#i didn’t get to finish the maya one </3
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Hot shots | Mary Earps x Russo!reader
Warning vomiting, think that’s it
“Mary, you’re not actually gonna make us do it are you?” You asked your fiancé, Mary, as you sat down on her bed with your sister and Maya.
“Of course I am, babe. It’s good for us.” Mary explained and you shook your head at her.
“I can’t believe this. I hate you. I really do.” You said, lying through your teeth.
How could you ever hate Mary? How could anyone hate Mary?
“That’s a lie!” Mary exclaimed, as she set up her phone.
“I know. I could never hate you.” You told her, resting a hand on her back once she’d sat down next to you.
She threw her arm over your shoulder and pressed a kiss to your lips.
“Stop it.” Alessia complained, pushing you off Mary. “You two can’t go one minute without your lips touching! It’s disgusting.”
“Less, let me kiss my girl.” Mary told her, reconnecting her lips with yours.
“Your girl is also my sister and I don’t like it when you eat her face off. As much as I hate her sometimes, I would still quite like it if she had a face.”
Instead of obeying to Alessia, you and Mary looked at her before reconnecting your lips.
“My god, you two are like teenagers! You can’t go a minutes without your lips on each others.” Alessia exclaimed, diving in the middle of you both to disconnect your lips.
“Fine, fine, let’s just start the video.” You said, much to Mary’s dismay, who wanted another kiss. “You’ve got all night to kiss me.” You whispered in her ear and a smile appeared on her face.
Mary leaned forward to start the video and you nearly fell off the bed, sending Maya into a fit of laughter.
As Mary sat back on the bed, Maya still laughing, she wrapped her arms around all three of you and began talking to her phone.
“Right. Hello, everyone. We’ve got a challenge for me, Maya, Alessia, and my gorgeous fiance, Y/N, today.” Mary began, introducing you all.
“You just had to get that in, didn’t you?” You asked her, rolling your eyes.
“Of course I did, everyone needs to know that you’re mine. Anyway, It’s a weird one today. Hot shots, like the hot shots we are.” Mary continued, and started to open the packaging, handing you each one bottle.
“What’s in them?” Alessia questioned, curiously looking at the bottle.
“Why don’t you do a presentation?” Mary suggested.
“Have you kept them in the fridge?” Alessia asked, laughing as she shook her bottle.
“She has. They’ve been taking up our whole mini fridge.” You said, shaking your head at Mary.
“Orange, lemon, ginger, turmeric, and cayenne.” Alessia called out, naming the ingredients in it.
After a conversation about how to say turmeric, it was time to try them.
“Right, rumour on the street has it, it’s got to be down in one.” Mary told us
“Mary, that’s too big to do it in one. Look, it’s 100mls.” You pointed out the obvious, turning your bottle to show her.
“I can smell that from here.” Maya said, smelling the strong scent from Mary’s bottle.
“You can’t say that because Alessia eats with her nose cause she’s a weirdo. She’s done it since she was little. I mean, who eats with their nose?” You said, purposefully trying to wind your sister up.
“Shut up, Y/N, it’s not my fault.” Alessia whined, nudging her shoulder, roughly, with hers.
“Right girls, to good health. Down the hatch.”
You all clinked bottles with one another before preparing to drink it.
“I’m not doing it all in one.” Alessia stated, you nodding in agreement.
“No, we’ve got to go for it. You both got to do at least half.” Mary compromised and you and Alessia nodded, agreeing to do at least half.
“You just need to keep swallowing.” Maya suggested and you took a deep breath, preparing for the vile taste to take over your mouth.
“3, 2, 1, go.” Mary counted down and one she finished, you all started drinking it.
You took one sip, before sprinting off to the bathroom, spitting it out.
You heard Maya and Alessia laughing as you rinsed your mouth out with water.
Mary quickly followed you, making sure you were okay.
Once you’d washed your mouth, you made your way back out and into the room.
“That was fucking vile.” You exclaimed and sat on the bed. “How did you finish yours? I’d be sick if I had anymore.” You asked Maya and your fiance as you noticed their empty bottles.
Alessia on the other hand, had a half full bottle in her hand, clearly only having a sip or two missing from it.
“Do you want the rest of mine?” Alessia offered Mary and Maya, pulling a face in disgust.
“Come on, baby, can you not just have another sip?” Mary asked you, and you shook your head straight away.
“I’m gonna be sick if I have anymore. That was the worst thing I’ve ever drank.” You stated and Mary laughed before resting a hand on your lower back, rubbing it in circles.
“Come on, Less, you’ve got to finish it.” Mary encouraged Alessia, whose jaw had fallen to the floor.
“So I have to finish mine, but as soon as Y/N says she can’t finish hers it’s okay?” Alessia asked, and Mary nodded.
“Of course, I’m not having a sick girlfriend.” Mary said and you nuzzled your head on her shoulder, smirking cheekily at Alessia.
“This is so unfair.”
“You alright there, Maya?” You asked the young girl who was searching frantically for a drink.
“Maya, tell the camera what you think.” Mary suggested and Maya sat down on the bed.
“It went up my nose when I started laughing. Because your…” Maya made a gulping sound which made you giggle. “…was really loud.”
“My gulp?” Mary fell back in laughter, pulling you down with her. “I quite liked it. I didn’t find it spicy.”
“I can feel it in my throat.” You told them and Alessia hummed in agreement.
“I can too. Like just there.” Alessia agreed, pointing to her throat.
“That wasn’t bad.” Maya stated as you clapped your hands in front of Alessia’s face, startling her because she was completely zoned out.
Alessia punched your arm, and you whimpered in pain, gathering Mary’s attention.
“Alessia, don’t punch her.” Mary lectured less as you run your arm in pain.
“She started it.” Alessia fired back, sending you glares. If looks could kill, you’d be on the floor dead.
“I thought that was quite easy. Challenge complete, no? I think you two failed because you haven’t finished yours. Clearly russos aren’t good with hot shots. It’s a good thing you’ll be an Earps soon.” Mary changed the subject otherwise you and Alessia would have kept arguing.
“I can’t wait to be an Earps.” You whispered, mainly to Mary as she looked down at you smiling before pressing your lips on hers.
As much as you loved kissing Mary, it being one of your favourite things to do, this time was different.
All you could taste was the drink on Mary’s lips and tongue.
“I’m gonna throw up.” You managed to get out as you ran to the bathroom once more, throwing your head in the toilet.
Mary came and rubbed your back, comforting you.
“Fuck. I’m never having one of them again.” You told Mary as you leant your back against the wall.
“You alright, sis?” Alessia asked, genuinely concerned, a whole juxtaposition to how she normally is.
“Yeah, I’m alright. I’m traumatised of kissing Mary again now.” You said, lying a bit just to see Mary’s reaction.
“What? You don’t want to kiss me again? Nope. I’m not having that.” Mary panicked, immediately grabbing her toothbrush and toothpaste to wash her mouth.
“Baby, I’m joking. Calm down.” You rested a hand on Mary’s cheek, rubbing it.
“I really want to kiss you.” Mary announced and you sent her a sympathetic smile.
“Brush your teeth and then you can.”
“Oh my god. You’ve just kissed her and now you want to kiss her again. I swear to god, you’re gonna have no face by the time you get married. Do you know what? I’m gonna go call Luca. At least he’ll talk to me without someone kissing him, unlike you. I’m his favourite sister as well so I know he’ll pick up.” Alessia said, grabbing her phone and began to walk out.
“Less?” You called out and she turned to face you. “Sorry to tell you but Luca’s told me I’m his favourite.”
“Go away, Y/N.” Alessia snapped, slamming the door behind her.
Mary had erratically brushed her teeth, immediately bringing you in for a passionate kiss as soon as she had finished.
Her hands roamed your body and landed on the hem of your shirt playing with it before sliding up and over your head, your lips parting for a second before connecting again.
Mary picked you up, your legs wrapping round her hips as she attacked your neck, light moans leaving your lips.
She began walking into the bedroom but your body tensed as you looked at it.
Mary felt your body tense up and stopped kissing your neck to look up at you.
“Baby, what’s wrong?” Mary asked, her eyes following your gaze as hers widened.
Maya was laid on the bed, watching tv with a smile on her face, knowing exactly what she was doing.
“Maya, you fucking cockblock!”
#woso community#woso x reader#woso#woso imagine#womens football#woso fanfics#mary earps#mary earps x reader
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𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘶𝘮𝘱𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘴 (pt 4) — 𝘚𝘪𝘮𝘰𝘯 𝘙𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘺
pt 1 pt 2 pt 3 pt 4 pt 5
𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘹 𝘤𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘢𝘯!𝘧𝘦𝘮!𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳
𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺 — 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘯 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵 𝘚𝘪𝘮𝘰𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨.
𝘸𝘤 — 3.4k
𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦 — 𝘧𝘭𝘶𝘧𝘧, 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘴𝘵
𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴/𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘴 — 𝘴𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘸𝘸 𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘳𝘳𝘳𝘯𝘯𝘯, 𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘬𝘦𝘺 𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴, 𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘣𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘧𝘭𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨
note: omg okay i know this is so short but i promise i will be posting the next part (which is quite long!) in a couple of daysss so here's some more flirting and angst for you!! >< also thank you for all the love and support for this series :,))
you couldn’t keep your sworn promises against Simon for long.
the next day, you were already back in the basement of the church for another support group meeting. it was mid-day, and you were showing the progress of your individual projects in the past week.
Kate had forced you and Simon, re-masked and clad in black, to sit side by side, leaving you itching with exasperation, because if you thought it couldn’t get more awkward than when you first met, it was so much worse now.
he made more progress with the sewing project than you had believed he could—a third of his box already finished, you realized, as he presented its contents to the rest of the girls who practically cooed over him.
they almost went ballistic when he pulled out your old hello kitty pouch you lended to him. his glare boring into the side of your face, you scrambled to explain that he borrowed the materials from you—including the pink pouch. they all deflated, the smiles dropping from their faces, and you bit a snort at the way Simon relaxed back into his seat.
he really hates attention, you noted, then wiped the thought from your mind, because since when were you keeping mental notes on him?
the rest of the meeting continued on, dull and boring, till Kate applauded the group for its progress and announced that you all would be going on a little field trip to the pumpkin patch a couple streets down.
your mouth went stale. pumpkin carving. you almost forgot you’d be sharing that activity with Simon as well.
you glanced at him, finding him already gazing at you, eyes quickly flitting away when your eyes met his. you cocked your brow at him.
weirdo, you thought, though it came out half-hearted and made your stomach feel all warm and gooey.
you attached yourself to Maya and Sarah the whole walk there, Simon a few steps behind, and flanked by some girls who were eager to get in a few words with him. Iris, a married woman, was one of them, you noticed with a little burst of annoyance.
looking back at him from over your shoulder, Iris flush by his side, you sent Simon a nasty glare and his eyes only narrowed, head tilting like he was confused, but your head snapped forward with a hmph, promptly ignoring him again.
you practically stomped the rest of the way, Sarah and Maya locked in conversation with a couple other girls who paid no attention no mind to your strange behavior. by the time you neared the farmer’s market, your outburst had dwindled, and you were conversing with the girls intermittently, craning your head to get a look at the little pumpkin patch.
side-stepping to catch a glimpse of the market’s vegetable booth outfront, you were totally unaware of the biker making his way down the sidewalk from behind, you would’ve crashed into him if a strong arm didn’t hoist you over by your waist.
you shrieked as the biker whizzed by without a second thought, clutching at the arm snug around your waist.
“careful,” Simon hissed, voice rough and throaty in your ear as he set you down. he smoothed your shirt of the creases he had just created, touch warm against your clothes.
scrambling from his grip, you mumbled a meek sorry, flushed with embarrassment as the other girls checked on your well-being.
“are you okay?” Sarah asked, face flicked with concern and you just nodded quickly, throat tight when you noticed Maya’s eyes dart from you to Simon (who you stubbornly ignored) then back to you again.
Sarah followed Maya’s gaze and strung an arm through yours, pulling you close between her and Maya when she whispered, “what’s going on between you and Simon?”
“nothing,” you hissed, knowing how unconvincing it seemed.
Maya eyed you carefully. “what happened when you went home together last night?”
your throat only tightened at the memory. “literally nothing. he was kind enough to offer me a ride home and i invited him inside for one drink. just one.”
she nodded slowly, but looked completely unconvinced.
Sarah added with a sincere look, “i thought you didn’t… you know, hang out with guys.”
you grimaced. “i don’t.”
she pursed her lips, sharing a look with Maya, though it wasn’t unkind.
“i’m happy for you,” she said with a light smile, patting your cheek. “i’m happy you’re friends with Simon now.”
you bit back a groan. “we’re not—”
Kate shushed you from the head of the group and you jolted, completely unaware that she had been talking at all. you screwed your lips together at the glare she sent you, sending her a ferocious one of your own, and her face twitched with brief amusement before turning back to the group and dishing out some instructions.
it was simple—you’d be helping some kids from the local daycare pick out their own pumpkins to paint. not so simple was the part where you’d be helping in pairs.
moping, you trudged over to stand beside Simon, still refusing to look at him, and filed into a line on the sidewalk to cross the street. at the farmer’s market, some kids were running around, screaming and shouting and squealing as they played.
you let the smile creep onto your lips at the sight of one of the little girls in a yellow raincoat and big, red rain boots even though it was sunny as ever outside. she ran past you, slowing with a shy look, curls bouncing against her head, before she ran off again to play with her friends.
soon enough, the group dispersed, moving around with the daycare teachers to help the kids. you stood by Simon for a long moment in silence. taking one glance at the hulking man, covered in black, to decide that he needed to take off the surgical mask.
you pointed to your face, mouthing mask, and you were dismayed when his eyes narrowed, slowly shaking his head.
you rolled your eyes. “it’s for the children.”
he sighed, ripping the black mask from his face and crumpling it into his hand, shoving it into his pocket.
you nodded in approval, moving to help one boy struggling to pick up a pumpkin half the size of him. with the softest words you could muster, and a gentle tap on his shoulder, you willed him to move over and let you do it. he relented, and you picked up the pumpkin with a huff of breath, carrying it over to the pick-up truck on the side of the road where you were instructed to put the pumpkins. the boy happily skipped beside you, singing out a thank you as you pushed the gourd across the bed of the truck, smiling after him as he ran off again.
looking back to where your partner was, you bit back a snort at the sight of a couple kids shyly prodding at him, two running circles around him, another hanging off his outstretched arm.
he stooped down to pick up a big pumpkin when a little girl pointed to one, the little girl in a yellow raincoat and curls, clapping with excitement when he did it with only one hand. the kids bumbled after him as he walked toward you, your heart swelling at the relaxed, content look on his face, saying something to a little boy tugging on his pant leg, another girl clutching at his hand.
when he stopped in front of you, eyes flitting between you and the pumpkin in his hand, you let out a soft oh, snapping out of whatever daze the sight had put you in, and you hoisted up the heavy thing, struggling to push it into the bed of the pick-up truck. two arms came flush around your shoulders and helped you lift it, chest flush to your back and his breath by your ear as he shoved it back so it knocked against the other pumpkins.
“thanks,” he said, voice gravel and breath warm on your neck before he stepped back. your throat closed up, unable to choke anything back except a low hum and nod.
he let the kids drag him back towards the pumpkin patch, a couple of them demanding that they hang from his arms. in response, he held out an arm, and two boys latched on, swinging with squeals as he walked.
your stomach roiled. shit. he was good with kids. in a silent, calm sort of way.
nothing like your own father, an faraway voice ruminated with awe, and you immediately quelled the thought, the fast thud of your heart in your throat deafening. shit. was this what he meant by maturity?
as much as you tried to rid yourself of the thoughts, it was almost impossible, spiraling around your mind as you helped the kids till they had effectively filled the back of the pick-up truck with an array of different shaped gourds of varying colors.
meeting in a big circle to close the event, the pack of daycare kids said their thank yous and bid their goodbyes, that little girl in a yellow raincoat hanging off Simon even as the rest of the kids were following their teachers back to the little daycare. he had to pry her from him, saying something in a low tone that you couldn’t make out from across the circle, till she nodded with hesitancy, sending him one last bashful look, before scurrying off to join the line of kids filing down the sidewalk from the farmer’s market.
beside you, Maya stared at Simon with a sort of reverence you had never seen on her before, and your heart almost shattered at the sight. curling an arm around her shoulders, her eyes dragged from Simon to you with a confused look. you just returned it with a light smile, beginning a ramble about the events of the day that Sarah happily chimed into, adding her own stories and thoughts with an animated nature.
Kate thanked your group for all the help, dismissing you to the rest of your sunday evenings, and you startled when she made a beeline directly for you, plucking you from the conversation as the rest of the girls began discussing where they’d be eating dinner.
“walk with me,” Kate said sharply, a tight smile on her lips as she looped her arm into yours. you had no time to protest before she was tugging you down a path through the pumpkin patch, away from the rest of the group.
when you looked back, you pretended to not notice Simon staring after you, a couple other girls, including Iris, still flush by his side.
“i heard from a little birdie that you and Simon have been getting along well,” Kate said, and you rolled your eyes.
“i know you’re talking about Sarah, Kate.”
she grimaced by your side. “right. Sarah. she told me.”
you gave her a long look. “i know you asked Sarah, Kate.”
she ignored you this time, stopping when you were at the edge of the forested park beyond the farmer’s market. you were ready for her to begin lecturing you—commanding you to explain yourself and the strange, tense atmosphere between you and Simon…
instead, she asked, a foreign tinge of plea in her words, “how is Simon doing?”
you blinked at her. “how is he doing?”
she nodded. “how is he doing?”
“i…” with a murky feeling of guilt, you realized hadn’t really taken the time to consider it. “i think he’s alright.”
she sighed out, fishing around her pocket, pulling a cigarette from it, and a lighter from her breast pocket.
“do you mind?”
you just shrugged. you were used to the smell from working at the auto shop, your dad going through a pack a day bent over cars to complete an endless list of repairs. it’s no wonder he passed so soon.
pushing the old, stale thoughts away, you pried Kate. “why? is everything alright?”
she took a long drag, politely turning her head to the side to exhale out against the chilly fall air. “just between you and me hon’, i worry for him.”
you rolled your eyes, pushing her shoulder playfully. “he’s a big boy. i’m sure he can handle himself.”
she gave you a wistful smile. “something like that.”
your brow quirked, eyeing the tired look on her features carefully. “sounds like there’s stuff you’re not telling me, Kate.”
she sighed long and heavy. “i was the one who kind of forced him to do this thing. i’m surprised he hasn’t walked away screaming bloody murder already.”
your brows raised slightly. “why’s that?”
she just chuckled in a dark, mirthless tone, brushing back her hair. “s’just not in his nature. he refused to go to a personal therapist, so i offered the group thing to him instead. i honestly think he’s just doing it to make me happy. or maybe to make me finally leave him alone.”
you swallowed hard, thinking back to the dirty blonde man, tall with a heavy build, skin surprisingly warm to the touch. you weren’t foreign to the same beliefs, avoiding personal, one-on-one therapy your entire life because the vulnerability of it was too…
you grimaced.
“has he told you anything?” she asked suddenly, and you frowned.
“what do you mean?”
“has he opened up at all?” she rephrased, and you blinked at her, unsure what to say.
“he has,” was all you confirmed, and she nodded, looking a bit relieved.
“good. good to hear.”
with that, the conversation ended, and you walked a step behind Kate to the girls who were still chattering about dinner and, somewhat unsurprisingly, Simon nowhere in sight. though the vacancy of his presence still felt eerie.
Sarah pulled you to her, pointing down the street, saying they’d be going to a comfy little joint known for soups and sandwiches, but after your conversation with Kate, your stomach roiled with discomfort. waving them off, you promised that you’d join next time, feeling guilty from all their kind remarks—no, come with us, no, we’ll miss you—but you took off in the direction of the church, ready to rid yourself of all the crawling, creeping sensations of your body after the day’s events.
in time, the familiar white church emerged from the mist, looking ominous in the foggy weather. you swallowed, pushing through its double doors, a thick, eerie silence muffling any sound in chapel except for your footsteps.
quickly, you descended down the stairs, and strode down the hallway, opening the doors to the meeting room and making a beeline for your box of costumes. Simon’s had already been taken, you noted, assuming he had made early headway back to the church for the materials. with a shiver, you carefully laid out each costume over one another into the box and snapped the lid shut, shivering violently from that draft that passed through the basement as you picked up the box and turned when—
“cold?”
you screamed. a real, long scream ripped from your throat as you scrambled backwards and crashed into a chair, dropping your box that split in half, its contents spilling out over the floor again. you tumbled to the floor, and once the world stopped spinning, you groaned out, forehead against the carpet.
“what the fuck, Simon,” you hissed, pushing yourself slowly off the ground. Simon, remasked, was already half-way to you, holding out a tentative hand that clenched and unclenched in the open air.
you just held up a hand. “don’t.”
he nodded, straightening, before edging closer to you with an open palm.
you sighed out, taking his outstretched hand and letting him pull you to your feet. you rubbed at your shoulder that had slammed against a chair in your fall.
“are you alright?” he asked slowly, voice thick and rough, and you just let out a tight laugh.
“m’fine. don’t worry,” you said, stooping down to pick up the costumes, wincing at the new soreness of your body.
Simon immediately pushed away your hands, crouching down to lay the costumes in your box, so you moved to right the chairs again. but he was over in a flash, doing it for you.
huffing with frustration, you chided him, “Simon.”
but he ignored you, standing up two other chairs before moving back to the halloween costumes strewn over the floor, careful with each one.
“you have really got to stop scaring me like that,” you grumbled, watching him put the lid back on the box, snapping down the sides.
he paused, stock still a moment. when he didn’t respond, and didn’t even move, you stared at the back of his head with a new confusion.
“Simon—?”
“sorry,” he said under his breath, still not moving.
you blinked, shifting closer to him, and edged around so you could see the eerily blank expression on his face as he stared forward on an untrained point.
you dropped to a crouch beside him. “is everything alright—?”
“i didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
you stared at the side of his face, your jaw dropping with dismay, then closing again. “it’s okay. you didn’t mean to scare me.”
he shook his head, dark eyes finally moving over to hold your gaze. “i meant yesterday.”
with that, you flushed. “oh.”
he meant last night.
“i shouldn’t have said all that stuff,” he grumbled, avoiding your gaze now.
his words were sharp. “just forget that i said anything.”
a cutting ache speared your chest. forget everything he said?
“you didn’t mean it?” you squeaked, unsure what to say.
he stood, taking your box with him. you straightened slowly, taking the box from his hands. his eyes were on yours but you felt like he was looking straight through you.
“yeah. none of it.”
weakly, you nodded, your whole body feeling heavy as you left the meeting room. a murky, damp feeling weighed down your chest.
you both walked out the church in silence, Simon just a step behind you, and the mist against your skin enveloped you in a bone-chilling suffocation.
you were hyper aware of Simon’s gaze on you as he watched you pop open your trunk and shove the box of costumes inside. closing it, you turned to him, his own box of costumes in his hands. you would’ve laughed at the sight, such a big, burly military man and his own box of sewn items, the pink, hello kitty pouch stacked on top the lid, but the laughter couldn’t find you through the mist.
you don’t need a ride? you had offered, but he had just shook his head, half-turning from you as he jerked his head down the road. s’just a fifteen minute walk.
you had grimaced, pressing, but what if it starts raining?
he had just shrugged. don’t worry about me.
then you had said goodbye, watching him walk away and into the mist. the problem was, whether or not you chose it, half of you had started worrying for him all the time.
you slid into your car, letting the heavy feeling consume you. turning on the ignition, your grip tight on the steering wheel, you bit back tears when the first drops of rain fell onto your windshield. you flicked on the fog lights and backed up out of the parking lot, pulling onto the road, rain coming down quicker now. by the time you reached your townhouse, which was just a block away, it was pelting, and the tears were streaming down your face.
you clutched at your chest, rubbing circles over it like Simon taught you. it didn’t seem to work nearly as much as when you were in his arms. the strong warmth of him pressed into you. his soft words by your ear.
leaning forward in your seat, your forehead came to rest against the horn of the steering wheel, uncaring for your tears that ran down the leather and the loud blare that cut through the evening, hoping the downpour would drown out the sound.
yeah. poor simon's walking home through the rain. he's probably crying too 😇
next part coming very soon you guys!!! happy halloweenings!!! (my senior halloween day is this thursday..... my friends and i are going as 2010 justin bieber and bringing selena gomez cardboard cutouts bc i think that's hilarious)
taglist: @kenma-izhu @actuallyhiswife @froggielottiee @neenieweenie @delaynew @ilovehyperfixating @vxnilla-hxrddrugs @tomorrowseverything @moonlqths @ivybeeloved @babygirl-riley @keiva1000 @arminarlertssword @crowbird @jasonloveclub @karurururu @embers-of-alluring @newsies-pape-girl @suhmie @amberpanda99 @mystsee @cosmoscoffee
@hunterofhonor @wawuwe @kunikku @corvusmorte @hearts4sky @aloudplace @justletmelivethanks @shadowdaddysposts @leclercdream @ayanokomu @thedevillovesflowers @thisuserloveshalloween @soundsfunbutno @enfppixie @tired-bi-ass @http-paprika @xaestheticalien @vonev @garfieldssocks @sapphire-read @moonstonedeluluere @killergoddess97 @cassiecasluciluce @xxkay15xx @mrflyingbanana03 @magneto-was-fucking-right @riverbutghost@palomaxaxaxa @hobiespick
#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost cod#ghost angst#ghost mw2#simon ghost riley#simon riley x you#simon riley#ghost x reader#ghost x you#ghost fluff#simon riley fluff#simon riley angst#call of duty#call of duty modern warfare#call of duty modern warfare 2#cod mw2#codmw2fanfic
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Covet: Chapter 11 (Sneak Peek)
a/n: this is only half of what this scene is in chapter 11... buuuut, this is a scene that has been imagined for a hot damn second... and i kind of went crazy with it when it came time to write it. soooo, here's a (long ass) sneak peek of the scene that's been planned as a reunion of sorts for our two (angsty) romantics <3
i hope it's enough to tide you over until chapter 11 drops. and, ohhhh friends.... chapter 11..... it's a doozy (that includes something that many have been itching for... what could it be?)
buuut, until then, here is your little taste (🤭) of chapter 11!!
Warnings: smut (18+ MINORS DNI); oral (f! receiving); pregnancy; insecurities; anxiety; slight jealousy, i guess?; pregnancy hormones out the wah-zoo lmao (emotions, libido, etc)
-🌼🌼🌼-
“Oh, so you didn’t get it out of your system with Maya that night?” You clipped, not ready to just ignore the fact that you’d had to suffer through that shit. How damn livid you’d been.
“I was angry, and she was there for me,” he explained, before sighing deeply. You could imagine he was shaking his head with the action. “But I was thinking of you. You and your beautiful fucking body that’s growing my kid.”
God. You felt your core flex and continue to drip with arousal at his words. You were not in the mood to be the one in the right anymore. You didn’t want to be smart about your choices. . . you wanted his mouth on you and you wanted to let him do whatever the fuck he had in mind.
It would be one time.
And. . . . it would technically be him helping you to benefit the baby. . . the less stressed you were, the less stress the baby felt. And God only knew how fuckin’ stressed you were lately.
And there was only one way–one person–you wanted to relieve that right now.
Fuck morality.
“Who’s to say you’ll want me when you actually see me like this?” You genuinely wondered.
You couldn’t believe you were actually giving this fucking idea any substance. There really was no way it could end well.
But your thoughts just kept trailing to how it could end well. . . very well. . . With you moaning his name as you finished against his tongue or around his cock . . .just for tonight. And, dirty as it would be to her, technically Maya did tell him to help with whatever you needed, so it wasn’t entirely against her wishes.
Although, you were one thousand percent sure this was not what she meant. . . . at all.
“Try me,” he challenged, voice rasping with the two daring words.
You were in no place to turn him down for such a thing. Your body was in no place to deny his help much longer. So, with wobbly legs and weak knees, you stood up. Your ass tingled, hurting just a bit and you were trying so hard to not somehow slip on any water on the shower floor. You decided to lean against the opposite wall, holding on to the plastic bar built into the middle of the longer wall, adjacent to him.
It was clicking that he was about to see your naked body in a way he’d never seen it before. . . you needed to make sure you looked as good as you could with puffy eyes from crying and a red face from the heat of the shower.
So, you did what you could and bent one wet leg at the knee, thankfully feeling silky smooth from your shave. You worked to accentuate your curves, in a body that didn’t always feel like your own anymore. You wanted to cross your arms over your chest, but knew the pressure would hurt like a bitch if you did that. The other option was tucking them behind your back, so that was what you did, holding the plastic bar in the wall with both hands, pushing your chest up a bit with the action.
You couldn’t conceal the whine that slipped from your lips when you crossed your thighs, pushing them together, adding a little bit of pressure where you needed it so badly.
But, no matter how much your body felt literally pulled to him, you couldn’t help asking. . . “Are you sure about this?”
“Um, yes,” he said, no doubt in his tone at all. Though, after he said it, he paused, ready to await your words. “. . .Are you?”
Guilt was what you should’ve felt in this moment. But, right then and there, guilt was as far out of the window as it could’ve possibly been. This felt real. Natural. Nowhere near wrong any longer – only right. So fucking right.
So, if he thought it was okay, so did you.
“Yes,” you breathed, whining on the word without warning, your legs having rubbed together once more. Your swollen chest was heavy with each breath you took, waiting for him.
“Let me see you,” he beckoned.
Needing the curtains gone from between you, but scared to move and end up falling, you huffed, snorting a bit at the thought of falling again. Pregnancy and POTs were not a good combination for a clumsy-ass like yourself.
“I’m afraid I’ll land on my fuckin’ ass if I move,” you explained, a little giggle following the words. “Um, c-can you–?”
And before you could even finish the request, the thin barrier between you suddenly vanished and. . . standing before your naked, wet body. . . was him.
Your eyes didn’t instantly find his face, suddenly shy in front of the man who’d seen you naked so many times before. So, you focused fully on his body. He was still fully clothed, but completely there, right in front of you.
And, from what you could tell from the outline of his dick in his dark jeans, he was definitely wanting you. He wanted to help in this special way. . .
“Oh my god,” he rasped, so low in his throat.
Instantly, you snapped your glance from where you’d been eyeing his body to see his face. He was staring at your legs, which still looked as they had before the baby, for the most part.
But, very slowly, his eyes trailed from your legs, all the way to your midsection – a part of you that had definitely changed. Round as could be at 17 weeks along, his expression became primal; his stare, so hungry for what his eyes were feasting on that you felt it with every harsh beat of your heart.
You felt extremely vulnerable in his presence, under his gaze. Felt weak at the sound of his voice. The way you were bared completely to him, and him liking what he saw. . . made the blood in your veins red hot.
The blush crept up on every part of you – your cheeks and chest, burning. You felt yourself becoming restless for him, your heart beating so quick you felt almost nauseous at the way his eyes had darkened. His lips stayed pursed as his jaw flexed. You felt your chest react further, as your nipples peaked at his nearness. As if sensing it, his eyes moved to watch your fuller chest, your breathing hitching on each breath.
Time was moving in slow motion.
And the way he bit his lip, as he finally locked his dark eyes with yours, would forever be etched in your memory.
“Holy fuck,” he breathed. “You are so—.”
The heavy beat of your heart was lodged in your throat, your breath catching. “Kiss me, Jake.”
And without question, he was stepping over the ledge of the bathtub, still fully clothed, until his boots were sloshing in the shallow puddle of water that swooshed to the drain. His hands found your body soon, chilly against your heated skin. He held your waist the best he could with the new addition of the baby bump, but still managed to hold you in such a way that you felt like he was in charge. The way he held you reminded you that you were nothing more than putty in his strong hands.
He started leaning in, his grip on you, so firm, steady, sure. . . .
The last time you’d seen him so close to you had been far too long ago. The night in the kitchen when you’d spilt the water, it had been too dark – and you’d been turned away from him. But, you were not turned away right now. Quite the opposite.
No, right now, you could see every detail of his plush, pink lips as he leaned in further to you. Your heart fluttered in your chest.
You were ready to feel his lips on yours.
He was close enough for you to see the stubble coming in above his lip. Though, suddenly, his hands dropped from around your waist and his eyebrows dipped as he started backing away.
No no no no no please –.
“I–I can’t–,” he shook his head, now drenched from the spray of the shower. You followed his action, backing up, too, your eyes looking over his body as he stood before you, unmoving. Just far enough away to not touch each other.
He wasn’t getting out completely, but he’d distanced himself.
Was he already regretting this? God, your heart started to split in your chest. . . you’d opened yourself completely up, only for him to decide against this – against you.
“Do you not want me?” You asked, voice mixed with hesitation and hurt. Your line of sight landed on your own feet, refusing to look at him. “Because, fuck, Jake – I told you! I told you we shouldn’t have– but now you have me fucking shaking and — goddammit, Jacob! It’s not fair for you to get me to admit those things and then bail as soon as you–!”
“Y/n,” he growled your name, commanding your eyes to land on his. His stare was no different than before. The irritation was flaring, again, though. Just a bit. You could tell. He stepped closer by one step. “I’m not going to fucking bail. I told you I wanted to please you and I plan on keeping my damn promise. I want to taste you so badly. . . I just– ugh.”
Your pulse was pounding in your ears, your chest hot and your heat clenching at nothing. . . You didn’t know how to respond.
You continued to buzz with anticipation that wouldn’t dissipate in the dense, humid air of the shower. Doing the only thing you could do, you decided to admire what was in front of you.
His shirt was opened to the middle of his abdomen on what you knew to be a chilly December evening, daring him to catch a damn cold.
But. . . the sight made you anything but cold–no, seeing his perfectly toned chest heaving and soaking wet. . . it made your entire body flame. His shirt was light blue, the water soaking through the material to make it nearly transparent. It gave you a glimpse at everything beneath his shirt. . . You saw his toned pecs that you needed to put your hands on again. You needed to feel the smooth skin of his chest–with your hands, tongue. . . anything.
Needed to feel him.
So, you did what your body told you to do at that moment.
Taking one wary step forward, you reached your hand out slowly, letting him stop you if he needed to. But, he didn’t stop you. When you glanced up at his face to read his reaction, he was watching your hand move, mouth agape at the action. You could feel his warm breath on your cheek as you took one more step towards him. Without any more thought, you placed your delicate hand on the exposed part of his tanned chest. And, daring to feel more, you slid your palm underneath his button-down shirt to feel one of his toned pecs.
His breath caught at the motion.
It felt like home to be touching him like this again.
His chest flexed under your hand with the sharp intake of breath. Your breath was choppy, too, not daring to breathe too harshly to scare him away. This moment felt so eerily similar to a moment so long ago – that damn game night. The moment you’d been dared by a stupid ass card game to touch him.
But this time–this time felt worlds different.
There was history–a baby–between the two people in this moment of time and you knew how to read his body.
So, it was no surprise to you when he took a step forward, nearly meeting the front of your body with his. You knew it was going to happen before it did; you knew that his hand would reach up to touch your chest as well.
You watched his hand as he followed through. Though, he didn’t touch your breast like you expected. No, he balanced his hand right above your heart, where it beat furiously for him.
“Jake,” you begged, his name saying everything you couldn’t say. Your thighs rubbed together of their own accord, desperate. “Please.”
And there it was. His hand immediately went to hold your full, sore breast. It was like a weight was lifted off your chest, literally. You were finding that the only relief your chest could find was from his touch.
Your legs continued to work at creating friction with every movement of his gentle massage on your breast. The way your chest heaved, nipple so sensitive and taut beneath his palm, your body was pleading for more. Still. You needed more. His hand moved away from the nipple and he held the underside of your left breast.
“Jake,” you were whining, outright. It was pitiful as hell. But – you couldn’t give two flying fucks.
“I–I can’t kiss your lips,” he explained, voice gravelly and low above you, floating directly to your ear. You looked up, waiting for him to continue. There was more he wanted to say, it was obvious. “That’s–I have to keep something that is unique and sacred to my relationship. Does that make sense?”
“Yes.” It did. It made complete sense and you admired his feeble attempt at saving something for her. . . but, you couldn’t help that it cracked your heart the slightest bit that you weren’t able to feel his lips against yours.
The tears were welling in your eyes all on their own–couldn’t stop them if you tried. Although, you couldn’t tell if they were from baby hormones or an honest result of the new crease left in your heart at him so obviously not being yours.
He belonged to her – not to you. And the lack of kissing was a painful, blatant reminder of that.
Kissing him had been something so normal and familiar only a few months ago, you could have kissed him any time you wanted (well, almost any time. . . but still). And . . . you’d given that up.
Given him up.
So what could he do?
“What can you do?” Your voice broke with the wetness in your throat, a tear stupidly trickled down your face.
His grip on your breast stayed firm, his hand kneading the supple flesh just right. “You okay, honey?” He asked, meeting your question with his own. He reached a hand up to hold your cheek and swipe a few more stray tears. “Shhh,” he hushed gently as his hand still worked to soothe your heavy chest.
You sniffled, body sparking, growing goosebumps rapidly at the way he was stimulating you so deliciously. Your thighs worked hard to ease the throb between your legs. Playing it off the best you could, you offered him a half-assed response. “Don’t ask me why the tears are happening–it’s–it’s the baby hormones,” you sniffed again, willing the tears to go away.
Thankfully, they did. And, after they’d subsided, he went to touch your other breast, your hand still on his chest, now clawing at his skin with each measured press of his hand at your aching breasts. Your hand trailed up to hold his neck, thumb smoothing at the flesh behind his ear. God, you’d missed holding him and you really loved that spot behind his ear. . . couldn’t explain it.
“How does it feel?” He soothed, licking his lips once at a sigh you emitted with one particular graze to your tight nipple.
“So fucking good,” you grit out, your hand gripping gently at the roots of his long hair, darkened and soaking wet from the water flowing from the showerhead. “How do you know how to–? They hurt when anyone else holds them. . . but not with you– how?”
“I don’t know,” he replied with a hoarse chuckle. “I have been doing research on how to–,” he coughed, his other hand coming to join the one on your chest, doing his best to give equal treatment to both of your tits. And dammit if he wasn’t doing the best fucking job at it.
You gasped a whine at the additional pressure, his dark eyes finding yours as soon as you’d made the sound. The smile you gave him was bashful, cheeks flaring a deep pink in the soft moment.
He continued his words as he worked his hands so intentionally against your swollen, aching chest. “I’ve been reading on how to pleasure pregnant women– what to do to make them feel better. . . since your body’s changing and shit. And you told me that your tits have been sore, so I’ve been reading on how to help that specifically. I didn’t think I’d get to try it out on you – but, here we are,” he smirked, his eyes connecting with yours once more as he raised a brow.
Didn’t think he’d ‘get to try it out on you’.
You blushed, his eyes going back to watching your tits as he softly swirled a thumb on your nipple, you moaned, following his eyes with your own. God bless America. Watching him do it was worse. Your nerves were on fire and you felt your muscles tighten at your core, needing his touch in a million places at once.
“And, when pregnant women have sore tits, it apparently helps to massage them,” he continued, informing you of his research. “So, I thought I’d try that.”
“What else did you find in your research?” You asked, watching his hands move just so, his thumbs rubbing purposefully light circles around and over your nipples. Fuuuck yes.
“For sore tits or overall pleasure?” He pondered, eyebrow raising again as he caught your line of sight.
“Pleasure,” you breathed, feeling his hands come to a devastating halt on your chest, smoothing over your sides before he dropped them.
Goddammit, Jake. Don’t stop.
“Well, I know that some pregnant women really like being touched and have a pretty high libido,” he paused, bringing his hands up to push his soaking wet hair back. Your hand dropped from behind his head. “But I also found that other pregnant women experience the exact opposite – have an aversion to sex.” He eyed you, squinting with a knowing smirk. “I could probably guess which type you are by how much you loved that just now, but . . . I want you to tell me. High libido or low?”
“Well,” you paused, your legs suddenly feeling like Jell-o. So, not wanting to fall or some shit, when he’d successfully pushed his hair back, you reached both hands up to wrap around the base of his head, your fingers working at your own massage on him. “I–I haven’t really felt a high libido for anyone but you. . . I don’t think I’d want it from anyone else right now. . . So, I don’t know what that makes me. High, maybe?” You pondered aloud, wanting his opinion of your predicament. “. . .If I only want you, a high libido for you?”
“Fuck. Are you serious?” You watched one hand reach between you to rub against the strain at his zipper. The other hand came to your hip, pulling you into him further.
He brought you as close as you could come with a new belly in the middle. He glanced down at the growing bump, his eyes gazing at it, so gently. He didn’t reach to touch it—not yet. . . Seeming to wait on you for permission, but not saying it. But. . . you just felt now was not the right time.
So, instead, you surveyed him.
The sight of him admiring your belly was almost too much to process. . . He was looking so carefully and affectionately — he got it. He felt it.
You sniffed, biding your tears the best you could. And at the sniff, his eyes flicked to you. . . His stare said something you thought daily.
That’s my baby, he seemed to say with only a simple twinkle in his eye. His dark irises became so light, his under eye circles seemed to disappear with the wonder in his stare.
He winked at you and sent you into a minor frenzy. As your heart worked to pick back up, he began moving his hand down to your ass to pay attention to the muscle you’d told him was sore earlier.
Your sighs filled the air, your senses overwhelmed by him. He rasped his next question, back on the topic from earlier, voice so low between the two of you. “You only want me?”
“Only you,” you confirmed, the honest words brushing against his face with your quiet, sighed response.
“So, if I were to be wanting to. . . help you, you know. . . you’d say you have a high libido?”
“So fucking high.”
“Thank fucking God,” he growled. And with one more push of his hand against himself, he moaned under his breath, and with one more squeeze to your ass, he grasped both of your hips, holding you to him tightly. Your belly, pressed between the two of you, still so foreign in a moment like this.
“Well, there are countless positions to try, but right now I can’t really–.”
“Don’t tell me you’re going to cut it off at all of the other shit, too,” you said, backing away from him, his hands dropping from you as you let go of his neck. “No kissing, so what’s next? What can’t you do? You never answered that.”
He started unbuttoning his sopping wet shirt. And when it was finally completely off, he reached up to drape it across the bar of the shower head. Your eyes tracked every. single. movement. The way his bicep rippled slightly with the stretch, the way his tanned abdomen flexed. . . every muscle, so beautiful in its prominence beneath his soft skin.
When he was back from his task and looking at you again, shirtless and solid as a brick wall, you couldn’t help but let your eyes wander. He cleared his throat, bringing your attention to his face once more. The smirk on his lips and the way his eyebrow was arched pissed you the fuck off. Was this amusing to him?
“You think it’s funny? How turned on I am and you can’t do a damned thing about it? Even though you led me to believe you could?”
“Who said I couldn’t?”
“You just said you can’t–.”
“You didn’t let me finish, y/n,” he reasoned. “I was going to say I can’t do that right now because I need to focus on you before we get to sex.”
‘Before we get to sex’. . . was he planning on . . . more?
Deciding to ignore that dangerous train of thought for the time being, you huffed, your arms still crossed at the top of your slightly rounded abdomen. “Well, I’m just confused.”
“The only thing I told you I can’t do is kiss your lips,” he reminded you, the calloused pad of his thumb coming up to briefly touch your plush lips. His eyes followed his action, your lips still pursed in annoyance as you challenged him with your expression and stance.
But you were wavering by the second, especially any time your eyes followed a drop of water from his shoulder, all the way to the waistband of his dark jeans. And every time you caught sight of the raging erection in his jeans. . .
“Y/n.”
Embarrassed and flushed, you flicked your eyes back to his face. You covered it up with indignance and frustration, your arms tightening in their position. “What, Jake?”
“I will do anything else you need,” he reassured, taking a tentative step towards you, boots clicking against the floor of the tub – where you’d managed to press yourself against the opposite wall of the shower. Your body betrayed you, your nipples once again peaking at his proximity. “And. . . I never said I can’t kiss other parts of your body. I can very much kiss you. . . elsewhere,” his eyes trailed to where your thighs were still pressed to relieve the persistent pulse of your center.
“Goddammit, Jacob,” you breathed with a roll of your eyes, arching yourself off of the wall towards him, just in time for him to meet you halfway. “You should have said that.”
His eyes bugged, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips until a bright white smile appeared in a laugh. “I tried! You didn’t let me.”
He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you tightly to him, your belly between you not letting you get quite as close as you used to.
“Then do something–please.”
He leaned forward, kissing behind your ear, right where you liked to kiss him. Then, he trailed his mouth down the column of your throat. He alternated pecks and open mouthed kisses, all the way to your shoulders, collarbones. . . You sighed, completely at his mercy. When he found your left breast, he gave it the most attention.
He licked around the sensitive nipple of your left breast, mirroring it with the right. At which, he elicited a moan from you that quickly progressed into a very whiny wail. “Fuck! Fuck, yes!” You cried, grasping his wet hair, not sure how to stop yourself if you fell – your shaking knees were bound to betray you, you could feel it. “This is so fucking wrong.”
“I. Don’t. Care,” he growled against the wet, supple skin of your breast. Every word, emphasized with a lick around your tender, hardened flesh.
Your train of thought was halted as you lost all thought in your brain at him full-on kissing your nipples, rather than giving them little kitten licks. No, now he was giving them kisses just like he would your mouth. Tongue and all. You were going to finish from this alone. . . You watched him in pure astonishment, his eyebrows knit in concentration. Then, as if things could get any worse (better?) he moaned – the action vibrated against your skin.
Your hips jolted up into his. Both of you groaned in unison at the contact, his hard dick enticing you as you felt it, only a thin barrier of clothing between you. . . You felt yourself flex at nothing, your thighs feeling the wet result of your arousal.
You knew you were damn close to finishing.
“Don’t cum yet,” he commanded, mumbling around your nipple.
Of course he knew you were on the verge.
Your nipples, usually so fucking sore, felt like they were made of sparklers, electric under his soft mouth. “‘M not done yet.”
“But– I can’t– a-ah-ah!,” you moaned, your body beginning to lose its fight to stand up straight, near to giving out. “I can’t hold on for much longer, Jake. Please. I promise I’ll cum again for you,” you swore, your fingers lacing tightly into his long, chestnut locks. “Please, baby.”
The pet name slipped from your lips without thought of repercussion. But, you didn’t really care that you’d let it slip since it didn’t seem to deter him. In fact, it had spurred him on even more.
“Not yet,” he bit out, his dark eyes meeting yours from their place at your full breasts.
Then, he winked, making you throb from that gesture alone. Fuck. You were a goner. You weren’t sure you could do as he said.
He went back to giving your body kisses, this time trailing back up to your face, little pecks covering every expanse of skin on your flushed face. Then, with one gentle kiss to the tip of your nose, he reached a hand up to hold your cheek.
His eyes held yours, open and vulnerable under his stare. So soft, he spoke to you with fervor in his tone. “I promise it’ll be better if you just wait, baby.”
Him returning the pet name didn’t help matters and only made you more desperate to fall apart.
So, rather than saying anything in return, you decided you’d try your best to follow his instructions. The only thing you could think to do was pinch your eyes shut and lay your head against the wall in frustration. “Fine,” you griped, hands tightening in his hair.
His mouth worked, venturing down once again, giving sloppy kisses from your collarbones all the way to your hips.
Once there, his hands replaced his mouth and started kneading at your hips as his mouth kept moving downward. His hands did a stellar job at holding you against the wall to prevent a fall.
His hold on you was strong and intent. And, while holding you, as he simultaneously massaged your hips. . . it was fucking heaven. His thumbs moved and pressed with purpose, working the tired muscle at your joints.
Fuck– he really had done his research to know that your hips could hurt like a bitch. And God knew yours did.
“My hips– Jake, god. . . thank you,” you sighed, your eyes closing at the way your body felt weightless under his hands and mouth.
Suddenly, his mouth was on your thighs, going back and forth between each leg until he reached your calves, his hands having to move down your legs with the action, still holding you upright as he knelt before you.
You opened your eyes, suddenly desiring to see him again, and you watched as he gave your legs unrelenting attention.
You watched in wonder as he very slowly started to work his way up to where you needed him most. But, once he got there, he gave you a look that made your knees buckle. . .
Then, he began on you, wasting absolutely zero time. There was no warning for his mouth meeting your searing hot, wet heat.
“Oh-oh-oh, J-Jake, f-fuck, yes!” You were nearly incoherent, but who would expect any different when you had Jake Kiszka making out with your wet and waiting pussy.
You’d been aching and waiting to have this again for so fucking long. . .The slew of curse words and moans that escaped your lips were useless, as they all came out as jumbled non-words. Utterly incoherent.
He was doing figure eights with his tongue, inching closer and closer to your opening, not even daring to edge towards your clit yet. Didn’t want you to fucking finish yet, goddammit.
You clenched your jaw, a growl coming from your lips, unable to do anything but watch him. Your eyes couldn’t dare leave the sight in front of you. He was taking his time to lap at your folds, soaked and fluttering for him. Your hips jerked forward, not able to stop the way his lips and tongue were setting you on fire to the point of retaliation.
You were trembling, your body not working on its own at all to hold you up. You were dependent on his death grip, now back on your hips, steadying you. He was pressing you so hard to the wall – you fucking hoped that he left bruises in the wake of his fingertips.
He kept on with his work for a bit longer before the water started turning cold. Fuck no.
And, of course, as if on cue, Jake backed away, wiping the corners of his mouth with the pad of his right thumb, his left hand still holding you to the wall.
“I swear to god, Jacob Thomas, if you fucking stop because of some cold wa– oh!”
He was back to licking up every bit of early release at your heat, flattening his tongue against your slit. You couldn’t catch a breath to finish what you were saying as he replaced his tongue with his fingers. He twirled his pointer and middle fingers through your soaking folds, until he met your entrance.
But, he stopped there.
And you knew why. He could tell you were cold – obviously shivering from more than his mouth and hands.
He could read you so well. You didn’t know if it was because of the connection you had to him by carrying his baby or what, but his instincts of your impending reactions came incredibly quick in recent days.
As he spoke, he kept his fingers at your core, spinning them to continue eliciting stimulation. The calluses of his fingertips were the perfect addition of friction to your swollen heat. . . you bit your lip, your head laying against the shower wall. You could barely concentrate on the fact that he’d begun talking.
“You’re shaking, y/n,” he clarified, as if you didn’t know.
Which, in true fashion, pissed you off. But, still hazy from his ongoing touch, you closed your eyes to center yourself.
When you leaned off of the wall the best you could, you opened your eyes. Instantly, it felt like you were going to slip with the movement. But, just when your foot dared to lose balance, his hold on your hip tightened. His fingers were still spinning against you, just on the precipice of entering you. So, you were sure he’d felt your walls flutter at the way he grasped you.
But, he didn’t say anything. He was too focused on your chilliness and your center, your body straight-up shaking from the now-cold water. Turning around, fingertips still tucked between your folds–still not fucking inside of you yet–, he switched the shower off.
“Jake!” You complained for no reason whatsoever. Well. . . you knew why you were complaining. You were worried. “Please, don’t let this be the–.”
“I’ve kept my fingers where they are to show you I’m not fucking done,” he responded, tone equally lacking tolerance for your attitude. “Can you just be fucking patient?”
“You’re not being patient!”
“How in the hell am I not being patient?!”
“Your voice tells me so,” you argued, hearing the way it sounded ridiculous as soon as you said it. You shook your head, body shaking from the cool nip of the bathroom air and your soaking wet body. He was also trembling, his body nearly as wet as yours.
He removed his fingers, further aggravating you. . . but you couldn’t stay mad for long as he was eliciting a gasp from you, yet again, within seconds. You watched as he removed his fingers from you, bringing them up to his mouth to suck your arousal from them. Closing his eyes and moaning in the process, his opinion of the way you tasted apparent.
Holy fucking hell.
“Taste good?” You asked, trying to sound snarky, but failing from the way your breath had escaped your lungs.
When his fingers left his mouth, he slowly started to stand, eyes connecting to and never leaving yours. His grip on your hip not giving up a single bit in the process. Once he was standing at full height again, he slid the shower curtain open, eyes staying hooked on yours.
He grabbed the towel hanging on the wall rack, momentarily leaving your gaze. But, as soon as he had the towel in his hands, his eyes snapped back to your waiting stare.
“Fucking delicious. You taste better than anything – always have. . . No other woman compares. But. . . it’s–it’s even more-so now,” he paused, releasing your hip and motioning for you to come towards his arms with the fluffy, waiting towel. You turned your back to him, his breath sliding through his teeth. “Your ass. . . Fuck it all.”
You giggled, feeling so incredibly wonderful for the first time in so long. Holding your arms out a little, he wrapped the towel at your back and handed you the rest to finish wrapping yourself.
He kept talking as you cinched the white towel around yourself, your breasts not appreciating the way you tucked the material tight around your chest. You winced at the feeling, pissed with the fact that your body was so sore.
Jake’s eyebrows knitted together in worry. “You okay?”
You nodded grumpily. “Yes,” you grumbled. “It’s my boobs. They just hurt.”
There was no missing the way he bit his lip, licking them soon after before he responded. “I’ll help you feel better, baby. Don’t worry.”
The buzzing in your veins was impossible to ignore, and you didn’t trust yourself to give a valid response with how lightheaded he was making you feel.
All you could do was nod, eyes hopefully communicating your excitement.
“Anyway, I read about the taste of a woman’s release, too. . . when women are pregnant, they have the tendency to taste sweeter than usual. And I can safely assure you, it’s the motherfucking truth,” his voice was hoarse with the last sentence. He kept on, locking his Amber-brown irises with yours. “And it’s fuckin’ erotic that you taste like the sweetest thing while you’re growing my baby. . . I can’t even explain it, y/n.”
You were positively twitching, your body threatening to unravel at any given moment. Now warm from the towel, you knew most of your shivering was solely from him.
“You don’t have to. I get how hot it is. Trust me,” you assured, your mouth dry from it hanging open at his words.
Swallowing purposefully, you shook your head before stepping out of the shower. And, once you’d towel-dried your body enough, you bent to tie the towel around your hair, turning away from him. As you made your way to the mirror, leaving him to check yourself, you realized just how red your face was. “Ah! God, Jake, I look like fuckin’ Elmo.”
He belly laughed at that, the sound making your tummy ignite in a swarm of happy butterflies. “No you don’t. Trust me,” he said, still giggling at what you’d said. “. . . ‘look like Elmo’. You’re fucking hilarious.”
Not able to help the laughter bubbling in your chest either, you turned to face him to enjoy the moment together.
Well—.
You first saw all of his soaked clothes, in a neat pile ready for the laundry, next to him. His belt, rolled tight on the toilet seat.
And, Jake, completely naked.
Your body reacted immediately, suddenly ready for the most. Your tone was way too eager when an inward ponder was spoken aloud. “Are we going to have sex?”
Dear God, y/n.
He smirked, shaking his head as he leaned past your naked body to get in the cabinet under the sink for the spare towel you kept underneath the sink. His fingers brushed your ass in the process and you didn’t want to discuss how quickly his touch heated your skin. You turned away from him, leaning towards the mirror to check out the two pesky spots on your face that threatened a pimple.
“Was that on purpose?” You shot the other question his way, followed by a statement of your own. “My ass has increased in size, just like the rest of me, so . . . wouldn’t be surprised if it wasn’t on purpose and just because it’s huge.”
“It was most definitely on purpose,” he replied, causing you to lean back so you could give him your full attention. The response made your cheeks blush crimson red, barely visible through your slowly lightening skin.
When you swiveled his way, you found him towel drying his hair, his dick still fully erect and tempting the fucking hell out of you. You bit your lip, and he continued on, eyes closed as he focused on drying his hair. God, he was so handsome. “And I don’t know what you mean by the rest of you increasing in size or huge. God. You aren’t huge by any standard, and all I’ve noticed increase in size are the three things I enjoy watching as they get bigger.”
You flushed, turning away once more to work on towel drying your own hair before you left the steamy room. You’d want the towel to wrap up in the chilly hallway.
Suddenly intrigued by the fact that you were talking so openly with him, you kept going. “The Three B’s? Boobs, belly, butt?”
Jake was laughing again at that, his snort unmistakable, even as you were bent awkwardly at the waist to towel dry your own hair. “Yes,” he chuckled, lighthearted. “That is correct. Did you make that up?”
Damn, I missed this, your mind absently trailed. He was everything wrapped in one.
“I don’t know,” you smiled, your body buzzing with all things him. “You didn’t answer my sex question.”
“No sex,” he promptly replied. Your heart fell, but obviously being oblivious to it, he kept on. “I’ve got a job to finish tonight that doesn’t include my dick.”
“What if I want it to include your dick? Aren’t you doing this to please me?”
How had the conversation just picked up like you’d never stopped being the two of you? The awkward air that had persisted, on and off since the wretched day in the kitchen in August — it was seeming to float away day by day with his knowledge of the baby in your belly.
But, before that line of thought could run off, he was responding to you.
“Are you saying you weren’t pleased with what I started in there just now?”
“Of course I fucking was, Jake,” you rolled your eyes. “But, still–.”
“You just answered the question yourself.”
You huffed with a roll of your eyes.
“Would you just finish drying your fucking hair so I can continue eating you out?”
The way your body temperature rose inexplicably at his words was not something you wanted to admit to, so you went with a simple response to keep you on level ground with him, rather than a quivering mess.
“Aye aye, captain.”
Another snort, followed by a chuckle. “Shut the fuck up.”
“We’re not naming our baby Black Beard,” you stated jokingly, standing up to full height, eyeing him. “I know you love pirates and I love watching the documentaries with you, but. . .,” you grinned at him.
“God, fuck no,” he wrinkled his brow, shaking his body in an air of distaste. “We don’t hate the baby. We love the baby.”
And, for the umpteenth time that evening, your heart rate spiked ridiculously high.
He loves the baby.
-🌼🌼🌼-
a/n: hmmm... Reader is convinced it’s a one time thing. buuuut does Jake? how do you think things will go in the bedroom once we've left the bathroom? ;)
Taglist:
@joshym, @gretavanfleetposts, @alyson814, @fretaganvleet, @lallisonl, @writingcold, @gvfpal, @twinszka, @jessicafg03, @reesetrippingthelight, @sacredjake, @laurenlovesgretavanfleet, @gretavangroove, @222headedcalf, @dreamssingold, @carbondancingthroughtime, @raviolilegs, @way-to-go-lad, @jakekiszkasmommy, @katgvf, @objectsinspvce, @jaketlover, @vanfleeter, @thetroublegetssoloud71, @seditabets, @jakekiszkapunchmeintheface, @jaketlove, @ohgodthefeeling-gvf, @starcatcher-jake, @anythingforjtk, @lucimoo, @indigostreakmorgan, @gretavanbear, @katelynn-gvf, @alwaysonthemend
@aintthatapity, @bowievanfleet, @fwzco, @takenbythemadness, @cherry-icecreamsmile, @laneygvf, @hi-hi-hello11, @sinarainbows, @jakesbarbarian, @mybussyinchrist, @becinabubblegvf, @heckingfrick, @danigvf, @pinkandsleepy1934, @derrangeddumpsterfire, @klarxtr, @josh-iamyour-mama, @abby-gvf, @cassyface, @gretavansabotage, @sacredtheslay, @alienobsever, @hollyco, @age0fwagner, @raceb14, @stardustcatcher, @styles-canvas, @ladywhimsymoon, @earthgrlsreasy, @peaceloveunitygvf
@torniturntomyarrow, @joshsbonnet, @llrosee, @starshine-gvf, @itsafullmoon, @gvfmarge, @creadliz98, @mackalah, @lek-gvf, @carlyfleet, @profitofthedune, @mefiorini, @welllauragvf, @highway-tuna, @dont-go-home-without-me, @sarah-gvf01, @polemicandcontent, @ageofbajabule, @texas-bbq-pringles, @builtbybrokenbells, @sacredtheslay
(please remind me that you wanna be tagged if i forgot to tag you!)
#hehehehe#jake is such a good helper huh#;)#doing exactly what maya told him to do#LMAO#covet#sneak peek
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✁FASHION FLIRT✃
Megumi Fushiguro x Reader
⭑story masterlist link
tw:none
Writing in between messages!!
🪡Chapter Thirty-three: Rehearsal
“These are actually really good,” Megumi said, digging his fork through another piece of the pancake. “Not too sweet?” you asked him.
“Not too sweet,” he confirmed.
“Are you excited for the show?” Megumi put a hand over his mouth, making sure not to completely swallow the food he had in his mouth before answering. “More nervous, but everything’s been going good at the past rehearsals, so hopefully this will go over well.”
“You’ll do great, you won’t mess up promise,” you smiled at him, returning your attention to your food.
“Hope so.”
“Looks good to you?” you asked Megumi as you helped adjust his hair a little more. “Yeah, looks better honestly.” You smiled at him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders giving him a kiss on the cheek.
“Y/n can you help me out, the hair in the back doesn’t wanna stay,” Ino spoke up a few feet besides you two. “Hm? oh yeah sure.”
You stood up straight, moving over to help style his hair back. “Thanks, sorry didn’t wanna bother but I couldn’t get it.”
“Yeah don’t worry, I’m not the best either at this but we have help around too just in case.”
Just as you were finished adjusting Ino’s hair, Megumi spoke up “Y/n I just noticed this parts uneven.” You looked over, stepping back towards Megumi. “Which part?” you asked placing your hand on his shoulder.
He stared at the mirror for a second, before meeting your eyes in it. “Oh never mind, I think I was just looking at it wrong.”
“Y/n!”
You turned around to the calling of your name, seeing Inumaki spin Yuki around towards you. “Look Y/n your friend did a great job! I love it!” Yuki announced. “Wow, you do look great Yuki!”
“And they said it wasn’t the same thing,” Inumaki nodded his head towards another station where Maki and Nobara where currently working.
You saw Maki and a volunteer assistant happily working on Kirara, with Choso looking up in your guys direction, eyes on Yuki, and Yuta happily chatting away with them. Next to them you could see Nobara argueing with Sukuna trying to get something on his face but his hand kept swatting it away. A nervous looking Kamo slowly inching away from them.
“Alright, we can chill for a few, we’ve got 10 minutes before needing to be in the backstage.”
“Good luck,” you told Megumi. “It’s still just practice, save it for the actual show.” You both leaned against a wall in the backstage area, seeing everyone file in to get lined up in order.
“You know the project?” Megumi brought up.
“Photography?”
“Yeah,” Megumi smiled at you, “I got an A, said it was nice to see me try something different.”
“Different? In what way?” you questioned
“He said it was nice seeing a more personal touch from me.” You looked at him, giving him quick peck on the cheek. “Good, you deserved it, it was beautiful, well at least to me.”
“Get lined up you can have your moment later,” Maki said approaching you two, “We gotta start heading out,” she told you. You raised your hand slightly, “See you in a few then.” Megumi returned the gesture, “See you.”
Author’s Note: more megumi fluff :3
ok one more chapter and a little epilogue left after this one
also guys i’m prob gonna post a poll for the next smau to do cause i can’t decide btwn two 😭😭 so that’ll be up tomorrow too
hope you guys enjoyed!!
Taglist below, feel free to comment or dm me to be added for the last chapter!!
TAGLIST
@iridescentrays @gumimegz @maya-maya-56 @mamafly @lunavixia @swissy23 @coltsgf @m00nglad3-mp3 @etsukis @xosren @qtnfer @oengleli @harek89 @y-sabell-a @morgyyyyyyy @getolvr @liliumaraneae @k3lbade @aiieera @dancedancey @get0sfav @chuyasthighs0 @hyssoplampflickers @kpopanimen @sad-darksoul @vivi-loves-penguins @kasumitenbaz @talkingsperm @nymphsdomain @inlovewithlondonn @rzcnlb @enchantingkitty @fuyuzemi @lysaray @ni-ki-ismyluv @reneny @frumira @mixzimi @miralunaela @dreamxiing @p3achiee @anianurst @fishii28 @arguendo @samutoru @hallothankmas @invisible-mori @aiserex @all-in-the-fandoms @milza12 @nyxlai @daintyminho @tokyodarlng @molovs @hopeladybug @dazaisms
#jjk#jjk college au#jjk megumi#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen megumi#megumi x reader#nobara kugisaki#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#jujutsu megumi#gojo satoru#jjk gojo#megumi x y/n#megumi x you#megumi fluff#fushiguro#jjk fushiguro#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jujustu kaisen#jjk x y/n#jjk au#jjk smau#smau#jjk no curse au#non curse au#sukuna ryomen#sukuna#yuta okkotsu#yuki tsukumo
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5 times Maya Bishop tries to confess she's in love with you, and the one time she actually does please?
mayaaaaa my love
the only one
1.
“Hey,” Maya smiles at you sweetly. “What are you doing right now?”
The two of you were the only ones in the station right now because everyone had been called onto a call, so you were doing your chores while Maya was on desk duty.
“Just finished cleaning the table,” You look towards the dining room table, as you slowly move towards the kitchen to clean the counters off. “I’m about to start on the kitchen. What do you need?”
“Do you want to play on the pole?” Maya lifts her brows excitedly. “Come on, It’ll be fun.”
“I’m—“
“Come on!” Maya leans towards you with pleading eyes.
You sigh, giving in to her eyes. “Fine. Only for a few minutes.”
You place the sponge on the kitchen island, and then your hand is in Maya’s. You’re being pulled down the hall until you’re on the overlook above the barn, standing on the platform above the pole.
“Ready?” Maya places her hands on the pole and looks back at you before jumping.
“You know if Andy sees us, she’s gonna kill us!” You yell down to the ground. “And you know I’m afraid of heights.”
“Then why are you a firefighter?” Maya places her hands on her hips, looking up at you from the ground.
“I don’t know,” You shrug.
“I’ll catch you if you fall, I promise,” Maya moves a little closer to the pole. “Come on, you’ve done this before.”
“Okay. Here I come.”
You slide down the pole, thankful you’re wearing pants, but you’d definitely have a burn on your thighs after that.
When you land, Maya has her hands on your hips to stabilize you.
“See? I got you,” Maya skims your face.
“Yes you do,” You laugh.
“Hey. Can I tell you something?”
“Sure!” You nod, opening your mouth to
speak again, you’re cut off by the sound of a horn.
The two of you look out the garage door and see the firetrucks pulling into the garage.
“We’ll talk later. Andy said that they were stopping at the kitchen after, so I better go finish cleaning the counters.”
“Okay. Yeah,” Maya nods disappointedly.
2.
You went out with the team after a particularly hard shift. Most of your calls were surrounded by children, and everyone knew it hurt you on a personal level.
The group and you had a specific table they always went to, because it would fit all of you, so that’s where they went tonight as well.
As you’re getting settled in, everyone decides what they want to drink (mostly beers) and so Maya offers to get the first round.
“Y/n, wanna help me carry them back?” She asks as she removes her coat.
“Sure,” You clear your throat, standing to walk over to her.
Maya places a hand on the small of your back, and you’d be lying if you said it didn’t make you feel so much more better. If you asked her why she did it, she would’ve said there were too many men in the bar.
“You okay?” Maya frowns as she leads the two of you to the bar.
You shrug while Maya orders the beers.
“I’m okay. You know how I am about the kids. And.. the Crisis One calls don’t help me any.”
“I know,” Mayas face held a soft expression, and you loved her for it.
“I hate it on there,” You lean against the bar. “Andy must hate me, because it feels like I’m on Crisis One everyday.”
“You know that’s not true,” She tilts her head sadly. “But we can talk to her about taking you off the Crisis One schedule for a few weeks.”
“Thank you,” You chuckle slightly, leaning your forehead on her shoulder. “I really mean it. You’re the sweetest.”
“Of course,” She smiles. “Hey, could we maybe talk about something?”
“Yeah,” You lift your head. “We can talk soon though, because our beers are here, and it might be better if we talk in a quieter setting.”
Maya nods, grabs a few beers, and walks back to the table with you.
3.
You pull your shirt over your head, in no big rush to get back to your apartment and your lone dog.
Most nights it was lonely, and no one offered to go out anywhere, so you were in no hurry to get home. You’d probably get dinner or something on the way home, then pass out on the couch.
“Where are you going after this?” Maya asked, her back turned to you as she removed her shirt.
“Home,” You laugh, removing your pants. “Back to the dog and my lonely apartment.”
“Wanna grab a bite to eat?” Maya turns her head, trying her best to keep her eyes on the side of your face and not your legs.
“Yes!” You turn excitedly, seeing Maya was already staring at you. “I’m sorry.. it’s just that I was really hoping someone would say that because I do not want to go home right now.”
“Perfect,” Maya lifts her chin. “There’s a small cafe I’ve been wanting to try. It’s halfway between our apartments, so it won’t cause us any grief.”
“Good,” You nod, now trying to finish changing faster than before. “I really just want a good cup of coffee and some greasy food.”
Maya zips her jeans, “Mm yes. A burger and fries sounds so good right now.”
You turn to face to Maya, now fully changed. “Tell me about it.”
Maya laughs humorously, “I love you.”
“I love you too,” You grab your bag, moving to exit the room. “I’ll wait for you out here.”
Maya presses her lips together, her mood suddenly changing.
“Not the way I love you,” Maya says under her breath, slamming her locker door closed.
4.
“I am so hungry,” You groan as you rush into the kitchen.
“Oh?” Victoria lifts her brows. “What are you hungry for? I can get Travis in here to make us something.”
“I kind of want..” Maya trails off, catching your gaze from across the room.
“Spaghetti,” You and Maya say at the same time.
“Oo yes,” Victoria claps her hands together. “I will tell him right away. Because if I try to make it, we might be putting a fire out here.”
You chuckle, “Oh yeah, same.”
“Be right back,” Victoria runs down the hall excitedly.
“You know how to clear a room,” Maya jokes from the table.
You roll your eyes, coming to sit across from Maya.
“I haven’t seen you all day,” You rest your arms on the wood table.
“Well, you are on Aid Car today,” Maya says.
“Yeah..” You nod. “But at least it’s with someone I like.”
“Yeah. What’s not to like about Jack?”
“A lot,” You joke. “No I’m just kidding. He’s been a perfect gentleman.”
“That’s good,” Maya lets out a breathy laugh. “Hey so.. there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you.”
“I’m all ears,” You lean forward.
“I have—“
“Here we come!” Victoria yells, dragging Travis behind her.
“Hold on,” Travis gasps, leaning over in hopes that he can get some air into his lungs. “Why am I here? Victoria was talking too fast.”
“You need to make us spaghetti,” Maya explains.
You look towards her and see her upset face, and make a note to ask her about it later.
5.
Somehow you got roped into helping with another training seminar. Every time either Andy or Victoria somehow got you signed up to help for the class.
This time it was a self defense class, which you had to admit wasn’t the worst of them, but you still didn’t like going to them, let alone teaching them.
You were praying you had someone who knew what they were doing to help teach with you, and apparently someone was on your side today, because Maya was preparing for the class when you got there.
“I must be late,” Your eyebrows drew together awkwardly.
“It’s okay. We were just starting,” Maya shrugs. “I’m Maya Bishop, and this is Y/n L/n. We’re going to teach you some basic self defense today.”
You nod along with everything Maya says, and suddenly you’re being flipped to the ground.
“Oo,” You groan in pain, ignoring the giggles from the teenagers.
“You should be paying attention,” Maya narrows her eyes down at you, offering a hand for you to take so you can lift yourself.
“I know. I didn’t get much sleep last night.”
“Let’s get them set up on an exercise and we can talk. Okay?”
“Sounds good,” You dust your butt off.
You and Maya instruct them on what to do, and she pulls you off to the side so the two of you can talk.
“What’s been bothering you?” She takes a sip of water from the bottle she has sitting off on the table.
“I don’t know,” You lie.
But you did know. You’ve had oncoming feelings for Maya, and they were there now, more than ever. You wanted to tell her, but you were terrified she wouldn’t reciprocate them.
“The dog’s kind of sick,” You look to the ground. “She’s been throwing up.”
That part wasn’t a lie.
“Maybe you should take her to the vet.”
“Yeah, I’m going to tomorrow. It’s my day off,” You bite the inside of your cheek, debating on whether to invite her or not since she was off as well.
“I’m off tomorrow too,” Maya puts her bottle down on the table. “I’ll come too. She’s a big dog. You’ll need help.”
“Thank you!” You smiled wide. “That would be very helpful.”
“Of course. I love you and Missy.”
You tilt your head, and look away, wishing she really meant it.
+1
Maya’s heart was beating out of her chest. It felt like she was going to have a heart attack, and she may as well be. The heartbreak would be all the same to her.
She has to stand back as Andy and Travis work to get you stabilized.
You were working to get some civilians out of their apartment as the ceiling fell down on you. The people managed to get out, but you hadn’t.
Maya ran in to save you, but after she did so, Andy made her stand back. She was a conflict of interest.
Victoria places a gentle hand on Maya’s shoulder as she paces, and Maya throws herself into Victoria’s hold.
No one has ever seen Maya in such a state. Everyone knew of her crush on you, and they were half excited that she was finally going to admit, but they were terrified that you wouldn’t pull through and that all of this happened.
Victoria holds Maya as you slowly wake.
“Ow,” You croak, and Maya is out of Victoria’s hold in a heartbeat. Everyone around you laugh at your reaction.
Maya dives to the ground, pulling you up into her arms, wrapping you in a bone crushing hug.
“Maya—“
“Don’t ever do that again,” Maya berates. “I was so scared.”
“I’m sorry—“
“No. I love you,” Maya lowers you so she could see your face. “And not like a friend, because that’s what you seem to think when I say those three words. I mean more than a friend, Y/n. Ever since your first day here. Even though I acted like I hated you. I really just wanted you to go out with me.”
“Maya.. I didn’t know.”
“I know,” Maya nods. “And I know that I just ruined one of my best friendships ever, but.. it’s worth it if you know. I’d rather you know, and hate me, than you not know.”
“Maya. Shut up,” You shake your head. “And here I thought I was the only one.”
“What—“
Maya is cut off as you press your lips to hers.
Everyone around you claps, and whoops, and you couldn’t care less about your pain, because you finally got what you wanted.
#station 19 x reader#station 19#station 19 imagine#maya bishop#maya bishop x reader#maya bishop x you#maya bishop x y/n#maya bishop imagine#wlw post#send asks
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hey lovey! could you possibly do 3 and 11A from the prompts for wandanat or marina? you choose!
I was thinking they work themselves too hard until they can’t deny they are unwell. Then they collapse and terrify their girlfriends, and fluffy sick comfort after ❤️
Perfect Partners
〖Notes: Hi sweet anon! I'm so sorry, this one slipped through the cracks I just found it in my drafts and finished it up. Please forgive my medical words, I am very much not a medical professional, my knowledge all comes from Grey's Anatomy and Google. I hope you enjoy! (for some reason my Station 19 fics always get long)〗
〖Summary: What you thought was a cold lands you in the hospital.〗
〖Word Count: 1.9k〗
〖Pairing: Marina x Sick Reader〗
〖Warnings: IV, hospital setting -not sure if this is a real warning but hospitals terrify me so I figured I'd add it in-〗
☾Masterlists☽
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
You slammed your fists against the punching bag, breathing heavily through your mouth as cold rivulets of sweat rolled down your back. Every few breaths were punctuated by a cough, but there wasn’t much you could do about that.
Maya had invited you to the gym, and while you both normally preferred to work out separately, it was her way of mending the argument you’d had the night before.
It was one you’d had frequently, where you would yell about her dangerous career while she bit back about your boring one. Carina hadn’t been home to mediate, leaving the two of you to fight it out on your own.
The blonde asked you to come to the gym as her way of extending the olive branch, apologizing for the way she had spoken to you. Your acceptance was your way of doing the same. You loved her so much, even with the fights. She understood that they came from a place of fear, and both of you felt guilty every time.
The firefighter had been glancing over at you for about twenty minutes now as you moved from machine to machine, listening to your wheezy breaths and heavy coughs. Of course, she knew that it was time to go home, but she was worried about how to bring it up.
Maya knew that you had a habit of getting defensive when it came to your health—probably a side effect of living with a doctor and a paramedic—and didn’t want a repeat of last night. However, as the morning went on, the woman was beginning to realize that it was time to get you home and into bed.
You threw another punch and gasped, a sudden sharp pain in your chest. You doubled over a bit and started to cough, unable to contain it. Luckily, the two of you were early enough that the gym was mostly empty, but the two or three other patrons cast you a disgusted look; one even stepped off his machine to move to the other side of the room. You couldn’t blame him.
“Woah, okay, your complexion is scaring me. Please sit down.” Maya’s hand fell on your back, and she eased you onto the floor, not shying away from your very sweaty self. Nevertheless, she rubbed between your shoulder blades until you were able to regain your breath.
“Okay, come on. Let’s go shower, then I’ll take you home,” the blonde said, her voice soft but firm. You groaned softly and shook your head, moving to check the tape across your knuckles. It had slipped a bit, but there wasn’t any damage to your hands. You hadn’t done a great job of wrapping them; you had been too shaky.
“No, you’re not done with your workout. I’ll just maybe sit, do one of the leg machines so that you can finish,” you replied, your lips fumbling over the words. You were still struggling to catch your breath, the combination of the workout and the chest cold not working in your favor.
“We’re done. Shower at home or here?” She decided, bracing your elbows to hold you up. The medic knew that she wouldn’t be able to discern your temperature until you cooled down from the workout, but based on how you had looked this morning, she was guessing that you at least had a little fever.
Maya was wracking her brain, coming up with every instance over the last few days that you had seemed even the least bit off. During your argument the night before, you had started to cry, but it was a hard topic she didn’t think too much of. Now that she was looking back, though, she was able to name probably ten instances where you had acted out of the ordinary.
She should have noticed it earlier and was already beating herself up over it.
You shrugged, not really wanting to shower anywhere. You were tired and felt gross, and now that it was all up in the air, you kind of wanted just to go home.
The blonde caressed your cheek and kissed your sweaty forehead, grimacing at the sweat covering your skin. It wasn’t the grossest thing she’d seen that week; her job generally consisted of dirt, smoke, blood, sweat, and other fluids, but it wasn’t lovely either.
“Okay, let's get you rinsed off really quick, and then we can go home.” You didn't have the strength to argue, so you just let her lead you into the showers, grateful that she was willing to help you undress and get under the cool stream. You weren’t thrilled by the temperature, but she had set it that way for a reason.
The shower was quick, just a short rinse before you were out again and wrapped in a towel. Thankfully, the clothes you’d shoved into the bag for the post-workout were much more comfortable. They consisted of Carina’s oversized Grey + Sloan Memorial Hospital sweatshirt and your favorite pair of sweatpants.
The shower had made you cold, so you were doubly grateful for the warm clothes, which you snuggled into without any hesitation.
Maya smiled fondly and kissed the tip of your nose, making you sneeze. You pouted a bit and lifted your head from your sleeves, mildly annoyed by the damp spot left from where you’d wiped your nose.
“Ew,” The blonde chuckled, wrapping an arm around your waist. You leaned against her, not caring about the looks you got from a few store employees. It didn’t really matter anymore; you were going home.
When you arrived at the house that the three of you shared, you found it empty, a note left by Carina sitting on your counter. Maya deposited you on the couch before grabbing the note, sighing at the words scrawled in the brunette’s typically perfect handwriting. She didn't fit the stereotype of doctors' poor handwriting.
“Car was called in for some emergency surgery; looks like it’s just the two of us,” she said softly, walking around the counter to sit beside you. You scooted over to her and put your head on her chest, nuzzling into her sweater. It probably smelled like her, but your nose was too stuffy to smell anything.
You were only able to sit like that for a few minutes before you started to cough again, your breaths coming in harsh wheezes. Your chest was tight, and your lungs full of mucus.
Now that you were closer, Maya was getting even more concerned. Not only had your fever developed far too quickly for her liking, but she was also worried about your shallow, squeaky breaths.
“I’m going to get my bag. Stay put,” she ordered, not realizing that you wouldn’t be moving even if she asked, not without assistance at least.
The blonde raced through the house to find her medical bag, snagging it from the bedroom where she and Carina always kept them. When she returned, you were half asleep, drooling onto a pillow. Even with your pale gaunt face and red nose, she thought you were adorable.
Maya sat down beside you and pulled out her thermometer, which was quickly dragged across your forehead to reveal a temperature of 102.5. It wasn't drastically alarming, but it wasn't something that stemmed from a simple cold.
“Okay babe, sit up for me.” She coaxed, pulling you into a sitting position. You whined your displeasure, worrying the young woman. An hour ago, you had been working out, albeit not with any particular rigor or accuracy, and now you could barely hold your head up. This was an unexpectedly rapid decline, which was beginning to make her wonder if a hospital visit was in order.
The paramedic rested the stethoscope on your chest, listening to your crackling breaths with intense focus. She repeated the process on your back, shaking her head in mild frustration. When she leaned back, she hung the stethoscope around her neck, leaning forward to look into your eyes.
“I…I really don’t feel well.” You admitted, your voice barely audible.
“Looks like we’re going to visit Carina.” She said gently, earning a whimper from you. You had absolutely no interest in moving from your spot on the couch, but Maya had made it clear that you didn’t get a say in the matter.
“I know, but we don’t really have another option right now.”
It didn’t take long for you to find yourself lying on a cot in a hospital room, a bracelet around your wrist, an oxygen mask covering your face, and an IV in your arm. Most of it was a blur, but you certainly remembered a concerned Dr. April Kepner who had decided to take your case even after you were transferred to the hospital proper.
Now, you were curled up in a bed beside Maya, listening to whatever music she had decided to play on her phone. Carina had been updated on your condition and was supposed to be getting out of surgery in about an hour, but for now, you and Maya were making it work.
・.・✭・.・✭・.・✭・.・✭・.・
Carina rushed into your hospital room, devoid of her white coat. Her eyes were full of panic, which only diminished when she saw you smile.
“Cara mia.” She breathed, walking to sit beside you on the bed. There wasn't a whole lot of room with Maya lying beside you, but she managed. She carded her fingers through your hair and glanced at your monitor, watching the steady beep of your heartbeat.
“How bad are they?” the pediatric surgeon asked, keeping her voice quiet so as not to disturb you. You were sort of asleep, only slightly aware of what was going on around you. All you really knew was that the people you loved were beside you, bringing you immense comfort.
“When we got here, their O2 stats were in the 80s, temp 102.9. Kepner was in the pit; she did a chest x-ray. Looks like pneumonia. She has them on antibiotics and saline for hydration. The plan is to keep them overnight just to be safe and reevaluate in the morning,” Maya replied, mixing medical jargon with comforting her concerned girlfriend.
Carina let out a relieved sigh and smiled, leaning down to kiss your feverish forehead. You grabbed a fistful of her baby pink scrubs, not fully noticing what she was wearing. Even if you had, you didn’t care.
“Someone pushed themselves too hard, huh?” She murmured, settling down into the bed with you squished between herself and Maya. She didn’t even consider changing into real clothes; being with you mattered more.
“I’m sorry I made you feel like you had to come to the gym with me.” The blonde said into your hair, laying her head on Carina’s fingers. The surgeon continued to drag her nails against your scalp, and Maya wrapped your fingers in hers.
“S’okay.” You whispered, settling further into the bed. It wasn’t the most comfortable thing, but it was much better with your girlfriends there. You didn’t even care about the argument between you and Maya the night before; it was one you’d had before, and you’d probably have it again.
Regardless, you loved the woman, and you always would. Every so often, you were reminded of just how lucky you were to be with the two of them. A doctor and a firefighter, the perfect partners.
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Secret Secret Chapter 4
OT8 Straykids x reader, ABO AU
Masterlist | Part 3 | Part 5
The rest of the week passed by surprisingly easily. You got around to meeting everybody else on the team, and you did your best to remember their names (thankfully most of them were older than you, which allowed you to easily pull the Oppa or Unnie card when you forgot). They were all kind and helpful, and at the worst indifferent to your presence, which allowed you to make it through the week fairly easily.
You were busy with promotional translations and working out the translation for a few videos that would be dropping the next week, so you saw little of the others as you spent most of your time on your computer. Even so, you managed to find some free time to meet up on Friday with Maya, who was swamped with picking out and modifying all the MV outfits that were scheduled for the end of the month.
When she plopped onto her chair with a sigh, you could only give her a sympathetic look. “Hey, you sure you have the time to have coffee with me?”
“I need a break. Believe me, this caffeine hit is the only thing keeping me going right now.”
“Looking forwards to the weekend?” You asked, knowing that she got Saturday and Sunday off.
“Hmm, I’m definitely going to enjoy my weekend,” Maya confirmed, sipping her coffee. “My girlfriend’s birthday is on Sunday, so we’re planning a small party to celebrate. What about you?”
“I think I’m just going to relax at home.”
You still had to come in on Saturday for a quick meeting to confirm the projects you had worked on that week before they were posted, but it would only be for an hour or two, which left the rest of the weekend free. Normally you and Sooyoung would go out, but you weren’t really feeling it, especially after what happened last week.
Maya lifted her head and gave you a soft smile. “Do you want to come to the party?”
“What time is it?”
“We’re planning for noon. A nice little lunch and then just a hang out afterwards. It’s just going to be me and my girlfriend, a few friends, and some coworkers,” Maya said.
You nodded in understanding. “I’ll probably stop by for a bit. Just send me the address.”
Both of you realized the issues immediately after you spoke, and she was pulling out her phone before you could even say you didn’t have her number out loud. The two of you exchanged numbers and had a comfortable conversation for a few minutes to finish your drinks. Your lunch officially ended when Maya received a text. She scowled.
You shared a knowing look. “Duty calls.”
-0-0-
The company building was practically empty this early on a Saturday morning. On the one hand you were mad at having to be awake so early on the weekend, but on the other hand you appreciated them getting this out of the way so you would have the rest of the afternoon free. The guard nodded in greeting to you as you passed to the elevators, and you smiled in return.
The meeting passed by pretty quickly, all things considered. Soojin, Jeonhui, and the head advertisement manager all joined you, along with a couple of other employees, and you went over the promotional material. You felt a little nervous when presenting your work, but nothing seemed out of place, and they quickly moved on to the next person with little to no words.
Maybe somebody else would have been offended by the way they seemed to look past you, but you took comfort in the indifference, knowing that it was the lack of attention that allowed you to be where you were now.
The meeting was over just as the clock struck 11, and Jeonhui wished you a good weekend as you were leaving. A few of the other employees lingered behind to talk with each other, but you weren’t close or comfortable enough to any of them to join them. You just wanted to go home.
The elevator reeked when you opened it.
The smell of spoiled milk and rotten strawberries hit you, and you immediately clamped a hand over your nose. Disappointment, anger, fear. Your omega was immediately on guard, and you felt like your heart had dropped down to your stomach.
“Ugh, what is that scent?”
“Is that … an omega?”
The other employees who had been behind you walked over, and even when the elevator doors closed once again, the air still lingered with the smell of an omega in distress. It made your hackles rise, and you felt the need to find that omega and comfort them, while another part of you wanted to run. An omega in distress usually meant danger.
You swallowed hard.
The female employee wrinkled her nose in disgust. “Gross. What’s an omega even doing in the building to begin with?”
“Probably one of the trainees. They like to come around and practice on weekdays, as if the extra effort changes the fact that they’re an omega’s.” The male employee said, waving his hand in front of his nose. “Disgusting.”
“That’s omegas for you. Think they deserve the world just because they’re so dainty and fragile. Ugh, I can’t stand them. Why does the company even allow omegas to audition anymore?”
“I don’t think they do. Must have just presented.”
“Let’s just take the stairs. I’ll get a cleaner to sterilize the elevator.”
The two employees walked away, either ignorant of or completely unaware of your rapidly changing mood. Their words echoed in your head, and you found your eyes welling up with tears, not self-consciously, but in anger. Anger at the way they talked so callously about another person, most likely a child.
They way they so nonchalantly and openly admitted the prejudice against omegas in the work force. And the way that neither one of them even thought for a second to go looking for that poor omega in need of help.
You weren’t like them.
You took the elevator, stopping on every floor you had access to and sniffing the air from the hallways. One of the upper floors, where the practice rooms could be found, had a lingering scent, but it was faint, which told you the omega had probably come from there.
You then checked the office floors below them, but they were surprisingly empty. Finally, you found yourself on a floor that you had yet to see, but the second the doors opened you knew it was the right one.
It was the studio floor, which held recording studios as well as production studios.
And it reeked.
The scent in the elevator had already begun to dissipate, so the strong smell was a good sign that the omega was still in the area. Why a trainee would be on the studio floor was beyond your knowledge, but you were on a mission. Your own omega snapped her jaws at the thought of the harsh cruel words from your fellow colleagues.
Gross.
Disgusting.
I can’t stand them.
You knew even if you had been a beta those words would have been offensive to you, and the fact that they said it so easily made your skin boil. You were grateful for your own scent blockers because there was no way they wouldn’t have noticed your soured mood otherwise.
You followed the smell past the entrance area, which had a small kitchen area where coffee and snacks were available, for those who didn’t want to go all the way down to the cafeteria. Or, part of you considered, for those who stayed late enough that the cafeteria would be closed. You thought of Chan, the way the other staff members warned you to keep an eye on him.
‘He’s a workaholic,’ One translator had mentioned in passing. ‘It’s admirable, if not a little stupid.’
Thinking of the alpha made your chest ache.
It felt almost fitting that the farther down the hall you went, in the opposite direction from the recording studios and instead towards a series of locked and labeled doors, when you realized where exactly the scent was leading you. Nearly at the end of the hall, you found a door labeled ‘3racha’.
The door was closed, but the scent told you there was someone inside.
You felt most of your anger dissipating.
On the one hand, you found yourself almost relieved. If there was anybody that you had gotten to know in this past week that you would trust with a distressed omega, it was Chan. He had 2 omegas on his team. He was a comforting figure. And above all else, he was a good man. You trusted him to have the situation handled, and to provide the compassion necessary for the situation.
But on the other hand, your omega refused to leave without making sure that the other was okay. It was survival mentality, the need to stick together, especially in a world like this that would so easily shove the weak and underappreciated away.
But checking in on the other omega would mean having to confront Chan, and you weren’t ready to have to deal with him just yet. You couldn’t look him in the eye without your omega’s want bubbling up, and this close to the surface, you wouldn’t be able to suppress it.
You didn’t really get to make your decision before the door opened, and you startled, legs tensing as you considered running.
A young girl who couldn’t be older than 15 nearly smacked right into you, and she quickly raised her wide-eyed gaze to meet with your own, mouth opening in shock and her scent hitting you with a burst of surprise. Strawberries and milk, sweet and pleasant despite the worry that it conveyed.
“Oh, I- Sorry!” She bowed so low that her hair flipped over her head, the strands hitting you in the face. And then she realized what had happened, lifting her head up with a gasp. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to- are you okay?”
You raised your hands to show her you meant no harm.
“Hey, it’s okay, no need to apologize.” You eyed her tear-stained cheeks. “Are you okay?”
She dropped her gaze. “I’m fine. Thank you.”
You wanted to pull her into a hug. You had to remind yourself she didn’t know you, and that would be weird.
‘It wouldn’t be weird if she knew you were an omega’ your own omega grumbled in your head.
You ignored her.
“You should go home, Jisoo. Your parents will get worried,” A voice said from behind the girl, and your eyes snapped up. “Don’t worry about today. Everything will be okay.”
“Thank you, Oppa.” Jisoo gave you a weary look, but bowed to you nonetheless. “Have a nice day, Unnie.”
“Get home safe,” You answered back, and her shoulders relaxed slightly.
You both watched Jisoo make her way down the hall, the newly presented omega now calmer and safe. Your omega settled at the confirmation, and you felt your energy level drop, prompting you to press your hand against your forehead and close your eyes to let out a huge sigh.
“You know, I think you’re the last person I expected to find on this floor,” Changbin mused.
When you opened your eyes, you saw the beta watching you with a curious look, and you winced. Now that you had calmed down and everything was okay, you realized your behavior might have seemed erratic and confusing to anyone who wasn’t aware of your true presentation. Which Changbin was not.
You suddenly wished that it had been Chan inside the studio instead.
“There was a distressed scent in the elevators, and I … was worried,” You explained, trying to make yourself sound nonchalant. “I just wanted to make sure everything was okay.”
He pushed his tongue to the inside of his cheek, eyes drifting from your figure to the wall behind you. “Well, it’s a pretty shitty situation, I can’t lie.”
“I heard the company isn’t allowing omega trainee’s anymore.”
“Yeah, they made the decision last year.” Changbin shook his head. “She’s devastated. I calmed her down, told her I would try to figure something out, but ….”
He trailed off, a frown pulling at his mouth. You couldn’t smell him, his sweater doing a good job of hiding most of his scent from you, but you could tell just by his body language that he was angry. You felt a sense of reassurance at that.
Maybe Chan wasn’t the only best option for this situation.
“Are you two close?” You wondered, thinking about the direct path Jisoo had made from the practice rooms. “She headed straight here once she realized what was going on.”
“Were not particularly close, but Chan has told the trainees multiple times that if they ever need anything, they can come to us for help. I just happened to be the one here today.”
You nodded. “They look up to you guys, don’t they?”
“I think all trainee’s look up to idols,” Changbin said, running his hand through his hair. “I kind of wish Chan had been here instead. Or maybe even Jisung. I’m not sure how much I helped her.”
“I think you did a good job. She didn’t smell distressed anymore,” You reassured him.
Changbin’s eyebrows twitched down for a second, even as he nodded. “Yeah, I guess.”
You both stood there in silence for a few seconds. Eventually, you sighed again.
“Well, I guess I should get going. Umm, I guess have a good weekend,” You said.
“You too.”
When you got to the end of the hall, right before turning the corner, you glanced back. Changbin was still standing at the doorway, watching you with a thoughtful look on his face.
-0-0-
Maya’s girlfriend, Isa, was an amazing cook, and judging by the gleeful look on her face as everyone practically devoured the food, you had a feeling she knew. You practically moaned the moment you took your first bite. A beta you assumed was one of her friends melted in his seat, and then jokingly asked Isa for her hand in marriage.
“You’ll have to fight me for it,” Maya joked.
“Don’t tempt me.”
You giggled, and Isa leaned over her side of the table to smile at you. “How’s the food?”
“I’m normally not the type of person to encourage the birthday girl cooking her own meals, but hot damn. I can see why they put you in charge of the cooking,” You praised.
Isa beamed. “Exactly! That, and Maya burns water.”
“It was one time!”
The rest of the table laughed loudly, and Maya rolled her eyes. The other guests began to converse between themselves, and Isa eyed you with a small smile.
“So, you’re the new translator,” She began, and you paused with your fork an inch from your mouth. You nodded. “How’s it going? Maya tells me you joined at an inconvenient time, what with the tour starting up soon.”
You raised your eyebrows. “Oh? She told you about that?”
“I’m her girlfriend, she tells me everything,” Isa said nonchalantly.
“Everything?”
Isa grinned, leaning closer. “Everything. Maya’s nice and quiet and gets her job done, so sometimes people are very loose lipped when around her. You’d be surprised by the amount of drama that goes on in that fancy building of yours that nobody every hears about.”
“Oh? Like what”
She simply winked. “I’ll tell you later.”
Later turned out to be while you were washing dishes, a task you decided to take up to get away from the room full of alpha pheromones. You knew they weren’t doing it on purpose, since they were under the impression you were a beta and had no way of knowing about your sensitive omega nose, but it was still enough for you to get overwhelmed.
Isa eyed the kitchen door where Maya was with the other guests, and then she was leaning in close to you as she passed by. “Two of the stylists are hooking up.”
“What?!” You nearly dropped the plate you were holding.
“JYP tried to get one of his nephews into the company, but he bombed his audition so badly that he couldn’t even use nepotism to save it.”
You let out a sharp noise of surprise. “Oh my god, Maya really does tell you everything.”
“Yup.” Isa smirked. “Want to hear more?”
“I’m not sure I should,” you protested, but after a moment of her just staring at you knowingly, you broke out into a smile. “Oh, who am I kidding. Tell me everything!”
“Well, I’m not quite sure about this one, because it’s more recent, but apparently one of the idols is having a lovers spat with another one of his members.”
You blinked in surprise. “That’s definitely news to me.”
“Yeah. She was complaining about how the recent photoshoot had to be delayed an extra hour because Felix refused to be in the same room as Chan.”
“Wait, Felix and Chan are the ones fighting?”
Isa paused. “Oh, yeah. I forgot you were working with them. Don’t let Maya know I told you anything, it’s supposed to be kept hush hush.”
“Right. I won’t say anything,” You promised.
-0-0-
“Why are you and Felix fighting?”
The words were out of your mouth before you could stop them. In your defense, you would have said anything in that moment, if just to end the awkward silence that had fallen over you and Chan when the two of you found yourselves alone in the meeting room.
You hadn’t intended to be alone with him. You weren’t even supposed to be in the meeting room in the first place. You had been passing by after dropping off some papers that Jeonhui had asked for, and just happened to almost get hit by a door as it opened, with Felix storming out. You both paused and stared at each other for a second in surprise.
“Oh, hey.”
Your eyes darted towards the open door, where you could see a dejected Chan standing with his hands on his hips. “Hey.”
Felix gave you a strained smile as he passed you by, and you watched him go for a second before you entered the meeting room yourself. Chan only lifted his head a fraction as you walked in. You closed the door behind you, and the two of you lingered in that awkward silence before you finally decided to break it in the most stupid way possible. You knew the question was out of line the second it was out of your mouth.
Why had you even walked into the room to begin with? Why hadn’t you just walked away?
Chan finally lifted his head completely, and you froze at the sight of his eyes.
They were red.
“Shit.“
Your hand reached blindly behind you for the door handle, but before you could grab it Chan was suddenly at your side, hand gripping your wrist tightly. Your breath caught in your throat, the sudden bitter scent of his alpha hitting you in the face.
He swallowed hard. “Don’t go.”
“I don’t think I should even be here,” You admitted, but you allowed him to pull your arm back in front of you anyways. “Chan, your alpha-“
“I know,” He whispered, closing his eyes. “It’s okay, I’m not … I can’t stand watching another omega walk away from me right now. Just … stay.”
With his alpha so close to the surface, you found it hard to refuse. While you could have just stood there, allowing him a moment to come down from his headspace on his own, there was something so painful about watching Chan battle with his own emotions and instincts. It was an impulsive decision, much like the choice to walk into the meeting room, much like the need to say something.
You grabbed his hand, the same one still holding you, and brought it up to your lips. With a soft kiss to the inside of his wrist, Chan let out a shudder, and he easily allowed you to pull him closer until his face was pressed against your neck.
While your omega scent was still covered with the artificial scent of beta, it would have to do. You softly allowed him to scent you, and it only took a few minutes before Chan came back to himself with a sharp inhale.
He pulled away from you so quickly he stumbled on his feet. “Shit, I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be,” You reassured him, licking your lips. “You needed some grounding.”
“Fuck.” He ran his hand down his face.
You gave him a sympathetic smile. “That bad, huh?”
“Felix is really mad this time. I think I fucked up,” He said.
“Mind me asking what happened?” Chan was silent, and you took a hint. “Right, none of my business then.”
“No, it’s definitely your business.”
You paused from where you had started to turn back to the door. “Sorry?”
“Felix is mad because of the omega I slept with last week. You.”
“What?”
“He wants to meet you.”
“What?”
Chan let out a sigh, and he pulled out a chair to sit down. After a moment of consideration, he offered one of the chairs for you, and you were quick to take it since it felt like your legs were seconds away from giving out on you. The more he talked, the more dizzy you felt.
“Explain,” You said, staring Chan down.
“Felix knows I slept with an omega last week. I let it slip that I was still in contact with you, accidentally, and now he thinks that I might be having a serious relationship with you- well, the omega. He wants to meet you, and when I told him he couldn’t, he got upset. He thinks that … he thinks I might be trying to replace him.”
“That’s ridiculous,” You said with a scowl.
“I know. I thought it was just a petty little argument, but he … I think he actually believes it. He got so upset, yelled that me not wanting him to meet the other omega was suspicious and that if it wasn’t serious I would have just said that, and I obviously can’t explain it-“
“Because of me.”
“Because it’s complicated,” Chan corrected, rubbing his face again. “This isn’t on you, sweetheart. This is my problem.”
You scoffed. “Are you kidding me? Your omega is mad at you because of me, Chan. He thinks you’re replacing him with me. And if you told him the truth, none of this would be an issue.”
“If he thought it was just a one-night stand, then this wouldn’t be a problem anyways. I’m the one who fucked up here,” Chan argued.
“Why would he even think it was more than that anyways?” You wondered.
Chan froze.
You found yourself letting out a small laugh as he just stared at you with wide eyes, not wanting to believe the first thought that ran through your head. But the second thought, and then the third, all felt less convincing. Your smile dropped pretty quickly.
“Chan. Why would Felix think it was more than a one-night stand?”
He ran his fingers through his hair, then down his face, and then he shot to his feet to turn away from you completely. You shook your head in disbelief.
“You can’t be serious,” You breathed.
“This was before I knew you were a part of the company. I told him the morning after, before the meeting, and I obviously didn’t have the chance to explain what happened.”
“Jesus, Chan! You were planning on courting me?”
“Yes, I was.”
“Fuck.” You slumped back in your seat. “Why didn’t you just tell him I rejected you or something?”
“He would know I was lying. I wouldn’t have had time to ‘meet up’ with you this past week because we’ve been busy, and if he thought I did after he asked to meet you, he would have been even more pissed at me for ignoring him.” Chan explained. “It’s just … I thought I’d have time to come up with something, but it’s been a very stressful week.”
“Fuck,” you repeated.
Chan turned back around, giving you a tired look. “Yeah, fuck.”
He shook his head, and with his hands on his hips, he began to pace the length of the meeting room. You glanced a look at the clock and realized that you needed to get back to your desk before someone noticed how long you had been gone. You needed to finish your work for the day. You needed to leave the room and hope that nobody caught you here with Chan. What you needed to do was clear.
But you couldn’t think about any of that. You could only think about the strained smile on Felix’s face as he passed you by, the havoc that Chan had to have gone through for his alpha to take over, the fact that their relationship was being strained because of you. You closed your eyes, but you could still hear the footsteps as Chan paced.
“Tell him.”
The footsteps paused, and you opened your eyes to give Chan an even look.
He didn’t turn around. “What was that?”
“Felix,” You clarified, letting out a soft sigh. “Tell him the truth.”
Chan spun around with wide eyes. “Are you serious?”
“I’m not letting your pack relationships fall apart because of my choices.”
“You don’t have to do this.”
You tilted your head to the side. “Do you trust Felix?”
“With my life,” he said with no hesitation.
“Then so do I.”
The two of you stared each other down. Your head still felt fuzzy, but your chest no longer felt like there was a weight holding you down. You pulled yourself up from the seat, and only took a second to gain your composure.
You gave him a nod. “Well, I got to get back to work. I’ll see you later.”
“Wait, that’s it?”
You didn’t bother answering him, instead making your way towards the elevators with an urgency that only grew the further you got from him. The dizziness had gone away, and as the reality of the situation started to dawn on you, so did your clarity. Being that close to Chan, letting him scent you with his alpha so close to the surface, had been a terrible decision. Your body felt hot, and you were grateful for your scent blockers.
Today was chalking up to be a horrible day.
You were going into pre-heat.
#stray kids x reader#skz x reader#stray kids x you#skz x you#chan x reader#chan x you#bangchan x reader#bangchan x you#changbin x reader#changbin x you#lee minho x reader#lee minho x you#minho x reader#minho x you#hyunjin x reader#hyunjin x you#han x you#han x reader#jisung x reader#jisung x you#felix x you#felix x reader#seungmin x you#seungmin x reader#in x you#in x reader#jeongin x reader#jeongin x you#stray kids fanfic#abo au
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maya i am so so sad today, can you pretty please give me something small that will break me then put me together? i love you <3
hi love, I hope you’re okay. Sorry it took me a day for me to get this out. It’s not almost midnight my time so i apologize for any errors I’ll get to them sometime later. I’m tired lol. But i hope everything is okay, my dear. if you need anything lmk babes 🖤
Hold On | Eddie Munson
Eddie learns some devastating news about one of the most important people in his life
TW: Angst. Medical diagnosis, mentions of blood, talks of death, sad Eddie :(
The way he came home quiet with a blank look on his face told you something went wrong today. The big kiss and dramatic welcoming home he normally gave was replaced with a small “hey” followed by him going to the refrigerator for a beer. He didn’t get a chance to grab a bottle before you were right behind him, concern and worry evident in your voice as you asked him what was wrong.
His simple reply of “nothing” quickly turned into a screaming match that resulted in the silence that now consumed the both of you.
Eddie was never one to snap at you for small things. But, everything about him was passionate, arguing with you didn’t fall short. He was already upset and needed time to process what he just learned. Yet, he didn’t know how to properly communicate that to you. So the moment he snapped at you, you snapped right back at him with full defense. After a few remarks were yelled, you walked away with the slam on the bedroom door with tears in your eyes.
He knew he should have gone after you. It wasn’t your fault. But he needed to figure out his emotions before bringing anymore onto you. So, Eddie simply grabbed the beer from the refrigerator, finished it off with a few swings, gave you an hour to yourself then followed to the bedroom.
You were already on your side of the bed. Pajamas on completed with wet cheeks. He looked at you as soon as you glanced up at him opening the door. Neither one of you acknowledging each other verbally. He walked back out to shower, only throwing on a pair of sweatpants before coming back to climb into bed next to you.
You turned to face him, ready to talk about what happened. To see what happened and fix the problem.
He turned to face the wall.
You now stare at his bare back. The tattoos running from his chest to the muscles of his shoulders mock you as you itch to trace them with your fingers. A habit you’ve grown to do after learning his body.
His hands rest under the pillow holding his head. His breathing is heard alerting you that’s he’s not asleep either. The fight is playing on repeat in both of your heads but neither of you know what to say.
He knows he shouldn’t have started a fight. You were only concerned for him. The sniffles he hears from you guilts him, but he doesn’t know how to tell you what caused him to come home so distraught. He didn’t mean to get upset with you when you only came to comfort him.
The conversation he had with Wayne holds heavy in his heart.
The guilt of fighting instead of talking with you about it makes it harder to process.
But he knows he has to make it right with you. The cruel reminder that tomorrow is never promised tells him that every moment counts. He takes a deep breath in through his nose before letting it out.
He breaks the silence with your name.
Your name falls softly from his lips. It’s so quiet that you ask yourself if you really heard him, but when he whispers your it again your suspicious are confirmed.
“Yeah?” You whisper back. He doesn’t move, still laying on his side facing away from you.
Eddie swallows, glad you’re still awake. Grateful you’re acknowledging him after his behavior. He knows what he has to say. He knows he has to tell you why he was so upset.
He sinks his teeth into his bottom lip. “I’m sorry.”
You don’t say anything Not because you have nothing to say, but because you know he’s holding back. The way his confident attitude has been replaced by unsureness tells you that you need to let him work through his head. A few moments pass before he clears his throat.
You stay still as he slowly turns over and rolls onto his back. His clasp together and rest on his tummy. You watch as Eddie closes his eyes. He takes in a deep breath and holds it for a moment before he lets it out. He keeps his eyes on the ceiling. You keep your eyes on him.
“Wayne had me come over after work. Said he finally got sent home after his boss got him coughing up some blood. Said the doctor ran some tests,” Eddie stops himself. You feel like your blood has ran cold and tears spring to your eyes again, this time for the older Munson you’ve grown to love like family.
Guilt plunges through you thinking about how Eddie must have felt hearing that only to come home to an argument. The fear of the unknown he feels with his uncle’s health is quickly sympathized and all traces of anger is melted. The moonlight shining in through the window reflect over his glazed over eyes.
Eddie braces himself for what he’s about to say. If he says it out loud it makes it real. And if it’s real, it’s a reality Eddie isn’t ready to face.
You reach your hand over and hold onto his clasped ones. He doesn’t have to finish his sentence for you to fill in the blanks. The signs have been there. The tears form in the back of your eyes as you know he has the confirmation that’s been on his mind. Since you first found Wayne passed out in his trailer a month ago and Eddie found the blood covered tissues in the bathroom.
Eddie goes to tell you what the diagnosis came back as but instead his biggest fear is spoken out loud.
“I’m going to lose him,” Eddie’s voice breaks.
You instantly sit up, bringing him into you. Arms pull him up and he crashes his head into your neck. He doesn’t fight you or pull away. He breaks down. You wrap your arms around his back and he clings onto you as his tears begin to stain your shirt. You don’t care at all as you hold him. Sobs fall from him and you do your best to keep your own tears at bay.
You needed to be strong for him. He was always strong for you and now it was your turn to be his strength.
A hand runs through his hair as you try your best to soothe him. “He’s going to be okay, Eddie. It’s Wayne. The man has defied life itself. Nothing can stop him,” you don’t know if your words are enough to console him but you believe them as you speak them.
Wayne Munson was one of the strongest men you knew. He would pull through from this. He just had too.
You only hold onto him tighter. Reassuring him that his uncle will be okay even if it would be for a little bit. Eddie pulls back to wipe his eyes but the tears quickly fall back. “I can’t lose him. I’ve lost my parents. I can’t lose him too.” His breathing is starting to become erratic and you know you need to pull him back from the ledge before he goes into a panic attack.
Before he can even talk himself from pulling away from you, you hold his face in between your hands. His cheeks are cold and stain your hands with his tears but you don’t care. The devastation on his face is enough to wish you had the cure for every disease. Anything to take away his pain.
But you don’t have the cure.
You can’t take away the pain he feels about the news of the only parental figure in his life.
So instead you swipe your thumbs under his eyes and kiss him for a moment to break the unregulated breathing pattern. He stares at you with wide eyes.
“I need you to breath in with me, okay?” You take a deep breath in and wait for him to follow you. He lets out a shaky breath and sucks it back in. “Good, now breath out,” you exhale and watch as he does the same.
You have him breath with you a few more times until his breathing is no longer a sign of distress. His eyes never leave yours, complete trust behind them as you nod at him to silently say I’m right here for you. You reposition yourself and throw your legs over his thighs before wrapping your arms around his neck, Eddie instantly wrapping his around your back. He tucks his face back into your neck and tells you that he’s okay now.
Thirty seconds pass before he’s crying again. You only hold him once more.
Neither one of you pull away from each other. Eddie and you stay wrapped up in other until his sobs turn into sniffles and the sniffles turn back into silence. His face stay in between your neck and shoulder where you keep him there. Safe from the world until you no longer can do so.
It’s not until you hear soft snores coming from him when you realize he’s asleep. Carefully, you turn and kiss the side of his temple before attempting to ease him down to the mattress. It’s unsuccessful as he jolts awake, you quickly telling him you only want to lay down. He only nods as you climb off of him and allow him to reposition one last time. Eddie’s eyes are red and his cheeks are blotchy but you only smile at him as he gets on his back. He gently pulls you down next to him.
You lay your head on his chest listening to his heartbeat as his hand traces circles on your back. “I don’t know what I’m going to do without him,” Eddie’s voice is raspy. You continue to listen to the rhythm of his heart.
“He’s strong, Eddie,” you take a deep breath. “But you have to be stronger for him. He’s always been there for you. Now it’s your turn.”
Eddie thinks about your words. He knows you’re right. But, he struggles to accept it. Memories of Wayne always putting him first play in his mind as he continues to mindlessly trace letters and shapes onto your back. The times Wayne would stay up all night worried about a sick Eddie and go to work in the morning. The way he’d offer Eddie homework help even when he was tired from a long shift makes the young Munson smile. Wayne was always so selfless, taking care of a child that wasn’t even his.
You fall asleep listening to Eddie’s heartbeat while he stays up thinking about how he can return the favor to Wayne. If there’s one thing his uncle taught him, it was being there for the ones you loved. Eddie Looks down at your sleeping frame as your words echo in his mind. He nods before kissing the back of your head happy to have you in his life. “Yeah, Wayne is strong. But it’s my turn to be stronger for him.”
——
In the morning Eddie is the first to wake up. He carefully gets out of bed, slipping his pillow in between your arms to keep you asleep. His mind is still reeling from the news of yesterday but it only fuels him to shower and get ready. He scribbles a messy note and leaves it on the counter letting you know where he’s off to and locks up the front door before taking off.
It’s a quarter after eight in the morning when he arrives to the trailer park. Wayne’s already up sipping on a fresh cup of black coffee when Eddie knocks on his front door. Wayne opens the door and takes note of the sunglasses hiding Eddie’s puffy eyes.
Eddie gives him a big grin as he stuffs his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket. “What? You thought you were doing this alone?”
Wayne instantly feels a weight on his chest and his eyes furrow together. The thought of having to go through his treatment by himself was something he braced himself for. He didn’t want the pressure of it being on his nephew so it was a last sacrifice he was willing to make. A sacrifice he no longer had to make with Eddie by his side now.
“C’mon old man. I heard music is great for the soul. I have a whole tape you can listen to while you get your treatment.” Eddie pulls out the casket tape tossing it to his uncle. Wayne catches it with a smile on his face. Eddie only smiles back before he throws Wayne a nod. “Now hurry up. I have another mixtape I’m working on for the next session.”
Wayne rolls his eyes with an exaggerated “Alright!” Eddie only laughs knowing his uncle hates being rushed. The two men make their way over to Eddie’s vehicle and get in. Eddie starts the car up and before he pulls out of the driveway, Wayne stops him.
“Thank you, Eddie. You don’t have to do this.”
Eddie gives his uncle a smile reaching over to pat his shoulder. Your words of encouragement play on repeat in his head and he finally starts to believe them.
“You’re strong, Uncle Wayne. We’re going to get through this.”
#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson angst#eddie munson drabble#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson#eddie munson x you#eddie munson fanfic
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ram being in love with the daughter of temple priest and even though he isn't very religious he still went there for sandhya aarti once he saw her one jhumke had fallen and finally able to gather some courage he decided to approach her and they had a talk or something.
also one more request don't use y/n can you pls use the name vaidehi ?
anon!!!! I love this prompt and I hope I did justice to your vision <3 (I'm on a writing high rn so I can actually write fast for once would you look at that?)
yemito ee maya
Two years after Governor Scott's death
Ram slowly walked away from his house, lost in thought. He could feel the wind in his face, rearranging his carefully styled hair and ruffling the shirt he just finished ironing. The sun, shining brightly in his eyes, slowly began its journey back to the horizon as kids laughed and ran back home from school. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath in, letting himself relax. There was a time when he didn’t know what the word relax meant, how it felt to feel his heart rate slowing and have time for himself. Now that he did, he never quite knew what to do with it. Sometimes, he would make a beeline to Bheem or Sita’s house to talk to them or have dinner together, other times, when he didn’t feel like socializing, he would sit at home and read a book. On days like today, when he just couldn’t get himself to pay attention to the words on a page, he’d huff and put down his book to go for a walk, thinking about how much his life and his India has changed.
“Ram anna, chai thaaguthara?” (tl. Do you want to drink chai?)
He turned his head and saw a group of kids at a street food stall looking at him eagerly and quickly recognized all of them from his colony. His mouth curved into a smile as he forgot about his earlier thoughts and started walking towards them, his hands checking his pockets to find his wallet.
“Aa thaguthanu. Anna, okka chai isthava?” (tl. Yes, I’ll drink some. Can you give me one chai?)
As the seller made his chai, he pretended to look in his wallet for money while secretly watching the kids, and smiled with a glint in his eyes as the kids’ faces fell, realizing he didn’t get them anything. He pulled out a 100 rupee note from his wallet and handed it to the vendor, who looked at him confused.
“Migilina paisalu tho pillalu ki vallaku ishtam ainadhi edhaina ivvandi, inka mitha meeru pettukondi.” (Give the kids whatever they want with the remaining money, and if there’s anything left you can keep it for yourself.)
The kids’ eyes widened at him in disbelief, and they quickly ran to the vendor before Ram could have second thoughts and asked for bajjis, dosas, lassis, and whatever else they could think of. Ram chuckled and shook his head, taking a seat at one of the tables and enjoying the warm taste of chai. He was completely aware the colony moms would make their displeasure very well known to him when he went home, but he figured he’d take it if it meant upholding his role as every kid’s favorite person.
The kids sat around him and became engrossed in conversations about their classes, the math teacher they despised, the cricket game they played last night, and a few other things and Ram sat back and listened attentively to their stories while tending to his chai, zoning out only once in a while when the conversation was directed away from him.
At one of these moments, he heard a laugh and the jingling of bangles coming towards them, and he turned his head subconsciously. His jaw dropped as his eyes rested on the source of the laughter: a woman, busy in conversation with a younger girl, walking towards them wearing a beautiful black and yellow saree, her hair tied back in a neat braid, with a book in her hands. As they walked up to her, he suddenly stood up, catching the woman’s attention. When she turned to face him, he held his breath and examined her eyes, bordered with kohl, and the bright red bindi above the bridge of her nose. Silver jhumkas adorned her ears glowing in the sun and the smell of the jasmines in her hair radiated off her, and he was lucky one of the kids pulled on his hand to get his attention. The woman’s face softened as she smiled, turned away from him, and walked away, and he quickly reoriented himself, telling the kids he had other work to do tonight and started in the direction the woman had left towards, promising the kids they’d play cricket together another night.
Ram speedwalked for a few minutes and finally caught up to them, trailing only a few meters behind, but he couldn’t bring himself to approach her. Internally, he was cursing himself out for making this seem easy to Bheem all those years ago, when he himself was such a mess at it. He wished Bheem, Sita, Jenny, the kids, or literally anyone was with him right now to tell him what to do and how not to embarrass himself. His shoe stepped on something and he tripped over, clasping his mouth to make sure no sound came out. When he turned to see what caused it, he found one of her silver jhumkas lying in the dirt. Ram couldn’t believe his luck and he picked up the jhumka, taking it as a sign from the universe to meet her. He then followed her, his faith in himself somehow reinstated simply by the fact he had something of hers in his pocket.
The women approached a Shiva temple, removed their shoes, and entered, and Ram stopped outside. He hadn’t been inside a temple since his father was killed by the British. Everyone close to him had tried to reinstate his faith in god, but he always shut down the idea by stating that if god was real, his father wouldn’t be dead, and if god is real and let his father be killed, then he had every reason to be extremely angry at that god. Ram almost turned around and left, but then he saw the woman returning outside, and froze, realizing she was staring at him.
“Intha dhooram vachi lopadiki raara?” (tl. You came this far, won’t you come in?) she asked. Realizing he was stuck, he slowly took off his shoes and stepped into the temple.
Once he was standing next to her, she asked him what his name was and he replied saying his name is Ram. She introduced herself as Vaidehi, and he said the name back to her, appreciating the way it rolled on his tongue. They sat in the back of the temple, and Vaidehi opened her book and started reading while he examined her features, and noticed she had removed the other jhumka. Ram hated being interrupted while reading, but he also needed to close this silence somehow, so he craned his neck to see what book she was reading.
“Avunu, gudiki vachi em pustakam chaduvuthunnavu? Adhi intlo guda cheyyachu kadha?” (tl. What book are you reading in the temple that you can’t read at home?)
That beautiful laughter that first got him to turn his head towards her escaped her mouth again and she told him his father was the head priest and she enjoyed attending the sandhya aarti whenever she could. She told him about the book she was reading, History of Dharmashastra, and they both fell into an animated conversation about the development of Indian ancient societies and their dreams for a modern and independent India. She said India needed more men like Alluri Ramaraju and he smiled and agreed, hiding the joy in his heart from hearing her say that. He never bothered mentioning that he was Ramaraju because he found it refreshing to talk to people normally without being treated like a savior everywhere he went.
Suddenly, a man, who he assumed was Vaidehi’s father, stood in front of the garbhagriha and everyone in the temple stood up. They recited bhajans, and while Ramaraju knew all of them from memory from his childhood and his mother, he quietly listened to Vaidehi’s voice. At the end, he took the prasadam from one of the other priests and walked back outside with Vaidehi. She asked him if he didn’t know the bhajans, and he replied saying he did, but he enjoyed listening to them much more than singing them, opting to leave out the truth about his father. They talked more about their interests, exchanged addresses, and talked about meeting again. As the sun finally set, she told him she needed to leave, and that they’d definitely meet again. Ram watched her walk away and put his hand in his pocket, touching the jhumka he never returned, whispering, “I promise we will.”
---
(a/n) should I make this a series lmao I have so many ideas for where this could go. also, I haven't been to india in like 6yrs now (curse the pandemic and then school/work) so idr if 100 rupees is acc a reasonable amount for the chai scene 🗿
open tag list: @obsessedtoafault @rambheem-is-real @lil-stark @manwalaage @contemporarykafka @sinistergooseberries @budugu @the-gayest-tree-you-ever-did-see @hufhkbgg @eremin0109 @eenadu-varthalu @hissterical-nyaan @how-is-it-in-london @gauri-vishalakshi @sada-siva-sanyaasi @bromance-minus-the-b @darlingletshurttonight @voidsteffy @itsfookingloosah @mad-who-ra @fadedscarlets @justmeand-myinsight @rasnak2 @ghungru @irisesforyoureyes @vijayasena
I copied a rrr tag list I literally haven't used in a year and tried to remember as many old urls as I could. if you want to be added/removed from the list pls lmk <3
#rrr#rrr fics#rrr movie#ram charan#ss rajamouli#alluri sitarama raju#ntr jr#jr ntr#komaram bheem#desiblr#rrr fanfic#yemito ee maya#shri writes#shri's fics#shri's posts
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Wednesday WIP
Hello! 👋🏽 Nerdie here, I am working on a few things:
1. A second entry for @undercoverpena ‘s April Showers Challenge (maybe featuring an agent I haven’t written for a bit). I had a burst of an idea which was different than the original one I had. Such is a Nerdie brain. Don't get lost in there, but there are cookies.
2. Finally progress of my “Wedding 101 with Dieter” fic! I had been having trouble with it. I’m happy to have more Maya, Dieter and Daisy. 🤭 I apologize to @angelofsmalldeath-codeine in advance for any undue stress I shall cause you.
3. Going to finish up my short Frankie body part series which sounds menacing but is the opposite. 😂 Very much so lol It’s called “Only Parts of you Mr. Morales.”
4. I’m working on a Javier Peña series because I feel like I need to give him something nice. Just one thing. 😆 It's very sweet, I have 2 chapters and no idea what to call it. Pfft, go figure. No idea how long it will be - sorry, won't be ready for a bit. Between Javier P and Joel recent. I need to be nice to them. They’re both very haunted. 😖
5. I'm still working on both Din fics and Benny. I'm redoing the outlines. Bullet points are friends and not our enemies. I think. Will there be more random Star Wars people? Is Obi Wan Kenobi a children’s author and Luke that old man who swings his lightsaber in the yard?! Both these things are true. 😌 Messing with Star Wars canon one character at a time. 😂😂😂 The sweet Din fic will remain so. My walking pile of nervous Beskar. 💚
And that's about it, I've cut back a bit on writing to do more school work (papers...ugh...writing about not Pedro. 👀 Eww...)
Previews under the cut:
Anyway, somehow, I went from being stuck in chapter five for 'Weddings 101 with Dieter' to now being in chapter six. I'd like to thank Hemmy for being so encouraging and @megamindsecretlair for discussing Pedro and Oscar with me the other night. I feel like I should make notes and keep both of those in mind for future fics because it's the right thing to do.🫡 Just thinking about it is… 🫠
This is a small excerpt from chapter six, we should all know Nerdie's humor by now 🤣:
“Who’s banging on my door this damn early?! You better get out of here!”
“Dee at least ask who it is.”
“I don’t care, it could be the president, pope or, no Beyonce could come in.”
“I am not meeting Beyonce in my robe. My hair is a mess, my face is puffy, I haven’t showered yet…that’s not who it is!”
“I mean, if she shows up on this door, she’s gonna have to be okay with my bare ass, balls and your robe with your cute puffy face. It’s just us. You don’t need one. I’m just going to take it back off to eat you for-”
“MR. BRAVO IT’S ME ZACK! YOUR ASSISTANT!” He screamed, he didn’t need to hear Dieter removing anything off of Maya or eating her in any capacity, they can do that after he leaves later. Never any filter with this damn man, he just needs to remind himself of his loans. This job pays the loans.
Gotta love how....open Dieter is with everything. Even Sasha Fierce is not safe. 😭
Second is from my pending Javier Peña fic (I'll think of a good name, I swear!):
Meeting his gaze had her mouth run dry, the sandy tone to his skin contrasted with more papaya tones in his neck. Dark hair and kind eyes behind a gold pair of aviators perched on his curved nose. Tourmaline waves parted on the left side of his crown were matched by his bold eyebrows and thick mustache. His lips were a lace pink and plush. The sunlight made the sweat along his neck glimmer, accentuating its definition. The light blue shirt made the reds and browns in his skin stand out even more. “Did you need to get some fresh air too?” She asked, he could be doing that, escaping someone like she was doing or something else entirely. Now she was curious too, about this man who’d chosen to sit next to her.
I very much enjoy my description of Javier, hehe 😉
That's it! Normally I have more, but it's either still in bullet form or in my head. 🤭
NPT: @maggiemayhemnj @604to647 @connectioneverywhere @morallyinept @rhoorl
@goodwithcheese @soft-persephone @djarinmuse @pedroshotwifey @magpiepills
@secretelephanttattoo @tinytinymenace @inept-the-magnificent @soft-girl-musings @mysterious-moonstruck-musings
@laurfilijames @grogusmum @alltheglitterandtheroar @jessthebaker @musings-of-a-rose
@julesonrecord @wannab-urs @schnarfer
#wip wednesday#Nerdie update#javier pena fanfiction#dieter bravo fanfiction#din djarin fanfiction#benny miller#pedro pascal fanfiction#fanfiction
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Hello my love!!
No smut but would you mind writing a request with Joe where him and the reader get a little bit drunk at a wrap party and get all touchy feely dancing together and almost kissing and stuff and everyone is like “about time you two!”
Wrap party - J.K
this is such a cute request i can’t! my imagines are so short recently so i am sorry about that but i hope this is okay <3
outfit ^
you had finished filming season 4 of Stranger Things and to say you weren’t proud was an understatement. you had achieved so much in such a small amount of time and you’d achieved everything you’d wanted. you were at the season 4 wrap party, it was filled with people who worked on the series and some other famous people who you had been dying to meet since you started to peruse your acting career. you had grown a bond with every single one of the cast members and by this point you would consider them family. you were extremely close with Maya and Joe. you were casted as Steve’s love interest who he was pining over throughout the whole of season four and that’s how you all became so close.
they were definitely your favourite people on set. you were sat at the bar, drinking cocktails with Joseph, someone else who you were super close with. you were both talking how mad it was how one show could throw you into fame and because it was both your first ‘big’ show, you understood each other a lot. Joseph was also the only one to know that you had a massive crush on Joe. he was the one who made your feelings obvious. you denied it but he knew you too well so you had to tell him. “isn’t it crazy that we just filmed an entire series and now we’re properly famous” you said, the alcohol starting to set in. Joseph nodded his head and spoke up. “it’s weird but it was nice that we became friends, i wouldn’t have anyone to make fun of” he said, you laughed and pushed his shoulder. “have you spoken to Joe yet?” he questioned. you had promised him that you would say something but you didn’t know how.
you shook your head ‘no’ and he sighed. “you need to
tell him. it’s bad keep it in” he said, putting a hand on your shoulder. “i can’t tell him because he doesn’t feel the same way” you said, standing up, walking away to find Maya. you were embarrassed by the situation. you didn’t want to be rejected by him and by staying friends meant you wouldn’t lose him fully. you found Maya sat down, talking to Grace and you sat down next to her. you all were drinking and talking about the new season and family life before you saw Joe walk up to Joseph who was still at the bar.
your heart dropped. you were praying that Joseph wasn’t telling Joe about your feelings. you really wanted to tell him but you were scared. “should we go dance? this is my favourite song” Maya said, sliding out of the booth. you both nodded and followed her to the dance floor. “y/n!” you heard someone shout. you thought you were hallucinating, you turned to where you thought you heard your voice and saw Joe, walking briskly to you. you smiled at him and walked to meet him half way. “Joey, i missed you” you said, pulling him for a hug. this was the first time you’d seen him in three days and you felt at ease in his arms.
“oh i missed you more, you look beautiful” he said, hugging you back. you were both definitely drunk and when you get drunk, things you regret happen. “thank you Joey, you don’t look to bad yourself. wanna come dance with me?” you said, pulling your head out of his chest to look into his eyes. he nodded and took hold of your hand and pulled you to the dance floor. you both danced together and by the way you were dancing, people were most defiantly thinking you were a couple. Joe’s hands were around your waist and your arms were wrapped around his neck. you felt Joe plant a few kisses over your cheeks and forehead before he put his head in your neck, leaving small kisses there as well.
“oh yay! you guys finally told each other” you heard Maya say as she gushed over you two. Joseph came over as well and spoke up. “about time you two!” he shouted, putting a hand on Joe’s back. Joe looked up from your neck, eyes glossed over. you had no idea what they were talking about. it was just two friends, dancing at a wrap party. “what are you guys talking about ‘told each other’. we haven’t told each other anything” Joe said, turning to Maya, a hand still around your waist. “wait you guys haven’t talked about your feelings?” Maya said, eyes wide. you shook your head and turned to Joe. a bright red blush covered your cheeks. the two of them ran away, leaving you and Joe, alone. “well, that’s not how it was supposed to go” Joe said, taking your hand, leading you to the night club entrance.
you both walked outside, a confused expression on your face. “this is not the way i wanted my feelings to come out but i guess it’s too late. i really really like you y/n and i want to be your boyfriend” Joe said, putting both hands on your cheeks. you were shocked. the boy you loved was expressing his feelings to you. “oh Joe. i like you too” you said, leaning in to kiss him on the lips. you’d finally got the boy you’d been dreaming of thanks to your two best friends who didn’t know when to keep their mouths shut, but nevertheless, you were also grateful for them. if it wasn’t for them you wouldn’t be with Joe right now.
#fanfiction#joe keery fanfic#joe keery fandom#joe keery one shot#joe keery x reader#joe keery#joe keery au#joe keery imagines#joe keery blurb#joe keery imagine#joe keery x you#joe keery x y/n#steve harrington#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington one shot#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington imagines#imagines#fanfictions#requested#requests#kurt kunkle#kurt kunkle x reader#kurt kunkle fanfic#kurt kunkle blurb#kurtsworld96#kurt kunkle x you
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RIDE TALK
« You’re still mad at me ? » Florian asked before taking a blow of his cigaret
She was.
« A little. But to be honest I’m glad you called. » Maya answered looking at the window.
Florian put his hand on one of her tight, near her knee and squeezed it a little.
« Well, like I told you last time, I’d like to apologize for what I said-
« I know -
« Let me finish » he finally crashed his cigaret in the cendar, passed his thick fingers on his eyebrows before finally looking at his girlfriend.
Since the two years they were together, they always managed to work things through their arguments.
« Look, I messed up, I’m sorry for what I have done and you know I would never say things to hurt you on purpose, it was super clumsy. »
Maya looked at him, listening closely every words he was saying. Indeed, telling his friends, while he was a little tipsy, that she was nothing but being full of drama lately, hurted her.
It was not totally false. They were at a moment of their relation where they were disagree on a lot of things. They had more arguments in the last 3 months than in their entire relation.
But for Maya those things were private. It was between him and her. She managed not to tell so much about her relationship to her friends. Maya didn’t want Florian to do the same with his friends, he could do whatever he wanted, he was a grown man. But at least he didn’t have to act like she was the bad guy.
She had her wrongs and so he did. It just that this situation was kind of, humiliating for her.
He apologized. And he heard out what she had to say. She needed to let it go.
« I’m sorry about being so stubborn lately. I don’t like arguing with you. And it is worse when it last for weeks. » she said squeezing softly his hand.
« Exactly. » he whispered looking at her and licking his lips
This voice. Maya felt her lashes go up and down quickly and her blood pressure raised up. It was not fair. She wondered if he could see her blush through her dark cheek. He was too much. She didn’t know if it was the outfit, the cologne or just the fact that she haven’t see him in a while, but she missed her man.
« I swear I wanted to talk to you earlier but I wanted to give you space and I was afraid you give me that look » he said pushing a braid out of her face.
« What look ? » Maya asked arching an eyebrow, a slight smile on the corner of her mouth.
« The one who means « I’m ready to kill you if you don’t fix what you just said » he said miming her voice
« Oh my god » she chuckled « first of all I’m not even talking like that » Maya said laughing
« You are » he answered chuckling
« And second I could never kill you » Maya said grabbing his bearded chin With one hand
« Oh yeah ? » he told looking at her up and down. Her eyes couldn’t look at him so she chose to nod, looking at his lips.
« So you can give me that kiss I been craving for huh ? » he asked brushing his thumb on his own lips
Anticipation was killing him. He needed to feel his girlfriend’s lips. If it was only on him, he would already been all over her. The new little black dress she had on was definitely a good investment. The way her perfume fulfilled his car, the way she kept putting her blond braids behind her ear, and moreover the way she kept looking at him with those big brown eyes. Man. Those eyes were his weakness.
« Are there things you crave for ? Really ? « she said in a fake surprise tone and got closer to him
« Stop playing, you know I crave for you » Florian whispered back, getting himself closer to his girl.
—-
Window’s car were now steamy. The contrast between the cold weather of the dark night and the increasing temperature was affecting them. Jackets were removed. Neither Maya or Florian needed them anymore. The tall man was the first to take off the inessential coat. Maya was less fast to remove hers, not really sure to want what she was going to do.
But damn she missed him so much. She was taken in his storm and a little voice in her head was daring her to be more spontaneous in her relationship.
She was glad she decided to wear that particular dress for that ride talk. Now bouncing on her boyfriend’s lap in the back of his Mercedes, it was indeed a very smart choice.
A loud moan felt from Florian’s throat, Maya was literally fucking him tonight. The way she bounced on him with determination and with the perfect rhythm was driving him insane. He couldn’t lie, he was surprised she didn’t stopped him when he slipped his fingers in her soaked underwear. Usually Maya was more the type of woman who rather be intimate between closed doors. Right now it was another story.
Maya was rolling her hips into his, the sound flesh clapping his and the feel her juice dripping between his laps was making him see stars.
« Babe » he whispered as his head felt back on the headrest and his large hands gripped harder his girlfriend’s ass.
Maya remove her right hand from his shoulder and put it on his jaw before kissing him with eager.
She tried to tell him and how much she missed and love him, but all her sentences were turning invalid when he gripped her braids and started telling her naughty things. Maya made a mess shorly after listening all the dirty things her boyfriends told her and genuinely asked herself 2 questions. Why was she so turned on by degrading words ? And how Florian got this good at it ?
When he came from his high, Florian wrapped his arms around her torso, soothing her with caring kisses on her neck and cheeks.
Maya tried to catch her breath her arms wrapped around his neck, enjoying the feelings of his hair under nails
« I should piss you off more often » Florian said smiling.
—
Obviously this project do not belong to any of the long stories I have started and plan to end one day (?) but it’s been in my files for ages 🤣
#florian munteanu#florian munteanu x black reader#viktor drago#big nasty#florian munteanu x reader#florian munteanu headcanons
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New series coming!
*loosely based off a show I watched and parts of my own life.
Dear Elliot Mae,
By the time you read this letter you’ll be roughly 15 years old. I made this letter when you were little so I could tell you the story from start to finish on how we met.
Before I met you I was a different person. You changed me. So here’s how we met.
My names Maya and I come from a very rich, very high family orientated family. I have 3 brothers and 3 sisters. My mother believes family is the most important thing in the world and success within our family is a must. However I wasn’t like them. I was different. You see I never wanted a family, I never wanted kids. What gave me great pleasure in life was my job. At the age of sixteen I was given opportunity to work in the office of the brindleton bay district police force. I’d file paper work, get everyone coffee. You know all the small things. All of us children had jobs because our parents believed in if we wanted our trust inheritance we needed to go out into the world and experience money for ourselves too. Most of my siblings tried out jobs but preferred to be at home and quit. Not me though, I got a rush from working and especially in the police force. By the time I was 18 I stared my Cadetship and ranked fast for my age. Now I’m an undercover private investigator as well as a forensic investigator. I worked many hours and yet I was complete. My family didn’t approve of my job nor my lifestyle choices. By the time I was twenty years old I was expected to have a partner and be ready to stay at home as a housewife and bare children. I didn’t choose this and thus my family became very confused and angry at me.
Time went on and I didn’t change my mind. The idea of children made my skin crawl. I just wasn’t maternal. I remember the day my nephews and nieces were born and they’d ask me hold them and I got no maternal deep bullshit feeling your suppose to have over holding a baby. It just wasn’t my thing. I always felt like the odd one in my family but it didn’t bother me because I liked who I was.
Over time my parents tried to threaten me into marriage. I had boyfriends but I loosely use the term boyfriend as I was so obsessed with working I didn’t see a point in a long term relationship. When you go through your training you realise that criminal and those around you always go for the emotional attachments their victims have. Eg: partners, family. If I didn’t have that. I wasn’t seen as an ideal target. So I’d have “boyfriends” come and go and that was that.
*to be continued
#sims 4 screenshots#sims4#sims 4 cc#sims 4#sims 4 gameplay#the sims cc#sims4cc#sims4build#sims 4 discord#sims 4 community
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In the Middle of the Night: Ch 27
Chapter 27: "난 온기 없는 어둠 속을"
Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30
MASTERLIST
Summary: As Bangtan prepares for a new chapter in their lives, they head to their private property in the forest for a songwriting workshop. As a songwriter and producer they have worked with for years, I’m asked to tag along. I was ready for the heavy workload and small amount of sleep during the workshop week. However, I wasn’t ready for the storm that came that changed my friendship with Namjoon forever.
Notes: More therapy. This is the breakdown of what's going on with Maya...mostly everything. There's a ton more, but focusing on just her issues with Namjoon here. Enjoy! :D
Pairing: Idol!RM/Namjoon x OFC
Genre: Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Smut
Rating: M (sexual scenes/sexual assault in prior chapters)
Status: COMPLETE
Warnings/spoilers: Therapy
*********
“I guess it wasn’t a fight, really,” I said after finishing telling the story. “It was more of a miscommunication. Namjoon and I always referred to it as our ‘big fight’, though.”
It had taken more than one session for me to tell the full story to Dr. Rob. There were pieces I couldn’t remember; I had to ask Yoongi to help me fill in the gaps. Dr. Rob continued to ask questions—wanting more details in certain parts of the stories.
“You and Namjoon didn’t start getting close until after your move to Korea, right?” Dr. Rob asked, looking down at his notes, and wrote something down.
“Yes.”
“That was two years after you two reconciled?”
I nodded.
He took a long pause and looked to consider something before talking again. “You describe your friendship with Jin as playful and platonic. When did you start feeling close to him? You mentioned Jungkook, Jin, and Namjoon were the last ones you still hadn't gotten close to.”
It didn’t seem odd that Dr. Rob was asking me questions about my friendship with the other guys. He had been asking similar questions throughout the last two sessions as I told him the story of Namjoon and my fight. However, I was interested in how all of this mattered with my relationship with Namjoon—and even more so, how it tied to the walls I put up.
“I think it was after Namjoon and my fight. The guys went on vacation days after. Jin and I messaged each other a lot. He sent me a lot of silly photos of their trip. There’s a video of Yoongi being drunk and Jin convincing him to perform a girl group song all on his own,” I said, laughing at the memory. I still had the video and watched it whenever I wanted a good laugh.
Dr. Rob gave a nod and noted something else. “So, it’s right to say that out of all the guys, Namjoon was the last one you became friends with?”
I nodded.
“And that it took two years longer than the rest of the guys?”
And then I finally caught on to what he might be implying. “Do you think I kept Namjoon at a distance after we reconciled?”
Dr. Rob shrugged. “In those two years, before he called you during your panic attack, did you guys exchange messages with each other—just as friends, nothing to do with work?”
Thinking deeply, I couldn’t give him an answer. I couldn’t remember.
“You said on multiple occasions that your friendship with Namjoon really took off after he helped you through your panic attack. That was two years after your fight. Perhaps in those previous years, deep within you, you held onto that fight,” Dr. Rob suggested.
After taking a step back and considering Dr. Rob’s words, I spoke up. “You mean to say, subconsciously I’m unable to trust Namjoon because of that fight? All those years ago?”
“It might be multilayered,” Dr. Rob answered. “There’s the hurt from the fight. You thought of him as a friend and entrusted him with information about yourself that was very personal only to find out he didn’t think of you as a friend back. That created trust issues. Then there’s the layer of your view of friends and partners—you trust your friends with your emotions, but with your partners, you’re very guarded. In the past, you felt shame in sharing emotions. You were ridiculed by your exes. You were made fun of and dismissed by them. There's also the layer of Namjoon reacting similarly to those exes. He made a judgment of your sexuality. You shared personal information with him, believing it was safe for you to do so, only for him to throw it to your face. And then there’s the possibility that you’re self-sabotaging this relationship.
“After years of unhealthy relationships, this bond with Namjoon seems very alien to you. Your fight or flight responses are kicking in—making you want to run off or do whatever you can to drive Namjoon off. You did it years ago when you guys were only friends—or colleagues. You wanted to rid him of your life before he had another chance to hurt you. And then you did it the night of your break up. Rather than stay while the argument is happening, or wait for him to come back, you took off.”
I let Dr. Rob’s words sink in. I thought carefully about what he had observed, but something wasn’t sitting right with me. “I know Namjoon would never treat me the same as my exes, though. There’s not an ounce of meanness in his body.”
“Then why did it hurt so much when he said you ‘give it up easily’?” Dr. Rob challenged.
I was too stunned to respond. He had a point there. Those words had brought out emotions that were familiar. Emotions I hadn't felt since my last asshole ex.
Dr. Rob’s face softened as he looked straight at me. “I’m not saying Namjoon’s cruel. I’m saying he’s human. Everyone makes mistakes. We’re all capable of saying things we don’t mean when we’re angry and regret it later. It’s not an excuse. But it’s important for you not to put him on a pedestal. Because there’s only one way he can go when he makes a mistake: down.”
“I put Namjoon on a pedestal?” I asked, taken aback by his use of the word.
“I think you do. It goes along with your belief you’re not his ‘exception’. You said, and I quote,” he looked down at his notes and read, “‘He knows how to make everyone feel special. I don’t think I’m an exception'. You are the one who put emphasis on ‘everyone’.” Dr. Rob stared at me for a while, allowing the words to sink in. “He must be extraordinary to make everyone feel special. And that’s how you see him: extraordinary. But after the two occasions he messed up, walls come up which blocked this extraordinary person from coming in and knowing you—someone who can be hisexception.”
I didn’t realize I was crying until I felt wetness on my lap. I wiped the tears off and internally screamed at myself. Dr. Rob’s analysis of me was making complete sense and answered so many questions. And it was angering me. “Why am I doing that to him?”
“It’s a defense mechanism, Maya,” Dr. Rob said gently. “Your entire childhood, your emotions weren’t protected. Your primitive role models neglected every emotion you had. Your physical needs were met, but your emotional ones were not. You don’t see yourself as special outside of your musical talents. You’re rejecting him before he can reject you. Just take a look at your response just now: ‘Why am I doing that to him?’ Rather than trying to figure out why you’re doing this to yourself, you keep thinking of him. I’m not saying not to think of him—but you must put your emotional needs in higher regard.”
“How do I stop doing that?” I asked.
“Hard work—like last time,” he said.
I took a breath. I remember that hard work. It was mentally and emotionally exhausting. But it had been worth it. I felt more centered and whole the more sessions I had with Dr. Rob. I was ready to have that feeling again.
*************
I arrived at my house with the clear determination to head straight to bed; however, Yoongi was having none of that.
“I made budae jjigae,” he said, leading me from the living room to the kitchen.
Pouting and almost stomping my feet, I followed. “Where are Kiwoo and Dal?” I asked, referring to the two Big Hit staff who were also staying at the house.
“Taking a nap. We were out the entire day.”
“Is Ky being a good chauffeur?” I asked as we arrived at the kitchen island. “Be sure you’re getting your money’s worth with that stingy ass.”
Yoongi chuckled. “Today he asked for seafood.”
“He really has no shame. Don’t tell me you got him VIP passes for your show in Seoul.”
“I did.”
“That cheap, son of a bitch needs to start paying for stuff. You should have given him nosebleed seats.”
“He took us to a Clippers game again. We took normal seats, though. No press noticed, so I was able to enjoy the game.”
“Did he buy?”
“Why do you think we had normal seats?” Yoongi asked with a smile.
Figures. Kyong would never pay for floor seats.
I took a seat as Yoongi went to the stove.
“So, how did it go today?” he asked, taking a bowl, and starting to serve me.
I gave a stretch and let out a groan. “There was a lot to unpack.”
Giving a brief summary of the session and what Dr. Rob had analyzed, Yoongi listened intently. He gave little nods here and there, agreeing mostly with Dr. Rob’s words.
“Do you think I put Namjoon on a pedestal?” I asked Yoongi after I was done telling him about Dr. Ron’s analysis.
There was a moment of quietness as Yoongi looked to think about his next words. “Namjoonie is quite the individual. Brilliant, talented, and hardworking. It’s impossible to know him and not notice how special he is. Before even meeting him, I was told how gifted he was. I was jealous, I won’t lie. I hadn’t even met the guy and everyone around me was praising this son of a bitch like he was the next Tablo. But then I met him, and I understood what the hype was about. I wasn’t about to admit it, though," he said with a laugh as he remembered.
I smiled back a little. Namjoon and Yoongi's relationship had been quite intense from the beginning. Looking at them, one wouldn't understand how they could ever belong in the same group; let alone, live together 24/7.
Yoongi let out a sigh, his face going back to serious. "That jealousy didn't last long, though. You know why?”
“Why?” I asked, hanging onto his every word.
“I saw the weight he carried. I saw the light he brought to everyone’s eyes. And I witnessed the damage it caused him when people realized he was only a man. He would make a mistake and the way they looked at Namjoonie completely changed. And disappointing others was one of Namjoonie’s worst fears. He was only 17 and he was carrying so much shit. I was grateful that wasn’t me. But I felt empathy for the poor kid.
“For over a decade, I have seen how people look at him like he’s a god. At stadiums, fan meetings, crowds, and random people in public. He’s up on a pedestal to countless individuals. I’ve seen it with some of the guys as well. But I don’t think I’ve seen that look as intense as I’ve seen it in you.”
I took it in, opening myself up to accepting it. “I didn’t know I was doing it. It’s not fair to him,” I said.
Yoongi let out a heavy sigh. “It’s not fair for you either, Maiwa. Dr. Rob is right: you need to start considering your emotional needs.”
I nodded, agreeing with him. I had done it again without realizing it.
“Did Dr. Rob recommend any exercises for that? Give you any homework?” Yoongi asked.
I had and I told Yoongi what they were. “He said I should also get back to writing.”
Yoongi frowned at my use of words. “You haven’t written?”
I shook my head.
“On purpose?”
Nod.
“Why?”
Dr. Rob had asked me the same question. When Yoongi asked it, I reacted the same. Nerves started to kick in. I disliked talking about my emotions, especially when it dealt with my vulnerabilities. “I’ve been too scared to. I reach for a pen or pencil, but then I start panicking. Dr. Rob thinks it’s still tied to my fear. Writing about that night will open up the floodgates to everything I’ve been holding in about him.”
There was a long silence.
I had said a lot and was too chicken shit to say more.
But Yoongi dared to ask. “What have you been holding in?”
A heaviness in my chest appeared. I felt the tears coming before they escaped my eyes. Thinking about this made me feel fucking scared. It was a fear I had always felt but suppressed. But Namjoon had brought it to the surface. In the months we had been together, he had managed to fish it out of me.
But I was reacting like a fish would once it was brought to the surface—suffocated, struggling, fighting to get back in the water. Craving to swim back deep into the sea that was full of darkness. It was a darkness that I was familiar with; however dangerous it might be. But there was no way I could go back. Namjoon’s hook would not let me go.
Warm arms held me, giving me a bit of oxygen as I struggled here on the surface.
“Perhaps it would be better to let it out on paper first,” Yoongi said gently.
I stayed in his embrace for a while, needing some time to calm down. Once I was settled, I made my way up the stairs and forced myself to go to my small office slash mini studio.
Deciding I wasn’t going to hide anymore, I decided to write.
Making my way to my stool, I took out one of my journals and grabbed my favorite guitar. I let my fingers do the work. My voice was shit, but I still hit the record button, not allowing myself to pause. For an hour, I let the mic pick up everything.
Didn’t know how to tell you the truth/ Don’t know why I do what I do/ Don’t know what I’m trying to prove/ Want to know the reasons why I do what I do
I care for you/ But I’ve acted a fool
Need a shot glass in my fist/ So I can spill away all my business/ Telling this stranger about you/ I ’m getting too personal
Can they tell I’ve been crying all night/ I told myself I don’t care for you/ But I know it’s a lie/ Because I do
**************
As much as I was grateful for Yoongi being there, he couldn't stay forever. His departure day had finally arrived.
He allowed me to hug him, making me promise to call him if I needed a friend.
It was hard to see him go, but it was good for me. I needed time by myself to collect my thoughts. Needed to be left alone to write and sing freely. Dr. Rob had been right. Now that I had gotten back to my art, I felt more grounded. The fear I had was starting to get more tolerable.
The day after Yoongi left, I was back at Dr. Rob’s office.
We were in the middle of another session when he caught onto something I had said and he was wanting me to further explain myself.
We were going over the breakup night again and I made a mention how I was silly in trying to hide my fight with my mother in the bathroom. I should have known better than to think Namjoon wouldn’t know I was lying to him. He always knew when I was lying, he knew me too damn well.
“Why is it such a bad thing that he knows you so well?” Dr. Rob asked, curiously. “Every time you say or hint towards how well Namjoon knows you, you have this look on your face. Like you don’t like it.”
“I don’t,” I said honestly, tugging at the ends of my shirt.
“Why is that?”
“I don’t know…. Namjoon always seems to know what’s going on in my head before I do. It’s a little scary.”
Dr. Rob was quiet for a moment as he looked through his notes. “I remember an ex of yours—I believe he was your first serious relationship. You described him as—and I quote, ‘a sick fuck who knew me so well, he knew what to say and do to embarrass and belittle me. It didn’t matter if we were alone or in public, but he had this special power that made him able to read people—especially me—very well. And he used it all for evil.’”
I remembered that ex. He was my first serious boyfriend. He never hit me, but he certainly used words to fuck me up. But Namjoon had never made me feel that way. “Namjoon would never use my secrets against me.”
Dr. Rob gave me a long look before presenting me with an interesting viewpoint. “On the night of your breakup, Namjoon telling you, you ‘gave it up so easily’ made you feel negative. You had entrusted him with something very intimate about your past sexual experiences. You felt safe to do so and that night, he used it against you," he reminded me.
I don't know why I kept forgetting that part.
“Again, Namjoon is human. You need to see him as so. Negating his faults is not fair to him or you,” Dr. Rob said. “He hurt you with those words. Whether he intended to or not. And it’s ok to be upset with him for it.”
I nodded, understanding. “It’s definitely something I’m going to need to talk to him about. It’s just…I don’t like being angry with him. I don’t think I have ever been upset with him for too long—even during our big fight all those years ago. I mostly was hurt but didn’t feel furious with him. Thinking about talking to him regarding this makes me feel anxious, to be honest.”
“I don’t remember you having anxiety when you met with your ex after your breakup. You met with him shortly after starting sessions with me. You wanted closure with him and you seemed pretty relaxed about it. Namjoon is different.”
“He is.”
Dr. Rob stared at me for a long while. “Being upset with Namjoon won’t make you care for him any less. And you care for him a lot.”
I nodded in agreement.
Once again, he was quiet. “I think you know what I’m indirectly saying when I use that word….”
My heart began to race because I do know what he was alluding to. And I knew he was going to make me say it. Because in the many sessions, we had had the past three weeks, I hadn’t said it.
“Well….” He pressed.
I took a breath. I knew I needed to let it out. I needed to face it. Namjoon had always made me feel so incredibly vulnerable and even though he wasn’t here, it certainly felt like he could hear me; as if he was waiting for the words.
“I love him,” I admitted, feeling my chest crack as I did.
I went through a series of emotions. I was a blubbering mess for a good while. “I’ve never said it first. It always took me months to say it back when my past boyfriends said it to me.”
“Similar to the question I asked earlier about the problem you have with Namjoon knowing you so well: why is it such a bad thing to admit the feeling? Why not ever say it first?”
It took a long moment for me to admit it. I had always known the answer, discovered it a while back right after my breakup with Jerry, but had never let anyone know. “It seems silly, but it feels as if I was giving away a vulnerability as soon as I say it. And I don’t like feeling vulnerable.”
Dr. Rob nodded. “Makes sense you hate feeling vulnerable. If you did, who could you turn to? You’ve shared the stories of the rare times you sought help from your parents only to be brushed away—made to think your emotions were unimportant. It's the fear of being abandoned and/or rejected. It’s manifested into your adulthood and your adult relationships. You allow people in, but only up to a certain point. You draw a line. It was the root of your and Jerry’s problems. You didn't let Jerry in. And now you're doing it with Namjoon.”
A rotten thought made its way into my insecurity. “Jerry wanted to stay,” I pointed out. “He proposed even though we had our problems. Does that mean he loved me more than Namjoon?” The thought was enough to make it feel like a knife was cutting straight into me. To think Namjoon didn’t love me the way I wanted him to….
Dr. Rob took a moment before answering. “That’s one way you can look at it. Or you can look at it like Namjoon knows his worth. Knows that a relationship that isn’t open and honest will fail. He doesn’t want a failed relationship with you.”
He had a point there. Namjoon was fully confident in his worth; he had moments of low self-esteem but would never stay in a situation that would cause him damage.
“How do you think he feels about you?” Dr. Rob asked.
With every fiber in my body, I was certain I knew the answer. It had been a while since I had known the answer. It thrilled me to know it but terrified me. “He loves me.”
“Has he told you he loved you?”
I shook my head, wiping away some tears and keeping my head slightly down.
“Why do you think he hasn’t said it first?”
It was another answer I knew and it broke my heart to know it. “Because he knew how I would react. He was afraid of scaring me off.”
“So you know him just as well as he knows you,” Dr. Rob observed.
We were quiet for a moment. I bathed in the feeling I had admitted those words out loud. Bathed in the scary notion that Namjoon possessed a part of me that no longer belonged to solely me. My heart hadn’t been my own in a while and facing that fact was causing me to go through some frightening emotions.
“Your past boyfriends always judged your male friendships. It was one of the reasons why the relationships didn’t work out. Their accusations would make you angry, and defensive. That’s how you handled disagreements in the past. With Namjoon, you closed up. Like you did many years ago. Back then, he’s the one who messed up and he did his best to correct it.”
“Now I need to correct things. I need to open up,” I concluded.
“If you want a relationship with him—or anyone, for that matter—you’re going to have to. At least, a healthy one.”
“I want to fix things,” I said with determination.
I had messed up this time. It was my turn to correct it. And to correct it, I needed to view these emotions I had for Namjoon as something not scary. Because it wasn’t. It shouldn’t be.
********
AN: So, I woke up sick! Thankfully, I worked on most of the editing on this chapter earlier in the week. That being said, I'm not sure I'll have enough strength and/or time to go over the next chapter before next Friday. I might either post late on the weekend (depending on how I feel) or just take my time with it and post Chapter 28 in two weeks...
Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30
MASTERLIST
#rm smut#rm x reader#rm x oc#bts smut#namjoon smut#namjoon fanfic#namjoon x reader#namjoon x maya#inthemiddleofthenight#therapy#trust issues#Spotify
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The Deluca-Bishop and Diaz-Buckley Guide to Navigating a Relationship Where One Partner Figuratively and Literally Cannot Stop Running Into Burning Buildings
A few days after making this post, I started to work on a Maya Bishop meets Evan Buckley crossover fic. I finally finished it. I would like to thank @firefighterbracket for the inspiration. This was a lot of fun to write. The working title of this document was "Reckless Bisexual Childhood Trauma 'Siblings.'"
This fic is set a few months post-canon and complies with known canon as of May 3, 2023.
------------------
“You died, Buck. Again. You can’t just walk that off.”
…
On the other side of the curtain, a similar conversation played out.
…
Carina paused, taking a deep breath. “And you. You almost died, Maya. Again. We need to talk about that.”
Content Warnings: Mentions of Death, Hospital Setting
Read on AO3
Read on Tumblr below the cut
“This is so good,” Maya said between mouthfuls of pizza. “It is much better than anything we could have had in Seattle.”
“You didn’t need to fly me all the way to California just to eat pizza,” Carina teased. “What’s this about?”
“Even though the ‘official’ reason I’m in LA is a department-sponsored training on fighting brush fires, I thought it’d be nice to take a short vacation as just the two of us.” Maya paused to analyze the expression of her wife, who had just stopped eating. “Is everything okay?”
“I am just so in love with you,” Carina confessed.
“Oh-” Maya giggled. She lightly shook her head in an attempt to stop the rising rosiness on her cheeks. A little flustered, her eyes scanned the view of the city from the restaurant patio when she suddenly felt something was off. She tried to distract herself by digging a hair tie out of her purse and pulling her hair back into a ponytail, but Maya’s off-put feelings only intensified.
Carina, noticing this change in her wife’s behavior, asked, “What’s wrong?”
“Do you smell that?” When Maya received no answer, she continued. “I think I smell smoke. Something around here is on fire. I should go.”
“Maya, stay,” Carina pleaded. “I am sure that the local fire department is perfectly capable of handling it.”
“But-”
“Maya, you just said it yourself. You are not at work. You are on vacation with me. Let’s enjoy it together, please.”
“What if someone needs-”
“HELP!” a voice called out from down the street, finishing and answering Maya’s question. A man in a purple polo shirt and khakis ran around the corner at the end of the street and stopped to catch his breath. Again, he called out, “I need some help!”
Maya jumped out of her seat and started sprinting down the sidewalk, leaving her small crossbody purse on the table next to her pizza. “Sir,” she shouted, “my name is Lieutenant Maya Bishop. I am an off-duty firefighter and paramedic from the Seattle Fire Department. What do you need?”
“I’m the principal of the school just down the block,” the man responded. “There was an accident in one of our science labs, and the fire department is still five minutes out. I need help with the kids.”
Carina didn’t even try to stop her wife. She just sighed, pulled $40 out of her wallet, and tucked the cash under a plate on the table. Carina grabbed both her purse and Maya’s purse and ran after her wife.
----------
The step-down unit at LA County General Hospital had been able to get some new beds when COVID hit, but they weren’t able to get new rooms. This meant that some rooms held more than one patient. The step-down staff generally tried to avoid more than one person per room, but when the ICU and step-down were at capacity, only a privacy curtain separated one bed from the other. Most of the kids injured in the fire had been diverted to pediatric hospitals or placed in the PICU, but the influx of other patients meant that LA County General’s step-down had to start doubling up.
Having seen another patient on the other side of the curtain as he walked into the room, Eddie kept his voice down as he talked with a newly-awake Buck. “They’re treating some kids and adults for second-degree burns and smoke inhalation, but no one has stayed dead.”
“What do you mean, ‘stayed dead’?” Buck asked.
“You carried a kid out to triage, and Hen noticed that you looked bad. She wouldn’t let you go back inside until you got some Oxygen and she did a workup. You were drenched in sweat, so she couldn’t get the leads on the monitor to stick. She got them to stick, but she only got two seconds of monitor readout before you arrested. You were in asystole for 72 seconds. It was Hen that caught the hyperkalemia and brought you back. You should call her.”
“Do we know what caused it?” Buck followed up.
“Not with certainty. The doctors think it was a combination of the beta blockers they started you on, the amount you were sweating, exertion, and probably something else.”
“How long until I can get back to work?”
“You died, Buck. Again. You can’t just walk that off.”
“I was dead for a shorter amount of time this time. I can’t stop being a firefighter -- it’s what I’m meant to do.”
“I don’t want you to stop being a firefighter. Take it from someone that has tried not being a firefighter: you don’t need to quit your job to save your life. You just need to make your health and safety a priority, Evan.”
On the other side of the curtain, a similar conversation played out. Upon waking, Maya looked around the room for Carina, and a sense of relief washed over her when she saw Carina seated in a chair pulled up next to the side of the bed. “Carina,” Maya said, though her strained voice had a hard time escaping the nonrebreather mask over her face. She pulled the mask down and tried again. “Carina, is everyone okay?”
Carina, finally hearing her wife, looked up to see Maya holding the mask away from her face. “Maya, the mask stays on,” she instructed Maya. When her wife obliged, replacing the mask, Carina continued, “No deaths. Some kids and teachers with smoke inhalation and a firefighter that collapsed.” Carina paused, taking a deep breath. “And you. You almost died, Maya. Again. We need to talk about that.”
“What’s there to talk about? It’s not my fault that I-” Maya’s tone shifted to defensive before she stopped her sentence short, realizing what Carina might want to discuss. “I had a duty to help!”
“You also had a duty to stop when the LAFD told you not to continue without protection. I know that you know that stopping wouldn’t have lost you your job. I know this wasn’t about your job, but it still felt like you were choosing being a firefighter over me. I had to watch you run into a burning building, and I couldn’t do anything about it.” Carina stood up from her seat.
“Carina, I’m sorry. I-”
“I know, and I know that you are working on this with Diane. I love you, bambina, but I need you to ask yourself if you really value your life.” Carina steps toward the door. “I’m going to get some coffee,” she says as she opens the door.
Moments after Carina stepped out, Dr. Abbasi entered the room. She glanced over at Maya. “Hi, Maya. I’m glad to see you’re awake. I’m Dr. Abbasi, the critical care attending assigned to your care. Do you have any questions for me right now?”
“How long do I have to be here?” Maya coughed out the question, following it with a round of loud, wet coughing.
Dr. Abbasi quickly grabbed a paper cup from across the room and handed it to Maya. “Spit,” she instructed. After Maya lifted the mask and spit a glob of phlegm into the cup, Dr. Abbasi placed the cup on the table next to Maya. “You don’t want to keep swallowing that stuff; it’ll keep you sick. We want to keep you here overnight for observation and continued treatment. I can discharge you once you stop spitting up, your blood gases are good, and you can maintain oxygenation on room air.” She paused to allow Maya to digest this information. “Is your wife around? I’d like to speak with her.”
“Carina went to get a cup of coffee,” Maya responded, not showing her anxiety about when Carina would return.
“Okay. I’ll check back in later.” Dr. Abbasi smiled and walked over to the other side of the curtain. She was pleasantly surprised to see another patient awake. “Hi, Evan. I’m glad to see you’re awake. I’m Dr. Abbasi, the critical care attending assigned to your care. Do you have any questions for me right now?”
“Uh, no, I don’t think so.”
“Okay. Let me know if something comes up later,” Dr. Abbasi responded. “Mr. Diaz, can I talk to you in the hallway?” She walked out of the room, taking Eddie with her.
Maya stared up at the ceiling. “Evan, huh?”
“Yeah, though my friends call me Buck,” Buck replied.
“Why Buck?”
“It’s short for my last name, Buckley. What about you?”
“Maya. I overheard that you had died again. What’s the story there?” Maya reached for the cup and started to cough again.
“I, uh, was struck by lightning a couple months back. According to Eddie, I was dead for 3 minutes and 17 seconds. I was in a coma for a while, and I had this really weird dream. I didn’t get any of that this time around.”
“Struck by lightning? How’d that happen?”
“I’m a firefighter, and there was this apartment fire during this big thunderstorm, and I was on the ladder, and I, uh, don’t remember too much after that.” Buck let out a small nervous laugh. “So, uh, what do you do?” he asked, attempting to change the subject.
“I’m also a firefighter, but I work in Seattle.”
“Seattle. What brings you to the great city of Los Angeles?”
“Brush fire response training. I was going to spend the next few days here as a mini vacation with my wife, but I think I ruined that.”
“How did you ruin it?”
“I ran into a burning building and almost died. I got distracted by the kids needing help and wasn’t thinking. It was stupid, and I-”
“I, uh, I get it,” Buck interrupted her. “I’ve ignored evacuation orders to save civilians on more than one occasion. I’m the first one to volunteer for dangerous rescues. I am constantly putting myself in danger and not thinking twice about it, or even once for that matter. I, uh, understand the guilt, too. Maddie, Cap, Eddie, and Chris have feared for my life more than is healthy. It’s a lot.”
“It is,” Maya agreed. “Why do you keep doing it anyway?”
“I can’t stop,” Buck admitted. “It’s just a, uh, part of who I am.”
“What do you mean?”
“I was born to be a bone marrow donor for my older brother. It didn’t work, and he died before I could even register that he existed. My parents were so beside themselves with grief that Maddie and I were pushed to the side. Even though I didn’t know what had happened at the time, they blamed me for his death. I acted out hoping that they would notice me, but they just got mad at me when I got hurt. I never really grew out of it, but I have slowed down.”
“How did you figure all that out?”
“Therapy. Lots of therapy.”
“Oh.”
“Not the answer you had hoped for?”
“No. I have worked so hard to get back to a good place with my wife, to rebuild her trust in me, and I just acted like none of that ever happened. How I acted today is how Maya from a year ago would have acted. I’m not supposed to be that Maya anymore.” Maya paused to take a deep breath. “How do I stop?” She coughed another glob of phlegm into the cup.
“I’m not sure I can help you with that one. I’ve died twice this year.”
“Right. How do I fix this?”
“I’m not the right person to answer that question either, but I know someone that might be.”
Just outside the room, Carina sat in one of the two chairs conveniently placed next to the door, clutching a white to-go cup of lukewarm hospital coffee. Though her eyes were glazed over and her vision blurred, she was determined to not start sobbing.
A few feet away, Eddie finished his conversation with Dr. Abbasi. As he headed back to the room, he noticed Carina’s worried expression. He recognized her as the companion to Buck’s roommate and took a seat next to her. “You look like you could use someone to talk to,” he said. Realizing he hadn’t introduced himself, he added, “I’m Eddie Diaz. My friend in there is Buck.”
Carina turned slightly to face Eddie with her bleary eyes. “You’re a firefighter, right? You were at the school fire earlier today?”
Eddie nodded in response.
Carina continued, sounding a little unsure, “I’m, um, Dr. Carina DeLuca. My wife in there is Maya. And I’m fine.”
“Okay,” Eddie replied with a hint of skepticism in his voice. He looked away from Carina to stare down the hallway, but he didn’t get out of his seat.
After a slightly awkward 30 seconds, Carina broke the silence. “Your friend in there, Buck? Is he going to be okay?”
“Physically, he’s going to be fine. Emotionally, I can’t really say. It’s the second time he’s died on the job, and he still wants to keep going.”
“What do you mean, ‘the second time’?” Carina took a sip of her watered-down coffee.
“Buck was struck by lightning a few months ago. His heart stopped for 3 minutes and 17 seconds. He came back with new math superpowers and a whole ‘life is a gift’ philosophy. He had just really started to process what it meant to have died. He was finally starting to understand that he is not expendable. Then he died again through no fault of his own.”
“I don’t know how to respond to that.”
“That’s okay. How is Maya?”
“I don’t know,” Carina admitted. “The smoke inhalation injury was pretty bad, but the attending that admitted her said that she’d make a full recovery with proper care and rest. I’m not even sure I can convince her to stay in the hospital once she’s off Oxygen, not to mention resting when she gets discharged. Asking Maya to take a break is like asking a baby to stop being cute: she doesn’t know how to.”
“So Maya is the off-duty firefighter that ran back in after Cap told her not to?”
Carina sighed. “Yeah.”
“From what I’ve heard, she sounds a lot like Evan. A couple of years ago, he sued the city because he was benched while on blood thinners-”
“Let’s not give Maya any ideas,” Carina interrupted.
“Until the lightning strike, he lived for the danger. Even after his attitude changed, he still didn’t know how to stop trying to save everyone but himself,” Eddie finished.
“You could say that last part about Maya,” Carina responded, beginning to fidget with her wedding ring. “I want to help her, but I don’t know how. She almost killed herself after shutting me out for months. She wouldn’t let me in, so the only thing I could do was commit her, and that almost destroyed our relationship. I don’t think I can take it happening again. I love her too much for that.”
“You can’t always wait for them to let you in. Sometimes, you have to kick the door down yourself. It’s what Buck did for me, literally.”
“Did that help?”
“It saved my life, my career, and my walls.” Eddie’s phone buzzed in his pocket, letting him know that it was almost time to pick Chris up from school. “I need to go pick my son up from school. I should probably check in with Buck before I go. Are you coming back in?”
“I think I need I little bit more time. Can you tell Maya that I went to grab something to eat?” Carina asked Eddie as he got up from his chair.
“I’ll let her know,” Eddie told her. He opened the door and walked into the room.
Inside, Eddie turned to Maya first. “Maya, your wife wanted me to let you know that she went to get something to eat.”
“You saw her?” Maya asked timidly.
“We ran into each other in the hallway?” Eddie said.
“Is that Eddie over there?” Buck asked from the other side of the curtain.
“Yeah. I need to-”
“Great,” Buck cut Eddie off. “Can you do something about this curtain? Maya and I have been talking. It turns out we have a lot in common.”
“I’ve heard.”
“You have? What did Carina say about me?” Maya followed up.
“She loves you,” Eddie replied. He pushed the curtain back so that it bunched up against the wall, allowing Maya and Buck to see each other. Eddie then turned his attention to Buck, turning his head to lock eyes with Buck. “Buck, Carla’s off today, so I need to go get Christopher from school. We’re going to pick up some dinner, and then come back here. Please don’t let him sweet talk you into doing his math homework again.”
Buck smiled softly as if to silently giggle at Eddie’s last statement. “Does the team know I’m awake?”
“Yes. I told them after my conversation with Dr. Abbasi. Shift doesn’t end for a couple of hours, but they’ll stop by later. Maddie is on her way.”
“Thanks, Eddie.”
----------
Maddie arrived at the hospital about 20 minutes later. As she walked into the hospital room, she ignored Maya and headed directly for Buck’s bed. “Oh, Evan, I am so glad you’re okay.” She placed her black purse on the floor as she took a seat on the edge of the foot of Buck’s hospital bed. Maddie looked her brother in the eye and rested a reassuring hand on his leg. “Eddie told me what happened. That must be a lot to process. How are you feeling?”
“I’m fine, Maddie. Really. You don’t need to worry about me.”
“I’ve been worrying about you since you were little. It’s not something I can just turn off.”
“You’ve mentioned that before.”
“Well, it’s true.”
“I know that you are here to check on me, but I was hoping that you could help me with something else.” Buck glanced over at Maya. “Maya, this is my sister, Maddie. Maddie, this is Maya Bishop, an Olympic gold medalist-turned-firefighter from Seattle.”
Maddie looked across the room to find Maya. “What did you play?”
“I ran the women’s 10,000-meter in 2012.”
Maddie just nodded lightly in response. She looked down at her hands and twiddled her thumbs, hoping that someone else would fill the silence.
“You don’t seem too impressed. I was the US’s first gold medal in women’s athletics that summer. It was a big deal,” Maya said, sarcastically offended.
“I didn’t really watch,” Maddie admitted. “Doug said that running wasn’t a sport worth watching, and I didn’t care to pay attention while I was at work.”
Noticing his sister’s distress, Buck was eager to change the subject. “So Maddie, Maya here needs some advice. She and I have strikingly similar patterns in behavior, and she’s going through a bit of a rough patch with her wife. I figured that between you raising me and you building back your relationship with Chimney, you might be able to offer some guidance.”
Maya looked up at Maddie with a hopeful-lost-puppy look in her eyes. “I keep messing everything up. I’m worried that she can’t love me anymore. It’s like I’ve stabbed her in the heart, and the moment it starts to heal, I twist the knife.” Maya pulled the mask off her face to wipe away the tears that had started to fall onto her cheeks.
Maddie got up from Buck’s bed and crossed the room to take a seat at the foot of Maya’s bed. “Hey. We are not going there right now.” Maddie paused to get up to grab Maya a tissue. “Can you tell me what happened?”
“Where should I start?” Maya asked half-jokingly.
“Whenever you think is good.”
“Okay.” Maya let out a shaky breath, which was followed by a coughing fit and another glob of phlegm into her cup. “After I was demoted, I started working out really hard and pushing everyone away. It got to the point where I almost died, but instead of accepting the help I needed, I kicked Carina out. It’s taken us months to rebuild our relationship. I wanted to take Carina on a short vacation, but I ran into a burning building and almost died again. Now I’m stuck here, and Carina seems pretty upset. How do I fix this?”
“Have you talked to your wife?”
“Not since she walked out after I woke up.”
“Eddie did,” Buck added, “but he would only say that Carina said that she loved Maya.”
“Why did you run into a burning building?” Maddie asked.
“LAFD was five minutes out and the kids needed help.”
“Then why is your wife mad at you?”
“Because I ran back in after LAFD showed up and told me to stop.”
Maddie shifted her weight around, trying to piece together what may have happened. She remembered Bobby sounding quite angry about a civilian on the radio during the school fire earlier that day. She tried to put that out of her mind as she followed up, “Why did you do that?”
“I don’t know,” Maya sobbed, tucking her hands under the elastic coming from the side of her mask to cover her eyes. “I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know.” Maya started to cough again, a wet hacking interrupting her sobs. The monitor over her head flashed as her Oxygen saturation values slowly fluctuated downward.
Maddie, noting the cup on Maya’s bedside table, grabbed the cup and brought it to Maya’s chin. She slowly lifted the mask off of Maya’s face and allowed Maya to cough a smoky glob of phlegm into the cup. “Maya, it’s okay to not know, but I do need you to slow your breathing a bit. Would you like me to walk you through some deep breaths?”
“I got it,” Maya replied as she attempted to take some long breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth.
“Good,” Maddie said to a now-calmer Maya. “Can you tell me why you think your wife can’t love you anymore?”
“I haven’t been able to move past it. I’m supposed to be a better Maya, but I can still hear his voice in my head. ‘No one loves a failure. People want a winner.’ I want to stop scaring my wife, but I don’t know how. All I know is ‘eyes forward.’ How can Carina love me if I’m failing at this?” Silent tears streamed down Maya’s face.
“I don’t think you’re failing,” Buck chimed in.
“Why not?”
“Because it’s hard. Getting the things our parents taught us about ourselves out of our heads is hard. I would know.”
“He’s right,” Maddie agreed. “I still hear the voices of my parents criticizing me in my head, and I’ve been working on that for a long time.
You said that you wanted to stop scaring your wife. What did you mean by that?”
“I do these stupid things, and I get hurt, and then I push everyone away.”
“That is something I can help with,” Maddie responded. “The first step to getting your wife’s trust back is taking your recovery seriously, but I think you already know that.” She turned her soft face from Maya to glare at her brother. “You just probably weren’t ready to say it to yourself.” Maddie thought about adding, ‘That goes for you too, Buck,’ but her glare said it for her.
Having a much clearer mind, a sudden wave of slight panic and embarrassment came over Maya. “No, no, no,” she said. “I did not just have a breakdown on a total stranger again.”
“It’s okay,” Maddie reassured her. “I work at 911 dispatch. I speak to total strangers having the worst day of their lives all day. I just normally can’t see their faces.”
Maya stared down at her hands. “Thank you, Buck. Thank you, Maddie. Thank you.”
15 minutes later, Carina’s voice punctuated a soft knock at the door. “Maya, I’m coming in.”
As Carina entered the room, Maya began to speak. “Carina, I’m sorry. What I did was not okay. I didn’t mean to scare you, and-”
“Maya, please stop talking. I know you’re sorry, but I need to say this now, or I’m worried that it’ll never get said.” Carina took a deep breath. “I love you, but I cannot have you keeping me in the dark. I am worried about you, and I don’t know how to help. I want to trust that you are getting better, but then you pull things like this, and I don’t know if I should believe you.”
“How can I-”
“Maya, let me finish. I would like to sit down with you and Diane.”
“You want to go to couples’ therapy?”
“No. I want to have a real conversation with you and Diane about how I can best support you. Is that something we can do?” Carina walked over to Maya’s bed, tentatively taking a seat just past her wife’s feet.
“Yeah. That can be arranged.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Carina spotted a stack of papers on the bedside table that hadn’t been there before. “What’s that?” she asked, gesturing toward the stack of papers.
“Yes. That,” Maya said excitedly. “That is a copy of my medical records release form to give to Grey-Sloan when we get home. They already filed one here.” She cracked a shy smile. “I also filled Andy and the Battalion Chief in on what happened. I have a couple days of desk duty lined up for when I’m scheduled to go back to work.”
“Wow. Maya, I’m impressed.” Carina grabbed the release packet off the table and paged through the fully-completed form. She didn’t recognize the witness signature on the last page. “Who is this?”
“It’s Maddie, Buck sister.” Maya pointed to Maddie, who was quietly speaking with Buck on the other side of the room.
Carina glanced across the room, not having registered that the curtain had been pulled back when she walked in the room. “Thank you, Maddie.”
Maddie perked up and looked over at Carina. “You don’t have to thank me. This was all your wife’s idea.”
“It was?” Carina asked, shifting her gaze back to her wife.
“Yeah.” Maya let out a proud giggle and locked eyes with her wife. “What’s that look for?”
“I want to kiss you so bad right now, but your mouth definitely still tastes like smoke.”
Maya reached for Carina’s head and leaned in to press their foreheads together. “How’s this instead?”
“You still smell like smoke,” Carina remarked.
Buck looked at Maya and Carina longingly. “You two seem so good for each other. I wish I had someone who looked out for me and understood me like that.”
Maya slowly pulled away from Carina. “What about your husband?” she asked innocently.
“My what?”
“Your husband. What was his name? Eddie?”
“Eddie’s not my husband,” Buck replied, realizing that while that was certainly true in a legal sense, he wasn’t so sure if he acted like it wasn’t true at all.
“You look at him like he’s your husband. He looks at you like you’re his husband. You talk about him like he’s your husband. You might not be married, but he is your husband.” Maya squeezed Carina’s hand.
“How did you know? You and Carina?”
“When something bad happens, the first person I look for is Carina,” Maya offered.
Buck considered what person he would go to in that situation. He started a running tally. Eddie: 1
“When I have a bad day, all I want is to be in Maya’s arms,” Carina added.
Eddie: 2
“I’d be a completely different person if it weren’t for Carina.”
Eddie: 3
“If I could call anyone in the world from the hospital, I’d call Maya.”
Eddie: 4
“I think I get the point,” Buck responded before Maya could add another item to the list. “I could say all of those things about Eddie. What, uh, what now?”
“You tell him,” Maya instructed.
“H-how?”
Maddie pulled out her phone and sent a quick text to Eddie. “You have fifteen minutes to figure that out,” she informed Buck. “He and Christopher will be here shortly.”
----------
Eddie got back to the hospital with Chris about an hour after he left. Chris rushed over to Buck and gave him a big hug. “Buck, you have to stop dying on me,” Chris demanded.
“I’m trying my best,” Buck half-joked back.
“It’s time for homework,” Eddie told Chris, placing his backpack down next to the chair on the far side of Buck’s bed. He looked up at Buck to say, “Maddie’s text said you needed to tell me something?”
“Eddie, these past few months I’ve been looking for someone that really sees me. In doing so, I overlooked the one person in my life that does: you. I am not afraid to be my full, true self around you. Eddie-”
“Just kiss him already,” Chris interjected.
“What did you just say, bud?” Eddie asked, slightly taken aback by Chris’s demand.
“Oh come on!” Chris continued. “The two of you have been in love for years. How come I noticed but you didn’t, Dad?”
“I agree with the kid,” Maya added.
“Me too,” Carina agreed. “The way you talked about Buck in the hallway is the same way I talk about Maya.”
“I wasn’t exactly expecting to make a speech right now, so I don’t have much to say. Evan, you-”
“Just kiss him and get it over with!”
“Fine.”
#911 fox#station 19#maya bishop#evan buck buckley#buddie#marina#carina deluca#eddie díaz#wee woo show crossovers
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“Never Satisfied” being discontinued feels like the end of an era for me.
Specifically web comics with privately hosted sites. All the webcomics I read at that time of its production are all “dead” now: Monster Pop by Maya Kern, Monsterkind by Enenkay/Taylor C, Cucumber Quest by GiGi, Paranatural by Zack, and I thought Sakana was gonna be but it came back after a 3 year hiatus. (There are more, but I can’t remember their names. There is one where I distinctly remember the alt text on a page saying how another artist “lovingly redlined Avery’s ass”) A lot of newer comics are hosted on apps, like webtoons, now. Not that there is anything wrong with that. I think it’s convenient that they are all here together, but I do miss how incredibly personalized and charming browser experience each comic had. It’s just kinda odd to feel the passage of time and how things change in this way
Majority of the comic artists I follow have shifted away from comics and instead have taken to writing novels because they hell of a lot easier. Which is great for them and I definitely encourage doing whatever it takes for your mental and physical health. I think having the ability to write novels are an incredible skill and feat in of itself! However, I can’t help but feel a bit dejected. Because of my reading disability and vision impairments, I can’t enjoy these stories when they are converted from a comic into written form. It’s difficult for me to read walls of text, and even harder for me to retain it. Even typing this is difficult. I just have to pray that I didn’t make any typos and that this shit is actually coherent! And since these books are all very small productions, none of them are on audible so I can’t even listen to it. Sure, there is text to talk, but BOY is it hard for me to retain anything I’ve heard when the Stephen Hawking synthesizer is reading to me. Maybe it’s the cadence? Regardless, a lot of the comics I listed above have an ending written out that I will never be able to know of because I suck at reading. Hell! I’d be more willing to “tough it out” and struggle for long periods of time, but reading fatigues me something fierce. I got maybe 5 minutes max before I have go lay down. I don’t even get to retain what I read either! I just get exhausted, and I’m useless for the rest of the day.
For some reason, comics don’t seem to do that. I have absolutely no idea why. It is the only written media I can consume with ease. All I know is that I hate it, and it fucking sucks to be this way. If I know how I could fix it, I would. But so far, nothing seems to do anything,
I know it’s selfish of me, but I am curious if artists would be more inclined to finish a project if there was better system for comic artists. Of the comic artists I have followed years ago and still continue to make comics usually have a partner that they work with. Perhaps if there could be some kind of business platform where there was a team of artists working on an idea, like what they do with animations. ….However, considering how underpaid and overworked artists in general are, I’m sure the only improvement would be the rate of production. I know that is especially bad in other countries. They overwork and underpay their employees, which doesn’t really help resolve burnout, the whole issue I’m trying to address. Not that I have any right to say anything on the matter. My stupid ass can’t make more than 6 pages of a webcomic before hitting an art block.
Unrelated, but something I think is kinda funny is how many artists and comic artists I follow that have come out as trans within the last couple of years. In hindsight, it is probably why I liked and connected to their work so much.
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