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#iron dad
irondadmadlads · 2 days ago
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Irondad Prompt #134:
Tony: Peter called me the d-word!
Peter: I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to!
Pepper: Did he call you a dumbass? Because you are-
May: You can be a dick too sometimes, so-
Tony: No, he called me dad!
Pepper and May: Awwwwwww!
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marvel-lous-guy · 4 months ago
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Muffled voice on the phone: We have kidnapped your son and if you want to see him alive again you'll have to-
Tony: Son? I HAVE A SON!?! WHY AM I JUST HEARING ABOUT THIS!?!
Muffled voice: ...We have the teenager with brown hair and a science pun shirt
Tony: Oh, you mean Peter. Yeah, he's not my son.
Muffled voice: ...are you sure?
Tony: yeah, I'm pretty sure
Muffled voice: Well, we still have the kid locked up... so do you want him or not?
Tony: ... Peter is literally sat right in front of me doing his calculus homework...
Tony: Pete, were you kidnapped?
Peter: Oh yeah! That's what I forgot to tell you!
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bruciemilf · 5 months ago
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I'll be taking no criticism at this time
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midnightsinamiens · a month ago
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rhodey, after finding out about peter: are you sure you can look after him? you can barely look after yourself. i mean have you seen how much coffee you drink?
tony, not listening to a single word because peter just sent him a photo of him with a cat he saved on patrol: oh my god i must protect this sweet child with my life. friday remove me as your top priority, the kid comes first, no one hurts him, happy's his bodyguard now, the suit is his, he comes first
rhodey: i take it back, the kid'll be fine
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hail-hawk-eye · 4 months ago
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Hes an acquired exotic pet
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azerishi · 5 months ago
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Steve: Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
Peter, nodding sagely: So, that way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.
Tony, tearing up: That's my boy.
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ironcanandhisbugboy · 7 months ago
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Peter: Hey did one of you guys forget your thing?
Thor: What is this “thing” you speak about?
Peter, holding Thor’s hammer: This
Thor: What the-
Tony: MY KID IS WORTHY! FUCK ALL OF YOU
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forgetful-nerd · 7 months ago
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Tony: what is going on here?
Morgan: *dressed in a red frilly gown* we’re playing princesses! Peter is taking his carriage very slowly by his rivals home, so that he can see his latest hat.
Peter: *driving a toy car, wearing a sequined blue dress with a matching blue hat* Eat you’re heart out Harley, you toad-eating hag.
Harley: *sipping tea from a plastic tea cup, dressed in an abysmal yellow gown* Peter, you must surely be aware that I am unable to view the roads from my castle due to the vastness of my estate.
Peter: oh, please do forgive my mistake, Harley, I had only assumed you could see from that ostentatiously high pedestal atop of which you have placed yourself.
Morgan: Ohhhhh! The girls are fighting!!!!!
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idk-bruh-20 · a month ago
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Tony gets attached to people fast actually
when people are like "It's so unrealistic to say Tony and Peter had a close relationship or that Tony would ever give anything to Peter! they spent hardly any time together!" I'm just like. ?
My man met quiet, nerdy Bruce Banner and asked him to move in within the hour. He is a u-haul lesbian but for Potential Science Friends. You think my trauma survivor idiot bitch boy would look at Peter -- who like Bruce is smart enough to keep up with him, and unlike all the old avengers actually looks at him like he's a hero -- and not think, "please let me convince you to care about me"? lmao okay.
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lesbian-deadpool · 6 months ago
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(On a date)
MJ: I’ll have the salad, no nuts, please.
Waiter: Of course.
Peter: It didn’t say it had nuts.
MJ: I’m allergic, so I tell them to be safe.
Peter: That makes sense.
Waiter: And for you?
Peter: Steak, no bees, please.
(Bonus)
Y/N to Natasha, watching from another table: ... how did he get a date in the first place?
Natasha: You act like you're any better
(Bonus bonus)
Steve to Tony, at a different table: I thought you said you prepped him?
Tony: I. Did.
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intoafandom · 6 months ago
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Oh my fvcking gosh. I was rewatching nwh and I discovered something that is absolutely destroying my fvcking heart.
So when the government ppl are going through Peter’s apartment at the beginning of the movie, the first thing they take a picture of is this.
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A photo of ned and mj. Two ppl Peter cares a lot about. But notice the frame of the photo. Black with a silver outline. And you know where else we’ve seen this frame?
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HERE! And I just realized that Peter freaking MADE these. And he GAVE that photo to Tony as a gift. This makes that moment in endgame even more meaningful. Its not just the picture that motivates Tony, its also the fact that Peter made it FOR him and gave it to him to keep.
Its 3:20 in the morning and my freaking heart is pounding and i am SOBBING DUDE😭😭
UPDATE AS OF MAY 18, 2022: i just thought of this and...
What if Peter just had it on his shelf the whole time like the photo of ned and mj. And what if Tony went to the parker’s apartment after they both got dusted and what if Tony grabbed it himself since Peter wasn’t there anymore 😖
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irondadmadlads · 17 hours ago
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Irondad Prompt #137:
Tony: *sneaking a giant bunny behind his back*
Pepper: Oh, not this again!
Tony: It’s for Peter!!!
*Later*
Peter: I LOVE IT MR. STARK!!!!
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marvel-lous-guy · 4 months ago
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Peter: If there was a zombie apocalypse... couldn't you bite the zombie and it would turn back into a human?
Tony: ...what?
Peter: well,  if a zombie bites you, you turn into a zombie... so would a zombie turn into a human if a human bit it?
Tony: No, I didn't mean "what" as in elaborate. I meant it as in "how the fuck does your brain come up with this shit"
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marvelnatasha · a month ago
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Tony: In light of what you did for me, you can hug me for four to five seconds.
Peter: FORTY FIVE SECONDS?!?
Tony: No! Four to five seconds!
Peter: Too late!!!
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littlepurplefangirl · 2 months ago
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The supreme family be like:
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hail-hawk-eye · 7 months ago
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Some irondad and spiderbaby content to soothe the soul
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