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mihrsuri · 1 year

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The Lioness and The Bear’s Cubs: The children of Elizabeth Tudor & Robert Dudley in my Tudors OT3 Universe.*

*(An alternate history in which Anne Boleyn, Henry VIII and Thomas (Frain) Cromwell are in a secret triad marriage from 1536, have eight children, Anne is always a beloved Queen and their oldest son marries Mihrimah Sultan and they bring in a truly progressive by modern standards golden world, minus colonialism and empire because it’s my wish fulfilment au)

Anne (b. 1552): As Elizabeth inherited her mothers title before her marriage of Duchess of Pembroke, so Anne, as the oldest daughter, inherited it in turn (to this day, the Duchy is passed to the oldest daughter). She married Matthew Cecil, son of William Cecil (I think this is hilarious due to the fact that okay, Robert and William Cecil aren’t as ‘…FUCK IT’S HIM’ at each other in this AU but they still kind of are, so the fact that their children marry each other is like, Cecil is delighted but also he really has to deal with ROBERT DUDLEY and vice versa). They have eight children - William, Robert, Elizabeth, George, Anne, Turhan, Henry and Mihrimah.

Anne is her fathers favourite child, without a doubt. She is also extremely like to her maternal grandmother Queen Anne in looks. Incredibly intelligent she becomes a renowned poet in her adulthood - corresponding with other learned women from across the European and Islamic worlds, she loved to experiment with form and style - particularly admired for her series of sonnets. Known to love wearing green, can ride better than both her parents, charms everyone.

Also she’s her cousin the King’s secret spymaster but that’s an entire other story I might even write one day.

Henry (b. 1557): Duke of Leicester after his father. Married to Cecily, daughter of John de Vere, Earl of Oxford. He is the father of three children - Robert, Mihrimah & Thomas. Harry is tbh, a giant womaniser - he and his wife are friends but they married for reasons of companionship and children, not love, though they are fond of each other. He is the courtier, the one who absolutely inherited all his fathers Dramatic - often joked that he should have been an actor upon the stage. Not so much a scholar, though he’s definitely smart, he is a brilliant musician and dancer though. Also known for his fashion sense - he wore ‘brilliant robes of deep black with golden trim’ and an expert jouster which gives his parents approximately fifteen heart attacks.

Thomas (b. 1557): Henry’s twin. He married Halime, Lady Stanley and they are the parents of four daughters - Elizabeth, Maryam, Soraya & Philippa. Thom is the one who manages the Leicester Estates and he’s happy doing that - his hobby is gardening/garden design and the gardens of the family seat are still famous to this day - he wrote a whole number of works on gardening and gardens and corresponded with gardeners from all across the world. Almost certainly has a plant named after him. Ambitious but his ambitions go into gardening.

Robert (b. 1559): Sailor, traveller and early travel writer (in that he wrote a chronicle of his travels). Lord High Admiral for his cousin King Thomas II, he travelled as far as Indonesia and lived for a long time in his cousin Maryam’s court in Persia, where he fathered a daughter Parisa with a woman named Tahmina. So so much wandering feet - language nerd in the extreme, Robbie definitely wanted to learn all he could about the world and was a superb commander and leader. Credited with building the modern navy.

Marian (b. 1580). Marian died in 1680 and was her parents Extremely Surprise Late In Life Child. She was christened Mary but everyone called her Marian. She first married Alfonso, Duke of Ferrera (who I think might be a descendent of Lucrezia Borgia) with whom she had four children - Francesco, Giovanni, Contessina and Lorenzo and secondly Turhan, Earl of Surrey with whom she had twins Turhan & Mihrimah. Marian is amazing - she lived through the English Civil War and the Restoration Period and then the return of the monarchy under her relative Queen Charlotte Askala - during the period of the Restoration King she helped to smuggle out refugees from the Restoration Regime - particularly Jewish, Muslim and other non white families using her contacts in Italy as well as her noble blood to get away with it well into her old age.

She’s the painter of the family - particularly learning from female artists in Italy - her surviving landscape works hang in the Albion National Gallery today and her informal sketches during the Restoration Regime remain a valuable insight into this period of history.

#tudorsedit #lils edits #ot3: political power trio #tudors ot3 verse reference #otp: my robin #pending graphic tag #alternate history

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desertfangs · 11 months

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Had some thoughts after reading your recent fic

Do you think Armand and Daniel might have had a slight role reversal in terms of energy levels after Daniel was turned? When Daniel was mortal he was always getting older and more tired and finding it harder to keep up with the forever 17 year old with an immortal's boundless energy.

But when he's finally in the blood, maybe it was Armand's turn to feel like the slightly grumpy and tired 500 year old man with his hyperactive puppy of a fledgling.

I'm just picture newly turned Daniel throwing a coat around Armand's shoulders and dragging him out the door while Armand tries to suggest they have a night in, wondering if this is how Daniel felt all those years

Oh my gosh, this is a great question! (Also thank you for reading my fic!!)

I do think maybe they have a slight role reversal. Or, at the very least, their dynamic changes a little. Daniel is very high on being a vampire at first. Armand tells him, "You take a lot of teaching." He's a little overwhelmed by Daniel as a vampire, and Daniel is a little overwhelmed by heightened vampire senses, and while they are in the midst of a crisis, I do think Daniel takes some time to adapt to his vampire senses and abilities. I think Armand is fantastic maker and teacher, and Daniel is lucky to have not only him there but also so many others who can give him tips and tricks and also tell him stories about when they first turned.

(I will say I don't think Daniel is particularly an outlier. It might be an unpopular opinion, but I think his reaction to vampirism is pretty standard, especially given how potent Armand's blood is. We don't get a lot of him as a vampire until we see him again mad in Marius' house, but I've mentioned before I don't think it was being overwhelmed by vampirism that did him in, but rather Armand's apparent death drove him mad.)

But yes, once Daniel has the blood and is a vampire, he's no longer being run ragged by trying to keep up with Armand. And he's also no longer burdened with the knowledge of his own aging and death. I am older than Daniel was when he was turned, and I can tell you as you get older, your body DOES WEIRD SHIT. Stuff stops working as well. And I'm not even THAT OLD. But like... imagine living with Armand, ageless and turned at 17, while Daniel keeps finding more gray hairs or new lines on his face or he can't move his left arm one night because he slept on it funny - that had to have to weighed heavily on him. So I think it was just the sword of Damocles, over him all the time in those last couple of years, and no matter how hard he tried to ignore it and push it back, it was hanging above him ready to fall.

So Daniel is lighter and unburdened as a vampire. He's ready to live forever with Armand. And Armand is absolutely proud of him and still loves him, of course, but Armand is a fatalist who starts to worry about when things will fall apart. I don't think that fear becomes too pronounced until later and I don't think he starts subconsciously pushing Daniel away for years yet, but it's in the back of his mind that Daniel may not need or want him anymore one day.

So in that respect their roles have changed. Daniel probably is excited to go travel or see some show or just go to Miami and walk around and shoot the shit and talk about the drunks stumbling past and all the tourists running around. He wants to go see and do everything now that he can do it without stressing about the lines on his face when he catches his reelection. He's excitable and hyper and like... I don't know how long dude is high on being a vampire, but I kind of think that initial burst probably lasts a while. And Daniel is talkative and affable and no doubt getting along with everyone.

Armand, meanwhile, is also dealing with all of his ex's in his house. So there's that to consider, too. And playing host. And running whatever business he's running on Night Island and elsewhere. (He has people! But he still needs to sign checks and papers and check in.)

So yeah, I do think a lot of '86 and '87 and maybe even '88 are more of Daniel going "Hey, boss, let's go see this thing or do this thing" and Armand being a little more... maybe not reluctant but less quick to jump on board with the idea. Not all the time. He's still Armand, he still likes to go see things and learn things! But sometimes!

I'll tell you, I think the real karma is Benji and Sybelle, wherein he has to indulge their interests and needs and suddenly Armand is there at TG remembering when he used to be the one dragging Daniel out the door as Sybelle grabs his hand and drags him to the music store or to see some concert and he's like "Ah, this must be how Daniel felt."

Thank you so much for the ask! Sorry for the long essay. TL;DR: Absolutely! LOL! I love the idea of Armand grumpily sitting in his office wondering if he can hide out and avoid being dragged to yet another rock concert with Daniel and Lestat over on the mainland for the 3rd time in a week.

#sorry i cannot give short answers apparently #i think about this a lot clearly #my brain is just this and maybe a grocery list #thank you so much for the ask!!!#i hope i'm actually answering your question #answers in the desert #anonymous #daniel molloy #armand #armand/daniel #queen of the damned #vampire daniel

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gerogerigaogaigar · 11 months

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Dolly Parton - Coat Of Many Colors

The 70s weren't particularly kind to country music, but Dolly Parton stands out as a shining beacon amidst a fog of mediocrity. The title track is a beautiful story about a mother's love that is apparently a true story from Parton's childhood. From there we immediately get a song where the singer's mother steals her boyfriend. It kinda goes like that, either beautiful sincere tracks like Coat Of Many Colors and Here I Am, or unrelenting savagery like in Traveling Man and If I Lose My Mind. I would never have it any other way. Go off queen.

Tracy Chapman - s/t

Ready for some emotional devastation? This album comes out the gate swinging and doesn't let up. This album's theme is feeling helpless to change your circumstances. Fast Cars is about trying to run away from a toxic environment only to recreate it. Behind The Walls is about being unable to stop domestic abuse even when you know it's happening. Mountains Of Things is about being trapped by commodity fetishism despite knowing it won't help you. In all these songs systems prevent individuals from improving their lives. The message is nothing without the actual substance of the music though, so it's fortunate that Chapman has one of the best and richest voices I've ever heard. And her brand of folk rock is beautifully complimentary. Lefty music doesn't get much better than this.

Bob Dylan - Freewheelin' Bob Dylan

It may be his second album, but this is his real debut. Bob Dylan proved that you could be a shitty singer, mediocre guitarist, and atrocious harmonica player, but if put together the right way then the sum of the parts is worth so much more. Dylan's combination of traditional folksy numbers like Girl From North Country and Don't Think Twice It's All Right are matched with the political statements that made him a counterculture icon. Masters Of War may seem blunt and obvious by today's standards, but it's stark condemnation of war mongering politicians is still pretty brutal. And A Hard Rains A-Gonna Fall is proof of his ability to write lyrics that express abstract feelings rather than direct thoughts.

Herbie Hancock - Head Hunters

I feel like when people think of jazz they don't tend to think of catchy toe tappers. There's an expectation for it to be a fairly serious genre that is hard to "get". Herbie Hancock threw that idea right out the window when he made Head Hunters the most fun jazz album of all time. The funk influences are extremely apparent with each track featuring an extremely punchy drum beat and juicy fucking bass lines that will get permanently stuck in your head. Everyone is nailing it here but obviously Hancock himself is the star player with his electric piano and clavinet solos having the brightest and bubbliest tone I've ever heard and it just cuts through the mix and delivers pure joy to your ears. Without a doubt one of my favorite albums of all time.

Pink Floyd - Piper At The Gates Of Dawn

When I was in high school one of my friends just fucking loved the song Bike and sometimes we would just burst into it whenever or wherever. Like all of walking somewhere and we'd just start up like "IVE GOT A BIKE YOU CAN RIDE IT IF YOU LIKE!" full fucking volume like a bunch of animals. Anyway this album is fanciful as all hell. Gnomes, scarecrows, bikes, kitty cats named Lucifer Sam, and bedtime stories. This album is delightful. It exudes innocent joy like no other album. Songs like Astronomy Domine and Interstellar Overdrive sound spacey not because they sound peaceful like floating in space but explosive like a rocket taking off. Other tracks will sound like campfire songs. It's beautiful. The end of Bike where the album closes out on a disjointed series of cacophonous clanking was my first introduction to noise as music so that song probably ruined me permanently.

Devo - Q: Are We Not Men? A: We Are Devo!

One of the original punk bands even if you wouldn't normally think of them as such. Devo did everything in their power to be weird little freaks. Jerky, stuttery guitars and rigid drum beats all designed to sound as mechanical as possible. It an amazing achievement that is perfectly exemplified by their awkward but brilliant cover of the Rolling Stones' Satisfaction. There's a general sense of 50s rock and roll filtered through the 'came back wrong' trope. The album lumbers along like it's made of de evolved rock music.

Elton John - Honky Château

This is probably Elton John's most cohesive album. The country rock of Tumbleweed Connection meets the dramatic arrangements of Madman Across The Water. John's songwriting partner Bernie Taupin is also at the top of his game on this one. Obviously everyone loves Rocket Man, it's iconic for a reason, by good god is the song I Think I'm Going To Kill Myself funny. I'm serious, this tongue and cheek song about teenage angst is one of the funniest things I've ever heard. I'm kinda blown away at how good Elton John, a British man, is at doing honky tonk and country music too. Too talented of a guy really. Love this album.

#500 album gauntlet #dolly parton #tracy chapman #bob dylan #herbie hancock #pink floyd #devo #elton john #halfway done only 250 more to go

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jyaskier · 11 months

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I’m actually writing my first short story..

Whenever I look back, she’s smiling straight at me with this plastered on perfect white smile. As if we’re still eighteen and there was nothing standing in the way between dreams and stars, only the two of us in the magical bubble - comfortable and trapped.

 The lights with buckled seats are still on but I already hear some impatient individuals wrestling with their coats. I manage to get a quick look of the stewardess rolling her perfectly lined eyes, before the plane officially stops and jungle begins. During every travel, the ‘leaving plane’ part is probably my least favourite - doesn’t matter where or when I’m flying, it’s always the same - everybody needs to get out first. I liked to enjoy the thought I’m different, but at my age it’s a shame to lie to oneself; at the end of the day I am just another sheep in the herd, following mindlessly imprinted need.  It’s okey, I think. As long as I acknowledge it, it’s not really a problem.  I’m on the airport’s corridor before I know it, I’ve walk this way countless amount of times, with so many different things happening around me in that moments - a place that watched me through years.  I hear my shoes clipping on the stone floor. I come from around the corner and something sad and adult clasps it’s hands with joy at the short queue waiting at the passport check.  The last steps are light, it’s almost like flying, till I station myself at the end of the line, right behind a grumpy man in a neon tracksuit. That’s when second wave of memories lands.

 It was the day before she left, that I realised that I love her. Tangled under her duvet, my nose buried in her neck and the screeching blasts of cold and hot hitting my lungs, my heart and my head.  ‘I can’t fall asleep,’ she mumbled, her fingers pulling material of my T-shirt. I knew she was checking if I was still up as well.  ‘Me too,’ I whispered back after few seconds. It was exciting, how my body and soul could be woken up by just few words.  She wiggled out of my arms, prompted herself on one elbow and looked down on me. I’ve never felt particularly beautiful, definitely not in high school with the toxic beauty standards that all tried to achieve and failed miserably with puberty raging around like a hungry animal; waiting to send out greasy hair, pimples, blemishes and all kind of disgusting shit that toppled the vote of popularity on the corridors. Yet with her looking at me, really seeing me, I’ve never felt more special.  Nothing mattered when I felt her approval, wrapping me tightly like a soft cover. If I only knew back then, that smell of roses that filled our bubble was the poison that slowly killed me.

‘Next!’ And I’m back on the airport. It’s my turn, so I pass my demolished passport to the man behind the counter and wait. He looks me up and down, clicks something on a computer - his face’s an open book with brows frowned in deeply set unhappiness. For few seconds, I study him trying to understand whether it’s his natural face expression. Before I come to any conclusion though, he returns my documents and wave of co-passengers pushes me forward.  This visit is special. Usually, my parents are waiting for me in the arrivals, but this time it’s just me and my bag and no one to greet me in the motherland.  I’m not bothered by loneliness, not anymore. It’s just how things are, how I chosen them to be. In the last decade of my dating adventure, I was never swept off my feet and even if I managed to push myself to see someone for the second time, it never felt right. And I like to rationalise it - maybe I’m just not a relationship material, maybe I’m just not capable of loving another person, at the same time knowing perfectly why I’m like that. Buried deep within my core is a dark place, a secret so dear I do no dare to even think of it. I love and hate that part. Or maybe all of them actually?  Arrival hall is crowded, but empty. I make my way to the exit without a glance sideway and am greeted by early winter crisp outside. The shower coat I got on me is nothing more then a leaf against my hometown harsh wind. If I could, I would embrace the familiar shivers that run down my back. In the general fashion of midday traveller, I position myself by the entrance and think – what’s next? I could order an Uber or follow my periodical ambition to save some money and just use the train. With heavy sigh I unblock my phone; again, I don’t like to lie to myself anymore.

I will start saving tomorrow.  Before Dimi in black Toyota picks me up and with great struggle packs up my suitcase, I manage to have a stressed cigarette, which only fuels my anxiety. At least this feeling is familiar. ‘Holiday?’ Dimi smiles at me in the front mirror. I want to remind him to watch the road, but it’s too troublesome to argue with him, so instead I muster my best ‘life-is-a-paradise’ expression. ‘Sort of?’ I sound too loud with only gentle swooshes of electric car to accompany it.  And too eager apparently, because Dimi continues: ‘It’s the best time to visit, you can go to the sea, there are parties as well if you fancy.’ And then he goes on about different locations across town where you can get the best drinks with accurate alcohol percentage, best spots to equip oneself with other substances and eventually where to go if you’re looking for some casual fun. Honestly speaking, that bit hooks me up for a short second, right before he turns directly to me and asks: ‘Unless you have a boyfriend?’ I’m not sure whether it’s my face expression or the lack of answer that follows, but we travel in blissful silence from that moment onward.   ‘So what? You have a boyfriend now?’ Is what she asked me right before we entered our last year at school. We sat in my room, some boy band dancing and sweating on the screen of a laptop and tired summer sun creeping through IKEA’s cheapest curtains was nimbly warm.  ‘I guess? I’m not sure, we never, like, addressed that,’ I mumble, eyes pinned to the dolphin boys jumping on the stage, my mouth packed with sweet and sour noodles we got from a small Chinese place downstairs.  ‘How can you not know something like that? He’s weird,’ she smacks her lips, prompting her chin on my shoulder. It always felt natural, the touch of her on me. ‘You don’t even know him.’ I roll my eyes right before my phone buzzes with a notification. I glanced at it quickly, acknowledging the fact that I’m now someone to receive primary attention from another human being, then proceed to stuff myself with more dinner.  ‘Is it him?’ She sounded annoyed, I’ve heard that high pitched voice more then once; mostly when something has been greatly bothering her. My brown frowns. ‘Yes, but it can wait. I’m spending time with you now.’ Her shoulders slumped a bit to my words and I glanced at the elegant lines of her neck relaxing.  I was and I am a proud bisexual woman - thanks to Pirates of the Caribbean of course - but there is something enigmatic in my sex, a feeling I cannot place my finger on. It’s a different kind of attraction then that towards men. Liking a woman is like having a very fancy drink; you enjoy it way too much and don’t feel it’s effect until you’re too drunk to remember your own name. Yet, you keep on drinking until world is blurry and shapeless and completely out of control. That’s how I fell for her as well - I didn’t know I was in her trap until it was too late and she was oxygen and water and everything I needed to survive.  Looking back, I pity and envy myself for being able to be so consumed by feelings.

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tablestakesyogi · 3 months

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Jek's Miracle

Martina, Jek, Elo and Ike Martina and Jek are people you can count on. They are poor by western standards, but they have big hearts. They are raising four kids of their own, but also have taken care of dozens of their nieces, nephews and aunties who come from even leaner circumstances. It’s who they are, and it’s what is expected in their community. Martina is originally from the island of Sumba. Thanks to our friend Ibu Gedong, she lived with us in Berkeley for three years, and helped raise Max when he was a baby. She had met Jek before coming to America and planned to marry him. However, Martina was a careful young woman, and vowed to make sure that Jek didn’t play around too much while she was away. Fortunately, he lived up to her high expectations, and she married him and moved to his home island of Flores. We have visited them several times over the past several years at their simple home in Maumere and have admired their generosity and the love and service they give to their family and community.

Jek and his daughter Ike talking to a fisherman I’ve traveled to many places in the world that are destitute, so I wasn’t particularly shocked that Maumere was poor but it was also very dry. Probably poor because it’s dry since there’s very little rainfall on the coastal plain where it sits and only a few puny streams flow down from the mountains. That means meager water resources to grow food or support industry. Martina and Jek rank among the middle class in Maumere mainly because Jek earned a college degree and worked for many years for development organizations building schools and hospitals throughout eastern Indonesia. Martina is an enterprising woman who has raised pigs and chickens and ran a small snack shop outside their front door. Jek had also bought a two-hectare piece of land he hoped to farm which is located a mile from their house. Middle class in Maumere means they live in a simple tin house with an outdoor kitchen where they cook over a wood fire. Importantly, however, they can afford to take care of their family members from both Flores and Sumba who need a home and a meal.

Martina, Jek with their family + Ibu and Pak When I visited them in 2019, they were having a hard time. A few months before Jek had refused to allow a corrupt government official to skim money off a hospital project he was directing. The price he paid for this honesty was his job. He decided to focus on turning his property into a farm and he was raising goats and trying to grow corn. But there wasn’t enough water and the crops died, and soon after so did the goats. Martina’s pig business also hit hard times after a wave of Asian swine flu killed all her animals. In April 2023, I visited them again with my Balinese friends Puji and Putu joining me. I warned them that they would see a generous but very poor family. However, when we arrived, I noticed a new brick house under construction next door. I inquired if they had new neighbors, but Martina said it was their new house. In the backyard, the pig stalls were once again full of grunting, hungry and growing animals. After a sumptuous meal, we all decided to take a walk up to the farm. Again, I warned Puji and Putu that we were likely to see a tangle of dry and dying crops and some skinny goats. It was getting dark when we arrived, but as we rounded the last hill, the landscape was bathed in bright lights from a structure above the farm. And instead of the scrubby goat pasture I’d seen before there was row after row of healthy corn stalks with pipes and irrigation ditches bringing the plants a bountiful supply of water.

I was flummoxed by the transformation of the farm, not to mention the new house and thriving pig farm. It took a while for Jek to tell me the story because my Indonesian language skills are weak. But here’s what he told me: About a year before he was stressed because after losing his job and the pig farm, there just wasn’t enough money to provide for his family. He had hoped to make a go of farming, but there was no chance due to the lack of water. So, he had gone up to the top of the farm and sat on a rock where he often meditated. This time he asked God for a miracle. He specifically asked for water to help grow his crops and feed his family. Jek and Martina have close relationship with God and Jesus. Like most of the other people on Flores they are Catholic, a religion which arrived with the Portuguese colonists. It’s a different kind of Catholicism though because it overlays the original animist religion that was here before. It’s a religion alive with ancestors and spirits which are everyday parts of Martina and Jek’s life.

Yes, that's Mother Mary looking over Martina and I About two weeks after his prayer, Jek met a man walking around his property. The man said he was a water surveyor and wanted to do a test well. Jek agreed. A few weeks after that he found out that there is a vast aquifer under his farm which would supply enough water for the entire town of Maumere. The municipal water authority said they would like to lease the rights to the water. While Jek considered this, the water agency also found an aquifer on another property. That owner wanted a substantial sum of money for the water rights. Jek didn’t think this discovery was about money. “This was a gift from God and an answer to my prayer,” he told me. “I didn’t think it would be right to take money for what God had given.” The water agency and Jek worked out an agreement in which he would lease them the rights to the water in exchange for water for his farm, and his house. The rest would be sent by pipeline down to the thirsty town of Maumere. Jek was already well respected in Flores. But his gift of water to the people of Maumere was a very big deal on the island. He was at his house one day when a delegation of local leaders arrived. He served them tea while they asked him to be a candidate to the provincial parliament. He subsequently agreed and will be on the ballot this February when elections are held in Indonesia.

As a retired political consultant, I quizzed Jek how he planned to remind the voters of the bounty he had given to his community. He failed to take my very valuable advice and reminded me: “Pak Dave this water was a miracle from God. It’s not for me to brag about.” Read the full article

#FloresIndonesia #Indonesia #miracle #poverty #watermiracle

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mbbsblogsblog · 7 months

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My MBBS Dreams -A Journey to Ukraine

Completing high school is a major milestone in any student's life, marked by excitement and uncertainty about the future. It's a time when many doors open, and the choices made during this pivotal moment can significantly shape one's destiny. For me, after finishing my 12th academic year, an unexpected opportunity to travel to Ukraine changed the course of my life, leading me to embark on a journey to pursue my dream of becoming a medical professional.

The trip to Ukraine was nothing short of remarkable. It was not something I had planned for; in fact, it was a serendipitous occurrence that would set the stage for my future endeavors. My visit to Ukraine was an eye-opening experience, one that exposed me to a completely different world and opened my eyes to new possibilities.

Upon arrival in Ukraine, I was immediately struck by the country's rich history and vibrant culture. The architecture, the people, and the landscapes were all enchanting. I explored the beautiful cities of Kyiv, Lviv, and Odessa, each with its unique charm. As I delved deeper into the Ukrainian culture, I also discovered the country's rich tradition of medical education and healthcare.

During my visit, I had the privilege of visiting some of Ukraine's renowned medical universities. The impressive infrastructure, well-equipped laboratories, and highly qualified faculty were hard to ignore. I was particularly captivated by the emphasis on practical training and research opportunities provided to students. It was evident that Ukraine had a thriving medical education system that was producing skilled healthcare professionals.

My interaction with international students studying in Ukraine further piqued my interest. The diverse student body, coming from various corners of the globe, shared their positive experiences of studying medicine in Ukraine. Their stories were inspiring, and it became clear that pursuing an MBBS in Ukraine could offer an incredible international exposure and a promising future in the field of medicine.

Upon returning to my home country, I was filled with a newfound sense of purpose and a desire to pursue my dream of becoming a doctor. The idea of studying medicine in Ukraine had firmly rooted itself in my mind. However, such a decision required thorough research, careful planning, and a significant commitment, both academically and financially.

One of the key reasons that led me to choose MBBS in Ukraine was the affordability. The tuition fees and cost of living in Ukraine were comparatively lower than in many other countries. This made pursuing my dream of becoming a doctor much more attainable.

Furthermore, the quality of education in Ukraine was a major selling point. The medical curriculum was on par with international standards, and the universities were recognized by organizations like the World Health Organization (WHO) and the Medical Council of India (MCI), ensuring that I would receive a globally recognized medical degree.

Another significant factor that solidified my decision was the opportunity for international exposure. Studying in a foreign country and interacting with students from diverse backgrounds not only enriches one's personal experiences but also prepares future doctors to understand and cater to the healthcare needs of a global community.

Choosing to study MBBS in Ukraine was not a decision taken lightly. It required meticulous planning and the support of my family, who stood by me through every step of the process. I spent months preparing for the entrance exams, securing necessary documents, and completing the admission procedures. The road to Ukraine was long and filled with challenges, but my determination and support from my loved ones helped me overcome every obstacle.

Now, as I stand on the threshold of my medical education journey in Ukraine, I reflect on the incredible twist of fate that brought me to this point. The decision to study medicine in Ukraine has not only granted me a chance to fulfill my dreams but also the opportunity to explore a new culture, make lifelong friendships, and develop into a well-rounded individual.

My journey to Ukraine after completing my 12th academic year has been transformative, and I am excited to embrace the challenges and adventures that lie ahead. My path may have been unexpected, but it has been a rewarding and enlightening one. I am eager to continue my education and, one day, give back to the world as a skilled and compassionate healthcare professional, thanks to the incredible opportunity that Ukraine has provided me.

#mbbs in Ukraine

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albrightmcintosh7 · 2 years

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motherraid · 3 years

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whatre your horny thoughts on zhongli im curious

-🌈Bisky

Now see now see now see Zhongli is a comfort character for me, alright? I see him as a father figure to the traveler tbh. Now listen, I'm not gonna take up too much of your time with this, the old man needs rest, yknow?

But if this man ain't schmexy-

HORNY THOUGHTS: Zhongli

I feel like Li would he a gentle lover. Not just because it's his personality, but because he's too afraid of hurting you.

Now, if we're talking about younger menace Rex Lapis... That's a whole different story. We'll focus on our present Li for now.

When it comes to Zhongli I feel like he's kinda chivalrous even in bed. He does prefer to be giving more than than receiving mainly since I feel that he's a God and he's probably had sex before (with Guizhong stfu they were lovers I've deemed it so), and he's not all that concerned with what a human could do to make a God reach his big O. That would take a LOT of work.

Now, if you WANTED to take care of him, he'd happily oblige,,, however;;

You "taking care of him" in his mind is just him being able to ravage you without any concern for your wellbeing so.. Unless you wanna be skewered on his dick like a fucking kebab regardless of how many times you tell him to stop.... No.

I have a small hc that his arms and hands glow along with his legs like in most fanart. If you didn't know this man was a God if not some form of a higher being, well,... You know now.

Honestly after what you've said a couple days ago his dick absolutely glows no doubt about it.

I don't think he'd necessarily have a daddy kink per say... He likes to use names in bed, but it's more of the standard, my love, darling, sweetheart, honey, more lovey dovey shit, you feel me?

If you call him sir in bed, he might shudder and groan into your neck, but that's as much as you'll get from nicknames alone.

Not so sure he'd have a thing for degrading (like I said, younger Rex Lapis is a WHOLE different story), like it's not really a turn on, but if you like it, he'd be happy to do it.

Listen, man's a service top, mkay? Tell him what you want, how you want it, when you like it and where to do it. He will happily oblige.

Speaking of turn ons, I also don't think he has a particularly high sex drive despite his ridiculously long stamina, yknow? There'll be some nights where he can, on a whim, fuck you waist deep onto the kitchen counter, and other nights where just being in your presence without sex is a must.

Now I know I said he doesn't like degradation, but that doesn't mean I don't think he has a secret (erosion. Ha) Corruption kink.

If you're new to sex or not confident in your abilities or body, he wants to fucking destroy you. It may sound bad, but he secretly feeds off that insecurity. Off that innocence that's coming from you.

If you admit to him after sex that you're feeling bad that you're not servicing him enough because you were a virgin, you think you're not the prettiest sight to see nude, or you're just inexperienced, don't be confused when he's on top of you again for round two. You did this to yourself.

Yes, he should be comforting you, and he'll do that afterwards since he feels bad for not doing so in the moment, but he just can't help it. You're too cute.

#.Zhongli #.genshin impact #.Zhongli x reader #.Zhongli smut #.Zhongli Hcs #.Horny thoughts #.Zhongli drabble

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fallstreakfeathers · 3 years

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[More] Obey Me Headcanons

[ I didn’t edit this at all, really, but I have around 30 headcanons so far that I’m using for my fic and would like several backups- so, I’m posting it here.)

The ‘Devildom’ is a planet that is larger than ours. ‘Hell’ refers to a part of each territory the Avatar’s govern that is reserved for retaining and torturing human souls. These areas are actually quite small compared to the rest of the land. Each environment is unique, with its own native flora, fauna, land formations, climates, and dangers.

The Devildom resides on a tall, mountain-ringed plateau that towers over the lands around it. It is not the tallest point in the demon world.

Demons have elemental affinities that also define certain weaknesses. A demon that’s used to the heat and gasses of flowing magma would have difficulties in the colder parts of the world, or fighting against a demon or creature who uses a lot of freezing attacks.

There are many places in their realm that even Demons refrain from going, or simply cannot. One such area is a vast frozen land in the far northeast that drops to temperatures low enough that even demons that are developed for icy area’s cannot survive without magical assistance. However, this also makes the area a great place for criminals and the exiled to live should they be able to fight the cold. Demons and such that failed to pass the test of the cold are frequently found encased in the tall, pointed ice spires that jut from the ground- trapped in an unending preservation until the end of days.

There’s a massive crater in one part of the world, in the land Mammon governs, that’s referred to as the ‘Fear Pit’. It’s the aftermath of a massive battle between two demons, and the entire area is cursed with illusions that prey on your fears. It gets worse the closer you are to the bottom. Demons occasionally travel to test their own resolve, though few ever make it to the center- usually opting to turn back before their fear drives them mad.

Beelzebub dislikes thunder because it sounds similar to some sounds he heard in the war

Demon’s are immortal only in that time cannot destroy them, They can still die from wounds and even disease.

Not all demons can speak human languages. There’s plenty in the Devildom/Hell who’ve never set foot in the human realm and have never bothered to learn the realms languages.

On that note, there are more than a few specific demonic dialects spoken in the devildom. The Avatars and most high nobility are required to be fluent in the most common 3 demonic languages.

Demons who came to the Devildom by falling from the Celestial Realm are not considered ‘true demons’, and many have challenged the Avatars solely because of their origins

Demons may have pacts with multiple humans. If a demon who has more than one pact is ordered to do something by multiple pact holders, the demon will obey whoever has the strongest bond with them OR the orders will cancel each other out.

Many species found in the Devildom/Hell and the Celestial Realm are not exclusive to one or the other- dragons and unicorns are found in both, for example, but with different traits and personalities. Dragons in the Devildom are ugly things that spit an acidic venom, while those in the Celestial Realm are sleek and able to shoot blasts of fire from their throats. Some creatures remain the same in each realm, but are referred to by different names. Many mythic creatures from every human culture can be found in both the Devildom and Celestial realm

Though their human forms look rather perfect, everyone who fought in the Celestial War bears a great number of physical scars, some of which affect their human guise as well

Belphegor's right eye is completely blind in all his forms. He tends to hide it in his human appearance because it’s sometimes seen as a weakness by other demons who might try to challenge him. He has the most trouble with demon’s attempting to fight him because he’s often seen as the weakest Avatar due to his sleeping habits and general outward appearance. This is, of course, a massive mistake.

Belphegor frequently wraps his tail around himself (like a hug) for comfort- particularly when he’s alone

Belphegor’s horseshoe was broken during a fight with a demon who wanted to challenge his title/status.

Demons don't usually bury their dead because many simply disappear upon death. How they disappear depends on their primary sin (Wrath erupts in a blast of fire)

Leviathan changes the order of the smiley pins on his clothes depending on his mood (green for happy/content, yellow for neutral, red for angry/upset)

Satan dislikes chocolate

Demons are practically infertile. Children born naturally (human standard) are extremely rare. As such, all demon children are cherished and protected by modern demonic societies as a whole, and intending to harm one is punished harshly.

Lucifer may have birthed Satan from rage, but a demon can create another being from any emotion so long as it’s powerful enough (love, envy, etc). This is much more common than the physical way of creating children. The offspring will generally exhibit whatever emotion spawned them and will behave accordingly to whoever the emotion was directed at. After their birth, they grow very fast until they appear 10-15 years old, and their growth slows immensely.

A specific ritual is required for a demon( or angel) and human to crossbreed with each other, as they are completely different species. It would be like trying to cross a dog with a giraffe. These births are always extremely dangerous for the human mother. There are a few exceptions to this, such as Incubi/Succubi but successful crossbreeding is still extremely rare.

The older a demon is, the more horrific their true forms are. Anyone who has existed before the Celestial War is referred to as an ‘Ancient/Old World’ demon. Those born after and those who fell are considered ‘New Age/Modern’ demons. There are a handful of creatures referred to as ‘Primordials’. These beings are neither demons nor angels, but are immensely powerful and are very secretive. Not much is known about any of them, and they rarely show themselves. They also rarely partake in the social/political conflicts of the three realms. They did not have a presence in the Celestial War.

These titles have no bearing on how civilised someone may be.

There are technically four realms known. The Celestial, Devildom, and Human realms are commonly spoken about but the fourth realm is known as ‘Oblivion’ and isn’t so much a world as it is multitudes of platforms floating throughout a nebula. It’s useless overall but is used as a prison and punishment for the worst of demonkind. Few have ever made it out, but those that have come back a blubbering, maddened shell of who they were. Diavolo and Barbatos both are capable of opening a portal to it.

All demons/Fallen have the capability to return to a monstrous form, but Ancient demons have a particularly difficult time making themselves look human again (some Ancient’s are incapable of returning at all). New Age demons are able to transform much more freely, but if the transformation is brought on by strong negative emotion (rage, fear, or a physical reaction such as pain), it takes much longer to change back

The final stage of demonic courtship involves seeing each other's truest self. This display is a form of trust in the highest regard, the goal being total acceptance of each other. It should never be taken lightly. Not every couple goes through this, but those that do form a deeply personal and permanent bond.

A demon in full form is rare outside battle, though some choose to remain in their appearance as a way of showing off.

Some demons (nobility and such) have several forms outside of their human/humanoid guises

Demons are compelled to chew on things. There are several businesses specializing in ‘demon chew toys’. Gnawing on these can release both stress and anxiety and also helps maintain healthy teeth.

Demons shed their horns, scales, teeth and fur, and will often use these shed materials in their own clothing, jewelry, and other such items. Shedding season differs for every demon- it happens to some every half year, year, couple years, or even centuries. Being given an item made from a demon’s shed is considered a personal gift

Demons can tell the basic emotional state of any human they have a pact with. Whether they react to it or care is another story.

Despite the common opinion that the Devildom doesn’t have a sun, the sky brightens every 3 human world days thanks to the passing of a dwarf star. However, it would be a mistake to believe that the demon world is devoid of light without it! There are plenty of natural light sources that provide the lands with a way to see (for those without night vision), such as glowing crystals and mushrooms, magma, etc.

The Devildom’s planet’s core burns hotter than ours, which counteracts how cold it would be otherwise (though it’s still quite chilly in many parts of the planet)

When Diavolo ordered that no human be harmed in the Devildom again, he also banned all media portraying humans as prey. These books, videos, and movies are now sold on the black markets and hoarded by those who disagree with Diavolo

#obey me #obey me headcanons #obey me headcanon #im thinking of making a map tbh #obey me belphegor #obey me fanfic #obey me fanfiction #arkwrites #Arks obey me headcanons #dont @ me about the incorrect planet science im doing this for fun and idc lmao

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theanimeview · 3 years

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WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT SKATE-LEADING☆STARS (Spoilers)

By: Peggy Sue Wood | @peggyseditorial

I have said it before, and I will say it many more times--of that I am sure. I used to be a competitive figure skater. It was a long time ago, I had stop in high school due to several consecutive head injuries but I still love and follow the sport (I also still skate, just not competitively).

When Yuri!!! on Ice was out, I loved it because it showed a lot of the cultural parts of skating. The travel, the personality types (in some cases, though not as much), the publicity, the news coverage, etc. We had cameos of famous skaters, we got to see competitions in a pretty realistic way, costuming, the dance and/or gymnastics that skaters must do on and off the ice, and so much more! (I could probably nerd about all the easter eggs and everything else all day long.) The skating in Yuri!!! on Ice is good too. The sounds are near perfect and the movements, though a bit stiff due to the use of CGI, are accurate.

THAT ASIDE I think Skate-Leading☆Stars is better. In regards to the culture of skaters, SL☆S falls way short but that’s alright. After all, this is a sports anime set in a high school where sports is an all consuming entity and reality takes a back seat to guys with eccentric hair colors. The skating is what's important here and OH LET ME TELL YOU it is near perfect.

Let’s look at this:

This is our MC, Kensei Maeshima, doing a triple axel (I think they called it a quadruple in the anime which would mean 4 spins but I counted 3 so I’m calling it a triple for now). It’s the only jump that takes off going forward in skating and is one of the most difficult jumps. All of the movement here is accurate--from the way he jumps up and straightens his legs as soon as possible with arms tucked in to help the spin, to the way he lands with a slight bend of the knee, curving around and throwing out the arms for balance (and flare).

It’s gorgeous. And it continues. When we see Kensei practicing, we get these shots:

A Sit Spin ^

Crossovers ^

And a Salchow ^ (I think it is Salchow, but if could be a Lutz--the uncertainty comes from me finding it difficult to decipher which edge he’s on before jumping).

ALL OF THESE are beautifully animated and correct--from the way he pulls his arms in quickly and straightens his legs before bending for the landing again to the way he moves after landing.

Crossovers are especially good as they help build momentum quickly before jumps, allowing a skater to travel more during their jump.

And when he falls, you see something else that they train you for in skating--how to fall. It’s literally the first thing I was taught when I began taking lessons. Let me explain--in the gif above where he falls coming out of the Salchow, we see this:

He landed on the correct foot, but was still coming out of the last half of his last turn. His other foot, which is meant to swing out, around, and behind him, before guiding the glide out of said jump, hits the ice at an angle as he lands thus causing most of the ice shaving we see happening to the top layer of ice as his other foot slides out from under him.

Now, if your feet went out from under you--the first thing that you might do automatically is go to your knees or hands to protect your fall. In skating, it’s a bit different. If you fall, your aim is to quickly move to try and let your butt or thighs take the hit while trying to avoid joints (knees, elbows, and wrists) and head injuries. What does Kensei do? He quickly turns to land on his butt first:

His hand skims the ice, but he moves it up, and off the ice as he bounces:

He then turns during the bounce, aiming to land on his thighs (less painful in my experience, and less risk of a tailbone or head injury as you continue to bounce and slide on the ice). His arm extends outward to avoid hitting his elbow directly on the ice with the weight of his upper body against it, while moving the arm up, placing his bicep closer to the head (which will help prevent his head from smacking against the ice):

Finally, he stops sliding and has, officially, “landed” his fall:

Note how the head is tucked in, resting a bit on the bicep, his elbow is not being leaned against (or broken after this fall) since it is laying flat, and how he is on his side? Yeah. That’s a pretty great fall.

You’d be a little scratched up after that if the ice was rough and since he wasn’t wearing a jacket/gloves--but you’d probably avoid bruising or any severe injuries. The reason for the fall was probably a combination of the scratched up ice (which he credits), being out of practice, and his need for more muscle training. Still, AWESOME. He’s doing really well for being as out of practice as he is.

BUT WHAT ABOUT THE STORY??

Okay--Now that I’ve nerded out about the skating I’ll talk about the larger story.

Kensei is hated by his current team. It reminds me a lot of the hate that was given towards Ren Mihashi in Big Windup! prior to transferring schools.

Kensei is obviously very talented--I mean, not everyone can come back from being off the ice FOR YEARS and do jumps like that without seriously hurting themselves and falling all over the place. It’s not like riding a bike--it’s more like highly skilled dancing... on blades... on a very slippery surface where you are likely to seriously break something. His team hates him for some reason, and act like he’s not a team player or something but he doesn’t come off that way. Perhaps a bit overly confident for their liking, but he clearly has the skills to back it up and we have proof that he can play on a team since we’re shown him playing basketball in Episode 1 and told that he’s played on and been scouted by a number of other teams at the school.

If they dislike him because of him quitting for a while, I’d say they need to get over it because we learn in the first few minutes of the anime that before Kensei’s last competition he lost both his parents--who were professional ice-skaters--in a traumatic accident.

In the flashback we see of him as a child, the reference point for why so many of his current teammates seem to hate him, we see that Kensei doesn’t seem to have any friends. In fact, our antagonist Reo Shinozaki is the one seen surrounded by people and other kids. While Reo doesn’t seem to regard any of his peers as being friends or equals, it’s pretty clear that he is at least liked more by the other kids than Kensei who is alone.

As a teen, Kensei has made several friends outside of skating which we see in the current episodes but he still hasn’t made much headway with the other skaters--though at least one of the older kids, Yukimitsu Mochizuki, is nice to him. Some of the members are obviously mad at him for something and wish he wasn’t part of the team and maybe that’s because of his boisterous personality but more likely its due to something more petty, like jealousy or envy at Kensei’s skill or some sort of lack in communication. (Remember, they were all individual competitors going against each other at one point, and when your friends are also who you actively compete against it can get pretty ugly.)

That’s not to say Kensei is without flaws. As mentioned, he is overly confident at points and makes careless statements about a few of the other members’ being of lower skill or caliber than him despite knowing that he is out of practice and that they take the sport very seriously. If I was to apply this to my own experience as a former skater, it may be like when I had a falling out with many of my skating friends after I had to stop competing and no longer attended lessons. Many of them, particularly at our young age and level, couldn’t imagine giving up skating for any reason aside from losing life or a limb. Concussions or the after effects didn’t feel real to them (nor to me), and yet the pain I felt doing simple spins or moving quickly left me in pain and feeling like I had just slammed my head against the ice. Some felt like I was quitting just as the real competitions were getting started (entering adult competitions). One friend later told me that she felt like I had quit while I was ahead, “robbing” her of the chance to beat me, as though I would have know that. A few others said that it felt like I didn’t care about them or the sport anymore when I stopped coming to group lessons. Meanwhile, I felt like I was being abandoned and lost now that I couldn’t do the one thing that had consumed much of my free time and focus in life at that age... But it’s okay now, because I found anime. (JK--it all worked out as we got older and talked things through.)

I’m sure that as the series progresses, these combative issues within the team will work themselves out and I’m looking forward to it!

Comparatively, it feels a LOT like the Free! series (you remember that swimming anime we were all obsessed with?), though the focus on ice skating that we see within the series thus far (such as news stories, the number of clubs and schools that have ice skating clubs, youtube-videos, and other media) imply that ice skating is as prevalent there as basketball or volleyball. Which, as much as I’d love that to be true, is simply not the case. It’s fictionalized, obviously, and the story is really laying on the drama pretty thick from inter-team disharmony to a larger rivalry with our antagonist that said antagonist doesn’t even seem to register, think about, or give two hoots towards.

As for the rest of the fictional universe of this world... Uh. It’s a high school sports anime so what do you expect?

Simply put, it’s a standard story for this genre.

I have not yet read the manga--but I plan to immediately. 8/10 recommend streaming on Funimation.com, and 10/10 on animation (if only for the skating). The next episode comes out on the 10th, so now is a great time to catch up!

#Big Windup!#Free!#free! iwatobi swim club #skate-leading☆stars #skateleading stars #skateleadingstars #ice skating #figure skating #yuri!!! on ice #yuri on ice #yuri on ice!!!#group skating #review #analysis #funimation #SL☆S

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iwa1zumis · 3 years

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“i love you and i like you”: passion and burnout in Haikyuu!!

tw: discussions of self harm, anxiety, burnout and breakdowns.

spoilers for the whole manga!!

okay this is probably gnna be jflkafjdklfj all over the place, but i’ve been thinking a lot lately about the difference between loving and liking something, and how haikyuu emphasises the importance of both those feelings being present when pursuing a passion.

a quick look at google (and i KNOW my college professors are cringing away in horror victor frankenstein-style @ my use of google definitions but jflajfsdk bear with me!!) demonstrates how often the concepts of love and like are conflated, with love her being framed as a sort of deeper or more intense like: “to like or enjoy very much” to be specific. but personally i’ve always thought there’s something a bit misleading about that kind of definition, since its absolutely possible to love something or someone without necessarily liking them. to take a personal example: i love debate. i debated through middle and high school, made captain of the debate team, and was constantly travelling to and fro for different tournaments. even before i started to debate formally i’d jump at the chance to do mini-debates in class, argue with and rebut parents and friends over meals and causal conversation.... you get the idea. i loved debate, and still love it dearly, but i honestly don’t think i particularly liked it much. tournaments would always fill me with the most INSANE kind of stress, i’d barely eat or sleep in the days leading up to a meet, and i’ve had more muffled bathroom breakdowns in between rebuttals than i can count. after my final year of high school, i decided against joining the debate at university. i knew that if i were to retain ANY love for the activity going into the future, i had to force myself to take a break.

so what does this solipsistic tangent have to do with haikyuu, you ask? well i have no doubt that a vast majority of the players in the series love volleyball. they’re dedicated and passionate about it. they hunger for the chance to be put on the court. but do they like to play?

1. oikawa: “i forgot that volleyball can be fun”

ofc i wouldn’t be an oikawa stan worth my salt if i didn’t start this off with the (grand) king himself!! imo one of the reasons why oikawa is such a popular and well-loved character is his constant determination to keep moving forward and playing, even in the face of seemingly insurmountable opponents and adversities (”never forget my worthless pride”, anyone?). inevitably, all the hard work and practise he put into his craft has left him with a very carefully constructed, put together playstyle-- he’s the kind of player who knows how to bring the best out of each and every teammate on the court because of the amount of time he spends observing them and playing with them. it’s an outlook and playstyle best encapsulated in his now iconic line during the second karasuno v seijoh match:

“Talent is something you make bloom, instinct is something you polish!”

in my opinion the word “polish” it super significant here-- it explicitly singles out the years and years of hard work that set a foundation for his talent and instinct to shine.

but what happens when they don’t shine? there’s no denying that oikawa is an incredibly skilled and intuitive player (something that hinata’s acknowledgment of him as the “great king” to kageyama’s “king” immediately sets out) but oikawa himself is acutely aware of the fact that he can never quite measure up to his long-time rival ushijima or his immensely talented protege kageyama. oikawa’s self described strategy to deal with opponents is to:

“Hit it until it breaks”

but what happens when hitting something again and again with your carefully honed, “polished” skills yields no results? imo there’s a very clear binary mentality drawn here-- either you hit it and it breaks, asserting your superiority; or you hit it and it doesn’t break, enforcing your inferiority. with each perceived loss against ushijima and kageyama, oikawa’s internalized logic holds his own weakness up to his own face, shaking his faith in himself as a player. if you’ll pardon the on-the-nose-metaphor: the whole “hitting it till it breaks” strategy is a two-way street, and oikawa has been hitting himself, metaphorically speaking, for a very long time. i have no doubt that he loved volleyball, passionately, through middle and high school. but with his inferiority complex growing in the face of constantly refuted results, i think he slowly began to like it less and less.

so how does oikawa get his groove back? to answer that, we’ll have to turn to the post-timeskip chapters, particularly the two chapters that deal with oikawa and hinata’s unexpected meeting in Rio (372 and 373 for anyone curious!). while reminiscing with hinata over dinner, oikawa finally reveals the event that made him want to play volleyball (as a setter, to be exact)-- as a child, he watched veteran setter jose blanco step into a game and

“... inconspicuously help[ed] the ace get his bearings again... and then simply left the court.”

oikawa’s reaction to blanco’s playstyle might just be one of my favourite panels in the chapter for how it conveys so much with such little space:

the stammer of “i-i--”, which suggests a sense of resolve and determination forming in real time, finally coalesces into the determined declaration of “i wanna be a setter too!” what i took from this is that oikawa’s admiration for-- and liking of-- blanco expresses itself in the agency with which he makes his choice, in this case, actively deciding to be a setter so that he can support players on the court like blanco did. the liking that oikawa has here is therefore inherently linked to the agency and freedom he feels here-- freedom to choose his position, and how he wants his volleyball career to develop.

this recollection of his childhood memories, and the subsequent game of beach volleyball that oikawa and hinata play afterwards, essentially push oikawa back into the mental and physical space of a child or beginner, as the manga demonstrates with panels of oikawa being forced to ditch his usual carefully developed, polished playstyle to learn the ropes of beach volleyball:

ultimately concluding with the beautiful panel transition of oikawa, as a child AND adult, celebrating after a successful play:

“It reminds me that-- I forgot that-- volleyball is fun.”

in a different country, playing a familiar game by slightly different rules and led back into the mentality and freedom of a novice after years of careful development, oikawa rediscovers his liking for the game.

2. kageyama: “when you get strong, someone stronger will rise to meet you”

moving on to the king of the court himself!! i’d argue that kageyama’s childhood memories and experiences of volleyball function almost oppositely to oikawa’s-- while oikawa has to re-access the sensation of being a beginner again to like the game along with loving it, kageyama’s process of coming to like and love volleyball come from moving away from his early experiences and into a new phase of playing-- specifically, his partnership with hinata.

one of kageyama’s defining features is his individualism-- he’s both skilled and solitary enough to prefer to, as he puts it, “play every single position on the court”. notably, he wants to become a setter because:

“[it’s] the one that touches the ball the most.”

in fact, i’d argue that kageyama’s “king of the court” attitude that he was known for in middle school is an extension of this individualistic mindset: he holds himself to extremely high standards, and expects his team-mates (as extensions of himself) to meet those very same standards. the similarities between his internal monologue and his commands to kindaichi in these two panels, for example, are strikingly, visibly similar:

there’s that near-identical intonation of “move faster, jump higher!” that implies that the way he treats his teammates is just an extension of how he treats himself-- a deeply self-critical, miserable way, as it turns out. it’s telling that for the first few chapters of a manga in which characters’ eyes literally light up when they’re happy, passionate or excited, kageyama’s eyes are drawn as pitch black, even while he’s playing.

imo the reason why hinata’s appearance, and their later partnership, is so significant for kageyama’s personal development is because he can’t treat hinata like an extension of himself. hinata challenges him and his preconcieved notions of the sport at every turn: first with his lightning-fast reflexes and raw intuition, and then with his determination to hit kageyama’s toss no matter what. in fact, the first time that kageyama’s eyes light up in the manga is, you guessed it, when he and hinata first pull off a successful “freak quick”:

during the post-timeskip chapters we’re introduced to kageyama’s backstory in much greater detail: the way in which his grandfather fostered his passion for volleyball and the timing with which his grandfather’s illness and later death left kageyama increasingly alienated, thus further enforcing his individualist mentality. but what the chapter also gave us was an explicit confirmation of a theme that had been built up from the very beginning of the story, when kageyama’s grandfather tells him:

“when you get really strong, i promise someone stronger will rise to meet you”

i’ve seen translations of the line that use both “meet” and “challenge”, and personally i’d have to say that i prefer “challenge” for what it implies-- even before hinata got strong enough to actually meet kageyama halfway he challenged him to move away from his pre-established mindset of doing everything himself, and into one where he actually comes to enjoy-- and like-- volleyball.

3. hirugami: “maybe you’ve just had your fill”

hirugami’s case is kind of a strange one-- unlike oikawa and kageyama he’s not a major character, and his relationship with volleyball only gets a single backstory chapter as opposed to a series-long arc. but i personally ADORE his mini-arc for the things it has to say about burnout, passion and moving on.

hirugami is introduced as the youngest member of a volleyball family-- his parents, older brother and older sister all play the sport. when explaining how he began to play himself, hirugami says:

“... naturally, i started to play too. because i was good at it, and it was fun.”

imo there are a lot of really interesting things to pick apart with this phrasing: the “naturally” implies a foregone conclusion but also a degree of passivity, like he himself recognises that he was swept up in his family’s influence. the “it was fun” coming AFTER “because i was good for it” also implies a degree of correlation, as though if he didn’t have the aptitude, he wouldn’t enjoy the game (a mindset markedly different to both oikawa and kageyama). as hirugami gets older, this correlation of being good ----> having fun ----> being able to play begins to reverse, and therefore manifest in increasingly self destructive ways:

the main impetus for hirugami has now become not wanting to lose, which therefore requires a degree of heightened practise and self discipline in order to achieve. notably, having fun has been reduced to an afterthought, a state that might be achieved if he wins.

the correlation of “winning” and “being good” is a slipperly slope to go down, though, something that becomes especially apparent after hirugami’s team lose a game. the frustration of being unable to reach his goal of winning manifests itself as not being “good enough”-- acting on this, hirugami seeks to punish himself for “messing up”:

the close up panel of hirugami’s “confession” after hoshiumi confronts him hits particularly hard because it taps into a feeling that i’m sure almost all of us have felt at one point or another-- the realisation that something you once both loved AND liked is now only bringing you misery:

ironically, it’s actually this acknowledgement of “not really liking volleyball that much” that acts as a catalyst for hirugami’s recovery from burnout. hoshiumi’s acknowledgement of, and reply to, hirugami’s state is seemingly simple but deeply freeing:

and honestly, why not just quit? there’s nothing tethering hirugami to volleyball, certainly nothing as serious as life or death. personally my favourite part of this panel is hoshiumi’s description of volleyball as food from which hoshiumi has “eaten his fill”-- a lovely metaphor that re-contextualizes what could be seen as “time wasted” into something productive and indeed nourishing.

when we check up on hirugami post time-skip, we find out that he has indeed quit playing volleyball in favour of going to veterinary school, but he’s seen watching the game between the jackals and adlers on his phone with an eager, fond smile on his face, implying that it was the act of moving away from the table (so to speak) after eating his fill that let him still hold on to a love and passion for the game, even though he is now interacting with it as a spectator instead of a player. and indeed that might just be why i love hirugami’s arc so much-- with it, haikyuu tells us that sometimes passion’s don’t need to be re-ignited in the same way. while oikawa and kageyama rediscover their love for, and liking of, the game through a return to childhood and the arrival of a new partner respectively, hirugami’s journey away from burnout comes from recognizing that he can step away from the volleyball court, and that the love and like will still remain.

#ari.txt #meta #hq!! meta #haikyuu meta #hq!!#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#oikawa tooru #kageyama tobio #hirugami sachirou #me pointing @ myself: it's her officer! she's the one using her english lit degree to write 3k word long metas on sports anime!!#anyways jflafjsdlk this was an absolute blast to write!! and i'd LOVE to know what you guys think about it: do you agree? disagree?#please do let me know!! :>#long post

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theglowyscorpio · 3 years

Text

all set | eren x reader

a/n: this is a story in the making, currently available at AO3 and Wattpad. If you like it, please don't hesitate to give me some kudos, leave a comment or maybe follow me on my social media! <3 Any feedback is highly appreciated since I'm just getting started!

pairing: eren yeager x female reader

tags: mature content, alternate universe (modern setting), college/university, recreational drug use, implied sexual content, M/F, F/F, the author is not religious lmao

word count: 4.3k

current chapters: 2/?

playlist: this one was made with a particular playlist in mind. they are really great songs that help to convey this chapter, so I hope you have a time to check them out! :)

a. slomosa - kevin b. upsahl - drugs c. rosenfeld - like u d. kaiba - overdose e. lil kapow - tinman f. bodega - how did this happen!?

***

all set

I lost count of how many parties I went to this week. There was one at Shina, another at... Sasha's. Wait, was it? Or Ymir's? Honestly, both their houses look fairly similar and we always see the same faces over and over again, regardless of where we are getting wasted. Definitely two at my house. The timeline is blurry at this point. If my liver could talk, it would spit out "Screw you, Eren." and I wouldn't be able to disagree.

Classes will start next week so everyone is acting like we're going to stop doing all this for the rest of the semester. That never happens.

I barely enter Reiner's house and the music is already piercing my head. My ears will soon tell me to go screw myself too. The bass was loud. But it was good.

— Hey, finally — Reiner says, giving a hard slap in my back. I can't even get mad at him because he probably didn't mean for it to hurt. Fucking strong bastard.

— Sorry. Lost track of time.

— You know where the things are — he leaves me behind and disappears through the noisy music.

It's hot inside. August has been particularly cruel this year. I'm using a black t-shirt, which is luckily pretty thin, and my black Adidas pants that are somewhat breathable. My hair is in a bun. I will probably be sweating soon, though. Reiner's AC won't do miracles with this amount of people since it is specially packed today. I guess I might see some new faces tonight, huh.

This fact already makes things more interesting.

I walk through the room and then arrive in the kitchen. Connie and Sasha are there.

— Eren!! — I barely open my mouth to talk and Sasha is already giving me whatever weird drink they made. Their drinks sometimes are... unusual, for the lack of a better word. Most of the time they are simply pure shit. They call it scout's fuel, always the same name regardless of what's inside. Maybe that's why my liver hates me so much.

— Thanks — I'm already used to the goddamn gasoline taste — I guess you both want to get us wasted tonight.

— It's our personal mission, so enjoy the fuel — Connie says laughing, raising his plastic cup. I love this duo – who doesn't? – and I can't help but laugh with them, even though it tastes so bad — Everyone is already here, come on — I follow them and find all the familiar faces I've seen all week: Bertholdt, Historia, Ymir, Mikasa, Annie, Armin, Jean, everyone.

The girls look hot, even though I'm used to them. Either way, I avoid hooking up with my friends since the last time didn't work so well. It's better to avoid Mikasa today.

We all sit together while drinking. I light a joint I had already prepared at home and say — Am I crazy or is Reiner's party bigger than usual? —, releasing the smoke a few seconds after. This one is the best grass we could get around our area, I've saved it primarily for today and now I see that might have been a great decision on my part. I'm glancing through the room and looking for some girls, might share this shit with one - or a few - of them later.

— Thank god, I was tired of seeing your ugly faces every fucking time — Jean says. The girls look at him and he rushes to add — I mean, the boys, of course. It's always nice looking at all of you, ladies.

It's not enough to avoid Annie's kick anyway — We can say the same of you, horse face.

Reiner arrives at the perfect time and explains — Since the new semester starts Monday, news about today traveled fast and we got a lot more company than usual.

— Do you know all of them, Reiner? — Historia asks — I've talked to a bunch of them tonight and there are people from all over the campus and from all years as well — Historia always looks pretty, her blonde hair shining even in the low light of the party. Guys make a line to talk to her at all parties so there's no surprise that she's already familiarized with the whole scenario. I wonder what Ymir thinks of it. Probably followed her during this little field trip.

— Hell, no — he grabs the joint of my hand and sucks deeply — I know some of them and some are Bertholdt's friends but there are some random people.

— I bet Reiner knows a lot of the girls — I take my joint back from his fingers — I assume they aren't Bertholdt's friends, though — and grin.

— Hey, I don't see you with any new company either, dude — Bertholdt tries to grab my weed as well, but I avoid his advances. He instead grabs my cup and drinks all of it, leaving me empty. He makes a funny face at the taste. Suit yourself, man, I think to myself, laughing on the inside.

— Yeah, but I'll work on it in a sec — I tease him knowing that he can't handle much of Sasha and Connie's fuel. He always knocks out before everyone. I hope he realizes he needs to stay awake to try anything with Annie. Someday. He simply never gets there.

Hange arrives almost falling over Ymir and spilling her drink on the floor in the process — I think we should all make a toast and make this last party a wild ride!!! — her yelling stabbing us louder than the music.

— Bitch, you are this fucking drunk already? — Ymir says to her, holding Hange's weight on her back — What the hell did the gasoline duo do to you?

— Okay okay, enough with the questions, let me fill your cups because this is the night! — Sasha says, just pouring all that mystery liquid that soon will go straight to our heads — Also, Reiner, where's the food?

We raise our plastic cups and Connie yells — To the new semester! — and we drink, feeling the immediate burn on our throats. It's hard being a scout.

— I need to get laid today — Jean says as he lays his back on the couch — Gonna arrive for the classes pretty motivated next week — he then rests his left arm at the back pillow, behind Mikasa's head.

— You should start roaming, then — her cold delivery puts Jean's subtle attempt at flirting six feet under the ground, as usual. It was pretty damn quick, but I could notice Mikasa glancing at me and then looking the other way. Yeah, I think I need to start roaming soon, too.

— That sounds great, then let's do that!!! — Hange grabs Jean by the arm and they disappear amongst the crowd.

— When all this fun ends, I'll be the one who will probably have to take him home after he gets slapped by some girls — Armin and Jean live with me so we normally go back together. Armin is the responsible one between us, which is not exactly hard considering how Jean and I are — Gonna at least drink some beer before that happens.

— I'll go with you, this drink sucks — Annie says, finishing the drink anyway and following him. We always drink the last drop of it, we never learn.

The girls went dancing, the music was exceptionally good today. A lot of bands I already liked plus some I have never heard before. I need to remember to ask Reiner for this playlist later. Connie was already surrounded by a different group, everyone likes to talk to him. He is popular. The rest dispersed as well and I could hear Hange's screams far away. This is going to be a night for her, indeed.

I start walking around, meeting a lot of people from my classes and others from the campus in general. I talk to all of them and drink a lot in the process, which feeds my need for nicotine every time. I grab my pack of cigarettes and while smoking, I see Levi.

— I must be dreaming — I say, letting the smoke leave my lips with a smile. It reaches him and looks at me with a deadly expression. He is smoking as well, but he only admits one specific brand of cigarettes and hates all the others. Levi usually doesn't show up at these "brat" parties, as he likes to say, since he's a few years older than us. I normally see him at Shina's, which is a popular club slash bar near our university. He's the owner so we all met him there, after going so many times. Shina has the best parties and the best drinks of all the clubs near us. And it couldn't be any other way, since Levi is a perfectionist. There's also a small stage there, where indie bands perform from time to time. My band does some gigs there sometimes.

— Hey — he replies, as cold as ever. He's Mikasa's cousin, so they have the same expressions and hard-to-approach vibe — Already high, I see.

— Always. In fact, today I hope to be higher than usual. What miracle brings you here?

— Some people from the staff decided to come here today so there are fewer brats to piss me off — he drinks what's probably a high priced whiskey and continues — and there's a new girl at the club so we have been showing her the area for a few weeks now.

— There's a lot of new girls here today — although I know Levi doesn't give a crap.

— So? — yeah, he doesn't.

Levi is a pretty successful business owner and even I have to admit that he's hot – is not only common knowledge but a mutual agreement between everyone –, so girls are always trying to get him, but he doesn't screw most of them. He doesn't fuck brats, period. He says he doesn't have the patience. That makes the girls even more desperate. He has the highest standards of every guy I know. When he was still in university – the same we all go –, he screwed not only the hottest girls but also the professors - which went after him and not the other way around. At least that's what I've heard. I think Levi never had to actively look for any girl, to be honest.

I can only laugh at his reply. That's just so him.

— If you want more stuff than what's already in your system, Floch is over there.

— I want, actually. I was going to look for him — I see Floch's red hair among some folks. Floch is usually as busy as Connie but with less than half of the charisma.

He finishes his cigarette, blowing its last white smoke into the air, and we both hear a loud HELL YEAH!! coming from all the other way across the room — Tsk, is that Hange?

— Pfft, it was before, I think it's Sasha now — he doesn't laugh at my reply. He never does. I think hell would freeze while heaven catches on fire.

I think about the music again. It's so good today, what the hell — Hey Levi, don't you think this playlist is too high quality for a Reiner party? I don't get it, his music taste is always pure trash.

— That's from our new girl — he drinks the last drops of his whiskey and starts to leave — You might find her around here — he then suddenly stops and looks at me — Don't get your hopes up, though.

I am not able to ask what he meant by that because he leaves too quickly. Time to look for Floch.

— Hey, Flo-

— Here.

— You didn't even let me finish.

— I know what you want. You are not in the mood for cocaine so you want MD instead, blah-blah-blah-blah. Is that kind of night — he pauses for mere seconds — Am I wrong, Eren?

— Nope, right as usual — Floch is the main person you go to when you need drugs. I mean, good drugs. He looks like your standard rich boy – which he is, by the way – that can do no wrong, but you can get the best stuff from him. I've always found this funny. The weed I have today was his work. He knows my taste well.

Reiner's frat house is huge, so there's plenty of room to walk. I'm approached by a bunch of girls on the way but for some reason, none of them piques my interest. I am pretty set on going after something new today and I have no problem getting laid. It happened every single day this week and it truly happens anytime I want. Which, okay, boosts my ego a little bit. Maybe a lot. I might even have hurt some girls in the process. I was never slapped though, unlike Jean. So that's a win in my book.

I see a few of my friends again, mainly Historia and Reiner, and they are talking to a girl I've never seen before.

She has long black hair and short messy bangs, the kind that goes a little above the eyebrows. I didn't know black hair was my thing until now. Her face has the perfect features, at least for me. She's wearing a sleeveless white top that is so tight that hugs her figure perfectly and makes her breasts look amazing. That type of top that shows the girl's side boob, and I'm a total sucker for those. It is also short so you can see a bit of her waist. And I don't even have to see her ass because I already know it is probably too damn good. Her light blue ripped jeans are cool as well and she has black sneakers. I like her style. She has a bunch of tattoos - a lot on her right arm, one on her left hand, and probably some that I couldn't see because they were behind her clothes. I intended to, though.

Fuck, she's hot.

Historia looks mesmerized talking to her, which is a very privileged view from where I stand because, as I've already said before, she is also beautiful. But she isn't exactly hot. This girl is. Way too much. Oh, and Reiner is there too. Whatever.

I can see a lot of guys want to approach her but none of them do. I went for it. Wasn't this night supposed to be wild?

— Hey, Eren! Guess what, Y/N is the new DJ at Shina! I was telling her how we go there all the time.

— Hi, Eren, nice to meet you — she says, with that kind of smile that people who know they are hot make. I do that too.

— Hey, Y/N — I say. And as I told you seconds before, I'm good with that type of smile as well so that's what she gets — Levi told me he came with the staff and a new girl, so I suppose that's you.

— Yeah, I'll start there next week.

— I talked to him about the party's playlist because I knew it couldn't be Reiner's.

— Yeah, it's Y/N's. She prepared it for the party when I invited the guys from Shina yesterday. We were in the same high school. — Reiner says that looking at me with a face that shows "See that, dickhead? I've known her for some years now".

— It's pretty good! I can't wait for the next party at Shina's to see your set! — Historia was always an angel.

REINER, WHERE'S THE REST OF THE ICE, MAN??, someone screamed far away.

— Shit. Catch up with you later, Y/N.

Too bad, huh, Reiner? He gives me a look that I can't quite figure out what it is, but I know for sure it wasn't a look of support. In the fucking slightest.

— I think Ymir is calling me as well, sorry!! — It was painfully obvious that Ymir wanted to make out with Historia for some time now. They never did. I think only Historia hasn't realized yet that Ymir is thirsty for her for god knows how long.

After Historia left, there was only me and her — So, by any chance, do you go to the same university as us? You look our age but Levi said you are new here — I tried asking this without looking at her body, but looking at her face was even worse. Her eyes were piercing me in the best way possible.

— I'm not exactly new, I'm from the same uni as you guys, but I took a gap year — she takes a sip of her drink — You probably never met me but I'm in the same year as you all are now.

Since Reiner knew her from high school, he also knew she was at the same university all along and never told any of the guys. Smart fucker.

— So that makes you a year older than me — I smirk at her.

— I guess it does — she smirks back as she lights up a cigarette and blows the smoke at me.

Ok, looking good so far.

I'm pretty high at this point, the MD and the music are making me horny, so I don't even bother to pretend that I'm not looking at her body. I'm looking at everything.

— You took something, didn't you?

— Do you want some? I can show you later where to get the best stuff. Anything you are in the mood for.

— I'm all set — she shows me her tongue and I see the acid. The view makes my own tongue feel lonely, maybe I should use it to steal that from her mouth. I hope she's horny as well.

We talk a lot about music since it's something that we both enjoy. She's passionate about it, I can tell. She asks about my band with true interest. Doesn't sound like small talk. She touches her hair and it makes me want to stuff my face in it. She has the smile that makes you want more. Her voice has the same effect.

The loud music allows us to talk near each other's ears. I hope she moans as loud as her playlist. The girls usually love my hair for some reason, either if it's in a messy bun as it is right now or if it's loose. They all love my green eyes too. She can see all that with somewhat detail since we are so close, even though it is a little dark here. If I take you to a room you can see me better, I almost blurb it out. I can see her too and that kills me.

She looks receptive to me but normally at this point I would be already hooking up with the girl. This time it isn't happening. I never have to work so much. I think I understand why the other guys didn't approach her before. She's a little intimidating to talk to, and that comes naturally to her – it doesn't seem to be on purpose. I flirt with her the way I normally do but she is hard to get, she hits every ball I throw. I remember what Levi said before. Oh, right.

But I'm vibing way too much at this point, I think if I touch any part of her I'll get hard immediately.

— This gap year you've mentioned... Did you go anywhere specific?

— I know it will sound cliché, but I went to Europe.

— Where in Europe?

— Everywhere — she says — I went down — the corner of her lips forming a smile — And up. Everywhere. — and I can swear she sounds flirtatious as hell. I want to bite her lip.

— That sounds... Awesome. — I think she wants to bite me too, or at least I hope she does — Was there any particular reason to leave? If that's not too much to ask.

— Hm, I was kinda... — she stops to think for a few seconds as she holds her hair up and makes a ponytail, looking at the ground, the cigarette glued to her now closed lips. Her neck became exposed, it looks soft as hell and I can't wait to bruise it. She releases the smoke, that flows into the room, and looks deep into my eyes, as deep as I want to be inside her right now — ...stressed.

I reach my limit at this point.

— I can help you with the stress if you want.

— Really? — she's looking at me with the same teasing look and I'm doing the same, so we both know that's not a question I have to answer. Her tongue quickly passes through her top lip, her mouth forming a little wet smile — I don't think I need any help though.

I threw the ball and she hit a home run. My team was out.

I was not expecting that.

We hear some of the guys from Shina calling for her — Oh, they are calling me — Y/N looks at me again and says — See you around, Eren — giving me the same fucking grin I wanted to bite before.

She walks away and I see that her ass is, as I suspected from the very beginning, too damn good.

Shit. Shit, shit, shit.

After this, some time has passed. I look at the clock. Yeah, maybe a lot. I couldn't tell before because I'm drunk and drugged. I see most of my friends, all fucking wasted. Armin is holding up pretty well, Bertholdt's is knocked down for God knows how long, Mikasa probably smoked way too much weed (who am I to judge?) and looks dead on the couch. I don't see Ymir, Historia nor Reiner - there are too many people in this house to keep count. Sasha's eating something in the kitchen, I can't see what it is, but certainly, she got hungrier than normal after smoking some pot Connie gave her. Connie always holds his drinks well, he's still talking to a lot of people. I pass in front of one of the bathrooms and Hange is there, getting everything out of her system. Oh, and Ymir. There she is, holding Hange's hair, looking as pissed as ever. Levi probably went home hours ago. Jean is making out with some chick, he's going to score tonight. To be fair, he always does, but never with Mikasa.

I saw a lot of pretty girls today and I went for none of them. They tried and I shut them down, even the ones I normally fuck. There's someone I want to taste tonight and she's nowhere to be found. The guys from Shina are missing too, so I know I won't see her today anymore. Damn.

I'm not pissed at her but I'm pissed at the situation.

— Armin, I think I'm going to take off, are you coming?

— Yeah, I'm already pretty tired — he gets up — Jean's probably going to stay here.

— Yep. Probably. — Am I pissed that Jean's getting laid? Even though I could have as well? With someone else, at least? My mood feels off.

— I'm going with you too, I've lost count of how many assholes I had to shut down today. I think I even punched a few — I don't have to look to know that's Annie speaking — You were right, Eren, is it especially crowded today. In the shittiest way possible.

— Then let's go.

— Wait, I need to get my bag first, I left it in Reiner's room.

— I can get that for you, wait up.

— It's a black one. Small.

I sign a thumbs up for her and climb the stairs. I am hundred percent sure I'm going to see someone fucking there but that's the usual. I'm pretty sure I've already seen some people screwing in the corner of the living room minutes before. No one cares.

I open the door and see Y/N in her underwear, putting her white top back on. She does indeed have other tattoos.

— Hey there! — she says smiling, as she also puts her jeans back up, making little jumps so they pass through her ass. Her hair is not in a ponytail anymore.

I say hi in a confusing way.

— I came here to get my friend's bag — I look around for milliseconds like I don't know where the hell I am until I see Reiner lying - clearly naked - under his sheets. Can't be anyone else, with that bleached hair and huge biceps.

What? Ahn?

Hey... Wait a second.

Historia? Clearly naked as well? What. The. Hell. I guess she's not exactly the angel I thought she was?

They are sort of awake, sort of sleeping, kinda like on a different planet. You know, the type of thing that happens after a really strong fuck? That sort. They look exhausted. They look destroyed. And not in a bad way. AT ALL.

— Oh, I saw a bag before. Here you go — she gives me Annie's bag. She's all dressed now. She notices my confusion, I'm too high to act any other way — I've told you I don't need any help — her eyes piercing mine for the hundredth time tonight. Her smile hurts now. Ouch.

She grabs her sneakers and walks towards me and the door:

— I'm all set.

She leaves the room as I hold Annie's bag.

Yeah. I was not expecting that.

***

Thanks for reading (if there's even anyone here lmao). Chapter 2 will be uploaded later but it can be read now at AO3 or Wattpad.

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gottawriteanegoortwo · 3 years

Text

Marmien - Let Us Have Tonight

So I accidentally landed in the Marmien tag while procrastinating in work earlier in the week. I got inspired by the idea of how Mark and Damien might officially begin a relationship if Damien were the sibling Mark fell in love with originally.

It… Was supposed to be flirty. But then it went kinda sad. With that in mind, there’s a pretty strong focus on controlling parents so I’ve stuck it under a read-more.

Word Count: 1,694

It had been a wonderful night. Since gaining full ownership of the Manor, Mark had redecorated and brought it up to the full splendour it deserved. It was the location of many parties that would allow optimal chances to brush shoulders with the crème de la crème of the city. But tonight, it was a smaller, more important affair. Mark had invited his three closest friends over for dinner and drinks to celebrate William’s arrival home from an overseas expedition. The staff were given the night off so the four could fully unwind without the worries of anyone eavesdropping. Spirits were high as they swapped stories and snacks. William had been hired for a job that required him being security during a wildlife documentation trip. The meal was accompanied with tales of William’s adventures and mishaps. The conversation was briefly interrupted as the four partook in the chaos of attempting to clean the dishes. Bubbles were blown, Mark’s hair was soaked, but it was good times, something all of them needed.

One the kitchen was (hopefully) to the chef’s standards, they returned to the living room to lounge on the chairs and chat. They shared casual conversation, and all took it in turns to quiz Celine on the course she was taking. Her parents didn’t think it necessary that a woman get a qualification, but she decided otherwise. After all, they didn’t particularly care what she did if she did it herself. But as for her twin brother?

Oh, how Mark’s heart ached when he glanced at Damien. He was the youngest child, but the only son. That meant that he was the prime focus of the parents. He was left to burden the responsibilities of the family legacy, whether he wanted it or not. His life had been plotted for him with no room for discussion on the matter. Mark was sure that they would have encouraged Damien to distance himself from Mark and William because neither men were ‘suitable’ to their impossible standards, only that they had been friends since childhood. Mark was certainly thankful for that. Damien was already a lonely soul. He couldn’t bear to think about how worse it could be. He had already spent most of the evening quiet, unable to share his own tales with how restricted his life was.

It was why he jumped the gun and asked Damien to stay on when the others were getting ready to leave. Why force him back into his cage so soon? Maybe that was why Celine agreed, throwing her brother a sympathetic look, and suggested that she too would avoid going home so Damien wouldn’t face potential punishment. Damien was grateful for the support, giving a weak chuckle when William patted his friend on the shoulder and reminded him of the soldier’s promise to ‘pummel the daylights out of your old man’ if anything did happen.

When the door closed, Mark fetched Damien a glass of water. Alcohol would not help matters right now and he knew it. He didn’t want to bring the mood down any more, not when his heart was begging to do something.

A badly kept secret in the group was this: Mark had been in love with Damien for years. Not only that, it was reciprocated.

When they were teenagers, Mark’s parents - well-known patrons of the arts with generations of money running through their veins - had hosted a party to celebrate the success of an operatic production that had been on that day. It was a rare time Damien had returned home while in university. With Celine sick at home and William in the army barracks, the pair stole away from the stuffy public spaces and hid in the library. Talk gradually shifted from the opera they had watched, to the idea of what love was and what importance it played in their families, to how they themselves viewed romance in their lives, to Mark admitting he thought Damien to be quite beautiful and that it might be the first time he’s fallen in love, to Damien quietly confessing he wants to be with Mark. Their first kiss hidden amongst the books was soft and tentative. Murmurs of love were shared with breathy whispers, but neither could do more about it beyond sharing kisses and compliments and promises to be true no matter what. Damien was caught under his parents’ thumb. If they chased this relationship further, he would have been forbidden to return to university out of the state, transferred to the local university they wanted him to attend… And would have forbidden him to see Mark again. Instead, they agreed to stay on ‘not yet’. No matter how impatient Mark was, he’d wait. No other person made him feel ‘complete’ as Damien did.

(Oh, his parents had tried to encourage him to date Celine, but he refused. Sure, she was beautiful, but waiting for Damien was one promise he would keep)

Yet as the years went by, something always happened to result in Damien asking Mark to delay his advances no matter how he wanted the opposite. Every single time, the reason would lead to Damien’s suffocating parents being the root of the problem. At least now Mark, Celine and William were old enough to work together to try and give Damien a little more independence. Even now, Celine was willing to put her neck on the line so Damien could have some time alone with Mark with William as her accomplice. Which brings us back to the present. The pair sat in silence on the couch, Damien sipping the water as he was lost in thought. Mark barely needed to tilt his head to know that Damien was weighed down by the stories Celine and William had shared throughout the evening.

“For what it’s worth, I still think you’re incredible.” Mark’s attempt to break the silence hit the nail on the head.

“Of course you would say that,” sighed Damien, not objecting when Mark draped an arm over his shoulder and pulled him close. “You’d say that no matter what.”

“I say it because it’s true. You’re such a clever, charming, intelligent, handsome young man. I’d listen to you talk all night if you’d let me.” There was another sigh, but Mark lightly squeezed his shoulder. “Hey, no, don’t start that. I mean it. You’re so well-read, you always have something insightful to say about everything. You’ve been able to give me tips during my rehearsals for a play you’d never heard of, for pity’s sake. Those good days are coming. We’re all older and wiser, while your parents are old-fashioned farts.” Damien snorted, but he reluctantly moved back so he could look Mark in the eye. There was a smile Mark loved to see, but it was tinged with sadness.

“You always manage to face everything head-on like a wall you can easily climb. I’ve always liked that about you.”

“I’m sitting on that wall ready to pull you up whenever you want. Just say the word.”

“You know I can’t.” The conversation was spiralling back to one they’ve had several times over the years - whether or not now was the ‘right’ time to do anything with their feelings. “My parents won’t approve -”

“Your parents haven’t approved of me from the day I went into the acting profession. They haven’t scared me away, I won’t let them.”

“But -” Damien’s counter vanished into nothing as Mark cupped Damien’s chin with his hand.

“Do my advances make you uncomfortable?”

“No.”

Mark leaned in.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No.”

“So then why not be selfish, my love, just for tonight?”

They were close, so painfully close that all Mark needed to do was push forward a fraction more. But he couldn’t. He had sworn to himself that this relationship was on Damien’s terms. If Damien moved away, he would respect that. He always did.

In that moment, Mark was sure that all his senses were amplified. He could hear his heart pounding in his chest. Damien was wearing the cologne Mark gifted him for his birthday and it made him feel giddy and light-headed. He let himself be mesmerised by Damien’s beautiful eyes.

He felt an arm snake around his neck. All he could taste was Damien on his lips.

Mark’s eyes fluttered closed as Damien indulged in selfishness and pressed against him. The kiss was quick to deepen as both men let the feelings they had bottled up spill out. Mark’s hands moved fast, wrapping around Damien’s waist and encouraging him to climb onto his lap. Damien broke the kiss to catch his breath.

“I love you. God, I - I need this. I need this so badly…” He trailed off with another kiss.

“Then stay. We can say you fell asleep on the couch and I hadn’t the heart to wake you. We can have tonight and then act like this never happened.” Mark was almost pleading. He would do anything if it meant he could have this moment.

“No… Fuck my parents. I love you and I’ve hidden that for too long. I don’t care what they think.” Damien’s stubbornness, at last, had kicked in; and both men knew it wasn’t the alcohol talking. Mark laughed and brushed a hand through Damien’s hair.

“I love you. And you know, I don’t think either the world nor history won’t care about us. Did you know they think a lot of the great historical figures in Ancient Greece were in same-sex relationships? If the world finds out, they’ll do whatever they can to pin us as close friends. I know I’ve read articles showing how wilfully oblivious the press can be if the couple travel in similar social circles” Tomorrow, Damien might decide to not be as open and bold about their relationship, but Mark would gleefully encourage it tonight as his hand pressed against the back of Damien’s head so they could kiss again.

Words weren’t needed now. They had each other. Without the world watching them, they could finally keep their promise from years ago as they broke apart and embraced.

For now, at least, they had tonight.

#marmien #mayor damien #actor mark #(to people who contribute to the marmien tag - you're all wonderful and fantastic)#(I humbly offer a little contribution to your efforts... Maybe I can try and write that flirty Actor another time :D )#controlling parents cw #(is there a correct term for this btw?)#(oh and also it's before Damien ever becomes mayor; so they're all in their early twenties)

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thenovelartist · 4 years

Text

His Greatest Gift - MLQC AU Headcanon

I was inspired by the “Double Seventh Time Travel” cards (and some other stories I’ve read.) After sitting on this for well over a month, I finally finished it.

Premise: The boys are given a gift; they just don’t expect that gift to be a person.

Gavin

For his acts of bravery on the battlefield, Gavin was promoted in his rank as well as endowed with a gift.

He insisted it was not necessary; Gavin never had need for material objects unless they assisted him in completing his mission.

However, he was told by his lord that it would be in his bedchamber come evening.

Gavin didn’t know what sort of gift to expect, but a girl sitting on the edge of his bed was definitely one possibility he never thought of.

People aren’t gifts, after all. They aren’t meant to be traded like some material object.

So, he sent the woman away.

However, what surprised him was her thankfulness of his action.

It was clear she hadn’t a choice in the matter. Which pissed him off even more.

When he told his lord that he could not accept a human as a gift but that no other gifts were necessary, his lord said he understood.

“Then I suppose I��ll take her as mine.”

Gavin quickly retracted his words, which only pleased his lord. It was clearly a purposeful trick, but Gavin wasn’t about to let her be taken advantage of, either.

He soon learned that she had been orphaned, her father having passed on before paying off a debt to their lord, meaning she was at his service until she paid it off.

Gavin didn’t want his lord to take further advantage of her, so she became a servant-slash-attendant to him of sorts.

He didn’t have a large dwelling, but she kept it clean as well as cooked for him when he was home off the battlefield.

And she sang.

It was accident he found that out, but the moment he heard her mellifluous voice ring through the air of his home, he knew he wanted to hear it again and again and again.

So while he didn’t ask for much of her—their agreement consisted of he gave her protection and a place to live while she kept his house and cooked so he wouldn’t have to (her cooking skills far outranked his, anyway)—he did shyly ask for her to sing more frequently.

And she happily complied.

He’d actually fallen asleep to her voice many times. It soothed and comforted him, particularly after a long day.

Her smile had a similar affect, he soon realized. The burdens of his heart would ease at the sight of her smile.

He didn’t quite understand it; the only other person who could accomplish that was his late mother.

No one other than his mother had cared for him beyond caring how useful of a pawn he could be.

But now, MC was the exception.

The amount she fussed when he came home with scars or bruises made him feel valued.

It also made his little heart go “pitter patter.”

He never thought that he would dread going out to battles or skirmishes. He just didn’t want to leave her.

But, the boy is dense and didn’t realize what that feeling was for months.

However, when he gets it, he doesn’t waste much time. (He does not count time spent weighing the potential negative effects of admitting to the woman who worked for him that he had feelings for her as ‘wasting time’.)

Any fears of his confession putting her in an awkward or uncomfortable position vanished the instant she admitted she’d also grown feelings for him.

Que walks together, shopping trips where he carried the purchases, or horseback rides where he carried her all around the territory.

But Gavin’s favorite thing was to spend any warm afternoon together in a field outside the city, where there was only the two of them resting in the golden fields that waved in the breeze. Sometimes they talked, sometimes one or both of them took a nap. It didn’t matter to Gavin.

With things going so well, it was only a matter of time before he married her.

Occasionally, he did think about how she had originally been a ‘gift’ to him, only for the purpose of warming is bed and entertaining him. How ironic that she’d become the greatest gift he’d ever received.

Kiro

He was a prince visiting a newly conquered territory.

He did hate the chaos and bloodshed of war, but he thought the cost worth it to liberate an oppressed territory.

And the people seemed to be thankful to be free of their ruthless dictator.

To show their thankfulness, they said they had prepared a gift for him.

Though he assured them it wasn’t necessary, he loved gifts and was always happy to accept.

However, he was less pleased to see that gift was a woman: the daughter of some noble family.

“She’s the finest lady in the land, your highness. For your harem.”

Except… he didn’t have a harem. And wasn’t looking to start one.

However, Savin, his advisor, accepted on the prince’s behalf.

He said something about ‘politics’ that basically meant ‘we’ll take her as a political tool.’

Kiro was not fond of it, but knew there wasn’t much that could be done.

So, he decided the only thing he could do was treat MC as well as he could.

However, she was not informed of his plan, nor was anyone else.

Which lead to MC ending up in his bedchambers that evening.

While…not where he wanted to have a conversation, he assured MC that he had no intention of using her in such a manner.

That resolve was fortified when he saw relieved tears come to her eyes.

He hated tears, so he did his best to cheer her back up and, thankfully, succeeded.

Later, she confessed to him that she’d been picked not because she was the prettiest girl in the land (her words, that Kiro strongly disagreed with; she was truly beautiful) but because her family was among the poorer of nobles, and she was not able to find a good match in time to avoid being given to the prince as a concubine.

Kiro was not happy to hear such a thing. Apparently, the nobles of this territory still needed close monitoring.

When they got back to his castle after leaving the one he’d acquired with the territory, Kiro was sure to treat her well, as well as ensuring that everything was up to her standards.

He had the ability to give her anything she wanted, but he soon discovered that material goods didn’t fascinate her as much as his kingdom itself.

So, Kiro designated a whole day to take her on a full tour of his castle and the city.

And seeing her eyes light up with wonder at their adventure was all that it took to get Kiro addicted to her smile.

From then on, he took her on any adventure he could think of. The pond behind the castle for a picnic? The kitchen for sweets? The town to escape Savin? They’ve been on all of them.

Kiro lives for these adventures. They seem to be better with her.

Her smile, her laughter, her expression of awe and wonderment… they did things to Kiro’s heart.

He’d do anything to get those little gifts from her.

Savin only gets mad when Kiro ditches his work for those adventures, which… is often.

As frustrating as it is, Savin is a little pleased to see Kiro so happy with a woman. It meant an heir might come sooner rather than later.

And when Savin voiced as such to Kiro, Kiro… couldn’t deny it.

He’d taken quite a liking to her. Her smile and laughter, how willing she was to go on adventures with him or just spend a quiet afternoon together. Don’t get him wrong, he loved it all, but it just didn’t seem like enough anymore.

The possibility of more… of taking her as his wife and having a family with her…

That was the end of Kiro’s heart. It had been stolen by a very beautiful thief.

So, with a new determination, he confessed.

His heart soared when she confessed back.

They didn’t date longer than a week before they started making plans for a wedding.

There really was no point in waiting any longer than that. Not when Kiro knew he wanted her to be his princess.

He wanted to bet that all the ladies back in from her territory were jealous now.

Though, to be fair, he didn’t realize just how precious of a gift she’d be to him back then, either. But he swore to never, ever take that for granted again.

Victor

As Emperor of his region, he knew marriage would be inevitable. He had an obligation to produce an heir.

He had plenty of women throwing themselves at him, practically begging for his attention.

And he found all of them severely lacking.

It exasperated Goldman, his right hand man.

At this point, the emperor’s court decided that it no longer mattered her status, if the emperor showed even the slightest interest in a woman, even if that was just the hint he didn’t hate her, they would make her his bride immediately.

So, a poor, unsuspecting MC arrived at the castle with a plea for her village for the emperor.

And her stubbornness, passion, and determination caught his attention.

Goldman about fainted when Victor smiled at her and answered that he would send his answer within the week.

A week later, Goldman was the one to deliver the supplies. However, unbeknownst to a certain emperor, he may have added a condition to her village receiving those supplies.

And that was how she became a bride presented to him by the court.

Victor was not amused. And he certainly was not amused that said presented bride had been coerced into his bed chambers that night.

But when he tried to send her back, she snapped. “You called me here as your bride in return for the supplies to my village, and then you have the audacity to turn me away?”

Victor’s brow furrowed as his face turned red in anger. “What do you mean ‘in return for supplies’? That was never part of the condition.”

Needless to say, a very pissed Victor had to refrain from sending people to execution right then and there.

After having rectified the situation in his court, the situation remaining was what to do with the girl.

He knew he couldn’t send her back because her village was waiting anxiously for her to become the new empress.

Which meant striking a deal with MC.

“We will keep up appearances. I will marry you in name only, but you must learn how to act like a true noble lady in order to act perfectly as my wife.”

Que lessons.

Victor supervised, AKA, micromanaged.

And MC was always fiery enough to shoot insults in retaliation.

Actually, it became the highlight of his day.

One day, Victor took over her lesson.

Oof, strict teacher.

But the pressure became too much, and MC finally snapped. “I’m doing everything I can! I can’t give you anything else. If you disliked me this much, you shouldn’t have agreed to marry me.”

Shocked at the tears in her eyes, Victor finally composed himself enough to swipe them away. “It’s not because I dislike you. It’s because I know that you’re strong enough to meet my challenge that I demand so much.”

A mutual understanding passed between the two of them then. Victor did his best to not be so strict, realizing too late that she was under so much pressure already that his strictness was not helping her.

He stopped interfering with her normal lessons, causing him to almost… miss her… a bit.

He decided to satisfy that longing by giving her quick, private lessons at the end of the day. She would show him what she learned, and he would gently correct anything he saw wrong.

And afterwards… they couldn’t bring themselves to part.

So, they would simply walk around the gardens and talk.

And soon, as a way of keeping her around even longer, Victor showed her his secret of actually enjoying using the kitchen.

While it originally surprised her, MC quickly became a more than willing taste tester.

Despite the increased amount of time together, Victor still hated parting with her.

Which was why Victor was very pleased at MC’s sudden new habit of bringing tea to his study when he was working.

It was both a blessing and a curse, because when she did, he got the honor of spending time with her, yet he also neglected his work in the process.

Eventually, Victor found that in the span of just a few months while a proper wedding ceremony was being put together, he’d come to regret the deal he made with MC for their marriage to be name only.

He… actually could see himself happy with her.

He debated telling her or not, and in the end, he was a man and confessed his feelings to her a few days before the wedding was set to take place.

He was surprised by her tears at his confession, only to be met with a confession of her own.

The deal was thrown out that night.

And on the wedding night, their marriage became one of not just name, but body and soul.

He would thank Goldman later because—while Victor still did not approve of Goldman’s methods—had it not been for his interference, Victor would not have such a precious gift in his arms now.

Lucien

He was part of a group of war lords aiming to increase their territory.

He’d conquered a large portion of territory, gaining an army that could then overthrow a comrade’s territory.

Lucien gladly did, taking on the man with no remorse or shame. In fact, he conquered with a smile.

“How dare you turn against me, Ares.”

“Forgive me, Hades,” he said, tone holding no remorse whatsoever. “But I grew tired of your… rather chaotic ambitions.”

Upon defeat, Hades was forced to surrender everything. Land, army, resources,

And a woman he kept very much hidden in his private castle.

Lucien remembered the fear in her eyes the first time they met. She was trapped in one of the rooms, and he’d caught her trying to break the lock on the window.

That fear didn’t dissipate even as a fire lit in her eyes. “I won’t cower to you!” she shouted, glaring at him even though she trembled.

In that moment, Lucien found her easily the most fascinating woman he’d ever seen. Was she driven by courage… or naïve hope?

Either way, it was clear Hades hadn’t broken her yet. Which Lucien was thankful for. She seemed far more interesting like this.

“You could waste time trying to break that lock before certainly injuring yourself in your escape from this third story room. Or, you could just let me show you the way out.”

She looked utterly shocked at that.

He chuckled. “Let’s just say your former master no longer has hold on you. Or anything, really.”

It took a moment for her to process those words. “Are you saying he’d dead?”

“No, not dead. But I do own everything he has as of now.”

“Including me?”

“Including you.”

The fire went out of her eyes a bit at that—what a shame, he quite liked it blazing so brightly—as she eventually followed him from the castle.

He did not dare stay in that castle. Frankly, burning it down would please him the most, which was what he did. He set free those who wanted to find work elsewhere and promised work at his own castle to those who wanted it.

Only a few stayed with him, most unwilling to work for a rogue warlord, but surprisingly, the girl was among them.

“I don’t have anywhere else to go,” she admitted when asked. “If you’re promising work, I’ll take it.”

Lucien found himself very pleased at that. But at the resigned look on her face, he couldn’t help tease her a bit. “Even if I assign you the job of warming my bed?”

She froze, her eyes wide with shock before a fire sparked inside them again. He liked that fire quite a bit. “I tease,” he assured before promising legitimate work for her.

Even after that, she still followed him.

How fascinating a woman she was.

It took three months to learn just how fascinating she was.

He came home wounded after a scuffle on his border. He’d already seen a battlefield doctor to treat them. He would heal just fine.

He asked MC to bring him new bandages. She did so quite quickly, and then she offered to change them for him.

Curious, he accepted.

“Don’t you fear me?” he questioned.

“Why should I?”

“I am no better than your former master.”

“That’s not true!” she cried, looking at him. “You are ruthless, but fair. The people in your territory are able to thrive under your rule.”

He paused, surprised at her words. “And what do you think of me?”

“I think you are gentler and more trustworthy than you present yourself to be. I never worry about my safety or the safety of any other maids here in your home.”

That was all it took for new feelings to spark in Lucien’s chest. Feelings that were so foreign to him yet fascinating to explore.

And he started that exploration by calling on MC to keep him company frequently.

Those meetings varied from walks in his garden to keeping company over tea.

Over time, it became clear just what those feelings in his chest were.

One day, he called her to join him in the library, where they could talk privately.

He wouldn’t confess first. He would talk in a roundabout way that got MC to admit that maybe she felt similarly close to him before he would admit his feelings for her.

He wouldn’t trap her. He would ensure that she felt like she could leave without consequences. But he also knew that if she felt at all similarly, she wouldn’t leave.

And in the end of that conversation that made MC blush bright red and Lucien smirk triumphantly, she agreed to date him.

Which would result in marriage six months later.

Lucien easily felt like the luckiest man alive. He’d conquered many territories and accumulated wealth and riches, but he could say that the only true treasure he’d ever acquired from his efforts was her.

#mlqc #mlqc headcanon #headcanons #mlqc gavin #mlqc kiro #mlqc victor #mlqc lucien #au #historical au #fluff

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