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woogyu · 3 years

Note

Can I please have 4,5 and 8 with hyunjae 🥺

4. You're staring again

5. Wow. You look stunning

8. Don't smile at me like that. You know it drives me crazy

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notes; MIGHT HAVE NEARLY SOBBED WRITING THIS, THIS IS SO CUTE, AM DYING, HOPE YOU LIKE. Tbz and royalty aus are just a perfect match in my brain.

Thank you for requesting!!

wc; 1633

Drabble Game Requests | OPEN | Drabble Prompts; fluff | angst | funny

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“You’re staring again,” Younghoon elbowed Hyunjae in the side, nearly causing the prince to drop his drink. Hyunjae shot a glance at his oldest friend, eyes wide as he was caught watching the far door.

“Was not,” Hyunjae mumbled, his cheeks tinged a light pink as he quickly averted his gaze anywhere else.

“She’ll be here.” Younghoon told him, voice softening as he realized what the prince was doing. Hyunjae didn’t respond, his attention now very focused on the glass in his hand. He had already brushed off half of the ladies at the ball, wanting to save his first dance for the special one he was waiting for.

“We are late because you spent so long with those hair curlers,” you hissed at your friend, hurrying up the palace stairs. “Beauty comes at the cost of time, my dear y/n,” the girl responded, batting her eyelashes at you. A smile threatened to pull at your lips as you rolled your eyes.

You were honestly foolish for even coming here, for assuming that the prince would be expecting you. He had his pick of all the unwed ladies attending, there was no way he would want to waste his time with you. It was really a miracle you had even spoken with him at all, a chance of fate some might say.

»»————-　♡　————-««

You were here far too late, but the head baker had left you with a seemingly endless number of tasks to complete before you could leave. Granted, the tasks had been left to your entire team of bakers, however, as the youngest of the bunch they had graciously left them for you as an ‘initiation’. You supposed that taking advantage of the new staff was nothing new.

You worked on rolling out the dough for rolls, your arms screaming in pain after being worked for nearly 16 hours straight. Part of you wanted to leave, quit this job and go back to your town. Forget about your dreams of becoming head baker at the palace and admit to your family that they were right. Blinking back tears, you shook your head, no, you could do this. You wouldn’t let them force you out.

“Gods! You scared me half to death,” a voice cut through the silence, your eyes darting to a figure in the doorway. It was nearly 3am, no one should be awake right now.

“Don’t the baker's shift end at 6? You are either here very late or very early.” The voice commented, walking toward you. As they entered the light you realized, to your horror, that it was the prince. You were very aware of the fact that you were covered in flour and probably had horrendous dark circles under your eyes. You quickly wiped off your hands and bowed, your shoulders tensing up.

“Your Majesty” you greeted, voice wobbly and uncertain. He waved a hand, leaning against the counter you were working on.

“No need for the formalities…” he smiled at you and you could have sworn your heart jumped at the sight. “I don’t believe I’ve met you before… and I am a frequent visitor of the kitchens” he hummed, reaching under the counter to retrieve a glass before filling it with water.

“I just started working here… my name is y/n, your ma-“ a quick glance from him cut off your honorific. You shut your mouth and relaxed a little bit. You had always heard wonderful stories regarding the prince, both in reference to his kindness and beauty.

“You can call me Hyunjae” he said smoothly, chuckling when you quickly shook your head, mouth open in shock. You could never.

“So Miss y/n, what keeps you here so late or early?” he inquired, his eyes fixed on yours, nearly causing you to choke when you began to answer him. Why did your name have to sound so pretty on his lips?

“I stayed late to finish the work assigned to my t-“ you quickly cut off your words, you couldn’t rat out your team to the prince, that wouldn’t look good on you. “Assigned to me today” you quickly finished, hoping he did catch your slip up.

“Hmmm, a bakers’ assignment shouldn’t take into the night to finish” he mused lazily, moving around to stand next to you. He was quiet for a moment, sipping his water, either waiting for you to explain further or giving you time to think of a better answer. When you didn’t say anything he simply smiled and set his cup down, you were thankful he didn’t press the topic further.

“Would you like some help? I haven’t been able to fall asleep so perhaps a little bit of work might be good” he explained, causing your eyes to widen. You quickly shook your head, struggling to find out how to respond to such an offer. What sort of prince offered to help those working in his castle?

“I simply couldn’t… It wouldn’t be fit… You…” you struggled to supply, mind reeling with how close in proximity he was to you. This prince was going to be the death of you if he kept this up, your heart couldn’t handle it.

Hyunjae merely smiled at your weak protests, rolling up his sleeves and dousing his hands with flour. “An extra set of hands will make the work go faster” he offered, pulling off a piece of dough you had been kneading and began working it on the table.

»»————-　♡　————-««

You had been in shock that night, and the weeks after only showed you that the prince would not run out of ways to shock you further. Your nightly rendezvous in the kitchen became nearly a daily thing, him helping you with your tasks and the two of you chatting about everything and nothing.

You hadn’t planned on attending the ball, unsure if you would even be allowed to do so. Then Hyunjae asked, and you were learning that it was impossible for you to say no to him. He looked at you as if you weren’t a baker and him a prince, but as if you were just another lady and him just another gentleman.

That being said, you knew how foolish it was to come here tonight. Stolen moments in a dark kitchen were one thing, but a ball where there were dozens of other ladies in beautiful ball gowns… you wouldn’t stand a chance in your simple white lace dress. And yet, you found yourself utterly excited about the event, about the possibility and of course, about the prince.

“Thank you… for attending with me” you told your friend before the two of you stepped through the doors. “I don’t think I would have been able to do this alone” you admitted, sheepishly looking down at the floor.

“Don’t let the other ladies intimidate you y/n, you look absolutely stunning” your friend said with absolute certainty before pushing the large doors open.

You stepped through, the bright lights filling your vision before the ball came into view. Many eyes snapped up to yours before retreating, but as you slowly descended the stairs you found a pair of eyes focused entirely on you. Your cheeks flushed as you focused on not tumbling down the staircase, the prince maneuvering through the crowd to meet you at the bottom of the stairs.

Upon reaching the bottom you took Hyunjae’s outstretched hand, your eyes focused on him as the rest of the guests faded into the background.

“Wow.” He swallowed, his eyes momentarily flashing down to your feet and back to your eyes. “You look stunning” he breathed as your heart raced. You smiled softly, nervously glancing down at your gown.

“It was my mothers,” you said softly, unsure if why you had even said that as if he would care. He simply smiled at your words, leading you out onto the dance floor.

“She must be proud to have such a beautiful daughter” he commented, his eyes sparkling in the brightly lit room. You flushed once more, allowing him to lead you onto the ballroom floor.

“May I have this dance?” he asked, his eyes trained on you as he held out his hand. You nodded a little too quickly, not trusting your voice to provide him with a verbal answer. When he pulled you in close, you could have sworn that time itself paused around you. You were entirely unaware of what was going on outside of you and the prince.

“I saved my first dance for you… I am so very happy that you decided to come” he admitted, his lips close to your ear. Your breath hitched and you nearly tripped over your own feet. Not only had he been waiting for you, he hadn’t danced with anyone else… If your heart hadn’t been racing before it certainly was now.

When you didn’t answer he leaned back a little bit as he looked down at you wearing the most dazzling smile you had ever seen.

“Don’t smile at me like that. You know it drives me crazy” you breathed before you could even register what you were saying. You flushed and his smile only grew… gods you could have sworn there were stars in his eyes.

“Like what?” he promoted, amusement swimming in his gaze. You look a steadying breath and brought your eyes back up to his, getting lost in the depth of them.

“Like I’m the only girl in the room” you answered, voice barely above a whisper. He let out a breathy laugh, his arms tightening around your waist.

“In my eyes, you are” he stated, the sincerity in his voice washing over you.

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un2-verse · 3 years

Text

BILLY — Kim Taehyung (3)

Synopsis: News of a Sadistic Serial Killer nicknamed “Jigsaw” is spreading around town like wildfire… the nickname stemming from the puzzle piece he cuts from every victim’s body. No one knows who he’ll trap next but in a town full of delinquents and criminals, it could never be you. Right?

Pairing: yandere!Taehyung x f!reader

genre: angst, horror, weirdly some fluff lol

Warnings: dark themes, yandere, stalking, manipulation, conditioning, mentions of abuse, suicidal ideations/attempts, self harm, murder, depictions of torture etc (basically its gorey and fucked up), angel trap, etc stabbing and guns. do not read if triggered!!!!

wordcount: 2.2k

taglist: @yes-sol-not-soul @yoongiofmine

a/n: pt 3 is here!! honestly i wasnt expecting this amount of support as i’ve never published my writing before so thank u sm ♡ i was inspired to write this one night and i had no idea where it’d go or anything but i’m happy with the way its turning out :D fun fact abt me, i’ve been obsessed w the franchise since i was little and i actually have 2 saw tattoos, one of billy and one above saying “cherish your life” since that’s pretty much the motto of saw :) and i have quite the collection of saw/billy items so why not turn my fav horror film into a fucked up love story! let me know if u would like to be added to the taglist and pls enjoy reading^^ feel free to send me asks abt the series or anything u want~ i love hearing from u guys!! :D ps— taehyung and the reader dont have much interaction in this part,, theyll definitely be more of them together in part 4 :) unedited so pls excuse any mistakes!! tysm <33 and remember these are fictional characters and do not represent bts personally in any way!!

series masterlist

part one part two

The headlines constantly named the Jigsaw Killer, Billy. The somewhat eerie little doll that had a face as white as a Calla Lily with spirals on it’s cheeks as red as the blood that was shed during the tests. Billy was always dressed in a little black suit with a red bowtie and he was (most of the time) situated on a squeaky battered tricycle. Attached was always a tape that read “play me” and when the subjects did, a chilling voice— one that could make even the world's worst predators shiver with terror— would echo around the room.

Everyone knew that a doll clearly wasn’t responsible, yet they gave it the name Billy in hopes to somewhat humanise the face that instilled panic— they did not want to live in fear.

It was the only face behind the killings.

But this time, there was a different subject stuck in the test and Billy had made sure there was no way for them to survive.

“How are you scared of heights? You’re practically a giant yourself!”

“Just because I’m tall doesn’t mean I can’t be scared of heights Y/Nie.”

You had no idea how long had passed since Taehyung had turned up at the garage, you were too busy chatting away squeezed into the kitchen while your Dad, Yoongi and Hobi worked on the cars in the shop. If anyone could hear you both, they would think you’d known eachother since childhood— the playful jokes and light touches exaggerated that.

You’d only known him for a few hours really, if you added the time spent with him on the first day and now. It hadn’t seemed like all those weeks ago that you first met, he had a familiar presence, as though you had known him for years compared to the hours.

“I just wouldn’t imagine you to be scared of anything Taehyung… you seem so confident and fearless.”

You saw the way Taehyung looked at you. His eyes flashed with understanding.

“I did have my fears back then, much like yours.”

“What do you mean?” you had a rough idea on what he meant but you needed him to voice it.

A deep inhale and the words flowed from his lips before he could stop it, “The fear of living. I had been through some stuff you know, growing up. My mum was working a lot and my dad was an alcoholic, he was so fucking possessive and wouldn’t let her go anywhere without kicking off. It was a fucking shitshow and so toxic. This one time though, I’d pretended that I’d gone to school and waited outside the front door. It didn’t take long before I heard shit getting smashed and my dad shouting.” Taehyung was telling the truth only, he left out the part where he was also as possessive, if not more, than his father. Well, let's say… obsessive. “I just ran in the house and saw my dad towering over my mum and I don’t remember what happened but, I do remember my mum crying and my dad disappeared.”

Now Taehyung was lying through his teeth. He remembered clearly, almost like it was yesterday. He smashed the nearest bottle, pulled his mother away from the monster that scared her and stabbed him. Not just once, not twice but thirty-seven times. Hence the thirty seven tattoo on the palm of his right hand (the one he’d actually killed his father with). There was only Taehyung who knew what it meant, he counted every single time the broken glass pierced his father’s body, he counted with a smile on his face and a chuckle in his throat.

You were at a loss for words. Your mouth gaped in shock, eyes wide and your brain scrambled for the right thing to say. You reached over and grabbed his hand, interlacing your fingers. His thumb running back and forth along your hand. “I’m sorry, I can’t imagine what that must’ve been like.” There was no way you could relate, your mother and father were happy and in love. They had the ideal relationship, one you wished for yourself. You could empathise though.

“You don’t need to be sorry baby, it’s in the past and I’ve moved on from it. I was like you though, poisoned by the roots that keep you on the ground even though you wanted nothing more than to break free and be no longer.” A silence fell over you both before Taehyung uttered, “I wasn’t successful with my attempt so now I’m here to help you.”

Warmth spread throughout your body, a smile graced your features as you no longer felt alone.

You had a completely different idea to what those words actually meant.

It was nearing the evening when Taehyung’s car had been fixed. Yoongi popped his head in the kitchen to tell him but stopped himself so as to not interrupt the scene before him. You were laughing along to whatever Taehyung was babbling about with your hand resting on his bicep, with that look in your eyes that he hadn’t seen for years. Yoongi felt himself smile as he saw you hanging onto Taehyung's every word.

For the first time in forever, you looked alive.

Yoongi cleared his throat which drew yours and Taehyung’s attention, “Sorry to interrupt guys. We’ve finished with your car so whenever you’re ready we’ll be outside.” The infamous gummy smile overtook his features, you felt yourself beam in return.

“Thanks man! I’ll be like, five minutes.”

Yoongi nodded his head in reply and swiftly left the room.

You’d taken Tae’s hand into yours, playing with the array of rings that occupied his fingers. Solemn thoughts overtook, am I not gonna see him again? Was this, whatever this is, over before it had even begun? Your eyes stayed on his hand as you turned it over and traced your finger over the inked ‘thirty seven’ on his palm. “What does this mean?”

Taehyung didn’t think twice before he practically beamed out, “It’s my lucky number.”

The difference was, it wasn’t really his lucky number… although he did see it that way. It was the number that had stayed with him. It was something he was proud of, whenever he looked at the hand that killed his father, his chest filled with pride and a joyous feeling overtook his senses. It was his first murder. Something he relished in and thus, created the onslaught of Jigsaw killings. He targeted a certain type— those whose sins would lock them up forever if they were ever found out. Racists, murderers, rapists, drug dealers, con-men. Authoritative figures who abused their power. He even went as far as subjecting suicidal people.

You see, things aren’t sequential. Good doesn’t lead to good, nor bad to bad. People who steal, don’t get caught, they live the good life. Others lie, cheat and get elected.

Some people would call it karma but Taehyung, he called it justice.

He’d started this with one thing on his mind— those that don’t appreciate life do not deserve it.

Whenever a serial killer was on the loose, the press did what they always did. They gave them a nickname. While the public had named the doll Billy. The actual killer was named ‘Jigsaw’.

This stemmed from the jigsaw piece that was cut from the victims skin, no one knew why he was doing it or what it even stood for.

It did have a meaning although unknown to the public.

The jigsaw piece that was cut from the subjects was only ever meant to be a symbol that that subject was missing something. A vital piece of the human puzzle. The survival instinct.

After all, until a person is faced with death, it’s impossible to tell whether they have what it takes to survive.

Across town an underground abandoned warehouse, was where the next subject had found themselves.

They were suspended in the air, their feet merely dangling above the ground. The putrid smell of death lingered in every crevice, the sound of rats scurrying along the concrete floor filled their ears just as they began to stir awake.

A pain in their ribs was the overwhelming factor to them finally coming around. When they groggily opened their eyes, they were paralised with fear due to the scene in front of them.

A doll sat a few feet ahead, perched upon a tricycle. Adorned with a black suit and a red bowtie. A slow red light flashed in his eyes.

Billy.

Before the subject could even register how, when or why they found themselves trapped in a test, footsteps echoed behind them. The subject called out, “Help! Please, somebody help! I shouldn’t be here!”

A tsk reached their ears, as a disembodied voice replied, “Trust me, no one can hear you. Scream all you like. You’d just be wasting your breath, you may as well cherish it before it's gone.”

With hairs stood on end, the subject stilled. “What do you want from me?”

“I don’t want anything from you.” The man's footsteps grew louder. “I’m here to serve justice, that’s all.”

The man rounded the subject, settling in their view with only his cloaked back visible while he tended to the little doll. He touched Billy delicately—like he was a little child that he loved dearly. He combed his gloved hand through the doll's black hair and eventually pulled his fingers from the tresses to pat his head gently.

“You fucking psycho! Let me go!”

He couldn’t help but laugh at that which only infuriated the subject more causing them to shake in anger, a movement they soon ceased when they realised something was penetrating their ribs.

“I’d be very careful if I was you, we wouldn’t want you hurting yourself now… would we?” The cloaked figure spun around. An angry glint to his eye.

“What the fuck, you’re fucking crazy. Let me out, this isn’t right!” The subject tried their hardest to swing their legs, to somehow kick the man who’d imprisoned them.

“I think you’ll find it is right. You’re unworthy of the body you possess.” He inched closer, “see, when someone purposely intends to harm others, they lose their right to life.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

The man arched a brow as he replied, “Don’t play dumb. You know exactly what I’m talking about.” He felt like it was a game of cat and mouse except, he was a tiger and his subject, was the tiniest prey to mankind. “But, let me remind you! Since you can’t get your thick fucking head to work. You’re a liar, a cheater and an abuser. That ring any bells?”

The subject's face dropped.

“Ah, I see by your expression you know exactly what I’m talking about! Glad to see we’re on the same page.” He shrugged his cloak off placing it to the side of the doll. “I want to play a game.”

“What game? This isn’t a fucking game! You’re sick in the head you fucking cunt!”

The atmosphere shifted, the man remained calm while the subject went ballistic.

“What is this? What fucking game?”

“You feel the machine that’s currently occupying your ribs? Well, in about ten minutes that’s going to rip you apart. I’m proud to say that trap is my baby. I’ve been working on it especially for you! How nice is that?” he reached out to tug at the subject’s legs, tormenting them like a cat would a mouse. “Anyway, as my beautiful angel trap will rip you apart, my darling little friend Billy over here,” the subject followed the direction the man's hand pointed, “is going to match your face with the ugliness of your soul.”

“Fuck, fuck this! How do I stop it? Tell me how I fucking stop it!”

A boxy grin overtook the man's face, laughter poured from his mouth as he leaned over and slapped the subject’s leg. “This is a special game.”

“Who are you? What do you mean by ‘special game’?”

He raised himself so he stood tall and grabbed a knife from his pocket, “I’m the man you call Jigsaw.” He traced the tip of the knife along the subject’s ankle, “and when I say a special game… I mean you can’t get out.” While the subject was screaming in realisation, Taehyung walked back for his cloak, hung it over his shoulder and stalked off back the way he came. He sent one last smile to the subject as he rounded them and within the blink of an eye, he gripped the knife and slashed the subject’s achilles.

A chilling scream pierced the eerie atmosphere, the subject couldn’t string words together. Abundances of anxiety, terror and pure panic took reign of their body. Taehyung grabbed the injured muscles and forced his gloved fingers in as he gripped and twisted them, “That’s for Y/N.”

Taehyung had pressed the timer before he cut the subject’s tendons. He grabbed the tape from his pocket and threw it on the ground and with a chuckle he shouted, “Game over!”

Before he reached the end of the hallway, he heard the gunshots pierce his subjects face followed by the sound of the angel trap, even this far away Taehyung heard every crack of the ribs and the noise of the body being tore apart.

Without looking back, Taehyung rounded the corner and slammed the door shut.

He’d chosen the Angel trap for the irony, the subject that was currently hanging from the ceiling was no angel. They were a fucked up, evil, waste of space. Taehyung had done the world a favour, he’d done you a favour.

That got him thinking, how much blood would you shed in order to stay alive?

[a/n: who do we think was in the trap???👀]

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comehomeducklings · 3 years

Text

Present [Part 1] (Obsession)

A/N: Please don't copy, redistribute, and/or post my work on this site or any others. This has taken my time and creativity to come up with the story's characters and plot.

Also, I swear my writing gets better. It's a little rough right now but I'm planning on rewriting them.

Tom Riddle's Moodboard

Main Character's Moodboard

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1943 ~ 6th year

No sound above whispers could be heard throughout the great hall. The food on the table hasn't been touched by a single hand. The very thought of eating churning all our stomachs. Not during these times. Our heads turn every now and then, afraid of what might sneak up behind us. The death of Myrtle and others has shaken the entire school. A murderer is among us, trust is such a foreign concept now.

Dark purple eye-bags lay beneath every single student's eyes. No one is allowed to go home for the holidays. They aren't allowing us to leave, we are stuck in this cloud of darkness and uncertainty. No owls are supposed to be sent out. As the head girl, I'm responsible for every student's life and responsibilities. I have to know where everyone is at all times. It gets tiring at times, but necessary nonetheless.

A nightly routine consisted of all my dormmates huddling around each other. No sleep would come to us all night. We wouldn't move from the same spot until light shown from the windows. Our beds are all pressed together in the farthest corner of the room from the door. Our wands never leaving our hands in case of danger. Every little sound made from the outside provoking us. Even to the point of going mad. Potions used to stay awake, slowly wearing off as the morning arose. No sleep, we can't afford that luxury anymore.

I would leave the dorm to wait at the portrait for our assigned house professor to come. They would tell me it was safe for everyone to head to the great hall to get breakfast. As soon as they were done I quickly went to everyone's dormitory to wake them up, if they even slept at all. I would then inform them that it was safe to step out of their dorms. After everyone got situated I would have the students form a line and lead them towards the great hall. 1st-3rd years would occasionally hold the folds of my robes. Fearing that when they blink I would be gone. Leaving them alone to deal with the dangers that lurk in the school.

Not once have I lied about how they are going to be all right. That would be cruel. These students don't seek pathetic nurturing words, they want a protective force watching over them. So many clubs and activities have been canceled. Hogsmede and quidditch proving as a prime example. No one complained though, quidditch players too afraid to even step out of the castle's walls even if they were allowed.

Back to the present, I hold my good friend's hand as she slightly shakes from anxiety. I can see it in her eyes, the doubt of making it alive eating away at her brain. The spark once present in her shiny green eyes being blown out. Amelia, her name being. She's been biting her nails again, to the point where it had bled. This can be backed by the dried-up blood that is present at the tip of her finger's nail.

A booming voice can be heard, "You are now being dismissed to head to class, your houses head girl and boy will be assigning the group you'll be heading off with."

First period has been removed from every perfect and head's schedule. During this time we search the whole castle for any wanders. We make sure everyone is where they are supposed to be. If someone got lost or went to the wrong class we escort them to where they need to be.

After every class, students have a limited amount of time to get to their next lesson. Although, perfects and heads get more time to make sure everyone is where they are needed quickly. Then we hurry to our class after scanning the halls swiftly.

The once safest school of the wizarding world giving birth to the dark ages. More bodies have been found littering the schools. Most of them not found until their ghosts appear before us. Every single one not knowing how they died. Like the murderer is invisible upon meeting the victim. I originally suggested it could have been done by poison. When the bodies were checked, no traces of poison had been traced.

Professors have been waiting for the person who is responsible to slip up, to give us a clue. I don't think that will happen though. The process of these killings has been too thought out and well planned. I wouldn't be surprised if these mass killings have been planned months before, even maybe years. I've been talking to the ghosts to try and gather all details, even the potentially useless ones. When our headmaster made us heads keep tabs on everyone, the killings stopped for a short amount of time. It was like the mastermind was creating a way to best us, to get past the "little inconvenience." It didn't take long for them to find the weak parts in the plan.

What we have got though, is that every single student killed has been a muggle-born. A classic case of an unfair stigma around the poor wizards and witches. They never were able to catch a break. Amelia, one of my close friends in the friend group. She's a muggle-born, hence the shaking of her hands. I've been keeping a closer eye on her, she doesn't leave my side. She comes on my patrols so I can keep her in my sights, with of course the permission of the teachers. There are only two times that I can not watch over her. Those two times are covered by my other friend Devyn, a pure-blood. She also helps keep her safe, not letting her go anywhere by herself. The two times are because she's in two different classes than I am. One of them being a study hall.

~////////////////𓆙////////////////~

"Professor, how will this class help us now? Reading teacups for predictions should be the least of our worries right now," a student at the back of the room exclaims.

"The said predictions could lead us to the future before it happens. Our worries lay exactly what will happen in the future. If anything, this is one of the most important classes we'll take this year," I say, continuing to read the teacup.

"Precisely, thank you. Now go back to studying, I'll be coming around to view your interpretations."

My tea leaves look more like a blob with a cross going through them. A weirdly shaped blob. I already know there is a cross, but what about the blob? I tried shaking it a little, looking at the leaves from different angles. I already crossed off a club, falcon, and the sun. It could be an acorn, but I see a slight hole in the blob.

Could it be...

"A skull that is." I jump at the sudden voice near my ear. My teacup almost falling from my grasp.

"Pardon, a what?"

She points towards two holes in the blob, one of them I just mentioned, "I saw you already found one hole, there's the other. How it's shaped could be a little difficult to see since the cross is through it, but it's there."

The professor takes the cup from my hand and lays it on her desk. Some of my classmates look at me in curiosity, but they soon lose interest and go back to their own tea leaves.

A cross and a skull, that sounds about right to how my school year is going so far. I scan my book to see exactly what they mean.

A skull, danger in your path.

A cross, trials and suffering.

"What d-did you find?" A Hufflepuff boy to my right asks.

I don't want to scare the poor boy, he's already frightened enough as it is. If my future got around to the school, everyone would start being concerned about me. I'll barely get any of my duties done if I didn't already get it taken away for my safety. Last thing I need right now is even more panic.

"Nothing much, the future is still a little foggy."

"That's, um, good. I couldn't really read mine either," he chuckles lightly, almost seemingly forced.

Our professor claps her hands together, "Class is dismissed, read up about your predictions if you haven't already. No homework today."

I gather my books and push in my chair. Right before I could reach the door where other students are waiting, the teacher stops me.

"I'll have to tell the headmaster about this, I shouldn't keep it a secret."

"No, please don't. If you must, only tell Albus. I can't have this messing anything up, I'll become vulnerable."

The professor looks around the room, her eyes wandering franticly. I'm sure I am asking a lot from her. I really need her to keep this a secret.

"Oh alright, you're my best student. I just would hate to see anything happen to you. I'm informing only Albus to see if he can keep an eye on you."

"Thank you so much, I swear I'll be careful." A huge weight is lifted off my shoulders. I can't be worrying about my future when I have to worry about everyone else's.

I leave the classroom and start heading to my next class. Potions have always been one of my favorite classes. Mixing a bunch of toxins into a pot is a specialty of mine. I'm quickly scanning the halls for any wanderers, making sure everyone is at class. My feet take me to Potions in a hurry. I don't want to miss much, trying to make the class as informational as possible.

"You shouldn't be running, you still have 3 minutes of checking the school."

It's always him, I even tried changing routes to avoid him. His idiotic smirk, thinking he actually did something. All he did is waste my time and train of thought.

"I'm allowed to run Riddle, it's not a rule. I already checked the halls I was assigned, did you?" I really have no energy for this.

Tom peers down at me, somehow still wearing that infamous smile. Eyes bright, filled with mischief and knowledge.

"I have, double-checked as well. I'm sure you only checked once. Such irresponsible actions, I still wonder how you nabbed the head-girl spot."

I choose not to answer, not giving in to his baiting. Does he think I'm that stupid? That easily bothered by a simple test of my patience.

"You could have just said you wanted to walk me to class Riddle. No need to be shy with me."

"Shy, a concept I would not know of. Might as well bring you to class, since I'm heading there myself. Wouldn't want you to be in danger, since you consistently prove you can't handle a simple check of the hallways."

"I told you Tom-"

"Once is not enough, you should know that by now," he interrupts me, feigning a sudden serious facade on.

We start heading towards Slughorn's room. I'm a little behind his figure. Mostly looking down to make sure I don't step over his feet and fall. He sometimes walks with me, very confusing if I may say. Hating my skills, probably still hates me. You can often find us arguing if we are ever partners in class together. The usual game we play, how many questions can we get right by the end of class. Last time he won by one point, my sour mood not helping the atmosphere.

"You look rested, more than me at least," I smile tiredly. My whole body slightly sagging forward from exhaustion. He looks as proper as someone could be. His skin is a little pale though, brighter than usual. Almost like he was sick, his eyes look darker too. More sunken in, the shape of his skull more prominent. His looks still annoyingly well presented.

"Yes, you do look rather tired. I see other things have prioritized above your looks."

This man, the audacity of this man. The only reason I'm not at the top of every class. Our number 1 student count being evenly split. I have to bite down on my tongue forcefully to not say anything back. I'm too tired to truly come back with anything witty, so I choose to save myself from the embarrassment. Instead, I slightly step on his robe on the ground causing him to trip up a little.

He quickly sends a warning glare my way and then continues walking. I smile slightly, knowing even if it was petty, it was worth it.

Riddle doesn't even hold the door for me when we walk in. Causing it to slam dangerously close to my face.

"There you two are, I was afraid you weren't going to make it," Slughorn exclaims excitedly. "Turn your textbooks to page 246, we are going to learn how to make a Polyjuice potion!"

I glance at Tom, his eyes only focus on the words before him not realizing my gaze is on him. I wonder if he'll make this a competition as well. Knowing him, as well as me, anything but competition is out of our character. He looks up catching my eyes, I tilt my head. Trying to silently communicate from afar.

His head turns to Slughorn, then back to me. He nods his head and that's all it takes for both of us to come to an understanding. Whoever can answer the most questions, and create the best potion gets bragging rights.

I don't intend to lose.

#tom riddle x oc #tom riddle imagine #tom riddle #tom riddle x reader #lord voldemort #hogwarts #wizard #post wizarding war #enemies to allies #enemies to lovers #angst #oc #poc #Oc is any race #horcrux #moldy voldy

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script-nef · 3 years

Text

An actual break | Gojou Satoru

Category: fluff

2.6k words; Beach date [4/6]

← Previous chapter | Masterlist

You haven’t been to the beach in months. So a car trip for hours, where you can blank out and peer out of the window to enjoy the wonderful and ever-changing scenery is amazing. Dipping your feet in the water or eating from food vendors or enjoying the warm summer sun on your skin. Perhaps getting a tan if the weather is perfect. This would all be perfectly enjoyable and possible.

If it wasn’t for work.

“[Surname]-san, why are you coming with us? You said you can’t fight.” Itadori calls from the backseat, nestled not-so-comfortably between Fushiguro and Kugisaki.

Wouldn’t it be better if Kugisaki is in the middle since she’s the smallest and the skinniest? The thought drifts into your head but you soon understand why. As soon as the words leave his mouth it’s met with a firm and resounding slap on the arm. Itadori’s yelp of pain is silenced under her hiss of “God, you’re so tactless! Now move over, it’s getting cramped with all of the bags.” Ah, she didn’t want to sit in the middle. And what bags? I didn’t bring any.

They keep their banter up and a quick glance to both Gojou and Fushiguro indicates that they have no intention of stopping it. Gojou is actually humming through the bickering. Why do I have to be the adult? He’s like, 5 years older than me. That’s literally what he said as the reason to drive instead of you.

“It’s fine, Kugisaki-san. I’m coming along because there’s been a lot of cursed spirit activity around here and I need to see if something abnormal is happening. I’m not going to get in the way of the fight so you don’t need to worry.” You send Itadori a smile through the back mirror which he responds with a quick nod, then a confused look.

“Isn’t that Gojou-sensei’s responsibilities?” The mentioned adult laughs and smoothly makes a right turn. You want to slap him.

“Normally, yes, but he insists on being insufferable.” You turn to face them, leaning onto the seat with a scowl. “The report he made was nearly illegible and last time something like this happened, and I had to sit down with him for 3 hours to complete it. Even then, he was going off topic half the time and trying to distract me. Itadori-kun, Kugisaki-san, listen to me. If he doesn’t do his work, you have to practically force him.”

“Doesn’t work.” Fushiguro comments while looking out the window. Gojou has the audacity to laugh again.

“We had a great time! You were laughing your head off by the time we were done.” A light tug on your shirt makes you sit back properly. The scowl stays in place.

“I missed dinner! And I missed the last episode of Haikyuu thanks to that!”

“Fine, fine. I’ll take it up by buying you dinner, okay?” He must be kidding if that makes up for missing your favourite anime. Kuroo came and went thanks to him. The car comes to an abrupt stop just as you’re about to complain again. “We have arrived!”

Salt wafts in the air as the sea twinkles underneath the afternoon sun. It’s hot today, and humid enough to make your clothes stick to your skin, which is gross. Sunny and warm means a swim will be ideal, but you have to take care of the whole recurring curses thing first. Previous reports have said that they were all mid-level, so hopefully Gojou’s students won’t have that much of a problem taking care of them. That also means they, including you as well, might have the opportunity to relax for the rest of the day.

The actual spot is somewhere in the nearby forest, filled thick with trees and so large that even if someone went missing it would take ages to search. An ideal hunting place since a lot of people visit there. Numbers dropped quite a bit after the fifth person “went missing”.

The first task is to cover the place with a curtain. Since the place is so large and not encompassing the entire place was deemed too risky, large amounts of cursed energy is required. Hence Gojou’s efforts right now.

“[Name]-san.” Kugisaki calls you. “Are you coming in with us?” Her voice is tentative, like she doesn’t want to offend you. It’s kind of funny because she shows more respect for you than her actual teacher for some reason. Gojou complained about it before. She doesn’t know the extent, or more accurately the lack of, your powers and has a right to be worried. All she knows is that you can’t fight.

“Ah, I am coming in, but I’ll stay far away from the fight. You don’t need to worry about me.”

“And I’ll be right by her side!” Gojou snaps into thin air, linking his arm with yours. “Your personal bodyguard! But I’m sure you guys can handle this one.” Still humming a tune, he sends them along their way with a reassuring smile. You smile at Kugisaki and wish her good luck. Shooting Gojou a suspicious glare, she runs ahead to the two boys and starts whispering. They look back at the two of you and get into what seems to be an argument. A bad thing to do right before a possibly life-threatening mission.

You watch the group disappear deeper into the woods, fear gripping at your heart. This is actually the first time in the field after years of being tucked away in an office. Ken-chan specifically requested it due to your unique cursed energy situation. Apparently that was the first time he asked for a favour to the principle and he never asked for anything again. They can handle themselves, you’re sure, but Itadori already had a close call.

“Worried?” Gojou, on the other hand, sounds like he has no concerns in the world. Maybe that’s a testament to how much he trusts his students. It doesn’t alleviate your agitation. “It’s fine, we can just take a break here and if trouble comes, they can take care of it themselves.” You stare at him incredulously. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding! I’ll step in if something goes wrong. You’re all in safe hands.”

There is no one better than him in terms of fighting with cursed energy. How on earth someone like this gets imbued with endless power, you’ll never know. Sighing, you take a seat on a fallen log. The moss on them tickles your fingers. It feels nice, something to distract you from your brain being its usual bastard and thinking the worst case scenario. Gojou plops himself down right next to you.

“We can go see them if you’re that worried, mother hen.” Nudging his leg shuts him up. Closing your eyes, you concentrate on reaching out for their cursed energy. Eight signals flicker from where they went, three blazing stronger than the others. One of them is nearly blinding. Sukuna is on a completely different level. If there’s that much of a difference in energy, they’ll finish soon and come back to have fun for the rest of the day. God knows they need it.

Your eyes flit open and come face to face with Gojou’s blindfold. It causes you to fall backwards and you brace for impact with a little yelp. But Gojou’s arm surrounds your abdomen, lifting you into the air and onto your feet. Heartbeats thud in your ears thanks to the sudden adrenaline boost.

“Did I scare you?” His laugh is cheeky. “I’m bored… Wanna play 20 questions?” As usual, his train of thought is impossible to even attempt to follow. A window of hundreds of tabs wrestling to be the first all the time is probably what the inside of his mind looks like.

“Sure, why not.”

Fushiguro, Itadori and Kugisaki all perk up when they receive the news of a day off to enjoy the beach. Since it’s closed off to the civilians, it’ll be like a private party. Something to keep their mind off of another mission that’s bound to come soon.

While they run off to the beach, you go to talk to the park rangers for the paperwork. Gojou asks if you want company but someone needs to supervise the children. The process takes barely 10 minutes anyway.

When you come back to the beach, the trio is screaming in the sea while trying to fight each other. Even Fushiguro is laughing. Childlike innocence is beautiful and long overdue. Two huge parasols and towels are laid out nearby where they’re playing. Gojou is out of his usual attire and in a swimming trunk. His blindfold is still on. Is this what was in the bags?

Now that you look more closely at the students, they’re all in swimwear as well. Looks like you’re the only one that didn’t get a memo.

“Heya! Done?”

“No thanks to you, Mr The-Whole-Reason-I’m-Here-In-The-First-Place.” He laughs at the nickname.

“You should change.”

“I didn’t bring a swimsuit. Nobody told me and I was just thinking of dipping my feet.”

“Nobara brought you one. It’s in the bag labelled ‘If you look inside I’m going to kill you.’” Laughter comes out at the absurdity.

“Why did Kugisaki—”

“Because she wants you to relax. Now come on! Let’s have fun!” he pushes you excitedly towards the car. It’s really weird how someone your senior has more energy than you and his three students combined. Sighing, you trek back and find the bag. It really is labelled that, in caps. Kugisaki is a good kid.

There’s a bathroom nearby for you to change in. The wind is still pretty strong when you walk out but you’re saved thanks to the school jacket. There’s also a pair of flip-flops. Ken-chan must have helped since they all fit perfectly.

Itadori is being half-drowned when you come back. Fushiguro and Kugisaki are merciless when it comes to fighting. Gojou smiles as you walk into his line of sight. Scooting over to let you into the shade, he lies back onto the towel and stretches his legs out into the sun with a slight groan. You stay sitting up, watching the three children absentmindedly.

Sunlight tickles your feet. The sea breeze stops it from being too hot but it’s slowly getting stuffier under the jacket. Quickly discarding it, Gojou catches your eyes while you fold it up.

It’s impossible to tell if he’s awake or sleeping thanks to his signature blindfold, but this is the most relaxed you’ve seen him in years; hands folded behind his head and muscles completely loose. Small scars dot his body, probably gained from fights which he deemed insignificant enough to bother Shouko with or heal himself. In a way, it’s a reminder for all the battles he’s survived. Pretty easily too, you’re guessing. There’s a deep one on his stomach and your hand moves towards it for some reason.

Long fingers intercept your hand just before it touches the scratched skin, entwining themselves to you. One end of Gojou’s lips quirks up.

“I’m going to be embarrassed if you keep looking at my body, you know.” You immediately attempt to rip your hand back but he’s got you locked tight. He’s not even using Infinity. Heat threatens to explode your face because he’s been awake all this time and you’re going to die from shame. “If you wanted to touch me then you could have just asked.” Your fingers graze against the skin on his stomach for a split second but he loosens his grip and you will be damned if you don’t take that chance.

Gojou cackles, enjoying your flustered state, and he’s halfway to suffocation because he’s laughing too much. His instincts still allow him to move out of the way for your punch. Doesn’t stop him from laughing though. Even his students, who were screaming and playing like they didn’t have a care in the world, are looking at the two of you. God, where’s a hole for me to die in right now?

Eventually, his laughter dies off. He’s still chuckling though. His teeth glint in the light as he gives you a wide smile. A sense of foreboding washes over you.

“Up we go!”

“What?” Two arms hook under your knees and back, lifting you effortlessly into the air. Your body bounces in his arms every time he takes a step closer to the sea.

“Wait Gojou, wait wait wait wait!”

“Gojou-sensei wai—”

The water is freezing.

“Gojou Satoru, I’m going to kill you!”

“That’s admirable! I’m sure you can do it!” Fushiguro snickers as you swipe an arm at Gojou, who moves away effortlessly again. Hair is plastered to your face and this rage is not going to subside unless you rip the blindfold off his smirking face and dunk his head into the water. But he keeps dodging you, just barely, as if to taunt you further.

Exhaustion sets in quickly since moving around in water is a lot harder and anger eats away at your stamina. Just as you’re about to give up, Gojou’s face is slapped with a wave of water. Everyone looks to Kugisaki. She has the biggest smile you’ve ever seen.

“Pfft.” Fushiguro’s laughter breaks the silence. Itadori snickers at Gojou’s drooping hair. Soon everyone’s laughing. Then Gojou whips water that hits all three of them straight in the chest with a resounding smack. They immediately retaliate with a wave that you get caught up in.

It somehow turns into a students vs adults fight. Delighted laughter echoes in the air as everyone yells and shrieks when assaulted with icy water. There’s an unspoken rule to not use cursed energy, which is why your side is being pushed back. There’s no beating three excited kids when they’re on a holiday high.

Backtracking a bit to get away from the constant surges of water, you don’t realise you’re going deeper and deeper into the sea. A rock shifts underneath your feet and you’re plunged into the cold grips of the sea, not even given enough time to call for help. Panic overtakes your senses as you squeeze your eyes shut, hands scrambling for something to hold onto.

“[Name]!” Warmth engulfs you as Gojou lifts you out of the murky depth, worry and dread weaved into his voice. You blink rapidly as he gently brushes the hair off your face, and you see his eyes without the blindfolds for the first time. “Look at me, are you alright?”

They’re… indescribably beautiful. It’s the purest and translucent blue you’ve seen in your life, able to beat the colour of the ocean or the sky on its clearest days. It could compete with even the most exquisite sapphire locked up in a vault underground. And they’re clouded with concern and fear because of you.

“[Surname]-san!” Bringing yourself up by hugging Gojou’s neck, you see the trio wading through the water to you, dread clear on their faces. Itadori reaches you and rapidly asks if you’re fine and that he can’t possibly describe how sorry he is. It looks like he’ll dig his head into the ocean floor if you ask him to do it. Like he’s waiting for you to reprimand him.

But all that comes out is laughter, bright and childlike. They all look at you like you’re crazy. You have no idea why you’re laughing either. Maybe you’ve finally gone insane.

But being in Gojou’s arms, seeing his and Itadori’s face relax, brings you so much happiness. Tightening your arms around Gojou’s neck, you rest your head on top of his as he calms them down.

Maybe it’s the adrenaline from nearly drowning, maybe it’s something else, but your heart thumps rapidly into your ribcage, probably loud enough for him to feel.

Next chapter →

#gojou x reader #gojou satoru x reader #gojou imagine #gojou satoru imagine #gojo x reader #gojo imagine #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru imagine #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk imagine #jujutsu kaisen imagine #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #gojou #gojou satoru #fluff #series #female reader

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katieraven · 3 years

Text

sleep is so tough

Summary: your attempt at dealing with losing Bucky is unsuccessful and results in a sleepless night - for several reasons.

Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes/female reader

Warnings: angst!!, happy ending (because I can't write sad endings for the life of me), a lot of metaphors, thoughts about death, loss and grieving, a tiny description of a panic attack

Word count: 3227

Notes: @babycap you wonderful human! 600 followers is huge and i am very happy about this fic. the prompt was: "I wanna be in your touch / Sleep is so tough" - James Bay, Chew On My Heart and I wrote a lil something that i'm kinda happy with. do enjoy!

love,

katie

It’s the same nightmare. You recognise it from the last three weeks, you’ve been here before. Doesn’t make it easier to shake out of it. You watch him convulse, face torn and twisted somewhere between pain and the desperate attempt to keep his free will. The fight against the venomous words the HYDRA agent hurls at him. They’re like daggers, needles stuck into his brain, rewiring him. And all you can do is watch. You are frozen in place in the torture your subconsciousness puts you through. Again. And again. And again.

You can’t will your eyes to tear away from him. He snarls like a cornered animal at the agents around him. Then the final words. “грузовой вагон“. Freight car. You don’t know Russian, but those ten phrases have been burned into your brain. You could recite them in your sleep.

Bucky stills. He slowly stands up from his crouched position, cold stare fixed onto the speaking agent. “Я готов отвечить“.

You startle awake, the nightmare finally loosening its grasp on your consciousness. Immediately, your hands fly to the other side of the bed. It is cold and empty and your stomach drops when realisation hits you like a punch to the gut.

This is not a nightmare. At least not entirely, no. It is a memory. Because you saw the footage. You saw Bucky convulse and bend and snap and straighten. And you saw Steve, heard his scream as Sam pulled him away, forcing him to leave his best friend in the hands of his torturers. Steve knows it was the right thing to do. You do, too. The thought of Bucky being all alone behind enemy lines still makes your breath hitch in your throat, though.

They didn’t want you to see the footage, it wasn’t supposed to be something you get confronted with. But you slipped into the room, originally meaning to talk to Natasha about some software to try out in the next mission. They didn’t notice you entering, eyes trained on a screen, FRIDAY running facial recognition in the background. They kept playing the footage over, and over, and over, and again, looking for any kind of clue as to where they could find him, until your knees gave out under you and you fell with a whimper leaving your throat. Natasha was the first to understand the situation. Steve let out a string of colourful curses you would have never stopped teasing him about, hadn’t you been trying to wrap your mind around what you just saw.

If you had known they were back already, you would have noticed him missing and asked. But you didn’t even know they were back. And then he was gone.

You finally open your eyes. The New York night tints the white ceiling a blueish sort of grey and you feel like someone painted the inside of your heart onto the concrete. A perfect replica. Grey inside. Empty. Broken and alone, left to try and fail to put yourself back together.

Your fingers curl into a fist around the cold and empty bedsheets. They have been empty for three weeks now, and your body has no tears left to give. So you lie there, silent sobs violently breaking free from the void that is your chest. Sometimes you don’t know if your heart is beating, still, and your hands can’t find it in them to check. It wouldn’t be so bad to die, you think. There’s not much keeping you here.

Steve visits every few days. He carries the same hollow look in his eyes, like someone snuffed out the light behind them and carelessly forgot to turn it back on. With the sole difference that he is better at hiding it. It is only when he thinks nobody is watching that the sticky navy blue ink that is grief seeps into his face and turns his eyes empty and his face pale. You don’t mention it.

You know it’s supposed to help, sharing grief. Which is why you open the door when he visits, and don’t turn him away. He needs it, too, you suppose. So you sit on your sofa in front of the tv and watch something stupid and mindless that none of you pay attention to and both of you pretend to find acutely intriguing whenever the other is looking.

It’s all a giant game of pretend. SHIELD is feigning confidence in finding him. Everyone else oozes positivity whenever they talk about the mission. But it’s false, and hollow, and the truth of it sneers at you through translucent optimism.

You turn your head to look at the alarm clock on your bedside table. 4:36 a.m. That means you slept an astonishing three hours. That’s two more than yesterday. You’re not afraid of the nightmares anymore. You know they will come. The terror shaking you night after night has become a companion, just as the grief following closely in everything you do. It looms over you at night, hides in the shadows behind the furniture in your living room, joined by Steve’s whenever he’s there.

You were afraid to fall asleep, yes. Pulled two all-nighters in the first days after. By now you have learned to read the signs your body so openly presents you with and you know you will not fall asleep again tonight. So you lie there, hand splayed over the empty right side of the bed, eyes staring through the ceiling.

Fuck, you miss him. It rolls over you unexpectedly and your body seizes, curling up into a fetal position as your obviously alive and beating heart pumps sharp agony through your veins. He is gone. You know, of course, you understood before and this feeling is familiar, but for the first time, it truly settles inside you. Bucky is gone.

The man you imagined a future with, who handed you his broken and bruised heart and trusted you to fix it, is gone. The charming wooden home near the sea you always talked about when his nightmares were too much and too real slowly turns to dust between your grasping fingers. You feel it slip. The bell-like high pitched laughter of a young child evaporating in your mind.

You feel your heart break. There has been a dull ache in your chest for weeks. You’ve gotten used to it, embraced it into your menagerie of demons and ghosts, grief and loss. But it betrays you, right now, as you feel your heart pound against the cage of your ribs, and it burns. You still lie curled into yourself, blanket tangled between your legs. You will explode. You feel it with a new certainty, this will kill you. You breathe in and out, you know you do, but none of the air arrives in your lungs. It leaves you desperately gasping for oxygen.

Until you realise none of it is real. Because your heart is not here in your room with you, your heart lies in the mismatched hands of a broken soldier somewhere between here and the sea. It can’t kill you here, because there is an organ-sized hole in your chest and the coldness of the world tears at your exposed ribcage with icy shrapnel-sharp claws. Does it bleed? If so, you can’t feel the warmth. Blood is warm, right? Bucky always said it is.

You exhale slowly. Will your seizing muscles to relax, to let you go. To your surprise they do, and you inhale again, cold night air. It doesn’t yet escape through the wound in your chest. The hole hasn’t reached your lungs yet. But you know it will consume you, leave no part of you untouched, unbroken, will rip you apart for all your demons to finally feast on what is left of you.

Maybe he will find you first, you muse. Maybe HYDRA will find the last bit of mercy in them and send him after you, to cut his strings. You know you will not fight when he does. It would be a sweet oblivion with his eyes the last thing you see. Grey irises like molten silver when the sunlight hits just right.

Your arms fold against your chest. The skin is whole, not a scratch, no bleeding wound. You know it can’t be true. It is simply your minds way of processing this pain. Your imagination fixed the hole but you know it’s still there, still gaping. You can feel the edges burning where the hole ends and the marred skin starts. But you live. Still this broken body carries you on, one day after another.

You sit up in your sheets, hair plastered against your forehead by the thin film of sweat covering your body. As your back straightens, the metallic clinking of dog tags root you into this reality and you pull them out from under one of Bucky’s black shirts you’re wearing.

“Keep these,” he murmurs and presses something hard into your open palm. You look down and see the two thin pieces of metal piled on top of each other, embossed letters spelling his name, his full name. Your stunned eyes flicker back up into his and you open your mouth to protest, but he shushes you with a finger.

“It’s not like I need them. If I die, this thing” – he gestures to his arm – “will tell everyone who I am. But I want you to have these.”

Your thumb smoothes over the plates, shoving them against each other. “I mean … I won’t complain, but why do you …?”

He shrugs, embarrassment tinting his cheeks. “I don’t know, I guess it feels like a part of me stays with you, y’know? A physical part. So that you have something real to hold onto until I’m back.”

It hits you, then, that he’s leaving. He picks the tags up and puts them around your neck and you reach for his hands, fingers closing around his forearms. “Don’t leave me, Bucky. Please, I can’t lose you –“

He puts his hands on either side of your face and kisses your nose, before looking directly at you. “You won’t lose me, you hear? I’ll always be with you. Always.”

But now he’s gone, and you close your fist around the metal tags until they push into your palms, and harder until they cut the delicate skin. You want to be angry at him but you can’t. It’s not his fault. It’s not his fault he couldn’t keep his promise.

You steady your breathing. Eyes wander to the red numbers on your alarm. 5:23. No use trying to sleep anymore, you decide, and sit up. Might as well make coffee. Maybe you can get something done today. Clean the laundry up at least, so Steve doesn’t have this awfully concerned look on his face next time he visits.

It takes you a couple of minutes to actually, physically, move. In your mind you’re already in the kitchen, filling the coffee maker with water and watching the coffee slowly dribble into the pot below. It has something therapeutic, one drop at a time. Almost meditative.

But, well, you do have to walk over into the kitchen to reach this point of short-lived meditative oblivion. So you swing your legs over the edge of the bed, and your eyes fall onto the covered mirror in the corner. It’s floor-length, and you used to love being able to admire your whole outfit in there without having to stand on your tiptoes.

Like that one time before one of Tony’s extravagant galas, when you tried to get a good look at yourself and the glamourous dress that, as Natasha had pointed out, would look amazing on your figure. She had been right – naturally. But the tiny mirror in your bathroom hadn’t shown the whole thing and so you were leaning over the sink to try and look. Which was exactly the moment Bucky chose to walk into the room, only to promptly wear an affectionately amused smirk on his face, assuring you of your otherworldly beauty (“Oh come on, Buck, don’t mock me – “ “I’m not, you are otherworldly, doll, dazzling even!”) and pointing out that you were in desperate need of a floor-length mirror.

In the first few days of Bucky’s absence, you hung a bedsheet over it because you couldn’t bear the memory. In fact, you can’t recall the last time you actually looked at yourself. With utmost certainty, though, you can say that your skin must be grey and sunken and the darkened circles under your eyes a deeper shade of purple than when you were knee-deep in college finals. God, that time seems ages away. If you hadn’t gone to college then maybe you wouldn’t be in this situation – you would have certainly never ended up at SHIELD. For a second you wish you hadn’t. This pain would not be part of your reality, then.

But then again, you wouldn’t have met him at all. And as much as this, right now, hurts, you wouldn’t trade it with any reality in the universe if it meant not knowing him. Not loving him. Not knowing his deepest, darkest secrets that he only opened up about after one particularly bad nightmare, with his head in your lap, not daring to meet your eyes.

No, if this pain is the price for his love then you will take it. You will let it eat at you until there is nothing left except your hollowed shell of a body because it will have been worth it.

You walk past the covered mirror and open the door, bare feet against the cold kitchen floor. You go to reach for the coffee maker when something registers with you. Something out of place, a slight inconsistency in your regulated, never-changing surroundings. You barely see it in your periphery.

Your movements still and your head slowly turns toward what is undoubtedly someone sitting in your living room. The moonlight glints on his left shoulder and you realise, within the smallest fractions of a second, who it is.

The hollow excuse for a heart that sits in your chest sputters and stills, before springing back into action twice as fast. He came back.

A steady stillness settles over you as you understand the situation. They sent him. Loose ends and all. Yet you’re not afraid, this death will be quick and quiet. It gives you an odd sensation of peace, to know that his will be the last face you see – even if it is the Winter Soldier’s face. But they’re still Bucky’s eyes.

“It’s okay”, you whisper.

His intent gaze never leaves you as you slowly, deliberately walk towards him, step by step. You know that Bucky is in there, too, and you need him to understand that you accept this. That it is not his fault. That you are ready to die if it is at his hands.

There is an unusual uncertainty in the Soldier’s eyes. You have seen footage of him, cold expression, a sort of stone-hearted efficiency about his movements, never a step too much. He has not moved yet. You feel every bit of skin on your feet connecting to the wooden floor as you move towards him, slowly, but steadily. If this is how you are meant to go, then you will.

You’re only three feet away from him as you stop. His eyes followed you all the way there. Now they start to flicker over your face, your body, confusion slowly but definitely showing in the crinkles on his forehead. He opens his mouth and you hold your breath.

“I –“, it comes out croaky, like he hasn’t used his voice in forever, so he clears his throat and starts again.

“I know you.”

Your lungs deflate, shakily. He hasn’t killed you yet. If he hasn’t killed you yet, why is he here? The Winter Soldier doesn’t hesitate. The uncertainty in his face sparks something deep, deep inside of you that you thought dead by now. Hope.

His eyes find their way back to your face and he is searching it now, not the stoic, cold mask of the Winter Soldier. You don’t dare speak. The fingers of his left hand flex with an electric whirr.

“I know you, but …” he trails off.

His right fist opens, fingers seemingly involuntarily reaching out. You step closer and lower yourself down, bare knees on the wood flooring, eyes not leaving his.

“I remember you.”

His voice is steadier now, more confident that he does, in fact, know you. That there is something inside his brain, something more than just the Soldier. More than just the missions. Just the trigger.

His hand, the real one, reaches towards your face and you close your eyes upon contact, a shaky breath leaving your lips. His index and middle finger trail across your cheekbone. Follow the curve of your lips. Trace your eyebrows. Your eyes flicker open and your breath gets caught in your throat because there he is, there he is, his eyes his own.

“Bucky –“

His name leaves your lips, a choked sob partially escaping. He blinks. Still, his eyes are his own. His lips part and then he whispers your name and you are certain this is a dream. A change of pace from the violent nightmares of late, but still a dream, because this can’t be true. How could it be.

But the hardwood floor is rough against your knees and his hand is warm against your cheek and he is there. He slides off the chair onto the ground before you and you feel hot tears spill from your open, disbelieving eyes. His other hand reaches for your face and then he’s holding you there, so unbelievably gentle, his eyes tortured and lined in purple but undeniably his own.

“You came back”, is the first real thing you say to him.

His thumb smoothes over the dark bruise under your eye, proof of sleepless nights and tired days.

“I’m so sorry”, is the first thing he says to you in his own voice.

You close your eyes, lids pushing tears over the edge and you let them drip down onto your bare thighs as you shake your head, a soft smile on your lips.

“There is nothing you need to be sorry about. None of this was your fault.”

“I – you’re hurt”, he states, matter-of-factly, and your eyes open again.

You try and put everything into your eyes, everything you feel, the hope, the relief, the love. Most of all the love.

“But you’re back. That’s all that matters. Do you hear me?”

His grey irises swim with regret and pain and fear and yet you see love in them. You gently touch your forehead to his and he sighs, eyelids fluttering closed.

“I love you, and you’re back, and that’s all that matters.”

The cold seeps into your body from the floor, your knees scraping against the hardwood. Neither of you dares to move, the calm of the situation too delicate, neither sure if this is real or just a particularly cruel dream. But it is too beautiful to disturb and so both of you remain where you are, hands gently touching the other. Thankful for this moment of peace.

Forgot my taglist consisting of one wonderful person: @mannien

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jtsfavslut · 3 years

Text

Falling [G.D]

Description: Just when Y/N thought she was over Grayson, he pops back into her life, making her wonder if you could fall for the same person twice. Inspired by ‘Falling’ - Harry Styles.

Warnings: None, Just sad stuff lmao!!!

Word Count: 4K+

Also a special thanks to cole [ @blazedgraysons] for keeping up with my annoying ass questions while I wrote this, and for helping me and giving me advice I love you <333

Her small feet carried her body down the familiar street, cars zooming past her as her body softly bumped into the others around her. The loud sounds from the environment being blocked away by the soft, yet loud music that was coming out of an old pair of Airpods she had gotten for Christmas back in High School.

This was Y/N's daily routine. Get up early in the morning, do her business in the bathroom, get dressed, and walk over to her favorite cafe. The Beachwood cafe had become Y/N's second home ever since she moved to L.A, spending most of her time there, before and after class.

A smile lit up her face as the familiar blue door came into her view, a content sigh falling past her lips as she got closer to the door.

The strong smell of coffee hit her nostrils as she walked inside, music being paused as she walked fully inside, giving her attention to the cashier that greeted her every morning, "Hi Y/N, your stuff is on your table," she smiled up at Y/N before pointing towards her usual table.

It was the one by the window in the corner of the shop, the bright yellow and blue floor illuminated her small journey to the table, where her coffee and breakfast sandwich happily waited for her to approach. She sat down, hand reaching into her Yellow Kanken backpack, another Christmas gift from high school that she dearly took care of, she pulled out a brown journal and a pen.

A journal filled with memories and random thoughts that popped in her head. Y/N thought writing things down was good for the mind and body. She believed that writing things down would help you keep your thoughts safely, and lock memories into place without overworking your mind. A pen that has been through many journeys on the same yet different page.

All pages were the same until the pen went over it, recording things until the end of time. They were all the same until she wrote down her thoughts for the day.

Her small hand gripped onto the pen as she wrote down her thoughts from the previous night, coffee cup in the other hand as she slowly sipped the liquid.

Last night I thought of him again, just until I drifted off. I don't know why. It hasn't happened in months. Nothing bad, just a memoir of all of our memories together. Like the time we broke into the school's pool one night. Where he pushed me in with all my clothes on, then he jumped in and we made out by the stairs. Funny how we never got caught since cameras were around us. Or when we had our senior trips to the mountains in Colorado, and how he kept sneaking into the girls' room just to be with me. We were lucky we didn't get caught again. I tried to not keep thinking about him. I know it's time to finally drop it and move on, but how? How do I erase all those memories from my brain? How am I supposed to just drop it and move along? Just how? I don't need or want to know why just how.

She softly slammed the notebook closed, right before she could feel a slight burning in her eyes and a rock starting to form in her throat. The subject of her and a past lover that she was still holding onto, still being a deep wound to her.

She thought about and remembered Grayson every day. After all, he was her everything during her entire High School life, and he still was…...sort of. Grayson and Y/N started dating in the 9th grade, right about in the middle of the year. He asked her out behind the school's bleachers during lunchtime, a mixture of flowers from his mom's garden that she shyly accepted from him after she said yes. That was followed by their date to the movie theater, where he held her close to him every time she faked being a little scared, not that he could tell, and three dates after he officially asked her out where she said yes again, and that was followed by an accidental kiss, he was leaning towards her cheek when she accidentally moved her head to the side, causing his lips to land on hers. Neither of them complained, just smiled at each other and carried on.

They went on for 6 years, all of high school and two college years, where he decided to break it off because of distance. He went off on how being across the country from one another was hard, and the fact that the time difference from New York to California was 3 and 4. She didn't complain. Didn't give a reason as to why not, even if she had trillions of them. She didn't try to change his mind. She simply said okay, and wished him the best. She still loved him though.

The words that her grandpa had spoken replayed in her brain every time she questioned why she still thought about him; "You never stop loving anyone sugar, you just kinda love someone stronger. If you stop loving them, then you never loved them to begin with" She thought about that, and that made her feel better. Maybe there was someone out there who she would love more than she loved Grayson.

With a quiet sigh, she put her journal away, switching it with a book she picked up at the library a few days prior, yet read a million times.

To Kill A Mockingbird is a book she read many times in school, mostly everyone has. It's the one book from school she actually enjoyed, so she picked it up from the book shop down the street from her apartment before work one day, and didn't get to read it until now.

She opened the book with a small smile, the sensation of the book against her finger bringing nothing but happiness to her, and took her mind off whatever was bothering her. She lost herself in the book, almost done with half of the book before her alarm rang, signaling it was time for work. She left a 20 on the table after putting all her stuff away in her backpack and walking out of the shop and towards her job which was a paid internship at a local hospital downtown, all she did was watch and help out with minor cases like cuts, sprains, X Ray's and the occasional stuff like questioning. She entered the hospital, sanitizing herself and changing into her uniform, walking over to her area, that being the Pediatrics Emergency room where her boss, mentor, whatever you might want to call him, Dr. Reyez, and the rest of the team were waiting for her.

"Morning everyone," she chirped at the tired yet awake health care workers, who all had smiles on their faces. "Morning Y/N, you're going to be practicing by yourself today, can you handle it?" Dr. Reyez asked her, which she just nodded her head with a smile. There wasn't a single ounce of doubt in her brain.

"I'm pretty sure yes! And I can just reach out to you guys if anything, right?"

"Yeah, just page us if anything. Your first patient should be here soon, just go wait by the desk," Reyez instructed her and that's exactly what she did. She sat on the desk for over 20 minutes until someone came in with a toddler covered in rashes.

"Hi baby, I just need to ask you and mommy a few questions, yeah?" She sweetly and patiently asked the 5 year old as his mom was filling out some papers, to which he just nodded his head.

"Okay, Xavion, did you eat something new today? Maybe something you've never eaten?" She asked and both the mom and son nodded their heads.

"Do you think he was allergic to something?" The mom asked, causing Y/N to shrug.

"Well, it depends. We need to get an allergy test for him. It doesn't hurt or anything, we just scratch and pour a drop of the allergen over it and see how they react. Mom, do you happen to remember what he ate today for the first time?" She replied by recording some notes down on her clipboard before telling a nurse to get an Allergy Antibody Test ready.

"He ate everything that he usually does except for some broccoli I gave him," the mom replied and Y/N nodded her head before writing it down on her clipboard and walking them to the testing room.

Once the results came back around half an hour later, Xavion was, in fact, allergic to broccoli, and other things that Y/N had to explain to the mother. She got about 15 minutes of break time before Reyez called her another minor emergency.

"It's an 11 year old, possible breakage or sprain to the leg, you can handle this one right?" He asked and she nodded her head, "Good, they're in room 217, good luck," he added before sending her off to the room.

She quickly made her way over to it, grabbing her clipboard on the way, "Hi, I'm Dr.Y/LN, I'm going to be taking care of you guys today! May I have the child's name and date of birth please?" She nicely asked as she walked inside the room, quickly walking over to the desk area that was in the corner and placing her stuff down.

"Uhhh, Caleb Dolan, August 17, 2008," a deep voice that she could recognize from anywhere spoke as she turned around. Her heart dropped at the sight of Grayson in front of her. She tried to reassemble herself, after all, she couldn't make any mistakes right now, Reyez was trusting her and she couldn't afford to mess the opportunity up.

"Caleb, August 17, 2008," she mumbled as she wrote it down on her piece of paper, "Caleb, do you mind telling me what happened, babe?" She asked with a smile on her face. Her smile turned into a small frown as she looked up at the boy who happened to be in pain.

"Me and uncle Gray were practicing for the soccer game that's next and I fell on the mud and hit my leg really hard," he explained as she walked towards him nodding her head.

"On a scale of 1 to 10, One being okay while 10 being the worst, how would you rate the pain?" She asked, walking over to the walk to grab a pair of gloves, putting them on, and walking back towards him.

"Uhh a seven," he replied and she nodded her head.

"Okay Caleb, just know this might hurt a little okay? It's just protocol to check if it's dislocated, broken, or sprained okay?" She asked and he nodded his head, a few tears falling down his face from fear. Grayson quickly leaned down to wipe off his face whispering a quiet 'you'll be okay' as Caleb grabbed his hand.

"Can you try and move your ankle for me? Just try and move it," she explained and he muttered at quiet yes before moving his foot in a slow circle, she nodded her head before placing both hands over his ankle checking for any bumps, which there were none to find, "Luckily for you Caleb, it's just sprained! There are no bumps meaning it's not dislocated, and you can move it meaning it's not fractured! Just to make sure, we're going to need an X Ray' just to make sure there are no hidden surprises yeah? Dr. Lindsey will do those with you, and I'll be right here when you come back," she smiled up at the boy before Dr. Lindey moved him to a wheelchair and took him to the X Ray room, leaving Y/N and Grayson alone in painful silence.

"So this is what you do? This is where you work?" Grayson was the first to speak after a couple of quiet seconds,

She cleared her throat and nodded her head, placing her hands inside her white jacket, "Yeah. It's a paid internship so it's basically a job, what about you? What are you doing here?" She asked to make direct eye contact with him.

"Moved here after me and E graduated, looking for some roles and an agent," he spoke, his voice not as deep yet shakier than when he first spoke.

"Any luck with that?"

"Yeah. We've landed a few small roles here and there," he answered and she just nodded her head.

"That's good! I'm glad everything's working out for you," She gave him a genuine smile before continuing to fill out Caleb's paperwork.

"Listen, I know it's been 2 years but-," Grayson began to speak before Y/N cut him off. "-Grayson just don't. I'm at work right now, and it's enough seeing you after 2 years, but I don't really need this right now. I'm sorry," She apologized before leaving the room to get some papers before walking back in, thankfully Caleb was already in the room when she walked in.

"I'm going to wrap your ankle up with this and then you're good to go, buddy. Make sure you don't apply pressure on it for two weeks. And carefully when you're playing any sport, I don't want you back here," she said while wrapping his ankle up carefully. She gave Grayson the discharge papers, their hands touching each other for a split second before she pulled away waving them off before walking to where her team was.

"That guy was looking at you intensely," Reyez pointed out, earning a glare from her.

"Don't even start," she rolled her eyes before taking a sip from her water bottle that was on her desk.

"Wait is that the?" Jacob, one of the nurses, asked and she nodded her head.

"Yeah, that's him," she sighed, shaking her head.

"Holly shit Y/N, I knew you said he was hot, but girl? That man is hotter than-,"

"Mackenzie, don't you dare," Y/N joked towards her other co-worker, "God why do you do this to me? I was almost over him and then you put him on my path again? The universe hates me,"

"I'd go for it again if I were you," Mackenzie encouraged earning a glare from her.

"Alright, leave her alone before she starts to crumble, Mackenzie go fill out reports, Y/N go take a breather," Reyez ordered them around and they all nodded their heads, going on their way to do what they were told.

. . .

Soft snores began to quietly run past her lips as she drifted off to sleep, all before a feeling of suddenly falling down an empty whole woke her up. She shook her head letting out a quiet 'fuck' before turning to look towards the clocks on her nightstand, 3:30 AM being brightly displayed on it. Y/N let out a loud sigh, knowing she wouldn't be going back to sleep anytime soon.

Her mind suddenly clouded with knotted thoughts and notions, too many of them just to focus on a single one. She pushed her body up, just enough for her to reach over and grab the small yellow backpack that she lazily threw on the floor, pulling her journal and pen out before throwing it back on the floor.

She clicked the pen and opened the journal, blank pages waiting to be filled up, her hand delicately moved along the paper as she scribbled letters and words on the empty pages, thoughts clearing out of her head, one by one.

I saw him today. He looked different. He's grown. After it all, it has been two years. His voice is deeper too. He wanted to talk, but I said no. Maybe if I did, I would fall for him again, or something. I'm doing just fine, so why did he have to move here. Anyway, Reyez finally allowed me to take care of patients by myself today. It was fun, I liked it, I guess. Luckily I'm free tomorrow because I can't sleep at all now. Maybe it's the repeating thoughts of him running through my mind, or just simply the lack of melatonin in my body right now. I'll probably go to the park tomorrow, stop at the cafe first then make my way there, but anyway, I'm going to try and sleep now.

It was a quick entry, nothing special, just her major thoughts being written down, just enough for her to feel better. She got up from the bed walking over to the kitchen grabbing a water bottle before leaning against the counter and sipping it. She crossed her bare legs over each other, looking out of the big window in her living room. Her favorite part about the apartment? It was the window that looked down on bright LA city. Y/N could sit there for hours and not notice the time pass by, she knows this because it happened before. She left the kitchen and walked towards the window, propping her body down on the small couch she had in front of the window. She laid her head on her hand, watching the few cars that sped down the street, the small yet bright red lights disappearing into the distance as her eyes followed them until they could.

Her eyes softly closed as she laid down on the couch, drifting off into another universe. The next morning she woke up at around 8 AM, doing her daily routine, except she stopped at the Cafe, picked her things up, and made her way to the park. It was an old park, there was an old playground that seemed like it hadn't been used in years. She sat down on an old bench drinking her coffee as she watched the scenery.

She didn't take her notebook out, her mind not having any thoughts, or at least no thoughts relevant enough for her to write down. She just took her time to take her surroundings in. She admired how the wind moved the trees, yet they were so strong they didn't crack. The way the birds lifted off whatever surface they were, and drifted off into the sky. She admired the rare butterflies that randomly appeared just to disappear once again. She simply admired the earth, something that she didn't do quite often; Always being too deep in her thoughts to actually study the things around her.

"They're beautiful aren't they?" Grayson's voice spoke out of nowhere, making Y/N do a slight jump in her seat as her heart raced.

She brought her hand up to her chest, a sigh falling past her lips as she glared at Grayson who was chuckling, "You fucking scared me,"

"Sorry," he sighed, sitting down next to her.

They both let out sighs. Both knowing that there was no escaping the conversation that was about to happen, a conversation that was long due.

"You could, hmm, you could go first," she spoke after a few moments of silence, throat dried making her clear it in the middle of some of her words.

"I'm sorry about yesterday. You were working, and Ummm, it wasn't the right place or time to talk about things. I'm also sorry because I never gave you an explanation as to why we should've broken up. After all, you didn't ask anyway," He softly spoke. He thought every word through, studied each meaning before letting them run past his lips.

"I didn't ask because it's what you wanted. Your decision was clearly made. I mean, I don't think breaking up with someone is a spontaneous thought is it? Your decision was made, and if you felt like I was holding you back, then I had to let you go, if I loved you, then I think I did the right thing." Her words were careful too. And quiet, so quiet feeling that if she spoke too loud the things around her would break.

"I didn't want to break up. I felt like it was the right thing to do, you know? We were always so busy, and we made time for each other, but it was exhausting. And when you were out with friends, I felt like I was annoying you or something," he sighed and she shook her head, the thought of her ever getting annoyed at Grayson's presence being absurd.

"Oh God absolutely not," she chuckled, "I thought I was annoying you. Like I wondered if you talked about me, or not. I wanted to know if I annoyed you because I felt like I did,"

It was true. In her journal, multiple pages were filled out with her question herself on whether Grayson talked about her or not. Even after the breakup, she wondered if he'll ever need her. Most pages were about him, all of her thoughts revolved around him, always.

"I did. All the time, to the point where I said your name subconsciously," he smiled, remembering the conversations he had with his friends about her, and how great she was.

"I did too, well not say but write," she sighed, leaning her back on the bench.

"You wrote about me?"

"Grayson you know I did, that's a dumb question," She shook her head, taking a sip of the coffee that was somehow still warm.

"Do you still write about me?" He asked and she stayed quiet, not knowing whether she should answer truthfully or not.

"Honestly speaking, I do. I write about everything that comes to mind, so sometimes? Yeah," she sighed, knowing that it would be easier if they just told the truth.

Maybe this was the closure that they both needed, yet never got. Maybe this was going to help her fully move on from him, and have thoughts that don't include her.

Or maybe not. Maybe this would help them reconnect. Y/N left it all up to the universe. She was a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, and that you can't change your future since it's already written about. When she got home after a couple of hours she took a shower, lit on her favorite candles, and did the expected. She took out her notebook and wrote.

We spoke today. He told me the reason why we broke up. It wasn't an intentional meeting though, I was just admiring nature. I was looking at the butterflies I think. He randomly spoke. And I know it was long due and needed so I just told him to say it. It's better to just get it over with than to just keep pushing it back, I think. He told me why he wanted to break up, which right now, sounds like a valid reason. I just wonder why he didn't just say it back then. It would've saved me a lot of nights, don't you think? He now knows I write about him, and where I go to write about him. Maybe I shouldn't go there anymore. It sounds out of this world I know. But maybe, just maybe, I should just close that chapter in my life.

There are just too many memories of him at Beachwood. That's where he surprised me the first time he came to visit. And it's where I write about him the most. I could find another cafe near here, there's plenty.

I just wonder if we're ever going to see each other again. If I'll ever fall for him again, if that is even possible. Because I don't think you could fall for the same person twice, right?

That was the last page in her journal. All the pages filled with her delicate letters, her writing being eternal. Filled with on-going words until the end, where an unanswered question laid. The weight that was once on her shoulders began to fade, and for once in her life, the thought of her future no longer made her afraid.

This is the first time I’m proud of a something I wrote, so if this flops, I will deactivate! Just kidding, sort of. Anyways, yeah, I feel like my writing has improved, and as always, if you have any tips, and/or constructive critism, please, please, please drop them in my inbox, and don’t worry, I won’t say your hurting my feelings lmfao!!

Tag List: @guiltydols @evergreendolan @ydolanssss @rhyrhy462 @resilientdolan @simplyxdolxstyles @simplyxdolxstyles {If you wanna be added to my Tag List, just let me know :) lol}

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luvlyuno · 3 years

Text

alone (m)

What happens when your crush offers to let you stay a few nights but plans take a turn?

Pairing: Huening Kai & Female OC

[ft. TXT Soobin & Yeonjun, NCT Na Jaemin, ITZY Lia & Yuna]

Genre: Suspense, Little Angst, Ballet AU

Warning: Sexual Assualt, Rape, Arguing, Trust issues, Suicide

Word Count: 2.0k

Note: first post~

-------------

“And 1. And 2” The girl leaped from point one to point two. Feeling the melody of the classical song. Her dance partner lifted her body off the ground, bringing her to a full 360 degree. “Great job Sujin. Impressive like always” The instructor complimented as the team finished practice. Sujin’s face turned into a light shade of pink, quickly thanking her instructor before scurrying to her bag to pack everything up.

“Hey Sujin, Miss Park wants to speak to you in her office.” Lia, a fellow member of the ballet academy said. The girl put her phone down walking over to the office surrounded by windows. “Miss Park, you called me?” Miss Park stood up from her desk with an envelope in her hand. “Look what I found in the mail.” The elder woman handed the thick envelope to Sujin. “It’s from Saebom School of Arts.” She commented. A layer of moisture grew on Sujin’s hands. Her hands started shaking as well. “Open it when you get home.” Miss Park lightly patted the girl on the shoulder as she walked outside back into the studio.

“Why did Miss Park call you in?” Yuna, another teammate and friend of Sujin asked. “She gave me this envelope from Saebom.” Yuna’s mouth was in an ‘o’ shape. “Well, I got to go. Someone was calling you by the way. Don’t forget to text me!” Her friend yelled running out of the door of the studio. Sujin giggled a bit, walking off to her slightly open duffle bag. The girl knelt, picking up her phone from her bag. A notification from the boy that she’s head over heels flashed on the screen. “Kai Jung.” She said under her breath. The two lovers met over summer dance camp. Kai was from a different ballet studio a couple of hours away from Sujin’s. They met by being paired up for a boy and girl dance duet at camp. Later growing mutual feelings for each other. She unlocked her phone immediately by pressing on the messaging app. Sujin typed away on her phone telling Kai that she will call him when she got home from the studio. Before leaving Sujin waved goodbye to her ballet instructor and went off to catch the next bus.

“Next Stop: District 9” Sujin got up from her seat walking out of the bus. She watched as the stores along the sidewalk turned on their neon lines. Shining through the darkness of Seoul. Sujin sighed heavily as a quick shiver ran down her back. Sooner than she thought, Sujin was already home ready for dinner. “Sujin’s home!” The girl’s older brother, Jaemin said, sliding through the hallway of their house. Sujin smiled as she took her shoes off. “Mom!” She yelled from the Mudroom. “Miss Park gave me this envelope from Saebom.” She made her way to the kitchen. “She told me to open it at home.” Mrs. Na hummed in response while stirring the soup for dinner. Sujin slowly opened the thick envelope, taking the piece of paper out.

“Oh my god.” She gasped, clasping her hand to her mouth. “I got in! OMG, I GOT IN JAEMIN!” She squealed like a pig. The girl jumped in excitement, her once low bun undoing.” Jaemin hugged his sister. “Congrats sis! You got into your dream school! She nodded, smiling from ear to ear. Sujin turned to look at her Mom who had no emotion written on her face. Sujin’s smile dropped to a confused look. “Mom? What’s wrong” Her Mother looked up. “Isn’t this too much? Ballet is a hobby, not a career.” Mrs. Na questioned. “Mom, Sujin has plans ready for herself. She planned to be a professional ballerina and have a side business like what she has now.” Jaemin stuck up for his little sister. Sujin was on the verge of tears from all the arguing. “And!? What is that gonna help her in the future? I TOLD YOU TO BECOME A LAWYER-'' Mrs. Na was cut off. “BEING A LAWYER WAS YOUR DREAM NOT MINE! I CHOOSE WHAT I WANT TO BECOME IN THE FUTURE NOT YOU!”

Sujin then stormed off to her bedroom. Tears streaming down her face. Jaemin’s eyes following hers. “Wow, Mom. The time when you’re supposed to be a ‘supportive mother figure’ has gone to waste.” Jaemin ran after Sujin leaving their Mother dumbfounded. Sujin sat on her bed as she cried rivers. A sudden knock was heard. She didn’t feel like opening it, so she ignored the knocking. “Sujin it’s me Jaemin. Can I come in?” She stayed silent. “I’ll just take that as a yes.” Jaemin walked in taking a seat next to her.

“Why can’t Mom just understand that this is what I want for me in the future? What did I do for her to act like this? I don’t want to be under the same roof as her right now” Sujin complained as tears spilled out more. Jaemin sighed. “I honestly don’t know how to respond to this but I support you. Dad would support you too.” He smiled trying to brighten the mood. Sujin’s lips curled a little making Jaemin feel a little satisfied. “I’ll give you some alone time. I know you’ll probably trap yourself in here till she apologies, so text or call me if you need anything.” Then he left, leaving Sujin giggling a bit. Her phone started ringing all of a sudden.

Her phone lit up with the contact name Kai <3 on it. “Hello? Kai?” Her voice was raspy from all the crying. “Hi, Sujin! A-are you okay? You sound sick.” Sujin softly giggled at how Kai was worried for her. “I just got into an argument with my Mom. I don’t want to be here right now.” She pouted. “Wanna stay the weekend at my Grandma’s house with me? She lives near you. Same town.” Kai offered. He was planning to surprise her but plans took a turn. “Oh please, you’re a lifesaver Kai!” She smiled through the phone. “I’ll pick you up tomorrow afternoon. Around 4 pm.” Kai happily said. The two eventually hung up. Sujin laid down bored out of her mind. Until Jaemin barged into her room.

“Well, dinner was super awkward. Mom was just ranting to Dad the whole time but bro was like I support her.” Sujin puffed out a little chuckle. “Did you just call Dad bro?” Jaemin just shrugged then left her room. The next morning everything was so strange to Sujin. Maybe it was the fact that her Mom didn’t open her windows while she was sleeping. Or that breakfast wasn’t pre-made for Jaemin and her. Sujin rose packing her bags getting ready to stay at Kai’s Grandma’s house for a few days. She has informed Jaemin that she was going to sleep over at her friend Yuna’s place for a couple of days. Her phone buzzed on the nightstand. Kai texted.

“I won’t be able to pick you up. I hate to help my Grandma cook, so my cousins Soobin and Yeonjun will pick you if that’s okay?” Sujin replied with a quick okay then continued her packing. It was a little over 4 pm when Kai’s cousins Yeonjun and Soobin arrived to pick her up. “How did you and Kai meet? He’s never really had a girlfriend.” Yeonjun commented. Sujin was shocked at the assumption of the two dancers dating. “Oh u-um, we’re not dating. We’re just friends nothing more.” She blushed at the thought. “Hmm.” Soobin replied. The drive there was quite longer than she thought. That’s until Soobin offered to give her something.

“Hey Sujin, we just came from the store before picking up. Want some of these candies we bought?” It would be rude to decline so Sujin agreed. After a few sour gummies, she started to feel dizzy. Then everything went black. Sujin woke up in an unfamiliar room with a locked door and a glued shut window. What in the world happened? Dark thoughts polluted her brain.

“Oh! You’re awake.” In came Soobin but no sight of Yeonjun. “Where’s Kai? Are we here already?” She cluelessly asked not even noticing the object in the male’s hand. Soobin got closer to Sujin, inches away from her face. She was caught off guard. His eyes piercing through her soul. “G-get away from me!” She stuttered pushing him away. A smirk grew on his face. “I’m not gonna do anything to you.” She raised an eyebrow feeling the uneasy energy in the room. “How am I supposed to trust you?” Sujin slowly walked backward. Soobin follows as she moves. “I promise.” Soobin injected her with some type of liquid in her right arm in just a blink of an eye. To Sujin the room started spinning. She felt weak but a sudden burst of unusual energy burst. Soobin’s lip curled as he watched transform into a different state of mind.

“Yeonjun come in here.” The pink-haired boy Yeonjun walked into the room, eyes widening at the scene. Sujin wasn’t acting normal. “C’mon you go first.” Soobin pushed Yeonjun closer to Sujin who was laying on the white mattress. “This is wrong I’m opting out dude.” Soobin chuckled at the scared Yeonjun. “Oh is little Yeonjun scared to do something very bad to this little girl?” Soobin laughed again pushing Yeonjun’s shoulder. “Do it or I’m telling the student body that you’re selling you know what. And that would for sure get you expelled from going to your dream school.” The boy walked closer to Yeonjun who was awfully terrified. Just the threat alone could make Yeonjun do it with hesitation. He knew it was bad but still did what he was told. “Thanks for starting now, let me finish her.”

Soobin said without any emotions. Yeonjun stepped aside as he watched the screaming girl whine and cry. It was so hard for him not to call for help. Yes, he felt guilty for Sujin but reputation goes first in this cruel world. Sujin screamed and screamed for help. The immense pain Sujin didn’t sign up for was never-ending. As much as she tried to fight back or force Soobin to stop he would either reply by slapping her or making the pain worse. “Please Stop.” She whispered weakly. Sujin laid there lifeless.

“Hurry and get back in the car.” Soobin groaned leaving the room. Sujin wept to realize what just happened. She never thought that her first would be a crime. She hurriedly put on her clothes and walked out of the mysterious house. Soobin saw as she sulked all the way out of the house. He didn’t have the patience for this so he picked her up shoving her into the car. The night ride to nowhere was quiet. Besides the silent sobs and choked-up breathing that was coming from Sujin, there wasn’t a single word spoken.

“Get out.” The car came to a stop. Sujin looked up making eye contact with Soobin through the rearview mirror. “I said GET. OUT.” He repeated through his teeth. “Y-you were supposed to bring me to Kai..” She dragged her words. Soobin huffed. “I said get out!” He repeated once again annoyed. His sudden shout made Yeonjun and Sujin flinch. Sujin got out of the car grabbing her belongings. Just as she closes the door, Sujin gets a quick glance at Yeonjun. His facial expression filled with guilt. Seconds later the car left faster than light. Sujin stood there feeling the moonlight shine on her. She was left in the middle of a highway in Seoul. Sujin felt so dirty and disappointed in herself. All the times she tried to stop a car to get home they would just give her a dirty look.

“I could’ve stopped him.” She thought. Just within two days, her life went downhill. She quickly took out her phone typing a quick “I love you, Jaemin.” to her brother. “Doesn’t that bright light seem interesting?” Sujin asked herself. She stepped off the sidewalk. Her feet leading straight to her fate. The sound of honking did not faze her. The bright lights didn’t even make her squint. Sujin Na just kept walking to the middle of the road. Till she wanted to stop.

BREAKING NEWS: 18 YEAR OLD SUJIN NA REPORTED DEAD AT HWY NEO127. CT SCANS FOUND SHE WAS BRUTALLY RAPED BEFORE HER DEATH. CCTV SPOTTED THE TWO PERPETRATORS, SOOBIN CHOI AND YEONJUN CHOI. MORE INFORMATION WILL BE ANNOUNCED...

Jaemin’s shaky eyes rewind again and again. It’s been two years since her suicide. Her soul still lingers on Highway Neo 127.

Sujin Na.

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fantastic-bby · 3 years

Text

ATEEZ vs. college

Pairing: -

Genre: Headcanon

Word count: 1.7k

Warnings: Swearing

Masterlist

Hongjoong

Fine arts major with performing arts minor

Has a slightly scuffed sleep schedule but it’s decent

But has a routine that he follows most of the time

Always on time for class and pays attention like his life depends on it

Gets teased by Mingi a lot

Shares an apartment with Seonghwa

Covered the apartment in cute DIYs bcs he wants to make the place more homely

Spends his money on artisan coffee at the overpriced café on campus

Teacher’s assistant

He’s very patient when it comes to tutoring students

President of the performing arts club and is usually the director for plays bcs the professor in charge trusts him a lot

Usually sticks to traditional scripts but likes to go a little bit more original whenever he feels like it

Uses the same tote bag everyday (one he made himself)

Dresses in whatever he’s made himself because he thinks they’re cute and he wants everyone to see his creations

Has to wake the others up for class he complains that it’s annoying but he still does it even though no one asks him to

Practically lives in the fine arts building bcs he’s there all the damn time until he has to go home

Finishes his assignments on time

“Hwa, is this cute?”

“Okay”

“That’s not an answer, asshole”

Seonghwa

Language and literature major

Is the only one with a good sleep schedule

Has a routine he sticks to

Never late to classes but zones out sometimes when he’s really bored

Has to wake Hongjoong up whenever he pulls all nighters studying for tests

Works at the library because it’s quiet and he moves around a lot which gives him a lot of alone time

Has to kick Yunho out a lot

Drinks expensive artisan coffee with Joong

Part of the nature club and has plants all over the apartment bcs he thinks they light up the place

Everyday is a different bag and all of them are super stylish and also seem to hold everything

Has to bring around things like tissues, bandaids, water bottles bcs he cares for his friends

Dresses well all the time even if he wakes up late

Part of the campus heartthrob line

The entire campus fawns over him even the single professors

Spends most of his time reading books wherever he’s comfortable usually the park or whatever bench is the most calming

Finishes his assignments early and submits them early

“But hyuuuuuung”

“Yunho, if you don’t get your loud ass out of here—”

Yunho

Nutrition major with a dance minor

Does not have a fixed sleep schedule, he sleeps whenever he pleases

His routine is nonexistent

He does whatever he wants whenever he wants but actually isn’t that reckless

He just doesn’t really have a routine

Late to class and also doesn’t seem to be paying attention because he’s preoccupied with a funny meme that Mingi sent him

Is usually the first to be awoken by Joong and always waits for his hyung to hang up because he doesn’t want to accidentally cut him off mid-sentence

Shares an apartment with Mingi

Drinks convenience store coffee

Sometimes he visits the library just to tease Hwa usually gets kicked out by said man because he’s being loud

Works part time at a bakery where the owner hired him because she thought he was really sweet

President of the swimming club

Has one bag for everyday use and it’s the same black backpack with random pins on it

Wears cute fuzzy sweaters when it’s not hot and wears plain t shirts when it’s too hot for sweaters

Spends his time at the swimming pool with Mingi

Finishes his assignments right before the deadline

“Yunho, darling, how long have the muffins been in the oven?”

“Uhm…”

Yeosang

Computer science major

Does not give a single flying fuck

Sleeps whenever he wants

Does whatever he wants

No one ever sees him in class but he still gets good grades

Drinks at least 4 cups of cheap coffee everyday which makes everyone wonder how his heart is still alive

Even though he sleeps at any time, he always wakes up on time and never answers Hongjoong’s morning calls because he thinks it’s funny

Shares an apartment with Wooyoung

He has a job but no one knows what it is because he’s never told anyone they just know it’s something he does online

Usually has to wake Wooyoung up

He just walks into his room and repeatedly calls his name until he wakes up leaves if Woo doesn’t wake up at all

Uses a simple black backpack with nothing on it

No one on campus really knows anything about him because he strictly sticks to his circle of friends and no one ever sees him on campus unless he’s at club events or meetings

President of the robotics club

Spends all of his time in his room when he’s not on campus

Dresses in smart casual outfits (blazers, slacks, sneakers, t shirts)

Is never seen doing his assignments but he still manages to finish them on time

“Woo, look this robot I made”

“Holy shit, that’s so cool!”

“Be careful with it!”

San

Majors in dance

Also kinda doesn’t give a fuck

Shares an apartment with Jongho

Has the most fucked up sleep schedule

He sleeps at like 7 pm right after classes and wakes up at 3 am (like his brain is programmed on another time zone)

Picks up Joong’s morning call whenever he feels like it

Comes to class on the dot but sometimes just doesn’t show up at all

President of the dance club

Drinks whatever coffee he can get his hands on

Spends most of his time in the public dance studio and sometimes rents the private rooms because he wants alone time

Dresses in t shirts and sweats because he wants to be comfy

Is part of the campus heartthrob line

The girls, the gays and the theys are in love with him and love watching him dance

Volunteers at the local pet shelter because he wants to spend time with the cats

Likes to go to invite himself into WooSang’s apartment where he bothers Yeosang who pretends he’s not there because he couldn’t care less

Doesn’t have a bag

He manhandles his laptop all over the place because he really doesn’t care that much his laptop is a beast tho it handles all the shit San puts it through

Finishes his assignments whenever he wants

“San, you should be nicer to your laptop”

“It’s fineeee”

Mingi

Medicine major

Doesn’t ever seem to sleep

Like ever

Disappears and reappears out of nowhere most of the time

Whenever he disappears, no one really knows where he is and he never picks up calls everyone thinks he’s finally sleeping

Because he’s always awake, Yunho always comes into his room to see Mingi either vibing or literally doing anything but sleep

Comes to class but is always doing something else

Prefers tea over coffee

Always picks up Joong’s morning calls and greets him really loudly just to bully him

Part of the swimming club with Yunho

Works part time at the music studio because he likes being able to use the studios when there’s no bookings

Barely has to try to get good grades bcs his brain is so sexy big

Always filled with energy

Is also really strong and quite unaware of his strength

Dresses in v casual baggy clothes and always looks really comfortable

Uses his height to tease Joong and holds his coffee above his head

Playfully wrestles Jongho regularly

Has a cute orange messenger bag that he uses all the time

Finishes his assignments minutes before the deadline

“Whoever holds their breath the longest wins”

“Mingi, we’re not five”

“I don’t care, Yun. It’s fucking fun”

Wooyoung

Culinary major

Is always asleep

Bothers Yeosang during the day

Has a very relaxed routine that he somewhat sticks to

Likes to break into Yeo’s room to bother him but usually gets a book thrown at him

Wakes up to Joong’s morning call but likes to go back to sleep afterwards

Always in class but no one knows whether or not he’s paying attention

The neighbours know when he’s laughing but he doesn’t care because he’s happy

Works part time at a café

Refuses to give discounts to any of his friends because he tells them he won’t get money that way except for Yeosang bcs he has a soft spot for his best friend

Vice president of the dance club

Dresses in casual layers (t shirts, loose button ups, jeans, sneakers)

Part of the hearthrob line

The girls, the gays and the theys love his laugh

Likes to drag San out of his apartment to do anything

Has a cute pastel backpack that he takes a lot of care of bcs he loves it

Spends most of his time in the culinary building bcs he wants to learn new recipes so that he can cook for his friends

Does his assignments last minute and has missed the deadline a couple of times

“Yeosang, try this”

“Mmm, can I spit it out?”

“You fucking—”

Jongho

Sports major with a vocal minor

Also has a decent sleep schedule

Drinks only coffee and protein

Doesn’t have a routine unless it involves him going to the gym

Early to class and pays attention most of the time

Wakes up on time so he answers Joong’s morning call just to say hi to both of his hyungs

Works as a personal trainer at the on-campus gym because he likes helping people work out

Asks San to sit on his back while he does push ups at home

The two of them are always working out together

President of the wrestling club and the entire campus absolutely fears him

Always wins wrestles against Mingi but only because he knows more technique Mingi thinks it’s not fair

His love language is aggression

Likes to playfully bully his friends to the point where even they’re slightly scared of him

Dresses casually

Has a dark blue backpack that he’s had for years and is in need of a replacement

Spends most of his time at the gym or just working out in general if he’s not practicing singing

Finishes his assignments a day before the deadline

“Make sure you’re not using your back when you’re lifting things”

“Dude, I don’t even know what muscles I use when I walk”

“You’ll figure it out”

111 notes · View notes

seaweedbrain404 · 3 years

Text

Wolfstar Au! : We Can’t Let the Kid Down, Now Can We?

read it on ao3

The flight from London to Athens wasn’t worth it and the flight back was even less worth it. Remus cursed himself for being so silly to think that Teddy’s mother would want anything to do with the boy, and even sillier to believe her when she said she would love for them to visit but couldn’t leave Athens because of work related reasons.

Remus should’ve asked her to elaborate these “reasons” but he didn’t and so, he and Teddy got to Athens for the weekend, she spent about an hour with them before leaving to go to a party. They didn’t see her again until three hours before they had to leave for the airport. He regretted this whole thing. Everything that happened to Remus up until that point, he regretted. Well, that was a lie. It wasn’t fair to Teddy. Remus didn’t regret Teddy. Sure, he hadn’t planned on becoming a father at 20 while in college but shit happens and Teddy was a wonderful kid (most of the time).

Understandably, Remus was annoyed and Teddy was upset. Everything was fine though, Remus had given him the window seat while he took the middle and hoped whichever fucker got landed with the aisle wasn’t an asshole because Teddy was at the age where he peed a lot. Like all the time and drank so much juice, which was probably the cause.

Remus had given Teddy a picture book for the trip. He already started making up his own story about what was happening to each character in each picture with alarmingly detailed backstories and of course, telling Remus every single bit of it when a man took the aisle seat.

“.....but Sammy doesn’t like her because she took the last cookie…..” Teddy went on, not noticing that Remus’ attention was elsewhere.

The man who sat down next to him was downright gorgeous. His dark hair was tied back in a loose bun with a pair of sunglasses resting atop his head. He was sporting a nice tan and wore clothes that looked more expensive than anything Remus could ever hope to own in his entire life. His cheekbones were sharp, almost royal looking. It made Remus feel slightly self conscious about his own sunburnt nose, freckled skin, limbs that didn’t quite fit and t-shirt that was so old and probably dirty because Teddy always had to wipe his hands on him.

That’s when it all went downhill. Teddy didn’t appreciate the takeoff the first time around and he sure as hell didn’t appreciate it now. The 4-year-old started crying as soon as the plane began moving.

Everyone seemed to look for the source of the noise and when their eyes landed on Remus and his son, they sighed or rolled their eyes or looked pitifully at the pair. With sudden horror, as he put his arm around Teddy to try to comfort him until they were safely allowed to undo their seatbelts so he could put him on his lap, Remus realised he was the annoyed guy with the wailing kid on the plane. The enchanting mam next to him, was unlucky enough to be seated next to that guy.

He felt a deep rise of panic and shame in his belly. “Shhh… Teds, it’s okay, we’ll be flying properly soon” he tried to push his own feelings aside in order to comfort Teddy.

It wasn’t working. Teddy kept crying and the handsome stranger had plugged earphones in his ears. Good, Remus thought, at least now it’s one less person to see me fail at being a father.

“Too loud!” Teddy cried, covering his ears with his hands then taking Remus’ hands and covering his ears with those.

He continued crying and this would continue to stress Remus out until they were high enough and stable enough that the seatbelt light flashed off. When they eventually did, and Remus was sure there would be no turbulence, he undid Teddy’s belt and brought him up onto his lap.

It was almost comically funny how Teddy stopped crying immediately. The moment he made contact with Remus, head tucked into his dad’s chest, he was reduced to sniffles.

“Why don’t you go night-night for a mo’ yeah?” Remus asked softly, as he rubbed circles on Teddy’s back.

The 4-year-old sniffled and looked up at Remus with great big watery eyes. “Daddy? Can we go to nana and granda’s when we go home?”

“Of course we can” Remus whispered into his son’s hair.

“That lady- you said was mummy, I don’t think she wants to be my mummy”

Remus had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from crying too. Teddy was only 4 but ever so perceptive and Remus regretted more than ever trusting Teddy’s mother.

“But it’s ‘kay, I gots you daddy” Teddy carried on, wiping his nose on Remus’ tshirt and giggling to himself. “You have my buggers on you now”

“Go to sleep now Teds, yeah?”

Teddy nodded, pushing his head further into Remus’ chest. His small hands were clinging tightly onto his father, as if he was afraid to let go. Remus was also holding onto Teddy for dear life. He was, without a doubt, the best thing to ever happen to Remus.

Clearly just as exhausted as Teddy, Remus closed his eyes for about five seconds before he felt someone tapping his shoulder. He jolted awake, feeling the heavy lump on his lap move slightly before he registered his surroundings.

It was the man from earlier. He had been the one to wake up Remus and by the looks of it, Teddy had been awake from quite some time. It took Remus a moment to realised the man had said something, his brain still swirling with sleep.

“Sorry- what?” He managed dumbly.

The man just smiled. “I said, your kid needs the bathroom” he pointed to Teddy, who looked decidedly more cheerful now that he had slept a bit.

“Oh- right, thanks- thank you” Remus’ eyes went from Teddy back to man. He smiled sheepishly as the other got up to leave Remus and Teddy out.

After returning from the bathroom trip, Teddy still didn’t want to be seated alone and remained firmly attached to Remus. Currently, he was sitting on his lap with a colouring book and a six-pack of crayons to keep him entertained.

“I’m sorry if he gave you any trouble” Remus said suddenly, after coming to the realization that Teddy had probably woken up and started bothering the other man.

He just shook his head, letting out a chuckle. “No, don’t worry about it, I’ve got a niece and a godson so I’m pretty used to kids”

“Still, he can be a bit much, he likes dinosaurs so I hope he didn’t talk your ear off”

“What? No, he really is a brilliant kid” He smiled warmly, then looked thoughtful for a moment before saying, “I’m Sirius, by the way”

“Remus”

“I know, kid kinda sold ya out”

Of course. Trust Teddy to sell you out to people who you think look ridiculously handsome and that you definitely wouldn’t mind snogging.

“Oh god” Remus dragged his hand over his face, I’m scared to ask what else he said”

“Nothing bad, I promise but…” Sirius pursed his lips then spoke in a lower voice, “I hope you don’t mind me asking- I mean it’s just cause of what he said but why were you in Greece?”

Remus’ shoulders tensed, readying himself for a fight. He had to remind himself he wasn’t 17 anymore, he wasn’t just a queer schoolboy from a small town in Wales with nothing to lose. He was a dad now.

“We went to visit Teddy’s mum” came his soft reply and he continued despite himself, “it wasn’t a good idea though”

“Why not?”

“Yeah, I don’t really want to talk about it… it’s complicated”

“Oh” Sirius looked a little crestfallen, he shook his head and his smile reappeared. “Are you Wesh?”

Taken aback the the question, Remus blinked at Sirius and nodded. He almost got whiplash from how fast Sirius changed the topic.

“Mm, figured”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Your accent” Sirius said, as if that explained everything but upon seeing the look on Remus’ face, he elaborated. “My parents had a sort of holiday home there, they’re filthy rich- my parents, too bad they disowned me for liking men”

Maybe it was the way Sirius said it, with such lightness that made Remus’ head spin. Or maybe it was that he would’ve never been able to joke around about his own troubles or even so casually say it in conversation. He kind of admired Sirius for it, it must take a lot of bravely to be this open about something like that in front of a random guy you’ve met on the plane.

“Oh- I’m sorry about that, that your parents did that” Remus managed once he recovered from his initial shock. “It’s an awful thing to do”

Sirius just shrugged, flashing another smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes like the previous ones. “Eh, it’s all good, all in the past y’know”

Remus opened his mouth but before he could speak, Teddy piped up. “Daddy, I like Sirius, I think you and him should hold hands and kiss”

Obviously Teddy is going to come out with something as embarrassing as that. Remus felt his entire face flush red as he tried to scramble for some way to apologize when Sirius held up his hand to stop him.

“No, I should probably take your daddy out on a date before we do that Teddy” Sirius said in a tone so serious, one might’ve thought he wasn’t joking. “What do you say bud? Am I allowed?”

Teddy nodded his head vigorously. “Yes! but we have to go to nana and granda’s first, then you can take him on a date”

Sirius aimed yet another smile at Remus, “What do you say? We can’t let the kid down now, can we?”

“Yeah, ‘suppose we can’t” He replied breathlessly.

A lot of things went through Remus’ head at that moment and for the rest of the flight. He mulled over whether he had made the right decision or not but when he saw Teddy chatting away happily to Sirius, he figured it was worth a shot.

#marauders #remus lupin #sirius black #teddy lupin #the marauders #modern mauraders #marauders au #marauders fandom #wolfstar fanfiction #wolfstar fic #wolfstar #wolfstar fluff

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writingblackpink · 3 years

Text

If You Leave Now, You Lose Everything (pt. 4)

read pt. 1, pt. 2, pt. 3

genre: some angst and some fluff :)

word count: 2.3k

pairing: jennie x reader

You and Jennie have been together for two years now. While the relationship has been rocky as of recently, will you find a way to make it work before it’s too late?

A/N: FINALLY! The final chapter! Sorry it’s taken me so long, but it’s here now! Thanks for reading. As always, let me know what you thought of this series!

You drove home quickly, trying not to break down until you made it into the safety of your own home. Your mind raced with thoughts of what you just saw. Of course she’s moved on! She broke up with YOU. Tears threatened to spill out at the thought. You couldn’t focus on anything else besides making it home.

Maybe if you were paying more attention, you would have noticed the strange car that had been following you the whole time. You would have noticed the heavy steps against the pavement trailing you in the parking lot. You would have heard the quiet breathing on the other side of the door as you slid down with your back against it, letting out quiet sobs. You would have known Jennie was listening from the outside. She was there.

About five minutes passed like this before you heard a gentle knock against the door, sounding like it was coming from your level, like whoever was knocking was crouched against the door as well. You didn’t respond but you began to hear a familiar voice talk to you; quiet, gentle.

“Y/N?” She asked, barely audible to you. “I know you’re in there. Please open the door.” It was quiet in the room, but your thoughts had never been so loud. You began going through every scenario until you had enough and pushed everything away. Now left with the silence and only the door separating you from Jennie, no longer thousands of miles between, you didn’t want to miss the chance to have at least one more conversation with her to tell her how you felt.

You stood up, and before your fingers could unlatch the locks, you heard her let out a loud sigh before speaking up again.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, for everything, really.” Her breath was shaky and you knew tears were welling in her eyes. “I never should have left like I did. Please, just, open the door so we can talk about it.”

As soon as she stopped talking, you opened the door to reveal Jennie, crouched on the floor and looking up at you. Wordlessly, you stepped aside as you opened the door wider, signaling it was okay for her to come in. She got up and brushed off her jacket before walking past you, eyes trained to the floor. Realizing that she’d never been here before, she didn’t know this place, she waited for your direction on what to do next.

“Why are you here, Jennie.” Your voice had never sounded so cold, emotionless, and you made sure your eyes were focused on a spot over her shoulder, too afraid that seeing what she was feeling would break you down too.

You could see her turn to look at you in confusion, hurt.

“W-what?”

“I said, why are you here, Jennie? Weren’t you the one who said this would never work? Why waste a trip? Don’t you have your girlfriend to get back to?”

Your eyes moved to meet hers and it hurt you how hurt she looked. You were hoping that she felt as betrayed as you did in this moment.

“Excuse me? Girlfriend?” She pushed out, offended. “First of all, you came to me first, Y/N. Secondly, I don’t know what you think you saw or heard or whatever but the only girlfriend I hope you’re referring to is you,” she lowered her voice, sounding more hurt than before, “how could you think I could move on so quickly?”

You didn’t answer, instead stared blankly back at her. She didn’t really give you much time to respond before she was continuing, everything she was feeling over the last few weeks spilling out into the room, unfiltered.

“God, Y/N, leaving you that day was the worst decision of my life. I made a promise to you-we made a promise to each other, and I broke that, and I am so immensely sorry. I wouldn’t blame you if you never trusted me again.” She paused as her breath started to come in shaky, and you could tell she was trying to compose herself and her thoughts so she could get out everything she’s been wanting to say to you. “Ever since I left New York, everything has been a blur. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t even think of anything that doesn’t have to do with you. I thought that the distance would help, but it just made me feel so much more broken knowing you wouldn’t be coming back around. You know, I even almost answered your calls, but I was too much of a coward to actually do it. I was too scared of what you would say on the other end of the line. I was missing a piece of me, and that piece was you. It’s always been you.”

She surged forward, taking your hands in hers, tears now flowing freely down her face as she looked up at you. You took a deep breath, trying as hard as you could to not fall apart, to stay strong for both of you.

“I transferred back to Korea.” Was all you responded with, and you were hitting yourself internally for that being the only sentence your brain could come up with right now.

“What are you talking about?” Jennie asked as she sniffled away some tears, others falling onto the floor beneath you.

“I transferred back to the firm’s branch here. I felt the same way since you left. I could barely function. I’ve never been dependent on another person, but my life without you in it, without hearing your voice or seeing your face every day, it just felt empty. Everything felt so wrong. So I transferred back here because I wanted to give it one last shot. I couldn’t bear to accept things as we left them, but it looks like you’ve already-”

“Y/N, stop. You’ve got it all wrong.” And for the first time that night she smiled at you. She looked absolutely wrecked, but her smile made everything in the world feel right again.

“That girl in my apartment, she’s just a childhood friend from New Zealand. She hasn’t visited in over five years so you never met her, but I promise you there is absolutely nothing between us. I only want you. I told you I’ve only ever wanted you. You’re it for me, Y/N.”

Hearing her say those words made you immediately wrap yourself into her in the tightest hug imaginable. You nuzzled your head into her neck as she held you silently for several long moments.

“Stay with me tonight?” It came out muffled into her neck, but she heard you clear as day.

“I’ll stay,” she replied just above a whisper, softly into where her head leaned against yours. “I just have to make a call to my friend and let her know I won’t be back if that’s okay.”

You gave her a nod as you pulled back, “I’ll go get you something to change into.”

Making your way into your closet, you spotted the box labeled “JENNIE’S THINGS” where it sat on a shelf above you. You took it down, ripping the tape off and rummaging through it before you found what you were looking for. It was one of your old sweatshirts that Jennie used to wear so often, you dubbed it hers, hence how it ended up in a box of her things. You placed it on the bed, and went to go get changed yourself.

You walked out of your closet as she pulled the sweatshirt over her head, moving to the opposite side of the bed and sitting down, looking over your shoulder to ask if she needed anything else before settling under the covers. If she noticed what the sweatshirt was, she didn’t mention it. The tension was still thick, so much left unsaid between you. You felt suffocated by everything you wanted to say to her, and you weren’t sure what to get out first, so you said nothing, and she said nothing. You turned your back to her and when you felt her slide in on the other side of the bed, you reached up and clicked the lamp off on your bedside table as she did the same.

You were so close to each other, no more than a foot separating you, but you still felt like she was worlds away. This didn’t feel warm like it used to, falling asleep wrapped up in each other. This was different. You were facing opposite directions. It felt cold.

Your eyes stayed open in the darkness, and you saw the first snowflakes drop onto your window sill directly across from where you lay. The first snow of the season. There was some serenity in the snowfall. There was no breeze, just frozen flakes floating down from the sky before silently hitting the ground. The room was so quiet that if you listened close enough, you could hear each snowflake landing against your window. This served as an escape from your thoughts, no longer thinking about how to mend your future with Jennie, but focused on counting each snowflake as it fell from the sky, hoping it would help lull you to sleep.

The clock on your nightstand read 2 am, and you weren’t sure how long you had been watching it snow, but you could now see that it had started to build up on the ledge outside your window. You were pulled away when you felt Jennie tossing and turning, unable to find comfort in your bed.

Your body stiffened when she shuffled in closer to you, wrapping her arms around you as she spooned you from behind.

“Y/N? Are you awake? I can’t sleep.” You made sure to keep your breathing even as she waited for a response. You were curious to hear what else she had to say.

“I love you, Y/N. I hope you know that.” She punctuated that with a soft press of her lips to your shoulder before giving you a gentle squeeze. She went quiet again for a while, and you thought she had fallen asleep until she spoke again.

“We’re...um...we’re going to be okay, right?” At that, you turned in her arms, now facing her. You could tell her expression was worried, and you wanted nothing more than to take any of her doubts away. You took a hand and brushed the hair away from her face, placing a soft kiss on her cheek.

“Yeah, Jennie, I think we’re going to be alright.”

As soon as you said that, she looked over your shoulder and caught a glimpse of what was happening outside.

“Oh my god, it’s snowing? Y/N, we have to go outside!” She exclaimed louder than she needed to, given the small space between you. She shot up quickly, flipping on the lamp as she began rummaging around, putting on more appropriate clothing to go outside in. The earlier awkwardness seemed to have dissolved.

“What are you doing? Come on, get up! It’s the first snow of the season. We have to go outside!”

You followed her lead, throwing on some sweats and getting lost in the way she was so giddy over such an ordinary occurrence. Something you had come to love about her over the last few years. You grabbed her hand as she led you through your apartment and out to the front of the building, only letting go when you made it outside. You watched as she ran and jumped and you walked behind, laughing at how she could make you feel so childlike in this moment. You spent some time just admiring the untouched snow. It was almost as if you could see each individual snowflake shimmering under the streetlights. It was fresh, the air smelling crisp and clean. You couldn’t help but think that it was symbolic of how it felt to be with Jennie right now; shimmering and new. A second chance. A fresh start.

Jennie brought you out of your thoughts as she jumped into you, giving you no time to react as you both fell back onto the ground, only the small layer of fluff breaking your fall. You both were laughing heartily.

“Are you okay, baby?” She got out in between laughing fits, and you realized you were more than okay. You wanted this forever. Jennie’s laughter was addicting, and you didn’t want to go another day without hearing it. It was a culmination of all of the little things you loved about her from the last two years rushing back at you all at once that overwhelmed every one of your senses. Your brain was clouded with everything that was Jennie. You might’ve also hit your head on the ground, but you didn’t want to think about that right now.

“Marry me.”

The laughter died down as Jennie’s eyes came back to focus on yours, looking for an explanation.

“W-what?”

“Marry me, Jennie,” the way she was looking at you made your confidence waver a bit so you continued, “I mean, well, not right this second obviously, and I don’t have a ring or anything yet, and this isn’t even how I planned to ask, but one day, I mean some day, will you–”

She cut your rambling off by pressing her lips to yours in a long, slow kiss.

“Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Yes, I’ll marry you. Some day. One day. Whenever. I’ll marry you.”

Making your way to bed much later, you waited until you heard Jennie’s breathing deepen before letting yourself doze off. You knew there was still much to talk about in the morning, but for now the only thoughts running through your mind were that you were happy. That Jennie was happy. You were happy you didn’t lose everything after all. You didn’t even lose anything, really.

#sorry I keep dropping these at weird times I'm most productive after midnight #blackpink #blackpink writing #ifyl yle #blackpink scenarios #gg scenarios #gg writing #kpop fanfic #kpop writing #blackpink jennie #jennie kim #jennie x female reader #blackpink jennie x female reader #blackpink imagines #gg imagines #jnk #angst #fluff

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anastasiyaigorevnadobrodevskaya · 3 years

Text

Kuka pelkää pimeää? - Kaapo Kakko

A/N: I hope you will enjoy the reading as much as I enjoyed the writing. A big thank you goes to everyone who has supported me. Here on tumblr I’d like to thank @nhlandotherimagines personally. Thank you Jessie.

Kuka pelkää pimeää? - Who is afraid of the dark?

The song mentioned.

Word count: 1764

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Having a relationship with a hockey player can get hard at times. It can get even worse if both sides of the relationship are working for a professional hockey team. Boy, can it get even worse if those teams happen to be the division rivals in the NHL.

The whole situation was tense as it was before the corona decided to lock me up with my boyfriend at our shared apartment in New York. Between his crazy schedule and mine, just as chaotic one, it is very difficult to find some peaceful time for one another.

Having just returned from a roadie, which was successful taking 4 out of 6 points, I close the door behind me as quietly as possible. It’s already late and Kaapo leaves for a couple of away games of his own tomorrow morning. Which doesn’t give us much time to spend together, but at least we can sleep in the same bed for once.

I change sleepily and get ready for bed trying to not make too much noise. After dragging myself out of the bathroom I slip under the covers right next to the sleeping body of my boyfriend. He stirs in his sleep, slowly turning around so he is facing me.

“Hei. How was your flight?“ His soft mumbling is barely audible and his hands reach out wrapping around my waist. His fingers slipping under the fabric of my T-shirt.

“It was okay. Guys were pain in the ass as usual.“ I laugh nuzzling my head into his chest rumbling with laughter. “But I am damn tired.“ I add a yawn for demonstration.

A chuckle leaves his pretty lips as his big hands caress my bare back. “Then sleep.” He advises, voice laced with sleep I unintentionally woke him from. I hum in response closing my eyes. I relax into the soft mattress listening to the even breathing of my beloved one.

Lying in bed I try to drift off to dream, but fail terribly. Again. Decided I’ve had enough I reach for my phone and turn it back on. Throwing the covers off of me I sit up and rub my face, annoyed at my inability to fall asleep despite being tired. I reach for my wireless headphones and put them on pairing them with my phone. I put on a rather calming playlist and click on the flashlight icon.

Tiptoeingly I leave the room making sure to close the door behind me and head for the living room. I turn on the light hanging above the kitchen island and grab a glass filling it with water to the very brim. I chug down almost half of its content and set the rest on the marble surface.

I walk over to an armchair and push it to the floor to ceiling window. I stop and cringe slightly when it makes a disturbing noise. I throw myself on it with a heavy sigh escaping my lips. Closing my eyes I take a deep breath. I focus on the music reaching my ears. The gentle tones infecting my brain trying to get it to loosen up.

I open my eyes taking a look at the city below. It never sleeps. No matter the crazy hour there’s always someone driving the busy roads. It’s as if the dark sky was outstretching its arms and reaching for people in an attempt to put them to sleep. Humans, ever the persistent creatures, are escaping its hold with cars lighting up the roads and apartments with yellow light seeping through the glass and blinds.

I hate the dark. In fact it terrifies me. I bring my knees under my chin and hug my legs close to my body. The unknown danger hiding in the shadows scares me. I no longer check under my bed for monsters. I don’t need to. They are in the streets, we meet them daily, although we don’t realize. But walking home alone in the dark makes my blood run cold at times. I can’t stand it, no matter how old I am.

Finnish songs from my playlist come up and I smile. They always remind me of Kaapo. An instant mood lifter. One song catches my attention. Kuka pelkää pimeää from Herrat. How fitting, eh? It's about two people being the only ones wide awake at a late night hour. The sleeping city and stars shining above it, but them not being afraid of the dark. I wish. I think bitterly.

I sing along quietly, imagining driving around the city with Kaapo. With no destination in mind, just driving. Probably listening to our favorite songs and messing up the lyrics, especially me making up new Finnish words and him laughing at and with me. He rarely smiles, but when he does it’s so worth it. He saves it for the good moments. With him I would drive even at the darkest of the nights.

A happy sigh escapes my lips as another of the songs I keep deep within my heart comes up. I look around the apartment, the only source of light being the one I left on at the kitchen island.

A figure standing in the living room doorway catches my attention and I shriek. Pulling my headphones down I reach for my phone, panicking. The person steps into the light and I release a breath I forgot I was holding in the rush of it all.

"Jesus fucking Christ. Are you insane?" I almost yell with a trembling voice. I add a couple more swear words, mumbling them under my breath and in a language my boyfriend speaks ever so fluently.

"I-I am sorry. I didn't want to scare you." Kaapo apologizes, the tips of his ears turning red. Coming up to me I stand up and he wraps his arms around my shaking figure. "I am sorry." He whispers in his native language.

"You scared the hell out of me." I whine placing my head on his firm chest. He just holds me closer and rubs my back soothingly. "What were you even doing standing in the shadow like that?"

"You weren't in bed." His voice is laced with concern, his accent heavy.

"Couldn't sleep." I say in Finnish. My knowledge of that language is not great, but I like it and it makes him more comfortable. It makes our talks more private. More intimate. "I am sorry, I woke you. You should sleep. You have a flight in the morning."

"And you just came back. You are tired too. Come back to bed." He tries to reason with me.

"But I can't sleep." Arguing back I shake my head in his chest.

"And if I help you sleep?"

"How?" Lifting my head I look into his blue eyes.

"Trust me?" Brushing a strand of hair behind my ear his fingers brush my cheek gently.

"Kyllä." I breathe and nod.

Taking me by the hand he walks to the island turning the lights off. The moment it goes dark my heart rate picks up. "Kaapo." He squeezes my palm reassuringly.

"I am right here with you." He pulls me to his chest. Taking me by my thighs he lifts me up. My limbs instantly wrap around him and I burry my face in his neck. "It's alright." Turning his head he kisses my hair and starts walking back to our bedroom.

Flicking on the bedside lamp he sets me on the mattress. He then turns around opening the wardrobe and shuffling around for something. I take off the headphones from around my neck and put them on the bedside table. Tilting my head I watch him, but remain quiet, more than interested in what he is up to. Pulling out a small box he sets it on the ground pluging it in.

He looks up at me with a soft smile. I remember the box! I gave it to him on his birthday. He turns the lamp off and then presses a button on the box. The dark room lights up with many little white starts and green and blue clouds moving like Aurora Borealis. My heart bursts with so much love at this moment.

It's a star projector I gifted him because he missed Finland so much and I thought that seeing the stars would remind him of home. It did. He was so happy he couldn’t stop smiling. I was never more proud of myself as back then for picking the right gift. That is actually how I found out about his interest in the stars.

He climbs onto the bed laying down on his back. Reaching for me he pulls me to his side. He takes the duvet pulling it on top of us. I place my head on his shoulder and his warm palms settle on my waist. “Can you point the Polaris?” He whispers into my hair.

“Of course. It’s uh-“ I let my eyes wander across the ceiling. “There. Pohjantähti.“ I point to a star. “On the right from the light.“ I explain excitedly. “It is part of Big dipper which is uh- Otava in Finnish!“ I look up at him to see if I remembered right.

“Very good.“ He smiles squeezing my hip. “And that,“ he points up, “is Iso karhu. The big bear?“ He questions the last part, unsure of the English translation.

“The great bear. Yes.“ I giggle. “But there is one star missing, no?“ If I recall correctly there should be a mistake in the image. I mean, when we turned it on for the first time Kaapo pointed out the absence of one star.

“Yes, Mizar is not there.“ He confirms. “I still can’t understand how they forgot Mizar when Alcor is right there. Mizar even shines brighter than Alcor!“ He shakes his head. I smile at his passion and the unintentional English thrown into the mix.

“Minä rakastan sinua.“ I whisper filling the silence that settled between us.

“I love you too.“ He mumbles the cute way he always does.

We continue lying in our bed talking about stars we miss so much. I feel my eyelids grow heavy and slowly the stars fade from my view. I feel a shift on the bed and decide to protest. “Don’t leave.”

“I am just going to turn it off.“ He whispers and suddenly his warmth is gone. I pout sleepily reaching my arms out grabbing onto the empty air. I hear a click and feel the bed dip. Then his arms wrap around me and a content smile takes over my face. “Hyvää yöta.“

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Translations:

Kyllä. - Yes.

Pohjantähti - Polaris

Iso karhu - The great bear

Minä rakastan sinua. - I love you.

Hyvää yöta. - Good night.

A/N: Hopefully it was worth the wait.

#kaapo kakko gif #kaapo kakko imagine #hockey imagine #nhl imagine #new york rangers imagine #kaapo kakko #hockey #nhl #New York Rangers #hockey fanfiction #hockey imagines #nhl fanfiction #nhl imagines

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chicgeekgirl89 · 3 years

Text

The Way Our Horizons Meet: Chapter 4

Fandom: 911 Lone Star

Characters: T.K. Strand, Carlos Reyes

Summary: Carlos' perspective through the aftermath of T.K.'s shooting. Follows the events of episodes 1x08-1x10.

A/N: I had a few requests to write T.K. and Carlos’ conversation about what happened in New York. Hopefully I did it justice!

CW: Mentions of past drug use, overdosing, suicide (just mentioned, not attempted)

Read Chapters 1-3 on AO3

Carlos woke slowly in the morning. Sunlight streamed in through the curtains and he frowned trying to get his bearings; usually he was up before the sun, even on his days off. He liked to get a workout in early, before the day had really started. He shifted in the bed, wincing when he realized his left arm was full of pins and needles.

Blinking his eyes open fully he came face to face with T.K.’s sleeping form. Carlos’ mouth slowly curved into a smile. It had been a long time since he’d woken up to someone else in his bed. Even longer since it had been someone he really cared about.

Carlos watched him for a moment, just taking it all in. T.K. was lying on his back, mouth slightly open, chest rising and falling slowly. Last night had been…perfect, was the word that came to mind. There had been nothing between them anymore, nothing standing in the way of their feelings for one another, and they had spent many hours making that clear.

His arm was trapped underneath T.K.’s pillow, hence the numbness running all the way up to his shoulder. He didn’t want to wake his sleeping boyfriend (wow it felt good to call him that), but his arm was starting to tingle painfully. Slowly he attempted to ease it out from under T.K.’s head. Despited his best efforts, T.K. immediately began to stir, inhaling sharply and opening his eyes. “Hey,” he said, voice rough with sleep as he rolled onto his side to face Carlos, allowing him to free his arm completely.

“Hey,” Carlos said fondly, flexing his fingers as feeling began to return. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“That’s okay.” T.K. smiled sleepily.

“Did you sleep all right?”

“Mhmm,” T.K. said as he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Carlos’. “Did you?”

“It was…the best night’s sleep I’ve had in a while,” Carlos said honestly.

“Well,” T.K. grinned lazily at him, “we were pretty enthusiastic when we got back here last night. You were probably exhausted.”

Carlos grinned back, running a hand down T.K.’s side, resting it on his hip as memories of the night before flitted through his brain. They’d had to get a little creative considering T.K.’s stitches situation. He didn’t seem any worse for the wear though. “I think I was.”

T.K. looked a little more awake now, his eyes glinting with that look he got when he wanted something. Carlos liked that he knew what so many of T.K.’s different looks meant now. “Are you still exhausted?” he asked, voice low.

His fingers trailed slowly down Carlos’ spine, causing him to shiver. “Not in the least.”

“Good.” T.K.’s mouth was on his in an instant, hungry, searching, and Carlos lost himself in the kiss as they picked up where they’d left off the night before.

It was an hour later that they both lay in the bed, T.K.’s head pillowed on Carlos’ chest. “I like waking up with you,” he said quietly.

T.K. didn’t say anything for a long moment and Carlos felt the certainty and bliss of the last few hours stutter in his chest. He thought they’d finally been on the same page, but maybe…

His hand fell back to the bed as T.K. abruptly sat up, determination on his face. The sheets twisted around his waist as he crossed his legs and looked seriously at Carlos. “I want you to know what happened in New York.”

Carlos pushed himself up on his elbow, reaching his free hand out to touch T.K.’s knee. “You don’t have to. There’s no pressure. You can tell me now or never, it doesn’t matter to me.”

“I know,” T.K. cupped Carlos’ face in his hand and stroked his thumb across his cheek, his gaze fierce. “And that’s why you deserve to know. If we’re going to give this a shot, you should know everything.”

“Okay,” Carlos said softly, mentally bracing himself. Based on what little he did know, he didn’t think this would be easy to hear.

T.K.’s eyes fell to the bed as he collected his thoughts. “I had only been clean again for about six months when I met Alex. I was at a friend’s birthday party, testing my sobriety in a way I probably shouldn’t have been. Someone introduced us, and we hit it off right away. I realized later the whole thing was a setup. But I was okay with it because Alex was charming and fun and I was so desperate to get my life back on track. He was stable, had a good job, knew where he was going in life; he was everything I wasn’t.

“We were together a little over two years and it was good. We didn’t fight or have problems. I just…didn’t see who he really was until it was too late.” T.K. swallowed hard and twisted his fingers into the sheets. “I loved him. I really did. I wanted to marry him. I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with him.”

He laughed ruefully and shook his head. “My dad never liked him. My mom did, but my mom likes anyone I like. My dad…he didn’t say anything outright but I could tell. And even if he had said something I probably wouldn’t have listened. I’m uh, I’m kind of stubborn.”

“I’ve noticed,” Carlos said with a smile.

T.K. smiled sheepishly. “Yeah well, sometimes it’s for the better and sometimes not so much.” His face fell a little. “I had it all set up. Dinner at this fancy place, I was going to propose right before dessert. So cliché, but that’s what I was going to do.” T.K. gave a humorless laugh. “And when he got there I got so excited and I just couldn’t wait. I pulled out the ring and started to get down on one knee and he stopped me. Grabbed my arm and told me to sit down.”

T.K.’s jaw worked and Carlos could tell tears were near the surface. “Hey,” he said, sitting up so they were eye to eye. “Take your time.”

T.K. nodded gratefully and blew out a shaky breath. “He’d been cheating on me. With his spin instructor. They were in love. Now I wonder if the spin instructor was even the first. There were times he seemed distant, and then a couple months would go by and he would be all attentive and sweet again. I think there might have been others, I don’t know. I didn’t ask.

“I had never felt so stupid. Like it was my fault. If I had just been better, done more then he wouldn’t have had to cheat. And I should have seen it. I just wanted so desperately to tick all the boxes that proved I was doing the right thing in my life that I didn’t see any of the warning signs until after the fact.”

T.K. rubbed his hands up and down his thighs, no longer able to meet Carlos’ gaze. “I knew where to get pills fast. So I left the restaurant and I picked up some Oxy and went home. I didn’t even try to stop myself. I just did what I do best in a personal crisis: completely self destruct.”

Carlos’ heart picked up its pace. He knew where this was going, knew that this story ended with them here, together in bed right now, but that didn’t make it easier to hear.

T.K. cleared his throat. “I wasn’t trying to kill myself. I just…wanted it all to go away. The thought of being left, of not being enough…it eats away at you until it’s all you can think about.”

He shook his head. “I took a few and when that wasn’t enough I took a few more and then a few more. And the next thing I knew I was on the floor, puking my guts out, with my dad and his crew picking up my pieces. It wasn’t my first overdose, but it was the closest I’ve ever come to…if they’d been even a minute later…”

Carlos felt his throat growing tight. He’d come so close to losing T.K. before he’d ever even known him. The thought made him oddly protective. He wished he could somehow reach into the past and keep T.K. from ever knowing such incredible hurt.

“My dad didn’t report it, not the way he should have. If he had I would have been fired,” T.K. said, his voice breaking a little as he spoke. “He basically took control of everything and told me to pack my stuff. Because of me he uprooted his whole life and dragged us here.”

He looked up nervously, trying to judge Carlos’ reaction. “You know the rest.”

“You were right,” Carlos said softly. “That is messy.”

“It’s a lot, I know,” T.K. said quickly. “I just…I want you to understand why some things might be hard for me. I fell so hard and so fast last time and I can’t take risks like that again. My dad, he needs me, now more than ever. I can’t do anything to put my sobriety in jeopardy. And I realize this,” he gestured to the disheveled bedding and their naked bodies, “doesn’t exactly look like going slow, but as far as feelings and stuff like that go…”

“Hey,” Carlos put a hand on his knee, “I will never pressure you into anything you don’t want. We’re in this together.” He looked T.K. directly in the eye. “And I want to be really clear here; you can trust me. Always. It’s going to take time for you to see that, for us to build that trust together, but you can. And any mistakes I make along the way are mine and mine only, not a reflection of you.”

T.K. looked at him for a long moment, a hand coming up to softly touch Carlos’ face. “You’re so ridiculously perfect.”

Carlos shifted, clearing his throat uncomfortably. “That’s the second time you’ve said that.”

“Well it must be true then,” T.K. said with a smile.

“That is…incredibly sweet,” Carlos said. “But if this is going to work, you can’t put me on a pedestal like that. The only place for me to go is down.” He slid his fingers between T.K.’s. “You and I are the same; flawed, human. I am not some…god among men, now matter how much I might want to be. I have my stuff too. Which I’m sure you’ll find out soon enough.”

“You can’t possibly have baggage like I do,” T.K. said, leaning back against the pillows.

Carlos shrugged. “Yours might be more obvious, but mine could be worse. You have to watch out for the quiet ones, isn’t that what they say?”

T.K. raised his eyebrows and smirked. “You certainly weren’t quiet last night.”

Carlos threw a pillow at him, which T.K. easily deflected. Carlos shook his head, but he smiled. “That is not what we’re talking about.” His face grew serious. “If this is going to work you have to love me for who I am, not some idealized version of me.”

T.K. blinked at him for a moment. “Love you?”

Carlos’ cheeks flamed and he rushed to take back the word that had slipped off of his stupid, besotted tongue. “I didn’t mean—I—“

T.K. laughed. “It’s okay, Carlos.”

“No, I’m sorry. You just poured your heart out and I can’t keep my damn mouth shut—”

“Carlos,” T.K. leaned forward and kissed him, effectively cutting off his apology. “It’s okay.” He traced his fingers down Carlos’ cheek. “I may not be ready to say that word yet. But I am ready to be with you.” He brushed a kiss over Carlos’ nose. “And I like you,” he kissed his cheek. “Very,” his ear. “Very,” his neck. “Much.”

They were falling back into the bed again, limbs tangling, lips finding bare skin. They clearly had so much more to talk about, but for now, what they’d said was enough. If this was love, it would find them the time to take care of the rest.

#911 Lone Star #Tarlos #Tarlos Fic #T.K. Strand #Carlos Reyes #1x08 #1x10 #The boys are having some feelings #And sexy times #As per usual #The Way Our Horizons Meet #Chapter 4

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waveypedia · 3 years

Text

they don’t know you like i do

Rymin Week Day 5: Birthdays

1 2 4 6 7

Ao3

Ryan wakes up to a sloppy cheek kiss.

“Mmmm,” he sighs, unconsciously leaning into the source. It’s something soft and warm, and unquestionably familiar and comforting even to his sleep-addled brain. For a minute he slumps drowsily against the warm lump, whatever it is, until it unfortunately moves away. What a tragedy. The universe truly is against him. Just him against the world…

A hand, gentle yet firm, shakes his shoulder. “C’mon, Ry. Time to wake up.”

“Ughhhh,” Ryan mumbles, rolling flat on his back. His eyes don’t want to open. “Not yet.”

If Ryan was more conscious, he’d register the laughter in the other’s voice. “Today’s an important day. Do you remember?”

Ryan sat up, blearily rubbing at his eyes. “Izzit a show day?”

“No, not yet.” Ryan’s eyes opened just in time to see a slightly-blurry but nonetheless beautiful Min hovering in front of his face with an excited yet bashful smile. Ryan couldn’t help a smile of his own, just looking at his handsome boyfriend. Yet all thoughts were dashed when Min leaned in for a kiss, effectively cutting off all of Ryan’s brainpower.

When Min finally pulls away, he is grinning euphorically. “Happy birthday, Ryan.”

Ryan leans into Min’s shoulder. “Happy birthday, Min.”

After a few more kisses, Ryan reluctantly slips out of the warm bed (or lack thereof) and shakes himself awake. The sun is just barely peeking over the horizon, and the interior of the van is shrouded in long shadows. Min, who has never truly taken to getting up early, is starting to droop.

Ryan wraps an arm around his boyfriend. “Not that I don’t want snuggles, Min, but I’m guessing you woke me up for a reason?”

“Oh! Right. Yes.” Min shakes himself, rubbing fatigue out of his eyes, and stands up straight. Ryan scrambles to stand as well so he doesn’t lose his grip.

Min turns and makes eye contact, smirking mischievously. “Check outside.”

“Hmm?” Ryan makes for the van’s back door, tugging a sleepy but excited Min along with him. He opens it and sees… “Wait. We’re here?”

Min grins at him. “Yeah, I did some late-night driving so we could have the whole day to ourselves.”

Ryan laughs, euphoria tinging his voice. His emotions felt uncontrollable and unstable from sleep. He was still in that half-awake state where his emotions hadn’t quite settled yet, and all he could feel was a tidal wave of happiness and love. Affection for his amazing boyfriend.

“Miiiiin,” he faux-whines, squeezing Min’s side. “But now you’re gonna be all tired! And I want to spend time together on our birthday!”

Min coughs lightly, his cheeks coated with a heavy blush. “Well- I- I didn’t drive for too long, Ryan. I’ll be fine.”

Ryan gives Min a long, measuring look, then shrugs. “If you say so. You know yourself best, and I trust you. I’ll be watching you, though, buster,” he says warningly, pointing his fingers at his eyes and then Min’s own.

Min chuckles, somewhat awkwardly. “If it gets to be too much, I’ll say something. I promise, Ryan.”

“Good.” Ryan leans against Min’s side, before changing his mind and pulling his boyfriend into a full hug. “Now let’s go celebrate our birthday, huh? We have two years to make up for!”

Min leans down to rest his chin on Ryan’s shoulder. “I am more than ready.”

They check into the hotel and unpack as quickly as possible. They’re used to getting situated quickly, (all those late nights performing made for good experience) but this time their haste is borne out of excitement instead of fatigue. Once they’re settled, they spent a little while lying on the bed, just cuddling and enjoying each other’s company.

Min lovingly brushes his fingers through Ryan’s hair. He’s done it so many times now since they first embarked on their tour, but Ryan will never get tired of it. He leans his head back into Min’s soothing touch.

He could stay like this forever, but unfortunately, that is not in store. He and Min have a few errands to run. They don’t quite feel like errands, though. Not when they’re spent in the company of each other.

They make a quick stop at the local supermarket for food and supplies. They’re nearly finished, and Min is already outside checking around for an Asian market. Ryan is about to pay and join him, but then his eyes catch on something magnificent.

“Min!! Min, come here! Come look at this!!”

“What?” Min is inside in an instant, eyes wide and hair messy. He looks slightly panicked, and he’s breathing heavier than normal. For a minute Ryan feels guilty for worrying him, but then Min relaxes at the sight of Ryan excited and unharmed. It’s all he can do to keep from bouncing on the balls of his feet - and as Min’s expression shifts from worried to curious, Ryan’s enthusiasm wins out.

“Look at this!!” Ryan gestures to a row of boxes behind him exuberantly.

Min frowns at the shelf, brow furrowed. Ryan can catalogue the moment he notices what Ryan’s trying to show him, because his eyes light up and he breaks out in a grin. “Brownie mix?! Oh, Ryan, you genius!” Min wraps him up in a hug, and Ryan grins into his chest. “We have to make this!”

“You read my mind,” Ryan says as soon as Min lets him go. He grabs a box and places it carefully in the shopping basket.

At the checkout counter, both he and Min can barely contain their excitement. They keep shooting each other mischievous, eager grins every few seconds. The cashier seems slightly curious, but evidently grows tired of them after a few minutes and rings them up with more than a few eye rolls. Once they’ve paid, they practically book it out of the shop, still giggling uncontrollably to themselves.

They can’t wait to make it back to the hotel. The rest of the shopping, usually a fun activity where they discuss all the new (and in Ryan’s case, cursed) food combinations they can try in their budget, feels much more like the chore others regularly lament it to be.

But at last, they make it back. At the sight of the hotel parking lot, they break into a run that doesn’t even stop for the stairs, laughing all the while.

The hotel, of course, has a concierge bell. On impulse, Ryan sneaks back down while the concierge is on break and snatches it, overcome with mischevious giggles like a young child.

When he presents it to Min, safely back in their rooms, he blanches. “Ryan! You can’t just do that! We could get into so much trouble!”

“Ah, I’ll return it when we're done. And I won’t get caught. Don’t worry.” Ryan waves him off, brushing past him from where they stand in front of the closed door. Even though it costs money they don’t have, they’ve sprung for a little kitchenette this time. After all, when can you treat yourself (and your amazing partner) if not on your birthday(s)?

Ryan sets Not-Kez on top of the mini-fridge, in perfect view of his and Min’s tiny cooking spot. “Just like old times, eh, Min?”

“Not in the slightest,” Min says, sounding like he’s torn between a groan and a snort.

“Yeah, I know. This dull thing could never compare to the real Kez.” Ryan brushes his fingers over the disappointingly not-sentient bell, not dissimilar to how Min comforted Kez when she was upset. “It’s not nearly snarky enough.”

That gets a real snort out of Min. “Not counting the weird gravity, giant pig-baby, sentient porcelain cow, and giant kitchen.”

“Don’t forget the post-war American cookbook,” Ryan adds. “Brownies were the only good thing they had.”

“And the only thing we care to replicate.” Min starts pulling ingredients out of their shopping bag. He places the coveted brownie mix in its place of honor next to Kez. “Hey, at least we have butter.”

Ryan laughs. “Just don’t put the butter in the microwave, and we’re good. That goes for you too,” he adds, faux-stern, wagging his finger at Not-Kez.

Unsurprisingly, Not-Kez does not respond. Just another reason why the real Kez is superior.

“This is way easier with regular-size ingredients,” Min comments.

Ryan bursts out laughing, brushing Not-Kez in his haste to keep his balance. “Really? Who would’ve known?”

Min glances back at him, rolling his eyes. “Go back to your humble brownie expert act, please.”

“I am but a simple man,” Ryan parrots dramatically, clutching at his shirt like Min had done all those months ago. “A simple brownie man.”

Min laughs. “All right, all right, that’s enough out of you. Here’s your toothpick, so we can check for fudgieness. You know, so it’s not cake.”

Ryan bows. “Of course, of course, Your Honor.”

Min’s responding giggle is enough to sustain Ryan for years to come. Brownies aside.

After the brownies are done, they curl up in bed with the tray. It’s torture waiting for the brownies to cool down, but a hospital visit from burns would certainly put a damper on their birthday. Not to mention cut into their already lacking budget and tight schedule.

“We’re going to get crumbs in the bed,” Min grumbles when Ryan presents him with a properly-cooled brownie. “Have you ever slept on crumbs, Ryan? Do you know how fun it is?”

“You say that like I don't eat in my bed all the time,” Ryan replies flippantly. He sits down next to Min and purposefully takes the biggest bite possible. They both watch as crumbs scatter onto the bed. Min sighs.

Ryan pauses. “Or. Well. I did.”

“You are literally sitting in your bed right now, leaving crumbs,” Min says, poking Ryan in the side playfully. His smile doesn’t reach his eyes, though. When their gazes lock, Min conveys a silent message. Are you okay?

Ryan nods. Min relaxes, and grudgingly grabs a brownie. “Hmm. These are good.”

Ryan laughs. “Well, what did you expect? They were made by the brownie experts, after all. Or have you forgotten?”

“Forgive me for doubting cheap grocery store mix,” Min deadpans. His smile has returned in full, which in turn only brings a matching smile to Ryan’s face. “But it is quite good.”

“I agree.” Ryan downs his brownie. Somehow, he gets the feeling they won’t be talking much while they eat.

They devour the majority of the pan. It’s with some effort and self-restraint on both of their parts that they finally put the tray away - they both want leftovers, but fresh, warm brownies are difficult to refuse. In the end, the afternoon slips away, dangerously towards dinnertime, and the brownies end up safely stowed in their bag.

Dinner is a quieter affair after the brownie debacle, but it’s no less fun. They head downstairs to find a good restaurant in the area. (And so Ryan can drop off the inferior Kez - he nearly gets caught by the concierge, but slips away just in time. He catches her looking around, baffled, at the mysteriously appearing and disappearing concierge bell as they leave. Min shoots him a glare that feels like it could kill him, but in the end they escape unscathed.) After they make their escape, they end up at a small place with a live band playing on the corner stage.

Ryan nudges Min. “That could’ve been us, you know.”

“Maybe next time we pass through this town,” Min agrees. “But… thanks. I know you would’ve performed on your birthday if it was up to you, but I appreciate you spending it with me.”

Ryan rolls his eyes, although he’s smiling. Perhaps a little too emotionally. “Please, I’d be spending time with you even if we were playing,” he reminds Min. “But really. It’s nothing. I’m just happy to be with you, however we spend our time.”

Min reaches across the table to take Ryan’s hand. His eyes are shining in the soft candlelight. “You have no idea how much that means to me.”

Ryan smiles affectionately. His heart feels like it’s full to bursting. His vision is getting a little blurry. “I think I do, Min. Because I feel exactly the same way.”

Min’s responding smile is enough to make Ryan’s entire year.

The rest of the night is a blur after that. All Ryan really remembers is that he had fun and that he somehow loves Min even more than he did before. Which should be impossible, but it’s the truth.

They end up curled up in the bed together. Right as always, Min complains about crumbs, but his heart isn’t in it.

They don’t stay up too late. As much as Ryan loves his party-filled late nights of adrenaline and bad decisions, they both got up quite early. By the time Min’s arms are tucked securely around him, Ryan is asleep in an instant.

Well, not quite.

He’s in that state of almost-asleep-but-not-really when whatever visually discernible features the hotel room has in darkness are starting to blur beyond recognition when Min says it.

“I love you, Ryan.”

Ryan leans back, cuddling himself into Min. “I love you too.”

oh god this is so late again why can i please stop getting inspiration boosts exclusively at 9pm (i did write 1.5k words in an hour though that's not bad!)

i keep eating on my bed and then every night i'm like god what are these CRUMBS who brought fucking CRUMBS into my bed how dare you skdfhgfkdsk this fic is just projection but in the weirdest, most mundane ways

the beginning of this is actually the first thing i wrote for rymin week! i wrote it a week or so before after i finally figured out my prompt ideas (thank you for talking it out with me sae) and then proceeded to write nothing else but day 1 before the event began skhfjksl. i'm a mess thank you for coming

the worst part of writing post-train is the lack of kez. in a perfect world she got off the train with min and ryan and she and morgan became their floating concierge bell and castle road trip friends. i miss herrrrr

title is from masterpiece theater iii by marianas trench. i rediscovered this song a few months ago after years of not listening to it but the warriors map to it used to be my favorite thing years ago. the actual video didn't come out until i was nearly done with the books but i used to watch the planning video over and over again

if you ever wanna talk infinity train, writing, these amazing characters, or really anything hmu here on my tumblr or twitter! thank you for reading, and please leave a reblog/like/comment if you enjoyed it!

@ryminweek

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refinedbuffoonery · 4 years

Text

You’re The One I Need

Another MacRiley fic! All you die-hard MacRiley shippers are hungry for content. I see you.

******

Set shortly after 4x13. Riley still lives in Mac’s house.

******

They were in the burning warehouse again.

He and Riley survived the explosion by hiding in the tractor scoop, shielding themselves with a sheet of metal. Mac didn’t think twice about whether anyone else survived. Considering the building was full of barrels of gasoline, their chances were slim to none.

He needed to get them out.

He needed to get her out.

“Let’s go!” he screamed. The pair stood and turned, using the sheet metal to block the flames as they backed toward safety. The rags they’d grabbed did little to protect their hands from the hot metal. God, his hands were burning. Mac glanced at Riley. Her face twisted in pain but she held the metal high above their heads. Fierce and unwavering.

Mac snapped his head in the other direction. The flames to his right reached closer, licking his jacket. The burning sheet metal became too much. “Drop it! It’s too hot,” he commanded. Riley let go a split second after he did. He knew that if he hadn’t told her to drop it, she would’ve carried that burning sheet metal across the whole warehouse, destroying her hands in the process, if that was what it took to get them out alive.

They bolted toward the door choking on smoke and fumes. Riley was right on his heels.

Until she wasn’t.

Twenty feet from the door, Mac looked over his shoulder to find Riley on her knees. “RILES!” He spun, wrapped his arms around her, and hauled her to her feet. “I need you to keep walking,” he pleaded. He slung her arm around his shoulders and gripped her waist, half carrying her as they staggered forward.

They closed the distance to the door. To safety.

Riley reached for the doorknob.

A second explosion slammed them against the still-closed door. Mac clutched Riley’s limp body, and the world went dark.

Mac bolted upright, gasping. He took in his surroundings. Moonlight slipped through a gap in the curtains, illuminating a strip of the hardwood floor. The sheets were in a twisted mess at his feet. The angry red numbers on his alarm clock read 4:04 am.

He relaxed a fraction. Just a dream, he reassured himself. Mac checked his hands. No burns. Another sigh of relief. And then--

“Riles,” he whispered to himself. He needed to see her. To convince his brain she was okay.

Mac crawled out of bed and tiptoed across the hall to her room. He knew living with him and Desi was awkward at times, but he’d never been more grateful to have her there. Her door was partially open. He peeked in. Her sheets were in a rumpled mess at the foot of her empty bed. Where was she? Mac started to panic until the soft thud of a closing cabinet gave her location away. He tipped his head back and leaned against the doorframe, letting out the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. He felt like Russ, letting paranoia get to him so quickly.

A floorboard squeaked as he walked down the hall, alerting Riley to his presence. She leaned against the counter holding a glass of water to her lips. “There you are,” Mac said in a low voice. His eyes flicked to her hands, checking for burns he knew weren’t actually there. She looked him over, taking in his tense posture and messy hair. Riley made a face like she was staring at a kicked puppy.

She set down her glass. “Come here.” Her tone was soft but insistent.

Mac didn’t need to be told twice. He closed the distance between them in three steps, pulling her into his chest. A thought crossed his mind. If Desi was here tonight, we couldn’t be hugging like this. She’d have questions he wasn’t sure he knew how to answer.

Mac decided he didn’t care. He readjusted so one hand splayed across Riley’s back while the other cradled her head. Riley rested her chin on his shoulder and wrapped her arms around him.

“I got you,” she murmured.

Traces of her perfume lingered on her skin. He couldn’t name the scent, but it didn’t smell cheap. To him, it just smelled like Riley. Like...safety. The more the world fell apart around him, the more he felt that inexplicable tug toward her. As if she was a lighthouse guiding him to shore. He didn’t want to think about the implications of that.

He pulled away, that little voice in the back of his mind reminding him that they’d hugged for far longer than “just friends” probably should. Whatever. For a second he thought Riley was reluctant to let him go, but he probably imagined it.

Riley’s voice mercifully snapped him back to the present. “Mac, are you okay?” Her eyes searched his face.

“Yeah, I uhh--” he rubbed his neck-- “had a bad dream.” She stayed silent, waiting for him to continue. “We were in the warehouse again, but this time...we didn’t make it out.” He couldn’t bring himself to explain the rest: Riley’s burnt hands, his hyper-focus on getting her out alive and not considering anyone else, the way he’d held her right before they died. Mac shuddered.

Riley seemed to be at a loss for words. After a moment, she finally said, “We’re alright. We made it.” She gripped his bicep. “You got us out, Mac.”

Her words repeated in his head. We’re alright. We made it. Mac tried not to think about those who didn’t make it. The survivor’s guilt would devour him if he let it, and they both knew it. The best he could do now was hope Scarlett and the rest of Gwen’s team were incinerated in the initial explosion. No one deserved the slow, painful death of being burned alive.

You got us out.

I couldn’t have done it without you, Riles.

He focused on his best friend once more. “Thank you. I know I haven’t said it nearly enough, but I’m really grateful...for you and your trust.”

Riley’s lips curved in a small smile. “I wouldn’t want to cheat death with anyone else.”

He smirked. “Likewise, Riles.”

Mac studied an old photo of them taped to the fridge. Jack had taken it on Riley’s first mission in Cuba. She sat in the driver’s seat of the pastel pink convertible they’d stolen, feet propped up next to the steering wheel. Mac sat in the passenger seat, pretending to smoke a cigar. He missed doing stupid stuff like that.

He turned back to Riley. “Why are you awake at four in the morning?”

“Those damn raccoons knocked the trash cans over again and woke me up!” Mac barely stifled his amusement, earning a small shove. “It’s not funny, Mac!” He raised his hands in defeat.

“Are you tired?” he asked, changing the subject. There was no way he’d be falling back asleep any time soon.

“No, not really. Why?”

“Do you want to make pancakes and rewatch Star Wars?” She raised her eyebrows.

“It’s four am.”

“And?”

Riley smirked. “Alright. You start the pancakes, and I’ll start the movie.” She left to dig through the movie cabinet.

Grabbing a mixing bowl, Mac called after her. “The first one!”

“Obviously!” she shot back.

This is why you’re my best friend. Mac smiled to himself as he carefully measured the flour.

******

Desi let herself in at dawn, hoping to sneak in and out while Mac and Riley were still asleep. She just needed to grab the spare boots she’d stashed under Mac’s bed, and she’d be on her way.

The Star Wars theme echoed throughout the house. Desi followed the sound to the living room and stopped dead in her tracks.

She’d expected one of them to be passed out on the couch, but not both. And certainly not for them to be cuddling on said couch with plates and utensils covered in maple syrup at their feet. Desi’s eyes studied the way those talented--in more ways than one--hands held Riley against his chest. Their bodies intertwined as if they’d fallen asleep like this a hundred times before. She couldn’t help but notice how peaceful they both looked. They didn’t have a thing for each other...did they?

Desi was pretty sure she and Mac never looked like that.

She wanted nothing more than to interrogate her boyfriend about why he and his very attractive roommate had eaten pancakes in the middle of the night and were now cuddling on the couch, but she knew how rare sleep was for him--both of them, actually--these days. If this was the only way he’d finally get rest, then so be it. As long as it didn’t become a habit.

Deciding to keep her observations to herself, she quietly retrieved her boots and left. She pitied whoever got stuck with scrubbing those plates when they finally woke up.

#beth writes #macgyver #macriley #angus macgyver #riley davis #I love them with my WHOLE HEART #It starts off angsty but it's fluffy as heck I PROMISE #macgyver fanfiction

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dancing-the-hellfire-rumba · 4 years

Text

Seen ✓ - 3

Pairing: Sam x Reader Warnings: cursing, a bit of self depreciation Word Count: 2.2k Series Summary: On her way home, Y/n finds an abandoned, cracked phone on the sidewalk. Anxious about the well-being of its owner, she picks it up and texts the first contact she finds; Sam. Beta: None

Part 1 - Part 2 Masterlist

Chapter 3: for the love of god, explain this

Sam Winchester lies awake at three in the morning, under foreign, scratchy sheets, stubbornly not tearing his eyes from the cracked, ugly wallpaper on the ceiling. A lot of things are happening and his brain is going about a million miles an hour, spinning endlessly, Castiel, Dean returning from hell, the stress of the hunting life, the current case and… Y/n. Wonderful, smart, talented, funny Y/n.

It’s been a while since someone has made him excited. He keeps bumping into her in his mind, keeps finding thoughts of her lying around, eager to distract him. He catches himself wanting to text her about every stupid thing that happens in his day, much like she sometimes does. She’s been the only thing that makes his heart a little lighter, and it’s such a strange feeling, someone’s presence being this uplifting.

He was suspicious of her at first. A strange woman (at least she claims to be one, he forgets he’s never actually… seen her) asking about him, his profession, and then about… ghosts? A bit random, too specific, Sam recognizes he got defensive. But the way she spoke afterwards… he doesn’t know. His instinct tells him to trust her.

Amidst his thoughts, he doesn’t remember picking up his phone, but it’s just one of those nights, he needs someone to talk to- or rather, wants Y/n specifically. A thought he chooses not to dwell on.

are you awake? I can’t sleep.

I actually am. Lucky you.

Sam smiles. Lucky me, he thinks.

isn’t it like 4 am for you?

Tell me about it. No luck sleeping either.

happen to you a lot?

Yeah.

I happen to have anxiety induced insomnia.

Working at a bar also helps fuck up your sleeping schedule as well.

You?

i’m sorry :/

i don’t get much sleep either. something always keeps me up.

Yeah, I get that.

Where in the Great Unites States of America are you today?

hahah it’s Oregon today.

it’s the ugliest motel room i’ve ever been in.

Ooh

Do I ask about your case or is it confidential?

it’s confidential but i’ll tell you that i am investigating a bunch of strange murders.

You’re investigating serial killers?? That’s so fucking dope.

something like that yeah.

how was your day?

Oh, you know. The usual.

College assignments, a shift at the bar. I went out with a friend I hadn’t seen in a while.

I need to clean my house desperately.

I also nearly burned my kitchen down trying to cook lunch. Emmy and I ended up eating some lazy-ass spaghetti, because pasta is the only thing I can cook, apparently.

hahahah what were you making?

You’re gonna laugh if I tell you.

well now you must.

Ugh, do I?

come onnn

It was eggs, okay? I was just trying to make eggs.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAH

I TOLD YOU YOU’D LAUGH AT ME

HOW DID YOU BURN EGGS?!

LISTEN, OKAY

I NEVER SAID I WAS A GOOD COOK

HAHAHAHAH

Sam laughs over his phone, as silently as he can, so as to not wake Dean up. He turns on his other side and realizes his cheeks hurt from smiling, and it’s a feeling he’s missed.

Yeah, yeah, laugh, culinary genius. Not all of us can be perfect.

i never said i was a culinary genius

but at least i don’t go near stoves if i don’t have to.

Well, it’s not like I can afford every-day takeout (or like that shit is healthy, even if I could) and someone has to cook for my sister while she’s in school

you have siblings?

and yeah you’re right i didn’t think like that sorry.

It’s okay.

And yeah, my sister, Emily.” Emmy”

oooh i thought emmy was your friend.

Nono, it’s my sister. She’s 17.

can i ask you a personal question?

Shoot

why do you have to take care of her? are your guys’ parents not around?

you don’t have to answer if you’re not comfortable with that.

Well, it’s a bit complicated.

My parents’ marriage kind of fell apart when I was around 10. They tried to fix things by adopting a kid- Emily. For a while that worked.

When I was 16 my mom took off and dad took care of us for 2 years almost. He really dedicated himself to us.

He worked his antique shop and supported us. For two years, I didn’t see him spend a penny on himself.

But I ended up having to take care of Em when he passed. I was freshly 18, so I could take care of her as a guardian.

shit i’m so sorry.

It’s okay, honestly.

I mean, it didn’t use to be, and it was hell for a while.

But we made it.

i admire your positivity.

I try :)

i also love that you put smiley faces in your text messages.

Shouldn’t have said that, now I’ll always think about it before I do it

hahah

Sam bites his lip. What the hell is happening? They’re… flirting. Sorta. And it’s nice- better than nice. Fuck.

What about you?

you mean what’s my relationship with my parents?

Well, when you put it like that it sounds stupid. It wasn’t what I was asking either.

What I meant was, how’s your life right now. How’s the family business. You can pick which you wanna answer.

i don’t mind either honestly.

as for my parents my mom died when I was 6 months old. my dad passed away about a year and a half ago.

Jesus, I’m so sorry Sam

I don’t know what to say. It can’t have been easy. Losing a parent never is.

it wasn’t but as you said we’re trying to sort of find our footing with Dean. we’ve had our ups and downs.

Yeah I understand that.

Do you wanna talk about it?

right now not really. I mean there’s not much to say about it.

i kinda wanna forget about it. thanks though.

Alright.

So how’s the family business?

Does it feel good to be paid to be Sherlock Holmes?

crap. but we’re doing our best.

for the record i don’t get paid nearly enough for the shit i have to do.

Hahaha, hang in there.

Dean still refuses to come get his phone?

yeah. he says you can keep it.

Tell him to take care of his devices from now on, this one was battered beyond recognition.

duly noted.

The conversation continued until well after the sun rose. Sam had officially accepted this night to be sleepless, and Y/n was good company. Somehow she took his mind off of everything that was bugging him, made him, if momentarily, forget about it, and he truly loved that about her. The back and forth tended to flow easily between them, and he couldn’t get enough of the chemistry he had with this practical stranger.

Sleepless or not, this night was a good one, after she entered the picture.

The glow on her skin is blue-ish and soft, combatting the one from the fairy lights above them. Laptop absolutely not low in volume, couch dipping under two bodies, slumped together, legs leaning against one another, soft flannel pants and droopy eyes. Emily’s hair is out of its usual half-up hairstyle, exploding with volume and bright, firey color, flowing onto the back of the couch.

Jon Snow is yelling on the screen, and Y/n is completely ignoring him, constantly checking her inactive phone and the way the screen doesn’t light up with Sam’s name. Every time she feels disappointed, she tries to quell the relentless thoughts of the possibility of him being completely over her.

Damn it.

“Do you have a boyfriend or a girlfriend I’m not aware of or something?” Emily mutters dryly, half-hearted but gentle teasing. Y/n sputters.

“Huh?”

“’Cause you keep checking your phone, and as far as I know you don’t have any friends.”

“HEY,” deeply offended, Y/n places her hand over her heart, glaring at her sister. “Excuse you!” she exclaims, “Connor? Ashley? Lydia?”

“Yeah, a neighbor and two college students that you haven’t talked to in like, what, two weeks? What a social butterfly.”

“Okay first off,” Y/n ignores the screaming and fighting on the screen and shifts to look at her sister. “Stop tracking my socializing.” Em scoffs.

“C’mon, bear, spill.” Bottom lip pouted. She pauses the episode, turning to face her older sister. “Who are they and when can I meet them?” A devilish smile, teasing like only a younger sister can, curling the right corner of her lip.

“He’s not my boyf-“

“AHA! So there is someone! I knew it!”

“I’ve known him for like- what, three weeks? Nothing is going on! I barely know the guy!” Y/n fiddles with her hair and huffs, holding back a smile.

“Where’d you meet him? Is he hot? What’s he like?!” Poking her sister’s thigh continuously, she grins wide, excited. “C’mon, you’re like, no fun.”

“The thing is… I didn’t. Meet him, I mean.” Eyebrows furrow.

“Uh…” Emily purses her lips. “I’m … not following.”

It takes all of five minutes for Y/n to explain to her sister all about her crazy adventure, the lost phone, the brother, Sam. The girls munch on leftover garlic spaghetti, talking about the stranger on the other side of Y/n’s screen.

“He’s just… different? I don’t know- I just, I’m intrigued I guess. He’s mysterious and hilarious. The type of guy we’d hang out with. Why pass it up?”

“Just hang out?” Emily wiggles her eyebrows. Y/n shoves her.

“It’s really not like that.”

“I don’t know, Y/n, he doesn’t necessarily sound just friendly to me.” Y/n won’t lie and say she hasn’t thought about it. She’s a romantic after all, and what a wonderful, movie-like love story would it be for them to fall in love and march into the sunset?

But she recognizes this is the romantic side of her picking up speed on a subject that definitely isn’t for her to decide alone. There’s a second participant in all of this, and he needs to do more than half the work by liking her. She knows it’s no easy feat. A bitter dab of paint dissolves in her chest, because why would he like her? She’s nothing quite special. She’s just a bartender, a college student, a boring, normal girl, painfully mundane, painfully boring. He’s brilliant, kind and sweet, a private investigator, he travels all the time, he’s the most interesting guy she’s ever met for crying out loud. Why would he ever give her a chance?

“I doubt it, Em,” is what Y/n decides to say, because there’s no way she can explain exactly what she’s thinking.

“No, no, you’re doing that thing again.” A hum in question falls from the older Andrews’ lips. “The thing where you put yourself down for bullshit reasons. He’d be lucky to have you.” Y/n wants to roll her eyes. “Hey,” a snap of Emily’s fingers in front of Y/n’s face to catch her attention. “I will literally slap you. You’re smart, funny, kind. He’d be fucking lucky to have you, and if you don’t believe it, I’m gonna beat some sense into you. Stop putting my sister down.” Y/n doesn’t have anything good to say to that, so instead she lets out a huffed breath of a laugh and sits back on the couch.

“Now,” Emily leans over her own crossed legs and grabs her phone from the rickety coffee table. “Did you Google him?”

“Why the heck would I Google him?”

“It’s the 21st century, Y/n, gosh. Are you at all familiar with internet stalking?” Y/n watched pebbled coffee brown eyes get illuminated by the phone screen, freckles nowhere near as bright as they can be, because she hasn’t gone out into the sunlight today. Emily is gorgeous. Y/n is sometimes jealous, but also genuinely admires her younger sister. “What’s his name?”

“Sam Winchester.”

There’s typing, and then silence.

“Y/n…” And the warning tone on the younger one’s voice completely throws her off.

“What? What is it?” A phone screen is thrust in her face.

Mail fraud, credit card fraud, grave desecration, armed robbery, kidnapping, three counts of first-degree murder, and breaking and entering, she reads. Winchester brothers Sam and Dean, disappeared, considered dead.

“What the fuck,” she mutters under her breath, completely horrified at the chance that this is real and the universe isn’t playing some comic joke on her, creating another pair of Winchester brothers called Sam and Dean who, instead of chasing murderers, are the murderers.

She scrolls lower and sure enough, there they are. Mug shots, but more specifically, the guy from the dating app, smouldering cheekily into the camera –a real blue steel-, holding a police station name on a black plaque, sitting at close to six feet and two. Then the younger one, less joyful and sassy, more serious and puppy-eyed. Sam. Close to what was described to her, it’s all there. Pointy nose, sharp jawline, curly brown hair with a growing, swoopy fringe, pulled behind his ears. It’s him. There’s no way, the coincidences are too many.

“Bear…” Emily stares at Y/n’s shocked face, gaze empty and out of it. “What the hell have you gotten yourself into?”

Immediately, Y/n grabs her phone.

Sam

His reply is instantaneous.

hey y/n

i was just thinking about you

what’s up?

Please for the love of God.

Explain this.

She sends him the mugshot, photographed from the screen of her sister’s phone.

shit.

Part 4

A/N: Tell me what you thought? How the hell does he even explain this?

I realized I haven’t been tagging my forever taglist like a MORON, so just, sorry, I’ll start now.

Forevers: @deanxfuckingadorablexwinchester @deanssweetheart23 @nostalgic-uncertainty @mogaruke @superseejay721517 @lady-hawkguy @thosefeelsarereal @superwholockmarauder @justiceiswater @petra-arkanian-1497 @heyitscam99 @danijimenezv @aj-reuth @unicornblood4ever @mystriee @sadist-fangirl23 @asguardiansoftheavengers @superrandomnatural @altosaxplayer098 @winter-moons @hunterswearingplaid @novaddictx @choosemyname @live-like-a-girl @thisismysecrethappyplace @bowtomytenderaddiction @elara98azalea @lemondropirwin @emmagolden4118 @glitchcypher @calaofnoldor @paradoxical-sleep @narynechan @canwenotdothis @suicidepanda07

Sam Taglist

@kymberlytorres @theboykingsamwinchester @depressed-moose-78 @andi-mendes-barnes @captainmarvelcorps @nerd-in-a-galaxy-far-away @nellachain

Seen Taglist @shutupiminlooove @sammysgirl1997 @kymberlytorres @bambi95-blog @demonic-meatball @thekarliwinchester @littlekay15 @li-m-ii @thinspo-isuppose @carryonmywaywarddemigodwitch @ellen-reincarnated1967 @moonlitskinwalker @marichromatic @illuminatus42 @lazy-author @mirandaaustin93 @hauntedsiriel @pilaxia @devilgirlsarah @nobodys-baby-now @captiveties @calamitychaos @midiocris @wordswillscream @burningforsam @aiofheavenandhell

#sam x reader #sam winchester #sam winchester x reader #sam #spn fanfiction #supernatural #spn #sam x reader fluff #sam fluff #sam x reader angst #sam angst #spn fluff #spn angst #sam winchester fluff #seen #seen 3

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