in your teeth and the achy calves from doing a few km on cobblestones. It's a very large green area (Appia Antica / Parco degli Acquedotti / Parco di Tor Fiscale / Parco della Caffarella) and there are so many fun trails and paths.

Lungotevere / centro storico swag

Sometimes u (me) gotta flex and be like "oh, look, I live in Rome" and just plot your long run so that you end up by the Vatican or whatever. There's a route along the Tiber river that's technically a bike lane but it's large enough to run safely, and it's really fun for Sunday runs / whenever you have a bit of time to actually get there.

There are other really great running spots in central Rome like any of the parks (Villa Borghese, Villa Ada etc. and EYE don't really do it often but it's very nice)

Here's a pic! Not mine

Country roads take me home etc — Castelli Romani

Hilly towns just outside the city that have veeery fun trails and countryside views! You have to actually get there so it's a bit involved, and then once you're there you're like "why the fuck did I think running up a hill was a good idea?" but if you DO like running up hills, it's fun. I like going in the summer for longer runs and I don't bring any snacks just absolutely gorge myself on blackberries from the bushes.

My beloved neighbourhood run.

I love walking out of the door and just going for it! It's very entertaining as far as "neighbourhood routes" go. It's a decently safe area, I can stay well clear of cars, there's a car park I can do sprints in (and, occasionally, will see people fucking in cars, as one does) and some green. I wish it had a bit more elevation, but there's a stretch of road that's decently hilly so I can't complain + there are some VERY interesting characters and sights. Alas, it's within sniffing distance of a bakery AND a steakhouse, so there isn't a time of the day I can run at without getting hungry along the way, but I don't mind — I have been known to plot a route so that I finish right in front of a bakery for breakfast.

no landmark photos for obvious reasons but here are some cute birdies I saw running a few weeks ago

Holiday run!

One thing I really love to do on holiday is go run around a new city / any place I've never been in, and exploring new places while I'm at it. Some of my most beloved holiday memories are of running early in the morning in new places. Sometimes it backfires horribly and you end up on a muddy path at six thirty AM with water in your shoes and frantically trying to match your phone GPS with that of the route you downloaded yesterday, but it's usually worth it. These are a few photos I had on my phone — the beach is somewhere along lake Garda, and it's been years and I still remember that run with a lot of fondness. Also, another time I got lost in the middle of nowhere in Tuscany and ended up chatting with an incredibly MILFy American tourist who was also out running and that too is a fond memory... anyway. Holiday runs my beloved

#dyannawynnedayne #askbox games #jockposting #runblr #long post #elle.jpg

18 notes · View notes

grape-eating-vampire · 2 months

Text

alright, it's done. i finished it.

this is the third and final part of things that happened in my first bg3 playthrough ever that I found so funny that I put them in my notes (spoilers below)

let me start this by saying I have only cried twice in the 155 hours it took me to complete this shit. however, I have almost-screamed at the characters more times than I'd like to admit. but first here's stuff that happened since the last one of these posts I made:

after killing Orin I went around Baldur's Gate for a while and did odd sidequests, including

clearing out a haunted house and sidelining to kill a stinky man in a wardrobe (and drag his body to a guy two streets over)

entirely ignored Gale's quest to look at a book because I kept getting arrested there after having killed the boss mage guy

I also foolishly though this wouldn't have any consequences. oh boy was I wrong

went to see a underwater prison, got told off by Gortash, decided to explore it after killing him, and promptly forgot to do so

killed Gortash! fuck that guy the only good thing about him is his fancy robe

tried to recruit a dragon called Ansur, found out the emperor is Balduran (????????? honestly I was shocked)

killed said dragon and felt like I was playing skyrim all over again

found a letter ("Dear Ansur") by Balduran/the Emperor. this was the first time I cried. I could still cry.

patch 6 came out! that was yesterday and I spent about 10 minutes trying out new kisses and sitting on Shadowhearts stool in camp (she now says "I'm glad you decided to join me" or something like that when you do)

went pretty much straight to the underground pool thing where the brain was supposed to be

failed abysmally to Dominate The Brain™

got pulled out by the emperor and had to start beef with Lae'zel because I had also forgotten to care about Orpheus and the hammer from the House of Hope

admittedly, I didn't really forget, I just didn't want to spend any more time with Raphael than I absolutely had to

my +14 persuasion saved the day once more and Lae'zel was fine with the one hope in her life getting his brains sucked out

went off to fight the brain once more. my game crashed twice trying to load that cutscene.

met all my allies! I forgot how many there were actually, and I only called on two of the groups later on

fought a lot. like a LOT lot.

got to the Netherbrain and kicked it's ass*

*had to reload about 3 times and try again because Minsc at level 12 was stuck on 100 hp for some reason and kept fucking dying

finally managed to kill the fucker! had Lae'zel deal the killing blow which seemed very fitting

more cutscenes, but this one actually didn't crash the game, I got to look at some beautiful unloaded walls and stuff instead

Lae'zel left right after we got to the haven. understandably so

remember how I ignored Gale's quest? well he didn't blow himself up like he inteded earlier, but he left to becOME A GOD????? I cannot fucking deal with this man

Karlach on the pier. this was the second time I cried, but unproportionally much so

Wyll left with her for Avernus, the little cutscene of them arriving there made me feel a bit better

Astarion had to leg it because of the sun (sorry)

Shadowheart didn't do much of anything during all of this, neither did Minsc, Halsin or Jaheira

decided to go help kids with Halsin, seems to fit my character (eventhough I really didn't roleplay so much)

we got an epilogue! yippie!

caught up there with everyone, except Lae'zel (who was there via the fantasy version of zoom) and Gale (who was there via the fantasy equivalent of a voicemail)

tried to hug Gale, couldn't, almost cried again but managed

also met a tressym who I recognized from fanart as Tara. I don't know why she was there, we never met her before and Gale hadn't mentioned her either

read a LOT of letters the party had received. barely kept my composure at the Gur's letter to Astarion

Withers did a cool speech and the game ended

after all of this and so much more that I didn't take notes about, I can confidentially say that Baldur's Gate 3 is the best video game I have ever played, and within it's genre my favourite ever!

I'm also emotionally devestated, especially after these final parts (but in a good way)

that's all, thanks for reading!

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #orin the red #enver gortash #astarion #gale #wyll #karlach #lae'zel #shadowheart #jaheira #minsc #withers #bg3 spoilers #the emperor #ansur

43 notes · View notes

bl3upi3 · 1 year

Text

Don't play with fire (chapter 2)

[Lo'ak x OC]

[prev] [next]

DISCLAIMER: This Avatar fan fiction is made only with the help of my imagination. I wanted to imagine a story that would take place in Avatar 3 so after "the way of water". I read that this movie would be about fire people, so I tried to imagine this clan with the information found on interenet. In this fan fiction Lo'ak is 18 years old and everything that is said about "The Ash People" in this book was invented and was not certified by James Cameron. English is not my first language so sorry if I don't know some of the words, please be indulgent, I might edit this story once I finish. I still hope you will like it.

Summary: One year after the events in the Reefs, the Sully family decides to move again, to a new clan said to be able to bring the dead back to life. What happens when Lo'ak meets the princess of the volcanoes? Him who was already promised to the Metkayina princess finds himself in a strange situation when he falls for another girl.

Lo’ak's POV

The arrival at the volcano was not easy, after this long trip and the bad reception we received I did not think we would stay there, but my parents were determined to have an answer to their question.

The morning after our arrival I decided to go out of the crater to explore. I walked to a watering hole but as I approached it I saw a figure in the water. It was Äära the daughter of the chief, the one who as soon as we arrived let us know that we were not welcome. I looked at her in the distance, hiding behind a tree, she looked so peaceful right away, not the same girl I met yesterday. She was sitting on a rock, her feet in the water lost in her thoughts writing in what seemed to be a journal, she knew I was there because as soon as I approached the tree her ears perked up and she raised her head looking in my direction, I had time to hide my face before she saw me but it wasn't enough.

"Get out of there Lo'ak and stop stalking me" I hear her say, I close my eyes and sigh before coming out of my hiding place with both hands in the air.

"You got me" I say with an embarrassed smile.

"You're loud" she stood up as walked towards me, I was ready to have a conversation similar to yesterday's "You and your family are wasting your time here" she continued brushing past me.

I followed her with my eyes, "My mother wants to think that there is hope of seeing my brother again" I spoke.

She stopped walking and turned to face me "It's hard but she has to move on".

"How can you say that? You don't know how hard it is for her".

"It's hard for everyone Lo'ak" she said curtly, I don't know why but my name coming out of her mouth was like music to my ears.

I blinked hard, bringing me out of my thoughts, "You don't know what you're talking about," I returned to the subject.

I saw her clench her fist then take a deep breath before releasing the tension in her hand " The world doesn't revolve around you " she said before turning and walking away " I'll come get you and Spider for training later "

I watched her walk away before turning back to the pond, I walked to the rock where she was sitting and found the notebook she was writing in just before, I looked back in the direction she had gone to make sure she wasn't coming back for it before opening it and reading a few pages.

She was talking about her life in general and what she was experiencing, not much of interest, I think it was a new diary and there were many before because this one started to be written on her last birthday. I flipped through it until I came across the page that talked about us "demon blood is among us, are they really that bad? Eywa wouldn't accept this if it was bad would she? They think they can bring Neteyam back and I'm afraid they won't accept to hear the truth" Neteyam? How does she know his name?

I went back to the camp and waited for her to come and get us.

"Hey bro I'm not coming, Jake asked me to help him prepare the offering for the party" said Spider punching me in the arm

"Are you serious?" I grumble

"Sorry" he mutters as he walks away.

He's so fucking annoying, he wants to live like us but the only thing he knows is to lick our father's boots.

"Mmh Mmh" I looked up and found Äära with her arms crossed "lets go"

"Spider is not coming" I followed her.

"I know I heard him" she answered without turning around

"Were you hiding?" I chuckled.

"Hiding from what?" she sighed

"I don't know, but anyway, why is everyone preparing an offering? What's the big deal?"

"Every month we celebrate my mother's pregnancy," we started to go deeper into the forest, "and we make offerings to thank Eywa".

"Why? Isn't it supposed to be something ordinary?"

"Don't open your mouth when you don't know what you're talking about" she turned around with a cut showing her teeth. I jumped and took a step back. "My mother has a hard time having children, that's why I'm an only child, well not for much longer" her attitude dropped.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that" she turned and continued walking to the training place.

"You must already be a good hunter but here we hunt with knives, which is more difficult than arrows especially when the target is moving" she took out three small knives from behind the bushes "Try your best to aim at the center" she gave them to me.

"It will be a piece of cake, give me a real target" I teased.

She squinted her eyes and put her head to the side without saying anything. I threw the knives and only one of them hit the target on the area but none in the center of it.

"You're a skxawng" she rolled her eyes and retrieved the knives, she moved closer to me and I reached out my hand to get the knives back. But she stares at my hand and especially my fingers, she takes my hand and traces my palm and then my fingers delicately. Shivers go through me when I feel her skin against mine but then she becomes cold again and lets go of my hand.

"What do you want me to do? Cut them?" I say with irritation.

"You have 5 so use them all" she says before putting a knife in my hand. I tried my luck again but still none in the center of the target.

I heard a laugh and when I looked towards Äära someone was standing next to her with an arm around her neck, she looked irritated too.

"Who are you?" I asked.

"Who am I? You must be kidding, you're looking at the future Olo'eyktan" the man answered with a haughty look.

"Lo'ak this is Aysär" she lowered her eyes, she looked ashamed.

"Monsters like you don't deserve to live" the man came closer and started to turn around and analyze me "We should exterminate your whole family" he touched my tail.

"Please Aysär go I will join you" she said with a worried look.

" Everything you ask princess " he moved back the arms in the air as if to surrender " I'll wait for you " he finished before disappearing into the forest.

"Who is he?" I asked.

"My soon-to-be husband" she walked towards me without looking me in the eyes.

"This guy is going to be Olo'eyktan?

"Tsahik." she cut me off "He's going to be Tsahik, but I haven't told him yet. My father wants to name me Olo'eyktan" she put her hand on my shoulder still refusing to look at me "See you tonight" she said before she also walked away.

Anger built up inside me and I threw the knife, which came to the center of the target for the first time.

After hours of training alone I returned to our tent.

"Where have you been? Mom and dad are waiting for us, the party has started" Kiri said hurriedly and took me by the hand to lead me back outside. On the way out I grabbed Äära's diary and put it on the back of my waistband. "You need to see this, it's beautiful" she pulled me down the stairs and we joined our family.

"Lo'ak! Where have you been?" my mother asked, putting her hand on my cheek and scanning me to make sure I wasn't hurt. Since Neteyam's death she was much more caring and careful than before, sometimes I just wish that everything was a dream and that my brother was still here with me. I looked towards the crowd of people around the fire, Äära was dancing with other women. I watched as she moved her body to the sound of the drums and I couldn't resist tracing my gaze along it, her hips following the rhythm too.

"Stop checking her out" Spider spoke bumping me in the stomach.

" I'm not doing it" I looked at him and my cheeks became hot with embarrassment.

I looked at the other side seeing my mother, Kiri and Tuk being taken away by the Tsahik with the other women. Kiri tried to run away but was caught by mom while Tuk was happy to go dancing.

"I think that now she is the one who is checking you out" Spider said making me turn my attention back to the girl who was looking at me and for the first time I saw her smile which automatically placed a smile on my lips. "I know someone who is going to hit it tonight" he added.

"Shut up, she's got someone" I slammed the back of his head and the smile I was wearing disappeared right away.

I haven't really had a chance to talk to Äära since that afternoon. The party was divided into two parts, the women were with each other and the men too, no one was mixing. I heard other men say that this party was to thank Eywa but also served to most of them to find a mate. I find this a bit disgusting knowing that this party is dedicated to Ìhari and her pregnancy.

I needed to talk to Äära about Neteyam, I needed an answer. She walked towards me and I noticed the white marks on her belly.

"It's a stupid ritual" she laughed as she passed me and I started to follow her. "It's supposed to wish for fertility. Look at your mother" I turned and looked as she said and my mother also had handprints on her belly.

"We don't need a second Tuk" I laughed. We moved away from the festivities and I found the courage to talk about what I had read this morning. "How do you know Neteyam?" I began.

She stopped and turned back to me "I don't know who that is" she scoffed. I handed her the diary and her eyes widened, "What the fuck, are you serious?" she ripped the notebook out of my hands, "I was beginning to trust you and you read my diary. Do you know what privacy is?" She was about to leave but I grabbed her arm stopping her in her tracks.

"Wait, I shouldn't have done that but I couldn't help myself. I need to know." she looked into my eyes and her gaze softened.

"Eywa told me through the fire," she said softly.

"Fire?" I raised my eyebrow.

"Yeah, that's one thing I can do, I can read through fire".

"So you can talk to him?"

"No it doesn't work like that Lo'ak" the same feeling as this morning appeared in the pit of my stomach at the sound of my name coming from her mouth "I need to get closer to where he was returned to Eywa"

"The spirit tree in the Cove of the Ancestors, I can take you there!

"If that's what you want" she smiled sympathetically as she nodded, "Sleep well," she said before walking away.

A/N: Happy New Year! I kind of like this chapter and I have a lot of inspiration for this fanfic. Don't forget to like and reblog. And don’t hesitate to give me ideas in the comments.This book is also on my Wattpad @_bl3upi3

*tag list*

@sakura-onesan @maraudersrry @honestlyka @max-xie @lovergirl-3000 @mushroomlover13 i can't tag some people idk why !

#avatar twow #avatar the way of water #atwow #avatar #avatar 2 #avatar 3 #lo'ak fanfiction #lo'ak x reader #lo'ak imagine #sully family #neteyam #neytiri #tuktirey #jake sully #fanfic #fanfiction

151 notes · View notes

violetsareblue-selfships · 7 months

Text

good morning!! :3

#so i'll probably start the next region's exploration today #got to like 84~% yesterday and i'm sure most of those underground segments connect to a quest #(if they don't i'll complete them once I finish the world quests but anyways lol)#also!!#that cold front or whatever is actually doing something #according to my laptop it's 44 deg. F outside so woah #like i woke up feeling chilly which is honestly nice ^^#<-- girl who loves fall weather & wearing hoodies so this works out :3 #well anyway #i hope you have a good day/night! <3 #morning rambles

4 notes · View notes

moralanxietystudio · 11 months

Text

Roadwarden - In Search of Urgency Through Limitations

(This is a repost of my Twitter thread that got quite a dose of love yesterday, so I figured you may be interested in it as well.

1/ Hi! I was invited to post a thread for #MAMG23 on a unique feature of my fantasy game, Roadwarden. I’d like to tell you about its most controversial design choice - the time limit. The expectation that you’ll finish the game without seeing some parts of what it has to offer.

2/ In RW, you play as a single character patrolling the roads of a distant peninsula, aiding or harming its tribes. This land has grown detached from any strong, governmental body, and you start the game as an outsider, an agent, a spy sent here by the city.

3/ You’re encouraged to travel, make friends, learn more, but instead of being The Chosen One, you’re just a rider, a traveling sheriff. And you’re meant to get back to the city soon - usually, in 40 days, after which you are held accountable for your actions and their outcomes.

4/ You start with a personal goal you can select from a short list, and a few other quests to guide you, but none of them are obligatory. You may shape the fate of various people, or even whole settlements, but that’s just a small dent in the grand scheme of things.

5/ I think the reason why it works is that RW tries to make you feel attached to its NPCs and villages. Most people are guarded at first, but open up as you prove your worth to them - or manipulate them. You get options to spend time with them, to share meals and ale.

6/ You see NPCs’ perspectives as you exchange news and rumors. You get familiar with the way people get by, with their routines, and their plans for the future. My NPCs may not have the most depth, but in many ways, you get to learn about their vulnerabilities.

7/ At the start of the game, you’re also vulnerable system-wise, and you won’t increase your stats much. Instead, you rely on others to help you get out of the loop of hindrances. You grow closer with people - by quests, trading, hanging out - and open access to convenient tools.

8/ You unlock new shelters, free supplies, free care, free advice, lower prices, even direct help during tasks. You collect favors. It’s no wonder you may grow attached to NPCs and their problems, and actually care about what’s going to happen to them.

9/ (It’s a very different approach to many older video game plots, where your character would get dropped into mid-apocalypse, saving the world they know nothing about, or trying to save their sibling/village after a brief introduction, relying on our real-life contexts.)

10/ Your character is weak, and travels between the “points of light” (villages, inns) and the threatening wilderness, seeking ways to optimize your journeys, avoiding threats until prepared to face them, sticking to the main roads at first, then exploring the more obscure paths.

11/ But the game needed tension to make this work, to let you game the systems while pushing you into taking an occasional leap of faith. Balancing between risk and preparations is where the challenge comes from. Hence - the time limit.

12/ In the core game mode, the character has 40 in-game days to explore the peninsula. They can complete the game before that, but once the time runs out, they are forced to return to the city - very often begrudgingly. Not many people get to finish all of the quests.

13/ Without save-scumming (reloading the game in hopes to get better results) or looking up a guide / seeking advice online, the player will struggle. I didn’t intend for them to see everything during their first playthrough. They’re meant to taste failure.

14/ RW is most rewarding when the player accepts their character’s shortcomings. When they decide that they need to leave a village to itself since they lack the time to help it. That they can’t rescue a traveler, or a place, because they’ve got to move on.

15/ Judging by RW’s reception, it’s an unintuitive, and not exactly welcome, design. Most people, myself included, expect to have the option to 100% the game from the get go. Despite my best efforts, it seems like I didn’t succeed at setting the game’s promises correctly.

16/ The tutorial section of the game tries to set the expectations straight. It promises that the peninsula is overgrowing, wild, filled with monsters, that the locals are *pagans*, that the time limit is pressing. But many players don’t treat these threats seriously.

17/ Oftentimes, they see these promises as the set up for a story of success, something to overcome with enough grind and wit. It seems like the game failed at making it clear that it tries to embrace human limitations, that it’s a part of the core experience.

18/ The game didn’t make it clear that by deciding what matters to you the most, whom you want to help, whom you leave behind, which mysteries you unravel, which conflicts you solve, and when you put your needs above others - you get to make meaningful choices.

19/ My ideas did resonate with some, and I saw people playing the game once on the “standard” mode, then again, on the “casual” mode - with no time limit - to experience the rest of the story threads. I think it’s even better to take a longer break between playthroughs.

20/ This way, you focus on your character, and encounter the realm beyond your grasp. You get to embrace your mistakes and choices. If you return to the game after a year or two, it will feel different, as you are also not going to be the same being.

21/ It may not be a reasonable expectation on my part. But to justify myself, I’d like to make it clear that the time limit is not just a gimmick, but rather a system I play with in many ways. You can’t travel during nighttime. You need to restore stats every day.

22/ Some quests disappear or show up on specific days. Some actions are available only at specific hours. Days get shorter. You can care for the roads to ride faster. In many ways, time is a resource, and various tasks can be solved by spending it.

23/ Take the wooden lantern, as an example. You can buy it from a merchant, or hang out with a friendly carpenter to make your own, chatting with his neighbors. What do you need more right now? Money? Coins? Friendship? Without the time limit, you’d get limitless resources.

24/ The world of Roadwarden is rotting, collapsing, fading away, reaching a new form. With no time limit, it’s a playground, a place to be tamed according to your will. And the time limit was meant to turn it into a mystery, an interactive adventure. #MAMG23

#indiedev #pixelart #gamedev #screenshotsaturday #fantasy #rpg #pixel art #indie game #gaming #roadwarden

57 notes · View notes

volturiwolf · 6 months

Text

Ker si en delček vzela s seboj - Bojan x fem!musician!reader - part 1

A/N: Sentences/words written in italics are in their native languages, or to emphasize a few things.

A/N 2: AI was mostly used to write the lyrics, I changed a few things.

A/N 3: Not everything is accurate/according to what actually happened. Many things are made up, like this story.

A/N 4: This story and the way the characters play out have nothing to do with the real people. This is an imaginary story, in an imaginary world, with imaginary situations.

This series contains explicit/mature/adult content (use of drugs and alcohol, explicit material, swearing, etc).

“But I got my power in my hand / You hold no power over me

And I’ll take my flowers while I can / So let the love shower over me”

Dilja’s song had to be one of my favorite but most underrated songs of this year’s competition. She was not even 21,5 and her voice was pure power. She was performing right after us, so I got to watch her from the side, as soon as we got off stage because I didn’t want to miss a thing.

“Hey, (Y/N). Come on, everyone went back in the box.” Alex nudged me a bit to get my attention.

The ‘box’ wasn’t a box per se; it was a designated area for all the Eurovision acts to hang out during the Barcelona pre-party, surrounded by fans, other contestants, and past contestants. It had soft sofas, and tables full of snacks and drinks. Thank God, because I was already feeling my feet hurting from all the sightseeing we did yesterday.

“Give me a sec. She’s almost done.” I was moving around on my own, trying to be as respectful as I could during Dilja’s performance.

Once she finished, I clapped along with the audience and waited for her as she walked off stage to give her a congratulatory hug. We walked towards the box to meet the others as ‘Wild Youth’ was ready to take the stage.

It was only the first of the ESC Pre-Parties but we were all lucky to stay in the same hotel, so I got to meet the others in the hotel lobby two days ago. Our band, ‘Kitty Revival’, which was representing Greece, arrived a few days before the others, so we had some time to explore the city on our own.

I hadn’t been here in almost 9 years (tomorrow, it would be 9 years actually) and I was excited to see all the places I didn’t get to see when I was here on my last-year school trip.

Dilja and I got along from the beginning and got to do some sightseeing together. My sister also came along as she was the only one who spoke Spanish and I had once promised her to take her to Barcelona sometime in the future. She was only a year older than Dilja so they had a few things in common - more than Dilja and I actually.

Until now, I had met all of the acts at the pre-party, and I had made some friends - mostly Dilja, Mae, Iru, and Joker Out. Most of them were younger than me, but we still had a lot to talk about, like living the whole Eurovision experience - or at least, part of it.

Greece hadn't been participating in the pre-parties, but I really wanted to take the chance. It didn’t only mean song promotion, but also PR and getting to know the other participants. We practically had to beg the Greek delegation to let us participate in the pre-parties because they actually thought we shouldn’t.

As Dilja went to sit next to Mae, I went to sit next to my bandmate, Alkmini “Mini”, but Jan from JO quickly took over the seat. I raised my brow at him, but he just shrugged and pointed towards his old seat, next to Bojan, his bandmate.

I turned towards Mini. “We’ll talk later, okay?”

She simply nodded and I went to sit next to Bojan. The Slovenians had already performed first out of everyone else, so he was now stretching comfortably, but the moment he saw me, he moved a bit to make some space for me. “Thanks”, I murmured, hoping he’d hear it.

“You were amazing out there!”, Bojan tried to speak over Ireland’s song but he ended up screaming a tad too loud, trying to sneak his arm around me. Thankfully, I was used to the loudness and didn’t mind, but his arm made my heart race involuntarily.

I turned towards him to watch him smiling brightly, looking dazed and mesmerized, making me wonder how many drinks he had already. I could already see that Kris - who usually looked very mature for being the youngest one - was on the verge of being wasted already, screaming and dancing around. And we weren't even at the actual party that was gonna be just us.

Bojan was a natural flirt and could mesmerize anyone - I got that from the very first moment we met, and I wasn’t going to deny that he was so good-looking, and how he was slowly but surely making me let my guard down.

I leaned towards his ear. “How many drinks did you have already? We still have a long way to go until the end of the night. We still have an actual party to go to later"

“I had a few. Don’t worry. I can handle my alcohol.” His breath was tickling my ear, and I felt goosebumps as he laughed with himself. I couldn't help but smile at him.

He went on to talk about all the places they visited with his bandmates, the 'Wild Youth' and the ‘Sudden Lights’ guys today; some of which I had already visited. He kept telling me that he was 'too excited' to see all these amazing places and practice his Spanish with the locals.

"Though I wish you could come with us, as well. I mean you…your bandmates and you. Not you, you, as in you, (Y/N). You know what I mean?" Bojan was laughing awkwardly, trying to deal with his sudden embarrassment.

"I know. I wish we could come with you guys, but my bandmates insisted that we had some extra rehearsals for today. It's the first time we play outside of our usual area range, and everybody's kind of nervous about the whole thing. We mostly had people who speak Greek listening to our music and coming to our gigs, so this is totally different."

Bojan let out a giggle that made my heart thrill. "I totally get what you mean. Don't worry about anything. Your guitar skills are magija, magic, and your song is really good. I love hearing it. I love hearing you sing. Even if it's only in the back." Bojan moved a little closer at this point.

I didn't know how to feel about him at that moment. I wanted to lean closer to him, but it felt a bit out-of-character for me, and not entirely appropriate, given the time and place. I gave him an awkward thumbs-up and excused myself before I acted out of instinct that should not come to the surface.

I walked in front of Mini and gave her a signal to follow me. We walked to the bathroom, where it was significantly quieter than the box or the pit. I could think better here where I wasn’t overwhelmed with sounds, feelings, touches, and smells.

“Your cheeks are a tad red. You're flustered. What happened?” Mini had a talent for knowing how I felt without me saying a word, so there was no point in hiding the truth from her. We have been playing in the same band for over a decade now, so it made sense that she learned to “read” me well, even when I wasn’t trying to show any emotion.

“I think Bojan is flirting with me? Or not? I cannot really get him. He seems flirty with everyone - without actually flirting, you know? - but he’s more…expressive to me? He has confused me.” Maybe I was exasperating but the Slovene made me feel…things already, and I didn’t want to be just me, imagining things that weren’t there.

“Well, I do think he’s acting 'flirty' with you. And many others. But he hasn’t been like that with me, or Alex, or Dimi, or Stef. Just you from the band.”

“So? What do you think?”

“I honestly don’t know. Was he like that on the first day? When we went sightseeing?”

I tried to think of yesterday when we got into the mini-tour bus the party organizers booked for us and went around the town with Joker Out, Wild Youth, Sudden Lights, Tvorchi, Iru, Dilja, and Mae. We started early in the morning so we'd have enough time to see everything.

I was supposed to sit with the girls in the last row, but it was already taken by Jure, Jan, Conor, Andrii, and Jimoh. So, now we all had to split.

Iru and Mae sat together, and Dilja sat with my sister; Ed decided to sit next to our tour guide, with Callum and David close by.

I wasn’t annoyed by that; I was going to sit with Mini either way, but, at the last minute, she chose to sit with Dimi, leaving Alex and Stef to sit together. Okay, I would sit on my own - no issue with that.

Okay, I was annoyed; it reminded me of my school years, being the last one to get selected for anything. I couldn’t wait for the bus to start, so I wouldn’t have to think about being alone, not being chosen, and such, even if it wasn't supposed to be for long.

Against my initial thoughts, I felt someone sit next to me. I pretended I didn’t notice, but then they tapped my shoulder and I had to turn to look at them. To my surprise, it was Bojan who sat next to me.

I raised my glasses to look at him better. “What happened? Did your band abandon you, too?”

He looked around the bus, pointing at Kris and Nace who sat diagonal from us, in the front. “You could say that. They sat in pairs and I was left out. I hope you don't mind me sitting with you. I had nowhere else to sit."

So, he didn't choose to sit with me. It was just a convenience. "Yeah, no problem. Don't mind me." I turned around to look outside of the window; I really wished I had my headphones with me at that moment, but I left them in my hotel room.

Part of me was trying to focus on watching the city as we drove through it, but the other part of me was trying to decipher what Bojan was doing right beside me, without actually having to turn around and look at him.

“Hey, um…(Y/N), right?” Bojan spoke up and I had to turn around again.

“Yeah. And you’re Bojan. Bojan Cvjetićanin, right?” I raised an eyebrow at him. I thought he heard my name yesterday when we introduced ourselves to each other.

“Yeah.” He smiled widely. “I didn’t expect you or anyone to remember my last name actually.” He chuckled awkwardly.

“I remember everyone’s full name. Part of having an acoustic encoding and a photographic memory.”

“Oh, nice. So, (Y/N), speaking of photographic memory, do you know where we are going? I didn’t have time to look at our program.”

The program was given to us, specifically to know when and what we would do each day!

"Well, they'll drive us up to Montjuïc Hill first, so we can see the city from above. We'll visit the castle and then they'll drive us to the Botanical Gardens, then to Anella Olímpica, which is actually near the venue where the party with the fans will take place. Then, we'll visit the Spanish Village, then Parc Güell, and then, back to the city center. They'll leave us at Barri Gòtic, the gothic neighborhood and we have free time to visit whatever we want. I'll go to the Picasso Museum, Casa Battló, Casa Amatller, Casa Malagrida, and I'll have to find a way to go to Sagrada Familia, otherwise, I see myself unable to walk in the near future. Lunch is at 5 o'clock. The meeting point is Plaça de Catalunya, which is actually close to where we're having tomorrow's private party."

"Do they say what kind of lunch are we having?"

"They mention 'traditional Spanish cuisine', so I assume tapas, paella, gazpacho, and such."

"Oh, okay. I hope they got the memo about Nace on time."

I thought about it for a moment. "He shouldn’t eat gluten, right?”

“Yeah..? How do you know about that?”

“Because I cannot eat dairy and sugar, so I had to email them beforehand to let them know. So they sent me the menu to choose feasible options and let me know that there would also be gluten-free options for ‘another contestant’ with intolerance, just in case I had any other dietary restrictions. And I actually shouldn’t eat gluten because of my thyroid, but there aren’t enough gluten-free options in Greece, so...”

I just realized I started talking too much again and I stopped before I embarrassed myself more than I had already, but Bojan was looking at me…fascinated. His eyes were on me and he was perked up, waiting for me to continue my narration, but I thought that he hadn’t talked at all yet.

“So, have you ever been to Barcelona before?”

“As a band, no. Only Jure has never been here before. I was actually born here but we moved back to Slovenia when I was little, although I think I know a few Spanish but only now do I get the chance to speak with someone who actually speaks the language, you know? What about you? Have you?”

“Actually yeah, I have been to Barcelona before, but like almost nine years ago. Last-year school trip. We call it ‘triti lykeiou’, the third of high school. So it’s been some time, and even then, we didn’t get to see everything, or at least things that I wished we could see, like the inside of Sagrada Familia or the Picasso Museum.”

We continued talking for most of the time, from the moment we sat together on the bus till the moment we went back to the hotel, as Bojan became one of my ‘fellow travelers’ for the day, along with the rest of Joker Out, my band, and my sister. Bojan turned out to be a very pleasant person to talk to; it felt like I was talking to an old friend - effortless, familiar, meaningful. He was the most sociable and chatty out of all JO members, though, at times, I appreciated Jan’s more quiet company.

“I don’t know. Really. He was talkative, friendly. He may have seemed flirty and all that, but maybe it’s his way of communicating with others. Every time I try to speak with someone, they think I come out as flirting with them when I don’t. Maybe that’s just Bojan.” I shrugged, not caring to talk about it further.

“Okay. So, do you actually want to pee or…? We have been here for some time. The boys will be worried.”

“You can go back if you want. I’ll pee and I’ll be back shortly.”

I was quickly done, but stayed in the bathroom for a few more minutes, going through the photos I took yesterday. Bojan was in at least 90% of the group photos. He was obviously very photogenic, and he looked so smiley and happy. I took photos of every single one of our tour group, but Bojan would constantly find a way to get in, photobombing everyone’s photos.

I caught myself smiling, and I couldn’t deny that he was the reason I was currently smiling and silently laughing on my own. Going to his Instagram, I immediately saw he had uploaded on his stories and I was too curious not to click.

He had mainly reposted some videos from the Joker Out's official Instagram account with today's meet and greet, fans' photos, them getting ready for the pre-party, and a few short videos of them 'partying' before the audience pre-party.

And then, there was a video of my band playing on stage, but going through the video, it was mostly focused on me playing my guitar. It was…different, seeing myself through Bojan's eyes; the way his camera was moving from my guitar to my face, watching my 'concentrated' look.

I felt myself getting hot and my cheeks burning again. I felt a pain in my stomach - not sharp per se, but it was enough to make me notice it, accompanied by a light headache. I was pretty sure that it wasn't because of the few drinks I had; I could only attribute it to the tiredness of the past couple of days. I hadn't eaten well because I was embarrassed to eat in front of the others, and yesterday was slightly too hot outside.

I leaned against the wall, trying to take a breath, but I knew I just needed to sit down and everything would be okay. I exited the bathroom as calmly as I could and went back to the box to find a place to sit.

My seat next to Bojan was now taken by Mae, who was laughing loudly and enjoying herself, sliding her hand over Bojan's toned arm. I felt a bite of jealousy and sadness in my heart. Of course, there would be others interested in Bojan.

Bojan himself was smiling back at her while drinking from his champagne glass. He was having fun, and he seemed as interested in her as she was in him. The pain in my stomach became sharper now, but I didn't want to let others know how I felt, so I quietly took a seat on Alex's lap, as I usually did.

Alex wrapped his arms around my waist out of instinct - that's what we always did; that's how we all acted with each other in the band. We were all very open with each other, to the point we would even walk around naked when we were staying in the same hotel room or tour bus or each other's house if we felt like it. It wasn't forced; we were just comfortable with being close and intimate with each other.

They were all currently discussing possible places to tour in the summer if we got good feedback from the competition and the audience.

"What do you say, (Y/N/N)? Where would you like to go this summer?" Alex spoke calmly.

"Ideally, on vacation." Everyone snorted laughingly. "But if I had to choose, I'd say ask the people where they want us and we can go on from there. See if there's a way to arrange something."

"I guess that would be the most fair thing to do. Since we don't know where we stand with the people's view in this competition."

They all nodded, agreeing, before going back to talking about food. I sighed, trying to forget that I hadn't eaten anything since yesterday night, and snuggled my head in the crook of Alex's neck.

"Tough day?" Alex whispered as the others continued talking to each other.

"Tough day, you don't say anything." I was close with all the guys in the band, but Alex was more understanding and easier to talk to.

Alex glanced at me rubbing my tummy. "You're not on your period, right? That was last week?"

"No, it's not that. It's…" I looked towards Bojan and Mae, not so discreetly may I say, so Alex caught up quickly.

"Ha." He paused for a few seconds. "You're jealous. Who is it this time? Bojan or Mae?" I was open to my friends about my sexuality, but I never talked about it to others because I never had to or wanted to explain myself.

"Bojan. I don't know, Alex. I don't want to be just another participant thirsting over another one. Or be one of the people thirsting over him. I don't want to risk approaching him, only to be rejected. I'm tired of that."

Alex kissed me on my cheek and rubbed his nose against it. "I don't want to tell you what to do and what not to do, (Y/N). But I will tell you that we all take risks in our lives. We took a risk by being here, exposing ourselves to millions. If it's a risk worth taking, you should take the chance." He paused for a second. "And for what is worth, I think he may also be jealous now."

"How do you know that?"

"I've been glancing at him this whole time, and he hasn't stopped looking toward us. If looks could kill, I'd be chopped right now."

I turned my head to look at Bojan's side, and I saw he was already looking at us, mouth agape, and eyes wide open. We kept looking at each other for just a few seconds until he stood up and went away, probably towards the bathroom or somewhere else.

Could it be that he thought Alex and I were dating and he got jealous? No, no way. Bojan had a much too interesting life if I were to say so, looking through his social, to even care if I was with someone or not. Every participant was charmed by the Slovenian golden retriever. Everyone loved him. He had too many options to care about me and my life.

And he may have seemed interested yesterday, but today he was talking, drinking, and flirting with everyone like he was in his natural environment. I just had to forget all the things he made me feel, even for a day or two, and continue being civil with him because we had over 1 and a half months ahead of us until all this was over and we went back to our usual lives.

Though it was easier said than done, as, no matter how much I tried to avoid him over the next week during the Polish pre-party - unless it was a group activity or obligation, he always managed to be there somehow.

Was it a last-minute meet and greet with local fans before the pre-party? He somehow was close by, with the rest of his bandmates, probably having 'decided' to make a sudden meet-up of their own in the same area we did.

I tried not to notice how flirty and handsy he was with everyone, especially Noa when she showed up at the Israeli pre-party. She wasn't sent to perform, but as Israel hosted the pre-party, she must have been assigned as our co-hostess and presenter for the night.

I didn't know Noa was Bojan's soft spot, his weakness, until I saw a random post on Twitter, dated 2 months ago. It was uploaded by the official Joker Out account on Twitter, featuring Bojan. Noa was his weakness - his ‘weak point’, to be exact.

Now it made perfect sense why he seemed so infatuated with her and was pretty much following her around the whole night, except for when he had to go on stage and perform. And even then, he personally thanked Noa for her hospitality and how amazing and organized the party was.

I was really trying not to think of all that, not to think that the man I liked was flirting, touching, and partying with everyone else but me. I tried not to think that he could be going to bed with someone else, especially not me.

And then came Jere, going by the alias 'Käärijä'. And he was cute and kind and funny. And they immediately clicked with Bojan and they started spending as much time as they could together. And I would hang out with my bandmates, Iru, and Mae, and now also Alessandra, Alika, Teya, Salena, the 'Vesna' girls, and Elen, who went by the stage name 'Brunette'.

But it wasn't the same as it was that one day with Bojan, and though I was happy for him seemingly having found someone who actually made him happy, I couldn't help myself from wishing I was that someone.

Nevertheless, I tried to have as much fun as I could, without thinking of him or anyone else. And I did have fun, partying, singing, playing guitar, and going out with the other contestants, even Joker Out.

I was acting like nothing bothered me, and I was getting pretty good at it. In public. Because every time we got back to our hotel rooms, I fell into the abyss of my loneliness.

When we had a free day before the Amsterdam pre-party, everyone else went out, getting to know the city by night, but I decided to stay in my room, feeling too tired - emotionally - to have fun.

Lying in my bed, in my short, pink and wine-red nightgown, strumming my acoustic guitar, and humming, occasionally gulping some of the wine Mini bought a day ago, trying to find a new music or line for how I felt at the moment.

It wasn't usually hard to write a paragraph or two because it was usually a collective job, but I wasn't as emotionally charged before as I was now. Though, when I started strumming the chords, the lyrics started writing themselves.

You get on with life as that shy boy,

You're an adorable kinda person.

You like singing and playing hooky.

You like to contemplate life.

But when you start to daydream,

Your mind turns straight to him.

Sometimes I look at you and I look into your eyes,

I notice the way you think about him with a smile,

Curved lips you just can't disguise.

But you think it's singing making your life worthwhile.

Why is it so hard for you to decide which you love more?

Singing or living?

You like to use words about life.

But when you stop talking,

Your mind turns straight to him.

You like to hang out with me.

But when left alone,

Your mind turns straight back to him.

You hate crying and confrontation.

But you just think back to him,

And you're happy once again.

Oh, God. It was as soppy as it could get. But I bet Alex and Stef could probably make something good out of it. I wasn't good at the final editing and corrections, but I was good at laying all my emotions on the table and coming up with a rough layout of a possible song.

A rough knock on the door interrupted my thoughts. I checked the time on my phone. 01:36. Oh, no. I must have been too loud and someone got mad and came to complain.

I quickly and quietly tiptoed towards the door, waiting to be screamed at, for playing guitar at that time. I should have remembered that not everyone staying here was a Eurovision participant, and we were randomly put in our rooms. And it was probably late for some people.

Opening the door, I came face to face with a rather distressed Bojan. My heart fell at the sight of him. His hair was ruffled and stuck out all over the place. The dark circles under his eyes were more prominent than before, and his whole face was sunk.

"Hey, Bojan." I spoke quietly, aware now of how late it actually was. "What are you doing here? I thought you guys went out?"

He pointed into the room, and I took it as if he wanted to come in, so I took a step back to let him in. He walked heavily towards the small couch near the window, and let himself plop heavily into it.

We didn't speak for a few minutes, and the room felt heavy with awkwardness. I didn't know if I should speak or let him speak and explain why he was here at that time. I decided to break the tension.

"Hey, Bojan? Do you want me to bring you something to drink? Or eat? I have water, orange juice, cranberry juice, maybe some Greek koulourakia?"

He raised his eyes to look at me. His eyes were literally lost as if he was drinking heavily and managed to drive off somewhere he didn't know how he got there.

I took it as a signal to go through Mini and I's shared suitcase, and pick up a few things: a small pack of tsourekakia, a pack of oregano chips, an almond chocolate, and a can of Greek mountain tea from the fridge.

I placed them in Bojan's lap but he kept looking at me with those empty, lost eyes. "Eat up. You look like shit."

He let out a snort, smirking, as he awkwardly started opening the chips first. He snacked for a few minutes, occasionally closing his eyes, either out of pleasure or tiredness, I didn't know which one.

I looked at him closely, taking in his every perfect, little expression. He looked so small and fragile as he chugged down the oregano chips, like a little kid enjoying his afternoon snack. He saw me looking at him and offered me some of the chips.

"Thank you, but I can't eat them. They have milk powder in them." He shook his head and continued snacking.

He finished up and took the pack of tsourekakia in his hands, carefully examining the pack to understand what those were.

"They're like a small version of tsoureki, a Greek sweet-like bread which we eat as a snack, or sweet, or dessert. These have hazelnut praline in."

He shook his head again, as he opened the bag and grabbed one, throwing one in his mouth. The second he bit into it, his eyes rolled over his head, and I laughed at how much he enjoyed it.

I grabbed the can of tea and opened it before offering it back to him. "To balance the sweetness."

Our fingers brushed each other's, and it felt like it was forever ago when I last touched Bojan. I couldn't help my need to stare at him forever. His chocolatey eyes sparked even more now than they usually did, probably because of the alcohol in the man's system.

Out of a sudden, he grabbed my free hand and pulled me into his lap. I was so shocked and taken aback, that I could only look at him with wide eyes. Thankfully, he didn't spill any tea on us or the couch, because it would have been awkward to explain how the sofa and the rug underneath were stained with cold tea.

I noticed my nightgown had risen a bit, so I quickly pulled it down before my underwear was shown. Bojan wrapped one arm around me, while the other started moving up my thigh and below my nightgown, where I tried to cover myself up. My heart literally skipped a beat under his touch and our close contact.

We could only stare at each other. I was scared of doing anything that he may misunderstand and he was a bit too cautious to do or say anything. Or so I thought because he leaned forward, towards me. I didn't move, partially because I was frozen and partially because I'd been wanting to be in this position with Bojan since Barcelona.

His lips brushed against mine, nibbling my lower lip enough to make my heartbeat skyrocket. I wanted to give in but I quickly realized that Bojan wasn't actually in his right mind and it wasn't okay to take advantage of his loose state. So, I pulled away and pushed myself out of his embrace. He tried to resist but he was weaker in his drunk state.

"Bojan, I think you should go to your room now. You're drunk, you're not thinking straight, and you may start doing things you will most likely regret in the morning."

"I would never regret kissing you. Not in a million years. Not when that's the one thing I wanted to do from the moment I met you." He spoke for the first time tonight, his voice coarse and intoxicating.

I couldn't deny that I thought he was a bit obnoxious at first; he seemed too happy, and excited, and bouncy to be real. But when I actually got to meet and talk to him, he seemed down-to-earth, and lovely, and loveable.

"I'll be honest with you. I wanted to kiss you since that day in Barcelona when we spoke for the whole day. But I know it, and you know it too, that you have to come to your senses, and if you still feel the same, we'll talk about it sometime in the future, okay? Now you'll have to go to your room before our friends come back."

Bojan tried to stand up with wobbly legs but fell back on the couch. I facepalmed myself, knowing that getting him to stand up and go to his room, two floors above me, would be extremely difficult, even with using the elevator.

"What if…", he mumbled, "...I stay here for tonight? Please?" He gave me his best, doe-like, pleading eyes, knowing exactly where to aim to convince me.

I sighed, not wanting or being in the mood to argue with him. I looked at the oversized bed and tried to make some calculations for how we were gonna fit properly.

"Okay, but I won't be giving up the whole bed. I'm older and sensitive. We'll both sleep as far as possible from each other, capisci?"

"Si, signora." Bojan smiled brightly, and my heart beat faster. I swore that man would be the death of me. Was I too old at 26 to die over a younger man?

Bojan extended his arms towards me, expecting me to help him get to bed. I took a deep breath to calm my rising temper and walked over to him. I grabbed him from the waist, slowly pulling him up, and he put as much weight as he could on me.

Lucky for me, the bed wasn't too far away. Because Bojan, though considered short for a man, was about 10 centimeters taller than me, and he was both muscular and curvy, just my type. Pulling him up would be a bit easier if I wasn't feeling under the weather, because of my upcoming period.

I managed to get him to bed safely, lifting his legs to lie down, and pushing him a bit towards the middle, scared that he was gonna fall off at some point. I noticed he had his eyes closed already, and he was breathing heavily, so I assumed he had fallen asleep already.

I went back to the shared suitcase and got some painkillers, then grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, and placed them in the nightstand beside him. I personally never had a hangover because I always knew I couldn't handle alcohol at all, so I only drank in moderation. But I knew how awful a terrible headache can make you feel for the whole day forward.

I covered him with a blanket, as it was a bit chilly, even in the seemingly warm hotel. Bojan looked so peaceful, like a little angel, slightly smiling in his sleep. I took a picture in my mind and a picture in my phone, to forever remember that moment.

It was only then that I noticed I had a text message from Mini. I left my phone on silent mode so I never heard the text sound. "We're coming in 20. Do you want us to bring you something?" Sent 12 minutes ago.

It was a bit too late to text them. They would probably not see it on time. I walked carefully and quietly to the bathroom and called Mini from there.

"Ei, (Y/N)! Did you get my message? Do you still want us to pick up something for you?"

"Yeah, yeah, it's all good." I tried to whisper but also make myself audible. "Mini, can you do me a favor? Can you stay with Alex tonight?"

"Why? Did something happen?"

"Ehm, I...have a visitor tonight…"

"Omg, (Y/N)! Did you finally get laid?!"

"Wait! (Y/N) got laid?!" I heard my bandmates' voices in the background, whistling and making too much noise.

"No! No, it's not that. He just came to see me, and he was too drunk to get back to his room."

"Okay, tell me everything or I'll come over to see. Who is it? Is he cute? What does he look like?"

"Mini, I can't tell you who it is. That's…private." Nothing was private with these four, but I couldn't just out Bojan like that.

"Is it Bojan?" Alex spoke clearly on the phone.

I sighed before speaking. "Yeah, it's him. Please don't make it way bigger than it already is."

"That's what she said! But seriously, I'm just messing with you. And don't worry about Mini; she'll stay with me. Maybe one of us will get lucky tonight."

There were a few milliseconds of silence before Alex growled an "Aouts!", probably Mini's response to his comment. I snorted. Alex wasn’t that type of a guy; he just liked to mess up with his friends, and he knew that Mini wasn’t one to enjoy his pranks, so he did it more to her.

“(Y/N)? Where are you?” I heard Bojan whining from the room.

“Guys, I have to go now, okay? I’ll text you if I need anything.”

I got off my phone before anyone could respond, and I walked out of the bathroom. Bojan was lying on his left side, eyes half closed, looking towards the bathroom door. I moved closer to the bed, and he shot me a sweet, yet bright smile upon seeing me.

“Hey, are you okay? Do you need anything?” I wasn’t sure how to approach him or his state; I didn’t want to seem like I was hitting hard on him or that I was looking for any reason to get close to him.

“Can you please come over?” His voice was coarse and it gave me goosebumps.

I slowly crawled onto the bed, moving slowly to keep myself covered. Bojan’s eyes never left mine, as he watched me moving around and getting closer and closer to him.

“Closer. Please.”

I crawled again until I reached him and laid down beside him, facing him. His eyes still held an untold tiredness, but he still kept them open, as if I’d walk away the second he closed them once again. He moved his arms around me, slipping one underneath me and pulling me into his embrace.

His body felt warm and inviting, and I could now smell the scent of his clothes and his body: baby powder, musk, vanilla, and sandalwood, all mixed together in a scent that took over my mind.

His hands were moving up and down my back and arms in a comforting way, and he was breathing a bit more heavily now. I closed my eyes, enjoying the moment, though I knew I shouldn’t be getting that close with someone I had no future with - short-term or long-term.

Either way, we were from two different countries, living in two different worlds, and busying ourselves with different tasks. The only thing we had in common was that we were in a band, each of us representing their own country in Eurovision.

Just the thought of losing Bojan like that, expectedly and naturally, made me tear up, but I quickly forced myself to gulp my sadness and tears down. I didn’t want to upset him. This was a beautiful and emotional moment between us and I would ruin it if he noticed my wet, sunken eyes.

I calmed myself down and tried steadying my breath, though that led to me getting more and more sleepy in Bojan’s arms. And though I didn’t want to disturb his peace by staying there, I couldn’t bring myself to leave his soft touch, especially when Bojan laid his head on mine and started humming a - I assumed Slovenian - lullaby.

His voice, even when he was singing that low, was heavenly. I didn’t know what it meant, but I let myself enjoy Bojan’s rich, deep voice. He was singing and caressing my head, sliding his fingers through my hair and making my being go numb.

It only took a couple of minutes of Bojan singing lullabies for me to fall asleep in his arms.

#bojan cvjetićanin #bojan cvjeticanin x reader #bojan cvjeticanin fanfiction #fanfiction #joker out #jure maček #jure macek #nace jordan #jan peteh #kris gustin #kris guštin

24 notes · View notes

gz-missfit · 9 months

Text

Trying to write out something about these 2 from yesterday cause I'm ngl I'm still fucked up about the way the got separated </3

These 2 are gonna be the death of me at some point, and even now with a clearer mind I'm still not ready to cope with what happened pffff.

They couldn't see each other but still locked eyes, Pac having just received a message on his communicator from Fit about coordinates they've been searching the prison for to finally save their Walter Bob. They were quick to climb down the floors to meet up with said man, hushed whispers calling out to him as he focused harder on his work and mumbled his answers to them.

It wasn't until Pac's skin started to tingle that he realized they didn't have much more time to explore, and the glance he could throw at Mike's flashing form due to their potions running out told him he wasn't alone. All 3 quickly said their goodbyes to Fit, appreciating his help and leaving with hearing the apology of not being able to join due to needing to finish this job, the anxiety of losing the position creeping into the bald man's eyes.

The travel was quick, laughs shared as all 3 of them rode their horses, laughing at Richa's stumbling or an off-hand comment by Mike. It didn't feel like a mission to save their friend for a bit, but rather to just meet up with someone they hadn't seen for a while. As the 3 climbed up on the stoney shore dug up by hand and their sons eyes fell onto the edge of the jungle their stomachs dropped.

Blood.

A trail of blood leading behind the bushes and into the shaded areas deep in the woods that surrounded them. Pac could feel the anxiety claw at his throat, the scratches it made during the time they explored the prison and he got caught in a trap still being raw and sore causing his panic to rise even faster. Glancing at Mike told him his other half wasn't feeling the same type of fear though.

Mike's eyes were locked on the blood, his look dark and threatening like he was just waiting for the person they could blame for this to show themselves so he could explode in their face, and the hisses of anger that erupted from deep within the hybrid made Pac worry about him actually physically exploding. It wouldn't have been the first time.

A rustling of the bushes made Pac swing his head around, his eyes scanning the green landscape that surrounded the trio and it took him a few takes before he noticed the entity floating in front of him. Before he could even draw a weapon he started shouting towards his son, moving to cover him as Mike stepped closer again to see what the yelling was about, hiss dying in his throat like he was frozen as soon as his eyes locked onto the entity as well.

Pac's whole body shook as it approached, his anxiety already being at a high now shooting through the roof as he separates from Richas in a desperate hope to lead the entity away, begging it to follow him rather than go for his son. It was only then that he got a good look at the sword the being now held, it was a longsword. Shattered in the middle of the blade, being held together by seemingly nothing except for lines of code invisible to the naked eye. It shone green, emitting green particles that were glitching out as soon as they fell from the weapon.

Pac's breath caught in his throat.

Come to think of it, when was the last time he took a breath?

Mike's voice cut through the fuzziness of the panic attack that was currently trying to wash over Pac like a wave of ice cold water. He shook his head, trying to look for the location the voice was coming from only to feel a slice at his arm. The blade stung as it pierced his skin and he could feel an almost poison like magic run through every bit of his body. It set his veins ablaze for a split second and once he came back to himself he noticed the items he held dear in his hotbar were now scattered on the floor. Green glitching particles clinging to them like parasites.

He stumbled back, Mike's voice getting clearer now that the adrenaline had pushed his panic attack deep down into himself where it should've been in the first place, he finally finds his voice again as he calls for his other half. Desperate as he feels another slice of the sword in his back as he runs, he ends up getting caught in some bushes, closing his eyes tightly as he calls out to Mike that this is it. That he doesn't want to go but he can see that Mike's sword bounces off the being like it's nothing. That he needs Mike to get out of there, to stay alive.

Just as he was about a hit away from passing out, wounds scattered across his body sizzling with the same green particles that surrounded the items that got taken from him mere seconds ago and were now scattered across the floor, did he hear a thud. He carefully opened an eye just to rip them open as he saw the thing follow Mike now, his body desperately protesting the movement of his muscles against the plants he got caught in which were ripping at his wounds as he tried to move.

It all went black.

He was soaked.

He could feel Mike's breath against his arm.

He opened his eyes and instantly locked them with Forever, he could see the others mouth moving but nothing was being picked up by Pac's brain, an almost humming static getting louder and louder as he could feel the green particles in his wounds buzz with what he assumed was sick and twisted anticipation of what's to come.

Looking to his side he could see Mike, passed out after a nasty hit on his arm and hitting his head during the rough teleportation of their shared stasis chamber, Pac reached out through their mental link and physically. Hands shaking at the adrenaline wearing off and pain of his wounds becoming clearer to his mind. He activated Mike's warpstone and set it to the location of their safe room which they spent the day after their prison escape in, looking back he couldn't have told anyone why he did it. Just that he had a feeling that something was going to go horribly wrong and he needed to know Mike was safe. He needed to make sure he was safe. He needed to protect the person he chose to have a bond that goes beyond words with even if it meant sending them away.

Green eyes slowly opened and locked with Pac's dark ones, he smiled sadly as the particles that had embedded themselves in his wounds buzzed brighter setting his body ablaze with a yelp. While Mike's vision got clouded by the purple particles taking him to a location he didn't know. He could see Pac get drowned out by green ones, and before he could reach back for his friend both vanished. Mike's purple cloud taking him to a place of safety while Pac's green one ripped him apart and put him back together a few feet above a deep ocean.

As he fell he could do nothing but call for Mike, pulling at the strings that merged their minds together in a desperate attempt to hold on as the cold water forced a painful gasp out of his lungs. Tears pricked at the corner of his eyes but were quickly washed away by the angry waves that pulled him deep below the water, his lungs burning at the pressure of it and it forcing itself into his body as he desperately tried to gasp for air. He knew he was close to passing out, fear rushing to his mind of this being the end but a bitter smile making itself onto his face as he realized his son was safe, and with how he could now also feel Mike desperately rip at the strings that bound them together it told him he was safe too. He let out a bitter chuckle which forced more water into his lungs as he finally let his eyes fall close from sheer exhaustion, the last thing he did was call back to the ripping in his mind yelling for the others name only to have the strings snap before his eyes.

Everything was black now.

Tazers mind was now offline.

On the other side of the island a creeper/slime hybrid was now on his knees. Tears flooded from his eyes as he desperately called out to his best friend's name with a voice that's obviously been screaming for a bit now and was at the border of breaking through the abuse his vocal chords were taking. He couldn't even say goodbye, waking up from having passed out through a teleportation only to be met with Pac's eyes and see him be engulfed by a green cloud that made his wounds glow as Mike's warpstone engulfed him in a purple one, the teleport almost made him throw up as he quickly scanned his surroundings only to realize he was in their safe room. One where he'd spent endless nights of being shook awake by nightmares of Walter Bob being taken only to have Pac there by his side to ease the pain of each one.

The room felt empty without the others' presence, even with it's small size.

Mike could feel the anger bubbling in his throat at Pac for sending him away, not letting him stay, not letting him help. Before he could call out Mike was hit with a wave of coldness that made his bones clatter at how deep it ran into him, his eyes snapping wide open as he realized that the strings in his mind that connected him to someone he couldn't see right now were pulled tightly and being covered in a thick layer of ice that reached Mike's body in a phantom feeling. He scrambled to call back, to call Pac's name the same he had just called his but there was no response. His calls fell onto nothingness as his soulbounds voice echoed in his brain. Mike was panicked about to get up and try to get out of the room where Pac had sent him, only to freeze as a snap ran through his brain. He quickly tried to pull at the all familiar strings that connected to Pac, even with one of them asleep there'd be something transmitted among them even if it was just the heavy weight of a sleeping consciousness. But there was nothing. All he got was a TV static like buzzing and even that felt like utter silence in comparison to what he'd usually get in return.

So here he was now, fallen to his knees as he clutched the Pacman pendant he had held for decades close, Pac carrying the matching creeper one. His voice was hoarse and raw as nothing but sobs left his mouth in hitching painful breaths as his body dealt with the aftershock of burning lungs and freezing bones.

He was alone with his thoughts now, no constant stream of input from the person he chose to spend his entire life with, only a faint buzzing as he begged for that connection to still be there, nothing but silence and emptiness surrounding him.

Mike's breath hitched painfully as exhaustion and blood loss from his wound finally hit him, the adrenaline letting off and causing his body to be hit by waves of pain and exhaustion. He fell forward, landing in the soft padding of the floor of their safe room as his eyes started to fall shut he could do nothing but whimper as his body lost the energy to even fully cry. Hoping he'd wake up to someone else there, but also wishing he would never wake up until there actually was someone there. But he knew this world wouldn't be that kind to him. With a few last painful breaths his eyes finally fell shut as his cries fell onto an empty arena with no one to hear him.

Craft was now alone.

And he needed to be stronger than ever before.

#qsmp #qsmp tazercraft #qsmp pac #qsmp mike #qsmp writing #trying to put into words what they went through #was so much harder than i expected.#also trying to find a logistic way to #explain how they got seperated with the stasis chamber #was a bit of a struggle at first #anyways im still in emotional distress #void mumbling #text post

28 notes · View notes