at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

NO PRAISE, NO PROBLEM: DEVELOP YOUR OWN PERFORMANCE STANDARDS

Everyone loves positive feedback. It feels good and often confirms your own assessment of your performance. You think you’ve done good job and now you know. When we were in school, we could use grades or the teachers’ comments as benchmarks for our performance. But there are times, in our work or personal life, where there is no feedback. For example, you may have given a presentation at work and there are no comments from your boss and colleagues either positive or negative. Or, you teach a yoga class, and no students say “Great class” or “Thank you.” SO, the question becomes how do you know how you did?

When we become dependent on external feedback for self-esteem, we can develop what’s known as a contingent self-worth. Contingent self worth is a positive sense of self that exists only with the praise and attention of others. Without that praise and attention, there is low self-esteem.

Because others aren’t always around to share their evaluation of our performance and praise is not always forthcoming, it’s important to develop your own standards for excellence.

View Source: https://drlisanapolitano.com/blog/no-feedback-no-problem/

imagine, say, Bunnyx went back to Origins Season 1 and pulled Gabriel aside as he was considering picking up the Hawkmoth mantle and showed him, "Look, Gabriel. If you continue on this path, you WILL succeed in getting the Ladybug and Black Cat miraculous. You WILL make a wish. But getting there will tear you apart. You will lose what humanity you have, you will literally rot away from the inside, spend the last months of your life in agonizing pain, Nathalie and Adrien (the only two people in your life you can even pretend to care about) will spit on your name and Nathalie will grow to despise you so much she will attempt to kill you. And your wish? It will NEVER bring Emilie back. You won't even be able to bring yourself to do it, because you'll realize that you've become everything that she hated and never wanted you to be. Emilie WILL STAY DEAD, and in the end, all you will be able to wish for is an end to your now-miserable life. All this gamble will win you is your grave."

idk I just don't think Gabriel's response to that would be "oh yay! I win!"

Thinking about how Diavolo’s feelings transcend time and how in the Nightbringer UR+ card Demon Lord’s Castle Tour this conversation happens.

When asked, “Do you wish to see your father?”

Diavolo responds:

“I suppose I do . . .” isn’t the typical reaction to how a child would feel about wanting to see their parent. Especially when said parent has essentially been in a coma for a year.

Along with how Diavolo describe his father.

It makes more sense why when you learn in Lesson 56 how Diavolo was treated by him growing up.

Diavolo can tell when others are lying but is unable to understand his father’s intentions.

Diavolo mentions that he lived a very sheltered life growing up. That from a young age his father never allowed him a chance to talk to anyone outside the castle.

His childhood friend was Mephistopheles. A demon literally RAISED to be his friend. Putting a barrier between the two because Mephistopheles would put Diavolo on a pedestal.

The isolating childhood he experienced riddled with his strict father constantly scolding him.

Despite everything MC is so important to him he wants to see his father again so we can meet.

au where alhaitham is the only one in sumeru who can speak ancient merfolk language so he has to take in kaveh, the last merman whom the akademiya just rescued 🥹

you can read my tiny short fanfic here! (wow it’s been ages since i had the urge to write something!)

November 11, 2023—Hospitals in Gaza have been under relentless bombardment over the past 24 hours. Al-Shifa Hospital complex, the biggest health facility where staff for Doctors Without Borders/Médecins Sans Frontiéres (MSF) are still working, has been hit several times, including the maternity and outpatient departments, resulting in multiple deaths and injuries.

The hostilities around the hospital have not stopped. MSF teams and hundreds of patients are still inside Al-Shifa Hospital. MSF urgently reiterates its calls to stop the attacks against hospitals, for an immediate ceasefire, and for the protection of medical facilities, medical staff, and patients.

“We are being killed here, please do something," texted one of MSF's nurses from the basement of Al-Shifa Hospital this morning, where he and his family were sheltering from the incessant bombing. “Four or five families are sheltering now in the basement, the shelling is so close, my kids are crying and screaming in fear.”

"The situation in Al-Shifa is truly catastrophic," said Ann Taylor, MSF's Head of Mission in Palestine. "We call on the Israeli government to cease this unrelenting assault on Gaza’s health system. Our staff and patients are inside Al-Shifa Hospital, where the heavy bombing has not stopped since yesterday.” [...]

MSF denounces this death warrant on civilians currently trapped in Al-Shifa Hospital signed by the Israeli military. There needs to be an urgent and unconditional ceasefire between all warring parties; humanitarian aid must be supplied to the entirety of Gaza now.

At Al-Quds Hospital, MSF has lost contact with a surgeon who is working and sheltering there with his family. Other health facilities, including Al Rantisi Hospital, which MSF has also supported in the past, were reportedly surrounded by Israeli tanks.

(emphasis mine)

i want to meet myself from someone else's point of view

Intrusive thoughts

the way lando’s demeanor changed as soon as oscar came into the interview is just stunning

like he went from lando “media-trained answers” norris to lando “soft, inner-personality” norris

Sorry but if you say you're "being realistic" or "seeing the world as it is" and then only spout of the negatives then you're not being realistic and your worldview will devour you whole. Pessimism is not realistic. There is no world void of joy and to believe that is to ignore the goodness in the world and only see things in an unrealistic, cynical perspective that is not and never will be how things are. Find some joy in the smallest of things or perish.

WHAT!!!!! (lovingly)

wayne brady is pansexual!!! 💗💛💙🥳

i’m pansexual. in doing my research, both with myself and just with the world, i couldn’t say if i was bisexual, because i had to really see what that was, especially because i really have not gotten a chance to act on anything. so, i came to pansexual because — and i know that i’m completely messing up the dictionary meaning — but to me, pan means being able to be attracted to anyone who identifies as gay, straight, bi, transsexual or non-binary. being able to be attracted across the board. and, i think, at least for me for right now, that is the proper place. i took pan to mean that not only can i be attracted to any of these people or types physically, but i could be attracted to the person that is there. i’ve dealt with the shame. a shame cake, just eating it every single day — and then worried about… people finding out. i’ve always had a wonderful community of friends who are in the lgbtq+ community, people that i’ve grown up with in shows, gays and lesbians, and, later in life, my trans relatives and my niece. i’ve always had that community, but i've always felt like a sham because i wasn’t being forthcoming with myself. i could speak out about black issues because i can’t hide that. and you can play at being an ally, but until the day that you can truly say, “this is who i am, and i wanna stand next to you,” that's not… i always wanted that day to come. i’ve told myself in the past, also, nobody needs to know my personal business. the world can absolutely go without knowing that wayne identifies as pan. but that gave me license to still live in the shadows and to be secretive. what does that feel like to actually not be shameful, to not feel like, “oh, i can’t be part of this conversation because i’m lying?” i had to break that behavior. i’m now trying to be the most wayne brady i can be. i don’t know about most, actually. i’m still coming together. but if i’m healthy, then i can go onstage at let’s make a deal and be the best wayne brady that everybody wants and expects. i can be the best dad that maile needs. i can be the best friend to mandie, the best son to my mother, and one day, the best partner to someone, because i’m doing this for me. not dating yet though! [laughs] i am single, but it’s not about being with someone right now. i’ve got some work to do still. then, wayne as a single, open-minded pansexual can make a decision and be free and open to other people.

i included more quotes from the article than just strictly pan related because it’s quite touching. good for him!!!! 🌈👏🥰

my secret confession is i think a lot of current art in comics is pretty but sometimes way too glossy and lifeless... it kinda feels like a sticker sheet where they just swap out generic stock poses that they have on hand for that character rather than the art being reflective of the actual story and moment the character is currently in

[ cw: nightmares / trauma / ]

Post-invasion, Mikey sneaks into Leo’s room and when asked by Leo what the problem was, Mikey just smiles and says since he’s awake and knew Leo would be too, he didn’t want either of them alone. Leo laughs and lets Mikey stick around, both of them clumped together on Leo’s bed, watching grainy compilations of old Lou Jitsu commercials on Leo’s phone.

Technically, Mikey didn’t lie. He just didn’t explain everything that led him to Leo’s room. He didn’t explain the nightmare of his arms burning up too bright, too fast, destroyed before Raph and Donnie have a chance to help. He didn’t explain how he woke up with a wail caught in his throat, phantom pain in his arms and chest alike chasing away any semblance of exhaustion. He didn’t explain how his mind made sure he knew, vividly, that if one thing went wrong with his portal, then he would have never seen Leo again.

He didn’t explain, and he didn’t have to. Leo knows his brothers better than he knows himself, and Mikey has always been easy to read. So it’s no trouble to let Mikey know that he’s still with them, that Leo is here and alive with everyone else. And when Mikey finally regains his exhaustion and falls asleep leaning against Leo, Leo simply maneuvers him into a more comfortable position and stays by his side.

He doesn’t move, doesn’t go to sleep - not that he could, anyway. He just mindlessly scrolls on his phone, the soft snores of his little brother filling the room. He stays in place, awake, because he wants to be sure that when Mikey wakes up again it’s to the immediate sight that Leo is alive and well and home.

And, if Leo’s bring honest, that’s a reminder not just for Mikey’s sake.

ok jokes aside… I’ve said this before but like the whole design of Volcano Manor is soooo symbolic of who Rykard is as a character… when you enter the manor through the front door, it’s grand and lavishly decorated and well maintained:

but behind curtain it’s an absolute horror — sinister serpent-creatures, gruesome torture devices and cages, half-dead victims, piles of corpses.

During the Shattering Rykard built up this persona as a “worthy sovereign,” someone who dared to stand up to an unjust order and to do the unthinkable in order to fight for a new world, someone whose ideals inspired his followers to fight for him. Then, he seemingly threw all these ideals away when he fed himself to the serpent god, descending into “mere greed” for power… but I don’t think Rykard ever really changed, I think his true motivations were always for the sake of power. It’s why he enforced the law of the Erdtree so brutally and turned his cloak so readily; I think he enjoys the feeling of exercising his power over others and despises being treated like a servant. His transformation into a grotesque monstrosity that is greed personified is just the natural conclusion of his greatest flaws.

Though Rykard during the Shattering and Tanith during the present day present their goals as noble despite their blasphemous nature, in reality, they are violent and grotesque… it matches our view of Volcano Manor as an initially noble and impressive estate that grows more and more sinister as we explore beyond the walls of the main hall. The way the setting is designed perfectly matches the character that looms at the heart of it... and that’s why I think it makes perfect sense for Rykard to have himself crafted both the manor’s noble facade and the horrors “behind the curtain.”