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#rlly excited about the blending on this one

princessbrunette · 2 months

Note

omg what do you think the boys’ hidden talents would be ??

i think rafe’s will be posh hobbies he learnt as a kid, like he’s amazing at the piano or knows one classical piece really well and/or he’s fluent in French ?? because of Guadalupe

jj’s maybe really good at making cocktails ?? idk

john bee’s could be origami ?🤔

pope’s probably really good at juggling (he’s the only one with a brain big enough to coordinate himself to juggle ykwim?? 😭)

anywaysss im excited to know what you think

-🐣

WHY ARE THESE ALL SO ACCURATE !!

rafe is kinda shitty at french but he can speak it enough to be able to say he speaks it to impress people yk? the piano skill never went away though. he’s the type to just be casually super good at something without trying too n it pisses u off. the two of you will be cruising round an event ward had dragged the two of you along to network and he’ll sit down at the piano in the middle of the room n just start playing and you’re like ??

i do definitely think jj is good at making cocktails. comes up with his own mixtures you’ve never heard of before. he’s the guy that approaches you eagerly at every party holding a red solo cup saying “nah, trust me okay. my special blend. tastes like juice, try it.” when it does infact taste like alcohol— but it’s still yummy n gets you fucked up. i also believe for some reason jj has a special skill for making bombs (think hazel from bottoms) he learnt how to do it as a kid n then kept implementing the skill in his life to the point where the pogues have to be like “dude. no bombs.” before each lil mission. he says fine but next thing you know somethings blowing up and everyone’s running 🙄

john b does seem to be really nifty with his hands i feel like he can do stuff like origami or even randomly crotchet 😭 origami he’ll always be doing, when he’s deep in thought about some treasure or smth he’s folding up a piece of paper so intricately and you’re just like ?? how are you doing that ?? probably learnt how to crotchet from a babysitter he’d had when he was a kid, maybe even lana grubbs— and now it’s just a skill he pushes to the side until it’s your bday n now he’s kicking u out the room to crotchet you a puppy stuffed animal :(

pope can def juggle. and whilst he juggles he explains to you the physics behind it which makes him all the more nerdy n cute. i also believe he can sing, probably super shy about it but when you’re sleepy he’ll lay you on his chest n sing to you and you’re like ?? hello you are rlly good ?? and he just waves u off !

#🐣 anon #bomb maker jj has my heart #rafe cameron prompt #jj maybank prompt #john b prompt #pope heyward prompt

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heesdreamer · 2 years

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enhypen as ♡ hogwarts students

♡ heeseung - slytherin

completely unbothered when he got slytherin

the hat contemplated between this and ravenclaw for almost 2 minutes

first years are scared of him at first but then he smiles and helps them grab their books from top shelves

gained house points from mcgonagall after she caught him helping a certain gryffindor cast spells to remove graffiti making fun of jungwons plants

extremely calm and quiet in the halls

loud and messy hanging out with his friends

stayed at the school with jay and jake for christmas since they live far away

♡ jay - gryffindor or slytherin

head boy potential

unlike hee he enjoys the first years being afraid of him

huge softy to the groups hufflepuffs though, always buying and sneaking them snacks from hogsmeade since they were too young to tag along

takes his studies seriously

helps sunoo focus on his studies that he definitely doesn’t take seriously

looks rlly good in red and he knows it

♡ jungwon - hufflepuff

literally the cutest hufflepuff ever

always has bandaids on his fingers from prickly plants

everytime you see him his hair is fluffy and messy, sometimes accompanied by loose leaves

he was really excited to get hufflepuff from the sorting hat and even had his fingers crossed hoping for it

good friends with all students from any house

lost house points multiple times for sneaking plants into his dorm

♡ jake - gryffindor

quidditch seeker!!! always wearing his uniform

a born gryffindor, no doubt about what house he was going to be in even if he’s shy

always running into class late with a big smile and lots of apologizes

has received three different chocolates with a love potion mixed in (sunghoon threw them all away)

his favorite time of year is winter at hogwarts

loves to sneak up into the ravenclaw tower and write letters back home, sometimes sketching his friends so his family can get an idea of what his found family looks like

♡ sunghoon - ravenclaw

humble ravenclaw on the outside but a know it all with his friends

the youngest are always teasing him, whining and asking him to do their homework

he says no but still does it regardless

willingly to do anything for his friends especially during the battle at hogwarts

was genuinely surprised to be placed in ravenclaw

spends a lot of time perched in the window of the library

ask the slytherins lots of questions abt their common room

he’s the one who finds the room of requirement and to no surprise it’s full of his friends favorite things and beds for them all to crawl into when they sneak out of their separate rooms

can be found flirting with the paintings

♡ sunoo - hufflepuff

could’ve been a gryffindor!

commonly mistaken as one for his lack of accepting peoples teasing and demands

hangs out with jungwon in the green house, ‘helping’ by singing and drawing on the floor

cheers the loudest at quidditch games for jake (tripping once onto snape… -10 points for hufflepuff)

puffs out his cheeks in a pout when he wants snacks from the older boys on the train

always tells jungwon a cat should be their animal instead

♡ niki - slytherin

the last one to join the group and at first they were hesitant

he was quiet and intimidating

then he started crying when he got into slytherin and they immediately adopted him

follows sunoo around and tugs on his yellow scarf, sometimes switching them with his or tying them together when they walk

hides little notes in jungwons plants

can be found hanging upside in a tree or talking to the fish in the black lake

sneaks out with the higher years to hogsmeade, blending in with his height (and by hiding behind sunghoon)

#enhypen #enhypen drabbles #enhypen fanfiction #heeseung #heeseung drabbles #jay enhypen #kim sunoo #sunoo enhypen #jungwon #jungwon enhypen #sunghoon #sunghoon enhypen #nishimura niki #niki enhypen #jake enhypen #harry potter #enhypen Harry Potter

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girlautism · 4 months

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hi valen its hana can i still get a bandori card + essay or has the offer expired

HANAAAA this is so exciting for no reason LOL OKAY. i believe a little bandori propaganda wont hurt anyone. everyone should play bandori it has lesbianism and found family amd GAMBLING BY GACHA

whats there not to love....anyway im giving u....TWO kin assignments. And the first one...one of the highest honors i can bestow onto you. One of my top 5 fav bandori characters which is lisa imai. she really loves gyaru and fashion in general and she also really loves amigurumis but she denies it bcs she feels like it doesnt fit her whole cool charismatic persona LOL. shes really niceys. from the wikia: Lisa is a friendly and lively girl who appears mature and calm. Despite her appearance, Lisa acts as the mediator in tense situations, and takes care of everyone well. It's because of her that Roselia (the band shes in) is able to continue to stick together despite the contrasting members personalities and disagreements at times. She often chides the others if she feels necessary, bringing balance to the group.

Lisa is very caring in nature, and is able to notice when a friend is troubled, usually being the first to try and help. She does her best to do what she can, sometimes to a fault, where she'll put her all into something regardless of her own feelings. Adding to her caring nature, she sometimes calls herself an "onee-san", but the other characters have also compared her to a mother at times.

Despite her skills and proficiency as a bassist Lisa believes she is the least skilled member of Roselia, and can get quite sentimental at times as well. She easily cries when her friends, or especially Yukina, reaffirm just how much she is needed in the band or in general. However as time goes on, she becomes more confident and is able to call herself a proud member of Roselia.

some of my fave cards of hers (theres a lot more cards i love of her her cards just tend to be so so pwetty....)

And the second one is nanami hiromachi:3 shes SO silly shes in a horror research club at her highschool but all they do is watch horror movies rlly...shes so silly that she thinks shes TOO silly and is shy abt it. THE tism is strong in this one....And shes PINK how fitting is that. anyway from the wikia: It is due to her parents' odd nature that Nanami yearns to be a normal girl, as she believes that being normal is the only way to make and keep friends. However, because she inherited their intellect, talent, and artistic skills, people have had high expectations of her. As a result, others were jealous of her and she had no friends at all, especially when she won an art contest in middle school. This isolation resulted in her deciding to hide her talented and genius nature. She joined Morfonica because of the popularity of the girls' band trend, believing that way she'll be able to finally become normal. Nanami is a somewhat peculiar girl who longs to be normal, and constantly wonders whether the things she does or says are normal. She worries about standing out and hides her true self in order to blend in. Due to the fact that she hasn't had many friends, Nanami has no idea how to stop people when they argue and such, was even willing to search the internet for a guide for that.

Though she hides it, she gets excellent grades, has great artistic skill, and is a bit of a prodigy. She tends to brush her achievements off with phrases like "it was just a coincidence" or "this is nothing special". Adding to her genius nature, she is able to do things just with a bit of research on the internet, such as arranging songs or making accessories for the band's outfits. While pursuing the "normalcy" she yearns for, Nanami has sometimes ended up doing things that are hard to achieve normally or aren't regarded as normal, such as getting an average grade on all of her tests.

And my favorite cards of her of course...

I actually have the pond one i saved up for SO LONG to get her....And she came home....AHEEM...my silly genius he/she....

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pieroulette · 10 months

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Hi yuu!! Hru today!!

I just have so many questions that i want you to answer some are maybe about ur yandere series, my queen, and the angel enhypen series ( so many questions T - T )

1 quetion is how did you come up with the idea of making the yandere route series like for heeseung and jungwon and the other members etc the plots for each member really fascinates me a lot!!)

2.for my queen series i realized that in the beginning it seemed so that jake was a very important charachter and i persume is the person who wanted the dukes daughters painting to stay in the castle is he the member with the biggest connection to the MC or is it someone else???

3. For the my angel series what fascinates me is gow powerful the mc is i so wanna know her backstory and how shes nuch more powerful than the enhypen members and also makes them tempted to be seduced by her.

These are probably all of the questions i have for now!! Please take your time in reading them i probably have more about your other works but i dont really know how to describe them really well! Ps i also notices u have a k 90s fic releasing soon so in really excited about that!! Anyways stay safe!!

- xoxo,♠️ fate anon!!

omg hiii ♠️ anonnie !! <3 and wow omg thank you for all of these it makes me rlly happy!! i would rlly love to answer of them but since most of the stories r pretty new, my answers will prob be short to avoid potential spoilers !!

1) for the yandere series and it's routes, the ideas pretty much came from what i prefer from yanderes cuz i read ALOTTT of yandere fics for many years alrd lol, but most of them never rlly satisfies my own imagination for yanderes but that's okay! also i added some of my personal traits/interests for the plot. but if we have to be a bit specific for a single route, specifically route 1: then the inspirations mainly came from my awful past, and second -> the anime mirai nikki for the ideas of texting + phone. route 2 is like an outlet for my artistic side, plus jungwon is my muse so it all blends perfectly.

2) i can't seem to guess why u said jake when i haven't mention him anywhere in the teasers or the first episode T_T do u mean jay tho? but to answer the next question, i have to say that the entire story for my queen is a little complex and vast, and there are multiples route for each event that i haven't decided which one to go through yet. but for now, i can probably say yes.

3) well, for MC's backstory.. the first episode might be able to suffice your curiosity enough because there will be a glimpse of her past before she became a succubus. but what i can say for now is that of course, it ends on a tragic note. but it's also the reason why she became so powerful in the end anyways.

Thank you very much for all these questions, anonnie! They're really a big motivation boost for me to keep going ngl <3 I wholeheartedly appreciate it that you are curious enough to ask these questions, thank you! Also to hear you being excited for Classic Lovesick makes me really happy that it made me grin lol, thank you!! ♥️

#♠️ fate anonz

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quinnpriv1 · 8 months

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[flrd, pregnancy, est relationship, bonus scene]

He comes hot from how hard Riddle clamps down for him and Riddle is disappointed—he wanted Floyd to come inside.

Floyd pauses, stops wiping his hands on a wet washcloth to stare at him. Abruptly, Riddle realizes he said that bit aloud. He grins. “Oh, don’t worry. I’m more than happy to oblige.”

“Even when I’m like this?”

“Especially when you’re like this,” Floyd assures him.

hi ash! just wanted to drop in and just say that i rlly do think you carry the Floyd/Riddle tag like everytime I go like damn that’s a yummy fic and I check the username it is literally always you (though I think it’s because I like the pregnancy tag and well AHAHA)

Just wondering if it is possible to submit a request for a semi continuation or not rlly/ but future Floyd/riddle with kids? And their daily lives as so? Like just imagining small riddle and Floyd look alikes make my knees weak.

(I LOVE PREGNANCY AND KIDFIC YESSSSSSS i’m so excited fbfbdhhs omg

horizon lines is not required reading but can maybe give more context as far as the AU is concerned. 🥰 enjoy!)

“Let’s start with one,” Riddle insists, flustered and shier than Floyd has seen him in a long, long time. He agrees easily, fingering his husband open sweet and slow. Weeks would pass before they would discover that their efforts had paid dividends.

The air in the car after the doctor tells them they’re pregnant is an eerie blend of anxious and excited. Riddle buzzes in his own skin, tingly and more than a little terrified. He’s grounded when Floyd squeezes his fingers, reminding him that he’s not alone.

Life doesn’t stop. They still have to go grocery shopping. Both of them still have to work—to a certain point. Floyd is onstage when Riddle feels the baby kick for the first time, clasping a hand over his mouth to keep his happy sobs from escaping. He’s tacky and wiped by the time Floyd makes it home, showering to remove the concert funk, and Floyd whines all night about missing it.

He’s around for the rest of the milestones, however, worshipful with him. Floyd has never been good at keeping his hands to himself, but he’s gotten especially terrible since Riddle started filling out.

Riddle had been anguished in his early twenties when his metabolism caught up to him, but it’s not so bad now. It helps that he has an excuse.

“The baby wanted an extra slice of tiramisu,” Riddle explains haughtily, rubbing at the sizable bump.

“Right,” Floyd replies, unimpressed and unconvinced. Easily, he serves Riddle larger portions, quirking his eyebrow at the flavor combinations that emerge as Riddle gets bigger and bigger, glowing and lovely and perfect.

“I love you,” Floyd moans, rutting against his thighs one evening. Riddle feels properly fat, seven months along and soft all over, mewling as Floyd drags his fingers down, down, down.

He sinks his teeth into Riddle’s shoulder, starting at his breasts. Having them is an oddity. Riddle gets flustered whenever he stares at the mirror, thankful that reproductive functionality made it through his rough childhood intact. Often, the baby responded to stimuli, excited by their rocking and Floyd’s touch, rolling around for him.

“Feels so good,” Floyd continues, fucking fingers into his pussy as he bucks, ripping a whine from Riddle’s throat.

He comes hot from how hard Riddle clamps down for him and Riddle is disappointed—he wanted Floyd to come inside.

Floyd pauses, stops wiping his hands on a wet washcloth to stare at him. Abruptly, Riddle realizes he said that bit aloud. He grins. “Oh, don’t worry. I’m more than happy to oblige.”

“Even when I’m like this?”

“Especially when you’re like this,” Floyd assures him.

He’s more careful than he’s ever been in their entire lives. Riddle appreciates him more than words can express, appreciates their synced libido. It feels so good to rolled onto his side like a seal, unable to stop stroking his own belly. It’s soothing and warm and heavy.

Belatedly, Riddle thinks to himself, I think I quite like this process.

The first time Floyd pinches milk out of him and suckles at him, Riddle almost dies. The day of truth arrives only after many more bedroom adventures and despite all of the joys, Riddle is ready to have his body back, if only for a little while.

The delivery goes smoothly. He doesn’t scream once, though he clutches Floyd tightly, hair matted to his forehead as he bites his bottom lip. Floyd looks worse than he feels, stressed and frazzled beyond belief, trying his best to take the doctor at her word. They’re fine, they’re both healthy, Floyd chants to himself.

Some time later, the baby arrives, swaddled and bright red. He latches on Riddle’s nipple and his tiny, tiny fingers rest on pale skin. Kolt is darling, their little gem.

Floyd cries and Riddle does too, but far more gently. He’s determined to do right by his son, to give him a better life than he had.

The first few weeks are tenuous. Shifting schedules and responsibilities is hard even if Riddle tried to do it all in advance. An infant is an unpredictable thing. He can’t rely on his watch or his calendar or anything.

Going with the flow comes to Floyd naturally. Riddle is envious of his preternatural ease with their child, envious of the way Kolt curls up for Floyd and babbles whenever Floyd smooths his hair down. “He can tell if you’re keyed up,” Floyd explains, yanking on Riddle’s wrist, dragging him down to sit beside him on the couch. “Here. Deep breaths.”

Riddle wrinkles his nose. There’s so much to do, there’s always so much to do, but nevertheless he obliges. In and out, in and out. Gingerly, Floyd passes the baby over. Kolt is sleepy and smells vaguely of powder, diaper freshly changed.

This moment is life-changing. World shattering. Riddle keeps inhaling and exhaling and Floyd tucks his hair behind his ear, deeply affectionate. See? his expression says. Smug bastard.

Every day, there’s something new to learn. Floyd complains about Riddle pumping his milk instead of letting him suck it out and Riddle snaps at him. “Do you know how much milk I produce on a daily basis? Don’t be absurd.”

“Don’t tease me.”

Riddle colors, flattered by the compliment despite himself. “I most assuredly was not.”

Weeks fade into months in no time at all. Riddle is stunned to see how quickly Kolt grows before his very eyes. “He’s gotten more of your genes, I see,” Riddle murmurs, marveling over their son.

Floyd laughs. “Give it time. I bet he’ll turn out more like you.”

Riddle rolls his eyes. If so, it would only be because Riddle is more stringent about expectations. All he wants at this point is not to be like his mother, to lean into Floyd’s laissez-faire style. Manners are non-negotiable and doing well in school—no need to be the valedictorian—are his only tenets.

Before either of them know it, Kolt is babbling syllables and starting to crawl. It’s humbling. It warms Riddle all the way through. He’s nine months old and perpetually impressive. He understands, suddenly, why his mother felt the need to lock him up tightly and protect him from everything. Some part of him wants to do the same, but Floyd keeps him sane, holds him steady.

In the midst of it all, Riddle’s weight fluctuates. Work is what it is. They settle into their new routine. Having sex and being able to kiss is something Riddle missed in the later months of his term, straddling Floyd and riding him with reckless abandon.

Floyd has nothing but good things to say about his saggy gut and his stretch marks. “More for me to grab,” he says, punctuating the statement by fondling Riddle’s ass.

“Cretin,” Riddle gripes without heat, gaze warm and fond. It’s nice to know that Floyd still likes him without all of the severity. With all of the extra tarts and cake and ice cream.

“Still having cravings?” Floyd teases one morning, pinching one of Riddle’s hips.

Riddle elbows him so hard he gets coffee up his nose in retaliation.

The comment has a domino effect, stirs something deep in his soul. Kolt’s first birthday is fast approaching and he feels good. He’s busy, but he likes being busy, balancing his clients and sharing equal child rearing duties. Floyd’s flexible schedule keeps him more available, means he handles the brunt of the day-to-day duties, but Riddle is all about fairness to his core. He helps where he can, takes on more of the household chores, heating up simple meals when he’s not nursing or leaking through every bra he owns, Kolt getting fussy when he’s hungry.

Let’s start with one. He’d said it himself, hadn’t he?

He had been lucky not to suffer from postpartum depression, but there’s something to be said for the loss of something inside of him, carrying a human being and seeing his work to fruition. Floyd and Kolt are playing in his periphery and it soothes his soul. Absently, he puts a palm on his middle.

Late at night some time later, when the party with their friends and Floyd’s family has wound down, Riddle pops the question, fingers curled on Floyd’s chest. It’s warm, fan circling overhead, and they’d been contented with their fingers, too lazy to have penetrative sex. “What do you think about having another?”

Floyd’s eyes drift open. He’s wide-awake all of the sudden, pulse lifting ever so slightly. “Really?”

“If you’re not ready, we can wait.”

“No, m’fine. You’re the one I’m worried about. Everything okay?”

It’s a fair question. Riddle considers his answer before he replies. “I am, yes.”

Life is not perfect. It never will be. He explains that he doesn’t want the children to be too far apart, or to lose pace. For the moment, he thinks two is enough—but who knows. He’ll only know once he gets there, once he sees how they get along. Once he rebalances his time tables.

“I love you,” Floyd says.

Riddle nuzzles into him. “I love you too, Floyd.”

They put off active attempts for a few more months, until Kolt is walking more than he crawls. His hair is ruddy, rustier than Riddle’s own and his eyes are mismatched. He’s still so, so small and young but learning every day. Riddle thinks Floyd may have been right, after all—he can see echoes of himself in Kolt, his stubborn little pout and his angry little, “No.” He is charming.

It bolsters Riddle, makes him all the more convinced that he’s on the right path.

Kolt is playing with his food when Riddle pardons himself to vomit. He’s only eighteen months old, but he can tell something is wrong. Floyd calms Kolt down while Riddle pulls himself together, woozy.

His second pregnancy is more intense than the first, complete with different mood swings and cravings. When the doctor tells him it’s a girl, Riddle feels like everything clicks. The hormones are different. The experience is different.

Kolt is starry eyed when Floyd and Riddle explain what’s going on. He presses his ear to Riddle’s abdomen when he starts showing i earnest and he’s filled with unintelligible questions, brain working a mile a minute. They grin and cry and laugh.

They’re a family. A growing family, and a happy one.

Riddle couldn’t have imagined having something this nice for himself as a youth. He spares a moment to think about his younger self, his hopes and dreams and his fraught situation. He tells him it gets better even though he knows he can’t hear.

It serves as a nice reminder if nothing else, his boys playing together in the living room as he rubs his belly, content, stalking back to his desk for work once he’s gotten his fill.

#retro fills #txt #twst #flrd

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psychoticwillgraham · 2 years

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ok fuck it here’s a basic intro post about the main character from my (extremely queer) space pirate sci fi novel

This fucker right here? Yeah his name’s Raymond, and he’s a gay autistic trans man (pre transition/pre everything even though this takes place WAY in the future in space civilization, but I’m about to elaborate on that), and is dating a literal alien. Oh here’s the problem with the alien thing though: aliens haven’t been proven to exist yet in his universe, but his crew are the one’s who discovered said alien and now they have to keep xe’s existence a secret. But enough about that, we’re talking about this guy right here.

His father was a famous outlaw (space pirate) captain and he would routinely sneak aboard his father’s ship as a kid to experience the life of an outlaw because he thought his dad’s job was ‘super fucking rad’, and most of the time his dad would humor him, but only take him on low danger missions. His mom was also an outlaw and on his dad’s ship, and a lot of the time he was on the ship with his parents, but when they went on dangerous missions, they entrusted their closest friends, a group of android anarchists (theres gonna be a little story im writing to explain this later bc god their story is great), to look after Raymond. Not gonna say what happens to his dad eventually (spoiler: it’s bad and that’s what spurs Raymond into his career path) but I will say that his mom doesn’t die, so yay.

Anyway, he’s pre everything even though the technology for transitioning at that point, if you choose to still be in your own human body (bc you can get an android one in this future or go fully digital in cyberspace), is super advanced and it’s easy to do, because the system has priced trans people out of it completely and there’s no options he could even begin to afford. Even with his family’s ‘pedigree’ or ‘infamy’, he can’t manage to get good enough gigs to pay for transition stuff in addition to his basic needs like housing and food. Because each planet is different and each city on each one is different and yadda yadda you get the picture, difference in cost of living and everything like that.

But yeah, more about him. He’s a quiet wallflower of a man, preferring to blend in mostly because he already stands out just because of his last name and the reputation associated with it. He’s not ashamed of his parents’ legacy at all, he’s actually quite proud of it. At least, that’s how he is in public. In private, like with friends and at parties, he immediately shifts into an extroverted state, as long as he’s around people he’s familiar with. He can also have quite the mouth on him and have zero filter which is why his crew always tries to prevent him from drinking too much. He’s also obsessed with learning about how Earth used to be before it died (in this story Earth has been long uninhabitable and that’s how the colonization happened), which eventually leads to his expedition there where he finds his eventual alien partner.

god that was a long post sorry y’all lol I’m just rlly excited about my oc’s lol

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shorkbrian · 3 years

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Anxious

Prelude - It took me three evenings to write this (EW that’s the longest I've ever taken) and it’s RLLY long (almost 10k) so be warned. The style is mean’t to be jumbled, grammatically incorrect, and awful, rushed, and incoherent. My day-to-day life process is like this but worse lol and I wanted to capture just the feeling of bad that exists. Have fun.

(Ps Kirishima is the subtlest of creeps here. Def a stalker, but good at lying, and reader is too gullible.)

Pairing - Yandere Kirishima X GN Reader

Warnings - anxiety, panic attack, non con, NSFW, idk the usual.

Music - https://open.spotify.com/track/1qFMIjTe9esCDiytqUY19t?si=RrkIvlXMReyT6CYKEh6xdw

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Oh god, is that Pro-Hero Red Riot?

Your hands tremble as you lift your drink to your lips, take a shaky sip.

It feels too hot in here, is it hot? You scream internally.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

Red Riot, your favorite Pro-Hero in the entire world, was currently standing in line at Starbucks, looking up at the menu with his big, dumb, handsome face. He was wearing his hero costume - meaning he was on-duty, abs out and mask on.

As usual, you had ordered your regular drink, immediately sat down (always the blue armchair by the window, the one with the little table next to it). Normally you ignored each little tinkling of the bell above the door, the sound signaling another person entering the coffee shop. You just wanted to nurse your drink and look at stupid memes on your phone, try to gas yourself up for the day ahead, convince yourself that you would be able to get through whatever life decides to throw at you.

A particularly violent shake of the bell had your head snapping up, the loud noise startling you.

And holy fuck.

Red Riot.

Your cheeks were burning as you lowered your eyes to your phone, knowing that the big man was moving up in line, then ordering, then probably moving to wait near the drink pickup.

Looking up was out of the question - you didn’t want to ogle the Hero and make him feel uncomfortable, or for him to catch sight of your stupid blushing.

You almost dropped your drink the next time you raised it to your lips, your hands were so sweaty.

And of course that little slip-up had your heart beating ever faster, embarrassed that you had almost made a mess all over yourself, self conscious that someone had seen, oh god, what if people were looking at you, thought you were dumb and couldn’t even drink correctly? Oh god.

You set your drink back onto the little table at your side. A quick glance upward (to check the clock, that’s where your eyes went) and you could see Red Riot out of the corner of your eye, smiling as he took a picture with a fan as they both waited for their respective drinks.

Wouldn’t that be cool, to get a picture with him? But oh, that would mean you’d have to stand up, stumble over awkwardly towards him. Could you leave your drink on the side table? Would your seat be taken before you got back?

The hero would probably be able to spot you from a mile away, see how weirdly you walk, how your body looked. The thought made you cringe; he was so muscled and fit and in-shape, he’d probably think you were fat, or maybe weak? He’d be disgusted, wouldn’t he.

If you managed to get close enough to ask him if he wouldn’t mind taking a picture with you, he’d have to hear your voice crack, see how you shook like a tiny chihuahua from nervousness, see how sweaty and flushed you were from the embarrassment of being alive, of being seen.

God, you hated yourself.

You could never approach the Pro-hero and ask for a picture. He’d see how revolting, how weird and nervous and pathetic you were.

Plus, you’d already talked to the barista to get your coffee, had walked to the coffeeshop all by yourself and committed yourself to the horrifying ordeal of being known and seen by society. You’d done enough today to make your anxiety skyrocket, your hands were already shaking so bad, it’s a miracle you hadn’t dropped your drink or your phone or done something stupid and embarrassing to call attention to yourself.

“Red Riot!” Your eyes flickered up at the barista shouting, saw Red Riot smile and compliment the barista as they handed over his drink, something large and brightly colored and sporting an ungodly amount of whipped cream on top.

Red Riot left the Starbucks, the bell above the door jingling just as violently as it had when he had entered - the man was enthusiastic about seemingly everything, even opening and closing a door.

That’s actually one of the reasons he was your favorite. Red Riot was so confident and self assured, beaming with positivity and kindness. It was clear to see that he loved his job, that he loved life. Of course, you had seen him have bad days - in a few of the interviews after big rescues or horrific fights, his smile seemed to waver a bit, his eyes getting misty as the casualties were mentioned.

But that just showed he was human. Sensitive.

You grabbed your drink again, grimaced as nausea washed over you in a gentle wave. You were such a nervous wreck. But Red Riot had left - the only people here now were the employees and the people waiting in line. You just prayed none of them would pay attention or take notice of you.

----

He was here again.

Holy fuck, he was here again!

This time you weren’t as nervous (a mild feeling of excitement could be felt), you could actually drink out of your Starbucks cup without shaking like a leaf.

The redheaded hero had gotten his drink already, once again something large and colorful and probably loaded with sugar. But instead of leaving immediately, he moved to sit down and holy fuck - holy fuck he was walking right past you.

You didn’t want to look up, didn’t want to draw attention to yourself by moving - humans will subconsciously look towards movement, you knew that. But he walked further, you saw him sit down by the corner window, settling into the seat comfortably. He was wearing his hero outfit again, abs rippling as he leaned back, and out of the corner of your eye you could see him fiddling with his mask before taking it off and chucking onto the table in front of him.

Ah, so he was probably on a break.

Averting your eyes back to your phone, you tried to ignore his presence. He was a human being, just like yourself, who deserved and probably appreciated his privacy. God knows, if you were in his shoes, you wouldn’t want fans to even think about you, much less look at you.

Minutes passed, maybe twenty? Thirty? But you had finished your drink. Now it was time to will yourself to your feet, to breathe, in, out. You were going to walk over to the trashcan, throw your drink cup away, and leave to walk back home.

Oh, but you were nervous.

You always felt nervous - this was a common occurrence, and each time you came here (you visited this Starbucks maybe twice a week) there was always this fight with your anxiety.

People would look at you as soon as you stood up. Did you walk weird? Your body had weird proportions, people would be mocking you inside their heads as you walked. Your outfit wasn’t trendy, it didn’t fit your body right, you looked odd and out-of-place - that’s probably what people thought as soon as their eyes landed on you.

You’d get judged for your drink cup - the size, because people would probably think it was too big for somebody with your body. Or maybe too small? Would people think you don’t take care of yourself?

Oh god, what if it slipped out of your hand as you were walking over? Even with it being empty, the noise of the cup hitting the floor would draw everyone’s eyes to you. They’d watch as you scramble to pick it up, and they’d probably think how clumsy and awkward and incompetent you were.

And what if the trashcan was full? Would you carry your empty cup home with you? That would look weird, someone carrying an empty cup down the street. I mean, who does that? Well, you’d seen other people do it, watched them carry their drink until they reached a trashcan, and then throw it away. But what if there weren’t any public trashcans nearby? You’d look so odd, fumbling along trying so hard to walk normally, to not draw attention to yourself, to blend in with everyone.

Should you turn around to see if there was another trashcan in the Starbucks? Oh, but that might look stupid. The employees had seen you so often, you’d look like a fool for not knowing if there was another trashcan.

Ugh, and your walk. You have to focus on straightening your shoulders, keeping your back straight, moving your arms - just a little, not too much. Taking even steps, not walking with a heavy foot or making any stomping or scuffing sounds.

There was so much to focus on, too much. And now you had been sitting here for five minutes, knuckles white as you gripped your empty drink cup. You looked like a moron.

You could do this.

Deep breath in, deep breath out.

Remind yourself that people didn’t care, didn’t pay attention to all of the lame little things that you did. You anxiety was misplaced, you worried about things too much, and everything was fine.

You were okay, you could do this.

And so you stood, walked to the trashcan by the door (oh thank god, it was empty), and threw your cup away.

You heard Red Riot saying bye to the employees, his cheery, upbeat voice as he laughed at something one of them said. Oh, had something been said about you? Were the employees and Red Riot laughing about what a disaster you were?

No, you were just being nervous, that was your anxiety talking. Red Riot wasn’t that kind of person, and the employees weren’t either. You knew this.

The door jingled as you opened it, and you heard footsteps behind you so you moved to the side after you had gone through, holding the door open for whoever was behind you.

“Thanks cutie!”

Red Riot was fixing his mask as he strolled past, and your head snapped up, flushing fiercely as you met his gaze. You smiled awkwardly, throwing up a feeble thumbs-up.

Oh god, why did you do that?

Red Riot smiled back at you, giving his own exuberant thumbs-up. Well, at least he was doing it too. That made your anxiety quiet down a bit, emboldened by your favorite Pro-Hero.

You watched his broad back as he walked away, muscles flexing with each step. He really was a beautiful man, both inside and out.

----

The next time you went to Starbucks, you reached the door right as someone else did (even though you saw them walking towards the door, even though you slowed down your pace so they would reach the door first and would go inside so you wouldn’t have to do that awkward dance of who-gets-the-door and who-goes-inside-first).

But they pierced through the awkwardness, yanked the door open for you and stepped to the side and motioned for you to go in first.

It was Red Riot.

He was wearing casual clothes today, ripped jeans and a dark hoodie, but you’d recognize that spike red hair anywhere, those gleaming shark teeth too.

You nodded your thanks quickly, hurrying through the door so he wouldn’t have to stand there for long. Immediately you headed for the bathroom, not wanting to have the Pro-Hero standing in line behind you. He was intimidating, but in the nicest way possible. You were just afraid there was something about you that he would think to be weird, or odd, or out-of-place.

Better to just avoid the situation altogether.

When you finished your business (you were a nervous pee-er), you ordered your drink, deciding to be bold this time and try something different from your usual choice. It was the little things, the small little bits of life that made you anxious - those were the things that you tried to overcome. I mean, life’s all about the small victories, right? And hopefully if you built up enough small victories, you could have a really big victory someday, like telling your favorite barista that you liked her hair, or picking a different seat to sit in, or trying to make a friend with another customers as you waited in line.

But for today, the small victory was stepping outside of your comfort zone just a little bit, getting something new that you weren’t used to.

You ordered, waited patiently for your drink to be made, and then turned to go settle down in your blue armchair by the window.

And Red Riot was sitting in your seat.

Fuck.

Your hands were suddenly sweaty, and you felt the familiar pang of an upset tummy. You were so tired of being nervous, of freaking out every single time there was a small change that you weren’t aware of, or if something happened that you couldn’t control.

There was an armchair opposite the one you always chose - also blue, but not as comfortable and certainly not with a good view out the window. It directly faced your usual spot, but in all your time coming here, no one had ever sat in it. A first you had just figured it was uncomfortable, but as you came here more and more, you figured that the nook was probably for couples rather than individual coffee drinkers.

The time you visited was a bit odd, eight PM, a few hours before closing. But it was the least crowded at this time, and the sun was barely setting, and it was the perfect time for you to be unbothered and by yourself.

But there was Red Riot, invading your (unofficial) space.

But it was okay, you could just sit somewhere else.

It felt weird, sliding onto one of the chairs at a small table. You were so used to your usual, safe routine that this threw you off. You were shaking so bad that you missed your mouth on your first try of sipping at the straw. What an idiot.

You had to try again, holding the straw this time, before you could actually taste the drink.

Selfishly, you wished Red Riot had chosen a different chair. But he was entitled to sit anywhere he liked, and it was obvious he enjoyed this particular Starbucks. Judging by the familiarity with the employees, he was becoming a regular like yourself. You only came once or twice a week, but he probably got his drink fix more often than you did.

Hopefully he didn’t think you were stalking him.

Oh god, what if he thought you were stalking him? How would you show that you weren’t stalking him? Come on a different day? At a different time? But you were here first, this was your routine, and that was your chair!

But man, you really didn’t want to make the Pro-Hero uncomfortable - he’d probably had a few crazy fans who had stalked him before.

Sighing, you sipped slowly at your drink, pulling out your phone to look at memes and text a few to your friends. You could still go about your routine, even if you were sitting in a different spot.

----

You ran into him at the grocery store.

It was in the produce aisle, where you were trying to decide between red apples or green, weighing the pros-and-cons of each decision in your head. You probably looked like an idiot, standing in front of the apples and doing nothing but staring at them, but you needed to ignore that right now.

“Yo, Starbucks buddy!”

The shout rang out across the produce section, and you flinched, suddenly drawn out of your apple-selection process.

It was late, almost ten PM, who and why was shouting in the grocery store??

You weren’t one to turn and stare, but you were curious, and surely whoever shouted like that wouldn’t mind a few questioning looks thrown their way.

And so you glanced over your shoulder, expecting to see a bunch of teenage boys greeting each other, or maybe a man saying hi to his friend.

Red Riot was excitedly waving at you.

Your brain blanked. Immediately, you turned your head, trying to see if there was someone else he was waving at. But there was no one around you - hell, there wasn’t even anyone else in the produce section except for you and the hero.

So he had to be waving at you.

Turning your whole body this time, you gave an awkward imitation of his wave, and let out a soft, croaky “Hey…” as the big man walked closer.

He had a big dumb smile on his big dumb face, and as he reached you, it grew even wider.

“Starbucks buddy! I didn’t mean to make you flinch, my bad. I know I can get a little loud sometimes, haha.” He stopped right in front of you, a grocery basket filled to the brim with meat and a few vegetables clutched on one of his large hands. God, he was so strong, you would be struggling to carry such a heavy basket, and here he was lugging it around like it had nothing but a loaf of bread in it. Red Riot could probably squish your skull to a pulp with just his hand, goddamn he was big.

You shrugged at his words, desperately willing your brain to work and to think of something smart and eloquent and good-to-say. “It’s uh, it’s-it’s fine. I’m just y’know, one of those nervous people, y’know?”

Wow.

Good job brain.

But the Pro-Hero smiled gently, putting his basket down on the ground.

“Yeah, I kinda figured.”

Wait, what?

“I’ve seen you a couple times at Starbucks, the one on Grant and 1st. You always seem… well, nervous whenever I see you. At first I just thought it was because I was there, cause y’know, people have different reactions to seeing heros out in public.”

Your eyes were big, you felt your face erupt in an embarrassed fire, and your hands were fucking sweaty. Why couldn’t you have been born like, a blade of grass? A tree? Some non-sentient object that didn’t have to worry about thoughts or talking or how other people perceived it?

Red Riot continued, “But I’ve seen you a couple of other times; once on the subway, a few times at that park on the north side of town, haha, you really get around, dont’cha?”

Ah yes, now would be a good time for something to happen, like a plane to crash into the building and kill both of you instantly. Or some emergency that required his immediate attention, one that was so big and urgent that he would forget about you instantly.

His red eyes were drawn to your leg, which you were subconsciously wiggling like a toddler. His eyes softened, and his voice lowered an octave. “You always seem a bit… anxious. And I know that feeling, believe it or not. I used to be really insecure and nervous when I was younger-“

Oh, great. Now he was just calling attention to the fact that you were acting like a fucking child, that you were a fully-grown adult that couldn’t handle being out in the world because it was too nerve-wracking. Were you really that easy to read?

“-but I had some awesome people to help me through it. My moms were always really supportive, and they took such great care of me. It was rough for a little bit, but I learned how to be confident and how to strut my stuff and it’s helped me to help others. It’s sorta why I became a hero, actually.”

You smiled again, nodding. That made sense - each and every hero had a reason for why they wanted to help the general public, and of course Red Riot’s reason would be pure and inspiring.

“But uh, anyways! I just saw you shopping and thought I’d say hi to my Starbucks buddy. I was hoping you’d come and sit by me the other day, when I sat in the place you usually sit? But I understand that it’s sorta intimidating to approach a hero, even one in civilian clothing.”

Shoot, so he’d wanted you to sit by him that day? And here you were thinking that he had unintentionally commandeered your seat and was just trying to be left alone. God, you were so stupid.

“Oh, I’m-I’m sorry!” You stuttered out, face hotter than the actual sun. “I didn’t realize! I figured you always have people trying to get an autograph or a picture and you probably just want privacy, and I thought that maybe you just wanted to sit there and hadn’t gotten a chance to because I always sit there, which honestly that’s such a selfish thing for me to do - I should probably try to vary the places I sit so I don’t like-“

“Ah, don’t worry about it! You’re fine, okay? Trust me.” Red Riot patted your shoulder (yup, he could definite squeeze your head like a grape), before leaning down to grab his basket off the floor.

“Oh, well uhm, t-thank you, Mr. Red Riot” You resisted the urge to bow.

“Oh!” The man exclaimed, looking slightly surprised, “Call me Kirishima, none of that “Red Riot” stuff, alright?”

Confusion overtook you. “Uh, that’s only for your friends, civilians should respect the heros and call them by their chosen names.” At least, that’s what you had always been told.

But Red Riot just grinned. “Well, what’s your name?”

With a slight shake in your voice, you told him.

“I know your name now, so I officially deem the two of us as friends!” With his free hand, he patted you on the shoulder again. You shivered, and Red Ri-Kirishima seemed to notice.

“You alright (Y/N)? Didn’t hit you too hard, did I?”

“No, no… I’m just… kinda weird about touch I guess.” That was an understatement. You were so incredibly sensitive, every light touch felt searing, hugs always were too much sensation, you shuddered even thinking about cuddling - you were just too sensitive to touch.

Red-Kirishima stepped back, holding his hand up apologetically. “Oops, my bad. I kinda noticed that about you too, I should’ve remembered.”

At your questioning glance, the man hurried to continue. “Well, y’know, I saw that couple bump into you on the subway, and you looked like you were gonna cry. And then, like, at Starbucks you make an effort to not touch the barista’s hands when they give you your change.”

Great, so that was another thing you were obvious and weird about. Just great. You felt embarrassed that Kirishima had noticed that about you so easily, but you guessed being observant was part of his job.

“Well, I’m gonna go check out now, unless you need help with your groceries?” The man motioned to your barely-filled basket, and you shook your head.

“No, it’s-it’s okay. I can handle this, but thank you.”

Kirishima gave you a thumbs up. “Alright, sounds good. Although, are you planning on walking home?”

You shook your head yes, prepared to receive the “its not safe” talk. You knew it wasn’t safe, but it was just a few blocks, and you had made the walk to your apartment a million times, plus, you couldn’t afford to pay for an uber or a cab.

“It’s pretty dark out there, mind if I walk you home? I’m a hero and all, I promise I’m not going to try and steal your wallet.”

And there it was. For someone as nervous as yourself, walking alone in the dark really was no issue. Maybe it’s cause you weren’t afraid of someone trying to hurt you. You looked poor, you were ugly as fuck, and it was only a couple of blocks.

‘It’s okay Mr. R-Kirishima, I don’t mind. I’ll probably be here for a bit longer, don’t worry about me.”

He probably had other things to tend to, and even if he didn’t, you weren’t important enough to make a Pro-Hero go out of his way to walk you home. You were such an inconvenience already, it would just make you feel worse about yourself. And would you have to make small talk as the two of you walked?

Would he try and insist upon carrying your groceries? Would he want to walk up to your apartment floor with you? Or would he say goodbye in the lobby? Once again, best to just avoid the situation altogether.

Plus, you knew the hero was just trying to be polite. He probably didn’t actually want to walk you home.

Kirishima tried to offer again, but you turned him down, shaking your head, self-consciously drawing your shoulders up. You probably looked so stupid, like a scared little dog that had gotten yelled at. But it was a nervous reaction, and it felt better than just trying to stand there like a block.

Kirishima smiled gently, told you to have a safe night, and then left to go check out.

You turned back to the apples, trying to focus back on which color you should get, stuck between red, or green.

----

The next time you visited Starbucks, your regular spot was once again empty. It was almost a relief, seeing that you wouldn’t have to figure out if Kirishima wanted to talk today or not, if he wanted you to sit by him, or if he was just trying to make small talk back at the grocery store.

So you settled in, warm hot chocolate in hand as you looked out the window, watched cars whiz by on the street, rain puttering down softly.

And then Kirishima was bursting through the door, sending the door bell jingling in a frenzy, rain patterned heavily over his jean jacket, His eyes immediately found you, and his face lit up in a smile.

“(Y/N)!!!!”

You gave a little wave, watching as Kirishima smiled cheerily at you, before quickly ordering a drink. Immediately, the muscled redhead came to sit down in the armchair opposite you, panting a little bit.

“Wooo, I had to run here, started raining on me!”

“I can tell.” You let out a small laugh, noticing how his spiky hair was drooping from getting rained on.

“Glad to see you got home okay the other night.” The male blurted, leaning forward so he could strip off his jacket.

You paused. “What do you mean?”

He flashed you a grin, throwing his jacket over the back of the chair. “Well, you’re here, aren’t you?”

Ah, he had a point.

His name was called, and Kirishima jumped up and went to pick up his drink before plopping back down in the armchair with a sigh.

“So, (Y/N), you ever been to the ocean before? All this water, the streets might be an ocean by the time we leave.”

Kirishima proceeded to launch into a story about the time he went to the ocean with his buddy Bakugou, how they had swam with turtles and even got to see a whale.

You were glad he was doing all the talking, letting you sit back and listen while you sipped at your hot cocoa. There was no pressure for you to talk, no pressure for you to try and fumble for the right words. And it was nice, seeing the big hero be so excited and animated, gesturing with his hands and almost spilling his drink all over himself.

As you listened to him talk, you settled back further into the armchair contentedly. He was a nice person to be around, you could see yourself being friends with him, if he didn’t mind.

——

And friends you did become.

It wasn’t long before the two of you exchanged numbers - Kirishima had wanted to send you a picture of a dog he had seen the other day while he was out patrolling.

The two of you texted memes to each other, cute pictures of animals, and even though your anxiety was loud and demanding and convinced you that you were bothering the man, Kirishima always assured you that was never the case.

He always seemed to be able to tell when you were feeling anxious, when nervousness settled deep in your bones and refused to leave. You slowly began to notice that with Kirishima, your anxiety was quieter. It was easy to let the exuberant man to take the lead, for him to make decisions, whether to walk up and ask to pet the cute dog or not. It was freeing in a way, letting your new friend take your anxiety and make it be quiet.

After all, no one gave you a second glance, now that you were trailing behind Pro-Hero Red Riot.

Kirishima was such a character, goofy, cheerful, and always sporting a sunny disposition. His casual fashion consisted of the most god-awful color combinations and mixed patterns. It wasn’t uncommon for the man to bounce towards you in greeting, wearing neon green crocs, dark blue overalls that were plaid, and a head-ache inducing black-and-white psychedelic shirt. Somehow he made it all work, and didn’t look odd or out of place.

You admired him, truly. You wished you could have his confidence, his attitude and bouncy personality. If you had confidence like that, you could probably do anything. As it stood right now, you could barely approach someone on the street and ask to pet their dog.

It had been so embarrassing, walking with Kirishima down the street and listening to him talk between gulps of a bright pink slushy. You spotted a woman walking a dog on the other side of the street, a big dog, fluffy and sweet-looking and happily walking along it’s owner, stopping to sniff at each plant that grew in the cracks of the sidewalk.

“Cute, I wish I could pet that dog.” You interrupted Kiri’s story, gazing wistfully at the dog.

Kirishima paused, swiveling his head to see what dog you were talking about. Once he did, his eyes lit up, and he grabbed your hand. “Lets go pet it then!” But when he tried to pull you forward, you balked, pulling your wrist backward.

“I-I can’t, it’s….. I don’t know, It’s fine, I’ll stay here.”

Kirishima raised an eyebrow, studying you as he took another slow sip of his slushy. You had your own slushy, a significantly smaller size than the beefy Pro-Hero’s own giant cup.

“(Y/N), it’s okay - I’ll do all the talking, ‘kay?”

He could tell that the thought of talking to the owner, asking to pet their dog, was making you nervous. What if they said no? What if they thought you were being rude? Would the dog not like you? Would the owner think you looked funny? What if they were hurrying somewhere?

But if Kirishima did all the talking….. maybe you could manage trailing behind him, only emerging from his shadow if the owner said yes to petting their dog.

You gave the big man a weak smile, nodding gingerly before getting yanked forward, Kirishima already speed-walking towards the lady.

He asked, the lady said yes - you got to pet the absolute cutest dog ever. It was heaven.

You were grateful for Kirishima - shyly told him as much. If you were by yourself, you would have noticed the cute dog, but done nothing about it, just wished you had the courage to approach and ask if you could pet it.

But with Kiri? He made anything possible.

----

You were worried you were annoying him.

There was no evidence, but still, wouldn’t it be annoying to have an anxious little shadow? One that shook and stuttered and could barely go to the grocery store without freaking out and having a panic attack? Your fears and feelings weren’t entirely unfounded, I mean, there were millions upon millions of possible outcomes of any one action. Unfortunately, your brain liked to focus only on the negative options.

But Kirishima never got tired, never got frustrated with you. He didn’t mind ordering for the both of you when you got snacks at a fast-food place during long afternoons. He didn’t mind taking up extra space with his personality, being loud and brash and drawing attention to himself when you felt like everyone was watching you, waiting for you to make a stupid mistake.

Kiri seemed to like walking you home, helped you check your windows and in the closet and under the bed (not for people, but what if there was some eldritch monster that lurked just out of sight?). He never made fun of you for your feelings or fears, just gently listened and then tried to help you deal with them.

He even got you to be somewhat comfortable with making silly little mistakes in public. One time the man tripped on thin air, spilling warm coffee all over you and himself. Immediately he burst out laughing at his own clumsiness, apologizing between giggles as he heaved himself off the floor and went to go grab napkins.

If you had spilled a drink on him and yourself, you would’ve been asking Siri where the nearest cliff was. But you realized, the same way that you weren’t worried, and how it wasn’t that big of a problem that your shirt was now soaked with sweet coffee and sticking to your skin, Kirishima probably wouldn’t care if you spilled anything on him.

After all, it was an honest mistake.

The big man was helping you to learn how to be more comfortable in the world. But still, the creeping suspicion that he was just being kind to you out of sheer politeness was forefront in your mind.

So you came up with a question, practiced asking it in the mirror, took several days to build up your confidence to ask Kirishima.

“Do you actually want to be friends with me?”

And sure, that might be a forward question. But you valued honesty, had told him so a few times when he asked you to rate his outfit on a scale from 1-10 (usually it was a solid 10 - his personality making the outfit shine) you tried not to lie to others, and expected the same courtesy from them.

The two of you were in the park, resting on one of the benches after walking around and looking at the different plants (one of your favorite activities, no matter how lame). And now was as good a time as ever, so you popped the question, barely stuttering once.

Kirishima was silent for a bit, and you were almost afraid of looking up at him. The truth would come out now - how he just saw a pathetic little civilian and felt so much pity for them that he decided to be their friend. You were just a burden to him, how could you ever be anything else?

When you dared to look up at the big redhead, the intensity in his gaze had you leaning towards the side nervously, away from the strength of all his attention focused on you.

“(Y/N)…. becoming friends with you was - it’s been the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.” His voice held such sincerity, his face open and honest. You recoiled from the statement, uncomfortable with the compliment. That had to be a lie, he was just saying that to make you feel better. You were so pathetic and weak that other people had to pretend that you were better than you actually were to avoid hurting your feelings. You wished you never existed. Why did you even ask him that question in the first place? There was no way that someone as nice as Kirishima would actually tell you how worthless and pitiful you were.

Large hands grabbed your own, and you jumped. Kirishima’s hands were warm, scarred and calloused, yet soft in their grip as they gently squeezed your own hands. You tried not to flinch at the contact.

“I know that you don’t believe me, but you should. You know-“ One of his hands went to run through his hair, tousling through it’s straight, un-gelled style, before returning to your hand. “-I was pretty lonely before I met you. Like, I had my squad - Bakugou and Mina and Denki and Sero…. But it just….. There was something missing.”

Kirishima leaned close to you, your sides pressing together, his red eyes trying to catch your own. You were too shy, had to look off to the side.

“There was someone missing. And when I saw you, it felt…. Everything just clicked. I was missing you.”

You could feel his breath fanning against the side of your flaming hot face. It was uncomfortable. He was lying, he had to be. He was just trying to help you be confident in yourself, so he wouldn’t have to baby you and hold your hand and help you do simple things like ordering food or going for walks and not worrying about what people thought of you.

He was just being nice.

For some reason, you felt your throat clog up, felt the spicy sting of tears building up. Why did you feel like crying? You weren’t exactly in tune with any of your other emotions, only paid attention if it was anxiety or fear.

A thumb rubbed over your knuckles soothingly (it burned), and the next thing you knew you were being enveloped in a bear hug, Kirishima’s arms crushing you into his chest, his pecs pressing against your face.

Goddamn, he was built as fuck.

You tried to keep still, not squirm away from his touch like a child. You were an adult, you could handle a little bit of discomfort over being touched.

Kiri sighed. “I like being around you (Y/N). You don’t judge me for my mistakes, you accept them - you accept me. You uh, you make me happy dude, like, really happy.”

You chuckled a little bit at the redheads use of the word “dude”. Only a meathead could turn a sappy moment on it’s head by using the word “dude”. Still, you liked the way Kirishima talked, from the excited chatter when he was talking about something he liked, to the slow, comforting honey when he was being sincere and intimate, like now.

At the same time, your heart felt tight, waiting for the inevitable but that was sure to come. For the redhead to explain that he enjoyed your company but he was just being polite to a nervous civilian who couldn’t fend for themselves. You fun to hang out with but it was only because you made him look better, cooler and manlier because he was nice to someone as pathetic as you.

The but never came. You waited and waited, but Kirishima just kept the slow rhythm of his thumb rubbing over your knuckles, kept your face pressed into his chest and an arm wrapped around your body. You didn’t know what to do.

Should you pull back? Your throat felt tight again. Kirishima was lying to you, he had to be. There wasn’t any way that someone would actually enjoy you as a person.

You pulled back from the warmth of his body, pulled your hand away from his. “I don’t….. I want honesty Kirishima. Please? Lies hurt more than the truth, please. I’m not a good person, I’m pathetic and nervous and shy, and I’m too loud sometimes, and my body looks weird, and I’m ugly and disgusting, and-“

“(Y/N), stop.” His voice thundered, cutting you off. Immediately, you fell silent, chest tightening, gaze falling to your lap. He was right. He didn’t need to hear all your insecurities, they were already clear to see. You were such a drag on his life, he probably hated having to deal with you, having to see you.

“Kiri, I’m not uhm-“ Your voice was wavering. “-I’m not feeling so great, I think I’m gonna head home.”

As you stood, so did the redhead. “Please don’t feel obligated to walk me home, I know it’s way out of your way.” He probably hated every second of it, probably insisted just to be polite. Even now, Kirishima was beginning to protest, grabbing at your hand. You pulled back, eyes fixed on the ground.

“Kiri, please.” You whispered, tears threatening to fall. You hated yourself. You hated yourself so much, your chest hurt, your ears felt full, everything felt too heavy and bad - there weren’t even any words to explain it. You just wanted to go home and cry, sob into a pillow.

Kirishima stayed put, probably watching you walk away from the park. God, you hoped he wasn’t, you walked so weirdly. Why couldn’t you just disappear?

——

You tried your best to disappear.

You did the bare minimum, turning in assignments an hour before they were due, half-assing them. You hardly ventured out of your room, only to grab water or to use the bathroom.

Neighbors kept knocking on your door, probably the couple in the apartment opposite you, asking for a cup of sugar so they could make cookies, or wanting to tell you that your mail downstairs was getting full. But being the person you were, you were far too nervous to go answer the door. You were probably annoying people. It would just be better for the world if you weren’t in it, wouldn’t it?

Kirishima kept trying to text you, call you (Even though he knew you couldn’t pick up - calls terrified you), trying to coax you to go on a walk with him, to come get coffee or a slushie with him when he finished working. You brushed him off with lame excuses, telling him you were sick, backtracking when he said he was coming over with soup and movies. You didn’t feel well enough for company.

Still, the man kept texting you several times a day, then only a few times, and now it was down to just once a day. In one corner of your mind, it hurt. The rest of your mind knew that it was for the best, knew that his life was going to be better because you weren’t going to be there bothering him.

His texts consisted of simple messages now, ones you felt bad not responding to, but if you did respond, you hated yourself for the rest of the day. You sucked.

“(Y/N), look at this dog!” *IMAGE ATTACHED*

Cute.

“Yo, you wanna come get something to drink at our place? They have a deal on coffee today!”

Sorry Kiri, I’m not feeling too good today. You should go get a drink though, have fun!

“I saw some people rollerskating in the park, we should try that!”

Yeah.

“Would you wanna go for a walk sometime?”

I don’t think so, I’m pretty busy right now. You should go and get sunshine though, you deserve it!

“We need to go to our Starbucks soon, I need COFFEE haha”

“Gonna ever come see where I work? I can show you my office, it’s super cool!”

“(Y/N), you doing okay?”

“I miss you.”

----

You woke up to the sound of your neighbors (or maybe the complex manager?) knocking on your door. Anxiety filled you, palms immediately becoming clammy, so you fumbled around your bed, searching for your earbuds. Maybe if you could listen to music, you could calm down? Sometimes that worked, sometimes not. It really depended on how worked up you were.

Luckily you found them, quickly stuffing them in your ears as you queued music up on your phone. The knocking faded out as music filled your ears, but your anxiety still persisted. You curled up onto your side, hugging a pillow to your chest, almost on the verge of tears from nothing more than a few knocks at your door. You were such a burden to society.

It took a minute, but your heart stopped racing, palms stopped sweating, and you fell back asleep. You were so tired of being awake.

----

You awoke a second time to hands carding gently through your hair. It felt weird for a brief second, but you just ignored the feeling - until you remembered that you lived alone, and the front door was supposed to be locked.

Squeaking in panic, you shot up, eyes wide, scrambling back into the corner of your bed, clutching the blanket to your chest.

Kirishima blinked at you, hand still hovering over where your he’d had previously been. He was sitting on the edge of your bed, shoes off, bare feet on the floor.

Your eyes were still wide with fear, chest heaving with panic, but you managed to rip out your earbuds. “Kirishima? How-how did you get in?!? What are you….” You trailed off, tugging your blanket closer around your body as you realized that you were in your pajamas. They weren’t provocative, nor exposed any skin, but they drowned your form, were probably stained and most likely dirty, and you definitely looked awful. But back to the issue at hand, how did Kiri get in your apartment?

The man in question gave a dorky little wave, lips quirking up ever so slightly.

“(Y/N), hey! I haven’t seen you in so long!” He paused for a second, and when he spoke again, his voice was softer, more serious. “I missed you… I was kinda worried.”

“But how are you- I mean…. inside?” You stuttered, completely flustered.

“Oh, I talked to the complex manager, said I was a family member who was really worried about you. Showed him how you haven’t been answering my texts…. I was really worried (Y/N). You were giving such weird replies to my texts, and then you stopped answering completely, and no one answered the door whenever I knocked.”

Wait, that was him knocking? All those times?

You were going to jump out the window.

“Kiri… I didn’t mean to worry you, I just… You shouldn’t be worried about me.”

“Why not? I care about you, I… I wanted to see you.”

It was time to be honest, say the things that were painful to say. The truths that hurt your heart, but needed to be said. Otherwise, Kirishima just wouldn’t get it.

“Kiri, I’m not-I’m not worth your worry. I don’t deserve it. I’m a nervous, depressed wreck, who can’t even open a door or answer the phone. You’re-you’re being nice to me cause you’re a good person. I don’t think I should be… well, like, around you. I just-I bring you down, and you have to do stuff for me and reassure me and I’m such a burden. Please just, I don’t know, please just don’t give me any more attention. I’m so stupid and gross and you should be friends with someone who isn’t….. isn’t like me.”

You finished your rant, almost breathless, choked up, feeling ready to cry.

Silence reigned between the two of you, everything quiet except for the sound of your breathing and the rhythmic clicking of your fan.

It was uncomfortable. But you’d said your piece. It’d be weird if you said anything else, right? Should you say something else? Was he going to hate you for wasting his time? Holy crap, Kirishima is gonna hate you for wasting his time, for not telling him that at the beginning, when he first got to know you.

“(Y/N)-“ The sound of Kirishima’s soft, low voice made your head snap up, up to his face. He was looking at you, red eyes dark and large and filled with… pity? Sadness? “-I don’t even know how to tell you how wrong you are about that.”

The blanket shrouding your body was quickly pulled away, Kirishima discarding it to the side so he could shuffle closer to you, wrap you in one of his signature death-grip hugs. You were quickly pulled into his arms, the large man hunched over you as he squeezed you tight. It didn’t feel good. You wished he would remember that you didn’t like to be touched.

“I was pretty sure of my feelings before… well, before you asked if I wanted to be friends with you. And truthfully, I wasn’t exactly honest with you.” Your heart gave the tiniest squeeze. You knew he had been lying to you, but yeah, it did kinda hurt to hear him admit it.

“I kinda wanna be more than friends with you, actually.”

His hold on your body loosened, pulling back so he could look at your face. Your ugly, about-to-cry, gross face. You tried to turn away, pull out of his grip and find your blanket and crawl underneath it and stay there until you died. There was no way he was coming onto you - you weren’t good enough for him. He was Kirishima, Red Riot, pro hero, sunshine of the world, manliest and strongest guy out there.

And you were just….

You.

Kirishima didn’t let you move away. He grabbed your arms, pulled you up a bit so you were at his level. “I’m serious about this. I know you don’t believe me, all that anxiety and nervousness trying to lie to you, but….” A quick glance at his face showed the redhead to be blushing. “I’ve wanted to be more than friends from the moment I first saw you.”

Exasperated, almost angry at this point (he was lying), you scoffed, wiggling in his grip to signal that you wanted to let go.

“Kiri, I held a door open for you, it was nothing special. I’m ugly and lame and I panic over the slightest things, stop lying to me and saying that I’m someone worth your time.” Surprised, Kirishima loosened his grasp on your arms, and you moved away from him to sit on the edge of the bed. “I could never be worth your time.”

Was silence becoming a trend between the two of you? Apparently, because Kirishima didn’t say anything, just crawled over and sat down next to you. The big man was hardly ever silent, always talking about this, that, or the other. You were just a pro at messing things up, weren’t you?

A moment longer of sitting awkwardly in silence. You couldn’t take it anymore, you wanted to be able to cry about your shameful existence in peace, without having to entertain Kiri’s pity and lies.

“Can you….. Can you-you go…. Please?” You whispered, hugging your arms around your body. Oh yeah, you had forgotten you were in your gross, oversized pajamas. Just another thing for you to feel bad about.

Kirishima didn’t move.

Afraid he hadn’t heard you, you turned bright red, what an idiot - you can’t even speak loud enough to be heard. You stuttered as you started to repeat your request, but Kirishima cut you off.

“Why can’t you see?” He turned to you. “You’re the most lovely thing, I want to be around you all the time. Why can’t you see that you’re the most wonderful person in the world?”

Horrified, you reeled back. He was just pushing more lies. You felt so uncomfortable, you hated this, you wanted him to stop. “That’s-that’s just some fantasy Kiri…. I’m awful. Please, just go-“

“No.”

No? His voice sounded different, harsh and filled with authority. You looked at your feet, settled against the bare floor. You just wanted to sleep, and sleep, and never have to wake up. Why did being a human have to be so hard?

Might as well let the big redhead say his piece, make you feel worse about yourself. Then you could shove him out the door and spend the next week sobbing yourself sick.You felt bad, you couldn’t even explain your own emotions, put a name to this feeling that was painful and clawed at your chest like it was trying to rip you apart.

“You aren’t understanding me (Y/N). That’s no fantasy of mine - that’s reality.” A large hand grabbed your chin softly, turning your face towards Kiri’s. “Whenever I come up with a fantasy that involves you, I end up fucking my fist ’til I go raw.”

The admission made you stutter, and you hadn’t thought it was possible for you to blush harder, but here you were - twelve shades redder than the reddest tomato.

Kiri didn’t give you a chance to breathe. “I missed you so much, you don’t even realize. I could compliment you until I go blue in the face, but you’re so shy and nervous and adorable, you’d never, ever believe me.”

Well, that much was true. At least he knew you well.

“So instead, I’m just gonna show you how much you mean to me.”

Soft lips met your own, a hand fisting into your hair and twisting your head back to make kissing you easier for Kiri. You couldn’t even think, barely had presence of mind to push at the solid man, hitting his chest. You felt ugly, and gross, and stupid and weak, was this some sort of prank? This had to be some sort of prank. There’s no way Kirishima could actually be attracted to you.

Your mind was drawn to the present when a sharp blossom of pain emanated from your lip. Kiri pulled back, a single drop of blood running down his chin as he stared at you, your foreheads almost touching.

“Don’t get in your head, I want you here. Don’t think, just feel.”

You wanted to say something, to open your mouth and ask him again to leave. He shouldn’t be kissing you, he should be kissing someone prettier, stronger, someone who had their life together.

You wanted to protest, but you were being pushed onto your back on the bed, Kiri’s large, calloused hands grabbing at your limbs and bodily moving you however he saw fit despite your squirming.

“Kir-stop-stop touching! Don’t, please, I’m-I’m so gross-“

His lips were on yours again, swallowing your cries as he moved the two of you around on the small bed until you were splayed out underneath him. He was moving so quickly, with such confidence and self-assuredness that you couldn’t keep up. His hands were starting to squeeze at your waist, his thighs bracketing your own as the big man got comfortable over you, leaning down to avoid breaking the deep, passionate kiss.

Your lungs were burning.

You had to pull your face to the side, pushing at Kiri’s shoulders as you did so, making panicked noises as you tried (and failed) to take in air through your nose. How the hell was Kiri holding his breath this long?

The man finally got the hint, letting you pull away from him, gasping for air. You felt dizzy, his hands were still squeezing and stroking over your waist, it was too much. As you tried to get your breathing under control, you glanced up at your friend, red-faced, on the verge of tears. Why was he doing this? You were so gross, ugly, nothing when compared to how fit and muscular and handsome Kirishima was.

HIs eyes were dark, chin smeared red from the blood earlier - you bet your chin looked the same. His chest rose and fell rapidly, seemingly also out of breath, but the moment your eyes met his, the man was descending again, this time to press hot kisses all over your face, on your jaw, behind your ears.

“Don’t, oh, please don’t. Kiri-why are you-? Stop-“ You gasped, the sensations of his lips trailing across your skin too much for you to handle. A kiss to the column of your throat had you jolting, trying to sit up, not knowing what you were doing but trying to get away. It was too much.

“Lay back.” Kiri’s deep voice rumbled. “Let me make you feel good. You’ll forget about the anxiety, okay? Just focus on me.”

You didn’t want to focus on him. But at the same time, the situation was so overwhelming, you didn’t know what to do except let him push you back down with a hand on your chest.

Before you could process what happened, your clothes were off, his clothes gone as well. You wanted to shriek; cry and cover yourself and tell Kirishima to leave, but everything was happening too fast, and your body couldn’t keep up.

You felt floaty, buzzy, like you were in a weird dream, ears stopped up full of cotton.

Wet fingers prodded at your entrance. Oh, were they Kiri’s? When had they gotten wet? The fingers retracted, and you watched Kirishima gather the saliva in his mouth before spitting onto his hand.

Ah.

The fingers were back, one pushing into you, the pressure too deep, too tight, too harsh. You knew in the back of your mind that you probably looked so stupid, gasping and shivering and shaking, but you couldn’t control it.

One finger turned into two, then three, then four, and then they were gone, something much bigger trying to split you open.

You felt sick.

You couldn’t move.

Kirishima was kissing your face again, his touch burning, making your skin feel tingly and painful and rough everywhere he touched. It hurt. He was saying something, but your ears were buzzing, everything felt fuzzy and weird, and you didn’t know where to look, what to do, except lie there and let the man continue.

He was soft, gentle. But no amount of easy touches or reassuring words were getting through to you, just the overwhelming sensation of being too full, nausea thick in your stomach, throat closing up. The room tasted like blood.

The pressure wasn’t going away, just building and building and building as Kirishima thrust into you, until eventually a twinge of pleasure slipped into your system alongside the discomfort of being filled.

It felt weird… nice? You couldn’t tell anymore.

There was only sweat, slick, slapping noises, rough hands running over your skin, words being said. You couldn’t grasp anything.

You felt full, empty, all at the same time.

The pleasure built, higher and higher and higher until it burst into little sharp fragments that ran through your veins, zinging into your wrists, sparking through your tummy.

And then there was warmth inside you, and the part of you still lucid recognized that Kirishima had just cum inside your body.

You couldn’t get enough air into your lungs.

----

Kirishima was laying beside you, making shushing sounds, stroking your hair, pulling the blanket up around the two of you. The pressure between your legs was gone, as was the stinging pleasure that had spilled all over your body. You couldn’t feel, everything was still too much, too loud and bright and rough and warm.

Kirishima was still stroking your hair as you finally calmed down, hyperventilating coming to a stop, shaking still there, but not as violent as it had been.

“-so strong, and your laugh always makes me happy. I love you, and I know you love me back. It’s gonna take some time for us to work past all this nervous stuff, but I’m not give up. I’ll always be here for you, you know that?”

He was rambling, occasionally pressing soft kisses to your neck, along your collarbone - innocent, reassuring. You closed your eyes.

“You need someone to be there for you, I know. You get so anxious, and you bottle up your feelings, and I know you get so scared of saying or doing the wrong thing and you just freeze or panic.” He continued. “You won’t ever have to worry about that with me. We worked around it today, yeah? You just relax, and let me lead. I’m never gonna steer you wrong (Y/N).”

You felt cold.

#yandere #yandere kirishima eijirou #yandere boku no hero academia #kirishima #yandere kirishima eijiro #yandere kirishima #bnha kirishima #kirishima x reader #kirishima eijirou #anxiety #tw noncon #tw dubcon #panic attack

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yomiurinikei · 3 years

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sdra2 boys as what i think they'd order when getting boba. i'll do the girls if u all like this but they aren't here rn because i tried to do full cast and i started this in like. may i had to compromise somewhere and rewrite with a smaller group. under the cut for length and all 8 sdra male participants

yuri: always always always asks for recommendations. could literally be allergic to smthn recommended to him and would just. get in nonetheless. makes a note of his favorite things he's tried, so he can order those when he doesn't wanna try to flirt with the cashier. likes sweeter/fruit flavored tea, and tapioca. internally cries if he's recommended a blended drink. still gets it nonetheless

hajime: he's in pain the whole time they're going to get boba. he doesn't wanna be here. is about to just ask for a water. would ask for 1000 customizations to make it "healthier" but feels embarrassed doing that if he's ordering in person instead of online. he'd like popping boba if he tried it but he's not in the mood to be adventurous when he's been bullied into getting a drink so he prolly just gets brown sugar or matcha with tapioca

shinji: isn't rlly crazy abt the trends/social media and has been in a coma so like. his hand has to be held a little bit but!! once he's worked out what all the different options mean and understands he has to think about how things will taste together, he's excited! tends to stick with just one order, but it makes him happy :] gets something light, like lavender tea with tapioca, but will occasionally go for more flavored things when he needs the boost, maybe passionfruit tea + raspberry popping boba

nikei: likes to try new drinks on his own, but when ordering with others (relaying his order for them to pick up, or just going out for boba with a group) will stick with whichever of a few comfort orders he likes. needs to have boba less often tbh. maybe if we put water flavored popping boba in a glass of water, he'll drink that. actually has a good amount of variety in his comfort orders but..... it's still not a balanced diet

teruya: boba extraordinaire but also. kinda not.... he's so adventurous and knows of so many different flavors and add-ins and customizations. not only is it a pain to make but also there is no way it tastes good at this point. the others simply watch in horror. who knows if he likes his monstrosity or not, he's committed to the part. would prolly like the cups that are split in two so u can have two flavors

yuuki: prolly doesn't get boba toooo often because it's just not his #1 fave? he's not the sort to go out just for boba. bc of this he sticks to the classics a lot and hasn't been very adventurous in his choices. likes his brown sugar milk tea with tapioca :] within like... two trips this will be keyed into, and he will be bullied into at least trying other flavors/getting sips of other drinks.

syobai: ,,,,would he??? order boba???????? like a lot of this has been personal orders v with a group but. either way would he get any? his teeth r prolly rlly fucked up so we wanna give him smthn so sugary. for whatever reason when i think of him j think of kiwi + tapioca boba but.... idek if that would taste good and even then can you imagine him ordering that? i can actually see him stealing the others drinks if they don't guard them close enough just because so,,, i suppose that makes senss

mikado: may his boba always be undercooked and his tea always poorly brewed. he's not invited to get boba bc the one time he was invited he got a cup of just cheese foam and also because he is a little bitch

#sdra2 #headcanons #yuri kagarin #hajime makunouchi #shinji kasai #nikei yomiuri #teruya otori #mikado sannoji #yuki maeda #syobai hashimoto

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inskz · 4 years

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raspberry popsicle - hwang hyunjin

pairing - hwang hyunjin + convenience store worker!reader

genre - lots of fluff, a bit of angst ??? idk i hope u cry a little at the end lmao

warnings - alcohol and cigarette

words - 12+k

summary - a beautiful stranger comes to the convenience store you work at during summer every single day to buy raspberry popsicles

note - this is the first time i finally managed to finish an english fic so i thought why not post it! please bear with the inconsistencies this was written at 3am while i was feeling rlly nostalgic abt a summer i didn’t have 🥴. enjoy!!!

-----

Hyunjin met you on the warmest day of August.

He could barely keep his eyes open, even hidden behind his square-shaped sunglasses, as he walked down the street, the scorching heat of the sun forcing him to take refuge in the closest 7/11 he managed to find on google maps.

The excessive air conditioning slapped his cheeks when the sliding doors opened. Even though he felt like his throat was already itching, warning him not to stay too long if he did not want to catch a cold, he was thankful to escape momentarily the living hell that was a summer in Jeju. Warm rays of sunlight were replaced by glitching neon lights. At this hour of the day, the convenience store was pretty much empty. The whole town must have been gathered at the beach. He could feel a bead of sweat dripping down his neck at the simple thought of all the bodies piled up on the sand. When he finally found the freezer, he grabbed a raspberry popsicle. It had always been his favorite for as long as he could remember.

At first, you did not notice him approaching the checkout, too immersed in the music blasting in your earphones. In fact, your music was so loud, Hyunjin was able to make out the bass. Indie rock, he assumed. An old fan was blowing lukewarm air in your messy hair. As you finished your umpteenth spin on your rusty stool, your eyes finally met his.

"Sorry. Did not see you there," you said, jumping up and taking off your earphones in a hurry, as if you were caught red-handed. Your boss must have forbidden you to listen to music on your shifts, he guessed. You stuffed the tangled cords deep in the pocket of your forest green sleeveless vest. Hyunjin couldn’t help but wonder how someone could look that good in this horrid uniform.

"It's okay," Hyunjin muttered but you did not seem to hear him as you were too busy taping on the cash register's screen. His cheeks felt hot all the sudden, but for once it was not from the heat of the sun.

"One fifty please". He proceeded to empty out his pockets, the golden coins landing on the counter with a loud noise. Without even glancing at him, you put them in the cash-drawer.

And as quickly as he came, Hyunjin was out the door, the burning air engulfing him again, sinking into every pore of his skin. But he could not bring himself to go home yet. Instead, he sat under the shade of the parasol installed in front of the convenience store’s window, glancing occasionally at you.

Unconsciously, a smile grew on his lips as he saw that you were already back to your antics, earphones in your ears, bopping your head to the sound of your playlist.

He did not realize how long he had been sitting here until he felt a sticky liquid running down his fingers. His popsicle had melted. “Fuck”, he muttered as he saw that his white vans were now tinted pink.

-----

You’d be lying if you said the stranger’s daily visits were not the only reason you looked forward to starting your shift at 6 in the morning while all your friends were still fast asleep after long nights of partying. He would come every day around 2, except on Sundays when the shop would be closed, to get his raspberry treat.

After a week, your exchanges still had not gotten further than the usual “hello”, “one fifty please”, “thanks” and “goodbye”. Not that you did not have the desire to, but because you have always been terrified of small talk. How you got hired despite your constant resting bitch face was an unsolved mystery.

On Thursday, he entered the 7/11 at exactly 2:13 PM and, as always, went straight to the freezer. You immediately turned up the volume of your music to silence your ridiculously intense heartbeat. Of course, you blamed it on your social anxiety. What more could it be?

While he was choosing his ice cream, you could not help but stare at his broad back. You noticed how strands of bleached hair escaped from his black bucket hat. How the collar of his Hawaiian shirt was slightly crooked, causing your fingers to ache to fix it. How the bottom of his jean shorts was getting a little bit more frayed each day. How his white vans were stained pink.

The sound of the freezer’s door slamming shut made you come back to your senses. You could not bring yourself to look at him in the eyes when he finally reached the checkout. Instead, the yellow color of the popsicle he slid onto the counter immediately caught your attention.

“Don’t we have any raspberry ones left?” you thought out loud. You only realized these words actually came out of your mouth when it you saw the boy’s eyes widen and his lips part in surprise. A wave of embarrassment hit you. He must have thought you were a crazy stalker, taking note of what he was buying every single day.

“Oh, no you got plenty left... I just wanted to try something new, I guess,” he said.

It was the first time you saw his true smile, not just the polite kind. It was shy at first, but then it bloomed across his flushed cheeks causing the skin of his nose to wrinkle and his eyes to turn into shining crescents. Never had you seen such a pretty vision. The type of vision that was making your heart ache. You wanted to answer him so badly, to keep the conversation going for hours. But no matter how hard you thought, nothing came to your mind.

"One fifty, please" were all the words you managed to say with your usual nonchalant tone. You fought the urge to slap yourself when you saw his smile slowly fading, a hint of disappointment crossing his face.

Not wanting this mortifying episode to last any longer, you quickly took his bill from his hands and gave him his change almost instantly. As soon as he disappeared behind the sliding doors, a loud sigh escaped your lips, resonating in the empty aisles. You let your head fall on the counter, your eyes already closing in an attempt to calm your nerves.

Why did you have to be so damn cold?

-----

Hyunjin’s vacations were about to come to an end, yet the heat was just as unbearable as when they started. Time had stopped. Days were endless, suffocating, empty. They blended together to create a vicious and infinite loop. The sun did not seem to be wanting to set and put an end to Hyunjin’s misery. It felt like a stifling drought interrupted his fast-paced life. Like scissors cut off his wings, violently bringing him back to the ground. No matter how hard he tried, he could not bring himself to enjoy his time off.

First of all, because it was not his choice. When the company announced a summertime hiatus for Stray Kids, it came as a surprise for everyone. It just did not feel right, not after their recent successes. But like many other decisions, it wasn’t in their power. They were sent home and forced to rest.

Mostly because he was supposed to join his parents on their trip to Jeju, but the universe decided otherwise. At the last minute, his grandmother broke her wrist by falling in the stairs and his father’s boss resigned. Nothing too alarming in itself, but his mother had to be by his grandmother’s bedside and his father had to take care of the tasks suddenly left uncompleted by his now former superior.

This is how Hyunjin, who was so used to be surrounded by seven brothers from another mother, ended up watching all the episodes of Hotel de Luna, twice, alone, in an empty beach house for two weeks straight. In the beginning, he found it kind of enjoyable. He spent the first few days sleeping-in, taking endless showers, eating snacks for breakfast, lunch and dinner. But slowly he started to miss waking up at dawn, racing to get in the shower first, fighting for the drumstick when they ordered chicken. Now it was almost unbearable. He hated the silence that he once longed for.

Of course, he thought about calling his friends and family on the phone. And he did at first, but as soon as he would hang up his loneliness would grow, multiply, swallow him whole. So, he had stopped. He also thought about going out and meeting new people. But he got so used to always having his members by his side that he forgot about how you even make new ones. He felt like a fool, not even being able to do the usual tasks of a normal teenager.

The only interaction with another living being he had was with you. Each day, he was counting the hours until he would go buy a raspberry popsicle, especially if it meant that he would see your face. Admittedly, you did not seem as excited to see his. You weren’t cheerful nor loquacious. Your whole body screamed “go away” but he still felt drawn to you. Maybe it was the way you’d mimic the drums with your fingers when you were absorbed by your music. Or how pretty you looked in that green uniform. Or the fact that you remembered raspberry was his favorite flavor.

That day, he decided loneliness had become too heavy of a burden for him. He wasn’t really realizing what he was doing when he grabbed a second popsicle out of the freezer. Afraid that he might chicken out if he thought about it too long, he walked so fast to the checkout that he almost bumped in the pile of baskets sitting next to your stool. He felt a slight relief when he saw that you noticed his purchase was different than the usual by the way you had furrowed your brows.

“Hey. This one is for you”, he said, sliding the bright pink wrapper across the counter.

Instead of reaching for the treat, your fingers started to play with the cord of your earphones. For once, you looked at him straight in the eyes. Normally you would be too focused on your cash register's screen to pay attention to him. As his confidence was melting under your gaze like an ice cream under the sun, he wondered if he actually didn’t like it better when you didn’t stare at him. Your expression was unreadable, at least for him. He had never been good at those type of things anyways.

“It must be hard to work during vacations” he added with a voice that seemed to be about to crack. He could not help but scratch the back of his head in an attempt to fight back his embarrassment.

He swore he caught a glimpse of the corners of your mouth slightly curl up, betraying your regular nonchalance. “Thanks” you responded with your usual tone, as you grabbed the popsicle, but the ghost of a smile was still lingering on your face. “3 dollars please”. He gave you the exact amount and was already on his way to the exit.

He felt a bit disappointed by your reaction but what was he even expecting? As he was trying to convince himself to be content with just seeing your smile, as discreet as it was, he heard your voice, piercing through the noise of the neon lights and refrigerators buzzing.

“Wait. I have my break in 10 minutes… Can you wait for me? We can eat it outside”. Was he hallucinating or did you actually asked him to eat together? He had to check your face several times to make sure he had not gotten crazy. Considering the way you were staring at him with your eyebrow arched, he figured he wasn’t dreaming and you were impatiently waiting for his answer. “I have to go get some fresh air anyways”, you added, trying to fill the uncomfortable silence.

“Sure”, he finally said, doing his best to keep his cool but he knew too well that his face had turned crimson red.

“I gotta put the popsicles back into the freezer otherwise it will be melted by then”. Your fingers reached for his. He noticed how small your hand seemed next to his, how the black polish on your nails was chipped, how cold your skin felt against his.

Once he was sure you were holding the popsicles, he sprinted out of the convenience-store. It was only when he got outside that he realized he had been holding his breath all this time.

-----

The next 10 minutes felt like a real ordeal. Not even the last album of the Strokes blasting in your earphones could distract you from the fact that the cutest boy you had ever seen was sitting on the sidewalk waiting for you, right in the middle of your field of vision.

You decided to swivel your stool towards the old clock instead. Seven minutes left before you could take your break. Your foot was tapping frantically on the white tiles. You were not sure if you wanted the minute hand to reach the 6 already or to stop right here in its track. Get this over with already or never have to talk to the boy again.

No matter how hard you tried to ignore his presence, you just could not. Maybe if the small TV mounted on the wall had been playing something a little bit more interesting than ads for beers and tampons you would have been able to, but sadly it was not the case.

You finally caved in, your gaze going back to him. Once again, you couldn’t help but stare at his shoulders. Unfortunately, he ended up turning around, catching you ogling. “Shit” you whispered under your breath, mortified.

That was it, you thought. Even though there were still 2 more minutes left on the clock, you couldn’t stay here anymore. Otherwise you would have probably died of embarrassment by the time would be up.

You went to find the two popsicles you had put back into the freezer. You also decided to grab two cokes on your way out. You let out a loud breath, unsuccessfully trying to release the tension that had built up in your chest, before the sliding doors opened.

“Here” you said, holding out the popsicle and the drink to the boy. He grabbed it with a small “thank you” and a soft smile. The concrete burned the back of your thighs, left exposed by your worn-out denim shorts, when you sat by his side. The bright blue of the sky hurt your pupils. There wasn’t a single cloud on the horizon.

“I forgot how hot it was outside” you finally said. And you really meant it. It felt like you just went from a fridge to a 390 degrees oven.

“You work all day?” he asked, his face turning to yours. You noticed that he was already halfway through his coke. He must have been so thirsty. You felt bad for making him wait under the sun.

You nodded, as you took a sip of the beverage. “From 6 to 9. I start and finish my shift when the weather is still bearable” you explained.

You looked at your bare arms that were already heating up. They did not see the sun more than a few times this summer. You must have looked ill compared to the tanned vacationers. “I did not put sunscreen on” you said, thinking about how your mom used to nag you when you were young when you would stay under the sun for too long.

“You should probably go sit under the shade”, he suggested, his head turning to the plastic chair the convenience store had provided.

As you sat in it, you could not help but wonder if he purposely saved the place for you. It was positioned in such a way that you couldn’t clearly see the boy’s face, only his back and a bit of his profile. And what a profile. Chiseled jaw, delicate nose, pouty lips, pierced ears. You found yourself enjoying the view way more than you should have been. There was something so pleasant about being able to take a closer look at someone without being scrutinized back. But the lovely vision was disturbed by the beads of sweat that were forming at your eyebrows. You wiped it off quickly with the back of your hand.

“I fucking hate summer breaks” you sighed. The words came out harsher than you expected as you tore the fuchsia wrapper that protected the popsicle.

“Could not agree more” he said, between two licks. The way he was eating his popsicle was just sinful, you thought.

“Really? That’s an unpopular opinion though.”

“I guess I’m not used to breaks,” he shrugged.

“What do you do?” His answer had spiked your curiosity. He looked fairly young, around the same age as you. You wondered what kind of occupation would take up so much time of his life. Worker at a factory? Top athlete? Freelancer?

Oddly enough, he took a few seconds to answer as if he was not sure himself. “I’m a hip-hop dancer” he finally said, turning around to see your reaction.

“No offense but that sounds like an all year long vacation to me” you teased him.

A laugh escaped his pink lips. Ringing and honest. It was music to your ears. “It’s really not, trust me. What about you?”.

“I’m a college student. I’m majoring in macroeconomics”. His once innocent smile turn into a teasing one. You rolled your eyes but the corners of your lips, already curling up, betrayed you. “I know. Sounds boring. It’s boring actually”.

“I always wondered what the usual college student day looks like”.

“Wake up. Eat. Drink. Party. Sleep. Repeat. Oh, and sometimes go to class,” you counted on your fingers.

“TV shows are not lying then?” he asked, cocking his brow.

“They are. They make it seem fun when in reality it’s just the same stupid people doing the same stupid shit every single day. It gets exhausting really quickly... Oh and don’t get me started on hangovers, they make you regret going everytime.” You stopped your rant there and went back to eating your popsicle, afraid that you might have made him uneasy.

But it didn’t seem like it. Instead, he looked pensive, almost sad. “I wish I could live like that sometimes...”

“What’s keeping you from partying right now? You’re here with you parents?” Vacations were the perfect time to get wasted so it was surprising he did not seize the opportunity to do so, like all the other teens in town.

“I was supposed to, but something came up last minute. So, I’m all by myself. I don’t know anybody here,” he admitted. Although he turned his head to the other side, hiding his face from you, you could sense a bit of embarrassment in his voice.

You both fell silent, acting like you were too busy eating your popsicles to talk. You didn’t know when you decided to speak up. You couldn’t even remember what your train of thought was. But here you were, about to say a sentence you had never thought you would be saying to stranger one day.

“Hey, I’m meeting with my friends tonight. Do you wanna come?” The heat had probably melted your brain, you thought. There was no way you would have uttered those words if you had been in your right mind. You held your breath, waiting for his answer.

His eyes immediately went back to yours, lighting up with expectancy. “Will they be okay with it?”

“I think so. They always bring a plus one last minute without warning me. So that will be my revenge” you laughed, trying to conceal the nervousness that was growing in your stomach as you were realizing the implications of your offer.

“You sure?”

An old man was coming your way, a large shopping bag on his shoulders. A curse escaped your lips as you checked your phone. It was way past your break time. “If you insist, I’ll call them to ask. I gotta go.” As the client entered the shop, you quickly got up and threw the popsicle stick in the closest bin, along with the wrapper “I don’t get why you’re so obsessed with this popsicle, it’s really not that good”, you muttered on your way to the entrance.

“Wait. Where do we meet up tonight?” he stuttered as he sprung to his feet.

“Be there by 9” you yelled before disappearing being the sliding doors.

-----

When the client left, his basket full of oranges and peaches, you decided to call your friend as promised. You reluctantly pressed Minju’s contact picture. In order to have your hands free and be able to refill the aisles with ramen packets, you stuck your phone between your ear and shoulder. You regretted it immediately when she picked up the phone, her loud voice hurting your eardrum.

“You better not be calling me to cancel tonight’s plans.” You’d be lying if you said that the absence of any kind of greetings came as a surprise. Her answer was easily explainable by the fact that your phone calls were rarely auspicious since you despised calling and only did it instead of texting when you had something to apologize for.

“Yeah, about that… Just wanted to warn you, I’m bringing a friend tonight”. You could not help but wince at your own words, already predicting her answer.

“You have other friends than us?” She asked in her famous mocking tone, making you regret instantly your prior boldness. It was so unlike you to invite a total stranger and Minju knew it too well.

“I met him recently, he comes to the shop everyday”, you tried to explain.

“He? A boy?” She gasped and your mind could clearly imagine her shocked face as if she was standing right in front of you, hands on the cheeks and mouth agape. You’re pretty sure your eyes rolled all the way back to your head.

Your friend must have guessed it because you could hear her repressing a giggle. “Okay, okay” She said, regaining her composure. “What’s the lucky man’s name?” she allowed herself to ask. A sudden realization hit you.

You did not even know his name.

-----

As Hyunjin walked down the same street, his pace faster than usual, he felt his heartbeat increase and his hands getting clammy. The sun had not set yet, but the sky’s color had changed, shades of pink and oranges replacing the garish blue. A fresh breeze was tickling his nose and caressing his cheeks. The linen shirt he wore would probably come handy by the end of the night, when the air would have completely cooled off but for now, the tension in his body was making him sweat profusely. He felt like a frightened teenager going to his first party. Which, to be honest, was not that far from the truth.

When he entered the shop, you were running everywhere, apologizing for being late. He offered his help to close the shop, which you accepted but only after he insisted. Fifteen minutes later, as you were finally about to lower the shutters and leave, you stopped dead in your tracks.

“We can’t come empty handed”, you muttered to yourself. You went back into the 7/11 and grabbed a pack of beers and a bottle of coke from the fridge, as well as a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of vodka behind the counter. The night promised to be eventful and Hyunjin could not help but feel slightly excited as if he was about to break the rules. And in fact, he was probably going to break his company’s rules tonight.

Even at this hour, the subway was packed by teenagers going out for the night and businessmen coming home late to their family. It forced the both of you to stay quiet, the chatters and the rails’s screeching making you unable to hear each other anyways.

Hyunjin caught a glimpse of your reflection in the window. You looked tired, staring into space, as you were holding the heavy bottles. He could sense that you definitely weren’t as excited as him to go out. Your body was slouching against the metal door, as if you carried the weight of the world on your shoulder.

At each station, you would mindlessly move aside to let people get on and off. He could not help but stare at your features that had seemed to age in a matter of hours. You looked jaded, as if you already saw everything that life had to offer you and that it did not live up to your expectations.

Hyunjin couldn’t help but wonder if you regretted inviting him. He unsuccessfully tried to ease his mind by convincing himself it was probably the long day of work you had behind you and not his presence that was making this apathetic.

Moments later, you were already at the host’s door, pushing on the intercom’s button reluctantly. The person that picked up did not even care to ask you who you were before allowing you in.

Hyunjin was surprised there wasn’t any beer pong table or bowl of punch. No expensive mansion, no pool filled with girls in bikinis, no flashing lights, no blasting electro music. Only about twenty tipsy teenagers gathered around the couch and the dining table, sipping on cheap drinks and sharing cigarettes, listening to commercial music. It looked nothing like the movies but at least Hyunjin felt a little bit less nervous in this familiar setting.

-----

You could not bother to go around the room and say hi to everybody. Firstly, because you didn’t know at least half of the persons there and did not care to meet them. Mostly, because you spent the last month ghosting the people you did know and did not want to confront them. Instead, you went straight to the wooden dining table, barely visible under all the unhealthy snacks and beverages, where Minju was seated.

“Here comes Y/N, guys”, she yelled as if you were the literal messiah, but thankfully nobody was listening, too busy getting wasted. When her eyes went from you to your guest, they doubled in size.

“So, this is the guy you were hiding all this time”, she teased, and you could see the boy’s ears turning bright red, even in this dim lighting.

“I’m Minju,” she said, holding out her hand for him to shake.

“Hyunjin” he responded with a shy smile as their palms met. Even though you wanted to strangle her for embarrassing you in front of everybody, you had to admit her antics were useful for once, since it allowed you to finally learn the stranger’s name. And what a name. You found yourself repeating it in your head again and again and again… It fit his features perfectly: soft and dreamy.

You had to snap out of it, you thought. All these feelings were so out of character. “I need a shot. Want one?” You asked Hyunjin. Before he could even answer, you were already grabbing the bottle of vodka and hastily pouring the liquor in two small glasses.

“Sure” he said as he reached for the alcohol. You clinked your glasses, looking straight into each other eyes, before downing the bitter liquid in one shot. His face contorted dramatically as soon as his lips touched the vodka, making you chuckle.

The lighthearted moment did not last long since you saw Jiwon coming in your direction. You had met him at you first Halloween college party. He was your typical frat boy, friendly and noisy, but mostly silly. To your surprise, he had taken interest in you and made his mission to transform you into an extrovert by the end of the year, which, by the way, did not happen and was not about to happen anytime soon. His intentions weren’t bad but his constant nagging about socializing only made you drift further away. And tonight, you definitely weren’t going to put up with his bullshit. When he reached the table, you avoided his gaze by reaching for the bottle once again.

“I might need another one” you muttered under your breath as you quickly poured yourself a second drink, swallowing it in a matter of second, your throat burning and chest warming up.

“Y/N! It’s been a while. Where have you been?” Jiwon asked you, putting his arm around your shoulders.

“Working” you replied curtly. The boy just laughed at your boorish behavior, used to it by now, and playfully shook your shoulder.

“We’re gonna play ‘never have I ever’. Wanna join?” he asked at your intention but also at Hyunjin’s.

“I’ll pass”, you immediately responded, not in the mood for revealing all your dirty little secrets to strangers. When were you ever in the mood, anyway?

“If you didn’t already know Hyunjin, Y/N is the definition of a party pooper”, Minju slurred as if her mouth was full of marbles. You could already predict the fact that you’ll probably spend the end of your night holding your friend’s hair while she pukes in the toilets. “But I’m sure you’re much more fun than her”.

“It’s really not that hard.” Jiwon added, a teasing smile dancing on his lips.

Hyunjin looked at you as if he was asking your permission to participate in the drinking game. You suddenly felt guilty, realizing you were probably ruining his night by acting so sour. You nodded for him to go and not to worry about you. He smiled back at you as Minju was already grabbing him by the arm to drag him to the living room. He found a seat on the rug, between two pretty girls whose names and faces you couldn’t remember.

After hesitating between staying at the dining table, moping around and binging on sour cream and onion chips, or moving closer to the group of players, you decided to come and seat on the armrest of the sofa to observe the game. Hyunjin’s nervousness seemed to lessen a bit when he saw that you were now just in front of him, only separated by the coffee table filled with glasses, and you could not help but find it adorable. His eyes left yours to find Jiwon’s as he handed him a dark green bottle of beer.

“Okay so here is the twist. We’re gonna play the other way around. I say something I have done and people who never did it must drink. That way goody two-shoes get drunk for once. I’m sure the others don’t need help to get drunk anyways”, the girl on the right of Hyunjin explained and the partygoers approved loudly.

“I’ll start slow. I have had a blackout before” she said, a smile creeping up on her mouth. Hyunjin looked around as if he was waiting for some type of signal. When he saw a few other people drinking, he took a sip of his beer.

As expected, a guy was already bickering with his friend about whether or not he could really remember the time he danced naked on the kitchen counter on New Year’s Eve. With each statement, the players became more and more tipsy, more and more loud. It would usually get on your nerves and you would go take refuge in the bathroom to ease your growing headache, but surprisingly you did not mind the noise.

Probably because all you could pay attention to at the moment was the boy in front of you. You could not help but secretly watch his every move. You hoped nobody noticed you were staring. So far, he had drunk at almost every round. Thankfully it was just beer and not another strong liquor, otherwise he would have been too far gone to even be able to get up on his feet by now.

Your mind started wandering. It was filled with questions only him could answer but that you will probably never ask. You wondered what his life was like. You had never seen someone drink this much during a “never have I ever”. Certainly because people who knew they would be drinking this much usually abstained from participating. But Hyunjin looked like he was having the time of his life losing every single round.

How come someone like him had so little experience? He did not seem like the party animal type, so you weren’t surprised when he took large gulps when a girl said she had thrown up on a friend before and when a guy stated he once fell flat on his face because of how pissed out drunk he was. But how come he never had a long-term relationship nor a one-night stand? How come he never had to hide a hickey? How come he never broke up with someone? How come he never made out in public? To say the boy was a mystery to you would have been an understatement.

His actions were getting clumsier, his laugh getting louder, his lids getting heavier, his cheeks getting redder, yet you were mesmerized. The usual aversion you’d feel towards inebriated teens had magically vanished at his captivating sight. How could someone look this beautiful, even with their guard down?

As he finished his third bottle of beer, the blonde girl on his left was already opening him another one with her lighter. You could barely hear what he was saying to her above the music and the screams, but you sensed that the alcohol was starting to become a bit too much for him as she forced the drink in his reluctant hands.

“I’ll replace Hyunjin” you said, leaping up instantly to everyone’s surprise including Hyunjin’s. He stared at you with big eyes and you suddenly felt dumb, standing here while everybody was slumped on the Persian rug.

“Here comes your knight in shining armor, Hyunjin,” Jiwon said, breaking the awkward silence by laughing loudly as if it was the highlight of his night.

“Are you scared your boyfriend is gonna get out of control, Y/N?” the blonde asked, a smirk dancing on her bright red lips. Hearing your name in her mouth came as a surprise to you since you were pretty sure you had never seen her before. But it’s not like you paid attention to drunk girls at parties. You let out a forced laugh as you got around the coffee table, trying not to crush fingers or knock over red solo cups.

“I’m just way too sober for this shitty party”, you said while you finally managed to plop down gracelessly between Hyunjin and the blonde. You addressed her your biggest, brightest, sardonic smile before you snatched the bottle she was trying so hard to give to the boy from her.

You tried to avoid Hyunjin’s gaze by staring at the round stains left on the wooden table by previous glasses, as if it was the most interesting thing you ever saw. But it was impossible to ignore his presence when your bare shoulder was flushed against his. You suddenly became so aware of how cold your skin was compared to his. You felt your heart beat in your biceps. You secretly damned the vintage muscle tee he was wearing. You would probably have found it ugly on anybody else but, oh god, did it look good on him.

You finally dared to take a look at his face, only to meet his dark hooded eyes. He was looking straight into your soul, making you feel naked, stripped down from your armor. It seemed like any kind of shyness had left him as alcohol had infiltrated his body. You could have sworn he was gradually leaning forward, getting closer to your face inch by inch, second by second. As he suddenly lost his balance, you moved just in time to avoid his head, which ended up bumping against shoulder.

“Woah, sorry” he giggled while he grabbed onto your forearm for additional support. His fingertips were burning your skin, his smile was frying bour brain.

You could see Minju smirking out of the corner of your eyes, making you instantly get a hold on yourself. There was no way you would give your friend the satisfaction of seeing you flustered because of a boy.

“My turn,” you said, after clearing your throat. “I have gone skinny dipping before.”

-----

Hyunjin could not tell how much time had passed until he finally realized you had disappeared when he felt like he was on fire. Your coldness was gone and the little voice inside his head was urging him to go find it again.

He got up, his legs wobbly as if he was walking with high heels on quicksands, and wandered down the corridor. The alcohol had his head buzzing. He could not trust his senses anymore, his eyes were playing games, twisting and blurring his surroundings. Thankfully, there were no countless doors leading to dark rooms filled with strangers making out. Just your usual messy bedrooms and small bathroom, making it a lot easier to find you.

When he turned the silver knob of the second door, he was immediately warned by the scent of burnt tobacco. He could make out your figure, standing on the small balcony. Your features were lit by the moonlight. The smoke coming from your cigarette was creating shadows on your face and the fresh wind was blowing in your untamed baby hair. For the first time you looked soft, almost fragile.

You only seemed to notice his presence when he tripped on the windowsill, making a blaring noise that echoed into the empty street. Even though he was drunk, he could still see you were repressing a laugh.

“You look like you’re having fun” you said, backing onto the balustrade and crossing your arms over your chest, your halfway smoked cigarette stuck between your index and middle fingers.

“Yeah. Thanks for bringing me” he responded, climbing onto the bar of the balustrade like a kid would do to be able to look outside despite his small height. He did not know he had vertigo until he looked down the 5 stories. You grabbed him by the arm, pulling him back to the ground as his head was spinning.

He stole your cigarette and brought it to his lips to take a drag. He immediately regretted his decision when the smoke burnt his esophagus, making him almost choke. He gave it back to you with a sheepish smile. But you seemed amused by his childish antics.

“My friends seem to like you a lot”, you said, ignoring his embarrassing attempt at acting like a bad boy. “I’d say even more than they like me”.

“No, they don’t” he snorted.

“Yes, they do” you chuckled. You took a long drag of your cigarette as you turned around to look at the moon. A cloud of smoke escaped your lips and nostrils, tingling Hyunjin’s unaccustomed nose. “But don’t worry. That was the reaction I was hoping for when I invited you.”

Hyunjin’s eyebrows furrowed. He could not quite comprehend what you were meaning by that and the alcohol flowing through his veins was probably not helping.

“I knew they would pay attention to you and not me. It’s a win-win situation. You’re having a great time and they’re leaving me in peace for once. I don’t think I would have been able to put up with another ‘why are you so quiet’ or ‘smile a little more’ comment”, you explained, addressing him a small smile. He noticed you were trying hard to hide a certain form a sadness, but it shone through your steel mask anyways. He could see it in the way your eyes would linger for too long on the accumulated ashes and your breath would shake.

“You really hate them, huh?” He realized his question was gauche a second too late. A silence settled in between the two of you, only disrupted by the sound of the wind blowing in the trees. The moon was almost full and there was no cloud in the navy sky to soften the light it shone on you.

“I don’t hate them. I hate the way they make me feel”, you finally admitted as if you were dying to say those words out loud for so long.

“How do they make you feel?” Hyunjin inquired hesitantly.

“Like I’m out of place” you said. “Have you ever felt lonely in a room full of people? I feel that way each time I show up to those parties. That is why I stopped coming. The worst thing is my friends try so hard to make me feel like I belong here, to the point that it becomes annoying. They keep on inviting me and dragging me everywhere they go. Yet, it doesn’t work.” You sighed heavily and flicked the ash at the tip of your cigarette. “The problem is not them. It’s me”, you muttered to yourself, but Hyunjin could hear the pain in your voice.

“And how do I make you feel?” He dared to ask, preparing himself to have his feelings hurt.

“Honestly? Jealous. I wonder how you do… this,” you said, waving your hand in his face.

“What is “this”?” he giggled.

“Being so charming.” You looked at your shoes, your cheeks flushing red as if complimenting him was the most embarrassing thing you had ever done. He could not help but find your behavior endearing. A teasing smile was painted on Hyunjin’s face, making you roll your eyes. He bumped your shoulder with his to get a laugh from you. He felt relieved to see you finally smile.

“You’re gonna probably roll your eyes at what I’m gonna say but there aren’t only good sides to being well-liked” he started hesitantly.

Your reaction pushed him to continue. It looked like he had all your attention, like you were genuinely interested in knowing how he felt. It had always been hard for him to talk about it, even with his members since he didn’t want to be an additional burden. But he found a sense of comfort in telling an almost total stranger. If truth be told, he felt like he could tell you everything at this exact moment.

“I’m always wondering if the person they like is the real me or the front I’m trying to put up every single day. I’m scared they’ll find out who I really am and get bored of me. Or even worst, disgusted by me”. He was so used to hiding every single one of his flaws. A perfect man, that is what he was always asked to be. Perfect skin, perfect hair, perfect outfit, perfect personality, perfect performance. He was taught the smallest misdemeanor would lead not only to his downfall, but his friends’ too. What a heavy burden to carry when you’re still just a lost and confused teenager. “I feel like an impostor.” His members probably felt the same way sometimes, but it was obsessing him. He couldn’t count the number of nights he stayed awake wondering if he really earned his place by working himself into the ground or if was just lucky to be born with a pretty face.

“Then who’s the real you?” you asked quietly. Your eyes were shining in the dark, your long lashes surrounding them like the petals of two rare flowers. He felt like he could dive into them, get lost in the abyss and never come back up to the surface, as if he would find the answer to your question there. For a minute, it seemed like he forgot how to breathe, how to think. He finally came back to his senses when you stubbed out your cigarette, breaking the entrancing contact between the two of you.

“An insecure and sensitive drama queen”, he said with a fake solemn tone like a spy revealing his real identity.

“I would love to get to know her somedays” you joked, grinning from ear to ear. How badly he wanted to pinch your pink cheeks right now, to squeeze you so tight you’d pop in his arms.

“How about tonight?”

You spent the next few hours on the small balcony discussing your everyday lives, sharing your guiltiest pleasures, revealing your darkest secrets, keeping each other warm by huddling up. He discovered you were polar opposites. You despised coffee while he would kill for a good iced Americano. Hyunjin enjoyed listening to hip-hop, you preferred rock. You liked old black and white movies while he’d never say no to go see the new marvel one in theaters. He’d always pick sweet raspberry over any other flavor, but you’d choose bitter lemon. You strived at night, when no one was watching, whereas he lived under the constant spotlight, scrutinized by strangers. He felt like the sun and you looked like the moon. He was the summer, warm and welcoming, and you were the winter, cold and impenetrable. You were so far away from each other, worlds apart. Yet, never had he felt this close to someone before. In your presence, he felt at home.

The creaking sound of the door opening interrupted your conversation. “Guys, Yerin is kicking everybody out” Jiwon said. Minju, trying hard to keep her eyes open but loosing miserably against the alcohol and the sleepiness, was gripping the boy’s shoulder tightly, using him as a crutch.

“What time is it?” you asked, getting back inside the bedroom. Hyunjin followed reluctantly. Never had he hated someone more than Jiwon right now for putting an end to such a magical moment. He had to fight the urge to scream at the intruders to go away and leave the two of you alone. But it was too late, the atmosphere had already shifted, and you were back to the usual detached attitude you displayed in public.

“It’s already 3 am. I’m taking Minju back to her place” he answered. You thanked him, obviously relieved not to be the one in charge of taking care of your drunk best friend.

When your group arrived in the living room, Hyunjin saw a girl who was trying to clean up the mess the guests made. He would have offered his help if he had not seen that you were already out of the door, waiting for him. Jiwon and Minju left immediately in a yellow cab that was waiting for them.

Once again, you and Hyunjin were alone, surrounded by the silence of the dark night.

“I don’t wanna go home yet”, he whispered to himself, as he watched the few stars the polluted air of the city allowed him to see, his back pressed against the concrete wall of the building.

“Me neither”, you admitted. His heart jumped in his chest at the thought that you wanted to spend more time with him. His eyes dared to find yours. They were sparkling in excitement. A few hours ago, never he would have hoped to see you react in such a way. Only him seemed to be allowed to see this facet of yours. You made him feel so special.

“Let’s go somewhere else” he said.

“Where?”

That was a good question. Where do teenagers go in the middle of the night if it isn’t to a house party? “I’ve never been to a club before”, he suggested after racking his still foggy brain.

“Let’s make this night a night of firsts then”. Your cold fingers intertwined with his, sending shivers down his spine, as you dragged him in the alley lit by rusty streetlamps.

The night was young and so were the both of you.

-----

You couldn’t fathom how the fuck you ended up in a dingy night club at 3:30 AM, the place you despised the most on earth, right after public toilets and hospitals. Yesterday, a check to your name with at least two zeros would have been necessary to convince you to join the wasted partiers. Today, a sweet smile and a couple more shots of vodka had been more than enough. The effect the boy you met just a few weeks ago had on you was much more important than you would have liked to admit. How far were you capable to go for him if he asked you to? There was something scary about this intense sentiment you never felt before.

Hyunjin had you dancing in the middle of a crowd of total strangers as if nobody was watching. You, the person who was self-aware of every single one of her moves, constantly imagining how she looked in the eyes of the people surrounding her. For the first time, you let yourself truly exhale. You didn’t realize how long you had been holding your breath for.

Your intoxicated blood was pumping in your veins to the rhythm of the music blasting in your ears. Your limbs were moving as they wished, as if they had a mind of their own. The ground, sticky after all the drinks that were spilled on it, seemed to be rippling under your feet. Your whole world was tilting to the right, and then to the left, like a seesaw. Each flash of light felt like an additional shot of adrenaline. Your head was spinning and your vision getting hazier by the minute, making your eyes unable to distinguish the mass of sweaty bodies in the dark. But no matter how dizzy you were, you could still see him clearly.

Like Sirius, the brightest star in the night sky, Hyunjin shone. In a tide of people, you only had eyes for him. His body was moving in the most entrancing way, swinging so effortlessly to the beat of early 2010 hits. You couldn’t help but stare at his glistening neck, his collar bones left uncovered by his white muscle tee, his defined biceps, his swaying hips. Every inch of him seemed to be the work of Apollon.

You knew people were admiring him but you did not care. How could you be mad at them for taking a glimpse of such a beautiful sight? Especially when his eyes were never leaving yours, making you wonder what you did in your past life to deserve even a second of his attention.

You did not know how many hours went by, watching him recreating the most ridiculous dance steps he could remember to make you giggle and listening to him butchering your favorite childhood songs. At some point, you joined him. You screamed at the top of your lungs approximative lyrics that faded into uncontrollable bursts of laugher as he would catch you in his arms, make you twirl around and lift you in the air.

As people were slowly leaving the club, you were coming down from your high. Hyunjin was holding you tighter and tighter, your chest crushed against his, not even an inch separating your bodies, as if he was scared you might vanish if he loosened up his embrace even just a little. You never were the affectionate type, too afraid getting closer to someone would only scare them away. Because this is how you’d normally react yourself. The proximity was terrifying, the intimacy even more. But being in Hyunjin’s arms just felt so right at this moment.

Suddenly, the music seemed to come from another room, so far away, muffled as if your head was underwater. You dared to remove your face from the crook of his neck. You were relieved when you saw his face. Relieved this was not just a dream, this was your present. You were both gasping for air, inhaling and exhaling at the same tempo.

Your fingertips found his right cheek, then grazed his cupid’s bow and finally touched his lower lip. They felt too rough against his plump mouth. No matter how hard you’d try, you would never be gentle enough for such delicate features, for such a pure soul, you thought. You would ruin him, destroy him, tear his heart apart. But then his hand wrapped around yours. He made you press your palm against his burning skin.

His deep brown eyes were screaming ‘You’re enough’. And for once you believed it.

-----

“There is one more thing I want to do tonight” Hyunjin told you.

The fresh breeze had replaced the smell of sweat and alcohol and all kinds of filthy things, as you exited the night club. The dew was already glistening on the blades of grass of the neighboring lawns, like thousands of diamonds. The dark sky, blurred by the morning mist, was just starting to lighten, turning shades of lilac and mauve. The sunrise would be soon, but the streetlights were still on, leading the way. The teenagers that were kicked out of the club looked lost and disoriented as if they had just regained consciousness after an endless dream, stumbling in the city streets at 6 in the morning on a Sunday.

Your makeup was smudged under your eyes, accentuating the dark shadows due to the lack of sleep. Your hair was a mess and your cheekbones red. Yet, the way you were looking at him, eyes sparkling with curiosity, made you look adorable.

“Which way is the ocean?” he asked you.

You cocked your eyebrow in confusion but pointed your thumb to your right anyways, giving up on guessing what he had in mind. He grabbed your hand, his fingers naturally intertwining with yours, and started to run in the direction you indicated, slaloming between the hangover teens.

Not once had he gone to see the ocean since he had arrived here. The loneliness had paralyzed him all this time. But now that you were by his sides, he had the strong urge to feel the sea spray on his face, the sand between his toes. To feel alive after all these days of numbness. And share this feeling with you.

He had to drag you for a few meters before you finally picked up the pace. The further you got away from the night club, the more the streets were deserted, the only living presences you encountered at this hour being stray cats searching for something to eat in the dumpsters.

“Wait” you faintly protested as you were already gasping for air after a few minutes of running.

“We have to hurry before the sun comes up” he told you, holding your hand a little tighter to give you some courage.

-----

When your Doc Martens finally sunk in the humid sand, your lungs were on fire and your heart was about to burst out of your ribcage. The slender boy did not let you catch your breath though. As you were bent in two, hands resting on your weakened knees and chest heaving, you saw Hyunjin taking off his shirt and his muscle tee out of the corner of your eye.

Taken aback by his sudden boldness, you stood back up abruptly. The way Hyunjin smirked at you made you realize you were staring a bit too obviously at his defined torso. You felt your face becoming even hotter when he pulled down his jean shorts. Once he threw his beat-up converse in the sand, only his blue boxers were left. Never in your life a boy’s behavior had made you this flustered.

As your brain was trying to register what was happening, your started to stutter foolishly. But Hyunjin did not leave you the time to ask what the hell he was doing, already sprinting to the ocean. In an instant, the crashing waves swallowed him whole. You tried to catch a glimpse of him, but the foam formed by the sea’s eddies were making it impossible for you to distinguish his figure.

You did not know what took over you, probably the same unknown feeling that pushed you to dance in a filthy club, but here you were undressing hastily on a deserted beach at dawn. You ignored the shivers that traveled down your spine and the goosebumps that were appearing on your legs as you took off your shorts. You kept your large t-shirt on, not brave enough to show your whole body to him. You knew your courage would falter if you took too long to enter the cold water, so you ran and dove, headfirst.

The water felt like liquid ice against your skin, wrapping every inch of you, hugging you dearly. Your whole body went numb. If it wasn’t your stinging cuticles that were raw from the constant biting of your nails, you would have forgotten you were even made out of flesh. Forgotten that your existence did not just consist of a tired soul floating around aimlessly in the limbo. At last, everything felt so serene and at peace.

Ever since you learned how to swim, you had always loved the ocean. The feeling it procured you was still unrivaled to this day. It was better than alcohol, better than drugs, better than sex. Underwater, everything would stop for a moment. Your heartbeat would start to slow down, to the point you weren’t sure you were still alive. Your eyes would cease to see, and your ears would cease to hear. The whole world would go quiet. Those minutes of nothingness were all you wished for. They left you craving for more. But as the years went by, the beach wasn’t the refuge it used to be anymore. It slowly became a place of deep insecurities and social obligations. You stopped going, always declining your friends’ invitations. Only now were you realizing how much you missed the ocean’s embrace.

When your lungs screamed in need of oxygen, you reluctantly swam back to the surface. The void the water left in your heart was immediately filled by Hyunjin’s smile.

“You’re crazy” you told him between two waves, your hands flailing around to keep your head over the troubled water. He beamed at you and you thought you could die happy right now, with the picture of his radiant face in mind.

You both let yourselves float on your backs, the water gently rocking you. The sun was peeking shyly on the horizon, like the flame of an old lighter, gradually turning the shades of blue and mauve into hues of orange and pink. You noticed the faint shadow of the moon, not wanting to leave just yet. Ribbons of golden clouds were now decorating the pale sky. The sea was no longer an abyss of dark blue, but now an infinite expanse of liquid gold, as the sun rays were dancing over its surface.

You were overwhelmed by such beauty, on the verge of tears. You weren’t sure if you had actually started crying or if your cheeks were just wet because of the ocean’s water. The memory of the last last time you watched the sunrise by the sea with your family came back. Your parents were still together at that time and your brother hadn’t left town to go study far away yet. Everything was so simple back then. You used to be so happy, so carefree, so eager. You thought you would never be able to feel this way ever again. You thought the best moments of your life were already behind you.

But Hyunjin proved you wrong. For the first time in years, you didn’t regret yesterday nor fear tomorrow. You didn’t think about the stupid shit you did at a party last year nor what you were going to do with your boring degree once you graduated. You didn’t wish time away, finally savoring the moment. You felt so alive by his side.

You didn’t know how long you were floating, watching silently the sky changing colors. Minutes, hours, months, years, an eternity had passed. When you finally got back on your feet, your fingers were all pruned. As you were about to get out of the water, Hyunjin grabbed your wrist. “There’s one last thing I want to do tonight” he told you.

“It’s not nighttime anymore,” you teased him.

But Hyunjin did not seem to be in the mood to joke around. The way he was staring at you so intensely made your chest ache in apprehension. He pulled gently on your wrist to bring you closer. So close you were able to see the droplets of water that clung onto his long eyelashes. The sunrise had turned his deep brown eyes into cognac-colored ones, shades of orange and amber tinting his irises. His tan skin was glowing, and you couldn’t help but wonder if he was really a human or an otherworldly creature. Your breath hitched in your throat that had suddenly gone dry.

“Alright,” you said, in a voice that was quieter than you expected. You cleared your throat, trying to regain your composure. “But I swear to god, Hyunjin, if you ask me to jump off a cliff I - “

You were cut off by his plump lips, pressing softly against yours. Hyunjin kissed you tenderly, carefully, as if you were made of crystal. He tasted like salt and vodka, like holidays and sunshine. At this moment, you felt whole, complete. But he pulled away only seconds after, much to your dismay. His expectant eyes found yours. He seemed to be waiting for a response that would hopefully calm his nerves.

You wanted to scream ‘what were you waiting for all this time?’ but instead you just kissed him back, craving the feeling of his mouth on yours so badly. Your hands trailed up his shoulder and cupped his cheeks. The kiss grew more intense as his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you harder against his damp skin. Heat bloomed in the pit of your stomach, spreading ineluctably to the rest of your body. Hyunjin’s prior hesitation was long gone. His lips moved urgently, kissing you so hard you would have probably lost your balance if he wasn’t holding you this tight.

Your fingers pulled on his hair tie to free his bleached strands. You were finally able to run your fingers through his wet hair. You had been dying to do so all evening. You couldn’t help but tug slightly at the rough ends. You thought your heartbeat couldn’t get any faster until a soft moan escaped his lips, sending you over the edge.

Your head was spinning endlessly. Your mind was monopolized by the thought of him. Every bit of your sanity was out the window. You loved his blond hair that was a little too long. You cherished his delicate nose. You adored his full lips. You treasured the beauty mark under his eye. You worshipped his whole being.

When it all became too much for your body to handle, you reluctantly broke the kiss. You were both panting, breathing the same air as his forehead stayed pressed against yours. His thumb was rubbing slowly against your jaw and you couldn’t help but lean into his soothing touch. He looked so glorious, his eyes half-closed, and his lips swollen, that if you had listened to the mischievous voice in your head you would have devoured him at that very moment. But Hyunjin noticed the goosebumps that had spread across your arms and the way you were shivering. He finally became aware of the freezing waves that kept crashing against your thighs.

“We should go dry off before we catch a cold” he said to you with the sweetest smile, before leading you out of the water, his hand never leaving yours.

Just now did you realize how bad of an idea it had been to swim with your shirt still on. It was clinging onto every inch of your body, the salt making it even more uncomfortable. There was no way it would be dry before several hours, especially with the sun this low on the horizon. Once Hyunjin reached the pile of clothes you left on the sand, he handed you his linen shirt awkwardly and turned around to let you change. You couldn’t help but giggle at his adorable gesture.

You made sure nobody was watching, undressed as quickly as your sticky t-shirt allowed you to and put his shirt on. It was soft against your skin and smelled like his cologne. Hyunjin had taken the opportunity of you turning your back on him to put his tee and shorts back on. You laughed when you realized that he went commando, his dripping boxers still in his hand.

He tried to distract you from his blushing face by letting himself fall to the ground. You joined him, with a loud sigh, stretching you out on the golden sand that had just started to warm up. It was the first time in 24 hours that you were lying down but your eyes wouldn’t close.

“I can’t believe you never asked what my name was and just waited around to know it” Hyunjin laughed, interrupting your daydream.

You rolled on your stomach and leaned on your elbow so that you could look at him. “You didn’t ask what mine was either!” you exclaimed, on the defensive. But his infectious laugh only ringed louder in your ears. “I was stressed out, okay?” you pouted.

“Did I make you flustered?” he smirked.

“Of course, you did!” you said like he had stated the obvious. “It’s not that often that a cute boy comes to the store every single day to buy freaking raspberry popsicles…”

“Maybe I didn’t only come to buy popsicles.”

“Oh really? I would have never thought,” you said ironically.

“Not gonna lie, I was kind of shocked that you finally talked to me” he said while his fingers tucked a piece of hair that was falling over your face behind your ear lovingly.

“Was I that scary?”

“Terrifying” he joked. You rolled your eyes and put his arm around you so that you could rest your head on his chest.

“Okay let’s start all over. Hi, my name is Y/N.” you said sticking out your hand for him to shake.

“Nice to meet you Y/N. My name is Hyunjin. Can we make out now?” he giggled, and you couldn’t help but hit him playfully.

You both grew silent as you admired the sky changing color. You snuggled your face in the crook of his neck, looking for his warmth. You wondered how he was always so warm, how he felt like pure sunshine. You thought you could spend your whole life here, just the two of you, laying on a beach at dawn, listening to his steady heartbeat, him playing with your wet hair. You would have wanted to catch this feeling in a bottle: happiness.

“Summer breaks aren’t so bad after all,” he whispered.

-----

Hyunjin’s shoulder had gone numb a long time ago but he didn’t dare to move, not wanting to disturb such a peaceful sight. You were sleeping, your mouth slightly agape, air coming in and out of it steadily. But when he felt like he would have to be amputated if he stayed like this one more second, he scooped up your head gently to put it on the sand. Unfortunately, your puffy eyes opened as soon as his skin wasn’t in contact with yours anymore, as if your body couldn’t bear to be separated from his.

“What time is it?” you asked groggily, trying to cover your face from the sun that was already a lot higher in the blue sky.

He took his phone out of his pocket, careful not to put any sand on it. “8:47” he said.

“I really gotta go”, you sighed. But you didn’t get up.

You looked so comfortable, laying there, hugged by the warm sand. Your whole body, which used to look lifeless, was now bathing in sunlight. White linen had never looked this good, he thought. The way his shirt was draping over your figure mesmerized him. Your delicate collarbones were peeking right above the collar. He noticed every freckle on your face, every mole on your body, every stretchmark on your hips, every hair on your arms and legs. He loved all of it. He had to repress the urge to caress your skin, too scared he might go crazy if he did.

You finally decided to move, much to Hyunjin’s dismay. You emptied your boots of all the sand that had found its way in them before putting them back on. Hyunjin had never seen someone struggle this much to tie up their laces before. You both managed to stand up, despite the exhaustion and the soreness.

“And I really need some Advil” you said, wincing in pain once you were on your feet. Your head must have been pounding, just like his, after this long night of partying.

“Piggyback ride?” he offered, and you smiled. He collected all your clothes before he let you jump onto his back. You had a hard time doing it, having no strength left in your legs, but after a few attempts and a fit of laughter, Hyunjin managed to hook his arms under your thighs. He took one last look at the turbulent ocean, in order to imprint this moment in his memory, before returning to the streets.

You acted like a GPS, indicating him the fastest way to get to the closest subway station. He had never seen a GPS be this confused though: you were changing your itinerary every two seconds and he was starting to wonder if you really knew were you were going. But the ways your arms were wrapped around his shoulders, your breath was caressing his cheeks and your hair was tickling his neck were totally making up for how exhausted he felt from carrying you for so long.

Once you finally reached the subway entrance after this long journey, he let you get down. Your hurtled down the stairs as you heard the loud screeching of the train getting closer.

As expected on a Sunday morning, the car was almost empty, so you easily found two seats. You let your head fall onto Hyunjin shoulder.

He couldn’t help but think about your previous ride. About how different it felt. About how world-weary you used to seem as you were staring out the window. It had only happened 12 hours earlier, but it seemed like eternity had passed since.

Sure, you still looked tired. But it was now a different kind of tiredness. The one that inevitably came after the excitement. The one you were trying so hard to fight not to miss any second of what the universe had planned for you. The one that was making you grin from ear to ear even though your eyelids were getting heavier. The one that meant you were still alive.

“I think this is my station,” you suddenly told him, interrupting his sweet reverie.

You got up in a hurry and as your body got away from his, Hyunjin felt like someone had ripped off a part of him. You grabbed your still dripping shirt with the tips of your fingers. You stood up before him for a second, your expression unreadable, before making your way to the already opening doors.

But just before you reached them, you stopped dead in your tracks as if you had forgotten something. You walked back to Hyunjin and leaned in to press a chaste kiss on his lips. A goodbye kiss that tasted so sweet. Your hand caressed his jaw soflty and he couldn’t help but notice how your skin was a little warmer than the usual.

The beeping of the doors startled the both of you. You rushed out just in time, giggling like a child. His heart broke a little when the doors closed behind you. You stayed on the platform while the train was leaving, waving your hand at Hyunjin. You looked like an angel in his white shirt that was fluttering in the wind, grinning candidly from ear to ear.

He did not know then it would be the last time he saw you.

You didn’t come to work on Monday and Hyunjin left for Seoul on Tuesday.

He didn’t know your number nor your address.

He didn’t even know your last name.

All the sudden, it seemed like you never existed. All he had left was the memory of you and surely this memory, one day, will become so old that Hyunjin himself will doubt of its reality, without any other witness to confirm it. He will probably think you were a creation of his lonely mind, a dream, a mirage.

Who will even believe him when he would tell his first love story?

But there was one thing he was sure of. He will never forget the look on your face.

Never forget how you finally seemed happy.

#stray kids #stray kids scenarios #stray kids fic #stray kids fluff #hyunjin fic #hyunjin fluff #stray kids imagines #hwang hyunjin #stray kids au #hyunjin au #stray kids fanfic #hyunjin fanfic #hyunjin scenario #kpop fanfic #i have literally no idea how youre supposed to tag your fics help

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sweets-r-cool · 4 years

Text

Sleepless pt. 2 (Bakugo x reader)

So- it seemed like everyone rlly liked part one- so thank you for that... anyways- I hope this lives up to your expectations but idk just

Part one

One week. One whole ass week of (7) full days.

That was the amount of time you spent ignoring- completely avoiding- Bakugo Katsuki.

According to him, you were a dumbass. However, you weren’t so stupid as to the fact the last comment he made before he left the gym that night (morning?) was basically a weird, sort of twisted not really but also really a confession.

The girl he was talking about was apparently a dumbass, you were his dumbass. Your face flushed at the thought.

You kind of hated that it did though. Considering, believing you were the girl he liked also meant admitting you were a dumbass. You kind of were- but that didn’t mean you were willing to acknowledge it.

That was irrelevant.

Bakugo Katsuki liked you. The angry hedgehog of Class 1-A, who called anyone he didn’t call an insulting nickname an extra, had feelings for you. It was kind of weird. Such an angry existence feeling more than the willingness to deal with you. It made you nauseous, but in the excited sort of way. As well as the super embarrassed sort of way.

Hence why you literally ran an extra lap in training when you noticed the ash blond boy walking over to you. You literally ran away from him. You didn’t even like running.

It was also why you were currently in the same gym room the whole situation rooted from. Pounding your fists against the very same punching bag Bakugo had been that night.

At this rate, it would be like a reverse deja vu situation. It was currently 3:18 AM. Also, you were already in the gym; however, you really hoped it wouldn’t actually be reverse deja vu, because that would mean Bakugo would come to you, and as mentioned before, you were avoiding him.

You didn’t really have a good reason for avoiding him. It was just sort one of those situations you didn’t want to be awkward, but the problem is you knew you’d make it awkward somehow. You and your high on sleep deprivation mind.

You were still unable to sleep,and it was still because of Bakugo.

Only now, it was because you couldn’t help the giddy feeling in your heart, stomach, cheeks, and overall existence. It made you roll around in bed smiling and kicking your legs until the adrenaline wore off or until you simply fell off your bed with a squawk from your mouth and a thud from your body, earning an “Are u okay?” text from whoever heard your antics.

You eventually took a small break from punching your feelings away to drink some water. When you did, your phone buzzed with a notification from Instagram.

That was odd. Kirishima wasn’t usually awake at this time.

You gulped, praying to whatever deity up there that Bakugo wouldn’t be able to guess your whereabouts.

You were glad Kirishima had your back. Even if it did sort of intervene in his role as wing man, you didn’t feel like talking to Bakugo yet. Kirishima was a real one. You’d probably just find a way to yeet yourself into oblivion before that. Even if that wasn’t a very realistic choice.

You stretched your back and yawned. You should be asleep by now, but whatever. Bakugo and Kirishima were awake for what ever reason, though Kirishima seemed like he was woken up by Bakugo. In his words, most likely a ‘so not manly’ move on Bakugo’s part. If a bro is able to enjoy sleep, you should let them. Then again, suffering with sleep deprivation together was always fun.

You picked up your stuff, deciding that should be it for tonight. You were kind of sore already from earlier today’s training and so adding anymore than this would only make you more sore, which wasn’t ideal.

You walked to the door, casually swinging it open.

You nearly ran into someone’s chest due to the fact it was clad in a black tanktop which almost blended in with the darkness of the hallway. Luckily, you caught sight of the fair skin attached to the ash blond locks...

What-

Suddenly you felt the color leave your face as your eyes met with deep crimson ones, piercing in the best way possible as always.

Within what felt like the millisecond, your hand reached for the door knob, pulling it towards you with the purpose of slamming it. Only when Bakugo caught hold of it, successfully stopping you, did you decide this was the end.

You turned around, maybe you could get in a few more good punches to that poor punching bag before you died of embarrassment. You felt a cold sweat replace the natural one, caused by working out and not your emotional state.

How could Kirishima betray you?!

You pulled out your phone.

Maybe you should tattoo ‘Lysol’ on his forehead instead of Kaminari’s, because that was what he deserved like the bacteria he was. Friendship was fragile as glass, there was no coming back from this for him. He probably just told Bakugo so he could go back to sleep without having to deal with your bullshit. Kirishima was fake. So fake.

That sucked for Kirishima, because now you were going to make sure he felt your pain.

You meant it. You were coming for his kneecaps-

“Hey, Dumbass,” Bakugo’s raspy voice stopped you in your tracks as he walked through the doorway. You turned around with a sheepish frown, “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?”

You breathed out harshly, “Narnia?” That worked. In your brain, of course. You were gonna die. Good going, you.

Bakugo deadpanned at your idiotic answer. His look read, “What the fuck?”

You really couldn’t blame him.

Where was the portal to the void when you needed it?

You straightened, opting to find a way out of this. “Ya’ know what, Bakugo? I just realized, Narnia is that way, since- ya’know, there aren’t any closets here for me to hide in. I mean,” you cleared you throat, “use as a portal.”

You began to swiftly walk with purpose. Purpose to escape and avoid this awkward interaction. You barely made passed him, the door was so close when he grabbed your wrist, not intending to let go.

You head snapped to his gaze, then down to your wrist and his hand. You laughed, the panic underlying in it clear. “Hey, Bakugo. Just thought I’d let you know, I spilled dumb bitch juice all over me, so you might wanna let go before it spreads-”

“Shut the fuck up and talk to me,” Bakugo asserted.

You sighed, standing up normally instead of the previous ready-to-run pose you were in just the second before. “T-talk about what,” you asked coyly.

You could practically see the angry tics for on Bakugo’s temple as his eyebrow twitched. At the same time, his face was dusted with a light blush, which only got your face to turn a deeper, much darker red. Bakugo cupped your cheeks, you flinched and your heart started beating faster.

However, you felt slightly relaxed and also disappointed when all he did was squeeze your cheeks together. Though it hurt a little, it was something your poor heart could take at the moment.

“You fucking- You fucking know what I’m saying, Dumbass,” he said as you managed to pry his hands off your cheeks.

You sighed, turning away, embarrassed still. “Yeah,” you began to pout, “but what kind of sort-of but not really confession was that, you asshole?!”

Now wasn’t the time for you to get mad, but you couldn’t tell if it was because of how late (early?) it was or if it was because you weren’t used to talking about love or things like that. It was probably the latter, considering the only other person aside from you who knew about your crush on Bakugo was Kirishima and Kirishima alone.

It was whatever, you already got mad, there was no going back.

Bakugo looked confused for once as you turned back around with an expression on your face he’d never seen before. Were you... flustered?

“Don’t look at me like that! I like you, Mr.I’m-good-at-everything-but-confessions! I like you, you asshole, and if your gonna confess do it better,” you crossed your arms, fuming in a more joking way, but your face really was red and no amount of pretending it wasn’t would change that. “So yeah, I like you... now what?”

You couldn’t keep your lips in a frown for much longer as you found your lips curling upwards instead. Bakugo took a few steps towards you, his chest only inches from your own.

You had to look up at him, due to your height difference, but that wasn’t what you cared about.

Bakugo scoffed, his eyes not leaving yours. Bakugo wasn’t even sure it was possible to pry his eyes from your captivating e/c, not right now at least. “I like you,” he smirked, watching your face deteriorate back into it’s flustered expression, “is that better?”

You huffed, “Much-” you were cut off when Bakugo pushed his lips against yours. Your eyes widened before fluttering closed as you melted into the kiss.

It was fiery, just like Bakugo himself. It was hard not to smile. The kiss was also sort of needy, maybe it was because you ignored the explosive blond for a whole week, or maybe it was because of how long you liked each other without acting on it.

It wasn’t something you cared to know the answer of.

There was also one more thing.

You couldn’t tell if you cared or not anymore, but the back of your mind screamed you would still not be able to sleep, too happy to. All because of this dumb hoe, Bakugo Katsuki. It was fine, because now he was your dumb hoe.

~ extra ~

“Sleep deprived as always, eh, Y/n?” Kirishima nudged your elbow, both in a friendly way and to keep you awake.

“Watch your back, Kiri, if you want to keep your knee caps...” you trailed off, glaring daggers into him.

“What?! Didn’t things go well?!” the redhead exclaimed, panicked.

“Yes. They did, but still. >:(”

~~~~

it’s currently 2:21 am for me rn lmao

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mikwrites-archive · 4 years

Text

synopsis: oikawa tooru is a hitman, tasked with a job of killing you, another hitman. he fails spectacularly.

pairing: oikawa tooru x fem!reader

warnings: guns and one swear

masterlist: in the works!

a/n: im rlly excited for this au !!! i hope u guys like it and that oiks here isn’t outshined by the villain AHAHAHA i also have a bokuto villain hitman au in the works too but it’s not connected to this hehe !!

The small cafe was bustling with the sound of newspapers being fluttered, old porcelain mugs rattling, and the chatter of morning risers.

Sunlight was streaming into the large windows of the cafe, partially filtered by opaque satiny curtains and abundant ferns that were situated along the sills.

At a table for two, in the area with most golden light, sat a young man, alone, studiously going over the menu.

Tooru Oikawa. The Great King. Infamous hitman.

Not that anyone within the cafe knew, of course.

He had been sitting there since the small establishment opened, only having ordered a coffee which he’d barely touched, but no one paid him much attention or suspicion any longer, for this has been his routine for the past five days.

Today, however, was different.

An hour into sitting at the small rickety table, warmed by sunshine, Tooru Oikawa slipped away, the only trail being a crumpled bill and a few scattered coins.

He blends in with the other city goers, the sidewalks considerably busier as the morning hastened by, eyes trained upon the red scarf that fluttered as the wearer walked briskly, disappearing suddenly past a corner.

Oikawa curses, speeding up, apologizing as he bumps into several citizens, skidding around the corner, only to have the breath knocked out as him as he’s rammed against the alleyway wall.

The cold metal of the gun barrel is shoved almost painfully under his chin, and Oikawa grunts, stilling in his scramble for his own weapon.

Shit.

“I’ve got to say, I’m a bit disappointed.” You drawl, the slow click of cocking the gun emphasizing your words. “This is the Great King?”

Your face is partially concealed by the red scarf that he had targeted you with, yet Oikawa can feel the coolness radiating off of you.

“So you know me, huh?” Oikawa wheezes, mind racing in his attempt to stall for time to decide his next action. “Kind of a weird way of asking for an autograph.”

“Of course I do. I’ve heard all about your stupid hits and I’m honestly surprised you haven’t had your head blown off yet.” You smile under the scarf, and your eyes glitter threateningly. “I’ll take care of that for you real soon though, don’t worry.”

“Wait.” Oikawa blurt, before he even realizes what he’s going to say next, all he knows is that Iwaizumi is gonna be pissed if he’s dead, and it’s honestly too early for his life to end. “Are you sure you can kill such a pretty face?”

“I’ve killed prettier.” You dismiss, finger pressing against the trigger, and Oikawa inhales sharply.

He knew that. You were also a hitman. The first one of his own profession he’s killed. Or at least, was supposed to.

“Okay, seriously, hold on. The people who sent a hit out on you.” Oikawa stammers, and surprisingly, you pause. He was grasping at straws, doubtful that you’d even be curious at who tasked him with this job, but your interest is piqued, and he was running with it.

“They offered me a crazy amount of money. Like insane. I was told by everyone to reject it because it seemed like a scam, but-”

“Get to the point.” You snap, and Oikawa trips over his tongue. “Who sent it?”

“Shiratorizawa.” He yelps as you apply more pressure with the barrel. “Ushijima Wakatoshi.”

Oikawa gasps as the weight on his throat is relieved, gaze flashing up to your widened eyes, able to catch the shock in your features despite being mainly concealed. He’s about to move, before your arm rears up, and comes plummeting down.

Darkness.

#oikawa x reader #tooru oikawa x reader #tooru oikawa imagine #oikawa imagine #oikawa tooru imagine #oikawa tooru x reader #hitman au #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! imagine #haikyuu!! imagines #haikyuu!! x reader #fatale au

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loverofallthingssmart · 3 years

Note

hii bestie <333 can i have bookrecs maybe my tbr is ??? going empty ??? wh how??? but yeah mwah<333

omg hiiiiiii bestie <33 and KABVAGSJEB valid okay okay here we go !! i’ll rec 5 and disclaimer: most of these are going to also be on my tbr LMAO whoops bc i haven’t read in so long so 😭

1. the empress of salt and fortune

this is just??? so good??? like first off they/them protagonist !! and it’s so !!!! like the first two chapters make you go huh? but once it get through that it becomes so interesting !!! it feels like you’re being told a story bc you are!!! and it’s so <333 like wowwwwww it’s just. great like the story is everything even though there’s no technical ‘plot’ like you think. also this one scene in the book with her seer…like uh. empress?? you got something you want to tell us?? 👁👁

overall id rate it 4/5 points taken off purely bc the writing style is everything i love it !! but it’s not quite memorable like certain lines don’t just stick to you after you read it like how six of crows did… yk?

2. and then there were none

i. i uh. haven’t read this yet ADSHFSHSVSHD but everyone’s telling me it’s wonderful and amazing and also mysteries are just like?? so fun especially with agatha christie writing it and it’s just. very wild i can just feel it can’t wait to read it !!!

3. the ghost bride

another one i haven’t read but isa loved it and i trust isa so yeah <3 basically this post should cover why it’s amazing and so i’m also very excited to start this next month

4. i’ll be the one

listen this is. it’s a fun cute little read if you’re bored bc this was so nice i had to pause to squeal a bit a LOT like the mc is so !!!!! she’s fat and she’s not like insecure about it like she has her moments thats so normal but she’s confident and it’s just !!! she’s basically trying to be an idol and addresses the fat phobia in the kpop industry with a healthy smacking of white girl bashing (white girl obsessed with korean culture to be specific), asians gfs as background relationships, and complicated mother daughter relationships that aren’t just ‘omg i forgive you and then we love each other’ no the resolution between them is 100% realistic and i just :’) and then !!! and then bi4bi main couple!!! CANONLY!!!! THEYRE BOTH SAID THEYRE BI IN THE BOOK LIKE !!!! they’re both korean too like <3

it’s rated 3/5 bc the writing is juvenile at time (and ngl im fine with it!! the author has written children’s books with an asian protag so the whole YA thing is new to her and it’s rlly good for her foray into this genre honestly!!!!) and also the harry potter and bts references were -_- i know the bts was going to be a thing but the hp??? when the book was made in 2020??? like in this day and age??? no thank you keep that away. there are like uhh less than 10 so a blessing ig

sorry i talked too much about this one i just have many thoughts bc this was THE book that got me out of my slump and it’s nice !! best listened to with kpop playing on low in the background <3

5. finally, the lunar chronicles

this is a nice series !!!!!! the way all the male characters are side characters and each book surrounds the girl yeah <3 the third book is kind of :/ bc there’s a relationship with a 16 yr old and a 22-23? year old i think idk but basically she’s isolated and idolized him and he’s… idk it’s weird but if you just keep in mind that ajd try and ignore how that’s the driving factor for a lot of this it’s fine !!! the plot is nice !! but yeah the rest of them are <33333 and the plot is so !!!! each book is a sci-fi retelling of a fairytale and they all blend into each other seamlessly its just so !!!! the characters are everything as well i don’t care for like half of the men ensemble but the women. aaaaah beloveds 3/5 mainly bc it’s been SUCH a long time i don’t think i can accurately judge it so we’ll stick with a decent rating yk?

also! read heartless by the same author it’s like her retelling of how the queen of hearts became the queen of hearts it’s rlly good !!! cant for the love of me rmbr most of the plot nor can reread it bc it hurts but still. rlly good !!!! 4/5 definitely

ALSO FUCKING WAIT LAST ONE

read xiran ray zhao’s book i don’t remember what it’s called but it’s coming out september 21st and it’s gonna be so fucking good like. i just know it so yeah <3

okay that’s it have fun reading <3

#this was done entirely on my phone of theres something screwed that why #BESTIE BESTIE come back august for more i’ll have like 6 more books read by then to rec to u LMAO #i was gonna rec soc duology b4 i rmbred u alrwady read it LMAO #i miss reccing books wooo #anyway ily !!!!!!! and ty for coming to me omg :’)#abi tag #ask me anything #2 am ramblings #book rec

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bbytrophy · 3 years

Text

ranking all mcc games worst to best except i do it all from memory and i don’t do any research lets go

sands of time

literally the worst game it’s so boring i’m so sorry

lasts so long and for what

i imagine it’s super degrading if you’re the one the team is like “hey stand in the middle and collect sand”

only good part is the end when they throw tomatoes at the guys in the cage i do like that actually

but when your pov gets out all early and no one is in that waiting area its like the worst feeling

bingo but fast

so un memorable it’s honestly a miracle it made it on the list at all

i know i’ve seen it but i cannot recall a single mcc or team with this game it’s just so forgettable

build mart wooooo

“is this one really your [least] favorite, or were you just told it should be”

it’s really not that bad except all the ccs i watch absolutely despise it so they don’t try as hard and that gets boring

the flashing floor thing stresses me out

too loud

that one time they gave george the only colorful build is probably the only time i enjoyed watching this game

sky blockle???? is that what it’s called??

knockoff bedwars

i feel like there are multiple games that have this premise but they’ve all blended in my mind so just sky blockle

it’s stressful and when wil falls in the 4/4 sbi stream its devastating

people just hide in the middle and you get more points for living than killing so ppl like techno who should win lose a lot and i’m a stan so >:(

parkour tag??

feel like i’ve seen this like once and honestly don’t remember it well at all

i think it’s fun but it took the place of the parkour and i rlly like that game so i’ve got a bit of a grudge

battle royal game??? hunger games???? idk it’s just fortnite in minecraft

no idea what this one is called but it’s a pvp game that my faves somehow all suck at so what’s that about

that one sapnap clip please know what i’m talking about

kinda forgettable but never done anything to me seems nice

rocket spleef

don’t think i’ve ever seen this one live?? why do they never play it??

the one where wilbur glitches thats literally the only reason it’s this high

oh yeah and “just killed a woman feeling good” also tommy always dies in this game bc he gets too focused on trying to get kills and that’s funny to me

battle box

all my faves are good at it so it’s high in my heart but content wise it’s so boring

the person who gets stuck doing the wool is usually the worst one and sometimes they get yelled at for filling in the wool too fast and that makes me sad so :(

would be lower but i like that it’s pvp based

ace race

why does wilbur hate this one so much i like it :(

super embarrassing if your last so that sucks but

it’s so satisfying to watch ppl who are good at it they go so fast i love it

that one rocket like drop one it’s newer and it’s like bfffffff three bffff two bfffff one and they all fall down and fly through like a tunnel

obviously i have no idea what this is but ik tubbo likes it and he gets literally so excited it’s my favorite thing actually

this is what ace race wishes it was

super satisfying to watch good ppl

the music?? sound effects??? soooo cool reminds me of a ride at an amusement park i love it

tgttos (close enough)

tommy likes this one >:) and him and techno had that bonding moment over speed bridging that’s really fun

punching the fans is so hilarious esp when the fan is like “gogyisgay” or “santaclause”

always fun to watch and it seems like a wide variety of ppl are good at it not just the dreams and technos

hole in the wall

tubbo won this that one time w dream and it was so fun

another one where more ppl are good at it not just the dream and technos

in fact the dream and technos seem to suck at it a lot which is fun to me

i like when everyone on the team is calling out directions and working together it’s really nice

parkour

i’m a dream and techno stan what can i say

honestly would be my top but a lot of ccs hate it and i’m easily influenced

literally the first livestream i saw live was the one mcc where dream beat it when everyone thought it was like impossible and then he goes back and helps techno w the ladder neos ahhhhhhh i have so much love

even if you don’t like this game you have to thank it for all the practicing streams we’ve gotten that stuff is gold

old karl streamsmmannsjdkdj this game has so many good memories

would be number one but actually watching it is honestly boring and frustrating if your pov sucks at it

dodge bolt

iconic classic she’s never done anything wrong

you can practice it so it’s not luck and very skill based

everyone around the teams picking a banner and cheering them on is so cute

i love when it matches the mcc theme

when there’s a clutch and everyone freaks out it really is the best energy

literally the perfect game to end on the atmosphere the fireworks everything it just really ties the games together and i feel like i’m watching an actual sport

#mcyt #dsmp #mcc #minecraft #minecraft championships #dream #technoblade #wilbur #tommyinnit #karl jacobs #i miss mcc #if i missed any #they get last place #since they were so forgettable i forgot abt them

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feelhuman · 4 years

Text

ʻ / wow , i am so excited to introduce jessica delaunchy to our current students at cape coral . she is extremely excited to join track / field & latin . coming in as a twenty one year old junior , they shouldn’t worry about fitting in . the cisfemale leo has always reminded me of zoë love smith , but some people don’t see it . trying to keep the fact that she was under witness protection from getting around this school is going to be tough . no worries , though , cape coral will create a new life for them , i assure you . ʼ

hiya beans ! i’m nae ( she / her , twenty , australia gal / acst tmz ! ) and i’m real pumped to get crackin’ & introduce you to this walking tragedy ! ── this is my gal jess , who is rlly smthin else , phew . i truly am in love with her tho & i hope ya’ll like her too ! click .... the .... read more .... now .

basic stats .

* find her full stats here !

current legal name : jessica blaire delaunchy.

nickname / alias : jess , jj. / none.

gender / pronouns : cisfemale , she / her.

dob / age : august 13 1998. / twenty one.

place of birth : long beach , california.

currently living : portland , maine.

ethnicity : curaçao , indonesian.

nationality : american.

languages spoken : primarily english , learning latin .

religion : her father was christian & her mother was muslim , so she was exposed to both growing up ( her dad wanting her to feel closer to her mother in a way. ) jess doesn’t really know which bracket she falls in , if at all , so instead she respects both . does this make sense ..... no.

sexual / romantic orientation : pansexual , panromantic.

occupation : self - employed , ig ? she takes odd jobs wherever possible , and the $$ is always under the table : house / pet / baby sittin’ , deliveries , written papers / tutoring , even ... dare i say it ... gambling.

education : scholarship student at cape coral international school.

major : archaeology.

biography .

* tw : parental / family death , murder , gang activity , & nae’s obsession with rlly bad tragic backstories .

the unfortunate beginning to this story is this : a girl understands death before she understands life ; a sad truth , a lost mother on the birthing bed as they try reviving the infant & succeed , a broken family from day one ━ she’s born novi ovard , with a head of thick raven hair & a set of lungs you can hear three floors down , but healthy , alive ; her mother meets a much more grim fate that very hour , and it’s almost as if she carries that misfortune as a stain for the remainder of her childhood , because if she wasn’t here , maybe her mother would have been .

her father is a stern man , strict & abrasive ; he loves his daughter though , that is crystal . nora grows up wanting little , and some could say that is her father’s way of over - compensating for the lack of maternal parent in the household and the way he works long hours at the police department . he remarries when nora is twelve , to a woman with a couple of daughters & a son . it’s not a bad thing , no evil step - mother or new step - siblings horror stories ; nora likes the feel of a feminine presence , likes having siblings to confide in . most importantly , she sees her father smile for the first time in years , and that’s more than enough . it’s a family , not entirely by blood , but it feels just as close ; like pieces that finally form a whole .

FAMILY OF FIVE FOUND MURDERED IN LONG BEACH SUBURBAN HOME : nora comes home from a night out with friends to find strange men in her house & bloody stains on the carpet . they don’t see her , if they had perhaps she wouldn’t be breathing right now , but she see’s them and that’s just as bad ━ the lights flash bright red & blue as the cops ask for a recount of the events that occurred , but she can only describe faces and remember a few names shouted as the culprits ran from the crime scene . they presume it’s connected to the L.A mafia , looking for justice from a cop that did them dirty a few years back , but there’s not enough evidence yet & they say her safety is at risk now . so , they offer her protection , say it’s for the best if she leaves her california life behind , leave everything behind and start anew .

portland is a big city , not entirely ideal but it’ll do for now . she leaves california as novi ovard , and is reborn as jessica delaunchy in maine ━ no one remembers a jessica delaunchy , or at least , no one truly knows who she is . she lives with her aunt , no ; her parents work overseas so she lives alone . she’s from somewhere in west virginia , except she doesn’t sound like it , so maybe it was oregon ? apparently she got expelled from her last school for setting fire to the gym , or was it trashing the headmaster’s coupé ? in truth , not much truth is known about jessica delaunchy . she’s only at cape coral because the thought of getting a free ride to an expensive school sounded appealing , and a refreshing change from a life of constant camouflage ; she only joins track , because everyone hates track . she only joins the latin club because who really has the patience for it ? jessica blends in , jessica is just jessica ━ an enigma , hell in heelys , possible undercover secret agent ( ? ) and a heck of a lot of fun to have by your side on friday nights .

other tid bits .

phew , where do i begin . . . in general she’s a pretty fun gal ! knows how to let loose & have a good time . we’re here for a fun time , not a long time , homeboys .

this is also her downfall because she will literally do ANYTHING to have fun ━ jump from a moving car ? sounds cool . jump into a tank full of piranhas ? best idea she’s ever had , get the camera , tony .

does NOT understand boundaries !! at all !! she’s not sorry !!

bit of a compulsive liar too tho ?? she’s one of those people that you never rlly know if they’re telling you the truth or just mucking around , which she is like 99 % of the time , and no - matter how much you pester her , she will just come up with more extravagant ways to deter you from the truth because she has some sort of . . . allergy to sincerity , ig .

for ex . don’t ask abt her family unless you want a 5 hr presentation on how she’s related to the lost romanov family & was disowned because they were too intimidated by her big dick energy .

really in denial ?? over everything that happened ?? she’s been ignoring the truth for years & tries not to let her thoughts wander too close to family . which is # yike !

as much as the portrays this too cool for school persona , she actually enjoys it ! she’s v smart & studious , loves history , philosophy , literature , loves it .

a complete DORK .

rlly bad attention span tho & one of those annoying ppl that waits until a person finishes talking and says ‘ u say smthin ? ’

lives on her own w/ her cat larry , who she uses as a judge of character but he hates everyone so its .... useless , but one day this asshole is gonna like someone and she’s gonna be STUNNED .

has a big heart .... somewhere . she just forgets she’s supposed to have one sometimes dfkjlhhfdhg

will always do the unconventional way of doing things because she hates following the norm or being labelled as a stereotype !! def one of those ‘ i liked it before it was COOL ’ bitter ppl too.

i think that’s iT ?? I THINK .

wanted connections .

* find her wc page here ! if nothing floats ur goat tho , pls hmu & we can figure something out ! ( either here or on d*scord : i’m stu pedasso #7836 )

#capecoral:intro #whew !! we did it .... it is Done

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mintbees · 4 years

Note

What's your opinion on all the jojo part 5 characters

GiornoLove him! ive seen people say hes boring but tbh to me hes fascinating cuz that boring personality is CLEARLY a mask he puts on. i doubt itll be discussed in canon but i hope that he eventually learns to take off that mask and just be a kid man… he seems like a little shit i love itBrunoi like him now but tbh im still not a hundred % on board cuz like. yes he cares about these kids and i know that hes doing what he does to keep them safe and give them a chance at a bright future. but he in my opinion shouldnt let the kids get involved in this stuff at all, ESPECIALLY a mission as dangerous as this one. Still like him a lot but idk im not the biggest fan of that part of his characterMistaI really like him!! hes lots of fun and i like his voice. he is only 19 but already a father of six little sons who absolutely despise him and refuse to do their one (1) job of reflecting bullets. mans looking like fugos suit almost every episode. help him.Naranciayouve seen my posts about him you already know whats up. hes dumb as rocks and cute and that is all that was needed bro! im in love!! if anything ever happens to him im going to jump into the jojo universe and knit a scarf from the veins of whoever dared to lay a finger on him! :)Abbacchiotbh i didnt like him that much at first but im warming up to him! hes clearly got a thing for bruno but like…its unhealthy because hes very much like “ill live and die by his word” and doesnt even consider himself having any purpose outside of following orders. i hope it gets touched upon and that he learns that hes got a purpose that isnt just serving others. get a therapist manFugoI think he couldve been REALLY cool. his backstory and how it relates to his stand is such good idk its not worldbuilding but? setup i guess? and his anger issues and trauma couldve made for an amazing arc but as it stands he just kinda…blended into the background for me. had his personality stood out more i wouldve definetely loved him but idk, im not too bothered by him not getting on the boat at ep 21. Really cool potential but idk he just didnt quite do it for me. Though ive heard purple haze feedback goes more in depth so ill defo be looking into that

trishShe so far also just REALLY blends into the bg for me. we havent rlly had time to develop her personality so far yet so rn shes boring as all hell to me but im excited to see that change!! her breakdown before getting into the elevator with bruno and how she grabbed his hand for support….bro someone pls comfort her shes just a kid

#i wont do all charas cuz we'll be here all day so just the main gang for now #im a super character oriented person so if u have any charas u wanna talk about with me dm me cuz id be down

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