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rearranging-deck-chairs · 1 year

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it's been 84 years but ive finished my thasmissy fic

heres the link:

and heres the video i made for it a year ago:

youtube

#aaaaaaaa it's done #it's my first story of this length it's like three times as long as my longest story so far i think #so naturally i have a lot to pick on. 'didnt do this well enough. theres an issue here i dont know how to fix' etc #but im still proud that i made it. even if it's very juvenile #in subject and perspective and form and execution #thats alright bc like. IM juvenile #im young and my art is very young #thats alright im allowed to be young and not yet very good at things #there was still value in making this. for me #you have to make bad art #ive internalised what that means now i think #and if nothing else ive almost tripled the total thasmissy word count on ao3 i believe gkhjhgj #that must count for something right

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possiblytracker · 1 year

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valentines day became a lot more fun and less agonising to me as an ace-aro person after it finally clicked over the past few years that whatever the fuck happens today is what i make of it, and that can and does include loving and appreciating the shit out of the friends ive decided i'd like to spend my life with in a way that i can define on my own terms not limited to the generic concept of romance. which i absolutely revel in doing, personally

#first and last post im gonna make about it BUT #kinda wild as a kid who got picked on on vday and got Insanely bitter abt the whole holiday for most of my teenage years #and coped by being 'totally fine with' the idea of living and dying alone bc who could Possibly want to get that close on my terms #that im here now and actually vibing with it #and like. if you hate vday personally i am giving you a pat on the back in solidarity. me too still for the most part #i am not going to be annoying about it for your sakes i respect you so much. best of luck avoiding Designated Love Day #but i am personally reclaiming this shit as a semi-recently discovered Bitch Who Yearns.#what a nice day to consider love in all its incredible forms! how great to remember i love and am loved in return #despite the years and years of thinking it just wasnt something that even loosely applied to me #funny how that works out sometimes. that im still learning things about myself #(some of this is slightly exaggerated ofc i have and have had friends who mean a Lot to me throughout! when i say 'alone' i dont mean Alone #(but it is still only recently ive started to unpack the 'i dont Need to bond that closely with people im Fine to live on my own' kinda #shit that i internalised for a stupid long time as a teenager #maybe i Do want to spend my life with other people in my own queerplatonic way and not only are there people who want that with me #but also make me want it with Them. and thats more than i could ever have imagined as a teenager)#ok tags ramble over im done getting sentimental khgCSDJ

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lovphobic · 3 months

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oh so its just radioactive waves from a worse time in my life

#literally i cannot even begin to comprehend showing anyone even the friends i trust most the small thing i drew #bc theres just such a thorny.. Shame #over nothing! literslly over fucking nothing. nobody was mean to me ab my art in the past so its not that!#but somewhere between then and now i internalised the fact that there is shame in what i do with regards to art+favorite characters #and even outside of that its like. i think the little thing is kinda okay rn. and i feel like if i show anyone ill instantly view it as bad #which i dont want to do! i think the first thing ive drawn in THREE YEARS is good. i think the first thing ive drawn in three years that #happens to be my first time drawing a character is good. why would i wsnt to shatter my own illusion #and like i Do :( want to show my friends... but. last 2 tags.#idk its just very weird to have lamented ab this last night and then see someone ive never met mirroring my Exact Situation #maybe voltron is the problem..

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basicallymikewheeler · 1 month

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sometimes i think about the cast and general production team of st constantly saying “mikes just trying to be normal” cus like…….hes reallly not? and hes never really tried?? like this fits lucas or el more cus both of them try to live a normal life but when lucas brought up to idea of being popular and normal mike was just like “uhhhhhhh no thanks ew” in s4 so like??

season 1-2 his whole gimmick is that him and the party are nerdy and geeky and thats what makes them so cool. hes obviously bothered by the bullying, but he just doesnt make any effort to be normal

in season 3 is probably where this applies the most, because of him wanting to act more mature and do grown up things because he had spent the last 1/2 years fighting upside down monsters and would just like to experience having a normal teenage-hood… but even then HES not trying to be normal if you know what i mean? he still loves nerdy things and the only thing thats really changed is his constant revolvement around his girlfriend???

but even then his obession is kind of justfied because:

after they got will back from dissapearing, mike revolved around him for ages too. going to his appointments, waiting for hours next to him/with the party in the hostipal.

and then eleven “disappears” for like a year, and he does the same exact thing so in my head he’s not trying to be “normal” hes just relieved to have her back yknow? just like he did with will when he came back.

in s4 interviews specifically this narrative of mike trying to be normal is mentioned and im so confused cus like thats the season when hes literally trying NOT to be normal. its literally made a point by eddie that he was embarrassing when he was basic, and that hes cooler now (when he was talking about how first day of freshman year they were wearing clothes their mums picked out). they custom made clothes for him to be edgy and made him grow out his hair.

the best explanation ive seen is that they are hinting to his internalised homophobia. the reason the only thing that hes tried being “normal” at is having a girlfriend. trying to hide suppressed queer feelings by trying to do the most textbook straigh thing, make out with your girlfriend constantly. but even then i dont 100% believe that this is the reason?? because thats the same season dustin was obessed with his girlfriend and he was still one of the not normal ones… (also bc of the point i made in the s3 paragraph)

mike has never really tried to be normal. he literally becomes emo in season 4, the season where they stress this narrative SPECIFICALLY. just rlly confused me

#mike wheeler #stranger things #like wtf #dustin henderson #lucas sinclair #byler? idk #eleven hopper #the party #micheal -NOTNORMAL- wheeler

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irregularcollapse · 6 months

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A Storm That Took Everything

Part IV of a fic preview to celebrate Damen Love Fest 2023

Day 4, and the theme is centred around Damen's personality—which, while I think is definitely showcased across the whole chapter, comes through really strongly here through his interactions with Erasmus and Kastor. This part also continues to cement one of the central conflicts in this fic: Damen's internalised guilt, and his feelings that he is not enough. General reminder that this is a draft, and so I may still be making changes leading up to putting it on AO3. Thanks a whole bunch to everyone who has reblogged and replied so far! It's honestly so great to have reader interest while I'm still in the writing stage—so motivating!

Part I ⚜ Part II ⚜ Part III

Damen’s mother, when driven to use of an umbrella, would always spit three times before opening it against a downpour, no matter the heaviness of the rain. The rain, she would say to him, could break a drought or bring a flood: three spits for luck, and the opening of the Heavens would not lead to drowning.

Under the awning over the doorway, Damen looks out at the rain-soaked night, and spits three times without thinking. A distinct scoff, from his side.

“Anyone would think you were raised a village bumpkin, for all your juvenile superstitions.” Kastor’s voice bears his distinct derision, a clear disappointment in what he sees as Damen’s lack of practicality. Damen can’t help the frown, but manages to bite back on the thought that rises uncharitable and mean: it was Kastor’s mother, not his own, who came from a village.

“You may think it a blessing later, when a disaster is narrowly avoided. We may hit a pothole on our journey, but our wheels will remain secure. Or, you may be narrowly missed by a knocked glass of wine, and so your pristine waistcoat will remain stain-free. Or even better,” Damen continues, forcedly genial even in the face of his brother’s persistently sour mood, “you may find circumstances aligning to catch the eye of a pretty young thing across the dance floor. You may walk out of this reception with a wife, dear brother, and you will have me to thank for it.” Kastor meets him with a glower, but nothing said. He cannot even walk away; the rain is torrential, and the carriage cannot pull closer than it already is. Their tuxedos, perfectly-pressed. Their hair, carefully controlled. Erasmus had proven himself to be deft with a comb, coaxing a neatness and wave to Damen’s curls that he is ever unable to achieve on his own. A worthy hire, it seems. It would be rude to the servant’s efforts to step out into the rain now.

For all Damen’s intentionally-constructed optimism, the rain is a loud and unavoidable message, to be certain. The goat by itself, possible to dismiss. But on a second day, a second sign. The sharp thrill is back in his throat: what could be in store for tomorrow? And what will grow from the three seeds so planted?

“Captain.” A soft voice, still hesitant despite Damen’s every effort to bring the young man confidence and comfort. Damen turns to Erasmus with a deliberately warm smile, and accepts the offered umbrella.

“Our saviour,” he intones with teasing seriousness, and as intended, Erasmus flushes prettily. Admittedly, the young man is proving to be not only an attentive servant, but a pleasing ornament for Damen to look upon. They both recognise, Damen thinks, that he has no intention beyond looking. That is no reason not to indulge, though. “I would be grateful if you ensured the gas lamps are extinguished in my father’s room, once the nurse has made him comfortable for the night. She has said that she is uncertain of their operation.” The servant blanches, almost as rapidly as he had coloured.

“I—Sir. I mean, Captain. I cannot—I am unsure…” The stuttering trails off, and Kastor makes an impatient noise. Damen spares a quelling look to his brother, before turning fully toward Erasmus to erect some wall of perceived privacy.

“I know that my father may seem intimidating, but he is merely an old man. He will likely already be asleep; all you will need to do is enter, darken the room, and leave again.” Erasmus’ gaze drops; when he speaks once more, it is at a whisper.

“Captain, I have no fear of your father. It is—They are not natural. My priest says that the gas lamps are a conduit for Hell. They are a way for the Devil to send Demons into our homes.” It is a bare thing, that Damen does not laugh. He fights back a smile, needing to bite at his lip for a moment to do so.

“I see,” he says, with all the deliberation and gravity that he can muster. “You have no need for fear, Erasmus. You see, my father keeps a crucifix above his bed and an amulet at his bedside, and prays with the nurse each night before sleep. His room, I would be certain in stating, is the most Devil-free in the house.”

“What is the amulet?” Erasmus whispers, still shaky, but with a renewed fortitude.

“A máti, given to him by my late mother for his protection. She watches over him through it, and I am sure she will watch over you as well while you are serving him.” When Erasmus raises his eyes and nods, it is with a decisive bravery that gives Damen the urge to cup the servant’s cheek in his palm. He only gives one more smile though, before saying, “After that, you may retire for the night. You will be able to collect my things for laundering in the morning.” There is a new brightness in the hazel eyes as Erasmus murmurs his understanding, before re-entering the house and shutting the door with characteristic quietness.

With him departed, Kastor makes the fullness of his derision known.

“You are soft with the servants. They do not need your coddling, especially one so useless. If he cannot even turn down a lamp, why should you continue to pay him?”

“He is not useless,” Damen hedges, hoisting the umbrella and holding it high over both their heads, “he is simply unpractised. If I am not kind to him, he will not learn.”

“If you are not firm with him, he will not learn.” Damen hums, not wanting to engage in this argument. He knows how they differ on this: Kastor sees the servants as his right; Damen sees them as his privilege. To the footman who holds the carriage door for them, Damen gives a measured thanks and smile, while Kastor slides into the compartment without acknowledgement. They have both managed to avoid the rain, at least, excepting the unavoidable splash onto their shoes and trouser cuffs. Easier to dry than a silk-lapelled tailcoat, though.

It is only when the coach has pulled from their yard and is trundling down the rain-soaked street that Kastor chooses to speak again.

“I would prefer if you went ahead and fucked him without all the preamble. It will be less arduous for everyone that way, involved or subjected.” Damen balks, jerking raised eyebrows and wide eyes from his contemplation of the dampness outside the carriage window to stare at his brother.

“Excuse me? Who?”

“The servant boy. He certainly has… attributes which you seem to find favourable.”

“Erasmus? He is not a boy; he is twenty, I believe. And besides, I have no intention of—He is my servant.”

“We both know that has not stopped you before.” If Damen were prone to flushing with embarrassment, he would probably do so now. As it is, he simply looks back out the window, glaring at the rain to spare his brother the frown.

“I was a boy myself at the time, as you are aware. I have not done so since returning from Marlas. And there is the small matter of my being betrothed.” Kastor scoffs again, a distinct ire in the noise.

“You are not married yet. And such a thing never stopped Father.” Damen feels his spine lock. He cannot look away from the window, could not move even if he wanted to. A mercy; if he were to turn the expression he is currently wearing upon his brother, Kastor may be liable to meet Death in this carriage.

“I am not Father,” Damen grits out, as flat as he can make it.

“You and I are in agreement about that, at least.”

After a renewed stretch of absolute and grating silence, the next mercy is the servants waiting with additional umbrellas at the top of the turning circle outside the unknown Veretian’s manor house; this way, Damen does not need to ferry his brother to the door, and can stride off to leave Kastor to the charitable cover of a borrowed umbrella without added guilt. They will have to be announced separately as a result, but no one should find it curious: Damen is the only one with rank and title, and although Kastor may be allowed to use their father’s name in some circles, the reality is that he bears his mother’s. There may as well be no connection between them, in this stranger’s house.

Part V of Chapter I of A Storm That Took Everything will be posted on day 5 of the Damen Love Fest 🖤🖤🖤

#damenlovefest2023 #captive prince #captive prince fic #damianos of akielos #lamen fic #my writing #a storm that took everything fic

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melloneah · 5 months

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How would a female near, mello, and Matt be in your opinion? Would it affect the story?

oh. my. GOD. you have opened the pandoras box rn.

so tbh ive never thought about this before u sent me this ask but god do I have some stuff to say now that I’ve given it a little tinker

obviously this will be deeply rooted in my own belief system and personal experiences bc it’s undeniably connected to gender stereotypes and nature vs nurture

Prepare for a literal essay rn. Proper punctuation and capitalisation n shit.

To start, I wanna mention that my belief is that men and women don’t differ that much in behaviours and personalities inherently or biologically, but they’re raised based on stereotypes and assumptions which forms them into individuals that are either more masculine or feminine (behaviourally, so stereotypically). This is not including the slight biological differences that testosterone vs estrogen might cause, as i do not have much knowledge on the specifics (sorry I hate biology…) and obviously some people can be born with an innate tendency towards stereotypical masculinity or femininity in their personality.

This will require me to make some assumptions regarding how old Matt, Mello and Near were when they joined Wammy’s house. Also, obviously, this analysis will be based on if they were raised as cisgendered females; this is really important to analyse how their personalities could differ based on their experiences.

So let’s assume: they all joined Wammy’s House at a young enough age to have no real recollection of their biological families. This means that their guardians’ parenting styles had no real effect on their personalities (at least no effect on their typically gendered characteristics). This also makes it easier as we have a little bit of insight into what Wammy’s could be like in the context of parenting, while we have none on the biological families. This will still pretty much be a guessing game, but at least the guesses will be somewhat calculated.

Now we could be optimistic and claim that Wammy’s is “above” gender stereotypes and the (often unconscious) differences in raising girls vs boys. As much as I would love to believe this, I feel like the story being set in the early 2000s already negates it. I am a strong believer of the fact that society and your general environment greatly affect you, no matter how hard you try to break free of the mould. There will always be internalised beliefs and tendencies for certain actions caused by your environment that are just beyond your control, and they are often unconscious. Trying to change ones biases is hard work and a long process demanding self awareness and dedication.

Roger and Wammy are old men; as much as I’d love them to be allies💅 that don’t let gender affect their decisions and behaviour towards people, I do think the bias is inherently there to some extent. They wouldn’t decide against a girl being L’s successor simply because she’s a girl - they’re above that - but I do think as girls, Matt, Mello and Near could have a tougher time at the orphanage.

Ok moving on to specifically how/why it could affect their personalities. (god this is getting so long already I am so sorry)

Mello

We all know Mello has a super fiery personality and is filled with determination, so this one is the most fun to think about for me!!!

Most importantly, her looks would be very feminine. She’d love fashion, love skirts and dresses, and be stereotypical in that context, but would be VERY PROUD OF IT!!! EXCEPT. Her personality is canonically extremely contrasting to her looks/style. She’d get in so much more trouble at Wammy’s for being loud and bullying others, because it would just be more shocking for the teachers to see a girl act that way rather than a boy. There would be no concessions. No getting out of any smallest bit of trouble just because “boys will be boys”. But this wouldn’t make her timid; it was bound to fuel her anger even more.

It was infuriating to her when people saw a "girl in a leather mini skirt", and on account of that she wasn’t taken seriously in the pursuit of her goals. But when she acted up, all eyes were on her, and the punishment was always dire.

This also brings me to the fact that getting into the mafia was NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE. Nobody took this teenaged girl in stilettos seriously, so she had to improvise. Mello as a girl would have had to be far more ruthless in her journey trying to join the mob. Crueler. Angrier. Scare people by drastic means and desperate measures into finally taking her seriously and seeing her as worthy of respect. I think female Mello would have had much more blood on her hands, and would have been really scary...

I also think Mello would be a radical feminist. She would eventually HATE MEN as a whole, as she’d get objectified SO MUCH in the mafia. She’d just be completely done with their shit, so much so, that she would just channel her anger at an entire gender bc she was just fed. up. (and probably a little traumatised)

Her most hated phrase is “that’s not ladylike”. She values her femininity very much, and hates when people use empty stereotypes to belittle it. She can scream her head off at Near and still be a Lady!

Near

Studies show that autism is only diagnosed at a 4:1 boys to girls ratio, which means that if Near were a girl, she may not have had the access to as many accomodations. She’d still be supported in many ways, but it could be done hesitantly. Her timid behaviour and hobbies could be seen as “feminine”, meaning that if she’d ask for accomodations, the necessity for them could be doubted. (I know Wammy’s probably doesn’t officially diagnose, but Near imo desperately needs accomodations to simply function) (also, this section is very much so an “if” in my mind; it could happen depending on the level of unconscious prejudice in the orphanage, but it’s extremely dependent on the staff).

I don’t think Near being a cis girl would really affect the plot, though. I genuinely believe Near’s character transcends gender a bit, maybe he’s immune to the influence of different methods of parenting? He’s just himself and doesn’t care if people tell him he should “go out and play” or “just be a boy”.

Matt

We know the least about Matt’s canon personality, so this will mostly be based on what I believe him to be like. We know that he doesn’t care about much, and he likes games.

I think Matt is the most “boyish” of our Wammy boys, so in my mind, as a girl, she’d be quite the tomboy. Her personality wouldn’t be that much different. She could have been force fed more “girly hobbies” rather than gaming (not sure if he picked up gaming himself, or if someone introduced him to it). If he was in fact introduced by someone to video games, I believe that as a girl, she could have been shown different hobbies that are more traditionally feminine instead. Or maybe just a different game, like the sims? (the sims 1 came out in 2000 so could happen) then she could branch out into different games herself.

IT is also a very masculine interest in people’s eyes, so when she found an interest for it, she may have been slightly discouraged by teachers, but that didn't stop her, and as soon as she started being decent at it, the teachers respected it.

I do feel like as a girl, the one thing that would definitely change in Matt is his attitude. She would simply care more, as she’d spent her childhood fighting wearing skirts, fighting for her hobbies and trying to run from stereotypical femininity.

She wouldn't be particularly furious at the world, more irritated, so she wouldn't chew someone out for telling her to wear a dress for an assembly - she'd just flat out refuse wearing it and ignore anyone who'd try to persuade her.

She didn't understand why everyone is so insistent on a girl having long hair or wearing make up, and it made her feel like she couldn't be herself. She always wanted to feel like a girl, but kept feeling like it was against the rules without looking feminine. She spent a long time feeling out of place, alienated and desperately wanting to be part of a community.

Once she got comfortable with herself, I feel like she'd constantly pick up typically boyish hobbies to piss people off. (But she would genuinely enjoy them too of course!!) (and be entertained by people getting mad at stupid and pointless shit like a girl being into cars)

ok jesus i spent hours on this. it’s 1400 words. i dont know how i managed this. i struggle to write 500 word essays for uni……i am normal about death note i am normal about death note i am normal about death note 🙏 ummmm enjoy? and please let me know what you guys think!!!

#asks #mello #near #matt death note #death note #mihael keehl #nate river #matt #mail jeevas #wammy boys #wammy’s house

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yuri-for-businesswomen · 4 months

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I'm a lesbian and masochistic. I know from a feminist standpoint what bdsm is but how much do the dynamics change when it's two women? I don't know if this is due to some mental issue that can get resolved with say years of therapy but I've been this way as long as I can remember (before puberty it was minus the sex obv). I'm not asking for a moral judgement I've just never told anyone this outside of a few girlfriends and I want an outside and feminist point of view

hey! i have answered a similar question recently which you can read here. to make it short: i think its important to get in touch with your own sexuality and body in a sensual way. a lot of this is about self love, in the literal sense too. engage through masturbation or with a partner you really trust and who really turns you on! forget the script in your head and return to essentials: touching, caressing, long intense foreplay. im not a therapist by any means so this is really just my personal advice.

from a feminist point of view, homosexual relationships are inherently more equal because there is no power imbalance between the sexes, which in a patriarchal society reflects in het couplings. obviously there can be other power imbalances: one being mentally ill, for example, more commonly age or race. and lesbians are women at the end of the day, they have a better predisposition to be less affected by misogyny because they dont have sex with men, but they are still socialised as women and not immune to the internalisation of misogynistic ideals…

ive said it before, this one reason why lesbian and gay experiences are so essential for feminism, to see what traces are left from the patriarchy even if the sexual and domestic subjugation of women - which is a main pillar of the patriarchy - is abandoned, and homosexuality is inherently not patriarchal. like, for example, a lesbian woman being masochistic. this proves that there are other factors at play in developing masochistic/sadistic kinks than just het power relations. bdsm is actually quite big in some parts of the gay scene too. my personal opinion is that power is just something that can always play a role in sex, often as a proxy for other things. now who develops masochistic and who develops sadistic is often influenced by sex (women either taking on the submissive role/men the dominant one or more rarely reversing the societal power imbalance in the bedroom) and that’s why its a feminist issue, but it can also be influenced by personal experiences/trauma or other inequalities…

#am i making sense? i cant tell #sorry if this didnt help you at all #i was not sure what your ask is aimed at exactly so im just babbling #ask

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violottie · 2 months

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I cant stress enough how much bi lesbians and bi lesbian discourse flared up my SO-ocd, I was fine for a few months and then I returned to this side of tumblr and I get reminded of them. One of my worst fears is that I am somehow a “bi lesbian” or if after all these years of questioning and finally coming to the conclusion that I’m a lesbian I’ll turn out to be straight in the end. Idk if I should have stayed on the art side of tumblr but where else do I find other lesbians??? I wish I could go back to when I didn’t know “bi lesbians” existed it was easier back then. Apparently the only thing to make intrusive thoughts subside is to be like “so what if I’m not a lesbian, who cares” but I cant do that. I wanna go back to when I didn’t know there were people who deliberately fake being gay because that’s also one of my fears,, even though when I realized I was a lesbian it felt like I REALIZED it rather than chose it

(this is gonna be long but it's very important to talk about so just a heads up on that)

i am so so sorry to hear this, and im infuriated that these fucking creeps in the "community" have caused not only so much blatant lesbophobia to spread but also have caused so much harm to lesbians.

i am right with you because ive been through, and still go through sometimes, what you're experiencing. its terrifying that all this bullshit can snowball and make any doubts we lesbians already have from living in this heterosexual patriarchal society double and multiply even more viciously.

my internalised lesbophobia has worsened also. i doubt myself alot and more often thanks to all this bs. its... i dont even have words to express how damaging lesbophobia, especially from within the "community", is.

it causes harm and trauma and pain and suffering for lesbians, but all these stupid juvenile shits just think it doesnt matter because "uwu theyre so kweer and cool now"

it sucks... but i need you to know it is not your fault that you feel this way.

no matter what anyone inside or outside the community says, and no matter what your spiralling thoughts might make you believe as a result of lesbophobia inside and outside the community, you are not straight, you are not a "bi lesbian", you are not bisexual. you are a lesbian.

i know it is so so hard to just say but i promise you, nothing they say will ever ever change the reality of your lesbianism. i promise you.

it hurts, and its beyond infuriating to have to share space with these disrespectful bastards who coopt our lived experience for a moment of attempted self-actualisation, and that pain deserves to be acknowledged and soothed, not pushed away.

i wish i could give you a hug rn honestly because this shit just fucking sucks. i too wish i could go back to the time when these idiots werent even a concept in my mind or memory, but if there is any advice i can give you to help ease the torment of this constant barrage, it is this:

❤️🧡🤍🩷💖

1) know, for a fact, that nothing anyone, and i mean ANYONE says and no matter how loud they say it, will ever change the lived and exact reality of your innate sexuality.

nothing will ever magic away your lesbianism. it is wired into you, it IS you, a very central part of your personhood. that is not something that any words, especially words shat out of the asshole of a dickhead child on the internet, can ever change.

im not disregarding the hurt, im just reminding you that who you are, who you truly are, cannot change because of the words that hurt. especially because you know deep down that those words are not true.

because being a lesbian is who you are. it is not a quota to reach, or what you do, it is who we are. innately. you know where your natural attactions lie, what genders draw your attraction exclusively and without effort. you know that deep down. we are literally born this way. words cannot change that.

❤️🧡🤍🩷💖

2) the best thing to do whenever you accidentally glimpse said bullshit is to block them and focus on uplifting the actual lesbian community.

lesbians community is such an integral lifeline, i cannot emphasise the sheer importance of enough.

these idiots are, after all, idiots and do not deserve your energy, your time or your pain. they will never matter, and the truth is, they only exist on the internet among weirdos who have no sense of self so seek it by stealing bits and pieces from other peoples personal experience and identity.

they are and always will be inauthentic, unlike you.

❤️🧡🤍🩷💖

3) find and focus on the joy of your lesbianism individually and in lesbian community with other lesbians.

We lesbians are blessed to experience the best kind of human life possible: lesbianism.

our sexuality is bold and strong and proud and beautiful and brilliant and effervescent. it is perfect and brave and worthy of honor and praise and celebration and respect.

our community of lesbians is just as exquisite as we are individually. we are diverse and divine. every butch, femme, stud, stone, masc and feminine lesbian; every trans woman, transmasc, transfem and nonbinary lesbian; every black and brown and lesbian of color; every aromantic, asexual, aroace, non-partnering and polyamourous lesbian; every lesbian of every age and race is so overflown with wisdom and joy and love and brilliance. there is nothing more empowering as a lesbian and nothing that strengthens lesbian pride more than being in a community of lesbians and finding joy in ourselves through each other.

and im not just saying this to be mushy. i mean it. lesbians are divine, and thus, you are also divine.

you are perfect as a lesbian because you ARE a lesbian. you are incredible and intelligent and brilliant and brave.

nothing will change the brilliance of who you are, and in everything you are as a lesbian, you have a universe of lesbians who have been, who are and who will be, all of whom have not only been through the same and similar demeaning bs from the same kind of lesbophobic idiots, but they fought it back and survived and lived and thrived as lesbians.

you are just as strong as every lesbian who has been and is. and you are not alone. i promise you.

i am slowly rebuilding the community of lesbians on this blog that i had on my old one, but i promise you, on my blog you are safe. i swear, i will always always put lesbians first here, and that includes you. i will always defend and support and celebrate lesbians first here, and here you will find many other lesbians who will do the same.

❤️🧡🤍🩷💖

i know this was long, im sorry about that but i just need you to know that i see and feel your pain with you, and i need you to know that you arent going through it alone, and you are not alone.

we lesbians have always stuck together to defend and fight for one another, we have always survived, we have always been here, and we always will be.

i hope this reassures you in some way, and know you're always welcome and safe here ❤️🧡🤍🩷💖

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gerrymike · 10 months

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Writing pointers Ive internalised up to now more or less for my own reference no one asked but i needed the refresher

- classic show not tell kinda subscribed to the Palahniuk school i dont have the article on hand but it’s good even though i forget to do it sometimes. My philosophy is show for the 80% of time where showing lets you puppet around sexier pictures, tell for maybe 20% of the time when you have a specific voice to the telling and if the pictures the showing makes are pointless/redundant/slow-downs. okay hey wait I found the article it’s called “Nuts and bolts”

- Ocean Vuong on metaphors where the metaphor HAS to serve a purpose or connect to something, or at least have an “underneath” underside to it that can’t be accessed through any other means, note: sometimes the metaphor comes to you but usually if you feel real strong about it and can’t seem to replace it with anything else then it’s probably got a hidden layer already that will show itself to you with time even if it doesn’t really make sense in the moment. This pointer is the main source of my anguish when i read my old stuff because Im always like fucccckkkkk this metaphor is so gauche, what are you doing

- again i dont fkin remember where this is from but the thing about external/internal prose - God i swear this is from someone’s medium account but i don’t know. Basically interior novels where page space is mainly your character’s thoughts VS physical space novels, with your characters moving around, acting out and interacting with an environment with their thoughts maybe veiled from reader. Kind of ties into Nuts and Bolts with the showing, but on a diff level I like to stay in the external realm in a way where you could block the whole novel as a play with clearer, charming actions that can translate to visually compelling stage directions. Of course it depends on how interior/exterior your narrator/character is but in principle i find it easy to dislike overly interior narrators (why should your reader care what your narrator thinks??)

- secondary to prev point, if the movement/interactions you block aren’t inherently stylish then they should serve a purpose, moving your characters from point A to point B necessitates a relevant activity at point B, a push factor away from point A, or valuable information communicated from what happens in the journey…wait i say stylish a lot i dunno if ykwim best example i can think of is from Miss Julie where (even though it’s secondary to the dialogue at hand) while Julie tries to bargain with Christine you have Jean VISIBLE TO THE AUDIENCE in the wings of the stage sharpening his razor two hands nodding to himself as she repeats exactly the words he used to bargain with her <- THAT is style

- kinda boils down to the common thing about ensuring motivations for all of your characters, like all of them should have wants that drive them to be in places (if you flesh your guys out wholly enough this should come naturally)

- on character voices best if you can reach a point where you can basically hear them chatting at you in your head: best examples I think are like, Mercymorn from the locked tomb (crazy brilliant and bonkers voicing from muir imo), Tennessee williams plays (but they’re plays so obviously the voices are meant to be heard - i just personally haven’t seen any of them performed so i hear them 100% based on williams’ skill in writing dialogue)… no real tips on getting to this point but if you’re going for a specific brogue obviously listening to it helps. Though the point of writing fiction is ofc that it’s fiction and you can make your characters talk funnier and smarter than anyone in real life might so like: liberties, my philosophy is style over realism in the tradition of stage monologues and the like, where your characters chat in the manner you wish people around you talked all the time (STRIKE THROUGH THE MASK!!!!!)

- word count for sake of word count is your enemy if you ever catch yourself writing a scene that bores you, if it bores your reader then no ones gonna be happy. Cut it and frame it in a way that you like enough to keep in at all costs

- lowkey been trying to cut down my semicolon usage because I grudgingly see the value of Cormac Mccarthy stylistic choices but laaaaiiiikeee its hard and sometimes you need it to install a kind of half-breath in your prose - i think the middle ground I want to reach is the use of it as a luxury and not like pepper (literally searched the last chapter for my semicolon usage and its 28 like 3 per thousand words :( help)

- literally never make me read the word cishet in a serious work of writing ever. “Dysphoria” no “trans” its 50/50 “genderfuck” get out of town no “intersectional feminist” no. Okay lol this point is just me being not liking any explicit integration of the present cultural-political terminology into writing and also me being a bit bitchy about this one lgbt cult novel named after a US state if you can guess which. My view is it will always be gauche and i dont like it and it tends to prompt me to say out loud to myself My God I hate gay people

More later if i think of it but i swear ive yet to meet the writing pointer from a true sage that is gonna transform my thinking and make what im capable of transcendental

#Abt the listening to accents point i did like #specifically watching chicken shop date interviews .. that algerian fella who does jokes on tiktok … split decision EP #Legit they were right I dont listen to UK rap if it aint dave or cench #anyway MLE is literally hypnotising #last point #I promise its not like dont write trans narratives its more like if your trans narrative is didactic then just pull a long chu and write #INSUFFERABLE THEORY #Obviously i dont follow all of these all the time esp when im writing for practice and cant be bothered #subscribe at your discretion

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normanbased · 9 months

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Now that I’m thinking about it, I really want to assess how Norman responds to instances of abuse.

We really have to think about the intricacies of Norman’s upbringing and his time at the Motel. Obviously we know he was horrifically abused by his mother both physically, mentally, and sexually. He clearly resented this, and internalised his hatred of her through his delusions. ‘Mother’ is horrible to Norman, which we can assume is a pretty clear reflection of what she was like in life, especially in combination with Psycho IV.

Norma is the only family Norman consistently had before he ended up living alone for a considerable amount of time. His life after the initial murders is extremely hazy and unclear, but we can assume he remained at the motel with help from the county sheriff and his wife (they speak to and of him in a very affectionate way, which I like to believe suggests they supported him in his final teenage years — though his formative years have been spent in incredible trauma).

We know he has an awareness of the type of people who should not be at the motel in Psycho II. For the most part, gangbangers and drug addicts. But what type of people did he meet over the years visiting the motel? He rarely left home, so we have to imagine that his perception of a normal relationship is based upon the many guests who arrived there. Against his own wishes, and whether he liked to admit it or not, the Bates Motel WAS a seedy, run down motel hidden away on a dark, quiet, old highway. What type of people frequent those places? How many abusive relationships did he encounter and internalise as normal? What sort of scenes did he have to deal with when cleaning rooms and decide that this was normal?

If we think about the scene in Psycho II where he defends Mary in the diner, we know that Norman recognises abuse in the most blatant examples — a young woman being harassed and bullied by an older man. But would he have understood the dynamic of a young woman coming into the diner with an older man — who grips her arm tightly, who whispers to her, and who intimidates her? Would he have recognised her nervous laughter and closed body language to be fear? How many times did he see that exact kind of relationship in the motel front lobby? Is it normal to him?

When his mother was in an abusive relationship, he recognised it, he says it out loud that he understood that what was occurring was wrong — so perhaps it’s something he would only recognise if it occurred to someone else? That outsider perspective often leaves room for more critical thinking. Does that mean while Norman can recognise abuse and stand up for those experiencing it, he doesn’t see or refuses to push back against his own abusers?

It’s difficult to say really, because at the end of the day, he did kill his mother, but he didn’t kill Mary or Lila. All I can really conclude is that he has a lot of contradictory reactions to different kinds of abuse, and I really want to understand why.

#ramble #psycho #Norman bates

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postgameroutesix · 6 months

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3 for the book asks : )

“3: what were your top 5 books of the year?”

THE HAUNTING OF HILL HOUSE BY SHIRLEY JACKSON. rewired my entire brain made me scream and throw up!!! it is THE haunted house story with how the horror relies on the psychological state of our unreliable protagonist and narrator eleanor (who is for sure a gothic heroine of all time). it’s so indicative of ms jackson’s talent that she doesnt need to SHOW us the horror of hill house, only imply it, to frighten us and the characters. it’s all up to both our and eleanor’s imagination. maybe the real horror was familial trauma all along. the ending too …. no notes … mwah mwah book of all time

BELOVED BY TONI MORRISON. another absolutely fundamental brain rewiring haunted house… ive been talking a lot with my friend zaina about her work and one thing we talked about was how much of her work centres around the intergenerational trauma of racism and the theme of love - “what does it mean to love?” and beloved is of course the epitome of this. sethe is an incredibly written character and even though i read it all the way back in march i still remember the way while you’re reading you’re simultaneously hooked and cannot stop but MUST stop because you have to take breaks to process

THE BLUEST EYE BY TONI MORRISON. i read this only last month and holy shit !! my engagement was definitely boosted by my discussions with my friend zaina as previously mentioned but there is an unending amount of things to talk about with this book - the structure, writing style, characters and their relationships its all so rich with so much depth and im obsessed with all of it. i LOVED the structure how it begins with a repetitive passage that instantly hooks you showing this idyllic life of a middle class white nuclear family that, and how the narrative begins with its ending, the non linearity with how we’re constantly diving into different lives and perspectives. the character parallels between family members, particularly the breedlove family, are so cleverly woven in and do so much to reinforce those themes of generational trauma and cycles of abuse. i will stop now but this book will, much like beloved, seep under my skin and stick there forever

ANNIHILATION BY JEFF VANDAMEER. i inhaled this book earlier this year it was so gripping it really grabs you by the throat and implores u to keep reading to figure everything out. if the haunting of hill house and the bluest eye did not tip u off. i love unreliable narrators who force you to question if you can trust their recounting of events and the biologist is a great one - i love the detail of the characters being known only as their professions, especially by the biologist, it adds to the dark mystery so much…. i havent read the other books in the series yet lol because honestly i love annihilation as a standalone. ill probably get to them at some point

GIOVANNI’S ROOM BY JAMES BALDWIN. the book that got me out of a slump and back into reading lots this year!!! i read it in the school library trying not to react too intensely but i really think this is the perfect book in encapsulating the shame we’re made to feel in being lgbt and how difficult it is to trudge through that and the disastrous impacts that internalised shame has on our relationships with other lgbt people. really revived me thank you mr baldwin i need to read more of your books

#THANK U!#★: notif #lit&lang

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aguineapigcouldntdothis · 2 months

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I was thinking about that spider post you made and just, like… exploring your relationship with spirituality and religion is so cool. I don’t believe in a higher power and I don’t think that’ll ever change (it could, but I really can’t conceptualise that for me), but in the past few months I’ve been exploring what I actually believe and what feel right to me, and it’s been the best thing ever

I’ve come to the sort of vague conclusion that there is something that makes us as existing things special, we’re not just electrical signals operating flesh, and then there’s also something that makes humans special in some way. I both have no idea and exactly know what that something is, but it’s just way too abstract to put into words. I also believe in… I don’t know how to say this, but the universe? Like, I really believe in existence and meaning

For so long, I was struggling so badly because I was sort of forcing myself to be super atheist— nothing wrong with being atheist btw, while I don’t consider myself one I also don’t consider myself religious or believe in the moshiach or a tangible afterlife, so there’s overlap. But just, I remember all of these nights where I would just break down because of this feeling that there wasn’t existential meaning. And I just refused to acknowledge that… maybe there is meaning, outside of just what our brains create for us. And now that I’ve actually explored my beliefs and come to a conclusion I feel is right, I actually feel happy! I feel really happy and really good about this stuff

Antitheism in progressive spaces did so much harm to me, even though I never became one myself, I definitely internalised a lot of that stuff, and it was so shitty. I’m glad I’ve worked through that stuff, because it’s genuinely so toxic and nobody really tries to talk about it, aside from religious minorities. Like, it’s okay to have beliefs. It’s okay to be vaguely spiritual, or to be very staunchly religious, it’s okay. I really think a lot of people need to here that

this ask is truly one of the most beautiful and self reflective things ive heard someone say regarding their own spirituality. your explanation of your struggles with spirituality and atheism is something that so many people struggle with, especially in a world where so many are placed into the box of "devoutly religious" or "atheist with a strong disdain for any form of spirituality" with no form of nuance. i wish more people talked about being in that in-between area.

religion provides meaning to people, but unfortunately, faith is assumed to be solely for religious people. when in reality it is crucial that all people believe in something. if not G-d then at the very least a belief in nature, or science, or the stars, whatever. im sure you understand how important that is given the pain you felt when you were grappling with a lack of meaning present in atheist spaces.

there is nothing wrong with atheism, yet there is a lot wrong with the belief that humans should not find meaning in our lives. it is harmful to ourselves and others if we assume that we live just to breathe for a few decades and then our bodies give out and we die. i am 100% not saying people need to believe in G-d. they do not, plus fuck proselytizing with a spiky stick. however, everyone should strive to care about life and to find purpose in it in whatever ways that means to them

your story shows how important this is. you struggled with that lack of meaning, and when you found it it helped you because life felt purposeful once again. living is a beautiful thing and it carries the meaning that we give to it. if we refuse to give discussions about humanity and life the time they deserve, then we too will fall into the pattern of feeling disdain for the deep meanings they carry.

because maybe it's just a spider. maybe it hid in my shadow because its dark and i just turned a bright light on in the bathroom. spiders have shit eyesight and it went to the closest spot in which it figured it would be safe. spiders also are not capable of complex thought, although they are smarter than we assume (please learn about spider behavior its fascinating).

there are so many questions buried in this event. did the spider know i was alive? could it feel my presence? did it have any way to understand that i was safe? does it even have a concept of pain? was it acting on instinct or was this a decision it made? could a spider ever truly understand what a human is? what a human does? can we truly understand g-d? can we give life a specific meaning? do we even know what to believe? how do we choose our actions? are we the ones making these decisions or is it something deeply instinctual? are we all just like that little spider, running into a shadow for safety for reasons that evade us, and hoping that we made the right decision yet never being able to know until that fateful moment where we're either left alone or smushed under a slipper?

#jewish #jumblr #animal welfare

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taikanyohou · 2 years

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Can I ask you something? If Bls fetishize gay men, is there really anyway to ethically consume any series at all?

hiiii anon!!!!

oh good question.

ok. so. i think recent bl's, i'd say .... from 2020-ish, maybe even 2018/2019 tbh, have taken that step forward where, they're tryna move away from blantant fetishising, and become more progressive, not just towards gay men, but the asian queer community in general, and anyone who identifies themselves within that community.

that being said, of course there will be instances where queer asian people, including queer asian men, will be fetishised.

i think the biggest example in terms of progression has been in the sheer amount different genres of asian queer shows that are produced, and in addition to that, in the increasing number of people who both behind the cameras and in front of them identify as asian and queer too.

also i feel like the way sex is used in asian queer shows has shifted. yes, of course, there are still instances of rape/non-con/dub-con, but there was a time when sex was Literally Only used within asian queer shows For That Only. now? sex is used to explore dynamics, explore feelings, progress a story, progress a relationship. its treated as a character, in a sense, and given some meaning and substance. also, that includes the whole top/bottom discourse too. like. i think there's just more looseness and freedom to it now? like. yeah, some characters LIKE bottoming, some LIKE topping, some ARE versatile! for example, i call pete from kinnporsche a pillow princess ALL the time, and thats bc he IS. thats with no malice or rudeness or any intent to fetishise him as being all weak and delicate, usually the traits that are associated with "being a bottom", bc he isnt weak or delicate! but during sex, he LIKES being the taker, he likes receiving, and that plays a huuuuge part in his character's development later on in the show.

i'd also say "coming out stories" have recently not been .... THAT heavily used, within recent shows that i have watched? and thats not to say that coming out stories arent important! of course they are. or there's a lesser case of characters having internalised homophobia, filled with shame and self-loathing bc they realise they're queer, in recent shows i have watched. thats not to say they dont question who they are, they do, but they dont hate themselves for being queer. its more a case of exploration. and its so nice to see that for a change? asian queer characters being gentle on themselves, learning to treat themselves with patience and time to navigate their identity. and its so nice to also see asian queer characters for a change who are just, queer! loud and queer!

what i'm trying to say is that they are all stories at the end of the day. and all forms of story telling, from healthy to toxic, from stories of kids in school to students in uni to working adults, from coming out stories to stories that talk about sparking a political revolution, stories that are coming of age or a slice of life, stories that span all types of backgrounds and time periods, should be able to be told. and sometimes they'll have characters that are already so comfortably queer in their own skin and some that aren't, and there'll be some stories that are more tame in terms of how physical they are and like to explore the more emotional nuances of the story and some that like to explore sex in a multitude of ways. there's really no right or wrong in terms of wanting to set out a story and choosing which way to tell it. the scope is so huge.

now. like i said. not every asian queer piece of media will be faultless, and there will be instances of fetishisation. but i also want to look at how far we've come! i've been around watching asian queer media since ... god .... i cant even remember how long, its been that long, and ive seen how far we've come. as an asian queer person myself, it gives me so much pride and joy in seeing that!

and i think, the older and more mature i have gotten, my mindset has changed a lot. now, i like to see stories and media as a whole thing. that, yes, there will be faults and its not going to be perfect. but as someone who can compartmentalise, as a consumer, as an audience member, as an asian queer person, as someone who is watching this as a form of escapism, i'll recognise the faults and the things i'm not fond of, or that dont sit right with me, and put them to one side, and still allow myself to enjoy the rest of the story/media. otherwise, i'll never be able to enjoy anything ever again, if i scrutinise every single little thing and every little detail ethically. like i said, not everything will sit right with me, but i can work with that and say "yeah i didnt like that narrative choice" and put it to a side, and move on. and if its reeeeeeally bugging me, i'll just drop the show. now, some people like doing that (scrutinising every little detail through ethical lenses) and thats their choice in how they view media. but ig i'm not like that? and i can let myself enjoy asian queer stories that are trying to say something, to convey something, as a bigger picture.

and yeah, there will be instances where queer characters in asian media will get fetishised, there will be the whole "husband and wife" and "girls on campus stalking a queer couple" etc etc etc. but i can look at all that and say to myself, yeah, work needs to be done here, whilst also enjoying the rest of the show and what its trying to convey or tell.

so yeah, i do think you can, if as a consumer, you can appreciate the bigger picture whilst also understanding that we've still got some room for progress.

#faiza answers

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k-ru-h · 1 year

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ok first of all. i am sius #1 defender and i wouldnt accuse him of shit without proper proof but. i actually think its important to talk abt this. and second of all this is the only time im ever posting fastpass screenshots but just because the appearance of a character is extremely relevant

listen i know we're all very excited at the idea of a canon gay character in tog, but i really dont think this was the best of moves. tog has so far been mostly pretty alright with handling gnc characters (think how well aka was treated by others, khun being very feminine, etc) and i dont think this one fuckup will change that just. siu is a grown ass adult from a very conservative country and his portrayal of intersex characters such as evankhell or aka isnt very, well, "woke" (evankhell being the only lead brown woman while being "half man" plays into a lot of racial stereotypes, as well as treating intersexuality as a literal curse). i kind of wanna like , talk about this new "queer" character kaya (i saw ppl call him that online, idfk) and like. ill just go thru my points in no particular order idfk ive written too many coherent essays for school this week abd it's 3am i think i deserve a fucked up little one

ok first of all. jesus fucking christ what is this character design

so uh. heres our gay male character! with massive fake tits, lipstick and long hair! this wouldn't be a problem in media already filled with other queer characters, but on its own, especially with the character being darker-skinned yet again, it plays into a lot of stereotypes abt trans women, as well as brown women being masculine. and listen, i know tog has a lot of very wacky character designs, but it also has a lot of gorgeous ones, and while i really dont think it was sius intention to make a transphobic, racist caricature (istg you can psychoanalyse this man just off of tog alone), i think it definitely has something to do either with his own internalised racism and transphobia, or with a lack of education to spot a (hopefully) mistake by assistant artists.

here are some random ass caricatures of trans women i found online and by god i am not crediting this shit, but. look at what i mean. the fake tits, the dress/skirt, the long hair and lipstick.... the resemblance is startling.

but okay. lets say this by itself isnt important. siu made an oopsie and we got a canonically queer character that defends his right to like men unapologetically, and bam didnt seem to mind, and was polite abt it! weeeeeellll... the thing is, this whole fucking thing is a ploy. and if it turns out siu negates my previous point by making it turn out that kaya IS just playing a caricature on purpose because he wants the political advantage and isnt actually gay but is, in fact, homophobic, i will eat that shit up. that would actually make a very good point and having a critique of homophobia is better than having a homophobic gay character. but lets say he is gay for now, lets assume. that still leaves a possibility that he is gay AND just using bam, but lets just assume thats not the case either. lets say he's actually gay and actually wants to marry bam, for whatever fucking reason. bam being polite doesnt mean shit!!! people on twitter are unironically saying this means he's okay with being in a romantic &/or sexual relationship with a man when it literally does not. bam isnt okay with any of this. from start to finish, be it a man or a woman, bam is in this nonconsensually. and one of bams core personality traits is his kindness and politness, and he's been in kayas shoes before, albeit not for queerness specifically. bam isnt a participant, bam is a fucking reward and object and just as that one guy calling khun a "cute little kitten" while literally discussing how much his worth as a slave would be isnt queer rep, neither is this! even if the two of them are actually gay and actually attracted to the two respectfully, they still treat them as objects to be sold or bought for political advantage. someone on tumblr once said that a drag queen will always be a better ally than a gay ceo, and! yeah!

anyways, in conclusion, this is at worst an accidental bigoted caricature, and at best a very good joke on all of us. source im gay intersex trans and i actually go outside and interact with real queer people instead of having pronoun discourse on tiktok. thanks

#tower of god #i am SOOOO fucking sleepy #also one day ill write a ramble on why i think bamdorsi arent a good couple. controversial ig #like its cute but... no...#anyways this thjng has had a grip on me for two and a half years now im not going anywhere ily siu💞

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dr-piss-thief-phd · 6 months

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Popping it under the cut so I don’t spoil anyone but hmm I have some Opinions on the new Doctor Who episode

So uh yeah let’s start off with what I liked!

GOSH it made my heart so full to have an open, obvious, visible, loved and supported trans character!!!! To be sat in the same room as my parents and have them see that!! The fact that Rose being trans was treated so normal and natural and that there was the little things that showed what it’s like both the bad and the good. It’s something that means a lot to so many people, myself included, and AAAA!!! I’m so glad!!!

The Donna and Doctor duo together again aaaaa <3 Both gave an amazing performance as always and I was so hyped to see them both together again!

The whole Meep thing….. I might wait until ive watched again until I pull it all apart and form a more solid opinion on it, but I think it was a pretty interesting and funny monster of the week. Looked a little too much like a Gremlin for me tho.

Right. Onto the bits I have some Thoughts™ on…

Now, don’t get me wrong. I love the themes and I think they are so important and it really was amazing to have being trans saving the day but…. Both the writer in me and the non-binary person in me are a little bit iffy about a lot of it. I just think towards the end it could have benefited from having a little bit more subtlety to it?

For starters the line about assuming pronouns honestly put me a little on edge. Even though it was Rose saying it, it was pretty much the exact wording of how we as a queer community get mocked with that sort of thing. And to have the queer character in an episode that is already bound to get all the dickheads frothing at the mouth say it just feels like it’s reinforcing that stereotype??

Also. The whole “binary, binary” “non-binary” line. I won’t lie. It made me cringe. Idk. Maybe it’s because as a non-binary person myself I still have some unpacking of internalised bullshit to do but it just felt weird. A little forced maybe (I’m not sure if that’s what I mean but, it’s a similar feeling?? Idk I’m tired). ALSO the whole binary binary binary binary thing is a reference to something else other than binary in regards to gender ?? It felt kinda annoying to be like “they did the thing they did the reference!!” for them to immediately try and change the meaning of it???

Okay I’m getting too tired and my thoughts too muddled so I’m leaving it here. Sorry for half an essay to anyone who reads this idk idk goodnight

#random ramblings #doctor who spoilers

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psychiatricwarfare · 2 years

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The reason that disabled people know more than the abled "experts" is that only the disabled are truly humans. All abled are born irrevocably ableist, and are therefore the enemy.

im gonna take this lovely opportunity to rant about this bc ure absolutely right (n b4 the ableds kill me, yes yall r human obviously, u just treat us as subhuman which is a disgusting and inhumane thing to do, which is what i believe anon was getting at). now then, abled people listen up, even if ure an "ally" bc this applies to u too

probably gonna piss off the ableds w this one but tbh i dont think ive ever met an abled person i genuinely got along with, every true friend ive ever had has been disabled in some way, not to mention literally like my whole family is mentally and/or physically disabled. abled ppl tend to abuse/take advantage of disabled people even if they dont mean to bc of their ableism and toxic positivity

unfortunately ableism isnt just a problem w the abled, since they rule the world, their ableism seeps into the minds of disabled youth and creates internalised ableism and its genuinely very sad. the worst part is most abled people dont think theyre ableist either, they think they're "helping" us or whatever the fuck meanwhile they use us as inspiration porn when we can do something and shame us when we cant

dear abled people, we just want you to listen to us, actually listen. we know more about our disabilities than you ever will, we know ourselves better than you, we understand what its like to live with whatever condition(s) we may have. You Do Not. idc if you think you know best, idc if you think you're "helping". telling us 'you can do it!' or 'you should do [x]' or to 'just try harder' is Not helping us

chances are, we've already tried whatever suggestions you might think of. unless we ASK for help, or you ask us if you can help and we say yes & tell you how, Do Not try to help us. if you think we're struggling with something, ask us if we need help, if we say yes then ask how you can help, if we say no then dont try to help. its really that simple

if you want to be a good ally to disabled people, then you have to talk to disabled people and listen to what we have to say. every single disabled person is different, even those with the exact same condition(s). please remember that, we are not a monolith, you need to Listen To Us

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