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#i'm writing something on that but i really doubt i will finish it. i never finish anything
magnus-rar · 3 months
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trans jonah magnus is so real to Me... a lot of his traits could be partially ascribed to his experience as a 19th century trans person
it would create a separation between him and his body, make him a guest in his own flesh, form a "my body is not my own" sentiment that would last for 200+ years (even if for different reasons). it would force him to create himself, and to fight for recognition. it would form the "it's not in your blood, or your soul, or your destiny" belief (he wouldn't believe in biological determinism at least, which is a solid argument, i think). it would make him afraid of being outed, and thus afraid of being truly known, and yet make him long for someone who would understand
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kykyonthemoon · 3 months
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Moonlit
You're on the mission to approach a target at a banquet, and that's all it takes to drive him crazy.
🌻 Rafayel/Xavier/Zayne x F!Reader Tags: R16+, suggestive theme, MDNI, possessive, marking and biting, no established relationship This is a request by Xuanlinhh. A/N: This is my first time trying out something like this for L&D, as I don't usually write fic with suggestive theme. So I'm curious to know how I've done with this fic. Feedbacks are always appreciated. After so many titles, I decided to choose "Moonlit", since the moon represents illusion, fear, hidden things. These are the scenarios where he shows another color of his to you. Thus, in all three scenes, there are moonlight all over the place.
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𝑹𝒂𝒇𝒂𝒚𝒆𝒍
Your eyes widened when you saw the dress draped over your cotton blanket. It was long past the ankles, the shoulders were slightly bulging and hanging down to reveal the collarbone. The dress consisted of many layers of pastel pink and purple. In the afternoon sunlight, the sequins and pearls attached to it seemed to shine.
“Does he really want me to wear this?” It was a murmur to yourself. The dress was too exquisite, too expensive, too... much at least in comparison to what you would often put in your wardrobe. You did not need to become a princess, just a normal evening dress to blend in and complete the task assigned to you.
Being ignorant about high society or lavish balls, you had asked Rafayel for help. You never expected him to send you such a gorgeous dress.
Indeed, as he predicted, you became the focus of the party as soon as you arrived there.
Each party guest had a mask. Yours arrived in the same color scheme as the dress and was encrusted with opulent pearls and jewels. You wondered why Rafayel was making you look quite distinct. However, you shouldn't have had any reason to doubt him at all when your target moved toward you on his own initiative.
The target of this mission was a high-class profile from another city. Even though you tried your best to focus on the mission, you still wondered if Rafayel came here, or just his work.
The banquet area was adorned with paintings by Rafayel, so it was hard to look at them and not think about him. Had he made it in yet? Would he abandon you here, trapped in a conversation with a stranger?
Using the skill of pretended intimacy in order to obtain information was something you had learned from your training courses. You put a hand on the target's, smiling and talking as if you were fascinated by him. After getting the information you needed, you made an excuse to leave, but it did not appear like things would finish so simply.
He grabbed your wrist and roughly pulled you back to your seat. You shouted, but the music and laughter drowned you out. You aimed at the middle of his face and was about to throw a punch, only to have an arm wrapped over your shoulder and holding your back.
“It seems like this lady doesn't want to be here anymore.”
You knew right away that voice, and that scent were as familiar as a field of wild roses. You turned around and saw Rafayel standing next to you. His hand held your shoulder to help you stand up. Suddenly your heart was filled with joy to see him.
Your target still refused to let go, but when he realized Rafayel's face was not covered by the mask, he knew that was someone he could not meddle with.
He said something to Rafayel in a foreign language and then walked away. You looked at Rafayel, grateful:
“Rafayel…”
Before you finished speaking, you were tugged out of the banquet room by him.
The quiet garden was awakened by the footsteps of two people. From behind, you couldn't see Rafayel's face, only his broad shoulders covered in a dark-colored tuxedo with sequins. You had the strange impression that he was furious. Perhaps it was his pressure that caused your wrist to get crimson. He guided you through a labyrinth of plants and stone sculptures.
“Rafayel.”
He only stopped when you called his name, but still did not turn to look at you. You stepped forward to observe him. You took a step forward to study him. A frown could be seen plainly on his forehead as his face pouted.
“Rafayel? What's the matter?"
His gaze grew gloomy. His hand holding yours tightened even more as he pulled it up to touch his cheek.
“…”
His abrupt movement confused you. He buried his face in your palm, took in a deep breath and gave you a bite.
“Rafayel!”
You let out a cry of surprise instead of agony since the bite was rather faint. He took advantage of your vulnerability to wrap his arms around you, forcing your body to touch his.
His lips placed on your palm a kiss where it had just been bitten, then slid down to your wrist. You made an unsuccessful attempt to flee. He gave you another glance, or rather studied every strand of lace and fabric of the garment that embraced your upper body.
“I made a terrible mistake sending this dress to you. Too graceful. Too desirable…”
The moon, round like a silver disk overhead, provided the sole light in the labyrinth. Rafayel continued to rub his face on your hand, his face appearing and disappearing in an instant.
“He touched you here…” Rafayel whispered. He kissed your wrist and palm again, fiercely like a storm.
“You… What are you doing?…”
Your heart beat was so incessant. It might have been an overdose of alcohol that caused your arms and legs to feel so weak. Rafayel let go of your hand, just to rub his head on your shoulder. His fingers sank into your hair, causing your mask to fall off. You caught his heavy breathing close to your ear, his breath caressing your uncovered neck and collarbone.
“What about here?”
Rafayel asked, then he bit your neck, causing your body to squirm in agony.
“N-No! Rafayel!”
You tried to push him away, but the more you resisted, the more Rafayel tightened his hold on you. His lips sucked into your ear.
"Here?"
“I… I was just talking to him… That's all!”
"Good." He said, leaving your neck covered in crimson kiss marks. Moist. Burning. Exposed under the moonlight. "You won't be touched by that filthy hand ever again. Not in the slightest... I promise it."
A crazy thought suddenly crossed your mind. You had never seen this side of Rafayel. It frightened you, and also invited you to explore further.
“What... are you going to do?…” You asked in a daze. With your head whirling, you sought to Rafayel's powerful arms for support.
“With him? You shouldn't be worried about that guy. What you should be worried about is the things that will happen to you right now.”
“Rafayel, you—!”
He nipped you on the neck, then planted another kiss where he could hear your nearly deranged heartbeat—deeper beneath your collarbone.
You took deep breaths. Rafayel straightened up and gazed down at you, euphoric in his arms. The bite marks and kiss marks were intertwined like a work of art he had left on you. Similar to the garment you were donning, they served as a reminder to others that you belonged to no one, but him.
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𝑿𝒂𝒗𝒊𝒆𝒓
The melodious music led the couples back and forth according to a set pattern. Every step, every movement was perfectly planned. Only eyes were not so easily controlled.
Yes, you had been looking at that man in the white attire ever since the music started and you were escorted to the center. His hair as bright as starlight at night stood out in the ballroom. And no matter where he was, you would find him in a blink. Even with the silver mask covering half of his face.
And, he also looked at you. There was a hint of sorrow and a tinge of rage in his eyes. Did you delude yourself like that? Or was he really looking at you and wishing that the person each of you were guiding through music was the other?
Carelessly, your heel stepped on your partner's foot. You said in embarrassment:
“My apologies… How clumsy I am.”
The man said there was no problem, and you continued dancing. This was the target you must approach for the day's mission. You turned back to face Xavier. He was also leading another person in the dance. Another target.
Due to the importance of this mission, neither you nor Xavier must show any negligence. But in the midst of this lavish masquerade, what you wanted the most was to leap into Xavier's arms. You could dance until dawn, if it was with him.
You forced the stray ideas out of your mind. You needed to focus. Extremely. You turned back to your dance partner, who did not seem to notice anything unusual. You pulled him closer and your hand on his shoulder slid down slightly.
A grin came across his grim mask to greet you. You caught a glimpse of the other side, Xavier's face tightening. Almost at once, his dance partner intentionally fell into his arms.
Fortunately, you had a mask on as well. Otherwise, your unpleasant glance would be visible to everyone in this room, including him.
You leaned your head slightly on your partner's shoulder. But you still kept an eye on Xavier. He was also observing your every move. Every time the other girl became close to Xavier, you did the same thing to your dance partner. This was supposed to be a mission, but it ended up being such a ridiculous competition.
One more dance and you got what you needed from the target. You made up an excuse and sneaked out onto the balcony alone. The starry sky loomed above you, and the aroma of flowers and grass bathed in night dew calmed you down. You removed your mask and set it on the railing. At that moment, a powerful hand was wrapped around your waist and gently squeezed.
You were startled. But immediately, you realized that the hand belonged to Xavier. He was approaching you from behind. He approached you from behind. His breath, which carried the delicate aroma of wine and cinnamon, breathed into your hair, before gradually sliding down the back of your neck, sending you slight trembles.
“Xavier?…What are you doing?…”
The mask he was still wearing tapped against your bare back exposed to the moonlight, causing you to shiver. Gently, Xavier laid kisses on it.
“Xavier!…” Your body was slightly bent, but his hand on your abdomen held you up. His other hand was around your neck, stabilizing you in that posture. A series of hasty kisses covered your back and shoulders. You bit your lip, waiting for him to speak while silently relishing the heated sensation radiating from the places where his lips met.
A little later, the hand holding you eased somewhat. You took that opportunity to turn around to face Xavier.
You could tell, even through the mask, he was hurt. He did not say a word, just looked at you like a puppy abandoned in the rain. You let out a soft sigh, wrapped your arms over his head to remove the mask. You pressed your palm against his cheek.
“Why did you do what you just did…” Your cheeks flushed, and you were certain that your back was now coated with traces of his. Xavier drew you back into his arms, grasping your hips once more.
“This mission…” He paused for a moment. “It's really too much for me.”
“Don't you like it, dancing intimately with such a beautiful girl?”
The scene of him holding someone else in his arms was enough to upset you. But it went both ways to Xavier, who was not able to hold his feelings any longer. To your surprise, he lifted you up and placed you on the railing. You felt guilty for unintentionally triggering Xavier's fury.
"I don't enjoy it one bit." Xavier replied bluntly. “Because, there is only one girl I have my eyes on in this universe and she is right in front of me.” His chilly fingers moved from your hip to your shoulder, then your neck. “I don't want anyone else to touch her.”
Before you could say anything, Xavier clasped your lips in a passionate kiss, sending your head spinning.
“No one else… but me…” Xavier whispered in very short pauses, then buried himself again in your embrace and scorching kisses.
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𝒁𝒂𝒚𝒏𝒆
The high society banquet in Linkon City was truly a remarkable event. You also prepared meticulously for that day, as your latest mission needed you to meet a target at that party.
You had done quite well during the first two hours of the event. You looked graceful in a luxurious, tight-fitting black velvet dress, with long sleeves and a thigh-high slit. You spoke, laughed, drank, and danced with your target, and everything went perfectly until you noticed a familiar figure standing in the corner of the room, observing.
The guests were all wearing masks, and from such a distance, you wondered whether you were wrong. He would dislike such events. But you couldn't shake the feeling that you were being watched, attentively, by someone you knew well.
After completing the mission, you sneaked out through the path least noticed. Your feet hurt from dancing too much in high heels. So you pulled them off and wandered barefoot across the calm garden at night. The dew-soaked grass made your feet chilly, but it also provided a soothing and delightful feeling.
You sat and settled by the fountain. You removed your mask and threw it on the grass next to the shoes. Your feet had begun to swell. You stretched them out, placed your hands on the fountain, and elevated your face, allowing the silver moonlight to beam down on you as you felt relaxed and relieved after finishing your work for the day.
The sound of shoes treading on the grass jolted you awake. When you opened your eyes, you saw a figure standing between you and the moonlight, clothed in a flawlessly fitting black tuxedo. That was who you had suspected all along.
“Zayne?”
You called his name, and he took off his mask.
“It's really you!” You exclaimed, happy and astonished. "I didn't think you would attend events like this."
Zayne's face hardened, indicating seriousness. He examined you thoroughly, from your somewhat unkempt hair to the garment that clung to your body, displaying your curves and the bare thigh beneath it. He gently leaned down, one knee resting on the grass. His chilly palm touched your ankle, startling you.
“Z-Zayne!”
He gave you a glance, implying that you should remain still. His large thumb brushed over the irritated skin on your leg. Cool and comfy, as if being iced. You knew it was Zayne using his Evol.
“Seeing me here, are you surprised?”
You nodded; all words had vanished once Zayne touched you.
“I was invited. If I hadn't come, I probably wouldn't have caught you doing—"
He left the sentence incomplete without glancing at you.
"Caught me doing what?"
"…Nothing."
He tilted down and focused on rubbing your feet with all the gentleness that made you feel both comfortable and tickled.
“I think… my foot is fine now.”
Despite the fact that Zayne's Evol should have kept you cold, your body began to heat up. You were about to alter your posture to sit up straight, but he grabbed your ankle.It appeared so little in his massive, covered in scars hands.
"Be still." He whispered quietly. "Where do you want to go with feet like this?"
"I… have to go back to HQs to report for today's mission…" You made up an excuse. As soon as you left the banquet room, you sent all of the information to the headquarters.
"Mission? Is that the reason why you were intimate with that guy?”
Zayne gazed into your eyes. His face did not exhibit much expression, but his eyes were perplexing. Could it be that he was uncomfortable when he noticed you being close to someone else at the party?
Having hit the nail on the head, you pushed forward. You slipped your bare foot forward until it reached his chest.
"Maybe. But that man was really interesting. He's a doctor, too. Strangely, I was more interested in speaking with him than with some other doctors I knew."
Zayne's expression worsened. His hand shifted from your ankle to your foot, gripping firmly.
"Don't mess with me."
A giggle escaped your so red lips. “Or else? What would Dr. Zayne do to me?”
Zayne frowned. He gazed at your foot, which was still on his body. He softly stroked it and said:
"You're drunk."
"It seems so." You laughed again. Your toes started moving purposely against Zayne's chest. He grabbed them and to your surprise, he placed a kiss on the middle of your feet.
“Zayne!?”
You were so bewildered that you almost fell into the fountain. Zayne grabbed your leg and swiftly positioned his other hand behind you to support your back. Suddenly being so close to each other sent you a panic attack. You sensed a fresh scent like snow and wood emanating from his body. The sound of your heart beating was so loud that he could hear it clearly without a stethoscope.
He glanced at you for a minute before carefully returning to his former posture. His hand left your body, leaving you a little dissatisfied. As if reading you, he leaned forward again. One hand clutched the base of the fountain, exactly near to your hip, and almost immediately, you heard the sound of the water freezing, followed by silence. His other hand kept your leg tight to his torso. Long fingers caressed your calf and thigh. You trembled at the cold he delivered, but it was promptly followed by a tingling sensation throughout your body.
"Do you really like talking to him more than me?"
Zayne asked quietly. The hand that was sliding down your thigh came to a halt at the end of the dress's slit and then tightened, prompting you to cry out unintentionally.
Seeing your helpless reaction and crimson cheeks, a satisfied smile appeared from the corner of Zayne's mouth.
“I guess what you mean to say is, no.”
"You…"
You could feel Zayne's heat wrapping around your legs, in the place where your skin was exposed to the moonlight, then running all over your body. You sat still so he could continue to draw close, his lips gently brushing the corner of your lips provocatively.
“Now you will have to bear the consequences for teasing me.”
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catmiemy · 2 months
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Things Will Never Be the Same (Lia Wälti x Reader)
Summary: You figure out that your girlfriend hasn’t been paranoid and your best friend is actually in love with you.
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A/N: Finally managed to finish something! I have so many ideas, but I'm constantly too busy to actually write them. But I'm hopeful to have more time the next few weeks.
Also I'm definitely going to write a part two for this because I need a happy ending. So if there's anything you want to see, please tell me. :)
“Where the hell is my coffee?”
Your girlfriend’s voice reached you through the bathroom door. Both the actual words and her tone made you frown at yourself in the mirror. Apparently someone had woken up on the wrong side of the bed again. Like most mornings these days.
With a sigh you went back to applying your make up. There was no point in arguing with Jessica when she was like this. Furthermore you had a long day ahead of you and didn’t feel like wasting your energy unnecessarily. It probably, no definitely, wasn’t a good sign that you reached a point where you thought of most interactions with your girlfriend as draining, but you weren’t ready to face that fact.
Unfortunately Jessica was determined to bring the argument to you. Only a few moments after her initial shout, the door crashed open and your girlfriend marched into the room. “Where the hell is my coffee?”
Annoyance flared up inside of you. You did your best to keep a grip on your anger though, this would turn ugly if you also lost your temper, well uglier than it was going to be anyway. You hated what had become of your relationship, but no matter how hard you tried, you continuously failed at turning things around. You used to be so happy, so in love.
“Oh, I didn’t realize you were awake, otherwise I would have brought you your cup.” You tried your hardest to keep a neutral tone and an impartial expression, all the anger and pain you felt hidden behind this façade.
Bringing Jessica a cup of coffee in bed had been one of your favorite things early on in your relationship. Her eyes always lit up with sheer joy and an endless amount of love for you at this small gesture. Back then she never got tired of telling you how much it meant to her, how much she enjoyed these few minutes in bed with her favorite beverage and cuddles with you, because of course in the early days of your relationship you would always snuggle back into bed with her. Now it had become chore, which apparently you got yelled at for if you missed it once.
“I sent you a text to let you know!” Jessica pointed out sharply.
You grabbed your phone and sure enough, there was a message from her. You also noticed that you had forgotten to turn off the “Do not disturb”, but you doubted that Jessica would be receptive to this explanation. Another thing that you noticed was a message from your best friend, your teammate at both Arsenal and the national team, Lia.
I’m grabbing us some coffee.
See you at the airport!
These few words were enough to bring a smile to your face, another thing that didn’t sit right with Jessica. She snagged the phone out of your hand.
“Hey!” You protested, grabbing the phone back from her. It wasn’t hard, Jessica relented it easily once she had seen what had made you smile.
“When will you finally realize that she has a crush on you?” She basically spat at you.
 This was an old argument and one that always made your blood boil. Lia was off limits! However you didn’t have the time, or energy, for a full blown fight right now. So you restricted yourself to hissing at your girlfriend that she should really leave Lia out of this and that you would talk later. Then you pushed past her, grabbed your luggage that you had put next to the door, and left the apartment.
Unsurprisingly your uber wasn’t here yet. A quick glance at your watch revealed to you that you were a good ten minutes early. The thought of going back into your apartment and facing your girlfriend again was entirely unappealing, so you decided to stay out here. At least the weather was pleasant enough.
To avoid being seen by Jessica, which might have prompted her to come out and continue your argument, you moved a little further down the street until you were hidden behind some bushes. Standing there you were hit by the realization that this might be a new all time low for your relationship. And if you were being honest the idea that this was what the rest of your life was going to look like made you sick to your stomach. Better not to dwell on it.
The instance you entered the airport and spotted your best friend, you rushed over to her and flung your arms around her. Lia matched your motion, although a little awkwardly since she was holding two coffees.
“Hey Schätzi, is everything okay?” She asked you, worry dripping from her voice.
You nodded your head and allowed yourself to enjoy the closeness a little while longer, before extracting yourself.
“Fight with Jessica,” you mumbled.
Anger set Lia’s eyes ablaze. She bit her lips to avoid saying anything too harsh. It was no secret that the dislike between your best friend and your girlfriend was mutual. However Lia was much better at keeping civil than Jessica.
“I’m sorry. Do you want to talk about it?”
This time you shook your head, “Nah, I don’t want to think about it right now.”
As was normally the case it didn’t take long before you told Lia everything nonetheless. When it came to her you never could keep silent, no matter how closed off you were with everyone else. Lia’s soothing and caring personality made you feel like it was okay to get it all out. And even if you would never admit it, you usually felt better afterwards.
Lia was a very attentive listener. Her gaze rested on you the entire time and she nodded along, keeping a mostly neutral complexion. If you would have focused on it, you could have easily picked up on the disdain for your girlfriend in your friend’s eyes, but you didn’t want to see it.
And anyway, the more you talked about it, the more explanations you found for Jessica’s behavior. She wasn’t a morning person, she always felt a bit lonely when you had to travel because of work, anger was her go to emotion when she was overwhelmed.
“You know I think I’m going to text her that I’m sorry and that we should talk in the evening,” you announced.
Lia looked at you skeptically, asking carefully, “Why are you apologizing?”
You shrugged your shoulders, finding it more difficult than expected to answer her question. Somehow you always felt like you had to apologize around Jessica. Again, this was something you didn’t want to dwell on.
“For yelling,” you said finally, before quickly changing the subject.
The arrival at camp and especially the reunion with all your teammates that you hadn’t seen in a long time was chaotic and easy to get lost in. Still you noticed that Lia was quieter and more reserve than usual and you promised yourself to question her about it before bed. With a pang of guilt you realized that you hadn’t even asked her how she was this morning at the airport, just instantly unloading all of your stuff onto her.
Dinner dredged on for quite some time and when it was finally finished you realized that both Lia and Ana were nowhere to be seen. First you checked the room Lia and you shared, when they weren’t there you headed to Ana’s room.
You stopped in your tracks when you heard sobbing coming from the room. It didn’t sound like someone having a little cry either, no this was desperate wailing and even before you knew who was in so much turmoil, your heart broke for the unknown person. That being said, the moment you realized who was sobbing their eyes out your heart shattered into a million pieces.
“I can’t do it anymore,” a voice that you recognized instantly as the one of your best friend in the whole world, managed to get out between sobs.
As if these words were pulling you into the room, your body began moving on its own accord. You burst into the room, frantically looking around for Lia, rushing to her side the moment you spotted her on the bed. She was wrapped in Ana’s arms, but this didn’t deter you. You simply threw your arms around both of them.
“What’s happening, Schätzi? Please tell me, what’s going on. If someone hurt you, I swear to god I will kill them!” You would! No one was allowed to hurt your best friend, not when she was the sweetest person on the planet.
To your immense surprise Lia went rigid the moment she heard your voice and felt your arms around her. This didn’t make any sense; you had always been each other’s place of comfort. You looked up at Ana questioningly, startling once again when you saw the anguish in her eyes. What had you missed? Had someone died? One of Lia’s parents?
While you were still trying to make sense of this all, Lia freed herself from both yours and Ana’s arms and with a mumbled apology ran out of the room. You jumped up as well, ready to go after her and get to the bottom of this, but Ana held you back.
“Don’t,” she told you earnestly.
“I…Ana, what the hell was that? Please, you need to tell me, so I can be there for Lia. I’m her best friend, I need…” You didn’t know exactly what you needed; just whatever would help you take away Lia’s pain. You had never seen her like this, not even after any of her breakups.
Ana chewed on her lip, the internal struggle happening in her mind clear as day. In the end she sighed and said, “I can’t, Y/N. I want to because I think it’s important that you know, but it’s not my story to tell. Give Lia a little time to calm down and then try talking with her again, yeah?”
You nodded, even if in reality you had already decided not to heed Ana’s advice. How could you not try finding Lia right this second when she was this devastated? More than anything you wanted to make it better for her and you had a lot of faith that you could. You had always been there for Lia, through everything, just like she had been for you.
Therefore you began searching for Lia everywhere. First you checked your hotel room, but unsurprisingly she wasn’t there. Then you went outside because Lia loved being outdoors when she felt emotional. Again, no luck. The next hour you spent looking through every nook, but Lia was nowhere to be found.
Defeated you went back to your hotel room, hoping she had returned there by now. You held your breath when you entered, disappointment hitting you when you were greeted by a dark and empty room.
You plopped down onto the bed, not even bothering to turn on the light despite it slowly getting dark. Where was Lia? And more importantly what had happened to her? You picked up your phone, debating if you should call someone from Lia’s family. Maybe they had some information.
That’s when your phone lit up with a call from Jessica, an unwelcome remainder that you were supposed to talk everything out with her tonight. However, you didn’t have the energy for that right now; especially not when it would mean you would have to grovel until Jessica finally deemed it enough to forgive you. Lia’s words popped up in your mind, why were you even apologizing?
So you ended up ignoring the call, and you also ignored that this would inevitably lead to an even more difficult conversation with even more groveling on your part. Right now you couldn’t worry about that, all of your concerns were taken up by the whole situation with Lia.
You had lost all sense of time, so you couldn’t say how much later it was when the door was finally opened and Lia tiptoed into the room. Instantly you sat up, startling your friend who had expected, hoped really, that you were already asleep.
By now it had become pitch black in the room, and you reached towards the light switch to turn on the lights. When Lia saw your movement, she asked you not to, her voice sounding horribly hoarse. You respected her wishes, instead getting up and walking over to her in an attempt to give her a hug.
“Don’t,” Lia pleaded, cracking your heart in the process
What was going on? What had you done to make her push you away? It physically pained you not to offer Lia any comfort when she was clearly struggling, but again you listened to her boundaries.
“Lia, please talk to me,” you begged, “Ana told me…”
Later you would try to rationalize what you did next, or didn’t do to be more precise, to yourself by saying you were too stunned to stop Lia once it became apparent that she thought you were going to say that Ana had told you what was bothering her, when really you wanted to say, ‘Ana told me to leave you alone for a while, but I can’t do that.’
However a small voice would always point out that you could have stopped her at any time if you had really wanted to. The thing was though, you wanted to know what was going on with Lia, so you didn’t stop her.
“I…look…I’m so sorry! And I promise I can keep my feelings in check. I’ve been doing it for the longest time, so please…I can’t lose you! I know you’ll never love me like I love you, but I still need you in my life. Please….I’m…”
Lia’s voice broke, sobs bubbling up instead. She suppressed them successfully, but there was nothing the midfielder could do against the quiet tears streaming down her cheeks.
By now you really were shocked into silence, your mind reeling. Was it possible that Jessica had been right all this time and Lia did in fact have a crush on you? No, that was crazy! Your best friend had never given any indication that she liked you like this. Or had she?
You looked up at Lia whose whole posture screamed defeat. Her head was bent, her gaze firmly trained on the floor. The brunette had crossed her arms in front of her as if to protect herself from whatever you were going to say.
“Wait what? You have a crush on me?” This was the rather dumb response you came up with.
Lia shrugged her shoulders helplessly, her voice tear-stricken when she spoke again, “I’m not sure if that word is strong enough for what I feel, but like I said, it doesn’t matter. I can deal with it.”
She looked up at you for a moment, but was unable to even meet your eyes. Panic hit you, no matter how much Lia stressed that this wouldn’t change anything, you weren’t too sure if this was true now that it was all out in the open. You couldn’t lose her!
“But wait? Didn’t Ana already tell you this?”
Lia’s question ripped you from your downward spiral and at least for a moment the fear was drowned out by intense shame.
“No, she didn’t. I was going to say she told me to leave you alone, but then you began explaining and I just didn’t stop you because I wanted to know what’s going on so I could help,” you admitted.
Now it all made sense why Lia hadn’t wanted to talk to you about what was bothering her. You wished that you could turn back time and make different choices, so you never found out about this. But you didn’t deserve that, not after basically tricking Lia into disclosing her secret.
“What?” Lia asked in anguish, “So I could’ve...You never had to…I’m so stupid!”
And with that your best friend turned around and fled from the room. The sobs she could no longer hold back shaking her shoulders, and breaking your heart. You deserved all the fear and shame and other complicated feelings that came with this being laid open, but Lia didn’t.
You sank back down onto your bed, staring numbly at the wall, while your mind was beating yourself up mercilessly. If only you hadn’t been so selfish! How did you never notice that the most important person in your entire life was in love with you? What did that say about you?!
There were no tears, just silence and an ever growing pit in your stomach.
When the room to the hotel room was opened again sometime later, a tiny flutter of hope went through you. Maybe you could find the right words and things could go back to how they had been straight away?
This small and probably completely unrealistic hope was crushed instantly when you saw that it wasn’t Lia but Ana entering the room. She rushed over to you, engulfing you in a hug.
“Hey, how are you?”
You didn’t answer Ana’s question, but allowed yourself a moment of burying yourself in your friend’s arms. And anyway it was impossible to reply when you didn’t even know how you were, if you were really still in that hotel room, if this was in fact your life.
After a short while you pulled back, sitting up straight and focusing on the truly important topic.
“How’s Lia?” You asked, fear tinting your words.
Ana took a few seconds to answer, pondering her words. The truth wasn’t pretty, so she wanted to do her best to soften the blow.
“Not too good,” she admitted finally. “There’s just too many emotions hitting her at once. I think up until now she still had some hope that you’d return her feelings. But now that it’s all out in the open these hopes have been crushed and she just needs some time.”
While talking Ana studied you carefully. She had always wondered if maybe you returned Lia’s feelings. Not that she had ever told her friend that, the poor girl didn’t need any more confusing thoughts and emotions to deal with. Part of her wanted to ask you straightforward, but in the end Ana decided against it. Now was not the time for it, not when it was clear that you too were completely overwhelmed with everything that had happened.  
For you the thought of Lia needing time, time apart from you, made you nauseous. There was barely a day where you didn’t see or at least talk to your best friend. A reality where that wasn’t true, even if it was only for a little while, felt unbearable. However you were well aware that you weren’t in a position to make any demands. If Lia needed time, you had to accept that.
“Nadine has agreed to switch rooms with Lia so that she can stay with me. Are you okay with that?”
Ana’s soft words pulled you from your thoughts. The idea of Lia not sleeping in the bed next to you felt like another punch to the stomach. Still you pushed down your emotions and the tears burning in your eyes, and nodded.
“Okay then,” Ana said, a little unsure on how to proceed. If only she could cut herself in half and offer both Lia and you some comfort!
You decided to make it easier for her by standing up and heading to the bathroom. There you gathered Lia’s vanity bag, handing it to Ana when you returned. After that you quickly assembled all the things your best friend would need for the night. Pain shooting through you with every familiar item you picked up.
“Goodnight, Ana,” you said once you had given her everything, before disappearing into the bathroom once again to get ready for bed yourself.
You did so in record time, wanting to be in bed and be able to pretend you were already sleeping when Nadine came to the room.
At least this worked out in your favor and when you heard the door being opened again, you pressed your eyes shut and didn’t react to your teammate’s soft calls. You probably weren’t very convincing, but thankfully Nadine decided to leave you alone.
Sleep evaded you for a long time. You lay there with closed eyes, silent tears rolling down your cheeks as you tried and failed to keep your mind occupied. But no matter what you did, it kept circling back to the horrible image of Lia’s devastation once she understood that she had just revealed her biggest secret to you, the gut-wrenching realization that everything would be different now, and the fear of losing Lia once and for all.
What if she would never be able to move past this? She had so many great friends in her life, Ana, Leah, Viv and so many more, what if she realized that they were much better than you anyway? You couldn’t imagine a life without Lia. The prospect of a few weeks without her was already enough to make you want to curl up in bed and never get up again. But if you never got her back? You couldn’t do that. You couldn’t.
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luvhughes43 · 8 months
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the beginning | jack hughes
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au masterlist⭐️
summary: jack and yns relationship is super lowkey, but what happens when yn starts doubting why their relationship is so private?
warnings: pregnancy
word count: 5.6k
The first time you met Jack Hughes you were job shadowing a colleague of yours. It was your first real week of working at the New York Times, and with how busy the team's schedule was you were sent down with Lewis from the sports column to report on… something hockey related. You weren’t really sure, and Lewis didn’t care to fill you in. 
You had never given hockey two thoughts when you were growing up. Your father wasn’t interested in any sports aside from the usual football game on thanksgiving (which you had a theory he just watched to get out of festive activities and house work). And anyway, there was only one local ice rink where you grew up so you’d never really had the opportunity to learn about the sport. 
All that to say, you had no idea what you were doing. You watched Lewis pin his “The Athletic” reporters badge, and you fiddled with your visitors pass as you waited for the press conference to start. 
When the conference did start, you jotted down notes absentmindedly on your notepad. About halfway through the meeting, your attention is immediately pulled to a side door where a few men stood, snickering and whispering to each other. 
One of the men noticed you though, smirking half-heartedly in your direction as he nodded his head towards you. That small action caused the rest of the boys to look over in your direction. Your face flushed, and before you could look away your eyes connected with those of maybe the cutest guy you’ve ever seen. His hair was brown and overgrown, and his whole face lit up when he laughed. 
“Ow!” you whispered, rubbing your arm to try and alleviate the pain that was Lewis elbow knocking into your side. He pointed to the man speaking at the front of the room, and immediately looked away from you with an annoyed expression etched onto his face. “i’m sorry,” you whispered to Lewis but he shook his head in response. “pay attention.” his harsh tone brought you back to reality, and with one more glance at the cute man in the corner, you return all your attention back to the conference. 
⋆ ★
“Journalists still use notepads?” a teasing voice asks, and when you lift your head up from your notebook you see the same man from earlier staring at you. 
“We use recorders too but I'm just job shadowing so I didn’t think I needed it. Lewis the-” you stop your sentence short, well aware of the fact that this guy probably didn’t care about your writing tools or your coworker. 
The guy surprises you though. He leans against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest and nods at you to continue. 
“Lewis, he works for the athletic paper. anyway, i was assigned to shadow him today because the woman who i was going to shadow had this breaking news story she had to cover,” 
“why didn’t you go with her?” the man asks, genuinely curious. 
“Well it's my first week and the woman is really particular about how she works. She said if I followed her she’d only get distracted,” you finish your story with the shrug of your shoulder. 
the guy nods in understanding before he pushes himself off and away from the wall. He squints a little and points to your name tag.
“Oh, i’m Y/n” you say, adjusting your name tag so he could read it properly. 
“I'm Jack” he smiles at you, and before either of you has time to say anything else, Lewis walks over to you grumbling. 
“It’s time to go,” 
you smile politely at Jack and he reciprocates. 
“See you around, Y/n” he raises his hand in a boyish fashion before retreating out of the hallway. 
⋆ ★
“It's so cold!” you shivered, voice quivering as you try to warm yourself up with the palm of your hands. you decided not to wear a coat tonight, against your better judgements, and now the frigid Manhattan air came to bite you in the ass. 
your friend nodded, teeth chattering as you two ran across the street and down the next block. 
your friends apartment came up first, and so she rushes out a quick goodbye before you set off down the street again. 
“Fuck! Where am I?” you hear a mans voice ask off in the distance. You wouldn’t normally try and investigate, but when you looked up and saw the familiar mop of brown hair, you made the decision to go over and talk to him.
“Jack?” you asked, hands still rubbing up and down your arms to try and provide you some warmth. 
Jack looks up startled, and once he recognizes it's you he relaxes again.
“Y/n right? From work?” he asks, and you nod as you step closer to him. The street lamps illuminate his face perfectly, hues of yellow and orange highlighting his features well.
“Yeah,” you nodded, face twisting in confusion as you watch Jack shrug out of his jacket. 
“I’ll let you wear my coat if you help me get.. here” Jack points to the blue destination point on his phone. 
You weigh your options, you could take his coat and help him out.. Meaning that you got to spend more time with him.. or, you could go home to the warmth of your apartment..
You hold your hand out for his jacket, and Jack smiles as he passes it over to you. 
You peer at his phone, taking a mental note of where he’s trying to go before leading him in the right direction. 
“Have you ever used google maps before?” you laugh teasingly, watching as the direction changes and the walk time gets shorter. “you were going in the complete opposite direction”
Jack chuckles, “my bad” 
The walk is silent for a minute, before Jack starts questioning you. “So… Do you usually take walks with strangers?”
“You're not a stranger, I met you like two days ago” you joke, knowing full well it's probably not wise to walk the streets with a man you've only ever spoken a few sentences to. 
Jack nods, and when you glance in his direction you see the hint of a smile grace his lips. “So, have you lived here long?” Jack asked at a stoplight. 
“I’ve lived in Manhattan for a year now. I did an internship last year for journalism and then they hired me” you explain as the walking light turns on and you both cross the street. “What about you? How long have you been in jersey?”
“I live in Jersey for the hockey season. I've been in Jersey for 4 years now? I think?” Jack speaks, stuffing his hands into the pocket of his NJD hoodie. “I grew up in Canada though, and I live in Michigan during the summers'' he explains.
“I’m from Denver, but I don't go visit much. I went to college here on the east coast and ended up staying through the summers to work” you speak, surprised at how easy it is to talk to Jack.
“I didn’t go to school,” Jack blurts out, and you bring your arm up to try and disguise your giggles as a cough. Jack seems embarrassed by his small outburst and quickly clarifies, “like I was drafted and went straight to the nhl” 
“That must’ve been hard” you hum, and Jack quirks an eyebrow at you. “Like, having to be in the real world so soon”
“you moved on your own at 18”
“Yeah but I moved for school. You were straight into the pros. That must've been a lot of pressure” 
Jack doesn’t respond, but you can tell by the way he’s carrying himself that your words rang true. 
“Anyway,” you pick up the conversation. “I really like living here. Yeah my hours are kind of insane, and rent is beyond… but I really like the city” 
“I think i’d live here,” Jack replies as he surveys the mostly empty streets. “there's always so much to do”
You nod, getting ready to cross the next street. “Uh, where are you going?” you call out, as Jack starts walking down the wrong street.
“There's a pizza place!” he says simply, and you stare at him confusedly before he explains. “I’m going to a bar, I can't drink without eating something” Jack shrugs and you walk to where he paused. He points to the small 24 hour pizza shop he wants to go to, and you both walk inside. 
After you both order, and you're sitting at your table with your food, you start to question things. “So, why were you wandering the streets? How did you get here from Jersey?” you ask, blowing on your steaming pizza before you take a bite. 
Jack mirrors you, taking a bite before he answers. “My friends and I all came together. They went out for dinner first but there was this shop I wanted to check out, they’ve got sick shoes, anyway that's not the point. they dropped me off at the store and so my plan was to just walk and meet up with them after but I… well got lost” 
You and Jack continue talking, time completely slipping by both of your minds as you let the conversation flow. You learnt that Jack did in fact like to read, and you made sure to give him a few recommendations before you both parted ways. 
“Do you want your jacket back?” you ask, already starting to shrug out of the warm material. 
He holds up a hand to stop you, “No you should wear it its cold-”
“I'm just walking back to my apartment I should be fine,” you say, shimmying your shoulder and letting the sleeve fall from your arm.
“Do you want me to walk with you?” Jack's question stuns you. 
“Aren’t you supposed to meet up with your friends?”
Jack only shrugs, “it’s only like 12 i’ve got plenty of time to catch up with them”
You nod slowly as you readjust Jack's coat on your body. 
“Plus, wouldn’t want you to take up any other stranger if they ask for directions” Jack jokes, “might make me jealous” 
You knew his comment was supposed to be a joke but… butterflies. Literal butterflies. 
Fifteen minutes later and you were outside of your apartment building. 
“Thank you” you say, “for the pizza and for letting me wear your jacket” 
Jack smiles at you brightly, and you couldn't help but smile back at him. It was like a natural reaction. 
“Thank you for taking me to where I needed to go,” Jack takes his turn in thanking you.
“But I didn't..” 
“It's the thought that counts” Jack grins as he pulls out his phone. “But, since you didn’t walk me to where i was going… i’ll accept your number as an apology”
“Apology?” you laughed, placing a hand over your heart and pretending to be shocked by his words. “If I recall you were the one who wanted to stop for pizza and to walk me home” 
“You're right, you're right,” Jack says, holding his hands up in mock surrender. 
“But I will give you my number,” you say, holding your hand out to accept Jack's phone. When you pass his phone back, your contact fresh in his list, Jack beams. 
“I’ll call you!” Jack yells out as he starts walking down the street. 
“How about you text me when you make it to the bar!” you shout back. “And by the way! You're going in the wrong direction!” you shout again, and Jack sighs loudly. He dramatically turns around before walking your way again. 
Before he has the time to say anything more, you give him a few directions so he doesn’t get anymore lost. 
Less than 30 minutes later, while finishing up your skincare routine, your phone lights up with a notification. 
Jack H: I made it! Thanks for tonight and for the directions
You went to sleep that night with a smile plastered onto your face.
⋆ ★
After that first “date” you and Jack routinely made plans to hang out. It started off with Jack texting you whenever he happened to be in the city, which then translated to you inviting him to all the new places in town you wanted to try. 
“I don't know how I feel about that,” Jack speaks in between spoonfuls of his ice cream. You two had just gotten out of an exhibit, something about ancient rome. 
“What? You never think about the roman empire?” you retort, thinking about Jack's interview that was posted earlier in the year. Jack rolled his eyes at you, but he smiled nonetheless. 
“Like, how do they even have all that stuff? It's been so long” 
“Yeah.. the armour was cool though,” you respond, shuffling across the crosswalk with Jack trailing after you. 
There’s a brief pause as you walk up White Street towards the little italian restaurant Jack wanted to stop at. 
“So, I was looking online and there’s this new exhibition popping up soon. Something about the elements and sensors… I don't know, it looked cool” Jack breaks the silence, and you have to bite back your smile. He was looking up exhibits for the two of you to go to? Last week he was talking about how much he didn't understand modern art!
“Since when are you interested in the arts?” you tease, knocking your shoulder against Jacks playfully. He looks down at you, eyes crinkled as he smiles. 
“It’s something to do,” Jack shrugs, “plus, let's not lie here! You’d love to hang out with me more,” Jack laughs teasingly, but you can sense the hope that lies beneath his words. 
“I’d love to hang out with you” your hand brushed against Jack without your knowledge. Your hand feels like it's on fire from the small contact. 
“It's a date then!” Jack cheers, grabbing ahold of your hand to steer you in the right direction. You could only hope he meant a real date. 
⋆ ★
The exhibit was great, but your time with Jack was even better. He always found ways to make even the most mundane things light up with colour. By the end of the night, you were positive that if you didn't ask Jack out on an official date, you’d lose your mind. 
Jack, ever the gentlemen, walked you up all 6 floors of your apartment. “I had a lot of fun tonight,” you say as soon as you reach your front door. 
Jack nods, easily agreeing with you. “I think i’m a changed man, that art thing was so cool” 
You laughed lightly, leaning against your door as you watched Jack ruffle his hair with his hand. “My turn to pick the activity next time?” you ask. 
“Yeah but no more ancient rome things” Jack easily jokes. 
“How about something more…” you hedge, unsure of how to ask Jack out. Of course you’ve asked him to go out places before but… this was very different. 
Jack leans against the staircase railing, tilting his head signalling for you to continue.
“Like…” you contine, all words escaping you as your attention is suddenly caught to the sight of his bare arms.
“A date?” Jack prompts, smirking as he catches you staring at him. 
Upon hearing the word date you're immediately crashing back to reality. Your hearts beating wildly, something you hadn’t felt since the early days of university. 
You nod, “yeah, yeah.. Like a date” you shake your head to clear it, and when you meet Jack's eyes he beams. 
“I’ll be waiting for you to text me the location then…” Jack's voice trails as he walks closer to you, leaning in as he presses a quick kiss to your check.
You stand there momentarily stunned, watching as he slowly walks backwards to the top of your floor's staircase. “I’ll see you on our date?” Jack calls out, and you mirror his bright smile. 
“I’ll see you on our date!” you call back, watching as Jack starts walking down the stairs. 
you were falling hard. 
⋆ ★
The big date came and went, and you and Jack continued dating silently. It was nice just being with him, away from all the pressures of his fans and his large social media presence. You had a small private account, so you would post some pictures on there, but you never officially went “public” with your relationship. 
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That didnt mean there weren’t close calls though. With Jack being extremely popular, there were a few times when the two of you were photographed out by fans. 
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After the first incident, you thought nothing of it. Of course someone would see you guys eventually. Although you weren’t sure how you felt about being photographed by random people out in public… Jack was always quick to reassure you that people would eventually forget about the photos. 
It wasn’t the forgetting you were worried about though. After being with Jack for a few months, your twitter feed started recommending you hockey content. Which was fine at first, until you saw all the speculations of yours and Jack's relationship.
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You muted all the hockey terms you could think of on your twitter account… but that didn’t stop you from thinking of all those accounts words. Was it true that you weren’t Jack's type? Is that why he wasn’t posting you on his social media accounts? Did he actually prefer going to small coffee shops and art exhibitions? Or was he trying to hide you from the outside world? 
Even though you knew you liked your relationship being private… Was there an ulterior motive on Jack's end? Did he not find you pretty enough to post on main? You started to spiral. 
⋆ ★
The bar was much more crowded than you would've liked, but when your boyfriend invited you out you easily agreed. 
You sat in the corner of the booth all night, sipping on your vodka sodas and listening in on the conversation around you. The devils were doing good so far this season, and as a result, Jack had decided it was time to drag you out with him to the bar. You wished he hadn’t.
It’s not like you were an insecure person… (that was somewhat a lie), but when every girl was gorgeous and hitting on your boyfriend… it made you doubt things.
You watched all night as Jack looked at other girls, and your spiralling started to feel a lot more real. 
“Who is she?” you screamed, tears streaming down your face as your boyfriend of two years stared at you in shock.
“Baby, she doesn’t mean anything to me! I swear! It's you who-”
“When was the last time you slept together?” you shouted, your boyfriend winced at your biting words. 
“Last weekend…” your boyfriend finally admitted the truth. You had your suspicions that he was cheating on you for weeks now… and each time you brought it up he convinced you that you were crazy. “But baby!” his voice was frantic as you grabbed your bag and started shoving things into it. 
Your eyes were wild as you stared into the eyes of the boy that you had loved. When he had nothing else to say, you zipped up your bag and left. Your chest arched and your heart burned… you promised that you would never let yourself get cheated on again. 
A blonde touches Jack's arm. You know this because you're watching it happen, right in front of your eyes. You swig your now warm soda, blinking hard to will away the tears. 
You look away from the sight, causing you to miss the way Jack's eyes immediately try to seek yours after he brushes the girl away. 
The drive to your apartment was quiet. 
“Baby, what's wrong?” Jack asks, and despite how much you want to call him out, you feel juvenile about it. 
“Nothing,” you sigh, shifting in your seat so that you can look at Jack. He looks at you tenderly, as if whatever mysterious thing that's hurting you is hurting him too. 
“You can tell me anything, you know that right?” Jack speaks up again a minute later, this time his eyes are trained on the road. 
“I know,” you whisper. “I’m just tired. Work was busy today”
Jack hummed in response, and that was the end of the conversation. As usual, he walked you up to your apartment, and then you kissed him goodbye. 
When he left you stayed up in bed and questioned everything. You knew you were being insecure, but were you paranoid too? You didn’t want to be hurt again and you were fearful that you would be cheated on again. It was irrational, you knew. But your ex was always being hit on and he took one of the girls up on… no. You wouldn’t let that man ruin anything else in your life. 
Everythings fine… you whisper to yourself, and soon enough you fall asleep.
⋆ ★
Things got worse from then on. Whenever Jack was gone on roadies you would read through every comment you could find about Jack’s types, his ex gfs, anything that you could find. You couldn’t help but compare yourself to them. It was like some cruel, sick addiction that you needed to keep up with. 
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“She's just a friend! What are you talking about?” Jack was immediately defensive when you brought up his liking habits.
“Listen, I’m not trying to be some insecure girlfriend but-”
“You are insecure!” Jack's voice is loud and his words slice through you like swords. 
Your eyes immediately start to water, “baby, I didn’t mean it” Jack rushes to your side, hand on your shoulder as he tries to get a good look at you. 
“I’m sorry…” you cry, your hands coming up to shield your face away from him. 
“No, I'm sorry. You're not insecure you’re right” Jack tries to soothe you but your mind goes numb. 
Baby, she doesn’t mean anything to me! But baby! baby, I didn’t mean it…
You let Jack drag you over to the couch, where you spend the rest of the night cuddling and watching some movie that was really just static noise. 
Your chest aches and your heart burns, but you knew that Jack was right. You were insecure. You didn't think you were as pretty as the girls who wanted him, and now you certainly didn’t think you were deserving of an instagram post. 
Baby, she doesn’t mean anything to me! But baby! baby, I didn’t mean it…
Baby, she doesn’t mean anything to me! But baby! baby, I didn’t mean it…
Baby, she doesn’t mean anything to me! But baby! baby, I didn’t mean it…
⋆ ★
After that night, you tried to distance yourself from Jack Hughes. When he was on roadies, you would take extra long to reply to his texts. You were also suddenly picking up more hours at work, volunteering to cover stories nobody wanted to cover. 
On the other side of things, Jack was confused. He had thought after his apologies that everything would be fine? He thought you needed space, so he gave you plenty. But now it seemed like the two of you weren’t even together anymore. 
“Dude, just talk to her” Trevor's voice was somehow still loud over the phone. 
“Yeah but she wants space” Jack sighed, as if Trevor had no idea how girls worked. 
“Okay… and did she tell you that?”
“I can tell” 
Trevor shuffled on the other end of the line. “Okay Jack, listen. You guys have been together what? A year now? You can’t just throw away your whole relationship because she may or may not be a little insecure. Why don't you talk to her? Like actually sit and figure this out” 
For the first time, Jack thought, Trevor was making some sense.
“I want to be with you! Do you want to be with me?” Jack's voice was unintentionally rough and loud as he questioned you. 
“Of course I want to be with you!” your voice is just as loud. 
“Then what's the big deal!” Jack is visibly annoyed as if you're some person that's wasting his time.   
“Well, don’t like other girls' instagram posts and stare at models in public!” you retort, crossing your arms childishly. Jack throws his hands up in the air, sighing loudly. 
“I like you, what don't you understand?” Jack enunciates each word loudly and waves his hands around wildly in some effort to make his point clear.
“Why can't you understand that I just need some reassurance!” you cry out, completely worn out by this conversation. 
“Reassurance? I’m not going to cheat on you! Why do you think so low of me?” Jack pauses, seeming to connect the dots in his head. “Oh. this is about him” Jacks voice turns cold and you feel the oncoming sting in your throat. 
“Just because you’ve been cheated on before doesn’t mean that it's going to happen again.” your cheeks felt wet. Were you crying? 
“I don't think you’re going to cheat on me” you whisper, arms wrapping around yourself in a bad attempt at trying to calm yourself down. 
Jack stands still, staring at you with glaring eyes. 
“I just want… I want…” you can't even finish your sentence. You didn’t know what you wanted. You just felt so bad about yourself. 
Jack stares, nodding his head in exasperation as he watches you cry. “Yeah, well, when you figure that out call me” 
“Jack please,” you call to him through tears, following him down your hallway as you watch him walk away. 
You never called. 
⋆ ★
A month went by, and you felt the breakup in every aspect of your life. Work reminded you of that first day with Jack. Your apartment reminded you of all the times he would walk you home… you missed him. 
“We’re going out tonight! Enough being sad” your coworker, Claudia, exclaimed as she walked into your apartment. She was holding a saks bag, no doubt filled to the brim with outfit options for the night ahead. 
“I’m not feeling it” you mumble, eyes immediately finding focus on your tv screen. 
“It's been a month yn.. If you don't go out now, you're never going to” Claudia's voice is soft. She sets the bag of clothes beside you on the couch, and she silent starts showing you your options. 
“That ones cute” your voice is muffled but Claudia hears you anyway. 
“Perfect!” She smiles, setting your choice to the side and pulling out a plastic bag full of accessories. 
You felt ridiculous. You were wearing heels much too small, and your dress was way too tight. The drinks though… definitely hit the spot. And after a while, you didn’t think of Jack at all. 
“I’m having so  much fun!” your words were slurred as you slung one of your arms around Claudia's shoulder. She smiled happily at you, tipsily swaying your hips so you were both dancing to the beat of the music that was blasting throughout the club. 
“Is that…?” Claudia starts but then abruptly stops, almost as if she had seen a ghost. 
“Is that what!” you shout cheerfully, spinning yourself and Claudia around so that you could see what she saw. 
“Y/n don't!” Claudia tries to reposition you but it is too late. 
In the middle of the dance floor stood Jack Hughes, your Jack Hughes, and some girl that looked oddly familiar. As if sensing your gaze, the girl turned. It was the girl from instagram. 
“I’m going to be sick!” you moaned, hand covering your mouth as Claudia quickly rushes you outside of the club. Luckily, the two of you make it outside rather quickly, and then you're heaving onto the streets of New York. 
“I am so sorry! I had no idea that he’d be here!” Claudia speaks apologetically, holding your hair out of your face as you continue dry heaving. 
“He's with.. Oh my god” you emptied out what must've been everything in your stomach. “Claudia, he's with her!” you cried, drunkenly leaning into your friends side. Claudia grabbed hold of you, walking you down the street so that the two of you could hail a cab. “I know, i’m so sorry”
Once you were situated in the cab, you leaned your head against the window and closed your eyes. You pictured the look on Jack’s face when he saw you. Surprise, then shock, was it regret next? You weren’t sure. Then you imagined the girl he was with. Pretty, and perfect, and you wanted to cry all over again. 
“I'm blocking him!” you slurred, pulling out your phone and heading straight to your contacts. Claudia nodded along, concern etched in every feature on her face. 
Your hand hovers over the block button. “No! I’m deleting him! He's done. I don't ever want to talk to him again!” you cry, ignoring the cab driver's face as he looks on in disapproval.
“Do what will make you feel better hun,” Claudia speaks to you softly, giving you the courage to block and delete Jack from your phone and life. 
⋆ ★
After that night, you were steadily getting sick. You thought nothing of it at first, chalking up all your symptoms to stress and your recent breakup. It wasn’t until you checked your email that your world stopped spinning. 
Amazon: Upcoming Delivery
Hi Yn Ln,
This confirms your purchase from Tampax
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Your phone fell to the ground with a large thud, and you ran to your kitchen to check your calendar. You flipped through the pages, looking for the little red dots that signified the days that you had gotten your period. You flipped through the months.
February
January
December
You couldn’t think as you stuffed your feet into your ugg boots. You put your jacket on while you half-ran down the stairs, and if it weren’t for the man on the 3rd floor grabbing your arm to steady you, you would've crashed down the remaining flights. 
Your nearest bodega was only one block away, and when you got there a minute later, panting and trying to catch your breath, reality had finally set in. 
Your breathing was laboured and loud as you came to a stop in front of the pregnancy tests. How was this your life? 
You bought one of every kind, and you tried to ignore the burning gaze of the cashier who rang all your items through. 
“That’ll be $65.24” 
It seemed like less than a minute later you were back in your apartment. All of your surroundings blur into nothingness as you pull the tests out of your coat jacket. 
You stumble into your bathroom, slam the door shut behind you, and peel off your leggings. 
You decide to take all the tests at once, leaving only two for backups in case you did something wrong. The last test shook violently in your hand, and only then did you realize that you were crying. 
Positive
Pregnant
+
Two lines
⋆ ★
The first thing you had done when you found out you were pregnant last night was block Jack Hughes. He was the only person you had slept with in the past 3 months, and in your frustration you blamed him. Your relationship was over with, he had moved on, and now you were pregnant? Life was cruel. 
After a long debate, a night full of crying, and an afternoon of rest and relaxation… you decided it was best that you told Jack about the pregnancy. 
You type in Jack's contact: a nickname, two white hearts and a sword emoji that represented something you couldn’t quite recall in your panic induced state. When his nickname showed no results, you hit the backspace button and typed in his full name, which you assumed you might have switched to when you saw him out with another girl. 
No result. 
You dropped your phone into the sink with a loud clatter. 
fuck. 
That night's events replayed in your mind like a bad film. You had blocked and deleted Jack's contact. 
You wipe the tears from your eyes with the back of your hand, breathing in deeply as you reach into the sink and pick up your phone. Everythings fine… you have him on instagram. You can just message him there. 
jackhughes
unblock
Life truly was cruel, you thought, sobs racking your body as you let yourself slide onto your bathroom floor. 
You unblocked Jack, only to find that his follow was removed. 
It's fine… you reassured yourself as you hit the unblock button and started drafting your message. He’ll see it. He has too. 
⋆ ★
You checked to see if he had seen the dm the next evening, and to your surprise, you were blocked.
Tears immediately started blurring your vision and you couldn't help but cry out in pain. 
What the fuck were you going to do.
part two
1K notes · View notes
talaok · 9 months
Text
The Pause
Pairing: Javier Peña x fem!reader
Summary: You and your colleague Javier Peña have never gotten along, but with just a simple proposition that started off as a joke, it turns out you do work well together in some areas.
Warnings: smut| fingering, oral sex (f receiving), squirting, protected p in v sex (ik me writing that they use a condom? Incredible), praising, size-kink, and reader is not shaved (bc lets be honest now yo girl is so over that) 
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A roll of the eyes and a loud enough huff... the usual warm greeting reserved for your colleague.
"Good morning to you too" he mocked, raising his head as you sat at the desk in front of him.
"had a rough night?" he continued, wanting nothing more than to see that look on your face when he poked you just enough.
"Well I had a great one" he informed you like you cared, as he lit a cigarette.
"I'm sure you did" you finally spoke "Which one was it tonight? My money’s on Vanessa, you have a sweet spot for her"
He let out a small chuckle, knowing he had gotten exactly what he wanted.
He would have never admitted it out loud, but he loved your daily banter, and even more, he loved your smart mouth.
"Is that Jealousy I hear?"
Now was your turn to laugh "You wish, Peña" you smirked, "the day I'll start being jealous of you and your special friends I'll have officially gone insane"
His eyes slowly analyzed your face, making you feel more uncomfortable than you liked to admit 
" I think it wouldn't hurt you, you know?"
"what?" you sighed, organizing some files somebody had left on your desk during the night.
"a good fuck"
Your eyes shot up to his, a mix of disappointment and annoyance firing out of them.
"Unlike you, I'm not really into paying for it" you tilted your head, watching his hazel eyes closely "and not that it's any of your business, but I'm fine in that department"
"How long has it been?" he asked, like he knew, like he knew he was annoyingly right.
It had been a dry month, hell, a dry year.
"why, are you offering?" you raised an eyebrow, not backing off.
"why... are you refusing?" he mirrored your expression, a smug grin tugging at his lips.
Your breathing slowed, and time stopped for an infinite instant, all the office's noises blurred in the background as wrong, wrong images filled your brain.
like the one where that same mouth draped around that cigarette crashed with your own... or the one where his big, strong hand wrapped around your neck as his breath fanned against your lips, or the one where...
"good morning"
A whimper left your mouth, and as quickly as you tried turning away from Javier, you didn't miss the smug smile growing on his lips, or the way his eyes searched every inch of your face.
Fuck
"Hi Steve" you cleared your throat, praying to whoever was listening that the crimson painting your cheeks would be blamed on the heat.
The blonde nodded at you with a genuine smile as you willed your breathing to even out.
"Messina said two of us gotta go check out something"
"something?" Peña asked
"Yeah apparently there's a guy that might be able to give us some information" Steve shrugged
He said two, didn't he?
The look on Javier's face certainly cleared out any doubts you might have had.
Oh no. no way in hell I'm spending the whole day with him after what happened not even a minute ago.
"I'll stay behind" you blurted out, earning a frown from Steve and an amused grin from Peña.
You weren't fooling him
You were never one to back down on these things. You wanted to go on the field as much as possible, and they both knew that.
"I just-" you muttered, trying to come up with a believable excuse "I have some things I need to finish up here anyway"
If Steve wasn't convinced, he didn't show it, but Javier on the other hand... Javier was looking at you like he could read every single thought crossing your mind.
"alright" Murphy sighed "Let's go then, Peña," he said, giving you a farewell nod before starting down the elevator
Javier lingered for a moment longer, bending much closer than he needed to as he put out his cigarette in the ashtray between your desks.
"Goodbye y/n" he spoke lowly "I'll be back"
and to anyone that would have sounded like a normal thing to say, but to you... to you, it sounded only like a threat.
__ __ __
Turns out you didn't need to lie, turns out that there actually was a lot of shit to do at the office.
The hotline had been buzzing all day, and being that you were the only dea agent available, most calls had to go through you, plus all the reports to go over and the forms to fill... you didn't even realize how much time had passed before Messina startled you as she walked out of her office.
"Goodnight agent" she called, making you glance up from your desk for the first time in the past two hours.
"goodnight" you called absentmindedly, as you took in the office... it was deserted, not one single soul at their desk.
What time is it?
You glanced at the clock hanging on the wall to your right
9:30 pm 
9:30 pm?
When the fuck did that happen?
the elevator dinged in the distance as your boss stepped into it.
You must be seeing things, because there's no way in hell... nope, the clock was still telling the same exact time.
"fuck" you exhaled into the empty room, running a hand down the length of your face.
Ok, it's definitely time to go home.
You glanced at the papers on your desk and divided them into two piles, one of them going into your drawer, and the other in Messina's office.
You sighed heavily as you got up, the old chair creaking under your weight.
The click of your heels against the tiles echoed off the walls as you made your way to the Messina's door.
She's not gonna be happy about how many papers she's gonna have to look over in the morning...
You turned the doorknob and the door emanated a soft shriek as you pushed it open.
You walked to the desk and just when you were about to drop those papers on it, a voice rumbled from beside you
"You waited"
You gasped, turning around immediately in shock
"Jesus Christ!" you breathed, realizing who it was "You scared me"
"I'm sorry sweetheart" Javier spoke softly
sweetheart? When did that happen? And when did my body get permission to react this way?
He was leaning on the doorframe, his arm crossed over his broad chest.
"what are you doing here?" you asked, retracting your hand from your hammering heart and finally setting the files on the desk.
"I told you I'd be back" he put simply "We never got to finish our talk this morning"
You swallowed what felt like sand in your mouth,
A part of you, a naive, stupid part of you, was hoping he would have already forgotten about that, but of course, it's Javier F. Peña we're talking about, and when it's about torturing you... you can be sure he'll never forget anything.
"what talk?" you lied through your teeth
maybe miracles are real, maybe he'll just let it go.
He didn't respond, he didn't need to, he saw right through you.
He smirked instead, uncrossing his arms and taking a step towards you.
Now your heart wasn't racing from the scare, this was all him.
You were the only people in the office, hell, the building probably, and he was right there in front of you, looking at you like he could see right through your clothes.
"You paused" he murmured, now towering over you
"What are you talking about?"
Fake it until you make it, right?
"You paused this morning"
You frowned, pretending not to know exactly what he was talking about “Listen Peña I gotta go home, so if you-“ you moved out of his way, starting towards the door, but before you could actually exit the room, his hand on your wrist stopped you, making you turn around
“Do you want me to fuck you, agent y/l/n?”
To say heat rushed to your face was an understatement
“What the fuck?” 
“Oh don’t look so surprised, I saw how you looked at me before” he cooed, wetting his lips 
“And how did I look at you?” you shook your arm out of his hold, just for him to get even closer to you, his body now inches away from your own
“Like you wanted me to say just that” he murmured “like you wanted me to bend you over your desk and take you right there in the middle of the office”
A breath got caught in your throat, and as much as you wanted to get out of his penetrating gaze, you couldn't do anything but stare at those endless wells of brown.
I don't know what to say, What the fuck could I say?
The same pleased grin was adorning his lips, and for a moment you pondered whether you wanted to smack or kiss it off of him.
"I don't know what you're talking about" you managed to say, praying you sounded more confident than you actually felt
"c'mon sweetheart" he chuckled "I know you want it" he breathed, ducking closer so he could whisper in your ear as he moved some hair out of your face "A good fuck wouldn't hurt you... you're always so tense"
He drawled out his words like spells
"You're confident for a man who needs to pay women to fuck them"
he smiled amusedly at that
"Is that a challenge?"
"most definitely not" You ignored the shiver running up your spine
he raised his head again so that he could look at you
"There's nothing to be ashamed of, y'know," he said "It would just be two friends helping each other out"
"since when are we friends?"
"fine then" he agreed "Two colleagues"
Was he being serious?
Did I fall asleep at my desk and this is just some fucked up lucid dream?
"c'mon baby" he persisted, his hands finding your waist "I can make you feel real good"
"Peña..." you breathed, trying to get your mind to collaborate and realize what a fucking mistake you were about to make
"yes, sweetheart?" the bastard asked, his voice dropping an octave.
You gulped, cursing yourself internally
There was no turning back, your mind was already made up... and he knew it too.
You glanced out the door.
No one was here,
No one would ever have to know about this.
"If I agree... we'll never speak of this again ok?" you stated "This never happened"
The widest grin you'd ever seen split his face
"You sure about that, baby?" he murmured, "that way..." he brought his right thumb to your mouth, slowly tracing its shape "How will you be able to beg me to do it again?" 
You snorted "please"
"Ok, how about this" he proposed then "I promise to never speak of it again, if after we're done... You can sincerely tell me that that wasn't the best sex of your life"
You laughed again, "fine"
"You can't lie" he reminded you, his mouth now ghosting yours
"I won't" you repeated "Now can you please just-"
"Gladly" he muttered, but before you had time to respond or think of any other rules to impose, his lips were already on yours, and his tongue had slipped into your mouth
He was...hungry
Both his hands wrapped around your waist and he picked you up like you weighed less than a feather.
The squeak you let out was muffled by his mouth, but you somehow managed to wrap your legs and arms around him in the haze.
his hands were on your ass, and the groan he let out didn't even try to hide just how much he liked them there.
You could feel his mustache, taste his cigarettes, and his scent was wrapped around you like a mantel, and god you hated admitting it but it felt good, he felt good
And you were so caught up in everything that your body was feeling for the first time in so long, that you didn't even realize he hadn't stayed still, but in fact, had walked you right in front of Messina's desk and was now sitting you on it.
Oh god
Why did it now just tick that you were in your boss' office?
"changed your mind yet?" 
Javier on the other hand, couldn't have cared less
"From just a kiss?" you teased, cocking an eyebrow
He snickered, parting your legs so he could fit in between them.
His mouth trailed away from yours until it found your ear "Well I am very talented with my mouth" he murmured, before biting your lobe.
You wouldn't have even realized you had moaned if it wasn't for that smug smirk on his face.
"Oh don't worry" he cooed, his mouth now lowering to kiss your neck "I'll show you in a minute"
His lips started a slow, torturous trail down your neck, each peck sending a ripple of warmth to your core, and when his teeth grazed your collarbones, then you couldn't do anything but whimper, as you threw your head back.
You couldn't see him, but you sure as hell could feel that smile on his lips.
Next was your blouse, he took his time gently undoing each button, reserving a kiss for every new inch of skin he uncovered, until the fabric wasn't doing anything to cover up your bra, and all he needed, and hence did, was to get rid of your shirt.
"fuck" he muttered mostly to himself, all his eagerness showing for a moment as he removed your black bra like his life was on the line "Where have you been hiding all this?"
"I haven't been hiding anything, and you know it" you scoffed "I catch you staring at least twice a day"
A soft chuckle fled his throat "Can you blame me?" he asked, his eyes focused on your body "I mean look at you" his hands traveled up your belly until they were cupping your tits "You belong in a museum"
And you knew he had probably said that same line to more girls than you could ever imagine, but the blush on your cheeks rose nonetheless.
But before you had time to lie and ask just how many those girls were, he had ducked and sucked your left nipple into his mouth.
"oh shit" you whispered, hypnotized by the image in front of you.
He caught you staring as he opened his eyes, and just when you were expecting a snarky comment, he only smirked before taking your other nipple into your mouth.
This time you closed your eyes as you moaned just to be safe.
He let go of your skin with a pop, making you whimper.
"Can I take off your skirt sweetheart?"
What is this, a joke?
"mh-mh" you hummed
"All the sudden you don't wanna talk?" he mocked "Use your words baby"
You had to fight the urge to roll your eyes 
"Yes, Javier, you can take off my skirt"
A smirk pulled at his lips
"Good girl"
If you were wet before, those two words had now rendered you completely drenched, and that look on his face told you he knew exactly what he was doing
His fingers quickly slipped under your skirt, and before you knew it, you were sitting in front of him in only a pair of black panties, and your work heels.
You were breathing as if you'd just run a marathon once he started peeling your panties off of you.
"wait" you suddenly remembered 
"What is it sweetheart?" he stopped
"I-" all the sudden you were embarrassed "I didn't shave"
he looked at you like you'd just told him to go fuck himself
"Baby girl, you're insulting me" he cooed, stoking your sides "You take me for a man who cares about that sort of thing?"
"Oh," you breathed "I just-"
"You got me all wrong sweetheart" he shook his head, slowly kneeling between your knees and gradually taking off your panties in the process.
"god, you're beautiful" he breathed, once you were entirely bare before him.
And again, red crept up your cheeks.
He picked one of your legs up and unhurriedly bent down to kiss you just above your ankle, and then your calves, and then your knee, and then all the way to your inner thigh, until you were screaming internally and your heart was beating faster than you thought humanly possible.
he took his time placing your foot on the chair next to him, so you were spread wide for him, and then did the same thing all over again to your other leg, only changing his routine when he placed your leg on his shoulder instead of the chair.
You were close to hyperventilating.
"Javier..."
"What sweetheart?" he teased, his lips now inches from where your body was begging him to be "You're already desperate?"
"You-You wish" you lied
He chuckled, and the vibrations of his voice went straight to your core, making you whimper
"no?" he taunted, kissing you even closer to your cunt
"no- just-" you swallowed
"what? Tell me what you want baby"
"You know what I want" you begged
"I do, but I wanna hear you say it" he murmured, kissing you just above your pussy "I want to hear you begging me to lick this pretty pussy of yours"
"That's not going to happen" you breathed
He grinned "You sure?" his lips lowered to kiss your clit
"fuck" you moaned with a thread of voice
"You sure you don't want me to?" he asked again, his lips now finding your hole "'cause that would be a damn shame..." he continued, the tip of his tongue now finding your core for just a second "You look fucking delicious baby"
"I-" you stuttered, shutting your eyes "Javier c'mon"
"I want to hear you say it, princess" he smirked, "What's the magic word?"
And fuck him, but you were desperate
"Please" you surrendered "Please Javier just-"
The rest of your sentence died in your throat as he finally dove down, taking your pussy into his mouth.
"Javi" you whimpered, clutching his head to your body with one hand and gripping the desk with the other.
You had never called him Javi a day in your life, but this seemed as good a time as any.
He sucked on your clit first, stretching it into his mouth and going back again and again making you squirm and desperate to come, before starting to devour every other inch of you, licking up and down and swirling his tongue over your nub, getting drunk on your taste.
"Shit- oh my fucking god" you panted, losing every bit of decency you had and grinding against him.
His mustache was tickling your skin, only making you want to moan louder.
Good thing you were the only people left in the office.
And just when you thought it couldn't get any better, two of his thick, long fingers plunged inside of you.
"Fuck-javi!" you screamed
he curled them inside you while he didn't even dream about stopping his work on your clit, and you couldn't do anything but arch your back as a series of obscenities left your mouth.
his other hand came up to palm your breasts and again, a shock of pleasure coursed through you as he added a third finger.
"Oh god- that's-" you moaned "Javi"
You didn't even know what to say, you just knew that you hadn't felt this good or full in far too much, if not ever.
Three fingers of his didn't even compare to the two of yours you had spent months using as some sort of relief.
"I love it when you say my name like that baby" he leaned away for just a moment to say, before resuming his work of art.
"f-fuck" you cried "Javi please"
"What is it sweetheart?" he asked, his fingers pushing in and out of you filling the room with an obscene sound.
You were soaked.
"Javi I think-" You felt your stomach start to shake as the orgasm was about to take hold but... but something wasn't right.
"fuck javi something's wrong I-" you moaned, 
You had never felt like this, it felt like... it felt like you were about to pee.
"I think I'm gonna-"
And before you had time to finish, he pitched your left nipple and a tsunami of pleasure washed you all the way to the shore as your vision went white.
You were sure your moans could be heard from outside of the building.
"Goddamit sweetheart" his deep voice brought you back to reality
You opened your eyes, and he was... he was glistening, and- and that wet spot on his shirt wasn't there before, was it?
"Did I-" Your eyes widened
 You...squirted? You didn't even know you were capable of something like that
"That was the hottest thing I've ever seen baby," he said, looking at you as if you'd just turned water to wine "Was this your first time?" 
"yeah" you nodded
A smile spread on his lips as he stood up again 
"You still sure you aren't gonna beg me to do that again?"
"God, I hate you" you breathed
"yeah? Enough to let me fuck you apparently" he murmured, before crashing his lips with yours, letting you taste yourself on his tongue.
"Shut up" you mustered, before he kissed you once again.
You racked your hands down his chest, fumbling to undo his shirt's buttons.
thank god he didn't wear a tie today
Once his shirt was off with his help, you let your hands move down his body until they found the bulge in his tight jeans.
"fuck" he groaned, as you palmed him through the fabric.
His belt was even harder to take off.
"Eager sweetheart?" he cooed, undoing his belt for you, and while he was at it, unzipping his pants.
"Shut up"
He smirked that same smug smirk he seemed to have stapled to his lips "We'll see who'll be the one who won't be able to talk in a minute" 
"I'm not sucking your dick, Peña"
"That's not what I'm talking about baby" he murmured, getting rid of his pants and boxers at the same time.
Your gaze lowered and- oh shit
"fuck" you muttered, not even realizing you had
He chuckled, his chest raising with his voice "What? Too big for you?" he mocked, kissing your cheek before trailing his mouth to your ear "Don't worry, I'll go slow just for you, sweetheart"
Your mouth was still agape, but you were finally able to tear your glare from his member.
"Do you-" you swallowed "Do you have a condom?" you remembered.
In no time he materialized one from the pocket of the jeans pooling at his feet.
"Of course" you huffed out a laugh.
He didn't pay you any mind you as he rolled on the condom, and you watched the motion, mesmerized by... well, by how big he was.
He caught you red-handed, and his grin only widened.
"Open your legs for me sweetheart" he ordered, and something in his tone made you oblige immediately.
He positioned himself at your entrance, taking his dick in his hand and sliding it between your folds.
"fuck" you moaned softly, closing your eyes
"I want you to look at me" he stopped you, "You look at me when I'm inside you, baby"
You hesitated a moment before doing as told, looking into his lust-filled eyes.
"Good girl" he praised you, before finally entering you.
"Oh my god" you moaned at the stretch.
"That was just the tip sweetheart" he smirked, pushing himself even deeper.
Just the tip?
You looked to where your bodies were meeting and, to your dismay... he was right
How is that all gonna fit?
"It's gonna fit" he read your mind, retracting his hips just to thrust himself deeper "You're gonna take it all like a good girl y/n" he murmured against your mouth, as his fingers found your clit "and then when I'm done with you" he forced his cock into you again making you quite literally scream "you're gonna feel so sore you're gonna remember me every time you take a step"
And with that, he drove his whole dick into you, making you bite your own lip so hard you could almost taste blood.
"God you feel good" he groaned, starting to find a slow pace "so fucking tight for me sweetheart"
"fuckfuckfuckfuck" was all you could cry out into the air
it was so big
and so deep
"I know" he cooed, kissing your neck, before fastening his pace.
"Javi!" you screamed, one of your hands going to grip his shoulder to keep you anchored to this world.
It was nothing like anything you'd ever felt. You could feel him everywhere, taking hold of every single part of your being.
"Look at you" he murmured, kissing ur lips again, even if they were parted as you gasped for air "Taking it so well" he cooed, his fingers resuming their work on your clit "Being such a good girl for me" he continued, his breath fanning against your mouth "letting me use this pretty pussy of yours" he groaned, as you sucked him right in "drenching me with all your juices" he growled "so so good"
"javi please" you moaned
"do you even know what you're begging for?" he asked "Or are you so cock drunk that brain of yours has stopped working?"
"I-" You tried to come up with a comeback, but all you could do was whine and whine and then whine again.
 "fuck" was now his turn to moan "babygirl you feel so fucking good"
"Javi"
"Yes say my name sweetheart" he thrust into you more harshly now, more deeply even somehow "Scream it"
"Fuck-javi!"
"just like that" he nodded, looking you right in your eyes as he split you in fucking half "Just like that baby"
"Javi I'm-" you whimpered, not able to find the words
"You're coming sweetheart?" he found them for you "You gonna drench me again?" he asked mostly himself "No you need to have it licked to do that, don't you?" he realized "fuck I can't wait 'till you'll let me have a taste again"
"oh my god" you moaned, as pure ecstasy ran through your body "Fuck I'm-"
"come all over me baby" he urged, grunting with every one of his deep fucking thrusts "Be a good girl and come on my cock"
And that was all you needed, that's all you heard before you were screaming his name as loud as you could, letting him drill you into another earth-shattering orgasm.
"fuck" he groaned, just after you were done, "fuck-y/n" was all he could muster before he too, had the best orgasm of his life.
it took a moment before any of you got enough breath in your lungs to do anything but stare into each other's blown-out pupils.
"So?" he asked, not even bothering to pull out
Part of you was still wondering if this was a dream, and the fact you couldn't feel most of your body certainly didn't help
"You know" you rolled your eyes
He smirked "I do know, but I wanna hear you say it"
"Yes, alright?" you admitted
"Yes, what?"
fuck. me.
"Fine" you sighed "Yes, Javier, it was the best sex of my life"
And again, his grin only got wider "Good" he said "'cause it was mine too" he gave your lips another quick peck "and there's no way we're not doing it again"
2K notes · View notes
halsteadlover · 8 months
Text
Haunted
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*Gif not mine credits to the owner*
• Pairing: Jay Halstead x Female!Reader.
• Requested by @lelaartt: So reader and Jay are engaged, her working as a nurse in the ICU. She gets followed by a stranger on her way home for couple of occasions (She doesn't tell anyone) as the stranger becames a main suspect in case that intelligence is dealing with. Jay completelly worried about her safety and she tells him about the stranger following her for couple of weeks.
• Warnings: stalking, cursing, blood, description of violence, brief mention of killing and rape. (Let me know if I missed something).
• Word count: 9530.
• A/N: I know this is a long ass fic and I’m so sorry please don’t come at me 😭. I’m kinda nervous because I really don’t vibe with the fic but I really hope it turned out okay. Let me know what you think and reblog, comment and like if you want. ❤️ thank you again for your support, forever grateful for it. Sending lots of love to you all xx
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Your hospital shift was nothing short of exhausting.
That day there were three hospitalizations in the ICU due to a terrible accident that happened in the afternoon. Three patients, all of them brain dead. The ward was short-staffed and it was just you and another nurse, Amanda, on that shift so dealing with these three new patients, along with the other ones, was really exhausting.
After closing your locker, you removed the necklace where you hung the ring and slipped it onto the ring finger of your left hand, which you did at the end of each shift. You didn't want to risk losing it during work, you’d never forgive yourself for it so you just carried it around your neck during the shifts. You looked at it for a moment with a smile on your lips thinking back to the day Jay asked you to marry him.
You took your cell phone from the pocket of your uniform and, as you walked towards the exit, bag on your shoulders, you noticed various texts from Jay, the last one dating back to a couple of minutes prior.
From Fiancée 💍, 7:17 pm
Baby we're still dealing with a difficult case, I think I'll be late tonight. Please let me know when you get home. I love you endlessly. Be careful.
From Fiancée 💍, 7:55 pm
Baby? Are you okay?
From Fiancée 💍, 8.21 pm
Should I send a patrol to the hospital? You know I'll do it love.
You chuckled not doubting about that, you knew he would. Jay had always been very protective of you, which you wouldn't admit but loved it madly. You loved he cared about you, so much he’d leave everything and everyone to come to you if you asked him to.
From you, 8.27 pm
I'm sorry love, it's been a hard shift and I just picked up my cell phone. I'm going home now. How are you? When will you finish? You’ll come home soon, right?
You left the hospital and started walking home. It was late spring and the temperatures were finally starting to warm up a bit, allowing you to finally breathe fresh air. You really needed it after a whole day of smelling the hospital and disinfectants.
Your cell phone started ringing following a call.
“Hi baby! You really miss me that much, don’t you?” You begin, bringing your cell phone to your ear, a smile on your lips.
“I always miss you, you know that,” your fiancée answered on the other end of the phone. “Are you walking home?”.
“Yes, it's a beautiful evening and I felt like walking.”
Jay sighed. “Baby you know I don't like the idea of you walking alone in the dark, you could’ve taken a taxi or waited for me to pick you up.”
“Oh come on Jay, what’s gonna happen. I'll be home in twenty minutes,” you retorted “Where are you?”.
“I'm still in the district baby, I have to finish writing a case report and then I'm finally leaving,” you heard some noise in the background but you couldn't figure out what he was doing.
Jay continued to keep you company on the phone, refusing to leave you completely alone even though you'd insisted that he finish work so he'd get back to you soon.
You asked him about his day and he started telling you what he had done as you listened to him carefully, asking him a few questions from time to time when you didn't quite understand something. You bumped into a person and quickly mumbled an apology before walking on, quickly glancing at the man who reassured you not to worry.
“Everything okay baby?” Jay asked.
“Yeah, yeah, I got distracted and bumped into a guy, no big deal. What were you saying?”.
Suddenly an unease feeling went through your body. You tried to let it go, thinking it was just a figment of your imagination.
You clasped your hand around your purse, quickly picking up your pace when you began to hear footsteps behind you.
They were so loud you seemed to hear them only a few feet away from you.
You turned around and stopped in your tracks, looking around for a few seconds before letting out a sigh of relief.
There was no one walking behind you.
Your heart was pounding and anxiety was eating up your stomach and you forgot for a moment you were on the phone with Jay.
Stay calm, you're just tired.
“Baby? You still there?” Jay's voice brought you back to reality. “Oh yeah, sorry, I couldn’t hear you anymore.” You answered. You didn't want to make him worry about your simple and stupid feeling, you knew if you told him you had the impression someone was following you he would’ve rushed to you and acted like the world was about to end.
You were sure it was just the fatigue speaking, but your senses remained alert until you got to your apartment. You took a shower while you waited for Jay to come back home, ordering food since you knew neither of you would feel like cooking.
You were about to lower the blinds in your bedroom window when, glancing outside, you noticed a figure standing on the sidewalk in front of you.
It was too dark for you to make out who it was and for a few moments you stood paralyzed, your eyes fixed on that dark figure, trying to figure out if it was just a hallucination.
The noise of the front door opening and closing made you jump in place, nearly giving you a heart attack.
You took your eyes off that figure for just a second.
Just for a moment.
And it was no longer there.
You ran your hands over your face in frustration, letting out a deep sigh at the same time before walking over to Jay, deciding you were going to ignore it and just needed a good night's sleep.
-
The following days went on quietly and the strange episode that happened a few nights before passed into oblivion. But that was before something else weird made your skin crawl.
“Are you sure you don't want me to drive you to work babe?” Jay asked you as he planted numerous kisses on your lips, making you smile between them. It was morning and you were both in the doorway, your arms around his chest as you both struggled to pull away.
“I'm positive baby, just think about resting okay? I’ll see you tonight.”
He cupped his hands over your face, giving you one last long, sweet kiss on your lips. “I'll have dinner ready for you. You be careful. I love you so much.”
“I love you more.“
The day went on peacefully. You had to work a double shift in the hospital as the nurse on the afternoon shift was sick and had to take over her place.
You loved your job, you really did. There was nothing else you would’ve done in your life but sometimes you couldn't deny how difficult and tiring it was.
“Y/N, sweetie!” You heard the voice of your colleague, Becca, calling you from a patient’s room you'd just passed. You sighed, recognizing the tone she used when she needed something.
You took a few steps back, looking into the room and noticing Becca intent on changing the unconscious patient's dressing.
“Becca I was about to leave, why do you still want to torture me?” You whined and she rolled her eyes. “Please help me change these dressings. Pretty please, I can't wait to leave too.”
She put on the sweetest puppy face she was capable of and for the second time you sighed and rolled your eyes. You ended up disinfecting your hands, putting on a pair of gloves and helping her to change the patient’s dressings.
By the time you finished you were dead tired and couldn't wait to get back to Jay and sleep, you probably would’ve just run away if anyone else had asked you any other favor. For this reason, you practically flew out of the hospital after saying goodbye to your colleagues.
It was particularly cold that evening and you found yourself rubbing your hands on your arms in an attempt to get some warmth. Thank God you took the car that day.
You walked over to your car and grabbed the keys from your bag. Before unlocking it, you noticed an object resting on the windshield, held on it by the wiper. You furrowed your eyebrows when you realized it was a rose.
A black rose.
What the fuck?
There was no card attached to it, just the rose.
Your heartbeat began to accelerate and anxiety took over you. You tried to keep calm and not freak out since there was definitely an explanation why someone had to put a damn black rose on your car.
Maybe they were wrong, maybe it was for another person and they got mixed up with the cars.
Who the hell gives a black rose though?
Your eyes scanned the parking lot around you but you didn't notice anyone suspicious or anyone nearby watching you, before dropping the rose on the asphalt, trying not to think about it. There was definitely a mistake.
The car ride was strange.
You couldn't shake the feeling something was wrong. You kept looking in the rear view mirror to notice if there were any cars following you, you were probably just getting paranoid but you couldn't keep yourself calm.
When you parked in your usual spot once you got back home, that feeling of discomfort hadn't disappeared, on the contrary, it had increased.
The streetlights hadn't been turned on yet and it was dark enough outside so distinguishing objects or people was pretty hard.
After locking the car you were about to enter the apartment building when your gaze fell on the sidewalk in front of you.
You didn't know if it was just your imagination, but you swore there was someone standing, exactly in front of you and, despite the darkness, you were sure they were watching you.
You couldn't figure out who that person was, only that he was a man.
Your breath caught in your chest as you realized it was the same figure you'd spotted a few days earlier from your bedroom window.
The silence was almost deafening, making everything more frightening and suggestive.
Your muscles were paralyzed as your eyes seemed to be glued to that man.
Suddenly he moved and your heart almost stopped beating.
But when you saw him go away, that was the last thing you expected.
He did nothing, just walked away.
You tried to explain what was happening in your mind. Maybe it was just a coincidence, that man was there for another reason and you had nothing to do with it.
You let out a sigh you didn't realize you were holding and quickly entered the apartment building, rushing to your home where you found Jay on the couch watching a show.
That rose left you with a feeling of anxiety that you couldn't get rid of easily, also caused by that figure you saw standing in front of you. You didn't immediately tell Jay, you didn't want to worry him since you already knew how he’d react and he’d worry to death and go crazy about it.
You just wanted to be sure that something’s happening before alarming him.
But, knowing you like the back of his hand, he immediately sensed there was something strange, that something was bothering you. You tried to convince him otherwise, that you were just awfully tired after working a double shift at the hospital.
“Baby, really, I'm fine. I'm just dead tired,” you said for the hundredth time since you'd set foot inside the house.
“Are you sure? You know you can talk to me. Did someone upset you? Did something happen at work?” He kept going, thumb and forefinger under your chin to keep your head up and make you look into his eyes. Your hands slid under his shirt, caressing his chest as you placed your lips on his, trying to distract him.
“No baby, nobody did anything. Seriously, nothing happened,” you muttered against his lips, “I just missed my fiancé like hell.” You bit his bottom lip and he hissed, his breathing suddenly heavy. “Do you want to take a shower with me?”.
“Fuck yeah,” Jay had said before crashing his mouth on yours and kissing your breath away. His tongue explored every corner of your mouth as his lips moved masterfully with yours. His hands went down your body and he bent slightly before reaching your thighs, pressing his fingers against your skin and urging you to jump into his arms.
You wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck meanwhile he carried you to the bathroom, never letting go of you. As he kicked the door open, you found yourself completely lost in him, the rest of the world vanishing and all negative thoughts forgotten.
However this sensation of bliss was destined to vanish.
In the following days the feeling that was tormenting you didn’t disappear, instead it only got worse.
You started to sense someone was constantly following you and watching you, that every time you walked in the middle of the street there was someone behind you even if every time you turned around there was no one.
After finding that rose on your car, this kept happening and almost every night for two weeks a rose would appear on your windshield.
Jay knew something was wrong, you weren't acting normally anymore.
You were always jumpy, any sudden noise made you almost have a heart attack, even if you were cooking and he suddenly hugged you from behind you’d be scared to death.
Needless to say Jay asked you a million times what was going on, what was it that was bothering you so much but you didn't want to bother him. You didn't want to upset him, make him worry about some stupid feeling of yours, not when his work was already haunting him enough.
Maybe deep down you were hoping whoever was leaving you those roses would stop and eventually leave you alone.
One evening you went out with your friends, on one of your rare days off, to try to keep your mind occupied and to catch up with them since you didn't always have the opportunity because of your hectic job.
Between laughter, jokes, chatting and various cocktails, the evening went on normally and by 1:00 am each one of you went back home. You headed towards your car, parked not far from the bar where you had all met together, calm and happy for the first time in weeks.
However, this feeling of calmness faded the instant your gaze fell on a damn black rose sitting on your windshield, again.
A wave of anger took over you.
You were tired, so damn tired of this little game that whoever it was was playing against you.
Who the hell was this person? What the fuck did they want from you? Why were they targeting you?
Whoever that person was they following you, they knew what you were doing, who you were with, and it scared the shit out of you as well as infuriating you.
You tore all the petals off that rose that would haunt you forever before throwing it angrily on the asphalt and getting into the car. You started it and quickly drove away from there, intending to go home immediately.
You wanted Jay, you wanted your fiancée. You wanted to hug him, feeling safe again in his arms and forget about all that shit that was going on.
As soon as you got home, however, your heart skipped a beat when you saw Jay laying on the sofa, asleep. The TV was on and he had his cell phone resting on his stomach, holding it close in case you called him. A smile was born on your lips and for an instant all negative thoughts flew away as your attention focused on the sleeping figure on the couch.
You leaned towards him, leaving a sweet little kiss on his forehead, also gently stroking his hair with your left hand. He stirred in his sleep and opened his eyes at the same instant, looking around before looking at you, a sigh of relief to see you were back home safe and sound.
“I’m sorry I woke you up baby,” you whispered, kissing his forehead again “Let's go to bed so you can sleep again.”
He mumbled something you couldn’t catch and rubbed his eyes before flashing a smile that nearly made your knees buckle. He nodded and then stood up, stretching his arms before pulling you into a hug. “How are you my love? Did you have fun?”.
The memory of that rose returned to your mind but for some reason, seeing his eyes so red and tired, you decided not to worry him about it and you’d talk to him about it the following morning.
“Mmh,” you muttered nodding your head “I really had fun, we needed this girls night out even though I missed you a lot.”
He chuckled, placing his hands on your face and giving you a kiss on the lips. “I’m glad darling, you deserved it since you’re working so hard lately. And I missed you so much more,” he kissed you again “Come on, let's go to sleep now.”
But that night you couldn't sleep given the thousands of thoughts that were going through your head. You couldn't help but think who would do something like that, what the hell those roses meant. Was there anyone who had it in for you? Did you do something to someone? Maybe an angry patient?
You thought again and again about who could be doing this but none occurred to you. Jay told you about his cases so many times you knew that whoever did this was doing it to torture you, to keep you on your toes, to make you live in fear.
And the fact they were succeeding was infuriating you.
Fear turned into pure terror when, while checking your cell phone, you noticed a text from an unknown number.
So pretty. Can’t wait to meet you.
How did they get your number?
You were so immersed in your thoughts you didn't notice it was morning and that Jay had woken up in the meantime. He literally jumped out of bed when you told him the time after he asked you, realizing he was late. You had the afternoon shift so you didn't have to worry about getting ready for quite a while longer.
“Baby can I talk to you about something?” You had asked him, not being able to hold it in anymore even though you knew you picked up the worst time to do it.
How smart were you for wanting to talk to him about something so delicate as he was hurring to get dressed and going to work? Not much.
“Can you tell me about it later? I'm so sorry, but I'm super late…” he replied frantically as he ran from one part of the room to another looking for the keys. He stopped for a moment in front of you, placing his hands on your face, analyzing your features. “Is it something important though? If…”
You shook his head, placing your hands on his chest and giving him a reassuring smile even if anxiety was making you nauseous. “No, it's not urgent baby. I'll tell you tonight. Now go.”
He smiled at you and made sure to leave you a long, sweet kiss on your lips before saying goodbye and literally flying out of the front door.
It could wait, right?
You tried to keep yourself busy all morning, cleaning every corner of your apartment and keeping your mind from the negative thoughts.
You couldn't deny the slightest noise made you jump, even when you accidentally dropped something on the floor. You hated this feeling, you hated having to be afraid in your own home, you hated whoever was doing this to you, you hated them so fucking much.
You nearly jumped for joy when you realized it was time to get ready for work, the thought that for few hours you'd be safe made you especially happy to go to the hospital.
You took a shower before quickly putting on your uniform and packing your bag. You checked that everything you needed was there, house and car keys and hospital locker keys, a bottle of water, tissues, tampons, some snacks, pepper spray and a small knife. Jay had forced you to carry them around constantly, asserting you could never be too safe and he’d be comfortable with the thought you had something to protect you in case of need, and never as then as then you were grateful to him.
Once you left the apartment, you made sure you locked the door at least three times. The anxiety that had been living with you for weeks was now gripping your stomach, forcing you to constantly look around and keeping you alert to any individual passing by you.
You forcefully clutched your purse to you, walking briskly to your car and unlocking before climbing in and locking yourself inside. You let out a breath you didn't realize you were even holding as your eyes continued to scan the perimeter for any type of threat.
Did you already mention how much you hated this?
“It's okay Y/N, it's okay, just take it easy,” you whispered to yourself, taking a deep breath before putting on your seat belt and starting the car.
As you drove to the hospital you couldn't help but constantly look at the rear view mirror, almost as if you expected someone to be following you but they weren't, there was no car that you repeatedly noticed behind you.
Your cell phone started ringing and you took it from inside your bag, not taking your eyes off the road. Without even looking who it was, imagining for a moment it was Jay, you answered.
“Hello?”.
The smile on your lips instantly disappeared when instead of a voice you started to hear a heavy sigh, almost a pant.
“Hello?”.
You took the phone away from your ear and glanced at the screen, noting that it wasn't Jay, or anyone else you knew, but an unknown ID.
“Who is this?” You continued, hoping whoever it was would answer and maybe you'd recognize the voice. The person on the other end of the phone just kept sighing heavily, making your heart beat so hard you thought you were about to have a heart attack at any moment.
“What the fuck do you want from me?! Leave me alone!” You screamed, in the grip of fear, anxiety and anger that this person was forcing you to suffer. You closed the call and threw the cell phone on the passenger seat, not caring if it had bumped into something or was broken.
Your vision began to blur with tears fearing for your safety. They had your number. They knew where you lived. What kept them from taking you and killing you?
Your hands were shaking on the wheel as you parked at the hospital, palms sweaty. Your heart was still pounding and there wasn't a muscle in your body that didn't shake like your hands.
You took a few minutes to compose yourself, not wanting to cause questions from colleagues about the reason of your emotional state.
You took a few deep breaths and wiped your tears away, constantly telling yourself that everything was fine, that you'd be fine, that no one could hurt you in the hospital.
You never felt the need to have Jay with you like then. God you were stupid, so fucking stupid for not telling him about all of this before, for keeping everything inside you and hoping it’d eventually just go away, for underestimating what was happening. You were being stalked.
You texted him, telling him you'd arrived at the hospital and asking how his day was going, determined to tell him about the person who was stalking you as soon as you got off work.
You never thought you'd say it but you were never as glad you had a hard shift as you were that afternoon. Four patients arrived, one after suffering a stroke, two from a car accident and another after falling from the roof of his house.
The entire shift consisted of you and your colleagues running back and forth across the ward, treating patients, resuscitating them after one of them went into cardiac arrest twice. Your mind was focused on nothing but your patients and in treating them, everything else was left out of the hospital. You wouldn't let whoever was stalking you ruin your job, ever.
At the end of the shift there was no need to say you were dead tired and couldn't wait to go to sleep and although it was only 8:00 pm, the lack of sleep of the night before starting to take a toll on you.
As you placed your stethoscope in the locker and grabbed your bag, you removed your engagement ring from the chain around your neck and putted it on your finger. Your cell phone rang following a text notification and your heart skipped a beat for an instant.
The anxiety, which you managed to not to think about during the afternoon, returned stronger than ever to grip your stomach and for a moment you considered to throw the phone away.
But you thought it’d Jay and when you realized that it was indeed him, you breathed a sigh of relief. He said he'd be late that night because of a particularly difficult case and to let him know when you'd be done and went back home.
You tried to hide your sorrow, not wanting to be alone, especially in that situation.
You quickly typed a text back, asking him what he’d like for dinner, and put your cell phone in your bag. You said goodbye to your colleagues and walked towards the hospital exit.
You took a deep breath, praying to God to go home safe and sound.
Although spring had arrived it was particularly cold that evening due to the wind blowing and you cursed yourself for not bringing a jacket with you.
You walked, actually, almost ran to your car.
Anxiety was eating you alive and your heart was pounding, fear flowing like a river through your veins.
After taking the keys from your bag and unlocked the car, you quickly looked around, a sigh of relief leaving your lips when you saw no one was around you.
But suddenly the keys fell out of your hands as a slimy hand placed over your mouth and an arm around your hips.
Your bag fell to the ground as you began to squirm in an attempt to free yourself from whoever grabbed you.
Adrenaline coursed through your veins as the fear of dying made you fight like never before.
You screamed, your throat burning, even though because of the hand your scream came out muffled.
“Stop fighting it, it had to happen sooner or later, you knew it was going to happen sweetie,” A man's voice came hoarsely to your ears and you suppressed a gag.
You managed to hit his side with your elbow, hard enough to loosen his grip on you and you tried to push him away with all the strength you had in your body.
“You fucking whore!”.
You threw yourself to get the car keys on the asphalt but the man was faster than you and grabbed your arm, pressing his fingers into your skin with such force you were sure they’d leave a mark.
A searing, stinging pain radiated up your face as his fist hit you full-on, knocking you to the ground. You put your hands forward to try to cushion the fall, but it caused you scratches and minor lacerations on both your forearms.
“We're meant to be. I know you want it. I saw it.”
You glanced at him and almost fainted when after few seconds your recognized him.
You had already met him. He was the guy you bumped into two weeks ago.
What the fuck?!
He tried to grab your wrists but before forcing you to get up, you managed to kick him in his genital area, using all the strength you had in your body. A sound of pure pain escaped his mouth and he backed away, leaning forward and gripping the sore area with his hands.
You took advantage of that moment of weakness to get off the asphalt. You weren't going to let him hurt you, not anymore.
You grabbed his black hair in two fists and you didn't care about the damage you would’ve caused him, you didn't care you were a nurse, that you were supposed to be the one to treat people and not hurt them, but you kneed him in his face and the horrible noise his bones made, suggested you most likely broke his nose.
You pushed him to the ground, ignoring the way he grunted in pain and the blood pouring profusely from his nose, kicking him in the stomach with such force that even you were stunned.
You never fought in your entire life, never kicked anyone or punched someone, you hated the idea of hurting people but at that very moment your life was on the line and you had to protect yourself.
The man was laying on the asphalt grunting and muttering some curse word and you took advantage of it. You had to run away, that was your only chance.
You quickly grabbed your car keys and purse off the ground before opening the door and getting in. You locked yourself in before you started fumbling to get the vehicle going.
Your hands were shaking and your vision was still blurry from the punch he had thrown at you.
You gave him a quick look, terrified he’d get up and kill you on the spot.
You didn't know how but you managed to start the car and without even looking back you drove away from that parking lot. You knew you couldn't drive in those conditions but you just wanted to get away from that monster.
You didn't know where to go, you didn't want to go home, the terror of being attacked there would’ve killed you so you went to the place where there was the only person you wanted to see, the only one who could make you feel better, safe.
The journey to the district was awful.
Your body was driving but it was as if you were experiencing everything from the outside, as if your soul had left your body and was looking at you from afar.
You didn't know how you managed to drive and not run over anyone or crash yourself.
Your breathing was still quickening, your chest rose and fell as if you'd run a marathon, your trembling hands struggling to hold onto the steering wheel. Your vision was blurred due to copious tears flowing from your eyes and streaming down your face, not even realizing you were crying desperately.
Your face was in pain and you were sure a huge bruise would appear on your cheek, although you didn't care, grateful you were still alive, that you managed to escape.
When you arrived at the district, you didn’t care about parking your car properly, or to take your bag or lock it after getting off. You just wanted Jay.
A smile appeared on Sergeant Platt's face the moment she saw you walking up the stairs, but when she noticed the way you were running, it immediately disappeared.
“Oh my God Y/N!” she exclaimed as soon as she saw you up close. Your face was streaked with tears, an expression of pure terror and fear contouring your features, your uniform stained with dust. She ran towards you, placing her hands on your arms. “What happened to you?” She took a look at your body looking for any other injury. “Oh dear. It's okay, whatever happened you're safe here.”
You kept breathing hard and your eyes were so full of tears you could barely see her.
“Shh it's okay. Come on, let's go sit down.”
She put her arm around your shoulders as she took your hand with her free one as a sign of support. She led you into one of the break rooms, making you sit on the couch and sitting next to you.
Her hand kept squeezing yours meanwhile the other stroked your back, trying to calm you down.
“Do you want some water?” She asked and you nodded, not being able to speak at the moment. Trudy got up and ran to get a bottle of water.
She handed it to you after opening the cap and it broke her heart to see the way you were shaking. “T-thanks,” you stammered, your chest shaking with sobs. “J-Jay.”
“I'm going to call him right away, don't move from here,” she said, seeing the way you needed him. She got up and ran upstairs, where Intelligence was still busy working on the case.
Everyone turned to the sergeant, who was at the top of the stairs with an expression that did not bode well. “Trudy, did something happen?” Voight asked as soon as he saw her but her gaze fell on Jay, who was standing by the whiteboard, arms folded across his chest.
“Jay… It's Y/N…” She spoke, saying nothing else. “She's downstairs now…”
Jay's eyes widened at the sergeant's words, his eyebrows furrowed in an expression of worry and fear. He knew something was up, by the way Platt looked at him and a wave of anxiety hit him, his mind now focused only on you.
Without even letting her finish the sentence, he quickly moved away from the others, running down the stairs, almost tripping on his feet. Trudy followed him, giving no explanation to the rest of the team who just exchanged a worried look.
“Where's she?” he asked hurriedly and Trudy pointed him to the room you were in.
He burst into the room and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw you sitting on the sofa but immediately worrying when he saw the state you were in. Trudy closed the door behind him, leaving you two alone and not giving any other cops a chance to snoop.
You had your elbows resting on your knees, your hands on your face as your leg bounced up and down almost obsessively.
“Baby!”.
His voice made you snap your head to him and before you knew it, you were rushing into his arms, squeezing yours around his torso with so much force you were almost afraid he’d disappear.
Jay was surprised for a moment but immediately returned that hug, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and hugging you like he never did. He had no idea what had happened, but whatever it was he knew it was serious and that was enough to make his heart race.
“I'm here baby, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. It's okay,” he whispered, placing a kiss on your head, stroking your hair. You cried in his arms, with relief because he was finally there with you.
His heart sank as he heard you cry like that, feeling helpless like never before. You kept shaking and, without even knowing anything, Jay promised himself whoever had done this to you was a dead person.
“Baby you're making me worry to death. Please talk to me,” his voice coming out desperately. You broke away from his embrace, but still remained very close to him. “Darling, look at me. What happened?”.
His hands rested on your face and inevitably on the bruised cheek. You winched in pain and this didn't escape Jay, who was on the verge of losing his mind by then. “Y/N. Look at me,” he urged and you did as he said, lifting your head and making eye contact with him.
His breath caught in his chest as his gaze fell on the clear purple bruise on your cheek.
“What the fuck? Y/N…” he stammered, an incredulous and horrified look on his face as he looked at you. He took his hand away from your wounded cheek, placing two fingers under your chin and turning your head to inspect it better. “Shit baby… What happened? Who did this to you?”.
His heart was pounding in his chest and as his eyes looked at every single inch of that bruise that lined your cheek, every single cell in his body lit up with rage. Seeing the desperation on your face, the look of pure terror with which you were looking at him, the way your eyes were so full of tears, Jay felt as if he had stabbed and someone had twisted the knife over and over again.
“I-I… H-he…” you stammered meaninglessly, sobbing between words clearly still unable to speak.
“Oh baby come here,” he hugged you again, this time even harder than he had before. “My beautiful princess. It's okay, it's okay, you're safe now do you hear me? You're safe.” He tried to comfort you “I'm here now, I'm here. You’re not alone anymore and I will never let anyone hurt you again. You’re safe with me my love.”
“I-I was…” another sob “So… S-so scared…” you cried into his shirt, wetting it with your tears.
“I know, my baby, I know,” he whispered, placing lots of little kisses on your head. “I'm so sorry. It wasn't supposed to happen, not to you. But you're safe now, I'm here with you, you’re safe with me.” He kept repeating to you.
You both sat on the couch and he continued to hug you indefinitely, holding you and cradling you in his arms until you calmed down. “Sorry,” you muttered, your voice weak as you pulled away from his embrace, gesturing at his tear-stained t-shirt.
“Don’t even say it,” he replied. He raised his hand and stroked your hair, tucking it behind your ears as you kept your gaze on your hands. He was about to continue speaking when his eyes fell on the bruises on your arm, visible outside of your uniform.
His fingers lifted the sleeve to take a better look of the bruises on your skin. He immediately understood they were finger markers, a sign that someone had violently grabbed your arm.
“Oh darling,” he whispered, shattered at the sight of those horrible marks on your beautiful skin “What have they done to you?” His fingers caressed you gently, being careful not to hurt you further.
He was furious, like he had been a few other times in his life, and he still hadn't heard the story.
“Tell me what happened, please.”
You sighed and with still trembling voice, started talking. You told him about everything, about the roses, about the feeling of being followed, about the text, about the call and about the man who attacked you, the fact you already saw him for few seconds weeks prior, how he hit you and how you defended yourself.
“Why the hell didn't you tell me about it sooner?!” Jay snapped, when you finished speaking “This was never going to happen dammit! I would’ve killed that fucking son of a bitch.”
He leapt to his feet, running his hands over his face and pacing around the room. He didn't want to pick on you, it wasn't your fault and he knew it, but he was so damn angry, so angry you had to go through this, that he wasn't there to protect you.
His eyes landed on you noticing how yours quickly filled with tears again at his words and the tone of voice he used. “No, no, no baby, don't cry,” he rushed over to you, kneeling in front of you and wiping away the tears with his thumbs. “I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to blame you. It's not your fault, please don't cry.”
His hands rested on your knees as you looked at him with sad, broken eyes, making his heart break over and over again. “You’re right I should have told you about it…”
“No, baby, don't get this into your head okay? It's not your fault, I’m so sorry for snapping like that I’m just so fucking furious for what that piece of shit did to you. It’s his fault, he hurt you and make you go through all of this. I hate you had to go through this alone and I wasn’t there to help you,” He sighed “I knew something wasn't right, I should have…” Jay stopped his eyes suddenly widening as you looked at him confused.
“Oh my god, that's… That's what you wanted to tell me this morning, isn't it?”. You didn't answer, effectively giving him the answer he needed.
Jay scrambled to his feet again, as if he'd just been given an electric shock. “Fuck!” He tried to keep control but you jumped as he kicked a chair in anger before placing his hands on the table and bowing his head, his back towards you.
“Jay…” you mumbled, standing up and walking towards him. You placed a hand on his back even though he didn't move from that position.
“It's my fault, this…” he choked on his own words “If I had stopped and listened to you this morning… Shit… It shouldn't have happened… I’m so sorry…”
“Hey, hey, no baby,” you interrupted him “Don't be hypocritical and tell me to not blame me and then do the same.”
He turned his head to you and it broke your heart to see his eyes full of tears. “I was late Y/N… I… This happened to you because I didn't stop for five fucking minutes to listen to you!”.
“Jay, listen to me,” you spoke to him softly. You lightly pulled his arm, causing him to straighten his back. You cupped your hands over his face, stroking his cheeks. “It's that crazy bastard's fault okay? Not yours, not mine.”
“If something happened to you… God…”
“No. Let's not do this. No ifs and buts. I'm here and I'm fine, I was scared shitless, I'm still scared shitless, but I'll be fine. You’re here with me and you’re all I need baby. These are just bruises and they'll be gone in a couple days,” you croaked “You should’ve seen how he looked then.”
He sighed before letting out a chuckle though the tears, hugging you for the third time, his hand stroking your hair. “We'll get him okay? And I'll fucking make him pay for what he did to you.”
You and Jay went upstairs, not wanting to let you disappear from his sight for even a second, after reassuring Trudy and telling her what had happened. Needless to say, she threatened to kill the bastard herself if Jay didn't. The way he answered told you that there was no need and that he’d certainly sort it out.
“I'll get you some ice for the bruise,” Kim had offered. The rest of the team didn't take it quite well either and Voight promised you they’d catch the bastard who hurt you. You and Jay had been together for a long time and you were part of the group now, an attack on one of them was an attack on all of them.
“Thank you,” you thanked her with a warm smile, placing the bag of ice on your face. The cold sent a rush of shivers up your spine.
“Come on baby, let's go in the break room,” Jay had said, his hand resting on your lower back. However, your gaze fell on the white board on which various photos and sentences were hung.
At first you didn't notice, but when your eyes saw a particular photo, you did a double take, stopping in your tracks and lowering the hand that was holding the ice.
“Baby? Are you okay?” Jay immediately asked alarmed, then following the direction of your gaze. “Oh. That's the case we're investigating.”
The photo just on the blackboard wasn't clear enough, it was a frame taken from a surveillance video but you could distinguish the features of the man it portrayed.
You stopped breathing for a second and your mind retraced in those brief moments your aggression, still fresh and imprinted in your memory.
“Y/N?” Jay pressed, worried about your reaction as his hand caressed your back.
“It-it… Jay…” you breathed out “It's him…”
“What?!” Jay's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets and everyone in the unit couldn't mask their surprise.
“It was him… H-he attacked me… Oh god…”
Your hands start shaking again and you thanked that Jay was there to hold you or you would’ve probably collapsed on the floor.
Your eyes moved from that frame to the other hanging photos. There were four photos depicting four different women, more or less your age and similar in appearance to yours. Alongside these were other photos portraying instead what were unmistakably the victims’ bodies.
You were in complete shock.
What were the odds that the man stalking you was the same Jay was investigating on?
“C’mon let’s go,” Jay put his arm around your shoulders, leading you to the break room and closing the door behind him.
You weren't even crying. You were just completely shocked.
“Jay… He…” you stammered as if you were having trouble coordinating your thoughts. He put both of his hands on your shoulders.
“Baby, just breathe okay? Do it with me, take a deep breath.”
You shook yourself out of his grip, now in a panic. How could you calm down?
“He was… He would’ve killed me Jay, like… Like those women… Holy shit…” you continued to babble. You couldn't believe it. You understood that bastard was to be locked up somewhere, but you never, ever imagined he was a serial killer, that he’d done that before to those poor women. What if you didn't fight? What if he managed to overpower you?
Jay closed his hands into a fist, pressing his nails into his palms in an attempt to let out even a tiny bit of the anger, rage and fear he was feeling at the moment.
He didn't even want to imagine it, the thought was enough to make him sick. He didn't want to imagine what could happen to you. He run the risk of losing you forever without even realizing it.
Jay couldn't exist in a world where you weren't there. He couldn't even pass the idea of not having you next to him, the pain from this thought alone was unbearable and it was enough to make his heart shatter to pieces. Damn it, he asked you to marry him, you were his fiancée, his soon to be wife, the future mother of his children. You had to start a family together, buy a bigger house to raise your children and you’d live and grow old together, forever.
He couldn't accept some son of a bitch threatened to take you away from him, the most beautiful person he'd ever met, the love of his life, his anchor and his salvation.
“What happened to those women?” You asked, afraid to hear the answer.
“Baby…”
“No Jay, please, just… Just tell me. What happened to them?”.
Jay took a deep breath, knowing that telling you would only make you feel worse. “No, love. Listen to me now,” he walked over to you, placing a hand on your healthy cheek and stroking your skin with his thumb. “Don't torture yourself like this, it won't do you any good to know, please trust me. You were so brave and you managed to knock out that son of a bitch and now you're here with me, safe, so just think about this okay? I beg you. I don't even want to think about what happened to those poor women, I don't want to think something like that could’ve happened to you and I don't want you to think about it either.”
He was right. You didn't want to know, sometimes it was better to live in the unknown.
“I'm so proud of you,” he whispered, kissing your forehead as his fingers wiped away your tears with excruciating delicacy. “I would’ve died if anything had happened to you baby, I love you so, so fucking much. I couldn't have survived without you.”
“I love you so much Jay,” you too replied in a whisper before sharing a soft, sweet kiss, your nerves starting to finally calm down. “What happens now?”.
“You’ll stay here and we’ll continue to work non-stop until we catch that bastard.”
“Are you sure I can stay here?”.
“Is this even a question?” He looked at you as if you were an alien “Yes baby, of course you can. You have stay here. I need to know you're safe or I won't be able to think of anything else and I know nothing can happen to you if you’re here. If you need anything call me and I’ll be here okay? Try to get some rest, and put ice on your cheek.”
You nodded, knowing that even you wouldn't feel safe anywhere else but there in the district.
After sitting on the small sofa in the break room you eventually fell asleep, tired and worn out from the shift, the day's events and the lack of sleep from the previous night.
Jay and the rest of the team worked nonstop to try and locate the suspect whose name was still unknown. After learning you had hit his nose and you had probably broken it, they called the hospitals in the area and within a radius of about 20km – deducing he wouldn’t be so stupid to go to the hospital where you worked – with the hope that he’d go to get treated.
This hope turned out to be a reality when Kevin was told by a hospital just outside the city that there was a patient matching the description who was still there waiting to be treated for his broken nose.
When Jay went into the break room to warn you they'd found a lead, his heart skipping a beat seeing you asleep. Your head was resting on the back of the couch, your arms folded across your abdomen as your chest slowly rose and fell.
A sad smile spread across his face as he approached you with silent steps, his chest tightening at the sight of that horrible bruise on your cheek. As his eyes roamed on your body, he then noticed some scratches on your forearms and his stomach dropped again for the thousand time that night. He’d never forgive himself for not being able to help you, for failing to realize sooner what was happening, allowing someone to hurt you, he was hating himself for not being there to protect you.
He decided not to wake you up and he leaned over you, gently stroking your hair and tucking a strand behind your ear that had fallen in front of your face. He kissed your forehead, taking an extra second to savor the moment, grateful to still being able to do it.
“I love you so much my baby,” he whispered, “Everything will be okay, I promise you.”
After telling Trudy to stay by your side and never leave you alone, he headed towards the hospital where the suspect was supposed to be, his blood boiling with anger, his hands shaking with the frenzy of being able to have that son in his hands.
The stalker, however, after seeing the cops coming, didn't hesitate for a second to run away. Jay chased after him, determined not to let him get away.
“Chicago PD! Stop now!” Jay shouted as he quickly descended the emergency stairs and followed the man, skipping a few steps at a time in an attempt to reach him first. The fact the man was injured went to his advantage as Jay took the opportunity to jump on his back, causing both of them to fall heavily to the ground.
Jay's vision immediately blurred with anger.
He punched him in the face, using all the strength he had in his body to hurt him. “Son of a bitch!” He exclaimed through clenched teeth, punching him again and again. He didn't care about anything, he didn't care about the consequences there could be. He just wanted to see him suffer, to see him writhe in pain and fear, just the way you did.
“You made a fucking mistake tonight,” Jay spat, standing up and grabbing him by the collar of his shirt, lifting him up like a sack of potatoes before slamming him heavily against the wall. The man coughed, letting out sounds of pain even if Jay couldn't care less. “You'll wish you’d never met her when I'm done with you, you worthless piece of shit.”
He hit him in the face with another punch, not caring about the blood splattered on him after each blow.
He didn't even realize he wasn't alone anymore. Voight was there and watched the scene without batting an eyelid. He deserved it, he deserved everything Jay would do to him, not just for you but also for those poor women who weren’t lucky enough to survive. He knew there was no way to stop him, even if he wanted to, especially since you were involved.
Jay hit the man's head against the wall, then pushing him to the ground. He approached him and without any mercy and without even acknowledging the man's suffering, he kicked him in the stomach.
“Fuck…” the man murmured weakly.
“Look at me you son of a bitch!” Jay cursed, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt again and punching him in the face. “You thought it was fucking fun to hurt my fiancée?!”.
Another strong punch.
“Answer me!” He shouted, knowing he’d not receive a response.
Jay had completely lost control.
His mind was only picturing your wounded and tear-stained face, your terrified expression, your eyes full of tears, the bruises on your arm, on your face, the scratches, the way you hugged him so tightly because of the terror you felt, the fear you must have felt in those weeks.
“You thought you’d get away with it huh?! Making my future wife's life a fucking hell?!” He growled again, kicking this time the man’s face. “Making her scared of her own fucking shadow?!”.
Another kick in the stomach.
He was about to kill him and he didn’t give a fuck.
He bent over the man who was then barely breathing. “Did you like putting your useless dirty hands on my girl, huh?” he hissed as his foot stepped on one of the man’s hand with so much force until he heard his screams and his bones cracking.
He didn't move anymore, now unconscious and covered in his own blood.
Voight intervened at that point, not even knowing if he was alive or not. “That's okay Jay, calm down now.” He placed his hands on his shoulders, pulling him away from the unconscious man. Jay was breathing heavily, as if he had just run a marathon, his angry eyes still focused on the bastard lying on the ground.
“Now get away from here. Go out from the emergency exit and drive back to your fiancée, you were always there with her okay? I’m sure she needs you now.” Voight had ordered him but Jay didn't respond at first. “Halstead.”
At that point Jay focused his gaze on his boss and nodded feebly, casting one last glance at the stalker before walking away.
He wiped his face and hands with a handkerchief he had found in the car, trying to ignore the pain in his swelled hand, his knuckles red.
He never regretted what he did.
He had always condemned the brutal ways some cops used, like his own boss did sometimes, but in that moment he didn't stop to think about how he’d not hesitate even a second to do it again and make suffer anyone who’d hurt you.
When it came to you he’d lose his mind, his judgment clouded. You were the most important person in his life, the most precious of treasures, and he’d protect you with his own life if he could, if it meant keep you safe forever. It may have seemed an exaggeration, it may have seemed crazy, but he didn't care, God, he would’ve burn the entire city to the ground if it meant protecting you.
And as he drove to the district, eager to see you again, only one thought ran through his mind: how much he regretted not making that piece of shit suffer more.
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matrixbearer2024 · 3 months
Note
Idea for your "get off my screen" series! So what if the reader is like visiting someone/housesitting for someone and they have a radio that reader is listening to because she loves it, and they (of course) bring their phone and laptop to stay talking to vox, and when they connect him to the TV in the living room and the first thing he sees is the radio and he's like "get that thing the fuck away from you" and the readers like "um, no? I love it. I was thinking about getting one for my room" and he's like "absolutely not"
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Get That Shit Off My Screen!
A/N: Oh this is fucking golden, I absolutely need to write this to displace the absolute angsty unit of an interlude I wrote hahahaha- I'll be finishing the requested interludes before I continue with the story. I ended up posting the continuation so y'all could already get down to brainstorming and scheming on lore ideas XD
A/N: Vox is kind of a pissy little rat here and we just annoy him a bunch more too lololol Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy the story and as always- Happy Reading!
You have seriously got to stop accepting favors from friends.
Because that was how you found yourself walking down the sidewalk on the way to go housesitting.
Just a week ago you'd had to impromptu take care of a little puppy.
And consequently placate a certain jealous TV demon-
And now you were asked to carry another favor as well.
Well, more like that friend practically begged you to accept.
You slightly readjusted the backpack you wore, it wasn't as light as hoped when you left your home.
Which, makes sense all things considered.
After all, it had your devices in there along with the necessities.
If you had to end up bored today you were going to rope in a certain annoying overlord just to avoid it.
Fumbling with the keys a bit, you opened the door to the house and entered before locking it behind you.
A habit you'd grown up with after your parents constantly reminded you to do so.
The home was... pretty big, especially compared to the place you were currently living in.
Tossing your bag onto the living room couch, you explored the rest of the home for a bit before returning.
"Gonna be housesitting today, mind if I connect you to the TV?"
When he simply replied with a thumbs up emoji, you figured he wasn't doing anything and just connected your laptop to the living room television again.
He didn't appear right away though, so you decided to look around the home once more.
It was filled with a lot of old stuff, reminiscent of a time gone by.
Which, kind of makes sense since it was the house of your friend's grandma that you were watching over for the day.
Ooooh- what's this thing?
"Hey doll sorry I'm late, got a bit delayed from a meeting and- GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM THAT!"
You jumped at suddenly hearing Vox's words from the TV, when did he even get here?!
You had half a mind to yell at him for scaring you but you were far too curious about this old boxy object you found.
"Whaaa??? Why? What even is this?"
You asked while messing with the knobs, you doubted it even worked when it randomly started to play a song.
Oh.
OH.
So that's why he was so pissed.
And so you decided to troll with your digital companion as he often did to you.
"Woaaah, I've never seen one of these old radios before-"
"I'm surprised that one still works, it's an obsolete piece of fucking junk!"
Vox didn't really have time to scan the new surroundings when he'd connected to your devices and consequently the TV.
It didn't help either that the first thing he noticed was that you hunched over messing with something.
Only for him to find out moments later that it was a fucking radio.
The same old shit he'd been busy trying to wipe off the face of hell ever since his rival's return.
And the fact you were starting to get interested in it made his blood boil.
You held back a snicker seeing Vox just angrily glare at the old relic as it continued to play tunes.
You were aware of his entire vendetta against Alastor-
Or well, with as much as he'd tell you when he ranted.
But the fact something so simple as just a reminder set him off?
"Well I think it's niche, maybe I should get one of these for my room-"
"NO- zzZzzZsT THE FU- zZzST -CK YO- ZzZZsT -U AREN'T!"
You couldn't hold the laughs back this time, doubling over when Vox started buffering and yelling about how stupid and old the radio was.
He didn't even seem to notice that you were just pulling his leg.
Something this old wouldn't fit into your home, besides-
You had a new Bluetooth speaker with loads better audio quality.
This old thing was just a nice reminder of times long ago.
Times you didn't even live in.
"Finnneeeee, fine fine you pissbaby. I won't get one. Still think it's pretty funky though."
You said as you plopped down on the couch, noticing Vox's face was still glitching and fizzing on the TV screen.
He wasn't even looking at you and instead was glaring off to the side.
Was he that upset about the radio?
Really??
"Dude, you know as much as I do how ancient that stuff is. If I did end up getting one it would be because someone dumped it on me. I like looking at the past but not collecting relics."
Vox still didn't react and you raised an eyebrow.
Silent treatment huh?
Okay, you could play his game.
"Anyway, I was looking up stuff from around the decade you told me you died."
He finally looked back to you with a raised eyebrow.
Bingo.
"And I ended up finding this serial murder case that's still unsolved to this day."
Vox only furrowed his eyebrows, he wasn't in hell for murder.
As far as he was concerned, it was probably because he was a lying and cheating businessman.
As you continued to talk more about the details of the case, it started to paint a more familiar picture.
And as entertaining as it was to watch you discuss with him something interesting you found-
Vox was not fond of you talking about Alastor so avidly.
Geez, if only you'd look that cute talking about him like that.
What-
What?
That was probably the envy talking.
"Doll, I know you were probably trying to cheer me up but I'm kind of certain that's one of Alastor's cases."
"Huh? Why do you say that?"
"The old fuck's a cannibal. I knew for sure it was him when you mentioned the bodies were found cut up like a butchered pig."
At least Vox was talking to you again, even if he still looked more than peeved it was about his rival.
He actually looked more grumpy and pouty in your opinion-
But that was probably because you weren't seeing right.
"Well, why did you end up in hell then? I would've thought you'd be in for something just as horrible to be as powerful as you say you are."
Vox just sighed, he wasn't actually sure what got him dammed for eternity.
But he did a lot of bad things over the course of his life, so it was probably the accumulation of it all that had sent him into the inferno.
"What makes you ask dollface? Curious much?"
You just shrugged, shifting to lie down on the couch and just look up at the antique chandelier hanging above on the ceiling.
"Dunno, I just want to know more about you. I mean, I know enough- but I want to know more."
Vox could feel his screen heating up slightly in his chair.
Why did you have to be so damn cute-
The fact you wanted to know more about him, it made him feel... odd-
Well, a good odd.
He didn't really know what to do with himself.
"I'm not actually sure. I've been a businessman my whole life, probably the worst of the worst when it comes to principles but I haven't directly ever killed anyone if that's what you're guessing."
"Huh, makes me wonder if I'll end up in hell for the stunts I've pulled on other students too."
"The hacking? Or the blackmailing? Because I doubt either of those would actually send you down here."
"Oh come onnnn, I swear at this point I'll actually kill someone so I can guarantee I'd meet you."
You raised an eyebrow at the screen turning pink again.
Pfft, did he seriously get embarrassed by that?
A smile worked onto your face when Vox softly excused himself and disconnected from the TV.
Ha, cute.
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happiest-hotch · 11 months
Note
OMG please write about married!Hotch x reader going to a club tearing it up on the dance floor for a BAU night out, and an older Jack happens to be there maybe with his girlfriend and he’s mortified seeing his parents really getting down?
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i would dance all over this man
Nights out with the BAU have never gotten less fun. Even as team members changed and through the years you and Aaron were away from the team, first in WITSEC then just to take a break. The plan formulated during your months together in hiding had been to wait until Jack was at college before going back to work
Hanging out at the regular bar was a sign nothing had changed in a decade.
After finishing probably the roughest case you've experienced since you rejoined the team, a team night out was needed, so you happily join Penelope in her mission to drag everyone out.
These days, Aaron doesn't need much convincing. He's more casual after WITSEC, and letting loose a little around the team isn't the worst thing in the world. It probably helps that he's not the boss anymore, and your unit chief also isn't opposed to letting her hair down.
He's only a few drinks in when you're able to convince him to come and dance. Maybe there's some using how much he loves you, but he doesn't protest.
It's hot and sweaty on the dance floor, and you're in a less-than-professional amount of clothing, dancing up on your husband like you're 24.
Aaron keeps his hands firmly on your hips, swaying to the music with you, but what's most sinful is his lips against your neck, very visible to everyone else, and the hard-on in his pants which thankfully remains unnoticed by anyone who's not pressed as hard against him as you are.
Penelope leans over to speak to you, or yell, thanks to how loud the bass is. "He's going to pull a muscle if he keeps dancing like that!" She jokes.
You giggle as you let him spin you around so you're face to face. It's gotten much more heated, and there's no doubt you're grinding provocatively against each other.
You hold his strong forearms, leaning up to whisper something downright filthy in his ear, but he talks first. "Jack."
You chuckle, grimacing. "That's not my idea of dirty talk."
"No." He shakes his head before nodding across the room. "Jack's here."
You pull away from your husband quickly, following his glance across the room before you catch his son. "What's Jack doing here?" You ask in shock. It's definitely a compromising position to be caught in with his dad.
"I don't know," Aaron says, taking hold of your hand and pulling you away from the dance floor and towards his son.
You briefly wonder if it's more or less awkward to acknowledge that he's seen you all over each other. Ignoring it might mean you can possibly look Jack in the eyes again at some point in the next ten years.
There's a girl next to him and you guess it's who he had said he was bringing home to meet you and Aaron during summer vacation. Her dress is probably not what she was expecting to be wearing during a round of meet-the-parents.
"That was awful." Jack deadpans, exactly like his father. "Seriously, I'm not sure how I'm going to burn that out of my memory."
"What are you doing here?" Aaron asks, ignoring the comments that you're struggling not to laugh at.
"Thought you guys were still on a case," Jack explains. "I didn't think I'd catch you dry-humping in a club."
You let out a chuckle while Aaron shakes his head. "Don't say that." He scolds weakly.
"I am so sorry you had to meet them like this." Jack turns to the girl next to him and says.
You offer out your hand to shake hers. "I'm Y/n, and I promise we're not always like this."
Aaron shakes her hand as well, introducing himself. "Yeah, usually our son has far better manners and introduces us to people."
"Usually, my parents aren't engaging in foreplay in the club." Jack teases you both.
You know how to get him back, and you click your tongue. "You don't know that."
It makes both boys' eyes widen while Jack's girlfriend laughs slightly, and the tension is loosened.
"Should we not mention this tomorrow?" She offers, speaking more confidently now that she can read the situation as humorous.
"Deal." You agree for both you and Aaron. "We should go."
"Home to sleep." Jack finishes the sentence for you, raising his eyebrows like a parent would do to their child, rather than the other way around.
Aaron does something you don't expect, frowning. "No promises."
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chaosandmarigolds · 1 month
Note
okay it has been the longest time since I've asked for a request but I freaking LOVE THE WAY YOU WRITE!! So I have a Simon riley request. You can really run off with my idea and write it however you want but Ive had an idea in my head about Simon and the reader adopting because reader or Simon can't have kids and I want to know how he'd handle a kid who's probably been thru some stuff to end up in the foster/adopting system.
ANYWAYS ILYSM keep up your amazing work 😍😍
(no cause I actually screamed omg thank you so much for your kind words they truly mean the world to me <333 )
Adoption! Simon Riley Who had zero doubt on that he wanted children with you, even though he was terrified of failing them he wanted to try
Simon Riley! Who took you to all of the doctors appointments and the testing and the trails and never once mentioned how expensive it is
Simon Riley who was probably the only person a bit more crushed than you when the doctor told you both that it wouldn't be possible to have children of your own.
Simon Riley who let the matter go under the radar for a few months before you walk into the bedroom, tablet to chest
"i'm gonna say something and I need you to be open to it."
He blinks a few times as he sets his book down on his lap, "Should I be scared?"
"No. But..." You hold out the tablet, showing him the adoption application you had half filled out, "I mean there's thousands of kids who-who need a family an-and-"
"Finish it up, why don't ya- lemme get the bank statements, yeah?"
Simon Riley! who would rather go back on deployment than have more people walk through his home while making judgments on if it was 'child friendly'
Simon Riley! Who sat up with you every time you were waiting for an update, watching easy going bake shows on the sofa with the laptop email service open on the coffee table in front of you
Simon Riley! Who was a little bit disgusted when the agent sat you both down with the files of children in need, because he did have half a mind to just take them all
"Now I know you both told me you were looking for a baby, and I understand that however the waitlist for that is incredibly long and ultimately it is the mother's choice in that situation," The agent's eyes go to Simon, almost as if to say 'no mother would ever choose that' and she pushes the file to you, "And I always push for the adoption of some of the older kids. There's no pressure."
Your eyes narrow to the folders in front of you and you gulp down, hands shakily going to the folder in front of you and pulling it to your lap, all the while you could tell Simon was just still a little confused by the statement the agent had made before. However, you humored it, flipping through the photos and the tragic backstories that made your eyes water, until you open one that caught your attention, two children sat in the photoinsteadd of one.
Name: Macey-Ann Adams
Age: 11 years
Name: Taylor Kate Adams
Age: 24 months
"Si..." You didn't tell that your voice was muffled by a bit of tears and you hold the file over to your husband, who looked over the pictures, taking you slight interest. So he lightly takes the file and then looks up at the agent.
"These two?" He speaks as softly as he was able to.
The agent looks at the file and then a frown appears on her face, "Macey, she...she's a troubled girl, on her fourth foster home, and she's jumping schools, I would not recommend her."
with a shuttered breath you breath out, "But...but she's just a kid- can...can we meet her and Taylor?"
Simon Riley did extensive research as soon as he got home, finding the articles from the local newspaper on the two girls who were so severely abused by their father that they wouldn't look the police officer in the eye
Simon Riley who was beginning to think it wouldn't be a good idea until they met the girls at the local park
Simon Riley who saw so much of himself in that little girl it made him almost puke
Simon Riley who got over himself when he saw your beaming face as you held Taylor, helping her get the cherry blossom from the tree
Simon Riley who would be lying if he said he wasn't estatic when you were approved for the adoption
Simon Riley who tried to get to know Macey but the girl was quiet, self suffiecnt, she was him
"You're taking Taylor." Macey mutters as she sits on the swing, watching you with her baby sister
Simon squints against the sun and sits down in the swing beside her, and then he looks to you, a smile on his lips for a moment, "Not jus' her."
To that the eleven year old looks at him, a frown on her face, "What? People want babies. Taylor is a baby."
There was a long silence and Simon looked down at his boots, "You like trampolines?"
Macey blinked, "I do."
"Gonna buy you a trampoline for the backyard when the court says it's all over."
Another pause, "You're taking both of us?"
"Figured you'd wanna stay with your lil' sis."
"I-kinda....thanks, Mister Riley."
"Simon. You can call me Simon, or...whatever you wan, and' we gotta get a move on your sister was wan'n a ice cream."
Simon Riley! Who takes careful care in helping Macey unpack
Simon Riley! Who takes the girls shopping every weekend until he thinks they have everything they need
Simon Riley! Who loves his girls more than anything else in the world
( I hope this is good and honestly this is so cute I may write a more in-depth one shot type of thing. Comments and feedback make my day! annnd yeah! that's it <33
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angel-w0nderland · 29 days
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~ 𝖲𝗍𝖾𝗉𝖻𝗋𝗈!𝖲𝖺𝗆 𝖬𝗈𝗇𝗋𝗈𝖾 𝖷 𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 ~
~ 𝖲𝗆𝗎𝗍 ~
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~ Authors Notes - this is my first time writing something but i did have help so please let me know what you like or don't like :) i also don't own any of the gifs used ~
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Sam Monroe, the boy who was your stepbrother for the past four years, shuffled into your bedroom, his eyes darting around the familiar space like a caged animal. He took a seat on the edge of your bed, hands shoved deep into the pockets of his worn jeans, and let out a sigh. You knew why he was here. Your parents were gone for the weekend, leaving the two of you to fend for yourselves. It wasn't the first time they'd left you alone together, but something felt different today. Maybe it was the way he kept glancing in your direction, or the nervous energy that seemed to radiate from him. Or maybe it was the way your heart fluttered just a little bit faster whenever he was near.
"So…what do you wanna do?" he finally asked, his voice barely above a whisper. You knew he was trying to act nonchalant, but you could see the uncertainty in his eyes. You took a deep breath, trying to muster up the courage to say what was on your mind. "Sam?" you began, your voice barely above a whisper. "Can I…talk to you about something?" He looked up at you, his blue eyes meeting yours, and something in the way he was looking at you made your heart skip a beat.
You took another deep breath and blurted out, "I've…I've grown pretty used to having you around. And I…I just wanted to say that…well, I don't want you to think I'm being weird or anything, but…I kind of…like being with you." You felt your cheeks flush as the words left your mouth, but you couldn't take them back now.
Sam's expression slowly changed as you spoke, first surprise, then confusion, then something that looked like…relief. "You…you like being with me?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. "Even when we're just hanging out like this?"
Heat flooded your cheeks as you nodded, unable to meet his gaze. "Yeah…I do. I mean, you're always so…funny and smart. And you're really sweet, too. I just…I never realized how much I enjoyed being around you until now." The words tumbled out of you, unbidden and unfiltered. You felt your heart racing, but you couldn't stop now. You took a deep breath and looked up at him, hoping he understood what you were trying to say.
Sam leaned forward, his expression softening, and cupped your face in his hands. "Really?" he whispered. "You mean that?" You could feel the warmth of his skin against yours, and it sent a shiver down your spine. "Because I feel the same way, you know. I mean, I thought you just…put up with me or something." He paused, searching your eyes for any sign of doubt. "But I'm glad I'm not just some annoying stepbrother to you."
His thumbs traced circles on your cheeks, and you couldn't help but close your eyes, savoring the feeling of his touch. "Sam…" you whispered, your voice trembling. You wanted nothing more than to feel his lips on yours, to taste him and know that he felt the same way you did. But you were afraid to take that step, afraid that it might ruin everything.
He leaned in closer, his lips mere inches from yours, and you could feel the warmth of his breath against your skin. "What is it, he whispered, his voice thick with desire. "Do you want me to…?" Before he could finish his sentence, you felt his lips brush against yours, gentle at first, then more insistent as he deepened the kiss. Your heart raced and your blood sang in your ears, and for a moment, there was nothing else in the world but the two of you and the way your bodies fit together so perfectly.
Sam's hands slid down your back, cupping your bottom, and pulled you closer against him. You moaned into the kiss, feeling the heat between your legs grow as his hips grind against you. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him even closer, as if you could somehow crawl inside him.
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The world around you faded away as you lost yourself in the moment, the only thing that mattered was the taste of his lips and the feel of his skin against yours. It felt like an eternity since your lips had been touched this way, and you didn't want it to end. But as you felt Sam's breath hitch in his throat, you knew he needed air just as much as you did.
He broke the kiss, his chest heaving as he stared down at you with dazed eyes. "God, I've wanted to do that for so long," he murmured, his voice hoarse. You could see the conflict in his eyes, the desire battling with the uncertainty. You reached up and traced his bottom lip with your finger, feeling the softness of his skin beneath your touch.
"It's okay," you whispered, your voice shaking. "I want this, too." You leaned in again, pressing your lips against his in a tender, exploratory kiss. He responded eagerly, his hands moving up to cradle your head as he deepened the kiss. Your tongues danced together, a tentative duet that quickly grew more confident and passionate.
As you kissed, you became aware of the weight of his body against yours, the heat between your legs, and the way your hearts seemed to beat as one. You felt as if you could lose yourself in this moment, surrender to the overwhelming desire that pulsed between you.
With a gasp, Sam broke the kiss, his chest heaving as he stared down at you with a mixture of awe and lust. "I've wanted to do that for so long," he murmured, his voice thick with desire. He trailed his fingers down your cheek, along your jaw, and back up to cup your face in his hands.
You felt dizzy with the intensity of the moment, your heart racing and your body on fire. You reached up, entwining your fingers in his hair, and pulled him down for another kiss, deeper and more passionate than the last. His lips were soft and yielding against yours, and as you kissed, you could feel the hardness of him pressed against your thigh.
Sam moaned into the kiss, his hips moving rhythmically against yours, and you arched your back, pressing your breasts against his chest. Heat pooled low in your abdomen, and you squirmed against him, wanting more. His hands slid down your back, cupping your bottom, and lifted you up, bringing your legs around his hips. You wrapped your arms around his neck, feeling the roughness of his skin against your fingertips.
He kissed you deeply, his tongue dancing with yours, and you could feel the hardness of his erection pressing against your core. The sensation sent a shiver of desire down your spine, and you ground your hips against him, needing the contact. His fingers dug into your skin, holding you close, as if he was afraid you might disappear.
As you kissed, you could feel your body growing more and more alive, every nerve ending tingling with anticipation. The air between you seemed to crackle with energy, and you could feel the weight of his desire pressing down on you. You arched your back, offering yourself up to him, and he took it, his lips moving lower, kissing a trail down your neck and collarbone.
His hands roamed over your skin, possessive and hungry, as if he couldn't quite believe you were real. You moaned into the kiss, feeling the heat building inside you, and you ground your hips against him in time with his movements. You could feel the dampness between your legs, and the ache deep in your core, and it was all you could do not to cry out.
As his lips traveled lower still, kissing and nipping at your breast, you arched your back, offering him deeper access. He groaned into your skin, his body trembling against yours as he took your nipple into his mouth, sucking gently before flicking it with his tongue. You cried out, the pleasure too intense to bear, and your hips bucked against him.
He pulled back, his eyes meeting yours, and you saw the raw desire there, the need for connection. "God, I want you," he breathed, his voice rough with emotion. "I want this so much."
You reached down, unbuttoning his pants, revealing his hardness to the air. You wrapped your hand around him, feeling the heat and the weight of him in your palm. He arched his back, moaning deeply, and you could see the tension in his shoulders as he fought to remain in control. His hips moved of their own accord, grinding against your hand. "Please," he whispered, his voice ragged. "I need you."
You moved closer, guiding his hardness to your entrance. He gasped as you took him inside you, feeling the tightness of your body surrounding him. He let out a shuddering breath, his hips moving instinctively, thrusting deeper. You moaned, arching your back to meet his movements, the sensation of being filled by him almost too much to bear.
His hands gripped your hips, holding you steady as he began to move, his rhythm growing faster and more urgent. You could feel the tension building inside you, the need for release growing more and more intense. You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him closer, wanting to feel him deeper.
The sounds of their bodies colliding filled the room, a symphony of pleasure and desire. He kissed you, his lips soft and demanding against yours, as he thrust harder, faster. You could feel the heat between you, the sweat that dripped from your skin, and you knew there was no turning back now. This was happening, and it was real.
His movements grew more frenzied, his breath coming in ragged gasps as he neared the brink. You could feel the tension building inside him, the impending release that was going to shake him to his core. You wanted to be there with him, to feel it too, to share this moment of connection.
You arched your back, meeting his thrusts with a moan, your fingers digging into his shoulders. The sensation of being so close, of feeling him inside you, was overwhelming. You could feel the heat between your legs, the tightness building inside you, and you knew that release was close, so close.
His pace quickened, his body moving with a desperate urgency. His skin was flushed, his breath ragged as he neared the brink. You could feel the tension in his arms, the power that he was holding back, and you wanted nothing more than to help him let go. You wrapped your legs tighter around his waist, arching your back further, begging for more.
His thrusts became deeper, harder, as if he was trying to reach something just out of reach. His hips slapped against yours, his body moving in perfect rhythm with yours. You moaned his name, feeling the building pressure inside you, the impending release that was going to consume you both.
He let out a guttural cry, his body tensing as he came, his release spilling into you. You could feel the heat of him, the wetness as he emptied himself, and it was the most intense sensation you'd ever felt. Your body tightened around him, your own orgasm washing over you in a wave of pleasure so intense it was almost painful.
You clung to him, your fingernails digging into his shoulders as you rode out the wave of sensation. His breath came in ragged gasps, his body still moving within yours, their movements now slow and tender. The room spun around you, the world reduced to the feel of his skin against yours, the taste of his lips on yours.
He leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead before trailing it down your cheek, across your jaw and to your neck. His touch was gentle, almost reverent, and it sent shivers through your body. "I want to stay like this forever," he murmured, his voice still ragged from exertion. "Just… with you."
You wrapped your arms around him, feeling the warmth of his skin against yours, the strength of his muscles beneath his clothes. You could feel the weight of his chest against yours, and it was a comforting, reassuring sensation. You let out a contented sigh, closing your eyes as you savored the moment.
They continue to lie entwined, the weight of their post-coital contentment pressing down on them. As they drift in and out of sleep, they share dreamlike fragments of memories from their past, discovering new aspects of each other and forging a deeper emotional connection
Their breath mingles, the rise and fall of their chests in perfect harmony.
The room grows brighter as the sun peeks through the curtains, casting a warm golden light across their entwined forms. You could swear that the air in the room feels different, somehow lighter and more alive. It's as if their bodies are inextricably linked, each breath and heartbeat synchronized, as if they share a single existence.
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moonlight-prose · 4 months
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✧ SECRETS HELD IN THE HEART ✧
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a/n: let's pretend that it's still october and i'm still on my shit. cause no way is it january when i'm finishing this. anyways i got stuck in the rut of 'my writing is the worst thing to grace this planet' and managed to drag my horny ass out of it. you can thank me ovulating for this. now onto angsty bradley!
day twenty-seven - strip tease | kinktober 2023
summary: "he would happily let you overtake his entire life; the part of him that longed for connection—for permanency—now called out to you. whispering a soft question against the curve of your heart. all in the hopes that you’d say yes."
word count: 3.8k (we're so back)
pairing: bradley 'rooster' bradshaw x f!reader
warnings: EXPLICIT SO MINORS DNI, angst, the dangers of truth or dare, alcohol consumption, strip tease, p in v sex, bradley is a boob guy, longing between two idiots, very little editing done.
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You lost the bet.
Really it wasn’t your fault that you lost. You simply had gotten distracted the second your eyes locked with his, a crooked smile spread on his lips as you sipped at your chaser. The beer in front of you now clasped tightly in your hand while you waited for the alcohol to turn you warm. The condensation turned your skin cold as he reached for your hand. You could see the way the hair on his forearm stood up slightly, a chill no doubt raking its way through his body.
The rules with him were simple. Down four shots before the person beside you and you get to be in command for the rest of the night.
You wanted to say that it was some sort of ploy to push you two together when Hangman shoved Rooster forward. Fanboy accidentally bumped into you until your waist was pressed to the edge of the bartop and you were staring down apprehensively at the clear liquid.
Tequila was your strong suit. That much you were sure of. You just hadn’t expected him to fucking cheat.
Brown eyes slid down the length of your body as he tipped his head back to down the third shot, and that was it. You were utterly distracted as a rush of warmth slipped down your spine, curling at the base until you could feel it in the tips of your fingers. You were quickly reaching for your last shot once you were snapped back into reality, only to hear him slam the small glass down beside you.
The raucous cheers of everyone around you confirmed what you already knew. That you were now staring head on at the winner of the bet—your fate now clutched tightly in his hands. While Hangman made a show of pulling Rooster’s arm up as if he’d just won a WWE championship, his eyes were fixed on you. A smile formed on his lips, and you could practically see something churning in the back of his mind.
He had plans for you.
“Better luck next time Fox!”
You grumbled under your breath, drinking your beer until you could no longer fathom the taste anymore. Meanwhile Rooster acted exactly like his name. Proudly puffing up his chest with a grin that would normally have you shambles.
You glared at him instead.
Unable to catch the sight of him being caught off guard, you maneuvered your way through the crowd and headed straight for the back booth. At least there you felt safe. There you could wait out the crowd of testosterone that nearly choked the very breath from your lungs. There Rooster would find you two beers in, humming along to the Eagles, and fully intent on complying with his every word.
Or at least that’s what he believed.
He slipped in beside you with ease, arm propped up around your shoulders, lips by your ear. “Rules are rules Fox.”
Turning slightly, you angled your face close to his—eyes focusing on the plush bottom lip he currently had trapped between his teeth. Fuck, you wanted to take it in your mouth. Taste the remnants of the tequila that still permeated his tongue. You wanted to make him breathless in the way he did to you—holding permanently onto his lungs so tight he feared he may never breathe again.
“They’re stupid rules.”
He chuckled. “No one said Hangman was smart.”
Try as you might, you couldn’t stop the smile from forming on your lips. The jab at Hangman caused the both of you to fall back into your familiar friendship. Something you held so near and dear to your heart. Rooster had always been someone you turned to when things got tough; the one person who could see right down to your soul, as if you were made of nothing but transparent glass.
“So…Rooster.” You shifted, eyes catching his in the soft light of the lamp above. “What’s your plan?”
“Who said I had a plan?”
“Don’t bullshit me.” With a soft tug on his shirt you brought his lips closer, until the warmth of his breath washed across your cheek. “I invented that game.”
He smiled—eyes alight and eager. “Do you want to go back to my place?”
“So you do have a plan.”
A small shrug of his shoulder told you enough to understand that Rooster had been thinking about this far longer than you originally thought. He wasn’t planning on a whim that this would happen eventually. He was hoping that you would lose. If only to move along this unbearable ache that neither of you—try as you might—could put a name to.
“Yes,” you said with a sly grin. “I’ll hold up my end of the deal.”
There it was again. That all too familiar flicker of want he battled with whenever you were near. The small feeling that threatened to swallow him whole if he wasn’t careful. But that was the thing…he didn’t want to be careful. He would happily let you overtake his entire life; the part of him that longed for connection—for permanency—now called out to you.
Whispering a soft question against the curve of your heart. All in the hopes that you’d say yes.
You followed him out of the bar to the boisterous calls of the team across the bar. Each of them chanted Rooster’s name as if he was some sort of hero to them. But the both of you knew that he hadn’t won your affection tonight. He simply lucked out in being the only guy on this side of Fightertown that you actually wanted.
His car sat near the door, parked at an angle that told you he simply swerved in and stopped. Even you had to admit that was unlike him. A measured man who held onto his actions with a tight leash, but he couldn’t say the same was done for his emotions. He was intense in a way that made your heart burn, your insides screaming at you to give into him.
To stop playing this game of fucking chicken.
You flipped through the radio stations as he drove, the rumble of the engine a soothing echo in the background of that irritable humming beneath your skin. As if you would vibrate right out of your skin if he looked at you one more time. All big brown eyes and pouty lips and a heart that would break you if you weren’t careful.
“Truth or dare Rooster.”
He clearly didn’t expect that to come out of your mouth. But as always, his lips curved into that smirk you longed to kiss off his face.
“Truth,” he said, shifting in his seat. You couldn’t see it, but he’d been sporting a hard on since you looked at him that way in the booth.
You snorted. “Of course.”
“D’you want me to pick dare?”
“No.” You smiled, leaning into the seat. “I just figured you would pick truth. It’s the safe answer.”
“I disagree.”
“Oh?”
He chanced a look at you and wished he hadn’t. Your legs were spread slightly, head lolling to the side with a grin on your face that taunted him to look. To see you like this—waiting for him to fuck you seven ways to Sunday. He subtly pressed his foot harder on the gas.
“Truth makes you expose a part of yourself. Dare lets you escape that.”
Without knowing Rooster had hit a piece of yourself that made you sit up a bit straighter. You wanted to push it back down. Conceal it from any prying eyes that might want to pull it closer—inspect what it was. Except he’d already latched onto it and proceeded to yank it out of you with intent.
As if to say I’m here. I’ll be here until you say otherwise.
And you couldn’t deny that it terrified you.
“Alright philosopher Bradley,” you teased in an effort to save face. He chuckled and let you move on. “Tell me a secret you’ve never told me before.”
He stiffened, fingers clutching at the wheel just a bit harder.
“Are you sure you want that?”
“Wouldn’t ask if I didn’t,” you replied, fingers picking at your denim jeans.
“Alright.” He sucked in a breath, shifting in his seat as if he was ready to jump out of the moving car. You wouldn’t be surprised if he did. That’s where Bradley and you were exactly the fucking same.
You hated talking about your emotions.
He coughed, eyes flicking back to you briefly. Thankfully it was too dark for you to see the red stain spread along his cheeks—the heat of your stare burning a hole in the side of his head.
“I—uh—I think I’m in love with you.”
For a moment you remained silent, your heart seizing in your chest and mind going a mile a minute. Words would have been good at this time. A small indication that you in fact felt the same. But he stopped your entire being with that truth—blowing a hole in your impenetrable wall, only to watch as you bled out on the awful leather of his car.
“Fox?”
You jolted, snapping to attention. “What do you mean you think?” He stuttered, mouth falling open. “Don’t you know?”
“I—”
“I know. Why don’t you?”
He had stopped the car five minutes ago in front of his small bungalow. The steady hum of the engine gave way to the awkward tension that now choked the life out of you. Bradley’s eyes locked with yours, darkening slightly at the quick rise and fall of your chest. How you kept your resistant stance even as he tried to pour his emotions out for you.
“What do you mean you know?”
And that was the thing about Bradley fucking Bradshaw. You never knew when he was going to catch you off guard.
For a moment you were in midair, floundering for words to say. But he was way ahead of you.
Popping open his door, he got out of the car and rounded to your side, opening it with a swift motion and helping you out with another. His arm looped around your waist, pulling you up the steps with him, his lips dangerously close to your neck. He didn’t need words for this part, neither of you did.
You’d been to his place before. Often for a barbecue he hosts on a weekend when everyone is back in town for a mission. But you’d never been here like this. Alone, with your heart racing, and knees weak. As he finally and firmly pressed his lips to the back of your neck, his hands gripping your hips tightly while he shut the door with his foot. 
The silence felt different here. It pressed and pressed and pressed until you could feel the desire claw at your chest, begging you to give in.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
A breath escaped you—short and shuddering. “I didn’t pick truth.”
“The fuck you didn’t,” he mumbled, his fingers gripping the back of your neck as he leaned his back against the door.
“Rooster—” His teeth sunk into your skin, pain piercing the flesh until it spread through your body.
“You know?”
Your eyes fluttered shut, fingers scrabbling to grip at any part of him you could reach. “Yes.”
“You know what?”
“Don’t make me say it.”
Except you knew he would. You knew he’d make you repeat the words until you no longer had a voice, because he was greedy. He wanted more than you could give, but devoured it all the same. If Bradley had his way, he’d have said these words three fucking years ago when you had beat him in a game of pool—eyes bright from the single beer you downed. You were sunlight in human form and he wanted to soak in your rays.
“I’m gonna,” he breathed, fingers tracing down your stomach to the belt on your waistband. “Because I love you.”
Your eyes flew open, a gasp ripping from your chest. “Bradley…”
“There she is.”
Heat spilled over from your chest, sliding down your body as if you had just ingested a warm drink. He longed to pick you open and see what was inside. To know your emotions as well as you knew his. It should have infuriated you, made you want to rip at his clothes and shut him up entirely. But the feeling from earlier rose up again, silencing your need to run away. It gave you a leg to stand on.
Turning in his hold, you pressed your lips to his, giving into the blinding ache that nearly killed you. He sagged against your body with a defeated groan, his hands pulling and tugging as if he could wrap you around him again and again. He was so far gone for you that even when you began to step back, he followed—refusing to break the kiss.
His tongue swept into your mouth, fingers digging into your ass, and it made you feel weak. Dizzy almost.
“Go sit on the couch.”
He shook his head, licking into your open mouth. “‘M busy.”
Fighting the smile was no use this time around. Tugging sharply at his hair you felt yourself clench around nothing when he moaned, his eyes rolling slightly and mouth falling open. You stored that knowledge away for later.
“Sit on the couch for me baby,” you purred.
The high that entered your brain at the sight of him shivering just from one word was unlike anything you’d ever felt. No amount of flying in dangerous jets could bring you that emotion. Because it wasn’t adrenaline. It was power.
Simply the knowledge that you could get him to do anything sent you reeling; your body now at a temperature that was surely destructive. He pulled away reluctantly, stumbling back until his ass was planted firmly on the couch cushions, legs spread wide and cock pressing against the seam of his too tight jeans.
Fuck you wanted to ruin him.
“What do you want me to do?”
His eyes widened slightly, hands pressing down into his thighs. “What…”
“You won the bet.” Stepping closer, you watched his pupils dilate as he sucked in enough air to not pass out. You leaned closer, hands pressing over his and teeth pulling at his bottom lip. “So tell me what you want.”
“Strip for me,” he blurted out without control, the stain on his cheeks turning a few shades darker. A blooming crimson.
You grinned, nudging your nose with his. “As you wish.”
The old nearly broken record player sat on a weathered table in the corner of his room. Records stacked haphazardly beside it and you considered going through each one. If not to find the perfect song, then to sneak a peek into what type of man he was, but he was sitting impatiently on the couch as you flipped a record onto the turntable. The needle fell with the smooth ease of being used over and over again, scratching slightly until the echo of a sensual modern song began.
“I pegged you for an oldies only kind of guy,” you smirked over your shoulder, catching sight of his body twitching.
He blew out a breath. “Not always.”
“Hm.” You turned, fingers toying with the hem of the tight top Phoenix bought you a week ago. She claimed it was for going out purposes. You knew she meant Rooster. “Good to know.”
He expected you to strip quickly and fall into his lap. Which proved why he was surprised to see you pad over to him slowly. Hips swaying in time with the song, hands sliding along your body as if you wanted it to be him touching you instead. Oh how he wanted to fucking touch you. Bradley felt his mouth dry when you pulled at the buckle of your belt, undoing the button and zipper—only to leave it that way.
“Baby,” he panted, anxiously shifting on the couch, his heart pounding so hard in his chest he swore you could hear it.
“Yes?”
“You don’t have to…” He felt his mouth fall open as your shirt slid up your torso, sliding off entirely and leaving you in a lacy very see-through bra. “Oh fuck.”
“Thought you said you wanted me to strip?”
“I do. Fuck I do.” He was going to die. You were going to kill him. And you hadn’t even touched him yet.
You turned, arms raising as you lowered yourself into his lap, biting back a giggle when he audibly groaned. He sounded like you punched him right in the chest, shoving the sound out and forcing it to echo in the room. Bradley’s hands grasped at your sides, marveling at how soft you were, but your hips shifting to sway with the song did him in.
“You’re supposed to only watch,” you teased, eyes falling shut at his warm touch.
“Forget stripping.” He helped your hips move, eyes stuck on the peek of the lacy underwear you wore peeking from the opening of your pants. “I’ll have you like this.”
“But the bet—”
“Fuck the bet.”
He cupped your chin in his hand, lips sliding messy and wet along yours with a desperation you’d never felt before from anyone. If you didn’t know better, you would think he was trying to imprint himself in your tastebuds. Stain you with his flavor until you would be unable to forget him. It sunk into your chest, crawling through your veins, and for a moment you felt yourself forget what you were doing.
Pulling away with a gasp, he reached for your jeans, pulling them down to bare your ass to him. He moaned raggedly, forehead falling to your shoulder at the sight.
“Fuck. You’re perfect everywhere,” he breathed, tugging your underwear to the side, catching how it clung to the slick that practically poured out of you.
You sighed all sweet and soft and Bradley felt his cock jolt in his jeans. He wasn’t going to last more than ten minutes. He’d be fucking lucky to get inside you first. But with the way you squirmed under his touch, you seemed to be right there with him. He matched your breath with one of his own before he undid his pants, pulling himself out swiftly with very little touching.
Anything more and he’d lose it.
“Can I…” Nerves jumped under his chest, making him rethink everything for a brief moment. A horrible habit he had even up in the air.
“Bradley.”
His eyes snapped to yours. “Yeah?”
“If you don’t fuck me I’m leaving,” you whispered.
It was meant to be a joke to jolt him out of his stupor. You knew that you couldn’t leave even if you tried. You were stuck to him—a part of him.
But your words seemed to spur him on. He lined himself up with shaky hands, his breaths coming in just the same, and with a small push he began to sink into you. Bradley had his fair share of sex in his life. It was an act of relief half of the time. But this? He wasn’t prepared for the sheer amount of bliss that would slam into him, a choked grunt tearing from his throat.
“Fuck, fuck—” He clamped an arm around your waist to keep you still. “I’m not gonna—fucking god.”
You felt the breath punch from your lungs, a shaky breath escaping you as he finally pushed the final inch into you, stilling completely at the feeling. Full. That’s what you had been missing when you did this. The fullness that left you gasping for air, the emotions that spilled over like blood from a wound.
You needed him to move, but knew he was trying to keep himself on a tight leash. His stability and sense went out the window the second you looked at him. It deteriorated on the way here, and finally…he could see the final fragments begin to fade. Turn to ash right before his eyes as burning paper would. Was he on fire? He felt like he was.
“Baby,” you whined, the pitch so high and perfect he could feel his heart swell in his chest.
He loved you.
He loved you.
Fuck…he loved you.
But he wasn’t going to last. He determined that he’d make it up to you on the first thrust; that he’d spend all night between your plush thighs making you scream his name. Because he was four thrusts in and his balls were already drawing up.
If only he focused long enough to see how your mouth hung open in a silent moan. Your fingernails dug into his arm, drawing blood to the surface, and you’d apologize later. You’d kiss it better once this was all over, because your body was pulling taut above his. He shoved into you with a stunted grind of his hips, nudging against bliss—drawing you even higher. You severely underestimated how on the edge you were.
“‘M sorry,” he mumbled. “I’ll—fuck—I’ll make you come sweetheart. ‘M gonna make you come.”
His hand pushed beneath your pants that weren’t even off entirely, fingers sliding through your slick until the rough pads nudged roughly against your clit. You arched into the touch and cried out raggedly, electricity shooting down your spine.
“Not gonna last.” He bit into your shoulder with a groan, his hips slamming up into you one last time as he fell to pieces. Only for you to follow immediately. His name was a breathless shout on your lips; a sound he wanted burned into his mind.
You didn’t understand the babble of words that spilled out as you came down, your body wracked with jolts of pleasure. And his hands became a warm soothing balm along your skin. Something to bring you back to yourself. Even if it did take a moment.
“I love you.” He grinded into you slowly, sluggishly. Without a care in the world other than those words. “I do, I love you.”
He wished you could see the smile on his face, but something told him you knew it was there. His hands cupped your breasts, thumbs running along your clothed nipple. Simply to watch you shudder. To see your body melt into his touch again. If he wasn’t addicted before. He was now.
“I know,” he said.
You scoffed, a flare of what you knew was adoration but faked as irritation crawled up your chest. “Shut up.”
Nudging his chest with your elbow, you felt his body shake as he laughed. Heat blooming beneath the skin of your cheeks. He could be the worst person alive. But you couldn’t deny what you already knew. What you’d known for a long time.
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seulgiwifeee · 2 months
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Your stories are adorable. Can you please write irene taking care of sick reader after reader didnt listen to her and decided to play in the snow without a proper coat.
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♡ Member: Irene x Femreader
♡ Theme: Fluff
♡ Warning: Idk,, she calls you stupid but it's just out of love lololol  o̴̶̷̤ ̫ o̴̶̷̤ , she’s very teasing
Word count: 1.9k
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"Joohyun! Joohyun!"
In the kitchen where Irene once was peacefully cooking breakfast, she was startled from the sudden bang of the front door slamming into the wall, followed behind with the roar of your mini outburst. The jumpy girl quickly turned with a gasp to face where she'd heard your cheery voice belt from, staring at you with wide eyes as she held onto her thumping heart. You could've at least given the poor girl a heads ups before bursting in like that.
"Sorry sorry, but look what I made for you!" you exclaimed with a joyful smile, quickly bouncing up and down like a hyper child while you proudly showed off the snow duck you had spent minutes upon minutes molding to perfection.
Irene gleamed as she eyed your creation, but her smile faded as quickly as it came once she put her focus back up, noticing how you were wearing nothing but a measly, thin zip-up jacket, nothing to cover your head or ears whatsoever and didn't even bother to change out from your pajama pants.
"Y/N-AH!" Irene whined angrily, marching towards you. A shiver jolted throughout her small body from a chilly winter breeze swirling past the opened door and with a clenched fist to her side, her other grabbed onto your jacket. "Are you crazy? What's this?! Where's your coat? How did you expect this little thing to cover you up?!"
Oh.
You stood frozen for a second, staring at Irene a bit stunned. All you were trying to do was show your girlfriend the cute little snow duck you made for her.. you weren't expecting to get fussed at in return.
"Oh don't worry, Hyun! I wasn't outside for probably any more than ten minutes. I doubt a coat was really necessary," you assured in a  sweet tone trying to calm her down but all she did was shoot you one of those looks that quickly silenced you from saying any further words and ran her hand up to your rosy cheek, shuddering once she felt how freezing it was.
"You're literally freezing, Y/N. I don't care how long you stayed out there, you can still get sick!" Irene stressed, taking the snow duck from you and carefully placing it back outside beside the bushes, immediately closing the door once she stepped back inside.
"Baby, don't worry!" you whined, crossing your arms. "I promise you, I'm fi-f-f-"
You couldn't even finish your sentence before a dramatic, very poorly-timed sneeze slipped out, cutting you off. Man, why does universe always have to mess up every chance you get when trying to prove Irene wrong at something.
Irene placed her hands on her hips, her lips pursed and tilted her head at you. "Yeah, that's what I thought." Irene grabbed onto your wrist and led you down the hallway to your room. "See, I told you you should've worn the coat, but no, just don't listen to me I guess."
You lowered your head in embarrassment, mumbling a low but sarcastic 'My bad' as you scratched your neck.
"Come on, baby. I promise I'm not sick! That was just one stupid sneeze, it doesn't prove anything!" you insisted while Irene hurriedly started pulling off your outdoor clothes.
"Oh really?"
"Yeah!" you sniffed, rubbing the back of your hand over your congested nose. "That was just a little in-the-moment sneeze. I bet you I won't be sneezing anymore by the next hour or two!"
Irene quirked a challenging brow, cocking her head and crossed her arms, staring at you with an almost amused look. "Oh really?"
"Yeah!"
"Ohh really?"
"Yeah really!" You mentally slapped yourself as another mistimed sneeze snuck out.
Her firm look never faltered, but she unfolded her arms and shrugged. "Alright then, Y/N. Whatever you say."
She patted your shoulder and walked off back into the kitchen to continue her cooking.
You placed your hands on your hips as you watched her walk off, a determined look now displayed confidently on your features.
You know what?.. Yeah! You weren't sick and you were going to prove Irene wrong!
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{Next day}
"ACHOO!"
Or.. maybe you weren't.
Irene sighed as she pulled another tissue out for you. "I know you regret not wearing that coat now, huh?"
You purposefully avoided eye contact with Irene and fanned her off, taking the tissue and gave a nasty little blow into it. "Oh whatever."
Irene's smirk was hidden behind her face mask as she turned on the mini heater and faced it towards you. "I bet you wish that you would've just listened to me.."
Uninterested in her teasing, you just shook your head and mumbled an 'ahuh.'
"You know.. because I was right."
"Okay okay I get it already! Sheesh!" you weakly shoved Irene's shoulder as she held her stomach cackling at you. “You were right and I was being stupid! There, I said it!"
You knew all Irene wanted to hear was that she was right right right and that you were always wrong wrong wrong whenever you'd never take her advice. And you honestly couldn't even get mad because.. well.. it's true, no matter how many times you've tried to prove her wrong.
You're just a little klutz, you can't help it! But that's one of the things Irene loves most about you since it ignites a little more of a chaotic spark in your relationship.
Irene ran her hand down your face and cupped your puffy cheek, pinching it teasingly as she slightly leaned down. "I know."
You scrunched your nose at her smugness, seeing her wide smile shine through her mask as she trailed down your side, placing a tiny hand on your waist. "You're my stupid little Y/N."
Irene sat up from the bed and placed the tissue box on the nightstand before she left the room.
She arrived back not too long after with a steaming bowl of soup and sat back on the edge of the bed next to you. She scooped up a spoonful of the steamy soup and motioned it towards your mouth. "Say ahh."
You squinted at Irene, raising a declining hand to block your face as you slowly shook your head before clearing your throat to speak at her with your painfully hoarse voice. "You don't have to do all of this. I can still pick up a spoon you know!" you argued with a pout.
"Don't be so stubborn, darling. Just relax and let me take care of you." Irene gently fanned over the spoon to cool off the heat. "Now, open wide for the airplane!" She motioned the spoon in zigzags, making little buzzing noises with her lips as it inched closer to your mouth.
You quickly turned your head, covering your cheeks as they flushed deeply in embarrassment from this childish treatment. "Joohyunn!"
Her own face burned a crimson red as she giggled at you some more. "Okay okay, I'll stop teasing you! But still, open wide, or else I'll change my mind and continue to baby you."
You turned your head back to her reluctantly and slightly parted your lips. Irene slipped the spoon into your mouth letting the hot liquid flow down your throat.
"How is it?" Irene asked as the spoon continued to sit in your mouth. You nodded your head with a smile.
Anything Irene cooks is automatically a ten to you.
An even brighter smile was shown behind her mask with her risen cheekbones and the wrinkles formed in the corners of her eyes. "Good. I had to make it perfect just for you!"
You continued to let her feed you until you had gotten full and decided to take a quick nap.
"Nope! Nope. You're insane if you think I'm taking that." You swayed your head away each time she dared to shove the tiny shot of that disgusting red goop anywhere near your lips.
"Y/N!" Irene groaned as you continued to squirm around, purposefully being difficult with her. "Unless you want to stay sick longer you need to take this medicine."
"Well, maybe I do want to stay sick!" you humphed as you hid your head beneath the pillow.
Irene narrowed her eyes. "Come on! If you just drink it really fast it'll be over before you realize it!" Irene encouraged but you still shook your head relentlessly. "Absolutely not!"
Irene threw her head back as she sighed. "Y/N.."
You groaned as you slowly turned your face back over to Irene. "Finee." You parted your lips just barely enough for air to flow in and out.
Irene quickly, yet still not fast enough, poured that horrid cherry syrup into your mouth. You instantly made wincing faces and gagged dramatically as you speedily shook your head. It seriously took everything in you to not spit that bitter mess back into her face.
Irene placed the cup down and grabbed a tissue to wipe the little droplets of medicine that accidentally spilled around your mouth. "See? Wasn't too bad, right?"
All you could do was whine in response as you continued to shake your head in disagreement.
Irene entered the dimly lit room to check up on you while she held a cup of honey tea in one hand.
She quietly chuckled to herself once she spotted how you laid in the bed; your vision going on and off as you were on the brink of sleep with your phone gradually slipping more out of your hand as you halfmindedly scrolled on it and your nose just completely stuffed with crumpled tissues.
She walked over to you and took away your phone before you could end up dropping it on your face.
"Hey!.. I was using that!" you weakly called out, struggling to even keep your eyes open as you followed the movements of Irene placing your phone on the nightstand.
"Sure.." Irene placed the tea down and climbed into the bed, laying right beside you.
She leaned up and pulled out all the tissues from your nose, wincing when she saw your gross mucus string out your nose and quickly threw them into the tiny trash can beside your bed that was already brimming with other used tissues from that day.
She wiped away any other residue around your nose and once cleaned up she grabbed the humidifier from the stand and held it under your nose. "I brought you some tea so whenever you want to drink it it’ll be on the stand."
You hummed in response but did no more than continue to lay put in the same spot.
Irene continued to let the humidifier run until she noticed you how you’d gone motionless, assuming you had finally fallen asleep.
She removed it from under you and placed it back on the stand. She lowered the brightness on the lamp and laid back down, wrapping her arms around your waist and leaning in close. "Y/N?"
There's no reply from you as she whispered your name a second time just to confirm that you were asleep.
She gently grazed a hand along your face and stared down at you, gazing at you with heart eyes as she admired her one and only lover. "Oh my stupid little Y/N.." she leaned in and placed a kiss on your cheek through her mask. "I love you."
Though your body language showed her otherwise, it didn’t take away from the fact that you were still awake, conscious just enough to comprehend her teasing words and feel her warming touches. You couldn't help yourself as a tiny smile lifted the corners of your lips.
You moved your leg to intertwine with hers, catching her off guard, but she eased into your touch and twisted your legs tighter. You turned your head to her, leaning in close and lifted your heavy eyes to look at her so you could speak one last time before going back to your nightly rest.
"I love you too, Joohyun."
You know, you can never go wrong ending a fluff with a good ole "I love you" also, ALWAYS listen to the Bae Joohyun's advice >:( !!
— Seulgiwifee ໒꒰ྀི♡˵ᴗ͈ . ᴗ͈ ꒱ྀི১
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traumxrei-archive · 1 year
Text
【 (waking up) next to you 】
prompt #4: They slept in the same bed for reasons but now he was waking up and there’s something about their bleary eyes and mussed hair (ft. deuce spade, silver, azul ashengrotto)
gn! prefect (you/yours), drabbles, word count: 1.1k
a/n: i'm back with more short drabbles !! i had a grand time having trouble keeping these short— like could you tell i wanted to write more for most of these jsfjdfk (also the azul favoritism bc i like teasing him too much)
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Deuce Spade
( set during the events of book 5 )
Deuce Spade was fucked. He had woken up in a bed that isn't his. Normally that would be fine, since he probably just mistook one of roommate's beds for his own. But this...was very much not fine.
He had stumbled into "his" room last night after an exhaustive rehearsal. The closer they got to the SDC performance, the harder the training was. And he had collapsed into "his" bed. Thinking about it now, he was sure he heard a startled noise somewhere. But he barely had time to think before sleep claimed him.
"Shit," Deuce muttered, raking a hand down his face because he wasn't in "his" bed.
He was in your bed.
The evidence was clear as day, with the way your warmth was against his back, arms wrapped around his middle. At first he really thought he was dreaming, but then he felt your breath tickling his nape.
He probably would've had more of a crisis if you hadn't suddenly stirred. He held his breath as you seemed to wake, yawning somewhere near his ear.
"Deuce?" Your raspy morning voice made him shiver. "You awake?"
"Y-yeah," Deuce squeaked. (He didn't even know his voice could go that high.) You tugged at his shoulder and he could now see your sleep lined face. You looked...cute when you were sleepy.
"It's still early," You mumbled, using his shoulder as a cushion. "Let's sleep more."
"O-okay," He used his other hand to pat at your head and soon, your breathing had evened out. He pressed a hand against his chest, right over where his heart was thundering.
Well...Deuce Spade was definitely fucked.
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Silver
Silver wasn't a stranger to falling asleep. Really, he did it all the time. But this had to be one of the first times that someone had fallen asleep with him.
He blinked his eyes open, the sleepy haze promptly disappearing as he stretched. Only there was an unfamiliar weight on his shoulder. And when he looked down....
Oh. It was you. Lying on his shoulder. Fast asleep.
Silver rubbed at his eyes. Clearly, he was dreaming. That was the only explanation as to why you were so peacefully cuddled up to his shoulder, the sunlight shrouding your figure in morning glow. This was a dream, right? Or else why would he be so near to...
"An angel," He murmured under his breath. He immediately stiffened as he watched you shift, your eyes slowly fluttering open. Ah, he had woken you up with his voice.
"Sil...ver...?" You rubbed at your eyes, just as he did seconds before.
"My apologies," He said, carefully avoiding your eyes. "Your nap was disturbed because of me."
Your hand turned him to face you, "I slept well thanks to your protection, Sir Silver." And Silver felt his ears turn hot, no doubt flushing under your stare.
"You..." Silver couldn't finish his sentence, instead hiding his face above your head and praying that you couldn't see how easily your words affected him. You really did know what to do to make a knight lose his composure.
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Azul Ashengrotto
( set during the events of book 4 )
Azul Ashengrotto never thought a day would come where he would have to share a small rickety bed with anyone. But here he was, stuck in the Scarabia dorms, staring in disbelief at the ceiling and then to you, who was sleeping peacefully by his side.
He recounted the events of last night sourly, glancing over at the tweels and Grim, who were sharing a king-sized bed after winning a game of rock-paper-scissors. Azul mentally cursed the Scarabia students for not providing a big enough bed. Otherwise, he would've been able to avoid—
You shifted, your hold on his waist tightening as you sighed in content.
Azul cradled his face in his hands. This was impossible. He was never going to regain his status or composure in time for when you woke up. And worse than that, his heart was currently beating out of his chest.
And why was that? It was because—
"Azul-senpai." He stiffened. Maybe if he pretended to be asleep, he didn't have to answer to the soft call of your voice. But no, you moved once more, "Azul." This time your voice was so close to his ear that he had no choice but to flinch.
"A-Ah, Prefect," Azul's voice came out wobbly. "Have you finally awakened? I'm glad that you woke up, but—"
There was a hand tugging at his wrist, and his eyes finally met yours. Your appearance was definitely one of someone who was just asleep. He assumed that his was the same, so...why did he find the sleepy droop of your eyes adorable?
His heart leapt in his throat when you leaned in, "Good morning, Azul-senpai. You're up way too early."
"F-Force of habit," He bit his lip when his voice wavered. "Do we have to be so close?"
"Why?" You smiled at him, and your fingers intertwined with his own. "You like it, don't you?" He liked it? He...couldn't deny that. But he had to deny that, he couldn't just outwardly—
"Your thoughts are so noisy, I can see it written all over your face," You yawned again before flopping back onto the bed. "Let's just sleep a bit more." Azul made no move to comment as you made yourself comfortable, and he tried not to tremble when your arms wrapped around him once more.
"For the record," Azul mumbled. "I-I'm doing this because we lost rock-paper-scissors. Not because of any ulterior motives."
"Uhuh," You said, very obviously unconvinced. "For the record, I'm cuddling with you without any ulterior motives either." Sevens, what was Azul going to do with you? There was such blatant sarcasm in your tone, yet he couldn't help but melt into your embrace.
But he did have to ask himself...did his ulterior motives match up to yours? And if so, did that mean that he could...do this with you again? Azul buried his head into your shoulder. No, he shouldn't be thinking about that or getting greedy. He should just...forget this and go to sleep. That's right, he should just go to sleep.
As if Azul was going to be able to go to sleep in this type of situation. (Azul ended up staying awake the whole time while you slept. And when the Scarabia students came to whisk everyone away for training, Kalim had commented on the bags under his eyes. You had shot him a cheeky smile after that.)
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thank you so much for reading these drabblessss !!! if you'd like to see more drabbles or ficlets from the 600 followers event, check it out here ! and if you'd like to check out more writing, here's my masterlist >:DD
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junhui-png · 2 months
Text
Starring: love ˙✧˖📷 ⋆。 ˚
actor!jeonghan x fem!reader
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Summary: You always had trouble finding love, but that never bothered you as you like to be independent. You had opened a cafe on Main Street all by yourself and was things were going great without a boyfriend so you simply thought “who needs a boyfriend anyways?” ? But that changed once you had met the man of everyone’s dream, Yoon Jeonghan.
Notes: I'm finally cured from write block, and I felt like writing something else besides "Puppy Love' but dont worry I haven't abandoned it, like I promised it's coming back in may but till then please enjoy this short series!
Warnings: Cursing and thats really it…
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"Order for Michaela!" Your voice boomed over the chattering of your customers. It was a Friday and you hadn't had the least of doubt that it was going to be busy that morning. You opened up a cozy cafe on Main street with your best friend, Lee Seokmin, who you've known since Highschool, and your part timers, Kim Chaewon and Lee Sohee who have also been with you since the store had first opened. "y/n I'm gonna clock out in a bit ok?" Chaewon taps on your shoulder and you give her a slight nod. You continue to serve and take orders till closing time, were you, Seokmin, and Sohee were closing up the shop. "Imma head out first, see ya'll tomorrow!" Seokmin flashes his signature golden smile while walking out the front door, waving us goodbye. You and Sohee finish cleaning up the cafe shortly after Seokmin's depature and make your way towards your apartment complex "You know Yoon Jeonghan?" Sohee speaks up "No..?" You reply "Of course you don't your a fuckin old hag" Sohee says with a sigh, continuing to scroll through his phone "God, you kids are so disrespectful now a days" You scoff, grabbing a hold of his neck and tug at the back of his neck, causing him to yell out in pain "thats what you get you brat" you chuckle, Sohee takes a few steps away from you, for safety measures. "But like I was saying, He's apparently coming to New York to film a drama" He says, a hint of excitement laced through his voice "Sohee, New York is big, what are the possibilities that he's going to be filming anywhere near main street?" Sohee lets out a sigh at your down putting response "Wow thanks alot." His tone sarcastic. You both make it to your apartment complex before parting ways. You open the door to your apartment and immedtaly throw your bag to the side and remove your shoes. Your quick to change into your pajamas and brush you teeth etc. You got into bed, ready to go to sleep when your phone buzzes. "He might start filming this week" Read the text Sohee had sent you. You let out a "tsk" in response and simply send him a thumbs up emoji before heading to bed.
The next morning you changed into your usually work attire, a simple white button up with a pair of cream colored dress pants. You wear your favorite pair of white sneakers and grab your bag before leaving your apartment. Once you make it to the front of your apartmen Sohee is already outside, waiting for you. Sohee lives only a few stories apove your apartment, which was also how you had met him before the opening of your cafe. You and Sohee begin the short walk over to your cafe. Both you and Sohee's phones light up from a text sent in your groupchat. "What the hell is going on" Chaewon had sent with a photo of a bunch of vans and camera and people crowding main street "What's happening?" Sohee only shrugs in response as you continue your way to work, only a little faster this time. Once you had arrived at the cafe both Chaewon and Seokmin rushed up to the two of you "Whats going on?" Sohee asks, glaring over at the chaos to the left of the cafe "I think there filming something" Seokmin says, pointing out that the people who were rushing around were all wearing shirts that read "Staff" on the back. With that, Sohee gasps, catching you all off guard "Yoon Jeonghan!" He shrieks and you all whip your head over towards the set to see a beautiful man with long luscious black hair that reached down to about his shoulder and a tall and slender build. His aura soft yet powerful, his delicate features complimenting everything about him. “Wow.." he truly looked like an angel. "god he's beautiful" Chaewon's mouth basically hanging open as she watches the beautiful man "I told you!" Sohee shakes you out of your trance. "Ok guys let's just open up the shop, alright?" You fumble through your bag to find the keys to the store.
Today was even more busy then it had been yesterday and the four of you definitely all knew why. Yoon Jeonghan. But you didn't mind, after all it was just bring you in more money. The day went by quickly, people rushing in and out, customers complaining, and so one. Basically another normal day just five times more hectic. You begin to clean up around the store when you hear the bells from the front door go off "Welcome!" You shout, turning your customers service voice back on. You place the broom down and turn around, your eyes widen at the site in front of you. Yoon Jeonghan simply standing there, glancing over the menu above you. His hair put up into a ponytail, his bangs slightly coming undone in front of his face. You quickly fix yourself before rushing over to the cashier "What would you recommend?" His fixes his glance down to you, making eye contact. You immediately look down towards the register, feeling flustered. "Depends on what you like" You shrug, clearing your throat and looking back up at him and he nods "Maybe something sweet?" He says "How about a Vanilla latte?" You suggest "I'll take whatever you suggest" The beautiful man says, a small smirk on his lips. "Alright that will be $4.45" The man pulls out his card and hands it to you, which you swipe it through the reader "Your order will be out in a few minutes" You flash him a smile and he returns it "Take your time" You immediately get to work on his order when Chaewon and Sohee both come rushing to your side from the supply room "No way that just happened" Chaewon grabs onto your arm all giddy. "I think he wants you" Sohee giggles, shaking you for the second time today "Ya'll are too much, just go finish closing up" You roll your eyes and the two giggle before rushing off into the back. You place the cap on his order and place it on the pick-up table "Sir your order is ready" You call out and his head snaps up from his phone. He gets up and picks up the coffee giving you a smile "Thank you" his voice so sweet your heart was filled with warmth "Of course, please enjoy!" You return the smile. You watch as he walks towards the door and you turn back around to turn off the lights "Oh and also sorry for the bother outside" You turn around and Jeonghan is still standing there by the door. He points outside to the Vans and people by the side of your cafe "Don't worry about it, good luck on your shoot" Jeonghan takes one more look towards your before heading out. You turn off the lights and pack up. Once you walk out Sohee is there again, waiting for you "god he's so beautiful.." You let out a sigh, sensing a rant coming up "And first of all, This was the first time I've ever seen you flustered in like what 4 years which is actually insane" And just like that Sohee's rant began "I was so shocked you like never show any emotions besides like anger and just being calm I guess.” Sohee pauses and look at you for a second "I mean I'm not calling you some heartless freak but you kinda are" You roll your eyes at the kids honest statement "AND the way he looked at you, HELLO? That shit was for sure love at first sight" Sohee giggles like a middle school fangirl at the last part "Ok bud.." You say with sarcasm and he laughs "No I'm being serious, he was definitely tryna get your attention" Sohee begins once again "I'll take whatever you suggest" Sohee says, mimicking what Jeonghan had said earlier "I mean come on, he was definitely flirting" Sohee scoffs a bit at your at your very little knowledge of romance "First of all, I wasn't flustered and second he wasn't flirting he literally just didnt know what to get" You say but Sohee shakes his head. The two of you reach your apartment complex and say your goodnights before heading your separate ways. You enter your apartment and get ready to sleep, the thoughts of earlier replaying in your head and you giggle at the thought of what Sohee had said "What the hell.." You mumble to yourself. "What's up with you today?' You thought to yourself but you were to tired to think to much of it and just went to bed.
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kentopedia · 2 months
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Can you drop some long series recs (any fandom!)?! I haven't had any come across my dash >.< Would love to read some!
omg of course!! I HAVE SO SO MANY RECS! a lot of the ones i've seen recently are ongoing, but i hope you give them a go & keep watching for updates <3 i have read quite a variety, so hopefully there's something for you tehe. some of them i haven't read yet, but have been on my list bc i enjoy their other works :) so i recommend them to since i know the writers are amazing!!
across the universe by @lovedazai (dazai, complete) - mai actually just posted the last part yesterday, so this is a great one to start with tehe. everything she writes is so lovely & she knows dazai sooo well. i'm so excited to see finish it!
to have and to hold by @fedyenkas (chuuya, ongoing) - i just started this one today & it's so so amazing so far !! chuuyas characterization in it is sooo yummy. i haven't read a hybrid series before, so it's super unique to see how that fits into the bsd universe.
noble blood by @forest-hashira (satoru & suguru, ongoing) - i haven't read this one yet, but both of fallon's entries for my collab were incredible, so i can only imagine this is too! plus, the premise is SO insane, it's about dragon riders, and there's an entire sheet with all lore that they've created !! i can see how much love and care was put into this one, so i can't wait to check it out !!
oh, baby! by @tetsuskei (kuroo, ongoing) - i have yet to read the first part (everyone throw tomatoes at me) but risu posted some parts on her old blog & i read it there! it's so so sweet!! i looove all her writing, and dad!kuroo is just the cutest thing EVER.
waterloo by @fyorina (dazai, ongoing) - i haven't read this one yet either but i am SO SO incredibly excited to get to it. this one is going to be long, so it might be what you're looking for !! the first two parts are out already, and there's a posting schedule if you want to know when they're coming out :)
bulletproof love by @staryukis (gojo, ongoing) - i've really enjoyed this one so far and logan's writing is so captivating <3 it feels just like missing scenes from in between the canon jjk storyline. logan also has a mini zombie apocalypse series i've been excited to read after reading the other series !! it's dying (for your love).
regrets by @/kingkonoha (levi, complete) is so good !! i still need to finish it, but the concept is super cool & the reader is the antagonist so it's a really interesting spin on levi's actions in the canon universe.
tidal temptations by @fyodorloveclub (fyodor, ongoing) - i have also yet to read this one (cries myself to sleep my tbr is never ending), but everything flora writes is incredible, so i have no doubt this one is too. it's a merman fyodor fic, which is such a cool concept i'm so excited to see where it goes !!!
hell within reach by @/ddarker-dreams (chrollo, complete) - omg. ok i read this one like 2 years ago LOL, but it's finished and its about 80k long, and it's so good <3 i used to be an insane chrollo girlie & this is one of my favorite fics about him.
lover's delight by @lovelyluc (diluc, ongoing) - i don't even play genshin or know anything about it HSHFSDFH but this one is so sweet <3 you can really see how much awea loves diluc in this series, which is my favorite thing about reading fics, and it has so many of my favorite tropes !!
geheinisse by @honeybleed (jean & reiner, ongoing) - only the first part of this is out but it's SO INCREDIBLE. there's so much drama already, and nara does such a great job of setting the scene while getting you hooked immediately. nara also has a two part reiner fic (the first part is decades) that's completed and over 10k words that i'll never forget! her characterization of reiner is so yummy.
if it wasn't for him (would you have me) by @gojoath (yuuta, ongoing) - cella's the ceo of yandere yuuta, so if you're into him, i can't think of anyone else to recommend !!! cella wrote another yuuta series that i think is completed, so there are lots of amazing things to read on her blog <3
@osaemu has a streamer!gojo series that are all in the same universe & connect! they're so funny & everything sabs writes is amazing, so i encourage you to check out her work if you haven't
the lakehouse by @tetzoro (kuroo, ongoing) - rahhh i'm the worst bc i still haven't read this but aims is one of my favorite writers on here, so trust me it's amazing. this was written for october, so if you're missing autumn rn def read this one! aims also has another kuroo series coming soon <3
i know i left some people out, so if you're ever in need of any other recs, pls lmk tehe. and if you're a mootie of mine but have a series i didn't include, send it my way <3 but hopefully all these amazing ones will get you started!
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reverie-starlight · 10 months
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crawling back to you- fushiguro megumi
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just something silly I started a while back that I'm finally finishing up!! i'm very in love with megumi and since I was doing a season one rewatch with my dad, I have plenty of megumi-centered thoughts I can't talk abt with him. but I can write them!! and YES okay the title was a failed bug pun.
warnings: just fluff! death of a spider, though. megumi is a little annoyed, but it gets resolved super fast, so no angst at all.
gn! reader, no specified gender or physical description, but they do stay in the girl's dorms for this fic for the sole purpose of being nobara's next door neighbour!!
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You opened your door and stopped in your tracks when you saw something scuttle across the ceiling from the corner of your eye.
A loud gasp was released and Nobara, already in her PJs, peeked out from her door to see what the fuss was. “Y/n? You okay?”
You frantically beckon her over, your eyes never leaving the beast that decided to infiltrate your room. She made it to your side and followed your eyes.
“Ew! Why’d you have to show me a spider right as I’m about to go to bed? Now I’m going to be paranoid all night, thanks a lot.” She crossed her arms and made a yuck face.
“Nobara,” you started, deadly serious, clutching her arm. “I need you to use your hammer and nails to get this thing. We don’t have to get close to it that way.”
She looked as though she was seriously considering it for a moment before reluctantly shaking her head. “Y/n, cursed energy is for jujutsu work, not creepy crawlies. Besides, it’d leave some nasty holes in your wall.”
You sighed and almost resigned yourself to having to find a long stick or something to get it with. But then she spoke again.
“What about Fushiguro? He brings out his demon dog for you to play with all the time, right? What’s one more non-curse related job for a frog who’d probably love a snack?”
This finally brought your attention away from the eight legged monster on your ceiling. You looked at her with so much admiration and thanks and hugged her tightly. “Oh, Nobara you’re a genius! Thank y-“
You visibly deflated when you realized that your boyfriend wasn’t exactly happy with you at that moment.
Nobara winced. “Ouch, is he still upset?”
You nodded and frowned. Of course this would happen at a time you didn’t have him as back up.
It was a petty argument that got you into this situation- in the shared kitchen for the students, you accidentally ate a snack of his that he had been saving, which you apologized for. Great! Should’ve been over with after that, right?
…Except you accidentally did it again the next day AND forgot to put his milk back in the fridge that he had just measured out for some recipe he was excited to try.
And even though you apologized and he reassured you that it wasn’t that big of a deal, mistakes happen, he still wasn't letting you hang out in his room after training as usual. He seemed to be annoyed with you at the very least.
With the long week he’s had from being sent on two missions back to back, you understood why. He really need the mental break that you accidentally took away.
So yeah, you really doubted that he’d be willing to kill a spider for you when he’d barely even talked to you in the past 24 hours (save for his usual good morning text and a peck on the cheek when he saw you in person).
Nobara patted your back and sighed. "I think you should go ask him anyway. He's probably suffering from Y/n withdrawals by now, you know? Yuuji said he was sure he caught Fushiguro pouting on their jog earlier. Could be a good sign."
You looked at her hopefully and smiled. "Thanks, Nobara, but I think I'll just wait until morning. I'm sure if I could just find a-" your attention was drawn back to the ceiling and a feeling of dread washed over you. "Nope, I'm going right now, the spider's fucking gone," you quickly shut your door and stepped away.
She made a blended noise of disgust and fear. "Alright, I'm out. Good luck and don't let that thing out. If I see it in my room tomorrow I'm putting my nails through your clothes." She waved and headed back to her room.
You waved back and headed the other direction, towards the boy's dorms. Since it was getting late, you had to be mindful of noise so you wouldn't get caught by any faculty member- especially Gojo.
If he were to catch you "sneaking" over to Megumi's room, you were pretty sure you'd never hear the end of it, and even more sure that it would just irritate your boyfriend further.
So you put your stealth to the test until you were finally at his door. You quietly knocked three times, hoping it was loud enough for him to hear it.
When he opened the door, he raised an eyebrow at you and checked out in the hall before dragging you inside so you could talk at a somewhat normal volume.
And of course you wanted to take the time to make everything up to him, to talk it out for real and not have him be annoyed at you anymore- if Nobara said he was starting to have Y/n Withdrawals, then you had already been feeling the effects of Megumi Withdrawals since his first mission earlier this week- but right now the most pressing matter on your mind was the spider currently lost in your room.
So you decided that sweet talking him was the way to achieve your goal of getting his help.
"Megumi, love and light of my life, my one and only, my beloved-"
"Please stop."
You got down on your knees and took hold of his hand. "I am so sorry that I have ailed you this week, I promise that I will be more mindful moving forward and use my eyes to look for your name on things in the fridge-"
"You don't have to beg for my forgiveness, get up." He was basically a tomato, his whole face red and slightly covered by his hair. If you weren't on such a time crunch, you might keep going just to tease him.
"And I come to enlist your help on a quest that only you have the required tools to complete!"
"Ah, there it is. So you just need my help, then?" He tried to keep the disappointment out of his voice, but you caught it and immediately stood up to explain yourself.
"Baby, no, I do genuinely want to apologize and fix things! But um... yes, I do actually have a problem that only you can help me with."
He sighed and regarded you for a moment before nodding. "Alright, what is it?"
You immediately lit up and shook his hand excitedly. "Really? Thank you so much!"
"So... what is it?"
"There's a spider in my room, and I lost it and I need your toad to eat it."
He gave you a deadpan look before throwing his head back with a long sigh, looking at the ceiling. "Alright, let's go."
On your way back to your room, you fell into silence. Mostly because you didn't want to get caught being out past curfew, but also because neither of you really knew what to say.
Once you were in front of your door, you opened it and let him in. He summoned his toad and helped you search for it (by helped, you really meant he did all the searching while you stood outside and quietly directed him to where you saw it last.
"Can you at least come and help me look?" He asked, currently looking around on the floor under a couple of bags.
You hesitantly walked in, surveying everything before standing next to him to double check.
He broke the silence first. "You know... I really wasn't mad at you for any of the kitchen stuff. I know I told you that already, but I feel like you don't believe it."
You sifted through some clothes. "No, I did. I guess I was just sad that you weren't letting me hang out with you as much. I totally understand it- you needed a break from everything and I respect that, but I wish I could have helped before you got to that point. And I'm serious, I'll keep a better eye out before I accidentally eat your stuff." you both kind of laughed at that.
It was silent again for a couple seconds. "I'm sorry I kind of pushed you away and isolated myself."
You smiled a bit. "I'm sorry I kinda tipped you over the edge."
You turned to face each other for a moment before he wrapped you up in his arms. "You didn't. I promise next time I feel overwhelmed I'll let you know so you don't think I'm upset with you," he mumbled.
"Thank you... I love you."
"I love you too."
You stayed like that for a moment before you pulled back a bit and smirked at him. "Nobara told me that Itadori said you were pouting on you jog together earlier."
He blushed. "I was not. He doesn't know what he's talking about."
You giggled a bit and cupped his face. "I would bet a million yen that you were!"
He groaned and tried to gently pry your hands away from his face. "Stop it... I was not pouting, I don't pout."
"You so do! You're doing it right- holy shit Megumi the spider is right there gET IT PLEASE-"
The sweet moment was ruined by the spider from earlier scuttling across the ceiling over your bed. You jumped onto your boyfriend for protection, even though he couldn't do much while supporting your entire bodyweight so you wouldn't fall. He managed to send the toad after it, and it happily chased it with its tongue.
The spider was no more.
You settled back on the ground and patted the toad on the head before Megumi released it back to the shadows.
You sighed in relief.
"Thank you, my love, I appreciate it."
He nodded at you. "No problem. I should head back to my dorm now before-"
"Want to stay with me?" You tentatively interrupted.
He paused and looked towards you. "We'll get in trouble if we're caught."
You tugged on his hand a little. "Please, Megumi? I've missed you this week..."
He sighed and let you pull him to your bed, hiding a small smile when you cheer. "Fine, but I'm leaving before the sun comes up. I'm not letting Gojo think he has anything over me."
You giggled. "That's fine," and then you both got settled under the covers.
He'd be lying if he said he hadn't missed you while he was isolating himself, but he pushed any thoughts of that away and fell into a peaceful sleep with you in his arms.
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this took foreverrrrr but it's finally done since I have time to write today!! ty for reading, hope you all enjoyed <3
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