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xx-like-a-villian-xx · 4 months

Text

I'd Love To Watch

You’re forced to share a room with Noah and he wonders what book you’re reading.

This one is for all my dark romance reading babes, stay slay 🥀

My ao3 is HERE

Also let me know if you want to be tagged in anything upcoming posts, (I have so many WIPs)

CW: one bed trope (ugh my fave), mentions of dark romance, fingering, Noah is a MUNCH, squirting, forced proximity (let me know if I need to add any more)

18+ MDNI | Noah Sebastian x Reader

“Are you kidding me?” You groan, staring at the second suitcase in the bedroom that you called dibs on when you arrived at the Airbnb. “Matt, who put their shit in my room?” You call out to your best friend and tour manager who walks towards you, a smug smirk on his face.

”Well Noah kept saying he would take the couch but there’s a California King in there so I told him he should just bunk in with you tonight.” He leans against the doorframe, grinning. “Call it team building.”

”Team building?” You scoff, exasperated.

All you want is one night to yourself without being stuck in a bus full of sweaty guys and Matt thinks it's funny to let the man you’ve been trying to avoid all tour share your room.

Noah doesn’t like you, it’s been clear since day one. Every time he talks to you he’s so patronising and cocky it makes your blood boil but it’s not like you can say much. You’re just their merch girl after all, replaceable. If it wasn’t for Matt you wouldn’t even have the opportunity so you keep your mouth closed and stay out of Noah’s way unless it’s important.

“Does Noah know that we’re sharing?” You fold your arms over your chest, staring at your best friend.

Matt chuckles. “More than aware, he actually seemed fine with it.” Your eyebrow raises in surprise and he laughs. “Goodnight, Y/N.”

You watch Matt retreat to his room and get to work pulling your pyjamas out from your suitcase, locking yourself in the bathroom to get ready for what you now know is going to be a hell of a long night.

While brushing your teeth you hear someone shuffle into the bedroom and you groan internally. Spitting the toothpaste into the sink, you gather your discarded clothes from the day and take a deep breath before opening the en-suite door.

Noah is lying spread eagle on the bed, wearing a pair of basketball shorts with no top, scrolling on his phone. He doesn’t even acknowledge your presence when you put your things back into your suitcase. You roll your eyes, grabbing your book to sit in the window seat across from the bed for a while, quietly reading to yourself. The silence is thick and you can hear his heavy breathing, distracting you from your book.

Your eyes flick from the dark romance novel to the man on the bed, eyes trailing over the expanses of ink that cover his toned skin and you feel heat pooling in your core.

”Anyone ever told you it’s rude to stare?” His voice breaks you out of your trance and your eyes flick back to the words on the page.

You scoff. “I wasn’t staring, you just breathe really loud and it’s pissing me off.”

He chuckles darkly. “Yeah, sure thing sweetheart.”

The sound of movement reaches your ears but you daren’t look at him, lifting the book higher to hide your red face. Suddenly the novel is snatched from your hands and you scramble to grab it back from him.

”Heartless Heathens?” He hums, holding the book out of your reach as he reads the blurb then flicks through a couple of pages, eyes widening. “Jesus, Y/N. I didn’t realise you were into this kinky shit.”

Your face is tomato red, burning hot as you try to wrestle the book from his hands.

“Noah give me my book back!”

All he does is laugh, eyes flicking back and forth as he reads the page I had bookmarked. “Oh my god! ‘Does that tight pussy hurt when my fat cock stretches it out like this?’ Wow…”

His dark eyes meet yours and you squeeze them shut out of embarrassment, hiding your face with your hands.

”You like that shit, huh?” You can hear the amusement in his voice as steps forward, throwing the book down on the window seat. You want the ground to swallow you up when you feel him staring down at you.

You huff, removing your hands from your face. “Loads of people do, it’s just a book.”

“I mean, do you like that stuff? Guys talking to you like that in bed? Asking you if it hurts when they stretch you out on their cock?”

You laugh, he’s joking right? You look up at him and your mouth goes dry when you see his dark eyes, pupils blown wide with lust.

”I don’t know,” you shrug. “I haven’t been with anyone for a couple of years, I don’t really have the time.”

Noah looks taken aback at your words and his lips turn up into a smirk. “A pretty girl like you? Surely you have guys begging for a chance in every state we visit.”

You chortle, crossing your arms. “Unlike most guys, I don’t need sex.”

He scoffs, picking the book back up. “So you just read this casually?”

”Most of the time.”

”And the rest of the time?”

The hot flush returns to your cheeks, reaching the tips of your ears. “That’s none of your business.”

He starts to flick through the pages again, humming as he reads. “Can I take a guess?”

You roll your eyes. “Whatever, go ahead.” You throw yourself down onto the bed, sitting against the headboard as he paces, reading.

“I think you like this Corvin guy most, I can imagine you getting all hot and bothered when you read his parts and you can’t help but find yourself fingerfucking yourself in your bunk when everyone is asleep.” His head tilts when he stops to look at you, his eyes searching for the telltale signs of your arousal, grinning when he sees your thighs clench together. “Am I correct?”

You shake your head in disbelief. What’s his game and why is he trying to get under your skin over some book. Your underwear feels damp from the wetness that is pooling at your core from his words and you have to stop yourself from lunging at him, to either punch him or kiss him…you’re unsure which one would be more satisfying.

”C’mon Y/N, tell me.” He sits next to you, pointing at a section where the main character is riding Corvin. “Is this what you get off to?”

You feel all too hot and bothered with him sitting next to you with his shirt off, tattooed skin taunting you as he tries to coerce the secrets of your alone time out of you.

”If I wasn’t in here right now is that what you’d be doing? Getting off over your little dark romance book?”

”What’s your deal Noah? Why do you want to know about all this?” You sit up straighter and he lounges back, eyeing you humorously.

He shrugs. “It’s just cute that you read this horny stuff. I never took you as the type to get riled up by it, is all.”

”You’d be surprised.” You mumble and his eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

”You read worse?”

”Oh shut up, Noah. It’s just dumb fiction, why are we even still talking about this?”

He turns to his side, propping himself up on his elbow, eyes burning into the side of your head. “Because I can tell how hot and bothered you are right now and it’s kind of sexy, I must admit.”

You gulp at his words, staring straight ahead in a conscious effort not to look at him or all of your resolve might falter.

”So tell me, were you so pissed about having to share this room because you wanted some special alone time tonight with your little smut novel?”

You can feel his smirk and the tension in the room thickens, turning into a storm cloud of lust.

”You can still do it, you know.”

Your eyes finally dart to his smug face and your eyebrows furrow. “What?”

He shrugs casually. “You can still get yourself off, I could read to you if you want?”

Your swallow thickly, your core throbbing at his words. “No, that’s weird.”

Noah chuckles. “Masturbation isn’t we-“

”I fucking know that! What’s weird is you’re my boss and you’re offering to read to me while I make myself cum. Do you hear yourself?”

You can’t lie to yourself, the offer is almost too tempting. It’s not fair that the most attractive man you know is basically offering to help you get your rocks off but he hates you right? He’s always so moody and weird around you. Why is he being like this?

He sits up, scooting closer so your shoulders are touching and he leans close to your ear, his breath tickling the skin of your cheek. “Or I could tell you every wicked little fantasy I’ve had about you since you waltzed into the studio with Matt all those years back.’

Your eyebrows raise and you turn to him, his mouth just inches from yours. “You fantasise about me?”

He laughs, a smug sound that makes you want to punch him. “Oh yeah, my favourite is the one where I get to bend you over and rip apart those fishnets you love to wear, the ones with the lace flowers on.” His eyes darken as he reminisces over the lewd thoughts and your mind wanders.

How would it feel to have his hands all over you, tearing away those expensive tights that you adore? How would it feel to have him buried to the hilt inside you as he pushes your head into whatever surface he can find? Fuck its all too much.

”Noah, we shouldn’t talk about this stuff.” You try to reason with yourself but your resolve quickly disappears when his long inked finger trails up the bare skin of your thigh, stopping at the hem of your silky black pyjama shorts.

“Why? We’re both adults.” He smiles almost innocently.

”Because you don’t like me.”

He huffs out a laugh. “Since when? Didn’t I just tell you that I literally think about how I want to bend you over?”

You roll your eyes. “You literally talk to me like shit the majority of the time.”

”I like watching you squirm.” His smile is cocky and it only sends more electricity to your core because he’s right, he does make you squirm and you like it too.

A lust filled silence lingers in the air as he stares into your eyes, a smirk plastered on his lips.

”So do you still want to get yourself off, I’d love to watch.” He cocks an eyebrow and there it is, the last of your resolve leaving out the window.

”Fine.”

He’s like a kid in a candy shop when he sits up, watching you lie down on the bed. Your heart hammers in your chest as you close your eyes, trying to pretend he isn’t there. You slide the silk shorts down your legs, leaving the black lace thong on and your hand travels over the soft fabric, running over the damp patch that is only getting bigger.

You gasp when you slide your hand between the fabric, fingers slipping between your slick folds, easily finding the sensitive bundle of nerves that's been begging to be touched since you walked out of the bathroom to find Noah sprawled out shirtless on the bed. Oh how you wanted to just climb on top of him, to sink down on his cock like you owned him.

A quiet whimper escapes your lips when you circle your clit, slowly teasing yourself to the images of Noah’s cock buried deep inside your cunt. You feel him shift next to you to get a better look at your movements, how your fingers move under the dark lace of your panties. You hear him take a shaky breath and it sends shockwaves to your sensitive core.

“Does that feel good?” His voice is deep, coarse in your ear and you whine out a confirmation, moving your fingers faster over your clit. “God, you don’t know how good you sound. Do you like it when I talk to you?”

”Y-yes.” You sigh and he chuckles.

”Such a good girl.” He whispers, breath tickling your ear. “Do you want me to tell you what to do, huh? Do you want to be good for me and remove your underwear so I can see how you touch that pretty little pussy? God, I bet it’s so perfect.”

You whimper, using your spare hand to push the lace down your thighs, kicking them off as you toy with yourself. Noah leans forward, a hand landing on your thigh to pull your legs further apart and a feral groan leaves his throat when you spread yourself open for him to see just how wet you are, fingers covered in wet slick.

”Oh fuck, you look so good sweetheart. Show me how you bury those pretty fingers in there.”

You push two fingers into your core, the wet sound reaching your ears. You don’t think you’ve ever been this turned on in your life. You hear Noah’s breathing quicken as he watches you fuck yourself with your fingers, soft moans leaving your bitten lips.

”Doing so fucking well for me.” The praise feels like heaven when it meets your ears and you speed up, curling your fingers upwards. “Fuck, what I would do to bury my own fingers inside you.”

”Please.” You whine, opening your eyes to look at him, your breath coming out in pants when his lust blown eyes meet yours.

“Please what?” He smirks, tucking a piece of stray hair behind your ear as you find your clit again, rubbing your soaked fingers over the sensitive bud.

“I need your fingers inside me, please.” You’re so fucking needy and you can tell how much he gets off on it by how his smirk grows into a cruel grin and he holds his fingers against your plump lips.

”Are you gonna suck them for me? Get them nice and wet like the good little slut you are?” Your eyes roll back at his words and he gasps when your tongue swirls around the calloused pads of his fingers, soaking them with your saliva.

He pushes two long fingers into your warm mouth and you hollow your cheeks around them, staring up at him with innocent eyes that make his aching cock strain against his shorts. He pulls his fingers out with a pop and trails them down the valley of your clothed chest, down your navel to where your own fingers are still toying with your clit. Your eyes follow and your hand moves, giving him full access to where you need him most.

”You gonna watch me fuck you with my fingers huh?” He smiles sweetly, sliding his fingers up and down your drenched folds teasingly.

You nod, leaning up on your elbows to watch his slender fingers disappear between your folds, rubbing tight circles around your clit and you gasp his name, your mouth falling open at the immense pleasure. He chuckles, sliding them to your entrance to gather the wetness that pools there, moving back to your clit to play with it all too slowly.

”Please Noah.” You whine and he tuts.

”Be patient, I’ll get there. I want a better look.”

He moves to lie between your legs, pushing your legs further apart to get a good look at your glistening cunt. You can feel his breath hot against you and you could just cum right there without him even touching you, especially with how he looks up at you through those long lashes, eyes black and predatory like he wants to eat you whole.

“You’ve got such a perfect pussy, fuck.” He groans, pushes his long middle finger in, the dark ink disappearing inch by inch inside your cunt and you moan louder than expected, your hand flying to your mouth to keep yourself quiet. “Fuck, it feels so good, so soft.”

A second finger joins the first and he slowly curls them, finding that spot that leaves you seeing stars, your eyes rolling back, your head lolling back on your shoulders. His spare hand grips your inner thigh with a bruising hold and you're sure there will be bruises there tomorrow but you don’t mind, it feels like heaven.

”My mouth is so close to your pussy I can practically taste you.” He growls and your hips buck, pushing his fingers even deeper inside you. He chuckles darkly. “Do you want me to taste you?”

You sob, nodding enthusiastically.

”Use your words, pretty girl.” He hums, kissing your pelvic bone.

”Please taste me.”

He hums, his hot tongue dragging over your folds before his lips close around your clit, leaving you gobsmacked from how fucking good his tongue feels against you with his fingers fucking into you.

You’re close, you can feel that tightness building in your lower abdomen, so fucking close. His fingers curl faster, his tongue lapping over your clit like you’re the last water source on Earth and you’re falling. Your legs shake, a feral groan leaving your lips as your orgasm rips through your body like a fucking tornado. His fingers only move faster as his lips leave your sensitive clit and you're tipping over the edge again just as quickly, gushing around his fingers and the bed sheets below.

”Fuck, good girl!” He grins, lapping your sweet nectar from your thighs. “Think you’ve got another?”

You have no time to protest, he rises to slide between your thighs, fingers still buried deep inside your cunt as he stares down at you, curling them fast exactly where he knows he can drag another orgasm from you. His free hand covers your mouth when you cum again, screaming into his palm, soaking the front of his shorts where his leaking cock strains against them.

”Good fucking girl, well done!” He kisses your forehead, pulling his drenched hand away from your sensitive core to suck his fingers clean.

You stare at him in bewilderment when he smiles down at you. You’re in shock at how much you just came for a man you thought hated you half an hour ago.

”I think I need to catch you reading more.” He chuckles.

”Shut the fuck up.” You roll your eyes, pulling him into a searing kiss.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

“So you two didn’t kill each other last night?” Matt smirks when you make your way downstairs in the morning, wearing one of Noah’s shirts with him freshly showered following behind you.

Folio storms past, looking a little worse for wear. “I would’ve preferred it if they did, I need to bleach my ears.” He groans, pouring himself a mug of coffee.

You blush bright red, throwing a grape at the drummer and Noah wraps his arms around your torso, pulling you into his lap.

”Guess my plan worked then.” Matt chuckles, popping a grape in his mouth with a grin.

#noah sebastian fanfiction #noah sebastian #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian smut #bad omens band #bad omens #bad omens fic #bad omens cult #band fic #fanfiction

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beatificwrites · 7 months

Text

—you suck off sub!mike in his office ★

pairing: sub!mike schmidt x reader

content: porn w/o a plot, smut, no use of y/n, reader has grippable hair, oral male!receiving

“What’re you doing??” his brows furrowed at the feeling of your hand sliding into his inner thigh.

“Don’t mind me.” the corner of your lip curved up and your hand remained in place.

Mike’s doe eyes waltzed aimlessly around the TV monitor as he flicked through the noisy cameras. He was already tired of this stupid job.

Your fingers could not help themselves as they crept closer and closer to your boyfriend’s crotch. Once they had reached jackpot, your hand began to gently rub against his bulge.

A restrained moan slipped out from his mouth, “babe, not here. Not here…” he groaned as you gave him a soft squeeze.

“Pffffft!” you scoffed. “Nobody’s watching.” you proceeded to slowly fondle with his ever-growing bulge.

“Please, I can’t loose this job.” he begged as he clamped his hands on the arms of the chair, knuckles turning ivory white.

“Gosh, you’ve always been super sensitive.” you rolled your eyes and copped a light feel of his sack before unzipping his jeans.

You bit your lips unconsciously at the sight of his precum already seeping through his briefs. Your hand practically led itself up and down his hidden cock.

“Don’t tell me you’re gonna cream yourself already.” you snickered.

Mike frantically shook his head, but his flushed cheeks gave himself away.

“You need to relax, baby.”

You dropped to your knees and spread his legs further apart for better room. Your hand returned to gently rubbing against his shaft and your ears peaked up at the sound of him steadily sucking in the air through his teeth.

He began to feel your delicate kisses sprinkle all over his dick. He had no option, but to clench his fist to hold back from spilling all of himself too soon for your liking.

His huge eyes watched every move you made, anticipating the next. Ready to get high off of whatever treat you were about to give him.

You admired from below as the man above was spiraling out of control by the second. You had not even put him in your mouth and he was already about to come undone.

“I can’t relax like this-oh god!” he immediately threw his head back as he felt himself spring free and your hand gripping his length. Your touch was enough to send him to the stars.

You took a moment to ogle at his massiveness. You figured it shape-shifts and adjusts to it whatever state its in because your brain still couldn’t comprehend how such a thing could be supported by him all day long.

“Fuck..” he breathed out once your wet lips wrapped around his cock. He laid further back on the office chair and pulled his hoodie and shirt up just a bit.

Your tongue swirled around his tip, before you took it back out and lazily slipped your tongue up and down his length. You took your sweet time coating him in your slobber, testing his patience; your fave thing to do.

You rubbed his thickness with one hand and rested the other on his stomach, particularly his happy trail.

His mumbled curses came to an abrupt stop as soon as you started bobbing your head. With his mouth agape he threw his head back and you sucked as tenderly as you possibly could.

He reached out to guide your head, placing his coarse fingers through your hair. The urge to shove and move you, so you could suck at the pace he wanted you to, was strong. However, he knew he better.

You relinquished his cock for a moment. “grab as much as you want, sweetheart.” you breathed out.

His eyes widened a little, not expecting that from you. You gave a faint smile, deciding he could have his way with you for once.

He clasped a chunk of your hair not a millisecond later; not roughly, yet not gently either.

You hollowed your cheeks and blew twice as hard. “Jesus Christ!” he whined, through gritted teeth, as he pushed you further down. He was seconds away from spilling all of his load into your mouth.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck..I can’t hold it anymore!” he wailed.

His eyes rolled far back as he felt the intense wave of pleasure wash over his body. His cum spat out non-stop and you graciously took every drop he had to offer. The amount was too much to bare and it would drizzle down the corner of your lips.

You licked the salty stickiness from your bottom lip. Mike marveled, in his disheveled state, at the scene below him. You looked so beautiful right now despite the fact that you had just sucked him off.

You sprung off your knees and shared the taste with him.

“How you like that?” you titled your head as you rasped out.

“mehhh.” he answered with lidded eyes.

You giggled, “you’re so cute.”

───────── ☆

#reader included #reader insert #x reader #mike schmidt #mike fnaf #fnaf #fnaf imagines #mike smut #mike schimdt x reader #mike schimdt imagine #mike schimdt x fem!reader #sub!mike schimdt #smut #18+ content #five nights at freddy's #x gender neutral reader #gender neutral language #x gn reader #mike schimdt smut

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choke-me-joey · 2 years

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Can I get prompt 49 with Eddie?

Friends to lovers, reader and Eddie are stoned and she casually asks him “wanna fuck?”

My fave stoner metalhead fucks like a champ and we all know it 🥰

49. Wanna fuck?

Eddie Munson x reader

Content warning: 18+ content minors DNI, drug use (only weed it's chill), friends to lovers, bareback piv, oral (f receiving), Eddie talks too much, creampie, the usual filth

Hoe-vember masterlist

This was the definition of happiness. Sat in Eddie's living room on a Friday night, a large pizza devoured between you both, beers sipped, spliff smoked and Halloween playing on the Munson's tiny TV. Wayne was working a double tonight, and your parents were out of town for their anniversary, so you had moved in with your best friend for the weekend.

You were curled up in a ball on the couch, the high from the weed hitting you nicely. Eddie snickers from the other end of the couch.

"As if a butcher knife can hold up a body like that, man, I love this movie but that's fuckin' stupid." He rambles to himself before taking another sip of beer. You watch him from your end of the couch.

Eddie was your best friend in the entire world, the two of you having been inseparable since you were 7. Over the years you'd developed a crush on the long haired boy, which now, as you were both in your 20s, was running rampant 24/7. It didn't help that as you'd gotten older and hormones had reared their heads your friendship had become one of flirtatious jokes and banter, leading pretty much everyone to question why the fuck hadn't you gotten together yet?

You watch Eddie tilt his head back further to get the remaining dregs of his beer out of the bottle, and your eyes drag over that beautiful, beautiful neck of his, with that prominent vein and milky skin just begging to be marked up. Your mouth went dry and your head went all fuzzy. Your thighs squeezed together involuntarily to try and quell the throbbing between your legs. Fuck, why did you have to get so horny when you were high?!

Eddie stands up and stretches, his shirt riding up to expose a sliver of pale skin with a dark trail of hair leading into his pants and you swear you almost choked. God, you wanted to lick his stomach- was that weird? To kiss and lick that area below his belly button and follow the trail of hair down, down to his-

"Another beer, babe?" Eddie's slightly slurred voice cut you off and you quickly look away, acting as if you were studying the edge of blanket draped over your legs instead.

"S-sure." You squeaked clearing your throat. Eddie guffaws.

"Good stuff tonight, right? Rick really set me up good. Been impressed with my sales so let me have some of the finer grass."

You shoot him a sleepy eyed smile and nod, watching as he walks to the fridge and retrieves 2 more beers, cracking them open and returning back to the couch.

"Wanna fuck?" The words leave your mouth before your brain can even catch up and tell you what a stupid fucking idea it is.

Eddie eyes widen, and he dramatically spits out the mouthful of beer he'd just taken, coughing.

"W-what?!" He gasps, regaining his composure slightly, and a grin creeping across his stupid, dumbe, dorky, perfect face. "Seriously?!"

"Forget it." You mumble, cheeks flushing with embarrassment. "You're laughing at me."

"Y/N, I'm not laughing at you, I'm just...surprised, I guess? Shit, I've had a crush on you since forever, I mean, Jesus, how could I not? You're so...so fucking beautiful and smart and funny and I'm the town freak, y'know? Never thought you'd like me that way-" he cuts himself off. "-do you...like me that way? Or are you just bored and horny? Wait, fuck it, I don't care."

He scrambles over to your side of the couch and smashes his mouth to yours, kissing you with an energy you could only compare to that of when he is DM'ing, or playing on stage. You moan happily and wrap your arms around his neck, allowing you both to sink into the couch, Eddie's body moving completely on top of yours.

Eddie licks along your bottom lip and you open your mouth allowing his tongue to find yours. As the kiss grows more heated and sensual, you lift up your hips to grind against Eddie, and the friction from the prominent bulge in the front of his jeans has you moaning into his mouth.

"Shit, fuck, you're really fucking sexy, ya know that?" Eddie huffs out a laugh as you reach between you and palm him through his jeans. "Fuck, this is a dream, this can't be real-"

"Eddie, shut up," you giggle, pressing kisses to his cheek and jaw, ghosting over his neck. You lock eyes with him and flick open his belt and button on his jeans, dragging the zipper down and dipping your hand into his underwear, hand enclosing around his cock. Your pussy clenches at how thick he feels in your hand. "Shit, freak, you never told me you were packing."

"You never asked." Eddie smirks, and you stroke his cock slowly, making him groan loudly and drop his head to your shoulder. You smear the precum gathering on his head around with your thumb, and you swear you hear him whine against your neck. Your hand moves up and down his length slowly, making his hips buck into your hand. "Fuck, sweetheart, this is embarrassing but I won't last long if you carry on, been thinking about this for years-"

"Yeah? Been thinking about me jerking you off, Eds? About cumming all over my hand, or in my mouth?"

"Shit, babe, don't say shit like that, gonna make me blow my load way too early," Eddie pants, his face flushed. "Can I eat your pussy? Wanna taste you so bad."

"Fuck, yes, please." You nod and Eddie practically rips your pants and underwear off. He started transfixed and you feel yourself blushing. "Eddie..." You mumble, trying to scoot away. He grabs your hips and holds you in place.

"Ah, ah, ah, sweetheart, I'm committing this to memory, you're so fucking perfect." He spreads your legs, and practically salivates at the sight of your glistening pussy. "Shit, babe, look, she's fucking soaked. This all because of me?" He slowly runs a finger through your slick, circling your clit teasingly. Your back arches.

"Eddie! Shit, yes, always because of you, think about you all the time-" you whimper out, and your admission makes him blanch.

"Y-you do?" He asks quietly, and you nod.

"I'm not just bored, or high, or horny, Eds, always wanted you, always."

"Shit, we're a real pair of fucking idiots," Eddie chuckles, leaning down to capture your lips in a kiss. "You mean we could have been doing this for months, years even?!"

"M'sorry," you pout. "Didn't think you liked me that way."

"Oh baby, you don't have to worry about that anymore. M'not letting you go anywhere now, never make you doubt me again, okay?"

You nod and Eddie pecks your lips before trailing kisses down your stomach and then your thighs, deliberately avoiding your pussy. You whine, bucking your hips slightly and Eddie chuckles, pinning your hips down with his arm.

"Be patient, princess, hmm? Can you do that for me? Can you be a good girl?"

"Yes, yes, yes, Eddie, promise, I'll be so good for y-OU!" The last syllable comes out as a shout as Eddie licks from your hole to your clit, flicking it with with tongue.

"Shh, sweetheart, the whole trailer park is gonna hear you." Eddie smirks as he slips a finger into your pussy and you moan out his name. "Oh? You like that? You like the idea of everyone hearing what a naughty girl you're being, huh?"

"Eddieee!"

"Alright, alright, baby, can't wait any longer to taste you anyway." He nips your inner thigh, making your leg jerk. He snickers, the little shit, before making it up to you by placing a kiss on your clit, swiping his tongue over it. Your hands fly to his hair, tangling in his curls as he continues to work his tongue over your swollen clit, licking and sucking and moaning appreciatively as you tug on his hair. He slides another finger into you and curls them to find that spongy spot, and his fingers work in tandem with his tongue.

You swore the weed was making this more intense but maybe Eddie was just that good. Nobody had ever eaten your pussy like this before, not even close. Eddie had you on the edge within minutes, the coil in your belly ready to snap at any moment. Your legs were shaking and your head was spinning, the high from both pleasure and weed was making you feel as if you were floating.

"Fuck, Eddie, don't stop, don't stop baby, please, m'so close, gonna cum, y'gonna make me cum so hard!" You cry, and Eddie moves his fingers faster, not letting up on the incredible rhythm he had set with his tongue. Your orgasm hits you like a fucking freight train, your back sharply arching and your thighs clamping around his head as you cry out his name in a broken moan, your release gushing over his tongue and fingers, even his chin. Your vision goes white and you almost forget how to breathe normally.

"Holy shit, princess, that was a big one, huh? You still with me?" Eddie is grinning as he comes up to face you, your juices shining on his goofy face. You nod, pulling him in for a kiss, not minding the taste of yourself. His cock brushes over your pussy, making the both of you moan into the kiss. He breaks away, sitting up. "Condom."

"M'on the pill, Eds," you smile coyly at him and he closes his eyes, groaning.

"Fucking hell sweetheart, you want me to fuck you bareback? Fill you up with my cum?"

You nod eagerly and he climbs back on top of you, sitting back on his heels to take his shirt off. He then tugs at the bottom of your shirt and you sit up, allowing him to peel it off you and throw it to join his somewhere in the room. He groans at your simple black bra, and you grin at him as you reach behind you and unclasp it, letting your tits spill out.

"Jesus H Christ, I always knew you had a perfect rack but...shit, they're even better out the bra than in," Eddie practically growls, cupping your boobs in his hands and experimentally pinching your nipples. When you jolt and whine, he chuckles darkly. "Oh fuck, sensitive, huh?"

"Eddie, come on..." You buck your hips against him, his cock sliding perfectly against your wetness.

"Shit, alright, alright, I got you baby, lie back for me okay? You're not a virgin, right?"

"Eddie!" You snap. He already knows the answer.

He shushes you with another kiss as the head of his cock pushes in to your tight hole, the warm and wet of you making his brain feel like it was buzzing. A few more inches push in and you already feel so fucking stretched out. By the time he's got his entire length in you, you're wondering how the hell he's even going to move; you'd never been this full before.

"Shit, Eds, you're fucking huge, can feel you in my fucking stomach," you gasp and he snorts, placing a hand on your lower belly.

"Yeah? Can you feel me right-" he pulls out and pushes back in. "-here, yeah? Ooh fuck, I know you can, I can fucking see my cock, princess, so fucking deep in this perfect little pussy. You good? Want me to keep going?"

"Yes, yes, fuck, Eddie, fuck me till I can't fucking walk," you hiss. He plants his hands either side of your body on the couch and starts building up a rhythm, the trailer filled with the slap of skin against skin and squelches of your arousal. You bring your hands up onto his back, your nails digging into the skin, which only seems to spur him on.

"God, Y/N, this pussy was fucking made for my cock. Taking it so well, sweetheart, letting me fuck you so good-" Eddie grunts out as he fucks into you, shivering when your muscles clamp down on him. "Shit, baby, you keep doing that and this is gonna be over way too fast."

You're just about to open your mouth for a witty response when Eddie suddenly hikes up your legs over his shoulders. Your mouth drops open and your brows furrow. "Oh, shit, that's better isn't it, huh princess? Can see it on that beautiful face, you gonna cum for me again angel? Wanna feel you cum on my cock."

"Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, fuck, right there, right there!" You moan, clawing at the couch beneath you as your orgasm starts to build again. Eddie brings his thumb to your clit, rubbing at it harshly. The stimulation from his cock and his thumb is too much, deliciously so, and you cum, screaming his name as your pussy clamps down on his cock. He fucks you through it, cooing at you as you come down from your high.

"Look so fucking pretty when you cum, baby. Feels so good around my cock, shit, I'm getting close, you sure you want it inside?"

You lock your legs around his waist in response, and he lets out a breathless chuckle.

"You're gonna kill me, sweetheart."

"I hope not, I didn't get to blow you yet. Cum for me Eds, wanna feel you fill me up." You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him down for another kiss, moaning against his mouth as his thrusts speed up, chasing his high.

"Fuck, gonna cum baby, gonna cum, fuck, fuck, fuck!" Eddie slams his cock into you as deep as he possibly could once more, releasing rope after rope of cum inside you. He cums so much you feel it dripping out of you before he's even pulled out. The noise he lets out is beautiful; a broken moan paired with your name. Eddie drops down on top of you, his face buried in your neck. "Holy shit, I don't think I've ever cum so hard. This is it now, babe, your pussy is way too fuckin' good, you're stuck with me."

"I was kinda hoping that was the case anyway," you giggle as he lifts his face from your shoulder to look down at you, grinning like a fool.

"Yeah? You wanna be my girl?"

"I thought that was obvious."

"Babe, I'm high and also coming down from the best orgasm I've had in my life, you gotta be clear with me now." Eddie brushes his nose against yours, pecking your lips. "It's cool if you wanna keep this as a one time thing, or a fuck buddies thing-"

"Eddie, shut up." You grin, once more pulling him into a kiss.

#eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson smut #stranger things smut #eddie munson imagine #kats hoevember event #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x you

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veedyveen · 5 months

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there was this trend on twitter to draw your fave holding a pony like this pic of jesus holding a lamb and here is MY fave (daniel larusso) holding rainbow dash

#it was rly supposed to be your ponysona but i thought rainbow dash was more fitting #also i started this like a month ago!! this took me so long to finish (its bc i was not prioritizing finishing this….)#DANIEL LARUSSO MY BELOVED ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️#daniel larusso #ralph macchio #kk #tkk #karate kid #the karate kid #rainbow dash #my art

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acryliccassetteart · 18 days

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i saw this post from @jesus-holding-your-fave and thought it would be funny if jesus yeeted wheatley like a basketball

#i spent…. an embarrassingly long time on this stupid 2 panel comic #cassart #art #artists on tumblr #artwork #digital art #my art #original art #jesus christ #jesus #wheatley #portal #portal 2 #wheatley portal 2

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loveshotzz · 8 months

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Here’s a little preview of everyone’s favorite Tamagotchi Daddy 😚 and an appearance at the end by your fave bartender.

Whatta Man Masterlist | Rick’s Party Playlist

as a reminder my blog is 18 +

Sheer curtains sway with a pink glow from the flashing sign outside your apartment, the nip in the October air makes goosebump dance across your exposed skin from the crack in your bedroom window. The summer heat came and went like it always does but not the cute bouncer you took home the first warm night of the year.

Weckx-N-Effect’s ‘Rump Shaker’ spills through the boombox in your living room where Steve stands in front of your long mirror, dressed as John Dalton from Road House, you hear the pitch in his voice deepen,

“Take the biggest guy in the world, shatter his knee and he’ll drop like a stone.”

Rolling your eyes at the line you’ve heard both him and Patrick Swayze deliver all week long, you adjust the white and blue trimmed high waisted basketball shorts that hug your curves before tugging down the cropped Tune Squad mesh tank that matches. Straightening your bunny ears, you turn around to inspect your tail, bubble gum pink glossed lips turning up into a pleased smirk with the height the white platform sneakers on your feet give you. Humming in approval because you know Baby Spice would be proud, your shoulders wiggle in excitement as you apply another layer of gloss before smacking your lips loudly.

“Hey Doc, you got the goods earlier right?” The bouncer calls out.

His boots sound heavy on your shag rug making his way towards the bathroom and even though you saw his outfit earlier, when Steve’s handsome face appears next to yours in the mirror with a wide grin, you still flutter around nothing. Dark emerald eyes turn black as they drink in your costume, and you're almost positive yours look the same admiring the thick patch of hair on full display in his white loose fitting button up. Long sleeves rolled up to his elbows with the top three undone just like Dalton’s.

The extra button reveals more than usual, including the silver chain that dangles from his neck. It shines under the dark curls that cover his chest when it hits the bright lights above you, matching the belt buckle attached to the black leather that holds his tight fitting jeans to his waist. The ivory of his shirt makes his permanently sunkissed skin glow, thighs pressing together when he licks his full lips, moles moving with his cheeks when he grins.

“Jesus, you look - fuck, why’s the tail doing it for me?” Finally breaking character, he runs a hand through his hair, the ring wrapped around his middle finger catching your eye in his reflection.

“Stop calling me that or everyone is going to think I’m Bugs Bunny.” You huff and his lips twitch at your pout, “and if by goods you mean, the Roadhouse soundtrack, yes I picked it up from your friend Robin.”

Turning around, you lean against the sink, the reminder of your promise to recreate the sex scene with him tonight has you giving him an extra exaggerated roll of your eyes, a smile lighting up your face despite yourself. Steve’s big black boots cross the threshold, thick rubber soles squeaking against the rose colored tile, he closes the small distance to stand in front of you.

The warm smell of his Calvin Klein CK One cologne lingers fresh on the cotton of his shirt, along with the faint hint of your hairspray when he stole a spritz when he first got to your apartment. The cinnamon from his Big Red is hot on his breath, the whites of his teeth showing in a grin as he pushes the gum to the other side of his mouth with a tongue that was between your thighs just a few hours ago.

“I’m sorry baby, I’ll stop. I can’t help it when I’m in character you know?” One of his big hands comes up to your face, long fingers spreading across your jaw tilting your mouth towards his. The bouncer takes in your done up features in the light, and the pucker of your glittery lips, looking at him like you needed to be kissed. “No one is going to think a pretty thing like you is anything other than hot.”

“Good.” You try to say it with more conviction, but the way he keeps looking at you like he wants to eat you alive makes it come out quiet.

“Oh yeah?” He questions with a quirked brow, his boots moving the one step left to stand in the space you made for him between your legs. The tip of his nose runs along the bridge of yours, his other hand finding a new home on the plush curve of your hip to pull you even closer. The denim doing nothing to hide just how much your outfit was affecting him.

“I’m gonna have to follow you around all night aren’t I? Gonna make me abuse my power and kick anyone out who even looks at my girl like they got a chance huh?” Steve mutters his threat against your lips, the tips of his fingers digging into the dip in your cheeks bringing your mouth to his.

The strawberry of your gloss is sweeter than it was thirty minutes ago and it makes him groan when his kiss turns possessive, tongues meeting in the middle when he licks into your mouth. Your hands find their way to his chest, your palms finding the warm skin of his chest, the blunt ends of your nails dragging through the dark thatch of hair. He nips at your bottom lip when he lets you go. Pink glitter staining his when he pulls away sticky, eyes blown wide feeling the way your leg starts to lift over his hip, daring him to come back for more.

He tuts at you with whatever self control he has left, letting his hungry gaze drop down to drink up every dip and soft curve on display for him. Your back arches under the heat of it and Steve catches the puffy tail resting perfectly on the curve of your ass in the reflection. His responsibility to get downstairs in five minutes doesn’t seem so important anymore.

“I’m not going to be able to keep my hands off you.” He sounds almost angry, and pride swells in your chest.

His hand slides from your waist, fingertips tips dragging down the soft dough of your thigh making the hem of your shorts bunch up when he hooks them under your knee. He accepts your dare with a roll of his hips, his grin turning salacious when you gasp.

“That’s kinda the point, duh” the giggle that leaves your mouth is breathy as he ducks his head down to the crook of your neck to suck a fresh bruise where the previous one he left last week is almost healed, “oh my godddd.”

His lips curve against you, the hint of stubble along his jaw tickles as he makes his way with greedy lips to all the sensitive spots he’s discovered over the last few months, including the new one he found the other night right below your ear. He nips at the soft skin when your fingers tangle themselves into his hair with a harsh tug at his roots, the back of your calf pressing against his ass encouraging him more.

“Earlier wasn’t enough, my girl needs more attention doesn’t she?” His taunting comes out next to the shell of your ear, the deep baritone making you shiver. “It’s only been a few hours and you want me that bad again, huh?”

Your eyes hit the back of your head when he rolls your earlobe between his teeth. Another tug to his hair, a whine pushing past your pink lips trying to get more of anything he’ll give you.

“Come on baby, don’t be shy.” He hums pulling away from your neck, finally letting go of your face to squeeze at the fat of your ass propped on the sink, long fingers playing with your tail. “Tell me, I wanna hear it.”

The song on the radio changes, and Mase’s ‘What You Want’ encourages the next grind of your hips.

“Gonna make me beg for it Steve?” You pout looking up at him from under your lashes, relishing in the way you feel him twitch in his jeans at the thought. One of your hands trails down the muscles of his stomach, biting your lip when they twitch under your fingertips, adding more to the growing problem in your underwear.

The incessant high pitch beeping of both your tamagotchi’s cuts through the tension like a knife, making both of you freeze and you catch the way his eyes widen, the color coming back at the realization of their need to be fed.

“Steve, I swear to god-“ Your disbelief is quickly cut off by the bellowing voice of a certain bartender from outside your window.

“Hey! Asshole! I know you’re up there. Get your dick in your pants and get down here and help! It’s fucking Halloween!”

Eddie sounds like he’s already at his wits end, and you swear you hear him say ‘before I fuckin’ kill Rick’ as the bar door creaks open before slamming shut behind him.

#my writing #whatta man #steve harrington #steve harrington smut #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington x reader smut #steve harrington oneshot #steve harrington fanfiction #steve harrington imagines #bouncer!steve

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jesus-holding-your-fave · 2 days

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perhaps a c!tommyinnit?

sigh

Today, Jesus is holding:

Tommyinnit from the Dream SMP

#IM A FORMER DSMP FAN OK #THAT SIGH IS NOT ONE OF MALEVOLENCE #I JUST REMEMBER MY BLOCK PEOPLE DAYS #also yes i’m tagging this as dsmp because that’s the version i’m using #gimmick blog #jesus holding your fave #tommyinnit #dsmp

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vestaclinicpod · 2 months

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Audio Drama Sunday - 21st April ✨

Here are the shows which got me through a particularly heavy set of night shifts! 😌

👻 @tellnotalespod (S2E78) The music in this episode was so sad 😭. Of COURSE Frank hadn’t considered the emotional nature of the tether in his research. Jesus 🙄. Leo needs to start running this show ASAP.

🌲 @hellofromthehallowoods (148) I’m absolutely obsessed with Buck’s glow up. Honestly, goals. What an interesting cast of characters we have aboard this ship, I can’t wait to spend more time with them. Dashiell reporting to have never met Valerie snuffs out one of my early theories … unless he’s lying! I’m so scared for Shelby and Clem! The action writing has always been amazing in this show but the TENSION this season. I can’t cope. Also, that body at the end! A reference to the circle of fifths?? I’m gonna get emotionally wrecked by the murderer reveal, I can already tell.

🧳 Travelling Light @monstrousproductions (18) oh these Augurians are so lovely and mystical but I was hit by a wave of sadness thinking about one old soul whose aviary is down to one single bird companion and then getting the prophecy of when it will die 🥺 But my sad thoughts were soon drowned out by the 🚨HOLDING HANDS ALARM🚨. Good grief, they’re bloody adorable.

🎙️WTNV (246) I’m so glad we actually got to hear this story!! I couldn’t agree more, Abby, it is not incomprehensible that two living people could haunt each other. I’m reminded of a fave Everything Everything lyric ‘if he’s dead, he’s not a deadbeat dad’…. you feel me?

🏛 @the-mistholme-museum (ERASED) oh, boy, I sure hope this episode title is just a fun word which begins with E and not a reference to what’s happened with HoResearch! Anyone down to make a petition for one more season where the guide just talks to itself? It’s so cute!!

🖥️ The Magnus Protocol (12) oh god, I bloody hate mascots/clowns and this is not helping at all….

🍎 @notquitedeadpod (XXXVI) I don’t like listening to Alfie cry 😭 forgive me, but I’m mentally not ready to give up on the idea of Cas coming back. I believe that Haley believes in what she’s telling Alfie but I’m also like… babes, you maybe want to ask your consultant about that? I need to relisten with a notepad or something to get this new biology lore down because it’s so interesting!!

I’m thinking about starting Hi Nay or Small Victories this week, I’ve heard such good things about both of them! If you have a particular fave or if there’s a show you think I’d prefer more - let me know!!

#tell no tales #hfth spoilers #the mistholme museum of mystery morbidity and mortality #travelling light #wtnv #tmagp spoilers #not quite dead #audio drama sunday #small victories #hi nay

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jeons-catalyst · 12 days

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https://www.tumblr.com/jeons-catalyst/751502994518966272/the-main-difference-i-saw-stfu-you-didnt?source=share

The main thing here is we talk about these two ships as if there's something to compare here just because they're both technically the 'big' ships in BTS but the truth is there is not a single thing that taekook have done in 12 years that is something friends wouldn't do together. Sharing cars, hanging out together, visiting each other, joking around with each other, asking for help with music, posting eo on social media - like what do you guys do with your friends if not this? Vmin are out here wearing matching items, having crazy skinship, Jimin has Tae's dad's number and is apparently friendly with his family, Tae posts sappy posts with Jimin (hands together I only have you...jesus), when Tae is distressed in a group setting the one he reaches out to is Jimin - but somehow none of us think they're together right? Taekook is just held together by mistranslations, unverifiable stories and the wishes of fans who want to see two hot guys together. Why else is shipping such a thing in the kpop community? Its not because all these people love supporting their fave idols dating and being in happy relationships because that's not the reaction when their actual dating "scandals" break out.

And this is the same standard I hold for jikook which is why I will not say with complete certainty that jikook are together either. Cooking for the other person after a concert, being inordinately excited to see the other online, having cheesy sayings like you are me I am you, spending hours watching the others content, constantly doing projects together like collabs or the travel show, always being stuck together backstage or hanging out in each others rooms all the time, having a million inside jokes, paying them extra attention because they're your favourite person, spending each others birthdays together, making Tiktok comments on the others videos, even enlisting together - theyre very sweet! But still things I'd do with my friend (except enlisting, doing collabs etc)

The thing about jikook - the things that really make me pause is those odd out of place things that happen sometimes and I can ignore a few things here and there but in cumulation - yeah I side eye them sometimes. It just pulls me out sometimes and makes me second guess their friendship. The hickey - that was a weird thing. The rose bowl thing - let's write it off by saying Jimin and Jungkook do bite their friends sometimes even though this seemed distinctly off. GCF Tokyo - I dunno JK has made so many gcfs post Tokyo and yet that intimate atmosphere from gcft is just...a little too romantic for me (I'm ignoring the whole it was a birthday present paid for by JK aspect of it because technically I guess you could pay for your friend but...). Jimin's roundtrip back to Korea just to be there for JK's birthday - ok we know Jimin is not averse to taking international trips just to support his friends but doing that in between his hectic holiday schedule with a trip before and after JK's birthday is so.... JK's thirst trap birthday greeting - nah sorry this was again really odd to me and it's strange that nobody in the fandom clocks this as odd - JK could drop a thousand thirst traps every day if he wanted, to specifically do so in a birthday greeting to Jimin - for what?? What was that? And this is super controversial even among jikookers but JK's tattoo - the idea that JK (who btw always calls himself JK) managed to put his initial above the M on his ring finger as if his entire rest of his hand does not exist and it never ever occurred to him that hey that looks a lot like JM which omg coincidence is also the initials my bandmate and good friend Jimin is known for and not me - I mean if it wasn't deliberate then that would really make me question JK's visual intelligence (and nobody say mijoo to me because that J isn't under M either)

And one of these things being off is fine - like who knows what context we're missing. Maybe their physical and emotional boundaries are so different from mine. But all of these things + all the other smaller things we ignore all the time - again I'm not saying they're together. I'm just saying I can see why some people including me do a double take after seeing all this. There's no other "ship" in BTS that has this history of consistent wtf-ery happening in the background over so many years. The rest of them all have a very special and intimate friendship with each other. And Jimin and Jungkook are...Jimin and Jungkook whatever that entails

Anon, i literally don’t have anything to add because you have literally said it all.

In all the years of BTS being together as a group, i honestly cannot say there is a single thing i have seen taekook do for or with each other which made me do double take especially when you understand their dynamic. Everything they do and have done is what friends do with each other and what they do with other friends as well and for people who don’t see this, i really wonder what kind of friendships they have in their lives and what they do with their friends.

Jikook on the other hand is a whole mystery. Those two are sus through and through and even when they are not trying to be, they are still sus. Their consistency and exclusivity is what does it for me and just like you, i cannot swear that they are together but they sure do have an interesting relationship.

#jimin #jungkook #jikook #jikook blog #taekook

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xanyiaz · 2 months

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pov me at 1:30am after just listening to fooliverse james: what drugs did erik lace in this au (pun intended) bc the hold it has on me is INSANE LIKE ITS SO FUCKING GOOD IM SCREAMING ILL JUMP OFF A CLIFF THAT JAMES AUDIO HOLY FUCKING SHIT I MEAN GAVINS ONE OF MY FAVES BUT ???- I ACTUALLY THINK I PREFERRED THAT OVER GAVINS WHICH IS SAYING A LOT ??? LIKE IT WAS SO SURREAL TO LISTEN TO I FELT LIKE I WAS LEVITATING ?? IT WAS LIKE AN OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE SOMEHOW ?? I LOVE TELEPATHY AUDIOS LIKE THIS- BUT ESPECIALLY THIS ONE BC THE WAY HE WAS BOUNCING AROUND IN YOUR EARS ??? MM MMMM AND THE KISSING PART GOOD LORD ON JESUS MOTHER OF CHRIST IM- THAT ACTUALLY IMGJFHFJDBFJFJFJ THE KISSING PART. IM GJEJFJ I CANT FUCKING DO THIS GOOD NIGHT

(i kept thinking about him and was somehow aware of him in all of my dreams as well) (he is climbing the ladder up to my fav characters very quickly help) (i won't make it through this au without spontaneously combusting)

pov literally me:

#redacted audio #redacted asmr #redactedverse #redacted verse #redacted fandom #redacted james #redacted project meridian #fooliverse #redacted april fooliverse #redacted april fools #redacted fooliverse #redacted au #redacted telepaths #redacted audio james #redacted asmr james

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hamsterclaw · 2 years

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Freak on a bike

He doesn't know what the hell he's doing, this big dumb guy.

Inspired by RM in the mv for Sexy Nukim. Happy birthday week RM! I’m sorry.

Pairing: RM x F! reader

Genre: Smut

Rating: 18+

Word count: 2k

Warnings: Explicit sex, a fuckton of swearing, referenced drug use, objectification and dumbification of our fave sexy genius

Tagging: @sahmfanficbts @reliablemittenmain @vyduan

A bike bell rings and you look up to see where it’s coming from.

A bike stops a few feet away from you. On it, a guy in a black suit.

You eye him curiously. He’s not bad looking, pretty sharp compared to the other guys you do business with.

His thighs sandwich the bike frame, both feet on the ground.

He reaches into the wire basket and holds out a package to you.

You look around.

What is this guy, some kind of fucking amateur?

‘You a narc?’ you ask, not moving from the railing you’re leaning against.

‘What?’ he asks, voice deeper than you were expecting.

‘Said what the fuck is that?’ you ask.

You glance around again, half-thinking you’re being set up because there’s no fucking way the Kangs, drug overlords of Asan, sent this dumb goon to drop a package to you.

Have they been snorting their own low quality shit?

‘My first day,’ he says, like that’s gonna help redeem his big dumb self.

‘I’m supposed to be ok with you and your fucking training wheels?’ You shoot a glance at his chest, straining against his white shirt. ‘And your fucking training bra?’

He puts a hand over his chest. Big, like the rest of him.

‘I’m not wearing a bra,’ he says, hurt.

‘I’m not taking you shopping for one, baby girl,’’ you retort. You wave a hand. ‘Here, gimme that shit.’

You slip him the packet you’re meant to give him in return and put his package in your bag.

‘Go back to wherever the fuck you came from,’ you say, dismissive. ‘Next time don’t ring that damn bell. You trying to call attention to us?’

You watch him cycle away. You’re not expecting to see him again, dumb goon will probably get himself killed before too long.

***

You’re on your phone, deciding what the fuck you want for dinner tonight when you hear the bike approach.

It stops inches from your foot.

You look up, and up a little more, because this guy is unfeasibly big.

‘Still alive, huh,’ you say, somewhat impressed.

It’s been two weeks since you saw him last, this big dumb guy. He’s wearing the same black suit he was wearing him last time, only this time he’s got rings on his fingers.

You give him points for style, he looks good for someone who’s a short step away from getting done by the po po.

‘Hey,’ he says, voice warm, like you’re friends or some shit.

He leans forward a little, loses his balance a bit, and the bike slips forward. You get your foot out the way just in time.

Man’s a clumsy bitch.

‘Got something for me big guy?’ you ask, raising an eyebrow, doing that face that makes these dumb gangster boys want to slap you and fuck you, in that order.

‘My name’s RM,’ he says.

‘Good for you, baby,’ you say, dry as fuck.

He passes you his package and takes your packet in return, slipping it into the inside pocket of his jacket.

‘What’s your name?’ he asks.

‘Don’t worry your big dumb head about my name,’ you say.

He grins at you.

Jesus, this big dumb baby has dimples, cute. Like an actual baby.

You want to poke your finger into one.

‘Go home, big guy.’

He shoots you another look as he pedals away, big legs working the pedals, trousers straining against his thick thighs.

This fucking guy.

***

The next drop, he doesn’t ring his damn bell or try to run over your foot.

‘Why you always dressed like you going to prom?’ you mutter, passing him your packet.

He dimples at you. ‘Wanna be my date?’

‘I don’t date chum,’ you say, scathing.

His dimples deepen.

‘Why do you keep staring at my thighs if you don’t wanna ride them?’ he asks.

You stop and look up at him.

‘Stop towering over me, you goon,’ you say. ‘How’m I supposed to talk to a fucking skyscraper?’

‘I’m just saying there’s room,’ he says, smirk on his face. ‘If you want a ride.’

You don’t say yes, but you can’t bring yourself to say no, either.

‘Hey,’ you call after him. ‘Take the underpass. Cops were all over the main road earlier, a stabbing or some shit.’

He nods, thighs flexing as he accelerates. He rings his bell once, and then he’s off, swallowed by the dark.

***

You’re picking out sweets at the store, trying to decide on a lollipop flavour (colour?) when he walks up to you.

‘I like cherry,’ he says.

‘Didn’t ask,’ you reply, snide. You look up.

Damn, this guy.

He’s got his suit jacket slung over his shoulder, white shirt unbuttoned so far you can almost see his tits.

‘Don’t put your tits in my face, poke my eye out,’ you complain.

He acts like it wasn’t him who didn’t do his own buttons up.

He pays for your sweets, buys himself pop.

‘Let me taste,’ he says, pointing his chin at your lollipop.

You look at him and lick around your lollipop.

He watches, avid, like he’s imagining you doing the same to his cock.

You pass it to him.

His tongue flicks out and now you’re the one letting your imagination run away with you.

His arms and chest stretch that shirt out so nice.

He tilts your chin up, rolls the lollipop over your lower lip, coating it in sweet.

You blink up at him, open mouthed.

He has to lean down a lot to kiss you but he acts like it’s no big deal.

You guess he’s always been a big man.

His hand cups the back of your head, tilting your face so he can kiss you deep, taste the cherry flavour even though it’s almost gone.

You swallow, and he hums.

Then he’s pulling away, slipping the lollipop through the ‘o’ of your lips.

You blink, and then he’s no longer touching you.

‘See you next week, pretty girl.’

***

You’re thinking of the big dumb goon who kisses like he’s got the dick game to back it up.

Like he can take his time with you, slow.

RM, he’d said his name was.

Speak of the devil.

He rolls up next to you on his bike, and you exchange packages so seamlessly it’s like you practiced it.

‘Hey,’ you say, holding out your hand. ‘Got this for you.’

He’s looking at your tits when he should be looking at your hand clasped in front of them, the dumbass.

He tilts his head. ‘Yeah?’

You reach out and clip the Hello Kitty light you picked up to his wire basket.

‘There. You can see where you’re going now.’

He looks at it for a moment, then he smiles. You can see the dimple flash in his cheek.

‘Cute. Like your ass,’ he says. He reaches into his pocket.

‘I got something for you too.’

You think he’s gonna say his dick, he seems like that kind of guy.

He pulls out a lollipop, unwraps it with his teeth, hands it to you.

‘Suck it for me,’ he says.

You pop it in your mouth, a sweet cherry burst on your tongue.

‘You want me to suck it for you?’ you ask, teasing.

‘Yeah.’

He shifts a little on his bike. You stare at the bulge of his cock as you suck.

‘Damn.’

He leans close, lips about to touch yours, when you hear a ‘hey!’

You pull him close, pull his big body over yours. His arms wrap around you, his hips cage you against the railing.

You lick your tongue into his mouth because you can, and then you turn to the cop who’s shouted.

‘Yeah?’ you say, like you’re bored when actually, you’re fucking thrilled because your big goon feels like he’s got a big dick to back himself.

He’s not even fully hard and he feels like he could break you.

What a fucking way to go, impaled on your big goon’s monster cock.

‘Let’s go, baby,’ he says.

He pats the back of his bike saddle, and you realise there’s space for you behind him.

You hop on, and he puts those thick thighs to good use, pumping the pedals like pistons, carrying the both of you away on his dumb bike.

***

He looks pretty fucking good under you as you wriggle your ass in his lap.

You’ve got your hand in his thick fucking hair, tugging his head back.

His hard on’s trapped in his pants, you’re riding the ridge of it and he’s so hard and thick your clit’s in heaven.

You’re right there with her, your big dumb sexy goon’s gonna make you cream just with the promise of how big he is.

You gasp, bite down on his lip, and he says, shit, fuck, you gonna cum, already?

You’re most of the way there. His mouth on your tit makes the pleasure explode. He sucks like he wants to milk you dry.

Who knew this guy was so clever with his tongue?

You aren’t ashamed to say you need more.

‘Show me your dick,’ you pant.

He unzips, yanks all that shit down, and you could cry.

He’s so big he could split you in half, cock standing straight up, pre-cum sticky on his head.

You want to suck him like those cherry lollipops he buys you but you can’t fit all of him in.

You want him to stretch you everywhere.

You almost cream again when he slaps his dick on your cheek.

You’re pathetic, whiny, needy for his cock.

‘Come on,’ he grunts. ‘Let me stretch you, s’not gonna fit otherwise.’

He works two fingers into you, and you ride his hand like it’s fucking Magic Mountain.

He says, ‘fuck,’ and he grabs your ass, tight.

He works another finger into you, fingering you hard, fast.

He flattens you on his stupid ass futon and still you spread your legs because you’re gonna take this man or die trying.

Death by dick.

He’s spurting pre-cum now, groaning as he rolls the condom on.

How’d he find one big enough?

He dribbles spit onto your pussy, even though you’re plenty wet, you can hear yourself.

He pushes the head of his cock against your cunt.

He’s so big it stings. You’re trying to take him, breathing out slow.

He’s holding still, you can’t tell if there’s more stretch to come or not.

‘You in, baby?’ you ask.

‘Just the tip,’ he says, he sounds strained.

You lift your hips, trying to take more of him.

‘Fuck.’

He pushes in a bit more, a bit more, a bit more and then he’s all the way in, so deep you can feel his dick on the back of your throat it feels like.

There’s so much pressure, your pussy feels so fucking full of his cock.

He nudges in a little more.

‘There you go, take it, baby,’ he groans. ‘Fucking take it.’

Your clit’s throbbing, your cunt putting out more juices to ease the slide.

He flicks your nipples, tugging, cupping handfuls of your tits, acting like they were made for his entertainment.

He pulls back and thrusts again.

‘S’good,’ you slur, but really you have no idea what the fuck you’re saying.

All you know is he’s fucking you just right and this big beautiful dimpled goon’s gonna make you squirt all over him.

He probably makes girls squirt all the time, packing what he’s packing.

You’re breathless as he pistons into you, you can hear yourself gasping.

‘There,’ he grunts. ‘Make me wet, pretty girl.’

He grabs your tit, squeezing as he speeds up.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

You scream as you gush all over him, you’re too fucking loud but your man doesn’t give a shit.

‘Yeah, fuck,’ he groans, deep.

He pulls out, rips off the condom, stroking himself fast, hard.

Your mouth is open from your orgasm, he takes it as an invitation to cum, spurting his spunk all over your tongue, your bottom lip.

His aim is shit.

Cum drips over your tits, you don’t hate it, especially when he puts his big hand in it and spreads it over your tits.

He falls asleep on you.

You’d kinda known you’d like the weight of him.

***

You wake up to him wiping a damp cloth over your tits.

‘Made a mess,’ he says, tongue in his cheek, the big dumb baby.

‘Do it again,’ you say.

‘Yeah,’ he says. ‘Now?’

He’s hard again, you can feel him like a third leg against your cunt.

‘Yeah, now.’

‘Wait,’ he says. ‘What’s your name?’

‘Make me breakfast in the morning and I’ll tell you.’

‘Yeah, ok,’ he promises. ‘You like eggs?’

#rm x reader #rm smut #namjoon x reader #namjoon smut #bts smut #btscarnivalnet

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gizkasparadise · 5 months

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What is the worst, most technically inept drama that you secretly love? Tell us of the best badgood drama, the clunkiest dialogue, the most inexplicable casting, the hideously costumed yet most fun dramas, please.

🫥Anonymously yours🫥,

💜Purplehanfu😈💜🍇👾

dear complete stranger (<3),

man i love badgood dramas so much!!! i chose ones that are flatout objectively not good, but i was glued for them all. here's a few that are jumping out

triad princess (taiwan). it ends on a cliffhanger that will never be continued, the relationship building is non-existent, jasper liu basically plays himself yet still acts like he's doing a community service project, but omg it's cute and hit all the right notes for me. fave bonus is that one of the gangster henchmen falls in love with the FL's best friend, a shy boy who works at a mart and makes youtube covers

hold on, my lady (chinese). a bandit is offered a choice when she's caught during a heist: be executed or marry this aloof but beautiful but delicate son of the general. she chooses the latter, and hijinks ensue. made on a budget of pocket lint and just wacky, im going to rewatch this today, actually. fave bonus moment: the FL falls dramatically down and the ML breaks both his arms instantly when he tries to catch her

thumping spike & thumping spike 2 (korean). the two are barely related, but both deal with a competitive men's volleyball team! thumping spike 1 is about a washed up competitive female player going to coach a high school team to glory (just dont...think too critically about the age difference, there) and the second is COLLEGE EDITION with a love quadrangle between two identical twins, one of whom is a cheerleader for the team, the ace volleyball player who's too cool for school, and the WILDCARD volleyball player who gets mad when people call him gorilla. the second one is definitely worse than the first one, but neither are bringing home awards. i still watched them both in one sitting.

my heart twinkle twinkle (korean). this show is actually insane and a parade of toxic that i can never, in good conscience, ever rec to anyone. but gd did i watch the whole fucking thing. look at this fucking poster. this fucking poster looks like it was doused by a fake snow machine.

premise: Noble But Poor family has 3 daughters: the eldest, who is the caretaker; the middle who is Aloof and Ambitious; and the youngest who is A Fucking Menace. they are lead by their single father, who owns a fried chicken store

Rich but Dysfunctional family also has 3 children: the eldest, who is the only son and a fucking piece of work, the middle who is school colleagues with the other family's middle daughter and a hot mess who loves Da Club, and the youngest, who is clingy and gets into a ton of fights with the other family's youngest but is otherwise ok. they run AN EVIL FRIED CHICKEN FRANCHISE that is poisoning people through subpar ingredients!!

there's so much that's so wrong with this, im going to bullet point it from another post i made:

the entire premise is that there’s a fried chicken restaurant rivalry between two families but somehow there’s murder and slush funds and this guy who owns a string of fried chicken franchises named after himself (yeah) has direct access to seoul’s police commissioner at any given moment

one of the main actresses was involved in a scandal a little over halfway through production so they just….vanish her character/entire plotline like it never happened

the main male lead is toxic personified. him and li chengyin from goodbye my princess could co-author a dating strategy/forced-marriage-after-you-kill-your-girlfriend’s-head-of-household book because jesus christ. he literally screams that he hates women and he ends the drama (rightfully!!) in fucking prison

the second female lead disappears/creates a new identity and becomes a chicken chef student of the world. shes later in a love triangle between a single dad chicken shop interior designer and another vanilla guy

that's right, one guy’s job is he’s an architect for chicken restaurant interiors i cant

the main male lead leaves the main female lead’s father to die in a chicken-coop-themed arsony and then cha-cha slides into the son-in-law’s role during the father’s funeral and later MARRIES the female lead

the main male lead tells the female lead’s father’s grave that HE WON AND DAD LOST because the male lead is standing and the father’s in the dirt?!

a friend/almost!love interest of the second female lead dies tragically in a chicken delivery motorcycle chase????

it's the worst drama i've ever seen. i watched all of it.

kakafukaka (japanese)

this one is so gd weird and unappealing it somehow circled back around and became off-puttingly charming to me? so the premise is that there's a 20something year old woman whose life has gone to shit and she ends up in a sharehome with the most sexually dysfunctional bunch of people in the world. one of these is her ex, who tells her that she's the only one he can get a boner with (yeah) and asks her to help him get over his impotence in order to write his novel (yeah). if you read the whole show as kind of an exploration into sex without romance/love, it's as not bad, and there's something weirdly endearing about everyone--i really love the second female lead akari in particular. but it's not a good show, not by a long shot (MDL rating? 6.6), and the ship is dysfunctional at the very best. the ost somehow is great though?

youtube

speaking of trash dramas with great OSTs, love in sadness has some of my favorite songs:

youtube

okay that's enough for now!!!!

#asks!#kdrama #cdrama #jdrama #triad princess #hold on my lady #kakafukaka #my heart twinkle twinkle #thumping spike #long post

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swords-of-a-soilder · 4 months

Text

Remove Problematic CCs

Section 2

"The Qsmp is problematic"

So fun fact twitter hates this fandom and everything it stands for, I'm not kidding when I say the amount of people I saw calling the fandom, toxic, racist, misgontic and ableist is interesting to say the least.

So of course when the SulhasSpace issue happened some people ran with it as proof that the fandom is the problem. Now I've show you guys an racist account before in the last account of interest (burnbook Qsmp) So I'm not here to pretend it's not a problem, it absolutely is.

So yes I get where these are coming from to some degree but Twitter doesn't forgive or forget, and there's of course the fact that not ever "fan" is actually a fan.

That being said they are two sides to Qsmp twitter right now,

1)Chill fun time, drawing your faves.

2)your faves are problematic and if you don't push for them to be kick out your a terrible person.

A common discussion I see on the twitter is often, "oh you're defending your faves, you call out any creator but your faves" completely ingoring the fact that most the stuff their holding said faves accountable for are ages old.

They call us parasocial but then make post after post advocating for members to be removed from the SMP, it's making rounds, so I want to clear any misinformation on Twitter and make it clear when creators apologize.

I bring you back to this tweet (please don't even interact with this person Thank you.)

You might remember them from the bonus section, this was posted jan 5 2024 with 1.3K likes (Jesus) so allow me to clear the air on some accusations.

In the reply of this they link a thread stating all problematic behaviors of creators, however MAJORITY of the this thread is just attacking the fan base I'm not even kidding.

Here's the thing, the bad apples aren't the fandom, it was this same behavior that had people attack dsmp fans.

Say what you want about Dream but you can acknowledge the dsmp fandom got so much hate for simply existing because a few of them were bad.

Because as someone who's been in both, and left both oddly who was previously a full on dream Stan and just sorta grew out of him. People hated us just for liking the dsmp.

They attacked minors in cosplay called us fatherless and cringe (and like yeah but still) overall make fun of Nurodiverst kids for having hyperfixations, and their justification was we're all terrible people.

Here's my thing, you don't actually care, you don't care about the alleged victims or the people who's lives are at risk; You want to make the fandom look bad.

You could have easily said "A person on twitter told another they hope the us gets bomb" and yeah I understand it was in the context of the Qsmp but people are not their interset, don't water people down to the things they like, then you're just making stereotypes.

How is it any different than saying, "a kpop stan did this, a furry did that,"

Also while I'm on this compersion of both I've noticed a constant conflict in regards to the Forever situation vs Dream situation with the parties on either side the other cc is guilty but theirs isn't.

I noticed this as soon as the accusations dropped actually a lot of people even here on Tumblr, where saying "this is what we deserved" and at "least dream didn't actually do it"

Tô be honest I noticed the fandom was at odds before that even, they were sudden talk here on Tumblr which means the topic likely came from Twitter of the dsmp compered to the Qsmp.

And I'll be honest dsmp was getting dragged, I read these thinking, 'why are we comparing them, they're clearly different with their own stories.' I still wonder that.

I don't want to fight with dream SMP fans, I use to be one of you , I had a freaking fan fic plan that was just c:! ranboo getting teleported into the Qsmp.

Why don't have to fight, but I guess with dream being unlikable, that makes things very hard.

Anyways I'm getting of track, when this person does have a important Calm it's often.. wrong

Ok no, to both of these.

1) she was not the only woman on the server, Jaiden joined the server at the very beginning, so unless I miss an noticed that Jaiden actually used macs pronounces that's a fuckin lie.

You can see Jaiden right there behind Foolish, on the very first day. This isn't hard to confirm, it doesn't even take a second.

I read the tweet and immediately went, nah that's not true I remember Jaiden, And what do you know Jaiden was in fact a member at that time.

(looking at this image gives me so much Nostalgia omg..)

2) she was not the only one being harassed, in fact they literally contradict their own statement with proof bad was receiving hate at the same time

Political lore, as in election season? I mean it must be I can't think of another political Qsmp event that bad was involved it huh crazy but If thats the case then Baghera wasn't the only one receiving hate thats... that's crazy, you're crazy.

Non of the tweets that screenshot are misogynistic, it's just people who believe the dream accusations criticing her attendance to his concert.

Also let me be clear real quick, I am AFAB in fact tmi I haven't even gotten on T, it's difficult to here and I'm afraid of getting hate crimed.

So I understand misgony, I live it, this is not what this is; Criticizing a woman isn't inherently misgony.

When you guys said "Qsmp had a misgony problem," is that what you guys meant, a woman gets hate and it's automatically misgony and not a section of the fandom being toxic..? Ok

#qsmp #qsmp investigation #qsmp discourse

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zvdvdlvr · 2 years

Text

fluff alphabet ( sodapop curtis )

-> navi. | -> outsiders masterlist

A = Admiration (what do they absolutely adore about you?)

Your attention to detail. you know when somethings wrong, through that carefree façade, and you'll coax an explanation outta him.

B = Body (what is their favorite part of your body?)

Your hands, bruh. He loves watching you light your cigarettes, loves watching you fuck up the Socs that talk shit about pony and other people close to you, loves watching you lace your fingers with his, loves watching you.

C = Cuddling (how do they like to cuddle?)

Sodapop Curtis likes to smother or be smothered. Will 100% lay on tip of you if you let him, and is 999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999% willing to have you lay on top of him. In all seriousness, Soda really don't give a fuck whatever y'all are doin as long as ur both together

D = Dates (what does their ideal date with you look like?)

Soda will do just about anything with you, so you've got a variety of things you could both do. Personally, Soda really likes when you find some nice grassy field and you're all wrapped up in his jacket or whatever, and you're talking about whatever-the-fuck comes to mind

E = Emotions (how do they express emotion around you?)

Soda is one to wallow in their feelings before doing something impulsive, so you'd be given little to no warning whatever he's doing if he's upset (angry/sad)

Soda feeling cuddly and lovey is a different situation entirely. This guy is clingy and simping and jesus im overwhelmed thinking about the love he smothers you in 😣💞

F = Family (do they want one? If they do, when?)

Personally, Soda wouldn't be too opposed to having kids, biological or not. He will definitely bust his ass to give his kid the opportunities he didn't/couldn't have, and would the kind of father a lot of people would want

G = Gifts (how do they feel about gift giving? What are their habits when it comes to this?)

With the minimal amount of money this man gets, there is no doubt in my mind he would try his very best to get you a CD or book you've been eyeing

H = Holding Hands (when/how do they like to hold hands?)

ALWAYS, MEIN GOTT. Just hold his hand. He likes it and dgaf if someone says smth to him about it. Soda believes if you truly love someone than you wont be afraid to show that love (and Soda's love language is touch idgaf)

I = Injury (how would they act if you got hurt?)

Angry. Angry at whoever decided to fuck with the gang (everyone loves you, especially bc you're Johnny's second fave person ever)

J = Jokes (do they like to joke around with or prank you? how?)

Like a lot of members in the gang, Soda leans to joking rather than pranking. You both have a lot of inside jokes, and he loves just randomly bringing up said inside joke to see your smile.

K = Kisses (how do they like to kiss you?)

Mans puts effort into kissing you its pretty endearing. The way he pants into your mouth suring a makeout sesh is 😏😏😩😩😩😍😍😍😍🤭🤭🤭❤❤❤ and then he whines and pulls you closer than humanly possible with his hands on the back of your neck. i- 🥵🥵🥵❤❤🤭😍😏😍😍🤭😩🤭😩🤭😍💍💍😇😇😇💒💒💒🧎‍♀️🧎‍♂️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♂️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♂️🛐🛐🛐🛐

L = Love (how do they show you they love you?)

By affirmation and physical touch

M = Memory (favorite memory together?)

First kiss together. No details.

N = Nightmare (what is their worst fear?)

Soda's worst fears: you/Darry/Pony walking out of his life with no warning and school

O = Oddity (what is one quirk they have?)

bros kinda a worrywort

P = Pet Names (what do they like to call you?)

he calls you: babe, baby, doll, pretty girl/boy, angel

you call him: pepsi cola, babe, Coca-Cola, baby, sweetheart,

Q = Quality Time (how do they like to spend time with you?)

Smoking

R = Rhythm (what song reminds you of them?)

-You Found Me by The Fray

-Freaks by Surf Cruise

-Iris by Goo Goo Dolls

S = Secrets (how open are they with you?)

Will answer almost any question you ask him

T = Time (how long did it take you to get together?)

A year maybe? All depends on your resolve

U = Upset (how do they act when you’re upset?)

Well absolutely bust ass to help him, and will absolutely annihilate anyone that says jack shit about him. He'll get real quiet and only ease up if you or his brothers are there to comfort him.

V = Vaunt (what are they proud of? Do they like to show you off?)

He's proud that he can call you his. He loves showing you off, even if you insist theres nothing to show off.

W = Warrior (how do they feel about you fighting? Would they fight for you, beside you, etc?)

Is confident in your ability to fight if you are, but will always look out for you. Soda will definitely fight for you. no comment

X = X-Ray (how well are they able to read you?)

Pretty well, actually. He would observe you for a while before you started dating, and would definitely pick up subtle hints from your body language

Y = Yes (how would they propose to you?)

By proposing to you with a ring pop and then if you said yes you would both go buy a ring

Z = Zen (what makes them feel calm?)

you, smoking, sleeping.

xXx

sodapop curtis taglist:

@orphan--obliterator

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