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#i know there aren't a lot of options so if you don't like that it must be difficult
humblefryingpan · 3 days
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Sometimes I forget how angry people get about ships that aren't harmful 😅
Tim Drake is canonly bi and he has a boyfriend. People ship him with his ex girlfriend. Both of those ships are completely fine, I think timbern is cute and I don't ship timsteph but I get they were together a while and people like them.
That being said I made a poll to see which Tim ship is most popular (I enjoy seeing what people think yk, it's entertaining) and Steph was one of the options but so was Bernard and someone rebloged it saying if timsteph didn't win it would be misogyny?
Neither of them are winning btw lol, connor is which is its own weirdly controversial thing
The thing is-
Timsteph isn't a bad ship. They were together a while, they were cute. Lots of people grew up with timsteph and like them.
Timbern isn't a bad ship. Just because Tim's dating a guy now doesn't mean he hates Steph or anything, he just moved on (and so did Steph!) and he's bisexual, he isn't just suddenly gay. They're cute too, and it's nice to see representation.
Timkon also isn't a bad ship. They're close friends which is the base to a good relationship, if they got together it'd also be good.
You know what is a bad ship? Tim and Jason. Or Damian, or Dick, or Bruce. And yet I see more people mad about shipping Tim with his boyfriend or his ex girlfriend or his best friend than I see people mad about shipping him with his siblings and his dad.
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astroyongie · 17 hours
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What are you choosing ?
Note: hey everyone! This is  little something that I have constructed in a way for you to see if you really know yourself but also as a way to heal and understand your inner desires and needs. This is a part of what we call shadow working, hopefully it will help. you are free to do this quietly, or if you want to share with me, feel free to do so <3
How it works?: please choose one option between the two and try to argument within yourself why you chose that 
This or that ?
Question 1
an apology from your father 
a hug from your mother
Question 2
being loved
being able to love
Question 3
your father choosing family over work
holding your childhood pet one last time 
Question 4
a good night kiss
your hair getting brushed and braided
Question 5
the ability to forgive yourself 
finally being heard and understood in your family 
Question 6
“i am proud of you” from your mother
“i love you” from your father
Question 7
reading you favorite childhood book for the first time
a letter from that one friend you one day never heard from again
Question 8
crying in your mother’s arms 
yelling at her all the things you were too afraid to speak out loud
Question 9
not feeling constantly lonely
 not feeling constantly misunderstood
now please choose one number between 1-6. pick the one that you are currently feeling most attracted to. and read your message: 
1- Yeshe Tsogyal: you will be able to overcome all of the obstacles you are currently facing. allow your spiritual guides to guide you through this and trust the process, the path that you are in. surround yourself with the people you know bring you only light into your life, allow yourself to trust them more and to trust yourself as well. by working on your spiritual side you will be able to overcome your shadow self.
2- Yogoni: Of course there’s a lot of changes happening in your life at the moment, but keep in mind that sometimes a door will close in order for another to be opened. trust your path and tell yourself if thighs aren't meant to be because life is trying to limit the pains in your life. stay faithful to yourself and your healing oath, as long as you stay authentic to yourself, you will be able to overcome things 
3- Terra Mater: your mental and spiritual path does not unfold like most people, it is taking a different way but you need to trust the process, as your spiritual guides love you unconditionally and they will help you find peace of mind. follow the new ideas and accept the changement that is happening in your life. your manifestation is strong, use it wisely. you know that goal you have? grasp it. Even if people say that it's stupid and impossible for you to have it, don't let it go and fight for your desires.
4- Beatitude: don't be afraid to show the true you. The only way to heal your inner conflicts and the pain is by accepting and loving who you are. even when things seem so hard to reach, keep walking down the rightful path and trust life. all the difficulties are going to bring you to wisdom and the right path.  
5- Biche: You are only a child that has been hurt. I am so sorry that you had to go through this hard thing. but your energy is able to overcome all of this negativity. you don't need to become something that you are not, your spiritual light is already warm and soft. keep yourself true to your inner core and things will become easier 
6- Volva: your spiritual power can heal your dark self way better than what you think. It's time for you to travel through the spiritual world and engage yourself more. don't try to control what is happening and allow it to unfold before you. instead work on something tangible, on something that will help you healing from all the pain you have suffered
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yuurivoice · 2 days
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Not to tell you how to do your job or anything, and I don't think it's the audience's place to give suggestions when this is YOUR profession, it's just a small idea that occured to me.
But maybe in the upcoming Auron audio you could add a little note on the screen saying that new Auron content is coming soon, and then like do the same with future compilation videos, since they tend to do so well!! Like to let people know that if they like the characters, this is not where the story ends at all and they should stick around. I say this mainly cause I remember you once talked about how the major numbers on the Finn compilation didn't translate to a major increase in subscribers. Really hope this didn't come off as rude, I just think maybe if people think the compilations are the ENTIRE story it might not occur to them to subscribe!
It also might yield no results at all, idk. I just remember I didn't subscribe until multipleeee videos had been recommended to me over MONTHS, mainly because I had no idea that there was a story to be followed.
I've written like three different responses to this but as I yap on I get new conclusions and ideas. This is v3 of my answer lmfao.
Preface: People don't pay attention to shit and unless you are clever or use a hammer, they do not care. They want the content. ESPECIALLY if they aren't familiar with you. This makes any deliberate Calls to Action run the risk of annoyance rather than making a meaningful impact on conversions.
Bonus note: If a video is scheduled to premiere, there's nothing I can add to it at this point without doing a whole reupload, giving Thoo a bunch of extra work, and all that shit. So that wasn't ever an option anyway.
My approach in this current iteration of how I do things is that rather than slob on somebody's knob begging for a sub, they're encouraged to either watch more videos or go to the homepage. My working hypothesis is that you're actually MORE likely to get a curious viewer to drop by your homepage before they subscribe, because they want to see what else is available.
The most recent changes I made to the channel homepage should make it abundantly clear that there are multiple stories, characters, and styles of content to jump into. Making sure that the homepage is great has probably made a massive difference in that regard, without impacting the videos themselves.
Playlists are horribly underutilized in this niche in particular, and on lots of YouTube channels really. So I made sure to try and nail that down. Still need to get the channel trailer locked in but tbh I don't know how effective those really are in 2024.
All of that being said, a ~15 second welcome intro at the start that explains what the compilation is and invites viewers to sub/explore the playlists would probably be the easiest way to accomplish that without intruding on the listening/viewing experience in a way that feels desperate or pander-y. That in conjunction with the end screen prompt would probably be the easiest way to do it.
I don't feel like that immediately turns massive hit videos into untapped wells of subscribers that I missed out on, it could help contextualize things a little more and who knows, maybe it WOULD be a big deal. Hard to say!
The context for me not immediately being like OH IT'S A SLAM DUNK HOW DID I NOT THINK OF THIS is because I run a very lucrative business converting viewers to patrons and I have very minimal in-video notes about hearing the spicy bits on Patreon. People often figure things out for themselves if they're motivated enough, and you run the risk of chasing them off if you come across like a desperate ass hoe. lmfao
I appreciate the ask, but also can assure you that I've spent several hours mulling over these very specific issues and I've considered just about every angle. If I had included every little detail and wrinkle of information I was cooking up in the various iterations of this answer it would be a mile long. So trust me. I've thought about it in great detail, have worked with people on it, workshopped things and much more!
Y'all got me yappin' up a storm on here lately. lmfao
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diluc33rpm · 3 months
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the romance/relationship system in bg3 is genuinely some of the worst designed shit i've ever seen in any game with that feature but at least the memes we get out of it are funny. once saw someone comment something along the lines of 'patch note: waving at gale will no longer cause him to buy a house for the two of you to retire in' and i've never recovered since
#i love gale he doesn't deserve (most of) the incel slander#but it's painfully such a good riff because it really really does feel like that#the player choices being a b/w alternation between 'hey there' and 'YOU SHOULD KILL YOURSELF... NOW!' normally is already comical as is#the fact that it carries over into interactions with the party members who you're presumably trying to be close with is... something else#and what makes it worse is it ISN'T jokey hyperbole. anyone remember 'send a mental image of you kissing him or HIS HEAD ON A PIKE.' c'mon#trying to chat and vibe at the refugee camp celebration and the sum of conversation i get is one (1) line asking how they're doing#because going any further than that elicits marking you down for the path of boning take it or leave it#it's genuinely so hard to get to feel like you can deepen a relationship with the characters in ways that aren't trying to pursue them#yes! halsin! i really want to know you better! i just don't want the ass!! why is trying to hit the only option other than up and leaving!!#99% of the time i expect nothing from media creators in terms of writing interactive relationships#larian are beyond parody in that they've somehow managed to do worse than the already suboptimal majority#we're just going to impose the roadblock of do you want to fuck y/n right off the bat. good luck finding a way to talk around that if not#the obscuration surrounding where exactly the checks are really does not help at all either#when the shit's got even the allos complaining about it you know it's BAD#shame because i was excited for character scenes given that's a lot of what's hyped up about the game#but no it's all just the romances. 'what if i'd like to breathe in someone's general direction-' well now have you heard of our romances?#fish fear them party members fear them and tav is going to have to walk alone on this sinful earth#conservative bigoted relative at the family reunion withers era was a fucking time before they tweaked that line speaking of#just so crazy they can get away with this shit#baldur's gate 3#bg3 liveblog
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punkshitposts · 10 months
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something I think is actually hilarious is that if you go left enough you start having more stances in common with (individual) conservatives, and if you go right enough you start agreeing with (individual) leftists. like i have a pretty close friend who's self described as "just far enough right that I hate politicians" , whom I hard disagree with his overarching political stances. but the finer details of it... yeah we agree with each other. gun control/gun rights opinions taxation opinions pro-small government opinions slight separatist opinions anti two party opinions anti-corporation opinion ect ect ect.
we stand on opposite sides of a standard political compass but I genuinely think if I were to count stats, I'd agree with as many of his stances as I would a liberals/democrats stances. my hs gov teacher described the difference in right vs left to us as "everyone's goal here is the betterment of mankind, they just think the best ways to do it are different" and that's literally the best way, to me, to describe what the difference in right vs left is regarding anarchism specifically. we got ESSENTIALLY the same opinion but the ways we think are the best ways to go about enacting said opinion are what makes us different. and something abt that is really painfully funny to me. envisioning a world where an-something is the major world thing, not capitalism.... and there's STILL right vs left... but The Anarchist Versions. christ.
sorry for the book i wrote in the tags. ignore typos I am NOT retyping any of that to fix them xoxo
#this is a controversial post to post here ik. however i think can we all agree that echo chambers and bubbles aren't... good.#and i think something that gets forgotten a lot by leftists is that there ARE anarchists on the right#yes we are EXTREMELY different but its important to like. remember that should The revolution come in our lifetimes their still gonna exist#and political disagreement on an individual scale CAN and SHOULD be civil so long as neither party is coming from a bigoted stance.#as in.. no i dont agree with a good chuck of what his stances but by disagree i just think hes wrong abt economics bros not like. a bigot.#in this same vain i also think (myself included) people shouldn't conflate conservativism with racists and homophobes. t#theres proud gay conservatives and conservatives who are poc... erasing those people means we cannot know of how the other side works.#i genuinely believe that if i were to go read every political theory book on right leaning politics id fine something uniquely republican#/right/whatever that i would agree with and then adapt into my own politics. im sure at least one of the unique-to-the-right stances has#actually standing and isn't a load of shit (again probably something economic rather than social).#and thats not a bad thing and if you think it is a actually don't know how to explain it to you! we MUST critically but civilly interact#with political opinions mirroring our own to 1 understand other people 2 fully understand and develope our own stances and why we have em#i genuinely find political conversations with that friend extremely enlightening even if we both walk away still set in unchanged opinions.#because it means i understand WHY others drift to those options but more importantly why /i/ drifted to my own
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lightningbig · 2 months
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goddd botw makes me a little bit insane. link going through the story and meeting all of these people who use to know him. he doesn't remember. but they talk about him, "you used to train me!" "we were kids together" "I always looked up to you". they have lived a whole life while he's been asleep. he has not changed.
#is it obvious i just got to zoras domain. be honest#SORRY IT JUST REALLY GETS ME!!!#hearing so many people say how they trained with link when they were young and how he taught them and was always a mentor#how much they strove to be like him and now here they are#and it makes me claw at the walls thinking about link who doesn't remember them or any of what happened and who also is now#awake and at the same point he was 100 years ago#while everyone else has grown and aged and improved. maybe even surpassed what he taught them#but they will still view him in their minds eye as the person he was to them as a kid#and he still is!! that same person!!! but they aren't the same as they were#theyve changed while hes been stagnant sleeping unmoving#big 'you died and came back the same but the act of bringing u back has changed me irrevocably' vibes#and also like. i know the point of the game is that link is the hero and he's going to save the day#but god could you imagine waking up with no memory only to be told you died 100 years ago failing to save the world#and now you have to try again. the people who helped you died and arent coming back its just you#and despite how you failed the people of hyrule still revered you and so they are overjoyed to see you again#they are relieved they look at you with hope they talk about your success like its guaranteed like there is no other option#they dont doubt you. they put all their trust in you#but you don't even remember them. youve been asleep for 100 years. you dont even have your sword#sorry for writing a novel in the tags i just have a lot of feelings about this#like the prevalence of cycles & reincarnation in the franchise overall makes me froth at the mouth but the way it shows up in botw!!! MAN!!#loz#botw#k rambles
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seagullcharmer · 2 months
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owwwww
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tj-crochets · 1 year
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Hey y’all! Do you have any recommendations for walkers or rollators that are foldable and can be converted to wheelchairs?  This question brought to you by today’s POTS flareup that has my heartrate jumping to the high 130s every time I stand up but I need to go grocery shopping. I sometimes need to sit down to let my heartrate come back down, but A. it tends to alarm people in the grocery store when I sit on the floor to catch my breath, B. it’s hard to get off the floor on bad blood pressure days, and C. if it converts to a wheelchair, when I hit the “okay no more walking” stage my family can wheel me along with them without having to have the “our faces are uncomfortably close to each other while you push me backwards through a store” experience of a rollator  Heck, maybe one of those like shopping bags on wheels with a fold down seat? Being pulled behind my brother like luggage would be weird but would be a safer way to get me back out to the car than trying to get me both into and out of a shopping cart without falling
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speaking of your coming of age movie that never happens & your narrative non-narratives, shoutout to the arcs that’d be supposedly “worse” lmfao like posts about people-pleasers being like “i’m in my villain era” when it’s just consciously prioritizing themselves at all / noting when boundaries for their own wellbeing are being trampled, and the like. wherein i’m like, well i like talking to people i suppose, i can do the hours of monologue at a wall for one mode, got chatterbox mode, funny guy theatrical mode, etc, but in actuality also, i do not like talking to people lmao. the “yeah, that’s me” movie ending with another voiceover while upbeat music plays & you’re cheerfully walking along in 0.75x speed through some picturesque arena filled with socializing people like =) putting on headphones, turning up the volume, ignoring everyone, dodging people according to the berth one wants to maintain,
#i mean in person i like to be somewhere Parallel to other ppl; but there By Myself technically lol#i also am down for / enjoy spontaneous fleeting interactions w/randos but ofc only the actually good ones; which can sure be rare#and naturally Online interactions have a lot more flexibility than [not having that option] but even then.#like on just one point: being in a ''fandom'' like no thanks at all ever lol even when it comes to relatively niche things#j'etadore quantent being Just Me Posting To Myself. i absolutely do not want to talk to anybody about winston billions.#posts are scrolls i've nailed to a door to be perused if someone wants. take it or leave it; i've given it & left#meanwhile Not In Person chats aren't even enough lol like; need more Delay than a live chat; also too much to say just like irl anyways#gotta be down for short essays at w/e weird pacing & inadvertent caginess abt what ig other ppl would find matter of factly easy to share#i.e. like What Are You Doing? type ye olde facebook status prompt material. well that's a secret / weird / not entertaining enough isn't it#not like i think oh scoff i Should be popular likable & beloved lmfao like no ofc i Know i'm not gonna come off like that. l'autistique.#to be thusly is to be generally considered unlikable / disliked. i probably don't like interacting w/an nt rando too much either.#& w/the power of [adhd] it's like yeah sure i can be the chatty Fun But Annoying person lmfao But. rather than really being begrudgingly#tolerated until ppl are just more used to you / forgive the annoyances it's like no it's just the Annoying part lol beyond that it's like#well you're also somehow still too weird & quiet so worst of both worlds right. And ofc i have Other Traits aren't just for everyone.#some classic easy to embrace shit like bit of a hothead; argumentative; opinionated; stubborn; spontaneous; a hater; cagey....lmao#much of that For Fun but the [autistic Friendly] social cues don't get read that way. plus i Can be unfriendly too ofc lmao. get outta here#like a friend group seems charming & adorably heartwarming in theory until it's like oh god but drawing on all relevant experiences?? No#the third or fourth or nth wheel falling behind on the narrow sidewalk / talked over / finding a chair on the end & ppl dont notice ur here#lowering expectations even for exchanges that Do happen. ppl can enjoy the novelty of a lengthy exchange for like; a day#on the other side of that if what's initiated is like; Brief General messages i'm like oh god lmfao now Eye can't keep up w/this style#beyond that spontaneous shit is like oh god masking. oh god double empathy misinterpretations & being treated horribly b/c of it.#Recognizing & Respecting my actual experiences rather than hypothetical ideals like no i'm Not failing by Not putting myself in more damn#situations lmfao....if i stumble into good ones then great lol. sure have done that & i don't discount the Value therein at all#just sure like [points to the wisdom of e.g. autistic ppl talking abt having to be lonely but at the gain of looking out for / appreciating#themself] like Being ''Unlikable'' or having friends(tm) but not Really / the treatment is shit / you're having to mask a ton anyways...#sure can recall experiences like idk. ppl ''being nice'' & whether on purpose or not it's like actually I'm In Hell I'm In Hell lmfao#and then even if it's not on purpose it's like ah i can't actually talk to them abt it & that's not a great endorsement for the dynamic huh#or just noting like i'm duly accepted to be on the sidelines but what am i doing wrong lmao sweating How To Earn proper Normal participation#lot of anxiety & blaming oneself & it turns out like nah can't excise the Fault of autistic / adhd / cpstdness & you're fine actually#that was ye olde times more so but it's gradual & still fairly recent being like Oh Right. more accurate ideas re: Talking To Ppl At All....
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nexus-nebulae · 1 year
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ok i know that elder scrolls lore is kinda really not great at times but the Redguards (aka The Only People Of Colour) literally being the only human race in the elder scrolls to not share any common ancestors with the other human races (aka, All Of The White People) feels really fucking racist.
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yousaytomato · 2 years
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Y'all learn the word parasocial and then think you're immune to it. You are not. You have no critical thinking skills or self awareness.
#i am not vagueing anyone in particular but this is about ofmd and i am pointedly not putting it on my sideblog#this is about taika lol. like. god.#he makes neat art. he is attractive man. he is smart and funny.#you do not know anything about him. he is not your friend.#he has done many bad things. he will continue to do many bad things and you will be forced to either#publicly cancel him. or. pretend that you dont see his bad actions or that they don't matter#let me tell you now. theres a secret third option where you can just be normal about it from the start#is he a horrible person? probably not#is he perfect? definitely fucking not.#y'all pretend to this but in reality i can tell that you dont#and the backlash is going to be worse than ever whenever it happens because yall wont be normal about him now#I'm making less posts about this than i was at the start of the fandom#because im both jaded to it. and also less invovled in general#and it applies to a lot of people but GOD#at the same time do i think we should be scrutinizing every move of people who have had to fight to get where they are?#especially people who aren't rich white folks born to people within the industry#like obviously not !! and I'm not trying to do that either#it doesn't have to be - microscope on everything they do to try and find the fuck ups#and it ALSO doesnt have to be#microscope on everything they do because they're perfect and everything they say is so good and funny#actually it can be neither of these!!!#im scared of discourse and I'm not in the mood but. man#ajkda i read this back and fully it's incomprehensible....aaaaand post!#to be clear. nothing particularly has happened i mostly just keep seeing that quote again and again#where he says. i hate social media now. all i do is look at fan art!#and in the back of my mind i can't help but be like. look at fan art....and like j*hnny d*pps post...#and again! I'm not angry at anyone having fun with it but damn#but i really only try to follow people with critical thinking skills and i still see stuff close to worship#and I do it too sometimes probably! or atleast engage with it! it's fun to not be thinking about the ways in which people are probably#terrible all the time! like that's not healthy either! idk. i dont have the answers. I'm figuring out how i feel as i type it helps i think
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llycaons · 2 years
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I saw a post about this years ago but the fact that xl treats ruoye, the symbol of his self-harm/deep trauma/the worst period of his life, with such affection and care, is so significant next to the fact that hc treats e'ming (literally a baby, has a piece of hc's actual physical body in it) so cruelly and yells at it and calls it useless trash 😬
#I don't think self-hatred is a good trait for a romance lead honestly#if you aren't going to address it in any way besides 'oh this is so sad and tragic and angsty'#'doesn't it make the romance better bc he's saving him from it?' nah#and I'm too old to pretend that I believe a partner can do that kind of work for someone with this many issues#bc xl being kind to him and making sure he's okay is very sweet but he literally does need therapy#I know I said I wanted to explore other options but hc doesn't care about anyone else does not have peers#or a community besides the city he runs and xl and MAYBE hx#does not have any elders#like. he needs help and xl loving him is not all he needs#compare to mdzs where wwx reached out and became close again with the people he'd lost or the family he'd be torn from#where he's in a community that cares about him#and where he worked out a bunch of his trauma through the course of the story in a way hc just doesn't#maybe I'm mixing my adaptations here. cql wwx definitely worked through a lot...the BM...losing his family....on his travels#that lwj supported him through but his trauma wasn't cured by being in love#she will rly give main characters this complex and deep psychological issues and traumas and allow them#to realistically and organizally work through them#organically*#and then slap a few key phrases and aesthetics on a love interest with three personality traits and call it a day#im so frustrated bc i KNOW she can do more I KNOW she can. please#ma'am...#I may be giving novel wwx too much credit please remember I haven't read the book in like 2 years#tgcf txp
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thatdogmagic · 1 year
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...that your audience won't hate.
This is a method I started using when NFTs were on the rise - thieves would have to put actual work into getting rid of the mark - and one that I am now grateful for with the arrival of AI. Why? Because anyone who tries to train an AI on my work will end up with random, disruptive color blobs.
I can't say for sure it'll stop theft entirely, but it WILL make your images annoying for databases to incorporate, and add an extra layer of inconvenience for thieves. So as far as I'm concerned, that's a win/win.
I'll be showing the steps in CSP, but it should all be pretty easy to replicate in Photoshop.
Now: let's use the above image as our new signature file. I set mine to be 2500 x 1000 pixels when I'm just starting out.
Note that your text should not have a lot of anti-aliasing, so using a paint brush to start isn't going to work well with this method. Just use the standard G-Pen if you're doing this by hand, or, just use the text tool and whichever font you prefer.
Once that's done, take your magic wand tool, and select all the black. Here are the magic wand settings I'm using to make the selections:
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All selected?
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Good.
Now, find a brush with a scattering/tone scraping effect. I use one like this.
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You can theoretically use any colors you want for this next part, but I'd recommend pastels as they tend to blend better.
Either way, let's add some color to the text.
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Once that's finished,
You're going to want to go to Layer Property, and Border Effect
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You'll be given an option of choosing color and thickness. Choose black, and go for at least a 5 in thickness. Adjust per your own preferences.
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Now create a layer beneath your sig layer, and merge the sig down onto the blank layer.
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This effectively 'locks in' the border effect, which is exactly what we want.
Hooray, you've finished your watermark!
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Now let's place that bad boy into your finished piece.
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You'll get the best mileage out of a mark if you can place it over a spot that isn't black of white, since you'll get better blending options that way. My preference is for Overlay.
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From here, I'll adjust the opacity to around 20-25, depending on the image.
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If you don't have a spot to use overlay, however, there's a couple other options. For white, there's Linear Burn, which imho doesn't look as good, but it still works in a pinch.
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And for lots of black, you have Linear Light
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Either way, you're in business!
EDIT since this has escaped my usual circles, and folks aren't as familiar with my personal usage:
An example of one of my own finished pieces, with watermark, so you can see what I mean about 'relatively unobtrusive'-- I try to at least use them as framing devices, or let them work with the image somehow (or, at the very least, not actively against it).
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I know it's a bummer for some people to "ruin" their work with watermarks, which is part of the reason I developed this mark in particular. Its disruption is about as minimal as I can make it while still letting it serve its intended purpose.
There's other methods, too, of course! But this is the one I use, and the one I can speak on. Hope it helps some of you!
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islaytonlost · 1 year
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What Have I Done? LB;MR Fic
First Part, Previous Part, Next Part
Disclamer: I am not an expert in DID. This is not based on that disorder. Please do not use Alfendi to base your opinion of real world people who actually have this disorder
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It’d been a week, every time they tried to sneak in and take something Hilda caught them.  She always found out in some way and came storming to his flat, confiscating anything Fendi had managed to sneak out.
This time it was Florence who caught Fendi. He’d come in long after everyone else was meant to go home but it seemed Florence had decided to stay late. Thinking about it he wasn't sure if he’d ever seen her leave. Of course that could just be because he always stayed late. 
No matter what the reason was she was here now. Timid but curious “Alfendi?” She peers at him round a corner. As if entering the room would be too much.
“Hi” he keeps his voice flat. 
“You’re not -ACHOO- meant to be here,” she rolls into the room. He notes her hand still clinging to her IV. With no Lucy they’d never grown close enough for her to update him on her condition. He could feel Al wondering if she was okay.
He didn’t wonder about that. He just felt the anger flash through him, “is it any of your business?”
“You were shot.” she doesn’t back down but doesn’t move closer either. Staying near the doorway, smart.
“So? Shouldn’t it be my choice?” he snaps, glaring at Florence. She shrinks back against the wall, staring at him warily, “do you think you should have control over my life? Do you think I can’t make good choices?”
“You clearly can’t,” Hilda’s voice echoes through the empty halls.
“Ah-ah-achoo!” 
“Florence, why don’t you go away?” Fendi snaps.
“You can stay, if you want,” Hilda contradicts. Was she just trying to annoy him? If she was it was working.
“I think I’m alright,” she mutters, not moving from next to the doorway.
Hilda turns back to Alfendi, Fendi scowls, “I can look after myself!”
Hilda’s eyes narrow as she strides across the room her finger reaches out and she jabs the bullet wound. The pain is instantaneous shooting through him, making his knees weak, “AH” he huffs, “what’s wrong with you? Why would you do that?”
“To prove that you can't look after yourself, you can’t even stand up straight!” he attempts to then, clutching at his shoulder but the movement sends fresh waves of pain through him.
He takes a shuddering breath, “how dare you! You think I was planning on getting poked in the arm! I was reading! I thought I was safe here!”
“You’re not. Lucy Baker is a killer, she clearly wants to attract our attention. She’s probably watching here.”
Oh, yeah, he’d neglected to tell her about the last time he met Lucy. How she wasn’t really a killer… It’d been so awful last time she’d called them crazy, and rejected Al for not being Fendi. They couldn’t go through that again. 
It didn’t matter, going after criminals was their job and talking to Lucy would be easier if she was behind bars. “I am going to do my job!” he yells. He didn’t want to arrest Lucy but it was in his job description to at least find her. He had to at least find her, ask her why.
“You stubborn mule!” Hilda yells, “can’t you understand? I almost lost you!” was that tears in her eyes? They couldn’t be. Hilda was always so calm, so composed.
Years ago, after he’d been shot she’d said, “I lost you that day” she’d told people she lost her Alfendi. She’d told Lucy. 
Everything seemed to slow, the pounding ache in the back of his head, no, no not right now, not like this, not again, “go away…” he groans, between holding his shoulder and not moving his arm for fear of flaring up more pain he couldn't hold his head like he usually did. 
“What?” 
“No not you it’s just…” he couldn't tell her, she’d never accept it. No one would accept it, no one was on his side, “Just let me do my job,” Al moves closer to having control, “and leave me alone!”
“Get out then!” she yells back.
“I just said not you!”
“Then who!”
His eyes dart around the room, “Florence!”
“What?” both women ask at once just as Al takes over. 
JUST LEAVE, PLEASE. I CAN’T LOSE HER!
“I need to talk to Hilda in private, you’ve heard enough,” Al tries to snap at Florence, it just sounded calm.
“Okay, fine.” Florence wheels herself out, back to forensics. 
“Why do you want to be alone?!”
“Because I don’t want her to hear how much I missed you. Idiot. Not everyone can hear about my softer side. If Lucy is watching here she’s watching you. We need to do this together.”
Hilda frowns at his softer tone but she chose to go with what he's saying instead of the time itself. A tone not fiery enough to be Fendi, “Fine but what about how I feel?”
Act offended, of course I care! I also care about not getting shot.
“I’m just worried about you getting shot!” Al tries to sound offended, “I care about your feelings I’m sure you’ll feel terrible if your shot!” He sounded too reasonable too caring. Of course Fendi cared but it was fiery, passionate. Everything about him was fiery. Hilda knew this fact too well.
“That’s not all, what are you hiding? What were you saying earlier, you were not talking to Florence,” Hilda moves closer, “what happened Alfendi?” she whispers, soft and vulnerable. A closeness that was Fendi’s.
“Don’t,” Al says, to both Feni’s anger and to Hilda’s closeness, “please, I can’t do this.”
We have to do this!
“Hilda, you trust me don’t you?”
“Of course, Alfendi, what's happening?”
“I can’t tell you but I need to do this.”
“Are you in trouble again? I’ve told you you have to do these things with people. You can’t just keep running off aline. It’s how you got shot.”
Al winces at that. If Fendi had never run off alone he’d never be there, if he had never run off alone Diane could well have blown up Lucy’s house (or a hospital, or a school, they still couldn't bring himself to care as much about them though, no matter how selfish). Maybe sometimes it was worth it. 
“So tell me, what’s going on?”
Nothing!
“Nothing”
“Alfendi…”
“Just trust me.”
“I do trust you! I trust you with my like, just not your own! Would you accept that? If I told you to just trust me would you?”
“No.”
“Then tell me!”
I’ll cut your tongue out, I don't know how  but I’ll figure it out don't you dare!
“I can’t,” he begins heading to the door.
“This isn’t you.”
“I know.” he exits the room. 
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vroomvroomwee · 9 months
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Crowley is Lucifer
(Ok I know some of you don't believe this theory but I highly suggest you give this a quick read anyway. I tried to make it short and easy and I'll be going chronologically, from s1 all through s2)
- First, let's get this out of the way, Lucifer and Satan aren't neccesarilly the same person. Even in the show the devil that appeared in s1 has only ever been reffered to as Satan, not even once as Lucifer.
- In the bible Lucifer was the one to tempt Eve with the apple, and who do we know that does that in the show. Crowley is literally THE snake from Eden.
- An obvious one perhaps, but the red hair is also a giveaway
- In the bible Jesus was tempted by the devil for 30 days, in the show Crowley says "I showed him all the kingdoms of the world", so that's another role Lucifer has that Crowley had in the show
- It's well known (even mentioned in the Sandman) that Lucifer was the most beautiful of all angels, and our demon is played by no other than David Tennant
Now on to season 2 because there's a LOT to unpack here
- He litterally started the engine of the universe which was one of Lucifers roles
- He's the first to say "let there be light", which is pretty fucking huge since that is Gods line
- "I worked closely with upstairs on it" even in the first scene they're telling us Crowley is an angel of very very high rank
- He fell for asking questions, which is litterally what Lucifer fell for, for questioning God. This in and of itself should be a pretty big indicator. "I only ever asked questions"
- Shax: "a miracle of enourmous power only the mightiest of archangels can perform"
Crowley: "How do you know I didn't do it"
And Shax just... doesn't counter that. She looks even skeptical, as if it COULD be a possibility, unlike Uriel who says to Aziraphale don't excpect us to believe you did it. Shax litterally doesn't shut the option down which confirms Crowley has the power not only of an archangel but of the mightiest kind
- In the bookshop with Gabriel/Jim he says "I don't remember. It [gravity] seemed like a good idea when we were all talking about it"
- "You're welcome to come in, you might even spot an archangel" don't tell me this was Crowley just egging Shax on and not being sneaky
- The fact that he could sense the demons coming. "Somethings wrong""It's coming in waves", when Aziraphale couldn't. It could be a demon thing but we saw Sandalphon, an archangel of lower rank, in the first season mention "something smells evil" so obviously angels can sense demons too, they just have to be powerful enough. And keep in mind Sandalphon was already in the book shop for quite some time, Crowley sensed them even before they had arrived (he also sensed the hell hound who was some fucking miles away)
- The.fucking.folder. "You have to be a throne or dominion above" and this dude opens these clasified documents like it's nothing. If this isn't an indicator of his high position as an angel I don't know what is.
- He's worked with Saraqael, another very high ranking angel
- "I'm the only first order archangel in the room"... and the camera imediately pans to Crowley, and for anyone who's read the book and watched the show you know that rarely anything is coincidental
- When the Metatron says they can't lose another prince of heaven. This... this fucking line. So it's relatively well known that Gabriel and Lucifer are brothers, and if Gabriel is one of the princes of heaven I wonder who the other one could be. "Two princes of heaven". And the Metatrons words were very careful, he doesn't say lost as in heaven can't find him, he says it in the context that they won't be sending Gabriel to hell since they won't lose another prince to downstairs
- In the bookshop when no one can identify the Metatron he turns to Crowley who imediately recognises him. Now you have this dude, who's literally on top of the angel hierarchy and is responsible for running heaven and the connection to God themself, surrounded by archangels and a principality you spoke to face to face with just a few years ago and... none of them can tell who you are, the only one who does is the literal demon. That tells us that Crowley has not only seen him in this form, but has probably worked with the Metaron himself personally. "Always asking damn fool questions", 10 million angels and he remembers what this one particular angel was like 6000 years ago
- Crowley is also very reluctant to reveal his identity as an angel. Now if he were just an ordinary angel of no real significance he wouldn't have a problem revealing his name, but... if his name was one that's the literal representation of all evil in this world, then it is understandable he keeps it a secret, in fear he might scare Aziraphale away
- And I wanted to leave the best for last. So you remember in the book when Crowley has to sign his name to start Armaggedon, and Hastur tells him "no, your real name" after which he reluctantly writes it. Now in the book we never see him write anything, but in the show we see him write a sygil, something that looks very mich like an L. An L... A FUCKING L. And now I wonder how this theory didn't come up sooner.
(Also he can fucking stop time, like dafuq)
Edit:
- "Oh looky here it's Lucifer and the guys" we all thought he was talking about someone else, he's just refferencing things other angels have said about HIM. FUCK
- I keep seing people saying Crowleys memories were wiped because he couldn't remember Saraqael and Furfur. But I think people forget, demons lie. He's lying to make them think he's not that angel they worked with, that he's not Lucifer. (In season 1 we hear him a few times refferencing his life as an angel, so he does remember most of it)
- Also saying if the Raphael theory were true then as showrunners they would have mentioned him somewhere for those not that familiar with the bible (or don't read much fanfiction). The refferences for Crowleys past are so so vague that it would be too sudden and confusing if he were Raphael. But there is one name that everyone is familiar with, no matter who you are how old you are or where you're from, a name that needs no introduction.
Edit 2:
- Back to him being the most beautiful angel, I don't think it was ever quite explained how every single demon when they're in hell looks... awful, but Crowley doesn't. Beelzebub has the spores all over their face, Hastur the maggots and the sh-, Dagon the scales etc. But Crowley doesn't, not even when he's in hell, he's always just so, well, pretty.
- I saw a few people asking about how Lucifer started the rebellion and Crowley wouldn't do that. I think it's the same Crowley who wouldn't get stuck in traffic after creating the M25, or the same Crowley that wanted to call Aziraphale after bringing down the entire London network, "you told them you invented the spanish inquisition, and started the second world war""so the humans beat me to it that's not my fault", "so all this is your demonic work?""no, the humans thought it up themselves nothing to do with me"
- Also I think Satan's in charge of hell not Crowley the same way the Metatron's in charge of heaven and not Gabriel (and who can very easily demote angels if he so wishes)
Edit 3:
- like some of you pointed out Lucifer is also known/means Light-bringer. And Crowley was the first to say "let there be light."
- The file he opens with Muriel is Gabriels file, a class A archangel, so if he knows the password to that it means that either he's on the same level as Gabriel, or above him.
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melannen · 11 months
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How To Make Your Own Fanfiction Archive, In Just Ten Easy Steps
As the go-to "person who knows about AO3" for quite a few people who read fanfic but aren't really linked-in to wider fandom culture, I've fielded a lot of questions about how to do certain things on AO3 to which my best answer is "you should really start your own archive!" I think, in general, more fans starting their own small archives would be a net good for fandom. AO3 was never meant to be the only archive for all fandom, or even the main archive, and the more spread out and backed up we are the more resilient we are.
But of course I have to be reminded that a lot of fans these days don't really have any idea how little "you should start your own archive!" really involves. (Also, that I should practice what I preach.) So I am now making my own fanfiction archive, and writing up this post as I do it to tell people how to make theirs!
Go to https://neocities.org/ and sign up for an account. It only needs a username (which will also be your website address), password, and email. Pick a username that will be related to your archive's title!
Choose the free account option (if you ever need more than what the free account offers for a text-only archive, you should probably look into graduating from neocities.) This should take you to a menu of "how to make a website" tutorials. You should do them! They're useful skills. But let's get your archive running first.
Hit the big red Edit Site button, or open the menu under your username and select "Edit Site".
Select the "Index.html" file to edit. You're now in an HTML Editor. Congrats, you're a web developer c. 1999!
Find where it has text between the < title> tags. Delete the filler text, and put in the title of your new archive. This text will be what shows on the tab when people go to your archive.
Find where it has text between the < h1 > tags. This will be big header text at the top of your page. Put the title of your archive here again. If you have no experience with HTML, you should read over the other sample text. It covers the basic basics very well! Once you've done that, you can delete everything else between the < /h1> tag and the < /body> tag. Save your index.html file.
Get an HTML file for a fanfic you would like to add to your archive. If it's on AO3, you can use the html download option built into AO3. If you have it as a word processor/google docs file, you should have the option to save as an html file. Save that html file to your computer.
Go back to Edit Site on Neocities and go to "upload". Find the html file you saved and upload it. (You can also drag and drop files to upload.)
The file you uploaded should now be showing with your other neocities files. Right-click on the title and select "copy link".
Go in to edit index.html again. Under where you put your header text, type < br> < a href=" . Then paste in the link you copied. Then type "> Then put in the title of the fic. Then type < /a> . Then save the index page again when you're done. You can do this for every fanfic you have.
Congratulations! You now have your very own personal private fanfiction archive that you are 100% in charge of and make all the rules for. It's at least as good as half the ones I was reading on when I started reading fanfiction and will serve its function well as a way to let people read your fic. You can link to it from anywhere you want! (Including your AO3 profile.)
Blogpost version, with FAQs and discussion
Anyway, here's my beautiful new fanfiction archive made using this tutorial:
Melannen's Fanfiction Archive
(I am honestly way more disproportionately proud of finally making that than I expected to be. It's nice to have your own archive.)
If you make one, share it here ! I want to see!
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