#idk why i'm suddenly having emotions about this it's all just catching up to me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

catzula · 3 years

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So, you chose the indigo tent?

Welcome to Shinsou's route on something wicked this way comes. I hope you enjoy.

a/n: so, here goes nothing. I'm really excited for this and I really hope you like it! Leave me a like, a reblog or a comment if you enjoyed it 😗

a big thank you to @qawaii for beta reading because you are the only person I can send this to beta and not die of embarrassment. Also thank you love for always motivating me and hyping me I love you muah.

Warnings: NSFW! Minors do not interact! Smut. 7.4k of pwp. Degrading, blow job, orgasm denial (once), hair pulling, slight choking, calling good girl, enemies to lovers kinda vibe, idk what else

Everyone has their low points of life. This night must be yours, you think.

You're tired- exhausted and on the brink of possibly passing out, even; hungry, frustrated, cold, and shivering, and everything seems to be going wrong.

Standing on the hill before the tents, you try to focus on why you're here. Never to feel like this again, of course, but it's hard to push yourself to take one more step at this point.

You have to find Aizawa; you repeat yourself. Find him, convince him to take you in so you won't ever feel this hopeless, so you won't ever think if you can survive sleeping in a night as cold as this. You can't go back, won't go back to that place you once called home. You're determined to find a new home or never belong anywhere again.

There is a dull pain on your fingers, feeling like they're frozen and burning. You know you gave to find somewhere warm to at least wear the exhaustion off of you, regain movement in your fingers and feel like you won't pass out any second.

You'd rather sleep, but you're more than aware how dangerous that could be, so you'd have to yield to a stop break, instead. As the thought seeps into your mind, your brain doesn't even give you the chance to rethink; quick to come up with more reasons for why you should rest first, then find Aizawa.

It's the sweet hope of finding warmth that pulls you closer to the tents. You know it's mad to even think of going in any of them, straight into the territory of people that are freaks, people with quirks that makes you an easy bait for them to kill.

But exhaustion has that kind of an effect on people, and even the worst ideas seem bright at the time, mind foggy, unable to give you a reasonable answer when you ask yourself what's the worst that could happen.

You won't be staying for long, anyway, if anyone finds you, you'll flee- you're smart, not so strong but quick, you can run, right?

Your eyes scan the tents to see which one you can go in and out of without being noticed, and you're quick to eliminate the red and black ones.

The red tent has torches all over, so there's no way you can try and sneak in. And the black tent- well, you don't have a good feeling about it.

The tent closest to you has heavy-looking, dark blue curtains, but when you look closer, you can see the light coming from there, too. Your body getting heavier and heavier by the second, and you're pouting as your eyes fall on the indigo, purple tent. A few careful steps taken closer, you confirm there isn't light coming from inside.

As you come even closer, so close that the heavy, velvet-like material of the tent brushes your naked arms, making goosebumps run down your body. You wait for a few seconds for a sound, anything that indicates there is someone there, but after a few minutes of waiting, you conclude there isn't.

You're reluctant but quick to slip through the curtains, staying close to the exit so you can flee without having to face anyone.

It doesn't take long for your eyes to adjust in the darker room, and you're careful as you scan the room step by step.

It's not massive, but the area still seems bigger than any tent you've seen. It's almost twice your room- your old room.

Head pounding with exhaustion creeping in, you find a hiding place behind a cupboard in the corner. Your body acts before you, slipping in the small opening with ease. It's an advantageous hiding place , giving you the chance to spy on the entrance without blatantly sticking out.

As you wait for someone to come in, for something to happen in this dead of the night, your body starts feeling the signs of exhaustion even worse than before, with finding a warm place and somewhere to sit, adrenaline slowly leaving your body.

And before you know it, you're asleep.

You only after realize that you hadn't thought this through.

You wake up by the dim, reflected light of a candle- you're lucky you're a light sleeper, or you wouldn't have woken up to someone entering the tent.

The silhouette of a man dances on the floor, crouching down as he holds the candle in one hand and busies the other with the pile of clothes. Not sure when he entered the tent, it seems he's not yet aware of your presence, and you know you have to get out before he does.

Noticing his back is turned to you, you finally gather the courage to peep your head from where you sit. A purple head of hair is what you first notice, his ltousled ocks sticking in every direction as if he faced a thunderstorm.

He's reaching towards the pile of clothes, eyes half open as a look of exhaustion challenging yours lingers on his face.

As you stretch your head a little more from the corner you're hiding in, you finally see something hiding between the pile of clothes. It's a cat, you realize. The man's hand runs over the black fur; it makes the cat close his eyes and lean to the touch as he continues to pat its head, scratching under its ears.

You're not aware how intensely you're watching him, wide eyes following his movements, how his odd hair color catches the dim candlelight on itself, soft shadows dancing on the sharp, handsome features of his face.

You know you have to run, get out of here before he notices you, but it's like you're in a faze, curiosity boiling in your body.

It's a scene to behold, the pair of a mad-looking man and a black cat relishing in each others' presence as you gasp and retract back when the cat suddenly opens its eyes, golden gaze looking directly at you.

Your heart drumming in your ears as you sink more into the corner you're in, you miss how the candle he's holding flickers and the way his head tilts your way so slightly.

For a few minutes, nothing happens. You're too afraid to breathe, let alone reach back out to see what the man's doing. It's silent other than your booming heart, and despite knowing you have to get out of there- now, you can't do anything but wait.

"Aren't you cold?" The voice breaks the silence in the tent, a deep grumble that turns your stomach upside down. You think you recognize it; you've heard it earlier today, quickly depicting who he is; the man with the black, beak-like mask who was doing the hypnosis tricks.

"Does anyone want to volunteer for this trick?" He had asked many times that night. "If yes, cheer for me so I can see who does."

It's an automatic response; to cheer with the whistling and clapping crowd, and you hadn't noticed the self-satisfied smile he hid behind the mask at getting a reply from everyone watching him.

"I'm talking to the cat, not to the person hiding behind the cupboard, by the way." The man speaks again, a sarcastic comment that comes out of his lips so indifferently, and it shows how unfazed he is even by having another presence hiding in his tent.

Even the thought of it is chilling, but you don't give yourself the time to ponder about it, now that your cover is blown, leaping towards the exit. You're fast and agile, and Shinsou thinks you would've escaped if you were in the presence of anyone else.

But you aren't, and you soon come to realize that as well.

As you push the velvet curtains and the cold air hits your face, you're sure you've escaped since the man hasn't moved from where he stood. Still, not taking a second more, you're about to disappear into the night.

But instead of running after you, you hear him speak.

"Stop," It's a simple command that would've made you scoff any other time. Does this man really think you would-

stop.

Just in the border of the night and the tent, you suddenly lose the ability to control your body.

You freeze, despite your mind screaming at you to get out of there; you're not able to move an inch as you watch the man as he walks towards you, painfully slow, too.

As he stops before you, you're forced to realize just how bigger he is than you. Crazy locks of hair defy gravity, looking deep blue instead of the purple you had seen in his show.

He looks mean as he stands before you, eyes locked on you. Dangerous, even.

Stuck in a body you can't charge, you have to wait as his eyes scan you with a frown on his lips, the only emotion available on his face being a silent surprise and tiredness. Even with the situation you're in, you can't help but notice he's even more handsome up close. Secretly admiring his dark indigo eyes looking at you with suspicion, the circles under his eyes giving him an even more stern look, lips pressed into a line, high cheekbones shadowing his cheeks.

"Speak." He commands once again, and you fear if you had control of your body, you might've shivered at his tone.

"Wh-what did you do to me?!" It's your first reaction to regaining control; it makes the purple-haired man scoff. He leans a little closer to you, the ends of his locks close to grazing your face, but not quite, inspecting you with a scorning look and a mean frown. He's the source of the tinge of lavender smell in the room, you realize. That and something a little more... musky.

Despite having the control to speak, you're silent as he judges you, and you swear the corner of his lips quirk at that, too. "You were at the show today, weren't you? I think you can guess what's happening."

"You- you hypnotized me!" You shout, terrified. When he hears the accusing tone of your voice, the man quirks a brow at you.

"You broke into my tent." He mocks you with a smile, looking you up and down. "Aren't you cold?" He repeats. "Come in."

Your body obeys the commend, following the man back into the tent you just escaped, your body once again meeting the lavender-tinted warm air. You stand in the middle of the room as you watch him plop himself on a seat, legs wide open, almost invitingly so, his lips curved into a smile as his gaze keeps wandering on you.

You're unable to help it when your gaze starts shifting on his form, too, especially with the way he's looking at you now; you're not sure if it's the harsh shadows on his face that makes him look so irresistible, with that knowing smirk when he catches your eyes flicking lower than they should. When he quirks a brow at you, with eyes that almost tell you; I know what you're thinking, it suddenly feels a little too warm.

A hum vibrates in the air before he speaks again. "Tell me, pretty girl," he says, "why were you in my tent?"

As soon as you hear the command, you brace yourself to blurt out the whole truth, but- you don't. Questioning eyes finding him; he shrugs. "I'm not going to force it out of you."

He looks so smug with the way he says it, too, making you scoff with narrowed eyes. "Oh, how generous of you."

He ignores the mocking tone of your voice, the only indication he even heard them being the slight tilt of his lips. "If I knew you wouldn't flee the moment I let you go, too, you wouldn't be in this situation, either."

"Is that so?" You mutter, seemingly disinterested. "I will, though."

Your words seem to amuse him, the way you resist him, despite being entirely under his mercy, acting like he has no power over you.

So he smiles; it's deceptive, dark, exciting. It makes the air shift into something new; something that feels thicker, hotter, lustful.

He seems indifferent, however, and you hope he's blind to how your body reacts, as well, to when he sighs, hands running through his tangled, odd-colored locks.

"Why are you still keeping me here, anyway?" You blurt out, wanting to get out of here before you do something... mad.

"I'm curious." He answers the question, a smile resting on his plush lips as he shrugs. "Why were you in my tent?"

Eye for an eye, you think as he counters you with his question. He had answered yours, and it was only fair if you did the same. "I was cold," you tell him, staying as vague as possible. "Your tent seemed warm."

"That's it?" His brows arch up. "The rest isn't any of your business."

"I'm curious."

"I don't even know your name!" You huff angrily. "All I know is you're a guy who works in a circus with powers that leave me a puppet in your hands. I'm not here to entertain you."

As you blurt the last sentence, you don't miss his dark chuckle at it. "We'll see about that," he mutters, but before giving you the chance to speak, he speaks again. "My name's Shinsou. Feeling better?"

"Much." You mock him with an exaggerated smile, voice hostile. "Now will you let me go?"

"Why would I?" He laughs. "You still haven't answered my questions, and haven't you heard it's only courtesy to tell your own name when someone tells you theirs?"

"And haven't you heard it's being a basic human fucking being not to keep people under your influence like this?"

A beat of silence passes as he ponders on an answer and fails, and both of you know he lost this round. "Kitty's got claws, I see." He swipes his tongue on his bottom lip, amusedly watching your reaction at the pet name. You sneer at him- but Shinsou's a little too interested in this to miss the way you shift in your place, your quickening breaths, the flutter of your eyes.

"Don't call me that."

"Why? Got you excited?" Shinsou quirks a brow when you squeak angrily. "You won't even tell me your name."

You would've rolled your eyes if you could, instead just sighing at the purple-haired man. "It's Y/N." You answer. "My Name's Y/N."

It's been a while since Shinsou had this much fun; he missed this game of cat and mouse.

"Very well then, Y/N," he repeats your name as suggestive as possible, "would you answer my question? I can force the answer out of you, you know." He looks amused as he leans forward in his chair, suddenly much more interested in what you say, how you move. Like a predator watching its prey. "All it takes is a command."

Each word makes its way out of his lips so smoothly- you shiver at the way he speaks them. And you're disappointed when you realize not with fear.

It was a lost game the moment you even felt a tinge of lust towards the man, but you doubt there is anyone who can resist his charm. Still, you refuse to play into his hand, choosing to fight submitting to him just like that.

"With your witchcraft or whatever it is, yes." You shoot back, "but you can never control me without it." You feel needles of excitement run over your skin.

"Hm?" He quirks a brow, a feline cat on his lips, making you shiver with the lust settling on his gaze. Your eyes follow the movement of his adam's apple when he gulps. "You think I can't make you do as I say without my powers?" His voice drops an octave, and it almost makes you gasp.

"I know you can't." You sneer. "I would never let you."

"Big words from a little girl. Are you challenging me?"

"And what if I am?"

"Well," Shinsou slides his tongue over his lip, your gaze follows the movement. "you'll have to prove it to me."

As he speaks the words, the heaviness that had consumed your body disappears, as well. Your eyes shoot up- only meeting his mocking indigo gaze. You don't need him to tell you what to do, as one glance is enough for you to see how his pants seem a little strained over his crotch, a print making itself visible.

"What?" He asks, a grin resting on his lips as you stay still. His voice is deep, a guttural, almost tired tone that has you shivering with each way he speaks his words. "All bark, no bite? I thought you were up for a challenge- oh." You effectively shut him up when you settle before the man in one quick motion, relishing in the way his eyes widen, a content, almost excited grin consuming his face.

"You were saying something?" You purr innocently, as if you're not kneeling between his legs, licking your lips and giving him a glance from beneath your lashes.

"Nothing," Shinsou huffs out a laugh, settling in his chair to give you better access. "Do go on."

His dick is even more prominent now, you notice, a wicked smile settling on your lips. You lift your hand to trace his cock, touch ghosting him from over the material of his pants. He's semi-hard beneath your fingers, but even then, you have to muffle a gasp at just how big he is. Unfortunately, he seems to notice the widening of your eyes and your gulp.

He leans forward to tease you, but you don't give him a chance. His eyes flutter close when your hand finally takes him in your hold. "Shit-" Shinsou curses, his tongue darts out to wet his lips as you palm him over the material of his pants, not fast nor hard enough to satisfy him but to keep him tittering on edge. "You fucking tease." He sounds out of breath, but somehow manages to open his eyes to give you a dark look.

"Can't wait to fuck it out of you."

Shinsou waits, endures your torture until you yourself can't, growing impatient to feel him in your mouth.

His chuckle sinister as he aids you while your fingers work his pants off, leaving you face to face with his now hard cock, a small patch of wetness painting his briefs a darker color.

"Look what you did to me," Shinsou heaves, forcing himself to keep his indigo eyes open and on you. "making me hard without even taking me in your mouth."

You bite your lip as your hands slip beneath his boxers, feeling him hot and pulsing under your touch for the first time. You both groan at the sensation.

As you finally push his briefs down, you first see a tuff of deep-purple hair, his cock red and angry. "Ah, fuck." He curses at the contact with the cold air, his head lolling and falling back slightly.

"If it's too much-" he breathes before you can move any further, "tap my thigh twice, or yell bandaid." He only lets you go on when you nod, making sure you understood what he said.

Without waiting any longer, you take him in your hand, and it only makes you realize he's even bigger than you originally had thought. You try to hide your doubts on if you're even going to be able to fit him in your mouth, but he realizes anyway. "What?" Shinsou mutters breathily, "scared?"

You don't answer him, leaning forward to take the sensitive tip between your mouth, instead. The bitter taste of precum has a tinge of sweetness to it, and you don't even realize you start suckling on it a bit harder to get more of the taste.

"Oh- fucking hell." He runs his hands through his hair with a loud groan, a borderline moan, when you suck particularly hard, twirling your tongue around his sensitive head. The sound makes its way straight down to your core.

Your other hand comes up to cup his balls as you let go of his angry red tip, tracing his cock to the base with kisses planted along his shaft. "Ah- fuck, fuck, fuck!" Shinsou groans when you massage his balls softly, leaving kisses on the base, your other hand pumping him slower than he wants it.

"Stop fucking teasing." He growls, voice breathy and shallow. "Or are you afraid -ah- you can't take it all?"

The smug grin he has, despite your best efforts to wipe it off has you fuming. You know he only says it to rile you up, but it works. "Shut up." You spit at the handsome man, not even missing a beat or trying to ease him in as you start pushing yourself on his length. It's pure spite, he knows it too, but it only makes it more fun for Shinsou.

You underestimated him.

You open your mouth as much as you can, jaw aching almost immediately with the pressure, but you try to discard the feeling, focused on having as much of him in your mouth.

"Ah fuck!" He groans out loudly, hips twitching, a thrust in your welcoming mouth before he can catch himself. "Good fuckin' girl," Shinsou breathes, his hand flying to your head as support, pushing you even further down. You almost miss the subtle whiny moan he lets out when you gag loudly around him. The head of his cock hitting the back of your throat as Shinsou keeps pushing you down on his cock mindlessly, your heart drums in your ears, jaw aching, breaths shallow and insufficient.

"Look at you- oh, look at you." Shinsou mutters between his ragged breaths. "Such an obedient little girl, so pretty, so eager-" his warm cock thrusts deeper in your mouth and makes you gag once again, tears that had welled in your eyes before now spilling down your cheeks. Shinsou's half-lidded gaze falls on you, face wet with drool, tears, and his precum, and you feel his cock twitch along with a groan, "-so eager to please me."

You wish- you wish you could protest, say he's wrong, that you don't care the slightest bit about how he feels, but you can't. And not because of his cock stuffing your mouth, either.

Instead, you feel the blood starting to rush downwards, straight to your pussy, making you soil your panties with how he spits out each syllable.

Shinsou's aware of this, too, how effective his words are. His head falls back, weak to the pleasure you're giving him, moaning and gagging around his length as he thrusts faster into you. The dull pain in your skull feels so good, the ache of your throat, his cock hot and heavy on your tongue-

"You're- you're getting off on this, huh?" Shinsou tightens his grip on your hair. "You like it when I call you a good girl? You like it when I use you as a fuck hole?"

You try to lie, shake your head no, but he doesn't give you a chance, no room to move your head with how tight his hold is. With one thrust exceptionally deep, Shinsou laughs almost cruelly as he speaks. "Of course, you do. You're sucking me so fucking well; it's impossible you don't."

"Good girl- good fucking girl, I bet you're soaking in your panties, too, huh? What a little slut. I thought you weren't going to give in? I thought you said I couldn't control you?"

"Fuck you." You spit out when you pull away from his cock, but he doesn't seem pleased by it. "Don't speak with your mouth full, darling." Shinsou growls, his hand cupping your jaw and forcing your eyes to meet his, fingers digging deep into the soft of your skin. "Didn't anyone teach my baby any manners? Or are you just too dumb to learn?"

You open your mouth to say something, but before you can even utter a word, his long fingers force their way through your lips; whatever you were going to say stays as a muffled moan.

"You know, from the moment I saw you all I thought about as you talked and talked and talked was how I wanted to put that big mouth of yours into good use."

In all honesty- it was all you thought about as well.

With seeing the glint in your eyes, Shinsou huffs out a laugh. "Oh, look at my pretty little slut." He forces his fingers even deeper, making you gag. "You think I don't know what you're thinking? You think I don't know how much you want my cock in your mouth? Such a whore, hiding in my tent. You did this on purpose, didn't you? Came here to get fucked like a bitch in heat by one of us freaks?"

The last words are but a haze to you since by then; he's already pushing himself back and forth past your abused lips, moaning at the feeling of your warm, wet mouth, without giving you the time to think, to breathe, to accustom. Shinsou holds a ruthless pace, gripping your head fest by the hair as he groans and moans, making you squirm under him. "Good girl- ah, fuck, such a good girl, suck my cock just like that- ah!"

"Fuck- I'm coming." You almost don't hear him, only raise your gaze to his half-lidded eyes and feel his cock twitch between your lips. "I'm coming- ah- shit, shit shit!"

Your moans get louder as his thrusts get sloppier, and you feel his whole body tremble at your voice. "I'm gonna- fuck!" Shinsou finally feels himself falling over the edge he's been dancing on, his hot cum shooting down your aching, abused throat, moaning when he notices how eagerly you swallow his cum.

His body falls limp back on the seat, chest heaving with deep, heavy breaths. There is a sheen layer of sweat covering Shinsou's body, making the muscles of his body shine under the dim candlelight.

All you hear in the quiet tent is his deep breaths, his head resting back, eyes closed, and he seems exhausted. A few minutes pass for him to pull himself together, opening his eyes to look at you, and- fuck he's hard again.

"Are you okay?" You shake your head, suppressing a smile at his now even messier-looking hair.

"Are you okay?" You ask smugly, coughing once because of the ache. "Thought you were gonna- hey!" You squeak as he jumps on his feet, and in a moment, you find yourself swept off the floor and in his arms. "I see you still have words to speak." Shinsou laughs, his face so close to yours, you feel his breath fanning against your ear, and he feels you tremble between his arms. He quirks a brow at your surprised reaction. You hadn't expected him to be able to continue, truth be told.

"What?" He continues, "I thought I made myself clear when I said I'd fuck it out of you."

You try to keep your last bit of resistance in you by speaking, "I'd like to see you try." But both of you seem aware you've already lost.

"Oh, I'm sure you do." Shinsou gives you a look before placing- throwing you on the unmade bed, eliciting a loud gasp from you. The dim candlelight hits his naked form in a way that has you rubbing your legs in anticipation. He isn't bulky but well-built and muscular, enough to toss you around with ease, enough to have your mouth watering at the thought of running your fingers over his well-defined muscles.

His gaze predatory, Shinsou looks dissatisfied eyeing you. "Strip." He orders, a knowing smile finding its way on his lips as you realize he won't use his powers but knows you'll obey his command like a good girl.

And you do, too. Maybe it's the anticipation or the uncanny glint in Shinsou's eyes that get to your head, but thoughts of defiance are thrown out of the window as you're shrugging off your clothes without giving it a second thought.

"That's it." He grins, his index finger just barely ghosting over your thigh, and he relishes how you squirm because of it. "Look how good you can be for me."

"Such a pretty girl," his hand continues circling your bare legs, getting dangerously close to where you need him the most, but never quite giving it. "My pretty girl." You feel him smile on your skin, littering it with kisses and bites as his fingers ghost over your pussy.. "A shame she has that bratty streak, though."

Shinsou clicks his tongue, suddenly pulling his hand back away, suppressing a smile at your needy whine. It's the kind of sound that's pushing him closer to ruining you by the second.

"No, no, baby, don't cry." You feel his hand cup your face, pads of his fingers tracing your face. His thumb grazes your lips, tracing the outline and pushing in, the sudden intrusion making you moan around it. "I'm here to help you with that."

Help you, he does. You feel his finger graze your clit, circling it just barely but even that slightest contact has you gasping for more after spending that long focused on him.

"Look at you," Shinsou tuts disappointedly, "just barely touched you, and you're soaking wet. Did you enjoy sucking me that much? Did you like how my dick tastes so much that it turned you on?"

"I-" you try to gather your thoughts, but he silences you by pushing one of his fingers in your pussy, his fingers long and slim, such pretty hands he has, his pale skin glistening with your wetness. "What was that?"

"P-please," you beg pathetically as all his motions still abruptly, eyes turning steal as he leans so close that you think your noses might touch. His other hand latches on your hair when your head lolls back down, his grip forcing you to keep your eyes on his indigo ones. The dull pain in your scalp goes straight to your core, and Shinsou can tell by how you clench around his finger.

"That isn't an answer to my question, Y/N." Your name rolls of his tongue so cold, so distant, you find yourself whining at it.

"Y-yes!" You exclaim, hips moving and grinding against his hand to find more friction with yet another cry, "I did- I did, so please!"

Shinsou has to admit.

Having you look at him with wide, watering eyes, face contorted in need of pleasure, your lips trembling as a form of begging- he doesn't think he can hold off much longer.

You feel so tight, even with just a finger, so warm and welcoming that he might be going crazy. Your mouth falls slack; eyes squeezed closed as you focus on the pleasure, silent other than shallow, desperate breathes.

"That's a good girl." Shinsou approves, adding a second finger and closing the gap between your faces to press a kiss on your lips as a reward.

So desperate for affection, you don't hear nor feel his amused laugh as you throw your arms around his neck when he starts to pull back after giving you but a peck, trying to hold him close, pull him into a kiss.

Shinsou shakes his head no, his fingers curling in you as he does so, your back arching off the bed. "Let's not get greedy, pretty girl. Don't worry; I'll take you there- as many times as you want. Okay?"

"Okay." You nod obediently and- fuck, Shinsou feels his dick ache with how hard he is.

"You take my fingers so well." He mutters, almost talking to himself, fascinated by how eager your pussy pulls him in. "Just listen how you gush around my fingers, how slutty your pussy is," Shinsou chuckles, the wet sound of your cunt making you cry out a whine. "Looks how wet you are, so messy, so pretty, wanna make you cum so many times-" He raises his brows when you shake your head 'no'

"Wanna-" you whine, "wanna cum on your cock."

"Please?" You add quickly, giving him the mastered doe-eyes. With the way his fingers sink into the flesh of your thighs, you know you're pushing him till he can't hold back anymore.

"Ah, fuck baby." You moan as his eyes roll back in his head. "How can I say no to you when you ask so nicely?"

You writhe under him as he rubs the swollen head on your pussy first, wetting the tip of his cock with your arousal as you nuzzle your face on his neck to get more of his scent, his skin muffling your moans when he lightly taps your clit.

"If it's too much," Shinsou holds you by the chin to make you look at him, your gaze half-lidded, mouth agape, you looked fucked dumb already. "what were you going to say?"

"Band-bandaids." You half-moan, half speak. Satisfied with the answer, Shinsou can't wait any longer as he's finally pushing himself in you, your cunt pulsing around him-

fuck- so warm, so wet, so soft-

"Holy fuck!" A guttural groan rips from his chest as he feels your strained walls pulse and flutter around him, trying to adjust to his size as he hears your needy cries right next to his ear. It has him losing his mind; Shinsou angles his hips just enough to have you screaming his name, and the feeling of his cock dragging against your pussy, heavy and hot in you, is enough to have you teetering on the edge already.

"'s big!" You whine into his neck, body convulsing with each drag of his cock in you. "So big- you're so big, makes me feel so full." You gasp, unaware of how you bring your hand to your stomach, pressing on the bulge that appears when he pushes in you.

You look so mindlessly fucked out; with your face twisted in pleasure, mouth fallen slack and drool pooling in the corner of your lips, eyes rolling back in your skull as he plunges in and out of you.

"Shinsou- Shinsou, ah, fuck!" You babble, nails digging in his arms to leave angry red crescents. So lost in the pleasure, you're not exactly aware of Shinsou's hands roaming around your face, cupping your jaw, caressing your cheeks, pushing back stray hairs. So cute, so vulnerable for him- he can't wait to make your face wet with tears.

"I'm gonna- I- I'm gonna cum!" You moan, but he knows this already, by the way your back arching off the bed with each deep thrust of his hips, by your pussy clenching even harder on his cock, your hands holding on to him like he's your lifeline.

In a heartbeat, just as you're sure the coil that's been growing in you is going to snap, just as you're about to fall into that bliss- he stops.

A broken sob follows his stillness, a cry ripping itself off your chest at the feeling that was just beyond reach. "Why?" You whine into his chest, hips wiggling to try and feel the same as you did a second ago.

"Shh, it's okay," he coos, voice breathy, more uncollected than he tries to look, purple locks of hair submitting to gravity and falling down, hovering around his face like an indigo halo. "I'll let you come as many times as you want- if you beg."

He raises a brow at you when you squirm under his touch, clamping down on his cock when he growls in your ear, hot breath fanning on your neck. "Beg for it, pretty girl, beg for me to make you cum on my cock- such a hungry slut- beg and I'll give you whatever you want."

You look up at him teary-eyed, your body shaking like a leaf in hungry need, for release, for him, but your lips refuse to atone, your head shaking side to side as a sob leaves your throat.

You can't, you can't beg, but the feeling is irresistible.

"No?" Shinsou voices your silent rebel, and you think the shadows on his face just got a few tones darker.

"You think you have a choice?" His voice low and grave as you feel a pair of hands snake up your body and wrap around your neck, squeezing just the right amount to have your eyes widen with shock, pussy tighten with need but not so much that you're gasping for air. "Nothing but a filthy whore- look at me when I fuck you."

Another squeeze has your eyes rolling back in your head, his filthy words traveling right down to your weeping core. "Now beg."

This time, you don't miss a beat before obeying, pleas falling from your lips along with whimpers of his name, but it's not enough; that you can tell by the dissatisfied click of his tongue. "P-please, sir," you whisper, it makes him move, a hard thrust in your to show praise.

"P-please fuck me-" you add, trying to speak between his occasional deep thrusts, messing with your head. "Show me my- mmh, fuck!- my place!"

As soon as the words are out of your lips, Shinsou goes out of his mind as well. His eyes widen with how your words affect him, an electrifying warmth blooming in the pit of his stomach. "Show you your place?" He growls, and you cry out a moan when he starts thrusting in a ruthless pace, his grip on your neck now suddenly a tad tighter, black spots dancing around in your vision.

"Show you what a slut you are, is that it?"

You're not even comprehending the words he's spewing, the feeling of his cock filling you up has warm tears running down your cheeks, sobs mixed with moans filling the silence other than the sound of skin slapping skin and his low growls.

"Crying? What a little baby, can't even take a cock in you, huh? Then what are you even good for?" Just as he finishes his sentence, the tip of his cock grazes that sweet spot in you, making you cry out a louder sob. "Sh-shinsou, please!"

Hearing you sob out his name like that has his cock twitching in you, your legs wrapped around his waist, legs digging into the small of his back, your nails biting in his shoulders as if he's the only thing holding you up and sane, newer ones filling his skin with each thrust he gifts you. His lidded gaze focuses on your fucked out face, drooling as your mouth falls slack, eyes rolling to the back of your head, face wet with tears you're still shedding. His hand travels from your neck to your jaw, forcing you to look at him so he can lean forward and plant a wet kiss on your lips.

"Fuck yeah- look at you, pretty girl, crying because how good I'm fucking you, huh?"

You nod pathetically, knowing he's waiting for an answer, but a nod is all you can muster with how hazy your mind feels. "More, more- please sir, ah!" Your hands travel from his arms to his back, leaving red, angry stripes on his back as well; one of your hands find a purple lock of hair, taking it between your fingers and hanging on it as hard as you can-

"Ah, shit!" Shinsou shouts as he throws his head up in the air at the dull pain you give him, his cock twitching in you and making you cry out a moan. You're not even aware you're pulling his hair, not aware you're getting him so close to cumming, not aware of anything but his fat cock drilling in you.

"Shit! Baby don't- ah, don't do that or I'm-" He groans, thrusts getting harder, faster-

"You're gonna cum?" He growls in your ear as he feels you clamping harder on his cock, the feeling of you fluttering around him bringing him to your high with you. "Huh? Are you? Answer me." Shinsou's hand grips your hair, pulling it and exposing the skin of your neck for him, open and vulnerable for him to leave marks.

The feeling of his hand in your hair, the kisses he leaves on every sensitive part of your neck, the way his teeth graze and sometimes bite your skin- it's all too much, your body shaking and back arching, you're close- so, so close that-

"I'm cumming- sir, please, I-"

"Cum for me then." Shinsou orders, voice breathy and shaking with the pleasure he's swimming in.

All it takes is for him to lean for another kiss, his tongue sliding in your mouth, and you're falling off the sweet edge, cries getting louder and body shaking with a ripping orgasm, you're clamping down on his cock like crazy, like you won't ever let him go, your dainty hands in his hair and hanging on his locks without care and fuck-

"Give me one more, baby, one more-" Shinsou grunts in your ear, lips grazing the shell as his fingers rub vigorous circles on your clit, "I know you have it in you, come on."

"I- I can't-" You try to speak, but it's all too much, your mind foggy, the tip of your tongue lolling out. "You can," Shinsou growls, orders. "You can and you will."

It's not much after your body convulses with yet another orgasm, hanging on Shinsou as he keeps fucking into you, and you know he's close.

"Come in me!" Your voice cries out to the man; you have your arms thrown around his neck, pulling him to yourself, want to be closer, closer, closer- "Please- come in me! I want to feel you- ah!"

You gasp as he gives you few last pumps, overstimulation making you flinch. Shinsou comes with a groan, teeth sinking into the conjunction of your neck and shoulders and causing you to cry out in pleasure mixes with a tint of pain.

Your eyes are falling as he pulls you to himself, closing his arms around you and holding you against his chest. You stay like that for a while, both too tired to even ask each other how you're doing. He finally slips out of your abused cunt, standing up to glance at you worriedly when you wince. "Sorry."

"How are you feeling?" You hear him grumble as he shuffles through the drawers, wetting the clean towel he pulled out from there. When he comes back, you also notice the bottle of medicine he has in his hands.

"Here, take this." He gives you the medicine and a cup of water, leaning towards you hesitantly. "Should I?" He brings the towel towards the between of your legs, but still keeps a distance.

When you nod, his soft touch ushers your legs to part. He grimaces when you wince at the contact with the towel, even when his touch is so light, but you endure it.

"I should help you out with those." You mutter, half-embarrassed as you inspect the angry red lines adorning his back and arms. His chest is littered with lovebites and marks you don't even remember leaving, and he chuckles when he drops his gaze to look for himself, as well.

"It's okay; you should rest." He laughs. "I'll take care of it later."

You nod, but you still feel his gaze on you as you push yourself deeper in the sheets, mind swimming in thoughts of-

"What are you going to do now?" Shinsou voices, and you notice he's back in his boxers and a shirt, hair in a little more shape. You blink a few times, not knowing how to answer, not knowing the answer, hands fisting the sheets in tight balls.

"I first wanted to go find Aizawa." You shrug, rubbing your eyes. "Before I came here, I mean."

He huffs out a surprised laugh, glancing at you with his brows raised. "That's a first." He mutters. "What's the occasion?"

A smile sneaks its way on your lips as you give him an unfazed shrug. "You think I'll tell you? Maybe I'll let you hear what it is when you take me to him."

Shinsou stays still for a second or so, the predatory glint he had a few minutes ago appearing once again in his indigo eyes. "My silly little baby," You feel two of his fingers graze the underside of your chin, tilting your gaze to meet his. "I thought we already agreed that I can make you do anything I say." You feel his breath on your lips, leaning to close the gape.

"Or should I teach you one more time?"

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tangledinmdzs · 3 years

Note

Hello! If it's ok, can I ask for some headcanons about Juniors when they accidentally touch a headband (head ribbon?? how is it called?) Of their crush from a Lan sect? Btw, I looooove this blog (and you)! And I really like the way you edit your texts, idk just your emphasis of this little emotional parts in cursive and this ?indent? (once again Idk what it's called, English isn't my first language, I'm sorry) adds to the atmosphere so much, in my opinion. Anyway, love you 💗

hi friend!

ahh, thank you for your all compliments! making me feel all the fluffiness on the inside! and i’m so glad that you’ve taken a liking to the text editing. :) i’ve been working around and playing with that and finally just settled on the format now. thank you so much!

and such a cute request for our lovely Lan Juniors, i would love to write it for you!

cheers~

♥*♡∞:｡.｡　　｡.｡:∞♡*♥

Lan Sizhui

“it’s-”

you barely have time to finish your sentence when Sizhui spins around, his hand latching onto his forehead ribbon that was falling off

you both stare at each other with wide eyes

you didn’t mean to catch onto the end of the ribbon like you did, but it had fallen

“it-it was falling, i didn’t mean to-” you try to explain and watch as Sizhui’s flicker between your hand that’s holding on the end of his forehead ribbon and his own end

you widen your eyes at the insinuation,

you release your end, hand drawing back as if burned

“i’m so so so so sorry, Sizhui, I’m really sorry” you apologize profusely because it was inappropriate and wrong and it was a responsibility-

“you’re responsible,”

you widen your eyes and look up to him, confused, scared

“what?” you breathe out, because you both don’t know each other really well and also what? how were you supposed to be responsible for him???-

“h-how can i? why, i mean, what?” you ask in complete shock and Sizhui holds his forehead ribbon in his hand, steps close to you

you move back as he moves close, until your back suddenly hits the tree trunk that you didn’t see before

“you’re responsible now,” Sizhui tells you, when you can’t move back any more

you blink at him, wondering what the fate you had just bought to yourself

Lan Jingyi

“ah, ”

Jingyi looks back at the sound of your voice, eyes widening at your hand on his personal box

“y/n! that’s my-”

you, being the curious friend that you are, had already taken out the folded forehead ribbon without ask, taking in the sight of it in your hand

it was your first time at the Lan Gusu Sect, and your sect did not share the same traditions that they upheld

so you didn’t know,

“wow, this design is so beautiful,” you note, finger gently running over the cool metal of the carved out clouds

before you can get a better look, the forehead ribbon is ripped from your hands

you look up immediately at Lan Jingyi, his face a tomato red, his eyes a darker shade than the carefree easy spirit that had welcomed you and your sect at your stay here only a few hours ago,

“Jingyi,” you call to him, but he has already stomped away

he’s more than embarrassed and he can’t bring it in himself to tell you what the meaning of your touch holds in his clan

because would you dare to be the first?

be the only one for him?

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lunarflux · 3 years

Text

hwang hyunjin x reader

genre — angst!au

hookup to lover

suggested background music: (click the x)

note: i am so so sorry idk what happened with this one. i was listening to one song, and as my playlist changed, the storyline changed so i did a lot of tweaking to keep with the mood. i did my best to characterize a backstory for the mc x hyunjin lol i like to write about these "moments" that let the reader continue the story on their own, so i hope this is okay??

Hot water hit the back of your neck before trickling down the curves of your back.

No music, no distractions, but here in the steam, enveloped in a warmth akin to his, these were the only thoughts, combing through the air like water under lily pads.

Watching the remnants of bubbles sliding down your legs and onto the porcelain, you sighed through the fog.

He seemed to be all you could think of lately.

You two had known each other for years. Childhood dreams came and went, and the years spent apart from the other seemed like nothing. It was like you two always found your way back. Between the heartbreaks, he'd be there. After the storm was over, he'd be there like a flower waiting for sunlight.

After your first breakup, he appeared like the first night of pleasant dreams after a year of nightmares. Hyunjin was just always there until he wasn't. The spaces in between the time you shared were always spent with other people, almost like you two didn't know how to talk when someone else was around. The world you built was only made for him.

How many more days until your little daydream flitted away like the memories of yesterday morning? You couldn't remember lunch, but you remembered dinner and the after, sitting beside him as his eyes slowly closed, his temple hitting your shoulder.

You didn't dare remind him that he fell asleep intertwined with you in his sheets before slipping out in the morning.

The routine of falling in love with a romantic who wasn't yet ready for you became your weeknights, and it crept into the weekend. Sleeping next to your faux lover, using Monday mornings to figure out what exactly you two were - these were your weeks, and it continued throughout the years.

He wasn't your boyfriend - no, you coiled together, you spoke in a language made for your tongues alone, and when the night fell, all you could see were stars and the moonlight resting on his pillow, ever so intimately resting on his cheeks.

It was always a dreaded question.

What are we?

You never wanted to ask. The question frightened you - you couldn't imagine how much it terrified him. The thought of solidifying what you were to him seemed all too intimidating.

Although.

Maybe I do love him.

And again.

Do I love him?

Saying it out loud was the scariest part. Once it was said out loud, you couldn't take it back. It was there. It was truth. It was matter floating through the air, and it drifted away like a kite to the clouds.

Stepping out of the shower, the moments slowly came back.

Quietly locking his door with the spare key he left under the mat. Catching a taxi back to your small apartment. Falling asleep again on the couch before waking up just as the sun hit the horizon. Washing away the remnants of his scent - though, you could swear it was everywhere - in your hair, on your clothes, forever dancing over your skin like he could never be scrubbed away.

(1 new message - Hyunjin)

Why'd you leave?

You hated it when he did this. You hated him. And you loved him. You hated how he would call, and you couldn't resist saying yes. You hated how he'd say he could only fall asleep when it was next to you. You hated the way he looked at you.

You swore he looked at you like he loved you.

Tossing your phone back onto you bed, you went through the rest of your morning, hoping your next cup of coffee would bring the life back into your face.

Hyunjin always managed to reappear in your life whenever you finally forgot about him. It was like he was waiting. He only wanted you when you didn't belong to anyone else, and yet he never did enough to make you his.

Annoyed.

Aggravated.

Every heated emotion you could feel would course through your veins when you thought about him, yet you couldn't bring yourself to say no.

And you were only ever like that with him.

He knocked on your door at 3pm.

"Why'd you leave?" He recited straight from his text message, still left with no response on your phone.

You shrugged, letting him walk into your apartment without giving him an answer.

"Did I do something?" He grabbed your hand.

It was like something snapped. The button no one dared to press was suddenly slammed into, and everything came spilling out.

"Why do we only do this when you know I've moved on?" You said, spite glossing over your words almost like you wanted it to hurt. "You knew - you knew I'd finally gotten over my ex, and you called, like it was a routine, you knew I wasn't attached anymore. Why do we still do this?"

Hyunjin's grip on your hand was still steady. "I don't know what you want."

"Honestly, I don't either. Something... not this."

He always pulled you in so effortlessly. When Hyunjin hugged you, he would hold your face in his chest like he wanted you to hear his heart beating. He would nuzzle his face into your neck. It was never forceful, but it kept you still.

You leaned way, keeping him at a small distance. This was the first time he'd ever really seen you bare - no makeup, no filter, no effort to prove you were okay being his "maybe".

How many times can you fall in love with one person?

"Tell me what you want." Hyunjin spoke quietly.

He'd never had problems telling you how he felt about the others, girls who came and went. Superficial relationships that would be dedicated for a month and then no more.

"Tell me what to do - just talk to me."

"That's not something we do." You hissed. "We don't talk - we fuck, and you talk. About your hookups, your relationships, you just go on like it doesn't bother me." Backing away to the wall, you could feel your cheeks burn. "I hate it."

"Do you hate me?"

"Maybe I do." You nodded, you head hanging down. "I hate being this - this thing - this space you use when you need someone. I don't want to be the space between moments - I don't want to be the 'pause' between the girls you fall in love with"

Hyunjin almost looked satisfied with your response. This was the first time you'd gotten angry with him, and he knew it. He knew you held your tongue around him. He wasn't blind. He just wanted you to expose yourself to him. The intimacy was a step through the door, but it wasn't enough to make it home.

"I just - I want -"

Grabbing your shoulders firmly, Hyunjin made you look up at him, tears gripping your eyelashes.

"What do you want?"

The look in his eyes was the look of clarity. He asked this same question, but he had his own answer.

A small pur of a sigh, the motion letting the tears fall one by one. "I don't want to see you with anyone else."

He let you cry for a moment until your breaths were steady again. Stroking your cheek with his thumb, he kissed your forehead. His breath moved through your hair.

"I just want you to stay here." You whispered.

"Okay." He leaned into you, his hands on either side of the wall behind you. "I'll stay."

"But -"

"Whatever you want." Hyunjin's eyes were so close. "I'll stay here forever if you want me to."

"I don't understand."

"If I asked you to be with me when we first met, I thought you'd feel unfulfilled. We were so young, and we hadn't lived our lives yet. I would've been content to be with you until you said you didn't want me anymore. I wanted you to live and be done wandering until you were ready to just be mine and no one else's. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have assumed."

The vague childhood jokes Hyunjin used to play on you began to replay themselves behind his words. The times he'd laugh and say "you should date him" - you hated it, but you understood.

"I had to learn how to love other people before I could love you - properly."

He loves me?

"That was the only kind of love you deserved - a proper, complete love. I've done what I needed to do. I made my mistakes, and I took the hard way out of my problems." Hyunjin kissed you sweetly, his lips moving slowly and carefully before pulling away. "I wanted to grow up, so I could love you properly." He rested his forehead on yours, his nose brushing against yours.

His hands gripped your hips firmly before he backed away, letting you see his face clearly.

"Are you ready for me?"

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jack-kellys · 3 years

Note

how about !! "i'm sure you have a reason for all of your rage" ?? might be a little long for a fic title but i think it would be an interesting one 👀

(also! it's from a song called "atom" by the sonder bombs if you're interested!!)

i'd love to see what you'd come up with for it !! i think more newsies should Feel Big Emotions

ayo keep the fic titles comin lads

this actually like sent me back two years and i immediately went: albert dasilva.

fuck dude. in this we’d follow al’s mental health spiral through race’s pov, lacking the reason for albert’s onslaught of anger. albert just seems to suddenly snap at him, or ignore him for a few days, or have an outburst. race catches him crying one afternoon, which haunts him more than anything else. through it, race is so devastatingly concerned for his. for his al (cause idk if this would be romantic or not), wondering why the sarcastic wisecracker he was so familiar with and cared so much about was slipping through unseen cracks.

the POV shifts via a confrontation between al and race, and through it, it flashes back to the moments we saw with race, but now we’re in al’s head. we got context now lads, we got a secret lead-up that makes sense of al’s decline. his dad’s in the hospital, and as the eldest of his brothers, responsibilities are lining onto his shoulders faster than he can comprehend. He’s stressed, he’s scared, and his likable humorous mean-streak has devolved into something much nastier in the process.

al gets it all out in this fight with race, and race just listens once his friend really starts going. he listens, and nods, and apologizes. they’re friends, after all, and all race needed was context. now he can help al, properly be at his side to assist, as he always has!

#THIS IS AN OG ASK NGL…. albert being filled dangerously so with rage is just>#secondary idea would be jack driving himself up a wall for sure though i like..#i KNOW it’s kind of ooc but sometimes i just want jack to be mean. and biting. and bitter. and lose that fight with himself #yk #what happens when the dream is dead and gone. jack found a new one ok but like what if he didn’t LMAO like #nihilistic jack being shoved into optimism he can only wish he still had and getting snappy and MEAN about it.. pls🤌🏼🤌🏼🤌🏼#anyway thank you jaaaaac ♥️#mutuals #fizz answers #fizz wants to write #ralbert #A TAG I HAVE SORELY MISSED #racetrack higgins #albert dasilva #jack kelly #bc my tags are good

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syuga-s · 3 years

Text

The Last Time

w.c 4.3k

pairing. Jooheon x gn!reader

genre. angst, a little fluff maybe, idk how to classify it but it's my take on relationships in real life(?)

a/n. (warnings) I throw some curses here and there, mention of the word "sex" once, tried to make it as gender-neutral as possible, I could really use some help about t/w, feedback is more than welcome, hope you like the fic 🧍‍♀️

Once again you were at the same bar. With the same friends. Same music. Same drinks. It's safe to say that nothing's changed in here but you.

For some reason, you were awfully quiet tonight. Everyone was away from the table by now. All of them talking and dancing in groups.

You were regretting saying yes to going out the very moment Jasmine was at your front door. But your best friend really wanted to get you out of your house.

The thing is you weren’t going to be alone, all of your friends were tagging along. I guess I need to suck it up, maybe I could have fun, despite him.

And you really tried, there was no need to make a scene anymore. All of your friends have had their fair share of nights seeing you 'talk' with him and making things awkward for everyone. It's been a while, though. You haven't seen him in exactly 2 years.

How do I explain this? There's no resentment anymore, no hate for what happened between you. But when there's a choice between spending your Friday night at the same place as him or staying at home? Well...

But tonight was clearly different. Something (Jasmine) had dragged you here and to be quite honest, it hasn’t been half bad yet. Jasmine kept waiting for you to get up from your chair to come and chat with Jackson and Changkyun. Her all-time crush and his best friend.

"In a sec!! Just let me finish this drink!" You said while you showed her your glass. She quickly nodded and turned to keep talking with those two. You have to remember to thank them later for keeping her entertained because if it weren't for them cracking jokes every single second, she wouldn't have let you off the hook that easily.

Meanwhile, you decided to get a little lost in your head. Laughing to yourself because you were feeling like having a main character moment. Being the only one sat down in a place full of people. The mysterious persona drinking by themselves.

But that didn't last long.

"Mind if I sit here?" You shook your head. He put his drink next to yours and asked, "How are you?" And it somehow felt like you couldn’t have avoided this exact situation.

You released a breath that you didn't even know you were holding. "I'm sitting Jooheon, drinking… existing, you?" He forced himself to smile. Trying to hide the fact that he was still feeling uneasy around you. Nonetheless, showing you the dimples that you used to love so much.

“I can see that”, he paused, "it's been a lot since I last saw you, you look different".

You hummed softly, finally making eye contact with him. "So you expected for me to look the same?" You surely weren't going to pass up the opportunity to be passive-aggressive to him.

It still makes you happy to know that he has never minded this side of you.

"I'm teasing, I guess we both look different, it's been what? Two years?"

"I'm not sure, but it feels like a lot" He took a sip of his drink and started to fidget with the glass. Maybe you're not the only one that's changed after all.

In the two years, you were together, you never saw him like this. But let's remember the fact that you never fully knew him back then. It just feels weird to see him this anxious. Especially with you.

"I've wanted to reach out to you for a while now," You frowned at his words. "Guess I lacked a little courage" He let out an airy laugh. "I really want to talk to you".

Now it was your turn to feel tense. What is this supposed to mean? How long has he been wanting to talk? And talk about what?

You tilted your head and opened your mouth to ask him all this, but he didn't give you the chance to get the words out.

"Before you say something, please believe me I just wanna talk", "but not in here”.

"Alright then, where do you suggest we ‘talk’ Jooheon?” He took his phone out to check the time. 10:44 p.m. He pursed his lips and said, more like hesitating, "I could walk you home?"

You stared off into your group of friends. This was going to make their night interesting. Seeing you two go together again, just like all those times before.

Jooheon's been waiting for this since he saw on your social media that you were leaving the city. And Jasmine took care of letting him know that you would be coming back in about 6 months.

That was a year ago. More than 365 days waiting to be in the same room with you. Praying that you would let him talk to you. Not that you would reject him. But he was scared, he was perfectly aware he messed up everything.

As you were both saying goodbyes to your friends, you started to think about how everything had ended between you two.

You know what? Yes, maybe I was wrong in ghosting him but after all, I don't owe him anything. Just like he threw me out of his life two years ago. We didn't work out, he never communicated with me. He didn't choose me back. I just had to watch him get rid of me, no explanations, no nothing. And I find it really hard to believe that he's been dying to talk to me. What could be so important that he wants to have a proper conversation? How will I explain to him that I stopped replying for no particular reason? That I just realized that we weren't good together, and I had to let go of him? Should I tell him that no matter my hard feelings, I still thought about him constantly?

You had left each other in the cold back then.

He called your name, and you snapped back to reality. Didn't even realize you were already outside of the bar when he softly asked you, "aren't you cold?"

You smirked and told him "Well yeah, walking back home in this weather wasn't in my plans dummy, but I didn't bring a jacket though".

He used to be so attentive to you. One of the other things you used to love about him. Always concerned about you.

He simply put his jacket around you and started walking before you could complain about something as simple as this. Like you always did.

It feels nice to know that someone in this world knows you to this extent. The way you’ll react to simple things. How can you still love someone despite knowing that you don’t work together?

You realized he still has this jacket. It's the same one he gave me the first night we spent together. Why do I have to remember this now? Not fair. Maybe he wore it on purpose.

You gave a little run to catch him. Now that you were by his side, you were getting impatient, "Can you please start talking? I'm intrigued by all your seriousness".

You were kind of hating this feeling. Everything about him felt familiar. Suddenly, you wanted to cling your arm to his but thought twice about it.

He chuckled. "Well it's not super serious, I want us to have a nice conversation, you know?" You snorted at this, what does a nice talk mean?

"I can be nice, as long as you tell me WHAT you wanna talk about…", "come on Jooheon, just get to the point".

"Okay!! OKAY… I-" he took a deep breath and continued, "First of all, I want to apologize to you for everything, then I want us to talk about what happened between us if that's okay with you?"

You'd be lying if you didn't say that you wanted this to happen since you drew apart the first time. You always dreamt of having an adult conversation with him.

But the dream left your mind bit by bit. Just like your heart got itself back together after he left you, piece by piece.

Overwhelmed, you could only stare straight ahead into the street. He called your name again. Now your eyes were on his, and you could see his concerns. How his mind was going miles per hour, just like yours.

"I want to apologize too,” you smiled and finally let yourself link arms with him. “It’s gonna take us a while, isn’t it?”.

The walk to your apartment took around 15 minutes. The words you exchanged with Jooheon were kept to a minimum. You weren’t gonna get into the heavy stuff right there in the street.

When you finally arrived, you gave him back his jacket. It was gonna get uncomfortable to talk with him with a piece of clothing that made you remember too much.

“Want something to drink? I have a beer, wine, you name it”. He sat on your couch while you searched for something non-alcoholic in your little fridge. “A beer would be okay”.

You got yourself some water. Otherwise, your head would be fuzzy, and wouldn’t be able to tell him all you’ve had on your mind for years.

You handed him the bottle, and you took your seat on the carpet. Your mind wandered off to the last time he was in here.

When he told you goodnight and planted a soft kiss on your lips like he always did. You knew it wasn’t a simple ‘good night’, for you.

You remembered how your eyes followed him until he closed the door of your apartment.

He took a swig of his drink and by the time he put the bottle on your little coffee table, it made you realize he was sitting right there, in front of you.

Finally, gathering the courage to start telling you what was on his mind. “I never thought I’d get the chance to talk to you again”.

I didn’t think so, either. We both fucked up multiple times.

──────────────────────

You were never a couple. After 5 years, you never understood what had lacked between you. The desire was there. Now and then you had your moments of happiness. Usually on the weekends.

When you met, you weren’t looking for love or a serious relationship. At least one of you.

Jooheon was free, like the wind or like a bird. He flew back and forth and once in a while he needed to land somewhere for a while. Every so often he sought another fire, another bed, other arms that weren’t yours.

The time came when he made you feel a million things inside. Overwhelmed with words and emotions, mostly love. But also turmoil and maybe desperation.

It made you happy that he made you feel so much after being empty for months. You felt different with him. It was the kind of love you didn’t know you had in you. Didn’t even think it was possible to express about someone like this. Until him.

You didn’t need anyone else. You just needed Jooheon. Not only that, but you didn’t care for how long your love would last because you believed that the meaning of the word love was what you had built together.

A few hours together. Every so often the whole night.

But when the morning came, the nightmare started to take form. Texts at inappropriate hours, and even unanswered messages.

You started thinking that you didn’t know better. You started feeling insecure. Replaceable. Maybe he knows better than to be with me.

Desperate to know what you had. But afraid that you would ruin everything with the words “What are we?”.

Tried to convince yourself that all of this was okay. That it was a good thing that you were going slow, giving him the chance to open up to you.

Months kept passing and your trust in him was running thin. He made you feel weird on the daily. Wondering if he was seeing someone else. If he danced with someone tonight. Had they kissed? Is he having sex with someone who isn’t me? What if he’s tired of me?

You wanted to be with him, but It was starting to hurt.

I hate that when I try to get myself to think that I don’t like you anymore… you do these little things that make me love you.

When you were together, he treated you like there was no one else for him. His hand was always wrapped up in yours. Talking until dawn, about college, his family, and your relationship. Those times, you couldn’t lie to yourself about your feelings.

He was the only face you could see in the world. The only guy you’ve ever wanted to keep around. But how did we get to this point?

The day you told him you were starting to fall in love with him, all he could reply was, “I don’t know what to say, I never thought you would be in love with me”.

“That’s all you have to say?”

“Well what do you want me to say? You took me by surprise”.

“You could tell me how you feel. I’m not expecting for you to tell me you love me back, I-“

There’s no return now, you have to keep talking.

“I’m just tired of not knowing what’s in your head, I’m not sure if you want to have something with me anymore, it’s okay if you don’t so, just be honest with me”.

“I like you”. You stayed quiet after hearing this, urging him to tell you more than just three words.

“I mean, of course, I’m attracted to you”.

At that moment, you liked what you heard. But the more you thought about it, you realized that he didn’t actually care for you, or loved you. Maybe that was a greedy thought from you. Maybe you expected too much.

You were angry but mostly angry at yourself.

Why are you still waiting for him? It's been years and nothing has happened between you. Nothing ever will at this point.

You ended up telling him not to bother you again, that if this was his way of ‘loving’ you, you were better off without it.

But that was a lie, you longed for your phone to show his name, even if it was at 5 A.M. Still thinking that there was no other way to love someone.

Unable to put an end to it, months kept passing and nothing changed between you. Jooheon had many others, and you only had him.

You loved spending nights like this by his side, watching him sleep, wondering for hours about you two. Unable to explain how you could love him this much.

Maybe he did love you, but you can’t handle this kind of love anymore. It’s better for both of you to end this, whatever it was because it's driving you crazy. And you meant it this time.

Jooheon told you goodnight and planted a soft kiss on your lips like he always did.

You knew it wasn’t a simple ‘good night’ for you, this was the last time you were gonna let him in. Your eyes followed him until he closed the door of your apartment. Fighting back your tears while softly saying to yourself, “I’m always going to love you…”.

The texts at 5 A.M. came again, but this time there was no answer. Jooheon started calling and sending texts for days, but you didn’t reply. All your efforts in disappearing from him on social media weren’t stopping him.

He met someone else, yet the texts wouldn’t stop. Until one day they did.

Now and then your curiosity would get the best of you and you would see his Instagram stories with her. An older girl you had met once. They were supposed to be friends.

You wanted to avoid comparing yourself to her but, he never posted something with you. It’s a dumb thing to worry about, but it’s one of those things that sometimes matter.

You tried to understand the whole situation. Accept the fact that you two weren’t meant to be. That he didn’t see a future with you.

Your days stopped revolving around him. You focused your time on getting your degree, learning another language, going out with your friends. Even tried meeting new people.

There were a few here and there. No one was enough for you.

Your ideas of love and relationships were different now. You gave another meaning to the word love. You wanted to find someone who would love you and take care of you. A quiet kind of love, real love.

What you had with Jooheon, was something you never wanted to experience again. Days went by, even months until you saw each other once more; for the first time in Jooheon’s life, he felt a knot in his stomach, he knew he lost you, for good this time.

Months passed and Jooheon left his girlfriend. He now felt different because he looked for you in everyone, yet he couldn’t find you, and he felt empty.

He cursed himself a thousand times for not knowing how to appreciate you and the love you gave him for two whole years. Tears finally fell from his eyes, he couldn’t believe he was crying for someone, crying for love, crying for you.

He took his phone out, swallowed hard, and started typing another text.

“I miss you, and I need you with me now and always, I never thought I would say this, but I’m not happy without you. Maybe I should’ve loved you less and loved you better, I just want you to know that I’ll always be waiting for you my sweet y/n…”

But the message was never delivered. You had changed your number.

It made sense that you would do that someday. It’s been too long, but this didn’t stop him from sending you texts in the middle of the night. When he felt the overwhelming need to have his arms wrapped around you.

──────────────────────

I still love you

(9:05 p.m.)

no, I don’t

(9:06 p.m.)

I’m confused why did this happen

(2:26 a.m.)

I want you to be happy, if this is what it takes then I’m okay with it. be happy. for me. please.

(10:45 a.m.)

I kind of hate you for changing your number

(8:57 p.m.)

I’m sorry

(1:43 a.m.)

maybe if I wasn’t so fucked up this wouldn’t have happened

(3:37 a.m.)

why can’t things be like they were before

(10:13 a.m.)

please come back to me. I need you. You need me

(1:58 a.m.)

I still want you

(4:06 a.m.)

──────────────────────

The day you left town was the day he swore to himself to try his best to get another chance to talk to you, just once more. To make things right, not caring anymore about his pride. He just wanted to let you know everything he didn’t say when you were by his side.

That he was sorry that it took him too long to acknowledge he was wrong. That he knew he was a little too late and wishes that he could say something more meaningful than a simple “I want you back”.

──────────────────────

“I wonder why” You smirked at him.

The more you kept making eye contact, the more you realized you didn’t feel any kind of resentment anymore. You both had grown, and while you didn’t actually need this kind of closure, you figured this was the healthiest moment to do so.

His eyes were avoiding you now, his smile was still there, but you could tell he lost a bit of his confidence. “Okay, so I’m gonna talk first, please just hear me out. I want to rip the band-aid,” He said with a forced laugh.

“I don’t know why I could never tell you that love scares me. That it scares me to be attached to someone”. His tone was soft now.

“I still play in my head the day you told me you were falling in love with me. I couldn’t bring myself to tell you not to tell me those things because you could have changed your mind any moment”.

“I never told you how I felt one of the many nights you spent with me. You were stroking my hair and I seriously felt like crying because I was fucking scared”.

“I was scared to lose you”.

“I’m sorry because I know I made you think I didn’t want you for something serious. I’m sorry for being immature”.

“I look at you now, and I’m happy to get to see you like this. You’re still everything I’ve ever wished for and more. You need to know that nothing compares to you”.

“And believe me, I don’t expect you to take my words as a way of asking you for another chance, I know I don’t deserve it… but I would really love it if you could let me show you I could love you better this time”.

You never imagined these words coming out of his mouth. Couldn’t believe how he was looking at you. Hopeful but understanding at your loss for words.

“Can I ask you one last thing?” His voice was barely audible, but you nodded at him.

“Well, maybe it’s not an actual question, but I’d like to know why you stopped talking to me”.

“Look Jooheon, I don’t know how everything I wanna say will come out, so please bear with me”.

You didn’t know where to start, either.

There were so many things to be said that you were getting nervous to start talking. Because once you opened your mouth, you didn’t know if you would be able to piece everything together.

“When everything ended I really wanted to hate you, everyone around me hated you,” you admitted to him, “except for me and I hated that”.

“I knew that all I could be able to do was cut you from my life, so I just decided to stop talking to you”.

It may sound harsh, but it’s the truth. “I admit it was a poor way of handling things, and I’m sorry for that”.

You’ve always been scared of having this type of conversation.

You let out a sigh because you never thought that the following words were gonna come out of your mouth, ever.

“I’ve only been in love once in my life, and that was when I was with you”.

“It used to frustrate me that I wasn’t able to make it work with anyone after you. I couldn’t help but compare everyone to you”.

“I swore to myself that I never wanted to go through the same thing we had, maybe because those memories are yours and I don't want anyone else messing that up, you made me feel so safe, I felt alive with you, nothing could stop me when I had you”.   “You've been the only one I've ever wanted to see every day, no matter the hour or how busy I was, I truly wanted everything with you”.

You hadn’t noticed how he had been looking at you this entire time. He couldn’t believe that you used to feel that way about him. Still couldn’t wrap his head around hearing you say how you loved him.

You quickly wiped a tiny little tear that escaped your eye, hoping we wouldn’t notice. But he did.

You let out a nervous laugh and said, “I’m not sad, I swear, It’s just that I never thought I would say all this out loud, especially to you”.

“You don't know how many times I wanted to call you, run to you”.

“Last year before I left I wanted to see you, I kept trying to convince myself that It didn't have to mean anything, that I was just desperate for any physical touch, but from time to time, I wonder if what I really needed was just you”.

He didn’t say anything. So you just said his name out loud. “Jooheon…” Followed by a long pause.

“I feel so different now”.

“When I was far away from you, I realized that I need someone who isn’t absent when it comes to me, someone that isn’t a ghost in my life”.

While you were talking, you were watching his every move and how he couldn’t stop playing with his rings. You’re still not used to seeing him act like this.

“At this point, I want someone who will take care of me, that makes me feel safe. Someone who wants to be with me because they love me, and they love to have me next to them. I’m beyond only spending the night over, I want whole days”.

You finally got up from the floor and sat next to Jooheon. Facing him, making him do the same. He kept looking at you for a whole minute but it felt like hours.

You didn’t know what to do after his following words.

“What I realized with being away from you is that I was pushing away what I’ve always wanted. I wasn’t confident that I could meet you where you were. I felt it would be better not to waste your time back then, but that was then, and this is now…”

You kept looking at each other a little too long. Both realizing you didn't need words anymore. The love was still there.

#monsta x #jooheon #joohoney #jooheon imagines #jooheon oneshot #jooheon monsta x #jooheon angst #jooheon fluff #monsta x fanfic #jooheon fanfic #monsta x fluff #monsta x angst

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vics-writes · 3 years

Text

I found this on wattpad so here we are

Square filled: Fake dating/married

Summary: For a mission Sam and Bucky have to go undercover and because of some misunderstandings the two are now soon to be Mr. and Mr. Wilson to their target.

or two dumbasses pining for each other while oblivious to the other feelings

Warnings: Light Swearing, mention of death, blood, injuries

Disclaimer: this one is mostly fluff because I need it in my life, idk about the others.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

-DO-

"How do you fuck up so bad?!" Sam groaned when Bucky slammed the door open questioning him.

"I panicked okay? We weren't supposed to know each other! I didn't exactly imagine that you would be caught in the crossfire!" every bit of anger Bucky felt crumbled down when Sam stood in front of him.

He wasn't crying but his tear stained cheeks suggested otherwise; Bucky wanted to ask, but he bit back the question as soon as it popped into his head. Sam wouldn't tell him, why should he?

The room fell silent as Sam sat back on the bed they now had to share. Somehow it felt wrong for Bucky to sit next to him so he sat on the ground; he could have easily went to sit on the couch on the opposite side of the room, but he didn't want to be too far away.

With the shield still in Walker possession Sam was growing increasingly frustrated and he knew it was his fault. And with the Flag Smashers still on the loose Sam was over the edge.

"You didn't get hurt did you?" Sam broke the silence glancing down at him and the super soldier just shook his head. He was going to say something else when Sam's phone started to ring.

"Sharon" Bucky nodded towards the other while he answered and put him on speaker. "We're both here" They heard a chuckle on the other side and they both knew that call had nothing to do with the mission, or at least nothing serious.

"So, soon to be Mr. and Mr. Wilson.." The woman started being cut off by a laugh, most likely Joaquin's. Sam groaned clearly contemplating if it was worth throwing the phone out of the window.

"I'm not wearing an earpiece ever again! It's your fault!" Bucky stared at Sam with confusion, he had lost his in the crossfire so he hadn't heard the men's voices while Sam tried to explain how they knew each other.

"What did I do?!" Growing rapidly frustrated at the laughter of his teammates Sam got up and left the room. "He's left" Bucky said when Sharon called for him.

"It is our fault" Torres noted after a while that all of them stayed silent. Bucky didn't even have to ask why he had said it when Sharon answered "I didn't think he would really say it!"

"What?" confusion clear in Bucky's voice that only grew when Torres and Sharon resumed their laugh. "I suggested the fianceé thing, but I was kidding!" Torres said in between chuckles.

Bucky hung up the phone on the two laughing and got up to go look for Sam, he found him in the hotel's garden looking down at some yellow flowers.

Ignoring how hard his heart started to pound in his chest he got closer deciding to scare the man when he heard Sam talk.

"Hey bud" He saw Sam extend an hand towards the flowers. Picking up a little bird. Bucky couldn't help the smile that crept on his face.

"Mr. Wilson, Mr. Barnes!" the voice of their target startled them both Bucky promptly turned around realizing he didn't have gloves on, therefore they were in deep shit.

Sam realized too so he swiftly went to stand next to Bucky, sliding an arm around his waist, allowing him to hide his metal hand behind the other's back. They eyed each other and for a moment Sam was taken aback by the way Bucky smiled at him.

It was a rare sight, Bucky so close to him, smiling lightly. Sam chest felt lighter than it had in a while and he felt his hand hold on the man waist a little closer.

"We're good thank you! The room is amazing!" Sam hadn't realized the conversation had went on, too focused on the man next to him. And it didn't help Bucky feeling Sam breath tickle his neck.

The conversation slowly died down and the target left the two of them alone soon enough. The moment he was out of sight both almost jumped away from each other, redness on both their faces and a strange coldness took over them in the place the other's body was pressed against theirs.

"Samuel, James" Zemo passed them with a sly grin and Sam just barely acknowledged him with a nod. "I think he didn't understand the 'undercover means we don't know each other' thing" Bucky tried to lift the tension between him and his partner.

"I think that fucker just likes to mess with us" Sam replied, a little smirk tugging at his lips as he said that.

"We need a story, and a convincing one. We can't risk Mr. White catching us in the lie" Bucky hummed before starting to get back to their room but he stopped as soon as he realized Sam had knelt in front of the flower from before and had picked up the bird again.

"What are you doing?" Sam showed him the little bird and then lifted its wing, "This little guy is hurt, so I'm taking it back to our room"

Bucky glanced at the bird and then back at his partner in astonishment as he passed him going back to their room, in the middle of a potentially deadly mission Sam cared about a bird with a broken wing.

I guess that's what you get when you work with the most caring human being in the universe.

"So we met around seven years ago because of work" Sam started reading the things they had come up with.

"And you fell in love with me the first time you saw me" Bucky joked from where he was sitting upside down on the couch. "I'm pretty sure it was the other way around, Jamie" Sam held his gaze and before they knew it they were having yet another staring contest.

Bucky noted to himself to not let that happen again, because as stubborn as he was keeping up with Sam was starting to get difficult since every time he looked into the man's eyes he felt the urge to get closer and just do something.

"I wouldn't know I wasn't exactly in the right state of mind for love, you know?" he kept the joke beaming when he was met by a soft chuckle. "Well, you basically jumped on my car, so I guess it was love at first sight for you" Bucky shook his head smirking. "The fact that you snatched the steering wheel out of the car I was driving from my hands is completely irrelevant" Sam muttered trying to hold back a laugh when he was met with a really confused and really surprised Bucky.

"I did what?!" Sam burst out laughing loudly and basically rolled down the couch while Bucky grew flustered.

When night came they had a seemingly plausible story about how and when they met and how their relationship developed through the years.

So they were ready to answer the questions that obviously targeted them during dinner. Mr. White seemed really interested in their story and asked a lot of questions but neither of them really thought anything of it. The man was known for being some kind of hermit who lived away from technology and therefore he should have know nothing about them.

"You really seem to love each other dearly" The man commented at some point causing both of them to blush vigorously, Sam was the one to answer with a firm yes taking Bucky's hand from the table and interweaving their fingers.

The super soldier smiled fondly at his partner forgetting for a moment that it was all an act and letting himself enjoy the way it felt for Sam's hand to be in his.

"Sam, can I call you Sam?" suddenly the man's face fell and for a slight second Bucky was able to see a emotionless mask drop on the gentle face he had seen the past days, his anxiety grew when the man next to him nodded "I would like to speak to you in private, if you don't mind?" the question wasn't really a question and Sam nodded glancing at his partner. Bucky felt his hand still in Sam's and he tried to plead him with his eyes to not go alone.

There was something in the sudden change of emotions on the man's face that made him nervous and the thought of leaving Sam alone with him worried him more than he liked to admit.

But still, there was nothing he could do except watch as Sam left the room, following their target.

Wary of his surroundings Bucky noticed that the moment the door closed the men in the room had started to surround him.

He mentally cursed Zemo for leaving them alone at dinner but he didn't really have time to think about him since the guards in the room attacked him.

In a swift motion he grabbed Sam's previous chair and smashed it on a man's head and then turned around to take the gun out of another's.

Now he had a gun but the men in the room outnumbered him greatly so he used the first chance he got to get closer to a wall so that he could turn his back at it without risking of getting shot.

For some reasons the men in the room weren't shooting at him, they were attacking him physically and never more than two at a time. Bucky knew that there was something wrong about it but his mind was too worried about keeping him alive and worrying about his partner to really care about how they were attacking him.

But as the fight went on Bucky started to struggle against the men, he was sure he was going down but the thought of what could have happened to Sam kept him going.

Then the men suddenly stopped as the door opened, their target started clapping at him as he approached. "Good show Mr. Barnes" he commented with a smirk.

Bucky got up to attack him but the man's smile just grew making him falter. "Where's Sam?" he didn't like the way the man smiled at him, and he hated the sound he made with his tongue.

"Your fianceé? Oh he's right here" He turned towards the door as he spoke and two men threw Sam into the room. The man looked beaten up and there was blood running down his neck. He didn't seem to have the strength to get up but his eyes were open and they widened when he saw Bucky surrounded by men.

"Buck" the nickname fell softly from Sam's lips and his breath was cut short by a kick in the abdomen.

Bucky took a step forward but the man in front of him put a hand on his chest, without thinking he gripped the hand and turned it letting the man fall on the ground, he was about to hit him when he felt a low whine from his partner again. He lifted his eyes from the man under him to see Sam on the floor and Mr. White's foot on his throat.

"Touch one other of my men and your lover dies" he threatened pushing his foot harder against Sam's neck.

"Leave him" the super soldier hissed letting go of the man. When Sam throat was released Bucky realized he wasn't breathing too.

His anger only grew when Sam started coughing painfully still on the ground. looking at his partner he could feel his muscles aching for the need of doing something, anything, to protect him. But he couldn't. He knew that as soon as he moved Sam would die and the bare thought of it happening made him feel like he was underwater.

He felt panic raise at the back of his throat the more he realized there was nothing he could do to make things better. He could only watch as Sam was lifted from the ground and thrown into a chair with a loud groan.

They didn't even bother tying him, as it looked like even breathing pained him.

"Take off your gloves, soldier" Panic shot inside Sam eyes, he knew. He knew about Bucky arm. He knew who he was. And that couldn't be a good thing.

He wanted to tell him not to listen to him, he begged him with his eyes but Bucky slowly took of his glove revealing his metal hand. If Sam wasn't so worried about his partner he wouldn't have noticed how his flash hand shook as he took it off.

And that worried him a whole more. He was sure he was as worried as him about the man knowing who he was, but he couldn't have been more wrong. Bucky was worried, scared even, but it wasn't about himself. He couldn't help but feel like all of that was his fault.

The man had an interest in him, not Sam. Sam was a mean to an end. Sam was how he got to him.

He was the reason why Sam had gotten hurt and was now risking his life.

Guilt started to make his way into Bucky's mind as tears clouded his vision.

"So it's true. You are the Winter Soldier." Sam head shoot up to look at the man when he grabbed Bucky's metal arm and liftrd it. But Bucky kept his eyes on his partner, scared that if he stopped looking something could happen to him.

"Now I don't have your code words. But I'm sure that with the right leverage -Bucky flinched slightly when he pointed towards Sam- you will do the work just as good, isn't that right?"

"N-no" Sam struggled to talk and his voice came out a barely whisper, but Bucky heard him and felt his heart quiver. Even when his life was on the line, Sam still put his wellbeing before his own.

"Yes" Bucky face fell, his eyes cold and his body still. He hated it, he hated everything about it, but Sam was more important now.

"You will do some things for me and if you're good then maybe I won't kill your little boyfriend" Sam felt a wave of guilt wash over him. Seeing Bucky acting like the Winter Soldier wasn't anything knew, Madripoor was an example, but knowing that that man wanted him to kill. That was bad.

And it was his fault. Bucky was doing it because he wasn't strong enough, he just had to get himself caught and held hostage.

He wanted to scream, tell the man to fuck off and leave them alone. He wanted to do something, anything, to stop Bucky from acting like that.

His heart broke even more when Bucky muttered 'ready to comly' as if he had pronounced his trigger words. and when the man smirked at him Sam just knew that he need to act, even if it got him killed.

Thinking about it it was probably Bucky's best chance. If he died the man couldn't use him as leverage.

It hurt even to breathe but thinking about Bucky's freedom was enough to give him a motive.

Both men sprung into action at the same moment. Sam snatched the gun from the guy next to him while Bucky grabbed Mr. White throat. Within seconds the two men were close again and Sam held the gun to Mr. White head.

The moment his men started to get closer Sam shoot a bullet in the air as a warning and everyone in the room went still, waiting for their next move.

"You okay?" Sam asked gaining a very mad and very concerned look from his partner. "You're asking me if I'm okay?"

Sam snorted as he moved towards the exit, but walking was becoming increasingly more difficult and Bucky noticed so he used his free hand to steady his partner helping him get out. On his way out he broke the door handle locking everyone inside.

The moment they were out of trouble Bucky punched the target so hard Sam was sure he had heard bones crack.

"James! Samuel! here you are." Zemo came running towards them, stopping in his track when he looked at Sam. "What happened to you?" he tried touching the blood on Sam's neck but Bucky grabbed his hand before he could reach it.

"Tie him up in your room." Zemo glanced towards the man on the ground and nodded dragging him away from there.

Silence met the two men as they stared at each other, both of them too worried to even talk. But now was not the time to have a staring contest and Bucky came to his senses when he noticed Sam slowly losing balance.

He moved closer wrapping an arm around his waist and allowing him to put his arm around his shoulders.

Back to their room Bucky laid Sam on the bed and began to look the first aid kit. He started to open every bag they had and every closet, cabinet or drawer in the room but he couldn't find it.

He nervously glanced towards Sam urging him to stay awake. "In my bag" Sam smiled at him as Bucky fetched the kit and started patching his head.

"How do you feel?" Sighing deeply Bucky looked at him. "Stop asking me how I am, youre the one injured!" he raised his voice and felt immediately bad when Sam flinched.

"I'm sorry" Sam looked at him and just knew he wasn't talking about raising his voice. "Not your fault, I shouldn't have lowered my guard."

The soldier shook his head at that but stopped when Sam's hand found his cheek. "I'm okay Buck. How are you?"

Bucky faltered trying to resist the urge to lean into Sam's touch, he muttered something that reminded of a 'fine', and when he looked into his partner eyes he felt his resistance crumble to the ground.

He leaned into his hand while getting closer. Sam smiled at the closeness and Bucky swore to himself that he would have done anything in his power to make sure that smile was the only thing on his face for as long as Sam allowed him to be with him.

At the same time Sam swore that he would have done anything to keep Bucky safe from his past.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

is this bad? yes. am I going to post it anyways? yes.

next one

#bucky x sam #sam wilson x bucky barnes #sebastian stan #anthony mackie #fatws #the falcon and the snowman #the falcon and the winter solider spoilers #tfatws #sambucky #winterfalcon #sam wilson #captain america #captain america and the white wolf #I love my stupid ass boys

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fktonofwhatnow · 3 years

Note

ok hold on. acomaf is my fave book out of the whole series (it's mostly out of emotional value, i read it when i was younger and didn't have a real understanding out trauma and abuse only that i saw a character i loved getting out of a bad situation and getting happy) so obviously i didn't mind feysand being endgame and the development all of the characters had. i can accept tamlin turned out like that is realistic due to his trauma, i can accept feyre had to flee because it wasn't right for her, but the thing is after acofs i see no point to feyre leaving tamlin when rhysand ends up doing everything they told us tamlin was evil and unredeemable for. hiding the risks of her pregnancy, putting on shields on her, having feyre need to compromise over it. i honestly felt so betrayed by that. i'm not saying feyre and tamlin were good for each other, but it doesn't feel worth it to dismiss the potential they had for what we got with feysand.

also, sarah learn to treat "ugly" trauma with respect challenge. no they don't need to learn to physically fight to fight it. no they don't need a love interest to overcome it. yes the behaviors acquired from trauma and abuse aren't pretty but that doesn't mean a person is undeserving of kindness and compassion.

i think i had a point somewhere but i can't get to it. so hope you don't mind my rambling. anyway i loved your meta about tamlin i think he deserves better too

HOLY SHIT THIS ONE IS SO GOOD OK IM SO EXCITED

Bro you are so fine, I'm the one who doesn't make any sense and I totally get what you're trying to say. (Acomaf was actually my favorite book in the series too ngl)

BUT FUCK YEAH LETS TALK ABOUT RHYSAND.

I don't think it's a secret that Rhysand is one of my least favorite characters in media, probably ever? (How do I even put this into words) He is a bad character and to me, laughably so. You know how if you've ever written a character, there's that little phase that's like "what if people don't like this character' and then you're sad for a little bit? That's how Rhysand feels to me. He feels like SJM looked at this character and thought "I can't stand the thought of people not liking this character because I love him so much" and then did everything in her power to make sure we know how great he is.

Idk if this is just me screaming into the void, but I get to this place with my characters where like, especially if they are a little more morally gray or their decisions have negative impacts, I understand that I don't need the audience to like my main character. they can stand on their own, they can own up to what they do and they can grow from it. Thats what a good character does. That's how you keep your audience rooting for them. You gotta knock them over sometimes.

SJm doesn't knock Rhysand over. She doesn't push him to make mistakes, apologize, own up and move on. Rhysand has never made a decision that ended poorly for him. Everything goes the way he wants it to, because SJm wants us to know how cool and great he is. People who are cool and great don't make bad decisions! SJm doesn't let Rhysand fail, and she doesn't let him suffer his own decisions. Everyone else suffers his decisions, not him.

Rhysand's reputation as a good person hinges entirely on the audience liking him and/or thinking he's hot. And then what happens when the audience thinks neither of those things? Ya get a rly long post like this by a lil enby who is mad all the time. Rhysand loses all credibility when you look at him through a critical lens. Not a single thing the man does makes any goddamn sense. Here I thought acosf would give us a different perspective on Feysand and I was desperately hoping that Nesta would tell us what she really sees in them and how people around them really feel, I hoped that SjM would throw us for a loop and tell us that hey, she does know that Feysand are fucking toxic as hell and ruin the lives of people around them and she wants to show us that from an outside perspective but noooOoOOOoOoOOOO...

Instead we get Nesta hating herself because Rhysand told her that she shouldn't tell Feyre that Feyre could uh die in childbirth. Hey what the fuck.

Now I don't actually ship feylin, I kinda always sorta knew, even without spoilers, that it wasn't going to work out. Tamlin isn't sjm's idea of a good partner because he's not charming and witty and dark and handsome ya know? We met Rhysand and I knew that I was going to fucking hate this romance. Which sucks because I found Rhysand so intriguing in the first book. Ngl all the time spent in the spring court was kinda boring and every time Rhysand showed up to throw dead faeries at Tamlin I was like "oooooo" and I wanted to know more about why Tamlin, this awkward, blunt and kinda shy dude had beef with this super duper sly and shady man from another court.

I don't know if I've ever said this before, but SJm doesn't let her love interests grow. Rhysand doesn't change over the course of the story because he was already a good guy and his motives were for Feyre's sake I swear, the same goes for Rowan in TOG. SJm doesn't give Rhysand room to change. She needs to get to the part where they fuck make sure everyone knows that Rhysand is a good guy and actually he was good all along so that we like him more than Tamlin. It backtracks on everything bad Rhysand has ever done because you know... He had a good reason! It's fine!

I know it's probably just because SJm doesn't actually know how to write a good character growth arc but... Like can you imagine if Rhysand stayed the bad guy? Or at least remained the bad guy through acotar and acomaf? And then when Rhysand comes to take Feyre for his bargain it really was only to spite Tamlin? What about Rhysand, taking Feyre to the night court with him once a week every month for a long time, if only to see Tamlin's eyes grow darker and emptier every time he goes, and then he really starts to fall in love with Feyre. He's been a monster all this time, angry and cold and cruel and then he actually starts to fall in love. And then to get Feyre to stay he really does try to change, he stops antagonizing Feyre, he stops throwing dead faeries at Tamlin, and he stops harassing the Spring court. He starts spending genuine quality time with Feyre, he starts to learn about her and all the things she likes and he stops trying to get her to come with him just so Tamlin will be mad. He starts asking her to come with him because he wants to be around her and he prays that someday she'll want to be around him too. What if SJm let him grow.

But nahhhhhh instead we have a character who always knows the right answer to things, and he always knows how to fix every issue, and he is always so innovative and outside the box except that he isn't. We get a character who does the same shit as Tamlin but it's ok because he had a good reason not to tell Feyre that she could very well die in childbirth. Uhhhh don't know what that is but uhhh I know he has his reasons because all he has are his reasons.

It would be so easy to hold a mirror up to Rhysand and say "look at this. Look who you are. Do you not look just like Tamlin right now?"

But nooooooooOoOOOo Rhysand doesn't get to be wrong. Rhysand doesn't get to look like Tamlin because Tamlin is evil and Rhysand is definitely NOT I SWEAR.

But yeah I think the point I'm trying to make is that Sarah thinks so highly of Rhysand that he could never do wrong. He could never be like Tamlin, despite the narrative literally telling us the exact opposite.

Like you said, we lost the potential of what feylin could have been if SJm didn't suddenly decide that her audience needs to love Rhysand as much as she does. I think feylin could have been slow and sweet and a story of true healing and learning about one another. I think it would have been kind and steady and lots of "are you ok"s and "I'm sorry"s and "talk to me"s. Everything about Feysand feels rushed and hard and fast and the rest of the world doesn't have time to catch up. It's fucking exhausting to read it ya know what I'm saying.

(also can we talk about Rhysand like dying and Feyre finding the suriel and learning he's her mate and then instead of being like "k let's put a pin in that and fuckin save his life first" she like throws him around and everyone is like "wtf woman" and she's like I neeD tO Be alOnE these people have no idea how to prioritize)

Truly, I think it's innocent to a degree. There is absolutely no harm in wanting people to like your character. The harm comes when you destroy another character with no reason or explanation other than you want people to like a different character. Villain arc? Completely out of left field. You gotta build to that shit or like... Make it so that when you look back you slap your forehead and yell at a wall "OF FUCKING COURSE I SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT"

anyways, SJm treat "ugly" trauma with respect challenge SECONDED.

WELL IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME WEEKS YO WRITE IM HAVING A HARD TIME I know it probably doesn't make any sense I can't find my braincells BUT thanks for the ask @xelly

Tell me all your acotar things I love yo hear them !!

#rhysand #anti rhysand #anti sjm #anti acotar #anti inner circle #tamlin #lucien deserved better #they all deserved better frankly

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chizz · 2 years

Note

Hewwo RoryBae!!<3

I have a ask!!what about creeper!reader and Shigaraki?

(reader is a former hero)

Creeper quirk- the user can explode themselves!but they still alive, and If they die..they just respawn! The explosion can be changed by the user emotions

Sad- a explosion that can cause rain

Angry- really big explosion

Happy- explosion that the people around(not affected) feel happyness

Flustered- explosion that the people around who were not affected feel loved

Strongests explosions!-

Dynamite- a explosion that can destroy a whole building

Nuclear- A bomb that can explode a city

shock Bomb- a bomb that can cause shocks everywhere and almost hurt everyone near

(The strongests explosions, the user will need more time to use it again)

And the normal explosion (when the user explodes by themselves)- it's a normal creeper explosion!!<3

The reader look human, but inside them there's a bomb!

(idk why i choose shiggy, i Just..love him<33)

TAKE CARE ILY<33

Aww, I gotcha! Here you are beautiful! Let's say its christmas, you and shigaraki celebrate it together!

Shigaraki x Gendernatural reader

Its that time of the year! Christmas time! And your celebrating christmas with your boyfriend!

"Y/N, Get up, Baby its christmas~" shigaraki whispers into your ear, you only cover yourself more, trying to hide from the light shining from the outside.

"Mhn- not right now." You say, ignoring his pleas for you to get up. So...your not gonna get up? Hehe, he has something that'll wake you up.

"Sweetie, Angel, Beautiful, Darling, Baby~" that's it, he did it. You suddenly shake violently, while blushing, he quickly lifts you up, and takes you outside, making sure no one sees you two, he sets you down in the snow, and you...explode.

You respawn back in the front yard, looking irritated, he slightly opens the door, hoping you wouldn't be mad at him.

"You woke me up...?! What day is it-" you stop cause that sudden chill hits you, making you shiver cause your cold. Wanting to feel warmth, you head into the house, slamming the door behind you while your at it.

"I had to wake you up somehow. And...I guess it worked~"

He says huskily, you grab your hair in a fist, wanting to stop yourself from exploding.

"Your done. Your done." You say, waving your arms around, but then making it into a 'X' position, he only just laughs.

"Got you good didn't I? Maybe I'll do it again."

"I'LL BLOW THIS PLACE UP AGAIN. STOP TRYING ME, SHIGARAKI, DON'T DO IT." You scream at him, he just raises his eyebrows, confused as to why your so flustered.

"Anyways, merry christmas. Wanna open some presents? I'm not waiting on you. I didn't even think I would receive a gift, thanks anyways though! C'mon, I'm heading in the living room." He tells you, you grab some type of jar, wanting to throw it at him so bad, you raise it, aiming it at his head, but put it back down.

"Did you just say; 'anyways'? Bitc-"

⋆ ࣪ ᖭི༏ᖫྀ ⋆ ࣪ 𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼 ꒰ ა ♡ ໒ ꒱ ⋆ ࣪ ᖭི༏ᖫྀ ⋆ ࣪ ⋆ ࣪

"You really got me...a large ass sweater?" He looks at you in disbelief, holding the sweater up, shocked at the size, you cross your arms smirking.

"When I said I was going all out, I mean't what I said, you should've listened. Now you'll be all itchy." You snicker, leaning onto the wall with your arms crossed.

"Eh, I'll enjoy it anways, won't have to feel your warmth."

He playfully says, you roll your eyes, going to open your present, the wrapping has little knifes over it, don't ask why.

"I got...THE SKINCARE MASK! I'VE WANTED THAT FOR AWHILE! THANK YOU SO MUCH SHIGARAKI!" You squeal in happiness, he smiles while taking a picture of you and putting it in his sweatpants pocket.

"I got you something nice while you got me...something...just itchy. You know I have scratchy skin, and people say its love." He makes a 'are you serious?' Face. You just pretend not to see it, throwing his gift in his face, which he catches, but still hits him.

"I know you'll love this one!" He opens it, seeing its only a mug, labeled with: 'SCRATCH SCRATCH, ITCH ITCH'

"Angel...I love it, thank you!" He forcefully smiles, he loves it, he does, but wants to break that little smile off your face, because he knows what your doing.

He hands you an unusually square box, handing it to you, you grab it, looking at him curiously, then back to the box.

"Thank you, let's see.." you open it, and see a shirt that says: 'I'll explode, and you better run, I'll respawn and explode again, I'm chaos, Run.' You look at him, smiling.

"Thank you, I actually wanted...this?" You say, and he only takes another picture of you, and puts it in his pockets to keep.

"No problem Angel, my turn now!" He says excitedly.

"Y'know, I saw you eyeing something, and I think you know what it is." You eye him, smirking. His eyes only widen when you hint at something, he jumps off the couch excitedly.

"Don't tell me..." you just hand the box to him, he takes the wrapping off, and literally screams when he sees the gift you got him, he also sees the note.

'Merry Christmas to my best boi <3 love you shigaraki.'

You look up at him, then see a tear fall from somewhere, then you notice it's coming from him.

"Shigaraki...what's wrong?" You ask him softly, putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder, he grabs onto the hand that's on his shoulder.

"I just...never had no one do this for me before. Only you, that's why I love you so much." a smile forming on your face.

"Shigaraki, remember, I'd do anything for you-" you get cut off from him hugging you tightly.

"No, You Remember I'd do anything for you. I love you too much to get yourself hurt Angel." Shigaraki knew you used to be a hero, but he didn't care, he knew he had the heart eyes for you, so did you, you didn't care that he used to be a villain, you also knew you had the heart eyes for him.

Yes, he knows you explode when he teases you, but right now this moment will be a moment to remember. Cause...hes your shigaraki, and your his Y/N.

"I love you shigaraki." You smile into the hug, then pull away to give him a kiss.

"I love you too beautiful." He kisses you back, and you ask him how he likes the new game console, he jumps around explaining to you why he likes it, you only take a picture of him.

Then a kid passes by, looking at the two of you, wishing his parents was like that, sadly they...aren't. He wishes one day he can find the love of his life, just like you found yours.

Then he bikes away, smiling to himself, at least he doesn't have to hear his parents arguing, while riding away a squirrel steals some acorns from under the snow.

Today was a good day, maybe not for everyone, but for you and shigaraki...it was!

#mha shigaraki #shigaraki x y/n #christmas with shigaraki #shigaraki tomura

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elles-writing · 3 years

Text

Flowers for a girl

A/N: This still comes back sometimes, so I thought why not to write it down, though I don't exactly remember some parts of it for some reason (is it ptsd? idk), but in Middle-Earth AU, Kili is little younger (12-13 in human years, in TH he'd be like 16-17 i guess. Reader is 10-11 years old) and it happens before TH events. It's something different than I usually write, because it's based off on my personal experiences, so...yeah.

I wanted to write it down mainly for myself, to accept my past. If this is happening to you, please seek for help!! Better be safe than sorry. If you'd needed to, my ask box and messages are open, if you need to talk.

Warnings/triggers: description of emotional and physical bullying, body shaming, very low self esteem of reader, hints of swearing, eating disorder thoughts, mention of catcalling

If any of these is triggering you, please don't read this story!! Even if there is fluff, there are still these.

"Look at that fatty," one of the boys laughed into her direction. Y/n felt tears swelling in her eyes.

Don't cry, don't cry.

"How much do you weight? I bet as much as a pig!"

"You are so ugly and fat!" The other one said and pushed her. Y/n tried to do anything, but she was too scared.

"No, give it back, that's mine!" She said, when the boys took her sketchbook.

"Look at those drawings, they're like so bad," one of them pointed at them.

"Give it to me back!" She tried to grab him, but he put his arm up.

Don't cry, please, don't cry, not now...

"Ah, then come and get it!" He runned away, and Elle tried to catch him, but he was quicker.

"Ha! You out of breath already, you ugly fat pig? C'mon, come for it!" Him and other boys laughed. Y/N tried to catch his shirt, but he was running and jumping around.

"Look at how she jumps, look at her! It's like pudding!" They laughed. Y/N felt tears to come up into her eyes.

Don't cry, not now, you can't...

"Look, she's gonna cry!" You looked away, blinking furiously.

You can't cry in front of them.

"Leave her alone!" A voice came from behind the boys. They all looked back at him.

Y/N couldn't see him, she was shorter than them, and they were around her in a circle.

"Or what?" Said one.

"Look, the fatty got a boyfriend, eww!" One of the boys, and Y/N wanted to hide somewhere. She felt scared, shameful, and embarrassed.

Who would have ever loved her?

"Look, she's not speaking," they pushed her and Elle let out a surprised gasp as she fell to the ground.

"I'm saying it again, leave her alone," the other boy said. She looked around, and noticed him looking at her. She blushed, and looked away. He was handsome.

She knew she will hear about it later.

"Or what? What are you?"

"I'm Kili, from the line of Durin, and I would suggest you to get out, if you don't want me to kill you," he growled out, and Y/N felt fear rising in her. Would he hurt her?

Kili pointed the tip of one of his daggers to the main boy's throat, who then quickly took his friends and went away. They even threw her her sketchbook back.

"Did they hurt you?" Kili asked, then looked down at her for the first time.

She refused to look at him at first, but then she did. She was scared, and reminded Kili of a bunny.

She could be around ten years old. She was a human, he guessed, based on her ears.

"No, I'm...I'm okay," Y/N whispered and looked away.

"Thank you," she muttered.

"What happened? Why did they followed you?" Y/N looked down in her lap.

"I was drawing and reading here. I think they seen me, and went after me...it's been my safe place," You whispered.

"I can stay with you, in case they would come back," Kili offered before he thought of it. At this point, he was sitting down next to her.

"I-I don't know. They would laugh at both of us..." she said quietly, fearing of a wave of laugh. Kili furrowed his brows.

"How long has this been happening to you?"

"For over a year..." you said.

"I'm Y/n," she said a little awkwardly.

"I'm Kili," Kili introduced himself, remembering how his mother taught him to introduce himself.

"So that's decided, I'm staying with you," he said, and muttered some curses in Khuzdul, as he thought about the group.

"H-here, take my coat. It's getting cold," he said. She smiled nervously.

"Don't worry, I won't let them hurt you anymore," He offered her a smile, and she decided to take his offer, though she hoped he won't comment on her warming up face, or her body. She liked him, he was not just handsome, but actually kind to her.

It has never happened to her ever before, with a guy, who was a stranger...

The coat was big on her (that was a huge relief) and she cuddled into it.

"So, what are we going to do now?"

"Well, I-" Y/N didn't finished her sentence, because the first drop fell on her head, and other quickly started following. She gasped and quickly put her belongings to her bag. As she finished, it was raining heavily now. Her hair was soaking wet, sticking to her head.

Now he will see how I'm ugly, and laugh at me and call me names, and- she wanted to cry. Kili noticed her expression.

"So they did hurt you? Where is it?" Y/n shook her head, as they walked in the heavy rain.

"N-no, I just...I hope the sketchbook didn't got wet," she decided for the safer version.

"But you got wet. Where do you live?"

"Well...around twenty minutes of walk," Y/N said, so if anything, he wouldn't try to find her, though she was kind. But just to be safe.

"I'll take you home with me, it's not that far," Kili offered, and you quickly turned to him. He was kind, but her parents warned her about going somewhere with strangers.

"I-I think it's okay, thank you for your offer,"

"You are going to get wet to bone if you keep walking," Kili said and Y/N looked at him, but quickly looked away. The rain sticked Kili's hair and clothes to his body, and she blushed.

He surely has a girlfriend, don't be stupid, she snapped at herself.

He would never want to be with you, you are a child, and he is older. And he is super kind and handsome.

"Alright, then...I will go with you," you said unsurely. She thought she would think of something, if anything would go wrong. Plus, he was a prince. Y/N doubted he would do anything like this, if he was a prince.

"Amad, I'm home!" Kili said as he closed the door behind him. Y/N curiously looked around. It was a nice small house, with the smell of bread hanging in the air.

"Come with me," Kili said, and as Y/N was about to make a step, she noticed the puddle, and how she was soaked.

Before Y/N knew it, she was sitting in clean dry clothes, borrowed from Kili, wrapped in sweater and a blanket, sipping on warm tea.

"Kili, who is this?" Dis asked her son quietly. Kili looked at the human girl.

"Well, some boys called her names, so I went there, and then started raining, so I told her to come with me, because she told me she lives futher away, and she was soaking wet already..." Dis nodded, though she eyed her son, if he wasn't hiding anything.

"Where do you live, dearie?" Dis asked the little girl, who shyly looked around.

"I live near that small forest, my family owns multiple fields, and we work there," she admitted to the woman, who introduced herself as Dis.

"Would you like to have anything else to eat?" She offered her. Y/N shook her head. She didn't wanted to embarrass herself, and look like all she could do was to eat.

"No, thank you for your offer," she smiled, and carefully sipped on her tea.

The rain stopped, and Dis went with the girl where she lived, to explain what happened, and make sure she was safe.

Kili didn't seen the girl for next couple days, but when he was on the hunt in the forests, he overheard a conversation.

"He was cute, brown eyes and he was kind to me," Smile stretched across his lips, as he recognized that voice. He wasn't considered as too attractive among his kin, but hearing this made his heart warm up.

"Blue eyes are prettier, aren't they?" a voice of another girl said. Y/N was quiet.

"Well, they just are. Brown eyes aren't that pretty," the girl said.

"Don't you think so?" She turned to Y/N.

"W-well, um, depends on a person, I think?" The other girl got up.

"They are prettier." Kili could clearly see how Y/N looked down, and she seemed to feel sad.

He walked away, with thoughts of Y/N in his head, when he suddenly overheard some voices in the distance.

"Do you think we will find the pig today?"

"Probably. Her and her ugly drawings."

"It's not just her drawings who is ugly," the boys laughed.

"Do you remember her? 'Don't do that,' and then she went and started swearing back at us,"

"We are going to get her back, don't worry. She's slow runner, what about if we would take her things and made her run around? She would lose some weight at least."

"Great idea," other boys said. Kili felt his blood boiling.

How dare they to talk about her this way?

As the boys walked along, Kili prepared to scare them a little, but then he overheard another things.

"The guy who protected her, he has horrible taste in girls."

"Yeah, what a jerk. And those eyes the small fat pig made on him," one of them widely opened his eyes and wildly started blinking. The other boys were laughing.

Kili gripped his bow. He didn't knew the girl too much, but nobody deserved to be treated this way.

His arrows found their target quickly. The boys stopped, and looked around. Kili noticed they were really afraid, and smirked to himself.

When he came back home with two rabbits, he decided to go look around again. The sun was still not setting, so he still had some time.

His thoughts took him far away, and he didn't noticed he stepped on something, that felt like a pencil. He looked down, and realized it was a few pencils, hidden in grass, and when he looked around, he noticed sketchbook, hidden in old willow. If he wouldn't know what to look for, or didn't had as swift eyes, he wouldn't ever notice it.

He took the sketchbook out. It was familiar, and though he felt a little guilty, his curiousity was stronger.

He noticed a few sketches of trees, flowers and attempts of drawing people. They all were made with precision. They were not as realistic, but that certainly didn't mean they were not nice. It was drawn by someone, who was still learning, but truly excited about it.

Kili put it back carefully, and got back home.

It's been a few weeks, when he met the girl again. He came home with Fili from sword training, and his eyes widened when he noticed Dis with Y/N, chatting in the kitchen.

"Hi," she greeted them shyly.

"We have first strawberries, so I thought I would bring some for you," she shyly looked at Kili.

"Stop it," you muttered. Kili rose his brow.

"Oh, what is it?" He looked her into face, and noticed her shy smile, while he was grinning.

"You made me obsessed with these strawberry cakes your grandma bakes, can I have another one?" He made puppy eyes. Y/N sighed.

"Fine. But don't distract me, okay?" Y/N handed him the sweet pastry, and Kili winked at her.

"You're the best," He kissed her cheek quicker, than he thought of it. They both deeply blushed.

"Um, thank you, I suppose," Y/N muttered, and looked back into her sketchbook.

Meantime, when Kili chewed on his cake, Fili came back from his and Kili's room, and started reading a book. He started laughing, and Kili quickly took a look what was his brother laughing about.

"C'me read this, Y/N, this is so funny!" He said, but his smile froze, as he noticed her ashamed expression.

"What happened, Bunnie?" He used the nickname he gave her, because she loved bunnies. Y/N sighed.

"Well, um...it's embarrassing," she whispered.

"Neither of us will laugh at you, I promise," Fili said, and the girl looked at both of them. She took a deep breath.

"Icannotread," she muttered, and quickly looked away.

"You can't...read?" Y/N nodded shamefuly.

"It's, um...the school is too far for me to go alone there, so, um...yeah." The brothers shared a look, which Y/N took in different meaning. She felt tears in her eyes, but Fili was quick enough to notice.

"No, we won't laugh at you, Y/N!" He said and pulled the girl into a bear hug. Kili quickly joined.

"Yeah, Bunnie, don't worry. We would never laugh at you," Y/N relaxed in the hug.

"Thank you," she muttered, and hugged them back.

They spend rest of the day by teaching her how to read, and write. Soon after, Y/N started studying with the brothers.

"You are distracting me," Y/N muttered, as Kili was kicking his legs back and forth. It was summer - over four months after they met. Y/N sat up on the tree, and Kili was sitting down on branch a little lower.

"How can be that possible?" He looked at her innocently. Y/N blushed, when she seen his big brown eyes in sunlight. They were in shades of melted gold and caramel.

"The tree is shaking, and I want to enjoy reading this book without distractions."

"I'm not a distraction!" Kili pouted.

"You are," Y/N offered him a smile, and got back to her book. Kili pouted a little more.

"Will you read it to me, then?" Y/N looked at him, and dramatically sighed.

"Fine. But let's sit down on the ground," Kili got down, and then he carefully placed his hands around her waist, Y/N placed her hands on his shoulders for support, and he put her down.

Y/N sat down, her back leaning against the tree, and Kili placed his head on her lap. Y/N smoothed her skirt and placed her book next to her, so she could read it, while playing with Kili's hair.

Y/N was the only one allowed to touch Kili's hair, aside from Kili's family. She never understood why dwarves were such touchy about their hair, but again, she was the same way, so she fully respected it.

Kili fell asleep after a while, on the sound of her voice.

"You the last cake I said was mine!" Y/N growled out and Kili laughed, but he quickly stopped laughing.

After the months of spending time together, running around the fields and archery lessons, she got much stronger, so her punches had strength and would hurt. Kili and Fili would never hit or fight with a girl, and though Y/N became like another part of the family, only tickle fights were allowed with her.

"You-you Kili!" Y/N was more upset than angry, and Kili started laughing again, as he was jumping around and trying to get away from her punches.

"Stop, Bunnie," and tickled her.

"N-NO-T T-HAT P-PLAC-E, K-KI-LI!" Kili grinned.

"Awn, who is ticklish?"

"I ha-te you!" Y/N slid her hand across the back of his neck, and Kili let out a squeal.

"N-NOO!" You giggled as you started tickling him.

"Gotcha," You sticked out your tongue on him, and quickly runned away to hide, before he would get you back.

You runned, but didn't noticed when you bumped into someone.

"Aah, long time no see," a voice said, and you shivered.

"You squeled on us, huh? Is that everything you can do? You loser," the boy said. Y/N kept quiet, with her head down.

"Oh, look guys, she's going to cry! What are you gonna do? Run to your mommy, or your friends? Go on, you tettle-tale." Elle felt tears in her eyes, and quickly looked up.

"I'm not a tettle-tell, I-"

"That's what you say, and then you will go and tell your mommy about 'the big boys are bullying you'," they laughed. Elle wished she could hide somewhere, and try to cry. She wasn't able to cry, even when she was alone, as she learned to hide her tears.

Whoosh

And then a yelp from the boys.

Y/N looked up and noticed the arrow in one of the surrounding trees. It was Kili's arrow.

"You told someone to spy?! You will pay for this later," one of the boys said, and then another two arrows pierced through the air. The boys quickly walked away, leaving her alone.

Kili runned out from behind the trees, and pulled her close to his chest. He started saying something angrily in Khuzdul, and Y/N was sure those were swear words.

"Shh, it's okay, I'm here," Kili whispered, when he finished his quick session of swear words. Y/N shook in his embrace.

"Let's go home," he said. They picked up his arrows, and went home.

Kili made Y/N tea and gave her his favourite sweater, which also happened to be her favourite as well.

When Y/N went to sleep, Kili checked her every few minutes. He felt guilty. He should've protected her better, stay with her.

He carefully sat to the edge of the bed, and slid his thumb softly over her cheek.

"I will make sure they get what they deserve," he muttered and softly caressed her cheek.

"Sure, I will go with Bella and Alia, you don't need to worry about me, I will be safe," Elle gave Kili a smile. Her two friends from her neighbourhood, with who she enjoyed to spend time too.

"I just don't want you to get hurt," he shrugged, and sharpened his dagger. Y/N started on brushing her hair.

"The boys won't do anything, if they meet us in a group. Plus Fili gave me that sharp dagger for my fourteenth birthday, I always keep in my shoe."

Kili looked at his friend, focused on brushing out the knots in her hair. Y/N grew up and changed the way she reacted to what other people told her. But that wasn't just what changed.

She grew up into a young woman. She was beautiful, and some girls were jealous of her because of it, but luckily, Y/N had great friends.

"You home, sleeping beauty?"

"Oh, of course I am!" Kili grinned as he heard Bella's voice.

"No, you are snoring beauty."

"That's Fili!"

"That's both of you," Y/N rolled her eyes, but chuckled. She and Kili said their goodbyes to each other, and her friends she knew for three and two years, turned to her.

"So, how was your date?" Y/N blushed.

"He gave me flowers for my birthday, so what? That's what friends do." Y/N turned to Alia to change the topic.

"How about you and girls?" The blonde rolled her eyes.

"Some of them are arrogant, but other than that it's good. But I have you, so I don't care," she grinned and hugged her friends around their shoulders.

"So, what do you-" Bella started, when a group of boys passed them. They whistled, and started talking about them. Y/N's cheeks blushed, as she overheard them.

"Don't listen to those idiots, they still share one brain cell," Bella and Y/N said at once, and they all laughed, though Y/N didn't felt any happiness. Her instinct to run and hide from these boys was still there.

And then we arrived to the market. I still looked around if they were not there, but luckily not, Y/N wrote down the sentence, and put the notebook aside. She felt happy they didn't recognized her, but it still stressed her out. She looked over to the bow and quier with arrows Kili gifted her, when she had thirteenth birthday.

"Trouble with sleeping?" Kili's raspy voice appeared behind her.

"Yeah," Y/N sighed out, and pat on the bed next to her.

"C'me here, snoring beauty," Kili chuckled at that nickname.

"Ugh, again?" You nodded with a grin.

As you laid in safety of Kili's arms (and him being soundly asleep), your mind turned into a specific direction. Would Kili like you? Not just as a friend, but...more?

You'd fall asleep like this, if you had bad dreams. Kili fell asleep first, and softly snored, but he looked cute while doing so. You shook your head, and decided to listen to his breath, and soon, you fell asleep yourself.

The memories of the times you used to be bullied by those boys came back. You didn't felt confident at all, and mostly sad. You couldn't fall asleep at night, and you often found yourself looking over your body. Fat pig, that's how they called her. Was she still...like this? Would she ever be pretty enough?

It's been a while, since she cried before sleep, and then fell asleep afterwards.

The brothers noticed something was going on, when their friend seemed to be bothered by something. So, they decided to do thing they always did, which was making flowercrowns together.

"You're messing it up, Fili," you giggled, when the blonde prince's flowercrown fell apart.

For fifth time in twenty minutes.

"Well, I'll go get some fresh flowers, over here," he pointed to the carpet of daisies in the golden light of setting sun.

"Guess who," Said smooth voice next to your ear, when his hands covered your face.

"Hmm, is that you, Ki?"

"Who else."

Kili sat in front of you, and placed a flowercrown on your head. You both stood up, and he twirled you around.

"I've got you something else," he whispered.

"Flowers," you looked happily over the small fresh bouquet of wild flowers, and felt warmth spreading in you. You looked into his chocolate eyes.

"Kili, thank you so much, it's...it's beautiful,"

"Not nearly as beautiful as you," he looked deeply into your eyes.

"Flowers for a girl," he said, with a slightly pink-tinted cheeks.

"Now finally braid her hair," the lion prince's voice interrupted the romantic scene.

#kili #the hobbit #fili #kili x reader #fili x reader #fanfiction #the hobbit fanfiction #x reader #reader insert

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