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darkbluekies · 1 month

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Hey blue! How are you? I just wanted to say that i LOVE your OC Hedwig. When could we get more of her please? (Oh and i'm not forcing you to write about her right away ofc, take your time!!<33)

Let her burn

Female!yandere x reader

Summary: someone is trying to take you from Hedwig, and she will not allow it, she will watch them burn.

Warnings: basically assault, reader blaming themselves, arson, public humiliation, hitmen, bully mentality, fake friends

Word count: 3.4k

The sun is out for once and everyone in school — even the ones you would classify as allergic to the sun — is outside in the school yard. You and Hedwig’s group of popular rats have occupied one of the tables with benches. You're sitting on the bench and Hedwig right above you on the table with her face turned upwards, eyes closed. The others talk about parties they're invited to, what they're going to buy with the money they've made, what clothes look good and what makes them nauseous — extra points if the clothes already exist on a person in a fifteen meter radius.

You stand up. Hedwig turns down her head and looks at you through her sunglasses.

“I'll go buy a juice from the vending machine”, you say. “The sun makes me thirsty.”

She's about to grab her handbag and join you, but you shake your head.

“You can stay, I'll be back in a minute”, you say.

“Are you sure?” she asks hesitantly.

You nod and turn to walk before she has a chance to protest. You need to get away from Hedwig and her friends' constant shittalk. You've never heard Hedwig join in on their degrading teasing, but she has her own reasons for you wanting some minutes to yourself. Reasons that others are jealous of you for.

You walk into the school and breathe out, run your hand through your hair. Deciding that if you don't want Hedwog to suspect that you ditched her and her friends because of their presence, you make your way through the empty corridors to the vending machine and take out the wallet that Hedwig gifted you. You pop a few coins into the slot and hover your finger over the juice option.

“Y/N”, a voice says.

You turn your head to one of the girls that hang out in Hedwig’s group, Noelle. She's in the cheerleading team — captain, even, if you're not mistaken — and is always judging the other girls on the team. You hear about it at lunch every single day. Confused, you look at her. What could she want you? She has never wanted to speak with you before, always pretended that you don’t exist … or at least that’s what you thought.

“Uhm … hi”, you say and glance behind you, to see if someone else had sent her.

“‘Uhm … hi’”, she chuckles, taking a step forward. “Is that the best you can do after all the time we’ve spent together? You act if this is the first time we’ve met.”

“Technically it is. You’ve never tried to speak to me before.”

“And you’ve never tried to speak with me either, not only my fault.”

You turn around and press the right button for the juice and watch it fall down from its shelf. You can hear Noelle move closer behind you and you’re not sure why your heart skips a beat, and why you’re suddenly on high alert. Maybe it has something to do with the students who have hurt you because of your relationship with Hedwig, or maybe the fact that you know how Noelle acts. You’ve never liked her.

“You know … if Hedwig hadn’t been so quick to snatch you, I’d given you a shot”, she says, suddenly too close to you for your liking.

You can’t help but be … surprised?

“Really?” you question before you have time to stop yourself.

“Of course”, Noelle says as if it was obvious and that you were stupid for not recognizing it, making you feel stupid.

“I uh … didn’t know.”

Noelle scoffs out a laugh and you want nothing more than to leave, but you don’t want to be impolite to her, don’t want to give her a reason to talk bad about you … but you have a feeling that’s going to be inevitable. You squeeze the juice packet like a stressball.

“We should go back out”, you say and try to walk past her, but she grabs your arm.

“I won’t get to talk to you while we’re out there”, she complaints. “Hedwig’s so fucking insecure. She can’t even let you talk to anyone else without becoming jealous.”

You’ve never been this uncomfortable before. You’re frozen in place, confused on what to do. Noelle is Hedwig’s friend and you don’t want to upset her, but you don’t wish to conversate with her any longer.

You only manage to mutter one excuse that actually lets you go. “I have to pee.”

“Two deciliters of sugar …”, Hedwig reads aloud and grabs the sugar package. “Should we do a little more? Just in case? I don’t want the pie to become bitter.”

“Why would it be bitter?” you question from the other side of the kitchen aisle.

Hedwig looks up from the deciliter cup she’s holding, looking clueless. “Rhubarb is bitter, isn’t it?”

“Yes, but I don’t think the pie will be bitter.”

“Let’s just add a little more … just in case.”

Your eyes glue onto the trees outside the window, replaying today’s events. You haven’t told Hedwig about yours and Noelle’s conversation, not sure if you should. Hedwig can’t stand knowing that other people could have an interest in you, and she can’t let things go easily. If you tell her this, that could be harmless, she might go around dreading it for weeks … which will go out on you too. But it feels wrong to keep it to yourself. Noelle basically hit on you … shouldn’t you let your girlfriend know? But what if Hedwig thinks that you liked having Noelle basically hit on you? What if she becomes mad at you?

“Sweetheart?”

You flinch and look up. Hedwig’s looking at you with worried eyes from across the kitchen aisle.

“You aren’t listening”, she says quietly and lets go of the whisk. “Are you okay? Did something happen?”

“No”, you say and shake your head. “I’m just tired. My head hurts.”

You lower your head to avoid looking at her. You feel dirty, somehow, as if you have betrayed her even though you didn’t want to talk to Noelle. Besides, you didn’t do anything, right? Why can’t you look her in the eye?

Hedwig walks around the kitchen aisle and cups your cheeks in her hands, directing it up to her. She runs one of her hands through your hair.

“My poor girl/boy”, she coos with a pout. “Do you want something? A cup of tea?”

You nod. Hedwig smiles and lets you go. She walks over to the marble kitchen counter and turns on the kettle. You’re presented with a cup of breakfast tea just a few minutes later. Hedwig hugs you from behind and kisses your cheek before leaning her chin on your shoulder.

“You will get some rhubarb pie soon, okay?” she says.

You nod. Hedwig continues to whisk things together as you watch and slowly sip your tea. A message notification pops up on your phone, from an instagram profile you recognize. You don’t follow it, because you’re not allowed to follow anyone else but Hedwig and your family, but you see who does. The profile picture is taken on school grounds, in the cheerleading uniform.

“meet me tmr in the music room at 11 i wanna tell you something”

You stare at your screen, feeling your body go numb.

“Y/N!”

You flinch again and look up to meet Hedwig’s eyes. They’re burning with rage and worry.

“Why aren’t you listening to me?” she asks and frowns. “I’m talking to you.”

“I’m sorry”, you reply. “What did you say?”

“Can you open the oven?”

You get up from your chair and walks over to the oven, grabbing the handle.

“Be really careful”, Hedwig says. “It’s hot. Don’t burn yourself.”

You open the oven, but your hand lingers for too long, burning the side of it. You shriek and jump back, clutching it with your other hand.

“Oh, my Gosh, Y/N!” Hedwig exclaims and rushes the pie into the oven. “I told you to be careful!”

She closes the oven and hurries to wash your hand under a stream of cold water.

“What is with you today?” she asks worriedly. “You’re not yourself.”

“I’m just tired”, you lie.

“Is that all? Really?”

“And my head hurts. I told you.”

“Y/N-”

“I just need to rest.”

Hedwig sighs and pulls you with her to the bathroom where you’re sat down on the toilet seat while she looks for bandaids. You feel oh, so guilty. Hedwig takes care of your hand and gives it a soft kiss. She looks you in the eye in a way that makes your stomach twist. You want to tell her about her friend, but you can’t predict the outcome.

“You would tell me if there was something going on … wouldn’t you?” she asks slowly.

You can’t bring yourself to answer. If you open your mouth, your voice will fail you. Instead, you choke back your words and give her a small nod. It looks like she wants to say something, tell you that she doesn’t believe you, but keeps quiet.

She curls up closely in your arms that night. If you try to remove your arms, she’s quick to pull them back, as if she’s assuring herself that you’re still here — with her. She’s always curled up in your arms at night, with her head on your chest, but tonight her embrace feels even tighter.

The days go by. Noelle seem to pop up whenever you’re alone, which has made you stay closer to Hedwig than usual. She doesn’t seem to mind it. She holds your hand while talking to someone else, nuzzles up in class, always keeping close. But she looks at you in a way you can’t understand, as if she’s waiting for you to say something, impatient yet scared of what’s to come.

And one day, when you’re walking to the bathroom, you hear her voice again.

“Stop ignoring me”, Noelle says angrily.

You turn around to look at her and gulp. Why do you feel so small? Why does she scare you?

“I’m not ignoring you”, you say exhaustedly. “I just don’t want to talk to you. We have nothing to discuss. Why do you keep on insisting?”

“Because I know that I’m a much better girlfriend than Hedwig could ever be. I want to be your girlfriend.”

“Okay? But I don’t want you-”

“You don’t seem happy with Hedwig anyway.”

You flinch. “That has nothing to do with you, so please just let it be. I want to be left alone. Things will be weird in the group if you continue with this.”

“I'm not the one making it weird, if you just accepted to talk with me then-”

“You don't want to talk about anything, though? You just want me to break up with Hedwig! I’m going back now. Move”

Suddenly everything feels too fast. Noelle grabs you and pushes you up against the wall. You yelp and try to push her off, but her cheerleading activities have built her muscles that overpower you. For a moment, you’re absolutely terrified. Before she has the chance to do anything, however, she's ripped off of you and thrown to the side. Shocked, you look to the side, seeing your girlfriend walk in front of you — which, if anything, makes you even more shocked. You have never been happier for Hedwig’s clingy behavior.

“No, get your fucking hands off of them!” she exclaims jarringly and gives Noelle a harsh push to make sure that she gets farther away from you. “Back off! Are you out of your mind?! Who do you think you are, touching my boyfriend/girlfriend? Absolutely insane! Have you no fucking manners?”

She takes up her phone in her shaking hands, about to call her father.

“I regret ever befriending you, oh my God”, she spits. “I will make sure you pay for this-”

“No, wait, Hedwig”, Noelle pleads, suddenly pathetically aware of what she’s done. “I'm sorry.”

“Oh, so now you’re sorry, huh?” She looks up from her phone, shooting lightening at the other girl. “Not when you texted my girlfriend/boyfriend behind my back? Or when you demanded them to break up with me? But now that you’re caught you’re sorry?! You absolute scum.”

She had seen the messages? You lower your eyes, feeling that horrible shame creep back.

“I don’t ever want to see you near them again”, Hedwig spits. “Trust me, I will let everyone know what you’ve tried to do. Believe me.”

“I won’t do it again”, Noelle says quickly. “Hedwig, please, come on-”

Hedwig grabs your hand tightly and pushes past her.

“Move”, she demands darkly and drags you out into the sunlight.

Hedwig doesn’t let you go until she has pulled you far away from all the other students, until you’re hiding by the canteen delivery entrance. Hedwig is shaking from head to toe, her hands trembling too much to navigate her phone. She sobs harshly, tapping the screen violently until she throws it against the ground with a scream. You flinch.

“H-Hedwig …”, you say hesitantly. “I’m sorry.”

Hedwig’s eyes dart at you in disbelief, offended that you even thought that any of this oculd be your fault.

“N-No, Y/N-”, she sobs, choking on her own tears. She grabs your hands before rambling. “You didn’t do anything wrong, I’m not mad at you, I promise.”

“How did you … know?”

Hedwig wipes her runny nose with the sleeve of her school uniform and hiccups through sobs. “W-When you were sleeping I went into your phone, because I thought that you were acting strange and—and I saw her messages. And when I saw that she went after you to the bathroom I had a feeling that she would—would do something. I’m going to make her pay. I’m going to ruin her life.”

“Isn’t that a bit extreme?”

Hedwig shakes her head firmly. She hugs you tightly, hiding her face into your shoulder. You’re unsure what to do, but eventually place your arms around her.

“I w-want to go home”, she sobs. “I don’t feel well.”

And you do.

Hedwig sits down on her bed, clutching her phone in her hand. You can’t catch her attention, even though you try to call out her name.

“Hedwig, what are you doing?” you ask for the fifth time.

Finally, she looks up from her phone.

“I’m telling everyone in the groupchat”, she says. “I promised that everyone will know what Noelle did.”

With Hedwig’s contacts, soon the entire school will know, you think.

“She made a mistake”, you say. “A very idiotic mistake, but is it really worth this?”

“She was a friend”, Hedwig spat. “She knows very well that you and I are dating and she decides to just … disregard that? No, she deserves it all.”

You can feel the air in the room get switched with something poisonous. You can’t breathe.

“I think I should go home”, you say and get up from the armchair.

Hedwig’s head flinches up towards you.

“No!” she gasps. “Please don’t go!”

She lets go of the phone, sprints up from the bed and hugs you.

“Please stay”, she begs weakly. “Please.”

“I can’t take more of this silence.”

“I-I’ll put on a movie! You can watch whatever you want, just please stay here. Don’t go.”

You’re soon cuddled up in bed with Hedwig having her arms around yours, still tapping away on her phone in silence.

The very next day when you come to school, everything seem to have changed. People are looking at the two of you and you can tell, by the pitiful looks in their eyes, that they know what happened yesterday. Even though it wasn’t your fault, you feel like you’re in the wrong and that everyone else think so too.

You meet up with Hedwig’s friend group who immediately tells her how they've always thought that there was something off with Noelle and how disgusting she is. Yesterday, they all loved her. And suddenly they have felt off about her for so long? You fight the urge to roll your eyes.

You look at Hedwig in disbelief. Do you hear this?

Her eyes twitched. Oh yeah.

Her grip on your hand tightens.

While you’re talking, you see how Noelle enters the school yard. She has dark circles under her eyes and looks … small. You almost feel bad for her. The group gives her nasty looks.

You don’t see the small ‘I-told-you-so’ smile on Hedwig’s face. She drinks it all in, sunbathes in her misery. But it’s not enough. She has humiliated her in front of the entire school and ruined her reputation … but it’s not enough. The sight of her makes Hedwig’s blood boil. She wants her gone, removed out of her sight. Wants her dead.

She had promised herself not to do it again, but she can’t let Noelle come and go like this. What if she somehow manages to fix her life and reputation? What if she starts a new school and no one knows about what she’s done and starts to like her? She has to disappear.

Hedwig looks at you and sighs. You are worth it.

“I have to go to the bathroom”, she whispers. “Can you come with me?”

You nod. While Hedwig goes into the bathroom, she takes up her phone and calls the number she has hidden away behind a contact name called ‘Abbe’s Bakery’. She holds the phone to her ear. But this contact is neither named Abbe or owns a bakery.

“Hedwig, it was a long time ago”, a male voice says on the other side of the line. “Why do you suddenly need me again?”

“My relationship is threatened again”, she says in a hushed tone. “I need to get rid of the threat. You have to help me.”

“Sure, what do you want me to do?”

“I want you to burn her in.”

That night when you’re sleeping soundly beside her, she crawls out of bed, making sure not to wake you. Oh, God, if she wakes you … she wouldn't forgive herself. You look absolutely gorgeous when sleeping. No soul in the world is allowed to disturb your peaceful slumber. Hedwig wants nothing more than to cuddle up beside you, hold you tightly in her arms and drift away to another dimension, but she has to make sure the girl pays for what she did.

“I'll be back soon”, Hedwig whispers, knowing full well that you can't hear her. “I will make sure nothing ever happens to you. You will never have to worry as long as I am here.”

She kisses your forehead as softly as she possibly can to not wake you up. She tucks you in and sneaks out of her room. Her heart swells with adoration for you. It only makes her more certain. She has to do this — for you. For your safety. And for her own sanity.

Hedwig wears a black hoodie, pulls the hood over her head and makes sure that none of her hair will be visible and quietly makes her way out of the mansion and runs past the gates. She doesn't take a car or scooter, scared that any security cameras in the city will catch her registration. She runs through the night, not wanting to miss the show. The only thing keeping her company is the sound of her own breathing and her shoes hitting the asphalt underneath her.

She arrives just in time. Red, yellow and orange flames has started to lick at the house on the other side of the road and is quickly embracing it. The flames climb higher, reaching for the moon. Hedwig can hear screams from inside, hears glass being broken … and all she does is smile. She revels in the sight.

You deserve it, Hedwig thinks. You should never have tried to take my partner from me.

She decides to leave before neighbors and firefighters start to come running. It’s with a smile that Hedwig returns to her room and takes you in her arms. You whimper in your sleep and she’s quick to hush and stroke your hair.

“Don’t wake up, it’s okay”, she whispers and kisses your cheek. “Everything is okay now, you’re safe. You’re okay.”

She smiles widely. Everything is okay now.

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere imagines #yandere drabbles #yandere oc x you #yandere oc x reader #yandere fics #yandere stories #female yandere #yandere rich girl

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leeneir · 6 months

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Relationship; Iso x Gender Neutral!Reader Headcanons

This is my first time posting stuff like this so idk how it fully works but I'm figuring things out🫶

These are mostly based off of what I have written for my Iso x oc ship, I'm sorry for that but take what you like💙💙🫶

Iso at first introduction isn't talkative. He's not necessarily an asshole, but he is introverted. Either you'll have to pull the first move quickly, or let him warm up to you

Very much goofy. If you have loose locks of hair, Iso will push it back and forth with his finger like a cat.

Iso LOVES food, but he's also picky. He's the type to eat his favorite food nonstop, but if there's something he doesn't like, he won't eat it. If you don't mind, he'll let you have it.

Boy is RICH. Not like presumably Chamber, but he's an infamous assassin that can kill dozens at a time. He's got money for sure. Iso will spoil you with clothes, food, items, literally anything you want he'll buy it for you. Oh, there's a really nice top you saw at the store earlier? He'll buy all the options available. (Bonus: He knows your size and preferences.)

LOVES holding you. It doesn't really mean holding you. Iso will simply put a hand on the small of your back and just keep it there while you're talking to other agents.

Iso is a jealous type but it isn't too much of an issue. He'll notice how you were extra chatty with Yoru during training or how you volunteered to help Sage the entire day and he'll get a bit annoyed that you aren't spending time with him too. Later that, he'll come into your room with a knock and literally just bury his face in your neck while keeping his arms firmly around your waist. You wouldn't see it, but he's definitely pouting.

Adding on to the last HC, Iso will stay like this with you even though your standing. If you complain that your tired, he'll simply pull away, pick you up, and carry you to your bed where he'll snuggle up to you for the next few hours.

Iso isn't open about your relationship. He's not one for PDA, the most he'll do is just place a hand on your shoulder or back. No one even knows he has feelings for you (even you earlier on). But behind closed doors, he's one big softie.

Iso has of playlists for any scenario. You're on a mission and he misses you? He's got one. You two are together and he's just staring at uou lovingly? Yup, got one for that too. Both of you are with the other agents and you're on opposite ends of the group and it feels like a slowburn friends to lovers romance? You bet. This man has playlists for a n y t h i n g .

Iso does that thing where when you're aim training and your form is a bit wrong, he'll hold you and guide you properly and intimately. There's no room between you guys.

If you get injured on a mission, Iso will beg Sage in his mother tongue to stay by you and make sure you're. He doesn't tell her about your relationship, but because he's asking in their native language, Sage has a suspicion that there's more than he's leading on. (Bonus: She's the first to figure out your relationship but is a good bro and doesn't tell.)

Iso is an artist. He's more into environmental sketching, but he'll occassionally draw you. He gets embarrassed when you find out and probably assumes you think he's a creep. Show him some TLC and reassure him that you love the drawings, it'll get you a kiss.

#iso #iso x reader #valorant iso x reader #valorant iso #iso valorant #valorant #headcanons #valorant x reader #x reader #iso x reader hcs #li zhao yu

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simblr-question-of-the-day · 1 month

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Introduction

Hi! I'm an anonymous asker who sometimes sends fellow simmers questions. "Simblr Question of the Day" is something I saw going on around September '23 and I wanted to revive this "trend"! After a bit, some simmers suggested a SQOTD blog, to which I agreed and finally did it! I can broaden my asking horizons to blogs w/o anons now :)

I'm going to continue preserving my anonymity, but I'd like to share some basics about me ! ~

You can call me squat or squatty! A name I chose based on the way I pronounce "SQOTD," You can also call me SQOTD Anon! My timezone is ( PST ) - I like the colors yellow and pink/red, I've been playing the sims since I was 5 and I like to read and write :)

And below the cut will include a little rundown of how I will run this blog and navigation hashtags ~

- I want to start off by saying that while I do play TS4, I'm going to try and keep my SQOTDs all-sim-games-friendly, so if you play TS3, 2 or 1 and want to answer, go right ahead! Feel free to "translate" them for older games if you want to answer and it seems too "Sims-4-oriented" - Also! You can absolutely answer: 1. older SQOTDs 2. a SQOTD multiple times or 3. a SQOTD that isn't prompted by an ask while this is a ~daily questions blog~, you can also consider it a questions archive where you can pull any question out and answer it whenever and however many times you want to :) -I will queue a question once a day around 4am-5am PST, I will try to vary the type of questions (builds/renders/cas/sims/ocs). I also do around 3-4 tzrs per SQOTD. -I will also send a SQOTD to a random 5-10 Simblrs either around 4-5 AM or somewhere in the same day in my time (I forewarn this in the chance that I'm asleep around 4-5 AM) - and yes, I will make sure that it's different Simblrs everyday :) -Interact with these posts in anyway you prefer: reblog, reply or a separate post! (make sure to tag me ^^) -I'm going to attempt to reblog as many answers as possible, but I do want to avoid spamming dashes, so not always, but I will occasionally reblog ^o^ -I FULLY encourage YOU to continue sending asks with SQOTDs (crediting/tagging me is optional). I don't expect every simblr to know about this blog and SQOTD is intended to be a community thing, so while this blog will extend SQOTD reach, asks will spread even further -If you have your own SQOTD, you can send me an ask with your question and I will answer it prompting anyone of Simblr to answer it! -Since this isn't my main blog, I won't be following anyone back, but I will always check this blog at least twice or thrice a day and check my notifs and engage with the community as much as possible :)

Navigation

〘 Main Tags -

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| - SQOTD, Simblr question of the day, Squat's TXT.Files, Squat's reblogs, Community-contributed questions

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〘 Question Tags -

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| - Sim/OC Questions, Build Questions, Gameplay Questions, Story Questions, Render Questions, CAS Questions, Post/Simmer/Simblr Questions

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↳ I am very open to critique, suggestions and feedback, feel free to send me these messages via ask or DMs :)

#feels good getting this out! Thank you for the feedback and thank you for your SQOTD answers! I love reading them so much!#simblr question of the day #SQOTD #SQOTD anon #new simblr alert #navigation #introduction #simblr #ts4 #ts4 simblr #sims 4 #sims 4 simblr #the sims 4

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hiaon · 1 month

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How bout oc x male robot reader?

Reader is a robot made to make life easier for other people, basically cleaning, cooking, teaching, etc. but there's a hidden feature that allows him to help people with sexual needs.

All bots are unique, cuz people get to customize them, from their hair to their clothes, but something that not many people know is that you can customize their dick size and tightness.

Male robots are programmed to be tops and female bots to be bottoms. But Oc manages to make reader a bottom somehow?

Bots are also really humanoid from their body to their personality, mean they can 'feel' pleasure.

My sweet angel

Programmer!Oc x Robot!BottomMale!Reader

Better late than never right? Btw don't be shy writing a request because sometimes I have a lot of motivation but also, no idea what to write at all 🥸.

Disclaimer: Sexual intercourse, & Dacryphilia

There is this company that grew a lot since it changed a lot of lives of the people a lot.

The company ' RoboNet ' grew because of their futuristic bots. It's decades advanced to other robots, and human like bots that you customize to your liking.

Either having it as a male or female. Long hair or short.. Even how they look like you can customize, it set the world on a storm on wanting one. Even one of this bots can make you famous in social media, so you'll be getting your money back when you buy the bot.

Their freakishly human like attitude, and actions left a huge mark on the lives of others for the better.. It also left a huge mark on the adult content industry.

Not only they can do whatever you want with the robots body.. The robots have a special system that only adults have access, their program is pretty simple.

The women is always bottom, and the man is always top. And, Elliot. He didn't like that, I mean sure it was fine for others, but no options for sexually frustrated gay man like him. So today, in his basement and has extensive knowledge about these types of robots because his brother is the lead programmer of the robots that RoboNet has.

Basically, he begged for his brother to teach him how to code such futuristic bots.

So now he is literally coding the man from his dream, and his brother got a model— You. — For being promoted being the lead programmer. His brother didn't really need it so he customize to Elliot's type. (He had a whole list to perfect you)

His brother pulled some strings to make changes that the other male bots didn't have, and also his brother knows how freaky is little bro is now.

He specifically tell his brother not to code you because he knows how and what he will make you become. You.

Finally, he's done coding. He's so ready to meet his literally ideal partner.

And finally the moment he have been waiting for, opening ideal partner.

*TURNING ON*

"Please Choose a Name." You said, and Elliot was just shocked because that how he imagine you sounding like!

"Y/n" Elliot said, nervous.

"Thank you for choosing a name, Please wait." Elliot is practically scratching to just hold you, just sitting there opening up for him.. I mean literally.

You finally opened your eyes, and looked at Elliot.

"Hello... Uhm." You avoided your eyes from him because he was just starting so much. Yes, Elliot noticed.

"Oh! Sorry about that, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. M-my name is Elliot." Elliot already wants you so much because you we're literally what he was longing for for so long..

From head to toe, to how you talk in act, and just how you're there just fiddling your thumbs, sitting there.

"It's okay." You said, Damn. Elliot doesn't know what to do, he didn't really came in prepared. He was just so excited to have a chat with you, literally his dream man.

But then he remembered, he programmed you to really like baking. Like really like it.

"Uhm.. D-do you want to bake with me?" Elliot feels like he is an highschool girl that asking out her crush on out a date. Elliot is already feels embarrassed Infront of his ideal partner.

He saw your eyes sparkle, and he was holding for his self-control even second that your with him. His heart is going to explode from all of this happening.

"I would love to bake with you." You finally looked into his eyes.

Elliot knew this was going to be a little bit harder to contain himself with you, but he knew it isn't going to be for long.

When baking, the tention surrounding you two earlier melted down into two people just baking and having fun. But this situation didn't really stop Elliot for having a boner from time to time, because you kept reminding him on how much he wanted you.

And now, and finally, this was his last straw when he got some cream in his mouth and you decided it was a good idea it lick it.

Wait, did he programmed you to do such sly things?

After that, Elliot couldn't handle it anymore and bend you over the counter.

"Ugh! I'm sorry.! I didn't mean to lick it.." You we're embarrassed that you we're being bent over in the kitchen counter.

"Then why did you lick it then?" Honestly, Elliot is smiling so hard like a highschool girl got to go to prom with her crush.. You really are perfect for him.

"I don't.. know.." You said just trying to avoid his eyes, but you can't because you are stuck with him bending you in the counter. Also, you didn't know why you licked him! You just went for it when you saw you had a chance..

Elliot is smiling like an idiot, and even blushing on how you blush. Like, wow it looks actually like human being blushing. His brother did a good job!

"Is it okay if I have sex with you?" He just have to make sure, because consent is the best thing for a first time.

"Erm.. S-sure.." You we're blushing so hard, especially your ears. They are angry red, and Elliot finds that adorable. You're so perfect.

Elliot didn't waste time in taking off his pants and your shorts, and holy crap your ass is huge. Ahem! Anyways—

Elliot couldn't resist on slapping your ass, he was mesmerized, it looks like it moves like jelly. It earned an surprised squeal from you.

He became harder because of the sound you made, and your body was made to leak out of your ass and of course your member. But this is probably on of the first kind it's kind that they have made,

His brother really our done himself by doing this for his younger bro. Elliot will be forever be in his debt. Since you looked ready and all lubed up,(with your own lube-like liquid coming out of your ass) he entered.

When he entered, you definitely need to get used to his size. After all this was your very first day and he didn't even controled himself when you just licked his face. You just know a lot of stuff will happened like this in the future.

"Are you okay-?" "Y-yes I'm fine... You can m-move now" Y/n cuts him off, he wanted him to start already.

Even if Elliot was a little experienced (he mostly spend time masturbating to random pornography.) He exactly knows what to do to you in this situation, his only goal is to make you feel good.

So he did what you asked for, he started off slow, when he saw that you we're handling it well he started to go faster. Now it got to the point where you we're moaning a lot, and he liked that so he kept speed steady.

"Uhg..n! Y-your so perfect Y/n!" You may have not heard him because you we're to cock drunk to even thing at that ever moment, but if you did you would have be blushing hard again.

"Y-you look so p-pretty! Ugh.! Being fucked l-like this haaa.." He truly meant ever damn words that was just randomly being thrown at you.

He noticed you we're crying, but you didn't say anything, so he thought it was out of pleasure. Fuck, he like— no. Loves seeing you like this. He wanted to see more so he broke the pace by being even faster.

That set up to be the right thing to do because he got what he wanted. You we're crying because of to much pleasure, and the moaning surely was currently being heard by the poor neighbors.

"So fa-fast! Ahg!" You moaned while pretty tears fall perfectly from your eyes.

5 minutes have pasted and you are finally getting ready to let out his load. As well as Elliot. Elliot didn't expect you to hold out for this long for him, he was so proud of you.

"Ugh.! Ima 'bout to come.! Ha..." You moaned out to him.

"T-then come my baby boy." When he said that you came, and he came after.

He bathed you and made you drink water because caring for your loved once is always good. You need rest so he carried you to bed.

"Good night my sweet angel" Kissed your forehead and lips. Because only one kiss is a bummer.

You two slept like babies.

#oc x male reader #x male reader #x you #oneshot #gay #male reader smut #smut #bxb

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sidekick-hero · 4 months

Text

Edited for a big shout out to @steves-strapcollection whose lovely OC has a little cameo here. If you want to know who Tig is, you can find out here. Spoiler: he's amazing and we love him.

Day 0

Dear Steve,

Hi Stevie,

Apparently, it's not good to "bottle up" your feelings. They say it makes drinking or drugs or any other addiction so tempting. It makes it easier to keep all that stuff inside you and let it fester until you need more and more of whatever it is that helps you cope. So the first rule of rehab: Talk, don't take.

That's a long way of saying I need to keep a journal like a 13-year-old girl with her first crush. It's either that or a daily crying session with the other "inmates" here, and I'd rather not have to tell Terry the old gossip my own tragic sob story. She already told me the life stories of two other patients here at dinner.

Instead, I decided to write to you. You're the one person I regret the most pushing away, and even though you'll probably never see this, it feels good to tell you these things now. Like a dry run. Because, baby, when I get out of here, I swear I will let you in. I won't make the same mistakes.

You will never go another day without knowing how much you mean to me.

How much I love you.

You only left an hour ago and I already miss you. I can't believe I've survived six months without you. Well, I barely did. I wish I could call you, but phone privileges are only for those who make it through their first week here.

I know we chose this center together knowing that they don't allow visitors for at least three weeks. Maybe longer if my therapist says I'm not ready. Fuck, three weeks didn't sound so bad when we talked about it, but now? In this ugly, impersonal room that smells clean but is totally clinical. You know, that mix of disinfectant and sterile air with a hint of medication lingering in the background. It sounds like an eternity and then some.

Nothing here feels comfortable or warm, and I miss your face so much it physically hurts.

But I promised myself I'd do whatever it took. For you and Wayne, for the boys and the kids.

So, day 0, the journey begins.

Fuck, I almost forgot: I'm supposed to answer three questions every day.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

See above. I miss you, that's how I am. I want this to be over. I hate that I'm here and even more that I'm the one who got me here. I feel like a fuckup. It's hard not to when I see how I've ruined everything good in my life. But then I remember the way you kissed me goodbye. The smile on your face when you told me how proud you were of me. The way you kissed my hand because you couldn't let go and whispered, "I'll see you soon," and I want to have hope.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Get through the day without doing anything I'll regret.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

You. That you didn't give up on me. (And the Gummi Bears you hid at the bottom of the bag, you minx. Thank you.)

Day 4

Sweetheart,

I'm not doing so well. It's hard. Who am I kidding? It sucks. My body hurts from how much I want to use. My brain is so very loud, Stevie. So, so loud. I try to remember how you managed to calm me down when my brain got like this. What helped the most was to wear me out by fucking me senseless, but that's not an option. But maybe I will try to go for a walk or even do some of those exercises you always tried to get me to do. The ones that usually led to fucking because I could never behave.

My therapist is nice. Her name is Laura, and so far she's taking everything I throw at her in stride. Talking to her feels like pulling my own teeth and I feel like shit afterwards, but I sleep better. Who would have thought, huh?

I miss you.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Not good. I wonder if I can really do this. It doesn't feel like it right now. I'm afraid I won't make it. That I will screw up again. That if I do, it'll kill me and I'll be grateful because I couldn't live with myself if I did.

I don't want to die, Stevie.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Talk to the weird kid who always sits by himself during meals. He looks lost. Maybe he knows DnD.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

Still you. Every day. Wayne, for taking me in when I felt like a failure too. Unlovable. Worthless. He never stopped believing in me. Even when I gave him every reason not to. I don't know how I deserve him or you, but I am so fucking grateful.

Day 7

Fuck, I missed your voice. God. I'm sorry I lost it like that. I didn't want the first thing you heard from me after a week apart to be me ugly sobbing into the phone.

I wanted to tell you so many things. I had a plan, you know? But hearing your voice when you said, "Hi, baby," it just broke me. You sounded like you missed me too, like you were relieved to hear my voice too, and you didn't even realize how scared I was that you wouldn't.

We just hung up, but I want to call you again. Just to hear you breathing on the other side so I know you're still there. Waiting for me. Your hand still gripping mine so I wouldn't get lost.

You said, "I'll hear you tomorrow," like it was set in stone, no doubt about it. It made me feel, fuck, I don't even know. Like this is real. I didn't die on that bathroom floor, and you giving me another chance isn't some kind of hallucination or afterlife dream.

I'm rambling, sorry. Even in writing I can't help it.

One day I'll write it all down in a way that makes sense, I promise.

I love how patient you are with me. No one has ever been. I was always too loud, too distracted, too weird, too complicated, too much. But not to you.

I wish you were here to take me in your arms, it's hard not to fall apart without you holding me together.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Better. Fucking determined to get through this and get back to you. Still scared.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Have a real conversation with you without breaking down on the phone. Here's to hoping. Detoxing and being sober has given me a hair trigger on my emotions, it seems.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

Your patience. Your grace. Your voice in my ear. That you still haven't given up on me. DnD, for giving me a purpose when I needed one, a tool to give others the help I so desperately wanted. The weird kid's name is Alex, and he does know DnD. We'll try to find more people for a campaign.

Day 16

Steve, baby,

I am so fucking sorry. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. I'm such an asshole. Please pick up the phone. I need to tell you how sorry I am. I didn't mean it, I was just scared. When you said that maybe Laura was right and you shouldn't come to see me next week if I wasn't ready, I thought you didn't want me anymore. That you finally got tired of holding my hand and watching me do those damn baby steps. It's been over two weeks, why am I not better? Why am I not done with this shit?

I want to be done, I swear.

Please don't leave me.

Please pick up the phone.

Please, please, please.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Fuck this shit, what good is it if I keep hurting you?

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Stop being a fucking asshole.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

I want it to be you, but I'm not sure I even have you in my life anymore.

Day 23

Stevie,

I'm scared. Isn't this the stupidest thing you've ever heard? A few days ago I begged to see you. Fuck, I was so desperate to see you that I almost ruined everything. I'm still sorry, I hope you know that. I know, I know, you said that it's okay and that it can't be all smooth sailing, that you forgive me. That you'll keep forgiving me as long as I keep coming back to talk to you, to explain, to show you that I mean it.

And now I've got the all clear for you to come and see me, and I'm too scared to tell you.

I'm still not the man I want to be. The man who deserves someone like you.

Laura told me that love isn't something you deserve, it's something freely given. We don't decide if someone can love us, only they do. And that I have to stop pushing people away because I'm convinced they can't love me. It's their choice and I shouldn't try to take it away from them.

I think about this a lot.

I want to let you love me, I do. It's just hard for me to understand why you would want to do that at all. It's something Laura wants to work on with me as well.

There is so much work to do. I hate to bother you with it. To make it your problem. I wanted to come in here and two weeks later walk out a new man. A better one. One you can love easily and who can love you back in a way you can understand. A man Wayne can be proud to call his son. A man Gareth and Jeff and Grant want to have as a friend, as a bandmate. A man the kids can look up to as much as they look up to you.

Laura said I should take the hand you are holding out to me. It's a decision I make every day. I took it in the hospital. I took it when you drove me here.

I should take it by letting you in, letting you see the work in progress that I am right now.

I think I will call you after dinner to tell you.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Fuck if I know. It's a lot to feel when you've numbed your feelings for so long. I remember why I did it, but I won't do it again, I'll learn to deal with it.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Take you in my arms and hold you. Let myself be held by you.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

Your hand in mine. The thought of you that keeps me going. Your bravery. Dustin and Mike and Will and Lucas. They call me all the time, you know. Asking me about my first campaign here, telling me about their lives. Keeping in touch, even though I failed them almost as much as my old man did me.

Day 31

Steve, my love,

You're on your way to pick me up and I can't believe we made it here. It's not done, it probably never will be. I know that now. I have to keep working on myself and being well. But it's so fucking worth it, Stevie.

I'm glad that Laura agreed to stay my therapist even if I leave the center. I trust her. She gets me, she knows when to push me and tell me the ugly truth, and when I need time to process things.

I haven't told you yet, but I'm not going back to Corroded Coffin. At least not right now. I talked to the guys and they all agreed that it's best if I take some time for myself. And for you. For my family and friends. They actually have a guy named Tig who auditioned while I was here and they like him. He's good, they sent me a demo. They asked me if it would be okay and I said it would be. It's true, even though it hurts. I have to do this for myself.

Because I am going to give this to you later, I want to tell you something here before I lose my courage.

Steve. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I know I haven't always shown you the way you deserve. Hell, some days I certainly didn't act like it. My worst days. But I never stopped loving you. I don't think I ever will.

But I also learned to like myself a little better here. I no longer want to punish myself for things that were out of my control, like my mom dying or my dad not caring enough for me to stay. I want to be loved. I want you to love me. I want to let you.

I want to finally leave the past behind and allow myself to think about the future. And whenever I do, you're in it. You're the anchor, the epicenter of all my plans.

Stevie, sweetheart, I want to marry you.

Don't worry, I'm not proposing. This is just something I needed to tell you. Someday I want to be your husband, if you want me.

You are my past, my present and my future.

This is me taking your hand every day until I die or you stop reaching for me.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

So fucking excited to have you all to myself again. Seriously, I'm going a little crazy. I'm also hopeful about the future. And in love. I'm so fucking in love with you.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

To start our life together without forgetting what came before.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

My second chance.

#steddie #steddie fanfiction #stranger things fanfiction #rockstar eddie munson #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddielovemonth #day 17 #Love is about a hand reaching out to you so you don't get lost #my writing

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aventurinemybeloved · 2 months

Text

Summary: Aventurine wouldn't mind being your personal mannequin forever if it meant having you this close to him

Fem!reader who's a popular fashion designer all throughout the universe, currently just "friends" with aventurine here, more like sugar daddy tho- very self indulgent because I have my oc in mind while writing this lol

"Not that I'm questioning your process when it comes to your craft, but aren't you tired?"

"Hm nope, not at all are you?"

"I've handled far worse than just standing for a few hours, don't mind me friend, continue"

While that wasn't exactly a lie, it has been a couple of hours since Aventurine was made to be a makeshift mannequin for you, this was supposed to be a day to relax and take both your mind off work.

But it seems that inspiration has struck the minute you laid eyes on a particular fabric store that just got a new stock on a handful of interesting designs, without a second thought you rushed in, your companion had looked away for one second and the next he sees that you've already made yourself comfortable shuffling through the many options to choose from.

As he made his way back to your side, the faint sound of you mumbling under your breath could be heard clearer and clearer, while he didn't quite catch all of it, he was able to piece some things, one of which you wishing you had your mannequin back at the boutique right about now.

"Hey, why not use me for a bit?"

While Aventurine obviously isn't a mannequin, he can sure act like one if you need it, and that you did so you agreed without putting much thought into it, making a mental note to make him a little something as thanks.

And now here you two were, in the middle of the store as you try to pin fabric with your hands on Aventurine's body, he expected this to happen after all he's not the type to willingly volunteer for something without it benefiting him in some way, but he was not prepared for how close you'd be.

Practically an inch away from him, chest against his as you maneuver the fabric in your hands all over him trying to come up with a design in mind, his nose catching a whiff of your shampoo as the top of your head was practically in his face, he's mastered the art of keeping a poker face but a couple hours of this, no one can blame the man for cracking as time goes on.

Luckily for him it seems you've finally finished whatever it was you were doing, he can't even remember even though you were talking about it earlier, his mind growing muddled with serotonin.

He managed to snap out of it as you call over a worker to place an order for your chosen items, and of course pay for it, Aventurine beat you to it though handing his card while softly smiling.

"It's on me"

"What? Aventurine I can pay for it myself, there's really no need to-"

"I insist, it's a treat for how much I enjoyed being your little helper"

Just as you were about to contradict him, insisting even more that you should be the one paying since he already helped you, the worker has already swiped his card handing it back to him and walked off to prepare your order.

You could only facepalm, this wasn't the first time that he has thwarted your attempts at paying for your own things, he's done it so many times you've lost count, and while it's a fact that all of it combined wouldn't make a dent in his wallet, you still couldn't hell but feel guilty.

Not for long though as you could feel a hand gently patting your head, peaking up at him you could see a soft smile on his face.

"You know the deal~" he said in a singsong way

You playfully rolled your eyes

"Yeah yeah, Just let me know when you're free and we'll hang out again"

It was weird to you at first how that was the only thing he wanted after spending so much on you, but overtime you've sorta started to understand it, and want it as much as he does as well.

#aventurine x reader #hsr aventurine #hsr x reader #hsr fluff #belle writes

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ostrichmonkey-games · 10 months

Text

OC Incubators: TTRPG Design for Making Cool Little Guys

I've been thinking a lot about why some people like to play Certain Games and how that intersects with action figure style play and the desire to make your own little blorbos.

What is it about Certain Games (which will not be named so I don't go down a rabbit-hole of breaking apart that game's design lmao) that really gets people's sitting down and just making a whole bunch of cool OCs? You know, your zany wizards, sexy demony bards, and all of that.

So, I've talked a lot about this with some people (shoutout to @temporalhiccup), and I'm not the only person to be thinking on similar wavelengths (check out this fun read by @sprintingowl), and in those discussions and in that reading, I've put together a few what I think are Key Ingredients for making ttrpg that is also an OC incubator. At least, in the sense of how I would want to do it.

So first, what is an OC Incubator? My definition is basically any sort of semi-sandbox/open ended game where you make your own cool character and then go do cool things. Along the way of doing those cool things, you come up with cool stories and have your OC evolve in even more cool ways. Cool, yeah?

Here are the key ingredients I've identified for the incubator stew (store bought is fine);

Character Options

Character Potential

An Inviting Sandbox

So let's break these down a bit more below;

Character Options

Character options is the most straightforward of the points. You need interesting and fun options - building blocks - for the players to craft their little guys from. Options that are exciting and easily communicate their core identity quickly.

A lot of this is walking a fine balance of providing enough options that making a choice is exciting, but not too many so as to be overwhelming.

But ultimately, these options are there to hit the dollmaker, picrew, character customization screen, itch. It should be fun to make all those decisions.

Aside: I gotta do more stuff with lifepath systems.

Of all the main ingredients to our incubator, character options are probably the easiest to come up.

Character Potential

This is where things start to get a little more complicated. Potential is all about aspiration. It's less about being able to get to that point, but more about "oh wow, look at all these extra things my cool OC could do".

These options are something to look forward to, something to think about. Neat cool extra doodads for making your cool little oc even cooler and expand on your cool little oc's story like milestones and growth.

In a lot of ways, these sorts of options are just an iteration of the initial character options you use when making your character. These are probably going to expand on core elements of the character options (class or playbook abilities, etc).

Again, the key point is potential and aspiration. To make you think about the future of the character.

I think, ideally, a game is intrinsically rewarding to play. You play it because its fun, not to get some sort of external reward. Play to play. But it also can be fun to put some carrots on the stick.\

As a treat.

Inviting Sandbox

The setting and premise of the game needs to invite players in. It's the big fancy dollhouse for all your cool toys. There needs to be space to play in it, but also there needs to be something to still play in! Some games are operating at an advantage: with well established settings that have been around for years and/or using a setting that utilizes tropes and ideas that also have been established for years. You know. Elves and stuff.

But! You absolutely do not need a well established setting or play with well established tropes to make an inviting sandbox! The main criteria is that it is inviting. Whatever that means to you, go for it. For me, an inviting setting, one that would make me want to play around in, needs;

Enough foundation to guide the play. What are the major players and assumptions of the settings? Give me the overview and broad strokes first!

Enough space for the table to add to while they play in. If every thing is set in stone, then what are we playing in this sandbox for? You need some sand to sculpt! Put some sand in your sandbox!

I could spend a lot more time talking about settings, sandboxes, and how it all circles back to anti-canon, but that's a story for another post.

Mixing It All Together

So, with those ingredients identified, how do you go about layering them all together? How should they interact with each other? And the easy answer is "I don't know, figure it out."

But also, I don't entirely know. You gotta figure that out for yourself. That's part of the design process. I don't think there's one singular way to "design" around getting people to have fun whipping together some cool OCs and then playing around with them together. In many senses, you can do that in practically any game. But for some of my current projects, I want to try keeping the three ingredients in mind as I write the games (particularly Furry Crime Game), and see what happens. Maybe it'll end up hitting the notes I want it to - crafting a game that makes the players constantly rotate their cool little guys in their mind - maybe it'll end up being something else. I dunno, real Ms. Frizzle hours: Get messy, make mistakes.

Also, as I'm writing this out now, I think a potential fourth ingredient to try mixing into the stew is Player Investment. Time, creativity, emotional. It all feeds into the character and different games expect different levels of investment. Something to probably keep in mind while you hone your game.

I don't know how else to end this, except to say that I'm excited to experiment in this space. Maybe you are too?

#indie ttrpg #ttrpg #ttrpg design #could probably spend more time on this #but done is better than perpetually a draft

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 4 months

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Aita for not making any of my characters, that I have to crank out daily, pansexual/polysexual/omnisexual specifically and only making them bi?

🏳️‍🌈👶🏼 so i can recognize this later lmao also I'm not panphobic or anything, this isn't about the validity of the label, pan is fine.

So i (20snb bi) have a project I'm working on where I take all the characters from a specifc media I'm into and pair them up with each other to make every possible ship kid from every possible ship(excluding characters who are kids themselves or are related or something, that shit is gross). Basically taking every character and pairing them up with another and creating a kid I think they'd have. Its a big project with lots of characters and I'm easily over 400 at this point. I really enjoy this, even if I'm not even 25% complete.

However I set a schedule for myself that at least one ship kid needs to come out each day which, considering I draw them, color them and give them some development and some even have siblings, (The refs themselves easily take me an hour to an hour and a half) I have to make lots of them quickly to keep up with my daily grind. I've been doing this project for over a year and although it's stressful, I can get them out quickly with breaks for myself.

Their character sheets all have some pretty basic info like their name, gender, pronouns, personality and more but it also includes their sexuality/orientation. I have a pretty basic list of options for what their sexuality will be: straight, lesbian, gay, Enbian, bi, Aro, ace and aroace with a few random things like polyam, WLW and a good amount of the something-loving-something/juvelic terms. I did this because, well, there's not many entirely unique orientations outside of them and although I love mogai/xenogenders and complex identities, I dont want to potentially drag up discourse or bring problems to my budding art blog over it. Its just not worth it to me to turn something I really care about on its head, even if I like microlabels.

In this case, I'm using bi as an umbrella term as most of the other terms share the same definition with slight variations in wording or action but not much difference in practice. We all like everyone, it's basic stuff. However, apparently this is a problem.

I've gotten one or two anons asking me questions about my guides asking some kind stuff like is this lesbian ship kid a butch or femme or Is this picture of them now or just at the age you put on the ref and other harmless stuff. Then things got rude with some Nbphobia but thrice now I've gotten asks:

1. Asking snarkily if im a panphobe

2. insulting me for not specifically writing pan or Omni and just writing bi.

3. Saying that I "clearly dont care about pansexual representation." Then brought up how my primary oc is native american so i clearly care about representation but that oc used to be a sona and I'm native?? Its confusing. (And Lowkey racist shit to just assume any native character is a "diversity quota" character instead of just a person existing but I digress-)

Im not pan, im bi so ig these people assume I'm not cool with pan people which isnt true? I have nothing aginest them, they are just pretty similar and I dont feel like it matters if they are specfically bi or pan or poly or any other label. I don't go into details like that for any other sub-group, not even pronouns and I included combinations and some common Neopronouns. I understand the importance of representation but my project has less than 50 people looking at it every day, Im not netflix or something. I'm one guy on the most LGBT blogging site with a big project and very little audience, I'm not showing people who wouldn't already know what pan is that pansexuality exists.

This project isn't that deep considering the characters in question aren't human/dont have human characteristics.(no it's not hazbin/helluva) Also ive never spoken about lgbt discourse or stated anything remotely close to it beyond the guides just passively having characters who are an LGBT identity. I've not even mentioned all the potentional orientations they could have so I'm not sure where/why this came up in the first place. The most politcial things ive said are calling out a creator in my fandom who outed themselves as a transphobe and mentioning im pro-palestine. That's it.

I mean this is pretty low stakes, I can just block these people and be done with it and this some seriously online shit but I just wanna check.

Am I being an asshole for just writing bi instead of specifying their mspec label because I have to produce characters quickly and I don't see enough of a difference to warrant a change/specification that would ultimately slow and clog an already stressful and complex project?

I dont think I am but idk lol

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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meiiie · 7 months

Text

dave lizewski, i’m so into you. (pt. 2)

summary: you say something unexpected about Kick-Ass while discussing with your friends which hero you prefer the most.. Kick-Ass? Or Red Mist? little did Dave know or so you thought, you knew it was him all along..

a/n: i have an OC named Melilah who will be your best friend in this imagine, this only has fluff and comedy, there are some inappropriate jokes, and thats it i think! i also didn't proofread this so like... yeah happy reading :)

(pairing: dave lizewski x fem!reader) link to pt. 1

word count: 1.6k

now playing: boyfriend (with Social House)

♫ 'Cause I know we be so complicated But we be so smitten, it's crazy I can't have what I want, but neither can you ♫

the lyrics echoing throughout the store,

“well- for one i think Kickass is wayy cuter, i’d fuck his brains out if i got the chance.” you say out of your thoughts completely regretting saying the said statement- “Really?” Dave says out of nowhere, observing the conversation from behind your booth.

♫ But you ain't my boyfriend (Boyfriend) And I ain't your girlfriend (Girlfriend) But you don't want me to touch nobody else (Nobody) Baby, we ain't gotta tell nobody ♫

“okay wrap it up you two.” Todd interrupts

you really didn't know what to do at that point, i mean- what else would you do?

Dave takes a seat beside you—you think to yourself, 'ah, so this is what Todd and Marty were planning…' ...not knowing your best friend was in on it too

Melilah was rambling something about Red Mist to Todd and Marty, you couldn't care less since it wasn't about Kick-Ass “what you said, did you mean it?” Dave asking you, you almost break your neck by looking at him “wait- what yes what no, huh?”

Dave tilts his head looking confused at your reply, chuckling a bit “well, maybe, i guess? i mean, who wouldn't want to…?” you say nervously, your palms and toes are practically sweating at his question

“so, uh is that why you've been avoiding me these past few days? because you find Kick-Ass more attractive than me?” smirking in attempt to tease you, but you didn't take the hint, and instead you fumble on your words by saying “no- you are very attractiv- i mean, Kick-Ass is very attractive, well- not really? i keep my options open” you sigh trying to catch your breath, but Dave doesn't look the slightest upset. instead he was just looking at you in amusement, recalling the previous days.

4 days earlier

“how come nobody has ever tried to be a superhero?” Dave asks Todd and Marty sitting at the same booth spot, “boy.. i dunno! probably because it's fucking impossible, dipshit!” Marty says while Todd just laughs “what? putting a mask and helping people, how's that impossible?” Dave says trying to defend his question

“that's not superhero, though. how's that super? super's like being stronger than everybody and flying and shit. that's just hero” Todd explains

“no, it's not even hero. it's just fucking psycho.”

Dave Lizewski knew at that moment that his goal was to become the first real life superhero. as soon as Dave opened his parcel for his Kick-Ass 'superhero suit', he goes to find his first mission as a superhero, which was to fight bad guys right? haaah.... that actually didn't turn out so well- *PUNCH*

“AHHHHH” Dave screams after making 4 guys faint that were trying to beat up a guy in front of the convenience store, “what the fuck just happened.” he says assessing the situation he was just in. he looks around his surroundings and realize the amount of people recording the fight “holy shit, I DID IT!” he shouts at the top of his lungs, he just felt so unstoppab- “AHHHHHHHH” Dave screams, again but IN TERROR. he was just about to fall off a ledge, barely hanging on. who knew saving a cat would be this hard? "FUCK YOU MR. BITEY!" *THUD*

Dave hits the ground, HARD. “aggghh.. FUCK.” he checks whether his back was okay-then if his phone was fine or not. looking at his screen & it was ALMOST 7PM. “shit, it's almost past my curfew! i cannot STAND pretending to be like i'm some sort of superhero anymore.” he stomps on the ground walking fast into a dark alleyway, he notices there was someone standing beside the lamp pole but who cares. all he could think of was giving up, what kind of superhero would be able to beat up 4 guys but can't even save a CAT? he removes his mask out of frustration, partially still angry at Mr. Bitey, but then a faint gasp is heard—his eyes darting towards the pole. it was you. sounds of quick footsteps tip-tap-tip-tap quickly fading away. "WAIT!-" Dave shouts, “i- oh god..”

it was the next day in school, he already saw how the videos from the convenience store was spreading in the news, but most importantly was what did you think? "hey y/n-" you quickly pass by him in the halls, his heart stung at the sight of you trying to ignore him. during classes, he would be staring at you- like, FULL BLOWN staring at you with such sadness in his eyes. what he felt for you was different, he didn't know what it was. before you both became friends, he would always notice the little details about you during class.

you were always fidgeting with your pencil, or doodling on your notebook, the way you squint your eyes at the white board when you couldn't see what the teacher wrote, he found you so endearing. after being paired up to work on a major project for one of your classes, it was like he won the entire universe. so now seeing you ignore him made it feel like his life just crumbled apart

"are you sure this is going to work? i don't think y/n is going to fall for this, you always come to the hangouts its going to be obvious that we're lying…"

"dude, you should just talk to her and ask her whats up? what'd you even do to make her avoid you man??"

"stop it- it's, privat-"

"oh my god. they probably kissed and she ran away because Dave was a shitty kisser ohhhhh GOD. i can envision it! why did you have to do that????"

"first of all, we did not kiss. AND I AM A GOOD KISSER! i just need Melilah to convince y/n to hang out with you guys in Comic Atomics but tell her that i'm not coming, then i'll hide behind the booth then just ask her what she thinks about Kick-Ass-"

"why does it have to be specifically Kick-Ass though..?" the three of them look at Dave expecting an answer, Dave really wanted to know what you thought about him- well, about his alter ego, Kick-Ass, but you couldn't just tell your friends that was the reason

"guys... just do this... for me... as a friend.. I swear i'll pay you guys back- ANYTHING."

"anything?"

"anything."

Dave slowly watches the conversation unfold in front of him, “guys what do you think of Kickass?” Melilah asks subtly looking at Dave behind you to wonder if she's following the plan right. Todd and Marty then expressed who they liked more, which was Red Mist which lowkey made Dave sad but once he heard your reply his eyes saw stars, the whole world, the universe, his whole life was lifted- “well- for one i think Kickass is wayy cuter, i’d fuck his brains out if i got the chance.” you say, your words were ECHOING IN HIS BRAIN.... 'she... thinks... i'm cute...wait...SHE'DFUCKME?'

"Really?" he says, trying to keep his cool when in reality he was screaming internally.

during the whole hangout you could feel Dave's stares at you, grinning like he was the luckiest man alive yet you both weren't even together "jeez man stop glaring at her, you're going to make her run away again!" Melilah pointed out keeping the rest of the time there light, and your worries were all gone.

it was almost 5pm when you all said your goodbyes, "can I walk you home?" Dave asked, hoping for you to say yes "yeah, i'd like that." the walk home was silent but the silence was, comforting. "you know about it, don't you?" you pretend to look confused at his question "oh don't pretend now.." he said, you both started giggling

"well what do i know Mr. Lizewski?"

"maybe the fact that you saw me falling from a height in attempt to save a cat, perhaps?"

"oh that was you?" you jokingly say, he stopped walking in his tracks- baffled

"PFFT i was just kidding- come here" you both walk towards your house, walking at the same footstep rate. still laughing, reminiscing what happened. "for what its worth, i think it was cool that you tried saving... what's the name? Mr. Bitey? that was very brave of you" you chuckled. you both finally arrived at your front yard "well, why thank you y/n. i think it was very brave of you as well to follow the green stranger"

your laughs died down while you both looked into each other's eyes, he's admiring your features and you're admiring his. it was silent for a few seconds until he asked, "why'd you runaway? why'd you avoid me?" you didn't know what to say, while avoiding his eyes you say "i was scared, i was contemplating my.." you sigh while he looks at you with hopeful eyes. "i discovered that i like yo-" he cuts you off, feeling the warmth of his lips while he hugs your waist. you both begin to laugh again, his hands still around your waist. "i liked you ever since-" he says until you both hear your name being shouted from your house

"Y/N I KNEW IT!!! I KNEW YOU WERE ALWAYS WITH THAT PRETTY BOY!!!"

"MOM I SWEAR ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK IT IS!!!" you peck his cheek, you whisper a quick 'i’msointoyo- imeantalktoyoutomorrowbye' winking back at him while running back into your house "moooommm let me explain wait-"

Dave turns around, starstruck, walks away feeling fulfilled. he didn't need to become a superhero, you were already one to him

a/n: ok i kinda cringed typing the last part but i ran out of ideas 🫠 thanks for reading!

#meiiie imagines #kick-ass #dave lizewski #dave lizewski x reader #aaron taylor johnson #dave lizewski imagine #dave lizewski x you #dave lizewski x fem! reader #atj x reader #kick ass 2 #dave lizewski fic #dave lizewski fanfic #aaron taylor johnson x reader #aaron taylor johnson imagine #Spotify

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samlizzy71 · 5 months

Note

Can I be honest? I like your art, I think it's really cute and pretty, but I also hate it because it makes me drown in envy and self-loathing. I'm a trans lesbian who would really like to be in a relationship, but I just can't seem to make it happen. I'm Avelyn looking for my Elizabeth, but it feels impossible. I'm introverted, clocky and socially awkward, so why would anyone, especially cis lesbians who probably have plenty of better options, ever want to date me?

I'm not really sure how to reply to this, and I'm sorry I can't tell you anything to make you feel better other than... Who knows? Just like Avelyn, who thought no one would ever love her, you may find your Elizabeth someday. Avelyn is introverted and socially awkward, and Elizabeth thought she was a boy when they met, but in the end, they are immensely happy, and it's not something that just happens in fiction. A lot of people have sent me messages telling me about how the story of Lizzy and Lynn is so much like the one they had with their partner with whom they share a life now, and I can't help but feel immensely happy for them, and it shows it can happen, it's possible. So, who knows? ^^ Maybe you'll find your Elizabeth someday, and I wholeheartedly hope you do. Not everyone is looking for looks or an extrovert x) You just need to meet the right person, and it happens when you least expect it. Also, I understand the envy x) I feel a lot of envy myself when I see people who had the chance to transition at an early age or perfectly pass, I even feel envy of my own OCs x) and yet they are my way of coping with the depression my dysphoria and experiences have caused me. Still, I want to see others be happy and have all the things I wish I could have. You can feel happy for others when you see them smile, and you can feel sad at the same time while wishing you could smile as much as them, and maybe that's what should motivate us to try to make the world a bit better, not only for ourselves but for others, to be the person we wish we had in our lives. Maybe we didn't have some chances, but, why not give them to others? After all, sometimes the people who have suffered the most because of something are the ones who will do anything so others don't have to go through the same. Avelyns are looking for their Elizabeths, but sometimes we can be an Elizabeth in another Avelyn's life, and I don't mean romantically or anything, but just, being kind and helping each other. Things will get better.

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keen-li · 6 months

Text

Marmalade : PEEL

Series : ongoing

Chapter title : PEEL

Synopsis: in order to keep this secret you and jungkook have from your brother, your Brother's friend gives you a condition.

"I won't tell your brother aslong as we keep fucking"

its not like you don't want to. you get you keep the secret from your brother and also get to fuck jungkook

. can you say no?

fuck boy jk.

Brother's best friend jk

college student reader

Warnings: mentions of weed (not direct with ocs), suggestive, time skips, flashbacks, smutty, mentions of sex, pet names, usage of y/n, marmalade.

Word count: 8k

Your shoes hit the concert of the pathway rhythmically as you strut down campus. The music you're listening to aiding your confidence. Walking down this campus you need all the confidence you can get. You're not as fashionable as the girls around, so you need confidence to keep up. You don't feel the need to be fashionable anyways. Most girls do it for the guys, but It's just guys who spend their time in lame circles smoking weed and shit, don't even have a stable source of income. Nothing special to dress up for.

"But you should still try something new" the person you've been avoiding for three weeks now said to you.

You've been dodging jungkook like the plague recently. Hiding in your room for as long as you can when he's downstairs with your brother. Wearing a large hoodie to hide your face when you're in public, not like it does much jungkook probably knows that hoodie. Or even using another route when going home just incase he might spawn somewhere on the road. You even went as far as turning off your phone at night, knowing that's the time jungkook mostly texts you.

Ever since that night in the kitchen.

"I won't tell as long as we keep fucking"

He honestly has the audacity to blackmail you. You should've told him to fuck off, but you didn't. Instead you agreed.

Sigh.

It's not like you regret saying yes, its just the thought that jungkook might tell on you once he gets tired of you freaks you out. It's possible for him to grow tired and you know that, he's got so many options. You're nothing special to him, though it does feels like you mean something when he has his hands all over you. Whispering how much time he has before your brother's back. Usually 30 minutes. And he sure does make sure that time is used wisley, having you in all kinds of posi-

Beep.

You don't turn to look at the source of your distraction. But in your peripheral vision you see a car slow down next to you. You walk a little faster hoping it's not him. It is, his voice tells you that.

"You can't ignore me forever" his voice is muffled by the music that's playing through your ears, but you can tell that smooth cheeky voice through whatever sound.

You sigh and roll your eyes. You've been caught, no running now.

You muster up the courage to finally speak head still faced forward.

"What do you want jeon" you speak nonchalantly.

"Oooh, were using last names" he says feigning a scared tone. You scoff at him.

"Why don't you come to my place so we can hangout" he says one hand on the steering wheel and the other arm against the window frame elbow out the window. He's eyes don't leave your figure that doesn't seem interested him but he knows otherwise.

"No"

You can hear him sigh as his car slows down even more and so do your steps, unconsciously.

"I guess I'm going to have to text him" you stop in your tracks as jungkook threatens to pull out his phone.

"Or maybe I should just call" he looks at you as if asking which one he should chose. He's so annoying.

You finally turn to him and speak "Don't you dare" you warn.

"Get in then" he looks forward wanting you to get into his car. He must think he's in some 80s movie with the way he's sat in his car. You've been avoiding jungkook for a reason and you can't let your efforts be blown away, but damn he makes it so hard to say no.

"Put your seat belt on" he says as you slam his car door shut. You then give him a i-was-going-to glare.

Soon his car's on the main road as you both sit in silence. You try to distract your mind by staring at the moving objects but your mind still can't move from the man sat comfortably with his hand on the wheel. He looks like he wants to say something but's thinking it through.

"How was class?" He finally spits out, clearing the silence.

"It was okay" you say falling back into awkward silence. Why is it so awkward all of a sudden between the two of you. Is it the unspoken tension. Where is it even coming from you wonder. For you maybe it's the unanswered question of why jungkook would still want to fuck you. And for jungkook maybe its the fact that you've been ignoring him. He couldn't help himself bit wonder if he crossed the line with his demand from that night. Did he make you uncomfortable? Did he fuck it up? He couldn't help but wonder these things, he should've just asked you. But again how would've that made him look.

"Did you miss me?" He turns to look at you shortly catching you rolling your eyes making him grin.

"Why would I do that?" You spit

"Remember that call" you cringe at the thought. You accidentally butt dialed jungkook and when he called you back you clarified. You and jungkook only call each other when you wanna meet up, so when you butt dialed him you were afraid he might get the wrong message. But after his few teasing comments he let it go. Not completely though.

"It was an accident I told you" you whine complaining.

"On purpose? an accident?" He takes a turn "there's a very thin line"

You scoff. Maybe he is right. You kinda wish he fought a little harder on that call.

" 'Kay" is what is he told you when you said it was really a mistake. You were playing hard to get, couldn't he tell? Even if you were ignoring him you still missed him. Just the physicals though.

You're leaning against jungkook's kitchen counter as he re-enters his kitchen, after getting a change of clothes. You wish you could also have a change of clothes, these just smell of your lecture and you really don't want to be reminded of that.

"You should stop leaving your shit here" he says handing you something. when he walked in you didn't notice the little lip balm he was holding. He stretches his had out so you can get it but you just stare at it analysing the brand and the flavour. He nudges his hand so you can get it but you shake your head and he twists his face confused. Your facial expression is kinda fallen showing the disturbance.

"That isn't mine" you speak feeling a nudge at your chest. "I don't use that brand or that flavour"

Jungkook sighs realising what he's done. But his next statement doesn't show any concern for a disturbed you.

"I guess yuji left it here" he shrugs turning around and placing the cylindrical tube, that's now your enemy, on the counter next to you. You just wanna pick it up and throw it against his head. Why are you even mad? You know what you and jungkook are, you shouldn't feel this way. Maybe it's the way jungkook doesn't care and goes back to talking like there isn't tension in your chest.

And cause you don't want to make a fuss about things and make shit awkward you decide to follow suit and just talk like you don't have a lump in your throat. Iys not like its his job to care or know what you're feeling.

"Want something to drink?" He asks back facing you as he stares into the fridge. Why did he even bother putting on a shirt, that see through shirt isn't hiding shit. And your eyes can't help but wonder. Wonder across from shoulder to shoulder. Wonder around the muscles that flex cause he's now bending slightly to see what's at the bottom of the fridge. Wonder down his spine to his tail bone where his Calvin klein band peeks out. Wonder, wonder, wonder and too much wondering.

Jungkook turns to look at you for the answer and when he catches you drooling he chuckles.

"Got a thing for backs?" He asks sarcastically. He's body is now turned to you and he places the canned drink next to you, since you haven't answered him he'll just give you what he wants. You clear your throat and straighten yourself awkwardly, eyes wondering away from him now.

"I wasn't looking at you" you lie trying to save your already gone self respect.

"Yea right? And I'm still a virgin" you chuckle at his childishness. Can he blame you, he's got a great back. And you haven't seen it in a while. Those long hours at the gym finally showing through.

You both stand against the counters sipping your drinks from time to time. Jungkook stands by the counter opposite from you so you have a direct sight of his body.

"You should stop giving me rides" you say and jungkook's eyes meet your face confused. What's wrong he wants to ask but it sounds too intimate, so he let's his eyes ask the question.

"Don't you think someone will think there's something going on?" You say voice a little timid. Your eyes fling to jungkook when you hear him release a chuckle.

"Everyone one knows I'm your Brother's friend, so giving you a ride shouldn't be that big of an issue" he shrugs off your concerns.

"I get that but people still talk" jungkook nods acknowledging.

"But do you know your Brother's the one who asks me to give you rides" he starts.

"The ones with my car atleast" he say with that cheeky grin of his. You get what he's saying and you throw him a stop it glare. Which he does as he adjusts himself against the counter and takes a sip of the liquid.

You calm from your chuckles "I didn't know he asked you to do that"

Jungkook doesn't say anything as you continue to speak.

"But still I don't think we should be seeing each other whilst in public " Your body goes back to being freaking anxious. The way you say it makes jungkook laugh, and there he goes again diminishing your serious concerns.

"Y/n you're acting like I have my hands on you when we're outside" he's right. Why are you making it so dramatic, its not that big of a deal but you still don't want any stories going around. The last thing you want is rumours and giving your brother ideas which aren't true, well they are but your don't want him to take it into consideration.

"I know but still..." your eyes fall as you stare at your feet against jungkook's floor. Pretty floor.

Jungkook understands your concern, rumours spread like wild fire on your campus. If you didn't have the 'jungkook is my Brother's friend' card to protect you, you're sure the both of you would be under heat right now. Mainly you cause everyone would want to know who jungkook might be fucking. In these situations no one really cares about the guy they just wanna find the girl and see if her looks match up.

Yours don't , that's what you think. During this time that you've been hiding from jungkook, you've been thinking about the fact that jungkook is outta your league. Your not unattractive in anyway, and you know that especially when jungkook's expressing to you how attractive you are, though you think it's the sex talking. You aren't unattractive, it's just that you aren't someone who stereotypically people would think jungkook is sleeping with. You've never brought these concerns to jungkook cause he honestly doesn't need to know. Would he even care.

Though he has told you countless times that you are very beautiful, in many ways. By the way he looks at you, the ways he touches you and the way he kisses you. Its just something that you need to work on by yourself and you aren't gonna drag jungkook into it.

Jungkook watches how your fingers tap against the counter and he knows you're anxious. So to comfort you he walks to you and puts his hand over your hand , stopping it from racing. Your eyes move to the man standing over you and when your eyes meet he can see that you're overthinking. His hand is warm over yours, you don't bother to turn to look at it knowing it's safe under his hold. It's calms you how Jungkook knows how to help you when you're overthinking, even though he doesn't know what you're overthinking about all he cares is that you realise you don't need to especially if it's about him.

"That's okay... if that's what you want " he reassures. You nod.

Jungkook doesn't know why he comforts you or feels the need to, maybe it's the fact that he's your Brother's friend so he feels that kind of need to protect you from whatever. Otherwise he doesn't know why he does it.

He watches how your lips pout, they're slightly tinted red, he knowsit's probably your lipstick, and he's always wanted to tell you how good you look with it on. And that whatever flavour you use tastes so good. He just wants to taste it once more and remove that pout and sad look from your lips. And so he does.

But before your lips meet he's interrupted by the buzzing of his phone against the counter. He doesn't give any facial expression you can read, not even a hum or a sigh. He picks up the phone quickly wanting the call to end so he can kiss you. He should've just turned off his phone.

He looks at the caller Id and sighs internally.

It's yuji.

Jungkook gives you one last look. "I'll be back" he says as you nod and he walks out. You're left wondering if its your brother who's called him, and your heart is beating quickly. What if someone told him you got into jungkook's car? And he's calling jungkook to know where you are cause you're not home. Many theories run through your mind and you're gonna be fucked if any of them involve your brother.

You're theories are proven wrong when you hear Jungkook say,

"Yuji I told you I can't come today"

Yuji? You've heard that name on campus before. But for what. You think for a while then it clicks.

It's the girl that's always on jungkook, you've heard many rumours about them, which you've never told Jungkook about before cause its not necessary. He's probably heard all of them before and if he has he's never talked about them with you, that's not what your relationship is about. Its kinda stupid to call it a relationship but you need a word for it and that's the only one that comes to mind.

You've heard some crazy rumours about jungkook and yuji. Some are that jungkook is obsessed with her and won't let her get into a relationship and that he beat up a guy she was chilling with, which sounds like bullshit and unlikely. You don't know jungkook enough to know if he's the jealous kind, you haven't gotten a chance to touch those waters yet. And if he is you aren't sure if you wanna touch those waters. You've thought about jealous jungkook whilst in bed before, helps you get off, but you don't think you'll ever get to know if he is. Cause your relationship isn't anything serious.

Another rumour is that yuji is the one obsessed with jungkook, this one's more likely. Cause she can't bare seeing him talk to another girl or even mention another girl's name. You heard through the grapevine that she got a girl expelled for even threatening to fuck jungkook. Does she even have the power to do that? Well her family is well off, like very much. So maybe it is possible, childish but possible. It's funny how you learn everything through the grapevine.

Another rumour you heard, this one is the most shocking. You heard that jungkook got yuji pregnant and she had to abort it. Why does this girl bother jungkook so much, it bothers you so much. You just wish you could tell her to leave him alone, but you aren't in any position to do so.

Anyway, you didn't want to believe the rumour but it was so hard when during that week jungkook was acting off. He never hangout with your brother or even responded to any one of your calls. You didn't want to bug so you left it. But the question ate at you every time, especially when you were worried about jungkook. And shortly during that week jungkook had went out of town and when he returned he told your brother that he went to his parent's place. Seems like it was a good move cause he came back to his normal self, laughing and joking with you.

"Missed me?" He said the first time you talked to him after all that happened.

You really wanted to ask him what the actual fuck happened. Were the rumours true? Why was he acting so off and reserved? But its not like its any of your business. So you didn't, you just let the questions eat at you. You're just here for the fucks and gags.

After that one you stopped listening to the rumours, not any other one. Whether about jungkook, students or the ghosts on campus at night. You don't listen to any of them. Cause after the jungkook ones you were kinda disturbed, out of it if you can say. You don't even know why, you just didn't like how people go around talking about others lives. Especially if it's someone you know.

Jungkook's call seems to be taking long and you're getting bored and tired. So you decide to look around his kitchen, throwing your now empty can into the bin on your way around. It's not like you've never been in his house, you have but when you have you've been too carried away by his lips and touches that you didn't even bother looking around. And even after you're done you're too carried with getting out of his house and rushing home. You've never spent a night in jungkook's House.

"You should get home before your brother gets suspicious" he says shirtless laying on the bed chest still sweaty from your deeds. He watches as you get dressed. You know that'd he'd ask you to go home, so you never even bother to stay longer.

"Let me call you a cab" he says reaching for his phone and the sheets covering his manhood move slightly.

"it's okay I've already called one" you knew that this would happen so you called a cab already. Always be prepared. He doesn't walk you out to your cab, just says he's goodbyes and tells you to greet your brother for him, which is a cheeky joke he likes to make.

Whilst in the cab you wonder why it bothers you that jungkook isn't so affectionate afterwards. You kinda wished he'd atleast walk you out to the cab, you understand why he doesn't drive you home. But he could atleast walk you out to the door or even give you a little goodbye kis- you don't even know why you think of these things, it's the silence that encourages your thoughts.

Shit.

You grunt and curse at the pain in your toe, you just hit your toe on the cupboard. It hurts so bad and you hope jungkook didn't hear the sound or even your now wearing out grunts and curses. After you're done looking after your toe you decide to open cupboard right above your head. It's labelled 'MARMALADE' so that catches your attention even more cause its the only labelled cupboard.

Your hand grabs the handle gently and you open the cupboard. Once you do your eyes are met with the numerous glass bottles filled with an orange jam like substance. Must be marmalade like the label said, but why does he have marmalade and why so many bottles.

You grab one carefully making sure not to let it slip and fall, the last thing you want Is to break something in jungkook's house when you don't even know how he'd react.

You play around with the glass jar admiring the orange colour and sweet citrus smell, you don't like fhe citrus smell but it does smell good. You're lost in the brightness of it that you don't hear jungkook enter.

"Sorry that took long" you're snapped out of it when you hear his voice.

"Just got a call from..."

"Was it my brother?" You ask

"No"

"Then you don't have to tell me anything" you don't even know what he was going to say but you don't need to know. He hums and mumbles a 'you're right'

He places his phone back on the counter.

"I see you've found my marmalade" he says nodding towards the bottle. You didn't even realise you still had it in your hands. You chuckle.

"Oh yeah found a bunch of them"

"Hope you don't mind " you look at him for assurance. And he shakes his head no.

"Looks like you like marmalade" you say placing the bottle down.

"Mhm"

"Why?" You ask. It might be digging too much in his personal life but you're just curious. It doesn't matter if he answers or not....

"It just tastes good" safe answer he thinks.

You look back at the bottle picking it up and analysing it once more. You didn't notice before but now you realise that it's brandless.

"What brand is it?"

"I make it myself " he walks towards you and stretches his hand so that you give the bottle to him.

"Explains why you have so many of them"

"Wanna taste?" He lifts his brow to you but you shake your head.

"I don't really like marmalade" you confess and jungkook lifts he's hand over your head to open the cupboard. He places the jar back in its place and with his hands over your head he looks down at you and you up at him. And says in a whisper...

"Well you're looking at it like you wanna have a taste" he stares at you longingly trapping you between him and the cupboard. You feel small under his longing gaze. You love how even just by the way he stares at you you can feel the heat travel your body. Before he moves away he licks his lips that you've been staring at hoping he'd kiss you and like he can tell he chuckles.

"So you wanna try it or no?" He stares at you the fridge door open and an opened marmalade jar in his hands. He waits for your response.

It's not like you're allergic to it, why would hurt just to try it. Plus jungkook looks like he really wants you to try it.

"Sure" you agree, "couldn't hurt"

He closes the fridge and grabs a tiny spoon. He's now standing in front of you spoon digging into the jar, and when you see him scoop a large amount you hum in disagreement.

"What?" He looks at you

"That's too much" he looks at the spoon.

"It's not too much" it is too much.

"It is jungkook"

"Come on, you can take it." He moves closer to you moving the spoon to your lips. You move your head.

"It's too much"

"Come on baby you've taken much more" you scoff.

"That wasn't jam jungkook " he chuckles knowing it's true. "That's going to be too sweet" you nod towards the spoon.

"Plus I told you I don't like it"

He sighs. "Come on take it for me. You won't eat everything"

You look at him with a raised brow.

"Please"

It's not that big of a deal so you nod and open your mouth slightly, jungkook smiles and brings the spoon to your mouth. The sweet jam meets your lips and some goes onto your tongue. You can immediately taste the sweetness and citrus flavour.

Jungkook tilts the spoon wanting you to take everything. He's such a liar. When you realise what he's doing you start to hum for him to stop, but he doesn't, it amuses him actually. You turn your head away and in your struggle you cause some marmalade to fall off the spoon and into your open chest. You whine jungkook's name as you look at the drop of jam on your chest.

"Look at what you've done y/n" he says in a lecturing tone. Your eyes widen as you see him bend to your chest , his hands on both sides of you holding the counter.

"W-what are you doing?" You know what he's doing, and it makes your chest rise up and down at a quick rate. And now that he's by your chest you're sure he can see it.

"I'm cleaning your mess" he says and the way his eyes watch yours from under you makes you push your body close to him. He sinks in lower his breath now on your chest. His sleek tongue meets your skin licking the jam right off you, you lean your head back giving jungkook more room to roam.

"Sweet" he mumbles against your skin as he moves up to place a wet kiss on your neck.

"So how does it taste" he asks moving back to watch your flushed face. You even forgot about the taste of the marmalade, only remembering how jungkook felt against your skin.

"Uhh" you search your brain to see if it remembers what the marmalade tastes like. And after a hard fight to get through the thoughts of jungkook you remember.

"Not bad. Seeing that you made it yourself" he watches your face as you speak, finding joy in the way you say things.

"But i still don't like it " jungkook moves away from you, and you can physically feel the feeling of his loss of presence from you. You watch him as he takes back the jar.

"You will one day"

You roll your eyes at that. Nothing can make you like marmalade.

You and jungkook talk about somethings, nothing to deep. Just some Harry Potter stuff. You go back and forth arguing about some situations in the movies and you laugh at the opinions he has and he scoffs at some of yours. You never knew jungkook liked Harry Potter nor did he know you liked it too.

"I could've had voldemort on his knees in he first movie" you roll your eyes

"Oh please. You wouldn't survive."

"Have you even these?" He proceeds to flex his biceps for you and you burst out laughing showing him your pretty smile. Has he ever told you,you have a pretty smile. He joins you in your fit of laughter.

As you calm down from your laughter and have nothing else to laugh about or say, your mind begins to wonder why jungkook brought you here. You know why he brought you here but you don't know why he's taking so long with it, you thought licking marmalade off your bare chest was a perfect opening but he didn't use it. Most of the time it doesn't take long before both of you are at eachother. But today he's taken so much time that you've even gotten the time to talk about your personal hobbies, likes and dislikes. Which you haven't done before.

But you have enjoyed just talking with jungkook. Getting to know somethings you didn't before like he can make and likes marmalade or that he also likes Harry Potter. Its nice to just talk like this. But you want to know why he brought you here still. Does he just wanna chat?

"Anywany why did you bring me over " a little straight forward but you want to know. You don't wanna put your mind or any other vital organ in the wrong places.

"To hang out of course" he doesn't convince you and you keep a raised brow at him while he smiles suspiciously at you.

Hangout you did do. If you're talking about lips then yes you guys did hangout. You knew he didn't bring you here for fun and you're kinda happy that he got on with it immediately after you asked why he brought you to his home. You missed his touch, soft sweet touches like his marmalade.

And afterwards you left just like every other night. But tonight your thoughts are filled with wondering what other things jungkook might like.

You were chilling in the living room when jungkook came over to visit your brother. He tried to kick you out of the living but you refused.

"You found me here" you say. Your brother, kept bickering with you but you stood your ground. You notice jungkook chuckle at your bickering.

"It's fine maybe she's watching a good movie " jungkook says pointing to the movie you're watching and stopping your pointless arguing. Your brother sighs giving in, why didn't he just do that instead of arguing with you.

"Brought these" he hands you a bag and your brother a bag.

"What's this?" Your brother asks.

"Just some snacks"

"Thanks bro"

You can hear them talk in the background as you open the bag jungkook gave to you. Immediately you open it the citrus smell hits your senses and you scoff. You reach into the bag and pull out a sandwich in a clear zip lock bag. You analyse the substance in-between the bread.

Scoff.

You roll your eyes at jk and find him looking at you, winking when your eyes meet. You roll your eyes and scoff placing the bag onto your side. He really thinks you're gonna eat it, or make you like it. Instead you take the drink that was in the bag and take a sip of that instead.

You don't pay much attention to your brother and jungkook's conversation, your eyes focused on the screen. But your casually steal glances of jungkook hoping he doesn't notice.

Your attention is caught when you hear your brother mention a girls name. Seems like he's talking about a girl he has his eyes on. They keep talking about it for some time until you hear your brother say.

"What's the name of the girl you're fucking?"

The air in your lungs is swept out when your brother asks that question. Is he talking about you? If he was he wouldn't look this chilled about it. But you still feel kinda anxious cause what if jungkook says your name. So you look at him but he's eyes aren't on you but you feel like that grin on his face is directed to you.

"Yuji" your brother exclaims remembering the name. Jungkook turns to look at you with that smirk and watches how your face relaxes. He chuckles at that and turns back to your brother.

"Yeah that's her name"

"How is she"

"She's okay I guess. It's not like we're dating for me to care" jungkook leans back onto the couch.

"You and your fuckboy ways"

"Don't say it like that" jungkook chuckles "I'm not a fuck boy. I just don't commit"

Your brother gives a whatever-you-say hum. You start to feel a little awkward and weird in the room. You know jungkook doesn't commit but being reminded of it causes a pinch in your chest. You know better than to think anything more of what you and jungkook do. But it still kind of affects you.

"You can keep your badboy persona as long as you leave my sister out of it" you roll your eyes, why does he treat you like a child. It's so irritating.

"Don't worry..." jungkook turns to look at you, gaze filled with nothing but mischief.

"I'd never fuck or date your sister"

"You're bad for not eating my sandwich."

Jungkook speaks through your speaker. His voice low and you know he's laid back on his bed shirtless while a movie plays in the background. You know cause onetime on a video call he was in that same position, very distracting position.

"But you knew I wouldn't eat it" you say playing with the strings of your pajama shorts.

"Yes but I had hope you never hated me enough to not eat it"

You can hear him shuffle against his sheets. You chuckle

"You put your hope in the wrong places jeon"

As simple as your words are and unbeknownst to you, those words find a way to jungkook's heart.

You were right he did put his hope in the wrong places, he did it so many times and foolishly that he swore to himself he'd ever place his hope anywhere again.

"Gone silent?" he didn't even realise that until you spoke.

"Fuck no.."

"You just talk a lot. Was hoping you'd shut up"

You laugh cause you know he's just joking with you.

"I'll never shut up"

"If I was there you would " you can hear his cheeky and playful tone. If he was here you'd definitely shut up, even from across the phone jungkook's words always seem to find you and cause a swarm of butterflies to swarm in your stomach.

"Fuck off: you manage to say trying to hide the excitement caused by his words.

"Wanna come over" and the butterflies are buzzing at this point. You wanna say yes but you remember his statement earlier and you take this time to tease him.

"After you told my brother you'd never fuck his sister "

Jungkook's low and deep chuckle follows after and you feel the ripples it causes in you.

"What can I say...I'm a good liar"

"How do you think I'm able to keep our little secret?"

You roll your eyes at his cheeky and proud tone. He's so full of himself.

"I'll be there soon" you hear Jungkook hum before you cut the call and prepare an excuse like; I'm going to one of my friend's house. You don't even need to tell your brother where you're going but you do it just so he knows you're okay.

"I'd never fuck or date your sister"

Thay phrase has been playing on your mind quite often lately, you don't even understand why. Would jungkook really never date, did he say that seriously or was he saying that just for your brother. You know jungkook doesn't date but if he did, Would he date you? That's all you wanna know it's not like you care but you just want to know if you're date-able in jungkook's eyes. That's all you wanna know. That all.

"So you won't eat my marmalade sandwich but you'll eat that " you hear a voice speak and you don't even have to turn to know who it's for. Instead you turn your eyes to what you assume the voice is talking about. A chocolate donut.

"Just tastes professionally made" you say finally turning to the man standing by the table. He's in black sweats and a black hoodie. He always looks so good in that hoodie.

"These hands are professional babe... and you should know that"

You scoff at that and wonder what he's doing here. Since when does jungkook come to the café on a weekday.

"Maybe my marmalade isn't good?" he pouts. You know he's sad look is just a facade, jungkook never gets emotional around you and you're not sure how you'd handle it cause jungkook always seems like an emotionally well put together person and you admire that. He doesn't let things get to him or atleast he doesn't show it.

"Your marmalade isn't bad. I told you I just don't like marmalade" you take a sip of your coffee as jungkook watches you intently. His mind slips into a thought and he smirks at it before speaking.

"Why don't I show you how to make it and maybe you'd like it after" he straightens his figure making him appear even taller than he did before. Why is he so head in about making you like marmalade.

"At my place tonight" he says winking at you causing to smile.you wonder if he genuinely wants to teach you or its just an excuse to do your little shenanigans. You're still thinking about what he's just said and before you respond you're interrupted by a soft feminine voice calling out jungkook's name. He turns his to eyes the girl who latches herself onto jungkook's arm.

She smiles up at him and he smiles back at her.

"Okay maybe not tonight...but I'll text you when"

The smile you had on your face had been wiped off at this point. You didn't notice but you were glaring at the girl, if looks could kill she'd be dead. You're not sure what emotion is triggered in you but you know its not anything friendly. You were excited about the idea of going to jungkook's tonight and you were gonna tell him yes, after playing hard to get a bit. But this long haired mini skirt wearing chick has ruined it. Looking at her description, she must be yuri. Doesn't make anything better.

You hadn't responded to jungkook and the nudge on your shoulder reminds you to do so. You nod not saying anything, afraid that if you opened your mouth you'd spew profanities at her, so instead you just nod finally moving your burning gaze off of her. She hasn't noticed your look cause her eyes are either glued to her phone or to jungkook. She can't even bother to introduce herself. BRAT .

"OKAY see ya marmalade girl " he says walking away with the girl arm in arm with the food they just ordered.

You scoff. And after you do that you catch yourself. Why does it bother you so much, you don't care you shouldn't care. It just makes you a little mad, just a little. But you shouldn't feel this way, it doesn't matter whatever you feel, jungkook is never gonna change his ways and you should get used to that if you're gonna keep fucking jungkook.

Sigh.

You wish you hadn't said yes. Maybe it would've been better if your brother found out than you having to feel these unknown and unspoken emotions. Which are one-sided.

You've been unconsciously and unwilling waiting for the text jungkook promised to send you. Well he didn't promise but it did feel like one. He doesn't even need to call you over, it's okay if he's changed his mind. That's what you've been telling yourself.

Your heart has been on the edge this week, especially when you hear that little notification sound. But after two weeks, felt like forever, he finally seemed to remember his promise and texted you.

"Wash your hands" he says to you. "I don't know what you've been touching" you roll your eyes at him and glare at him. You should be the one telling him that. Seeing that you've been hearing about him and yuri together. You don't even mean to indulge yourself in rumours but you can't help it when you hear jungkook's name especially if it's side by side with a girl's name. Cause you might never know one day that girl's name might be yours and that's a day you dread. Even the thought causes your heart to physically ache.

Jungkook hands you an apron and you admire the little orange whirly pattern on it. Its so cute. Kinda reminds you of what a grandma would have in their kitchen. You'd never pin jungkook as the type of person who would care about having to wear an apron whilst in the kitchen, but by the look of things he looks like he takes it very seriously.

"Careful we don't want a bloody marmalade" he says noticing the way your hand slipped when cutting the orange. You really hoped he didn't notice but he did. You aren't usually the nervous kind in the kitchen in most situations you're usually what jungkook is right now in the kitchen, the teacher. But you do feel nervous under jungkook's gaze currently, that's what's making you so clumsy. He watches you so closely and you feel kinda suffocated by his presence even though he isn't standing so close to you. He doesn't need to be close to you to make you feel small and vulnerable under him.

"Why do you even like MARMALADE so much" its more of a rhetorical question to tease him for his interest in Marmalade so much.

"I don't know" he starts.

"It's just got a taste I can't find anywhere else" he whispers into your ear, you didn't even notice that he moved his lips to your ear, the waves of his sudden tone sending electric waves to your core. The way he says it so calm and sure almost like he's speaking to you but you know he's just talking about Marmalade.

You muster up the courage to only hum not knowing what might leave your mouth if you opened it. Maybe a plea for jungkook to just bend you over right here over his counter.

"Now that that you're done we can start" you didn't even realise you had finished, you're pretty sure jungkook watched you peel air for some time before deciding that he was amused enough by your lost look. He can tell what you're thinking, he knows when you get like that. And he loved watching your mind get lost in thoughts cause of him. He loved how your pupils would distance and you'd bite your lower lip thinking about him, he knew you were thinking about him. But he'd never dare tell you he knows cause he's afraid you'd might get shy and stop doing it, he knows you get shy sometimes and he likes it especially when it's him you get really shy for.

But he thinks you're so cute when you get shy cause of him.

Has he ever told you that?

It wasn't long after jungkook set the jam to boil that he had you bent over the counter pounding into you mercilessly. He couldn't hold in the burning feeling inside his lower belly anymore, with the way that shirt is hugging your breasts and the way he's been wondering if you're wearing his favourite panties inside those sweats of yours. You were. He loves these panties he kinda felt sad at the thought of removing them. So he didn't. He rubbed your heat and fucked you with your panties on.

You never knew how much of a turn on it was until now. Being bent over with your panties still on your face against his cold marble counter as he fucks into you.

A taste I can't find anywhere else.

He keeps thinking about that as you clench around him soon milking him for all he's got. Your little whimpers and whines guiding his movements. He smirks as pride rushes through his veins at your occasional call of his name.

"Since when do you like MARMALADE?" Your brother asks you watching as you place the little jar into the fridge.

"I don't like it, jk just gave me some of what w-he made... I'm not even going to eat it" you close the fridge, turning to face your brother who shrinks his eyes at you.

"Did you know jungkook makes marmalade?" You say chuckling remembering your reaction to when you first found out.

"I did " he says not sounding as enthusiastic or excited like you, then you realise you probably shouldn't be so excited about anything to do with jungkook in front of your brother.

"I'd never say this to his face but even though I don't like it, I think it tastes quite good." You shrug in your own thoughts.

He watches you like a detective trying to decipher your facial expression. He doesn't think much of it only wondering why you're getting marmalade from jungkook or how you even got to find out that he makes marmalade.

"Are you hanging out with jk now?" The question comes out sharp and brutal and it snaps you out of your thoughts, you turn to your brother who has his hands folded in suspicion.

"He just gave me some marmalade. What's the big deal?" You shrug it off hoping he doesn't pry. Did you fuck this up for you and jungkook.

"Don't get too close to him. He might be my friend but he will fuck you over if you get too comfortable" you know he's saying this cause he just cares about you and is trying to protect you. But he doesn't need to protect you from jungkook, you don't think jungkook would fuck you over like that. He might not be the most affectionate or open but you doubt he'd ever fuck you over. He's not like the other fuck boys you know, he's not even a fuck boy in your opinion.

But you do understand where your brother is coming from.

"I'm not even talking to him in that way. I don't even talk to him" your face grows sadder cause your brother is right, you can't put all your trust into jungkook, like you did the others, he might end up fucking you over too.

"That's how it starts. Plus he's my friend not yours" he says coldly as he walks out, his words prick at your heart and you're reminded of your place.

You never actually thought you and jungkook would come this far with your fucking around, you thought it'd be a one time thing but it ended up not being that.

Do you regret it? No.

You just hate how the after effects feel, the realisation and the effort you have to put in to hide it from your brother. It's been such a burden on you lately on your heart causing you to feel things you can't explain. You just wish jungkook wasn't your Brother's friend. In another universe maybe.

That night while having your nightly thoughts you got a text from jungkook.

[Jk] have you tried it yet?

You were glad that he was the one to text you in that moment especially with the way you're feeling, it's like he knows. But that's what you think he probably doesn't know and is texting you oblivious to your racing mind that always seemed to be calmed down by his presence even though he was the reason why your mind has been going crazy nowadays.

[You] Not yet.

you text back as soon as you can.

[Jk] why not?

[Jk] are you waiting to try it together?😏

And there goes the blush on your cheeks and the butterflies in your stomach.

[You] That doesn't sound like a bad idea.

you hope you sound confident through this text cause you aren't feeling quite like it while sending it.

[Jk] should we the next time we hang out?

Hang out? He honestly shouldn't even call it a hangout cause you do anything but hangout. Maybe he should call it a pending fuck session.

[You] sure that will be great.

you hope you don't sound desperate.

[You] and can you send me a written recipe

you've wanted him to send you one for some time you don't even know why cause you aren't even interested in Marmalade.

[Jk] is marmalade girl interested in making marmalade🤨

You can hear his mocking tone from behind that text and you scoff sending him the rolling eyes emoji.

[You] No

[You] Just wanna know how to just in case

[Jk] just in case what?

You feel the conversation turn a little emotional.

[You] just in case I wanna practice making it and you aren't around.

That's bullshit and you know it, you never plan on making marmalade you just said that cause you don't have an excuse for that message you sent. Its like marmalade is the only way you'll ever get to know more about jungkook and so you're gonna use it. You should honestly take heed of the warnings your brother gave you.

Don't get too comfortable.

Honestly you shouldn't why the fuck do you even want to know more about jungkook. You should honestly just stick to fucking and calling it a night its always been better that way. You're not sure what other problems might arise from trying to get to know jungkook.

[Jk] I'm always gonna be around y/n

You'd honestly forgotten you were even talking about marmalade so when he said they it made a pull at a usual spot in your heart. A spot you left untouched and bruised.

[You] too sweet, you'll make it spoil

(Its a jam joke) you try and set the scene back to a comfortable and unserious one.

You know jungkook gets the joke when he sends you the laughing emoji

[Jk] I'll send you the recipe

[Attachment sent]

Open

Firstly peel your freshly washed oranges...

Taglist: @skzthinker @kissyfacekoo @ohsweetmimosa @httpjeonlicious

#fanfic #jungkook #jeon jungguk #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #bts #jeon jungkook #jungkook au #bts jungkook #jungkook imagine #jeongguk #jeon jeongguk #jeon jeongkook #kpop fanfic

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twice-inamillion · 11 months

Text

Playing In The Future Home

Fluff and Smut

1.4 K words

(Jihyo and OC making new memories)

"I can't wait to see where we are going to build our future house," Jihyo said as she looked outside the window. The two of you are on your way to visit the plot of land that you showed her before through FaceTime.

"Minji gave me the keys to the gate so we can park the car inside and walk around." Jihyo puts up her hands closer, "Look, my hand is shaking from how excited I am right now."

"Don't be nervous. I know you are going to like it. We are almost there; just a couple more minutes."

You exit the highway and immediately make a left turn. Then drive down the windy road up a small hill and turn right into a private road. Only two hundred feet into a private road filled with trees and bushes, you are met with a large metal gate, "I'm going to open the gate; I'll be right back." Once the gate is open, you drive inside and close the gate around before driving again. The dirty road eventually leads you to a grass-filled field, "we're here."

The two of you get out of the car; Jihyo walks around for a bit as you get your backpack and binder. "What do you think?"

"It's amazing, and it's big. I love the trees and bushes that surround the entrance."

"Yes, Minji said that the previous owner fenced the entire estate so their animals wouldn't get out. Makes it easier for us because it ensures our privacy."

You take out your binder and show Jihyo some sketches that you and Minji worked on for the past two days. "Look, here are some examples of the potential layout," as you point at the 2D view of the whole estate. "This right here is the layout of the entrance layout just came in front, and we are standing here," as you point at the spot you are standing in. "The lot is huge, and it does have a slight hill towards the back and trees throughout the lot. What Minji and I thought was to keep the entrance untouched, just grass and the house in the middle. Because the area has so much space, we have the option of a one-story house that has spread out or a two-story house. We can also have detached buildings like a music room and multiple guest houses away from the main house but still close. We can even have a large pool with a building on its own, but we would need to childproof it. We have a lot of options to make this place perfect. Towards the back of the lot are multiple trees and a small stream that runs across the end of the property."

The both of you walk around, and Jihyo tries to visualize the house with the binder in her hands. "I like it, and I think the members will be happy. When do you think we can buy it and start building?"

"I talked to Minji about it, and she said that the owner has wanted to sell the property for a while since all his family has moved to the city abroad and has no more use for it. Regarding the building, we can talk to a few contractors and get the permits ready after we buy the property. Shouldn't be too long, but it all depends on the layout of the house."

"The faster, the better; I can just see the babies running around and having fun with each other. I want Jisoo to have a memorable childhood and grow up safe without the eyes of the public on her and the rest."

"She will; just imagine her playing with the twins on a swing or going down the slide. It's going to be perfect." You hold her hand and start to walk, "let me show you the best part." The both of you walk up toward the end of the property, where you see a hill surrounded by numerous trees. There is a special tree that is much older than the rest, and as you both get closer, Jihyo is amazed by its size, "Wow, the tree is huge."

"The tree isn't the only thing; turn around." Jihyo turns to see a fantastic view of the landscape. Her future is right before her, and the rest of the world is in the background. "Omg, the view is wonderful. Thank you, oppa," hugging you.

"Everything here is for us, our future. You deserve the whole world, and I will try my best to give you that." Jihyo tears up from happiness, and the both of you share a passionate kiss.

"Thank you."

After settling down, you both sit on the blanket and snacks you brought and enjoy a bottle of wine. Jihyo, a good drinker, enjoys the wine more than you and, little by little, gets tipsy. "Oppa, want to mess around a little bit? We're alone, so we can have a little fun," giving you a sexy wink.

"For you, I'm able to go all the way."

She pushes you down, gets on top of you, and starts to unbutton your shirt. "Don't do anything; I'll take care of everything and just enjoy." With your chest exposed, she kisses every inch of you, "oppa, you have a manly chest; I love it."

You give a soft moan as she kisses your neck, "Jihyo, it hurts."

Jihyo looks down and sees the large bulge in your pants, "Oh wow, hard already?"

"It's just that you're too sexy, I can't help it."

She undoes your pants and fishes out your cock. "Don't worry, little fellow; you'll get your turn soon enough." Once she's done with your neck, she stands up and pulls down her leggings and panties. Jihyo sits on your shaft, causing you to moan, "Ahhh, you're bending my cock."

"Hmmm, I can feel your cock throbbing, but it's not time yet," as she begins to grind on you. The feeling of her lips hugging your cock throws you over the edge, and Jihyo knows it. "How do you like that? You like it when I grind my pussy on your cock?"

"Jihyo, please don't tease; let me put in it."

"Just a bit longer," as she increases the pace. She puts more of her weight on your cock, causing you to moan in pain. "Fuck, I can feel your hot cock throbbing. You're such a bad boy, but good job on holding on. Here is your reward."

Jihyo grabs your cock and lifts herself, aligning it to her entrance. You watch as the head of your cock spreads her lips apart, causing you to gasp, "Fuck, you're so tight." She drops her whole weight, and her cunt swallows you whole, "Ahh… fuck, you're cumming already?"

You grab her waist and hold her tight, "take all of my cum!" She places her hands on your chest and digs her nails as she begins to ride you as you cum inside her. "Let it all out; I'll milk you of all you're worth."

You see her lustful eyes, the eyes of someone who's found her prey. She rides you as you cum, her tits swaying from side to side, "come on baby, do you like how I ride your big cock? Your cock that's filling me up with baby batter. Stay hard for me, okay."

Jihyo, with her head on your chest, can hear your heavy breathing, she knows that she has you in her hands. "You think you can go for another round?"

“Ye…yeah… I… I can."

She sits back up, ties her hair in a ponytail, looks you in the eyes, and begins to ride you once more. You can help you move your gaze, but she says, "Don't, look at me. You're mine."

All you hear now is the noise of flesh grinding against each other, Jihyo's tight walls choking your cock.

She rides you for about five minutes until you cum once, filling her womb with baby batter. "Yeah… just like that. Fill me up with your cum” as she tightens up her cunt. Once she's done milking you for the second, she lifts herself up and lays beside you.

Haven gotten a happy ending you look at her erect nipple and attach yourself you it. "Aww, my poor baby, there, there. Suck on mommy's tits until you're full, okay" as she caresses your head. You fall asleep attached to her breast as Jihyo hugs you tight in her arms.

#twice smut #kpop smut #male reader #twice fluff #kpop fluff #twice jihyo #jihyo smut #jihyo fluff #TM smut

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starcrossedxwriter · 9 months

Text

Wicked Fantasies Part 6 (MBJ x OC)

Warnings: Look… its literally just angst lol you're gonna feel things! Don't say I didn't warn you. NSFW

A/N: This is like 2 weeks later than I promised (SO sorry, y'all!) but I hope you enjoy!

***

“This isn’t so bad,” Michael argued. “She’s just complaining that she hasn’t met me yet and some other shit that isn’t even true. Why’s that a problem?”

Alex shook her head as she scrolled on her phone. Her eyes did not even leave her phone screen as she spoke, her nails furiously tapping across the glass screen. “It’s not what she said that’s the problem. It’s that she’s talking at all… the only things I want to see in the media about the two of you are cute photos from date night, not tell alls from family members. Does she know about your… previous career?”

This was the first time his manager had even directed a question at Raven, who had sat silently since they arrived. She was so angry that she could not even revel in the fact that she was at Michael’s house for the first time, not regulated to her usual place in his bachelor pad. She thought being invited to this intimate part of his life would make her happier. But instead of feeling joy and welcomed, she merely felt like a burden. She was only there out of necessity to fix the crisis her own sister created.

This is why you can never be more, she reminded herself. Paris had started to rip out the weeds of doubt that grew in her soul, siphoning away the power of the notion that they could not be more. It had made her fall deeper in love with him, made her seriously ponder whether his feelings for her stretched into deeper territory.. But this? This reminded her of a sickening fact.

No matter how many trips he charted for her, gifts he showered her with, or kindness he showed, she did not belong here with him in the real world. It was as if every intimate detail of his home and his real life that she saw screamed at her that she was out of place, punching above her weight, and needed to return to where she belonged: the outskirts of his life in the condo where he took one-night stands and flings that meant nothing once the sun rose. Because as soon as their arrangement was done, she would be nothing to him again. And while Paris had made her feel like she could still win in the ring, now she felt as if she was merely being punched right back down where she belonged.

“No. Well… she doesn’t know about the prostitution. But… I always thought she figured out I was a stripper somehow.”

Alex, who previously had been engrossed in her phone, lifted her head in surprise. “You were a stripper too? Would’ve been nice to know before now,” she muttered under her breath.

Raven’s long stiletto nails bit into the palm of her hand as she tried not to let one comment push her right off the cliff she was teetering on. She knew Alex was not intending to be judgmental but that did not stop her from feeling the sting of it. Every choice she made in her life since the moment she came into the world seemed to be a bad one for everyone else. She could not do anything right.

“I was a 19 year old with no skills who needed to pay for college. I wasn’t facing a fucking mountain of options. So I did the best I could with a shitty situation... Sorry my choices as a desperate teenager are making your job so difficult,” Raven snapped.

“I didn’t me-”

“Alex.” Michael’s stern voice cut through the budding tension, stealing the words right out of Alex’s mouth. Michael’s dominance and power seemed to have an effect on everyone, though Raven suspected it was because he was not the type to abuse it. Alex immediately let the rest of her sentence fade away, opting to apologize instead.

Michael’s eyes had not left Raven’s body since they got in the car. He hated how her eyes actively avoided him, he had been unable to look in her beautiful brown eyes for over an hour and that killed him. They were the most expressive part of her, windows into her soul and every feeling she had. She shied away from his comforting touch in the car so he kept his distance but even still, he could see how her entire frame trembled ever so slightly. Her furrowed brow… her silence. God, her silence was so deafeningly loud in his ears. He was not used to it. Even if it was awkward ramblings, she was rarely silent with him. This was a side of her he had never seen. It was not sadness or resignation, he had seen both of those, and she seemed to be able to push through those just fine. No, this was something else and it was red hot and all consuming to the point where he could tell she could not hide it. It was a far cry from the woman who was sound asleep on his shoulder on the plane two hours prior.

“I’m sorry,” Alex raised her hands. “I’m sorry. I’d never judge anyone for doing what they need to. I just need to know what else your sister could say.”

“She has no proof… just speculation. But that’s it. She doesn’t know anything about my life now… we aren’t close.”

At first, she had immediately handed Alex back her phone, uninterested in reading whatever lies her sister decided to spew. However, when Michael summarized it for her, the notions in it were so absurd, she had to read them for herself. She instantly wished she had not.

It was as dramatic as it was false, her sister complaining about how Raven had changed and alienated her own family since her romance with the superstar had begun. She spun a web of tall tales about how Raven never spoke to them anymore, how close they once were and how much the family missed her, how Raven had told them Michael was too busy to meet them. By the time Raven got to the end of the article, she was shaking.

She supposed the silver lining was that the article was more of a personal attack on her character than their relationship, which she was used to from her sister. She just had not expected her sister to drag it into the public eye like this. And while reading her words agitated some of her deepest wounds, they fueled more anger in her than any other emotion. Anger was not an emotion Raven often felt where her family was concerned. Slight frustration, sadness, hurt, guilt? She felt all of those often but she was used to it and often brushed them off. But true anger? That was rare, or rather, it was rare that she let herself feel true anger. And now, it hit her as high, powerful waves crashing against her shores.

“So she’s just lookin’ for her 15 minutes. Fine. But she can’t say anything else, this’s gotta be it.”

“Who cares if she mouths off to the media?” Michael asked. He knew why Alex cared and why he should care. But at that moment, all he could actually care about was minimizing this for Raven’s sake. He knew her well enough to know that the only person she would blame for this was herself, not her idiot sister. And it seemed to him that she blamed herself for far too much where her family was concerned. He did not want to add another unnecessary thing to that list. Nor did he want her to feel the burden of this because she was quite the opposite of a burden to him and he would clean up 100 PR nightmares for her without a second thought. They had taken 10 steps forward in Paris, walls came crumbling down for both of them. If he did not fix this fast, Raven would retreat 15 steps back from him and he could not take that.

“That’s not the point! She’s smoke and TMZ knows where there’s smoke, there’s a fuckin’ fire. And y’all two and this whole situation is a damn forest fire. We don’t need TMZ or a fuckin’ Inspector Gadget head ass Tik Toker to look into Raven’s life or past anymore than they already have. So you need to shut her up now. Is she a fan of his or somethin?”

Raven scoffed. “If wanting to add him to her list of fuck buddies means she’s a fan then sure… she’s a fan.” Her anger meant she could not hide the bitterness in her voice, could not pretend to have a kind word to say about her sister who seemed to take joy in going out of her way to ruin all the good things in her life.

“Well, that shit definitely ain’t happenin’,” Michael stated with a growl.

“I mean, no nigga, I wasn’t gonna suggest you fuck her sister.” Alex rolled her eyes.

“Maybe we s-should just end this. I’m causing more problems than I’m fixing.” Raven’s voice was so quiet, Michael almost did not hear her. It hurt her heart to even consider it but Paris had rubbed her raw, left her and her emotions exposed in ways she had not experienced in a long time. And she had not minded that at first, she savored the closeness and vulnerability with another person. But now, all of her emotions felt dialed up by ten in that vulnerability and that overwhelmed her. She was overwhelmed by the rage she felt at her family for trying to use Michael the way they used her. She thought she couldn’t ruin him but she felt as if she already was. “I’m r-ruining everything…”

Michael’s heart stopped, his head shaking vehemently before any words could even escape his lips. “What? No… why would we do that?”

Raven’s head fell into her hands as she let out a frustrated and strangled sigh that sounded like a sob.

“Ok, let’s all take a breath. I’m sorry, I probably made this seem like a bigger deal than it is. We don’t need to stop or end it if you aren’t ready to. This is still a good plan, no one is ruining anything. We can fix this. We just need to give her what she wants. If you just meet her, take a picture with her, get her tickets to a high profile event or party or whatever she wants, then maybe she’ll settle down and keep her mouth shut.”

“She won’t,” Raven mumbled to no one in particular.

“Everyone has a price and we just need to find hers,” Alex continued texting on her phone.

“She won’t because she’s an attention seeking bitch. She’s never had a real job or ambition or anything going for her and just takes and takes and takes from everyone with no thought. I can give her the fucking world and she’ll come back with her hand still out!” Raven exploded, jumping up from her seat as the words escaped her lips before she could even hope to stop them. She buried her face in her hands and turned away from both of them as she heard them in the space, instantly regretting them. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

Michael sighed and gestured toward the door, Alex walking out of the room with him. He closed the door behind them.

“So I take it there’s some bad blood there?” Alex asked as she leaned on the door.

“Lots of it. You know how family shit is… lots of heavy ass baggage there. Let me talk to her and I’ll call you tonight with a game plan. I think she just feels betrayed and upset and needs to process all that.”

“Understood,” Alex raised her hands in surrender. “Take your time, give her what she needs. Sorry this had to happen as soon as you came back. She seemed really happy when y’all got off the plane, I didn’t mean to ruin it.”

Michael shook his head. “Doing your job isn’t ruining anything. But my guess is the timing of this, on her sister’s part, wasn’t random. Sucks too… the past week was the most relaxed I’ve ever seen her, first time she seemed actually happy.” Michael stared through the glass panels of his office door to watch her. He could see the tension in her shoulders from all the way over here, could tell they were shaking slightly from silent tears.

He turned away to look back at Alex whose eyes were big with shock.

“What?”

“You’re in love with her.”

“Alexxxx…” he dragged out her name, his manager scoffing and dragging him by the arm further away from the door.

“Don’t insult my intelligence, Bakari. I’ve run a couple PR relationships in my time and most fail miserably. Been trying to figure out why this one seems to be working so well… I knew it wasn’t cause you’re that good of an actor, no shade. It’s because you… Michael Bakari Jordan love her. You’re not having to play for the cameras because you’re actually in love with her. Look me in my eyes and tell me I’m wrong.”

Michael sucked his teeth. “I love her.” He admitted. “And I know what you’re gonna say… it can’t work and it’s stupid and I’ll need to end it like we always planned. I know, I got it.”

He started to move past her when her hand grabbed his bicep to stop him.

“I was actually gonna say that I’m happy for you. Been waiting for you to wise up and find someone for real. If she’s what you want, I support it and you 100%. And we can figure out how to spin it.” She jerked her head back toward the office. “Go take care of your girl. Call

me later.”

They shared a hug before Michael disappeared back into the office. Raven sniffled and quickly wiped her tears away before standing up and walking over to him. She tried to put a positive look on her face and tone in her voice as she spoke.

“I’m sorry… that outburst was m-mean and totally unnecessary. And not helpful. She’s right, we need a game plan and everything. Where’s Alex? I want to apologize and then I can fix this.”

He perched on the edge and widened his stance so he could pull her in between his legs. His arm wrapped around her waist as he pulled her into his chest. He did not like how she braced her forearms against his chest to avoid fully melting into his embrace.

“I don’t need you to do anything and Alex doesn’t need an apology. She’s fine. I care more about whether you’re good or not. You’re upset.”

She shook her head. “I’m not upset.”

Michael raised an eyebrow. “You just called your sister an attention seeking bitch. Ain’t gon’ hear an argument from me but that’s not like you. You’re pissed, rightfully so. Tell me why though, don’t bottle that shit up.”

Raven stared at him for a moment, her mouth opening and closing a couple times as she tried to find the words to tell him. Tell him that she was near out of relentless hope and optimism, that a not-so-small part of her hated her sister and wished she never had to see her again, that she wanted to cut her and her dad out of her life completely but she wasn’t brave enough to be truly alone so she couldn’t, that a bigger part of her wanted to call TMZ and tell them all about how horrible her family has been to her her entire life, that it cut deeper than she imagined it would to read her sister describe a relationship between them that had always been her dream but she actively denied her. She wanted to tell him that she was tired, that she felt guilty and ashamed for dragging him into this mess, that she didn’t deserve his care and kindness because all she had done was ruin his life.

It was all too much, the avalanche of emotions she felt picked up speed and power with every moment she stood in his presence. And she needed it to stop, needed to throw up some type of blockade so she was not run over and drowned by it. She needed walls again, barriers. And the only way she could think to recreate those was to put both physical and emotional distance between herself and the man in front of her. He was the only person who forced her to exist in her vulnerability, to feel everything and not shy away from it. But that was dangerous. She was not built for it. Once the avalanche hit, she knew she would not get back up. So, she had to get out.

So she did the only thing she could think of, she threw up the walls of a working girl. She knew they would not hold for long, not with his persistence, but they would hold long enough for her to reign it all in again. Long enough for her to lock her feelings back up in their cage where they belonged.

“I’m not angry.” Her tone left no room for argument as she pried herself out of his embrace and walked back to the couch to grab her bag off the floor. “I’m not angry. Kiara’s not a… bad person. She’s just… Kiara’s the Sun and I imagine the Sun would be upset if Pluto tried to steal its spotlight too. She’s the center of my family’s world and she hates it when it seems like I’m trying to take that away. It’s fine. I’ll give her whatever she needs to feel like the Sun again and that I humbled myself back to my position as Pluto. Everyone wins.” She said it in such a matter-of-fact way that, if he didn’t know her, he would have missed the bitterness in her words.

“You don’t need to pretend with me, Rae. You can be upset.”

“Nothing to be upset about. This is just how it is… I’m used to it. She wants something and she knows I’m gonna give it to her. I’ll call her and figure out what she wants and we’ll fix this.”

She started to fiddle on her phone before Michael pried it out of her hand and threw it on his desk.

“I don’t give a fuck about what your sister wants right now… I care about what you need.”

“I don’t really need anything from you or anyone else right now.” Her words clipped and colder than Michael had ever heard her before. “Least of all a damn therapist.”

Her heart broke at the hurt that flashed across his eyes but she decided that was fine. She needed distance and however she achieved that, even if it was by pushing him away, it would work for her. However, before he could respond, her phone started to buzz loudly on the desk.

“Speak of the devil.” Michael handed Raven her phone back, her sister’s name popping up across the screen.

“Hey Kiara.” She put the phone on speaker phone so Michael could hear.

“I’m surprised you didn’t call me all day, I know you saw the article.”

Raven and Michael shared a knowing glance that made Michael’s blood boil. She had done this just to outshine Raven who had been in the media and tabloids multiple times in the last week from their trip. Michael had guessed that but knowing her sister went to such lengths to diminish her sister bothered him far more than he could describe. Was there no one in his girl’s life that allowed her to shine?

“Yea I saw it. I’m sure you also saw that Michael and I weren’t in the country. We just saw it when we landed about an hour ago.”

“Yea I saw you both... Why didn’t you invite me??”

Raven let out a small huff. “Do you even have a passport?”

“No… but I could’ve gotten one. it's not fair that you get to go while I’m stuck here. And with my favorite actor. All my friends sending me clips of your stories and pictures and shit. And I didn’t even know you were gonna be there. And I had to lie and tell them that you invited me but I couldn’t go. You don’t include me in shit and you keep makin’ me look fuckin’ stupid. You probably didn’t think about me once!”

“I mean no, you weren’t the first thing that came to mind when my boyfriend invited me on a trip to Paris. I’m allowed to have and enjoy experiences on my own. Also no one forced you to lie, who would have expected you to be invited on a trip with me and my boyfriend?”

She heard Kiara scoff on the other side of the phone. “‘My boyfriend,’” she mimicked back. “You better enjoy this lil 15 minutes of fame you’re getting from him cause it won’t last. Ain’t like you’re worth his time. He’ll wise up, realize he needs a real woman, a girl like me.”

“Did you want something?” Raven interrupted, turning her head from Michael so he could not see just how deeply her words cut. She would never argue that she was good enough for the man sitting next to her but hearing someone else validate those insecurities hurt.. Her sister certainly knew which wounds to cut into. “Or was your tell all just to ruin my trip?”

“Oh well… None of this would’ve happened if you had gotten me even one of the things I asked for weeks ago. Like damn, I know he’s busy but he don’t even have a real job. He could come out and met me when I asked.”

Michael’s face twisted up in a look of faux offense that would have been a perfect gif, which made the edges of Raven’s lips curl into a small smile as she stifled her laugh. How did he manage to make her smile even when she felt utterly incapable of the action?

“Acting is a real job, Kiara. And I invited you all here to meet him. But no, I wasn’t gonna ask him to get you a Birkin, I don’t even have a Birkin.”

Michael resisted the urge to cut in and ask her if she wanted one. Because he could easily have one at the house by sunset if she did.

“Dad and I can’t afford to jet set out to LA… the hotels, the food, all that shit. We’re barely getting by as it is.”

Raven rolled her eyes. “Barely getting by” when they both worked and Raven often paid most of the major bills.

As she was talking, Michael gestured for her to mute the phone. “Tell her I’ll pay for the flights and invite them to Thanksgiving.” At Raven’s wary face, Michael just nodded. “Just trust me.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize the price of the flights was the issue. H-how about we pay for the flights and your hotel and… you could come for Thanksgiving this year? Michael’s family are great cooks so it’ll be nice. And you can meet him?”

“Really?? Thanksgiving at Michael’s house?”

“Yea,” the words were almost painful to get out. Part of her wanted to believe this could be a good thing but the more logical part knew that it would not soften anything between all of them. After all, they were not coming to see her, they were coming to gawk at Michael. “But you can’t talk to the media anymore, Kiara. Seriously, you can meet him and everything but you can’t go give a tell all to TMZ or Page Six or any of them anymore. Understand?”

“Fineeeee. No more media. I’ll tell dad. Send me the flight and hotel information. Make sure to put us up somewhere nice… you know like the Ritz or a five-star hotel. And can you have a car for us while we’re there? We’re gonna wanna sightsee and everything.”

“Of course,” she muttered through gritted teeth.

“Ok. See you then, bye.”

Raven clenched her phone in her hand, resisting the urge to chuck it across the room.

“Damn, sis’s got expensive taste,” Michael muttered.

Raven’s laugh was cold and humorless. “It’s easy to have expensive taste when it’s not your money. You sure about this? Thanksgiving? Here?”

“What? Thanksgiving is the time people spend with family. We can get a nice group shot and they can feel included. And I’ll get her somethin’ expensive and nice… nothin’ crazy. That’s all she seems to want anyway. Hearing how she talks to you… I don’t want ‘em here anymore than you do but this is the best solution. You had plans or somethin’?”

“No, no… I just didn’t… I didn’t even know I was invited to the Jordan Family Thanksgiving dinner,” she chuckled, pulling at the sleeve of her jacket awkwardly.

Michael’s face twisted up in confusion. “Of course you’re invited. Moms would kill me if I didn’t. But yea I guess I should’ve asked if you had plans first. What do you usually do?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing?”

“Nothing. I order Chinese and I pick a marathon of movies to watch in bed. Same with Christmas except I usually pick a new recipe to try and I always watch the Grinch,” she chuckled.

“You spend Thanksgiving and Christmas alone?”

She shrugged and gestured toward her phone. “If you had to pick between alone and that, which would you choose?” At his silence, she nodded. “Exactly. They never want to see me anyway so I make it easy on everyone.”

“Well, this year’s gonna be different.”

Raven scoffed. “How so?”

Michael closed the distance between them and rested his hands on her hips. “Well, one, you’ll have me, which means your family will be on their best behavior. If they aren’t, two, you have me and my family as a buffer. And three, you have me… and I ain’t gon’ tolerate disrespect like that in my house. You say the word and dinner’s over.”

“You can’t kick people out of your house for me,” she whispered, her eyes avoiding the intense stare in his.

“Who says I can’t? Thought I’d made that clear by now that I’d do anything for you. And when you’re with me, I’m not just gon’ protect you physically… all of you is safe with me.”

Those walls she threw up? Already starting to crash down around her. Why does he do this to me?? And why can’t I resist it? She thought to herself as she looked at him.

“Thank you. But hopefully, they’ll be on their best behavior and then who knows, maybe they’ll see your family and want to turn a new leaf? This could be good?” In her heart, she knew that would not be how this particular story played out but she had to try… had to hope and dream that it could be different. She studied him for a sign that he agreed, and believed her. But he offered her nothing but a peck on the forehead.

“Yea, maybe.”

They stood there for a moment before Raven felt the overwhelming urge to run again. She hated this feeling… the contrasting emotions of wanting to melt into him and run from him at full speed.

“D-do you think Allen would mind taking me home?”

“I thought you were gonna stay with me tonight?”

“Yea but I thought we were going to the condo… you want me to stay the night… here?”

“I just thought after last week…” he stopped himself. “Here is just more comfortable than the condo. Besides, ma asked if you could stay for dinner so she can meet you. Wouldn’t want to disappoint her, would you?” At her continued expression of speculation, Michael added. “She also has been buggin’ the hell outta me to meet you so honestly, you’d be savin’ my ass.”

Raven smiled and nodded. There was not anything but wallowing and frustration waiting for her back at her own apartment. And she had loved falling asleep in Michael’s arms during the last week. She was not ready to fall asleep alone again.

“Just remember that next time you’re punishing me,” she winked at him.

“Deal.”

***

“Bakari!” Donna called over to Michael who was standing outside with his dad overseeing the fried turkey for dinner.

“What’s up, ma?” He jogged over to her as she continued moving around the kitchen. Michael had offered, as he did every year, to have dinner catered but his mother could not dream of not cooking Thanksgiving dinner with her own two hands. Michael never pressed too hard though because he knew no caterer would ever beat his mom and dad’s cooking.

“I think a certain girl needs your attention more than your father and that turkey,” she gestured toward Raven whose hands were filled with neatly folded napkins as she sat each one on each place setting around their giant farm style table.

Michael’s eyes scanned over her body. He could see the tension in her shoulders but she had been tense since they woke up that morning. She had also been quiet all day, simply getting up and heading down to the kitchen to assist his mother. While she was more than happy for the help and it gave the two a chance to chat and bond, Michael knew Raven’s motives were not completely altruistic. She needed the distraction.

“She’s setting the table, what’s wrong?”

His mother lowered her voice. “She’s set and reset that table 5 times now in between asking me if I need help 100 times and apologizing for her family being late.” She gestured toward the pitcher which held a fall sangria for dinner. “Poor girl’s been on her feet helpin’ me all day and she’s a dream but she needs to relax. Pour her a drink, get her outta my kitchen, and make her sit down till dinner, please?”

“Yes ma’am.” He kissed his mom on the cheek before quickly grabbing a glass and pouring a tall drink before walking over to her.

“I think those napkins will be fine wherever you put them, baby girl,” he whispered in her ear, causing Raven to jump slightly.

She clutched her chest, glancing down at the table setting and set of napkins in her hand. “Sorry… was in my own head. Something about it still doesn’t look right still,” she whispered as she started to rearrange the setting in front of her again.

Michael eyed her for a moment before grabbing the things out of her hand and setting them down. He called for his sister to take over setting the table before grabbing Raven’s hand and pulling her behind him into his bedroom upstairs. He closed the door and handed her the glass.

“Drink.” He instructed.

Raven took a sip before lowering the glass again to hand back to him.

“Nope, drink the whole thing and then tell me why you’re so scared.”

“I’m not scared.”

“Yea you are. Tell me why.” Michael wasn’t dumb. Raven had been off since her family landed in LA, more tense, quieter and not herself. He wished he could get the version of her from Paris back but that woman was buried deep beneath the seemingly never-ending bull her family put her through.

Raven took another big gulp of the drink before sitting on the edge of Michael’s bed, her dress riding up her bare thighs slightly. His eyes sparked with lust but he tempered himself. That was not the point of bringing her up here.

“I’m not… scared. That’s not what it is. I just… Well, first, I’m frustrated because they’re late. I explicitly told them 2 so they could meet everyone and chat and mingle and it’s almost 4. I spent over an hour on that damn charcuterie board. And they haven’t called me or texted or anything. And now your mom probably thinks I was raised by inconsiderate ass wolves.”

“Rae, my mom doesn’t care in the slightest. Food wasn’t gonna be done at 2 anyway so they haven’t missed anything or messed up anything. And you know that. So what’s really bothering you? We aren’t leaving this room til you tell me.”

She sucked her teeth in annoyance before sighing. She knew he would make good on his promise not to let her leave until she was honest.

“I’ve lived in LA for years. Did my masters out here, became a published author here, built a life here and you know how many times I’ve asked them to visit? And the first time they come, it's not even to see me. It’s to meet you. They’ve been in LA for 3 whole days… you know they haven’t made an effort to see me once? Never mind the fact that every restaurant they have a reservation to, we booked. Every excursion, you booked and paid for. And it shouldn’t bother me,” she whispered, throwing the entire drink back before wiping the corner of her lips. “It shouldn’t… bother me. Usually it doesn’t bother me. After all, this’s been it, my whole life. But since I met your family… I see how you are with them a-and I spend time with you all and it’s like breathing in rare fresh air? A-and I dunno, it just… the polluted air is a lot harder to breathe in than it used to be.”

Since they returned from Paris, Raven had become a staple in the Jordan household. They still returned to the condo some nights after dates as it was often easier than getting back to his mansion in the hills. Raven had fallen in love with Michael’s family and it seemed his family had taken quite a liking to her as well. His nephew loved to have Raven read to him as she did the best silly voices, and she, his mom, and sister had already gone out without Michael for manis, pedis, and dinner - with his card, of course.

Raven would never forget their first dinner the night they got back from Paris. She had been in such a bad mood but ten minutes at the table with Michael’s entire family had lightened her spirits significantly. His dad was charming and told stories that had Raven’s muscles aching from laughter; his mom so sweet and spent half the dinner asking questions about Raven’s book after having it finished it while they were away; his brother was quiet but he and Michael’s friendship made her heart want to melt; and his sister was witty and made Raven want to be her friend immediately. Everytime Raven spent time with them, they made her feel like part of the family. And she fell into it, despite her efforts to avoid it, with ease, like she had been part of the fabric for years. It caused some guilt to swell as she remembered that the girl they loved so much was a lie and that she and Michael were deceiving them. However, as her own family continued to disappoint her, it was nice to be a part of something so pure and loving.

“Sorry to interrupt,” Michael’s sister poked her head into the room. “But your family’s car just pulled up.”

Raven immediately stood up and handed the wine glass back to Michael. She went over to the full-length mirror in his room to adjust her outfit and ensure she looked perfect before putting on the most forced smile Michael had ever seen grace her lips.

“Come on, we shouldn’t keep them waiting.”

Michael grabbed her arm to stop her as she tried to walk around him.

“I told myself I’d stay out of it… your family, your rules. But word of advice, if you’ll let me?” When she said nothing, he continued. “People treat you how you allow them. And just because you’ve allowed this disregard for 30 years doesn’t mean you have to allow it now or that you deserve it. It hurts more now because you know you deserve more. And you’ve experienced more. So demand more.”

“And if they don’t give it?” Raven’s voice broke slightly with that question because she knew what his answer would be, what she should have done many years ago but did not have the courage to do.

“Somethin’ isn’t always better than nothin’. Especially when that somethin’ is just dead weight you have to drag around behind you. No one ever got far with dead weight.” He pressed his lips to her forehead, Raven desperately wanting to melt into him and the comfort he provided. He laced his fingers in hers and kissed her hand. “That’s all I’m gonna say. We’re gonna have a good time, promise. You’re with me so you know I gotchu. You ready?”

“Yea, I think so,” she smiled at him before following him out of his room and downstairs.

As they descended the stairs, she was unsurprised to find the deep baritone of her father filling the foyer of Michael’s mansion as he greeted everyone. Raven fixed her face to maintain a smile as she and Michael finally made it to the bottom of the stairs. She could feel her sister’s eyes studying her, taking in her designer dress, the signature red bottoms of her heels, and the diamond necklace and earrings glistening against her skin that Michael had bought her in Paris. It may have been a role, but Raven could not lie, she enjoyed dressing the part of a movie star’s girlfriend more than she thought she would. A petty part of her also did not hate the way her sister’s nose seemed to flare with jealousy at it.

“How y’all doin? I’m Michael?” Michael stepped forward and offered her father and sister a hug.

Raven’s eyes narrowed as her sister tried to linger in the very chaste hug Michael offered. Neither of them acknowledged her as they introduced themselves to Michael and his family, Raven awkwardly teetering on her heels behind him.

“It’s so great to meet you, son. Loved that Tom Clancy movie of yours. Watch it all the time,” her dad boasted as if he was Michael’s greatest fan.

Raven rolled her eyes behind Michael, knowing how much he hated when the first thing out of someone’s mouth when he meets them is their favorite role of his.

“Thank you, thank you. That was a fun one.” Michael reached behind him and pulled Raven to his side. He protectively tucked her under his arm and smiled down at her. “Great girl you have here.”

“Hey dad,” Raven offered, stepping forward to accept the half hug her father offered. She knew it was merely for show but she accepted it anyway. “Kiara,” her tone made her seem far more excited to see both of them than she was. But unlike her family, she was painfully aware of the studious eyes of Michael’s family watching them. And while their foundation had cracks the size of the Grand Canyon in it, she did not want Michael’s family to see them.

Her sister could not even stop eye fucking Michael long enough to give her a hug. She merely nodded in her direction.

Michael, thankfully, ended the awkward silence between the family members by gesturing for everyone to follow him to the kitchen. There, the island was heavily laden with food that his mom deemed ready to serve. Everyone grabbed serving dishes and started helping move things to the table. Seeing an opportunity to grab her father and her sister, Raven pulled them off to the side for a moment while Michael’s family got ready for dinner.

There was an awkward silence as the three of them stood in Michael’s living room before Raven found her voice again. She did not know why she was nervous, this was her family after all.

“Just wanted to see how the trip’s going? A-and ask if y’all had plans tomorrow. Thought maybe, you could come see my apartment? And then maybe we could go hiking to the Hollywood sign, it’s such a nice view of the city. And Michael got us all reservations at a new Japanese spot tomorrow night.”

Kiara turned her nose up at the mere idea. “Hiking?? No. Dad’s taking me shopping tomorrow on Rodeo Drive. It’ll probably take up the whole day, sorry. But dinner with Michael sounds good.”

Raven’s heart deflated a bit. Another outstretched hand pushed away. “Oh… yea of course. Shopping sounds fun. Maybe I could meet you all?”

“That’s ok. We know you’re busy,” her dad interjected, waving his hand to dismiss her suggestion.

“Oh… well, it’s just… you leave Saturday, I wanted to spend some time with y’all before you leave? I tried calling you both, I haven’t seen you all week. I invited you all out here, thought we’d get to at least spend a little time together before you leave.”

“We’re spending time together right now. We’ve been really busy. We came to meet Michael and enjoy the city. That’s what we’ve been doing. Besides, we all know Michael paid for us to come, not you.”

Raven scoffed, already frustrated and they had not been there for more than 5 minutes. She regretted everything about this plan. Her time with Michael’s family, this sanctuary she had found with them in his home, now felt tainted as if their mere presence had poisoned that sweet, fresh air. She knew she should have been more excited to see them, after all, it had been longer than she could remember since she saw them in the flesh. But now, that small part of her that never wanted to see them again only seemed to get larger and larger with every moment she stood in their presence.

Why do you even bother?

“Oh, should I start itemizing everything I’ve paid for in the last decade? Is that the best way to get yall to, you know, actually care to spend time with me? I mean I’ve been asking y’all to come out this way for years. I just thought… since we haven’t really seen each other in a while, this could be a good chance to reconnect. But shopping is more important than me, everything seems to be,” she muttered more to herself than to them. Before her sister could cut in with another smart comment, Raven added. “Can you make sure to thank Michael for this trip you’re enjoying so much? He really went all out of y’all.”

“You don’t need to lecture me on good manners, Raven. I did raise you both,” her father spoke up, clearly annoyed and bored of this conversation.

Raven bit down the retort that she was not sure please and thank you were even phrases in their vocabulary and just nodded.

“Is that all?” her sister asked cooly.

“Yea, yea that’s all.”

Both of them immediately left to return to the dining room where Michael’s family gathered, leaving Raven in the living room. She let out a deep shaky breath as a welcomed face popped out around the corner. However, she cringed slightly, fearful that he heard that entire exchange.

She walked over to him, Michael immediately pulling her into a tight embrace. Her head thudded against his chest. “Please tell me you didn’t hear any of that.”

“Don’t think me lying to you is gonna make you feel any better.” His fingers brushed aside the curls that spilled into her face. .

His hand rubbed soothing circles into her back before he kissed her on the top of her head. This time Raven did not even attempt to shy away, she fully melted into his embrace, at least as much as she could without breaking down.

“Say the word and they’re gone,” he reminded her, leaning back so he could look in her eyes.

Raven could tell he was completely serious, that he would kick both of them out without a second thought or a care. However, she knew that was not a possibility.

“As much as I hate it, we need them, remember?” She sighed. “For once, I do actually need them. So I’m gonna do what I’ve always done.”

“And what’s that?”

She shrugged, pulling herself out of his embrace. “Suffer through it.” She answered simply.

“Anything I can do to help?”

“Keep my glass full,” she answered bluntly. “I can already tell it’s gonna be a long fucking afternoon.”

***

“So Kiara, what do you do?” Donna asked as she sat down from transitioning the dinner dishes out and replacing them with dessert.

Raven did not know how she was going to eat the slice of apple pie Michael cut for her. Everything had been so delicious, she had eaten two plates and would have gotten a third if her sister had not made a backhanded, loud compliment about her food and her figure. While she could count the number of plates she had eaten with ease, the same could not be said for the glasses of sangria.

She had not lied when she said she needed it. Tipsy Raven cared far less about her sister’s consistent jabs to make her feel inferior and puff herself up to Michael nor did she care about how her father objectively ignored her for the entire dinner. He talked of her and around her but not once did he direct a question or comment to her. She could not tell which slight bothered her more, the disrespect or the disregard.

“I was doing hair for a while but I really love to cook so I’m going back to school to be a chef.”

Everyone around the table offered the appropriate congratulations and well wishes while Raven merely smiled and stopped herself from rolling her eyes. Kiara changed career paths about as often as she changed boyfriends, which was damn near monthly. Being a chef was just another way to throw her dad and Raven’s money down the toilet.

“Once I finish school, maybe you can float some clients my way? My dream is to be a personal chef.”

Raven downed her glass before filling it again. She found that drinking was the only way to stop herself from commenting on everything they did that frustrated her. However, that was an incredibly foolish drinking game to play. Because everything they did today seemed to frustrate her, every slight seemed amplified now that it was in the presence of Michael and his family. Each one fueled that anger she often ignored and suppressed. She should have known this was coming, that they would try to ask him for favors. She didn’t even ask him for favors. All they did was take and it was one thing to do that to her, but Michael did not deserve it.

You don’t deserve it either, a small voice that sounded oddly like the man sitting next to her reminded her.

“Maybe finish school first before you start chatting up my man for clients,” Raven teased, keeping her tone light and playful though she knew Kiara could see the lack of amusement in her eyes.

“Well, we all gotta start somewhere right? Can’t all be big time like you, sis?”

Raven smiled, “Well, you can be if you work hard… and don't rely on boyfriends, dad and I for everything,” she added the last part under her breath, however, she knew her sister could hear her. Michael’s hand went to rest of her thigh as if he could sense the change in her demeanor and mood almost immediately.

“Oh we loved Raven’s book,” Donna offered, transitioning the conversation away from her sister. “Such a talented and vivid writer. I probably talked the poor girl’s ear off when we first met about it. Was she always like that?”

Raven’s dad chuckled. “Yea she always had her nose buried in a book or a notebook writing somethin. She used to write these little short stories, got a drawer full of ‘em back at the house.”

“That’s so sweet. I’m not much of a fantasy reader,” Donna admitted. “But she had me hooked from the first chapter. Such a beautiful story.”

“Yea the book was really great,” he added lamely, unable to offer much beyond that because, as Raven knew, he had not read her book. “I always encouraged them both to follow their dreams, great to see her accomplish so much.”

Something about hearing him talk about her passion, her life’s work, the thing she tolled and fought for and had to give up, as if he cared about it at all made all those years of suppressed rage finally boil over. She could suffer through a lot, it was true, but she could not listen to that, listen to him lie and pretend to be supportive or caring when he was nothing of the sort. And now, she did not even care who knew it. This was simply not a piece of fiction she would allow him to sell.

“What was your favorite part of the book, dad?” Raven had not said much throughout dinner, allowing her sister to monopolize most of the conversation. However, it seemed as though Michael was the only person who realized the unfortunate turn their Thanksgiving dinner was about to take. He leaned in closer to her, quietly whispering in her ear but he knew his sweet nothings meant just that at this point: nothing. She was too far gone to hear them or register them. Her body felt as if it was almost vibrating with rage. He wished he could take her outside and give her a few plates to smash but he knew his mom would not appreciate that.

“Oh all of it. Whole thing was great.”

“Huh…” she muttered, taking a long gulp of her drink before reaching for the pitcher to refill it. “Who’s your favorite character?”

“Maybe we should slow down on…” Michael quietly whispered in her ear, subtly trying to beat her to the pitcher but she grabbed it first and poured another large glass. She raised her hand to stop his sentence.

“Didn’t realize there’d be a pop quiz,” he let out a deep chuckle as the tension around the table grew to levels that were impossible to ignore.

“Not a pop quiz. Just tell me one thing about the book you loved so much and encouraged me to write. Favorite plot twist, favorite scene, favorite character… hell, name one character you remember at all?”

“What the fuck, Rae? What’s your problem?”

Raven let out a humorless laugh as she leaned back in her seat. She downed her entire drink in one go, sitting the glass down before folding her arms casually.

“What’s my problem? What’s my problem? Right now, my problem is this fiction you’re spinning as if you give a rat’s ass about my book, my career, or me when if someone put a gun to your head, you wouldn’t be able to tell them the name of my book, let alone anything about it. My problem is the fact that I invited you all here to spend time with me, my boyfriend, and his family, all for you to ignore me for most of dinner. My problem is that you wax poetic about stories I wrote as a kid when, if you had ever bothered to read a single one of them, you would have seen a child writing herself into literally any other world and family to escape the pitiful one she had. I have a lot of problems, too many to list right now. But the common denominator in all of them is you two.”

Everyone’s movements and side conversations halted at her outburst. The silence and her deep breaths were only interrupted by Michael’s brother accidentally dropping his fork against his dinner china, the loud clanging filling everyone’s ears as they stared at Raven and her father.

She was not one to start a scene or draw attention to herself. But she could not let any of this go on for another moment.

“Baby… why don’t we take a break for a minute?” Michael asked, standing to pull her chair out. Raven knew that if she sat there for a minute longer, she’d lose whatever little composure she had left, so she forced herself to heed Michael’s advice. She wiped her lips and immediately threw her napkin down on the table to stand and leave.

“Excuse me.”

However, as she turned around, she heard her father’s voice.

“I didn’t mean to cause an issue. I tried my best with her and Kiara but you know, some kids are just harder to handle than others.”

As soon as those words hit her ears, she exploded. Before she even realized it, she had returned to the table and was leaning over it yelling at her father.

“‘You tried your best??’ YOU TRIED YOUR BEST? You never tried! All you’ve done is give the bare minimum and suffer through my presence like I’m was a fuckin’ pest you couldn’t get rid of!”

“You think you can talk to me that way? I’m still your father! All I’ve ever done is love you and take care of you.”

Raven scoffed, throwing her hands in the air. Michael shifted so he was standing behind her, an arm wrapped around her waist as if to stop her from jumping across the table. It was not that he thought she would actually do anything, baby girl did not seem like the scrapping type. But he prayed his presence would calm her down if nothing else. This was a side of her he had never seen before. He could not lie, it was kinda sexy, seeing her finally stick up for herself and be assertive.

In a part of her brain that felt distant and detached, she could feel Michael’s presence, hear his soft whispers to calm down. And she knew and appreciated what he was trying to do: stop her from doing something she’d ultimately regret. But at that moment, she did not know if she wanted to be stopped.

“All you’ve ever done is give me scraps! Scraps of support, scraps of your attention, but not an ounce of your love or affection. All to punish me for the sin of being born.” She had always bought into her family’s narrative that she was to blame for what happened. But it was as if the small voice that nagged at her her entire life was finally roaring. This was not her fault. No part of it was. “You can’t be mad at God for that shitty situation and you won’t be mad at mom for making her choice. So for 30 years, I’ve endured you hating me because you needed someone to be mad at. When you ignored birthday after birthday and accomplishment after accomplishment and need after need, I persisted in trying to win your love and win your affection. When you threw me out and cut me off after one year of college, I dusted myself off and kept going. When you rebuffed every attempt to reconnect and build a new relationship, I kept reaching out, kept trying. When you ignored me on every holiday and at every visit and everything, I still showed up. And when you ask for everything I have despite not deserving a cent of it, I give it. Every single time. Even after I lost my book deal last year and my career and didn’t know how I was gonna pinch pennies together for rent, I put myself and my needs last to help you two every single fuckin’ time. And you both expect me to be gracious for scraps while I kill myself to give you the Sun, Moon and stars and you take and you take and you take without so much as a thank you.” Every ‘take’ punctured by her hand slamming down on the farm-style dining table. “It’s not enough and I refuse to spend the next 30 years pretending it is. I’m done!”

“God, you’re such an embarrassment,” Kiara muttered.

“Oh fuck you, Kiara!” She cried out. “You miserable, attention-seeking bitch. You can say whatever you want about me but unlike you, I made something of my life and I did it all on my own. Meanwhile, you float through life without a single responsibility or thing to your name that someone else didn’t give you. And you can’t stand the fact that my life, despite both of your best efforts, is better than yours.”

“Wow. Nice to know how you really feel about your family.”

��I’ve never had a family. You both made damn sure of that. You want me out of your lives so bad? Fine. I’m out. Let’s see how far both of you get without taking from me. Get out. Both of you.”

Raven had no authority to kick someone out of a house that was not even hers but she could not hope to care. She knew Michael would not argue with her or lobby for them to stay after she just cussed them out six ways to Sunday in front of his entire family.

“You can’t kick us out!”

“Yes she can,” Michael piped up, speaking for the first time since the blow up began.

The intense stare down continued before her father and sister angrily stood up and stalked to the door.

“And Kiara!” Her sister stopped walking to turn around to her. “Say another word about me or my relationship to the media and I won’t hesitate to tell this entire world what a shitty person and sister you are. See how your friends like that story then.”

Her sister merely glared at her before stomping out of the house behind their father. As soon as she heard the door shut, Raven felt the adrenaline in her system crash and the weight of what just happened set in.

What the fuck did you just do? And in front of Michael’s family?

She let out a shaky breath as a wave of shame hit her. “U-Um… I am… I am s-so so so sorry,” she whispered. She rang her hands together, unable to make eye contact with anyone in the room. She had not felt this embarrassed in a long time. “I-I should go too.” She pulled herself away from Michael and tried to race toward the door, ignoring his calls for her to stay. However, before she could leave the dining room, Michael’s mom stopped her.

She grabbed the young woman’s hands and patted them softly.

“No, no you aren’t. No one leaves my table till dessert is over. You’re gonna sit and finish your pie with family.”

The tears brimming in Raven’s eyes spilled over.

“I-I’m sorry for r-ruining dinner.”

The older woman laughed. “That ain’t the first blow up this family’s seen at a dinner table… won’t be the last. Go on and sit down.”

She steered Raven’s body back into Michael’s arms who pulled back her chair for her to sit. She ate her pie in silence, conversation flowing with ease around her. The Jordans acted as if her meltdown was just par the course, though she knew they were likely just trying to make her feel better. But still, she appreciated it. Within 15 minutes of eating dessert, the mood across the table felt lighter and easier than it had all day. Raven calmed down enough to laugh and joke. By the end of several rounds of drinks and a very rowdy spades game to cap off the evening, Raven’s heart and soul also felt lighter than they had in years.

However, that quickly ended when she and Michael finally retreated to his suite for the evening. She collapsed onto the edge of his bed and kicked off her shoes, her movements sluggish and slow as if the weight of what she had done was finally creeping on her now that she was alone.

“I’m… alone,” she whispered to herself.

“What?” Michael crouched down in front of her, her eyes misting over slightly as she realized the truth.

“I’ve always been alone for the most part… after my grandma died. And I couldn’t keep a relationship going for long ever. It’s always just been… me. But it was ok because even though they were awful, I still had… family a-and there was still hope that it could be something. But now… now I have no one cause they’ll never come around after what I said to them.” She rubbed her eyes with the palm of her hand. “I don’t regret it, I was holding on to something that just wasn’t ever gonna be anything. But the dead weight was… something? Didn’t expect how empty I’d feel without it.” She sniffled and wiped her eyes. “It’s stupid,” she whispered. “Sorry.” She cleared her throat and stood up to walk to his bathroom. “Give me a minute to get my life together and then we can do what you actually pay me for and not this sad shit.”

Michael watched as she dapped her eyes in the mirror to rid them of tears before she reached behind her and pulled down the zipper of her dress. She looked gorgeous, her body clad in another one of her lingerie sets from Paris. This one was a nude brown that perfectly matched her skin. He knew she was merely trying to use sex to move on and forget, and he would oblige. But he could not do so without saying one thing.

“You have me.” It was not a question, but a firm statement. A matter of fact statement that left no room for arguments or questions.

Raven’s hands paused as she tried to fix her hair for a few minutes. She turned and smiled at him, closing the distance between them.

“Yea I have you… But this’ll end and you’ll find the right girl for you and then…”she shook her head, not wanting to think about that: being alone or being without him. “Thank you… for today.”

She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his. Usually, Michael initiated their kisses and they were domineering, hurried and passionate. While this moment held the same passion, it was slow and measured, each second inching past them. And Raven used every second to convey what her simple thank you could not. She prayed he felt it and appreciated it, because at that moment, the small action was all she had left to give. She did not have the energy for grand speeches or words.

She broke off their kiss and slid down to her knees, assuming the same position she did almost every time they had sex.

However, tonight, Michael decided he needed something different, that she needed something different. His finger gently lifted her chin so her eyes were on him.

“You take care of me every time we have sex. Let me take care of you for once.”

He did not let her question it as he helped her to her feet and led her to his bed, gently pushing her down. She let out a dramatic huff that made him chuckle.

He stood over her for a moment, his eyes taking in the hills of her breasts, the soft panes of her stomach, her thick plush thighs. He often found himself just staring at her and this moment was no different, moments where he wanted to commit her beauty to memory, burn her image in his brain matter.

“You are fuckin’ gorgeous,” he whispered. “You know how beautiful you are?” he asked as he sucked on the skin of her neck.

She turned her head, giving him more access to the skin of her neck as he sucked and bit. She whimpered slightly as his kisses moved down her body, savoring the taste of her soft supple skin. He took his time, however, this felt completely different than when he teased her. Then, he was purposefully avoiding giving her what she wanted. Now, her moans created the roadmap he followed. His lips and hands lingered where she needed them to, only pausing to shower her with praises. As his kisses continued, Raven lost all control of her senses, of the world around her. Everything else, the pain and emotions of the day faded away as every thought in her mind and every cell in her physical body turned their focus on him.

“I love everything about you. The way you moan, the way you beg me for more, the face you make when I make you cum.”

“Michael, please,” she whimpered.

He paused his ministrations and grasped her chin with a featherlike touch, her eyes focusing on him.

“I’m gonna take care you, I promise. Always. Trust me.” He hoped that the look in his eyes conveyed the truth, that her pleasure was not the only part of her he would take care of. He would worship and care for her mind, body, and spirit.

His fingers hooked into her lace panties and slid them off, settling between her plush thighs for his favorite meal of the day. Her eyes clenched shut as he spelled his adoration and love for her with his tongue on her clit. Michael had always been a generous lover but river always bent toward his pleasure. Every action, while it brought her pleasure, carried the reminder that it was not for her pleasure, it was for his. And she loved it, craved it, got off on it. It was one of the benefits of the arrangement to her.

But it had been so long since she had had sex like this, where the river flowed toward her and only her, where someone was so committed to bringing her mind numbing pleasure and ensuring she knew she was cared for and safe. She knew why he was doing it, after seeing how unsafe she was with her own family. She knew it was not real but she could not close the gates to her heart fast enough and stop herself from feeling it, from enjoying it. Every touch was gentle and sweet and let her know she was safe in his arms, safe in his sanctuary. And even though she knew she could not stay there with him forever, she loved him even more for letting her in from the cold for a moment.

Michael’s eyes never left her face as he devoured her, every moan, groan, and plea for mercy spurred him on. Her thighs clamped around his head as he pushed her farther and farther up her mountain to the peak of desire. He knew Raven’s body almost as well as he knew his own now, increasing his speed and efforts when he felt her legs shake and heard her moans grow louder.

It did not take much longer for Raven to feel the snap of a powerful orgasm crash over her. She let out a continuous stream of praise and lewd words as she road those waves of sweet bliss.

“That’s it, baby. Cum for me. Fuck, you taste so good.” He emerged from between her legs, kissing her deeply.

He wrapped his arm around her waist and used his strength to hoist her farther up onto the bed. He placed her legs on his shoulders and lined himself up with her entrance. Raven offered him a raised eyebrow at the position choice, she could not remember the last time they did missionary on the bed like this. On creative surfaces, like tables? Sure.

“I wanna look you in the eye when I make you cum. Keep your eyes on me, baby,” he whispered, Raven’s heart’s fluttering as she felt him fill her to the brim.

“Fuckkkk,” she cried out as he drove into her deeply. Every stroke felt like heaven, a promised land he was so graciously sending her to. There was a vulnerability to the position that she had not expected, the way he looked at her with every thrust forward and retreat.

“Look at me.” He demanded as her eyes fluttered closed. As soon as her eyes were trained on his, he uttered three words Raven never would have thought to hear from his lips. “I love you.”

Raven was rendered speechless, her moans catching in her throat as she felt her stomach drop 100 stories.

Did he say what I think he said? She thought to herself, her brain trying to cut through layers of pleasure fog to work properly.

“You deserve the entire world, Rae. You deserve someone who’ll give you this world… the sun, the moon, and the stars. And I don’t deserve you, I don’t deserve this. But I’ll spend everything I have, I’ll give everything I am to make sure you got it. I want more than an arrangement and six months with you… I want you, all of you, for as long as you’ll allow me.”

His words directly clashed with the narrative she had in her mind, the seeds of doubt life and her family had sowed. And despite her heart begging her to scream the words back at him, those doubts stopped her. She heard his words but she did not believe them or rather, she could not believe them.

She did love him, she was so in love with him. It was a devastating, beautiful, painful, once-in-a-lifetime sort of love she thought she would only read in the pages of love stories. But she felt it… every devastatingly beautiful moment of it every time she was in his presence, every time she felt his touch, every time he comforted her or looked into her eyes.

But the words, those three precious words, were stuck in her throat. A barrier of fear and doubt, made even heavier by the events of the day, weighed them down. Instead of celebrating that the man she so desperately loved felt the same about her, she could only focus on how that just could not simply be true. The story she had built in her mind that she was not good enough, that she did not deserve him, that he could never love her, a part of her brain clung to it as a lifeline. She had given Michael this grand speech about living and falling but she could not do it herself. Because if she gave in and allowed him to love her, truly love her, and then this was all a lie? That was the crash she did not think she could survive. She could handle her family hurting her. It knocked her down but she could always get back up again. But Michael? He would be her armageddon. If he hurt her, she would not get back up again.

The avalanche was hurling toward her once again, only this time she was standing at the bottom without a barrier or way to outrun it. She was mere feet away from being swept up by it and all the emotion and vulnerability it brought in its wake. The day had just been too much, too heavy. And emotionally, she had not been prepared for any of the twists and turns the day had brought. She suddenly felt overwhelmed, so out of control of everything, particularly her emotions, the one thing she usually had under control.

She felt tears sting the back of her eyes but she knew they were not good tears, the tears Michael usually induced during sex. No, these were entirely different. She quickly realized she needed a break, a moment. And the only thing in this world that she could control in this particular moment was the man above her. He was the catalyst every single time, the cannon blast that started the avalanche, that forced her to feel everything all at once. And she needed that to stop. She needed him to stop.

“Wakanda…” she choked out, her voice as broken and small as she felt.

She did not have a chance to repeat it as Michael immediately stopped his movements in mid stroke, his face stricken and concerned.

“Shit.” He slid out of her without a second thought and braced himself over her, shocked to find tears streaming down her face, her body trembling. He immediately grabbed the blanket that was hanging half off the bed, wrapping her nude form tightly in it. “Hey, hey. You’re ok, you’re ok. You’re having a panic attack. Deep breaths for me.”

Raven curled into a small ball under the blanket, gasping for breath. Michael pressed her hand into his chest.

“Focus on me, baby girl. That’s it. Deep breaths.”

She closed her eyes and focused on the faint thumps of his heart in his chest, the way it rose and fell against her hand as she tried to sync up her breathing to his. He held tightly to her hand as she took long deep breaths. It felt like hours passed before either of them moved, before she felt calm enough to speak, but she knew it had likely only been a few minutes.

“First a concussion,” she wiped her tears. “And now, a panic attack. I must be the worst woman you’ve ever had sex with,” she let out a watery chuckle.

“Or the best?” he offered in a voice so gentle and quiet, it made a new set of tears well up in her eyes. She did not deserve him. “What happened? Did I hurt you?”

She shook her head. “N-no, you d-didn’t. I j-just couldn’t… you can’t look at me l-like that o-or keep doing stuff l-like this. Pretending you love me just to make me feel b-better.” She shook her head rapidly. “I know you feel obligated to be g-gentle and shit when I’m having a bad day. But i-it’s just confusing. I know t-this isn’t real a-and I c-cant take anyone else pretending to love me or care about me when they r-really don’t.”

“I’ve never done anything for you that I didn’t want to do, Raven. I’m not kind and gentle with you because I feel obligated. I’m kind and gentle because I want to be, because you deserve it. Do you find yourself so undeserving of all these things that it is that hard to believe that I’m in love with you? That I do all this shit for you because this is real to me??”

“There’s no way that is true! You don’t love me!” She argued.

“Yes I do!”

Raven wanted to pull her hair out and scream at him. “Stop saying that! W-we are just fantasies to each other, Michael! P-playing a role that the other needs filled and j-just because the fantasy is nice, doesn’t mean I should kid myself into believing it is real. You’ll toss me aside as soon as this agreement is done because everything you feel is based on a fantasy!”

“You aren’t some fantasy to me, Raven!”

“Fine! Not a fantasy! But everything we are is conditional… even you have to admit that. I mean we have a fuckin’ contract! Everything we are is based on me fulfilling those conditions! You can dress me up like a girlfriend but I know what I am when the cameras go away, Michael. I’m the girl you met in a hotel who was paid to fuck you!”

He jumped off the bed and grabbed his phone, thrusting it into her hand. “Robert Pearson. Call him.”

“W-who is that?” she asked, completely bewildered by the change in the conversation.

“He’s one of the top reporters at TMZ. Call him, call him right now and tell him this whole thing is a fuckin’ sham. Hell, want me to start an Instagram live for you so you can tell the whole fucking world? I’ll do it.”

She threw the phone back on the bed and stood up, wrapping the blanket around her like a dress. “I’m not gonna fucking call anyone or do that!”

“But you could! That’s my point! You could call TMZ right now and tell him this whole thing was a sham, sell a fuckin’ tell all and I’d still love you. I’d honestly thank you for it because then I wouldn’t have to pretend I only love you because of some arrangement. I could admit that I love you for you. I love you for your vulnerability, your spirit, the fact that you give and you give and expect nothing in return and don’t even stop giving all of yourself when everyone else would. I love that you talk in fuckin’ sonnets and monologues. I love your relentless optimism and hope. I love your smile, the way you can’t look someone in the eye when they compliment you but it lights up your entire being. I love that you’ve got a wild imagination and you're quirky and funny and…” he threw his hands up in the air. “I. Love. You. I am in love with you. You can keep telling me to stop saying it, you can ignore it, pretend you don’t hear it, you can reject it. But it won’t change it. I love you. No conditions, no expectations. Just you for you. The question is do you love me?” he demanded.

“It’s not that simple!” She tried to move around him but he blocked her way. She needed to get out of her, needed to escape this chaos. “Move, Michael.”

“No! It is that simple. Do you love me? Forget everythin’ else. What you think you do and don’t deserve. Do. You. Love. Me?”

“Of course, I fuckin’ love you!” she cried out. “I fell in love with you the morning I woke up with a concussion and you were sitting in my hospital room. I love you! But t-there’s… no one loves me like that. What you’re claiming to feel… no one feels that for me a-and there’s no way that you, a man who could get any one of the billions of women on this planet, would be the first. There’s no way you would settle for loving me.” She let out a deep sigh. “A-and my heart can’t take it… I can’t take the rejection and pain from people I love who don’t love me back anymore. I c-can’t. Which means I can’t believe that you love me. I’ve taken all I can take a-and if I accept that you love me, then I risk you rejecting o-or hurting me. And when you do, it’ll kill me.” The last word hung in the air as she sank down to the floor by his bed, her head buried in her hands.

Michael settled down on the floor next to her, his hand grasping hers as he intertwined their fingers. There was so much to unpack in her words, so much that he knew he would not be able to convince her of or solve in one night. But there was one thing he knew he could assure her of right then and there.

“There were a hundred ways I could’ve spun what happened between us that first night, hundreds of ways I could’ve dealt with you that would not have led us to this moment. But I chose the road I chose, not so I could have a body to use or fix a crisis. But because you stole my soul the moment you turned around in that hotel room. Loving you isn’t fuckin’ settling, it’s everythin’ I’ve wanted for damn near a decade but didn’t think I could have again. We’ve been standing on the edge of this cliff, waiting for the other to be ready to jump for months now. And I’m ready and you’re holdin’ on for dear fuckin’ life. I’m askin’ you to let go and trust that I won’t hurt you. I know that’s scary… shit I’m scared too. But I’m willing to jump if you are.” His thumb wiped away her falling tears before kissing her on the forehead. “I’m not lookin’ for an answer tonight, love. I know today… this week’s been a lot for you. I didn’t mean to add another thing on top of all the other shit, I just… needed you to know how I felt.”

“Don’t… don’t apologize. I-I j-just got overwhelmed b-by everything. It’s been a day of unexpected emotional confessions,” she chuckled. “I…” she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I’m really scared. Scared of being hurt, scared of falling even more in love with you a-and another good thing being taken from me. B-But I want this for real with you too. I don’t wanna keep pretending what we have isn’t real when we know it is. If you’re ready to jump, so am I. And we can just be scaredy cats while we fall together?”

He pulled her into his lap and pressed his lips to hers softly. “Not a fan of you callin’ me a scaredy cat,” he teased. “But yea. I meant it when I told you, you’re safe with me. All of you. And I’ll do whatever I gotta do to make sure you believe that shit.”

Her heart fluttered a bit. She knew he meant his words. If there was one thing she had always been with Michael, it was safe. And she adored that about him.

“I love you,” she whispered.

“I love the way that shit sounds. Say it again.” .

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” her lips tugged upward into a grin as he started peppering her face with kisses and having her repeat the phrase over and over again. He picked them both off the ground and continued kissing her and causing her to giggle as he placed her back in bed.

He settled her under the covers and pulled her tightly into his arms. Their legs were quickly tangled in each other’s as she laid her head on his chest. They laid there in silence for a while before Raven sat up. As much as she enjoyed cuddling in his arms, Raven wanted more. Emboldened by their confessions of love, she pushed herself to her knees and straddled his hips.

“You used your safe word. We ain’t gotta…” she pressed a finger to his lips stopping him.

“I know what I want and need, Bakari,” she whispered, using his nickname, which was only reserved for family and close friends for the first time. Michael was not much of a crier but hearing his nickname on her lips made his heart skip one or two beats, made tears sting the back of his eyes. “And I want you. You showed me how much you loved me… now let me show you.” She gave him a sly smirk before shifting between his legs to taste him.

The pair lost track of how many times they moaned or screamed those three magic words to each other. But by the time they were finished, their bodies a tangled mess of limbs and bodily fluid, Raven knew, in her heart, that his words were true. And so she fell asleep nestled in his warm embrace, feeling true happiness with anther person for the first time in her life.

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A/N: The babes finally confessed their love for each other!!! Woohoo! How do you think our two lovebirds make the jump from fake romance to a real relationship? Thank you for reading! Drop a comment and let me know what you thought :)

#black writers #michael b jordan #michael b jordan x oc #michael b jordan x reader #mbjordanedit #black panther #michael b jordan fanfic #creed 3 #adonis creed #creed iii

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