#its kinda !!??!?!! skipping between so much good and dealing with coming out of so much bad
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Miķelis
Now Playing: Alkaline by Sleep Token
Length: 4,558 words, ~20-25 minute read
Summary: It'd be such a shame if I just left my terrace window open on a hot night to let the breeze in and some big, half human-half tentacle monster comes in through the window, clearly aroused, and sees my wet and loose hole and breeds me in my sleep. Noooo, I'd hate for that to happen!
kinda like doc ock but its natural//part of his body and he's more alien-like 😊
CW: vaginal fingering, masturbation, somnophilia, somno breeding, breeding, tentacle monster/monster sex, cervix penetration, oviposition, rapid pregnancy?, uhhhh idk I’m doing this in order of appearance lolz, egg laying I guess? Idk what you'd call it. also lactation? But it's not really milk, but I guess it's still lactation.
It'd be such a shame if I just left my terrace window open on a hot night to let the breeze in and some big, half human-half tentacle monster comes in through the window, clearly aroused, and sees my wet and loose hole and breeds me in my sleep. Noooo, I'd hate for that to happen!
It's really hot out here in the woodlands of Texas, and my little cottage on the edge of the woods just can't keep up and everything is hot. I don't live particularly close to anyone, so I can go around all day in scantily short dresses or just my lingerie and not worry about anyone seeing me. Some days I just put a little skirt on and skip the panties, just a skirt and a light top you can see my nipples through.
But anyway, it's that time of the summer where it's not even cold at night - you're lucky if it gets down to 80 now. So I go to bed with most of my windows open, hoping it'll bring more air through.
But I don't just go to bed that night, no no no. It was a hot day, I had a few stressful work calls, I need to relax. I've had a few glasses of wine with my dinner, and I have a little left to sip on, so I pull out a small bottle of lube and my rabbit vibrator, my favorite at the moment.
I sigh out a little in relief. I've needed this for far too long at this point. I lube up my fingers and push two in at first. It feels almost foreign with how long it's been since I've been able to give my pussy a little love.
I add a third finger and start trying to loosely separate them, stretching myself open slowly. The slight burn from being out of practice makes this all the more worth it.
I'm getting a little wetter at the provocation, I can't help but smile at the wetness growing between my legs. I think I can use my rabbit now.
I grab my little rabbit and get it in position, slowly thrusting it into myself for the first time in probably a month. I moan out for a man that isn’t there.
I turn up the speed on my vibrator, letting it sit in me for a second, I’m too sensitive to thrust it in yet. Even then, it still feels so good. I needed this. I move it around a little, gasping at the pleasure it brings. God, if only someone else were doing this to me.
I thrust it in faster, panting at the relief it brings. I’m almost at the edge, it’s almost there, I can feel it pooling in my stomach, oh god, oh god oh god oh-
I’m squirting on my fingers and my rabbit before I know it. It was all too much, but I still want more.
I should stop before I’m too sore to work in my garden tomorrow. I turn off and slowly pull my rabbit out, sighing as I get up to clean it. If someone else were here, I wouldn’t have to lift a finger for my aftercare. But here I am, I just fucked my own brains out with a toy and I have administer my own aftercare. How fun.
I wash it of my juices and leave it in the bathroom, I can deal with it tomorrow. For now, though, I lay back down and dim my flower lamp, dusting the room in a pink hue.
I must’ve been sleeping for a few hours when the looming creature creeps in through my wide open bedroom window. He’s tall, at least six-foot-five, dark green in color that fades to a light green at the end of his extremities, and he carries this musk with him; we’re miles from the ocean but I smell the salt and the sand when he enters my room.
But the big thing, though, is that it’s mating season for his kind. He’s been looking for a human to mate with for weeks, and the longer he waits, the more desperate and deranged he becomes. He needs someone to carry his clutch. Now.
And I guess I’m the first easy womb he’s found to harbor his clutch in.
He creeps over, silent and imposing, and looks down at my stretched hole. She played with herself, he thinks absentmindedly. He doesn’t care if I was stretched or not, his slick tentacles would open me up well enough for his eggs.
He growls as his need increases. He needs this now. He grows out two tentacles to wrap around and spread each leg by the ankles, leaving no room for a fight if I wake up. Two more grow from him and stretch out my arms. He gets closer, letting some smaller tentacles trail up my thighs and caress my love handles.
After mapping out my body, he wraps one large tentacle around my waist, keeping me in place as he moves to insert one questioning tendril into my loose cunt.
He makes a lewd sound at the feeling of my walls, excited to have finally found a mate. He thrusts in further, curling round and mapping my womb.
I think this is when I wake up - a rather slimy tentacle all the way in my pussy, pushing against my cervix, and all my limbs and waist being held down by these larger tentacles with suction cups rather than little pores that drip slick. I open my eyes, hoping this is just a dream. I scream when I see his shadowy figure above me, multiple eyes staring at me. A tentacle, small at the tip but quite large at the base - almost as large as the one around my waist - comes straight for my open mouth and shoves itself down my throat. It immediately starts secreting the same fluid that’s being pushed around in my womb, calming and clouding my mind, maybe this is okay. Maybe I do want this.
I have no say when the slick starts leaking from the corners of my mouth, and I have no other choice but to swallow. It’s warm - I think it warms to my body - and it’s sweet, like strawberries and chocolates sweet. Once those first drops are down my throat I can’t help but suckle on the tentacle in my mouth. It just tastes so sweet!
He slides a second, smaller tentacle into my wet pussy - is the liquid an aphrodisiac? I don’t remember going to bed or waking up this wet, I think to myself. This one gushes more of the liquid and helps to stretch my hole open with the other one to let more tentacles in. God, how many is he gonna put in me?
He slowly slides two or three small tentacles in at a time, I don’t know how many, but when he stops, I’m completely full and can barely move. Just as I think he’s finished with the tentacles, he slides one more in, but this one is different from the other ones in and on my body. This one’s cold, large, equipped with both pores and suction cups, and is rather round and larger at the tip, not tapered off like the others. I whimper at the fullness.
And then he starts moving them around, in and out, thrusting in at different speeds.
He finally makes a sound, he shushes me as the tendril in my mouth pumps out more liquid than before. I sigh at getting the sweet aphrodisiac in a larger amount.
I’m getting close, so so close. All of his tendrils are hitting each and every nerve I have, setting my entire body on fire with pleasure. I start moaning a little louder around the tentacle in my mouth, maybe he’ll like the vibrations.
He does. He love it. He starts excreting more of the fluid into my mouth and my womb, making everything hotter and my mind a little more absent. He thrusts all the tendrils in my womb a little harder, a little faster.
Just as I think it couldn’t get any better, I feel a small, completely slick tentacle prodding at my ass. It’s looking for entrance elsewhere. He prods in slowly, hesitantly, making sure he doesn’t hurt his brooder too much.
Once the tentacle is nicely and comfortably moving around in my ass, I come from it all. I’m moaning and shaking, taking in more of the aphrodisiac. Within minutes of me cumming it’s almost like it never happened, I want more from him.
I feel a few more tentacles slowly make way to be with the one in my ass, pumping me with more of his slick. God it feels so good.
He leaves one small tentacle out to play with my clit, he lets it circle and suck on my nub. Two more slither up my body, leaving a trail of slick as they move, up to my breasts. They lightly touch around and move to suction onto my nipples, and I moan loudly at the feeling.
Apparently, once all of his tentacles are where they should be, I’m too loud for him. He stuffs the tentacle down my throat a little farther and starts pumping more of his liquid out.
“Shhh, shhh, I got you, shhhh, shhh. You’ll look so nice brooding my clutch” he whispers. He’s got a heavy accent, but it’s not one I’ve ever heard. Almost like it’s from a language most don’t speak. I try to look into his eyes, but as he looms over me - blocking out most light - I can barely make out his dark sets of orbs. I hope I’m looking at him, I want him to know I want more.
The limbs in my ass and my womb start moving faster, dripping more and more slick into me as he grunts a little louder. The oddly shaped one starts prodding at my cervix - it wants entry.
Everything becomes too much again, and as I feel his tentacle breach my cervix, I cum a second time from him, moaning loudly at the feeling. I slightly push the tendril out of my throat with my sounds, and it recedes back out to his back.
I mewl at the emptiness, I didn’t want him to leave! He swoops in and crashes our lips together, his slick and our saliva mixing. His tongue - much like his tentacles - slithers it’s way into my mouth - feeling what his tendril was just seconds ago. Can he not feel with his tentacles? I’m sure he can, he grunts when I squeeze my walls around him, he acted in tandem with me. Maybe it feels different.
Just as he’s about to pull away, I feel the tentacle that breached my cervix start to expand, like it’s hollowing around something. And sure enough, a few seconds go by and I feel something plop into my womb, followed by another, and another and another and another-
There’s got to be at least 20 small plops that go by before I zone out, totally in love with the feeling. I look down at my stomach, watching it inflate. His hand reaches out to cup my womb, slowly caressing it and cooing at me. I smile at the feeling of truly being full for the first time in my life.
I zone back in when I feel the tentacles in my ass start to pull out, slowly and one by one as to not hurt me. He starts pulling out the ones in my cunt, too. I whine at being empty.
“Shhh, pretty girl, you won't be empty for long” he whispers against my ear, the only tentacle left in me is the one in my womb now. It’s still pumping, my stomachs still swelling.
When it stops swelling, he goes to tear it off.
“What, what what do you think you’re doing? Why are you cutting it off?” I ask. They’re the first words out of my mouth to him, my voice shot from the tentacle that was down my throat.
“It’s customary. So you don’t worry about the clutch inside of you, and they also have both parents with them.” He grunts out as he finally tears it off. He doesn’t bleed from it, I guess it is customary for breeding.
“Sleep, grow my clutch dear brooder. I’ll be back tomorrow.” He whispers as he gets up to leave. He uncurls the tendrils from my body and stands up from where he was on my bed. I whimper at being cold and alone now.
He circles around to the side and puts a tentacle back in my throat. I accept it immediately, letting it settle heavy on my tongue. It starts pumping out a different tasting liquid, this one tastes like how honeysuckle smells. I start nodding off to the taste of it.
I wake up hours later than usual, the sun is almost right above me when I wake up. It’s got to be at least 10:30 now.
The tentacle is gone from my mouth, but the one he cut off is still sitting in my cunt, fully extended to my womb. My womb is completely filled and extended, the skin taught from how many eggs are inside me. I see a small note, a pair of scissors, and a glass of water on my bedside table as I swerve to the side to stand up.
Don’t take the tentacle out, just cut it so it doesn’t impede your movement. I'll take it out when I get there. See you tonight.
-Miķelis
I smile, rubbing my large belly. I wonder what’ll happen tonight. I cut the excess off, leaving maybe an inch to grab it with, and throw it in the trash can by bed.
I stand up, hearing my knees pop and my back moan in pain from the sudden added weight. I guess I can't work in the garden today. There goes my Saturday.
I waddle to my kitchen to make breakfast, but I honestly don't have much energy to do that. All I want to do is get back in bed and snuggle up until Miķelis gets here tonight.
After breakfast, I go freshen up (get all the slick off of my body) and lay back down. I find a small little cup and a second note on my other bedside table.
Drink this about an hour before sundown, it'll make tonight easier.
-Miķelis
It smells nice, almost exactly like the first liquid he pumped into me last night. Maybe it is that liquid? Who knows, but I want to listen to him, so I turn on my other side and settle down.
I wake up again a few hours later, it's about two in the afternoon now. My stomach is larger, its moving a little, and I feel an insatiable heat in my cunt. I can't even reach my clit to play with myself. I whine in frustration, getting up to get my small bullet vibrator from the drawer. That'll do the trick.
"Ohhh, Oh my god! Miķelis!!!" I moan out when i squat down to the lower drawer where my vibrator is. Everything just moved inside me and everything hurts. The tentacle almost starts sliding out. I quickly grab my bullet vibrator waddle to go grab some panties to keep the tentacle and vibrator in place for when I lay back down.
Putting on panties is harder than it seems when you can't reach your cunt or see most of your legs for that matter, but once I get them on, I waddle quickly back to bed. I need this more than I needed it last night.
I push the tendril back in, sighing at the comfort it brings to have something so stable in me. I slide the bullet into my panties and turn it on, mewling at the pleasure it brings. Nowhere near what Miķelis gave me last night, but it'll do until he gets here.
As the bullet buzzes away, I go to play with my breasts. When my hands cup them, though, I notice they're a little larger than they were last night. They seem, I don't know, heavier? Like they're filled with something? Oh my god, oh!! What if they're filled with milk for our clutch? Do his eggs even need milk? Ooooh is that what's going to happen tonight? Is that why he's coming back?
I cum quickly when I pinch my nipples. They're so tender right now! I sigh and turn down the bullet, letting it go at a small hum on my clit. I go back to sleep.
When I wake up again, it's about 30 minutes before sundown, a little later than when he said I should drink whatever's in the small cup. The bullet turned off, so I turn it back on at the low hum it was at. It feels nice to have a small distraction.
I quickly swallow down whatever he gave me, it tastes like a mix of the strawberries and chocolate aphrodisiac with something else, not the honeysuckle, but something equally sweet. Raspberry? Jasmine. It think it's jasm-
My cunt starts spasming out of nowhere, and I've noticed a few things:
My stomach is at least twice it's size that was earlier.
my bedsheets have become extremely wet - as if I poured the entire ocean on them wet.
My breasts are leaking something that looks like milk
I think I'm contracting?
Do I start pushing? Do I take the tentacle out? He said not to take the tentacle out until he got here, what do I do what do I do?? Damn Miķelis, giving me the best night of my life just to leave me alone. But he's coming, he's just not here right now! That's all!
I'm writhing on the bed for what feels like days before I see that it's completely dark outside now. Miķelis should be here soon. Please show up. I don't think I can do this alone.
I whimper a little louder and feel the tentacle slowly start moving outward, something's pushing it out from the inside. I push it back in, I can't not do one of the two things Miķelis asked of me, I can't upset this man.
Just as I start crying, I see him in the corner of my doorway. He rushes in when he hears me in full.
"Shhhh, shhh shhh, dolly, it's okay, I'm here now. Let's move you to the bathroom dear, my eggs need to be hatched in water." He whispers as he holds me. He picks me up and coos silently on the way to my bathroom. How does he know the layout to my house?
He sets me down in the bathtub and starts the water. He lets it get to a warm temperature before closing the stopper and letting it fill. As it nears my breasts, he stops the water and helps me onto the large ledge.
"Oops, sorry dear, I didn't see you had panties on" he chuckles softly as he pulls them off. The vibrator falls into the tub -thank god it's meant to be submerged - and he turns it off and chucks it onto the bathroom counter. He does the same with my panties.
"I'm so happy you listened to my directions, dear, both for the tentacle and the drink. Women have tried to take it out before, it never does end well." he whispers as he rubs my belly. I whimper at his words.
The lights are on in the bathroom, and I finally get a good look at him. He is indeed tall, and only his tentacles - which I only see eight right now - are the dark to light green ombré. He's got dark brown hair, olive skin, and his eyes match his tentacles - one's dark green and the other's light green. He doesn't have a plethora of eyes like I thought, only two. Why did I think he had multiple sets of eyes?
The contractions start at a heavier pace now, and he pulls the tentacle out. He places it in the tub.
He coos at me and rubs my belly a little more, telling me it'll be okay. I hope it will be.
He tells me to start pushing, and I can't not listen to him. A tentacle wraps around my chest, just above my nipples to keep me upright.
I push, I feel them moving closer to my entrance.
A few more pushes, and the first small egg makes it's way to crowning. He slips a tentacle into my mouth and tells me to suck. A second one makes it's way to my clit and circles around it. I moan at the comfort his tentacles bring me.
The liquid starts pouring out into my mouth, and I feel myself loosening up as I drink up more of it. I hear the first egg plop out, followed quickly by the second, and the third, fourth fifth sixth seven-
At least 20 small eggs have slipped out of my loose hole before I start crying a little louder. How many are there? How many did he put in me?
It finally stops at 36, and I slump into his tentacles, letting him do what he pleases with my body.
By now, it's at least an hour after sundown, probably around nine or a little after. He carries me back to bed and lays me down, letting me catch my breath.
When I've finally caught my breath, I feel a slew of tentacles prodding at my loose cunt, not forcing themselves in yet, but asking for entrance.
I sigh around the tendril in my mouth. I try to say yes around it, he can shove them in me and make me his brooder again. He smiles, he got the memo.
I'm loose from last night and just giving birth to his clutch, so he easily slides three or more in at once. I feel the ovipositor tendril come in with a second bulk of them this time. It's already regrown? This one feels larger though?
"It regrows quickly during mating season. And you can take a larger clutch this time dear, you can take a larger tentacle for it. It grows with each mating session." He explains. I guess I looked a little confused.
A few tentacles ask for entrance at my ass again, and again, I let him in. There's still some entering my loose pussy, but not as many as there were earlier.
The remaining go up to cup my still leaking breasts, the tentacles immediately go to suckle on my nipples. Two more go to cup the underside of them.
I guess he doesn't feel the need to tie me up this time. I like that. I move my arms to wrap around his neck to get closer to him, I want to breathe his ocean scent in.
He smiles and puts a hand on my back to bring me in closer, the other on my neck to keep a good hold of me. He leans in to whisper.
"You are meant to be a breeder, dear. You'll take every single clutch I give you and won't let a single egg spoil. You make such a good brooder, sweetie. You're the best brooder I've ever had. You're my only brooder for this season, I swear to you. You'll be my only brooder for every other season.
What a good slut, deary. Taking all I give you and still begging for more. I couldn't help myself when I smelled your sex last night. You just had to keep your windows open, just had to tempt me. Now look at you, begging for a second clutch to take care of."
I whimper as I cum around his tentacles again, he just makes me feel so good. I can't stop myself this time, I feel myself adding to the wetness around us. I'm gushing around his multiple cocks. I hide my face in his neck as best I can with the tentacle in my mouth when he speeds up. I think the aphrodisiac numbs pain, too.
The tentacles in my ass move at a different pace than the ones in my cunt, and I whimper a little louder at the sensation. The tendril in my mouth pumps more liquid to calm me. God do I love the taste of it. Can't that be the only thing I drink for the rest of my life?
The tentacles in my cunt speed up, and I feel the ovipositor tendril make its way for my cervix again. Already? I can't complain, but it feels like no time has passed at all. But he doesn't move to breach yet, he simply straddles it there.
More and more of the liquid is pumping into all of my holes, he's pounding my cunt and my ass, and my mouth is full. It feels like I didn't just cum and I'm already cumming again. I'm gushing against him and I feel his smile even with my eyes closed. I whimper a little louder, everything alive with fire but dull at the same time.
He pulls out the tentacle from my mouth and moves to kiss me as the ovipositor breaches my cervix. I cry out loudly as it happens and he smothers me with the kiss. I feel the all the other tentacles still and the ovipositor start pumping eggs into me again. I sigh quietly, it already feels comforting and constant even if it's the second time. I smile into his lips at the thought.
The clutch he pumps into me is larger than the last ones, if only by a little bit. It still feels jarring, though. I don't think 36 will fit this time if they're larger.
I whimper at being full once again, happy at being at this point again. He pulls away from my lips and smiles at me, moving us back down onto the bed flat, letting a had move to my stomach and leaving the other to still rest at my neck. It moves to cup my jaw.
He stops pumping me to take his other tentacles out, slowly, knowing even though I like this, my body still isn't fully acclimated to it. Once they're all out, he again cuts off his ovipositor. I whimper at being empty again.
This time, though, instead of getting up and putting me to sleep, he shushes me and tells me he'll be right back. He comes back with a glass of water and lays down with me. Is he staying this time? Oh I hope he stays this time!
He holds the glass for me as I take small gulps, smiling down at my large belly. It's a little larger than it started at last time, god it's gonna be a bad night tomorrow if they're that big. But it's only gonna get bigger and more painful from here. Who cares, hopefully I'll acclimate.
He moves us around to spoon, moving his arms to be wrapped around my full belly. I smile at the gesture.
I really hope he does this all mating season.
I have wanted to write tentacle sex for so long, and this one could go on forever, but I mean it'd just repeat after this.
Not super edited, sorry for any mistakes
Again, if you actually got to the end of this, why don't you stay for a while? I got some other works in the making at the moment and chances are if you've found my posts you'll like the stuff i repost. Just a thought :)
Creds to @/cafekitsune for the dividers ♡
#somno breeding#monster fuxker marya#tentacles#terato#monster fucker#ovipositor#cervix penetration#lactation#rapid pregnancy#i hate tags#breeding k1nk#Spotify
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HP characters when their s/o's tired
DISCLAIMER: I do not support JK Rowling :)
also! accepting requests so please send them. drabble or headcanon requests prefered but if something perks my interest you might get more lmao- anyways this took so long, lmk if you want any other characters you want for this
Lightning Era:
Harry
honestly clueless
kid wasn't socialized at a young age
basically you either have to be asleep or tell him
lets say you fall asleep on him
freezes
harry.exe has stopped working
honestly tho he's probably vaguely confused
like he was just having a conversation with you
and now you're asleep??
heh??
next thing running through his mind is how cute you are
i mean he mainly sees you during like class and stuff
rarely does he see you as relaxed as you are asleep
he's kinda in love or something idk
looks to Hermione for help
she doesn't help him at all
eventually shakes you awake
makes you go to bed earlier than him tho
makes sure you get there safely
honestly thinks about the situation for the next week
at some point tells you that you can sleep on him whenever
#--#
Ron
another clueless boy
honestly no ones fault except for his
he’s just Ronald what else can I say
anyways
someone probably points it out that you're asleep
that someone is probably Hermione
kid doesn't even know what to do
like stares and kind of zones out
will wake you up
probably kind of makes fun of you
I mean kid comes from a big household of course he does
jokes about how late you stay up like he doesn't also stay up late
if you get pouty he'll melt and like escort you back to his dorm
i guess you're both skipping class
#--#
Hermione
the best one here
knows all of the signs of you getting tired
immediately suggests you go take a nap if possible
if you randomly get tired like midday?
she's checking in on you in between classes
will share notes with you if you're too tired to take them
only if she knows you got a good nights sleep the night before
or were up like her studying or working on essays
work is always an excuse for tiredness
will give you power snacks
if you're a coffee drinker-
will let you drink coffee later than usual only to stay awake
she usually cuts you off at lunch :(
overall she's supportive and here to help
unless you stayed up doing something dumb, you're on your own then :))
#--#
Draco
notices and literally does nothing /j
for real though he won't like make a big deal out of it or anything
if you guys are in class he'll notice but not
makes sure to make an extra copy of notes for you though
if its just like at the dining hall or like in the common room tho
he's nicer when you guys are more secluded
will like push your head on his shoulder or like tell you to sleep on him
might lightly scold you
but overall very sweet about everything
if its late he'll straight up just take you to his dorm to go to bed
like he changes and has some of your pj's in his room
pretty much cuddle town
he might read to you and play with your hair if he's not super tired
that's the real treat tbh
#--#
Fred
this mf
honestly mean about it
will 100% make fun of you
you cannot tell me that this boy wouldn't
he might be cute but he's an asshole
especially during classes
he will throw paper balls at you if he notices you dozing off
will not help you with academics at all
if you miss it you miss it ig
if you guys are in the common room he's nicer
will sneak you coffee out of the kitchens
doesn't really like to cuddle during the day
yk he has too many pranks to pull and plan
but he will let you like cuddle him while he plans with George
I feel like if its late though he'll not hesitate to sleep
like I feel like once he gets tired he's gone
so if your both tired be happy cause you're getting your way :)
#--#
George
he's nicer than his brother but not that nice
will still mock you but if he sees you getting tiredly upset??
its over- he's done teasing and he's hugging you
will be the type to drop everything and nap with you
if you're tired during classes?
he's carrying your books
making sure you're staying awake
at least enough to be able to do the homework later
he's honestly really sweet about stuff
will let you skip dinner to nap and then bring you food later
or maybe even sneak you into the kitchen later
also if you're a coffee addict
like myself
best boyfriend ever
will give you coffee and makes it perfectly every time
doesn't have the heart to cut you off at anytime
honestly though I love him a lot :)
#--#
Oliver
this little shit
omg
he really needs to not
he's one of those people who like never sleeps but is never tired
just because he's so busy
like mans is a good student
he's also committed his life to quidditch so
he doesn't get much sleep
will often make you stay up with him
and then gets confused as to why you're tired
literally does not have a single clue
he will get you coffee if you want it
he likes to do things for you so he babys you when you're tired
another one that carries your stuff for you
wont let you slack off though
you're doing all of your own work
but of course he'll help you, he just might give you shit for it
overall sweet but clueless
#harry potter x reader#ron weasley x reader#hermione granger x reader#draco x reader#fred weasley x reader#george weasley x reader#oliver wood x reader#draco malfoy x reader#aure writes
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i have been silent but that does not mean i have stopped thinking about dottore
based off of some fanart i saw, im like. 99.9999% sure zandik rarely heard any nice stuff said to him n i dont know why but i just. imagine this in my head. its such a tender, vulnerable and soft moment where zandik, probably akademiya or early fatui days, fits himself between your legs as he wraps his arms around your waist. his head laying comfortably on your thighs as he sits on his knees. its a moment that shows his trust, you know? allowing himself to be small before you, a rare act of submission to your love as your fingers play with his curls, palms warm and soothing as you cup his cheek. n' u just tell him things that he struggles to believe, like how he's so beautiful, and that you care about him, how he deserves to be loved even though he's perceived as a monster. and i dont know, but i wanna gently raise his head by his chin, softly smile at him and say "zandik, you're a good boy." because i know no one has ever ever said that to him, not even his parents.
healing his parental issues frrrr 💪💪💪 IS. IS THIS WEIRD??? IDK IT KINDA SOUNDS WEIRD BUT I DONT KNOW, IN MY HEAD THIS IS JUST. EVERYTHIN FOR ME.
this is just how i imagine zandik, honestly I DONT KNOW WHY BUT THE FANART I SAW FUCKS ME UP AND I WANNA CARE FOR HIM AND PAMPER HIM AND MAKE HIM FEEL THINGS NO ONE CARES ENOUGH TO MAKE HIM FEEL.
i want that boy to be treated like a pretty girl by taking him out on romantic dates and writing him love letters he's 100000% gonna keep, laminate and immortalize. i want to treat that boy like the fragile thing he is, hold him in my arms and kiss him so so gently.
ITS DRIVING ME NUTS.
oh yeah. totally not projecting onto zandik. NOPE. nuh uh. totallllyyyy....
THAT MENTAL IMAGE YOU'VE GIVEN ME... oh my gosh. i am so soft right now. Sniff sob... Zandik being so open and vulnerable in front of you :( OH EDBEWDWE HIM IN THAT POSITION IS MAKING ME CRY HE'S SO CUTE... you have no clue how you managed to get him to be so submissive but you're not going to say anything nor are you going to squander this opportunity. You're not even sure if he's comfortable like that, sitting on his knees but... he seems unbothered and quite actually, content with nuzzling his face into your thighs, having your hands run through his fluffy blue hair soothingly. For once, he is almost eerily silent, instead of being all fight and rebuttal all the time, as he doesn't seem to have a smart answer for your gentle words this time. It's new to you, not him vehemently denying your statements, but you're going to take advantage of it, holding his cheeks and kissing him all over, whispering in his ear softly but firmly about how much you love him and everything you love about him, and that you always will.
CALLING HIM A GOOD BOY... i am on the floor in a puddle and sobbing. Kai your brain >>> peak. But it makes me so sad to know that Zandik's literally never received any kind of positive form of affection all his life 😭 Not even his parents... like fuck I'm in pain for him. It took reader SO long to even break his first wall down (he has like a dozen probably) because of how poorly he was treated by the people who were supposed to "love" him :( he just really needs some love :( i think after a really long time, Zandik would come to really crave your appreciation sometimes. Like, he doesn't make it obvious or anything, but he'll do something like perhaps deal with some fellow scholars without snapping at them, or anything he doesn't really do in general, and look at you expectantly if you haven't praised him yet. Because you're the only one who has ever praised his efforts.
HE DESERVES TO BE PAMPERED SO BAD 😭😭 ugh i know Sumeru is mostly hot and you two can't have any cold bundled up days over there but. i love the idea of you two snuggling and sleeping in one morning. Both of you know you're gonna be late for class, but you're like, fuck it we're skipping. And Zandik scolds you, but he's making no effort to leave either! So... you two just stay in bed cuddling as you pamper him (you definitely were the big spoon quite frequently back then here 😭) Slow and lazy morning as you wash his hair and body in the bathe 🥺 breakfast that you made as he looks over his notes 🥺
Bro i can't even imagine Zandik's reaction to you trying to treat him like a pretty princess 😭 Even when you two are dating he just doesn't understand :( why do you go so far for him? What he gives you in return is far less than what you provide for him... he just doesn't understand, but it seems like you're wholly content with everything the way it is so... he won't let you go.
#smooches talks#moots: kai <3#dottore love notes <3#that image is the exact representation of me as well#AND DONT WORRY THIS WASNT WEIRD AT ALL!! i love it *hugs u* i will come and wrap u up in a blanket burrito myself#again this is zandik learning that not every relationship is transactional
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Do you think Soda has PTSD from his dad?
(Wonder if u two are mind linked lol)
Short answer: I'm not sure about flashbacks or other PTSD symptoms since Im not an expert on it; *I* dont usually have it in mind per se, but objectively it's very possible and understandable.
(Warning: gonna talk about parental abuse. Obviously. But only in the context of the effects it might have, no real descriptions of violence)
Long answer: I think Soudas relationship with his dad is one of those messy, awful, complicated ones that you might not really understand until years later, when you've gotten some distance.
I think he says that he used to stay home during field trips and class events, because his dad was kinda poor and Souda didn't want him to have to field the expenses; but instead of just saying that, he just kinda. Didn't go. And got beat for it. So he might have not felt safe just saying "I'm gonna skip school because it's cheaper" (not to generalize but, Fathers and feeling like they're not considered Head of House / Full Provider, amiright). A little bit of "I gotta do things right and if I dont do them right then it's bad news but it's fine because I'll just do it better next time".
I think he wanted, generally, to have a good relationship with his dad and be helpful- trying to save money, helping out at their workshop/garage, just kinda hanging out, etc. Like he actually wanted to and thought he could have a great father/son thing going on if he just tried a little harder or did things a little differently, changed himself a little, never really thinking of talking it out or telling anyone- because it's not so bad and he can totally handle it! And it's not like he gets his ass beat every day it's only occasionally (when he fucks up) and in between, they actually have a good time together sometimes! His dad is like, almost his friend! And his dad does keep him fed and clothed and supports his passion (and his very good at reminding Souda that he should be thankful) so it's NO Big Deal. Just like his ex-best-friend throwing him under the bus was no big deal, just as long as no one starts ignoring him or leaving him out or kicking him out of the house its FINE.
That's why he talks about it so casually, because it's fine, and its only once he has enough distance from the situation and gets to hear different perspectives that he's like, oh, that was messed up actually.
Like, Hajime and Sonia both seem shocked, but they come from such a different background so its okay that they dont get it- but Fuyuhiko gets furious about it too, and while his parents sucked they never actually beat him- and Akane has been through A Damn Lot but even she seems really uncomfortable with the idea that okay yeah Soudas dad beat the shit out of him a few times (it's the Big Sister in her).
And just like, with time and good friends around, I can see Souda having moments where he just remembers something he used to think nothing of and goes "wait that was fucked up actually??" Like, they're just fishing or something, and he goes "hey... did your parents ever try to convince you something didn't happen when it probably definitely did?" And depending on who he asks the answer is different, but generally its "nnnno?" and he's like "oh ..... that's kinda messed up isnt it?" Yes, Souda, it is messed up.
And he might have reactions and ideas that he didn't think about too much when he was still in his home situation, like his general fearfulness and jumpiness, being convinced people might turn on him, being kind of a people-pleaser sometimes, flinching excessively around certain noises or movements, being quick to cower and cover his head, etc, quick to latch onto people who are any kind of nice to him. Stuff that's just kind of his personality by now, but he probably got it from somewhere.
I'm not an expert tho and I won't armchair diagnose or anything, this is just my personal interpretation.
(According to A Therapist that stuff is not classified as PTSD symptoms if it's not accompanied by flashbacks or painful memories / stuff you actively try not to remember, but what do I know)
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Am I the only RWBY hater legitimately happy they're addressing Ruby's trauma and her constant shoving it under the 'i'm a happy dappy shounen protag! you can lean on me!' rug. If it fucks it up I don't think I'll even be too mad - The Owl House fucked theirs up and that's one of the best new shows out. The fact they actually had Ruby faint as her literally shutting down to the new information was neat to me. So tbh despite the rest of the episode being, lmao, bad, I kind of want to be happy and expectant based off that alone. If the focus of the volume really is zeroing in on Ruby's mental health (which it definitely is squaring up to be) I'm kind of interested what they'll do.
You're far from the only one, anon! I'm cautiously hopeful, based primarily on that opening. The fact that we've got Ruby lagging behind the group alongside, our trailer with her past doppelganger seemingly judging her, tells me that yeah, we are squaring up to tackle this. Which is great!
It's also, honestly, kinda frustrating. I was saying years ago that if RWBY finally gets its act together it'll be too little too late in many respects and now we're bumping up against that very problem. I have trouble taking Ruby's trauma seriously when it was nearly nonexistent post-Penny's first death and actually nonexistent after her resurrection. I especially have a hard time taking it seriously when it's book-ended by cutsey mice and vine gags. I'd argue that on one level RWBY already has fucked up Ruby's mental health arc, simply by letting it languish for eight years and introducing the core of it in that mess of a premiere... but that's not to say that there won't still be worthwhile aspects this season, even if the arc isn't all that it could have been.
I'm also just so, so wary after Volume 8. Because Volume 7 had so much going for it. We had the same basic setup of, "This is nowhere near perfect because we had too many problems going into the season, but damn if what they're doing with Ironwood and the team isn't interesting!" And then that crashed and burned so very hard. Obviously that's not to say RWBY will fail again to follow up on what they've introduced, but history hasn't made me particularly optimistic.
Tomorrow is going to be pretty crucial imo. Because Ruby's faint - while yes, emphasizing her shock and tendency to, in this case, literally shut down - is also an easy way to dodge her having a more complex, nuanced reaction. The premiere dodged that further by going, "Ruby says she's fine and conveniently the girls aren't gonna push her about that. Oh look! The episode needs to end now." So tomorrow's 15-20 minute chunk is when the story has to start actually doing something with this revelation - whatever that looks like. If Ruby begins to deal with his somehow (because remember, we only have 9 episodes left), fantastic, we're on our way through a potentially satisfying arc. But if we continue to waste time on silly jokes while Ruby just remains perpetually in this state of, "I'm fine, no need to grapple with what I'm dealing with" - which, notably, has basically been her default state since Volume 3 - then I'm worried we'll get another one-episode "fix it" towards the end of the season, rather than an emotionally fulfilling arc. There's a big difference between actually taking Ruby through this journey of coming to terms with her grief and (fingers crossed) her mistakes vs. introducing us to the fact that She Is Sad and then giving us a scene later in the Volume when she inexplicably, completely Overcomes It. Think Oscar accepting his role as Ozpin's host off screen. Qrow suddenly deciding he's done with drink and look, there are no problems with quitting. Or Ruby's lie never amounting to anything, Ren deciding he's just a bad teammate somewhere out in the snow, even leaving half our characters for a Volume with a potential time-skip on the horizon.
RWBY is very good at saying, "Here's a big problem" and also "It's fixed now," but it's grown terrible at providing the in between; how we got from the staggeringly difficult problem to its resolution. I'm really hoping Ruby's arc doesn't go the same route.
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number 7: here is greenwood
GREENWOOD!!!!!!!!! WOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! okay i'm cool. "here is greenwood" is a shoujo manga serialized in hana to yume from 1986 to 1991 written and drawn by nasu yukie. in 1991 until 1993 it got adapted into a 6 episode ova and this is kinda where it ends i feel. i wouldn't say it has had any kind of major impact in the medium, the genre or any major group of individuals, but god i do think it did stir something inside me.
i either tend to gravitate towards stuff that isn't particularly popular, because i'm trying to come off as cooler than i am or simply because it just happens naturally. couldn't tell you, but finding that one little thing you end up enjoying so much without anyone else seemingly caring about it is always fun regardless of your personality. turns out it's a lot easier to become the biggest fan of a thing no one has seen, you know. a bit like becoming the world record holder of a game no one has cared to speedrun, it's just funny.
picking out what consists of "my favorite shows of all time" isn't so easy once you've been watching media more seriously after a while, those starting years will definitely shape you up and become a major part of the main stuff you like. even if you fully know it's bad, you hold it close to yourself because it was there at the start, and it's always nice to think back on that. so, it often happens with me where i certainly enjoy something enough to think of it as "this could be a favorite, but does it deserve the spot?". not even sure right now if greenwood deserves it, but i don't know if it matters that much. i decided to make a list of "favorites that aren't favorites" because of greenwood and even if it doesn't stay there and goes up into the list, it sure means something.
ironically, i don't quite think this show came out as a surprise to me as i'd been hyping myself up before even getting into it. it did, though, take turns i wouldn't have seen coming and i'm glad for that. these days i honestly tend to watch anime based on the soundtrack and it's no different here. the soundtrack showed up in online platforms on september of last year, which is around where i found out about it since i already follow nagata shigeru (even if i haven't even seen ocean waves, he just makes good tracks). my first mention of it over discord was me getting mad at my bank while i was dealing with my phone insurance after i tried reading one piece and got my phone stolen 13 pages into the first chapter, but that's a story for another day. i just said "this is the soundtrack of me killing a man" with a link to shun's theme , which is honestly accurate for any man killing activities. in context however, there's a bit more to the story.
this is why, to anyone caring to read, i want to do the longest and probably only essay / analysis / backtrack / retrospective / whatever the hell for "here is greenwood" you will find online. i HAVE to be that guy. otherwise, what have i been obsessing over this thing for around a month? the show has 6 episodes while the manga has 11 volumes (although viz squished it into 9 which is better), so i'll be basing myself on the pacing of the anime in relation to the manga, back and forth between them so the chapters match up. the manga does, however, have more stuff to it throughout half of its runtime so it's gonna be a lot of that i suppose. although, and i'll get into it later, the anime seemingly ends up being the more enjoyable version of the two. otherwise, skip to the tldr in bold letters to avoid reading the long ramblings of a crazy man skimming through a show and manga you probably haven't seen and read.
we begin with the hero of our story. he doesn't really have anything that would actually make him a hero, he's just a teenage boy just starting his first year of highschool at ryokuto academy. his name is hasukawa kazuya and i don't blame people for making him the least popular of the 4 central characters on myanimelist, but he's still technically the main character. our dear boy kazuya is moving into the ryokuto dorms, because it turns out he's kinda the unluckiest guy you'll ever meet. his older brother just married the girl he had a crush on, and since they don't have any parents left, they're all living under the same roof, something he simply can't stand anymore. he took the entrance exam for this prestigious boys only school and managed to get in, but in the process he: almost got ran over by a car while he was visiting the school, barely managed to take the entrance exam since the trains were stopped by a blizzard, had his acceptance letter delayed in the mail, and got an ulcer the day of the entrance ceremony that forced him to stay hospitalized for a month. even if god is against him, he persevered, and finally got in.
kazuya is hot headed (almost literally since he's prone to getting nosebleeds), overly serious yet still a bit of a goofus. he's not particularly smart, but he proves himself with the sheer effort he can put into the things he wants to achieve. he often feels like he needs to be stronger and grow on his own, failing to rely on others, as he doesn't really like getting pampered either.
he is introduced to the dorm head, ikeda mitsuru, and the president of the student council, tezuka shinobu. the two most popular, best looking, and important members of the dorms, currently on their second year of highschool. these two are the ones that will introduce him to "greenwood", as they call the dorms, since the full name is kind of a mouthful.
inside room 210 rests his roommate, which he's quickly informed is, in fact, a girl. according to them, kisaragi shun was born a girl, it's just that her birth certificate and every record lists her gender as male. by this point, 8 minutes into the first episode i'm already clocking out. i understand we're talking about japan here and it's the 1980s (rest assured, this becomes more evident as it goes on), but i have the sneaking suspicion that gender identity can't be this series' forte. from my understanding, hibari-kun does tackle these topics in a proper manner and it was also a manga from the 80s, so perhaps it's not completely unheard of. besides, shoujo manga isn't known to be scared of tackling stuff the rest would never dare, but still. me, the audience, and the guy on screen, kazuya, are being informed that he absolutely must keep this fact a secret from the all the boys at the school. if he does not, there will be consequences. added to the fact this guy is seemingly pissed off at his brother for not being "manly enough" since he "works as a nurse" at this school (and also the fact he got married to the woman he liked, even if she's at least a decade older than him), we're not looking too hot. whatever, i'll give it the benefit of the doubt.
3 days go by for kazuya living with a girl in his room, often going outside to let her change, being uncomfortable at night and trying to ignore people's comments of his situation. he finds out, however, that it was nothing more than a farce. shun isn't a girl, he's just a cute guy with long hair. this dude got tricked into thinking otherwise only so everyone in the dorms could bet on how long it would take him to figure out. "damn! i lost... if only it took one more day..." you hear a guy in the background. greenwood, refers to "a nest for bandits and villains" which is all this place is. as much of a prestigious school as this may be, it doesn't speak for the people actually attending it.
there's the guy that sleeps with his motorcycle, the club used to devote their time to a made up religion, or the duo that rent out their room as an arcade. the main trio that will share their time with kazuya stand out as much as anyone else, if not more, so we should get into them.
shinobu (on the right) is the son of a prestigious family. he's calm and collected, devious and cunning. not a lot seems to change his expression, as he's swift and decisive yet his has his mischievous side as he often enjoys messing with people, and specially his roommate. mitsuru (left), is the handsome, aloof guy that simply loves giving kazuya as hard of a time as he can.
shun, aka the most popular character in the show, is a confident, assertive and strong willed young man. it just so happens he kinda looks like a girl. it is very often played for jokes, but not once does he mind it and finds enjoyment in it himself. he is, in fact, "a guy with a gender", as you could say. he leaves his hair long because he likes it, he dresses up however he feels like and often more feminine because he finds it fun, and he just knows who he is and what he wants to be, which is highly respectable. i was mentioning earlier about his theme and it's honestly pretty fitting for the guy, there's something magical and cheery about it that really sticks out, while having a tone of that seemingly feminine side.
these four are the rag tag greenwood team, getting into trouble, helping others and messing with each other. guys that maybe wouldn't usually be friends with each other, but it's always the time and place that will bring people together.
most of volume 1 isn't too dissimilar from episode 1, they change around the order of some scenes for it to make more sense and remove or add dialogue for it to flow better, but most of the main events stay intact. kazuya's main goal is to stay far from his home to avoid thinking about sumire, the woman he loves and his now sister in law. this is what he's in greenwood for. it's not as simple as "running away" from it and his feelings, but trying to come to terms with it, get distracted, and find himself. the main overarching theme of this series is moving past a love that was not meant to be. whether it's by moving away, making new friends or finding new love, the goal is the same. ironically, the people around him don't really allow him to move past so easily, since his brother is still around all the time, his friends kinda make fun of him for it (because it is funny) and sumire herself is so oblivious to it that it keeps stabbing him in the heart which, yeah, i get it.
vimeo
not sure if you, dear reader, has had the experience of being in a dorm with other people, or going through a moment of unrequited love, but it doesn't get any realer than this! for one, living with people close to you for a while is just a nice experience. always having people to rely on, to hang out with, to talk to, at any given moment. almost to the point you may start depending on it. as a matter of fact, the room i shared with other people for a bit was 211, the same one mitsuru and shinobu are in! for the other, trying to move past something like that isn't the easiest. in fact, it may just be the aftermath that's the hardest and that takes the longest, that is, finding the same feeling somewhere else. filling that spot with something new, or someone new. cannot really blame a guy for trying so hard to change his life around.
kazuya decides to stay in the dorms for summer vacation, as he insists he does not want to set foot home, and sumire decides to pay him a visit. not only her but his brother kazuhiro also plays fun with him at times simply because he likes to see his reaction. he's kind of a goat, but he does genuinely care for his brother. later he's informed he can't stay in the dorms for winter holidays, which is what forces him to go back home for once.
half of the first volume doesn't get adapted probably to improve the pacing, although the extra chapters also don't feel too substantial to the story overall. in one of them the lights go off at the dorms and a couple of girls get in, which they initially think are ghosts, only to turn out they're not. it's not that exciting of a chapter and the show does a better version of this a bit later on. besides, i believe that not showing as many female characters in the ovas works better for the series, as opposed to the manga which starts doing it more often from here.
after kazuya goes back home for the first time in a while, the boys meet up out in the city. here, they find a strange looking girl being tailed by men in suits. it only turns out this girl is "nitta mieko", an idol that simply wanted to get some free time for herself while her agency wouldn't let her. uh, she becomes a bit of a prominent character throughout the manga, while she doesn't really appear at all in the anime. to the actual plot itself, she doesn't do a whole lot, she just comes and goes from time to time. not much against her, it only feels like she's just there.
for another chapter, they're already on valentine's day, meaning they will get chocolate. shun mentions he's straight and he had a girlfriend already which the rest find strange, i suppose. both mitsuru and shinobu get all the girls from other schools to wait outside and throw chocolates at them, to which they run away from. kazuya has one girl that's a bit obsessed with him, yet he doesn't remember her name nor who she is. she mistakes shun for a girl, so she gives up on him quick, though. i'm a bit iffy with this chapter because even if it is supposed to be a well known fact that mitsuru is constantly getting girls to ask him out (and he's generally also unlucky with said girls) the anime doesn't actually show much of that, unlike the manga. i don't think this is bad though, it's more of a thing they just say but never really show as you're kind of invited to fill in the blanks for yourself. since it is only 6 episodes they obviously skip around a lot of parts of the year, and i don't think it's quite necessary to see everything they do, as getting a glimpse around their life is all you need to understand how they're doing and what a random day in greenwood can be like. the manga almost incessantly needs to show both mitsuru and shinobu as the popular guys and since we're talking about an all boys school, even if they are popular, it doesn't feel like it's something that should happen so often and at such a big scale, in my opinion.
kazuya also simply not knowing who the girl that has a crush on him seems off and a bit too early. i suppose his mind is still focused on sumire, sure. so, he's probably not ready to move on that quick? even then, the situation kind of presents itself in front of him and he simply fumbles it for no major reason, he simply does not know the girl from his previous school.
the final chapter sets up the next volume, where mitsuru gets abducted by none other than shinobu's big sister. the anime does a funny thing here on episode 2 where they kinda tell you "go read the chapter for context" but it doesn't really matter. the episode centers around shinobu's sister, nagisa, kidnapping shun's little brother, reina, who obviously looks like a little girl because feminine looking boys is a staple of the kisaragi household. this is, in turn, a direct sequel to the manga chapter.
nagisa hates her brother because he's kinda just better than her really. she's stuck up, pretentious, demanding and selfish. since they were little she always wanted to be seen as the superior one, and because shinobu doesn't give a damn about anything, he never really cared about whatever she tried doing to him. part of their father's favoritism towards shinobu must certainly come from the fact she's a woman, i will not deny that, and she has the right to be mad. she's still an awful person though and only wants her to be the one to inherit the family business. so, to "take revenge" on him, she decides to kidnap his friend. genius!
part of the volume is dedicated to them finding out it's her and then going to save him. in the process mitsuru tries to escape and makes fun of her. he ends up with only his underwear on to, uh, make it worse for him? i guess? in the process of escaping mitsuru gets his face cut which was supposed to be something they planned on doing to ruin how pretty he was or something, but apparently mitsuru has superpowers so the skin on his face simply fixes itself instantly. now, greenwood isn't scared of the supernatural, weird things will happen. but having his face regenerate is a bit too much in my opinion. i think it would be a really solid joke for him to "suddenly be fine the next page" instead of it actually and legitimately being superhuman. would play on the meta and sell the ridiculousness of it even more. which seems even weirder considering nasu loves to play with meta jokes. she will often draw herself commenting on facts or details that don't really make sense so she can address them herself, or have the characters directly refer to her or the manga as a whole. in this same chapter in fact, she mentions how it doesn't make sense that they're still in their first and second year of highschool if holidays are already over. i think some of these jokes are fine, but nasu loves doing it a little bit too much for my taste.
anyway, what the anime does instead, as i mentioned, is have shun's little brother be the victim. nagisa decided that she won't deal with boys anymore and only cares about girls now, so he picks up reina instead (unbeknownst to her that he's actually a boy). i think this take on it is better, since shinobu ends up knowing what the deal is way faster and manages to figure out a plan for the rest of the boys to follow. reina does, too, mess with her and her agents by asking for food and to take a shower, which gets weirder than it should! these guys kinda get really flustered about the supposed little girl they've kidnapped which is extremely weird (one of them even trying to peep while he's taking a shower!). nagisa is also really weird about it at the start but we know for a fact she's a terrible person so whatever. it tries to follow with the joke that people often mistake the kisaragi boys for girls, but it could've been something else, you know. specially when it's grown ass adults we're talking about, but whatever, it's still a fun episode. all of this ends with shinobu giving his sister a final warning, effectively pointing a gun at her and saying he was gonna take care of her this time for sure. only to turn out it's a toy gun. a little detail that stands out at the end of this episode, in a strange way, is mitsuru making fun of kazuya for developing a crush on igarashi miya, a girl from an all girls highschool that will become relevant later. it's a bit funny because by this point they have never shown the two of them interacting, and the first time that he will see her is later on in the anime. however i think it's mostly working as a little nod of foreshadowing, as the events in the ovas don't really seem to be in chronological order.
what is honestly surprising is the chapter that follows this, still on volume 2. a side story about two guys from the dorms in room 117 ending up as a couple and finding out they're gay. i'd honestly recommend just reading this chapter, as it's surprisingly good and i'm almost left wishing they had adapted it. they sure do the "but it can't be, he's a guy!" / "there's no way i'm a homosexual!" and sure, one of the two guys also does look like a girl, but it's cute and well handled in my opinion. throughout both the show and manga kazuya stays as the guy that like, simply doesn't know gay people exist, i think. he's not inherently homophobic, i'd say. he's always genuinely shocked as if he doesn't know what just happened, almost to the point it's funny. it simply does not process in his mind and he resets.
next chapter is about girls from another school taking pictures of mitsuru with his shirt off because it's too hot? and shinobu has diarrhea. the one after that, the boys go to the pool. everyone there thinks shun is a girl (as usual) so they ask him to go into the women's dressing room, and the lifeguard gets disappointed to find out he's a guy, but their outfits are sick so it's fine.
we continue to see kazuya being the one taking care of dorm head duty since mitsuru is away for the week. reina rolls up to the dorm and he's actually way more of an annoying brat than in the anime. kazuya lowkey bullies the kid and thinks shun should be rougher with him, or something. he still kinda has that thing of being disappointed that his brother isn't tough for whatever reason.
volume 3 starts school sports festival, not a thing we see in the anime. shun is dressed up as a cheerleader, kazuya is the fastest runner alive, shinobu set up bets for each team. typical stuff. later we see a girl show up at the school because her girlfriend was going there to see someone else. every single one of the boys absolutely loses their mind at the sight of a "real lesbian" who they thought was nothing more than a myth, and then it just turns out the her girlfriend saw mitsuru dressed up as a woman as part of the festival event (which they never even showed) and she was interested. rest of the volume is mieko showing up again asking for a favor because someone is trying to assassinate her, the boys celebrating new year's, a kid trying to figure out if shinobu is evil to get into the journalism club, and the motorcycle guy getting a real girlfriend.
a thing the manga definitely does better over the anime is showing the rest of the people in the dorms. although i barely even up remembering their names, they sure are there and have their own things going on. they do become more prevalent and they're part of greenwood as a whole. i just don't particularly feel like they stand out as characters themselves? some of their stories are fine and all but they serve as a bunch of background dudes that chip in at stuff most of the time. while it is cool to see the dorms more lived in, they're also not so important that it makes them feel like they actually matter, if it make sense.
as the manga goes on it starts feeling like a bit of a bottleneck. by no means is it not entertaining, it's simply that it jumps around between stuff that doesn't feel like it amounts to a lot. probably the reason why as i continue explaining things here i go over these chapters with stuff to say about them. next is volume 4 though! so almost halfway through!
this volume shows us the woman that shinobu's older brother (because it seems he has one) was supposed to marry. i believe, she doesn't really amount to much in the story, so i won't even go into detail about her. they go into a flashback with how shinobu and mitsuru met in their first year and fought, to then end up respecting each other. it's cool.
the rest of the volume is half a dragon quest parody and the other half a ghost story. both of these do, in fact, appear in the anime. however, they do so in a different way. in the manga, the fantasy manga parody is really just that, a sort of spin off that goes for a couple chapters. in the ova, the boys at the dorms plan on filming a movie to show at the festival, which is honestly such a cooler idea. they show them going around planning and filming stuff. shinobu and mitsuru even have to go pose for the self insert manga author that uses them as reference for her next manga so they can get the outfits they need. it's a whole process of them showing how they're doing this indie movie at their own school while cutting into the actual scenes of the supposed movie, real neat stuff.
in the other chapters, they go to a hotel shun's family just acquired and stay for the night. it just so turns out it's haunted and a bunch of girls try to get the boys to become ghosts as well so they can be together. mitsuru, however, manages to exorcise them since his family runs a shrine and he simply knows how to do that (?). ironically, he's the one that needs to get an exorcism in the ova.
this episode is one of my favorites by far. the lights go dark in greenwood, just like they did in volume 1 long ago. this time, mitsuru gets haunted by a girl he doesn't know. what's funny about this is that she is just a normal, cute girl and nothing else. she hangs around, talks to them, plays games, etc. fully visible to everyone, you simply can't touch her. mitsuru gets into trouble for bringing a girl into the dorms since he's clearly not allowed to, but it's not like he can do anything about it. he gets really stressed out and consistently asks her to leave him alone (which, wow. rude). i'm almost definitely biased here but this girl is actually voiced by the same woman that does my favorite character in the trails series, so, yeah. she's just really cute and fun and doesn't really hinder his daily activities in the slightest so seeing him get really pissed off about it is entertaining. the way the episode starts is also my current favorite thing ever:
this episode perfectly encapsulates the charm that has me tied to greenwood. the music, the characters, the wacky situations that get oddly real for short spans. by the end of the episode, she reveals that there isn't any major reason for her to be haunting mitsuru besides the fact that he's good looking. she simply hadn't ever kissed anyone before dying, and she wanted to do that. he strictly refuses because he's a little baby bitch and she leaves. instead, a day later, she tricks him by picking up the cat and having him kiss it. except that she's actually not done with him because she still likes him, so she brings a bunch of other ghost girls to mess with them. really funny. again, ironic, how he's the one getting haunted this time and he can't do anything about it.
the two final episodes of the anime are the most relevant arc of the series, which won't happen until much later in the manga. so we keep moving.
volume 5 takes place around the school festival, the one they made a movie for in the ova. kazuya gets tricked into a game of ping pong to see who would get the main role for the play they're doing, while shun does also take part of a different play. basically, we get 3 of the 4 main guys to dress up as women. shun's play is lupin's castle of cagliostro, which did also happen in the anime as an extra special segment at the end of that episode and it's really neat.
the rest of the volume has a new guy show up claiming that kazuhiro isn't worthy enough to be married to sumire. this guy is just her cousin, which is also in love with her, so let's leave it there. at the end they show a flashback into how the two of them met back in college, to then get introduced into the hasukawa household. this flashback is neat overall, it gives further information on how they've been doing as a family of two brothers, and a bit of insight into both kazuhiro and sumire's relationship.
sumire has been with them since kazuya was around 14, while she was in her early 20s, which i suppose isn't too terrible for him to fall in love? it obviously wouldn't work out regardless of the circumstance, but this isn't something they actually ever try to push for or imply it could've happened. not a lot more than teenage love, you know. what is actually fun is getting the news that sumire is pregnant with a boy. it doesn't really shape the story at all, but in the large scheme of things it does try to show the shift between their relationship and kazuya's feelings, which is great to see.
volume 6 has one chapter of shinobu meeting an alien that tells him he has a specimen that looks exactly like him who recently escaped containment. shinobu shoots him and doesn't flinch at the idea of killing someone that looks exactly like him, maybe because he's more of a robot than whatever this alien made could be, but we're still stretching the logic of this manga the more we go.
following chapter is the boys playing baseball against a friend of mitsuru's, fun chapter. the dorms move on to the next year, and they do actually start their second and third year of highschool. kazuya is the one becoming the dorm head this time, either because mitsuru likes to mess with him and / or because he does genuinely respect the guy. kazuya isn't too sure himself, though. some new students show up like the kid from singapore who they keep trying to explain things to as if he's some sort of otherworldly being, and he also shows signs of being completely clueless on how stuff works like not even knowing what a school trip is. i asked someone i know if this is true and they said that people in singapore do know what a school trip is (as i assumed), but sure. the school trip does happen, where they meet mieko once again and she asks mitsuru to do some modelling for a tv ad. this becomes a whole thing with mitsuru not being sure whether or not he wants to do it because like, his brother will think that he's only doing it to attract the attention of his "real parents" because actually he feels that he's not really part of his family since he's adopted? it's weird, the adoptive part will come into place later (although it's not that big either).
in volume 7 kazuya's nephew is born and they need to take care of him because sumire was gonna give them a couple of tickets for the ice ring. in the ice ring, two girls try to trick shinobu and mitsuru into becoming their partners because they need a couple to do competitive ice skating, or something. the conclusion is shinobu saying "why doesn't one of you get a sex change?" and they think it's genius and leave it at that. hooray for surgery. there's another three side stories with an edo era spin off, the boys going into the kisaragi onsen, and the duo in the arcade room getting cursed by an evil videogame you have to beat in one go.
it doesn't end with, but midway through we got the start of the main final arc, the one with igarashi miya. miya is a girl mitsuru used to know back on his previous school, she seems to be a bit of a delinquent that got into trouble with some girls over turf conflicts. she needs a place to stay for the night and tries to get help at greenwood. kazuya insists in helping her and offering his room even if it's strictly forbidden, because he sees something in her eyes. there's a certain sadness and uncertainty he's not sure about, so he wants to know more.
she explains to kazuya about her situation, and it turns out, she's not as tough as she seems. she doesn't like that people see her as a delinquent, she's not strong, she's a bit of a scaredy cat and is always trying to keep herself from crying. in the process of helping her and getting the girls from the other school to stop annoying her, kazuya realizes that, whoops! he kind of likes her! unfortunate for him, she already has a boyfriend. she does really insist that he's a good guy since he's always been there for him. on the other hand, kazuya wonders why was it because of him that she turned into a delinquent, or why doesn't she ever feel loved by him. she feels that he doesn't like her for who she is but rather he believes he likes her because they've always been together. not a lot he can do about it though, as he doesn't really have an excuse to see her again.
the anime doesn't change much here, the episode starts with kazuya already dwelling about her as they usually do with these episodes, starting with the aftermath of the events and recapping on what happened to them. i do like this, i'll say.
volume 8 is the last one before overlapping with the final episode, so it's mostly filled with extra chapters. there's one about a boy not going to class because he hates one of the teachers, another one with mitsuru getting tailed by a girl (again) who loves the made up version of mitsuru she imagined while seeing his commercial, devilwood again with the dragon quest fantasy manga parody, and the sports festival once more. the thing i like about the sequel to the sports festival is how kazuya gets into the track team to distract himself from thinking about miya, which seems to work for a bit. not essential, but realistic.
another one of the chapters is him falling off a ladder and landing in an alternate dimension where everyone is female, which is actually kinda fun, if not a little bit short. they call it "cherrywood" instead of greenwood, and there's actually a version of this they had the voice actors record as part of the drama cds. there are a couple of these mainly for the special chapters like the sports festival and stuff, they're neat. once kazuya comes back to his world the boys in the dorm keep dropping themselves off the ladder to see if they can go there as well so it's pretty funny.
i think the girl that was obsessed with mitsuru is somewhat a different version of the ghost girl from episode 4, although this one gets so mad at so many things he does that he legitimately cannot go around doing anything without having this girl break into tears, so it's funny i'll let it slide. i insist that having mitsuru be overwhelmed by girls all the time doesn't give the vibe of the "all boys dormitory life" that most of the series tries to push forward, but only some of them wouldn't hurt too much, i suppose.
we arrive to the final volume, as well as the last episode. had you been reading and watching these alongside, you would have a decent grasp of all the activities these people have gotten involved with. the thing is that, the 6 ova episodes released some time after the manga was already finished, meaning that it's not like anyone actually expected you to go back and forth between each other. it would be impractical to do so anyway without knowing what actually gets adapted and not. i've seen people mention that the way these episodes are formatted makes it so only a fan of the original manga would be able to enjoy it, with how much time is skipped between each one. i can't really agree with this point, as it is very much structured in the normal episodic anime way, only with some details here and there that probably don't end up being super clear since they weren't addressed but don't actually hinder the overarching narrative or actual character interactions. after all, these dynamics work well enough on their own to be used in whatever situation they get in. it's not that the manga does not do this, but it often feels like they're there to fill time rather than to simply entertain. more often than not, the chapters feel disorganized, same-y and as if they don't have any major purpose to be there than simply "what if x thing happened". it happens, and it's over. probably not inherently a bad thing, i guess it's a matter of presentation after all. ironically, the manga may just feel like more targeted towards fans than the adaptation, as it really takes a long while for these relationships to grow and develop. if i get too many details, it'll get stale and won't feel like i'm really learning much until something major happens. if i just get the core elements, i can build the gaps myself. less can definitely be more. dudes will be dudes, after all.
in that regard, the episode starts with kazuya helping out at mitsuru's house. the place used to be a bigger temple, but over time the land was reduced and the place isn't what it used to be. not a big deal for them though, as they still maintain the place. it's a nice family of 4. mother, father and siblings. sho, mitsuru's younger brother is only a few weeks younger than him, as by the time they found mitsuru outside their house, it had already been a little bit since he was born.
adoption is usually treated as a careful subject matter, but i don't really think it should be. throughout the manga, mitsuru has his moments of doubting himself, his past, where he comes from and his family. he cares about them and they care about him, specially his brother, but there's always a weird air to it. since he is the older son, he would be the one to take over the shrine, which he's not really sure if he wants to do himself. his mother makes sure to tell him that he doesn't need to worry about it, he should just do whatever he wants to do. his brother misses him, but he needs to focus on himself too. sho seems to be angry at him because mitsuru mentions how he is trying to go live on his own as soon as he can. this is where we get a little bit iffy.
from what i am able to gather, mitsuru feels indebted to his family. they aren't blood related, so sure, he loves them but he knows that they had no right to take him in and they did anyway. it's not that they actually show any sign of it being a pain on them or anything, he is just a son to them. i suppose he feels bad for taking his brother's spot for the shrine, but he doesn't even need to take the place if he doesn't want to. so, in the end, "wanting to leave home as soon as possible" is kinda just a normal thing i believe. i mean sure, deep down it's probably because he doesn't want to be more of a burden, and even if he's not he still wants to make their life easier. this is fine. he makes it such a bigger deal than it should ever be, though. his brother gets pissed at him and his response is "i'm not trying to be an outsider, i am an outsider" my guy what are you saying. kazuya goes as far as to ask him if he ever thinks of his blood related parents and he says no, so what is even his deal? mitsuru wonders to himself if you can still be family even if you aren't blood related, kazuya says that it's love that matters. unfortunately this is literally where this ends and it will never be brought up again or be concluded, because miya appears in front of them. it's unfortunate that it doesn't really get any closure, i feel exploring the meaning of family, specially with kazuya's situation being a thing, could be a really cool addition to the series. nevertheless, it doesn't happen. mitsuru just says that, he feels like he has to leave home as soon as he can, his brother doesn't like this mentality, and that is it. not even the manga chooses to explore this further, that's all there is.
they bump miya and his boyfriend tenma on their way back to the dorms, kazuya still sees that expression in her face, as if she's about to cry but she's holding back. now before getting ahead of ourselves this guy isn't abusing her or anything, he is kind of just a dude. not the best dude, but a dude nonetheless. miya has been wanting to say thanks to kazuya for a while, but she never gathered the courage to go visit him and say thanks. she would go nearby the school and then run away, never sure herself of why she was doing that. this time with the opportunity right in front of her, the only thing she manages to say is "i'm sorry". inevitably, this almost kills kazuya and gets him sick for a couple of days.
"sorry" doesn't really cut it. sorry for what? she didn't do anything. kazuya decides to give her a call after his brother convinced him to. his counseling is essentially: "you shouldn't care about the other guy, focus on yourself", which is fair enough i suppose, but i think a situation like this is very much gonna depend on who you're talking about. kazuya doesn't want to ask a girl with a boyfriend out, no one wants to be the guy that steals someone else's girlfriend really. but you know, there's something going on here too, as she doesn't seem particularly happy with him either. i think this brother bonding is a good moment for the two of them, although not the most particularly touching. kazuhiro is a fun guy, he is confident and he would do anything he needs to get the girl he loves (he did, after all, get the girl his own brother loved). it does come off as a little weird piece of advice from his part, but it works in context so that's all he needs to call her. she does, however, say sorry again and hang up instantly.
"i heard hasukawa got rejected by that delinquent girl", no! he hasn't even said anything to her! so the guy decides to wait outside her school to see her. he stays for a week until he finds out she was hospitalized, they find where she's staying and she's already gone. he sends her a letter but tenma grabs it before she can read it. luck is never on his side. persistence, however, never fails. a little bit of a bizarre thing here, tenma explains how "you need a special permission from their parents to date the girls from this school" which i don't - know, if it's a real thing or not in some japanese schools and honestly i don't even feel like looking it up right now. they both leave and run away from kazuya, leaving him alone.
then, on their way home:
vimeo
which is an excellent moment, although my favorite part of this is how loud the trains are it's so funny to me i can't even begin to explain. tenma is a bit of a self centered prick, he mostly shows off his nice side but he's the guy that wants things to go his way all the time, you know. he didn't particularly do anything wrong, he's just a bit of a toxic influence on miya. he's the reason she became a delinquent so maybe he would care about her more (or get scared and dump her), he's the reason why she doesn't feel loved or particularly pretty, he's the reason why she's so sheltered. having a guy like him that won't let you do the things you want, always holding your hand and trying to keep you "safe" isn't part of a healthy relationship. kazuya is the one that incites her into being herself, opening up, finding her strength and dealing with her weakness. "i'm with you", is what he replies to her once she tells him how he feels. it's about finding that person that will be there for you, the one that will always be around and, most of all, love you unconditionally.
the rest of the manga has a little bit of the aftermath and how the people at greenwood are doing. it, once more, doesn't stand out from the crowd. they're not bad chapters, they're fun. the story is already over, though. the final chapter is actually nasu drawing a bunch of reader requests she never got to do and kazuya inviting some of his friends over to show them around greenwood and work on a project (friends we have never ever seen nor have been mentioned before now, but whatever). here is greenwood in all its glory.
if you didn't care to read all of that, great. this is the tldr; greenwood is about finding that next opportunity. mainly in love, but in most things in life. the anime adaptation takes things in some fresher directions, streamlining the experience and focusing on what is important. in the span of 6 episodes we get to know these guys, what their deal is and how their relationship works and shapes who they are. some more than others, but meeting new people you care about and will be there for you when you need it (for better or for worse) is what makes us human, and what inevitably helps us grow as people. grow out of pains, grow into understanding others and what makes us who we are.
there's something special about the serenity behind it all that i can't quite put into words, hence why i didn't go into much detail. the backgrounds are often soft and share a clean palette with a watercolor texture to it that makes it feel like a never ending dream. compared to the manga in this case, nasu's art is nice and specially with the covers and colored pieces, but it does take a while for characters to particularly pop or look like themselves as they often suffer from the same face syndrome shoujo manga can be known for. color goes a long way into helping battle this. the manga does also often rely on jokes that maybe aren't as funny in the current age, so there's that too.
the music helps sell the impact of it all, with the magical orchestra that follows around the almost play like scenarios that overcome greenwood on a daily basis. as the subtitle reads "under the tree of memories", like looking back on the moments that mattered the most and shaped the future. the theme of greenwood echoing behind this feeling. some of the other songs they made for the show sell the fun of it all as well i'd strike a comparison with ocean waves considering it's the same director and the same guy doing the music, but i haven't actually seen that so there isn't anything i can mention.
in retrospect, 6 episodes isn't really a whole lot. there's 3 of them that center around some plot and then the other 3 are extra content that focus on whatever the hell they felt like. it's obviously not something for everyone, i'm not gonna come out and say this is a must watch or anything like that, only how i feel about things. stuff doesn't need to be deep, it can just be for self fulfillment. it's often the mindless things that get the most enjoyment out of me, being there to have a good time before anything else. exactly what they do here at any moment, picking out a day at random and making the most out of it. a day where any one of these bandits will get into trouble and they'll come out of it with a smile.
i could wish it was a bit longer. maybe add some of the chapters with the other boys at the dorms, add the part with kazuya's nephew and then him entering the track team and idk, maybe the one with mitsuru and his commercial to actually give an ending to his whole adoptive family thing. alas, this is what we get, and i will not complain.
had it been at a different point in my life i watched this, i probably wouldn't care as much. it speaks to a part of me i hadn't learned about years ago, and would probably only look back on fondly into the future. those things that happen and make you rethink stuff for a good while and, in turn, open your horizons. so, feeling identified with media and connecting with stuff is a bit of what we do this for, i think.
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Hello I’m the anon who asked about the chapter titles:D and honestly I would love for you to explain the thought behind them cuz they’re so cool too me lol
of course of course ! buckle up because this is going to be long shhsjdn
If the window is over your heart, and it is painted shut, then we are breathing river water
surface level, it’s imagery of the windows he’s sneaking out of, on a deeper level, the fact that it is in reference to the heart and painted shut specifically means that the heart isn’t open/there isn’t emotional vulnerability yet, after all, this is only chapter one. the breathing river water goes hand in hand with this, the current situation is suffocating/drowning, open the damn window LMAO
We know how the light works, we know where the sound is coming from. Verse. Chorus. Verse.
we know how the light works, we know where the sound is coming from = they know that the other exists, they know how acting normally in social situations works (they choose to be weird.) the sound specifically is also in reference to the fact that he could hear the reader under his window again. verse chorus verse = we are supposed to act in routine, this interaction is going to break that. it’s also their back and forth of meeting each other on accident
You said “Don’t be silly,” so I followed you into the store
This one is quite literal. spotting each other on chance and following each other around the bookstore. don’t be silly = the reluctance and the desire to stop acting weird and stop meeting on accident (they very much fail that)
And you play along because it’s funny, because it’s written down
they both decide to “play along” with continuing to know each other and this whole friends with benefits deal because it’s entertaining and why the fuck not sjsjjs. the “because it’s written down” = fourth wall break kinda. because I’m writing it and because I too think it’s funny
Dried leaves on the surface of a pool— You could drown in those eyes, I said
for one his eyes are utterly hypnotic, two the dried leaves = autumnal colors which give his vibes and this is also supposed to happen in autumn. drowning in those eyes = kinda drowning in horniness, getting immersed in the thought of him, the reader is getting up to some spicy shenanigans lost in thought of him yknow yknow 😏
Knocked hard enough to make the record skip and change its music
well for one the “knocked hard” bit is kind of a euphemism in this context, I mean. there is in fact fucking on this man’s desk HSGSGGD,, the making the record skip and the changing of the music is in reference to the reader kinda moving the deal from just a sexual thing to also have that friends aspect, they change the music of the relationship
In the dream I don’t tell anyone, I’m afraid to wake you up
They don’t tell each other about what they think of each other, they don’t want to shake this interaction out of the blissful ignorance, the reader is scared to know if he doesn’t like them and he doesn’t want to tell the reader about his job and ability, they don’t want to ruin the dynamic
Sure, it’s good to feel things, and if it hurts, we’re doing it to ourselves
In terms of feeling things, this is one of the first interactions between them that gets a little bit deeper, and the reader likes that they’ve gotten to know more, the fact that it hurts is their own fault— the reader for overthinking and him for being closed off
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Not gonna lie cataclysm Sam gave me hope for the future of his/Darlin's arc, I was hoping like we would see some of that conniving and deep seated rage and thirst for vengeance come up even a little just to give his character some texture again but then. Well.
I feel like it would have been interesting to have some conflict in their relationship just based on the fact that these are two deeply introverted people unused to having another person be so involved in their life, and also because they're both very damaged people who haven't really dealt with their trauma and have left it festering inside them... (not like the Geordi/Cutie audios where they're like. All extremely conflict heavy and it's a clearly unhealthy relationship) but I feel like Sam and Darlin should have had some growing pains just because like. They went from extremely isolated people to suddenly having this other person in their life all the time, it's a huge adjustment but there has been no acknowledgement of that!
And I feel like they both hold onto a lot of anger, it could have been interesting for them to work through that together and learn healthy ways of dealing with it?
Idk like I feel like there are a lot of interesting dynamics they could have represented but instead :/
(My most far out dream was that sam and darlin would essentially Make Each Other Worse and feed into each other's anger and go off the grid hunting criminals the department hadn't stopped, becoming a vigilante power couple with extremely questionable methods)
i relate to this so much. I feel like redacted often misses opportunities to explore the "growing pains" and pining stages of relationships, even with ones that are supposed to slow burn. Needless to say, they are not slow burn lmfao.
I mean, if you're going to skip ahead to them being in a relationship, at least put some conflict in it??? Doesn't even necessarily have to be between the partners, just give them challenges that they have to face as partners. That's kinda what a relationship is supposed to be! You're life partners, best friends, you're supposed to face life's challenges together as a team!!! its just. Ugh.
I really wish they had actual development as characters in a relationship. I really would have loved a "they make each other worse" dynamic. Come ON!!!! give us something!!! Erik misses so many good opportunities for interesting relationships and stories and dynamics. Like lil bro they are RIGHT THERE!!!
Thank you for the ask!
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I’m starting off with writing and I never know where to begin. Could you help me out? If you’re free of course.
omgomgomg yessssss
but i will start off with saying that it depends on the person and their methods.
(this is a long post so check under the cut)
for me, what i like to do is start off with the main plot of the story. so like answer the five w's. like who for me (for stories on this blog) is usually bucky and y/n, but also 'who's pov is being highlighted?'. 'what' would be 'what's the problem?' or 'what are they dealing with?'. 'where' is usually decided later for me, but i do have an atmosphere chosen such as 'cheery' or 'sadness' (to be completely vague). 'when' is more like 'when does the story come to its climax?' and/or 'when does the problem arise and/or dissolve?'. 'why' is the hardest for me. it's usually just 'why does this happen?' which isn't at much different than 'why?'.
after getting a little summary of the plot to the story, you can start your first draft!
i tend to write out the dialogue that starts to play in my head nowadays. before i used to start with the settings, but found that the dialogue would become choppy and sort of stoic. so now i've started to write out the dialogue before doing anything else. i try not to look back and fix spelling errors or whatever, but it happens sometimes. but try not to do that. also just write the dialogue and don't worry about quotations, but add a little name letter at the end of the sentence so you know who's saying what.
like this:
Hey, you good? b
I've been stabbed. What do you think? y
after that, i add the missing punctuations, character's names and a vague action. this would be the beginning of adding details to your story.
"Hey, you good?" Bucky asked, eyeing you wearily.
"I've been stabbed," you hissed, hand coming up to your wound. "What do you think?"
Again, this is the first draft so don't worry about adding too much or too less. you want to keep it vague, but detailed enough for you to know what's happening.
after that i usually start the second draft that, most of the time, is what i post here. but, to be clear, this is the method i use to post here. so if you're thinking about publishing a book, i would say that you would have at least three drafts before you get your final one. for the second draft, i tend to add all of the sensory details and other little details, written depending on the theme/atmosphere that i've chosen.
kinda like this:
"Hey, you good?" Bucky asked, eyeing you wearily in the dim lighting. Between the deep breaths escaping your mouth, he could hear the tapping of water and humming of electricity coursing through the monitor.
"I've been stabbed," you gritted through your teeth while tucking your knife back into its holster on the back of your thigh. When he caught your hand moving to your stomach and heard the hiss escape your lips before red painted your fingers. "What do you think, genius?"
i did skip over a few things that i'm pretty sure only i do, but that's basically all i do. for the most part, just follow your fingers and mind. let everything flow through and don't bother checking back every five sentences. it's tempting and you might do it a few times. i still do, too. if you keep reading the same thing over and over again, you're gonna find little mistakes and probably hate it just because you've been staring at it for so long. i promise that whatever you write will be completely new and exciting and probably way better than what you think for someone else.
i think that's about it. if you or anyone else have anything else to ask, please do!
#I’ll edit this later#loveys inbox#lovey answers#inbox is always open#ask#thanks for the ask!#lovey talks
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Books Mero read, 2023
Gonna try and do this again, so here are short reviews of the books I read this year!! More gay books, but also some not gay stuff this time, what a surprise!
Red, White and Royal Blue, by Casey McQuiston - This was a rec from a friend and the first actual romance-and-not-fantasy gay book I read, and.... it’s great! I absolutely devoured it, and, sure, its a silly premise. The US’ first son and the prince of england fall in love!! Scandal! I was a bit aprehensive when first getting into it at how... tasteless it might get? But this book was surprisingly self aware, and indulges fully in it’s premise, and in turns tells an actually pretty good love story! The author says in the aknowledgements that this evoked some form of escapism and joy to the readers, given our... current world climates (this book came out in 2021, and... yeah) and I can honestly say that this book was pretty successfull in that. It left me feeling more hopeful, maybe not towards the world in general but to myself at least.
Witchmark by C.L. Polk - Of the edwardian fantasy (or gas lamp fantasy? Im not sure) books I’ve read, this was one of the weaker ones. Interesting enough premise about a veteran doctor in a war hospital trying to both hide his magic, help people and solve a murder with the help of a charming and mysterious fellow. But it kinda.... doesn’t really go anywhere? Sure things happen and mysteries are uncovered, but this book didn’t really have a strong enough... anything, really, to stand on its own. The romance is fine but is mostly just there, and the conclusion didn’t have much oomph either. It’s pretty clearly a lead in to a series, but, given I didn’t see anything special in this one and the other books don’t have mlm protagonists... I think I’ll skip em. I enjoyed this book but not enough to want more.
Widdershins by Jordan L. Hawk - A good enough book about a shy nerd working in a museum, a mystery, and his eventual boyfriend. And the lovecraftian horrors they find, of course. A fun one with sex more graphic than I expected, but still enjoyable. I might pick up the rest of the series at a later date but for now Im sated on this one.
The Perfect Assassin by K. A. Doore - Another just fine one, to be honest. A pretty interesting setting, a town suspended by high beams above a desert, with scheming between its leaders and an assassin class to do their biddings. But thats pretty much the most interesting aspect of the book. The characters are ok, the romance is slight (though the MC is ace, and I really did like that a lot and how he was portrayed, even if it was not that big a deal), and the mystery... good enough but didn’t really keep me guessing or too intrigued. I liked parts of this one, but, again, not enough to pick up the rest of the series given that they star different characters and lack the mlm aspect that appeals so much to me.
Smoke and Shadows by Tanya Huff - I picked this one up almost solely cause I found The Fire’s Stone, which I read last year and is by the same author, so enjoyable. This one felt like one of her more ‘serious’ novels in comparison, not that it has that much more serious tone, but that this one certainly felt more adult. Contemporary fantasy (contemporary here being the 00s) set in a TV studio, very fun characters and very enjoyable plot throughout. It took a little while to get actually really engaging, to be honest, but I still liked it a lot. Might pick up the rest of the series later.
A Restless Truth by Freya Markse - I picked this one up cause I loved the previous book in the series, A Marvelous Light, so much. And honestly, the author has done it again. Loved this book a whooole lot, had loads of fun with it. A murder on a transatlantic ship in the Edwardian era, pretty interesting magic system, veeery fun characters. Sure this one had some graphic (to me) sex scenes, this time between women, but that didn’t take away from anything else here. Can’t wait for the last in the trilogy to come out, was very happy to see it seems to be slated for this year.
A Power Unbound by Freya Markse - Aaaand said last book of the trilogy came out! And I read it! And it’s again, very very good! I do have to say that it’s probably my least favorite of the series though, the plot felt less intriguing in general, which, fair, it’s the last book in a trilogy, there’s less to be revealed. The book also holds the tradition of only the two romantic leads of the moment being POV characters, but there were a couple of moments where it felt that one of the other characters really should be taking the stage. It also has a bit less balance in the plot<->sex scene scenario, compared to the other two... Regardless of these faults, though, it was still a very enjoyable read! Just not as good as the previous books, even if it was a fulfilling end to the trilogy.
Thief of Time by Terry Pratchett - My first discworld book! I’d only read Good Omens from Terry before and... Well now I get why he was a famed author holy shit. I absolutely loved this, and will be reading other discworld books for sure! It’s interesting thinking about how this book reads in comparison to the other books I’ve been reading, or at least most of them. The characters and story being told are important, sure, but this reads like the main purpose of the book is being an enjoyable read, if that makes sense? Its both dense and light, insofar as there’re paragraphs dense with information, but its tonally handled in a very light manner, and lots of that information is there to color in the reading experience. I’m not sure if its cause I haven’t read all that many comedic books (its been years since I read hitchhikers guide, for example) so maybe its a genre thing, but either way. Absoute joy to read.
The Music of What Happens by Bill Konigsberg - Another romance, and this one was waaay too adolescent for me. The main characters are teens, so sure that makes sense and it did fit, but for most of the book I was more cringing at some of the interactions and the way the characters thought than finding it charming. Realistic? Sure in some ways. But not very enjoyable to read. I started skipping some paragraphs starting on the second half but in the end I did enjoy the book. There are some interesting and unexpected things that happenned, and the characters get more serious and less dismissive of stuff by the end, which was nice, but yeah not the best experience overall.
The Witness for the Dead by Katherine Addison - When I saw that the Goblin Emperor had a sequel and said sequel focused on a secondary gay character I was. So happy. And, luckily, with reason! This book is great, I don’t think its as great as the goblin emperor, but still amazing. The world the author’s built is so compelling, so detailed, it’s a delight to dive in again. On the surface, this book looks like a regular-ish murder mystery, but it’s more of a story where a murder mystery happens to feature, having very little to do with the second half and with the resolution coming more at the last possible second, so in that aspect it did leave me wanting, but in all the book was so filling that I honestly didn’t even miss that gratifying mystery resolution much.
The Grief of Stones by Katherine Addison - Direct sequel to the above book, and its much of the same in terms of being very very very good, having some mysteries that are not really the point, and having a great setting. Lots of introspection by the main character this time, which I did enjoy quite a bit. ...Not much more to say other than just as good as the previous one, reccommend just as much.
Lord Mouse by Mason Thomas - I don’t have much to say about this one. It’s... mediocre, but not in the sense that its bad, in the sense that it’s kinda bland? There are good moments here and there, but nothing really gripped me, and the romance fell completely flat, especially for the weird ending that was given to the characters. A fun enough read, if not memorable or special, though you can see that the author put a lot of love and effort in.
Simon Snow trilogy by Rainbow Rowell - I’m very very torn on these books. I absolutely devoured them, reading all three in a little more than a week, and I did really really enjoy them! The first book especially I did adore, and the ‘harry potter spoof’ vibes from it are impecable! But unfortunately that was kinda one of the best things the series had for itself, and after the first two thirds of the first book its mostly dropped. Sure theres a lot of discussion on what comes next for a chosen one, which was really interesting! ...but there’s no proper resolution, and that’s kinda the problem. With the second book especially, everyones a bit too much of a downer, even if I do enjoy the characters a good deal. The lead’s romance in the third book I adored, and there was a lot of stuff there that resonated a lot with me but... I don’t know, there wasn’t a real conclusion, the book just... stopped. Which might be part of the point, tbh, but then theres a half assed epilogue that tells you nothing and for no reason is set a year later and its half a page and it kinda made me mad. Another thing is that the magic system for this universe is great! Its so interesting, has so much potential, BUT as with a lot in these books, it features strongly in the first book then it’s more a set dressing with which nothing is done in the sequels. ...either way, I think these books are worth it, pretty entertaining and fun, even if they kinda start unraveling. Carry On is amazing, Wayward Son is alright and Any way the Wind Blows is a mixed bag, but at least there’s the main romance that, to me at least, kept going strong.
A Wizard of Earthsea by Ursula K. Le Guin - My first Le Guin book! And honestly I can’t quite say ‘I get it now’ like I did with Thief of Time and Terry Pratchett, but at the same time I can? Cause on the surface the writing style, long paragraphs with little dialogue, doesn’t really appeal to me? But it did draw me in by the end, with methodical and.... well constructed storytelling I guess. A lot happens and very little happens at the same time, and its all very broad and decisively told, with characters that aren’t the point but at the same time are... I don’t really know what to say, really. I liked it well enough, it really feels like staring into another world, never knowing everything but just enough to keep interested. Lets see if I like the sequels too I guess.
Tournament of Losers by Megan Derr - In her description at the end of the book, Megan Derr says she’s been accused of fluff and nonsense, and, yeah, that tracks. This book is predictable as can be, not outstanding in any way, but it did make me feel pretty good, and the romance was good enough that once it got going I devoured the rest! I think I liked this more than lots of other ‘just ok’ books I’ve read, so honestly? Here’s to fluff and nonsense.
Board to Death by CJ Connor - It hurts a bit to say it but..... this book’s bad. Not really awful or offensive in any way, but bad and a bit bland, which is really too bad cause there’s definite potential here, and somewhere somehow this could’ve been a pretty good cozy murder mystery book! But alas. I think the worst part, really, is that it’s not that well written. It’s cohesive enough, but there were more than a few times where it got confusing especially when time passed in the story and it didn’t really tell the reader that, which left me questioning what happenned when and when was now, which, for a mystery book, hurt the experience a good bit. It kinda felt like there wasn’t a real editing pass, which um... given the aknowledgements, there was. The mystery itself too was flimsy at best, with the protagonists never really making assumptions, more just getting names of people to question, moving down that list, getting more people to question, and eventually one of those people just straight up tells them who the killer is. The motive for the main character involving himself in the investigation wasn’t convincing either, since the police involve themselves from the get go, with no apparent issues on their part, and the protag didn’t really feel like he needed to get the mystery solved ASAP. But he tells us that he does, for some reason or another. The characters are fine, the plot’s (mostly) ok, and in the end it’s an entertaining enough read (even if I think I finished it more to be able to say I did than for pleasure), though it doesn’t feel like there’s nothing really going for it, which is a shame, since it does feel like a passion project.
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Maybe I'm being premature, but I'm at the Inca arc right now but I kinda suspect that the rot has already started. With the whole Shinra getting possesed by Amaterasu thing it somehow kinda came out and was resolved randomly. Ofocurse I get it - its about resentment of being lied to and feeling like your mission was pointless, despair and rage all that but somehow, I dont know it didnt feel compeling, like a worse Soul in Ukraine getting mad from the black spheres (but that also kinda sucked)
…Oh, wow, I didn’t think of that: Shinra’s possession mirroring Soul’s Black Blood madness. That’s good--that’s a really good observation.
It also reinforces what I didn’t like about Fire Force.
(Spoiler warning for Fire Force, as well as for Jujutsu Kaisen and My Hero Academia.)
If it and Soul Eater were completely different works, I would not mind the structure: if it worked in Soul Eater for a story beat, yes, repeat it in Fire Force, that’s fine, that’s part of Ohkubo’s trademark style, go for it, that’s awesome.
But that’s not what happened. This was a Soul Eater prequel. And at the end of Fire Force, we see the Evangelist reduced to a Kishin-like entity, with the eyes, too, that Shinra kicks away. So, the Evangelist had influence over Amaterasu (the First Pillar), who then had influence over Shinra, who has the same mad smile that the Kishin’s Madness Wavelength produced.
This is no longer Ohkubo’s trademark--this is now creating an origin story for Madness in Soul Eater, and this worldbuilding sucks, I hate it, I don’t like it, can we go back to pretending this wasn’t a prequel so we can stick to previously established canon and whatever headcanon fans came up with to have this make sense?
But that’s my rant: let me get back to your ask.
I get that Amaterasu possessing Shinra seems like it comes out of nowhere.
Maybe that bothers me less because I feel like the manga later explains this clearly enough--even if I’m not a big fan of the results (see the prequel nonsense and origin story for the Kishin’s Madness Wavelength).
But by this point, the negative energy around Amaterasu is getting stronger, even our protagonist Shinra is having a hard time dealing with all of this shit, he has a momentary lapse, it affects him, he falls under the Evangelist’s sway via Amaterasu.
And if this problem hadn’t corrected itself quickly…I don’t know if I would have liked it. Without spoiling too much, look at Jujutsu Kaisen right now. I hate where that manga is right now--because (albeit already being a grim series) it just got so much darker, because the new problem (someone has a lapse, they get possessed, they now do something awful) is making things get so much worse. It is grimdark enough that I don’t feel engaged in still reading. My Hero Academia has that same problem going on: as things just keep getting worse, why should I feel invested, when I can just skip to later in the story when things get better--or when they are going to get worse, making my investment also the more pointless?
So, having Arthur saving Shinra that abruptly? It’s not the most mature storytelling, but it solves the problem with less angst. Maybe the failure to let that angst simmer robs some character depth: this should be a moment to set up that big friendship (romance?) between Arthur and Shinra that gives us the ending--and I don’t feel it, I have never felt like Arthur and Shinra ever got to a point of having anything beyond hostility towards each other, the story never did anything to make me think these two were actually really good friends. This moment with Amaterasu should have solidified that friendship / romance / whatever, and just did not work for me.
You point out that, while you get the moment--Shinra went through a lot of shit, now he gets possessed by Amaterasu--it doesn’t connect emotionally or feel compelling. I think I get that, I think I agree with you. Maybe it would have worked better for me if it felt like Ohkubo was willing to engage with how these moments would screw you up.
It’s why, when it happens again, when later in the story Shinra is possessed by his doppel, and his doppel does awful things with his body, Shinra is surprisingly well-adjusted to getting over this awful trauma. It is too fast, it doesn’t take the trauma seriously enough, it doesn’t show that living after trauma has its challenges--it’s too clean, too shonen, too focused on rushing to an action-packed ending.
Let Shinra cry it out over the shit he has gone through. Instead, it’s just rage without showing greater complexity to those feelings.
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uncharted territory | kth
⤑ series: kinda hot
⤑ pairing: campus flirt!taehyung x sweet girl!reader
⤑ genre: lmao i don’t even know... angst? smut?
⤑ rating: explicit
⤑ word count: 7.5K // unedited.
⤑ warnings: use of alcohol and weed, cursing, dirty talk, slight hair pulling, over-the-shirt nipple play, dry humping, ruined orgasms.
⤑ A/N: hihihi! just here to remind you how much i appreciate all of you guys reading this story nd getting as invested as you are!! don’t hesitate to let me know what’s on your mind - no matter what it is ., feedback is my favorite!!
JANUARY 30TH, 2021 | 19:07
Hoseok is leaning handsomely against the side of his car when you're stepping out. Arms crossed over his chest as his teeth nibble on his lower lip, eyes seeming to sparkle when he's looking at you. The shine only getting brighter when the corners of his mouth lift into a smile. Body lifting from the side of the car to pull the passenger's door open, gesturing to it with his hand.
“Ooh, check out the gentleman,” You're teasing with a laugh, ducking into your seat as he rolls his eyes. Jogging around the front of the car until he's sinking into the spot beside you, taking another moment to let his eyes travel over your body.
Nodding slightly to himself before he's grinning, “You look hot,” His warm hand landing on your thigh to give it a little squeeze before he's pulling from his parking spot and onto the road.
Compliments from Hoseok came sparingly, wasn't really one to gush over your appearance with mere words. He was more of a show-er than a talker in that sense. So when he was paying you a compliment, it was never anything all that deep. Never once compared the brightness of your eyes to the sunlight or whatever Shakespearean shit he could muster up. He was just going with what he thought and you appreciated that.
It kept things from getting confusing between the two of you. If he was constantly dotting on you and telling you how amazing he thought you were (and you were amazing, no doubt about that), but if he was telling you.. it would definitely put a damper on your whole arrangement. You were a simple girl to be completely honest. Words got to you, you'd be head over heels in love if he was calling you beautiful every chance he got.
Hot was good. Hot was fine. Hot was safe. Because catching feelings for Hoseok? You'd be better off standing in the middle of the road waiting to be run over. And then getting the driver to put it in reverse. Hoseok was brutal when it came to girls and relationships, didn't waste time on feelings or the overly emotional.
A bit of an asshole, but that was why you liked him. He knew how to keep things fun and exciting, loved being surrounded by people. But he wouldn't hesitate to tell someone to fuck off if the circumstances called for it. He was cool. To put it simply. A very cool guy taking you out on a date. Anyone would be giddy about that, it was Jung Hoseok for crying out loud!
“What you got a taste for?” His eyes don't move from the road in front of him. One hand steering the wheel while the other keeps its hold on your thigh. Skin easily warming under his touch, you force yourself to focus on what he's saying.
Having to keep yourself from suggesting, (for the first time in person but the eighth(?) to him) skipping dinner and going back to your place to make proper use of your time. You bite that down. He wanted to take you out to eat, so you planned to humor him. Eat with him so he can eat you out. Simple.
“Anything, really. You like pasta. Should we just go to that Italian place?” With a slight nod, he's directing the car toward the restaurant. The smile on his face lets you know that he had been secretly hoping to get to eat there tonight. It was his favorite place to go, knew the menu like the back of his hand.
So he's pleased that you're suggesting it.
The car ride is filled with soft music and playful banter about whatever comes to mind. He's challenging you, saying things that he knows will get under your skin just to hear you argue why he's wrong. Laughing as you outline all the reasons why mints and chocolate should be far away from each other.
He keeps a gentle hand on the small of your back as he leads you into the restaurant. Still egging you on with why he thinks you're wrong, laughing at the way your face twists up at him. Pausing only briefly to get your table, but the debate is in full swing the moment the two of you are settled across from each other.
There's a subtle type of competitiveness in his tone, paired with the playful smile on his face. Not even a full hour here with him and you were starting to see what Jimin was talking about. Being out with Hoseok, talking beyond where you should do it next, was something you never considered.
It's nice.
JANUARY 30TH, 2021 | 19:59
Conversation between the two of you doesn't die down even after your food is being set down in front of you. You're only now noticing that you never really talked to Hoseok before. You were friends, of course, that's what the 'F' in FWB stood for, but you were more like group friends.
Never really hung out alone until some months ago when you were starting this whole thing up. And fucking didn't really account for all that much talking. You knew nothing about him aside from the fact he was Taehyung's asshole womanizer roommate. No idea how witty, how animated, how attractive he could be.
It made you want him even more.
He's in the middle of explaining the King Henry VIII drama he had seen the other night, which is also surprising. He almost seemed 'too cool' to be this interested in a period piece starring Natalie Portman. But he's speaking so excitedly, that you can't help but hang on to every word from his lips. All until your phone is flashing on the table beside you, Taehyung's smiling face lighting up the screen.
The buzz steals both of your attention from the conversation, your brow furrowing slightly. A part of you knows that he's only calling for nonsense, probably in the midst of a fight with his girlfriend and he's calling for you to tell him he's right. It's hardly ever an emergency when he's calling you, so there should be no problem with letting his call go to voicemail.
Especially this close to the end of your date, you'd be heading back home with Hoseok in no time. Plus he could just text you if it was something important. There was no reason to answer, and yet, you can't keep your hand from reaching for the device. Shooting an apologetic smile over at Hoseok.
“He knows I'm with you... he wouldn't call if-,” The nod of Hoseok's head cuts you off, waving you away with a smile to take your call. And you're excusing yourself quickly, pressing the phone to your ear once you're far enough away from the table.
He better have his dick caught in a mousetrap or something to justify interrupting your dinner. “Tae. What's going on?” You listen, for any telling sounds of things being out of the ordinary. All you hear is the hum of the TV and his heavy breathing hitting the line.
“Yn, you've gotta get over here.” There's an urgency in his voice that has the hairs on the back of your neck standing. “Why? What's going on?” It's probably something stupid, it usually is when it comes to Taehyung. But curiosity has already set in and you find yourself thinking of how to tell Hoseok you have to go.
“I can't just tell you... you have to come,”
Groaning into the phone, your hand lifts to pinch the base of your nose. A deep sigh leaving your lips. “Tae. I'm out right now. If this isn't urgent-”
He's quick to cut your words, “It really can't wait.” He almost sounds serious, which has the slight annoyance you feel melting away. “Okay, okay. I'll be there in a minute,” Quick to hang up the phone and head back over to the table.
Hoseok has his head bowed, full attention on the plate of lasagna as he shovels forkfuls into his mouth. Reaching for his glass as you slip back into your seat, gulping down his water. And you're two seconds from telling him that you have to go when he's reaching for his napkin, wiping the corner of his lips.
“Taehyung needs you to rush over?” How he was able to just guess that is beyond you, but you're nodding your head a sheepish smile taking over your features. “He says it's urgent,” You genuinely feel bad. Even though things between Hoseok weren't any deeper than hooking up, you still had agreed to come out with him. To stay out with him.
To leave in the middle of it (not to mention before you could wrap everything up and go back home) felt shitty. You were having a good time getting to know him, but if you didn't go see what was going on with Taehyung, you knew it would bother you for the rest of the night.
Despite everything, Hoseok seems to understand. Insisting you finish the rest of your risotto before he's paying the bill. He even keeps up with the bubbly conversation from earlier, enjoying the sound of your laughter all the way to the car. Guiding you in with a gentle hand on the small of your back.
He lets you choose the music and hums along with the songs you play. It's not long before he's pulling up in front of his house, car staying on as he steps on the brake. You wait for him to put the car in park and when he doesn't, you're shooting a confused look in his direction.
“You're not coming in?”
He's quick to shake his head, fingers tapping against the steering wheel. “I'm gonna go see what's up with those girls in building E.” Oh. Right. You almost forgot for a second who you were dealing with. Jung Hoseok, notorious fuck boy. If he wasn't sleeping with you, then he'd just find someone else to do it with.
Feeling bad for cutting your date short was useless. “See you later, then.” He meets your words with a nod, waiting patiently for you to get out of his car. Spares a moment to lift his hand in a wave before he's speeding down the road.
JANUARY 30TH, 2021 | 20:21
Taehyung is sat on the couch when you enter the house. Hunched over a bowl with chopsticks in hand. Torso bare and hair falling in a ruffled mess around his face. He doesn't budge at the sound of the door, too focused on pushing long strings of spicy noodles into his mouth.
He could've at least put together a fake emergency if he was going to call you over like this. Pretended his arm was broken or something, instead of coolly sitting on the couch trying to gulp down his beer around the mouthful of Ramen.
“Hey! What's so urgent? Why are you half-naked?” Your loud voice startles him, droplets of beer falling from his lips and rolling down his chest. He swallows, reaching forward to grab up a napkin, using it to wipe at his well worked on pecs.
Your eyes follow the movement of his hand, long fingers brushing the droplets from his tanned skin. It must be the anticipation of getting fucked tonight because you're finding it hard to tear your gaze from the ripples of his stomach. “I'm in from the gym,” He explains the no shirt, the tightness in his arms that have fallen victim to your greedy stare. Flexing obviously as he reaches for his drink again, taking a few sips before he's picking up his bowl. His chest tenses with the movement.
Has he always been this... wow? Quite literally staring in the middle of the room, greedily enjoying the sight of your best friend without his shirt on. Yet, it's not the first time you've seen him sans shirt. Countless sleepovers and pool parties, but his bare stomach seemed different now.
Seriously. Did he always have abs like that?
You're forcing yourself to look away, face grimacing at the loud burp he lets out. Enough to snap you from your thoughts, wherever they were going was uncharted territory. And you had no interest in exploring that, especially when you were supposed to be annoyed with him!
“What's the problem? Why'd you make me rush over?” Wearily, you step closer to him. Eyes scanning over his body in a less pervy way, trying to detect any sign of injury. Maybe even a paper cut a little too deep. “Are you okay?” Your face inches from his, still searching.
He's laughing, hand lifting to rest on your forehead, pushing your head back slightly. “I'm fine. Want some?” Taehyung lifts the bowl between the two of you. And your gaze drops to the spicy scent. And normally you'd be letting out an excited whoop, accepting his generous offer and plopping down beside him.
But right now, all you are is annoyed. Annoyed and frustrated. If it wasn't for him, no doubt you'd be off somewhere with Hoseok, minutes from having your eyes rolled back, nails scraping against his skin. Instead, you're here, no emergency in sight. You shaved for this! Matched your lingerie for this! What a waste.
“Are you fucking kidding me!? I was out with Hoseok, Taehyung.” As if he didn't know. And he had the audacity, to sit there, slurping his noodles as if he wasn't at fault for this annoying ache in the pit of your stomach. Something that would've been long taken care of if it wasn't for him.
His shoulders lift in an uninterested shrug, jaw falling slack as he shovels another mouthful into his mouth. “Well... now you're not. It's extra spicy. Your favorite,” He's offering more food up to you and all you do is roll your eyes, letting out a frustrated huff.
“You're fucking ridiculous,” You scoff, hands rummaging through the contents of your purse until your fingers are catching onto your phone. “I'm calling Hoseok,” You announce for no real reason, especially because he acts as if he hasn't heard your words. Attention back on the hot bowl in his lap.
He's being weird and you don't know what it is. Noticed it in doses these past few days and assumed it would just blow over... but he just seemed to be acting more and more out of character the more time passed. It confused you. And you hated being confused.
Part of you was convinced that it had something to do with him now knowing that you're sleeping with his roommate. The side comments, inadvertently trying to cock block, and now this being proof enough. But there was another part of you... a much smaller, poorly trained part, that was convinced these were the actions of a jealous man.
What would he have to be jealous of, right? It wasn't like he wanted to be the one sleeping with Hoseok. Well, debatable... but seriously, the way he's been acting lately has led you to believe that there was something else going on that he wasn't telling you. Tae's known the guys you've fucked around with before and never has he acted so... stiff?
Something changed. Something was different. And you can't help but wonder if the picture incident had something to do with it. Highly unlikely, as Joon said, he has probably already forgotten about it. But, nothing else made sense.
Hoseok doesn't answer. Not like you actually expected him to. He went to 'see what's up with the girls in Building E'. No doubt busy with that, why would he answer his phone? “Come on, Yn.” Taehyung is beside you now, you're not sure when he stood up, but you can smell the sweetness of his body spray. Even after the time, he spent in the gym.
“Listen, I'm sorry I interrupted you.” His hand is reaching to lower your phone, halting your request for an Uber. “...but you're here now. Just stay. Relax.” Flashing that breathtaking smile of his and it's becoming apparent how he gets away with so much. This boy knew how to use his looks to his advantage, there was no denying that.
But, you're not easily fooled. “You can't just interrupt my dates because you're lonely,” Some of the bite is gone from your tone. Not entirely sure how upset with him you really were. Of course, calling you out when he knew you were with someone else was shitty... but it was Taehyung!
A terrible reason, but the best one you could come up with. There was no way staying mad at him was an option, when he has done the reverse many times with you involved. He's smirking at you, picking up on the anger melting away from your features. “So it was a date. You told me it was just dinner,” He teases.
Not entirely pissed at him anymore, but that didn't mean you'd just let his stupidity slide. This was the second time he's interfered with your much needed Vitamin D and it was about time he heard something about it. “Just dinner. A date. A fucking square dance. Taehyung, you can't just cut in because you want.” He's looking at you funny, this dazed expression that you've never seen directed to you before. From him.
It makes your heart stutter, so you ignore it. “What if I did the same with you? If you were out with Ailee and I called you up with some stupid excuse?” He doesn't even hesitate, dark eyes glued to yours. A stare so intense, you feel the heat rising to your cheeks. “I'd come running,” The deepness of his voice and the seriousness of his tone has your breath hitching.
There was no way this was happening. You were used to flirty Taehyung, got pretty good at compartmentalizing your feelings when it came to the Taehyung that you dealt with on a day-to-day basis. But this... this was different. Uncharted territory, indeed. The way he was looking at you? Talking to you? Nothing like you've ever handled before when it came to him.
No idea how you were supposed to react, so you decide to just leave to keep from making a fool of yourself in front of him. “I'm leaving. Goodnight, Taehyung. Call your girlfriend.” A halfhearted request, you're really just reminding yourself that he has one. And while 'The Other Woman' was a great song, that wasn't you.
“She broke up with me like an hour ago,” Again? You want to say, feigning disbelief. Their routine breakups were far from surprising and they always ended up in the same way: them back together and holed up in Taehyung's room for days on end. Only to end in a pointless fight that would repeat the cycle.
They were always broken up, but that didn't mean they were done with each other. It never meant that. “Please, stay.” He's pouting obnoxiously, so you're confused why you find it so cute. Fingers laced with yours as he lightly shakes your arm. “I miss hanging out with you,” Puppy dog eyes aimed right at your heart.
He's not wrong. It's been a little while since the two of you just hung out. Lounged around in sweats, ate, and watched bad TV. And it was very unlikely that Hoseok would be returning your call. Jimin is surely busy with Jungkook or something. You'd just be going home to sit around and do exactly what you could do here.
“Fine.” Eyes rolling to exaggerate your annoyance. “Go make another packet while I change,” Soft hair bounces as he nods his head, turning to pick up his half-empty bowl from the coffee table, carrying it into the kitchen.
You're halfway up the stairs before he's calling out to you, smiling when he sees your head poke around the corner. “I'm really sorry I ruined your date. That was not cool,” There's sincerity in his tone and in his eyes, every last bit of annoyance or frustration you felt dissipating at the sight.
“It's fine,” The prettiest smile he's ever seen pushes onto your lips, nearly stealing his breath away. “I'll just have to text Hoseok and explain your issue with separation,” Giggling at your own lighthearted joke and he's matching the sound.
Silently praying you hurry upstairs so he can get his heart in check. So he could think. Something he's been skipping out on that since the moment he picked up his phone and decided to call you.
JANUARY 30TH, 2021 | 21:43
You're wearing basketball shorts. His basketball shorts. Paired with a sports bra that you must've left here for one reason or another. It takes everything in him not to zero in on the jiggle of your ass as you pass him. The pebble of your nipples pushing against the fabric. You always complained about how cold his apartment was.
He tries not to stare as you stretch to pull a bowl from the cupboard, laughing out loud when you realize that he's already taken one down for you. Thanking him as you move to stand close. Your cheeks are red and irritated from the quick way you removed your makeup with the dried-out wipes you left in his bathroom. Hair let out of the tight ponytail, cascading down your back in pretty waves.
It's not until you're pinning him with a furrowed brow and an upturn of your upper lip, does he realize he's literally gawking at you. With this unmistakable love-struck look in eyes. “Why are looking at me like that?” Spoken while plucking a piece of meat from the pan and pushing it into your mouth.
Caught and he doesn't even think of trying to backtrack. With a shrug of his shoulders, he's turning his attention back to the food in front of him. “I don't know. You just look beautiful or whatever,” He can hardly look at you as the words leave his lips, afraid you'll catch the blush on his cheeks.
“Or whatever?” You joke with a laugh, ignoring the flip of your stomach at the compliment. Instead, you move to the fridge, retrieving a couple of eggs while chastising him on forgetting the best part. Not sure what was up with him, but you refuse to let yourself get carried away.
You've spent so long accepting that he has and only will see you as a friend. Best friend, even. And just because he was throwing a few compliments your way didn't mean that everything all of a sudden changed. Nothing has changed. The two of you were still in the same spot you had been two years ago.
Taehyung serves you with a smile ten minutes later, fingers lingering on yours for a moment longer than normal. Not long enough to be weird, but definitely long enough to get the wheels turning in your brain. And then he's plopping down across from you like nothing, head ducked as he takes the first steamy bites of his food.
It takes everything in him not to profess his unclear feelings. Trying to limit how often he looks at you, censoring his thoughts as they teeter between mushy and cringe. It's hard with the way you're joking between bites the way you always do, he can't help but notice how pretty you are.
He felt lucky to have you like this. Even if it wasn't truly having you. Just the fact that you were comfortable enough around him to be like this. Even if it had been years, it felt different now somehow.
Everything felt different since he's started to notice little things about you that he failed to see all along. Your cute habit of flicking and tossing your hair as you spoke, more often with how animated you got. How your eyes lit up when you were excited. That tiny dimple at the corner of your mouth, which only made an appearance when you were laughing really hard.
On top of it all, he was noticing how obvious you were. Not exactly sure when it clicked in his mind and it could very well be his ego talking, but he was starting to feel like he wasn't the only one keeping a mental scrapbook. The more attention he paid to you and your little mannerisms, the more he picked up on the fact that you were doing the same.
Whenever he'd bite his lip, rest his cheek on his palm, angle his head in a certain way – your eyes would follow. And how could he forget the lust-filled look on your face as your eyes devoured him, it hadn't even been a full ten minutes since you got there and you were so obvious.
A wonder he didn't notice it before, but now that he thinks back... all of the signs were there. Everything that he missed has been screaming at him for the past-however-many years. And as much as he wanted to do something about it, he knew he had to be careful.
Extremely careful.
JANUARY 30TH, 2021 | 23:52
Right now, you had your legs in his lap – ankle inches from his junk, but that's the least of your concerns. You're more focused on tucking every last crumb of weed into the paper, eyes flickering between your fingers and the TV screen.
“How is she this oblivious?” You're commenting with a wrinkle of your brow and Taehyung has to act like he's been following the plotline all along.
From what he was able to pick up with your brief summary of the plot and the way you talked over every scene with backstory, the main character was set the be married to a man with much more experience than her. In life. In the bedroom. The scene playing in front of you right now she was just finding out that he had been lying about not being able to have children.
You had suggested starting from episode one, but he denied the offer. There was something about watching you explain a show while getting frustrated about the scenes that played out before you that he found endearing. Not a new feeling, but holding a new meaning now.
He can hardly hear what's being said because you're in the middle of a rant on how there was no reason for her to be so clueless and sent into a marriage. And how her mother should've gone into the nitty-gritty before shipping her off. And how her husband was just a compliment douche bag for taking advantage of her ignorance.
Taehyung is positive he looks like you just agreed to go riding off in the sunset. Leaned back against the couch and watching you with this dazed-dopey expression that you sum up to him just being high. You were working on rolling the second joint you'd share.
His eyes follow as you lean forward, hovering over his lap as you reach for the lighter on his side. Not even thinking to ask him to pass it over, not that he's complaining about the closeness. Elbows holding your body up as you fiddle with the spark, bringing it toward you when it stays.
You catch his stare as you exhale, handing the joint off to him before moving back to your end of the couch, legs falling back in his lap. He doesn't pull his gaze from you, letting the weed burn out between his fingers. “What?” You're asking with a soft laugh. He's hissing out a breath, bringing the smoke to his lips and inhaling.
“You're fucking gorgeous, it's annoying.” He says with a shake of his head, a thick cloud of smoke leaving his lips. “You're always talking shit,” Speaking through a burst of laughter, but he doesn't entertain the thought any further. Extending his hand to pass it over, eyes flickering up to the screen.
There had been something that he had paid attention to when you first turned this show on. The conversation that was being had on the screen about best friends and getting married and falling in love. And how that's how you should do it. Marry your best friend and it would work out.
No matter how many porn-like sex scenes appeared after that, he was still stuck on that one conversation. And the thought that if you looked so pretty next to him right now, there was no telling how much prettier you'd look done up and dressed in white. He has to laugh at himself, though.
Blaming his raging thoughts on the half-empty bottle of liquor on the table and the green you're handing back over to him. Which is why he doesn't bother to stop the question that slips out next. “Do you think that's really the key?”
Half forgot that even though you never left his mind, you couldn't read it. So you have no idea what he's talking about. “Key to what?”
“Being happy in a relationship?”
He hardly ever really talked about his feelings being with Ailee. You just knew what he told you and that was very limited. She annoyed him, but she was sometimes funny and knew what she was doing. That was pretty much it.
So you're a little shocked that he all of a sudden was bringing this up as if you knew their relationship from a hole in the wall. “Are you not happy with Ailee?” Someone who fought with their significant other as much as Taehyung did, couldn't really be happy. But you could be wrong.
“I'm sure I could be happier,” He's looking at you with those eyes again, flicking the ash off with his finger before bringing the joint back to his lips. “Do you think falling n love with your best friend is the key to all that?” He pauses, the blurts the last part out like he's lost control of his tongue. “Like you and me,”
You're letting out a harsh cough that has nothing to do with the smoke cruising through your lungs. Eyes tearing up while your back shakes. “Me and you?” You manage, letting out a gasped breath. “Like me falling in love with you and you falling in love with me?” Finger used to point between the two of you, just to be sure.
Taehyung nods his head, unphased by your dramatic reaction. “Yes, that's exactly how that would work. A money-less transaction,” You're letting out a laugh and a shake of your head, pushing the thought from your head. He was only joking, talking shit for whatever reason.
“Yeah, no. That would never work out,”
His words chase yours, “Why not?” You don't miss the small pout of his lips, as if he's actually asking. Wondering why you thought the two of you together wouldn't work out.
“I know too much. You know too much,” Going with the first reason that pops in your head, one that you've used countless times with convincing yourself. “There's gotta be some mystery,”
Taehyung is rolling his eyes, “Oh, come on. We're not the Scooby-doo kids, Yn. Mystery is overrated.” He's really pushing for this and you're not sure why. Most likely entertaining the thoughts that pop into his foggy mind, so you don't allow yourself to think too hard on his words.
Or what they could mean. “It's perfect,” He continues. “You meet someone, become best friends, decide to fall in love and now you're married to your best friend. That's the dream,” He says with a grin. And you're not sure if he's actually talking about you or if he's just talking.
“That's lazy,” Either way, you attempt to get the race of your heart to slow down. No matter how much closer he was to you now, backs of your thighs pressed against his. You're nearly seated in his lap and you just now noticed the mindless way his fingers drag over your knee. “You can't pick off from your existing friends. You meet someone, fall for them and then you become best friends,”
His laugh rings through your ears, then your entire body. Just the sound has you feeling warm all over, something that you were sure you had gotten under control a long time ago. “You just said the same thing as me, except you changed the last two steps,”
“It makes a huge difference,” It did. One was the two of you and the other could be any two strangers on the street. For the sake of you, your version was the one you'd go with. Anything else and it would be hard to talk yourself out of it.
But Taehyung has been a lot more attention, putting the pieces together as they appear. And one thing he was always good at spotting (except when it came to you for some reason) was when someone was into him. And judging from the subtle changes in your demeanor throughout this entire conversation, you were so into him.
With caution on his mind, he's shifting focus. Hand lowering to discard the dead bit in the ashtray. Leveling you with a squinted eyes and a purse of his lips. “What's the real reason you didn't want me to know about Hoseok?” Sort of had an idea of what this might be, but he wanted to hear it from you.
“What do you mean? I already told you,” You're reaching for the bottle on the table, taking a swig to keep your hands busy. And to keep you from having to look at him, no doubt the unfiltered thoughts in your mind would be slipping out with one glance.
He doesn't pull his gaze from you, though. “No, you said you didn't want things to get awkward. I think that was a lie,” His face is much closer to yours now, you can clearly see the faint beauty marks scattered against his skin.
Just a simple stretch of his leg and you're pushed further on to his lap. Back resting against his arm now that he has his hand is pressed against the armrest. He's close, but not suffocating, has left enough space for you to get up and move if you wanted to. But that's the farthest thing from your mind right now.
“Wanna know what I think it is?” Voice so low he might as well be mumbling. His eyes flicker down to your lips, noting how soft they look. And he finds himself wondering just how they'd feel pressed against his. “What?” You sound breathless like you had been thinking about the same exact thing.
He's smoothly moving his arm from you, guiding the way your back falls against the couch. “I think you're into me, like how I'm into you... and you didn't want me to know because of that,” The risk of fucking up your friendship takes the backseat because he knows he's right. Took his time and put the signs together.
“Yeah, right.” You laugh it off, but he's learned how obvious you are.
A grin spreads over his features, hand dropping to your hip. “You're making the face you do when you've been caught,” The heat of his palm spreading from your side to your entire body. And you've come to terms with the fact that you've lost control of your heart. Wrapped up in the moment where Taehyung, Kim Taehyung, your best friend and former crush revealed he was into you.
His head bows, nose nudging against yours. It's embarrassing the way your lips instantly pucker, eyes falling shut as you wait for the soft press. Eyes fluttering open after a moment of waiting and receiving nothing, catching the devious smirk on his lips.
“You're into me, aren't you?” While he was sure, positive after seeing how ready you were to have him kiss you, he needed to hear it. Needed to be sure that he wasn't missing something, he's been doing a lot of that lately.
The nod of your head is answer enough, followed by your warm hand reaching to rest on the back of his neck. Not sure who moved first, if you were pulling him down or he was lowering himself and you really didn't care.
A tiny moan escapes from your lips as he shifts above you, the sound being sent straight to his crotch. His mouth is pulling from yours, brows raised and eyes wide as he stares down at you – surprised by the fact that you could actually sound like that. Before he's given a chance to comment on it, you're pulling him back down.
Kissing you is everything he's imagined it to be and more. The soft push of your tongue paired with the deliberate scrap of teeth on his lip. Your hummed moans fill the room and stir him on, his grip falling from your hip to your thigh. Easily pulling your legs apart to slot himself between them.
Fingers tangled in his hair and heavy breath hitting his lips each time you pull away, only to dive right back in. Mouths moving over each other messily, Taehyung can barely ask the groans that die on your lips. Free hand pressed against his chest, you can feel the hammer of his heart.
Thighs squeezed to his hips, bodies so close the thinnest of papers wouldn't fit. So it's no wonder you feel it. The twitch of his cock hardening against you, so enticing you can't help the way your hips lift to meet his just as he's dropping down to press into you. A hissed moan falling from your lips at the contact.
“Fuck,” He's groaning, a switch seemingly turning on inside of him. Mouth breaking for yours and hand moving up the toward your chest. His thumb brushes over your hardened nipple through the fabric of your bra as he rolls his hips into yours.
Just the heat from pressing against you like this was enough to rile him up, mind reeling with thoughts of what it would be like to really fuck you. And the sounds you'd make. You sounded so pretty with the simple rolls of his hips, what if he was actually buried deep inside of you.
His head drops, mouth latching onto the crook of your neck to suckle at the skin there. Your senses are fogged with nothing but him. The smell of him, the feel, the taste. Still lingering on your lips and hitting your taste buds as you lick them. There's a definite heat growing between your legs with each drag of his covered cock, angled perfectly that he's just barely tapping your clit.
You want more. So much more and it's making you delirious. Needy. Hips rolling up to meet his and he's pushing you down every time. Teeth scraping against your skin and fingers pinching at your chest. “Taehyung,” It sounds more desperate than you intend it to. He's groaning back in response, face lifting from your skin to admire the red mark he's left behind.
Tongue dragging over it, soothing it with a simple swipe. Hands re-positioned on either side of your head, his gaze drops to watch the way your hips move in order to meet his, a smirk pressed on his lips. “Fuck, look at you... such a mess.” He's pushing forward, cock meeting your clit perfectly.
Strained whimper ripping through your throat as you brace your hands on his side, back arching into him. “Grinding that pretty pussy all over my cock, didn't even let me get undressed. You're so wet, huh?” Now you knew what the boys were on about when they clowned him for being mouthy. Had laughed along before, but having his words directed to you was no laughing matter.
You knew what you were doing. You could feel the effect of what you were doing but something about having him point it out in that breathy tone of his was hot. What you didn't expect was for him to want you to talk back, but the slow of his hips is quickly warning you of your role.
“Don't stop,” You're gasping, hands reaching out to him. “I could cum like this,” Your whispering, cheeks heating up at the admission. How embarrassing, losing it over dry humping, you half expect him to laugh it off as a joke.
But he doesn't, instead, he's lowering his body back onto yours, the movement of his hips picking up in speed. “Me too,” He breathes out, fingers tangling in your hair as his tongue teases against your covered lips. “Wrap your legs around me,”
His words are muffled, but you understand him enough to lift your legs, ankles locking behind his back. He drives into you like he's balls deep inside of you, pulling gasps and moans from your lips. Nails pressed into his skin as you beg him not to stop, chanting your near release. And just as you feel it bubble up in your stomach, his low pants of your name getting to you. Just as you're about to be knocked over the edge you've been teetering on, Jin's voice is breaking through.
His loud laughter bleeding through the door behind you, followed by the low grumble of Joon's voice. The jingle of his key is what snaps Tae out of it, body freezing as his head lifts to glare at the door.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” You're quick to push him off, looking away as he adjusting the throbbing bulge in his pants – leaving you to wipe at the slobber-dampened mark on your chest. Jin and Joon are stepping in just as you're rushing upstairs for a shirt. Their laughter filling the downstairs as you rummage through drawers for something to pull on.
All while shoving your raging thoughts out of your mind. Still in shock that that actually happened... whatever that was. Taehyung was into you. He had said it and then kissed you. God, he kissed you. Would've been to be able to fully enjoy it if you weren't so damn greedy.
Just one taste and you were wanting the whole thing and from the look of it, he was willing to give it to you. But what if it had been a fluke. A one-off because of whatever happened to Ailee and the fact that you were there. Into you, but what did that really mean? Would that change anything?
You dare to hope, even though you're sure you're wrong. There was a lot going on tonight. Him fighting with Ailee, you being torn away from Hoseok before you can do anything properly. You were high! Still, high to be honest. Would he still be into you when he was sobering up?
Finding out is the last thing on your list. Fitting yourself as his best friend after your quiet crush was one thing. Doing that after he's taken back being into you was another. You didn't want to think about what a disaster that would be, you'd rather just go home and sleep.
Jin is turning to happily greet you as you make your way downstairs, while Joon makes room for you on the couch. Taehyung doesn't look up, cheeks flushed and eyes glued to his knees. You'd give everything to know what he's thinking.
“Yn! Tae said you were here. We're gonna open Monopoly, wanna play?” It's an invitation from Jin that you'd usually be jumping at. Claiming your designated money bag piece without a thought, so he's shocked when you're shaking your head. “Think I'm gonna just head home, turn in early.”
Tae looks up at the sound of your departure, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. He had hoped you would want to stay, so he could have a chance to talk to you properly. Tell you how he was feeling even if he didn't fully understand it yet. He wanted to tell you that he liked you and he wanted to hear you say it back.
Let you know that he wanted to try to be good at relationships because he wanted to try with you. He's standing with that in mind, shrinking back when you're looking at him. There before did he feel nervous around you, but with all this weighing on his chest, he doesn't know how else to feel.
“Let me walk you home,” He offers, it's a twenty-minute walk across campus. Enough time for him to talk to you... or just be around you for longer.
You're shaking your head, though. Pushing an easy smile onto your lips. “It's fine. I texted Jimin,” It's a lie and he knows it is, but he doesn't call you on it. Obvious that you didn't want to be around him. Most likely regretting the whole thing.
Nodding as he plops back down beside Jin. He watches as you pull your shoes back on, throwing a quick goodbye over your shoulder before stepping out. Not even sparing a proper look in his direction. A huff leaves his lips as he sinks into the couch, hands tugging through his hair.
He really screwed up.
>> PART TWO COMING...SATURDAY.
— you’ve always been cute, soft, tiny in taehyung’s eyes. but that’s changing one night when you’re accidentally sending him a naughty picture. forcing him to realize, maybe his best friend is kinda… hot?
⥫ masterlist ⥭
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A/N: timestamps make sense throughout the fic. if u want to be added to the tag list, send me an ask! + if you’ve asked to be on my permanent taglist, you do not need to ask to be added to this one !!
#taehyung#taehyung smut#taehyung fluff#bts smut#🔥 sm au#taehyung fic#taehyung sm au#taehyung imagine#taehyung angst#kim taehyung#taehyung x reader#kim namjoon#kim seokjin#min yoongi#jung hoseok#park jimin#jeon jungkook#namjoon#jin#yoongi#hoseok#jimin#jungkook#bts#bts imagine#bts sm au#namjin#jikook
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(Two things, 1. This is my first time requesting so I'm sorry if this is not the thing to do it, and 2. Sorry if somethings is misspelled or grammatically incorrect, eng is not my first language:p)
May I request some of the bros, specially Mammon, Luci and Satan, with a MC who's similar to Lucifer in some aspects (like, some of their manners are the same as his and sometimes they're little bit too strict) and after a while they discover that its bc MC is also an older sibling. And (only if you want) meeting their younger sibling, please 🙏
Btw love your works ♡♡♡
Lucifer Number 2~
(Feat. GN!MC and the Demon Bros)
✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦
Lucifer
It doesn't occur to Lucifer how similar the two of you are, but the first thing he realizes is how pleasant conversations with you can be. You both share common interests, your tastes suit his own, and you seem to be the only competent person in this house.
You're the responsible type, and he likes it. He'll sometimes find you scolding his brothers for their behavior too, and as amusing of a sight as that may be, he doesn't want you to be burdened with their idiocy.
AND you're the eldest sibling in your household? Cheers to that. You too know the weight of being the responsible oldest, and the role one must take to ensure their siblings grow up well. You too know that you'd rather your siblings have things easier than you did.
But there's one thing he finds annoying... You can NEVER speak your feelings, and act as if it’d kill you to do so. He can respect secrecy when it's appropriate, but Lucifer would like to know what's on your mind. Not only that, but you can be HORRIBLY headstrong. There's nothing that can stray you away from what you've already decided.
"MC, I request that you take a few days off from school to do as you please. I've already spoken with Diavolo and your professors, and you've been given an excuse. I know you'll study anyway, so I've dropped off your assignments in your room. But... you should rest. It isn't good for you to be pushing yourself so hard. Hm? You're calling me a hypocrite?"
Mammon
As if one Lucifer wasn't enough. Now there's TWO of em?! Why's his luck gotta be so lousy!
Definitely the first to realize how much like Lucifer you are, and was SHOOK. Seriously, what gives?! What horrors exist in the human world that could've made you like THAT..?
Ever since you showed up, it's been impossible to get away with anything! He can't sneak out of the house because you're always there somehow, you tattle on him when you catch him leaving anyone's room, and you won't even let him copy your homework! What gives?!
Avoids you like the plague. You're no fun! There's only rare moments when you're kinda okay, and he likes those the best. The times when you're kinda sensitive and you'll drop the high and mighty act. But then you're back to being a pest!
"For the billionth time, I ain't got time to study! There's money to be made, and a guy like me ain't gonna waste a second lookin' at a dumb book when I could be- H-Huh?! You're gonna call Lucifer?! N-now, there's no need to be so hasty, right? Oi!! I'm sorry, damn it-!"
Levi
What's the deal with Lucifer number two? As comedic of a trope as that may be, Levi doesn't really care for having two nagging types in the house. Especially a human...
When you're in his room, all you do is nitpick about how he should tidy up and open a window! Don't you know that an otaku's room is his pride and joy?! It's a sacred space not to be trampled on by the opinions of a normie!!!
But still... he has to admit that even if you don't get all the stuff he's talking about, you at least try to understand it. And there are even some of his interests that you're genuinely invested in!
You might be a pain in the neck and harass him about annoying things, but he guesses he can deal with it if you'll actually sit through a TSL marathon with him...
"I-I'll lend you this manga, so make sure you read it! And when you're finished with that, I'll lend you the spin-off series by the author's brother! I know you'll like it, since you're interested in gritty stuff. Oh, and- Huh? My laundry? Y-yeah.... I'll do that.."
Satan
You are... surprisingly good company. Satan enjoys talking to you over afternoon tea, and the two of you share stories between one another.
But still, he can't shake the feeling that there's something... unpleasantly familiar about your personality. It isn't until you say something that sounds suspiciously similar to what Lucifer would say that he realizes who you remind him of. And oh, he hates it.
Tries playing pranks on you, but somehow they never go to plan. How that is is beyond him, but you never fall for anything! No matter how sweet his smile, you're always rightfully suspicious. You're annoyingly meticulous about checking your surroundings, and you're so aware of yourself that it's troublesome! Be more gullible!!
The king of petty has decided that its now his life goal to make you fall for at least one of his pranks. He doesn't care how elaborate he has to make it, or how unrewarding the payoff may be. He'll make you pay for seeing his brother in two places at once.
"MC, would you like to join me this afternoon for a book reading? Though, I'd love it if you could read this book in particular. I think you'll find it very-.... Hm? 'Isn't this the cursed book that makes you grow hair all over your body', you ask? Ahaha.... tch."
Asmo
Come now, there can't be TWO killjoys in the house! That's way too depressing!! It was funny at first to see that there's someone who can match the scary Lucifer's energy, but now it's becoming a nuisance!
You won't even go to the countless parties he's invited you to! Hell, you barely even give yourself room to mess around a little? Isn't it boring being so tightly wound? You're in luck, because the adorable Asmo-chan knows the PERFECT way to let loose~
You'll RARELY let him close to you, and that's usually when you're tired of him harassing you. Then he gets the honor of playing with your hair while you've got no energy to fight back! He'll style it wonderfully for you!
Also nags you to take better care of yourself. You're not a demon, so you have to care for your health! These late night study sessions are giving you bags under your eyes! And stop taking on so many extracurricular activities!
"Geez, MC! I didn't think you'd die from overworking, but that's the path you're headed on! You really are like Lucifer, you know? That being said, I'll do my best to make sure you relax! Shall we begin~?"
Beel
Beel may not be too bothered by Lucifer's strictness, but that doesn't mean he's immune to it. To think that even a human can be like that...
It's nice to see that you can take care of yourself, but aren't you working too hard? Your grades are good and you've got many interesting talents, but you also have to properly rest.
Has started bringing you snacks on the regular. And don't even think about skipping meals, because he won't allow it. He'll literally pick you up and bring you to the table if he has to. And if you're staying up late to study? He'll carry you to bed. Don't try to protest.
Beel is your babysitter now and there's nothing you can do about it. It's good to be responsible, but don't think about trying to take care of everyone else if you can't care for yourself. Now eat these twelve meat buns he bought for you.
"MC, let's eat lunch together. I know you were going to skip because I heard you talking to Solomon earlier, and I won't let you. Ah, don't worry about not having money, because I've already bought you some lunch. Let's eat in the courtyard."
Belphie
NO.... IT CAN'T BE... THIS HAS TO BE A NIGHTMARE....HE WANTS TO WAKE UP....
You're such a drag. You harass him to attend student council meetings, but him about his studies, and won't let him avoid a single obligation he has. What are you, his mother?
Has 100% joined forces with Satan to try to make you fall for many, many unsuccessful pranks. Are you curse proof or something? When he tried a '10 hour bed-head' spell on you, it just rebounded right to him! Then he found out that you'd borrowed a spell repelling amulet from Solomon and realized just how prepared you are...
When you aren't bothering his entire soul by trying to make him do things, you're actually nice to talk to. You're knowledgeable, you pay attention to the people around you, and you can always read a room. He likes to ask you for advice sometimes.
"Aren't you tired of being like that all the time? So... attentive, I mean. You should just take a nap some time. Or better yet, take the week off. Maybe I'll teach you how to properly relax? Then you might finally be able to take that stick out of your- ow... What're you hitting me for?"
#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me!#obey me! shall we date?#shall we date? obey me!#shall we date obey me#obey me scenarios#obey me imagines#obey me headcanons#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me levia tan#obey me levi#obey me satan#obey me asmo#obey me beel#obey me belphie#obey me asmodeus#obey me belphegor#obey me beelzebub
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hello i have a skephalo vampire au that ill never write but i want it out of my head, a plot outline under the cut, feel free to do whatever the fuck you wanna do with this id just love to see it if you do
Skephalo vampire au:
Bbh meets skeppy in the most unfortunate of circumstances, 12 year old skeppy gets bitten and kept as a vampire spawn with no will and servant to the vampire that bit him, bbh and his mentor raid the place and kill all the vampires, bbh takes pity on young skeppy, not being capable of killing a child he decides to feed him the blood of the vampire that bit him to free him of the trance and orders him to run, unbeknownst to his mentor.
Time skip 8 years later skeppy has left his hometown where he was bitten and is doing very well for himself, he is a very adept vampire with a clan thats like a family (think idots, invadedlands gang) he is rich and invests in real estate (lol) but tells people he is a magician for a living.
Vampires in this au can be in the sun but only for short amounts of time otherwise they’ll get bad skin burns eventually think 2-3 hours max, skeppys strong suit is that he can stay out in the sun double the amount and skeppy is very adept at using vampire compulsion in a way that makes people not realize, it’s very soft and more of a suggestion and planting ideas in people's heads he is also very good at blending in with normal people.
Skeppy decides he wants to go back to where he grew up on a whim one day, either to confront his past or something like that, everyone disagrees with him and the he shouldn't because that area isnt a safe space for vampires due to vampire hunters but he decides to hell with their warnings and leaves, they all follow him one by one eventually because theyre worried for him and theyre not gonna leave him alone in case he gets in trouble
In almost a string of fate type deal he immediately runs into bbh in a bakery/coffee shop looking for muffins, skeppy recognizes bbh and is almost floored he is just standing there staring at him in shock before he realizes he should probably act normal, he says hi and then he is worried at first that bbh will recognize him but he doesn't skeppy has changed very much from when he was 12, skeppy almost considers following bbh but he knows he is a hunter and doesn't want to risk it, instead he camps out the shop hoping to see him again and he does, bbh comes in every couple days for muffins and coffee
After a while he works up the courage to approach him out of impulse and to talk to him he doesn't know what compels him but he needs to know more about him
Essentially he tries super hard to befriend him, after a couple false assumptions about dating and a LOT of suspicion and shut downs, bbh agrees to hang out with him after skeppy tells him he is a magician and he gets roped in to do a show for kids that bbh teaches and skeppy is floored thats the thing that gets him to open up
Bbh hasnt been a hunter in a long time, he works as a teacher’s assistance for elementary kids, he does become a sort of a mentor to the dteam in terms of vampire hunting picking them up like strays over the years, dream especially is very gungho about being a hunter after a bad experience with werewolves and he is very good at studying and the reputation of the area being dangerous for the paranormal comes from him (i think itd be cool if he gets bit and turned into a vampire later on and skeppy gives his help and its a secret between them)
George comes from a family of witches/warlocks so he is already familiar with the paranormal he met bbh when they were both highschool age and they kinda just.. Knew that the other knew and stuck together
Sapnap was bad’s first stray he (dream being second) that he picked up after saving him he was orphaned after a real bad vampire attack and sapnap just kinda stuck to him like glue bad tried to avoid him but sapnap is persistent and real quickly bad kinda just warmed up to him and started teaching him and took on a more father figure role for him
Everyone jokes that skeppy really seems to want to date bad cuz skeppy is obsessed with bad and no one realizes why skeppy is so fascinated by bad in that he saved his life years ago, he knows bad would kill him if he knew what he was so he keeps it a secret and he is very good at blending in, he keeps wanting to see how far he can take it and after a bet from one of the idots (they dont know bad is a hunter) that he wouldnt be able to drink bad’s blood he takes it to a next level and starts a dance between them, bbh is immediately suspicious of skeppy and shares that suspicion with dteam only to be met with something along the lines of not everyone who is interested in you is out to kill you
Skeppy enjoys toying with bad and seeing how far he can go, its maddeningly harder than he thought to drink his blood, bbh is very prepared and very vigilante, any attempts of following him home are moot he always loses him, he still manages to fuck with him, bad is always doubting if skeppy is a vampire or not until he isnt either via dream getting bit and skeppy helping him and it coming out or something like that, but its important for it to come out after bad and skeppy have grown inseperably close so he doesnt kill him immediately lmao
Notable mentions technoblade and skeppy both were orphan vampires in a city and have a sort of camaraderie between them
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pls some headcanons for Bakugou, Shinsou and Shoto when the reader kisses them infront of everyone. Thank you :)
KISSING THEM IN FRONT OF EVERYONE
FT. BAKUGOU KATSUKI, SHINSOU HITSOHI
TODOROKI SHOUTO
SUMMARY: in which you and the boys kiss in public, and now everyone is screaming. oh no.
WORD COUNT: 2.1k
WARNING: season three spoliers, insecurities, arguments,
A/N: i wanted to do scenarios bc this was too good ugh thank YOU for requesting this
BAKUGO KATSUKI
lol so HAVE FUN WITH THIS ONE
you two are already dating but you keep it on the down low because its Katsuki and he’s like ew people knowing i have feelings other than anger? ew ew ew
you’re fine with it, but if he thinks its bothering you he’ll talk to you about it and smother you with affection, but he’ll act like its nothing
wants to rub it in his faces that you are his girlfriend, yes, but also he doesn’t want the teasing that comes with it. he knows for a fact that all his friends would bully him because he is SOFT FOR YOUUU and he’s also just a generally private person
you respect this and like it’s fine woo yeah okay it’s nice being the only one that sees the side of him that’s all soft and cute and affectionate
i can’t really see the two of you slipping up unless it’s influenced by a lot of emotions
where do these emotions come from? you might ask
his kidnapping.
you were a mess, but it was lowkey, real lowkey. and unlike the others you do not support trying to save katsuki on their own, trusting the heroes to do their job is the way to go.
so you don’t go with them. the next time you see your lovely boyfriend is when he’s giving kirishima money
so naturally, consumed by all the fear and panic you felt while he was gone, you kiss him!
and he kisses you back and its really soft and oh-
what a shame the whOLE CLASS IS THERE
everyone is really confused, but they’re happy because they think that the two of you finally addressed the clear tension between the two of you, all it took was a lil kidnapping
except then you pull apart, completely disregarding them, your hands on his face, “baby are you okay?”
you don’t call someone you haven’t kissed before baby
then it clicks for the rest of the class
SCREAMS.
so much yelling
oh god have fun with that one
the bakusquad is yelling at him for not telling him, the dekusquad is scolding you for not telling them, there’s just a lot of questionable things
katsuki will get SO FLUSTERED because this is not what we wanted
at least the attention was off of his kidnapping now
maybe that was your goal idk 👀
Katsuki really wished everyone would shut up about his kidnapping, it wasn’t something he wanted to think about right now, or ever if he was honest. So much had happened in the past few days and he was still struggling to process all of it, and the disgustingly warm welcome he’d received to the dorms wasn’t helping. It was gross.
He’d shoved cash into Kirishima’s hand, rolling his eyes when he began to panic at the possibility that he’d taken it from Denki, shutting down the idea almost immediately.
And then he saw her.
Y/N was shoving past everyone and heading to him, and he couldn’t help the relief he felt when he saw her. Katsuki was grateful she hadn’t been involved in the little escape plan Deku had hatched out, but seeing her made him feel calmer than even as she practically tackled him, hands coming to his cheeks as she brought him into a kiss.
Their lips molded together perfectly, his hands coming to her sides and holding her like he’d never let go as her hands gripped his face rather harshly. It would have been the perfect moment, had the rest of his class not been there.
Y/N seemed to disregard this as she pulled apart, eyes darting across his figure as his brows furrowed at her clear distress. “Calm down, idiot.” His cheeks are turning red as he realizes that everyone is staring, but he can’t help but focus his attention on her as he feels a wave of relaxation wash over him as she begins to run her hands all over him in search of injuries.
“Oh, I’m sorry, for caring about your wellbeing.” She grumbled, wrapping her arms tightly around his torso when her hands left his face. “Baby, you scared me.” His arms wrapped around her shoulders securely, as he rolled his eyes, though Katsuki wouldn’t deny he was appreciating all the attention she was giving him, he was beginning to feel embarrassed as he allowed her to hold onto him.
As if the kiss hadn’t been enough to astonish the rest of their class, the pet name simply amplified their shocked as they all cried out, “baby?” Kirishima had exchanged looks with Mina, who looked equally confused before returning their gaze to Katsuki, a look of betrayal evident on both their faces.
Stupid barbarians. “SHUT UP EXTRAS!” Katsuki exclaimed, holding Y/N tighter to his chest as his cheeks flushed red, he could hear her laugh against his chest. “Can’t a guy hug his girlfriend in peace.”
“GIRLFRIEND?”
He was grateful for the subject change, though he didn’t appreciate the fact that his relationship had been exposed, until he looked back to Y/N, who beamed at him.
If she was happy then it was fine he supposed.
SHINSOU HITOSHI
welp
this one will probably have the funniest reaction
like
you did not just kiss him, in front of all these people, was that a joke?
i think he’s the only one you wouldn’t already be in a relationship with, purely because this is just 10x funnier
so ever since the two of you first started hanging, there have been people criticizing you for befriending him at all, because of his quirk, they just cannot believe that the Y/N L/N is hanging out with Shinsou Hitoshi
but also, ever since the two of you started hanging out, the bullying has lessened immensely, most because you threatened everyone it was really subtle, but they got the message
nobody screws with Y/N L/N
anyways, you two are probably hanging out again, and it’s been a while since you got one of those comments, which is the main reason this one sets you off.
“quit hanging out with that freak L/N, he’s gonna ruin your chances at becoming a pro.”
shinsou was used to this, and your violent reactions, so he immediately brought a hand to your arm to ensure you didn’t commit a murder, shaking his head at you
you turn back to him, and you’re lowkey glaring at him before turning your piercing eyes back to the other guys
and without breaking eye contact with them, you grab Shinsou’s face, earning stares from everywhere in the cafeteria, and then kiss him
shinsou is shocked
shinsou.exe
you killed him.
he did not anticipate this um, you kinda caught him by surprise with this one, he genuinely did not think it was possible for you to feel this way for him
when you pull away, the kiss is almost like magic
you don’t mess with Y/N’s friends, much less their boyfriend
When Y/N beams up at Shinsou, he can’t help the way his heart skips a beat. It’s ridiculous, he knows this, and he hates that he can’t prevent it. Shinsou is no fool, he knows Y/N L/N, a UA student that could potentially be a member of the Top Ten heroes in the future, would never like him. He wouldn’t be shocked if she befriended him entirely out of pity, given how students used to treat him prior to their unlikely friendship. She’d weaseled her way into his life, despite his attempts to avoid her, ignore her, and even tell her off, she’d stuck around.
And yes, Shinsou had made the mistake of liking her. On days like this, he’d entertain the possibility that Y/N liked him back, because sometimes she hugged him for longer than average friends did, or maybe she’d press a kiss to his cheek, or even hold his hands.
That was probably just something best friends did.
“Hitoshi! Don’t you know what this means?” She exclaimed, hands finding their way onto his shoulders in the middle of the cafeteria.
Yes, she used his first name.
Shinsou rolled his eyes, trying to keep himself from getting flustered purely because her hands were on him, “Y/N it’s not a big deal, and besides-”
“We’re going to be in the same class!” Her hands move from his shoulders to around them as she pulls him into a hug, “I’m so proud of you.”
He’s shocked that she’s saying these things, and its clear she has more confidence in him than he does. Aizawa had offered him daily training to get him onto the same level as the other Class 1-A students, and he’d be joining them the next semester, assuming everything went well. “It’s no guarantee.” He mumbles, wrapping his arms around her torso.
Shinsou felt Y/N swat his back as she pulled away slightly, much to his dismay, “you’re so talented! Of course, he’s gonna let you in.”
She sounded so sure, and Shinsou felt his heart swell with pride.
He moves to speak, only to be interrupted by a passerby, “L/N. Come on, quit hanging out with that freak.” Y/N recognized him, James, he’d bothered Shinsou before, and he’d tried to get Y/N to stop hanging out with Shinsou and been unsuccessful. “He’s just gonna ruin your chances at becoming a pro.”
Y/N pulls away slightly from Shinsou, her brows are furrowed as she moves to confront him, only for Shinsou to grab her arm, shaking his head. “Don’t.”
Turning to glare at the guy, Y/N scoffed, “is this because I rejected you?”
“He asked you out?” Shinsou asked, but Y/N gave him a look that said they’d discuss it later. She could remember the day vividly, he’d asked shortly after she returned from hanging out with Shinsou, telling her she could do so much better, and so much better meant him.
She disagreed. And now Y/N couldn’t help but feel bothered as their argument begins to draw attention from others within the cafeteria, she can see in the corner of her eye that Izuku has come to a stand. Though Iida is grasping his shoulder to try and prevent him from doing anything irrational, they all knew Y/N could stand on her own.
James scoffed at her words, “you probably rejected me because he made you.” The implications were dark, the idea that Shinsou had forced Y/N to befriend him and reject James, though he’d never used his quirk on her and swore he never would.
Shinsou found himself releasing Y/N’s arm, taking a step backwards as he sighed, only for her to grab his hand and yank him closer before taking his face in her hands and kissing him.
She was kissing him.
Oh.
Shinsou’s mind empties as Y/N pulls away, turning back to James as she says, “my boyfriend doesn’t need to make me do anything.” And the boy practically stomps off in frustration, grumbling about Shinsou’s stupid quirk or something of that sort. Not that either of them are paying attention as Y/n brings a hand to the back of her neck awkwardly, searching her mind for an explanation.
“Boyfriend?” His voice is soft, small, and he knows there are other people in the cafeteria but he can’t bring himself to care about their stares.
Y/N turns to him, and she feels her cheeks warm as she tries to avoid his eyes, “well. Only if you want to-”
“I want to.” Shinsou replies too quickly, his cheeks flushing.
Y/N nods, “cool.”
“Cool.”
Izuku can’t help but beam as he watches the interaction, hitting Iida’s arm repetitvely as as he exclaims, “does this mean I’ll be able to study his quirk more?”
Tsu just sighs, “this means we don’t have to listen to her pining anymore.”
TODOROKI SHOUTO
THIS ONE
probably the most relaxed about it, not flustered at all, you tried thoughh
your relationship isn’t really a secret, it’s just that neither of you are that into PDA.
there will be occasional cuddling on the common room couch of the dorms during movie night, but that’s seen as normal to the rest of Class 1-A. during dates, there will be hand holding, a kiss on the cheek, an arm around the shoulder, otherwise most of the intimacy is reserved for your rooms
this lack of PDA is why class 1-A was completely unaware that the two of you were dating,
though you hadn’t tried to hide it, you also hadn’t made it entirely public, you also lowkey thought everyone knew.
mostly because it was so blatantly obvious that shoto was in love with you, but the entire class thought he was unaware of his own feelings and you were just oblivious
oh how wrong they were
you come into class one day and you see shoto and you’re just like lol hi babe and you kiss him, he kisses back, LIKE IT IS THE MOST NORMAL THING
he’s temporarily caught off guard because like i said you two don’t really do PDA, but he digs it, 10/10 would kiss you again in front of everyone, mostly because after all of the CHAOS that this kiss causes, the other boys in the class stop blatantly flirting with you
speaking of chaos
the class erupts into PURE CHAOS
so much yelling and screaming, they are so confused, have fun explaining that one
shoto is equally confused as to why they are confused and you’re just laughing because you knew this would mess with their heads. he ends up getting a little flustered by all the sudden attention the two of you are getting, but maintains his apathetic attitude.
Shoto places his bag beside his desk before pulling his things out one by one to place them onto the desk along with the small cup of coffee. Shoto wasn’t really the coffee type himself, he preferred tea, Y/N on the other hand had an obsession if he was honest. Of course, he enabled this obsession, he liked being the one to bring a smile onto her face.
Yeah, he was whipped.
He could tell when Y/N entered the room because the atmosphere seemed to change entirely, she seemed to brighten everyone’s mood despite how early it was. Greeting their other classmates, she began to move towards him, seeing that he was holding a cup of coffee, Y/N raised a brow. “You drink coffee now?” She asked as she placed her things down.
Shaking his head, Shoto extended the hand with the cup of coffee towards him, “it’s for you.” He explained, small smile on his face.
The rest of their classmates watched the interaction, Kirishima punching Kaminari’s arm as he exclaimed, “so manly!”
Bakugou scoffed from beside the both of them, “if he was really manly then maybe he’d actually ask her out.” Crossing his arms, he averts his eyes from the two, finding the class’s obsession with their relationship a tad ridiculous. Though everyone seemed to be at least slightly invested in the potential outcome at this point.
“Whatever, Bakugo.” Mina says, “L/N has the prettiest boy in class wrapped around her finger- ugh! I want someone to love me like that.” She places her head in her hand, brows furrowing as she stares at the two. Y/N is smiling widely at Shoto, who returns her smile with one of his own.
And then Y/N kisses him. As though this is an everyday thing.
Mina practically jumps out her seat, and though Bakugo would never admit it, his mouth gaped open in shock as she cried out, “did you two just kiss?!”
Shoto’s cheeks are red as they pull away, though his face remains apathetic as he looks to the ground and Y/N replies, “can I not kiss my boyfriend?” She tilts her head in confusion, laughing slightly at the outburst and the clear shock in everyone’s faces.
“Boyfriend?” Hagaruke cried out. “Why didn’t you tell us?!”
Y/N’s brows furrows as she looks to the rest of the astonished class, “did you guys seriously not know? I thought we were obvious, I literally call him by his first name-”
“We thought that was because you two were madly in love with each other but neither could confess!” Momo exclaimed suddenly, her cheeks flaming red at her outburst as she slaps a hand over her mouth.
Mina simply nods in agreement, “exactly! But now he’s buying you coffee and-”
Shoto shakes his head in confusion, “I often buy her coffee, normally she finishes it before we get to class.” He looks to Y/N, a small frown on her face, “today she woke up too late for me to walk her to school so I couldn’t give it to her then-”
“You’re so manly, Todoroki!” Kirishima exclaims, though Shoto simply looks at him in confusion as he removes his hand from Y/N’s waist.
Shrugging, he takes a seat at his desk and Y/N speaks once more, “I just don’t understand how you guys didn’t know.” Standing beside him as he organizes his things while seated, Y/N runs a hand through his hair, and Shoto’s cheeks seemed to redden once more.
“You guys aren’t normally so touchy!” Uraraka has joined the conversation, shock clear in her features.
Shoto nods in agreement, “your behavior today is abnormal, Y/N.”
Now Y/N can feel her cheeks warm as she removes her hand and takes a seat t her desk, “you guys are weird.”
Izuku simply sighs, deflating almost as he watches the interaction and leans over towards Iida, “now I owe Kacchan money.”
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#ughh we were kinda warned it was possible we’d develop ptsd#at the time I was like no way Im free and so happy and just need to get through the grief cycle and then Im moving on without looking back#but. maybe Im far enough through grieving :s the upset and anger is going#i had a panic attack going into a specific room and had to rearrange the furniture so it didnt feel the same as back then#she’s been gone over two weeks but Ive started panicking whenever the phone rings#and recently I constantly get flashes of panic throughout the day bc I think Ive forgotten to do smth for her or Im late#or a memory will just pop up suddenly and now the situation isnt ongoing I can see it for how truly fucked up it is and feel sick#the funeral isnt until next week and i actually feel anxious about going bc now we’ve created some distance I dont wantto be near her again#hfff its a lot to take in. trying to grieve and process but also the massive life change#its hard when u just accepted and dealt with something and then suddenly its like ‘you went through THAT? are you ok??’ and its like uh..#and really starts to sink in#not 2 start but my dad was abusive too in different ways n then i had trouble with a partner and then nrly 8 years of practically being#prisoner in this situation and Im finding being entirely free of any negativity quite#idk almost scary? there’s just no one there in a role there always has been someone#i honestly feel like Ive been freed from a basement or something djhd..being in public spaces without smn there constantly humiliating and#dehumanising me is like an entire new world#Im still nd obvs so its not like I fit in suddenly but ive been going to stores and just walking around like :DDD!!!!#its kinda !!??!?!! skipping between so much good and dealing with coming out of so much bad#going from that to suddenly having complete freedom. knowing we can move homes. having a trip planned and maybe seeing the boys#idk where im going with this just aaaa..i was hoping to just be matter of fact about this and shut the bad memories off bc its ok now#I dont want to carry it around now its over but i guess its just smth that brain needs to do :s#I just wish the funeral hadnt been so delayed. but we explained the situation to the lady who’ll be doing the readings n she was#v supportive of making it comfortable for us so hopefully it wont be so bad#anyway back to suyeol..#tbh im even finding tao harder to enjoy now bc he just reminds me of being in that situation orz I wish my garbage brain hadnt ruined him#got me through at the time i guess#I hope i can at least find comfort in things now rather than like life or death depending on them zzz#its always been that way who knew id live this long lmao ive had pretty decent interests to keep me around
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