I choose to believe that once Tony Stark had Morgan, he was freaked out of his mind. Why? Well, his parental instincts were supposed to kick in once he laid eyes on her. Tony didn't identify anything like that appearing once he did exactly that. Neither did they start working after she fell asleep in his arms, or after they arrived home. They seemed to do their thing on Pepper, why didn't he feel something so very different and unfamiliar. Where is the thing that is supposed to ensure his child is safe and sound?

A few days later Morgan starts trying to take something dangerous and put it inside her mouth much like babies do. He instantly spots her doing that, and with a horrified expression in his face stops her. Pepper jokes "see? Your parent sense is working just fine."

That's when he realizes, he does have those. He simply didn't know that was what it was. The reason was pretty clear; he expected to feel something unknown to him before. Meanwhile Tony has already experienced that over the course of the previous 1.5 years.

He promptly loses his balance and breaks down in the middle of the kitchen.

Hello! I have a question I want to ask but you don't have to answer if you don't want to.

I'm recently found out about Ghost x Roach ship and looked it up along with others ghostroach fics you and other recommended.

What I'm curious is, what made you ship it? What moments of them made you ship them? What hints have you seen from them? Or was it "I think it's a neat ship"? And I don't play cod nor likely would play it in the future. But I did watch the walkthrough of the og cod mw and still trying to finish it.

If you can answer this, thank you very much!

Hi! Completely happy to answer this and it's nice to see new people getting into ghostroach haha :)

I'll admit, there honestly isn't much in terms of hints in the games/in canon that prove these two would be a good couple/in love, and it's mostly due to the early fandom efforts that helped elevate the likability of ghostroach.

That being said I'm sure me and other ghostroach shippers can agree that a large reason why this ship is so appealing is more or less the "they died together" and the "doomed love/lovers" trope that makes room for so much angst (which we all know fandoms EAT UP) <-- This is the reason why I personally ship them I just love tragic couples

The og MW games came out when I was pretty young and yk how kids tend to hyperfixate on the most random things. Mine just happened to be og Ghost, and since we play as Roach I suppose me getting into GhostRoach was a bit like self insert?

But at the same time I thought of Roach as his own character and the fact that he didn't have a backstory (or really any info), that gave people the opportunity to give Roach any personality/quirks that they desired lol.

He was like a blank canvas for writers/artists to just throw their ideas on, and it's pretty common for people to ship their OCs with the most popular character, who, for MW2, would've been Ghost.

It's harder now to find the older content, but back then I remember GhostRoach being pretty popular (or as popular as a ship from COD back then could be) and I did notice people liked to make Roach out to be Ghost's perfect dichotomy, which seems to have stuck, as a lot of GR writers/artists nowadays, including myself, like to portray these two as two opposites that attract.

And with Ghost having a hella angsty backstory combined with him being a bit of a closed off, cold, soldier, it kinda seemed inevitable that ghostroach would become a thing, with people back them headcanoning Roach as a more optimistic, wide-eyed, type of person (and we all know people LOVE the brooding, hardassed, broken character falling in love with the caring, more lively and human character)

Even tho canon doesn't really offer much, there are still small moments that people love to bring up when justifying this ship. Like when Ghost specifically requests to be teamed with Roach on the op to raid Makarov's safehouse, as well as near the end of the Loose Ends mission where Ghost is the one dragging Roach's injured body to safety whilst reassuring Roach that he's got his back. And of course, when Shepherd betrays them, Ghost screams when Roach gets shot and immediately tries to apprehend Shepherd (him screaming "No!" just sounded so shocked and pained). All these moments made it seem like Ghost really cared about Roach.

The way these two died was pretty jarring, if I remember correctly I think even news articles were talking about this plot twist and their deaths. So these two are pretty well-cemented in video game history.

At the end of the day, though, GhostRoach is a pretty "I think this is neat" kind of ship. It's definitely enhanced by the nostalgia of the old games and the factor of being able to project onto Roach as a blank character lmao, but yeah you can't deny that people are gonna hyperfixate the hell outta the pairing that's always doomed to end tragically.

I feel like I could go on and on about them but I don't want to subject y'all to my messy rambles haha but if anyone wants to add their own thoughts I'd love to see it!

haha coffins go brrr [a theory post]

So I thought about several concepts at once: the reincarnation theory, the coffin theory, and the concept of TWST boys being self-aware that they're in a game. And I thought, What if we mixed these together into one big theory?

First, let's define said concepts. The reincarnation theory is the theory that all the TWST boys are reincarnations of their respective Disney character (e.g. Riddle is reincarnated from the Queen of Hearts). The coffin theory recently gained popularity due to the manga. Basically, it's the theory that those who enroll in NRC actually died in their previous lives. It gained popularity because of how the manga panels depicting Yuuken's and Yuuka's encounter with the horse carriage looks like they were gonna get run over and killed. I call it coffin theory because it's more concise than saying "the students-were-initially-dead theory". Lastly, the concept of TWST boys being aware that they're in a game is more of a fanart/fanfic trope than a theory. It's self-explanatory. But specifically for this post, we are going to go with this idea: The boys are aware that they were just created on the spot and given a data of what their names are, their "backstory", etc.

I think you may know where this is going.

Crowley stated in the Twisted Wonderland light novel** that the coffins are a representation of the passing from your old world to your new world (referring to Night Raven College). It can be thought that the old world just represents your old life, where you were living in another country. However, many fans speculated that it could also mean that old world means the world you came from, the world you used to live in until you were killed, and thus you were transported to TWST.

Now, looking at the Great Seven, it is interesting to note that every single one of them, with the exception of the Queen of Hearts and Hades, have suffered a gruesome death.

Scar was attacked (and probably eaten) by the hyenas.

Ursula was stabbed by the hull of a sunken ship and struck by lightning.

Jafar was turned into a genie at the end of Aladdin, but in Return of Jafar, after attempting to kill Aladdin, his lamp was eventually destroyed, consequently ending his life. In the Hercules TV show, he was temporarily revived but eventually casted back to the Underworld.

Queen Grimhilde (Evil Queen) fell off a cliff.

Maleficent was stabbed by Prince Philip.

While the Queen of Hearts never died, it is important to note that she was just a figment of someone's dream. In a sense, she could have passed on the moment Alice woke up. But even then, she was not immortal—she would have passed away at some point.

Hades is interesting. As a god, he cannot die, and falling into the River Styx would not kill him. However, I like to suggest that perhaps gods are immortal because there is a people who believe in them and worship them. The moment that a religion is no longer believed in, the gods of said religion die away. Perhaps Hades could have died in that way. It's similar to the Queen of Hearts in a way.

How about everyone else who was inspired by a non-Great Seven character? All the cards that served as basis for the Heartslabyul boys were part of a dream. Hyenas and wolves are not immortal, so are eels and humans. Apples have their own death. Everyone else had to have gone through death in some way.

From here, we can say that everyone 'died'. And so what if they have all reincarnated into the next life, aka the TWST boys?

But here's the catch: they aren't born. Their "birth" was not through a mother's womb, but through the coffins of Night Raven College.

Now, why would they have memories of their childhoods, from joys to traumas?

This is where the trope of the boys being self-aware that they're in a game comes in... except they're not self-aware but somebody has written their "backstory" and "personality" instead of them forming it themselves like .. you know .. actual living people.

Now hey! Maybe it's a stretch! It definitely sounds like a stretch!

(a) Twisted Wonderland is such an odd name for a world. You have to wonder why people decided to just go along with that name instead of being more serious on what to call their world.

(b) Something about the maps of the campus, Sage Island, and the surrounding countries look like old storybook drawings. It could be me, but the coloring and the drawing look very whimsical and more reminiscent of a storybook.

(c) In the Twisted Wonderland opening, in the ending sequence where a series of images are quickly shown, there's a shot of a book in the library.

(d) Ink. When you use magic, ink builds up in your magic gem and then in your body. What do you use to write? Ink.

So in conclusion... honestly, I'm just making a crack theory here. But what if everyone did come to NRC because they died in their previous lives, except that they never lived in their new selves?

1, 3, 4, 6, 8, 9, 10, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 22, 24

choose violence ask game (life series edition)

oh my god, this is gonna be a bit long lmao, bear with me

1. the character everyone gets wrong

tango, i have rarely seen people get him just right. he's one of those characters that unfortunately gets molded into whatever the fandom needs him to be. dont blame them, i can admit i also struggled to have a good grasp of his character at first

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

i saw someone rant about how scott and cleo were just merciless bullies against pearl. which yeah, they were pretty mean to her, but the person didn't even attempt to understand scott and cleo's motivations. i know it doesn't seem much, but as someone who has a passion for that series's characters and their motivations it pissed me off that they were just ignored

4. what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

the person from the question above lol. i rarely block accounts (unless they're bots), but the post i mentioned had very disgusting vibes

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

solidaritek shippers who talk shit about flower husbands. and the opposite too, but i've seen that one more. let jimmy be loved by two people for fuck's sake!!

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

"dogwarts were the good guys actually" NO THEY FUCKING WERENT. watch the crastle or jimmy and scott (especially those two), dogwarts tried to forcefully take over all groups at one point. im not saying they were evil, they had understandable motivations...but that doesn't make them "good". i think this opinion popularized as pushback from "desert duo are the good guys" opinion (which is also wrong lol)

9. worst part of canon

the limited life ending, im sorry. not because martyn "played dirty", if anything that made the ending way better than it would've been. but the lead up from all three final perspectives were a bit underwhelming

10. worst part of fanon

sometimes people give too much power to the watchers to the point they take away autonomy from the characters. they are WATCHERS. they watch, not play. yes they put the players in the situation, but the players themselves are the ones putting the show

13. worst blorboficiation

i dont know if worst, but lizzie. she tends to be very dumbed down and infantilized. as if she didn't kill as boogey multiple times by making people trust her. dont get me wrong, she is chronically confused, but she is not a sweet innocent angel too fragile for this world

14. that one thing you see in fics all the time

i really dont know anything about hermitcraft so there might be a reason for it, but i see a lot of fics that make that server the "safe haven/place of healing in between life games". i dont really watch hc, so whenever i see it in fics and they reference stuff from that server i go ???. not complaining of course, i just try to pick up the context clues and use the general fandom knowledge i gathered through osmosis

15. that one thing you see in fanart all the time

y'know, i still don't know what those things that people put on pearl's head are. they look like bunny ears, or two feathers sticking out. something i also see a lot is all the winners in stained glass windows, sometimes in a "Hall of Winners". i dont know where it came from, but i eat it up every single time, i love it

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

not a fan of romantic smalletho. i tried, the idea of them is fun, but they're just besties in my brain

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art

ender skizz!! his 3L red skin is so iconic. also more team best as superheroes. they called themselves the heroes of the server, dress them up as that

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

i dont see people referencing cleo's almost death by tree suffocation on the first episode of third life, even though they were so many perspectives of it. narratively, it was the first time that they saw death as a possible threat. outside of the story, it was so fucking funny. they were all chilling and suddenly, tree

19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

i'll be honest, im not the biggest smut fan. i'm not against it, but i dont really get the appeal. i won't turn away an E rated fic if im interested on the concept of the overall fic, but i dont actively search them. i will say...treebark smut is always so well fucking written. the love, the devotion, the yearning, the desperation, the craving. treebark enjoyers can write a good sex scene, and you can quote me on that

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

bigb was jealous of ren and martyn in double life. he says it, out loud, multiple times. there's so many angles you can go with this and so much potential. there's the treebark angle of course, but there's also how bigb used that to avoid responsibility from having a secret soulmate behind ren's back. tbh ren and bigb's relationship overall is way too ignored for literally being the most interesting soulmate pair

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

a bit more overall mcyt than life series fandom, but any boundaries discourse, especially shipping for some reason. i have a lot of opinions, but overall i think we should stop fucking talking about "boundaries" so much. boundaries assumes a two-way interaction. and unless i am tagging the cc or putting stuff on their chats/comments or on knowingly frequented tags, what i am posting does not need their permission. does that mean "post everything, have no morals"? fuck no, but that is really the responsibility of each person. if i don't think something should be posted on the internet, i won't do it. if i see people posting that stuff, i will mute/block/report (if needed). you know what we shouldn't do? bring attention to uncomfortable shit to ccs when they are live (aiming this directly to the 2 donos in the last couple of weeks that have asked scar what his boundaries on shipping is, which he either truly doesn't understand or is purposely avoiding to reply). anyways, always causes rancid discourse and at worst full on witch hunts for shit that really doesn't matter

tag game: stranger things edition

Thank you @maniac-maniac-maniac for tagging me!

Btw anyone can play if they want to! Don't feel like you have to wait to be tagged 🦋

Ride or die ship (your otp)

I- I don't really have one... I don't like Mike and El; she's on another level. I think I have to ship a couple, it would be Argle and Jonathan?? Or Robin and Vickie. Oh! Robin and Nancy!

Most annoying ship

Mike and El... I hate how she feels as if she isn't good enough for him while she is literally the main character? And I can't have El being insecure because my girl is BITCHIN' 👏👏👏

Second favourite ship

Me and Eddie <3 <;3 <3

Favourite platonic relationship

STEVE AND ROBIN! They are platonic SOULMATES! Absolutely amazing chemistry by the actors.

Underrated ship

Joyce and Jim; they were already Mother ™ and Father ™ even before going on their date at Enzos.

Overrated ship

Mike and El, AND Steve and Nancy. I mean I do like the trope of Female Character Has Big Ambitions with Boyfriend Who Has None. But Steve and Nancy are too dissimilar. As well as Nancy and Jonathan - there is no chemistry there.

One thing I would change in canon

Eddie's death duh.

Something canon did right

... Introduce Eddie, I'm SORRY I'm being annoying but c'mon he is the best thing about the goddamn show. It was boring for me before.

A thing i'm proud of creating for the fandom PLEASE BRAG ABOUT YOURSELF I WANT TO SEE/READ YOUR ART

It's so old, but my Vampire!Eddie Boyfriend headcanons. Looking back it could do with a lot of editing, but the idea that Eddie was actually turned into a vampire because of the bat bites was brilliant (credit to whoever came up with that first).

A character who is perfect to me (wouldn't change a thing)

I got TWO, season 1-3 Hopper, because I really loved his whole punch first ask questions later. And his weight, I loved his weight. I think his weightloss in season 4 wasn't just for Stranger Things, I think he genuinely wanted to be skinnier. Which ... I mean his body his rules, but I loved him more when he was heavier tbh.

And OBVIOUSLY EDDIE. HOW DID THEY COME UP WITH THE PERFECT CHARACTER?! They could have made him a one, maybe even two sided drug dealer who couldn't graduate high school. But no, he has so much heart and SOFTNESS. I actually fell in love with him after the cafeteria scene, when he was with Chrissy. He just became this caring, open, kind guy who also had a LUNCHBOX full of fcking DRUGS.

The character I relate to the most and why

You already hate me by now because I've spoken about Eddie so much, but yeah ... Eddie. It's one of the reasons why he's so well-loved. The outsider, the one everyone thinks is weird - I think all can relate on one level or another. Especially growing up ... not so well off. Seeing Eddie live in a trailer but he's still so popular; it gives a lot of gratification (if that's the right word?)

Character(-s) I hate the most and why

Mr Wheeler - he is literally such a shITTY DAD. WTF. In his daily life he doesn't care about his family, or show any interest in them.

STEVE'S PARENTS - WHERE ARE THEY? WHAT ARE THEY DOING? I mean they could be travelling for work but that's still neglect.

Billy - if he wasn't a good looking character no one would like him. In the original script he was actually supposed to called Lucas the n-word because he's racist. And in the scenes with Lucas, there are underlying motifs that show his racism. So, yeah, I hate racists.

Martin Brenner aka Papa. Motherf*cking asshole.

Something I've learned from the fandom

Um... that the majority of us really love big-haired, soft-hearted, drug dealers? I mean okay, I don't really get into fandoms anymore because of bad past experiences. I guess what I've learnt then, is that everyone has their own opinion - doesn't mean yours is wrong or any less valid.

Three tags i seek out on ao3

I don't go on Ao3 a lot, but Hopper, basically just Hopper omg ahahha. Or soulmate AU.

A song I strongly associate with my otp/favourite character

I gots no songs I associate with my otp but I do for Eddie - The Sails of Chiron by Scorpions. It's a bit of rock but also ... really sensual?? I found it because Eddie made me fall in love with 80s heavy rock.

No pressure tagging: @sardonic-the-writer.

Hiya! :-D I've been meaning to reach out w some questions and finally decided to commit!!! ;v;

Idk if it's stated anywhere, but I'm curious what inspired the concept of the game? And what made you choose Lucien as his name bc it fits him so well <3

I'm also really curious abt the original plot of Rosalind's Lie, how much of in-game lore do we get to see? Or is it only mentioned in passing here and there? Just the idea of a game's storyline (RL) inside another game's storyline (IITAOAYD) intrigues me a lot

Sorry for the long ask ;v;!

Hii!! Thanks so much for reaching out! If you think your ask is long then wait till you read this answer haha... But on that note it's totally fine, I absolutely love reading any and all ramblings because I'm a rambler myself (it's the adhd) and like to consume new knowledge, even if I can't actually retain all of it :') (btw I love Mychael and can't wait to see what you do with the rest of the game aaa)

Honestly, the idea just kinda came out of nowhere one day (my brain does that) because of the recent(?) boom in yandere games, I was thinking what kind of yandere I might make and just thought of a concept where mc might be isekai'd into the yan's garden and he kind of immediately gets attached because they're 'untainted' by the world and other people and wants to keep it that way.

I should mention that I'm a fan of isekai genre in general because it's such a self-indulgent escape from our boring mundane lives, a kind of fresh start that a lot of people wish they had access to. Ironically though, I prefer the isekais that are more focused on living a new life as opposed to getting op powers and making waves in the world

Back to the topic, didn't really think too seriously on it till I saw the yanjam announcement and decided why not. Then I decided to add the reincarnation/otome isekai tropes into the mix to make it more interesting, except that mc is themselves and not another character. So stories like "My next life as a Villainess: All roads lead to doom!" and "Death is the only ending for the Villainess" (I promise it's two different things) come to mind for inspirations.

The game will lightly parody these popular tropes, which is why if Lucien looks like every other 'Duke of the North' with his red eyes and black hair(but less buff as I'd like because drawing men is an ongoing struggle for me) then it's on purpose. His name....... well it's honestly embarrassing but it really just comes from angel/demon inspo while talking it out with a friend, since Dukes are mostly portrayed as 'monsters' in comparison to the angelic Prince or so, when in reality it's the other way around. So its kinda like Lucifer...Lucien... yeah, not very creative but I also wanted a name that could be turned into a cute nickname(Lucy) so I decided to roll with it.

Since I gave such a specific name like "Rosalind's Lie" for the og game, I do intend to flesh out the story at some point, though for now I only have rough concepts because I'm terrible at planning lore I'm so sorry. But that somehow didn't stop me from being ambitious with it because I'm weird like that. Anyways, Rosalind's Lie is named so because the titular character Rosalind kicks off her relationships with the eligible bachelors through lies. As for why, it's because she was born in the slums and orphaned at a young age, and had only herself to rely on to survive. Thanks to that she's very street-smart and cunning, and by chance she caught the attention of a kind Baron who decides to adopt her. He was nice enough, but not very smart or ambitious, which she felt was a waste, so she decides to make her own fortune in life and marry rich - she's really more like a villainess than a heroine lol but basically she encapsulates both roles. Her "lie" in Lucien's route is basically her nicking his brooch during a ball and pretending she found it and returns it to him, which prompts him to invite her for lunch or something as thanks. And then she plans various other small schemes because he's notoriously hard to get a hold of but eventually starts liking him for real.

I'm actually not sure how much of the og lore I'll involve in yanduke, other than mc occasionally making some callbacks when they're reminded of something, because mc is isekai'd before the plot of the game starts this time, which is ofc heavily derailed and non-existent by then thanks to our yan.

Sorry for the late reply, I actually had to knock around the old noggin to articulate an answer, but again, questions like these are always welcome because it actually helps me formulate some plot points too!

fic tag game

Tagged by @outtoshatter​. Thanks for the tag. 

Rules - Recommend us 3 of YOUR fics: 1 that is “most popular” and 2 that are “hidden gems!”

Hm.  Most popular?  There’s really no contest if I’m looking at any of my stats.  

Family, Familia, ‘Ohana is by far and away my most popular fic and is my take on the NavySeal!Buck trope. I really feel this works best in post-lawsuit mess era where there was just this weird resolution of things that I wanted to explore more.  Throw in some timeline vagueness Hawaii 5-0 and a not yet together McDanno with a few borrowed SWAT characters (and a platonic Hondo/Decon slant) and you get this fic.  

Fic summary: When one family seems lost another comes back from the past. But does Buck want to return to the past or live in the present? And does his present lead to a future he wants? Only he can answer these questions but Steve at least will be there to support him.

Read Family, Familia, ‘Ohana here on AO3. 

As for more of a hidden gem type fics…. Hm. 

This is like choosing between children. 

I think I’m going to have to recommend my epic (that is still a wip and not abandoned) An Andromeda Tale, MReyder, Mass Effect Andromeda.  

Why I’m recommending it:  This is the fic that got me posting again after so many years of only being a reader and passive fandom participant. I’ve grown a lot as a writer because of this fic and I s2g it will get finished (eventually).  I don’t think you have to have a lot of knowledge of Mass Effect Andromeda to enjoy it as I’ve tried to basically immerse the reader into the universe through Scott and Reyes’ viewpoints. In fact, it might be better if you haven’t played the game because of how much I’ve totally run with vague mentions and ideas to fill in gaps and plot holes that you could drive a Mac truck through. This is my take on an epic space opera as told by two people caught in the lynchpin of fate.

Fic summary: Scott Ryder never saw his life going this way, not that anyone ever asked him his opinion. Now he's pathfinder with too many people depending on his young shoulders and trying to figure out what he actually wants for himself. Reyes Vidal, man of mystery, former pilot and now sometimes smuggler. Who knows where he came from or his motivations but he's come to Andromeda to change his destiny. What neither Scott nor Reyes could have predicted is what their lives would be once they came to Andromeda.

Read An Andromeda Tale here on AO3

As for a third recommendation…. Hm. I really could recommend a few of these that don’t get enough love. I’m going to go with my only other long form wip that is another take on my favorite Sentinel/Guide trope, The Outlaw and the Cartel Boss, Mayans MC, Miguel Galindo/Ezekiel “EZ” Reyes, Sentinel/Guide AU. 

Why this fic?  Why another wip instead of a completed fic? Because you don’t need to know much about the universe to enjoy it—again probably better if you don’t since the more you watch of the show the more impossible the main pairing of Miguel and EZ is. They’re not related in this fic and it’s very AU. It’s also possibly the fic where I’ve done the most world building outside of my MReyder epic above and my brain likes to chew on these sort of fics like a dog with a favorite bone. Odds are when i’m out on my daily run or walk it’s one of these three fics that my brain is turning over how to approach my next plot point. 

Fic summary: EZ Reyes came online with his mother’s violent death and suffered the consequences of his actions in the aftermath. When Jimenez offers him a deal to turn evidence in on the Galindo cartel, he agreed as he’d brought shame on his tribe by his actions and it was a chance at redemption that he didn’t feel he deserved. He just didn’t anticipate who his guide would be and the amount of trouble they’d generate for him. Miguel had goals—to legitimize the family business, enjoy life and his family. He didn’t anticipate any of the events that forced him online as a guide but now that he has a sentinel he’s not letting him go.

Read The Outlaw and the Cartel Boss here on AO3

Anyways, if you want complete fics of mine go read Seguir or I Wasn’t Looking Until I Found You. 

Tagging @radio-chatter​ @quietborderline​ @tkwritesdumbassassins​ @missanniewhimsy​ @bwtch​ @imsupposedtobewritting​ and anyone else who i forgot or wants to participate. No pressure as always. 

Okay, mild fandom rant time, because I keep seeing this in the Resident Evil fandom, and the only thing I can think of due to the lack of real basis is that people just prefer enemies-to-lovers or that it’s a beloved trope in the fanon.

The bit where Chris Redfield and Leon Kennedy hate each other. Wtf. Where does this come from? Why is it so popular?

We have two -- two -- moments of actual tension between the two in the entire series, and that is it. Wtf.

1) Where the pair meet in RE6. At first, they don’t know who the other one is and that is the only time you see them physically fight. You see them draw guns on each other and hold them on each other even when they recognize each other, Here’s the thing: there’s nothing in the world that could convince me they were ever going to harm the other when they recognized each other. The guns up acted as a barrier as they argued their points. At this time, they were both seriously fucked up but were calming down and talking and I think would have reached a conclusion if fake-Ada had interfered.

2) When Chris and Rebecca interrupted Leon’s vacation/private breakdown in Vendetta.The two argued angrily with each other and were clearly pissed by the other’s inability to see their point. The closest it came to physical was when Chris tried to stop Leon from drinking some more.

Now here’s why I don’t think any of that lends to the antagonistic relationship a lot of fans think they have.

In RE6, despite seeming to be on opposite sides regarding the Ada affair, despite having their guns drawn on each other, they were talking. For the first time in the entire game, Chris seemed semi-calm regarding his teams’ death after a couple moments of talking with Leon. He was actually talking to Leon about this when every other time he just snarled and grew angry. We’ll never know for sure, but I’m confident that, if fake-Ada hadn’t interfered, Chris would have gone with Leon’s argument. He was calming down, he was checking Leon’s conviction. Most importantly, when fake-Ada ran, he quickly agreed with Leon that he would try to bring Ada in alive.

At that time, Chris had been incredibly messed up. He had been beyond poor Piers’s control. He has been angry, aggressive, violent. Yet it took one meeting with Leon to remind him who he was and what he wanted. It was after Leon stopped him and told him that he trusted that he would do the right thing that Chris stopped focusing on revenge and started focusing on doing the right thing. He change his goal, worked hard to be a good partner for Piers, and when he was face-to-face with the person responsible for killing his team, he tried to bring her in.

As for Leon? No one would blame the man for having major trust issues at this point, but he doesn’t hesitate to tell Helena that he trusts Chris. Despite literally just seeing Chris planning to murder Ada, he was confident that Chris would do the right thing and try to bring her in alive. When he said he believed in Chris, everything indicated he sincerely meant it.

Okay, onto Vendetta. I’ve ranted about that scene before, but I believe much of the scene with Leon drinking and the pair arguing has been blown out of proportion. Here’s what is canon: both men had just undergone something traumatizing. Both were reacting to that in that scene. Leon’s choice: going on vacation and drinking. Maybe not the healthiest response but done in a reasonable fashion: off the job, in a safe, out-of-the-way location, literally on a vacation. The fact that he’s merrily day-drinking shows that he wasn’t doing well mentally in that scene. As for Chris? He’s furious, frustrated, emotionally compromised, who the fuck thought it was a good idea to arm him and send him on his merry way? Leon was licking his wounds in true Leon Kennedy fashion by not addressing it and Chris was licking his wounds in true Chris Redfield fashion by aggressively going after his problems and trying to blow them up.

So were they fighting? Absolutely! Was that the last time they fought in the entire movie? Yep! They were both in a rough spot and failing to communicate with the other, but when push came to shove, they clicked. It took no effort after that for them to get on the same page. They worked together smoothly and trusted each other implicitly.

In the rare times we see the pair together in canon, that is the main point with them. They trust each other. Leon states it clearly in 6 and it is shown repeatedly. They trust each other not only in a fight but to have their backs and to make the right decisions. Even after fighting, they show no grudges toward each other. They get on the same page and go forward.

If someone wants to write tension between the pair, it would be remarkably easy. RE6 is a great example of how radically different they each approach their problems. Leon’s game started with his needing to kill a good friend. He is clearly fucked up about it. It’s the first time since RE2 that we see him hesitate to kill a BOW. He is in tears. He is devastated. He screams Adam’s name when he shoots. And then? He doesn’t say another word about it for the rest of the game. Helena repeatedly mentions her sister: after apologizing to Adam’s corpse, Leon doesn’t say his name again for the rest of the game. In RE6 and Vendetta, Chris charges after his problem. He goes for revenge. He wants the bad guy’s head on a pike. In Vendetta, we see Leon literally hide away and drink. They have incredibly different responses to emotional trauma. That could be an amazing source of tension between the pair instead of some strange antagonism.

Hell, I would love to see that possible tension be addressed, but regarding just general antagonism between the two? No. I don’t see it.

Fanon Hot Takes(tm) - Part 1

Hi, today I decided to do something a little different-- I wanted to talk about common Star Fox fanon and my hot take on them.  A lot of people know about these headcanons because they’ve been so integrated into the fandom over the course of the long years.  This will include things I see that are very recurring in Star Fox fics.  I will not be linking any fics as examples and no, I will not be bashing any fics, just discussing how I think the tropes came into being and my personal thoughts on them.

To keep these posts from being super long, I’m going to break them up into several parts with me talking about various fanon things in each part.  This is Part 1 out of God-knows-how-many.  

Obvious disclaimer is obvious: These are my own personal feelings.  If you disagree, then that’s totally fine!  Variety is the spice of life and all that.

#1 - The Metal Legs Theory

Is there a better way to start the post off than by beginning with the metal legs theory?  This one has been around for ages, it seems, and I don’t actually remember where it began but I’m 99% sure it was at least popularized by Game Theory if not originating entirely from MatPat’s video.  I know the idea stems from the puppets used in the advertisements for the SNES game and how they had metal legs to help stand the puppets up.  Regardless of where or how it all began, the theory’s existed for a long time.  Adventures soft deconfirmed it with Fox’s legs appearing to be organic and Miyamoto hard deconfirmed it years later when Zero was released.  Still, due to the theory’s popularity, it exists in a lot of fanworks today-- sometimes stated as fact and sometimes as the butt of a joke. 

My hot take: Surprise, surprise... the Metal Legs Theory has always been one I’ve personally felt neutral towards.  I really don’t have an opinion... it’s just kind of there to me.  It adds a layer of grit to the Star Fox universe that I personally don’t think appropriate for the likes of SF64 and SFAdv (Assault is dark enough that it’d feel slightly more at home but even still, it feels a bit too dark) but it’s not so over-the-top that I’ve ever discounted its value entirely.  I think it could be something fun to explore if you’re wanting to do a grittier take on the series (I mean, hey, I’ve done that before, it’s fun) but as something that’s canon?  I’m... not surprised Miyamoto shot it down when it was brought up to him.

To me, a lot of dark theories about Nintendo games are really interesting to think on but it’s probably for the best for the brand that they don’t really pursue them.  I don’t think the idea of forced leg amputation (particularly to become a pilot) is a subject that should be so easily tossed around games ultimately aimed for kids.  So, really, interesting concept, fun for fanworks, but not something I’d ever want to see be made canon.  Down for amputee rep in the series though, that would be nice... but maybe without the edgy, gritty vibe this fanon brings to the table.

#2 - James is Alive Theory

I somewhat tackled this in an old theory a long time ago about why I do think James McCloud is dead so my answer for this one is probably not going to be surprising.  The character that held James’s position in the original Star Fox for SNES was Fox Sr. and I want to acknowledge that he was later confirmed to be trapped in an alternate dimension in the Itoh comics as opposed to outright killed.  SF64 paid homage to this with James appearing at the end of the “true” route as an enigmatic figure that guides Fox from the exploding Andross base.  Zero does something similar to this in its ultimate level.

James’s death has been questioned for years however, with some people believing he’s still out there somewhere and others believing him to be trapped in an alternate dimension a la Benimaru Itoh comic style.  To be fair, the games have been very flakey about the fate of James McCloud-- to the point that no one really knows who actually killed James or how James actually died.  In some renditions, he’s sucked into a black hole allegedly.  In others, he’s allegedly straight up murdered.  And we don’t really know whodunnit, with some evidence pointing to Pigma, some evidence pointing to Wolf, and a lot of evidence pointing to Andross.  I think the mythos behind James’s death is honestly really fascinating and the fact that it is a mythos is really neat in itself because it adds that layer of mystery to his character.  He’s seen as the pinnacle pilot of the Lylat System, the person that Fox is constantly being compared to, and making his demise something of a legend even to the players really adds to his mystique.  So what are my thoughts about the idea of him being alive?

My hot take: I still do think James McCloud is dead or at least in a state in which he cannot be considered alive.  At the time of SF64′s production, I think it’s safe to say that all of the lore from Star Fox Adventures had definitely not been dreamt up yet (particularly the cut content from Dinosaur Planet that talks about death and the part where Andross somehow persists as a ghost).  However, even if you take a look at only SF64, I think the evidence points to James being dead all along.  SF64 is a massive love letter to archetypes, particularly sci-fi archetypes.  And if you think about it, James’s spirit returning from the grave to help his son honestly fits the bill pretty nicely alongside the other archetypes used in the game.  Throw in Adventures, where Rareware all but put the final nail in the coffin with the Cheat Token easter egg where (presumably) a ghostly, disembodied James gives Fox encouragement... yeah, the odds aren’t seeming good for James.

I’ve talked about my theory with James at large, I think, but to recap: my personal theory is that James is stuck in limbo a la Andross style in Adventures.  He exists as a ghost of sorts that cannot move on.  Perhaps due to magic, perhaps due to his own willpower to see Andross and his legacy destroyed.  I don’t discredit the idea he’s in an alternate dimension but I wanna point out that he’s also never seen in any of the warp segments (at least to my knowledge).  He does seem to go where Andross goes or seems to linger on Venom, leading me to believe he is haunting the planet or his old enemy in some way.

In general, I don’t like the idea of “oh no, but this character was alive all along” especially when their death is such a focal point in another character’s arc (Zero especially emphasizes that Fox rebooted the team somewhat as a revenge run against Andross).  It makes it all feel a bit cheaper somehow.  But... I’ve seen fans tackle the concept with really innovative ideas so I can’t say I hate it.  I just think if it’s done, it needs to be done right and extremely sparingly.  The overuse of fake deaths in Assault is one of my biggest gripes to date about the game’s story but that’s a rant for another time.

#3 - General Pepper is a Dictator and Corneria is an Empire

Ahhhh General Pepper, you fluffy doge you.  With that face (no, we won’t talk about his Assault design), it’s hard to think that this guy could be nefarious in any way.  He is, after all, a pupper (a ‘good boi’ if you will), and dog characters are generally depicted as “good guys”.  General Pepper should be no exception, right?  Haaaaa...

I’m not entirely sure where this came from-- I’ve been directed to a particular fic that I think at the least popularized the fanon approach of General Pepper being Secretly Evil(tm).  I’ll admit, I have not read the fic entirely yet but it’s on my ever-growing backlog.  But lately, I’ve noticed a surge in people adopting the headcanon that there’s more to this fluffy, fluffy boi than what meets the eye.  His Japanese title of “shogun” does not give him any favors, either.  And when you read the Star Fox subtext, it actually paints an interesting picture of what Corneria is really like and who General Pepper really is.  You never really see any leadership outside of General Pepper.  He seems to be touted as the single leader of Corneria.  The Cornerian army seems to have bases all around various planets, even attempting to control the climate of Fichina for... reasons?  Additionally, you never see any other “good-aligned” planetary forces explicitly referred to as being “Katinan” forces or “Macbethian” forces... it’s all just under Corneria.  And I think that is interesting.  It really implies here that Corneria is an empire in its own right, though the game never calls it such (likely due to the evil connotations of empires).  

My hot take: I absolutely am on board with General Pepper being a dictator and Corneria being an empire.  There’s some pretty hefty evidence for it in the games and it adds a delightful shade of grey in an otherwise incredibly black and white set up.  The Star Fox games can be so easily boiled down to “Corneria good, Venom bad” but adding in General Pepper being a dictator... lends into question the morality of it all.  Sure, Venom is clearly bad and Andross is also very clearly bad.  But how clean are Corneria’s hands really when it seems like they’re perfectly fine colonizing whatever planet they can?

I think the added fact of General Pepper being a dictator adds a fair amount to his juxtaposition to Andross as a character.  The two are pretty heavily paralleled as the leaders of their respective factions, their existence as characters basically born from the Japanese idiom "the relationship of dogs and monkeys” (the Japanese equivalent of “fighting like cats and dogs” for us Americans). You can take it a step further and think about how Pepper is a man of war while Andross is a man of science and innovation.  And further still-- how they used to be allies but took very different paths that led them to cross each other.

And it adds another layer of creepy to Andross’s line in Zero, where Andross mocks Fox for following the orders of dogs.  Being a head scientist, Andross would have known a lot of Pepper’s dirty little secrets.  With this headcanon, Fox might come across as idealistic towards Corneria, having his own biases.  But Andross, who has been burned by General Pepper in the past, might be more aware of his and Corneria’s flaws.  It takes that standard black and white conflict of “Corneria good, Venom bad” and chucks it out the window for something more interesting.  I don’t think it’s enough to absolve Andross of his crimes-- far from it, the guy is a maniac and commits war crimes like he’s out for a stroll picking wildflowers, not a care in the world.  But Pepper being a dictator and a very morally grey character adds a layer of complexity that I think rewards fans that are paying attention and I love when people capitalize upon it in their works.  

Now make no mistake, this does add a layer of grit to the tale and I did criticize the Metal Legs Theory for doing that as well.  The difference here is that it can be subtly in the background whereas the Metal Legs Theory feels like something that is overtly gritty.  And honestly?  I never see Nintendo acknowledging Pepper openly as a dictator.  I don’t see the black and white nature of the Star Fox series ever being openly challenged... but maybe subtly.  And I think for this series, that’s perfectly fine.  I like it when developers reward players for paying attention to the worldbuilding... even though in this particular case, the idea of Star Fox helping an empire does, again, call into question the morality of it all.  Sure, Pepper will probably never be like Andross in his villainy.  But, again... how clean are his hands?  And how nice is Corneria really, knowing what we do know about its relationship with other planets?

Anyways, I could ramble on and on about Corneria, Andross, and Pepper but I think a lot of it would fit better in a separate post so I will be ending Part 1 here!  Part 2 may be out soon, it depends on my attention span.  I’m still writing out the Star Fox Assault remake concept so that’s also taken some of my time up. Hopefully, I’ll have time to make some more posts and breathe some life into the SF fanbase on here. 

Send me any fanon takes or common tropes in Star Fox fics that you’d like for me to talk about.  

This is a very vague plot but I would love to read an Emperor or very powerful WWX fic from you. I enjoy Boashan Sanren’s Emperor!WWX AU and I also love fics where WWX really is powerful and free to kick ass and just wreck shit. I really think your take on these tropes would be an interesting one and enjoyable read for all. Thank you for all the fics and your efforts in the fandom so far. Take care yourself. ☺️

fictional 18th century France in which the entire century is happening at once - part 2  

- for part 1 see: ao3 or tumblr -

Wei Wuxian came to Nie Huaisang for advice.

Well, technically, that’s not quite right, Nie Huaisang reflected. Wei Wuxian, when faced with a situation that exceeded even his formidable talents, reverted back to his old ways in times of severe crisis. Namely, he ran back to ask for advice from his adopted family – which by this point consisted only of Jiang Cheng, what with the majority of the Jiangs having perished in the infamous massacre. 

(The newspapers had dubbed it “le massacre des lotus”, a poetic way to elide the horrific mess of blood and death and despair that it had actually been.)

Naturally, Jiang Cheng didn’t have any idea what to do with the hot potato he’d been handed, and so he, and Wei Wuxian with him, came to Nie Huaisang, who always knew what to do. Who else did they have to ask?

Sure, Nie Huaisang supposed they could have gone to seek the advice of Lady Jin, formerly Jiang Yanli, Jiang Cheng’s older sister, but luckily Jiang Cheng was self-aware enough to know how much of a political disaster that would have been. Regardless of her personal merits, of which Nie Huaisang was certain there were many, the former young lady Jiang had married into the Jin family, a move that was widely viewed with suspicion. 

After all, the spectacle of yet another wealthy noble marrying another wealthy noble in exactly the sort of thing the Revolution and the abolition of noble privileges had been meant to stymie – and this particular marriage especially suspect given that everyone knew that the Jin family’s politics leaned heavily monarchist, having only just barely refrained from becoming émigrés themselves by the thought of the financial advantages they thought they could get following the fall of the Sun King.

For the Jins, the marriage had been a coup, giving them a claim to legitimacy in their new era; for the Jiangs, it was far from being the best move, politically speaking, no matter how much they swore that it was a love match.

It must have been, for the normally astute Jiangs to make such an unforced stumble.

The marriage itself was bad enough, but if Wei Wuxian, grand (if highly unorthodox) hero of the foreign wars, was seen consulting with the Jins, allowing them to influence him…well, it wouldn’t end up good for anyone, except maybe the ones who wanted to overthrow the Revolution and reestablish the rule of the Wen dynasty on the basis of the divine right of kings.

Apparently, chopping off the heads of the last set wasn’t enough to warn the rest of them off.

Fucking émigrés.

At any rate, that was how the whole mess had ended up in Nie Huaisang’s lap.

“I’m not sure what you’re looking at me to tell you,” Nie Huaisang said, idly fanning himself. That wasn’t exactly in fashion either – fans were very much seen as an affectation of the previous political order – but it was garnished with the appropriately patriotic rosette and anyway, everyone knew he liked fans, useless self-indulgent dandy that he was. Good only for throwing parties and keeping an active salon for his own entertainment, albeit one very in vogue and coincidentally very popular with all the famous revolutionary thinkers of their day.

Besides, no one in their right mind was going to claim that Nie Mingjue’s little brother wasn’t sufficiently revolutionary.

“Don’t pull your good-for-nothing stunt with me,” Jiang Cheng said, rolling his eyes at him. “I was there when it all started, remember?”

Jiang Cheng had lucked in to being there when it all started, since unlike many of the other people Nie Huaisang had so carefully invited to his salon, Jiang Cheng had been invited purely on the basis of being an old friend from school. That he’d become a hero of the Revolution instead of being imprisoned and executed after the massacre of his family by the increasingly paranoid and dictatorial Sun King was his own good fortune and hard work, naturally, but he wouldn’t have even known where to start if it hadn’t been for Nie Huaisang and his connections.

“I remember,” Nie Huaisang said. “I also recall that you and Wei Wuxian broke ties long ago, isn’t that right?”

Obviously that little façade had been entirely political.

It would have been awkward for Wei Wuxian, darling of the armies and terror of the continent, inventor of a brand new form of warfare and at least half a dozen new pieces of artillery, to be so closely tied to any one noble family, no matter their history together. It would have led to accusations that the Jiang family was seeking to take advantage of the Revolution to strengthen their own power, no matter how passionate a revolutionary Jiang Cheng was personally - the Jin sect had already started spreading rumors, casting allegations, implications, smears...

Their show of very publicly disowning each other had put an end to that.

“Don’t play dumb,” Jiang Cheng said impatiently, because he knew that Nie Huaisang knew that it was all bullshit, even if the newspapers Nie Huaisang bankrolled pretended to swallow the bait down whole. “Are you going to help us or not?”

“Of course I will,” Nie Huaisang said, rolling his eyes at him. “We’re friends. But because we’re friends, I’m going to tell you flat out that you already know what the choices ahead of you are and you know which one is the best move. What you want is for me provide you with any other options, and I’m not going to be able to do that.”

“This is just insane!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed. He was pacing around the room, face pale and cloak black, as looking dashing as always. Nie Huaisang wanted to get out his paints and force the man to pose for him and maybe a dozen or so of his closest artist friends; it would be stunning. “I can’t – why would they ask me? A few years ago, I was just an artillery captain! Son of a servant and a runaway novitiate!”

“The whole point of the Revolution was to favor merit, not birth,” Nie Huaisang reminded him. “And anyway, who cares that you were an artillery captain back then? You’re a general now. The Lion of Yiling.”

“The Menace of Yiling, the Fiend of the Burial Mounds, the Nightmare of Europe…” Jiang Cheng murmured, recounting some of the less polite versions. Nie Huaisang waved his fan at him – he wasn’t helping.

“Your brother is a general, too,” Wei Wuxian pointed out, a little desperately. 

It wouldn’t help him.

“Mm, he is. He’s also nobility of the sword - well, saber - from a line that has existed for generations, even if we did have rather ignoble origins,” Nie Huaisang said. He was not without sympathy for Wei Wuxian’s predicament, but really, some things were obvious. “We all know he’s the incorruptible and all that, but it’d be far too easy for the newspapers - and our enemies - to paint him as having done it all for his own selfish interests. There’s a reason he announced all the way back at the beginning of the wars that he wasn’t interested in political power when he was done, that he’d retired like a modern-day Cincinnatus. Who would have trusted him as commander-in-chief if he hadn’t?”

“Me,” Wei Wuxian grumbled. “Sane people, if they’re thinking straight! Your brother is incorruptible. He doesn’t even like war, even if he’s damn good at it. People should be chomping at the bit to get him to be the one – the one to – !”

“They are,” Nie Huaisang said dryly. “The innocent ones and the ones egged on by the Jin family both. They know the only way to tear down his influence is to get him to make a mistake.”

“And you won’t let him do that,” Jiang Cheng said knowingly.

Nie Huaisang snorted. What did Jiang Cheng know? “I didn’t need to say anything. He was offended on principle by the very thought of it.”

All three of them sighed in unison – Nie Huaisang a little long-suffering, Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian a bit dreamily.

It was a good thing Nie Huaisang had long ago accepted that every young man in France between the ages of twelve and thirty four, at minimum, was at least a little in love with his brother, or else he would have found it all far more aggravating than he did.

“To get back to the point,” Nie Huaisang said a moment later. “There’s simply nothing for it: you have to be the one to take it. No one else will suit half as well as you.”

“Why does someone have to take it at all?” Wei Wuxian demanded. “The principles of the Revolution -”

“Because we can’t function with these endless wars on our borders, as well as within them,” Nie Huaisang said, losing patience, and both Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian scowled, not wanting to accept the truth of what he was saying. “We need a stronger executive than we have right now, simply put. As for the form of that executive, well, the Revolution simply happened so fast that people are refusing to accept it without at least the trappings of the ancient regime - even if it’s not quite the same as the last time around. And as for why you, that’s because you can be trusted to shepherd it, to let it grow to the maturity it requires, and we will not fear you clinging to power when the time comes for it to return.”

Wei Wuxian scrubbed his face. “You trust me too much.”

“Not really,” Nie Huaisang said with a shrug. “You’re upright, moral, selfless…it helps that you’re exclusively interested in men, of course. No heirs means no dynasty.”

They both started spluttering.

“Oh, I’m sorry, had you not realized that yet?” Nie Huaisang barely bothered to hide his smirk behind his fan. “I thought it was obvious. You flirt with women for sport, not profit, and of course there’s your taste in pornography…”

“Back to the subject!” Wei Wuxian shouted, his normally shameless face flushing bright red. “Back to the subject!”

Nie Huaisang snapped his fan shut, making them both jump.

“All right,” he said. “Back to the subject: you have to become emperor, Wei Wuxian, or else someone else will, and they’ll be worse. I’m not saying that you’ll be good at it, or that you’ll enjoy it, or that it won’t end up with you exiled to some island in the middle of the ocean for thirteen years before making a miraculous return to save the country from itself –”

“Oddly specific.”

“Be quiet. What I’m saying is that you have to do it. The army supports you because you’re their darling, the people support you because of your victories in the war, the Jin and the other aristocrats support you because they think they can manipulate you through Jiang Yanli, the Lan and the other members of the Church…well, to be frank, most of them think that you’re a horrible blasphemer, which they think about all of us, but if you agree to let them crown you they’ll get over themselves and endorse you anyway. Even the foreign nations that we’re currently at war against would support your ascension to the position because the greed for power of a single man at least makes sense to them and accords with their understanding of history, as opposed to our Revolution, which is new and makes them afraid of what they might lose if it’s allowed to live. In short: it has to be you.”

Wei Wuxian sat down heavily on the couch. Jiang Cheng went over and put his hand on his shoulder.

After a few moments, he cleared his throat. “What about the rest of them?”

“The rest of them?”

“The other revolutionaries. What will they think? Your brother – he’s one of the most ardent proponents against the institution of the monarchy. How can he be happy with an empire?”

Nie Huaisang went and sat next to Wei Wuxian, pressing a nice pastry into his hand. “You went to the same classes I did, Wei Wuxian. You know that in ancient Rome, the position of Emperor - the imperator power - was originally established in the form of the ‘dictator’,” he said. “A magistrate granted absolute power in extraordinary times, for a limited time, for the purpose of rescuing the Republic.”

The most famous example of which was, of course, Cinncinatus, the man his brother was so often compared to. 

He thought Wei Wuxian would be a good example of that selflessness as well.

“I did attend class, and more often than you did,” Wei Wuxian said with an uncalled-for amount of snark. “And I remember very well that in ancient Rome, the institution of the position of Emperor meant the death of the Republic.”

“But not this time,” Nie Huaisang said confidently. “That’s what all our enemies will think, yes, but in truth you’ll be a dictator in the old-fashioned sense of the word: you’ll take the power, you’ll do the work, and then, when the Revolution has progressed enough to continue on its own, you’ll step down. My brother would support something like that. They all would.”

“But what if I don’t step down? What if the power goes to my head and I start to see myself as – as essential?”

“Three things,” Nie Huaisang said. “First, you’re an arrogant piece of work who already sees yourself as essential, and it hasn’t made you go crazy yet. Second, you’re fundamentally lazy and indolent at heart – take it from someone who knows – and while you’re very industrious if you think it’s your duty or the right thing to do, if given a chance to do the right thing by not doing work, you’d jump at the chance.”

Jiang Cheng looked as if he would protest the characterization, but Wei Wuxian nodded. He’d always loudly dreamed of retiring to the countryside to be a farmer or a mad scientist or something, and if Jiang Cheng had always thought he was joking then Nie Huaisang, at least, had not made that mistake. “And the third thing?”

“If you really do end up fucking it up, my brother will turn Baxia on you.”

Jiang Cheng choked, and Wei Wuxian snorted. 

“That’s oddly comforting, actually,” he said, and smiled. “Okay. Fine. You’re right – I’m the only one that can do it and do it right. And since that’s the case, I’ll accept: first the position of Consul, and then, as necessary, the position of Emperor. But you have to help me – you, your brother, Jiang Cheng…even Wen Qing. I insist on it; I won’t let her get executed just because of her name.”

“I can work with that, and really, no matter what the Jin say, I don’t think that’ll be a real issue. Having a daughter – well, cousin, but who’s counting – of the former dynasty working for you is a good move,” Nie Huaisang said. “Set her up with something that’s both important and yet non-political so people don’t feel threatened…revitalizing the hospitals and improving public health, maybe. She’d like that; didn’t she always want to be a doctor instead of a princess?”

“Anyone else I should make sure to add in?” Wei Wuxian asked. His eyes were avid and serious, which he rarely was in peacetime; Nie Huaisang looked forward to the day when he could be frivolous and light-hearted again. 

Still, it was good to see that he was committed.

“Jin Guangyao is the least objectionable of the Jin family, even if he is a belatedly recognized bastard,” Nie Huaisang said. “He’s more treacherous than a snake, but since we know that, we should be able to manage him appropriately. Put him in charge of the police and the spy network; he’ll do wonders with it.”

And probably end up assassinating his father, but in Nie Huaisang’s opinion that wouldn’t be that bad of a thing either. He resolved not to mention it to the others.

“Jin Zixuan isn’t objectionable,” Jiang Cheng put in.

“No, he’s very pretty,” Nie Huaisang agreed. “Your sister can hang him on her wall as artwork.”

“…he really doesn’t have many other talents, does he?”

“I’m given to understand that he spends money very well,” Nie Huaisang said dryly, and both men winced: as a dandy, Nie Huaisang had the most experience in such things. “You should also take Lan Wangji into your administration.”

“Lan Wangji?” Wei Wuxian’s face was a bit red. “Doesn’t he hate me?”

“After all the polemics he’s written in your favor, you still think he hates you? Just because of your little tussle back at school? Please get over yourself.”

“They’re in the Revolution’s favor, not mine…”

“Actually, no, he’s right,” Jiang Cheng said. “There are definitely some explicitly in your favor, and he wouldn’t do that by mistake - not with how eloquent a writer he is, even if he’s practically a mute in person. But...Nie Huaisang, what role would you put him in? He may be from a family that’s closely affiliated with the Church, but he’s not actually a priest himself – and anyway, if we were going to have to appoint an archbishop to help support us, I’d rather it went to someone like Xiao Xingchen. Everyone likes him.”

“And the fact that Xiao Xingchen is beholden to no one and interested in charitable works to the exclusion of all else is an extra bonus,” Wei Wuxian said, showing that he did, in fact, know some politics underneath his thick-skulled appearance. “But that’s a good point. What role did you have in mind for Lan Wangji?”

“I mean, ideally he’d be Empress,” Nie Huaisang said breezily, and enjoyed seeing Wei Wuxian’s face heat up and Jiang Cheng start spluttering again, “but since that’s at least ten years out, might I suggest appointing him as your chief of staff, and his brother as your foreign minister? That way you can keep Lan Wangji nice and close by, his aura of righteousness and habit of policing everyone around him will help stop the flow of corruption, and it’ll appear as though you’re using him as security against Lan Xichen – nice and distant and not at all corrupt, even as his writings continue to make the populace swoon over you. Jiang Cheng can continue to lead the navy, as he does now, and my brother the army; we can work out peacetime posts for them later on.”

“Hold up,” Wei Wuxian said. “Go back to why he’d be the Empress…? He doesn’t even like me!”

“That’s not the problem with that idea,” Jiang Cheng squawked. “Wei Wuxian..!”

Nie Huaisang went to pour drinks.

His work here was done.

101 Open MHA Gen Prompts

I had a very long ask game where people gave me fake titles and I came up with fic ideas to go with them.  Multiple people asked to use some of them as prompts, and some of my friends have lately maligned the lack of gen prompts out there, so I decided to compile them all into a single post.  Almost all of these are gen, aka not shipping, but you can do what you want I’m not your boss.  Everything is free and open to use WITH CREDIT, so have fun with my word vomit.

1. In Dreams I Had the Sun - Being the number one hero isn’t all it’a cracked up to be, Toshinori realizes early on

2. The Chainlink Fence that Held the Ocean - In his new book post-retirement, All Might opens up about his regrets, struggles with mental health, and his issues with the hero system as a whole.  The backlash is swift and intense.

3. Welcome to the Loud Silence - After an injury, Izuku is rendered deaf.

4. Water Since Turned Red - After a villain attack nearly kills All Might, the beach where Izuku used to go to find comfort now feels tainted.

5. all scrap left untouched is bound together - A group hero students who failed the provincial license exam for the third time, effectively ending their careers before they start, get together to take revenge on UA’s first years who beat them out.

6. You’ve saved more more times than you know - Times All Might saved people without his powers, just by being a cool, nice dude.

7. No Amount of Tragedy Can Justify Your Actions - A dying All for One tries to justify his centuries of cruelty to an uncaring Toshinori.

8. To Leave a Cage Locked - One for All is conscious and has a will of its own, one that doesn’t always line up with Izuku’s wellbeing.

9. Okay, who let in the Kraken? - Izuku is the reincarnation of an ancient eldritch horror.

10. keep us alive up above - Izuku and Shigaraki get trapped together somewhere.  Izuku knows he needs the villain’s help to survive and escape, but the other would rather they both die.

11. The world will revolve around me neither less - The ebbs and flows of AFO’s influence over the years.

12. More Roulette, Not Russian - Kids get their quirks swapped.

13. Patron Saints - Toshinori teaches a class about pre-quirk superhero comic characters and their influence.

14. Don't Come Back - Touya Todoroki’s first few weeks after a severe injury resulted in his father abandoning him.

15. The Blessed and the Fool - Toshinori meets up with a few of his ua classmates after retiring.

16. Not Your Sacrifice - Some of the other kids have started adopting some of Izuku’s self sacrificing habits and the teachers are concerned.

17. Break in the Storm - Villains use a power outage as an opening to break into ua.

18. One Day Those Consequences Will Finally Catch Up - Even though the teachers don’t take her concerns seriously, Inko saves every piece of evidence regarding people hurting her son.

19. a garden in their eyes - Izuku meets a fan who got injured after trying to step into a villain fight, just like he did, and it makes him question some things.

20. what could have been, if not for you - After Inko divorces him, Hisashi’s goes to the press to say All Might stole his wife and son.

21. Promised Misery - All Might finds out the severity of Bakugou’s bullying, and warns him he’s on thin ice with him.

22. Fly Up Higher, Blossom Brighter - Izuku has to write a paper for middle school about being positive, intercut with all the bullshit he has to deal with.

23. Libre Me from Hell - One of Izuku’s new quirks is spiral related.

24. No One to Blame but Yourself - Izuku’s kindness doesn’t extend to murderers, tragic backstory or not.

25. At Its Finest - Izuku accidentally gets involved in a hero commission coverup.

26. A Rising Issue - Izuku starts developing more severe side effects of his injuries.  He’s convinced he’s under the influence of a quirk, while the adults thing he’s finally gone too far hurting himself.

27. What you are in the Dark - Izuku usually keeps most of his anger to himself until he can’t.

28. nowhere to go - Inko moves into UA after their home was destroyed.

29. Something Without - My theory about the 2 OFA vestiges that are blurred out is they don’t approve of izuku as a successor.  Izuku tries to figure out why. 

30. Walking with a Ghost - Toshinori joins the OFA dreams while he’s in a coma.  He gets to reunite with nana, and is more open to Izuku about his past and feelings.  Part of his starts to wonder if it’s worth waking up, since he will die and join the others eventually.

31. Death By Crying - Izuku is affected by a quirk that will suffocate him if he expresses any emotion.

32. Justice is Subjective - The hero commission gets to Shigaraki before AFO does.  

33. Undo / Underdog - Death loop fic.  Izuku keeps reliving the day he met all might after being killed by the sludge villain.  he has to find a way to break the loop and survive, but he gets s little weaker every time he restarts.

34. Like Wildfire - A rumor that Izuku is All Might’s bio son picks up steam, and the characters have to decide whether to deny it but risk suspicion or play along and add a new layer to the lies protecting one for all.

35. Once Upon A December - All Might and Inko actually met in the past trope.

36. Some Legends Are Told - All Might’s first interview post-retirement.

37. Will The Real Mentor Please Stand Up - Aizawa considers himself the better teacher, but a lot of the kids seem to like All Might more.

38. I don't want the cure, I want the POISON! - Inko is killed in a hit and run, and Izuku becomes desperate to find the killer.

39. I will kill my heart before I dance on stage for these bigots - Izuku is interviewed as a rising star of UA, and the interviewer brings in some of his old bullies because they claimed to be his friends from middle school.  Izuku does not play along.

40. Split Ends - A quirk gives Izuku brief visions of what would have happened if he made different decisions.

41. Dreamless Sleep - A One for All dream leaves Izuku with a cryptic half-warning, and he desperately experiments to try and figure out how to trigger the visions to get the rest of it.

42. toxic flowers and pretty blades - Young Inko escapes the constricting life of her cruel wealthy family by becoming a vigilante.

43. The Suns we Orbit - Some of the other teachers believe Izuku is too codependent on Toshinori, and separate them for a time.

44. Submerged - Similar to those buried alive fics only someone’s in a box at the bottom of the ocean.

45. Deprive - Izuku also loses his stomach to an injury, and struggles to adjust to the necessary lifestyle changes.

46. The ashes fall like snow - Post Kamino cleanup.

47. Home will always be here - Inko cares for Izuku after he’s sent home due to “trouble at work study” but he refuses to clarify what that means.

48. Playing Favorites - A look at several times where Izuku was punished, while Bakugou got off scot free.

49. Elusive Dreams - Some kind of training or issue forces the kids to stay away for several consecutive day, and they start losing it.

50. Fracture - Izuku struggles through physical therapy after a severe injury that leaves his hero career in question.

51. Starlight, Starbright - Space cadet au

52. Someone in Your Corner - Gran Torino looking after Nana, Toshi, and finally Izuku through the years.

53. I cast magic missile into the darkness - Generic “the gang plays d&d” fic.

54. One Month At A Time - Izuku breaks a limb, and has to let in heal naturally over the course of several months.

55. Head Above Water - Izuku runs out of his pain meds and can’t get access to more doses for a while, so he has to endure not only the pain, but the withdrawal symptoms.

56. Are you going to leave a path to trace - All Might uses a new strategy to try and get Izuku to be less self sacrificial: what about all the young kids who are going to look up to him?

57. The View from Halfway Down - Izuku realizes that a risky move has just landed him with a potentially life threatening injury, but the fight it still going.

58. The Dust Bites Back - A villain All Might defeated early in his career is back and out for revenge.

59. The Absence of your Worth - Nighteye thinks he’s put together a rock solid case for why izuku isn’t worthy of One for All.  All Might’s response is to ask if he has something against quirkless people.

60. Behind the Screens Nobody is Afraid - All Might explains some of the context of his most popular hero videos to Izuku.  They are much more tragic than the media has spun them in hindsight.

61. Under the Light of the Moon - Someone gets turned into a werewolf.  And I ain’t talking the wattpad piss shit.  I’m talking full-on back-breaking monstrous transformations into a bloodthirsty abomination set to Bad Moon Rising.

62. some dreams were made to be broken - Bakugou crosses a line and finally gets expelled.

63. You Say You're Into Closure - Izuku finally beats Bakugou in a one on one fight fair and square, but Bakugou is a sore loser.

64. Something or Someone Missing - AU’s memories of Izuku get wiped, but those closest to him can’t help but feel an absence.

65. Too Little Too Late - Izuku’s father returns to find he’s been replaced.

66. Collecting Dust - Inko goes through the stuff Izuku didn’t take to the dorms.

67. Where the souls of wanderers go - Toshi meets up with a retired hero support group.

68. Fragility of Trust - Suspected traitor au

69. no one answered - Izuku is trapped in a cell in a building that’s collapsing in slow motion due to a quirk.

70. Eye of the Storm - One of the other kids has a panic attack for the first time between public appearances.  izuku has never seen from from the outside.

71. To Whom It May Concern - The kids find a mysterious collection of letters from previous students hidden in the ceiling of the classroom.  Some are ominous, some are incomprehensible.  Aizawa has no answers.  They enthusiastically go to try and solve the mystery within, but that excitement quickly diminishes the more they find out.

72. Of Popsicles and Ponytails - All Might gets in a discussion with the other teachers about whether the Clark Kent glasses thing would actually work.  All Might bets them it does, so he goes around town with no disguise other than his hair being up, and no one bats an eye.

73. All Men are Not Born Equal - Word gets out to the public that izuku used to be quirkless.  Everyone finds out just how deep anti-quirkless sentiments run when some begin to question whether a quirkless kid should be at ua, regardless of whether or not he has a quirk now.

74. Childhood is the kingdom where nobody dies - Something about encountering death in person for the first time being the dividing line between child and adult.

75. Sins of the Father - All for One has had many children over the centuries, and has made numerous attempts to groom them into the ideal heir with several different methods.  None of them worked though.

76. Where The Dead Come To Rest - The kids come home after a long, grueling mission where they saw some shit, and are too tired to process what they went through.  They take off their gear for plain clothes, then sit in the common room in silence long into the night, not wanting to open themselves up but also not wanting to be alone.

77. Rivalry - Nighteye tries to pit Izuku and Mirio against one another.  It goes right over Mirio’s head, but Izuku becomes convinced the other boy is in on Nighteye’s plan to wear him down until he gives up One for All.

78. A Subtle Language - All Might and Nana never said out loud that they loved each other, but little things told them that they did.  All Might hopes to pass a similar love down to his own successor.  But Izuku is very different than himself as a kid, and he needs to learn a new subtle language of affection.

79. It’s Gone - One for All stops working one day.

80. A Sight For Sore Eyes - All Might looking after Izuku in the aftermath of the second movie.

81. Loose Lips (sink ships) - Bakugou blurts out something about One for All during a rage, so the rest of the class jump on him and Izuku for answers.

82. No Expectations - Word gets out that All Might is going to choose a successor.  None of the theories or speculation online resemble Izuku in the slightest.

83. Eden was Only a Garden - Izuku gets hit with a quirk that erases some of his most traumatic memories, but in doing so loses part of who he is.

84. Run it Down - With all Izuku’s new quirks and his incredible skill, some of the other students with similar powers (Iida, Sero, Uraraka) start to feel like izuku is upstaging them.  And it affects their friendship.

85. Fool's Gold - Bakugou grows even more jealous of Izuku having One for All, and his relationship with All Might.  He thinks that if he could just prove himself to be more worthy, All Might would change his mind and name him his successor.  But in reality, he ends up jeopardizing the relationship they already have.

86. somewhere down the road - The final deadline for Nighteye’s predictions passes, and All Might lives.  He debates telling Izuku, as even though it would be a weight off the boy’s mind, he doesn’t want to jinx it.  He will still die eventually after all.

87. Just For You - All Might has certain rules and boundaries for fan interactions that he completely ignores for Izuku.

88. if these walls could talk (their whispers would be maddening) - Montage of training accidents in a ‘cursed’ ua gym

89. If Only I Could... - Nighteye tells Mirio about One for All, including that he thinks he’s more deserving than Izuku and he plans to pressure him into giving it up.  Mirio struggles with the knowledge that his mentor, someone he respected more than anything, only saw him as a replacement for All Might, meanwhile watching Izuku strain under the pressure of that mentor’s impossible expectations.

90. This is a Test Designed to Provoke an Emotional Response - shameless Blade Runner AU

91. Once and for All - Retelling of the Superman story “What’s So Funny About Truth, Justice, and the American Way?” with All Might.  Some new heroes use much more aggressive and violent tactics against villains while also upstaging All Might.  That, and there general approval from the public cause All Might to question his moral code.

92. Sitting In The Rain - Tsuyu likes to just sit out in the rain sometimes.  Not do anything, just sit there.  Some friends decide to join her.

93. At Sundown - Mysterious creatures start attacking ua every night.  The gang works tirelessly during the day to find the cause and a solution, while defending their school and each other at night.

94. The 1000th time's the charm - Uraraka has been practicing a new move in secret but they just can’t get it right.  She wants it to be perfect before showing it off.  But one attempt gets her seriously hurt while training alone at night in one of the gyms, and she’s too hurt to get up to the phone to call for help.

95. Sunflower Seeds - All Might attempts to start a garden as a new hobby.

96. What It Means To Be Human - Sun god Toshi starts living among people.

97. Eyes on Me - All Might teaches Izuku some unarmed fighting moves to defend himself from bullies.

98. one remains - Izuku has developed all but one of the quirks he’s slated to, and he has no idea what it will be.  Anxiety ensues.

99. Come Back Home - Izuku vanishes from campus and everyone assumes he was kidnapped, but in reality he ran away to try and clear his head after a depressive spiral.  He goes by train as far away as he can until he comes to his senses and calls the others.

100. I Won - Izuku accidentally managed to kill Shigaraki during a skirmish, and while everyone around him praises his heroics, he struggles to deal with the fact that he killed someone.

101. Ivory Tower - All Might grapples with how much izuku suffered as a quirkless person, how he could have done more for quirkless rights in his time as a hero, and how now people may not care as much because he’s retired.

Reminder to credit me if you use any of these prompts, and a special thanks to everyone who submitted titles!

Hi Fourangers,

First of all, I love your blog so much. It's like going through a history back when Naruto Manga chapters were released weekly and your reviews were so Golden, Hilarious and spot-on. Am a new fan though (especially an SNS fan), I just got into this fandom only this year. I don't know if you'll answer my ask, but I just wanted to try and ask you few questions and I pray that you might answer me....

1. Since you've written in a post that you were active in the eastern part of the fandom, How was chapter 698 received in Japan? Because this is the chapter I inherently realized they both love each other. Yeah, I was too late but somehow whenever they interact with each other in previous chapters I always find them to be 'Weird' for just to be friends. Chapter 698 is just blatantly obvious that they love each other. Considering Homophobia and Shounen genre, I have no idea how it was perceived over there back then in 2014.

2. Which scene made you to ship SNS?

3. As an SNS'er how do you feel about the ending, where everyone was married off when they were just 19 just to make some shitty sequel??? As a new fan, I felt betrayed and It would've been perfect if they had stopped at chapter 699, leaving an open ending.

4. How do you face with the accusation about Naruto and Sasuke as brothers and we, SNS'ers are Incest shippers??? I don't care about that Indra and Ashura thing. But Naruto himself told he considers Sasuke as his Brother couple of times. And in Chapter 699, Sasuke acknowledged, 'He finally understood what it meant'.... It's the only thing that confuses me and I don't even have an answer!!! Plus, Kishi himself gave an interview that he based Sasuke on his Brother... I really wonder how he gave such an interview when he literally made them wear necklaces with each other's faces.

5. How was Naruto and Sasuke's sexuality perceived in the fandom back then??? Man!! Kishimoto just made lot of comic reliefs on their sexuality by making Sasuke on Sai jutsu, Naruto not interested in Icha Icha but making Reverse Harem no Jutsu, Naruto was angry when Konohamaru made Boy on Boy jutsu whereas he had no problem with him doing it. LOL. And all those homoerotic posters. What do you think about their sexuality, personally??

6. Why did Kishi had to develop their bond as Soulmates with some unintentional or intentional romantic undertones, if he was eventually going to pair them up with girls??? He easily could've gave many such romantic tropes to other girls and keep the bond between N and S as purely friendship or brothers. It still would've made sense.

7. Final one, Was Naruto really Nosebleeding when Kurama made a joke about Sasuke's kiss in Chapter 572???? We had a lot of heated discussion with other shippers where they claim that it was just a splotch of snot.

Sorry for the lengthy ask....... I am so eager to know your answers and I don't want to spam your ask box by sending multiple asks.

Thanks 😊😊😊

Hey yo! Welcome new SNS fan! I'm so glad that you joined us and I'll try to answer as best as I can. I'm not very active here on tumblr (except browsing lol) but your ask was such a delight to read.

1. I honestly don't remember. I think I didn't follow the japanese boards until the eventual 699-700 disaster. People were craving for reactions and I was curious about it too lol. And well...it's been years, I doubt I'll be able to find the reactions from that time. Imo, most readers don't care much about pairings, they just wanted to read about power-ups and abilities and the basic Naruto Vs Sasuke. Though there are some backhanded jokes about how gay Naruto is for Sasuke.

2. Hah. It's going to be very anti-climatic but it was when Naruto and Sakura were eating in Ichiraku Ramen. Naruto just used Rasenshuriken against Kakuzu and he busted his arm. Sakura was healing his arm and her attention was focused on Naruto. I used to be a NaruSaku shipper so I thought "Oh hey! This is the moment that Naruto would have a candid romantic moment!" But nope. He talked about Sasuke. And I was already getting suspicious about Sasuke's feelings towards Naruto ya know? And the whole "SASUKE IS MIINEEEEEE" in Orochimaru's lair. It was that moment I thought "you only have Sasuke in your head don't you, Naruto?" and started shipping SNS.

3. Hooo boy was I surprised when it was suddenly revealed that they had the basic heteronormative, boring marriage with bunch of clones of themselves. Everyone thought that it was almost like a bad fanfiction come true and some thought that it was fake. It was a pandemonium lolololol. I also thought that it was too lame to be true and lo and behold, when it came true I was floored. And then whenever Kishimoto threw new material, I got insanely pissed off because S*arada and B*ruto becoming pairing material is ok because they are a girl and a boy, and then they paralleled with Naruto and Sasuke which are only FRIENDS because they are both men. ARGH. Open ending was what Kishimoto planned from the very beginning but wrote a sequel to earn more money.

In that aspect, I made peace with it because of the whole anime/manga industry. I learned that, as a mangaka, you don't earn a lot of money with selling books, but rather with merchandise and profiting with sales right. And that guy have a family to raise, have two kids (which is hilarious about how B*ruto movie is his self-insert story), he needs a steady income. Also, I read reports about how anime studios are so poor and animators don't receive a decent income not to mention they are overstaffed and tired, and B*ruto is a good money cow for them to earn money so they can invest later on other anime they have more passion about it. So even though I hate this story with a strength of thousands suns, they are putting meal on people's tables and making them pay rents. I'm ok.

4. Lemme roll my eyes because in the Last movie they said that Hinata is related to Kaguya and so is the Uzumaki and Uchiha clan so they are all related woo hoo. But in the aspect of brothers because reincarnations bla bla bla, didn't Naruto himself said that he's no longer that brother, he's himself? Hmm...I gotta re-read it. One day. Maybe. lol. But I'm sure that he said "Sasuke is not my brother but I'm sure we'll understand well as friends" so there. Honestly, there are a lot of interviews out there and a lot of them are fake, so I'd always take the interviews with a grain of salt lololol. I do know from artbooks that Kishimoto wanted to create Sasuke as a rival-esque character and that was it. As he was developing Sasuke and Naruto's relationship, since he liked the whole yin-yang concept, whenever he wrote Naruto's story, Sasuke's was developed at the same time as his shadow.

5. I can tell from Naruto Forums (I used to participate back in that day) MOST of the non-shippers thought it was gay as hell, but you know...it was a relic of that time. While they thought it was gay, they didn't put too much thought about you know? Because it was shounen, and we knew that it was a joke that it couldn't be taken seriously. Of course, in the SNS fandom, we did make more analysis and there were a lot of instance when Naruto and Sasuke's sexuality was questioned. Some other non-shippers also thought that Naruto was totes gay for Sasuke (including a IRL friend).

Imo, Naruto is definitely bisexual in my view. Sasuke I think he's asexual or gay. He's attracted to Naruto, but mostly because of his connection to him, not because of his physical attributes, so yeah...asexual. Or Pansexual. Sasuke is more complicated lmao. Imo, Naruto could be pansexual too, come to think about it. Yeah, I guess both being pansexual can be valid.

6. He developed Naruto and Sasuke being soulmates from the very beginning, that was proven in his comments in artbooks and in the manga. He probably created with the intention of making it purely platonic, going beyond physical ties. Then he shot himself on the foot by drawing Naruto thinking about Sasuke on bed, talking about how Sasuke is cool, meanwhile Sasuke waxing poetic about how Naruto saved him. What gives? Lol. Yeah, I think he got too enamored writing their relationship that he didn't have time to write romantic ones. What I noticed that Sakura's popularity never was really high, so I could see some editors putting their fingers all over it and making her less relevant. Also, Kishimoto didn't know how to handle her, so when she got her time to shine was the whole fake confession disaster. Coupled with Kishimoto sexism and, in his words (Kurenai's flashback), women are useful to spout more babies, women was never really relevant in his story, unfortunately. Even Kaguya who was technically the big bad boss, was never really fleshed out in comparison to Madara. So the null het romantic moments it's not because he wanted to elevate SNS moments, it's more about how he's incompetent about it. It's either Hinata slowly elevating to a relevant status because forced interaction (Pain's sacrifice and Neji's death) or Sakura being obligated to be pining over Sasuke because she's a girl. It's even more painful to see that, if we ignore B*ruto, both girls are shown to be just talking with their kids and dusting shelves, basically being housewives, even though thorough the story (especially Sakura) it was implied that both of them have much more potential than being their husband accessories.

7. It was a splotch of snot. I can confirm myself lol. Whenever the chapter is out and fans would scan it to scanlate it, the editor usually would amp up contrast to max. So usually the lines get much more thicker than usual, when you read the official release which gets straight from the source, you can notice how the lines are more delicate.

Oh lol...but then we also have a lot of controversy about translating style. THAT one is a whole new can of worms to open.

Man I had fun answering your questions! Please send more :P

The Monster of Piedras Blancas

At some point I realized that I'd done an awful lot of fishman movies on this blog, so I decided I needed a tag for them.  I chose #it's beginning to look a lot like fishmen, after a rather amusing musical version of The Shadow over Innsmouth that you can find on YouTube.  Most of them are less fun than said video, and this one very much so.  It qualifies itself for MST3King by featuring Forrest Lewis from The Thing that Couldn't Die, Don Sullivan from The Giant Gila Monster, and Jeanne Carmen from Untamed Youth.

Some lonely people feed the birds or stray cats in their neighbourhood. The lighthouse keeper of Piedras Blancas doesn't have any of those, so he feeds the fish monster that lives below the rocks.  As long as he does this, it only occasionally kills people when they wander into its territory, but trouble begins when the grocer fails to save enough meat scraps to satisfy it.  Soon the hungry beast is lopping heads off right and left and draining the bodies of blood!  The local constable thinks he may have a homicidal maniac on his hands, but marine biologist Fred identifies a shed scale at the scene as belonging to a Diplovertebron, a beast thought to be long-extinct.

Diplovertebron is an actual creature with its own Wikipedia article and everything. According to said article, it was a lizardy sort of a thing that lived in what is now the Czech Republic three hundred million years ago, and was around half a meter long.  It's a very obscure and not terribly threatening animal, and I have a hard time imagining why the writers chose it, of all extinct creepy-crawlies, to be their monster's ancestor.  It doesn't even have a very interesting name. 'Diplovertebron' is quite technical-sounding and has too many syllables to roll nicely off the tongue.  Why not pick something that at least sounds scary?

The Monster of Piedras Blancas is a bloated, sedate movie.  It knows that movies need breaks between the actiony bits... but its actiony bits have no real action, and the talky scenes it inserts to space them out are deathly dull and contribute almost nothing.  There's a bit where two characters discuss a victim's time of death in great detail, taking into account things like a spilled bottle of ink, that would have reduced Joel to tears.  It almost becomes a joke when Fred and the Doctor discuss the minutiae of Diplovertebron scales, while the constable sits there growling impatiently at them.  When even your characters think the movie is too slow, you have a problem.

Everything that might possibly be exciting takes place off-screen.  This is fine and even expected during the 'building suspense' parts – of course we don't see the deaths of the fishermen or the grocer. The bit where we first see the entire monster, when characters open a walk-in fridge and it lumbers out holding a severed head, is honestly pretty well-done.  After that, however, we should finally get to see some monster-eating-people scenes... but since this is yet another stupid rubber fishman suit a la the She-Creature, all it's actually capable of is slapping a few guys and then fleeing.  It supposedly kills a couple of gun-toting rednecks, but the fight happens elsewhere while the audience watches Fred and the doctor fart around in a cave.  We don't see the monster again until it inevitably kidnaps the lighthouse-keeper's cute daughter at the climax.

The severed head is pretty plasticky and looks nothing like the guy it supposedly came from, but an effort was made and I respect that. There are veins sticking out the bottom of it and a really creepy bit where we find it in the monster's lair with crabs crawling over it.

As the movie draws closer to its climax, the men in the town sit down and have a good think about how they're going to defeat it. They know they can't overpower it, and it seems to be reasonably intelligent, so they've decided they're going to have to outwit it. Their big plan for doing so is... throw a net over it.

I expected this to fail spectacularly, but what actually happened was even dumber.  I will not spoil the last thirty seconds of this movie for you, because it's funny as hell, but let's just say that fishmen are like pumas – if you ever meet one in real life, you can just push it the hell over.

As you might have guessed, Lucy is only in this movie so that she can be saved from the monster and can kiss Fred as the words the end appear on the screen.  The only interesting thing about her is a brief moment of stunning misogyny.  She comes running to the doctor to tell him her father has had an accident and needs help – and before going to do so, the doctor makes Lucy take a sedative. Her behaviour was not in any way hysterical or unreasonable.  A little reassurance would have done the job just fine!

This scene suggests that the townspeople don't think very highly of Lucy, and there are other bits that tell us she's probably supposed to be at least ten years younger than twenty-nine-year-old actress Jeanne Carmen.  On the other hand, they seem to think she's capable enough to look after her injured father alone and with only a locked door to protect her from the marauding monster.  Then again, if they didn't, it couldn't carry her off to be menaced.  Yet again, a movie's leading lady is a plot device rather than a character.  This seems particularly true of fishman movies.  Think of the Creature from the Black Lagoon series.

As I mentioned upfront, I have seen a lot of fishman movies.  This is the fifteenth since this blog's inception!  I thought there were a lot of bigfoot movies around, but if you check the tags you'll see that fishmen outnumber him two to one!  This brings up an interesting question – namely, why?

Why fishmen? Sea Monsters have a long and fascinating history that includes not just the classic serpent and kraken but such things as savage merpeople, scaly pig-fish covered with eyes, and according to one sixteenth-century map, very large Yorkshire terriers.  Then along came the 1930s and the popularization of the Loch Ness Monster as plesiosaur, opening up the range to prehistoric sea beasties.  Why not one of those?

I'm guessing the answer is 'because they're expensive'.  Those would require puppets and stop motion and other special effects.  A guy in a costume is much cheaper to build and operate.

Okay, but even if you have to restrict yourself to human-shaped monsters, there are plenty of those, too!  There's the aforementioned merpeople, but also vampires, werewolves, zombies, mummies, and their ilk!  Dracula and Frankenstein are both in the public domain!  And make no mistake, people have made lots of movies about those... but they have also made a whole lot of movies about fishmen!  Why fishmen?

The answer, most likely, is that Creature from the Black Lagoon came out in 1954 and it was huge, being one of those movies that requires an entire separate Wikipedia article for its cultural impact!  The tidal wave of other fishman movies that followed it are like the glut of monster-on-a-spaceship movies that followed Alien, or the fad for teenage slasher movies in the 1980s, or those cheaply animated direct-to-DVD movies that cluster around every Disney and Dreamworks release.  A fishman movie had made money, and now everybody was lining up to milk the scaly, mucus-coated cash cow!

That was a terrible mix of metaphors right there.  Yuck.

There's also something uniquely horrifying about one of the genre's major tropes – the fishman's interest in human women.  This, too, began with Creature from the Black Lagoon but as we've seen it carried over into other films – Bog and Creatures from the Abyss are notable examples (and then there's The Shape of Water). In The Monster from Piedras Blancas this idea is present in that the monster kidnaps Lucy instead of just killing her like it did every other human it met, but it's not emphasized the way the monster's interest in Kay was in Black Lagoon. Fish are proverbially cold and slimy, and the idea of sexual contact with one is almost reminiscent of necrophilia unless you have some very specific interests (see previous parentheses).  The fishman's lack of genitals make it that much more disturbing.

So now that we've sorted that out, my final question about fishman movies is this: could a fishman beat bigfoot in a fight? They're both big, broad-chested creatures that movies like to outfit with claws, teeth, superhuman strength, and bad tempers.  I think it would depend on where the battle happened.  If they're in the water, then the fishman has a clear advantage – bigfoot can drown.  If they're on land, things are a little more even.  The fishman's slime would make him difficult to hang onto, but if his gills dry out he'll have a hard time breathing.  Bigfoot's fur gives the fishman something to yank, but his large feet make him hard to knock down.  It might depend on whether or not the fishman is venomous.

Why hasn't anybody made that movie?  Picture it – dozens of fishmen swimming upstream to spawn, and bigfoot dragging them out of the water to eat like bears with salmon!  I'd absolutely pay for exorbitantly expensive theatre popcorn if it meant I got to see that on screen!

@starklysteve  rhae asked for some winteriron recs (read: i volunteered to spam rhae w buckytony fics because i adore them), so in no particular order, and based on my memory alone, here are some of my favourite buckytony fics!!

(please remember to leave kudos and comments!!)

American Memorial: @/spqr

“Pick up the shield,” Tony said. Understandably, Bucky told him to go fuck himself

Losing You (Is My Supervillain Origin Story):  @amethystinawrites

There are a lot of things that Bucky regrets. The list is, quite frankly, longer than he can handle on most days and, right at the very top, is lying to Tony about who killed his parents. Bucky has known even from before they started dating, but he simply can't bring himself to say anything — to ruin one of the few good things he has in his life. It's selfish and wrong, but Bucky just doesn't know how to tell Tony that he is the one responsible for Howard and Maria Stark's deaths.

So when he starts receiving anonymous emails, threatening to expose the truth to Tony and the rest of the world, Bucky is desperate enough to agree to the blackmailer's terms, even if it means breaking up with Tony. Bucky cannot, under any circumstances, let Tony find out about his parents from anyone but Bucky himself.

Too late Bucky realizes that there is much more to the blackmailer's scheme than just having Bucky break Tony's heart. Too late Bucky realizes that despite his best intentions, he will still end up losing everything — in a much more permanent way than he could ever have imagined.

Hindsight: @amethystinawrites

Ever since he was a little boy, Bucky has dreamed of becoming an astronaut together with Steve, and he can hardly believe their luck when both of them are picked for the Ares 3 crew — the third expedition sent to explore Mars. It is, quite literally, a dream come true.

Things get complicated when Bucky finds himself inconveniently attracted to their mechanical engineer, however. Tony Stark is funny, competent, and absolutely captivating, but considering NASA's strict non-fraternization policy, Bucky knows it's better to keep his interest to himself — at least until they return to Earth. He can wait.

Not once does Bucky consider the possibility that all of them might not make it back alive, or just how much he'll come to regret not acting when he had the chance.

Arsenal: @tangodancer91 (part of a series) (also my all time favourite buckytony series ever)

Two years after the Civil War that tore apart everything she’d bled to build, Toni Stark sacrificed herself for her newly-reinstated teammates and ended up stranded in the past. Freed of her name, her fortune, and her hostile ex-teammates, she built herself a life as an agent for the OSS, the American secret service, and, having nothing to lose, accepted a mission to infiltrate the newest player in the war: an organization that call themselves HYDRA.

Then, she met a young draftee with a dreadfully familiar face, and they clicked like she had never clicked with anyone before. By the time she realized she’d fallen for the man who’d cost her everything, it was too late, but she’d always been an all or nothing type of girl, and if she was damning herself, well then…might as well go all the way.

Yield: @aurumacadicus (this is an a/b/o verse fic)

All Bucky has ever wanted was to win the contest for Tony's hand in marriage. It's a bit harder now that he's down to one arm, but luckily his friends are willing to help make up the difference.

Barnes Family Motors Inc: @phlintandsteel-ao3 (this is an a/b/o verse fic)

In a world where alphas legally own omegas, Bucky is just a small time mechanic from Brooklyn who gets lucky in a poker game. Tony is an omega whose life is fraught with abuse, until his luck suddenly takes a turn for the better.

In the grand scheme of things they may only be able to make little differences in the lives of those around them, but that doesn't mean it's not worth making them. After all, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

The Long Con (don’t kid yourself): @phlintandsteel-ao3

When Tony finds out that Howard is thinking about changing the terms of Tony’s trust fund, he embarks on a not-so-elaborate scheme to prove that he’s totally settling down and not in continued need of Howard’s “guidance” until 25 instead of 21. Step 1: Get a fiance Step 2: ??? Step 3: Profit (Finally be free of Howard)

Unfortunately, Tony Stark is the worst con-artist ever, and may only be kidding himself..

Hot Mess:  @/niki

“Would serve him right if we had the world's most ill-advised one night stand.”

Imperceptions and Assumptions: @/NarutoRox

Afterward, Bucky would look back on their first meeting with fondness and a healthy dose of amusement. At the time, though, he’d mostly been confused - and more than a little embarrassed.

Bucky hadn’t paid much attention to the media in his early days, and hadn’t bothered really reading up on the team or anything, either, so when Steve had said ‘Tony Stark’, Bucky had just assumed.

The same way he’d looked at the three people who’d walked through the door - an imposing redhead in heels, a bored-looking brunette who dimpled when she saw him and Steve, and a sturdy-looking man wearing a slight glower - locked eyes on the man, and assumed him to be the infamous Tony Stark Steve wouldn’t shut up about.

It was Bucky’s first lesson when it came to Natasha Antonia ‘Toni’ Stark - never assume.

~

In which Tony Stark is actually Natasha Antonia 'Toni' Stark (which everyone knows) as well as Iron Man (which everyone does not know), assumptions are made, and there are misunderstandings.

From this prompt: How about a cross between my two favorite tropes? Nobody knows who iron man is other than Natasha/Antonia Stark's bodyguard but Bucky is in love with one or both of them

i know, you know (that i’m not telling the truth) : @imposter-human

psychic tony stark is called to work a routine case with detective bucky barnes; only, he seems to be more connected to the case than anyone thought

or, a psych au!!

the new romeo and juliet: @imposter-human

Bucky and Tony weren’t dating, because a firefighter and a detective couldn’t date (never mind that Tony hadn’t slept with anyone else since their thing had started, and he and Bucky hung out with an alarming frequency, and the whole precinct thought that they were an item). It didn't matter how many nights they spent together, how Bucky had a drawer of Tony's things and vice versa, they just couldn't.

It was a classic Romeo and Juliet situation, if Romeo and Juliet actively disliked each other on top of everything.

if found, please return to: @capnshellhead

Tony Stark shows up at Bucky's bar after a really tough break up and Bucky decides to look after him

gods of carnage:  @deathsweetqueen (part of a series)

On May 29, 1970, the Winter Soldier feels a burning sensation and looks down at his wrist to find a single name written in enduring ink: Antonia Margaret Stark.

HYDRA, fearing the defiance of their greatest asset due to a bond that cannot and will not be denied its due, immediately dispatches the Soldier, to locate, collect and deliver this newborn girl to HYDRA, which will become her new home, her new family and her entire world - to be raised as another one of HYDRA’s great warriors: their Engineer.

But the Engineer is a faulty asset. She thinks things that may get her killed one day. She wants things that she shouldn’t, that are not hers to want. She has a mind and body that belong more to herself than any handler, than any commander she may have.

And if she cuts her strings, when she cuts her strings, well, when you put sheep next to wolves, you ask for a bloodbath.

where i walk, you follow (where i burn, you burn):  @deathsweetqueen

At his father's command, Anthony Stark trades in his northern keep for a southern crown, wedded and bedded by Alexander of House Pierce, First of His Name.

Tony does his duty, becomes a wolf in name only, toothless and clawless, and a dark, gleaming ornament for the King, even if he would make himself a widower a hundred times over.

Honour demanded it of him, and so he did.

But it is Ser James Barnes, named the Kingslayer for his sins during the Rebellion, that draws his eye, gives him comfort in this pit of liars and monsters

So, what is honour compared to a good man's love? They are only human, and the gods have fashioned us for love.

[Fic by deathsweetqueen, Art by MassiveSpaceWren]

Cat Parenting (And Other Meet Cutes):  @singingwithoutwords (this is an a/b/o verse fic)

Of all the ways Bucky could have finally gotten a chance to speak to his crush, why did it have to be his cat getting Tony's cat pregnant?

Codename Heartbreaker:  @rinnwrites (part of a series)

Today was a day that, contrary to popular belief, Tony Stark had most certainly not been looking forward to. It was election day, or election night, rather, and the polls were closed, the results were in; Howard Stark was the next President of the United States of America.

or

Tony Stark Bingo - R3: Election Day

Fate Strings Not Required: @akira-of-the-twilight

“Hey doll,” a new voice said from Tony’s side.

Tony glanced at the person approaching.

Someone was working the rugged, bad boy look. The new guy rocked a leather jacket and blue jeans.

His blue eyes lit up with joy as he approached Tony. “Something wrong here?” The new guy gave the first guy--the one insisting he was Tony's soul mate--a once over then turned his full attention on Tony. “You’re looking a little stressed, anything I can do?”

Tony took the hint.

Tony wrapped his hand around the new guy’s elbow. He kept his touch light and breakable in case he’d misread the cue.

“Just some guy claiming to be my soul mate, babe.”

The new guy’s eyebrows rose to his hairline in surprise. He chuckled and gave the first guy a smirk. “Strange. Last time I checked we were soul mates.”

Siren’s Treasure: @akira-of-the-twilight

Prompt: I really love the idea of playboy!Bucky flirt of the seven seas first-mate to Captain Rogers, falling completely overboard in love with our Blacksmith-Inventor Inexperienced!Tony who goes from confident captive to shy woe-begone man in the presence of Bucky's fierce affections. Virgin!Tony wonders what a siren like Bucky could possibly want with him. Bucky wants to know what the fuck Logan thinks he's doing flirting with the man who stole his heart like sunken treasures. Happy ending please?

“Sirens killed your crew?” Steve repeated.

The dark haired man nodded. Just an hour ago the Avenger crew had found the man clinging to driftwood in the middle of the ocean. Now he clutched the flask of rum Bucky had given him like it was all that kept him buoyant during these tumultuous times.

The man—Tony—had already downed more than half the flask and was still sober. “Not exactly my crew, but close enough. Yeah.” Tony uncapped the flask and threw back a mouthful.

Steve frowned. “What do you mean by that?”

Tony shrugged. “I wasn’t captain of the ship.”

“So what were you?” Steve pressed.

Road hazards: @riotwritesthings

Steve and Bucky's BFF road trip is not going well. For starters, Steve couldn't even make it, and for some bizarre reason asked Tony to take his place. The fact that it’s only a couple days before someone is trying to kill them isn’t nearly as stressful as the fact that Bucky and Tony have never really had an actual conversation.

It’s hard to avoid someone when stuck in a car with them though, and if they manage to stay alive they just might learn a thing or two.

Once Upon a Wintertime: @iam93percentstardust (this is an a/b/o verse fic)

Look, Bucky knows that he’s fulfilling every cliché in the book right now. He knows that, as a bodyguard, he’s not supposed to fall in love with his client. But Tony’s good and sweet and so, so lonely and how could Bucky not? He thinks he’s got a shot after Tony breaks up with his boyfriend but on a trip across the country, he finds out that Tony needs a bondmate or the board will steal SI—and Ty’s already said yes.

little bird: @thxngam

Bucky laughs, and it’s loud and unbidden, a way he hadn’t laughed for years before, tugging his giggling omega into his lap. Tony quiets and nestles into Bucky’s chest like he was made to belong there, and Bucky has noticed several times that Tony is much smaller than he is, but he never quite noticed how Tony always seemed to curl into him as a reason for his size.

Tony nestles like a little bird.

Teenage Dream:  @anthonyed

Tony Stark develops a crush on the school's bad boy who is too cool to hang out with anyone. At least, it's what Tony thinks. He never considered that James Barnes is probably as lonely as he is.

(in the process of editing)

The Best Laid Plans (of Mice and Men):  @arboreal-elm-ash-oak

His Dark Materials AU

It was Annalise who noticed their small visitor first.

“Tony,” the spider daemon said softly, skittering up the collar of his dress shirt, two of her eight legs resting delicately against his cheek, “Don’t startle them, but I believe we have a guest. Look, by the coffee table.”

A Kitten and a Soldier: @/ThatDamnKennedyKid

Bucky hadn't heard from Rumlow in years - since the whole Winter Soldier fiasco in Siberia. They've been discharged for nearly six years, but when he gets a message that only says "I need your help" , he grabs his jacket and keys.

The Prince’s Bride: @hddnone

After Tony loses the love of his life to pirates on the high sea, not much matters to him. He agrees to wed Prince Justin Hammer to gain access to vibranium and shut himself away in his workshop until the end of time, but a group of ruffians kidnap Tony to take him to Hydra.

Tony's rescue takes on an unlikely form - the Dread Pirate Rogers, who killed the love of his life five years ago.

A Princess Bride AU

A Kind of Destiny: @weethreequarter

A chance meeting at a wedding brings together an American war veteran and the Prince of Wales. Little do they know, the wheels have been set in motion for a relationship which will change not only their lives, but the monarchy itself. Bucky and Tony strike up a friendship at Steve and Peggy’s wedding, a friendship that soon develops into more. But it’s not so simple: Tony is the Prince of Wales, and heir to the throne of Great Britain and the United Kingdom. Any relationship is played out in the press and public eye, and then there's that pesky issue of succession to consider too. But Bucky is no coward, and when he finds something he wants, he’s prepared to fight for it. And fight he will, at Tony's side, for their very own fairy tale ending.

Who is John Barleycorn?

Gruesome Origins & Modern Retellings

I was planning on making a post about the different harvest traditions for the Autumn Equinox, but in the middle of doing research for that I came across a character so crazy and fascinating that I felt the need to devote a whole post to him.  So today let’s go down the rabbit hole together to explore the strange tale of John Barleycorn and what it might reveal about our Pagan history.  The Autumn Equinox, also known as Mabon, is the second of the three important harvest festivals.  Most Pagan harvest festivals embrace the idea of sacrifice, perhaps none more so than Mabon, which is the time when the last sheaf of wheat & barley would be harvested. This notion of Sacrifice is one of the key themes associated with the popular story of John Barleycorn. You may have heard one of the many musical variations of this story or perhaps you're more familiar with the Robert Berns version from 1782.  If you haven’t ever heard this English Folk Song, give it a listen The story of John Barleycorn actually has really old origins.  There is a Scottish poem with a very similar theme and wording included in the Bannatyne Manuscript of 1568, though it’s likely that John Barleycorn is even older.  This is because the Bannatyne Manuscript is a collection of pre-existing works, many coming from the ancient oral tradition.  And considering the many pagan themes in the story, it’s definitely possible that the origins lie in Pre-Christian times. Specifically there may even be a link between John Barleycorn and the mythical figure Beowa, which is a figure from Anglo-Saxon paganism whose name means "barley." Now, the prevailing theory is that the tale of John Barleycorn is a symbolic representation of the crop of barley being harvested each autumn. The song describes the process of preparing the land, sowing the seeds, waiting for the crop to grow, and eventually harvesting. Then the song describes making the products of beer and bread which were key staples of the diet of early agrarian people.  For the most part this all makes sense but those of you who have read the poem or listened to the song have probably noticed the really gruesome way that this harvest is worded.  For example: “They laid him out upon the floor, To work him further woe; And still, as signs of life appear’d, They toss’d him to and fro. They wasted o’er a scorching flame, The marrow of his bones; But a miller us’d him worse of all, For he crush’d him between two stones. And they hae taen his very heart’s blood, And drank it round and round; And still the more and more they drank, Their joy did more abound.” Sure, maybe that’s just meant to be a creative interpretation of how to turn barley into beer and perhaps the reason this story has survived so long is in part due to the violent imagery, which makes the story more interesting and memorable.  Though perhaps there’s a bit more to the story. I want to share a theory that I recently found that might have some merit. This theory proposes that the tale of John Barleycorn is more than just a metaphor for the barley harvest and that it in fact contains references to real human sacrifices that occurred in Ancient Britain. I know what you’re thinking - pagan human sacrifice is a big trope often used by others to slander paganism.   But hear me out for a second because there’s some really interesting passages in this poem that deserve further inspection. The poem begins with: “There were three men come out of the west, their fortunes for to try, And these three men made a solemn vow, John Barleycorn would die” It’s interesting that we start with 3 men coming out of the West.  We’re all familiar with the religious importance of the number three.  The Celtic triad & triple spiral are of course famous symbols in Celtic paganism.  I also think it’s interesting that these men are coming from the West because in Celtic myths coming from “The West” meant coming from the otherworld or realm of the Fae. Also, in the tale of John Barleycorn before the the cutting of the barley there is an interesting passage that states: “They let him stand till midsummer Till he looked both pale and wan, And little Sir John he growed a long beard And so became a man.” Of course the reference to midsummer is interesting from a pagan perspective but I’m even more interested in the “growing a long beard” part.  Firstly, I’m not sure how the beard part fits in if this poem is just a metaphor for the barley harvest.  Instead, I think it’s possible that it’s referencing the long beards of the druids.  The druids believed that our life-force was channeled through the extremities which is why Druid priests would grow their beards and hair long.  So perhaps our John Barleycorn is representing a sacrificial priest. Next in the story we have a death being depicted in the poem, but it’s a three-fold death.  The poem states: “They hired men with the scythes so sharp To cut him off at the knee, They rolled him and tied him by the waist, And served him most barbarously. They hired men with the sharp pitchforks Who pricked him to the heart.” The three-fold death is a really common theme in Celtic and Anglo-Saxon folklore.  Even Merlin in the Arthurian legends prophesied a three-fold death for himself which would occur by falling, stabbing, and then drowning. So already we’ve found references in the passages of John Barleycorn to: - The Celtic triad and the Faerie realm in the west - The spiritual tradition of beard growing among the Druids - The importance of the three-fold death in Celtic lore. So what’s really going on here? In the famous anthropological book called “The Golden Bough” by Sir James Frazer, he states that the Barley King was personified in ancient ritual practice by a real person.  This man was honored as a King during the yearly cycle and when it was harvest time he would be sacrificed and dismembered and his body was dragged through the fields to ensure a fertile harvest for next year. This reminds me of a particularly gruesome passage in the poem: “They've wheeled him around and around the field till they've come unto a barn And here they've kept their solemn word concerning Barleycorn They've hired men with the crab tree sticks to split his skin from bone.” If this is just a metaphor for harvesting the barley, then what is the purpose of wheeling him “around and around” the field.  Perhaps Sir James Frazer might be right and that this passage could be a reference to the sacrificed individual being dragged through the fields to ensure the fertile harvest. It’s definitely a pretty disturbing visual and I probably should point out that we don’t really have much historical evidence concerning Pagan religious sacrifice.  One of the most popular accounts of pagan human sacrifice comes from Julius Caesar during his conquest of Gaul where he reports to have seen the burning alive of victims in a large wooden effigy, which is now known as a wicker man.  Though considering the Celts were his enemy at the time it is possible he exaggerated some details.   So, while it’s likely that some human sacrifice occurred among the Celts and Anglo-Saxons we don’t really know too many details and it’s likely that the violence was probably a bit exaggerated. So when it comes to our story of John Barleycorn we have our two main theories: The first theory is that the story of John Barleycorn is just a metaphor of the barley harvest and that any violent wording was just added for extra flair and it doesn’t represent any wider themes. The second theory is that the story of John Barleycorn actually contains references to the practice of religious human sacrifice among the Celtic and the Anglo-Saxon pagans. So which theory is correct?  In my opinion I think it might be both.  I think the main purpose of the story is to be a metaphor for the autumn barley harvest.  Though because this story is in fact really old, I think it picked up some Pagan references, stereotypes, and motifs along the way.   But, I’d love to hear what you think the story of John Barleycorn represents.  So share your thoughts down below in the comments. 

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💖

Self rec? I have to pick amongst my children fics? this is like terrible. so terrible @radio-chatter

But if I have to pick…. In no particular order a cross section, if you will, of my various writing tendencies:

1) An Andromeda Tale: The Making of a Pathfinder and a King. Mass Effect Andromeda, the slowest of slow burns MReyder endgame fic.  This is my magnum opus MReyder fic that I swear to Anubis I will finish it eventually.  It’s at >600k and still going.  This was I think the first thing I published on AO3 (or close to it).

Summary: Scott Ryder never saw his life going this way, not that anyone ever asked him his opinion. Now he's pathfinder with too many people depending on his young shoulders and trying to figure out what he actually wants for himself. Reyes Vidal, man of mystery, former pilot and now sometimes smuggler. Who knows where he came from or his motivations but he's come to Andromeda to change his destiny. What neither Scott nor Reyes could have predicted is what their lives would be once they came to Andromeda.

2.  The Dream of the Symbiote’s Host.  Venom.  Symbrock. Complete at 4,511 words. What can I say?  I never thought I’d write tentacle porn but I suppose this is why you should never say never.  It’s a one shot and well…. Yeah it was fun to write.  Might someday dip my toes back in the Symbrock pairing.  I’m also totally blaming this one on you @radio-chatter.

Summary: Eddie’s been holding out on Venom. An accidental side trip into an interior decorations shop reveals something he hadn’t intended for Venom to ever learn about him and it’s all that art print’s fault.

3. Family, Familia, ’Ohana. 911, H50 and SWAT crossover. Eventual Buddie, McDanno and implied Hondo/Deacon platonic (or not). Navyseal!EvanBuckley. Wip at 81,451 words. This is my other, more popular, long work. I just love the pairings involved and my imagination was fed too much Jack Johnson music and this happened. Also my most popular fic on AO3 by a good margin.

Summary: When one family seems lost another comes back from the past. But does Buck want to return to the past or live in the present? And does his present lead to a future he wants? Only he can answer these questions but Steve at least will be there to support him.

4. The Outlaw and the Cartel Boss. Mayans MC. Miguel Galindo/Ezekiel ”EZ” Reyes, Coco Cruz/Angel Reyes. WIP at 98,569 words. Sentinel/Guide AU that ignores almost everything canon. Everyone has that extreme rarepair, can’t exist in canon idea that is possibly overindulgent. This is my version of that. I haven’t even seen much of the show but I really love the work of several of the actors in this show so I smashed my minimal knowledge in with my favorite fanfiction trope and this is what you get. It’s still a wip. I know I haven’t posted in a while but I am still—very slowly—working on it. I think this is the most developed sentinel/guide story I’ve written so far but it’s a trope that I’ve revisited several times now (see my versions of Buddie and Mreyder for this trope too).

Summary: EZ Reyes came online with his mother’s violent death and suffered the consequences of his actions in the aftermath. When Jimenez offers him a deal to turn evidence in on the Galindo cartel, he agreed as he’d brought shame on his tribe by his actions and it was a chance at redemption that he didn’t feel he deserved. He just didn’t anticipate who his guide would be and the amount of trouble they’d generate for him. Miguel had goals—to legitimize the family business, enjoy life and his family. He didn’t anticipate any of the events that forced him online as a guide but now that he has a sentinel he’s not letting him go.

5. A Soul’s Weight. Mass Effect Andromeda. Implied eventual MReyder. Complete. 1,376 words. Does not require any knowledge of Mass Effect. I debated a long time which other fic to recommend to people but this is a short one-off I wrote in literally about an hour that I still find myself coming back to again and again and debating writing more in this particular alternative universe. It’s quite different from most of my other writing but I think that’s also what makes it so interesting. Ancient egyptian diety? Implied multiverse? Taking fanon to the limits? Guilty. Short but sweet but would be the intro to MReyder of mine that I would recommend. Or I suppose you could read Seguir (another AU).

Summary: The futures he had seen taunted him, drew him, seduced him. The possibilities that Scott Ryder presented were... intriguing.  The cry of the ibis called across the sands, chased by the howls of the golden wolves of Anubis that hunted this night.