#never ending cycle of getting her and losing her | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

strwbrryeyes · 2 days

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☼ bye ☼ (oikawa tooru x reader)

⟡ cw: she/her pronouns used, angst, break up, getting back together at end, idk im still bad at these, lmk if i miss anything else

⟡ a/n: i have my own interpretation of this song so it doesn't really follow the meaning behind it? idk but i still like it (even if i did write it poorly) but bear with me this song didn't have a lot to work with despite it being very catchy also rip a good third of this was just iwa #iwa4life

⟡ eternal sunshine masterlist

You and Oikawa had been dating since your third year of high school so about 4 years now and to say you had a wonderful yet disastrous relationship was an understatement. He was the perfect boyfriend, attentive, loving, caring, admirable- anything that comes to mind. Oikawa Tooru was picture perfect and so were you. At least 99% of the time. That 1% that was not perfect was whenever you would feel insecure or jealous of the girls that would constantly throw themselves at him. It’s a silly thing really, he did choose you over everyone else after all so you didn’t think you had anything to worry about and Oikawa thought so too so he never really reassured you and tried to take those insecurities away from you. Anytime you brought up how uncomfortable you felt with how touchy his fans were with him he would shrug it off and tell you to pay no mind to it but never actually address how you felt about it all.

There were countless times where you would lie awake at night thinking about if you were really just overreacting or if you were actually valid in the fear of losing Oikawa’s interest over time as he gains more fame and as more girls fall for him. You even confided in two of your best friends, Matsukawa and Hanamaki, and sure they were also best friends with Oikawa but over the last few years they have not been that close to Oikawa considering how much he traveled for volleyball, regardless though, they remained as neutral as they could. The pair of boys would reassure you and say that it’s just the result of the spotlight Oikawa has had on him since the beginning of high school. This reasoning made you feel better and you would shrug it off for as long as your mind would let you. It was a constant cycle and you were as used to it as you could be until one day when Iwaizumi knocked some sense into you.

☼ ⋆。𖦹˚⋆

“Listen [name], as much as I cherish shittykawa as my best friend, I also cherish you just as much.” Iwaizumi says with a worried expression on his face as he slows down his pace as you two were on your weekly jog and after you didn’t respond for a few seconds, he stopped jogging all together and grabbed your wrist to make you face him. “Break up with him.” Iwaizumi said with all seriousness in his tone.

You had just told him about your most recent fangirl incident where a fangirl asked for a picture with Oikawa where he would kiss her cheek, this wasn’t an unusual request that was asked of him but that didn’t make you feel any better every time it happened even if you did simply roll your eyes at it and just shrugged it off every time. This time was different though. As Oikawa was going in for the kiss on the cheek, the girl turned her head so that their lips would collide. Of course the girl faked a panicked apology and said she wasn’t ready and just turned to ask him a question and of course Oikawa said it was okay in an all too calm manner causing the girl to give you a smug look when Oikawa turned around to tend to another fan. At that point though, you didn’t even bother bringing it up to Oikawa because you thought he would just dismiss it as usual.

“I was expecting you to find some way to defend him to be honest… I was kind of hoping you would actually…” you sigh as you sit down at a nearby bench with Iwaizumi sitting down next to you.

“Why would I defend him?”

You sigh while burying your face in your hands “I don’t know? Because you guys have been friends since you were childr-” “We’ve been friends for ages, [name]” Iwaizumi interrupts you “All three of us met each other at the same time back in grade school. Just because I’ve spent more time with Oikawa doesn’t mean I don’t care for you both equally and because I care for you two idiots so much…I think it is best for both of you to end things.” he continued as he forced you to face him once again.

“But Haji…he’s all I’ve known. Even before we started dating in our last year of high school… it has always been Tooru.” Your words begin to wobble as you feel a few tears fall down your face.

“Which is exactly why you guys need to at least take a break,” Iwaizumi begins as he wipes away a few tears. “You need time for yourself, to figure out what you want out of this relationship or any relationship. Hell, to figure out what you want for yourself, [name]. For the last few years you’ve been following Oikawa around while he plays volleyball and not once have I seen you be passionate about your own interests. You’ve made your life revolve around him ever since we graduated high school.” Iwaizumi’s tone starts to harden causing you to slowly stop crying “As for Oikawa, he just needs to get his head out of his ass and realize that there are other people in the world besides himself.” Iwaizumi finishes before standing up and holding out his hand to help you up that you accepted. And with that, you knew what you had to do.

☼ ⋆。𖦹˚⋆

“Welcome back, darling!” Oikawa greets you with a kiss on the forehead as you walk into your shared apartment. “How was your jog with Iwa? What did you guys gossip about this time~” Oikawa wiggles his eyebrows as he waits for your response since he knew you both would always talk shit about people.

As you walked to the couch without saying a word, Oikawa followed you assuming you were tired and just wanted to sit down and catch your breath first but that assumption didn’t last long when you turned to look at him with a serious expression making him confused

“We need to break up, Tooru.” you finally say, causing all the color drain from his face.

“What do you mean we need to break up? I thought everything was going great?” Oikawa sputters out while desperately grabbing your hand.

“Everything is great but there are just some things we need to think about if we want to continue with this relationship…” You start off before explaining all the things that have been troubling you along with the talk you had with Iwaizumi.

After a long talk that lasted hours and that included a lot of emotions, you and Oikawa came to an agreement to end things and to better yourselves- you with your confidence and insecurities and individuality and him with his consideration for other people and how he handles boundaries he and other people set. You also both talked about the possibility of maybe trying a relationship with each other if you both still had love for each other later down the line.

With all that said and done, Iwaizumi came and helped you pack your things right after the break up just so neither you or Oikawa would back out of it and by afternoon the next day, you were moved out of the apartment you had known for the last few years and moved in with Hanamaki and Matsukawa who were more than glad to give you their spare room.

You were now excited to start a new part of life even if it would take a while to get over the grief of the relationship and even if it did take a while to stop crying every night because all you wanted to do was call Oikawa. You knew better than that though. This was the best decision or the both of you.

☼ ⋆。𖦹˚⋆

Two years later, Oikawa’s fame in the volleyball community skyrocketed and he was doing what he loved and always dreamed of, while you were the happiest you’d been in what seems forever.

The last two years have taught you both a lot about yourselves and allowed the two of you to grow as people. You have grown more confident with yourself and have picked up new hobbies and have gained passion for a few things that you plan to turn into a full fledged career and you were excited for what more the future holds for you. As for Oikawa, he has become less self-focused and has set proper boundaries with his fangirls and even other people, overall has just gotten better at maintaining his relationships with his friends, family, and whoever else mattered to him. Except you.

You and Oikawa haven’t spoken to each other in a year and half but that doesn’t mean you guys didn’t think about each other all the time. Oikawa has never left your mind and you have never left his. Admiring each other from afar, you both have grown very proud of the person the other has become. You both have gotten so proud of each other that it's gotten to the point where it’s so bad that Iwaizumi, Makki, and Mattsun have to force you and Oikawa into the same room to finally talk and catch up so they wouldn’t be forced to listen to your praises for one another every time one of you so much as blinked.

So that’s how you ended up stuck in Iwaizumi’s room with the door blocked on the other side so neither you or Oikawa could escape.

“We’re not letting you out until you kiss!” Makki shouts from outside the room earning a smack on the head from Iwaizumi.

“Ignore him and just talk.” Mattsun says with a giggle before walking away with Makki leaving only Iwaizumo to guard the door.

After a few minutes of awkward silence, you finally gathered the courage to sit next to Oikawa who was sitting on the floor on the other side of the room. He watched you as you fiddled with your hands before grabbing them into their own as to calm you down since he always knew that was a sign of you being anxious. And in that moment, you hugged him like you were never letting him go and of course, he hugged you back with the same amount of love and care before you both started happy crying.

After a few more moments of emotional silence, you pulled away from each other and talked about everything you’ve been wanting to talk about for the last year and a half and it was like you never left each other’s side.

“I missed you, Tooru.”

“I missed you too, angel.”

Finally, after all this time, you both had talked things out and decided to try things out again. You loved Oikawa and Oikawa loved you and you would and will do everything you can to never be apart from each other ever again.

#oikawa tooru #oikawa tooru x reader #oikawa x reader #oikawa angst #oikawa tooru angst #oikawa x reader angst #oikawa tooru x reader angst #oikawa x reader fluff #oikawa tooru x reader fluff #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader angst #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x reader fluff

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dekarios · 1 month

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You can talk about it and I don't think you ever stop missing dogs. I lost one this time last year and still miss her and I still miss the my dog that passed in 2012 too. They are family as far as I am concerned and you will probably always miss her.

Hope you are well and if you need to talk about it please do.

thank u this message rly helped

#fray.txt #ask #Anonymous #i miss my pippy too and i still talk about her like shes with us and send her pics when i show my dogs #and shes been gone awhile now.... i dont actually keep track of the dates ngl #i feel like toos just . touched me in a way that . idk . she was my therapy dog she was everything to me .#when i was at my most delusional i thought we were literal soulmates and spiritually connected and stuff #and when i was at my lowest i told her that im gonna stay alive for her. and that when shes gone i'll go too #its so hard breaking a dumb promise i should have never made #but life without her is so considerably worse . getting up out of bed is agony. doing anything just sucks #i cant do Anything without someone encouraging me cuz she would follow me everywhere without fail and shes not there anymore #i still have her beds in my room #i dont have her toys anymore cuz i buried them with her. she took one of my favourite blankets too #god i wish i could just . loop the last 10 years for the rest of my life #never ending cycle of getting her and losing her #i would do it again and again and again . she was the best thing that ever happened to me

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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thebirdandhersong · 1 year

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sometimes it is weirdly cathartic to watch a woman go insane on the screen/page/stage. I get that. Expression of our negative emotions so openly and unashamedly portrayed, which we are not allowed to/ought not to/were raised not to express in such a way in public or whatever. It can feel like some sort of release to see that. However. Watching Alina go from punching Nikolai in the face for lying to her to straight up murdering a crazy lady high on magical people drugs with the very same power that the Darkling used was so disconcerting that I leaned away from the screen.

#some of y'all are pumping your fists and going YEAH ALINA CORRUPTION ARC LET'S GO #not i. i am sitting here in the corner with people waving smelling salts over me. i am groaning and half conscious #the POINT OF HER CHARACTER ARC in the end is to KEEP being hope for the future???? like??????#yes yes controversy about her losing her powers. BUT. her powers are given to others. it's like a big candle giving its light to little can #candles. they can HELP with dispelling the dark and with making the world a brighter and better place.#and she gets to be hope and light on a local level by opening an orphanage and loving unwanted children #with the kind of care and thought and love that she and mal were never given?? like??? she breaks the cycle of violence and cruelty #and her legacy is a legacy of love????#anyway. not a fan of corruption arc alina. don't want to see it don't care for it also on another point i also don't care for sturmhond mal #who's going out into the world to find himself. like. no thanks #songbird again

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sl33pyperson · 5 months

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i simply want darcel to burn from their own lack of taking things as far as they possibly can and everything in their failed ambition biting them back

#im not wording this right but like #their whole thing is Be Entertaining To Ur Patron Do Things Never Done Before Find New And Rare Experiences #and most of them ends up with being a terrible person lol #darce is normally “whats the most unlikely option to choose. i want that one” unless it grinds against her slowly deteriorating morals #they swing and they hit Alot. but hesitate at the last second #and will spend their entire life wondering what it would be like if they took over the absolute for themselves #power corrupts ! and u hesitated! congrats all of ur misdeeds will haunt u forever no matter what now!#u are a hero and ur patron is losing interest in u! ur losing ur powers! ur being hunted down by your ex whos heart u repeatedly tried to #break to see her explode! the one guy u helped become a god keeps leading u on “oh youll be my first choice as a chosen just all these #rules” darce gale does not care for u in that way anymore u cant manipulate him for power :/// the only person who can stand to be around u #is astarion and youre slowly becoming his personal bloodbag bc u were his first friend. keep your friends close!!!#do u let urself be dragged into the hells only to be abandoned to ur hungry vengeful patron. or u do let urself become a spawn for the man #helped push to continue the cycle of abuse!!!! the wheel fucking turns baby!!!!!!!! u destroyed everything for ur powers and theres nothing #left as fuel!!!!!#i love darcel theyre terrible and i get to be terrible back #speaking time

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roturo · 7 months

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ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ OH! SO YOU'RE INTO OLDER MEN?

˚₊·➳❥ JJK MEN SHOWING YOU HOW A REAL MEN FUCKS! satoru gojo, suguru geto, kento nanami, toji fushiguro ✧˚ · .

tags: afab!reader, reader is mentioned as a female, use of nicknames (baby, princess, doll, slut, whore), cheating, degradation, caught cheating, getting caught, unprotected sex, blowjob, pussy slapping, mating press, breeding, age-gaps, virginity loss [...] rbs are appreciated!

satoru gojo (Daddy’s girl)

well, that’s the word he used for the little girl you're babysitting right now. he’s a great dad and husband. there’s just this tiny whiny little thing he couldn’t do right– and that’s loving his wife as he should.

like– it’s not that he doesn’t feel guilty, it’s just… well, you looked really cute in that mini dress, he and his wife have been fighting lately anddd– he could tell his daughter liked you more than her fatality of mother she has these days. she even called you mommy by accident once! and that was the last water drop gojo needed for the glass to break.

“Oh- I bet you’d love to be full of me right now.” His thrusts became messier each time he pounded on you, “Mhh, fill you up ‘n make me a daddy again– you’d like that princess?” you couldn’t even talk anymore with how good he’s making you feel– he had your legs pressed on the bed thanks to his arms, almost bending you in half, he was making sure that mating press works.

“Ffffuckk- You feel s’good baby” He felt your walls clenching again, no matter how many times he made you come, he’s making sure you’re coming again after he does. A not ending cycle for him. “Such a slut for me hm? Coming all nice and pretty to this house just to be ruined at night–” his words made you feel dirty, but the euphoria of it was stronger, “such” slap, “a nasty” slap, “slut” slap– “and all f’me” with those last thrusts your body couldn’t take it anymore, spasming and trembling while your poor hole was filled up again. gojo’s wife didn’t even bothered to break your little encounter, she suspected it long time ago.

all that was left was a wide grinning gojo satoru and some divorce papers.

suguru geto (Daddy’s best-friend)

you didn’t intend this to happen… you always knew your dad’s best-friend was hot. he’s geto, ‘cmon. he brings a new girl every weekend whispering in your dad’s ear swearing she’s the one this time.

he saw you grow up, turn into this beautiful and strong woman. so how he couldn’t love you? you were like a doll for him, so beautiful and radiant in every way. a porcelain doll he needed to protect, he couldn’t lose you to any dangerous or stupid man, he swears he would beat the shit out of the guy who breaks your heart first.

“Shhiiiitt– Heh– I can tell how tight your pussy is princess–” His cock was stretching the living shit out of you, touching places never in a thousand years you could imagine you would feel. “what d’ya think daddy would say if he saw his little girl being fucked by his best-friend huh?” your brain was a fuzzy mess, you couldn’t make coherent words to say, and just feel how good geto is making you feel. you couldn’t remember how many times he had made you cum with his toungue and he’s just starting to fuck your pussy.

“ ‘m such a lucky guy if i'm the first you’re giving this pussy to, don’t ya think so doll? marking it as mine, baby I swear you’ll need no man to ever fuck this pussy of yours again– shit I won’t need another woman for myself, you’re the one baby” those words filled your heart of a tingly feeling, making more butterflies roam around your tummy, touching yourself you could sense geto’s cock coming and leaving with every thrust, your brain full of air and in need of more of his cock.

he couldn’t resist himself anymore when he was next to you, his cock would get hard the minute he enters your house, and thankfully he has a pretty doll to release himself with.

kento nanami (Big Boss)

Nanami thinks he’s a good and mature guy– At least for his wife and kids… He has this aura of a serious and mature guy but inside every time he’s just this close to breaking it, just to say what he really thinks or feels.

the first time he saw you at work with your tiny skirts and tight blouses he didn’t mind any type of attention to it, you were another cute worker, that’s all. One of another– he can think other women are pretty too right? maybe even prettier than his wife… and nicer, and cuter, and more homely feeling to be a mom. but he wouldn't do anything he would later regret right?...

“You’re s’pretty baby, such a dirty whore for my cock mhm?” he had you pounding from behind, his desk becoming even messier than it was before, one of his hands keeping you laid down on the desk arching your back like if he’s trying to break it– a sudden ringing brought you back from your unconsciousness of nanami’s cock– he answered the call, not a single sing of him trying to stop thrusting into you.

“Yeah?” his voice was out of breath, almost sounding like a sigh when he answered the call, “Where am I? Huh– I’m at the office r-right now…?” he wasn’t even sure if he could keep this act, losing himself more in the feeling of your pussy clenching on his cock– “Oh yeah- I’m okay, uhh- the kids? yyeah, yeah, they’re with my mom right now–” the feeling of keeping up a call with his wife while fucking you made his cock twitch inside of you, feeling like a teenager kissing their crush for the first time. it was no surprise for him that his wife was cheating, but he wanted to keep it like that for the sanity of his kids.

“Quit the act Kento– I know you’re fucking somebody else right now. See ya at home.”

toji fushiguro (Step-Daddy)

you hated when your mother started dating new guys. they just kept breaking her heart– but you just stopped telling her that it's okay to live without a partner, that she had you by her side, but well… this new man was something else i guess and you didn’t say anything for the sake of your own good mother.

you didn’t like him, but for the sake of your mother you pretended like you do– and let’s be honest, toji doesn’t like children, so when he first met you he wasn’t as social as others… your mom was just too good to simply let go– but the way you moved, talked, dressed caught his attention, and as time passes and he spends more time with your mom– he's no longer drawn to your house just to see your mother, but to see you.

“Sshhiit- You’re making me feel s’good baby” the lack of air was making you feel giddy, but the way his cock twitched inside your mouth made your core get even wetter. “C’mon baby, ride my shoe,” you wasted no time before your hips started moving, trying to gain some friction and release that tingly feeling coming from your core.

“D’ya think your mother would like to see her daughter being full of his step-daddy’s cum?” he gets one of his arms behind himself trying to gain some support while his other free hand caresses your cheeks while you continue sucking– this same hand moves out your head and frees his cock out of your mouth, a small strand of saliva connecting your mouth with it–

“Fuck– guess i choose the wrong out of you two”

#gojo satoru smut #geto suguru smut #nanami kento smut #toji fushiguro smut #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #gojo smut #geto smut #nanami smut #toji smut #toji fushiguro x reader #gojo satoru #geto suguru #nanami kento #toji fushiguro #gojo satoru x reader #geto suguru x reader #nanami kento x reader #fushiguro smut

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afternines · 1 year

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#i mentioned this on twitter circle but i need to repeat myself here just cause i can #i am forever stuck in the befriending someone > getting obsessed with them > getting sick n tired of the obsession > ghosting them n ruining #our friendship cycle #like tell me why im on twitter friend 184726 and ive gone through the exact same process with each n every one of them #currently ghosting my latest friend and it makes me SO MADDSD cause i spent the last few months having brzakdowns in her dms abt how im #terrified shell get tired of me and well stop being friend and ill end uo alone again #and she kept comforting me saying that wont happen!!! shell stick with me forever!!!!! and here i am doing the ol switcheroo ghosting her #I AM AWARE that im so very in the wrong with this because she didnt do anything wrong its just like a switch in my brain clicked and i cant #even look at her username without getting nauseous n it makes me wanna kms bc i wanna dm her so bad but i physically cannot get myself to #do it #which is so stupid like. just fucking click the dm and type some words goddamn #i alr know im gonna lose her over this caus ethats how i lost everyone else too and it sucks so bad bc the problem is MEEEE yet i cant get #myself to fucking fix it #i genuinely dont know what to do #im so desperate to have good relationships with other people but every time i do i just end up sabotaging myself #and im so fucking self aware about it but i cant do anything about its like. staring at a zoo animal from behind the glass except the zoo #animal is also me and its jusr staring back at me with eyes full of anger because im also the person who got me captive behind the glass in #the first place #if that makes sense #n uhhh this is a conversation for another time but im gonna be forever craving and never getting a genuine romantic n intimate relationship #because of how i keep sabotaging shit #sev mentioned this at some point and i was like :(. like i was genuinely upset for them but just now it hit me in the same situation #like i fully understand sev im sorry it took me so long to realise #jesus fuck man. not having a normal brain really sucks

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

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soaps-mohawk · 2 months

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Cherry Red, Crimson Blood

Chapter 12: Fire In My Veins

Summary: Your heat begins. Luckily you have a good alpha to take care of you during your most vulnerable time.

Pairing: Poly 141 x reader

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, smut, oral fingering, p in v sex, unprotected sex, knotting, spanking (it’s like once), fluids so many fluids, heat cycles, mating cycles, lots of talk of breeding and mating, biting, brief mention of blood, this is gross y’all, Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, Alternate Universe, a/b/o typical classism and sexism, language, and of course a little fluff

A/N: It was quite the ordeal, this chapter, and it's come a long way from when I first wrote it between Sunday and Monday this week. It's pretty much just smut so enjoy!!

The smut starts after the first scene and goes to the end, so only read up to the first green line if you don’t want the smut. You’re not missing much, just Price biting the reader to claim her, but I’ll talk more about that in the next chapter.

MASTERLIST | <- Previous | Next ->

“You alright, love?”

You look up from where you had been staring at the floor, suddenly pulled back into the real world by Gaz’s voice. He had been organizing the nutrient bars and electrolyte bottles in your room while you sat and dissociated to the sound of rustling paper bags.

You stare at his furrowed brows and worried eyes for a moment before averting your gaze with a nod. “Yeah.”

The carpet under your feet has never looked quite so interesting before.

Gaz moves to sit next to you on the bed, sinking down onto the mattress with a sigh. “Nervous?”

You nod in response, clutching the strawberry pillow in your arms tighter against your chest.

“You’ll be alright.” Gaz says, his hand warm as it presses against your back. “I’m gonna take good care of you, yeah? Both you and Price. I’ll be right outside that door, and I’ll be in and out too. Dr. Keller’s ready in case something happens, but I don’t think anything will.” He wraps his arm around you, pulling you close against him. “You’re in good hands.”

“There’s no going back after this.” You say, leaning into his side.

“No, I don’t think any of us would want to anyway.” He smiles down at your surprised face. “What? I thought that was obvious. We all want you as part of our pack. You are part of the pack already, at least in every way but officially. None of us would trade you for anything.”

Your eyes fill with tears at his words. You know it’s just the stress and the hormones and the impending heat that could start at any time, but his words reach some deep part of you that was worried that they were all faking, that they all actually hated you. His words calm you a bit, easing away that stress and fear that you’ve been carrying for the last almost six weeks.

“Come now, none of that.” Gaz says, wiping the tear that trails down your cheek. “Can’t afford getting dehydrated now.”

You can’t help but laugh, even though you know he’s right. You’ve had so much liquid over the last couple days you feel as though you might burst at any second. It was necessary, considering the amount of fluid you were about to lose.

Gaz leans down, kissing all over your face. You giggle, falling back on your bed to try and escape, but he follows you, continuing to plant little kisses all over your face and neck.

“Kyle!” You shriek, giggling as his kisses tickle your skin.

He pauses, leaning up so you’re eye to eye, a grin on his face. “You called me Kyle.”

“That is your name, isn’t it?” You say, blinking up at him.

“Yeah.” He chuckles. “You can call me Kyle as much as you’d like, love.” He says as he leans down, pressing his lips to yours.

You wrap your arms around his neck, holding him in place as you kiss him back. His arm snakes beneath you, pressing you tightly against his chest. He groans quietly into your lips, body taught against yours. You can feel every part of him, the muscles under his shirt, the strength of his thighs. Your head is spinning, and you know it’s mostly due to your impending heat.

You let out a quiet whine as his lips leave yours, trailing down your neck to your shoulder. He leaves a scalding kiss over your scent gland, nipping playfully at the sensitive skin.

“Can’t wait to see the mark,” He murmurs against your skin, a quiet whimper leaving your lips as your body begins to warm a little. “When Price claims you, makes you his.”

“Fuck.” You breathe, a shudder running through your whole body.

Kyle chuckles, sucking a mark on your collarbone. “You won’t be just his, though, huh? Gonna be ours.”

You let out a whine at his words, your fingers trailing up the back of his neck. He lets out a quiet groan, his body shuddering as you tease the sensitive skin. You feel lightheaded and dizzy from the rapidly shifting hormones of your pre-heat. You’re very close to the start. Any day now you could wake in a sweat with an insatiable ache between your thighs. You're like a ticking time bomb, but neither of the demolition experts you now live with can disarm you.

If only it could be so easy.

Kyle presses one last kiss to your lips before he pulls back, smiling down at you. “You’ll be alright. I’ll make sure of it.”

You can’t help but believe him, especially with those big brown eyes staring down at you.

It’s sweltering. A fire has started beneath your skin, flames licking your veins, your very cells scorching in the fiery inferno that has overtaken you. An arid desert has bloomed in your mouth, your tongue heavy and sticky. Sweat has slicked your skin, consciousness only bringing awareness to the dampness of your sheets and pajamas.

It also brings awareness to the pain.

There’s an intense ache between your legs, your pelvis cramping. Slick has coated your thighs, soaking through your pajama pants, the fabric clinging to your skin. It’s too much, the sensations of your pajamas and the weight of the blankets nearly driving you to insanity. You need to be bare. It’s too hot and the drag of the fabric across your skin makes you want to cry.

Not to mention the intense need burning through you.

The mattress protector crinkles as you shift on the bed, every movement taking an excess amount of energy as you attempt to tug your shirt off with fumbling fingers. It’s like you’re moving in slow motion, your arms heavy and sluggish as you peel the fabric from your sticky skin, letting it fall to the floor. You lay there exhausted, body twitching as your temperature begins to spike. You blindly reach out, fingers trembling as they grasp at your phone. Your eyes are bleary as you blink rapidly at the too bright screen. You fumble with clumsy fingers on the screen, dialing the first number you see, not caring who it is.

“Hello?”

You let out a quiet whine at the rough voice, thick with sleep. You can’t get your mouth to move, to form any words as you lay there pathetically, half undressed and soaked in sweat and slick. There’s an ache between your thighs, pulsing in time with your heart. Your free hand fumbles with your waistband, desperate to try and get your pants down, to remove the feeling of your underwear sticking to your slick folds.

“Help.” You manage a single word, not even sure it was intelligible. You let out a frustrated whimper, your body not cooperating to lift your hips so you can pull down your pants.

A moment of silence passes before you get a response. “Fuck, be right there, love.”

The line clicks, and a moment later a door is opening down the hall. You’re silently grateful you hadn’t locked your door last night, as there was no way you would be able to get out of bed and make it across the floor. It opens just enough for the figure to slip in before he closes it, not wanting to let your scent freely flow down the hallway.

The light of the lamp on your nightstand accosts your eyes as it’s turned on, making you squint. You don’t miss the way Kyle’s nose crinkles for a moment as he catches the sickly sweet, overwhelming aroma of your scent as it pours from your body. His hand is cool against your forehead as he brushes the stray strands of hair sticking to your skin back. Johnny had braided it last night at least to try and keep it out of the way.

“Easy.” He says quietly, shushing you as you whimper in need.

You let out a whine as Kyle pushes the blankets out of the way. You’re incapable of caring that you’re half naked in front of him for the first time, and he pays it no mind. You tug uselessly at your pajama pants again, letting out a frustrated whine as you fail to shimmy them down your legs again. Kyle bats your hands away, slipping his fingers under the waistband and tugging the pants down your legs. You sigh in relief as the fabric is pulled away from your skin, a shiver running through you as the cool air hits your slicked folds.

Kyle gathers your clothes, adding them into the bag of things that would need to be washed as soon as your heat is over before he returns to your side.

“I need you to drink something for me, then I’ll go get Price, alright?” He says, kneeling down next to the bed as he grabs the electrolyte drink from your nightstand.

You flop against his chest as he slips an arm around you, helping prop you up. Your face presses into his neck, inhaling deeply. A whine of disappointment leaves your lips as you realize he’s not what you need, your omega dissatisfied with the scent of beta emanating from him.

“I know.” He says, easing you away from his neck. “Just drink this first and then you can have your alpha.”

“Alpha.” You whimper, leaning against Kyle’s chest.

He helps you drink some of the sweet liquid, and you gulp it down, relieved as it eases some of the dryness in your mouth. He lets you drink half of the bottle before he pulls it away, setting it on the nightstand.

“Good girl.” He praises you, helping you lay back down against your pillow. “I’ll go get Price. I’ll get your alpha.”

You hum contently at the promise of what’s coming, your omega practically screaming for her alpha, for some relief.

Kyle slips back out the door, your head buzzing as the intense arousal and need burning within you gets stronger. Your pussy is pulsing, slick dribbling out of you as the need to mate takes over. The primordial instinct to reproduce is strong, your omega clawing at your mind, screaming to be bred, screaming to be bred, to carry pups. You need your alpha. You need his knot.

You roll onto your stomach, pressing your hips into the mattress. You need something, anything to ease the aching pulse in your body. You begin to rut against the sheets, dragging your clit against the rough fabric. You let out a quiet whine as the friction sends pleasure shooting through you, a slight relief from the pain of your intense arousal.

The door opens, your head shooting up as the heavy scent of alpha washes over you. Your eyes dilate, a shudder traveling from your head to your toes as the familiar scent of damp earth laced with the musk of arousal invades your senses. You let out another whine as John approaches the bed, your hips still rutting desperately against the sheets. You look utterly ruined, wide eyed and sweat-slicked, panting like an animal in heat.

You are an animal in heat.

“Look at you.” John mumbles, his voice rumbling deep in his chest. He stands over you, watching the desperate movements of your hips for a moment. “Needy little thing.” He teases, setting his phone on your nightstand before tugging his shirt over his head.

You watch as every inch of skin is revealed to you, lips parting as you take him in. The strength of his muscles, the softness of his stomach. You want to lick every inch of him. You want to roll around in his scent, cover yourself in his essence, mark every part of your body with him.

You arch into his touch as he drags a hand down your back, rough fingers following the line of your spine. You press your ass into his hand as he passes over it, fingers tugging your thighs apart. He groans again as a wave of your thick, sweet scent washes over him.

“Let me see you.” He growls, sweatpants hitting the floor.

You hear him, but you’re too busy staring at him in awe. More slick slips out of you at the sight of his cock, red and angry and painfully hard already. You can almost swear it’s pulsing in time with your pussy. A harsh gasp is pulled from your throat as he brings his hand down across your ass, the sound of skin striking skin loud enough to pull you back to reality.

“I said, present for your alpha.” He says, the rough rumble of his inner alpha coating the edges of his voice.

You whimper in response, scrambling up onto your hands and knees like a good omega for him as he kneels on the bed behind you.

“Good girl.” He rumbles, a pleased whine leaving your lips at his praise.

You push back into his hands as he cups your ass, his hand smoothing over the burning spot on the cheek he’d slapped. You can’t feel the pain from it, far too lost in your heat-riddled brain to register anything but the need pulsing between your thighs and the alpha staring at your soaked pussy. Thumbs part your folds, slick dribbling onto the sheets as he stares at your pussy.

“So fucking slick for me.” He groans, dragging a thumb along your slit.

“For you alpha!” You gasp, pressing back harder against his hands.

A low growl rumbles in his chest as he drags his thumb through your folds again, pressing the digit against your clit. Your gasp is broken by a whimper, your clit already sensitive from you humping against your bed like a needy pup. You bend your top half down, relaxing against the mattress as you grind back against his hand. He lets you, keeping his hand still as he lets you work yourself to pleasure on your own.

“Please! Please!” You beg, mind going numb with pleasure as his thumb brushes your clit with every rock of your hips. Your legs are already shaking, body trembling as the pleasure starts to build and build, the promise of relief coming at the hands of your alpha.

“Eager little thing,” He rumbles, his breath fanning across your folds.

You moan as his tongue drags along your slit, tasting your slick. Your fingers sink into the sheets, holding on as his tongue prods your entrance, his mouth slurping at the slick dripping from you. It’s obscene, but either of you care, both of you too lost in your need.

Your knees nearly give out, your pussy clenching around his tongue as he applies more pressure against your clit, drawing slow circles with his thumb. He’s groaning against you, the quiet sound rumbling deep in his chest. He’s losing his own sanity, his alpha taking over as your heat triggers his rut instincts. His alpha has to be screaming as much as your omega is to mate.

Your orgasm hits you suddenly, washing over you with a power that almost makes you black out. Slick spills out of you as your pussy flutters, soaking John’s face and beard in your juices. He’s relentless, not giving you even a second as he continues to fuck you with his tongue as his thumb rubs tight circles on your clit. Your legs are shaking, eyes rolling as the pleasure continues to build. Despite your orgasm, it’s not enough. Your brain knows it and your body knows it. You need a knot before you’ll be able to relax, before the pain and the need fades enough for your brain to relax.

Even then, it will only be for a moment.

“Alpha!” You whine, pushing back against his face, seeking out more.

John growls against your pussy, the sound vibrating into your very soul. You let out a whimper in response, clutching at the sheets desperately. He pulls away from your pussy, licking his lips. You wish you could see him, the way his face shines with your slick, his beard soaked with your release. He licks his lips, savoring every last taste of you he can get as he sinks his fingers into you.

You clamp down around the thick digits, a groan leaving his lips as you squeeze around him. You’re desperate for another orgasm, another chance at relief from the blazing inferno under your skin, the painful need still pulsing in your pelvis.

“Please, alpha!” You whine, bucking back against his hand. “Hurts.”

He shushes you, continuing to fuck you with his fingers. The wet squelch of your pussy is loud in the small room, obscene and depraved, but you cannot bring yourself to care who might be able to hear as another orgasm rushes through your body. You whine in pleasure as slick dribbles out around his fingers, forced out by the fluttering of your walls. You can’t stop, don’t stop, as you continue to rock back against him. He watches you, holding his hand still as you fuck yourself on his fingers. You’re still desperate for more, still needing the one thing he won’t give you yet.

He pulls his fingers from you, making you whimper at the sudden emptiness. Your pussy is still pulsing with the aftershocks of your orgasm, still trying to clench around nothing. John curses as he drags his fingers through your folds, spreading your slick and your release across the sensitive skin.

“Tell me what you need.” He rasps, the edges of his voice harsh as his alpha begins to take over.

“Need your knot, alpha.” You whine, pushing your hips back, searching for anything that might offer some more relief. “Please.”

He lets out a pleased rumble, shifting behind you. You bite your lip in anticipation and excitement, your body twitching as his rough hands smooth over the skin of your hips. His touch is electric, amplified by the sensitivity brought on by your heat. You want to feel him against you, you want to feel him inside of you. You need him, every fiber of your being, every cell in your body reaching out to him, inviting him in.

A quiet mewl escapes you as he drags the head of his cock through your folds, gathering your slick on his hard length. Your entire body flutters in anticipation as he pushes against your entrance, meeting no resistance as he presses into you. Your body aids him, relaxing around him as it welcomes the intrusion. There’s no pain, no discomfort as he stretches you open, aided by the copious slick that still seeps out around his cock. You practically shudder in relief as you finally get what you want, what you need.

Your alpha’s cock inside you.

His grip is tight on your hips as he begins to move, rocking his own hips as he presses deeper into you. He shifts his legs around yours, pressing himself closer until he’s flush against your ass. You can feel him deep inside you, and you’re almost certain you could see it if you looked. You brace yourself against the bed, instinct taking over as you begin to move with him, rocking back to meet his thrusts. It’s lewd, the sound of skin slapping skin as he sets an almost frantic pace, sharp thrusts accentuating the wet squelch of your pussy around him, and the sound of his hips meeting your ass.

His fingers dig into your hips almost to the point of pain, but you don’t care. You’re far too lost in your instincts, and the pleasure, to care much about anything. The hormones and endorphins block it out, only one thought on your mind, playing on repeat.

Knot knot knot knot.

You moan loudly as Price ruts into you, not caring who might hear, or who can hear. Price moans and growls, the sweetness of your scent blocking out all thoughts except how much he needs to breed you, how much he needs to be a good alpha and take care of his omega.

You just want to be a good omega for your alpha.

You cum again with a cry, pussy fluttering around his cock as more slick dribbles out of you, soaking the sheets below you. John doesn’t stop, save for a slight falter of his thrusts as you squeeze around him tightly, your pussy trying to milk his own orgasm from him. Your body is shaking, his hands the only thing keeping your hips upright as more and more pleasure continues to build despite now three orgasms that have rocked through you.

You need him to cum, you need him to fill you up with his knot. You need to feel the warmth of his seed inside you, the heaviness of it as it fills you. Drool begins to pool on the sheets below your face, adding to the mix of fluids soaked into your already damp sheets. John’s pace never falters, even as sweat begins to build on his brow, sliding down the sides of his face. You want to lick it, follow the trail of salty liquid as it falls down his neck and onto his chest.

Sweat drips from your own skin as another orgasm begins to build. You can tell John is close too as his grip tightens on your hips, the pain registering just for a moment at the back of your mind. You’ll forget it by the time your heat ends, the momentary pull to awareness lost in the haze of mindless pleasure and a need to mate.

“C’mon.” John growls, his hand wrapping around the back of your neck. “Give it to me.”

You let out a whine, knowing what it is he wants, what it is you need as you push yourself back up onto shaking arms, the adrenaline the only thing giving you the strength to move. John moves your braids to the other side of your neck, his chest pressing against your back. It changes the angle of his thrusts as he grinds against you, the swelling at the base of his cock catching on your walls as he continues to thrust deeply into you.

“Please,” You whimper, bearing your neck to him as he kisses along the line of your shoulder. “Please alpha. Wanna be yours.” You whimper, arching into him in an attempt to get closer as his teeth drag across your skin.

“My good omega.” He growls, teeth nipping at the sensitive skin right next to your scent gland at the junction of your neck and shoulder. “My good girl. Gonna take my knot like a good omega? Let me fill you up with pups as I make you mine?”

You let out a high pitched whine at his words, trying to press your neck closer to his mouth. “Please, alpha! Please! Wanna be a good omega!”

He curses under his breath, his arm wrapping around your body to hold you up. His knot presses into you, stretching you open as it continues to swell until he’s locked inside you. You cum around his knot at the sensation of being filled so completely, his hips continuing to grind against you as he chases his own orgasm.

You nearly black out as his teeth sink into your skin, the pinch lasting only for a second before pleasure rushes through you. You let out a loud, high-pitched sound as he claims you, marking you as his forever. Another, sudden orgasm slams into you, his arm holding you still as you try to writhe on his knot. He growls into your skin as he stills, hips jerking against your ass as he cums inside you.

Your arms give out as he releases your shoulder, blood dripping onto the sheets below you. Your head is spinning as he drags his tongue across the raised skin, cleaning the mark he’s left on you.

He shushes you as you let out little whimpers and whines, gently easing your body so you’re laying flat against the bed. “Easy, that’s my good girl.” He praises you, pressing gentle kisses against your neck. “My good omega. Take my knot so well.”

Your vision slowly fades to darkness as exhaustion takes over, a small smile tugging at your lips from his praise.

His eyes are dark and glazed as he stares up at you, mouth parted as he breathes heavily. Your head is thrown back, the sweetest little moans and whimpers leaving your lips as you bounce on his cock. His hands hold your hips, far too tight to be comfortable against your sweat-soaked skin as he guides your movements, but you offer no complaint. His thighs are soaked with your slick and a mix of fluids that seems to endlessly drip from you. Your own thighs are shaking around him, exhaustion prevalent in your sloppy movements. You’re close, eyes fluttering as your grip tightens on his shoulders. Your nails bite into his skin but he doesn’t care. He can’t feel much of anything but pleasure at the moment.

He guides you through your orgasm as it rocks through you, your body shuddering around him. His hips press up against yours as he reaches his own end, spilling into you as his knot locks into place, connecting you two once again. He doesn’t know how long it’s been, nor does he care. All he wants is to be inside you, fucking his seed into you until you’re swollen with it. He stares down at where you’re connected for a moment, your pussy spread open around his knot.

He guides you against his chest as your body gives out, the haze of his instincts lifting just momentarily. His body aches, soreness settling in as his mind clears. You lick at his throat, tasting his sweat-slicked skin. Sweet little whimpers and whines leave your lips as you rest against him, completely boneless and at his mercy.

He reaches over to the nightstand, wrapping an arm around you to hold you still so he doesn’t tug on the knot as he grabs the bottle of electrolytes. He unscrews the cap, gently easing you back. You’re both still breathing heavily as he cradles the back of your head with one hand, helping you drink the electrolytes. You gulp it down even in your exhausted state, your body recognizing its need for sustenance.

He drinks the rest after you finish, tossing the bottle onto the floor with the others. He picks up one of the nutrient bars, peeling the wrapper off before he begins to eat, feeding you bites of it as he does. You’re half asleep, chewing slowly as you rest against his chest, body still trembling slightly from the aftershocks of another of what’s now a countless number of orgasms.

He gives you the last little bit of the bar before he relaxes back against the headboard, keeping his arms wrapped tight around you. The skin on your shoulder is still angry and slightly swollen from his claiming bite. It doesn’t help that he’s sunk his teeth into that spot twice now since he first claimed you.

He swells with pride upon seeing it, the proof that you’re now his, a warning to others not to mess with you. It’s a slight weight off his shoulders. He has to worry less about someone trying something. Some haughty, cocksure alpha getting it through his head that he wants what he can’t have, that he can just take what’s not his. A low growl rumbles through his chest at the thought.

He shushes you as you stir in response to the warning growl, a purr rumbling through his chest as he eases you back into a relaxed state. His good little omega, his sweet little omega, taking his knot so well.

You make a quiet noise as he twitches inside you, the feeling of being enveloped in your tight heat almost like heaven. He closes his eyes, calming his inner alpha. He knows you need to rest. You need a little break before you start up again, before your heat continues to ravage you.

Before he continues to ravage you.

Taglist:

@bobaprint @ashy-kit @anunintentionalwriter @mockerycrow @hayleybarnesx @protokosmonaut @fruitymoonbeams-blog @blue-blue0 @hindi-si-ikay @thatonepupkai @redwites @kattiieee @141trash @lothiriel9 @dillybuggg @beebeechaos @konigsmissedbeltloop @kaoyamamegami @idkkkkkkk8363 @wallwriterstuff @smile-child-13 @anomiatartle @dangerkittenclaws @bless-my-demons @mystic60 @evolutionarry @red-hydra @lunaetiicsaystuff @linaangel @codsunshine @thriving-n-jiving @slayerx147 @ferns-fics @spicyspicyliving @cityoffallencrows @ttsbaby01 @heeheehoohoohahahihi @sleepyoriana @ihatethinkingofnames10 @cassiecasluciluce @darling006 @sheep-from-rad @ohgodthebogisback @willow-sages @scythemood @daniblogs164 @mirzamsaiph

#call of duty #call of duty fic #alpha/beta/omega dynamics #a/b/o #omegaverse #captain price x reader #price x reader #kyle gaz garrick x reader #kyle garrick x reader #john mactavish x reader #soap x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x reader #x reader

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wherewolf · 1 year

Text

the responses i’ve seen to shiv’s ending seem very quick to write her off as just another sad victim of the cycle, which isn’t without truth BUT!!! that is not even remotely the summation of shiv’s story.

i don’t think she votes yes to “save kendall” or to try to finally set her brothers free. and i don’t think her main concern was that ken was becoming their dad. she absolutely noticed and didn’t love it, but that was not her motivation in betraying him. she was thinking about herself.

it’s tempting to make a martyr out of her as she is the only female child and we see her suffer the onslaught of misogyny that comes with that. but to make her into a saintlike figure who got beat takes away the power and intelligence behind her decision.

at this point she’s stuck between two non ideal choices, but she recognizes that they have accidentally made her the single most important player in the game. because while she can’t have the outcome she’d prefer, she has the power to decide the fates of everyone else. the written off lone woman now holds in her hands the fate of every man in her life.

so she thinks about the long term benefits of both options and realizes that one side leaves her completely without any leverage.

her brothers have proven to her multiple times in the last few days alone that they will cut her out and walk all over her the first chance they get. siding with them leaves her nothing to bargain with. she would just have to hope that ken would actually take care of her. and that level of vulnerability is not only unacceptable to her, it’s stupid. and shiv fuckin roy is not stupid.

so she thinks about the other side and about what she actually wants for her life. and against her better judgment, it’s becomes unfortunately clear that she wants tom. the way she wants him is not altogether loving or even good but it is necessary to her. she sees relationships as having winners and losers and she chose this man specifically so that she could be confident in her ability to win. except now he’s grown some balls and made himself unavailable to her.

she may not like the way her husband is evolving but she already placed her bets on him, so she’s sure as hell not losing to him now. there’s also a part of her that feels intrigued by this new man she’s married to. it’s interesting to have a sparring partner in him instead of having to looking for excitement outside of their marriage.

so for maybe the first time ever, she processes what tom has said to her and thinks about what he actually wants.

he needs her to prove that she cares. he needs to know that she is capable of sacrifice. if she can’t find it within herself to do this for him, then she will lose him, and by extension, she will lose.

siding with tom gives her the opportunity to once and for all make a grand-stand gesture of love, but more importantly, it creates leverage for her. never again will he be able to hold the moral high ground over her head. never again can he say she doesn’t love him. never again can he call her selfish or uncaring. above all, he can never betray her again, because she just removed all of his moral justification for turning on her. he doesn’t realize it yet, but she’s just taken back all the power in their relationship. just in a more subtle way than she’s used to operating.

and just like that, she has the ceo of a multi billion dollar company in her pocket, while situating herself as the only descendant of logan roy to still be playing the game, having removed her brothers from the equation permanently. she may still be far from the top but she’s creating a path for herself to climb.

so yes, she’ll let tom play king for a day, and she’ll have his baby and say “congratulations,” and play the gracious wife, but tomorrow is a new day with lots of room to maneuver. and when her husband puts out his hand, she’ll place her own on top. but she won’t grasp it because she doesn’t need to.

#🐺#shivy’s gonna be just fine #okay this ended up being a very long post but #i feel like someone needed to point out her wins #also i’m fully aware that remaining in the toxic world of the family business is not a win rly but #i think her ending is being interpreted as powerlessness #which it is NOT #she chose her spot. she’s calling shots #she may not have won today but she sure as hell didn’t lose #let’s not work so hard to sanctify her that we remove everything about her that makes her such a brilliant character #succession #shiv roy #siobhan roy #scn #tv

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ugotcooneycrossed · 7 months

Text

keep pretending pretty girl • alessia russo

pt2: let you break my heart again

w/c: ~1.4k

alessia is adamant that shes straight, she just likes kissing you sometimes, and she just likes holding your hand, and she only likes it when you talk to her

a/n: OBVIOUSLY based off another song from the queen renee rapp

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“i love you.”

alessia is drunk- her cheeks are flushed, and her speech is slightly slurred, she’s teetering on the edge of completely falling over, the only thing stopping her is the door she’s leaning on.

“no like- seriously, i love, love you.”

you send her a small, tight-lipped smile- your head thumping back against the mirror of the bathroom counter you’re sat on.

it’s cramped in the small room- there’s only so many things you can look at to avoid staring into alessia’s eyes.

still, you avert your eyes from hers nodding your head. gripping the cup in your hands tighter as she inches closer to you.

a tight coil snakes its way into your chest and you sigh heavily.

“i love you too less.”

it’s not a lie- far from it in fact, you love her, you have since you were seventeen.

and alessia loves you too, only in private- when no one’s looking, stealing kisses from you late at night, and leaving you as soon as the sun comes up again.

drunken confessions, promises, and pleas- swearing to love you- and only you.

it’s all in vain though, as soon as the alcohol wears off and her phone pings with a new text from her boyfriend- she’s off without another word.

“i’m going to kiss you now.”

she falls into you- her hands finding themselves on top of your thighs to balance herself, her face inches away from you.

“less… you’ve got a boyf-“

and suddenly- all you can taste is the lingering tequila on her lips, all you can smell is her strawberry perfume, and all you can feel are her hands gripping your thighs tighter.

and you kiss her back again- cause maybe you’re a little drunk too, and maybe, no matter how much you try to stop yourself, you’re pathetic, and you love alessia.

she pulls away suddenly- her lips a little swollen and a dazed look in her eyes, her eyebrow furrows in concentration before a huge grin spreads across her face.

“oh my gosh- i love this song!”

she grabs your hand- dragging you off the counter and out the bathroom.

the flat is cramped with people- a pre-season party thrown to celebrate the start of the new season.

and everyone is way too drunk and way too far gone to notice the way alessia keeps herself attached to you.

she’s swaying with you- despite the fast pace of the song, she has you wrapped up in her arms and rocks you slowly.

“less i think it’s time for you to go home.”

“but I want to stay with you- i love you.”

she’s looking into your eyes now- genuine and raw, but you know how this will go.

she’ll come back with you.

she’ll kiss you a little more.

then, she’ll fall asleep in your bed- you’ll take the couch of course.

and then; you’ll wake up to the sound of your flat door closing, the first rays of the sun filtering through the cracks in your blinds.

you know it’s a losing battle trying to find a way to say no to her.

“okay- come on, let’s get back to mine”

like always you wake up just as the door closes- flopping back onto the couch with a defeated sigh.

now you know the next part will go a little something like this;

she’ll ignore you for a few days.

she’ll make a big deal of missing her boyfriend.

she’ll be on the phone to him all the time.

then, be right by your side like nothing’s happened.

she’ll invite you to hang- and you do, because of course, you can’t say no to her.

and you’ll end up third wheeling.

a vicious cycle you can’t seem to drag yourself out of.

it started when you followed her to UNC you think- young, dumb, naïve- and absolutely infatuate with your best friend.

best friends- who never wanted to be apart, you both turned down pro contracts to go to the US. attached at the hip, co-captains for the tar heels, you did practically everything together.

you were there for her first boyfriend, and consequently her first heartbreak.

as her best friend though.

that’s all you were- and you were okay with that, even if seeing her talk to anyone else brought a bitter taste to your mouth.

and so maybe, one night, she had a little too much to drink- and she kissed you, right on the lips.

“i think i like girls but shhhhh! you can’t tell anyone.”

she whispers it to you- before passing out on your bed.

and the next day when she wakes up- she doesn’t remember the kiss, or she wants to forget it. you wouldn’t bring it up either way.

but then it happens again, and again, and again.

and you’re sucked into an endless loop of alessia kissing you, ignoring you, then acting like nothing happened- only to kiss you again.

then, she’s off signing with united, and you with arsenal- and it stops.

then when the national team calls both of you up- it starts again.

now alessia is with arsenal- and you’re completely fucked.

you’re dead tired, and quiet when you show up to training a couple days after the party- unusual on any normal day, but routine after whatever it is, that happens with alessia.

the blonde girl looks up at you from her cubby when you walk into the room- but just as quickly averts her eyes, picking up her phone and slipping out the room without a second thought.

you roll your eyes at her.

you can almost predict exactly what is happening on the other side of the door.

lotte- who was there to witness the mess you were every day after alessia kissed you at UNC, nudges you.

“you know- you can like, i don’t know, talk to other girls?”

“shut up lotte.”

“i’m just saying.”

she holds her hands up in defence- but the sympathetic smile never leaves her face.

“i’ve tried- don’t you think i have?”

cause you have- really.

not that you remember their names, or their faces.

cause all you really remember from them is that their lips weren’t nearly as nice as alessias, their hands weren’t as soft, and they didn’t know where to kiss you to leave you weak in the knees.

“let me set you up?”

narrowing your eyes at her you go to protest- but she interrupts you before you can speak.

“just try at least, take your mind off of her for one night.”

you arrive earlier than lotte told you to- an excuse to start drinking to calm your nerves.

the restaurant is nice- definitely somewhere for a couple to go, dim lighting and light music floating through the room.

lotte’s friend shows up when you’re already a little tipsy- sitting across from you and smiling from across the table. the conversation between you two is boring, and you stopped listening a while ago.

you order another drink, and then another- then your vision is spinning and lotte’s friend harley, or hayley, or- well you don’t exactly remember her name, ‘cause she’s starting to look a little like alessia, and you’re one more shot away from making a bad decision.

“hey (y/n)- what’re you doing here?”

and she’s starting to sound like her too?

you blink- lotte’s friend coming into focus in front of you and alessia is standing by your table.

“less?”

she’s staring at you now- eyebrows raised and nodding to the girl across from you.

you try to wrack your brain for the name- but alessia is looking a little too good right now and you’re mouth has gone a little dry.

“im lotte’s friend- grace.”

alessia hums at that- her eyes still not leaving yours.

“you are…”

grace- you now remember, questions alessia.

“alessia.”

“great- can i get back to my date now alessia.”

alessia’s eyes still haven’t left yours- she barely acknowledges your date and the atmosphere between you three is tense, you sink down into your seat, eyes flickering between the two, trying to catch your breath.

“sure thing.”

alessia disappears- slipping away and back to what you assume is her boyfriend.

whatever her name is goes back to speaking but you can’t focus on anything.

cause alessia is here.

alessia is here- and you’re supposed to be forgetting her.

but of course- as fate would have it, the blonde texts you a moment later.

lessi to ‘you’

-> bathroom in 5??

#alessia russo x reader #alessia russo imagine #woso x reader #woso imagine #woso

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lure-of-writing · 2 months

Text

Kick your ass

Note: Hi everybody long time no see! I would assume that is doesn't come as a surprise when I say being a flight attendant leaves no room for writing much less doing anything else but sleeping but here we are after what I'm sure can be counted as forever. Anyways I feel like this story is when your partner just isn't getting it right and it's driving you crazy and you get a little ( or a lot) sassy. I'm so happy to have finally written something in so long and I hope you love it!

Word count-2.3K

Warnings- none unless you count cussing

Summary: Lately all your mate does is piss you off. And don't get it wrong you love him but you are more than ready to kick his ass.

You love Azriel with all of your heart, your whole being if you're being completely honest but lately he has done nothing but piss you off. It first started with him going on a mission during the middle of your cycle. Since the moment you knew Azirel was your mate you gave clear explicit instructions that Azriel was to be no more than five feet away from you during that time of the year unless it was for something of the utmost importance and could not be handled by anyone else. Imagine your surprise when he started grabbing his leather clothing after he had made you breakfast and had gotten you comfortable in your bed that could fit three grown Illyrian men.

“And just where do you think you're going?” Azriel could feel like distaste dripping off of your words and hitting him in the back as he was faced away from you. It was no secret that Azriel loved you more than life itself and would do absolutely anything to keep you safe and happy but when you were on your period you could be a handful and more often than not you tested his never ending patience until you actually found the end of its supply. With a slow release of his breath he turns around to find you perched on the edge of the bed throwing an angry glare in his direction. “Listen baby” the shadowsinger slowly approached you like you were a wild animal ready to strike at any moment and honestly that comparison isn’t too far off with the way you look like you're ready to rip his head off of his shoulders. “You know I wouldn’t go unless I had to, yeah?” he kneels before you gently rubbing comforting circles on your bare thigh while giving you a soft smile reserved for only you. “Is the information you retrieve from this mission of that great value?” he watched as you paused waiting for the answer that both he and you already knew. “Is there no one else beneath you who could do it instead?” And while yes there were people beneath him that could handle this task, Azriel is a perfectionist and would like to make sure things get done right. “Is it so important that you must leave your mate during their cycle knowing the excruciating pain I endure? It's so important you must put this before your mate?”

Azriel knew this conversation was a losing battle on his end but he also knew if he would like to be able to sleep next to you tonight that he must offer something to make up for it. “No my love, there isn’t anyone else who can handle this as they are all busy at the moment but don’t worry I will be back before dinner.” Even as you glowered down at him all the shadowsinger could think about was two things. One, he is definitely in trouble and two, how stunning you look. “I don’t care if no one else can do it, get that brute of your brother to handle it.” You waved your hand in a dismissive way as if to send Cassian on this mission yourself and Azriel couldn’t help but lay his head on your legs and laugh and your attitude.

The next time Azriel made you mad was during a family dinner with the inner circle. At first with all the new people, family dinners were a little awkward and unbearable mostly due to Cassians pinning over Nesta and her constant blatant rejection but also because of the middle sister's fascination with your mate. Did she know he was your mate? Yes. Did that stop her from having a crush? Absolutely not.

As you were getting ready to head down to Feyres and Rhysands new house you had made it clear he needed to put his foot down and tell Elain he was not and would never be interested in a relationship with her otherwise you would handle it yourself and Azriel knew that meant you would become your own nasiter version of Nesta and you would tear her down until she couldn’t even look you in the eyes. It may not be the best way to handle her crush but until Azriel when it came to dealing with people who had a crush on him you tended to leave your manners at the door.

Everything was going well at the river house until you walked into the dinning room with Amren and spot your mate seated next to Elain on one side and Mor on the other side. The whole group could feel the shift in the temperature as it dropped and you gave a cold and pointed stare to your mate. Possessing the same powers as Rhysand you barged into his mind “What the hell is this?” without responding he gently shakes his head in a not right here manner and pleading with his eye for you to just let this go. Silently you take your seat across the table from him and sit next to your high lady and Amren. For the rest of the dinner you say nothing as your pin Azriel to his seat as your seething anger radiates off of you and hits him like a tidal wave over and over again never once giving him a break.

“Y/n” Azriel had waited until after you had taken your bath and done your fifteen step skin and body care route and had gotten into bed with your current book you picked to read before approaching you. He gently sat down on the bed next to your legs and hopped you don;t make him sleep on the couch tonight. “I know you're upset with what happened at dinner but it just happened one minute I was talking with Mor and the next Elain was ushering us all in to eat dinner and she just happened to sit next to me.” As he gave his explanation of the night's events you had closed your book and laid it in your lap and nodded silently in understanding waiting for your mate to be done talking. “Is that so?” you asked in a thoughtful way. Now Azriel has been with you long enough to know that tone of voice and that statement should strike the fear of every god into him and it definitely did. “Yes, I promise that's what happened.” Once again you nodded in understanding before tilting your head to the side with a confused look on your face. “So if that's all that happened then why would Elain feel comfortable sitting next to you knowing that you have a mate who cannot stand her crush on you? And didn’t I tell you to make sure Elain knew in no uncertain terms that her fantasy of having a relationship with you was nothing more than a fantasy and if she tried I would kill her?” Azriels heart dropped to his stomach as he listened to you talk, he had known that there was something he needed to do but as soon as he entered the house Cassian gave him a cup of a mysterious alcohol and Rhysand had beckoned him over to fill him in on the status of a mission one of his spies were on. And before he knew it Morrgian had whisked him away to talk about her journey on the continent and the information she had obtained while there and the next thing he knew he was sat between the girl he used to have a crush on and the girl who currently has a crush on him. Candidly he knew he was fucked.

“Let's go with your version of events like you said they happened shall we? I am going to assume you got too busy with everyone to tell Elain to knock off her childish behavior, which you would have done in a much nicer way because you are you. Then why didn’t you say anything to her when I walked in or better yet why didn’t you get up to sit next to me instead?” As a professional interrogator your mate knew you had just walked him into a trap and for a split second he wondered why you didn’t have his job instead. “Baby you know both of those options would have been rude and probably would have ruined the dinner.” Nodding in fake understanding you inspect your nails giving it a brief second before responding “And you are the shadowsinger of the night court. One of the most feared males in Prythian and you couldn’t muster up the courage to say something to Elain? How ironic is that.” You scoffed and shook your head in a surprised manner and needless to say he ended up sleeping on the couch that night.

The last straw was watching Azriel train the valkyries and watching them not so subtly drool over your mate. You wouldn’t be one to blame them if they had done so in a respectful way but they were bluntly flirting with your mate right in front of you. One thing you loved about Azriel was how secure he was in your relationship. No one could make him look in the direction that wasn’t you, if someone was trying to flirt with him he didn’t register it unless it was you. And normally you wouldn’t have a problem with that except three girls were currently trying to make a pass at him and he had no reaction. Most would take that in a positive way but not you, you wanted him to shut that down the second it started and make a clear line in the sand on what was expected from the student-teacher relationship amongst him and the Valkyries he was training. “Azriel!” You had barely shouted his name from across the training platform on the house of wind but it felt as if you had. He turned around to see you leaned against the wall with your arms crossed over your chest and face set in a scowl while glaring at him. Turing to look at the trainees before him he instructs them on what to do next before quickly making his way to you. “Yes my love?” he asks in such a hushed and concerned tone that you almost forget what you called him over to yell at him about, but over his shoulder you see one of the girls check him out and suddenly you remembered all over again what it was that you needed to speak to him about. “You need to tell your students to stop checking you out and to close their mouths before they start drooling all over themselves.” Your mate's face scrunched in confusion. Azriel may be an excellent observer but when it came to himself not so much. He couldn’t see his own beauty that was hand crafted from the gods themselves, he couldn;t see how his quiet and standoffish personality drew people in, he couldn't see all of the things that you loved about him could all be the reason that other people lust after him.

His shadows gave him a play by play of what his students had been doing while he wasn’t focused on each person in particular and how you had been brewing in your anger in the corner by yourself. As soon as you put on your fighting leathers this morning Azriel knew he was doomed as it was your ritual to fight each other everyday during training but seeing you in the corner pissed that other people had been checking him out brought his demise to a whole nother level. Azriel subtly glanced down at where your arms were crossed over your chest and he thanked the gods for your outfit. “You sound a little upset, my love.” Once more you send him one of your signature pointed looks “Yeah you would be upset also if the roles were reversed.” He shrugs slightly while tilting his head and wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you closer to his body. “You’re not wrong I would be upset because nobody gets to look at you that way unless it's me.” He pulls you even closer to his body until you’re chest to chest with him and he bends down to whisper in your ear. “Beat me in a match and I will make sure they know I’m no one else's but yours. I'll let you claim me anyway you want, hell I’ll even let you do it in front of them if that will make you feel better.” Both you and Azriel knew the game he was playing at but neither of you cared, well him less than you. You pulled away slightly to look up at your mate and see the smirk resting upon his very kissable looking lips “Sounds like a deal to me because I’ve been wanting to kick your ass all week.”

The shadowsinger followed behind you with a laugh and he shook his head in amusement while taking in your figure from behind. He watched as you got into your fighting stance and waited for him to do the same. He held his hand up to signal you to give him a moment. Turning around to look at the Valkyries in training he gathered their attention without saying a word. “I think it's about time to see what the last remaining real valkyrie looks light during a fight and maybe then you can aspire to be a fraction of as good as my beautiful mate is.” He turned back around to see you glowing with confidence, determination and love, but also the want to make sure you won his bet. Gods he knew this was going to lead to some great sex after you kicked his ass and he couldn’t be looking forward to it more.

#acotar imagine #acotar x reader #acotar x you #azriel acotar #azriel x reader #azriel fanfic #azriel imagine #azriel one shot #azriel shadowsinger

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quack-quack-snacks · 4 months

Text

Drowning Without You By My Side

My Navigation and Masterlist

My Sweet Home Masterlist

My Cha Hyun-su Masterlist

Pairing(s): Cha Hyun-su x Fem!Reader Summary: Ever since losing everything, you felt like you were drowning. Trying to end it all wasn't successful when an unknown and unnatural force was hell-bent on stopping you, but when a near-death experience - unintended this time - causes you to tempt Death's grasp, you finally meet the force keeping you bound to the world. Warnings: Season 2 spoilers (slightly)! Slight panic attack, drowning, explicit detail of attempted suicide on the reader's part (The National Suicide and Crisis Hotline is 988. There are so many people who care about you and would love to help you. You are not alone), cutting and bleeding (during the roll calls), Ah-yi being too cute for her own good, and Hyun-su being a fond little cinnamon roll and a great big brother (even if it's only for a scene), no use of (y/n). Word Count: 6,163

Pt 2: Floating Above Those Dark Skies :)

Hyun-su!

You woke up with a start, sweat slickening your skin and causing the slightly ripped t-shirt to stick to your back. It was designed with a band of which you'd never heard the likes of before the apocalypse started. Your breathing was quickened intensely and you wiped your hands over your face, pushing your palms into your eye sockets as you fruitlessly tried to calm your heart rate. It took several minutes of doing every method you knew to stop a panic attack before you were finally able to take a deep breath without it stuttering in your lungs. You swung your legs over the edge of the hammock you had designated as your bed since you first arrived at the stadium all those months ago. To know that you hadn’t seen the boy you once called home in over half a year was a hard pill to swallow. You hated yourself for letting him go.

Hated that you didn’t try harder to follow after him.

Hated that you let the group force you onto the truck with them and head to the safety camp.

It was a never-ending cycle of self-loathing since you’d arrived at the stadium. When you’d found the secret exit leading out of the stuffy concrete walls you were trapped in, you found yourself leaving whenever possible. You couldn't handle the pitiful stares of your fellow Green Home survivors and the eyes of the citizens in the stadium who disliked the woman that protected the “murderer” of the chief’s husband. Although Eun-yoo and you did not really have any sort of relationship in terms of friendship, you had an unspoken agreement to protect and stand up for each other. If not each other, you had no one. The people you each had viewed as the closest to you of anyone had gone missing or even passed on to the next life. You both refused to admit that last thought out loud, though.

Every morning, you would wake up and attend the morning roll call before getting dressed and leaving for the day until you returned just in time for the evening roll call.

Today would be no different.

You dropped your bare feet onto the frigid concrete floor and walked towards the bathroom, suppressing a shiver. The entrance to the bathroom had been taken off after an incident inside of the stadium. It involved none other than yourself and the elder brother of one of the boys who bullied Yeong-su when the two of you got into a fight. You can remember the exact words he had spoken to you after you talked to him about the boy’s behavior.

“The little shit deserves it. Being the little brother of a murderer and the devil’s advocate,” he’d said, referring to Eun-yu and yourself. “I hope he ends up becoming a monster. I even hope I’ll be the one to have the honor of killing him.”

You remember punching him square in the nose as soon as the words left his mouth. He’d flown backward and slammed into the bathroom door, successfully knocking it off the hinges and breaking the flimsy wood in half. You were positively seething at the absolute audacity the man had. Not being satisfied with how he’d fallen, you jumped on top of him and started pounding your fist into his face. You hit him over and over again, undeterred by the few hits he managed to get in, until you were pulled off of him. You started thrashing around violently when you felt hands wrapping around you to pull you off of him until you realized it was Park Chan-young, the young soldier who had been an alibi and friend to you and the rest of the Green Home survivors since you’d first gotten on that truck. A small crowd had gathered around after hearing the commotion and yells coming from the two of you before they all parted to allow Chief Ji in. When she saw you, her confused stare deepened to a glare but she ignored you in favor of transporting the brother you had just fought to the medical room. That was a hell of a day.

The inside of the bathroom was a regular locker room. Not surprising considering it was originally used for the players of the baseball team. The only difference was one of the walls was poorly rebuilt with rocks and bricks by Chief Ji and some of the stadium's residents after it was impacted by the missiles.

Before you had started heading over to the bathroom, you had grabbed your small compact bag of hygiene supplies and brought it with you. Although toothpaste was hard to come by and you had to share the rations the soldiers found with your neighbors, you were able to find some on one of your days out. You brushed your teeth dry, not wanting to use any of the limited water on something like brushing your teeth. This had become something you were used to.

Finally returning to your sleeping space, you didn’t bother changing out of the clothes you slept in and just decided to continue wearing them. The outfit was comfortable yet simple: a pair of oversized off-white sweatpants you had to manually make a drawstring for using a shoestring, and a short-sleeved dark blue shirt. Your shoes were the same ones you wore the first day this monsterization started. They were originally a pristine white you had tried your hardest not to taint, but now they were stained beyond repair from your adventures. You consider yourself lucky you had only bought them a week before the outbreak. They held up well throughout the year you’d spent with them as your sole pair of shoes.

The morning announcement calling for roll call sounded through the silent air of the little enclosed unit you were lucky enough to be given.

Although luck may not have been the true cause. So many people were reluctant to be near you when they slept and complained enough times to the chief that she eventually just set you apart from the rest. Although it was lonely at times, you were thankful for the shred of privacy you had been granted.

Once your shoes had been put on along with your sweater, you calmly walked down the hall toward the place where your assigned group met for roll calls. You arrived just in time to see Yeong-su slap away Jin-ok’s hand when she tried to pull him back from a soldier who was grinning meanly at him. You could see the built-up tears in the boy’s eyes that he desperately was trying to push away and rushed forward. Seeing the reasoning behind his tears, despite the consequences that you knew would ensue, you roughly pushed against the soldier’s back which sent him tumbling forward and his face met the ground floor with a sickening sound. You risked a glance to look back at Yeong-su and Jin-ok. Yeong-su’s arm was bleeding rapidly, seeming obvious that the soldier who cut him too deeply hit an artery. Hopefully, it wasn't a major one. The boy’s lip was quivering as he held back his tears. You could see all the emotions in his eyes: anger, frustration, helplessness, but mainly relief. Relief from you coming in to defend him. You quickly sent a look to Jin-ok and she immediately knew what you meant. She gently took Yeong-su’s hand and this time he didn’t resist as she led them both away from the scene and to their living quarters.

You barely had time to let out a relieved smile before a fist was sent flying into your left cheek, sending your head snapping to the right and you falling back, only barely and painfully catching yourself with your elbows. You looked up at your assailant to see the officer who was tormenting Yeong-su standing above you. His nose was bleeding heavily and if you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought he was beginning the transition period to a monster. He wiped at his nose to no avail and sent you a heavy glare. He leaned down and roughly grabbed your arm, hauling you to your feet and pulling out his knife. You held eye contact even when the blade roughly slashed across your forearm, right over an already existing cut. You praised yourself internally on how you kept your face entirely neutral and how the soldier looked angry and disappointed at your lack of reaction.

You gave him a slight smirk as you held up your bleeding arm for his view, the blood gushing down and covering your bruised elbow. “Happy?” You questioned tauntingly and your smirk grew as you saw the man seething. Despite his intimidating height, you couldn’t help but think he looked like a cartoon character with the way you were sure steam would be bursting out of his ears at any second. When he made no further move to continue the fight, you swiftly turned around and walked out of the room, smiling when you heard him yell in frustration and throw something to the floor. The knife, you presumed.

You didn’t bother visiting the doctor to help you treat your wounds as you wrapped a strap of clothing around it and called it a day. Any respect you had for him instantly flew down the drain when you caught him drinking the rubbing alcohol meant for treating wounds and acting immaturely all the time. You walked in the direction of the exit, making sure to not be spotted by any soldiers as you did. When you finally got there and pushed the door open, you let out a breath of relief. The moment you stepped out the door and into the clean air of the outdoors, you felt yourself relax a little more than before. You found it odd how you felt more relaxed outside of the safe haven the stadium provided but you couldn’t help yourself. In the outdoors, you felt free. You could think without hindrance and allow yourself to feel an emotion that wasn't complete and utter despair.

The ground crunched below your feet as you walked across the gravel towards the green grass fields. You had no objective or destination in mind for today, you just wanted to escape the oppressive hands of your 'superiors.'

Walking on light feet, still making sure to keep your head focused on the area around you in case a monster appeared, you found yourself standing in front of a building. There was nothing special about this building. Half of it wasn't even attached as it lay broken in shambles around the structure. The ladder leading to the roof was rusted and had some of the metal bars sticking out awkwardly. The building in total was relatively normal and in good shape compared to those around it.

The only special thing about this building was the memories that it spurred within your head.

You climbed up the ladder, tears blocking your vision as they collected on your waterline despite your deepest efforts. You lost everyone. You lost Hyun-su; the boy you called home; the boy you called your soulmate; the boy you loved more than anyone or anything else. You lost Ji-su, the girl you decided you could call your best friend after spending so much time with her on the first floor of Green Home for those days at the beginning of this mess. You even lost Su-yeong, the little girl you’d grown so protective over… gone without a second thought. You never truly had Eun-yu so it wouldn’t hurt as much whether or not she had died. The only person you truly felt you had left was Yeong-su. You hated yourself for doing this to him but only having him wasn’t enough to stay anymore.

You felt like you were drowning. You were unable to handle the constant feeling of your emotions overpowering you. You’d heard so many times that it got easier as time went on but you never thought you would be able to overcome this. Although it might have been fitting to end your life by drowning, you just wanted a quick and painless death.

Falling solved that for you.

When you finally climbed the ladder to the roof of the building, you couldn’t help the sobs that wracked your body. You hopped up onto the edge of the building and looked up. The sky seemed to perfectly oppose how you were feeling. Soft, puffy white clouds were fluttering through the atmosphere and forming different shapes you could just barely make out. The tears slipped down the side of your face as you tried to gain some sort of peace before you followed through with your decision.

The wind was a gentle, cool breeze across your damp cheeks as you stood and glanced across the beautiful terrain below you. The grass had just barely begun to grow out of its perfect and well-maintained state, but it was still a wonderful sight to see. There were flower gardens surrounding the tall building, some crushed brutally by the falling of the walls but most were left perfectly untouched and thriving in the new world. The sight made your body calm down, the tears cascading waterfalls of sorrow down your cheeks slowly coming to a stop. You’ve heard of the acceptance of death people have when they know they’re about to die. You’d never thought you would have to face that kind of acceptance, never really thought the way you’d die would be because the world had been cruel and gave you too much pain for you to handle. You never thought that yet there you were.

There you were, standing on the edge of the tallest building you could find, one foot raised and hovering over the edge and you giving one last smile to the world before having your other foot join it.

The wind screamed in your ears and you swear you could hear voices within it. Voices calling your name. Voices that sounded too similar to one you’d lost. You let your eyes fall shut as memories flashed through your mind. Memories of reading to Su-yeong and Yeong-su; memories of playing the guitar and singing with Ji-su, laughter interrupting each word because you couldn’t take yourselves seriously; memories of Hyun-su.

Memories of shaking his hand when you first met him after he moved in across the hall from you in Green Home.

Memories of him coming to you crying for the first time and confessing how he couldn’t stand being alive anymore.

Memories of losing yourself in his eyes when he smiled at you.

Memories of his touch against your cheeks when he leaned in to leave a kiss against your forehead.

Memories of him.

A single tear drop fell from your eye and you smiled at the thought of meeting him again, whether that be in your next life or the one that comes after death. There was no doubt in your mind that he was gone, and that thought alone was more than half of your reasons for wanting to end it all.

Just as you were sure you were about to hit the bottom, a strong yet lean arm wrapped around your body and gently set you down on the ground before retreating just as quickly as it had appeared. You shot your eyes open only to be left with the blue sky above you and the intense wind that breezed over your body as whatever it was that saved you disappeared. For a few moments, you couldn’t breathe. You couldn’t move, couldn’t blink, couldn’t think, couldn’t do anything except stare in perplexment at the sky. As you sat up, you still couldn’t think straight and allowed your body to work on autopilot as it walked you home.

It took a full week until you were finally able to come to terms with the fact that either you had imagined the whole thing or something - someone - had saved you.

A month after your first attempt, you tried again. You couldn’t handle the stares of disdain and hatred towards you after you had defended Eun-yu as others criticized her about her apparent murder of Chief Ji’s husband. Yet, just like the last time, you were saved miraculously last minute by that same strange force.

You tried a dozen more times, all ending with the same result. It was so frustrating and you could barely handle the pain knowing you couldn’t even control your death, let alone your life.

The tears streamed down your face violently as you knelt and smacked your fists angrily against the wet, coarse dirt of where you were, once again, gently placed down after another failed attempt to end your life. The shredded noose hung limp around your neck and you ripped it off aggressively. You let out an agonizing scream from the deepest part of your lungs and it ended with more sobs as you let yourself fall onto your side with your knees pulled into your chest. Your loud sobs slowly quieted down but the tears never stopped falling. You stood up from the wet ground, your hair and clothes both stained by the mud below. Water rained down from the heavens, soaking your shirt and making it cling to your chest. Your tears blurred with the raindrops that splashed against you and slowly made their way down your face, disappearing down your neck and into the collar of your shirt.

“Why are you doing this?” You yelled into the open air, receiving no answer. “Why? Why do you keep doing this? Why won’t you just let me die?” You choked on a sob at that last question and yet you still received no answer. Defeated, you decided to retreat back to the stadium and get cleaned up. When you returned, Jin-ok was the first to notice the bruising around your neck and your tired, puffy eyes. When she asked, you played dumb but you could tell she saw right through you. Luckily, she left it alone.

You ended up curled up in your hammock for hours as you sobbed your heart out.

Although the stadium might have been a better place to follow through with your plan, you refused to put your few remaining friends - if you could even really call them that - through that. Put them through the pain of seeing your dead body and knowing they might have been able to stop it. Even though you would be dead by then, you wouldn’t be able to live with yourself. The only way you would allow yourself to follow through was outside of the stadium.

But a certain someone, or something, wouldn’t allow that to happen.

That was the last time you tried to end your life.

You’d had many dangerous encounters since then but every time they would be cleared out by your guardian angel before you could even really call them a threat. It got to the point where you felt more safe outside the stadium compared to within its concrete walls.

Sighing, you averted your eyes from the building and walked around it, focusing instead on the plants that were just starting to bloom in the early spring. The breeze was a welcome chill that rose goosebumps along your arms. As you continued to walk, your mind blank and your feet destinationless as you wandered, you came across a large pool of water.

And a girl.

She was young, and couldn’t have been more than 5 years old. It was such a shock to see her there, especially all by herself, that you didn’t realize she was sinking until it was almost too late. Without a second of hesitation, you jumped right into the lake and swam as fast as you could towards her. Grabbing a hold of her hand, you pulled her along as you swam back up to the surface. You dragged her towards the edge of the earth where the stable ground met the water and laid her down. Lowering your head to her mouth, you tried to listen to her breathing but instead, you got a headbutt to the ear. She shot up and started coughing up water. You ignored how your ear stung at that moment and instead rubbed along her back while she breathed heavily.

“Are you okay?” You asked her and she suddenly snapped her head towards you, like she didn’t recognize your presence until you spoke.

Slowly, she nodded. “Yes,” she hesitated before quietly asking, “Did you save me?”

You smiled at her shy mannerisms as she played with the hem of her wet and dirtied dress. “Yeah, I did.”

She looked up at you, almost surprised with your confession, and gave you a shy smile back. “Thank you,” she whispered before averting her eyes again.

You couldn’t stop the smile growing even brighter on your face at her adorableness. You looked around, seeing nobody else in sight. Your eyebrows furrowed as you began to worry about who she was and why nobody was taking care of her. “Are you alo-”

Just as you started to speak, a wet and slimy tentacle-like appendage wrapped itself around your torso and yanked you back into the lake. You thrashed around but couldn’t unravel yourself from the monster’s grip. You saw your knife float away and sink further down the dark abyss that was the bottom of the lake. With it, the last of your newfound hope to live followed. Just as you lost the last of the reserved air in your lungs, a sudden figure dove into the water and wrapped its arm around you. Just before your eyes fluttered shut, you swore you saw the blurry face of the same boy who haunted your dreams. The boy who haunted your nightmares.

The same boy who haunted your mind as you stuttered between the line separating life and death after surrendering to the lack of oxygen.

“Hyun-su!”

You screamed as you saw the military take him away. You lay helplessly against the side of the crumbling Green Home building as the pain of moving around too much from your wounds caused you to be dead-weight in your spot.

He let out a scream of agony that ended with your name and you felt your heart shatter. He was surrounded by multiple people; doctors, scientists, and soldiers alike. Each person’s face was surrounded by a strange darkness. The only thing you could make out of their faces were their evil, wide smiles, and their eyes tainted a demonic red. The sight made you feel even more helpless and despair-ridden than before.

You could do nothing but watch as the love of your life was taken from you without a second thought.

Hyun-su gathered you in his human-form arm while the other, extended in his monstrous form, swung back and forth through the water to slice at the monstrous being that dared to harm you. He didn’t waste much more time under the water to fight the beast as he noticed your eyes had slipped shut and you weren’t releasing any more air bubbles. He surged upwards, his wing doing most of the work as he darted through the surface of the water and onto the solid ground near the same little girl you had saved before.

Lying you down on the ground gently, he lowered his head to your mouth to hear if you were breathing, cursing quietly when he realized you weren’t. It was at times like these that he thanked whatever deity existed that he allowed himself to be persuaded by his parents to be a lifeguard for a summer. That way, he learned and was certified in CPR.

Plugging your nose, he administered two breaths into your mouth before pressing his - now both fully human - hands to your chest. Just as he prepared for the first chest compression, you suddenly started coughing and turned onto your side as you continued to cough up the water from your lungs. He was so thankful there wasn’t enough water in your lungs that he would’ve had to break your ribs giving you CPR.

But he would choose broken ribs over a body that wasn’t breathing any day.

After coughing your lungs dry, you fell onto your back with your eyes closed as you took many deep breaths. Suddenly, you remembered the face you clearly remember saving you and shot up into a sitting position, your eyes wide and surprised. Your gaze immediately fell upon him.

Hyun-su.

You held your breath as your eyes met and you stared at each other for a few moments. Your hand hesitantly raised to reach out for him. His gaze didn’t stray from your own as you brought your hand to his face, a mix between a sigh and a sob leaving your throat as you felt the soft skin of his cheek touch your fingertips. He was wet and cold, but he was alive. A smile grew onto your face but it dropped just as Hyun-su’s began to form. You yanked your hand away as if his skin suddenly burned you, and it might as well have. You could see the hurt expression taking over his face but the feeling of the anger, betrayal, and grief flooding through your veins overpowered any feelings of remorse you might have felt. Taking a quick moment to look around for the child you saved, you let out a small sigh of relief when you saw her innocently watching the interaction between you and Hyun-su, breathing normally and sitting safe and sound on the grass.

“Take care of her for me, will you?” You asked him coldly, not waiting for an answer as you stood up and started speed walking in the opposite direction.

“No, wa- wait!” He scrambled to stand up, calling after you as you ignored his advances. “Stop!” He finally caught up to you and wrapped his hand around your bicep gently, turning you around to face him.

“What? What the fuck is so important that you finally feel the need to talk to me?” You let out a sob of a laugh as you ripped your arm away from him. You could slowly see the realization of why you were acting so angry and upset dawn on his face as guilt settled into his eyes. “You’ve gone this entire time being just fine as you save my life just to leave me there, alone, time and time again. So please - please - explain to me what is now so important you feel the need to reveal yourself to me.”

You looked at him expectantly as his mouth opened and closed, looking for an answer. He seemed to find it as he finally said, “I just… I really thought you died this time. I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

You looked at him, frustrated, for a moment before harshly scrubbing your palms over your eyes which were tearing up against your will. “So… what, after all the times you saved me, now you want to check on my safety?” Taking a deep breath, you forced your face to look calm, masking your anger for his sake so you could get out of this situation with as little hindrance as possible. You dropped your hands to your sides, your tears smeared across your face leaving it in a shiny glow. “Well thank you, Hyun-su, for your consideration,” you spoke the last word with bitterness lacing your tone that you could tell he caught as he winced softly. “But I am fine.”

You turned around, fully intent on heading back to the stadium when his hand wrapped around your bicep again. “What?” You asked angrily and turned around only to be pulled into a tight hug. You didn’t waste time in fighting his grip but he was relentless. “Let me go!” You screamed at him, although it was muffled by his shirt. “You’re such an asshole! I fucking mourned for you! I built a fucking memorial and brought a flower every single week without fail and yet you were never fucking dead! Why did you keep letting me think you were dead?” You were now pounding your fists into his chest, no longer resisting his embrace but expressing the built-up anger, sadness, grief, and self-loathing you felt every single day. It all stemmed solely from the way you hated yourself for not trying harder to save him. Not trying harder to resist Eun-hyuk when he told you and Eun-yu he would bring him back. “Was it you? Was it you every time I was stopped? Every time I was in danger, it was you who saved me, wasn’t it? What gave you the fucking right?” The crying started again. In turn, your hits became less and less powerful with each strike along with your screams gradually quieting. “Why did you have to leave me?” You sobbed out and let your head fall onto his chest as he buried his face in your hair. Your hands clutched onto his t-shirt as if trying to anchor him to you, scared that if you let him go, he would disappear again. Your knees gave out, exhausted by the emotional turmoil washing over you from the last five minutes. And so soon after death caressed you on the cheek too. Hyun-su caught you and slowly lowered the two of you to the ground, never once breaking the embrace.

You sat in silence, only broken by the sound of your sobs as they slowly subsided. When you settled down, you spoke once more.

“Did you know I was in love with you?” You didn’t feel any physical reaction from him that would express what he was feeling in that moment so you continued. “I never stopped. Loving you, I mean. I don’t think I ever will, but god, I hate you so much right now.”

There were a few silent beats where the only sound you could hear was the sound of his heartbeat against your ear until he spoke.

“I didn’t think I would be able to handle seeing you again and find you with this exact reaction. By the time I left the military’s grasp, I tried to find you but then I saw you on that ledge.”

It surprised you and calmed your nerves all the same.

“I knew I was just being a coward but I thought too much time had passed for me to just show up. Today was just a bit different.” He leaned back a bit to look at you and you did the same. He gave a small smile when he saw you again, with your wet eyes and glistening cheeks you looked wonderful. Even after sobbing your heart out, you were still the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen. “My love, I’ve loved you since the first moment I saw you, and I never stopped either,” he leaned in slowly so your foreheads rested against each other and your noses brushed. “And if you need time to stop hating me, I’ll wait as long as it takes.”

You looked into his radiating brown eyes as the last tear slipped from your own before bringing a hand up to cup his cheek once again. You let out a small laugh which he returned with an adoring smile. Leaning in, you pressed your lips against his in a soft, unhurried kiss. He slid a hand up from where it was pulling you into his embrace to rest against the back of your neck as he held you against him. When the both of you were smiling too much to continue the kiss, you leaned back just enough to stare into each other’s eyes. The adoration and love you had for each other would be clear for anyone to see from the way you gazed at each other.

You suddenly pushed forward and wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him close and hugging him once more. He sat still for a moment as he processed what you did only to wrap his arms around your waist. He hugged you just as tight and with just as much desperation as you did.

“God, I missed you so much,” you whispered into his ear and he sighed shakily into the spot where his face was buried in your neck.

“I missed you too, so much. I’m so sorry for not coming back sooner.”

“Well, you’re here now, and that’s all that matters to me,” you reassured him and he physically relaxed, his shoulders untensing and him falling further into your embrace.

The sound of the soft pattering of footsteps interrupted the moment you two were sharing. However, it was entirely welcome when you saw the little girl you had saved before standing beside you. You pulled away from Hyun-su, but not too far as he grabbed onto one of your hands. You smiled at him slightly, he was obviously just as starved of your touch as you were his.

“Hi there,” you told her gently when you turned back to her, not wanting to scare her in any way. “What’s your name?”

She looked down shyly, not answering until Hyun-su reached out to her with his hand. “It’s okay, she’s a good one,” he reassured her as he brushed some stray wet strands of her pin-straight black hair out of her face when her small hands were unable to. He took her hand and gently pulled her closer to the two of you. It made you smile as you saw them interact. The caring and soft way Hyun-su acted with her reminded you so much of a father interacting with his daughter.

It just made you love him even more.

He gave her one more nod of reassurance before she timidly introduced herself.

“M-my name is Ah-yi,” she stuttered out and you silently cooed at her adorable little shy smile. “Thank you for saving me, Miss.”

“Of course, Ah-yi, you are very welcome,” you gave her your own smile and some of her shyness seemed to fade away. You then gave her your name and she visibly brightened up.

“You’re the princess!” You gave her a confused smile with a small laugh as she then began to explain. “Oppa’s told me stories about you! How you’re the princess of the big green castle and how he was a knight in shining armor who was saved by you, the warrior princess!” She talked animatedly with her hands swinging around wildly and her chest puffing out at the end to make her seem stronger. Your lips formed a big smile as you looked over at Hyun-su to see him lightly glaring at Ah-yi with a big blush coating his cheeks.

“Ah, so you’ve told stories about me, have you?” You teased him and he looked at you before rolling his eyes.

“Shut up,” he mumbled and you yelped as he yanked on your hand, sending you falling onto his chest with a loud laugh.

You talked a bit more with Ah-yi, somehow ending with her laying her head in your lap as you leaned against Hyun-su with your back to his chest. The three of you watched the clouds, pointing out any shapes you could find and making up stories that Ah-yi seemed to love. Every time you looked over at Hyun-su, you could see all of his attention focused on you and how you interacted with the small child.

Time seemed to fly as eventually, the sun started to fade into the distance, only leaving splotches of light shining through the leaves of the tall trees surrounding you. All three of you stood up and you glanced in the direction of the stadium with sad eyes. You couldn’t stand the thought of leaving Hyun-su yet. Even the thought of leaving the small girl you had grown strongly attached to in the past few hours broke your heart. Hyun-su seemed to sense your hesitation as he grabbed your hand.

You looked back at him and he looked at you so fondly you felt like your heart might burst. With his thumb gently caressing your knuckles, he looked you in the eyes and said, “Stay. Stay with me. With us. You don’t have to go yet.”

He seemed just as desperate to make up for lost time with you as you were with him. His eyes widened and that smile you loved so dearly formed on his face when you nodded with little thought put into the decision. Pulling you closer with his arm circling your shoulders and one of yours circling his waist while the other hand reached out for Ah-yi to grab. She practically leaped at the opportunity.

“You ready, princess?” Hyun-su asked you in a soft teasing voice and you looked up at him with the same passionate smile gracing your lips.

“Lead the way, my shining knight.”

~~~

Pt 2: Floating Above Those Dark Skies :)

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13uswntimagines · 5 months

Text

The Come Down (Alessia Russo X MMA fighter!R)

R is a very popular MMA fighter, and Alessia sees the parts of you that other people don't. Shes the one who gets to put you back together again after a tough fight.

Warnings: D/S undertones but no smut.

Author's note: This was super fun to write and i hope you enjoy it. Feel free to hit me up with ideas and comments and stuff.

You sighed, leaning your head against the stone walls of the Emirates tunnel, letting it soothe the twinges that always lingered after a long flight.

It was masochistic, but the ache that lingered the day after a war in the Octagon was always one of your favorite feelings, especially if you won. It helped you to compartmentalize the parts of yourself. It helped you separate the completely in-control fighter, the stone-cold monster that didn’t give a fuck about her opponents, and the human that lingered underneath.

It was hard to punch a man until he was unconscious if you thought about how human he was. If you pictured his family and his life as anything other than an opponent for you to run through. But you never wanted that part of yourself to exist anywhere other than in the cage.

The throb in your muscles and ache in your cuts helped you lock that part of yourself away. It helped you keep your grip on reality in all of the post-fight hormones until you could get to the grounding force that was your girlfriend.

The post-fight come-down was always difficult for you, especially after a 5 round back and forth battle like the one you had just fought.

You loved your job, you really did, but it was so easy to… lose yourself. To get lost in the anger of the UFC universe and the vitriol of your opponents. To get lost in the cycle of Training, listening to a man tell you he was going to destroy you at press conferences, cutting weight and beating the ever-living fuck out of someone while people cheered.

Just being in the same building as Alessia had set you at ease, and watching her score 2 against Chelsea was even better.

But the sound of the crowd had started to set you on edge. The way they erupted when your face, black eye, stitched gash on your cheek curving up to your forehead and all, appeared on the Jumbotron after your girlfriend’s PK had you clenching your teeth. It egged on the thoughts of murdering the keeper that had taken her out swirling in your brain, along with the desire to demolish the player who had so callously stepped on her teammate after a play.

It was why you escaped to the tunnel, to gain some form of control over your thoughts.

Maybe flying out as soon as you had been cleared by the medics wasn’t such a good idea, but you couldn’t stand being away from Alessia any longer than you had to be. You couldn’t stand being away from the comfort, love, and… safety she offered you.

God, you sounded like a psycho.

Or a submissive nearing the end of her rope.

6 weeks apart from your girlfriend was really doing a number on you.

“Ay bruiser, fancy meeting you here,” Katie said, appearing in front of you with a wide smile.

You flashed a toothy grin at the Irishwoman, ignoring the way it pulled at the stitches holding your cheek together. “Maccabe, always a pleasure,”

She caught your arm. “That was one hell of a fight. Thought Less was gonna break my hand during the third round,”

You grimaced.

The third round was the only one your opponent won. He had caught you with a big overhand right, opening the gash on your cheek and knocking you on your ass in the last 15 seconds of the round. The knees he had followed it up with to your side hadn’t been fun either. He had almost finished you, and you knew it had to be hard for the team and your girlfriend to watch.

“My hand dipped when I tried to close the distance,”

It really was a game of inches, and he had certainly taken advantage of your small mistake. It was ok, you had gotten him in the end anyway.

Katie made a sound of agreement, glancing at the tunnel behind you. “Certainly made us all nervous, but I’m happy you took his head off, even if it took you until the last 30 seconds of the fight,”

She made a little kicking movement with her leg like a semi-recreation of the head kick you had used to end the fight.

“Didn’t want to rush it,” You shrugged, nodding to the Arsenal girls as they passed you, unable to help the way you automatically searched each face for your girlfriend.

“Ya missus is still signing for a couple of kids,” She gestured over her shoulder, a knowing smile still playing at her lips. “I can take you to her if you want?”

You shook your head. “I’ll wait here. I’m in no hurry,”

You also didn’t think you could deal with the sounds of the crowd when your head was still pounding, a consequence of taking a flight with a concussion against doctor's orders you supposed, and you ached every time you took a step, every time you inhaled too deeply really.

Katie’s eyes softened when she saw the emotions flit across your features. “Come on, let's go to the locker room instead. It’s away from prying eyes,”

She tugged your hand. You let her lead you deeper into the tunnel and into a room filled with wooden cubbies.

It was nice to let your brain turn off, to just… follow along and allow someone else to lead you.

“Hey champ,” Leah smiled at you as Katie deposited you in what you assumed was Alessia’s locker. “That was one hell of a fight last night,”

“Thanks,” You winked at the defender. “You guys had a fantastic game too,”

“I’m not sure a football match compares to a man trying to punch you in the face,” Steph said, glancing at you from her spot near Lottie.

You made a low sound in the back of your throat, feeling the tightness return to your chest. “But I don’t have people stepping on me after the bell,”

“But you do end up covered in blood,” Kyra chirped. “We don’t have to worry about that usually,”

“Most of the time it’s not mine,” You muttered, leaning further into your girlfriend's locker. Her perfume lingered in the cubby, and you let it soothe the frayed edges of your nerves.

You didn’t want to think about fighting. About the person. The savage. you were in the octagon. You toyed with the hem of your sweatshirt sleeve. It was slightly too long because it really belonged to Alessia. She had given it to you before fight week.

It helped, but it wasn’t her.

It hadn’t been enough after the fight, and it wasn’t enough now.

You didn’t think you could wait much longer, but you didn’t have to.

“The stadium is buzzin,” Alessia said slightly breathlessly, stepping through the locker room door.

You were immediately on your feet, taking in her flushed cheeks and bright eyes. “Less,”

A grin instantly broke across her face, and she crossed the room in 3 long strides. Her arms wrapped around you, and without thinking you buried your face in her chest.

It made the gash on your cheek sting and the tender skin of your jaw ache, but you didn’t care, pressing yourself as tightly to her as you could. She shifted, her nails running over your back with one hand as the other cupped the back of your neck.

It was gentle, and grounding, and everything that you craved.

“Hey baby girl,” She breathed into your hair, her voice dipping just a little and sending a shudder down your spine.

She was like a ray of sunshine, always warm and sweet. It was why none of the fans would ever speculate about the positions that the two of you held in your relationship. They joked that she was too soft to be a dominant, but the people who understood how your relationship worked could see that her mix of firmness and warmth was exactly what you needed.

She waited for you to pull away first, just enough to meet her eyes. “Hey,”

She leaned in and placed a careful kiss on your lips. “I’ll shower and then we can go, yeah?”

You deflated, your fingers tangling more tightly in her jersey. You didn’t want to let her go, even if it was just for a second.

“You can come with me,” She said, a knowing look in her eyes. “And tell me all about fight week,”

“Ok,” You agreed, only loosening your grip long enough for her to grab her shower bag and change of clothes, before you latched back on, holding the hem of her jersey tightly as she led you towards the showers.

You felt a bit like a child, clinging to her, but she was like a buoy keeping you from drowning in the sea of your rocky emotions, and now that she was close to you, you couldn’t let her go. You were afraid that if you did, you would lose your grip on reality.

The warm, wet air of the shower helped too.

It reminded you of your post-fight routine.

Win or lose you would stand under the hot steam of the stadium, washing off the blood and sweat from the octagon until your coaches pulled you out. It was part of the routine that you had skipped since the docs wanted to stitch your cheek as soon as you were out of eyeshot of the fans.

Then you had felt so… off balance that you raced through a cold shower and hopped on a plane to get to your girlfriend as quickly as possible. You didn’t even stay for the post-fight press conference.

“Come on love,” She said, pulling you into one of the stalls, sliding the first curtain shut behind the two of you, and bringing her face inches from yours.

Her hand very gently cupped your cheek, mindful of the dark bruises that littered the skin, tilting your chin up. Her eyes searched you for a long moment like she was reading your mind. Like she was deciding what you needed from her.

Her pointer finger very gently followed the long cut that ran under your left cheek, up to your temple, and just above your eyebrow. “I thought they usually put a bandage over stitches,”

Your eyes darted away from her. “I didn’t like the way it pulled at my skin,”

“I think you’d like it less if you got an infection,” She deadpanned, using her thumb to tilt your chin up further as she stepped into your space. “You wouldn’t be able to fight,”

“But the scar would be worth it,” You shrugged, using all of your strength to muster up fake nonchalance.

Her lip quirked upward. “Would it?”

You let your own smile morph into a playful smirk, despite the tremendous effort it took. “Chicks dig girls with scars,”

“I think you’ve got enough of those, cheeky,” She hummed, leaning in and brushing the thick line that lived on the underside of your jaw with her nose. “I like it more when you come out without a scratch on you or a hair out of place,”

You hummed, leaning back on the stall wall as her lips replaced her nose on your jaw, her teeth grazing the delicate skin as she made her way down the column of your throat and back up.

Her hips pressed into yours, keeping you pinned to the wall, her thumbs insistent under your chin, keeping your head tilted up as her tongue slid pleasantly against your own.

You sighed into the kiss, your fingers twisting into the material of her jersey, trying to pull her closer.

Her thigh flexed between your legs, pressing into you, and you couldn’t help the way your hips rolled down to meet her.

Or the wince that broke the kiss when the

movement pulled uncomfortably at your ribs.

“Babe?”

You whined as she pulled away, blinking open to meet her burning blue eyes.

“I’m ok,” You said breathlessly, trying to lean back up to kiss her.

Her hand on your chest stopped you, as did the perfect arch of her eyebrow that screamed yeah right.

Her fingers traced down your chest to the hem of your shirt. They crept under your top, meeting the tape wrapped heavily across your abdomen instead of smooth skin.

Her eyes widened when she pulled up your sweatshirt, revealing the thick white bandages wrapped tightly across your stomach.

“Want to try again love?” She asked, finally looking up at you with an expression that had a shiver tingling down your spine.

“Just two cracked ribs and some nasty bruises,” You huffed, shifting uncomfortably when her fingers grazed the material.

“Just,” She snorted, shaking her head, dropping your shirt, and standing up to her full height. “Why didn’t you tell me last night?”

You shrugged. “I didn’t want you to worry. The stitches were already enough,”

“I’d rather know and worry than accidentally hurt you,” Alessia said seriously.

You looked away from her, swallowing hard. “And I knew you wouldn’t touch me at all if I told you,”

“Baby girl,” She murmured, her voice going very soft, her thumb very gently ghosting over your uninjured cheek.

She knew that the come down from fights was always particularly difficult for you. That the power that you held in the octagon always made you crave submission. You craved to not have to think, to just exist, and then to let your being relax in the aftercare that followed.

This time the desire was amplified by the brutality of the fight.

She could see you teetering on the edge, fighting the fog that always filled your brain, and while she wanted to scold you for withholding information, she knew that that wasn’t what you needed from her.

Not when you were already dropping so hard.

“Ok,” She said, keeping her voice soft as you leaned further into her touch. “I’m going to shower, and you’re going to be a good girl and stay right here for me, alright?”

You made a low noise in the back of your throat, and your eyes slid closed as you nodded very slowly.

“Good girl,” She hummed, placing a very gentle kiss on your lips, and pulling away. “I’ll be two minutes love,”

You sagged against the shower stall wall.

You could do that. You could wait 120 seconds for your girlfriend.

You could and would do whatever she asked you to do because you knew it would help. You knew she would fit all of your loose pieces back together again and make it ok.

You just had to exist.

#woso x reader #woso imagines #alessia russo x reader #alessia russo imagine #the come down universe

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pia-nor481 · 5 months

Text

Champion of the world

Max Verstappen x reader smut

3.1k words

Max had preformed so well this year. He won races and was on the podium often and yet he couldn't help but feel anxious. Max was one of those people who often bottled their feeling and thoughts up, thinking it was the best idea, when in fact, it was not. They were sat in his red bull drivers room before the start of the race. "Max it will be okay, you'll do amazing like always. You've spent so much of your life racing and preparing for racing, it's your time." Her words didn't soothe him all that much, no matter how right she was, nothing would get through to him. "That doesn't mean I'll win, anything could happen on the track, no matter how good of a driver I am. There could be a safety car, someone could crash into me, the engine could fail or a really slow pitstop." He always made it worse for him self, yes all those things were possible, but it didn't mean it was all going to happen and ruin the race. He still had a chance of winning the championship. She looked up at him, trying to hide her disappointment in his statement, he was sat above her on top of what was the most uncomfortable 'bed', while she sat with her legs crossed on the floor, she enjoyed max looking down at her, regardless of the context.

They where in this position often, every race she turned up to, Max was on the top step of the podium, he knew it was superstitious, but he felt as though she was a good luck charm. Monaco was the first race she attended, rushing down from their flat towards the paddock after spending a little too much time in bed with Max. They'd ended up in his drivers room once again, her pulling the zip of his race suit up, not without him running his hands over her body. They quickly made a rule, if she was dressing him, he could undress her. It often lead to her freezing adorning just underwear. It made max relax, and she'd do anything to ensure that. But it max didn't win, even if he left covered in champagne and walking away with a trophy, it didn't seem to be enough.

So Max would lock him self in his so called 'office' of their shared flat and worsen his eyesight by staring at a screen. He would spend said time analysing data and strategies, or watching previous races trying to see where he would lose time, and then use the sim for hours on end. Max would barely leave the room, Jimmy and Sassy would often scratch at the door wanting their owner's attention, but would hardly get it. She would be left to look after his cats, and try to look after him. She would try everything possible to make Max leave those four walls, mainly make him some sort of meal, depending on the hour. First she'd call out to him, and get no response, then she'd text, again no response. Finally she walk straight into the room and just place the plate on his desk, hoping he might actually acknowledge her. But he never really did. Of course Max appreciated everything she did, he just wasn't overly connected. Most nights she'd go to bed with out him, and be woken up at an ungodly hour upon feeling the bed dip slightly, but when she would reach out in the morning, his side of the bed would be cold. Although the dishes she left in the sink last night were washed, there was no trace of her boyfriend anywhere. Not even in the sim room.

Around three hours later, Max would come back drained, clearly coming back from what was a particularly difficult training session. His kissed her on the lips before promptly walking toward the bathroom. She knew that he wouldn't be seen again for a while. This became a cycle for the couple. Until it was Saturday, post qualifying was always a fun time. Max usually felt better about racing when he was starting on the front row. This usually fixed the slight drift in their relationship; Max became a lot more aware for what he was doing, the proper term would be neglecting, but it would take him a while to come out of this hyper focus and begin to look after himself, and his girlfriend of course. He wouldn't leave her side, man felt so debilitated because of his actions, then he often would feel his heart thumping loud in his ears. His cortisol levels would have been sky high, a long with his disappointment in himself. He couldn't believe that she would still be loving and caring towards him, after all he had been putting her through this year. She must have felt so lonely, so unloved, and yet she would still kiss him like there was no tomorrow. She never turned him down because she loved him dearly.

"I love you, thank you so much for everything, you honestly don't know how much I appreciate it, appreciate you." It seemed like a simple sentence that would be written in cursive inside of a birthday card, yet Max meant every word. It would clear the stress of points was getting to him. He was so irritable and angry, he couldn't sleep and constantly had headaches even paracetamol could cure. It was daunting to see her boyfriend in such a way. "Max, just come to bed, please, I'm struggling to sleep without you here." She already had to settle with out cuddles, max felt as though he got too warm in bed, but now having to sleep without him. It was becoming too much. "I need to win the next few races, I don't want to get far behind in the points." Receiving 12.5 points in Belgium wasn't particularly helpful in this situation.

"Give me a kiss before you go." She almost begged as Max stood up, the national anthem was going to start soon and so he needed to be out in the pad ok by now. So he pulled her closer by the waist and connected their lips. She gripped his upper arm in the process, just wanting to feel him once again. They stayed like this for a few minutes, not wanting to let go, she may have not realised it, but Max felt most relaxed in her presence, feeling her helped the most though. "I love you"

The race was horrifying. Abu dabi was already a tricky race, that coupled with a safety car was not great for Max. He was however, capable of over taking Lewis Hamilton, and thereby won the race. Elated was all Max could feel, finally he was able to take a full breath and smile, he finally felt relaxed in away; stress free. He was practically screaming down the radio. Max was the world champion and he was ecstatic. After coming down from the high of a win, max decided he wanted another. You wouldn't think Max verstappen would be overly fond of a quicky, due to his nature of trying hard and making things perfect, that should take time, but it was something he enjoyed, the thought of getting caught was such a turn on for him. "Come here." He stated, grabbing her, not overly rough, that however was not his thing. Covered in champagne, Max pulled her back towards his drivers room, and as soon as the door was shut he pulled her close. His mouth immediately attacked her neck and she moaned out, running her hands up his body and into his hair, tugging on it slightly. "Don't start, baby."

Max was angry, the fact he had to ask on multiple occasions if they were sure he won was most likely the cause. He liked to be dominant, he always was, in every aspect of his life. He slid his hands over her back and under her ass, pulling her up so she could wrap her legs around his hips, he gently, as possible, placed her on the bed of the room. Max didn't let go, he was being possessive. His hand constantly made contact with her skin. Just as he slid his hand between her thighs she moaned out, "Please Max." Everything he did always felt good, she felt it through out her whole body. She pulled the zip of his race suit down and began palming his cock, he groaned at the feeling, becoming a little more loud than usual. "Please Max, just fuck me already." She knew they were running out of time, he had places to be.

As Max slid in he felt as though he was losing all control of himself. With every thrust of his hips he got closer to ecstatic, he reached down again, putting pressure on her clit, making sure she was getting as close as he was. Her moans echoed through out the room as Max sped up, rubbing faster circles on her skin. "Feels so good." She was losing the ability to form coherent sentences, thoughts too, Max knew she was close and wouldn't leave the room until she was satisfied. "Cum with me, love" He practically moaned out, leaning closer to her body. With her eyes still rolled to the back of her head, Max pulled out slowly, almost rushing to pull his clothes back on properly. She sat there for a while, watching Max, she was so happy to just be around him, that much was clear with the smile on her face, she was so blissed out, not that Max was surprised. They'd not had sex for a few weeks, so she'd not cum in a while. Once he didn't look disheveled, he began to kiss her lightly, wanting to provide some form of comfort before he had to disappear for interviews and debriefing. "I've got to go, love" he spoke softly as he shifted closer to the edge of the bed, and so, he kissed her and help do the buttons of her top up. "I know, I'll go back to the hotel and get ready, it seems like we have a lot of celebrating to do." With one final kiss to the forehead before walking towards the door. She knew that going to a club tonight wasn't nonnegotiable, they would all be getting immensely drunk.

Once they got off of Max's private jet, they practically rushed towards their flat. Max hooked his arm around her neck as they approached the front door, he was yawning the whole ride over, Max was exhausted, not physically but mentally; the stress of the season was really affecting him. "Talk to me, please, love." She looked over to him as the words left her mouth, she placed her phone and keys on the table and looked at him again. "About what?" Max looked a little on the pale side compared to normal, yet he still tried to give her everything he had. "How you are actually feeling, I hate to say it, but I'm going to because I love you so much, you seem to be so worn out, you need real rest, and yet I know you will be in that sim room, trying to improve your already amazing performance." A small trace of defeat laced her words, Max did become a tad bit displeased with the statement, but he didn't have the strength to be more than so. "Everyone thinks I cheated, as if there's a point of racing. There's no point in winning if I didn't try for it; and I know I've put in so much effort. I spent the better half of the year on the sim, I've had to get new glasses I've been staring at that screen for so long. But that's not even the worst part... I've driven you away in the process. I've been an awful boyfriend and no doubt made your life so much harder. I'm so sorry,love."

He felt so relieved having got that off of his chest, with rather loud sigh and a fall of his chest, Max walked towards her again, He rested his head on top her. "Oh Max, I love you, I'm not going to leave just because you were busy. You wanted to win and you definitely deserve it. You're right in the sense that locking yourself away for so long wasn't fair on me, but I knew how much you wanted this. And if it was going to make you happy, then it would make me happy." He was almost in tears. There wasn't anything they wouldn't do for each other. "You need to relax." She said, feeling his finger tug on her top slightly, before his hand slipped all the way up her chest. " I think I know how to relax." He smirked, grabbing her wrist and lightly pulling her towards their bedroom.

She pushed his chest lightly, forcing him to lay down on the bed, she enjoyed the feeling of warmth against her finger tips, Max's touch was divine. He began to sit up, reach out for her body. Her hands made contact again, while she spoke, "I don't think so." Her tone was teasing, she wanted him to feel good, he wanted to feel good, but she would control the when. "Oh, please, love. Don't tease me." Her hands slid over his torso, feeling every divot and muscle, the sensation was intense; max let out an exasperated sigh. As she climbed into his lap, she could feel his hard cock, it was almost painful. She palmed him once again, changing pressure to ensure he would be on the edge. He was practically moaning, the loudest she had ever heard him. "Be good." She whispered out, as his cock jumped. They had never discussed the possibility of Max having a praise kink, although he definitely deserved all the praise in the world after this season. "Did you like, hm? Do you like me calling you good? Or do you like when I tell you what to do?" Max's chest was rising and falling rapidly. "Answer me, Max." It didn't come across as aggressive, yet it was still demanding. He was shocked with himself, never did he think giving someone else completely control of his body would be so marvellous. She began to stroke his cock faster, slowing down every few moments to tease the tip, edging him further. "Yes, yes to all. Please, Love. Let me cum." He was virtually begging as she liked along the underside of his cock; the precum leaked heavily, and so she began sucking him dry. "Uh, yes." He could feel the sensation through out his entire body, and could hold back, her mouth quickly filled with his cum.

Max was panting as he sat up, making eye contact with her in the process. She leaned forward, kissing his neck, giving him as much attention as possible, he didn't cheat, never, not in any aspect of his life, he loved everything too much. He loved her. Her so called kisses left bright red marks all over his pale skin. "Sit back, baby." Max moved back towards the headboard, still blissed out and a little coherent; in the meantime, she slowly stripped of her clothes, giving him a little show while he caught his breath. Max's gaze shifted back towards her and he felt his cock harden again almost immediately, blood was rushing through his body rapidly. A lazy smirk dawned his face as she straddled him again, stoking him a bit before sitting down fully, taking him whole in her cunt. Her eyes rolled back temporarily at the feeling, it felt like he was in her stomach in this position; his hands rested firmly on her hip while she got used to the feel of the stretch. Max didn't have to say anything, she could tell by the look on his face, and the hunger in his eyes, that he felt euphoric, just being inside her.

"Fuck, Max, feels so good." He felt almost cocky at the statement, he didn't even have to do anything and she was already moaning. Max shifted slightly, bending his knees in an attempt to thrust his hips up, but her hands came down from his chest to stop his movements. "No, why won't you listen to me? I said you're not doing any of the work, and I mean it." As much as Max like control, he also liked to please. She began to lift her hips up and then down rather slowly, easing Max into it, without overstimulating him. She was already squeezing him tight, so it was hard for max to resist, he was desperate, desperate for her, desperate to cum. Her hands gripped the headboard for support, allowing her to fuck him faster, he moaned out as she leaned forward, almost coming off his cock completely. It all felt too good, they were both edging on ecstasy, so much so that Max's grip only tightened, leaving marks on her skin. Her hands came down from the bed and onto his chest as she began to ride him even faster, his eyes closed and mouth agape, he felt his legs start to shake slightly. "That's it, so good for me." She practically huffed out as his breath hitched. Max came hard, he could feel it through out his whole body; legs shakes, head thrashing with his eyes rolled to the back of his head, a choked out moan bounced off the walls in the process.

After riding out his high, her arms came down as she went to rest her head on his chest, silence filled the room for a moments as they both caught their breath. Her hands trailed over his body once again, this time, in a slightly less erotic way, a more comforting act. His hands slid up her back and into her hair, playing with it, this was an act they both enjoyed. "I love you." She knew that. “I’ll be better, I promise.” Light laughter filled his ears, “Max, I love you so much, don’t doubt that.” A smiled covered his face, he not only promised her, but himself; he felt terrible for what he did and so would never do it again. He could not treat her in such a way.

#f1 x reader #f1 x reader smut #f1 smut #33 max verstappen #max verstappen x reader smut #max verstappen x you #max verstappen smut #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen #MV:33

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gayerthanevertbh · 1 year

Text

my tears ricochet.

pairings: older!natasha romanoff x fem!reader

n.r masterlist | navigation | n.r one-shots masterlist

summary: after your divorce from natasha, life was never the same again. and when you and her revisit the past, it made you realize how much you were always in love with her.

warnings: unprotected sex, g!p natasha, dirty talking, pet names, sex on the couch, fingering, dry humping, angst, and fluff - 18+ MINORS DNI.

word count: 4.7k

author’s note: hopefully you’ll enjoy this one!

You were once married to an Avenger. You felt seen and loved by this Avenger at some point, and you never doubted their feelings for you. But as time goes on, you two grow apart and lose touch with one another's emotions. You've become the stereotypical housewife who cooks for their individual party, provides the best sex that they require so that they never have to seek it elsewhere, washes their clothes, and takes care of them as they should be taken care of. But as the routine continues, you find yourself wanting more. The problem is that you feel guilty. Why should you feel bad about wanting more? Why should you feel guilty when everything is perfect? That's where you feel completely alone and unnoticed by the woman you love.

It continued for a year or two after your daughter turned six. You remember vividly that night when you had dinner with your family, and Natasha came home that night on a very cold night – well, morning. She was devastated, her hair was all over the place. She looked unhygienic, and you didn’t want to admit that to yourself. When you saw her by the door, you were angry. You were demanding her time for your daughter, but she always gave the same excuse. I’m doing this for our family, Y/n. Can’t you see that? You do appreciate what she gives. In fact, you never complained in your life.

After that argument, you brought a file of divorce papers and gave it to her before she left for another mission the following month. She appeared distressed by your actions and begged you - repeatedly - to wait for her until the mission was completed. But you simply told the older woman, "I'm done with this cycle, Nat. I can't do it anymore." When she got tired of convincing you to stay, she just nodded and left.

She was gone for at least 3 months around that time.

And when she returned home from Budapest, she found an empty house. The couch she bought in the first month of marriage was still sitting against the wall, but the majority of the furniture had vanished. She dashed into the bedroom, where she found the bed clean and an old vintage lamp on the floor. That's when she broke down - that's when she realized she'd messed up her marriage and that she'll never get you back.

Five months later, you won custody of your daughter with Natasha. Although Natasha could still see her daughter, you had complete control over whether or not she could take her out of the state. But Natasha mostly just listened to you and respected your wishes. She would come to see you twice a month, mostly to look after Riley while you were at work. And when you returned home, Natasha would leave you food that she had ordered while you were away.

Everything you two had in the past had come to an end; you were now civil with her, which was a new routine - and you liked it at times, but you missed her. You must have missed her terribly. It's as if whenever she was away on a mission or simply unavailable, you would reflect on the times you spent with the woman. She was so caring, intelligent, and romantic that you wondered if you could ever be as romantic as her. She gave you everything you deserved in life. So most of the time, you felt guilty and unwanted.

You wanted your wife back, your wife that she used to be.

It was a Sunday afternoon, and you looked at the window noticing that the skies were gray once again. It had been raining in your state for quite some time, but you’re sure enough that there’ll be a storm around nighttime. You were making lunch while listening to quiet jazz music until Riley came to the room and asked: “Can I see Francis today, Mommy?”

You turned over your shoulder and jutted your lower lip out, knowing that it was too dangerous to go out and play.

“Honey I’m sorry, but I don’t think it’s possible today.”

She sighed, holding her teddy bear close to her chest.

“Francis wants to play with my dolls,” she said in a very tiny voice. “And there’s no school today, why can’t I play with her?”

“Because there’s a storm coming, sweetheart. We have to stay at home for now,” you walked towards your daughter and pecked her left cheek. She smiled at your gesture, it definitely warms your heart. “But guess what? Mama will be visiting later! She brought something for you.”

Her face brightens up, as her grin widens. “Really? Mama bought me another set of trains?”

“Well, she said it was a surprise,” you responded, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. “But don’t worry, I’m sure my little girl would love it.”

After you finished preparing lunch, Riley went back to her room, and you continued working in the kitchen. Suddenly, you heard a bell coming from the front door. Natasha came into the house after hearing your daughter squeal before you could turn around. She ran to her mother and immediately embraced her tightly around the neck.

“Oh, my baby,” Natasha sighed, kissing her forehead. “I’ve missed you so much!”

“I missed you too, Mama,” Riley whispered, giggling as Natasha pinched her soft cheeks. “Did you bring me a toy?”

“Hmm, if I could get a kiss first.”

After giving Natasha a second peck on the cheek, Riley jumped to the ground to retrieve a box from behind her. You looked back at your daughter, curious to see what she had received from Natasha this time.

“It’s a train! The one I wanted!”

“I’ll give you everything you want, my darling. Everything.”

You chuckled, your arms crossed tightly across your stomach. “You’re spoiling her too much, Nat. She’s gonna expect this from you whenever you come back home from work.”

The older woman smiled at you kindly, and replied: “It’s the only time that I get to see her, so she deserves everything.”

You could tell by her smile that she yearned for you to give her another chance, which caused you to look away from her gaze and give your attention back to the kitchen, leaving the two pairs alone and playing.

You had this strange feeling inside of you that yearned for her as well, but you couldn't say it out loud. You could never admit that you missed her, despised her, and still loved her. You noticed Natasha playing with another toy train with Riley as you brought three plates to the dining table. You enjoyed watching them play; it was one of your greatest joys.

You can't say that out loud either.

You kept your mouth shut as always and continued to become hysterical.

As the hours passed, Natasha was putting Riley to sleep in order to get back to her house before the storm hit. You had just finished picking up, which meant that you were prepared to head to bed as soon as the older woman departed. As you passed by your bedroom, you noticed that Riley's door was cracked open just a little bit.

You decided to give it a shot and observed the two girls conversing.

“Do you miss Mommy?" Riley inquired, her face stricken with sadness: "It hurts you to see it.

Natasha nodded, which wasn’t so surprising.

"I do," she said quietly, as if it were a dirty secret, and pushed some of Riley's hair away from her face. “But it’s over now, sweetheart. We both agreed to be with you, though. So you’ll always see me, okay?”

“You’ll never disappear?”

Natasha smiled, tears welling up in the brim of her eyelids as she softly kissed her daughter's forehead. This scenery made your heart clench, and you realized how much it hurts to lose someone you care about in this way. It hurts way too much, it’s almost insane that you feel this way.

“I will never disappear, baby. I promise.”

“Do you still love Mommy?”

Natasha chuckled, placing the teddy bear in between your daughter’s arms.

“I love her with all of my heart, Riles. I will always love your mother.”

This feels like a train wreck for you, and you absolutely hated it.

"I hope Mommy loves you too," Riley yawned, her eyes fluttering shut as slumber overtook her. Natasha sighed deeply and turned off the bedside lamp. You hurried downstairs and prepared her jacket for her before she could leave the bedroom, so you wouldn't have to talk to her when she leaves.

You turn your head when Natasha comes back down, rubbing her left eye tiredly before smiling sadly at you.

“You have a place to stay?” you asked, knowing that somewhere deep in your heart, you’ll always be concerned for her.

“Yeah, I’ll be in New York for a little while before I find a new job.”

A new job? Since when did she want a new job?

You couldn’t help but ask, “What do you mean by a new job?”

The older redhead looks at you briefly and gazes at the ground, replying quietly to your question. “I retired.”

“From being an Avenger?” she nodded. You never expected this from her, not in your damn life. Why would she quit now? Her being an Avenger revolved around her life, it was her first happiness before she met you. So why would she quit now? You can’t keep your mouth shut.

“Why?”

She tucks her hand into her pockets, looking at you with bright green eyes.

“Because I’m done being an Avenger,” she said. “I just… want to live a normal life.”

“H-How are you going to get a job? You’re a criminal everywhere, Nat. I don’t think it’s–”

“Tony will be sending me money every once a month,” she chuckled, taking a few steps closer to you. “I deserve every ounce of it, anyway. But while he does that, I’ll do my best to find a job. Probably work as a mechanic, who knows?”

You nodded, giving her a sidelong glance.

“You’re gonna have a hard time.”

“I know,” Natasha whispered, giving you a sad smile. “But I can do it.”

“I know you can.”

For a while, neither of you moved, until a thunderclap shook the sky, causing you to jump. You chuckled as you walked into the living room and sat on the edge of the couch.

“I’m sorry, I just don’t like the sound of… that.”

“I know,” she chuckled wholeheartedly because deep down inside of her, she knew everything about you. Likes and dislikes. “You’re still cute.”

“Don’t flirt with me like that.” you pointed out, straightening your voice.

“Don’t flirt like what?”

“Like you want me back.”

Natasha pushes back her hair – which you notice how short it was – and asked quietly, “You don’t want me to flirt with you?”

“Does it look like I want you to?”

"No," her heart clenches at the sound of your voice, making her more tense - which sometimes scares her because she doesn't like seeing you angry; it's one of her flaws. “But you know my answer, you know what I want.”

She can be too honest at times like this, too bold whenever she has the chance. You gave her a solemn look before turning away. Because showing your vulnerability to her will make you appear to want her as much as she does. But you want her, and you want her badly.

Natasha walks in front of you and kneels on the ground, softly touching your knee with her calloused hands. You look at her gesture but don't appear to move away from it. She looked at you with puffy cheeks and eyes that were more sorrowful than usual.

“Have you found someone else?”

You shake your head, she continued.

“Do you want me back?”

You shake your head once more, and this is when she lets out a quiet sympathetic laugh.

“You’re lying to me, Y/n.”

“I’m telling the truth,” you stated, pushing the tears away from your eyes. She tries to hold your hand, but you pull away from her grasp – showing a hurtful expression on her face. “Natasha, we can’t.”

“I promise I’ll be good to you this time…”

“That’s–” you let out a stressful sigh and pinch your nose bridge. “I don’t want to fight, okay? We both agreed to be civil for our daughter, so let’s just keep doing that.”

“I never stopped thinking about you.”

“Nat–”

"I still love you," her voice and touch become more desperate. "When we divorced, I never looked at anyone else in my life except you," she sniffled. “I never dared to touch a woman because I still love you. Did you know that? You have no idea how many times I've thought about you in a day, how many times I want to love you all over again - like you deserve to be loved."

You pushed her away as you turned your body away from her, more tears streaming down your cheeks. You've become weak once more, far too weak when it comes to her. Natasha tries to touch you, but she stays put.

“You’re being ridiculous,” you muttered, throwing your hands in the air. “Who asked you to be devoted to me after our divorce? You’re making yourself miserable because I’m never going to fall in love with you ever again!”

“You know what you’re saying is not true, Y/n,” Natasha shakes her head, biting her lower lip. “You know that’s not true.”

“You’re just a pain in the ass for not believing it then! God, you’re so hard to talk to.”

She mumbled, “Fine. Maybe I’m a pain in the ass, but at least I have never lied to you. I have been devoted to you since I first met you, and I never looked at anyone the moment I fell in love with you. You’ve become my whole world, my entire being. You are what I breathe and what I take, you are what I need when I go to bed and when I need to be loved. Every time I get back home from a mission, I crave your hugs. Because they only make me feel better when it’s you because it’ll always be you!”

You let out a hiccup, which you never expected, and watched Natasha’s throat bobbing as she controlled her tears. You were supposed to have a good night, but things got out of hand once more and you just painfully wanted to go to sleep and forget about how you two got here. But your emotions took over you, and it did for her as well.

“You were always gone, Natasha,” you sobbed, feeling your voice lighter as you hugged your torso. She turned her gaze away from you, knowing what she had done. “I respect what you do, but I needed you as well. I needed you to help me take care of Riley, I needed you when we were going broke. I needed you when Riley turned s-six, and I needed you when I couldn’t handle that cycle anymore.”

"But you weren't there," you sniffled, wiping your tears with the hem of your shirt. "You decided to spend more time with your friends at the pub, decided not to read my message when I needed money for the rent, and especially when it was our wedding anniversary! You didn’t give a damn about me and our marriage, you only cared when you were hurt! But what about me, Nat? What about me? I was always hurting when you were gone!”

“Baby…”

You lift a finger at her, letting out a sarcastic laugh. “Don’t call me that, you don't get to call me that.”

“I’m sorry–”

"I know you're a loyal woman," you said, smiling briefly. "I believe you would never cheat on me. But sometimes maybe I prefer you cheating on me so I have a reason to leave your stupid ass! You hurt me, Natasha. You're always causing me pain! And you know what’s worse? I still fucking love you!”

You tried standing up to avoid the agonizing silence, but two strong hands held your waist down, her head motioning to your chest. She sobbed alongside you, desperately kissing your neck. You tried to push her away, but you let her hand move to your torso until she wrapped her arms around you tightly. Natasha sobbed until your shirt was soaked in her tears.

"I'm here now," she said quietly, looking you in the eyes as she always does. “I’m here now and I’m so sorry you felt that way, darling. I’m sorry, okay? I’m really sorry for everything, I didn’t mean to hurt you this way. I just… I wanted what’s best for you a-and our beautiful daughter.”

You were aware of this. Of course, you were aware of this. Natasha would go out of her way for you and your daughter. She would move the moon for you, giving you what you needed until you could truly say you were satisfied. But money, even if it was luxurious, was not always the solution. It was her love that prevailed.

“We’re meant to be together,” she continues to sob, holding your face as she brings your forehead against hers. “You’re always going to be the first girl I’ll lay eyes on. I love you so much, darling. I love you too much to let you go.”

You shake your head, knowing that you could always come back to her with her sweet words and innocent touch - which you didn't want. But, knowing yourself too well, you desired that above all else in the world.

She took advantage of the opportunity to softly kiss your lips, letting out a quiet moan as she feels your lips after a long time of desperately wanting to taste you again. She draws your face in closer, refusing to let you go. She probes the depths of your mouth, re-memorizing you - as she always does. You couldn't push her away because you felt her tongue on the roof of your mouth. Natasha has captured your heart once more, and you know you don't want to let go.

The older woman pulled away with a smacking sound before whispering, “I fucked up bad, I know that now. But I promise you, I will be good to you this time, little girl. I promise, okay? I’m here now, I’m never going far away again.”

Give her a chance, explore the moment. You want her, you know it yourself.

You stared deeply into the wonders of her eyes, taking a moment of happiness. After months and months of sorrow, of mourning for that matter, you finally have her again – you needed to take it all in.

“I know,” you smiled, feeling more tears in your eyes. “I’m giving you another chance.”

Natasha gently pushes you back onto the couch and separates your legs so she can get in between them. She kisses you slowly and sensuously, her hands exploring the side of your waist until her fingers are hooked into your shorts. "I've thought about this moment, did you know that?" she pulls her lips away for a brief moment.

You moaned when you felt your shorts being pulled down from your legs, feeling the cold air hit your skin as you felt more of her open-mouth kisses on your jaw and all the way down to your neck. The redhead brought her thumb to your face cheek and made circular motions while staring down at you, smiling to herself. Finally, she had you once again. She couldn’t believe it.

“D-Do you want to do it here?” she asked hastily, after removing your undergarments. You nodded, looking from the side to find protection – which seems to be not in the living room since you don’t put those kinds of stuff in your house. And plus, you haven’t had sex in a while. “Baby, I don’t have a condom with me.”

"It's okay," you said, catching her lips and feeling her warm breath enter your mouth. She moaned lowly above you, unbuttoning her pants and pulling them down to her ankles. “You have to pull out, though.”

“Yeah,” she mumbled, her tongue darting on the skin of your neck, groaning to herself. “Oh, you make me so happy… You want me to fuck you here? Out in the open? What if our Riley–”

“She’s dead asleep,” you giggled, massaging her dick through her boxers as you received a long, strained moan from her, which turned you on even more. “You’re getting hard, Tasha…”

“Rub it, baby,” she whispers, rushing down her words. You squint your eyes to see an evident wet patch on her underwear, continuing to stroke your hand onto her covered cock. “Oh fuck, that’s it–Mmph… your hand f-feels so good.”

You take your time to stroke her cock through her boxers, watching her whimper and biting her lip to prevent letting out loud sounds wake your daughter up. You enjoyed doing this, watching the woman immensely falling apart for you, and the more you stroked her harder and faster, the more she rolls her hips down on you.

You began to ask, “You want to fuck me?”

“Uh-huh,” she muttered, her thumb circling your clit, smirking as you began to let out tiny moans. “Y-You like it when I touch you like this, kotenok?”

“Please–”

"You're so wet for me," she says softly as two of her fingers spread through your folds, almost entering your tight entrance. She shudders above you, then continues to finger your cunt until she is satisfied. “I’m gonna put it in now, okay? Let me just pull down my underwear.”

Her cock grew another inch after she removed her boxers. She almost sits up and strokes her thick length, watching her bulbous head turn red with torment. You observe her hand stroking her penis while your inner walls clench each time pre-cum dribbles on your lower stomach, a string connecting to your skin and to her head. She slides her hand beneath your shirt, gasping as she feels your nipple harden against her palm.

“Gonna break you in, again?” she chuckles, strongly kissing your lips. You held her face as the tip of her cock was at your entrance, moving the head up and down to gather more of your juices – which felt sensitive. “Shh, keep your voice down little girl, you’re gonna wake our daughter up.”

Once she slid inside of you, you and her moaned together as the air thickened around the room. Natasha holds your waist closer to hers, slowly ripping you apart once again. She stutters out a moan before pressing her lips on the corner of your mouth, pushing more of her length until both of your pelvises have touched.

“Fuck,” she whispers, looking down at both of your sex. “Y-Youre so tight, and so warm… you take my dick so good, little girl.”

“Tasha,” you moaned out her name as your voice got pitchier. “T-Too big.”

“You can take it,” Natasha mumbled as she slowly pulls out, pushing back in once again without any restraints. “Too small for my dick, huh?”

She continued this motion, slowly pulling out and pushing back in while peppering kisses all over your face. You scratched her back, wanting to hold onto something while she let out a hiss, but smirked because she liked it whenever you did that to her. The older woman starts to pick up an unusual pace since you both had to be quiet or else you would get caught red-handed.

“I like the way your pussy clenches around me,” Natasha grunted as she got turned on even more by the sloshing sounds coming down from your cunt. “You like this, huh? You like being fucked by me? Ruining you all over again? Tell me you like this…”

You gasped for air as you fluttered your eyes closed, feeling her thick cock pounding into you slowly. “I-I love this,” you mewled. “Go faster, Tash. Ruin my pussy.”

“Argh, you want me to ruin your pussy?”

“Uh-Huh…”

She withdraws her length from your pussy, slapping her head against your clit, causing you to moan aloud. “Okay, baby. I’ll ruin this fucking tight pussy.”

Natasha covers your mouth with her damp hand as she continues to roll her hips into you, the couch creaking and shifting slightly. She thrusts into you at a faster pace, your skin slapping together, filling the room with wet noises. She smirked, biting her own lip and containing her own pleasurable moans as she looked down at your sweaty face.

“Can’t c-control myself when I’m with you,” she whispers breathlessly, whimpering each time her head hits your spot. “Fuck, you’re taking me all in, huh? You’re such a good little girl, baby. Such a good little girl…”

"Ah!" you screamed into her hand as you felt her penis pistoning inside of you, the creaking of your couch becoming more audible, and you're sure Riley's room can hear it. You put your hand on her hips to slow her down, and she did. But she kept giving hard thrusts, moaning each time she was buried deep inside you.

“You make me want to bust my nut into you,” the woman panted hard, her hips making circular motions to keep maneuvering her cock inside of your depth walls. “Gonna remove my h-hand now, okay? Stay quiet.”

She slowly moves her hand away from your mouth and kisses your lips with such need, her hands moving up and down on your waist as she continues to fuck you on the couch, her ass clenching each time she hits the spot inside of you that she loved. She looked behind her shoulder to see if her daughter was awake, but she was glad she wasn't anywhere near both of you.

She continued to pound you hard into the cushions, lifting your hips to the side so she could go deeper into you.

“Ugh yeah,” she whined as she shut her eyes tightly. “Shit, shit shit… Take it all in, sweet girl. F-Fuck me!”

“You feel so good inside of me,” you let out a long moan, threading your fingers through her short hair. “Keep going, Tasha. K-Keep going.”

"Oh my fucking god, you're taking me so well," she begins, making the entire couch shake and creak loudly. She didn't care if anyone heard you both, but if her daughter awoke from the strange sound coming from the living room, she would quickly pull out. Despite knowing her daughter was a heavy sleeper, she continued to rock her hips back and forth until there were red marks on your thighs. “Take it, take it, take it…”

Your moans started to get louder and louder, and you were holding Natasha tightly from her back as you felt your inner walls being abused by her penis, her thick long dick. The woman starts to helplessly moan and kisses your mouth hard.

“I’m gonna fucking cum all over your stomach,” she whispers slowly to you, bringing your hips up and down to take her length all the way inside of you. “You wanna cum with me, baby doll? Wanna cum with me? Oh fuck, I’m going to blow–”

Natasha pulls out quickly as she presses the tip of her cock against your clit, furiously rubbing it to catch your orgasm. You grabbed her neck and screamed, "I'm cumming! I’m gonna cum–Oh my god, Nat… I’m gonna cum!”

“Me too, baby! I’m here now–shit!”

You roll your eyes back as you feel your legs twitching from your orgasm, the head of her cock rubbing up and down on your clit, intensifying your orgasm. As the world darkens around you, you arch your back, knowing that it has become this much for you. Natasha looks down at your face and pumps her cock hard, spitting thick sperm all over your cunt, coating your clit and folds. She lets out a deep moan and thrusts her dick into her hand as she continues to cum. Her thick sperm coated your cunt, but most of it was on your lower stomach.

Her balls contracted as she continued to pump herself. As soon as she slows down, she sighs heavily and hugs you from behind, kissing your reddened cheeks while smiling softly down at you. Natasha whispered, “That was amazing, baby girl. You did such a great job for me.”

"Thank you," you muttered as you fell asleep, too tired to speak and too tired to think. Natasha recognized this and decided to kiss you on the cheek one last time before standing up to find a blanket for the two of you, butt naked. She decides to slip her unhardened cock inside your vagina once she is comfortable with her position behind you and sleeps peacefully on your warm walls hugging her dick.

i got lazy at the end but hope you enjoyed this one!

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x yn #natasha romanoff x you #black widow x reader #black widow x you #natasha romanoff angst #natasha romanoff au #natasha romanoff smut #a's oneshots!

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hunterbunter3000 · 1 year

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Tbh the way you write Krueger gives me sugar daddy / obsessive vibes (not that I can complain). I love the idea of him being so obsessed to please sweetheart in any way she wants (personally I HC him as a service top switch, specially w the way you write him). But if you’re ever up to it I’d love some Krueger drabble (or ghost or könig bc they’re yummy too)

-🪿(hönk)

HÖNK BABES OMG

18+

You are so right with him being a service top 👏 ugh he would so eat her out until she passes out. Round after round, with his big ass hands clamped around her thighs and his thick tongue flicking against her overworked clit. AUGH he would cum so quickly because of her taste and moans. He would cum just from eating her out 💀💀

And he 10000000%% is obsessive with Sweetheart. He only thinks about Sweetheart 25/8 and all he wants to do is please her. He calls her "My little Goddess" for a reason ✨️ just touching her is a blessing to him. Touching her hand, he would crumble right then and there. He would do anything and EVERYTHING for this woman. He wants-- NEEDS-- to be around her all the time, or he will go INSANE. He's also pretty possessive with her. But Sweetheart shut that shit down, so he's only just a little teehee🤭 but yeah he becomes quite jealous when people talk to her. Don't touch her because you will lose a hand. And if you make a move? Oh, you're gonna end up either on a t-shirt or on a milk carton.

(I can go on and on with Krueger about being an obsessive freak with Sweets HAHA)

And hönk omg sugar daddy Krueger makes me want to fold😭 she wouldn't even ask him to be a sugar daddy, he would just do it himself. He LOVES spoiling her, even though she doesn't ask for it, he does it anyway. And of course she's thankful for it, she's not a brat. But that makes him buy MORE SHIT FOR HER

It's a cycle:

• Krueger buys something for Sweets

• Sweets yells at him

• Sweets says thank you and smiles

• Krueger gets the happy juice in his brain

And then it starts over 💀

He's even bought her an apartment close to his, but she wanted to stay in her old family home, so he said "okay. I'll just live closer to you" and she's like-- w h a t 🧍‍♀️

And OH he would so buy toys for her. Like vibrators. He bought one that he could control from afar and that was such a fun day LOL When he's not around, like on a mission, he made a mold out of his cock for her 💀 and yk... she uses it sometimes HWHEHSHES Krueger asked her to send a video of her using it and she does. She was so embarrassed and shy when she did it. Wearing one of Krueger's shirts and ONLY his shirt-- and her hair out (he loves seeing her hair down) and she's on the bed with the toy and she lubes it up, cause it's fucking huge. AND IT HAS A SUCTION CUP LOL so she just slaps on the bed frame and rubs it on her slit.

Fuck, and Krueger is just watching it like it's the last thing on earth. He is so FUCKING HARD and he wants to be there and fuck her himself. He hears her little whimper when the toy prods her hole. Sweet's is bent on the bed and holding a pillow, her eyebrows knitted and tears already springing in her eyes. Omg that makes Krueger go FERALLL

And once she backs her thick ass back into it, she squeals so loudly and starts to twitch. "Fuck... I think I just came..." GIRL I THINK KRUEGER JUST CAME WHEN YOU SAID THAT WTF-- she starts to grind on it, as much as she can fit, and starts to bounce on it. Her moans and whimpers flow through the speaker of his phone and other soldiers are just frozen and turned on, and are scared to shit to tell him that everyone can hear what's playing on his phone 💀(he honestly doesnt give a shit, hes too engrossed on the video) and Graves comes over, pissed at Krueger because it's extremely distracting whatever is on his phone. Graves was about to speak until he saw Sweetheart fucking herself on the biggest dildo he has ever seen. He has never seen her moan and whimper like that-- like gurl where has this side been?? And he just stands there with his eyes big and mouth gaping. His dick twitches in his pants and he feels light-headed. The fucking wet sounds of her stretched pussy and her low babbles and her bottom half jiggling with every bounce is straight torture for the both of them.

"Fuuucckkkk Krueger, if this is the size of your actual fucking cock I don't think I can take it..." Sweetheart whimpers out. Graves is like- SORRY WHAT

THAT BIG THING IS A MOLD OF KRUEGER'S COCK??? It's literally making a small bulge in her stomach when she sits up and it's not even in all the fucking way. Krueger growls, his knee bouncing like CRAZZYY "You'll take it, baby. You will." He mumbles to himself. Omg he's so turned on its making him unstable.

She goes faster, the bed frame creaking with her backing up on it. She gets louder and her thighs start shaking so damn much. "Cumming... Cumming!" She bites the pillow hard as her pussy creams around the dildo. She makes such a mess on the bed frame omg (Krueger and Graves wanted to lick it all clean) and she's breathing heavily, trying to calm herself down. Once she does, she gets up to get her phone, they can see that she's a bit sweaty and eyes teary and low. She wipes her face and she sighs before speaking. "I can't believe I did this. Fuck I'm still shaking. Just-- be safe Krueger." And the video ends. The silence is THICCKKKK AFTERWARDS LMAO

But I am making a smut fic between Krueger and Sweetheart, so keep an eye out for that!

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ohdeerfully · 2 months

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hi!! i absolutely love your writing, you write alastor so so well and i absolutely devoured everything you have posted... would you by any chance be open to writing alastor with a f!reader who has an eating disorder/anorexia? <3 it's a triggering topic so i totally understand if you'd rather not! 💖 i've just recently been stressed about feeling like i need to lose weight again despite already having lost quite a lot and it just feels. never enough, so i would much appreciate some comfort! thank you for sharing your writing with us! 💖

hi my love!! i know you requested this some time ago, and i hope youve been feeling better (,: i also struggle with this type of thing so i 100% dont mind writing about it, but just know that you are super beautiful and worth every sweet treat and meal you get!!! mwah mwah mwah i hope you like the story ^.^

Ma Moitié

Alastor x Reader (fluff/comfort)

TW: eating disorder!!! alastor is def OOC hes being a sweetie pie join my discord!

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You always had a poor relationship with your body and food, in life and in death. You went through periods of weight loss, gain, loss again—some seemingly never ending cycle that no amount of therapy has managed to halt.

Your mind was currently weighing the pros and cons of eating the slice of cake offered to you by Charlie. She was celebrating the arrival of a few new residents, the first to arrive since the last extermination. The news really helped the hotel garner some attention, that plus the fancy new renovation Lucifer himself helped with… needless to say, Charlie was thrilled. So, she threw a little party. You had been standing awkwardly near the doorway, trying to find an opportunity to slip away from the small party. But you doubted you could escape without your absence being noticed; there really weren't that many people here to begin with.

You had accepted the cake out of sheer politeness, but you now just held the plate loosely in your hands, chewing on the inside of your cheek as you thought. You’ve been feeling particularly… susceptible to the calories in food lately. You considered the fact that you hadn’t eaten much today—or, honestly, the whole week for that matter. It shouldn’t hurt to just have one slice of cake. Just this once.

But… still…

You frowned down at the cake. Picking up the plastic fork, you took a tiny chunk from it and lifted it to your lips. Your lips quivered as the food touched your tongue, and you felt sick as you chewed. You managed to swallow after an unnecessarily long few seconds of chewing, and you continued to just stare down at your plate. You didn’t think you’d be able to handle another bite.

Niffty had seen the sickly expression on your face, and loudly started throwing questions at you. Were you sick? Did you hate the party? Why didn’t you like the cake she made? Her loud voice was growing in volume, and catching the attention of a few other demons in the room. You tried various ways to shush her, attempting to answer her questions politely, but you felt your heart rate pick up at the obviously growing number of eyes.

“I’m not incredibly fond of sweets myself,” You heard that radio-afflicted voice pipe up from behind. You couldn’t help but jump at the unexpected presence, but you turned your head with a light smile. Alastor was looking curiously down at Niffty and you.

“Ah, yeah, the cake’s great, I just… don’t like dessert that much…” You lied. You actually really liked cake, but it had been a long time since you were actually able to enjoy it without feeling intensely guilty about it. The tiny demon made a fussy comment about how nobody appreciated her and all of her hard work, stomping away. Her mood didn’t last, though, immediately getting caught up in cleaning something you couldn’t even see.

You turned your head to thank Alastor, but you saw his smile drop slightly as he looked at you. The demon bent at the waist to lean down, his mouth near your ear and his usually boisterous voice quieted to a whisper. “Is everything alright, mon coeur?”

You felt your face heat up, both at the words he spoke and the proximity. You and Alastor had been quietly ‘official’ for quite a while now, but you weren’t sure if you’d ever get used to the small gestures of affection from the Radio Demon. It felt weird if you thought about it too long.

“I’m okay, just…” You weren’t sure how open you wanted to be about how you were feeling. Alastor knew about your poor body image and eating habits, but he truthfully never really knew how to go about comforting you. Plus, you felt as if your personal struggles were trivial to a literal Overlord of Hell. You didn’t want to bother him with your own shit.

“I’m fine,” You finally decided. You could tell Alastor knew you were lying, with that furrow of his eyebrows, but he stood up straight and didn’t push. You sighed and gently placed the plate of cake down on a small entryway table by the door you had been lurking near.

“I’ll get us out of here,” He declared with a wide smile, and he strode forward to where Charlie stood talking to the group of new guests. She knew Alastor was approaching due to the look of horror that slowly crossed the new demon’s faces. You couldn’t quite hear what they were saying, but it looked like she briefly scolded Alastor for being so damn intimidating for no reason.

They chatted for a moment, and you could hear the Radio Demon’s obnoxious laughter from across the room. He gestured to himself, then to you, to which Charlie looked in your direction. You shot her a small smile. She smiled back, nodded, and turned away to continue talking to the new residents—who all had been slowly inching away from Alastor. They looked incredibly relieved when he left the group.

He gave you a grin and wordlessly threaded his arm around yours, linking you at the elbow. You lifted your hand to give his upper arm an appreciative squeeze as you left the room. Your eyes lingered on the abandoned slice of cake as you walked away, feeling guilty in more ways than one.

Alastor had led you to your room, releasing your arm and leaning his body weight on his cane as he looked down at you. You glanced up at him, then back down, pursing your lips as you stared at anything else in the room.

“I hate when demons lie to me,” He said, eyes narrowed. Of course, you knew he wasn’t truly mad at you. Maybe frustrated. “What’s wrong.” It was more like a statement than a question. A demand.

You sat heavily down on the edge of your bed, fiddling with your fingers.

“I don’t know, Al,” You muttered. You hated this. “I just… You know how I get sometimes.” It somehow felt so silly, telling him about this.

Alastor had sat down next to you, his arm wrapped over your shoulder and a clawed hand rubbing up and down your forearm. You could tell his touch was light, awkward, unsure—but the gesture was appreciated nonetheless. While Alastor typically had no problem overstepping boundaries and shoving demons around purely to aggravate them, he obviously had no real idea how to be intimate and kind. But he tried for you.

He took his other hand and slipped it under your legs, swiftly lifting you and pulling you further up the bed. He leaned his body against the headboard, and dragged you over to lay your torso against his own.

“I don’t understand why you worry about all this, dear,” He mused, his fingers threading through your hair. His other hand graced past your stomach, which caused you to subconsciously flinch away. You felt his hand pause, but he didn’t mention it.

“I wish I didn’t have to,” You responded slowly, your cheek squished against his chest. “But I’ve dealt with this since I was alive. I feel like it’ll never get better.”

“Dearest, you have a whole eternity here,” He mused in response. He placed a finger under your chin and craned your head to meet his gaze. “You need to be strong to survive down here; to stay sane. A healthy body leads to a healthy mind.”

Of course Alastor was always thinking about strength and survival. He was an Overlord, after all. You didn’t respond to him, but you kept looking at him as he spoke. There was an odd look in his eyes as he talked.

“Plus,” He continues. His words were slow, and his mouth moved as if the words tasted unnatural on his tongue. This uncertainty that touched the Radio Demon’s voice was… rare, to say the least. “I want to see ma moitié happy. I am… incredibly devoted to you.”

Your ear pricked when you noticed the radio frequency in his voice completely dropped when he spoke the words. That look in his eyes—you finally recognized it as some odd sense of passion and endearment. An emotion that you could tell confused him, with the strain in his brow as he examined you. He meant the words he said, no matter how unnatural they felt leaving his mouth.

You rested your head back down on his chest. You knew this conversation wouldn’t “cure” you or anything, but you hoped that maybe you could think back on his words everytime your hands shook as you held a fork to your mouth. Of all demons in Hell, Alastor’s opinion was probably the most important to you, and you knew his devotion wouldn’t halt because of a few pounds; Alastor had to be deeply, deeply passionate about you to even let you lay on top of him like this.

You only hummed in response, and simply rested your head back against his chest. You hugged your arm tightly against him to try to convey that you appreciated his words, but you didn’t really know what to say.

“Would you join me for breakfast tomorrow?” Alastor asked after a few minutes of comfortable silence. “I know this wonderful place that I frequent for coffee…”

You thought for a moment, again weighing the pros and cons; a habit that you struggled to drop when it came to meals. Your mind was buzzing with thoughts of what kind of food might be there, and if you should ration out the meals for the rest of the day. But, you felt the thoughts melt away when Alastor’s hand rubbed a comforting circle against your cheek, and then trailing down towards your shoulder in a light squeeze.

“Okay,” you finally said. It wouldn’t hurt to have a decent meal for once. You pulled yourself up onto your elbows again to look at Alastor. “Sounds awesome.”

His smile twisted up, his teeth peeking through a small gap in his lips. His head inched forward, but then paused, and you could tell his mind was racing with various thoughts. You waited for him to decide and, after a few moments, he closed the gap and lightly pressed his lips against yours. It was brief, as most intimate contact with him was, but you enjoyed it while it lasted.

“You will always be my only weakness,” Alastor admitted tenderly. “The most captivating demon in all of Hell.”

You couldn’t stop the shy smile that spread across your face at his words. You sputtered out some awkward response, to which he simply hummed and smiled at. He closed his eyes and rested his head back against the headboard, his fingers still playing with your hair gently.

You followed suit, resting your head against his chest and closing your own eyes. You didn’t even realize how tired you were, too caught up in the rare intimacy with Alastor. You let your worries of breakfast fade away, choosing to just enjoy the warmth of his body so close to yours.

#ohdeerfully #alastor #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #alastor hazbin hotel #fluff #comfort #eating disorder #TW: eating disorder #TW: disordered eating #disordered eating

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