#like you did when you lied about why my friend broke your ship up | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

just-dreaming-marvel · 2 years

Text

The Bond Between Us ~ 47

THE BOND BETWEEN US MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 4,375ish

Summary: Leia and Obi-Wan head to Mapuzo after Obi-Wan finds out Anakin is alive. Of course, things don’t go to plan.

Notes: please share your reactions!

Obi-Wan sat on his knees, on the floor, toward the front of the cargo ship. He was desperately trying to meditate through his emotions and the newfound revelation that Anakin was alive.

“Master Qui-Gon,” Obi-Wan whispered to himself, trying to reach out to his former Master. “Master… Are you there, Master?”

“You didn’t know,” the Third Sister’s voice rang out in his head. “He’s alive, Obi-Wan.”

“Only pain will you find,” Yoda’s voice was next.

“Obi-Wan…”

“Obi-Wan, promise me you will train the boy,” then it was Qui-Gon’s last desperate plea.

Your voice about broke him completely. “By helping Ani, you are helping me, Obi.” He wished that that had truly been so.

“If you are not with me, then you’re my enemy,” Anakin’s voice was harsh in his head as Obi-Wan wrung his hands together. “Don’t make me kill you. I do not fear the dark side. I see through the lies of the Jedi.”

“Help me, Master Qui-Gon,” Obi-Wan begged quietly. “Give me strength.”

“Anakin Skywalker is alive,” the Third Sister’s voice taunted. Obi-Wan’s eyes finally opened. “And he’s been looking for you for a long time.”

Obi-Wan could feel Vader through the Force. “He’s coming, Master.”

After realizing that he would truly not get aware through meditating right now, Obi-Wan moved back to wear Leia was. He took her droid, Lola, found some tools, and began to fix the little droid up. As he did so, he had a hard time not imagining Anakin excitedly doing the same thing for the girl.

“Are we almost there?” Leia asked. “Can’t you make this thing go any faster?”

“It’s a trade route, Leia,” Obi-Wan responded exasperatedly. “I’m not in control of it.”

“Can’t you use the Force on it or something?”

“That’s not how it works.”

“How does it work? The Force. What does it feel like?”

Obi-Wan thought for a moment, trying to figure out how to explain it in simple terms. He turned back to look at her. “Have you ever been afraid of the dark?” Leia nodded. “How does it feel when you turn on the light?”

“I feel safe.”

“Yes, it feels like that.” He nodded as he held out his hand and gave the girl back her droid.

“Lola!” She excitedly took the droid from him. “You fixed her.” She pressed the button that turned the droid one. “Thank you.”

Obi-Wan gave her a small smile, one that didn’t meet the eyes. He stared at the droid and wished that Anakin could have been the one to fix it for Leia. The one to make his daughter happy. Leia’s eyes caught a glimpse of the chain and ring that slipped out of Obi-Wan’s robes.

“What’s that?” Leia asked, pointing at the ring.

Obi-Wan looked down. He quickly grabbed the ring and stuffed it into his robes so that it rested against his chest. “Nothing,” he replied.

“It’s a ring. Whose ring is it?”

“It’s mine.”

“Why do you have it?”

Obi-Wan sighed. He went to respond when the ship beeped and rumbled. “We better get ready,” he said, standing. “We’re on approach.”

Obi-Wan watched out of the window as the ship landed them on the top of a flat cliff. He could see that there were only droids in charge of unloading the cargo. He was grateful for that but knew that they still needed to be careful. Keeping Leia close to his side, Obi-Wan led her away from the cargo ship, down the cliff, and onto one of the trails. He followed the coordinates that Haja had given them.

“What is this place?” Leia asked as they walked.

“Mapuzo,” Obi-Wan answered. “It’s a mining system. Coordinates say the meeting point is further north. That is if our new friend was telling the truth.”

“Why would he lie?”

“People are not all good, Leia.” He snapped looking down at her. He saw stormtroopers in the distance. “It wasn’t always like this here. There were fields and families. And then the Empire came in and ravaged it all.”

“Thought the Empire was supposed to be helping us.”

“Well, there are some, like your dad, who is trying to. Seems like a losing battle these days.”

Obi-Wan looked out in the distance, slowing down to a stop. There stood Anakin, as Obi-Wan had seen him on the day they said goodbye before he went to hunt down Grievous and you went to your star cruiser. Anakin’s arms were folded over his chest, with his cloak hood over his head. He stared down Obi-Wan, menacingly.

“Ben?” Leia called. “Ben?”

Obi-Wan looked down as Leia stepped closer to him. He placed a hand on her shoulder before looking back up and seeing nothing where he had thought Anakin had been.

“Stay close,” Obi-Wan ordered.

~~~

The door to your cell slid open, You didn’t have to open your eyes to know who was marching in.

“I found Kenobi,” the Third Sister told you. You masked your horror, biting the inside of your cheek as your stomach sank. “I lured him out by using the daughter of Senator Organa.”

Your eyes snapped open. “What?” You questioned, not caring if you just gave away anything.

“They are now on a mining planet… Lord Vader and I are heading there to lead the hunt… I told him that Anakin’s alive. Seemed to have not known. But you did. And you never told him.” You ground your teeth together. “Why would you do that?”

“You know nothing,” you growled. You used the wall to push yourself off the ground and onto your feet, using all the strength you had. “You think you do but you don’t.” You threw your hand out and used the Force to slam her against the opposite wall. You were panting, pushing yourself to your weak limit. “I will protect Obi-Wan until my dying breath. Even if that meant keeping the truth about Anakin from him.”

“How noble you are.” The Third Sister tried to move free from your grip, but you strained as you pushed yourself harder to keep her there.”

“You underestimated my strength, which was very unwise of you.”

The woman scoffed. “Your strength is failing you. I can hear the hammering of your heart and see the sweat beginning to drip down your face. You are not as strong as you once were. We have broken you down into nothing. Don’t think I can’t feel your signature slowly slipping away. You don’t have much longer.”

The Third Sister’s arm came out and tossed you across the room and into one of the side walls. You groaned as you hit the wall. Your head was fuzzy as you tried to focus on the Third Sister. She laughed as she walked over and crouched beside you.

“Kenobi will die by Anakin’s hand,” she taunted. “How do you feel about that?”

You panted, unable to find a good enough response as you tried to reign in your emotions. You would not let her see you cry.

“I’m sure Vader will stop by to tell you the news,” she continued. “I’ll see you then… if you’re still around.”

You watched as the Third Sister stood. She laughed as she exited the room and the door slid shut behind her. Once you were alone, you allowed yourself to cry.

~~~

Obi-Wan and Leia continued walking down the trail to where the coordinates led.

“Now, remember, if anyone asks, we’re farmers from Tawl,” Obi-Wan told her. “You’re my daughter, and you don’t talk.”

“I can’t talk, or I don’t like to talk?” Leia questioned.

“You don’t talk.”

“Got it.”

Obi-Wan stopped and looked around. “This is it. This is where he told us to come to.”

“Maybe they’re just late?”

“Maybe it was a lie. I knew it! I never should’ve trusted him.”

“We don’t know if maybe—“

“No one is coming here, Leia.”

Leia stepped passed Obi-Wan and noticed something coming in the distance. “Well, if we’re on our own, we’re gonna need some help.” She headed toward the road, waving her arms in the air.

“What are you doing?”

“Maybe they can give us a ride to the spaceport.”

“But it’s not safe.”

“He seems friendly.” Leia picked up speed toward the ship coming.

“Leia.” Obi-Wan jogged to catch up, feeling as if he was chasing after Anakin again. “Well, keep your head down. And remember, you don’t talk.” The ship stopped and Leia went up to it.

“Hi! I’m Luma,” Leia greeted. “This is my friend—my father. This is my father, Orden. We’re farmers from Tawl.”

“Hey, there,” the creature replied. “I’m Freck.”

“Father, aren’t you going to say hello?”

Obi-Wan gave a nervous nod and swallowed. “Hello,” he greeted.

“We were going on a trip, and we got a little lost in this field.”

“That’s a weird story,” Freck said, uneasy.

“We got a bit turned around,” Obi-Wan clarified. “We’re looking for the nearest port. We need to get home.”

“Well, I’m going that way. Jump in.”

“Oh, no, that’s alright. Thank you. We just need directions.”

“Come on, father, we’ve walked long enough,” Leia said, heading to the back. “Thanks, Freck.”

“My pleasure,” Freck responded. “Hop in.” Obi-Wan followed Leia into the back. “Don’t worry. I’ll get you to the port in no time.” Obi-Wan noticed the symbol of the Empire on the back and knew they had to be more careful. “Now, where’d you say you’re from again?”

“Tawl,” Obi-Wan and Leia responded together.

“Oh, good people out in Tawl. They pay their way, listen to the Empire.”

“Absolutely,” Leia replied. “We love the Empire.”

“Nice to meet like-minded folk. Nothing wrong with a little order, right?”

Freck slowed down when he saw four stormtroopers waving him down. Obi-Wan sat up straighter, putting a hand on Leia’s shoulder while the other one pulled his clock around him more.

“Transport late again?” Freck asked the troopers.

“As usual,” one of them responded.

“Well, hop in. Meet my new friends.”

“Thanks, Freck.”

The stormtroopers came around and joined Obi-Wan and Leia. Two sat on the bench across from Obi-Wan and Leia, while the other two sat next to Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan crossed his arms over his chest to make sure his cloak couldn’t move and reveal the sabers on his hips. Once the troopers were on board, Freck started making his way again.

“This is Orden and Luma,” Freck introduced. “They’re hitchin’ a ride to the port. Where are you all comin’ from?”

“They’re movin’ us around,” one of the troopers responded. “Looking for a Jedi.”

“A Jedi? Out here? I hope we’re not in any danger.”

“Ah, no, we’ll find him,” a trooper replied. “We always do.”

“You a miner?” A trooper asked Obi-Wan.

“Farmer from, uh, Tawl,” he answered.

“What are you doin’ out here?”

“That’s a long story.”

“It’s a long way.”

“He brought me here to see the place where he met my mother before she…” Leia cut in, trailing off.

Obi-Wan put a comforting hand on Leia before bringing it back to help keep his cloak on. “She’s not with us anymore,” he added. “Been a very difficult time.”

“What about you?” The trooper questioned. “You have any information about a Jedi?”

“I wouldn’t know one if I saw one.”

“You haven’t heard anything?”

“Nothing,” Leia confirmed. “Are you sure he’s even on this planet?”

“They know what they’re doing, Leia,” Obi-Wan slipped.

“I’m just, I—“

“You called her Leia,” the trooper noticed. “I thought her name was Luma.”

“That was her mother’s name,” Obi-Wan said. “I get confused. Like I said, it’s not been easy. Sometimes when I look at Luma,” he turned to Leia, “I see her mother’s face. We all miss her very much.” There was too much truth to his response, Leia could feel it too.

“Well, just keep your eyes open. Report it if you see anything.”

“Of course,” Obi-Wan and Leia responded in unison.

“This is us!” Another stormtrooper shouted, hitting the ship. “Thanks, Freck!”

The vehicle stopped, allowing the stormtroopers out. Freck quickly started it up again and moved on. Obi-Wan and Leia sighed in relief. Leia stared at Obi-Wan in deep thought, he noticed.

“What?” Obi-Wan questioned.

“You knew her, my real mother, didn’t you?” She asked.

“It was just a story.” He shook his head slightly.

“The whole time I’ve known you, you’ve been hiding something. Lying to me.”

“Leia.”

“Are you my real father?”

Obi-Wan moved to show her that he was listening and serious. “I wish that I could say I was, but no, I’m not.”

“Sometimes I try to imagine what he was like.”

He would have adored you, he wished to say aloud but couldn’t. “I know that feeling,” he decided on. “As Jedi, we’re taken from our families when we’re very young. I still have glimpses, flashes really, my mother’s shawl, my father’s hands. I remember a baby.”

“A baby?”

“Yes, I think I had a brother. Really don’t remember him. I wished I did… Then I joined the Jedi, and I got a new family just like you.” The sound of breaks caught Obi-Wan’s attention. He looked forward to see stormtroopers and a laser gate. “Freck? Freck? Can we get off here?”

“Oh, it’s a standard inspection,” Freck responded. “Don’t worry, won’t take long. I know these fellas.”

The vehicle stopped and Freck went out to talk to the stormtroopers. Obi-Wan watched the troopers as they eyed him and Leia. He pulled his hood over his head for more protection as the stormtroopers came around to the back.

“Not a lot of reasons to be in the outpost today,” one of the stormtroopers stated. “Where are you headed?”

“Uh, back to Tawl,” Obi-Wan replied. “We have family here we were visiting.”

“Alright, step out of the vehicle.” The trooper brought his comlink up to his mask. “Initiate protocol 23.”

Obi-Wan and Leia obeyed. Obi-Wan turned to climb down, unclipped his blaster, and helped Leia to the ground. He kept his head down but still noticed the probe droid coming toward them. He stepped in front of Leia, using his arm to keep her behind him.

“Raise your head,” the trooper ordered. “I said raise your head.”

The two troopers aimed their blasters at Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan raised his head as his hand slowly moved toward his gun. He waited until the probe had basically identified him to shoot at the probe's eye, successfully killing it. He took out one of the troopers and began taking out the rest. Obi-Wan grabbed Freck and used him as a shield, while he shot down the ones standing on top of the gate posts. Then Obi-Wan knocked Freck out. He turned to see that a stormtrooper had a hold of Leia. Obi-Wan put his hands in the air.”

“Put it down!” The trooper ordered, aiming at Leia. “Put it down!”

“Alright,” Obi-Wan said calmly, slowly lowering himself, “I’m putting it down. I’m putting it down. Just…” Leia whimpered. “Let the girl—“ Obi-Wan aimed past Leia, setting her free. She ran to him and took his hand. “Come on.”

Obi-Wan and Leia rushed over and flipped the switch to turn off the laser gate. When it didn’t work, Obi-Wan tried firing at it, successfully. The two ran through where the gate once was but halted when another group of stormtroopers with an Imperial Officer rolled in.

“Get down!” A female stormtrooper demanded. “Get down on the ground!” Leia and Obi-Wan both got down on their knees. “Put your head down.”

Obi-Wan obeyed. He flinched when he first heard a blast but looked up to see the Imperial Officer shooting down the stormtroopers.

“Come on,” the Imperial Officer said. “They’ll have sent a transmission. We have to hurry. I’ll take you the rest of the way.”

~~~

The female Imperial Officer led Obi-Wan and Leia to a camp and into a droid maintenance building. There was a droid, NED-B, who was there to help. NED-B opened a secret doorway. Obi-Wan guided Leia into it with the woman close behind. Obi-Wan looked around the small room.

“What is this place?” He asked.

“We have safe houses like this throughout the Galaxy,” she explained. “Trying to link the systems. Some call it the Path. You’re not the first Jedi to come through here.” Her eyes motioned to the walls of carvings. “It all leads to Jabiim, and from there, we give them new identities and get them out. There’s a lot of good people risking their lives out there.”

“Are they all Jedi?” Wondered Leia.

“Not all,” the woman chuckled breathily. “These days, the Empire hunts anyone who’s Force-sensitive. Even children.”

“What happens to them?”

“We’re not sure. But no one ever sees them again.”

Obi-Wan began studying the carvings on the walls. One, in particular, caught his attention. He brought his hand up to run his fingers across it. “Quinlan was here,” he said.

“Yeah, he helps now and again. Smuggling younglings.” Obi-Wan couldn’t help but smile briefly before turning back to the carving.

“What does it say?” Leia asked.

“Only when the eyes are closed can you truly see,” Obi-Wan read the carving aloud.

“See what?”

“The Way.” He turned back to the woman. “Do you know… do you know if a Y/N has been through one of these?”

“I know who you are talking about,” the woman responded. “And no, I do not know. Rumor had it that she was captured by Darth Vader not long into the Empire’s reign. But no one really knows for sure.”

A sudden knock sounded at the door to the droid maintenance. Obi-Wan pulled his blaster out and shoved Leia behind him. The woman got her own blaster out. They heard NED-B open the door for the demanding stormtroopers and the troopers came in to inspect the room. The hidden three stayed quiet in the secret room until they were sure the troopers were gone. The woman got her comlink out and began speaking into it.

“We’ve been compromised,” she said. “We’re coming to you right now.”

“We’re not ready,” the man on the other end said. “We need more—“

“I don’t care. Get the ship ready, and hurry.” She put her comlink down and began stripping herself of the Imperial clothes. “Someone must have seen us. We’re moving up the timeline.”

“Is it scary?” Leia asked. “Having to pretend?”

“Yeah, sometimes. But it’s worth it if I can help people.” Leia watched as the woman put a holster on her side. “I wear it on the other side. Gives me a faster draw.”

“Can you teach me how to shoot?”

“Leia,” Obi-Wan called, “come and get ready.” He pushed her over to the other side.

“She’ll make a good fighter one day,” the woman commented.

“Yes, I think you might be right… why do you do this? Risk everything?”

“I joined up when the Empire stood for something. By the time I realized what they really were, it was too late. I made some mistakes.”

“We all did.”

“I can’t imagine Obi-Wan Kenobi doing anything wrong.”

“It’s just Ben these days.”

“Well, Tala.” She slung a bag over her shoulder. “Come on, this will take us out.”

Tala pressed a button on the wall, revealing another hidden door leading into tunnels. Before they could enter, Obi-Wan gasped, feeling something overwhelming that he hadn’t felt in a long time. He stumbled, suddenly becoming weak.

“Ben?” Tala questioned. “What is it?” He leaned forward against the wall for support. “Ben.”

Obi-Wan’s breath trembled as he opened the other door and stumbled into the droid maintenance room. He went over to that final door and leaned against it, looking through the slotted windows. Tala and Leia quickly joined him. Stormtroopers were lining the streets as people rushed to hide. Obi-Wan saw the Inquisitors and a tall masked man walking down the dark and empty streets. He knew who the man was just by the Force around him.

“Get back in the room,” Obi-Wan whispered, pushing Leia back. “Go. Go. Now.” She stumbled back into the room, obeying Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan went back to watching through the window as Darth Vader continued down the street until he suddenly stopped. His arm shot out and took hold of a man, using the Force. Vader pulled him from the building he was in, choking him. A boy chanced after the man.

“No!” The boy cried. “Stop! No!” The man gasped as he floated in the air, choking. “Dad!”

Vader slammed the boy back into the wall with his free hand and the Force. With a twitch of his hand, Vader snapped the boy’s neck before dropping the father, who was also dead now. Obi-Wan watched on in horror.

“Come,” Tala whispered. “We have to go now.” She rushed back to the room. “Come on!”

“Leia,” Obi-Wan breathed out as he hurried to her. “Go with Tala. I’ll be right behind you.” He left Leia’s side and went to Tala’s. “Get her to Alderaan. Promise me. Promise me.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll lead them away.”

Obi-Wan watched as Tala and Leia rushed into the tunnels before he turned his focus onto Vader, who was still walking through the streets. Vader’s arm shot out again and he used the Force to drag a woman on the ground down the streets. The woman screamed out in pain. Obi-Wan looked around the droid maintenance area and found another way outside. He went out and watched, making sure that Vader could sense him briefly before he ran toward one of the mines.

Obi-Wan was breathing heavily when he entered one of the mining areas. He looked around, trying to see if Vader had followed him. He stopped when he saw him not far off. Vader ignited his red saber as he stared down Obi-Wan. Shakily, Obi-Wan took out his saber and held the hilt in both of his hands. Instead of igniting it, he ran off into the dunes.

“We cannot run, Obi-Wan,” Darth Vader taunted.

Obi-Wan finally ignited his blue lightsaber as he turned to try and tell which way Vader would come from. He turned in circles until finally, Vader approached.

“What have you become?” Obi-Wan questioned.

“I am what you made me,” Vader responded.

Turning off his lightsaber, Obi-Wan took off running again. He knew that he didn’t have the strength to go against Vader, which is why he was biding time. Tala just needed to get Leia off the planet. That’s all that mattered. Obi-Wan slowed down when he grew tired and was sure he had enough distance between him and Vader, who was half metal. He kept checking over his shoulder just in case.

Suddenly, a lightsaber ignited from behind Obi-Wan. He spun, igniting his own lightsaber, but stumbled back when Vader hit him with his arm. Vader began attacking Obi-Wan with his red saber. Obi-Wan was playing defense, clutching onto his saber with both hands as he blocked the kits Vader made against him. The older man did not take the hits kindly, having lost much of his fighting abilities due to lack of use over the years. Vader noticed quickly.

“The years have made you weak,” the robotic voice stated.

The two continued dueling; Obi-Wan weakly dodging attacks and straining himself while Vader attacked mercilessly with just one arm. Vader threw Obi-Wan back using the Force. Obi-Wan groaned as he struggled to get back onto his feet.

“You should’ve killed me when you had the chance,” Vader taunted, marching toward his former Master.

Obi-Wan hit a pipe along the wall of a building, causing smoke to fill the air between him and Vader. He started running again. When there was really know where left for him to go, Obi-Wan turned around to see Vader continuing toward him. Using the Force, Darth Vader knocked a container of coal down before choking Obi-Wan and lifting him up in the air. Obi-Wan gasped and groaned, his lightsaber falling out of his hand. Vader leaned down slightly, using his lightsaber to ignite the coals. The fire spread across the ground between Obi-Wan and Darth Vader.

“Now you will suffer, Obi-Wan,” Vader said.

Vader pulled Obi-Wan down into the fire, landing him on his shoulder. Obi-Wan screamed out in pain as Vader dragged him through the fire.

“Your pain has just begun.”

As Obi-Wan continued to scream in pain, stormtroopers arrived to back Darth Vader up and Tala peeked over one of the dunes with NED-B. With the Force, Vader dimmed the fire, leaving Obi-Wan moaning and groaning in pain.

“Bring him to me,” Vader ordered.

A single stormtrooper crossed the smoldering coals but was quickly shot down by Tala from where she was. The other troopers aimed her way but didn’t know where to fire. She shot again, this time aiming for a nearby fuel cell that reignited the fire, bring this time. Thankfully, Obi-Wan had crawled from the coals as best as he could. NED-B went down and picked up the injured Obi-Wan. Vader watched on through the flames as stormtroopers failed to hit the droid and Obi-Wan got away.

NED-B and Tala safely got Obi-Wan behind another dune. NED-B laid Obi-Wan down to Tala could check his injuries. Obi-Wan was panting and groaning in pain as he went in and out of consciousness.

“Ready the transport,” Tala told NED-B. “We have to get him to Jabiim.” NED-B hurried away as Tala focused back on the injured man. “You’re going to be okay.”

next chapter >

TAGLIST IS CLOSED - Taglist Information

161 notes · View notes

nirikeehan · 6 months

Note

For Thalia x Hawke - A steaming mug of something hot, pinned down and mirror sex. If you please <3

All riiiiiight I've resurrected this terribly mediocre ship for one night only!!

For @dadrunkwriting

WC: 2319

Rating: E for the smuts

---

The mug of mulled wine steamed on the table between them. Thalia watched the vapor rise off it as an excuse not to look at him. Hawke had his own mug in front of him, also untouched. The silence between them extended as the Gull and Lantern’s minstrel tuned his lute. His last song, about Scout Lace Harding, had been off key.

Hawke cleared his throat. “So. You got my letter.”

So she had, a couple days earlier. She’d been perfectly baffled by it. Inquisitor, it had read, I really enjoyed having a drink with you the last time we were together. Perhaps you’d like to have a drink again. I’ll be staying in Redcliffe village for the next week, if you’re available.

South Reach was only a day’s ride away on the Imperial Highway, so Thalia had saddled her horse and left Garlic with her sister-in-law that morning. Now at evenfall, Hawke sat before her, looking much the same as he had the last time she’d seen him: still too tall and too muscly, the unkempt beard and hair hiding an otherwise handsome face. She chewed her lip. Getting an answer to her question almost certainly hadn’t been worth the effort to come here.

Thalia picked up the mug and took a sip of the hot wine, sweet with honey and strong with cloves.

“Did we?” she asked. “Have a drink together last time?”

She watched Hawke flush a deep red, almost as vibrant as that strange bit of war paint he always insisted upon smearing across his nose. A forty year old man, playing dress up.

“I don’t seem to recall that part,” Thalia continued.

Hawke cleared his throat, averting his gaze. “Yes, well. I don’t know. Spies could be anywhere. And it sounded less absurd than ‘I fondly think back on the night your mabari bit me.’”

“You think back on that night fondly?” Thalia asked, bemusement only deepening.

Hawke looked at her sharply. “You don’t?”

Thalia frowned, now worried they might have two very different memories of the night in question. “I’d assumed you’d—” She glanced around the tavern, which was full enough that the din drowned out their conversation, but his mention of spies had spooked her. He kept the hood up on his cloak and her prosthetic arm was well-hidden in hers. Her hair was much shorter than it had been when she’d been traipsing through Redcliffe those years ago, long enough that everyday citizens rarely recognized her by sight. Still, the Champion of Kirkwall was technically a wanted man. She had a penchant for those, it seemed. “I’d assumed it was perhaps something you’d wished to forget.”

She had, certainly. A dumb, impulsive thing she still couldn’t quite believe she had done while half-mad with grief. A knot of guilt formed in her ribcage when she thought about it for too long, especially while living in the cottage she’d shared with Cullen.

Hawke leaned back in his seat, his expression difficult to read. She didn’t know him very well — that was the truth. One could read a great man’s biography, and still come away understanding little about him. Varric had told her all about the phenomenon, and the burden of being a chronicler of history. The lies he put in there, to protect his friend. The lies he put into All This Shit Is Weird, to protect her.

“Why on earth would you think that?” Hawke asked, more startled than ever.

Thalia was beginning to regret coming. “You said I reminded you of your sister!”

“Once. When we first met. When you were young and in over your head with all that Inquisition business. Certainly not when we were—”

He broke off for modesty’s sake, but Thalia’s memory filled in the blanks. Fucking on my living room floor, she wanted to supply, but didn’t dare voice the words. She sipped her wine demurely. Hawke’s grip tightened on the edge of the table. He had evidently not expected resistance from her. Which made her wonder what he had expected.

“Anyway,” he cut in again with a twitchy smile. He was less charming than Varric’s book made him out to be, that much she had learned when they’d first met on the battlements of Skyhold. He carried too much pain for that. To be known as a hero, only to have so few of your actions matter. Thalia felt a small bit of pity for him, suddenly. “I just thought it would be nice to see you, that’s all.”

He wants to do it again, Thalia realized, her face flushing hot. He sent the letter on a whim, unsure if she would show up, but show up she did. It was far too late in the evening to turn around and go back to South Reach; she’d be riding all night. So she’d have to stay here and leave in the morning, no matter what. He’d already told her he was staying here, had a room upstairs. The more she thought about it, the less surprised she was.

“Does Varric know about this?” Thalia demanded.

“Why would he know?”

“I don’t know.” She wasn’t sure why the idea made her so queasy.

“Why would he care?” Hawke leaned forward, his bright brown eyes searching her face. “He’s not my father. Nor yours.”

Thalia stared deep into her mug of wine so she wouldn’t have to look at him.

“If anything,” Hawke continued in a musing tone, “I think he’d approve. I think he’d want us to be happy.”

“Oh, being happy, is that you’d call this?” Thalia shot back. “And not just desperately, pathetically lonely?”

For such a large man, Hawke shrank with impressive volume when hurt. His eyes grew distant as he drained his mug in one grimacing gulp. He slammed it down on the table with enough force to rock it, and lurched to his feet. “I see I have been made the fool once more, Lady Inquisitor. Forgive me for thinking you held me in higher esteem than it appears you do.”

Well, now you’ve done it. Regret flooded through her. “Hawke. Hawke, wait.”

He paid no mind, shouldering through the crowd.

Thalia let out a sigh, but resisted the urge to go after him. She nursed the rest of her drink, growing warmer and more morose with each sip. When she finished, the minstrel seemed determined to butcher Andraste’s Mabari, and Thalia stood. She thought about finding the innkeeper and renting her own room for the night, but the thought depressed her even more.

She left the tap room and ventured up the stairs, searching for the room number Hawke had casually dropped at the beginning of their conversation. She found the correct one and knocked before her shame could kick in.

After a few minutes the door opened. Hawke filled it with his massive frame and leaned against it, scowling down at her. His face and ends of his hair were damp; cheeks and nose were pink from where he must have just scrubbed off that ridiculous war paint. He looks better without it, Thalia thought, her stomach flopping.

“Yeah? Can I help you?” His posture and tone were not kind.

“I wanted to apologize,” Thalia said quickly. “I was terribly rude before.”

“You certainly were.” He crossed his arms over his broad chest, biceps straining against the fabric of his tunic sleeve.

She licked her lips. “Can I come in?”

His eyebrows shot upward. “What for?”

Thalia felt herself blushing. She averted his gaze. “I’d rather not stand in a public space and argue with you, that’s all.”

Hawke took a deep breath, held it, let it out slowly. “Right. It’d probably be all over the broadsheets by morning.” He opened the door wider and stepped aside.

She stormed inside, and he closed the door with a firm click, leaning his weight against it. The Gull and Lantern had nice rooms: a wide featherbed with an embroidered cover dominated the room, and the stone walls were covered with oil paintings of the Ferelden elite. A full length mirror with a gilded frame stood in one corner, in front of which stood Hawke’s pack and belongings. But she didn’t come here to gawk at the decor.

She turned to face him. Hawke stood before her, his expression stony. “Well? Have you come to keep throwing my feelings in my face, or do you wish to beg for forgiveness?”

Thalia swallowed thickly, her gaze straying to the bed. “Are those the only two options?”

---

“As I was trying to say,” Thalia said, straddling his naked waist, “it’s just that I don’t know you very well.”

Hawke’s hands gripped her hips as he helped her line up with his erection. He chuckled. “And you don’t think this counts as getting to know each other?”

“I don’t know what this counts as.” She inhaled as they pressed against each other. It was both a relief and terribly annoying to feel him inside her again. She wriggled for purchase — he was sitting at the side of the bed, her in his lap, kneeling on either side of him — and let out a sigh. “Maker. Okay.”

“Just okay?” He rolled his hips against hers and leaned in for a kiss. “I’d like it to be a little better than that.”

Thalia pressed her hand against his chest and closed her eyes, trying to focus on the feel of him. “It’s just— last time, ah—” She matched his slow rhythm and felt a nice little ache spreading from her pelvis. “It took us awhile.”

“And that’s why you’re on top this time, yes?” He nipped at her ear. “I can be a quick study.”

“Be that as it may,” Thalia said, breath growing shallow, “This isn’t normally something I do, you understand.”

“And what is ‘this’?”

“Sex.” Thalia gasped as he grabbed her breasts and squeezed. “With near strangers!”

“I wouldn’t say we’re that. We saved the world together, remember?”

“Mm. I suppose.” His chest was warm and sculpted, beneath the thick hair that covered it. She ran her palm along its contours. She had always found the largeness of his body comforting.

“Survived the Fade, side by side.” Another slow, purposeful thrust, as he stroked her nipples with his thumbs. This drew a little cry from her; he grunted in appreciation. “I admired your tenacity then.”

“You didn’t say anything.” She tested out how it felt to slowly raise herself up and down on her knees, feeling the length of him. Good. Pretty good. She shuddered pleasantly.

“You were busy. And young. Fuck, yes, just like that.”

“I’m still young,” Thalia reminded him, the thrill of the encouragement mixing with her ire. Cullen had never sworn when they made love.

“Younger than now. And I was full of bitterness, grievances.” He adjusted her, tried a different angle. Better, she thought. Maker, I think I’m enjoying this.

“Well, what a coincidence—” She gasped, grinding against him. “Now I’ve got those too.”

“So it works?”

“Maybe.” She was growing impatient. She shifted, and with better leverage, began to bounce harder and faster, abandoning pretense, her breaths coming in short gasps.

“Bloody hell—” Hawke yelped. He leaned back, groaning. He fell flat on the bed, and Thalia gleefully straddled his waist and rode him, her breasts heaving. He cursed and muttered her name and pawed at her. “Fuck,” she said back, trying it out. Crude, but she liked it, if she allowed herself to, this messy copulation with a man she barely knew. She thought maybe she could bring them both to climax like this, call the deed done, but she slowed before they reached the tipping point, her knees betraying her. She sat back a little, her one good hand splayed on his panting stomach, hair obscuring her face, and tried to catch her breath.

“You’re real gaatlok when you get going, you know that?” Hawke demanded.

Thalia bit her lip. “Thanks. I think.” She felt strangely shy all of a sudden, which was absurd because he was cupping her breasts and moving slowly inside her to get her going again. “Do you think — we can get there together this time?”

Hawke smirked. She didn’t see him smile much, and she had to admit the softening of his face made him more attractive. “We’re the Inquisitor and the Champion of Kirkwall. I believe in us.”

“I don’t think our previous accomplishments qualify us for this task.”

“Not with that attitude.”

She laughed, genuinely surprised at his humor. Garrett Hawke had always seemed so dour to her, preoccupied with the world and all its failings. Her laughter died, however, when he reached between her legs and found a certain spot with his thumb he had massaged last time on her living room floor. She gasped. “Oh, Maker….”

“Why don’t we try it?” he asked, putting some pressure there. Thalia bucked against him, causing them both to moan.

“That isn’t fair,” Thalia whined, meeting his crescendoing pace, feeling herself losing more and more control.

“Why? You think you’re the only one who can drive someone wild?”

Words were lost after that, lost to panting and grunting and epithets hissed through teeth. “Hawke,” she said, like an accusation; because that felt impersonal, she tried, “Garrett.” He returned the favor, saying her name fervently, like a prayer.

Just as she felt herself about to slip over, she arched her back and threw her head back into the feeling. It was then she caught a full reflect of herself curled around him in the full length mirror. “Sweet Andraste!” she cried in horror.

Hawke angled his head, amused. “So that’s what we look like.”

“I can’t believe I didn’t notice before. How unseemly.”

“You don’t think we look thrilling?”

“Certainly not!”

“Keep looking,” Hawke urged, and Thalia, too absorbed to disengage, obliged.

She begrudgingly admitted it had a certain appeal, after.

#trevelyan x hawke #thalia trevelyan #garrett hawke #dragon age drunk writing circle #fics

8 notes · View notes

siriusly-sapphic · 11 months

Note

Siricissa: 2, 4, 11, 14, 19, 28. I did very much struggle with not just asking you to answer all of them

Send me ship asks!

Oh my god so many Caitie I love you

2: Do they have a dynamic trope? (enemies to lovers, sunshine x grumpy, etc?)

As complicated and messy as they are, yeah for sure there are some tropes they fall into. They're both Friends to Lovers and also Lovers to Enemies, but also Enemies with Benefits. They also perfectly go with the whole bad boy/good girl thing, and I love that for them.

4: What’s their favorite sleeping/cuddling positions?

It's kind of rare for them to be in a situation, generally, where they can fall asleep together and it's not just one of them leaving in the middle of night after they've had sex. But when it happens, or in happier AUs where they're actually more officially together, they are definitely that couple that falls asleep all entwined. They both live with this idea that this is temporary even if it feels all-consuming, so they're quite attached to each other in every way? She falls asleep with her head on his chest (judging his tattoos but being comforted by the sight of them), he holds her and he cusses at her because her hair gets everywhere. When they wake up, they're close enough to fuck again just about immediately. Win win.

11: What’s a song that describes their relationship? Or, what’s the song that they’ve deemed “their” song?

There are so many that describe them it's hard to choose damn. I'm gonna give you two.

I Bet My Life by Imagine Dragons

I know I took the path that you would never want for me I know I let you down, didn't I? Now remember when I told you that's the last you'll see of me Remember when I broke you down to tears I know I took the path that you would never want for me I gave you hell through all the years I've told a million lies but now I tell a single truth There's you in everything I do I bet my life on you

Why Do You Love Me by Charlotte Lawrence

Hate your friends I hate your mom and dad I hope they hate me back I guess for once, I'm being honest Got to be a lot that's wrong with you To want to be with me It's kind of sweet Apologize, never apologize You hate the way I lie So here you go, I'm being honest Narcissist, come on, give us a kiss Let's have some fun with it

14: Who does fashion shows after a mall trip and who watches and compliments them?

Both. They are dramatic and fashionable and they love it and they love encouraging it in each other (with a healthy or unhealthy dose of mockery). They also go shopping together and do fashion show offs in the changing rooms, and end up having a quickie in one of them. Bless silencing charms.

19: How do they silently/subtly express their love for each other?

Narcissa has a thing about subtly Fixing things about the people she loves, like fixing their sleeves or their hair or readjusting their collar or tie, stuff like that. Small things that show she is watching, noticing, and caring about you. He always tells her off because he likes looking like he doesn't care about his appearance (even though he cares and everyone knows it), but he notices when she's mad at him and stops doing it and it always hurts a bit.

I think a big show of quietly saying how much they love each other and care for each other, is how they treat each other after a big fight. Their fights get nasty and explosive and they get hurt, they bleed, they scar, they know what to say to emotionally fuck each other up. When the fight's over, Sirius takes his wand and Narcissa doesn't flinch because she knows he's going to stop the cut on her cheek from scarring, and she recognises the hatred and the fear in his eyes from when she told him he's just like his mother and she reassures him that he's nothing like her (even though she thinks it's a lie).

28: What’s something that reminds them of their partner(s)? Do they have anything on them daily as a reminder (a photo, phone background, tattoo, clothing/accessory, etc)?

Okay so nothing too obvious, they try not to because yknow it'd be a whole Thing if someone found out. She's not walking around with his picture in her locket. But I do ofc like the idea of him getting a daffodil tattoo, and he gets it because it'll piss her off and she'll love and hate it, and it's not a connection that most people would immediately make. He has a bunch of other tattoos, so a small flower doesn't get noticed much. Narcissa has a Black family heirloom in the form of a ring or a necklace or something, which no one would think more of than being from her family, but holds significance to her because it's something Sirius nicked from his mother's collection when Narcissa transitioned so he could give it to her.

They also carry a lot of scars on their bodies that are leftovers from nasty fights and rough sex. There are ones that Sirius wears proudly and people tend to assume they're just from the war or from other partners, and ones that Narcissa glamours to hide. Lucius occasionally kisses her skin where she knows she has a scar from Sirius, and he has no idea but she loves it.

#sirius black #narcissa malfoy #marauders era #siricissa #sirius x narcissa #blackcest #headcanons #answered asks #caitiespersonalhell

6 notes · View notes

g-on-ef · 1 year

Text

People like Me break Beautiful things

☾~☆~❀~☆~☽

A/N: Hello beautiful people ^^ I'm back with a new story !!! This something that I've been dying to write since I read @ladyanaconda fic, guys if you can go give her stories/art a like she deserves all the love and praise in the world !!! Anywhore this idea has been brewing in my in my head for quiet some time now ^^ basically this is an Octavia x OC story with Blitzo x Striker as well so if you don't ship Blitzo x Striker than kindly leave oh and if you love stolas also leave he's not gonna be portray in a good light at all. But anywhore be prepared for a story of love angst heartache betrayal and Striker being a bad ass ^^ now enough of my babbling on with the show ^^

Summary: Sometimes when I'm alone I Cry, Cause I am on my own. The tears I cry are bitter and warm. They flow with life but take no form I Cry because my heart is torn. I find it difficult to carry on. If I had an ear to confiding, I would cry among my treasured friend, but who do you know that stops that long, to help another carry on. The world moves fast and it would rather pass by. Then to stop and see what makes one cry, so painful and sad. And sometimes… I Cry and no one cares about why.- Tupac

Octavia never thought she would know betrayal like many of her fellow royals did, she never thought that the one she gave her heart to would be the one to crush it.

She never thought that her best friend the love of her life would be the son of the man trying to murder her father...

☾~☆~❀~☆~☽

Chapter 1: Grey

She lied, she lied to them all when she said it was okay that her dad broke their promise and she lied when she said it was okay cause he was there.

If she was honest she wanted to laugh at the hellhound when she was telling her all that bullshit about dads trying their best hell how was she supposed to take that girls word seriously when she kicked her father in the balls?

If that speech came from someone else than maybe Via would have a better chance of believing it but coming from the hellhound and felt more like bullshit.

Octavia stared at the ceiling of her room, they came home and the first thing her dad did was grab the homewrecker and took him to his room.

Never in her life has she been grateful that her room was soundproof.

Taking a deep breath Via was about to go to sleep when her phone vibrated. She turned her head and picked it up.

It was a message...from him.

A smile a real smile bloomed across her face as she opened the app.

Come to the window

Confused Octavia did what the message said. Opening her window she almost squeal in delight at the person on her balcony.

Instead she ran to open arms that encircled around her and pulled her closer to a strong chest.

The smell of the desert mixed with leather and smoke filled her nose a smell that reminded her of home. Her real home.

"What are you doing here,"

The sound of rattling filled her ears, letting her know he was happy to see her as much as she was him.

"It's simple princessa I'm here to take you to see the stars,"

"What?"

She pulled away, she was a head taller than him and she wonder aside from being an imp what else he was mixed with because from his height was a head taller than the homewrecker and average imp.

"Yeah, you always talked about wanting to see the stars in Wrath and figured since your ma isn't here and your dad is busy doing Satan knows what with Satan knows who it'll be the perfect time to go visit Wrath."

Octavia looked at him and smiled.

"Sure let's-"

"OH my BLITZY"!

Octavia and the other looked up to see Stolas' head and watched as his body moved.

"The fuck?"

Octavia on the other hand.

"Let's go," she grabbed his hand and dragged him out the castle to the outside where his motorcycle was.

She grabbed the spear helmet and waited till he sat down.

"Do I wanna know," he asked as he started the bike"

He turned to face her.

"And I don't just mean your dad getting fucked by the 'homewrecker'"

She shook her head.

"No, just please Grey, please let's get out of here,"

The imp known as Grey felt his smile drop at the look of hurt and sadness on her. His heart hurt at seeing her like this and kept his growl as well as thoughts to himself, she needed comfort not a lecture and he will gladly take her anywhere so that she will never feel hurt again.

"Alright Princesa, let's get you out of here,"

He started the bike and took her far, far away from her home which was slowly becoming her own personal hell.

☾~☆~❀~☆~☽

A/N: good ??? Bad ??? Tell me what you guys think ^^

#helluva boss #helluva boss striker #helluva oc #helluva octavia #octavia x oc #helluva boss fanfiction #my writing #new fic #people like me break beautiful things

6 notes · View notes

roselise · 1 year

Note

birth of venue, the scream, guernica ♡⁠

Oh!

My wonderful friend !!! ♡

[hugs!<333]

This brightens my day so much . . . I’m always so very happy to see you!! :D

Thank you for giving me something to smile about today. ♡ ♡

Hmm okay, let’s see!

♡ birth of venus: do you have a favorite myth? if so, what is it?

I had to think on this, but I think maybe the sacrifice of Iphigenia. c:

In greek mythology, Iphigenia was the daughter of King Agamemnon and Queen Clytemnestra!

Agamemnon offends the Goddess Artemis by killing a sacred deer, so she stops all winds, and his ships are not be able to sail. To appease her, he is commanded to kill Princess Iphigenia as a sacrifice so that his ships can set sail to Troy!

He lies and tells her that she is to marry Achillles before they leave. When she arrives at the port of Aulis, however, she finds out the truth. Achilles tries to prevent the sacrifice, but Iphigenia still decides to sacrifice herself anyway!

In some versions, she is sacrificed at Aulis, but in others Artemis substitutes Iphigenia for a deer and rescues her. Princess Iphigenia is then brought by the goddess to the city of Tauris where she becomes Artemis' priestess.

I think this always appealed to me, because Iphigenia ultimately decides to sacrifice herself on her own.

Her choice is a selfless one made for others. Despite how sad and afraid she was, she still wanted to do the right thing.

It’s very inspiring!

I hope that if I ever need to, that I can be that selfless someday, too. c:

♡ the scream: do you have an unusual fear?

Well, I’m not sure if it’s unusual, but I have a recurring nightmare of being left alone!

I’m not sure why, but it always really unsettles me being all by myself in a scary situation.

I am easily frightened though, so perhaps it is a subconscious fear of being afraid, and having nowhere to go?

I do not enjoy these dreams at all!! ;-;

♡ guernica: tell a story - any story you like

Once when I was small, my sister and I were playing a game where we’d race each other to a tree in our yard, and then come back.

After a few turns, I kept running past the tree . . . and did not run back.

I ended up running really far from my house! I was fast!!

When did I plan to stop? Where was I going?

I have no idea honestly!

I was eventually found by my dad, but to this day it’s a mystery as to why I suddenly broke off, and ran away like that. :’)

Thank you again, my friend!! ♡

This was so nice, and it cheered me so much to see you today! So I am hoping that something might brighten and cheer you today, too, and that your day will be full of happy things! :D

Sending many warm hugs, and kind thoughts! Take care ~ ! xoxo

♡ ⋆ 🎀 ﾟ⊹ ｡.:*✧ ✿ 🧁 💗

#<3 #ask #reis !!!!!#:D #happiness is seeing my friend c:#i am so grateful and full of joy now c:#thank you for your wonderful presence and always being so kind to me !#you’re a treasure and i am so happy to know you !#so i hope that you have a truly amazing day filled with lots of wonderful things ! c:#sending hugs and much happiness !#i wish you much love and joy today ! <3 #♡ ⋆ﾟ⊹ ˳ ׂ ｡ 🤍

4 notes · View notes

blondrichclosetwitch · 2 years

Text

Friends are so alarming, and my lover's never charming

Laughter, joy, and loneliness and sex and sex and sex and sex

And look at me, I'm in tatters

I'm shattered

The time has come, the time has come, the time has

come today

And spoil all the fun, won’t you please

Oh ok, if you insist

He loved guns and roses, roses, roses (I bought PJ so many roses)

Somethin' has made these kids get scary

Oh, writin' in blood on my walls and shit (have i mentioned they smeared blood on my walls and curtains, but then came back and tried to remove it from the wall)

Don't know what it is, it makes my head get crazy

Oh, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't sick of it

Nothing’s gonna hit you like the truth

You’re just following orders, closin your eyes and telling lies while they’re taking our daughters

Did you really think this bloody road would pave the way for you?

Man, it sounds just like a prison for the walking dead

I’ve got a message for you and your twisted hell: you’re gonna wish you never messed with me.

Mama mama many worlds I’ve come since I first left home

Going to leave this broke-down palace

Well here comes Lucifer with her canon law

You were my partner in crime, it was a welcome waste of time

Awaken perfect state

The time has come, the time has come, the time has come today(yes, that’s two different lists)

And everytime I prayed I prayed for you

Welcome to the Big 10 Conference

Oh look the song they like to play before I get a concussion

A parrot on your shoulder saying everything when you talk (have we talked about anytime I say anything, there is something that repeats what I would say next before I even think it—-it’s some type of conditioned response from having my mind fucked with)

“The things you’ve said well maybe they’re true. “

You drive me out of my mind

And all I really want is some justice

By the time you wake, it'll be too late

Now the bullet's left the gun

Missed the time, so we’re using 15:09 which kinda gives it a double entendre as the French say

Spy, spy, pretty girl. I keep havin' this brainstorm about 12 times a day. There are children in washrooms holding hands with a Queen. And my head’s full of murders.

So now, you should spend the morning, lying to your father.

We clung on like barnacles on a boat

Even though the ship sinks, you know you can’t let go

And if they stare

Just let them burn their eyes on you moving

And if they shout

Don't let it change a thing that you're doing

So, enchanted at 4:06/4:09—-I still have a migraine so I’m a bit out of it, but yes we were enchanted to meet, and I’m not sure why exactly I kept seeing maggie during the song when I closed my eyes, but I sure did.

My best friend told me you're the best lick in town

You almost turned me psycho

I almost lost my mind

I didn't know the depth yet of someone so unkind

But for her it's just another day

You opened up Pandora's box

You don't know what you just unlocked

Gotta get a message, get it on through

Oh now, mamma don't you ask me why

Woh-ho-ho, listen to the music

All the thoughts unuttered and all the feelings unexpressed

Play upon our hearts like the mist upon our breath

But awoke by grief, our spirits speak

Love is stronger than death

All I know is I’m fallin fallin fallin

#today is a 15/6

3 notes · View notes

rockinlibrarian · 7 months

Note

Very late with the happy-fic-writer game, but: 7 and 12!

HEyyyyy! I'm always up for an ask or two! This refers to this one, here, posted a week ago, which isn't THAT long ago so join in!

7. What do you love most about being a fic writer for your fandom?

As I said here (and answered the question in a slightly different way), I'm a multi-fandom writer-- which @steeple-sinderby has first-hand experience with, being that she's gamely beta'd everything from "our shared fandom but not my ship" fics to "I know absolutely nothing about the source material of this fic-that-is-nothing-but-inside-jokes-about-the-source-material" fics (oh, I think there was ONE CHAPTER of an actual "gen fic in our shared fandom"! Amazing!) (also have to throw in the "absurd RPF of several fandoms I know vaguely enough" because that took guts, too!)

And anyway, I like being multi-fandom, because I can take pretty much any idea and start to run with it. That makes for lots and lots of fics started that MAY never get completed (never say never!)! In the past week I have started three different fics in three different fandoms, only one of which I've ever written in before and that with different characters, too, and one of which probably isn't even properly a "fandom" but a work that just makes a good writing prompt. One is just pure crack I started when we finished reading a book and @sunnymarbles said "But I want to know about [insert throwaway detail that's-not-even-a-plot-point]!" and I said "That's what fanfic is for!" and I did a search on AO3 and while there were indeed several fics for the book series itself, nobody HAD explored throwaway-detail-that's-not-even-a-plot-point, so I felt compelled to do it myself. I have one paragraph, and a vague idea for a bit more plot, and if WHEN I ever finish it I'll be sure to share it!* Probably no knowledge of canon needed, because it's crack. At least compared to what other people have posted in the fandom.

*@sunnymarbles, I've been meaning to share it with you long before that, so you can help me brainstorm, but it's been a busy week. Ask me when you get home.

No I lied, it's short, here is the entirety of what I have written for this:

The moose of the Green Mountains knew to avoid the place they called the Unstable Slope, or “oooOOOOOOoooo” in their native tongue. Ninety generations had passed since the first BoomQuakes broke the mountain, and still young moose were warned away, despite tales of a mythical lake that appeared suddenly there for several years, only to just as suddenly dry up again.

(If you can name the source material from that, you get a point! It's a YA mystery series. Those are your hints).

Anyway, let's move on.

12. What is your favorite theme/subject matter/trope/ship to write about? Why?

How They Became Friends. This occasionally branches off into "How They Fell In Love" or "How One of Them Learned The Other's Secret(s)" or "How They Got Into THAT Mess," but it all stems from How They Became Friends, which is the theme/trope I've been writing on since I pretty much started writing at the age of seven. I guess it was a kind of fantasy-self-insert writing that happened to be original fiction instead of fic, because I was a really lonely kid, and I'd noted that when people were forced into An Adventure together, it brought them closer. Because, you know, it skipped over all that boring Small Talk and Faking Interest In the Latest Fad that real life friend-making seemed to require. So it was that every story I wrote for the first few years of my life involved Me and Some People I Knew In Real Life stumbling into an Adventure (usually involving fantasy elements because I needed all the non-mundane help I could get).

It stuck, even when I started actually making real friends without the aid of portals to other dimensions. It's a theme that lends itself to fanfic naturally, because media is FULL of established relationships to wonder about the beginnings of, and you don't necessarily have to worry too much about plot when you write fanfic. It can BE simply 800 words of "This is How They Became Friends" with bonus time travel complications.

This probably loops back to why I'm a multi-fandom writer, because there's only so many times you can introduce the characters to each other per fandom. I say while a full 10 of my 19 posted Legion fics manage to fall under this theme umbrella, and those only really covering the friendships of four of the many characters. Yay multiple timelines!

#ask game #writing #fanfic

1 note · View note

blarghsandblurbs · 2 years

Text

I feel

Like somewhere inside

Your words are melting my heart

“I’ve loved your name

Your voice

Deep with hints of Smokey gravel”

15 years ago

I should have whisked you away

How can you tell a fairytale

To a heart that has shattered

Every dream I had

You uttered

Long after they have scattered

Like marbles and fallen stars across the floor

I can feel the dry tears dripping

Threats of murder and suicide and violence echo in the front of my mind

Reality crashes

And I wonder why

All I need now is freedom

Your alluring promises I can’t trust

I so badly want to grab them and hold them

“I feel… supported”

Your words are reverent

How many days has it been since I’ve eaten

I dare to dream of love?

You’re unraveling

“Girl you know me

My precious friend

You stood up for me

When you were broken”

“You defended me

You matter

You told the truth

And understood me

How can I not listen to you?”

All your kind words are making me come unglued

Can’t someone hear the heaving sobs

Underneath my quivering smile, faltering

I’m grieving in the darken corners of my heart

Your chipping away the stone

You were already underneath my defenses long ago

Decades ago

I couldn’t shield myself from you

You quietly watched my sinking ship

For years

Waiting for me

To speak

How

How did you wait this long for me to say something

About my pitiful suffering

How many people waited for me

Patiently

For years

How blessed was I

With the love

So cherished

Like wrapped up in angel feathers

I’m so

Disgusted

Knowing how badly I wanted to die

Isolating myself inside my own hell

What a gift I was always given

How precious and delicate

Tears burn the back of my eyes

I always knew fighting for someone mattered

How deeply it meant

“I feel secure in what I mean to others “

The tears are falling

I did that for you?

Another piece of armor has fallen

I’m so weary

I’m so tired

When I thought I’d disappear like the wind

Another one catches my hand

The universe has a funny way of catching me

Please put me down softly love

On the clouds

Let me sleep safely in your arms

For once in my life

Where I’m not dying

Wishing someone would catch me

For once I’ve given up on someone saving me

And I was certain I’d do it myself

Doing it alone is such an uphill battle

When I finally caved in to surrendering the desperation

And gave in to the inevitable

Warmth like a piercing ray of light

Please

The saddest thing I ever felt

Was that hope was a fools pursuit

It’s such a fragile thing that we need to keep on dreaming

To lose all of it

Was like a dry desert with no meaning

Realizing there’s no oasis

And succumbing to the heat

You fall to your knees, lie down and cease breathing

How is this living?

I’m happy my rage broke through your false realities

Maybe your best was me

Live in your fragile lies

I haven’t eaten in two days

Something in me finally died

I can only stare at things

Silence fills up my days

I don’t want to speak

But you drag it out of me

My voice, my passions my reasons and my meaning

All spilled across paper

As the ink barely dries

My head hurts

I’m so hungry and I can’t nourish me

I’d like it all up

I want to walk forever into the sun

I want to lay on the cement and scream at the world “you won”

Why is being loved so painful

Why is it so beautiful

Proof my heart beats

I’m alive

I’m breathing

What is next, the words poured from my soul

Help me find reason

To keep on being

9/1

0 notes

owlhousefansblog · 2 years

Text

so this happens in one of addison's return to earth they all went to college and addison had come that day to visit zed at college but when she saw him she saw him talking to a girl who later kissed and left. Then he saw Addison and froze.

A-Addison you're in town...good to see you!

Cut Zed! *Addison screams and leaves with Zed following*

Addison! Wait, I know I had to tell you, but...

do you swear you love me forever remember? i love you forever

I know but it happened Addison please *offers to take her hand but Addison electrocutes him*

don't you dare talk to me again Zed *Addison leaves there nervous and sad*

Addison had gone to her house, her parents had welcomed her and given her an unforgettable afternoon, but nothing could keep her from thinking about Zed and that girl.

Mother ship pick me up *she said waving to her parents*

She saw you DO WHAT?! I warned you it wasn't going to end well Zed *said Eliza from her talking robot*

I know I just needed time to explain to her

time? YOU HAVE TIME but you waited for THE RIGHT MOMENT, I'm out you do it with your hand *said Eliza and the camera closed*

A-Spen : Mother ship I think Addison is sick *A-Spen had said *

no, she broke up with Zed *said A-Lan*

FINALLY! *A-Li said*

A-Spen and A-Lan had glared at A-Li

what the? didn't we all think that?

your mind is a dark place* said A-Lan*

I know right?

to GET to talk to her? *asks A-Spen*

DO NOT DISTURB ADDISON *mother ship screams*

the next day Addison had gone for a walk through Seebrook, maybe he could still calm his agitated mind, but everywhere he looked he seemed to see that girl and Zed holding hands, so he decided to walk in a place less traveled by world where the Forbidden Forest could even relax

If she was still in the area she had thought of visiting the werewolves as it was her weekend she should have been at the den. While she was walking she heard some leaves rustling, she got scared and when she went forward she felt someone behind her. She turns quickly and in the sunlight she sees a familiar face before she snaps him he grabs both her hands in time.

Wyatt! I'm so happy to see you! *she hugs him*

Addison! I didn't expect to see you here* hug back* you mess us didn't you? *he said with a grin and let her go*

sure! "I missed my favorite coat," Addison said with a smile

hey are you ok you look like you've been crying all night, you look terrible *Wyett said looking at her worriedly*

it's nothing...just...

come on, sit down and tell me what's happened *said Wyatt*

Well ..I went yesterday to see how he was doing and I was really excited to see him, you know? Sigh..*Addison's eyes start to tear up*

what? what did you see?

why was he holding her hands when he supposed to be mine?

I'm really sorry Addison ,tell me what to do to make fell better?

maybe it's a cruel joke on me...

WELL THAT'S NOT FAIR! you have to pay her back, you can't just accept this! and I'm going to help you, we all are

Thank you ...but *Addison lets out a smile* I was so preoccupied with my problem with Zed that I forgot to ask you about yours, did you and Eliza go on a date?

Well...we tried to go out but...it just wasn't meant to be I think...just like it wasn't meant to be with you and Zed. It's...hard to have a long-distance relationship, don't get me wrong, I'm still into it, but it seems we have different goals, so...now we're just friends.

I'm so sorry Wyatt *said Addison and took him in her arms*

well now I think we can suffer together huh? *said Wyatt with a sad smile and took her in his arms* come on now , we have to tell the den people too they can help us with a plan or something

Wyatt said leading her to the den.

Addison! *shouts Wynter and then gives a shout of joy*

you're back* Willa said with a smile and completely calm*

Hey guys I'm happy to see you too* said Addison welcoming them with a warm smile*

Guys we have a problem *said Wyatt completely seriously*

It's not so inp-

ZED BROKE ADDISON'S HEART *everyone went silent*

WHAT?! *wynter wonders*

how could he *said Willa upset* we have to take revenge something so bad that it breaks his heart so hard that he SCREAMS IN PAIN!

YES! *all shouted*

No, It's not right...I mean..I'm not like this...*Addison said*

he is the bad guy here, not us, you deserve better and he deserves a lesson *said Willa*

Addison thought for a moment after asking

What's the plan?

*everyone exclaims happily and Willa has a grin on her face*

I know the perfect person to help us *said Willa still grinning*

So we need to make him jealous and mad, if he is jealous this will prove that he still has feelings for Addison and if not Addison you need to move on *said Eliza* Bonzo and Bree will help you from the inside like Willa and Wynter . Do you understand the plan?

Idk what to say are you sure? you ok with this? *asks Addison expecting a negative answer from Eliza*

Yeah! ofc don't worry all it's fake so why would I worry?

Idk it's a little bit weird, we are just good friends *said Wyatt*

don't worry you too it's going to be fine *said Eliza* just stick to the plan *said Eliza and hangs up*

well..I think I need to go too, aliens are waiting for me, they said they want to tell me more about their traditions, so I really have to go.

It's a bit late, do you want us to lead you out of the forest? *willa asks*

no need, thank you

Addison get out from the cave and shouts

Mother ship pick me up please

*a white light starts to surround her* bye guys see you tomorrow! *shouts and disappeared*the weekend goes by quickly for Addison spending the vast majority of her time with her friends and family, even werewolves offered to give her a new werewolf and alien style.

She had come on Monday and was ready to go to the college she had long dreamed of with her friends. It was lunch and while she was walking towards the table where Bonzo, Bree Willa and Wynter Addisom were, she caught sight of Zed and his new girlfriend who were coming towards her, she had tried to leave but it was too late they had already reached her.

Hi Addoson...*said Zed a little embarrassed by the situation*

h-hey Zed-*just then out of nowhere Wyatt appears next to her*

Hi Addison guess what! *Wyatt said excitedly*

what?

I entered! now we can both play for the cheerleaders like in the old days, with you as captain of course *he smiled innocently*

really? this is very good news! *Addison said with a childish smile on her face*

*Zed coughs*

sorry, were you saying something Zed mate? *said Wyatt with a grin*

no, nothing come on Vanessa *said Zed visibly disturbed*

nice to meet you guys *said Vanessa passing by them*

Wyatt and Addison headed to their friends' table.

How stupid, to come with his new girlfriend to Addison but luckily Wyatt showed up just in time *said Willa*

but did you see his face? he looks like he wants to start a fight 😂 *said Bree*

but what you said was true? did they really accept us? i thought the results were coming out tonight for this morning's tests*addison said confused*

every word*smile Wyatt*

omg we really did it! *addison gets excited*

I know right? *Wyatt also said excited in his turn*

working in the cheerleading squad, they were together all the time, a strong friendship had really grown between them, but Zed didn't seem too keen on the idea and their plan was working perfectly.

SHE REPLACED ME WITH WYATT CAN YOU BELIEVE?! *Zed said angrily walking along with robot Elizey*

what the? you are jealous? *Eliza smiles*

what the? NO OFC "NO"?! Why would you think that? *Zed said turning his head to see Eliza's grin*I'm very happy with Va-*they walked into a hallway where they saw Addison and Wyatt standing extremely close, Zed just froze when he saw that Wyatt he lifted Addison's face with a hand a little longer maintaining that killer eye contact

Like I said I'm happy with Vanessa and she seems the same..Zed just walks out of there angry and sad at the same time. Eliza simply left too, and the weed had gone too far.

Addison and Wyatt stayed like this for a while until Addison returned and they broke up.

(What really happened)

Wyatt had come to Addison to ask for an assignment, but he had come behind the closet door and when he closed the closet, Addison freaked out when he saw the cards fall, he tried to give him one, Addison slipped the cards. and he fell and Wyatt gave him a helping hand to get up. When he helped Addison up, yes they were standing close but not quite but then they heard Zed so they decided to improvise.

What was with that hand Wyatt? *asks Addison suspiciously*

You still had some jam on your face from the donut you ate half an hour ago, so you're welcome *said Wyatt*

we have to go we're late for our class *Addison said pulling Wyatt after her*

1 note · View note

ask-these-fantrolls · 4 years

Text

[Hm! Some negativity and a response to Things under the cut!

Last night I found out that a guy- known for having come into my DMs to yell at me about an issue happening outside of my server and that I didn't know about, talking back to moderators, systemfaking (according to many people who shared a different server with him), drawing dubcon of my character without my consent, forcing ships on me and as I just found out almost everyone else I know who interacted with him (going so far as to extort others with adoptables to be able to ship with them), and making me scared to even sound slightly abrasive with him for fear of him having one of his aggressive outbursts- tried to turn one of my friends (maybe more, I have no idea) against me by creating a literally crooked and obviously fake screenshot that made it look like I called him the f and r slurs before kicking him out of my server!

I of course never called him these things (and if anyone he showed this screenshot to wants to see real screenshots of our entire text conversation on discord I would be More than happy to share it) and I also have a screenshot from the server's audit log showing him leaving the server all on his own.

I'd love to let him know that while he has his screenshot he created for who fucking knows what petty little man child reasons (considering the worst thing i ever said to him was "do better next time" when he admitted to me that he knew he was being an asshole), I have real screenshots from myself and multiple artists whom he asked to straight up steal character designs (from both big media and from other people in the community) and who told him they could take inspiration, but would not steal. I have real screenshots from when he attacked me in DMs over issues I had no idea about because they happened in Other People's DMs and his attack was literally the first i heard of it. I have screenshots of the dubcon he drew of my character. I have screenshots of him talking back to a mod when he was warned about his character being over powered and making the role play environment hostile for many others in the server.

I'm not sure if he showed anyone past the first person who kindly informed him he was talking out his ass, and i'm not sure if he's been showing this to other people on tumblr to try and dirty my name. In the end, however, I don't care what fake and crooked screenshots you've made about me that everyone who sees knows is fake and out of character, because I have enough real evidence that people who experienced the same bullshit at your hand will happily corroborate to combat your nonsense.

I am not a drama blog, I will not leak the name unless he tries to pull something first, and I'm not going to go dwelling on him as I'd already moved past dealing with that man months ago after he left my server. But don't misunderstand me, I will leak every abundant bit of dirty and disgusting and questionable information I saw this man spew and every screenshot and information I have been given by the many people he has slighted in just my small social circle alone IF he tries anything with his fake little screenie or any similar tomfuckery.

If you try to lie about me, I will not hesitate to tell the truth about you. End of story, I'm done with this topic now.]

#ooc #negative #we are both grown ass men #don't act like a petty teenager in a hallmark anti-bullying film.#I bloced you on everything because you were cruel to me but evidently if anyone dares to dislike you you go for the throat #like you did when you lied about why my friend broke your ship up #with the REAL reason being that you were acting like a manipulative POS and they said multiple times ''my character would leave him over #something like this'' and you not taking their boundaries seriously #while the reason you trie passing off but stopped when nobody believed you was ''THEY were the bad one annd wanted to LEAVE me because #of my mental health!''#You being cruel nasty and abhorrent to people is why they break your ships off- not your mental health. Don't pull that nonsense on people #important

1 note · View note

peteyprecious616 · 2 years

Text

Welcome to my Masterlist!

This a multi-fandom page for Marvel, DC, Star Wars and many others which I can't wait to write more for.

Requests: open

Most recent work: Then there were two

🔮 Druig 🔮

Admiring from afar

summary: you sneak a peek at Druig's secret training session. But you're not very secretive.

Waiting for gold

Summary: You understood him, or so you thought. But he left, and he was the only person you cared for. Now he's on his own, loving his village, but why couldn't he love you too?

Forever yours

Summary: He loves you, and you love him. You couldn't live forever, but he could love you endlessly.

Just out of reach

Summary: He was leaving you again for some time, but you will never be truly alone.

🕷️ Peter Parker 🕷️

A Wilted Flower

Summary: Peter gave up after MJ broke his heart. His big heart now wilting away as he silently waits for her to come back. You know she won’t. So you sit by him as he waits, picking up the pieces in the process.

As the years go by

Summary: He was in love with you, his best friend and over the years that love grew. But so did you. Did he really think that he would be your number one thought forever?

A warm embrace

Summary: A cold winter day staring off brutal for you, only to meet a sweet stranger with a warm heart.

⍟ Steve Rogers ⍟

Steve vs. Soup

Summary: what are the qualifications to consider soup...soup? I mean you obviously know. But does Steve know? He thinks so.

You’ve got mail

Summary: You moved to a small town, loving your new lifestyle and making new friends. You make a new friend, Steve, your local mailman. A small friendship ensues.

🦊 Eros (Starfox) 🦊

All on your own

Summary: The God of Love just hopped on your ship and he already has you wrapped around his finger. You think you’re in love, but maybe he just likes to use his powers on you.

४ Loki Laufeyson ४

A touch of magic

Summary: Your precious flower just doesn't want to bloom. And Loki just wants to see his precious darling flower, you, to always be happy and blossoming.

✪ Bucky Barnes ✪

Written in the lines

Summary: Bucky starts to take up a new hobby...drawing. He thinks his drawing is not good enough for you to see. But you think it's beautiful.

Silent promises

What is comfort to Bucky? It was a small, lingering question throughout everyone's mind, even his. But apparently, even without words, you knew what he needed.

You'll always have me

You had it the first four times; the fifth time he had you…but was it fast enough?

Better memories with you

He always had bad memories that he could never forget, Hydra, Thanos...but when he sees something on you, something that he associated with a bad memory, looked good on you. Maybe some memories could be forgotten with a little help.

Smooth criminal

Summary: He caught you red-handed, his cowboy hat in your hands, and an accomplice to finish the job. The sheriff had two criminals in his midst. What will he do?

I miss you

You were best friends with him. You loved him. You spent all your time with him. As childhood best friends, you always made time for him. All of your time. But at the end of the day would it be enough for him to love you back?

🪄 Anakin Skywalker 🪄

Blind Trust

Summary: Is he telling you the truth? Or is it built up rage from years of being underestimated? You can't tell but when his love for you is so strong that he would sacrifice anything, including his sanity, to have you, how can you say no?

Divine deception

Summary: You were too good for the Jedi to have. So he had to save you from their lies. He would take you with him. He had no choice. You didn't either.

🦇 Batman 🦇

Behind the Mask

Summary: Somehow the man in the mask was your soulmate. You didn't know anything about him except for late night visits and whispers. But maybe you realized you meant more to him than just run-ins and phone calls.

Till death do us part

Summary: You were married to Bruce Wayne, but he was married to his job. He left you weeks ago and now he shows up bruised and weak. Should you let him in?

Elephant in the room

Summary: You might be a little emotional, crying over small things during your pregnancy. But when Bruce gives you something, it reminds you how much Bruce loves you and your child. Even though sometimes he can't be there to show it.

Heartbeats

Summary: Being pregnant wasn't easy, especially going to parties with Bruce wasn't any easier. But he promised you a slushie before you went, so why not.

Small Misc. Blurbs

Tumblr dividers: not mine, found here

Pictures edited by me

#masterlist #druig x reader #peter parker x reader #steve rogers x reader #loki laufesyon x reader #anakin skywalker x reader #eros x reader #din djarin x reader #bucky barnes x reader #batman x reader #bradley bradshaw x reader

117 notes · View notes

loveforaugust · 3 years

Text

traitor / steve rogers

sour writing activity :)

pairings: steve rogers x reader, steve rogers x natasha romanoff

warnings: angst

a/n: Besties this is horrible. i wrote this between three sittings. forced it out of my ass and finally came out w this. i hate the ending but whatever.

also i made natasha a bitch. and i don’t ship romanogers, although they might’ve made sense, it just worked in this specific scenario.

i’m gonna try and write some other one shots this week. stay tuned :)

I WAS ALSO GONNA MAKE RESDER END UP W THOR. SEND ME THOR REQUESTS, I LOVE MY ASGUARDIAN HIMBO!

brown guilty eyes and little white lies

yeah i played dumb but i always knew

“hey tony, do you have any idea where steve and natasha are?” you asked, looking around for your coworker and boyfriend. you and natasha had never seen eye to eye, but you still liked her company.

they hadn’t mentioned anything about a mission, or any group plans but you were struggling to find them now, when everyone else was at the compound.

this wasn’t the first time, and it most definitely would not be he last, because if you brought it up you were the paranoid partner who didn’t like your boyfriend having ‘girl friends.’

“i think they’re on a mission,” tony lied. fury had cancelled all of the missions this week for some unknown reason. and tony was lying right through his teeth to you.

“oh okay,” you swallowed, faking a smile and walking away, not knowing where your boyfriend was.

that you’d talk to her, maybe did even worse

i kept quiet so i could keep you

losing steve was one fo your biggest fears, you’d lost a lot of people in your life and the fear that he would leave you too quick always got to you. so you willingly sacrificed your right to emotions in the relationship to preserve him.

you’d never liked the idea of steve and natasha together. they were fishy, they always knew everything and would never tell anyone. you would join conversations to watch them die out, to watch natasha send you the look and steve would be oblivious.

you weren’t sure what else they had done (besides the main obvious), but the way he looked at her, the way he smiled and talked and laughed with her all seemed to be better than when he was with you.

and ain’t it funny

that you ran to her the second that we called it quits

and ain’t it funny

how you said you were friends now it sure as hell don’t look like it

it almost seemed like steve was waiting for the second the two of you would separate. like he was waiting for the relationship to end so he could finally have his own fun without you.

not even a day after the two of you broke up was he seen kissing natasha in the common room. while you were sobbing and packing up your stuff, he was out with the woman he told you not to worry about.

“we’re just friends, baby, i know you know that, so why are you so uptight? i love you,” steve would always say, always try and comfort you. he never meant it.

they were never just friends and it was easier if you just refused to believe he ever loved you at all. because with that, it appeared as though less feelings were being hurt, even though you were still broken up inside.

because steve had lied to you. and now none of it seemed real.

you betrayed me and i know that you’ll never feel sorry for the way i hurt

yeah, you talked to her, when we were together

loved you at your worst, but that didn’t matter

“don’t touch me, steve,” you hissed, trying to round your stuff up as quick as you could. he kept trying to grab you, to stop you from moving. to explain to you. but you didn’t want to hear it.

“y/n, i’m sorry!” he shouted at you, as he finally grabbed your arm.

“you’re sorry steve? sorry for what? breaking my heart? making me the bad guy? cheating on me with her?” you tore your arm away from him, pain and rage evident in your eyes.

“i never cheated, y/n, and you know that,” he huffed.

“steve, you told natasha all about the future you planned with her. how you would marry her, and build a life with her, how you loved her more than life itself. if that’s not basically cheating than what is?” you were heartbroken after hearing all about how he acted whilst you two were together.

“i loved you through everything, and you waited for something small and so obscure to happen so you could break my heart, because my love never mattered to you, not if you were acting like that.”

it took you two weeks

to go off and date her

guess you didn’t cheat

but you’re still a traitor

two weeks later, standing alone at another grand party, you were still heartbroken. slightly less, however as the two you dread most were not in attendance.

how your closest friends knew everything that was going on, and never mentioning a single bit to you might have been the worst part. while it most definitely came second to being mind cheated on with a coworker, you had lost every bit of trust you had given said friends.

which led you to a difficult position. one that could harm the potential future of the team. but you were basically already decided. how could you be expected to work with people who don’t have your back?

you can’t.

you planned on announcing your retirement from the team tonight, you weren’t sure whether you would give up the superhero life or continue as an outside agent. but you would figure that out.

steve and natasha entered just as you turned around from getting another drink. you were hoping they wouldn’t show up, hoping they wouldn’t hear directly from you about the retirement.

everyone welcomed them in with open arms, except for the one person who you knew had been there for you. the one person who had your back for the majority of your time as an avenger. james rhodes.

“are you sure you wanna do this? i mean it’s a big step.”

“i can’t work with a team i know doesn’t have my back.” rhodey nodded, he understood and he had your back no matter what you decided.

“everyone we have an announcement!” natasha shouted, the music lowering significantly as she tried to grab everyone’s attention.

“i also have an announcement,” you shouted after she got the room quiet. she shot you a dirty look but you pretended not to notice.

“after some time, we are officially boyfriend and girlfriend!” natasha and steve seemed elated to be together, happier than you had seen him throughout your relationship.

everyone applauded them as they stepped down to let you on the makeshift podium. you stepped up, stomach churning after that announcement.

“a lot has happened in the past couple weeks that has really solidified my decision on this. i know rhodey has been notified about this and so has agent fury but i am announcing my official retirement form the avengers.” a collective gasp was heard around the room as you stepped down.

“why are you punishing us over something that’s not even our fault?” wanda asked, seemingly heartbroken.

“you guys didn’t have my back when i needed you, you all lost the trust i had in you. i can’t work like that.” you turned your back and began to walk away. getting nearer and nearer towards the exit made your breathing speed up. until you were stopped by a hand gripping your wrist.

“don’t leave, y/n, cmon, you know we’re sorry.” steve spoke, his voice low and slow.

“i any do it, steve. i wasn’t just back stabbed by you, it was by all of the team.”

“i never cheated on you.”

“i know, but you’re still a traitor.”

#steve is really hot though #steve rogers angst #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #stevenat #steve x reader #captain america x reader #captain america #olivia rodrigo x marvel #marvel x you #marvel angst #avengers x reader #avengers angst

330 notes · View notes

nationalharryleague · 4 years

Text

Diplomacy

Pairing: Harry Styles x Reader

Genre: Enemies to Lovers Royal AU

Word count: 12K (I may have gotten carried away)

Warnings: Parental Death, an American writing about monarchies she doesn’t understand

A/N: Hi everyone! I have been working on this one for a while and it’s by far the longest thing I’ve ever written and I am so proud of it (please be nice)!! I also made a Pinterest board with all the outfits from this if you want to check it out here!! SO SO SO much love to @meetmymouth @bfharry and @hardcandy-harry for helping me out when I needed it and being the most wonderful people in general :) As always, thank you so so much for reading!! More of my writing can be found in my masterlist and feedback/reblogs mean the world!!!

****

Y/N knew from the day she could understand the concept of marriage that she would one day be married to the little prince with wild brown curls her mother always forced her to play with. She still vividly remembered the first time he told her that she was ugly and that he hated her. She was only five years old at the time.

Fortunately, she hated him just as much as he hated her. He was rude, somehow always sticky, and seemed to have no filter or manners, letting every nasty thing he could think of fall past his lips in daggers aimed at his future wife.

As they grew older, their animosity only grew, from petty to school yard quarrels to attacks on their personalities and who they were as people. Despite her pleas to her mother to be sent to a different boarding school than the one he was already attending, she was shipped off.

She studied judiciously, what was expected of every future queen, while she watched Harry meander through his schooling. He never seemed to listen in class, never studied, and seemed to only care about football and girls. She watched with jealousy and contempt as he flirted with every girl at their school, every girl except the one he knew he was to marry; while every boy in the school knew Y/N was off limits, direct orders from the crown.

It made her uncomfortable how much she disliked him. She was not a hateful person, having been trained well to treat everyone with dignity and respect, she was a princess after all. But something about Harry just got under her skin. She barely was able to control the instinctive eye roll whenever his name was mentioned and she often pretended to gag when discussing him with her friends, especially when one of them would inevitably call him ‘dreamy.’

The happiest day of her life was the day she watched him graduate, knowing she had been awarded years of peace without having to listen to his taunts or watch him flirt with everything that breathed. During those years, she flourished. She grew from a timid girl in line for power to a confident young woman preparing for the crown. She knew her country through and through, her constitution front to back, and had even begun studying Harry’s country as well. Whether she liked it or not, she knew she would have to pick up his slack in governing his kingdom eventually, she might as well be good at it.

Four more years of education at Cambridge, brought four more years of growth and being free from Harry, but the deal she had made with her mother was quickly coming to a close. As soon as she finished her education, their engagement would be made official and wedding planning would commence. While she was tempted to beg for some sort of delay or escape, she understood this was her duty. She owed this to her people, and soon to Harry’s as well; her mother was counting on her.

For the first time in too many years, she stood inside her former and future home. She remembered running through the halls of the massive palace under the ornate ceilings that now hung above her again; reality was sinking in. Through the massive wooden doors that sat in front of her, she knew her fate awaited; a fate named Harry. With a deep breath she steeled herself and smoothed the blush pink lace skirt of her dress, preparing to see the face that had haunted her for so long.

The first thing she noticed was the playful smirk that she associated so closely with his taunts from when they were children. It was the smirk that made her stomach drop; she could only imagine the nasty things that could come past those lips now. He had years to practice.

He stood confidently next to her mother, who had a bright and triumphant grin on her face. He was dressed in an impeccably tailored forest green suit, decorated with his coat of arms pin on the lapel. She wished for the vibrance of his green eyes to lessen but the tone of his suit only made them more intense than she had remembered.

“Harry,” she breathed, as diplomatically and with as much confidence as she could muster. “It’s good to see you,” she lied, reaching her hand out for him to kiss in the antiquated custom that always made her deeply uncomfortable. He delicately grasped her hand and slowly brought it to his blushed lips, the kiss lingering longer than what could have been considered friendly. His snake-like eyes locked with hers, still containing the mischievous glint she had nightmares about. She couldn’t help but notice the hysterically hopeful smile on her mother’s face as she watched them interact.

“It’s always a pleasure, your highness,” he hummed. He must have remembered how uncomfortable that title made her. She was honestly impressed at how he managed to lie and antagonize her in the first sentence he had said to her in over six years.

“Please call me Y/N,” she instructed as politely as possible.

“As you wish,” he said with a conniving smirk on his face. She had been with him no more than two minutes and she already wanted to run for her life. But this wasn’t about her, her country would need a leader soon, and unfortunately, that had to be her.

Her mother rushed over excitedly between the two, breaking the contemptuous silence that had built between them. “Oh children, it’s so nice to see you two back together again. I remember when you used to play when you were little. Always teasing, like you had the biggest crushes on each other.” ‘Teasing’ is a nice way to refer to torture, Y/N thought to herself, never daring to verbalize a thought like that.

“We did always have fun didn’t we, Y/N?” Harry asked her, a thin glaze of politeness coating his malice.

“Oh yes, we did. I still have a scar on my thigh from when you pushed me off the monkey bars.” Her tone was tight lipped and curt, her politeness beginning to give way to the verbal lashing she was dreaming of giving him.

“You’ll have to show me sometime.”

Y/N’s jaw nearly hit the ground. She knew he was a dirty good for nothing flirt, but in front of her mother? If her mother hadn't gently grasped both of their hands, she would have stomped out of the room. Her mother’s gentle touch brought her mind back to what this was all about once again.

“Harry is going to be staying with us from now on,” her mother interjected, clearly sensing the animosity between them. “Oh, and I nearly forgot! Harry, I believe you have something for Y/N, correct?”

“Of course.” He flashed his charming smiles at her poor mother, “How could I have forgotten about that?”

She watched him intently as he reached for the pocket inside his suit jacket, pulling out a small indigo colored velvet box. He opened the box with delicate hands to reveal one of the most gorgeous engagement rings Y/N had ever seen. A deep green emerald sat inside a ring of crystal clear diamond florets, all placed meticulously with care into a gold setting, the color of the velvet intensifying the emerald stone. “It was my grandmother’s,” he spoke softly, the first time she had ever heard him speak with any emotion or genuine feeling. “Before she died, she said she wanted you to have it. She was the mastermind of this arrangement afterall,” he said with a slight chuckle. “For formality’s sake,” he began with a sigh, “will you marry me?”

No, passed through Y/N’s head, but “Yes” fell from her lips. While her heart broke for herself and any chance she had of finding true love, the smile and happy tears in her mother’s eyes reminded her why she was doing all of this. She needs me to do this, Y/N thought to herself, my country is going to need a leader.

Their engagement was announced later that day by royal decree and their wedding was scheduled for the next month. There was no going back now.

The palace was in a flurry of planning and plotting for the big day. Y/N was rushed from meeting to meeting, instructed to make decisions about everything and anything she wanted for the wedding. She stared at floral arrangements until her eyes hurt and flipped through magazines looking at bridesmaid and flower girl dresses until her fingers felt like they were about to fall off. Unsurprisingly to Y/N, Harry was there for almost none of it. Although, she wasn’t exactly complaining about his absence.

He only surfaced when food or his suit was involved. In one vile incident, he arrived at the cake tasting with a wad of gum in his mouth, which was not only strictly prohibited for royals because it could be perceived as being too casual, but Y/N almost called off the entire wedding when she watched him stick chewed bubble gum to the bottom of a 200 year old handcrafted dining table.

“Were you raised by wolves?” she asked through gritted teeth while scolding him and desperately trying to remove the mess.

“Nannies, actually.” She knew by the smirk on his face that he wasn’t done with whatever antagonistic taunts that were planned to fall from his lips. “I’m pretty wild in the bedroom too, wifey.”

His crude comments were meant to hurt her and make her uncomfortable. He knew from their time in school together that she was constantly watched and kept far away from the gaze of any peaking boys, shining a spotlight on the massive double standard between the pair of future rulers. She wore a cloak of inexperience and innocence given to her against her will that embarrassed her to no end, and he knew that the easiest way to pinken her cheeks was to mention sex in any way. He aimed to fluster the poor girl and he got away with it anytime he flashed his dimples in a devilish smirk.

Y/N’s cheeks flushed red in embarrassment and furry before she got up from the table and stormed out of the room, muttering “pick whatever fucking cake you want,” before flying down the hallway to her bedroom and slamming the door behind her.

She felt frustrated tears pricking at her eyes as she slid down the back of the heavy wooden door to the floor below her. She let the fabric of her once perfectly steamed dress crumple beneath her and before she let the floodgates of tears open, she looked down at the dainty silver watch that sat on her wrist. You have five minutes until your appointment with the dressmaker, she thought to herself. Three minutes to cry, two minutes to change into a new dress and fix your makeup.

For three minutes, she let all her anger, frustration, and heartbreak fall out of her in loud sobs that anyone on the other side of the door was sure to hear. For three minutes, she let herself feel every angry emotion she had ever felt towards Harry. For three minutes, she didn’t care about her country or her mother needing this wedding. For three minutes, she didn’t care about anything other than her hurt. But only for three minutes.

Then she wiped the tears away, picked herself up off the floor, dressed herself in her favorite navy blue dress, fixed her mascara, and pressed a cool cloth on her cheeks to quell their angry heat. And then she went to see the dressmaker.

The only joy Y/N got out of this whole ordeal was getting to see her dressmaker, Agnes. Agnes was a kind and quiet old woman who was one of the most talented people she had ever met. The pair would sit together for hours discussing styles, the only time her schedule allowed her to relax, and the woman was in the middle of crafting the gown of Y/N’s dreams. It was a lace long sleeved gown with a cathedral length train. The top portion of the lace was sheer, making a strapless neckline visible, before the delicately crafted lace moved crawled up Y/N’s neck into a high collar neckline. It was reserved, but elegant and unique; “just like you,” Agnes once said.

The first time Y/N was able to try the dress on was bittersweet. The dress was stunning and it made her feel like the princess she was, but she did shed a tear thinking about how this moment was tainted with Harry. She wouldn’t be wearing this dress while walking down the aisle to marry the love of her life, she was marrying someone she would consider an enemy.

She bowed down reverently when her mother placed a veil and tiara on her head. The tiara was encrusted with diamonds and speckled with emeralds that happened to match her engagement ring. The tiara was an heirloom and every woman in her family had worn it while getting married for the last two hundred years.

Her mother wept softly before her, a proud smile on her lips. “I’m so happy I get to see you in the wedding tiara before I go, sweetheart,” she said leaning in to press a gentle kiss to Y/N’s cheek. “I know you and Harry aren’t always a perfect pair and neither were your father and I, but we made you.” The queen’s eyes flashed over her face trying to take her in, “And you turned out to be my proudest achievement and the savior of a nation.”

“Thank you, Mama.” She hadn’t called her mother by that name since she was a young girl but it just felt right at that moment. She felt like a child, needing someone to take care of her while she waited for a country to fall on her shoulders.

“I will always guide you through whatever I can,” she said tenderly. “Even when I’m not here, I will always be with you.” Y/N watched as her mother’s eyes welled with more tears, excusing herself quickly before they grew more intense.

Not more than five minutes later, she heard the obnoxious whistling that she had begun to hear in her nightmares from down the hall. What she didn’t expect was for Harry to burst through the door, not only interrupting her fitting, but seeing the dress before the wedding day.

Like all members of traditional royal families, Y/N was extremely superstitious. Her heart immediately broke as she watched his eyes look her up and down, like there was a little piece of her that thought if they did everything right and didn’t break any traditional rules, maybe they would work out. What hurt her even more was that he didn’t even try to leave. He just sat down on a chair, smacking his gum, and stared at her like he was doing nothing wrong. Her eyes were still filled with tears from the emotional moment with her mother and they continued to flow, no longer out of love, but out of anger and frustration.

“Agnes,” Y/N finally spoke, voice cracking as she tried to hold back her tears, “will you excuse us for a moment?”

“Yes, your highness,” Agnes took delicate steps backwards like she was expecting a bomb to go off, before turning around and scurrying out of the room. Her instincts were correct, because at that moment, Y/N exploded.

“What did I ever do to you Harry?” she questioned angrily. “Why are you so determined to absolutely ruin my life? It’s bad enough that I am having an arranged marriage, not even one that I have the tiniest bit of say in.” She watched Harry’s eyes grow wide, like he had never expected her to stand up to him. “I have spent my entire life being watched and guarded, and avoided by every man I’ve ever gotten close to because I was already claimed by someone who wanted nothing to do with me.” She couldn’t remember the last time she had raised her voice like this at someone; she wasn’t sure if she ever had before. “You can’t even pretend that you like me or that we won't be miserable for our entire lives.”

“Y/N, I don’t want this either,” he spoke after a moment of silence, the quiet only broken by Y/N’s heaving breath. “Why can’t you just calm down?”

“Why can’t I calm down?” she repeated. “Maybe because my country is looking to me to become it’s queen. I can’t give myself to my people when I am worrying about you and your incompetence. You may not become king in your country for another 30 years; you have time to learn and grow into a ruler because you’re in my monarchy and you get to learn here first. You’re playing king with my people. Millions of people rely on us the second I am crowned and you act like your irresponsibility doesn’t have far reaching consequences.”

“I’ll be perfectly fine,” he spat back at her, rolling his eyes with his arms crossed in front of himself as he sat back in the chair. “I can’t believe I have to marry you and into this family.”

Y/N felt like she had been punched in the gut. She was stuck with this man for the rest of her life and here he was, disrespecting her, her people, and her family. “Get out,” she said under her breath. When he didn’t move from his seat, she began to yell once again, “Get out! I mean it!” She dropped her voice once again, and spoke more seriously than she ever had before. “I have never hated anymore more than I hate you, Harry. I am doing all of this because I love my country and my people, but I want you to know, I will never be happy because of you.”

For a moment, through her tears, it looked like he had been hurt because of her words, but he was gone from the room before she could confirm it.

She fell to her knees on the dress platform, surrounded by the piles of pure white fabric. She was a perfectly dressed ball of furry and sobs, angry at the world and her predicament. Leaning over and putting her head in her hands, she felt the tiara as it began to slip off her head, falling into her lap.

Y/N picked up the tiara, using gentle reverent hands, examining it closely. The tiara represented the monarchy and every female ruler in her family that had come before her. It shined and dazzled in the bright lights of the room, its crystal clear and emerald stones reflecting multi colored light onto the crisp white of the dress below her. “I’m doing this for you,” she whispered quietly to the tiara like it could answer, tears still silently rolling down her face.

***

They didn’t speak again for almost a week. They communicated solely through their royal secretaries, sending the poor men back and forth with angry messages, almost gossiping about what was happening with each member of the pair when they returned to the sender. Y/N hated Harry, Harry hated Y/N; the same sentiment sent back and forth over and over. The two were driving fast towards a brick wall, and the brick wall was their wedding.

When she woke up one morning about a week before their nuptials, there was a small envelope sitting on the ground like it had been slid underneath her bedroom door. We have to talk, was all it read. It was not lost on her that the stationary had a small olive branch illustrated onto the page.

Later that afternoon, they met in the garden. It felt like a neutral place to talk, the palace obviously being her territory. She had worn a casual flowing white dress, like she was raising a white flag; and she carefully walked with a mug of black coffee, a peace offering of sorts, careful not to get any of the dark liquid on the fabric of her dress.

She found him along a bed of purple Hyacinths, their sweet perfume enveloping them both, sitting on the soft ground dressed in the most casual clothes she had ever seen him in. He was wearing a simple lilac button up and a pair of jeans. He seemed more approachable this way, without the tailoring and the coat of arms that always sat on his lapel. The golden highlights in his curls came out in the sun and his tanned skin seemed to glow. He held a rose colored leather bound notebook in his hands.

“Hi,” she said softly, a sharp contrast to her screaming the last time they spoke. “I brought you a coffee. The nice ladies in the kitchen say you take it black.” The corners of his mouth turned up slightly and he gave her a friendly but unenthusiastic smile.

“Thank you,” he breathed, as she handed him the hot mug.

“Can I sit?”

“I’m not in charge of you,” he mumbled into the cup taking a sip. It wasn’t until she noticed how his eyebrow shot up and how his eyes had a playful gleam in them, that her offence washed away. “Of course, you can sit down.”

“What’s the book for?” she asked gently once she settled on the ground a safe distance away from him. She decided a few grass stains were worth being on speaking terms with the man she was supposed to marry.

“Um, it’s actually for you.” He reached over and placed the book in her hands. She ran her hands over her initials that had been embossed onto the leather cover. “I’ve been meaning to give it to you for a while,” he said quietly, “I remember you used to write a lot when we were in school together. I thought you would like it.” She felt a confusing mixture of thankfulness for the book, guilt for her outburst, and all the frustration that she still held towards him.

“Thank you, Harry. That was really thoughtful of you.”

A silence hung among them, neither of them sure of the next steps this conversation had to take.

“Can we talk?” Harry asked, finally breaking the tension between the pair.

“Yes, please,” she answered just as quickly as he had asked.

“I wanted to apologize for interrupting your fitting like that. I didn’t know all the traditions meant so much to you and I never meant to make you so upset.” She had never heard Harry apologize before, to anyone else, and definitely not to her.

Before that moment, she had always thought of him as an impenetrable force, wondering if there even was a soul or a conscience in his body. But here he was, vulnerability and all, offering an olive branch and an apology.

“Thank you,” she said cautiously, wading into the almost friendly waters she had never been in with him. “I’m sorry for screaming at you like that. I said some very hurtful things to you.”

“So have I.”

“I want you to know that I don’t hate you and I shouldn’t have said I did. But, I don’t necessarily like you either, Harry,” she said, deciding now was the time they needed to open the line of communication. One of them would eventually combust if they continued on with their hatred like this. “You have tortured me since we were little kids and it’s going to take me some time for me to get over that.” She watched as he nodded his head along with her words, seeming to listen intently.

“I feel like that is also something I should apologize for. No offence, but I didn’t want to get married to you either- still don’t, but I was much more of a dick about it then,” he let out a light laugh, flashing one of his famous dimples before releasing a sigh. “I took out not having control of my life out on you and I’m sorry.” She never thought she would receive validation for all the hurt he put her through for so long.

“Listen, we are getting married as part of a diplomatic partnership,” she began, “I feel like we should at least act diplomatic towards each other.”

“Does that mean that we have to be friends?”

“Definitely not. Just not enemies.”

“I think I can do that, wifey.”

***

The next week passed in a surprisingly civil blur for them both. Y/N was still in the throws of getting ready for a wedding and Harry was off doing whatever Harry usually did. She didn’t expect him to be doing much but she was just glad he was out of her hair. But when they did run into each other, usually at some sort of meeting surrounding the menu, they had a new found respect for the other.

The pair hadn’t been fighting which was nice for a change, even though it did raise some eyebrows in both of their staff. At her final dress fitting two days before the wedding Agnes had asked her if she was ready to be a married woman. “Absolutely not,” Y/N had laughed, “but it’s my responsibility to my people and my country. I have lived the most privileged life imaginable up until this point, it’s time for me to begin my duties.”

“You’re a good girl, your highness. You’re going to make a great queen when the time comes. Even with a husband you may have to wrangle sometimes.” She ended her compliments with a giggle as she zipped Y/N into the dress, and she felt her heart warm. Agnes placed the final touches of the veil and tiara on top of her head, giving her a nod of permission to finally look at herself in the mirror.

The dress fit her like a glove. The delicate lace ran the expanse of the dress, starting at the very back of her immensely long train and crawling its way all the way to Y/N’s throat, and the fitted top half gave way to a full ball gown skirt. Y/N’s eyes followed the intricate lace patterns down her arm, eyes eventually landing on her hand and the ring that sat upon it. For the first time since it had begun to sit on her ring finger, she didn’t want to throw it across the room in frustration. It really was gorgeous and the tiny inkling of respect she had for Harry now made it much less painful to look at.

Staring at the mirror, she noticed the blurring of her vision and the wetness on her cheeks.

“I really am getting married, aren’t I?” she asked with a disbelieving laugh.

“Yes you are, your highness.” Agnes looked up at her through her thick lensed glasses with a proud smile on her face. “Now, let’s get you out of this contraption so you can go rest up for the big day.” Anges’ skilled hands freed Y/N from the beautiful layers of fabric and tulle and sent her on her way back to her bedroom.

Y/N was finally almost asleep in the early hours of the morning when she heard a gentle and almost timid knock on her door. She could have ignored it, rolled back over and let her dreams take her, but for some reason it felt important for her to get out of bed and answer the door. Her bare feet hit the cold wood floors and she tip-toed her way to the door.

When she grabbed the knob to open it, she heard a familiar voice say “don’t open the door! I don’t think I’m supposed to see you,” in a hurried and hushed tone.

“Harry?”

“Yeah, it’s me.” His voice was gravelly with exhaustion and had an apprehensive, almost nervous quality she had never heard from him before.

“Why are you here?”

“I just wanted to talk to you.” He said it so softly she wouldn’t have been able to hear him if her ear wasn’t pressed up against the doorway. The sentiment brought a smile to her lips and she wasn’t completely sure why. She was quiet for a moment, deciding if she wanted to turn him away or not when she heard him sarcastically ask, “What? I’m not allowed to talk to my wife?”

“I’m not your wife yet,” she reminded him with a tired chuckle. “But we can talk,” she assured him. “I’m going to sit down, okay? My legs are tired from my heels all day.” She kneeled down and leaned herself up against the hard wooden door.

She had been in this same position only a few weeks before, angry at the world and wanting to kill the man on the other side of it; but here she was, speaking to him willingly, even joking with him. She listened close as his own body rested against the floor and leaned on the opposite side, mirroring her own position.

“Those heels really hurt, don’t they?” he asked, voice still hushed. If she wasn’t so tired, she might have even said she heard a smile in his voice.

“Yeah, they are like little death traps for your feet and legs.” He let out a small laugh on the other side and her lips pulled into a smile that she hadn’t given them permission for.

“How many pairs do you have? You always match your dress to your shoes so you must have a ton.”

She was gradually learning that he was much more observant than she had originally thought. He apparently wasn’t the dumb boy that she remembered from school anymore.

“Too many,” she said with a soft laugh and a shake of her head. “I’m wearing my favorites tomorrow.”

“And which ones are those?”

“They’re white, obviously; they have to match,” she smiled. “They have a green gem at the toes. They match the tiara I’ll be wearing.” She stopped for a moment before continuing on. “And your grandmother’s ring.” She played with the gold band that sat on her ring finger, still somehow dazzling in the very limited light of her dark room. “Thank you, by the way. It’s gorgeous.”

“You’re welcome. She wanted you to have it.”

“Did she really?”

“Oh, yeah,” he said confidently on the other side of the door. She imagined him nodding along with his words to emphasize his point, as he often did while speaking. “She kept tabs on you while we were growing up. She was always talking about how smart you seemed and that you would be a good queen one day. If I didn’t know better, I would say she liked you more than me growing up.” Y/N felt her cheeks heat up with the information. She was flattered by his grandmother’s opinion of her, but her heart also ached for Harry.

“I’m sure that's not true.”

“I think it was. I was always screwing up in one way or another; always creating messes that her and my parents had to clean up.” He paused for a moment and she heard him let out a long sigh. “Always running around with other girls and making the one I was supposed to marry feel like shit.”

She wished she could see his face. She wished that she could get a read on his emotions. But there was, literally and figuratively, a wall between them.

“Y/N,” she heard his voice squeak out through a voice crack, “I really am sorry for everything I’ve done to you.”

“I know. I forgive you, Harry.”

Saying those four words, lifted a weight she didn’t know she had been carrying off her shoulders. This moment felt like an absolution, a time to wipe their long and complicated slate clean. There was no better time for them to start anew than the night before they began the next chapter of their lives. But this chapter would be together, as a pair and a team.

“Thank you.”

“I’m sorry too, Harry. I know this all had to happen so fast so I could take the throne, but I know you thought you had more time. I thought I did too.”

“What do you mean? Why did it have to happen so fast?” he asked.

First, Y/N was confused. There was a very obvious answer. Then her heart began to break for him. He wasn’t ready at all for what was coming. No one must have told him.

“Harry,” she said softly, “Do you know about my mother?”

“What do you mean?” From the tone in his voice, she knew he genuinely didn’t know.

“My mom-” she began gently, swallowing the lump in her throat that always appeared when she began to talk about this, “My mom is dying, Harry.” She heard a soft gasp through the door before she went on. “She’s been sick for a while, but things are getting really bad. Her doctors think she only has a couple weeks left.”

She listened to his breathing stop, like his mouth was hung open searching for something to say. He was quiet for a few moments before he landed on what seemed like the only thing he had said over and over these last few weeks, “Y/N, I’m so sorry. I’m here for you if you need to talk about all of this.”

His offer was not lost on her. The idea of Harry being someone she could confide in was a new one, but one that she would consider.

“It’s okay.” She choked out, wiping a few stray tears that had found their way out, off her cheeks. “I have had enough time to come to terms with it. But in our archaic constitution,” she said with a biting distaste in her voice, “a woman cannot become the sovereign of the country if she isn't married. That’s why this all had to happen so fast.”

“I see.”

The pair were quiet, both curled up on opposite sides of the wall; simultaneously experiencing a unique type of loneliness that only the other could understand. In less than 12 hours, they would be married, linked by an oath that neither of them had signed up for, in circumstances with responsibilities that neither of them were ready to handle.

“Harry,” she peeped, breaking a silence that hung heavy over them both, “you should go to sleep. We have a big day tomorrow.”

She listened through the door to the rustling of him getting up off the floor beside her. “You should get some sleep too.”

“I’ll try my best.”

“So will I. I’ll see you at the altar, wifey.”

She let out a strangled laugh at the nickname he had adopted for her, her throat still tight from crying. She listened to his foot falls until they disappeared down the hallway before she mustered the strength to drag herself back to bed. Her staff was on strict orders from the wedding planner to have her woken up at 8 to begin getting ready and she wanted to get some rest before the sun came up.

And like clockwork, her curtains were thrown wide open at 8 am, sunlight blinding her as she woke up. Her eyes took a moment to adjust to her rude awakening, but soon she could make out the bustling room around her. Hair stylists, makeup artists, bridesmaids, flower girls, her mother, and some lady with an ear piece and a clip board fluttered about her bedroom with an excited chatter. Taking in the chaotic scene, it really hit her. Holy shit, I’m getting married today, she thought.

Her stomach twisted and turned in knots as the gaggle of women fawned over her, instructing her to stay still and “stop shaking” as they applied layers of makeup and fussed with her hair. Her hair was pulled into a delicately crafted low bun and her eyes were painted with neutral tones and a little bit of shimmer. Diamond and emerald earrings were threaded through her ear lobes and her fingernails were inspected to see if they needed any touch ups. Her shaky body was zipped into her dress and her feet slipped into her heels while her cathedral length veil was pinned meticulously into her hair. She was only missing one last thing.

“Your tiara, your highness,” her mother joked through the happy and proud tears welling up in her eyes. The tiara was the one last thing she needed before she was sent on her way to the cathedral. She bent down slightly, her mother delicately crowing her; when she rose, she couldn't help but grab onto her mother and hold her tight. It was hard for her not to think about the next time she would be crowned, a time when her mother wouldn’t be there to offer the guidance or support Y/N needed.

“I love you, Mama,” was all she said. It was the only reason all of this was happening. She loved her mother too much to let her down.

“I love you more, my princess,” her mother said gently, before turning away and scurrying off to do something else. Y/N tried to ignore the wince on her face when she moved too fast and the slight wheeze she made when she was speaking.

Surveying the scene around her, Y/N felt like she was about to die. Her heart was pounding hard in her ears, her palms were slick with sweat, her breathing was labored, and her chest felt tight. She had never been so overwhelmed with anxiety before. She had known today was coming her entire life, but the fact that it really was here was too much for her brain to wrap itself around.

It was like she had blacked out from fear, an hour of her life completely unaccounted for. She didn’t remember the last minute checks and touches to her hair and makeup. She didn’t remember her mother delicately resting her veil over her face. She didn’t remember getting in the car bringing her to the cathedral. She didn’t remember someone shoving a bouquet of flowers in her hands. She didn’t remember the music starting up or walking down the aisle of the giant imposing and ornate cathedral.

She was only brought back to reality when she reached the imposing altar and Harry delicately took her hand into his. His green eyes were painted with concern when he saw the worried crease between her eyebrows and the way she was chewing on her bottom lip under her sheer veil, swiping his thumb up and down her skin in an attempt to soothe her. It was the first time he had ever touched her voluntarily; it was a gentle and tender touch, full of care. She gripped back tight onto his hand, holding on for dear life as she thought over everything that was about to happen.

They were instructed to stand forward, watching the officiant as he droned on about love and duty to one’s country and spouse, but their hands stayed clasped tight onto each other, like they were being thrown into a stormy and unpredictable sea and the other’s hand was their only life line. And in a way, they were.

When they were told to turn towards each other to begin their vows, their eyes locked and she began to really look at him for the first time. She watched his plush lips closely as he recited the words fed to him from the officiant, although she didn’t hear a single word of them. Her eyes traced his strong cheekbones and landed on his adorable button nose before returning back to his eyes. She noticed the slight blue bags that sat under them, signaling he had just as much trouble sleeping as she did.

His eyes brought her a calm that she hadn’t felt in years, silently telling her that she wasn’t alone in all of this, his warm hands still holding on to hers punctuating that sentiment. There wasn’t anyone else in the massive cathedral but the pair of them anymore, just two scared kids trying to make it through the demands weighing on their shoulders together.

Shaky hands exchanged rings, her heart stopping for a moment when the ring caught and didn’t slide onto his finger gracefully. But her heart regained it’s rhythm when she heard a light chuckle coming from the man across from her, a gentle smile that was just big enough to flash a dimple at her, signaling that it would be okay.

She recited her vows without much thought, letting ‘I do,’ slip past her lips while still entranced by Harry’s intense yet comforting gaze. She watched his strong hands disconnect from hers as he lifted the lace trimming on the veil covering her face, dark lashes flickering down to her glossed lips. She let her eyes fall closed as he leaned in towards her and rested a hand on her cheek, prompted by the officiant and clapping coming from the pews, bracing herself for a feeling of disgust she hoped wouldn’t come.

He carefully connected their lips softly with a sweetness that felt gentle, tender, and caring. But there was more to the kiss than a softness, there was a respect there as well. His hand felt secure and protective on her cheek, and he pulled away with a smile after a short time, sure not to overwhelm her. The feeling of disgust in her belly that she was waiting for never came; if she didn’t know better she would say she felt an excited flutter.

They stood on the altar for a moment and just stared at each other, excited and relief filled smiles creeping into their lips, his dimples prominent. “Shall we, wifey?” Harry beamed with a sigh, extending a hand to lead her back down the aisle, now as a married woman.

“We shall, husband,” she giggled back, cheeks still a fiery red from their contact. Calling him her husband felt foreign, but not unwelcome.

Harry held her hand tight, keeping her in the moment by the warm contact. He held her hand down the aisle and all the way back to the palace, all throughout the signing of their marriage license, and all throughout the many, many photos taken of the two and their wedding party. She found comfort in his warm touch, continuing to ground her through the chaos that unfolded around them. Even when they had briefly disconnected from each other, he was always close by, only a call of his name away.

She was shocked by how careful he was around her giant dress, taking calculated steps to avoid dirtying the crisp white fabric. He was playing the role of a dutiful husband, and was seeming to enjoy it.

They spent the next hours just following orders from wedding planners, shuffled around from place to place, constantly surrounded by people. All she wanted was a moment to speak to him alone, but it seemed far out of reach.

That moment finally came in the middle of a dance floor, with hundreds of eyes staring at them as they danced. They swayed together slowly, a gentle rock to the delicate sound of strings. “Thank you for staying by me all day, Harry,” she said quietly, hoping that no one could hear them over the music.

“No need to thank me, wifey,” he said with a chuckle, his lips grazing against her ear as he spoke. She chuckled like always at the name and shook her head.

“I mean it. I don’t think I would have been able to get through all of this,” she said looking out at the crowd watching them and the giant ornately decorated ballroom they were in the center of, “if you hadn’t been by my side.”

“I quite like it, actually. I could get used to standing with you.” He said nonchalantly, like it was no big deal, while her heart just about stopped.

She wasn’t able to answer before the music slowed to a stop and they were pulled apart by their mothers and dragged off to speak to “very important” people. He seemed just as disappointed as she was when they were separated.

When they finally found each other again, Y/N had changed. She had abandoned her massive conservative skirt of tulle and lace for a creamy silk gown that she could actually move in. It was a simple a-line v-neck dress with cap sleeves, but the back held a deep V that ended at the small of her back coupled with a loosely tied bow.

The cool breeze on her back made her feel sexy. She knew she was pushing the boundaries on what was appropriate for a princess and she loved it.

“My darling, you look gorgeous,” he said, taking her hand and spinning her so he could fully take in the new dress, mindful of her tiara and trying his best not to knock it off. Her cheeks burned at his flattery, something he could surely feel when he pulled her close and pressed a delicate kiss on her cheek.

“You’re just saying that,” she said bashfully staring down at the floor, deflecting the compliment easily.

“Wifey,” he singsonged the teasing nickname that had evolved into a term of endearment. He lifted her chin to look up at him and he looked down at her with the most honest expression she had ever seen him wear. “You look beautiful. You have all day.”

“Thank you, Harry.” She spoke quietly, barely audible, unsure what to make of her husband’s compliments. He leaned in to her, layed a tender kiss on her forehead, and dragged her across the room to the dance floor.

They stayed on the dancefloor most of the night, almost always touching in some sort of way, while dancing and celebrating with their friends and family.

And Y/N was happy; a genuine type of happiness that she hadn’t felt in a very long time. Obviously, this wasn’t ideal. She was now married to a man she knew virtually nothing about, who had been a sworn enemy of hers only a few days ago, and had only begun enjoying his company last night. But happiness isn’t linear, she thought to herself.

Their night had passed in a joyous and opulent blur that went late into the night; full of food, dancing, and a swimming pool's worth of champagne.

Eventually both of them were led, by dutiful staff as they were both quite drunk and couldn’t exactly be trusted to make it on their own, to their new bedroom, or bedrooms depending on who you asked. They were led into the massive room consisting of two separate suites connected by a dressing room of sorts in a cloud of giggles, finding themselves in a fit of laughter after passing a portrait in the hall of some distant ancestor who had an amusing mustache.

“Thank you for leading us back,” she said, trying to gain a sober composure to the men who had flanked them on their way back, “you can go now.” The men shared a look between themselves that seemed to say ‘someone should be watching them,’ but followed the princess’ orders anyway.

“I just can’t understand how he got it to curl like that,” Harry cackled, beginning to wheeze from his hysterics and slightly stumbling as he was doubled over.

“Maybe it was natural like your curls,” she suggested, through her giggling hiccups that she let return when their staff left the room. “I quite like your curls, ya know? I like it when you let them grow a bit.”

They were still holding hands, despite being alone in their new found privacy, no longer needing the support from the other to shield them from the pressure of looking eyes.

“Then I’ll have to grow them out a bit,” he said, a smile still beaming at her with droopy drunk eyes. He tugged on her hand softly, bringing her body into his and setting his hand on the exposed skin of the small of her back. His hands were warm and soft and in the moment, she never wanted his hand to move from that spot again. “I can’t refuse the princess’ orders.” His voice had dropped low, not to a whisper but to a soft and lazy volume that made her feel safe.

Their faces were close and she could smell his strong vanilla and sandalwood cologne coming off him that she wanted to envelop herself in. He looked back down at her with a face that was loving, but she attributed it to the alcohol in his system. For a moment, she was overwhelmed with adoration for this man who she had spent so much of her life violently hating. Admiring and adoring him was much easier on her soul than harboring the hatred that had eaten at her for so long.

“I have another order,” she spoke quietly, letting the words tumble from her lips without her usually logical brain’s permission, “I want you to kiss me. For real this time.”

His lips were on hers as soon as the words left her own. It was sloppy and sweet, but with a passion behind it that Y/N felt in her bones. Their lips moved in a drunken rhythm, with Harry’s aimless wandering hands sliding up and down the silk of her dress before resting on her waist and pulling her impossibly closer to him. Her hands found and twirled the few of Harry’s curls that remained after they had cut his hair shorter than usual for the ceremony at the base of his neck and sunk her fingers into it, pulling him further into the kiss by his hair.

It was not long before their tongues found each other and the kiss deepened into a desperate dance of gasping for breath and soft moans into each other’s mouths. Harry’s mouth left hers and began to press sloppy open mouthed kisses down her neck while fiddling with the bow at the back of her gown that would release it from her frame.

Feeling him fuss with the bow made her pounding heart shift from one of excitement, to one of panic. This was too soon, she didn’t know him well enough. She didn’t know his favorite color or any of his hobbies. She didn’t know how he liked his tea, or if he drank it at all. She didn’t even know his middle name.

Her fuzzy mind couldn’t deny how much she didn’t know about him or the anxiety that made her want to pull away from the man and run.

“Harry,” she breathed, voicing the apprehension and anxiety that had begun to rise in her chest, “please stop.” She had squeaked out the words, a mix of embarrassment and panic taking over her slightly slurred words.

His hands froze, pulling himself back quickly from her, a mix of worry and guilt on his face. “Did I do something wrong? I just thought…” he let his words drop off, his own fuzzy mind not sure of what to say either.

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong. I’m sorry, I just can’t.” Her cheeks grew hot and her eyes became glassy.

She was embarrassed to admit it, but the kiss on the altar that morning was the first time she had ever had another pair of lips on her own. Her entire life she had been shielded from men with any interest in her, her affection already spoken for and claimed. No man had ever held her hand romantically, or danced with her, or kissed her with the passion Harry just had.

Harry had lived a life with freedom that she had never been granted. She remembered all the times she had watched him interact with various girlfriends at school, and remembered the shame she had felt when he had ended up on the cover of tabloids after he was photographed naked and kissing a random woman on a yacht. Every article had ended with the same line that she still knew by heart.

“The prince is arranged to marry Princess Y/N when she comes of age in an effort to unify their countries.”

They had lived very different lives, with very different freedoms up until this point. It was sexist and archaic and unfair, but she couldn’t deny the impacts it had on her while she was around Harry. Even though she couldn’t deny that she was beginning to feel something real for him and she believed that he felt the same; she didn’t fully trust him like that yet. She couldn’t.

“I’ve never done any of this before, Harry. This morning was my first kiss.” Her cheeks burned in a mixture of embarrassment and shame as she spoke the words. “I like you a lot, but today has been nerve wracking and scary enough. I just can’t add another new thing into the mix, especially that. It’s just all too much. I’m sorry.”

Her sheltered and delicate heart couldn’t even bring herself to say the word ‘sex’.

As he listened to her explanation, his features softened. They were no longer fearful that he made a mistake or crossed a boundary, but they moved into a soft and caring smile.

“Y/N, my darling,” he began in a soft and sweet voice, “come here.” He beckoned her with open arms to rest up against his chest again. She had curled her arms in front of herself, holding them close to her body, as she walked into his arms and let herself be enveloped by them while resting her head on his chest. “You are my wife now, but I think we both understand that we are not exactly in this position by choice. I would never ask you to do something you are uncomfortable with and I am sorry that I crossed a boundary.”

“Thank you,” she peeped before he continued on.

“Also, I heard that part when you said you liked me a lot,” she could hear the smirk in his voice, making her cheeks inexplicably hotter. “And I like you a lot too.”

The pair stood in that hold long enough for them to lose track of time, just resting against each other in silence, listening to the other’s breathing. The silence that enveloped them was comforting, but Harry eventually spoke again, inexplicably soft and gentle in tone.

“Y/N, I really want to try to make us work.”

“So do I, Harry.”

The pair stood together in their stillness and peaceful quiet, until she let out a small yawn.

Harry released her from his grasp and began walking around the room, opening wardrobes and dressers searching for something. He breathed a small triumphant noise when he opened a drawer, spinning around with a light pink and baby blue nightgown in his hands.

“Do you need any help getting out of your dress? Would I be allowed to help?” His face was so thoughtful, carefully navigating the boundaries she had made him aware of but not set in stone yet.

She took the nightgown from his hands and slipped it over her head, the silk dress beneath it. “I just need help untying the bow.” Her voice was still low, a quiet and delicate murmur.

His hands carefully untied the bow, turning around for modesty’s sake, only turning back around when he heard the silk hit the floor.

She had begun carefully removing the bobby pins that still held her bun together, causing them both to giggle when her hair was finally released into a giant poof of curls and hair spray.

She looked so sweet to him. This was the first time he had seen her relaxed like this, no longer in a fancy dress, heels, and her hair and makeup done to perfection. She looked like a real person to him, not a princess who would soon become queen.

He moved gingerly towards the door of her room, but not before pressing one more soft kiss to her lips.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, wifey.”

“Can’t wait, my husband,” she called from under the covers, watching him close the door behind him.

***

The two were sitting on a hot beach, baking in the sun when the call came.

It was day four of their honeymoon and a week after their wedding, spending their time alone together on a small island in the sun neither of them could remember the name to. It was a paradise straight out of a movie, and she swore nothing could ruin it.

They spent their days learning each other well, often joking that they should make up trivia quizzes for each other to see who knew the other best. She had learned that Harry’s eyes lit up like a child when he saw any type of animal, especially the small lizards that would run across the deck hanging off the back of their small beach house. It was also a surprise when she found out he loved to cook, whipping up a meal that could rival some of the chefs at the palace for dinner one night.

But her favorite thing she had learned about him by far, was how he sang in the shower. He had a low and melodic voice that he didn’t know traveled into the house from the outdoor shower. She would sit by the window closest to him, often pretending to write in the pink notebook he had given her in the garden, close her eyes and appreciate the man’s voice. She swore if he wasn’t a prince, he would be a singer.

In the time since their nuptials, the pair had become lovers. Always attached at the hip and sneaking kisses; they were blissfully and unstoppably becoming increasingly obsessed with the other. The word ‘love’ often played at Y/N’s lips, seeming to always be only a drink away from letting it slip out towards him.

Every day, they would walk down a short path from their house to a pristine white sand beach, picnic basket in hand, and sit. Sometimes they would sit in silence, just staring at the clear blue ocean, and other times they would talk about everything and anything that came to mind, or they would read silently next to each other. But they were always holding onto each other; sometimes it was a hand placed gently on the other’s thigh, or fingers intertwined between them.

The shrill ring of Y/N’s phone broke their fantasy while sitting on the beach on the fourth afternoon. Her heart dropped as soon as she heard it, knowing that the palace had agreed not to bother them unless the worst case scenario was happening.

She closed her eyes and braced herself, tears already threatening to breach her eyes, as she answered the phone with shaky hands. “Hello?” she choked out.

“Your highness, you need to come home.” She immediately recognized the panicked voice of her mother’s secretary on the other end. “It’s happening.”

“Okay,” she said, trying to remain as composed as possible. “We’re leaving now.”

Harry’s face held a furrowed brow and concerned eyes as she spoke. He immediately began rubbing his thumb back and forth over the back of her palm like he had done on their wedding day, but today, it did nothing to soothe her pain and anxiety.

She hung up the phone before letting out a heart wrenching cry. “We have to go home,” she sobbed. “She is dying.”

The entire journey home was silent after Y/N had composed herself on the beach.

She sat emotionless, staring straight ahead, flinching away every time Harry moved to touch her. She spoke only when absolutely necessary, but her voice brought no tone with it. She had become a shell of herself, losing the warmth behind her eyes that had begun to appear after the wedding.

She felt empty, like she had lost the ability to think, while simultaneously feeling so overwhelmed, by thoughts of her future as queen and the loss of her mother. She had become blank, inside and outside, the happiness she had begun to build for herself with Harry, melting away and leaving the hollowness of grief and dread.

It took them about twelve hours to reach the palace from the time she hung up the phone, but it wasn’t fast enough. The second she stepped out of the car, she saw the guards outside the palace dressed in their black uniforms that were reserved only for the passing of the sovereign. She closed her eyes silently, as if when she opened them up again their uniforms would turn back to their usual blue and maroon; but they didn’t, their clothing still black as night.

Her heels clicked the pavement, maintaining her immaculate posture and steely blank expression as she entered the palace, the loving man she had been excited to have a life with trailing mournfully behind her. She watched as if she was out of her body when she passed people, all now dressed in black, in the hall. They all acted the same.

First, they would give her the saddest look, silently extending their sympathies to the daughter who just lost her mother, and then bowing their heads in respect to the now reigning queen.

“I need to see my mother,” was all she said, before being led into her bedroom.

She hadn’t remembered when her father had died, too young to understand. All she could wrap her head around was that her Daddy had an accident and wasn’t coming home. But she remembered her mother’s cries, loud and earth shattering sobs that traveled up and down the hallways of the palace for all to hear.

She looked like she was just sleeping; arms peacefully crossed over her chest and eyes shut gently. But she was cold when Y/N reached for her hand. She tenderly brought her mothers hand to her lips, and pressed a final kiss to her hand, before walking blankly out of the room.

Her mother was gone. And the country fell onto her shoulders.

She heard Harry saying something as he followed close behind her. While she heard him, she didn’t process a thing he said. She stalked towards their bedroom which was unfortunately on the other side of the palace, locked in her daze. He trailed close behind her the entire way, trying to say anything that could break through to her, and stood dutifully outside the door of her side of the bedroom for an unknown amount of time after she had shut it in his face.

***

She didn’t speak, or show emotion, or allow anyone at all to touch her for three days. Only nodding or shaking her head in response to the rapid firing of questions she was asked about planning her mother’s funeral. Harry only saw glimpses of his wife, or the shell of Y/N that she had become, usually while she shut the door to her bedroom between them.

He left his door open all day everyday.

When he awoke the morning of the funeral and found her bedroom door open, his heart jumped. He slowly walked inside to find her in a room full of black dresses. Dresses had been laid carefully over every surface for her to choose from; the dress she would wear to her mother’s funeral and her first public appearance as queen.

“Good morning,” was all he said, quiet and careful.

The person that looked back at him was someone he didn’t recognize. The light was gone from her eyes, and she wasn’t the woman he was head over heels in love with anymore. She looked like her, but emanated sadness and anxiety like nothing he had ever seen before. Dark blue bags held under her eyes from not sleeping, her hair was tied behind her head in a messy unkempt ponytail, and she was dressed in a giant and ill fitting nightgown, shoulders bent down in a fashion that made her look small. The only feature of the put together, confident, and commanding woman he was married to that remained was the bright emerald ring that sat on her ring finger.

“I can’t decide what to wear,” she said without expression, but the tears started to fall down her face before she could finish the sentence. Harry moved quickly across the room to her when he saw her knees began to shake, catching her just in time as they gave out and she fell into his arms, settling them both onto the soft carpeted ground. That was when her heaving sobs began. It was a bone rattling cry that consumed her wholly and her exhausted and hurting brain could only put together two thoughts: she missed her mom, and she didn’t want to take on all this responsibility alone.

She sobbed into his shirt, holding onto the soft and worn fabric of his t-shirt for dear life, and he held her close to his body, slowly rubbing her back and letting all of the emotion fall out of her. She cried for a long time, giving herself a pounding headache, and when the tears finally began to slow she connected her tearful ones with Harry’s ever vibrant green eyes and mumbled, “I just thought I had more time with her. And I thought we had more time to just be us.”

“I know you did, darling.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead and reveled in being able to touch her again, as his heart broke a little every time she would pull away from his touch.

“I’m not ready, Harry. I can’t do this all alone. It’s too much.” She spoke softly, shaking her head from side to side, still choking back sobs as she tried to regain her composure.

“You’re not doing anything on your own. The second we were married, your problems and responsibilities became mine too,” he assured her. He moved to grab her left hand in his own and showed her the rings that sat on their hands. “Remember these?” he breathed with a light chuckle. “You’re stuck with me for life, whether you like it or not.”

He watched as she processed the realization that he was there to lighten the load. It was like a lightbulb had gone off for her, slowly nodding along with what he said. She let her eyes fall to the dresses that surrounded her, but he gently took her chin and directed her eyes back to his. “Y/N, we are a team. I am always here for you and I always will be.”

He took a deep long breath before continuing on, “I love you.”

She didn’t think when she pressed her lips to him, she just did, desperate to be close to him again. A coldness had swallowed her for days, and his words brought back the smallest feeling of warmth, a glimpse of hope she had been desperate to find.

She had known the passing of her mother was coming for years, her illness getting progressively worse over time. She had always believed it would bring more pressure, weighing down on her heavier than ever before. But looking at their rings and the man before her, she was hit by the fact that she never had to carry the weight of the country all by herself. She had Harry the whole time. He was her partner; in life and in power.

“I love you, too,” she said after breaking the kiss, salty from all her tears. She was quiet and her voice was still shaking and unsteady from her sobs, but he was there, holding her and keeping her safe.

He held her hand, slotting their fingers together as he picked them both up off the ground and helped her pick a dress. It was a black blazer dress that fell below her knees with three crystal buttons going down the left side. Harry carefully helped her into the dress, his warm and respectful hands sliding up her bare skin as he pulled it up over her shoulders. He then sat her on her bed, and began to carefully brush out her hair, doing his best to work through knots without hurting the girl who was already hurting enough. And he held one of her hands gently while she sat at her vanity and did her makeup with her free one. He refused to leave her side.

Harry stayed firmly planted by her side throughout the entire day, not daring to leave her while she needed him. He knew that photos of him holding her hand tight during the funeral would make the press, and the photos of him wiping away her tears as they left would make the front page, but he didn’t care. She might be the queen, but she was also his Y/N.

***

Their fingers were always locked together, Harry’s thumb passing back and forth over the back of her hand in the steady rhythm he always used when she was stressed. He was there whenever she needed him, gently taking hold, to remind her that he was there and they were a team.

He cradled her hand as she crushed his, gritting through the most excruciating pain she had ever experienced. It felt like her entire body was being ripped apart from the inside out, but Harry’s hand was the light at the end of the tunnel. She was screaming and crying in the small crowded room, feeling like a science experiment as all the doctors looked on at her pain.

But it all stopped when she heard the smallest little cry.

Then shouts of “It’s a girl!”

Exhausted and elated tears flowed freely from her eyes that were locked on the slimy little baby a nurse was burredly placing on her chest. She was so small, delicate and breakable, with strong lungs that screamed out to announce her entrance into the world. And when her eyes opened for the first time, they revealed the same bright sea glass green tone that matched her father, the green she had been falling in love with and swimming around in for years.

This baby was so much more than just a little girl, not only to them, but to their countries. She would forge a kingdom united in the future, a product of peace and partnership. She was a symbol of unity and a future of kindness between their countries. She was the future.

But for right now, the tiny baby was just theirs.

She felt him press a proud kiss to her head before she connected their lips together in a tear filled kiss before they both looked back to their new pride and joy who was still screaming for all the attention.

“She’s beautiful, darling,” he whispered quietly though tears next to her, hand still grasped tightly onto hers. “You did such a good job.”

“Literally couldn’t have done it without you,” she chuckled, still staring down, entranced by the little girl who looked like her daddy.

The pair stayed with their baby, quiet and just being, long after the doctors and nurses left the room. They learned she liked to scream and sleep, about as much as you could learn about someone only hours old. But she didn’t have a name. They had been debating for the last nine months over what the little princess would be called.

“I think she should be named after your mother,” Harry would say.

“But I think she should be named after your grandmother,” She would reply.

Their roundabout banter never left the pair, only changed; from malicious and teasing, to one of loving partnership.

“So neither?” he quipped with a small smirk while holding the little girl tight to his chest.

“I guess we have to compromise; diplomatically,” she said with a giggle, alluding to how they got to this position in the first place.

“I feel like a loving marriage and a new baby is pretty good for diplomatic relations.”

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING! Please send feedback and reblog if you enjoyed it!

#harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles imagine #harry styles one shot #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles #prince harry styles #Royal AU #Harry styles enemies to lovers #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #one direction #one direction fanfiction

2K notes · View notes