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tomieafterdark · 1 month

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Catboy Eren drabble

cw: afab!reader, dom!eren, 18+ dni if u are a minor

I am gonna be honest, this is so unserious I don't know what possessed me to actually write it and hit poster prob should have stayed in the drafts. Anyways, it is inspired by the same person that inspired this fic because he has a catlike aura.

not proofread also click here for more content

You always thought Eren had this "grumpy cat" aura to him, and you never stopped reminding him about it. In fact, you had tried to make him say "meow" or use a catboy image as his profile picture several times, but all you were met with was him ignoring it or telling you it will never happen.

Everything he said seemed to go in one ear and out of the other, because one day when hanging out with him you decided it would be a good idea to bring cat ears and try to put them on him.

And you did. Eventually.

As if his death glare had not been enough, you just had to blurt out that he looks like a submissive catboy.

And that is how you ended up in this lovely situation.

"E-eren slow down!" You whined.

"Shut the fuck up." he hissed in irritation, pushing your head further down into the pillow.

Tears rolled down your cheeks as Eren was stretching you open more and more with every thrust, as if the position he had you in wasn’t painful enough he went in with almost no prep. Adjusting to his size was quite the challenge.

He loved watching your hole swallow his cock whole, but what he loved even more was the way you reacted to how deep he went inside of you. He could tell that none of your previous sexual partners had ever touched your cervix with their tip, nor had they stretched you so good that it feels like your first time all over again.

He kept his eyes locked on you as he fastened his pace. Your whimpering grew louder and clearer even though your face was buried in the pillow, your cries were actual music to his ears. He needed to hear them more clearly.

He suddenly slips it out, you are too fucked out to notice it at first, still arching. But next thing you know he is sitting next to you on the bed and leaning against the headboard.

“Get up y/n, I want you on top.” He commands coldly, his intimidating gaze not leaving you for a second.

You get up slowly, feeling a mix of pain and pleasure between your legs. You suddenly notice he forgot to take off the cat ears you had put on him earlier, it is very hard to not giggle but you manage to somehow muster up enough self control to keep quiet. You slowly move over to him, it is impossible to not stare at his face because of the cat ears. He looks so good with them on, and surprisingly not submissive. However the “grumpy cat” energy remains, and he looks even more annoyed now because you are taking way too long getting on top of him. Somehow he comes to the conclusion that you are being nervous because of his size but you are just in awe of how good he looks with cat ears on, you haven’t even glanced at his dick yet.

“Y/n, if you are scared of the size just say that. I can assist.” He mutters, seeming less annoyed and almost concerned now.

“Huh?” You look at him in confusion, but the dots soon connect. You are about to protest, but the way he suddenly became all attentive and kind of careful made you feel some type of way and you don't mind this going on for a bit longer.

He starts fingering you and the sudden intrusion makes you hiss but he quickly shuts you up with a kiss. You manage to take a quick glance at his cock amidst all the kissing and moaning and you feel the knot in your stomach. It is a strange mix of fear, excitement and doom. How would all that fit inside you?

All the mixed emotions and his skilled fingers bring you closer and closer to climax, he is aware of it by the way you are squeezing around his fingers and moaning louder and louder into the kiss. He stops right before you cum, you feel so close and you are so desperate that without even thinking, you quickly bring your left hand between your legs.

“Not so fast.” Your wrist is suddenly burning from the iron grip he has on it and the more you pull away the harder he grips. You whine and pout in frustration, not even looking at him directly and still looking for a way to reach your high. You are really starting to lose patience.

He grabs your lower face, making you look up at him. “If you want to cum, you will do it on my cock. Got it?” His stern voice and cold stare anchor you back to reality, and all you can do is nod.

He doesn't waste another second, grabbing you by the waist making you straddle him. You instinctively hold on to him, and he does the same to you, just he does it for a completely different reason. You held on to his shoulders because a part of you feels safe around him, while he grabbed your hips out of impatience and to teach you a lesson for putting cat ears on him.

You try to wriggle yourself out of his tight grip a bit, usually when you are on top like this you are the one controlling the pace and taking on a more dominant role but this is nothing like that. Instead, he slowly lowers you down on it and you gasp hard even though only the tip is in.

Truth be told, he is resisting the urge to slam you down on it and teach you a very hard lesson, but ever since he noticed you have not had anyone his size before he has been taking his time with you. No, not because he cares, he just thinks your reactions are hilarious. You went from “annoying and cocky asking him to meow for you” to “crying little mess that does not know what to do with herself every time he thrusts” very quickly.

He watches you intensely, you avoid looking into his eyes, it makes you feel like prey and as if his darkness is about to eat you alive even though he still has the cat ears on. The more he lowers you down on his cock, the more you are starting to believe you will feel it in your guts. He lowers you down very slowly and it gives a whole new meaning to “feeling every inch of him”.

Your mind is going a bit blank, all you can repeat is “it is so big” and “I feel so full” inside your head. On the outside you are just biting your cheek trying to not burst out in tears like you did earlier. It feels different when your face is not in the pillow, hiding from his cold sharp gaze. This has you feeling new depths of submissiveness and being vulnerable. Though he can kind of notice you are trying your hardest to keep it cool but that is nothing but a challenge to him. This makes him want to break you more.

You let out a yelp, because he suddenly slams you down on it with no warning and does not stop thrusting even for a second. You are not looking at him directly but you can tell he is smirking at the way you are struggling to keep it together.

“You were doing a good job trying to keep it together, but you have to try harder to fool me.” He whispers into your ear as one of his hands starts to caress hair. The contrast of his soft demeanor while caressing your hair and his rough thrusts that have your legs almost shaking has your mind going hazy. “I will break you either way, you might as well give in to make this easier for yourself..” he continues in his dark husky voice as his hand leaves your hair now, traveling further down caressing your clit instead.

It does not take a lot of movement to make you come undone. All that pent up energy from earlier was just waiting to be released, hanging on by a thread. The higher you feel the lower you will come down, and right now you are not just seeing stars you are seeing other galaxies. He grins as he watches you come. Your beautiful eyes are finally letting those tears out, and this time he can look into them since there is no pillow to shove your head in.

You feel so drained from that one orgasm, you end up just laying down for what feels like several long minutes. This low really matched the high.

Suddenly he climbs on top of you, his eyes even more dark and playful now. Before you can even react he, flips you on your stomach.

“Wha-” you blurt out.

“Who said I was done teaching you a lesson? I was going easy on you earlier..” He snickered as he spreads your cheeks apart.

#eren smut #eren jaeger smut #aot smut #attack on titan smut #eren x reader #eren x y/n #eren yeager smut #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager x you #smut #drabble #female reader

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crabsnpersimmons · 3 months

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Hey Crabs! I have a small question! 🦀

How do you make the pictures of your traditional art look so good!?

They are always bright and easy to see! But when I take a photo of my drawings, they always have a blue or yellow tint to them. So how do you make it look the way you do?

(Also, I want to gobble up your art it is so yummy and pretty! Sun and Moon are so precious in your style!) ❤️

Thanks! And I hope you’re having a good day! :D

no prob! there's actually a couple things i do, so here's the tl;dr:

Lighting: i use daylight or light from a neutral white lightbulb

Editing: i use my phone's built-in gallery app to lightly edit the colours so they're clear and as colour-accurate as i can get (from my screens at least)

and i'll go into a little more detail with some examples under the cut

1. Lighting

a habit of mine that i got from my IG days (ugh...) is using daylight whenever possible. daylight just lights up the whole area more evenly and relatively neutrally. this is my set up:

glamourous

basically, i put the artwork near a source of natural light and prop up a reflector (in this case, a blank page from another sketchbook) that helps distribute the light more evenly across the page, so that even the side that is furthest from the light gets some light that bounces off from the reflector. i don't always have a reflector tho, like if i'm only taking a picture of a small drawing and not an entire page, there's no need.

now, if it's dark, then i rely on my desk lamp, which uses a neutral white lightbulb. regular lightbulbs come in different temperatures, from warm to neutral to cool—so that might explain why your photos are coming out with a yellow or blue tint. warm lights are common in houses because they're cozy, while blue lights are common in working areas because, like daylight, they keep us more awake. neutral white is in between the two.

here's an example of my Moon doodle that i did recently under different lights: warm (from my bedside lamp), neutral white (from my work desk), and daylight (i don't have any cooler lights in the house, so i couldn't quite get the blue tint 😅)

now technically, NONE of these are colour accurate. so i always follow up with some light photo editing

2. Editing

now, i have 2 personal rules when it comes to editing my photos:

1) try to make it as close to the original as possible; and 2) don't spend too long on it

these are just my personal rules because... one) i'm lazy and i don't want to spend too long fixing every thing in my drawings, and two) i feel it is dishonest for me to make dramatic changes to my traditional art and still call it traditional art. whenever i do make digital enhancements (like colouring it digitally) i will tag it so no one would mistake it as purely traditional art. that's just me tho! there are no rules when you're having fun with your art and mixed media art is a thing! so do whatever you find fun and enjoyable.

also, i will try to make it as colour-accurate as possible, but i also recognize that not everyone's screens are calibrated the same way. my phone is set to a "Natural" colour setting, but on my new laptop (which i haven't figured out how to calibrate yet) is vibrant as all heck (like oh my gosh, maybe i need to start tagging everything with bright colours now, because what if someone else's laptop is this insanely vibrant and saturated??) but either way, i try not to spend too long on it because i know i won't be able to accommodate every screen.

anyways, for what i actually DO... i kinda just play around with different settings. if i took the picture under daylight, then there's not too much i adjust, usually it's the warm colours that are desaturated, so i try to make the reds pop more without effecting the blues too much.

or for my doodles, sometimes the doodle on the other side of the page is slightly visible, i'll tweak the lights and shadows and contrast levels until the background is clear enough (as long as it doesn't disturb the doodle i'm taking a photo of)

now, if your photos are coming out too yellow or blue because of your lighting, you can adjust that by tweaking the Temperature setting. here's an example of that warm Moon doodle:

already looking a little better, right? so don't worry if your photos aren't coming out accurate, there are work arounds!

here's the before and after of the Moon doodle by the way:

despite having daylight, i still needed to adjust the colours. specifically i needed to brighten up the reds and yellows, and bring back the page's natural yellowness. i also tweaked the Definition setting to make less hazy (sometimes i like the haziness tho, so i'll leave it as is sometimes).

and one other reminder: it doesn't need to be perfect, it just needs to be. a big reason why i keep coming back to traditional art is the fact that i can't control everything. i can't undo lines. i can't move things around. and i can't take the perfect picture. but it doesn't need to be perfect. drawing and sharing my art is supposed to be fun! and i don't want to put any barriers around that, or else it becomes unnecessarily stressful.

all that is to say, try out these tips if you want to, but don't treat them as hard rules and don't focus on trying to achieve perfection. just go have fun!

#ask the crab #sorry this took so long!#i wanted to make sure it was clear #cuz like #i totally understand the struggle of trying to take good pictures of your traditional art #like you worked so hard on a drawing #but then the photo ruins it 😅#so i wanted to share what i know so it might help #there are definitely more in-depth tutorials out there #this is just what i've gathered from some of them plus some advice from a food photographer friend of mine (her stuff is actually legit tho

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aleksa-sims · 6 months

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RL Simself Story ( 18+)

I was at my grandparents. N. was there a few minutes before me, but he picked me up from that dark alley that made me so scared. My Grams sent him down to me, when I called her earlier. N. was a little worried about me. I didn’t talk to him. I didn't want to and I also couldn't. I was somewhere else with my thoughts. To be honest, I was thinking about Daniel and that horrible night a few months ago. Once I entered my grandparents' apartment, even more memories of the time with D. came up. There were some pics of our wedding on the walls. And right here in my old bedroom, Daniel proposed to me. While I was looking at all our family pics, I noticed something. There were pics of Ana, my Cuz M. my Dad & me. But what happened to my uncle’s photos? Why did my Grams take his pictures off the wall?

I wanted to ask my Grandma, but she immediately started talking about my pregnancy. She asked me to keep my Baby. No matter what worries & fears burden me, my Baby is a gift from above, she said. Yea, my Gram's deeply religious. Anyway! It was pretty late. I just wanted to go to bed so I postponed our conversation until the next day. But before I did, I asked my Grams if she was mad at my uncle? Why else are his photos missing, you know? I once mentioned at the beginning, that my uncle has an illegitimate child but none of us knew about it for a long time. 14 years! Well, now it came out! And my Cuz M., moved in with my grandparents for a while, because he was also totally mad at his Dad. His mom left his Dad! She wanted a divorce. So my uncle that stupid fraud, was now all alone in his house for which he can repay the loan alone. His wife just wanted to get away from him! I would do the same in her place.😡

Back to me. I unpacked my bag. I brought some clothes, bcs I had planned to stay here for a while. I was sad. My Mom and Dad also had probs with each other. ..... Ugh, and in my bedroom where even more pics of Daniel & me. I felt sorry for Nico. This all must feel pretty crap for him to be constantly compared to Daniel. I decided to put away my wedding photos. Nico was still in the living room with my Grampa. My Grampa liked N.! It's always been that way. He could talk to Nico for hours about soccer. He wanted to know everything about N’s job. But I think Nico didn’t mind talking to my Grampa about his soccer career. Normally he is more used to rejection, when it came to that. I mean his Dad (mine too actually), he was always against N. playing soccer, as you know.... I took my cosmetic bag and was on my way to the bathroom. I opened my bedroom door and saw Nico standing in the hallway with my Cuz M.

Mario (to N.): I really wasn’t expecting you here. Hm!🤷‍♂️ Nice to see you again, dude.

Nico: Yea, same.... I didn’t mean to stop you, but would be nice if you could tell me which of those doors here, leads into your cousin’s room. I don’t wanna burst into your grandparents' bedroom.😅

Mario: Ana or Aleksa? Ha? 😜🤣

Nico: Ana?? Hell, no! I haven’t even seen Ana since A. and I got back together.

Mario: I was totally confused when I saw Philip with Aleksa last year. He was Ana's bf! I-... I had no bloody clue what was going on there! She even said you knew about it. Is that true man? Did you really want that??

Nico: Uhhm,..... won't talk abou that. But she did nothing wrong! I..... demanded certain things from her and this one thing was.............. stupid! But I didn’t take advantage of your cousin or anything. I loved her. So much. Maybe too much. 🫤🤷‍♂️

Mario: Aghh... Honestly? I don’t wanna hear any details. I was just surprised you agreed, that’s... all. And A.'s room's back there. Last door on the left. Right next to it, is my bedroom so.... keep it quiet pls. But haven’t you been here before? You should know where her room is.

Nico: No, I’ve only been to your grandparents' house with her, but, never here. I just used to pick her up a few times from here.

I went to the two to say hi to my baby Cuz. We talked a bit more. Especially about M.'s ugly room. It used to be his Dad’s. My Grandparents apartment is ....old! Older than my Dad & uncle, that's for sure. My room looked nicer! My Grams always took care of Ana's & my stuff. My sis and I were much more often here, than our Cousin. That’s why his room looked a bit neglected and was often used as a kind of....big storage space... Before Nico came to the bathrom with me, he went over to M.'s room. My Cuz borrowed him a shirt and some shorts for sleeping, so he doesn’t have to sleep naked. And they also talked about their dumb Dad's! This one thing, they had in common now.

Hm, I wouldn’t mind N. sleeping naked next to me, I thought, as I watched him take a shower. I didn’t want to be mad at him anymore, but that damn Stephanie!!! He dumped me again two days ago, just because his stupid ex fiancée made drama like last time. Agh, it didn’t go on like that! I had to sort it out with him and talk about it. But... I really didn’t feel like talking about Stephanie that night. So I just kept doing my skincare....

Nico: I'm sorry..... Won't you talk to me?☹️

Me: What can I say??? ... It’s always the same. I ask you to stay with me, you promise, but then you leave anyway. This is the third time you’ve left me because of her.

Nico: Her fucking family came back today. Now it’s finally over, I don’t have to take care of her anymore. She's gone. She's with her parents.

Me: My feeling tells me she won’t give up! She’ll come up with more excuses and lies, to get you back. And I know you’re not stupid. That means, you can't let go of her either.

Nico: I swear it’s not like that! I can’t let YOU go. I want you! I love you. And I want our Baby. Honestly!... I saw that one pic of you earlier. Your Grams told me you were 5. It was your first day at school. I immediately recognized you by your curly hair and big, brwon eyes. I wish our Baby will be a girl and look exactly like you.

Okay, that was really cute. Besides, he was still almost naked. I admit, it was hard for me to reject him. I think my hormones were partly responsible for me wanting N. sm. The pregnancy not only increased my desire for him, I will notice that I have generally become more sensitive. I cried for almost every stupid little thing.😩But I was also very happy! N and I went to bed. He wanted to settle this issue about Stephanie with me, but I told him, I didn’t want to talk. I wanted him. But tomorrow we will argue about exactly this topic! His ex! Also about Alex!I mean Alex's message/letter. Alex wanted to see me!

Oh, and Dilek will come to me to....... see Nico. She seemed to be more excited about it (him), than I was. She was a big fan of N. 😒 I was just glad Philip wasn’t there. The two in the same room with Dilek?? No thanks!🤢 I will avoid this, as long as I can!!!!!!!!!!!

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#ts4 #sims 4 story #sims 4 #rl story #myrlgameplay #unplanned pregnancy

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general--winter · 1 year

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Hello! Prob my first time using tumblr but oh well... i would like to request headcannons for Hilbert/Black/Touya (god he has so much names-) with an s/o that is autistic and has problems with sounds, if you want to you can put it after bw2! <3

author's note: Ah new user! Hello and welcome! He really does have too many names, but I generally refer to the protagonists by their manga names/personalities, so I'll be calling him Black and he's 16 in this. Personally, while I have some experience with sound sensitivity, I am not neurodivergent, so I hope I was able to do justice to the portrayal of this. Please let me know if I made any mistakes and direct me towards resources so I can do better by requests such as this in the future.

rating: general

fandom: pokemon

pairing: black x autistic!gn!reader

word count: 557

warnings: none not covered in summary

summary: Headcanons on Black with a reader who has hyperacusis (sound sensitivity) due to autism

You know, I think Black would actually have trouble picking up on this at first. He’s very scatterbrained and focused on fifteen things at a time. The training regimens for his Pokemon, their diets and schedules, filling out his Pokedex… he is very meticulous about the way he goes about these things. That doesn’t mean he’s not caring about it though. The second he realizes you’re struggling, he’ll be right there by your side to help. He’s incredibly loyal and empathetic to your struggles with overstimulation and will do anything to help you feel better.

So, when you’re watching him train his team, something about the combination of cries from his Pokemon and the sounds of their moves raging against the training models seems to drive knives into your ears. The muscles in your face twitch and clench, and you paw at your ears to try and plug them in any way you can. You really wish you could stay to help Black and give him advice, but you knew it would be bad news if you put up with the torturous noise long enough to put you into an emotionally sensitive state.

This is exactly why you quickly let Black know you were leaving the training grounds to go back to stay in your room in the Pokemon Center lodging. The only answer he gave for now was a noise of affirmation as he continued to work hands-on with his Pokemon. You think you may have pushed yourself a little too far, though. Even after you slipped on your noise-canceling headphones, you could still feel your heart pounding in your chest. It was excruciating, sitting and trying to calm down after going past your limit unintentionally with the noise.

Black, though, would start to think about you when he had a moment. Why had you left so abruptly? Was everything alright? He gathered up his belongings and Pokemon and went to check on you in your room next to his. He caught sight of you wearing your headphones curled up in bed and knew what had happened immediately. He would take a seat on the edge of your bed to catch your attention, showing you a note on his phone. Hugs or no?

If you were to accept, Black would scooch next to you and wrap his arms around you, making sure you’re fully enveloped. He wants to help chase away the bad feelings with good, so rest assured you’re not getting out for the rest of your day. He’ll be your weighted blanket for you! When you’re calmed down, the two of you would spend the rest of the day catching up on reading or quiet work that you need to get done, perhaps taking breaks to watch funny internet videos or an episode of television between tasks.

If you were to deny, he would give you a nod and a smile, leaving the room before coming back with your favorite snack, a water bottle, and as many blankets as he could muster for you to Swadloon swaddle yourself in lieu of your weighted blanket at home. He would take a seat at the room’s couch and open a book or pull out a portable gaming device, plug in his own headphones, and sit by to make sure you were okay and keep you company.

#pokemon #pokemon fanfiction #pokemon x reader #black x reader #hilbert x reader #touya x reader #request #headcanon #gender neutral reader #i love pokespe black. what an idiot nerd.#help him he cant do anything but battle pokemon

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jerrydevine · 1 year

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ok movie may rankingsssss its quite frankly soooo fucking long so i put it under a read more :) MWAH

31. moonage daydream 2022 um so when todd haynes basically said that reagan being in power was david bowies fault in velvet goldmine i get what he was saying when i watched the second half of this. it was so annoying listening to bowie talk about how he was like crazyyyy back then now hes normal (annoying and not in a fun way) boo

30. ladies and gentlemen, the fabulous stains 1982. ok this was actually a flop i wanted to like it so bad but i did not. boo

29. the daytrippers 1996. this was such a movie my indie snob cousin loves. it kind of felt like a long ass seinfeld episode. sorry women. the gay reveal was not. fun. it was 90s straight people trying to do a twist :/

28. muppet treasure island 1996 was ok. it was no the great muppet caper ..

27. spontaneous 2020 i did cry because of this movie i thought it was just gonna be a silly heheh good bad movie but i did cry. and they played forth of july sufjan stevens :(

all the movies after here i would rewatch and i liked :) i had a good movie may !!

26. descendants 2 2017 was not as good as descendants 1 or 3 to me now .. but thats ok they literally had chillin like a villain and the letterkenny guy

25. descendants 3 2019. hmmm i wanna keep her by descendants 2 just so theyre not lonely in this list. the plot was like ok mal having to do her morality thing again thats ok. evie was soooooo izzy lightwood and her loser ass march band boyfriend was sooo simon :)

24. murder on the orient express 1974 was better than death on the nile 1978 and there was a character with my name :) but i think i do not care as much about agatha christie mysteries as i thought i would. thats ok :)

23. arrival 2016 is prob one of the first times i knew about the specific field of the protag and it made me so mad because i spent the whole movie like. she would not fucking do that. she would not say that. come on. and of course the u.s. propaganda was like a frontal migraine but i guess it was good

22. the handmaiden 2016. why didnt anyone tell me about. you know. the plot of the movie. great lesbian sex but what the hell wasall that.

21. donnie darko 2001 was like ok what . fine ok whatever

20. emma 1996 holy shit i watched a lot of 1996 movies this month. ummmmm ewan was there and it was literally emma. what more do you want me to say. it was good ish :P

19. dungeons & dragons: honor among thieves 2023 was so long no movie should be longer than 2 hours but it did feel like playing d&d with my buddies and sophia lillis was there :')

18. i know what you did last summer 1997. its like none of you even care that kevin williamson who wrote this AND scream 1996 is literally a gay ass homosexual man. and my friend.

17. red army 2014. i feel like this should be its own other thing because it was just a movie i would watch at 15 to learn as much about hockey as humanly possible. and not for fun for like mental illness reasons. anyway hockey :)

16. crip camp: a disability revolution 2020 is like red army 2014 like. informative and interesting documentary ! not able to rank it with fiction films i dont think so dont take its spot too seriously.

15. poison 1991. dont worry about it im just studying todd haynes and this movie was not as good as other movies i watched this month but actually its the best movie ever after velvet goldmine. or not its not in my top 3 todd movies of all time but thats ok it still set up many of the things he talks about in his later films esp the connection between the horror section and safe 1995 :)

14. the secret world of arrietty 2010. i didnt watch this until this year bc it was released just after when i would sit down and watch a new little ghibli movie. i wanted to rewatch totoro more than watch new ones.but it WAS the borrowers sooo fun :)

13. monty python and the holy grail 1975. they made lancelot soooooooo ugly which was like a joke in itself to me because lancelot would never look like that. but umm yeah my dad loves this movie and so many little jokes i thought were just family jokes were actually from this movie hehehe

12. the great muppet caper 1981 literally had peter falk in it and they knew they were in a silly movie and they kept saying kermit and fozzie were twins it was so silly and fun :)

11. seven up! 1964. british people getting studied is literally so real and true. i cant wait to continue in the series and see how these kids change..

10. some like it hot 1959. I NEED TO WATCH MORE MARILYN MONROE MOVIES ASAP BTW THIS MOVIE ROCKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

9. this is spinal tap 1984. ummm yeah this was good. very good even. and christopher guest from my movies was there doing a horrible accent it was awesome :)

8. dottie gets spanked 1993. okok this is my todd haynes auteur studies and it is such a short film that foreshadows his future work i love you forever and ever my best friend todd haynes :D!!!!!!!!!!

7. videodrome 1983 had crazyyyyyyyyyyyy special effects i enjoyed the blowing up bodies and the tvs trying to kill you and the toronto..

6. big eden 2000 i wish they didnt have that whole plot with his high school bestie that was annoying and not whimsy but everything else and i mean EVERYTHING else was sooooo good and beautiful and i love you movie

5. elvira's haunted hills 2001 YIPPEE ELVIRA!!!!!!! RIFF RAFF WAS THERE!!! she talked like she was still a 2000s california girl but in 1850s europe it was awesome

4. rye lane 2023 was sooooo good and love is real and i need to go to england or i will die . woah that was an anglophile ass sentence but its true.

3. stardust 2007 YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO basically thats it. it was a movie that loves whimsy and the power of love. beth please watch it i mean it you would love it soooooo much

2. the watermelon woman 1996 i love you lesbians i love you movies i love you movie lesbians. everyone should watch it its soooo good

1. velvet goldmine 1998 my best friend forever of course no one could be better <33

#ok heheheh thank you beth and abby for the reminders :)#if you guess the top movie you know me for realzies plus i love you <3 #talk #ref

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pqrachel · 3 months

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So I came across @spicymancer's "Rumble after Dark" fighting game OCs and it kind of inspired me to think about a fighting game AU featuring a bunch of my OCs from different universes. (Mine wouldn't be as NSFW but maybe a little never hurt, since it's just for art anyways...)

None of this obviously would be canon but just thinking about the fighting game archetypes as a method of character exploration has been fun. And most of my fighting game experience comes from platform fighters so my archetype knowledge is a little whack but if you'll excuse that then,

My initial castings are these: (Long-ass ramble with multiple OCs and no sketches yet.)

Blanksford Series: -Gabby (Would be a Hit & Run Mix Up character. Using their teleportation and skateboarding to move around in a unique way. Might have a playstyle similar to Bridget Guilty Gear.) -Madi (While she's doesn't have any powers in-universe and wouldn't be much of a fighter on her own, her TTRPG char KyoVee would be a fun ranged zoner character. Definitely a lil shit, think Pac-Man / Pichu from Smash.) -Taylor (Give him a bit of gym time and training and he could be a well-rounded rushdown type of fighter, nothing too gimmicky prob my most standard fighter on the list. To make him more unique he could double as the announcer because that'd be super in character.) -Aeri (Even though she has powers in-universe she avoids conflict at all costs, so instead her TTRPG char (who doesn't have a name yet) would be an excellent grappler. A big orc with an axe. In my head I'm thinking of that scene in Drawtective where Gyorik put the bad guy in arm jail, mixed with Loxodont from Rivals 2.) -Artemis (Might take her off this list as I do sketches but for now she's a ranged zoner. Using her bow to keep distance, might play similar to Green Arrow from Injustice, idk) -Ultra-Dude (Of course I had to feature this dude as a heavy. He'd just be great for it. And it's not like I've been using him in-universe for anything other than that asshole with the strength and healing powers.)

Colostle: -Correll [Pirate Arc] (I think Correll would be a fun mid-range zoner. Using her spear to keep distance and her ice magic as a fun gimmick to make her a bit more unique. -Ivy Reyne (Definitely a fast and fun rushdown character. Like imagine Maypul from Rivals but grounded. She's agile AF and hits harder than you'd expect.) -Gratt & Tic Tac (I thought this would be a fun duo-fighter. Since Aanya's not my own OC I wanted to keep my Colostle reps pre-Tic Tac's death as far as timelines go but Tic alone wouldn't be enough. I didn't want to pair him with Correll cuz I thought that'd be a little hard and honestly the thought of leaving Gratt out felt bad, and with Tic Tac's help they could actually stand a chance.)

Mystic Mysteries: -Emra Corvus (The OG MysMys character. While I haven't focused on her a lot in-universe lately, I think she could be fun here. Using different elemental magic as stances. Like a mix of Robin and Shulk from Smash.) -Tehl (My biggest OC excluding actual gods and monsters. Xe'd easily be a heavy. Probably with a playstyle similar to Sylvanos from Rivals, instead of forest powers though xe'd used alien tech to backup xir playstyle.) -Dawn Ronik (I think she'd be a pretty well-rounded fighter. Again borrowing some of Tehl's alien tech for support but mostly just beign agile and powerful. Nothing too strong in any category but very hard to take advantage of.)

And my random OC to finish it off: -Syble (She was originally design as a rivals workshop character before I realized how much effort making an actual workshop character really was. She'd play kind of similar to Maypul or Shiek but with her own teleportation gimmicks. I've talked about these when I designed her and I think they're still on my tumblr somewhere though you might have to check back a bit to find them.) -pqkR6 (Easily a fighting game character, it'd be a robotic shoto fighter. Agile and able to take hits but also quick enough to get in its own damage.) -Hackphlegm (As a goblin sorcerer, he'd be a fun ranged hit&run/zoner type fighter. Might be too similar to Emra in playstyle would have to differentiate them somehow but other than that he's a solid inclusion.) -Darcy (Not a character I thought I'd bring back but looking at the archetypes I thought I needed more heavies. Darcy's werewolf form would be a grappler who's pretty big and would be weird to design around but fits really well into a fighting game.) -And also I might need one or two new OCs to tie it all together. (Off the top of my head I think one archetype I'm missing is the enby with a scythe archetype. You know characters like Thanatos, Testament, & Sawyer.) -And for another... (I'm also somehow missing a swordie. Like where's my over-inclusion of Fire Emblem characters. Like I have bladed weapons but they're mostly daggers. Gabby's skateboard maybe could be used like a sword but they wouldn't be a "swordie". Again Aanya's not my OC even though she's in my stories so I don't want to use her. Maybe make a few origin changes and my Terrarian could fit this role. Or Drake is an OC I haven't touched since I removed him from Blanksford canon years ago, he might fit here.)

#justsometext #fighting game au

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dzpenumbra · 2 years

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9/7/22

Things are taking shape. I woke up in the afternoon yesterday, pulled up the apartment building website, found an application on it and... immediately nose-dove into anxiety city.

The first thing that caught my eye was Employment stuff... And I'm sitting here like... okay... how do I elegantly and succinctly let the recipient of this form know that I am a freelance artist/content creator and I really can't predict my income (hint - currently there is none), but my parents are helping out with it until it becomes sustainable, so it should be reliable. I suck at doing tests and filling out forms, it's never "fill in the correct answer" it's "fill in the answer we're expecting". Also, what the fuck gives with this layer of separation there? How about we just do a short interview and you ask me some questions? How come you give me a spot like ____________ <- that fucking big to put in info about a complicated situation. I failed a few high school classes because of that same logic, despite getting the answers correct. Figure that shit out, I got the answers to an entire test correct, but the way I did it was "incorrect", so I fail?!

Anywho... XD I freaked out about that, like "oh fuck, how am I gonna reassure these people I can actually make rent at all when I'm expecting like $200/month on paper". Had a mini-oh-shit-moment about whether I can even make the career work at all, of course. Then I got to the sections former landlords are supposed to fill out. I started going through their checklist - Has the tenant ever had utilities shut off for missed payments? (yes, a few times this year, they were autopay accidents but my landlord doesn't know that) What condition did they keep their last residence? (well, there is fungus growing through the walls, the place reeks of mildew and rotting wood, there is a 1 square foot hole in the wall right next to the sliding glass porch door and it's rotting the entire doorframe out to the point where I'm scared to open the door, the foundation is cracked, there's scuffs on the ceiling, there's a suspiciously fist size indent/hole in one of the walls that just radiates shame, the carpet is fucked, there are hookah coal burns in the carpet from times I slipped and dropped them and they melted the cheap synthetic fibers, it smells like cat litter, and I guarantee there are plenty of rodent corpses around as well, quite a free feast for them since the cat is getting older.)

I got really worried about... if my landlord tells them I was a shitty tenant. I'm not a neat-freak. When I lived with my ex, I kept things orderly, organized and clean, but when that ended, I just didn't really give a fuck. I don't really need things to be clean or orderly, and I don't really mind chaos. Surprisingly, I don't even really lose stuff. But... structure would domesticate me a bit more, so I'm a bit less feral and have more framework to live with. So I'm planning to work towards it, hoping I can meet a partner who is also somewhere in between and hopefully start shaping a home and life together. That's the end goal.

This is a long winded way of saying that I'm really messy, and turned into a bit of a hoarder too, because I really detest the idea of how everyone just throws fucking everything away nowadays. Half a dinner? Throw it in the bin. Paper towels? Toss it. I don't even like throwing away 15 year old cables that I held on to "just in case". I'm figuring it out, I gotta get in a habit of like selling my shit on eBay or something, that'd prob help out on a lot of fronts. I'd love it if someone wanted to help me figure that out, I've never done it before, could be a good thing for me. But the past few years, my place has been gross, and once I leave and my landlords find out the extent of it - which I have been deliberately hiding from them out of stupid PTSD shame, which is technically a breach of my lease... - I'm afraid they'll call my new landlord up and go "hey, just wanted to let you know that this tenant really fucked up this place, so maybe don't rent to them."

The combo of those concepts just made me start catastrophizing. Like, I can see it so vividly in the moment, it's like "fuck, I really thought this was going to work, but not only is this application going to fail, but it's going to be humiliating and potentially leave me homeless." I get the catastrophizing from both of my parents, so lucky me! My anxieties made a very compelling case and I was pretty much sold. I called up my mom immediately and tried to communicate my concerns. They were not perceived as panicking or being anxious, there was enough narrative, enough evidence there for me to really think it was just... a lost cause. Like... not even worth trying to apply, thereby avoiding having to "explain myself via my career" and avoid putting my fate into the hands of my landlords who don't talk to me.

After about an hour of going back and forth and feeling like she was trying to just tell me I was wrong, she switched methods. Or something, something changed and she started hearing me out in my concerns. We addressed them individually and it started to take shape a bit. She explained how I could just do a separate sheet of paper to explain my abnormal career situation to them, which I initially was thinking "no one reads anything over 2 paragraphs nowadays", but now think is actually a really good idea. Then we addressed the housing stuff, which she helped me realize are not goooooood but in a rural area like this are not uncommon, and it's not my fault the house was built really shitty, and I'm actually a pretty good tenant for putting up with the place falling apart around me and not making them spend a bunch of money fixing up a property they're most likely going to demolish when I leave. Most importantly, she noticed and pointed out that these things weren't my fault, which I don't think I've heard another person actually say to me. It helped me a lot to hear that.

I very often blame myself for bad situations I end up in, like I should've known better, I should've been smarter, I should've made more money, all that. I guess that's like... self-victim-blaming? I don't really like buzzwords because people associate incredibly overpowering subtext to them, but I guess that's the right kind of concept. I not only martyr myself for people, but I find a way to blame myself for shit that's happening to me. Probably part of the family scapegoat thing. I guess maybe it's a trauma thing? It sounds familiar from workshops I've been to and whatnot, in all the time I spent studying trauma, relationships and PTSD stuff. I think I need to engage with that soon and explore it more, it's a BIG one for me.

Pee break. Max tried to go for my ankles again when I was heading back to bed, she came really close too. I tried to distract her with a toy, but she just was really dead-set on it. She made some not-too-happy meows when I tried to stop her, too. She's either doing it because she wants to play and didn't get to today, or because she's in pain and trying to get my attention. It sucks to have to figure out which. Since she just sprinted out of the room and stopped to play with a ball toy quickly on the way out, I'm going to assume it's just wanting to play. It is dawn and she is a crepuscular apex carnivore, I do need to be a bit more fair with her, she's just being what she is.

I was thinking about how I really love automatic writing. I am so fucking incredibly grateful I failed out of English class in high school. It formed a fork in my personality which created the weird duality I am today. My English teacher who failed me was the father of... I think 4? sons and 2 daughters. All but one kid skateboards, the only one I knew personally was the one who didn't, of course... They actually became pros, all of them. And started their own company. They're really good. I never got to know any of them, I skated with the youngest like once or twice back in high school. Like he was a freshman when I was a senior kinda deal. Well, their dad was my English teacher and failed me out.

I actually remember I did my first video project for his class... it was a video project for "The Odyssey", and my friend Steve (the one who got me into freestyle skiing) and I wanted to make a skate/skiing video for it. It was bullshit, really. We just wanted an excuse to make a cool skate/ski video, like a Jackass/CKY video, but maybe with less obscene shit. We actually did it. I think it had Rage Against the Machine in it and everything. This was like 2003 too, so we probably burned it onto a DVD to present to the class, and shot on MiniDV cameras. I hope he didn't fail me because of that project, that would be shitty, because that's what I wanted to do for a career. And what several of his sons are still doing full-time for a living. And I never was even introduced to them. So I wonder what would've happened if that teacher had, instead of failing me... introduced me to his sons. That could've been a very, very different life.

In the end, failing that class (and history, and probably algebra, too) sent me to a special education program. That totally doesn't fuck with a teenager's self-esteem. To be in a special education program because a teacher didn't like me, I have ADD and struggle to sit still and read something long-winded and boring, and I prefer to explore practical mathematics rather than memorize and regurgitate ciphers. In this special education program, I got to choose what I wanted to learn about. Which was fucking awesome. There were some Vietnam-era movies and games being released at the time and I got curious, I used to be a big WWII buff as well, so I took a one-on-one history class on Vietnam. And my new English teacher? I told him I took a Creative Writing class and aced it. He hooked me up with Beat Poetry for a full semester. It changed my approach entirely. I became obsessed with the concept of stream-of-consciousness. I got so annoyed with how over-refined things were, how scripted everything was in life. I love the rawness and unpredictability of just letting pure creative energy flow out of you, and not having to worry about the results. Like just dancing without thinking about how you're moving, like a kid would do, but with words.

And eventually this led to poetry, which led to lyrics, which led to hip-hop and freestyling. For almost 20 years, I have been writing lyrics that have bloomed from this ever-evolving method. Sometimes I would just write my thoughts verbatim. Sometimes I would write off a theme word as a prompt. Most of the time I would just stitch together a rhyme/rhythm pattern syllable by syllable. I would shape the lyrics off the rhythmic sound they made, like playing a drum or a guitar, and let my subconscious choice of words shape the meaning. And holy fuck is it crazy how every single word of it makes sense.

Then the stream of consciousness method linked to visual art. In fact, a few years back, I actually did like a video blog that was basically this - smoking a bowl and then just... talking. Just exploring different concepts while smoking a cigarette. I called it "Smoke Break", it was supposed to be a micro-podcast series with guests meant to simulate and capture the real-life conversations that happen when people step outside for a smoke break. But when no one joins you for that, well... it got a bit depressing. But in the end, I like this method more. With the Smoke Break, I would kinda rabbithole on existentialism, meaning of existence shit, spiritual shit. I don't not like that stuff, it's just not at the forefront right at the moment. I feel like this method of talking about my current experience, rather than theoretical theology or whatever, I just feel more confident in it. I feel like I'm writing more from my experience than my speculations.

So... basically... if I hadn't been failed out of English, I may possibly maybe have been on a pro skate team by now, but I would have never been introduced to Jack Kerouac. I never would have pursued writing, or my solo music. I never would have gotten into graffiti, which ignited my passion for art. I would not be the person I am today, and this that's happening right here, this writing would not be happening. It's crazy how the tiniest of things at just the right time can lead to a completely different fate.

Getting to bed a bit earlier tonight. Didn't get to call the apartment yesterday, but I have a very actionable plan with my mom now and I'm feeling pretty comfortable with it. I can actually see my next life pretty clearly now, and it doesn't look half bad. I'm gonna make time to brainstorm streaming ideas tomorrow, get my head in the mindset. But for now, I slumber.

#diary #journal #stream of thoughts #spilled thoughts #mental health #self care #online journal #self improvement #stream of conscious writing #panic anxiety #attention deficit disorder (add)#stream of consciousness #beat poetry

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hhhecates · 3 years

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After the fushiguro and maneater!reader as the slandering duo of Jujutsu High, I hereby come back offering you the soft version of this headcanon cause now I can't get it out of my head, so let's cry together.

Megumi was never the type for affection. He doesn't know if it's because of his family history, because of a father who was never there in the first place and a mother that died too soon, or for whatever else reason. Megumi doesn't like thinking it's because of his parents, because of his family. He doesn't like giving his dad too much credit when he can't even remember his face in the first place, he doesn't like putting his mother at fault when she had none. He doesn't like the thought of still being affected by things happened so long ago and that should just stay in the past. Because he especially doesn't like the thought of having unresolved matters, of holding a grudge for how things "could have been", because he knows he holds no resentment at all. So, why, why would this affect him?

He, instead, likes thinking that he's just like that. Megumi knows he likes having his boundaries, maybe that's all.

He's just like that. Wrinkles his nose at the mere mention of affection, and when his friends tease him about how obvious he's being about his distaste, megumi even rolls his eyes, muttering about how he was never trying to be subtle in the first place.

Fushiguro prefers it when people keep their distance from him, both physically and metaphorically. When young he would swat away his sister's hands trying to mess up his hair, and in the same fashion now he turns away more than a little miffed by his sensei's antics or pinches between his fingers the arm gojo ever so often throws over his shoulders with a grumpy mumble of "please get off".

It's a surprise to everyone, to megumi himself too, when he allows itadori and nobara a little closer, just a little closer to his heart and his mind.

Fushiguro takes nobara's annoying poking and yuji throwing his arm over him with little more than a playful scoff (to which ofc gojo is outraged, but megumi merely ignores him).

And not for surrender (cause admittedly the two of them are just as annoyingly touchy as gojo) but because for the first time megumi truly doesn't mind.

He listens to kugisaki rambling about whatever little thing upset her for hours to no end, offering little hums of acknowledgement from time to time (which would probably piss off nobara if megumi were anyone else, but coming from him? It's already a big achievement and nobara knows he's actually listening to her intently). He even gives in (and every single time too) to yuji's pleads to let him play around with his divine dogs.

Megumi has learnt to stand a little taller, not minding anymore when his shoulders brush into itadori's or when he sits close to nobara. Fushiguro even relishes it, when they're all together. It's comfortable, he would dare say.

And then megumi realizes that it's different, he doesn't know what is, but it just is. It feels different, a little more safe: when Inumaki senpai pats his shoulder or when maki senpai bonks his head with one of her weapons after training.

It feels a little safer. But still not secure.

Fushiguro still doesn't let anyone even step in his room, smacks itadori across the head when he does as much as peak inside. He still sits two steps away from all the others when they eat together, he does it every time, and every time maki and nobara yell at him to sit closer, and only then he acquiesces.

And sometimes it's so downright ridiculous and hilarious that's borderline painful, because fushiguro still gets all cross eyed and defensive when nobara gets too close to him when she tries to "tame that damn porcupine on your head, girls won't even look your way looking like that", but the same fushiguro won't even flinch when in every battle he gets the most bruises, when blood trickles down his temple or out of his mouth, when he doesn't esitate one second to push itadori out of the way and take the blow in his place.

Megumi doesn't like affection, soft touches that might be deceiving, you never know when they can turn sour. Hell, fushiguro is ashamed to admit that probably he'd take a punch over a caress, because at least with the former he'd be sure of what's coming.

Maybe that's why he gets along so well with reader after all.

Reader whose words can hurt much more than a punch, and that even when courteous or sugarcoated, they're still never fake. Reader who is caustic and sarcastic but attentive and caring if they choose to care about you.

It starts with fushiguro just following on their words and attitude, his growing habit of teaming up with them in discussions is his own way to get closer to them.

Then he allows himself closer too, because reader too, sits two steps away from all the others at lunch, but when inumaki or maki point it out, they just say it's fine and don't worry about it, now it's fushiguro who takes it upon himself to sit in the middle, to sit in between those two steps away that now just make him one step closer to both reader and the rest of the group.

Fushiguro is the one that notices that reader not only steps away but flinches when you get too close, and reader is the one that asks megumi if it's okay for them to touch his hair and brush off the leaf that got tangled in it.

It's not a surprise, when reader is the first one allowed in fushiguro's room, because megumi just can't fucking sleep, and he asks reader for comfort, and reader nods understandingly, the dark circle under their own eyes telling of their own troubles sleeping.

What instead comes as a surprise, is how the two most pissy and introverted and sarcastic individuals of Jujutsu High, i.e. reader and fushiguro, actually turn out to be the most soft and touch starved. The two of them probably become cuddle buddies and always nap together because they find so much safety and comfort in each other. Also they're probably the only ones that never mind each other touch (like brushing hair out of theit eyes, getting an eyelash from the other's cheek) because while they always have their guard set on high, fushiguro and reader know that when they decide to do something like that for the other it's always out a place of utter respect and care (and not to be a menace, looking right at you gojo).

This would prob leave everyone dumbfounded, inumaki and yuuta first and foremost since they are the closest to reader: especially yuuta because he is reader's best friend, but they're prob still pretty awkward around each other (pliz, shy babies) he's not jealous or anything though ofc, inumaki though, yeah he's jealous and really open about it.

Itadori and nobara, instead, probably end up joining the nap times because they are annoying little shits like that and reader loves them too much to say anything. Fushiguro tries to act annoyed but they can't even take him seriously.

Also please, naps become so chaotic with nobara and itadori, they probably end up all in tagled limbs and tumbling on the floor, the blanket nowhere to be seen.

With time though, more people join, cause inumaki is a menace and won't be left out, so naps time become chilling sessions with all the second and first years laying on the floor and talking or just resting, especially after missions.

And now? Now megumi thinks that maybe he doesn’t mind affection after all.

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waynedunlaptheorgandonor · 3 years

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watched s11ep1

i will provide you with a quick review before i disappear back into the ether of twd avoidance

lots of spoilers under the cut. also i wrote way too much and i worked all night and haven’t slept so i didn’t bother to reread literally any of it, so it might be completely nonsensical, tho if you don’t expect that from me by this point idk whose blog you’ve been reading

enjoy:

hokay, first off, i’ll start by saying that i enjoyed it more than i expected to. i’ve been avoiding any sort of discussion about stuff, but my google algorithm is so fucked at this point that i still get recommended articles and stuff every now and then, so i was already pretty aware of what i was walking into, and was expecting it to be eh, but actually i prob enjoyed it more than i enjoyed the finale

(don’t get too excited tho, the finale was rly boring lmfao)

anyway

episode starts off with a tense scouting mission

it takes .005 seconds into the episode for caryl to exchange a look of longing, establishing that they are still having weird conflict and are both too fucking stubborn to do anything about it even tho they hate it desperately

i imagine that will continue for a while

rosita, kelly, carol, maggie, what’s her face with the bad hair, and lydia (i think that’s everyone?) lower down to some army bunker or something, where a bunch of walkers are taking a snooze, and the girls are very respectful of walker naptime, and do their best not to wake them up

obviously they eventually wake up, but i’ll get to that in a sec

as they’re tiptoeing through the walker tulips, there’s this split second where carol spots a machine gun, and looks at maggie with a face like, “can i plzzzz, i am mad horny for that machine gun,” but maggie tells her no. (i 110% expected her to defy orders and accidentally wake up all the walkers, but she actually behaved herself for once. well. mostly)

never fear, tho, after the girl gang collects a bunch of MREs they go back to wait for the dudes waiting up top to pull them up, and bc men ruin everything, one of the ropes break, and daryl catches it before it falls, but then a slow motion drop of blood falls on a walker’s face, and just like that, walker naptime is over, and carol uses her bow and arrow for two seconds before she is like “fuck this” and whips out the machine gun

yes, she is super hot using it

yes, daryl watches her do it

anyway, all the other girls get rescued, and carol is about to be pulled up, but bc she is a #girlboss, she first makes a beeline for one more crate full of MREs. daryl covers her while she gets the loot, and when she gets back up top they have another charged moment as carol hands him back his knife

just fuck already, jfc

titles!

cut to alexandria where everything is still not smilestimes

BUT, we do get to see uncle daryl run and hug rj and judith (and dog), and FUCKING HERSHEL JR, LIGHT OF MY LIFE is also there

istg, they could not have casted a better child, i a d o r e him

oh, and some friends of maggie’s show up too, idk

cut to a staff meeting where everyone is like, whomp whomp, we’re all gonna starve to death unless we figure out something quick

cue maggie going, “oh, i know where food is, but it requires me to tell you my tragic backstory, in case anyone didn’t watch my bottle episode”

she tells her dramatic backstory about all her friends getting slaughtered by the reapers for no apparent reason, and then she’s like “anyway, let’s go back there!”

no one thinks it’s a great idea, but a group of people decide to go anyway, including daryl and gabriel. rosita is super pissed that gabriel is going, and carol doesn’t go, probably partly bc it’s a shitty fucking idea, and also bc they have to keep caryl apart bc otherwise they’ll fix their problems ahead of schedule and they won’t be able to drag out the needless angst

daryl looks kind of annoyed that carol doesn’t volunteer to go

bitch, i thought you wanted her to stop putting herself in the line of fire! make up your damn mind!

moving on

cut to a thunderstorm, where, if you look closely, you’ll notice daryl is wearing the STUPIDEST hat i’ve ever seen. just get an umbrella, jfc

for some reason negan is with them, bc ig he knows his way around washington dc, and no one in six years has bothered to figure out how to get around the city and/or get a map, and he is like “hey guys, maybe we shouldn’t try to walk in this fucking hurricane,” and everyone is like “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!”

this will be a common occurrence

but eventually daryl is even like “actually, it’s rly unpleasant out here, and my hat is mad stupid, can we go inside plz?”

so they go inside an old metro station, which is actually a rly cool cinematic choice. i rly like the idea, and they executed it rly well

speaking of executions

there are some fucking RULL CREEPY walkers. idk why they bothered me so badly, but they were what they at first assumed were corpses wrapped up in tarps, but turns out none of them had been properly put down, so they go through killing these rotted bodies that had supposedly been there since The Fall, and it’s very gross and cool

this entire time, btw, negan is like “hey, i know i’m a shitty person, but i have some rational arguments about why we shouldn’t be doing this right now,” and everyone is like, “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!” and he’s just like “god fucking damnit”

(i forgot to mention that at one point, when they’re headed into the metro station, negan is trying to warn ppl of the potential danger, and everyone is ignoring him, and he tries to talk to daryl, and daryl is like “fuck you, you think we’re BUDDIES?” and negan is like “oh, ok, so you’re gonna be like that too? fanfreakingtastic” and it’s very funny)

anyway. a fat monster zombie escapes its tarp at one point, and tries to eat some npc, and negan saves him, again is like “hey, anyone else realize that this is a FUCKING BAD PLAN?”, and everyone is like “we don’t care, you’re still shitty and we’re not listening to you, and you don’t actually care about random npc i would literally not be able to pick out in a lineup bc his face is so generic, you’re not the boss of us!!!”

it’s at this point that negan finally is like, “why am i even here? bc i know how to get around washington dc? do none of you have a map?” and i was like, “right?! that’s what i said!”

it’s then revealed that maggie only brought negan along to murder him under the guise of “oops, he got hurt in the line of duty, it wasn’t my fault,” and daryl has this look on his face that says, “i seriously need to stop hanging out with lethal women bent on revenge bc it’s gonna give me high blood pressure,” and maggie has a badass moment where she points a gun she has for some reason at negan and is like “i have like, one shred of human compassion left inside of me, and if you keep pushing me i will fucking kill you without a second thought, so shut the hell up”

(in her defense, negan had just dropped glenn’s name to purposely antagonize her, which was rude as hell)

(for the record, i’m completely on maggie’s side here, but negan still is right that trapping themselves in a metro station is a bad call)

anyway, moving away from that briefly

i think this jump cut happens sooner, i don’t actually remember, but whatever who cares, point is, we get to the part of the show that actually matters, and that’s anything involving my love, juanita “princess” sanchez

and also eugene, yumiko, and ezekiel

they are being asked increasingly invasive questions by commonwealth ppl, some of which i wish they actually would of answered (what do they use to wipe their asses with?? surely toilet paper has long since become extinct)

zeke, who is so much more tolerable as a character now that he’s not larping as a king, has this incredibly weird and sort of sexually charged moment with a dude in an orange stormtrooper costume, where he’s like, “i bet you were an asshole cop back before The Fall, you stupid fascist, #fuckthepolice, mb literally? idk, this moment has a lot of pent up aggression that could easily translate to hate sex, it might just be the intense eye contact, but w/e, let’s just move along,” and then he has a coughing fit to remind the audience that he’s currently dying of cancer, and orange stormtrooper is like “lolz, loser, drink some water you dumb piece of shit”

cut to the wholesome foursome sitting at a picnic table in a guarded courtyard eating gruel, and yumkio, who finally has a personality, and princess are like “hey, this place fucking sucks, can we leave?” and zeke is like, “yeah, i met this orange stormtrooper who i think might be dtf and/or murder, so we should probably bounce”

but eugene is like, “but i want some hot stephanie ass, and also some bullshit excuse about how mb commonewealth will save alexandria” which, they left before things went super downhill, right? idr. it was after hilltop fell, but they don’t know alexandria got fucked either, if i recall? w/e, not important

two seconds after he says this, they talk to some people who are like “we’ve been here for four months, or maybe it’s been nine, i don’t actually remember, i’ve stopped processing the passage of time,” and the wholesome foursome takes this as a bad sign, tho that’s just the life i’ve lived as a night worker during a pandemic, so i was like #mood

but then they watch some guy get dragged away screaming to get “reprocessed” and eugene is like “ok, nvm, let’s bounce”

(my theory on what “reprocessing” is, is that they’re stuck in a room and have to watch hours and hours of customer service training videos on vhs from the 90s)

i definitely got my jump cut scenes mixed up bc i think the negan accusing maggie of a murder plot thing happened in between this scene and then the next commonwealth scene, but w/e, i’ll just finish what happens in the commonwealth arch

the wholesome foursome are trying to hatch a plan to escape, except princess, my love, is distracted watching some stormtroopers flirt, and the other three are like “wtf, dude, how can you even tell any of them apart?” and princess then tells them every stormtroopers backstory bc she is brilliant and pays rly close attention to shit, and the other three are like, “this is useful information, thank you for being an insane person”

their plan involves yumiko and eugene dressing up as stormtroopers and leading princess and zeke out of the place, which works fine actually, except on their way out they come across the Depressing Wall of Probably Mostly Dead Missing Loved Ones

they’re about to leave, when princess is like, “wait, yumiko, you’re on here, that’s weird huh?”

sure enough, yumiko is on the wall, with a note from ig her sister

the scene ends with yumiko going, “guys...i can’t leave...i have tragic backstory to unveil”

tragic backstory to be continued ig

back in murder metro town, npc and some other npc have stolen all the supplies, there’s a train blocking the track, and a horde of walkers are coming towards them, so things are not going fantastic

they horde is too big to take down, so they start to climb on top of the train car to get away

but dog runs away!

and daryl, being every pet owner ever, is like “gotta go get my dog, guys, try not to get killed while i’m gone, c u soon!” and he ducks under the train and disappears

#priorities

the episode ends with maggie climbing up the train car but getting grabbed by a walker and dangling off the edge, and negan is there and they have a lion king moment where maggie is like, “scar! help me!” and negan is like “long live the king, bitch” and walks away into the shadows, leaving maggie to a potential death

which, while i know isn’t actually going to happen, would be a really fucking funny move on the writers’ part

like, “look, lauren’s back! and now she’s dead, bet you didn’t expect that!”

anyway

my assumption is negan will actually end up helping her up or something, continuing his ambiguous morality bullshit that actually isn’t ambiguous bc he BEAT GLENN TO DEATH WITH A FUCKING BAT WRAPPED IN BARBED WIRE IN FRONT OF HIS PREGNANT WIFE

the maggie/negan arch is kind of dumb, but whatevs, i’ll tolerate it, as long as my boy glenn gets justice in the end

anyway, cue credits!

final assessment: good episode. i’m much more interested in commonwealth than the reapers, tho i am hoping that daryl’s personality-less ex turns out to be a monster killing machine with no conscience, that’ll be fun. princess is a gift from god. hershel jr needs his own tv show. needs more carol (and caryl)

the end! going back into my walking dead free chamber! see you next episode!

-diz

#i didn't mean to recap the entire fucking episode lol #sorry #it's to make up for my lack of content lately #or something #anyway #caryl #twd s11ep1 #twd s11 spoilers #dunlap tp

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amphtaminedreams · 3 years

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Why Ethical Fashion Doesn’t Need to be Boring (In the Words of a Shopping Addict): Lookbook no.14

Hi to anyone reading,

Arghhhh.

I never know how to start posts when I literally just uploaded the other week because I tend to follow the very formulaic approach of summarising what I’ve missed due to sporadic posting…I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m still posting sporadically, it just so happens I’ve had more content to get up recently-sometimes lightning strikes twice, ya know, and I have a brief, if chemically fuelled, reprieve from the permanent state of exhaustion. It’s not like there isn’t stuff to talk about- the last month has seen a horrific murder and public outcry in response. There are a lot of important conversations going on about women’s safety and misogynistic violence that I really cannot do justice to in a paragraph and feelings that have been brewing for a long time that I can’t articulate yet and will not attempt to offhandedly do so in this post. Right now I just wanna say that I stand in solidarity with all those with histories of experiencing violence at the hands of men, those who aren’t here with us anymore as a result of that violence such as Sarah Everard, and those marginalised women whose stories don’t make national news. It’s very telling the way Sarah’s vigil was responded to by the same police force that have allowed mostly male anti-mask protests to go ahead with protestors unscathed, and solidarity with the women who were treated with such an unjustifiable amount of force at the vigil too.

That being said, women’s rights are something I wanted to talk about in this post, with regards to the way it ties into ethical fashion. None of us are perfect and it’s easy living in a first world country to detach yourself from the issues stemming from fast fashion, especially when you don’t have the time or money yourself to be selective about where you buy from. Don’t get me wrong, I do treat myself to some new clothes from fast fashion companies like ASOS and Urban Outfitters a few times a year so this is NOT coming from a place of preaching, but I have drastically reduced that to buying about 90% of my new clothes either second hand from Depop or charity shops or clothing stores that are upfront about their outsourcing practices. I love putting outfits together and updating my wardrobe and I don’t want to abandon that as a medium of self-expression because it does bring me joy, but to continue to update my wardrobe with the frequency I do by buying from fast fashion retailers on such a regular basis I accepted was going against the things I care about; around 80% of textile workers on poverty wages in developing countries are girls and women (opensocietyfoundations.org), and whilst fast fashion companies in the West continue to outsource manufacturing to said countries to cut costs and there is little regulation enforcing employers to pay women the same amount as men or even adhere to a minimum wage, they will continue to be forced into these roles where they are subjected to horrific working conditions, impossible production targets and frequent abuse (according to an article published in the Guardian in June 2018, 540 incidences of abuse, often of a sexual nature, were reported by women working in factories supplying the retailers GAP and H&M when they were interviewed on the subject). There is no denying that the fast fashion industry depends on and perpetuates the subjugation of women and systematically prevents them from making steps towards gender equality in their countries, be it through greater financial independence or the freedom to pursue higher education; the popular current practice by western fast fashion companies of outsourcing manufacturing to factories unhindered by workers rights and gender equality laws by association condones the sexual and physical violence that occurs as a means of punishment for not meeting targets, the exploitative pay which affords women little independence from husbands and families dominated by patriarchal values, and the long, exhausting hours which women have little choice but to take in order to avoid their contracts being terminated and to put food on the table. No, one individual completely abandoning fast fashion isn’t going to put an end to these unethical practices but if all of us make a conscious effort to reduce our consumption at least a little and make it clear why we’re doing so, we put greater pressure on fast fashion companies to act in a more responsible way. There isn’t going to be any kind of miraculous change of heart, so to force them to change we have to hit the industry and the people at the top who benefit from such practices where it really hurts: their profit.

SO, for this post I thought I would highlight some of my favourite more ethical online clothing companies to buy from; the more popular these more socially responsible brands become, the more apparent it becomes to fast fashion companies relying on an exploitative business model that how they treat their workers is of growing importance to consumers. It’s all very well and good Missguided and PLT talking about empowering women and making “girl boss” slogan tees but we need to make it clear that we’re aware of the hollowness of the gesture, and that we want less hypocritical talk and more action to actually enhance the lives of the women that work for them, not just the ones they show in their flashy offices on TV. I’ve included my favourite Depop shops too, because if you can shop second hand, that’s even better; though I like to treat myself to new clothes now and again, I’m aware that the impact the manufacturing process in general, whether or not the company acts in an ethical way with regards to their employment practices, has on the environment is more often than not detrimental. Depop has really been my saving grace this past year-if you know what you’re looking for and have the time and patience, you can find so many gems, and at this point the balance of my wardrobe is tipped firmly in the favour of the reuse and recycle approach to shopping. In the vein of reusing fashion, I thought I’d also include a mini lookbook for a cardigan I got from one of my favourite online retailers, The Ragged Priest, just as a reminder that 1). The best way to be sustainable is to rewear and 2). That with tweaks, one piece alone can give you multiple completely different outfits. Like honestly, outfit repeating doesn’t have to be a literal repeat. Sometimes it’s worth spending a little bit extra on something that looks good with everything, and making that investment into your ability to fool people that you’ve got your shit together by wearing something cool as fuck.

Quickly before I get into it, I’m aware that some ethical companies are a bit out of the average consumer’s price range, and so I wanted to sort them into price point categories which will work as follows:

£= most of their stock is £40 & under ££= most of their stock is between £40-£100 £££= most of their stock costs upwards of £100

Now, in no particular order (and starting with online retailers before moving onto Depop shops), here’s the list!

1. THE RAGGED PRIEST

PRICE POINT: ££

Using recycled fabric to construct their pieces where possible and releasing clothing in small drops designed to sell out rather than following the typical fast fashion model of outsourcing the production of vast amounts of clothing overseas, the Ragged Priest is my absolute favourite clothing brand out there. It’s *semi* affordable and because they are all about those bold, in your face, your-grandma-will-probs-think-it’s-ugly kinda pieces, just one can do SO much for your wardrobe.

I recently bought this cardigan from their The Simple Life drop and had so many outfit ideas for it that I thought I’d put a few of them together for this post just as an example of how you can take the same piece over and over again and still make it interesting, even when you don’t feel like straying too far from your personal style preferences. While we’re at it, I also wanted to use this mini lookbook to point out how fucking great Depop is! Literally everything in these outfits is from there apart from the shoes and the jewellery, the leather blazer on the right I bought a few years ago and then the top and skirt in the outfit from the far left which are both from Ebay. The shoes with that outfit are from Koi Vegan footwear-I didn’t include them in this list because I wanted to keep it consistent and focus on ethical clothing companies rather than retailers that focus on one specific thing such as shoes or jewellery, but they are my favourite place to buy shoes from and focus closely on ethical production too so definitely recommend.

2. MINGA LONDON

PRICE POINT: ££

Towards the lower end of the ££ price point, Minga is probably the closest you’re gonna get to an ethical version of the Dolls Kill Deliah’s range. Their focus on being a socially responsible business is a huge part of their ethos and their pieces are put together in Portugal, where they're based, by a small in-house team; the majority of their fabric is sourced from local Portuguese businesses and even more amazingly, they recycle the fabric of the pieces they don’t sell in new designs. They are just a generally amazing company and I wish more people knew about them because their pieces are fucking adorable and wouldn’t be out of place (or overpriced) in your local UO.

3. ELSIE & FRED

PRICE POINT: £

A small, black owned business set up by 3 siblings from Coventry, Elsie & Fred have earned themselves a reputation as a staple provider of the festival season wardrobe. Being an independently owned business, they have strict standards that their manufacturers must adhere to and a close working relationship with the owners of the two factories who oversee production in Guangzhou, China, to ensure fair wages and a safe working environment. On the environmental side of things, Elsie and Fred are working to incorporate recycled fabric into their designs as much as possible and have this year introduced compostable mailing bags.

4. HOUSE OF SUNNY

PRICE POINT: £££

Follow enough British instagram fashion influencers and you are bound to have heard of House of Sunny in 2020-snagging what is probably my all time favourite coat from there in 2019 before all the hype is a humble brag I will allow myself on the basis that I haven’t been able to afford anything since, lol. Along with kooky, one of a kind designs, being decidedly anti-fast fashion is a huge part of their branding; HoS only drop 2 collections of limited stock a year, thoroughly screen suppliers and on their website you can find a tonne of information on how they’re working to offset their environmental impact too. If you can treat yourself to a piece from there at any point, the quality of the garments truly make the price point worth it.

5. JADED LONDON

PRICE POINT: ££

Similarly to The Ragged Priest and House of Sunny, Jaded London go the route of dropping limited collections on a less frequent basis intending to sell out (particularly popular pieces are occasionally restocked) rather than needlessly manufacturing vast quantities of garments to flog for whatever they can get and cutting corners with fair employment practices to offset any losses. By employing independent staff in the manufacturing plants with which they liaise to ensure fair, dignified working conditions and also by working closely with charities such as the Trussel Trust and Stand Up to Racism, Jaded London demonstrates a level of commitment to corporate responsibility that set them apart from a lot of similar online retailers. They are at the top of their game when it comes to daring and experimental yet wearable pieces and so it’s cool that they recognise the need to conduct their business in a considerate way too.

6. THE HIPPIE SHAKE

PRICE POINT: ££

Owned by UK based bohemian queen Naomi Hession, the Hippie Shake is not only a great small independent business to support but is also the definition of slow fashion. With a limited number of opulent 70s style pieces, I have always wanted to purchase something from here. I’ve yet to do so but I’m gonna make it my mission eventually.

7. VINTAGE HEARTS

PRICE POINT: £

An affordable, gorgeous array of quirky handpicked vintage pieces that would probably take you forever to find in a charity shop or that you’d be charged a small fortune for if you found it in a high street second hand store, Vintage Hearts is where you should go if you want a timeless statement piece that may have otherwise ended up in a landfill. The added benefit of vintage clothing is that it is, by its nature, great for the environment, but you can also look fab and groovy as fuck as you do your bit for the planet<3

8. WE ARE COW

PRICE POINT: £

Offering both original vintage pieces and reworked pieces using recycled fabrics, We Are Cow has both basic branded second hand items but also handmade streetwear style original designs all for a fair price. You can tell that it’s all high quality stuff consistent with their modern, functional aesthetic and it’s clear that the team behind the shop has a real vision in mind when they’re designing.

9. OUT OF THE ORDINARY CLOTHING

PRICE POINT: £

In the words of Corrie Davis, founder of OOTO "I start with the belief that fashion will be always be worn differently by the individual that wears it. Every collection from Out of the Ordinary is different to the last but undeniably Out of the Ordinary. I champion flamboyancy and embrace the cultures I've experienced around the world, merging the two and creating popular style trends in exciting textiles, prints and techniques to bring to you something a little Out of the Ordinary." That pretty much sums up the vibrancy, vivacity and bold elegance of the brand’s aesthetic perfectly, which is reflected by Davis’ commitment to ethical manufacturing based on relationships forged between the founders and family artisans and the sourcing of fabrics from textile markets around the world. Everything you need for a boujie summer holiday in the Mediterranean-when leaving the country is finally allowed again, lol, EVERYBODY GET YOUR FUCKING VACCINE-is here.

10. WILD THING

PRICE POINT: ranges from £-£££ depending on the brand

Probs the closest thing you’ll get to an ethical ASOS, Wild Thing brings together a host of sustainable and independent clothing brands and puts them all in one place to present to us all a collection of the sickest festival style fashion out there. Whilst it’s super cool that this already exists and a slice of humble pie for myself to remind me that I am not in fact the revolutionary marketing genius I thought I was, I’m bummed to know that my idea of said ethical ASOS style website is already out there. Fingers crossed for the next grand money making scheme that comes to mind that I can use to distribute some wealth (yeah, there probably won’t be any because very few original thoughts enter my head, clearly, tehe) xoxo

11. SHOPFLUFFY

PRICE POINT: ££

I know it’s 2021 and we all kind hate the idea of girl boss feminism and the connotations of privilege and exploitation that come with it but can we bring it back when we’re talking about women who embody what it was actually all supposed to be about? Because the owner of ShopFluffy, @lulutrixabelle embodies everything good about the term. Somebody who genuinely does (cue Ramona singer voice here) empower other women through her celebration of powerful female friendship and free spirited sense of personal style that should inspire every one of us to wear whatever the fuck we want (clashing patterns and over-accessorising be damned), Lulu handmakes all the designs on her site and very much places an emphasis on slow fashion by releasing only a few collections a year which you can clearly tell a lot of painstaking effort and talent went into. ShopFluffy is on the pricier side but the adorable crocheted coords LuLu specialises in, reminiscent of carefree childhood days and picnics in meadows picturesque enough to be the backdrop of a Jacquemus runway presentation, are a bold and beautiful expression of playful femininity worthy of departing with a bit more than you’d usually spend. After all, if you are gonna spend that money on a piece of clothing, supporting an ethical, independent woman owned business clearly built on carefully honed skill, passion and authenticity is the way to go.

12. SHOPEASYTIGER

PRICE POINT: ££

It feels correct to follow up the ShopFluffy mention with ShopEasyTiger given the friendship between the former’s owner with Tigerlilly Winfield (is that not the most wonderfully storybook character sounding name of all time?), owner of Easy Tiger. Up there with my most revered style icons, Tigerlilly’s designs are as flamboyant and glamorous and daring and dramatic as her own personal style, and again, they are ethically made! If you want to get that psychedelic rock n’roll groupie that’s actually way cooler than the band itself kinda energy too, her shop is the place to start.

13. HOTTTRAMP

PRICE POINT: ££

Founded by the incredibly hot Belle_hott_tramp on Instagram, HottTramp is a collection of both handmade pieces and carefully selected vintage finds that blur the lines between 90s Courtney Love style grunge and 70s summer of love hippy that make me want to start my own all girl rock band and hire a camper van to paint black and road trip through the American desert. Given my complete lack of hand eye coordination, I’ll most likely never have the instrumental skills to do that but I never said it was a realistic fantasy, okay?

14. LAZY OAF

PRICE POINT: ££

Is it just me that always thought Lazy Oaf was within the same kind of price range as The Ragged Priest? Because it’s a lottt more expensive than I thought. That being said, if you’re going for a playful, toned down Molly Goddard kinda look, anything bright and youthful, Lazy Oaf’s clothes 100% fit that brief. You are paying more, but part of that markup is reflected in their transparency when it comes to their ethical code, which includes ensuring that statutory minimum wage laws are adhered to in the supply chain as well as that all workers are of the legal working age for their countries and that their working hours do not exceed the legal limit. They are also steadfastly committed to donating a portion of their profits to charities dedicated to improving mental wellbeing such as Mind, Rethink Mental Illness, and Young Minds, something that is hugely important to me given my own experiences and the line of work I want to go into.

15. NEVER FULLY DRESSED

PRICE POINT: ££

Similar in their aesthetic to Out of the Ordinary, Never Fully Dressed is big on colour, print, and elegance. They have both specially selected second hand pieces on offer and original designs too and the about us section of their website clearly states how passionate they are about their ethical manufacturing process, which takes place both here in the UK and in China.

16. TUNNEL VISION

PRICE POINT: ££

Offering the dreamiest, one of a kind vintage 90s pieces, Tunnel Vision could just as easily be a grunge girl band come the craft themed moodboard as it is an online retailer. If the 90s isn’t for you-I mean, I don’t wanna question anybody’s taste levels but…-they also have the option of shopping by era, which I think is a really cool feature I wish a lot of irl vintage shops would incorporate.

17. LOVE TOO TRUE

PRICE POINT: £

Everything on Love Too True is fucking gorgeousss and it is no surprise that they manufacture their garments here in London because I feel their brand totally encompasses that stereotypical 90s East End punk vibe perfectly with a shit tonne of chunky boots and show stopping plaid pieces that makes my heart ache for a riot grrrl renaissance. Yes, when it comes to feminism’s place in mainstream culture, making sure the political goals and structural changes we’re aiming for are visible to all is by far the most important, but let’s have a resurgence of the grunge girl’s armour along with that and PLEASE let’s leave athleisure in the 2010s. No more Kardashian nude leggings, I beg (I AM being lighthearted, wear whatever you want! We’re not policing women’s clothes in this neck of the woods).

18. NINE LIVES BAZAAR

PRICE POINT: £££

Eurgh. Nine Lives Bazaar. I want it ALL. Their clothes give me all the Etro, Zimmerman, Torey Burch, modernised Stevie Nicks vibes on a slightly more realistic budget, though unfortunately for me said budget just isn’t realistic enough. You would think pieces being ethically produced is just a given when it comes to clothes within this price range but that’s not necessarily the case and Nine Lives Bazaar is one of the ones you can trust to actually be considerate of their employees needs when it comes to their approach to business. To anybody who can afford to shop here, I am insanely jealous. The rest of us, for now, can just browse the website n feel the fantasy, channel a Valentina level of delusion and pretend it’s just the import taxes from Australia that’s holding us back from making a purchase.

-DEPOP SHOPS-

1. @HOUSE_OF_EROTIQUE

PRICE POINT: ££

Everything handmade and latex and form fitting to make you the baddest bitch in the room, I’ve got myself a few pieces from this shop over the past couple of years. Customer service is a bit hit or miss and there’s been times when I’ve had to wait a while for my purchases to get to me but because they’re all one of a kind and custom made to fit, it’s worth it, and when they have messed up they were kind enough to add something to my order for free.

2. @SACREDHAWK

PRICE POINT: ££

If you picture raiding the wardrobe of a biker gang, snatching the Coachella bound suitcases of the Revolve ambassadors at Palm Springs airport, and then jumbling all those clothes together, that’s probably your best bet at getting an idea of Sacred Hawk’s aesthetic. Formerly an ASOS concession, the brand is now available on Depop and is a collection of the most lavish glam grunge pieces, all vintage or reworked vintage. Some things are a bit on the pricey side but I would say they are all priced fairly considering how unique and ornate a lot of the pieces are, and I reeeeally wanna be able to say I own something from there one day.

3. @IDENTITYPARTY

PRICE POINT: £££

I struggled with how to categorise this Depop shop in terms of price point because although there are some fairly low-priced pieces, the standouts are the vintage coats which are understandably a lot more expensive-if you want to fully immerse yourself in the Almost Famous Penny Lane fantasy, you’re gonna have to fork out a little bit.

4. @RETRO_RAIL

PRICE POINT: £££

Retro_rail is of a similar vein to IdentityParty, in that the standout pieces are the vintage coats which are usually upwards of £100-if you’re looking for one-of-a-kind statement outerwear to invest in, I can’t recommend this shop enough. If you’re like me and you’re looking for something more within the £ to ££ price range, Retro Rail is still worth a browse as inspiration for the kind of styles you might wanna try and find elsewhere on Depop.

5. @5THSEASON

PRICE POINT: £

Most of the quirky vintage pieces you’ll find on offer on this Depop shop are within the £25 to £40 price range and though you’ve got coats similar to those you’ll find on Identity Party and Retro Rail and they are sill slightly more than the tops and trousers and dresses on sale etc., they are more modestly priced than the other 2 listed.

6. @DREAMERSREBELS

PRICE POINT: £££

Another v pricey one, dreamersrebels specialises in the daintiest, most whimsical 60s style co-ords I’ve ever seen. Handmade upon purchase, which in turn guarantees little textile waste, you can find the kind of pieces you’d expect to see on a 21st century incarnation of Audrey Hepburn, all the soft pastels and timeless, retro silhouettes you could possibly wish for. I mean, wishing is pretty much all I can do rn but anyone with a near minimum wage retail job knows you need something to aspire to, lol. I managed to budget enough to treat myself to a Selkie dress so I’m manifesting that same level of self-discipline to get me a dreamersrebels piece next.

7. @AWKWARDPHASE

PRICE POINT: £

Very affordable vintage pieces that range from cutesy mid-century style dresses and coats to grungy 90s jackets, perfectly styled and presented too in a way that will have you wanting to order something for yourself to replicate that modern spin on old staples and give them a second life.

8. @EVIEHALLOWS

PRICE POINT: £

Another Depop shop where the clothes are styled so well, it’ll have you thinking you can make anything from a floral 1950s housewife style cardigan to a lycra jumpsuit look very intentionally on trend.

9. @JAHOOLI

PRICE POINT: £

There’s also Jahooli, which I will just say ticks all the same boxes as the other two aforementioned stores to avoid repeating myself.

10. @LOVELYANDLOVELESS

PRICE POINT: £

In terms of price, I would put Lovely and Loveless into the same category as Jahooli, Awkward Phase and Evie Hallows, the difference being that the clothes available are more on the dainty, classically feminine side. People who have a Pinterest board dedicated to the cottagecore or light academia aesthetic (whew, the gen Z is showing), this one’s for you.

11. @CHLOESTJOHN

PRICE POINT: £

Finally, we have the ChloeStJohn Depop shop and it’s definitely a good one to end on; picture the wardrobe of Carrie Bradshaw if she’d lived in Camden instead of New York in the 90s and hung out with a slightly edgier crew than Charlotte, Miranda and Samantha and there you have it, the vibe of the pieces on offer. Does it belong to a girl who probs lives near Primrose Hill and has access to all the boujiest second hand clothes shops available which she most likely routinely raids to resell on Depop? Potentially, but hopefully not because I am very here for this whole red wine in one hand and a cigarette in another back when people were allowed to smoke inside bars aesthetic. I’m sorry that the gen Z part of me once again jumped out in such an aggressive fashion with that last sentence, but I know you know what I mean.

And that’s everything!

I did wanna close off the post with a reminder of how nuanced a discussion this is-having the time and money to be more conscious about your ethical footprint when you’re buying clothes is in itself a privilege; fashion shouldn’t be an interest reserved for only those who have the means to pay extra or spend time scouring the internet. It’s also important to be aware of the lack of size inclusivity-a lot of the “trendy” sustainable fashion brands tend to not stock anything larger than a size 14 and attempt to deflect attention away from this by categorising clothes as either XS, S, M, or L, which is in itself a bit of a pisstake considering that 12-14 is the average clothing size here for women in the UK, and so in no way large. Shopping from Depop and Ebay is hard too when so many brands fail to understand how to fit a non-straight size body which in turn necessitates trying stuff on before you buy it, something that isn’t possible when you’re shopping second hand. A lot of Depop shops fail to offer returns and even with those who do, chasing up that return can be a time-consuming and generally all round frustrating process.

Basically, when we’re having these kinds of discussions it’s important to consider everyone’s situations and avoid sitting on some kind of high horse. I feel like things have become even more complicated lately- with the recent closure of once popular high street stores such as Topshop and Miss Selfridge, it has got me thinking a lot about just how many people’s income here in the UK is dependent on fast fashion retailers too and their popularity. The job scarcity resulting from these kind of closures, which are often all that is available to a lot of people with the demands of the job market seemingly becoming more and more impossible each day even for those who have been in higher education, is clearly an issue when the kind of support you can expect from the government as someone out of work is so woefully inadequate and likely to become even more so as the conservatives push for further cuts to UC and PIP. The past year has really shown us just how shaky the ground that an intensely capitalist society stands on is and how quickly everything can go tits up when we don’t invest in a safety net for those who are struggling. People seem to have realised more than ever the extent to which those whose jobs we deem “low-skilled” are actually the backbone of society, and yet even here, whilst the situation may not be quite as desperate as it is elsewhere, we still haven’t seen pay rises that reflect that. Turns out all the clapping WAS an empty gesture, who’d have thought it (for fuck’s sake)? Fair wages really are a global issue that starts with paying people enough for them to comfortably live on and in time should lead to a shift in consciousness away from the concept of profit before everything else and towards an equal playing field for everyone, something we should take every opportunity to speak up about and demand from our “leaders”, however shit a job so many of those leaders do. It’s frustrating how the focus on making ethical purchasing choices is so often on the overconsumption of things that women historically are more actively interested in such as clothes and accessories and make up when the reality is that the wealth of every industry titan on this planet, NOT just the ones who dominate the fast fashion sphere, depends on them continuing to get away with exploiting people-we should be looking at how we can show our dissatisfaction in all areas. Maybe I’m perpetuating that with this post, since a lot of the online retailers I mentioned only sell women’s clothing, but that being said, I’m not about to do men’s work for them, lol-they should make the effort, if possible, to research into sustainable clothing alternatives too.

Anyway, that’s the end of this post! If you read to the end, thank you so much! If I’ve made any errors in my research or there are more sustainable clothing brands that I could’ve mentioned, feel free to inbox me them too, and I can add them to this post if Tumblr allows. It’s usually a little bitch when it comes to editing long posts but I’ll try my best:) Again, thanks for reading! And if you are, I hope you are safe and well!

Lauren x

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dykeseinfeld · 3 years

Note

u asked someone to remind you to post about your pjo dual protagonist thalia/bianca au and i am SO intrigued by this idea please say more

anon asked: hey queen hope your homework went good yesterday 🌸…now what were you saying about thalia and bianca 😳 ?

ok y’all i’m here...the moment almost none of y’all have been waiting for....bianca/thalia protagonists with alternating pov’s au

warning it’s kind of super long and may or may not read like a 2nd grader’s semi-coherent game of pretend so under the cut it goes!

so the main things you need to know about this au are 1. thalia survives and 2. annabeth’s + luke’s ages are a lil diff bc canon is my sandbox 3. i can’t decide if percy exists in this au or not (maybe y’all can help me decide?)

so the first book:

would start a few months after grover brought thalia (12), luke (13), and annabeth (10, not 7) to camp half blood. they were chased by monsters sent by hades on the way, and thalia almost didn’t survive, but ultimately she got lucky and managed to send a bolt of lightning through her spear for the first time and they made it into camp

it’s been some time so annabeth is happy as a clam in the athena cabin doing her 10-year-old-with-severe-mommy-issues thing and luke is actually pretty popular with the hermes cabin bc he actually Met Their Dad Holy Shit and also he’s getting pretty good with a sword

at the same time, thalia is alone in the zeus cabin. everyone has been freaking out bc they all saw the huge bolt of lightning that incinerated a couple hellhounds as they made their grand entrance and What The Fuck Child Of The Big Three???

she’s also further isolated because chiron will take her for private training sessions sometimes, since she is clearly really powerful already and also Hades Himself was trying to kill her (chiron told her the reason was the big three’s pledge not to have kids, and maybe about the great prophecy? if he tells her that then she’s sworn to secrecy)

once grover leaves on another protector assignment, thalia mostly hangs out with luke, and annabeth. luke + annabeth both will try to eat meals with her at the zeus table but annabeth doesn’t want to get in trouble and luke is genuinely making friends in the hermes cabin so thalia will feel bad sometimes and send him back

kronos, seeing this bitter isolated child of the big three’s dreams: it’s free real estate

MEANWHILE

hades is Pissed that thalia survived and zeus got to break their oath And get the glory of a prophecy child

so he sends someone to take bianca (12) and nico (10) out of the lotus hotel and casino a little early.

grover is still their protector, but since the Stirring hasn’t begun in earnest yet and hades is lowkey determined to keep them safe, they make it back to camp half blood with no escort/incident

bianca + nico are put into the hermes cabin, and luke kinda takes them under his wing bc while he’s not bitter he still needs therapy bc this 14 year old has never met a pre-teen he couldn’t try to parent

luke introduces nico and annabeth since they’re the same age and they become really good friends!! she Loves mythomagic and he thinks her dagger is super cool and they’re both just really excited about camp <3

bianca is more reserved and resistant to the whole thing, and she wanders around alone exploring and runs into thalia in the zeus cabin

at this first meeting they get into a bit of a fight bc bianca is still in shock/denial about the gods being real, but thalia at this point has zero patience for this

anyway after that and maybe another scuffle during capture the flag or something they hit it off and become best friends in the way girls can, especially bonding over how they’ve both had to take on raising annabeth and nico basically on their own at the age of 12

~QUEST TIME~

thalia is given a quest for [unspecific reason] and chooses bianca and luke, they go off leaving annabeth and nico frustrated at home

quest hijinks etc, bianca is trying to figure out her parentage + her weird mysterious powers? and thalia is arguing with luke because he’s settling into camp/hero life really well actually but she’s getting progressively angrier with the gods for trying to kill her and also keeps getting dreams from kronos and doesn’t get why he doesn’t seem to remember all of the shit that the gods have put him through

bianca + thalia have las-vegas-style-heart-to-hearts where thalia shares her tragic backstory about her mother and her brother and how hades tried to kill her and even about the great prophecy and how she’s trying on this quest bc of that and her dad but at the same time these dreams are making her suspicious that he might’ve been responsible for her mom’s death.

bianca then shares her own stuff, about how terrified she was being on her own with nico having to protect him but also not remembering most of her childhood and not remembering her parents or how she ended up in the care of this lawyer and just the absolute mindfuckery that her memories/past are

luke is asleep in those scenes i guess lol 🧍‍♂️

anyway eventually they finish their quest in this massive climactic battle where bianca discovers her powers in a huge-showy-”i’m the ghost prince”-way and is formally claimed by hades which thalia sees as this Massive Betrayal obviously and bianca is horrified too because she knows what hades did to thalia but at the same time she’s just so happy to finally understand at least part of her past

thalia just reaches a breaking point though because everyone around her just doesn’t understand her anger and just when she thought she had found another sympathetic person who understood what she was going through she joins hades??? no. no fucking way. kronos reveals that he’s the one who has been sending her dreams, prob by sending some messenger who he possesses or smthing and when he offers thalia the chance to join him? she does (dun dun dun)

main beats of the rest of the series:

thalia and bianca on opposite sides of the war training to be the prophecy child, they come together a Lot and have like melodramatic fight scenes where they talk out their anger and try to get the other to join them bc they don’t want to kill each other

luke is extremely conflicted/betrayed and there’s a titan’s curse moment prob towards the end of the third book where they’re fighting and thalia is trying to get her to go with him but here he actually does go to join her (gasp!!) and is evil for at least one book but his heart’s not in it and he goes back to the good side eventually

by the point of luke’s betrayal, annabeth and nico are growing and developing and old enough to go on quests w bianca and by the last book they’re a main trio of sorts and their hypothetical character development is already making me emotional

there’s just a lot of general sexiness with foils and inner conflicts and bianca doesn’t even want to be the prophecy child but she needs to for the fate of the world and bianca is so angry at thalia bc thalia is a daughter of zeus and could control her powers and is perfect and just meant to be the prophecy kid, not some daughter of hades who they didn’t even have a cabin for before

hm maybe by either the last or second-to-last book thalia + bianca are close to reconciling or at least their interests are aligned for the moment and they read the text of the prophecy together and things go Wild bc they both think “single choice shall end his days” either is about luke or nico and it turns up the gas to their fighting both of them care about both of them and yeah

and then i can’t decide if there’s romantic arcs at all but if there were it would go like this:

just a dash of thaluke where at first it was luke having a one-sided crush but thalia misses him a Lot after she goes to kronos and wonders if it’s that she misses him or if it’s something More until to get him to defect there’s like a melodramatic moment in the fight where thalia kisses him and they go off to be Evil Together but it ends bc luke doesn’t believe in the cause and only joined her in hopes of getting thalia back to his side

once luke leaves/is kicked out thalia realizes that she didn’t love luke she just wanted a family and also in the second half of the series she realizes she’s a lesbian as a parallel to her redemption arc

bianca meanwhile is unconcerned w romance until she has her botl-hoe-moment where within one book she 1. runs into the hunters on a quest and has a thing with zoe nightshade who tries to get her to join plus tells her about that time she met thalia, 2. she goes to calypso’s island and falls in love w her in the moonlight or w/e and has her what-if moment, and 3. when they meet up that book thalia somehow knew abt zoe + calypso and seems almost angrier abt them than the war?? weird bc bianca knows that thalia is Totally Straight right??

my main point is that bianca/thalia is our friends-to-enemies-to-lovers endgame thank you i will take my pulitzer now

#this series is like. if the titan's curse was 5 books long and also specifically catered to 9 year old me #which is very girlboss me <3 #bianca di angelo #thalia grace #thalianca #luke castellan #thaluke #(just a dash. a smidge. for spice.)#annabeth chase #nico di angelo #pjo #keratonin #anon #answered #she speaks

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fangirlovestuff · 4 years

Note

Hi! I love your work!! If you are free, can you do one where the reader, who is an actress, is rumored to be with someone else she worked with and Chris Evans actually starts believing it and they fight which leads to a break up? I'm sorry it's really dumb.

Rumor Has It

a/n - nonnie, your request isn’t dumb!!! it’s a very good request and tysm for asking it, i really hope this is what you wanted and i could do your request justice. also yes, the title is from the Adele song, i just couldn’t resist lol. enjoy!<3

Word Count: 1k

Warnings: angst, cursing

edit - this turned into a series🥰: part 2 part 3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were returning from set when you read the headline of the article and snorted. Seriously? Don't these people have anything better to do but speculate about coworkers "dating"?

Entering your house, you shut the door behind you, knowing Chris was already home. "Babe?" you called out, putting down your bag.

"Hey," you heard Chris say in the living room. He sounded off, maybe even angry. You frowned and came into the living room, plopping down on the couch next to him.

"You alright?" you asked, pouting slightly at his expression.

"I don't know," he shrugged.

"You don't… know?"

"I don't know. Is my girlfriend cheating on me?" he finally turned to look you in the eyes, his expression annoyed.

"Excuse me?" you said, your eyes widening in shock.

"You heard me," he grumbled and took his phone out of his pocket. He opened it and the first thing that popped up was the article you just saw, open on some pictures of you and your friend David getting lunch on set today.

You rolled your eyes. "Very funny, Chris."

"Is it though?" he said bitterly and raised his eyebrow.

"C'mon, you can't be serious about this," you chuckled and cupped his face with your hands. "You know I'm not dating him, right?"

"I dunno, this seems pretty compelling to me," he said coldly. "listen to this – 'the two stars met on set for their hit new show, and sources state they immediately hit it off. They've been rumored to be involved for quite a while, but new pictures from the set today—'"

"Alright, I've heard enough," you cut him off, "we're just friends, and we went to get lunch. Obviously, the press blew it up like they love to do so much. You know this," you squeezed his hand in yours.

"Well yeah, but is it true? I mean, did you two really hit it off? Are you dating now?"

"God, do you really believe that crap, Chris?" you stood up and started pacing, unable to contain your anger.

"What do you want me to do?" his voice rose, his frustration evident. "Every fucking day you're dating someone else, and it's never me. How long until that turns true?"

"Never! It's never gonna turn true Chris!" you were exasperated. "Now, are you going to trust me? Take my word on this?"

"Considering the fact that everyone else says something different than you, it's a pretty hard thing to do." His tone was lower now, eyes fuming, and jaw clenched.

"It shouldn't be!" you lashed out, "You don't know these people! But you know me!"

"Yes, I do. That's how I know how anyone would jump at the chance to be with you." He looked into your eyes and you stared right back, still angry. After a short pause, he spoke up again. "You didn't answer my question."

"No, Chris! The answer is an obvious no! I'm not fucking around, I'm not in love with my coworker, or whatever it is people are saying about me. It doesn't matter, because I'm with you, and that's how I wanna be. The fact that this stupid gossip means something to you tells me that you don't. If you actually wanted to be with me, you would listen."

"I do want to be with you!" he said, taking your hand in his, "I just don't want anyone stealing you away from me. And when you go out to lunch with David," he spat out the name, "maybe make sure you're not all over the fucking tabloids, and then we can avoid this argument and you can lunch with whoever you want."

"Green was never your fucking color, Chris. Especially when you refuse so adamantly to trust me."

"Look, we both do what we do. We know what it's like to be someone you're not. And sometimes, it feels like if you wanted to lie to me, you could, because you're just that good. And if I was David, I'd do everything I can to be with you. You know I love you, but you can't blame me for having a hard time trusting you," he said, frustrated.

"Oh my fucking god!" you yelled, "You're an actor too, Chris! And guess what, I still believe you! So yes, I can blame you for not trusting me, because if you actually loved me like you said you do, you'd trust me!" tears of hurt were streaming down your face now, the truth of your words sinking in.

"I'm done making excuses for you, and I'm done with you," you said, your voice cold and leveled, strong. Meanwhile, your heart shattered.

"Oh, really? Is it because you don’t love me, or is it because you love him?"

"None. And the fact that you can't get that through your thick skull tells me I'm making the right call."

You took a deep breath before walking away, picking up a bag and starting to stuff your clothes in it, your phone, everything you needed to take with you. God knows you're not coming back here again.

Chris didn't follow. Maybe he thought you just needed some time to relax, maybe he didn't want to stop you. You didn't care.

Wordlessly, you slipped out, your stuff with you, already calling your friend to let you crash at her place. You passed the living room entrance and saw Chris on the couch, Dodger in his lap, watching the TV. You could join them, whispered a voice in you, like you always do, and then it'll be okay.

But it won't. You couldn't be with someone who didn't trust you fully. You couldn't give your heart to someone who took the press more seriously than he did you. You couldn’t compromise your soul like that, not even for Chris. You went outside, slamming the door behind you. By the time Chris noticed, you were far enough from him to realize you did the right thing, the only thing you could do.

You walked away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i’m don’t love my writing in this one a hundred precent, but i really wanted to get it out because i know i’ve been taking forever with the requests, i really hope it was good anyways🥺 also this is very angsty but i’m posting a very fluffy headcanon soon (probs gonna queue it up today) so keep an eye out for that<3

Taglist: @horny-nd-bored @shannon124 @perfectlyharolds @wintersoldierslut @iceebabies @sleepingpapermouse @steverogerswasalwaysworthy @holtzkinnon @angelicl-y @stydia-4-ever @thatoneperson5000 @fangirlfree @kaitcordx25 @bequeening @steve-barry-damon-logan @itscrazycherryblossomcollection @hollandxmarvel @stargazingfangirl18 @readsreblogsfics @onetwo3000 @beritmetal @harrystylesholland @jazbot2000 @anobscurename @xxxtwilightaxelxxx

if you wanna join / be removed from this taglist, comment/message me! much love <3

#chris evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x you #chris evans x y/n #chris evans angst

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ronwae · 3 years

Text

childhood au

so i'll try to reconstruct what Ralphies life as a kid was

a few facts from the game that we know:

* is younger than Nicky ( if Nicky is about 28/27 i imagine Ralph to be about 25/24 ) meaning that if Nicky immigrated w his relatives as a young child Ralph was probably already born in the US.( this could be the reason why in ch.1 he talks about being a real newyorker and makes fun of mc about it)

* Was abused (probably for the entirety of his childhood) by his alcoholic mother

* His father left him ( he says :" he went to get a pack pf smokes one day and never came back" this gives me the feeling that he would be at least 5/6+ years when that happened.

* Got into street fights and probably lost since once again he says " beat me up as bad as the boys" meaning that he was THE VICTIM HELLOO??

* there is also a small dialogue in ch.1 where it's mentioned that he always skipped school and probs stopped going there pretty early

* it's obvious that he lived in some gutter idk how to rephrase this

* was always close to nicky from the early childhood " we were the closest"

* one memory that Nicky narrates to us is making paper boats for Ralph and letting them sail on rainy days

* in spite of this we are told that Nicky never showed Ralph much affection, for example when Nicky is being sweet to mc he replies with "i've never seen him act like this"

* and in another line he says " i don't need nobody to stick their neck out for me" so yeah, he's been left alone and neglected for a while

Actual Childhood

i will compare Ralph with Nicky throughout this whole text and make a point about being very different.

1. His relationship with his mother

As long as Nicky had part of a more loving(normal) mom, Ralph clearly was less lucky. Literally being on his own with an alcoholic. Which resulted in him feeling unloved and running from home and getting into gang stuff. By always being belittled and beat by his parent, this usually results with the person later in life having big problems with aggression, this explaining why he likes being a criminal and jokes about others dying( this being a possibility to release all that anger from his childhood).

At the same time another prominent characteristic of his is the thing where he always does what he's told. We see this when he says that "Nicky taught him this and that" and also in that scene where he & Floyd sign documents. And there Ralph was right about not wanting to sign the deed to the speakeasy, but under Floyds pressure he literally breaks in less than a second. I explained this behaviour not by being simply " weak of spirit" or simply a loser, but the desire for approval, recognition and literally being patted on the shoulder for doing good. Since he's never been shown any kind of affection, he desperately tries to subconsciously earn it.

I think i should also add that by Freud( hate on me but this guy made a few good points) a mans relationship with his partner corelates with his relationship with his mother ( vice versa for women), so it makes sense why Nicky - with a loving mom found his soulmate, and Ralph didn't. ( i assume that he never had a long term relationship ). ( this is my personal theory)

2. His relationship with his dad

none🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥

3. His relationship with Nicky

now this one is just a continuation of point 1.

I've always felt some part of jealousy for Nicky. Maybe he got into crime because he always wanted to be like Nicky and even talked about living in Nicky's mansion after he takes his role. Im sure that he love's Nicky and feels bad for betraying him, but i understand why he'd do that. Maybe he tried to subconsciously prove to himself that he can make his own decisions but that turned out... well... bad.

But i imagine them both having a really good relationship, good un their own way.

And that point where they both mentioned that Nicky tried to prevent Ralph from joining the mafia, if i put myself in his shoes i would take that not as a way to keep me safe but a way to keep me from succeeding or always remaining in Nicky's shadow.

okay now for the actual actual childhood headcanons

* I feel like Ralph would be actually a pretty smart child. Besides being curious i feel that he'd say smart,correct and deep thoughts and not even realise that.

* He'd still have problems spelling and understanding basic math:/

* lived admiring rich people on the covers of magazines or in the movies

* was pretty much of a loner as a child and didn't have many friend except Nicky

* while Nicky was the lively, active and charismatic one, Ralphie would be the quiet kid until 12/13 yrs

* that meaning that he would usually be made fun of or beaten by older kids

* i don't think he'd fight back much, not with bare hands at least

* in general i think he'd despise actual fights, more of a gun/knife guy

* disliked Nicky's dog, or any four legged animal ( doesn't hate them but doesn't love either)

* birds on the other hand

* they always gave him hope and the desire to just be free and escape his home and everyone he knew. the same with sailing, loved the idea of just leaving alone into the open ocean

* irrational fear of death

* if there is a living creature that he loves more that birds it would be butterflies

* but no one knows that since he's embarrassed to admit it

* would create many problems as a child

* starting with the basic running from school up to setting someones hair on fire with a lighter

* mentioning the lighter, tried smoking at about 14 but nearly choked to death because of his asthma

* and because of asthma i think there would be multiple times where he almost died

* as a kid probably lived near a garage and spent most of his free time watching men repairing cars

* car obsession phase

* even started drawing them at some point and got pretty good at mechanical drawings

* dreamed of becoming a racer

* once told that to a girl he liked in like grade 4 and almost died of pride when she applauded him for his ambitions

* and his ambitions were always high

* the second he'd see or hear about something grand or fancy he'd add it to his mental list of wishes

* made friends with some local old guy who was very sarcastic and nihilistic and literally based his personality on that

* would have to get around life on his own and by that i mean that he sew his own clothes, made his own food, when he got lost -spent hours walking around new york until he found his street without asking anyone for directions

* at some point picked up smoking because even though at first it was death threatening

* at about 16/17 totally found himself in the "wiseguy" persona and at this point there wasn't a returning point

* had a couple of girlfriends but dated them for a month at best

YES I LIKE PSYCHOLOGY YES I WANT TO BECOME A PSYCHIATRIST AND I LOVE CHARACTER ANALYSIS

#tatw #fictif #fictif tatw #two against the world #fictif ralph #nicky valentino #ralph della rosa #fictif nicky #tatw ralph della rosa #two against the world ralph #headcanon tatw #headcanons ralph della rosa #nyx hidra tatw #nyx hydra fictif #nyx hydra #ralph fictif #ralph headcanons

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worldsover · 4 years

Text

No More Drowning ft. Olivia Hye

length ✦ 7138

genres ✧ drunk hookup; outercourse; roommate!Olivia

✦✧✦✧✦✧

Perspiration deluges your white Taekwondo uniform. You make it fit loose so that it doesn’t stick to your skin. A refreshing breeze now annoys you as it whistles through your damn window that never sealed completely shut. At least you didn't need to turn on a fan today.

“Hey Captain,” you greet the commander of none. Hyejoo lies on a small blue couch, the only pristine spot in the living room. Her outfit suggests that there would be the usual cool air expected of the season but the fall is humid and stuck in the climate of a couple months past. It’s incredible that there is not a bead of sweat formed on her face. You study her and somehow she’s handsome in your eyes which is probably not a word others would use to describe the stunning woman reclining with her feet up.

“Wassup,” she says.

“You gonna-”

“Clean up? Yeah, yeah, lemme finish this round.”

Her face is welded to her screen though her eyes dart around maybe holding a hint of remorse at the clothes that litter the cramped living space and the dishes in the sink.

“I’m not an impostor! Ahhh!” Hyejoo shouts into the screen. Certainly none of her actions follow through on that guilt.

“How'd this even happen? You got pyjamas on the floor, shirts on the chairs. You a camgirl or something?"

"I'm a camgirl? I can see your tits dude.” Cover your pectoral cleavage in faux shame. ”Yo, I swear I just saw green-"

"And all these energy drinks? Come on Hyejoo, no way your heart lasts more than a year.”

“Wow, meanie.”

You look at your watch. “It’s like 9:40.”

“Shit, right, the marketing test.” Hyejoo’s fingers show no pretense that she’ll stop playing. She definitely didn't see your disapproving face. “Oh relax, I still got time,” she says anyway.

Finally, she looks up at you and her brows crease. “What?” you ask.

"You look good today."

Your heart floats just a little. You always appreciate the little compliments she gives. They were just ones that friends, good friends, would say but you’ll take anything to keep you going. Well, it’s enough to get you to clean up for her again.

“It’s gonna be a long shower by the way.” She giggles and you step over empty cans and bottles when you walk to the bathroom.

“No prob, I’m heading out soon,” Hyejoo says.

“Sure you are.”

Her exaggerated yawn seems not so exaggerated by how she stretches her entire being before putting her phone away.

“Oh, soon means now. How long’s it going to take?” you say.

She shrugs her shoulders. “One, two? I dunno.”

In a rush to get all her supplies in her bag, a series of metallic clangs sound out when finished beverages fall over like dominoes.

“Fuck. I’m so sorry about that, I really am. I can buy you lunch if you want something?” Hyejoo starts picking up a few of them to set aside in the corner and you help her.

“Nah, I’ll still be in the shower by then.”

Hyejoo scoffs. “If I'm addicted to caffeine, you're addicted to water. A sandwich sound good?”

“Yeah sure. I got a lot on my mind, Captain.”

“That include me?” A dismissive puff of air exits your lips. No, no way. She walks up to smell your uniform. Your acute awareness of her distance or lack thereof causes you to ignore her pupils' subtle drift downwards.

“You’re a weirdo, you know that?”

"Get to your shower stinky."

You wave Hyejoo off then enter the bathroom. The scurry of little steps and a slam from the front door echo the whole apartment. Never any privacy in here. These sounds give way to the jet engine of your shower with its pressure betraying the bargain rate of your rent. Soap washes away your muscles' ache and the sun’s beating on your skin. It's been unusually warm since the leaves turned brown. Water builds up in the tub.

Something's not adding up. There it is again. That plunging in your heart. Sparring always helps a bit after your early morning manual labor carrying bags of sand. However, it does not stop the resurfacing of your every mistake as there's nothing but your mind in the shower. You don't have a plan and your future is void because money and work hours kill you as much as school. You're not even getting all the wages you earn and there's nothing you can do about it. Past choices bubble up in that unkind way. The cup fills and clear blue liquid engulfs you.

Lift yourself out the tub to catch a breath that you don't deserve. Deliberate respirations do nothing to slow down your heart rate. The only thing that can is a captain. You could wander the ocean on a raft with her alone but you have no idea if she felt even close to the same. Maybe she's just the most important friend you've ever had. Light from the small window hits the tiled floor. Unplug the drain. Right, you left your clothes in your room so wrap yourself with a green towel you find hanging from the doorknob.

Shit! There's not a mouse in sight but you shriek like there is one when Hyejoo materializes in the confined kitchen. Hyejoo expresses no surprise herself as she sits cross legged on the miniature wooden dining table playing yet another mobile game. Laundry baskets and garbage bags hold all the previous mess. Your surprise at her appearance transforms into surprise for her proactiveness. You want to give her thanks but no words escape your lips.

"You gonna put on some clothes? Perv. That’s my towel too."

Your hands push off invisible blame. The hands of the wall clock reads five minutes before noon. "Woah, woah, wait a sec. What happened to the midterm?"

"Walked out in the middle of it. Couldn’t deal. Dropped."

"Wait, what about the refund?"

"Sunk cost dude.” Hyejoo sniffs a wide white shirt hanging from a chair next to her. “This yours or mine? Ehh, it's clean either way."

You catch the shirt and smell it. A little vanilla. It's hers. “Thanks Captain.”

“Even sniffing it? Really a perv.” You almost forget a single piece of fabric separates full exposure of your genitals but the realization makes you blush anyway.

“Nah, you smelled it first and. Whoever smelt it, dealt it.”

“That’s not what that saying means.” Hyejoo gets up from her awkward seat.

Incredible how many new ways she can throw you off like when she bumps into you with her eyes are still on her phone. Hyejoo's clumsiness will be your death as the towel slips down and hangs solely from your half erect dick. Cool, you're just a clothing rack now. She turns you around with one hand and snatches the large shirt with the other. Your bare moon is in full view.

"You gonna put this on or just stand there?" she says with no qualms about the absurd sight of your newly cleansed rear. You scramble to wrap the towel tightly around you to tame your erection but there's no way she hasn't noticed by now.

"Y- yep, I, I will do that, for sure." Turn back around and take the shirt to put it on carefully. It’d be oversized for her but it fits you snug. Your ears must have joined your cheek’s redness because your nipples poke through the thin white fabric.

Hyejoo takes a single glance away from her screen at your makeshift towel skirt and laughs. "Actually, you look cute like that. Just keep the towel on, it's less to clean."

Wide-eyed, you say, "What if ahjumma barges in?"

"What if? Whatever, no fun." She sticks her tongue out then gets comfortable on the couch while her diligent and nimble fingers peck at the screen.

Return to the restroom and deal with your erection before it becomes a problem. You’ve seen hints of her comely body before and it helps you undress her layered attire in your imagination. Instead of the black button-up long sleeve and track pants she wore just moments ago, you picture a crop top, her hair tied up and white panties, and it's that latter image that affixes to your mind. On a particularly balmy day, Hyejoo wore only her underwear because she had nothing else to do but game and it hasn't stopped plaguing your fantasies ever since. Your hands are Hyejoo’s, soft and loving just for a moment.

"You taking another shower in there or what?" Hyejoo shouts, “I’d definitely hear from here!”

Reality smacks you in the face. She had no fear of you, no worry that you’d take advantage of her. Were you even a man? Stop your jerking and get up.

Open the bathroom door absentmindedly and thump. It smacks her head. You don’t even think about why she was standing right next to the door, instead sweeping aside her hair from her face. Red doesn’t come from where you hit her.

Simultaneously, you and Hyejoo say, “You okay?”

“Um, I’m, look-”

Her blush grows but she interrupts your blabbering, “I didn’t hear you respond and thought you, uh, died in there or something.”

Nearly reached la petite mort if that counted but instead you say, “No, I just. Had a lot to consider.”

“Sure.” You’ve never seen her this flustered since it’s enough for her to scurry back to her room. Hopefully things wouldn’t be too awkward.

✦✧✦✧✦✧

“I fucking hate you!” Hyejoo yells.

“Oh yeah? Same!” you retort, probably too loud.

Her tone goes down. “Were those the lines?”

“Ehh, as long as we get the gist of the argument down.”

Hyejoo and you stand on the stairway up to your rooftop apartment in your rehearsed spots. She looks a little confused on how to start what she wants to start but you poke at her when you see the landlady walking towards the stairs.

“Chill out!” she yelps.

“Chill out, you’re telling me to chill out?"

"Seriously, oppa," that's about as strained as a human can say a word, "You’re such a slob!”

“Shut up, look at me straight in the eyes and tell me you’re not just as bad,” you say, trying not to laugh but Hyejoo’s punch knocks the wind out of you. Your pain is only half acting. Her sympathetic look does nothing to soothe you.

"Ya!" The elderly woman interrupts and forces you two apart. “That’s enough! I get you’re cousins but even I don’t fight this badly with my family.”

Hyejoo whips her pupils towards you as though to ask the same question you had, if you sold the illusion too hard.

“I get that living with your kin is tough but at the very least, no murders on my property. Not until one of you graduates.” The old lady squints and turns to each of you saying, “Promise me. No hitting. Not in my sight.”

You nod then Hyejoo’s sigh becomes an assenting nod when the landlady smacks her wrist nearly black and blue. Satisfied at her hard work reconciling family matters, she walks back down her stairs to do her usual wandering around the neighborhood. Hyejoo and you take a second to stretch and relax.

“Ha. Do as I say, not as I do,” Hyejoo says as you both sit on the concrete steps.

You caress your tender rib. “Or don't do at all. Ow. You wanna be a Youtuber? They do boxing and gaming, and you'd kill doing both." Hyejoo's laugh is rich and all that it takes for you to forgive her. You exhale. "Hopefully that gets her off our backs for a while.”

“How do you even manage Taekwondo? You’re so fragile and-" Her sentence is interrupted when she looks at your built arms.

"No way they hit as hard as you, Captain." You miss her carnal look when you close your eyes and think about the nickname that you aimlessly threw out one day.

She stands up. Your eyes violently spread open at her “Kya!” Hyejoo’s fighting stance and shouts masquerading kihaps are totally off. As much as Hyejoo could kill you, a Taekwondo fighter since your childhood, she could also be incredibly cute too.

You tsk. "All that power and no technique."

Hyejoo sits back down none the more ashamed and scratches her head. "You think it would’ve been easier if we came clean?”

“Ahjumma could never allow two strangers to live co-ed. No way. I’m still surprised you came up with that so quickly.”

“It just came out so naturally, oppa!” she says in a deriding high pitch. “Yeah right I ever call you that again.”

Ring ring. You answer the call and Hyejoo's quizzical stare turns concerned at your breathlessness from the words that drill into your ear. They slam, they crash and their volume could break your eardrums even though they’re said as calmly as possible. The hole in your raft grows bigger and leaks more so even when you reach the abandoned shore, you're marooned.

"Fuck, fuck, god."

Sprint for the next bus. Pay no heed to the girl chasing you. Dammit, this can't be happening. Every problem gets fucking magnified because you can't have anything good and if you did, never could it last for more than a goddamn millisecond. You embark on the most anxious ride of your life even though you already know exactly what's going to happen. Transfer buses. The skyscrapers hover over you and gloat about how you’ll never enter their doors. Asphalt and glass swelter you when they reflect radiation down the sky. Your skin hurts. You get off the bus and arrive at the headquarters of the construction company. At the front of the building stands your boss.

Slap. "Did you not get the message? Were you under a tunnel?"

You get on your knees and bow. "Sir, I'm sorry."

"No one else is going to hire a goddamn delinquent like you."

"Please. I thought you understood." You nearly prostrate yourself

"I have no idea what you're talking about. There's a lot of assault on your record."

You stop yourself from blurting out that you fucking know. Defending yourself from bullies is assault? He already knew this was bullshit since that's why he hired you in the first place but now he's backtracking like a rat.

"I'll do anything to work here." He shakes his head while you hold back a tear. "Please. Just. Just tell me why?"

"You got greedy."

"Greedy?" You raise your head and then your tone. "Getting paid for the work that I do is greed?"

"You're on your knees and wanna talk back? Get out."

Bang. A closing door. Your head slumps back down and not a single person on the bus would misunderstand your emotions. You take the longest way home, unsure if you even deserve to go back. Any time, you could give up. Ponder your choices. Never going to get a job again. Never going to school. Never will have a chance to learn or a chance to improve. Never going to have money and never will have a place to live. Never going to see Hyejoo again. You have to give up.

One missed phone call from your polar opposite. She can do so much better. The longest way home turns longer when it goes straight to the sea as you decide to live life as a fisherman with your uncles. You were always invited. You wasted your time in the city. There's no stress here.

✦✧✦✧✦✧

There's no happiness either. Weeks passed even though only days passed. That’s life on the water. Everything spins. Fortunately, you manage to keep your stomach in not wanting to inconvenience the bus driver, the only other person in the vehicle.

You look at your watch as you near Hyejoo's home. She must be asleep by now but you carry each foot heavily when you walk up the steps anyway. Apologies, excuses and petitions that you wrote in your head blank away when you open the door when you see a woman asleep on the couch with earbuds on. Her unconscious head bounces to a slow rhythm. Your lungs fail your mouth's movements to form words because of all that creamy skin covered only by a green towel that creates an outline of her captivating curves. Hyejoo's legs beg to be licked and her collarbones direct your gaze to the bulging flesh poking from the top of the towel with her nipples an inch from your sight. Any other day and you’d ravage her on the spot. Stupid brain tells you to leave and stupid you follows.

You're outside when you hear Hyejoo say, "Hey! Motherfucker, where'd you go you son of a bitch?"

She steps out with no regard to her state of dress and you spin around watching for any witness. You notice her hold back when she hits you but her consecutive punches send a message anyway as each strike punctuates her words, "What, makes you think, you can worry me, like that?"

"Woah, you should. You should get back inside your house," your voice breaks and you back away.

"Hold on now, you're really about to go? Like this?" Hyejoo says.

"You. You look busy. I have to go."

"I'm sorry, I was just messing around with you. Come on, you're really telling me-" She notices your tumultuous expression and sighs. “Fuck it, we'll worry about it tomorrow. First of all, come in. With me. Into our home.”

You follow her into her apartment. She quickly returns from her room in a simple white tee and red gym shorts revealing the supple shape of her ass.

“I'm not gonna ask, okay? Tell you what. When you have a problem, the only answer is late night soju, beer and?” she says.

“Chicken, it’s gotta be. Come on, I see the bones right there.” You point to the countertop dishes. “I’m surprised this place isn’t messier."

"I can handle myself, thank you very much. And that. That was leftover, dry, sober chicken. We're going to munch down on that good crispy skin and we're doing it goddamn wasted." You can't help but match her smile, more radiant and genuine than yours.

Hyejoo pulls out all the alcohol from the small fridge while you call for delivery before both of you step outside the home. It’s night but the heat would make you believe the moon disguises the sun with how it shines on the green roof. What a weird fall. Only the trees remind you of the season. A short plastic table as the only furniture easily moved outside means that you’d have to sit close together on the floor, not that you minded.

Her silence confuses you but she becomes her usual self after you both down glasses of mixed beer and soju and especially after she sees the delivery man bringing an absurd amount of plastic bags for two people.

“Let’s. Go!” she shouts sloppily.

The poor worker looks at you so you give him a knowing nod and point to the beer and soju cans strewn about. His thumbs up as he walks away beguiles you. You look at Hyejoo and realize all the cleavage she’s showing with the shirt she chose. It's as revealing as the towel she wore earlier. Did she not put on a bra? Stand up quickly and search for the guy but his motorcycle revs and he’s already out of sight. That fucker probably saw something he shouldn’t have. You’re never gonna order from that chicken spot again. You bite angrily into the spicy crispy wing. Alright, maybe you just won’t order at this hour or whenever that dude works. Hyejoo chows down with drumsticks on each hand and it’s clear she’s responsible for a majority of the finished carcasses. The stains on her shirt would not make her look any less goddamn cute.

“Cheers!” Glasses clink. How many drinks, how many, burp, were you down? She burps too, you burp together. It’s funny. There was a lot of conversation but it slips you.

"I said I wouldn't talk about it, but Doyun and Michael, worried sick. They came here, everything.” Hyejoo garbles her words.

"Just ‘cause I don't show up to the club for a few days?"

"I'm telling you, a lot of people care. For you. I know I do."

It’s been a while since you started your little escape. All the food’s gone. You’re more sober now. You swear. The nighttime is so comfortable that Hyejoo brings out her blanket to lay on, along with a spoon and a watermelon.

"You're gonna have to wash this later," you say.

“Alright fine. Don't. Don’t rest yourself besides a pretty lady.“ Stab. ”On a perfect starry night.” Stab. “And don’t have some of this delicious watermelon."

One more stab at the watermelon she splits it open. Her devilish look suggests she might do the same to your rib cage if you don’t acquiesce. Lie down next to Hyejoo on the flimsy layer of cloth. You share pieces of the fruit and notice water spilling down her mouth. Definitely sober by now. She’s maybe half a meter away.

"Starry's a strong word to use.” You twirl your finger at the scarce lights in the black backdrop. “Lady too with the way you eat-" She playfully covers your mouth and flicks your forehead.

You don't know when your laughter and banter slow down, or when you start inching closer to her. It doesn't matter.

“Fishing is boring. They make it look all dramatic on shows and you’re just waiting. The night sky’s much clearer though.”

“You gotta. When you do something like that, gotta lemme join in at least.”

“You’re really fine on going on a trip with a man, alone, faraway on the sea?”

“If it’s you.”

“I don’t count, not much of a man at all. I just run away from shit and-”

"Shhh,” she shushes you loudly. “You can count on me.” Hyejoo says and you don’t let her voice project into empty space.

“I will.” It sounds a little forced from you.

“You will,“ she sounds so sure of herself, ”you’ll be okay.”

Your head lays in her neck. A finger in a cup, breaking surface tension so a drop escapes past the rim. You have no outdated sentiments on displaying emotion but you held back often pretending your tenacity was as strong as your body. Not this time. Your cup overflows.

Only moonlight refracts on your tears and Hyejoo wipes them away. You have no idea what she’s thinking as she gazes into the few stars visible in the city. Turn on your side and Hyejoo does likewise to face you then puts a couple of fingers in your hair. Cup her face in return and it wears many emotions, such as impishness, meekness at a few times, and an often impenetrable focus, but above all it’s the standard for beauty in how it assumes no blemish. Her triangle mouth is distinct, welcoming, but you hesitate. Her minute sugary fragrance overwhelms the variety of smells in the air. Crickets and distant occasional traffic. Hyejoo’s head tilts forward then places her lips light on yours and your world is silent. Your heart’s pulse slows so it doesn't interrupt.

“Captain,” you exhale out when she finally retreats her mouth. The name sounds ridiculous in this setting. “Ma’am?”

“Whatever sounds right to you,” she yields, though the subdued caresses on the definition of your arms, and less subtle grabs on your black shirt, convey that she’s in charge even if it’s a gentle direction. "Just Hyejoo is fine."

It's like she’s teaching you how to spar for the first time though neither of you are virgins. Hyejoo gives another kiss then turns you recumbent. You could not and would not stop her now especially when she straddles your denim covered thighs. Take off your shirt and her hands rush to aid you.

“But I’d prefer we don’t think at all.” Is she drooling?

“That’s what got me into trouble. Thoughtlessness.” Your eyes somehow wander away from the woman and her sumptuous yet clothed ass grinding on you.

“What do you think of me?

“Huh?” you say and your eyes snap back to her.

The underside of her shorts warm your groin. “I said, what do you think of me?”

“I think, ugh,” her weight striking a sensitivity in your pants makes you moan, “I think, you’re the most beautiful woman I know.”

“What a player. Well, that’s all you need to think.” Hyejoo rocks back and forth. “Fuck, this is going to be good.”

Lay your hands on her hips and Hyejoo takes your right one, lifting herself just enough to let your dick breathe.

“Why do you need that hand?” you say.

“Feel this.” She takes your hand to knead the thin cloth under her mound and you feel just the tiniest hint of moisture build on your palm.

Pull away to take a base whiff of your slippery fingers. It’ll be a new addiction. The smell of alcohol and the most delicious fried chicken in the world couldn’t compare.

"It's been like this around you since the day we met." Hyejoo bends down and etches every word of the confession into your eardrums, her tone even raspier. "This is all for you."

“Really?” You give her a peck and it turns frisky when tongues join the mix and teeth nibble at lips.

“Mhm.” Her lips vibrate on yours. Hyejoo gropes your crotch over your jeans. “I know it's going to be perfect.” She unzips and pulls down your pants to your knees. You take them off your legs completely and she searches for your wallet.

"I just lost my job and you're gonna rob me?" She breaks her serious character with a snicker. You sniffle and your mood lightens, “And how’d you know I had a condom in there?”

“Just had a feeling.” She winks.

Not an implausible cold reading but you can't count out the possibility of her snooping through your personal effects. You don't mind her proclivities this time. Hyejoo traces your every muscle’s curve with her index and middle finger and focuses especially around your pecs.

“I have to concede. I love these muscles of yours. Ever since that first day I met you at the open house. Maybe I’m just a simple woman.”

“Simplicity is sophistication.” Her fingers draw a line down your torso.

"Indeed. But I'm most interested in this hunk of meat right," she frees your cock from its confines, "Here." Hyejoo licks her lips.

“How is it?”

You’re already hard but Hyejoo's hands deftly work your shaft stiffer. “It’s so thick and this vein right here. It’ll hit just right.”

"Fuck, Hyejoo," you utter when she spits a little on your cock before she unrolls the condom on your erection. Hyejoo slips aside her shorts.

You don't get a view of her pussy with how she sprawls herself on top of you, but the slickness of her lips and the warmth that she emanates from between her legs immerses your senses enough. The missionary with her on top lets her control by the way she guides your cock and presses down on you.

“Oh god, I was right, fuuck,” Hyejoo proclaims when she sinks herself carefully into you and, on the next bounce, smacks her butt right into your waist. Her snugness clenches and quakes on your cock. Willowy arms share a similar hold of your body when she embraces you. You need her as badly as she needs you. You take heavy breaths, especially through your nose. Even her sweat is so alluring. The velvet texture that surrounds you keeps taut on your dick no matter how forcefully she rides herself on top of you. Squelches and quiet moans to a higher power pepper the warm night air.

Hyejoo removes her shirt and slings it away before bowing back down to lick your ears "God, your tits are perfect," you say even though your hands squeeze her buttcheeks in time to her thrusts. Her perky breasts recoil back and forth as they rub your chest while hard nipples juxtapose their softness.

No chance someone would come up to this little rooftop at this hour or have a good view though your cheeks flush at the thought. What if you had extra chicken coming? Or what if the landlady decided to check in on you two late at night? What if-

Hyejoo nudges her forehead against yours. She knows your habits. Your worried face is too familiar for her not to react so she nuzzles your neck and surrounds you with kisses.

Her husky voice vibrates your whole face. "Just focus on me." She makes out with you before her tongue dips into every crevice of your face the same way your cock does in her pink pussy.

Your dick slips out for a second and you take the time to admire her beauty and your fortune.

“Telling me not to drown and you’re going to inundate me,” you say in between her smooches, "With all these kisses."

“Well. Mwah.” Another peck. "You're so delectable.”

“So I’m just chicken to you then.” This deep kiss is probably to shut you up. You’re fine with that.

Regret on her mouth that she pulls away from you. One of you rips off her shorts, the last piece of clothing obstructing you two from total symmetry. Who cares who sees. You’re both fully naked with not a woe for the surrounding world. Delicate hands splayed across your upper body grasp tightly and again, your pecs get particular attention while she fondles your nipples.

She adjusts her back straight up and now she’s on her knees seated on your erection. The cowgirl stance allows her to find a new cusp of your cock head inside her. Hyejoo gyrates on you and you notice the understated lubrication of her pussy begins to overpower everything else in existence. Her musk vaguely reminds you of the ocean while its pheromones have you just as wobbly. It’s enough that, even though you're on your back, you have to hold her waist to avoid keeling over. Nails dig into your chest.

“God, yes, you, your cock, everything, just fuck into me.”

Hyejoo relaxes her body weight and relinquishes the rhythm to you. Pick up a new wind in your sails when you hear her gasp as you pinch her nipples. The momentum has you use all your stamina as though your rigorous fitness had one culminating purpose. You would make Hyejoo cum with only your cock. Rotate and circle your pelvis in pursuit of her most tender spot and an uncharacteristic high pitched wail confirms the location of the treasure. It’s difficult holding yourself up to reach the sensitive wall but she realizes your shared interest.

“That’s, that’s the spot. When I touch myself and think of you, it’s right there, fuck, it’s right there.” There’s no speed or power in your movement, only deliberate jabs and graceful nudges at the softest flesh. Sure it’s work, but damn did you get paid for it since she somehow sops even more between her thighs. Truly the reciprocating delight of friction and silkiness on your dick’s tip is worth it. Your name mixes profanities and wet slapping noises as Hyejoo bucks her hips in climax. Prized juices cascade all over your lap. Her highest vocalizations pierce your ears and her pussy tries its best to milk you but Hyejoo keeps as still as she can to hold your cock’s ideal positioning. Smear the fluids that coat her thighs slick with your hands and lick at your fingers, thirsty like you’re stranded.

Those thighs, by smothering your cock and removing your condom, soothe the pangs of when you pull out. Hyejoo is still in her cowgirl position reeling from her climax and her contorted face is yet more polished than any art you’ve consumed.

Seize the opportunity. Bend your dick forward. The topside of your shaft now rubs on her well-formed ass cheeks, moisturized by the wetness on your cock. Its cradle is different from her pussy's with perfect round cushions in her buns and a tight asshole that greets and tempts your shaft every time you thrust. It’s a siren call you’d have to answer another day. Fucking her bare buttcheeks satisfies you plenty enough.

She lifts up to let your erection return to its idle upward stance and you fuck her thighs in response. Her labia gnaws away at the bottom of your shaft and it begs you to shove it back in especially with how its liquor intoxicates your dick. You don’t forfeit, already overwhelmed by the thickness of her legs and her saliva dribbling from her mouth to help her juices. Hyejoo squirms as you repeat fucking her ass cheeks and fucking her thighs, and it makes the both of you feel heady. Alcohol and lack of sleep would probably do that too.

“Please. Hyejoo,” you implore, flexing your cock to scrape by her pussy lips.

“You want to?” She teases your bare tip but even just the spread of her satin pink on your head makes you shoot just a little. “I. I dunno.”

“Can we?”

“No.” You regret your loud sigh and feel selfish since you already had more satisfaction than one man could ever experience in his life. ”No, not no. No, as in no thinking.”

Plunge back into her wetness. Your cycle in and out continues with you eager to make her climax a second time. Maybe it’s the third time? The only thing you can recall is that this round, you can feel every corner of her pussy on your shaft tensing and relaxing without the latex protection. All of everything is a blur. Hyejoo could be clutching and ogling your muscles. She might be kissing your neck or maybe she’s bobbing up and down to show off her tits and her tummy. God, that midriff would look perfect coated in your cum. You could live forever with Hyejoo mounted on your cock and riding. A ringtone interrupts forever once again. It’s from that number. What was that number? Fuck it, no thinking. Her bouncing tits hypnotize you away from substantiality.

She snaps her fingers. “Hey! Hey. This is, fuck that feels so good, god your cock is just right. Ah fuck, I really think you should answer that.” You take an eternity to slow your boat. Hyejoo points to your phone on the table next to you. Work. She’s right. Both of you take a second to stabilize your breathing. Try to push her off but she refuses, shifting her mass onto your lap and keeping her pussy’s hold tight and warm on you.

“Really?” You groan, “You’re the one who told me to answer it.”

“It’s so late and they haven’t stopped calling.” She rests her head on your chest and yawns. “Your cock is sooo big in me. Don’t even need to move.”

Channel your practice silently jerking off to keep your cool though years of doing that couldn’t prepare you for this. Your hands certainly tried but never could imitate her pussy’s plush tightness. Really wish you didn’t have to but finally, you answer your phone after minutes of ringing. The voice on the other side mumbles a greeting. Didn’t expect to hear him. “Joonho. Why the fuck are you calling now?”

“It’s me! Joonho.”

“Yeah, I know. The hell you calling for?”

“Now that’s no way to speak to your boss, is it?”

“Huh?”

“I said that’s no way to speak.”

“I got that!”

“Hyung. That asshole, management fired him.”

“You telling me-”

“Yeah, they caught him stealing.”

“How the fuck?”

“Dude got too big for his britches and aimed up with his theft too. Mr. Son really didn’t like that shit.”

You cheer in your head. It wakes up the girl resting on you. Guess that wasn’t in your head. “Fuck man.”

"I know right. Fuck him!" You're not on speaker but Hyejoo must’ve heard him say that. You massage your ringing ear.

“Ow. But thank you. Seriously, it’s so late. You could’ve called me tomorrow.”

“I’m drunk as shit man. Sounds like you are too.” You don’t even realize how much you’re slurring your words. “Should I pull up, maybe we drink a little more?”

Stare at the woman still holding your cock in place, fluttering her lashes at you. Hyejoo mouths if you’re gonna take much longer. “I. I don’t think I will. We’ll have to meet up some other time, okay?”

Understanding that you’re winding down your call, she gets back upright and starts bouncing again. “You gonna pass out or something?” Joonho says.

“Something like that” Hyejoo teasingly drops her waist into you and waits, then lifts herself. You purse your lips. “Listen, ah.” And again. Purposeful slams into your cock too loud not to be picked up by a phone. “God. I gotta go, I’ll text you again tomorrow aight goodbye,” you rush your words.

She holds her hair up in pleasure and her profane cries let everyone living below know that you’re fucking the most gorgeous girl with more energy than you’ve ever had. For all the pressure on your sensitive nerves, it’s that image of Hyejoo satisfying her need with your cock that brings you closer.

“I’m almost there! Fuck, fuck.” You pull out and despite her drowsiness, Hyejoo diligently takes your dick with both hands, scoots back and bends down, slobbering on it with her mouth while her fingers stroke the skin of your shaft.

Hyejoo’s lips pop when she releases your cock’s tip. “Where do you wanna-”

“Those fucking perfect abs,” you shudder.

She takes advantage of your previous thrusts’ zeal on her thighs and repositions herself in cowgirl one last time to bend back and choke your cock with her toned legs. One single motion is all it takes. A tsunami and a storm clash. Didn’t remind her that you hadn’t cum at all away at sea as you explode. You call out, “Hyejoo, god, yes, fuck, Hyejoo, yes,” at every wave of pleasure. Shove desperately and Hyejoo’s eyes grow big at how much semen streams out of your slit because the volume of cum nearly rivals the fluid she ejected from her wetness. Her inner thighs, her lap and her stomach all soak in stickiness. She holds onto your arms as she finds enjoyment not only from your cock’s throbbing on her clit, but at your biceps and other curves. An inquisitive pinky takes a sample of your cum to lick up then, to your surprise, she collects all the cum she can with both hands and swallows it down.

“Ahh,” she presents her tongue to you.

Finally, you sit up and no amount of exhaustion would stop you from nibbling her neck as thanks.

“Relax, you hungry beast. You just came all over me and now you’re trying to tell the world we just fucked.” She gives you a little suck on your lips instead.

“I don’t mind.” You clash at her mouth and your teeth click. She smiles and gives you a deep but final smooch. Both of you breathe stiltedly and take time to readjust into the world once again.

“Me neither, if I didn’t have a presentation tomorrow.”

You fall back and feel everything aching in a good way. “Ah shit, school.”

“What did I tell you earlier?”

“Hmm?”

Hyejoo falls flat next to you and clasps her hands into yours. “You will be okay. I called them with an excuse. Speaking of which. You’re gonna find out sooner or later that a certain cool as fuck girl blew the whistle on that son of a bitch.”

This whole thing feels like it should be temporary, like a one-time thing. Any more and it’d be weird, yet her confidence makes you reroute all that anxious energy in your heart’s pace into something good. It’s not love but, “Thanks. I just. Thank you.”

“You are always welcome.” Her lips curl up.

“So. You a snitch now, huh?"

"Relax,” she hisses the end of the word. ”Maybe I snooped through the construction company records, maybe I didn’t. You didn’t hear from me, ‘kay?" She nudges your side with her elbow.

“Hey!” You laugh a little, ticklish in that spot. “Okay, okay. How’d you manage that anyway?”

“Joonho didn’t mention it? Well, I have my connections,” Hyejoo says.

You breathe out and you deserve it. “You really are the Captain.”

“Damn right. Guess you’re stuck on this boat a little.” Yawn. “Longer.” Her eyelids slowly descend.

Watch Hyejoo fall asleep and realize she’s nude and still a little sticky. You decide to make a smart decision just once by putting away all the garbage in your apartment. She giggles reflexively when you clean her up and you struggle but manage to put on her previous outfit.

After you get dressed yourself, you lie next to Hyejoo and watch the few lights in the sky all distanced from each other. You feel a little reticent but the old lady shouldn’t fret if the outdoors is a better bedroom for one night. Close your eyes. Drift away into the best sleep you’ve ever had even if it’s only you and a blanket separate the hard concrete rooftop from the atmosphere. Dreams of water are gracious for once. The ocean lacks bounds and you smile for it. Who cares about tomorrow? It’s made of sticks and rope fashioned from whatever bamboo you could find but the raft holds two. That’s all you need.

✦✧✦✧✦✧

"A college roommate scenario where the male reader is living with LOONA's Olivia Hye and she's attracted to him sexually since he moved in due to his physique. Then one day, he got home all stressed and the two hooked up eventually." - @optimisticwritersworld

AFF, AO3

Pretty sure this was supposed to be all casual but then I started adding to explain the co-ed living scenario and the stress, so here we are. Watch out for more LOONA though no promises on timelines

#kpop smut #loona smut #request #male reader #reader insert #title tracks

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mcyt-amber-tftsmp · 3 years

Text

𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐞 {𝐑𝐚𝐧𝐛𝐨𝐛 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫}

Part II of Put Your Head On My Shoulder

Part I: Put Your Head On My Shoulder

Request?: Pancakesunday64 (Pt.1 originally requested by HeartsYeallow)

Character: Ranbob

Side Character(s): None

Story-type: Romantic and Fluff

Story Length: 3050 words

AU or Not: AU of sorts where the four fishermen came but never died

Time Period: Future basically

Plot Summary: I really liked how at the end Ranbob mentions something about keeping his promise to her and that she's his everything. Somehow in my mind I was thinking he meant p̶̡̨̺̳̠͈̮̺̪̽̑́͗͌͗͠r̷̥̠̣̬̥̦̖̗̒̀͑̀̐̆ǫ̵̩̩̱̬̲̹̾͗̓̌͊͐p̶̛̞̟͔̺͆̓̾̀͑͒̕͝ô̴͓̜̺͌̔̀͜s̸̼̹̬̞̯̠͕͊͌͒̊͂͠į̴̞̍̄̐̊̓͑ṉ̶̫͖̩̙̱́̏͗͐͑͘ģ̷͚͙̀̈́̈́͗̂̾̐͠͝͝ to the reader. It just seemed kinda sweet and like a fun pt.2 idea

Small Info: Y/N and Ranbob are already like dating and stuff so yeah also I am thinking of extending this oneshot till pt.3 so yeah

Keywords:

Y/N = Your Name L/N = Last Name F/C = Favorite Color

Trigger Warning: none

Normal Warning: hhhnnnnnnng probs cringe- but cute and heartwarming

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Y/N's Point of View~

We have probably been laying down for a while. I tried to get up but Ranbob still held onto me. I smiled knowing he tends to be really clingy on me.

"Ranbob I need to get up." I said.

"Few more minutes. I don't want you to leave." He said nuzzling my neck a little.

"We can't stay like this forever you know." I said lacing my fingers through his hair as I stroked it a little.

"I know I just don't let go off you just yet." He said still holding onto me.

I decided to give in and stay like this for a few minutes. I continued to stroke his hair more until I heard him purr which made me giggle as I continued to stroke his hair as he continued to purr. I learned this about him like the last time I visited and it was pretty surprising.

"Sweetheart... please stop..." I heard him mumble and I knew he was feeling embarrassed by this considering he finds it embarrassing when he purrs like a cat.

"Come on! It's adorable when you purr like a cat!" I said as moved his head to look at me and I could tell he was slightly blushing in embarrassment.

"Pssh! The only thing adorable here is you." he said and this made me slightly blush.

"Ran no I am not adorable!" I said puffing my cheeks as I hid my face in his chest as I heard him chuckle.

"What? It's true. You are adorable and beautiful in my eyes." he said which made me even redder in the face.

"Fine fine you win." I said and I could imagine him smiling right now.

"How long has it been since you have seen the overworld exactly?" I asked out of random.

"Well... I have gone to the overworld a few times from here but I am not so used to it honestly so I kind of stopped going." He said as I pulled away from his chest.

"Why don't you come with me today?" I said as Ranbob had a slight look of shock as he pondered for a bit.

"I don't know... it's been a while to be honest..." He said as I smiled.

"Not much has really changed. I will be there with you." I said as he looked at me for a bit.

"... Alright. I will go with you for some time." He said as I smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Yay!" I said as Ranbob let me go and slowly got up from bed as I did too.

We both left Ranbob's room as we headed towards the room where I came down from. We eventually reached the place as I went up the ladder first as Ranbob followed behind me. As I got up on the stone floor, I helped Ranbob up.

I saw that my boat was still there so I got in first as I motioned Ranbob to get in. He looked a little nervous but eventually got in slowly. It took a few minutes to reach shore but we eventually arrived safely to the beach.

Ranbob's Point of View~

I wouldn't say I am allergic to water or anything like most endermen but I just preferred to not come in contact with it. I realized that we had reached shore. Y/N got up first as he helped me step out of the safely.

I looked around the place. Nothing much has really changed around here considering I haven't come here for three years straight.

"Nothing really changed much huh?" I said.

"Three years didn't really go through much I guess. But come on! I want to show you around the place." She said grabbing my hand as she dragged me around.

The first thing she showed me was where she lived. She basically lived in a small cottage which actually was pretty homey and welcoming to say the least. I learned that she lives alone here but she doesn't seem to mind but she did have three cats that seemed to warm up to me very quickly.

Right now one of the cats were on my lap as I was stroking it while the other two were sleeping beside me. After a few moments I saw Y/N walk downstairs with something in her hands. She looked like she was going somewhere.

"Are you going somewhere sweetheart?" I asked as she looked at me and nodded.

"Yeah I have something to return to the market. You want to come with?" She asked as I thought for a few second before nodding.

I picked up the cat from my lap as I set it down on the couch as I teleported to Y/N who was waiting outside for me. I basically followed her to the market considering she knows the place better than me but I have a good sense of direction just by looking at my surroundings so I know where is what.

We eventually reached the place. It was an outdoorsy type of market with people selling different things. It looked pretty neat to be honest. It wasn't crowded that's for sure and I was relieved that it wasn't or anything.

"Okay so! We will meet here at the exact same spot. You can look around if you want! I won't take long!" She said as she gave me a small kiss on the cheek as she went off in her direction. I really wanted to follow her but I know that I could trust her so I went the other way to look around.

I didn't really have any sort of interest to look at certain things but I did look around a bit. I saw that a few hybrids seemed to work in these markets like Pigmen, Zombie-Piglins and Humans. There were a few hybrids on that note too that worked here.

I was just passing a jewelry stand until something caught my eye as I walked back to look. Nobody was here but I just decided to look. The thing that caught my eye was a ring that had a F/C stone engraved at the top.

The ring immediately reminded me of Y/N. I got slightly nervous by looking at the ring. The thing is that I really wanted to propose to Y/N but I never really had a ring that's for sure. I don't even know if I should even do it cause I feel like it's too soon. My thoughts were interrupted as I heard someone speak.

"Hello good sir! I see your eye has caught something special." I looked up to come face to face with a man who happened to have brown curly hair and happened to be wearing sun glasses but I caught a glimpse of pure white eyes behind those glasses.

"I um yeah I guess so." I said not knowing what to say.

"I am guessing it's for a certain someone am I right?" He asked as I slowly nodded.

"Um yeah yeah it is honestly." I responded as he nodded.

"Well this type of ring is a good way of showing love and proposing. I am guessing it is for that by the look on your face." He said as he opened the glass from his side as he took the ring out with the box and closed it as he pushed it towards me.

"I-I don't have money so I can't really take this." I said as he shook his head.

"It's no problem. No one really comes here for rings for these types of occasions so take it from me as a gift and luck." He said pushing it slightly further to me as I hesitantly took the box as I looked at him and gave him a small smile.

"I will find a way to pay you back. Thank you sir." I said as he smiled pushing up his glasses.

"Please call me Carlos." He said as waved goodbye.

I walked away as I brought the box up to look at it. I let out a huff of breath as I put it away as I teleported back to where we were supposed to meet up with each other. I reached the place as I looked behind me to see Y/N running here as she stopped and halted to catch her breath.

"Sorry if I kept you waiting!" She apologized as I smiled and shook my head.

"It's alright. I just arrived when you did so it's no problem. Come on lets go back." I said as she nodded and we went towards the direction of her cottage.

We eventually reached the cottage house as we went inside. I saw the cats were still fast asleep on the couch. I smiled going over to them as I stroked them a bit. As I was doing so I saw Y/N come over to me as she sat down beside me.

"So what do you think so far?" She asked.

"Hmm... I would have to say it's nice to say the least. Not much has changed that's for sure and people sure seemed friendly there." I said as I saw her smile.

"I am glad! By the way... um... you don't mind if you stay here with me for a while before you go back to Mizu right?" I heard her say as I looked at her and shrugged.

"I don't mind staying here for a few days as long as I am with you." I said as she smiled even more and hugged me.

It actually gave me enough time to set my plan into action. I did plan on staying here for a week or so. I was planning on proposing to Y/N after a week anyways. I just really loved her and I thought that maybe it was the right time to do so. Now I just needed to get things ready.

Six Days Later~

Today was the day. The day I was proposing to Y/N. I was really nervous to be honest and I had so many possibilities run through my head and most of them were about me getting rejected with a glimpse of her actually accepting it.

I took a deep breath as I told myself things will be okay but of couse I was still nervous. I planned a picnic for both of us at the beach. It was actually a surprise. Y/N was currently outside at the market getting buying somethings which I had the house to myself and had prepared her favorite meal and anything else.

I basically picked up cooking perfectly in the last six days. It's the least I could do to make things go well on my planned picnic. Right now I was just waiting for her to come back as I held a bouquet of F/F. Just as I was thinking, I heard the door open as I went over to see Y/N had come back from outside.

"Hey Ranbob!" She said greeting me with a smile as she noticed I was hiding something behind me.

"What's that you got there?" She asked as I smiled and put the bouquet of F/F in front of her.

"These are for you." I said as she stood there shocked as he slowly took it.

"Thank you! You really didn't have to do this." She said as she hugged me.

"I have something else planned for the both of us. I have to take your outside for it." I said as she looked at me questioningly.

"Really? Okay let me just put these things away." She said running towards the kitchen only to come back a few moments later as we headed out the door. We walked for a few as I came to a certain stop cause of reasons.

Third Person Point of View~

Ranbob eventually came to a stop at a certain point as he looked at you.

"Okay so I want you to keep your eyes closed since it's a surprise and everything. You can open them once I tell you to okay?" he said as you nodded and closed you eyes.

He took your hand as he carefully took you to the place. After a few moments Ranbob again came to a stop as she came in front of you.

"Okay you can open your eyes now sweetheart." You heard him say as you slowly opened your eyes to be greeted with a very pleasant sight which took your breath away.

(Link for the picture)

You were shocked that Ranbob planned a picnic date for the both of you. Honestly you two never went on a date before and it was your first. You didn't really care about not going to dates considering you just loved spending time with him and could care less about those.

But this was something you didn't expect from him. You hugged him as he hugged you back. This was really perfect and well planned.

"Thank you so much Ranbob! I can't believe you did all for this for me. I rally don't deserve this." You said as Ranbob hugged you back shaking his head.

"It's the least I could do to show how much I love you. You deserve every bit of it. Now come on. I know you are pretty hungry." He said as you both sat to eat and enjoy each other's company.

After eating you two decided to talk about random things as you both exchanged laughs and jokes. It was a very beautiful night with the stars shining bright in the night sky. Right now you two were lying on the sandy ground while you were cuddled up on Ranbob's chest as you both looked at the stars in each other's arms.

It was a moment to savor. But of course it wouldn't last long considering it was getting pretty late and you both had to leave before the mobs spawned nearby.

"It's getting late. We should get going." You said as Ranbob looked down at you and nodded as you got up from him so he could sit up.

You both stood up as you both dusted the sand off from you. Ranbob knew that he had to do it other wise he wouldn't be able to do it cause right now was the good time to propose to you. Before you could walk away she grabbed your arm to stop you.

"Y/N wait! I have to tell you something important!" Ranbob said as you stopped to look at him and he looked very nervous.

"Are you alright Ranbob?" You asked looking at the nervous half enderman hybrid as he nodded.

"Yeah it's just that..." Ranbob began as he let out a sigh before continuing.

"Y/N I wanted to tell you that meeting you was one of the things I loved the most. You started out as a good friend of mine by visiting me whenever you got the chance. Then that friendship turned into love. When you returned my feelings I felt very happy knowing I had someone who would love me and I would be able to love the same way. What I am trying to say here is that I love you very much and I want to spend the rest of my life with you so I wanted to ask you..." He began as he took out the small black box from his pocket as you watched him slowly kneel down in front of you as you were shocked.

"Ranbob...?" You whispered as you looked at him.

"Y/N... Would you make me the happiest man alive..." He started as he opened the box to reveal a silver ring with a F/C stone engraved on it. "... And marry me?" He finished as he looked at you.

tears were streaming down your face as your hands were covering your mouth. So many emotions already flooded into you after that heartfelt speech that you didn't know how to accept this but you eventually did.

"Yes! Of course I would marry you!" You happily responded back as Ranbob stood up as he slipped the ring on your finger.

He then smashed his lips onto your as he passionately kissed you as his right hand caressed your cheek while the other hand was intertwined with your other hand and the other wrapped around his neck.

Both of you eventually pulled away as you stayed in each other's loving embrace. He couldn't care about anything else other than the girl he loved so much being in his arms as they were both going to be getting married to each other sooner or later.

You were happy that you were going to his.

Ranbob was happy to finally call you his.

This is what mattered to you both the most.

The love you both had for each other and nothing would be able to change that.

--------------------------------------------------

#ranbob #ranbob x reader #ranbob x you #ranbob x y/n #tales from the smp #lost city of mizu #fluff #oneshots

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