I AM ONLY HERE FOR YOUR COMIC ABOUT THE SUN AND MOON PLUSHES.

WHERE MOON IS A BIG BROTHER

WHERE IS IT

Ah, this took me a minute XD so, when I said "a comic about the plushies", I meant the actual plushies XD

Which would be this comic right here. I don't currently have a big brother moon comic in the works...maybe I will later ^^

ᴄᴏʙʀᴀ ᴋᴀɪ ᴅᴀᴛɪɴɢ ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴꜱ (ᴄᴏʙʀᴀ ᴋᴀɪ ʙᴏʏꜱ)

ᴍɪɢᴜᴇʟ ᴅɪᴀᴢ:

->You two are in the same dojos no matter what. When he was in Cobra Kai, you were too. When he switched dojos, you did too.

->You two started dating during season 3.

->He fell first (after the FIRST Sam break up) but you fell harder. ->If you do karate, you two would train together. He doesn't like training with you because he's so scared that he'll hurt you.

->He was so awkward when it came to PDA. He didn't wanna weird you out. He would always ask you if it was okay to hug you or kiss you. Even asked if he could hold your hand.

->You're parents love him soo muchhhh. When he comes over, he'll help out with housework and is overall a gentleman.

->Jealousy levels: 8/10. OH HE IS A JEALOUS MAN. If he thinks that you are getting too comfortable with a guy (or girl), he'll go insane. He wouldn't admit it but his whole mood would change from happy to angry

-> If you speak another language, he'll try to learn it!!

-> His love language is acts of service and physical touch fs (He would gift you smth but bros broke asf) ʀᴏʙʙʏ ᴋᴇᴇɴᴇ:

->You two started dating when he broke up with Sam.

->He doesn't encourage you to do karate because of what happened to him and Miguel but he'll teach you the basics so you can defend yourself.

->He can't cook at all but he'll try to. (yk that one meme where a little girl is standing outside smiling as her house is burning... That's Robby)

->BIG PDA MAN!! Hands around your waist at all times, forehead kisses, and long hugs are a must!! (I want him broo)

->Oh his jealousy levels are high high... 9.5/10 Like it's not like you can't talk to other people but if you two are getting too comfortable with each other.. (el es toxicooo pero lo amamos<3)

->ROBBY DEF TEACHES YOU HOW TO SKATE!! But even allat training, you still can't do an ollie 💀💀💀.

->You visited him during his juvenile times BUT he lowk was a bitch and didn't want to see you because he needed "space"...

->yall made up dw

ᴇʟɪ ᴍᴏꜱᴏɪᴡɪᴢ:

-> This one is for you @yippeeyoppee (you'll get ur kon fanfic when I finish it)

->Moon didn't understand him but you did. You've been there for him before he even became "Hawk", when he was just "the kid with the weird lip"

-> When he was still a nerd: You would always tell him that his lip looks badass (it does idk why ppl hatin) and comfort him when people try to bully him.

->He liked you for a long time but just didn't know how to express it because he thought that YOU THOUGHT HE WAS LAMEEE

-> we all know that Eli is still secretly a nerd... He would definitely make nerdy references from time to time.

->He got a tattoo of your favorite thing on his wrist so he can be reminded of you when he's feeling down.

->Karate is a big no. He's not going to stop you from doing karate but he really doesn't want you to do karate. He's too scared to see you get hurt like Miguel did.

->Jealousy levels are 100/10...Hands around your waist while talking to someone he doesn't know that well. Begging you to leave and stop talking to Robby (when they were beefing). He would probably talk to other girls to get you jealous in order to get you to stop talking to other guys (TOXICOO)

->His love language is physical touch, words of affirmation, and acts of service.

ᴅᴇᴍᴇᴛʀɪ ᴀʟᴇxᴏᴘᴏᴜʟᴏꜱ:

(ima go crazy on this one)

->You're his first girlfriend (maybe first time 😝)

->Rambles about his nerd shit to you every time

-> Gives you cringy ass nicknames fsfs

->Not a big fan of physical touch. Favors quality time more.

->You bought him one Marvel comic once and he went crazy! Like non-stop "thank you"s and "I love you"s

->Super open on you getting into karate. Thinks that you guys can train together like superheroes

-> Bought matching costumes/cosplays for Halloween.

->Jealousy levels 6/10: He easily gets jealous but calms down because he doesn't want to be so controlling. He doesn't want you to feel like you can't be friends with guys.

-> When it does come to PDA- like Miguel, he asks before he touches you (that sounded weird I'm sorry). His palms get really sweaty every time he holds your hand but you don't care.

->You used to have a big crush on Hawk before liking Demetri but when Demetri got his arm broken, you quickly realized how much of a jerk Hawk was. With a lot of quality time with Demetri, you slowly fell for him.

a/n: Flare (@miguelnation) suggested that I should write a !baristia Demetri x Reader.... it's in the works (trust) Also I'm debating if I should like yk write a kinktober fanfic but ill make a poll for that 😭

ON THE CONTRARY OF THAT ONE ASK—

Comically tall m!soc with the gang?? M!soc is one of the only nice socs and is pretty polite (bro was raised in a hella dysfunctional family but they had manners)

lowkey a pussy. Cannot fight for the life of him and has chronic back issues from how often he slouches to make himself less intimidating. He actually rlly likes poetry too, and tries to bond with pony over it (he fails. Miserably)

Honestly a beanpole. Mans is all height, no width. Roughly 6’4 if you want a proper visual

LMAO I LOVE THIS YAS ANONthis is gonna be hilarious (why is this loser my type)

Tall Wimpy M!Soc x The Gang + Shepard Boys

Ponyboy Curtis

-I don’t feel like he’s really decided how he feels about you

-Like he appreciates you trying to bond with him

-but he cringes when he looks back on that memory

-he does think it’s kind of funny that you’re so scary but you’re an absolute wimp

-Teases you about whenever you ran away, screaming from a rumble

-I feel like the gang would’ve kind of picked on him at first, but then kind of grown to like him because of how polite he is

Johnny Cade

-man, you’re so not tough

-he thinks it’s nice that you’re so polite

-you’re kind of the gang‘s pet in like a different way than him

-The gang knows that Johnny can hold his own if needed

-You legitimately need protection from like almost everything

-I think you are kind of funny together because Johnny is more small but better than you and you look tougher but you’re not

Sodapop Curtis

-he’s also generally polite

-And admires the fact you’re a Soc

-And not stuck up

-sure maybe you’re a bit wimpy and can’t fight for shit

-but hey, at least you’re baseline polite

-he would use you as a human body shield in a rumble though

Darry Curtis

-I honestly don’t think he can stand you

-I don’t know why I just think that he doesn’t.

-He just can’t stand people like you.

-he doesn’t understand how someone of your size could possibly not fight to their advantage

-because when you’re a greaser you take every little bit and scrap that can be used to your advantage

-so we can’t comprehend how you aren’t doing that

-Then again, he didn’t grow up as privileged as you

Dallas Winston

-he just thinks your existence is hilarious

-Probably just laughs at you💀

-Picks on you the hardest side of the gang

Two Bit Mathews

-“Hey, how’s the weather up there big guy?”

-“Can you kiss the moon for me?”

-“ Yeah, you could climb Mount Everest in two steps”

-“ Did ya have fun chasing Jack down the beanstalk?”

-and as soon as he finds out how much of a wimp you are

-you know he’s making fun of that too

-“Careful, don’t punch him. He’ll fall over like a pencil”

-“ Careful running sweetheart the stick that keeps you standing straight might fall outta your ass.”

-he never lets you live it down whenever you run away from a rumble screaming

Steve Randle

-like Darry I feel like he’s also a little bit annoyed at you

-Doesn’t really understand you

-but also like sodapop he’s definitely using you as a human body shield

-he’s kind of coldly neutral around you

Tim Shepard

-pretty similar to Dallas

-He doesn’t really care that much about you

-but if you guys grow to become friends, he would protect you

Curly Shepard

-based on how he kind of likes picking on anyone who is below him to make himself feel bigger in canon

-I’m guessing he’s probably beat you up before and you two aren’t on talking terms

-Gets really mad when you’ve managed to outrun him

Aran Ryan fanbase headcanons -RESULTS-

Finally! These are the results! I hope you had fun doing that! Comment or repost with your opinion, memes, drawings about it! See ya next survey!

Mod LL

What do you think about Aran Ryan?

35%: The comic relief of Punch Out wii: he can be crazy and stuff but he makes you laugh hard

35%: Even if he can act tough, he is also a funny guy

Can Aran have romantic relationships?

45%: Yes, and oddly he doesn't "cheat" in this filed!

Are Aran Ryan from the Wii and Aran Ryan from the SNES the same person?

40%: Yes, Snes! Aran was him before snapping

Does Aran have a sister?

Yep! Baby sister named Daisy who plays Rugby

i'd like to think so! i imagine she's his little sister for some reason

He has multiple younger sisters

Yes, one younger sister

He must have one.

she has one to me, a younger one :3

YES!

Yes, and an older sister at it

Yes, and I like to think she's a lot younger than him for full big bro energy. She's just as crazy as him, though.

Yes. She hits harder than you, boy!

Yes!

yes, and a brother. he’s the eldest of three children

Ye

yeah

Yes, I’m thinking she’d be about 9 to 12? I like Headcannoning that Arans sister would stay up at night until aran comes home from the pub to see if he’s okay 👍

Ermmm of course?

yes, a younger one

Yes

Yes!

Yes, I think I gave her the name Aisling in my hcs

Why is Aran "obsessed" with cheeseburger? H3talia cannot be a "real" answer!!! (But you can write it if ya want lol)

Just finds it a fun insult for the Americans but also he had one cheeseburger and it was the shittest one so he uses to call someone shit

oh i just assumed it was a dig at little mac being american? because haha america and burgers and all that. is he obsessed with them? interesting...

Not obsessed, but definitely likes them

He came to America and first food was cheeseburgers.

Stereotypes.

i know what u did here (its me *** LMAO) he just likes to bully mac >:)

YES!!!

Simple, Little Mac is called Little Mac, and McDonald's has the Big Mac. He connected the dots and now it's his most iconic line.

He…likes cheeseburgers? Yum yum!

I wouldn’t say he’s obsessed per say, just ragging on American’s with the stereotype that we all just eat junk food. (I also headcanon that he actually likes cheeseburgers, but tries not to let anyone see him eat them.)

idk

MACdonalds (funny)

that’s what he thinks of the us

I’d think that’s like his #1 insult of all time, either calling them a legitimate cheeseburger, or telling them they hit as hard as a cheeseburger being thrown as someone

Big Mac Little Mac haha get it

no, but why's that an answer???

He gets hungry a lot ):

Wait has someone actually thought Hetalia was a genuine answer or something this is extremely worrying

Teehee funny American joke

About you! What is your main fandom?

PUNCH OUT!! :D

it is a mystery...

punch out

Punch out and Super Mario

tekken, sailor moon, tomb raider aside from po

Punch-Out!!

Currently Pokemon, but feel free to ask me about Punch Out!!

Punch out at the present moment.

I have many but it’s def the Beatles. Currently it’s Ted Lasso

I started out in the FNAF fandom as a kid and it’s had a ton to do with me and my art since lol.

currently punch-out lol

Super pumch iut

punch-out!! and k-pop

PUNCH OUT OFC

Team Fortress 2 teehee

currently my main fandom is super mario!!

Touhou!!!

PO!!

Either Puyo Puyo or Pokémon

Is Aran your fav one from PO and in general of all the fandoms you are in?

66,7%: No, only in PO

Silly question: why does Aran draw with a paintbrush???? Why didn't he use a pen or something like a normal person? Or just destroy Little Mac like Don Flamenco did?

30%: Because he has always weird stuff with him

Did Aran finish school?

No but he went back to school as a Mature Student and is doing some study

hmm... maybe. (cop-out answer lol)

Nope, only finished up to middle school

No,

Pretty sure he did, but it was torture for him:

good question, maybe he did "ok"

Somehow yes

Probably

I think so. He used to be sane until he realized the potential for cheating there was in the WVBA

Maybe

Assuming that him and SNES are the same person, I think he did but it was very rocky due to growing teen angst because of the bullying he faced.

he probably finished high school

He seems like the type of person to draw comically bad stick figure portraits so no

he did because of his mama

He’d probably drop out, or get expelled for beating up too many people, I guess his mum just didn’t look for anymore schools after that

prob not, maybe homeschooled?

Lel yeah

Yes but he didn't care much for it, and he hardly thinks back to it as well.

Yeah, had no interest in college though

Your Aran Ryan OTP is...

40%: Aran Ryan x canon

Which are Aran's friends inside the WVBA? (OCs are good too)

Disco, Don, Hugger, Tiger, Mac, Bull and Soda

i honestly don't think he'd consider any of them his friends. he's very hard to get close to that way (not IMPOSSIBLE but... hard)

The entire world circuit and masked muscle at least

Soda (I ship him and Aran), Tiger, Bald the Bull and SMM.

SP is his good drinking buddy! But guess that's about it.

narcis is not only his bf in my canon but also his BFF, other than that disco and maybe heike, some fellas he met in ireland-

Mad clown and Masked Musle

Soda Popinski, Some of my OCs (Ikari (I haven't talked about her), Polar (mischief makers, haven't talked about her), Playmaker (would record pranks/prank each other))

Glass Joe, Piston Hondo, maybe Don Flamenco and Carmen, maybe Little Mac

Narcis (even more than), Don, Disco, Heike, Mr. Sandman, I’d even say he’s friendly with Mac too.

My mind flip flops between him either being good friends with some of the boxers or the other boxers warning everyone else that he’s a dangerous nutcase. (He can be, but it’s not his entire personality.)

don flamenco (rivals to lovers hehe), piston hondo, great tiger, soda popinski (drinking buddies lol)

I think aran and heilke could be friends

quite literally everyone in the wvba lmao

Hes definitely got lads outside of the WVBA but if we’re talking just inside the WVBA, I’ve got a feeling that hardly anymore wants to mess or talk with Aran but if I had to choose I’d probably say Don Flamenco, they fought eachother before so I guess they spoke more after that. Don wouldn’t really be the one to start a conversation with him at all but Aran can start up a conversation, by stealing his toupee and making him run room to room to get it making sure to let everyone see as Don chases after him, especially letting Carmen see👍

excluding ships, soda would be the closest, tho he's more of a "when things go wrong, call him" type guy. even if aran doesn't admit it, he's maybe the closest he's got to a friend. see below

Little Mac, Soda Popinski, somehow the ref

Everyone stays at least 5 feet away from him because he has rabies and he nearly bit a guy once. (I feel like he's alone by choice)

I imagine the world circuit is among his closest friends just because they’re around each other a lot, but I’m he has buddies he used to box with back in Ireland (I’d also say his sister but they grew up together so it’s bit of a given)

Can Aran Ryan have friends?

35%: Yes, but his hot head can be problematic

Does Aran have hobbies outside boxing?

Art, Rugby and Horse Riding!

probably, but good luck getting him to share what they are lol

Yes! He enjoys sculpting and painting as well as dancing and making music among other things

Ice skating and art

Drawing. I'd imagine he adores biking too.

being a bitch, motorbiking and getting caught driving too fast, pub shenanigans, pulling pranks at people he doesnt like or likes

Drawing and playing the eletric guitar

Maybe, one I can think of is tinkering (Think of him making new things to help him win)

Art, harmless pranks, rubik's cube speed solving

I can see him being into art like painting and drawing.

I definitely thinks he likes small things like video games and movies.

yes, i hc that he’s sort of an artist

not sure?

I’d think he definitely does Hurling, and is absolutely amazing at it, he doesn’t usually brag about it but does bring it up whenever he can

bar hopping. & fighting. usually one after the other

Art, gardening, punching and biting random things to see what would happen, drinking

Yes, but I feel like he keeps most of them to himself.

Traditional Irish dancing (he just pulls that shit out during title defense), he also probably draws and maybe plays an instrument

Can being bullied during school (for his name and for his mother), the cause of Aran's angry behaviour?

50% : yes

50%: sorta

Why did he started to cheat in your opinion?

42,1%: He started to cheat as everyone was "doing that" in his opinion

hello may i have a romantic mha match up plz<3

Hi my name is rex, i’m queer and use they/them pronouns and i’m 15. And i would prefer someone not over the age of 19 plz.

have like a caramel colored skin-tone (i feel like saying im black may be easier but 🤷🏽‍♀️) and im 5’3. Rn i have a purple-pink short mullet and i have pretty curly hair, im pretty chubby but i have an hourglass shape (but i have super noticeable hip dips) , i got pretty big fucking tittes (not even in a bragging way, im a fuckin k cup bro😭) and thicc thighs(thicc thighs save lives, sorry i’ll stop). I dress pretty alternative but i cant just choose one subculture tho, i wear a lot of heavy eye makeup. I could say i dress kinda “showy” but thats kinda what only fits me, but also who gives a fuck.

Honestly I don’t really have a type. Tbh most of my relationships have ended pretty badly cause they ether only wanted something sexual from me or I was “too clingy” when i just wanted basic ass affection. But the most I want is someone who is physically affectionate (like kisses, cuddles, and hugs for days) also im ok with pda to an extent like i will hug and like cuddle you but im not gonna make out with your infront of others thats weird af.

Im a libra sun, scropio moon, and gemini rising. This means that im a pretty social person and always wanna hang out with friends and just have fun, but moon in scropio makes my emotions rlly haywire and kinda boosts any sorta negative emotion, which is hard when you have chronic anxiety and major depressive disorder. Which also means i take medication for it, which i forget a lot. And because of these things i have anxiety tics, where it ranges to making noices and twitching a bit to full on hitting myself and saying random shit. But I really like making people laugh, it makes me feel helpful, but im also good at being to mother figure for people. I also like playfully bantering with people, like i love you but will full on roast you and get into fake fist-fights. I am a bit of a violent person at times but I have a punching bag and boxing gloves which help a lot. But I only get that angry when someone uses an insecurity of mine against me or is talking bad about someone i love, cause it you do that im beating your ass. I do have a bit of body insecurities mainly about my hip-dips and stomach. But because im curvy i get hit on by adults a lot and its creepy as fuck.

My hobbies include art (painting, drawing), sleeping (because i stay up mad late😭✌🏽), reading comics, Marvel and D.C superheroes, and super villains, cartoons, and anime/manga.

My favorite music genre’s are rock, alternative, emo, rap, and a little bit if indie music.

Personality: funny, sarcastic, creative, kind, inappropriate and the right times. Like im not gonna pull out a dick joke in front of your family

I don’t really have a type and im queer so i dont have a gender preference, but anyone who’s love language is physical affection cause im a clingy bitch

I have a couple ideal dates. So the first one is like an indoor picnic and a movie, an arcade date, and a stargazing date where you get take out or fast food and drive up a hill to see the stars and you like cuddle n shit.

a/n: thank you so much for this! if requests like this are long, i can work with it better!

rex has been paired up with…

— izuku midoriya

your and deku‘s song is fuyu no hanashi by given (this song omg)

(ok so listen! this man will protect you at all cost! there is no one that would fit better!)

firsts things first, he will be really smitten by the way you treat your friends and probably are a ray of sunshine in a group!

what i like the most about deku is the way he treats everyone equal. he‘d never judge you, never betray you and stand up for you!

he‘ll also be there for you. no matter what. he can take you mental health and help you overcome hard episodes.

he‘ll research everything about it, maybe even write it down and treat you right. just tell him what you need! he‘ll do it in an instant.

and if you need space, he‘ll give you that as well.

he‘d be really flustered whenever he hugs you but he gets comfortable with that pretty quickly.

he will give all the attention you need. like fr. he‘d be such a cute boyfriend!

however, putting his cute side away, he will definitely not be afraid to speak up whenever someone messes with you. he‘ll do his best to make you happy.

deku would love to read comics with you and geek about it. like that’s just how he is.

he‘d also be super flustered by your creativity. he thinks that’s extremely cool to be creative! (i do too!)

super long cuddles with him! when he is long asleep and you are still awake, just appreciating the moment!

he‘d practically go on any date with you! but of course, picnic dates are the best! it’s super cute how he prepares everything nicely.

arguments would be super rare. he just bottles some things inside that overwhelm him sometime. talking is key.

Hola Sebas! I saw that you really like the character of knuckles and amy rose, and I though...

Do you have some headcanons about them? 👀 I like to think that knuckles and amy can develop a sibling bond.

For example, knux being worried about her and even trying to protect in a sibling way during a battle.

And with amy, she would try to mock out knux in a friendly way like she did in the episode of sonic x where she was saying to him that it was obvious that knuckles was grateful for sonic's help but didn't wanted to say that to him but amy could read that in a spare of seconds

¡Hola anon!

Headcanons? Back at the start of this year I was actually working on an actual KnuxAmy oneshot lol. It was a bit of a personal experiment to try and branch out of regular ol' SonAmy content and into a different type of dynamic. A slower, more intimate one. Although it's still incomplete to this day, the main points were that after some years of relative peace in the world causing the Sonic cast to split up and do their own things, an older Amy decides to drop by Angel Island unannounced to visit the lone guardian of the Master Emerald, catch up on what they've been doing, and maybe remembering some old adventures they took part. It's meant to be a rather chill and intimate read in a post-Forces alternate continuity that takes the two of them around some beautiful vistas and secrets of Angel Island that no one but Knuckles (and maybe Sonic) knew of, while they slowly realize they might have more in common than they think. They're older, their way of understanding life is different, and so they might end up working better as "more than just friends", or at least that's what I was working toward before leaving the project sitting on my drafts haha.

As for actual headcanons, that "they might have more in common than they think" point is something I can stand by for any context, not just my self-indulgent fanfic. Alternate Sonic media like the comics have tried to develop quiet moments between them to strengthen their friendship, and it's something I can also see working as a general series headcanon. Knuckles in the main series is a bit of a wildcard, swinging between being the hot-headed Master Emerald guardian that wants to be left alone (but will chase you to the end of the world if you piss him off or steal the Emerald) in the Adventure days, and a bit of a dumb jerk as of recent games (Gens, Lost World, to some extent even Forces); and while I like both approaches, my ideal Knuckles (as I talked about him in a previous ask) has more of that SA2 Knuckles interacting with Rouge or Heroes Knuckles energy. (I like Heroes Knuckles a lot, he's as ready for adventure as he can be, and he's having lots of fun throughout.)

Anyway, yes, headcanons:

For grumpy Knuckles, the one who doesn't want to be bothered when he's on his floating island, I think Amy of all people is the one that can better connect with him; and while at first he won't let her delve too deep into his own thoughts and motivations, at the end of the day it helps him a lot to know he has a friend that understands him on a more personal level than the rest. That's not to say Sonic and Tails aren't close friends to him, but both of them are always around for adventures and kicking Eggman's ass. Sonic will never have a heart-to-heart conversation with Knuckles because that's not his style, because he understands Knuckles as is, and the only thing he want is for Knuckles to be fine and in shape for both punching shit and messing with each other. But Amy? Amy's empathy is the one key aspect that always carried her very far, and I believe she wouldn't let Knuckles walk away back to his island without talking about it, not because she wants to change him and force him to be more open, more friendly or just a completely different person, but because she wants to understand what's up with him, and reassure him that she'll always be there if he ever needs her. Of course, even if Knuckles denies it, it doesn't hurt to have someone you can chat with when the fate of the world isn't at stake. The M.E. is great and pretty shiny but I don't see it being too talkative (unless you turn it into a real character and... hooo boy that's a rabbit hole for another time.)

As for Knuckles as a jerk, yeah, I agree with both of them bantering a lot. We kinda saw that already with Sonic X, Sonic Generations and Sonic Lost World (Knuckles makes a funny comment about Sonic, Amy immediately retaliates, often with a strong shove involved lol), but I can headcanon Knuckles and Amy being complete jerks to each other. Over every other headcanon, I think this is the one with the biggest sibling energy: Knuckles is the big grumpy bro while Amy is the cheery little sister, and they both go ham having lots of fun mocking and teasing each other, laughing and then having some ice cream together or something before calling it a day. But that's exclusively their thing, do not attempt to make fun of any of them or the other one will tear you to pieces. That "knucklehead" you just mocked is Amy's big bro and if you don't apologize you'll meet her hammer head-on; and don't even get me started on what happens if you make Amy cry (heck, I can headcanon Knuckles threatening Sonic to break all his bones if he ever breaks Amy's heart lol like that "Are you playing with that girl's heart again, Sonic?" Heroes quote but now a lot more serious, haha.)

Heck, take off the KnuxAmy component of my fic and it becomes a decent sibling headcanon: Amy will visit Knuckles over at Angel Island on occasion (don't ask how she gets up there... that's part of Amy's magic), and they may or may not end up spending the entire afternoon talking about Sonic. If Knuckles ever has to come down to Station Square, I'm sure the first person he visits is going to be Amy, maybe even stick around for a cup of tea! He doesn't understand tea, though, or even the concept of a city apartment, so Amy may need some extra patience to teach him how everything works. Sonic may even show up while Amy is teaching Knuckles how to make tea, and he'll make a funny comment about him, causing Knuckles to immediately drop everything and chase after the blue blur across the city only to kick his ass.

So, in conclusion: yes, I was working on getting into older!KnuxAmy and maybe take their dynamic one step further, but for actual headcanons I can see Amy being the only one Knuckles can actually and fully trust, since she can see right through him, leading to probably one of the most solid friendships in the entire series, on the same level as Sonic-Tails, the Chaotix or Shadow-Rouge (don't kill me, shadouge fans... haha... ha.) When Knuckles is in the jerk mood the sibling energy between them goes to the moon, and leads to incredibly fun moments when they playfully mess with each other, laugh a lot and maybe Knuckles gets the chance to learn a bit more of how the world works outside of Angel Island.

More Than Meets the Eye #30 - The Cybertronian Judicial System is a Friggin’ Joke

Have I mentioned that I’m not a huge fan of court case stories? I think they’re pretty boring, on average, so the last couple of issues have been slightly dragging for me.

Anyway, back to Megatron’s trial. 

Our issue opens up with a full back shot of Ultra Magnus.

Artists take note, he really is built like a capital T.

As Magnus reads out Megatron’s statement retracting his “guilty” plea, we get some decent points as to why. See, telling a guy that you’ll stab him in the brain, so his trial can be over as quickly as possible, maybe isn’t such a hot idea. Megatron wasn’t a huge fan of that, or of how those memories they would’ve yanked outta him would have been used to fuel the Autobot propaganda machine. Why, you may ask?

Well, I don’t know if you knew this or not, but Megatron… doesn’t particularly care for the Autobots, nor the rhetoric they uphold.

I know, I was surprised too!

There’s also the fact that Optimus Prime is the judge on this whole thing. You know. Optimus Prime. Off and on leader of the Autobots, whenever it suits him. The guy who fucked off into space for a year after the war. The guy who threw a hissy fit when someone pointed out that he was compromised the last time they did something like this with Megatron. This guy:

Yeah, there might be a slight conflict of interests here. Remind me again why this had to be a military trial?

Anyway, enough of that, it’s time for a fight scene.

A swarm of Decepticons storm the arena, going after Megatron so they can help him escape. Magnus, though acting as Megatron’s defense, cannot abide by this disorder in the court.

Wild to think there’s a tiny little Pringles man with anxiety in there, isn’t it?

Optimus joins the fray, because there really are, just, so many guys to deal with here. A dude goes to collect Megatron, stating that they brought teleport packs for this little shindig. Megatron isn’t super jazzed about that though, not bothering to grab on before the dude gets shot to death. There’s a brief recess, I guess so the janitorial staff can deal with the mess of corpses littering the courtroom.

Meanwhile, in the present day, Rung’s building a model spaceship in Swerve’s, which is a very brave thing to be doing, seeing how sticky and gross bars can be. Brainstorm’s brought a flask to the bar, and proceeds to pour the contents into a funnel sticking out of his arm.

Our bartender for the evening- I’m assuming it’s evening, but I doubt the concept of time has any real weight in space- is Bluestreak. Bluestreak was stationed on Earth for a while, which is some Phase One stuff, and took a liking to human media while he was there. He’s the guy who handles movie night these days, seeing as Rewind’s too busy being dead to do it, and I doubt Chromedome has the emotional bandwidth to take over for his late spouse.

Bluestreak’s favorite movie is Zulu, a film glorifying the colonialism of the English over the native populace of an African kingdom. Make of that what you will.

Whirl wants to watch À Bout de Soufflé, or Breathless, as it was translated for the English-speaking world, which is a French New Wave film about a criminal who shoots a cop, hides from the police in a journalist’s home, who he seduces and likely impregnates. She eventually finds out what he did, reports him to the police, but then has a change of heart and lets him know what she’s done. He runs, but is shot, and dies in the street. The film is notable for its final scene, in which the following dialogue happens, between the dying criminal Michael, his lover Patricia, and an officer.

Of course, any poignancy would almost certainly be lost on the average comic book reader, and is also somewhat nullified by Whirl praising the film with internet lingo.

Then again, I suppose Whirl would be the type to dismantle any deeper reading of his interest in such a film, lest he be subjected to the horrifying ordeal of being known.

Over with Skids and Riptide, it’s revealed that Megatron’s been teaching classes on the Lost Light, specifically on the Knights of Cybertron. Riptide’s getting an education, because he’s been feeling pretty lost since the war ended- we’ll get to the potential whys of that later on. Swerve isn’t a fan of this community college thing that’s going on, stating that Megatron’s using it as a distraction, so he can devise plots most foul.

Back in the past, Autobot high command is having a talk about what Megatron’s demanding, and man is it a doozy— turns out, since the trial’s happening on Luna 2, the trial proceedings are subject to the laws of the moon. One of these moon laws is the right to request being judged by the Knights of Cybertron. Now, this is a problem, seeing as the Knights of Cybertron have been AWOL for the last several million years, but the law is the law, and you can’t just go ignoring it when someone’s pointed it out.

Bro, your SIC just suggested y’all pull the trial so you could slap it on Cybertron, thus negating any need to pay attention to the Knight law. That’s such a gross miscarrying of justice, it’s genuinely baffling. You’ve got bigger issues going on than flouting. My god, Optimus, you were a cop—

Oh wait, that’s right. Carry on, then.

Back on the Lost Light, First Aid’s checking to make sure that the coffin Rodimus they revealed last issue is true and proper dead. Now, this may seem like a given, but you’ve got to remember that Brainstorm was mostly dead for over a year and a half, and nobody fucking noticed, so it’s probably for the best that they’re checking.

First Aid’s been pretty withdrawn since Ambulon died, so this autopsy is really good for him, since it got him out of his room. Pretty fucked up that it would take a dead body to get him out and about. Has Rung checked in on his poor son of a gun, or has he been spending the last six months getting his professional rocks off psychoanalyzing a genocidal warlord?

Our coffin Rodimus died from having parts of his brain removed, and potentially died screaming.

Yes, that is a Furmanism, thank you peanut gallery, moving on—

Ratchet hands the phone over to Ultra Magnus, saying that a call has to be made, and it can’t be by him, because the callee is mighty upset with Ratchet at the moment.

Oh, I guess he’s fine after all. This must be where the sci-fi bullshit really starts kicking in for the series.

Because seeing your own dead body is likely very traumatic and awful, Rodimus is taking a while to string together his thoughts on the matter. Megatron doesn’t particularly care, because he’s not terribly sympathetic to this sort of thing, and the two get into a spat, where it’s revealed that they’re co-captaining the Lost Light.

Because things weren’t chaotic enough on this fucking ship. Need to mix in some peacocking between the McDonalds twunk and the man who killed half of Beijing.

Back in the past, Optimus Prime visited Megatron in prison to have a little chat. It’s not about that little rescue attempt, though the fact that those Decepticons may have been released from the Lost Light’s brig is certainly interesting. No, Optimus is here to sit way too close to his mortal nemesis on the floor of his room and talk about how Megatron is a sneaky bastard.

You remember the Hellraiser puzzle box from a couple issues back? Yeah, that was a communicube, one that was passed to Optimus to suggest that the trial be held on the moon, so the arena there would be able to hold all the people wronged by Megatron. This seems pretty damn convenient in hindsight, but Megatron swears that the legal loophole wasn’t his only intent when he sent the cube.

Because it’s all about you, isn’t it, Megatron? It’s all about how you’re perceived by future generations. Fuck the guys who had to actually deal with what your personal choices caused to happen.

Megatron wants to make amends with all those who were wronged by him. This doesn’t include being acquitted of his crimes, which, y’know, good- at least he’s being slightly realistic about how this is going to turn out for him.

What he wants to do is find Cyberutopia, so the Cybertronians have a replacement planet, since Cybertron kind of sucks now.

Oh, sorry, did I say realistic? I take it back.

In the present, Rodimus is still bummed out about being dead. Still, the day doesn’t stop just because it’s a bad one, and he calls in the experts.

CHROMEDOME YOU PROMISED TO STOP THIS SHIT

Yeah, no, Chromedome’s fallen off the wagon again, and does his thing on the coffin Rodimus. As he does, Megatron suddenly gets squeamish, Brainstorm pulls out his early early-warning device to lean on the fourth wall, and it’s revealed that the coffin that coffin Rodimus was in was built in the fashion of the Spectralist faith.

All Chromedome can suss out of coffin Rodimus’ memories is the really big important stuff, which includes the speech at Rivet’s Field inviting folks to come join the Knight Quest. Aww, that’s sweet.

With the analysis of the innermost energon complete, the results are in— the coffin Rodimus is a Rodimus. A real one, from the near future. Bummer.

I suppose denial is one of the seven stages of grief, isn’t it?

As everyone argues over whether or not Rodimus is going to die, Nightbeat brings up a good point— there aren’t any numbers carved into the coffin Rodimus’ hand. Rodimus is about to reveal some Ratchet-original wisdom, when things start getting really weird; whole sections of the Lost Light are disappearing.

Over at Swerve’s, Tailgate is regaling his peers with the story of his derring-do against Chief Justice Tyrest. Everyone is very impressed, and this includes our good buddy Getaway.

Jeez, think you’ve got enough antagonist shadows on this guy? It’s almost as if the art’s trying to tell us something about him.

Getaway lays it on real thick, saying that Tailgate could totally be the next Prime, with how courageous and awesome he is, all while completely ignoring Tailgate’s personal space and having a weirdly tiny hand. This seems to seriously bother Cyclonus, who is watching this shit go down from the doorway. Our purple space jet leaves once the drinks start being poured and conversation starts happening. God knows he hates talking about his insecurities.

Then the Pipes is Friggin’ Dead alarm goes off. But Pipes has been dead for a while now, so that must mean something else awful is happening.

Back during the trial, I guess because Optimus has a soft spot for Megatron, he allows him to join the Lost Light’s Knight Quest… even as he says that he could keep the guy locked up until Rodimus and pals find the Knights. However, there are rules to this, and one of the rules is that Megatron must publicly denounce the Decepticon cause.

It is a slow and painful experience for everyone involved, as he reads the statement he was given. It’s an immediate call to action- or rather, inaction.

Geez, think they could’ve made it any more obvious that this was being ghostwritten? I can’t wait to see how long it takes for “Megatron was blackmailed into saying this by the Autobots” to be a plotpoint.

Outside the prison, Ratchet and Rodimus are taking in the brand new Rod Pod, which is genuinely ridiculous in how large it is. Rodimus admits to having taken Atomizer’s list, though he knows that trying to use it to keep those who voted him off would be a pretty shitty thing to do.

Also, no one’s told him about Megatron coming along on the trip. As captain.

Or you could, I dunno, lock him up from the start. Or, if you want to give him a chance to prove himself, slap him into a bottom-rung role, like bilge cleaner, or sewage mucker, or whatever the equivalent would be on a spaceship full of giant gay robots. We don’t have to give the guy any power to hold him to scrutiny— any minimum wage worker will tell you that scrutiny comes far harsher for those who actually carry out orders than those who give them.

But what do I know? I’ve never fought in a several million year war, and I don’t plan to.

Getting back to the list, it seems as if Ratchet and Rodimus are on the same wavelength, in that both agree it’s only going to cause trouble and hurt feelings to keep the thing around. Rodimus destroys it with his usual flare, only to be blindsided by the fact that it was fake this entire time. How does Ratchet know this?

Because his name wasn’t on it.

...Man, that’s gotta sting. No wonder Rodimus was upset enough to not take his calls.

In the present, everyone’s in a panic, as they all bolt for the shuttle bay and start pouring into shuttles. The Lost Light is disintegrating around them, which is sort of a problem. Despite this nightmare scenario happening, Rodimus and Megatron still find the time to be assholes to each other. That’s dedication right there.

As the two bicker, multiple shuttles zip away from the rapidly disappearing ship, including the Rod Pod.

Man, now it really is the Lost Light.

Sugar and Coffee [8]

Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9

➜ Words: 3.3k

➜ Genres: 99.5% Fluff, 0.5% Angst, Pâtisserie school!AU

➜ Summary: It isn't hard to be a pâtisserie chef, but it's not a piece of cake either. It seems like for you in particular, life keeps throwing in one wrench after another. It always finds ways to make your sweets bitter. The cherry on top is Jeon Jungkook — a rival with a sensitive sweet tooth who always finds ways to complain about you.

cr.

You always thought you would be happy to see him again.   To come face to face with the man who you miss the most — who you’ve yearned to see so much. Like reuniting with a close friend who you’ve lost contact with. Like rediscovering a piece of yourself that you had lost.   But you didn’t know it would be so painful. That your heart would be so heavy.   “H-hey.”   “Hey.” Seokjin smiles and your heart stutters but then constricts. It’s hard to breathe. “Are you on your way to class?”   You hold your books closer to your chest as if they could do anything to protect you. Your eyes sweeping over his features, trying to freshen your memories of him. You can’t recall the last time you heard the sound of his voice. “Y-Yeah. Are you?”   “I’m on my way to the library to meet up with some people for a group project,” he says casually with a good-natured smile.   “Oh. A group project already?”   “Yeah, I know right.” Jin sighs lightly, lips falling into a slight pout. “Well it’s my last ever semester, so it’s the last push.”   “Totally. I...get it.”   “I should go now before I’m late. It was nice seeing you, Y/N.”   You nod and without waiting a beat, he brushes past you, continuing down the hall.   You hate it. The way he looked at you, talked to you so nonchalantly, how he didn’t even blink thrice. Jin was friendly, but you know him — and he treated you the way he treats strangers. There weren't any softened gazes, gentle words. None of his actions had a trace of lingering feelings. His polite smile is the same one that’s reserved for mere acquaintances. Distant.   You’re no less than a stranger to him.   And as you watch Jin’s backside fading down the corridor, you quickly wipe away the tears that shed down your cheeks.   //   “You ran into him?”   You nod, toying with the hem of your sweater.   “That’s great news,” Jungkook murmurs from the corner of his mouth, preoccupied with choosing a game.   “Yeah, I know, right?” You're stiff, but he doesn't pay enough attention to notice.   You’re sitting on the floor of Jungkook’s dorm room, knees gathered together as you watch him set up. He’s finally cleaned up after you insulted him that he was a pig living in a pigsty, and he was offended enough to clean up after himself and do his laundry.   Jungkook switches on his PS4 and flops down on his small couch with the controller. He glances up at you when there’s ongoing silence and realizes he should say something more.   “That means there’s hope, right? If he’s willing to talk to you and all. I know a lot of exes who would run in the other direction.”   “Yeah. That’s true, I guess.”   Jungkook is optimistic. “If you keep talking to him, who knows, you might get back together before you even realize.”   There’s a loud knock on the door, someone’s fist banging on the surface. The boy in his gray sweatpants and black, boxy shirt sighs, gets up and opens the door. The person on the other side glares at him. “Dude, about fucking time. Was standing out there for an eternity.”   “Shut up, I literally took ten seconds.”   “Yea, but ten seconds we could’ve used playing. Hey, Y/N!” Hoseok grins, plopping down on the couch and stealing Jungkook’s controller. Jimin follows in, greeting you with a smile, and Taehyung and Yoongi are the last with the former harshly nudging the latter forward.   “Alright, alright,” Yoongi grunts quietly and then faces you with his hands dug into his hoodie pocket. “Y/N. I wanted to apologize for my behaviour last time.” He looks less sorry and more disgruntled and reluctant, but it’s enough to amuse you.   You snort. “It’s no big deal.”   “Okay, cool.” Yoongi exhales and sits beside you.   Taehyung shakes his head but redirects his attention to Jimin when he steals his favourite controller. “Hey, hey, hey, paws off, bro.”   “What?”   “That’s mine.”   “Who says?”   “I wrote my name at the back in pencil. Look. See?”   “You wrote on my controller?” Jungkook is outraged, snapping into their argument.   In the meanwhile, Yoongi scrolls through his phone and notices you’re blankly staring at Jungkook's old flat screen — the one he stole from his parent’s home months ago and somehow set it up here. “I meant it.”   “What?”   “I know it looked like Taehyung made me,” Yoongi mumbles, “Which he did. But I meant to apologize anyway. Eventually. I know I’m an ass.”   “You’re an honest one,” you admit with a small smile. If there was anyone who was going to be frank and truthful, it would be Yoongi. He won’t sugar coat it, won’t string pretty words together to make you feel better, so that’s why you pick him to inquire, “Can I ask you a question, Yoongi?”   “Sure.”   “Do you think I’ll ever be able to get back together with Jin?”   “No.” His gaze connects with yours. “You won’t. Usually people break up for a reason and that reason always stands.”

Two weeks pass by as you ignore the thoughts lingering in the back of your mind. You overlook it like an assignment on your desk that needs to be done or like that messy drawer you should clean out but keep procrastinating on. And it’s easy to distract yourself when the entire school is stirred.   Of course it would be. After all, the most competitive holiday was coming up.   “What are you going to make for Valentines?”   “Me?” You blink. “I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it yet….”   The atmosphere hyped — even the dining hall is louder, the air buzzing.   The holiday simply dedicated to love has long been replaced by alumni years ago and became a competition. After all, this was the place where everyone could make sweets after all. No longer was Valentine chocolates simply melting chocolate from the store and pouring them into molds — every single person here can properly judge the quality, taste, texture, flavour, and the presentation.   According to rumours, the tradition started between three people, specifically when a girl told her two potential suitors that she would become the Valentine of whoever baked better. It sounds like some ridiculous Shakespearean tragedy, but as people went head to head to win the affections of their crushes — it essentially evolved into a competition.   And at this point, it doesn’t matter who gives it to who. It’s who bakes it better.   “I’m still debating if I want to do raspberry possets or raspberry religieuse,” Taehyung hums, chin resting in his propped up hand, and he turns to his side. “Which one do you like, Yoongi?”   “Why the fuck do you care what I like?”   “Well obviously because I’m going to make it for you,” he giggles.   Yoongi glares. “Fuck off.”   “Who else am I supposed to give it to? You have no one, I have no one.”   “What about Jimin?” you ask, trying to hold back laughter with said brunette.   “He has his mom.”   “Hey,” Jimin whines, “I have the Valentine’s Day fundraiser at the hospital this year too.”   “So you’re not going to make anything for your mom?” he deadpans.   “Well, no.” Jimin pouts. “I’m going to make her red velvet cupcakes.”   “Don’t make fun of him,” you chide Taehyung and turn to the other. “That’s really cute, Jimin.”   Jimin grins, eyes crinkling into half moons. “Don’t worry, Taehyung can say whatever he wants. He’s just jealous my mom’s the best. She raised me all on her own and I wouldn’t be here without her.”   “Okay, I’ll admit she’s really nice,” Taehyung has a dreamy expression. “I miss her warm hugs.”   “That’s weird,” Jimin deadpans, pleasant smile switching into a face of comical disgust. “Don’t talk about my mom like that, dude.”   You laugh and look over at the sleepy man lazily chewing on his mac and cheese. It’s always funny to watch Yoongi eat. He looks physically pained to chew and swallow — you wonder if he would blend all of his food to just drink it if he could. “Are you going to make anything, Yoongi?”   “No. Who would I give it to?” He ignores Taehyung when he exclaims ‘me’.   You direct your attention to Hoseok and he shrugs. “I might...make lemon and poppy seed cupcakes or strawberry rhubarb shortbread bars.”   “For who?” Jungkook asks, brows raised.   “Uh, no one.” But it’s obvious that the answer is too suspicious, so he gives in with a sigh. “I owe Y/N’s friend, Aeri, a favour, so I’ll probably make something for her.”   “Ooh, I haven’t heard you talk about Y/N’s friend before.” Taehyung leans in closer, eyes glistening.   “Shut up,” Hoseok quips. “What about you, Y/N?”   “I...haven’t decided if I will or not. Maybe I’ll make something for Jin.”   Yoongi’s eyes flicker up, brow cocking, and you stare back at him blankly.   Jimin catches the quick exchange and intercepts. “You should tell Jungkook to make you his chocolate-covered strawberry cupcakes.”   “Holy fuck, I remember those!” Taehyung slaps the table, startling both you and Jungkook. “Those was so fucking delicious, I thought I was going to cream my pants when I ate them. I can still taste it.” He slurps up the spit that’s accumulated in his mouth.   Jungkook’s nose wrinkles. “No. It’s too much work to make that.”   Taehyung bats his lashes. “You wouldn’t make it for us?”    “That’s an even harder no.”   “Psh. Valentine’s Day hater.”   “Fuck off. It’s not my fault that the holiday is stupid.”   “You just hate it because you’re alone.” You pat your friend on the back. “It’s okay, Jungkook. You’ll find love someday.”   “Okay, fuck you too,” he spits without much malice, making Yoongi smirk.   “Jungkook just knows his small package can’t satisfy any man or woman.”   Yoongi’s insult rouses laughter from everyone and the man being grilled has his brows shot to his hairline. “For your information, I have a substantial size and I’m probably bigger than everyone here. Especially you, Mr. five foot nine.”   You blanch. “Gross.”    But while Yoongi doesn’t seem injured by the retort, Jimin’s the one who’s sitting straight and he whines, “Why do you have to bring height into this?”   They ignore him in favour of Taehyung’s questioning, “Really? Bigger than everyone here?”   “Okay fine.” Jungkook points at Taehyung. “Except you.”   You look between the pair of them. “Did you guys have a dick measuring contest or what?”   “We will not speak of the past,” Jungkook deadpans, making you laugh even more.   //   You know that you shouldn’t. With what Yoongi’s told you, with what you know yourself, you shouldn’t go out of your way to do something so unnecessary. You shouldn’t put your heart on your sleeve to get hurt again when it’s not going to be worth it. But in your life, there've been a thousand shouldn’ts and you’ve always grasped onto the one should.   It never hurts you to try, and that’s how you’ve made it this far.   “Hey, Jeon.” You catch up to him. Jungkook’s legs are unbearably longer than yours and when he walks fast it puts you out of breath within seconds.    Luckily, he sees you and has the decency to slow down. “What?”   “I need your help.” Jungkook’s steps slow even more until he outright stops in the middle of the hallway. He looks so apprehensive, you have an urge to slap that expression off his face. “Hey! It’s not like I’m not going to ask you to kill someone for me!”   “Yeah, well, the last time you asked for a favour, we destroyed a kitchen trying to temper chocolate. I’d rather you kill me, thank you very much.”   “Pretty please? Promise it’s not bad.”   “Ew, ew. Don’t look at me like that and stop pouting, you’re not cute.”   You frown at him. “Look it’s not a huge, huge thing, promise.”   “What is it?”   “Well, you’re Jungkook, World’s Best Chocolatier, right?” You nudge him with your elbow and it only makes him more suspicious with how you’re thickly laying down the praise. “And you know chocolate hates me. I definitely don’t know about it as well as you do either, so I need you to bestow your gifts onto me—”   “What is it, lady? Get a move on! I don’t have all day.”   “Can you help me make something for Jin?”   Jungkook pauses. He stares at you. Maybe his brain finally died — not like there is anything to die considering it’s always been a little on the empty side. But then he finally opens his mouth. “What are you planning?”   “Just something simple. Like truffles. What do you think?”   Jungkook hesitates, then he looks at you. “Fine.”   “Really?”   “Yeah, yeah.”   He waves his hand away, but you grin at him. “You know you’re my best friend, right, Jungkook?”   “Yeah, well, it’s something I never really signed up for,” your best friend mutters and continues walking while telling you that you’ll owe him and that means more notes from multiple lectures. But it’s worth it.   On the fourteenth, right on Valentine’s Day, you meet with Jungkook.   He audibly sighs when he sees you tie up the back of your apron. “What?”   “Nothing. I just can’t believe I’m spending Valentine’s with you.”   “I thought you didn’t care about the holiday.”   “I don’t. But that still doesn’t mean this isn’t lame. Whatever. The quicker we get this done, the quicker I can leave and avoid all this.” He motions around, but you know what he means.   Love is in the air and it’s sickening — couples were holding hands, kissing each other on the tips of their noses, rubbing their cheeks against one another, dialing up the PDA to an uncomfortable amount. But you can’t blame them. You and Seokjin were once like that.   “Do you know how to make ganache?”   “Do I know how to make ganache,” you mimic him mockingly. “Of course I do! What am I, an idiot?!”   “Well, you didn’t know how to temper chocolate so you tell me.”   You glare at him. You would mouth off but can’t risk him storming out.   The two of you gather the eight ounce semi-sweet chocolate, a half cup of whipping cream, cocoa powder and some vanilla. Jungkook helps you heat the cream to a simmer in a small saucepan, looking over your shoulder at every step along the way. While you’d usually mind the way he’s intruding in your personal bubble, you don’t want to get anything wrong.   “Make sure it doesn’t burn.”   “It’s not going to burn.”   “You said that last time.”   You snap. “Keep bringing up last time and this will be the last time you step into the kitchen, Jeon.” A second later, you’re begging Jungkook not to leave. But thankfully, he has enough mercy and lets you off with a warning.   The pair of you continue making the ganache, placing the chocolate in a bowl before pouring the cream and adding the vanilla to it. You allow it to stand for a few minutes before stirring it into a smooth, deep mixture.   You place the ganache in the fridge for half an hour to chill. In the meanwhile, you clean up the mess and wash whatever dishes you have. Jungkook, on the other hand, shows you Yoongi’s reaction of Taehyung proposing to him with some cupcakes in front of campus in which the former man straight out walks away.    Jimin who’s filming is giggling hard enough that the camera is unsteady, but his laughter is infectious and makes the both of you grin. Jungkook says he’s glad he wasn’t there lest Taehyung turned to him and started to declare his fake affections and cause a crowd to gather. Apparently it’s happened before.   When the ganache is ready, Jungkook helps you roll it into balls and dust with cocoa powder. You pull out a box you had prepared to place them in, and you could not be prouder when it’s complete.   It looks like a product that you could buy in-store. Simple yet elegant.   “All done.”   “All done,” you repeat after him, viewing your final product. Chocolate doesn’t hate you so much when you’re with Jungkook, you realize.   “He’ll love it.”   “Yeah….”   You can imagine it — calling out Jin’s name. He’d spin around, regard you with his surprise. You’d extend your arms to give him the box. You’d try to show through this small gesture that you still love him, but you wouldn’t speak the words in case the moment would be ruined. But with your courage mustered, you’d tell him that you miss him in your life. That you don’t want to be strangers anymore. Whether that means remaining friends or being lovers again.   But you know that it’s just your fantasy.   A delusion — your optimistic imagination running wild with the semblances of hope still left within you. A sweet dream you would have in your slumber only to wake up to reality. The grief of your heartbreak morphed into a wishful thinking. The image and scenario you’ve constructed in your mind is simply part of a chapter in your life that would never happen.   “He wouldn’t take it,” you whisper.    It's a truth that’s hard to face, that you’ve been running from and turning yourself blind to.    But you know Seokjin. After nearly two years together, you know the kind of polite smile he gives to strangers. You know how he treats acquaintances. You know when he’s being distant, how he acts when things don’t matter to him anymore. And you know that— “He wouldn’t….”   He would never take this.    He would never accept the chocolates you’ve made on Valentine’s. You would never be able to muster the courage to tell him how much you miss him. And he would never agree to being friends after your extensive history together.    Your head lowers, and tears drip down your cheeks. Jungkook is rendered speechless but you feel his hand on your shoulder. He squeezes comfortingly.   You sniffle, wiping your face with the back of your hand, and you take a truffle to throw into your mouth. You chew in your cheek and look at Jungkook with your reddened, teary eyes. “I-If he won’t eat it, we should.”   That’s how you end up on the floor of the kitchen with Jungkook beside you.    The two of you are leaning against the kitchen island, hidden away from the window of the door and any intrusive eyes peering through. The tips of your fingers are stained with melted chocolate — the fruits of your labour gone in an instant.   The realization sinks in. After months of what you’ve tried to keep a hold on it. Having hoped aimlessly that you could change this back around. What had shattered into sand and slipped between your fingertips, but you tried to catch it again. It hits you in an instant.    Harder than it ever has.   “It’s really over, isn’t it, Jungkook?” you ask in a murmur, in a broken voice. “It’s over.”   The relationship ended. Any form of a relationship with Seokjin is gone forevermore.   Jungkook turns his head, gazing at your profile. He pats you on the back.   He’s learnt long ago that he wasn’t very good at speaking, but that his words don’t mean as much as his actions do.   So in silence, Jungkook eats the truffles with you. It’s not bad, he muses internally. You’re getting better at chocolate despite how you never had a knack for it. Well, technically he made them but whatever, your effort still means something.   He chews and keeps to himself how the chocolate truffle strangely tastes sweet and bitter, like both sugar and black coffee.

Saw this video game tag thing pop up on my dash a few days ago. Wanted to do it.

1. First game you played obsessively? Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, I believe I was 5yo. Still waiting on that FF7 Remake treatment.

2. A game that has influenced you creatively? Writing, drawing, etc. Well if I play a game and like it, then I'll create sims of it. Does that count?

3. Who did you play with as a kid? My brother from the day I was born.

4. Who do you play with now? My brother FROM THE DAY I WAS BORN.

5. Ever use cheat codes? I wasn't lying when I made this post. {link}

6. Ever buy strategy guides? Yes! Mainly to look at the artwork though. (Don't need no guide!)

7. Any games you have multiple copies of? Lots of games, most being Left 4 Dead with 6 copies (3 Xbox 360, 1 PC case, 2 PC digitally.) What can I say, its a GOOD GAME!

8. Rarest/Most expensive game in your collection? Gold cartridge Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time (maybe that's rare?)

9. Most regrettable purchase? I don't regret my purchases, but I have received games I have never played like Cubix (PS2) no clue where that game came from, but I have it somehow. Madagascar (Xbox 360) came with my Xbox 360, never opened it from its case. And Monsters Inc. Scream Arena (Gamecube) or something... it was a gift.

10. Ever go to a midnight game release or stand in line for hours? No, because then I'd have to interact with people.

11. Have you ever made new friends from playing video games? I'm only friends with people BECAUSE of video games, so yes.

12. Ever get picked on for liking games? No, that'd be ridiculous.

13. A game you’ve never played that everyone else has? Probably a lot, I'd say Call of Duty, but I technically played CoD 1, 2, and 4. The campaign mode was alright, but I don't really care for CoD games at ALL.

14. Favorite game music? Koji Kondo and Grant Kirkhope are two BIG ones.

15. If it was a requirement to get a game related tattoo, what would you pick? Triforce is the most basic option, but I'd rather not get a tattoo.

16. Favorite game to play with your friends IRL? Super Smash Bros. Brawl with hacks, but that was over a decade ago.

17. Ever lose a friend over a game? No, that'd be ridiculous.

18. Would you date someone that hates gaming? No, that'd be RIDICULOUS.

19. Favorite handheld console? PSP. 3DS is great, but PSP Monster Hunter has ALL of my portable gaming memories. Like playing in school after End of Grade tests with my friend.

20. Game that you know like the back of your hand? Sims 4 I like to think I know everything about Left 4 Dead. Quite a bit about Monster Hunter, more so of a series though than a specific game.

21. Game that you didn’t like or understand as a kid but love now? I'd say Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic. I loved it as a kid, but had a lot of complex pen & paper RPG mechanics that I never understood. I understand a lot more of it now, but its still complex as all heck. I just know you hit things, they die.

22. Do you wear game related clothing/accessories? That's the only thing I wear.

23. The game that you’ve logged the most hours into? Not sure so I'll list a few. Sims 4, Smash Bros. Brawl, Monster Hunter (its a series though), or Left 4 Dead

24. First Pokemon game? Leaf Green

25. Were you ever an arcade game player? No, don't like paying to play.

26. Ever form any gaming rivalries? No.

27. Game that makes you rage? I don't get mad at games, but I had a custom modded Hard Eight mutation in Left 4 Dead that is absolute bullsh*t!

28. Ever play in a tournament? No, because then I'd have to interact with people.

29. What is your gaming set up? A giant wall of video game consoles spanning from NES to Switch, 4 TVs, but I sit at a desk with a PC.

30. How many consoles do you own? "I own every console that's ever existed." - I Don't Play Games When I Play Games (My STRENTH) original song by Smooth McGroove BUT no seriously I own 32 consoles including handhelds.

31. Does the 3DS and/or Virtual Boy hurt your eyes or give you headaches? Yes. 3DS gave me headaches though I only really played with the 3D feature in Ocarina of Time 3D. I think my eyes broke because I couldn't get my 3D to work very well after.

32. Did you ever play a game based on your favorite show/cartoon/movie/comic? Sure I play games based on a lot of things. Literally any anime game. If I had to pick Dragon Ball Xenoverse is kinda like a dream Dragon Ball game. Oh, Attack on Titan 2 is pretty neat too!

33. Did you ever have any bootleg games or plug-n-play games? Some SEGA plug-n-play thing once. Played it like once and now its lost to time (or my closet.)

34. Do either of your parents play video games? Yes. Mom and Dad played NES Super Mario Bros. My Dad went HARD at that game until he saved the Princess. Then he quit forever.

35. Ever work in a game store? Or do you have a favorite game shop? "Hi. Welcome to Gamestop!"I never want to hear that again, but it was my main store until I went full digital/ online orders.

36. Have you ever shed actual blood, sweat or tears over a game? No, I don't tend to get upset or emotional, but Bill dying in Left 4 Dead made me pretty pissed.

37. Have you played E.T. for the Atari 2600? Do you think that’s the worst game ever, or do you have another nomination? Never played it. I don't really play "bad" games, but maybe Sims 4.

38. A game you’re ashamed to admit that you like? The Sims 4

39. A sequel that you would die for them to make? Dragon's Dogma 2 WHICH I think is actually in development, so I'd have to say Fallout New Vegas 2. C'mon Bethesda you cowards, hand the keys back over to Obsidian so they can make another good Fallout game!

40. What to you think of virtual reality headsets or motion controls? Two part question, two answers. VR Headset to immerse in world, yes. Motion Controls, no.

41. A genre that you just can’t get into? MOBAs and MMOs. I don't like paying to keep playing.

42. Maybe it wasn’t your first game, but what was the game that started you on your path to nerdiness? Nintendo 64 opened me up to what video games could be as a kid. Sad to say my parents' NES didn't really do that for me. And years later Fallout 3 was a big game changer for me too.

43. Ever play games when you really should have been concentrating on something else? Every day of my LIFE.

44. Arcade machine that has consumed the most of your quarters? None. I'd rather emulate.

45. How are you at Mario Kart? Pretty dang good. 3-STARS MARIO KART WII, BABY!

46. Do you like relaxing games like Animal Crossing or Harvest Moon? Yes, both of those. I preferred when Animal Crossing had more character to it. New Horizons looks so pretty, but feels so bland compared to classic AC.

47. Do you like competitive games? No. Not really. Usually amongst friends or if I can get competitive against AI Bots. I love my machine bot friends cause they don't cry like 10 year olds when they lose.

48. How long does it take your to customize your player character? Too long. I've seriously restarted games because I wasn't happy with my character's appearance.

49. In games where you can pick your class, do you always tend to go for the same type of character? Yes, I am always the magic man, my brother is always brute warrior, and my friend is the ranger.

50. If you were a game designer, what masterpiece would you create? I don't really know. Honestly, I'd rather mod already good games to make them better than create something completely new.

51. Have you ever played a game for so long that you forgot to eat or sleep? No, that'd be ridiculous. But I've had a friend fall asleep playing games at my house 3 different times and currently dozes off during our Minecraft sessions. So, maybe that's not a completely ridiculous thing after all.

52. A game that you begged your parents for as a kid? Kirby 64 apparently. My brother tells me we had to count out pennies to buy it. I must've been too young with no recollection, but I believe it.

53. What’s your opinion on DLC these days? It's good if its not in the game's files from the beginning and is actually developed AFTER launch... and pre-order bonuses should be standard DLC a month or two later. Some games have content lost to time because of that pre-order bullsh*t.

54. Do you give in to Steam sales? Of course. If you want a game and its on sale then why not? I typically wait just for Steam sales to get games.

55. Did you ever make someone you hated in the Sims and did mean stuff to them? No? I typically make people and characters I like in Sims. I've made villains like Dio, but he's an anime villain and I don't really HATE him despite the horrible things he's done.

56. Did you ever play Roller Coaster Tycoon and kill off your guests? No. Never played that game.

57. Did you ever play a game to 100% or get all of the achievements? I try to for all the games I really like.

58. If you can only play 3 games for the rest of your life, which ones do you pick? The Sims 4, Skyrim, & Fallout: New Vegas. Mods make them live forever. Left 4 Dead and Monster Hunter are good choices too.

59. Do you play any cell phone games? Those aren't games.

60. Do you know the Konami Code? No? But I'll take a guess. Is it make an IP and forget it exists?

61. Do you trade in your games or keep them forever? Keep forever... even the bad ones.

62. Ever buy a console specifically to play one game? PS4 Pro for Monster Hunter World. It was basically for early access since the PC version was being developed and releasing after PS4, but I don't like waiting.

63. Ever go to a gaming convention or tournament? Sort of. Been to anime cons and walked into the gaming tournament rooms only to walk out less than 10 minutes later.

64. Ever make a TV or monitor purchase based on what would be best for gaming? No, but I'm going to be doing that soon, hopefully.

65. Ever have a Game Genie, Game Shark or Action Replay? Did it ever mess up your game’s save file? GameShark for N64, PS2, Gameboy, and Action Replay for Gamecube, DS, 3DS. And no not really, I would cheat responsibly... but there was this one time at school my friend and I borrowed another friend's Gameboy game, loaded it up with my Gameshark, tried playing, it crashed, loaded it back up, save file corrupted... we just stared at each other jaws dropped, "Here's your game back, dude. Make sure you don't play it til you get back home!"

66. Did you ever have have an old Nokia with Snake on it? No, but I remember seeing them on billboards in the game DRIV3R on PS2.

67. Do you have a happy gaming-related childhood memory you want to share? Every game I play is filled with happy memories (mostly.)

68. Ever save up a ton of tickets in an arcade to get something cool? These tiger plushes. My brother got white and I got orange. They were the coolest. Got a butt load of tickets from some jackpot spinning light game thing as I was good at the timing with repeated jackpot hits.

69. In your opinion, best game ever made? I've played quite a few masterpiece games, but to pick one, I'd say Fallout: New Vegas

70. Very first game you ever beat? Super Mario 64. I was a mere child on a Sunday morning and ate celebratory pancakes made by my Dad.

Wow, that was long... I get the feeling this was supposed to be a "send me ask with numbers" thing, but answering all at once is more fun.

Hellsing Liveblog Ch. 45-50

This is the “Soldier of Fortune” arc.  I thought there was a song by this title and there is!    Give it a listen.

This opens with a flashback to Pip Bernadotte’s childhood, where he finds out his whole family is a bunch of mercenaries.    His grandfather confirms it, and I should point out that Grandpa Bernadotte is the most mercenary-looking dude I’ve ever seen.   He’s wearing a friggin’ beret while he tells Pip about how his dad died in some war to raise money while Ma Bernadotte was pregnant with Pip.   Was Pip’s mother a merc too? 

I guess my point is that this whole scene feels really stupid to me.   Kid Pip grew up among mercenaries, but he’s literally the last person in town to find out about it.  How do the kids at school know?   Are the Bernadottes that well-known?   I always assumed mercenaries tried to keep a low profile.   Then again, they are entrepreneurs, so maybe the kids in school found ads about the Bernadottes in the phone book.  

Even so, was Pip’s family trying to keep this a secret from him?  Because Grandpa sure wasn’t.   Not with that beret he’s got on.   It’s like he’s been waiting Pip’s whole life to tell him, so why didn’t he mention it before?  You’d think he’d want to raise the boy to follow in his footsteps, the same as Pip’s dad.  Did Pip’s mom not want him to grow up to be a mercenary?  It just seems like she should have known that wouldn’t work out.  

Anyway, Grandpa Bernadotte waxes philosophical about killing people for money, which doesn’t seem like much of a justification.   Pip was very upset about the whole thing, and I don’t think Grandpa said anything to make him less upset, and then we flash forward to the present day, where Pip’s a mercenary.

I mean, what was the point of that flashback?  Pip was horrified to find out his family kills for profit, and then at some point he got over it and joined the family business.   Why didn’t the flashback show us that moment instead?  It seems more relevant.  

At any rate, I feel like the flashback is overlooking the true point of Pip’s character arc.  He starts out a soldier of fortune like his father and grandfather, but by joining up with Hellsing he’s now fighting for a much nobler cause, ridding the world of unspeakably evil monsters.  He still seems to look at it like just another job, but it’s still important.  His defense of the Hellsing mansion is a lot more heroic because he’s fighting against daunting odds with very little hope of surviving to see another sunrise, let alone his next paycheck.  

Back to the main story, when Millennium’s forces invaded London, they sent a company to the Hellsing HQ on the outskirts of the city.   Zorin Blitz was tasked with leading this group, but she was ordered to hold off on attacking until the Major gave the word.   The Major then fired rockets at the mansion, only for Seras Victoria to shoot the rockets down... and Zorin’s zeppelin.   Now, Zorin is trying to lead a ground attack on the mansion, except Pip has turned the entire yard into a minefield.   

Seras disapproves, but Pip doesn’t care.   In this sort of conflict, he and his men, the Wild Geese, are at a complete disadvantage.   Vampires, even the weaker, artificial vampires of Millennium, are faster, stronger, and harder to kill.  He hints at some sort of vampiric ability to read an opponent’s movements, too, which might have something to do with that whole “third eye” trick Seras and Alucard use.   Against all of that, landmines are a sensible precaution, since they’re powerful enough to kill a vampire in one shot and don’t rely on a human operator with killing intent. Seras can gripe, but if Hellsing had used mines back in volume 2, the Valentine Brothers never would have made it inside.  Pip clearly read up on that debacle, since it must have taken weeks for his men to bury all these mines.

The landmines do kill a lot of Zorin’s troops, and the Wild Geese lay down heavy fire from the mansion to keep up the pressure, but Zorin won’t give up so easily.   She uses he powers to create some sort of zany illusion, where everyone sees a giant Zorin Blitz attacking the mansion.

So what the hell is Zorin Blitz, exactly?   I thought she was a vampire, but reading this manga has revealed that Rip Van WInkle is a werewolf, which led me to suspect Zorin is a werewolf too.   But the manga is silent on Zorin being one or the other.  I check the Hellsing Wiki, but it contends that both women are vampires, and the term “Werewolf” just refers to the group of officers in Millennium.   This group includes literal werewolves like the Captain and Schrodinger, but not Blitz and Rip.   

Maybe it doesn’t matter that much, but I find it a little silly to call all four of those characters “Werewolves” and then only two of them are really werewolves.   Clearly, all four of them are a cut above the Major’s other troops, and none of them show any interest in drinking blood, or any other vampire-exclusive traits.   On the other hand, this whole battle takes place under a full moon, and none of them seem to be affected by it.    Unless the Major chose this particular night to launch his offensive because he wanted them all to be at full power.   Maybe Zorin couldn’t do this illusion thing otherwise.

Anyway, the Wild Geese see this giant woman slashing at them with a scythe, and they all panic.   Seras sees it too, but she somehow intuits that it can’t be real.   Then she sees Alucard, who reminds her of her third eye.   I’m not sure if this is a flashback or Alucard is using telepathy to coach her from the deck of the H.M.S. Eagle.  

Either way, Seras uses her third eye and not only sees through the illusion but lines up a shot on the illusion-caster.  But it only grazes Zorin.   It disrupts the illusion, but it doesn’t end the threat.

And even though the illusion is shattered, it still distracted the Wild Geese long enough for Millennium troops to enter the mansion.   Seras manages to shoot them down, but there’s more where that came from.

Because the Nazi bastards figured out a way past the mines.   They just threw a bunch of knives on the ground and played hopscotch to get across.   I guess this means they can only get in one at a time, but it’s still bad news for the good guys.

So Pip adjusts his tactics accordingly.  He and his men will regroup and hold up in a defensible location, while Seras roams the building to take the fight to the enemy.   I guess the idea is to divide Millennium’s focus.   They can attack the Geese or watch out for Seras, but not both.   For some reason, Seras calls Pip “sir”, like he’s in charge, and maybe that is appropriate in this situation, but I thought Seras was in charge of their training.  

Then one of the Geese pats her on the butt and Pip steals a kiss.   I’m not sure what the hell this is about.   I guess they were trying to lighten the mood before they go to face certain death, but if my life depended on some vampire girl killing all the bad guys before they can rip me to shreds, I probably wouldn’t sexually harass her, or do anything else to tick her off.   But that’s just me.

Pip seems resigned about their chances.  He’s confident in Seras’ ability, but there’s only one of her and like... 30?  Let’s say 30, thirty Nazi Vampires heading their way.  If even one of them gets past Seras, the Geese will all die horribly.   But they took this job and the risks that come with it, and besides, there’s nowhere for them to run anyway.    He seems to accept the situation with a mercenary sense of honor.   Like, a mercenary should expect to die in some unwinnable battle, and they shouldn’t complain about it, since it’s the nature of the business. 

Anyway, it doesn’t go well.   The nature of the comic doesn’t really make it clear how the Wild Geese are operating, but I get the impression that they’re doing sort of a fighting withdrawal concentrating their forces as they give ground.    But they suffer a lot of casualties in the process.

This leads to the Geese holing up in the big conference room where Integra met with the Royal Order of Protestant Knights before the Valentine Bros. attack.   One guy panics and wants to bug out, but Pip reminds him of what I said a minute ago.   They’ve got nowhere else to go, and they all got into this for the action, so they should stick to their principles, even in the face of death.

There’s this one guy from “B-block”, who I guess was covering a certain hallway, but B-Block got cut off before they could join the others in the Round Table room.    Zorin Blitz decides to have some fun with him, so she uses her weird powers to make him see himself back home, with his dead daughter.  

This seems especially cruel, because it’s not like Zorin needed this diversion to kill one dude.   She’s just really sadistic.

Meanwhile, some other Millennium guys are eating the Wild Geese they already killed, and one of them shows off his ability to tell blood types just by taste.   It’s this really sick moment, but at the same time it humanizes the characters, which is a weird thing to say when discussing Nazi vampires, but you know what I mean.

Then Seras blows the dude’s head off, which is extremely satisfying.

So Seras is holding up her end, and growing more resolute with each kill.   She’s really improved a lot since the last time she was in action.    Yeah, these Millennium vampires probably aren’t that much tougher than the vampires she killed back in the summer, but there are a lot more of them, and they’re trained soldiers on top of that, and she doesn’t have Alucard backing her up like she did before.

By now, all that’s left of the Wild Geese are in this barricaded room, and they’ve run low on silver bullets, which means even the few shots that don’t miss will have almost no effect.   Pip is determined to hold out, confident that Seras will save them, but...

She runs out of bullets before she runs out of enemies to kill.   When she arrives to save the day, she’s still has to go through Zorin Blitz.

But Zorin doesn’t see this as a problem, and she uses her freaky mind powers on Seras, forcing her to relive memories of her days at the orphanage.    Yeah, Seras was an orphan, remember?   Alucard asked Walter about her parents a while back, and Walter said they were both dead.  How did they die?

Well, Zorin Blitz is about to find out...

Somewhere Else Sterek, 1.5K, Teen For the prompt: Neighbors AU Also on AO3

“It isn’t real.”

Derek blinks, startled, and looks up from where he had definitely not been staring at Stiles’ long fingers wrapped around the neck of a beer bottle. “What isn’t?”

Stiles leans in closer, eyes darting around like he’s afraid someone might be listening in, as he stage whispers. He is definitely at least buzzed right now. “Me and Scott. Our whole relationship. We faked it.”

That is... a lot to try to unpack all at once.

Derek’s known Scott and Stiles for a few months now, ever since they moved into the apartment building his mother owns. Derek lives one floor above them and acts as general manager and handyman for the place. Other than himself, all the other tenants are either couples or families, one of his mother’s stipulations for renters.

For these last several months Derek has believed Scott and Stiles to be one of the most loving and solid couples he’s ever met.

Now here he is, standing over a barbecue at the neighborhood block party, being told by a somewhat tipsy Stiles that the relationship is a lie.

“I’m sorry, what?” he asks, and then hisses as he smells one of the burgers he’s been flipping start to burn. He takes it off the grill and puts it onto a plate with the others.

Stiles takes a swig of his beer and then leans in a little closer. “We both really needed to find a new apartment, and this one was perfect. Great location, and way cheaper than anything else we could find, so...” He shrugs. And then his eyes go comically wide. “Oh god, please don’t tell your mom.”

“I...” Derek has no idea what to say. Stiles and Scott are just friends? Stiles... doesn’t have a serious, live-in boyfriend?

“Okay but seriously, we’re cool, right?” Stiles looks a little panicked now and suddenly a lot more sobered up. “I only told you because you and I are, like, bros now, or whatever. Or, well, you let me chill on your couch and eat all your stock-piled girl scout cookies. And you don’t complain anymore when I call you over just to change the batteries on the smoke detector.”

Derek can’t help himself from responding to that ongoing argument. “If you would just go buy a freaking stepstool--”

“That I would use once every freaking blue moon, when you’re just a floor away? I’m on a budget, Hale.”

Derek swallows. “Right. Which is why you apparently lied to get this apartment.”

Stiles bites his bottom lip and looks down, idly toying with the peeling edges of the label on his beer. “I mean, we really are basically married.”

He’s not wrong, as far as Derek’s been able to tell. Stiles and Scott are attached at the hip, and they move around each other like they’re psychically linked.

Derek turns his full attention back to the barbecue, scowling at a hot dog that’s a little too done. “Ask him out, then. I’m sure he’ll say yes.”

In his periphery he sees Stiles rear back, startled. “Uh. Come again?”

Derek flips a veggie burger and nods a distracted greeting at the couple from the second floor who both salute him in tandem with the hands holding their hard ice teas.

“I won’t rat you out to my mother, I’m not that much of a dick. But you guys are good together, and you obviously wish there was more there. Just ask him out. I can tell you right now he won’t say no.”

Stiles starts choking so hard, Derek makes to leave the grill and do the Heimlich.

But Stiles shakes his head and holds up a hand to stop him. “Sorry. Sorry, I just. Scott has a girlfriend? Who he is super in love with. And the idea of me ever being into the guy who is basically my brother is upsetting on so many levels, dude.”

“Then why are you telling me any of this?” Derek shakes his head, brow furrowed in confusion. “If you aren’t lamenting a lack of romance with the guy you’re pretending to be romantically involved with, then why...”

Stiles grabs the back of his neck, ducking his head, and a blush blooms across the pale skin of cheeks. “No real reason. Sorry. Probably best to forget I ever--”

“Stiles,” Derek interrupts. He sets down his spatula, takes Stiles’ beer from him to set aside as well, and steps forward.

He really doesn’t want to get his hopes up. There’s been too much heartbreak in his life that the idea of putting himself out there for more is terrifying.

But he’s been more than a little in love with Stiles since the guy first knocked on his door to borrow milk, and then unceremoniously set up shop in Derek’s living room to eat cereal and heavily critique every title in Derek’s Netflix queue. If there’s even a chance that Derek has a shot here, now that he knows Stiles doesn’t have a boyfriend...

“If you’re not actually with Scott, and you don’t want to be with him, is there maybe someone else that you do?”

Stiles looks up and meets Derek’s eyes, biting his lip. “Maybe,” he hedges.

“And is that someone possibly the same person whose freezer full of Thin Mints is now completely bare?”

“Hey, if you weren’t willing to share your stash, you never should’ve let me into your kitchen in the first place.”

“I seem to recall you hijacking my fridge all on your own despite me repeatedly telling you to get the hell out of my apartment.”

“Token protests.” Stiles waves a hand dismissively, a smirk forming on his face. “We both know you love me.”

Derek smiles, small but genuine. “I suppose we do.”

There is a moment where the rest of the world fades away as they just stare dopily at each other. Derek doesn’t care how much of an idiot he probably looks, only that Stiles has got his hand on Derek’s forearm now, and then they’re both leaning in, and then...

“Wait!” And then Stiles shoves Derek hard enough that he stumbles back a step, nearly right into the grill.

Which is starting to smoke a bit, so Derek immediately reins in the frown on his face to something more like a scowl and focuses his energy on checking the meat instead of feeling heartbroken.

“No, don’t-- I mean, I want to,” Stiles stumbles over his words in his urgency to get them out. “I really want to, I swear, but--” Derek looks back at him in time to see him gesture at all their neighbors around them. “I also really don’t want to get kicked out of my apartment, ya know?”

Right. Derek’s mom is pretty strict about the qualifications for tenants.

But she also has a soft spot for her only son, so.

“You said Scott has a girlfriend?” Derek asks, while taking off the apron he’s been wearing and waving it at Dave from down to block who’s been looking to step in all afternoon.

“Um. Yes?” Stiles replies, clearly confused.

“And they’re serious?”

“As a heart attack.”

Derek nods. “Good. So you’re both in long-term, committed relationships. I think I can sell that to my mom as being within her restrictions.”

“Wait, but I’m not--” It takes Stiles a second to get it, even as Derek’s taking Stiles’ hand in his and leading him towards their apartment building. “Oh,” he says, blinking, and tripping over his own feet. “Oh.”

Derek looks back at Stiles with a smirk and feigns a nonchalant shrug. “Worst case scenario, you can just move in with me and then she won’t have a leg to stand on.”

A burst of bright, delighted laughter erupts from out of Stiles. “Okay, big guy, but we might want to put off conversations about moving in together until after, like, the third or fourth date.”

“You practically live on my couch anyway.”

“I could practically live somewhere else in your apartment.” Stiles wags his eyebrows ridiculously. Derek is so completely gone on this moron.

Which is good, because Derek has a feeling that no matter how this all goes down, he has a very length lecture from his mother to look forward to. But as Stiles kisses him at the door to his apartment, before Derek’s even managed to get his keys out, he couldn’t care less.

Stiles does, in fact, practically live “somewhere else” in Derek’s apartment for a very long time after that.

Conner going on about a book he likes and Kyle looking at him like he’s the actual world is a big vibe I see them having, also Conn seeing Kyle loose it explaining the significance of an art piece in a gallery and just Conn’s face says “this is one of my favorite people.”

ROY BEING THE SUPPORTIVE BRO IS ALL I WANT. Wally being the supportive but more snarky friend is also something that is so precious to me and in character. Okay off topic but my favorite dc couple moment is when linda and Wally are out to lunch and they judge other couples together like how dare dc rob us of obviously made for each other soulmates. If Jai and Iris II Dont inherit their parents snark dc doesn’t have a braincell between them.

Conn incredibly romantizing their dates because that is legit how he remembers them can be so personal to me. Also imaging northern Cali boy Kyle trying to skate is funny, however I can see him rollerblading well.

YES! Their road trip, ugh, sleeping under the stars with a boy youve known for less than a week, thinking to yourself how handsome he is and you, a disaster bi, trying to sus out if he’s gay but really your just happy to have a friend as well. Them stargazing together out in the middle of nowhere probabky becomes a tradition for them. Tbh gazing out at the stars in the desert/beach probably has a lot of sentimental value to Kyle, cause like let’s be honest it was where we first saw him but where he saw the event that would lead the ring to him in the first place even if he didn’t know that yet. Tbh, I do think one of their first deep kisses was under the stars like this one, it seems like a romantic place to have a first kiss tbh.

They literally look at each other like they hung the moon and the stars. And knowing Kyle maybe he has lol. But they just they love each other so very much. 

Roy is so supportive of his bro I just DC are monsters for taking it away. I am sorry to break it to you but DC stomped out all their brain cells like jumping on grapes to make wine in the 80s when they killed Barry Allen. Quickly followed by Marvel Comics in the 90s who contributed their brain cells to the mix with the clone saga. (i kid I kid I love spider-mans brothers/clones like my own children)

Kyle can rollerblade very well I’m sure of it. He went to art school in LA and then like quit or something to be a free lance artist. that boy could afford nothing but roller skates. (Alex had the jeep lol) 

it does and yes going out into the desert to stargaze is everything to me. Okay and Conn figures out it’s something Kyle and Alex used to do and he doesn’t wanna like take over that thing. But Kyle just says it reminds him of her and he hopes that doesn’t bother Conn. And like it doesn’t if there is one thing consistent for everyone of Kyle’s SOs and everyone really is that they all know how much he loved Alex and they all respect the hell out of her. So yeah Kyle is happy to do the things he loves doing with whoever he loves you know. 

It is very romantic. They’re very romantic. I love them because they were just like you know most of these friendships are fight the bad guys chill in the down times. These two were like let’s chill oh and also I guess we should probably kick the shit out of these asshole cops or whatever. I love them 

It’s Not You Pt.7

They sat in silence for a bit, finishing their food. 

Scared that if he’d look up he’d find Cas staring back at him with those big blue eyes, Dean kept his head down, pretending to look at the remaining pie on his plate. Only, once they were done, he didn’t have any more excuses not to look at Cas. So, steeling himself, Dean raised his head and immediately found Cas’s eyes, that glanced away the moment they met. Clearing his throat, Dean decided that the only way out of this steaming pile of shit was through.

“So. Cas.” The freshman’s head swiveled towards Dean, who desperately tried not to lose his nerve. “Sam tells me that you bring an extra sock everywhere you go, just in case you lose one from another pair.” 

Cas blushed furiously (awwww) and started fiddling with the edges of his sleeve. There was a word, a name maybe, stitched into the underside of his sleeve, but Dean couldn’t make out what it said. He focused instead on Cas’s face. “My mom makes me bring an extra because she knows that whenever I go somewhere, I always lose one sock.”

Dean’s eyebrows shot up. “Always?” A nod from Cas.

“Always always? As in, not once in your entire life have you gone on a trip somewhere and not lost a sock?” 

Another nod. “Well then the Sock God up in Sock Heaven must really hate you, Cas.” 

Dean loved the way the name rolled off his tongue. What he loved even more, though, was the small smile and laugh that Cas let out. Just for him. Now feeling incredibly pleased with himself, Dean bravely asked another question.

“And is it true that you have a vinyl record signed by the one and only Bruno Mars?” At this, Cas got this adorable proud look on this face and he nodded. 

“I went to one of his concerts for my sixteenth birthday and my mom got us backstage passes. That’s where I got him to sign it.” He then added quietly, “I’ve kinda been obsessed with him since I was little.”

“Did you bring it with you?”

Looking a little surprised, Cas nodded. Taking a deep breath and shyly looking down, he asked, “Do you want to see?”

Grinning from ear to ear, Dean said, “I’d like that.”

***

Back in the dorm room, which looked like it came straight from a magazine because it was so clean, Cas walked over to his bed and the record hanging above his pillow. Taking it off of the wall like it was the Mona Lisa, he gingerly cradled it in his arms and walked over to Dean. 

“Be careful.” He whispered as he offered it into Dean’s outstretched hands. Nodding, Dean held the vinyl record with the scribbled ‘Bruno Mars’ in the center. It was heavier than he expected. Heavier and a lot more rough. Examining it for a few seconds, he then silently handed it back to Cas, who looked thoroughly relieved that it was finally back in his care. Even then, the cute look of worry never truly left the freshman’s face until he record was safely hanging back on the wall. Oh but how adorable he looked when he was worried. His forehead scrunched up, and his nose twitched, and he shifted from foot to foot, and Dean decided that he should probably stop mooning over Cas and say something.

“I know how to play some of his songs on the guitar.” Cas obviously wasn’t expecting Dean to start talking, and he jumped a little at the sound of his voice. Dean fought back a smile and continued. “I’ve been playing the guitar for a while now, since Sammy was little.” He sat down on Sam’s bed, wincing a bit at how far down he sank into the mattress.

“Did he ever tell you that the only way he would be able to fall asleep when he was a kid was if I sang to him?” 

Cas shook his head with a small smile and in turn sat down across from Dean on his own mattress.

“Well, it’s true. And one day there was this guitar up for grabs outside this house that was for sale, and I decided ‘What the hell, I sing to him anyway. Might as well learn to play the guitar while I’m at it’, and snatched that wooden piece of junk from the driveway.” Smiling at the memory, Dean shrugged. “It’s still the same guitar I play now. She’s never let me down.”

He heard Cas stifle a laugh. “She?”

“Yeah. She. If my car is Baby, then my guitar is Baby 2.0.”

The giggle that left Cas’s mouth made the entire room brighter. Dean suddenly made it his life’s mission to make this freshman smile and laugh as much as physically possible. Starting now.

“Hey, did Sammy ever tell you about the time that he got invited to this chick’s middle school Halloween party? And he thought that she was oh so pretty and got so nervous, that when he went to go bob for apples and show her how ‘much of a man he was’, he threw up all over her?”

Cas stared at him for a second before bursting into laughter. Dean couldn’t have been happier. Making a split second decision, he got up and moved across the room to sit down next to Cas on his bed. Cas looked a little shocked at first, but then Dean launched into another story that had Cas almost rolling on the floor with laughter, making Dean the luckiest man alive.

“What about you?”

Cas looked up, still smiling but now a bit confused. “What about me?”

“Has my little brother done anything stupid around you?”

A slow smile spread across Cas’s face and he started telling Dean about the time that the boys had accidentally left their window open and a bird had flown in. Sam had apparently tried to shoo it out, but it had pecked him in the face, causing him to run out and come back a few minutes later with a broom, then proceeding to chase the bird around the dorm room. At one point in the story, Cas had stood up and pointed to a small indent in the wall, explaining how Sam had swung the broom towards the bird but missed, instead hitting the wall. Demonstrating Sam’s furious running back and forth, Cas had Dean almost in tears by the end, and he collapsed onto the rug in the middle of the room and panted, trying to catch his breath. His dark hair was spread around his head like a halo, and Dean had the fleeting thought that Cas looked like an angel. A beautiful, insanely adorable, funny as hell angel.

Dean gasped out through laughs, “What kind of bird was it?”

“A pigeon.” Then Cas’s eyes went comically wide as he lowered his voice to a whisper and brought his face so close to Dean’s that their foreheads almost touched. 

“It pooped on his head.”

Both boys dissolve into another fit of hysterics. Dean was soon joining Cas on the floor, both of them rolling around, cracking up. Dean couldn’t understand it. How happy he was, laughing his heart out with this freshman. God damn it, he was Dean Fucking Winchester. He wore leather jackets and had a cool car and could beat you up if you looked at him the wrong way. Yet here he was, with a boy that made his face light up and his stomach hurt and his heart almost burst out of his chest. Cas had somehow managed to throw everything Dean Winchester stood for out the window, and now he found himself giggling like a five year old at the faces Cas was making. And Dean didn’t want it to end.

Wiping the tears from his eyes, Dean choked out, “Do you have pictures?”

Cas nodded fervently and hauled himself up into a sitting position on the floor, sweater sleeve hiking up on his arm as he reached for his phone that was lying on his desk. 

Dean froze. 

Before he could think about what he was doing, he was tackling Cas and wrapping his arms around the now very very confused looking freshman. The one that was so cute and adorable and whose smile lit up Dean’s entire world. The one whose laugh was like listening to the prettiest music on Earth. The one whose eyes were like staring into the summer sky and whose hair looked like a halo around his head.

The one that had the word Winchester imprinted on his wrist, and whose last name, Novak, was stitched into the underside of his sleeve.

The one that didn’t pull back when Dean pressed their lips together, instead letting out a small sound that made Dean glow from the inside, and returned the kiss. It was perfect. Dean had kissed people before. He had kissed girls, he had kissed boys, but nothing could have prepared him for this kiss. This kiss was an explosion of color. Fireworks, even. 

Dean finally, finally, raised his hand and ran it through Cas’s hair. Hair that felt like silk under his fingers. Dean firmly decided that this had been worth the wait. 

Cas moaned into the kiss, and arched his body up into Dean, who wrapped his arms tighter around the small, cute creature who he could now finally call his. Dean could do this forever, he decided. Cas’s mouth was perfect and sweet and everything Dean could have asked for.

“CAS, I’M NOT YOUR SOULMATE!”

Dean and Cas didn’t even have time to break apart before the door was bursting open and Sam was careening into the room, announcing the phrase loud enough that people five doors down could hear. He was followed by Gabe, who froze alongside Sam at the sight of Cas on the floor, Dean sprawled on top of him. 

“What the shit-” 

“I can explain-”

“The hell are you doing, barging in like that-”

“You’re finally getting laid little bro-”

They all spoke at once, drowning each other out. Sam and Cas were both red in the face, one of them apologizing and the other staring at Dean in disbelief. Gabe, meanwhile, was obviously trying to contain his laughter, and Dean was clearly mad that his brother had interrupted them.

“Can someone please explain what’s going on?” This came from Sam, who looked incredibly confused at the scene in front of him. 

Dean smiled and started rolling up his sleeve. He then unclasped his watch, which he only ever took off at night, so that Sam could never see his soulmate’s name. After realizing as a little kid that he and his brother shared the same imprint on their wrists, he refrained from sharing his soulmate’s name with his brother, afraid of the drama it would cause in the family. Instead, he kept his watch on him at all times of the day, but it finally came off now.

Sam inhaled sharply as he saw the clear, black ‘Novak’ inscripted on his brother’s wrist. Cas gasped, too, and his wide eyes met Dean’s, who didn’t look away this time.

“So what y’all are telling me,” Gabe spoke up now, still trying his best not to laugh. “Is that I’m going to be fucking your brother, and you’re going to be fucking my brother? We’re one big brother fucking family now or what?”

There was a moment of silence. 

“Try selling that shit to Disney.”

And then they were all shrieking with laughter, doubling over and gasping for breath until their sides hurt. Cas and Dean were yet again rolling on the floor, but this time they were grabbing at each other’s hands and shirts instead of keeping to themselves. Gabe had collapsed onto Sam’s bed, giggling into the pillows. Sam was bent over, trying to steady himself by grabbing onto Cas’s chair, which promptly tipped over, sending him tumbling to the ground. That didn’t help matters whatsoever, and it was a solid ten minutes later that they finally got themselves under control and could say anything without the group launching back in a frenzy of chuckles and cackles.

Regaining their breath, Cas and Dean sat up and leaned their backs against Cas’s bed, Cas putting his head on Dean’s shoulder. 

“So how did you figure it out?” Dean asked his brother, who hadn’t bothered getting up from the ground and remained sprawled across the floor. 

Sam blushed and opened his mouth to answer, but Gabe talked over him, winking at his soulmate. “Oh buddy, you don’t want to know.”

Anything that was enough to make Sam blush was a must-know in Dean Winchester’s book.

He leaned forward.

“Tell me everything.”

name  /  alias : leigh  gender  /  pronouns : female + she/her where  ya  from  ? : europe 👀 the  current  time :  18:53 height :  164 cm, i think that’s 5′4 job  or  major :  double major in sociology and media communications, still grinding pet  (  s  ) :  two dogs! one is a 7 year old maltese and the other a 3 year old cane corso favorite  thing  (  s  )  about  yourself :  im a great listener and i give great advice, i’m straighforward which some people don’t like but oh well, i’m pretty adaptable. i got some nice titties any  special  talents  ? :  i can roll my tounge in any direction + crack a lot of knuckles ajkdshaj

why  you  joined  hqclouds :  i’ve been itchng to write more lately, so when love told me about their group i thought i’d give it a shot !!

meaning  behind  url :  strawberry moon was just a recent occurance irl which was really cool + i associate marinette with strawberries for some reason, and i’m a big fan of the lady moon

last  thing  you  googled :  i’m having some issues with my michrophone and zoom so i googled how to fix it, but no dice

birthday  /  zodiac :  leo ! my birthday is august 11th in  your  opinion  ,  does  your  sign  suit  you  ? : yes and no. leo’s are very misunderstood imo, but each sign has the “more popular” or well known traits and then there’s the flipside of the coin—which i think suits me more myers  -  briggs :  ISFP / INFP moral  alignment :  chaotic idiot hogwarts  house : gryffindor

three  fictional  character  (  s  )  you  see  yourself  in  +  why :  i honestly see myself in katara from atla, the whole smothering mothering routine. it’s becoming a regular thing for my friends to say “thanks, mom” or “ok, mom” so i guess i’m the mom friend. also fred weasly... he’s a twin.. i’m a twin... that’s all i need. and lastly, and very leastly, neil josten from all for the game series. most of you probably don’t know it, but he’s a demisexual chaotic idiot who says “i’m fine” way too much for someone who is most definitely not fine.

i  started  roleplaying : probably when i was around 16-17 was my first official roleplay experience. it was on facebook and kind of a nightmare types  of  rps  i  enjoy :  i like college stuff and small town rps, but i also love plot heavy rps that push you into developing your muse. really anything that isn’t too restricting favorite  fcs  to  use :  i don’t have go-to faceclaims. i tend to make a character around a FC and then use them until i lose muse or just feel like they need to rest. switch it up a lot, but some faces that i’ve really enjoyed playing for a longer amount of time are steven kelly, cindy mello and ellen v. lora fandom  (  s  )  you’d  like  to  write  in : i want to write in all of the fandoms i know nothing about and look like a dumbass. also harry potter, the hunger games, avatar the last airbender, gossip girl, etc etc fandom  (  s  )  you  aren’t  in  but  are  curious  about :  marvel somewhat, any video games are very fascinating to me even though i’m not a gamer + know nothing about them, any distopian kind of fandom re: hunger games

share  a  funny  roleplay  horror  story :  recently an admin of a twitter rp tried to use my male muse for their weird ship narrative. they tried to make him look like an asshole (& i do play assholes but this one wasn’t one) + used another male muse to make it seem as if these two boys were fighting over the person’s girl, even though she actually had a ship all lined up. they were also running the gossip twitter, so they made up a bunch of stuff about our muses without our consent and consequently i told them to fuck off, and both of us left the group. then she had no more “groupies” so she cuffed and the group closed two days later. it was petty hilarious.

fondest  roleplay  memory :  once in an OC group, i wasn’t “technically” doing a ship with a friend, even though the characters had feelings for each other. but for some reason the status of their relationship was a hot topic group wide, meaning everybody had their nose in it and wanting to know what’s up, so they publically kept doing things to make people think they’re together while denying it in the same breath. it was really fun to let it play out like that.

favorite  canon  muse  (  s  )  to  play : roy mustang from fullmetal alchemist, katara from atla, and my baby marinette favorite  original  muse  (  s  )  to  play : the last original character i played and fell in love with was named alex. im obsessed with him. still doing 1 x 1 with his girlfriend. they’re having a baby, it’s all very emo and domestic. maybe i make him relapse for funsies. canon  ships  you  can’t  help  but  love :  lupin x tonks from harry potter, korra x asami from legend of korra, danerys x daario naharis from game of thrones, katniss x peeta from the hunger games, etc... trope  (  s  )  you  tend  to  be  guilty  of : i use the rich kid douchebag stereotype a lot. i also make a lot of my characters addicted to something to make them struggle with that.

i  prefer  .  .  . angst  ,  smut  ,  or  fluff :  bro... i am a sucker for ansgt and smut. i do fluff on special ocassions >:) long  or  short  replies :  i prefer when they start out shorter, but medium is my fave pre  plotting  or  chemistry : chemistry all the way. plotting can be really fun but it’s a miss more often than a hit for me. plotting can be good for pre-established relationships but that’s about it sentence  starters  or  headcanon  memes : sentence starters single  muse  or  multimuse  blogs :  i’ve never done a multimuse blog, and i’ve actually been super against them in the past, but i’m starting to change my mind hehe gif  icons  ,  medium  gifs  ,  or  static  icons : static (or none honestly)

grab  the  book  nearest  to  you  and  pull  a  quote  from  it :  ❝ You were children. was there no one to protect you? ❞ — ❝ Was there no one to protect you? ❞

what’s  a  quote  or  song  lyric  that  speaks  to  your  soul  ? :  ❝ I loved her, and sometimes, she loved me too ❞ 

top  current  celebrity  crushes :  zendaya, margot robbie always last  movie  you  watched :  365 days (2020) did  you  like  it  ? :  i hated it, what a waste of a perfectly good 2 hours  favorite  movie  (  s  )    of  all  time : harry potter franchise makes me nostalgic, perks of being a wallflower, my sister’s keeper favorite  tv  show  (  s  )  of  all  time : for some reason i’m obsessed with grey’s anatomy but i hate it favorite  tv  show  that  hasn’t  ended : well fricking grey’s anatomy favorite  series  of  books  /  novels  /  comics : the hunger games, harry potter sports  team  (  s  )  you  rep : my friend is into sports i rep her ksdsdj favorite  video  game  (  s  ) : the sims. i like playing animal crossing vicariously through switch owners favorite  youtube  channels : don’t usually keep up with yt channels but i just binged some stuff from psychology in seattle hobbies :  procrastinating

what  are  the  three  non  essential  things  you’d  bring  to  a  deserted  island  ? : sunglasses, hairtie, hand cream

put  your  music  on  shuffle.  what  six  songs  pop  up  ? : 

say goodbye by skillet, 

off the grid by alina baraz & khalid, 

bury a friend by billie eilish, 

break up with your girlfriend by ariana grande

get back by nine lashes

marry you by bruno mars (man)

personal  aesthetic : growing out my hair only to always wear it in a bun dream  vacation  ? : i just wanna go to the seaside with my friends dream  job  ? :  i literally can’t stand capitalism. wanna move to italy and collect berries and draw titties all day dream  car  ? :  something that drives itself if  i  could  live  anywhere  ,  it’d  be : somewhere in canada near the woods favorite  musical : mama mia? counts favorite  food  (  s  ) :  bananaaaaas, ice cream, cereal. these are all foods ok coffee  order : i don’t drink coffee unwatched  stuff  in  your  netflix  /  hulu  /  etc :  13 reasons why (i’m too bored), the flash, outer banks, elite, the half of it, intersteller, locke & key aaand some stuff that’s not mine but someone else using my account

what’s  a  subject  you  know  too  much  about  +  never  get  tired  of  talking  about  ? : idk anything about anything askldhl

Alright, this is ungodly long, but I just wanted to talk about something regarding Jake. 

A lot of this fandom -- at least, from what I’ve seen -- label Jake as stupid. Some may even say Jake and smart are antonyms. This could not be further from the truth. It almost irritates me how much the fandom places this mischaracterization on him. Also, I get to talk about The Lad™ for about ten pages worth of words on Google docs, which is always very, very fun for me.

Well, first things first, let’s talk about the child genius and multi-billionaire polymath that is Jake English.

Puzzle Modus.

Let’s begin with something small. Jake’s modus is of puzzlekind! This is described as:

It's quite a handy modus, allowing you to captchalogue objects of any size, as long as you can fit them all in a finite space by maneuvering the cards around like a big game of Tetris. You like it because it keeps you sharp for solving any puzzles you might find when you go out raiding hallowed tombs, which is never. (x)

He likes puzzles! This is a huge headcanon I absolutely adore that has a basis in the comic: He’s a puzzles guy! This is just sort of a neat little fact about him that I adore to the moon and back. Just the idea of Jake fiddling about with a Rubik’s Cube is kind of adorable.

This is how he goes about doing everything every day of his life. I think that’s just amazing! And incredibly smart of him, I might add.

Skaianet. 

Jake is shown in the credits to take over Skaianet after the game ended. For those unfamiliar, Skaianet made many things for the game, including but not limited to: the interstellar travel we see, transportalizers, the lab by Rose’s house, all Jake’s fancy-schmancy computers, and Sburb itself. In the beta timeline, Grandpa Harley founded Skaianet. In the alpha timeline, Grandma English did. I know Jake didn’t start it up and trying to pass off his alt-timeline self as him is a bit far-fetched at best, but he had the spoons to take it over. I think that speaks volumes for Jake’s intelligence -- this implies, at the very least, he can understand mathematics and physics at a high level. Remind you of someone we already know?

It is also important to note that Jake does, in fact, build the company back from the ground up, because it went to shit before his grandmother died:

GT: Pretty sure her company made a tidy fortune til it went belly up. At least i still have a few of her knickknacks for keepsakes. (x)

So he built an interstellar company back up -- using what his intelligent grandmother had once used -- to being very useful and practical once again. 

As someone with a degree in mathematics and about to finish a degree in physics, I can say this sort of work would for sure require at the very least a decent understanding of quantum mechanics, statistical mechanics, electrodynamics, calculus (vector and differential forms), ordinary and partial differential equations, and perhaps other things like topology. I don’t know about you -- and I’m probably tooting my own horn a bit by saying this -- but I think that’s pretty nifty, if I do say so myself. 

Actor.

Once again, I’m reaching into the credits to show that Jake has become a movie star after the game ends. Memorizing all those lines, slipping into characters... Being an actor is no easy feat. 

( Side note: This leads into my headcanon that Jake can imitate accents and voices on a whim. No more arguing about whether he has a British, American, or Australian accent -- you’re all right! )

And I would like to add he has two jobs! Skaianet and being a movie star! This guy’s a fucking polymath for Christ’s sake.

Reading People.

Let’s start of simple: Brain Ghost Dirk. I can hear the outcries now of Dirk’s powers being the cause for this. And, yes, I can’t ignore Dirk’s influence in this, but Jake’s hope powers were also needed for the projection to come alive. And the fact he was able to make such a startlingly accurate projecting of Dirk in his own mind is astounding -- even BGD himself thinks so!

TT: You could view me as a projection of the real Dirk within your mind, as expressed through all of your thought patterns about him. TT: So I'm kind of a splinter of his corporeal self who happens to live in your awareness. TT: I'm a startlingly close approximation to the real thing, for all intents and purposes. GT: Just how startlingly close are we talking? TT: I'm not going to give you a bogus percentage like the glasses cause that's not my shtick. TT: But pretty damn close. (x)

A very deep understanding of the other is needed for Jake to do this. That is pretty fucking incredible. He can clearly read people really well -- he had a few times where he was cluing in on Jane and Dirk have feelings for him:

TG: its one of those things jane likes about u so much GT: It is? TG: which TG: errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr im not supposed to talk about 2 u evr so nm GT: Talk about what? TG: nope GT: You mean how um... GT: Well a way in which i suppose... TG: no nope GT: Jane is prone to looking upon me with what i fathom to be more than just friendly affection? (x)

TT: I guess call it an extra birthday present. But instead of a present that's awesome, consider it more like a weird confession that may change the way you feel about me. GT: Whoa uh... GT: Dirk are you... uh... GT: Saying what i think? (x)

He’s not completely clueless on people! In fact, he seems to have a really good understanding of his friends. That’s something a lot of people seem to forget because of the incident that I will be getting to later on.

Fending For Himself.

I’ve already written quite a bit on this, but I’ll sum it up here: Jake is exceptionally good at living in the wild and taking care of himself. Sort of like a wild garden; he doesn’t need to be taken care of. Survival skills, especially around fighting and fending off things, aren’t something everyone has. This, once again, counts in his favour, even if it doesn’t line-up with “book smarts”.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

That’s five things! It’s clear Jake is, in fact, a polymath and incredibly intelligent. So, what’s with the fandom painting him as being dumb? What’s with people actually thinking he’s stupid? I think we can all take several wild guesses as to why that’s the case.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Takes things literally.

This is something that plagues Jake quite a lot. Case in point:

GT: Wow like the epic kevin costner film? TT: Almost exactly. Especially by the same degree of shittiness. GT: Oh man does that mean you have to drink your own pee?????? TT: You get used to the taste. Welcome it, even. TT: That takes about 15 days in a row of hard piss drinking though. GT: Ewwwwwwwwwwww no dude. No ew. :( TT: Relax, I don't drink any goddamn piss, ok? GT: Oh ok. Whew. (x)

But, well, let’s address the elephant in the room. The chat I laughed so hard at when I read it the first time due to pure, unadulterated second-hand embarrassment: Jake asking Jane if she had feelings for him.

Let’s analyze this, shall we? Jake starts off by being vague as all Hell, and I’ll spare those details, until finally...

GT: Just come out and say it. Do you fancy me? GG: No! GT: I see. GT: Very well then. GT: Jeez i mustve really misread that one! I feel like kind of a bone head now. (x / x)

Okay, she says no, and he backs off. That’s fine and dand--

GG: No!!!!!! GG: Oh my God, what am I saying here? GG: Jake, I didn't mean it! I didn't want to make you feel that way! GT: Now jane lets not backpedal here. GT: Youve spoken the truth and i greatly appreciate and respect you for that. GT: But now that i think about it you know what? GG: ... GG: No? :( GT: Please dont take this the wrong way but your answer is actually kind of a relief! (x)

... Oh, right. Yeah. It keeps going. It just keeps--

GT: Actually since youve made your feelings apparent and only see me as a friend that makes it a lot easier! GG: Haha, yes! GG: Friends!!!! GT: Maybe you could help me sort out some stuff that has been weighing on me lately? GG: Well what are friends for Jake!!!!! (x)

Sweet Jesus, Jake.

GG: Me? GG: HOO HOO HOO! GG: I'm just GG: Terrific! GG: I'm feeling so... GG: Friendly!!! GG: I clearly just want to be a good friend and bring all my AMAZING FRIENDLINESS to bear on your problems. GG: Friendlystyle! Ahahahah? GG: Shit I mean GG: Ahahahah! GT: Thats aces. Jane youre a sweetheart. (x)

Alright, alright, enough! You all remember the fucking chat. 

Regardless, it’s very apparent Jake takes things at face value. I also will cite him talking to Jane before her birthday, but not list examples, because what happened above will just happen once again. 

Okay, so he takes things at face value. What’s wrong with that? He trusts people to not lie to his face -- to not sugarcoat things or beat around any bushes. Perhaps I’m projecting a bit, but I do the same damn thing. I think a lot of people do! I don’t think reading things as fact over text is a good measure of someone’s intellect. All it does is show he has issues with communication. Okay, so he struggles with one thing. Sue me.

Doesn’t catch things right away.

Yeah okay I’m just gonna dump a few examples of this.

GT: Haha wow. Must have been a hell of a guy. TT: So... TT: You're not making any connections there? GT: Where? Huh? TT: Famous comedian, about the age of your grandma, inheriting the family name of the Baroness... TT: Not ringing a bell? GT: What are you talking about! Dirk stop speaking in riddles and keep telling the story i am on tenterhooks here! TT: Ok, well it's not like it's that important. Just a super obvious thing that'll probably occur to you later when you're looking in the fridge you don't have, at which point you'll feel like an idiot. GT: Oh my god you can be one opaque motherfucker just clue me in bro! TT: Nah, it'll be funnier this way. GT: STRIIIIIIDEEEERRRRRRRR!!!!! TT: Moving on. (x)

GT: Whats going on? TT: Took you long enough to figure it out. TT: Pages really are a slow burning class. Damn. GT: Figure what out! TT: You're asleep. (x)

This leads into the point above. His mind doesn’t work that way -- but that doesn’t mean he’s not intelligent. He needs everything laid out in front of him so he can make the connections and understand what’s happening, but there’s no real harm in this, and it certainly doesn’t dictate whether the guy is “intelligent” or not.

There are many, many more examples in canon depicting Jake as having difficulties with communication and you all can open most of his pesterlogs and probably find one. I’m not going to list anymore. But, hold your horses, I swear I’m getting to a point!

Difficulty reading.

A lot of the media Jake consumes is picture-based. Movies, comics, even the puzzles are most likely spacial and probably not riddles. It’s not far to imagine Jake might not be a terribly good reader, considering nobody was really around to make him read. Of course, his grandmother was around when he was little, so he can read -- and he can read just fine. But he probably isn’t very good at it simply from lack of practice. He also has terrible grammar, something Jane picks on him for, so it’s entirely possible that’s a contributing factor. He may just have trouble reading and writing.

Speaking from experience, I have dyslexia. As such, reading and writing are incredibly hard for me. I never read the books in my literature classes -- both in English and French -- but I did get the gist of the books (enough to get a decent mark in the class at least) by watching a movie adaptation of the novel. I don’t think it’s that far-off to think Jake may, indeed, do the same thing.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

NOTE: This next part is a bit hard for me to write, because I don’t want to vilify any of you. It might not have clued in on anyone or maybe you just saw Jake as a sort of comic relief and meant no harm by it. And I hope shining a light on this will make you all think twice about the guy. However, I can’t really avoid this next part, and I may get a bit emotional in it. Just a bit of a warning.

All of the above points are just me trying to say Jake probably has undiagnosed learning disabilities and perhaps autism. I don’t think I need to go into detail about how those don’t make someone “stupid”. If you think that’s the case, fuck you. I can’t argue with ableists, much less do I actually want to. 

NOTE: I wrote a thing on his speech impediments. That may be of interest too. I don’t really know, but here it is nonetheless.

My take-away message here is: just because someone struggles with socialization or other things doesn’t mean fucking anything in terms of their intelligence. Jake is very clearly smart and has the ability to read people incredibly well -- to the point of making copies of them! Perhaps it’s just a bit easy to underestimate the guy compared to other characters, though.

There are other things that muddy this up a bit, unfortunately.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Trolling.

Jake is such a fucking troll. Jesus shitting Christ, does he get a kick out of acting stupid just to make the other person look silly. Or perhaps even to make himself laugh in the process. Case in point:

uu: I WILL JUST BE YOUR PATRON DUDE. uu: OR MAYBE. YOUR PATRON MANBRO. GT: Sounds pretty gay. uu: WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? GT: Whats what? uu: GAY. WHAT'S GAY YOU IDIOT FUCK. GT: Oh right. GT: Forgive me i forget you arent familiar with all of my earth lingo. GT: Its like... GT: How do i explain. GT: You know. Its a rather old fashioned term for being jolly and festive together. GT: Like "that rollicking time we had scrumming the other eve sure was gay." uu: I SEE. uu: THEN YES. YOU ARE CORRECT. uu: THIS IS GOING TO BE GAY AS HELL. (x)

Look at his goddamn face during this exchange:

That little bastard knows exactly what he’s doing. 

And these aren’t stand-alone events! Jake is very, very silly and will use the fact others see him as stupid to have a little fun. May as well, right? And, in the process, he makes others look pretty damn stupid. 

But sometimes it’s a bit hard to tell when he’s acting stupid against when he’s genuinely not getting something. I think he even fools himself sometimes! So you have to be a bit careful about fake-outs. I’m sure even the other alphas have trouble deducing when he’s doing this -- which only adds to the myth of him actually being “stupid” when viewed on first-glace.

He probably also does this with crushes, purposefully ignoring the signs because he doesn’t want to deal with it or may not believe anyone could like him that way. After all, if he’s wrong, he may think himself to be conceded and having a big head. So, he ignores the signs, thus convincing himself the feelings aren’t there. Then he gets absolutely fucking bamboozled beyond belief to find out they actually do like him. But that’s just a little side-note.

Thinks he’s stupid.

This one is just a bit... Sad. Very sad. Jake genuinely does think he’s stupid. Quite a lot, really. 

GT: I shoulda asked where he fit into the picture if you were raised alone. I can be dumb as a bag of penny candy sometimes. (x)

Just... Man, he’s been called and treated as stupid so many times, he’s at the point where he believes it. If you asked him, he’d say Dirk is a genius, Roxy is always smart and sassy, and Jane is brilliant. (I don’t have a source for that last one but... Come on. She lectures him about grammar. Don’t fuck with me.) But when it comes to himself? He can’t say the same. Of course he then acts that way. He sees himself as a burly adventurer who is also a gentleman and tries to live up to that. No where along those lines does he think he’s intelligent. And that’s just... a little heartbreaking, really, all things considered.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Can’t believe this blog is just me going, “Wanna see how fast I can talk about Jake?”, and a shit-ton of people all nodding before I talk for six hours straight. Anyway, take-home message is: Jake’s smart. Jake’s very, very smart. He’s also a himbo, but he’s incredibly smart. Just because he has learning disabilities doesn’t mean fuck-all. 

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk. There are drinks and refreshments in the back. Have a safe trip home. Remember to tip your waiters and waitresses. Jesus fuck can I run this gag any harder into the ground? Giving me language was a mistake. No but, really, if you read this whole damn thing, thank you! I hope this was as fun to read as it was to write.

The Umbrella Academy

What a good show!!!!! Let me tell ya, I was sleepin on this show and I have no clue why!?!?! Take a seat, grab a snack, get comfortable cuz I'm about to rant!!!

Ok for starters, as a disclaimer, I knew nothing about the comic books or characters or anything before watching this show. But damn, going into it blind is probably just as much fun as if you were already an established fan.

This show is so so entertaining and well done. It sort of reminds me of Heroes, way back in the day when that show was on (Sylar was my jam gah-damn). I feel like The Umbrella Academy captures that same kind of audience kind of, but it's so independent and unique on it's own that it's definitely separated from Heroes.

This show speaks to me on so many levels. Emotionally stunted family/siblings dealing with the abusive/neglectful childhood they were raised in. Superheroes (also my main jam). Action, love of all kinds, personal development for each character, humor, seriously this show is just so well rounded.

I didn't know what to expect at every turn, I was kept constantly trying to guess what was going to happen next and there were several options to choose from for them to go. Each character brings something different to the table and it's just so fun to see them grow and where they go with the story.

The actors! Good-god-almighty! They did such a great job of picking these people, not to mention the diversity. Yay! I'm so for it, I love it!

Allison is so gorgeous (even tho her hair looking like ramen noodles had me so distracted for most of the season, I got over it...kinda) She is beautiful and her power, "I heard a rumor", like damn dude you could get away with anything with that! No wonder her character chose to be an actress in the show. She is smart and sassy and confident and I'm here for it. I feel bad for her with her backstory with her daughter, but like if I were a mom with her power, I'd probably have done the same thing (cuz ya girl ain't got an ounce of patience for bullshit)

Vanya (super cool name, love it) isn't my favorite character but she is still pretty cool. Its kind of hard for me to look at Ellen Page and not think of Juno. She's never been my favorite actress, but she does a good job with this character, being so closed off and neglected at the beginning and then completely transforming. Homegirl had is super rough as a child, I feel for her, being left out...that shit kills. She is soooo tiny in stature compared to everyone else in the show, it kept throwing me off a bit, but like that's not her fault. If anything it adds to her character. I hate how easy it was for her to be influenced by what others said. (Btw, fuck you Leonard, you're a dick bro, I ain't even gonna give you your own paragraph of opinion, cuz you manipulative fuck, I don't like you!)

Now for the boys!

Good lord they did my boy, Tom Hopper, dirty with the outrageous bodysuit they put on him for Luther! Like he is so naturally built and pretty to look at and they had to go and ruin my visual pleasure of him with that gnarly bodysuit! I spent the better part of like the first 4 or 5 episodes trying to think of how they did this effect before I thought of them making him wear just a big foam prosthetic. (Insert gif of Chris Evans' "I don't wike it" here) Luther as a character I feel needs a bit more development, they don't really define his power super clearly except for his build telling you its strength. They don't showcase it very well and it makes me sad. Also!! Why would you put him on the moon for 4 years! Damn you, Reginald!! Even without the in-depth background development, I love him as a character cuz he definitely tries to be the golden boy, protector, older brother even though they're all the same age. I love him. The dance scene between him and Allison completed me!

Diego is awesome! I love him. I wasn't too sure of him at the start, he looked super suspicious and guilty at the start but I really learned to love him. Not to mention he is hot af, like damn boi! I love how much of a hot-head he is and his power with the knives is dope. His relationship with Klaus is so funny as it develops and I just really enjoy it. He is stubborn as fuck tho! Seeing some of his backstory and how close he is with mom is so sweet, cuz he plays the tough guy when he is such a mama's boy at heart.

Five is such a goober! Putting an old dude in a kid's body, he is so dry and serious and it's just so funny cuz he is the most mature out of all of them! He's such a grump too, but I would be too if I had gone through what he did. His power is super cool and I would love to have it! Imagine all the money you'd save on gas and plane tickets just being able to jump anywhere like that!! GOALS! The fact he can time travel with it is just a bonus! He really is the smartest of the bunch (tho Allison is on his heels, as runner up) I'm my opinion. The fact that he is in love with a mannequin is such a quirky and fun part of the show! It's like they were like, "sure, give the youngest character a love interest, but make sure she isn't real", genius! I don't know what these writers were thinking, but it fucking works.

Klaus is my favorite character of the entire damn show! This boy is so fucking funny, I can't get over it. He has these one-liners or quips throughout the show that just get me. His style and look is so attractive too, especially when he isn't really my usual type, but I was really feeling him. I love that they portray the addiction struggle. I think he, as an actor, really nails that part of the performance and brings a lot of heart to it. He really makes you fall in love with the black sheep of the family, the screw up. I really enjoy his relationship with Ben throughout the show and the fact that it's so secluded to the two of them. I really like that they don't play on his sexuality as what defines him, it's a part of him that is important, but it's not his sole focus and I really appreciate that. I wish they would elaborate more on his relationship with Dave, but maybe that'll be explained more in future seasons? The fact that he communicates with dead people for his power is super cool. The old Russian lady just yapping in the background of that one episode was so funny, but like I can see why he resorts to drugs for relief. Poor baby can't get any peace and quiet, not even in the tub! The scene of him dancing around in his towel is great, it kills me! Klaus really is just my favorite of the whole show, he really steals it for me and I just love him so much!!!

I really want Ben to be expanded as a character. I like the actor they chose for him, I like his sense of humor and the fact that he basically acts as Klaus' conscience. I want more of him, cuz I think he is a cool character and I want more backstory.

Freaking Hazel and Cha-Cha! What a duo!? Mary J. Blige is legendary, so beautiful and suave. Having her paired with a guy like Hazel is just so fun. He is such a sweetheart, falling for the donut lady who is like way older than him!? I would've never called that and it's a bit weird of a relationship, but I respect it! You love who you love! Anyways, Hazel and Cha-Cha are fun to watch and the fact that they struggle so much with trying to kill Five is just hilarious to me.

Altogether the show is just so much fun to watch. The relationship between the characters and the development is choice and I love it. I relate to each character and what they go through in different aspects and it triggers me and my memories, but I don't really mind to be honest, the show is worth it. The main plot of stop the apocalypse is overdone, but if you can look past that (like I do) then the show is so enjoyable. I definitely recommend it to anyone who needs a new binge (seeing as I watched it in an afternoon, don't judge me, I did 5 hours of microeconomics homework before that).

So yeah...that's all I gotta say about that.