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daydreamingatnight209 · 1 month

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Me actually writing and posting? What??? 😱😱😱

Enjoy some Colson content my lovelies 🥰

As usual Feedback is welcome, HATE is not ; if you don’t like it, don’t read it. ✨💕

“I’m Here, Go Back to Sleep”

MGK x Female Reader

Warnings - None. Just pure fluff!

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Waking up to an empty bed these days wasn’t unusual these days, with the album deadline slowly creeping up day by day, Colson spent almost all of his hours in the studio, working himself to the bone to produce an album everyone can enjoy.

With your own workplace continuously overworking you, sleep or time didn’t come easily to you either. You couldn’t remember the last time both you and Colson had actually spent more than a few minutes at a time together in the same room and it was starting to become very lonely.

Leaving the cold and empty bed, after another night of hopeless tossing and turning, you sigh and drag yourself downstairs to the kitchen. Preparing for another day to survive on coffee you make one for both yourself and your boyfriend who didn’t even leave the studio last night. It was most likely he fell asleep there in the very early hours of the morning.

While the lack of sleep wasn’t new for Colson, it certainly was for you and you could feel it slowly starting to affect your mind and body.

You grab him a change of clothes, a blanket for yourself and his favourite aftershave before crossing over from the house into the converted studio space.

With the band already in session, you slipped in almost undetected, but as always, your eyes caught Colson’s immediately. You give him a small smile and walk over to give him what you had brought over.

“Babe, what are you doing up so early? You look exhausted” he whispers as he presses a gentle kiss to your forehead.

You let out a small laugh and set yourself down on the closest chair.

“Gee, thanks Col”

After a quick clothes change and the others leaving in search for food, Colson calls you over to the desk he’s working at.

“Come, let me hold you” he mumbles, stretching his long arms out in your direction.

Wrapping the blanket tightly around you, you walk over to your lover and wrap yourself around him so you were straddling him. He holds you tightly and sways gently.

“You need to get some proper rest, baby, you are going to make yourself ill” he tells you softly.

You giggle to yourself at his concern for you, knowing full well he wouldn’t take his own advice even if you begged him.

“I’ll rest when you do” is your answer and you can practically feel him rolling his eyes at you, despite not actually being able to see him as you rest your head in the crook of his neck.

The two of you sit there quietly, as colson continues to sway you and hum a track from the new album into your ear.

Despite not being able to sleep properly, something about being in colson’s arms after so long, settles you and you cannot fight the call of sleep that beckons you. Your eyes close slowly and without protest as you rest against the frame of your man, the feeling of safely enveloping you.

Colson smiles down at you, tenderly, the look of frustration and stress leaving your features as you snore lightly.

He would be lying to himself if he said he hadn’t missed these small intimate moments with you and did feel quite guilty for not making more time for you while in the process of doing this next album. You never once complained and took everything in your stride which is on of the many things he loved about you.

He couldn’t wait to look after you and treat you to something special as a way of thanks for all your support when the album was complete.

His train of thought was interrupted as he heard everyone coming back to continue the session. He panicked slightly as they all barged through the door and glared at them in an effort to silence the rowdiness they were currently displaying.

“Shhh! She hasn’t slept properly in weeks and I swear if any one of you wake her up! …” Colson hisses at his friends, before looking down at you to ensure you were still peacefully sleeping.

Slim is the first to put his hands up in mock surrender, a smirk plastered on his face as he leads the group back out the door, but he was secretly glad that this would mean Colson would be forced to take a break, even if it was just an hour or so. He knew he definitely needed one.

Once alone again, Colson lifts you up with ease and carries you over to the sofa, laying you down and climbing in beside you. He wraps his arms back around you settles in. The movement causes you to stir slightly, your eyes still closed you mumble for your boyfriend not to leave you.

“Shh baby, I’m here, go back to sleep”

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i-think-i-did-it-again · 8 months

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The Tour V

Warning: swearing, smut

This day is shit. Actually shit is an understatement for how the day is. You know you look like complete and utter crap the next day but you don’t care. Everyone stays away from you, including Colson, and to be perfectly honest with yourself, it was fucking lonely. You know that everyone is pretty wrapped up in the tour and therefore doesn’t have a whole lot of spare time to deal with your personal existential crisis but you were pretty disappointed that when everyone returned from interviews and publicity appearances, no one ventured into your room to talk. You’re still not even sure how Colson got into your room last night and it’s eating you alive.

You get a text from Ashleigh around 5:30, informing you that everyone is heading out to dinner at 6 and if you feel up to joining. You don’t even get a chance to respond before Rook comes blinding into your room.

“Seriously, how is everyone doing that?!” you screech as you rush for a pair of pants to throw on.

“Doing what?” he asks with a goofy grin and an eye roll at your reaction.

“Getting into my room without me letting them?” you kick him off your bed with a shove which just makes him roll his eyes again but he saunters over to the sofa.

“Ashleigh gets extras of everyone’s room keys in case we lose them and get locked out of our room or if we slept through our alarm.”

Wait, so Ashleigh knows Colson came in last night?

The thought terrifies you because you can’t really think of a reason as to why Colson would need to come into your room at 2am. What did he tell her to get the key without her asking questions? If there’s one thing you know about him, it’s that he’s not one for answering questions he doesn’t want to.

Or for sticking around after sex.

“What the hell is going on in that brain of yours?” Rook looks seriously concerned as he watches you stand in the middle of the room.

“I…”

You’re desperate to say the words out loud. To tell someone so you don’t feel completely alone and lost in your feelings but you’re conflicted. Rook is not only your best friend but Colson’s too. You don’t want to put him in an uncomfortable position but you worry that you may suffocate trying to keep this to yourself.

“Colson and I had sex last night and then he took off when I went to use the bathroom without so much as a thank you.”

Rook’s face drops and his skin pales. He sits there staring at you for what feels like forever. He closes his mouth and opens it so many times he genuinely looks like a fish. You need him to say something, anything!

“I’m gonna fucking kill him!” he growls, jumping to his feet and striding to the door. You quickly jump in front of him, blocking him from the door.

“No, please don’t do anything!” you beg but Rook has that murderous look in his eyes that makes you nervous.

“Get the fuck out of my way Y/N!”

“Rook,” your bottom lip quivers and his face softens slightly.

“Aw honey.”

He wraps his arms around you and pulls you to him, desperately trying to comfort you. Rook hates when you cry because it happens so rarely, he’s always unsure of how to go about it. He pulls you towards your bed and you sit next to him while he rubs circles on your back. You tell him everything. About the couch, the kiss, him coming to your room. Once you start talking it’s like word vomit. You tell him how conflicted you are, how you’re stuck between wanting to wring his neck and runaway to lick your wounds, alone.

“Has he said anything about why he’s been in such a shitty mood lately?” Rook finally says after a few moments of silence.

“That’s your takeaway from everything I just told you?” you’re completely dumbfounded and your tone conveys that clearly.

“I’m sorry it’s just you’re the first person he’s properly spent any time with in months, I thought maybe it would come up.”

“Yeah in between orgasms he told me his biggest, darkest secrets and we bonded while he braided my hair.”

“Ok, point taken! And don’t ever mention your orgasms to me again.”

You roll your eyes because sometimes you think Rook forgets you’re a woman who has sex. To him, it’s like picturing your little sister having sex. A knock on the door interrupts your banter and you stand to answer it. You’re surprised to find Colson on the other side, looking at his feet and you peer over your shoulder to see Rook visibly tense.

“Are you coming to dinner?” Colson asks, still not looking at you. You can feel the glare Rook is shooting at him because it’s boring into your back.

“I…I don’t know, I’m not that hungry.”

“Listen Y/N,” Colson finally looks up and spots Rook over your shoulder. “Oh, hey man. I didn’t know you were in here.”

“I came to get her for dinner,” Rook’s voice is tight, like he’s barely managing to keep himself calm.

You look between the two of them, feeling the tension building in your chest as they stare at each other. Neither of them makes any attempt to lighten the mood and the atmosphere is physically suffocating you. You have to remind yourself to breathe and you let out a breath you were holding. Rook’s eyes twitch to your face before looking back at Colson, daggers in his eyes.

“Couldn’t keep your fucking mouth shut for at least 24 hours, huh?” Colson shoots his own daggers at you and your stomach drops.

“Don’t fucking talk to her like that!” Rook is across the room and in Colson’s face in seconds.

Even though Rook is a head shorter than Colson, he could definitely hold his own in a fight. You step between the two of them, both their chests rising and falling against your shoulders as you squeeze your way into the small space they allow. Rook relaxes as you stand between them as you knew he would. He would never put you in harm's way and getting in a punch on with you so close would do exactly that.

“I’m not hungry,” you mumble to no one in particular just as Baze and Slim come to your door.

“Jesus, what the fuck is going on in here?” Baze jokes but when no one laughs, he scratches the back of his neck nervously.

“I’m not coming to dinner,” you answer him as Rook moves away. You can tell by the look on his face that he wants to stay with you and be a good friend but he’s torn because you’re sure he’s starving. “You go Rook, order a big steak for me.”

“Pfft, not like you could afford one,” Colson mutters under his breath.

Slim, Baze and Rook’s mouths all drop open. That was below the belt, even for him, especially in front of everyone. Rook looks like he wants to beat the shit out of him and Baze and Slim look like they want to hold Colson down so he can get as many hits in as possible. You square your shoulders and lift your head high as you look directly at Colson.

“Ooo, pointing out my lack of funds, real original asshole. At least if I had money, I wouldn’t waste it on alcohol, drugs and hookers. Unlike some people, I don’t need to pay to have others in my company. I get it all for free.” you punctuate each word so what you’re saying really sinks in for him.

Yeah all these people are my friends because they want to be, not because I pay their salary.

“Fuck you,” he spits at you before turning on his heels and heading back to his room, slamming the door behind him.

After your big blow up with Colson, everyone pretty much scrambled as soon as he left. Rook gave you one last hug before heading with the guys to dinner. You were completely fuming at what he’d said. Why is the money thing such a big deal to him? Is he pissed that you’re making money off him by simply being on the tour as his personal babysitter? Maybe it bothers him that the record label felt the need to hire you to keep him on track. It is kind of insulting considering he’s a grown man.

You decide it’s driving you insane just sitting around your hotel room so you decide to get ready for the concert earlier than planned. The cars aren’t leaving until 8 for a start time of 9:30 but you decide you might head to the restaurant everyone else is at for a drink. You hop in a boiling hot shower, washing your hair and shaving your legs twice to help drain some time. As you look down at your bruised breasts, your mind drifts to Colson and his lips on your skin. You hadn’t noticed until you were undressing for your shower that his fingers had left bruises on your hips from when he held you down as he ate you out. Your nipples harden at the thought and you have to push the images away.

Be mad at him.

When you get out of the shower, you blowdry your hair and run the straightener over it. You go heavier than usual on your makeup but it always makes you feel more confident when you’re all dolled up and you don’t want Colson to see how much he affects you. You wrap the towel around your body as you step out of the bathroom to pick your outfit. You stop dead when you spot a shirtless Colson lying on your bed, arms behind his back, his eyes staring at the ceiling. A cigarette hangs from his pink lips and your insides quiver.

“Why the fuck does everyone keep inviting themselves into my room?” you spit at him.

He doesn’t look at you and you fold your arms over your chest, pushing your tits up a little. His eyes zero in on that movement and you suddenly feel very self-conscious that there’s nothing but a towel between your body and his eyes.

“Only sluts wear red lipstick,” he muses, staring at your chest and your face heats with embarrassment. You square your shoulders and think of a quick retort.

“As I remember, I wasn’t exactly a saint in that bed last night.” His jaw twitches and you see a flicker of lust cross his face as he looks at you again.

Hmm interesting.

“Pretty sure I remember you moaning my name as I came all over your dick, begging me to call you daddy.”

He growls and swings his legs over the bed to face you. You stroll over to him, hips swinging, tits bouncing with every step. His hands are clenched so tight that you can see nothing but white on his knuckles. His eyes are large as he stares at you, lips parted slightly, his chest rising and falling as you stand in front of him, his face directly at chest height. You see him inhale deeply and his eyes flutter. You’re enjoying this game you’re playing with him way too much to stop, even though you know you should.

“Left all those marks on my tits and my hips so I’d remember exactly who I spent the night with. Exactly who ate my pussy so well that I creamed all over his face, like the slutty sinner I am, right daddy?”

A mix between a guttural moan and a snarl erupts from his throat and his lips are on yours, slamming you against the wall. He strips the towel from your body, throwing it behind him. He presses his body to yours, rubbing his hard cock against your bare pussy. You moan into his mouth, the friction heaven on your dripping pussy. As much as you’re enjoying the feeling of being pressed up against the wall, you want to be in control. You put your hand in the centre of his chest and push with force. He stumbles back, falling back on the bed with a thump. Before he can react you’re on him, straddling him. You grind your hips down so you’re rubbing over his growing erection. You flick his jeans open, pulling his briefs down just enough to release his cock. Your mouth salivates at the sight of him. He’s so large in your hand, you’re suddenly intimidated.

How the hell did that fit last night?

You drop to your knees, licking the purple head tasting his precum. He moans your name as you swirl your tongue around. The thick veins in his dick throb as you tease him. You lick underneath from the base to the tip and back down. You take him in your mouth, sucking in your cheeks to create a deep suction. The top half of Colson’s body reels up and he stares down at you between his legs, wrapping your hair around his hand and pushing you down. You gag but push deeper until you can feel him down your throat.

“Jesus fucking Christ baby,” he whines as you bob your head up and down, creating a comfortable pace that has him panting and swearing.

You want to stop. A loud voice in your head is screaming at you to stop. The game you started has taken a completely different turn and you don’t know if you can bring yourself to follow through. The throb in your pussy is begging you to satisfy her but your ego is desperate to teach Colson a lesson. Right as he’s on the edge, the precipice just within reach as you continue to work him with your hand and your mouth, red lipstick smearing his cock, you pull away. You stand, dabbing around your mouth to clean away your saliva and fix your lipstick.

“I should probably get dressed,” you smile down at him sweetly, licking your lips to be cruel.

“What the fuck?” he exclaims and the look in his eyes is pure murder. “You’re just going to leave me throbbing for you like this?” that sentences makes your pussy quiver with desire but you tell her to calm the fuck down.

“Why give you something for free?” you call over your shoulder and disappear into the bathroom, locking the door behind you.

Take that motherfucker.

#colson baker #machine gun kelly #mgk #tickets to my downfall #mgk imagine #ttmdf #colson x reader #colson baker imagine #machine gun kelly imagine #mgk x reader #mgk x y/n #mgkxx #mgk smut #mgk fanfic #colson baker smut #colson baker x reader #colson baker fanfic

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kissgunkelly · 2 years

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PETE DAVIDSON RANDOM icons

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papercuts33 · 6 months

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.Roulette With My Heart.

Pairings: Colson Baker x Reader.

Warnings / Content: Alcohol, Mild Blood, Mild Violence, Gambling, Cheating, Suggestive Terms.

(Y/N) placed another card down on the wooden table, facing another game of roulette. They were slowly climbing to the top of this game, yet wasting their life away. Their lips curl upwards into a small smile, complacent lines trace the futures of their beautiful face. Another card is flipped upwards on the table, spades.

“Better luck next time,” (Y/N) laughs weakly, waving their hand slightly at those trying to grab the cash from their hand. “I told y’all, better luck next time.” (Y/N) hisses between their teeth, venom drips from their slow yet firm words.

They turn around to walk out of the casino, but without warning, the grip of someone’s hand grabs for them from the darkness. (Y/N) muffles a scream as the figure places a hand over their mouth. “(Y/N), it’s me. Colson Baker.”

“Well, I’ll be, it’s Colson.” (Y/N) mocks, as Colson pushes them out into the back alleyway. Colson shoves (Y/N) against the brick wall as (Y/N) violently recoils with a flinch. “Cole, what the heck are you doing?!”

Colson’s calloused hands gently release (Y/N) neck. He leans inward to kiss (Y/N) with a slight restlessness, they fall into Colson’s firm embrace. “Where… the heck have you been?!” (Y/N) whispers, tears freckling in their eyes. In all honesty, they really hadn’t missed Colson at all. Yet, now that he is home... They never wanted him to leave.

“London, New York...” Colson states, he leans away and lights a cigarette. “Tour has kept us away for far too long.” He takes a puff of his cigarette, then leans in and kisses them much more roughly. His lips taste like the salt of tears. Of the bitterness of lost love. Of smoky cigarettes.

“Let me buy you a drink,” Colson offers, taking their pale hand into his own as he leads them back into the bustling bar.

“Depends on what kind of drink,” (Y/N) says darkly, engulfed by a wave of drunken people inside the bar. Colson gently protects them with his extended arm as they hurry through the thick mobs of people.

Finally, they make their way towards a small, wooden bar table in the back. Colson motions towards the obviously broken bar stool, (Y/N) cautiously takes a seat on it as it protests with loud squeaks. Colson sits down right next to (Y/N), the gaze of his ocean blue eyes vacantly set on studying the neon menu board.

“What are you in the mood for, babe?” Colson asks, slapping a wad of cash down upon the wooden table. His lips turn into a smirk. He calls out for a shot of whiskey and it’s immediately delivered to the table.

“Get me a cocktail.” (Y/N) demands sassily, their lips curl into a smirk as well - they reach over and grab for Colson’s calloused hand. “How long are you gonna stay now?” (Y/N) teases, they know he won’t stay for long - again, they don’t really understand how or why they missed him, he always plays roulette with their heart.

“You never know with me, baby.” Colson says he's still smirking in a way that causes (Y/N) stomach to churn inside. He squeezes their hand back and leans forward to press kisses on their temple.

A bartender walks over and places a cocktail glass onto the table - (Y/N) reaches for it and takes a long sip of the fruity concoction before glancing back up at Colson.

“Heard you’re with a new girl?” (Y/N) murmurs, they’re not particularly surprised - Colson has finished his shot of whiskey and stares blankly at the empty glass - (Y/N) taps their fingers impatiently on the wooden table and pushes their cocktail away.

“Why don’t we go on a walk?” Colson suggests, he just wants to get away - go somewhere. Colson pulls (Y/N) up, with his arm tightly around their waist - keeping them close against him. (Y/N) shadily pulls their hood up and slips on some black sunglasses - they have very slight hope to keep the clusters of paparazzi away from either themself or Cole.

“Colson? Colson Baker!” A paparazzi member sticks a microphone into their face violently and it collides with their upper lip - stars freckled through their blurry gaze. “Oh, fuck -!” (Y/N) startles and hurriedly holds a hand to their bleeding mouth. With stars in their eyes, they stumble backwards and collapse to the wooden floor - paparazzi swarms all around them.

Colson starts to retreat from within the bar but, when he notices that they’ve fallen, he instantly runs back to their side - seeing the tears falling down their glassy skin. “Oh god - you’re bleeding.” They can barely hear his soft murmur of a voice over the general deafening chatter of the bar - they look into his crystal blue eyes and he wipes the trickle of blood from underneath their nose. “Babe, you’re bleeding a lot.” Colson whispers softly, he grabs a wad of tissues from his pocket and gently dabs at their bloody lips - The tissues sops with blood and Colson grimaces. Paparazzi swarms closer and Colson shoves them all away, he shouts. “C’mon! They’re bleeding! Leave them the heck alone!” Colson burns with fury - he shuffles his feet and scoops you up in a bridal carry. Squeezing you to his tattooed, bare chest as he jogs out swiftly from the bar - proceeding to slam the door loudly right in the paparazzi's face.

“Shh... Baby girl, you’re alright.” Colson whispers, as they rest their head soundly in the crook of his neck - some dried blood smears on his bare skin. He kisses them and they wrap their arms tightly around his neck.

Rain begins falling heavily - and they shiver as Colson pulls them underneath the awning of the casino. (Y/N) tilts their face towards the gray sky, and feels cooling rain-droplets freckle their face. A shadow-y figure slowly approaches all of a sudden and cozies herself unnervingly close to Cole.

“Cols,” She purrs softly and kisses him on the lips, her slim hands with those perfectly manicured finger-nails suggestively trace the muscles on Colson’s bare chest. She attempts to kiss him again but Colson leans away nervously, his gaze flickering back and forth between her and them.

“M-Megan?” Colson questions in confusion and his hands immediately shoot up to push her away from him - She looks almost offended and her lips curl into a disgusted expression.

“Blonde angel, who the hell is that?” She coos smoothly, pushing back her perfectly styled jet black hair - she cups their face like a baby and playfully pinches at their cheeks, as if to mock them. (Y/N) automatically backs away, and rips her soft hand away from where it had been pinching their cheek. “Blonde angel, what the heck?” They challenge, their eyes flashing with anger as Megan begins to back off as she scoffs in a rude manner, swiftly fixing the creases in her leopard print mini-skirt.

(Y/N) tosses their head sassily, and their curls become slightly wild - their tongue pokes out slightly from between their lips. “I’m his girlfriend.” They say in an offended tone, they flip their hand into their air and swivel their hips - they light a blunt and begin nervously smoking it.

“Oh, sweetheart. I’m his wife.” She purrs, holding her slim hand up into the air to reveal it is decorated by one expensive ring and in the background, they can see a soft smile playing on Colson’s lips. He kisses Megan’s temple and traces her smirking lips as she cuddles into Colson’s embrace. “He’s my blonde angel baby.” She says sexily, messing her fingers through his soft, blonde curls. Colson nods in slight agreement, and flashes a tattoo on his forearm that says. ‘Megan Fox.’ He laughs evilly and continues kissing Megan’s puckered lips. “I’m genuinely surprised you didn’t see this coming, babe.” He says sadly, his blue eyes flashing with just a tiny hint of regret.

“You are a whore. Playing me like that.” (Y/N) hisses, they raise their hand and give Colson a firm smack across his awaiting cheek - He barely even flinches but leans forward to cup their face, they flinch away but Colson grabs them roughly by their pink choker. Megan watches on from the side, her face filled with lust and evil intent. She cheers him on. “C’mon, babe. Show that little slut who’s boss!” She encourages as Colson shakes them aggressively and they violently struggle to escape from him. Finally, he releases his threatening grip and drops (Y/N) right down to the wet concrete. They stare up at him and Megan, their eyes filling with tears that beg to escape as they choke out the last words which would ever be said to Colson Baker.

“I’m begging you, stop playing roulette with my heart.”

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shesagothgirl · 2 years

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you don’t need me - MGK

He knew something was bothering her. She had been distant, preoccupied with her thoughts, speaking only when spoken to. At first he thought it was the pressure of the album - he had been so consumed with getting ‘Mainstream Sellout’ to number one that he had been neglecting her, spending all his time in the studio or doing press, coming home only to take out his stress on her and go to sleep. She had handled it well, never faulting him for raising his voice or stumbling in intoxicated at all hours of the night. Every morning she got up and made him breakfast, despite whatever confrontation they had the night before. They would eat together at the dining room table, him speaking only of the album, her speaking only words of support, and with a kiss on her head he would be out the front door and she would be left to clean up the mess. It had become a routine, one that he knew he had burdened her with unfairly, but he couldn’t stop himself from needing that number one spot, and so he let months pass, with no real interaction with her, knowing that when it was all over, she would still be there, she always was. But this time it was different. He wasn’t sure when the change happened, but he could see it now, in the smile that never quite reached her eyes, in the tension that he felt each time he touched her, in the way she remained folded into herself as though she was less than.

“Number one album in the country.” He spoke softly, breaking the silence from his seat next to her in the long black limousine. His eyes hadn’t left her from the moment they settled in, his blue gaze boring into the side of her face, studying her every detail. She had barely spoken a word at the celebration dinner, her eyes cast down at her plate, moving the food around in an attempt to make people think she was actually eating. He had been aware of her all night, unable to decide on what was making her so uneasy. “I never thought we would actually get there.” He continued when she didn’t respond, watching as she stares out the open window beside her, taking a pull on the lit blunt between her perfectly manicured fingers.

Y/N knows he’s seeking her approval, and as exhausted as she is of talking about the album, she turns to him with a tired smile pulled at her lip gloss covered lips. “You deserve it.” She spoke sweetly, pulling her eyes from his the moment the words left her mouth, her gaze circling back to the city passing by her. Colson sat up straighter on the black leather seat beneath him, watching as her long straightened hair fell down her shoulder, creating a barrier between them. It was his favorite way that she styled her hair, simple, confident, as was the silk brown mid thigh dress she had clinging to her body, a dress he probably would have made a joke about ripping off her if she wasn’t so disturbed by him.

“Hey,” Colson whispers, his chest beginning to tighten at the anxiety her attitude was creating in him. Reaching forward he brushes her hair back with his long fingers, his hand caressing her shoulder before reaching the back of her neck, applying a small amount of pressure encouraging her to turn her head towards him. Releasing the smoke from another pull on the blunt Y/N turns, her eyes falling on Colson’s, his gaze a mixture of concern and fear. “What’s going on?” He questions softly, his calloused hand moving to the side of her makeup covered face, his thumb rubbing softly across her cheek bone. Y/N inhaled deeply, fighting the urge to lean into his touch. She was in love with Colson, so much that sometimes she had a hard time finding where she stopped and he began. He was everything to her, they had been through what felt like a lifetime together, she would do anything for him, be anything for him, and that was what scared her.

“I’m fine.” Y/N replied, forcing a smile onto her lips. The past few months with Colson had been the hardest of their three year relationship. She had been through album releases before, she knew the amount of stress and pressure he put on himself, she knew he always took it out on her, and she was okay with it, she remained strong, for him, for the light at the end of the tunnel, but this time was different. She felt unheard, unneeded, and unlike every other time, Colson couldn’t kiss it and make it better.

“That’s not what I asked.” Colson says, leaning forward to run his fingers through her hair, but before he does Y/N turns away, back to the window just as the limo pulls to a stop in front of the hotel they had been staying at for the last two days.

“Let’s not talk about it right now.” Y/N states, giving Colson no time to respond before she’s swinging the limo door open, dropping the blunt to the ground, and exiting into the cool night air. Y/N had so much she wanted to say, so much she wanted to tell him, but she was aware of the amount of alcohol he had consumed at dinner, she knew that it was nearing close to one in the morning, no good would come from a conversation tonight, so she would save it for the morning.

Colson stayed in his seat only for a moment before he eagerly exited behind her, using quick strides to reach where she had already entered the lobby and was waiting for the elevator to arrive. It killed him to see her like this, so distant, so hurt, he knew he was the cause of it, he just didn’t know how, and he was desperate to put a smile on her face again. The ride in the elevator to the fifth floor was silent, it wasn’t until they were in the large suite, the door locked, Y/N in the kitchen pouring herself a glass of water, that he spoke again. “Please tell me what’s going on.”

Y/N turns to Colson standing in the spacious kitchen in his bright pink suit, his choice of no undershirt giving her the view of his smooth tattooed chest, her favorite part about him. He looked perfect, so handsome, and it would be so easy for her to just fall into his arms and let him make her forget everything. But she couldn’t, so instead she took a sip of her water and avoided his brilliant blue eyes. “Colson, not tonight.”

“Don’t do that.” He says to her, his voice wavering just slightly as he takes a step closer to her. “Don’t act like this, whatever this is, isn’t bothering you, because it’s killing me.” Colson closes the distance between them, placing both his hands on her cheek to tilt her head back, making her look at him. Y/N’s eyes threaten to fill with tears as she breathes to steady herself, his intoxicating cologne clouding her judgment.

“You’ve been drinking.” Y/N says, looking him in the eyes, silently begging him to let this go for the night.

“And you‘ve been smoking.” Colson rebuttals, his gaze steady on the girl who holds his whole heart between her hands.

“That’s not the point.” Y/N sighs, pulling out of his grip and walking around him, desperate to exit the kitchen that now seemed too small. She heads down the hall towards the bedroom, eager to get out of the dress she once felt pretty in.

“Then what is the point, Y/N?” Colson asks, his voice rising as he follows close on her heels. This wasn’t her, she wasn’t like this, she always had a conversation, it’s something that had made their relationship so successful for all this time. It was like he could feel her slipping away, and he would be damned if he let that happen. Standing next to the bed he grips her wrist, pulling her to a stop in front of him. “We don’t do this, we don’t shut each other out.”

Y/N’s eyes begin to fill with tears. Colson is stubborn and an asshole, he can be selfish and unrelenting, but he loves her, and she knows he’s not going to give up until they talk. “You don’t see me.” She whispers, a single tear falling down her cheek making Colson realize the realness of her feelings. Colson steps closer to her, his fingers intertwining with hers as his eyebrows furrow together, his heart cracking at the pain on her face.

“Baby, what are you talking about?” He asks, his words soft and caressing. “I see you, I see you all the time. I see you right now.” A small sob leaves Y/N’s lips as she shakes her head, pulling her hand out of his. She needs to think, she needs to make him understand, and she can’t think when he’s touching her.

“No, Colson, you don’t see me.” She repeats more tears falling as she finally reveals what she’s been holding from him all this time. It’s quiet for a moment as the pair looks at each other, as if the other’s eyes will give some secret away. Colson wants nothing more than to be close to her, to hold her, to tell her he loves her, but he knows she doesn’t want that so he remains where he stands, waiting. “I’m proud of you.” She starts simply. “I’m so fucking proud of you. You deserve every bit of recognition you get from the hard work and dedication you put into this album.” She takes a deep breath, swallowing hard as Colson watches her every move. “You gave your all to this album and that is so so special, but along the way you lost sight of me, of us, and in the end the only thing you cared about was you.” Colson feels like he’s been punched in the gut. How could he not see how this was affecting her? He knew he had been more intense with this album, he knew he could have been treating her better, but he hadn’t realized how far he had gone.

“That’s not fair.” Colson starts, shaking his head making Y/N sigh in frustration, dropping onto the end of the bed beside her. He wasn’t hearing her. “I was focused on the album, yes, but I never stopped caring about you, I could never stop caring about you.” Y/N drops her head, unable to look at the panic in his eyes as he backtracks, trying to defend himself, his choices.

“If I wasn’t in your life, do you think the album would be as great as it is?” Y/N asks, the question coming from left field. Colson knew what she meant, and she was right. The songs on that album never would have been possible if he wasn’t with her. Some of them were about her, most had her influence, her ideas, all had her support. She was a huge part of the ‘’Mainstream Sellout’ album, almost as much as him.

Colson licks his lips, his eyes watching her and her defeated stance. “No.”

“No?”

“No.” He repeated, making Y/N tilt her head up to look him in the eye.

“Then why do you make me feel like I mean nothing to this relationship?” She asks, tears falling down her cheeks. “Like I mean nothing to your music? Like I mean nothing to you?” Colson feels the lump in his throat grow as the girl he’s in love with sobs in front of him. How could he have done this to her? “You don’t need me. And god does that kill me, because I need you, more than anything.”

Colson’s own eyes begin to fill with tears as he slowly takes a few steps towards the broken girl, kneeling down in front of her with a hesitancy as if she might push him away. “Look at me.” He whispers, his voice raspy as he tilts his head lower, trying to meet Y/N’s eye. Slowly she lifts her head, ashamed to have him see her this way. She was always strong in front of him, always. “You mean the fucking world to me.” He says, determined to not let the best thing that’s ever happened to him get away. “I need you, Y/N. I need you. You are the only thing that makes me happy in this shitty life.” The tears fall harder as he moves closer to her, positioning his body between her legs, his hands on either side of her body holding his weight against the bed. “I never meant to make you feel like this album meant more to me than you. Nothing will ever mean more than you.” He continues, reaching up with his right hand to wipe her tears away, her once perfect mascara running down her cheeks. “I’m sorry.”

Y/N nods, her eyes softening as Colson stands and pulls her into a hug, her head resting against his stomach as his fingers weave through her hair. The two remain unmoving for awhile, Y/N crying into his suit jacket, Colson replaying how close he was to losing the love of his life.

“I love you.” Colson whispers, making Y/N’s head turn to face him, his large hands pushing the loose strands of hair out of her face. Colson had said he loved her many times before, but this one felt different. He knew he would never allow her to feel this way again, especially if he was the cause of it. She knew that he finally saw her, that he understood her feelings.

“I love you.” Y/N whispered back just before Colson pressed his lips to hers, the butterflies she always felt invading her stomach. Their relationship wasn’t perfect, far from it, but they loved each other, and for them that was always enough.

#machine gun kelly #machine gun kelly imagine #imagine #mgk #mgk x y/n #mgk fluff #mainstream sellout #one shot #colson #colson baker

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aestheticimaginesandaus · 2 years

Note

hey idk if u still take requests but if you do, can you plz do dad!colson? im so obsessed! maybe one where he introduces casie to the baby?

I AM OBSESSED WITH DAD!COLSON SO HERE IT IS!!!

Not proof read. No warnings except maybe some cursing. Just soft dad Colson wanting all of his girls to get along. The baby is a girl but if you want me to change it go ahead. ALSO I normally write Y/N as female but if you want me to change that as well my inbox stays open. This one is a bit short but I wanted to keep like a little memory thing for Colson. As I was writing this, I imagined Colson like laying in bed cause he couldn’t sleep thinking about this moment. Kind of like a comfort thing for him, when all of his girls were getting along and they really became a family. When Casie finally saw Y/N as someone more than just her dad’s girlfriend but as a friend to her.

Colson had been weary of introducing Casie to his new daughter. He wasn’t so much worried she’d be jealous or anything…maybe it was the fact that Casie had been his only daughter for so long, maybe Casie would think that this new baby would be her replacement? ‘Get it together Colson. For Casie.’ He says to himself.

“CASIE COME HERE.” He shouts. Casie runs down the stairs of the house within minutes. “What’s up?” She asks. “I want you to meet the new baby. Y/N is out of the hospital now, and I think it would be good for the both of you. You and the baby, to get to know each other.” He rambles.

Y/N comes home with the baby a few minutes later. “She is so small, and squishy.” Casie states. Colson chuckles and Y/N let’s out that laugh that Colson adores. “Do you want to hold her?” Y/N asks. “Oh, I don’t know..” Casie says reluctantly. “Go and sit down on the couch or something, get very comfortable.” Y/N directs Casie to the couch and lets her get settled. “Hold her like this, support her head. That’s it.” Y/N shows Casie how to hold her, Casie gently takes the baby from her arms and situates her. Casie smiles, her smiles stretches up to her ears and she looks into the baby’s eyes. “She beautiful.” She says in awe. Colson watches as his Casie carefully handles the baby. “What did you name her?” Casie asks. Y/N looks away and Colson chuckles as he rubs the back of his neck. “We haven’t decided yet.” Y/N interjects “We’ve just been calling her baby girl until we come up with something.” She laughs.

Casie chuckles. “Sounds like my dad.” Y/N laughs in agreement. Y/N sits next to Casie and they sit in silence. The baby starts dozing off and Y/N smiles. “I think she likes you.” Casie looks at Y/N and smiles. “I’m gonna hit the bathroom for a minute.” Colson says, interrupting the moment and Y/N shoots him off.

Casie looks at the baby and sighs. “What’s on your mind?” Y/N asks. “I don’t know, it’s stupid.” Casie says.

“Talk to me. That’s what I’m here for.” Y/N reassures.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy you guys are starting a family of your own, but what if…” Casie trails.

“Colson loves you, Cass. I know what you’re thinking. But you’re his first daughter and his number one. He’d never replace you, he could never replace you. He loves you so much.” Y/N says. Casie looks at Y/N with tears in her eyes. Y/N hugs her from the side and kisses the top of her head. Casie smiles. “Thank you. I needed to hear that.”

Colson listens on the other side of the wall. Tears in his eyes as he watches his favorite girls interact with each other. They don’t know he witnessed the whole thing and he wants to keep it that way.

#colson x reader #mgk x reader #machine gun kelly #imagine #i dont know how to tag help #mgk x y/n #machine gun kelly x reader #colson baker #colson imagine

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findingmyself08 · 8 months

Text

.Roulette With My Heart.

Pairings: Colson Baker x Reader.

Warnings / Content: Alcohol, Mild Blood, Mild Violence, Gambling, Cheating, Suggestive Terms.

“Let me buy you a drink,” Colson offers, taking their pale hand into his own as he leads them back into the bustling bar.

“You never know with me, baby.” Colson says he's still smirking in a way that causes (Y/N) stomach to churn inside. He squeezes their hand back and leans forward to press kisses on their temple.

A bartender walks over and places a cocktail glass onto the table - (Y/N) reaches for it and takes a long sip of the fruity concoction before glancing back up at Colson.

“M-Megan?” Colson questions in confusion and his hands immediately shoot up to push her away from him - She looks almost offended and her lips curl into a disgusted expression.

“I’m begging you, stop playing roulette with my heart.”

#fanfic #fanfiction #alcohol #cheating #richard colson baker #colson baker #mgk fanfic #mgk #machine gun kelly #y/n #colson baker x reader #y/n x colson baker #roulette #mgk lyrics #songs #Spotify

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emotionalsupportemoboys · 2 years

Text

Touya-realizing-he’s-in-love-with-you vibes ❤️‍🔥

I fill my lungs 'cause my heart's made of concrete

I looked to God, even he doesn't want me

I grind my teeth in my sleep 'cause of bad dreams

Try to live my life, but this ecstasy's inside me

(Damn) I can't wake up happy

I just took a knife to the strings that attach me

Every day's passing

Everyone's laughing

JFK

They might find my brains in the backseat

I'm trying my best not to

Open up my heart, it's been

Torn apart too many times

But without you, I'd die

And I don't wanna die

Not today, not tomorrow, not tonight

I don't wanna die

I need you, I need you more than life

More than life, more than life, more than life

She's a pretty little liar

Over-analyzer

I fell in love with you

And I don't mind it

But I know, baby

This won't go how we expected

But when I told you that I fuckin' love you, shit, I meant it

She's doing coke in the bathroom

When did I ask you?

Stuck in a bad mood

Slipped and I passed you

Fuck, I'm a bad dude

Guess you're attached to me

Yeah, I guess you're attached to me

I'm trying my best not to

Open up my heart, it's been

Torn apart too many times

But without you, I'd die

And I don't wanna die

Not today, not tomorrow, not tonight

I don't wanna die

I need you, I need you more than life

More than life, more than life, more than life

(More than life, more than life, more than life)

(Life) I need you, I need you more than life

I need you, I need you, yeah

What's the point of living? I heard death is easier

I found the love, but I'm scared I won't keep her

What's the point of living? I heard death is easier

I look over my shoulder and I see the reaper (Reaper)

(Yeah, yeah, yeah)

I'm trying my best not to

Open up my heart, it's been

Torn apart too many times

But without you, I'd die

And I don't wanna die

Not today, not tomorrow, not tonight

I don't wanna die

I need you, I need you more than life

More than life, more than life, more than life

I need you, I need you more than life, yeah

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rafetopia · 5 months

Text

𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞

- 𝐫𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐧

pairing: rafe cameron x fem!exgf!reader, topper thornton x fem!gf!reader (only mentioned)

genre: smut & minor angst -> 18+only

warnings: smutty stuff, mentions of past toxic relationship, some soft!rafe, some mean!rafe, name calling, mentions of drugs, choking (in a non sexual way), ass slapping, cheating, unprotected sex, lmk if k forgot something

words: ~3.3k

request: okay!! i wanted to request a rafe x reader based off the song ‘why are you here’ by machine gun kelly. write it however you want🖤 (by anonymous)

summary: after seeing your ex rafe in the club, you have to learn once again why the two of you never could’ve worked out, no matter how much you both wished you could

note: this is a repost from my old blog, which is why you might have seen it before. also i don’t remember if it’s proofread

also big thank you to my baby @chaos-mybeloved for beta reading this one for me

also i’m sorry for the format idk how to format my stuff

I hate that I saw you again last night

You were with somebody and so was I

Met you in the bathroom at 12:05

And I fucked you again

We can never be friends, yeah, yeah, yeah

“Baby, I’m gonna get another drink, you want one?” Topper screamed into your ear, trying to drown out the noise.

You shook your head with a smile and focused back on the music. They were playing your favorite song, there was no way you’d stop dancing just for another drink. The dance floor was full and still, most eyes were fixated on you, as you moved your body perfectly to the rhythm of the song. You were no professional dancer but you sure as hell knew what you were doing.

Concentrated on the music, you didn’t notice the new pair of eyes watching you from the corner of the dance floor. The young man was talking to the girl next to him but his gaze never moved from your body. The blonde must’ve noticed as her voice grew angry but the man didn’t seem to care. He wasn’t even listening to the words thrown at him, his attention only belonging to you.

The song was coming to an end and you opened your eyes back up, slowly adjusting to your surroundings. You did that sometimes while dancing, closing your eyes so you could focus more on the music and enjoy the moment instead of getting distracted by the people around you. You looked around, trying to see if you could find your boyfriend when your eyes met his. A sudden feeling of sadness and anger rushed through your body, keeping you from focusing. Your mind was all over the place, tons of thoughts blocking your mind all at once.

Unsure of how you got there, you found yourself in one of the club bathrooms, hanging above the sink. You tried to keep the tears inside your eyes and normally you were good at that but when it came to him, everything was different. You placed your hands on the sides of the sink, trying to keep your body from falling down when the door to the bathroom opened. You didn’t need to look up in order to know who it was.

“I’m pretty sure the tits on the door stand for “women”.” You spat out.

“(Y/N)…”

“What do you want, Cameron?” You hissed, now turning around to look directly into his light gray eyes.

His gaze went down to the ground, clearly trying to avoid your anger. “I don’t know… You looked sad and I… I wanted to see if you were okay.”

“I’m fine.” You hissed, turning away from him. You looked into the mirror but the girl you met looked far from fine. Sure her makeup and hair looked perfect, but her eyes told a different story. They were watery, seconds from bursting out into tears. She tried to keep herself together but the presence of the boy behind her made everything harder.

You took a deep breath and looked at the boy in the mirror. His hair was a mess, sure it looked good, it always did but not because he put any effort into it. His lips were smiling but his eyes never were good at lying. You had always loved his eyes, the way they sparkled in the morning sun or the way they lit up when you told him one of your unfunny dad jokes that always made him laugh. He always sounded so beautiful when he was laughing, a sound you haven't heard in a very long time but missed terribly. He was in pain, clearly and it hurt you but it wasn’t that that was your fault. At least not completely.

“Listen…” He started, not sure if he should continue or just turn around and leave. “I… I’m sorry that you’re sad. Don’t like seeing you like this.”

“Don’t like seeing me like this?” You laughed. “That’s funny.” You turned around, now facing him directly. “Now be honest Cam-”

“Stop calling me that.”

“But that’s your fucking name now isn’t it?” You paused, walking one step closer to him. “Now be honest, why are you here, Cameron?”

“Like I already said (Y/L/N), because I wanted to see if you were okay.” He pressed, his face now only inches away from yours.

“Hmm. You see, I was okay I was having the time of my life until you and your blonde accessory of the week waltzed in.”

“Ohhh, my accessory of the week hm? Says the one who’s fucking my best friend.” His eyes were dark and his voice turned low. It was obvious how angry he was, something that had never stopped you from topping it off once more.

“That’s right Rafe Cameron, I’m fucking your best friend.” You paused, knowing if you’d go down that road, there would be no going back. “And guess what, he’s better at-” You wanted to continue but got cut off by Rafe's hand around your throat.

“Better at what sweetheart hm?” He whispered. “Tell me, darling.”

“There it is.” You grinned wickedly. “There’s the Rafe Cameron I know and hate.”

That hit him. It was obvious, his grip tightened around your throat and his eyes flickered. He knew you were mad at him but knowing you actually hated him, hit him harder than he thought it would. He wanted to say something, he wanted to spit out a response so dark even the devil would flinch but he couldn’t.

Your body tensed at the loss of oxygen flowing through your throat and you felt your heart fasten but you didn’t flinch. You met his dark gaze and countered with an even darker one. It was like when you were still together, you would challenge and provoke each other until one of you snapped. It had always been like this and it never changed even after you broke up.

He opened his mouth, about to say something when he stopped and let go of your throat. You gasped for air, your hand automatically wandering to your throat. He had done this shit before but never as strong and tight as he did now. His gaze wandered down to the hand on your throat and something in his eyes changed as if he was sorry. He held his hands up and took a few steps back until his back met the wall behind him.

“You know I… I…” He tried but clearly struggled with finding the right words. “I… I’m…” He looked at you, hoping for you to say something but you stayed silent. “You know what, forget it.” He pulled out before ripping the bathroom door open and making his way outside.

Split seconds later and his lips crashed onto yours. You didn’t quite remember how this happened, how your arm reached after him, how you pulled him towards you, or how he smashed the door back shut behind him, all you knew was how much you needed him, how much you missed him.

His hands wandered around your waist as he pulled you closer to him. You had only been making out for a few seconds but you could feel his hardened erection on your body, which turned you on even more. Your hands wandered through his hair, something that you had always loved to do when you were making out.

“Let me show you who the better lover is, sweetheart.” He whispered into your ear. “Bet Topper can’t make you scream the way I’m about to do.” His mouth wandered down your neck, gently kissing and sucking on your soft skin while his hand pushed down your left strap. Your dress was tight but it wasn’t enough to make it fall down your body but it was enough to make your left tit fall out.

He smirked at the sight of your exposed nipple before leaning down and gently sucking on it. He got more passionate with each second, causing you to grow impatient. You placed your finger under his chin and pulled his face back up to yours.

“I need you, to fuck me, Rafe Cameron. Now.” You whispered.

“Mhhh so needy for someone who hates me so bad.” He hummed with a grin on his face. “What would your boyfriend say if he saw his girl like this, all wet for me already, hm? Bet he can’t make you wet like this that fast.”

You rolled your eyes and hopped on the sink behind you, spreading your legs wide apart leaving him no choice but to look down at your exposed thong that was barely enough fabric to cover your folds. You gently let your hand wander through his hair before pulling him towards you. “I. Said. Fuck. Me. Rafe Cameron.” You smirked and continued: “Before I go out there and tell everyone that Topper's dick is bigger than yours.”

His eyes widened in surprise. “Is it?”

“Oh god.” You groaned before pushing his head down to your crotch.

He chuckled before placing his teeth on your thong, ripping it from your body with one quick pull. You moaned at the sight of it and let your head fall back onto the mirror. He got down on his knees and started tongue fucking your pussy like there was no tomorrow. He had always had his special ways, techniques only Rafe Cameron knew how to use but this boy never failed to surprise you. You tried to keep quiet, afraid someone would hear you but he made it very hard when he added his thumb to the party. Soon, he started rubbing soft circles around your clit, something that had always been your weakness.

“Rafe…” You moaned out. “I’m close.”

He didn’t answer but you could feel him smirk against your soaking wet pussy. He sped up his pace, even adding another finger knowing how much you’d always loved it. You tried to hold on to the sink you were sitting on, nearly breaking off a nail as you press your fingertips against the cold ceramic. He could feel your walls tighten around his finger and shortly after, you were cumming all over him. He removed his finger and sucked off your juice, something he’d always loved to do.

You were still holding on to the sink, trying to prepare for what was about to come next. From experience you knew, there was no way in hell he’d let you go without having fucked you at least once, and regarding the boner that was pressing against your stomach, he wouldn't make an exception now.

He smashed his lips onto yours, not leaving any room for you to breathe. Your hands wandered down and unbuckled his belt, quickly exposing his hardened erection. You were about to push him inside you when pulled away.

“Uh, Uh, turn around for me baby, let me see that pretty ass of yours while I fuck you.”

He didn’t need to tell you twice, you quickly hopped off the counter and turned around making him able to slide right into you, causing you both to moan out at the sudden contact.

“Fuck (Y/N) you’re still so tight.”

“What, did you think Topper’s dick is so big it would’ve stretched me out?”

You could see his eye roll through the mirror, causing you to chuckle silently. “Glad to see you still have that pretty big mouth. Let’s see what we can do about that, huh?” He whispered into your ear as he leaned forward, his eyes never leaving yours. He reached into his pocket and pulled the ripped piece of fabric before shoving it into your mouth. “Now, we don’t want anyone to find out what a dirty little slut you are now do we?” You nodded quickly, hoping it would get him to finally start fucking you.

Your hopes were heard and soon you were met with his hips thrusting into your ass, making clap sounds every time your skin touched. His hands held onto your hips as his thrusts got faster and faster with every move. He pulled your hips closer to him, changing the ankle which made him reach the spot that made you lose all your senses. You wanted to scream out his name but instead, felt tears forming in your eyes caused by your inability to do so.

This of cource didn’t go unnoticed by him, causing him to grin and only sped up his pace, fucking you even harder than before. His eyes wandered from your face down to your ass where he watched it wiggle because of his movements. He loved the sight in front of him, you being all messed up because of him, salty tears rolling down your face, colored black mixed with your eyeliner, and your ass presented in front of him, begging him to get slapped. In fact, it was his favorite sight. He tried not to think about it too much but he tried to burn that image deep inside his mind, scared he wouldn’t be able to see it again that fast, if ever.

He wished he could’ve gone like this forever but there was still the risk of getting caught and even though he didn’t care, he knew you would, and believe it or not but upsetting you was the last thing he wanted. So he softly let his hands slide over your body, down to your clit where he placed his finger for support. You let your head fall back onto his shoulder, as he still leaned over you. He loved the way your skin felt on his, a feeling he had never felt with anyone else. He loved the way your hair smelled when you let yourself fall back, even though he hated having hair on his face.

You weren’t able to moan his name out loud but by the way, your nails dug into his thigh, he knew you were close and so was he. He sped up once again, causing you to reach your high almost synchronized with him. You could feel his cum shooting through your body as you tried to recover from your own orgasm.

Even though you were able to free yourself from your own panties by now, you still had trouble catching your breath which didn’t go unnoticed by the boy, still inside of you.

“Hey, are you okay?” He asked softly.

You nodded and gave him a happy smile through the mirror, causing him to smile himself. Oh, much he missed that smile. How much he missed you in general. But he knew you didn’t work out, you tried several times and it always ended in tears.

He slowly pulled out and quickly grabbed the piece of paper that you were handing him before you got yourself your own. The both of you cleaned yourself up and got back dressed. He wanted to say something, how much he enjoyed being close to you like this again but the words didn’t come out.

You watched him silently as he struggled to close his belt because it was stuck once again. You silently laughed at the sight in front of you, the boy that just fucked you mercilessly against the sink in the bathroom of your favorite club struggling with a task as simple as closing his belt. It reminded you of a side of Rafe, that he barely showed anyone these days. The side where he allowed himself to struggle, where he allowed himself to be human and not that perfect business robot, Ward Cameron tried to force him to be.

I'm a demon in the night

She's an angel with the white

Told me keep on all the lights

I'ma show you what you like

Help you put back on your clothes

Make sure nothing's on your nose

Ain't even tell my closest homies, nobody knows

“Here let me help you.” You said as you stepped forward and took the matter into your own hands. “I thought you’d thrown this thing out by now, it has been causing problems since the day I bought it for you.”

“It’s still working.” He answered, but there was a shift in his voice. He sounded harsher than before as if someone got into his mind and reminded him how he was supposed to act.

“Whatever you say then.” You mourned as you slid the belt into the buckle.

You got back up, ready to leave when he pulled you back. “You shouldn’t go out like that, here let me fix you.” He grabbed a piece of paper and poured some water on it, before softly removing black makeup stains from your face. He was very careful, not wanting to hurt you. “I think that’s it but maybe you should… like redo that or something… I don’t know. You always used to do that.”

“Right.” You grabbed into your bag and pulled out a thin, black eyeliner. “Do you want to do it? You used to like doing it.”

“Sure.” He chuckled. He wasn’t particularly good at drawing your eyeliner but you didn’t care. It always felt special when Rafe did your makeup, no matter if it looked perfect or not. You never let anyone do your makeup but there was something about the expression he made once he finished that you just couldn’t resist.

“You know… we could try to stay friends, at least.” You proposed carefully. “If you want to.”

“I don’t want to be your friend, (Y/N). When will you get that into your thick skull that this will never happen?” He spat out as he handed you back your eyeliner. “Like we could never be friends. Like… like what would we even do… as… as friends? Like, what would that friendship be good for?”

“Geez, as you wish Cameron, but know that this… whatever this was… will never happen again.” You paused, trying to fight back your incoming tears. “Like ever.”

“Fine by me.” He mumbled under his breath, but still loud enough for you to hear.

“Good, it’s settled then. I go back to Topper and you can go back to snorting coke off some whores ass.” You spat as you grabbed your bag and stormed out of the door.

He saw you walking through the crowd and stumbling back into the arms of your boyfriend.

Rafe knew he fucked up, but it was for the better. He knew how the both of you could get when you didn’t share the same opinion on something. He knew what power his words held over you if he lost control and said things he never wanted to say. He had seen you before, broken down on his kitchen floor between shattered bottles of glass after the both of you lost it. It was painful, seeing you walk back to Topper, the boy he used to call his best friend. He knew he’d go back to snorting coke, he could already feel the lack of substances in his blood and deep down, he knew Topper was the better man. He knew he wouldn’t hurt you the way he did, he never could and he was right. Topper could never hurt you the way Rafe did but that wasn’t because he was the better man, it was because Rafe had something that Topper never would. You loved him.

I hate that I saw you again last night

You were with somebody and so was I

Met you in the bathroom at 12:05

And I fucked you again

We can never be friends

#jas writes ❥#rafe cameron #outer banks #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron angst #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron x female reader #outer banks fanfiction

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prettytoxicrevolver · 2 years

Text

Hold Me | Colson Baker

Requested? Yes! Hope you like it! @sadlittleghoulette

Warnings? Rough mental day

Summary: You have a rough mental day and just need Colson by your side

Word Count: 558 (sorry it's short! I can always write more)

You knew today was gonna be rough from the moment you woke up in the morning. It wasn’t an exact science, but your mood or feeling when you woke up always indicated how the rest of the day would go for you.

Today was definitely not a good day.

You woke up feeling like you hadn’t slept at all and several nightmares plagued your mind throughout the night. You persevered though, getting ready for work and heading out with the sinking feeling you wouldn’t have a great day.

Work was horrible, to say the least. You were short staffed, had late breaks, and rude people all day long. It was a headache from start to finish. By the time you got home, you felt mentally drained.

Getting no sleep, dealing with horrible people, and your tendency to overthink and breakdown in a quick fashion combined to ruin your already rough day.

The minute your butt meets the couch tears are slipping down your face without any rhyme or reason. You hated when this happened. It made you feel silly and weak and like whatever you were crying over was never worth it.

“Baby?” Colson asks quietly.

You look up through teary eyes, the sight of your boyfriend causing your heart to squeeze harder in your chest. Fresh tears fall down your cheeks as Colson steps towards you and kneels down, hands resting on your thighs.

“What’s wrong honey?” he asks and you shake your head.

“What do you need?”

“I just need you to hold me,” you choke out through thick tears and Colson reacts in seconds.

He slips his arms around your waist, pulling his body flush against yours and you tuck your head into his shoulder. He lifts a hand to run softly through your hair and your legs wrap around his waist trying to bring him as close as physically possible.

He holds you tight, humming in your ear and breathing slow and deep so you can match his pattern. After a few minutes, he pulls back, lifting his hands so he can brush away the tears that are remaining. He presses a kiss to your forehead, rotating soothing patterns on your cheeks.

“Do you wanna tell me what happened?” he tries again.

“I hate my brain,” you declare and Colson can’t help the small smirk on his lips.

“I don’t really like mine either. Anything else?”

“I just never feel good enough or like i’m doing anything right and I don’t deserve any of the good things that happen to me and-“

“Hey,” Colson calls, bringing you back from your spiral.

Your eyes finally look to his and you feel yourself take another deep breath instinctively. He takes another one with you and offers a soft smile.

“Sweetheart, It’s okay to have bad brain days. But please always tell me so I can help. I’ll always be here to bring you back.”

Your head drops back onto Colson’s shoulder, leaning to press a kiss to his neck and Colson’s drops his head onto yours.

You sit like that for another minute before Col stands, bringing you with him and moving your entangled bodies to the couch again. He pulls your tight against him, laying on top of him, his arms wrapped around your waist while yours wrap around his shoulders.

“I love you, baby.”

#colson baker x reader #colson baker fanfic #colson baker fluff #colson baker imagine #colson baker drabble #machine gun kelly x y/n #machine gun kelly x reader #machine gun kelly imagine #machine gun kelly fanfic

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whowantslovergirl · 3 months

Text

Why are you here?

Nate Jacobs x reader (reader is female with she/her pronouns)

warnings: a lil bit of smut, suggestive lyrics ig, there is so much song fics i deeply apologize, cursing, this is before Maddy but they’re in junior year already, so like beginning of junior year, Y/N HAVING THE MOST SELF RESPECT, Nate Jacobs, mgk song 🤠,italics are flashbacks,^ this means start the song 💋 hope you enjoy my lovers 🤍

euphoria masterlist

Summary: Nate and Y/N are so bad for each other

posted: February 12,2024

Nate and Y/N broke up two months ago and Nate still thinks they’re together. She can never move on. He definitely cannot move on. They are terrible for each other and they know that but they still find each other. ^

I hate that I saw you again last night

You were with somebody and so was I

Met you in the bathroom at 12:05

And I fucked you again

We can never be friends, yeah, yeah, yeah

You were at some random party. Maddy forced you to come. You were having fun until you saw him, your ex, on some other girl grinding on her. You can’t be mad. You had a date but still why is he with another girl.

_____

It was 12:05 you guys were both in the bathroom.

Fucking.

You can’t believe you did this.

“I can’t believe I did this! Get out of me Nate!” He finished and you were freaking out. You put your hands on your face freaking out. The main reason you were mad is because this is not the first time this happened.

“Calm down Y/N it’s not that serious.”

“To you! I promised myself that this bathroom thing will not happen again!” You rushed out of the bathroom leaving him.

I'm not myself

I'm not myself when you're around, no

Can't be helped

We are insane, that's just the way it goes

Nate and Y/N are back together for the tenth? time and it’s good for now.

Until you saw him with Maddy.

_____

“Maddy, Nate? Are you serious?”

“It’s not that serious Y/N.”

“You always say that! But if it was my ex you would be throwing a bitch fit!”

and he did.

**Flashback**

“Why the fuck were you talking to him!” Nate was screaming because you talking to your ex.

He accidentally bumped into you and said sorry and you said it’s fine.

That was the whole conversation.

“I’m sorry is two words talking now?! All I said was it’s fine!”

“Bullshit!”

You rolled your eyes. “Unbelievable Un fucking believable!”

**End of Flashback**

I'm a demon in the night

She's an angel with the white

Told me keep on all the lights

I'ma show you what you like

Two months later. Everyone is at a party.

And Nate is trying to get back together again.

“Come on you know we’re perfect for each other!”

“No we’re really not Nate. Please leave me alone. I have pepper spray and a pocket knife in my bag.” Then you walked away trying to leave.

Help you put back on your clothes

Make sure nothing's on your nose

Ain't even tell my closest homies, nobody knows

“We’re really not right?” Nate said smirking. The bathroom shit happened again.

“Shut the fuck up Nate.” You said rolling your eyes. He can see you struggling with your dress and helps you.

“Oh I bet you’re gonna brag about this huh? ‘Oh yea I fucked her again!’ right?”

“I actually never told anyone about this.” You just roll your eyes and left. That is such bullshit.

I hate that I saw you again last night

You were with somebody and so was I

Met you in the bathroom at 12:05

And I fucked you again

“Fuck!” You said finishing. He groaned and slipped out of you. “We really need to stop this nonsense Nate.”

“Why Y/n? Nothing is going wrong.”

“To you Nate! I promised myself I wouldn’t do this shit with you again!” He tried to speak but you just left. He smirked and left slightly after.

We can never be friends, yeah, yeah, yeah

“We can never be friends. We are way past that point.” You said while in Nate’s room. He asked if you guys can talk and you said yes.

“Yea friends don’t do what we do.” He said laughing.

“This isn’t funny Nate! We’re done. I’m done.” You said trying to walk out but he grabbed your arm. “If you’re done why was I inside you last night?”

“Ugh you’re an asshole!”

“I know. So I’ll see you in the bathroom Y/n.” You didn’t say anything and left like always.

I couldn't cry

I need to smoke, I'm feeling sick inside

From seeing you next to a friend of mine

We didn't speak but I read your mind

Both telling lies, our alibis didn't work this time

It’s been six months since you guys last fucked in the bathroom. And you’ve been taking care of yourself not worrying about Nate. You’re with McKay just talking, not anything special just catching up as two friends.

Nate saw this and just walked out, mad that you’re not talking to him or laughing with him. He’s so fucking angry.

I'm a demon in the night

She's an angel with the white

Told her keep on all the lights

You can show me what you like

“Hey angel.” You jumped because you didn’t know he was in there, in your room. “Nate get out.”

“You know you don’t want me to do that. I just wanna see you.”

“Well I don’t want to see you so get out.” He starts getting closer and the back of your knees hit the bed causing you to fall on the bed. He slowly comes on top of you and starts kissing, biting, and licking your neck.

“Nate stop.” You said pushing him away.

“You don’t really want me to stop do you?” You just stay silent and he takes off your shirt then his own.

“Ima show you what you like baby.”

Help me put back on my clothes

Make sure nothing's on my nose

Can't even tell my closest homies, nobody knows

Nate and Y/n are now dating (again) but secretly this time. You didn’t want the backlash from your friends and Nate was going with it because you told him too. He couldn’t give less of a fuck.

You guys are about to go to a party but got occupied with each other. Before you were about to go. “Wait Nate, you have stuff on your nose.” You said as you wipe the ‘stuff’ off his nose.

“Thanks baby.”

I hate that I saw you again last night

You were with somebody and so was I

Met you in the bathroom at 12:05

And I fucked you again

Nate and Y/n broke up again. They were at a party, saw the other with someone else, 12:05 hit the clock and they were back in the bathroom.

“We really need to stop Nate!”

We can never be friends, yeah, yeah, yeah

We can never be friends

We can never be friends, yeah, yeah, yeah

You were calling Nate seeing if he’s busy and he picked up immediately.

“Hey angel.” You roll your eyes. “Hi Nate.”

“Why are you calling me?” You can hear the tiredness in his voice but you ignore it.

“I was saying that it’s over like forever. And I’m probably gonna go back but I just want some type of closure.”

“Ok…” He sat up in his bed and was about to say something but you beat him too it. “So bye Nate.”

Yeah, I know that I said I was at home

Okay, yeah, you caught me

I thought that you said you were all alone

Look at you lying

You’re at another party and you saw Nate. He said he was home. You walk up to him and tap him on the shoulder and he turned around looking like he seen a ghost. “I thought you were home Nate. I want to talk to you.”

“Don’t pin this on me Y/n. You said you were all alone. Look at you lying.”

“Shut the fuck up. Now come on I want to fuck you one last time before I actually end this.” His mouth opened a little bit but he smirked.

“Lead the way angel.”

I hate that I saw you again last night

You were with somebody and so was I

Met you in the bathroom at 12:05

And I fucked you again

After you guys were done. You sat on the sink and he sat across from you on the bathtub.

“Were you serious about you ending things for good?” He said breaking the silence. You just nodded and his head went in his hands.

“I really hate the way you make me feel Nate. We gotta end this for good. The only reason it didn’t happen sooner was because you didn’t want to end. You gotta let go Nate.”

We can never be friends, yeah, yeah, yeah

We can never be friends

After you told Nate that it was over, he went completely MIA, missing classes, not going to practice. He can’t even fathom that this is happening. He thought you guys were forever.

That Y/n and Nate were forever.

We can never be friends, yeah, yeah, yeah

An: HSIEJDIDJ ok but if you didn’t get the time placement THIS IS BEGINNING JUNIOR YEAR meaning that it just started so basically Y/n was Nate’s villain origin story 😔 BUT HOPED YOU ENJOYED MY LOVERS 🤍🤍

#Spotify #my lovers on top #euphoria #euphoria x reader #nate jacobs #nate jacobs x reader #angst #mgk lyrics

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i-think-i-did-it-again · 7 months

Text

The Tour XII

Warning: swearing, drinking, smut, angst

You’re not sure if it’s out of annoyance or he genuinely wants to but as soon as Colson strides back into the green room, he suggests we all go out and get shit faced. Everyone jumps at the idea and begins discussing places to go, who to invite, what time to go. You listen to the hum of conversation around you, enjoying the fact that no one knows Colson was on his knees half an hour ago. The thought makes your pussy pulse and you cross your legs tightly. Ashleigh and Sophie begin planning outfits and deciding what to do for their makeup and hair. Sophie insists on glamming you up for the occasion as there will definitely be paparazzi and people in the club taking photos. You reluctantly agree and the three of you head back to the hotel to get ready.

“So how did you end up in my clothes after the concert tonight?” Sophie asks as she finishes curling your hair. You look at her face in the reflection of the mirror and instantly blush.

“I spilt something on my clothes,” you mutter, looking away from her to sip your homemade cocktail.

“I call bullshit,” Ashleigh calls from the bedroom behind you. As much as you hate their prying, you love that they both know you well enough to tell when you’re lying.

“Ok but swear to me that you won’t say anything, ok?” you beg with pleading eyes.

Ashleigh is suddenly in the bathroom beside Sophie when you turn on your chair to speak. You don’t really know where to start but you figure you should probably start from the beginning, considering neither of them know the full extent of what the fuck has been going on with Colson and you. You take a deep, steadying breath, square your shoulders and look up at your two best friends.

“Colson and I have been hooking up secretly since the start of the tour,” you don’t wait for them to react before quickly continuing. “When I asked that we put some rules in place, he was a dick, we stopped and I thought that was the end of it. Then he went and made it all confusing by being an asshole to Chase, storming into my hotel room when clearly we went in there to be alone. What made it even more confusing was the fact that he went and apologised for all his shitty behaviour.”

“Classic Kells, act first and think second,” Ashleigh shakes her head with a sigh. You couldn’t possibly agree with her more.

“Yeah well, I made it worse by accepting his apology because he seemed to believe that meant we could go back to hooking up but I shut him down.”

“And how did he take that?” Sophie gives you an all knowing smile and you sink back into your seat with shame.

“You saw how he took it. I ended up making out with him on the bus, remember?” they nod, remembering exactly what you’re talking about because they both walked in on said make out with Rook. “I just didn’t want to get sucked in anymore so I thought that if I forced him to leave me alone, things would go back to normal eventually but instead, I just made things worse.”

“Hey, you can’t blame yourself for this whole thing. Kells is just as much involved as you are except he knows how to put on an act. The fact that he’s choosing not to is more a reflection on him than it is on you,” Ashleigh reassures you but somehow you can’t seem to see things the way she does. Your sole purpose for being here is to keep him in check and you’re failing miserably, according to Francis and Kathy anyway.

You stand up and push your way past them to the clothes Sophie has laid out on the bed for you. It’s not your usual style but you know you have to trust the process when it comes to her choices. Most of the time what she picks out works in your favour but you have to push through the initial shock to see it. This time is no exception.

Laid on the bed is a tight fitting black long sleeve top with a turtleneck, a faux leather skirt with a silver zipper running up the front and black satin thigh high boots. If anyone else suggested this outfit to you, you’d laugh in their face but for some reason when Sophie does, you go with it without question. Still, you grimace internally at the short length of the skirt.

“You still didn’t answer my question though,” Sophie sits you on the bed to start on fixing your makeup now that your hair is done.

“I forgot what the question was,” you lie and you know you don’t fool either of them. Sophie raises one perfectly plucked eyebrow at you and you buckle. “I got wet when I stepped into Colson’s shower and he…ate me out.” you blush a bright red and focus on looking anywhere but at the two of them.

“You are a fucking queen,” Sophie praises you and Ashleigh cheers.

“To a fucking queen!” Ash toasts, raising her solo cup in the air and throwing the entire contents back in one gulp.

They drop the topic after that. You’re not sure if it’s because they sense your discomfort or because they want to maintain your privacy or both but you’re grateful. As much as you love your best friends, you’ve never really been the kiss and tell kind of person, especially when you’re not even really sure what to classify Colson and you at the moment. It feels wrong to be sharing every gory detail, even if they are his friends too.

When your makeup is done, you’ve almost finished an entire bottle of wine and you’ve put the intimidating outfit on, it’s time to meet the guys in the lobby. Ashleigh snaps a few pics of the three of you in the elevator for Instagram and you’re actually really starting to like how the outfit looks on you. When you step into the lobby and all the guys catcall you, you like the outfit even more.

You look around and notice that Colson is missing but Rook assures the group that he’s on his way down. When the elevator dings and Colson steps out, your heart stutters in your chest. Even though you’re trying so hard to be indifferent to him, you can’t help but be flawed every time you see him. His bleach blonde hair, his angular jaw and sharp cheekbones, the way his eyes flicker different shades depending on the lighting of the room, his pink lips always set in a slight pout, the way his nose ring catches in the light. The thing that stands out to you the most though, is his intimidating height. When he walks into a room, everyone knows it because he stands at least a foot taller than most people. There’s something about his tall stature that makes you want to forget your inhibitions and climb him like a tree.

“Let’s fucking party,” he grins at the guys and begins walking through the lobby.

You try your best to stand off to the side and out of his line of sight but Sophie and Ashleigh link their arms with you and drag you with them, making damn sure they get his attention in the process. You can’t help but enjoy the way his eyes bulge slightly as he takes you in. You also like the way you notice him adjusting his dick uncomfortably without drawing any attention to what he’s doing but you know.

There’s a couple of black vans waiting for you all outside. Sophie, Asleigh and you all pile into one of the vans, letting the guys work out who is going in each one. You can’t help the butterflies in your stomach when Colson climbs into the same van as you but they tamper down when he pushes his way to the back, away from you. Ashleigh doesn’t allow you to dwell on it for too long, dragging you into a conversation about the club.

Why the fuck is she dressed like that?

Colson’s already pent up frustration is at a boiling point as he studies your smooth thigh from the back of the van. As if it wasn’t bad enough that you left him high and hard after the concert, now you have to go teasing him with your curves, breasts on full display in your tight top and sexy legs all exposed in your short skirt. Not to mention those boots. He’d pay a lot of money to have you in his room in just those boots. Rook is so invested in what he’s saying that he doesn’t even notice you’ve barely said a word and you’re grateful. This is going to be a long fucking night.

Colson peels his eyes away from you when the van comes to a stop and he can finally free himself. The smell of your perfume is filling his senses and it’s intoxicating enough that he’s not sure he can control himself. When he steps out of the van, he’s immediately greeted by the flash of cameras. A couple of bouncers from the club push their way through and escort you past the paparazzi. Colson has to resist the urge to turn around and make sure you’re ok. He knows that Rook will be standing on one side of you to protect you from the bodies trying to push their way towards you all, holding you to his side.

Lucky bastard.

When you all get into the club a manager with too much cologne and greasy hair directs everyone straight to a VIP section in the back. It sits on a raised platform that gives just enough leverage to see the dancefloor but not so much that it looks like a stage for everyone to gawk at. The lighting is slightly darker in the space, creating shadows in the corners of the couches for privacy. Colson immediately orders a shit ton of drinks, wanting to make sure he’s completely numb so he doesn’t think about you. Easier said than done if you weren’t three feet from him and looking like sex on legs.

When did I start fucking pining?

This was completely new territory for him. He was used to having women throw themselves at him so when you came along and said ‘thanks but no thanks’ it flipped everything upside down for him and he didn’t like it. He was always in control, he didn’t like giving that up for anybody. For you though, maybe he could make an exception.

You loved this club! The music was a mix of all your favourite artists and the DJ didn’t feel the need to constantly interrupt the tracks but talking over the lyrics with dumb catchphrases or shit singing. The dance floor was crowded but not suffocating and there didn’t appear to be many creepy men trying to grind up on unsuspecting women. Colson had ordered several rounds of shots and you were buzzed. You dragged Sophie to the dancefloor and you were so busy enjoying yourself, you barely even felt the pain in your feet from the heels. You’re sure the alcohol probably helped with that.

You were surprised that even the guys decided to join you all on the dance floor but it was entertaining watching Rook and Colson dance some ridiculous ‘routine’ they’d obviously come up with years ago. They adjusted the tempo to each song but the moves were still the same. A lot more shimming than you’re used to seeing two grown men do but entertaining nonetheless.

When an RnB track begins and the beat slows, your own dance moves change. You go from jumping around to grinding and swaying your hips to the beat. You don’t resist when Colson moves closer to you, you like feeling his chest against your arm. You let the music take you. You turn your body so that you’re facing him, winding an arm behind his neck. He presses himself to you and you can feel his arousal through his tight pants. You both sway to the music, his hands on your hips determining your movements. You turn so your ass is right against his crotch. You grind so hard against him, you’re practically dry humping him in the middle of the club. His face is buried in your neck and you can feel the vibration every time he moans.

You’re enjoying yourself way too much but as quickly as it begins, the song changes and a boppy pop song begins to play. You pull yourself away from Colson and return to dancing with Ashleigh and Sophie, Baze and Slim exchange a look but you ignore that. Colson’s glare is so intense, you’re pretty sure he’s plotting your death but you couldn’t care less.

You’re drunk enough that you’re happy but not so drunk you’re going to be sick. It’s a fun balance that you’re not mad about. When you stumble into the silent lobby with Rook, the two of you are in such loud fits of laughter that the night manager shushes you from behind the desk. You giggle an apology to him and all the others scold the two of you. Colson trails behind the group like a sad puppy but you don’t really notice.

You make it to your floor and everyone piles out, mumbling good nights to each other as you each stop at your respective doors.

You’re the last one in the hallway because you’re searching through your clutch for your room key with one eye closed, at least you think you’re alone. Colson grips your wrist and drags you into his room, slamming the door behind him.

“What do I have to do to get you to let me fuck you?!” he growls angrily and you stumble back from the volume of his voice.

“I…” you start but you don’t really know how to end the sentence so you stop to think for a moment. An idea dawns on you and you grin evilly. “Beg,” you whisper seductively.

“W-what?” Colson is staring at you like you’ve grown a second head.

“You heard me, I want you to beg for me to fuck you, right here, right now.”

You’re practically purring in his ear now. Your tongue flicks his earlobe every now again for emphasis. You can tell it’s bringing him to his knees as he sways again. Sweet, innocent you commanding devilish him to beg for your affections? Unheard of.

“Please baby, I need you,” he whines and you smile against his neck.

“What do you need?” you kiss his jawline.

“Your…dripping wet pussy on my throbbing cock while you scream my name.”

You didn’t expect something so dirty to come out of his mouth and you can’t help the blush that spreads across your cheeks. You’d think after reading so many dirty novels that you could control your reactions but you know that there is a huge difference between reading a fictional character and actually listening to a living, breathing guy saying it. Especially when it’s a guy like Colson and especially when he’s saying those things about you.

“Demanding thing aren’t you?” you tease him with a tight smile.

If he knew how much you were throbbing for him, your control would be revoked and you’d be putty in his hands. You trail your fingertips down his chest and he watches the path they lead to the hem of his t-shirt. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say he was panting with anticipation. You want to tease him but the aching between your legs is begging you to stop being so damn cruel to her. When you lift his top and scrape your nails over his ‘Almost Famous’ tattoo, he all but falls to his knees in front of you.

“Please?” Colson whispers against the shell of your ear and you know exactly what he wants.

You cup his growing erection in the palm of your hand and gently rub against his jeans. He lets out a shuddering breath and throws his head back, resting himself against the door. You watch as he all but crumbles in front of you. A mixture of pleasure and relief plastered across his face but then anguish. You pull your hand back and cup it against your chest protectively.

“I’m sorry, I can’t do this,” you mutter and step away from him, he follows you though.

“No, please don’t stop,” he’s begging you again but this time, you’re not enjoying it.

Your vagina is cursing you out but you tune her out. Every time you try to get some distance between you and Colson, he follows. You end up jumping across the bed so that he can’t follow you. You hold up your hand to halt him and even in the dim light from the lamp, you can see the hurt in his eyes. You know you’re being cruel and confusing but you can’t help it. You have questions you need answered and half drunk and horny Colson is the only one that will give them to you.

“What is this?” you wave a hand between the two of you and he groans.

“Why do you women need everything defined?” he scrubs his hands over his face and sits on the floor with a huff. “Just enjoy the goddamn moment and be grateful.”

“Grateful for you? I don’t fucking think so.” for the second time tonight, Colson looks at you like you’ve grown a second head.

“What the hell does that mean?”

“Who’d be grateful for a selfish, moody, cruel man like you? One minute you’re warm and gentle and the next you’re giving everyone that ‘fuck off’ attitude you’ve perfected and not talking to anyone for days. You’ve made Ashleigh’s life a living hell over the last few months and you could care less,” he winces but you’re not finished. “One of your oldest friends in the world and all you’ve done is be an asshole to her for no good reason.”

“Fuck you! Just because you don’t know the reason, doesn’t mean it’s not a good one,” he spits at you and you step back like he’s pushed you.

“Ok, fine then. What’s the perfectly justified reason for why you’ve been such an asshole to everyone? Why have you been drinking, screwing and snorting your way to an early grave no matter who it hurts?”

“BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO BE HERE ANYMORE!” he screams and jumps to his feet.

You’ve seen Colson get mad, hell you’ve seen him in fights with actual punches and blood, but this mad is so different. He practically morphes into a new person before your eyes and it terrifies you. You try to not show it but you can tell by the way he tries to calm himself that he notices your fear.

“I…I never thought I’d be the guy whose happiness depends on another person but when she left, I couldn’t shut the voices up.”

By ‘she’, you can only assume he’s referring to his ex fiance Megan who left him for her ex-husband and to be honest, he’d made it seem like the whole thing didn’t bother him. No one was stupid enough to believe him but given that he pretty much jumped back into single life and didn’t start acting out until 12 months after their break up, everyone assumed the two were unrelated. You should’ve known better and you feel guilty that you didn’t.

“I thought you didn’t care,” you whisper but then you smack yourself for saying something so dumb.

“To be honest, I didn’t. We hadn’t been happy for a long time and I was relieved when she ended things. The anxiety started when I asked myself one question ‘why wasn’t she happy with me?’ and then ‘what’s wrong with me?’. It just played on some already pretty strong insecurities.”

It made sense. You’d gone through enough break ups to know that even if it’s the most amicable break up in the history of break ups, you always end up asking yourself those exact same questions and sometimes the unknown will eat you up inside. You have this uncontrollable thought that you’re the problem, that one particular thing you did, what it was you’ll never know, pushed that person to stop loving you. Makes them realise you’re not right for them, not good enough for them, not desirable enough for them. If you don’t have strong-will and a little bit of self-confidence and esteem, the thoughts become all consuming and you never open yourself up to anyone ever again.

“There were other issues that already existed so I’m not blaming everything on that but I thought if I pushed people away, I could at least minimise the damage.”

“What were the other things?” you ask before you can stop yourself and judging by the look on his face, you don’t want to know the answer.

“You,” he whispers and your breath stills.

****************

Tag list:

@mgklove99xx

#colson baker #machine gun kelly #mgk #tickets to my downfall #mgk imagine #ttmdf #colson x reader #colson baker imagine #machine gun kelly imagine #mgk x reader #mgk fanfic #mgk smut #mgk x y/n #machine gun kelly smut #machine gun kelly x reader #machine gun kelly angst

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kissgunkelly · 2 years

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JXDN PRAY MV icons / headers

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storiesforallfandoms · 7 months

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all the mistakes ~ machine gun kelly

word count: 2866

request?: yes!

“I just started reading your stuff and I'm in love with the Colson stories!

I was wondering if you could do Colson x reader. Reader finds out she's pregnant by Colson and he doesn't think he's ready to be a dad again and abandons reader but then realizes a couple months later that he's truly in love with her and does everything he can to win her back?

If not, it's okay.. thank you ❤️”

description: in which he comes to apologize for all the mistakes he’s made leading up to the birth of their child

pairing: machine gun kelly x female!reader

warnings: swearing, child birth (not in detail obviously), lil angsty and sad but it ends happy, rpf (if you don’t like it don’t read)

masterlist (one, two, three)

Colson always said he wanted another kid. Especially once Casie started to go through her pre-teen years and he found himself wishing she was still a baby again. He and (Y/N) had talked about it so many times, and they had both agreed that they wanted to have a baby together.

So why did he run away when she actually got pregnant?

Colson could still remember it all so vividly: the look of happiness on (Y/N)’s face when she showed him the positive pregnancy test, the heavy feeling in his stomach that turned to panic that rose into his throat, the sound of (Y/N)’s voice as he grabbed some of his things and left without another word. He could remember the sound of his phone constantly chiming as (Y/N) tried to text and call him, until finally he had to put her contact on mute. It didn’t take her long to give up trying to contact him, though.

He didn’t know why he did it. He had been asked by so many people - his boys, his mom, Ash, even Casie herself - but he had no answer. When (Y/N) first told him she wanted to have kids with him, he had been so excited. So where did his sudden panic come from when it actually happened? Why was he suddenly so doubtful over his ability to be a father again?

He couldn’t bring himself to go back. He was embarrassed for the way he reacted, and he thought (Y/N) wouldn’t take him back anyways. Not that he blamed her. How could she take back the man who got her pregnant and then ran out on her? Because of his reluctance and fear of rejection, Colson didn’t see (Y/N) for months. And he would’ve kept it that way if it wasn’t for Casie throwing his car keys at him and forcing him out of the house.

“You have to go see her,” Casie said as she slammed the door in her father’s face and locked it.

“You gave me my keys, Cas, I can get back in,” he pointed out.

She held up the house key that usually hung on Colson’s keyring. “I took it off. You’re not getting back in until you go see (Y/N) and apologize for being stupid.”

“She’s not gonna wanna see me.”

“You don’t know that! She’s carrying your child, and I’d doubt she seriously wants that kid to grow up without a dad.”

Colson didn’t want to admit that he thought (Y/N) probably got rid of the baby the second he walked out on her. “Cas, come on, just let me back in.”

But Casie just crossed her arms and glared at him. After a few minutes, Colson sighed and rolled his eyes. There was no use in trying to get back in unless he did exactly what Casie wanted, so he went to his car and drove the familiar route to get to (Y/N)’s place.

At least I can get the rejection over with quickly and get back into my own house, he thought to himself.

Pulling up to her house, Colson started picturing the night he left again. He wanted nothing more than to turn his car around and go back home, but he knew Casie could tell if he was lying to her. His hands were shaking as he shut his car off and put the keys into his pocket. He was almost hoping that (Y/N) wasn’t home. Maybe if she wasn’t, Casie would drop it and let him back into the house without having to actually deal with the situation.

But her car was in the driveway, so she had to be home.

Colson made his way up to the front door and raised his hand to knock. He hesitated, unable to make his hand move. His brain was still screaming at him to turn around and go home, but he had come this far. He couldn’t just back out now. At the very least, maybe he could give (Y/N) some closure so they could both move on from this, since he knew there was no way that she was going to take him back.

He finally moved his hand to knock. It didn’t take long for him to hear the sound of footsteps coming towards the door, and when the door opened it felt like the floodgates within him had opened.

(Y/N) was stood there, her belly big enough to tell him that she was still carrying his child. She had never looked so beautiful to him before.

Her eyes were wide, almost like a deer caught in headlights. He was the last person she expected to see on her doorstep, and she wasn’t sure if she wanted to slam the door in his face or throw herself into his arms and beg for him to never let her go again.

“Hey,” Colson finally said. “Uh...I’m sorry to surprise you like this. I probably should’ve called first or something.”

“You wouldn’t have gotten through. I blocked your number,” she told him.

Ouch, he thought. I deserve that, though.

“What are you doing here?” she asked. “If it’s to finally get the last of your stuff that you left here, I have it in boxes in the spare room. I can bring it all down and send you on your way within five minutes.”

There was a lot he wanted to say in response to that, but instead he found himself saying, “You probably shouldn’t be lifting too much or going up and down the stairs a lot in your condition.”

Her face darkened as she glared at him. “Don’t pretend you give a shit now.”

Colson sighed and shook his head. “You’re right, I’m sorry. Can I come in? I just wanted to talk, to apologize.”

(Y/N) scoffed. “You leave me when I tell you I’m pregnant - with a baby that you wanted, might I add - and you leave for months, with no calls or texts or anything. And now you think you can come back and just...apologize for all of that?”

“I know, I fucked up - ”

“No, you don’t know,” she cut him off. “You really fucked up. You beyond fucked up, actually. You don’t understand how much it hurt me when you just walked out. You didn’t answer any of my calls or texts. I thought you were going to be happy when I told you I was pregnant. We talked about starting our own family for so long, and I thought you’d be overjoyed for this. But you just walked out and didn’t come back. You do not understand how hard that was for me to deal with, how hard it still is to deal with, while also trying to deal with this pregnancy all on my own!”

She was starting to cry. She mentally cursed her pregnancy hormones for making her so much more susceptible to tears lately. She didn’t want him to see her cry, especially not over him.

When he extended his arms to her, though, she gladly took the comforting hug. She sobbed into his chest, trying to take in his familiar smell and warmth without letting him back in too much. He couldn’t just come in and demand a second chance like this, but she also couldn’t lie and say she wasn’t relieved to see him on her doorstep.

Colson guided her into the house, closing the door behind them and bringing (Y/N) to her living room. They both sat down on her couch and (Y/N) wiped the tears from her eyes. She reached for a tissue from a box on one of her side tables and blew her nose as well.

“I had to start leaving tissue boxes in every room,” she sighed. “Stupid fucking hormones. I cry at everything now.”

“At least you’ve managed to prepare yourself for it,” Colson said.

She sighed and wiped at her face again. She felt so puffy and gross, and not just from the crying. The pregnancy had made her feel so many negative emotions. Even now, when she was supposed to be mad at Colson, she found herself self conscious about her round belly and how it made her look to him.

“Why did you leave?” she asked him. “I thought you wanted another baby.”

“I do,” he responded. “I should’ve been so goddamn excited when you told me you were pregnant. I think I would’ve felt that way if I wasn’t such an idiot instead and started feeling doubt about being a father again.”

(Y/N) furrowed her eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

“I mean...I panicked when you told me. I found myself thinking about if I was cut out to be a dad again. Like, what if I ended up missing so much of the baby’s life the same way I did with Casie? I wasn’t ready to be a dad when Emma was pregnant with Casie because I was so young, and I found myself back in that mindset when you told me you were pregnant. Just this sudden panic and self doubt.”

“But we talked about this. You said you wanted another baby.”

“I know. I don’t understand it either. It’s just my fucked up brain ruining everything again.”

(Y/N) placed her hand on Colson’s in a comforting gesture. “You’re not fucked up, and you are an amazing dad to Casie. I have no doubts that you’ll be even better with this baby, especially now since you’re older and have experience.”

Colson shook his head and let out a humorless laugh. “I can’t believe I was so stupid to let myself get worked up like that, though. I should’ve been so excited. We should’ve had a big ass fucking party to celebrate, and then you should’ve been moving into my house so we could start this family together. I shouldn’t have run out the door and left you like that.”

“Why didn’t you ever call or text me before now?”

“I felt embarrassed and stupid for my reaction. For the longest time, I just felt like I couldn’t face what I did, or face you. And then the more that time went on, the more I felt like coming back was a mistake. I figured you would kick me to the curb and tell me to never speak to you again. I thought...I thought that...if you even still had our baby, that you’d never let me see them anyways.”

(Y/N) found herself running her fingers along the back of his hand. What he was saying all made sense, and she felt like she believed him. She didn’t think he was malicious in leaving her. He didn’t do it because he was an asshole, he did it because he panicked suddenly and made a bonehead move, then his embarrassment got the better of him and made him overthink the situation even further. It didn’t completely heal the wound that his leaving had left inside of her, but it was enough to make her think she could possibly forgive him.

“If you had shown interest, I would’ve let you see her,” she said. “I would never keep you from your daughter if you wanted to be in her life.”

Tears were forming in Colson’s eyes as he looked up at (Y/N). “It’s a girl? You know that for sure?”

(Y/N) could feel herself welling up again, too. She nodded and got up to get the ultrasound she kept on the fridge. She passed it to Colson and sat down next to him.

“That’s her,” she said. “She was once the size of a peanut when I got my first sonogram, and now she’s a fully formed baby.”

“I can’t believe I’m gonna have another daughter,” Colson breathed.

“In a good way or a bad way?”

“Definitely a good way. I would’ve loved to have a son, but if there’s anything that being Casie’s dad has taught me, it’s that I love being a girl dad.” He placed the ultrasound on the coffee table and turned to face (Y/N). “I love you, too. More than anything, (Y/N). I was such a fucking idiot to ruin us the way I did, but I never stopped loving you in that time we had apart. I wanted nothing more than to call you or to show up on your doorstep like I did today, but I was terrified of what your reaction would be if I did.”

“I love you, too,” (Y/N) replied. It was the truth. She hadn’t stopped loving Colson, no matter how angry or upset he had made her. She loved him so much, and she felt like carrying his child had made her love him even more. “But you hurt me a lot. I meant what I said, you can’t just come in and say you’re sorry and suddenly everything goes back to normal.”

“I know, and I’ll do anything to win back your trust. Whatever you want, (Y/N), I’ll do it.”

“Right now, I want you to be here for the rest of my pregnancy, and I want you to be there when your daughter is born. We can take things from there.”

Colson nodded. “Will you come stay with me and Casie at least? I intended on asking you to move in with me anyways, and I know that’s a big ask right now, but I want you to be there and to start making it your home, because eventually it will be. Your home, and hers.” He put his hand on her bump, thinking about how his baby girl was growing in there.

(Y/N)’s eyes lit up as she nodded. “Give me a few minutes to pack a few things, and then we can head over. I want to see Casie anyways. I’ve missed her so much.”

~~~~~~

A few months later, Colson and (Y/N) were on the way to the hospital in the middle of the night. (Y/N) had woken up to pee and ended up having her water break. She woke Colson with her surprised shriek and he got everything together for the two of them to go to the hospital. Casie was at Emma’s, so Colson texted Emma to let her know that the baby was coming and to let Casie know that she would be a big sister by the time she woke up.

The labor pains weren’t as bad as (Y/N) expected, but they were still certainly the worst pain she had ever felt. Colson stayed by her side through the entire process, just like he promised. He let (Y/N) use his hand as a stress ball, crushing it with every contraction pain she felt. He stayed in the room after the doctor’s announced it was time to push and, even though he did feel a little lightheaded during the birthing process, he stayed to hear his baby girl cry for the first time.

The doctors let him cut the umbilical cord before they washed the baby girl and wrapped her in a soft, pastel pink blanket. The doctor passed Colson the baby and Colson sat next to (Y/N) so she could see her, too.

“She’s so beautiful,” (Y/N) breathed. “Besides the fact that she looks like a little prune.”

Colson chuckled. “Yeah, she definitely needs a day or two to look less wrinkly, but she’s gorgeous. You really did it, baby.”

(Y/N) mustered enough strength to reach out and lightly graze the baby’s cheek with her finger. “She was definitely worth all that pain and the exhaustion. Although, to be honest, I don’t think I can fight the sleep much longer.”

Colson leaned over to kiss her cheek. “Get some rest. When you’re feeling up to it, we’ll get Casie to come see her baby sister.”

(Y/N)’s eyes started to close, but Colson could see that she was trying to fight her fatigue. “We haven’t named her yet.”

“We can do that when you wake up. We have so much time to get everything figured out. You already did all of the hard stuff, let me help out with this side of things.”

She smiled, sheepishly, and forced her eyes open for another moment to look at Colson. “I love you.”

He smiled back at her. “I love you, too. More than you could ever know. Now, get some rest. We’ll both be here when you wake up.”

(Y/N) nodded and finally closed her eyes. It didn’t take her long to drift off to sleep. Colson stood so he could put the baby in the bed that the nurses had brought in to put next to (Y/N)’s bed. She had already stopped crying and had also been lulled to sleep in Colson’s arms. When he had her laid down, he stepped back to look at his two girls. He smiled and couldn’t help the tears that started to well up in his eyes. He couldn’t be any happier than he was in that moment.

#machine gun kelly #machine gun kelly imagine #machine gun kelly x reader #colson baker #colson baker imagine #colson baker x reader #imagine #one shot #request #fanfiction #fanfic #fandom #rpf

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