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#nah I like his ghost hair more because JUST LOOK AT THE COLOR
simitx · 6 months
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Time flies so quickly and unnoticed, but I couldn't miss the 9th anniversary!!<D
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flower-biter · 7 days
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15-21 April 2024
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Maybe I am, Costar - what about it?
Got my glasses and contacts in my updated prescription, so I can seeeee - both how beautiful spring is, and have an existential crisis when I see the news alerts on my phone. (It’s just a lot of internal screaming lately. Try not to panic. Do what I can. It’s a nice day. I am alive. I am alive. I am alive. Enjoy what I can, while I can).
Ghost stories class is over (and as a whole, it was...meh). I chickened out on asking out the cute person, mostly because their mother (who also attended the class and seems really cool) was like, right there, and that was not a conversation I wanted to have with an audience, and also while they are really cute and I enjoyed their insights and want to get to know them better, and am glad they have a good relationship with their mom, it does strike me as a little weird? I did not ask them out, but I did get their social handle and we followed each other, so…maybe later?
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It was so hot this week, it got up to 91ºF/32ºC. Ugh. Time to break out the iced lavender oat milk latte, probably the gayest thing I could order (and so tasty). But everything is blooming and I keep catching whiffs of flowers and sweetgrass, and of course, summer fruits are coming into season, so I can’t complain too much.
The mother of my childhood best friend (the friend who is now pregnant with twins) sent me a bunch of pictures she found of us as kids, from about 3-6 years old: on our kids bowling league team, playing soccer, swimming in an inflatable pool, playing dress-up, laughing at a church gathering. It’s so weird to look back on these pictures and realize I have very few actual memories of these events, and to think about how different I turned out as an adult compared to what was clearly expected of me. It is funny seeing how much the same some things are, though - I still hate being hugged by strangers for pictures. And Jess and I are still best friends.
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Trivia night, last one at this brewery for a while. Old Slavic man at the bar was openly staring and I thought he was going to comment on my hair but he told me “oh, you’re such a beautiful girl, you don’t need to drink to get attention!” Which. I don’t follow that logic, but okay. Good thing that’s not why I drink, and I told him so. Of course he couldn’t leave it at that. He followed me from the bar to my seat to tell me his life's story (divorced, of course), that he’s a Buddhist (good for you) and to call him if I ever need help (???). Wanted to give me his number and I told him nah, don’t bother, I won’t use it. “Oh, you’re not lesbian are you?” Uh. I don’t know if I’m safe to answer that question. Would that actually deter him, or just make him try harder? Or get violent? He finally left. But why. Why are men like this. What is it about me that looks like I welcome these weird interactions??? How do I disable it???
And then guy doctor friend cornered me after trivia to ask “is there something between us?” Nononono I cannot keep having these conversations. We are just bros. (He said that it was mutual, thankfully, but it was a weird conversation to have.) Honestly, I don’t know how people look at me and see a straight woman. I don’t know how to look gayer without plastering myself in rainbows, which…is not really my style. But in what world is this not the look of a raging dyke??
I don’t mind the attention from women, obviously. I took myself to lunch and another solo woman seated in a booth near me shouted “I like your earrings! And your hair! And your glasses! You’re just so pretty!” (which, thanks, most of those are things I have control over so you're complimenting my mind/taste/choices and therefore I enjoy that comment) and I got to compliment her on her gorgeous colorful sundress in return! And the server was so sweet (more “darlin’” and “honey”) and wished me an “absolutely beautiful” day. (The whole interaction really drove home the thing that "Americans can be stupid friendly, but especially those in the South" like. Yeah. That stereotype is true). but anyway, I love women.
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Found out the local university does free planetarium shows on alternating Sunday afternoons! I’ll definitely have to go check those out, I haven’t been to a planetarium in way too long and could use another thing to be more curious about.
It’s so nice to have a relaxed weekend between trips. Saturday I got to sleep in, then met up with a friend first thing at a local farm to pick strawberries and catch up on gossip. Took myself out to brunch at my favorite coffee shop, then washed the strawberries and prepped them for storage. Ate way too many of them already, whoops (but they’re SO sweet and juicy and delicious; there’s nothing as tasty as sun-warmed, in-season, just-picked-it-myself fruit). Did some house work and lazed around with the cat. Dad’s back from Germany, and it’s frankly a little insulting to see how affectionate Butterball is with him, following him around the house like a puppy and chirping at him. Butterball may be my cat, but dad works from home and is clearly Butterball’s person. Hmph.
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Today has also been gloriously relaxed, another late morning. Did laundry. Made french toast with brioche from the farmers’ market and topped with yesterday’s strawberries. I don’t normally like sweet things for breakfast, but it was delicious. Crocheted a bit - I had to frog the sweater and start over because I realized I was somehow two stitches short on the row. Now I’ve made it one stitch too long. (How?? asdfghjk) But since it’s for a sweater that I’ll have to layer (big open stitches), and it’s cotton, I’d rather it be a little bit big to account for shrinking (and also I don’t want to start it over AGAIN) so. One stitch too wide it is, then.
I’ll be in Charleston next weekend for work, so I’m going to relish in this slow weekend. Try to read (I finally got a copy of The Traitor Baru Cormorant from my library and need to just. Dive in and get into it. Come on, brain, work with me here). Work on the crochet projects I’ve been neglecting. Actually fold my laundry the same day I take it out of the dryer instead of letting it wrinkle in the hamper overnight (ha! ambitious). Write a newsletter and schedule some social media posts for work. Play a game of scrabble with mum. Try not to doomscroll.
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Well. Onward.
last week
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I think Ghost would look better with lighter eyebrows and with hair more similar to Samuel's from his livestreams (less.poofy from your model). Absolutely no hate, you do what you like. I'm just sharing my opinion and I adore your renditions
Mmmm maybe 🤔 if I found a hair that looked closer to Samuel's I would try it, but I have to work with what I have...
Now the eyebrows is another thing, the face shape I use (that resembles Samuel's) has BLACK painted eyebrows, so I overlay another skin over it to add lighter eyebrows then. Sorry if I don't make sense, technical vocabulary is beyond me.
And about the hair color I based myself on the scene where Simon takes the mask off and we see the back of his head, maybe it's just me but I think it looked like he's dirty blonde/light brown.
And about the poofy hair... I hc he lets it grow because a certain someone tangles her fingers in it and he likes it 🤭 Nah, I just like how it looks.
Thank you for the ask! ❤️
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"You are officially in charge! Seeya!"
“Wait just a damn minute!” Pyro snapped as Shinobi bolted for the door.  Between the toddler climbing up his back and methodically mashing peanut butter into his hair, and the five-year old wrapped around his calf, Pyro could not stand up to give chase.  But with a quick flick of his wrist, a barrier of fire rolled down across the doorway. 
“You can’t play with fire in here!  Think of the children!” Shinobi exclaimed. 
“Try me,” Pyro grinned.  He would drop the barrier if any of the herd of mutant children that filled the rec room got too close.  He’d probably be fast enough.  “No way in hell are you ducking out and leaving me alone with this!”
“There’s no need for us both to suffer!  I obviously wouldn’t know the first thing about caring for children, so I’ll just – wait, why am I even arguing with you?  Shinobi suddenly dropped, intangible, through the floor.
“I’ll tell Storm!”  Pyro yelled after him, extinguishing the fire wall.  They had both been assigned to mutant child baby-sitting duty while the rest of the crew battled their way to another stranded group.  Why they – or rather, he - had been deemed inessential personnel for a combat mission, when Pyro’s abilities were all about mayhem and destruction, was a mystery.  He suspected that he was being punished for suggesting that Emma just psychically put the little brats to sleep.
Shinobi’s head popped back up through the floor, glaring up at Pyro.
“Don’t be a snitch!”
“Don’t expect me to cover your back if you fuck me over!” Pyro snapped back.  “We both got sat at the kiddy table today, we’re both doing it!”
“Fuck me over,” repeated the toddler, giggling, and continuing to massage a handful of peanut butter against Pyro’s scalp.  God damn, and he’d put so much work into gelling the curl out of his hair, too. 
“Are you a ghost?”  The five-year old, a green-colored little girl with odd suction cups at the tips of her fingers, was staring wide-eyed at Shinobi.  She uncurled herself from Pyro’s leg and stood up.
“Yes,” Shinobi said, rising up out of the floor.  “I’m the the ghost who eats little children that don’t behave.”  The little girl’s lip trembled ominously.
“Nah, he’s a funny ghost!”  Pyro broke in.  “Like Casper!  Or that slime thing from Ghostbusters.”  Would the children even know those references?  This latest batch of mutants was from Thailand.  “Look, you can chuck things right through him!”
Pyro tossed a crayon through the still-intangible Shinobi.
This was the pebble that started the avalanche, because soon every child in the room was happily throwing things through Shinobi, who stood scowling with his arms crossed.
“What?  You’re not even getting your suit wrinkled, which is more than I can say for myself.”  Pyro was running to take a shower the very instant the rest of the Marauders brought their smug  asses back to the ship. 
“Ugh.  Now I understand Father’s stance on children.  Which is basically don’t.  I need a cocktail,” Shinobi grimaced, making his way over to the counter.
“What’s a cocktail?  I wanna cocktail!”  A small boy, around primary school age, piped up.  He had a pair of tiny wings on his back that fluttered excitedly under his shirt.
“Ha!  Maybe you should give him one, Shinobi.  It would probably quiet the little blighters down.”  A little fruit-flavored “night-night” juice would make their job so much easier.
“Tempting, but I think Storm would kill us both.”  Shinobi was pouring various colored liquids into a mixture.  The winged boy and the sucker-hand girl had followed him in, watching intently.
“Can we make one?  Pleeeeeeaaaase?”  The girl’s eyes, already dark and watery, seemed to grow even larger as her faced scrunched up.
“It’s for grown-ups, love,” Pyro called over to her.
“I suppose I could make a child-friendly version,” Shinobi mused.  “Harry used to do that for me when I was at the Hellfire club and Father was busy.  I usually went right to sleep after.  Come to think of it, I’m not entirely sure he gave me child-friendly drinks.”  Shinobi paused, looking at the two children.
“Alright, if I show you how to make a Shirley Temple, will you promise to be quiet and behave for the rest of the afternoon?”
“Yeeeees!” The children chorused, despite probably having no idea what (or who ) a Shirley Temple was.
Meanwhile, things were getting chaotic over by Pyro’s spot on the couch.  Two of the older children were now beating each other with pillows, which was safe, but were also knocking things off tables, which was not so safe.  There was a game of Tag going on that would probably soon end in tears.  Another toddler was smearing melted chocolate across the wall – at least Pyro hoped it was chocolate – while the one on his back had given up his hairstylist aspirations and was now kicking at Pyro’s side and making growling noises.
“Okay, that’s enough of that!”  Pyro swept the kid off, and planted him on the floor.
“Imma tiger!” The boy declared.
“Live the dream, kid.”  Pyro stood up to gesture at the children.  “Okay, knock all that shit off!  It’s story-time!”  He put a certain amount of authoritative menace into his voice, pretending he was on a Brotherhood bank job.  Putting on a movie would have been much easier, but the only TV in the room had already fallen victim to a particularly rowdy fight over Encanto vs. Sonic the Hedgehog.
“I don’t want a story!”  One of the pillow-fighting children protested.
“Tough shit, story-time is mandatory!”  Pyro punctuated this with a blossom of flame that he shaped into a skull, and damn if that didn’t get the kids’ attention.  Running, fidgeting, and vandalism paused while the children gaped at him.
“Now then.”  Pyro sat down primly, pulling out a battered paperback, and began to read:
“The unicorn lived in a lilac wood, and she lived all alone. She was very old, though she did not know it, and she was no longer the careless color of sea foam, but rather the color of snow falling on a moonlit night. But her eyes were still clear and unwearied, and she still moved like a shadow on the sea.”
As he read aloud, he wove a fire tapestry in the air, with the delicate unicorn prancing among the trees.  It was heavily ripped-off inspired from the animated movie, but none of the children seemed to mind.  They were probably too young to have seen it, anyway.  They just stared up in awe as Pyro let a butterfly sculpted out of flame flutter over their heads. 
In the kitchen, Pyro could hear quiet giggling and liquid splashing, while Shinobi explained to the children the golden ratio for cocktails. 
And for about ten minutes, all was well.
Then a girl with wolf-like features leaned over and bit the arm of the boy sitting next to her, and all hell broke loose again.
(OOC: Once again, I have Pyro as a fan of The Last Unicorn, because I personally love it. But what the hell, he'd probably love the tragic romance aspect of it, even while he tells everyone that he's just into that Red Bull made of fire.)
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jikookiekosmos · 3 years
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Stay With Me || jjk
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➥Pairing: best friend!jungkook/reader, husband!jungkook/reader
➥Summary: Being married to Jungkook was everything you’d wished for and more. There wasn’t a problem the two of you couldn’t tackle together, and building this life with the person you loved most was all you could ask for. But when a ghost from your past returns and threatens to pull you two apart in whatever way they can, will things still be the same?
➥Genre: established relationship, heavy angst (I’m so sorry), smut, fluff, hurt/comfort
➥Rating: 18+
➥Words: ~14.2k (more of a one shot than a drabble I know, oops)
Before you continue there are darker themes explored in this drabble; please read at your own risk. Appropriate warnings are listed below.
➥Content Warnings: POV switches, feelings of anxiety from being in danger, jungkook is protective (and for good reason), we see a pissed off hoseok, (tw: harassment, violence, implied/attempted kidnapping, reader gets injured), yoongi & jimin to the rescue (bless them), jungkook is pissed off (again for good reason), jungkook cries, reader also cries, jungkook has feelings of insecurity and not being good enough, they have ✨very emotional sex✨ up against a wall, cursing (fuck is said a lot), slight hair pulling, fingering (very brief), jungkook has a big dick, unprotected sex (safe sex is great sex), dirty talk, rough sex, cumming inside, aftercare, jungkook is actually the sweetest, reader and jk are so in love with each other it hurts, also jk saying ‘only for you’ is a thing i started and can’t stop now oops except there’s a twist this time around
A/N: hello! This is part of my Only for You (OFY) Drabble series, but it can be read as a stand-alone! However, I would highly recommend reading OFY beforehand so as to better understand the relationships between these characters since there’s a lot of history behind everything that will make more sense. (I also mentioned this in the post for OFY but for those who haven’t read it, the Kun in the story isn’t referring to any other irl person specifically, it was just a name I chose to make the initial story easier to write.)
The POV switches between the reader and a few of the characters, but this will always be indicated by the name in the switch being bolded (i.e. you or Jungkook will be in bold, etc.).
I always do this but thank you to @dntaewithluv​ for keeping me sane during the writing process and giving me feedback as well as the motivation to continue when I feel discouraged, I love you so much 💜
I’ve written a few other drabbles and will list them below, along with a general timeline:
Use My Best Colors For Your Portrait - ~6 months after OFY
When I Dream Of You - ~1 year after OFY
This fic takes place a few months after the dream drabble. I welcome feedback, so if you ever want to talk to me about my writing, please do! I hope that if you read this, you enjoy it~
➥OFY Spotify Playlist (songs I listened to for inspo)
➥Series Masterlist
➥All Works Masterlist
taglist: @inlovewiththemoonn @diorkookie @swee3tcreature​ @sugaslittlekookies​ @moonchild1​ @bangtanhome​ 
⊱──────── ✬ ✬ ✬ ────────⊰
Visiting Jungkook at the bar during his shifts had become one of your favorite pastimes over the last few years. And not just because you got to see him, but also because it gave you a chance to get closer to some of his - and now your - friends as well.
Take tonight for example: you stopped by on your way home from work, and everything happened like it usually did. Jungkook’s smile was typically the first thing to greet you when you walked through the door before he and Jimin got into a playful bickering match about bar duties.
You parked yourself in your usual stool at the bar and watched the scene before you unfold - Jimin tossing one of the bar towels to Jungkook, who caught it with ease, all the while mumbling ‘less distraction and more action, Kook.’ Jungkook slung the towel over his shoulder before making a big show out of walking over to you.
“Hey pretty lady, what can I get for you tonight?” Jungkook’s voice was dripping with charm and it made you giggle. He leaned across the bar, resting his forearms on the wood. Even when he was just standing here in a plain black t-shirt with his dark hair curling in front of his eyes you still thought he was the most ethereal person you’d ever seen.
You hummed. “Hmm, I think I’ll have just a water, thanks.” Jungkook was already moving to fix your beverage before you even finished. “Do you always greet people like this,” you teased him as he sat the glass down in front of you.
He was wiping his hands on the towel still perched on his shoulder. “Nah, I only save it for the special ones. I am a married man, after all.”
You giggled again and he reached further across the bar to give you a quick kiss before being interrupted by Jimin again.
“You two are adorable, I love that, but I really could use some help over here, Kook!”
Jungkook playfully rolled his eyes before he excused himself to tend to his actual job. You just sat and observed while you drank, looking at him with loving eyes. He was really in his element here and it showed. All his customers were always happy patrons because he treated them all well.
Yeah, everything was playing out as it normally did on nights like these.
What you weren’t expecting, however, was for that to change.
On your way to find Yoongi so you could stop by and chat with him before heading home, you passed by a booth where a few rowdy men were seated. You tried to slip past them and pay them no mind-
-until one of them caught you by the wrist.
You froze. You wondered if maybe this was someone you knew and had possibly offended by not saying hello, but one look at the table let you know you’d never seen these 3 men before in your life.
“Hey, where you off to in a rush, baby?” The pet name made your skin crawl and you wanted nothing more than to just slink away and pretend like this never happened. But it was happening, the man’s tight grip on your wrist a reminder of that.
One of the other booth members spoke up. “Yeah, why not have a seat with us and talk for a bit? You look like you’re in need of some company.”
You shook your head and tried to muster a small smile so you could turn them down easy. You’d read and heard way too often about moments like these that could turn out badly if you acted a certain way.
“No thank you, I was just on my way out,” you hoped that would be the end of it, but the man holding your wrist wasn’t having it. He jerked you down to where you were seated right beside him in the empty space of the booth, making you whimper in pain when you hit the seat hard. His other friends laughed boisterously at your distress.
You situated yourself and looked up to see if you could spot someone, anyone around that you knew. You were unfortunately at the back corner of the bar, since Yoongi’s office was around here.
You tried to get up and make a break for it, but the man pulled you down again. “C’mon sweetheart, we don’t wanna hurt you. We just wanna talk, that’s all.”
Before you could respond, another voice cut through.
“Hands off,” the voice was low and stern, making all heads at the booth turn. When you looked up you saw Hoseok standing above you, arms crossed and looking pissed.
“Hoseok,” you breathed out, grateful that he was working the floor tonight and had stopped by before the situation escalated.
Hoseok didn’t say another word as his eyes drifted down to you quickly before glaring at the man still holding on to you.
“Lighten up, man, we’re just trying to have some fun-”
“I saw the whole thing and she’s clearly not wanting to engage in your idea of ‘fun’ so again: hands off.” Hoseok’s fingers flexed around his forearm, and apparently that was all the warning they needed.
The man let go of you and shoved you away from him, almost making you fall to the ground if Hoseok hadn’t steadied you. He wrapped an arm around you before calling out.
“Joon, Jin, need a hand here!”
Within seconds, the bodyguards of the establishment - also friends of yours - were at the table, looking as intimidating as ever. The 3 men still seated were starting to look a lot less pleased about the ordeal.
“I think these 3 have had it for the night,” Hoseok stated, starting to walk the both of you away so your friends could work their magic. You looked back at them one last time, just barely catching their interaction, which consisted of Seokjin promptly putting one of the men in his place when he tried to throw a punch.
When Hoseok had you seated in an empty booth at the other end of the bar, he knelt down beside you.
“Hey. You ok?” His voice had lost all its frightening timbre, now laced with nothing but concern. You didn’t realize you were still a little shaky until you noticed yourself trembling. You nodded, the best answer you could give right now.
Hoseok patted your knee before he stood up. “Stay here, I’m going to go get Kook-”
You reached out lightning fast to grab onto his sleeve before you pleaded “Don’t.”
Hoseok’s brows furrowed in confusion. “What, why not?”
“I don’t- I don’t want him to worry.” You were telling the truth; Jungkook had been on edge lately, and things were finally starting to get somewhat back to normal. If you didn’t have to add to that worry, you didn’t want to.
Hoseok’s frown deepened. “Y/N-”
“There you are!”
That voice that always managed to make your heart flutter only made you panic more in this instance. Jungkook was walking over to your booth quickly with a huge smile on his face, waving to the two of you. Hoseok moved out of the way so Jungkook could see you more, and you tried your best to smile back.
“Hey, I’ve been looking all over for you,” Jungkook addressed you as he pushed his hair out of his face. “I thought you went to go talk to Yoongi, but he said he hadn’t seen you yet.”
“Yeah, I was just on my way, but I ran into Hoseok-”
“Y/N,” Hoseok warned. Jungkook’s smile turned into one of confusion.
“What’s going on,” Jungkook was quick to ask before you could respond. It was then that he fully noticed how you were seated, somewhat curled into yourself.
“You need to tell him,” Hoseok’s eyes were burning into yours, and Jungkook felt a small pit of unease settle in his stomach. He knelt down beside you, similar to how Hoseok had done moments prior.
“Angel, hey, talk to me. What’s this about?” Jungkook took one of your hands in his and shook it slightly before placing a kiss on the back of it.
“It’s nothing, really-”
“Some guy put his hands on her.” Hoseok clearly was over you beating around the bush.
“What,” Jungkook’s tone was slipping into one you didn’t recognize and for good reason: he sounded furious. His hand tightened around yours.
Hoseok nodded, Jungkook’s attention on him now. “Yeah, I’m glad I noticed. Saw some dude grab her wrist and pull her down into the booth with them.”
Jungkook was up on his feet, hand disappearing from yours.
“What the fuck, where did they go,” he started to walk off but Hoseok held him back.
“Joon and Jin already took care of it, don’t worry. But I still just thought you should know.” Hoseok patted Jungkook on the shoulder and you watched as his body, still visibly tense, relaxed somewhat.
“I gotta get back to work, you can take a little time though, yeah?” Hoseok started walking off after giving you one last look, almost as if he was saying sorry but you knew he did the right thing.
Jungkook took a deep breath before finally looking back at you, his face softening instantly. He slid into the seat across from you, placing his palms on the table as he looked down.
“Koo-”
“Are you ok, at least,” his voice was low, but you could still hear it just over the faint tunes of the jukebox.
“I’m fine-”
“Define fine,” he scoffed. It was clear the two of you wouldn’t get anywhere like this, so you did the only thing you could think to do: you reached out and took both his hands in yours.
Jungkook looked up then through the curtain of tresses still falling into his eyes. He sighed.
“Sorry, baby, I know I shouldn’t be acting like this. It’s just- with everything we’ve been through with him I can’t help but worry about stuff like this.”
You understood completely because you were in the same boat.
Both of you had recently been experiencing less than pleasant encounters with your ex-fiancé, Kun, who for some reason decided he had a vendetta against the two of you. A vendetta that only got worse when you both made it clear you wanted nothing to do with him ever again.
The past week had been pretty quiet, but neither of you could shake the awful feeling that Kun wasn’t gone for good. And tonight’s fiasco did nothing to help that.
“Well it’s over now and I’m ok and I didn’t get hurt so let’s try not to focus on it, yeah?” You squeezed his hands for emphasis and he sighed. The last thing you wanted was for Jungkook to be worried the rest of his shift, and he still had a few hours left.
“Yeah, I’ll try. I’m just so glad Hoseok was around...are you still wanting to talk to Yoongi?”
You nodded, happy to see Jungkook had relaxed some more from when he first sat across from you.
“I’ll take you to his office, then.” Jungkook got up, pulling you with him since his hands were still in yours. When you both were standing, he wrapped his arms around your waist to pull you into a hug.
He looked down at you before placing a soft kiss on your forehead. “Also I hate to ask but do you mind staying until I get done with my shift? I’m not too keen on the idea of you going home alone now with everything-“
You giggled and caressed his cheek. “Of course, Koo. I’ll come sit at the bar when I get done talking to Yoongi.”
Jungkook brushed his nose against yours. “Thank you.”
“Anything for you,” you responded before you reached up to place a gentle kiss on his lips. His hold around you tightened, and he deepened the kiss for only a moment before pulling back.
“Fuck, I forgot I’m at work, I need to be careful when you’re around.” He carded a hand through his hair before shaking his head to let it fall back into place.
You laughed at his flustered nature, feeling a bit flustered yourself at the fact that even now you still had such an effect on each other. “Well we are back here in a dark corner where not many people are around,” you teased.
Jungkook smirked before tickling your sides, making you laugh louder as you squirmed to get away.
“Don’t tempt me. I’d rather not get fired for public indecency if I can help it.”
“Fine, fine, I guess just take me to see Yoongi then,” you pretended to pout and were rewarded with a chuckle. He led you to the back now where Yoongi’s office was at, his hand wrapped around yours while he scanned the bar the whole way there.
When the two of you reached the familiar door, Jungkook gave your hand one last squeeze and kissed your cheek.
“I’ve gotta get back to the bar, just come chill up there when you’re done, yeah?” His eyebrows were slightly furrowed like he was still worried, but your gentle smile helped smooth them out.
“Of course. I’ll see you soon.”
You knocked on the door and after hearing Yoongi’s muffled greeting you opened it to walk through, not sparing another glance at Jungkook.
“Y/N! I was wondering when you might be stopping by.” Yoongi smiled brightly at you, always making you feel welcome no matter the circumstance. You took a seat in your usual spot across from his desk where he was currently reclining in his chair.
“Hey, Yoon. How are things?” It’d been a little while since the two of you had properly caught up since things had been so chaotic lately.
Yoongi shrugged. “Can’t complain. Business is good and we’ve been pulling in more regulars. I’d like to say it’s thanks to Jungkook but don’t tell him I told you that. Kid has a big enough head as it is.”
You couldn’t help the proud grin that stretched across your face. Jungkook had been working hard to help turn the bar into a more welcoming environment and increased his work hours to also assist with some building upgrades Yoongi had been wanting to install for years. Their business had increased exponentially as a result, so you knew Yoongi meant it when he said he had Jungkook to thank.
“I’ll be sure to keep it our little secret,” you brought your hand up to mimic a ‘shh’ expression and Yoongi chuckled.
“Perfect.” He leaned forward then, an elbow resting on his desk and his head supported by his palm. “So tell me: how’s married life?”
“It’s everything I could ever want and more. I can’t say much has changed except the whole ‘legally being bound together’ thing, since we still act the same. It’s just…nice. Really, really nice.” Your gaze drifted down to your wedding ring, and as it was with every other time you saw it, you could feel something akin to butterflies fluttering inside your stomach.
Yoongi gave you his trademark lopsided grin. “Glad to hear it. You know, I was always rooting for you two from the start.”
You feigned annoyance, playfully rolling your eyes. “I know, I know, you only tell me every chance you get.” Yoongi never took a liking to your ex-fiancé and had always favored Jungkook, this much you knew. Even before Kun turned into the person he was now, Yoongi never cared for him. And he made sure it was known.
“Have you thought about when you’re going to pop the question?” You decided to switch gears and put him on the spot, giggling at the way he seemed flustered.
“Well I uh, I’ve thought about it I just- it’s hard to figure out the right time, you know? And is she even ready for that, I can’t tell-”
“Min Yoongi, you stop that right now. She is so in love with you that I bet she’s ready for you to ask any day now, just so she can say yes like she’s been wanting to for so long now.” You had spent enough time around Yoongi and his long-term partner to know that the two were head-over-heels for each other, nearly rivaling you and Jungkook in how easy it was to tell.
Yoongi grinned. “You think so, huh?”
“No doubt in my mind. In fact-” you were cut off by the feeling of your phone vibrating in your pocket. You hastily took it out, not sure who could be calling at this hour.
It dawned on you then that you had been expecting a new client to call, and the number on your screen was one you didn’t recognize so you figured it could be them. Your boss had heavily expressed the importance of this client and their business venture they were offering, so without giving it another thought you hopped out of your chair.
“Sorry Yoon, I need to take this real quick. Do you mind if I step out the back door? It shouldn’t take too long.” You were already heading to leave his office, trying to catch the call before it stopped ringing, barely missing his soft “Go ahead.”
You bolted through the back door of the establishment, out into the dimly lit parking lot. As soon as you heard the door shut, you swiftly answered the call.
“Hello, this is Y/N speaking, may I ask who’s calling?” You gave your usual greeting for work related or other conversations when you didn’t recognize the number. The silence that you were met with on the other end made a chill run down your spine.
You froze altogether when the other voice spoke.
“Hasn’t anyone ever told you not to answer calls from numbers you don’t know?”
You felt your lower lip tremble. “K-Kun?”
A dark chuckle from the other end of the line. “Missed me, sweetheart?”
‘Just hang up,’ your brain was screaming at you, but you were holding your phone in an iron-tight grip, knuckles taut.
“Leave me alone and never contact me again,” you were finally able to respond, moving your arm to bring your phone down to hang up.
Your phone hit the ground before you got the chance.
Someone had come up behind you and pulled both arms behind your back, a hand coming around to muffle the scream you let out.
“Shhh,” someone whispered beside your ear. “You don’t want to make this harder for yourself, hm?”
That voice, why did you recognize that voice?
The person started dragging you off into one of the darker corners of the parking lot, ignoring your futile attempts to kick and writhe out of their grasp. You continued screaming into their palm but to no avail.
When you reached where they wanted you to be, they let you go and pushed you down onto the ground, causing your back to hit the wall and briefly knock the breath out of you. Before you could pick yourself back up, 2 other shadowy figures blocked your path. There was just enough light for you to finally make out the faces of the 3 people standing over you.
They were the same ones from earlier in the bar, the ones who had harassed you and yanked you down into their booth.
“What do you want,” you sobbed out into the night air. You were too terrified to try screaming again, afraid of what they might do. Especially now that you were across the lot, away from your phone and any chance of contacting someone else. Not to mention the fact that it was loud inside the bar, so screaming wouldn’t do you many favors anyway.
And if someone walked by, nothing would look out of the ordinary since it was just dark enough where you were to obscure the vision of anyone looking from the outside.
Before any of them could answer you, there was another sound you heard faintly in the distance: footsteps.
“Hel-,” you started to cry out, but as if they knew what you were planning, one of the men dropped down and covered your mouth again, now letting you see who was approaching behind them. Your eyes widened in terror as you took in the newcomer’s sinister grin.
You watched as Kun nodded to the other 2 men and they moved aside, while the third one still keeping your mouth covered moved slightly out of the way. Kun knelt down and moved his hand, replacing it with his own before you could scream again.
“Well well, fancy seeing you here.” Kun reached out and caressed your check with the back of his other hand, making you let out a strangled whimper as you tried to move back and away from him. He shook his head at your action and grabbed onto one of your arms now instead, pulling you and himself up in a swift motion.
His grip around your arm was painful, making you wince. Kun either didn’t notice or didn’t care. One look into his eyes was enough to see that the man you’d spent many years of your life with was completely gone with no trace left whatsoever. You didn’t know this person standing in front of you now.
And you didn’t ever want to.
“Now, I’m gonna move my hand, and you’re not gonna scream. Got it? Because if you do,” he moved forward to where his face was inches away from yours now. “I promise this will be so much worse for you. And you know I always keep my promises, don’t you?”
Kun was laughing before you could react at all, knowing good and well he’d broken several promises during your time together. He must have taken your silence as compliance because you could feel his hand relaxing around your face.
“Good girl,” the words made you shudder repulsively, wanting nothing more than for this to be just a terrible figment of your imagination and for you to be back inside at the bar waiting on Jungkook.
Jungkook. The thought of him caused a lump to form in your throat. You had no idea what Kun had planned for you, and that caused your heart to constrict as the vision of Jungkook smiling lovingly at you flashed through your mind.
You squeezed your eyes shut and felt a tear roll down your cheek. You opened them again once you felt Kun’s hand disappear.
“Ah, so you can take direction well. I guess Jungkook’s trained you somewhat since you’re his bitch now-”
“What do you want,” you asked through gritted teeth. The last thing you wanted to hear come from this man’s mouth was the name of your beloved. You didn’t want him brought up at all, the less this was focused on Jungkook the better.
But, since it was Kun, that obviously didn’t happen.
Kun laughed again, a loud, ugly sound. “What do I want? The same thing I’ve always wanted. Isn’t it obvious?”
The 3 men were crowded around both of you now, and it dawned on you then that they were blocking any means of escape for you. That didn’t bode well for you and you knew it, but you held your ground. You didn’t want to give Kun any more of the upper hand than he already had.
Kun finally dropped his other hand from your arm in favor of now caging you in against the wall. You were trapped even more now, but you just stared back at him, trying your best to look unfazed. Kun dipped his head down and you held your breath.
“What I want,” you could feel him barely hovering over your lips and the feeling made your skin crawl, “is for Jungkook to pay.”
“Pay for what,” you couldn’t help your annoyed tone. Kun’s obsession with Jungkook and ‘coming out on top’ – whatever that even meant, you weren’t entirely sure – had gotten old and you were beyond sick of it. “He owes you nothing, we owe you nothing.”
Kun hummed and shook his head, his nose almost brushing against yours, but you turned your head and let it graze against your cheek.
”I don’t think you get to decide that, not in the position you’re in, anyway. You see, I’m tired of seeing Jungkook get literally everything handed to him without trying-”
“Jungkook has worked hard for everything he has, something you wouldn’t know about,” you spat back. Kun was right, you were certainly in no position to be talking back right now, but you wouldn’t stand idly by while he slandered Jungkook just because he felt like it. “You’ve always been jealous of him-”
“Shut up, shut up!” Kun snarled, all but yelling in your face before he grabbed you by the jaw. You grimaced from the pain of it, a sound something like a scream starting but dying in your throat.
“You fucking infuriate me sometimes, you know that? I can’t believe I wasted so many years with you.” His grip around your jaw tightened as he finished talking, making it almost too hard for you to respond.
“Likewise,” you managed to get out, not being able to help the sob you let out when he squeezed more.
“Doesn’t matter.” Kun’s face stretched into that evil, Cheshire-like grin and for the first time that night you felt genuinely horrified about what his true intentions might be. “I’m not concerned with you or how you feel.”
Kun finally let go of your jaw and you let out the breath you didn’t realize you had been holding in. He grabbed one of your wrists and tugged you closer, knocking you off balance and unfortunately causing you to brace yourself against his chest.
He hugged you to him and whispered in your ear: “What I do care about is seeing Jungkook’s reaction when his precious wife is suddenly nowhere to be found.”
That kicked you into fight or flight mode, eyes widening and mouth opening to scream as you flailed your hands around. Your flailing did little to help you because Kun was already dragging you alongside him away from the wall, still holding you close.
“Let me go, you psycho!” you screamed, only causing him to turn you around and put a hand over your mouth again while his other arm held you firm against his torso.
“One of you bring the car around,” Kun ordered, and you saw one of the men dashing away. As you were pulled further away from the bar, your vision was clouded with a film of tears and your muffled sobs were hidden behind Kun’s hand. You were no match for his strength, and he proved it because he was literally dragging you across the concrete despite you being so uncooperative. Gentle raindrops had just started falling from the sky, further impairing your vision.
It was then that you heard a pained grunt followed by a thud coming from a little further away, in the direction the other man had ran off to. You tried to focus your eyes to see what was happening when the next sound that graced your ears was fast footsteps as they pounded against the pavement.
“Get your fucking hands off of her!”
A familiar voice made you cry out with joy and fight harder against Kun.
“Yoongi,” you cried out, still muffled but enough to draw his attention to your face now. He was running toward Kun fast, and when he saw the position you were in, he sped up, determined to free you by any means necessary.
You briefly worried about the other men behind him, until you saw that another was already knocked down and someone else – you thought it might be Jimin – was currently fighting with the third man. While your attention was on them, you didn’t register Kun tossing you aside until it was too late.
You slipped on the now wet pavement and fell down, barely able to brace yourself for the impact in time. Your earlier vision of Jungkook smiling was the last thing to flash through your mind before your head hit the ground.
⊱──────── ✬ ✬ ✬ ────────⊰
Yoongi glanced at his watch for the second time. It’d been about 10 minutes since you stepped outside to take your phone call, and he figured it had to have been important if you were still outside.
As he was wondering whether or not to call you himself to see if everything was alright, Jimin stuck his head inside the office, peeking around the door. “Hey boss, is Y/N around?”
Yoongi sat up straight. “Yeah, she stepped outside to take a call but it’s been a few minutes. Why?”
Jimin’s face blanched. “She went alone?”
“Yeah... Jimin’s what’s going on?”
Jimin took a deep breath. “It’s probably nothing, but earlier there were some guys that straight up harassed her. They were thrown out but-“
Yoongi held a hand up. “Wait. Pause. Someone harassed her? Why is this the first I’m hearing about it?”
Jimin had stepped fully into the room now, rubbing at the back of his neck as he looked at the ground. “Well it wasn’t that long ago, so maybe nobody had the chance yet.”
Yoongi’s brows furrowed. “Does Jungkook know?”
Jimin nodded. “Yeah, he’s the one who asked me to come check on her without being too obvious about it. I think the whole thing has him spooked.”
Yoongi didn’t like the feeling that was slowly creeping up on him. He dialed your number and put the receiver to his ear, hoping to hear a busy signal on the other end.
When he was met with a series of rings, his heart started beating faster. He was up and out of his chair fully by the time he heard your voicemail greeting.
“Fuck,” he mumbled out loud to no one in particular. He was jogging over to the back door, a confused Jimin following close behind.
“Yoongi, what-”
“Not now, Jimin.” He picked up his pace, feeling his chest tighten as he approached the door. He was hoping that when he opened it you would be on the other side, because maybe you just lost track of time and your phone was on silent.
Wishful thinking helps in times of peril, right?
Yoongi pushed the door open quickly, letting it bang against the side of the bar. You were nowhere in sight, his eyes frantically searching through the lot for a trace of you.
What he was met with, though, was instead the sight of 3 - maybe 4? - dark figures across the lot, huddled in a suspicious way. His heart dropped to his stomach.
He started running, not knowing what would meet him when he did, but not caring either. As he approached, one of the figures tried to block him. He took them down easily with a single punch, making them groan in pain as their body connected with the ground. Yoongi never stopped running for even a moment.
His heart wrenched when his vision finally adjusted enough to the darkness outside and he could see you and exactly who was holding you.
“Get your fucking hands off of her!” He shouted as he continued running, getting ready to barrel into Kun at any moment.
Hearing your faint cry of his name only made him go faster when his eyes landed on your horrified face.
It was raining now but Yoongi wouldn’t let that stop him from saving you. What he didn’t anticipate was for Kun to throw you in the opposite direction, making him conflicted about who to go after now. He settled for pursuing Kun still, finally reaching him and grabbing him by the shirt.
“What the actual fuck is your problem,” Yoongi yelled in Kun’s face. Kun brought his hands up to try and tear Yoongi’s away, but they wouldn’t budge.
Kun stopped trying to fight back and smiled at Yoongi, making a fresh wave of disgust cascade over him. When Kun spoke, his voice had a calm edge to it. “I’ll just keep coming back, no matter how many times you and those idiots in there,” he jerked his head in the direction of the bar, “try to keep me away.”
Yoongi quickly spun Kun around and forced him to the ground, keeping his hands behind his back and not giving him a way to escape. “Jimin, call the cops,” he called over his shoulder before leaning closer to Kun’s face. “We may not be able to keep you away, but they certainly can with all the dirt we have on you.”
Kun chuckled slightly before grimacing when Yoongi twisted his arm further. “You know,” he huffed out, “Y/N was pretty off balance when I threw her earlier.”
Yoongi stilled. He realized that Kun was trying to distract him by making him worry about you, and unfortunately for Yoongi it was working. Especially when his eyes fell on your unmoving figure several feet away, lying on your side.
“Shit,” he jumped up and ran over to you, completely abandoning Kun, beyond caring at that point. He knelt down and turned you over. He swallowed when he saw the way your arm landed limply on the ground beside him. He embraced your upper body within his arms, shaking you a little.
“Y/N, hey, wake up,” he begged. He could feel that you were still breathing, but it was very evident your fall had knocked you out. And Yoongi knew there was no telling what happened before he even got to you, so he had no clue how injured you might actually be.
He heard footsteps approaching from behind him, splashing against the puddles that were starting to form in the parking lot. He didn’t have to look up to know it was Jimin, since the other man was calling out his name before he got there.
“Yoongi, I called them, they said – wait where did he go?” Jimin was standing over Yoongi now, looking from one area of the parking lot to the other, but Kun was nowhere in sight. “Did you let him leave?”
Yoongi’s silence prompted Jimin to finally look down and his mouth dropped open as he himself dropped to kneel next to Yoongi.
“Holy shit, what happened,” Jimin reached out to gingerly touch your arm, frown deepening when he got no response from you.
“She probably hit her head when that bastard threw her earlier. She’s just knocked out, I think,” Yoongi’s voice was lined with unbridled anger. “Go see if you can find Jin since he’s the closest thing we have to a medic right now. And get Kook.”
Jimin nodded and without another word took off toward the bar. Yoongi couldn’t fathom how Jungkook would react but he knew it wouldn’t be good. As he waited, he held you closer, trying to shield you from the rain.
⊱──────── ✬ ✬ ✬ ────────⊰
Jungkook’s fingers were drumming against the bar absentmindedly as he listened to one of his regular patrons drone on about their week as they usually did on nights like tonight. He was genuinely trying to focus on what they were saying, truly he was, but his mind had been so muddled ever since the incident earlier that he found it hard to think about anything else.
Which is exactly why he had asked Jimin to casually check in on you and Yoongi.
It’d been a few minutes and Jimin still wasn’t back; Jungkook hoped that they were all 3 chatting and Jimin was just taking his time. He did want him to be inconspicuous about it, after all.
His patron finally excused themselves to go to the restroom, and Jungkook offered them a soft smile. For a second, he allowed himself to take a deep breath and try to push any lingering negative thoughts out of his mind so he could make it through the rest of his shift.
Jungkook should’ve known better than to hope for a moment’s peace.
He heard Jimin before he saw him, colliding with the other end of the bar. Jungkook cautiously started walking over to him, trying to ignore the heavy feeling that settled over his body like a suffocating blanket.
“Kook,” Jimin panted, “we need you. Now.”
The expression on Jimin’s face and the urgency of his voice made Jungkook’s blood run cold. He wasted no time in leaving the bar as he followed Jimin, nearly running him over when Jimin stopped once they were outside. As his sight adjusted to the drizzling rain, he saw something that made him run as fast as he could before eventually falling to his knees, panic seizing his heart.
“No. No no no no no,” Jungkook was chanting over and over as he stared at you, huddled against Yoongi as he held you close. Your eyes were closed and you weren’t moving.
Jungkook’s hands were shaking, and he could feel his lips quivering. Yoongi stared at Jungkook somberly before gentle passing you over to him.
He immediately drew you to him, burying your face in his chest while he cradled the back of your head with his palm.
The rain started pouring down harder now and he knew it was pelting against his back, cold and wet enough to chill him to the bone. But Jungkook felt nothing. There was nothing but numbness as he continued to rock you gently in his arms and placed a kiss on the top of your head.
“Hey angel, I’m here,” his voice was unsteady. “It’s me, baby, I’ve got you. You’re gonna be ok,” his arm that was wrapped around your back tightened its hold on you and he placed his head in the crook of your neck. You still didn’t rouse, no matter what he tried, and his shoulders started to shake.
“Kook-” Yoongi had to talk loud to be heard over the sudden downpour. “We need to get her inside.” He tried reaching out to touch Jungkook’s arm but Jungkook flinched away, embracing you even tighter now as if he was trying to protect you from anything and everything.
He just wanted to protect you. And the fact that he had failed was currently eating him alive with regret.
Yoongi sighed but tried again. “Jungkook,” he said it softer this time but still loud enough, “let’s take her inside. You don’t want her to get sick.”
At the mention of your well-being potentially suffering further damage, Jungkook started to somewhat come back to his senses. He held you tight and stood up with a little help from Yoongi, making sure to keep you as close to his chest as possible so you wouldn’t get soaked and because right now, he needed you near.
When the 3 of you were inside, Yoongi ushered you all into his office since there was a small couch in there were you could lie down. Jungkook placed you as gently as possible on the couch, feeling his heart break piece by piece every second you remained unmoving. The only thing that could offer him solace was the faint rise and fall of your chest as you breathed.
He dropped to sit on the floor beside the couch, holding one of your hands in his while he used his other one to brush some of your wet hair out of your face. He leaned his forehead against the arm of the couch and inhaled shakily.
Yoongi was leaning against his desk with his arms crossed, looking at the two of you. Jungkook appreciated Yoongi for giving him time to try and calm down before talking again.
“What happened,” Jungkook managed to croak after a minute or so had passed.
Yoongi took a deep breath. “Kun was here.”
Jungkook whipped his head around fast, his hair splaying water droplets on the couch. His eyes were glazed over with unshed tears, and Yoongi had never seen him look so angry.
He’d never seen Jungkook look so hurt.
“Kun did this to her,” Jungkook asked, tone low and dark, but it came out more as a statement because he already knew. He could tell by the angered inflection in Yoongi’s voice when he mentioned Kun.
Yoongi nodded. “Unfortunately. When I first made it outside, he was holding onto her, dragging her away-”
“Dragging her where,” his hand that was holding yours involuntarily squeezed harder.
Yoongi shrugged, shaking his head. “I don’t know, it looked like he was trying to take her to a car…”
Jungkook didn’t miss the way he trailed off. He waited for Yoongi to collect his thoughts.
 “Jungkook, I- I think he may have been trying to abduct her.”
Jungkook felt like the room had suddenly tilted. The idea of that – God, the idea of anything remotely close to that – made him feel violently ill.
He looked at your face then, noticing how it wasn’t scrunched up in pain; you actually looked quite peaceful despite the circumstances, almost like you were simply in a deep slumber. He tried hard to swallow around the ever-growing lump that was still forming in his throat when he brushed his fingertips along the length of your arm.
You were here, physically here. He could see you and he could touch you. Yoongi had saved you in time before you had been whisked away to who knows where. The fact that Kun had even dared to try to take you away… the possibility of you being gone and Jungkook not knowing where you had been taken to or if he’d ever see you again-
It made Jungkook see red.
This isn’t the life he wanted for you. He never wanted you to have to look over your shoulder in fear at the idea of someone following you, like you’d been doing the last several weeks. He never ever wanted you to get hurt, especially in such a way as this.
He could feel anger flowing through his veins, seeping into his bones and consuming him, with the only thing able to ground him right now being the feeling of your soft hand enveloped by his own.
Yoongi was saying more but Jungkook couldn’t make it out over his own voice screaming at him inside his head. His mind was waging a war with itself, questioning so many things-
Was he really the best person for you?
Was there someone out there who could protect you, who could keep you safe in ways he couldn’t?
Would loving you be enough if he could never fully promise you peace?
What if-
“Jungkook,” Yoongi’s stern voice cut through the thick fog of his mind and Jungkook shook his head to try clear it completely. He focused his attention on his friend that was now staring at him, sporting a frown on his face full of concern.
“Did you hear anything I just said?”
Jungkook gulped. “Honestly? No.”
Yoongi’s frown intensified. “Kook-”
“Don’t, just- please repeat it. Please.”
Yoongi sighed, closing his eyes for a moment before he continued. “I was saying that Kun threw her to the ground and that’s how she hit her head.”
Jungkook’s unoccupied hand balled into a fist and he clenched his jaw. Yoongi could see him tense up but continued speaking.
“I asked Jimin to fetch Jin seeing as he’s had more medical training than any of us and I figured it’d be better than waiting on an ambulance.”
He had barely gotten the last word out before there was hurried knocking on the door. Yoongi walked over to the door quickly to open it, and Jin rushed in without a moment’s hesitation.
“Sorry it took so long, I needed to get supplies.” He made his way to the couch, crouching down in front of it next to Jungkook. He placed the bag he was carrying down onto the ground beside him as he started sifting through it to find other things he needed. Jungkook watched Jin without really seeing him, flinching a little when he felt a hand on his shoulder.
“Kook,” Yoongi said softly as Jungkook looked up at him. “We need to let Jin look at her. C’mon,” he patted his shoulder before walking away, and Jungkook knew Yoongi expected him to follow him.
Jungkook also knew Yoongi was right, and he needed to let Jin get to work. He hated the thought of leaving you, but he knew he wasn’t going far. In fact, he wasn��t even going to leave the room, and if he was encouraged to, well-
There wasn’t anything anyone could do to make him leave that room short of physically removing him themselves. And with how wound up Jungkook was about this entire situation, that wouldn’t be an easy feat by any means.
Thankfully, Yoongi didn’t ask him to leave, opting instead to offer him his office chair. Jungkook graciously accepted the offer and sat down, briefly observing how Jin carefully examined you from across the room before he placed his head in his hands.
⊱──────── ✬ ✬ ✬ ────────⊰
Some time passed before Jungkook felt like he could properly breathe again. And he was only feeling like that now because you had finally started to stir.
As soon as the faintest noise was heard from you, Jungkook was out of his seat and in front of the couch again.
You groaned as you rubbed your eyes, trying to adjust to the light by blinking a few times. After doing this, you tilted your head to the side and your eyes landed on Jungkook. He inhaled sharply, feeling like he might break apart when you gave him the sweetest smile.
“Koo,” you breathed out softly as your hand reached up to caress his cheek. He vaguely heard Jin telling Yoongi something about you still having decent control over your motor skills being a good sign, but right now all his focus was on you specifically.
Well, he was also focusing on not having a breakdown, but you were most important.
His hand came up to cover yours that was still on his face and for the first time in what felt like ages, his lips curved upward into a smile.
“Hey, angel,” he responded. “How are you feeling?”
 Your eyebrows furrowed. “Well, my head hurts but otherwise I’m fine? A little sore, though-”
“That’s probably from your fall earlier,” Jin interrupted, pulling your attention back to him. You looked at him, bewildered.
“I fell? When did I fall?”
Yoongi and Jungkook shared a look then, and Jungkook would be lying if he said you not remembering what happened didn’t worry him.
It worried him a lot, actually.
Jin hummed. “We can talk about it later. I need to examine you now though, ok? Make sure you don’t have any signs of a concussion or something else.”
The scared look on your face made Jungkook’s chest tighten.
“O-ok, yeah, sure. Do whatever you need to,” you said as you tried to sit up straight, Jungkook and Jin both helping to steady you as you did.
It didn’t take long for Jin to conduct his examination. While he was checking you over, Yoongi relayed the events from earlier to you and Jungkook observed as the look in your eyes switched from one of confusion to one of horror the more Yoongi went on.
“I-I remember now. Right before you came out there, Kun told me-” you trailed off, speaking to Yoongi but looking over at Jungkook now. His heart started beating painfully when you paused.
“What did he tell you, baby?”
You inhaled unevenly, the sight tearing Jungkook up even more on the inside. “He told me that he wanted to see your reaction when I was nowhere to be found.”
This time, he swore his heart stopped.
So Kun had not only planned to take you away, but he wanted to make sure you couldn’t be found?
Jungkook made a promise to himself then and there that if he ever saw Kun again, he’d-
“Koo?”
Your pleading tone made Jungkook’s eyes snap back up to your face. You were trying to give him a small smile, but he could still see the fear lying behind your eyes.
“It’s going to be ok,” you attempted to reassure him. “Don’t worry.”
Jungkook had no idea how you could sit here an expect him not to worry but he didn’t want to fight you on it. You’d both had enough excitement for one night so all he did was nod and hope that would suffice for now.
His mind was starting to race again with the same kind of thoughts he had earlier, plaguing him with questions he didn’t know the answers to.
Frankly, he didn’t even know if he wanted the answers either.
Jin stood up from where he was seated on the floor, straightening himself up and stretching his long limbs. “She’s going to be fine. Just keep an eye on her for the next few days, but I don’t see anything to be alarmed about. If anything changes, you can call me but also if you’re more comfortable going to a hospital, that’s fine too. I won’t be offended.”
Jungkook smiled at his eldest friend. “Thank you, Jin. Seriously, thank you.”
Jin nodded, offering a warm smile to you before exiting the room.
Yoongi walked over to the couch and ruffled your hair. Jungkook watched the exchange with fondness, seeing two of the people he cared about most in the world also caring for each other.
“I’m so glad you’re ok,” Yoongi said, sounding utterly tired. You thanked him again for what he had done, and Jungkook left the two of you alone momentarily so he could check on Jimin and Hoseok at the bar. They entertained him for all of maybe 5 seconds before shooing him away, assuring him that they could handle things and that he should just take you home and be with you right now.
Jungkook thought nothing sounded better.
When he made it back to Yoongi’s office, he saw that you were now sitting on the armrest of the couch. Yoongi must have helped you get up from the couch, seeing as he was standing beside you, and Jungkook strode over to take his place now with an arm around your waist. Yoongi didn’t say anything about him leaving other than to wish you both a goodnight and that he would talk to Jungkook later.
Jungkook helped you walk to the car, not letting you go for even a fraction of a second, despite your teasing him about being able to walk on your own. Be that as it may, he still wouldn’t let go, because the truth of the matter was he was just too scared to.
It wasn’t until you were both in the car riding home that Jungkook let those negative thoughts devour him once more.
And this time, they were almost impossible to shake away.
⊱──────── ✬ ✬ ✬ ────────⊰
When both of you finally arrived home, Jungkook opened the door and surveyed the room before letting you go inside. You knew his paranoia was at an all-time high right now and frankly you couldn’t blame him; you were still really unsettled, too.
But you were more of the mindset that it’s in the past now and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. You never liked to dwell too long on things and Jungkook was becoming better about that as well.
You weren’t sure if it’d be that easy this time, though.
He’d barely said a word to you the whole ride home, and even now as you were both standing by the front door while he locked it, he was still eerily quiet. Once it was sufficiently locked enough by Jungkook’s standards, he gave you one last look before he started walking down the hallway. You frowned and followed him.
“Koo?”
No response.
“Baby? Talk to me.” It looked like he was trying to go to the kitchen, but it was still dark in the house since he’d barely turned on any of the lights, so you weren’t sure. Still no answer.
“Jungkook.” You called out sternly this time and just barely spotted him as he disappeared into the kitchen. When he heard you walk in, he finally spoke.
“You should eat something, what do you want?”
His voice broke your heart.
“I’m not hungry-”
“You can go lay down, Jin said you didn’t have a concussion so it should be fine. I can bring some food up for you.” He was leaning against the counter in front of the sink, his back turned to you and his head hanging somewhat.
He sounded not at all like himself, and it scared you. Not in the way that you were scared of him, but you were scared because you didn’t know what to do.
Talking was obviously getting you nowhere, so you instead walked up to him and wrapped your arms around him from behind, placing your cheek against his back. He flinched.
“Baby, please,” his voice sounded like it was breaking so you just held him tighter, hoping he could feel your love from the way you embraced him as if you never wanted to let him go.
“Koo, I need you to talk to me. I need to know what’s wrong-”
“What’s wrong is me,” he gritted out, tone louder than before and it made you jump. He then released himself from your arms and tried to walk away.
“Jungkook, wait,” you scrambled to go after him, catching him before he could disappear into another room, this time turning him around to face you. He was leaning against the wall and didn’t try to move past you anymore, but he avoided your gaze.
“Koo, look at me,” you stressed, ducking down to peek up at him. He finally raised his head so you could look into his eyes at a normal level. You noticed the tears in the corner of his eyes, and it nearly made you start crying yourself.
Jungkook never hid his vulnerability from you, he never hid anything from you. But even so, it was still a rare sight to see him cry.
“Why do you want to be around me right now,” he questioned, voice wavering and you recognized the sound. He was trying to hold himself back from crying.
“Koo, what do you mean, why wouldn’t I want to be around you? I love you-”
“I couldn’t protect you,” his voice rose in pitch, not to talk over you but because he was just so upset. “I couldn’t save you, I wasn’t around to help you- God, baby, you got fucking attacked and I wasn’t there.”
He was trembling and you tried to steady him by placing your hands on his shoulders. Tears were flowing freely down his cheeks now, and they were bound to start pooling in your own eyes any second.
“None of that is your fault,” you emphasized your words by squeezing his shoulders. “Ok? No one could have predicted what that psycho was gonna do, not you, not me, not Yoongi, nobody.”
“For fuck’s sake, he almost kidnapped you-”
“But he didn’t and I’m here.” You brushed his cheek to wipe some of the tears away and he choked back a sob. “I’m here, with you, and that’s what matters.”
“I could have lost you,” he said it just above a whisper as you moved to brush the tears away from his other cheek.
You blinked back your own tears. “You didn’t lose me.”
“But I could have. We have no idea what the fuck he’s capable of and just- every time I think about what might have happened if no one got to you in time, I start to lose my mind.”
You wrapped your arms around his neck and reached up on your tip-toes to place a gentle kiss on his lips, heart lurching when he actually kissed you back and his hands found purchase on your waist as they usually did.
“You didn’t lose me. You have me. All of me. I’m right here,” you kissed him once more. “And I’m not going anywhere.”
Jungkook let out a sob as he pulled you closer, nearly crushing you with his embrace. You ran your hand through his hair to try and soothe him when he leaned his forehead on your shoulder.
“I was so fucking scared,” he said against your skin. “So terrified. I love you so much,” a tender kiss was placed on the side of your neck now, and you could feel his lips still trembling.
“I love you,” your response prompted another small sob from him, “I love you more than anyone or anything else in this world and I’ll show you that everyday for the rest of my life, as long as you let me.”
“Baby-” Jungkook’s voice cracked with so much raw emotion and you couldn’t help yourself anymore. You were determined to show him your conviction behind your statement, so with your hand still buried in his hair, you pulled him down to your level once more as you crashed your lips together.
You’d never felt anything quite like the emotions that coursed through you every single time you kissed Jungkook. It didn’t matter if it was the cute good morning kisses upon waking up, the silly, laughter-filled ones that happened in the midst of playing around, or the intense ones bursting with passion that always led to something more. Each one was different and better than the last, and it was like a language between you both filled with unspoken words that demonstrated exactly what you felt.
This was one of the many ways the two of your expressed your devotion to one another, through an action as simple as kissing yet the feelings it always evoked inside of you were anything but. And even during times like tonight when you’d both endured something extremely emotional, you could still find comfort in each other through these gestures.
When you finally broke apart, you were both panting breathlessly, and Jungkook rested his forehead against yours.
“Sorry, baby,” Jungkook breathed, voice somewhat raspy. His fingers had started gripping your waist harder during the exchange, but you felt them start to loosen.
That was most definitely something you didn’t want, so you placed your hands on the sides of his face and looked him in the eyes.
“Koo,” you spoke softly, cautiously, as if you were testing the waters. “Can I give you all of me?”
His eyes sparkled with the realization of what you were implying, and for a moment you wondered if he would reject you. And if he did, that would be completely fine with you because his comfort mattered most of all to you right now, as it always did. Tonight had been a lot to deal with and you weren���t sure what mindset he would be in about this sort of thing-
That thought remained unfinished in your mind as Jungkook captured your lips again and all other rational thought went out the window. All you could focus on now was how Jungkook’s body felt melded up against yours, how his mouth was exploring yours like he’d done so many times before, how his fingers dug into your skin like he was afraid to let you go.
You jumped up and Jungkook wrapped your legs around his waist, never breaking the kiss while he turned you around so that your back was against the wall. You heard a low groan come from him as you intensified the kiss before he pulled away.
“Angel, are you sure about this?” He was holding you up with help from the wall, hands placed on your thighs just underneath your ass. Your hand was playing with the hair at the nape of his neck since you knew how much he loved that. “The last thing I want to do is hurt you-”
“Koo, I’m fine. I feel fine and I’m not in pain. I promise. I want this. I want you,” you gave him another searing kiss that you felt yourself melting into. “But only if you want it too.”
Jungkook’s next kiss knocked the breath out of you and he swallowed the surprised whimper you let out. “Of course, baby. I always want you.”
His words never failed to make you feel warm all over, with love and adoration as well as arousal. Right now, you were feeling all of these things as he situated your legs around his waist in a more comfortable position.
“Do you want to do this here,” he panted as his eyes met yours again. You could tell he was getting worked up just having you like this here against the wall, so you wasted no time answering him.
“Yes Koo, please,” you urged him to continue. “Wanna feel you close. Don’t wanna wait.”
“Fuck, I mean, I could take us upstairs-” his words ended with a grunt as you drew him closer by wrapping your legs tighter around him, making him grind against you. His head dipped down to rest against your shoulder as he let out shallow breaths, his fingers threatening to make indentations in your skin.
In a somewhat frenzied manner, Jungkook put you back down on your feet so the both of you could remove your clothes, too impatient to take everything off and only getting rid of what was necessary. When both of your lower halves were bare, he secured you around his waist once more, his length rapidly hardening against your now naked thigh.
You reached in between the two of you to wrap your hand around him, and the feeling was enough to have him inhaling sharply before he kissed you with a newfound urgency. You could tell by the way he was moaning against your mouth that your teasing caresses were working and within no time he was ready. You let out a stuttered moan when Jungkook’s long fingers disappeared inside of you so he could make sure you were stretched enough.
When he deemed you prepped enough – and when you started rocking against his fingers with impatient whimpers – he withdrew so he could line himself up with you. Your already soaked folds were threatening to pull him in, and it was almost too much for him to handle in his heightened emotional state.
He pushed in slowly, inch by inch, as he always did. The stretch made you lean your head back against the wall, his soft curses only spurring you on even more. On other nights you might would try to coax him to be a little rougher because you knew you could take it, but tonight you weren’t in a rush for anything, and neither was he. Tonight was about you two being together as one, relishing the way you shared this connection with each other and conveying it through this intimate act.
Both of you sighed in pleasure when Jungkook bottomed out, finally experiencing that complete closeness the two of you craved more than anything else right now. His hands gripped your ass firmly to start moving you up and down his length in slow, steady strokes. He didn’t want to take things fast or go hard tonight – he just wanted to enjoy this feeling, having you so close and yet still wanting to pull you impossibly closer.
The feeling of your warmth around him mixed with the tousling of your hands in his hair was driving him crazy. Every touch from you, no matter how small, always ignited something within him that he couldn’t explain. He was so unapologetically, wholeheartedly in love with you.
And he’d just come so close to losing you.
Pain twisted his heart as he stared at you, watching your face scrunch up in the most beautiful way. Your head was tilted back with your eyes crinkled shut while his name was falling from your lips in hushed whispers. Each thrust was pushing you further up the wall before he would bring you back down again, and your arms wound themselves around his neck to help anchor yourself further.
You looked ethereal, and Jungkook was trying so hard to focus on you and not the negative thoughts that were once again settling uncomfortably in his mind. His body was fighting itself on whether he should succumb to the pleasure he was feeling or if he should submit to the dark cloud blanketing his mind.
His change in demeanor didn’t go unnoticed by you.
Jungkook continued to move inside of you, keeping a consistent pace, but something wasn’t right. He was looking at you, but he wasn’t looking at you. He had a pained expression on his face, and that’s what kicked your own worry into gear.
“Koo, baby, hey what’s wrong?” You held his face in both of your hands and watched as he crumbled underneath your touch. He had slid his hands up to rest against your back now in an attempt to embrace you further, hands trapped in between you and the wall.
You almost started panicking when you saw the tears start to brim in his eyes again.
“I just-” he choked on a cry and your heart wrenched at the sound, “I can’t stop thinking about it.” He was still moving but his pace had slowed down to a near stop.
“Thinking about what?” You weren’t sure you wanted to know but you needed him to talk to you.
“Thinking about losing you, I can’t-”
His hands reached up higher to grasp onto your shirt you were still wearing, clenching the fabric in his fists as he dragged it down. You could feel the collar of the front of your shirt tightening around you while he hid his head in the crook of your neck and started to shake. You wrapped your arms around him as tightly as you could and ran a hand through his hair, trying to soothe him.
“Please stay,” he whispered, almost too quiet for you to hear. “Please stay with me.”
“Koo-”
“I love you so much, I don’t want to lose you,” more sobs wracked through his body. He had otherwise stilled inside of you but made no effort to move away. “I can’t lose you, I-”
“Baby, look at me.”
Jungkook slowly brought his head up to face you, the sight making you want to break down yourself. He looked so defeated, so broken, and his eyes were shining with tears he didn’t bother hiding anymore.
You cradled his face in your hands, rubbing your thumbs across his cheekbones before they travelled to trace along the curves of his jawline.
You placed a gentle kiss on his forehead, listening as he tried to control his erratic breathing. “I won’t leave you.”
A soft kiss on his lips. “I’ll never leave you.”
You brushed his hair back from his face, and his eyes captivated you as they swirled with so much intense emotion.
“I promised you forever, and I intend to keep it. Nothing, and no one, is going to keep me from you. I love you too much to let that happen,” you granted him a sweet smile and brushed your thumb across his lower lip that had started to quiver. He sniffled as you continued.
“Do you remember our wedding vows?”
Jungkook swallowed as he nodded, seeming a little calmer now.
Your smile widened, and your own set of fresh tears had gathered in the corners of your eyes, ready to spill. “Remember how I told I would give you all of me? That I would give you the best of me?”
He nodded again, and your heart soared at the tiny smile he presented you with.
“I promised you those things. So, no matter what happens, I’ll never leave you. And with everything life throws as us from here on out, we’ll make it through together.”
His smile was widening into the familiar, bunny-like grin you knew and loved dearly. Your Jungkook was coming back to you, and it was almost like you could see the dark fog that had surrounded him evaporating before your very eyes.
“I love you, Jeon Jungkook.” You leaned up to tenderly press your lips to his once more, smiling into the kiss as he let out a content sigh. “You’re my person. My forever. Please always remember that.”
You had swept a long lock of hair back from his face as you finished your words, and while you were distracted with that, Jungkook stared at you like you hung the moon and all the stars.
Your declarations of love stirred something inside of him and it dawned on him then that he was still inside of you. This was made more evident when you shifted in his embrace, probably to make yourself more comfortable since you were still against the wall, but it caused your walls to clench around him.
He closed his eyes and groaned, the sound causing arousal to radiate throughout your body. The two of you clearly must have forgotten the position you were in but that was no longer the case when you felt him twitch inside of you.
“Fuck,” he moaned at the sight of you when he opened his eyes again, his hands letting go of your shirt in favor of settling on your waist. Your cheeks were still flushed, with drying tear stains running down them. You were panting softly and Jungkook’s heart felt like it might burst with all the love he had for you.
“I love you,” he declared while he brushed his nose with yours. “And I honestly cannot believe I forgot I was fucking you, like how does that even happen.”
You giggled, kissing the tip of his nose before you drew back to rest contentedly against the wall. “I’m not sure, but do you perhaps want to finish what we started?”
You moved your hips as best you could at your current angle, and it pushed his cock further inside you, making you both moan at the action. He captured one of your hands in his and brought it up to place a kiss on your knuckles.
“Will you still let me give you all of me,” you reiterated your phrase from earlier in the night before all of this started. Jungkook’s eyes had darkened now with lust and he gave you a sly smile.
“Always, baby,” was his response. “Question now though,” he leaned down to let his lips ghost along your neck, making you shiver, “is can you take all of me?”
You tugged on his hair for him to look up at you, making him hiss in the process. You gave him your best challenging stare, and hoped it was convincing.
“Always,” you copied him, “I can easily take anything you give me.”
Jungkook arched an eyebrow and you felt his length twitch at your words. “Is that so?
You barely had time to nod before he was pinning your hand that he was holding on the wall beside your head, his other one gripping your waist hard enough now you knew it would leave a mark.
He pulled out almost all the way before he thrusted back into you hard, making you whine embarrassingly loud. He chuckled dark and low then, squeezing your hand as he intertwined your fingers.
“Too much for you, angel?” Jungkook knew he couldn’t keep this up forever and that he’d eventually crack himself, but he never missed an opportunity to tease you like this. “Thought you said you could take everything I give you.”
You nodded vigorously, not an easy feat with your head leaning against the wall. “I can, I can take it,” you breathed out, clenching around him to try and persuade him to move again. He stuttered out a low moan, determined to not lose his composure just yet.
“Yeah? You sure? Does that mean you want more?” He was shallowly moving inside of you at a torturously slow pace, the drag of his cock against your walls pulling a loud noise of desperation from your throat.
“Please,” you begged, not even caring how desperate you sounded. You just wanted to feel him, all of him, and your core throbbed at the thought of him finally relenting and fucking you how you wanted. “Please give it to me. Please give me more.”
“Fuck, baby, I love hearing you beg for me,” Jungkook moaned, readjusting his grip on your hip. “Gonna give you exactly what you want.”
He hungrily kissed you for a few moments, sinking further into you before he pulled back, panting as he placed his forehead against yours, eyes closed.
“Angel?” His voice was low and just the tone alone made you clench.
“Y-yes?”
He opened his eyes and smiled. “You might wanna hold on tight.”
You just had enough time to wrap your unoccupied arm around his back before he started pounding into you like his life depended on it. He slammed into you repeatedly, making you scream out his name over and over again whenever he’d hit that bundle of nerves inside of you. You gripped his shirt to have something to ground yourself with, and your eyes rolled back as he increased his pace.
Jungkook was grunting into your skin, teeth grazing against your neck. “You feel so fucking good, always so tight and perfect for me, my perfect angel.” He squeezed your hand hard enough that his knuckles were taut, but it didn’t hurt you. If anything, it turned you on more because he was finally letting go, caring more about just being in the moment with you than potentially hurting you.
And you knew he still did care about that, he always would; he was Jungkook, after all. But time and time again you had pleaded with him to stop handling you like you would break under the slightest amount of pressure. This was the first time he did without hesitation or working himself up to it.
And you fucking loved it.
In fact, it was overwhelming enough to the point where you knew you weren’t going to last long at all with the way he was drilling into you. All the emotions the two of you had endured tonight mixed with the passionate entanglement you found yourself wrapped up in now, it was no surprise that you were hurtling toward your undoing at a very fast pace.
“Koo, baby, oh my God-” you finally found your voice again, running your nails down his back, hard enough that if he hadn’t been still wearing his shirt, you’re sure it would have left scratch marks.
“Fuck, angel, can feel you around me, always so good for me,” his tongue darted out past his lips before he captured your bottom one between his teeth and tugged on it gently. “Always my good girl.”
His words made you spasm around him, and he moaned loudly at the feeling, eyes fluttering shut. His damp hair was falling into his face so you brushed it back, gasping at the sight of him.
You’d seen Jungkook like this many times before, but this time? This time was different.
A few curls were still framing his face but he had his head tilted back and his lips parted as the most amazing sounds escaped from them. His brows were furrowed and he looked almost pained, but in a completely different way than he had earlier that night.
Your heart ached at the memory, but you didn’t have long to think about it before he pulled you more flush against his chest, now opting to grab your ass with both hands so he could move you up and down his cock with his strength alone.
“Holy shit,” he breathed out, “I love you so much, angel, just wanna stay with you like this forever.” He was speeding up again and with the new angle, your body felt like it was on fire. You couldn’t even make a noise as the stimulation kept hitting you in wave after wave.
“You said earlier,” Jungkook continued, a little breathless now but never letting up on his powerful thrusts, “that I was ­– fuck – that I was your person.”
You nodded, still not really able to say anything or make any sound because your orgasm was approaching fast and you didn’t want it to happen so soon. Not until you knew he was there with you.
“Did you mean it,” he asked, hooded eyes trying to search yours. You kissed him with all the strength you could muster, swallowing down his moans as your walls clenched around him.
“Of course I did. I meant everything I said earlier.” A high-pitched moan tore itself from your throat when his hips snapped into you harder at your words.
“Fuck, it always does something to me when you say things like that,” he was losing his composure now, you could tell it by the way he sounded.
His admission made you chuckle fondly. “You know, you said something similar the first time we were together.”
Jungkook opened his eyes to stare at you and grinned at the memory. “Yeah, I did. Meant it then and I mean it now too.”
“I’m glad I still have that kind of effect on you,” you responded, breaking off to moan loudly at a harsher thrust. Jungkook’s grip on you tightened, and he increased his pace, finally pulling you over the edge.
“You do, holy shit, you really do. I hope I can say the same- fuck,” Jungkook knew you were close with the way your walls kept spasming around him every few seconds. “Gonna cum for me, baby?”
You nodded and whined, holding onto his shirt for dear life while he rocked you through the first stages of your euphoric bliss. He was panting right by your ear now, the sounds making your eyes roll back.
“Go on, cum for me then. Fucking love when you cum all over my cock,” Jungkook’s filthy words had you moaning out his name. “My beautiful angel,” he continued, pulling down the collar of your shirt slightly so he could place a kiss on your collarbone. “Always so pretty for me.”
“Fuck, I’m close, Koo, want you there with me,” you opened your eyes in time to see him pulling his lip between his teeth.
“I’m right there, baby, let go for me,” he reached in between the two of you and barely brushed your clit before your sudden orgasm made you clench so hard around him that he had to throw his head back and let out a guttural moan.
“Angel, fuuuuck, I’m right there, I’m-” you crashed your lips against his and swallowed down every loud noise he made, feeling his lips tremble against yours as his hips stuttered when he filled you up with his release.
He broke apart from you with a gasp, leaning his head back and letting out a strained “holy fuck” before he looked at you again. He slowed down now, thrusting a few more times before he stilled completely, breathing hard.
He moved you away from the wall, and you thought he might put you down but instead he tightened your legs more securely around him and walked the two of you over to the nearest bathroom to shower, his lips never leaving yours the whole way there.
Thank fuck Jungkook had such great muscle memory and knew where he was going because you definitely couldn’t have pulled that off.
He stayed inside you until he was able to put you in the shower, helping you discard the rest of your clothes before he did the same and joined you. It was your usual ritual and preferred form of aftercare since the water from the shower soothed any sore muscles and it helped you get clean in the process. Not to mention it was another way for you to be close to Jungkook, him only reiterating that truth now and he pulled your back against his chest so he could massage shampoo into your hair.
“Love you,” he whispered softly, placing a kiss on your temple since you leaned your head back at the feeling of his touch. He treated you so delicately now, the complete opposite of how he was just fucking you up against the wall. You loved moments like this just as much, always receptive to everything Jungkook did, every touch that flittered across your skin.
“I love you,” was your response as you turned around to wrap your arms around his neck and pulled him into a chaste kiss. He smiled into it, his fingertips brushing against the skin right above your waist.
After your shower, Jungkook carried you upstairs, ignoring your attempts at getting him to put you down because as you told him repeatedly your legs worked just fine and you could walk by yourself. His response?
“Don’t care, still wanna carry you.”
All you could do then was huff, pulling a laugh from the man you loved so much, the sound always beautiful and able to make your heart skip a beat.
When you were both snuggled into bed, you found it hard to sleep. There were still things you two needed to discuss, but you didn’t have the energy – and not really the want – right now to bring them up.
However, Jungkook did.
“Hey,” he was running his hand through your hair as you were laying your head on his shoulder. You hummed in response.
“I’m sorry,” he started, and before you could interrupt he quickly went on. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you, but I’m also sorry about how I acted earlier.”
“Koo, it’s fine-”
“Please don’t,” his eyes were pleading and you let him continue.
“It’s not fine, it’s- I get in my head sometimes and it can be hard to come back from that. You’re always able to bring me back, but tonight…fuck, it was bad.” There was a frown on his face now and you tried to make it disappear by placing a kiss on his cheek.
“I kept thinking about how maybe I’m not the best for you-”
You couldn’t help interrupting this time. “Jungkook, you are the best for me.”
“We don’t know that though-”
“I don’t have to, because I know in my heart that you’ll do whatever it takes to make sure we have the best life together, the same as I’ll do for you.” You brushed a curl out of his face before you continued, “Only for you.”
He cracked a smile. “That’s my line.”
You shrugged, giggling when Jungkook began trying to poke your sides. “Regardless though, I don’t want you feeling that way. You’re enough, Jungkook, you’re more than enough.”
His smile widened. “Really?”
“Really.” You thought about it for a second. “What can I do to convince you?”
He raised an eyebrow, eyes full of mischief. “Well, I can think of a way…” he said in a suggestive tone, making you roll your eyes before you turned away from him. His laughter fell on your ears and you couldn’t help the smile that broke out on your face.
“Hey, c’mon, you know I’m just kidding,” he turned you to face him again, running his hand up and down your side now.
“No you’re not,” you snorted.
He pretended to think about it for a moment. “Ok, you’re right- but­ I know you’re too tired so I’m half kidding? Sorta?”
It was your turn to laugh then, huddling closer to him as you wrapped your arms around his neck and placed a kiss on his throat.
His hands found their way into your hair again, and he continued to run them through the strands long enough that you almost fell asleep until he spoke up again.
“We need to do something about him, though.”
The way he said ‘him’ let you know exactly who he was talking about.
You nodded, sliding your head up to lay in the crook of his neck. “We will. But that’s a problem for another day. Right now,” you yawned, “we need sleep.”
He chuckled and kissed the top of your head. “Get some sleep, angel. I’ll stay up a little bit to make sure you’re ok. Jin said it was a good idea for tonight, anyway.”
You were already nuzzling deeper into his embrace, barely registering his words. “Mm-hmm,” came your sluggish response. “Goodnight, Koo.”
“Night, baby,” was his last response you heard before slumber took over, the feeling of his strong arms around you more comforting than anything else you’d ever known.
Jungkook stayed awake for a few hours, listening to your soft snoring and observing you as you slept peacefully. There was a gentle ache tugging at his heart as he remembered everything that you’d been through that night, but when you unconsciously snuggled closer, he felt the ache dissipate.
He made a promise to himself that whatever happened in the future, he would be there for you. He would keep you as safe as he could, and love you with everything he had.
After all, you were his person, just as he was yours, and he hoped that’s how it would stay.
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dreamwritesimagines · 3 years
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Burn The Witch 17 - Bad Habit [Bucky Barnes x Reader]
A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful support and feedback my loves ! ❤ Here’s the next chapter, I hope you like it as well and please let me know what you think! ❤ Thank you! ❤❤❤
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Warnings: Enemies to lovers, fake dating, mentions of blood, sex, violence, death, manipulation, language, guns, knives.
Summary: Everyone needs help sometimes.
Series Masterlist
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It wasn’t that there weren’t any spies who didn’t lie to their superiors.
There just weren’t any spies who lied to their superiors and lived to tell the tale, especially on high stakes missions like these.
You tried to convince yourself that the General would never find out, but that wasn’t the only reason why you were freaking out. Putting false information on your report was bad, yes, but the worst part was that you were beginning to find it harder and harder to report whatever information you found out about your fake boyfriend.
For some reason, you had a feeling it wouldn’t just stop at one lie.
Your eyes opened as you snapped out of your sleep all of a sudden and you took a look at the window, but it was still dark outside. That wasn’t the problem, the problem was that you had gone to sleep with Bucky by your side but now you were in an empty bed.
“Bucky?” you whispered into the darkness and sat up in the bed. After kicking off the covers, you made your way to the living room but as soon as you got there, he opened his eyes and turned his head to look at you.
“Hey,” you whispered, “Are you okay? Are the bandages too tight?”
He pressed a hand over his side to check the bandage, then shook his head.
“No, no…” he said, “Did I wake you up?”
“Nope,” you said, “Is the bed too uncomfortable?”
“The opposite.”
You tilted your head “The bed is too…comfortable?”
He let out a small bitter chuckle and ran a hand over his face as you stepped into the room, then sat down on the floor as well.
“I’m not really used to…” he waved a hand to motion around you, “It’s not familiar to be comfortable.”
Ah.
Of course. You should’ve seen it coming, he was a soldier and coming back home was always so hard for soldiers, especially in Bucky’s situation.
You had so many nightmares after bad missions, you had no idea how you would sleep if you had anything close to what he had been through.
���Do you want to talk about it?” you asked and he shook his head again.
“I’m sorry,” he said, “I was hoping this wouldn’t happen.”
“Don’t be,” you murmured, “Do you want to be alone?”
“No,” he paused for a moment, “Please stay.”
Your heart skipped a beat and you pushed your hair behind you ear, taking a look at the pillow and the throw on the couch, then grabbed them and put them on the floor.
“Y/N, you’re not sleeping on the floor.”
You rushed to the bedroom to grab your pillows and the blanket off the bed, then went back to the living room.
“What are you doing?”
“It’ll be fun,” you said, putting the pillows and blanket on the floor. “Like we’re outside, only not with…annoying bugs.”
“You’re not serious.”
You plopped down the floor and gave him a bright smile. “I am!”
“Darling….” He started but shook his head with a sigh as you lay on your side, pulling the blanket over your shoulders.
“I’m very stubborn, you’re wasting your time if you’re trying to change my mind,” you informed him and he shot you a small smile, then lay down as well. You entwined your fingers with his, then looked up at the ceiling.
“My virtue is so screwed,” you pointed out, making him huff out a laughter.
“Oh absolutely.”
“I mean, there goes my hopes of…” you trailed off, “White picket fence house and puffy skirts and homemade pies.”
“What, you don’t want them with me?” he asked and your heart skipped a beat, then you stole a look at him.
“Can you even imagine that?”
“Yes I can.”
“I think I picture a movie,” you said, “There’s this….big yard, and white picket fences and we painted the house white but the door is red.  And there’s a dog and— feel free to stop me anytime, Bucky.”
“Don’t,” he smiled as if picturing what you were describing made him happy, “Just keep going.”
“We have a rescue dog,” you said, “We got him from a shelter and named him… um, we named him something funny.”
“Is it a big dog?”
“Yeah and you take him on a run every night. Mornings with me, nights with you.”
“That’s a good schedule.”
“He likes me better.”
“Ouch,” his smile widened, “I don’t blame him.”
You hummed, “And you have a mustache I think.”
He shot you a look, “If you say a Clark Gable mustache…”
“I’m just putting it out there—”
“Nope. Not gonna happen.”
“Fine,” you let out a laugh, “And we have an apple tree in the garden. Wait no— we have an apple tree and a peach tree.”
“How big is the garden?”
“Not so big,” you said, “Like in those movies.”
He paused for a moment and you stole a look at him.
“You wanted a big garden?”
“Well,” he said, “We need a big garden for the treehouse.”
“We have a treehouse?”
“Depends,” he said slowly, as if he was intimidated, “Kids love treehouses.”
Your heart skipped a beat at the thought of having kids with him, for the hundredth time the image of a happier future where you weren’t a spy flashing in front of your eyes. You tried to stop the smile pulling at your lips.
“Yeah,” you said, “I think our kids would love them too.”
You could see the ghost of a smile on his face as he rubbed his thumb over your hand.
“Yeah?”
“Mm hm,” you yawned, “And in summer we would put a bouncy house thing in the garden and we would put a hammock between the peach tree and the apple tree and we would relax there while the kids are wreaking havoc in the bouncy house.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
“Yeah,” you murmured, sleep luring you as you closed your eyes, taking in his scent, “Sounds like a good plan.”
                                                           ***
You really didn’t have time to second guess yourself today. Yes you had lied to the General and spent the whole night with Bucky imagining an impossible future but now, you had to keep your head in the game.
You would figure out what you would do. Eventually.
This was a mission. You had to start acting like it.
“I don’t think I like this one,” you called out from the dressing room and in a second, the door opened to reveal Chloe who raised her brows.
“Wow.”
You tilted your head and stepped outside to look at yourself better. The gold body chain wrapped around the lingerie gleamed under the shop’s bright lights and you fixed the suspenders, clicking your tongue.
“Nah. I don’t think so.”
“Wow,” she said again, “I hate you so much, why do you look so hot in lingerie?”
“Chloe, every woman looks hot in lingerie,” you said as you walked back to the dressing room to try the next lingerie set. It was a red lace bodysuit and after a moment of struggle, you got into it, and opened the door again.
“Not this one either.”
“I can’t believe you’re going to sleep with him!” Chloe squealed, “Are you excited?”
You cleared your throat, “It’s just a mission.”
“Yeah but you want to sleep with him?”
“The dude is hot.”
“Y/N.”
“What?” you fixed your hair and frowned at your reflection, “Nope. I don’t like this. It’s too….meh.”
“I doubt Barnes would say meh if he saw you in this,” she said, “He’d probably pass out. You look like you’re about to grab your whip or something. Oh— Y/N, you should like tie him up or something! If we’re not going full on vintage, show him the modern fun times!”
You shot her a look, “Something tells me he doesn’t like to be tied up Chloe.”
“Why not?”
“Uh, because HYDRA scumbags tied him up a lot and he still has nightmares about it?”
“Ah,” she said, “I forgot about that. Hey, maybe he could tie you up!”
“I’ll tell you the same thing I said to Julian when he suggested I called him sir in bed,” you stated, “No thank you, I don’t do that sub thing.”
“Now I kind of wish we specified your cover’s kinks,” she heaved a sigh, “It’d make things so much easier.”
“My cover likes to be in control.”
“No, real you likes to be in control,” she corrected you, “Nothing about your cover says control.”
“Chloe—“ you started but stopped talking when the shop assistant approached you.
“Do you find it to your liking?”
“Um, not exactly,” you said, “I mean I like the color but overall—“
“Do you have bridal sets?” Chloe cut you off and your eyes widened.
“Easy there.”
“Like maybe soft pastel tones…. The whole thing though, garter belt and stockings and everything.”
“Of course!” she said, “We have some new arrivals, let me bring them here.”
“Chloe!” you whispered as the shop assistant walked away, “What the fuck?”
“Think about the dresses we picked for your cover,” she said, “Soft pastels. It makes sense that your cover would pick those shades in lingerie too.”
“Bridal? Really?”
“I mean, Barnes will want to propose you right there when he sees you in them so…” she grinned at you while you narrowed your eyes at her, “Come on! I’m very curious about how he is in bed.”
You tilted your head, “Is there anything you’d like to tell me?” you asked, “Because love triangles are so early 2000s.”
“Hilarious,” she deadpanned, “And no. My type is more—relaxed. Less serious.”
You scoffed and leaned back on the wall, crossing your arms, “You could just say Keith.”
She shifted her weight, biting on her lip. “I mean…” she trailed off, “He still doesn’t make a move though.”
“Why don’t you make a move?”
“I could never!” she gasped, “Nope. Ever. Besides, I thought you were against me dating spies.”
“I am,” you admitted, “But it’s your love life. If you want to date a guy who has an extremely dangerous job and worry about whether or not he will come back to you alive….”
“You’re very romantic, Y/N,” she said as the assistant came closer, holding the set. Even you had to admit, it looked very sexy and beautiful at the same time, with soft pastel lace adorning the fabric, and you took a look at the basque, then walked inside.
“Besides, you’re the one to talk.” Chloe called out as you got into the lingerie, then ran your fingers over the garter belt.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Your boyfriend does dangerous stuff too.”
“Fake boyfriend,” you corrected her, fixing the basque, and as soon as your reflection caught your eye, you raised your brows.
“Okay, maybe you had a point,” you admitted and opened the door, and Chloe grinned at you.
“See,” she said, “This is what I was talking about.”
You smirked at her and leaned on your hip, still looking in the mirror.
“Fine, I like this one.”
“Told you,” she sang and you crossed your arms.
“What dangerous stuff has he been doing lately?”
“He was texting with Wilson about some HYDRA person,” Chloe said, “Apparently they want to go after him. Tonight.”
“What HYDRA person?”
“No clue. And we can’t send a team because then it’ll be obvious— Y/N, I know that look,” she shook her head fervently, “No.”
You tried to look as innocent as possible, “I didn’t say anything.”
“You want to go after the same HYDRA person as them, but you have specific orders and we still haven’t got the okay from the top of the chain of command to go after that scum.”
“Chloe.”
“No. I’m not going to give you the address.”
“Well if Barnes ends up dead, I won’t have a mission will I?”
“He’s going to be fine, he fights better than you.”
You gasped, “How dare you?”
“He fights better than everyone in the division!” she insisted, “He can take care of himself.”
You pouted, “Fine,” you said, “I guess I won’t give Keith the idea of taking you out on a date then.”
She paused for a moment, “That’s bribery.”
“Uh huh.”
“You have no shame, do you?”
You motioned at the lingerie set you were in, “Does it look like it?”
She rubbed at her eye and let out a small whine.
“If my dad asks—“
“He’s not going to know.”
“Do you promise to behave?”
“I always behave,” you stated, making her snort.
“I don’t believe that for a second.”
“Please?” you asked, “I promise I’ll be safe. I’ll just make sure he’s alive, that’s it. I won’t get involved in anything.”
“You promise?”
“Cross my heart.”
Chloe pursed her lips. “For your information, I think picnics are romantic.”
“Dully noted,” you said, “Trust me, he will take you on a picnic. So, do we have a deal?”
She rolled her eyes, then nodded, making you let out a laugh and walk back to the changing room.
“I want candles on that picnic too!”
“Send me the list of your demands,” you called out, “I’ll make sure they’re all covered.”
                                                      ***
In all honesty, Chloe was terrible at saying no to people, especially the people she loved.
You fixed your ski mask as you took a look at the text Bucky had sent you after you asked him what he was doing;
Nothing much, going home soon. You?  
“Liar liar….” You sang as you typed your reply.
Soup Kitchen was so tiring, I think I’ll go to bed early tonight.
Fine. Maybe he wasn’t the only liar in this relationship.
You took a look at the building’s window through your binoculars, then lowered them to check your phone when it vibrated.
Good idea. Sweet dreams darling.
You tried to ignore the smile on your lips but as soon as you heard gunshots coming from the building, your head shot up.
“Shit,” you murmured and tried to see what was happening, but it was impossible. Whoever they were, they were definitely staying away from windows.
“Not gonna get involved,” you muttered, “Not gonna get involved, it’s stupid and puts the mission in danger. I’ll stay right here, he can take care of himself.”
For about five seconds, it worked.
“I’m being stupid,” you mumbled to yourself as you grabbed the gear around your waist, then checked whether it would actually carry you, “I’m being so fucking stupid, I haven’t even slept with the dude yet….”
You went over to the edge of the rooftop, then took a deep breath, grabbed the cables and jumped to crash through the window of the building the gunshots were coming from. You pulled your gun to shoot the person who looked like he was about to shoot Bucky, sending him to the ground and Bucky pushed the guy he was fighting with through the wall, then turned around to point the gun at you but as soon as he did, he frowned.
“….Shrike?”
“Hi handsome.” You unbuckled the rope from the harness, sending it up to the rooftop again as he lowered his gun. “Need a hand?”
Chapter 18
537 notes · View notes
ragingbookdragon · 3 years
Text
If All Of The Kings Had Their Queens On The Throne
Batsis x Ghost-Maker One-Shot
Word Count: 4K Warnings: Explicit Language, Slight Angst, Mature Themes
Author's Note: This is a direct continuation of the previous fic! Enjoy! -Thorne
**********************************************************************
When the door to The Haunt didn’t immediately open, she frowned and clicked the button. “Hey! Lemme in!”
For a moment, there was nothing, then she heard, “Apologies Miss Wayne. Ghost-Maker is busy training. Shall I alert him?”
She sighed. “Nah, just let me in and I’ll get him.”
“Of course.”
The doors split open, and she walked into the base, immediately rolling her eyes at the colors, or better yet the lack of color at all. She had no idea what spurred him to pick white as one of the main colors in everything he wore and used, but God if it didn’t make him look like a psychopath. A snort passed her lips at her little joke, and she wandered around the desk setup and through one of the curtained areas until she heard boxing gloves meeting a punching bag.
Gently tugging the curtain aside, she paused, leaning against the doorway, and watched his back. He was shirtless and had headphones in, as he usually was and did when he trained alone, and his muscles rippled each time he threw a powerful strike. She couldn’t help but watch him; he’d always been so diligent when it came to his training, and if she hadn’t known him better than she did, she would’ve assumed all he did was train. She was very fond of it though. Very fond of him.
“You going to stand there or are you going to get a set of gloves and spar with me?”
She shook herself from her thoughts to see him rounding the bag, throwing a devastating kick; she snorted. “No thanks, Ghost. I just got over having a cracked skull.” Walking over, she neared the space, but stayed just far enough that she wouldn’t get struck.
“I’m actually here to invite you over to the manor tonight.” She said, watching as his eyes flitted to hers behind the mask. “I take it you know.”
“About the little pool party Bruce throws for everyone? Yes. I keep hearing about it over the Ghost-Net.”
She smiled. “It’s a lot of fun, Ghost. You’d have fun.”
He scoffed. “What? Being surrounded by every single hero this side of the galaxy? No thank you, (Y/N). I’d rather not.”
Rolling her eyes, she grabbed the punching bag and held it, looking at him. “You’re not going to make any friends if you spend all your time cooped up in here.”
“I’m not looking to make friends,” he retorted, throwing another punch that sent shock-waves through her arms to her core. “I’m here to clean up Gotham.”
(Y/N) gazed at him. “Sure I can’t persuade you?”
“Positive.”
She shrugged. “Then you leave me no choice.” Leveling him with a strong expression, she warned, “As the newest member of the Batfamily, you have to attend the pool party. It’s tradition and anyone who doesn’t, has to take patrol routes for everyone for a month straight.”
Ghost-Maker stopped dead in his tracks and looked at her. “You’re lying.”
(Y/N) sucked in a breath dramatically, “Ghost, I never lie.” She looked to the ceiling. “Icon, run the conversations from my phone named, ‘Bat-Chat’ and tell him I’m not lying.”
After a moment, the AI’s voice came over, clear and positive. “Miss Wayne is correct, sir. Record texts have shown that those who do not attend the parties thrown by the family for the other superheroes are subject to various torture techniques.”
“What!” (Y/N) shouted. “No, we don’t!”
“You said on June eighth that your brother Timothy Jackson Drake was going to be swirlied for missing the party.”
She sputtered. “I was joking! We don’t swirly each other. We just force our patrol routes on each other.” (Y/N) glanced at Ghost-Maker. “If you don’t come, you’re going to take patrol from me, Dick, Jason, Tim, Cass, Steph, Duke, and Damian. You really wanna patrol all month by yourself? All that territory? Think of the time and energy it’ll take, Ghost.”
Ghost-Maker stared her down for a minute, mulling over his choices, then he finally sighed, resigned to his fate. “Fine. I’ll come over tonight.”
(Y/N) grinned. “Nope, you gotta get ready now. We’re arriving together.”
“You annoy me.” He griped, bypassing her to the doorway, and she followed him towards the stairs and to his bedroom where he entered the bathroom and got in the shower. She waited on the bed, gazing around his room while he showered.
“Who all is attending this party? That you know for sure.”
(Y/N) blinked, taking a moment to think. “Uh, all of the Justice League, the Titans and Teen Titans, the Outlaws, a few Green Lanterns…and probably a few anti-heroes but we’ll see.” She shrugged. “So pretty much everyone we interact with on a normal basis.”
“I heard Harley is coming too.”
“Yeah, she’s technically part of the family at this point.” (Y/N) said. “She’d be upset if we didn’t invite her over.”
Ghost-Maker stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist and she stood from the bed, wandering in behind him as he lathered his face in shaving cream.
“Trying to show out in front of everyone, Ghost?” she joked, leaving back against the door-frame of the small cabinet behind them.
“Bruce doesn’t keep himself kempt all the time. I do,” he remarked, flicking out the straight razor; he raised it to his jaw, and she hummed warningly, causing his brown eyes to meet hers in the mirror. “What?”
(Y/N) shook her head. “I’m just worried you’ll cut yourself.”
“I’ve been shaving my face since I was fifteen, (Y/N).”
“So that scar on your cheekbone isn’t from cutting yourself?”
He gazed at her. “You know why I have that scar.”
“I do.” She answered, then leaned away from the wall, shifting until she was sitting on the bathroom counter in front of him. Taking the razor, she tilted his chin up and carefully, scraped it down his cheek before rinsing it. “I gave it to you when you called me a coward.”
“I wasn’t expecting you to hit me that hard.” Ghost-Maker replied, coffee eyes focused on her face; she felt exposed under his knowing gaze.
She chuckled. “I think that was the first time I really surprised you that I wasn’t just my brother’s twin sister following him around to make sure he was safe.”
“You can’t blame me for thinking you were. You never joined in the training.”
“I learned better watching then doing.” (Y/N) rinsed the razor and tipped his head back as she drug the instrument down the exposed skin of his throat. “Most people are fearful when someone holds a razor to their neck,” she murmured, carefully shaving his Adam’s apple.
“I’m not afraid of you.”
Her hands stilled ever so slightly as she gaped at him. Normally he would’ve said, “I don’t feel fear” but now he said he wasn’t afraid of her. She wanted to hope it was because of what had occurred the last month, her confessing her feelings, him replying that he couldn’t love her like she did him—he’d not totally ruled out caring for her, at least that’s what she saw his words being. They’d not talked about it more than that night, merely going back to work, but she could tell that Ghost-Maker’s demeanor towards her had changed a minute amount. He watched her more. Was…softer with her.
(Y/N) smiled. “I’m glad to hear that.” She rinsed the razor and looked over his face for a moment, then she grabbed the towel and wet it, gently brushing over the shaving cream still on his face. Patting his face dry, she nodded. “Looks good. No nicks.”
“Thank you,” he approved, but didn’t move, keeping his eyes on her and she couldn’t help but look down, suddenly nervous under his gaze.
Her eyes widened when she saw the expanse of his chest though and she reached up, fingers delicately tracing a jagged and raised scar in the middle of his chest. Even healed it looked angry and a bolt of sadness hit her in the heart.
“You’re sad.” He noted. For a psychopath who didn’t feel empathy, he was actually good at discerning when people felt sad—or maybe it was just because he’d known her so long.
(Y/N) nodded, whispering, “There aren’t many scars on mine and Bruce’s bodies that look like this one.” Her fingers moved to one on the right side of his ribs and she frowned. “We’ve always had someone to stitch us up, or we did it for one another. But I can’t help but wonder…” her eyes met his. “Who did it for you? Who stitched the ones you couldn’t reach and do yourself?”
Her chest hurt. “Who was there for you when I wasn’t?” she leaned forward and pressed her forehead to the center of his chest. He was so warm, and she sighed, willing herself to not tear up. “I’m sorry, K.”
“For what?” he questioned, a hand coming up behind her, palm resting against the back of her neck.
“For leaving you behind,” (Y/N) answered, deciding then to wrap her arms around his waist, turning her face so her cheek rested to his chest. “I should’ve stayed with you.”
Ghost-Maker made a noise in his throat, and she wasn’t sure if it was agreement or bitterness. “And if you had, you wouldn’t have raised your family.”
She sighed. “Yeah…I know…but even during that time I couldn’t help but wonder how your journey was going. How you and your tech were evolving throughout the years.” (Y/N) pulled back slightly and looked at him. “I used to imagine what it’d be like to be there with you. To fight beside you. To live out your dream with you.”
His hand shifted from the back of her neck to cup her cheek and he tilted her head up, leaning down to kiss her. She closed her eyes, arms shifting from around his waist to wrap around his neck and his free hand gripped her waist, pulling her against him. Ghost-Maker shifted, pressing his lips to the underside of her jaw as his fingers dipped under her thigh, pulling it up until (Y/N) got the hint to cock it around his hip.
“K,” she breathed as he sunk his teeth into her neck, biting hard enough that it had her inhaling sharply, fingers twisting in the dark hair at the nape of his neck. She felt him smile against her skin.
“What do you want?” he asked, pressing surprisingly gentle kisses to where he’d bit as the hand that was on her cheek lowered to push up the blouse that stopped at her waist. His fingers dipped underneath, rubbing against her skin and he asked again, this time firmer, “(Y/N), what do you want?”
Her heart was hammering in her chest, and she could barely think, could barely form words. “I—”
A shrill beeping startled the two of them, well, her more than him, and she finally got herself to breathe. “That’s Bruce calling.” She uncurled one of her hands from his neck to reach for the phone in her pocket, but he caught it.
“Call him back.” Ghost-Maker said, grabbing a fistful of her blouse, starting to pull up.
(Y/N) shrugged his hand off. “If Bruce’s calling, it means he needs my help.” He pulled away and giving her a look, one she met firmly. “I need to take it.”
They gazed at each other for a moment and then he harrumphed, pulling away from her, and walked from the bathroom to his closest.
She sighed and pulled out her phone, answering it. “Hello?”
Are you on your way yet? The party’s already started and everyone’s asking where you both are.
Clearing her throat, she replied, “Yeah, he’s getting his swim trunks.” She glanced out the doorway. “You own trunks, don’t you, Ghost?”
“Do I somehow give you the impression that I’m incompetent?” he shot back, and she rolled her eyes.
“Ass.” She put the phone back to her ear. “We’ll be there in fifteen.”
Be careful. Love you.
“We will. And I love you too.” She ended the call and hopped off the bathroom counter, flicking off the lights as she walked out, seeing him throwing a bag over his shoulder.
“I’m ready to be bored out of my mind.” He grunted and she rolled her eyes again.
“Oh, shut up. You’re going to have a great time. I promise.”
Ghost-Maker glared at her as he pulled the white and black mask over his eyes and nose. “And how do you know?”
(Y/N) grinned, shoving him in the stomach as she walked past him. “Because I’m going to be there all night.”
***
“See!” she chirped as he sunk into the hot tub. “This isn’t so bad.” She handed him a drink. “Free drinks, laughter, and swimming. Fun, huh?”
He grunted, sipping the margarita she’d given him. “Your family and their friends are loud.”
(Y/N) looked over his head towards the other pool, grinning as her eldest nephew threw her youngest into the pool, then turned and threw his best friend. Laughter peeled from the entire group in the pool.
“Yeah…but that’s how you know they’re having a good time.” Her eyes drifted to Bruce who was fondly watching Jason and Roy grill, occasionally laughing as one of them told a joke. “Feelin’ good, Bruce?”
He took a sip of his brandy, sinking until his shoulders were covered by the running hot water. “Feeling great, (Y/N).” he held out his drink. “Put some ice in there? Please?”
She smiled and pulled her legs out of the hot tub, and really, it wasn’t exactly a hot tub because most were above ground, but Bruce being who he was, had redesigned it so that it and the pool were both in ground and connected.
Taking his glass, she rose and wandered over to the bar where a few of her friends were pouring drinks and chatting. “Hey Clark. Diana. How are you both tonight?”
Diana smiled and raised her wine glass. “I am well, (Y/N). How are you?”
“Can’t complain.” She said. “Clark, put an ice cube in here, would you?”
He did as she asked and dropped one in with the tongs. “I’m still surprised you got Ghost-Maker here. I assumed he wasn’t going to come.”
Her eyes flicked back over to the hot tub, and she watched Bruce tip his head back as he laughed, Ghost-Maker chuckling too; she smiled. “He’d never admit it, but he’s glad he came tonight. Anti-social as he usually is, he likes being included in things.” (Y/N) smiled at them and winked, walking back over.
She took her seat back on the side in the middle between Bruce and Ghost-Maker, handing her brother his brandy. “Clark licked all over the rim of your glass, Bruce. Just letting you know.” Feeling particularly childish, Bruce raised the glass to his lips and licked all around the glass. “You’re a child.” She remarked, then glanced to her side, seeing one of the Green Lanterns coming down the way.
“Kyle!” she greeted. “Join the fray!”
The artist smiled, then looked at the men in the hot tub. “I don’t want to intrude,” he said, and Bruce waved.
“Come on in.”
(Y/N) patted the wall between her legs and Kyle walked down the steps, shifting until his back pressed against the wall and she dropped her legs over his shoulders, fingers carding in his hair. “How’s it been going on Oa?”
He shrugged, sipping his beer. “It’s good. Can’t complain too much about saving the universe.”
She smirked. “Uh huh…and what’s this about you and Soranik?”
Kyle choked a bit on his beer, coughing slightly as she giggled. “It’s uh—complicated.” He tipped his head back, resting on her thighs so he could look up at her. “What about you? How’ve you been?”
(Y/N) sighed wistfully, combing back his hair. “Ain’t nothing changin’ but the weather…and the usual telling off the men in front of you for continually betting each other who can do the more stupid shit.”
At that, Kyle’s head tipped up and he first looked at Bruce, then to Ghost-Maker who merely drank from his margarita. “Uh…who’s that?” he asked quietly, and she snorted.
“Kyle, this is Ghost-Maker. Ghost, this is Kyle Rayner, the torch bearing Green Lantern.” She smushed his cheeks. “Isn’t he adorable?”
Ghost-Maker gave her an amused puff. “He is handsome, I’ll give you that.”
Kyle was glad the water had already flushed his skin because the way the man had flirted had made his cheeks warm. “Thank you.” He glanced back at her. “Is his name…?”
She nodded. “Yeah, he takes anonymity to a whole new level.” She tugged at a strand of his hair. “Did you know that only me, Bruce, and a few others know what he looks like and what his entire name is?”
He blinked in response. “That’s…hardcore secret identity, right there.”
“That’s because he doesn’t have any friends.” (Y/N) shot Ghost-Maker a grin. “But you can call him Ghost for short. It’s easier than the mouthful of Ghost-Maker.” The vigilante in return merely rolled his eyes and sipped his drink. “So, Kyle, have any new graphic novels in the works?”
“I do actually. Haven’t written them down but here’s an idea.” He brought up his hand out of the water and a green flash appeared in everyone’s vision. “See how you like it so far?”
(Y/N) huffed a laugh in disbelief. “This is so cool.” She grabbed the construct comic book and flipped through it. “Who’s the main?”
“Haven’t named her yet. But she’s a transgender, pansexual Native American who solves crimes as a superhero.” His cheeks flushed. “I know it’s ironic because we’re superheroes, but I couldn’t help it, you know?”
She nodded, seemingly impressed. “Figured out which tribe yet?”
“I was thinking possibly Cherokee. Or Mohawk.”
“I’ve got a MTF Kanienʼkehá꞉ka friend who lives in Quebec.” She said. “I’ll give her a call about working with you on this.”
Kyle lit up like the morning sun. “Really, (Y/N)? You’d do that?”
She looked down at him and shifted her thighs a bit, bumping his head. “Of course. You’re one of my best friends.”
“I love you, (Y/N).” he grinned, and she chuckled.
“I love you too, loser.”
Suddenly the speakers thumped, and her head shot up, looking towards Tim and Bart who were giggling. She pointed at them. “HEY! THIS IS NOT AN APPROPRIATE SONG!”
They merely giggled more and suddenly everyone was singing along to the raunchy song, well, the teens and young adults were but not her and the older people.
(Y/N) shoved Kyle off as she got up and ran towards the speakers. “WAP IS NOT AN APPROPRIATE SONG TO PLAY AT A POOL PARTY! THERE ARE CHILDREN PRESENT! TIMOTHY JACKSON, YOU GET BACK HERE WITH THAT IPHONE! TURN IT OFF!”
***
She smiled sweetly at her family and friends passed out in the living room, pillows and blankets thrown everywhere, arms slung over bodies, heads on stomachs and backs. It was nice to see them all so comfortable with each other, so tightly knit; it reminded her of a better time.
Most of the adults had gone home though some had stayed in extra rooms. She was sure that her brother and him had gone down to the cave to have it out just for the hell of it, but she was rather tired and decided to call it a night—though it was actually one am.
Closing the door behind her, she didn’t bother to go shower, planning to do it in the morning as she started stripping. First went the swimsuit cover, then the top and bottoms. She kicked her flip-flops off into the corner of the room and stretched her arms above her head, a quiet groan passing her lips as her joints and bones popped.
As she lowered her hands, a hand clamped around her mouth and another wound around her waist, tugging her back and she gasped against their palm, starting to struggle when she heard them chuckle. The sound, combined with the familiar smell of sandalwood wafting up her nose told her who it was, and they smiled against her ear. “Worried?”
She reached up and yanked his hand from her mouth, hissing, “You’re lucky I didn’t turn around and punch the shit out of you, K.”
“Promises, promises,” he murmured, pressing a kiss behind her ear and she shivered against his chest.
“What are you doing in here? I thought you and Bruce went to go spar?”
Ghost-Maker hummed, the hand around her waist starting to squeeze the flesh of her side. “We did. He said he was tired and went to bed.”
“And you didn’t go home?” her voice kicked up a notch when his other hand slipped from her grip and slid down her front.
“I didn’t want to go home.” He pressed his front against her rear and she gasped, one of her hands coming back to grab at his thigh, digging her nails in to keep him there. He smirked as she ground back against him. “Seems like you don’t want me going home either.”
(Y/N) swallowed thickly. “Something’s up with you tonight. You’re being a lot more…passionate than usual.”
He nipped at her neck, fingers delicately dancing over her abdomen. “I don’t like that Green Lantern friend of yours.”
“Who? Kyle?” she questioned confusedly. “Why?”
“He’s very free with himself towards you.”
At that, it was crystal clear, and she spun in his arms, looking at him, though she had to strain to see his face. “Are you jealous?”
“No.” He griped, though the way his jaw set, told her the truth.
“You are!” she laughed. “You’re jealous that I’m close with other men. That’s adorable.”
Ghost-Maker stared at her for a split moment, then he bent down and grabbed her legs, throwing her over his shoulder. (Y/N)’s gasp turned into a laugh as he marched towards the bed and tossed her onto it, watching as she rolled onto her back and laughed some more at him.
“God, you’re green, K.” she giggled, watching with hooded eyes as he shucked the swim trunks down to his feet and crawled onto the bed.
“I’m not envious of a glow-stick who’s never gotten this far with you.” He countered, grabbing her ankles; he yanked her down the bed and underneath him and she gazed up at him.
“Do you wanna know how many men have gotten this far with me?” (Y/N) challenged and Ghost-Maker stared into her eyes.
“It doesn’t matter how many because once I’m done with you, you won’t remember anyone but me.” He lowered his head, pressing open-mouthed kisses to her stomach, trailing downwards and she panted in anticipation when,
CRASH!
They started, and this time, he did too, both turning to the door, then to each other.
“What the hell—”
“OH SHIT! SOMEONE PUT OUT THE FIRE!”
(Y/N) grunted. “Oh my God, what did they do?”
“DON’T JUST STAND THERE! OH MY GOD SOMEONE CALL NINE-ONE-ONE! OR THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!”
“AUNT (Y/N)! DAD!”
She rolled out from underneath Ghost-Maker, ignoring his grabbing for her and she hurried to her door, yanking the bathrobe from the hook on the back. Slinging it on, she turned and pointed at the man. “Once I’m done out here, I’m coming back and you’re not going anywhere for a few hours.”
He smirked as he collapsed onto his back, taking himself in his hand. She almost burst into flames at the sight, and he purred, “You might wish to hurry, (Y/N). Wouldn’t want to miss anything.” His words tipped into a groan as his hand shifted along himself, and she scowled at him as she pulled the door open, his erotic frame illuminating in the hall light.
“You’d better watch it, K. We both know how mean I can get when I miss out.”
356 notes · View notes
literaturehoeenergy · 4 years
Text
Opportunity
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pairing: Corpse_Husband x fem!reader
genre: fluff i guess?
warnings: none
word count: 1,118
a/n: this is my first fan fiction so please go easy on me. lemme know if you want anything specific!
Being the little cousin of a famous YouTuber had its perks. Sean was friends with a lot of the gamers I was a fan of, so I got to interact with them a lot. They even invited me to play games with them from time to time. I was never really good at them, but it was fun to play. 
I was in the middle of the 1980 Friday the 13th when my phone lit up on my coffee table. 
Sean: Hey Y/N! Wanna play Among Us with me, Felix, and some friends?
I grinned and agreed, turning off my TV before making my way to my little office and powering on my PC. I clicked Sean’s Discord invite and smiled as I heard all the ruckus already. “Y/N!” Sean said cheerily. 
“Hi you guys,” I said meekly.
“Y/N, I’ve missed you, when are you coming to visit me?” Felix asked.
“Visit you? She’s my cousin!”
“She’s my cousin!” I laughed at their stupid antics.
“I want to come visit soon, maybe after this semester ends.” Another person popped up in the Discord call named “CORPSE”. CORPSE? That’s a scary name. I thought to myself. “So, I’m still terrible at this game, but I think we will have fun.”
“Oh, Y/N, this is Corpse.”
“Hello.” A very deep voice came through my headset. Woah.
“Hi, Corpse. I’m Y/N, Sean’s cousin.”
“It’s very nice to meet you.” I felt myself blush at the “very nice”, but shook my head and changed my character color to light green and put a flower on before the game started.
CREWMATE
Thank god.
I went around, doing all my tasks cheerily, humming to myself. I tried to stick with either Sean or Felix since I knew them and trusted them. While I was in the middle of Simon Says, Sean left me to finish his tasks and when I was done Corpse was in the room. I got nervous and stood there, my little character looking at his. He stepped forward so our little eyes were touching, and then I saw the kill animation pop up.
I gasped loudly, laughing as he ran away and I was now a ghost. I sighed, doing more tasks until I was found. Charlie reported my body, and the meeting started. “All right, who killed my cousin?” Sean asked jokingly angry. Everyone mumbled their innocence, and Corpse finally spoke up.
“Charlie probably self reported it.”
“Oh my god, not again,” Charlie groaned, chuckling. “What tasks did you do this round, Corpse?”
“Uh… My memory sucks,” he said. “I went up to admin table, I did trash, I fixed the lights.” He trailed off before piping up again. “Where was Rae?”
“I was in weapons. Where’s the body?”
“Reactor,” Charlie said. “We can skip this round, but I’m super sus of Corpse, just saying.” They all skipped, and I went back to my tasks. Card swipe first try, yeah baby. I saw Corpse walking down toward shields, and I followed him until he made it to electrical. The lights were out, and I knew he was going to wait for someone to fix the lights. Poor Poki was the first to the scene, and he murdered her and vented to med bay. 
Rae reported her body and the meeting got called. “Who was where? Corpse where were you?”
“I was doing med scan and then I was going out toward cams.” 
“Likely story,” Charlie said. “There’s a vent from electrical to med bay, he could have easily killed her and vented.”
“That’s true, but where were you Charlie?” Corpse asked.
“I was in nav, actually.” I wonder who the other imposter is… They kept arguing, and Lily spoke up meekly. 
“Uh, I have some information.” Everyone quieted down. “I saw Felix fake a task.”
“What!” Felix exclaimed. I laughed as he tried to defend himself, but he was lowkey sus. They all agreed to vote him off since Corpse apparently had this power of redirection and they didn’t talk about his suspicious activity again. The round started and the chat bubble popped up.
pEWds: I’m innocent!
Y/N: omg wait who do you think it is
pEWds: I think it’s Lily and Corpse.
Y/N: it’s def Corpse, he MURDERED me right after I finished Simon Says
pEWds: disgraceful
We ghosted around to finish all our tasks so we could follow Lily and Corpse. Corpse was stalking around, faking tasks. One of them sabotaged the O2, and they all made their way over to fix it. Sykkuno was alone on the top O2, and Lily killed him and ran up to weapons to fake that task. Sean reported his body, and they all argued and didn’t vote because there were seven, but they all seemed really sus of Lily. 
The round finally ended, and the crewmates lost because of Corpse. “I cannot believe you killed me first, we just met!” I said.
“I saw the opportunity and I took it, Y/N.” I laughed.
“Sorry Y/N, I should have told you that Corpse is #1 imposter.” Sean laughed.
“You can’t see me right now but I’m pouting.”
We played a few more games, and thankfully I never got imposter. I yawned and stretched my arms up. “Hey guys, I’m gonna go. I’m tired and I have an exam in the morning.”
“Awe, well good luck, I’ll call you later,” Sean said.
“Bye! It was very nice to meet you, Corpse.” He chuckled.
“It was very nice to meet you too, Y/N.” I smiled and clicked off the Discord call and the game, grabbing my phone and plugging it in before hopping into the shower. 
Corpse’s POV
“I think I’m gonna call it a night as well,” I said.
“Oh, so now that Y/N is gone, we aren’t good enough for you?” Sean said. I laughed, shaking my head. 
“Nah, I wanna work on some stuff.” They all said goodbye as I logged out. My Discord was still up and Y/N’s name was staring me in the face. Should I add her? Is that weird? I took a deep breath and pressed the add button before covering the window with something else and working on a video.
Y/N’s POV
I towel dried my hair and threw on a big t-shirt and some shorts. I grabbed my phone as I plopped on my bed. 
Discord
Corpse_Husband sent you a friend request
I caught myself grinning as I unlocked my phone and looked at the request on Discord. I hesitated a little bit before I clicked accept. I sighed, scrolling through Twitter until I got another notification.
Discord
Corpse_Husband: hi there, Y/N
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Let me know if you want a part 2 to this!
1K notes · View notes
sopxhiea · 3 years
Text
Rules
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Alfie Solomons X Friends with Benefits!Reader
Summary: She’s known as a dancer in a high end club but he’s known her for not so long. She decides the rules, he goes along with them but sometimes, he’s the one making the rules.
“If you interrupt me one more time, so help me god.”
“Obviously you have mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit.”
It’s late. 
Late enough to hear the dogs howling in the groggy streets of London as the black sky decorated the horizon. The room was quiet, only the sound of breathing filling the hollow walls of the apartment. The silence wasn’t unusual and it was more than welcomed. The owner wasn’t home, a familiar body was standing in the spacious entrance.
You weren’t home yet.
Feeling the soft material of the lacy undergarment residing around your upper thighs, you looked around to see who was still in the club. It was close to the weekend which meant that it was getting busier than usual. Men were mostly drunk or intoxicated by the movements of the ladies around. There was no one to entertain in the club anymore so you moved towards the interior rooms to get ready to leave.
The space was decorated with mirrors, make up clutter right in front of them as some of the girls packed the last of their garments to leave. The sun would approach soon, sunlight beaming through the groggy city but you hoped to make it home before then. Slowly gathering your stuff and stuffing them all in your bag, you looked at yourself in the mirror.
The club wasn’t the usual, much like you.
It was a place for rich lads, some aristocracy and the kind of men that had to be served in private rooms because of how high they were up in the pyramid scheme. Most of the work you did was talking, some dancing here and there and you were done. Nothing ever got physical since it wasn’t a brothel, but a place for fine entertainment.
The make-up was off, your natural skin color glowing under the countless bulbs that decorated the mirror. The club was mostly empty now, car sounds no longer audible. It was dead silent outside, the hour when the city would be asleep and you’d walk home on your own. It was a treat to say the least.
The cold weather attacked your skin a bit too quickly as you made your way down the street. Your flat wasn’t too far from the club, just perfect distance for a night walk. It was dangerous in the streets, especially for a lady like yourself but you had a gun hidden in your bag and a long needle that held your bun together and you knew your way around both of those tools.
The night seemed quiet as you walked, no sounds of chatter but a few drunken lads from a couple blocks away. You hugged your coat a little tighter and realized that you were less tired than usual.
-----
The inside of the house was quiet, an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach as he looked through the corridor. Your dresses were on the floor, a couple mugs here and there sitting on the piles of books. He saw a nightgown and your knickers on the floor and decided that you had gone to the club a little later than usual. As far as he was concerned, everything was normal.
The sound of keys jiggling outside the door made him turn towards the entrance and before he knew it, you pushed the door open with a gun in your hand that was pointed at him. Your breathing was even and the gun in your hand didn’t shake in the slightest.
He greeted you with a smile.
You lowered the gun down in a swift motion when you realized who it was. He was wearing his usual smile, broad as he walked towards you with dense eyes. He was wearing the usual attire but his prayer shawl was missing and you realized it was past saturday.
There he was, the handsome stranger.
He wasn’t so much of a stranger really, not since he’d made you chant his name until the sun was down and you had to go to work. He knew the way your body responded, what you liked in the bedroom and just how to kiss you to make you beg. 
He didn’t know anything about your family, where you’d spent your childhood or the way you’d silently pray each time you saw a shadow. Alfie didn’t know what meals you cooked, how you liked your tea or anything past your occupation and name and where you lived. 
He didn’t need to. 
And he wasn’t allowed to.
“What the fuck happened to sayin’ ‘ello, pet?” he said with an amused face that you didn’t mirror. You were still a bit tired from work and he never came over afterhours.
Those were the rules.
He was allowed to come anytime before your work and never after you’d just arrived home. He would usually call before and let you know. He wasn’t allowed to buy you things or take you out, even though he’d stayed over a couple times before. You knew limited information and about him and he the same, and he wasn’t allowed to break any of the rules.
“Sorry. I’m just a little..” you spoke with a soft tone and he could hear the tiredness seeping from your limbs as he took a look at you.
You looked tired but beautiful nevertheless.
Your figure was a bit slumped, the kind of tiredness that came from working too hard and not because he was the one tiring you out. You weren’t wearing any make-up or fancy clothes, it was his favorite version of you. He didn’t like all the make-up you had to wear for the club or the fancy lingerie but he had no say in any of the things you did. You had made that painfully clear for him.
“Ya’ alright?” he asked while walking towards you, voice a little concerned at your state but you were a bit too tired to care.
And you wanted to hug him, really badly.
Alfie was very rough around the edges, far too rude at first sight for any lady but it would take a split second to realize that he wasn’t rude at all, that was just the way he was. He brushed shoulders with gangsters, people of the underworld who had to do dirty things to get food on their table. He had blood in his hands and for a man of his kind, he was a gentle one.
You immediately leaned a bit closer when his hand came into contact with your shoulder.
“Fine.” you nodded, little bits of your hair framing your face and Alfie leaned in even closer, standing right in front of you with his hand on your hip.
“Do you want anythi-” you started speaking in a softer voice than normal and Alfie felt himself melt a little but his eyes didn’t leave yours.
“Nah,’m fine, pet.” he said, in a low whisper. He was very gentle at that moment, almost like in a daze.
He had met you in a very unusual way.
You had crashed into him, face on his chest one day when you were out buying groceries. The flowers in your hand were crushed when you bumped into him and he had no time to apologize before you’d started screaming at him for being so careless. He’d listened you shout while thinking about how lovely you were and then asked you out for tea that very same day.
You had said yes and then somehow ended up on his bed. You’d left without saying goodbye but then bumped into him a couple weeks later. He had talked charmingly the whole time and then it happened again, again and then once more before you established some rules so that he didn’t think this was more than a stress relief situation.
“What are you-” you started talking again with his face closer to yours but he interrupted you soon, speaking softly against your irritated face.
“I had a fuckin’ job, right, jus’ around the fuckin’ corner so I figured..” he spoke but trailed off with a smile and you finished it for him.
“So you figured you’d have a quick fuck-” your smile was less evident as you looked at him while speaking.
“A visit, lass. A fuckin’ visit is what ‘m here for, innit.” he said, interrupting you once more and he saw your blood boil which only aroused him.
“If you interrupt me one more time, so help me god.” your voice was stern as you looked up at the man. He was twice your size yet you did all the ordering around.
He didn’t mind.
He had been with his share of women, mostly in brothels but he’d usually leave out that part. He loved women, that was a given but he had never grown fond of one before. You had seem like the polar opposite of him when you’d first met and all that did was to draw him even further. He didn’t like the warmth that spread through his chest when he saw you, it made him feel young and defenseless again.
“Sorry, pet.” he said, face even closer to yours now. You knew what he was here for but it didn’t fit the rules, you had no problem sending him home.
“You came here for what?” you spoke against his lips, not kissing him just yet but simply teasing. He was a sucker for that.
He smiled when your fingers caressed his cheek and your lips almost touched his. He wasn’t here for a fuck this time, he had simply dropped off. He had business around the corner with a butcher’s shop that was causing him some trouble and realized that you’d be home soon.
He also wanted to ask you a question but that would come later.
“To see ya’.” he said, simple as that while your lips ghosted over his. Your eyes were locked into his and he didn’t seem to be lying from the way his face relaxed.
“Hm.” you said, humming before you leaned closer to plan your lips on his.
The kiss was slow, not the usual teeth against teeth you had with him. His hands were on your waist while yours resided on his chest and cheek. He was savoring the moment since this was rare with you, very rare. You wanted some relief on most days and that’s when you’d see him, not when you wanted a hug or a small chat.
But you weren’t complaining in the slightest.
You broke the kiss, a bit hesitant at first while staring at his lips. He was searching for your eyes when you parted but you wouldn’t look with the fear of him catching something in there. You slowly walked away from him, taking your long coat off and throwing it on the sofa. The house was a mess but that was the usual. All you and Alfie did was fuck anyway so the only place he would be concerned with was the bed.
You sat down on the chair in the corner of the room and looked at him, standing near the entrance with his broad form. He was here for something, you could tell but he wasn’t so keen on giving it to you. It wasn’t like you were dying to know but Alfie was not someone who’d usually ask for anything, let alone anything from you.
All he would ask was a fuck and that was the arrangement.
“You’re gonna talk?” you said, watching as he made his way to the corner you were sitting on and sat on the sofa next to you.
He didn’t speak for a while. His hand tugged at his beard while he looked at you, lost in thought. He wasn’t really looking at you but through you, which was unusual considering he was one of the first people to ever see you for who you were. You didn’t like to think about it, he was good in bed and that’s all you were concerned with.
“Ya’ hear what’s goin’ on in these fuckin’ streets?” he asked, head motioning outside for a split second before he directed all his attention to you again.
Your eyebrows furrowed and you spoke, not a care in the world as he looked at you. “Seeing as I arrive home at this hour, no.” you said, eyes searching for his for a second before finding them.
He seemed uneasy.
“There is a fuckin’ war, yeah, a dangerous one, lass and it ain’t gonna look pretty for ya’ when they realize ya’ fuckin’ know me.” he said, measuring each and every word.
You didn’t know why he cared.
In your eyes, you were just a woman he fucked. There were no strings, no seeing each other romantically or any kind of involvement. You weren’t his, not by any means and he wasn’t yours. You’d speak to him if you saw him outside but there was no other involvement other than being with each other for stress relief. For all you knew, he was still making regular visits to the brothel.
But he wasn’t.
He had stopped right after he had first met you. He still had his needs but you were more than capable of taking care of him if he were to knock on your door. He knew the rules, was very well aware of the lines you’d drawn for him but he’d still protect you. Not because you were his fuckbuddy but because he genuinely cared about your wellbeing, even if that wasn’t allowed.
You smiled at him at first, almost felt like he was mocking you. Why did he care? You tilted your head to the side and spoke with an amused voice as he looked at you with concern in his eyes, not something you were used to seeing. He still listened as you spoke. “Obviously you have mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit.”
He shook his head with an amused chuckle. You really had no idea. The Italians didn’t know of you yet but if they followed Alfie enough times, they could easily make out the equation. He looked at your still form for a moment and spoke, saying what he’d been wanting to say since he arrived and you saw the weight being lifted off his shoulders.
“I can fuckin’ protect ya’, pet, if ya’ come live near me, that is.” he said, word by word and he saw your face change.
It was absurd.
“No.” you said, not even taking a minute to think about it as you looked at him. Before he said anything else, you spoke up again with a shaking head. You were still seated, less angry than he’d expect you to be. “I can’t move away from work and I don’t even know how to find another apartment at this time.” you spoke, voicing all your concerns.
He was a gangster and knew the ropes better than you so you opted on trusting him. If it turned out to be a mistake, you would blame it all on him but you didn’t want to get killed because you’d been fucking some bloke. Except that he wasn’t some bloke and he had his own gang.
“I got that figured ou’, I did, yeah.” he spoke to you while leaning back on the sofa. You looked at him with a curious expression. He was amused at it for a second before speaking up again, hand tugging at his beard. “I got ya’ a fuckin’ place of yer own, near where I fuckin’ live, pet...” he said and watched your eyes burn.
Who did he think he was?
The rules were clear and your blood was boiling because this man was breaking every one of them. He wouldn’t care if you were dead, you had thought but the more he spoke, the more you changed your mind. He had already taken care of everything without even asking you and he heard you scoff while his words still filled your ear.
“I’ll have one of the lads to fuckin’ drive you..” he said, done with what he was saying and you snapped back immediately.
“You’ll have someone drive me in the evening and pick me up at 4 in the morning from a gentlemen’s club?” you spoke, eyes stern as they bore into his.
He just nodded.
You scoffed once more and got up, hand on your hip as you paced through the room. He just watched. He could see the questions forming as you looked at him every now and then as you paced. There was a look of panic in your eyes as you walked through the corridors and realized that he was probably right at having you move, you could easily be killed. Even if you weren’t seeing him, it was common for someone to be killed just because they were living in a dangerous area.
“Will they kill me?” you said, and spoke once more before he could answer. “If I don’t move, I mean..... Will I die?” you said, eyes wide with confusion and panic.
So he spoke up almost immediately, not liking your frantic eyes as he was used to seeing your calm features after a good fuck. “I won’t have that fuckin’ happen-”
“But If I refuse to move?” you said, waiting for him to properly answer the question with hand on your hip. He knew you were measuring all the possibilities.
“I ain’t gonna lie to ya’, pet, ‘s very possible, it ‘s.” he said while looking at you. He was still sitting in front of you.
He watched you nod.
This didn’t change anything in your eyes. It wouldn’t mean that you were dependent on him or that he would have any power over you. You’d just be protected and the chances of you getting killed because of him would decrease. You measured it all in your mind and realized that it was probably for the best.
“Fine.”
------
His movements were fast, feral almost as his skin came into contact with yours every other second. The bed creaked, not too loud while your panting filled the room. Hands holding onto him by the shoulders, you let out a shaky exhale when he adjusted the angle. His hair was messy as it fell on his forehead, moving each time he thrusted into you.
“Fuck.” you whispered against his lips when he started moving faster, hand on his back and neck while his remained on your waist.
He groaned against your neck with each movement, holding your legs up on his knees in the process. A thin layer of sweat was apparent on your skin even though it was freezing outside. You watched him lift his head, facial expression covered in bliss while the morning light hit his face.
It had been a week since you’d moved into the apartment and 4 of those days had been spent with you and him testing the new bed. You had gotten a new one for yourself and he’d joked about how you’d have to break into it so that it was comfortable and you had given him one look and there you were, four days later with your legs wrapped around him.
Your back arched off the bed the faster he became and he was soon becoming erratic, gasping for air and you felt your body slowly tense and give in. Your hands dug into his back as he moved, reaching his climax soon after. He stayed like that for a while while you regained your breath, feeling your body grow tired with each passing hour. You swallowed as he slid out of you and collapsed next to you on the bed.
The rules were still in place.
You stared at the ceiling while he stared at you while laying on his stomach next to you. Your hair was messy, the tie no longer holding it together and tangles here and there. He watched your heaving chest, breath a little lost as you locked your lips. 
And then you turned to him.
His eyes had already been on you but you hadn’t realized. He was staring, not gawking but looking with some sort of softness in his gaze. You didn’t smile as you inspected him and the way he was looking at you. You didn’t do the same to him, feeling yourself grow a bit too uneasy at the feeling of being watched.
And if you looked for too long, you were afraid you’d get lost.
Slowly lifting your body off of the mattress and sitting next to him, you came to realize that most of your lower body had gotten sore in between days of tidying and arranging the new flat and Alfie not wasting a second to get you alone so that he could spend the rest of the day tiring you out even further. 
He watched your hair fall across your back when you got up, messy from the events that had just taken place. You were not wearing anything so you grabbed your cardigan and wrapped it around your body when you got up. The whole time, he just watched as you moved around your new space.
It already felt like home.
He’d spent most of the days either helping you out or making sure that the lads didn’t damage any of the furniture or simply making you pant on the bed. It had been wonderful if he was honest, he wasn’t as angry and there was no feeling of uneasiness in his chest. He still saw dangerous man from day to day but knowing that you’d be home before you left for work, telling the lads how to put the sofa made him feel look forward to the time he’d get to see you.
He didn’t think much of it, or so he convinced himself that he didn’t.
“Alfie.” you said, you had been speaking to him but he was in his head so he hadn’t heard.
“Huh, what, luv?” he said, lifting himself off of the mattress and sitting on the soft material instead.
“You want tea?” you said, licking your lips while standing next to the door’s frame with nothing but a cardigan on. 
“Hm.” he said, nodding as he got up to put his pants on. He didn’t dress himself any further even though it was cold outside, he felt warm after laying on the bed with you.
He walked towards the kitchen to see you waiting for the water to boil. You looked at him when he appeared on the door and you gave him a gentle smile which he returned with a warmer heart. He walked next to you while you poured the water in the tea cups and his hand met your hip, squeezing gently.
This was not something you usually did.
In the last week, the lines had become blurred. It was hard to tell what he was to you. He had found you an apartment and had even picked you up in the morning when you were done. You had joked around with him during the ride and he’d even made jokes to make you smile, he had succeeded, too.
You shuddered a little when his lips met the space between your ear. He knew your body like the back of his hand, no matter how much you’d want to deny it. You kept your eyes on the water that was pouring out to the cups but his lips had your attention.
“Alfie, I’m gonna burn myself.” you said, in a breathy voice and he stopped with a smile. You didn’t even see his lips soften but you knew he was smiling.
After putting the tray on the table that resided in the middle of the living room, you sat on the soft chair you had brought from your previous place. He sat on the sofa on the opposite corner while waiting for the tea to cool down. He wanted to say something, it was hanging at the back of his mouth but he couldn’t get the words to come out.
And you so took it upon yourself to make him.
“If you wanna say something, just say it.” you said, almost a whisper but he had heard since the rooms were silent. You wore an annoyed expression that he often saw but it only amused him further.
He wanted to ask you if you’d work today and he already knew the answer.
He didn’t like it, the sticky feeling in his stomach each time you would go to work. He had no say in what you did, either for work or on the daily and he knew that but it only stirred him further. There was the fear of you getting hurt but he knew you were more than capable of taking care of yourself.
And then, there was the other issue that wouldn’t leave his mind.
Other men got to see you in fancy lingerie, things that didn’t cover you up all the way and it made him mad. He didn’t quite know why, just that he was annoyed with the whole thing. He wouldn’t say it but you’d see the relief on his face when you’d be back from work or when he’d come to pick you up. He had been fucking you a little more carefully lately, ever since you’d moved in closer to him. He was almost tender, painfully soft with you when you’d let him show you a good time. It wasn’t the animalistic, rough Alfie you were used to but there was complaint, only curiosity.
He didn’t speak, just hand tugging at his beard and you knew he’d wait until the day was over and you’d be back from work to see him still in the same position. “You’ve been in me, Alfie, I won’t get mad.” you spoke, almost sensing the reason for his hesitation and his eyes locked into yours when you were done speaking. 
He figured he’d trust your word.
“Yer goin’ to work?” he asked and saw your features change.
You knew why he was asking but that didn’t change anything.
You had a vague idea as to why he had been more gentle with you lately, why he kissed you deeper than usual and why he insisted on giving you hickeys even though you’d told him not to on numerous occasions. He was more touchy, almost always around with the excuse of ‘making sure you were settled in’. You were just a girl but you weren’t stupid.
And this wasn’t something you could allow.
Men got jealous, they got protective and thought they had some sort of power over you the moment you’d become ‘ their girl’. You hated that anyway, being someone’s girl and knowing how dangerous Alfie’s line of business could be, you didn’t see sense in pursuing the possibility of anything happening with the man. You shook your head and he watched you lick your lips before you spoke.
“Yes, I am.” you said nonchalantly, as if you were trying to tell him that no matter how much he’d ask, you still wouldn’t want it. “You don’t need to pick me up.” you said, expressionless as he looked at your standing yet somehow small form. You hugged the cardigan tighter as he spoke, he watched you put some things into space. Things he’d knocked out of its place when he had been feverishly kissing you.
“I fuckin’ will, though.” he said, eyes stern as he looked at your face. You were a little taken aback but no evident sign of surprise.
“You don’t have to.” you said again, agitated with his need to make sure you were alright when all you needed him for was a quick fuck.
It didn’t work like this, not with you so you wouldn’t entertain the chance of being with him.
“I want to, lass, yeah, so I fuckin’ will.” he said one last time before getting up to walk towards you.
He would be jealous, you told yourself. He wouldn’t like the fact that other people were able to see you in such little clothing, you thought and he certainly wouldn’t appreciate the little dances you would give. Sure, he was a good fuck but he was also a cruel gangster and the balance seemed almost even.
Almost.
You walked away the moment his breath his your face and made your way to the bedroom to tidy up. There were clothes on the floor and books everywhere, you grabbed one and put it on the shelf and he was right behind you when you turned back.
“Alfie, move.” you said, not able to penetrate through his large form as he blocked your way.
“Tell me.” he said, finger under your chin as he lifted your face so you were looking at him.
“Tell you what?”
“Why?” his voice was a whisper as he looked at your small form, chin still between his fingers as his eyes bored into yours.
Your eyebrows furrowed at the question as he looked at your face, Why what? you thought. The question had so many ways of ending and yet, only one question popped into your mind.
Why were you still going to work? Why, when he was the one keeping your bed warm?
You didn’t answer, you didn’t know if there was an answer. It would not work, he would be a jealous man, jealous of the other ones that got to see you in work and it would get unbearable like it always would with any relationship you had. You didn’t say anything and walked away, he just watched.
He left soon after that, not a word or a forehead kiss like he’d usually give you. He wasn’t hurt or broken by anything, he was just waiting for you to make up your mind. The words had stirred something in you, he had seen that when you had looked at him. He just needed an answer now.
Laying on the bed as you watched the street lights dance on the ceiling, you realized you had the answer.
But it would put you in a lot of danger.
-----
Tagging: @clairecrive  @parkbearum @sourirez  @vetseras​ @mollybegger-blog @babylooneytoonz @peakascum
A/n: Hi!! This was something that had been in drafts for a while now so i wanted to post it at last. I hope you enjoyed it and let me know if you’d like another chapter!!
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Timekeeper's assistants AU
Alright y'all! This is gonna be my info dump post for the Timekeepers assistant Au- buckle up cause it's gonna be a long one!
Inspired by @queendibz post here
The entire purpose of the assistant squad is to keep all the time lines running smoothly- this can range from stopping a world ending event to making sure things misplaced by natural ghost portals get put back into the right time and place.
So First up on the crew list,
Dan:
-Dan definitely isn't a homicidal maniac anymore but he's not 100 percent "redeemed" either.
-I mean he's probably still a bit of sadist but he tries not to be?
-The best description I can give is that he's in recovery, basically.
-So, Clockwork knew that Dan would eventually bust out of the thermos just because it wasn't built to hold a ghost of his power level for a prolonged period of time. But beyond that?? He has no idea about anything in regards to Dan. Since Dan's creation was averted, his timeline doesn't exist anymore. He's a paradox that exists outside of time, and unfortunately, that means he's the one entity in the multiverse that exists in Clockwork's blindspot. There's no way for him to know what Dan's going to do next.
-Anyway, Dan eventually breaks out of the thermos fully intending to Fuck Shit Up, And Clockwork makes a point of informing him that if he leaves the clock tower he will cease to exist. (Like Dan, the tower exists outside of time, so he's safe there.)
-Dan is the first member of the assistant squad. Granted, it took a while for him to come around to the idea of helping Clockwork but he got there eventually.
-Dan is an entity that was born out of the rage and grief of two very broken people and he has so much shit he's working through as a result
-One of the first things he had to do was recognize and accept that he's an entity that's completely separate from Vlad and Danny. He might have all their memories and the weight of their mistakes on his shoulders, and on top of that, the atrocities he himself committed because of them. The first step is realizing that he doesn't have to be defined by the people that made him.
-It's a really fucking difficult thing to do tho and he's got a lot of weird emotions in regards to Vlad, Danny and the Fentons as a result. A near constant identity crisis, self loathing, daddy issues, something that could arguably be called an Oedipus complex, (FUCKING THANKS, VLAD)
-Cannot stand the smell of fast food, it makes him nauseous and the sight of Nasty Burger sauce alone is enough to make him vomit Ectoplasm.
-He's just a hot mess all around y'all
-He tries to keep his interactions with the Danny's as minimal as possible at first bc of this. The first time he meets them in person he shape shifts into Danny like he did in TUE and just pretends to be one of them. Some of them have had interactions with their respective Dan's already and would be super wary of him and probably pretty freaked out otherwise.
-Dan is eventually allowed to leave the clocktower for supervised "Field missions" with the aid of a time medallion to keep him from poofing out of existence, but it takes a while for clockwork to build up that level of trust.
-Dan's shapeshifting ability Actually comes into play a bit on a lot of those missions, since he can Mimic Danny it also makes sense that he'd be able to impersonate Vlad in the same way. Granted he's not incredibly comfortable taking on either of their appearances but it does help him hone his shapeshifting ability to the point where he's able to pick and choose features from both Vlad and Danny and sorta make his own human disguise.
-Most of the time he acts as the eye in the sky from the tower, monitoring for timeline anomalies and then notifying the appropriate member of the assistant squad.
-He has a room under the clock tower that he operates from. I kinda like the idea of there being like, catacombs down there? Anyway he's got all kinds of monitors and view screens and he very rarely leaves. It also doubles as his "living space." He doesn't need to sleep but he's got a big mess of a pillow fort that he crashes in regardless bc sometimes you just NEED to be unconscious for a while. The catacombs are also absolutely full of those little blob ghosts that wander around the zone bc They're attracted to the ecto energy the tower gives off. He's really annoyed by them at first but they grow on him after a while and now he just dotes on them.
-There's a specific throw pillow sized one that likes to hang out in Dan's room a lot and he ended up getting a little over attached to the stupid thing. His name is Dorian. Bc he's a gift.
-SIR THATS MY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT BLOB
-Dan's appearance has changed slightly. He wears his hair loose now and it's kinda just this big fiery mane when it's not contained. His cape is more of a cloak now, it has a hood and he wears it sorta pinned together at the shoulder so the DP logo is covered.
-Dan's relationship with the rest of the Danny's is kinda weird, and a little strained. He has a hard time being around them for very long because, well, he used to sort of be them? Except not really? He does care about them tho, and the last thing he'd want is for one of them to end up like him.
-His relationship with clockwork definitely starts out pretty familial, after he becomes his assistant, anyway. There's room for that to develop into meddling minutes but I'm not entirely sure if I'm gonna go that route yet.
-The Danny's only ever hear his voice for a while before he finally let's them meet him for real, so they end up calling him Charlie for a while as a joke. Cause Ya know. Charlie's angels. Even after Charlie still ends up being his designated name on missions.
Mer! Danny:
-Was recruited bc a lot of the shit that gets sucked through natural portals ends up in a body of water somewhere and when that happens he's on call to retrieve it.
-Is Actually not at all ghostly! Mer Danny's situation is basically the plot of H2O (just add water), or if you haven't seen that, Aquamarine. And by that I mean he's only a merfolk in water.
-He's an electric eel
-His Jack and Maddie are marine biologists, with a particular interest in marine cryptids
-We're taking sea monsters baby!!!
-Not entirely sure how this Danny ended up half mer yet but I'll figure it out, lmao.
-14 years old
-His nickname/ designation is "Moray"
Crown Prince! Danny:
-Nickname/designation is Prince / Princey
-16 years old
-Not allowed to go anywhere in the zone without the Fright knight bc of some ancient ghost law bullshit, so he has a constant babysitter.
-He's next in line bc he sealed away Pariah, but can't take the throne until he is both, A) at least 18 years and B) Completely deceased
-Vlad is his Regent bc he did have a part in the whole sealing the previous king thing, but he's also not completely dead so his power is super limited there.
-As Prince Danny has the crown of fire in his ghost form, although now the name is kinda ironic seeing as it's completely frozen over. It's blue now and it smokes like dry ice.
-As Regent, Vlad has the ring of rage for "safe keeping"
-Vlad and Danny are pretty much constantly at each other's throats, fright knights probably had to shut down more than a few of Vlad's attempts to usurp the crown from Danny through combat.
-Princey deals with the timeline issues that involve the ghost zones' internal / political affairs, and he's gotten very well versed with dealing with the Observants.
Winged! Danny :
-15 years old
-Mallard duck wings
-His Vlad is a swan
-Comes from a family of waterfowl, Jack is a goose, and Maddie is a white swan. Both he and jazz are ducks bc of their grandparents.
-As Fenton his wings are white, like jazz, and as phantom they turn black with a green iridescent sheen.
-He's trans
-Nickname/ designation is inviso Bill. Bc ducks have bills haha get it-
-Ghostly wail?? Nah son he's gotta killer QUACK
-Absolute besties with Mer!Danny/ Moray, sometimes they go swimming together after a mission.
Clone! Danny:
-Physically he's a 12-year-old, but he's only been alive for a few months.
-Alt universe where Vlad manages to stabilize the perfect clone with his own DNA.
-Dani still exists, and the original danny from his time line also rescued the other problematic clones.
-Doesnt like the fact that he's a clone, and very much wants them all DEAD. Bc them running around is a reminder that he's not the real danny.
-Human half looks the same aside from the widows peak and the mallen streak. His ghost half takes after plasmius. Blue skin, and the Hazmat kept it's original white colors.
-Probably has fangs and a forked tounge.
-Not so much a member of the squad as he is someone that they need to be keeping an eye on.
-Does NOT get along with them.
-Dan enjoys making him uncomfortable.
-Designation is Masters / the brat (not to his face tho)
Family Breakfast AU! Danny:
-A BABY
-The boy is a fucking overpowered todler okay. He's an 8 year old.
-The biological son of his Vlad, was born a Halfa. Jack, Vlad and Maddie got their shit together and are in a healthy poly relationship.
-Got separated from Vlad one time in the zone and inadvertently adopted by the assistant squad and clockwork.
-His Vlad is aware of the squad and just. Dad's the crap out of the Danny's as a result. It makes for some..... interesting interactions.
-I can't think of a nickname so I'm just gonna be lazy and say he gets to be the one Tru Danny bc cute little kind privileges lmao.
Full ghost! Danny:
-15 years old, will always look 14.
-Nickname/designation is Toast
-Died in the portal accident and got fucking FRIED.
-He always smells like somethings burning.
-He's really bright and sorta sparks a bit, you can see his bones glowing through the hazmat.
-He still leave the zone to protect his version of amity, but lives with clockwork full time.
Canon Danny (NOT PHANTOM PLANET COMPLIANT) :
-Basically show Danny, except phantom planet never happened fuck you
-Joined the crew after the events of de stabilized
-Also he's trans fuck butch
-Franken! Danny
-Yall remember that Headless Danny Au? This is my take.
-Is Actually 20 years old, but physically stuck at age 14. Bc he's a walking corpse :)
-Came from a timeline that was directly parallel to Full ghost! Danny. He dies in the portal accident, but jack and Maddie are in the lab when it happens and manage to sort of bring him back using a combination of science and freaky ghost junk.
-So he's basically possessing/ stuck inside of his own dead body. Which, is thankfully not rotting or going into rigor mortis bc Ectoplasm is rather similar to formaldehyde, but he's not the most durable thing and bits and pieces fall off from time to time.
-Like his head. For example.
-He's pretty desensitized to it at this point and if he loses a leg after a ghost fight he doesn't see anything wrong with sitting down on the curb of a main street to stich it back on. His being dead isn't exactly a secret.
-Don't ever ask him to "give you a hand" bc he can and will not hesitate to pop one off and Chuck it at you.
-Said hand and any other body part will continue to function just fine even if it isn't attached to anything, btw.
-Nickname/ designation is Adam. Bc. Ya know. that's the name Frankenstein's monster gave itself.
Post Phantom Planet! Danny:
-A very jaded 22 year old who is driven only by spite and enough caffeine to kill a horse
-Very, very tired of the hero thing.
-Being a global celebrity isn't all it's cracked up to be.
-Decided to follow Vlads lead and fuck off to space for a while. Partially to get away from everyone and also partially bc he kinda feels responsible for the fact that the only other person like him and probably floating DEAD in the void somewhere? And yeah Vlad fucked up all on his own but what if he'd tried harder to get through to him things could have been different-
-Joins the crew after a natural portal opens up in space and decides to help out and use clockworks resources to try and track down his Vlad.
-Nickname/ Designation is Polaris, aka the north star.
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superhero--imagines · 3 years
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Part 1 here! / Part 2 Here! / Part 3 Here! / Part 4 Here!
A/N: I can’t always do tags since these parts are long but if you want to be tagged just lmk @thecrazytealady
* Honestly, everything feels so normal
* You’re sitting in the stands of a football stadium as a sea of graduates pass in front of you
* Well it’s mostly normal except for all the stares you get
* “You’ll get used to it” Kate tells you from your right side, you’re not sure when it happened but somehow you’ve become her favorite little member.
* “Sometimes we stare back to mess with them” Irina says from your other side with a teasing grin.
* Irina also seems to really like you, she’s probably you’re favourite
* While everyone else treated you like a child (which in a sense you are), she treated you like an adult
* You hope you can save her if things go exactly like they did in the book
* You’re hoping your close friendship with Edward changes things
* “Oh look there they are now-“
* And right on cue Alice was called first, then Edward
* An entire group of cheers erupt from your section, a few stands above you sits the entire Cullen clan
* Apparently the rest of them have already “graduated”, Alice and Edward are playing a year younger
* You catch him after the ceremony on the -pretty cold- field along with your-
* aunts?
* You’re not really sure what the official family structure is.
* “So what is this, your thirtieth time graduating high school?” You whisper to him after handing him his graduation present
* Some sheet music you know he’s been eyeing and a card that says “you only graduate once”
* You think he’ll appreciate the joke
* “It actually only my sixth” he grins, he so close you can feel a ghost of a breath on your ear
* You notice a couple of boys, adorning similar green graduation gowns staring at you. When you meet their eyes they hastily look away.
* “Hey Edward, what are those guys thinking right now?”
* He follows your line of sight and grins even wider
* “They’re thinking that it suddenly makes sense why I’m not interested in anyone at this school when I’m already dating someone as beautiful as you”
* And if you were anyone else you might have realized how you and Edward look when you’re together to everyone around you
* And it might have been the first sign that things have started to veer of the future you imagine
* But of course you don’t, and you say:
* “Really? You want me to believe two teenage boys used such eloquent language?”
* He laughs
* “I might have picked some.. kinder diction.”
* You both laugh, another private joke that would be referenced for years
* “And where’s my graduation gift?” Alice asks, you hand over a brightly wrapped package, it’s a magic 8 ball and a Chanel scarf, Edward already read Alice’s mind and assured you she would love it.
* “That’s hilarious” she says with a laugh, she hasn’t even opened the package, already seen what’s inside with her gift.
* “Are you coming to our graduation party tonight?” When she notices your confused expression she gives a pointed look to Edward. “You didn’t invite them?”
* Edward rolls his eyes
* “I didn’t think it would be that fun,” he looks to you and explains. “It’s just a party Alice likes to throw to help us fit in better.”
* “It also to commemorate graduating and going to college, which is Infinitely more fun.” She grins, a hand on Edwards shoulder
* He turns his attention to you, his mouth quirked in a lopsided smile
* “Do you want to go?”
* The party scene in Eclipse sure looked fun
* “Sure, sounds like a fun time.”
* It’s decided you’ll drive up with Edward after they all split up, and go to the party with him.
* You’re telling Kate and Irina when they get a look on their face
* “Is that not okay?” You wonder if it’s about Tanya, and how maybe she doesn’t like you spending so much time with Edward.
* “No it’s fine it’s just... will you be alright with all those humans?”
* You had done fine on the stands, but a house party was different, you guess it’s probably easier to eat someone when there are so many dark corners and so many suspects to pick from
* You wrinkle your nose, honestly you don’t get what the big deal is, sure they smell kiiinda nice, but the scent is comparable to one of your deers.
* Also, who knows where these people have been and what they’ve been eating. The thought of eating an alcoholics blood makes you scowl.
* “I think I’ll be fine” Irina laughs, and rests a hand on your shoulder
* “We’ll tell the others, do you want me to bring you a drink later on?”
* You shake your head, you ate a little bit more since you were going to be around so many people today.
* “I should be fine, Edward will probably drive me home, but if not I can always run”
* You always forget you can run faster than a car now.
* “I doubt Edward will refuse the opportunity to spend more time with you.” Irina smirks and you roll your eyes
* You’re both just friends, stuck in family’s where everyone seems to be in a relationship (except for you that is)
* There’s only so much you can take watching Eleazer and Carmen’s pda
* “I’ll see ya later” you excuse yourself to find Edward, who seems to be talking to a group of boys
* “So what’s their deal, are they your cousin or something?”
* “Um... they’re a family friend”
* Looks like Edwards confused about your family structure too
* “They look older are they in college?” Another asks, Edward hesitates, well you are older but you’re not really in school
* “Are you hooking up with them?” Edward winces
* “No we’re not close like that.”
* You decide now is a good time to intervene in the conversation
* “Hey, are you ready to go?” Edward looks relieved to see you
* “I’ll see you guys tonight at Alice’s party” he offers a polite smile before leading you towards his car
* When you’re finally out of earshot, you say
* “You know, I always thought we were the closest of friends” You think he’ll grimace at your teasing but instead he grins.
* “Do you enjoy being the subject of several teenage boys imaginations?”
* “I mean, it’s not-not a little bit flattering.”
* On the drive back to his house Edward takes you through town and points out every mundane landmark like you’re on a safari tour
* “And that is the grocery store I never visit, and next to it is the diner I had to pretend to eat food at during my mandatory “senior breakfast””
* “So what you’re saying is, this is the worlds’ most boring town.”
* “I would say boring adjacent, the town we’ll move to next doesn’t even have a major grocery store”
* He’s definitely talking about Forks.
* You must have killed quite a bit of time with your impromptu tour because when you get to the party it’s in full swing
* You and Edward stand in a corner and play your favorite game
* “Blonde girl in the corner.” He says
* Edward picks someone, and you have to guess what they’re thinking. You’re never right but it’s still funny
* “Hmmmm I’m going to say she’s thinking... ‘This is what all the hype was about? Can’t believe I’m wasting my Saturday night HERE.’”
* He laughs and shakes his head
* “She’s actually thinking about how the object of her affections hasn’t noticed her once, and has been spending all his time with someone else instead.”
* You totally miss the meaningful look Edward gives you.
* You make a face, unrequited love was the worst
* “Well that sucks, I wish there was some way we could help.” Edward only shrugs
* “They’re human problems, for us even if the person we love doesn’t love us back, we just wait a a decade or so, and they usually change their mind.” He grabs your untouched red solo cup
* “I’ll go get us some more drinks.” For a second you wonder if maybe Vampires can drink alcohol, but then you immediately deflate.
* Oh right, the human act, you almost forgot.
* You’re standing by yourself when the “unrequited love” girl from before approaches you, another girl with hair the color of caramel in tow
* “Hey, I haven’t seen you around before, do you got to our school?”
* Any person could see this was a hostile encounter
* anyone except you that is
* “Nah, I’m taking a gap year right now.”
* “Oh?” Miss. Unrequited lights up at that. “Didn’t get into your first choice school?”
* “No my parents died.” You say it causally, but they both freeze at that. So much has happened, colleges and your parents are the last thing in your mind. You notice the reaction though “It’s been a while though, so everything’s fine now”
* You give your best smile and the girl in front of you seemed flustered
* “How do you know Edward?” Miss. Caramel asks, while her friend takes a long sip from her cup.
* “Well- I guess he’s a family friend, but really I met him through Carlisle.”
* “Through Carlisle?
* “Dr. Cullen,” you quickly supply, to them he’s just the local handsome doctor. Not exactly someone who they’re on a first name basis with. “Yeah, Carlisle talked about Edward a lot when I was in the hospital.”
* Before you can scar either of these girls further, Rosalie appears by your side
* “Hey! Glad to see you made it!” She gives you a side hug and turns her amber eyes to the girls in front of you. “Amber, Bethany glad to see you. What are you guys talking about?”
* Both of the girls fall speechless in front of her, probably from her beauty you guess.
* You still get the urge to shield your eyes when you look at Rosalie.
* “Edward.” Rosalie rolls her eyes
* “Of course, the most perfect man alive.” You snort at that.
* “Perfect my ass, I saw him snort drinking yesterday and he sprayed the whole counter top.” Rosalie raises a well groomed eyebrow
* “Really?” A smiles tugging on her lips
* “That’s not even the worst part, do you know he took 43 minutes to clean it up.”
* Rosalie laughs, and the other two look at you with awe.
* “Edward Cullen snorts?” The caramel Coloured hair one, Bethany asks.
* “To be fair I did say a pretty good joke”
* “What was the joke?” Amber asks, and you grin.
* “What did the vampire say to the girl?” They look at each other and shrug
* “What”
* “See you next month” The two girls don’t seem to think it’s good, but Rosalie is dying of laughter
* “He must have hated that!”
* “Oh I’m sure he did, that’s why I said it” Rosalie laughs even harder
* By the time Edward comes back, it’s basically just a two way conversation with you and Rosalie roasting the ever loving crap out of Edward, with two humans eagerly watching
* “One time while we were eating Edward just kept complaining about how “existence is agony and how none of us have a soul” like dude, we’re eating, could you just chill for a second please?” Rosalie says and you laugh
* “I have the perfect Edward impression” you clear your throat and set your face to the best “I’m constipated and existence is agony” face you can manage “I’m an outsider. No one can understand me. No one has thoughts like I do. Existence is agony”
* if Rosalie could die she would have died of laughter, she’s hunched over and every time you think she’ll stop laughing she starts another wave.
* “To be fair, I don’t think anyone has thoughts like mine” You turn to see Edward behind you, he’s actually got an amused smile as he hands you a red solo cup.
* “It’s Henrietta,” he whispers in your ear. “ I figured all the laughing might have made you thirsty”
* “For an outsider like yourself, that’s awfully kind of you.”
* The laughing did make you thirsty, it also explains what took him so long. You wonder if he ran all the way to your house to get you a drink.
* Rosalie doesn’t say anything just grins as she watches you two, Edward’s eyes flick from you to her, and you wonder what he’s experiencing right now
* You’re not going to lie, his narrative of mind reading was your favourite part of midnight sun
* “Do you want to dance?” Well that question came out of nowhere.
* “Sure”
* Queue you and Edward awkwardly waltzing on the makeshift dance floor
* “Who taught you how to waltz?” Edward asks as you step on his feet yet again, you’re glad he’s a vampire and can’t feel pain.
* “You. Right now. I’m learning from the school of life experience.” You grin and he rolls his eyes
* “Here,” he picks you up, and places your feet on top of his. “Better?” You nod and laugh
* “They’re kind of cute right?” Rosalie says to Amber and Bethany, a twinkle in her eyes. Amber sighs.
* “Yeah they are.”
* Rosalie feels kind of bad. She didn’t mean to rub it in her face, but she doesn’t like anyone being mean to you. She already kinda liked you from The game night , and after tonight she REALLY likes you. It’s nice to have someone else on the “roast Edward squad”
* “Oh look, it’s Bradley from the swim team, should we go over and say hi?” Bradly was definitely single, and Rosalie loves playing matchmaker “Sure”
* Edward drives you home at the chaste time of 11:30
* “Did you have a good time tonight?” He asks, walking you to the front door. Ever the gentleman.
* It’s not like a thing alive could hurt you anymore.
* “Yeah it was really fun!” He let’s out a sigh of relief and a nervous smile.
* “That’s good, you’ve been seeming kind of... off lately so I was worried”
* Ah, so he had noticed. You had been feeling off lately. Only four more years with him at most until he moved somewhere far away.
* “Yeah, I’m just a little jealous I guess.”
* “Jealous of what?” His eyebrows thread together. And you sigh.
* “You get to go to college and I can’t.”
* You really are jealous about that, While you’re stuck in the house, Edward will get to move forward and make all sorts of relationships and memories
* His mouth purses, and you feel bad. You shouldn’t have said anything, there’s nothing he can do about it after all.
* “Ah, don’t worry about it, I’m just glad to be here with people who care about me.” That only makes him frown more. But he offers you a small smile.
* “I’ll see you tomorrow.” He says and then he does something really unexpected:
* He kisses your forehead, before retreating back to his car. You watch his car wind away down the circle driveway from the porch. A hand on your forehead where his lips touched and a flutter in your heart.
* Man, Edward was so unintentionally smooth, no wonder Tanya was still hung up over him
* Wait, was Tanya still hung up over him?
* Somehow you found her behavior not consistent with someone with unreciprocated feelings
* The days pass on by, Edward’s around more now because it’s summer break.
* Likewise trips to the Cullen residence are also more frequent because it’s summer break
* You oddly enough spend a lot of time with Rosalie, you mostly roast Edward but occasionally you reminisce about human stuff
* “What do you miss the most?” She asks and you think for a minute
* “Probably Italian food, maybe alcohol” She let’s out a moan
* “Oh my god, how good does mushroom ravioli in a creamy Marsala sauce sound?”
* “Good enough to kill for”
* By extension you also get close to Emmett, but in a totally different way
* “Alright hit me with everything you’ve got!”
* “Uh are you sure about this Emmett?”
* You’re both in a clearing about thirty feet apart
* “Yeah, just show me what you’re made of” He giving you a wicked grin, no doubt glad to have someone new to spar with.
* You shrug, he is asking for it
* He doesn’t even make it a foot forward before he crumples to the ground. You’ve been holding back so long, it almost feels good to not have to contain all your body’s grief
* You reel it back in when he taps out. You expect him to look at you like you’re a monster but he just grins
* “You’re really something else kid”
* You even get close to Esme who assists you in drawing up a schematic for a barn, and Jasper helps you build it.
* “I think the door should go here” he tells you
* “But then it would be facing the fence and that doesn’t seem right”
* He scratches his head and you stare at the architect sketch in your hands
* “It’s supposed to be right here” Alice tells you, already searching through the future for the correct placement.
* And of course you and Edward continue your piano cat and mouse game, where you each start a piece and wait for the other to catch up to your playing.
* Maybe it’s because things are going so well that you can’t help but wonder what went wrong with Tanya and Edward
* So one night, when you’re sitting together in the library, you ask her
* “Tanya why do you hate Edward” She sputters
* “I don’t hate him!” You raise a skeptical eyebrow and she sighs “it’s just- it’s embarrassing !”
* She tells you about how Carlisle had told her about his son, and how he was the last to be without a mate, and was very depressed
* “I thought of it like I was doing a service you know, we would date for some time and have a brighter perspective on this life.”
* You can already guess how this story ends, but you ask “So what happened?” She huffs
* “Well he flat out rejected me, told me I wasn’t his type, can you believe that? A forever 17 year old telling ME I’m not his type.”
* Yeah for a woman like Tanya who was every man’s ultimate fantasy that does seem pretty mortifying
* “Is it-“ you meet her eyes “is it okay that I’m friends with him then?”
* Her eyes soften and she beckons you into a hug
* “Of course it is little one,” she kisses the top of your head “and if it ever happens to grow into more than that that’s okay too.” You wrinkle your nose
* “I wouldn’t bet on that Tanya.” She rubs your shoulder
* “Well you never know, and if that happens, and for some reason he’s lost his mind at tells you you’re not his type don’t take it personally, there’s something seriously wrong with that boy.” You laugh
* The days pass by in a blur.
* Edward starts college studying veterinary science, and every day he comes back and teaches you what he learned
* “Sometimes I feel like I’m getting more out of this than you” he tells you as you do his homework
* “It be like that sometimes”
* You start experimenting with other animals blood, mostly chickens, ducks, and geese.
* You also have a moose now so that’s cool
* After many faithful years Henrietta passes away. You stayed in the barn with her all night, and planted a pine tree over grave.
* “All things die in the end huh?” You whisper as you stand over the first deer you befriended, and Eleazer rubs your shoulder
* “Not us” he whispers
* “Not us” you repeat
* You and Edward are lying next to each other in your bed, both of you pretending to sleep
* “What was it like when you turned?” Edward’s the one break the silence. He always is when you do your dreaming sessions
* “It was... nice” it really was, the venom was warm like a blanket, lulling you into a peaceful last sleep. This surprises him.
* “Are you some kind of masochist?”
* “Well what was it like for you?” You roll your eyes. He goes on a long descriptive tangent, but in short: it was absolute agony.
* “Well that’s weird, I wonder if Alec had some kind of special venom or something.” He flinched at the mention of Alec but doesn’t say anything else.
* The days pass on, just as they always have, but something starts to feel off. Both in your household and in the Cullen’s house. Some sort of tension
* You think about asking Edward or Eleazer about it, but decide against it.
* Maybe you’re just being paranoid
* One day you’re getting blood from the kitchen, when you notice the entire coven is sitting on the kitchen table
* Weird, but maybe they do this all the time and you just never noticed.
* “(Y/N) can you come here for a moment?”
* Well crap
* They all ramble over each other for a few minutes, and you only catch bits and pieces of what they’re saying
* “Everyone here loves you-“
* “It won’t be forever-“
* “Carlisle might even get you a blood bag or two-“
* “Enough!” Tanya roars and immediately the others fall silent, she looks at you with warm eyes and a kind smile
* “(Y/N), the Cullen’s are leaving,” ah, so it’s already time for them to go, Tanya explains how the Cullen’s move around more often than your coven does, on account of Carlisle’s job. Well you knew this was coming. It was nice while it lasted
* “-And that’s why we think you should go with them”
* Wait what.
* “You want me to leave?”
* “No of course not!” Irina shouts, wide eyed, she’s sitting the closest to you. “It’s just-“
* “We see the way you look at Edward,” Eleazer says. Oh not this again, how many times do you have to say it. YOU BOTH ARE JUST FRIENDS.
* “Like you want what he has.” He finishes
* Oh
* “We’re too late in the cycle to send you to school, Irina and Kate have already gone, and it will be another ten years before we decide to move.” Carmen says, her teeth digging into the flesh of her lip. “A lot of things could happen in ten years,”
* The Volturi could want you back on ten years
* “so we think you should go with the Cullen’s and get an education and have a normal life-“
* “Normal-adjacent,” Kate interjects, because life was never going to be completely normal for you ever again. Carmen grins,
* “Normal-adjacent life, you’ll get to have friends, and you could study whatever you want, you don’t have to learn secondhand from Edward.”
* “And you can come back whenever you want!” Kate reassures. “If you decide you don’t like it, and that it’s not what you want, you can always come back, we’ll be right here.”
* They all stumble over each other to reassure you that it’s your choice, and if you decide to stay that’s fine too. But there’s only one question on your mind
* “Do the Cullen’s already know about this?” The table falls silent.
* “Yes, they do.” Tanya says
* “And what do they think about the arrangement?” All eyes trail to Eleazer, so he was the go between for your Covens
* “I think they’re all pretty excited, Carlisle wanted you from the start.”
* Carmen sucks her teeth and lightly slaps him on the arm. “What it’s true, you know Esme’s been cross with him ever since she met them, she wants you too.”
* They’re all looking to you waiting for an answer. You’re not sure what the right thing to do is.
* You’re not stupid, you know things have changed from the original story line, you know the Volturi isn’t going to want Bella as much now that they have you.
* But still... you do want an education, a chance to do everything the way you always imagined
* You also kind of want to see Edward and Bella’s love story play out. Especially now that he’s your friend
* Also you think you should really deter him from watching her sleep, that crap was creepy as hell
* You sigh, there’s really only one choice
* “I’ll go with the Cullens’.”
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renchinworld · 3 years
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THE BLIZZARD IN JILIN
Renjun x fem reader 
fluff & angst // word count: 3.2k
This is the story of Renjun’s childhood friend who he left in Jilin when he followed his dreams of becoming an idol.
Now six years have passed, dozens of awards, hundreds of thousands of fans, and a triple million selling album later... he comes back home to see her engaged to another man. 
A blizzard is coming to Jilin and it’s the strongest one China has ever seen. 
___ ___ ___ 
 “I passed the auditions!” Renjun hugged you tightly, shaking you from side to side in joy. “I’m going to Korea!”
“Congratulations.” You smile, tears forming at the sides of your eyes.
Renjun’s dream has always been to be an idol, but your dream was always him. To be with him. 
For him to spill out the words that his eyes never fail to say everytime you catch him staring at you. 
For him to realize that maybe he didn’t give you his coat on cold winter mornings when yours did not make you feel warm enough just because he thought of you as a friend.
For him to tell you that what he truly wants is to just be an ordinary man in Jilin, grow old with you, chill with each other in the warm fireplace as you look back on your lives in old age.  
To leave it all behind and choose you.
But that would be selfish. That would leave Renjun always wondering with what ifs. He would be with you but his heart would be stuck with a dream he never got to achieve. Like an empty vessel of a person you once loved. You can’t bring yourself to do that to him just to make him stay. 
You love him so much to cut off his wings when he wants so badly to fly. 
“Shouldn’t you go home and pack?” You ask with a forced smile. You’re on the verge of crying in front of him. He needs to go before he sees your tears.
“Right!” He jumps. “By the way, you’re the first one I told. I’m gonna prank my family and tell them I didn’t get accepted first hehe. Serves them right for trying to stop me from going.” 
“You meanie.” You chuckled and he smiled. 
“Come on. You know I love them and it’s just for light fun,” Renjun ruffles your hair and you almost tell him not to leave you then. You bite your lower lip to stop yourself and his eyes land on your lips before he clears his throat. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
You’re always the first one he told everything to. That was your place in his life. But now, seeing him walking away from you, you realize he no longer belongs only to you and you to him. 
He will be loved by a thousand screaming fans and he will perform for them in return.  He will end your calls at night earlier than usual because he has to meet other girls and boys in the morning for a fansign event. He will eventually stop messaging you as he becomes busy and you’ll wonder if he forgot about you completely.
Renjun will get his wish while you can only dream of yours. 
He will be shining as always. Under the bright, blinding spotlights and the glowing eyes of his many supporters. While you will be at your hometown, staring out at the snowy mountains, reminiscing the days when he looked at you the same way his fans look at him now.
Then you will wake up one day and realize that maybe this is bearable enough. 
Maybe it’s okay to continue on, knowing that in this short life you met the one you’d choose in a hundred lifetimes, but he couldn’t choose you in this one. 
Maybe you’ll finally agree to that arranged marriage your parents have been trying to set you up to. 
And maybe you will change your dream to an actual goal instead of a person who will end up leaving you. Maybe, just maybe… you will forget about Renjun too.
And that’s exactly what you did. Or so you thought.
___
5 YEARS LATER
“Honey, remind your fiancé that we’re having his family over for dinner,” your mom says, poking her head out of the kitchen. “Call him, okay?”
You nodded and proceeded to just text Hendery. This arranged marriage isn’t out of love and you both know it. He’s in love with someone else and you’re not willing to give your heart to him. There’s no reason to call each other over things you can just text.
“He says they’re coming.” You said, walking towards the kitchen and making yourself green tea by settling it over ice and waiting for it to melt. Someone you once loved told you this is the best way to make them.
“You didn’t call him?” Your mother asks, concerned. You shrugged. “He’s a nice boy, sweetheart. You’ve been engaged for years and yet you still--”
“Mom, please,” your smile never reached your eyes. “We’ll be fine.”
“Is it because of Renjun?”
You gulped. The mention of his name felt like the cold air that hits you when you step out of the house. It felt like beautiful smiles fading into the background. Like a thousand dreams that were thrown into the fire but the ashes keep on coming back, smothering you and making it difficult to breathe.
“No.” You said almost immediately. 
“I heard he’s back home, taking a short vacation.” She presses on, concern plastered on her face as she studies your expression. “Have you talked to him yet?”
“He’s probably forgotten about me.” Your heart was clawing at you from the inside. “Let’s stop talking about him, mom. Do you need help?”
“No, honey. I’m almost finished. You should just get ready.” She pats your back and goes back to cooking dinner. 
___
Finished with making yourself look presentable, you went down stairs. 
You stopped halfway when the doorbell rang.
No one rings your house doorbell. Hendery texts you whenever he’s in front of your house. Your father just goes in when he comes home from work every month. 
Only delivery men use that contraption. But it’s night time right now. What delivery company would be on duty at 8 in the evening?
“Sweetheart, open the door for me, okay? I’m setting up the table.” Your mom called out from the dining area. 
Something feels off. What if it’s a murderer? Nah, you’ve been watching too many true crime documentaries.
You looked at the peephole just to be sure. 
You wished it was a murderer instead. 
That would’ve been better for your health than Huang Renjun carrying a bouquet of flowers in front of your doorstep.
“What happened?” Your mom walks towards you. You look back at her, the color in your face gone. “Why aren’t you opening the door?”
She grabs the doorknob but you stop her, shaking your head. You hissed. “Don’t!”
Your mother’s eyebrows furrowed. She peeks in the peephole and sighs before she uses her strength on you and forces the door open despite your struggling.
“Oh look, it’s Jilin’s superstar! Welcome back!” She smiles, genuinely happy to see the boy who made your entire province proud. Asian parents amirite. “Come in, come in. Just in time for dinner.”
“Thank you for your hospitality.” Renjun says as he steps in and pays his respects. His voice was deeper than you last remembered. He was taller, more regal looking and even more handsome. How is that even possible?
Your eyes meet and a million memories flood through your mind. Him hugging you, telling you that he’ll be back soon. Not soon enough. You crying every night until one day you just stopped because you became numb. Not numb enough. Him saying goodbye on the phone one last time before he ghosts you. You cursing him on the top of your lungs and crying in the middle of a storm, wanting to just sink into the snow and freeze outside for years to come.
“Hi,” he says and hands you the flowers. Your eyes flutter, your hands are shaking as you receive it. You don’t know if you should be angry or what. “How are you?”
How are you? You chuckled bitterly. “Great, thanks for asking.”
“Hang his coat, honey. I’ll be in the dining area if you need me.” Your mom says quickly to mask the contempt in your voice and leaves the both of you. If your mother noticed anything, she pretended not to notice. The tension was so thick, it probably suffocated her.
“Won’t you ask me how I’ve been?” He smiles and your throat constricts. You don’t say anything so he sucks a deep breath, continuing. “We’re triple million seller idols now.”
“C-congrats.” You say, forcing yourself to not say more because if you do, you might say things you'll regret. You place the flowers down and he hands you his coat for you to hang. A whiff of his perfume passes. He smells like how a cozy and warm morning would be if it was a scent.
“I’ve missed you. I’m sorry for not reaching out--” You didn’t have enough time to process what he said because your phone suddenly rang in your pocket. He nods, eyes never leaving yours. “Go ahead. Must be an emergency.”
It was Hendery. You picked up. He only calls when it’s really important.
“Yes, Hendery?” Renjun's expression darkens at the mention of Hendery’s name. “A blizzard? Okay, I understand.”
You walk past Renjun and went to the dining area where your mother is. “They can’t come, mom. Can’t drive because the blizzard suddenly worsened.” 
“Oh no,” she pouts, then her expression changes when he sees the man standing behind you. “No worries, we have a guest to help us finish the meal. Don’t we, Renjun?”
“Of course, it’s an honor.” His honey voice from behind surprised you. You didn’t know he followed you. “Careful.”
He caught you in his arms when you almost tripped. You were quick to stand up and remove his hold on you. Your mother just stared amused. You were always too composed and collected, but Renjun brings out a clumsy side to you she’s never seen before.
“It’s a shame her fiancé couldn’t meet her childhood friend.” Your mother sighed when all three of you were seated. You and Renjun sat across from each other while your mom was beside you. “The blizzard really did it this time.”
“Fiancé?” His brows knitted, mouth hanging open, waiting for your mom to say he heard it wrong. 
“Hendery.” You said, not looking at him while taking a bite of the steak. “We’ve been engaged since 2018.” Since you stopped talking to me.
“Ah, of course,” he takes a bite out of his food but his eyes are still glued on you. “Congratulations.”
“They’re to be married next month. So exciting!” Your mom exclaims beside you and brings more food to your plates. “Eat up, babies. You both grew up so fast. You’ll probably have babies of your own soon!”
You cleared your throat, feeling the heat on your face. You probably looked so red right now.
“But…  next month?” He asks again, this time not bothering to cover his distaste of the marriage topic. “Isn’t that too soon?”
You said nothing. Why does he care anyways?
Your mom explains for you that Hendery’s parents have been trying to get you both married since last year but you keep on saying you’re still too young. 
“Right!” Renjun extends a hand to prove his point. “What if she changes her mind?”
He looks at you, trying so hard to steal your glance from the food. You give in and look at him. You almost gasp. This is the first time you’ve ever seen Renjun look this desperate. Not when his parents told him not to go to that audition. Not when he talks about becoming an idol. This was much more intense. Like he was about to do unspeakable things to you if you don’t answer him right now.
“I-I don’t think I’ll change my mind.” You finally say, feeling the heaviness in your chest spread through your body, tingling at the end of your fingers. 
“Of course you won’t.” Renjun leans, shoulders rolling back as he adjusts his posture. He says nothing to you throughout the whole meal. He smiles and humors your mother when she shares more stories but he has never looked at you again.
___
“It’s dangerous for you to leave now,” your mom says, worried. Renjun insisted on going home because their house was within walking distance, but the air was blowing outside at terrifying speeds. “Just stay the night like you always do when you were kids, hmm?”
But we’re not kids anymore. Now, we’re young adults who are totally frustrated with each other. That’s not a good idea. But going outside is evidently much worse.
“You can use her brother’s room.” Your mom laughs from the living room where they both are. Your brother Lucas has rarely visited since he married. “You’ve always been like a son to us anyways, even her brother gets jealous of you sometimes.”
Renjun laughs with her, remembering the good ol’ days. You roll your eyes. 
“Thank you so much. I’ll behave, I promise.”
Your mom turns to look at you. You’re washing the dishes in the kitchen. “She’s always insisting to hand wash instead of using the dishwasher. I taught her well.”
“I’ll help her. Please get some rest.” He smiles warmly at her and walks towards you. You both hear your mother go up the stairs, leaving you and Renjun alone again.
“Next month, really?” He asks, grabbing the plate from your hand.
“We’ve already talked about this over dinner.” You sigh. “Just drop it.”
“Are you even sure you want to marry him? Don’t you like someone else?” His tone carried a meaning behind it. Like he knew. 
What does he even know?!
"I'm marrying him and that's final." You say sternly, your patience drying up. “That would make me happy.”
“Since when did you start lying to yourself?”
The ticking bomb within you explodes. Years of sadness turned into rage and it filled your heaving chest. Your eyes started to water. Renjun settled the plate down when he saw your expression and faced you, apologizing immediately.
“Please don’t marry him.” He suddenly pleads as he kneels down, touching your hands and looking up at you. “Come back to me. Please.”
“What? Why are you so--” you stop to breathe out loudly. Tears began spilling and your heart felt like jumping out. You wanted to shout in his face. Why do you care?! Why are you begging?! What are we?!
But only a fountain of tears followed. Years of practicing what you would say if something like this happened just blurred in your mind. No amount of practice will suffice once your first love comes back and tells you something like this. None.
“I’m so sorry,” Renjun stood up and wiped your tears away. His eyes also started to become teary. “I know I’m not in the position to tell you that but I still did. I also know I’m way too late, but I just want to tell you that I love you. I really, really love you. I tried to forget my feelings because I know it would be difficult for you to end up with someone like me, but I just can’t get you out of my head.
“Every time my group members asked me if I liked someone, I would say no but in the back of my mind all I see is you. Whenever someone sings your favorite song, I would remember how beautiful you looked when we sang it together. Every moment I go up on stage, I always wondered if you’re watching me from somewhere in the crowd. Every winter when it snowed in Seoul, I would think of how the snowflakes fell softly on your hair here in Jilin. I may have left, but my heart stayed with you.
“I’m sorry I stopped talking to you. I knew you liked me back so I thought it would be selfish of me to let you wait for so long because of the path I chose. You didn’t stop me from following my dreams back then despite that. So I thought to myself, ‘she sacrificed for me, but I can’t do the same for her?’ and I decided that I needed to let you go. You deserved to be happy, too.
"I stopped reaching out so you could forget me and finally be happy in someone else’s arms. I was ready to let you go. But when I heard you were getting married next month, I couldn’t bear it. I can’t imagine it. I’d rather die. I’d rather give up on everything than see you walk down the aisle for another man--”
His voice cracks. Head drooping down into yours as he hugs you tightly. As if he let you go now, he would lose you completely. As if he doesn’t squeeze you like this, you will end up continuing with the marriage. 
You looked up at the ceiling, tears flowing and mouth hanging open from his words. Isn’t life funny? For years you were scrambling for answers and in just a mere minute, everything has started coming together.
“Renjun...” You say, your voice low and shaky. “I can’t breathe.”
He loosens his hold on you and looks you in the eyes. His hands cupped your face. “Did you hear me? I said I love you. I said I really, really, really love you.”
“I heard, dumbass.” You cough up a small laugh, the tears won’t stop falling. “I love you too.”
He sighs, relief washing over his face. “Marry me instead?”
“Dude, don’t you think you’re going too fast?” You say, your hands planted on his chest. Eyes puffy. Renjun only found it cute. 
“The last time I stalled, I almost lost you. So I’m going all-in now.” 
“You’re a kpop idol. What am I supposed to do if you're on tour and I need to give birth, hmm?”
"Don't you think you're moving faster than me? I'm just at the marriage part and you're already at pregnancy." He chuckles. "Then again, maybe we can rearrange the order of things…" 
You smacked him on the chest lightly. Who knew he could make dirty jokes like this now?
"You told my mom you would behave."
"Your mom likes me and wants grandchildren. I don't think she'd mind." 
"Shut up." You say with a smile and he kisses you. You didn’t expect him to come in stronger than a blizzard and break down all your defenses. His kiss. His truth. His love for you. Him.
There’s still a lot to be done before you two can be free to love each other without worries. But it doesn’t matter. No matter how challenging it is from here on out, you two will have each other and that's all you need. It would be like this. Always. 
Renjun's kiss deepens and he smiles victoriously as you melt into his arms. A dozen awards and a ton of trophies he received, but none of those comes close to winning your heart.
___
From upstairs, your mom smiles to herself. She heard everything when she went to ask what's taking so long but backed away quietly when she heard you both crying.
"I knew these kids just needed a little push. Oh, oof. We have to cancel that engagement…."
___ ___ ___
a/n: Dude I loved writing this so much I actually didn’t want it to end lmao
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hotwings0203 · 3 years
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This is so utterly stupid but I have a few HC’s about Muslim Dabi(again obv this isn’t canon I just think it’s funny)
-Dabi would def be the type of Muslim dude who claims to be super religious cuz he never eats pork and “goes to the mosque to pray”(which is actually just code for hitting a blunt in the back of the parking lot w Hawks and Shigaraki💀), but yet smokes^^ and still has hella sex with like every other girl who bats her lashes at him from across the dining hall
-he also is a big cat lover, he claims since the Prophet Muhammad had cats of his own it’s sunnah to keep one
-on Eid namaz he’s the most dripped out one at the session, I’m talking black kurta dress, nice ass watch, slicked back hair...but funny enough, no one has actually seen him in line for the prayers themselves
-if he were back at home with the rest of the Todoroki’s, he’d most definitely be THE MOST spoiled one. Fuyumi would get on his ass for not cleaning the dishes, but he’d wave her off and tell her it’s training for her to be a better housewife for her future husband(cue a soapy sponge thrown at his head)
-Snitches.Constantly. Bro like this dude catches Shoto on his phone when he’s supposed to be doing a dua? Boom, instant callout followed by a long ass lecture about how he’s straying away from his religion and how he’s going to hell just because he spent one measly moment on his device instead of praising da lord
-Hes also always telling fuyumi to cover up her sleeves that come just a bittt before her wrists, claiming that she’s showing too much skin(especially when Hawks is over, that fucker’s got his eyes on every single one of his family members). But she’s quick to point out his secret tattoos, piercings, and hair dyes. He just scoffs and pulls the “women were created lesser than men so it’s okay for me to act a fool but not for you” card🙄stg I can’t stand him
-Since he’s the closest to Natsu, he’s always giving Eid money to him the most. The dude will slouch against his favorite brothers’ door, watching him play 2K. “What do you want?” Natsu asks with no real malice, not taking his eyes off the changing screen, furiously clicking away on his controller. “Mom says you gotta iron your clothes, Fuyumi’s doing her own so she can’t do yours as well. Oh, and Eid Mubarak by the way.” Natsu pauses him game and stands to stretch his arms above his head, groaning at the tendons popping in place on his back. “Yeah man, you too-what’s that?” He points to a fat parcel in Touya’s hand. The white-haired boy grins and chucks the bulging package at him, which Natsu catches easily. His eyes widen when he tears open the cream-colored paper envelope and reveals dozens of bills exceeding the usual 5-10$ family limit. “Yo, what-how-thanks Touya!” He sputters, throwing the package on his bed and throwing an arm around his brothers’ back in a man-hug. Touya rolls his eyes and barely suppresses a smile at Natsu’s excitement,(something he’s always wanting to be the source of) pounding his back to let go before he asphyxiates. He lets go and Touya smirks before heading towards the door, calling out over his shoulder, “Oh, and I’d thank Sho-turd as well while you’re singing my praise.” Natsu stops in his tracks and looks suspiciously at the withdrawing slender figure. “Why?”. Touya’s voice is distant as he moves to close and lock his door. “‘Cuz it’s his money after all.”
-The two brothers are always waking up at Sehri the earliest in Ramadhan, just so they can scarf down a majority of the food in the fridge and go to sleep without having to interact with the rest of their family at sunrise. And in the case that their family DOES wake up in time to see them chomping down food made for a WHOLE FAMILY and not just two boys, Touya is quick to grab his keys and jacket and cackle that him and Natsu are going to iHop to eat some more. Natsu ofc is quick to follow pursuit, throwing an apologetic grin towards his parents and other siblings.
-When they’re at the mosque and Enji has somehow bullied him enough to sit the hell down and actually ATTEND the lectures for once, Touya still has one up his sleeve. Planned out strategically, he always simpers to Rei that he wants to donate to the mosque, causing her eyes to water and a handful of cash thrown his way, her voice wobbly as she praises her son for actually taking the foundations of his religion seriously. Unbeknownst to her however, this just means that he’ll take a little bit more than he gives. Hawks will be standing at the front of the hall, bowing his head and using his silver tongue to graciously thank the many men and women who come forth to drop their allowance into the money basket. When he sees his best man approaching, he has to stop the smug grin from reaching his ears, instead slanting his brows and holding the basket out to the now black-haired thief. “Glad to see you’re taking eternal damnation seriously, for once,” Keigo flashes his perky whites and Dabi drops Rei’s money into the donation basket, dipping his hand a little lower for a second. “Glad to see you’re still standing here like some busboy peasant, as usual,” he fires back, the two boys catching each other’s eyes and stifling their cackles as the patched hand withdraws, a copious amount of bills in his hand, more than what he put in.
-100% steals shoes. Usually you hear about older men doing this, but age aint nothin’ but a number to Dabi, baby. “Nice kicks,” he nods to a boy Natsu’s age, noting the blue and black minimalist patterns adorning the shoes. The boy recognizes Dabi as one of the most revered figures at the mosque (and the most featured by adults. Who’d want their kid hanging out with the eldest Todoroki as an influence?) and bobs his head excitedly, spewing out the manufacture and release dates of the shoes. Dabi looks at the fanboy amusedly, continuing to lean against the shoe rack as more people crowd around and start to push the boy inside. “See you later Dabi!” The eccentric kid calls out as he’s pushed into the hall by grumbling uncles. The ravenette snickers fo himself, “Yeah, but you won’t be seeing these shoes anytime soon.”
-A notorious playboy in the community. Uncles glare at him, unable to scold him outright for his shenanigans due to his father’s close presence, and aunties steer their children away from him at dinner parties. Speaking of, Dabi’s at a dinner right now. He’s lighting up a joint in amongst 3 mesmerized girls sitting on the floor in front of him and 2 jealous dudes his age in a locked room, away from all the screaming little kids. “Wow Dabi, doesn’t it burn?” The youngest of the three girls asks him with imploring eyes. He smiles a charming smile down at her and he thinks he sees the other two swoon. “Nah, sweetheart, you get used to it after a little while. Don’t be like me though, keep yourself pure and clean,” he shoots a wink at them and they giggle, faces turning red. The other two boys sitting at the far end of the bed scowl at his successful flirting, but Dabi doesn’t care for any of them, honestly, they’re just target practice. Right as he inhaled the fumes of another puff, a little body throws itself at the door, banging its fists on the wood. “It’s time for food!” They all jump at the intrusion and chuckle as the intruder runs away, containing to scream about food being served. The group gets up to leave and exits through the door, but Dabi takes his time. He wasn’t done with his joint, and he has to waft the smell away anyways when he leaves. He’s opening a window to let out some air when he heads a soft shuffle from behind him. “Shows over guys, go eat-“ but when he turns around, the oldest girl of the three stands before him, fiddling with her hands and looking at the floor. “Um, Dabi? I know you said not to try it out by ourselves so...I was wondering if you could-if you could teach me how...?” She looks at the half-used roll in his hand, and he looks from the blunt to her face. He looks behind her. A closed door. Perfect. Taking a step forwards, he relishes in how she takes a hesitant step back, the breath in her throat catching but she still doesn’t back down. She looks to him like he’s a god, and he feels like one right now. And so he steps closer until she’s backed against the wall, his lids lowered to her wide ones, and he placed a hand next to her head. “Didnt your mom ever tell you not to take things from strangers?” He ghosts by the shell of her ear, and she shivers. “She never told me the strangers would be this hot,” and he has to laugh a bit at her tenacity. He pulls away and flops back on the bed, signaling for her to join him. “Well come one then, I’m hungry, better hurry up before I change my mind.” And 5 shotguns later, Dabi barely wipes off her bright pink lipstick from his face and straightens his kurta along with his hair before bounding down the steps, eager for food. At his command, she comes down a minute after him as to not cause any suspicion, but it doesn’t stop Rei from shooting him a knowing glare from the living room as he piles his plate with food. He shoves a veggie roll in his mouth as he turns to join the boys in the dining area, but his path is blocked by a large woman. “I know you’re up to no good. The children told me what funny smell was coming from the room upstairs, and I know you’re to blame, Touya Todoroki. I respect your mother a lot so I won’t make a scene here-“ he interrupts her, mouth half full with a roll, “-I mean, you already kinda are,-“ but she continues her tirade. “-I don’t think you’re a good influence on these kids, especially your siblings. What self respecting family would be okay with their son acting like a hooligan, having piercings, smelling like weed?” He smirks and swallows before swerving around her. “I don’t know Aunty, why don’t you ask your daughter? She didn’t seem to mind my, ah, influence.”
-When they were all younger, there was a time where End*avor wanted the boys the toughen up a bit and stop messing around so much. He brought the family up to the mountains in a nice cabin, purposefully choosing an area with farms nearby. It was around the time of Eid-e-Adha, so naturally goats and sheep’s were going to be sacrificed for the family feast. Touya already knew what was going on, so Enji left it up to him, a scrawny preteen boy to take over the initiation. Fuyumi wanted to come to the farm too, but Touya glared at her and told her to stay home because “girls are too emotional for this.”(he really did think that, but above all he held a secret soft spot for his only younger sister). Natsu and Touya both started heading down to the field to pick out a goat, and ofc little Shoto wanted to come along to. He begged and begged for his older brothers to bring him along and to not leave him at home for once, and with a sly glance to Natsu, Touya relented. He leaned down to Shoto’s eye-level and asked with serious eyes, “You sure?”. Shoto nodded eagerly, standing straight up as to look more solemn and mature. Natsu held back a snicker and grabbed Shoto by the collar as they dragged him out to the pasture. Oh, the little boy was in heaven among the bleating sheep and fluffy coats. “Go ahead, pick one out!” Touya said eagerly, nodding to the clueless toddler to choose a sacrificial sheep. And so the heterochromatic child pointed to one, looking to his big brothers for assurance, to which they gave an excited nod. Shoto yelped with glee and spent the rest of the afternoon frolicking with the soon-to-be-mutton chops, completely oblivious to its grim fate and creating a bond with the animal. So when it was finally sunset and the time came to start preparing for the feast, Touya walked over leisurely to Shoto, pushed the grubby hand away from the animal’s collar, and started pulling the creature towards the chopping block. “W-what’re you doing?” Shoto asked uncertainty. “Well, we gotta eat, right? Thanks for picking out such a fat sheep, ‘wonder how it’s gonna taste,”. The eldest grinned with malice at his youngest brother, who started to sniffle and ball his fists. “You’re lying! Leave it alone!” He cried out. “Nope, m’not lying, ask Natsu.” Natsu turns to Shoto and shrugs his shoulders without any real regret. “You’re the one who wanted to come along, right? Think of how proud dad will be of his favorite-he finally sacrificed his first sheep!”
-the first time he was ever asked to lead the namaz, Keigo and Tomura kept kicking the back of his legs so he would fall over while trying to recite the prayers, and in turn he’d immediately whip around in the middle of the whole damn hall and shoot fire at the two howling boys. Needless to say, he was never asked to read again
(one would think since Dabi knows sooo much about being a gOoD mUsLim and how to follow the rules he’d take some of that advice HIMSELF)
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downywrites · 3 years
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 I did my best for this one. I hope I did this well!
Link for ask here
Ranboo was annoyed. That he knew for sure, pacing the outsides of Smajor’s office. He muttered as he walked, trying not to forget why exactly he was pissed. His tails swished, dusting the red carpet below him. He huffed lightly. “When is Scott going to let me in? This is getting stupid!” A small growl escaped him as he glanced at the locked door sitting innocently in front of him. “Just come out of there, Scott. I really, really need to talk to you…” Using one of his haunches, he banged on the door again. ‘This is the third time I’ve done this! When is he going to let me in?’ The sound of the latch unlocking made him sight in relief. “Ah, there he is-” A loud bang went off, making the enderman jump. 
“HELLO! IT IS I, SMAJOR!...where are you?” The man glanced around dramatically, eyes alight with pep and overzealous energy for just about no reason. He let go of the doorknob, wincing a little at the sight of the dent that was steadily worsening. Ranboo was not impressed. He deadpanned at the other, tails flat on the floor and unmoving. “...Seriously? Couldn’t you be a little more serious here?” He showed the littlest part of his teeth, trying to intimidate the shorter of the two of them. Unfortunately, the gesture bounced right off of him, the rather bombastic man walking towards him and pulling him eagerly into his office. “Come in, come in! It’s been so long since someone wanted to come into my room- I mean, office. Take a seat!” With a snap of his fingers, a chair pulled itself out of the wall, situating itself onto the floor. Ranboo’s bicolored eyebrows raised in surprise, but he spoke not. He didn’t want to show him the interest he had. No, he wanted to persuade the MCC moderator into letting him into the place.
 While he babbled on about dinglehoppers and fascinating doodads he had seen on the road while walking last month, he took the time to look around his office. The area was large, as expected of someone who owned so much and had so much power. The whole room screamed smajor, from the loud patterns and decor everywhere, to the carpets below his paws. Itr was obvious that his interior designer told him to do the exact opposite. He shut his eyes, suppressing the urge to wince at the loud textures inverting behind his eyelids. ‘Ow.’ 
He turned his ears to hear the man again, growling under his breath when he realized he still hasn’t stopped speaking. “...and picture this! Your husband, Ranboo, forgot to touch the lever afterwards!” He hooted with laughter, swiveling around in his chair. “Ohoho, it was hilarious!” Ranboo cleared his throat loudly. “Scott? Could we, uh, talk? Please?” Ranboo was on his last nerves at this point. He had been trying to contact him for ages, and this is the first thing he subjects the hybrid with? Preposterous. His ears pinned back, trying to signify his annoyance without hurting his feelings.
 “Well, have you considered the offer I sent you by bird? Or the other three offers by horse? Or that one I delivered to your doorstep personally?” The man leaned forward in his chair, facial expression unreadable. “...hmmm….No, can’t say that I have. Sorry, Oreo man!” Ranboo spluttered indignantly. “What? HOW?” His claws waved about as he angrily gestured at the man, who simply shrugged and giggled to himself. The enderman stopped, taking a breath dramatically. Ears fluttering back and forth in a flurry of emotions, he shut his eyes almost violently. “Okay. As I have asked you several times before, have you at the very least thought of letting me into the MCCs yet? I haven’t done anything to be banned from it, so am I allowed to come in?” 
He opened one heterochromatic eye, hope barely visible in the depths of his pupils. Smajor covered his face with his hand. “Oh, dear. Hmmm….” He acted as if he was genuinely thinking about saying yes, stroking his chin. A small pool of magic shut an open window he wasn’t aware of. “....nah.” Ranboo hissed quietly. “Okay, that’s enough. I’m getting the gun.” The man, almost unbothered, adjusted his tie and cleared his throat softly. “Ah. You know, guns are not allowed in my office.” “Who said it was a physical gun?” Seconds of pure confusion passed. “...what?” Ranboo’s chair pushed back slowly, a look of half-concealed malice (?) evident in his dual colored eyes. Smajor was tempted to get out of his seat, but he thought otherwise. ‘He’s just annoyed because I’m teasing him like this. It’s fine, he’s not going to kill me.’ The enderman slowly walked past the desk, his tails whipping forward in a dangerous gesture. 
The moderator found himself in a steadily worsening situation.
 He held his hands up in a universal placating gesture, hoping that it would calm him down. “Look, we can set up a compromise if you just take a seat. I can give you keys to the best seats in town?” A single elongated fang poked out as he snarled. “I’m going to take that as a no.” With a swift movement, the man found himself on the floor, pissed hybrid pinning his arms down. “I wasn’t kidding when I said that, you know. I was thinking of being nice to you, but now...now, I don’t think so.” One of Ranboo’s hands trailed up to his neck. ‘Is he going to choke me? That’s not very gentlemanly of him.’ His subconscious helpfully supplied. “However, hurting you would be really, really mean. And Tubbo said that this would be a much better option!” ‘Wait, Tubbo?’ A fluttering feeling at his neck made him scrunch up and giggle. “Wahahait!” He shut his eyes, unwilling to look at the person who was definitely smirking in triumph above him. The feeling shifted to his collarbones, then to his ears. Each spot got the same amount of attention, which was, in his opinion, too much.
 “Look, Scott. All you need to do is tell me that you’ll allow me into MCC. That’s all. Just promise me I’ll be let in next time.” He sassed the enderman in return, a forced smile coloring his words. “Iihihi cohohuld ahalso tehehell yohohou thahahat your clothihihing chohohoice reheheminds me of a bohohoy who didn’t know what to wear to prom and came in a full suit during a casual dance.” His hands slowed down as he spoke, before speeding up even quicker, forcing a bout of laughter to escape from Smajor. His dyed hair flipped from side to side as he shook his head, cracked his eyes open to look at the other pleadingly. The enderman processed the movement in his head, smirking a little more again. “Is this flustering you, Scott? You’re so used to being in power. Is this something new for you?” His breath ghosted on his ear, making him shiver through his frantic giggles. 
“Nohoho, I tohohotally dohoho shihihit lihihihike this ohohon ahaha dahahaily bahahasis!” Ranboo clicked his tongue teasingly. “That sounds like sarcasm to me. So, tell me, Scott. Do you know where you are ticklish?” At the sound of the word, his body bucked up into his hands, falling down moments later and prompting a small laughter-filled “oof”. The enderman couldn’t help but aww at him. “Can you not handle the word ‘tickle’?” Another fully body jerk. Scott’s arms pushed against his pinning arm in protest. “Stohohop, yohohou drehehessed-uhuhuhp ohohohreo!” Ranboo recoiled in mock offense. Tails lashing, he looked at him balefully, narrowing his eyes playfully. “Oh, now you’re just provoking me.” He jabbed into the man’s sides, flipping his ears down to avoid the resulting shriek he got from blasting his damn eardrums out. “Guessing sides are a good spot, noted.” A small enderwarble escaped his mouth in slight sympathy at the person writhing under him, but he stood firm, scratching lightly at his lower belly.
 “You know what you have to say, don’t you? Come on, Scott. It’s not hard, just let me in.” Through his laughter, Smajor flipped him off. “FuhUHuck yohohOohoU!” He immediately regretted his decision, bucking wildly as dulled-down claws scraped over his sides again. And again, and again. He couldn’t help the high-pitched squeal that ripped out of his throat as Ranboo shifted just the slightest bit downwards to the connection between his sides and his back. A few shelves to the side of the man fell, magic sputtering out of control. Ranboo curled his tails over his head, wincing as he plucked out a feathery plume from one of them. He traced one over his neck to tease, teeth poking out of his mischievous smile as the other curled up almost violently as he thrashed. He stopped for a moment, allowing the other to calm down and take a few grounding breaths. He put down the feather for now. He’d save that for later, if he needed it. “So.” Ranboo vwooped quietly. “Have you considered my proposal yet?” Scott pushed the bookshelves partially back up. Eyes focused on the furniture behind the enderman, he shook his head, tongue sticking out in concentration. “Not in the slightest.”
 The hybrid rushed to push up his shirt. “B-but!” His hand slowed where it was. “I can accept something else. If you are willing to follow my rules.”
 Ranboo nodded, ears fully perked up and focused. Little particles landed on Scott’s bare lower stomach, making him giggle as he spoke. “Wehell, if you and Tubbo would agree to not be on the same team, nor be on the same team as anyone else you’d have a relative behenefit with, I may allow it. Mahahay.” Ranboo’s tails wagged from side to side, black, white, red, and green blurring into a mix of color behind him. “Maybe?” His eyes gleamed with hope. “May…..these nuts get shoved down your throat! HA!” 
Ranboo’s facial features seemed to darken. 
“Hehe…?” His hand ducked under his shirt, pushing it up fully. Smajor gulped audibly, sucking in his exposed stomach. A pen wiggled in a cloud of his magic, almost nervously. Ranboo kept that in mind, hoping that he’d remember it afterwards. ‘Does his magic respond to his emotions? I’d like to know that...once I’m not trying to make him listen to me.’ With his tummy exposed, the enderman leaned down, breath gentle on the flat of his stomach. “Are you going to say yes now? Or am I going to have to go fully in now?” Scott stayed quiet, barely moving for a moment. A blossom of panic bloomed in Ranboo’s chest. ‘Is he okay? Did I do something?’ A small, almost sheepish smile grew on the other’s face. “Sorry, I was thinking of something snarky. Don’t got anything right now. And, hmm..still thinking about that.” The whites of his teeth broke out through the light pinks of his lips. “The answer’s still no, enderboy. Try your damndest.��� 
He was quick to give him what he wished, diving in to blow one long raspberry on his tummy. It was evident the moderator was not aware of how sensitive he was to raspberries, based on the gasping burst of laughter he got in response. A swear in a different language as he moved closer to his sides, pepperring little raspberries and nibbles all over his trembling muscles.  The sudden change in tenseness as he swiped over a specific spot on his lower belly, his body melting into the floor. Ranboo found it adorable that the sassy man was completely destroyed by a few wiggling fingers on his stomach. He didn’t say it out loud though, for the sake of the moderator’s pride. The laughter settled nicely in his ears. He could get used to this. “AHAHA! RANAHAHA- PLEHEASE!” 
On the other hand, Scott could not get used to this. He definitely wouldn’t be able to keep up for much longer. His laughter strained at his throat a little. He tapped at the enderman with a plume of magic, hoping he’d get the hint. After what felt like a century of tickling for the man below him, Ranboo slowed his nibbling and raspberry blowing, gazing into his dazed eyes. “Yes, Smajor?” “Fihihihine, yahoo’ll behehe uhuhuhnbanned. Lehehet mehehe gohoho!” Ranboo’s tails wagged hesitantly, worried he was just bluffing or making a joke. “Promise?” “Ihihi prohohomise. Juhuhust, nohoho mohohore.”
 His voice was wheezy, almost like an unused flute that hadn’t been taken care of much. Ranboo couldn’t really tamp down the innate sense of pride with the knowledge that he was the one who did that. He was the one who managed to convince Scott, not Tubbo, not Tommy. Him. He did. His tails thumped on the floor loudly, but he was too busy celebrating his win in the confines of his head. Particles whizzed around him faster and faster, landing on things every which way. That included Scott, unfortunately for him.
 He giggled, writhing around as much as he could as the particles slowly landed on his tummy. “Hehehey, ehehenderbohohy? Lehehet mehehe gohoho, plehehease?” No reaction, his eyes far away. His face was contorted into a small smile, but otherwise, his countenance was blank like an empty slate. In other worse, he had literally no clue what was going on. A slight twinge of concern, then. “Uuhuhh, Rahahanbohohoo? Ahahare yohou ehenderwahalking?” Silence. Nothing, absolutely no  response. Scott decided to take things into his own hands. 
“Rahahnbohoo!” 
The pen from earlier slammed into his face, making a small smacking noise as it did so. Ranboo gasped, eyes snapping back into focus at the slight stinging sensation. His bi-colored eyes focused onto him. “What was that for?” Smajor rolled his eyes, using his head and his hands to show the situation he was in. “Did you just forget you have me pinned or what? Dude, you and your brute strength. Goddamn.” His eyes widened in surprise and slight embarrassment. “Oh, I’m so sorry!” His hands were released almost immediately, claws gently scraping against his wrists and making him crack a small wobbly smile. “There you go.”
 He sat up with a small wince, small cloud of magic pushing him a slight bit. Getting up shakily, he slowly walked over to his desk, trying not to trip on any errant pieces of carpet/items strewn about. “I’ll get it done, okay? You just shimmy your way home, oreo. I’ll get it done.” A sigh of relief escaped the hybrid. “Oh, thank god.” As he left the office, he turned to look at the man directly in the eyes. He was getting better at that. “Thanks, sir. I appreciate it.” And, as he left, he may or may not have heard a small mutter follow him. “Fucking hell. He does not need to call me sir after THAT.” He couldn’t help but grin a little. ‘Well, I got him to be serious.’
‘That’s a win for me.’ 
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cobaincreates · 3 years
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warnings: drinking, angst, smut, fingering, nsfw, 18+
count: 10k+
hiiiiiiiii so i’m a horndog & i can’t get enough of rafe cameron (or drew) or college rafe & i also wanna cry over them so here you go. let me know whatcha thinkin’. please i’m begging you. 
also the photo isn’t mine i got it from here!
songs i imagined - this one & this one
— — —
transferring colleges had to have been your smartest decision to date. going from putting your strengths into a place that was not willing to acknowledge them to, now, receiving credit where credit was most deservingly due. your first choice for school had been some place close to home, you figured why not opt for the cheaper option to save yourself, and your parents, a little money. you spent a few months getting into the swing of things, heading to class each day with a fresh mind and hopeful thoughts. it wasn’t until six months in that you realized you deserved so much better, and at a better school.
it took time, figuring out your best bet and where to go and all the finances. you definitely grew impatient a year in, trying to stick it out at home to receive your credits. but once the moment arrived, you packed all your things and moved states away. you loved it; you loved the classes, you loved your friends, you loved your professors. you were completely happy with your choice to go. your parents might not have been, but the weekly calls home for your progress report were substitute enough.
wednesday, 5 p.m.
you scribbled a doodle you had been going over and over, darkening the lines so much you saw it behind your eyelids now. you snapped out of it and looked back at your textbook.
the library was so quiet, you heard pages being turned from every corner, the chewing of gum from a tense jaw, and the soft snores of someone passed out in one of the private cubicles across the way. none of those things distracted you really since you had come to the study session with a couple of your friends, all three of you making a pact to get shit done.
melly was able to listen to music while she studied and was more of a typer as her fingers moved fast along the keys of her laptop. she came dressed in her comfiest clothes, sporting a knit sweater and joggers. lina had snacks across the table to keep her sustained. she was a strong believer that she learned better while being fed. it made you laugh still. she was a writer like you, very organized in her notes with highlighters and different colored pens. she even drew headers for each page for the hell of it. you wondered where she got the drive. then there was you, black ink, the main topic underlined, things to remember written repeatedly. you learned better after writing things down, you couldn’t just read a book and have the information implanted in your brain. as much as you wished it were that easy.
you were studying for an upcoming psychology test, one that you were sure would be a piece of cake given how well you did in the class itself. it was one you didn’t plan on taking, but you needed another course to get enough credits for the year.
lina was munching on some almonds, turning a page in her notebook, and picking up a blue pen. you were in the middle of writing a definition down and filling up the last of the page, your hand starting to cramp with how much pressure you were using. you flexed it once you put your pen down and squeezed an imaginary ball.
both yours and lina’s eyes flicked up to melly across the table who let out a low moan. she was pulling her headphones off and looking in the completely opposite direction of her computer.
“why is he so fine?” she asked, low enough for the two of you to hear.
you looked over your shoulder at the same time lina did and searched in the general area melly was focused on. all you saw was a guy walking through the library, sporting a backpack and a lacrosse sweatshirt, the hood pulled over his head.
“he really knows what he’s doing, huh?” lina said dreamily.
you furrowed your eyebrows as you watched him turn into a row of books and you glanced at melly as you faced the other way, planning on getting back to your work. melly was dazed as she still looked in his direction.
“who is that?” you asked after a moment of both of them still ogling.
lina turned toward you as melly closed her laptop a little to lean over it. “what did you just say?”
you looked between the two identical shocked expressions and laughed helplessly. “who is that?”
“oh, i forgot. you’re still new.” melly nodded in semi-acceptance then became serious. “that’s rafe cameron. he’s on the lacrosse team and we’re kind of obsessed with him.”
“it’s alarming,” lina said. she gave a quick glance over her shoulder then looked back at her notebook. “i love making myself sad over him not noticing me, but it’s fine. what’s even more alarming is how he’s still single.”
“i cannot express to you, y/n, how good,” melly emphasized, squeezing her eyes shut, “he looks with a little sweat.”
“you guys sound like stalkers.” you pointed out, smiling a little at their explanations.
“i’m not denying it. i said it was alarming.” lina shrugged as she looked from her textbook to her writing. “we’ve talked to him a couple of times at some parties, he’s a super nice guy but we just find him attractive. i think if i were a freshman, i’d be pathetically pining after him.”
melly hummed in agreement, her chin now propped in her palm. she wore a doe-like look, gazing between yours and lina’s heads and into the bookshelves. “don’t they have a game tomorrow? we should go.”
“it’s away.” lina said, but you had already lost interest in the topic and started reading a new chapter. you picked your pen back up, the muscles in your hand now relaxed, and the boy in the bookshelves out of your mind.
monday, 9 a.m.
you were going to be late and you hated the thought. there was no way you could miss this test when you had done nothing but study every last page for it. you even lost track of how many pages of notes you wrote for the test alone. it would be such a waste to miss it and it wasn’t worth getting a negative grade.
being late was not at all your fault. you had set your alarm early, eaten breakfast and read a few more chapters to get ahead, and packed your bag up so you’d be ready after a quick shower. turned out that all the showers on your floor were broken, the yellow “do not cross” tape like a bad omen. you started muttering to yourself as you carried along your shower caddy, going down to the next floor and finding a line to wait in. you knew it was probably your best bet instead of racing to another floor to check if there were more lines, plus you didn’t know how much time you had. you probably annoyed some people with the fidgeting, but all you could think about was the test.
it was ridiculous how long the showers took and how you had to leave your hair damp as you ran back up physical stairs. you burst through your door, threw your bathroom things on your bed, grabbed your bag and the few books you couldn’t stuff in. while leaving, the door shutting behind you, you made do with damp hair, twisting it up and out of your face. as you checked the time, you figured out that you had eight minutes exactly to get across campus and in your seat with a writing utensil ready.
even though you were late, you still held doors open for people, and you dodged others walking the opposite direction instead of the other way around. you kept checking the time as if the minutes would stop moving.
just as you were looking into your bag, your legs moving fast and assuredly, you ran right into something hard. you dropped the textbooks that you had been clutching, even with a death grip on them, and your bag slipped from your shoulder. a notebook poked out along with a pen rolling away on the walkway.
“woah,” the hard surface said.
“i’m so sorry, i was not looking.” you said quickly and bent down to get your things. of course, this would happen while you were in a rush. you supposed you were lucky it didn’t involve cars. god, that would’ve been so much worse.
“nah, it’s alright.” they said easily and bent down beside you, retrieving your things.
you scrambled for everything and shoved the notebook back into your bag. you spotted your keychain near their foot, their fingers closing around it before you could reach for it. you finally looked up as they held the key out to you, the ring hanging from their finger.
rafe cameron.
he looked different now that you could see his face better. and also, because he was so close this time. it was odd to know now that he had blue eyes and a light ghosting of stubble along his jaw and cheeks. it felt too personal being this close to someone you only knew the name of.
you felt a little silly for bumping into him, but you didn’t let it show. “thank you,” you said as you took the key from him and stood quickly to walk away. lina and melly surely wouldn’t give this up when you told them.
rafe had watched after you for a moment before turning back to his friend topper, raising his eyebrows in reference to what happened, and continuing their conversation.
you made it to class about three minutes late and sat in your seat, finally taking a breath. you settled in, putting your things at your feet, and digging around for a pen. all thoughts of bumping into rafe cameron left your mind.
8 p.m.
“you what?” melly coughed violently as she composed herself. lina was clutching her stomach, nearly dying of hysterics when the drink came out of melly’s nose a second earlier.
you held your head in your hands and inwardly groaned at having to tell the story. you were out to dinner with the two girls, munching on french fries and milkshakes. it was typical for you three to hang out on mondays since melly usually had a bad case of them each week. you had innocently slipped in that you just so happened to run into rafe cameron this morning and well, you hadn’t expected that to be melly’s reaction.
“i ran into him. i was late this morning and i wasn’t looking.” you could feel the embarrassment settle in as you recounted the minor event, at least to you.
“did he say anything?” her eyes were blown wide as she leaned across the table.
“i didn’t try to have a conversation with him.” you shrugged and picked at the plate of fries at the center of the table. melly gave you a look of mild bewilderment, the shock of it wearing off.
“missed opportunity.” lina joked, taking a long sip of her shake. “i wouldn’t know what to say either if i ran into him.”
you felt your shoulders loosen as the topic was slowly changing. melly laughed at lina’s remark, teasing her that she would’ve frozen up from bumping into anybody. you smiled and were glad that both of them didn’t take the story too seriously.
minutes later you were laughing loudly, head thrown back as melly was telling a story about her family and a public mishap with a tire. it was interesting to you to hear about what it was like growing up in a completely different environment than the one you did. you supposed that’s something you loved about college; getting to meet people from so many other states and cities.
you were smiling to yourself as you dipped a fry into your shake. just as you put it into your mouth and looked across the table at melly, her composure changed.
“oh, fuck.” she whispered and noticeably tried to look away. “don’t look.”
both you and lina turned around to look toward the front door. a dense group of bodies was coming in through the door, the atmosphere’s volume increasing with their chatter. toward the back you recognized rafe cameron. you weren’t sure at all what it was that made your heart clench in your chest.
“i said don’t look!” melly whispered louder. “oh, god. okay. act normal.” melly straightened up, trying not to be obvious with looking in their direction. you laughed and sat back in the seat. lina practically sunk into hers.
you didn’t watch as they approached, but you did look up once rafe entered your peripheral vision. he was with the guy from this morning, even if you hadn’t noticed him before. you just remembered rafe crouched in front of you while someone just as tall stood behind him, waiting. both of them were sporting lacrosse sweatshirts, along with some others in the group.
“hey, rafe.” melly said easily like she hadn’t just been freaking out over him a second ago.
you watched rafe lift his chin, smiling genuinely at her. you didn’t think anything of it when he glanced at you, the recognition so obvious as his face changed. he continued to walk to his table though, eyes steady on you for what felt like too long.
melly turned around and sank over the table, her mouth open in shock. “oh my god,” she said above the surface.
“oh my god,” lina said, turning to you in bafflement. “i feel like i’m in an alternate universe. did that just happen?”
“he just recognized me.” you brushed it off.
“no, y/n, he knew you. that was longer than five seconds.”
“why are you guys so obsessed with him anyways?” you laughed, trying to take the attention off you.
lina shrugged, seeming taken aback with the question. “i don’t really know.”
“because he’s gorgeous, that’s why.” melly intervened, dipping a fry into her shake.
you looked over melly’s shoulder, wondering what it was exactly that was so intriguing about the lacrosse player. you had had your fair share of athletes and could agree on some being drop dead gorgeous. maybe rafe cameron was just a nice guy all around and melly and lina just had pleasant interactions with him. maybe he was the type of college boy that looked out for everyone’s wellbeing and that’s what made your friends obsess over him. it could be a number of things.
thursday, 8 p.m.
you rubbed your eyes, yawning in the middle of it, and lay back on your bed. you had just closed your computer after typing up a 10-page essay. it was nine when you started it this morning. you were just glad your one class of the day was canceled and that you had time to write the paper before next week. plus, there were no classes tomorrow, and you could have a whole day of doing nothing. you were stoked, to say the least.
feeling a vibration beside you, you reached for your phone and opened a text from lina. incoming in 5, it said, followed by a rattling of knocks on your door. you rolled off the bed and shuffled over, finding her and melly with wide smiles. it was infectious as you felt your own smile appearing on your face.
“what are you guys doing here?” you asked curiously, stepping aside to let them in. the door clicked softly shut as you followed melly to your bed where she went to sit. lina leaned against the wall across from you, careful of your roommate’s things.
“we were invited to a party and we were wondering if you wanted to come with.” lina said, sharing a quick look with melly.
you glanced between them, eyes narrowing. “what’s so special about this party?”
“god, how can you even tell that?” melly asked, slightly rolling her eyes.
“you guys have known each other longer than i've known either of you, but you’re easy to read.” you laughed.
“i don’t like that.” melly said quietly to herself.
you grinned at her, noting her curls springing around her face. melly usually had her hair pulled back out of the way and it was very rare to see her with a different hairstyle. there had been some days where she had braids and you enjoyed seeing the change of pace. lina on the other hand always let her hair down. tonight though, she had straightened it and thrown it into a high ponytail. you hadn’t really gone to a lot of parties with the girls, so seeing them all done-up was always fascinating.
“seriously, what’s the deal?” you asked again, looking to lina since she was the one who had proposed the idea.
she shared another look with melly again before finally coming out with it. “it’s at rafe cameron’s apartment.”
you felt that clenching again in your chest, in that same spot from last night. you swallowed, feeling how dry your mouth was in the span of three seconds.
“well, it’s his and topper’s apartment, so not technically just his.” lina said, waving her hand in enunciation. she crossed her arms. “i have this study group with topper and he invited me and mel and anyone else really.”
“come on, it’ll be fun.” melly said, nudging your arm.
you looked at the girl beside you, ready to say no mostly in panic of seeing rafe. you had nothing to worry about or freak out over, but it was a scary thought. so many things happened at parties. so many things could happen.
“okay,” you said easily.
the prior fears dissipated quickly as lina and melly gave a small cheer and encouraged you to get ready, and to take your time. you spent the next ten minutes asking them what you should wear, going through your side of the closet. all three of you agreed on a plaid skirt you had bought a few weeks before on a spontaneous shopping trip. you only wore it once since then and had been meaning to pull it out again. you paired it with a sweater, something easy to keep you warm through the night instead of bringing a jacket along. lina and melly agreed excitedly when you changed and raised your eyebrows, searching for approval.
9 p.m.
holding on tightly to lina’s hand, you laughed hysterically to the point of tears and a clear indicator in the nether region that you had to pee, badly. a connie bailey rae cover was playing from a speaker near you, your laughter probably not as loud as you thought it to be as you calmed down. melly stopped her ridiculous reenactment and pulled an exaggerated disgusted face as she dodged someone trying to dance with her. you shook with laughter and took a long sip of your drink, tilting your head back to finish it in one gulp.
the party had been way more fun than you thought it would be, especially when you walked the four blocks to get there. lucky for you, you had been smart and worn flat boots. the apartment was a good size for the event and had plenty of space to gather, enough left over for those that wanted a break from either dancing or just to relax. some people you didn’t recognize had the large tv on, a video game on the bright screen. there was plenty of shouting coming from their general direction, a wave of arms and pointing of rigid fingers.
you had seen rafe in passing, but never made the initial eye contact as if to let each other know that you were near. stepping into the apartment and being greeted with his friend topper, you felt like you were intruding or trespassing by being in rafe’s space. you didn’t know him, or topper for that matter, and it felt odd to you to be in their physical home.
“where’s the bathroom?” you asked lina as melly went to get more snacks.
lina stood up on her toes and pointed at a closed door. “i'm pretty positive it’s over there.”
you gave her a nod and walked in the direction she pointed you in, finding a couple people waiting against the wall. you took a place there and acted as a fly on the wall for a total of five minutes since the line went fast. once inside, you took a deep breath, feeling refreshed at the open window and the cool air coming in.
you dried your hands and placed the towel back where it was on the counter and opened the door. the next person waiting rushed in rather quickly, making you stumble against the doorway. you laughed to yourself and felt the rush of sudden wind as the door slammed.
excusing yourself past a small group, you headed toward the refreshments. you were already thirsty after having emptied your bladder seconds before, but you were aware it was just the addictive alcohol buzzing through your system. it was crowded closer to the drinks, rightfully so, and it only took one person to move for you to see rafe acting as a stand-in bartender.
part of you wanted to run right back out of the kitchen and find lina and melly, but the other part of you wanted to give a swift kick to your rear. you chose the latter and walked over to where he was at the counter. he was in the middle of pouring someone else’s drink and you stood on his other side, taking in his appearance while you still could. the blue hat on his head read “obx”, turned backwards. he wore an off-white t-shirt, the graphic design on the back drawing you in. you were too busy staring at his shoulders molded with the fabric to realize he had turned around and you were now staring at his chest. you blinked up at his face, smiling lightly.
“hi.” he said, a small lilt to his voice as he recognized you once again.
“hi.”
“can i get you something?” he asked, and you felt your shoulders falter a little, thinking that was all he was going to say to you. stick to his image of drink tender and have you go on your way. but his body told you differently as he turned fully to face you.
“um, i can get it.” you said, the instant flight taking effect at the very prospect of being shot down.
rafe nodded and stepped out of the way, moving further into the corner of the counter. you smiled at him and poured your own drink, mixing up your favorite. rafe still stood there and you could feel the strong vice his eyes had on you. it made you a little self-conscious, but you relaxed with a deep breath.
“i never got your name.” rafe said just as you took a sip and turned to leave the kitchen. “you know, from the other day.”
“that’s because i was too busy bumping into you.” you let out a small laugh and stepped closer to him, out of the way if someone wanted a drink. you turned your back to the fridge and tried to find a spot to lean on as rafe looked down at you, a smile playing at his lips. “i am sorry about that again. i was in a rush for a class.”
“it’s no problem. i’m just glad you’re okay, we hit pretty hard.”
“y/n.” you said and held out a hand respectfully.
“rafe,” he slipped his hand into yours, warm and strong, and smiled widely.
“i think i’ve heard your name only a million times in the past week.” you admitted, knowing that lina and melly would kill for brownie points. “my friends are a bit obsessed with you and fully willing to educate the newbie.”
“obsessed, huh? lina and mel, right?”
you nodded and took another sip. rafe reached on the counter and grabbed a handful of pretzels. he held some out to you. “they’re nice girls,” rafe said easily. “i’ve hung out with them a couple times, but i didn’t know they were obsessed.” he laughed to himself.
you munched on a pretzel and froze at an idea. “you’re not going to tell them i told you, are you?”
“not unless you want me to.”
you stared at him for a bit longer than you planned, then let out a breath and took another pretzel from his hand. it was odd to be sharing food with him when just the other day you felt like your heart was tearing in your chest. at the moment, you could only feel a dull ache.
“so, how do you like it?” rafe asked.
“like what?”
“campus, the college.”
you nodded and swallowed some of your drink to wash the pretzels down. “things have been really great. i enjoy it here. it’s an immense difference than my first college back home, so i’m happy.”
rafe smiled. “and the party?”
you followed his nod to the people around you, glancing to your original spot where you left lina. you didn’t see her anywhere until some people moved and you found her and melly sat on the couch. they were playing the video game with a whole mess of guys. you grinned.
“the party is great.” you commended, looking back at him. he had finished the rest of the pretzels in his hand.
“good.” he nodded. “i always get nervous when top and i invite people over. we’ve done it a bunch of times, but there’s always the possibility of something going wrong.”
“well, you’re doing great. both of you. hopefully, nothing horrible happens.”
11 p.m.
you would be lying if you said that your conversation with rafe from hours ago wasn’t still running through your head. it was difficult not to think about it when you kept seeing him more often throughout the party. most of the time you’d catch his eye, or vice versa, and instantly smile. you’d then recall the sound of his laugh and would even hear it from feet away. the clenching in your chest was now accompanied by a swirling in your stomach.
you were pacing yourself with your drinks, but by now you were on your fifth of the night. you were completely aware of everything around you and you were enjoying the ongoing buzz. lina and melly were a bit more inebriated than you were, which only added to the fun.
the two girls in front of you were swaying to a song together, not even close to being slow tempo. it was very upbeat, the bass pumping through the walls. the front door to the apartment was now open since it had begun to get warmer with the more and more people that were joining. a few windows were thrown open as well.
“you remember how in freshman year you fell down that flight of stairs and twisted your ankle and practically bashed your head in and then your mom yelled at you and then your sister called to tell you she was pregnant and then your dad! oh my god, and then your dad was like ‘hey i’m thinking of leaving your mom so uh, yeah’ and then your mom was so pissed but then she was fine because she found a total hunk of a man to replace your dad like that,” melly snapped her fingers as your body started to shake with laughter. lina was laughing too, not at all bothered with a quick recap of her, very shitty, first year.
“yes, thank you for reminding me mel. i love when we have tantalizing conversation like this.” lina leaned her head against the others’.
mel giggled, a few hiccups escaping. “i think i need to pee.”
“god, you’re like a peeing machine.” lina sighed and tightened her arm around melly.
“that’s what drinking will do to you.”
lina rolled her eyes and looked at you as she brought melly to the bathroom. you asked quickly if she needed help, but she shook her head and promised they’d be back soon. you watched them go then turned back to the party, turning too fast and not feeling the presence behind you in the moment. a cool liquid pooled over and down your chest, soaking the fabric of your sweater. you gasped at the contact, your mouth dropping open and looking down at the dark stain.
“i— “ you looked up to tell the person it was fine before an apology came out, finding that off-white t-shirt on a very familiar blue-eyed person. “we have to stop meeting like this.”
rafe looked horrified at having spilled his drink all over your sweater, his eyes wide as they stared at your chest.
“that’s the most cliché thing to say.” you said, laughing lightly to ease the tension so obvious in his features.
he let out a laugh too. “you can borrow something of mine. come on,” he held out his hand and you took it willingly, realizing some people were staring at the accident way too curiously. you let rafe lead you up the stairs, the complete darkness on the landing causing you to focus solely on his hand in yours.
rafe opened a door and flipped a light on, your eyes adjusting to the brightness. he led you further in and closed the door behind you before rushing to his dresser, a whole display of cologne bottles on top. as he rummaged through the drawers, you stood just in front of the door, a little timid to step further in. you were holding your sweater away from your chest, already feeling the stickiness of liquid on your skin.
“how’s this one?” he asked, holding out a simple white one.
“you don’t have to give me a shirt.”
“it’s the least i can do. the bathroom is right there.” he handed the shirt to you and nodded just behind your shoulder. you thanked him and went in, closing the door with a click. you pulled the sweater off and dampened a washcloth, wiping the dried drink from your skin. pulling the shirt on, you relished in how soft it was and styled the piece of fabric so it looked better with your skirt.
rafe was sitting on a couch next to his bed, more like a futon, his hands in his pockets and hat off his head. he looked up as you came out, straightening his posture and looking you up and down.
“i’m sorry.” he smiled guiltily.
you smiled and walked over, moving around the small circular coffee table and sitting next to him. “guess it was payback for the other day,” you teased as you folded your sweater and set it next to you.
rafe rolled his eyes with a knowing smile. you glanced at him as you leaned back, feeling the softness and rigidness of the futon. “you look good in my shirt.”
“i feel better in a less damp one.” you said, easing the fluttering in your stomach. your chest clenched again as you crossed your legs.
glancing around rafe’s room, you admired the movie posters on the walls and the multiple lacrosse paraphernalia. one of his jerseys lay crumpled at the end of his bed, the comforter pulled over the pillows to look made. it was better than you did with your bed, you were pretty sure yours was unmade and messy.
it was a decent sized room, plus the bathroom was nice to have. you’d kill for your own bathroom again. it would be nice not to wait in a line. you told yourself that you just had to figure out an earlier schedule so you could beat the crowd.
after a once-over of rafe’s room, you looked over at him to find him already looking at you. he was fully analyzing your face, you could see his eyes flickering to different parts.
you swallowed and licked your lips. “what?”
“nothing.” he said quickly and sighed, laying his head back on the couch.
you squinted at him, now tracing over his features. he looked nervous from what you could tell, his hands moving in his pockets. you stared at his chest moving up and down slowly, the intake of breath coming as it grew bigger. his adam’s apple protruded, bobbing slightly as he swallowed. your chest clenched once again as you looked at his face, watching him look up at the ceiling. he really was handsome. you shifted in your seat, switching your leg over the other.
“that look wasn’t nothing.” you commented, breathing in.
“what look?” he turned his head toward you, eyebrows slightly pushing together. you watched every change in his face, from his eyebrows to his eyes blinking then to his tongue peeking out to lick his lips.
“the look of ‘i want to eat you up’.”
he laughed, the couch shaking with him. “what does that entail?”
“major gazing and bedroom eyes.”
“bedroom eyes, huh?” he hummed and lifted his head. his lips tugged at a smirk.
“am i imagining things?” you asked seriously, slightly doubting if you made the right call. maybe he wasn’t thinking what you thought he had been. maybe you were imagining things.
rafe didn’t answer, instead looking down at the floor. the smirk alone told you that you had been right. his hands flexed in his pockets, hard for you to miss. a few silent minutes passed, the both of you listening to the party still going on downstairs.
“if you want to kiss me, all you have to do is ask.” you said quietly. after a moment you figured he hadn’t heard you, that he had lost himself in staring at the carpet.
“can i?”
“yes,” you nodded.
rafe sat up and met your eyes, moving closer until his thigh was touching yours. you shifted your upper half closer to him, feeling a wave of shivers run through you the second his hand touched your cheek. you instinctively pressed your legs tighter together as your heartbeat picked up and rafe lowered over you, licking his lips once more. they were soft and firm, just as they needed to be. he tilted your chin up, his thumb brushing just beside your mouth as you kissed.
seconds later, you brought your own hands to his face. you were eager to touch him, to feel the solidness of him against you. it was mostly a reassurance that this was in fact happening and that you weren’t dreaming. you pushed a hand into his hair just behind his ear and mirrored the last few pecks he was leaving you before he fully pulled away. you felt a pinch of disappointment, the small taste for him now growing bigger. you had to stop your hands from pulling him back.
he pulled away only a little and you opened your eyes to see him still so close and looking over your face. your breaths mingled together.
“what?” you huffed, letting your head fall back for a second in slight irritation. you just wanted to kiss him again. you let your hand slide down from his hair, resting near his shoulder. you wanted to squeeze the muscle under your hand.
“nothing.” he said again, eyes flickering down to your lips once more. he smiled, holding himself up on the back of the couch. his thumb brushed the same spot on your cheek. “don’t tell anyone, but i’ve been imagining this since you showed up tonight.”
you returned your hand to his hair, slightly scratching with a smile. “i knew you spilled your drink on purpose.”
rafe grinned widely and moved back into you. this kiss was deeper, your lips opening for him when you felt his tongue. his hand left your cheek and appeared on your hip, ever so slightly pushing your shirt up so he could touch your skin at your waist. you smiled against him as you felt his hand slowly creep up the shirt. you were reminded again that it was his and you pulled him closer by the back of the neck, hearing a soft moan leave his lips. your thighs squeezed, your excitement starting to rise.
“you just gave it to me and now you want to take it off?” you teased as rafe’s hand covered one of your breasts, the cool air of the room reaching your skin. rafe smiled and kissed you again.
his hand disappeared, apparently changing his mind, and reappeared on your thigh. you breathed in sharply at the warmth coming from his palm, resting just above your knee. your brain started to spaz for a moment and you imagined a bunch of smaller yous, running in circles like their heads were cut off.
rafe’s hand stayed steady as you uncrossed your legs, a silent invitation. he moved to kiss the corner of your mouth. “is this okay?”
the fact that he was pulling away multiple times to check in on you had to be evidence enough of why lina and melly liked him so much. you hadn’t met many guys that were so in tune with consent or caring about what you wanted. it turned you on seeing it coming from him.
“yes.” you nodded as you touched his forearm, not wanting to seem too eager.
you anticipated his hand moving and when it did, you held back the moan. you were much too eager for teasing and he was showing no signs of not giving you want you wanted. as he got closer to you, you placed your hand over his. he pulled you back for a kiss and you decided to focus on that for a moment to lessen your nerves.
his touch was soft once he met your underwear. his fingers pressed over you and you shivered from how wet you had become because of him. he hummed into your mouth, only adding to the pooling between your legs. his hand reached back and pushed your skirt further up so he could get to you more easily.
you let out a satisfied sigh against his lips as he ran a finger through your folds, collecting your wetness. your underwear had been pushed to the side, out of the way, finally feeling his touch.
“are you this wet for me?” he asked. you nodded against his forehead and pulled him back, letting out a moan as he brushed over your clit. it was only for a second, but you were about ready to burst.
you opened your legs wider for rafe, his fingers moving over you and exploring the new area. you gripped his hand to silently ask him for more along with an impatient moan. you wanted his fingers so badly in places you weren’t ready to admit yet. he wanted the opposite.
“talk to me.” he said, nudging the side of your face with his nose, planting a kiss to your jaw. you opened your eyes that had fallen shut, your breath getting heavier. your chest felt like it was going to cave in.
“please,” you said, adjusting your hips. “please, touch me.”
“i am.” he pulled away, a menacing smirk on his face just to gauge your reaction.
you huffed out and pulled his hand closer. “you know what i mean, rafe.”
“i like when you say my name.” he pressed a kiss to your lips sweetly.
“i might like when you touch me, so get on with it already.”
rafe laughed huskily, his breath blowing over your face. “you want my fingers?”
you wanted to roll your eyes at how badly he wanted you to beg, but you wanted his fingers more. “yes, please. i want your fingers. give me something.”
you let go of his hand as he finally pushed a finger into you. you adjusted around him for a moment and felt the need to close your legs to keep him there. he pulled your lips back to his, his tongue quick to lick into you. you held his face again as his finger started to move inside of you.
“you want another, pretty girl?” he asked after a few moments passed. you nodded again, breathing hoarsely, too intoxicated in him to speak. a second finger pushed into you then, stretching you ever so slightly. you sighed, letting your head fall back to the couch.
“you’re so wet.” he said as he moved his fingers, delighting in the sounds he was making with you in the palm of his hand. “you’re taking my fingers so well, y/n. do they feel good?”
you moaned as he said your name for the first time. it was something you didn’t think you’d like so much, but with the current situation, it was wonderful.
rafe’s lips appeared on your neck. you held the back of his head as he pressed a few kisses then closed his lips over a spot closer to your collarbone. if your breath had been short then, it was even shorter now as he worked to leave a mark on you. with all the attention you were getting, it only brought you closer to your release, and you started to move your hips. he freed your skin, startled at your movements, then amazed as he watched you chase his fingers. the spot he left throbbed now, all your blood rushing to two places at once.
“are you going to come?” he asked as you heard the start of song you had been replaying for the past few weeks. it was muffled and you could barely hear the words, but you knew it by heart.
“yes, fuck.” you looked up at him, taking in the sight. he was breathing over you, his eyes never straying too far from yours as your mouth opened in pleasure. “rafe, make me come.”
you squeezed your eyes shut as he kissed you hard, breathing deeply into your mouth. he reached his thumb to your clit and began to draw circles at a normal pace with his fingers. your stomach started to twist, the familiar feeling forming fast as he picked up the pace. he could tell you were close by the sheer dig of your fingertips on the back of his neck. it only edged him on more to bring you to your climax.
“come on my fingers.” he said, eyes half closed as he looked at you, lips brushing over yours as he spoke. you whimpered and felt your hips twitch before stilling completely, trapping rafe’s hand between your legs, as you came undone. his thumb continued to move to help you through it. your jaw went slack, eyes rolling under your eyelids, as you moaned loudly. you felt an overwhelming sense of content, the adrenaline rush coming and going quickly.
your blood pumped in your ears and it took you a few moments to register rafe giving you subtle kisses all over the underside of your jaw. you breathed in shakily and let your head fall back on the couch, your knees separating. rafe took his hand away and you winced as he did. you already missed the contact.
the moment was completely ruined as his name was called up the stairs. rafe’s lips disappeared from you as he looked toward the door. you didn’t know what came over you as you pulled your skirt down over your thighs, the footsteps heavy outside his door before a couple of his friends burst in.
“guys, come on. get the fuck out!” he shouted in annoyance, sitting up completely, his leg still touching yours.
“woah, sorry.” they said as they took in your presence. you shifted and knew that they could probably tell what you and rafe had been doing. they evidently didn’t care as they went into a whole spiel of something that had taken place downstairs. rafe tried to stop them and their alcohol-induced exuberance.
he looked at you over his shoulder, touching you lightly on the knee. “i'm sorry.” he said, his friends not hearing as they talked to one another. “i'll see you downstairs?”
part of you felt completely stupid when he said it, like everything that had happened moments ago was just an imagination. you felt your shoulders slump, but you nodded and got up anyways. the door was quick to close behind you and you were left in the dark landing, leaning against the wall to catch your breath. you smoothed your hair, took a deep breath, and fixed your underwear and skirt again.
your eyes adjusted gradually as you went down the stairs back into the swing of things. you swallowed, your mouth still dry post-climax. you went into the kitchen and filled up a cup with water, downing it slowly and stepping out of the way of some people. you couldn’t help but feel drained as you watched the people around you, laughing, dancing, and drinking. you had just spent the last 30 minutes in rafe cameron’s room and now you didn’t know what to do with yourself.
“y/n!” you looked up at melly coming toward you, her makeup slightly smudged, but that didn’t change how great she looked. “there you are!”
you gave her an assured smile and finished the water in your cup. “hey.” you tried not to let anything show.
“lina and i are ready to go if you want to come with. i think we’re going to get some food somewhere in town. i was thinking curly fries or a veggie burger. lina is dying for— wait, where did you go? we looked everywhere.” her expression suddenly changed to one of concern as she stepped closer to you.
“i— uh, well clearly not everywhere.” you said shamelessly, feeling your neck grow warm.
melly opened her mouth to say something then stopped. “oh my god, why are you so flushed? what happened to your sweater?” she looked at the shirt, her eyes catching on something near your collarbone. her eyes went wide as you tried to hide the mark. “oh my god!”
monday, 4 p.m.
“i was thinking that it could go more like this,” your friend said as she pressed a few buttons on her laptop. a new beat started from the computer, the screen following along with the track. you bobbed your head along with the beat.
the campus coffeeshop was somewhere you liked to go, mostly to meet your friends, but you also enjoyed the coffee. sometimes before class you’d make it just in time to get an extra scone before they were all gone. it was a cozy place too, filled with older antiques and an endless display of guitars on every wall. sometimes they’d have an open mic for students, letting anyone with any sort of musical or comical talent perform. most of the acts were later in the week though so no one had to worry about coursework.
after your classes today, you had met up with a friend you hadn’t seen in a while. she was eager to show you what she had been working on for her musical composition classes and you had expressed that you were willing to listen.
the past weekend had been spent mulling over a certain party and a certain someone you couldn’t seem to forget. not that you tried to, to be fair. you’d hadn’t seen him since, which was nothing new given the amount of times you had encountered the boy since that day on campus or seen him for the first time in the library. you didn’t find things weird, but things were left upspoken and it had been bothering you. you knew that melly or lina could’ve easily gotten his number for you, had you asked, but you couldn’t bring yourself to, nor did you know what you would say. all you could do was hope that he was doing well and maybe, perhaps, thinking of you too.
it was inevitable to escape having to talk about what happened in rafe’s room with melly and lina. you weren’t willing to share all of the details right down to what he smelled like, but you didn’t deny that nothing occurred. they seemed satisfied when you recounted having to change your sweater and rafe being kind enough to offer you one of his shirts.
speaking of the shirt, you had gone to your dorm that night and taken it off, seeing that “cameron” was written on the back, along with a large number. no doubt it was for lacrosse. the prospect of it made you shiver before folding it up to leave on your desk. you hadn’t touched it since.
“christ, i've got a meeting with my advisor soon.” your friend said, quickly exiting the program on her screen and closing her computer. “thank you again so much for listening. i can’t express how relieving it is to have someone do this.”
you waved her off with a sweet smile and packed up your own things. “i'm always around if you need a first-time listener.”
both of you stood and pushed the metal chairs in. you followed her to the exit, listening to her as she explained the reasoning for her upcoming meeting. both doors opened, the one from her pushing and the other from rafe coming in. you looked up as he met your eyes, and you couldn’t deny how good it was to see him.
“hey,” he smiled at you as all three of you paused.
before you could say anything, the words sticking to your tongue, you looked back to your friend. she was looking between the both of you, unsure of what was going on. you swallowed and acknowledged her. “i’ll see you later?”
a small smile came onto her face as she looked at rafe then back to you and nodded. the door closed softly behind her. you looked back at rafe as you felt his hand ghosting over your forearm.
“hi,” you said finally.
“it’s good to see you. come up with me?” he gestured to the register and you nodded, letting him take your hand. you didn’t think too much of it as you stood alongside him as he ordered. when the cashier asked if there would be anything else, rafe looked at you expectantly. you blanked for a second, remembering that you didn’t get a drink earlier when you first arrived. you had immediately gone for a sandwich, satisfied that that would be your dinner.
rafe pulled out his wallet and paid for the two drinks. he then led you toward the pick-up counter and faced you with a soft smile. “how have you been?”
“okay,” you breathed in deeply. you weren’t exactly sure how to answer. were you supposed to tell him how freaked out you had been? no, you decided, best not to. “the weekend was busy.”
“mine too. i've got practice tonight so i thought i’d stop by for some energy. i’m glad i ran into you.”
you refrained from asking him if he was serious. you could see on his face that he was with the way he looked at you. “rafe—”
before you could say much of anything else, rafe’s hands appeared on your cheeks and his lips pressed to yours. you kissed him back just as gently even though you wanted to do more now that you felt him again. he pulled away as his order was called, turning to thank the barista as he took the two cups.
“come to my place to study? after practice, i mean.” he said as he held your cup out to you. you looked at it then back up at his questioning eyes, a sliver of hope in them. you pushed down the question at the tip of your tongue and accepted the coffee.
“we’re just studying?”
rafe beamed and nodded. “i have a huge test tomorrow that i can’t fail, so yes.”
7 p.m.
before parting ways with rafe earlier he had finally taken your phone and put his number in it, but not before taking an odd photo of himself. it made you laugh watching it happen though. he promised that he would be done with practice around now and you left your dorm a little earlier than you planned to. it was out of pure thrill really.
knocking on the front door, you waited patiently for it to be answered. you shifted the books in your arms as you heard soft footsteps behind the door. rafe opened it, standing in loose-fitting clothes with damp hair. he smiled instantly and welcomed you in.
it was a drastic difference compared to the party. the house was eerily quiet, so quiet you could hear a pin drop. rafe turned to you from the door.
“how many books did you bring?” he asked seriously, glancing at them against your chest.
“just two,” you said defensively only until you saw the grin. you rolled your eyes and turned away from him to kick your shoes off.
he was chuckling to himself as he went into the kitchen and pulled out snacks to have. “do you want anything to drink?”
“water would be great.”
“smart choice. less sticky.” he said, his back to you, but you could hear the satisfied tone of his voice at his remark.
once he gathered drinks and a plate of snacks, he led you upstairs. it was brighter this time with his door already open and lights already on. you glanced at the other closed one down the short hall, finding the sliver underneath completely dark. maybe topper wasn’t home.
“how was practice?” you asked, setting your things down. he placed the plate on the coffee table and took a seat on the floor. you brushed your hair away from your face and sat down beside him.
“good. just ran some drills, normal practice stuff.” he shrugged, munching on a chip.
“is topper not home?” you set your books on the table and opened them up to where you had marked. rafe moved to grab his things from his bag sitting on the couch. he copied your actions and pulled out a pencil and a notebook.
“no, he went out with some of the guys for food.” he said easily, opening to a blank page. you watched curiously as he wrote down the topic he was studying for.
both of you fell into a silence as you started to read from your books. you were worried about it being a strange silence, knowing what happened the last time you were in this room. it was fairly difficult to push it out of your mind and to focus when rafe was right next to you, so close, along with the thoughts and memory of his touch. you pushed everything out of your head and concentrated back on the page you were reading from.
it wasn’t long when rafe’s hand appeared on your bent leg. they were crossed under you and he had placed his hand like it belonged over the side of your knee. you looked at him in your peripheral but didn’t see him look up once to acknowledge that he had in fact done that. instead you let it happen, ignoring the way it warmed up your skin. you swallowed in anticipation of him interrupting your studying session to turn it into a quick make out session, but the longer the minutes passed the longer his hand stayed where it was. after a while, you forgot about it.
if you had taken one look at rafe, with no prior knowledge of him or of the way his hands felt on you, you would have never guessed that he becomes so engrossed in studying. for the whole two hours that you both spent together with your noses in textbooks, he hadn’t once started a conversation. he kept at reading and writing, jotting things down in his notebook, while you held your head above your own book and soaked up every last word. it was comforting knowing that. the plate had even emptied, mostly due to rafe’s insatiable appetite after practice. you weren’t that hungry from your sandwich earlier.
“okay, that’s it.” rafe said abruptly, causing you to look up as his hand left your knee. “my eyes are going to bleed if i read anymore.”
you laughed lightly and looked back at your book. “are you sure you studied enough?”
“i wrote a whole ten pages worth of notes.” he flipped through them, the pages brushing together.
you hummed, still engrossed in your text. rafe shuffled next to you, dropping his notebook over the open pages along with his pencil. he let out a long sigh which turned into a yawn.
“are you done?” he asked innocently, his head appearing on your shoulder.
you glanced at him and shrugged him off with a smile. “maybe.”
“come on,” he groaned and reached for your textbook. you automatically smacked his hand away. he laughed and quickly flipped it closed and took ahold of your chin to face him.
“that was a dick move.” you said, punching him softly on the arm.
“pay attention to me.” he whined, letting go of your chin only to touch your cheek.
you eyed him as he came closer, finally kissing you when you didn’t punch him again or push him away. you kissed him back as best you could with the speculation seeping into your brain then. rafe seemed to be able to tell.
“what is it?” he asked when he pulled away, running his thumb lightly along your cheekbone. it was reassuring almost.
you looked at him, trying to think of the best way to phrase it. you also thought about how badly it could go given the answer you were dreading. “i'm just— it’s nothing.” you shook your head quickly and leaned in to distract him with another kiss.
he reciprocated for only a moment. “what is it? you can tell me.”
“i guess i'm just wondering what we’re doing.” you rolled your shoulder as if you had a knot, pulling away from rafe in case he didn’t want to touch you. his hand fell from your face and he leaned his side against the couch.
“what do you want to do?”
you gave him a serious glare. “don’t make this a game, rafe. i'm just…wondering what your intentions are.”
rafe adjusted his posture and sat up straighter, all his attention on you. his eyebrows creased and you bit the inside of your lip self-consciously, knowing this wasn’t going to go how you wanted it.
“well, i'm enjoying spending time with you.”
“studying?” you asked with a monotone.
rafe glanced away from you as if he were wondering if he said the wrong thing. “yeah. is that so hard to believe?”
you wanted to huff again, but you held the breath in. your shoulders started to tense as you became frustrated. not because of him, mostly because of yourself for not being able to communicate. you felt stupid for asking it, but you did. “do you like kissing me?”
“of course i do.”
“is that all you want to do?” you finally asked, quickly looking away from him. you reached toward your textbook, fiddling with the pages.
“no,” rafe said. “i want to get to know you.”
it was hard for you not to roll your eyes. rafe noticed and a second later his hand touched your shoulder, gently shaking it.
“i'm serious. hey, look at me.” he pleaded, and you did. “i want to get to know you, but only if you’ll let me. i know the other night was weird and i don’t know— spontaneous, but i enjoyed it and i enjoy being around you. you’re not the only one who’s been thinking about it.”
“i’ve probably been thinking about it more than you.” you chided in a quiet voice, trying to tease him. you were pleased by the answer he gave you and you felt a little silly for being so stubborn at first.
rafe smiled slightly, eyes soft. “let’s just keep doing what we’re doing and see where it goes, okay?”
you took a deep breath in, pushing your book away and nodding. “okay.”
rafe’s hand rubbed your shoulder comfortingly before he pulled you in for an awkwardly placed hug. the side of your body fell into his chest, but he hugged you, nonetheless, pressing a quick kiss to the crown of your head. you turned into him and smiled widely, your cheeks strained to hold it, and hugged him around the shoulders.
all the time spent worrying about whether he reciprocated your feelings or thoughts were so obviously wasted as you spent the rest of the night together. you took it slow, never straying from innocent kisses as you curled up together to watch a movie. you couldn’t help grinning multiple times throughout the night, knowing that things wouldn’t be difficult like you thought. it was easy when you expressed yourself and talked things over, even mentioning small things made a difference. maybe this would turn out to be another smart decision. you had a feeling there were plenty of possibilities with rafe cameron, but only time would tell.
624 notes · View notes
gisachi · 3 years
Note
Hi ^^ I know that your requests are now closed but I was thinking that, given you have written jealous Shinichi, I would very much enjoy some jealous Ran! Maybe you can mix it with one of the prompts? Just throwing the idea out there, no pressure. Delete this if you don't feel like it, it's okay really. Thank you for writing these amazing fics, the shinran fandom is in your debt. ❤️
So this is the last (!!!) and longest (!!!) of the kiss prompts, and I dedicate it to multiple-requests Anon and to this Anon. I hope both of you still see this. It took me a while. ^^;;
P.S. Special thanks to @artycreaty for keeping this in check. You are awesome. 🥰
41. Kisses shared under an umbrella. 46. A lingering kiss before a long trip apart. (6,489 words)
.
.
.
Ran keeps telling herself she has no right to be jealous.
She has hundreds of reasons not to. They’re merely childhood best friends. Life would be much easier if she didn’t involve herself in his business twenty-four seven. Shinichi absolutely doesn’t look at her that way. And so forth.
She wonders why they’re even friends in the first place. If their parents hadn’t enrolled them in the same kindergarten, she was certain they wouldn’t even be on speaking terms. He lives in a world of grisly books and crimes, she in a world of martial and visual arts. Their hobbies don’t overlap. They excel in different fields. They enter the same university with completely unrelated majors. The only bond they have in common is their shared history. Literally bonded since they were four, until now at nineteen.
So when she sees him all jolly around his newfound circle who hold the same interest in Holmes or detective work, it shouldn’t surprise her as much. It’s part of university life, it’s normal, they expand their horizons, and Ran understands that it hits much differently when they bond with people who like the same stuff they do. Something she’s aware they cannot share a hundred percent.
She’s proud of him, and she absolutely has no right to feel jealous, especially when she sees him around taller, prettier, more interesting women from his course block. There is no reason for her to look away with a heavy weight in her chest everytime the women get giggly and touchy while he’s absorbed in narrating his stories.
Everytime she does, she reminds herself of how he didn’t seem to mind when she was casted as the protagonist of their high school play and the leading man was the handsome Araide-sensei. Or how he simply shrugged when she fawned over the brother of a classmate because he looked so much like the karate senpai she was crushing on. Or when she secretly caught Sonoko dragging the detective behind gym after P.E. to confront him about his opinion regarding an upperclassman courting Ran and his only response was, ‘She can like whoever she likes, Sonoko. I’m not her boyfriend.’
He never showed her any sign of jealousy, therefore he must not be into her. Simple as that. So it’s unfair for her to be treating him differently. Getting snarky just because he received sixteen new fan mails again, more now that they’re in uni, and two even coming from the popular criminology seniors he is often teased to? Or ignoring him unprecedentedly just because his eyes followed the back of a woman with long chestnut hair and voluptuous curves? There are plenty of fish in the sea, and he’s bound to be attracted to someone else. This is a pill she ought to learn to swallow eventually.
Eventually.
“Shinichi-kun, you never told us about your scariest case yet, tell us about it?”
Kaori closes her notes and so do the other two girls across her, and Shinichi’s eyes twinkle. He truly seems to enjoy study sessions with the little group they made consisting of some of his and Ran’s coursemates because they love listening to his stories.
“At the top of my head is this murderer disguised as a bandaged man, and he targeted us one by one…” and so the detective drones. Ran pauses typing and reminisces quietly. Ah, that one from summer three years ago. I was almost injured by that crazy man during my sleep but Shinichi woke me up in time.
“Ran-san,” Shun, her friend and coursemate, mutters beside her, also stopping his typing to listen to the detective’s story. “It’s ridiculous how popular Kudou-kun is with the girls. He’s full of wild adventures.”
“Yes, he is,” Ran says, smiling. “He’s been a girl magnet ever since high school.”
She watches as Kaori inches closer to Shinichi, listening attentively, chin on her palm and flirtatious smile on her lips as the detective rants on and on.
For the third time that afternoon, Ran looks away.
.
.
Ran keeps telling herself she has no right to be jealous.
She does, everyday, but it’s hard when he smiles at her, cares for her, holds her in a way she’s never seen him do for anyone else. It gives her hope every time the girls cling to him but he never touches them back, whereas he automatically slings his arm over her shoulder because she’s afraid or cold or he simply feels like it.
Then again, maybe she’s giving herself too much credit. Perhaps it’s a free pass for being around him for too long. She even gets to spend time with him during weekends and holidays. It isn’t special because it’s normal.
And that’s all she’ll ever be, a normal girl in his eyes.
“Ran? She’s pretty special.”
Ran reacts to the mention of her name and catches Shinichi looking at her. “She appears quiet but she can kick anyone’s ass without breaking a sweat. It’s bad if you cross her,” Shinichi gloats with a grin.
“Oh my god, really? We can bring her with us then!” Kaori claps her hands in excitement.
“Ah... But she won’t like that,” he follows up, wary. Ran has missed the topic they were talking about and now she’s curious.
“But ghosts aren’t real and Mouri-san can give them a good beating!”
“Gh-Ghosts?” The color in her cheeks drains, eyes freezing at Shinichi who has probably already expected that reaction, for he sports that same look of concern as those times he had expressed whenever she joined him in his way-past-bedtime elementary school adventures.
“We’ll investigate an abandoned house I always pass by walking home,” Kaori explains. “Last night I saw a faint cigarette light at the second floor window. It might be a fugitive or a homeless person or a ghost, who knows?”
“You don’t need to come if you don’t want to, Ran,” Shinichi assures.
Gulping, Ran contemplates whether going with them will do her any good. It’s a nice change, it’s been a while since she last tagged with Shinichi in his cases. But she isn’t exactly proud of shrieking like a little kid in front of serious criminology majors who may feel like she’ll drag their covert investigation down if she joins.
“...I’ll pass,” she answers meekly, and his coursemates sulk except Shinichi, who offers her a smile of understanding.
“Man, I thought we’ll be able to see Mouri-san in action!”
“That’s ok, maybe next time. We still have Shinichi-kun!”
“Shinichi-kun will protect us, ne?”
“Hah. Right. Invite Hakuba too, use him.”
“Oh c’mooon, Shinichi-kun!”
Ran closes her eyes, struggling to zone their voices out.
In her silence, Ran ponders if she has made a wrong choice.
.
.
Ran has no right to be jealous. So it’s unfair for her to be treating him this way.
The following weekend, Shinichi narrates what happened in their late-night investigation. Hakuba wasn’t there so Shinichi was the only available guy as usual. Ran refuses to hear any more details, both of the haunted house and secretly of the girls chancing onto him during the investigation. Shinichi is puzzled.
“Did I do something wrong?”
“Nah, just swamped with work.”
“On a Sunday?”
“Yes.”
“Want me to assist?”
“No.”
Her replies are curt from the couch of his house, not looking at Shinichi on the other end as she mindlessly cleans up her digital sketches. She hates how snappy she sounds but her brain is too absorbed with conjuring spiteful imaginations to even think of masking her annoyance.
“Ran, hey. Look at me.”
His low voice freezes her from drawing, and she slowly looks up to meet Shinichi’s serious eyes.
When this happens, she knows he’s reading her. She inwardly chants a prayer because now isn’t a good time. Whatever time isn’t a good time. She doesn’t know what to say when she’s aware everything she’s been feeling is irrational and unfair. She’s being selfish.
“You’re… stressed.”
“No, I’m… Eh?”
He scoots closer, an arm’s length away. “Your dark circles are more prominent now, you need a break.” His eyes turn a soft blue. “Let’s have dinner out? My treat.”
Ran is surprised, to say the least. The last time he invited her out was two weeks ago. She’s become so used to seeing him around others that any initiative from him sounds too good to be true.
“But I need to finish this project by tonight.”
“Let’s have food delivery then!” Shinichi announces, not rattled by Ran’s indirect refusal. “I know exactly what you want. Ramen and shaved ice.”
Her eyes thin at the absurdly goofy expression she knows he makes when he’s being mischievous. “Clearly you’re ordering that ramen for yourself. I only like shaved ice.”
“Damn! Miss Detective gets it.” A mile-wide grin stretches across his face, earning an eye roll from the half-smiling woman. “Let’s eat together on your short break, please?”
He leans within a respectful distance and she sees his smile better, pair of kind eyes locking with her overworked ones. “It’s been a while.”
Her heart throbs for him. So much.
She caves - of course she does - and breathes her acquiescence.
After two long weeks, they have dinner together, just them and Shinichi’s ramen and Ran’s donburi and shaved ice, Shinichi taking a spoonful of dessert from the cup when she isn’t looking and Ran snatching a slurp from his take-out bowl and laughing when he catches her.
With how heartfelt his laughter is in her presence devoid of any mysteries, Ran knows she’s probably giving herself too much credit, but for once she wants to believe she is the cause of why Shinichi’s happy.
Just for that night, she gives it to herself.
She’ll change the dark colors of her digital artwork to brighter ones after they eat.
.
.
Despite everything, Ran finds it difficult to contain her recurring jealousy.
The more she shares precious time with him, the more it gets harder to suppress the selfish emotions. What is so unsatisfying about being the best friend is that she is only the best friend. No more no less. At the end of the day, she isn’t the one he gets to cuddle with, to tease then kiss, to tell ‘I love you’ to, romantically.
“I love you.”
Ran feels her heart about to leap out of her chest.
“But please. Stop. Tearing. The. Cushions!”
The little furball he has scooped underneath a throw pillow wiggle from his grasp. The kitten and detective engage in a brief staring showdown before it jumps away to hide under a farther couch.
Snapping out of reverie, Ran watches her childhood friend slink dejectedly onto the partly scratched furniture. He’s fortunate enough that his mother isn’t around to give him a long lecture on Why Pets Aren’t Allowed in the House 101. She can always take Yukiko-san’s role and reprimand him for it, but as for this and the cat, she finds herself not wanting to intervene.
“Kaori-san sure is taking her time with her parent’s permission. By the time she does, Momo would’ve shredded all the pillows in this house.”
“You named the cat?” Ran asks, amused.
“She did.” He thinks for a moment, then sniggers. “Actually I did. I suggested a random name. She took it.”
Ran merely hums. What can she say? They’re getting close. Close enough to team up as parents to an adopted kitten.
“I’m surprised you also agreed to keep Momo when you never took in animals before.”
“Kaori said she’ll treat me to the latest Detective Samonji movie this weekend if I do. Can’t resist that.”
“Just you two?”
“Yeah.”
A beat. Then he turns to her.
“Wanna join? I can ask her to count you in since you’re kinda helpi—”
“N-no need,” Ran quips, “It’s—It’s fine.”
“No really,” Shinichi insists, “Kaori-san has a lot of money, she—”
“I’m going to Tokyo Metropolitan Art Museum with Shun-san this weekend... so... I can’t.”
“Ah.”
Silence.
“It’s, um, for a project,” she bolsters.
“I know.” The faintest smile graces his lips. “It’s your thing. Both of you.”
“Mm.”
He doesn’t say anything else after that.
“Shinichi, you’re a detective, right?” she blurts out of the blue.
“Yeah...and?”
Then deduce what I feel. Here and now.
“Then you’re going to enjoy that movie!” Ran forces a beam, giving Shinichi a thumb of approval. “And you can discuss it with Kaori-san over dinner. I’m sure you two have a lot to say about it.”
Shinichi’s eyes linger on her, reading her like a book, and Ran has her mind reeling again, afraid to be read.
“Yeah, we do,” he finally says, ending the conversation.
Only a few words are uttered the rest of the afternoon.
Momo resurfaces and curls beside Shinichi.
Momo’s purring is loud, but Ran’s shattering heart is louder.
.
.
Ran must not feel jealous. She is not a girlfriend.
Because she isn’t a girlfriend, he’s free to fall for and date anyone else. Who is she to gatekeep him? There are plenty of fish in the sea, and he’s one big catch. Ran believes she’s a big catch, too. With the way she loves dearly, her future boyfriend is going to be very lucky.
Her future boyfriend is not going to be him.
“...mber the required fieldwork in one of my majors I told you? We actually go by batches. The first batch did theirs last month. The second batch was last week… and I— Ran, are you listening?”
“Ah! Yes,” Ran notices they have already reached her station and are now walking two blocks to her apartment. “Your fieldwork, right?”
“...Yeah,” he carries on. “I’m in the last batch... This whole winter break.”
“I see, I understand.” She smiles, getting what he means. No Christmas or New Year’s Eve together. The first time since they’re four. It’s fine, honestly. If it’s a required activity, then there’s really no way to go about it. She isn’t going to lash out just because she can’t be with him in her most favorite time of the year.
“And Hattori-kun and Hakuba-kun will be with you?”
“Hattori did his last month. Hakuba is in the previous batch. I’ll be stuck with the girls.”
Ran’s heart momentarily squeezes. “Where will your fieldwork be?”
“In Akita.”
Her pupils constrict. “That far?”
“Yes... so to cut on expenses, Kaori-san offered her house for me and the others to stay while we’re there—”
Kaori. Again with the tall, beautiful, intelligent Kaori. She bets it’s amazing to spend the holidays doing what he loves and with Kaori beside her, snuggling with him by the fireplace in a romantic snowy night and she might even confess, and it’ll be a great catch for Shinichi, and he’ll return with a girlfriend, and—
“Kaori-san is lucky.” The words flow out of her mouth, unbridled.
Shinichi looks at her. “Lucky?”
Ran remains quiet and keeps walking. It’s dangerous to say anything. She only has one thing in her mind and she doesn’t want to say it out loud. She has no right.
“Ran, hey.”
She doesn’t stop walking.
“Ran.”
She ignores his call.
“Ran… you’re jealous.”
She stops walking.
“Excuse me?”
“...You’re jealous…” Shinichi repeats quietly.
A contrast to his calm tone, his irises beset hers in the cold twilight and Ran attempts to shield herself but her bag and umbrella are in the way. She thinks of turning away but her feet are frigid like icicles, and Shinichi steps closer.
For the third time, he declares, “You’re jealous.”
Hearing her thoughts echo through his words renders her speechless.
It seems to take a moment before Shinichi’s brow arches, lips curl up as his eyes refuse to stray, and she hears a faint exhale even, like he’s exasperated, and suddenly he’s smiling - or is he smirking? sneering? - and...and...
It stings, is her immediate reaction.
For the longest time, she’d wanted him to take a hint. But if she had known this was how he’d react, she’d rather live a life having him oblivious of her emotional struggle. Dealing with that is more tolerable than witnessing him gaze her down in blatant mockery. He sneers as though he’s about to crack a joke and move on and forget such a laughable matter. That’s the last form of acknowledgment she wants for her honest feelings.
Heartbreak and shame and pain build up in her chest like a volcano closing eruption. Water begins to cloud her vision. She clenches her fist tight on her umbrella and Shinichi notices, and he takes another step forward.
“Ran…?”
“I am not, and you’re a fool.”
In a span of a breath, she’s sprinting in the opposite direction, tracing the path where they have walked, ignoring the distant yells of her name behind her. She runs and runs, and as she runs farther, with her thoughts muddy and breath short and dry, she wonders if she may have overreacted.
If he’s done that on purpose, screw him. If not, screw her.
After all, they are merely friends and she has no logical reason to act this way.
“Stop... running... will you!”
She hears heavy footsteps close in. It takes all the energy Ran has to prevent herself from turning her body around but his strong grip overpowers her.
“Let me go!”
“Why are you running?!”
“I can’t...deal with you!”
“Why? Was I right?”
“Right or wrong, it doesn’t matter!”
“Why doesn’t it matter?”
“Because I am your best friend!”
On another occasion, she would’ve successfully jilted away and run farther, but Ran is floored when he yanks her into a one-armed hug, so floored she drops her umbrella to the snowy ground.
“Stop saying that!” he hisses in her ear, frustration apparent.
“What are you— Let me go!”
He hugs her tighter.
“If you don’t let go in three seconds, I will screa—”
“I am happy!”
Ran stops struggling, eyes widening in shock.
Icy huffs tickle her neck as he half shouts, “I’m happy you feel that way!”
“You’re...You’re happy because I’m suffering?”
“What? No! I—”
“Is that supposed to make me feel better? How?” The hurt in her tone is impeccable, prattling muffled against his chest as she spares him no moment to butt in. “You think I wanted to feel this? That I enjoy griping in helpless jealousy? And you’re rejoicing that I am? How full of yourself can you be?!”
“That’s not...You don’t underst—”
“I do understand! I understand that I am so incredibly stupid for catching this disgusting heap of emotions for an obnoxious, stuck-up deduction maniac that is my best friend and maybe it’s better after all that he never, ever sees me the way I see him!”
“Stop saying that, Ran!”
She thinks he has broken away, but he drags her back with an insistent tug, crashing his lips onto hers as she stumbles into his arms.
All willpower rippling through her disintegrates quickly like snow in high heat.
An impatient pop resonates as he separates, eyes slowly opening, breath thick and ragged.
“I know that is not how we explain things, but does that explain anything?”
She hears it. The madness. But more than madness, yearning bleeds through his voice so much that her frustration turns into physical pain. Blinded by an all-consuming ache, she tips her chin and presses her lips back against his, demanding for cure in the wrong place. Shinichi freezes, then relaxes. He moves his hand to her nape, four fingers in her hair, thumb treading her jaw.
They look like a scene in a movie.
Under his umbrella and hidden from view, they communicate through brushing lips and tilting heads. His mouth closing over hers with gentle force, her hands splaying across his chest, heavy with something that makes his heart pound under them.
She is so lost in the chase and his tender embrace that for a second she forgets she is kissing her best friend.
Best friend.
This doesn’t explain anything. It worsens it.
She pulls back, ending what she has so recklessly started. “N-no, I’m— No.”
She pushes him away, gathers the stuff she drops, and runs without looking back.
“Ran!”
He shouts her name. Twice.
On the third call, his footfalls die down. On the fourth, he stops running.
She doesn’t.
.
.
Thirty minutes before midnight, Ran stands outside his gate, boots buried half foot under the snow as she rings his intercom for the second time, thinking to herself how foolish she must be to cut communications with him for a week and then show up his doorstep looking miserable like a stood-up date.
It’s the start of winter break.
He’ll leave for Akita in ten hours.
She needs to give his Christmas present before his departure.
She’s crazy, pathetic, still frustrated, and hurtfully in love.
“Oi. You better have a good explanation for why you’re buzzing at goddamn midnig—”
“Shinichi.”
His surprised gasp is apparent even through the intercom. A rustle follows and with a croaky voice, he responds. “...Ran.”
Surely he isn’t expecting this. Not after the tantrum she threw days ago. He probably thinks she hates him more than ever. But what she truly feels is more overwhelming than all negative emotions combined, and may god grant her all the strength to address it all, tonight.
“May I come in?”
“The house is—The house is a mess I, um. I’m packing my stuff for...”
“I’ll help you.”
“...”
She’ll understand if he decides to turn her down. But the answer that follows the deafening pause is a low and quiet ‘Okay’.
Despite psyching herself hours before she came, courage wanes when he opens the front door and gate in his pullovers. She is welcomed in, and the trip up his room is wordless. Shinichi only talks when he points out that he’s already packed clothes for two days and will need help for two weeks’ worth. He lamely laughs when he instructs her to pick the tops and layers, and he’ll take care of the pants and underwear.
On a normal instance, she would’ve humored him and they would’ve been talking right after. Now she simply pulls an empty smile and then they fall back into silence.
She supposes he’s trying to act unbothered, to treat what happened a week ago as a one-and-done glitch in their friendship, never to be discussed again. She cannot fault him when she’s trying to do the same. But it’s not easy when in the stillness of the night the echo of their altercation howls, raging persistently in their ears.
What has he been thinking of for the past week?
Has he been kept up all night by the words she said and the words he left unspoken?
Are they still friends? Will they still be friends after this?
The kiss... What about the kiss?
So many questions. So little words. So little time.
Ran is seated on the floor, folding shirts and stuffing them neatly in his duffel bag. Her back faces Shinichi who is sorting out bottoms in his cabinet. She senses him sit on the floor, back against her but not touching. Neither dares to speak first.
A ringing phone cuts the silence.
“Mm, still awake. Good for two weeks right? Gotcha. No, I’ll meet you girls at the station, no need to fetch me. Pfft. I can walk. Ok, see you tomorrow.”
If Ran wasn’t so hyperaware of where she is and what she’s done, her mood would’ve shifted to the one she’d been trying to avoid. Now isn’t the time to think about that. Midnight sneaking out to go to his house is something she wouldn’t do even on good days. She scans her bag on the far couch, deliberately bringing a bigger one to hide his gift. Maybe she can just sneak it in his bag and leave once she’s done and he’ll discover it only when he’s prefectures away. Brown has always suited him, and he’ll definitely find the overcoat useful as spare protective gear.
That’s right. She always cares for him like this. She is his best friend first, and... and nothing second.
“Don’t just leave after putting your present in my bag. At this hour, I can’t let you walk home alone,” he says swiftly.
Ran’s eyes fly wide.
“How did you…”
He doesn’t say anything and continues with his business.
Again with the throat-drying silence.
Something in Ran’s gut compels her to speak, but she is surprised when he does first.
“I... I don’t like Kaori-san. If that’s what you’re thinking.”
Ran stiffens, pausing mid-motion from folding. “I’m not…”
He leans his back completely against her and she shudders, voice reverberating through her skin. “Ran, if you could just hear me out.”
Unable to talk and move, she does.
“Kaori-san and the rest... They know I love mysteries. They know I want to build my own private detective agency. They know my favorite Holmes’ story is The Sign of Four. They know how many crimes I solved in Tokyo. All the information about me which anyone can read from the internet and newspaper and from what I told them when they ask, they know. Ran, you know all that. All that and more.”
He angles his head to the ceiling as if he’s talking to someone there. Ran supports his weight, curling to her knees as she silently listens.
“You know of my first ever deduction because Christ, my first deduction was about you. You know of the two cases which haunt me until this day because I watched the culprit die in front of my very eyes. You were with me the nights I locked myself in here thinking about them. You know of the interesting, the boring, the absurd cases, everything, because I told you or you were there. You know of the odd way I play the violin while I ponder over a case. You know I forget to eat when swamped with new books to read. I have three copies of The Sign of Four but the one I keep beside my bed and read almost weekly is the one you gave me on my tenth birthday and that is all I need. You know me for me, Ran. Everything about me that is off the record, the good and the bad, you know all of those. Only you. The same way I do... about you.”
She feels him crane slightly to the side, addressing her.
“Ran.”
“Mm.”
“I love you.”
Ran’s heart almost completely stops beating.
“I love you,” he whispers, “more than I am even supposed to.”
All words seem to have fizzled out of her vocabulary as she sits still, stunned at what she’s hearing.
“I’m happy growing up with you, studying with you, bickering with you, acting stupid with you, investigating with you, eating with you, napping with you, hugging you, holding you, taking care of you, simply... being with you. Before I know it, it’s not the cases or Holmes or mysteries that complete my days, it’s you.
“For you to keep repeating that ‘best friend’ phrase, I…” He lowers his head.
“For who knows how long, I’ve loved you as that and more.”
Someone pinch her because in no way can this be real.
“I was happy thinking you’re jealous because it meant a sliver of chance you feel the same way. We could’ve remedied the misunderstanding easily, Ran. We could’ve talked it over like we always do. But I was stupid and emotions were high and in the end I… kissed you…” he takes another deep breath, “But—but you kissed me back, and my heart couldn’t stay still...”
Pulse drumming loud, Ran tilts her head on the side where he leans, wanting to see the slightest expression he makes as he continues.
“If my deductions are wrong and you’re mad for a different reason, and—and you returned that for a different reason...” she hears the pang of remorse in his tone, “then please forget I ever said anything and I’ll leave myself to die in humiliation once I’m out of your sight.”
He lays one palm flat on the floor and she notices.
“But if my deductions are right and you were indeed jealous, I...” She feels his head swivel enough to feel his warm breath fan across her cheek, before shifting back front and releasing a slow, guttural exhale he’s kept contained within.
“I’ll wait... until you accept it. Accept me.”
Ran may have choked on her throat for how long she’s held her breath.
In spite of herself, she knows she doesn’t need to think of what to say. She had it all in her head before coming here. Yet expressing it out loud is a different matter.
She isn’t ready, but when will she ever be ready? Shinichi undoubtedly isn’t too. Yet here he is, laying the groundwork for her, no holds barred and a stuttering mess at that. How she plans to build from it is the question she asks herself next.
Inhaling as though bracing herself, she places a hand beside him, pinky slightly grazing his.
“I didn’t... You never showed any signs.”
Careful and calm, he extends his little finger over hers. She doesn’t flinch, and both hands crawl closer until two fingers overlap.
“Either I’m a great pretender or you’re incredibly dense.”
“I’m...I’m not dense.”
“I’m a bad actor, then.” He slides his hand further.
“I was trying so hard to be a supportive best friend for you.”
“I sensed that but ignored it because I didn’t want to assume anything.”
“You did though. Now we’re here.”
“Would you rather we aren’t?”
“I would rather we spend the last weeks of this year talking like normal than being stupid idiots before you leave.”
“It’s just two weeks, Ran.”
“Two special weeks I would’ve wanted to spend with my best frien-... with you.”
Without knowing it, his hand has completely nestled atop hers, four fingers curled between her thumb and index finger.
“Ran... You must really hate the idea of falling in love with me.”
“Eh?”
“You’re so wrapped with the thought that we’re simply best friends that you hold your love in chains as though it isn’t permitted to grow.”
“I… I didn’t want to ruin the only connection we have-”
“Two friends falling in love are still friends… They are also more. You cannot ruin an indefeasible connection. Friendship and love may be the only bond we have, but they’re the most important bond of all.”
Ran falls quiet.
“Geez…”
He releases a thick sigh, brushes his thumb across her splayed fingers.
“I have shit art appreciation skills, but I can take you to museums too... as a friend and as a date.” A beat, and a mumble. “Even to better museums than Tokyo Metropolitan Art Museum.”
She darts her head sideways, realizing something.
“Were you also…?”
“No.”
Ran doesn’t suppress the heartfelt giggle that bubbles out.
“Shun-san has a boyfriend, Shinichi.”
“I—” he pauses. “I wasn’t asking.” Ran giggles more.
“Shinichi.”
“Yes.”
“I love you too.”
The hand above squishes hers all too suddenly like he’s been blown away and is needing something to hold onto.
“I came here to give your present and to apologize for being so shallow and for acting without thinking and for a lot of things actually... but now I feel there’s no need, because then I wouldn’t have...” She looks down at their intertwined hands.
Before she can return his squeeze, he recoils.
“Oh, y-you do apologize. Running away like that.” He coughs, and she can practically hear the tripping in his tone.
“Aren’t you already used to it? I’ve done it many times,” she chides.
“No. Apologize,” he insists. “And look at me while you do.”
Ran’s stomach twists, heart kicking up a step.
It’s easy to talk without eye contact, but to be requested so after confessions are exchanged—
“Face me, Ran.”
The familiar voice of yearning strums her heartstrings, tone sounding a lot like a plea than an order and Ran finds her head instinctively craning at an angle, hand coiling on the floor trying to calm her nervous beating heart. She feels him shift behind as well.
She takes all her time to face him, partly unsure what to do, partly knowing exactly what she wants to do. Despite the deliberate slowness of their movements, it is when they lock eyes that time truly seems to stop.
Shinichi appears so different, so soulful. His blue irises glimmering, fixated on nothing but her as she reveres him with matching intensity. The same guy she treats as her best friend looks at her with tender love in his eyes, darting down her lips and up like no best friend ever would.
“I love you,” he says, breathless. “Make me your boyfriend.”
A wave of emotion sweeps over her, heartbeat fluttering in overdrive as they huddle on the floor, bags and clothes and time forgotten.
“From best friend to... such a shift-”
“Nothing will be different.” He rests his forehead on hers, gaze of soft blue patient though more intimate now, knowing what they share is mutual. “We’ll still do what we do... With exclusive romantic commitment and sweet nothings that translate to ‘I love you’ in more ways than one.”
She attempts a jab on his chest but he catches her fist, soft but jesting beam all too apparent and she does but play along.
“What about when we fight?” she asks.
“Same. But...” he slides a thumb over her quiet lips, parting them slightly, “I can do this once we make up.”
“...Like right now?”
“Like right now.”
A genuine smile is the last thing she sees before delicate pair of lips lands on hers, capping their one-week fight and their last night of the year together in the best and most unexpected way imaginable.
.
.
Ran keeps telling herself she shouldn’t be jealous.
Not because they are simply best friends, because they aren’t. Not because life would be easier if she didn’t involve herself in his business twenty-four seven, because it wouldn’t.
Not because Shinichi doesn’t look at her that way, because he does.
She shouldn’t be jealous because she absolutely has no reason to, is all.
“I haven’t forgotten about your present. I was planning to buy yours in Akita.”
“Stop lying, you totally forgot it.”
“I didn’t. Stop that.” Half-mast eyes rake her side profile, and Ran covers a mirthful grin with her mitted hand holding the umbrella, then yawns. Hours of packing and talking and laughing left them with roughly four hours of sleep. It isn’t like she slept the whole period because while sleeping in his room isn’t new, cuddling while they sleep is. Ran couldn’t simply shut her eyes and heart to that.
“I believe though,” he wraps a hand around her free one, pocketing both of them in his brand new overcoat, “I gave half of my present already.”
“Hnn. That doesn’t count as a gift.” Her hand shifted, coddling his own to a warm fit.
“Really?” A smug smirk pulls up his face. “I believe I am a nice present, Ran. That’s why they—”
“Screw this. You are unbelievable. A humbug. Why do people like you.”
“I know. Why do you like me?” Shinichi laughs as he avoids the swing of her umbrella.
From afar, they see Kaori and the girls at the meet-up point outside Tokyo Station, though they seem unaware of their presence yet. Suddenly feeling conscious, Ran feels the urge to disentangle her hand, but Shinichi holds on, firm.
“Why?” He asks in a low voice.
“I dunno… maybe this isn’t the best time…”
“Isn’t now the best time?” His smile is proud and natural, not one ounce of reluctance visible.
Although she gets what he means, that doesn’t free her of shyness and guilt. Somehow she feels like apologizing to Kaori for… she doesn’t know. She just wants to. Letting her see them like this makes her think that she’s giving her an indirect slap on the face. Shinichi certainly won’t agree because ‘What’s with women and their logic?’, but still, whether or not it’s all in her head, Ran needs more time to prepare for this.
But to her surprise, Shinichi lets go of her hand. They are still a few feet from view when he steps in front of her and turns around. “Maah, fine, I get it,” he huffs, then smiles. “Then, just give me your umbrella.”
The moment she does, Shinichi closes their distance and dips his face onto hers. Ran is given no leeway to gasp as loving lips seal her quiet. It isn’t as long as what they shared a week ago, but the emotions are loaded and full, speaking fond thanks and temporary farewell.
She doesn’t realize she has closed her eyes until he separates, and she’s met with the most tender, most angelic expression he wears only on the rarest occasions. He’s saying without telling that her feelings are valid, she doesn’t have to worry,  and he doesn’t have eyes for anyone but her. Somehow, the snow is the sea and fish are swarming around but neither cares because they have already caught each other.
“You don’t have to, silly.” Three layers of pink blanket Ran’s puffy cheeks.
“But I want to.” Grinning, Shinichi hands her back the umbrella. “You don’t like hand-holding. You don’t like being seen. Don’t you think that’s a great compromise?”
“Idiot, many people saw...”
“No, they didn’t!” Upping the duffel bag slung on his shoulder, he steps back and gives her one last goofy beam. “I’ll see you next year, Ran. I’ll call as often as I can.”
Wordlessly, Ran watches Shinichi’s back as he jogs to his waiting companions, who by then have already had their eyes pinned on the approaching figure.
“That is Shinichi-kun! ...And Mouri-san!”
“Ehhh!!?! You’re a thing!”
So much for being subtle, Ran flushes inwardly as she returns the wave the other girls are giving her. At that moment she really does feel immature for her past conduct. All of them are sweet. Even Kaori.
“I knew it Shinichi-kun! Mouri-san is sooo lucky, I’m so jealous!” Ran hears their banter and sees her jab his bicep before acknowledging her. “We’ll take care of him, Mouri-san!”
The Ran from one week ago would’ve had her heart crushed by such declaration, but now she’s nothing but pleased and the smile that forms across her lips is nothing but honest. “Make sure he doesn’t drag your group into a random dead body, Kaori-san!”
“Hey!” surfaces Shinichi’s shout amidst the mincing laughter of the group and the onlooking passers-by, and Ran bids her last wave before they enter the station.
Smiling to herself, Ran returns home, the lingering promise of his kiss committed to memory, knowing that she doesn’t have to get jealous because she has no reason to. Their indefeasible bond is all the assurance she needs.
.
.
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