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justsomewritingblog · 5 months

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Late Night Lessons

Request: None

Requested By: Nobody

Prompt: "You are possibly the worst I've ever trained." "Thanks for the encouragement."

Pairing: Harry Potter x Gryffindor!OC/reader

Summary: Drastic measures are taken when Umbridge takes over Hogwarts, forcing the students to practice magic on their own. A certain Gryffindor is having difficulties, though...

Warnings: some mentions of injury and wounds (Umbridge's detentions), distant family

A/N: I know they had the meeting in Hogsmeade before finding the Room of Requirement, but the conversation felt like it flowed naturally this way, so I left it.

Word Count: 5K+

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was the worst year of my life.

Dolores Umbridge had taken over the school, restricting everything under the sun and causing torment for anyone that even thought about stepping out of the line she had drawn.

I walked with Hermione back to the Common Room, grumbling about the lack of practice in DADA.

“I mean, honestly,” I complained, “how does she expect us to defeat Voldemort if we can’t get any practice?”

“I know. The readings aren’t even very useful.”

“They’re useless!” I gestured wildly. “It’s not like Voldemort’s going to quiz us when he finally decides to rear his ugly head.”

Hermione was silent as I continued to rant, waving my free hand through the air and nearly accidentally slapping her a couple times.

I could feel my anger rising the more I spoke, just thinking about the situation getting me more and more upset.

“We need a workaround,” Hermione interrupted.

I turned to look at her, raising an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”

“We need a Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Someone with experience.”

I let out a scoff. “And who would that be?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I don’t know if I can, Hermione.”

“Harry, we don’t have much of a choice,” the muggle-born pressed. “You’re perfect for the job.”

“And what if we get caught,” Ron questioned. “We’re likely to be in some serious trouble.”

I leaned forward in my seat. “Then we’ll just have to make sure we don’t get caught, won’t we?”

The three turned to me.

“And how do you propose we do that,” Harry questioned.

“I’m not sure yet. But we need to find a safe place.” I held my chin in thought. “Somewhere that’s off the radar…that we can work in privacy and security.”

The room fell silent as we all thought.

“An empty classroom might do it,” Ron suggested.

“It might,” I acknowledged.

“We’d have to place some protection charms, then,” Hermione noted. “Just in case someone walks in.”

“Especially if it’s noisy.”

“We’re bound to draw attention to ourselves either way,” Harry spoke up. “If anyone sees a bunch of students going to the same place-”

“That’s an easy fix,” I said. “We’ll just have to split up into smaller groups of twos and threes and have everyone show up at different times.” I looked over at Harry, holding his gaze in an attempt to provide him some assurance and strength. “No one will be the wiser.”

A few beats passed and he nodded.

“It’s settled, then.” Hermione looked between the three of us. “We’ll start looking tomorrow.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

“It’d probably be best if we split up,” I whispered to Hermione, Harry and Ron. “We can cover more ground that way.” I shrugged one shoulder. “And maybe it’ll look less suspicious.”

The three nodded.

“I’ll take this side,” Hermione gestured behind her. “Harry, you take that way,” she pointed to her left, “Davies, you that way,” she pointed ahead of herself, behind me, “and Ron, you that way,” she gestured to the right.

“What are we doing?”

Everyone spun to face the new voice.

“Neville…” I greeted with a grin that looked more like an anxious grimace. “What’s going on?”

He looked down at me. “I was about to ask the same thing.” His gaze shifted between everyone in the group.

We all exchanged glances.

“We’re building an army,” Harry admitted quietly. “We’re looking for somewhere private and safe to practice magic.”

“You can help us look, if you want,” Ron piped up.

Neville was silent for a few moments before nodding. “Which way do I go?”

“Er…” I trailed off. “Wherever you want, I guess?”

“We already each have a way, so you can pick your own,” Harry said.

“Unless I group with Hermione, or two of you boys group,” I suggested, crossing my arms. “Since boys and girls aren’t supposed to be within six inches of each other.”

Silence followed.

“I’ll go with Harry,” Ron finally said. He glanced over at his friend. “We’re always together, anyway. It might look more suspicious if we’re apart.”

“Good point,” I admitted.

“Alright.” Harry nodded, looking between everyone. “Let’s go.”

~~~~~~~~~~

I made my way through the school, observing every door. With each one I passed I mentally made notes on them. So many of them were in crowded halls. There was no way we were going to be able to use them secretly.

Letting out a huff, I tugged on my hair in annoyance as I turned another corner.

Dead end.

With a sigh, I headed back to the Common Room.

Maybe the others had better luck.

~~~~~~~~~

I strode back to the Common Room as quickly as I could, desperate to hear how the others did. Approaching the Fat Lady, I instantly supplied the password, not even slowing my steps and walking inside.

The portrait closed behind me.

My name was called and I turned, seeing the golden trio and Neville waving me over. I walked over, sitting on the floor between Harry and Hermione. “How’d we do,” I asked.

“Neville found a secret room,” Harry supplied quietly, leaning over to avoid the rest of the students hearing.

I looked over at him, slightly taken aback by the proximity and the intensity of his blue eyes. I blinked before clearing my throat. “That’s great,” I said hoarsely. I forced my gaze to Neville. “Where is it?”

“It just appeared on the wall. I’ll show you guys when I can.”

“We want in, too.”

We all snapped our heads to the voice, seeing Fred and George leaning over us.

The matching serious expressions looked very out of place on their faces.

Harry looked up at them. “Fine.”

“We should find out who else is interested,” Hermione suggested.

“We have to be careful, though.” I looked over at her. “We don’t want anyone telling Professor Umbridge,” I warned.

“Who do we really trust? We can’t exactly just send out an advertisement,” Hermione said.

The group fell silent.

“We’ll work on that,” Harry decided.

I nodded and looked over at Neville. “Where’s this room?”

~~~~~~~~~

“You’ve done it, Neville,” Hermione said as you all observed the large, open room. “You’ve found the Room of Requirement.”

“The what,” Ron asked.

“It’s also known as The Come and Go Room,” she expanded. “The Room of Requirement only appears when a person has real need of it, and is always equipped for the seeker’s needs.”

“So…say you really needed a toilet…”

Everyone turned to look at the redhead.

“Charming, Ronald,” Hermione said. “But yes…that is the general idea.”

“It’s brilliant,” Harry finally spoke up. “It’s like Hogwarts wants us to fight back.”

I looked around before turning to Harry. “Maybe it does.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Neville stared at the practice dummy, his wand raised.

Harry gave an encouraging nod.

Neville looked back to the dummy. “Expelliarmus!” His wand flew backwards out of his hand.

I, and everyone else in line, ducked out of the way.

“I’m hopeless,” Neville mourned.

“You-you’re just flourishing your wand too much,” Harry advised. He held up his own wand. “Try like this.” Looking at the dummy, he flicked his wand. “Expelliarmus!”

The dummy’s ‘wand’ flew onto the floor.

I grinned.

The line in front of me shortened as Ron, Hermione and Luna all tried, each with varying levels of success.

Harry looked over at me. “Your turn.”

I nodded, stepping forward and raising my wand. Taking a deep breath, I narrowed my eyes at the dummy. “Expelliarmus!”

The fake wand shot out of its hand, landing a few feet away.

I grinned as I put my wand in my pocket.

“Nice work,” Harry said, nodding at me with a smile as he placed the wand back in the dummy’s hand for the next student.

I beamed at him, moving to the side to allow Fred to go.

“Great job,” Hermione whispered to me as Fred and George easily performed the spell.

“Thanks,” I whispered back. “You, too.”

~~~~~~~~~

“Stunning is one of the most useful spells in your arsenal,” Harry stated, walking between the two sides we had formed. “It-it’s sort of a wizard’s bread and butter, really.”

I made a confused face at the odd analogy.

Ron chuckled.

“...on then, Nigel,” Harry said. “Give me your best shot.”

Everyone turned to look at the first- or was that second- year boy standing several paces opposite an unarmed Harry.

The ginger boy shuffled a little on his feet before aiming his wand at Harry. “Stupefy!”

The spell hit Harry and he shot backwards, landing hard on his back.

Nigel also got flown backwards, though not as far.

I winced.

“Good,” Harry said, a little breathless as he pushed himself off the floor. “Not bad…at all, Nigel. Well done.” He stood, clearing his throat and dusting off his hands. “Next.”

Ron and Hermione stepped forward, sharing a quiet exchange, before Ron walked to the other side of the room, standing where Harry had.

They studied each other for a moment.

Ron opened his mouth, but he was too slow.

Hermione yelled out the spell, shooting Ron backwards.

I covered my mouth with my hand, eyes wide.

“Next.”

I stepped forward, turning to see who else had joined me.

One of the Weasley twins stood before me, too far away to tell which one it was.

I did my best to mask my apprehension.

“I’ll go easy on you, love,” he said, shrugging one shoulder. “I am two years ahead of you, after all.”

“Don’t do me any favors, Weasley,” I shot back, trying to force my nerves down as I raised my wand.

The twin shrugged, moving back to the spot Ron had previously occupied.

“You got this, Freddie,” the other twin called.

I narrowed my eyes at the twin I now knew to be Fred, swallowing a lump in my throat. I snapped my arm forward, yelling out “stupefy!”

Fred blocked it with another spell, sending a “stupefy” my way.

The spell came at me so quickly I had no time to deflect it.

I flew backwards, landing on the ground with a very audible thud. I winced.

Fred leaned over me moments later. “Sorry, Davies.”

I groaned. “I thought you said you’d take it easy on me.”

He shrugged, giving me a cheeky grin. “You said not to do you any favors.”

Letting out a huff, I nodded in recognition.

His grin grew as he reached down a hand to help me up. Pulling me to my feet, he clapped a hand on my shoulder before walking back to his counterpart.

“Next,” Harry called.

I rubbed at my back as I moved out of the way for the next students.

“Are you alright,” Harry asked quietly.

I turned to look at him, meeting his concerned gaze. “I’ll be fine.” I smiled at him. “Thanks.”

He held my eyes a moment longer before nodding, turning sharply away from me to look at the dueling students.

~~~~~~~~~

“Have you heard?”

I turned my head to Hermione briefly before looking back towards where I was going. “Heard what?”

“Professor Umbridge is holding interrogations between classes,” she hissed.

I snapped my head towards her.

“She knows something’s going on.”

My steps slowed to a stop. I stared at Hermione for a long moment. “She can’t get to us, can she? I mean…” I lowered my voice to a whisper, “won’t the Room know that it needs to keep her out and adjust for it?”

“I don’t know. I suppose it depends on the magic of Hogwarts in comparison to her own.”

I huffed, falling into step beside Hermione as she started walking again.

After several beats of silence, Hermione quietly wondered “I wonder what she uses to try to get the students to talk…”

I frowned. “I don’t want to know.”

~~~~~~~~~~

“Very good- keep your concentration,” Harry said as he made his way through the groups of students. “Nice work.”

I focused on levitating one of the third years, my eyes narrowed as I tried to keep him up.

“Good job,” Harry’s soft voice came from right beside my ear.

My attention faltered, the third year dropping slightly before I regained focus and kept him hovering, though lower than previously.

“Widen your stance just a little,” Harry advised.

I felt a pair of hands land on my waist, a foot working its way between mine to shove them a little further apart.

A quiet, but audible gasp escaped me as my face flared.

The boy fell.

I blinked at him. “I am so sorry.”

He stood, rubbing his elbow. “It’s alright.”

I turned to glare at Harry, who stood only a few inches away from me.

Our eyes locked and my expression, without my consent, lost most of its malice.

He looked over at me. “Sorry.”

I hummed, wanting to look angry at him, but finding myself unable to.

He held my gaze before clearing his throat. “Try again.”

At my hesitant nod, he moved on.

I let out a harsh exhale, turning back to the third year. “Are you ready to try again?”

He raised an eyebrow at me. “Are you?”

~~~~~~~~~

“Working hard is important,” Harry began, adjusting people’s grips on their wands as they practiced against each other. “But there’s something that matters even more: believing in yourself.” He helped a student send a spell at another before moving on, after looking to see if they were alright. “Think of it this way…every great wizard in history has started out as nothing more than what we are now…students.” He continued to move through the room, maneuvering around people. “If they can do it, why not us?”

I smiled.

Harry pulled out the practice dummy again, wheeling it between everyone. “Form a circle.”

Everyone walked closer.

“Now, don’t let the dummy touch you,” he instructed. “If it gets close, send a spell at it to knock it away.”

I pulled out my wand. “Sounds like a game, Harry,” I said, grinning.

He grinned back. “It is. Kind of.” He looked back to the rest of the students. “Alright- someone send the first spell.”

Fred was quick to cast a “stupefy” at the dummy.

It shot across from him, towards one of the fourth years.

“Wingardium leviosa!”

The dummy spun around the room, getting spell upon spell cast at it.

“Stupefy!”

It spun to Neville.

“Expelliarmus!”

It rocketed towards Ginny.

“Reducto!”

The dummy exploded into ashes.

Everyone whipped their heads to face the youngest Weasley in amazement.

“Geez, Ginny,” I muttered, looking back to the pile.

~~~~~~~~~

Harry moved to step in front of everyone, Ron and Hermione on either side of him. “So, that’s it for this lesson. Now, we’re not going to be meeting again until after the holidays…”

Disappointed groans filled the room.

“So, just keep practicing on your own as best you can, and- and well done everyone. Great, great work,” he said with a proud smile.

Everyone clapped.

Students began to file out of the room, thanking him as they went.

I hung in the back with Ron and Hermione, waiting for everyone to get their turn, as well as not having everyone rushing out of the same place at the same time.

We didn’t need to draw more attention to ourselves than we already had.

Once everyone had left, Harry approached the three of us.

“Good job, Harry,” I said, smiling at him.

“Yeah,” Ron agreed. “Well done, mate.”

Hermione grinned. “I told you that you’d do well, Harry.”

The Boy Who Lived stopped in front of us. “Thanks.” He looked between us. “You’re all doing really well, too.”

“Well, it helps to have a teacher with experience,” I stated. “The only other people here with experience like that are actual teachers, and they can’t help us.”

Ron and Hermione sent quiet goodbyes our way, saying they’d see us in the Common Room.

I waved.

“See you, guys,” Harry replied. When the two left, Harry turned back to me.

Silence filled the air.

I wrapped my arms around myself, lowering my gaze to the floor as I scuffed my foot against the stone. Clearing my throat, and without looking up, I asked “do you have any plans for the holidays?”

Harry shrugged. “I don’t really have a family to go back to, and Sirius is…” he trailed off.

“Elsewhere,” I supplied.

Harry nodded before looking up at me. “What about you?”

“I’m staying at Hogwarts for the holidays,” I confessed.

Harry addressed me silently for a few moments. “Do you have a family?”

I looked over at him. “Yes. But they’re away.” I turned my head to the side, looking at the wall. “Some business trip, or something.”

“Well, we’ll be here together, at least.”

My gaze shifted to the boy and I let a small smile form on my face. “Yeah.”

We stood in a few more beats of silence before Harry spoke up.

“We should get going. I think enough time has passed.”

I nodded, gesturing to the door. “After you, Potter.”

~~~~~~~~~

“I snagged these from the kitchen.” Grinning, I set a plate of cookies down on the table in the Common Room.

Harry looked up at me from his spot on the couch, his expression a mix of amusement and shock. “You stole them?”

I shrugged one shoulder, sitting down beside him as I picked up a cookie. “We practically have Hogwarts to ourselves.” I bit off part of the cookie and chewed it. “Unless these were for the teachers.”

Harry reached forward, taking a cookie for himself. “Well, if you’re eating them, I might as well.”

I sent a crooked grin his way. “I really pulled your arm there, didn’t I, Potter?”

He chuckled, a little bashfully, as he ate his treat.

We fell into silence, the only sounds being our own breathing and the crackling of the fireplace.

The fire’s warm glow filled the room, the heat radiating off of it covering me like a cozy blanket.

The Christmas tree sparkled in the corner, snow falling in front of the window.

I let out a long content sigh, relaxing into the couch and letting my eyes flutter closed.

This was the epitome of comfort.

The couch shifted beside me and I opened my eyes, turning to look at Harry.

He glanced at me before looking back at the table sheepishly. “Sorry.”

I chuckled. “You’re good.”

The silence that followed was slightly tense.

“Is Christmas your favorite holiday,” I asked, leaning forward to better see Harry, resting my elbows on my knees.

He looked over at me. “Probably.” Glancing back at the cookie tray, he rubbed his hands together. “It was never very nice with my Aunt and Uncle, but since coming to Hogwarts, I’ve enjoyed it more. I get to spend the holiday with the people I care about.” He looked over at me. “If that makes sense.”

I nodded. “Absolutely.”

“What about you?”

I clasped my hands together, looking at them. “Well… my family isn’t very close.” I pulled my hands apart, gesturing with my right. “We would spend the holiday together, but it wasn’t like the Christmas’ I would hear about from the other families I knew. Theirs would be filled with laughter and happy memories.” I looked at the fireplace, resolutely not looking at the boy next to me. “I got presents, and we would be together all day, but…” I trailed off, shrugging. “I don’t know. It just…felt fake.” I finally looked over at Harry, meeting his concerned blue eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.

I smiled somewhat sadly. “Well, like you said, now I have Hogwarts. I have you, Hermione and Ron.” My smile grew. “I have Ginny, the twins, Seamus…” Reaching forward, I grabbed Harry’s left hand with my right. “I enjoy Christmas a lot more than I used to, too,” I finalized, reaching forward to grab another cookie with my free hand.

Harry smiled, giving my hand a gentle squeeze before grabbing another cookie, himself. “Merry Christmas, Davies,” he said quietly as we settled back into the couch.

“Merry Christmas, Potter.”

~~~~~~~~~

I made my way to Harry’s class, strolling through the castle halls. I was still going to be early, and I had to make sure to not draw any suspicion to myself, so I wasn’t hurrying. Nearing the entrance to the Room of Requirement, I turned a corner.

The sight had my steps faltering slightly.

I quickly recovered, crossing my arms and halting in my steps, plastering a confident smirk on my face. “Well, if it isn’t Malfoy and his goons… formerly.”

Draco sneered, marching towards me with quick steps, Crabbe and Goyle on either side of him.

They walked behind him, as they always did.

I briefly wondered if they knew that Draco only kept them around to be his bodyguards and viewed them as no more than that.

“What did you say, Davies?” Draco’s tone was harsh as he approached me, using his height to try to intimidate me.

I looked up at him. “Well, I said ‘formerly’, because you’re no longer ‘Malfoy’s gang’.” I took my time in raking my gaze across the three of them, eyes drifting across the badges they’d received from our new ‘headmaster’, letting my words sink in. “I’d say ‘Umbridge’s puppets’ is much more fitting…” I looked up and held Draco’s cool gaze, lowering my voice slightly, making sure to add bite to it. “Don’t you?”

Anger flashed through his gray-ish blue eyes. “I could take you in, Davies,” he said sternly, gesturing at the badge hanging from his robe. “I have the authority.”

I let out a short laugh. “For what?”

He looked down at the space between us before looking back up at my eyes. “You’re within six inches of me, Davies.”

“You invaded my space,” I reminded.

Malfoy grabbed my arm, leaning down slightly to crowd me as he gave a vicious smirk. “Professor Umbridge doesn’t know that.”

My eyes widened as he dragged me away.

~~~~~~~~~

I hurried to the Common Room, cradling my hand to my chest. Stopping in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady, I wiped my watery eyes and quickly uttered the password.

The portrait swung open, even as the Fat Lady looked at me with concern.

Stepping in, I went to make a beeline straight to my dorm but a call of my name had me halting in my quest.

I closed my eyes. If I didn’t go over, they would know something was wrong. Taking a brief second to steel myself, I turned around, approaching the three Gryffindors sitting on the couch. “What’s up, guys?” I forced my tone to sound more cheerful.

“What happened,” Hermione questioned. “You weren’t in class…” she prompted quietly.

“I…” I pulled my sleeves down over my hands. “I got held up.”

“We were worried about you,” Ron said.

I smiled at him. “Thanks, Ron.”

“You missed a good lesson,” Hermione informed. “We started learning about how to cast a Patronus.”

“Really?” I shifted my gaze to Harry before looking back at Hermione. “How’d it go?”

“It’s bloody hard,” Ron deadpanned.

Hermione gave him a slightly exasperated look before smiling up at me. “It is difficult, but we’ll get it.” She looked over the red head to look at the Boy Who Lived. “Harry’s been trying to walk us through it.”

I shifted my gaze to Harry. “How’s that been going?”

He smiled. “It’s the hardest thing we’ve done yet, so it’s a little challenging.”

I nodded, looking to the wall as my hand trembled. I slowly reached my other hand over, resting it on top of it.

“Are you alright?”

My head whipped back to look over at Harry, dropping my hand instantly. “Yeah. Why?”

Harry looked at me for a few moments before holding his hand out, palm up. “Can I see your hand?”

Hermione and Ron fell silent, turning to look at us.

I stared at Harry, remaining as stoic as I could. I gave him my right hand.

He didn’t break eye contact with me. “The other one.”

“Harry-” I tried to protest, but he reached forward, taking my left hand carefully and rolling up my sleeve. I winced at the sudden air to the open wound, as well as the knowledge that everyone was staring at it.

Everyone gasped.

‘I must not harass boys’ was carved across my hand.

Harry looked up to meet my eyes, his blue eyes filled with fury. “What-”

“It was Malfoy,” I interrupted, looking down at the words in my irritated skin. I cleared my throat, trying to get rid of the lump that formed there. “He claimed I had crossed the ‘six inch’ rule to get at him.” I clenched my right hand. “In reality, he was the one that invaded my space.” Letting out a huff, I moved my gaze from my hand to the floor. “But of course, it was the testimonies of three against one.”

“Crabbe and Goyle,” Ron supplied, frowning.

I nodded.

Hermione reached out, holding my other hand.

I looked up at the ceiling, trying to force the tears away.

A silence fell over the group, which Ron thankfully broke.

“Malfoy’s the worst.”

~~~~~~~~~

“That’s it.” Harry walked through the students. “Think of a powerful memory. The happiest you can remember. Allow it to fill you up. Keep trying, Seamus.” He walked over to the twins. “George, your turn.”

George flicked his wand. “Expecto Patronum!”

Pale wisps, a whitish blue, spiraled out of his wand.

Harry continued walking. “A full-bodied Patronus is the most difficult to produce, but shield forms can also be equally useful against a variety of opponents.”

Ginny’s wisps turned into a horse head that whinnied.

Harry beamed. “Fantastic, Ginny!” He kept walking. “Remember, your Patronus can only protect you for as long as you stay focused, so Luna-!”

The girl kept staring at the floor.

Hermione’s Patronus, an otter, floated around her head.

“Think of the happiest memory you can.”

“Expecto Patronum.” Neville’s wand let out a few spirals, but nothing more. He turned to Harry. “I’m trying.”

“I know,” Harry assured. “It’s good.” He moved on, even as Ron’s dog Patronus ran between Neville’s legs, knocking the boy over. “This is really advanced stuff, guys, you’re doing so well!”

A bunny formed in front of Luna, hopping around the room.

My wand sparked again.

I glared at it.

“Stupid wand,” I grumbled under my breath. The urge to throw the thing that had chosen me five years ago was getting increasingly difficult to ignore. I huffed, closing my eyes, trying to focus.

“How’s it going?”

I snapped my eyes open, looking over at Harry. I was certain he could guess based on the expression I was sure was on my face, but I humored him. “Dreadful.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Watch.” I closed my eyes again, focusing hard on my memory. I opened my eyes again, holding my wand out. “Expecto Patronum!”

My wand let out a few white sparks.

I looked over at Harry. “Maybe my wand’s busted.”

“I think that’s unlikely. What memory are you thinking of?”

I hesitated, gaze shifting between his eyes. “Getting my Hogwarts letter.”

“That’s your strongest happy memory?”

My gaze lowered to my wand. “It was all I could come up with.”

Harry pursed his lips, regarding me thoughtfully.

I shifted a little uncomfortably under his stare.

“We could try private sessions? I’ll work with you one on one.”

I sighed, nodding.

Harry clapped a hand on my shoulder before continuing on his way.

~~~~~~~~

Harry and I walked to the Room of Requirement, hidden under his invisibility cloak.

My heart raced as we strode through the empty halls, terrified of encountering a teacher and a little unnerved at being in such close proximity to anyone, let alone Harry Potter.

The Room of Requirement opened and we walked in, the door closing behind us.

Harry pulled the cloak off us and I let out a breath of relief.

“Merlin, that was scary,” I mumbled.

“Sneaking around after hours still unnerves me a little, too,” Harry remarked, dropping the cloak to the side. “It gets easier the more you do it, though.”

I raised an eyebrow at him. “Got it: break the rules more often.”

He deadpanned at me before his expression shifted into a grin. “Very funny.”

I grinned back. “I thought so.”

Harry shook his head, moving to stand beside me. “Alright. I hope you have your wand on you, or we’ll have to sneak all the way back.”

I grimaced, reaching into my pocket and pulling out my wand, a quiet sigh of relief escaping me.

Harry nodded. “Good.” He gestured at me. “Alright, think of your happiest memory.”

I held my wand out in front of me, once more thinking of receiving my letter. “Expecto Patronum!”

Nothing.

Not even sparks.

I huffed.

“That’s okay. Try again,” Harry encouraged.

And so I did.

For half an hour.

“Do you have any happier memories?”

I looked over at Harry.

“Remember, it has to be strong,” he advised.

I huffed, closing my eyes. Getting my letter wasn’t enough. Maybe arriving at Hogwarts? Seeing the school for the first time was definitely one of my favorite memories.

Opening my eyes, I brought my wand forward, a new determination filling me. “Expecto Patronum!”

A few wisps left my wand before dying out.

I pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration.

Harry patted my back. “That was an improvement.”

I whipped my head around to glare at him.

He pulled his hand off me, raising his hands in surrender and taking a step back. “Sorry.”

“I don’t know if I can do this, Harry.”

He pursed his lips. “Let’s go to bed. We’ll try again tomorrow.”

~~~~~~~~~

“Expecto Patronum!”

My wand produced a few wisps, lasting longer than before, but still dying out rather quickly.

Harry chuckled.

“Harry Potter!” I glared at him. “We have been doing this for almost a week- don’t you dare!”

He held up his hands. “Sorry. It’s just… you are possibly the worst I’ve ever trained.”

I deadpanned at him. “Thanks for the encouragement.”

“I think you need some happier memories,” he admitted, his smile fading.

I frowned, looking down at the ground. “Well, I won’t argue with that.”

He walked over to me. “What do you care about? What’s important to you?”

I lifted my gaze to meet his, staring at him in silence for several moments. “My friends. You, Hermione, Ron…”

Harry nodded. “So think of a memory with us. Was there a memory with us that filled you with such a happiness you’d never experienced before?”

I paused, looking away as I tried to think.

Meeting the golden trio was fun. I enjoyed listening to them as they told me about their adventures. Spending time in the library studying. Visits with Hagrid.

Then it came to me.

I remembered the Christmas holiday. I thought back to the warm fire, the tasty cookies I had snuck out of the kitchen, the comfortable silence, the winter coziness that I had shared with Harry.

I had never felt more content in my life.

I looked back up at Harry. Lifting myself to stand tall, I turned back to the open space before me and raised my wand. “Expecto Patronum!”

Pale wisps emerged from my wand, spiraling out.

A chestnut mare formed at the end of them, tossing its head and neighing.

Harry beamed. “You did it, Davies!”

I turned to face him, grinning. Reaching towards him, I pulled him into a tight hug. “Ugh, after weeks-!”

“You did it,” he congratulated, hugging me back.

I sighed in relief, resting my chin on his shoulder.

He mirrored the action for a few moments before we separated. “What was your memory?”

I blinked at him, face flushing. I wrapped him in another hug, just so I didn’t have to look at him.

He stiffened, taken aback, but returned the hug again.

“Do you remember the Christmas holidays…” I trailed off, keeping my arms around him.

I felt him nod against me. “Yeah.”

I paused. “Do you remember the night I stole the cookies from the kitchen? The snow was falling, and the Common Room was decorated…” I tightened my hold of him. “We were sitting on the couch… the whole place to ourselves…”

At Harry’s prolonged silence, I loosened my grip, pulling away slightly, but not enough to look at him.

“Harry?”

“I- I remember.”

I waited a few beats before stepping back so I could look at him.

He met my eyes, but I couldn’t read his expression.

I held his gaze, ignoring the way my voice wavered and my cheeks reddened. “It meant a lot to me, Harry.”

He swallowed. “It meant a lot to me, too.”

Staring at him, I tried to figure out what exactly he was trying to imply by that. I took a step towards him. “Did it,” I asked quietly.

He nodded, his gaze flickering to my lips briefly.

It was all the confirmation I needed.

Leaning forward, I pressed my lips to his, closing my eyes.

He returned it instantly.

Our lips moved together clumsily, but it filled my heart with warmth.

I reached up, resting my left hand on his shoulder and threading my other fingers through the hair on the back of his head.

He placed one hand on my waist, the other cradling my jaw.

I pulled away first, keeping my hold on him as I opened my eyes.

He smiled at me as we both tried to even out our breathing.

I beamed at him, chuckling, and leaned forward to press a quick kiss to his forehead.

Harry met my gaze when I pulled away. “I don’t know if we should have done that.”

My smile dropped instantly, arms falling to my sides.

A mischievous crooked grin formed on his face. “I am your teacher, after all.”

I scoffed loudly, slapping him in the arm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/n: This was really fun to write, too. I've been on a Harry Potter kick, so expect more stories soon.

Oh! And if anyone is curious as to why I chose the patronus I did, I found this life-saver right here.

Tag List:

#Harry Potter #Harry Potter x reader #x reader #reader #reader insert #OC #HP #year 5 #Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix #my works #Mara's works #my imagine #Mara's imagine #my gif #Mara's gif

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flailypichu · 6 months

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Everyone collects themselves after that near death (not even near death, they watched him die and reform) experience and decide to put off the trip to the moon for at least a day, just to breathe and process. And make sure Ashton doesn't explode again. Like, really make sure.

Fearne doesn't make eye contact with him, each clop of her hooves sounding deep in his body as she gets further away. She links arms with Imogen and Laudna, who glance back at them with twin worried and frustrated expressions. Ashton doesn't think he burned any bridges today, but a few of them are heavily singed to match the rest of him.

FCG and Chetney help them up to their rooms, where Lord de Rolo has banished them to recuperate, Lady Allura still stunned behind him while he gave the order, face blank as she processes what could have happened. The smaller members of the group aren't honestly that much help when it comes to his movement, but if FCG could be pale, they would be, so Ashton lets them hold his hand and appreciates the warm flow of healing still being pumped into him.

And that leaves Orym. Quiet by nature, Ashton is disconcerned to find him near silent. He appears to have retreated into some sort of training, because even though he can see Orym moving slightly behind him, the halfling makes no noise. It's not until they reach the room Ashton was sharing with FCG that Orym says "I'll take them. I bought some healing potions before this, that I can use if we need to. You two get some rest, that took a lot out of you, Letters."

FCG pushes one last burst of healing into Ashton and squeezes their hand. With a firmness rarely heard, they say, "we are going to talk about that later. When I've gathered my thoughts." Ashton wants to bring him in for a hug, but the body language says he wouldn't be welcome. Tomorrow, maybe.

The two of them transfer his care to Orym and Chetney gives a small wave, pulling a lingering FCG into his room. Ashton can hear him muttering something to FCG but doesn't try to make it out, focus narrowing to the small figure standing like a statue in front of him.

Orym also hasn't met his eyes once since he opened them. Ashton waits.

With a hand on his thigh, Orym pushes him into the room and shuts the door. The silence presses in on them, and Ashton almost breaks the silence, but knows any words he wants to say need to take a back seat to whatever is brewing in Orym.

"What was that." Orym's voice comes flat like a bit of flint, wanting to be struck. Ashton chooses his words carefully.

"The stronger I am, the better chance we have to win this fight. The shard made me stronger."

"The shard made you dead." And Ashton does flinch at that. A tiny convulsion of muscles he doesn't have, at the pain in Orym's voice that's seeping into the coldness. "You exploded, and you reformed, and we watched while only two of us could do anything at all." His fists shake by his sides and with effort he flexes them and sits down on the bed. Ashton doesn't sit next to him, but on the floor in front, forcing himself to look up into eyes that swell with tears. Ashton makes an aborted movement towards Orym's hands, stopping themselves at the last moment, only for Orym to close the gap and squeeze.

Tears begin to slip silently down his cheeks and Ashton doesn't regret his choice - he's alive, he has more power with which to help his friends - but he regrets that it caused these tears. "I'm alive, I made it. Orym-" and he rocks back with the force of Orym throwing his arms around them. Long buried instincts kick in and he lifts his arms to return the embrace. Orym has always been careful with his touches, especially with Ashton, and the intensity of this one gives him pause. Orym pulls back and runs his hands through his hair, making it stick up with sweat.

"You idiot -" and suddenly Ashton is being kissed for the second time that day. After the shard settled he'd felt warmth flood his body, and then recede to a gentle simmer. It comes rushing back with the feel of Orym's chapped lips pressed to his, and he rests his hands on Orym's waist, unable to do anything more than helplessly kiss back.

And as soon as it started, Orym retreats and is halfway to the door before Ashton stands up with some notion of stopping him. But Orym stops at the threshold, turning back to say, "I don't know if what I'm feeling for you is going anywhere, but you dying before I can figure it out isn't going to help anyone. Stop throwing yourself into danger, Ashton. Please." And with that he's gone.

Ashton stands stock still, lips buzzing, new arm tingling. "Well, fuck."

#cr3 #ashrym #Critical Role #Writing this on my phone with blurry eyes because my computer died and I have to get this scene out of my head #I'll clean it up later #What the fuck was this episode

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lovethebadguy · 1 year

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Alright. I've seen a heck of a lot of gifs and fanart and comics about The Owl House. I'm finally gonna watch it and write down some of my observations.

(spoiler alert, obviously)

• Omfg her name is "loose". I've been pronouncing Luz like it rhymes with "buzz" this entire time.

• Nothing could have prepared me for Hooty's voice. In fact, no one sounds like I thought they would. Eda is Wendie Malick? Was no one going to tell me this?

• I've only known King for five minutes, but if anything happens to him I will kill everyone in this room and then myself.

• King's voice was also not what I was expecting, which in hindsight was foolish of me. I knew it was Alex Hirsch. The Bill Cipher vibe should not have been a surprise.

• When does Hunter get here?

• Amity is the snobby high-achieving school bully?! BUT THE ROMANCE?!

• I know it's coming. I've seen far too many cute fan works of Amity and Luz for that not to be the case.

• SHE SQUISHED KING'S CUPCAKE THOUGH. 😡

• Ahhh. There's a teeeeny tiny glimpse of the Lumity that is to come. All is right with the world.

• Gus is just a little fella. Comics did not fully portray how smol he is.

• When does Hunter get here?

• I am up to episode 16 and I still watch the opening theme in its entirety for three reasons. One: it's fantastic. The music, the animation, it's all tops. Two: I'm waiting to see when/if the image of Amity changes. She still turns her back at the moment, but she's warming up, I know it. And three: the image of King perched on Luz's shoulders just before the title card makes me smile every time. He's so dang cute.

• Ok. So, I obviously already knew from tumblr that The Owl House is beloved, in part, for its representation of LGBTQIA. And now that I'm experiencing it first-hand? I totally get it. Everything feels so natural and understated. Luz blushing when either of the older Blight siblings spoke to her? The short, sweet glances between Luz and Amity? They're all the typical moments you'd expect to see between a male and a female character, and it's honestly so refreshing (and surprising, coming from Disney) to see it happening between two girls in a way that feels real. I am all aboard the Lumity train.

• In the span of 10 minutes, Eda has referred to Luz as "her kid", called herself "mama", and been shown wearing a watch with King's face on it. I love Mama Eda so much.

• DANCE BATTLE DANCE BATTLE DANCE BATTLE DANCE BATTLE DANCE BATTLE

• Amity has fallen so hard and honestly? Same.

• OMG EPISODE 18! I think that was my first glimpse of Hunter! Lilith cursed Eda?! Eda sacrificing herself for Luz! The end credits with that haunting beating of the heart!

• Season 1 is done and dusted! All those feel good family and found-family moments. This show has so much heart. Gravity Falls is one of my favourite shows, and The Owl House seems to share a lot of its tropes and themes. I'm really loving it! I have so many things I should be doing today. Am I going to watch start watching Season 2 instead? Darn tootin.

• ENTIRELY NEW OPENING SEQUENCE!! I love it! Everyone's kicking ass! And Hunter is there!! And they kept the final scene with King on Luz's shoulders!

• They're setting up The Golden Guard as this new, mysterious, powerful rival for Season 2. But I know too much so every little glimpse of him has me sitting here grinning goofily like a proud mum at her son's soccer game.

• Gus is less smol. Kids grow up so fast. :(

• Finally met Amity's parents (beyond the shadows of them we saw in Amity's memory). Odalia sucks. But I officially love one tired dad.

• "Stay away from my Luz!" !!!!!!!

• Baby King is the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life. King is king of MY heart.

• The Hunter episode was everything I ever wanted. He must be protected at all costs.

• Huh. Tumblr gave me a veeerry different impression of what Darius was going to be like. Incoming plot twist?

• LUMITY IS A GO!

• Eda immediately destroying the stress toy because of her need for chaos whilst never once breaking eye contact with Bump nearly killed me. I choked on my tea. Worth it.

• Hunter has just learned the truth. Someone give this kid a hug.

• KING IS A TITAN?! How big is my sweet baby boy gonna get?

• Steve is so cool getting around in his Steve shirt, just doing Steve things. Haha, classic Steve.

• Luz and Amity just shared their first kiss and it was perfect. And I feel like the animation in that scene was extra nice? Maybe it was just me, but it just seemed beautifully bouncy.

• Once again, the near-silent end credits for part one of the finale haunt my soul. Part two now. Bring it on!

• ...Take it back. D:

• That musical montage to kick off Season 3 packed in SO MUCH STORY. Luz coming out as bi and introducing Amity to her mum was incredibly sweet. Vee (who I admit I was a little bit creeped out by until now) has captured my heart. And I absolutely adore the friendship between Gus and Hunter.

• "Time to go home, Flapjack." 😭 HAS THIS BOY NOT BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH?!

• Raine being hearteyes for Harpy Eda, Camila being hearteyes for King, everyone being hearteyes for Stringbean? Mood.

• Obsessed with Eda's haircut.

• My girl Willow has been carrying a lot. Her realising that she needs to let things out and lean on her friends was such a tender moment.

• Willow and Hunter linking their pinkies! ❤

• Not prepared for this amazing show to be over, but here we go...

• Brb, too busy crying.

• Still crying, gimme a minute.

• I was holding it together riiiight up until Flapjack's grave. "Thank you for finding me" broke me.

• Ok. So, generally speaking... this was pretty much everything I wanted in a finale. Happy, healthy relationships, hints at future pairings, redemption for characters who deserved it, and a big middle finger to those who didn't (which, honestly? Refreshing af).

• Eda and King going feral after losing Luz, the reveal of Titan Luz, and the trio coming together to defeat Belos was utter perfection. The animation was on point!

• I am not ashamed to admit I said "NOW EAT THIS, SUCKA!" with Luz.

• Also, the Dad bod, the "Bad Girl Coven" tshirt, and the "I loaf you" pun were exactly what I should've expected from King's dad.

• The time skip end credits were a wonderful way to let us see the characters we know and love, living their best lives. Hunter finally able to exist peacefully, making new palismans with his own little Bluejay on his shoulder (admittedly, I'd hoped he'd get a wolf, but the Bluejay did seem well-suited), Willow and Gus truly coming into their own, Lilith rocking the Harpy form (and hinting a possible romance with Steve?? EDIT: ignore that, I just learned that Lilith is aroace and I am so excited about it.), lil' gangly King growing bigger and stronger... well, I don't need to keep pointing things out. Suffice to say, there were so many little details that worked together to create a beautiful picture.

• In the span of three days, I've watched a show that so many people were obsessed with for years.

• I get it now.

• Thank you Dana Terrace and everybody involved with making The Owl House. The world needs more shows like this, with a great story, genuine characters, represention of people from all walks of life, and heartfelt messages.

• Excuse me while I go and wallow in misery over the fact that it's finished before I start consuming as many fanfics as I can find.

• OH! One final note as someone who learned far too much from tumblr before actually watching the show. I kept seeing fanart that seemed to depict a Hunter lookalike (so, Caleb) and an Eda lookalike, who apparently was Evelyn Clawthorne? CLAWTHORNE?? So here I am waiting for another flashback/memory episode that would lay it all out and do that big reveal BUT APPARENTLY THAT'S FANON??? Y'all had me thinking I'd missed an episode.

#the owl house #luz noceda #amity blight #lumity #eda clawthorne #hunter toh #king toh #my heart is full #the owl house spoilers

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creepling · 7 months

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Do you have any writing tips for newer writers? I love how well-written and immersive all of your work is and I would love to know some of your tips/tricks!

oh idk but i'll try the best i can!! it works differently for each writer but this is some things i think benefit me when i write:

thesaurus' and dictionaries are your best friend!! it's like having a calculator for maths, it helps you so much with finding the right word. or if you're repeating a word too much, you can find another that is similar. there are plenty of resources online and they're pretty up to date nowadays.

read read read. i've noticed reading impacts my writing a lot. this doesn't necessarily mean you have to read 24/7 or read specific things. if you read fanfic, you're already on the path for training your brain to like certain styles and pick up on things like pacing, style, etc that work good in fanfiction.

refer to headcanons. i like to view headcanons as a synopsis for what i like to explore in writing. having headcanons written down or in your head can act as inspiration and an idea. if you can flesh it out, go for it!

also, write all your ideas down. the amount of amazing ideas ive had that have never came to writing bc i forgot to write it as a reminder. notes app is helpful for those awkward moments u get an idea, but don't be hesitant, write that shit down!! it could be a masterpiece.

as for writing itself and making it engaging, honestly idk the overall answer. practice some drabbles and blurbs and find out what you specifically like to write. is it the descriptions of characters or scenario? is it action? train of thought? most writers have that one thing they love to write and others are a pain in the arse.

of course all those aspects are important, but if they become a bit of a slob to write don't waste your time on it. keep it short and sweet, get to the point, then spend your time writing the ascepts that make your work shine.

when you start writing, you might think it's shit. you will be your most harshest critic. it's okay to abandon works and move on, but never delete them!! keep all your progress in case you want to go back to it.

depending on what i'm writing for, my use of language tends to adapt with the source material. i don't do it on purpose, it just feels natural. and it benefits your work in being viewed as "authentic".

for example, since i've been writing for johnny, i've noticed my writing using language similar to how southerners speak, or similar to language conveyed in american literature. so if you wanna make your writing immsersive, that's a good technique to have. but don't get hung up on it too much, writing in your voice is just as important!! make yourself heard<33

immsersiveness can get tricky when talking in second person ("you") since it is a generalisation of the audience. try to stear the depths into the canon and have the reader be the witness of it, like they're stepping into the story.

one last point, proofread!! i use grammarly for rough drafts then i keep rereading and rephrasing until my head explodes. it's the worst part about writing, but it has to be done. you'll be itching to post it for people read it, but make sure everything is correct and you're conveying what you're wanting to say so that comes across to the reader. thankfully the fanfic community have betas, so if you're comfortable having a moot read it for pointers, that's a handy thing to have<33

happy writing, anon<33

#asks #anon

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ofluminance-a · 11 months

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@diablescharmants said: "Your magic has always intrigued me." With two fingers stroking his chin, Freed voiced a thought that he'd harbored in his mind for a long time. He finally felt like this was an appropriate moment to voice it, and also a more direct way of expression his appreciation for Lucy as a person and mage. "Do you want to tell me more about it, perchance?" I would like to hear your thoughts and feeling about it, and possibly some of its exact nature and rules." Surely, this wasn't gonna be a boring conversation but filled with lots of passion.

when the two are sitting in, for once, a very empty guild hall -- lucy is pulled from the notes she's jotting in the margins of her rough draft for her novel by freed's voice. lifting her head off her curled fist beneath her chin, she blinks her dark brown eyes and feels the heat already beginning to waft into her cheeks.

" it.. has? " well this was the first she was hearing of it. though, now that freed had mentioned it, she was rather curious of his own magic. in a lot of ways, both their magic shared similar traits. setting her pen down on her notebook, lucy tilts her head and smiles warmly. it's rare that anyone ever asks her about these sorts of things, and she's more than happy to share!

" well-- sure! i don't mind sharing! but if i tell you about mine, you gotta tell me about yours!! hm, ... let's see. " with a pause, lucy looks across the room, trying to figure out the best explanations she can. " well, celestial spirit magic is a little different than a lot of the magic that our friends in fairy tail use. my magic requires physical keys! finding each one is kind of a cool little journey, too! there are silver and gold keys. the silver keys are more common and the gold, rare. with me so far? " smiling, lucy pulls her keys out of the pouch at her hip to show freed her examples.

" so after a celestial spirit mage finds a key, immediately upon finding it, we have to summon the spirit and create a contract with them. we have to discuss the days i am able to summon the spirit, and any other important notes! then, once the contract is made, the more that i train and work with each individual spirit, the stronger they and i become! " smiling proudly, lucy looks down at her keys wistfully as she tucks them back away.

" honestly? all my spirits have helped me get stronger over the years! i really am lucky to have become such great friends with them all. from stories i've been told or even witnessed myself, not all celestial spirit mages treat their spirits with the respect they deserve. " looking back at freed, lucy starts once more. " why the sudden urge to understand how my magic works? are you studying up for a new mission? "

#oh this was fun to write #i even double checked myself with wiki lmao #diablescharmants #freed tag tba #⋆ ― ✧ way up. way up. way up to the moon! / answered ask.#⋆ ― ✧ m: lucy heartfilia.#⋆ ― ✧ zodiac princess. / lucy heartfilia.

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alters-journal · 1 year

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🐈‍⬛ If you have an inner world did an alter consciously create it? And is anyone able to change it at will?

Okay so our inner world is actually pretty interesting and has evolved over the years. I've been waiting for an excuse to talk about it. >:) *Dr. Eggman voice* YOU FOOL! YOU'VE ACTIVATED MY TALK ABOUT SOMETHING IN GREAT DETAIL MODE! MUAHAHAH! Thank you.

Okay so I've been able to access our inner world for quite some time. I usually did so when I was asleep, or going to sleep, to lessen dissociation. However, the inner world has undergone a lot of change from when I could first access it as a child.

My first experience with the inner world was in the 6th grade. I was going to sleep one night and found myself waking up in a completely pitch black area on a bed I barely recognized. At the foot of the bed was some sort of demon (who I assume is an alter who hasn't made themself known yet) telling me everything was gonna be okay. Things were tough at school and I was getting in way over my head doing things I shouldn't have been doing outside of school. Another what I can only assume was an alter at the time took the form of the grim reaper and talked to me too. Both the "demon" and the "reaper" asked me if I really wanted to continue doing the things I was doing. I told them I did. I felt disappointment from both of them. They told me to go sit by the stream and think about some things.

From then on whenever I needed to calm down I'd close my eyes and imagine myself at that stream in the pitch black area with the reaper and or the demon. I honestly hope they come back around they were chill.

(Fun note: They were both around BEFORE my emo phase begun so....)

At one point I stopped going in to the inner world because I convinced myself it was childish, just like having alters. I knew about some of them as early as the third grade but come middle school I thought I had to "grow up" and leave a lot of that behind. So, just like them, I stopped going in to my headspace.

UNTIL I became obsessed with Gravity Falls in the 7th grade.

In the 7th grade I was hanging out with this psychotic dude who was honestly my closest friend. He had a delusional attachment to Bill Cipher and I just went with it. There wasn't really terms for "fictokin" "DA" and "IRL" at the time so I just thought he was an extreme LARPer. Anyways, I might have a factroject of him I don't really know, but bc I was obsessed and BFFs with a Bill Cipher IRL and I had a Tumblr at the time guess who I introjected. You get ONE guess.

Anyway, Bill has since then fused and it was sad to see him go but we all knew it was necessary. He wanted to fuse so yk. Healing healing etc.

But before all that, Bill got bored and decided it'd be best to fuck around with our headspace and BOY did he fuck around with it.

Anyway, this all starts to read like a bill cipher x reader fanfic but fuck it man I was 13 and cringe culture is dead.

I went to bed one night and woke up in the dirt this time. I looked up at a blue, slightly clouded, sky. Bill poked his head over me and asked me if I was okay before helping me up and showing me around. He asked, and I'll never forget it;

"So, whaddya think? I did it while you were at school cause I thought it needed some spicing up."

I looked around at the intense complexity of it. Birds in the distance, trees surrounding us, dirt pathways, nature calling and filling my ears. A rich, earthy sent filled my lungs. It was extremely vivid, I had no idea my mind was even capable of creating something so complex and real.

"I love it." I whispered. I remember crying a little too.

"It's your mind. You deserve to feel at home and comfortable in it." Bill said patting me on the back.

Then he showed me around. There was a train station. A train that would show me more to headspace. Its tracks went in a loop that edged closer to the mountains in the distance. Bill said they were mostly decorative and unreachable. He showed me the "consciousness shack". It was located on one end of the mindscape as we called it at the time. I'd go in to become conscious. AKA, that's where the front was. Near the front however there was this dark part of the forest that always made me feel uneasy. He told me I shouldn't go near there. Still to this day that part of headspace makes me uneasy but I sure as hell aint brave enough to go look.

He showed me the cliff with the dream mist last. Its this weird part of headspace where you can kind of walk off a cliff and be drifted into unconsciousness. If you REALLY wanna have lucid dreams that night you gotta go walk off the cliff. The mist carries you and you just lose feeling. It's strangely relaxing. I think its a lot of fun personally.

Anyway, 7th grade was coming to an end when I thought It was time for me to move past my "daydreams" with the ever famous tumblr sexyman. To move on from my fun little "daydream world". I was an adult now after all! /sar. But for some reason I couldn't. My friend was slowly moving on from his own Bill Cipher phase. Why couldn't I?

I remember we got into an argument one night. I told him he wasn't real and that I had to move on and grow up. He demanded that he was real. After the fight he did something he later admitted was petty. Before he fused we all made up. He said

"If you're so damn sure that all of this is fake, that all my hard work for you is just a figment of YOUR imagination DESPITE your breathlessness the moment you stepped foot in MY creation-" He paused to catch his breath. "If you want to be the only one here so bad then see how long you last without us!"

And with that he slammed the door to the shack and I woke up in a cold sweat. I wasn't entirely sure who or where I was but the inner world was inaccessible from that moment forward until I realized I was a system a few years ago. When I even learned that systems had a headspace.

It had been years and I had long since forgotten the richness of what the world once was. I found myself in a small, dimly lit, wooden cabin with a few other people. Two doors lead somewhere. One to dormancy and one to a place we were too scared to go to. It was new to all of us and we didn't want to risk anything. What if something terrible happened when we opened that unknown door? We were scared of it. But, as more alters returned from dormancy our little shack grew. Soon it became apparent that this little one room cabin wasn't going to cut it for all of us.

I took it up as my duty as a host to open the door and see what was out there for myself. Low and behold, not a thing changed. The world was the same as the day I left it.

The gatekeepers worked on expanding the cabin, we now have an upper floor designated to all of our bedrooms. Only the gatekeepers can alter headspace itself. Not even I can change the space we occupy.

Not long after the discovery of the outdoors Bill came back and we made peace with each other. He told me once again that he had created this world for me, for all of us. He thought after all we suffered we deserved somewhere to go and feel at peace in our own mind. And thats what it still is today. Headspace is an escape for all of us when things get too tough in the real world. Its a nice thing to have honestly.

More recently, an alter named Snow, ventured to the bottom of the cliff. He discovered it was actually a ravine that served as an excellent pathway to the mountains and as a backdoor to dormancy. He recommended that nobody should really go there because the mountains are freezing.

Last month Marquet showed me something. Hidden by some of the trees he found the old stream, now flowing like a river. It's a fun little spot to sit and relax at so we're clearing a pathway to there so its easier to get to.

And last week Marquet showed me something else. He flew me up above the dream mist by the cliff and showed me that there is still more land to be discovered. Snow said he'd go out and explore it sometime soon so, there's even more to our headspace we'll be discovering soon.

ANDDDDDD that's the chronicles of our headspace. Thanks for coming to my TEDtalk.

#headspace #asks #endos dni #sorry not sorry

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haxxy · 2 years

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Hi sorry I'm the anon who asked about hrt, I was asking because I've seen you mention considering it in the past! I'm actually nb and on hormones myself- I realize it's none of my business what you do with your body, but I've been following you for years and was just genuinely curious! I'm so sorry if I made you uncomfortable, obviously you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to! Anyways all the love and luck to you! I think you're super cool, have a good night! :)

Dw about it! You didn't make me uncomfortable at all, and honestly my first reaction to the ask was to take it in good faith! I've just been blocking a lot of shitty people lately, so I was a bit hesitant to reply given the existence of like... truscum and such. You know how it is, lol

I don't mind talking about this sort of thing, although it is pretty complicated for me! So for anon, and anyone else who's interested in knowing this sort of stuff, I'll put my response under a read more.

Okay sooo.... the long and short of it is that it's a tricky thing for me to approach

To start with, I have PCOS and therefore have a naturally elevated testosterone level, so theoretically there was already a point in my life where I was experiencing what small doses of T would probably do to me. Some of the stuff I really loved (facial hair, a lower voice register) and gave me a ton of gender euphoria, but some of it was annoying or even distressing (such as having a ton of acne and hair loss). Because of the latter symptoms, I actually ended up getting onto medication (progesterone and spiro -- isn't that funny, it's like HRT in the wrong direction), and while it was really upsetting (and dysphoria inducing) to watch some of the things I like vanish due to my medication (especially my ability to speak/sing in lower octaves godddd give it back), I had weighed the consequences and am generally happier now that my head isn't shedding hair like a motherfucker. This has been something I've thought about a lot in relation to HRT -- if I were to get on it, I would end up reversing the progress I've made with medication and I already know that as much as some of the parts of being on T make me happy, other parts make me miserable. Not to sound so typically nonbinary, but god do I wish that you could just check boxes and pick the parts of transitioning that you want, it would make it so much easier.

Idk, I guess all of that is to say that I don't really mind the way my body is currently, and whatever changes I might like to make are the type of thing that are small enough to sacrifice or can be replicated in other ways, like voice training (which I honestly should start trying to do). I could talk about all of the other stuff that goes with this, like feeling dysphoria for something on one day + then liking it about myself on another day (being nb isn't simple, is it), or the fact that I've actually gotten more comfortable presenting in a femme way (clothes wise) after gaining an understanding of my gender, or how I likely won't socially transition outside of my friend groups (and the internet) because god would be exhausting to explain my identity to people over and over again, but... maybe that's a story for another day, lol

TL;DR If HRT was a character customization screen, I'd jump on that shit, but unfortunately testosterone wants to make me BALD

#haxxy stop #thanks for taking the time to send another ask! sorry if I seemed snippy in my first reply

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helloalycia · 3 years

Text

The Wrong Lifetime – Five // Wanda Maximoff

chapter four | story masterlist | main masterlist | wattpad | chapter six

author’s note: dying of cramps but didn’t wanna leave y’all hanging, so enjoy! x

Taking Wanda to Blackpool was something I couldn't stop thinking about for the past three days.

I kept telling myself that I had to remain calm, not make her feel uncomfortable with my obvious attraction to her, and to give her the best day out considering she'd never been before. It wasn't anything more than a girl spending time with her soon-to-be sister-in-law, and I had to keep reminding myself that whenever I'd feel a stir of desire in my chest at the thought her pretty smile or intoxicating gaze.

My family were thrilled when they heard of my plans with Wanda. My parents were glad I was actually making an effort to get on with her, whilst my brother was excited I was becoming 'best friends', as he put it, with his fiancé. That one stung a little, the guilt pricking my insides, but I convinced myself that that was exactly what I was doing. It wasn't wrong if I didn't think of Wanda in any way but what she was. Right?

The weekend came around quickly enough, and on Saturday morning, I met with Wanda at the train station where she waiting for me with an enthusiastic smile.

"I brought my watercolours and sketchbook so I can paint what's there," she explained as we boarded the train. "I also bought a lot of pencils in case some snap. I'm gonna draw everything I see so I don't forget a single thing."

We slid into our seats and I smiled with admiration as she continued to ramble about all of the things she wanted to do today. She looked so lively when she spoke, her hands moving about frantically to express her excitement, and her lips permanently etched into a smile when she wittered on. I didn't mean to stare, but God, she looked beautiful.

"Thank you again for doing this," she finished, head turning to mine.

Now, I'd read and written many clichés of someone falling for someone else, particularly the moment they knew they were too far gone. It was hard to believe if they were true depictions of liking someone, but I liked reading and writing them.

It was now that I learnt that they were no exaggeration, for when she looked my way with a beaming smile and glowing green eyes, I knew it was too late. There was no going back for my attraction to Wanda.

"No need to thank me," I spoke slowly, surprised I could speak at all since she'd knocked the breath from my lungs. "I'm glad you're excited."

The journey was a few hours long and we made conversation the whole way. It was the longest I'd spent alone with her since meeting her and I was intrigued by everything she had to say, hanging onto every word with all of my attention. If that wasn't enough, her accent only made everything she said sound so much better. She was naturally soft-spoken, but syllables rolled off her tongue in a silky, raspy way with her accent entwined in her words. I loved it.

At one point, the topic of our families came up and I felt like my brother came up in almost every conversation I'd had with anyone who discussed family, so I took this as my opportunity to get to know hers instead.

"What's it like to have a twin?" I asked, leaning on my elbow as I watched her attentively.

She mirrored my action playfully, though answered my question. "It's just like having a normal sibling, except they're way more annoying."

I smiled, imaging just how annoying Pietro could be as a sibling.

"I love Pietro, but he's very frustrating at times," she spoke with a hint of endearment. "He constantly throws it in my face that's he's older than me by twelve minutes. As if that makes a difference."

A chuckle flew from my lips as she pouted at her own words.

"But he's also my best friend," she said with a sigh, like that fact was irritating in itself. "He knows me better than anyone and he's the easiest person for me to talk to. I don't have to hide anything from him." She paused, glancing upwards in thought. "Well, almost anything."

Pursing my lips, I wondered what she meant as she mumbled the last part, but didn't question it. Everyone was entitled to their secrets.

"So, you and your family moved to England when you were kids, right?" I tried to recall what my parents had told me of them. "From Sokovia."

"Yes, we were about..." She scrunched up her nose as she tried to remember. "Eight years old, I think?"

"Wow, that's young," I realised.

She hummed in agreement, smile fading as her eyes fell to her hands. "Yeah... I don't remember much, but there was a lot of unrest at the time. A war. It was dangerous for everyone and my parents were lucky to get us out when they did."

I frowned, knowing some of this already, but it was sadder to hear when it was coming from Wanda herself.

"Our extended family didn't make it out," she continued to explain, voice quieter. "I didn't know them much, my parents' siblings, so it's not that sad for me. Pietro, too. But it's strange to think, you know? Especially when all of your family are around with this wedding and–" She sighed, shaking her head and looking to me with an apologetic smile. "Sorry, I didn't mean to bring the mood down."

I straightened up, reassuring her instantly. "Wanda, you don't need to apologise. It's okay. I... I didn't know any of that. I'm glad you told me."

She nodded, though the regret was still present in her gaze.

"I'm sorry all of that happened," I expressed honestly, not looking away. "But I'm glad you're here, if it makes a difference. You– your family are good people."

A small, appreciative smile graced her lips. "Thank you."

I shrugged, trying to brush it off so she wouldn't notice the heat rising up my neck. "It's nothing... so Sokovia. You speak Russian and English. That's pretty bloody cool."

She laughed wholeheartedly and any hint of sadness disappeared from her face, reassuring me completely. I didn't like to see her sad, especially when there was nothing I could do to make her feel better that I knew of.

"I promise to teach you some Russian today," she said with amusement. "A few words, just to diversify your vocabulary."

"Gee, thanks."

Another laugh escaped her and I chewed on my lip to contain my grin. I could get used to that sound.

—

When we reached Blackpool, Wanda was radiating with excitement. We couldn't make it two steps anywhere before she whipped out her sketchbook and began to sketch. She wasn't kidding when she said she was going to capture everything she saw.

I was patient, since the reason we came was for her, and watched as she worked. It was cute, seeing her concentrate and trying to stop dancing around with excitement every time I showed her something new.

We walked along the promenade and dipped in and out of the shops, looking at the gifts and clothes they sold. We bought a few things to commemorate the trip, but then Wanda was quick to drag me back outside so she could sketch the view of the beach from where we were stood. The grin on her face was convincing enough for me to let her drag me wherever she wanted. She looked so happy and I didn't care about anything else.

Eventually, around lunchtime, we headed to a café to have a break from all the excitement. Or rather, a break from running around. For Wanda, it was a better opportunity to sit still and sketch some more.

"So, you're drinking what, Y/N?" she asked, not looking up from her sketches as she worked.

I looked at my tea and lowered the cup. "Er, tea?"

"In Russian," she instructed.

"Oh." I cleared my throat, remembering what she taught me earlier. "Chay."

"And what's in the chay?" she asked, lifting her eyes to meet mine patiently. "The milk?"

"Moloko," I remembered, and the proud smile on her face reassured me I was correct. My shoulders relaxed as I returned her smile. "Thanks."

"You're a natural," she assured me, before looking back to her sketchbook. "I only taught you the words. You remembered it yourself. And before you know it, ty budesh' govorit' polnymi predlozheniyami na russkom."

My mouth opened with confusion, not knowing what she said. She seemed to realise as she chuckled at my expression.

"Never mind, milaya (darling)," she said with humoured eyes, before resuming her sketching.

I breathed out, taking another sip of my tea before grabbing a fork to dig into my pasta. As I chewed, I watched Wanda move her pencil effortlessly, creating lines that somehow resulted in a perfect drawing of the horizon.

"Do you only draw and paint landscapes?" I asked curiously.

"I can do portraits, too," she answered with a nod, glancing at me. "But they're never as good."

I gave her a knowing look. "I doubt that."

She merely smiled in response, eyes meeting mine for a moment, before shaking her head with amusement and looking back to her sketches. I chuckled, leaving her to it as I enjoyed my lunch and read the newspaper.

It was nice to just sit and enjoy each other's company as we did our own thing. I'd occasionally glance up to see Wanda focused on her drawing and smile, allowing myself to appreciate the sight, before looking back down to the paper and enjoying my pasta.

By the time I finished my food, as had Wanda, she straightened up and tore a page from her sketchbook. The noise pulled me from my reading and I looked up to see her holding the paper towards me.

I quirked a brow, but she simply shook the paper, signalling for me to take it. With confusion, I took it and became speechless when I saw what she'd drawn. It was me reading the paper, the exact view she must have had from being sat opposite me. It looked exactly like me, probably better since I knew I didn't look that good, and I was amazed at her talent all over again.

"You did this just now?" I asked with disbelief, looking up at her.

She shrugged and distracted herself with her pencil. "Yeah, it's not much. It's not my specialty."

I scoffed. "You're kidding. Wanda, this is amazing!"

Bashful smile on her lips, she glanced up at me. "Maybe it's the best portrait I've done. But I think that's down to my subject."

Even when she was embarrassed, she was still capable of turning the tables on me, leaving me a flustered mess. It was like her superpower. A very annoyingly cute superpower.

"That's what you look like y'know," she continued, nodding to the paper in my hand. "When you're focused on reading. You chew your lip with thought. And you get this little crease–" she pointed between her brows with a laugh, "–right here, and you seem to forget that anything else exists."

A sweet smile spread on her face as she tilted her head, watching me with intimidating eyes, very much aware of the effect her words had on me.

"You're very observant," I said, trying not to stutter, her gaze making me nervous. "Perfect skill for an artist."

She hummed in agreement, though didn't look away. "Mere artistic observation, right?"

My heart was hammering in her chest the longer she stared, especially when her words dawned on me. I'd said the exact same thing after she confronted me about picking her ring. I wondered if she could hear my heart pounding in my ears.

Just like the first time I saw her, I was at a loss for words and couldn't look away. She was compelling, beautiful and remarkable all at once.

—

"Nebo," I said, hoping it was the correct word for 'sky' in Russian, as Wanda had taught me.

She grinned. "Yes! And horizon?"

I pulled a face as I thought carefully. "Er...gorizont?"

"The student is soon to become the master," she said, and I rolled my eyes, knowing that was anything but the truth. I appreciated her encouragement though.

"Okay, before we head to the beach, we have to buy some rock," I told her, leading her to the stall on the promenade. "I got it last time and it's so good."

She furrowed her brows. "What's that?"

I smiled at her expression. "It's a sweet. Kind of like boiled sugar that's formed into a stick of, well, rock."

She didn't seem convinced. "If you say it's good, I trust you, I guess..."

I laughed, grabbing her hand and tugging her to the stall. "You'll love it."

After getting two sticks of rock for Wanda and I, we began to walk to the sand. I glanced at the brunette, wanting to see her reaction. She eyed the hard candy before attempting to bite it, a small piece breaking off at the top. Crunching on it, she scrunched her nose up.

"It's hard," she noted, swallowing the piece. "Tasty, though."

"It's better if you suck on it, love," I let her know with a hidden smile. "Tastes much better."

She did as I said, beginning to suck on the top, and seemed to enjoy it more. Giving me a thumbs up as she sucked it, I couldn't help but laugh again. She looked adorable, so I left her to it and did the same as we walked along the sand and towards the benches in the distance.

Like a child experiencing something for the first time, she began to point excitedly at Blackpool Tower and the ferris wheel in the distance and I just kept nodding along, letting her get excited because it made my heart skip a beat every time she flashed me a smile.

When we reached the benches, I was glad that today wasn't a busy day. It wasn't exactly tourist season, so the beach was scarce of anyone but residents of the town. And even then, our side of the beach was pretty empty, giving us first dibs on a bench that wasn't broken or uncomfortable.

Settling on it, Wanda pulled her legs up and sat cross-legged so she could lean on them and pull out her watercolours. I sat beside her and leaned back, inhaling the salty air and exhaling peacefully. I never had much reason to visit here apart from when my parents took my brother and I on the occasional trip, but it was nice to appreciate the sound of the ocean washing over the sand and the seagulls squawking in the sky. A big difference compared to back home.

Another silence formed between us as she painted the water ahead, and I couldn't help but glance her way, watching her pucker her lips with concentration. All she'd wanted was this and I was glad I could finally give it to her.

So she wouldn't notice, I looked away and stared out at the blue expanse of ocean before me. I should have been appreciating its beauty, but all I could think about was how it was no contest to the girl sat beside me.

"I'm really glad you brought me here today," she said out of the blue after a while, "but I wouldn't have said yes if I'd known you would be bored."

I looked to her and saw she was still preoccupied by her painting. "I'm not bored. We came here so you could see the water and find some new subjects to paint. And that's exactly what we're doing."

She sighed, looking up at me with a questioning glance.

Smiling reassuringly, I said, "I like the quiet. And I like watching you work. You look happy. It's good to see."

She tensed her jaw, stifling a smile, but her eyes said it all. She was grateful. Of course, her eyes were also very easy to get lost in, even if she didn't mean for me to. And right now, under the sun, I found myself drowning in pools of blue.

"What are you thinking?" she asked quietly, a hint of a smile on her face.

Stupidly, I felt compelled to tell her the truth. "I'm thinking about how you have really pretty eyes."

Attempting to make me flustered yet again, her favourite hobby by now I was guessing, she raised a brow teasingly. "Oh, really?"

It didn't bother me this time though, as I maintained eye contact and felt my heart swelling with adoration. "Yes. It's like you hold all the elements in a single gaze."

Her smile faded and that's when I realised what I'd said, my heart dropping to my stomach in an instant. Swallowing hard, I looked away and shook my head. An apology was waiting on the tip of my tongue when she spoke with realisation.

"It was you."

I glanced her way nervously. "What was?"

She was staring like her mind was working something out and I was the missing piece. "The letter that Y/B/N gave me last week. He wrote the exact same thing. What you just said."

My brows knitted together with confusion, then it hit me. The love letter Y/B/N wrote. The one he assured me was for his own eyes. He'd given it to her. And I'd just gone and said the exact thing he'd written on it, no doubt passing it off as is his own words.

"Th–that wasn't me," I got out, shaking my head slowly. "I didn't even know he gave you a letter, Wanda."

She continued to watch me, eyes squinting with scepticism. I swallowed hard under her gaze, trying to think of how I could come back from this. But apparently I didn't have to, because she suddenly leaned forward and pressed her lips to mine.

My mind was foggy when her fingers rested behind my neck, tugging me closer. I closed my eyes, melting at her touch, and began to kiss her back, moving my lips against hers. She was slow and gentle with me, her lips as soft as they looked and sending the butterflies in my stomach into a frenzy. I could have kissed her forever and been content, but my brain finally caught up to my actions and I reluctantly pulled away, stunned.

Glancing around to make sure nobody saw us – there was literally nobody here – I caught my breath and looked back to Wanda. Her eyes were drawn to my lips before they flickered to meet mine, darkened with desire.

"Why did you do that?" was all I could think to ask, and I was acutely aware of her fingers still grasping my neck, the skin burning where her tips grazed.

She licked her swollen lips, expression softening. "I think I've been falling for the wrong Y/L/N."

My lips pressed together, missing the feeling of hers against them. Never in a million years did I expect her to say something like that. I thought she'd been teasing me this whole time, but now, maybe there was truth to her actions.

"Did you really mean what you said?" she asked apprehensively.

"What?"

She swallowed. "What you said about my eyes. Did you mean it?"

Well, she'd kissed me, so there was no going back now.

I nodded, noticing the hesitance in her eyes. "Yes... you're beautiful, Wanda."

She didn't say anything and the silence was deafening. I almost wanted to run back home and pretend this never happened, but that was the cowardly side of me. The other side, the disbelieving side, wanted to stay here with her and keep living in this little bubble we'd created.

"Can I kiss you again?" she finally spoke, eyes flickering between mine for confirmation.

Not trusting myself to speak, I nodded slowly, and she didn't waste another second as she leaned in once again. This time, I wasn't so surprised, so I kissed her back quickly, trying not to think about how wrong this was. How I'd been taught that this was wrong. Because I refused to believe this was wrong, that it was a sin, when it felt so damn right.

Wanda felt right.

—

When I got home later that afternoon, I couldn't stop myself from smiling.

Wanda was all that was on my mind. Everything about her was floating around up there – the contagiousness of her smile, the brightness of her eyes, the taste of her lips. When I left this morning, I wasn't expecting to return with– well, I wasn't sure what we were, but we'd decided to give whatever this was a go.

Of course, she was still engaged to my brother, but I tried not to think about that. She made me happy and maybe in a different lifetime we could have been together, but this was the wrong lifetime which meant I'd have to make some wrong decisions, this possibly being one of them.

The guilt was still present, but the adoration I had for Wanda overpowered it. The fact that she actually liked me back was too thrilling for me to even concern myself with the lack of future this relationship would have. I just wanted to enjoy what we had whilst we had it, even if it meant being together in secret.

"So, how did your trip go?" my mum asked me when I returned, looking up from her knitting.

I stifled my grin the best I could. "It was fun. Wanda loved the seaside."

My mother seemed pleased as she smiled my way. "Y/N, that's great. You know, I'm really proud of you for making an effort with her. It means a lot to everyone."

"Mhm."

"She's going to be your sister-in-law after all," she continued knowingly, "so it's good you're spending time with her. Maybe you could do it more."

I hummed in agreement, my heart fluttering at the possibility of spending more time with Wanda. "Yeah, that could be good."

"Go on upstairs, you must be tired from the travelling," she said after a moment, noticing my distant headspace. "I'm glad you had fun today."

Wanda's smile appeared in my mind again, her lips ghosting my own. I sighed contently.

"Me, too."

#wanda maximoff au #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff #scarlet witch imagine #scarlet witch #elizabeth olsen x reader #elizabeth olsen imagine #elizabeth olsen #marvel #marvel imagine

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ace-nlis · 3 years

Text

How they met you & fell in love

a/n: This is the first time I decided to actually write something with the intention of posting it. I hope that whoever reads this enjoys it. I'm sorry if I've misspelled anything, English isn't my first language. I hope I did well for my first writing post >.<

WARNINGS: none apart from slight violence. Female reader. Cussing.

Otherwise; fluffy content.

(Y/n) - Your name

(L/n) - Last name

Like or repost if you enjoy <3

Akaashi:

When you first met him, you thought he was a pretty boy with a resting bitch face. He is an extremely straight forward 'say it how it is' type of person and you respected him for that because it isn’t always easy to just speak your mind upfront in this day and age. He didn’t really look all that friendly or approachable, but since you were friends with Bokuto you just had to suck it up and stick around. It was pretty awkward talking to him or even just being around him at first, until you realized that his exterior was an act and he’s a total softy when he isn’t trying to call Bo out on his bullshit. You found him to be an intriguing person, but also rather intimidating. He was peaceful, he didn’t talk all that much and kept to himself like a true introvert. You were the opposite, more of an ambivert type. You tried your best to befriend him, but little did you know that friendship would spiral into something else along the line.

After a while of being friends, Akaashi got red in the ears in your presence. He was easily flustered around you, and the both of you often tended to flirt and bicker as if it was second nature. The two of you in a room together never got boring. Everyone around you could tell the two of you were head over heels for each other. You thought the opposite though, you felt that the friendship was never going to progress into anything more and that your crush was meaningless because nothing would come of it. After being friends for several months, nearly reaching the 1 year milestone, you eventually started to distance yourself.

You always thought the way Akaashi acted around you was purely just because the two of you had a close bond as friends, nothing more, nothing less. Akaashi on the other hand was devastated when he noticed the drastic changes in the close bond you both shared. He noticed that whenever he walked into a room, you’d disappear. Whenever he tried to call you, you wouldn’t answer the phone and make up some excuse that you were busy. The poor guy felt like his sanity was hanging on a thread and all he wanted was to speak to you, figure out what he did wrong and at least go back to how things once were. One day, he cornered you in an empty classroom. His eyes seemed frantic and he made sure to trap you between his arms and leave no room for you to escape so he could get answers. “(Y/n), are you okay? Why have you been avoiding me? Did I do something wrong?”

It seemed like the questions that were wracking his brain kept tumbling out, and in an overwhelmed panic she stopped him. The next thing the both of them knew was that her lips were pressed to his. At first his eyes were wide and body was stiff with shock. He didn’t know how to respond, and he firmly believed that this was a dream. In her mind, she thought she had just made the biggest mistake of her life because he wasn’t responding to it, he was just standing there and embarrassment slowly started to flood her. Before she could pull away from him, his arms slackened and his hands slid down the wall beside her, eventually placing them on her hips and pulling her body flush against his while kissing her back feverishly. When the two pulled away, they were out of breath and their eyes had a dazed look in them as they locked eyes. He leaned his head against hers and sighed in relief, his arms wrapped tightly around her waist as he kept his eyes locked on hers. I think that’s when you both knew that there was no way in hell you’d let go of each other at any point in time because it really felt like you were meant to be together.

Oikawa:

You knew of Oikawa Tooru but you never actually wanted to be acquainted with him. To you he sounded like a total sleazebag, a player that loved breaking female students’ hearts left and right. Unfortunately for you, you just so happened to bump into him on Valentines day after having to reject a poor freshman. When you bumped into Oikawa, he thought that you were another girl ready to confess to him due to the box of chocolates in your hands and a smirk instantly made its way onto his face as he reached over to take the box. Your immediate response was to slap his hand away. If looks could kill, he sure as hell would be more than 6 feet under because you were not up for anyone's bullshit. Oikawa gasped in shock and retracted his hand immediately with a pout. “Hey! I know you. You’re (L/n), hmm. Aren’t you a friend of Iwa? You know, you don’t have to be embarrassed about trying to confess to me. I always appreciate a new follower.”

A mix between a scoff and a laugh of disbelief made its way out of you as you immediately shoved the box of chocolates into your bag. “Wow, I knew you were vain but I guess I underestimated just how much. If you think I have any interest in an asshole like you then you must be smoking something. I have no interest in being one of your petty little toys that you hold on a string. I refuse to be one of your little puppets that follow you around to show my undying admiration for someone as shitty as you. No wonder he calls you Shittykawa. You truly are a self centered douche.”

Oikawa’s face was burning red with embarrassment as she pushed past him and continued going to her class. He was astonished, shocked beyond any words imaginary as he stood there and tried to process what had just happened. Eventually he was brought back to his senses when Iwaizumi smacked him over the head and told him to stop staring like a dumbass and get to practice. “Iwa, How do you know (L/n)?” He asked suddenly after they walked in silence for several minutes, which was very unlike Oikawa. “I’m in the majority of her classes and she lives a block away from me. Why?”

“She’s weird. I thought she was gonna confess and then she slapped my hand and called me a douche.” Oikawa said, his tone was completely flat for once and Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow at his friend. “Yeah, well what do you expect? She has better things to do than fawn over you, Shittykawa.”

*Insert offended Oikawa noises here*

Needless to say, his first encounter with you was not exactly what he would’ve liked it to be. Slowly though he tried to fish more information out on you, he wanted to understand why you weren’t like the other girls who practically fell in love with him at first sight and why you were the way that you were in general. That meant that any time Iwaizumi would meet up with you at a park to study together or whenever you guys would spend any type of time together that Tooru would tag along. Teachers thought that you were having a blooming friendship with him though and much to your dismay you ended up getting partnered with him on a school project. You felt sick to the pit of your stomach because you truly didn’t want him to come to your home, but he kept insisting and you knew that there would be no point in trying to convince him otherwise so you gave in to his stubbornness.

You felt ashamed the moment he stepped through the front door, your parents were never home and you had to take care of your younger twin siblings. The house was a mess, and that was when he understood why you had such a cold persona around others. You wanted to distance yourself from people and push them away as much as possible in order for you to not have to go through the embarrassment of looking like a train wreck to everyone else in the circumstances that you were in as opposed to your usual well put together attitude. To your surprise though, he was patient. He jumped in on helping you clean, he even helped the twins with any homework questions they had in between working on your project together and showed no judgement. In fact, he gave you a look of understanding.

After that, you were able to tolerate him more and you allowed him to visit the twins more often while even bringing along his nephew for all of them to play together. He taught them how to play volleyball while also helping you in the kitchen when you needed it. He didn’t want to admit it, but he honestly fell in love with you because of how genuine you were. You guys flirted, but it was suffocating to him like all the other girls who flirted with him on a daily basis. He only had interest in you, and you bet your ass Iwa teased the shit out of him for it. Your project got an incredible score of 100% and the two of you celebrated together by playing some volleyball even though you were complete shit at it. He didn’t care though and had fun. You found yourselves hanging a lot more often, being around each other almost 24/7 and you even met his family at some point. They absolutely loved you, and so did he.

He tried to figure out how he’d confess to you, he wanted it to be special. He wanted it to be a moment the both of you would remember because he quite honestly couldn’t see him spending any of his time with any other girl apart from you. Of course he was extremely nervous and skeptical on how to approach it, it was a 50/50 chance of you liking him back. The thoughts left his mind when he heard your voice outside a local supermarket, asking someone to leave you alone and that immediately flipped a switch in his brain. He quickly tried to look for you and found you trying to tell some tipsy guy that you didn’t want anything to do with him to which he immediately went over with his hands tucked in his pocket.

“Hey (Y/n), everything okay?” he asked as he coldly stared at the man that had been harassing you. A quiet “Oh thank god” was whispered underneath your breath as you managed to force your way closer to Tooru. He immediately wrapped one arm around your waist and kept his eyes locked on the other older gentleman that had been bothering you. The guy smirked, “Oh nothing man, I was trying to have a chat with her and she got all bitchy. That’s all.” (Y/n) could feel his body language immediately became a lot more tense, but you quickly pulled at him and tried to evade the situation. “It’s not worth it, Tooru. Let’s just go, okay? We can get some milk bread and watch movies or something.”

“I don’t appreciate the way you talk about my (Y/n)-chan. In fact, I’d advise you to leave her alone before I make you regret even breathing the same air as her. Got that?” He spoke calmly as he gently nudged you out of the alleyway next to the store. “Hey, who the hell do you think you are? Huh? Can’t just take my woman like that, dude.” This is when you truly saw how angry Oikawa could get as all he did was throw a punch and the guy was down. You could only stare in shock at what had just unfolded in front of you. “If you ever talk about her like that again I swear I’ll make you regret you ever existed.” At that he tugged you along and when the two of you were a few blocks away you grabbed hold of his hand and inspected it. “You seriously didn’t have to go that far. I don’t care what a low life has to say about me, at least I don’t live in the streets and I’ve got a roof over my head.” He remained silent for a moment before latching his hand onto your wrist and pulling you into his chest. “I’d never let anyone do or say anything to hurt you. Remember that. I’m just sorry you had to witness me get like that. I’ll make it up to you though.”

“Oh? I think a date would be a pretty nice way to make it up to me since you insisted on calling me your (Y/n)-chan” you said, giving him a cheeky smile to which he could only reply with a teasing smirk. “Hm, seems only fair after I saved you as heroically as I did.”

“Whatever you say, douche”

*insert baffled Oikawa noises here*

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anistarrose · 2 years

Note

oooh i'd love to hear about anchors and antidotes!! i Love me an alliterative fic title!

well good news, A&A is my longest WIP by a huge margin right now, so I have a lot to say! it's... also kind of where my perfectionism issues have been rearing their ugly heads, so it's the WIP I've had for the longest time, but one day. one of these days.

it's a canon-divergence fic where Taako, somewhere between a few months and a year after Glamour Springs, falls ill with a bad fantasy flu after Candlenights while he's travelling alone. and Taako, for reasons he can't currently recall, has never been good at taking care of himself when he's sick despite his self-perceived "independent" nature — but right when he's at his lowest and can hardly bring himself to get out of bed, much less find someone to help, Barry happens to swing by for a check-in and goes "oh shit bro you look like death, that's no good" and whisks him off to the Evil Necromancy Cave to nurse him back to health, despite Taako having no idea why the hell this lich is helping him.

and for the first few days I was writing, that was all there was to the premise, because I was pretty sick at the time and just wanted to write about one of my blorbos being taken care of — but then it started evolving into working through Taako's emotional issues, and later, even some of Barry's emotional issues? I got thinking about the struggles they might have in common, and the parallels between Taako's guilt over Glamour Springs and Barry's guilt over the Grand Relics, and once I got going on that train of thought I just could not be stopped lmao.

funny enough, I was really unsure about my Taako characterization in later chapters of this fic until Imbalance came along, and just, like? casually validated everything I was writing here about Taako’s mental health, general position on the selfish-vs-selfless spectrum, and the first steps he might take towards healing? that was wild but incredibly welcome, and honestly inspired me to double down on some cool themes I was already toying with because ooh boy do I love a quiet internal struggle over purpose.

but anyways, as a preview, here is a snippet under the cut! (slight unreality content warning, but he's not hallucinating, he just thinks he might be)

When Taako wakes the next time — finally for more than just a few moments — his stomach still aches, but the prospect of drinking something is actually bearable. Appealing, even, given the aftertaste of mucus in his mouth.

He rolls over in his bed, blinking as he registers the sight of jagged stalactites and imposing, oppressive stone walls. The room is dim even to his elven eyes, lit by flickering candles whose warmth he isn’t close enough to feel…

And by the glow of a disembodied red robe, floating a few inches above the rocky floor — who reacts with a jolt, upon seeing Taako’s eyes flit open.

“Oh, shit. You feeling lucid this time, bud?”

“Nope.” His voice is hoarse, but he does get the words out. “I’m hallucinating some weird specter of death.”

“I see.” There’s a hint of amusement in the apparition’s response. “You got enough of an appetite for tea? Or chicken broth?”

“Mmm. I’ll try your haunted tea.” Taako coughs and pulls his blankets back up, closing his eyes again.

He feels improved from last night, or last morning, or whenever the last time he was conscious was — the hallucinating is a little scary, but he doesn’t feel threatened by the stranger behind this ghostly vision. The guy has already nursed Taako back from the brink, apparently — so even though he’s surrounded by some pretty unnerving imagery, borne from Taako’s addled subconscious, he must be kind enough. Not like Taako trusts his subconscious for shit, anyways.

#ty for the ask reese!#taz #taz balance #taz balance spoilers #wip tag #ask meme

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arminbitchlover · 3 years

Text

reincarnated lovers (2)

armin arlert x f! reader

summary: after a terrible first date with armin, sasha convices reader to go out to a party but only to have an unexpected turn of events

word count: 2.8k

content warnings: mentions of drug use, alcohol use, assault is insinuated but doesn't actually happen

"YOU LOOK SOOO GOOD," Sasha squeals as you show her your outfit, making your confidence boost significantly.

"YOU TOO, YOU'RE SO HOT FOR NO REASON!" You both keep showering each other with confidence, not caring if your neighbors could hear you shouting.

You don't understand why you're suddenly filled with anticipation to go to some frat house that would be filled with strangers and smell like alcohol and weed, but you not troubled enough to even question it. All you know is that this is your first party as a freshman, and you want to make the most out of it with your best friend.

"So, who's going that you know anyways?" You glance at Sasha through your mirror as you apply lip gloss.

"Too many to count honestly and not to alarm you or anything but Jean will be there too." Sasha reluctantly spoke as you feel your heart drop to your stomach.

You completely forgot that Jean was a part of Sasha's friend group and now you're going to see him for the very first time since your breakup.

"Y/n?" Sasha waves her hand in front of your face and snaps you out of your deep thoughts.

"Sorry, but thanks for telling me." You shake your head as you try to not lose your train of thought again.

You and Sasha finish up on your final touches and make your way to the party as you feel your stomach flipping and hands slightly shake. Every time you start to tell yourself that Jean was just a friend now, you get flashbacks of everything you did as a couple, but you're going to let some guy ruin your first night out in college.

It doesn't take long to arrive and fuck, it didn't take long for the feelings of regret, nervousness, and panic to sink in. When you first arrive, people were already drunk in the front yard as couples made out the staircase leading to the front door. Immediately when opening the door, the bass from the speakers maakes your whole body vibrate with the music and your eyes strain from all the lights that were being cast across the house.

The whole place is already trashed with cups, plates, and different articles of clothing are scattered across the floor. You've always heard about how wild college parties can be, but you didn't expect something as crazed as this.

You turn to Sasha and see her talking to you but could only read her lips that make out, "I'm... drink," and walk away to the kitchen.

Well, shit.

You awkwardly stand in the middle of the room, not recognizing a single person until you feel a hand clasp your shoulder and pull you to a corner.

"Heya, gorgeousss, name's Flochhh..." A drunk man with auburn hair presses you against the wall as he tries to make conversation with you.

"S-Sorry, but I have to go." You try to get away from him only to have your arm get pulled back to the wall.

"Fucking let me go!" You fight to yank your arm away but don't have enough strength to succeed.

"Buttt I wantss to get chu know you babyyy." He leans in, trying to get your faces closer together, but luckily you dodge him quick enough to get out of his grasp.

"Watchu doinn- runninnn from me." He grasps your hand, but right when you were about to get pinned back against the wall again, you hear a stern voice.

"Get your hands off of her." You and Floch turn and see Armin, but this time with slightly smudged eyeliner with a long black sleeve that's complemented with a necklace and silver rings on both of his hands.

"Huhhh-," Floch slurs, finally letting go of you and confronting Armin.

Armin takes a step back with his hands in his pockets, not wanting to cause any issues, and lightly asserts, "This is my lovely girlfriend, so I would appreciate it if you would just back off, that's all."

Armin walkes up to you and wraps his arm around your waist as Floch's face becomes filled with complete disgust.

"So if you'll excuse us, we'll be getting out of your way so you can get as shitfaced as you like." He smirks at Floch and pulls you away, his hand still clutching your waist.

As he takes you away, you immediately notice how his arm feels so natural around you, like it was meant to be there which causes your heartbeat to quicken.

You only see him as the boy you went on an awkward date with, why did he suddenly make you feel this way?

"Thank you for your help, Armin." You bring your hand to the one that was resting on your waist and squeeze it to show your gratitude.

"I was only doing the bare minimum, no need to thank me." He tenderly looks into your eyes with compassion, not aware that he never let go of your waist.

"Well, what were you doing here anyway, you didn't catch me as the party type." You playfully joke as he grabs your arm and enters a large crowd that's dancing to music.

He turns to face you and tilts his head towards your ear to answer, "I heard you were coming, and I wanted to talk to you."

He grabs you by the waist and starts moving to the beat of the song to follow along with everyone surrounding you.

You feel your face start to heat up, finding it so attractive the way he leaned in to talk to you. He's a completely different person from the guy you went out with. This time he seems so much more confident by the way he holds you, speaks to you, and his fashion did a complete 180.

"Well, what's up?" You gain enough courage to wrap your arms around his neck and move your body with his.

You both move completely in sync forgetting for a second that you weren't the only two people in the room. You feel yourself start to get more butterflies as he maintains eye contact with you and slowly pulls you closer and closer. Before you know it, you have the biggest smile on your face as you have the time of your life with Armin.

This is what you've been missing out on, while you had been locked up in your dorm, exhausting yourself with no sign of ending. While Sasha's the one who made you come out of your comfort zone, Armin's the one who making you enjoy yourself the most and you love the idea of that. You love knowing that there's a person who could actually make you a better person and still make you feel comfortable while being alone with him.

"I don't really know how to explain this, but-"

"Y/N!!" Sasha pushes her way into the crowd and finds you and Armin with your bodies only centimeters apart, but seemingly didn't notice the tension between the two of you.

"Armin, I told you to find her and come to the game room!" She scolds Armin and pulls him away from you, making you feel a bit upset that you're not able to be alone with him a bit longer.

She takes you and Armin to another room that you assume were their friends because as soon as they enter, they're greeted with open arms. You immediately notice a small blonde girl and a tall brunette with freckles sitting together on a love seat and you have to admit that they make such a great couple. Sasha introduces you to everyone in the room and while it was pretty packed, it's easy to memorize who everyone is given that Sasha has mentioned them many times before.

Before you had the chance to settle in with everyone you see Connie get out of his seat and clear his throat very loudly to make an announcement.

"I think that it's only fair, since y/n is the newbie of the group, to play a 2v2 intense game of beer pong between me and Jean." Connie widely grins as everyone agrees and starts rioting.

"I heard my name." Jean abruptly enters, at first not noticing that you're in the same room.

"Well, I don't have a partner to play with so-" You feel a bit of shame while speaking but are quickly interrupted.

"I'll play with y/n," Armin speaks up and everyone gets louder, becoming enraptured as if this is the biggest game in history.

"Let's fucking go then." Jean locks eyes with you for a split second before talking to Connie.

You have to admit, while Jean looks like he's taking good care of himself, you don't feel the butterflies and tension that you thought you would. Maybe you're just overthinking everything because he's your first love, but you figure that maybe something would be left for him. You look back at Jean making sure you don't feel anything, but when you turn to face Armin. Butterflies. Even if it was just a tiny bit, something was there.

For him.

"You guys got this, I mean no offense to the other two, but they're either high, tipsy, or a bit of both." Eren walks up to you two as he chuckles and rubs the back of his neck.

"I've never played this before, so we'll see." You look down, afraid that Eren or Armin would judge you in some way.

"Neither has Armin, he always watches other people play, but I'm pretty surprised he volunteered himself. So, I'm guessing that your first date went pretty well today." Eren playfully nudges Armin as his face turns into a very light pink.

"Um, yeah it was pretty alright," You reply and smile at Armin, even though you both knew that your date was anything but 'alright'.

"Okay, it's set up, you guys can start whenever," Mikasa speaks with a complete monotone voice as she takes a seat back down next to Historia and Ymir.

You and Armin walk to your side of the table as Connie and Jean do the same, while everyone stands around the two teams ready to start their ear-piercing shouts. You start to feel a bit of pressure right before the game started, anxious that you'll make yourself look like a fool if you don't at least make a single cup.

"We'll give Armin the first shot." Connie cockily smirks and bounces the ping pong ball across the table.

Armin grabs the ball with his fingertips and starts calculating the way he would throw the ball. You have to admit, he looked absolutely adorable while concentrating on making it into the cup. You figure that maybe he thinks the same as you, not wanting to embarrass himself, but he looks so relaxed at the same time. After a few more seconds of critical thinking, he carefully throws the ball and makes it perfectly into the middle cup.

Expectedly, everyone starts screaming, jumping up and down, while some people grab Armin and shake him profusely as their excitement shoots through the roof. You can't help but feel thrilled for him as well, and right when his friends get their hands off of Armin, you wrap your arm around his neck and bring him in for a tight hug. You immediately pull away, unsure if he's uncomfortable being hugged by someone he barely knows, but when you take a step back you see his eyes light up with a small smile.

"Cut it out, love birds. It's my shot," Jean shoots Armin a snarky look and chugs the shot. He wasn't concentrating as much as Armin was, probably because he's played this game many times before, and to your surprise, he recklessly tosses the ball and makes a spiral dunk into the cup at the front of the formation.

"GOOD SHIT, JEAN!" Connie aggressively smacks Jean's back, causing him to jump forward and knock down two cups in the back row.

"Are you fucking kidding me, Connie?" Jean hits the back of Connie's head and they both drink whatever liquid was left in the cup and takes them out of the formation.

You look at the cup that has the ball in and right when you're about to take the shot, Armin swiftly takes it out of your grasp and drinks it as if it's water.

At this point, everyone was making fun of Connie's fuck up and cheering on Armin for chugging the shot like nothing while you're panicking in your thoughts, begging yourself not to make a foot out of yourself.

"Here." Armin hands you the ball and you feel your anxiety kick in as everyone's focus goes directly to you.

You feel your fingertips lightly quiver as you begin to aim the ball into the last cup in the back. Predictably, the ball hits the rim of the cup and doesn't make it in, but Armin still whispers to you a few words of encouragement as Marco picks up the ball from the floor and hands it to Connie. The game continues and luckily you and Armin win because of the two cups Jean knocked down, so while you and Armin are a bit tipsy, the others are completely plastered.

"This... nngh - bullshizz..." Connie clumsily walks over to you and hooks his arm around your neck, somewhat pulling you down while speaking to you.

"Alright, enough." Armin pulls Connie's arm away from you and takes you out of the room, before getting the chance to say bye to anyone.

"Armin-" He leads you to an empty room and doesn't hesitate to lock the door behind him.

"Please, let me talk, I've been waiting all night." Armin pulls you to the edge of the bed and slowly sits down as he tries to figure out how to come out with his news. You gently place your hand on top of his and give it a gentle squeeze, reassuring him.

While you did have a feeling about what he'a going to say, you don't want to jinx anything too good to be true. Even though when you first met Armin it wasn't the greatest first impression, spending time with him at the party made you realize that he's so much more than the awkward guy you went out with. You don't understand how your feelings for him switched up so fast in a matter of a day, but you don't care. At this point, Jean's completely out of the picture and something in you is telling yourself that there's something really special about Armin.

“So, um basically I just want to apologize for everything that happened earlier at the café. I-It’s just that you’re the first girl I’ve ever taken out and I didn’t want to fuck up, but I did absolutely everything wrong. It didn’t help how Sasha was talking so highly of you and god, when I saw your pictures, I thought you were the most perfect person I ever laid my eyes on. Then when I saw you, something in me just clicked that you were meant to be mine and I’m not one to believe in that love at first sight bullshit, so I didn’t know what to do. I just nervous and I didn't know what to do. I knew you were and still are way out of my league even though I felt like you were my person, but I didn't want to mess it up, so I tried to be distant to make it go away and I realized how fucking stupid that was. I'm so sorry for wasting your time and I was hoping we could have a second chance at a first date again to make it up to you." He has such a pained but relieved look on his face when he finishes talking, not looking at you, afraid that he may have done something that he would regret.

"I would actually love that, Armin." You exchange smiles and both stare at each other for a second in comfortable silence.

"Well, let's go then."He stands up and brings out his hand to yours.

"Wait what?" You give him a confused look as you place your hand in his and get up from the bed.

"Are you tired or something?" He furrows his eyebrows with a bit of a pouty face.

"No, not at all." You intertwine your fingers with his and make your way out of the frat house, forgetting say goodbye to anyone.

"So, where are you taking me so late at night?" You ask and turn to look at him to see a small smile plaster on his face.

"I was hoping I could take you back to my apartment to make us a proper meal after all that partying." You feel your heart pounding against your chest as he has the most genuine look in his eyes.

"Absolutely."

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#tw: alcohol #tw: drug use #tw: assault #armin smut #armin x reader #armin arlert x reader smut #armin arlert #armin arlert smut #aot armin #snk armin #aot smut

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whenfatecollides · 3 years

Note

Hi ! I've been getting into Dreamcatcher lately since everyone's been saying if you're a lesbian you're gonna like dreamcatcher, and i do ! i was just wondering from someone who obvs knows them better, do you think they're naturally so close to each other or it could be a bit more... fan service stuff bc I'm always worried about getting into groups who just queerbait all the time, idk how to say this and im not trying to attack DC but there's been a lot of talk abt it in kpop lately

I get where you’re coming from, but with time you’ll see that they’re genuinely close

dc have gone through a lot as a group (some of the members have been together for abt 8/9 years now), specially the ex-minx members (jiu, sua, siyeon, yoohyeon, dami) who had to overcome an unsuccessful debut and decide to stick together despite a rough start. there’s a lot in the member’s own story that makes you wonder if there really isn’t a force in the world out there who brought them together because so much happened, to some members more than others, that literally put them right on the path to become a dreamcatcher member. it just had to be the seven of them.

for starters, yoohyeon auditioned for a few companies and mbk accepted her. she went the first day and quit that same day because of how she was treated by the staff. she said that from that experience she wanted to quit on the idea of becoming an idol, but she really loved to dance and sing. which led her to meet sua at a dance competition before they auditioned for hfe. sua had been training to become an idol since 2012 and hfe was the one company who accepted her (I can’t imagine sleeping on that much talent). this led them to debut together and even become roomates.

siyeon had a close songwriter friend who introduced her to the company, she auditioned and got in. similarly, jiu’s vocal teacher referred her to the company, she auditioned and got in as well. as for dami she had wanted to become an idol since elementary school, one day she participated in an open audition at her school and hfe called her for an audition.

with gahyeon, she actually went through a few companies before landing on hfe. she was an fnc traineed for a while, she got in both yg and sm, but left since they weren’t going to debut a group any time soon. similar to dami she participated in an open audition at her school and she got called for an audition.

and handong had some interest in kpop when she was in high school, but when she got the chance to go to korea for university her dad made her promise she wouldn’t try to become an idol, it was literally The condition for her to go to korea, she wasn’t meant to audition according to her parents will. but one of her uni teachers told her about hfe’s audition and she just went for it anyway asdkjhs (her relationship with her parents is fine now). it was just meant to be.

they’ve also mentioned quite a few times that they didn’t just instantly click with each other like that (some members having a cold impression of sua at first, siyeon admitting it took her quite some time to get close with handong, jiu saying she was skeptical about the adittion of handong and gahyeon but soon realised they made the group stronger), they worked on their relationship over time and they wanted to make things work with each other which itself is really important and shows the kind of loving and supportive enviroment they wanted to build for each other (I go a little bit more in depth about their overall story in this post). they’ve made sure to build a really great sense of teamwork with each other since the beginning, from the fact that they had about 2/3 months to prepare for dc’s debut (minx still performed on october 2016 and dc debuted january 2017) alone, they really had to make a conscious choice about it all. honestly one of the things that makes me sure that dc are close is that they don’t hide the negative feelings they sometimes have towards each other (which are normal), they've spoken a few times about silly things that they’ve argued about and have even mentioned that they don’t get the other members involved in the quarrels they’re having with another member to not create more drama than necessary. but you can really see that they love and take of each other in the little things too, not just the (sometimes) fanservice. and by this I mean things like, sua calling handong in the middle of her vlive to go get food for her, dami letting yoohyeon sleep in her bed and going to the living room because she didn’t want to wake her up, siyeon falling asleep on top of yoohyeon and yoohyeon not having the heart to wake her up as well, among many many many things.

but truly they’ve gone through a lot of hardships over the years, including having a member be away and unable to participate in comebacks and group schedules for a whole year (not because of health issues or anything like that, but because of the covid situation that made it impossible for her to fly back to korea), and they got out of that situation being even more appreciative of that member when it could’ve easily been something that could have made them turn on each other. it was a situation that brought them even closer and appreciative of one another. they really want to be on this path together.

as for the queerbaiting bit, I’ve made posts about this before and as I’ve said, it doesn’t matter whether or not it’s fanservice because at the end of the day they’re respectful and caring, and they’re only normalising same sex attraction. they never make you feel gross for that attraction either, they’ve never pulled a ‘no home though’ moment, they continuously sing songs directed at female lovers without changing the pronouns, continuously accept marriage proposals from their female fans, and even when a fan was dubious and said “but we’re two girls” jiu said that it didn’t matter and that love is love, and they’ve said many times that it’s okay for female fans to be nervous around them (aka attracted to them).

and not that it’s anyone’s business but the members themselves have dropped many hints over the years, from not specifying the gender of their ideal type

“Dreamcatcher Handong, “even if they’re not good-looking, a warm-hearted person is my ideal type.” “My idea type, erm... a warm-hearted person. A person not necessarily need to be good-looking, if they’re warm-hearted they’re a good person” ©

Handong: For me, firstly, kind. It would be great if the person has a good personality and is tall.

Gahyeon: For me, because I’m still young I don’t have a definite ideal type. Just someone who smiles prettily and is fun. Ah, if the person has a good voice, it will be good. I like to talk on the phone. ©

Jiu: I wish to have someone I can chat non-stop with, and who is also knowledgable and has a good character. I’ve never really thought about an ideal date, but what’s most important is that the atmosphere has to be comfortable!

Yoohyeon: My ideal type is someone who’s like Peter Pan, someone fun-loving and positive! My ideal date location would be Paris, France. It’s a really romantic city! Really look forward to spending time there with the one I love.

to lowkey admitting a same sex crush (she went to an all girls school as far as we know)

to being uh very straightforward about it

among other things 🐒 I’ve been into kpop for quite a lot of years now and I never experienced a group make this as comfortable as they do honestly. that’s why I say that it doesn’t matter if it is just fanservice, they’re still changing things for the better. but that being said, take your time getting to know them~ I think it’s better that you see it for yourself rather than have someone tell you really

#sorry this turned out super long 💀#i have a lot to say when it comes to dc asdkjsadkjhsd #ask

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sevenmikento · 3 years

Note

Eeee good! I've had this brain rot in my head since I realized I had a crush on Kageyama v.v

But like, a sweet/angst kinda thing where Kageyama might have had a crush on you in high school but he just couldn't process it. So graduation happens, everyone's personal growth into adulthood happens and you stay close as friends. But there's a moment when Kageyama asks if you'd be willing to catch up. Of course you say yes he's your friend. And it's then Kageyama just blurts out that he's always liked you. He feels stupid it took him this long but your the one thing that always felt off when he was traveling an becoming a part of the Schweiden team. Anyways I'm sorry this is wordy and stupid you don't have to do it or anything I just have Kageyama brain rot >.<

Love your stuff,

Jujutsu Curses ❤❤❤❤❤

A/N: *rises from the grave* HELLO!! i finally have the time and energy to write and i shall begin with this banger of a request uwu Kageyama was legit my first haiku love and i wanna kith his forehead thank u

@tobios-housewife

genres: fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, happy ending!!; 2.1k words

a long time [Kageyama Tobio X Reader]

He can’t help but fiddle with the half-empty mug sitting in front of him, his eyes darting over to the front door of the cafe every few seconds as he taps his foot on the ground. The rapid pace of his tapping is rivalled only by the wild thumping of his heart.

Kageyama Tobio glances at the entrance of the establishment once more, catching a stranger staring at him from the corner of his eye. They glare and his foot stops automatically—the awareness that was required of him is something he did not possess in his growing years and even now, as an accomplished adult, the instinct to abide by society’s unwritten social rules still catches him off guard sometimes.

He lifts the mug to his lips and takes a short sip of the piping hot beverage. You’d texted him that you were going to be slightly late and yet he couldn’t help but purchase his usual order first, the anxiety of what he’d set out to do today too much to handle without something—anything—to fiddle with. Of course, he has his volleyball in his gym bag but he knows he’ll only receive odd stares if he resorts to randomly touching it while waiting for you.

The athlete wonders—the racing of his mind akin to that of when he’s in a heated match—if he would be aware of such social nuances had it not been for your presence in his life.

You were—and honestly still are—a force to be reckoned with; someone he never imagined befriending in high school and yet you’d walked right into his life (and his heart), took a seat and never left.

“You’re good at that,” you said, watching from the entrance of Karasuno’s volleyball gym. It was nothing he hadn’t heard before.

As the ball bounced away from the toppled-over plastic bottle on the other side of the net, all he could do was stare at the ground near your feet, speechless. He wasn’t expecting anyone to come in on a Sunday, let alone talk to him out of nowhere.

“You’re supposed to say ‘thanks’, you know?” you told him in a tone that he knew was supposed to be lighthearted.

“Why?” he replied anyways, not sure how he should have responded to your joke.

You laughed and while Kageyama felt that he should have been insulted to some degree, instead, he found himself smiling.

Thinking back, he only now realises it was a smile of relief; you weren’t frustrated or annoyed by his dry and awkward reply, although it would’ve been understandable if you were (especially as the two of you were still teens) but you weren’t and he appreciated it.

He still appreciates it.

“No, dude, it’s 65 because of the ‘x’ here, see? It would be 127 if it had been there instead, though,” you pointed at the parts of the painfully long equation as you spoke, “so it’s not like you don’t know how to calculate it, you were just careless.”

It was 1:30am and his eyelids felt heavy but you were still helping him with his work as if you’d just arrived at his house not a few minutes ago when, in reality, you’d been here for nearly 7 hours. Kageyama’s brain felt fuzzy from exhaustion and yet he found himself hanging onto your every word, absorbing as much information as he could—it was the least he could do.

“Honestly,” you said out of the blue as he reworked the equation, “I think you’ll be getting mostly Bs and some As by graduation.” You smiled like it was solely his own effort; as if it wasn’t you who agreed to tutor him for free, coming by his house and sleeping over when it got too late to go home. You looked at him with your tired eyes and messy hair with such pride that Kageyama himself was nearly deluded into thinking he put in nearly as much effort as you did explaining concepts and breaking down questions in ways he could easily understand.

That night, in that exact moment, his chest swelled with an overwhelming sense of adoration and gratitude and yet all he could do was glance down at the scattered papers on his bedroom floor and mutter a soft, “thank you”.

[11:32AM] (Y/N): i’m a few minutes away! sorry for being late D:

[11:32AM] Tobio: okay :) no worries, i haven’t been here long anyways

It’s easy to lie a little sometimes, though he struggles with it when it comes to you. Kageyama feels—knows—that he owes at least that much to you; to always tell you the truth. So, instead, he twists his own truth so that the words he says or the messages he sends you are never dishonest.

He’s been in this cafe for nearly half an hour. Some might say that’s a long wait, hell, he would say it’s a long wait had it been for anyone else. However, for you, he’d actually arrived twenty minutes early in order to get that one spot you used to love so much when you were still in Karasuno together.

Kageyama has been waiting for thirty minutes but twenty were his own and ten were for you. So, no, he didn’t lie. He hasn’t been waiting long at all.

Ten minutes is nothing compared to the one year he’d spent away from you, after all.

“Are you sure you won’t miss me?” you joked, voice lighthearted as always whenever you weren’t to be taken seriously—he knew that—and yet, when your question prodded at his heart in ways he did not expect, his reaction came out far more aggressive than he’d intended it to be.

“No, why will I? I’m finally achieving my dreams. I don’t need you to be there to hold my hand.”

The moment the words slipped out of his mouth, Kageyama wanted nothing more than to take them back, to swallow them whole and leave them away from you, festering inside his soul. The guilt and shame ran down his spine from the back of his neck, burning hot as the sensation spread across his skin, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

Staring at his half-packed luggage, he didn’t need to look at you to know how hurt you were by his reply. He didn’t have to steal a glance of your face to have known exactly what expression you had on—it was the worst kind. The teary eyes and shaky frown; it was the exact same kind of face that, in the past, had led him to throwing a couple of punches at the people who’d caused you to make it.

If he could have punched himself to make it up to you, he would’ve.

Instead, Kageyama allowed a silence to fall over the room and you, as always, since the very beginning of your friendship, broke it for him.

“I was kidding, y’know?” you laughed and he played along, heart still pounding from the terrifying aspect of losing you. He thought that if he just followed your lead and pretended that things were okay, they would become okay. But even then, he knew that wasn’t going to be the case.

The day after, when he was to leave Miyagi for Tokyo for a year to train with the Schweiden Adlers, you didn’t show up to bid him farewell like you said you would. Instead, you dropped him a text apologising for your absence and wishing him all the best.

Since then, you’ve had regular video calls with him once he’d settled down in the big city with his new team. Kageyama had apologised for his words during your first call—having found it much, much easier to do so when you weren’t physically together, and you happily forgave him. He knows you aren’t, and have never been, the petty kind but part him wishes you hadn’t so easily accepted his apology when it was so long overdue.

“Hi, Tobio!” you greeted, slightly out of breath, as you took the seat opposite him, your sudden presence sending his brain into haywire. He’d spent countless nights imagining how this reunion would feel after a year of not seeing you in the flesh but now as he’s living this moment, he realises none of the numerous scenarios he played in his head can do this feeling justice.

He feels his face start to heat up as his heart pounds loudly within the confines of his chest, the thumping pulse sounding so clear in his head that he genuinely worries you might be able to hear it, too, despite being an arm’s length away. Kageyama feels himself begin to sweat in spite of the cold weather. His eyes dart down to the half-filled mug in his hands as he presses his palms against its curved, cooling surface.

“Oh, wow, are you sure you didn’t wait long?” you laughed lightly, looking at the contents of his cup. He practically feels his blush deepening at the thought of being caught redhanded for his white lie. “So, how’ve you been?”

Kageyama responds accordingly, sharing his experiences with the Schweiden Adlers and adjusting to life in Tokyo. You, in return, talk about a new apartment you’re renting with your cousin and the classes you’re teaching as a part-time substitute in Karasuno while you ponder over what to pursue as a proper career.

Conversation with one another comes surprisingly easy to the both of you. Though neither of you admit it out loud, it feels as though you haven’t been separated for twelve straight months. You chat for hours, sometimes getting a little too loud and worked up, much to the chagrin of the other customers. Slowly but naturally, the topics eventually begin to run out and you opt to sit in silence for a bit, eating your respective lunches as you people-watch.

Kageyama checks his phone and realises he needs to leave soon if he were to make it to the stadium in time to meet his teammates. The Adlers are playing a casual match against a local university team in the evening due to the two coaches being alumni or something along those lines. It’s the only reason why he’s returned to Miyagi for a short bit—

He looks at you as you gaze out the window, a content smile on your face.

—it’s the only reason…

… Right?

“No, why will I? I’m finally achieving my dreams. I don’t need you to be there to hold my hand.”

The words from his past echo in his head, piercing his heart with the same intense guilt and shame from all those months ago when he first uttered those words out of impulse born from his insistence on denying the truth of your relationship.

It’s then you look at him curiously, as if sensing the distress he’s suddenly placed himself in. You part your lips, undoubtedly to ask if he’s okay, but before you can speak, his large, warm hands reach out to engulf your own. Taped fingers and calloused palms grip at your hands firmly, holding onto you as if letting go meant never seeing you again.

“(Y/N), I love you.” he declares, staring straight into your widening eyes. The desire to look away is almost too strong to resist but he pushes himself to maintain the contact, not allowing himself to repeat his past mistakes. “While I was away, I’ve come to realise how much you truly mean to me. You have always been an important person in my life but I’ve never had the courage to tell you. I even hurt you before I left and I still haven’t forgiven myself for that even though you have.

“To be honest, while I’ll always be grateful for it, I do not need you to hold my hand as you’ve done when we were growing up,” he continues, not giving you any chance to get a word in (not that you want to yet, anyway), “but I do want you in my life. I know it’s selfish of me to ask you to be with me as I achieve my dreams but maybe, if we’re together, I can support you in discovering what you would like to pursue as well.”

He takes a deep breath, face tinted red as he tightens his grip on your hands.

“What I’m saying is… will you… do you…” Kageyama’s eyes begin to flicker towards the table and away from your face. But when you pull your hands out of his just to grab them once more and give them a reassuring squeeze, his head freezes in place, eyes staring intently into your own teary ones.

You reply, saying exactly what’s on his mind, word-for-word, “I love you and I’d love to live with you in Tokyo.”

#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#hq #haikyuu x reader #kageyama tobio #kageyama tobio x reader #kageyama x reader #imagines #scenarios #fluff #angst #happy ending #hurt/comfort

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myrandom-fandomlife · 3 years

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Hello! I'm the anon from the 4 part ask that you answered earlier! I saw your post about the different "eras" of DNF and I would like to share some of my opinions since I've been in the fandom since March of last year, so maybe I can write my own analysis and briefly explain what happened during these times (and hopefully someone will find enjoyment in reading this)!

So the first era was probably the most "baity" period where every interaction between Dream and George with slight romantic undertones was pure bait. From Dream placing romantic music in the background, to the small texts on screen that would read "arguing like a married couple" and even proclaiming his love to George any second he could, it was obvious that it was a means to garner a reaction and moments that could be used in compilations, edits, videos, etc. Dream addressed George just the same as he currently does Sapnap or Bad: Dude, Bro, etc, and when they weren't attempting to bait, for example on streams, things were chill, no tension, just two bros hanging out in minecraft.

LOVE OR HOST ERA. The catalyst in DNF's relationship, in my humble opinion. Now, where do I begin? So, LOH was definitely a time that I believe Dream became aware of his feelings towards George (platonic or romantic, I can't be sure) and his fear of losing him. Before/During George's LOH, we got Dream saying some interesting things, the most notable one "George is the only man I can see myself dating". Now, I'm pretty sure this was meant as bait, but how he reacted prior to LOH, was very telling. Dream would avoid George like the plague in every situation that didn't require them to interact. Twitter? Only one mention (and that was literally him tagging George in Andrea's post in spite). Stream? That I can remember he didn't join much during this time, nor did he stream that often. During MCC, the DT was separated in different teams, Sapnap & George together and Dream alone. Now Sapnap DID pop off. He was doing amazing. And Dream complimented him and his team quite a lot. But what about George? I believe he mentioned him ONCE. This was the first time we see Dream jealous in regards to George, and the lack of content and interactions between these two made many believe DNF was dead and abandon the ship all together.

QUACKITY AND KARL. Now there is a lot that happened in between LOH Arc and the friendship between the DT with Karl and Quackity. Dream and George seemed to have solved whatever occured between them, and things were tranquil. We got a few baity moments here and there, but we also started to get the start of the infamous "name-truthing", the soft voices and other subtle moments. Now, during this time George, Dream and Sapnap started developing their friendship with Quackity and Karl, George in particular started getting closer with them and spending LOTS of time with them, so much so that we got more G/K/Q content than we did DT content. And we get Jealous Dream 2.0., only difference from the other occurence of jealously? He addressed it publicly, admitted that he was frustrated and physically affected by the lack of attention from the british man. He confronted George while he was streaming, with an audience of 50k+ viewers. He was desperate.

Things were pretty calm after that, the more intimate and subtle moments between the two became more and more apparent and began to outweight the baity moments. Quackity/George/Karl continued to blossom their friendship, and DNF was slowly becoming a topic to tease George and Dream (I can only compare their teasing to that of middle schoolers when their friends had a crush). We can compare this teasing to that of Skephalo, the difference, while one is leaning on the more explicit side and used to make others laugh or get an over the top reaction, the other was used as an inside joke of sorts, only brought up to embarass or shut up Dream/George when they got over-confident (most times it would effectively leave them quiet, important to note, is that they never denied the claims nor attempted to).

TRAINS PODCAST. Oh boy, was this a night to remember. A historical mark for DNF. The point in history that George decided to become BOLD and actively flirt with Dream whenever he wanted to, rendering or poor Leo speechless most of the time. That podcast changed these men, it unlocked something within them and things have never been the same since. This is where we see the dynamic take a major switch, and baity moments had become almost non-existent, and instead we got probably some of the most tension filled convos between these himbos. Name-truthing had become something natural between them, the unavoidable excitement whenever they hear one another in call, suddenly ever call became a matter of how long until they were third-wheeling everyone. It's also during this time that we clearly see a difference in between Dream & Sapnap's relationship and Dream & George's relationship (not that one outweighed the other, but the nature of these relationships were very much opposing)

And finally we are in our current stance. Where the sweet, obnoxious moments continue to pile; More and more of their friends are calling them out (you can literally see Quackity and Karl becoming more direct and, quite honestly, aggressive with their call-outs. I bet they are just as tired as we are); The whole hoodie fiasco and the secretive pictures; Syncing sleep schedules once again; Tension continue to grow and you can see them testing the waters, in a game of tug of war until one of them caves in and starts the conversation.

As I said before, they have nothing to gain from the bait they are currently doing. They excuse it as being a joke, and hide behind this lie, as a means to test the development and seriousness of whatever they have going on. The whole Valentine's thing proves that they (unfortunately) do not understand when the other is being sincere or baity...

Also here is some food for thought. George has been very clingy with Dream ever since he and Sapnap moved in together. Not being able to see each other is certainly another factor that is affecting them.

I'm anxious to figure out what in the hell is happening next between our oblivious idiots with communication issues. It sometimes seems surreal the things that occur between them, and straight out of a fanfic.

Anyway, sorry for the long rant and if this wasn't very interesting to read! Just wanted to get some thoughts out of my head!! Stay safe and hope you have a good day/afternoon/night! ❤

Hi love! Glad to have you back <3

Firstly, don’t ever be sorry for ranting in my inbox, especially ab dnf. I love to see it!

Thank you for this, especially the early parts when I wasn’t in the fandom yet. Ahh this is super helpful.

I agree that George has gotten more clingy since Sapnap and Dream moved in together which is so funny because Dream and George have a more similar sleep schedule than Sapnap and Dream do LMAO

But yes all of this ugh I’m deeming you my genius anon

#dreamnotfound #dnf #genius anon #ask

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