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#its just not a problem for me because i literally feel so normal when im high and like. good. like i just normally feel happy
craycraybluejay · 26 days
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yes i am an adult male who loves high school dramas this is because i literally never experienced normal coming of age drama like ever and am disconnected from the collective experience of having a relatable peer group forever hope that helps
#i JUST want to experience high school#without like. my whole shitty life thing having gone on#i want to go to high school and have stupid drama and sexuality crises and worries about grades#not... That#i never had that im never going to have that#can i get (one) permission to go a little crazy if i survive into a university#fuck everyone befriend and be-enemy everyone get all up in peoples stupid mind numbingly low stakes drama#i want that sweet golden experience where the worst thing ill ever fear is annoying my classmates#or accidentally spilling something on someone at a dance#i deserve it i deserve to have had a childhood and a young adulthood and a life#i deserve to have dealt with unserious issues to prepare me for bigger ones#rather than serious danger that leaves me permanently severed from normal people and life#and makes me incapable of reacting proportionally or finding it in me to care about less serious problems#like yes it sucks your mom is going to miss college graduation#but i thank my lucky stars that you are not dying or being abused or starved or beaten or exploited#i literally dont know how to take things seriously a lot of the time like im not able to even if i try#because to me the mildest real problem is someone purposefully isolating you and ruining your health#the MILDEST#i try to care ab simple stuff i really do i just CANT#and it sucks so much trying to be a good friend and kind feeling like i cant do enough#the loud thought 'i wish that hapoened to me/i wish i worried about that/i wish the people i love only had that as a problem'#i get so envious. like thank fucking god your parents divorced like normal adults when it should be over#thank fucking god that 'friend' cut you off when they were actively insulting you and betraying your trust#thank the fucking universe that shitty partner dumped you before you fkn hurt yourself over them#yk?#and its a 'mean/cold' way to think about it but i just dont have the capacity to think or feel the little picture#i can imagine my friends subjected to such horror even tho i dont want to
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buppypuppy · 5 months
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#vent post essay ahead lol#having complexes about talking about your emotions is literally the fucking devil . its miserable. it sucks so bad.#the aamount of damage that is caused to someone by like#i mean im talking abou t me here obviously.#being the person whose like. overall ultimately tends not to feel horrible as often is like.#it's nice not feeling bad emotionally all the time but also it's like. i develop this complex about being like able to help.#i don't feel bad anywhere near as often as my friends so i can help them out and listen to them vent i can have the mental room to#like listen to them talk about their problems. yeah. but it makes me feel like. well this is my job now so i shouldn't fucking talk about m#i shouldnt vent when i feel bad because that's not what i'm known for. plus my friends already all feel worse than me more often than me. s#i don't want to dump any more on their plate than they have to deal with. i don't want to burden them anymore than i have to. and like it's#it's hard. i hate fucking talking about it and it's made so much worse when its like people i love . always been a fucking problem becaus#i just feel fucking horrible admitting that i feel bad i hate that so much. i don't want to like turn away people who care about me but li#i feel like if i tell them what's wrong with me i'll like do it anyways. i feel like i come off as super normal and happy go lucky and like#ostensibly fine. so when i admit this shit its like. oops the facade is cracking!!!!!! uh oh uh oh you can't help people so you feel bad!!!#because your fucking npd has made you feel self centered in a way that means you want to help people or some shit i dont fucking know#and so when i feel bad or get mad over something unreasonable it's like. well i hope i fucking keel over and die or something i dont like .#i don't want people seeing me like this or whatever. and my stupid fucking personality disorder just ruins every god damn thing its so bad.#my past experiences giving me complexes that lead to me feeling fucking left out over like small stupid stuff but god the worst part is lik#my brain categorizing something as being ''My Thing'' so somebody else talks about liking my thing AFTER my brain has designated it mine#makes alarm bells go off and feel like theyre fucking. i don't know encroaaching on my turf or what the fuck ever? it SUCKS ASS#it makes me feel HORRIBLE . and it's like i'm not gonna fucking bring it up because i don't wnt to be like a dick but also it's like well.#i feel fucking miserable about this but it's just like mean and unnecessary and cruel to like stifle people's fucking fun because of my dum#fuckin complexes. it's fucking constant. like oh look at you girl you feel fucking left out because you never get characters who really gri#you mentally and so now you have one but oops! someone else talked about them and now you're seeing red! you like this person though#so you're gonna feel fucking MISERABLE about this . you're gonna feel HORRIBLE because of this. and there's nothing you can fucking do#and it controls my goddamn life and i HATE IT i fucking HATE IT i wish i knew how to fix it. ghghrgurghrughruhg i want to fucking explode#and then you feel bad about feeling bad because you are fucking sisyphus. you're sisyphus. and your own anger is your boulder. you ingrate.#i hate this. i just wanted to have a good day.#jane mary cry one tear
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faultsofyouth · 4 months
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Gotta keep the no weed posts to a minimum lest people think it's actually a good thing I'm smoking less
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waywardsalt · 9 months
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dungeons in linear loz games made you feel stupid because you’d sometimes be wandering without a clue until stumbling over a little detail you’d overlooked; dungeons in totk make you feel stupid because they hardly seem to trust that you have any more than very basic problem-solving skills
#hi hi hi im still being annoying abt this game#when i have the time im going to give all of my og totk salt posts their own dedicated tag#bitching abt totk#thats the tag ive decided#ill get murdered if i put this in a normal tag#i just. good lord this game managed to piss me off on so many levels#as an enjoyer of games as a zelda fan as a writer as someone who likes a bit of a challenge as a musician with the weird leitmotif stuff#i UNDERSTAND that some people like the totk dungeons BECAUSE theyre easier and this post is not for them#this post is for the bitches who like the experience of being in a dungeon for over an hour#and like even with dungeons its not like a skill roadblock you just gotta fuck around enough until smth clicks#skill roadblocks r kinda annoying in games thats why i typically have month breaks between elden ring play sessions#they just. literally hand you what you need in totk and it usually amounts to ‘use ultrahand’#the new abilities are good for gameplay and world exploration and shit for actual puzzles#totk salt#that would be a good salty (me) totk hate tag but thats a tag other ppl use and would not be exclusive to my shit#i would walk into a dungeon room in totk and not have to spend more than 3 minutes clearing it and then getting a 5th/4th of the objective#i dont feel good abt solving a problem when i dont actually get to think for myself abt how to solve it#and the key to the ‘puzzle’ is the only other interact-able thing in the room#salty talks
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strwbrymlkshake · 2 years
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so upset and disgusted my stomach hurty </3
#mine#💿#im not upset bc of him im upset bc of something else but i wanna rant abt him anyways#he isnt good at holding conversations w me but tried to cheer me up which is nice. an attempt was made#im being less of a weirdo freak around him and distancing more ?? which is good i suppose#i love yandere culture and everything but i only want a yandere relationship thats not based on exploiting weaknesses#like a thing where each partner consents to whatever non traditional act etc. none of this weird stuff#the thing im upset about is sort of regarding my views abt it but not a ref to anything on here ugugugghrg#i dont understand why thered be people who want to see the light of their life in pain and hurting. its about worship and adoration#and treating your love like the object nearest to your heart. like an extension of you. not fucking abusing them#not abusing those who cant do anything for themselves. who cant fight back. who dont have the slightest idea#dont drag people into your sick fantasy just because it gets you off usdhwkffjdkgke im seething rn#anyway i tagged this abt my cd guy so i will continue to talk abt him. when he was messaging me i was very happy#i was so happy i could make him laugh and his happiness made me happy<3 but like literally i cant trust anyone anymore#i know one person cant take care of all my problems but i feel like they could contribute a little more. instead of ignoring me#idk maybe im being weird and everyone acknowledges me a normal amount.. i have irreversible damage in my brain<3#im being good about not obsessing. having other interests and goals. having a LIFE on my own without craving him everyday#i dont know if im doing it purposefully though or im just afraid. i know i am afraid but is that the only reason? i really am trying#i feel so heartbroken the way i felt more love when a cashier was being nicer to me than almost any of my friends#im like oh ill get doxxed writing that. but i dont think anyone is paying enough attention or cares enough to find me out anyway.#i will settle for second best even if it means they simply regard me positively :( i want to be liked so so badly. just for who i am#not anything like talents or appearance. just me. why doesnt anyone desire me for who i am? maybe its because who i am isnt the best yet#but i want to be loved even if im not the greatest and i dont think thats too much to ask. i want to be loved the way all humans love#but there isnt much of that any more. or if there is they sure have a funny way of showing it. im not supposed to rely on people for things#like this. but i cant just keep telling MYSELF i accept me. that i love me. because i know this already. im fine with me. but no one else#is. ive submitted to the ordeal of being known. to being vulnerable. to pouring my heart out. but everyone who touches it is filthy.#ive fixed myself to the best of my ability yet why am i not being taken notice of. i make myself look nice everyday. what does it take#its so sickening that its hard to find a kind person in the world. you ignore me. i was going to go great lengths to get you a present too#i was gna try so hard but its so easy for you to not try at all. oh well i cant cntrol others i can only sit being tormented by thr actions#i cant work hard enough to make you care about persevering. to not be indifferent. to not be boring. to not be neglectful
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lovphobic · 11 months
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damn are u me bc SAME (unfortunately)) and it's kinda eating me alive bc one of them has this super awesome bf that really cares about her and is putting in the effort to show it and yeah I'm happy for her bc she deserves the world but also I sometimes think about how I've always been alone and haven't even kissed yet and I'm like. am i not pretty or interesting enough for someone to put effort in?? and i feel bad about feeling envious lol but it's ok
FORREAAAALLLLL like god i love my friends i am happy for them but after having two like supremely toxic relationships its just like. well when will it be my fucking turn huh. and i FEEL u on the kiss thing bc neither have i <3 and ive definitely been pitied for it too.. YAY.
but like. ok maybe this is toxic maybe not but. i think being envious is ok? just as long as its kept in check. like you dont Ruin your friendship over the envy. is that toxic am i cancelled.
#like on one hand i am SOOOOOOOOO sick of seeing u guys be happy but also like. i keep that shit inside i dont take it out on anyone bc its#immature and childish and wrong. but my feelings are something i cant control yk? and on the other hand its like FUUUUUUUUCK YES I AM SO#HAPPY THAT U ARE HAPPY YESSSSSSSS TELL ME EVERYTHING!! and its just a very weird war for me to be waging. by myself. in my mind palace#like. my second gf wasnt great to me. my recent ex was DEFINITELY not good to me. the weird fling i had w a guy last year when i had an#identity crisis left me feeling used (if u know. well. u know.) so its like. am i just not fucking deserving ? am i not deserving of#something nice that feels like coming home? that reminds me i didnt even get to have closure on my last crush bc it was fucking spearheaded#by my fucking ex and well THEYRE still friends go fucking figure fuck you guys#like the last time i truly felt loved was back in 2019. im so serious. like. i know im loved platonically sure. thats great and i love you#guys too. but this cant sustain me. im getting lonely and im getting bitter and i dont have anyone to blame. like. not even myself. which#SUCKS. it SO SUCKS. like . i dont know. i want something real before i die. i dont have a lifespan like you guys. my condition will#literally probably kill me. and like. im gonna die not knowing true love. thats where im at. thats kinda what im reminded of seeing all my#friends this happy. because they live normal lives. i dont even feel like i Deserve love but i want it so bad#did you know my ex when we like first started dating was like what am i gonna do when you die. what would i tell the kids. like you just#fucking say that to someone you love? you make the fact that their disability will likely kill them into a problem YOU have to face?#do you see what i mean. i just want to feel wanted. without conditions#snail mail#lol i made myself cry. im so hot hot girl summer (chokes)
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roses-in-rain · 2 years
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looks at you. HAVE YOU CONSIDERED PRAYING TO THE ABUSE VICTIM BIBLE (PERSONA 5) TODAY?
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lightfeltmemories · 5 months
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episode one: phantom troupe and romance; headcanons from least toxic, to most toxic
characters include: chrollo, machi, pakunoda, shizuku, uvogin, shalnark, feitan, phinks, bonolenov, kortopi, hisoka, illumi, nobunaga, franklin. (not in order)
tw's: nsfw but nothing explicit, mentions of non-con, spoilers for the deaths of pakunoda, shalnark, kortopi and uvogin, toxic relationships, lovebombing, mentions of torture (not on reader), mentions of cheating, mentions of reader's death,
notes: a completely self indulgent post, you can probably tell who im biased towards by how long certain sections are.
because this contains mentions of nsfw, do not interact if you are under 18, you will be blocked if you do !! also, do not leave negative comments please, they will be deleted :)
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pakunoda
out of everyone, guaranteed, she'll be the best partner out of everyone else, you might even end up shocked that she's apart of the troupe if it ever comes to you finding out.
she's a darling, spoils and cares for you like anyone else, a great listener and partakes in your interests in hobbies, its (almost) like a fairytale by how the relationship is, the troupe knows you but you don't know them! and she wants to keep it that way, of course still she's a murderer, so it would break her if you were to have found out about everything, she vowed to never let you know or even have you close to knowing about what she does, but you just can't help but wonder what she's doing when she's away for long periods of time.
until it comes to her death.
now, you eventually find out that she died from a close friend of hers, but he knows paku doesn't want you to know about the troupe, so, he's a bit vague, and a bit creepy.
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nobunaga
personally out of everyone else, i feel like nobunaga would be other most normal when it comes to relationships, but then again, he's an enigma, he doesn't strike me as the type to be the best boyfriend literally ever or very very toxic, i feel like out of everyone else, if you're looking for someone to be in a semi normal relationship with, nobunaga is your best shot, but of course, he's a part of the phantom troupe, and any member apart of it isn't exactly the best partner by default.
he's still a murder and thief, like all members i believe that he would definitely steal things that remind him of you, he'd most definitely kill for you.
unlike someone like feitan or machi, he doesn't exactly have a problem with being vulnerable when you get to know him, he'll tell you about himself, and of course, because he's a criminal he can't exactly tell you what he does for a living, but can't bring himself to lie about it either, he's just hoping that one day, if you know, you won't leave or judge him for it, his childhood isn't exactly all sunshines and lolipops, y'know?
he'll love you from the ends of the earth, but he definitely won't let you walk all over him, quick to put your in your place and won't allow you to manipulate him, he won't lie to you (about trivial things, at least) so why should you? (who knows, maybe you're apart of a criminal organization and is pretty much a wanted criminal yourself :P)
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bonolenov
similar to nobunaga i think if you want something that's somewhat normal, bonolenov is also a nice choice! (100% not putting him up so high because we don't really know that much about him it's totally because he would be a decent partner! honest!)
for one, you would definitely be introduced to usual romantic gestures and advances that come from his tribe, he'll tell you all about how things work with him, he'll do dances he learned when they were still here for you to show how much he adores you, and dresses you in garments that resemble such from his tribe, it's pretty cute, honestly!
now, what concerns him a bit is.. how you'll react without his bandages, he's not exactly sexy like chrollo but (to me, TO MEEEEEE) he's not the ugliest thing in the world! he just hopes that eventually if you see him in his true form, you don't scream and run away at the sight of him, its okay if you do! ..... kind of.
and if you don't, oh you'll mean so much to him!
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kortopi
now, here's another one we don't know much about! but i'll try my best either way (i just want to contribute to the lack of attention him and bono get in these spaces.) he's another somewhat normal one, he also doesn't strike me as the type to be the absolute worst, but still is apart of a troupe of murderers and thieves.
similar to everyone else, he'll steal and kill for you (idk if this guy even has a body count but lets pretend he does.) and is a lot more open to being vulnerable than some other members.
now, nine times out of ten you'll be taller than him because this guy is even shorter than feitan, so, he'll definitely be wearing your t-shirts and hoodies, and he ain't complaining about it!
and eventually, he dies, now, honestly, something told you that kortopi seemed... like the odd one out when it came to the troupe, he doesn't seem like the type to be apart of... that! you better hope that hisoka doesn't care about you, or things are gonna turn ugly faster than you can blink.
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uvogin
he's big (as hell), but he's sweeter (you know why they're in bold italics) than the others twice his size.
physically the strongest, you're rather lucky to have him has your partner, if someone won't stop messing with you, they're dead within a millisecond, or at least scared off since you know.. he isn't exactly built like the average guy and having someone that's eight foot fucking two walking up on you not really excited to see you is quite terrifying, depending on his mood they'll sometimes get away.... sometimes.
enough of that, how is it like when it's just the two of you? sitting on the couch or laying in bed watching movies together, his arm around you, it's basically a pillow! a hard ass pillow at that.
not the most vulnerable, he's not some weird incel who see's women as sex toys or anything, he's decently capable of being in a normal relationship, you won't see each other often sadly, but when you do, he'll pay 95% of his attention towards you, he'll even let you know straight up that he won't know when he'll get back, but he will! ... until he doesn't..
ah yes, his death at the hands of kurapika, how will you react? hell, how would kurapika react to your existence? something tells me that kurapika might kill you too, send you right off with him, or, in a rather strange twist of events, he might try to fuck you and take you to the other side, not in the way of barging into your house and straight up non con, nah, more like a get to know you then get in your pants type of way, uvo won't be there to protect you now would he? of course the latter is highly unlikely, but to be honest it's kind of fun to think about.
and now that you think of it... you don't even know what uvo was doing or where he was going, you choose how you want to react to how you found out about his troupe business.
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shizuku
another woman! she's similar to another person right below her! she looks cute, but she's anything but!...... sort of.
she's not the best or worst partner, she's pretty normal, a bit distant but it's not something you can't manage, maybe she just needs some space and you're overwhelming her, but something that really gets to you is her forgetfulness.
at first, she'll forget things such as your birthday or your anniversary, but going further into the relationship, she becomes less and less forgetful (she might even remember things that you don't even remember.)
what exactly do you guys do together? well, she does try to partake in your interests, and does try to get things you like!
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franklin
he's similar to uvo, he's big, he's actually nicer than he appears.
what makes him so low is.. well to be honest i don't know, i don't feel like he could be high up but not so low, so, this is the perfect spot for him.
for one he does have a bit of an anger problem, not as bad as phinks, but he doesn't mind a slight argument, good thing he wont assault you, and is quick to make up for the argument.
i don't know how to write him, so, please forgive me for how small this passage is. :(
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shalnark
we're starting to get into uh... strange territory, he looks kind, and seems normal, but he's anything but that, he's not the most toxic but he also isn't the most caring and understanding either, similar to nobunaga he's kind of an enigma.
he's a love bomber and very good at manipulating, definitely takes advantage of his rather cute looks, he'll figure out what you're insecure about and compliment those things specifically, i do think he is capable of loving someone genuinely, but he sometimes does things without realizing that they aren't really normal, maybe he's getting his troupe personality mixed up with the one he has with you.
he does come off as sweet at first, brings you flowers and takes you on some rather expensive dates (an uncanny feeling creeps up on you about how the waiters act, but you don't pay much attention to it.) and sometimes he's more distant and a little bit aloof, you take this as him needing his space.
he's not abusive, but he isn't the absolute best partner, there's definitely better out there.
his death doesn't hit you as hard as the others but it was still devastating, you best hope hisoka doesn't come for you, and if he does, you hope he swiftly kills you, because you really don't want this murder clown to take an interest to you.
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phinks
phinks is another one 'that's kind of odd to me, i don't want to judge a book by its cover and say "yeah he's a piece of shit!!" but again, he's a lot better in comparison to anyone below.
he's similar to shalnark in quite a few ways, one, he does things that kind of makes you think he's a bit of an odd ball, he's intimidating to look at and is the second strongest physically in the troupe, so you're lucky to have someone like him if you're looking for protection.
i don't see him as the type to take you out to fancy restaurants and bring you flowers, stuff like that is a bit too sappy for him, he shows other ways like giving you thinks you like or taking you to like carnivals or other fun events.
his main problem is his anger issues, he won't physically harm you especially if you don't use nen, but he's not above arguing with or yelling at you, he doesn't do it often, but he might call you an idiot or a bitch if you take him to that point.
the relationship is somewhat normal besides that.
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chrollo
chrollo is weird, some say he's loving, caring, blah blah blah while some might say he's the exact opposite.
for one he is charming, he's a relatively good looking man, he's intelligent, and is looking for someone who's also intelligent.
i feel like chrollo definitely has a type, he likes people who are elegant, he wants someone that'll make him look good while he's in public, he doesn't care much for how people view the relationship outside of that, he also looks for someone with a personality he doesn't want someone who looks good yes, but is boring to be around, someone he can have a deep conversation with and talk about his interests with.
for one, you will not know about the troupe's existence, until he is 100% ready to tell you, which will definitely take a while, but he's confident that the troupe and himself will protect you from anyone who tries to avenge.
now, what makes him so low on this list? well, he's quite manipulative, a gaslighter, too, what do you mean you saw me with another woman? it's all for business, i'm just trying to steal her nen ability.
he does want to be a good partner, but this relationship is kind of a "too good to be true" type, something is happening behind closed doors and the thought is too persistent to ignore.
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illumi
this guy is... strange, for one, his beady ass eyes make him look like a bug (affectionately), and section.. his very warped perception of what love even is.
i agree with the fandom that he has a breeding kink no doubt, his intention on dating is marriage, and you will bear his children, no ifs, ands or buts.
you'll meet his family but you'll never meet the troupe, he doesn't want you getting involved in fighting (he might have someone teach you some basic self protection) because he doesn't want you to die, that'll fuck with him... kind of, you're basically trapped in the mansion.
his overprotection is toxic on its own, you don't have that much freedom, you can't go shopping unless he's with you (or if he can't be there, one of his servants will accompany you), you're never truly alone unless he's away, and when he's here, things are no better, he's distant and cold, there's not much to talk about with him, sure, he loves you, but doesn't know how to express it much.
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machi
one out of three toxic ass individuals, one of them consists of machi.
lets start off with the fact that she's cold hearted, as hell, if you cry in front of her she'll look at you like you're crazy, if she's really in that mood she'll tell you that you look stupid and you need to suck it up.
not good with physical touch or romance, who knows how the two of you managed to continue the relationship, she does leave flowers for you but won't tell you that they're from her, won't admit that she's the one who got them for you.
i feel like similar to a certain clown, she won't care much for you if you aren't either powerful or capable of protecting yourself in some way.
but all she's really doing is putting up barriers, she's actually caring in her own weird way, she'll still be there for you, patch up your wounds if you managed to get cut or stabbed and would probably mourn your death.
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hisoka
were getting lower, and a certain sadist who loves torture is worse, but somehow, hisoka is slightly better than him in some way or another.
for one, hisoka probably won't be that interested in you if you aren't powerful, it would be worse if you were a regular civilian, he'll take that as an opportunity to take advantage of you sexually, physically, psychologically and mentally, and the relationship will be literal hell..
but, lets say you are pretty powerful, dare i say a troupe member yourself, he won't be as interested in fighting you as much as he would chrollo, but he would be interested in... other ways.
how you managed to get into a relationship with this freak is unclear, but you two one day just.. hooked up, and it all goes downhill from here.
he has no problem killing you if he gets tired of you, he already killed two and plans on killing the rest of the spiders, why not kill another? especially you? or, in an alternate scenario where he does manage to kill off all the spider, you're the only one who's left, this can go two ways, one, he can fuck you one last time then kill you, or, he takes you with him! if you managed to have a lasting impression on him, that is.
outside of sex, he just isn't a good partner, he's probably the only one on this list that's probably willing to cheat on you (don't you dare get back at him, both you and your lover will die) he's manipulative as hell, he doesn't necessarily care about how you feel and he'll provoke you just to get a reaction out of you.
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feitan
and last but not least, feitan, oh boy, good luck to you for managing to have this man attracted to you. (im a feitan girlie, so this one might be a big longer than the rest)
for one, he'll hate your rotten guts for making him feel this way, for making him feel so weak, so emotional... he might even contemplate on killing you, but when that time comes he can't bring himself to do it.
i don't want to say yandere is his default since he doesn't really know how to properly love, because i do think he has some potential, but it does make sense for him, because there has to be something about you that makes you interested in him, maybe you're his polar opposite? maybe you're also a sadist?
he's not the most romantic partner, he doesn't want to come off as vulnerable, or sappy, so, what considers as a date to him? he's the type to probably take you to a cemetery at night as a form of a date.
he will not allow the troupe to know you or you to know them, for one he's going to be teased from hell and back for finally managing to pull someone and second while it appears that he doesn't care for you much, him protecting you from them is his way of showing you that he cares.
he can't find himself being vulnerable, he might teach you his language if you're up for it, and he might bring you some things he knows you like, but thats kind of it, also he won't force you to see him torture people.. unless you betray him in a way.
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binniebakery · 3 months
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lights off
College AU Bestfriend!Beomgyu x Gn!Reader .. not exactly fluff! kinda suggestive? ♡ Warnings: thunder? rain? ig being in the dark? my first time writing kissing .. my first time actually writing ANYTHING so it might be bad im so sorry guys ♡ A/N: this is my first little fic (if you could call it that)! i literally hate it but i think i got the point across LOLL regardless i hope someone will enjoy please lmk what you think <3 lowercase intended + not proofread ~
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7:32 pm. sighing softly, you placed your phone that was softly playing your favorite tunes back down on the small table over your lap. you tapped your pencil on the table in frustration as you once again for the fifth time readjusted your legs on the bed of your best friend's bedroom. time was going by excruciatingly slow and it didnt help that this math problem was taking you a million years to solve. the sun had already set outside and heading back to your dorm seemed less favorable by the minute. hearing a soft shuffle from the other side of the room you looked up at your best friend. rain began to patter outside. looks like you'll be staying for longer than you intended. beomgyu, who had his deep-colored headphones on was moving his head to the music as he wrote down notes from his study guide. his hair softly wrapped around his features most attractively. you began to mentally trace the lines of his nose, his eyes… his lips.. the dim lighting of the room adding more charm to his aura. "y/n..? are you okay? i could feel you burning holes into my head." beomgyu said as he shook off his headphones to fully put his attention was on you. snapped out of your daze, you mentally kicked yourself as you felt embarrassment creep onto your cheeks. how long had you been staring at him for..? "sorry gyu. if i was staring i didnt mean to" you softly laughed, trying to seem nonchalant and cool about the situation. beomgyu, seeing your embarrassment, chuckled at your reaction. "youre okay, i know you look at me because im cute" he grinned and you rolled your eyes. "oh shut up! you know i was daydreaming. i cant focus on this assignment anyways, its too hard. i think im gonna just finish it tomorrow." you smiled as you threw a pillow at him. he was always cheeky when he had the opportunity. anything to see you react. "daydreaming? so you do think im cute?" he grinned wider after recovering from your pillow attack. you huffed and placed the table that was on your lap onto the ground. "you know youre so-.. ugh and what if i do think you're cute?! what would you even do about it, huh?" you retaliated as you sat on the edge of his bed, now fully facing him. you faked a pout as you were feeling a bit bolder than usual today. your homework giving you enough pent-up rage to have the energy to give in to his bickering.
"okay well i dont know how much truth there is to that but if you really meant that id probably kiss you." your eyes widened at his response. you see beomgyu's face turn into an unreadable expression. he hadnt realized you were only half joking and fully meant the compliment, but it was too late and by the time he caught wind that you were actually flustered he felt his stomach flip. even he was shocked by his own words. he slipped. had he said too much? after a few seconds of silence that felt like minutes. the rain outside seemed to get louder. his eyes finally met yours and you looked away. you felt your heart pounding at the thought of you saying too much. both of you overthinking the situation and awkwardness that you both never have had before taking place. you and beomgyu have never had an awkward moment like this. normally you both laugh things off but this time felt different. "you trust me right?" his voice sounded sincere. this tone was rare for you to hear from him but you knew immediately he was being genuine with his question. "h- huh? yeah of course.. why?" you responded. "okay well.." you noticed beomgyu was now fiddling with his headphones, it seemed like he was turning all the gears in his head to get out what he wanted to say. "y/n.. theres a chance you may have not been telling the truth but if you were- look regardless if you meant it, i meant what i said." you could feel your stomach turning. he hardly flirted with you but when he did it always felt different from his usual teasing. you never said anything though, in fear of ruining your friendship. yet you always thought about what it would be like if he also returned the feelings you felt.
the room's atmosphere seemed to change. suddenly you were both hyper-aware of his neon led light being the only source of light aside from his computer. your playlist had stopped and the silence felt unbearable. in one swift move, he stood up, and turned off the led light on his wall.
the room was a lot darker now, his computer screen's light being the only way of telling you what he was going to do next. you watched as he plopped down next to you. he was so close that you could see the slight tinge of pink on his ears. your senses began to be filled with the light scent of his cologne. "i.. look- the only way i can say or do this is if the lights are off- im not trying to be weird its just you make me so nervous.. i cant look at you." he mumbled as he looked at your hands resting on your lap. it was so dark and both your hearts were racing. "gyu.. " was all you could muster with his hands now softly on yours.
"can i…" beomgyu began as he leaned in closer, only centimeters away from your face. his eyes staring intently into yours. he had this look of pure admiration, nervousness and love. it was all too surreal. realizing what he was asking, you silently nodded as you stared at his lips. he pressed his forehead on yours, the thick tension in the air causing your body to tingle in anticipation. as you felt his hair softly tickle your features from him leaning in, your lips connected. he kissed you oh so softly as he held your cheek gently. your hands, as if moving on their own, were softly placed on his arms. his lips softly moving along your own. he was patient. it felt as if he was waiting for you to respond, unsure if what he was doing was okay with you. you moved your head to the side slightly to deepen the kiss, causing him to sigh. it was all he needed to know you felt the same. his hands moved to your waist as you settled your fingers into his long hair. softly pushing him towards you to intensify the kiss. all that could be heard was the rain outside aside from the soft exchange of sighs and hands roaming. "ive liked you for so long.. you have no idea.." he began between kisses. it was all passionate, slow, and tender as if he was handling you like glass. his hands pulled your waist impossibly closer to his. he separated first, leaving you craving for more. "trust me, i liked you so much i was so scared you didnt feel the same way despite you teasing me the way you did." you chuckled as you pecked his cheek. "you drive me insane.." he softly spoke. "y/n, every time i tried to say something.. my brain just went to mush.. its so bad i swear. i could only be this confident with the lights off.." beomgyu laughed as his eyes began to trail your facial features. he was admiring every curve and feature, and at that point, both your faces were impossibly red. "gyu.. can you just.. kiss me again..?" your voice came out hardly a whisper. "i like you so much i feel like im going insane from the way you just confessed." he smiled fondly at your words and nodded, leaning in once again. as soon as your lips touched you could both practically feel the electricity pouring through your bodies. as if on cue, thunder struck the moment you connected again. your arms wrapped impossibly tight around him, slightly tugging and playing with his hair. his arms remained at your waist, slightly circling over the shirt you wore. you could feel the warmth of his fingers through the fabric.
his tongue slightly swiped along your lips for permission, and you parted your lips in response. having his tongue explore your mouth had your brain going numb. time felt like it had stopped, with just the rain as your only witness to the quiet whispers and confessions that only you two could hear. when you both finally were running out of breath, you separated with beomgyu looking into your eyes. you stared back, lips equally as glossy as his. "are you.. going back to your dorm yet?" thunder struck once again, as if responding to his question. you smiled. "its raining a little too hard dont you think?" beomgyu chuckled, realizing how silly his question was. "yeah. youre right, i think you should stay." you bit your lip as you pulled off each other, both of you immediately missing the warmth. beomgyu shook his head fixing his now fluffed hair thanks to you as he ran his fingers through. he then stood up to turn the led light he had turned off previously back on. "so.. how about we watch a movie?" he spoke as the light clicked. you could almost burst into laughter from the question given the events that just happened a minute prior. give it to choi beomgyu, your best friend, to turn a situation less awkward by simply being his charismatic self. the personality you fell for since day one of knowing him.
"sure gyu, but.." you trailed off, shy about what you were about to say next. honestly, could this get any more awkward? "yeah?" he turned to you and tilted his head in that attractive way he does. "leave the lights off." you looked at him with a shy smile. he flushed at your words. and for the last time again, lightning struck. "yeah.. lights off" he replied, led light clicking once again.
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aothotties · 6 months
Text
How they help you get over someone
| Eren | Armin | Reiner | Jean|
Word count: 1016
Warnings: Levi is in his 30s, car sex, mating press, pet names (mama), squirting, multiple orgasms, unprotected sex.
“But i just feel so dumb, im literally so stupid” you huffed to your gym buddy, Levi as you spotted him.
He finished his set then sat up and turned towards you 
“Y/N, you're so young. You're going to make mistakes plus you're a girl. No ones mad at you for believing what he said to you and having sex with him” he said plainly 
You always vented to Levi when you were upset and he always found a way to give you great advice and help you through everything. Him being older made it easier to trust him because you felt like he was grown grown and had it all together
“I'm mad at myself. I feel like I'm too old to still fall for the same bullshit I fell for in highschool. Were you like me at my age?” you stated as tears threatened to spill from your eyes
“ I was worse” , he responded, “don't feel bad about it. Its a normal thing for you to be upset that he fucked you then never spoke to you again, youre not the problem. Any woman, no matter what age, would be upset about that. I mean there's some succubuses out there that just smash everyone and don't feel a thing, but most women aren't like that”
You couldn't lie, levi always reassured you and made you feel better about making regular human choices and never allowed you to beat yourself up for making mistakes
You both finished your workout and left the gym. He walked out next to you and made sure you were safe in the parking lot because it was late at night. You stopped at the car and he pulled you into a hug
“You'll be alright, mama. Don't be so hard on yourself” he said and you buried your face in his chest and began to cry 
Even though his words made you feel better you were still sad. He rubbed your back and let you get it all out and refused to let go until you finished crying
You pulled away and wiped your tears on your shirt
“Thank you, i really appreciate you, Levi” you said to him once you composed yourself
“Dont worry about it, i'm always here if you need me” he responded.
You stared up at him completely enamored. You had the strongest feelings for him and had them for a while. You tried sleeping with that other guy thinking it would help you get over him but it clearly didn't work. You just ended up sad and crying in his arms which strengthened your feelings. You were convinced Levi didn't feel the same and you were too sacred to say anything in fear that it would ruin the friendship you have
“Aye aren't you glad you asked me to be your gym partner”, he said trying to change the subject
“yeah , i guess” you laughed as you responded 
“You guess? You know you wanted to be like me, that's why you approached me and asked for my help” he nudged you a little bit as he teased 
“That definitely not the reason i approached you but yeah let's go with that” you told on yourself before you even had the chance to realize it
He looked down at you and smirked as he nodded, “ yeah i know”
He confirmed in that moment that he knew exactly how you felt about him and apparently he felt the same because he grabbed you by your wrist and pulled you towards his car
Levi drove a nice white tesla and you had been dying to see the inside 
He had you in the back seat folded completely in half as he pressed his weight onto you 
His dick was reaching so far inside you that your mind went blank. All you could do was moan his name while he fucked you at a steady pace.
Sweat rolled down his abs as he was sliding in and out of your dripping wet pussy. He was mesmerized by the way you were sucking him in. He was also taken aback at how good your body looked folded under him.
Sometimes at the gym he would make slick comments about your ass but you never realized it was his way of telling you he felt the same.
“Fuck Levi, r-right there. Im gonna cum baby” you whined as you grabbed his biceps 
His pace didn't change and he continued to fuck you all the way to your peak
“Mmhmm mama, cum for me” he said as he watched your face contort in pleasure
Your high flooded over you and you came hard all over his thick cock. You felt bad that you squirted on his perfectly clean seats but he couldn't care less. He wanted to see you cum for him over and over again and didn't care about what happened to his car.
He never let up and kept going until you came for him multiple times. Each time you came a mantra of praises left his lips. 
His pace became more erratic as he came close to his climax. You could feel his dick throbbing inside you as he was about to cum
“ gonna cum inside you mama, f-fill you up real good” he stated between deep grunts
He slammed into you hard one last time then you felt as his hot thick cum spilled inside you. He slid out and watched as it pooled out of you but he quickly pushed it back in with his fingers.
You both threw your clothes on and you stepped out of his car and wobbled as you tried to stand up straight. He laughed at you and shook his head. He put his arm around you and walked you to your car 
He leaned down and pressed a kiss on your forehead 
“Best cardio i've ever done” he stated as he opened the door for you 
You hopped in your car and deleted the other guy's number knowing damn well he did not match up to Levi in any way.
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catscidr · 4 months
Note
Imagine Yandere Dottore x puppet like reader 🤭
i got carried away (again) im sorry lmaogsnfs(ɾ⚈▿⚈)ɹ this isnt as yandere as u would expect it to be for a dottore post bc i love me some good slow burn and character development but its fine its still dottore ⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝ cw: dottore tinkers with reader's inner stuff (literally), he gets weird about it includes: gn!reader, dottore, pantalone and dottore's clones mentionned for like a second wc: 1,5k
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You and Dottore had a simple routine; once a week, he would fix you up from whatever had happened to your body and mechanical system from adventuring in the past seven days and, in exchange, you would let him look and poke around your intricate mechanisms so he could learn more about machines and artificial life in Teyvat. He was, first and foremost, a scholar after all. 
However, he’s been getting a little more handsy and has seemed almost... worried the last two times you came back from your trips. 
...Worried in his own way, of course. 
The doctor wasn’t afraid to make you uncomfortable and, when he found a particularly harmful anomaly in your body, he could be even more insufferable. Nothing that you couldn’t handle- being mostly made up of elemental energy and cables gave you a pretty resistant body- so his change in attitude only irritated you more than it hurt. His hands, usually covered by surgical gloves, would lack the latex material to move aside your plates, leaving fingerprints all over the sides and corners. You voiced your annoyance with his behavior but, in normal Il Dottore fashion, he simply disregarded your complaints. 
Today was no exception; you had just come back from a trip in Liyue, exploring the depths of the Chasm and underground mines, and came back to his lab covered in that gross, dark goo. You weren’t experiencing any side effects from the substance thankfully, still, the doctor argued that there had to be something wrong somewhere. The dirt stuck to your clothes and had no intentions of coming off when you rubbed at it (you considered bugging the Regrator to pay for a new outfit because there was no way you were going to lose your hard-earned mora just because a hilichurl decided to fling a handful of that filthy mud at you), but that was the extent of your problems. You kept insisting to the doctor that you were fine, that you just needed a good, long, scalding hot shower to scrape the dirt off of your artificial skin, but he just wouldn’t let it go. 
You had taken off your overcoat, the extra layer being in the way of his handiwork and had tossed it somewhere on his desk in petty revenge. He paid no mind to the small mess you made of his workspace, his attention purely on you- or rather, his attention purely on a stubborn stain on the bottom of your neck, trickling down to your collarbone, stopping right before your inner layer of clothes. Right where that damn hilichurl had struck you. 
“Do I need to send a segment with you every time you go out or will you stop putting yourself in situations where you get all fucked up and have to crawl back to me?” he grumbles dramatically under his breath, loudly enough for you to hear. Purposely. 
With your head thrown back, tilted away from him to allow him the space to open up your neck panel to clean your inside system from the goo that had seeped through the cracks, you can do nothing but groan in annoyance, done with his passive aggressive comments demeaning your competency. 
“You keep saying that, but I doubt you or your clones would be able to keep up with me. All you ever do is stay holed up in your lab. How would a hermit possibly be of help to me?” you huff, staring up at the ceiling.  
Suddenly, you feel your hand clench and twitch repeatedly and you wince in discomfort. Glancing down, you see Dottore’s unamused and irritated gaze boring into you as he pinches the wire in your mechanism responsible for hand movement, a silent threat for you to tone down your attitude. 
“What? It’s true!” you double down stubbornly, smacking his fingers away from you with your free hand. He scoffs, irritated, but doesn’t respond. He had better things to do than to prove himself to you, anyways. While he sulks, you bring your (previously twitching) hand up to the light, rolling your wrist and wriggling your fingers to make sure he didn’t damage anything. 
“Next time I’ll just ask one of your clones to patch me up if you’re so pissed that I come see you when I get back from my trips,” you scoff, placing both hands flat on the vivisection table you were sitting on, leaning on them as you look at him with a raised brow. You can feel the tension radiating off of him, his jaw clenching as he straightens his back, looking (glaring) back at you. 
“Don't,” he says simply, taking a step towards you and bringing his hands back up to your throat to finish the job he had started earlier- getting rid of that pesky mud. 
You feel the atmosphere shift as clear as day. You may not be human, but you were pretty in-tune with emotions and how they worked; which was why you were even more confused as to why the Harbinger was acting this way. Tilting your head back to let him do what he was doing just a few minutes ago, you break the tense silence. 
“Then stop being on my case,” you huff, closing your eyes to let him do what he had to do. You hear him hum in response and hold back the urge to scoff at him and his childish antics. 
Dottore diligently and silently cleans the crevices of your neck and throat, nimble fingers fixing damaged wires and placing things back where they should be so everything is in order once more. With his usual mask absent, his face was impossibly close to your throat, almost inside of your puppet body as he studied how you worked. Instead of blood flowing through veins and creating a pulse, you had electro energy flowing through you, mimicking the veins you lacked. When you inhaled, a weak wave of energy would flow up the left side of your body, and when you exhaled it would go back down, and rinse and repeat. Dottore watched the process, pensive, while you stared at nothing, bored out of your mind. 
“Are you done yet?” you ask quietly, legs itching to hop off the metal table. Dottore stays quiet for longer than usual, lost in thought. 
In a flash, he puts his entire hand beneath your chest from the opening in your neck. His fingers brush something rubber-y in texture, digging deeper between your chest plate and the mess of cables mimicking a spine. You make a garbled noise of surprise, roughly pulled out of your thoughts and yank his hand out, face flushed with embarrassment and something akin to fury (but not quite). 
“What the fuck was that?!” you hiss, hand still holding his wrist firmly. Dottore watches the way his hand prickles with electro as it fades in the air, his eyebrows furrowed and expression indecipherable. Crimson eyes flicker back up to meet yours. You can't help the shudder that passes through your body, swallowing a lump in your throat nervously from the intensity of his gaze. 
“I wonder how your body would react if you were injected with hydro energy,” he murmurs to himself, still staring right at you. “Would you let me find out?” he asks, voice slightly louder than before. 
“Would you let me do more than just observe your inner machinery?” he asks. The Harbinger takes a step forward. 
“Would you let me toy with you?” 
Dottore, now staring down at your sat figure, carried an aura you couldn’t decipher. With his body blocking the overhead lighting, it almost looked like his hair was reflecting the buzzing fluorescent lights of his lab, icy hair surrounding his head like a gentle halo. You feel your mouth get dry, rendered unable to respond. 
“Only come to me. I’ll learn how your body works, inside and out. No one is to see you like this,” he whispers, face eerily still. “Not even my segments. I’ll behead them in front of you if need be.” 
Dottore held his face mere inches away from yours, his ragged breath tickling your cheeks as it made the stray strands of hair flutter. Your eyes never left his, not even when he brought one hand up to your face, sliding across your cheek to tangle itself into your hair while his other hand glid across the cables inside your chest cavity in uncharacteristic fondness. Though his fingers were gentle and soft, his eyes didn’t betray the flicker of something sinful. 
“Would you like that? To be able to study their innards,” he says in a sickly-sweet tone. You study his face; his eyes, usually swimming with irritation and contempt, held a hint of something akin to devotion. 
“Let me study yours. Let me pull you apart completely and then put you back together. I’m not satisfied with simply looking anymore,” he hisses, eyes widening. “I want to mark you from the inside. So let me.” 
You couldn’t find the will to protest. 
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rosedom · 23 days
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I can't go off-anon because,,, sideblog ;^; but its aureramphibian hi hello non-anonymous because I'm YOUR problem now. Suffer :)
My brain is about 90% thoughts of Pretty Fictional Men and about 50% of the time, it's specifically either Tighnari, Cyno, Kaveh, or Gaming and I feel like you would appreciate this Gaming thought, so,, here! Have! :D
im a huge sucker for secret relationships idk why but having a secret relationship with Gaming, not because either of you are embarrassed but like- it's still new, and he does NOT want to have to introduce you to his whole extended family because if one of his aunties saw y'all together and couldn't keep quiet about it- oof. He's already having nightmares about the amount of calls he'd get from relatives begging him to meet you if that were to happen. So to avoid that, he suggests you keep it secret for privacy :D And it works! But also sucks because he's so busy and his family likes to do the whole... surprise drop-in thing. So to avoid any Awkward Circumstances y'all are essentially restricted to your place. And this was literally all just background lead-up that doesn't really matter but ANYWAYS
Can you imagine him being so pent up, not because he hasn't seen you but because he HAS, he's seen you practically every day and it's killing him because it's always in public and you're both trying to be careful? He hasn't touched you in ages, he hasn't had you touch him in ages and it wears on him so much he actually turns down an extra job (something he NEVER does) to make sure he has time to go see you ;-; Sweet little lion ;-; (absolutely stealing that nickname for him from you unashamedly. you were right about it. If it ain't broke, don't fix it)
But god, he'd be accidentally teasing himself too!! Not even doing anything, just that it's been so long since he's seen you and he's So Goddamn Pent Up that he keeps thinking about you,,, your hands,,,,,, your body,,,,,,, how well you kiss him, touch him, fuck him,,,,,,,,, and he realizes he's not only almost to your house, but he's hard and achy, AND he's soaked through his boxers :( poor baby :(
When he finally makes it to your house you bet your sweet ass he's immediately kissing you, grabbing you, so much more uncoordinated than how he usually is that even without how he's literally whining into the kiss, you'd be able to tell he's needy. He just wants you so badly :(((( Wouldn't even care how, just needs you Right Fucking Now and however you want that to be he's already pliant and willing under your hands, slowly blinking at you with those beautiful eyes of his already hazy- Hell, he'd be happy if you shove your hand down his pants right here against the wall, fill him with your fingers and play with his cock, already sticky from having to walk all the way here in soaked boxers. Make sure you kiss him while you do, though, he'd be a little loud :( He really can't help it though! Poor baby's just missed you so much, finally having you all over him like this is turning his brain to mush :(
Anyways hope you enjoy >:] love u Rosey, mwah
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I ENJOYED THIS SO MUCH !! i am so sorry for such a late reply omg ,,, i had been thinking about this so so much but never got down to actually thinking up a post LOL
literally anything tighnari cyno kaveh ga-ming i will readily eat up (and eat you out for) . . . pls spam me. i think this is one of if not the hottest imagine i have ever received.
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so SEE, NORMALLY, secret relationships aren't my thing ,, but oh my fcking god, ur idea? i love u. i love u so much. "it doesn't really matter," u say, then drop the absolute best lore ever. kiss me.
THE TENSIONNNNN mmmm he's already so needy, even when it's not a secret dating scenario, so to be restricted like this . . . thank god his t-dick can't cause a noticeable boner through his already thick and draping pants, 'cos if so, he'd be absolutely fucked (wishing he got fucked fr) (⁠ ⁠;⁠∀⁠;⁠)
the side glances in public, the sweet smiles you give each other in those short seconds where nobody is looking . . . it gives him butterflies, makes his skin burn where your hand will brush his in passing, but it's also not enough—not nearly enough !! poor baby, havin' to touch himself to the thought of you when you're right there. it's different like this than before you two dated 'cos then he didn't know he could have you; but like this, when you've already loved him, fucked him, claimed him, how is he supposed to live without it? and his own hand—clumsy, never as good as your own fingers or, god, your cock—can only go so far.
sweet baby, sweet little lion, all hard n' wet because of you . . . pls steal the nickname idec i love pet names !!!
he'd turn down the new mission, the possibility of that extra mora, saying to himself he just wants to spend time with you—not anything else, nothing indecent, nothing of the sort !—except he's halfway to your house, and here he is, achy between his thighs and halfway in a trance because thinking about you has him thinking about your body, has him thinking about your hands, your hands on him, in him, and his cunt is just so empty, now, weakly clenching around nothing as he's lost in a daydream about you.
the idea of ga-ming bumbling through liyue all quiet, all serious looking, when he's normally so bubbly, loud—i want to have the mind to wonder what the folks on the street would say, but i also just. don't care. this is about ga-ming ! not them !!
and then he's at your door, barely giving you the chance to welcome him in and greet him before he's on you, clutching desperately at any part of you that he can reach and kissing you all sloppy. he's so so needy, and so so wet, and he's parting from your lips to look up at you so docile yet so fucking aroused, eyes blown wide and hazy . . . :( he deserves your touch after so long starved of it.
he'd keep going in for kiss after kiss, and he'd be whining so prettily, soft and breathy and high in his throat. i love him so much. pls ,, all of this happening not even two steps from the door . . . he just needs you so bad !!
slipping your hand down his pants between kisses, during kisses, hearing his moans tumble out of him only to be swallowed up by you immediately . . . just the thought of how fucking soaked ga-ming would be is so mmmmm; your fingers would slip inside oh-so easily, his cunt fluttering and welcoming one, two, three fingers in as your palm is left to grind against his cock rjjfhfkr
and you're kissing him as you do it all, keeping him quiet and pinned tight between you and the wall. 'cos he'd be so desperate for you, but you're just as desperate for him <333
be my problem. please. pls. i love you. i love this. this was so (⁠♡⁠ω⁠♡⁠ ⁠)⁠ ⁠~⁠♪ !!!!!
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justanotherdrfan · 2 months
Text
WELCOME ALL DANNY FANGIRLS TO YOUR INSTALMENT OF DANIEL RICCIARDO’S DTS BREAKDOWN! 🍯🦡
I’m leaving this one open since you all skipped straight to this episode! (I waited and I don’t know how)😂
S6E9 (Three’s a Crowd)
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GIF by @arturleclerc
DANNNNNNNNYYY BOYYY 😍😍😍😍😍😍
He’s already laughing (god I love him)
‘Alright, what’s up?, Daniel Ricardo, this is season six drive to survive, and yes I’m back’ (fangirling HARD)
WAIT HE WAS IN SYDNEY, HE WAS IN FUCKING SYDNEY (why did no one tell me I would have called sick at work)
Daniel and Blake I really wish you went ahead with that podcast because you two are poetic chaos together
Cue another Daniel montage (they have his whole discography on file don’t they?)
He looks so fucking tried though
Logan and Alex talking about DTS frothing at the mouth about Daniel returning is the most factually, correct thing I’ve ever heard 😂
Logan: ‘All I know is the most excited people when Danny Ricciardo came back was Netflix.’
Alex: ‘I literally think they had to change their pants three times. I know the episode already. Let…let me run it through. Ready? Here we have Danny Ricciardo watching on the sidelines. “Yeah, it hurts to not be racing.” Then all of a sudden, pans to Nyck de Vries. Lock up. [imitates brakes screeching]. Off the track. Crash. Oh shit! Boom. Fast-forward. Silverstone. Test. Daniel Ricciardo. Super quick. [laughs] Danny looking at it like…big smile on his face. “It is what it is. You know?” [man]“I never left” “I never left. I’m back,baby. Honey Badger. Don’t give a shit.” (Hire him now DTS because he nailed that)
Fuck why they got to follow that shit with Zandvoort though
Daniel whoring about in his Enchante tattoo thigh high shorts
“Feels right. Feels good” (It sure does Danny is sure does)
EVERYONE LOVES DANIEL
And they get him straight to a photoshoot to whore him out
THEY DID NOT USE HIM WINKING IN THE INTRO (da fuck you lot doing? Give the people what they want)
Yes Christian 2025 prospect (he’s a shoe in ahh? See what I did there) 😉👟🍾
FUCK YOU MICAHEL ITALIANO (why is he getting air time) I’m glad he’s left F1
OHH NO OHH NO OHH NO NO NO NO NO NO
IM CRYING AGAIN. I CRIED WHEN IT HAPPENED AND IM CRYING AGAIN
Ohh they have his X-ray
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Clairey bear
Cue Liam Lawson (I do love you but I missed Danny terribly)
The others telling Liam to be prepared (this is very welcome to our toxic work environment)
‘She doesn’t even go here’ (a Danica story)
Liam out qualifies all the red bull drivers (yes kiddo)
DANNY BACKS (SCREWS AND ALL) for engineering purposes only
Umm why are you hurting him? DONT TOUCH HIM! (Look yes I know it’s physiotherapy and he needs it. But I’ve broken my hand before the left one as well and driving a normal road car caused me to cry in pain so when I say don’t touch him I mean it)
I SWEAR TO GOD ZAK YOU STAY THEY HELL AWAY FROM HIM
Checo clips Yuki and he’s out (he probably thought it was Daniel trying to take his seat. It’s his in 2025 mate there’s no fighting it)
Ohh look Alpine with reliability issues (things you continue to see)
Yes DTS let’s show Russel’s crash from another angle 😂
POINTS FOR LIAM 🎉🥳
Are we positive he was in Sydney and not Perth?
Yes king SWEAT SWEAT SWEAT
Yuki GP time
Not Suzuka having Daniel, Yuki and Liam on all the banners
Poor Yuki being overwhelmed by the fans. I understand fans being excited but he’s cornered in the car and clearly doesn’t feel safe (and for Michael to be like it’s ok the fans are happy is actually the problem at hand. His and all the drivers safety has to come first and he point blank didn’t feel safe you arsehole Michael so it’s not okay)
Yuki honey it’s okay Liam not going to hit you
If we can’t have an Aussie a Kiwi will do
Liam finding out Daniel’s and Yuki are getting announced for 2024 🥺
Liam mate I’m sorry you deserve better
Mexi-coooooo
HES BACK BACK
Yes yes your P10 in the constructors (just you wait, just you fucking wait)
Checo out before turn 1 (its AUSGP all over again)
Ohh look another McLaren/Alpha Tauri incident 😤
No McLaren the plan is not to attack Daniel (haven’t you fucking done enough?)
P7 BABBYYYYYY
ENCHANTE, MON AMI
See your P8 now (told you to wait and see)
Yes Christian, Daniel did drive a good race (remember that and who didn’t)
Look at him and his little moustache
Will: ‘ I think this is only part one of a far wider story.’ (Yes 2024 season will be epic for Danny Ric)
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I'm gonna put the glitch in glitch duo right now and rant about them and how their glitches work because I am so normal about them (lie)
Okay, so I barely got into Lifesteal like. Late last year because of Squiddo joining and I lowkey got really hyped for it and seeing Ash and Squiddo together I was like.. Woah.. New fav duo alert.. And then found that there was no fancontent and had to make it myself so.
Anywho! Ashswag, as we already know, has that lil.. Thing over his left eye (?) That a lot of us (me) has interpreted as like. Glitching. So to start us off, I believe that glitching can stem from messing with your own player code/others player code/server codes/using mods with like. Virus' or something idk im not that smart. And from the Ashswag videos I've watched we can kind of tell where Ash fits in there by like. Fucking with how servers work and therefore fucking up his own code.
Squiddo's code is glitched because.. Have you watched Squiddo's videos? Naw but fr, she's constantly putting the most cancer inducing mods on her game, playing mods that can definitely fry their pc, playing minecraft on a USB DRIVE?? Which would DELETE chunks to MAKE MORE OF ITSELF so like. You can see where I'm going with this. So obviously, their code gets fucked up and the more they do these mods and plug ins and - whatever the hell, the more their code because intangible and unable to be fixed.
So, with that, I'm gonna go ahead and explain how I think their glitching works and how it affects their body/like.. Everything else.
Ashswag's glitches, as we can see, are more visible to the eye. Literally over his damn eye. I'm gonna go ahead and assume that gives him some partial blindness in his left eye. Also, from some fics that ive read ive seen people give him like, back problems and chronic pain that he probably had before but the glitches DEFINITELY don't help at all and instead make the pain way worse than it already is so. Yay!
While Ash's are more physical, I feel like Squiddo's are more like. Mental? If you catch my drift? While Ash is stumbling down into a heap of pain on the floor because his back is killing him, Squiddo is standing in the hallway staring at him wondering why the guy from the one house smp is crumbling on the floor in front of them on a server they swore they were not on a few weeks ago.
So yeah. Memory loss Squiddo. Also inspired from a fic that I do know! I'll link the fics I got inspired from at the end because they are genuinely such good reads and great ideas.
But I decided that memory loss best fit Squiddo, because tbh they are pretty forgetful. And I take their goofy hijinks and shenanigans as just. Squiddo having to recollection of anything and just trying to do something (which she's probably done before) to job their memory but oh well. I feel as if the memory loss is more of a living in the farlands thing rather than glitched out fucked-up code inducing thing, but whatever. The only time we see glitched out Squiddo is on thumbnails! So I feel like whenever Squiddo joins a server or world that's previously glitched or like. They're already pretty glitched, it really takes its toll and fucks up the whole thing and makes it a memory loss disaster for Squiddo.
And because of Squiddo's horrible memory, they can never recollect and find out what the hell happened to the world to make it this glitched out when in reality she's the reason the world is so glitched.
Except when joining servers! Surprisingly, they don't experience those things when joining servers while when joining worlds the world would become discombobulated and delete itself just after a few hours. Funsies! Which they realize when they join the one house smp just to explore it and then they find ASHSWAG!! And then realizes that HE'S GLITCHED TOO!! YAYY!!! And then they absolutely BOMBARDDDD him with questioned like "why do my worlds always delete themselves?", "what causes someone to have a glitched code?" And "how are servers able to not glitch out?" Etc etc which Ashswag answers and then BOOM! FRIENDSHIP!!!
Basically the only reason servers are able to work for them is because theres like.. This other thing cody whatever that prevents it to idk im not smart. This is not compliant with my past fics written about this stuff but oh wellsies.
Another thing I have made up is 'glitch fever' where basically they just get sick because of their fucked up code and glitches. Yeah. Also based off a fic I read where being around Ashswag too much can make you sick and stuff. I feel like their are certain people who are immune to it like Reddoons (purely because of Swagdoons and nothing else) and Squiddo (because they also glitch tf out and Swagsquid/silly).
Another thing I've like. Headcanoned (because this is all just me reading too much into things and making too many headcanons about) is that their glitches also like.. Made their body tempature irregular. This is so random but it was just something I thought of and then I wrote a fic about it. Like, Ash is constantly fucking cold and on a hot ass texas summer day he'll feel a little warm. Same for Squiddo just vice versa. I love them. The sillies. I want to put them in a terrarium and study them.
That's.. All I have I'm pretty sure. Hello I am Swagsquid the #1 Glitch Duo Writer/Enthusiast and the #1 Swagsquid Shipper (the ONLY Swagsquid shipper..) and thank you for listening to my ted talk.
Fics I took inspiration from:
"Dear Diary: Today, I killed someone" by Fey_wilde on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/52170592)
"I Feel Too Weak to Stand" by Eternal_Era on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/48067240)
"fault lines" by garlic_sauc3 on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/41924196)
Fics I've written based on this idea:
"Glitch fever" by (ME!!) Swagsquid on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/53400835)
"The warmth of another's embrace" by Swagsquid on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/53449573/chapters/135284551)
"Forgotten hot chocolate" by Swagsquid on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/54350146)
(Please read the tags and ratings before reading some of the fics!)
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sun-stricken · 2 months
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Some ideas for you! Take your pick!
Gray frequents the infirmary the most. In one of my ideas lately, after thinking about iced shell, maybe ice make makes the body a bit more…prone to cracking? Maybe he bruises easy and gets a lot of head wounds. It’s why he’s always in bandages longer. I like the idea of Porlyusica getting sick of him.
Team Natsu/the guild/slayers taking care of him, even when he doesn’t realise it. (Against pervs, against himself, maybe people are a bit racist (with him being not from Fiore).
Gray gets sad sometimes and dissociates.
Gray has night terrors so he has sleeping pills, but on missions he also has caffeine tablets to keep him awake so he doesn’t have terrors around them. Safe to say, they aren’t happy when they find this.
Lucy asks Gray about where he’s from, traditions etc, and the guild realises he might be homesick so they secretly try to learn things for him. (Over the years they’ve picked up swear words (Gray doesn’t realise he’s doing it and they’ve never told him))
Gray’s actually quite touch starved. His body temperature is cold so most people stay away/ don’t touch him (but don’t realise they’re doing it). The only one who can stand is Natsu because of his magic. Maybe it gets worse after becoming a slayer.
…also do you take spicy requests?
you cant just give me all these amazing concepts and tell me to pick☹️ i will do a little for all of them if it kills me
Also yes! i absolutely do take nsfw requests! feel free to ask me anything! im surprised it took so long to ask me that tbh
there is a lot here so vv
1.
* Hes the single reason why the guild infirmary is always having to restock
* Due to Grays multiple usages of iced shell some of his body did turn to ice, most sections of his bones, it looks like a normal bones but it acts like ice, which means hes more likely to break a bone
* unfortunately, its not like a normal broken bone for obvious reasons. itll splinter and have hairline cracks all over the bones before it breaks.
* It takes less time to heal than a normal break, he just has to get it wrapped and limit his usage of his magic so it can ‘heal’ (as in, ice it over again) the breaks and cracks. It takes less time to heal and also less pressure to break, win lose situation tbh
* Which is also why head wounds are especially dangerous for him, skull fractures are more common for him than anyone would like, which is to say any at all
* His external body temperature is low and causes him to bruise like a peach, getting a friendly slap on the back can cause him to bruise for weeks, especially from Erza
* bro hasnt gone a day without a bruise in like ten years
* Hes been dragged to Porlyusica so many times now that anytime she sees him (on the field, in her office, even completely out of context and hes not visibly injured) its like second nature to check him out first
* if she could go a month, or even just two weeks! without seeing him she might consider changing her views on humanity (probably not but its the thought that counts)
* Also Gray has small sections of what people think is frostbite on his hands and feet. It doesnt hurt or limit him at all but theyre there, showed up some time post devil slayer magic
* ALSO! His blood runs slower and is darker due to his low body temperature, causes him only the vaguest of problems but its a thing (this is common in most powerful ice wizards)
2.
* Gray likes to pretend hes good at taking care of himself, but hes not hes really not
* Luckily he has a lot of nosy and protective friends thatll do it for him (in their own ways)
* Natsu literally temperature exploding some guys glass at a bar when he got wayyyy too friendly and handsy with Gray
* they were kicked out but he was really proud of himself
* Rogue drawing shadows towards Gray if he needs to sleep and its too bright, or Sting creating a warm light beam when its dark out and Gray wants to embrace his inner cat and sleep in a sunbeam
* Wendy checking him over first bc she knows hes one of the people who wouldnt ask for help if he was injured
* hes had multiple people physically remove him from fights/training sessions because he was visibly pushing himself way too hard
* Part of the reason Gray learned Fioren so fast was because he was sick of people looking at him like he was stupid for not speaking ‘right’
* he mentioned this to the little slayer group they got goin on and from then on out they were like, hella hyper vigilant with anything that could make him insecure like that again
3.
* It really scared him the first couple times he did it, it still does. He hates losing time
* It started happening during his time with Ur, he cant remember a lot of it, training, blink, fighting, blink, training, blink, training, you get the idea
* It doesnt happen often, and he tried not to think of it past the point of trying to get it to stop
* Its happens often when hes highly stressed but theres no immediate physical threat, his brain doesnt understand whats going on or why its so stressed but knows he doesnt need to physically protect himself yet so it mentally protects him (if that makes sense), usually when hes alone, or when a threat is gone
* he confided in Erza about this once, and now more times than not when he ‘wakes up’ shes there talking to him
* only part he feels is good about it is that it makes him exhausted and lets him sleep easier
* He doesn’t usually dissociate often, not that he has much of a choice, if he did it wouldnt happen at all, but it was a lot worse when he was younger, his memories of early fairy tail are all blurry and he felt like he was on autopilot even when he was ‘awake’
* he hates it
4.
* After his team found out abt his vast array of pharmaceuticals they were so confused and concerned and probably borderline paranoid, because who needs that many medications for one person??
* Gray had been taking sleeping pills at a high enough dose to let him have a dreamless sleep for so long that most over the counter brands dont actually work on him
* but he kept all the old bottle that didnt work just in case he got desperate to sleep and they suddenly magically worked again
* The caffeine tablets were self explanatory after seeing all the sleeping meds, but he also (unwillingly) admitted he takes them on missions so he wouldnt wake them if he had a nightmare, and also for days when they were especially bad so he could go long enough without sleep hed just crash and sleep with no issues. Canr have a nightmare if you dont sleep
* His team was also extremely unimpressed by these explanations
* Erza and Natsu (and also Happy) strong armed him into going to Porlyusica for actual helpful solutions since he refused to go to his actual doctor
* While Lucy and Wendy disposed of the full fucking pharmacy (seriously, he coulda started a business or smth) he had in his bedroom
* For some odd reason he felt lighter and less moody when he was on actual helpful medication and was getting genuine rest
* how strange
* and if his team checks his house for another pharmacy in the making thats nobodies business but theirs
* Also Erza tried to ban Gray from caffeine while on a quest , or at least limit it, but he looked at her like she was absolutely batshit crazy to the point she got embarrassed and had to retract the ban
* But she will tie him to the bed to make him sleep on quests if she has to
5.
* The first time Lucy asked where Gray was from was before Galuna, he ended up giving her a shady answer and redirecting the question to her (reminder, before galuna, before phantom lord) which she ended up also being a bit cagey about so she let it go
* But Lucy is nosy (endearing) by nature, so she asked if he had any different holiday type traditions sometime after Galuna, and to the surprise of, well, literally everyone, he did and gave examples
* which lead down a rabbit hole of the guild fretting a bit abt how to make him comfortable (even though hed been with them for a decade) bc he mentioned he used to be really homesick the first couple years, and sometimes still is
* Most the guild still had no clue where he was from so they were really just running in circles for awhile
* Levy tried to figure it out from the time he accidentally dropped, what she assumed to be colorful curse words, random foreign language bits
* didnt really work but she tried
* so for months he was bombarded with ‘subtle’ questions about his hometown and its culture, which got shut down most the time
* Thats not to say he didnt give them anything, he gave them enough that they were incorporated into existing traditions and holidays they already celebrated
* it was a very sweet gesture that Gray absolutely did not tear up at, so shut up—
6.
* Gray is the most touch starved fool on the planet. ive always loved the idea of him liking touch a lot
* He grew up in a pretty affectionate family, his parents were always around to ruffle his hair, or hug, or hold his hand, or carry him, they were just very physically affectionate and he enjoyed it
* With it made him nauseous, guilty really, because Ur and Lyon were also physically affectionate but it wasnt them, it wasnt his family
* Also it was plain uncomfortable at times, part of learning ice magic was to almost numb himself to cold, but in the beginning numbed him to everything and it became uncomfortable to be touched because it was tingly and it hurt
* Early Fairy Tail he was completely closed off, couldnt stand being touched, didnt want to get cozy and make friends because he planned to leave anyways.
* Ice mages (Fire mages also) temperatures can fluctuate depending on how they feel, for example, if they’re experiencing negative emotions their temperature and the space around them will get colder
* and Gray used to be so angry and upset all the time, and hed just beginning to learn magic so he didnt know how to fix it yet, which caused a lot of discomfort for people.
* People didnt stay around him long because the discomfort of being too cold, and what was he gonna do about it? ask them to come back?? hell no
* So he gained a reputation and people didnt want to disrespect a volatile childs apparent boundaries so they didnt question it
* He was fine with fighting being the only real prolonged touch hed get, totally
* But Natsus got this thing about him that makes him think he can do the impossible, which includes shaking Grays world view and comfort levels
* At some point in their teens Natsu would not let go of the alleged fact that Grays didnt like being touched for some reason, so he did what he does best and pressed the issue
* it ended with Gray being a puddle in his lap while he had a crisis about everything he thought he knew about himself while Natsu celebrated his victory against him
* Its not completely public knowledge but the guild most definitely knows at least a little about how much Gray is touch starved
* he doesnt openly welcome it with open arms but if its happening and he trusts the person hes not gonna say no
* he probably gets a euphoria high from a head pat or smth
* After getting his devil slayer magic is absolutely got worse, having two powerful ice magics, one of which he was still struggling to get the hang of, in one body made it difficult to control the temperature around him, and after long enough people would start shivering if he wasnt careful
* it sucked, totally and completely sucked
* Natsu still remained unbothered and would increase his own temperature to counterbalance Grays, which helped a lot
* he still gets all up in Grays space no matter how much Gray tell him to fuck off, he knows he needs it
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