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heauxzenji · 3 years

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Temporary

Sawamura Daichi x f!reader

Warnings: none, she’s fluffy 😌

Wc: 1.04k

A/N: As part of the Secret Santa collab- MERRY CHRISTMAS @ceo-of-daichi! Lydz my dear I hope you love your secret Santa fic! It’s only fitting of me to write something like this for the one human with a PhD. in Daichi Studies, and keep true to your office theme!!! I love you sm, and hope you enjoy this as well! Xoxo -Daisyclaus 🎅🏼🎄💖

What’s a better way to waste time at work than to gossip? Probably online shopping. Luckily the day was slow enough that you could do both.

“Do you guys think I could pull this off?” You whined, beckoning over two of your favorite coworkers- at this point, they were more like your best friends. You moused over the green cocktail dress, form fitting in all the right places.

“Oh most definitely!” They both had come up behind you, one seizing the mouse and hovering over the color options.

“Don’t you think it’d look better in red?”

“Well green is a Christmas color too….”

“Why are you wearing colors anyway? Just get it in black!”

She was right, black was always the way to go. And the way the sheer parts over the arms looked, it would definitely leave you as the best dressed of the night. With 3 clicks, it was in your cart. You all mused over shoes and accessories as snow fell beyond the window of your building. You kept on looking and typing, the three of you giggling and discussing the night ahead- Christmas karaoke, department-wide white elephant, and of course, the eggnog, which was always made very special with the addition of your purse flask.

“Are you bringing a date to the Christmas party this year?”

It was an innocent question- just office chatter. Everyone at your job was talking about the yearly event. It was a hit every year, yet it always seemed like you always came up short when it came time for all your coworkers to introduce their significant others to your department head.

“This would be year three that you haven’t,” one chimed in. “I can always give my cousin a call…”

Rolling your eyes, you swiveled around in your desk chair to face them. Your coworkers were like your left and right hand, and though you adored them- they already had wonderful and adoring partners. There was no way they’d be able to know your pain in the dating pool.

“Well I haven-“

Just then, he walked past.

Back in November the mailroom at your office had hired a temporary delivery guy. It had only been a month, but the simple song and dance played out exactly the same every day: he would roll the cart up and down the floor, stopping at every department before ending at yours. Your desk always seemed to be his last stop, and without fail, he would hand you your mail with a smile and say “special delivery!” Simply put, the mystery mailman made you swoon.

You don’t know where you summoned such courage, but it flew out of your mouth without hesitation right as he stopped at your cubicle.

“I’m going with the temp!”

A palpable silence fell between everyone in the conversation. The quickness of your bold statement had your face burning as heat pricked its way down your entire body. Your coworkers gawked. Picking up their jaws from the floor they turned to face your ‘date’, whose face was just as awashed with confusion as everyone in the moment.

“Yep! We’re going together!” You continued in your most convincing voice, eyes widening in some sort of signal that he was meant to catch on to. “It kinda just happened yesterday over coffee- I offered to be his plus one since he’s so new, y’know?”

Confused, your team looked over at the temp, who was just as much of a deer in headlights as you. But god, you only needed him to play along- he could save you if he just knew....

“Um, yeah, yeah we are!”

You tried not to let out a loud sigh of relief that he was picking up what you were putting down. Your knight in perfectly pressed khakis had arrived.

“I uh- I don’t have any mail today,” he started, a hand finding the back of his head.

“I just came to um-“ he looked around your desk. He didn’t even know your name. You never found out his name! Internally, you were screaming. Your eyes darted to a name plate at your desk as you loudly cleared your throat to get his attention, your coworkers could only wait to see how this was going to play out.

“I just came to uh, to check on Y/N, and remind her that I’m going to pick her up at 7:30!”

He was saving your life. He really was a hero.

“7:30’s perfect,” you mused, pretending to scrawl your address on a sticky note. Instead, you wrote a kind ‘thank you :)’ and slid it into his pocket.

“I’ll see you then,” he replied, giving a curt wink and wave.

Almost as quickly as he was there, he and his cart were gone. Your coworkers couldn’t help but laugh at your display.

“Woooow!” One exclaimed in a whisper yell. “I didn’t think you had it in you”

“She has been talking about him for weeks,” the other snickered.

They were believing you… for now. Everything was peaceful and you were able to go back to work with silly conversations about what you’d sing on karaoke at the party, and how everyone knew you could make a better drink than any of the bartenders they would hire that night. You turned back to your desk to hit submit on your order- even if you weren’t going to go with him, you couldn’t pass up an outfit like this. Someone was going to see you in it, even if it wasn’t him. You’d started on some mundane tasks again, working to meat your pre-holiday deadline, when you’d suddenly heard your name.

It was him, yet again. He had come back your way, carrying a piece of mail. As much as you wanted to be giddy, you knew it was nothing. You were so certain it was nothing.

“Sorry, I forgot this.” He placed the envelope directly on your desk, your name scrawled across the front in messy handwriting. “Special delivery,” he commented like always- but this time there was emphasis on the special. His smile appears warmer than normal as he urged you to open the mystery letter.

‘I’d love to join you at the party. Maybe we could even grab dinner before. Send me a text! -Daichi

I figured we should know each other’s names... that’s important!

Ps, you’re going to look beautiful in that dress.”

His number was at the bottom, and a poorly drawn pine tree- the one that’s just little lines in a triangle, with a mangled star on top. You looked up at him in shock. He simply winked and walked away. As you returned to work, you couldn’t contain the heat on your cheeks or the swelling inside your chest.

Maybe, just maybe, you had witnessed your first Christmas miracle.

#secret santa collab 🎅🏼#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #Daichi x reader #haikyuu fluff #hq fluff #daisy goes uwu 🧁

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astralhugs · 4 years

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RFA with an MC who doesn’t sleep because she’s on her phone too much

There are two types of people in this world, one who goes on their gadgets too much and the other, liars.

Enjoy~! Sorry I didn’t post last week D:

requests open~

YOOSUNG

* okay aside his gaming addiction, this boy rarely goes on social media.

* Probably has a facebook account just to login to LOLOL easier or sumn.

* Would usually use his phone for cooking recipes and lolol

* But you were the opposite

* You were on the phone 24/7.

* When he’s asleep, you’re on your phone.

* You’re at a theatre with him? You’re on your phone.

* At first he was just doing some positive thinking like, “Oh, maybe she has work or something.”

* But then when you guys went to bed a bit late, you promise you’d go to bed right away.

* Woo its 3AM and you’re up.

* On your phone

* And guess who caught you.

* Dearest Kim Yoosung.

* “Mc, sleep. Going on your phone too much will damage your eyes.” he worriedly said.

* You pout but then he gave you those darn puppy eyes and you cant say no?????

* In the end you gave up and slept

* It honestly felt good.

* Yoosung tells you about how he feels like he’s being ignored whenever you’re on your phone too long.

* “I’m not saying to not go on your phone, but um...its not good to go on it too long, you know?” he says.

BONUS :

* To my lovely readers who are students, Yoosung has something to say to you~ (will be doing this for the whole RFA mwah)

* “Hiii!! Its Yoosung~~ I love you so much but please don’t go on your phone too much! You should study hard but also take breaks, not only study breaks but breaks from your phone as well, I’m a student as well so I get you TT, if you go on your phone less I’ll kiss you~ hehe, i love you stay safe~”

ZEN

* FIRST OF ALL

* HES JEALOUS OF THE PHONE RIGHT NOW

* SECOND

* He never really realized because of practice and stuff until he saw that you were up???

* Watching netflix???

* On your phone???

* WHYS THE BRIGHTNESS SO HIGH OMG THE RADIATION

* “MC.” he grabs the phone gently, surprisingly you didn’t say anything to him. He then realized you were asleep.

* He was wondering how long you’ve been doing this.

* The next day he’d definitely ask you about it though.

* You’d explain your reason and stuff.

* “I understand but staying up until 3AM? Babe, do you know how bad the radiation from your phone is to your face?” he asks.

* Would try to make you go to sleep early with him.

* ‘No phone hour’ is set one hour before you both go to sleep.

* You both would just chat and have fun like maybe doing facemasks together and doing each others hair and such.

* Loves the attention he’s getting from you whenever you’re not on your phone.

BONUS :

* “Hey babe! Is it very late at your place? If yes then WHY ARE YOU STILL UP? LIKE I SAID ABOVE, DO YOU KNOW HOW BAD RADIATION IS FOR YOUR SKIN????? If its morning and you’re still in bed, get up and do some exercises! I would do some with you but I have practice, you know lying in bed all day isn’t healthy so you should try doing some stretches to keep your body healthy during all of this pandemic thing. I hope you take care, see you soon, love you, mwah<3”

JAEHEE

* Stays up till 3AM

* Doesnt really mind

* She got coffee for both of you.

* You’re answering guest emails (secretly watching netflix oop) while she’s doing all of Jumin’s piled up work.

* Zen’s at the back frustrated about how both of yall aren’t getting sleep.

* But on Fridays, Jaehee and you would try to stay away from gadgets for at least an hour before bed.

* “MC, its almost 2 we should head to bed soon.”

* Its either her who reminds you about the time or the other way around.

* Yall got each others back its no problem lol

* But fr yall both seriously need sleep

* Who am I kidding its 11.42PM rn

* In the morning, she’d prepare coffee for both of you so yall good.

BONUS :

* “Hello MC, I hope you’re having a lovely day, I know that you‘re having trouble going to sleep and honestly, I can say the same, with all the piled work Mr. Han gave me, I’m suprised I’ve even gotten at least 3 hours of sleep, but please don’t be like me. Sleep is important, I’ll sleep right after you sleep, promise! Take care!”

JUMIN

* Its either he sleeps early as fuck or he doesnt sleep at all.

* Ya know being director of C&R tingz

* Anyways he sees that you’re still awake

* ‘I thought she finished replying to guests the other day?’ he thought to himself before entering her office

* Yes you have your own office in Jumin’s place, we been knew.

* “Darling, its almost 1AM why are you not asleep?” he asks worriedly.

* Well you explain it and if it was a stupid reason like about a series then he isn’t having any of your bullshit and takes you with him to bed.

* If it’s reasonable he’d understand but wouldn’t recommend you staying up at ungodly hours.

* Sometimes would see you popping up in chatrooms and he’s like??? tf???

* Would recommend you to see a doctor to see if there were any problems as to why you weren’t sleeping well.

* Would stay by your side when you’re in bed and is asleep.

* In the end, he’d definitely recommend you not to go on your phone half an hour before going to bed so thats that.

* TURNS ON SCREEN LIMIT ON YOUR PHONE.

BONUS :

* My love, is it late there? If it is, please get some sleep soon. I wish I could cuddle with you right now and help you go to sleep but I’m out of country. I hope the body guards are keeping you safe and I hope you’re staying indoors. My love, please wait for me, I love you.”

SEVEN

* OKAY

* FIRST OF ALL

* saeyoung ilysm

* BUT HE HAS NO RIGHT TO SCOLD YOU HERE

* HE’S NOT ALLOWED TO HAVE A SAY IN THIS

* MAN STAYS UP AT UNGODLY HOURS ALL THE TIME

* AND EATS AND BREATHES CHIPS AND PHD PEPPER

* HE IS NOT ALLOWED TO SCOLD YOU, ITS SUPPOSED TO BE THE OTHER WAY AROUND

* nah he’d still scold you though.

* He doesn’t care if he stays up for 287373 hours

* But you????

* No.

* Its bed o’clock MC time for bed.

* Has robocat set up to put you to sleep.

* Like it would remind you to go to bed and once you’re in bed it would play some soft music.

* Sometimes, it would also play Seven talking like ASMR.

* If robocat sees you on your phone it would send a notif to Seven immediately so thats that.

* I still think hes not allowed to have a say in this.

* But wbk seven loves mc more than he loves himself :(

BONUS

* “drum roll!!!! ITS ME! Your lovely 707! MC! Why are you not asleep? I know, coming from me it sounds stupid but you should be sleeping because its not good for your health! I wish I could cuddle you some more but I’m on a mission right now! But don’t worry~! I’ll go back soon and we’ll cuddle alot! Stay safe and I love you!!”

THANK YOU FOR READING!! If you guys like this, I’ll try post V’s, Saeran’s and Vanderwoods :)

Requests are open please send some~!

Have a great week <3

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watchingspnagain · 3 years

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Meet Mace

Hi, I'm Mace, and this is my Intro Post. Ab Spectando Condito and all that. (I sometimes channel Livy when I'm nervous, don't be alarmed.) And I'm nervous because my memory is absolute crap so I can't actually remember all the details here, even though this all started only, like, two years ago. It's also hard to wrap my head around the idea of trying to describe this thing that Lor and I have started (created?) and how and why it has become so important. So, well, bear with me.

Okay, here goes: For years friends had been telling me that I *needed* to watch Supernatural; it was right up my street, they'd say. But I kept putting their recommendations aside, thinking that, sure, Dean from Gilmore Girls is in it and he's adorable, but that other guy looks like a frat boy cliché, and overall the show seemed like it was probably Buffy but with Dudes (and I LOVE Buffy and will brook no substitutions or messings-with The Buffy). Eventually I decided to give it a try anyway, a decision wholly based on how hilarious the memes were. Maybe the non-Dean guy (His name is Dean? *His* name is Dean? Wait, no, that's not...but why tho?) isn't so bad? The first attempt didn't go well: my husband, who is so very not interested in SPN, was away on a business trip and I waited until my then-10yo son was in bed, crawled into bed myself, and started the first episode. At night. Alone. I made it 10 minutes before actually saying out loud, "NOPE" and turning it off. Cripes, that first episode (and most of the first season, really) is actual, full-on scary! I mean, what. Why have Handsome Boys making Hilarious Quips on a show that I can't watch because I'm too scared?! Sort of rude, to be honest.

And that was it for, I think?, a couple of months or so. Then - and this is one of the places where my memory gets foggy (I tried three times to type that correctly and the first two came out as "goofy" and honestly yes that too) - the watching of SPN was mentioned on another site I spend much amounts of time on. I suspect Lor remembers the details much better than I do, but somehow we starting talking about how we both had been thinking about watching SPN for a long time, but hadn't actually done so because past attempts on both sides had resulted in fright and flight.

Now, Lor and I have been friends on that other site for several years, but never before really corresponded much outside of that site's chat-like forum section. I pretty much admired her from afar, as it were, and held her as a Fantasy BFF in my daydreams - she was (and still is to this very day) cool and *so* clever and smart and had (and still does to this very day) such a brilliant knack for turning a phrase and I admired (and still do to this very day) her wit and snark and general amazingness, but, again, mostly from afar. So when we somehow decided to try again with Supernatural, but this time together, I was ridiculously excited. I had no idea, though, just how life-changing that decision would be. We bonded, it seemed, almost instantly over our love (second time is the charming one, I guess?) of the show and over discovering how much we have in common with each other. It's comical, almost, just how alike we are in all kinds of areas: similar childhood experiences, nearly identical (like, eerily so sometimes) tastes and opinions on all manner of things, and we're essentially twins in our list of Things That Make Our Anxieties Spike.

We started off watching the episodes separately (I think I was a little ahead of her for a bit? Gah - stupid faulty memory) and then typing up our comments and emailing them to each other, then responding with comments on our comments. And it quickly became one of the highlights of my days, getting those emails, reading through her clever and hilarious remarks, feeling pure glee when we had almost exactly the same thoughts - sometimes even typing the exact same phrases, word for word. This, then, at some point, evolved into watching the episodes at the same time and live-texting each other, which means that now we very often are typing exactly the same reactions, word for word, and then geeking out at how SAME we are in real time. Of course we have differences, too, but even those seem to complement each other: she's the Hufflepuff to my Slytherin; she's a Dean girl and I'm a Sam girl (well, and also a Crowley girl - Sam girl in the streets and Crowley girl in the sheets?); she likes Wuthering Heights, which slightly baffles me but, okay, because we both agree that MacFadyen is the best Darcy.

We had big plans to have a meet-up to watch the series finale together. See, we've never actually met in person. We became friends online, then became closer friends through this mutual SPN watch, but that's also online. And so I've never been face-to-face with my best friend. Because the meet-up for the finale didn't happen, of course. Because Covid, of course. For both of us, anxiety added a special sauce of NOPE to leaving the house this last year and we've both, I think, been pretty much isolated, staying home and not having much interaction with others outside the other members of our households. Which means that our SPN watching and our growing friendship took on an even greater meaning and importance for me. I'm honestly not sure that I could have handled the massive stress and anxiety of this last year without Lor's friendship. It just feels...natural, at this point, that I spend my days texting her back and forth about all sorts of things, the small and mundane to the big and important. Lor has become a huge part of my life and if a full day were to pass by without talking to her, I'd feel that loss fairly keenly. On some level it seems pretty bizarre that I owe such a debt of gratitude for this amazing friendship to a TV show, but here we are. This show, its characters, and the actors and writers who have made them so outstanding and special? Well, I owe them all incalculable amounts of thanks.

Anyway. So.

We're now on our second go-round with our SPN watching (because I think neither of us can now even begin to fathom a life in which we're *not* watching this show together), and Lor, (hello - did I mention she's brilliant and amazing?) low-key drops the idea that we should be blogging our live-text conversations. We've talked before about really wanting to have a record of *waves hands around* all this, and a blog seems like a great way to do that, regardless of whether anyone else ever reads it. I'm content for it to be an open and ongoing love letter to Supernatural and to our friendship, even if it remains a largely unread one.

And finally, here are a few Thing You Should Maybe Know About Me:

I'm a farmer's daughter with a PhD in Classics, a one-time professor, turned stay-at-home mom, turned part-time librarian, turned Classics prof. again, living in the Midwest with my husband, 12-going-on-80yo son, and a goofball of a golden retriever.

I love reading as much as I hate housecleaning, and I'll read pretty much anything unless the dog dies or the child gets hurt.

I also really like knitting and sewing and one of my very favorite things is to make ridiculously-tailored Halloween costumes for my son (thank the gods he's totally into it, too). I missed my calling to be a cosplay designer. Maybe in retirement...

I fall in love easily and fast and hard for fictional characters, especially the ones that are 1) evil and/or generally villainous, 2) tormented, 3) super smart and/or skilled, 4) filthy rich, 5) completely unattainable, and if they're all of the above, Holy. Damn.

#watchingspnagain #watchingspnagain intro #watchingspnagain mace speaks

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just-anka · 3 years

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I realised I haven’t really regularly posted here since like... I don’t even know, September? It’s been a while, anyway. A lot happened, and I now feel like actually writing a post for the first time in a while, so here goes haha. The first bullet point is entirely work waffle so feel free to skip. Apologies in advance for the fact that this post will probably reach novel length by the time I’m done.

• I took a week off in late September before Ben started his new job so we could go to the mountains for a bit, and it was a much-needed little break from work. And pretty much right after I got back, work got completely mental - nothing bad as such, just one thing after the other, loads of deadlines, so many important things. First I was finishing up data for a paper (first authorship was being debated which is partially why I threw myself into the job so much, but it looks like it’ll be the PhD student before me’s now, which is how it should be tbh, it’s much more hers than it is mine), then the date for my first committee meeting was set and I suddenly had only two weeks to prepare (did not think it was going to be that short notice, whoops, had a very stressful two weeks but all went well - for us, this meeting means presenting our research plan and preliminary data to a committee of four professors so they can give you input, it’s not suuuper formal but still pretty stressful), then I had to write the report for that (I love writing so that one was okay), then there was suddenly a lot to do for a really important cooperation with a company (big money responsibility which stressed me the fuck out), and then, just as I thought I was pretty much done for the year, I realised I needed my lab book up to date for my end of year meeting with my PI (which wouldn’t be such a big deal, except I didn’t have a lab book at the time. Never got around to starting one. So nine months of lab book were written within another very stressful week). Whew. Even writing this out makes me feel like that was a lot haha.

• After the end of year discussion, I really was done for the year - I officially worked until the 23rd but there was not that much actual work happening, and with the pressure off after months, I properly crashed for a few days. Ben left for England on the weekend after to see his family for christmas etc, and I spent most of that weekend sleeping and doing very little. It was needed. Then my mum came to visit me for the holidays and we had four really lovely days together, also involving a lot of chilling (the only actual thing we did was that magical winter hike that I posted some pictures of the other day).

• And now I’m skiing! I was planning to go to England as well for NYE to see Ben’s family, but with the corona situation escalating again lately I decided it was too risky for just a few days. So I made a last-minute plan to go skiing by myself instead, because all that involves is a 2 hour train journey. I’m actually staying in a hotel too, which I’ve never done by myself before, I’m usually a dorm in a hostel type of person, but well. Covid has changed a lot of things :D trying to stay safe and away from people, which is of course not entirely possible in a ski resort, but it’s going okay. The skiing itself is great, it’s really nice having some time to go at my own pace and a few days in a row. Today was day 4 and I’ve really found my groove again (more on that later). There’s not much snow though so not many off-pisteing opportunities :/ I’m staying until Monday and then it’s back to work on Wednesday.

• Speaking of skiing, we’ve got season passes this year, my first season and Ben’s second. We’ve just been doing on the weekends so far - since the 21st of November I just realised while looking back in my calendar! That’s one hell of an early season start haha. We did just one day three weekends and then one full weekend right before Ben left. The first few days were bloody hard. For context, I learned to ski before I learned to walk and loved it as a child, then stopped for a few years because I felt like I wasn’t progressing anymore and was getting bored with it, basically. Then last January I went to France with Ben and his skiing friends and got introduced to freeriding and the idea of ski touring, and now I’m back to loving it haha. I’d ideally like to not have to resort ski anymore at one point (meaning touring) because I know it’s terrible from an environmental standpoint but... idk. It’s currently my only option, and I love it a lot, so I guess it feels okay? Anyway, since I learned to ski so early, it’s the one sport that I’ve always been pretty good at and like, never get scared, at least not on piste. Until this year. The first three individual days were just all kind of horrible, the conditions weren’t ideal with very hard surface and tons of ice and pretty busy slopes, and only steep terrain open as well (Engelberg, our “home” resort - we have a season pass that encompasses a bunch of resorts so we’re not limited to one - is literally dead flat beginner’s slopes, which weren’t open in the beginning, or red runs that should be black and black lol). Pairing loads of ice with my old skis which barely have an edge anymore was... not ideal. I was so scared constantly and it made me like I lost all my ability etc etc. But yeah, turns out I just needed a few days and some easier conditions to get back into it, and now ice and steep stuff and everything is fine again. Who would’ve thought. (a sensible person, probably).

• But then, the full weekend we skied in December was awesome! Saturday already felt much better and then it snowed a bunch over night and Sunday we spent all day powder skiing, basically. I learned SO much and just had an absolute ball! Definitely one of the best days skiing I’ve had, and one of the best days recently in general.

• Plus that whole weekend was just lovely, car camping in a campsite full of huge campervans was pretty fun :D I love the looks we get when people see the car and clearly wonder where we sleep. And we’ve got our setup perfected for winter now so both the nights were toasty. Friday night we had dinner in “bed” watching a movie, and Saturday night we sat in the little kitchen (the campsite has it open for everyone, but everyone else there has a camper, so it doesn’t seem to be used much) drinking tea and playing cards and ahh. Camping in the mountains. My ideal life eh? (though the weekend before this wonderful one, we got snowed in because it dumped over a metre over night completely unexpectedly and that was stressful as hell, but I think that’s a story for another day, if ever, I’m kind of trying to forget that day :’D)

• Yesterday I also finally took the plunge and ordered new skis. Been debating for ages which ones to get but I’ve finally decided and I’m now very excited!

• Ok this post so far reads as “work and skiing” which is pretty much what November and December were and probably what January is going to be too haha. Ben and I want to ski another week together end of January as well, and there’s some big exciting work things coming up as well.

• Even though I have to admit, now that I’m on a break, I’ve spent a lot of time dreading work and questioning my career choices and all of that lark... sigh. I love my job most of the time, but I kind of hate having a job? If that makes sense? Sometimes (okay a lot of the time) I just wish I had more time for other things that I care about. But I also now I’m lucky to have that job, especially this year, and lucky to have a job I don’t hate, and get to do a lot of fun stuff on the side, even if it often means little sleep and downtime.

• Speaking of things I care about, I was on a proper roll with writing for a few days before and after Christmas. It’s ebbed off again a bit, but it was still pretty cool, and my totally-useless-all-cheese-project is now 33,000+ words long and like, half-way there story wise. Had a lot of fun with that.

• Lastly, Ben is still in England, and he’s coming back next Sunday, and I can’t wait! I miss him so much when we’re not together it’s actually silly. Although it’s less stressful this time than the last few times because... we live together, his work just offered him an unlimited contract from January, and I’m stuck here for another 2-3 years, so it looks like we’ll actually get to be in the same place for now. Which is all I wished for last year, and I’m so damn grateful - that stability really is the best thing 2020 has brought for me. And, as he said, even though we were apart for the start of the new year, it will hopefully bring more time together than any previous year ♡

• Okay I think this is long enough now, if you actually made it until here you’re a hero and I will try and post a bit more regularly again now to avoid this size of mind dump :’D I hope you all got into the new year alright, it feels very strange to me that it’s 2021 because I actually slept through midnight on new year’s for the first time since I was tiny haha but I’m sure a lot of people feel the same way!

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lovehugsandcandy · 4 years

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One-on-One: Rematch (Part 4)

A/N: Thank you all for reading and leaving such nice notes-they totally inspire me and keep me going! You all are the best. Last part (there might be some smaller one-shots in the future but, for now, this finishes the posting binge, apologies for clogging your feed). (Part 1, Part 2, Part 3)

Pairing: Colt x MC, ROD

Length: ~3,700 words

Rating: R (Swearing. References to a fight.)

Summary: When Langston made it to Nationals, Ellie planned on spending the entire time studying in her room. It didn’t end up quite as planned.

Ellie told herself she would not think about it.

She would study, cram, finally understand the driving force between enthalpically-driven reactions, and get her entire life back on track.

At least that’s what she told herself.

But somehow time passed and she moped and she never truly understood organic chemistry. Instead, she could only recall a different type of chemistry, far removed from textbooks and lecture halls. However, like during labs, if the reactants went bad or if she made one wrong move, it all exploded, flames bursting out of flasks and bunsen burners until she had to leap back, fire licking at her eyebrows.

But this explosion was worse. Instead of singed hair, everything ached, with the gaping hole in her heart worst of all, throbbing incessantly, pain making it impossible to study or sleep or think.

Even during team practice, her limbs were unsteady, heavy. She didn’t look like someone who was preparing for an appearance on national television. She didn’t feel like someone who was practicing for the biggest halftime show of her life.

She felt like someone who had no clue what way was up... or which way her life was going.

She knew she shouldn’t look for him before the final game but, regardless of how hard she tried to stay focused on anything else, her eyes found the court, searching every single red-and-gold jersey running by or shooting layups. None were him.

The stadium was filling, fans filing into the seats, chatter and excitement echoing off the parquet floor. She tuned it out and stretched, getting ready for the start of the game and the most important performance of her life; the plod of feet and squeak of sneakers made their way over, stopping at her side. Ellie didn’t look up at the shadow that fell over her outstretched leg. Her quads were tight, and she needed to-

“What happened, Ellie?”

She glanced up and gasped. “What the hell happened to you?”

“What does it look like?” Logan’s smile was chagrined, a stark comparison to the massive shiner that darkened the skin around his left eye. “Kaneko’s violence-free streak ended.”

“He punched you?!?”

“We had a... disagreement.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“Hey, I gave as good as I got.”

“He needs freaking anger management.”

“Ha. He’s in anger management. Coach has had him going since he started with the team.” Logan dropped to the ground next to her, wincing as his weight fell on his hand before sinking fully to the court. “You were doing a hell of a lot better than the clowns in there, though.”

She studied the floor. Colt wasn’t her problem anymore.

“You guys break up?”

“We were never together. We were…” She took a deep breath. “We were just hooking up.”

“Ha. Really.”

“Yeah,” she chided. “Really”

“That’s bullshit and you know it. Colt doesn’t do anything by half. It’s never ‘just’ with him.”

“It was never gonna work. I know how you basketball players are-”

“Hey!”

She continued as if he had never spoken, talking fast as if speed of speech directly correlated with the strength of conviction. “We were hooking up... and now we’re not.”

“Why?”

“What?”

“Why aren’t you hooking up anymore?” Logan looked curious, sprawled next to her.

“Jesus, is this really everyone’s business?”

“I’m-”

“Why does it even matter?!? He’s some massive basketball talent who is gonna move to Utah and what about me then?”

“Uhh, ok. ... what about you then?”

“I’m not fucking moving to Utah! I’m top of my class and I want to go to grad school and it was never gonna work anyway so there’s no point in dragging it out-”

“Uhh…” Logan’s mouth dropped, shocked and befuddled and concerned, but she was too far gone to stop now.

“And all you basketball players are the same-”

“Hey! I resent-”

“So this meant nothing to him and I’m sure he can find another fan to hookup with and I think...”

A heavy hand on her shoulder made her stop; she blinked the world back into focus. “You done?”

“I can keep going.”

“Dear God, please don’t,” he begged. She chuckled despite herself as Logan exhaled deeply through pursed lips. “There is so much to unpack there that I don’t even know where to begin. How the hell- did he talk to you about the Jazz?”

She inspected her hands. “No. I... the scout was in the box at the semifinals.”

“Yeah... Colt hates that guy. We both do, actually, one of the very few things in this world we agree on. There is no way in hell he’s signing with the Jazz. I don’t think he’s signing with anyone right now.”

“No?” She blinked at him.

“I mean, his mom is on his ass to finish school but... isn’t this something you should talk to him about?”

She shrugged. “It didn’t seem worth it. The entire thing meant nothing, so, why bother?”

“Ellie, he gave you his box ticket. He never has anyone cheering for him up there.”

She narrowed her eyes.

“No, really,” he protested. “I mean, you know the guy. I’m not sure his antisocial behavior has given him a rabid fan base.” She looked down at the ground, turning Ingrid’s warning and Logan’s words over in her head. Finally, he interrupted her seizing brain. “But what do you want?”

“Huh?” She blinked at him.

“You’ve gone on and on about Utah and him being some big name basketball star but you never really said anything about what you want.”

She blinked again. What was he talking about? “I want... I have a plan.” She gnawed on a thumbnail. “I’m going to graduate summa cum laude, hell, valedictorian unless Ingrid beats me. I’m gonna get into the best PhD program in the US and I’m gonna complete my post-doc in the new mechanics lab that is gonna open up back home and-”

“I’m hearing a lot about what you’re gonna do.” He stood, lifting a long arm over his head to stretch his trapezius. “But I’m not hearing anything about what you want to do.”

“I…” She squinted through the arena lights to stare at him. “I…”

“I also don’t know where in your plan it says you can’t date. That sounds ridiculous.” He shook out his arms, and she watched intently, cataloguing the motion while her mind whirled. What did she want? She wanted to be valedictorian. She wanted to get her PhD. She also wanted to wake up next to a confrontational basketball player who threw himself into everything he did with a fire that only tempered with her. “You’re smart and something tells me you fight like hell to get what you want. Why can’t you have both?”

“You know what, Logan?”

“What? You gonna tell me I’m right?”

“No, I’m gonna tell you that the pain in your left hand is from an undiagnosed sprain in your pronator quadratus and you need a wrist brace.”

“What the-?” She didn’t answer, only stood and stormed away, leaving him staring at his wrist in shock.

But when she flounced into her seat on the sidelines, she couldn’t stop turning his words over and over in her head.

~~~~~

“Let’s go, Langston,” Ellie shouted, cheering perfectly in time with her teammates, “let’s go!” She waved her pompoms in the air with a practiced grin, completing their timeout routine perfectly even though her mind was miles away.

She tried to focus on the game to distract herself from Logan’s words, but it was impossible. Besides, the game wasn’t much to focus on anyway: it was a catastrophe. She glanced at the scoreboard again, wincing as it showed Langston was winning by 11, and then immediately berated herself. She was a Langston cheerleader, for crying out loud; she wanted Langston to win. Didn’t she?

Her eyes cut to Colt, and she felt her gaze soften. He was having the worst game she had ever seen. He had scored two points all half, missing at least seven easy layups, and turning over the ball so many times even Ingrid wondered aloud who he wanted to win. And then, the worse he played, the angrier he got, earning a technical foul for a chippy elbow and getting into a furious argument with his Coach on the sidelines.

He did not look like a future pro.

He looked like someone who was having the shittiest day of his life.

Ellie swallowed as the clock counted down to halftime. It wasn’t like she was having an exceptional day either.

When both teams stood to head to their respective locker rooms, she tried to catch his eye as she walked to half court for her cheer performance. He pointedly avoided looking her way, head down dejectedly.

Her heart cracked open in her chest. What did she want?

This routine would be broadcast nationally. Her dad was watching, eyes peeled for a shot of her on live tv; Riya and Darius were probably doing the same at university. This was the biggest show she would likely ever perform in.

And she barely registered a flip.

As soon as her sneakers hit the sideline, she took off, pleading with the coach for a break, and then booked it, flying down hallways and flashing her cheer pass to security until she found the locker room. The door was closed but there was yelling, bitter screaming, the Coach shrill and loud, trying to rein in the shouts. She could just make out Logan and Colt, hollering over each other, the slam of a locker, a massive thump, and the door flew open, Logan and Colt grappling as they pushed through into the silent hall.

“Maybe if you got your head in the game-“

“Maybe if you got your head out of your ass-“

Logan saw her first, shoulders dropping in relief. “Oh thank God, you’re here. You deal with him.”

“What are you-” Colt spun and his jaw dropped as he saw her. Her heart fell; the fury on his face, paired with the bruise angry against his jawline, was intimidating, foreboding. “The fuck do you want?”

“I wanted to talk to you.”

“I think you’ve done enough talking.” He turned to follow Logan back into the locker room and she couldn’t, she had to-

“Wait,” she pleaded, wringing her hands in front of her. “Please, just wait.”

He stopped, turning back around to study her with guarded eyes. “What?”

“I…” She had to glance away, unable to bear the coldness in his stare. “I’m sorry.”

“Great-”

“No. Let me…” Tears were pricking at her eyes and she blinked furiously, willing them back. “I got into my head that this meant nothing, that we meant nothing, and-”

“We mean nothing, ok, so-”

“Let me talk!” She finally looked at him, trying to keep the tears from her eyes, tremor from her pleading. “Please,” she lowered her voice. “Let me talk.”

“... Fine.”

“I thought... You have a freaking ESPN bio and there’s talk of you going pro and I... I figured that this was a fling. That... that you just wanted to hook up. And, at first, I was ok with it; I’m focused on school and I guess I didn’t want to even entertain the hope that it was something more. But then your friend convinced me I should consider what I wanted, not what I assumed.”

“What? Who? What friend?”

“... Logan?”

“What?” Colt’s jaw dropped in disgust. “We aren’t friends! Logan is a goddamn idiot who-”

“I think you’re missing the point.”

He stopped mid spiel to cross his arms over his chest. “What’s the point?”

“That I never stopped to think about what I wanted. I was only following my plan, and doing what I was supposed to do, and I never really thought about what I wanted… or who I wanted. Colt, I don’t want to follow my old plan. I don’t want to go back to my life the way it was before.”

“Well, what do you want?”

“You.”

“Ha.” He scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Doesn’t seem like it.”

“I do.” She took a deep breath. “Colt. You’re tough. You don’t take my shit. You have high expectations of others, but you expect perfection from yourself. You’re smart and you don’t let anyone stand in your way.” She held her breath.

“... You sound like a fucking fortune cookie.” He ducked his head, but she could barely see the hint of an abashed smile. She exhaled as her lips spread into her own grin. “I thought you were too busy for me.”

“I ran down here after the biggest show of my cheer season. I can make time for you.” She stepped closer. “Logan convinced me that maybe I can have what I want, too. Maybe I can have both...”

“I’m not going to fucking thank him.”

“I would definitely not expect you to.”

He smirked, rocking back on his heels. “So how’s this gonna work?”

“I have a phone.” Her lips twitched, breaking further into a smile that she couldn’t quash. “We’re only two hours apart.”

“I dunno.” She felt her heart drop until she caught the way his eyes shone in the hallway light. “You dumped me, remember?”

“What-”

“You’re gonna have to make it up to me.” He shrugged.

“Oh, for crying out, l-”

“I’m thinking post-game massages, nude, of course.” He contemplated the ceiling, considering. “Some really good incentives for solid play and, when we win, definitely some-”

She didn’t let him finish his inane list, jumping across the hall to throw her hands around his neck and kiss him, desperately, their lips meeting eagerly as she sighed relief and joy into the curve of his smile. His hands traced the waistband of her skirt until they reached the small of her back, pulling her forward so they were even closer, bodies colliding, his fingertips catching under her blue-and-white uniform while her fingers twined into red-and-gold. Just when her lungs ached for breath, he pulled back.

“I knew you liked me.”

She swatted his chest and groaned. “Oh my god, does your narcissism know no bounds?”

“Am I wrong?”

She gazed up at him. “Not wrong.”

She was about to kiss him again when the door to the locker room burst open again, slam echoing down the dull concrete walls as Logan ducked his head out. “Yo, Kaneko, we need you in here. Coach is drawing up some insane new play where he is relying on Toby to shoot threes out of a pick-and-roll.”

“Oh Lord. I gotta-”

“Wait,” she interjected, pulling Colt closer by his jersey. “You wanted to impress me, right?”

“As if the week when you were holed up in my room didn’t-”

“Shut up. You want to impress me?”

His eyes softened, fingers tracing the strip of bare skin above her skirt. “Always.”

“Win,” she said. “Win Nationals. Win.”

He ducked his head to kiss her again, greedily stealing breath from her lungs before he pulled away, turning towards the door. “Done.” And with that, he was gone.

~~~~~

It was a different game, a different universe, when the whistle blew again.

Whereas Langston owned the first half, draining shot after shot, the tide had turned. Colt had seemingly stolen the magic from them-he was everywhere, stealing a pass off the fingertips of one player, blocking a three-pointer from another.

She watched, incredulous, as they started coming back, slowly, Langston growing weary and tired as the game continued, Colt only playing harder as the third quarter melted into the fourth and his team battled back, carving away at the Langston lead until they were only down by one point with less than a minute to play.

Ingrid shook next to her, nerves and excitement vibrating the pom-poms in her hands, but Ellie could only think in terms of numbers. They needed two more points, one more basket to take the lead, and then they could run out the clock and win. She bit her lip as Logan in-bounded the ball to Colt and he breezed down the court, rubber of his soles squeaking against the court as he passed half court.

She bounced on her toes. This is it.

She watched, transfixed, as the ball moved like lightning around the court-Colt flipped it to Logan, a foot outside the paint, but a sea of blue jerseys met him head-on. He bounced it back to Colt and her breath caught as he leapt, ball cradled in outstretched arms for a jump shot, feet leaving the parquet and eyes trained on the rim.

He hung, suspended in midair, as the arena collectively gasped; right as the ball was about to leave his fingertips, a blue jersey slammed into him, arms flailing, chest flying, both players slamming to the floor as whistles screamed and the crowd started shouting.

Oh my God.

Colt went down like a rock, so hard he bounced, landing on his side twice. Ellie winced, but he was up like a shot: she just caught the fury in his eyes before he spun at his opponent, hands balling into fists.

No. She glanced at the clock. They were still down by one with 5 seconds on the clock and if Colt got a technical foul now? No no no no.

He stepped closer to the Langston player, shoulders tensing. She saw his fingers tighten, bicep tense, fist cock back in slow motion; she leapt to her feet. “Stop!” she screeched, praying he made out her voice over the yelling, the hungry crowd screaming for a fight. “Colt, STOP!”

Miraculously, he froze, arm hanging in the air, hand clenched; she let out the breath she was holding as he dropped his fist and spun to look across the court, eyes finding hers. She shook her head frantically, pointing at the scoreboard, and it was almost like he heard her silent prayer. He took a breath, then another, eyes locked with her the entire time, and then her legs buckled and she slid to the ground. It was enough. His teammates had arrived, rushing over to interrupt the fight, a sea of red jerseys swarming him, pulling him away from the Langston blues and the brewing brawl.

“What… Ellie, what are you doing? Wrong team!” Ingrid hissed.

Ellie exhaled, his eyes still locked on him, her gaze following him as he was pulled to the free throw line. She didn’t even respond, only watched, pom-poms hiding her crossed fingers, as he stood at the line, dribbling slowly. The entire arena was frozen, waiting, holding their breath. Closing her eyes, she gave a silent plea to any deity that was listening.

She heard motion, Ingrid’s gasp, the swish of the net, a raucous cheer from the stands. He made the shot. One point. She opened her eyes with a smile. “Come on, Colt!” she shouted, flinching when Ingrid elbowed her.

“Wait a minute! Was that… You two? Seriously?!?” Ingrid gaped.

“Come on, Ingrid. Shut up.”

Colt looked over to their sideline, ball securely in his hands, waiting for his second shot. She stared back, mouthing ‘Good luck!’ He only raised his eyebrows, waiting for something; she groaned, shoulders falling when she realized what he wanted. He waited.

She raised a pom-pom halfheartedly.

He shook his head.

She groaned again, catching the smile on his face before she raised her hand higher and yelled, “Go Colt!”

Finally appeased, he winked, then pursed his lips in a quick kiss her way before turning back to the hoop, 15 feet from him.

Ellie desperately wanted to shut her eyes but she couldn’t, wouldn’t look away. He bounced the ball, twice, echo thundering in the silent arena, eerie with only the flash of hundreds of cameras, aiming right at him. Every single seat filled but silent, every single person waiting, desperately.

Ellie couldn’t breathe.

He bounced the ball again, one last thundering knock, and he raised his hands, exactly how he taught her. Knees bent, aiming at the front of the rim, pushing the ball off his fingertips, following through with his right hand. The ball soared in a graceful, gentle arc, before falling through the netting.

She leapt to her feet, screaming. Ingrid pulled at her legs, trying to get her to sit, but she didn’t care; she couldn’t stop the high-pitched noise, the howl, the deafening screech being pulled from her lungs.

Langston in-bounded the ball, but there wasn’t much time, passing it up up-court. They didn’t even make it halfway, timer ticking down, only one second to go, and their center heaved the ball but it didn’t even matter because it bounced harmlessly into the crowd and she was sprinting onto the court as fast as her cheer shoes would carry her.

Fans were streaming down the bleachers, screaming and bouncing, camera crews grappling for the best shot, but it didn’t matter as she jumped into Colt’s arms, giddy laughter mushed into his cheek as he spun her around.

“You won!! Ohmygod, you actually won!”

He carefully lowered her so she touched the floor.

“I know.”

“Holy crap!”

“Well…” He smirked. “Did I impress you?”

“Oh, for crying out loud.” She wanted to punch the smirk off his face but contented herself in reaching up to brush a stray piece of confetti off his eyebrow.

“What? Do I get that kiss now?”

“Oh my God! Just shut up and kiss me.”

And, with the roaring of the crowd in her ears, the confetti falling into her hair, the pulse of flashing cameras lighting up her face, he did.

Tags

Perma @desireepow-1986 @leelee10898 @emichelle @client-327 @choicesgremlin @brightpinkpeppercorn @thequeenofcronuts @lilyofchoices @choicesarehard

ROD @omgjasminesimone @mskaneko @lovemychoices @burnsoslow

Colt

@deimosensblog @alegria1580 @thefarrari @moonlit-girl-wonder @going-down-downtown@soniadotalves@jolietmaraud @flowerpowell@poeticscolt @zaira-oh-zaira @akrenich @sibella-plays-choices @maxwellsquidsuit @liamzigmichael4ever @octobereighth @i-only-signed-up-for-fanfiction

#playchoices fanfic #colt kaneko #colt x mc #ride or die: a bad boy romance #amy writes #because someone who i love asked so nicely #also i have been working on these forever and my brain is swimming

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s-mething-mbti · 3 years

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Hiya! I just discovered your blog and was wondering if you could help try to type me (sorry this is pretty long)

1. I’m currently pretty torn between the intuitive introverts. I was able to narrow it down to INTJ, INFJ or INTP. I’m about 97.2% sure I use Ni. The only thing that’s giving me a bit of doubt is I find myself occasionally learning for the sake of learning which I’ve found is a traditionally Ne trait. Despite this I’m still pretty sure I use Ni as when I go down a rabbit hole and start learning for the sake of learning its always about a topic that interests me or is entertaining. I won’t waste my time learning about something I find mundane or drab. I resonate a lot with Ni’s “aha” moments where the correct answer simply pops into my head or a vision suddenly seems clear or a plot holes solution suddenly seems painstakingly obvious. I also resonate with starting out with a broader range of information/ possibilities and narrowing it down to one or two things. Another intuitive thing I highly relate to is living in the future. If almost never living in the present, and a constantly fixate on the future. I have a distinct, clear, and well thought out plan for the next 20 years (give or take).

Where I run into a bit of trouble is when I try to figure out which judging functions I predominantly use. It honestly feels like I use them all (though I know you’re only supposed to be able to use two well). For example I plan out everything, and set deadlines for myself. My desk often seems really messy to others especially when I’m doing art. This isn’t because I don’t value cleanliness, but because it simply makes more sense to keep all my art supplies out rather than having to spend at least fifteen minutes taking them out and then putting them away only to take them right back out the next day. I set goals based off of easily measurable, external things such as time, or grades. I make daily to do lists that outline everything I’ll need to do in the day, and some stuff to focus on if I have extra time. With my to do list I also plan out the approximate time each thing should take. When coming up with a scientific theory, I take others opinions/theories and test them against each other, and current scientific laws in order to formulate the most probable theory. External opinions (in a scientific/ logical manner) mean a lot to me (I don’t really care about how people that aren’t my friends think of me). To me these things seem very Te. But then I’m always smiling and am a fairly warm person. I want my friends to be happy, and I want to help others. I despise emotionally driven conflict(though I love debates), and while I’m not afraid to disrupt it if it threatens my morals/ is promoting something blatantly wrong (factually or morally) I do really harmony. These seem like pretty Fe things to me. As for Fi, I rarely share my negative emotions, preferring to deal with them predominantly alone. While I may not talk about them much I also have EXTREMELY strong morals. If something is crossing them I’m not going to simply ignore it for the sake of harmony. While I tend to be private I do try to be as authentic as possible. My morals are derived by information I’ve collected and decisions I’ve made myself, rather than being derived by ‘the groups’ collective morals if that makes sense. To me these things appear to be very Fi. As for Ti, sometimes I enjoy learning simply for the sake of learning. The knowledge may have no practical use to me but if I find it interesting or want to learn about it I can devote hours to it. I try and come to the most logical/accurate conclusion possible, and when I’m offering advice I may offer additional advice that takes different variables into account. The truth is really important to me as well.

2. Reading. I absolutely ADORE reading(specifically fantasy/sci-fi/dystopian books or research/scientific articles about topics that interest me). For reference there was a period of time when I had some free time and I was reading 2 or 3 books a day? Read maybe 50 books in the span of 20 days? But yeah I absolutely love reading. Just he way the book sucks you in and deposits you and a completely new world full of wonder and disaster and ugh it’s just magnificent. And don’t even get me started on impeccable character development and eeee. The way rereading a book feels like you’re reconnecting with an old best friend or going back to your childhood home and *sobs*. I also LOVE trying to predict plot twists and character deaths. Most of the time I can predict things correctly and idk it’s really fun to just try and figure out what’s going to happen before the big reveal. And the rush of satisfaction you get when you’ve guessed something right- it also helps me brace for character deaths (sorta. For example I knew *the* death in the final empire [by Brandon Sanderson] was coming since nearly the very beginning [I had my suspicions since the moment vin was introduced] but I still sobbed when the character died. [a tad off topic but what caused me to cry wasn’t the death itself but another characters reaction to it. This is often the case I find. A death of a character I love leaves me feeling empty but what typically gets me to cry is the others reactions- for thus reason funerals usually make me cry. I should also add that I only cry when I’m alone. I’ve cried around people (that aren’t my parents) a grand total of 1 time.]

Uh and daydreaming. I’m almost always daydreaming. Ie. if my brain was a search engine or whatever one tab would be reality and I would consecutively have at lest 20 other tabs open. Some of then playing videos (daydreams) others supplying music(if I’m not actively listening to real music my brain cycles through songs I have memorized. Occasionally does this with book scenes too if I’m bored [yes, I memorize some of my favourite scenes, word for word, so I can play them like a movie in my head when I, bored) others containing random info (just me thinking random stuff) etc.

3. I guess how to solve some problems? Wether it’s a math or science problem, or an argument between friends, figuring out how to solve things has always been something I’m decently good at. Math and science just. Make sense. And then with issues between people I’m good at looking at different perspectives (even ones that I don’t agree with) and playing out different scenarios/ possible outcomes of different approaches. This lets me come up with a solution that will successfully solve the problem with the least amount of negative ramifications involved

4. Hmm maybe being present? I honestly feel like life is passing me by and I’m just immobilized on the sidelines. Im so far into the future that I kinda forget to actually *live* every once in a while.

5. Honesty? Truth? Morals? These topics are all really interesting as they can be kinda subjective. The line between honesty and cruelty is so small. What is truth? Cause while yes, we have some set truths (such as the earth is orbiting the sun) so many ‘truths’ are simply subjective and completely depend on ones perspective. And morals my goodness. The stormlight archive is a really fun series that plays around with things like what is justice? And honour? I won’t get into it now but it brings up so many really interesting questions regarding morals.

6. Perspective . I think perspective is such a fascinating thing. Just. Different opinions. Seeing the world through completely different lenses. Interpreting the same thing in utterly different ways. When toying around with an idea I find it really fun to try and imagine opposing perspectives. While I can find different perspectives really interesting, they can also well... get on my nerves to say the least. Sometimes someone perspective is just? So blatantly wrong? And has absolutely no factual evidence backing it up? And part of me wants to just just scream and it would be so much easier if everyone just. Assessed the facts in front of them instead of making wild accusations or whatever without anything to support them. But yeah overall I think perspectives are really cool and they’re part of what helps to make the world diverse and life so much less interesting without different perspectives.

The future. I’ve found a bunch of my friends find thinking about the future stressful but if I’m being honest I find solace in thinking about the future. Having things planned out and knowing what I intend to do/ where I want to go takes off so much stress. I lowkey live in the future and I honestly cannot wait till it comes, and I achieve my goals. While I might be a bit scared the future excites me so much more than it’ll ever scare me.

7. Maybe add some more stuff about the judging functions and feelings and thinking etc . I absolutely adore science and math. I literally do math for fun. I’m currently aiming to get my PhD in astrophysics.

Not sure if this is relevant at all but my biggest (harmless) pet peeves are my grandmother’s door stopper (it always gets stuck in the door and then u can’t get it out and the door won’t close properly- I have an unhealthy amount of hatred for that thing AHAHJSEJKSMDJDJDJJ) and when people say some variant of “you did good”. Like nO NO YOU DID NOT DO gOoD. YOU DID W E L L (Anyways theres my little mini rant).

I’m my friend groups therapist (sorta). While I’m really not good with words and recycle the same three responses I always let everyone know that I’m here for them and they can talk to me without judgement etc. While I really don’t know what to say or do I try my best because I care about my friends and want to help them. I love them and so I want them to be able to be happy. Im always smiling (though this is more so because people don’t ask me how I’m doing when I look happy than because I’m genuinely happy. Most of the time I’m he farthest thing from that). I’m a pretty warm person who’s always happy to help, however I’m very introverted. I haven’t had a single conversation with the majority of people in my class (I’ve had a convo with maybe 5. Talk to 2 regularly. There are 26 people in my class). I never express negative emotions (with the exception of stress- I panic intensely in the 5 minutes immediately before taking a test as this helps me to completely turn off my nerves while I’m writing the exam. I may also make a joke or two about my negative emotions with close friends). I should also add that when making decisions I value logic more and think thinks through thoroughly, examining the pros and cons etc. While I take feelings and emotions into consideration when making decisions they’re more like an additional variable to consider rather than the main driving force that determines my decision. If I’m feeling really emotional and I need to make a decision I will postpone deciding until I feel more levelheaded. I’m really not impulsive in the slightest.

Thank you so much!!

INTJ

Living in the future rather than the present and your comfort in that sapce, your ability for and enjoyment of making predictions, your ability to really understand and try on different perspectives you don’t necessarily agree with, your focus on “ramifications” (aka future implications) while problem solving - this all points to high Ni.

You also show a Te preference - goals based on external metrics, to-do lists for daily tasks, logic based on the outer world (external opinion). When you said “While I take feelings and emotions into consideration when making decisions they’re more like an additional variable to consider rather than the main driving force that determines my decision” - that is a clear cut definition of Te over Fe preference.

Your tertiary Fi shows through here as well - willing to disrupt harmony if it upsets your morals, your morals being personally derived, needing to understand your emotions while alone. And lastly, your statement about “forgetting to live” from being in the future is pretty textbook inferior Se.

#ask #type me #intj #mbti #myers-briggs #Anonymous

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dillydedalus · 3 years

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january reading

why does january always feel like it’s 3 months long. anyway here’s what i read in january, feat. poison experts with ocd, ants in your brain, old bolsheviks getting purged, and mountweazels.

city of lies, sam hawke (poison wars #1) this is a perfectly nice fantasy novel about jovan, who serves as essentially a secret guard against poisoning for his city state’s heir and is forced to step up when his uncle (also a secret poison guard) and the ruler are both killed by an unknown poison AND also the city is suddenly under a very creepy siege (are these events related? who knows!) this is all very fine & entertaining & there are some fun ideas, but also... the main character has ocd and SAME HAT SAME HAT. also like the idea of having a very important, secret and potentially fatal job that requires you to painstakingly test everything the ruler/heir is consuming WHILE HAVING OCD is like... such a deliciously sadistic concept. amazing. 3/5

my heart hemmed in, marie ndiaye (translated from french by jordan stump) a strange horror-ish tale in which two married teachers, bastions of upper-middle-class respectability and taste, suddenly find themselves utterly despised by everyone around them, escalating until the husband is seriously injured. through several very unexpected twists, it becomes clear that the couple’s own contempt for anyone not fitting into their world and especially nadia’s hostility and shame about her (implied to be northern african) ancestry is the reason for their pariah status. disturbing, surprising, FUCKED UP IF TRUE (looking back, i no longer really know what i mean by that). 4/5

xenogenesis trilogy (dawn/adulthood rites/imago), octavia e. butler octavia butler is incapable of writing anything uninteresting and while i don’t always completely vibe with her stuff, it’s always fascinating & thought-provoking. this series combines some of her favourite topics (genetic manipulation, alien/human reproduction, what is humanity) into a tale of an alien species, the oankali, saving some human survivors from the apocalypse and beginning a gene-trading project with them, integrating them into their reproductive system and creating mixed/’construct’ generations with traits from both species. and like, to me, this was uncomfortably into the biology = destiny thing & didn’t really question the oankali assertion that humans were genetically doomed to hierarchical behaviour & aggression (& also weirdly straight for a book about an alien species with 3 genders that engages in 5-partner-reproduction with humans), so that angle fell flat for me for the most part, altho i suppose i do agree that embracing change, even change that comes at a cost, is better than clinging to an unsustainable (& potentially destructive) purity. where i think the series is most interesting is in its exploration of consent and in how far consent is possible in extremely one-sided power dynamics (curiously, while the oankali condemn and seem to lack the human drive for hierarchy, they find it very easy to abuse their position of power & violate boundaries & never question the morality of this. in this, the first book, focusing on a human survivor first encountering the oankali and learning of their project, is the most interesting, as lilith as a human most explicitly struggles with her position - would her consent be meaningful? can she even consent when there is a kind of biochemical dependence between humans and their alien mates? the other two books, told from the perspectives of lilith’s constructed/mixed children, continue discussing themes of consent, autonomy and power dynamics, but i found them less interesting the further they moved from human perspectives. on the whole: 2.5/5

love & other thought experiments, sophie ward man, we love a pierre menard reference. anyway. this is a novel in stories, each based (loosely) on a thought experiment, about (loosely) a lesbian couple and their son arthur, illness and grief, parenthood, love, consciousness and perception, alternative universes, and having an ant in your brain. it is thoroughly delightful & clever, but goes for warmth and humanity (or ant-ity) over intellectual games (surprising given that it is all about thought experiments - but while they are a nice structuring device i don’t think they add all that much). i haven’t entirely worked out my feelings about the ending and it’s hard to discuss anyway given the twists and turns this takes, but it's a whole lot of fun. 4/5

a general theory of oblivion, josé eduardo agualusa (tr. from portuguese by daniel hahn) interesting little novel(la) set in angola during and after the struggle for independence, in which a portuguese woman, ludo, with extreme agoraphobia walls herself into her apartment to avoid the violence and chaos (but also just... bc she has agoraphobia) with a involving a bunch of much more active characters and how they are connected to her to various degrees. i didn’t like the sideplot quite as much as ludo’s isolation in her walled-in flat with her dog, catching pigeons on the balcony and writing on the walls. 3/5

cassandra at the wedding, dorothy baker phd student cassandra returns home attend (sabotage) her twin sister judith’s wedding to a young doctor whose name she refuses to remember, believing that her sister secretly wants out. cass is a mess, and as a shift to judith’s perspective reveals, definitely wrong about what judith wants and maybe a little delusional, but also a ridiculously compelling narrator, the brilliant but troubled contrast to judith’s safer conventionality. on the whole, cassandra’s narrative voice is the strongest feature of a book i otherwise found a bit slow & a bit heavy on the quirky family. fav line is when cass, post-character-development, plans to “take a quick look at [her] dumb thesis and see if it might lead to something less smooth and more revolting, or at least satisfying more than the requirements of the University”. 3/5

the office of historical corrections, danielle evans a very solid collection of realist short stories (+ the titular novella), mainly dealing with racism, (black) womanhood, relationships between women, and anticolonial/antiracist historiography. while i thought all the stories were well-done and none stood out as weak or an unnecessary inclusion, there also weren’t any that really stood out to me. 3/5

sonnenfinsternis, arthur koestler (english title: darkness at noon) (audio) you know what’s cool about this book? when i added it to my goodreads tbr in 2012, i would have had to read it in translation as the german original was lost during koestler’s escape from the nazis, but since then, the original has been rediscovered and republished. yet another proof that leaving books on your tbr for ages is a good thing actually. anyway. this is a story about the stalinist purges, told thru old bolshevik rubashov, who, after serving the Party loyally for years & doing his fair share of selling people out for the Party, is arrested for ~oppositional activities. in jail and during his interrogations, rubashov reflects on the course the Party has taken and his own part (and guilt) in that, and the way totalitarianism has eaten up and poisoned even the most commendable ideals the Party once held (and still holds?), the course of history and at what point the end no longer justifies the means. it’s brilliant, rubashov is brilliant and despicable, i’m very happy it was rediscovered. 5/5

heads of the colored people, nafissa thompson-spires another really solid short story collection, also focused on the experiences of black people in america (particularly the black upper-middle class), black womanhood and black relationships, altho with a somewhat more satirical tone than danielle evans’s collection. standouts for me were the story in letters between the mothers of the only black girls at a private school, a story about a family of fruitarians, and a story about a girl who fetishises her disabled boyfriend(s). 3.5/5

pedro páramo, juan rulfo (gernan transl. by dagmar ploetz) mexican classic about a rich and abusive landowner (the titular pedro paramo) and the ghost town he leaves behind - quite literally, as, when his son tries to find his father, the town is full of people, quite ready to talk shit about pedro, but they are all dead. it’s an interesting setting with occasionally vivid writing, but the skips in time and character were kind of confusing and i lost my place a lot. i’d be interested in reading rulfo’s other major work, el llano en llamas. 2.5/5

verse für zeitgenossen, mascha kaléko short collection of the poems kaléko, a jewish german poet, wrote while in exile in the united states in the 30-40s, as well as some poems written after the end of ww2. kaléko’s voice is witty, but at turns also melancholy or satirical. as expected i preferred the pieces that directly addressed the experience of exile (”sozusagen ein mailied” is one of my favourite exillyrik pieces). 3/5

the harpy, megan hunter yeah this was boooooooring. the cover is really cool & the premise sounded intriguing (women gets cheated on, makes deal with husband that she is allowed to hurt him three times in revenge, women is also obsessed with harpies: female revenge & female monsters is my jam) but it’s literally so dull & trying so hard to be deep. 1.5/5

the liar’s dictionary, eley williams this is such a delightful book, from the design (those marbled endpapers? yes) to the preface (all about what a dictionary is/could be), to the chapter headings (A-Z words, mostly relating to lies, dishonesty, etc in some way or another, containing at least one fictitious entry), to the dual plots (intern at new edition of a dictionary in contemporary england checking the incomplete old dictionary for mountweazels vs 1899 london with the guy putting the mountweazels in), to williams’s clear joy about words and playing with them. there were so many lines that made me think about how to translate them, which is always a fun exercise. 3.5/5

catherine the great & the small, olja knežević (tr. from montenegrin by ellen elias-bursać, paula gordon) coming-of-age-ish novel about katarina from montenegro, who grows up in titograd/podgorica and belgrad in the 70s/80s, eventually moving to london as an adult. to be honest while there are some interesting aspects in how this portrays yugoslavia and conflicts between the different parts of yugoslavia, i mostly found this a pretty sloggy slog of misery without much to emotionally connect to, which is sad bc i was p excited for it :(. 2/5

the decameron project: 29 new stories from the pandemic, anthology a collection of short stories written during covid lockdown (and mostly about covid/lockdown in some way). they got a bunch of cool authors, including margaret atwood, edwidge danticat, rachel kushner ... it’s an interesting project and the stories are mostly pretty good, but there wasn’t one that really stood out to me as amazing. i also kinda wish more of the stories had diverged more from covid/lockdown thematically bc it got a lil repetitive tbh. 2/5

#the books i read #long post #sonnenfinsternis is so good the audiobook nearly made me cry in the supermarket

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kainetestament · 3 years

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Falcon and Winter Soldier Episode 1 and 2 breakdown.

My oh My, Marvel is really giving us some sort of like a reality check in here. They added twists here that our current society are facing to hopefully “probably” teach us about our humanity as an individual.

In Episode 1, the series started out with Sam being on a mission in Tunisian Airspace to save Captain Vassant, who is now help hostage by LAF, there’s no reference to LAF in the comic, but here in MCU – it is describe as a criminal organization who is taking advantage of the commotion of the reverse blip in order to make profit. And here, Batroc makes his appearance once again after his first appearance in Captain America and Winter Soldier. Just a quick fact, Georges Batroc is portrayed by Georges St-Pierre, who not only shares his first name, but St-Pierre is a MMA Champion with a record of 28 matches of 26 wins and 2 losses, *woooot*, no wonder his moves are so fluid.

Moving on, Sam is now in Washington giving his speech as he surrenders Captain America’s shield, in which he believed will be put in the museum in honor and respect for Steve Rogers, but little did her know, there was a conspiracy behind it (which we’ll discuss later). James Rhodes still tried to talk some sense out of him, but Sam’s always reply with “It feels like it belongs to someone else. That someone else is Steve.” But let’s try to pay attention to what Rhodey say’s to him back.

World’s a crazy place right now. People are… Well, nobody’s stable. Allies are now enemies. Alliances are all torn apart. The world’s broken. Everybody is just looking for somebody to fix it.

It makes me think that Rhodey is specifically referring to Wanda when he said nobody is stable, not the people of the world specifically, because when we speak to someone, we know that everyone else are experiencing hardship, but we will always use someone as an example for the conversation, but on this case, they avoided referencing Wanda directly. Also the series takes place “months after the blip”, we don’t have the exact timeline yet, but we do know it takes place after WandaVision (two months earliest) and before Spider-Man Far From Home. So Rhodey receiving a report of Wanda’s actions, and Vision’s revival and Westview rampage is not impossible. The “Allies are now enemies. Alliances are all torn apart.” reference can have double meaning, considering what they did in WandaVision where they made the audience feel there’s more to that statement. But this can be an easter egg to Dr. Strange where they use the same tagged line for the movie prep while the alliances could referring to Avengers itself (though it already is, but they still considered that HQ as their home till Thanos destroyed it), S.H.I.E.L.D (we know this is not the same SHIELD of Nick Fury as he is now in space as hinted in SM:FFH), S.W.O.R.D (with Hayward abusing his authorities), and possibly the Sokovia Accords because of what Wanda and Vision did in Westview. But as I said, because of what Marvel did in WandaVision, in the end , they could probably just dismiss it as some government related stuff.

We now have Barnes who is reliving in his nightmares of the killing. Plate Number 10872 FQ is a reference to Marvel Comics called Introducing the New Captain America and Bucky that was publish in October 1987, where John Walker is now the new Captain America as shown at the end of the episode. Other think I actually like about Bucky’s therapy session was when the doctor asked for his phone, he is using a flip phone, not just any flip phones, looks like a AT&T Cingular Flip 2 (I guess it pays off learning about phones because I used to work for them, ahahaha), and since its year 2023-24 in this timeline, it’s quite fun to see this small detail done so perfectly because AT&T no longer service 2G signals since January 2017 (if I remember it correctly), to give way into 5G services. Anyway, this attention to detail about Bucky using a 4G flip phone is pretty amazing. And how am I guessing this is an AT&T phone? Well, in Infinity War, the phone Steve gave Tony is also another AT&T Flip Phone which I think is a Z223 (a 3G flip phone – not to be confused with Z222 which is a 2G version and both phones look identical). It’s quite funny actually that AT&T, who is the parent company of WarnerMedia (WB who owns DC) is very present here.

Then now we see Sam going back to his family whom he hasn’t visited for quite some time. Here he sees the struggle of his sister, and tried to offer his help. We can probably assume as per his behavior that when they go to the bank, their loan request will be approve because of his affiliations of saving the world and for being the Falcon, but reality check slapped him hard, the guy didn’t even bother listening to their plans and straight out denied their loan application – which was made clear in Episode 2 as to what the problem could actually be.

We now also see Bucky answering the set-up date Yori made for him with the woman name Leah, who works as a waitress at the Japanese Bar/Restaurant called Izzy. As their conversation proceeded, Bucky ran away to find Yori under the pretense of owing him his lunch, when in reality, it was his guilt of killing his son who became witness of his assassination.

Episode 1 ends by introducing the new Captain America, holding the shield Sam surrendered in the museum.

Episode 2 started with John Walker visiting his Alma Mater, Custer’s Grove High School. His full introduction even played Captain America’s theme song only re-arrange to match modern era. During his interview for GMA, he mentions that “I’m not Tony Stark, I’m not Doctor Banner, okay? I don’t have the flashiest gadgets, I don’t have super strength. But what I do have is guts.” Mentioning these lines could probably a way of him to get the sympathy of the people, by saying I’m not Tony Stark is like an indication that he doesn’t have the money, brains (to invent), or Iron Man suit that can make him powerful. By saying he’s not Doctor Banner, who have seven PhD’s and can transform himself into the Hulk, and debatable as the strongest Avenger, he can make almost like an assurance to the people that as an ordinary human, he have the guts to fight to the best of his abilities.

Bucky who is watching the whole interview, have a smirk on his face for disbelief and disappointment that his best friend’s shield is now in the hands of a wanna be. It then cuts to Sam who is also in disbelief that everywhere he go, he is seeing the face an unfamiliar guy wielding the shield that Cap gave him. He got ambushed by Bucky to told him he shouldn’t have surrendered the shield to which Sam replied “No, of course I didn’t know that was gonna happen. You think it didn’t break my heart to see them march him out there and call him the new Captain America?” – which I believe is his wholehearted feeling as he was cheated and betrayed by the government. But let us also pay attention to what Sam said after Bucky told him “This isn’t what Steve want.”

Oh my God. So what do you want me to do? Call America and tell ‘em I change my mind?

It’s easy to assume that the government and him probably had a conversation about becoming the new Captain America, but more than likely he declined, that’s why in Episode 1, Rhodey told him “I see you’re gonna make me ask. Why didn’t you take up the mantle?” Well, it’s probably more complex than his “It feels like it belongs to someone else.” –but we’ll talk about it in a bit.

I find it really funny about Bucky jumping off the plane feeling nervous, yelling even. I think the purpose of the director and writers are doing this is basically to give Bucky the opportunity or making the audiences feel that, even though he was an emotionless, robotic-like assassin, he can change and by including the rules his therapist gave him, can help him gain his humanity back.

1. Can’t do anything illegal.

2. Nobody gets hurt.

3. Unspoken (probably to introduce himself not as the Winter Soldier but Bucky Barnes or just simply smile). Dr Raynor only says that “The whole point of making amends is to fulfill rule number three.”

Also I really just wanna guess who those under 10 contact numbers are. We are sure its Dr. Rayner and Sam, I’m guessing it also has Steve’s old number, I wanna guess T’Challa too, so that’s four of them. Hmmmm, can’t really think of anybody else.

By the way, the SMILING thing. Right now, Bucky’s smiling is so unnatural, but even so, if he keeps on doing it, one day, he can smile naturally. And now we can also see him showing another kind of emotion, NERVOUSNESS – when he was about to jump down the plan. I'm pretty sure if he is his former Winter Soldier, he won’t even feel the slightest nervousness jumping off the plane, let alone landing gracefully, in contrast to here where he landed, let’s admit it, quite shamefully, even Torres will surely agree with me here. Then there's also the AGGRAVATION towards the new Captain America because of the shield. And the most important part of his humanity that’s resurfacing is his GUILT or CONSCIENCE, where his nightmare and Yori’s presence speaks very loudly.

While Bucky is stealthily walking, Sam references him as a White Panther, which is basically him being Caucasian and came back from his like rehabilitation in Wakanda, he has become like opposite of T’Challa’s Black Panther. And now Bucky corrects him by saying his new moniker is now White Wolf, a name that T’Challa bestowed on him (if not referred only).

Now for the action part, we get to witness once more Bucky’s Super Soldier ability by seeing how he outruns the second truck and catch up with the first truck, and these are 14-wheeler trucks (they’re scary in real life ahaha). Anyway, the battle began after the suspected hostage turns out to the head of the group, threw Bucky onto the windshield of the second truck, then pulled up by the other two members on top of the truck and John Walker and Lamar Hoskins joining them after.

I’m pretty sure STACKIE fans out there went nuts with a bit of that fan-service they did, when Falcon dive under the first truck on the way to the second truck to save Bucky, but I think the wings got caught on the ground making Sam loose his balance that’s why they went rollin’ on the yellow flower field – which looks like either chrysanthemum or daisy, which is in flower language, Yellow Daisy means a good friend while Yellow Chrysanthemum can mean neglect of love or sorrow. It actually looks more like daisy, it’s just that the leaves kind of looks like chrysanthemum… I could be wrong, but if it is daisy, then putting a yellow daisy here will be could actually mean that a good friendship is about to start and the chrysanthemum could mean their sorrow stemming from Steve and living up to his expectations.

We now have Bucky and Sam being invited by John and Lamar to ride with them on their jeep stating that it’s about 20miles to the airport and they need a ride. After joining them on the jeep, we now can see finally having a proper conversation. But we can see that Sam actually have to asked them twice about what are they doing there, they have successfully avoided the first time by stating that they checked their location thru Red Wing and on the second time, Lemar responded with “Well, they provide the resources and we keep things stable.” Then John followed it with “Yeah, violent revolutionaries aren’t usually good for anyone’s cause.” –which from my understanding, still doesn’t answer Sam’s question, that why Sam sarcastically responded with “Usually said by the people with the resources.” Then now John offered the two to join them, in which Bucky frankly declined, the Lemar tried to rub salt on their wound by saying their asses were getting kicked till they show up, that starts to tick off Bucky, until he mentions he’s called Battlestar, which pissed Bucky off even further. I’m not really sure why he got pissed after hearing that, but I’m guessing (yes, guessing, meaning I'm not sure) that the reason he got pissed was because Lemar have a hero name, pretty much like Bucky being the Winter Soldier/White Wolf and Sam being the Falcon, and of course Steve being the true Captain America, Bucky probably felt insulted that not only America made a new Captain America, they even gave him a side kick with a hero name.

Bucky got off the jeep first then John apologizing to Sam by saying he’s not Steve and is not trying be like him, but trying to be a Captain America in his own way. Sam left the jeep as well after he felt insulted when John wanted Sam and Bucky, who are Steve’s best friend and partners, to be his wingmen. John clearly have no idea of what their relationship really is and calling them Steve’s wingmen rather than Steve’s friend or partner, but he used wingmen, that John interprets as they are just someone that supports Steve, he’s clearly belittling them, that’s why Sam scoffs and responded with “It’s always that last line.”

We now see the Flagsmashers arriving on a place of one their group’s supporters to get some rest. Their leader Karli received a text message saying “You took what’s mine. I’m going to find you and kill you.” –which I think is a message from John Walker. Because in the comics, John became like a super soldier from Powerbroker, and in here, we can probably theorized that the real reason he is in Munich is to get his hand on the serum but Karli stole it from him before he could get his hands on it.

We now have Sam and Bucky on military plane and Bucky telling Sam that they should take the shield back, in which Sam told they can’t do it just like that cause the last time they did (also in Germany), Sharon – Peggy’s niece who was also a CIA, helped Steve and Sam get their weapons back (shield and wings before the airport battle in Civil War), then they went on hiding until Thanos came, and Bucky was taken in by T’Challa to cure him at Wakanda. Sharon was punished for her actions, and she will be making her appearance any time soon since the ED also have her picture included but her name is not yet present since she hasn’t made any appearance yet.

Bucky brought Sam to Baltimore, MD to meet the Black Super Soldier, Isaiah Bradley. As they walk thru the neighborhood on the way to Isaiah’s house , looks like the show have already hinted what’s about to come in the future. The kid upon being introduced called Sam the Black Falcon, instead of just simply the Falcon. Sam played with the kid by asking him “Is it because I’m black and I'm the Falcon?” and the kid confusedly replied with “Well, technically, I mean, yes.” Then Sam playfully responded with “So are you, like, Black kid?” and they started laughing it off. But if you look at it from a different perspective, it is kind of like the premonition, because within their conversation, it can only be done by them, because if a white person actually say that phrase? I’m pretty sure, that laugh in the end will not be present. There’s more to it but I’ll discuss it after.

Sam and Bucky arrived at Isaiah’s house, and Bucky introduced him to Sam by saying “He was a hero. One of the ones that HYDRA feared the most, like Steve.” As their conversation proceeded, Isaiah explained that others like him that were sent in Goyang never came back, so the military sent him to deal with Bucky and he won that battle. But instead of being celebrated as a hero, the military or government decided to brand him and put him in jail for 30 years. I’m not gonna use his comic s counterpart since MCU have their own story retelling. But as I mentioned before, it’s a premonition.

Then Bucky and Sam left the house and Sam feeling a bit frustrated due to disbelief that other than Bucky and Steve, there’s another Super Soldier still alive for decades. Then here comes a bit of reality check in America. A patrolling police catches them having an argument. Soon after, the police asked for Sam’s ID but didn’t asked for Bucky’s but instead asked Bucky if this man is bothering him. Now this is actually quite a very, very good reality check and I applaud the Malcolm Spellman and Kari Skogland for putting this kind of a wakeup call here. These scene or event is very powerful and it mirrors the reality of the black community experiencing the racial profiling from the police brutality in America. We can also see the house behind Sam that says STOP THE VIOLENCE, then on board beside it reads words like, HEAL THE SICK, STOP KILLING, PLANT A SEED, LOVE, TRUST. It was not until Bucky dropped the hint by saying “Do you know who this is?” and one of the police recognizing them as the Avengers and the police stared at Sam for bit and realized its Sam Wilson aka the Falcon and started apologizing by saying he didn’t recognized him since he isn’t wearing his goggles. With the police instead of just letting it go, still tried to look for a loophole, but sadly the loophole is not with Sam, but with Bucky, who missed his therapy session because of going with Sam on Munich then to Baltimore.

We now see Bucky being released thru John Walker’s authority and Dr. Raynor summoning both of them for a therapy session. The scene started out quite funny but later on, it hit hard again. Dr. Raynor asked Bucky why Sam aggravates him.

Bucky: Why did you gave up that shield?

Sam: Why are you making such a big deal out of something that has nothing to do with you?

Bucky: Steve believed in you. He trusted you. He gave you that shield for a reason. That shield, that is… that is everything he stood for. That is his legacy. He gave you that shield, and you threw it away like it was nothing.

Sam: Shut up.

Bucky: … So maybe he was wrong about you. And if he was wrong about you, then he was wrong about me.

Sam: You finished?

Bucky: Yeah.

Sam: All right, good. Maybe this is something you or Steve will never understand. But can you accept that I did what I thought was right?

We can now also see that before Bucky leaves, it dropped yet another hint of what’s about to happen by asking his doctor, “What was rule number two again?” which is more likely will be broken and even Dr Raynor acknowledges that it will.

I’ll skip John Walker scene, and now we have Karli loadingthe plane with their Super Soldier serum supply. When a member of Flagsmashers stay behind to delay the Power Broker’s, one of Power Broker’s men who is seen wearing a bullet proof vest was seen talking over the phone saying “They got away.” whom I think he’s reporting to John Walker.

Now let jump back with Sam and Bucky. Sam asked Bucky what he’s thinking, Bucky responded with “When Isaiah said my people”… Sam understood that when he said “my people” – meaning white people that’s why Sam said “Oh, don’t take it to heart. That’s not what he meant.” To which Bucky corrected him saying “No, he meant HYDRA. HYDRA used to be my people.” And now they are off to see Zemo and now we see Zemo inside his cell.

Pheewwwwww, that’s a long post… ahahaha, see you on the next one, still working with Snyder Cut but im still considering of I should post it or not, after all, so many groups out there already made a video and article out it…but we’ll see…

#TheFalconAndTheWinterSoldier #TheFalcon #WinterSoldier #WhiteWolf #CaptainAmerica

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marcholasmoth · 4 years

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OSRR: 2201

sup y'all, i slept until 3 today. good news is my headache was gone by the time i woke up. bad news is i was exhausted for the better part of the day, just because of the heat.

more good news, i got to hang out with joel. he is, of course, my favorite, so jot that down. and even more good news, i applied for five scholarships and then did research on a few colleges i thought of for their physics department programs of study. i have more research to do, that's for certain, including tuition rates and transfer processes, time for each state to become a resident so i can get lower tuition, and stuff like that. but one of the most important things is that the school will accept me for a second bachelors degree, and so far i know two will let me do that. and then it'll be on to a masters/phd, so some continuity might be good, but it's still up in the air. i do need to come to some decisions soon, because i'm supposed to be graduating in may, so it's important for me to figure this out, even though i'm flat broke and likely won't be able to afford it.

so that's all in my determination of what i can and can't do that i need to figure out.

anyway, now joel has the headache, and i feel one coming on, so i'm gonna put my dreadful phone down and go the fuck to sleep y'all.

#molly rambles #operation srr #osrr #2000s #2200s #sunshine boy

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mymarvelbunch · 4 years

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Be Your Own Hero - Steve Rogers x Reader (Part 3)

Masterlist

Summary: Y/N has lost all her family and most friends in The Decimation (I refuse to call it The Blip). Refusing to believe their deaths are permanent, she dedicate years to find a way to reverse it. When she finally finds something that might help, she searches for the Avengers. It’s Steve Rogers x Reader, but there is also a lot of Badass!Reader. Also, Non-American!Reader. If you are American, think of a country you’d have loved to be born into :D

Warnings: none!

Note: Y/Co = your country. Y/Ci = your city; Y/N/L = your native language.

Previously: The van doors opened and a human being was tossed out. You heard groaning and approached them. The building was still dark, but, thanks to the machine lights, you could see their face clearly. It was Scott Lang. Ant-Man. Back from the dead.

Part Three

“So, you’re telling me it’s been three years since I got stuck”, Scott said after you finished your story. “Even though it felt like three hours for me.”

“To be fair, I had no idea of how much time had passed for you”, you said nonchalantly, as if you talked about these kinds of things everyday. Probably the shock hadn’t worn off. “Honestly, I just wanted to study your machine. Never in a million years I thought you’d still be alive.”

“Well, we have to get to the Avengers”, he said. “Are they still in New York?” You nodded. “Great. Let’s get on the road.”

In the end, they didn’t have to steal the van. You had to hide, of course, but the guard was so surprised to see Lang alive that he let them out without further questioning.

On the 3-day ride to New York City, you two introduced yourselves properly and discussed everything you both knew.

“My original plan was to steal the van, bring to the Avengers, ask them to figure out how to get inside the Quantum Realm and find the Stones in their quantic form”, you explained.

“Sounds extremely difficult, to be honest, Y/L/N”, he replied. “I think there is an easier way to achieve the same goal.”

“And that would be?”

“Like we established in the first couple minutes we met each other, time has passed differently for us. For me, it has only been three hours. Here, three years. If we find a way to enter the Quantum Realm at one point in time and leave it at another point in time...”

“We could travel to the past, get the Stones in their physical forms, come back to the present and make our own wish”, you finished for him.

He frowned. “I was thinking more along the lines of trying to stop Thanos before he makes his wish.”

You shook your head. You remembered reading about time travel when reading about the Time Stone. “That wouldn’t work. When we travel to the past or the future, we create alternate timelines. If we, say, kill Thanos in the past, nothing will change here, but we’ll create a dimension in which the Decimation never happened. Problem is, we have to do something that can change our present, not our clones’.”

It took a while, but he eventually nodded. “I’ll trust you. You're the one who came to me with an informal PhD on Infinity Stones and magical things, so.”

“I also rescued you”, you added with a grin. He smiled back and thanked you once again. “And we’ll bring Hope back. We’ll bring everyone back. We’re closer than anyone has ever been so far.”

“Yeah. God, I hope you’re right.”

So did you.

Three days later

Finding the Avengers headquarters was easy with Scott driving. You had switched seats every four hours during the trip, but you asked him to drive all the way when they reached NYC, since he had been there before and knew the his way around much better than you, who had never even been the country before.

Hopefully one day you’d come back with your family. The city looked so beautiful, even if somewhat empty.

“You should wait in the car first”, he said when he stopped in front of the building. “They don’t know you, but if I manage to get in, I’ll bring you along.”

You nodded and waited. His greeting was awkward, like he didn’t really know what he was doing, but it wasn’t like you’d have done better. Eventually he was allowed to get his van inside, and you along.

At the room, there were two people waiting: Natasha Romanov, the Black Widow, and Steve Rogers, Captain America.

Suddenly it was hard to breathe. Scott introduced you while you took deep breaths to compose yourself. This was important. Extremely important. You couldn’t afford to ruin everything by fangirling.

“Y/N?”, Scott called. “I think it’s better if you begin to tell your tale. I kind of showed up only at the end, so.”

Right. Your story. You took another deep breath.

“Would you like to sit down?”, Steve Rogers offered. You nodded, and he guided you and Scott to a couch.

“Okay”, you began as you sat down, followed by the other three. “I began searching for the Infinity Stones as soon as I heard of them for the first time.” Rogers blinked at this, but didn’t say anything. You continued, “I desperately wanted to believe the Decimation wasn’t permanent, that we could bring its victims back, so I started working on finding out who Thanos was, what the Infinity Stones were, and how they were all connected. Long story short, because you probably know most of my initial discoveries anyway, I ended up in a Sanctum of the Mystic Arts.”

“They had dozens of books about the Stones, book and manuscripts. The temple Master had foreseen my arrival and had faith that I’d succeed. It was wonderful to hear that, of course, but I asked her how she knew that. She said that all sorcerers draw their powers from the Time Stone, even if they never came in contact with it.

“I spent a year inside the temple, studying the texts 24/7. I found a lot of things, but the one that gave me the most hope was when I discovered that, if one gather all Stones and conceal their power, they can make any wish.”

At that, Rogers interrupted you. “It sounds great, Y/L/N, but I’m afraid we can’t gather the Stones back.”

Romanov nodded. “Thanos destroyed the Stones in 2018, shortly after the Decimation. We managed to track him down and kill him, but it was too late.”

Thanos was dead already? Great. You didn’t have to fear that he’d try to reverse your wish if you succeeded. Instead of letting her face drop, like the two expected, you grinned.

“Oh, but remember what I said. The Master I met said she had foreseen my arrival thanks to powers granted to her by the Time Stone. If the Stone no longer exists, how could she have done that?” At Rogers and Romanov’s stunned expressions, you kept going. “She had sensed an attempt at destroying the Time Stone, yes, and we both guessed the other Stones received the same treatment. However, there is one thing about the them you probably don’t know: they exist both in physical and quantum forms. If Thanos destroyed the physical forms, they still exist in the Quantum Realm. Proof of that is that the universe is still standing. No Stones, no universe.

“I remembered reading on Scott Lang, a.k.a. Ant-Man, on the internet. Many people wondered on his disappearance, since there is footage of his workmates turning to dust, but he is nowhere to be found, despite having been with them. Everyone knew Ant-Man’s abilities came from Quantum technology, so I assumed that, if I found the van he was last seen in, I could find a way to get inside the Quantum Realm.” You glanced at Scott. It was his turn.

He nodded. “Right. So, back in 2018, we - and by ‘we’, I mean Hank Pym, Janet Van Dyne, Hope Van Dyne and myself - we found a way to safely get inside the Quantum Realm, something that hasn’t been done before, like ever. Hope, she... she was supposed to pull me back, but she got dusted seconds before she could do it. It was Y/N who accidentally pulled me out, three days ago.”

“I’m sorry”, Romanov said. “Those must have been three long years.”

Scott shook his head. “That’s the thing. In the Quantum Realm, time goes differently. I didn’t get stuck there for three years, but for three hours.”

“We had a lot of time to discuss while driving here”, you continued, letting an yawn escape. “My original plan is not great, and impractical. I only kept going because it was my only hope. But I believe Scott’s idea is better.”

“It won’t be easy”, he said. “But it’s possible, at least, something we’re not sure Y/N’s original plan is. Well, our new plan consists in figuring out a way to create... a time heist. We enter the Quantum Realm in a point of time - the present - and get out in another.”

“The past”, you clarified. “I know it sounds crazy, but in theory, it’s possible. There were many studies on time travel when I read about the Time Stone. There have been attempts to do it before, only it was by magic instead of physics. We don’t have the magical item anymore, but we can figure out another way.”

A short silence. “And what would we do then? In the past?”, Rogers asked.

You took a breath. “When you travel back in time, you create... an alternate dimension. Our timeline wouldn’t be affected by changes in the past. Say, we kill Thanos in... 2014 or something. It won’t change a thing for us, but now there will be a timeline in which the Decimation never happened. What we can do is, get the Time Stone from the past, bring them here, make our own wish and bring everyone back. Thanos is not even alive anymore to try to undo our wish.”

Rogers shook his head. “Honestly, ma’am, with all due respect, this is insane. How are we even supposed to trust you? Only Scott knows you and, frankly, he might be biased due to the fact that you rescued him.”

You bit your lip. You had predicted this would happen. “There is a Sanctum here, in New York. The sorcerer there can confirm almost everything, if not everything, I said. I have the address.”

Romanov asked to speak alone with Rogers, and two left the room. Scott looked at you. “They probably think it’s a trap.”

“I’ll bring Wong here if I have to”, you replied instantly. “I spent three years finding a way to bring my family and friends back. I won’t give up now because the Avengers think I’m HYDRA, or whatever.”

There must be have been something in your expression that frightened Scott, because he quickly looked away. “I believe you”, he said in a low voice. “I have to.”

And you understood. You had to believe in yourself, too.

-----------------------------------

Finally, America’s Ass shows up! Sorry if you were expecting sparks right away, but it didn’t seem plausible. Steve has every reason to doubt the Reader, given he’s never seen her in his life. Don’t worry, soon he’ll be more comfortable around her, and vice-versa!

Next: Y/N, Steve, Natasha and Scott head to Tony Stark’s house to ask him for help. Will they have more luck than in canon? Also, Steve begins to see more of Y/N, and she starts to see who Steve is behind the shield.

Taglist (open!): @autobotgirl15-blog @starstrucknature @cheeseburgersstuff @aamzter2013 (couldn’t be tagged, sorry!)

#Steve Rogers #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers x you #captain america x reader #captain america x y/n #captain america #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #marvel imagine #avengers: endgame

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artoflifehealingarts · 4 years

Text

Posted on Quora

By Tony Castaldo

Q: My IQ is at around 151 (Mensa). What can I expect to achieve in life?

Welcome to the club! You can expect to achieve absolutely nothing!

This is like saying, “I have a race car engine. How fast can I go?”

Well, buddy, you need the rest of the car, and unfortunately nature will not always match your engine with all the rest of the mechanical parts in your car. All the parts are randomly chosen and then forced to fit together.

The “rest of the car” in this case is both your physical self, and your emotional self, all you have proven with an IQ test is that you are capable of fast analytical problem solving. That doesn’t automatically make you well-adjusted emotionally, it doesn’t automatically make you an athlete, it doesn’t mean anybody will love you or you will love them, it doesn’t mean you will make a ton of money.

Here is the key you will learn when you get older. It may take time, but I’m giving you the hint now, so you’ll recognize it more quickly than I did: Emotions are king, and will ultimately determine your fate. Not rationality, that is a servant to your emotions, and it will always be.

The neocortex is called that because it evolved recently; before that we were ruled by instincts and emotions and very limited reasoning power, like all other animals. Well, in this case evolution worked by adding something new, not subtracting. Before the neocortex, our instincts and emotions were completely in charge of our actions, and guess what? They STILL hold the throne!

There is an “accidental” brain experiment* with a man that lost his amygdalae in surgery (basically the structures that act as an emotional clearing house) to excise a brain tumor. As a result, he was rational, he could solve math problems, ace quizzes, he did not lose any of his intellect. But he was incapacitated anyway, because he could not make decisions. Asked to pick out clothes for a day, he dithered in the closet for hours, until he had to go to the bathroom. And narrating what he was doing, he could endlessly analyze and come up with reasons to pick one shirt over another, depending on who he might meet, where he might go, what the weather would be, and never come to a conclusion.

You might think he’d get bored or angry or frustrated and just grab a shirt: Nope. Those are emotions. He wasn’t embarrassed by taking so long; he didn’t hate himself, he didn’t worry about what it meant that he could not make a decision. All emotions. In essence, he just did not LIKE any shirt more than another, and he had no rational reason to pick one over another. So his intellect just came up with one thing after another to present to the king (the amygdalae), which was dead on the throne and never indicated to the intellect “I prefer that option.”

Now bladder pain, hunger, muscles and joints hurting and getting tired from standing too long; those are not emotions, and he knew how to respond to that. Physical discomfort is a thing; but also not intellect. Given orders, he knew how to respond to that.

So what is the evolutionary role of Intellect, then? It is a SERVANT to your physical and emotional self, and provides you information, projections and predictions, and understanding for you to emotionally react to.

Why stay in school, when, emotionally it would be much more satisfying to have some money by getting a job? Your intellect will project those two futures, in one you likely have a better job and better life, in the other your short-term indulgences will lead to lesser jobs and a more difficult life. And when you emotionally consider one of those options better than another, the intellect has done its job and you stay in school, despite the short term allure of not being a broke ass student.

You have to learn to manage your emotions, delay gratification, and your intellect can help you with that, but it also depends on your emotional constitution right now. The Intellect can let you breeze through school and college. Mine let me finish a Bachelor’s in Mathematics in 3 years flat, and my Master’s in same in 18 months. It let me go to college for 12 years, earning five degrees with a 4.0 GPA, including my PhD.

Academic success is yours, and getting it will help you become financially successful, because our society pays (literally and figuratively) way too much regard to advanced college degrees.

But your emotions can derail all that. Mensa itself has studied this**; their members are not all successful, even in their own judgment, not all of them are living happily ever after. They have had members get addicted to drugs, get defrauded, go to jail for committing impulsive crimes. They have had high IQ women that got pregnant and bore children at 15. Mensans end up as janitors, truck drivers, and Amazon warehouse workers. Mensans have struggled with depression, and committed suicide. Mensans have attempted stupid stunts and ended up paralyzed for life. Mensans become obese and diabetic and get diseases because they cannot control their eating, their depression, or resist impulsive temptations.

And guess what? All of that shit at about the same rate as the general population that is NOT high IQ.

Why? Because emotions rule our lives. The best thing you can do with your intellect is not to “gain control” of your emotions; you cannot dethrone the King and should not try. But what your intellect CAN do is manipulate the King, learn to convince yourself to choose the best balanced outcome of short, intermediate and long term gains.

Should you study Computer Science and within that Algorithmic Science, there is an interesting class of Algorithms called “Greedy Algorithms”. Greedy algorithm - Wikipedia . The hallmark of such algorithms is that always choosing the optimal short term solution is guaranteed to produce the optimal long term solution, so it is very easy.

That is how basic animals work, as if this is always true of the world. It is why we can trap them: We humans can devise traps so the optimal short term solution for the animal will NOT lead to their optimal long term solution, it will kill them instead. The rat taking the bite of cheese triggers a spring-loaded bar that breaks its neck. The deer chased by a human takes the route of fastest escape and lands in a concealed pit.

People have all that same Greedy Algorithm equipment built in. The purpose of the intellect is to let you defeat this very strong tendency to choose the optimal short term solution, because the Greedy Algorithm does NOT solve all problems. Animals, and us, evolved emotions to use the Greedy Algorithm because it is the simplest and easiest algorithm to implement, one step up from the random action of bacteria and viruses.

The intellect is there to help you accurately predict the consequences and outcomes of your actions in the future, so your emotions can make an informed choice about what will give you the most emotional gratification in the long term, or at least for as far as you can see the future.

There is often a tendency amongst the high IQ crowd to put undue importance on the value of their intellect. They want to “Spock it out,” dismiss emotions as unimportant.

Well, Spock is mythical bullshit, humans don’t work like that, so figure that out as soon as you can. The point of life is emotions, and the best thing you can do with your intellect is use it and delayed gratification diligently to ensure you live a happy life, find love, avoid fear and embarrassment and prison and disease and disability, work at a job you love that uses your talents.

There is no point in being smart if it doesn’t make you happy. You have been gifted with a superior ability to solve problems and understand consequences. A bigger hammer to solve life’s problems, or avert them altogether. But it is useless if you don’t use it, there is no point in being proud of just owning a big hammer, you need to use it.

And remember that your Intellect is a servant to your emotions, it isn’t there to replace them, but to inform them, so you can resist short term gratification when your intellect sees it is likely to sabotage your long term future. That is how you avoid being trapped like an animal and suffering at the hands of others.

* Amygdala results: I believe I first read about this in the book “The Man That Mistook His Wife For A Hat”, but for a neurologist’s talk see Antonio Damasio | Speaker | TED.

** See for example High intelligence: A risk factor for psychological and physiological overexcitabilities.

The remainder of the conclusions and advice are my own based upon reading several such studies, and the implications mentioned.

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hermannsthumb · 5 years

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75, but kinda like a secuel to your fic for 3?

halloween is over which means it’s officially that time of year where i watch a bunch of shitty hallmark movies as background noise and imagine newt and hermann in all the romantic scenarios instead........AND revisit all my leftover winter ficlet prompts from last year! the op of the original prompt list has since moved to pillowfort so i’ll link the list from there instead. this one is a sequel to one i wrote last year (one of my favorites of my own imo) w/ cool uncle hermann and hot single middleschool science teacher newt found here

75. our first date is spent walking around our small town holding hands and talking as soft snow falls around us

from winter writing prompts here

--------------------------------------------

It gets dark before long, and--following a quick text from Karla informing Hermann she’s finished her errands and is on her way to pick the three of them up--Hermann decides he ought to round up her kids. The string lights hung around the ice rink have flickered to life, and between them, the haze of the falling snow, and the fresh piles of it gathering atop the nearby pine trees, it makes for a strangely pretty picture.

The snow flecking Dr. Geiszler’s eyelashes makes for a pretty picture, too.

“I’ll get them,” he says, when Hermann stretches his stuff limbs with a groan and prepares to trek back across the snow. He stills Hermann with a hand to his arm. He’s still wearing the silly mittens. “No offense, dude, but they’ll definitely listen to me more than you.” He waggles his eyebrows and gestures to himself with his thumb. “Teacher.”

Hermann nods and sags back against the railing. He wasn’t fancying the idea of shaking life back into his frozen joints and shouting himself hoarse anyway. “Thank you, Dr. Geiszler.”’

“Newt,” Geiszler corrects with a wink. “You wanna hang back with me so we can get that coffee? My apartment’s only a few minutes away, I can give you a ride to your sister’s afterwards.”

“Oh,” Hermann says. “Yes, if you wouldn’t mind.” Truthfully, he hadn’t expected Geiszler to make good on his invitation. Hermann isn’t the sort who gets asked out on spur-of-the-moment dates, especially not by cute, scruffy strangers; it seemed too good to be true.

“Be a second,” Geiszler says, and then cups his hands around his mouth and bellows, “Hey, guys, over here in five minutes or you’re on lab clean-up duty for all of January!”

This gets their attention. Fast. After a minor setback involving a missing hat (found, as it were, in a snowbank on the other side of the railing), they’re ready to go with time to spare when Karla’s car pulls up at the curb. She rolls down the passenger window while her children (pushing aside shopping bags and flinging in wet coats) clamber into the backseat, and waves at Hermann. “Did you have fun?” she says.

“Oh, loads of it,” Hermann says, sarcastically. Karla grants him a small, amused smile. (You’d be hard-pressed to get much more out of a Gottlieb, really. Hermann often envies her children for how easily mirth comes to them.)

“Well, your torture is over at last,” Karla says. “Get in. I got Indian takeaway for dinner.”

Behind Hermann, Geiszler coughs, and Hermann flushes. He hadn’t forgotten Geiszler--not by any means--but he’s not quite sure how to explain I have a date to his sister in terms that don’t use the word date. Date carries an awful lot of baggage. “Ah, actually,” he says. His voice sounds falsely casual even to his own ears. “That won’t be--necessary. Dr. Geiszler has offered to take me home.”

“Hi,” Geiszler says.

Karla peers around Hermann and narrows her eyes. “You played the piano at the winter program,” she says.

“Sure did,” Geiszler says. “I organized the whole thing, too.”

“Dr. Geiszler is going on a date with Uncle Hermann,” Hermann’s niece informs her mother solemnly.

“It’s coffee,” Hermann says quickly. “Only coffee.”

“Coffee and a ride back on my motorcycle,” Geiszler confirms.

Motorcycle? Karla nods slowly. “Of course.” The window rolls back up, but not before--like he’s still her kid brother, and she’s caught him sneaking out the back door at midnight to meet up with a boyfriend all over again--she calls out “Don’t stay out too late, Hermann!”

Her car peels away.

Geiszler sticks out his hand. Hermann takes it.

The coffee shop Geiszler takes him to is two blocks away on main street, kitschy and tacky as anything from the outside, and has, predictably, closed early by the time they get there. The sign in the window blames it on the inclement weather. Geiszler scuffs his unlaced boot against the snowy sidewalk and groans. “Well, fuck,” he says. “Sorry. I guess there’s always Starbucks. This place rocks, though, I wanted you to see it.”

Hermann gives his hand a consolatory squeeze. “Oh, I don’t need coffee, anyway,” he says. “The cup you bought me at the rink was just fine.”

“The cup I bought you at the rink tasted like shit,” Geiszler says.

“It was fine,” Hermann says.

“Dinner, then,” Geiszler says, peering up the street at whatever still has its lights on. Most of the businesses, Hermann realizes (from the Indian place Karla ordered from, the antique shop, the used bookstore) have closed early tonight. There’s a single diner, equally kitschy-looking, still lit up with neon. “Do you like…” He hums. “...Hamburgers?”

“Not particularly.”

“Neither do I,” Geiszler admits. “What about--”

“How about we just take a walk, Dr. Geiszler?” Hermann cuts across. “I’m really not that hungry, and it’s...a nice night.” It is, really: fluffy snow, and old-fashioned lamp posts, and not a car in sight. Geiszler’s rainbow flappy hat and lumpy mittens.

“It’s Newt, dude. Newt,” Geiszler insists, but he links their arms together with a smile.

They make their way back down to the park that houses the skating rink--now also closed for the night--and start down a small, well-lit path. “So what’s the infamous Uncle Hermann doing in all the way over here?” Geiszler says. “The kids said you teach in England.” He nudges their shoulders together and grins. “You don’t exactly sound like a local, anyway.”

“Winter holiday,” Hermann says. “I’ve a month off of work, and nothing to do with myself, really, and I don’t see my sister all too often--well, she thought it’d be good for us if I came to stay. For me. What’s a scientist doing at a middleschool hosting winter programs?”

Geiszler laughs. “The arts are important, man!”

“But a middleschool--out of everything you could be doing--”

“I like it,” Geiszler says. “It’s--I don’t know. Fun. I like teaching kids. Like I’m shaping scientists of the future or whatever.” Hermann hums, skeptically, and Geiszler sticks his tongue out. “Okay, I know that was corny. Shut up.”

They loop the whole of the park, hand-in-hand, and talk about the most inconsequential things: the weather (the first snowfall Hermann’s witnessed this December), their research (Geiszler is astoundingly intelligent, with a comical amount of PhDs), Geiszler’s mittens (personally hand-knitted after all), how much longer Hermann is in town for (until mid-January), how Geiszler ended up at that middleschool in the first place (he moved to town to be near his father, and they were hiring for Earth Science and Music). Their footprints have entirely disappeared under fresh snow when they make it back to the ice rink. It’s far later than Hermann realized, too; the large clock hanging at the front booth reads a quarter past ten.

“I guess I should take you back to your sister’s,” Geiszler says. He points in the opposite direction of where they walked main street before. “I’m down that way. I--”

He doesn’t get to finish, because Hermann (feeling pleasant and bold) leans in and brushes a kiss against his cheek. It’s cold and scratchy with his stubble. “I would like to do this again,” Hermann says, while Geiszler blushes and gapes. His glasses have slid all the way down his nose. Hermann pushes them back up for him. “If you’re amenable.”

“Wow,” Geiszler says, giddily. “Sure. Okay. Hah!”

Then he steps directly onto a patch of ice and slips and falls on his face.

Luckily, he hits the snow, though he does lay there for some time and groan. It’s a bit dramatic. Hermann pokes the small of his back with his cane once he starts to get bored. “Are you alright, Newt?”

Geiszler groans again, though with a distinctly affirmative flair, and rolls over. “You called me Newt,” he says. He pushes his glasses back up again.

“I did,” Hermann says, with a very small smile. Then he shivers. The chilly air has gotten a lot more noticeable now that he’s standing still. “Now please get up and take me home before we both freeze to death.”

“Cool, okay.”

#newmann #maria's fanfiction tag #feel free to send some in lmaoooo we've got 2 months #benito-el-gato-con-gorrito

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fandomn00blr · 4 years

Text

Trivia Tuesday, eh? <3

Ok, so I had to look up what Trivia Tuesday was because @serial-chillr tagged me (you’re the best, btw!). And I guess it’s fine if I just gush about some made-up “facts” about my characters/fics, right?

Tagging ahead to @charlatron, @johaeryslavellan, @kemvee, @barbex, @iarollane, and @factorykat! TELL US SOME FUN FACTS IF YA GOT ‘EM!

I’m going to share a bit (a lot) of head canon/name trivia that is very dear to my heart about one of my Hawke half-twins, Leandera Fenara Hawke that will hopefully be explored more in detail in a distant chapter of a future part of my Lost and Found series on AO3 (like, she doesn’t even exist yet in the parts I’m currently polishing up now, but I tend to write things in a backwards time spiral, so...spoilers, I guess?)

Leandera was originally named Leandra, after her late maternal grandmother (cuz Hawke is unoriginal but also cuz she missed her mama more than ever when she became one herself...not a thing I can relate to at all, I swear! shut up...I’m not crying...YOU ARE!), and Fenara, which was Fenris’ contribution, meaning something like “wolf’s journey” (I don’t understand Elvhen grammar because nobody bothered to actually develop one when they first started slapping words together and that’s okay, Bioware. I get that you had other more important things to worry about...like making everyone friggin hot and stuff, but if you wanted to hire me, a PhD-level linguist, I would take pay in the form of plot spoilers just so I can get out of academia). Fenris makes a habit of studying languages, and has a knack for picking up new ones (canon AF), but until he and Hawke had the twins, he had sort of avoided studying Elvhen for...reasons. Their son, Leandera’s half-twin, is called Malcolm Asaara...asaara being Qunlat for ‘breath’ for even more reasons, but this is about his sister, sooo...

When Hawke and Fenris brought their little family to Skyhold, the kids weren’t even four yet (another fun fact: they get a pretty sweet send-off/fourth birthday party right before leaving Skyhold), but Malcolm had already taught himself how to read and write (under Fenris’ tutelage, natch) because he’s kind of an amazing prodigy. Leandra hated reading and writing lessons, and sitting still for pretty much anything, so she had barely even learned her letters. But the Skyhold library was a favorite place to hang out for both of them (I mean, Dorian’s there...there are big comfy chairs...it’s round!), and when Leandra realized that she could read about dragons and shit in books, she finally started taking an interest in reading and writing (again...none of this is based at all on any of my own personal experiences with children, early childhood education, or literacy, or anything...).

Then the Fade thing at Adamant happened. Hawke stayed behind to fight the Nightmare because she’s a fucking bad ass. She also found Anders there. They were both rescued by Fenris and a team of powerful mages and Justice and... But anyway, Leandra finally got to meet her other dad, Anders.

When she was learning to spell her name (and phonemic awareness and all that shit), Fenris encouraged her to sound it out and spell it how she saw fit. She asked how Anders spelled it, recognizing the sounds of his name embedded in her own (which may or may not have been on purpose), and Fenris never corrected her (BECAUSE HE IS IN LOVE WITH ANDERS, TOO...DID I MENTION THIS IS SOME REAL SAPPY FENHANDERS SHIT?! ANDERS CRIED, OBVIOUSLY, THE FIRST TIME HE SAW HER WRITE HER NAME). By the time Hawke noticed, Leandra had already become Leandera (”with two Es!”), and she was signing her name all over everything, and Hawke just had to embrace it as well.

Omg...this got so long and meandering and I am so very sorry! I guess it’s also TMI Tuesday.

#dragon age #Lost and Found DA2 endgame canon divergence #trivia tuesday #tag #leandEra fenara #fenhanders #Hawke twins (not Bethany and Carver)#half-twins #heteropaternal twins #f!hawke #fenris #anders #literacy #names #hawke family #LF Hawke

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dark-naruto · 5 years

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Hi!! ❤️❤️ I was wondering what your top Naruto fics are?? Doesn’t have to be sns (though that’s the best), I just really crave some fanfic 😭 thank you!!

i’m SO SORRY this took me so long to complete; i know i said it might take a while but i still never meant for it to take THIS long;;; i’ve been really busy lately and when i actually get some free time i just don’t have any mental energy left😫 ANYWAY, this is by no means an exhaustive list of my faves, but my memory’s p terrible, so this is the best i could do😭 I’M SURE there are many excellent fics that i just couldn’t recall on the spot, but I TRIED😣 listed in no particular order:

40m² by winterdesu: rating: mature; words: 11,544; post-war cohabitation; nar & sask emotionally support each other, cook together, and grow a balcony-full of houseplants. a smidgen of angst.

Scores, Settled by hanakage: rated: M; words: 8,908; bartender naruto, ad-exec sasuke. sasuke goes to the bar naruto works at during the world cup to research an ad campaign he’s working on. naruto shares his love of football w him and stuff… idk it’s rly cute i’m bad at summaries just read it lol

Advantage: Us by sirona: rating: Teen And Up Audiences, words: 30,947; tennis au; the boys meet when they’re kids at a tennis camp and then go on to compete against each other at Wimbledon when they’re older! idk if u can tell but i looove sports aus, even though i know NOTHING about any sport lol. there’s a short vignette that follows this fic, Home is where you are, rated Mature.

bleary by upottery: rating: Explicit; words: 2,813; this one’s basically a pwp, but w a looot of emotions and intimacy and j u s t 😌 it’s v soft n good and i love it. ninjaverse!

Spacey ramen and the idiotic two by taeggukswitch (rooxynroll): rating: Teen And Up Audiences; words: 10,950; idiots in spaaaaace! nar is a pilot and sasuke’s a programmer, they meet when they’re paired up for an exploration trip. as one of the author’s tags says, ‘they’re intelligent af but also share one brain cell’ and this is extremely correct. it’s just a v cute and enjoyable read!

prairie town by applecrumbledore: rating: Teen And Up Audiences; words: 8,698; sasuke’s a research scientist who moves to a small town; his car breaks down and he meets hunky local mechanic naruto. i’m sooo bad at summaries lmao, but this is super soft and sweet and i read it whenever i’m feeling down as i consider it to be a p reliable cure for depression!

Realization (In a Drunken Haze) by playitagain: rating: Mature; words: 25,509; major warnings for alcoholism/alcohol abuse, so if that’s something that really bothers you, you should maybe avoid this one! personally, i think this is the most realistic depiction of alcoholism & recovery i’ve ever read in a fanfic- so often, even when it’s pretty clear that one of the characters has a drinking problem, it’s never really addressed, or even if it is, there isn’t a realistic portrayal of the recovery process. like, the character will just fall in love and then miraculously get over their problem and then it’s happily ever after. and while having a caring, supportive partner can be an essential part of recovery, love isn’t a magical cure, yk? ANYWAY, nar’s an english professor working toward his phd, sasuke is a student (not in any of nar’s classes) working on his master’s degree. iirc, sasuke’s age was ever specified, but i don’t THINK it’s implied that there’s any more than a few (maybe 2 or 3?) years difference between them, so no ugly a/ge g//ap business going on here. nar’s in steadfast denial throughout most of the fic that he’s an alcoholic, but with sasuke’s support, he finally starts on the (sometimes bumpy) road to recovery.

What about you? by cambion: rating: Teen And Up Audiences; words: 14,974; nar’s two best friends both come out to him, forcing him to get introspective about the exact nature of his feelings for sasuke. this one’s ninjaverse, with sasuke AND team taka back in konoha, and idk it’s just v gooood…

here comes the sun (and his kid, and a whole lot of love) by moonwatcher: rating: Explicit; words: 34,808; modern, single parent au. this one does have past ss and nh, but they’re really almost never mentioned so even if that’s typically a disqualifier for you, you still might enjoy this one. sas n nar meet at a pta meeting at their kids’ school, where nar is also a teacher. there are a looot of cute sasuke & sarada moments in this, some cute nar & boruto moments as well (no himawari in this fic tho; both guys each have only one kid), and some gooood mutual pining. it’s just really sweet and cute and i liked it a lot!!

Tough Love by Rasengan22: rated T; words: 5,729; this one’s p angsty compared to most of the other recs on this list; sasuke’s suffering from PTSD and depression following a car accident, and he’s isolating himself and having difficulty leaving his house as a result. he’s successfully managed to push most of his friends away, however naruto proves to be incredibly persistent and won’t give up trying to help him. as someone who is struggling with a lot of the same issues that sasuke is, this one hit home really hard for me. i just WISH i had a naruto who refused to give up on me;;;;

Change by stammi_vicinora: rating: mature; words: 18,378; naruto convinces sasuke to take an unprecedented day off from work, and sasuke uses his free day learning to relax and unwind a bit w his bf. this one’s just really fluffy and sweet!!!

All things of dearest value hang on slender strings by sirona: rating: Mature; words: 15,713; hokage naruto and anbu captain sasuke. during a particularly hot summer in konoha, naruto plans a beach festival for all the villagers. this one’s really fun and cute, and it may already be on virtually every fic rec list ever made, but it’s one of my faves so i still have to include it!!

Love Is Blind by OfFansAndFlames: rating: Teen And Up Audiences; words: 992; after an accident causes him to lose his vision, sasuke plays it pretty safe for the first couple of years, until naruto convinces him to put his trust in him and take a risk: by going for a ride with him on the back of his motorcycle. this one’s short & sweet, and i just loooove the element of taking a leap of faith with someone you feel safe & comfortable with to do something that’s seemed impossible to you for so long. it reminds me that with the right support, you can do things that have seemed beyond your capabilities and find a new appreciation for life! ❤

the hard-knock life of a walmart cashier by geminiuchiha: rating: General Audiences; words: 26,650; nart & sask are college students and co-workers at walmart in this one, and it’s just!! rly funny and cute!!! i know i’ve described p much every fic so far as cute sdjslfjdssd but that’s my favorite kind of fic, so !!! mutual pining ftw!!

Mirai Kissaten by fourangers: rating: General Audiences; words: 3,586; despite the fact that he doesn’t really like coffee, sasuke ended up becoming a regular at a coffee shop near his work. it might have something to do with the cute owner that always serves him when he stops by every evening on his way home. this is a really cute coffee shop au, super fluffy and sweet!

and, last but not least! 3 of my faves by kinomiakai:

A Night of Poor Choices by KinomiAkai: rating: Explicit; words: 13,134; sasuke is convinced by his friends to go out to a bar with them to celebrate hitting an important financial milestone in a video game they’re developing. since the bar scene really wasn’t for him, he found himself wandering outside the club, where he meets a very cute dog leashed to a parking meter. a few minutes later, he meets the dog’s very cute owner… this one is just extremely cute!!! kurama’s an adorable stinker who’s far too smart for his own good n___n

Rebuilding by KinomiAkai: rating: Explicit; words: 25,705; this one is ninjaverse, post-war, and i mean, it’s p much essential reading imo!! reading it was extremely healing for me, so if u (somehow) haven’t read it yet, i really can’t recommend it enough!! so so sooo good!!!!!

Enter Naruto by KinomiAkai: rating: Explicit; words: 112,230; sasuke and naruto are both college students in this, with sas studying creative writing and nar studying psychology. sasuke takes his professor’s advice and goes to a cafe looking for inspiration, where he ends up meeting naruto! this is another all-time fave!! i save re-reads for when i’m really depressed, bc it always makes me feel better;; it’s just… r e a l l y sweet and good 😌💗

#anonymous #ask #sasunaru #narusasu #sns #fic #fic rec #long post #this turned out to be longer than i expected lol #but it still feels like it's just a fraction of my faves!!#i tried to rec some fics that aren't already on p much every rec list that's ever been made #so i left a lot of the classics off this list #i still love 'em but i assume that they're already pretty well-known!#some of these r p old and some are r rly cute fics that i just read recently #ohh and these r all sns btw; thats p much all i read!#mystuff

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