Had these memes in mind for the past 2 months, so I hadda make 'em

my skin is marked and inperfect, my mind turns black and blue from my thought, the words that i speak lost in my throat, i write for myself, i care not if its dark inpropper and unladylike, the god apollo shined his light, apon my soul, now bountiful my fingers writing these words, you spared no help, so i have stopped asking, asuming i know all that you want cause its all that i know,

serving you to lessn your woe.

after i turned 17 or so i didnt have that many friends with common interests that would just go out like i always wanted to just hang out at the mall, get some food and stuff, but they wanted to smoke in the park and then go home. i still wanna hang out at the mall or go to a river and look for random shit in the mud but they want to go sit down for coffee for two hours or smthing. i just want to experience some stuff again, i only got a little taste of it a decade ago but that friend group fell apart very fast

i know photos and posts online arent always showing the whole thruth but it kinda hurts when i see people hang out and have fun and i dont get to have it and barely got to have it

the few times i actually hung out with people didnt always go as planned, i can think of only 2 times it was nice and i miss it dearly (even though both of those times i didnt get to talk much but thats the norm)

and also the fact i wont be a teen again and nobody my age here wants to do what i wanna do... and the answer "just ask people out yourself, dont wait" doesnt work here as i dont have a friend group in the first place

in high school i didnt have many friends and everyone moved and i only talk to one friend now

and in college it was just a shitshow, i made one friend who left and after that made no connections up until the very end of the last semester which was too late. best years wasted

i also dont get to hang out at other ppls places much but i get it that its mutual too? like i dont like calling people over but its always such a mess here and my bedroom is a no-go zone. absolutely not. but people dont seem to understand that i guess, so they just end up thinking i dont want them here... no, i would love to, but im ashamed of the state of this house

Using tumblr to share stuff about my life that literally no one cares about, but I just recovered from an emotional outburst, that in hindsight, is absolutely ridiculous but at the same time very sad.

I literally took one look at my lock screen today (5 minutes ago) because I went to check my messages and the second I took that look, I started bawling. Not because of my messages, oh no. I looked at this:

And I cried. I cried for five whole minutes.

I’ve been so wound up, anxious, fucking stressed and touch-starved lately that the thought of a man who I’ve only met once hugging me makes me crave the same goddamn hug RIGHT NOW. And I saw his face and I straight-up just bawled my eyes out and now I don’t know whether to laugh at how stupid that sounds or continue crying. I’m probably going to do the latter. I just need a hug, even a ‘hi’ would be enough. ‘How are you?’ THAT WOULD BE ENOUGH. Just someone who shows me love without even knowing me or what’s going on. A fucking ‘how are you?’ From a stranger goes a fucking long way, Charlie proved that because I felt so much fucking better that day. ‘Cause I’ve been lacking some real life love lately and I could really use some when I’m stressed, which I am. But no, here I am, writing angst and hurt/comfort with Matt Murdock to deal with my feelings because no one else in my close circle seems to give me comfort lately. That’s why I cried, probably, because I feel alone. Explains a lot.

So yeah, I’m not okay. Send help.

cursed construction core hi vis bra that came to me in a dream

In the dream I saw it in the window display of a hardware/DIY/trade shop, implying it was meant to be a practical garment designed for actual female constructions workers in a Female Armour level missed-the-brief attempt at gender inclusion

The practical support from the visible underwire combined with the hi vis implying it’s not meant to be worn as an undergarment, I just-

I blame my binge-reading ND Stevenson’s gender comics talking abt masculinity and femininity incl the one abt Victoria’s Secret lingerie yesterday for this monstrosity x’D

i love the animated version of marcille seeing a centipede and proceeding to flashbang her entire party about it

#i understood that reference

(part 2)

Snooork mimimimimi snooooooork mimimimimimi

Alright i think the coast is clear, kanako integrity duo GO‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

I think they’d have fun sharing a half melted amalgamate body and have riveting conversations

sometimes honestly if you're feeling invalid/anxious/any sort of negative feeling about your selfship , you just have to go back to canon. and i know it seems like such an easy answer but you really do have to. it is always SO comforting to me when i'm feeling bad about things to just see my f/os normally, without any fan interpretation or characterization or opportunities for jealousy involved; to remember why i fell in love with them and that no one can take that specific experience away from me. that other people's thoughts on the character don't matter because at the end of the day, none of it has any bearing on canon and no one can "know" a character any better than anyone else. it really really does work and i wish id realized it sooner

remembering how tubbo and cellbit being siblings was a pretty popular headcanon before bagi joined, and then people headcanoned the three of them as siblings. but i think that what we've ended up with is tubbo and bagi as siblings, removed from cellbit. i don't usually like to assign found family traditional family roles, but in this case, i think it being specifically a sibling role is important.

because bagi's spent so long chasing after a brother who doesn't want her. so she's gone "fine, then. i'll find myself one who does." and tubbo certainly wants her around! he doesn't mind her stealing from him. he chose her for his team the first time around, despite the one-sided tension they'd originally had.

she went to purgatory for her coach. she said she'd stick her hand in the fire for him. and they didn't win, but they get to walk out together, so i think bagi won, honestly. there's also the mutual bickering and the stealing, but that's part of it too. and there's so much mutual respect there as well.

anyway. i love seeing them hang out and i hope they hang out even more going forward, not just for themselves but also for sunny and empanada <3 because they're siblings too and i love them and i wish they got to see more of each other!

So I’m gonna say something crazy… but have you ever considered that maybe, just maybe… and hear me out… the core four group in the show about “outcasts and wierdos” ISN’T supposed to have a straight-white-able-bodied-all-american male that people from that group can easily project on to? That maybe the straight-white-male audience might have to contend with the fact that they find relatability in characters who are black, disabled, or gay? That MAYBE there isn’t supposed to be this pov character that easily fits into these conventions that they’ve been so used to seeing in popular media but that’s also kind of the point?

I made this a while ago and it was my first ever panel edit but it looks so crincjled idk what happened to him :(

Shang Qinghua really does think that he is unlovable huh

He really thinks that he is of no value to anyone if he isn't making himself useful he will be disposed off and that will be it

He genuinely believes no would ever want him so he manipulate and posture as a lesser so to be seen as a necessary annoyance rather than the pest he believes himself to be

He hates all the work he has to do but he prefers exhaustion to the paranoia and anxiety that eat him up when he isn't showcasing his value

He is in a constant battle just to be acceptable rather than loved so he can just be in the presence of those who are dear to him

Like damn like father like son I can see where binghe got all his issues like airplane bro stop unloading it all on your OCs look you gave the poor dear anxiety

There's something about like. A certain genre of posts / Online Opinions about insecurity/depression/misery/complaints that are so unhelpful that they wrap right around to being straight up hilarious. and it's the ones that are more or less written to the tone of "Feeling bad? That's gross!" Like, just so you know, don't voice your insecurities/ have low self esteem, because that's offputting! You're gross and weird. Don't be insecure about that, though. That would be stupid if you felt insecure about people disliking you for being insecure. Not attractive. You should be thinking about being as attractive as possible. You shouldn't make comments about suicide, even if you're suicidal! Keep those thoughts entirely to yourself. Make sure nobody around you knows you're thinking about this. It would Make Them Uncomfortable. It's better to keep these thoughts in your head where they can fester. Don't post OR talk to friends with complaints about you feeling miserable or depressed. Tbh people who are sad/upset a lot? Kinda a red flag! You are probably miserable because you're a bad person and you've brought this on yourself. If you don't have friends, it's because you're awful to be around. Easy! Solved the problem for you. And no, there is no nuance to this, got it? So, make sure to feel bad about feeling bad, but don't feel bad about it, because, well, that's just gross. And annoying! You might've wanted your brain rotted thoughts to be Peer Reviewed, you might have just needed to vent- you might've been hoping for some comfort, to get things off your chest. Well, don't! Don't talk about thoughts or feelings that are negative with your friends, you'd be burdening them and that's only meant for THERAPY. #SponsoredbyBetterHelp #MentalHealth like, DAMN. that's so helpful. you're so good at helping. I um really liked the part where these are all hard and fast rules that encourage keeping feelings bottled up and keeping your friends at arm's length. That's really funny of you.

for me, being non-sam aro isn't like. not being able to see the difference, or even not thinking the difference matters. for me it's like my romantic orientation is aro and my sexual orientation is... also aro. like i arguably do experience sexual attraction (which is why i sometimes call myself alloaro as well) but the way i experience it is so unconventional and so so influenced by my aromanticism that it doesn't really make sense to call myself ace or allo. which is why i'm just aro

"honey! she's hyperfixating again!"