I see so many well intentioned women talking about how modesty is important when it comes to men's objectification of them. Like, they will condemn men's lust, but say, "but we have to do our part too." I just need you guys to understand that there is literally no amount of clothing you can wear to keep men from sexualizing you. It sucks, but it's true.

I dress very modestly by the typical conservative Christian standard... Loose clothing, long dresses/skirts, nothing low cut, etc. Usually the only skin I expose is my forearms, neck, and face... But I am not exempt from being sexualized. I can't tell you how many times I've heard stuff like, "it's so hot when women leave things up to the imagination" and "I love your librarian/teacher vibe, it's so sexy." Men sexualize nuns and muslim women, who are completely covered. No woman is exempt from this.

Why is this important? So you can stop blaming yourself for men treating you like sexual potential instead of a person and hold men accountable for their own willful inability to control themselves.

To the Christian women, you are not responsible for men choosing to lust after you. Lust is a choice. I am same-sex attracted, and when I find myself attracted to a woman, I simply choose not to fantasize and lust after her. Men are capable of the same, they just like to shift blame.

As a Christian, I dress modestly as an act of humility more than anything else, but I know there is nothing I can do to control the sinful actions of men. Please stop blaming yourselves.

It annoys me that when you say that a girl getting pregnant might be foul play other women are really quick to defend men. A student I used to teach is pregnant and my friend was talking about how she doesn't understand why the girl didn't use protection. The pill was the example used. I then mentioned that it could have been that the guy poked holes in the condom or removed it without asking. My friend immediately jumped to the men's defense "you can't put it all on the men". As if she wasn't putting it all on the girl and her mum 5 minutes ago. Men need to be held accountable and challenged. This stuff happens far more often than it should and it needs to be discussed wihtout people being like "woe is men".

PEOPLE LOVE TO BLAME WOMEN FOR MEN'S ACTIONS.

People find out Will Smith slapped a man in front of the whole world and Jada gets hate for it.

People find out Doja Cat's ex boyfriend was racist and Doja gets hate for it.

Then it was Nicki Minaj, now Taylor Swift. Hold the men accountable for their own actions, not the women who dated them!

The following was written by Deborah Gray (2022)

"THE TRIUMPHANT RETURN OF THE ALPHA MALE

Media and fashion moguls insist that the only power right now is a straight man in a dress.

There they are on covers of Vogue and stomping through model catwalks and the entire media can’t get enough. It’s as if it has never happened before, for any other reason but trans solidarity.

But Harry Styles in a ball gown circa 2022 will never touch the collective female soul as did David Bowie or Mick Jagger in lipstick and black eyeliner circa 1970’s.

But why is that?

Speaking from experience, the rock boys in the biggest breakthrough era of music, fashion and lifestyle, unwittingly tapped into and relieved the young females’ gut instincts from our collective fear of all the larger scarier, macho/masculine males who loomed up on us like the school headmaster, our often aggressive fathers, your boss, most adult males in general, who scowled at women and girls and ordered us around at school and home and work and everywhere we went, with total impunity and the privilege of laws to help them do it.

The ‘sexual revolution” which was meant to bring equal freedom to women, we discovered was total crap. Women were going to have to fight for it even harder.

Freedom? Girls discovered quickly that free love and rights flowed one way only and it was still all according to and at, the male pleasure.

Any female who dared to express their own sexuality openly and test the supposed “free love” themselves were faced with the same jealous and scowling boyfriends, many violent who left single mothers in droves.

While the “boys sewed their wild oats” and were hot studs and lover boys, the females who thought they too “made love not war” were actually still being called out as just sluts and molls. Nothing changed in reality.

The testosterone filled drive to screw anything and anyone over in power struggles, aggressive controlling behaviour is obviously so entrenched into and forced onto male culture, no matter how many times the blokes wore flowers in their hair.

The alpha male is king and must be admired by all whereas strong alpha females are to be attacked in packs and destroyed before they get too far up the ladder.

Alpha male pack instincts are focused only on their own freedom, their dream of the world that everyone must get in line with them or be thrown out of the social pack or job or opportunities.

The alpha male’s aggressive behaviour towards females always has been and will always be their addictive obsession to control the female sexuality and any self expression of it.

And the rise of AGP power and SELF ID laws are the endgame of where it’s led us.

Many of us have been trying to figure out what drives gender ideology and what is driving the sudden rise and “popularity”. It’s so obvious to me now with the success of self ID activists . It’s all about having complete sexual control over women, personally and in all areas of society.

We’ve had a period where women did succeed on getting together gaining equal or close to it power in society, with serious political clout. But the men who were young and free on those times never really forgave women for that.

Male culture has only gotten worse today with free porno websites and children accessing it and learning the fake news that girls are up for anything including violence and being degraded.

No wonder gender ideology has spread and is lauded by so many straight clueless to empathy, alpha (and wannabe alpha) males, they can again be led by their overblown libidos and egos with nothing in the way and go back to the good old days where males ruled in awards, creativity, science and certainly sexually. Women who say no to male sexual control now are terfs and bigots.

Men of all persuasions (and the females follow their agenda because of a supposed “tolerance and kindness” ) are able again to create a culture of fear and oppression for girls and women globally with impunity and without checks and “female only” laws to stop them - now under the pastel distorted rainbow."

Deborah Gray (c) 2022

the thought of having a dom giving me tasks to complete throughout the day. just receiving a text where they list things that i need to complete. not even sexual, like get certain chores done, work on specific assignments, and stuff like that. i just think about it and i melt.

men and minors dni

I’ve noticed a lot of (non-radical) feminists are open to the idea of criticising bimbo feminist trends such as ‘I’m just a girl’, ‘girl dinner’, ‘girl math’ etc. for their obvious misogynistic and stereotypical nature.

But when Dylan Mulvaney releases a song titled ‘days of girlhood’ which is just a list of stereotypes including shopping, crying, laziness etc. the conversation is suddenly ‘That’s just her experience with girlhood! Girls are allowed to be hyperfeminine!’

Hating your oppressors isn‘t actual hate, it‘s a reaction to ensure self-protection. And it‘s justified.

Women who "hate men" don‘t think of single individuals. We refer to the male sex class which holds supreme and systemic power against us.

Take it up with the bad apples in your circles at all costs and then speak to us again.

it's been pointed out on here before that a lot of terf arguments are actually rooted in sexist idealology that feminists fought and died to unnormalise decades ago and that's its own kettle of fish but one thing i also find very frustrating about this so called 'radical' feminism is that it's so... defeatist? like the moment you categorically label an entire section of society as Bad and Inherently Evil then there's also the implication that nothing can be done about it, and it completely takes all accountability away. saying all men are evil is just another way of saying boys will be boys. he raped her because he's a man. he hit her because he's a man. he didn't listen because he's a man - it's almost offensively oversimplified. there's no point trying to fix this issue in society because men are just Like That, okay! so now what? it's not like they're going anywhere, so you just accept that 50% of the population are evil and will forever treat you terribly and there's nothing to be done about it bc they're biologically predisposed to it? like is that fr the argument here? you're soooo radical for that

Do you know "Eggnoid"? It's a rather old webtoon about a girl being put into circumstances on taking care of a robot guy who hatched from an egg (hence the title) the robot guy appears to be a grown man, but he has mental capabilities of a toddler and even acts like one. So, it's like those types of "born sexy yesterday" tropes but the gender reversed. The girl also repeatedly shown crushing over the robot guy and at some point, she called him her boyfriend despite she's supposed to be his caretaker.

I haven't read it, but I can definitely attest that there's a double standard when it comes to gender roles and age gaps / situations of grooming / etc. in literature but especially in webtoons. And by that I mean I've legit seen people hold comics like Lore Olympus accountable for their gross dynamics between a young teenage girl and the much older and richer love interest, but then turn around and say it's "couple goals" for a teenage boy to hook up with a much older woman. At the end of the day there's still a power imbalance due to the age gap and the massive differences in life experiences between the two, gender doesn't really change that.

Big ole' sip of hot tea as a take, but speaking as an AFAB, a lot of women are just as capable of grooming and taking advantage of younger men in the same way as men towards young women, it's just that on the surface people tend to get skittish about addressing that because they don't want to sound like they're going "yeah well actually women though-" and dismissing the notion of toxic masculinity. Which yes, that's a fair thing to worry about, some people do use that as a way to dismiss the arguments made regarding patterns of grooming behavior in men towards young girls (among many other problems in which men and toxic masculinity are held accountable), but like any topic of this nature, it's not always a cut and dry black and white thing. Toxic masculinity and the grooming of teenage girls by adult men is a very real problem! But just like how we can understand the nuance that being a man by default doesn't immediately make you a predator, we should be able to understand the nuance that being a woman doesn't give you a free pass to do the same things we call out men for doing without consequences. It's like the double standard in LO that it's okay for Persephone to do the same things - if not worse - than what Leuce and Minthe and Thetis do, because she's the main character and she's not some scummy "mud-sucking" lower class person, she's rich and a Queen and she's wearing a giant hat so it makes it okay /s

Unfortunately the saying of "I support women's rights and women's wrongs" is being used in a completely tone deaf "literally excusing the main character of her crimes and wrongdoings against others because she happens to be a woman" kind of way, while missing the real point of the saying - supporting women's wrongs doesn't mean you celebrate their abuse towards others, it just means women shouldn't automatically be viewed as irredeemable "crazy bitches" for making mistakes like any other human does, and like any other human, they should be given the opportunity to grow and heal and learn from their wrongs.

When it comes to Persephone specifically, it can't even be chalked up to a "one time mistake" anymore, she's literally been showing patterns of abusive behavior for years now and refusing to take accountability, and now even Rachel is meme'ing on it knowing fully well it's what people are calling Persephone out for in the critical spaces. That's not "supporting women's wrongs", that's enabling the wrongs of a person because they happen to be a woman, and that's not okay. Persephone isn't a "girl boss", she's a bully.

I think the double standard in these age gap romances also speaks to the idolization and fixation on women as being nothing more than conquests for men as well. People who romanticize age gaps between a young woman and an older man think, "Wow, that woman is so mature for her age, enough that an older richer man would choose HER to be his wife! So romantic!" when in reality those who know those dynamics are unhealthy and toxic recognize it as an older man taking advantage of a young woman who's being love-bombed into believing she's "mature for her age" so that she'll sleep with him. Meanwhile, on the other side of it, those who romanticize young men getting with older women tend to come at it from the angle of "well she's so old and washed up, no man could ever love her, her chance for love and a happily ever after is gone now! it's so wonderful of that young man to give that sad and lonely old woman love and attention!" and yet fail to see it from the same perspective of an older person manipulating a young person with zero life experience, because there's still this deeply-rooted ideology that women are "used up" by age 30 and any man who gives her attention beyond that age range is a hero. Completely neglecting the fact that relationships aren't off the table at all for older single people and they don't need to involve robbing the cradle.

I blame the lack of older couple representation in media tbh, so many mainstream romance stories are basically just this:

To pull it out of the perspective of LO and webtoons for a second (sorry, I'm going on a hell of a tangent here), remember how gross it was when it was revealed in Fifty Shades Darker that Christian had been introduced to the concept of BDSM at age 15 through one of his mom's friends (i.e. an older woman!) who Anastasia calls "Mrs. Robinson"? And they had that relationship until he was 21? And they never really did anything about that, it was pretty much just there to explain why Christian was fucked up but he still got married to Anastasia, an innocent woman who he was repeating the cycle of abuse with, and lived happily ever after anyways?

Yeah. That was pretty fucked up.

men blame women/feminists for their problems meanwhile they haze each other to death so often some us states had to made laws against it

nothing women can and do inflict on men comes close to the suffering, humiliation and pain they inflict on each other

i’ve seen some shit online and please tell me none of you actually believe that the drivers would’ve lost their seats if they had spoken out when asked about the current situation. please tell me none of you believe that. let’s not find excuses for men and their misogynistic behavior. this is the sport that let Nikita Mazepin race when there was video proof of him sexually assaulting a woman. this is the sport that found nothing wrong with Max Verstappen calling fellow drivers ableist and other offensive slurs. nothing, i repeat, nothing would’ve happened to any of them if they would’ve given an answer, like Lewis did for example. stop enabling this kind of behavior and protecting them, they’re all grown ass man and their current behavior is repulsive and shameful. hold them accountable.

why is most of the ire about a man sexually assaulting someone about two women

”he shouldn’t have had to apologise” he was fucking misogynistically blaming a woman for shit her grown ass son did and expecting HER someone COMPLETELY UNRELATED to the situation to do something bc she was a woman and woman have to take responsibility for what men related to them do actually. he should apologise bc messaging sarah at all is misogynistic as shit. like imagine if people sent dream's mums dms if he did shit they didn’t like that’d be obviously horrible and invasive and misogynistic as shit bc why you blaming a random woman for shit men did. he should be on his fucking knees begging bc he did like misogyny 101 blaming women for shit men did.

I'm starting to see the realization hit people again that Daemon and Nettles more than likely had a consensual sexual relationship. I know many people can't help but prioritize Rhaenyra in all of this, but I don't like to see the hate being taken out on Nettles.

People suddenly don't think it's wrong to sentence her to death and use racially coded language to discredit her dragon bond because 'Nettles slept with Daemon. She isn't innocent or a victim. "

Daemon had an obligation to his marriage not to step out of it, to be there for his wife and be monogamous.

Nettles didn't.

The idea kinda plays out with the in world justification as well. People act like Nettles is some enchantress who used spells to get Daemon to forsake his wife and sleep with her. See how insane that is?

Daemon is almost 50 years old, touching on Nettles.

He's the issue. Take out the rightful anger on him. He earned it.

But also, this is a man who slept with Rhaenyra at his wife's funeral. The wife who thought she was the second choice, while ignoring their kids at the time of their grief.

This is the woman who slept with a man at his wife's funeral, then days after married him in front of their now grieving kids. I'm not going to push for a girl code rule here.

I'm not saying that Nettles is some morally superior being (she literally is) who doesn't deserve a side eye for doing it (we aren't worthy of her. The burned men had the right idea).

What I am saying is certainly that she doesn't deserve more than Daemon and definitely not more than Rhaenyra. So if it does go down like that in the show, leave my girl alone because we now have a pot/kettle relationship.

one day we’ll talk about how this fandom continues to hype aaron ehasz, the writer with several allegations of horrible treatment from women he’s worked with over the years, to put down bryke

i just love how y’all are suddenly not feminists when it comes to the writer with a misogynistic track record. and we all know why.