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#makes so much sense lmfaoooo
beefstrugglenoff · 1 year
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as an american i truly deeply believe from the bottom of my heart that the reason none of us can come up with an insult about strayans that actually managed to pack any sort of punch is bc it is relatively common knowledge in the west that australia used to be a penal colony. and yall play it up, lean into it, wear your hick ingenuity and general bugfuckery on your sleeve even as you scoff patronizingly at some of the most dangerous and unique wildlife on the planet. but most americans are simply unaware that much in the same way the australian colonial project began as a place for imperialist britain's criminals to get banished to forever, the american colonial project began as a haven for britain's weirdest and niche-est pseudo-christian cults. and thats really our colonial heritage and legacy over here, its effect on literally every aspect of american life cannot be overstated. and most of us are walking around completely oblivious to that. so to me its sort of like if there were two clowns, right, and the first clown is acting like a normal clown, doing typical clown stuff. but the second clown is, like, sardonically mocking the first clown for looking and acting like a clown, in such a way as to suggest that he is completely unaware he is also wearing clown makeup and a costume and a rainbow wig and a red nose and big shoes
this actually. makes alot more sense. only recently learnt the reasons them first pilgrims made their way to the americas in the first place and yeah it tracks. god does it ever track.
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ashmp3 · 4 months
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friend called me psychopathic because i postpone things if i don't think i deserve them (higlights atm but i do it with even more mundane things like i wont pee or eat if the task isn't done) does anyone else do this i think its good way to discipline myself
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crowshoots · 2 months
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i'm struggling with exactly how to put this into words but i feel like whenever people engage with jesper, especially in a gang or criminal setting, one of the things they probably almost always have to look out for is the fact that jesper is so easily willing to reach for her gun. she has no qualms with putting it into action or using it as a threat. she uses her actively loaded and live gun to gesture and point to people sometimes. you always have to navigate or have counter measures for jesper because you know that she can do a lot of damage and a lot of damage fast.
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piplupod · 9 months
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hmmmmm. sorting through things in the brain and memories coming to the forefront from grade school and oooh boy i do not like that. things make so much sense but it doesnt paint a pretty picture!
#ignorance truly is bliss#just ... seeing patterns in the behaviour i exhibited and didnt remember exhibiting until recently#things I'd repressed A Lot so i didnt shrivel up and die from remembering it fhfkdl#nothing that was done to me mind u fhfkdl its all just things i did either in general or how i was unkind to others#bc i did not ... understand that ppl had thoughts and feelings until like... grade 5 🧍 what the fuck dude what happened there#and then in grade 6 or 7 i finally realized that reality exists & that everything i did was permanent and this was not a story i was reading#like. idk how to explain it. it was just straight up and down hardcore dissociation ig#very very very strong dissociation for years and years and years though. still ongoing but i remind myself more often that reality exists#still catch myself thinking that things cant happen bc it wouldnt make sense with ''the plot'' as if this is all a prewritten story lmfao#CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS IS MY THIRD TIME WRITING THIS POST BC THE OTHER TWO TIMES I OVERSHARED MORE LMFAOOOO#this is as good as i can do for not oversharing Toooo much djdkdl#anyways. I'll delete this tomorrow probably but WHAT THE FUCK MANNN WHY WAS I LIKE THAT AS A KID GODDAMN#constantly wondering what the fuck happened to me but i Dont Get To Know :o)))) those are locked behind a wall from me dbfjkdsl#shaking the bars of the cage bc i want to know i want to understand !!!! but also that would probably destroy me so... urrgh. frustrating#tfw u crave knowledge and understanding but cannot handle the terrifying mind melting truth of it all 😔#pippen needs 2nd breakfast
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cashmoneyyysstuff · 4 months
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hiii i love ur fics idk if ur requests are on rn but can u do a short drabble of the tiktok trend where the guy hasn't ask his gf to be his valentines day so she "put him on sale" as a joke ofc but she's like
BF FOR SALE ($3.50)
- amazing cook
-crusty feet
- will buy anything u want
any character is fine but i would love katsuki or shoto!!
LMFAOOOO this is for sure the funniest ask ive gotten yet😭😭😭 this is so cute !! and very long overdue I apologize writer block devil was rlly kickin my ass😞 valentines been over but yk i had to write this ! i was rlly hesitating between writing for shoto or katsuki and then i realized i could write for BOTH OF THEM!! and so i did ! i tried honoring your request as best i could, hope you like it <3 !
no pronouns mentioned, pure tooth rotting nasty fluff, use of petnames (my love for shoto and sweets, babe and idiot (lol) for katsuki), katsuki is an asshat but when isn’t he, shy katsuki, shoto is a bit of an airhead, kissing, biting, reader is petty asl lol, lemme know if i missed something else !
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todoroki shoto ♥︎
“yn, my love.”
“yes, shoto ?”
the corners of shoto’s mouth pull into a tiny frown at the usage of his first name. no baby, no hun, not even sho. just shoto.
“did i do something to upset you ?” he asks carefully from his spot at the foot of your dorm bed he seems to be stuck at, he can’t bring himself to move until he knows if you’re actually mad at him, and he has an inkling you are.
you look up at him for no longer than a second then look back down at your phone screen “what makes you think that ?” you question back nonchalantly.
“you posted something on your tiktok account..” shoto doesn’t have a clue how to have this conversation with you and it makes him a little nervous, he regrets not going to izuku for advice after all.
“mhmmmm~” you hum, urging him to continue knowing damn well you know what he’s going to say. you wanted to hear him say it himself.
you know shoto’s had no previous relationships before you so these type of things probably don’t mean as much to him as they do to you, but doesn’t everyone want their boyfriends to ask them to be their valentine ? you sure do, and your boyfriend hadn’t asked you to be his yet, so as petty as you know you were being at the time you posted the tiktok he’s no doubt here for right now.
shoto feels like a criminal on trial desperately trying to plead his case with you being the judge. tentatively, he asks “ you said you were..putting me up for sale ?”
immediately it’s like a switch had been flipped. you place your phone down onto your bed next to you, shoto wishes he could take your phone’s place. you cross your leg over the other and bring your hands together like a super villain revealing their master plan “yes. yes i did.”
“oh.”
silence. nothing.
shoto tried—he’s trying. he’s trying so insanely hard to make sense of everything that is you but he simply can’t. he breaks eye contact to think of more to ask but his attention is quickly pulled back to you when he hears you whine.
“uuuuughhh shotoooo~” you moan, throwing your head back against the headboard. “you’re not supposed to say ‘oh’ !” you’re face changes from grumpy to deadpan as you lower your voice slightly to try and mimic him. on any other day this would’ve made him laugh but he’s beyond lost at this point. he clears his throat before speaking again.
“ i don’t know what i’m supposed to say—or what i did for you to want to sell me.” he thinks “and for 3 dollars at that.”
you let out a laugh when you process his words and shoto’s shoulders magically feel lighter at the sound. carefully, he slides a little closer to the side of your bed so he can stand at your bedside. little by little. you pretend you don't notice.
"it's what you deserve for not askin' me to be your valentine."
the secret’s finally out and you get to see how the cog wheels in his head are starting to turn in real time, it has you holding back a giggle when he looks up at you like a deer in headlights.
“is that..why you were mad ?” you nod, humming out a playful mhmm
“ya really hurt my feelings you know ? to think my own boyfriend wouldn’t ask me” you clench your fist over your heart and fake sob dramatically.
shoto huffs out a laugh, relieved to see you’re not actually mad, and goes to sit down on your bed. he tentatively reaches for your hand and squeezes it twice when you let him hold it. before bringing it up to his lips and placing a sweet little kiss to it. it feels as if pop rocks are going off inside of you.
“ i’m sorry for not asking you to be my valentine.” he apologizes, his thumb absentmindedly rubbing your hand “ i was thinking i should’ve, but i didn’t want you to think it was weird since we’re already dating.” his thumb goes to run over your fingers “ i was worried me being too intense would scare you off.” he mumbles.
your eyebrows furrow, you lean towards him to make him look at you “ you wouldn’t scare me off, who told you that ?”
“kaminari. he said ‘coming on too strong scares away the babes.’ ” shoto quotes
you sigh. of course it was that bigmouth portable charger filling his head with this stuff.
you pull your hand out of his grasp and he looks up to protest but you grab his face in your hands before he can say anything, you can practically see him start melting at the contact as he blinks at you slowly, he reminds you of a cat.
“sho” you purr, rubbing his cheeks “ rule number one is never ever listening to kaminari’s dating advice. most of the time it is very wrong.” you explain.
shoto presses his mouth to the palm of your hand “yeah, i’m starting to regret that now.” he speaks into it, you snort. he leans in closer to press a sweet kiss to your lips and you reciprocate, pressing a few more kisses on his lips for good measure “ i’m really sorry for not asking you.” he says in between pecks. you hum in response to him placing even more kisses all around your face. “s’okay. i’m also kinda sorry for putting you up for sale.” you say, running your fingers through his hair while he places kisses on your shoulder.
he lifts his head up to look at you then, an eyebrow raised with an amused expression on his face “kinda sorry ?” he asks.
you nod “mhm. kinda sorry.”
he chuckles to himself, then gets up so he can climb into bed next to you. when he’s positioned how he likes it, with his head in your lap while you comb through his hair with your fingers, he sighs peacefully “well, it wasn’t all bad. i’m glad you think i’m a good cook.”
“what about the crusty feet ?”
“i’m choosing to ignore that part.” shoto smirks lightly to himself when he hears you laugh at his joke, clearly proud of himself for it. “and i will buy you anything you want, to make it up to you.”
“i don’t need you to buy me anything, sho” you roll your eyes with a lovesick smile “ all you gotta do is ask.”
he blinks up at you, looks off the the side as if he’s deep in thought, and suddenly gets off your lap to sit right in front of you. you never think you’ll get over how pretty your boyfriend is and being reminded of it with how close he is to you makes you flustered. he leans in to kiss you passionately and you don’t know if it’s the love he pours into it or the lack of air that has you so dizzy, you don’t dwell on it.
when he pulls away he’s looking at you like you hung up the stars in the sky and he simply, almost shyly smiles at you and asks.
“ will you be my valentine ?”
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bakugou katsuki ♥︎
you did not expect katsuki to come barging into your dorm room five minutes after you’d posted your tiktok. the loud sound of someone banging on your door and proceeding to let themselves in seconds later causes you to let out a squeak.
in comes katsuki, phone tightly clutched in his hand and the moment his eyes zeroed on you he’s like a bull charging at a red flag. he stands right in front of you, angry frown on display before he shoves his phone in your face.
“explain this. now.” he growls, you have to hold back a laugh, keeping your face as calm as possible you look between him, his screen then back at your phone.
“what’s confusing about it ? i thought i was being pretty straight forward.”
his eye twitches. “why the hell did you put me up for sale ?! and for three dollars and fifty fuckin’ cents ?!” he exclaims, you can’t help the snort that bursts out of you, though katsuki doesn’t look as amused as you are.
“explain.” he deadpans.
“i think you can figure it out.” you shrug back.
he mutters insults to himself that you can’t catch “well obviously fuckin’ not, cus I wouldn’t be askin’ you if i did.” you simply shrug and look back at your phone. “i wrote it in the caption.”
it takes him a second to process then he’s tapping his password and opening the clock app at super sonic speed. his eyebrows furrow and you see him tapping away at his phone. his eyes widen when he reads your caption and he looks down at you with a mix of desperation and disbelief.
“you’re mad cus I didn’t ask you to be my valentine ?” your bratty huff and turn to the side as you shrug again is all the answer he needs. he looks at you for about 5 seconds longer then sighs.
he sits down on your bed and keeps staring. katsuki bakugou hates a lot of things and one of those things is you ignoring him. a warm hand on your ankle startles you and you can’t even ask him what he’s doing before your being yanked towards him. you squeal, almost missing the smirk on his face or the huff of laughter at your reaction. almost though, so you glare at him. katsuki looms over you until your noses almost touch, then you turn away with a huff. he chuckles, pressing his lips to your neck.
“ yer such a baby, y’know that ?” he mumbles, smirking against you neck. you huff but make no effort to shrug him off “ no i’m not, jerk. is it so wrong for me to want my boyfriend to ask me to be his valentine’s ?” you grumble, trying to ignore the feel of his warm lips against your skin, it’s not working so well for you.
“s’not what i’m sayin, sweets” he nips at your earlobe “‘m sayin’ ya coulda just told me ‘stead of bein’ a baby about it.” you can’t tell if this is his way of trying to apologize. either way, you don’t want to give in just yet.
“i’m not supposed to tell you to ask me to be your valentine’s katsuki, that’s not the point~ !” you huff petulantly. you feel a but childish but, c’mon ! it’s a given to have your boyfriend as your valentine and it wouldn’t hurt your demon spawn of a boyfriend to be a little but romantic once in a while.
he playfully rolls his eyes at you “see, what’d i tell you? big baby.” leaning forward he nips at your nose making you groan and trying to push him away with your palm. katsuki being the powerhouse that he is, doesn’t budge. “ i didn’t think to ask ya cus you’re already mine. so why should i need to ask something that’s a given ?”
your heart beats faster at his words and katsuki takes his chance when he feels you loosing up more and more. suddenly he’s got your wrists in his grip, holding them above you and looking down at you with that sickeningly handsome smirk. you’re almost there, he can practically feel it.
“i—i’m..still mad at you” you stutter out weakly, your defenses are down.
“yeah ?” he taunts.
“yeah. apologize.”
he scoffs, rolling his eyes lightheartedly “why should i apologize ? you said my fuckin’ feet stink.”
“ ah, ah, ah.” you tut “don’t put words in my mouth, i said your feet were crusty.”
“yeah, thanks babe. that makes it so much better.” he sasses, you laugh “and i complimented you ! i said you were an amazing cook !”
“yeah but that ain’t a compliment, ‘ts a fact.” he says matter of factly, you’re eyes threaten to get stuck at the back of your skull with how hard you roll them and he snickers.
he dives in and steals a kiss, and then another one when you don’t stop him. when he pulls away to catch his breath, ready to steal another kiss you stop him by placing your hand on his chest. he looks down at you questioningly and you give him a raised brow in response. he groans.
“fine. m’sorry” he concedes quietly
“foooorrr ?” you urge.
he narrows his eyes at you as if saying “don’t push it” but swallows his words down “ for not askin’ you to be my valentine’s or whatever the fuck” he shoves his now hot face into your neck and mumbles “now quit bein’ all pissed at me.”
you’re happy enough with that, so you wrap your arms around his neck, one of your hands creeping up his nape and into his hair. he sighs contentedly, clearly enjoying the attention you’re giving him.
“thank you. i’m also sorry for saying you have crusty feet.” hearing him scoff at the accusation makes you giggle “and for putting you up for sale.” he hums, happy with your apology.
“..kinda.”
“oi.” he warns. you giggle in response continuing your ministrations in his hair.
“you still haven’t asked me so..” you trail off. he lifts his head up to look at you with a blond eyebrow raised.
“ does this valentine shit really matter that much to you ?” he asks.
you respond immediately “yes.” nodding aggressively to make your point.
he sighs, shaking his head. he looks at you, then looks off to the side in embarrassment, he can be so cute when he wants to be. steeling his nerves he looks you straight in the eyes. fearless with fierce red cheeks and all.
“b-be my valentine, idiot..”
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p1utofairy · 9 months
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PAC: “cause every little thing that we do, should be between me & you.” 🕯️💭✨
• what are your person’s dirty thoughts about you?
disclaimer ✩: 18+ mature themes. thank y'all for 1K omg <3 y’all really fw with lil ol’ me?! ily ily ily. 🥹 here’s a lil sumn sumn to celebrate. 🥂 p.s. take what resonates, leave what doesn’t. enjoy!
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pile 1 ⭐️ —
“you don't need me, please believe me. this ain't easy, you know i've been feindin'. let me unleash my demons on you.”
“innocent” is what i’m hearing pile 1. your person will underestimate just how much of a hold you have on them lol initially they’ll think that you’re more of the submissive type, but oh are they in for a treat! you hold your cards close to your chest, so it’ll surprise them when this other side of you comes to the surface. i’m hearing “classy in the streets but a freak in the sheets” LOLLL. oh i’m also picking up that some of you may be inexperienced (or may not have as much sexual experience as them) but it won’t come off that way to them...they’ll just think that you’re playing coy and teasing them. your person will be eye-fucking you a lot, i can see them sitting across from you just looking you up and down…locking in on your legs — they’ll really love your legs. “you’re just too good to be true, can’t take my eyes off of you. you’d be like heaven to touch.” just started playing in my mind. awww your person is very sensual 😩 and as much as they want to have you…they’ll be patient. they want to make sure you feel comfortable. all i need by lloyd just came to mind, “get up on it. i’m so horny and i want it. so get up on this, get up on the dick.” LMFAOOOO ik i said they'll be patient but i’m ngl they'll be internally tussling with themselves because they’re used to just getting what they want and people falling for them at the drop of a dime, but you make them work hard for it. i can see you two having a heavy make-out session before they drop you off home and then you pull away and you're like BYE 😘👋☺️ and they'll just be sitting there with their mind racing a mile per minute like FUCK?????? lmfaooooooooooo my gosh you will rile them up so bad pile 1. i feel like there will be a height difference between you two or an age gap. they could be older than you! you give them butterflies <3 they think they’re making you soo nervous/giddy inside (and they are) but you hide it a little better than they do. after every interaction with them you’ll feel all mushy inside hehe and you’ll be able to tell that you make them nervous. they’re just blown away by how beautiful, hot and how well-put together you are. i can see you talking and they’re just watching your mouth move like 👁️👁️ LMFAOOO bye pile 1. they’re feenin’ for you.
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pile 2 🪡 —
“i just wanna live in a fantasy. i think we deserve it, right? top all the memories. i’ve ever made in my life.”
oouu this is my pile that doesn't take shit from nobody, okayyyy! hi pile 2 welcome to your reading <3 i can already tell that your person loves how you carry yourself. you do not allow many people to have access to you, and when you do, people can’t help but feel special inside because you have such a ✨big✨ presence. you may not take your person very serious at first. they have youthful/playful energy while you have a very disciplined and mature demeanor. that’s what will make them so attracted to you; how you're always on your shit…there's no cutting corners with you, you do not have time for the games and they will respect that. there's something about your lips that they love. you might have a defined cupid’s bow like rihanna or maybe they just like how cute and soft they are; especially after they just got done kissing you. i see them teasing you and slightly biting your bottom lip after they pull away from the kiss 🥵 ugh don’t count them out pile 2. they might have youthful energy but they're a pro when it comes to seduction lol you both are similar in a sense — you both want something serious and passionate with a hint of playfulness. they'll loveeeee watching you get ready! like i can see you standing in front of a mirror, in a rush to make yourself look presentable and they're just laying back on the bed…giving you the look. just ready to POUNCE. whew pile 2! this person’s love language might also be physical touch, cause they’ll be fighting the urge to squeeze your ass or constantly have their hand on your lower back. you’ll secretly love all their physical affection though hehe.
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pile 3 🔪 —
“out of breath, take it slow. i wanna feel it in my soul. yeah, i know you love it when i’m on top. gotta keep it going, baby. don’t stop.”
heyyyy pile 3 🤗 i’m immediately hearing that you have a way with words. you know exactly what buttons to push to get your person aroused mhm! your person knows your worth just as much as you do, they’ll put you on a pedestal and treat you with so much care and devotion. they may have a worship kink? i see a bedroom setting — lightly-dimmed, candles lit, red rose petals on the floor and they’re slowly taking your shoes off for you…their hands trailing up your bare legs slowly 🥵 OKAYYYY pile 3! the sexual attraction is strong in this one wow. that scene from the wolf of wall street where naomi (margot robbie) and jordan (leo dicaprio) are on a date and naomi is giving him the fuck me eyes while saying “aren’t you married?” is coming to mind. now i don’t feel like there’s any third parties/cheating involved…you two just might be into role-playing. like i can see them booking a spontaneous getaway trip for the two of you & y’all just slut each other out and explore each other’s wildest fantasies the whole time 🤭 you both know how and what will make the other person tick; i can see them teasing you a lot in public. a lot of dirty talk in your ear, hand on the back of your neck gently squeezing and kisses. they were never really like this in their previous relationship(s) but you bring out a whole different side of them. agora hills by doja cat just started playing, “kissing and hope they caught us, whether they like or not. i wanna show you off. i wanna show you off.” THEY REALLY DO, PILE 3. they can't believe they bagged you…every-time they look at you they’re in awe.
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h4m1lt0ns · 10 months
Text
HEARTBREAK SYNDROME.
episode one :: SELFISH.
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ pairing ︴max verstappen x singer!y/n
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ genre ︴social media au / irl snippets
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ summary ﹔five years worth of love thrown away in the trash, all at y/n’s expense.
fc – wonyoung jang (aged up to 28)
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ warnings ﹕cheating, angst.
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[may, 15 2023]
y/n
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♡ liked by redbullracing, danielricciardo and 4,294,103 others.
y/n here’s to five years of u being fuckin annoying. i love you maximilian.
839,193 comments.
maxverstappen1 i love you so so much more
maxverstappen1 wait that’s not my name
→ username LMFAOOOO 😭
→ username PLSSSSS
username this is so cute i will cry
username very normal abt this. very.
username five years is long enough y/n you can come back home now 😍
username how much is her paying her bc HOW
redbullracing our favourite couple 😍💙
username i dont know man i still don’t like him
username parents 🗣
username mama y papa ong
username not my wife posting her man like
username they’re so goals 😩🤌🏻
username i want what u cunts have
username god me when 🧎🏽‍♀️
username a gf like y/n pretty pls 🙏🏻
username i want u so bad y/n it’s not even funny anymore
username praying to whatever fucking god max prayed to
username how did max bag you we’ll never know
username leave him for me bae i can drive and be dutch too 🤞🏽🤞🏽
username GIVE US Y/N BACK MAX 🔫
username y/n come over pls. and don’t bring him.
username five years later and i still don’t think he’s good enough for her
load more comments…
☆ IMESSAGE with ; honey badger
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honey badger: where are you
y/n: ???
y/n: in the studio rn, do u need anything?
honey badger: huh
honey badger: wait are you not coming?
honey badger: i thought we were doing
karaoke together ☹️
y/n: bro what are u talking about
y/n: come where? i already have plans tonight
honey badger: i’m ??
honey badger: hold on
y/n: …danny? 😀
honey badger: bro why aren’t you here
y/n: BROS NOT MAKING SENSE 🔥 🔥 🔥
honey badger: bae we’re all at the usual club
rn and i was wondering why you’re not here 😃
y/n:…
y/n: now who the fuck is we.
honey badger: 😭😭😭😭
honey badger: bro how do u not know
honey badger: didn’t max tell you? we’re supposed
to go out
honey badger: y/n?
y/n: wait
y/n: oh this motherfucker
honey badger: wait what
y/n: is max with you
honey badger: bestie i’m scared what’s going on
yn: we’ve been fighting recently
y/n: him and i are supposed to go out
for our anniversary and to talk things out
why the fuck is he at a fucking club
y/n: and he didn’t even fucking tell me
y/n: this the second year in a row what
the fuck is his fucking problem
honey badger: wOAHHHHHH
honey badger: HOLD ONNNN
honey badger: CALL ME RNNN
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☆ IMESSAGE with ; funeral guest list.
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honey badger removed maximilian!
honey badger: y/n pick up the phone
honey badger: come on please
chal eclair: y/n please answer the call
my baby lando: y/n please
alabono: i’m sorry we couldn’t stop him
chal eclair: ^^^
chili!: y/n come on now
chili!: y/n please answer the call amor
princess george: y/n we know it’s hard but we need to know if you’re okay
PIERRE GASLYYYY: we’re all worried y/n
PIERRE GASLYYYY: GUYS SHE ANSWERED KIKA’S CALL
chal eclair: i see how it is y/n 😐
my baby lando: mom do u not love me anymore
chili!: woooooowwwwww okay y/n
honey badger: all of you shut the fuck up
honey badger: pierre what’s kika saying
alabono: lily and carmen are on their way to you y/n
PIERRE GASLYYYY: she’s crying
PIERRE GASLYYYY: while cussing out max
PIERRE GASLYYYY: but crying hard
chili!: so y/n of her
my baby lando: real
yukino: i will run him over for you 💕
chal eclair: okay relax
chili!: true
my baby lando: yes but not now
honey badger: y/n say something
alabono: lily and carmen are with her now
alabono: she’s not okay guys 😕
yukino: what are they saying
alabono: she’s crying really hard and isn’t breathing well
my baby lando: WHAT ELSE
chal eclair: IS SHE SAFE
honey badger: DOES SHE NEED ANYTHING
chili!: alex i swear to god 😃
alabono: she’s safe and doesn’t need anything rn. lily and carmen are gonna sleep over w her, they won’t leave her alone
princess george: oh okay thank god
my baby lando: i blocked max but someone tell him it’s on fucking sight when i see him
chal eclair: i second that
yukino: count me in
PIERRE GASLYYYY: kika said we’re setting his house on fire
alabono: bringing the gas
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angelicdanvers · 5 months
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BREATHE DEEPER | four.
a charlie bushnell x fem!reader social media fic.
y/n
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liked by iamcharliebushnell, levizmiller, dior.n.goodjohn, and others
y/n — australia’s my new fav country
tagged | levizmiller
levizmiller i’m challenging you to another round of pool tonight ↳ y/n bet
iamcharliebushnell when’d you go to australia? 😭 ↳ y/n when u didn’t show up for acai bowls >:( ↳ iamcharliebushnell im sowwy ↳ y/n DONT YOU DARE ↳ iamcharliebushnell okok sorry but thought you'd be in london ↳ y/n soon, yeah :')
levizmiller y/n im gonna poke you ↳ y/n okayy hi ↳ levizmiller let’s get boba ↳ y/n YES
dior.n.goodjohn I MISS U COME BACK TO ME ↳ y/n once my australian chronicles are over i promise i will <3 ↳ dior.n.goodjohn WOOOO
walker.scobell youre pretty! ↳ y/n thanks lil dude!
i.am.andrewalvarez AUSSIEEE ↳ y/n THE SWEET ESCAPE FR
aryansimhadri DID YOU SEE KANGAROOS ↳ y/n NO NOT YET THOUGH I HOPE I DO
dailymail Y/n and Levi? ;)
user omg bf reveal happening??
user2 ive never held my breath this much
“GALILEO’S GALS” — 5 notifications!
chanel’s enemy Y/N
lee lee Y/N
dr dre why am i in this gc
chanel’s enemy because u are
lee lee we’re getting off topic Y/NNN CMERE
↳ hiiiii?
chanel’s enemy HIIII HRU ILY
↳ ILY TOO BAE IM GOOD WBU
chanel’s enemy WE GOOD WE HAVE SOME ?’s THO
↳ oh?
lee lee ARE YOU AND LEVI DATING
dr dre OHH THIS MAKES SENSE YEAH ARE YOU??
↳ nooooo
chanel’s enemy that’s a very interesting no
↳ we’re not but idk
chanel’s enemy what
lee lee girl wdym
↳ we’re not dating but i think he likes me? idk
dr dre do you like him back though???
↳ eh he’s very sweet but i’ve always seen him as a best friend, i don’t think we could be more
lee lee do you want to be more??
↳ i mean, i’d give him a chance if he asked? but it’s not anything i’m particularly into or wanting
chanel’s enemy okay that helps
↳ uhhh why
dr dre well if my sleepy ass remembers correctly, everyone and their mother are wondering if you’re dating
↳ nah that aint possible
lee lee it is, stupid dailymail picked up on it first 💀
↳ my manager’s asleep, no wonder she hasn’t updated me lol oh well idgaf they can think what they want
chanel’s enemy but even walker and charlie are 😭
↳ they’re gonna forget it in t-minus four secs it’s fine
dr dre whatever you say, ma’am but are you sure that ‘cryptic’ caption won’t cause any issues??
↳ uhh andrew you’re scaring me
dr dre what if someone likes you? like like-likes you and knows you and gets hella jealous or doubtful? and not saying charlie does but he was raving about how he might finally get to hang out with you, ONE ON ONE. what if he thinks he can't because he thinks you two are dating?
↳ bro first off ik you don’t like me, neither does aryan and i know its DEFINITELY not walker
lee lee girl he had a celeb crush on you a few years ago dont tell him i told u that
chanel’s enemy LMFAOOOO but no andrew has a point how come you didn’t mention charlie? ��
dr dre yeah i was just aboutta say 🤨 especially after my little analysis?
↳ SECONDLY, guys, charlie doesn’t. not one bit and that’s obvious, like he isn’t even in considerations. i understand what he may feel but he has nothing to worry about. he knows i won't ditch him or anything lol (right?) but if anything the only person that’d be a little confused or whatnot is william
chanel’s enemy WHAT?? AS IN WILLIAM FRANKLYN MILLER??
lee lee huh 😃
↳ we dated for a month back when we were 15 or so and realized we were way better off as friends
lee lee why ?
↳ idk i think i was just jealous of lily 😭 but anyways we’ve been just friends since and i’m completely happy with that. i don't see him romantically anymore, yeah he’s hot but like nah. but yeah if he was confused, it's probably because i was best friends with levi when we dated too and might question if he was the cause of our split?? AGAIN THATS IF HE OVERTHINKS IT
dr dre i feel like i’m reading an autobiographical analysis you definitely are fond towards “millers”
↳ ur welcome <333 and NO i am not
chanel’s enemy okok so we got several people who’d be jealous
↳ WHAT WDYM SEVERAL I ONLY LISTED ONE
lee lee ain’t no way you’re ignoring charlie
↳ DUDES I REALLY DONT THINK HE LIKES ME
dr dre but there could be a possibility? just don’t rule him out
↳ bro he doesn't like me 😭 but yeah trust me everything’s gonna be okay again i dont like anyone and no one likes me, and we'll make sure it's obvious i'm single in case anyone does though that may take a while... ANYWAYS
lee lee suuuuure you should hang out with charlie btw
↳ idk why but im scared to 😭
lee lee but you need to he misses you a lot yk
↳ doesn’t change the fact that im SCARED
lee lee WHY WOULD YOU BE SCARED ITS JUST CHARLIE
↳ IDK I JUST DONT WANNA SEEM STUPID OR UNATTRACTIVE AND SHIT
lee lee HE FLIRTS WITH YOU ALL THE TIME AND MESSES UP JUST AS MUCH, YOURE NOT THE EMBARRASSING ONE HERE
↳ DUDE I KNOW I CAN BE AND I DONT WANNA DRIVE HIM AWAY
dr dre sure you and levi hang out and are sweet and shit but BRO the teeth rotting sugar is you and charlie in your damn COMMENTS
↳ ITS NOT THAT BAD, IS IT?? 😭 GOD I HOPE CHARLIE DOESNT THINK OF ME ANY DIFFERENTLY
chanel’s enemy i think u like charlie, miss girl
↳ NO
dr dre nah, they’d be cute together, even charlie said so himself
chanel’s enemy you dumbass
dr dre uhhh ANYWAYS said too much im gonna sleep again love youse
lee lee BRO yeah night babes <3
chanel’s enemy LOVE U BAE GN
↳ what the duck STUPID AUTOCORRECT WHAT THE FUCK AINT NO WAY YALL JUST DIPPED fine ily guys too </3 BUT DONT THINK IM LETTING THAT GO EASILY ugh what do you guys mean 😭 aint no way thats true OKOK YK WHAT BYE!! FOR REAL THIS TIME
— taglist.
@shokocoded @istillremberthefirstfallofsnow @surftrips @svtsimp22 @gcidrvsh @idontevencare1223 @thames-fig @captainshischier @reggieslifeboat @multifandom-loser @wheelerslover @mermaid-mqtel @randomnpc456 @kaithoughs @isab3lita @mariposa555 @sunshinessky @myr-cheri @thedeadlynights @ella33 @c1nn4mng1rl @poppysrin @breadbrobin @lucy-the-ant @jules-loves-lukecastellan @taloulalila @tom-pls-fuck-me @mia-luvs @iknowyoureabigfan @rinisfruity14 @chasebeth @auttumnsayshi @prettygirlformula @alwayswndr @balletfilmss @kestisvrse @1forthemoney2forthekish @eissaaaa @emelia07 @toffytaste @soulaires @bearwon @happy-mushrooms @simrah1012 @blimp-blimp @obxstiles @yuminako @hopexcroc @mackycat11 @knowugetdejavu @0puddleofgender0
thank you so much for all your love and support, it really means the world to me. y/n's beginning to find out certain things, wonder where things will go from here 🤔
as always, i will continue updating the taglist :)
i love you and am so proud of you, stay safe and drink water <3
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moooncats · 4 months
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✿ Astrology Observations ✿
✿ Through the eye's of a Virgo 🧿 ✿
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✿ Sun in Aries ✿
Funny, Confident, Fighter lmaoo (don't talk ish about anyone they consider family cause they'll knuck and buck in 2.5 seconds bwahaha), Attractive!!! 🔥🔥 Aries are usually loud/opinionated and have this lets live life like its the last day we're alive. They are usually the ones who will dance like theres nobody watching hahah very tik tok star vibes. Go go go energy. You guys love to travel! ✈️ Its giving me Carmen Sandiego Vibes. ʕ→ᴥ←ʔ
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✿ Sun in Leo ✿
Popular (Irl & Online), Funny af never met a leo that wasn't good at jokes. Great hair/makeup/style �� oh and music taste gives me hype in the club vibes. Creative! Never met a leo that didnt dabble in the arts. Ya'll really love to spoil your love ones and friends and as a virgo I appreciate you! Seriously so sweet and caring. Gift giving is most likely your love language. (✿◠‿◠)♡ I would also like to add SOOO good at making food/pastries like this one leo friend I had would make flipping macarons in hs and they were BUSSIN BUSSIN. I also know its super hard to make them? Like sheeesh your creativity never fails to make a presence! Keep it up my lovely leos! ♡
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✿ Sun in Capricorn ✿
2-3 jobs lmfaoooo, boujee, yall are secretly freaky af!!! Most capricorns I know have only fans on the side yall aint fooling no one with that good girl fascade hehe do you tho! Make that money puuur. 💰💋 Homebodies unless they're out with their lover yall settle down QUICKKK bwahah. 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 It's giving me I'm busy at work and I'll get to you when I get to you vibes. 🫡 Also lets not forget most Capricorns I know are lowkey know it alls! Lmfao yall try to hide it but your expression gives it all away. There was this Capricorn that I could never beat at Skip Bo (a card game) she really knew the in's and out's of all numbers. ʕ→ᴥ←ʔ So quirky!
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✿ Sun in Taurus ✿
Grounded, Stable, FOODIES. If they cook or share food with you they really fucks with you. Can be stubborn but I think it's awesome they just know what they like and its usually of ✨️ higher taste✨️. IYKYK. Lover of art but usually natural art or anything natural. Anything to do with the 5 senses they are IN THERE LIKE SWIMWEAR. Homebodies af. Sleep is their go to de stresser with eating, skin care, spas, hikes, anything nature that looks beautiful lmao it's giving me ethereal fairy vibes. (๑ > ᴗ < ๑)
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✿ Sun in Scorpio ✿
Always needs to be the coolest person in the room, secretly wants to be loved but has high AF standards lol. Usually has lots of piercings/tattoos they LOVE to color their hair lmao. Probably can be the spoke person for Manic Panic or any other hair dye company. Scorpios can drag someone to filth and it always makes me laugh cause they're straight up and to the point with it. They don't just spend their time with anybody they're picky af. 🤷🏾‍♀️ Most scorpios I know are in the LGBTQ community. It's giving me I know I'm the prize and I'm cool as shit vibes. ʕ⊙ᴥ⊙ʔ
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✿ Sun in Cancer ✿
Loves to match vibes with people, usually quiet unless they feel comfortable with the energy, good afff music taste deadass I can play any song from my random playlist and they'll know it word for word haha. That's about it tho- sorry I don't really know much about cancers personally. It's giving me- very nice and formal vibes & will understand the assignment (can be loud/chill/outgoing/whatever you want them to be) vibes. 🦀🦎 Chameleon.
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✿ Sun in Aquarius ✿
Eccentric AF in a good way bwahaha ʕ⊙ᴥ⊙ʔ, very IDGAF energy we loveee, caring they only bad mouth people who have wronged them in a bad way other than that- they usually can see both sides of a situation yall give good advice, very humanitarian vibes. Aqua's also are so good at technology! Leave it to an Aqua to find information on ANYONE on the internet they keep receipts also lmfao. Most Aquas I know are apart of the LGBTQ community. 🏳️‍🌈 It's giving me Alien hacker/detective vibes. 👽 Also side note, every aqua I know eats this one thing thats soooo random for ex one of my besties, eats pizza with no cheese just sauce and veggies lol. Random af I love it.
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✿ Sun in Pisces ✿
Never met a pisces who didn't sing lmao! Come thru vocals (you're going to hollywood!). Yall usually draw too or do poetry/sew/paint anything artistic. ╰( ▪‿▪)╮ Yooo I noticed yall always have drug addictions too tho. I honestly think that's why your head be up in the clouds/ lost in the sea void 24/7 😆 Quick Tip: Did you know that when you're under the influence things just hit harder? So why be in that toxic relationship/situation and intensify your emotions when you know it'll be harder to come back from it as a water sign... ahhh. Lemme give you a hug you'll get through this! 🫂 It's giving me XXXTentacion Vibes (listen to his lyrics you'll get the vibes yuh). 💀 Seriously Pisces lemme give you another hug. 🫂 I'm rooting for you, you'll get out of the haze surely enough.
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✿ Sun in Libra ✿
Boujeeeeee!! Never met a libra that didn't dress nice af. Usually uniquely too. Hair game is always on fleek. Yall love to play devils advocate though. I don't think I've ever had any libra talk bad about anyone they were friends with they're loyal and good vibes. Libra's can also be sooo funny!╰(◕ᗜ◕)╯ They love to make everyone feel included so they will play the part to make sure people aren't left out. It's giving me Actor vibes. Also most libra's I know smoke mary jane 🍁 and are on top with their workout routine. Lmfao munchies who??¿ Also Libra's are a lover of beauty never seen a libra date someone who wasnt aesthetically pleasing to the 👁🖼. It's giving me main character/actor Vibes.
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✿ Sun in Gemini ✿
SMARTTTT. Yall know so much in that head of yours. Seriously never had a boring conversation ever with a gemini, great story tellers as well! So effing creative, If you really get to know a Gemini you'll find that they're so good at every flipping hobby like I honestly feel like their mind is hardwired differently from most people. Also very friendly and CHILL. (ノ≧ڡ≦) It's giving me, Golden retriever vibes! 🐕
(Sorry reached the gif limit but picture a cute fluffy doggie! Nyaaa! (: )
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✿ Sun in Saggitarius ✿
VERY ACTIVE/OUTDOORSY but accident prone bwahaha! Why are yall always in the damn hospital or sick? 😅 (ᓀ‸ᓂ) Be careful while skating/doing sports/LIVING damn. GOOFFFYYYYYY. Yall have jokes for days lmao. You know so much about philosophy and other topics its refreshing to have deep non surface conversations with you. As a virgo it's giving me if I was stuck on an island I would survive and probably understand the hidden meaning of life in a fever dream I had from eating poisonous berries vibes. 😆🫐
(Sorry reached the gif limit but imagine a cute wandering explorer not caged down by society! ╰( ▪‿▪)╮ Yuhh)
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✿ Sun in Virgo ✿
Wallflowers.(๑・◡・) We love to observe everyone/everything while also making sure we look the part. We can deadass find anything that's lost. 🔍 Lover of art as well, we love anything to do with the aestethics. Book worms 🐛haha, also we always have one thing/hobby that were really in to that we focus on almost 24/7 in a weird obssesive way. This can be good and bad. Good if its a hobby, bad if its a person RIP. Most virgos I know are popular and chill gives me grounded vibes. It's giving me I'm okay with being a side character unless you want me to be the main character then I'll pop off vibes.
(Sorry ran out of gifs but imagine a hermit who was idulging in books and anything that could make them better themselves as a person ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ)
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✿ Mahalo for reading my 2nd ever tumblr post! How exciting. Hope you all enjoyed this, it was really fun to articulate my feelings as a Virgo sun. Who knows, maybe I'll make more astrology observations hehe. Till then, take care my beautiful earth angels! Moooncats out. (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ✿
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mint-yooxgi · 1 year
Text
{9} - Paradise Gardens - Yandere!Demonic Entities!Ateez X Reader
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Yandere AU & Demon AU - Book Two to Hotel California
Genre: Mature, Horror, Angst, Fluff, Slight Humour
Pairing: Ateez X Reader (Slight focus on Jongho)
Words: 12,135
Warnings: Violence. Arguments and verbal fights. OC gets some sense slapped into them by Reina, literally. Mentions of blood and of small cuts being inflicted to a wrist to draw blood. Mental Illness: mentions of anxiety, depression, and PTSD. This is a Yandere story, it will contain themes such as stalking, violence, obsession, possessive natures, and just general overall creepiness and swearing. You have been warned.
A/n: Not me staying up to post this when I have work in a few hours lmfaoooo anyways, this chapter turned out much longer than I expected! So, yay!! I'm quite happy with how it turned out, cause I feel like the stress of the situation is a sort of catalyst to the argument that ensues. I'm just glad I was able to get in everything that I wanted. It definitely starts off a bit tense, but the ending is quite light and happy. Also, potential smut next chapter anyone? 👀 As always, feedback is greatly appreciated! Enjoy~
Also, gentle reminder that I don’t do tag lists.
Mini Masterlist - Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven - Part Eight
The moment Yeosang feels you brush against his mind, he’s appearing in Reina’s apartment.
“Sweet baby, Jesus.” Reina places a hand over her racing heart as he now stands across from her in the living room. “You weren’t kidding when you said they can just appear.”
“I told you,” you chuckle, moving over to stand beside him. 
You notice that she rests just a tad bit shorter than him as she looks him over, her arms crossed over her chest.
“So, you’re Yeosang.” She takes a moment to look him up and down. “The musician.”
“And you’re Reina.” His brow quirks slightly in amusement. “The best friend.”
“The one and only.” She grins, tucking the tome further beneath her arm. “Though, you had longer, blond hair the first time we met.”
Yeosang spares a glance at you out of the corner of his eyes. “That I did.”
Briefly, you lean into him, explaining lowly what Reina remembers of the incident.
He nods in understanding.
“So,” Reina’s voice draws both of your attention back to her, “you play the violin.”
“I do.” Yeosang confirms with another brief nod of his head.
“A little birdie told me that you learned a specific melody for her.” There’s a knowing lilt to her voice as she says this. “Well done.”
The corners of Yeosang’s lips quirk upwards. A certain pride begins to fill his chest seeing as he cannot get a read on Reina’s thoughts anymore. There seems to be a spell blocking her mind from his, keeping her opinion of him secret. Though, from what she’s implying right now, he assumes that he’s gotten her approval. Or at least, some of it.
“You can do your best friend interrogation later,” you step over to playfully nudge her shoulder. “We’ve got another pressing matter to attend to.”
“Right, right,” she waves you off as the two of you step back over to Yeosang. “Sorry, I can’t help it. Now that I know, I need to make sure they pass my inspection and everything. They may be Kings, but I’m still your best friend.”
You snort out a laugh just as Yeosang places a hand onto each one of your shoulders.
“You know that your approval of them won’t change how I feel.” You grin. “Also, brace yourself: bend your knees, and close your eyes. It helps with the nausea the first few times.”
You barely make out the confused furrow of her brow when Yeosang is teleporting the three of you back home. Once the foyer is in view, you notice Reina stumble forward, and you immediately move to steady her on her feet.
“I warned you,” you chuckle, helping her straighten back upright.
“I don’t think there’s a proper warning for that.” She grumbles, brushing some stray flyaways out of her eyes. She blinks a few times after that, further clearing her vision.
From down the hallway, you notice a few of the other guys file out of Jongho’s room. The commotion must have drawn their attention, and you watch as Reina tenses ever so slightly as the commanding presences of the Kings of the Realm washes over her. The worried pull of their brows could definitely be mistaken for looks of irritation.
Only, she doesn’t have a chance to dwell on it all that much for Sudaem is stepping out of the room.
A gasp of awe escapes Reina, bypassing all of the males to walk right up to the gorgon.
“You must be Sudaem.” She extends her hand out to the female. “I’m Reina, baby caster. Nice to meet ya!”
Sudaem seems taken aback by Reina’s forwardness, and you can only chuckle fondly as you lightly push your best friend into the room.
“We can do proper introductions later.” You finally step into Jongho’s bedroom, seeing that he hasn’t moved a single inch since you last left him two hours ago. Stella seems to be absent as well. “We’re on a tight schedule here.”
“I’ve prepared everything that I could,” Sudaem addresses you. “There are a few things left that the spell requires, other than the caster’s performance.”
“What else does the spell need?” You inquire, watching as Sudaem moves over to the side to grab her own spell book that has been resting open on top of the dresser this whole time. Wordlessly, she hands it to Reina.
“It will need your blood, since you are connected to him in such a way currently.” She says, bringing a brass bowl filled with ash root, along with a few other things, over to you.
Carefully, Reina places her own tome down onto the dresser, balancing the other spell book effortlessly in her hand. You can see her eyes darting over the words on the page, and you just know that she’s taking in all of the instructions with excruciating detail. Her mind is practically racing behind her eyes, suddenly feeling the pressure of this moment building on her shoulders.
“This is a complex spell.” She comments, worried gaze darting over to you.
“It is.” Sudaem is the one to answer, a nod to her head as she holds the bowl beneath your wrist.
You turn to look at the males standing at the side of the room. “I’m going to need a blade.”
You can see the hesitation on their faces even before they say anything.
“If this is going to work-“
“We know, Dearest,” Yeosang grimaces. “We just don’t ever like seeing you injured, no matter the context.”
“I understand that,” you incline your head. “But-“
“I’ll do it,” Hongjoong steps forward, a small dagger appearing in his hand and glinting beneath the candlelight that illuminates the room.
The curtains have long since been drawn, blocking out any and all natural light. Even the door to Jongho’s room has been closed since you’ve all reentered it, only the faint flickering of the flames causing shadows to dance over the walls.
Carefully, Hongjoong grabs your wrist in his free hand, thumb gently stroking over your unmarred skin. He glances upwards briefly, noticing how you nod subtly at him. A small, reassuring smile tugs at the corner of your lips.
“How much blood is needed?” He directs his question towards Sudaem, not even bothering to break eye contact with you.
“At least five drops.” She replies instantly, holding the bowl steady all the while.
Hongjoong nods his understanding, and you can sense the tension in the room radiating off of the others as he brings the edge of the blade to your skin. A flick of his wrist and blood begins dripping into the bowl beneath you. Yet, as always, the pain of such a wound never comes, and from how intently he seems to be staring at your wrist, you know that he has something to do with it.
Not even ten seconds later, Hongjoong’s thumb is tracing over the small incision. Smooth skin replaces the open wound as he heals you without another word, turning his sharp gaze briefly to Sudaem. She scurries away, moving beside Reina with the bowl after hearing his silent command loud and clear.
This should be plenty of blood, anyways.
“All that’s left is to cast the spell,” Sudaem says, and you notice how everyone’s gaze suddenly turns to Reina.
She blinks. “No pressure, or anything.”
“If you can summon the Eight Kings without knowing what you are, you should have no issues with this spell.” Sudaem comments, and you sense the slightest bit of reassurance leaking into her tone.
Your brow quirks slightly.
Taking a candle into her hand, Reina holds it just above the brass bowl that Sudaem clutches beside her. Lightly, she tilts it, allowing the wax to begin dripping into the mixture periodically. Steam begins to rise from the bowl as Reina begins chanting, focussing her energy into casting this spell for the time being.
The bowl bursts into flames, Reina’s voice echoing throughout the room and commanding your attention. Faintly her eyes begin to glow, the whites taking over every visible colour as an intense wind kicks up inside of the room.
You hold your breath, feeling Hongjoong place a comforting hand onto your shoulder just as you reach for Jongho’s own. You can tell that you’re not the only one holding on to another as a lifeline in this moment, worry clear on all of your features as you glance between Reina and Jongho continuously.
The blaze within the bowl begins to die down, along with the wind. Not even a moment later, all of the candles go out, and the room is shrouded in darkness.
Subconsciously, you tighten your hold on Jongho’s hand.
A blink, and both Mingi and San have relit the candles, bathing the room in a warm amber glow once more. The bowl still smokes, but no longer are Reina’s eyes glowing. The only difference seems to be the rise and fall of her chest as she desperately fills her lungs with air.
“Did it work?” She meets your gaze, a sort of hesitance to her voice.
Some complicated spell that was, there weren’t even multiple components to it.
Quickly, you turn your head to face Jongho, noting the steady rise and fall of his own chest. You don’t notice any physical changes, so you lean into him, lifting your free hand to caress the side of his face.
The whole room goes still, anticipation lingering throughout. Not even the flickering sound of the flames can be heard as you all watch Jongho intently, waiting for that tell tale sign of movement beneath his lids.
Except, it never comes.
Your whole body freezes, heart suffocating painfully inside your chest.
“It didn’t work…” your voice is small, words nothing more than a whisper on your lips.
Tears begin to well in your eyes as your throat tightens. You were betting everything on this spell, not even bothering to think of the consequences of it not working. You had faith in Reina, and you had faith in him.
“You must have done something wrong.” Mingi rounds on Reina, a stern frown pulling at his features.
The gorgon shakes her head, devastation clear on her features. “She didn’t.”
“Did we have all the proper ingredients?” Yunho directs his question towards Sudaem, stepping in beside the stunned gorgon.
Sudaem stands there, hands trembling as she clutches the bowl in front of her. Her lips part periodically, like a fish out of water as her snakes begin shifting restlessly over her head. Her slate grey eyes shine with unshed tears, fear freezing her to her spot.
“It should have worked,” she whispers, whole body beginning to shake. “We did everything right: the ingredients, the preparation, the caster.”
“We knew there was going to be a possibility that it wouldn’t.” Seonghwa keeps his voice low, though you can still hear the panic seeping into his tone.
“Are we sure it was the right spell?” San begins pacing, his hand coming up to support his chin as his mind races with what to do.
“It has to be,” Sudaem answers lowly, blinking a few times to clear her vision. “There’s no other spell he could be under, and this is the only one I know to bring him back.”
You opt to remain quiet, mind reeling with all of this information, and lack there of around you. Desperately, you attempt to come up with a solution for a problem you don’t know all of the variables for, drawing a blank each time.
Hesitantly, Reina shifts over to the dresser. She places the spell book in her hands gently on top of the wood, pulling her own tome closer to herself. Slowly, she begins flipping through the pages, skimming through the words until she finds the section she’s looking for. Once she does, her eyes dart over the lines quickly, brain scrambling to comprehend everything going on around her.
A call of your name from her draws your attention.
“Don’t dissociate just yet, and get your ass over here.” Reina states, quite firmly, without taking her gaze away from the book.
Wordlessly, you move over to her side.
“Dissociate?” There’s a hint of worry to Wooyoung’s voice.
Reina points to the page for you to read before turning around to face the others in the room.
“She’s about to get into her own head again,” she blinks, crossing her arms as she leans back against the dresser. “Can you not see the signs?”
A low warning growl escapes San’s lips.
“Don’t growl at her.” You turn your head to look at him from over your shoulder, brow tugging downwards disapprovingly. “She’s only trying to help.”
Without waiting for a response, you turn back around. Reading the words on the page explaining the ‘Veil of the Hypnos’ spell keeps you grounded for the moment, head spinning with what you can do to save Jongho.
“You all need to keep talking.” Reina instructs. “I’m still new at this whole witching thing, but tell me everything you know about this curse he’s under.”
The several males all share a brief look, but it’s Sudaem who speaks first. Calmly, she explains all that she knows about the spell to Reina. Everything that she’s already told you.
Your body goes still, mind churning as you hear the details once more.
“So, he’s stuck in a plane between this world and the next.” You state, blinking blankly down at the page before you.
“Every second lost he could be straying further from his body.” Sudaem confirms, fingers nervously wringing together. “Not to mention what else creeps through the veil.”
You swallow thickly, lips pursing into a thin line. Softly, you begin to nod to yourself.
Reina spares a look at you out of the corner of her eyes. “I know that look.”
“We just need to bring him back to his body.” You’re somewhat just speaking out loud at this point, but you do not shift your eyes away from that page open before you.
The words ‘connection’ and ‘high emotion’ practically glare back up at you.
You turn to look at Reina.
A silent conversation seems to be happening between the both of you. She tilts her head in inquiry, to which your eyes widen exasperatedly. A moment later, her brow furrows in concern while you begin to nod quite eagerly.
“No.” Her tone is firm as she shakes her head. “No way in hell.”
“What?” There’s an even bigger look of worry pulling on Wooyoung’s face as he looks between the two of you.
“Three-hundred and fourteen seconds.” You say. “That’s all you need to give me.”
“That’s just over five minutes.” Hongjoong’s brow furrows in confusion, his arms crossing over his chest.
“Read the page and tell me that that’s not what it’s implying.” You practically slap your hand over the tome open on the dresser beside you. “I can bring him back."
“There is no way I am putting you under the same curse as him just so you can, what? Stumble your way through the veil and attempt to find him?” She replies, her eyebrows practically raising into her hair as her voice rises in pitch. “I am not killing my best friend. That spell hitting you is suicide.”
A hushed understanding passes over the room and panic immediately seizes each male.
“You’re thinking what?” Seonghwa’s eyes look about ready to bug right out of his head, needing to rest a hand against the wall for support.
“Not if I’m prepared for it!” You counter. 
“We’re not putting you under to lose you, too.” San’s voice is firm, a hint of desperation shining through as he looks to you.
“Petal, we need to think this through.” Yunho’s worried tone comes through, his heart pounding restlessly in his chest.
“I have thought it through.” You turn to them. “If this is the only way we can get Jongho back-“
“It’s not the only way.” Sudaem cuts in, her eyes somewhat glazed over as she stares at the ground in thought.
“It doesn’t matter!” Wooyoung is frantic, crossing the distance between the two of you in an instant and holding you at arms length. “We just got you back! We can’t lose you again.”
“This is my choice, Woo.” You reply, placing your own hands gently atop of his own and sliding them from your shoulders.
“No,” San shakes his head. “You’re not thinking clearly.”
“This is insane.” Mingi begins pacing, pulling at his roots once more.
“I’m thinking perfectly fine.” You reply calmly, turning meeting Hongjoong’s wide eyed gaze. “Wasn’t it you who told me that the first step to sanity is embracing the insane?”
“Now is not the time to be arguing about this.” Yeosang crosses his arms over his chest. “Dearest, you can’t say something as reckless as that right now. We might lose our brother, don’t make it so we lose you, too.”
“You won’t lose me.” You shake your head.
“You don’t know that!” There’s genuine fear in Seonghwa’s eyes as he falls to his knees. He looks about ready to start pleading with you in a moment, genuine desperation clear on his features.
“The spell didn’t work when we tried it on Jongho to bring him back,” Hongjoong attempts to keep his voice calm, levelheaded. “What makes you so certain it will work to bring the both of you back this time?”
“I’m connected to all of you, aren’t I?” Your gaze darts around the room, and you notice how Mingi, Seonghwa, and Wooyoung have all started to cry.
“Starlight-“
“Hold the fuck up!” Reina cuts in, furious gaze locked on you. “Are you negating the fact that I will not be casting such a spell on my own fucking best friend?”
“Reina-“
“Don’t you, ‘Reina’ me! I’ll admit, we’ve done some stupid fucking shit before, but this takes the cake!” She slams her hand on top of the dresser beside her. “Do you realize what you’re fucking asking of me? In front of them no less?”
Her free hand points in the several male’s direction, clear panic on her features.
“I understand-“
“I don’t think you do!” Her eyes blaze with an unrivalled fury, the whites of her eyes beginning to glow.
“Um, excuse me-“ A timid voice attempts to cut through the thicket of booming arguments being thrown around the room.
“They would be doing the exact same thing for me right now if I had been the one to actually get hit!” You counter, arm flinging out in the direction of the bed Jongho rests upon to point at him. Briefly, your gaze darts around the room. “You’re telling me that none of you would be thinking any differently if you knew that this was your only option left?”
“There’s a difference, Dearest,” Yeosang grimaces. “We are not human.”
“Excuse me-“ The voice is a little firmer this time, but still gets ignored.
“Don’t you dare play the entities card on me right now.” The tears of frustration you so desperately attempt to hold back begin to streak down your face. “What happened to us being equals?”
You fail to miss the side-eyed glance Reina gives you, backing away slowly from the rising tension in the room.
“That’s not fair, and you know it.” Mingi’s voice is low as he freezes in his spot.
“No, what’s not fair is the double standard you all have when it comes to doing things for me.” You counter, voice rough with the rawness of your emotions. “So, you all can risk your lives for me whenever it pleases you, but when I wish to do the same for one of you it’s suddenly not okay? I’m the reason Jongho is in this godforsaken mess in the first place. Am I not allowed to want to right my wrong? Am I not allowed to want to save a man I love?”
“You know we’ve never blamed you for this, Baby.” San states, wiping away his tears using the back of his hand.
“Petal, we’ve talked about this,” Yunho grimaces slightly, taking a half step towards you only for you to avoid his reach.
“If this is the only option we have, then I will gladly sacrifice myself for someone that I love.” You see the devastation on their faces as soon as the words are out of your mouth.
“But, what about us?” Wooyoung’s voice is small, probably the quietest you’ve ever heard him.
“What about you?” You cross you arms over your chest, a slight frown pulling at your features.
“Are you that desperate to ignore our own feelings on the matter?” San meets your gaze, and you can feel your throat tighten.
“Of course not!” You immediately reply, shaking your head.
“We swore that we would always protect you, and now you want to risk your life for a plan that might not even work?” Mingi shifts restlessly from foot to foot, his hair sticking out in odd ends.
“We don’t know it won’t work.” You reason. “Besides, I’ve survived much worse than some measly little curse.”
Collectively, their breaths hitch.
“Don’t go there.” Seonghwa’s hands brace himself on the floor, his tears spilling freely onto the hardwood beneath his palms.
A low, warning call of your name sounds from Reina.
“We have already almost lost you more times than we ever thought we would,” Hongjoong states, keeping his voice low. “Don’t add another mark to the tally.”
“Then, what are we supposed to do, Hongjoong?” Your hands desperately run over the top of your head, fingers digging into the skin of your skull.
He remains silent, the others offering no other solutions, either.
“This is my choice,” you breathe out. “A choice I know all of you would be making if that were me on that bed right now.”
“Do you even hear yourself right now?” Wooyoung replies, quite exasperatedly. “Your guilt is blinding you from reason!”
“You think I’m doing this solely out of guilt?” You turn your gaze to the younger demon standing near you, your eyes blazing with a sort of pained fear. “That’s not fair and you know it.”
“Do you think that we don’t know exactly what you’re going through right now? That we don’t understand exactly how you’re feeling?” Seonghwa’s voice is strained, glancing up at you through tear filled eyes. “What’s not fair is you making light of the worst night of our lives.”
Your breath catches, and you swear your heart stops. A second later, and your hands are balling into fists at your sides.
“Do you really think that night was any better for me?” Your eyes are bloodshot from all the crying you’re doing, voice cracking as your whole body shakes. “You only got to see the aftermath. I had to live through it! I’m still living it. Every time I close my eyes, if I don’t watch my every goddamn thought, she is there. She is everywhere I look, and she continues to torture me even in death. She has woven herself so deeply into my life that each time I think I pull a thread loose, another appears to take her place.”
“Petal,“ Yunho takes a concerned step towards you again, nothing but sorrow pulling at his features.
“Do you think I’m not terrified to wake up every morning, only to discover that this has all been some elaborate fabrication that she has made in my mind to continue torturing me with?” Your admission has them all freezing in their spots, tears beginning to fall freely down all of their faces. “I never want another person to experience even an ounce of pain that she made me suffer through, and now Jongho could fucking die because of my mistake!”
“Don’t make his sacrifice into something horrific.” Mingi shakes his head, voice barely above a whisper as he attempts to reign in his emotions for the moment. “He would have done what any of us would have in that situation.”
“That’s exactly my point!” You raise your hand a bit exasperatedly in the air. “You cannot avoid the truth that’s always been right in front of you. That’s not fair at all.”
“You think that it’s fair to Wooyoung that you avoid the dance studio because of what she did to you in it?” Yeosang’s voice cutting through the darkness of the room surprises even you. He keeps it steady, watching you with a cautious gaze the whole time.
The aforementioned male remains quiet, a new sense of stillness travelling through the room as Wooyoung suddenly avoids your gaze when you look to him.
“Do you think it’s fair to Seonghwa that you do the same to his tailor shop?” Yeosang adds lowly. San places his hand onto the elder’s shoulder in worry, but Yeosang just shrugs him off before continuing. “You haven’t even looked at the art room or the garden since everything happened. Do you think that’s fair to Yunho? To Hongjoong?”
“Yeosang-“
Yunho’s own worried protest gets cut off by the aforementioned male.
“You haven’t even touched the piano since that day at your parents house,” he continues, keeping his tone steady as he watches you physically trembling before his very eyes. He can tell that you’re doing whatever you can to hold yourself together at this point in time, but you’re simply a moment from falling apart. “Do you think doing something this reckless will reclaim those parts of yourself that you lost? Have you even tried getting them back?”
A brief silence.
“Maybe I don’t want them back.” Your voice is barely above a whisper, yet you fail to realize exactly how your words sound to everyone in that room.
Reina’s eyes are wide as she watches the crestfallen expressions overtake each male’s face. He gaze darts around the room, noticing how nearly all of them barely keep themselves together, whole bodies shaking as the two tallest males fall to their knees.
The sound of the slap reaches your ears before you feel the harsh stinging on your cheek. 
A gasp of surprise escapes Sudaem, her hands coming up to cover her mouth in shock as she stares at the scene before her. Reina’s hand still rests in the air, your head turned harshly to the side as several low warning growls resonate throughout the room.
No matter what the circumstances might be, you are still their Queen, and they will do whatever they can to protect you.
Little do any of you see the way Jongho’s fingers twitch subtly in his sleep.
“How dare you fucking say that in front of me.” Reina’s voice is low as she pulls you upright and holds you firmly at arms length. “Do you even know how that sounded? Directed at them of all people? Pull yourself together. Now is not the time to be arguing about this. You said it yourself, time is of the utmost essence! Sudaem has been trying to tell you all something for the past ten minutes. So, pull your head out of your ass, and stop being a selfish, heartless crab!”
This seems to snap you out of your angry stupor, blinking at your best friend a few times to clear your head. Only, just as you begin to nod along with her words, Reina is torn from you, being pinned to the wall by her throat.
“Don’t you ever speak to My Divine like that again.” Seonghwa’s voice is low as he leans into her, nothing but a harsh whisper on his lips. The eldest looks completely crazed right now, tears streaking down his cheek as his eyes flash in warning.
“Raise your hand against Our Queen like that again, friend or not, and it will be the last thing you ever do.” Wooyoung seethes, gaze pitch black as he stands just behind the eldest for the moment.
“Seonghwa, Wooyoung,” you manage to step over to them, pulling them away from Reina in an instant. “She’s right.” 
Your best friend crumples to the floor, coughing slightly as she attempts to catch her breath.
Turning to face all of the males once more, your shoulders deflate. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”
“We can talk about it later,” Yunho’s voice is soft as he helps Mingi back to his feet. “Okay, Petal?”
A small nod is all he receives in response.
“Geez! You weren’t kidding when you said they’re extremely over protective.” She wheezes, using you as a support as you help her back to her feet.
“You were the one brave enough to slap me in front of them.” You chuckle, feeling all of their eyes on you.
“More like stupid enough.” A weak smile tugs at her lips as she leans on you for the moment. She lets out a chuckle of her own, teasingly nudging your side. “Well, stupid is as stupid does.”
“She’s slapped you before?” There’s a hint of irritation in Mingi’s voice when he says this, head tilting forward the slightest bit in disbelief.
“We’ve been roughhousing since we’ve been young.” You shrug. “She’s the only one allowed to slap me, and I’m the only one allowed to slap her. Only when we’re being ridiculous, of course.”
“She still hurt you.” San stands tense across the room, hands balled into fists at his sides.
“Because I was hurting you.” You meet his gaze briefly before turning back to face Sudaem. “My apologies, you were going to say?”
The gorgon straightens a bit in her spot, clearing her throat as she feels everyone’s eyes on her. Nervously, she shifts from foot to foot, her snakes falling silent around her as their tongues flick out to scent the tension slowly dissipating from the air.
“I was just going to say,” she looks to you, “this isn’t our only option.”
Your brow furrows. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, there’s another spell that will put you under, and enable you to walk through the veil without having to use the ‘Veil of the Hypnos’ curse.” She explains.
“Then, what are we waiting for?” You take an eager step forward.
“Petal, we need to talk about this,” Yunho’s worried voice reaches your ears, the events of the past ten minutes still swirling through his mind.
“Hang on a moment, I’m not done,” Sudaem raises a hand in the air in a halting motion. “This one does indeed have a time limit, and you cannot wander too far from your body lest you actually wind up lost in the veil forever.”
You swear you see Mingi pulling out his hair again just as Wooyoung turns around with an exasperated huff.
“There’s no winning with this, is there?” Hongjoong sighs, shaking his head.
“How does it work?” You motion for Sudaem to continue.
“Well, again, since you’re connected, you would have the best chance of finding him if put under.” She begins. “Your mind would essentially be transported to the space between realms and set to wander freely for about five minutes. Then, we’d have to pull you and whoever you’re holding on to back out. At least this way we guarantee you won’t die on contact from the initial casting of the spell.”
“And if I can’t find him?” You spare a glance at all of them around the room. “What then?”
“Then, we’ll take it from there.” Seonghwa sighs, running a hand through his hair.
Your lips tighten into a thin line, turning back to face Sudaem as your thoughts race. Shifting, you rest a hand on top of the dresser to support yourself with as you look down at the ground. Blinking a few times, you think everything over.
“This all has to do with the mind being separated from the body, right?” You spare a glance at Sudaem.
“In a way, yes.” She confirms. “The body cannot live without the mind.”
“What if the mind had a physical attachment to this realm? Would that give me more time? Would it make the spell easier?” You meet her gaze, and you know she can see the gears turning in your mind.
“It’s possible, but I’m not sure.” Sudaem replies honestly. “It might make it easier when you get called back to your body, though. You’d have a direct path back to it, no matter how far you were.”
You nod your understanding, turning to face the several males standing off to the side once more. One brush against all of their strings lets them know exactly what you’re thinking.
The several males share a look.
“We don’t like this, but at least it’s a better option than the other one.” Yunho crosses his arms over his chest.
“We’d rather it be one of us that goes under.” San adds, lifting his head to meet your gaze.
“There are things worse than just mist floating around inside the veil.” Seonghwa breathes out, somewhat shakily.
“Then, I’ll be quick. If anything happens, I’ll tug back so you know to pull me out right away.” You state rather firmly, turning back to face Sudaem. “What do I need to do?”
Sudaem spares a glance around the room, the faintest hint of apology on her features as she meets the King’s gazes. Then, taking a deep breath, she begins.
Which is exactly how you find yourself sitting on the edge of Jongho’s bed, his hand held tightly in yours not even five minutes later.
“We’re going to need more of your blood.” Sudaem holds that brass bowl in her hands once more.
Mingi, Wooyoung, and San all curse under their breaths.
“I will gladly bleed again,” you state, rather firmly. “I will bleed as many times as it takes to ensure that this works, and he comes back to us. It’s what I would do for any of you, and I know you would all do the same for me.”
Any words of protest that had been building on their lips fail, frustrated looks of understanding passing over their features. You’re right, and even though they don’t particularly like this, they’ll deal with it. They have to.
Again, it’s Hongjoong that gently slits your skin, taking your pain and making sure to heal you as soon as possible. This time, though, Sudaem paints a symbol over the back of your hand, mirroring it on Jongho’s as his is still held firmly in your own.
Softly, you brush up against that maroon string in your mind before grabbing ahold of it as tightly as you can. This string will be your lifeline to him, and you hope beyond everything that your theory of it guiding you to him is correct.
A second later, you feel the rest of the guys doing the same to you. You don’t even need to look at any of them to sense the worry and slight hesitation that they all have lingering in their thoughts, for you sense it loud and clear through the mind links.
They move in closer.
“You’ll have just over five minutes if this all goes well.” Sudaem tells you, moving over to stand beside Reina who holds the one spell book in her hands.
“Angel, are you sure about this?” Wooyoung’s frantic voice reaches your ears, and you can see the concern still clear as day in his gaze as he looks at you.
“Positive.” You nod, and despite the shakiness to your breath, you believe that this will work.
“Any sign of danger, and you immediately contact us to pull you out.” San reiterates, cupping your cheek and forcing you to meet his gaze. “Okay, Baby?”
“Okay,” you nod your understanding, briefly leaning into his touch before turning away from him.
“We’re right here, Petal.” Yunho steps closer, sitting beside you on the bed and placing a hand onto your back in comfort.
You smile. “I know.”
Lovingly, you brush against their strings. Although it’s slight, you can just tell how much that simple notion helps them to relax.
Lifting your head, you turn to glance at both Sudaem and Reina. “I’m ready.”
Two nods from either female greet you in response. 
“Remember, send a pulse through the bond after every minute that passes so I know how much time has elapsed, and that I have left.” You spare a glance at them out of the corner of your eyes. “After the fifth one, if I don’t tug back immediately, wait fifteen seconds, and then pull me out.”
Nods of understanding are seen around the room from all of them, and you notice how Yeosang comes to kneel beside you. A blink, and he’s grabbing your free hand into his own, clinging to you for dear life. You don’t even have to look at him to know how worried he is. Not only that, but how remorseful he is for the way he spoke to you. The sorrow is written all over his face.
He will never forgive himself if they can’t pull you back out. The last thing he wants is for your final memory of him to be his harsh tone reminding you of your own trauma responses. He knows it wasn’t right of him to say those things and make you feel worse than you probably already do. Especially right now.
“Let’s do this.” Determination shines in your eyes as you look down at Jongho resting on the bed. Silently, you tug on that maroon string connecting your mind to his, sending reassuring thoughts his way.
I’m coming, Baby Bear. You swallow, somewhat nervously. Wait for me.
Not even a moment later, Reina begins immediately focusing on the page before her, while Sudaem holds that bowl close by. Softly, Reina begins chanting, her eyes beginning to glow white as power surges through the room. You can feel the mark on the back of your hand beginning to burn, and when you look down, it begins to glow a deep red. Again, a breeze picks up throughout the room, shifting the flames as shadows dance along the walls.
Then comes the silence, followed immediately by the darkness of all of the candles going out once more.
A blink and the flames are reignited.
“Did it work?” Hesitantly, Reina glances around the room.
All eyes are drawn to the bed where they see your limp body resting in Yunho’s arms. Your eyes are closed, and the symbol drawn in your blood glows faintly. Luckily, your chest seems to rise and fall steadily in even breaths. Faintly, all of the males in the room brush against your mind, holding onto that connection for dear life.
Your five minutes start now.
The first thing you notice when you go under is how light your body suddenly feels. It’s as if you’re floating upon a cloud, swaying gently with the breeze.
Your brow furrows, and groggily, you begin to blink your eyes open. Slowly, you begin to stand.
Fog surrounds you on all sides, a bright light shining from behind you. Turning reveals a faint archway, multiple colours streaming through the pale golden light. Familiar colours which seem to stretch out and attach themselves to you.
Sparing a glance down, you nearly jump back in surprise.
There, resting peacefully on the ground, is your sleeping body. You notice your arm stretched out to the side, and following the path it makes reveals Jongho’s body laying directly beside yours. Your fingers are intertwined, a faint red glow emanating from your hands.
At least you have a marker to make it back to.
Backing up slightly, you watch as those colours stretching out from the archway move with you. A moment later, and they seem to pulse with movement.
Your eyes widen in understanding. A minute has already passed.
Turning around to face the vast expanse before you, you attempt to peer through the fog. The faintest outlines of a maroon line can be seen in one direction, and you cling harder to that string in your mind.
Gently, you give it a small tug.
Something roars in the distance, and you feel your blood run cold. Whipping your head from side to side, you fail to see anything close by. Yet, that doesn’t prevent you from putting one foot in front of the other quickly in order to begin following that faint maroon line further into the mist.
The only sounds that reach your ears are that of your breathing, and the constant repetition of your feet scraping along the ground. Frantically, your eyes dart around you in search of any signs of movement, or shapes through the mist. You have a creeping feeling of being watched, and you know to trust your instincts for the moment, especially when in a place like this.
Feeling the second brush against your mind, you quicken your pace. Again, you tug lightly on that maroon string, and this time, a low growl sounds in the area, much closer than before.
You follow it.
“Come on, Baby Bear,” you mutter, eyes desperately scanning the mist for something. Anything. “Where are you?”
With every step you take, you notice that faint maroon line becoming brighter and brighter. The fog seems to be thinning too, and you can begin to make out faint shapes in the distance. One seems to be much large than the three surrounding it, and as you get closer, you begin to see corpses of… things lining the ground.
Limbs are twisted in odd angles, black blood splattered against the pale grey ground. These things appear creature like in shape, some having leather wings like bats, while others are more dog like, but they’re all about the same size. Not to mention they all seem to be that same pale grey colour as their surroundings.
Just as you feel that third brush against your mind, you see them.
A large brown grizzly bear fends off the last three of these creatures. One gets trapped in his maw, while another is torn apart by his claws. The last creature manages to jump on his back, sinking it’s own claws into his skin as he cries out in pain. Only, the bear manages to roll over quickly, crushing the smaller creature beneath its tremendous weight.
He stands back to his feet as he shakes out his fur, starting with his head.
You’d recognize that movement anywhere, and before you can stop yourself, you begin sprinting towards him. Another frantic tug is given to that maroon string and you watch as that bear lifts its head in your direction almost instantly.
Warm, brown eyes meet your gaze, and you swear you see that maroon line leading directly to him light up with a vibrance unlike ever before. In a few bounds, he’s reached you, nuzzling his snout into your neck and stepping in as close to you as he can.
What are you doing here? His voice sounds a little frantically inside of your mind, and you physically breathe a sigh of relief.
I came to get you. You brush your hands over the top of his head tenderly, wrapping your arms around his neck and practically sinking into his soft form.
It’s dangerous here. You shouldn’t be-
Neither should you! You immediately cut him off, pulling away to stare deeply into his eyes.
The fourth brush is felt against your mind.
We need to hurry back, I only have a minute left before they pull us out. You motion behind you with your head.
How do you know which way you’re going? I’ve been lost in here for days. The furrow of his brow is clear, even while in his bear form.
You smile. I’ve got my lights to guide me home.
Instantly, you picture connecting his string to all of his brothers inside of your mind, and the way you feel the land around you begin to tremble lets you know that they’ve all felt it. Only, you have less than a minute to make it back to your bodies before they’re pulling you out.
Subtly, you notice Jongho’s eyes glance over to the low glow of the colours attached to your form. Bending down, he motions for you to craw onto his back. 
Hop on.
Without hesitation, you do.
Jongho immediately takes off into the fog, chasing those colours that drift through the air and connect you to all of them back home.
A warning screech echoes in the distance and you hear Jongho curse lowly.
Stay low to my back, the ones with wings are ruthless. He instructs, picking up his pace the slightest bit.
You do as told, clinging to his fur for dear life as Jongho races through the mist and back to that bright archway that begins to shine faintly in the distance. Luckily, you don’t see anything chasing you, but you know better than that. The faint flapping of wings, and pounding of feet upon the ground behind you lets you know that more of those creatures are giving chase, and they don’t seem to be relenting anytime soon.
With each passing second, you can see that archway getting closer and closer. Faintly, the outlines of your bodies can be seen laying on the ground, not having moved a single inch since you left them there about four and a half minutes ago. In fact, you’re positive that fifth brush will be coming at any moment now. You just hope you can both make it in time.
The second you feel that fifth brush against your mind, you go tumbling from Jongho’s back mere feet away from your body.
A frantic call of your name is heard above the hissing surrounding you, feeling pain erupt on your arms as claws dig into your flesh.
Blinking up at the creature, you see a sight that tears a shriek from your lips. It has no face, except for a jagged slit of a mouth where its chin should be. Rows upon rows of razor sharp teeth greet you as its lips pull back in a what appears to be a gleeful grin. Leathery wings protrude from its arms, it’s claws pinning you in place on the ground as your blood spills from your wounds.
The faintest hissing of the word ‘human’ on the air draws your attention. A horrid hissing that is filled with excitement the more it echoes around you by varying creatures, all of whom begin to step out of the fog and surround the two of you endlessly.
A blink, and the creature is swiped from above you, being torn in half by Jongho’s claws.
You can feel your heartbeat in your ears, blood rushing through your veins as you roll over quickly to avoid another dog-like creature pouncing on top of you. Luckily, you roll right into your own side, eyes wide as you see Jongho a mere foot from you.
A frantic call of his name escapes your lips as you reach out to him, knowing you only have mere seconds before you’re pulled out of this veil and back to reality. So, you fight with everything that you are to hold on for as long as you can. Until you can feel his hand in your own.
It’s as if the word around you moves in slow motion. You begin to feel an unfamiliar tug at your mind, pulling you backwards through the archway by your head. It’s as if a hook has been placed right behind your forehead, jerking you backwards unforgivingly as Jongho shifts back into his human form. Desperately, he reaches out to you and his own body with each of his hands, fingers just brushing against your own. 
At the same time, the creatures surrounding you all lunge. Snarls sound all around you as they attempt to reach you before you can escape, hissing about not letting such a delicacy leave.
The last thing you see is a wall of creatures swarming you as you pass through the veil. You experience a brief feeling of falling, your hand tightening around something warm as you sink into the abyss surrounding you.
You close your eyes.
A gasp escapes you as your whole body jerks upwards in Yunho’s arms. Blinking a few times, you clear your vision, noticing how you seem to have slid off of the side of the bed and onto the floor. Still, Jongho’s hand in held in your own.
Your breathing is frantic as you heave air into your burning lungs, head turning every which way to gather your bearings. Yeosang rests beside you, clinging onto your opposite hand as he presses it to his forehead. The chest your back is pressed against belongs to Yunho, and you notice the others surrounding you with looks of complete worry on their features.
Your whole body aches, but you force yourself back onto the bed, much to their discontent.
“Dearest,” Yeosang reaches out to you, brushing one of his thumbs near your chin.
You shrug him off, glancing a hint of red now lining his skin.
Breaking your hold on his hand, you wipe at you nose. Pulling away reveals your own blood, and you begin to wonder just how long your nose has been bleeding for.
No wonder they all look so worried.
“Are you okay?” Hongjoong kneels in beside Yeosang, placing a gentle hand onto your thigh. Though, with how badly you feel him shaking against you, you cannot tell if it’s more for him or for you at this point.
You nod, turning to face Jongho on the bed.
“I had him.” Your voice is no more than a whisper, tears leaking out of your eyes as you look down to see him still in that calm state of sleep. “He was right there.”
You practically collapse on top of him, sobs wracking your entire body as you pull your intertwined hands up to your chest. It’s faint, but you swear you feel his fingers tighten against your own.
The room is quiet around you, but it seems somewhat brighter than before. Someone must have opened the curtains to let the natural light of day in around you. It’s warm, and you swear you can feel a ray of sunlight shining directly onto your cheek as you keep your eyes closed for the moment. Warmth of which is mirrored in the way a hand tenderly caresses the back of your head.
“My Darling,” a rough voice, strained from lack of use over the past day and a half, reaches your ears. “Why are you crying?”
Your whole body freezes, breath catching in your throat as your heart skips a beat inside of your chest. Tentatively, you shift your head, peering up at him through tears which blur your vision.
A blink, and they clear, falling upon your cheeks like rain against a windowpane.
Your lower lip quivers as you watch him sit up with you in his arms, his warm, brown eyes searching your face carefully. His hand that had been gently cradling the back of your head shifts to cup the side of your face tenderly, brushing away your tears with his thumb.
A moment of stillness travels throughout the room.
In the blink of an eye, you’ve fully collapsed into his arms, a fresh round of sobs tearing from your throat. Your whole body shakes as apologies fall endlessly from your lips, hands desperately clinging onto him as if he may disappear again at any given moment.
Softly, he shushes you, cooing gentle reassurances in your ear as he rocks you back and forth while in his arms.
“I’m okay.” He keeps his voice low, holding you to him as desperately as you cling onto him. “You’re not at fault.” Your breath hitches. “You’re not at fault.”
You sob harder.
“We’ll be in the foyer.” Reina’s soft voice reaches your ears, and you assume she’s guiding both herself and Sudaem out of the room to give you all some privacy.
More apologies fall from your lips a you bury your face into the side of Jongho’s neck. With your void down for the moment due to the requirements of the spell, they can all tell that you’re no longer just apologizing to the youngest anymore, but to all of them. Yourself included.
“It’s alright, Darling.” Jongho strokes a hand tenderly down your spine as his brothers all come to sit around the edges of his bed. “I’m here now. I’m not going anywhere.”
“It’s good to have you back.” Yunho nods once, quite firmly, at his younger brother. His voice is strained, and it’s not just from seeing you in such a fragile state yet again.
Jongho smiles faintly. “It’s good to be back.”
Desperately, your hands cling to the front of his shirt.
“I should have listened to you,” you’re babbling at this point, but you don’t care. “I didn’t think-“ a sharp, stuttering inhale, “you almost died because of me.”
“Hey, hey,” Jongho grabs you gently by your cheeks, pulling you away from him so you can meet your gaze. “Stop that right now. I know how worried you were about your sister. Do you not think I’ve experienced that same worry when you are threatened?” He rests his forehead against your own, staring deeply into you eyes. “It is not your fault.”
“But-“
“No ‘but’s!” He places a finger against your lips, soon beginning to wipe away the dried blood with the edge of his blanket. “I wanted to help you, to protect you, and I would gladly do it all over again in a heartbeat.”
You fall silent, fingers curling the slightest bit tighter against his shirt.
“I thought…” you squeeze your eyes shut.
A brief look is shared with his brothers around him, and his heart squeezes painfully as they divulge with him their memories of the final moments before, and shortly after, he succumbed to the spell.
Jongho’s grip tightens around your body, his voice low, “My Darling, you know I could never blame you for this.”
Your breath hitches in your throat once more.
“You are not at fault.” He breathes. “I sincerely apologize that I ever made you believe that you were.”
You shake your head, sniffling all the while.
“But I did, Darling.” He rests his chin on your shoulder. “I hurt you when you were in such a fragile state, and now you won’t stop blaming yourself for something that was completely out of your control. If anyone is to blame, it’s that fucking bitch.”
Low growls of agreement sound from around the bed.
Slowly, you begin to calm down, yet all you can do is nod your head.
“What-“ Jongho’s breath catches in his throat, “what happened while I was out?”
The whole time his brothers share with him their memories of the past thirty-three hours or so, Jongho sits on his bed completely still. You swear that he’s stopped breathing all together, his chest barely rising and falling as you continue to cling onto him for dear life.
The second you feel something wet land on your shoulder, you pull away to stare into his eyes.
Tears stream endlessly down his face, a look full of nothing but painful sorrow resting on his features.
“You-“ his voice trembles, and he can barely get the words out. “You fell.”
Again, you attempt to shake your head, “no-“
“You fell because of me.” Utter devastation suffocates his very soul, guilt beginning to rise and crush his heart from the inside out.
“It was a misunderstanding.” Your hands now rest on his shoulders as you sit in his lap, your legs resting on either side of him.
“My Darling, I am so sorry-“
“You have nothing to apologize for.” Your voice is firm as you cut him off.
“Neither do you.” He responds without a second of hesitation.
You fall silent for a moment, blinking shamefully as you avert your gaze. “Yes, I do.”
Finally, you turn to face the other seven males still in the room with you. Luckily, Jongho settles you between his legs, wrapping his arms around your waist and holding you to his chest for support.
Glancing upwards, you look around at the males before you.
“I apologize for what I said earlier.” Your voice trembles the slightest bit with the weight of your emotions. “I didn’t mean those words to come out the way they had, but they did. I shouldn’t have kept everything bottled up for so long inside. I should have told you, and I should have considered your own feelings towards the matter.”
“Baby,” San’s worried voice reaches your ears, his eyebrows drooping as he watches you avert your gaze to your hands.
“I should have been more honest with you all about how I was feeling.” Your thumbs begin to nervously rub over one another. “I never meant to hurt any of you.”
The males all share a brief look.
“We were all in the wrong.” Hongjoong says, words barely above a whisper. “We should have known you were barely holding it together all this time.”
“How can you know if I don’t tell you?” You exhale a low breath, allowing your eyes to flutter shut.
“Dearest,” Yeosang goes to reach out for you before stopping himself. Almost shamefully, he retracts his hand. “I apologize for what I said to you. It wasn’t the time, nor place to dump that on you, nor was it right of me to do so.”
“But you were right.” You spare a glance upwards to see Yeosang staring down at his own hands. “By avoiding reminders of her, I had inadvertently been avoiding all of you. That’s not fair to any of you, or what each of those spaces mean to us, and I apologize that it took me this long to realize that.”
“We weren’t lying to you when we said that we would get through this together,” Wooyoung cracks a small, hesitant smile in your direction.
Softly, you nod, wiping at your eyes all the while. “I was so focused on my own trauma, I neglected your own.”
“We all deal with things in different ways.” Mingi clears his throat, bringing a hand up to dry his tears.
“That’s no excuse for what I did.” You reply. “For what I said.”
“You were right, though.” Seonghwa swallows thickly. “If that was you, we would have done whatever it takes to get you back. Consequences be damned.”
Jongho squeezes your waist slightly, assuring you that his brother speaks nothing but the truth.
“Aren’t we all a great pair,” you chuckle teasingly. “Letting our emotions always control us.”
A snort is heard from Wooyoung. “Maybe not always.”
Even his brothers shoot him playfully incredulous looks.
“Only when it comes to each other,” Hongjoong sighs, somewhat wistfully as he finally stands back to his feet.
“If you start having doubts again, or anything of the sort, you tell us right away, Baby.” San meets your gaze, a somewhat firm look shining behind his eyes. “Okay?”
“The same goes for me with all of you,” you take the time to look around at all of them once more, seeing them smile softly at you in response.
“You do not have to suffer alone, Petal,” Yunho smiles assuringly in your direction. “Your worries do not burden us at all.”
You nod, shifting off of the bed with the help of Mingi and Seonghwa.
“I guess some habits are just that hard to break.” You sigh.
“Baby steps, My Love,” Hongjoong moves over to the door, a gentle smile tugging at his features as he looks back at you. “Baby steps.”
Wiping at your eyes a final time to ensure there’s no more evidence of your tears, you begin to exit Jongho’s room. You don’t even need to look their way to know that they all follow closely behind you.
Breaching the foyer, you see both Sudaem and Reina conversing softly on one of the front couches. Both spell books rest closed on the table before them. However, as soon as Sudaem senses you, she’s hopping up from the couch, he snakes shifting almost bashfully over her head.
Her gaze darts to Jongho just off to your left. “I’m glad to see you well again, King Jongho.”
Reina stands, a small quirk to her brow.
Without wasting another moment, you walk directly over to the two women and wrap them in your arms.
“Thank you.” Your voice is low, nothing but raw gratitude seeping from your tone. “For everything.”
Softly, you feel Sudaem rubbing your back while Reina pats you gently.
“I’m glad I could help.” Sudaem whispers, pulling away to stare deeply into your eyes. “If you ever need anything else, you know where to find me.”
“I appreciate that,” you smile, nodding as you step away to give them both some space. “Know that the sentiment is shared.”
“Anyways, I best be going now,” Sudaem shuffles slightly on her feet, reaching over to grab her spell book from the coffee table that rests beside her. “I wouldn’t want to overstay my welcome.”
“Wait, how will I be able to contact you for lessons?” Reina’s eyes widen ever so slightly, and you recognize that almost desperate look shining within anywhere.
The corner of your lips quirk upwards knowingly.
“If you ever need me, send word with Stella.” Sudaem smiles, and you watch as Reina nearly swoons.
“Okay,” she nods, quite enthusiastically.
“It was lovely meeting you!” Sudaem directs the comment towards your best friend as she waves goodbye, her snakes hissing happily.
“You, too!” Reina waves back as Sudaem walks over to the guys for the moment.
“Uh, would it be okay if one of you-“
“Already on it,” Yunho smiles lightly at the gorgon, teleporting her back to her own domain in an instant. In a blink, he’s returns, straightening out the front of his shirt slightly.
“So,” you wiggle your brow teasingly at Reina, “Sudaem, huh?”
“Shut up.” Reina grumbles, pushing you playfully.
“She’s sweet, isn’t she?” A knowing smirk tugs at your lips as you watch your best friend avert her gaze somewhat bashfully.
“So,” Reina clears her throat, composing herself a bit better for the moment, “introductions now, or later?”
You motion to the guys with your hand, letting them decide for themselves if they’d like to introduce each other to your best friend. Your void has long since been back up, so you take the time to brush against their minds now.
Immediately, they all brush back.
“I think introductions are a great idea,” Hongjoong says, a small quirk to his lips. “After all, you helped save our brother.”
She nods, a kind look resting on her features as they all incline their heads to her in thanks.
“Hang on a second,” you lift a hand once more in a halting motion as you look at Reina. “How did you know that Yeo was what he was when he dropped me off?”
“I’ve seen portraits,” she shrugs, “but I didn’t know their names. My gran was adamant about not,” she clears her throat, nose scrunching as she prepares to imitate her grandmother, “incurring the wrath of the Eight Kings by invoking their names.”
You can’t help it, an amused snort escapes you.
“So, I recognized him, but I didn’t know which one he was until you told me his name.” She explains, to which you nod your head. “I am very interested to learn which ones are which based off of what you told me.”
Just then, a loud mewl is heard from the hallway leading to your room. A loud gasp is escaping Reina’s lips as a black cat struts into the room, tail flicking back and forth eagerly in the air.
“Is that Kuroo?” Her lips part, an excited smile pulling at her features.
Softly, Kuroo weaves his way through all of your legs, brushing languidly against both yours and Mingi’s the longest. A moment later, and he’s trotting over to Reina who bends down to extend her hand out to him. Cautiously, he sniffs at her fingers before beginning to rub his face all over her.
Giggling, she begins to scratch at his head, Kuroo beginning to purr loudly all the while.
“Well, aren’t you just the handsomest man of the hour.” She coos, chuckling as Kuroo chirps back happily in response.
“Oh, no, don’t say that.” Wooyoung sighs, almost exasperatedly. “It’ll go straight to his already overinflated head.”
“But he’s so cute!” She coos, picking him up to hold him in her arms. “And fluffy!”
A content mewl greets all of you in response.
“Kuroo is Sammy two-point-oh.” You say, watching as understanding passes over Reina’s features. “Just less of a troublemaker.”
“Ah,” she nods, rocking him gently in her arms, “I see.”
Softly, she begins cooing at him once more, and you can just tell that he’s just loving every second of it.
“Okay, so,” you quirk a brow, “introductions?”
“Oh, wait,” Reina’s lip quirks mischievously in the corner, “can I guess?”
You snort out a laugh, gaze darting to the males beside you who shrug nonchalantly. “Be my guest.”
“Hang on, there’s actually one of you who I’ve been dying to know whom is who since she told me.” She admits, eyes scanning over all of them. “I know him,” she motions to Yeosang with her chin seeing as she holds onto Kuroo for the moment, “but which one of you is Yunho, the painter?”
Said male’s brows raise slightly in amusement, waving his hand to indicate that he is who she’s looking for.
“I would give you a thumbs up, but my hands are full,” she chuckles. “Either way, nice.” An approving nod is sent his way. “So far, you’re my favourite.”
The looks all several of his brothers send him in mild disbelief has a laugh falling from your lips.
“It was the portrait, wasn’t it?” You turn to look at Reina, a grin tugging at your features.
“Literally, why isn’t it hanging right there?” She shifts Kuroo over to her one arm, motioning to the central wall behind the front desk. “Guy paints what is presumably the most beautiful portrait of a gorgeous lady you’re all in love with, and you can’t even display it in your front foyer?”
Reina tuts, shaking her head teasingly.
“Don’t give them any ideas,” you whisper lowly.
Mingi tilts his head slightly in acknowledgment. “She does have a point.”
“See!” Reina replies, somewhat exasperatedly. “The cat dad understands!”
“Cat dad?” Mingi quirks a brow.
“Are you not Mingi? The one who got this little rascal for her?” Reina pats Kuroo lightly on the butt, receiving a small whine from the cat in response.
“I am.” He confirms. “How did you-“
“He rubbed against you the longest out of all of you,” she blinks, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. In the next moment, she pulls the cat away to brush her nose against his own, a teasing lilt to her voice, “besides his mommy.”
A hand comes up to muffle your laughter as you hear Kuroo complaining loudly. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say he’s embarrassed. He jumps down from Reina’s hold quite quickly after that, strutting away back down the hallway and towards you room.
You walk over to Reina, flinging an arm around her shoulders as you lean on her teasingly for support.
“Okay, so,” you grin, “You technically know four of them.”
“That I do,” she hums, gaze briefly darting over to meet Jongho’s. She sends him a polite smile, noticing how he nods briefly back. “Let’s see, we’ve got the cook, the dancer, the tailor, and the one who should have told you he liked playing with knives sooner.”
At her words, Hongjoong’s eyebrow twitches.
“Ah-ha!” She points at him, a knowing smirk tugging at her lips. “So, you’re the one she got with the steak knife.”
A snort of laughter is heard from Wooyoung at this, and even Yeosang, San, and Mingi all have a hard time suppressing their chuckles.
“You’re lucky, then,” Reina continues, a devious look shining behind her eyes as he quirks a brow. Despite your attempts to stop her, she holds you off from covering her mouth. “Normally, she just threatens to stab you instead.”
“Reina,” your voice is a bit exasperated as you whine out her name.
Despite the fact that they all quirk their brows in some way, Wooyoung looks the most visibly eager to learn more.
“What else does she threaten to do to people?” He leans the slightest bit forward, excitement gleaming in his gaze. Though, he knows that he’s not the only one dying to know.
“Well, not so much actually threaten, but she has very vivid rants about certain people.” Reina hums knowingly. “My ex is one of them.”
“Yeah, well,” you turn to look at her. “He deserves to get his dick ripped off and shoved down his throat for what he did to you.”
“Case in point,” Reina chuckles knowingly, motioning to you beside her with her hand. “Though, I’d say that was one of your more tamer ones. Wouldn’t you?”
You shrug lightly, a slight hum escaping you.
“Anyways,” she turns her attention back to the three remaining males she’s yet to identify. “I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that you’re the dancer,” she points at San, “he’s handsy,” she points to Wooyoung, “and you’re the ‘pretty boy’.”
Seonghwa’s eyes look as if they’re ready to fall out of his head for the second time that day as both Wooyoung and you burst out laughing.
“Oh, you were doing so well, too.” You pat her on the back.
Lowly, Seonghwa begins to grumble about being referred to as handsy once more, crossing his arms over his chest. A large pout tugs at his features all the while as his brothers all chuckle around him.
“It was one time!” He frowns.
“Oh, it was more than once,” the corner of your lips quirk upwards in a knowing grin. At the way his pout deepens, you’re quick to add, “I never said I didn’t like it.”
“Ew!” Reina slaps your arm teasingly. “There are children present!”
“Children?” Yeosang quirks an amused brow.
“Yeah,” Reina snorts. “Me!”
“Oh, please,” you roll your eyes. “Who was it that called me to drive her to the ER because she got her-“
A hand is slapped over your mouth quite suddenly, a nervous chuckle escaping her lips. Not even a moment later, her face is contorting in disgust as she pulls her hand away, wiping her palm on your sleeve, seeing as you licked her.
“You are gross.” She sticks her tongue out at you.
“You love it.” You playfully bat your eyelashes at her in response.
“Yeah, yeah,” teasingly, she gives you a light shove while rolling her eyes.
None of the males across from you can prevent the way loving smiles pull at their features as they watch you interact with you best friend. It seems as if the more time you spend with her, the more you relax. A fact of which they could not be happier about. Besides, you seem to be having fun.
“Anyways, you’re half right about Woo being handsy number two, though,” you motion to the aforementioned male with your chin.
“Hey!” He whines, a dramatic pout tugging at his features.
“You’re still in second place, Sunshine.” You grin fondly, mirth dancing behind your gaze as you meet his own.
“Oh, damn,” Reina says. “I really screwed up at the end there.”
“You were off by one each, if you rotated them to the left,” you pat her back assuringly.
“My bad,” she smiles somewhat nervously.
“At least you didn’t say Mingi was the cook,” San grins, his eyes crinkling at the sides.
“Hey!” Said male whines.
“To be fair, I thought he was handsy at first,” Reina shrugs.
Yunho immediately bursts out laughing, slapping Mingi on his back as the younger male begins to turn bright red.
“He definitely could be,” Hongjoong sighs, shaking his head somewhat fondly.
“If you think I’m bad with my fantasies…” Wooyoung trails off, immediately taking off down the hallway as the elder male begins to chase after him.
Reina laughs, looping her arm around your waist. “I can tell it’s never a dull moment with these guys.”
“You have no idea.” You smile lovingly at them, seeing the way Kuroo now chases after Wooyoung, too, with Mingi in tow.
“Well, now that that’s settled,” she turns her head to you, a mischievous gleam in her eyes. “Wanna give me a tour of the house?”
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Text
“you can call me on my phone i’ll run to you, you won’t ever have to Sleep Alone”
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“but if you want it you can have it, you can have me in full”
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synopsis// the lines between platonic and romantic become even more blurred for you, if possible, when you realize your best friend truly would do anything for you.
pairing// maki zenin x gn!reader
word count// 1.8k
contents// ages arent specified but everyone is adults, angst if you squint maybe, ooc maki/soft maki, hurt/comfort?, mentions of nightmares
notes// YES THIS IS INSPIRED BY ANOTHER WATERPARKS SONG LMFAOOOO. i cannot be stopped but cmon its sleep alone!! sleep alone supremacy!! my fav!!! also also this was supposed to be wayyyy more light hearted n then it suddenly got kinda deep for a moment idk how that happened... anyways do ppl even read maki ff?
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Nightmares were nothing new to you; you had them quite frequently, if not all the time, and your best friend had repeatedly told you to call her when they occurred, and she would be more than willing to come and comfort you. But how could you do that? You couldn't for two reasons.
The first being that your best friend was Maki, and she wasn't much of a touch person (or really a people person in general), which is all you wanted in those moments: to be held. and two, that your best friend was Maki. the girl you are quite literally in love with. Is it silly to be in love with the oh-so independent girl who demands to do things herself? Yes, very much so, and you know that considering you’re the exact opposite. Neither of which is a bad thing; it just makes things difficult— well it would if you two were dating, you think. 
Tonight was just like any other night: you got yourself comfy in bed, scrolled through your phone for a few minutes before texting a sweet little goodnight to Maki, who quickly replied back, wishing you sweet dreams; it was just like any other night, nightmares included. which is why you woke up in a cold sweat, practically panting; the only thing illuminating your room was the moon.
Once you had slightly calmed down, you sat up and grabbed your phone. You flinched away from the bright screen until your eyes could adjust, finally seeing that it was around two a.m. You sighed as you unlocked your phone and called Maki. You constantly refused her offer of coming over at times like this, but you always accepted her offer of calling; you’d take what you could get— which could be quite literally everything you want, but alas, you’re not aware of that yet.
Maki hums over the line. “Hey, you ok?”
You hum back. “nightmare.”
Maki clears her throat. “I’ll call you back in, like, ten minutes, maybe, ok?”
You go wide-eyed at her statement, and you can feel your heart drop a bit. Were you bothering her? “I'm sorry, are you busy?”
“Yeah, something like that, but i promise we’ll talk ok?" Maki says goodbye almost too eagerly before hanging up. 
You sigh and practically throw your phone back onto your side table as you flop back down in bed. You knew this day would come, where she’d get annoyed with how you called almost every night, with how you weren’t as self-sufficient as she was, and besides, what could she be doing at two in the morning? You don't know how long you lay there staring at your ceiling, feeling like you wanted the world to swallow you whole, but you know it's been awhile. You probably would have stayed like that until morning if it hadn't been for the knock on your front door bringing you back to your senses.
Your feet dragged as you begrudgingly made your way toward the door, opening it only to see Maki there with a slight tired smile on her face as she held a bag full of things you couldn't quite make out in one hand. Standing there in your pjs, you suddenly felt very vulnerable; yes, she's your best friend, but you didn't want her to see you like this, see you as a person? It would complicate things, complicate your feelings even further. Your face feels hot and blue as the two of you stand there in silence for a few moments. 
“Are you gonna let me in?” she asks flatly with a slight tilt of her head. 
You don't say anything; you just move out of the way and let her in, and she walks toward your room as if she'd been here before, which she hasn't.
“Maki, what are you doing here?” you ask in disbelief as she sits on your bed. 
“Well, I had a feeling you’d call, and I don't know; I thought it would be better for you if I was actually here, right?” She speaks so softly to you, which isn't much of a surprise; Maki was softer in general with you than she was with other people, and it always leaves you with butterflies, it always leaves you with a hope you know you shouldn’t entertain for your own sanity. 
“You could’ve told me,” you huff as you sit next to her on the bed. 
Maki laughs slightly. “Why, so you can tell me not to come? Yeah, right," she says jokingly.
You hum in agreement; she’s right; you'd never willingly let her come. “So what’s in the bag?”
Maki looks at the bag in her hand briefly before placing it on your side table. “Just some snacks; I wasn’t really sure what we’d do when I got here…”
You hum sleepily; you weren’t sleepy a few seconds ago, so why now? Why does just being around Maki soothe you like a lullaby? 
“Or we can lay down,“ she adds when she realizes how droopy your eyes are getting now. 
You don't try to protest her suggestions; you're too tired at this point, and your sole wish is just to lay down with her. You nod and get up to turn off the light you had turned on earlier when you heard the door. While you're up, Maki gets herself comfortable on the far side of the bed, and you quickly join her. The two of you lay there stiffly on your backs, and although you were sleepy and happy in her presence, it's not enough; you need to feel her, be held by her. 
“Maki?” you question meekly. 
“Yeah?” she hums.
“You can totally say no, but, um, do you think you could hold me?” You ask nervously as you fidget with your hands. 
Maki turns her head to look at you and doesn’t say anything; she just smiles sweetly at you while she lifts her arm, which you can see from your peripheral vision; she’s giving you access to lay on her. You look at her wide-eyed briefly before practically scrambling to get your head on her chest, your arm draping over her torso as she brings hers back down to rest on your back. You two lay still for a few moments before she starts to rub her hand up and down your back soothingly, an action she never thought would come naturally to her, yet here she is, and she has to say it might be the best feeling in the world—even better than proving her “family” wrong. 
"Y/N, how come you’ve never let me come over before?” She asks out of the blue, fingers still trailing up and down your back, which, along with the question, sends shivers down your spine that you hope she can’t feel. 
“I don’t know. I guess I’m embarrassed?” You murmur against her. 
“Embarrassed?” she asks, clearly confused. 
You groan slightly. “Haven’t you ever noticed how different we are?” 
Maki tilts her head down slightly to look at you, eyes and eyebrows narrowing at you in confusion. “what?” 
“You’re so self-sufficient, so independent, and I’m what? can’t go a night without a nightmare? need you there for me every night?” You respond back almost bitterly, disgusted by your own needs. 
maki scoffs. "Y/N, you might be more “independent” than I am.” 
“what? "How—I mean, look, you're here because of me!” you exclaim. 
“Did you ask me to be here?” she asks. 
you frown. “well no but-“ 
She cuts you off. “Have you ever asked me to be here?” 
“no…” you reply quietly, unaware of where she’s going with this. 
“exactly! You deal with all your shit by yourself, even when I’ve made it abundantly clear that I’m more than willing to be here for you. maybe you aren’t independent because you want to be, but you’re still independent,” she states matter-of-factly. 
“Isn’t being independent a good thing?” You ask quietly, your voice shaking slightly.
She shrugs slightly, as much as she can with you on top of her. “To an extent, but you can be independent and still let me be here for you; they aren’t mutually exclusive.”
You nuzzle your face into her and sigh. This is nice—nicer than you could’ve ever expected. Cuddling with Maki while she rubs her hand up and down your spine, comforting you in more ways than one, is something you could only dream about, but your dreams don’t even come close to this; the real thing is so much better. and suddenly you're clutching her shirt as words fly out of your mouth faster than you can keep up.
“Maki, I like you,” you murmur against her considering your face is practically shoved into her, almost like you're trying to become one with her, which to be honest, you kinda are.
She stifles a laugh. “i know.” 
You shake your head and reiterate, “No, I like you.” 
She hums and repeats, “I know.”
You blink a few times before you abruptly lift your head to look at her. “wait what?” 
She nods and smiles at you. “Oh yeah, I’ve known for a long time.” 
“How?” you exclaim. 
“You’re very obvious,” she replies nonchalantly. 
“And- And you’re okay with it?” You ask nervously, this was not how you were expecting your night to go at all. You were expecting to just call Maki for a little bit until you inevitably felt like you were bothering her and hung up, but not before she tells you she’s more than willing to go over, but you say no, and then you’d stare out your window until you eventually fell back asleep and maybe or maybe not get woken back up from another nightmare. That’s how you were expecting this night to go.
“Of course I’m okay with it; I like you too, moron,” she replies back playfully. 
You try to stop your mouth from dropping open, but to no avail; you’re absolutely shocked. You would have never guessed that she liked you back—okay, maybe you could considering how soft she was with you compared to everyone else, but that’s just how best friends are, right? Oh my god, are you seriously trying to convince yourself that she still sees you as just a friend when she just confessed otherwise? you’re insane.
Sometime while you were lost in thought, staring at Maki with your jaw dropped, she brought her free hand that wasn’t caressing your back up and shut your jaw for you, her hand on your face quickly bringing you back to earth.
You clear your throat and blink a few times before stumbling over your words, “So, uh, um, what now?” 
She hums and pretends to think for a moment. 
“Well, I think now you won’t ever have to sleep alone.” 
☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。
“If you tell anyone about me cuddling you, I’ll kill you, by the way,” she adds on not even a few moments later. 
You giggle before littering kisses on her face, speaking through the kisses, “Yeah, I know.” 
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© LITTLEXBIMBO
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rinhaler · 3 months
Note
Rin had you sprawled out on the expensive boucle couch he helped you pick out when the house was still being built. He gave mercy on your thighs, his usual iron grip replaced with feathery fingers gently keeping your legs spread, one hand caressing the soft skin of your leg, the other splayed across your mound with a skilled thumb teasing your clit back and forth. Soft, breathy moans bleed from your spit glossed lips, lifting your hips a little of the seat, his head that rests on your other thigh follows the movement.
“Please Rin, pleasepleaseplease, more baby, I want you so bad,” you couldn’t help but to be a pathetic, desperate mess even though he was barely toying with you. It was just already too much and not enough at the same time. You finally had your closest, most dear friend right where you wanted him.
Rin’s so fucking lost in your dripping cunt he can barely make sense of your pleas, but the better, more intuned half of him takes hold of your words and musters a reply. “I know you fucking do, hang on, honey, I’m getting to it.” He chuckles, so damn cocky, and you can’t stop the smile from taking over your face. Any type of laughter he ever grants you is a gift, something he really only reserves for you. His lips place a wet smack near the crevice of your thighs, so close yet still so far away from where you need him the most.
He runs a shaky hand through his hair, before bringing it up to cup the underside of your breasts. “You had me drooling like a fuckin’ dog,” he begins, meanly twisting one of your nipples, trying to catch his breath and not look pathetic, “before I even had your panties off, so I’m gonna make sure you’re begging and crying until I give this pretty little pussy what she wants, you understand me?” Keeping his dominance, he spanks your cunt once, then twice, earning a high pitched whine from you.
You dumbly nod your head, “Yes, sir!!” The words leave you much too quickly for your liking, trying so hard to keep your regular cool composure, but let’s be honest, that went out the fucking window as soon as he gave you the right wrong look.
-
Hehehehehehehe I’m drunk n high I literally just wrote this in ur ask box lmfaoooo, I love writing under the influence it’s so nice 🤩 question/ statement: I totally think Rin would be a stoner if his gf was, like he can’t NOT participate with you when u get even more giggly and touchy than usual….thoughts? Luv uuuuuuu :D ‼️‼️ 🧋
⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH THIS IS SO GOOD MY TOES ARE CURLING MY HEART IS POUNDING I'M SPEECHLESS HELP MEEEEEE omg I cannot wait for the full fic I'm DYING
also the fact that you wrote this in my ask box is making me think of when you'd let a friend doodle on your arm during class 😭😭 so cute
I'm so in love with this man and you're FUELLING ME LIKE CRAAAAZY omg thank you so much for the food.
In regards to Rin smoking I think obviously it depends on the AU or circumstance or whatever but whenever I think of Rin having a girlfriend I like to think he's really possessive and controlling. (This is very specific to me and my desires so please take with a pinch of salt). But I don't think he's a smoker and I think he'd actually be very against it and demand you not to smoke either. I like the idea of him punishing you for disobeying too 😏😏😏 I just think him and Sae are from a quite well to do family and I think he takes his career as a footballer too seriously to dabble in smoking.
Anyway that's just one scenario, obviously skater boy loser boy stoner boy would be way more into it than my iteration!
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fictarian · 11 months
Note
kind of a niche(?) request, but hcs for hobie with a spider s/o who has an ability like ant man (shrinking down to the size of a spider) and usually spies on other people? thank you !! >_<
𝐇𝐢𝐦 <𝟑 . ⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ 𝐏𝐭. 𝟗
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ღ I’m actually so obsessed with this request, I literally couldn’t wait until I got back home to write it 😭 While on the trip, I was brainstorming headcannons so I could be prepared. Shoutout to my followers who are under 5’6 😝 (I’m kidding ily you guys)
ღ No cause we’re already at 129 followers and I find that so CRAZY, WHERE DID YOU GUYS COME FROM????
ღ Hope you guys like my new theme 😈😈😈 I’ll try my best and keep it for at least a week LOL
ღ Previous part can be found here !
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• Even before you two started dating, Hobie had incorporated a small pocket in his jacket for you to ride in whenever you activated your ability. He always used it to sneak you into meetings that you weren’t invited to, but eventually, Miguel caught on to your guys’ scheme and told Hobie to not wear that specific jacket to meetings anymore.
• …So instead he incorporated a pocket on his boot LMFAOO
• Due to hanging around you so much, Hobie has gotten a sixth sense of knowing exactly where you are when you’re spider size. Bro is literally playing ‘Where’s Waldo’ when it comes to you LMFAOOOO.
• You had made it your personal goal to become unnoticeable to Hobie whenever you enter a room, but alas, he somehow ALWAYS manages to spot you.
“Y’know I can see you, right luv?”
“fuck you, no you can’t”
• Right before you guys head to your own respective missions, you always run up to him in little form (you’re much faster when you’re small), switch to normal size, and press a goodbye kiss on his cheek before switching again and running into the portal your wrist watch made.
• You two barley have any time between missions to properly give each other affection, so you always make sure to AT LEAST give him a quick kiss on the cheek, or even a hug if you have time.
• But anyways, back to the topic of spying.
• When you’re small, you’re practically invisible. AND BETTER YET, you can go anywhere you want.
• What does this mean? You have all the latest news and gossip, and when I mean all, I mean ALL.
• Like, you know everything that’s going on. And who gets to hear all about it? Hobie obviously.
• AND BRO EATS THAT SHIT UP!!!
• Hobie’s just tuning his guitar, when suddenly, you’re at his side on the couch with your legs propped on his lap.
“Hm?”
“You will not believe what Jessica said about Miguel behind his back”
“…Go on”
• Now intrigued, Hobie pulls on your ankles until you’re then sitting on his lap, giving you his full attention RAHHHH.
• You’d rant about everything you heard that day, and Hobie would listen with a small smile on his face, his chin on top of your head while his larger hand traced shapes on yours.
• Not even 30 minutes went by, and he had stopped paying attention to what you were saying, instead focusing on your voice. Hobie loved how fast you spoke when you got excited, how easily you lost your train of thought when you thought of something more interesting you heard that day…
“Are you even listening to what i’m saying?”
“‘M sorry luv, got distracted”
“Hobie!”
tag list ! @zalayni @luvstarrstruck @jrrantss @pixqlsin @kairiscorner @k4tsu3 @asmobeuses @maxoloqy @miirene @nokkihy
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subarashiihibi · 4 months
Text
my thing about izaya is that he's so strange and weird and i love that so much. i didn't want to ramble too much in the notes of that poor person's post but i find the way he speaks and the words he chooses so interesting so let me ramble a little bit. this may or may not even be coherent so bear with me here im just going to speak my thoughts.
ok this got really fucking long and all over the 0place so im putting this under a read more sorry.
so i have volume 9 of the novel in both english and japanese. i only have two novels in japanese and that is this one and yuuyake wo. so i'm pretty crazy about this izaya speech analysis shit. anyways i was rereading thru the jp ver the other day just to compare it to the eng and i kinda realized that like.
a lot of people you can separate their speech in either formal and informal speech right? someone like shizuo speaks really informally and uses a lot of rough, dragged-out versions of words and stuff (しゃーねえ vs しょうがない) and then someone like shinra who speaks in a ton of yojijukugo and generally sounds like a nerd emoji gijinka.
izaya on the other hand rly... doesn't fit in either? i mean sure he sounds like another nerd emoji gijinka but it's kinda different. it's not so much the words he speaks but rather the intonation and his tone...
and he has his moments where he speaks pretty seriously and whatnot of course, but in general he just... doesn't sound very human when he speaks? i don't know if that's a conscious effort or not. is it his attempts at distancing himself from his own individual humanity? or is it just because he's a weird guy? i dunno. but it's interesting nonetheless.
one thing i will note though is that despite his somewhat inhuman speech patterns, it's also pretty...dramatic? to the extent where it's really exaggerated but also very cute and charming. (this part is important.)
i think a lot of what makes izaya's speech so weirdly inhuman is because he doesn't really use a lot of slang or similar lingo that people his age would typically use. i know mikado said in the novels that he doesn't really try to fit in with his age group's fashion sense either so it makes sense but still. he's like an old hag it's so funny. and it's because of that that when he says stuff like 'i don't get all hot and heavy over headless women' or whatever he said to celty it's really amusing to me because like... why is the strange man saying this?💀
another example i kinda giggled about on my twitter when i read it it's not even crazy and i sound corny and cheesy and stupid but theres this scene in vol 9 where izaya messages celty for business and hold on let me just put it as a quote.
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he sounds so old saying 'video game' like 😭 idk it's just funny cause he barely even knows anything abt games like bro knows nothing im crying
in the jp hes like 「…ゲーム中なのかい?」 and then when celty tries to explain herself he says 「何を言ってるのか、良く解らないんだけど」 and im rly bad at tling parts of sentences and stuff but just know that the way he words it makes it sound like this gif to me
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i love both versions i think the original jp makes him sound like hes so lost and confused (hence why pw gif cause lord that man always looks lost LMFAOOOO) and then eng tl just blunt ass "I don't know what you're talking about." makes him sound like full on hag 😭😭😭
OMFG WAIT I HAVE TO MENTION THIS FUCKING SCENE WITH SHINRA ITS SO FUNNY.
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first i think it's funny the translation has izaya say fuck here cause he very rarely swears and i did read this one thing about how he only swears when his mask slips so to me this is like genuine bewilderment that he cant even hide LOL. second why is he so excited to hear about 'whatever sexual fetish' shinra has im crying he's so damn nosy . okay but this is not the funniest part let me add that now.
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???
ehy the hell is izaya orihara talking about foot fetishes???😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 im crying bruh i was so flabbergasted when i read this i was like WHAT did he just say? he says it in the jp ver too which just makes it even funnier. this goes back to what i said earlier but i always get so amused when izaya has something to say about sex or whatever cause he's so fucking weird and unsettling why does he know that
(i mean i also get so hard i nearly pass out thinking about izaya tlaking about sex but thats probably just a thing with my heart condition and stuff)
oh also another scene i think is really cute and amusing and funny is back when shinra was first still trying to get izaya to form the bio club w him.
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1. shinra is funny as fuck in this scene but also izaya's "Hmm. Can I punch you?" made me havbe a good laugh. in the jp he says 「んー。殴ってもいいのかな?」 which is pretty much the same thing just with the intonation of like 'hmmmmmmmmm should i hit u or not...' sorry like i said im just bad w explaining this stuff. but i felt the need to point it out not cause im one of those annoying ppl who praise the original jp ver and reject translations and localizations i just think it's important for izaya specifically cause i love him and i want to analyze his speech patterns as best as i can.
i was going thru the novel just now for other stuff i wanted to mention and i forgot abt this part but it's so funny.
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'Let's not get hasty. Type calmly, please.' its not even funny or nothing i just find it so amusinf whenever he talks like that💀 i will say though the english translation kind of makes him sound more weird and inhuman than the original. that line in the original was basically just him telling her she needs to calm down enough to at least type properly LOL. idk if im just being nitpicky cause this is izaya tho so feel free to ignore that. fwiw i like the eng tl bc while it's a different intonation than the original japanese ver i think if he did speak english it would probably sound smth like that anyways.
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this too made me laugh like ??? seriously he is really nosy when it comes to people's intimate affairs. in the jp ver he calls them an 'intimate couple' which just is like .. ok bro💀
does anyone else see my vision of izaya getting cucked by celty (does it count as cucking when celtys the one dating shinra) while he looks sad and pathetic and miserable that he never decided to shoot his shot w shinra back in the day
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if i were commenting on the actual stuff going on in this scene rn this post would be a lot olonger and even more terribly all over the place so im just gonna focus on how i think it's funny izaya says 'easy, man...' this is like one of the only times his words are somewhat natural and sound like smth you would hear someone else say. in the jp ver it's 「おいおい…」 which is somewhat less out of left field in terms of coming from izaya but still it's pretty surprisingly normal. i have to wonder if in that moment he's too worried about shinra to care about keeping up appearances.
this is just random and me making fun of izaya as usual but why the hell does he weigh himself after his showers💀💀💀 it's cute and endearing and only adds to his strong gap moe but still... it's strange...
speaking of cute things this is from a volume i forget but he says this one phrase a couple of times and it is just both really cute and also kind of idk... saddening. one of the times i can remember he says it is when namie was making fun of him or something and he replies 'Don't tease me. I'm only human.' or something along those lines and it's like . hm. ok.
i think it's cute he says 'dont tease me' a few times cause eughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (trying to ward off severe brain damaged incoherent thoughts) but 'im only human' is like... are you really? even after you try so hard to escape your own humanity and individual self so much... im going to try and give my thoughts on it here but this is just based off my hc that izaya has bpd so yanno. im basing a lot oif this on my own experiences sorry. i do that a lot. (gestures over to all the posts i make abt fob/mychem fan izaya)
when it comes to just straight up acknowledging his humanity izaya has no problems with this because 'sure, i'm human. isn't that obvious?' is probably something along the lines of what he thinks. it's easy for him to just say that because it's just that. it's just words. it holds no real meaning and shows no true insight into how he actually perceives himself. but when it comes to actually having to come face to face with his own humanity and the fact that yes, he is only human, it's a lot more difficult because now it's out of his control. i wonder also if he has problems with perceiving his own self.
i say this a lot but i truly do believe izaya is so so so beautiful and i love him so much. also i just saw a funny post on twitter so i wanna say this here idk if yall know this but izayas actually a latina hes got chismosavirus❤ ok thats all i have to say sorry for rambling so much
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fatuismooches · 10 months
Note
The thought of Dottore having a really hot lover is so funny to me😭
JUST IMAGINE
Reader, being really chill but also really hot, resulting in people asking them out left and right (they always reject them since they want to find someone who truly gets them) and the one they end up dating? Fucking. Dottore.
And I know he's canonically handsome, but I'm choosing to ignore that and make him a gross rat in an oddly beautiful way😌
I can just imagine akademiya Zandik (aka Dottore<3) and akademiya reader walking up to him, wanting to ask him for advice on something(?) And Zandik just looks at them like 🤨....😳 DAMN-
"Fucking. Dottore." THAT MADE ME GIGGLE LMFAOOOO 😭😭 I can't imagine being someone trying to hit on reader and reader's like "sorry i have a bf." Dude is like "oh really? i bet i can treat you better than him." Guess who pops up behind right you after that? Fucking. Dottore. And the person is regretting all their life choices but is wondering how the HELL you chose that crazy ass man are you okay? Are you being blackmailed? Threatened??!! Or are you crazy yourself? So many questions...
I think that in-game, people finding Zandik attractive is kind of like... an acquired taste, if that makes sense? He's the kind of guy no one would ever find attractive until they spend some with him, and then they realize up close, that he's not that bad...
I personally think Zandik isn't one to care much about physical appearance, not in a partner either, because he finds non-physical traits far more attractive (intelligence, cunningness, etc) and also because he knows looks can have nothing to do with personality. This is Dottore after all lol, his standards for a lover are um... different from an average person. But i like to think that as time goes on, once he really likes you for who you are, he slowly realizes that hey, you're actually quite stunning on the outside, until it just hits him one day. From then on i think it gives him a huge ego boost when someone as hot as you is with him.
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desceros · 1 month
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Hi, you probably don't remember me, but I'm the 🪻 anon that sent asks once or twice. Still very much a nervous fan! Your work and the way you write about your experiences and feelings still positively stun me every time I read your posts.
I've been thinking about writing for the tmnt and rottmnt universes for a while now, but I'm still very uncertain about my own interpretation of these characters. If it isn't too much to ask, I'd like to know how you do it??
Your work has such fluidity and... sense?? I don't really quite know how to put it into words, but it inspires me very much! Anyway, I guess I'm asking for writing tips?? I know each interpretation is unique and our own, but I can't help but adore yours! I hope you're having a good day/night, Ms. Desceros!
Ps: English is not my first language, so sorry if my rambling aren't really coherent. (〒 u 〒⁠)
– 🪻
i do very much remember! and i'm so sorry i had this sitting in my inbox for forever and a day lmfaoooo i didn't want to rush the answer and instead give it proper thought/answer for you! :D
so it sounds like you're asking two different things here, which is 1) how do i establish strong characters, and 2) how do i construct flow in a fic.
characterization
for characters, it starts pretty simply with just consuming a lot of the character. for example, with the turtles, i've watched rise and bayverse both a lot. like, a lot a lot. enough that i can hear their voices in my head when i'm writing, because i've heard them so much.
specifically, i've watched it not just casually, but also with the ears of a writer. what words do each of the turtles use? how do they phrase things? when one of them gets annoyed, how does he communicate it? when they're scared, what do they say? how do they move their bodies? what do they do in the background of scenes where they aren't the focus?
once you feel like you kind of know the answers to those questions, the next step is just to write! i probably have about... hm... 30-50k of fic in my icloud that i wrote before i started posting things. the purpose of it was just to figure out how i liked the turtles to sound. because i write them as older adults, they sound just a little different than they do in the show. i inject my headcanons into their voices. these things change how they act, and i fiddled with it until i was happy with it. knowing i wasn't going to publish these made it really easy for me to get creative and push things, until i found the boundaries that i like and that feel good for me.
flow
so good flow is something that really comes with a lot of experience writing. it's one of those things you... pick up as you write a lot, so this part is going to be a bit more. hm. disconnected. nuanced. how you like things paced, how things feel good under your fingers; these are things you'll get better at as you go on. that said, it's something i've very consciously worked on myself, so i do have a few tips for you that'll hopefully speed up that process for you!
my biggest tip is to READ. find authors (fiction and fanfiction!) you like, and READ them. but again, we're not doing it recreationally, we're doing it as a writer.
read your favorite authors and think. think about the things they include and what they don't. what information do they convey in great detail? what information do they convey in exposition? what information do they leave for you to garner on your own? why do you like how they include things? why do you like what they don't? do you miss certain things? do you wish they wouldn't bother with others?
for example, i really love brining in the emotions of a scene. how something makes a character feel. basking in that is something i really love reading, so i have a lot of it in my writing. and i enjoy doing it without Telling you how someone feels. i don't say "donnie is sad." i tell you how his shoulders slump. how he gazes off to the side with a listless expression. how his eyes cloud over with uncertainty. these are things i've enjoyed reading, and so i've incorporated into my writing. i will slow down the flow of my fic, putting a bit of rubato on these moments, because i like how it feels.
i personally enjoy things to be very fluid, connecting from one scene to the next with as little a break as possible. think of french vs english. french is very fluid, english is very percussive. they're both languages, both good, they just sound different to the ear. part of constructing that, for me, means i write from beginning to end without skipping around. it's a style that has its pros and cons, but it allows me to have a single thread, unbroken, though the entire work.
ultimately, your writing is a stained glass of everything you love. the words you think are pretty, the turns of phrase that catch your eye, the verbs that bring action to life. this is the foundation of what people will call your "voice," and a large part of that is your flow, or pacing. i can't really... tell you how to create your stained glass. but this is how you can create your own, and make it something you find beautiful.
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