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#harry deserves a place to call home
ala-baguette · 1 year
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Returning Home
Summary: One year has passed since the War ended, and Harry returns to Godric's Hollow. Relationships: Harry Potter/ Ginny Weasley Rating: G 1400 words  |  Read it here or on AO3
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Harry stepped out the front door of the cottage and paused in the sunlight on the garden path. The breeze rustled through the new spring growth of the trees lining the lane at the village edge. He heard the faint tinkle of a windchime outside one of the houses a few doors down. It was so quiet here. He pushed his fists deeper into his pockets.
In the entry behind him, Hermione was still grilling the estate agent on minutiae that he didn’t care about but probably should. Appliances and piping and cesspits and roofing and insulation and flood maps. Harry tuned it out. Instead, he merely stood and breathed the crisp clean air and listened to the wind. He could smell lavender from somewhere. He wondered where it grew.
An arm snaked its way around his own, and he blinked away the reverie about nothing and everything to look down. Ginny looked up at him and smiled. There was a subtle question there, but it was not insistent. So Harry merely extracted his hand from his pocket and wrapped it instead around her. Ginny seemed content with this. She rested her head against his shoulder and the pair of them merely stood there quietly. Listening to the wind.
“It’s a wonderful community here. Both Magical and Muggle alike,” the estate agent was saying to Ron and Hermione behind them. She’d clearly given up on trying to talk to Harry directly. “You should take a bit of time to explore, if you have it. See the village centre. Maybe have a bite in the Lion and Flame.”
“Where is that?” Ron asked.
“Wizarding pub. In the main square. The entrance is in the alleyway just to the right of the Muggle pub entrance. You’ll see a brick wall with a lion and phoenix. Just tap your wand and you’ll be able to step through.”
Harry did at least manage to muster himself to offer a smile, a thank you, and a handshake as the estate agent bid them farewell. What had been her name? He probably should have been paying better attention. No matter. Hermione would know.
The four of them walked along the village streets. Ron and Hermione were talking about asking price and cost of living and more things Harry didn’t care about. He remained quiet. They passed a small community play yard and Harry smiled a little, imaging bringing Teddy here when he came to visit. But he didn’t raise his head to look down the street where he knew the ruins of a long-destroyed house still stood. And he kept his eyes on his feet as they passed the war memorial, even when he caught the transformation out of his peripheral vision. When they passed the church, his eyes did dart a glance to the graveyard behind. But he didn’t slow. Not today. He would be back. He felt Ginny give his hand a small squeeze.
The pub was just where what’s-her-name had said it would be. They melted through the door one at a time and let themselves down the torch-lined steps. At the bottom of the stairs, Harry paused to look around. He took in the old-fashioned wood bar with its many beer taps and liquor bottles. The dim but warm lighting. The dark wood ceiling beams and panelling. The mismatched tables and chairs scattered across the well-worn red carpet. Harry loved it immediately.
“Alroigh’ me’ansum?” the barkeeper called to them, glancing up from where he was filling a round of pints; it seemed an automatic greeting he offered to any who entered. But then he did a doubletake and stared at Harry for a moment, his face inscrutable. The gaggle of middle-aged men who were leaning against the bar and chatting merrily, followed his gaze and stilled as well. Then the old witches in the corner who were gossiping over their sherry and knitting. Then the pair of boys who Harry vaguely recognised as Hufflepuffs who’d been a few years ahead of them at Hogwarts. Harry flattened his fringe. Ron and Hermione exchanged a smirk, and Harry reminded himself of the futility of this habit.
Harry braced himself for the onslaught, but the barkeeper merely went back to filling his pints. His patrons, albeit reluctantly, seemed to take their cues from him. They turned back to their conversations, though eyes continued to dart in Harry’s direction periodically.
After a moment’s hesitation, Harry sidled up to the bar, his friends falling into step beside him. “Hello,” he greeted as the barkeeper filled the last of the middle-aged men’s pints and passed them across the bar. The barkeeper jerked his chin up. Harry couldn’t say if it was an acknowledgement of his greeting or a request for his order or both. “Four butterbeers, please?”
The barkeeper merely nodded, unsmiling, and ducked under the counter. He reappeared a second later with four bottles. He tapped his wand to pop the lids and slid them across the counter as one. Harry reached into his pocket for his gold, but the barkeeper said, “On the ‘ouse.”
Harry shook his head. “Thanks. But I insist.” He slid a handful of coins across the counter.
The barkeeper shrugged. “Sui’ yourself.” He counted out the appropriate coins, and slid the remainder back to Harry. “Welcome ‘ome, Mister Po’er,” he said, still without a smile.
And there were murmurs around the pub as others intoned the same.
“Welcome home, Harry.”
“Glad to have yeh back.”
“Your ‘ealth, Mr. Po’er.”
Harry nodded at them awkwardly in thanks and picked up the butterbeers, passing one each to Ron, Hermione, and Ginny, all of whom were quietly watching him. They seemed to be waiting for him to pick the table. His eyes roved the pub.
“Tha’ table in the corner.”
Harry blinked and turned back to the barkeeper. “Sorry?”
The barkeeper nodded toward the far corner of the pub. “Tha’s the one your dad and his mates used to si’ in. Every Friday noigh’. Least ’til your mum and dad wen’ into hidin’.” Harry followed his gaze to a round table with four empty chairs. Harry merely stared at it for a moment, before he remembered himself.
Blinking, he looked back to the barkeeper. “Thank you,” he said earnestly. The old man just nodded again, then turned his attention to wiping down the bar.
Ron, Hermione, and Ginny followed him to the table. They seemed to sense that he was not in much of a mood for conversation and were content to let him sit quietly as they chatted. He sat in the chair in the corner and stared around the pub as babble continued around him. Harry watched as two older wizards debated politics; he watched as the Hufflepuff boys moseyed over to the dartboard on one wall; as one of the witches worried over a dropped stitch in her knitting and fretfully counted along her needles.
“—What do you reckon, Harry?”
“Huh?” Harry blinked and looked around to find his friends all staring at him expectantly.
“The house,” Hermione clarified patiently. “We were discussing the house. Just wondering how you liked it.”
“Oh. Right.” Harry’s eyes took another promenade around the room before they landed on Ginny. She was merely looking at him, patiently awaiting his answer. Harry swallowed, suddenly strangely nervous. How could he put into words that her opinion on this mattered more than anyone’s? Perhaps more than his own. He looked down at the butterbeer he held in both hands atop the table. “I thought… maybe it seemed like it could be home.”
He chanced a glance back up to Ginny. But she was beaming at him. He smiled back.
“Well, cheers to that, then,” said Ron, holding out his butterbeer.
“To home,” Hermione agreed.
“To home,” said Ginny softly, her eyes not leaving Harry’s.
His heart felt light as they clinked their bottles. He looked around the room again as he sipped his butterbeer, feeling affection for this room full of people he’d never met. His eyes fell on the barkeeper who was making his way toward their table with what appeared to be a large bowl of chips and a dipping sauce Harry couldn’t recall ordering. He suddenly realised he was famished.
For more about the Lion and Flame Inn, see the Remus Lupin installment of my Left Behind Series, 'Empty Chairs at Empty Tables'.
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starberry-cupcake · 1 year
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gotta give it to them, it took 6 seasons but a place to call home is the one period drama that made the gay rare pair canon and gave them the most peaceful outcome of the entire cast
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gurugirl · 5 months
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2. The Unicorn | nanny!yn
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Unicorn: An individual who is willing to join an existing romantic relationship. Usually a bisexual female.
Summary: The night has arrived and things are going really well for all three of you until suddenly they're not.
A/N: This will be 3 parts. Based on this and this.
Word Count: 10k+
Warning: 18+ only, smut, jealousy, angst, hurt feelings, daddy kink
The Unicorn Masterlist
When you left, Harry walked back inside his house feeling like a new man. He felt real. He felt strong and virile. He didn’t know what had come over him being so direct with you. So rapacious. But it felt natural. It was like something about you brought it out of him.
It wasn’t until he was sitting at the table with the boys eating dinner that any little inkling of guilt started to wash over him. It was then he realized he hadn’t even thought about Kit since he started making dinner. He was conjuring up images in his mind of what you would look like on Saturday in various positions. Imagined the way your eyes would widen and then squeeze close when you orgasmed. Wondered how many he could coax out of you. He’d completely blocked out that his wife would be participating.
He would need to tame himself. See how Kit responded to seeing you and him together. If she enjoyed it he could loosen up a little but he was concerned about the way you two clicked. Your dynamic was very good, Harry thought, that he would have a hard time sharing you. Plus, he wasn’t sure whether or not Kit would like to hear you calling him Daddy. And Harry really wanted to hear you call him Daddy again.
When his wife got home the twins were already in bed and Harry was in the master bedroom reading, “So how did it go?” She asked him as she plucked her heels off, placing her palm on their dresser to balance herself.
“It was good. Why don’t you get ready for bed and then we can talk about everything that happened?”
Harry had decided he’d play down what had happened between you two. He’d be honest but he wouldn’t divulge some of his innermost thoughts. The parts where he forgot all about his wife and how your soft and docile demeanor was refreshing and made him feel masculine and wide awake all of a sudden. No. He wouldn’t share that much with her.
Kit turned off the ceiling light and turned on her lamp before climbing into bed with Harry, “So, tell me how it went.”
“Yeah. It was good. She was very open. She said she wanted to join us on Saturday for sure.”
Kit nodded, “And? Did you two kiss or anything?”
Harry’s heart began to lob in his chest at the idea that he was going to tell his wife what he’d done with another woman. Kit seemed fine. She insisted she was but Harry still felt unease about how to handle this situation gracefully. Without anyone getting hurt.
“Yeah, we did. Brought her into the bedroom, here so the kids didn’t see. Kissed her and then got her clothes off, fingered her,” he inhaled softly and felt his cheeks glow and his chest burn. “That was it.”
Kit grinned and slid in close to Harry, smoothing her palm under his shirt, “Yeah? I wish I could have seen it. Did she come?”
Harry puffed out a laugh of disbelief. Maybe he was fretting for nothing. Perhaps his guilt had been needless. Maybe Kit was right. Maybe this would be really good for them.
“Yes.” He looked down at where his wife’s hand was traveling.
“And did you come?”
“No. I kept all my clothes on when I was with her and then when she left I had to get dinner for the boys and I was with them until I finally got into bed a bit ago.”
Kit palmed over his crotch, “You poor man. You did so good for me today, baby.” She kissed his lips, “You deserve a treat.”
Harry sighed as his wife put her hand into his night pants and began to pump his cock slowly. Closing his eyes with a smile he realized he probably had nothing to worry about.
.           .           .
You were a mess. You couldn’t sleep in the way that was necessary to function properly the next day. You kept going from squealing into your pillow like a 16-year-old after your crush admitted to liking you too, to feeling overwhelming anxiety about what was to come. Kit was an unknown in the equation. For many reasons.
The first was that you’d never been intimate with a woman even though you crushed on women for longer than you had men. The second was that you were worried that now that you’d called Harry Daddy and knew how much he liked it, even if Kit didn’t like that it would be hard for you to turn that off. The third thing was that you weren’t sure you’d want to see Harry kissing anyone else or watch him preferring his wife over you, because he would. Because Kit was so much prettier than you and she was his wife, the mother of his children. You were certain that you’d wind up kind of being the third wheel.
But maybe you had it all wrong. Maybe you’d love being with Kit and things would just be fun. But your rabbit hole Google search wound up landing you on a subreddit all about this kind of thing and did not leave you with confidence about what was to come. So many horror stories about “unicorn hunters” finding their “unicorn” and the ways threesomes can end a marriage.
But you said yes. And you intended to follow through. They both really seemed to want it. And you trusted them. Perhaps your experience would be among the rare ones that worked out for the better.
The rest of the week felt like you were slowly entering into a new realm of existence. Dramatic way to put it but that’s just how it felt. Things would change for you. Not only would you be having your first sexual encounter with a woman, but you’d also be having a threesome. You’d be in the middle of a married couple and that was not a situation you thought you’d ever get into.
But also, you were very aware that Harry was planning on fucking you. In front of his wife. And you couldn’t imagine that going well. Of course, you forced your fantasy to make it positive but there was something that was telling you that it wouldn’t be. You hoped you were just nervous for nothing.
On Friday before you left Mr. and Mrs. Styles’ home, William and Warren were told to get their suitcases ready for grandma and grandpa to pick them up the following morning.
Kit helped you put your bag on your shoulder, as she spoke, “We’re really excited about tomorrow. I hope you are too, Y/n.”
You smiled as you turned to look at her, “I am. A little nervous, I’ll admit.”
You were more than a little nervous.
“That’s okay. We are too. We’ll talk about everything tomorrow and go from there.”
Harry walked into the living room with you and Kit and there was just something different about him following that night he had you in his bed. It made you squirmy and intimidated. His eyes had always been intense but now they felt more severe. Daunting.
“So, tomorrow at 3 then?” He asked you as he raised his brows.
You nodded, “Yeah. I’ll be here.”
And from the moment you drove away from the Styles’ house until you knocked on their front door the following afternoon, you couldn’t get yourself to calm down or think about anything else.
You paced and talked out loud to yourself. You set up scenarios in your head and acted them all out, some of them turning you on quite a lot, you couldn’t lie. You practiced how you’d respond in certain situations. You took a long bath with salts and essential oils and got rid of as much hair as possible from your body so you’d be extra smooth.
You played your music loudly. You masturbated thinking about the way Harry fingered you. You picked the perfect outfit and panties. And you tried to sleep. But that was nearly impossible.
When you did finally wake up it was already noon. You’d slept in. Which shouldn’t have surprised you because you couldn’t get to sleep the night before. You jolted up from your bed and panicked as you ran into the bathroom to get the shower going. You couldn’t believe it was happening. You wondered what Harry and Kit were doing to prepare. Were they freaking out like you were? They both said they’d never done anything like this so they had to be at least a little nervous about everything.
Your soft pink lace bra and panties were your favorites. You didn’t wear them all the time but it felt like the appropriate affair to break them out.
At about 2 pm you received a text from Kit.
If you’d like, you can stay the night. We would be happy to have you all night.
That, you hadn’t expected. You had envisioned it being along the lines of you and the Styles getting finished up and then using their bathroom before an awkward goodbye and See you Monday (you really had thought of every scenario already).
But to stay the night? Would you sleep in their bed with them? Or would they offer you their guest room? Or the couch? You couldn’t imagine sleeping next to them all night. Of course, maybe that would be nice? You really didn’t know. It was hard to think with a clear brain when Harry was involved. The whole situation was wacky but the opportunity to be allowed to sleep with Harry and his pretty wife and have everything be just fine after (hypothetically) was simply not something you’d want to say no to.
.           .           .
Harry was nervous. He was trying to reign in his thoughts and his doubts. He didn’t want Kit to know how deep his worries ran. Because she seemed excited. She seemed far calmer than he felt.
He forced himself to eat breakfast and a light lunch so she didn’t question it. He didn’t know how things would play out once you arrived. And he tried not to imagine all the salacious things he’d been thinking about you in his private time.
When you’d finally arrived with your bag in hand and knots in your tummy Harry took deep breaths as Kit answered the door and hugged you in greeting.
“I hope you’re hungry! I’m making salmon and parmesan risotto.It’s my specialty and I think you’ll like it.” Kit led you to the kitchen where her husband stood and the moment he laid his eyes on you the smallest something ignited in him. It was only a spec of something but it was as if a layer of worry was wiped away instantly. Just seeing your pretty smile with your bag in hand had his mind swirling with thoughts of what might come. He realized part of him didn’t think you’d actually show up. But you did.
He tried leaning on Kit’s poise and mimicking her excited demeanor. On the way she seemed so calm but confident. That’s how it should have been for him. But the bigger parts of worry in him stemmed from the fact that his more dominant natural inclination was starting to peek through the cracks slowly. He’d even initiated something with Kit the night before, which she quickly shot down. He knew his wife was not one for being submissive. Or at least letting him take the reigns fully. But he knew Y/n would want it.
And worse yet, he hadn’t asked Kit if she’d mind if you called him Daddy. That was weighing heavy on him. He knew he should have talked to her about it days prior but there was part of him that worried she wouldn’t like that. He wasn’t sure how it would be brought up at that point but it would come out sooner or later he was positive. Especially with the way you seemed to love saying it.
“This looks so good, thank you, Mrs. Styles,” you smiled softly and looked from Harry to Kit and then back to the steaming pot ofrisotto. You weren’t sure you’d be able to eat much but you’d force something down. Your mind was jumbled and you felt tense.
But of course, this was something new for all of you. You’d all be going through this together and so you probably didn’t have much to worry about.
Harry took your little bag from your hand and his bright green eyes on you felt hot, “I’ll take this upstairs unless you need anything from it right now?”
You shook your head, “I don’t need it. Thank you, Mr. Styles.”
You had wanted to ask Harry what his wife thought about the whole Daddy thing but you hadn’t had the chance the rest of the week and even if you had you wouldn’t have been able to get the nerve up to ask.
“So, what are you thinking? What things are you into?” Kit asked as she handed you a glass of wine.
You leaned your hip into the counter and shrugged, “I don’t know. I think I like it when other people take the lead. I’m sort of, maybe a little submissive,” you laughed softly as you brought your glass up to your lips and looked at Kit. It was the first time you’d really taken her in since you’d arrived. She was wearing a pretty black lacey dress that fit her gorgeous body like it was made for her. Black heels, a smoothed back, high ponytail. Bright red lips, perfectly done eyeliner. Her cheekbones made you envious. You’d always noticed her cheekbones in the past. As well as Harry’s. Imagined they were made for one another. Two exquisitely stunning people.
Kit leaned against the counter next to you, her body turned toward yours, “That’s perfect for Harry and me. We’re both a bit dominant,” she sipped her glass and you watched her eyes trail down over your neck. You’d put on a pretty choker. Light pink small pearls to go with your sexy (you hoped) pink lacey underwear. Over it, you wore a lightweight cream sweater that was almost sheer with a short white skirt with a print of pink and yellow butterflies all over it. You felt underdressed compared to Kit. She looked like an adult and you looked like a child.
When Harry returned to the kitchen he poured himself a glass and looked at you and then to his wife, “What’d I miss?”
“Just asked Y/n what she likes. She’s going to let us take the lead. And look at his, H,” she gently put a slender finger under your pearl choker, “she’s perfect. I told you.”
Harry’s gaze felt so heavy on you. It felt like he was dissecting you with his eyes, “I think we’ll have a lot of fun together.”
A safe choice of words.
Dinner was quite delicious. Though you weren’t really that hungry, the wine you drank helped you feel a bit more comfortable, and sitting and chatting about normal things with Kit and Harry felt really good.
You helped clean up. Harry had put on some music and you were feeling loose from the wine so you were swaying the tiniest bit with the beat. When you felt hands at your hips you turned and it was Kit, swaying with you. She leaned her chin over your shoulder and spoke into your ear, “Leave the dishes. Those can wait. I think it’s time to get comfortable and talk. Come,” she pulled at you and you suddenly weren’t feeling as loose at the notion of talking.
Ground rules. Expectations. It was all necessary stuff.
You followed her into the living room where Harry was already sitting on the couch at one side. He gestured for you to sit next to him and Kit sat down on the opposite side, putting you in the middle.
The music was still playing as Kit turned toward you and put her arm up on the back of the couch, “Tell us your concerns. What things you absolutely do not like.”
You looked down at the coffee table where all three glasses of wine were sat and took a deep breath, “My concerns… I’m worried someone won’t like this after we start. Like,” you looked at Kit, “maybe you realize you don’t want anyone touching Harry. Or even if Harry doesn’t like to see you with anyone else? I just don’t want anyone to feel upset.”
Kit nodded, “A good point. I feel the same. I think we all do. We won’t know until we get into it but I think if there is anything anyone doesn’t like we need to be able to speak up about it. Agreed?”
You nodded, unsure if they wanted you to continue. That was the biggest concern of yours, sort of. You were worried about calling Harry Daddy when things got going. You were worried you would feel left out, which wasn’t fair of you to feel that way. Kit and Harry were married, after all. They’d certainly be paying the most attention to each other.
“Anything else? What things do you not like at all? What is a hard no for you?”
Harry had been quite silent since you all had sat down. But you were feeling heat pouring off of him. And you could tell he had his eyes on you.
“I mean… maybe if I think of some I’ll tell you? I haven’t done much, to be honest. Nothing stands out in my mind.”
“Do you like to be spanked? Or maybe restrained?” Kit raised her brows at you.
You shrugged, “I haven’t really been spanked before. Definitely not restrained.”
“You haven’t really been spanked?” Harry finally spoke up.
You turned to look at him but found you needed to look away quickly. He was too attractive.
“Well, once a guy sort of smacked at my bottom during… Like I was on top and…” you swallowed trying to calm yourself as you saw his hand move from his lap to the space between your thigh and his on the couch, “Like it was just really quick. Just once. So I wouldn’t say spanked but… yeah.”
“And did you like it?” He asked.
You looked at him and couldn’t help but feel yourself singe with warmth, “I didn’t mind it.”
“We’ll learn as we go,” Kit added.
Harry pulled his gaze away from you to his wife when she spoke and it was the first time you noticed it. His unease. It almost seemed like he’d forced himself to look away from you. Like the way you felt when you looked at him.
Kit reiterated that she agreed with you. That there would need to be open communication. She said that she liked to be dominant or at least to have most of the control.
“And I also like to be in control. To be dominant.” Harry said as he looked at Kit and then to you, “I also wanted to see if it was comfortable for you, Kit, if Y/n calls me Daddy.”
Kit looked to the coffee table quietly in thought and then looked at you, “Do you like that? To call your sexual partner Daddy?”
Your eyes widened at the question. You hadn’t expected that you’d answer this question. But you also assumed Harry had already spoken to Kit about it.
“Uh, well. Yeah, I think so.”
“Have you ever called anyone Daddy during a sexual encounter before? Are you comfortable with that?” Kit pressed.
You shot your sight to Harry and then back to Kit. How did you answer this? He obviously hadn’t told his wife that you were calling him Daddy that night and now you didn’t know if you should reveal that you already had. And Harry had been the only one you’d ever given that moniker to.
“I mean I’d like her to, but if she’s not comfortable with it we don’t have to do it, Y/n.” Harry quickly interrupted. You knew he was doing a bit of damage control. Perhaps that little thing would just be a secret between you and Harry. You were okay with that, you figured. You didn’t want him getting into trouble with Kit.
“Yeah. That’s fine. I don’t mind. It doesn’t make me uncomfortable at all.”
“Okay. Good. I’m okay with it, I think. We’ll feel it out and see if we like it,” Kit said, seemingly unbothered.
With the music playing you felt Harry’s pinky graze your bare thigh and Kit leaned forward to grab your glass of wine and hers, handing you yours.
“You smell so good, Y/n,” she said to you with a dreamy look on her face. “Doesn’t she, Harry?”
Sipping your wine you heard his deep voice from your right as he spoke, “She smells delicious.”
The change of the song and Harry’s pinky ghosting at your thigh and Kit’s closeness with her eyes on you had you feeling excited. Your heart began to lob in your chest, faster and faster.
Kit ran her finger up your neck, “You’re so shy. I really love it. Y/n, we’re going to make sure you have fun tonight.”
She got onto her knees and reached across you to pull at Harry’s hand and drew him in for a kiss. You watched them as they wound their mouths together right in front of you. You were smushed back into the couch with your eyes on their lips and watched their tongues meld and lick and heard Kit moaning.
When they parted Harry grabbed your empty glass of wine and placed it on the coffee table before he cradled the back of your neck to pull you in for a kiss. He wanted to feel your silky lips on his and he wanted to make sure you were included in the fun too. He would see to it you weren’t left out.
Kit watched her husband kissing you, their nanny with amazement. It was the first time she’d ever gotten to enjoy this sort of thing and she already loved it.
You felt Harry’s warm and wet mouth pull away from yours as Kit took over and pressed her lips to yours. The way it felt to have her mouth on yours versus Harry’s was night and day. Kit was soft and unmistakably feminine and you moaned as you reached up to pull your arms over her shoulders. With your body turned toward Kit you felt Harry’s big palm slide up your thigh and lift your skirt just a little before his chest was pressed into your back and his lips were on your neck.
“Can I mark your neck, sweet girl,” Harry groaned into your sensitive skin as Kit’s mouth moved with yours flawlessly.
“Yes, Daddy…” you breathed out the words and hadn’t even realized you said Daddy until the name hung in the air immediately after you’d said it. But no one seemed bothered. Kit only became more fervent and you felt her hand slip under your soft sweater.
“Can I touch you? Will you give us permission to touch your body and play with you now?” Kit panted her words before dotting kisses on your cheeks.
“Oh god. Yes, you can. Anything you want.” You meant it. If they wanted to touch your naked body or see it or tear your clothes off you were already so far gone you just wanted to please them. Everything was green for you so far.
You hissed softly and felt the pinch and sting of Harry’s lips at your neck as he marked you like he wanted.
Kit’s hand slid up your tummy to your pretty bra and she squeezed your plushy tit under her palm, “Just say if you don’t want something. Fuck you have such nice breasts, Y/n…” she leaned back and lifted your sweater before dipping down to kiss over the sheer lacy fabric over your nipples and you gasped.
Harry put his hand on your neck and turned your face toward him roughly, smearing his mouth against yours with a deep moan. You opened your mouth to let his tongue inside and you felt a drizzle of arousal pool into your panties. You loved the way it felt to have his big palm on your neck and his mouth ravaging yours while Kit’s lips and tongue worked over the flimsy fabric of your bra, wetting it and making your nipples hard underneath.
He could feel your delicate pearls under his palm as he used his thumb to squeeze you gently. But when he heard your tiny whimper his cock throbbed in his pants and he pulled at you, “We need to get her upstairs in bed.”
Kit grinned and the three of you awkwardly made your way upstairs. The moment you were in their bedroom Kit had her hands at your skirt, pulling at it, “Want this off of you. Okay? He’s had the chance to see your body but I haven’t yet. I’m dying to see you.”
Harry unbuttoned his shirt as he watched his wife remove your skirt and then peel off your little sweater. He walked up behind Kit and pulled at the bottom hem of her dress to pull it off, “Need you out of this too, Kitty.”
You’d never heard him call his wife Kitty before but it made sense now that you’d heard it.
The moment you saw Kit in her tiny black thong and her amazing tits out (she was sans bra) you dropped your mouth open. Her body was insane. She had a tattoo of a flowering tree on her ribcage and another at her hip with shooting stars. It fit her perfectly.
Harry put his hands on her shoulder as he stood behind her and kissed her neck, his eyes on yours.
“My tits need some love, Y/n. Come here,” she reached for you and it was easy to enjoy the way it felt to have a soft breast in your mouth. You sucked at her nipples and lapped your tongue over her skin with your hands cupping both sides, smushing your fingers in to really feel how soft and lovely it was. You couldn’t believe you’d never done anything with a girl before. You were certainly glad Harry and Kit were so forward.
Harry moved his position from behind his wife to behind you. You hadn’t expected to feel his hands at your bum, squeezing and pulling at your cheeks before giving you a soft smack.
You jolted slightly and looked up at Kit with a laugh.
Harry pressed his hips into your bottom against your pink lacy panties and groaned, “Beautiful ass.”
Kit grasped your jaw and pulled you in for another kiss. Soft and tranquil, wet and warm. There was an easy difference in the way a woman kissed than a man and you adored it.
You felt Harry’s hand at your bottom, pulling at your panties to slide into your crack to give him access to your full bottom. The sudden warmth and wetness against your bum cheek might have startled you more if he hadn’t given you a swat just moments prior. His mouth and tongue moved over your flesh slowly until he pasted a wet kiss right over where your panties were stuffed into your bottom.
He gripped your hips and pushed his face in further, soft lips kissing along where your panties were, “Gotta get these off, okay, Y/n? As pretty as they are,” he put his fingers into the band of your lacy panties and pulled them down your ass and legs and you continued kissing Kit with a wet, desperate tongue.
But you gasped and your eyes bounced open when Harry's mouth found your pussy from behind. He pulled your cheeks and put his mouth between them, licking over your labia. You couldn’t help but to turn to look behind you as best you could to watch his dark curls from behind you.
Kit’s hands slid to the back of your bra and unhooked your clasp to get you out of your bra, “Oh shit.” She took you in and delicately moved her hands over your tits, “Gorgeous.”
Harry stood up and pulled his shirt off his shoulders and then began to take his pants down and underwear. He was too hard in his pants to keep them on. He watched as Kit pulled you to the bed. Now that you were completely naked Kit wanted to see you spread out.
You were pushed to your back and she climbed between your legs, “Can I eat you out a little, Y/n? Missed eating pussy.”
You nodded quickly as Kit smirked at you and gave you one more soft kiss to your lips.
You saw Harry come up behind her and look down at you as his wife bent over to press her lips to your cunt. He looked from Kit’s ass to your face and pulled at her g-string to move it to the side as he pressed his fingers into Kit’s entrance, “So wet already, Kitty. You don’t get wet f’me like this.”
Harry’s strong and broad shoulders, the view of his dark tattoos scattered on his chest and arms made you wish Kit wasn’t in your way so you could see him unobstructed.
Kit moaned and lapped at your clit as she looked up at you, “I just love how she feels, H. I’m so horny looking at her body.”
Harry could agree with that assessment. He was already throbbing and he hadn’t even had his cock touched yet. Not that his wife couldn’t get him worked up but having you in the mix was exciting. New.
He fucked into his wife with his thick fingers from behind her slowly and loved the way you sounded when you moaned. He reached down to grip his cock and stroke himself as he looked at your pretty face. Moving his fingers from Kit’s pussy he slid his tip up and down her crease and she lifted and looked back at him, “Yes, H… fill me with that big dick.”
“Yeah? Want this big cock, baby?” He looked at you as he asked.
You moaned when Kit wrapped her lips around your clit again and you felt her fingers thrust into your soft, wet hole.   
Harry felt good plunging into Kit as always. She was familiar and welcoming. He knew exactly what to expect and exactly what she needed to get off. But this time, as familiar as Kit felt, it was so different as he thrust in and pulled back to his tip with his eyes on yours.
He began to rock into his wife and each thud into her pushed Kit into your pussy harder. Kit was bent down with her mouth on your cunt, her ass in the air at the edge of the bed while Harry stood, feet on the floor, and fucked his wife from behind. But he had a great view of your face and your tits. It almost felt like he was already fucking you with the way your eyes were locked on his.
The delicious surge of Kit’s fingers digging into your pussy and her tongue on your bud had you spinning. But it was Harry’s eyes on yours as he grunted with each roll of his hips that had you nearly at your end already.
Kit lifted and looked at you. When you felt her lips move away you quickly shot your gaze back to hers. She continued fingering you, “You gonna come for me, Y/n? Fuck!” She closed her eyes for a moment and pushed herself back onto Harry as she used her free hand to rub her clit, “God, right there, H.”
When Harry began to go in sharper, Kit placed her mouth back on your pussy and moaned at the way her husband was pounding into her. His deep thrusts were making her press into you.
He grasped Kit’s hips harshly and moaned at the view of his cock stretching his wife out and then looked back at you with your lips parted and your hands squeezing your tits together. Your neck elongated.
The sharp spike of stimulation made you cry out and you couldn’t stop the spiral in your tummy from tensing and twisting as you came. Soft wet lips on your clit and slender fingers pumping through your walls felt amazing. But when you heard Harry groan loudly as he began to come inside of Kit you opened your eyes to find his fixed on yours, mouth dropped open with deep breaths heaving from his picturesque chest.
You felt the final deep thrust as the last of his come drained from his cock into his wife as her mouth smashed into you.
You were both breathless as you came down from your orgasms. The eye contact felt intimate. You loved the way it made you feel connected to Harry and to his wife.
Harry grinned and watched as he slowly slid his cock out of Kit, pinching his fingers into her hips, “Y/n, would you like to eat my come from my wife’s pussy? How does that sound to you, sweet girl?”
You nodded and Kit lifted her face from your pussy slowly. Her own chest was heaving as she was so close to her orgasm, “I love that idea. Want to taste Harry dripping out of me, Y/n?”
You pushed yourself up by your elbows, “Yeah, how should I…?”
Kit crawled over you and pushed you down. She brought her cunt to right over your face and let a bit of Harry’s come trickle out onto your chin and your lips, “We’ll do it like this. Now eat.”
With that, she settled her pussy down onto your mouth and you closed your eyes as you sucked and tried to use your tongue the best you could. You tasted the saltiness of his come and the sharpness of Kit’s arousal mixed as you swallowed and pulled at her folds with your lips. The idea that you were getting to drink Harry’s come made you shiver in delight. You never imagined that you’d be swallowing his come down your throat.
When you felt a big, hot mouth dot kisses along the inside of your thigh and felt the grip of a big hand lifting your leg you were spurred on to lick and suck at Kit harder. You were reminded that there were three people in the room.
You felt Harry’s shoulders push against the back of your thighs and felt a deep vibration of something he mumbled against your pussy before his wide flat tongue licked upward before gently rolling your clit in his mouth, his slick muscle pressing and swirling over it.
The sensation of Harry eating you out in comparison to how Kit did it was night and day. Kit was warm and soft, precise. Harry was like a caveman starved, masculine, and messy. You could already feel the way he was smearing your arousal all around your pussylips and the crease of your thigh.
Kit began to rub at her clit as she brushed her pussy over your lips. Her essence was getting all over your face and you really kind of liked the taste. It wasn’t that different from yours, the smell and taste of it.
“Oh my god, baby, those lips,” she moaned and pinched at her nipples as she began to come.
You could feel her shaking and the way her pussy hole fluttered over your mouth, her hips jerking as she rode into your lips and bumped into your nose.
Meanwhile, Harry was moaning into your pussy and lapping at you like ice cream melting. When you felt the addition of his fingers gently poking past your slippery muscle you let out a muffled groan into Kit’s pussy.
Harry lifted your hips up further and dug in deeper. With the new angle, it felt different and you were unable to gain any leverage with your legs at all. You were totally at his mercy with any movement below the waist.
Kit lifted off and sighed, “Such a good girl, Y/n. How was that?”
You gasped and tried your best to respond while your pussy was getting wrecked with Harry’s mouth and fingers, “I like… really liked it!”
Kit softly ran a finger up your neck and to your cheekbone, “Yeah? For a first time that was good. I think we’ll need more practice but that can be arranged. Can’t it, H?”
Harry grunted and smeared his mouth against your clit. You couldn’t hear it if he responded or not but then when Kit moved away you watched as she grasped Harry’s hair and pulled him off your pussy, “Right, Harry?”
He looked dazed as he darted his eyes from his wife to you, “What?”
“Is her pussy that good that you couldn’t hear me?” Kit laughed.
You saw Harry gulp as he stood up and it was the first time you noticed the big tiger tattoo on his left thigh and the laurels on his hips. He was a piece of art, “Sorry, what did you say?”
“I said we could arrange to do this again,” Kit sat back onto her haunches as she looked at her husband.
“Yeah. If Y/n wants.”
Kit looked at you and back to Harry, “So what do we think? Need a break? Are we ready to relax? We’ve all had our orgasms.”
Inwardly you pouted and wanted to throw a fit. You had come but you really really wanted to suck Harry off and have him fuck you. You wouldn’t mind eating Kit out again, but you felt you weren’t done with Harry. Needed a little more.
Harry laughed, “Ready to relax? Kitty, I’m just getting started. I kind of hoped I’d be able to have you choking on my cock or something,” his cocky grin beamed at his wife.
“Choke on your cock? Maybe I’ll let you choke on my dildo. You know I don’t do that. If Y/n wants to she’s welcome to it.”
You sat up and looked from Harry to his wife as they discussed what would come next. Harry looked you up and down like you were going to be an indulgent meal, “Want my dick in your mouth, sweet girl?” Harry gripped his shaft and slowly slid his hand up and down. He was only half-hard. He needed a minute to get back to full mast after his orgasm.
“Yes. I would really like that, Harry.” You looked from Harry to Kit to make sure everyone was on board.
“I think you mean Daddy. Right?” Harry’s stern voice had you sitting up straight.
“Yes, Daddy. I want it.”
Kit softly moaned, “She’s such a sweet girl, Harry. Enjoy your blowie. Mind if I get some water? I’ll be back in a couple of minutes.”
Harry kept his eyes on you, “Go on. We’ll be fine. Right, Y/n?”
You nodded, “Yes, Daddy.”
Kit paused and looked from you to her husband but then shook off the tiny alarm going off in her head before leaving you two alone.
“Get down here. On your knees. I’ll take it easy on you.”
You climbed off the bed and got to your knees. Harry pumped his dick right over your face and reached down with his free hand to grasp your neck to pull at you, making you sit up further, “Your pearls are so sweet. Did you dress up just for, Daddy?”
“I did. Wanted to be cute for you.” You smiled at him with wide eyes.
“Cutest thing I’ve ever seen, Y/n. Now, get it all wet. Lick all around. I want to get nice and hard for your throat. And maybe if Kitty doesn’t mind, she’ll let me fuck you. Would you like that?”
Your heart pounded as you looked up at Harry and nodded, “Yes, Daddy. Really want to feel you.”
You began to tongue along Harry's long shaft. From the base where he had trimmed dark hair to his tip. You plopped your lips around his crown and gently sucked, making him hiss before you dragged your tongue down to his base and back up again to wet every inch of his girth. You were amazed at the sounds coming from him. Soft and whimpery. You lowered your mouth to his sack and smoothed your tongue and lips along the skin before opening wide and pulling half into your mouth.
“Fucking angel. Shit, I love that.”
You noted his reaction to your mouth on his balls. To save for another day.
When you drew your tongue upward again, along his length you felt him plump. His cock grew harder and harder until he was rigid and completely ready for fucking again.
“Now suck on it,” he pressed the back of your head to urge you down over him.
You wrapped your lips around his head, saliva pooling at your tongue and dripping down his cock as you slowly began to take him in your mouth. Deeper and deeper. He was thick, though and you were concerned your mouth wasn’t big enough or that your teeth would graze his skin. But you pressed on, doing your very best.
He kept his hand at the back of your head and helped gently guide you down, “Come on. You can get a little more in there, baby. Fucking so good with that mouth.”
You felt his tip nudging at the roof of your mouth and slip in close to your tonsils and you gurgled, swallowing around his tip and making him choke out a loud moan.
You did it again, loving the way he responded and you felt him slip in deeper, yet you still hadn’t gotten him all in. He was likely a bit too long for you to take him all. You’d need practice.
The sound of you gagging wetly and Harry groaning filled the room as your eyes watered.
“Jesus Christ, Y/n!” Harry watched your lips as they parted around his cock, drooling down your chin.
You could hear Kit when she came back. She’d said something but you were so fixated on Harry’s cock and making him feel good that your brain was fuzzy and out of focus. The only thing that mattered was making Harry feel good and you couldn’t care about anything else.
The grip he had on the back of your head and the way his hips were moving felt like he was enjoying you as you wetly spluttered on his cock as it grazed the back of your throat.
When Harry pulled you off you sat back and looked up at him expectantly. Harry kept his eyes on you. He looked like he was proud of you as he spoke, “Kitty? Can I fuck this sweet thing? Want to feel to her around my cock.”
You watched Harry as Kit answered, “Okay. I think that sounds hot. Just use a condom, though. Is that okay with you, Y/n?”
You nodded, still focused on Harry, “Yes.”
Kit led you to the bed to lie on your back and kissed you softly, “I’ll play with you a little and probably kiss Harry too while he’s fucking you. Is that okay?”
You finally looked at Kit, breaking the spell you were under with Harry, “That’s fine. Yeah.” You nodded.
“And if we do this again maybe I can wear a strap-on and fuck you too.” Kit raised her brows.
You nodded and smiled. Harry was busy putting a condom on as he listened to his wife talking to you. He hated to admit it to himself, but he loved it when Kit stepped out of the room for a bit. He felt freer to express himself with her gone. Was less worried about sounding like he was preferring Y/n to her.
But he wondered if once he got his cock inside of you how he’d feel. Would he be able to overcome the way he wanted to just dominate you and claim you for himself? It was a slippery slope what was happening but he was freefalling into his dominant persona with you and it felt odd having his wife watch it all. He hoped he didn’t get too into it and lose track of what was really happening.
Harry crawled onto the bed between your legs and thumbed at your clit as he watched Kit kiss you. He wanted to kiss you. Wanted to start off nicely with a warm kiss and push into you that way. So he waited while his wife groped your tits and licked into your mouth.
You reached down to Harry’s hand, where his thumb was at your bud and you bucked your hips upward. He had the most gorgeous view of your wet pussy, just waiting and ready to stretch open for his cock.
When Kit finally pulled her mouth away Harry leaned over you, “I’m gonna kiss her for a bit, Kit. If you don’t mind,” and then he pasted his mouth against yours and lined his cock up with your entrance.
When you felt him push past your tight muscle you could have cried. He was wide and long and you were so wet and he began to thrust in and slowly, his mouth devouring yours. He went in with long strokes, sinking in until he couldn’t push in any further. His muscles working into you, thighs and bottom and back flexing and indulging.
Harry lifted his face from yours to look down at you, cupping your jaw, “You doing okay?”
Your mouth was wide open as you nodded, “So good, Daddy.”
Harry cooed at you as he began to fuck into you harder, making your tits wobble with the force.
Kit leaned over you and began to kiss you again but you could hardly kiss back with the way your pussy was being pounded into and the sound of Harry’s groans were all you could focus on. He liked your pussy, you could tell. And that had your heart singing and your body buzzing.
He loved how your pussy looked wrapped around his cock, tight and juicy as he pushed in and brought himself back to the tip before ramming into you again. He wanted Kit out of the way so he could see your face but he knew he couldn’t ask her to move. She was going to be part of this.
But when he dipped in especially deep, the puffy head of his cock nudging into your cervix and hitting your g-spot with each stroke you gasped and moaned loudly, making Kit move back.
“Daddy!” You howled as Harry panted and repeated what he’d just done. You squealed and threw your head back. It felt so good. He was pushing into your guts and breathing heavily over you.
Harry was glad he’d already come so he could last a bit longer with you. He wanted to drag it out. Really get to fuck you properly and feel you. It was lush being inside of you and hearing your pretty voice respond to him.
“Like Daddy’s cock, baby?” He spoke between gritted teeth as he pushed your thighs into your chest and leaned over you, nearly folding you in half so Kit couldn’t interrupt again. He was getting hot and dizzy for you. Wanted you all to himself.
“It’s the best! Oh fuck!! I love it. I want it… oooh! Need you so bad, Daddy!” You weren’t really sure what words came from your mouth as he pushed into you at the new angle, but all you knew was that your entire world was Harry. Harry… Harry… Harry… He was on you and in and he liked it. You were making him feel good.
“Need me, baby? Need this cock inside your little pussy?”
Harry’s balls were aching as he nudged into you, his sac pressed into your bum each time he bottomed out.
“Yes…” your voice was shaky and breathy as he railed you into the mattress.
Harry let go of your legs to lean over you and press his mouth against yours once again. Wet and hard, teeth scraping and moans of debauchery.
“Need you too, baby. Needed this fucking pussy. You gonna let Daddy own this pussy, baby?”
“Oh god, yes Daddy! This pussy is yours!” You whined.
Kit was at the edge of the bed watching the spectacle and she was quite turned on by the scene. She gently rubbed her pussy as she watched her husband railing you but the words spoken between you and Harry had her feeling a bit weird. She knew she should call a time out but she wasn’t sure if that was a good idea. You were in throws of passion, she tried to reason.
“Holy shit, Y/n!” Harry moaned as he felt you begin to squeeze around him. His pelvis rubbed into your clit and the little sparkles of your orgasm started to grow and grow with each yummy thrust into your clenching walls. His cock spread you wide and his pelvis smeared into your bud as if his body was made for you. The angle was exquisite. Harry thought so too.
“Coming on Daddy’s cock, Y/n? Fucking creaming all over me baby.” He let his strokes go long and deep and languid as he hovered over you, his arms and back flexing as he rolled into you.
You were stunned and unable to speak for moments on end. Your vision went blank and your ears fuzzed out with a ringing white noise that blocked all sound.
Harry moaned a laugh at how hard you were coming, “Feels good doesn’t it baby? Cock is made for you…” his deep thick voice gave away that he was about to come. Kit recognized it.
“Don’t come inside of her. Even with a condom,” Kit sat up and watched closely as you finally gasped and cried out. For some reason the idea of her husband coming, even if inside a condom, while balls deep in another woman didn’t feel right.
Harry groaned and closed his eyes. He wished he would have known before but of course, Kit hadn’t even been sure that was something she didn’t want.
He kept working into you, letting you ride out your orgasm as you moaned and babbled Daddy, yes Daddy over and over again.
When your eyes finally peeled open Harry had slowed his thrusts and he dipped down to kiss you. It was messy and wet. He was on edge, his orgasm so close his balls were vibrating.
He looked down at you and thumbed over your cheek, “Flip over for Daddy. Gonna fuck you from behind and come on your back okay?”
You moaned and nodded as Harry pulled out and watched you lay on your tummy, ass nudged up.
Harry looked at Kit, “Not gonna come inside her. Don’t worry.”
He smoothed his hands over your ass and squeezed, parting your cheeks as he lifted your hips slightly to angle you up for his cock.
Harry pressed back into you, both of you sighing in relief, “Thank you, Daddy…” you mumbled into the comforter.
“Rub your pussy for, Daddy. Want you to feel good, baby.”
You did as he said, reaching your hand down between your body and the mattress as you fingered over your clit and Harry’s loud grunts were timed with each of his strokes into you.
His hips were slapping into your bottom and the tightness of your cunt around him and the view of your pretty anus was like fine art. It was slushy and wet.
You pushed back against him and felt saliva stream out of your mouth onto the bed below.
“Want your come, Daddy,” you quickly slicked your fingers back and forth along your clit as Harry’s masculine moans grew deeper and louder as he neared his end. “Please, Daddy!”
Harry watched his cock disappear into you over and over again, “Want my come, baby? Deep inside your cunt? Want to be stuffed with it?”
You nodded into the mattress, “Yes…” you whined.
“Sounds so fucking good,” Harry cooed as he began to tremble. His arms grew wobbly as his balls tightened. His cock twitched and pulsed and he quickly pulled out, ripping his condom off before spurts of his come started to pump from his dick. He wrapped his fist around himself and milked his shaft, pouring all over your back as he used his free hand to keep your cheeks spread apart. In a daring move, he released the last bit of himself over your ass and pussy as he loudly choked out a moan.
With his chest heaving and your ass swaying back toward him in hopes of him pushing his come inside of you the voice of Kit pulled you from your dreamy haze.
“Get up.” She did not sound as happy as she had been not long before.
Harry removed himself from your body and you pushed yourself up and turned to look at them.
“That’s not what I meant when I said don’t come in her. Coming on her back was okay but then on her pussy like that? You should have asked me first.”
Harry looked at you with his come all over you and back to his wife, “Sorry, Kit. It was all just in the moment. I shouldn’t have come on her like that.”
“I just… I don’t know. We need to talk about this more I think. But not with her here.” She gestured to you.
You were sort of stuck with your ass in the air, unable to move much because of Harry’s come on your back.
“Okay. That’s fine. We’ll talk. Let me clean her up,” Harry pointed at you.
“She can clean herself up. We don’t need to baby her, Harry.”
“Come on, Kit. She deserves to be treated nicely. And it’s on her back. She needs help.”
Kit suddenly walked away and Harry leaned onto the bed to look at you, “Are you okay?” He put his hand on the back of your thigh.
“Yeah. I’m okay. I didn’t mean to make her mad.”
Harry looked over his shoulder and back at you, “She’s not mad, sweetheart. This is all new for us so she just needs a minute. I’ll be right back with a towel okay?”
You felt a burning embarrassment slither down your spine at the idea that Kit didn’t like something you’d done. It was exactly that thing you had wanted to avoid. You loved being with Harry and Kit but you knew you let yourself get lost with Harry and you went too far. You’d fucked everything up and now you were surely going to lose your job and Kit would hate you forever.
Harry got back onto the bed with you and gently wiped at your back, “Don’t worry about anything. You did nothing wrong, Y/n. Okay?”
You nodded and kept your eyes cast down over the comforter in shame. Nothing felt good anymore. You were humiliated. And even though Harry said you’d done nothing wrong it didn’t feel that way.
You put your clothes on silently as Harry slid on his pants and Kit returned, “I want her to go home.”
Harry stood quietly as he looked at Kit in her robe. You let your sight flit between Harry and his wife and noticed the way Harry looked like he was fuming. Pissed.
“Absolutely not. We invited her to stay. She didn’t do anything wrong, Kit. What is wrong with you?”
“I want to talk and I don’t think I can do it with her anywhere near me.”
“Why are you talking about her like she’s not standing right here?” He gestured at you.
Kit sighed and looked down, “I don’t feel comfortable, Harry.”
A scoff fell from his lips, “Well geez. Just imagine how she feels.”
Kit looked at Harry with a scrunched brow, “Are her feelings somehow more important than your own wife’s right now?”
Harry shook his head and ran his hands over his face, “I’m not saying that. I’m saying hers are just as important as yours. She’s a human, Kit. Fuck.”
Kit left the room again, stomping as she walked into the hallway.
Harry turned and stepped in front of you, taking your hands in his, “I’m sorry about this. I didn’t know she would act this way. I’ll get the guest room set for you but you can’t drive after all that wine we drank and I’m not letting you take an Uber home alone at this hour.”
“It’s okay. I don’t mind. I’ve never had any bad experiences with Uber drivers-“
“No fucking way I’m allowing it. You’re staying here and that’s final.”
Harry walked out of the bedroom and you plucked up your bra and panties that were lying on the floor and followed him to the guest room.
But you stopped before you went inside when you heard him and Kit arguing quietly.
“That was too intimate, Harry. Her asking for your come and you saying how good that sounded. Saying your cock is made for her? Fuck.”
“Kit, we were having sex. I can hardly remember what things were said to be honest. I was caught up in the moment.”
“I shouldn’t have let you fuck her.”
“Maybe not, but it’s done. Too late to take it back now. Jesus.”
“I don’t want her here. Now all I can think about is the way you two were just ignoring me and enjoying each other. I was completely left out there at the end.”
“I didn’t mean to do that. I’m sorry.”
Kit sighed, “Me too. I feel disgusted. You should sleep on the couch tonight.”
“Come on, Kit. Don’t be like this. You know we were all just having fun.”
Kit walked out of the bedroom and stopped when she saw you. The look she gave you told you to keep your mouth closed and move out of her way. It felt like a threat. A warning.
You stood silently in the hallway as Harry made up your bed and you felt tears stream down your face. Kit suddenly walked up to you and handed you your bag roughly before walking back to her bedroom and closing the door behind her.
Harry peeked out of the room and saw you standing with your bag in your arms and tears in your eyes.
His heart dropped as he pulled you into the bedroom and wrapped his arms around you, one hand cradling the back of your head as he shushed you, “Don’t let her get to you, baby. Please don’t cry. You haven’t done anything wrong.”
You gulped and the softness of Harry with his arms around you made you cry harder. You tried to stop your tears but everything had really just made you so overly emotional. You’d gone from ecstasy straight to shame and humiliation.
He rocked you gently back and forth and kissed the top of your head, “I didn’t even get to love on you after. I’m so sorry. I wanted to make it so special for you and it was ruined. Please don’t be upset. I’ll make sure Kit’s okay by the morning, okay sweetheart?” Harry held you out in. his arms and looked at you. He thumbed at the tears under your eye and you blinked up at him.
“Fuck,” he whispered as he leaned in and kissed your forehead.
Leading you to the bed he pulled the blankets down and patted at the mattress, “I’d help you change into your night clothes but I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to do that right now. Are you gonna be okay in here? The bathroom is right there,” he pointed at the ensuite guest bathroom. “Towels are in the closet. I’m gonna go and talk to Kit and see if I can calm her down. Text me if you need anything. Okay?”
You nodded with a pout. You were doing your best to hold your stupid tears in as Harry hugged you again and then stopped at the doorway and turned to smile at you sheepishly before closing the door and leaving you cold and alone and shattered.
Part 3
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alisonfelixwrites · 1 month
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the deal - part 1/3 (*) [harry styles au]
//
part two, part three.
summary: in which harry & claire are both single parents and their kids are best friends in school. atlas & finn are six years old and want to hang out all the time even if their parents don't get along .... at first.
word count: 23,973
content warning: smut!! (not too much for my standards lol). mentions of drug use, single parenthood with neglect from the other parent, mentions of physical/emotional abuse
this one is also already on my wp (to be found under 'muse')!! but she deserved her own moment on tumblr because this is one of my faves ❤️
//
“Oh my god.” The voice of a distressed woman behind the wheel sounded through the car.
Claire pressed her hand down on the honk once more, “Fucking move!” She roared before swerving to the side, “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” The many curse words easily tumbled from her dry lips as she made her way through a part of town she hadn’t often driven through.
Her old Toyota stood out like a sore thumb between all the fancy cars of the fancy people who resided here in these fancy homes. She was sure that if they took one look at her, her Burger King outfit would stand out too against the bright blue of her old car.
“Why the fuck do you drive a Tesla when you don’t even know how to use it!” Claire continued shouting, making hand gestures to the other drivers. An elderly woman driving a BMW gave her a disgusted look and Claire simply rolled her eyes, speeding off now that the intersection had finally cleared a bit.
Her heart was hammering in her throat and her hands were tightly clamped around the wheel. With her cap still on her head, Claire hadn’t had the time to get changed once she noticed the many missed calls on her phone. She simply jumped into her car after her shift and drove like a maniac to try and keep the damage to a minimum.
Waze finally showed the place she had to be at, and she came to a screeching halt before clumsily driving up a massive driveway which held a Land Rover and an old Volkswagen Beetle. Claire jumped out of the car and rushed up to the front door, completely out of breath.
Jamming her finger on the doorbell over and over again, she noticed a set of lights being turned on in the hallway before the door was yanked open.
“I’m so sorry!” She immediately blurted out, being met with a man who shot her an angry and very judging glare. Claire couldn’t blame him. She had fucked up.
He towered over her, blocking the doorway to his house as Claire shifted on her feet. He took a quick glance at her outfit, “I take it you’re Claire Carter?”
“Yes.” She breathed, “Shit, I-I’m so sorry I’m so late.” She palmed her forehead, fatigue taking over. Her entire body ached after standing on her feet for so many hours, faking polite smiles at the customers who did nothing but treat her like shit. She reeked of fries and couldn’t wait to take a shower.
The man in front of her wore joggers and a casual, white shirt. He had a clip holding his brown hair away and some scruff on his jaw. The judging look he sent her made Claire wish the ground could swallow her whole. He eventually exhaled, “You’re the one who forgot her child at school?” The snide tone of his voice made Claire press her lips together.
She lowered her eyes and swallowed, “Look, I’m just here to pick up Atlas.” Her voice was softer now, “Where is he?”
“Inside.” The man nudged his head inside his house, “Playing with my boy.”
Claire nodded, “Right. You’re Finn’s dad, aren’t you? Atlas talks about him a lot."
“Yeah.”
Silence took over and Claire glanced into the hallway behind him, “So… Can you tell him I’m here? Or can I come in?” A hint of impatience laced her voice. It was already late and Claire knew the never ending amount of chores that were waiting for her at home. Not to mention she had to get Atlas to bed on time to not disrupt their entire weekend schedule.
“He’s a good kid, you know?” The man spoke, snapping Claire out of her thoughts. She flicked her eyes up at him before frowning softly, “I’m aware. I’m raising him.”
“No, like… He’s a good kid. Teacher was raving about him. I went in to pick up Finn and they were the only two left. The teacher was about ready to leave and she couldn’t reach you. She was about to call the police.”
Claire’s cheeks turned an embarrassed shade of pink as she swallowed. She was being lectured by this man, who clearly judged her for not being a decent parent and forgetting to pick up her child after school. Claire’s stomach turned, knowing full well she already wasn’t making a good impression with the people of Atlas’ new school. She was hardly ever there to drop him off or pick him up and had a sitter do those things. She had never even met most of the teachers or the other parents, which was very frowned upon at that school.
“I’d like to take him home now.” Claire repeated, her voice a little hoarse, “It’s late.”
“Wonder why.” He scoffed before sighing and turning around, “Finn!” He yelled into the house. Claire felt her bottom lip wobbling, attempting to recompose herself before the sheer look of disgust of this man brought her to tears.
She soon heard little footsteps running over the wooden floors of the house, which honestly was more of a mansion. Even when Claire felt like shit, the sight of her little boy with his shaggy blonde hair, cheered her up immediately. With a wide grin on her face, she crouched down, opening up her arms for him to jump into her.
“Hi, baby!” Claire squeaked, spinning him around as Atlas clung to her. He had some sort of stain on his shirt but Claire didn’t mind, holding his body close to hers. “Hi, mummy! I missed you today.” Atlas bubbled in response. Claire hummed before putting him down, already feeling the massive ache in her back, “I know, I missed you too.”
Her eyes then flicked to the boy standing in the doorway too, his dad having a protective hand on the top of his back. “Hi.” Claire smiled, holding out her hand, “You must be Finn.”
“Yes.” He timidly spoke, offering her a small smile. He shook her hand with little enthusiasm, “Are you Atlas’ mum?”
“Yeah, ‘m Claire.” She smiled back before straightening up, “Well, thank you again. We should get going.”
“That your car?” Finn’s father nudged his head towards the blue Toyota and Claire exhaled, “Yes.”
“Hm.”
She refrained from rolling her eyes, “Have a good night.” She mumbled, not even waiting for his response. Atlas shouted a goodbye to Finn, waving excitedly before climbing into the passenger seat of the car. Claire checked her mirrors, avoiding the shocked eyes at all costs that her kid was getting in the front seat of the car.
Claire being the responsible parent she was couldn’t afford to fix the broken safety belts of the backseat, so Atlas drove up front with her. Backing out of the long driveway, she watched Finn and his father disappear back inside of the huge house.
“’M sorry, baby. Mum had to work late.” Claire yawned softly as they hit traffic again to drive home, “Did you have fun with your friend?”
“Yes, Finn’s really nice. A little quiet.” Atlas spoke. Claire hummed, “Are you hungry?”
“No! Harry made us dinner.”
“Harry.” Claire nodded, “That Finn’s dad?”
“Yes. He’s nice.”
Claire huffed and took a left, “Debatable.” She mumbled under her breath, not for Atlas to hear. The rest of the car ride was filled with Atlas’ babbles that Claire honestly loved. He spoke about nothing important most of the time but she loved hearing his voice and the way he saw the world, what observations he made. In her mind, she was already thinking about tomorrow though.
She had the Saturday-shift to cover too, so Atlas was spending the day with his father. The thought alone made Claire’s stomach clench but she tried to push it away. He deserved a shot at two parents and perhaps Evan really did deserve another chance to prove himself as a father.
The heavy door to the appartement hardly budged as Claire put her entire weight against it to open it up. The entire building shook as she did so, and she could tell the neighbours were listening to the news through the thin walls of this crappy building.
No one ever said it was this hard to be an uneducated, unsupported single mum.
With a heavy sigh, Claire ran her fingers through Atlas’ blonde whisps as he excitedly walked into their home. As always, both kicked off their shoes by the door and headed through the narrow hallway – passing both their bedrooms – towards the living area. Pizza boxes were on the counter from last night and Claire was glad Atlas had already eaten at his friend’s house because in all her haste, she even forgot to pick up groceries.
Ignoring the rumbling of her own stomach, she decided on a quick shower to feel fresh and clean again before snuggling up on the couch with Atlas to watch some of his favourite shows. Claire fought to keep her eyes open, refusing to go to sleep before her six year-old did.
Life was pathetic enough as it was.
She couldn’t shake the look of absolute judgement and despise she had received from Harry. Yes, she had forgotten to pick up her child after school. Yes, she had driven like a maniac and showed up at his door dressed in her Burger King outfit, hours late. Yes, they had been close on calling the cops on her.
But that didn’t make her a bad mother.
Claire sighed, gently stroking her fingers over Atlas’ forehead as he sucked on his thumb. It was a habit she tried to get him to shake, but simply didn’t have the energy to constantly point it out to him. He was too old to still be doing that, but part of Claire knew that even Atlas was traumatized from the shit he had witnessed as a baby and an infant.
It had taken Claire two years to get away from Evan and the past four years had been hell. And bliss at the same time.
She didn’t think she’d be a single mum at twenty-eight, making ends meet and having no savings to start something up. But Atlas was kind, fun and energetic. Now that he was a bit older, it was like having a mini-me. She could always talk to him and he was intelligent for his age, following along easily in the topics Claire spoke to him about. He was respectful albeit a little wild at certain times.
In his previous school they had called him a ‘wild child’ who ‘acted out because of the way his mother raised him’. Simply because he had learned the word ‘fuck’ from Claire and had yelled it out in class.
Once.
Claire thought she’d be done with the judgement, but after only a few weeks in his new school she could already sense it again. If not from the teachers, then definitely from the other parents. She was happy Atlas made friends so easily and that he was such an open, approachable kid, but she could really do without the critiques of the others.
It was on Monday that she saw Harry again.
After much whining from Atlas, Claire decided to drop him off at school herself for the first time. Along with all the other parents in line, she was crouched down in front of him to make sure everything was in his backpack for the day. She was parked with one wheel on the curb in front of a garage, so she really didn’t have much time.
Glancing around to check for police in the street, Claire hurried up and stuffed everything in his backpack, “There, you’ve got everything.”
“Thank you, mummy.” Atlas grinned. A dimple popped in his cheek, one of the things he inherited from Evan. Claire’s stomach turned at the memory. Another memory was the ache in her arm from the bruise she had there. A much more recent memory, from picking up Atlas on Saturday.
She wasn’t sure who had reacted worse to her being late for pick-up. Harry, who had stared her down and made her feel insignificant, or Evan, who had grabbed her and shoved her against the wall while yelling in her face.
“Good boy.” Claire proudly smiled, cupping his cheeks and pressing a kiss to his forehead, “You be good today, hm? Belle will be here to pick you up after school.”
Atlas’ face dropped, “Belle?” He pushed his bottom lip out into a pout, “Why not you?”
“I have to work, honey.” Claire sighed, “But I’ll be home for dinner.”
“But I don’t like Belle.” Atlas whined, “She stinks.”
Claire could feel a few pairs of eyes on her and rolled her lips inside of her mouth, “Well, that’s because she smokes so much. But I have to work, I’ve explained this to you.” Claire kept her voice down but Atlas whined louder, jutting out his lip, “But mummy!”
“Atlas.” Claire sternly whispered, shaking her head to him, “I’ll see you for dinner, end of discussion.”
He stared at the ground with a thick frown in his forehead, refusing to look at her, “Fuck.” He whispered.
Claire’s eyes widened, “Atlas! No,” She held up her finger, “you promised me you’d never say it again.” Her cheeks flamed up as the parents next to her had definitely heard that. Atlas shrugged while staring at the tips of his worn-out sneakers, “You say it all the time.”
“I’m an adult.” Claire sighed before scratching above her brow. Her hair was in a low bun and she wore jeans and a large hoodie, “Look, just go inside, hm? Class is about to begin, don’t want you to be late.”
Atlas didn’t look at her anymore, simply turned around and walked off. A lump formed in Claire’s throat as she watched him, and her hands fiddled with the sleeves of her jumper, “I love you! Have a good day!” She called after him, but he didn’t react. Exhaling a shaky breath, Claire tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.
“Hi!” She heard the voice from next to her, “Are you Atlas’ mum?”
Claire forced a smile, staring at the perfectly done make-up of one of the mums next to her, “Hi.” She nodded, “Yes, I’m Claire. Nice to mee you.”
“Hi, I’m Dolores.” The woman smiled back with her pearly white teeth, “One of my girls is in Atlas’ class. Betty.”
“Oh,” Claire raised her brows, “yeah, I think Atlas has mentioned her.”
Another mum joined the conversation, “So you’re Atlas’ mum, hm? We all thought it was that gothic sixteen year old.” She laughed, referring to Belle and her dark make-up and black clothes. Claire pressed her lips together, “No, that’s just his sitter. She lives in the building with us, so it’s easy.”
“Hm.” The third woman simply nodded, “Well, me and Dolores are off to have some coffee. Would you care to join?”
Claire forced a smile, “Thank you for the offer, but I have to get to work. It was nice to meet you.” She shot an awkward wave and turned around, stopping dead in her tracks when she near bumped into Harry. Claire was only eye level with his chest and shortly looked up, sending him a nod, “Hi.” She went to stride past him but Harry stopped her, turning around with her, “Nice outfit.”
She could hear the judgement in his voice and rolled her eyes before turning to face him, “Look, I could really do without all those comments of yours. I thanked you for looking after Atlas on Friday, there’s really no need for you to behave like that.” She crossed her arms in front of her chest while firmly keeping her feet on the ground. Harry wore a loose, grey cable knit jumper and some blue jeans that hung loosely around his legs. His hair was back in that little clip to keep it away.
The other mums were out of earshot and Harry frowned, taking a step closer to Claire, “Excuse me?”
“You heard me.” She stood her ground although her voice wavered, “I know you think you’re better than me. And you probably are. Sue me for working a lot so I can provide for my kid. Sometimes it happens that I lose track of time or that I cover a shift. ” She bit before turning around and stomping off.
Harry watched her, scoffing under his breath. His eyes lingered as the blonde walked up to her horribly parked car, near flipping of another driver who honked at her for crossing randomly. The car moved from how harshly she slammed the door shut before she drove off. He shook his head to himself. That reckless driving with a six year-old next to her was dangerous.
He turned back with his hands in his pockets, feeling the eyes of the other mums on him. Harry was basically the only father who made it to drop-off moments. It caused most of the other mums to shoot their shot somehow and flirt with him, which he always rolled his eyes at.
He shot Finn one last wave, watching as he hurried up to walk next to Atlas. Both immediately broke out into a grin and Harry sighed, part of him wishing Finn could’ve found another friend in class. Finn was a little quiet and timid, which is why it surprised Harry that he gravitated towards someone as loud and extraverted as Atlas.
Before Atlas transferred schools, Finn never really mentioned many of his classmates. He often played by himself and never asked to invite anyone over for a playdate. Ever since a few weeks, he talked about Atlas all the time.
So when Harry saw the little blonde boy, waiting for his mum who had promised to pick him up, he took it upon himself to take him home and care for him until they got a hold of one of his parents. He had overheard the teachers talking about it, and only one name was on the call sheet.
Claire Carter.
A blonde-haired hurricane who showed up at his door by the time it was dark. The muted brown of her Burger King-outfit didn’t fit her or compliment her in any way. Even from the distance, Harry could see the fire in her eyes, hidden by a lot of fatigue.
But he didn’t really care in that moment. She had put her child in danger, and Harry could never imagine forgetting to pick up Finn from school or not notifying the teacher. He simply couldn’t understand how that happened.
He wasn’t able to keep his snide remarks down, somehow feeling so frustrated with her that she was so casual about fucking forgetting her child.
But he had quickly developed a soft spot for Atlas. Partly because he was making feel Finn so at ease, and partly because he was just a funny, goofy and playful kid. Harry had overheard them as they played together, and he constantly asked Finn questions. Asking how he was doing, asking if he felt okay, asking if he had a good day at school. It was gentle and caring.
Until he had heard Atlas slipping in a curse word and Harry’s eyes had widened tremendously.
After meeting his mum, he wasn’t really all that surprised anymore.
***
“Booze?” Harry frowned as Claire handed him the bottle of scotch.
She sheepishly shrugged, “You don’t drink?”
“Uh – no, I do.” Harry breathed, eyeing the label and seeing some knock-off version of cheap scotch. He cleared his throat, “’S just a bit of a weird gift to thank someone for looking after your kid.”
“Well, I didn’t know what to get you. Don’t think you need another stick to push up your ass.” Claire muttered and Harry glared at her, “Anything else?”
They were back in the same position. Claire was on the grass in front of Harry’s house as he stood in the doorway after Finn and Atlas ran inside. It was a Saturday and even though Claire had felt excited about spending a day with Atlas, he had asked her for a playdate with Finn.
And so here she was, dropping him off at his best friend’s house.
“No.” She breathed, “Not really. You’re just going to text me if I can come pick him up?”
Harry nodded, “Sure. Any allergies or something I need to be aware of for lunch?”
“No, he’s all good. Not a big fan of spinach if you were considering that.” Claire informed him. Harry softly nodded, “Fine then, bye.” He closed the door and Claire huffed, shaking her head. She hoped for Atlas’ sake that Finn wasn’t as much of a bitch as his father.
But disaster struck the moment Claire got in her car and tried to start it, only for her car the make the most pathetic noise and shut down.
“No.” She groaned, “God, please, no.” She tried again, jamming her key in it only to receive no response. Claire sat in the driver’s seat for a good ten minutes, simply refusing to get out and knock on Harry’s door again to ask him for help. She refused. Stubbornly, she sat in the seat until she got too bored and
Finally pushing her pride aside, she got out of the car in the scorching sun. Her arms crossed in front of her, she sighed while ringing Harry’s door again. He opened up with that same frown, “Forgot something?”
“I never left.” Claire deadpanned, “My car’s dead. Won’t start. Can I come inside to call a mechanic? It’s boiling.”
“I can feel that. ‘S like an oven.” Harry glanced outside before opening up the door wider, “Fine, come in.”
“Thank you.” She breathed. Harry cringed at her sandy shoes as she strolled through his hallway and straight into the kitchen like she had been here a billion times before. “Where are the kids?” She questioned while sitting down on a barstool.
“Yeah, make yourself at home, why don’t you.” Harry sarcastically spoke before leaning against the counter, “Upstairs. Finn’s got a playroom.”
“A playroom.” Claire nodded while scrolling her phone while searching for a mechanic, “Fancy.”
“Had to do something with my ex’s empty art studio.”
The comment made Claire flick her eyes up. Harry was staring out the window with his arms crossed. The stubble was more prominent now than a week before and the sun coming through definitely accentuated his prominent jaw and the shape of his lips. Claire put her phone down as she leaned her arms on the countertop, “Want to talk about it?”
Harry huffed softly, “No. Did you find a mechanic yet?”
“Do you know anyone in this neighbourhood? That I can like… afford.” Claire muttered the last part and Harry pressed his lips together, “Yeah, I’ll call my car guy. Don’t have to worry about money.”
“Your car guy?”
“Mhm.” Harry was on his phone, a concentrated frown on his forehead. Claire tilted her head to the side, “That’s… I mean, how often do you need a car guy?”
“Just sometimes.” Harry shrugged, “The old beetle outside gives up every once in a while. I call him and he comes here, it’s easy.”
“Both cars are yours?” Claire asked in clarification, and Harry hummed, “Yes.”
“Wow.” She mumbled, nodding to herself, “Must be nice.”
Harry rolled his eyes at her remark and then called his car guy, sharing a few quick words with him before hanging up again, “He’ll be here soon.”
Claire nodded, “Don’t you have jumper cables?”
“No, my car guy does.”
“Right.” She breathed. They were left in silence for a bit as the coffee was running. Harry hadn’t asked her if she wanted any, but poured her a cup either way and Claire didn’t complain. The longer the silence lasted, the more comfortable it became as both scrolled on their phones for a bit, the occasional sigh coming from Harry’s mouth.
Giggles and small feet carried themselves through the hallway.
“Daddy!!” Finn bubbled as both him and Atlas ran into the kitchen. Harry’s brows raised at the sight of his son, “Bub, where’s your shirt?”
“Atlas and I want to swim!” He ignored the question and Harry chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck, “Now?”
Atlas excitedly jumped, “Swim!”
“Atlas.” Claire chuckled while shaking her head, “You don’t know how to swim.”
Harry flicked his eyes to hers, “He can’t swim?” And Claire shook her head, “No, he hasn’t been taught yet.”
“Hm.” Harry exhaled, “Uh – well, I have floaties. Finn, you should use them too.”
“But, daddy!” The boy whined, “I can swim!” He stomped his foot down and Harry huffed, “In a kiddie pool. Not in a pool this deep.”
Finn pouted and Claire fought her smile at how adorable he looked, “But, daddy…” He tried again, “you always come in the pool with me and swim with me and throw me around and then save me.” He explained. Claire’s lips curled up in a smile, “Oh, do you?” She flicked her eyes to Harry who scoffed slightly before crouching down to Finn’s level, “Buddy, I have to fix something with Atlas’ mum’s car, so I can’t come in the pool right now. Besides, I have some work to do in the office. I thought you guys would be nice and quiet for me today?”
“We can be quiet in the pool.” Atlas butted in and Harry shook his head, “It’s gonna be a no. I can’t supervise when you guys are in the pool and it’s too dangerous.”
“Mummy,” Atlas whispered, tugging on Claire’s sleeve. She turned to face him as Harry ruffled Finn’s hair, who couldn’t hide the disappointment for the life of him.
“Yes?” She smiled at Atlas, who nibbled his lip a little, “Why don’t we have a pool?”
Claire took a breath, “Because we live in an apartment.”
“Yeah.” Atlas lowered his eyes, “But I like being outside. Finn has a very big garden to play in.”
Claire’s heart clenched as she exhaled before pressing her lips together. Atlas looked at her with big, green eyes, expecting an answer she couldn’t give him. Claire couldn’t tell him she also really wanted a house with a garden and a pool and a dog, giving Atlas the room he craved to play and be wild. He had a lot of energy and no real way to get rid of that in their small, dingy apartment.
Harry saved her though, clearing his throat, “Atlas, you can borrow swimming trunks from Finn. You guys get in the pool for a while once I grab the floaties.” The cheers sounded loudly through the room even though Harry wasn’t finished yet, “Only for a little while!” He held his finger up, “I have to work!”
Before the final word had left his lips, Finn and Atlas had bolted out of the room and back up the stairs and Harry let out a sigh, checking his watch. Claire followed his gaze, noticing his bony fingers tapping on the countertop in thought. The veins wrapping around his arm led her eyes up to the tattoos on his skin.
“I can stay too.” She offered, taking a sip of her coffee.
Harry seemed snapped out of his thoughts, “Hm?”
Claire cleared her throat, “I can stay too. You said you need to get work done and I have a free day. I can stay by the pool with the boys. I don’t mind, if you don’t have the time for it.”
“I want to have the time for it.” Harry clarified and Claire nodded, “I know. But it’s fine if you don’t. You can’t have time for everything.”
Harry scratched his jaw in thought, “I don’t have like bathing suits here. Astrid took all her stuff.”
Astrid.
Claire shrugged, “I’m wearing black underwear. Decent enough, not like… a thong or anything.” She mumbled. Harry fought the flaming of his cheeks before huffing out a chuckle, “Or you could stay by the edge and just put your legs in.”
“Atlas doesn’t know how to swim. Floaties or not, I’m getting in the water with him.” Claire frowned.
Harry sighed and nodded, “Yeah. I mean – uh… If you don’t mind? I really have a project to finish today, I have to meet the deadline or I’m losing this client.”
“What is it that you do exactly?”
“I’m an architect.” Harry mumbled, clearly still lost in thought at Claire’s offer. He nibbled his lip as she nodded, digesting the information. It made sense. Harry worked from home and on his own schedule, which meant he was free to drop Finn off and pick him up from school all the time.
“And you didn’t have any other plans today? On your free day?”
Claire let out a breath, “I – uh… Seeing as Atlas asked for this playdate, I actually planned an actual date this afternoon.” She tilted her head to the side while squinting her eyes at her screen, “But judging by this guy’s texts… he’s about to cancel on me either way so, yeah.” She sighed and put her phone back down, forcing Harry a small smile.
He whistled teasingly, “A date, hm? Spicy.”
“Not all of us are a hundred years old.” She rolled her eyes and Harry huffed out a laugh, “How old do you think I am, Claire?” The playfulness in his tone was something Claire wasn’t used to from him. The Harry she had seen so far in their previous encounters, was uptight and moody. His dimple popped in his left cheek as he smirked slightly.
She faked a small smile back, “Considering your gigantic frown lines, I’d say nearing your forties.”
“Ouch.” Harry placed his hand on his chest, “You wound me. Thirty-four, actually, but thanks. I’ll make some changes to my skincare routine. Noted.”
Claire giggled and shook her head, “I was kidding.”
“Funny girl, aren’t you?”
Claire flicked her eyes up, sensing a shift in Harry’s tone. He had lose the tension in his shoulders, softly smirking at her now from the opposite side of the kitchen as he leaned against the countertop. She lowered her eyes again and Harry cleared his throat, “So, going on a date, hm? First date?”
“Yes.” Claire breathed, “First and last date, which is how it usually goes.”
“Why?”
“Oh, you know,” She shrugged, her fingers toying together, “I show up in a pretty dress and flirt and play them a little. It’s all fun and games in the beginning until the real conversations start and it comes up that I’m a mother, raising Atlas by myself.”
Harry slowly nodded and Claire smiled, “You know, they’re usually fine with me having a son. Like, that’s alright mostly. But once they realize I don’t have a week-week schedule with my ex and actually have Atlas near every day, that’s where they draw the line. Like they don’t want to share.” She shrugged, “So that’s where it ends. I’m lucky if I can get some decent sex out of it. Which doesn’t happen often.”
Harry sputtered out a laugh at her bluntness before shaking his head to himself, “Wow. Yeah, I see why it sticks to one date. I could never be with someone who doesn’t appreciate Finn or doesn’t want to spend time with him.”
“It’s a package deal.”
He nodded in agreement, “Sure is.”
Claire leaned her elbow on the countertop and stared at him, “How about you?”
“Me?” Harry chuckled, shaking his head, “Nah. Eternal bachelor.”
She frowned while smiling, “I don’t believe that for a second. I know I’ve only been there to drop off Atlas once, but I could see all those soccer moms making eyes at you.”
“They’re all married.” He rolled his eyes, “And not my type.”
“Rich and beautiful is not your type?” Claire chuckled and Harry shrugged, “Apparently not.”
Silence fell over them again until Harry took a breath, “I’m gonna head up to the office. Grab whatever you want from the fridge or anything. There’s sunscreen in the bathroom and obviously the pool is outside. I’ll go grab the floaties from Finn’s room.”
“Yeah, okay.” Claire nodded. She checked her phone again, just seeing the message come in of her date, cancelling on her and asking to reschedule. She puckered her lips, remembering how he was some hot shot at an up and coming lawyer firm. She didn’t exactly expect him to have time for her on a Saturday.
With Harry’s footsteps heading up the stairs, Claire slowly got up from her barstool and roamed the kitchen. She stared out the window, seeing the pale blue pool in the large garden. It looked inviting, she had to admit. Even if it was nearing the end of September, it was exceptionally warm.
The house felt silent with both boys and Harry upstairs, and Claire’s feet took her to the crispy white living room. Every piece of furniture here looked like it was made by designers and she was nearly scared to touch anything. There weren’t much toys here and then Claire remembered Finn having a playroom upstairs.
As her eyes darted over the pictures on the wall, they stayed put on the brunette in some of the frames. There were about two of her and a younger Finn. The other ones were of Harry and Finn, or a standalone Finn.
Claire figured it was Astrid, Harry’s ex. She was beautiful, obviously. Looking at Finn, he was a gorgeous little boy with obvious great genes.
Just a few minutes later, Claire was outside with both excited boys. Finn and Atlas were around the same size, with Atlas just being a tad taller. Both wore little swimming trunks with either ducks or boats on them and stood perfectly still as Claire put sunscreen on them.
She didn’t see Harry staring at them from the window above. His laptop was open and he was drawing, he really was. Or he tried to. But he stood against the windowsill up on the first floor, staring down the length of his garden. The water of the pool looked inviting and he could see Finn’s wide grin from a mile away.
Claire grinned too, her blonde hair pinned back now with one of Harry’s ballpoints holding it together. It was inventive, he had to give her that. Her hands smoothed over Finn’s back to put the product on him before she gently slid the floaties around the boy’s arms. They both patiently waited at the edge of the pool, excited to jump in.
Harry’s leg twitched a little when his eyes were on her. She kicked off her shoes, a pair of mom jeans on her legs that she popped. The dryness in his throat once she slid the pants down her legs, was something Harry didn’t anticipate. Black underwear was revealed. Simple cotton with just a small lace border.
Harry thanked his impeccable eyesight to see every detail of Claire from a distance. She was shaped beautifully, with curvy thighs and a dip in her waist which was revealed as she lifted the navy top over her head to reveal an equally black bra.
He saw hints of a tattoo on the back of her shoulder, but Claire moved too quickly for Harry to notice it. Urging the boys to get in the pool, she elegantly got in with them.
A small smile tugged on Harry’s lips as he watched the first few minutes of their playing. Atlas and Finn mostly splashed around, ruining Claire’s plans to keep her hair dry. She tossed the ballpen to the side, ducking underneath the water to get in all the way.
She played with Atlas a bit, and Finn too. He laughed loudly as Claire threw him around a little bit, playing gently with him. They did a bit of a race where she purposely let him win while Atlas splashed a little more, without his swimming experience.
It was hours later, when Claire was fresh out of the pool and drying on the sunbed – with both boys running around the garden and giggling – that she felt a towel being dropped on her stomach. Her eyes snapped open in surprise and she squinted, Harry blocking the sunlight a little, “Hi.” He chuckled.
“Oh, hi.” She smiled, sitting up a bit and grabbing the towel, “Thank you.”
“’S fine.” His eyes glanced around the garden, “Did they have fun?”
Claire wrapped the towel around her to dry off, “Yeah. I don’t understand how they’ve got so much energy left, even I need a nap. Two is too much.”
“I’ve honestly never seen Finn this loud.” Harry smiled as his son ran through the garden with Atlas chasing him, “They’re pretty good friends.”
“They are.” Claire smiled as she followed his gaze, “Infectuous, really.”
“They didn’t give you too hard of a time?”
“Not at all. Finn’s a sweet a boy.”
Harry smiled as he nodded, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his pants, “He is.”
“How about you? Finished your project?”
“Yep.” Harry stretched his arms now, yawning a little, “I need a nap too.” He joked.
Claire got up with a mischievous glint in her eyes, the towel around her form as she took a few steps closer to Harry. He involuntary took a few back, but she was still close enough that he could see the freckles on her nose and the remains of an old scar above her brow.
“What are you doing?” He spoke in a strained voice, taking a few steps back still to create some distance. He could feel himself breaking out into a sweat when Claire just continued to step closer to him. “Claire.” He pushed.
“You know what’s a great substitute for a nap?” She purred, daring to take another step closer to him. She could inhale his perfume and Harry held his breath when she batted her lashes. He swallowed thickly, “Hm?”
“A dip in the water.” She smiled, using a hand that she placed against his covered chest to give him a shove back. Harry’s eyes widened as he lost his balance, “Wh- Wait!” He yelped, reaching his arm out. Claire laughed, hardly caring that Harry managed to take a hold of her wrist and pull her in. Unlike him – who made a gigantic splash as he tumbled down – Claire managed to get in a dive and dip in elegantly.
The coolness of the water did wake Harry up immediately and he sputtered out as he reached the surface, shaking his hair out with his clothes completely soaked. Claire was laughing as she quickly took the towel to throw it on the grass and get it out of the water.
“Oh my god!” Harry laughed, splashing water at Claire, who giggled. Harry flicked his eyes to their two boys who seemed unaware, chuckling as he shook his head, “You dick.”
Claire gasped in fake shock, “Are you cursing?”
Harry rolled his eyes as he swam back over to the side, pushing himself out of the pool. Claire was mesmerized for a second, watching the way his shirt clung to him. The muscles in his back bulged as he pushed himself up, showing off every ridge.
“Shit.” Harry chuckled, opening up the buttons of his shirt, “I can’t believe you pushed me in the pool. What are you, six?”
Claire grinned and also got out of the water, feeling Harry’s eyes on her as she wrung out her hair, “No, twenty-eight.”
“You wouldn’t say.”
Claire stuck out her tongue and Harry huffed out a chuckle, “Brat.” He scoffed, “’M gonna grab towels.” He turned around to head into the house, his pants soaking wet and his shirt off. The light reflected off his muscular back and Claire near drooled. Harry handed her another fluffy towel and both sat down on the sunbed.
“So around what time are you going to offer me a drink?” Claire teased and Harry hummed, “I don’t drink around Finn.”
“Well, ‘m not gonna get blind drunk but I wouldn’t say no to some pink wine.”
“Yeah, not blind drunk, just…” He shrugged, “I don’t want to give the wrong example.”
Claire leaned back on her hands, letting herself dry in the heat of the burning sun, “Having a drink every once in a while isn’t setting the wrong example, Harry. You’re an adult.” She shrugged, “I mean, it’s your own decision obviously, but it’s impossible to be responsible all the time around your child.”
“Responsible…” Harry mused, “Like remembering to pick them up from school?”
“Dick.” Claire chuckled, nudging her shoulder into his playfully. Harry grinned, staring at the pool as the boys played still. Harry had changed out of his pants and put on some swimming trunks this time, in case Claire decided to shove him in the pool again. His hair was wet and dripping down his back, sunglasses sitting on the bridge of his nose.
“Thank you again for that. Work just got… in the way.”
Harry turned his head to the side to watch her, “Don’t have to thank me again, that’s not why I said it. Was just making a joke.”
“I know.”
“You work a lot, don’t you? At Burger King?”
Claire exhaled a breath, “It’s not the most glamorous job and it doesn’t pay that much. But yes, I work a lot. I take a lot of shifts and often work weekends or late nights.”
“Is Atlas by himself when you work?”
“No,” Claire breathed, “I’m not that terrible of a mum.” Her voice held a hint of bitterness and she pressed her lips together, “There’s a young girl in my building who babysits for him. She’s like… seventeen maybe and she dropped out of school. She’s always available. The other mums said they’d seen her around to pick him up sometimes.”
“Oh, yeah…” Harry nodded, “like dark make-up, black hair?”
“Mhm, that’s Belle.”
“Isn’t it like… counter-productive? You have to pay her and then work while having to do so…”
“I earn more than whatever I have to pay her.” Claire mumbled, “Like I said, she’s not that expensive. I keep more than I have to give her.”
Harry nodded, “Right.” There was silence for a moment, “Look, ‘m sorry about giving you a hard time last week. I didn’t mean to like… shame you or anything.”
“No, I get it. It’s everyone’s first impression of me, trust me.” She chuckled, “That judgement is exactly why I pulled him out of his previous school, though. He heard people talking that I was never there, that I was leaving him on his own, that I wasn’t fit to be a parent. It’s painful because I’m really doing this all for him.”
Harry nodded again, listening to her. Claire fiddled with her fingers, “Like what he said about the pool earlier, you heard, right?"
“Mhm. I did.”
“Well, I want that too. I want to give him everything, I want him to have a nice childhood and I want to spend time with him. But I don’t have an education so I can’t really go for high-paying jobs. Just have to take what I can get and hope for flexible hours to be there for him.”
“You’re doing a lot, Claire.” Harry sympathized, “Seriously, ‘m sorry. I-I judged way too quick.”
“That’s fine.” She shot him a sly smile, “Happens when you’re old.”
Harry smiled and shook his head to himself, “And hey… I’ve got an idea. Why don’t you drop him off here whenever you have to work late or want some time for yourself? Finn and Atlas can spend time together, he could even stay the night if you want. And you don’t have to pay me.”
“What?” Claire frowned.
“I’m serious.” He shrugged, “It’s nice for Finn to have a friend. They’re joined at the hip.” Harry glanced over his shoulder to see both boys giggling together, a smile tugging on his lips, “I think they’d like it. He could eat here or I could grab him after school, bring him here. You can just come pick him up whenever you’re finished.”
Claire tilted her head to the side with a frown, “But… Don’t you have to work? Or go places?”
“Not really, to be honest.” Harry admitted, “I’m home all the time. A lot has changed since my divorce and I don’t have much of a social life anymore, just put Finn first. Wanted him to grow up with at least one present parent after all the arguing he had to witness as a baby. And I work for myself, got flexible hours. I work when he’s at school or when he goes to bed at night.”
Claire stared at him, “I-I mean… If you’re sure.”
“Of course.” Harry smiled, “Dead sure. You can even go on your dates on Saturday nights, or something.” He teased softly and Claire bit her lip, “You’re right. I can. I should text that guy to reschedule."
He hummed, “You can.” He then turned to face her, “So we’ve got a deal?”
Claire nibbled her lip, “And… you’d want nothing out of it?”
“No.” Harry shook his head, “Just doing it for Finn. And Atlas is a nice kid, Claire. He’s a good influence to bring Finn out of his shell.”
She smiled softly, her bubbly boy being a good influence made her so proud. “Okay. Then I guess we have a deal.”
They stupidly shook hands before bursting out in giggles. Claire hummed, bumping her shoulder into his again, “You’re not that bad, you know?”
“I know.” Harry playfully responded, “Neither are you."
“You’re the first mum-friend I’ve ever made in my life.”
“Oh god.” Harry groaned, “Don’t call me your mum-friend.”
Claire threw her head back in a laugh and Harry leaned back a little bit too, his eyes finally catching the ink on the back of Claire’s shoulder now that her hair dried a bit. He could see now, that it was a tattoo for Atlas. Literally a tattoo of Atlas, who carried the world. It was simple, and even a little disturbed with some dark bruises around it.
Harry swallowed, but decided not to comment on it.
***
“Hi, Harry!” Atlas bubbled as he waved at Harry. He was leaning against his car, sunglasses up his nose as he waved back, “Hi, bud.”
“Atlas!” Claire panted as she came running from across the street – having done another horrible parking job with her car. Harry smiled as she ran up to Atlas, crouching down to catch him in a hug. Atlas ran straight into her arms with a giggle and Claire hugged him, stroking his back, “Hi, baby. How was your day?”
“Good!” He smiled widely. Claire pressed a kiss to his cheek as she smiled.
“Bye Atlas! See you soon!” Finn’s voice sounded as he ran up to Harry, and Claire straightened up as she shot him a wave, “Oh, hi. Didn’t see you.”
Yeah, hey.” He smiled back, “Been here a while, I like to be early, Finn doesn’t like to wait.”
“Are you sure it’s still okay for tonight?”
He nodded, “Yep, ‘s fine.” Harry ruffled Atlas’ hair, “Gonna come over for a movie night, bud?”
“Can we watch Toy Story?!” Atlas excitedly gasped and Harry groaned a little under his breath, recovering quickly as he rolled his lips inside of her mouth, “Mhm.”
Claire chuckled, “Are you sure?” She softly asked him and Harry nodded again, “Positive, really. It’ll be fun.”
Her hair was up in a clip again, whisps of hair flying around. She wore a jumper even if it was boiling, and Harry could tell she was still wearing the Burger King shirt underneath, some of the muted brown sticking out of the neckline of her jumper. Claire took Atlas’ hand and waved at Harry and Finn, “See you tonight!”
“Bye!” Harry waved back, and Finn did too. As Harry urged Finn into the backseat, Dolores walked up to him. With her fresh bob-cut and perfect make-up, she sent him a smile, “Hi, Harry.”
“Dolores.” He nodded. She eyed him up and down, “Did I overhear you talking to Claire for a moment there?”
He pressed his lips together and nodded, “Mhm.” There was no point in lying about it, all eyes had been on them just a minute before. His eyes flicked to the other side of the street where Claire slammed her car door to drive off, not putting on her blinkers before she sped off. He wanted to roll his eyes at her driving behaviour but also knew he was super extreme with his careful driving.
“You know…” Dolores lowered her voice and came a little closer as Harry closed Finn’s car door. He straightened up and Dolores shortly glanced around, “There has been some talk. You know, a new mum… people always talk.” She shrugged as if it was the most normal thing. Harry stiffly nodded, “Naturally.” He vividly remembered all the gossip when word got around about what happened between him and Astrid.
“And well,” Dolores tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, “Natalie heard that Claire has a past in drug abuse.” She was near whispering now, “And that she was married to a dealer.”
Harry let out a soft sigh, “Right.” He hardly listened, if he was honest. He knew better. Word got around quickly here, but everything got changed and manipulated. He knew better than to believe everything he heard around this town.
Dolores cleared her throat, “And that she was using while being pregnant. That poor boy… I mean, it’s clear that he’s got ADHD, and that could be a result of her abusing drugs while pregnant.”
Harry refrained from rolling his eyes, “Dolores,” He sighed, “even if it’s true, who cares? It’s her life and it’s been six years since she was pregnant. Let’s not meddle.” He simply spoke, forcing her a small smile.
“I’m just warning you,” Dolores put her hand on Harry’s arm and he flicked his eyes down to the touch with a frown in his forehead. Dolores swallowed, “She’s around Finn, Harry. Think about the influence…”
Harry cleared his throat and pulled his arm away, walking around his car to get behind the wheel, “Bye, Dolores.”
She opened her mouth to say more, but Harry was already in his car with the door closed. He didn’t spare her another glance before he drove off.
A few hours later, someone rang his door. Claire was fiddling with the top button of her dress as she waited for Harry to open his door. Atlas was by her side, excited for his movie night here as she had rescheduled with her date for tonight.
She was sort of excited, it had been a while since she had gone out. Her work schedule didn’t allow her to and she wanted to spend most nights with Atlas. Knowing he wasn’t just in the apartment with Belle scrolling on her phone, but was spending time with his friends eased her guilt a little of leaving him alone.
The lock clicked as Harry appeared, flashing a grin at Atlas, “Hey!”
“Hi, Harry!” He grinned back before turning to Claire, “Bye, mummy!!” He hardly waited for her response before sprinting into the house he knew rather well by now. Claire chuckled, “Yeah, bye. Love you too.”
Harry leaned against the doorpost, shortly scanning her outfit. He was used to seeing Claire either in her Burger King outfit or in jeans and a shirt. Now, she wore a dress. And make-up. It was clear to him she was making an effort. The slippers on her feet made his brows raise though, “Is he super short or something?” He nudged his head towards her feet.
Claire followed his eyes, “Oh, no, I don’t think so. I just can’t drive in heels so I’ll switch my shoes when I arrive.” She explained, flipping her blonde hair over her shoulder, “By the way, if I’m done before midnight, I’m coming back over to pick him up.”
“In the middle of the night?” Harry frowned.
“Yeah, we sort of have our morning routing, Atlas and I. So I prefer picking him up and letting him sleep the rest of the night in his own bed. What time do you usually go to bed?”
Harry scratched his chin, “Yeah, around midnight.”
“Okay, but I’ll text you. Maybe he sucks and I’ll be back in an hour.”
His lips curled up in an amused smirk, “What’re dealbreakers to you, Claire?”
“I’d love to go over the list with you,” She grabbed a lipstick from her purse and blindly put it on, painting them a soft cherry red before rubbing them together, “but I’m going to be late if we get into that.”
Harry’s eyes zeroed in on Claire’s lips and he huffed out a chuckle, “Fine. Well, have fun. Be safe. Let me know when you’d come pick up Atlas.”
“Will do! Thank you.” Claire spun on her heel and headed back to her car, driving off the driveway to head to her date. Harry watched, feeling only slightly wary of her going by car instead of being picked up. He wondered if she’d drink during dinner and then drive, picking up Atlas to drive with him.
Dolores’ words ran through his head over and over again before he shook his head to himself and headed inside.
He checked his phone a few times, but Claire was actually having an okay time on her date. The guy who worked at the lawyer firm was charming and showed up in a suit. A bit stiff, Claire thought. And she was definitely underdressed. Her black dress looked classy but was cheap as fuck, and the buttons around her chest seemed near ready to pop.
His eyes were drawn to her tits most of the time as he drank the one scotch after the other. Their conversations started pleasantly and Claire got it out of the way first, immediately notifying him of the fact she had a six year-old son. He hadn’t responded much to it, just hummed and said it was cool.
As the evening progressed, Claire got a bit of an ick though. He seemed to talk mostly about herself and when he ended up not asking one single question about Atlas, Claire decided for herself that this was not it. He was near drunk once they finished their dinner and headed outside. He sloppily tried to kiss her and she turned him down, even having to stifle her laugh when he casually suggested they hook up just once.
He also called her a prude when she refused. Rolling her eyes, Claire got in her car. Before driving off, she quickly texted Harry.
Message to: Harry (Finn’s dad)
Coming back from the restaurant now, I’ll be there in twenty.
It was nowhere near midnight, but just past ten thirty in the evening. Claire had only been on her date a good few hours but it had felt like forever. With the window down, she drove up to Harry’s house again after another disappointing night. It had been the one shitty date after the other in the past few months.
Most lights in the house seemed off as Claire pulled up, getting out in her slippers and softly knocking on the door as to not alert the sleeping children. She heard footsteps, and soon Harry opened up. He looked a little sleepy and Claire suspected he had dozed off on the couch before she texted him that she was coming back.
“Hi.” She bit her lip, “Sorry, did I wake you?”
He stifled a yawn, “You didn’t. Put the boys to bed not too long ago and I was reading a little bit.” He opened the door wider for her, “Come in. How was the date?”
“Horrible.” Claire huffed, following him into the kitchen. Harry hummed, “Want some coffee? Or water? There’s also some dinner leftover if you want.”
“It actually smells so good in here.” Claire hummed, “If you’ve got any left, I’d like to.”
“Sure, I’ll heat some up. Tell me about the guy.”
Claire pushed herself up to sit on the countertop, “Well, he was just…” She shrugged, “Boring. And arrogant. He only talked about himself, was just overall rude and he drank so much, god… I hope he didn’t yet have to drive.”
Harry smiled softly at her words as he put a plate in the microwave. “How responsible of you.” He teased, repeating the words from last week that she had mocked him with. Claire smiled and rolled her eyes, “Hey, I have morals.”
“Hm.” Harry hummed, remembering Dolores’ words again. He turned around, “Here you go. Atlas really liked it.”
“Holy shit. Did you make this yourself?”
“Think I’ve got some private chef here, Claire?”
She shrugged, “Honestly, yes.” Her fork poked into a piece of chicken as she stuffed it in her mouth.
“Nah, I’m quite an okay cook. I like cooking actually.” Harry went to sit on the opposite countertop, his legs dangling over the edge as they were in the dimly lit kitchen, “Go on now, tell me five positive things about the date.”
“Five?” Claire’s eyes widened, “Uh…” She chewed for a bit, “well, one… he paid. So that was nice.” She narrowed her eyes in thought and Lennon chuckled softly, “Only one?”
“No, no, wait, let me think.” Claire shook her head, “Oh, well, he didn’t shame me when I wanted to have dessert. And when I said I had a kid, he said it was cool.”
“Cool?” Harry frowned, “That’s supposed to be a positive thing? The bar is very low.”
“It’s on the floor, let’s be honest.”
“So I assume it’s safe to say there won’t be a second date.”
Claire scrunched her nose, “Definitely not. He tried to kiss me and suggested sex.”
Harry’s brows raised, “Seriously? Bold.”
“You’d be surprised, dating isn’t the same as it was ten years ago.”
He hummed, “Apparently. Thank god I don’t have to go through that.” He shook his head to himself. He knew it could be brutal out there. Hell, Astrid had made it brutal for him. The thought of her left his stomach in clenches and he quickly pushed it all away.
“Harry, this is really good. Wow.” Claire near moaned as she ate more food and Harry smiled, “Thanks.” He felt proud at her compliment and shyly glanced down. Claire swallowed her bite, “So what did you three do tonight?”
“Watched Toy Story. Twice.”
Claire sputtered out a giggle, “No way.”
“Atlas is quite persuasive.” Harry chuckled, “But I was reading a little throughout. They were nice and quiet though, had some popcorn. They wanted to swim but I said no.”
“Stern.” Claire nodded and Harry shrugged, “Some might say, yes.”
Claire crossed her legs over one another and leaned back, “So… I’m curious. If you never go on a date, how long has it been since you’ve had sex?”
Harry chuckled to himself while shaking his head, “Nope. None of your business.”
Claire shrugged, “Fair enough.”
They sat in silence for a bit until Claire decided to head home. Harry guided her up the stairs to show the spare room where Atlas was sleeping. He was dazed until he laid eyes on his mum, a wide grin spreading over his face. Claire carried him downstairs and gently put him in the car before thanking Harry again and driving off.
***
“Thank you so much for watching him.” Claire breathed as she was at the door in her Burger King outfit. She looked exhausted, Harry noticed. Her hair was a little messy and she had bags under her eyes. It was a Thursday and almost a week after she had dropped Atlas off here to go on her date.
He hadn’t seen much of her throughout the week, or just shortly to pick up Atlas after school. Today, she had to pick up another shift so Harry took Atlas home after school to hang out with Finn.
“’S no problem.” Harry shrugged, “I’ve told you, Atlas is a nice kid to have around. He’s polite.”
“Yeah.” Claire tiredly smiled, “Can you go grab him?”
Harry scratched the back of his neck, “Mhm. Or – uh… we were just about to have dinner. You can join if you want.”
“That’s really nice,” Claire sighed, “but you’re already doing way too much for us. And I desperately need to shower.”
“I have showers.” He shrugged.
“Showers? Multiple?”
He chuckled, “Yes. C’mon,” he urged her, nodding his head inside the house, “it’ll be nice for the boys.”
It’s what he went with. That it was nice for the boys. Really trying to ignore the fact that it’d be nice for him too. Claire was easy to talk to and not as uptight or fake like all the other mums in the school. She was blunt and unapologetic, but very straightforward and without bullshit. He appreciated that now, whereas he didn’t at first.
She was trying her best, he could see that.
Claire eventually caved, nodding her head. She wore that horrific Burger King fit and Harry showed her where everything was in the bathroom, handing her a pair of joggers and a shirt of his.
The four of them sat around the dinner table later, with Claire only being slightly uncomfortable at how underdressed and casual she was. The clothes Harry handed her felt nice and soft, but she wasn’t used to having dinner in pyjamas with wet hair laying on her back and with anyone else besides Atlas.
“I have a question,” Harry popped, narrowing his eyes at Claire, “Do you ever eat burgers?”
She chuckled, shaking her head, “Absolutely not. Can’t stand burgers anymore. Besides, I see how they’re made and let me tell you… it’s a big no. I’m in the smell of it all day and I just…” She shuddered, “Nope.”
They fell silent again with just Finn and Atlas whispering something to one another until Finn nodded and cleared his throat, “Claire?” He spoke in a small, soft voice. Claire swallowed her bite and turned, “Yes?”
Finn looked a little nervous, shifting in his chair as he put his fork down and a slight flush rose over his cheeks, “Atlas said I could come to your house.”
Claire frowned slightly, shortly flicking her eyes to Atlas before clearing her throat, “I’m… what?”
“We always come here. I want to show Finn where we live.” Atlas piped up. Claire felt her cheeks heating up a little bit in embarrassment as she stared at her plate. Harry hummed, “That could be fun. Maybe we could all have dinner at your place?”
Claire licked her lip, refusing to look him in the eye, “That’s…well, that’s not possible. I-I don’t have a table that can fit four people.” She mumbled softly. Her shoulders slumped a little bit and Harry paused mid-chew to watch her as she kept her eyes on the food in her plate.
“Atlas, baby, we don’t really have the room for you and Finn to play the way you can here, right?” She softly spoke to her son.
Atlas pouted and Claire forced him a small smile, “Maybe some other time, yeah?”
“But I want to show him where we live.” Atlas murmured in a trembling voice, nearly on the verge of tears. Claire turned to him and kept her voice soft, “I know. But you know how mummy always says we won’t live there for too long? Because it’s so small and loud and dark?” She near whispered to Atlas, who nodded and sniffled once, “Well, maybe we should wait until we live somewhere nicer.��
“Are you poor?” Finn’s voice sounded curious and Claire’s eyes widened.
“Finn!” Harry scolded in shock, “You can’t ask people that!”
Finn looked completely horrified at the sudden volume his father used to talk to him. He stared at Harry with large, green eyes and even his lip was trembling, “B-But Atlas comes to school with dirty clothes.” He near whispered, sounding nervous. Claire’s stomach dropped and Finn sniffled again, “And we share my lunch because he’s still hungry after his.”
“Stop!” Harry snapped, his fist coming down on the table. Finn jumped up with a gasp in surprise and then burst into tears, scrambling from the table to run off. Claire held her breath as she stared at Harry, his fist clenched as he exhaled a sharp breath, “Shit.” He grumbled under his breath.
Claire swallowed and turned to Atlas, “Do you want to go check up on Finn, baby? Tell him his daddy’s not mad at him and neither am I? That we’re all okay?”
Atlas also seemed surprised with Harry’s outburst and timidly nodded before leaving the table to find Finn in the house. The moment he was out of sight, tears spilled from Claire’s eyes. She turned her head away from Harry, hiding it as she hastily wiped underneath her eyes. Her fingers trembled, repeating in her head what Finn had said.
That Atlas showed up with dirty clothes to school and not enough lunch, to the point he was still hungry and ate from the other kid’s lunchboxes.
“Claire.” Harry exhaled and she ignored him, her brain spinning. She was trying so hard. And all this time, she thought she had been doing good. That Atlas was at least happy even if they didn’t have all that much. But people talked, and soon enough the same thing would happen like it had done in his three previous schools. Word would get around, parents would tell their kids not to hang out with him and he’d be bullied.
Harry scooted his chair closer to hers, “Claire,” He repeated, “look at me.”
She pressed her lips together and flicked her eyes up. Harry noticed the wetness in her waterline, the red rimming around her lids. She was exhausted and sad, and it was written all over her face. He wasn’t sure what to do, so gently patted her knee, “I’m sorry.”
“No,” She shook her head, “it’s not his fault. I just – uh… I didn’t know.” She simply shrugged, staring down again, “We’re always in such a hurry in the mornings a-and I just grab whatever clothes of his I can find. And sometimes I don’t have time to do laundry in the weekends. And I swear, he fucking grows all the time, it’s like I have to buy new shirts every other week.” She tiredly scratched her forehead.
Harry listened to her soft rambling and Claire shook her head, “He’s never complained.” Her voice was a little raspy, “about being hungry, or not having enough food. He’s never mentioned it to me.”
“I’m sure Finn was exaggerating.” Harry murmured back, holding his hand on her knee now to give a gentle squeeze, “It maybe happened once. He’s an energized kid who eats a lot, I’ve noticed it here too. I’m sure that if he truly was hungry after lunch every single day, he would’ve told you. You guys are close, right?”
“Yeah.” Claire nodded, “He usually tells me everything.”
“See? I’m sure it’s not that bad. And so what he has a stain on his shirt? He’s a wild kid, always playing and running around… he’s bound to fuck up his clothes.”
Claire listened to him and really tried to hear him, but fresh tears welled in her eyes, “I’m really trying, Harry.” Her tone was shaky and he cooed, “I know. Fuck, I know. I can see it first-hand.”
“Shit.” Claire murmured as she buried her face in her hands and her shoulders trembled in quiet sobs. Harry squeezed her knee and then moved his hand up to her shoulder, “Hey, c’mere.” He urged her to stand up and Claire did so, letting herself be pulled into his chest for a hug. Her forehead was pressed to his clavicle as she sobbed into him, Harry’s arms rubbing up her back to comfort her and shush her softly.
“You’re doing incredible, Claire. And Atlas loves you so much.” He held her body to his, feeling as she weakly cried, both in exhaustion and in feeling powerless. It was a few minutes later that Harry swallowed, “And if you ever need help with money or anything…” He knew the moment he said it, that she’d refuse.
Claire sniffled and shook her head while being pressed to him, “We’ll be fine.”
“O-Or maybe your parents or something?”
“They cut me off. I haven’t been in contact with them since they knew I was pregnant.” Her voice was soft and Harry pressed his lips together, giving her another squeeze, “And doesn’t your ex need to pay? For Atlas?”
Claire sighed out into his neck, “You’d think so. The lawyers are working on it because he refuses to pay. But those things take so long, I’m not even hopeful anymore I’ll ever see a dime.”
It made Harry hate him even more. He had heard little bits about Evan, Atlas’ dad, from Finn. Not much, nothing detailed, just that Atlas didn’t see him that much and that he lived in the area. Any piece of information that Harry found out, made his blood boil. He couldn’t understand how he wouldn’t make an effort to hang out with Atlas, who was such a fun little boy to be around. Harry found there was nothing more satisfying than watching his son grow up and he couldn’t imagine missing it for the life of him.
“Well, you can always ask me. I won’t question it.” Harry concluded and Claire sniffled, “Thank you.”
They stood embraced for another good few minutes until Claire untangled herself, “I’m fine.” She took a breath, through most of her crying as she shot Harry an unconvincing smile, “I’ll be fine.”
“I know.” He nodded.
***
Message from: Claire
He’s wearing boat shoes. I don’t know what to do.
Harry chuckled at the screen of his phone as Finn had his head laying in his lap. Atlas was curled up in the couch too, eyes glued to the screen as they were having another Friday movie night. And Claire was out on a date.
It was nearing November now, and their little deal had been going on for a few months. Claire didn’t go out every weekend, but at least every other weekend. And Harry took Atlas here for the night to hang out with Finn so she could go on her date.
It was safe to say that it usually wasn’t that big of a success. Claire would text him underneath the table about all the horrible things they’d say or do and then come here to pick up Atlas. It resulted in at least an hour of gossiping and laughing before she eventually left and he’d watch her drive off in the darkness of the night.
Message to: Claire.
What colour are they?
His phone soon buzzed with a response.
Message from: Claire.
Who cares!! We’re in the city, not on a fucking boat!
Harry laughed again, shaking his head to himself as he stroked his fingers through Finn’s hair. He had a book next to him but found himself almost more interested in the movie playing. Tangled. It wasn’t half bad, to be honest.
Harry hardly noticed it as Atlas crawled closer to him until bumping his head into Harry’s bicep. He glanced to his side to see the blonde-haired little boy with half-tired eyes, cuddled into a blanket.
Harry hesitated for a moment before opening his arm and Atlas didn’t wait a second, simply nuzzled into Harry’s side with a content sigh. Harry’s heart felt full, with Atlas cuddled into him on one side and Finn resting on his lap. He gently stroked his fingers over Atlas’ head and the boy melted into him even more. There was trust here, after weeks and weeks of spending time together. Atlas was incredible, Harry had come to find out. He was clever and witty, making Finn laugh louder than Harry had ever heard.
Atlas was definitely more on the mischievous side where Finn was rather timid and quiet, but they compensated the other very well. And had grown to be very close friends.
Harry’s phone buzzed softly.
Message from: Claire.
Okay, I’m out of here. He just asked how much I make a month and if I can get him free burgers.
Harry snorted softly and typed back.
Message to: Claire.
Yeah, sounds like your cue to leave. You can catch the final bit of the movie if you’re lucky.
The movie progressed and before Harry truly and well realized it, the three of them were dozed off on the couch. Only when he heard the soft footsteps in the house – after he had showed Claire where he kept the spare key – did his eyes blink open.
Claire watched him with an amused smile, eyes darting over Atlas and Finn who were both asleep on parts of his body.
“This is cute.” She whispered. Harry yawned softly, “Sorry, fell asleep.”
“I can see that.” She sat down on the couch next to Atlas and stroked his back, “Baby?”
Atlas nuzzled further into Harry and Claire shook her head with a smile, “He’s taking the moment to his advantage.”
“He can’t cuddle you like that?”
“No,” Claire exhaled, “hurts my boobs.”
Harry chuckled, “Right. So I take it the date wasn’t a success?”
“A big fat no.” Claire sighed, “God, where am I supposed to meet a decent guy these days. I swear, every app I have downloaded has only lead me to horrible evenings like this. Maybe I should just stay single forever.”
“Yeah, come over to the dark side. It’s fun here.” Harry joked and Claire leaned back in the couch. She wore a sundress with sleeves tonight, pushing it a little in these rather cold temperatures. But Harry had yet to see her in pants whenever she went on a date, it was always a dress.
“So boat shoes…” Harry mused and Claire groaned, “I know.”
“Well, at least it wasn’t flip-flops. Like that guy you went out with a few weeks back.”
“Am I supposed to see the silver lining here?”
Harry smiled and it was quiet for a moment, “You want a drink? Or some food?”
Claire yawned, “No, thanks. I think we’re just going to go home.”
“Really?” His voice jumped a little, “I mean,” Harry shrugged while clearing his throat, “you could stay a bit. Or sleep in the guest room with Atlas. He’s asleep anyway.”
“Harry,” Claire laughed, “I know we’re friends but we’re a bit too old for sleepovers, no?”
Friends.
Well, that hurt.
Harry didn’t protest when Claire gently woke Atlas up, who immediately cuddled into her instead. She kissed his forehead, “Wanna go home?”
“Mhm.” He sleepily responded. Claire picked him up, wincing a bit at the ache in her back. Atlas weighed a bit too much to still be carried by her, but he was too sleepy. Harry gently nudged Finn off, who didn’t wake and rested on a pillow instead, before he let Claire and Atlas out.
“Bye.” He waved in a whisper and Claire waved back once she put Atlas in the passenger seat, “Bye!”
Harry groaned to himself once Claire was out of sight. Friends. Friends. God damn it. He knew it. He had let it go on for too long and now he was friendzoned. He was literally her mum-friend, the one she gossiped to about other guys. Holy fuck.
Harry ran his palms over his face and sighed out, picking up Finn from the couch to carry him to bed and then go to sleep himself.
With the colder temperatures approaching, the next few weeks consisted of thicker clothes and spending less time outside. It got a bit harder for Harry to entertain the boys as they couldn’t go in the pool or play outside too much. It was basically waiting for snow now.
December just rolled in and Harry was sitting in his car, waiting for Finn to be done with school and to take him home. He used to always wait outside his car but it was too cold now, so he waited inside. His eyes scanned the street in search of Claire’s old Toyota. They had seen each other on Friday after she came back from another date, dressed in heels, stockings and a skirt. It was a cute look on her, accentuating her figure.
She said it wasn’t horrible this time but there wasn’t really a connection there, so it would stick to the one date. Harry hummed at that, and he couldn’t really say he minded all that much. He found himself looking forward to her texts, or the moments she’d come home after another disappointment of a date, spilling to him. Even if he was in the friend zone, it still cheered him up to see her.
Dare he say, it was the highlight of his week right now.
So he scanned the streets, not seeing her car. Not when the bell rang and the children were let out. Harry exited his car, a wide grin on his face as Finn ran over to him excitedly.
“Hi, m’love.” Harry crouched down to take Finn into a hug, spotting a blonde head of hair in the corner of his eye. He patted Finn on the shoulder, “Do we need to take Atlas home today?”
Finn shook his head, “No, he said someone’s picking him up.”
Harry frowned slightly, scanning the line of parents until he spotted Atlas, walking over to a girl with black hair and a cigarette between her fingers. She hardly paid him attention and his head was a little low. Soon enough, they made way to the bus station and disappeared from sight.
Harry refrained from texting Claire that night. It could be crossing a line, asking if she was okay. They had never really done that before and usually texted in a very casual way or to discuss picking up Atlas.
He didn’t see her the remainder of the week and it was nearing Christmas break now. Although Harry vowed to never pull his kid into this, he couldn’t help himself but question Finn on Friday.
“So… Are you sad that Atlas hasn’t been here all week?” He asked as they were having dinner, just the two of them.
Finn shrugged. He wasn’t a kid to speak out of line, which is why the poor-comment he made about Claire shocked Harry so much. He had raised Finn to be very polite and respectful. He had taught him that whenever a friend told him a secret, he were to keep it to build an keep the trust. It’s why he felt like guilty now, prying.
“He said it’s busy at home.” Finn answered and Harry flicked his eyes to him, “Busy?”
“Mhm.” Finn nodded, “With his mummy. He says she’s not feeling too well so he stays with her.”
Harry slowly nodded, “That’s nice of him.”
“It is.” Finn agreed.
Silence fell over the dinner table and Harry cringed at himself, unable to let the topic go, “Did Finn mention why Claire’s feeling a little poorly?”
Finn softly shrugged as he poked his food, “He says her face hurts.”
Harry near dropped his fork, stomach twisting in discomfort as he heard the words coming from Finn’s mouth. He softly cleared his throat, “Her face hurts?”
Finn was more interested in his food, simply nodding as he continued eating and Harry finally dropped it. He had a pretty clear idea as to why Claire’s face would hurt. He tightly gripped his fork, staring at his phone on the table in contemplation whether or not to text her. If it was crossing a line.
They had known each other for months now but never really dipped into that part of their friendship – as Claire would call it. Their talks were mostly playful or consisting of their children. They didn’t actually know much about one another on a personal level, they never had conversations like that and Harry wasn’t sure if this was pushing it or not.
So he left it at that. And a few days later, she reached out to him. Claire texted him, saying a guy asked her out on a date on Friday, asking him if it was okay if Atlas stayed the evening and if Harry had the time.
He responded faster than ever, immediately agreeing. Even though the idea that she was going on a date gnawed at him and he was searching high and low for the courage to ask her out himself – it still made his chest flutter that he was going to see her and talk to her.
The gnawing feel overpowered though, especially when he opened his door and she was there in a silk mini dress with tights and a dark purple loose cardigan over her shoulders to keep her warm. The cold was biting and even to drop Atlas off, Harry shortly invited her in.
Only when she was in the lights of the kitchen, could he take a decent look at her.
“Holy shit, what the hell happened to your face?” Was the first thing flying out of his mouth. Luckily for Harry, both Finn and Atlas were out of earshot. Claire exhaled and tilted her head to the side, “Is it really that obvious? I thought I covered it.”
She looked at him with big, round eyes. Her blonde hair was in soft waves laying over her back and all he could really see was the bruise on her cheekbone. He could tell it had faded and had gone towards a muted purple colour with hints of green. He could also see the layer of make-up she had put on over that.
“It’s… I mean, I can tell, yeah. It looks like a shadow.” He explained. Claire sighed, “Great. That guy’s gonna think I’m some crazy woman.”
“What happened?” Harry asked again. Claire took a moment and forced him a smile as she tried to busy herself with the strap of her bag, “Just me being clumsy.”
Harry narrowed his eyes, “I don’t believe that for a second. Why did you have Belle pick up Atlas every single day this week?”
“Because I was working and couldn’t do it.”
He crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged, “So? You could’ve asked me. Been doing it for the past few months with pleasure, so why relay on Belle again?”
“She asked, said she could use the money.” Claire shrugged and Harry huffed, “That doesn’t sound like you. Seems unlikely.”
“Yeah, I’m just that much of a bitch, aren’t I?” She responded bitterly, shaking her head to herself, “I don’t know what the big deal is. You got a week free of me and Atlas.”
“Didn’t ask for a week free of either you or Atlas. Neither did Finn.” It sounded like a dig, and Claire flicked her eyes up in shock of his words. They sounded venomous and angry, as if Finn had been unhappy this week without Atlas here in the evenings, and it was Claire’s fault. Harry continued, “Besides, I think the real reason wasn’t you being a nice person to Belle. I think the real reason was that you didn’t want me or Finn to see you with your face beaten up, which is why you hid all week.”
His voice softened and Claire’s stare hardened too. She inhaled a shaky breath, trying to recompose herself even if her heart was hammering violently and she could feel the lump in her throat.
“I’m going to give you a piece of advice, Harry.” She murmured, “If a person shows up with bruises and you have a feeling they’re not telling you the truth, there’s a reason for that. Don’t fucking pry it out of me like that, and why on earth do you even think you have the right or the audacity to do so? I don’t owe you any sort of explanation.”
He opened his mouth but she cut him off, “No, I don’t want to fucking hear it. You don’t get a free pass into my personal life just because my son likes you and we’re acquainted.”
It had gone from friends to acquaintances now. Harry felt the jab to his chest, knowing he had fucked up tremendously. Claire was breathing heavily as she sniffled once, “Now, I’m going to go on a date and attempt to enjoy it. I’ll see you later.” She strode past him and didn’t wait for Harry to let her out. The door slammed harshly until the pictures of Astrid and Finn on the walls rattled and Harry was left in silence.
He sat brooding that night. Checking his phone constantly for updates. Claire’s dates had never been this quiet. Usually she at least texted him when she arrived to let him know what the guy was wearing. There’d be texts throughout if her date said something disgusting or stupid, and at the end of the night to update him on if they had split the check or not.
It had been hours and there hadn’t been anything. With each buzz, he hastily grabbed his phone only to find it was either his mum or some notification of an e-mail he didn’t care for. His leg bobbed impatiently as he sat through another movie night with Finn and Atlas. And there was nothing that could take his mind off of things.
So when he had put the boys to bed and sat down on the couch again to check his phone, it was still empty. He drew up a message to send her but deleted it again, realizing his apologies would never come across through text while she was out with another man. He had to tell her in person, so he forced himself to stay awake.
Claire never came.
She never texted him, she simply never showed up. Harry stayed up for a few hours until midnight passed and then one in the morning, and then two in the morning. His lids felt droopy before he dragged himself to bed with the harsh realization that Claire was spending the night with her date.
He knew. She’d never go home to sleep by herself and leave Atlas here. She always picked him up. The only reason she wouldn’t pick him up, is if she was sleeping with him at his house or in a hotel room.
She was getting fucked, having sex, and Harry knew it.
The dates in the past hadn’t bothered him that much because they always ended up being assholes or losers and Claire was never truly interested in any of them. She never minded that there wasn’t a second date and simply kept swiping on Tinder until finding someone else.
In all the months they had been doing this, she had never spent the night with someone. It made Harry’s chest sink so deep that it hurt. It physically hurt, knowing she was with someone else. Who got to kiss her, touch her, smell her and taste her. Hear her, feel her, be inside of her.
His fists balled as he suddenly couldn’t catch sleep after that realization. He was so fucking jealous.
Harry hardly slept, but when his phone buzzed at around eight in the morning, he was wide awake.
Message from: Claire.
I’ll be there in like ten minutes.
He jolted up in bed and hastily went into the bathroom to freshen up and brush his teeth. Both boys were still asleep but Harry didn’t know for how long. He rushed down the stairs to be there for when she arrived, and like clockwork he heard gentle taps against the door.
He saw her and it only confirmed his suspicions. Her face was free of make-up and her hair was in a bun, but she was wearing the same clothes as the night before. The bruise was more prominent now with the absence of make-up, but what he could see was a fresh bruise. In the form of a lovebite at the base of her neck. It wasn’t that deep or dark, but he noticed straightaway.
Harry cleared his throat, “Hi.”
“Hey.” Claire mumbled, “Is Atlas up yet?”
“He’s not. D’you want to come in? I’ll make some coffee.”
Claire hesitated and eventually followed him inside of the familiar house. She sat down on the barstool she had been sitting in that first time she spent the day here and Harry had his back to her, working his coffee machine.
He swallowed through the lump in his throat, “So I take it you had a good date?”
“You could say that.” Claire breathed. Harry pressed his lips together, keeping his back to her. Claire cleared her throat, “We’re actually going out again next week.”
He turned around in lightning speed, “What?”
Claire blinked, “We’re going out again next week.” She repeated in a soft voice. Harry felt his fingers tightly gripping the countertop, “Like… like a second date?”
“Mhm.”
His knees weakened and he felt the stinging behind his lids, quickly turning around again to face the coffee machine, “That’s great.”
“It is.” Claire agreed, “He’s nice.”
They fell into silence and Harry poured her a cup of coffee as Claire drew a breath, “I can ask Belle, you know? To watch him. Next week.”
Harry immediately shook his head, “No way. Besides, it’s Christmas break. I’m sure Belle will want to do something else than babysit. And I don’t mind. We’re going to set up the tree, I’m sure Atlas will like that.”
“He will.” Claire nodded, “He’s been wanting a tree for a long time. We don’t have room in the apartment.”
Harry flicked his eyes to her, “Right.”
She forced him a smile and they fell into silence again. Harry realized he had never heard silence quite this fucking loud.
***
The week moved agonizingly slow. Claire showed up at school again, her bruise now faded. She picked up Atlas and shot a brief smile to Harry and Finn before spending the evening with her little man.
They cuddled and played board games, even some video games. It was always a task to entertain Atlas during school breaks. Claire couldn’t stay away from work so she usually organized camps for him or he spent a little more time with his father.
Not this time. Claire refused. She didn’t mind finding sitters and paying for them as long as Atlas didn’t spend any more time with Evan than absolutely necessary.
The had realized, after last weekend. After Atlas witnessed the abuse Evan put her through, that she would do everything in her power to keep him away. She wanted to give Evan a chance to be a father to Atlas, but he let him down over and over again. And mostly, Claire didn’t want Atlas to look up to Evan. And inherit some of his less nice qualities, like hitting women.
She couldn’t even imagine – and the thought made her sick – that Atlas would grow up to be like his father. It had resulted in more calls with her lawyer because she was getting slightly desperate for the money Evan owed her.
What had been taking her mind off things, was the prospect of her second date with Alexander. He had been an absolute sweetheart during their first date, so much so that Claire had felt butterflies. She opened up about Atlas and life as a single mum, and he was one of the first who didn’t laugh at her when she said she worked at Burger King. He noticed the bruise but didn’t ask her about it, besides wondering if she was in any pain.
She was, after a moment, from smiling so wide. So he gently kissed her at the end of the night and things got heated. Claire didn’t hesitate when he asked her to come to his apartment and they had spent a night between the sheets. Alexander had some stuff to learn, but Claire could be patient and guide him so he could learn how to satisfy her. She had searched high and low for an orgasm all night while giving him two, but it still didn’t mean it wasn’t fun.
Harry’s eyes had felt heavy on her when she went to drop Atlas off. Claire knew she looked good. She wore black again, a form-fitting dress to show off her curves with high heels to elevate her. She wore a bit of make-up but nothing too crazy and her hair was pinned back with a little butterfly clip.
His eyes had dragged up and down her form, boosting Claire’s confidence tremendously. She could see the heaviness in his eyes as they made a bit of polite small talk. She knew he was sorry about the way he spoke to her the week prior and she knew he didn’t like the fact she was going on a second date with Alexander.
She saw it in his stance, in his eyes. Jealousy. It was fine, Claire felt. Her and Harry did spent a lot of time together and even she’d feel a slight jab to her chest if he’d suddenly announce he was dating someone. In some stupid, crazy way it almost felt like they both had a claim on one another. But neither said anything and Claire wasn’t patient. Maybe she was taunting him, and part of her was. The dates in the past few months had all been disappointing and she expected the date with Alexander to be the same.
But he pleasantly surprised her and Claire had fun and felt seen. After the way Harry had spoken to her, it’s what she needed. And she couldn’t sit and wait around for him to figure out his feelings. She was moving on.
Moving on wasn’t easy though when your date doesn’t show up.
Claire looked like an idiot, sitting alone at the table in the restaurant. She checked her watch again, noticing Alexander was forty minutes late. She had double-checked their reservation to make sure she got the time and date right. She had texted him, called him, without answer. Her texts didn’t even go through, making her think he had her blocked.
She sipped slowly on her red wine until she had been there an hour, and she decided enough was enough. It was nine in the evening when she asked for the check to pay for her wine. The waiter shot her a sympathetic look that Claire brushed off, and she exited the restaurant.
Driving back to Harry’s house, she hadn’t notified him. She had only dropped Atlas off about an hour and a half ago and she suspected the three of them to just be sitting on the couch, watching a movie.
Claire shivered in the evening air as the had rang the door, hearing the familiar footsteps of Harry rushing over to the door before opening up with a frown. It softened at the sight of her. He hadn’t expected Claire here, an hour after she had left. The exciting glint she had in her eyes when leaving, was replaced by something he couldn’t really place.
“What happened?” He asked and Claire shrugged, fighting the embarrassed flush in her cheeks, “He stood me up.” She mumbled under her breath, “Can you grab Atlas? I really want to go home.”
“He stood you up?” Harry frowned, “What the fuck?”
Claire rolled her eyes, “Harry, it’s nothing. I’d just like to leave.”
“We’re in the middle of Monopoly.” He exhaled, “Look, just come in for a bit, you must be freezing.”
Claire hesitated. All she really wanted to do was go home with Atlas and cry in her shower before cuddling him to sleep. Harry opened the door wider, ushering her in, “Come on.”
And so she did. Her feet carried her into the house, met with the familiar warmth that Harry’s house exuded.
“Mummy!” Atlas sounded exited at the sight of his mother, jumping out of his chair to hug her. Claire smiled and kissed his forehead, “Hi, bub. ‘M back soon, aren’t I?”
Atlas giggled and jumped around, clearly very pleased with Claire joining the Monopoly-party.
“D’you want some tea? Or wine?” Harry offered.
“Wine.” Claire breathed immediately and Harry nodded, taking two glasses and filling them with some red wine as Finn and Atlas filled Claire in on how the game was going so far. She didn’t seem too in it with her head but nodded either way, quickly catching up on Harry’s strategy on losing on purpose to let either of the other boys win.
Claire followed along, playing without thinking and losing on purpose. Her wine was finished by the time Finn was crowned as the Monopoly-king.
As Finn and Atlas quickly settled down in front of the television, Claire and Harry were left to clear out the board game from the dinner table they had played at. Claire had put her hair up again with one of Harry’s pencils as they both tucked Monopoly back into the box.
“Some more wine?” Harry suggested. Claire exhaled and shook her head, “No, thanks, I still have to drive.”
“You’re not going home, are you?” Harry frowned, leaning against one of the chairs, “Claire, just stay here. You can sleep in the bed with Atlas. Or there’s even another guest room if you want.”
And Claire was too tired to argue. She timidly gave in and lifted her glass, “Well in that case… refill please.”
About an hour later, they had tucked their boys into bed. It was past their bedtime already but Harry and Claire agreed to cut them so slack since it was winter break and they didn’t have school for a few weeks.
“Do you want a shower? Or just some clothes of mine?”
“Just some clothes, please.” Claire responded, “’M a little cold.”
And so Harry gave her sweats, a shirt, a jumper and a pair of socks she could fit her feet in about three times. It looked a little ridiculous, but Harry had hearts in his eyes when she joined him on the sectional couch. She looked cuddly and soft, and her eyes were a little heavy from being tired and sad.
“Are you tired or do you want to watch a movie or something?” Harry asked as he popped his feet up on the coffee table. Claire was on the other side of the couch with a blanket around her, “Your couch is so comfortable, I’m probably going to fall asleep here.” She contently sighed, “Don’t even need a bed.”
Harry chuckled as he watched her nuzzle into the pillow. With her feet stretched his way, he gently tapped her shin, “How come you’re so tired?”
“’S just been a long week.” She sighed, “Arranging things with my boss for the winter break, so I can hire sitters throughout the day but can stay with Atlas at night.” She explained, “Don’t want him to spend his break with his father.”
Harry took a sip of his wine and softly exhaled, “Can I ask why not?”
Claire flicked her eyes up, appreciating the way Harry was more careful in asking her this time instead of how he approached the subject last time. She swallowed, “Well, he’s abusive.” She softly spoke, avoiding his eyes, “I don’t want Atlas around someone like him.”
“Would he hurt Atlas?” Harry frowned and Claire shrugged, “I don’t think so. But then again, I also didn’t think he’d ever hurt me.”
“He hit you, didn’t he? Two weeks ago?” Harry softly asked and Claire let out a breath, “Mhm.”
“Shit, Claire…” He cursed, shaking his head, “I’m so sorry.”
“’S not your fault.”
“No, I’m sorry for prying. I-I had a hunch and I should’ve just left it at that, it wasn’t fair of me.” Harry apologized, staring at his fingers before he lifted his head and turned to face her. Claire had a sad look on her face, “Just another thing added to the plate this week. His lawyer is literally such a dick. I just… I want this all to be over. To cut ties, to never have to see him again. But I also want Atlas to know his father.” She shrugged, “It’s hard.”
“I can imagine.” Harry sympathized, stroking his fingers over her covered shin. He licked his lip before continuing, “Were you two together for a long time?”
Claire sat up and hugged her legs to her body, her chin on her knee, “Few years. I made some wrong friends in school and went through a phase. I used drugs sometimes, I drank a lot, I partied, dropped out of school… I met Evan during that time and was already on thin ice with my parents. I sort of moved in with him in this little studio. He was – uh… a dealer. And he used a lot. Sort of pulled me into that.” She softly explained.
Claire closed her eyes for a moment, “I even used when pregnant. I didn’t know I was pregnant for the longest time and just kept drinking and doing drugs, I-I had no idea.” She murmured and Harry’s heart cracked, watching her as she blinked away some tears, “It’s literally a miracle that Atlas was born and that he was completely fine.”
It was silent for a bit as Claire relived some memories in her brain. Harry turned to face her more, scooting a little closer on the couch, “Was he happy that you were pregnant?”
“Ecstatic, actually.” Claire mumbled, “He was so happy. Of course, he was high most of the time. When sober, he hardly acknowledged me. He was… very difficult to read. When he was high, he was super happy or the complete opposite. When he was sober, he barely showed any emotion at all.”
Claire took a breath, “The moment my parents knew I was pregnant, they cut me off completely. I haven’t been in contact with them ever since. So I moved in with Evan permanently. Neither of us had a job and he got money from dealing, but it was a dangerous life. He got threatened a lot and was always stressed, he worked that out on me. He hit me, always when he was high. I forgave him, I had nowhere to go.” She shrugged, shaking her head to herself, “It was difficult for a few years. When Atlas was around two, I finally got away. I’ve been on my own ever since.”
The television was softly playing in the background but neither Harry or Claire paid it any attention. She lifted her head to send him a weak smile, “I’m happy now. Atlas is amazing and I love him so much. It’s just… hard sometimes. I don’t want to have to deal with him anymore, it just brings back so many memories and he keeps thinking he’s got some claim over me.” She nibbled her lip, “Atlas goes to his place sometimes on a Saturday. Like… once a month or something. He never stays the night. Two weeks ago he went there and obviously shared stuff about his life. About Finn, about… you.”
“Shit.” Harry murmured and Claire hummed, “Yeah. Evan lost it. I went to pick up Atlas again and he freaked out, said I was… well, every name in the book, really. Doesn’t usually bother me, but Atlas was around a-and I fought back, told him to stop. He just – well, yeah.” She pointed to the faded bruise on her face and sniffed once, “And that’s that.”
“Atlas saw?” Harry whispered and Claire nodded, “Yep.”
“Holy fuck… that guy is insane.” He scooted a little closer again, “Claire, you need like a restraining order. And you need full custody.”
“I’m trying.” She sighed, “I swear, these things take so long. I’ve been trying for months now, years maybe. It’s really not easy.”
Harry exhaled, “No, I know. I know.”
“Do you…” Claire asked warily, “do you have full custody?”
“Mhm.” Harry shortly nodded, “Astrid voluntarily wrote away her rights. She wanted nothing to do with Finn or me, so it was an easy arrangement. It’s more difficult when both parties fight the other.”
Claire frowned, “She… She chose to not be a part of Finn’s life?”
He shortly cleared his throat, “Yeah. Astrid… she’s a complex person, Claire. ‘M not even really sure how to explain it.”
“You don’t have to if you don’t want.” She softly spoke and Harry shook his head, “I think we’re sharing traumas here and it’s only fair if I share mine.” He tried to make it sound like a joke, but there was heaviness in the air. Harry licked his lip, “We met when we were young and got married. Always wanted a family. It didn’t work for some time until Astrid got pregnant with Finn. From the moment she was pregnant I just… saw her change. It’s like she felt suffocated all of a sudden and only then realized how much her life was going to change as a mum. She did all these things, took all these trips spontaneously, like she was scared to be an adult all of a sudden. I sort of let her do her thing, figuring it was just what she needed at that point.”
Claire listened as Harry continued, “When he was born, it got even worse. It was like she resented him. We talked to therapists who brought up the whole postpartum depression thing, but Astrid said it was more than that. She didn’t want anything to do with Finn and actually tried to be as far away from him. Her motherly instincts never kicked in. She took off with her friends, took trips, partied and whatnot, always leaving me here with him. It was like she regressed back to her life in her early twenties. We hardly saw one another, she missed a lot of his first few years. She just didn’t want him. And then one day she just announced that she was leaving. Moving to some island to start over, signing away her rights and… she was gone. We got divorced easily and I’ve been a single parent ever since.”
“Wow.” Claire breathed, “That’s… so crazy. When was the last time you saw her?”
Harry scratched above his brow, “Probably… four years ago? I have no idea where she is right now, or what she’s doing. She’s completely messed it up for me, I don’t want anything to do with her ever again.” He sounded bitter and Claire shortly nodded, “Understandable.”
“It’s just like a sense of responsibility. I don’t know…” Harry mumbled, “We actively tried to have a baby, it’s not like it was a surprise.”
They fell into a silence until Harry exhaled and held up his glass, “Cheers to our exes.”
“Cheers.” Claire chuckled before shaking her head, “How sad are we.”
Harry took a sip, “We’re not sad.” He argued with a soft smile and Claire puffed out a breath, “I am. Can’t believe I got stood up. That was super embarrassing.”
“It’s honestly insane. He’s a fucking asshole.”
Claire pressed her lips together, “I mean, if he just wanted sex, he could’ve said so. I’m not stupid, like I get it. Just fucking tell me the truth and don’t string me along.”
Harry shot her a sly smile, “At least you got an orgasm out of it.”
“He did.” Claire corrected him in a shrug, her voice nothing but a gentle mumble. Harry looked at Claire over the rim of his glass, “Hm?” He wasn’t sure if he had heard her correctly.
She nibbled her lip, avoiding his eyes as she let out a soft breath, “Well – he did. I didn’t – uh… he didn’t get me off.”
“You’re kidding me, right?” Harry sounded in complete disbelief before throwing his head back with a laugh.
Claire blushed red in embarrassment and rolled her eyes, “Don’t make fun of me.”
“I’m not!” Harry laughed, shaking his head, “Holy shit, I can’t believe this guy?! He didn’t even get you off and then has the nerve to ghost you?!”
She took another sip, “Well, yeah.”
“He’s literally such a dick, what the hell…” Harry mumbled, “So was he just like… bad or anything?”
Claire’s red cheeks didn’t disappear as Harry continued the subject and she let out a shuddery breath, “I mean, not really. Although actually, yes. He tried, I think.” The more Claire thought about it, the more she hesitated. Sighing out, she forced Harry a small smile, “It doesn’t matter.”
“It does, though. Who the fuck does he think he is.”
Harry’s anger was sort of infectious and she felt the fire in her chest, “You know what? Yes. You’re right. It does matter. Because I pulled out all my tricks, you know? Even gave him head! He came twice!” She rambled and Harry’s eyes widened. Claire let out a sigh, “I just want – you know?” She used hand gestures now and Harry watched intently, “What?” He asked in confusion.
Claire put her glass of wine down on the coffee table with a slight slam, “I just want a fucking guy to just… grab me! Like – “ She pressed her lips together, “just someone to throw me around, have his fucking way with me, shut me up. Make it rough, you know?”
It was Harry’s turn to get red cheeks as he listened to Claire explaining her sexual desires. She seemed lost in her head, sighing again with tense shoulders, “And just claim me?! I don’t know, just like fucking take me and kiss me a-“
Claire couldn’t finish her sentence before feeling Harry’s lips on hers. He had lunged forward at her, near knocking her backwards as his mouth was on hers. Claire yelped in surprise at the short kiss. Harry was panting as he pulled back, only an inch or two. His wine-stained lips brushed hers.
“W-What are you doing?” Claire murmured.
“God, just shut up.” Harry groaned, watching Claire’s wide eyes as he grabbed her waist and yanked her body on top of his. Claire near flew through the air, gasping in surprise as she found herself perched up on Harry’s lap with her thighs on each side of his. Her chest heaved in shallow breaths, hands bracing herself on his shoulders as she stared down at him.
His eyes were dark and deep, lust dripping from him as he sinfully slipped his hands up her covered thighs. They stared at each other for just a moment before Harry grabbed the back of her head to pull her down and reconnect their lips.
A moan from Claire got muffled against his lips. Her fingers dug into his shoulders before moving into his hair, cupping his jaw and sliding into his neck. She touched wherever she could reach, feeling his strong arms wrapped around her form to keep her tightly pressed into his chest. A tug on her hips made her scoot up on his lip, her mouth parting at the bulge in his sweatpants.
“Fuck.” Claire moaned, pushing her tongue into Harry’s mouth. Claire reciprocating was something Harry could’ve only dreamed of. Everything she had been describing was exactly what he had been wanting to do for weeks now, but felt too unsure to do so. He didn’t want to scare her off, yet now he felt fucking unhinged.
The moment his fingers tugged at the jumper covering Claire’s body, she caught on. Her blonde hair flew around as they broke apart and she tugged it off, leaving her in one of his shirts.
“Fucking finally.” Claire moaned as Harry pulled her hips down on his and her head rolled back on her shoulders, “Please – oh god…” She was bucking back into him, hips sensually rocking in wave-like motions to stimulate him. Harry felt the heat radiating from her core, his head dropping back on the couch, “Jesus.” He hissed in bliss.
He lifted his head again, brushing his lips over her pulse-point, “Should we go to the bedroom?”
“Uh-huh.” Claire panted, “Please, I need you.”
A surge of confidence shot through Harry, “Yeah?”
Claire wrapped her fingers in his hair, “Yes.” She whispered, “So bad.”
Harry’s lips nipped on her neck, “Do you need me or do you just need to get fucked?”
“You.” Claire spoke without missing a beat, “Been wanting this for so long.”
Harry pulled back with surprise written all over his face, “What? Really?”
“Yes.” She chuckled. Harry frowned, “Why didn’t you say anything? I-I’ve liked you for months.”
“I know.”
His cheeks turned pink again and Claire smiled in amusement, brushing her thumb over his bottom lip. Harry swallowed thickly, “Y-You know? And you never said or did anything? Kept going on dates with other guys?”
“Well, I could’ve been wrong.” Claire shrugged, “Didn’t want to make a fool of myself and ruin our arrangement or ruin anything for Atlas.”
Harry was about to say something but Claire beat him to it, biting her lip and brushing her hair over her shoulder. Harry’s eyes dropped to the faded lovebite on her neck and his throat tightened as Claire batted her lashes, “Besides, it was funny to see you a little jealous.”
“Played me, hm?” Harry growled, tangling a hand in her hair and Claire gasped at the tight hold he had on her scalp, pulling her to the side a little as his mouth latched onto the still existing hickey. Claire’s eyes rolled back, her hips bucking on their own accord as he deepened the bruise, claiming her. She was ruining her underwear, a sob stuck in her throat from how desperate she was and how badly she needed him.
“Still funny?” Harry licked over the fresh bruise, throbbing and angry purple to disturb Claire’s skin. His fingers dug into her hip, “Answer me.”
“F-Fuck, no.” Claire panted, “God, Harry, please.”
He pulled her hips again, dragging her up his growing cock as he exhaled a shaky sigh. Claire blinked her eyes open, somehow sensing his hesitance, “Are you okay?” She questioned softly, cupping his cheeks. Her nose bumped his and Harry puckered his lips for her to give him a gentle kiss.
“Yeah.” He rasped, “I might – uh… be a little rusty. ‘S been a while.”
Claire nodded, “Okay.”
Harry chewed the inside of his cheek, “No, it’s like been… years.” He mumbled the last part, too embarrassed to actually say out loud. Claire froze on top of him, staring at his eyes which refused to look back at her, “Wait, are you serious? You haven’t had sex in years?”
“Yep.” He exhaled, “It’s, uh… well, I’ve been with women after Astrid, just not many. Had a few one night stands and it just… well, didn’t really do it for me. And I just stopped then, focussing completely on raising Finn and then it didn’t happen anymore.”
Claire was quiet for a moment, taking in the information before she nodded, “Okay, that makes sense. But you… masturbate?”
“Mhm.”
“And… do you want this?” She checked. Harry huffed out a chuckle, “Fuck, yes. Wanted this for weeks.”
“Weeks?”
He flicked his eyes up, “Months, actually.”
Claire kissed him, “Take me to bed, Harry.”
He didn’t hesitate, grabbing Claire underneath her thighs to pick her up. She was astounded at his strength. She had seen Harry shirtless by the pool and had seen him in shirts all the time with exposed arms. She had never witnessed him working out or anything, but he was strong enough to not blink while carrying her up the stairs.
“We’re gonna have to be quiet.” He murmured into her neck, “Don’t want to wake our boys.”
“Definitely not.” Claire agreed.
Harry’s foot kicked open the door of his bedroom, “What I meant is you’re going to have to be quiet.” He quipped with a sly smirk as he dropped Claire on the mattress. She watched him, standing at the foot of the bed to rip off his shirt and leave him topless. Claire’s thigh quivered at the sight of his muscular body and the many tattoos. His abs flexed as he moved and she was mesmerized.
Harry felt another boost of confidence at the hungry look in Claire’s eyes. She laid on her beck and he took her ankle, sliding off the huge sock he had given her before moving over to the other foot, “How do you want it?”
Claire wanted to moan. She tipped her head back with closed eyes, biting her lip, “Hard.” She whimpered, “Deep.”
Harry chuckled, “A little greedy, hm?”
After taking off her socks, he tugged at the leg holes of her sweatpants. Due to the size of the clothes, they easily slipped off of Claire’s hips and thighs, easy for Harry to take off. Every inch of her legs became visible to him, as did the red thong she was wearing. His mouth watered, chucking the sweatpants over his shoulders before climbing on top of her.
Claire parted her legs immediately, arms reaching out to pull him into her. She hungrily kissed him, tangling a hand back in his hair as her legs curled around his thighs to keep him close, close enough to feel him between her thighs. With the disappearance of her sweatpants, she felt him much more clear, rubbing against her pussy.
Harry was hard as a rock, so turned on by her and this moment and the way he had imagined this. He had never been the most spontaneous person – something Astrid loved to complain about – so it took him a lot of courage to just grab Claire and hope for the best. He didn’t want to scare her off or cross any boundaries, and somehow they didn’t really know each other on a level that he knew if this was all okay or not.
But the way she whimpered in his mouth and desperately pulled at him, was enough proof that she needed him badly. And according to her, it was him she needed. No one else.
Claire got impatient, reaching for his hand to bring it between them. She left it at that, handing the reigns over to Harry. His cheeks turned slightly pink and with their lips still brushing together in kisses, Harry nervously skimmed his fingers over the hem of Claire’s panties.
She shuddered, holding her breath, “God – Harry, get on with it.” She pleaded. His eyes closed with a guttural moan, slipping his fingers inside her underwear to stroke between her folds with the rough pads of them. Claire immediately squeaked and jumped in sensitivity of the touch and Harry latched his lips onto her neck again to silence himself.
His fingers moved up and down to feel her, underwear tenting around his hand as he felt her so wet and warm for him, it could make him cry. Slick, dripping pussy as Claire opened her legs wider to allow him more room. It spread her for him, letting his fingers graze over every ridge and bump she had until he settled the pads of his fingers on her clit.
She gasped desperately, her legs so tense and her entire body so worked up. She wasn’t sure if she was hurting him with the firm grip on his hair, but she needed something to ground herself. Arching her back up, she whined, “F-Fuck me. Please.”
Harry groaned again, a sound that went straight between Claire’s legs as he kept touching her clit. He rubbed circles to arouse her more, to get her all wet and open. Harry knew he was rather well-endowed and even though Claire had sex on a much more regular basis than him, it would be presumptuous to assume the guy who couldn’t get her off last week was anywhere near his size.
“Need to get you ready.” Harry mumbled into her neck, lifting his head and finding the strength to look in her eyes. It hit him like a sledgehammer, the look she sent him. Horny, desperate, near crying for him. Her eyes glazed over, her lips in an inviting, swollen pout and her cheeks flushed.
“I am.” Claire breathed out, “So ready. P-Please.”
Harry bit his lip, “’M not teasing you here, Claire. You’ll thank me for it.” At that, he grabbed one of her hands to guide it to his crotch, inviting her to touch him. Claire did so without hesitation, panting out as she fought with the elastic band of his boxers before finally getting her hand in. She paused immediately, eyes flicking up and widening dramatically, “Wow.”
“Yeah.” Harry smirked arrogantly, “Still think you’re ready?”
Her hand felt small around the girth of his erection, stroking curiously from thick base to swollen tip. If there was anything Harry knew, it was that he was fucking ready for her.
Claire let out a shuddery exhale as her head thudded back into the mattress, “Yes, please – I can’t wait. I need you.” She panted, restlessly writhing on the mattress, “I need you inside of me, I need it to hurt. I can take it.”
“Holy shit.” Harry cursed, bucking his hips into her hand. He stared at her, losing his sense of hesitation as he licked his lip, “You have to tell me if I need to stop, okay?”
“Uh-huh. Promise.”
“Good girl.” He whispered, removing his hand from in between her legs. He quickly brought the tips of his fingers to his mouth to get them clean, his tongue swirling around casually before leaning down and pressing a quick kiss to her lips. Claire was fucking dumbfounded.
Harry jumped off the bed, rummaging one of his drawers as she pushed herself up on her elbows, “Are you going to tie me up?” She sounded almost hopeful and Harry chuckled, shaking his head, “No, I like having your hands in my hair. ‘M looking for a condom.”
“Right.” Claire took it upon herself to slip out of the shirt she was wearing and then remove her underwear to leave her completely naked. She laid on Harry’s dark blue sheets, staring up at the beamed ceiling of his house as Harry grumbled under his breath, closing the drawer to open another, “Found it!” He cheered.
He turned around in triumph but his smile quickly dropped as he laid eyes on a naked Claire. His throat ran dry, seeing the length of her torso, the dips of her ribs and her chest. Full, firm tits and hardened nipples sitting up and waiting to be taken into his mouth. The stretchmarks on her thighs, the lines of her underwear denting her skin and some faded tan lines gracing her.
“So fucking beautiful.” Harry sighed, slowly walking over to her. The pace had slowed a little bit and was less frantic now as he stood at the edge of the bed, letting his eyes drag over her. Where Claire assumed she’d feel shy, she actually felt confident. Harry’s eyes studied her and he looked mesmerized. He wasn’t judging any part of her, he just wanted to see her.
Harry exhaled shakily and shook his head to himself, “Should’ve done this way sooner.”
“I would’ve let you.” Claire teased. Harry smirked slightly as he took it upon himself to open up the square foil of the condom. He dropped his boxers, Claire’s eyes widening and her mouth watering at the sight of his hard cock bobbing up and standing up tall.
“Oh my god.” She whimpered when he shortly stroked himself before fiddling with the condom. “Wait!” Claire squeaked. Harry paused and his brows raised, “What is it?”
Claire swallowed, her eyes glued to his erection, “I want to suck you off.”
“Fuck, no.” Harry breathed, shaking his head sternly as he rolled the condom down his shaft, “If you take me in your mouth, I’m gonna cum immediately.”
Claire wanted to protest but Harry was already hovering over her, knees kicking her legs apart to allow him room. Goosebumps rose over her body at his closeness, his nose continuously brushing into hers as he had one hand around his base to guide towards her.
“Still okay?” He whispered and Claire let out a soft moan, “Yes, yes.”
“Still think your little pussy can take me?”
Her eyes shot open as a tingle of arousal ran down her spine. She bucked up while biting down her lip, somehow not expecting Harry to say anything like that. Claire fought for air, “Yes.” She rasped again, “Please.”
The second she felt Harry’s blunt tip against her opening, Claire focussed on relaxing. She attempted to spread her legs wider for him, focussing on not tensing up any of her muscles as he held the eye contact. Both their mouths opened in a breathless whine as he pushed in. He felt her walls rippling around him, fighting the intrusion for a moment. Hesitation flashed over Claire’s face for a brief second until she breathed through it, her eyes rolling back as her head lolled to the side from the stretch.
“Fuck, you’re so wet and tight.” Harry lowly commented, taking his sweet time in inching forward to fill her up. Claire was panting, her nails digging into his back as she felt the burn between her thighs. He was everywhere, and he wasn’t even fully in yet. Harry paused for a few seconds before rocking in again to get deeper. Claire bit her lip with a high moan escaping her lips.
“Quiet.” Harry whispered, kissing her shortly. She nodded frantically, “I-I know, fuck – you’re so big.”
“You can take it.”
Claire arched, Harry holding onto her waist before sliding his hand up to play with her nipple. He cupped her breast, giving a squeeze before using his thumb to tease her. He used his other hand to grip the bedding, holding himself up on his elbow.
“Fuck.” He whimpered when he finally bottomed out. Harry relaxed slightly, feeling his hips flush to Claire’s thighs. His cock twitched inside of her, a tight fit between her snug, wet walls. She was panting underneath him, the sight so erotic. He couldn’t help himself when he let go of her breast and grabbed her throat instead, giving a light squeeze while kissing her.
He swallowed down her moans as he started moving, rearing back about halfway before rocking in again. He kept the pace slow and gentle for now to let her adjust, and their tongues roamed each other’s mouths in the meantime. Harry was sure to have marks down his back from her nails as Claire clawed at him.
“Okay?” Harry checked breathlessly as he brushed his lips over hers. “Yes.” Claire confirmed, “You can go harder.”
Harry sighed, “Thank god.” And then he picked up his pace and the strength of his thrusts. The breath got knocked out of Claire’s lungs with each drop of his hips on hers, nudging up a spot so deep inside it felt near unbearable yet she still wanted more.
Harry shifted his hips, scooting closer as his lips were on her neck and he buried his face in her throat. “God, you feel so good.” He moaned, “Such a fucking tight cunt for me.”
With the constant shifting in his position, it didn’t take Harry long to find her g-spot. Claire jolted up with a high whine the moment his tip brushed up her front wall, and her legs spasmed. He could feel her gushing slightly as her muscles clamped around him tightly.
“Oh my god!” Claire moaned, causing Harry to slap his hand right over her mouth, “Keep it down.” He hissed, holding his hand to muffle her moans. A tear escaped her eye as he kept pounding her into the mattress in a murderous pace, just like she had asked him to.
“Am I getting you close, baby?” He near taunted, sweat pearling at his hairline and a smirk gracing his pink lips at the sight of her wrecked state, “Already?” He added.
Claire managed to nod and he tutted her, “Good. Found your sweet spot, didn’t I? Right…” He brought his hips back before thrusting sharply, “there?”
Claire’s eyes rolled back as she shook uncontrollably, another wave of squirt wetting Harry, who moaned at the feeling and the sight, “Fuck yes, get wet on my cock, hm? Need you to cum for me, Claire. You fucking deserve it.” He put force behind his words and power into his hips, relentlessly fucking into her.
He kept his hand over her mouth to keep her quiet, and Claire sobbed as she was on the edge. Harry thought about it. Teasing her, torturing her. But her eyes were watery, her nails denting his skin and her pussy so good for him. He allowed her to cum. With two more deep thrusts, Claire convulsed. A scream ripped through her chest, muffled by Harry’s hand as he fucked her through the orgasm. Claire’s legs clenched around him as she arched and writhed.
“’S good, that’s good.” Harry praised, kissing away her tears, “Fuck, that’s so good. Y’feel so fucking amazing, cumming on my cock like that. Such a good girl.”
Claire whined against his hand, her fingers curling around his wrist to pull at his arm. Harry let go, letting Claire desperately inhale the breath her lungs so badly needed. She coughed slightly from the gagging, wheezing in air as her body trembled in the aftermath of her orgasm. Harry’s thrusts had turned into gentle grinding motions, smirking down at her, “Feel good?”
“Oh my god.” Claire whimpered, still shuddering, “S-So good. Holy shit. I’ve never had an orgasm like that.”
They both slowed down a little, Harry’s cock painfully twitching inside of her. Claire blinked her eyes open, “Can you still keep going?”
“Mhm.” Harry swallowed, “Little more. I think I could get you to cum again.”
She smiled, biting her lip, “That would be great.”
He kissed her, smiling against her lips. His heart fluttered as she ran a hand through his hair, massaging his scalp a little. Harry hummed against her lips, still inside of her, “I’m afraid I’m obsessed with you.”
“Same.” Claire breathed back without a thought, her eyes exuding warmth and comfort as she stared up at him. A slight clench of her pussy brought Harry back to his mission of the night. Getting her off again.
Without warning, he lifted up on his arms and slid back, slipping from her. Claire gasped at the loss of contact, watching dazedly as Harry leaned down between her legs and his hot mouth was on her. “Oh! Oh my god." Claire breathed, hips jolting up as he licked at her, tongue wiggling between her pussy lips and up to her clit to give a harsh suck. Claire bit her lip, “H-Harry…” She moaned.
He hummed back, sliding the flat of his tongue up her cunt before sitting up again. He licked around his lips, tasting her before tapping her thigh, “Are you gonna ride me?”
Claire was still catching her breath as she swallowed, “I don’t think my legs work.”
Harry chuckled, biting his lip, “Won’t have to do anything. Just get on top of me.” He urged her and Claire nodded, letting him help her as they switched positions. Much like on the couch, Claire straddled him. The wet of her pussy pressed into the base of his cock, grinding softly as they indulged in another making-out session.
Harry held her hair back and had one hand on her ass, cupping the flesh and squeezing, urging her to grind into him. When he felt like Claire was too scared to fully sit down on him, he slapped her ass and she gasped, no longer holding herself up.
“So beautiful.” Harry whispered, head popped up on a few pillows as Claire hovered over him. They shared little kisses as he urged her hips up to sink down on him. “God – fuck.” Claire whimpered as she took him, slowly sitting down on his cock and feeling him in a different angle.
“Good, good.” Harry praised, his eyes closing as her warm cunt swallowed him, “So fucking good.” It sounded like a slur and both took a moment to adjust again.
“Hands behind your back.” Harry instructed in a strained voice, “Fuck, ‘m not gonna last long.”
Claire quickly obliged, depending on Harry’s arms to hold her a little upright. She was leaned completely over him, face hovering over his. Harry held one hand in the back of her neck with her hair in a makeshift ponytail, and held his other hand around her throat to keep her head tilted up.
With Claire’s arms behind her back, she was completely folded up for him and she loved it. She could feel her wetness seeping from her pussy, making a mess of Harry’s thighs. He didn’t seem to mind one bit, hardly paying it any attention before he started fucking up into her.
The position made Claire gasp, her body going lax for a moment before the pleasure consumed her and she let herself get used by Harry. He was so insanely deep like this, it was almost painful but in the best way. She’d be sore, for sure. She’d feel him for days, the way he stretched her and claimed her. God, it was everything she had craved.
“Holy shit – Claire,” Harry panted, “I need you to cum again.”
“Uh-huh.” She managed to choke out, “Please, it’s so good.” Her eyes watered again and Harry groaned softly, staring at her. They kissed again, his hand no longer on her throat but affectionately cupping her cheek as her tongue slipped into his mouth.
It was like he needed that moment before turning into a full animal. Holding both hands on the makeshift ponytail, he gave her a sharp tug to have her staring up at the ceiling. With Claire folded back in half and her hands still behind her back, Harry was relentless in the way his hips snapped up and his cock moved inside of her wet pussy.
“O-Oh god, Harry!” Claire squeaked, “I’m gonna cum. So hard, fuck.” Her words were jumbled and stuttering, her eyes tightly screwed shut as her second orgasm washed over her. She was quiet this time, unable to get out a sound or a word. Harry let go of her hair and Claire dropped her face in the crook of his neck, panting out desperately as she clenched and shuddered and convulsed around him.
Harry’s eyes rolled back at the feeling, “Shit, oh god.” He cursed, sliding both hands down to her ass to knead her and keep her firmly pressed to him. He grabbed the flesh, spreading her cheeks and rolling her back down onto him as he finished inside of the condom. He was sweaty and clammy, and Claire was sprawled out on top of him without the ability to move.
Both stayed like that for a moment. Claire shuddered every so often, her muscles tensing after two harsh orgasms as Harry was melted into the bed with her on top of him. They shared gentle caresses, his fingers dancing over her spine as she stroked her thumb over his jaw, “Wow.” Claire whispered after a few minutes.
Harry lazily smiled with his eyes closed, “Yeah. Wow. Shit, that was good.”
“Mhm.” She hummed and Harry sighed, “We should clean up a bit, hm? And go to sleep?”
Claire was yawning as she agreed, “Yes.”
Grabbing her hip, Harry gently nudged her off. Claire let him, no strength in her legs as she fell on the mattress next to him. Harry’s cock slipped out of her, softening up inside of the condom and he hissed in sensitivity as he got up and headed into the en-suite bathroom to clean up and dispose of the condom.
After washing his hands, he went to get Claire. He pulled her up, “C’mon, you need to pee.” He whispered. Claire fought to keep her eyes open, fully naked as Harry helped her into the bathroom and gave her the privacy to use the toilet.
Both brushed their teeth after that and collapsed in the bed. No words were spoken when Harry pulled Claire into his side for her head to rest on his chest and her arms to wrap around him. He cuddled her back, brushing his lips over her forehead, “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.” She whispered back, giving one more kiss to his neck before falling asleep.
Harry feared that it might be awkward in the morning, waking up with Claire after that. But it wasn’t. If anything, his heart soared as he was woken up with kisses to his chest, leading up to his neck and his jaw as her hand stroked over his side.
He shortly squeezed her body, eyes still closed, “Hey.” He rasped. Claire smiled into his neck, her leg hooked over his hips, “Hi, good morning.”
He kept his eyes closed as he lazily rolled around with her, changing the position until he was cuddled into her side with his face in her neck, “What time is it?”
“The sun’s coming up.” Claire responded in a whisper. Harry’s arms were around her and he inhaled her scent, puckering his lips, “Hmm.”
“Think we woke anyone last night?”
His lips curled into a soft smirk, remembering every second as he let out a breath, “Don’t think so, no. How are you feeling?”
“Good.” Claire whispered, shifting a little in his hold until she cupped his jaw. Harry’s eyes opened as he felt her kissing him, a few gentle pecks placed on his lips. He smiled involuntary, staring at Claire who looked giddy and sparkly in the morning.
“This is a nice way to wake up.” He whispered and she hummed, “It sure is.” They were in silence for a bit until Claire took a breath, “So what’s usually for breakfast on Saturdays?”
“Pancakes.” Harry yawned. He gently squeezed her waist, “Wanna help me?”
About ten minutes later, they were in the kitchen. Claire was dressed in her underwear and just a shirt of Harry’s, reaching well over her ass while they roamed around the kitchen to get everything for the pancakes and stealing kisses in between. Harry could hardly focus on the stupid pancakes, constantly having his hands on her and hiking up the shirt to get a peek of what was underneath.
“Harry.” Claire giggled, “The boys will be up soon.”
He stood behind her, pushing her into the countertop a little as his fingers toyed with the hem of the shirt. His lips were on her neck from behind, “We’ll hear.” He whispered, “Just a quickie.”
Claire didn’t say anything, and Harry felt her giving in as she relaxed. He smirked into her neck, “So good for me.” He murmured lowly, bunching the shirt up around her waist. He pulled back a little to stare at her ass, covered by the thin band of lace of the red thong. He bit his lip, grazing his thumb over the fabric, “Let me get a condom.” He whispered.
She whined in protest, grabbing his wrist to keep him right where he was, “No, fuck that. Just do me.” She sighed, “Fuck me bare. I wanna feel you.”
Harry groaned, not needing more convincing than that. He was quick, hooking her thong to the side and pushing his sweats down. He spat down into his hand to lube himself up, guiding between her ass cheeks to find her weeping pussy. Claire leaned over the countertop a bit more to make it easier, and Harry pushed in slowly again.
He watched, the way her fingers gripped around the edge of the countertop, the way her back tensed at the intrusion, the way her head dropped and the way her legs trembled as he entered her again.
“Are you sore?” He whispered, urging her to stand up straighter again so he could wrap his arms around her. They slipped underneath the shirt, palming her tits as Claire leaned her head back on his shoulder, “A bit, but it’s so okay.” She responded. Harry hummed, nipping on her neck as he started fucking her. He was sensitive, early in the morning. His cock was painfully hard and he sighed in bliss of being inside of her again.
The kitchen was silent apart from the steady ticking of the clock and the faint sound of a car driving by every once in a while. They breathed sharply and heavily, but both kept their moans down. The only other thing that could be heard was the sound of Harry’s hips slapping into her ass, fucking her from behind.
It didn’t feel like enough anymore, and after a few minutes he slipped out to turn her around. Grabbing her thighs, Harry easily lifted Claire up on the countertop, lips hovering over one another as he pushed in again. His cock shone in the slick of her arousal, easily sinking back into her pussy as she sat up at the perfect height.
He held one hand on her thigh, hiking it up over his hips as he fucked her quickly and sharp. “Fuck.” Harry choked out a whisper, tugging Claire to the edge to get deeper. She leaned back on one palm, watching him intently as Harry fucked her for his own pleasure. She didn’t mind. Claire was too sore and tired to reach an orgasm, but watching Harry as he neared his own end, was mesmerizing.
No words were spoken, but his jaw went slack and he buried himself deep inside of her when finishing. As Harry felt like he was unable to keep his moans down, he desperately kissed her, spurts of his cum filling Claire on an early, lazy Saturday morning in the kitchen. His fingers dented her hips as his orgasm seemed endless, fucking her bare. She felt amazing and he hadn’t expected anything less.
Both were panting as the ringing in Harry’s ears subsided. He relaxed a little, unclenching his muscles as he stroked up Claire’s sides, “Shit, you didn’t cum.” He panted out. She hummed, “That’s okay. You can make it up to me later.”
He breathed out a chuckle, it quickly disappearing as he heard a door upstairs. Claire’s eyes widened and Harry glanced around to reach for tissues. He slipped out of her, using the tissues to clean up any spilling of his cum. In an ideal world, he’d watch intently as it oozed out of her swollen cunt, possibly use his mouth on her decently this time.
But they didn’t have time. Footsteps from upstairs hurried down the stairs and he heard the giggling of two little boys as Claire hurried into the downstairs bathroom to clean up and get decent. Harry washed his hands and used a clean cloth to wipe down the countertop.
By the time Claire returned from the bathroom, the sight in front of her warmed her heart. Harry was playing around in the kitchen with Atlas and Finn. And everything just felt so normal. She walked up behind him as he stirred the pancake batter. It didn’t feel weird when she wrapped her arms around his form and pressed a kiss to his clothed shoulder, “Can we stay for breakfast?”
Harry glanced at her over his shoulder, seeing the softness in her eyes. He smiled and reached back further to bump his nose into hers, “You can stay forever.”
//
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finelinevogue · 11 months
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friends before fans
summary - you were harry’s girlfriend and now you’re just friends, but the fans still dislike you
word count: -1.5k
pairing: ex-boyfriend!harry x reader
a/n: some mentions of therapy, rehab and mental health issues. idk wtf this is but let me know if you enjoy!!!!
Being Harry Styles ex-girlfriend was hard.
Dating Harry was easy, but the aftermath of breaking up with him was devastating.
It was scary how quickly fans could turn on you. Harry has such a huge following, but you never thought you’d go through what you’ve gone through.
Times had been so tough over the past few years, after the breakup, to the point where you weren’t scared at the thought of dying.
Just because you’d broken up with Harry though, never meant that you’d fallen out of love.
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The newspaper headlines were the first to attack you.
Harry is so famous that the headline made the front page. Especially when you and Harry had been crowned as the most loved celebrity couple out there.
They didn’t know the truth though.
You were called toxic. Crazy. Manipulative and psychotic.
You would just call yourself depressed.
The year 2021 had not been a good year mentally for you and it constantly felt like you were dragging Harry down with you.
“Babe, it’s time to go meet our friends.” Harry said from the other room.
You were still laying in bed, unbothered to move because you just didn’t have the mental energy.
“Babe?” Harry called after no response from you.
“Y/N? We need to go now.”
“I can’t.” You said softly, no energy to speak louder.
You could hear Harry sigh loudly. Loud enough for you to know you’d upset him, but quiet enough to know he wasn’t going to argue with you.
He just quietly left instead, leaving you in bed with nothing but dark thoughts.
You could see how miserable you were making him, because of how miserable you were yourself. It only took one conversation to change everything.
“I think I need some space.” You told Harry, just quietly on the sofa next to him.
“Space?” Harry questioned.
“I n-need… I-I…. I want to go to therapy, H. I am scared I might do something stupid a-and I feel so sad all the time.” You started to sob.
“Baby… I.. I never never knew you felt this way.” Harry brought you over to him and sat you comfortably on his lap. He was crying too, ashamed he had not seen the signs of you feeling this bad.
“For a while now. I-I’m so sorry.”
“No apologies, baby. None at all. I love you so much and I will always love you so much. Let’s just get you loving yourself first, yeah?”
Harry had helped you find a rehabilitation centre for mental recovery and you were there for at least six months.
He was constantly there for you throughout the rehab process. He never once skipped the chance to visit you on visiting days. He paid for the entire process, even though you had been strongly against that.
Harry constantly reminded you how much you are loved, especially by him.
It took a while, but you finally got to a place where you could love yourself and life again.
When you left rehab, you realised just how bad things were in the social media world.
The moment your relationship was publicly announced as over, you were turned into a villain.
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You had stopped the relationship with Harry, solely because you couldn’t give him everything he deserved.
No matter, Harry waited for you. Still is.
You weren’t a celebrity. Instead, you were a good home friend of Harry’s. Your fame came from being attached to Harry.
Now your fame was for the wrong reasons.
You never cared about fame anyways, but the constant hate and abuse is tough.
Harry is still always there for you, though.
There was an endless stream of hate on Twitter towards you.
Even still 3 years on.
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A simple post on Instagram and everyone on social media would attack you. For being there. For existing.
Everything changed a while ago now.
Harry had texted you a couple of weeks back, out of the blue.
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Your hands were slightly sweaty as you walked through backstage to find the friends and family room.
Harry had secured you special tickets for all four Wembley dates, but you could only hope yourself to attend this last one.
You hadn’t seen Harry for months, still just friends.
Or exes. Depending from which angle you’re looking at it from.
You came today because you wanted to show your support for Harry, especially after the last few years you’ve put him through.
Holding the flowers in your none shaking hand, you entered the friends and family room.
It had been very long since you’d seen everyone. You found it difficult to see Harry’s family without Harry.
Luckily, Harry was in the room.
Dressed in comfortable clothes, he was a few hours before getting ready for night 4 at Wembley.
You stood to the back of the room, out of the way, since you didn’t feel secure enough to meet anyone. You often felt like, even though Harry always vouched for you, that his family still disliked you for putting their Harry through so much heartbreak.
What no one seemed to understand, though, was that Harry would endure that heartbreak all over again if it meant you could get help and become stronger again.
When Harry’s aunty turned around she spotted you. Either she didn’t realise it was you or was just looking into the distance, but because you thought she was glaring at you it made you feel super insecure.
Twitter was already trending your name because fans had spotted you outside the venue. Everyone was begging you to stay away from Harry.
Now his aunty looked like she meant the same thing.
You left the flowers on the table, that came with a card so he’d know who they’re off, and exited the room.
As you walked down the corridor, a security guard and must be fan stopped you.
“Are you Y/N L/N?” She asked.
“Yeah?”
“Wow. You have some unbelievable nerve being here.” Her words took you aback.
“I’m sorry?”
“Yeah too fucking right.” She scoffed and walked wherever she was meant to be.
You stood in the corridor and thought over what she’d just said to you. There has been no need to be so aggressive. She didn’t know anything about you or your situation. She can’t hurt you when she doesn’t understand the truth.
You were trying to repeat everything your therapist had taught you, but it was difficult with so many thoughts running through your mind.
Temporarily squeezing your eyes, you tried to press the negative thoughts away.
“Breathe.”
Your eyes shot open to see Harry in front of you.
It was amazing how Harry always seemed to meet you at the right place and at the right time whenever you needed him. It was never that you needed anybody. You needed him.
“It’s okay. I’m here.” Harry said, bringing a hand up to cup your cheek and softly stroke your cheek.
“You’re here.” You repeated to yourself.
“You’re alright, Y/N. We’re okay.”
Harry leaned into you and pressed a kiss to your forehead softly. You smiled at the familiar feeling.
“Hi.” You smiled shyly.
“Hello, you.”
“I arrived a little bit ago, but I got overwhelmed in that room.” You explained yourself.
“It’s okay. Mum saw you and said you looked sheepish. Came here as soon as she said. Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“Just don’t know whether I’m supposed to be here. People know i’m here and it’s… they’re not happy. I don’t want to cause any drama and—”
“Y/N, love, you’re not. They are causing the drama. I want you here. I’m okay with you being here. I am happy you’re here. That’s all that matters.”
Harry moved to hug you and you squeeze him back just as hard. His hugs always make you feel safe. He smells as warm and comforting as he feels.
“Please don’t leave.” He whispered against your face.
“I’m not. Just need you with me for a bit.”
“I’m more than okay with that.”
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During the show, Harry made a speech about you.
He was fed up with the negative press and the hate you get. It was time to say something.
“My ex-girlfriend is here tonight! She’s my favourite person. I hope you love her as much as I do. All m’songs are written about her too. I thought we’d try an oldie for tonight, so I can dedicate to my person. I hope you’ll all join in with me and sing out if you know the words. This is Sunflower.”
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freshloveforthefit · 2 months
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Always.
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!!TW!! Toxic household, mental health, anxiety/panicking
Summary : You and Nick used to be childhood friends, until him and his brothers moved to LA and you all lost contact with each other until one day changed it all.
Growing up you and Nick were inseparable, you were close with Matt and Chris too but not as much as Nick. You were usually over at the Sturniolo's house majority of the time since your house wasn't the best place at times. MaryLou and Jimmy had become more parents to you than your own, and the boys were like your brothers. They were the family you'd always wish was your own.
They all had an idea of why you never wanted to be home but you'd never told anyone the full extent of what happened most days.
You were so proud of the boys when they started to gain popularity on YouTube and social media, and their hard work paid off when they were able to move to LA. Sure they still lived in Boston too but only for a week or two every three or four months when they would have time to visit for a short time.
You hadn't realized that it would be harder to keep in touch with Nick, Matt, and Chris. Youd mostly text Nick but at times you would text the other two too.
But about a month after they moved to LA your texts and calls slowly become less and less until it's only a text every other month to make sure the others doing okay. You understood they were getting more busy though, you watched through their videos as they gained more fans and they'd even went on two tours. You had went to the Boston show and told them how proud you were to see them get the following they deserved. You hadn't seen them since them, whenever they were around you were busy with work. You never knew beforehand so you could take a day or two off to see them.
You felt terrible not seeing them but you were still living with your parents and had to keep working to pay the bills. Your parents rarely worked anymore they told you if you wanted to live there you had to pay the bills, all they did through the day was drink and sleep. You knew it could be worse though, it had been before but now you had a job to get out of the house. I mean twenty was a good age to move out at, you just needed to find the money to get an apartment.
Today had been a rough day at work and you were looking forward to coming home and enjoying your shower before heading to bed. What you weren't expecting was to see no one home and walk into your room being trashed. You look around seeing your posters ripped down from your walls, picture frames shattered on the ground, your clothes were all over you floor, and your books were off the bookshelf. Sitting on your clothes you found a note saying to pack your things and get out. Sure you should've expected this sooner or later, but you're the one who pays the bills. All your money you made went into keeping the house functional.
You quickly packed what you needed and could fit into a backpack and your old volleyball bag before your parents were back and saw you weren't gone yet. You knew that wouldn't end well for you. You made your way out the door looking back at the house, it was like a haunted house. The scuffs on the floor, scrapes on the walls, stains on the steps. It was all to show the memories, good and bad, that had happened, staying there as reminders of what you'd never forget. Memories that would stay with you for the rest of your life, the bad memories stick more than the good. You couldn't think of the last happy memory attached to the house.
Under different circumstances you would be ecstatic to leave this place you've had to live in for twenty years, but you barely had money and no where to stay. You started walking down the sidewalk just walking and thinking. You didn't know where you were going, how you'd pay for anything, or what other job you'd have to start now to make extra money.
You sat down on the curb of the sidewalk after a while not knowing what you were going to do. Your bags were getting heavy and you had to figure out something. You then had the idea to call MaryLou not knowing if you could stay there for a couple nights until you figured out a solution. She picked up after two rings.
"Y/n! Hi sweetie, how are you? It's been a while since I've heard from you," she said.
"Hi, I'm okay.. I was wondering if I could ask a favor?"
"Of course, what's wrong?," she asked.
"Could I maybe stay a couple nights at your guys house? My parents kicked me out and I- I don't know where else I can go.. it's just until I figure something out! I promise I won't overstay my welcome! And you don't have to say yes, I just thought I'd ask..." You start to ramble, trying to hold back tears.
"Y/n of course you can, you know you're never a burden here. We'd love to have you here! Can I ask why they kicked you out?," she asked.
"Um I'm not really sure the exact reason on why buy I should've expected it, they've never been happy with anything I do so why start now, right?," you laugh, trying to convince the both of you that you're okay. "But I'll explain more later, if that's okay."
Oh Y/n, I'm sorry. You know you'll always have a home here." She said.
"Thank you MaryLou. I'm going to walk over, I'll be there in a bit."
"That's a long walk, it's cold out. Do you want a ride?"
"No no, I don't want to inconvenience anyone I'll be okay walking."
"You're never an inconvenience sweetie. Listen, the boys just went to get food and film but I'll tell them to pick you up. Where are you?"
"Oh, I didn't know they were back home. I'm around the gas station, thank you really."
"Not a problem at all Y/n, I'll send them over." She said then hung up.
About ten minutes later Matt drove up in their van. Nick was the first out, opening the back door of the van and pulling into a hug.
"I missed you so much," he said.
"I missed you too Nick, " you said.
By the time Nick pulled away from the hig Chris and Matt were standing there and each hugged you too. You had missed them all, it was great to see then even if it wasn't in the best circumstances.
The four of you got back into the van and Matt drove you all back to their house in silence. You weren't sure what to say, so much had happened since you talked to them last for all four of you.
After talking to MaryLou when you got there you were more comfortable since you knew it was actually okay for you to stay there for a little bit. You knew that they liked you there but you couldn't stop yourself from overthinking. You had told her everything from your childhood, all the things that had happened that you didn't tell anyone. It helped you relax a bit more knowing someone else knew and you could talk to them about it.
You talked to Nick, Matt, and Chris after too explaining everything. You guys had a movie night while catching up on everything you'd missed from each others lives.
They also decided you could move to LA with them. They said they needed someone to help them around their house and with filming. You were happy you got your friends back and were able to have a job and house so you agreed to go with them.
In the end, everything in your life had worked itself out. You got out of your toxic house, got your friends back, got a job with your friends, got a house to live in, and got to move to LA and see the boys every day. It goes to show that even when it seems there's no way out, there's always something good in your future. Always.
NO WAY I WROTE AN ACTUAL STORYYYY. I hope it was good and you all enjoyed :) I tried my best with it, it'll probably be the last full fic for a while since I feel like I'm better at hcs and camera rolls, but feel free to give me constructive criticism. Thank you so much for 300 followers! This was the thank you gift lol, love you all 💓🫶
💓 Taglist : @matty-bear @lacysturniolo @freshloveee @mattsturnioloarchive @dwntwn-strnlo @patscorner @pepsiimaxx @ev3rgreenxtrees @thenickgirl @meetballmatt
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jarofstyles · 8 months
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Relaxation & Revelations
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Helloooo. I Hope you enjoy. we're getting into the more serious part now, but it's gotttta be done don't it? 
Check out our Patreon for exclusive writing and early access!
Warning- age gap/taboo relationship
WC- 3.3k
Previous part
____________
Y/N liked playing house with Harry.
It was a real problem, actually.
Her own apartment rarely saw her as she had been spending a lot of her time with her lover at his large, fancy and now mostly empty house. Y/N had helped Lia move in with her girlfriend, albeit a little bit fast in her opinion, she wasn’t one to judge. She was quite literally banging her father. All she could do was be supportive.
It was a weird mixed feeling in her chest. On one hand, she saw how fucked up it was. How she was betraying her trust, how she understood how it would disturb her if she had done the same- though no offense to her own, but she was safe in that aspect. It was not the best person to choose to fuck around with, but this aspect may be worse.
Falling in love with your best friend’s father is arguably worse.
Y/N knew it was going to blow up in her face at some point, but ever the optimist, she had decided to try and look at the positives and understand that whenever it came out, she would need to deal with the repercussions like an adult. Take whatever reaction there was and deal with it. It would be valid, regardless.
One of the mixed things was that Lia had caught on  about Harry seeing someone. She had wrinkled her nose and told Y/N that she had seen scratch marks on his back with no way he could cause them when she’d went to swim, that he had a hickey (that she had no idea Y/N had sucked onto his skin), and he had been noticeably happier. She had talked about how miserable he had been after the divorce, how for years he had hovered a bit because Lia had been his one focus, but she as glad that he was giving her space to breathe as an adult who was now out of college and supporting from a healthy distance.
“Y’know, I’m just happy he’s smiling again. He was whistling last time I came into his home office, ordering flowers. It’s gross because he’s my dad but cute because he deserves a second chance at love. Just like you!”
Y/N had felt both happy and guilty after that conversation.
Since moving out, Y/N had a steady drawer building in his closet. Her hair ties in a drawer in his bathroom. His room was their safe space considering Harry had built boundaries with Lia about it being his personal space when she got older, needing a room that wasn’t overrun with her stuff and a private place to breathe- just as he promised to stay out of her room. Y/N was free to lounge about his room without a care, use his giant marble bathroom to bathe and giggle with her bath bombs while Harry finished up work calls.
It was a nice little housewife roleplay. One Y/N realized could potentially be a reality if she played her cards right. Harry seemed to be just as into her, but she was still worried. He spoiled the shit out of her with his affection and newly, gifts, but she was always watching to make sure she didn’t overstep.
At some point they needed to have the dreaded ‘what are we’ talk, but right now? She really couldn’t risk messing it up. She was too happy, too comfortable with their slowly developing dynamic.
Sitting in the jacuzzi tub, the bubbles moved about as the jets massaged her back, a book in her hand as she enjoyed her bath. Harry’s bathroom was stupidly gorgeous. It had exquisite white and gray marble walls and floor, adding a touch of elegance to the room. The tub was surrounded by marble steps leading up to it, making getting in and out of the tub easy and safe, the depth of the tub something she hadn’t seen before.
The bathroom also had separate Mr & Missus sinks, each with their own marble countertops and elegant faucets. The Mr sink held a darker marble countertop, while the Missus sink had a lighter, veiny marble countertop. The sink was separated by a wide vanity mirror with those circular light bulbs to give the best possible lighting- though it was a tiny bit unforgiving, she could admit. No one needed to see pores that well. Underneath the vanities included cabinets and shelves for towels and other bathroom essentials- built in, Harry had provided. Made just for this particular bathroom, the black paint shiny and unscuffed.
The bathroom’s large shower with frosted glass entry doors also had a built-in bench. She could sit in the fucking shower! And… do other things. Harry liked that part and had shown her just how useful it could be.The space was complete with touches like gold-accented fixtures, eucalyptus hanging from the shower, monogrammed plushy white towels that probably cost more than her entire room at home, and a cozy, fluffy bathrobe hanging on the door- and he had sneakily brought one for her, too. The thought made her flustered. Harry was a very detail oriented person, and the things he could remember were slightly unsettling. He’d remembered her brand of face wash after seeing it once. One time!
Relaxing here had been a welcome part to her day after her shift. Being on her feet hadn’t done her well today, especially after being berated by entitled customers who thought that the prices were too high- as if Y/N herself made them. Being able to come here and crumble into Harry’s arms, have him wipe her pouty tears and promise her a meal after he finished his work for the day had made it significantly better.
“What’s the pretty girl reading?”
Y/N jumped, almost dropping the book into the foamy water as her heart pounded in her chest. She had been distracted and lost in thought, not hearing him enter in the slightest. “Fuck! You scared the shit out of me.” She squeaked, placing the narrowly saved book down on one of the steps outside the tub, her hand resting over her thundering heart.
“I wasn’t exactly quiet.” Harry laughed, that crooked grin making her want to sink down further into the bubbles. It was unfair that a man could be that devastatingly attractive. “Tripped over one of your shoes.”
Y/N pursed her lips together as she looked up at the ceiling, pretending she knew nothing about said shoe. “I dunno who’s shoe that could have been. Surely it wasn't mine!” Harry had warned her about it prior. Her two true bad habits were leaving her fake eyelashes on his nightstand- which he had once mistaken for a spider and squeaked, making Y/N laugh so hard she snorted- and leaving shoes in the middle of the room.
“Mm… I know I don’t own pink, fuzzy sandals.” He shot her a look. “”But I’ll forgive the discretion for a kiss.” Leaning over the foamy, rose and vanilla scented bathwater, he tilted her chin up and pressed his lips on to her own. The man took a seat on the side of the tub, Plaid trousers paired with a white button up that had the sleeves rolled up. His forearms looked particularly delicious, the vein she usually drooled over showing as he used his arm to hold himself up. Glasses sat in his hair, the reading pair not needed for seeing her face.
“Everything okay?” She chirped, looking at his tired eyes. Harry worked hard, despite having moved a lot of his days to work at home. He preferred it. As charming as he was, he was a homebody, a slight introvert. His work was better when he could stay home and focus.
“Mhm. Now it is.” He let out a sigh, taking one of her dampened hands in his own as he played with her fingers. “Had a long day of calls. Sort of takes the wind out of me. What was it you said- need to charge my what battery?” His eyes squinted as he tried to remember what she had told him a few weeks ago.
“Social battery?” An empathetic smile was given when he nodded. “I understand that. Mine too. We both have tomorrow off, though… So if you can stand seeing my mug for another day, we can sit and watch that show you wanted….” Even after a few months of this developing arrangement? Relationship? She felt a little nervous to invite herself to stay over.
Obviously, Harry did not feel the same. His face lit up at the suggestion, shaking his head at her self-dig. “I always want t’see your face.” He said seriously. “So pretty. My favorite one.” Leaning over, he playfully pinched her cheek to make her smile. “I think that’s a lovely idea. Don't really want to see anyone but you anyways.”
It was a little scary how quickly that had become true. Y/N had become his person very fast and it had happened without his permission.
It was easy with her. Once that tiny hint of awkwardness at the beginning where they didn’t know how to navigate the new development had fallen away, he found himself indulging in her. Spending more time than just the sex they had initially had. There was no way he could just simply fuck her and leave- even though he’s had to in the past- considering he’d always cared about her on at the very least, a human level. It had them planning nights away, Harry renting a hotel room for them for a night here or there, texting each other daily, even just to chat. She’s been so supportive and kind and he was fucked.
Her beaming grin nearly knocked the wind out of him, warm cheek leaning into his hand at his response. He could feel the smile against it, how she was flushed-  from more than just from the bath. Harry had that effect on her, had her smiling and blushing and he wanted to make her giggle all over again.
He always wanted to make the woman happy. More than he wanted to make her cum- and that was a fucking lot. This was a potential problem, sure, but he wasn’t about to give her up. He knew the risks that it was taking. Greatly upsetting his daughter, ruining a friendship, hurting his own relationship with her- but he just liked her so, so much.
——-
Y/N was older than Lia by 2 years, having started uni later because she wanted to work for a bit and save up some money for when she went. The girls had clicked immediately when they’d met in their third year. The first time she and Harry met, she had been polite. Sweet. Complimenting his car as she approached it with Lia, looking in interest and offering to help them both carry up her stuff into their apartment. Harry had found them both a good place and Y/N had offered to pay rent to him- but he gave her a very discounted rate. She had said she wasn’t comfortable accepting a free place which he could understand, but she was in uni. He’d feel like shit pocketing any of the money. So instead he had simply used the money to help buy them furniture when it broke, get them meals when it was a special occasion, putting it back into them.
He had seen her quite a few other times after the first meeting. She had begun to pop up all around, coming home with Lia on a break or a long weekend, going on their boat in that first summer, hanging around the house when Harry had worked more at the office. She’d become a fixture for a while. He’d enjoyed their conversations, her energy refreshing and sweet- but he hadn’t had any sort of feelings for her. Y/N had just been a kind girl that he appreciated talking to and being a good influence on his daughter. She’s been beautiful the entire time, sure. But there had been something those few months ago that had just made it all snap into place.
Last summer they hadn’t come over in a long while. Their last year of school had been hard on both of them, and he understood that they hadn’t wanted to take the trips back up to see him as often. He’d sent groceries and care packages for both of them, knowing that he had more than enough money. Y/N didn’t ask, but had become close with his daughter and had her straightened out a little bit. He wanted to treat her as well. The man had turned a blind eye to the credit card charges for clubs and bars because she had been on a straightened path for a while and her grades had improved.
Harry loved his daughter with his entire heart, but he knew that she had been a bit of a difficult friend for Y/N for a while. She had dragged her into things and made her play mother hen quite a few times. Sure, he knew she liked to have a good time out but there had been a period of time where he had gotten a few phone calls from a frantic Y/N asking if he could track Lia’s phone, or if he could see if she used the Uber account. Most of the time she had run off with a guy or girl and Harry had been apologetic those few times when Y/N had been the one to go off and find her. After the 3rd time, Harry had properly told Lia off and scolded her, letting her know that she was lucky to have a friend who cared as much for her as Y/N had and if she continued she would more than likely lose her for her own selfish actions.
Since then she had calmed- for the most part.
Having an empty home now, with Lia now moved in with her girlfriend, would have crushed Harry if it hadn’t been for Y/N. It had been different when she was at school, but knowing she left and didn’t necessarily want to come back except to visit had hurt his heart. He’d been lonely for a while, with the divorce and his daughter going away to school, but he had always counted on her coming back and staying for a while.
The man had a decent arrangement of friends, but only a few people he trusted. He was truly a homebody and kept a very tight knit inner circle, but it hadn’t been the same as having someone with him. Within arms reach. Someone who could lounge around in the living room while he worked and a face to greet him in the kitchen when he came out at lunch to grab a snack. He loved Mitch, but he knew he wouldn’t want to sit in his kitchen and make him a snack just out of the goodness of his heart like Y/N had been doing.
He also knew Mitch was going to be a bit shocked at the revelation of who he had been spending his time with lately as he sat at the bar with him- but he hadn’t expected him to choke on his beer, coughing up a storm as he grabbed at a napkin. His friend was usually calm, cool and collected, someone he thought would never be phased. Turns out, he had been wrong.
“You’ve been seeing who?” He asked once his throat was clear and his nose didn’t burn from the uptick of beer that had gone right up it.
“Y/N.” Harry said, blinking right back at him.
“As in, Y/N your daughter’s best friend? That one? Her old roommate?” He was speaking lowly and monotone, but he knew his friend. He knew he was absolutely shocked.
“Yes, her. Listen, I know it’s not ideal but it just… it happened. And I came to tell you because I’m so fucking happy but equally as terrified. Lia is going to be so upset and I don’t want that to happen, but things are getting deeper with Y/N and I finally-” he was interrupted by his friend cutting him off.
“Yes, Harry. Lia is more than likely going to be upset that her father and best friend are involved. It’s a natural thing. I’m positive she would never expect that.” He stressed. “It will be normal for her to be upset. I’d more than count on it.”
“Gee, thanks for the support.” Harry muttered, raising his glass to the words.
“No. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be happy, H. I’m saying you need to expect that. It’s the reality of the situation. Y/N and Lia are not going to be the same but you need to ask if that’s a risk you’re willing to take.” His face softened a little bit seeing the anxiety written clearly on Harry’s features. It had been so long since he had that little light in his eyes again, and no one would want to ruin it. But he had to be a good friend. “Listen… I want you to be happy, Harry. We all do. But you need to wait and see if this is what you truly want. Don’t jump into telling her yet. In other instances I’d say honesty is the best but… If this doesn't last, if you start to get cold feet, you don’t want to cause an upheaval for no reason.”
Mitch didn’t want to doom the relationship- even though he sort of suspected he had having some sort of midlife crisis, he won’t mention it- but he wanted Harry to think and not get ahead of himself. “Have you guys talked about it yet?”
Harry squirmed slightly in discomfort, eyes falling to the glass of amber liquid in his hands. They hadn’t. It was a lot of reading between the lines. A lot of going off of emotions. He had real feelings, but what if she didn’t? What if this was just a fun fling for her? She was a twenty-something year old. Did she want to settle down? He wasn’t in a rush, but he didn’t have time for games anymore. He was grown. Did Y/N want something serious?
It had progressed over time. At first, it was a bit of dirty, naughty fun. He liked her a lot as a person and the sex had been hot and tickled a taboo part of his fantasies, but it had grown. Evolved. She stayed with him half the week, she slept in his bed, curled up in his arms as she listened to him read the news on the phone in the morning. She made him coffee and brought it to him in his office, sat in his lap while he scrolled through emails. It had gotten to the point where they didn’t even have sex every day. They’d kiss, cuddle, they’d chat, but it felt a lot like a relationship. One he had always wanted when he was younger. Far from innocent, but pure in its own form.
They needed to discuss the emotional aspects of it, but he was scared. Terrified, even, to bring it up and potentially ruin or disturb the lovely routine and vibe they had now. He didn’t want to scare her away, but Mitch was right.
He needed to know if this was real.
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ninety-two-bees · 2 months
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happy birthday, james potter
jegulus microfic | 861 words | age gap + parenting au
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Regulus has never baked a cake before, and he’s not sure why he believed today would be the perfect day to learn. There are already a handful of failed attempts scattered across James’ kitchen. Some of them are…edible, but none of them are perfect. James deserves perfect on his birthday.
Technically Regulus isn’t supposed to be here at all. He’s supposed to be in class while James is at the museum with Harry, but taking one day off to treat his boyfriend on his birthday can’t do any harm, right? The countertops are almost entirely hidden by spilled ingredients and empty packages, but he finds space and perches on the counter with a mixing bowl in his arms.
The last batter was too thick, and this one seems suspiciously too runny, but he has no idea how to fix it. He even went as far as to call Barty and Evan, then Remus and Sirius—all of whom were entirely unhelpful. And now James’ kitchen is a mess.
Before he has a chance to put the next batch of cake mix in the oven, or even think about cleaning up, he hears the front door open and freezes in place. James is home.
Harry makes it to the kitchen first, walking right up to where Regulus is sitting and staring up with that wide bug-eyed stare Regulus has gotten so used to in the past year.
“Hi, buddy. Where’s your dad?” he asks, climbing off the countertop and swapping the mixing bowl out to pick Harry up instead. When Harry points over Regulus’ shoulder, he freezes up all over again.
“Please don’t be mad,” he begs softly, not daring to turn around to face James. His boyfriend has never been angry with him before, but there’s a first time for everything, right? And knowing Regulus’ luck, he has probably ruined James’ entire birthday.
James doesn’t say anything, but only a moment passes before Regulus feels familiar arms around his waist and a comforting chest against his back. He leans into James’ embrace instantly, struggling to fight off a smile as Harry wraps his arms around him too. This is his favourite place to be—in the arms of his family.
“Why would I be mad, baby?” James mumbles, pressing a kiss to the top of Regulus’ head. “You made cake!”
“I made a mess,” Regulus points out with a soft laugh.
One of the agreements within their relationship is that Regulus isn’t allowed to spend money on James until he finishes his degree and goes back to working full-time. It’s done wonders for the health of the bond between them, but Regulus still wanted to offer James something as a gift.
“Harry has made worse messes with much less time. We can clean it up together,” James insists. He lets go of Regulus as Regulus lowers Harry to the ground, and the two of them—three, if he counts Harry “helping”—make quick work of the baking disaster.
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Hours pass, all of which Regulus spends no more than a few feet away from James. They decorate the house together for his birthday, drop Harry off with his grandparents for the night, and kill the last bit of time before the party breaking in James’ new mattress.
“You really are getting old, you know.” Regulus has taken to straddling James’ lap on the living room couch despite the dozens of party guests around them. No matter how popular James is, Regulus knows he will always be at the centre of his boyfriend’s world. It’s as if the rest of the party doesn’t exist.
“I’m still a couple of years off forty! I’ve still got some youth left in me,” James argues. “And in fifteen years, when you’re this age, you’ll be saying the exact same thing.”
With laughter spilling from his lips, Regulus drops his head onto James’ chest, allowing James to wrap his arms around him in a warm embrace. If anyone is judging them for the blatant PDA, they don’t say anything
“I’m sorry I wasn’t able to give you anything for your birthday,” he mumbles against James’ neck, eyes fluttering shut as James’ fingers trail up and down the length of his spine.
They had to throw out all of the cakes Regulus attempted to make, and ended up buying one at the nearest supermarket instead. James had insisted that it’s the thought that counts, but Regulus still wishes he had done more.
“There is…one thing you could give me, but it’s entirely up to you.” Regulus lifts his head again, gazing at James with intense curiosity. “Move in with me.”
A moment passes between them, and Regulus is certain his heart beats twice as fast as it ever has before.
“You really mean it?” he whispers, voice laced with trembling disbelief.
“I really mean it,” James promises.
Another moment passes. And then; “Absolutely. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
One of James’ hands comes up to hold the back of Regulus’ head, and then they’re kissing. It must look as intense as it feels, because someone whistles and a few people laugh just before they pull apart, breathless.
“Happy birthday, Jamie.”
this microfic is based on james and regulus in be good to me (i beg of him) because i missed them <3
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moonchildstyles · 10 months
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thyme
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rosemary part five: harry's tired of hiding. y/n is there to listen
wordcount: 11.4k+
—————
The next time Harry saw morning light, he knew it was real with the way he could actually breathe under the rays. His eyes ached from the amount he had cried the night before, the memory of his nightmare having drained out along with every tear. 
Only a slice of light made it through the tightly drawn shades over the window, the sun bright enough Harry could only begin to assume how long they'd slept in. But, he wasn't going to argue with the hours; after his nightmare had cleared, that was the best sleep he'd had in years. With every blink of his heavy eyes, he gained more and more clarity. 
There was a part of him that wanted to be embarrassed about the way he had acted. The other night when she had tried to comfort him before was nothing compared to the way he had reacted last night. With her tucked carefully under his arm, her breathing even and eyes shuttered, he figured he could quell that awaiting shame for a little while longer. He didn't need to don his facade when she wasn't even awake to witness it. 
Moving cautiously, their shared pillow under his head shifted as he looked to her. That crack in the curtains allowed a splash of light to spill over his chest, leading the ray to fall over her eyes. The divine ribbon of light highlighted the curl of her lashes, the slope of her nose, and the delicate skin of her eyelids. The shadows he had seen under her eyes were now replaced with the reaching lengths of her lashes over her cheekbones. Baby hairs were wild around her face, messed from the way he had reached and grabbed for her the night before. Her hands were still tightly clutching his shirt in her palms, the fabric wrinkled and stretched in her direction.
Looking at her like this, Harry realized he hadn't ever stood a chance, had he? 
This whole thing—his facade, his over-nurtured walls, his control—all turned to dust the second she tapped his shoulder and asked about cookies. He should have known then that things were going to shift, even if he never thought it would turn out like this. 
All because of a gorgeous girl with a ribbon in her hair. 
Seeing her at peace for the first time in days, Harry knew that girl didn't deserve this—this dusty motel, this impromptu road trip, this much deception. 
He couldn't keep doing this to her. She had a life that he'd torn her from, all so he could drag her to different diners and gas stations, dank motels, and a cramped car for hours on end. She had friends who loved her, a job she woke up every morning happy to do, and a sweet little home that deserved to have someone like her live in it. 
It was Harry's mistakes that had caught up with them, and (Y/N) was the one being truly punished by them. She had to sleep in strange places, shower in less than five minutes if she wanted warm water, with questionable food waiting for her at every stop. Her nails even had chips in the paint, something he'd never seen before he tugged her into his mess. 
She didn't deserve this motel or his hands all over her when she didn't even know who she was sharing a bed with. 
He couldn't keep doing this to her. He was running out of money, and (Y/N) deserved to sleep in her own bed and be safe while she did. 
This all had to stop. Today. 
Yesterday's close call told him he wouldn't have to wait around very long for them to find him again. He didn't want (Y/N) to be in the middle of it when that happened. 
There was a plan to be made. Today was the day his past would have to catch his present if he wanted any kind of future. 
—————
"Are we leaving now?" 
(Y/N)'s tired eyes watched as Harry cleaned up the morning's breakfast (it was closer to lunch by the time she woke up, but it was still breakfast in his eyes). While she seemed to actually gain some real rest, her gaze was still tired and a little glassy as she followed him about the motel. 
She hadn't said a single word pertaining to what she had seen the night before, even though he could see those soft bits floating in her irises every time she matched his gaze. 
Looking over his shoulder, he saw her packing up her bag like she did every morning, ready and willing to follow him anywhere. Harry knew he was making the right decision. 
He couldn't be scared anymore. Not for her. 
"We're not leaving today." 
Her hands paused, buried in the bundle of clothes she had packed in her duffle, eyes wide as she looked at him. "What?" 
Taking in a deep breath, Harry sat down on the edge of the bed, the mattress creaking under his weight. He dropped his chin into his hands, his elbows propped up on his knees. "We're not running anymore." 
(Y/N) stood to the full of her height, awkwardly fiddling with her fingers. A pinch creased the space between her brows. "I-I don't think I understand." 
That lance of guilt found its way to a soft spot inside him, stabbing through every layer. He had kept her so far in the dark, and she still trusted him as if he deserved it. 
She didn't look away when he matched her eye contact, his own gaze unwavering as he spoke, "I don't want to run anymore, (Y/N)." 
"Okay," she drawled, gaze darting down as she tried to process what he was saying, "Um, are we going home then?" 
Harry's throat bobbed as he swallowed thickly around his tongue. He had to tell her. He almost wanted to tell her, even. This was the first time the story had ever banged against his chest, fighting to be let out. 
She deserved to know who she slept beside last night. 
"Can I tell you something?" 
(Y/N) stepped towards him on cautious feet, as if she were approaching a wounded animal. She took the spot on the bed beside him, looking at him through furrowed brows and worried eyes. 
"You're scaring me," was her whispered response, hands a nervous knot in her lap. 
A tick appeared in his jaw then. That was what burned him the most; he dreaded the fact that he was more than likely going to hear that from her again soon. 
Nonetheless, he wet his lips before taking in a deep breath, the story unraveling from his tongue. 
"When I was twenty, m'sister started her master's program at a new university, so we moved to the city—me, my mum, and m'sister. My mum wanted to stay close to her, and I didn't really care. I was willing to go wherever they were. But, a few months into her classes, m'sister got this boyfriend." He tried his best not to spit out the title through gritted teeth. Keeping himself in check, Harry settled enough to sit with his eyes on his fisted hands with knitted brows.
"I...He wasn't a good guy, I knew that jus' from the couple of friends I'd made even before he and m'sister got together. It wasn't like I hadn't believed it, but when I saw how he treated m'sister and the way she tried to hide it, I knew it was all true—everything I'd heard." He steeled himself as he felt his throat grow thick. He'd never said any of these things out loud. He was hearing the story for the first time just like she was. "He was... hurting her. Me and my mum didn't know what to do; any time we brought it up to Gemma she'd get really angry, or ignore us. We didn't know how to help. It was really hard for a while.
"But, she had stayed the weekend at his one time, and she came home with these bruises all over her neck. She tried to cover them and hide them with her sweater, but I saw them. I lost it." His hands pulsed in his lap, remembering the way the rage had bubbled in him like it was yesterday. "I had never been so angry in m'life, and Gemma was trying to calm me down but I was too far past any of that. I ended up going to her boyfriend's house that night, telling her and my mum I was seeing a friend. I don't think Gemma believed me but she didn't stop me.
"I don't even know what I thought I was going to do when I got there, honestly. I just wanted him to stop hurting my sister. He answered the door when I got there, and I jus' barged in and started yelling at him. I was telling him that he was going to stop hurting my sister or I was going to do something about it." He shook his head with a humorless laugh spilling from his lips, curls spilling across his forehead. How silly he had been; if only he'd known then what he knew now. "This guy—Trevor—, he laughed at me. I don't blame him now—I was some random kid running into his house threatening him as if I could actually follow through with any of it. But back then, I remember just getting so pissed. I couldn't believe he was going to laugh at me when I was telling him to stop beating m'sister. So, I tried to hit him." 
(Y/N), who had sat silently with her gaze stitched to Harry's face, had let out a soft gasp at his words. Harry's knee began to bounce, his sightless eyes never straying from the outlet in the wall he'd chosen as his focal point. "'S almost funny to think about how quickly he'd knocked me on my ass after that. It was then that I saw that there were a few other guys in the room with us, jus' watching the whole thing. I'd been too mad to see anything other than him when I got there, but now they were all sitting around laughing at me like this whole thing was a joke. I was so embarrassed, I didn't know what to do. I just sat there. 
"I remember he got in my face after that. He told me that if I ever tried to have a problem with him again, it would be very easy for something to happen to m'sister and my mum. I don't even know what I said back, but apparently it was funny enough to get everyone laughing again. I remember him looking around at all his friends, he said he liked me—even if I was a little stupid. The next time he looked at me, he told me that he did have something I could do for him if I really wanted him to leave Gemma alone. 
"I had jumped at the idea. I thought whatever it took, right? I jus' wanted to have m'sister back and my mum to have her daughter. I'd do anything. I must have been especially funny that day, because when I told them that, they all laughed again. He started walking around then, like he was looking for something but didn't really care if he found it or not. He was telling me that he liked me; I had to be brave if I jus' walked into his house and started yelling at him and tried to punch him. Trevor said he had the perfect job for me—if I really wanted to help m'sister anyway."
Harry's mind lingered on the next images the story conjured up. This was the moment everything changed for him. "I don't even know if I said anything to him after that, but I remember him pulling out a gun then, and handing it to me," Harry's throat felt too thick as he tried to swallow, "There was someone that needed to be dealt with, and if I did it for him, he'd stop calling m'sister. I don't think I said anything, but I remember I didn't take it from him right away, just sitting there staring at his hand. I guess I wasn't fast enough because he said if I didn't want to kill for him, he'd jus' get Gemma instead. It didn't make any difference to him." 
From the corner of his eye, he saw (Y/N) go still. "Harry," she whispered, her voice thin and wavering. 
Keeping his eyes forward, Harry shook his head. He couldn't look at her if he wanted to finish this story. He'd crumble if he saw her. 
"I don't really remember what happened after all that well. I think I told him okay, and he showed me how to use the gun, but that was it. They gave me an address and told me to get everything cleaned up by tomorrow morning." Harry's lungs felt heavy as he tried to find enough breath for the words he knew were coming next. That night turned into the first nightmare that followed him for years. He closed his eyes, squeezing his lids shut. "I waited until my mum and Gemma were asleep before I went to the address with the gun. This... The guy, he—uh—he owed m'sister's boyfriend a lot of money, apparently, and he wasn't planning on paying it back anytime soon. They wanted me to kill him because of that. And, I did." 
Behind his closed eyes, Harry saw in too great detail every moment in that dark apartment. His hands shook now just as badly as they did then. His stomach turned at the memory of blood splattering back on his face from the force of the bullet through his skull. He had been standing too close, he knew that now, but he wasn't as good of a shot back then to be much farther away. He forced himself out of that memory, his reality shifting the longer he lingered there. 
"The whole thing was a mess. I don't know how I didn't get caught. The whole time I was jus' thinking about my mum and m'sister, and how I wanted to keep them safe. That was all I was doing; I wasn't brave like Trevor had said. I was jus' stupid, but I didn't have a choice, right?" Shaking his head, Harry moved on. "I went back to Trevor's right after, and I threw up on his lawn twice before anyone realized I was there. When they did, I remember them laughing and asking me if I really did it. I jus' threw up again. By the time I had it together, I remember him telling me that I did a good job—that he was proud of me. He had sent someone after me to make sure everything was taken care of and I didn't tell anyone I shouldn't, and he said I couldn't have done a better job. I think I stopped listening then; I didn't want to be there when he said things like that after I knew what I'd done. 
"I had thought then that that was it. That I would always remember that night and would have to learn to be okay with it, but it was done and now my family was safe. I started thinking about whether or not I could convince them to move away, and that I'd probably need to start looking for a therapist. But," he choked out, feeling far away as he remembered those early plans, "I couldn't leave after that. He said he liked me." 
The heat of (Y/N)'s gaze never wavered from where it was stuck to his profile. He felt sick thinking about what could be hiding in her pupils as she listened to him. He feared to think she saw him for who he really was now: a rotten, disgusting, awful murderer. 
Forging on, Harry swallowed down the bile that rose in his throat. "He wanted me to keep working for him. He said that no one would suspect someone like me to be working those nights like that. He wanted to take advantage of that—even if I was messy and still a little stupid, he said. I couldn't leave even if I wanted to, anyway; they had too much on me. Jus' the one job would get me locked up if they wanted—or worse if they didn't want to wait that long to deal with me trying to get away. 
"It wasn't until the second job was done that m'sister stopped coming home with bruises. She started smiling more and talking to my mum again. She said that she broke up with her boyfriend and wanted to be serious about school again. It was like everything was almost normal, again." These were easy times for Harry to recall. He liked to remember his family like that. "There were times I had to get... closer to m'jobs than jus' with a gun. Those days were hard, but I'd come home and they'd be watching a movie or drinking wine together, and I'd tell myself it was worth it. It had to be. That's why I kept doing what Trevor wanted. 
"They had to know there was something going on, but they never asked any questions. Even if they did, it wasn't like I ever gave them anything clear. I jus' told them I was tired and working too much. It was like that for a really long time. I blocked a lot of it out, but it wasn't anything I ever saw a way out of; every plan ended with m'family or me dying, or otherwise getting really hurt. I did what I had to do and... got over it as best I could." 
Looking down at his hands, he flexed the stiff joints. Thin scars marred his skin, creases from years of work that took a toll on him. The inked cross in the pocket between his thumb and forefinger was fading. Harry cataloged every detail of his own hands as he fought to stay focused amid the sickening pit forming in his stomach. 
"A few years ago, there had been a rumor going around that someone had plans to take out the head—Trevor's dad. I had heard that it was a rival, but a few of the guys had said it was coming from someone on the inside—someone who thought they could run the whole thing better. I didn't really believe it, but it was the first time anything like that had gotten any of them talking. There'd been threats before, but this one felt more real than any of them with the way a couple of the guys were even planning on what to do if something changed. 
"It gave me hope, honestly. If it really was true, then there was going to be a night that was so chaotic and everyone's attention would be focused elsewhere enough that no one would notice if I disappeared. So, I started making plans. I saved any kind of money I made, and made arrangements for my mum and sister and tried to get everything taken care of that I could get away with. By the time I heard something was actually happening, I had everything in place for us. Trevor's dad was in the hospital, and probably wasn't going to make it out. 
"It was all chaos after that. Everyone was either trying to find whoever did it—planned it—and everyone else was with Trevor and his dad. No one was keeping track of anything or anyone. It was exactly what I'd hoped for. I went home that day and told my mum and sister that we needed to leave. Something bad had happened and to keep them safe we all needed to leave right then. I didn't have time to tell them what was going on, but I remember I told Gemma it had something to do with Trevor and I knew she knew. She helped me get my mum out after that; packing as much as they could carry and grabbing the essentials. I gave them the cash I'd saved, and they left." 
This was a night Harry had never revisited. Previous jobs of his always showed up in nightmares or ran on a loop when he couldn't sleep, but the last time he saw his family was a place he never allowed his brain to go. He didn't even realized he was tearing up until he felt the pressure behind his eyes and the knot in his throat.
"My mum asked me if I was coming with them, and I had to tell her no," he murmured, "Her and m'sister would be going together, but I had to go somewhere else. It was the only way they'd be safe. I would be the one that Trevor would go after, so if I stayed away then they wouldn't get dragged into it if I was found. I had everything planned out for them: a different car, a place for them to stay, and enough money to last until they figured something else out. It was all taken care of. I—" Harry choked on the lump in his throat. "That was the last time I saw them. I don't know where they are. 
"That was years ago, though. I've been going through different towns since then, jus' hiding. This is the first time I've ever been found." 
Silence fell over the motel room as Harry took in a deep breath, his shoulders squaring as he tried to center himself. He felt distant from where he sat on the edge of the bed. It was surreal hearing his story in his own voice instead of living the worst parts of it in dreams every night. It was even worse this way.
A lull passed, the weight of his words a heavy third entity between them. The static of (Y/N)'s presence prickled at his side. His knee kept bouncing, his body restless the longer his story hung in the air. He hadn't considered the aftermath being so quiet; he had imagined shouting, screaming, (Y/N) running away from him. He didn't know what to do with this.
"Harry?" 
He didn't make any move to acknowledge her. 
"Harry? Will you please look at me?" 
Her voice wavered as she pleaded with him. He couldn't ignore her like that, not when he could already picture the tears sparkling in her eyes.
His movements were stiff as he turned to look at her. He wasn't sure what he was going to find when he saw her (his predictions ranged from mortified, to terrified, to a punch to the face in hopes of incapacitating him long enough for her to run), but what he found wasn't on his list of ideas at all. She was looking at him with big, watery eyes, the irises glittering with softened edges. Her features were melted into sympathy-drawn lines, curving and gentle with a wobbly bottom lip and downturned brows. 
"I'm so sorry, Harry," she whispered to him, matching his eye contact just as earnestly as he. 
Listening to her, his brows pinched in the middle. "I-I don't—" His voice cut off, shaking his head as he floundered over his words. 
With a soft touch of her hand grazing over his shoulder, (Y/N) didn't pay his half-hearted denial any mind. "I-I'm so sorry that happened to you," she murmured, her voice as soft and thin as the tears in her eyes, "I can't even imagine, I don't—" 
Tears spilled over the rim of her eyes then, her voice breaking off. Her breathing came in shaky puffs, her hand on his arm tightening until her fingers were curled around his forearm. Sincerity filled her gaze as she looked at him, words failing her despite every soft sorrow in her eyes for him. 
This wasn't the kind of reaction he had been anticipating, not even a little. This worried him more than any other bout of anger or fear he had initially expected. 
"(Y/N)," he started, his voice low to match her own secretive tone despite the lack of others in their room, "I don't think I understand... I did really bad things, (Y/N), don't—I... Don't feel bad for me, yeah?" 
He could see her retaliation form on her cry-swollen lips, but before a single word could broach the air between them, she was cut off by her own whimpering cry. In a moment she had crumpled into him, dismissing the boundaries between their bodies as he was wrapped in a hug with her arms around his neck. 
Harry hesitated, his hands hovering over her back as his breathing stilled. She must really not understand the full breadth of the horrors he committed if she was still willing to touch him after learning his story. It was overwhelming in a lot of ways; this wasn't at all the kind of reaction he had ever thought anyone could have after finding out the kind of man he is, let alone someone like (Y/N). It was confusing. 
After a moment, he settled, reciprocating her hug and being that anchor for her if only for a few more moments until realization dawned. She buried her face in the brunt of his chest, his shirt growing damp from her tears and the heavy puffs of air that fanned out from her lips. Harry held her, petting his hands down her back and brushing her hair from her face the longer she melted against him. 
Soon enough, she pulled away from him, wet eyes glistening with a sniffly nose as she gazed up at him. 
With gentle graze of a hand he hadn't trusted in years, Harry brushed baby hairs out of (Y/N)'s face. She looked at him like she really believed that she should feel sorry for him, console him as if he were one of the many families he tore apart through the many jobs he worked. 
"(Y/N)," he started, voice more gentle than he thought he could manage with a lump in the back of his throat, "I don't think y'understand what I did." 
A fresh batch of tears welled up in her eyes as she shook her head, the hairs he'd just brushed out of her face now returning. "N-No, Harry, I do," she insisted, gaze genuine between the fluttering of her lashes as she blinked the tears away, "I know you wouldn't have d-done any of that if you'd had a choice—I know that. I-I'm so sorry that they took ad-advantage of you, and that you've been so a-alone." Her voice cut off then, a harsh breath just a hair away from a sob exhaling from her in a shudder. She could only manage a whisper when she recovered, "You don't deserve that." 
She broke down once more, falling into Harry's chest again. He was prepared this time, ready to hold her steady and snuggle her against him. He just hoped the hammering of his heart behind his ribs wouldn't disturb her. 
Harry's breathing came in stiff pulls as he tried to process what she was telling him. While he knew he wouldn't have done the things he did had there been another option for him—had he had the knowledge he has now, he would have done many things differently back then. He knew that, but that wasn't something he ever expected another to understand. He never thought he would have the courage to share his story aloud, let alone earn this kind of response from a listener. 
(Y/N) treated him as if he were the tragedy, not the villain. 
His own eyes began to burn, gaze going watery with the walls of the motel going mushy and melting in with the carpet. He couldn't remember the last time he cried for himself; he'd cried from fear from his nightmares and missing his family, but nothing to mourn the kind of life he could have lead had he known himself better. 
"I—" he started, the lump in his throat blocking his words before they had a chance. Harry's throat bobbed as he tried to swallow around the bundle, voice thick, "I hurt people, (Y/N). I killed them." His breathing caught around the harsh word. He just wanted (Y/N) to know, be clear with the kind of person she was snuggling against. "I ruined families jus' because I wanted to save mine." 
(Y/N) only held him tighter. "I can't blame you," she whispered against his throat, the words melting into his skin, "You were in an impossible situation. It was either you or someone else, and there was never going to be a right choice. I-I can't imagine..." 
Harry didn't say anything back, instead just holding her as she did the same for him. He wanted to listen to the things she was saying, make sense of them in the reality he had accepted as his for years now. But, it felt... unsettling. 
In his own head, in his heart, Harry knew he was put in a situation that no one should ever be in—make a decision that was more than just unfair. But, the longer he sat with himself, especially after finishing those jobs, he couldn't imagine that anyone would ever see it that way. It was easier to believe he was a monster when he figured the rest of the world would agree. He never saw himself as the one to be consoled, that he was too selfish a creature to have earned that kind of experience. 
"I'm a monster, (Y/N)," he murmured into the crown of her head, strands of hair muffling his words. 
"No, you're not," she immediately argued, "You're Harry." 
All those tears that had been funneling into his eyes from deep in his chest somewhere he never allowed to be free finally spilled over. Tracks were made down his cheeks, heating his skin and leaving sticky trails of salt. His breaths came out heavy and warm, uneven with he pulls through his nose. Squeezing his eyes shut, he cried silently into (Y/N)'s hair, allowing her to hold him while he took his turn crumbling.
There were still pounds of guilt and trauma sitting in the bars around his heart, but this was the first time those burdens hadn't felt so heavy. 
Sunshine through the windows could be felt on his back, bleeding through the t-shirt (Y/N) had latched within her grip the longer she held him. 
"Thank you," he sniffled into her hair. 
(Y/N) planted a delicate kiss to the column of his throat in response. 
The shadows in the motel room shifted the longer they sat bundled on the end of the bed, the sun journeying through the sky through the window. Harry didn't know how long they sat together with tangled limbs, leaking eyes, and sniffling noses, but he could have stayed there a lot longer had he been given the chance. He could barely remember the last time he'd had an actual hug before (Y/N) let alone a cuddle for at least an hour. 
But, he couldn't stay there forever. He told her that story for a reason. He couldn't abandon his plan now. 
Harry peeled away from her fist, her embrace around his neck staying firm enough to keep him from going too far as she gazed up at him. His eyes felt raw as he matched her contact. 
"I have to go, (Y/N)," he crooned, voice crackling. 
Her arms looped around his neck shifted with her hands settling firmly on the back of his shoulders. "What? Why?" she panicked some, clinging to him, "No, I don't want you to go, Harry." 
Petting her hair back, he tried to soothe her as best he could despite his clumsy movements. "But, we're not running anymore, remember? I need to deal with this." 
(Y/N)'s eyes rounded out as she gazed up at him. "I thought you meant we were going home." 
Shaking his head, Harry stayed gentle with her, "We can't yet—not while they're still looking for us. They all know about home now, and we can't go back when I know they'd follow us. I have to take care of them here. Before we do anything else." 
She looked uneasy now, gaze dropping down the planes of his face. "What do they want from you?" 
"I don't know," he shrugged as much as he could with her still wrapped in his arms, "They might want me to come back, or"—Harry steeled himself at the second prospect—"I might know too much to be left running around everywhere." 
Color drained from (Y/N)'s face as she listened to him. "Y-You think they might kill you?" 
Harry only shushed her, a tender hand on the back of her head guiding her back to her hiding space in the cubby of his neck when he saw fresh tears glimmering in her eyes. He didn't know what to say to something like that; confirming the horror didn't seem like a good idea, but he didn't have it in him to start lying right after coming clean like he has. His fingers threaded through her hair, blunt nails scratching at her scalp in soothing runs as she whimpered in his neck. 
As much as he might have wanted to stay just where he was, cuddling and hushing her as if her tears were the worst of his problems, but he couldn't push off the inevitable for much longer. 
Using his grip on the back of her neck, Harry pulled her away from her hiding place. He was greeted with swollen lips and red eyes he worried he wouldn't ever see normal again. He hoped against it all that he'd get to see her smile at least once more. 
"I need you to listen really well, okay, (Y/N)?" he asked her, thumb running a circuit of comforting circles on the side of her neck. 
She hesitated before she nodded. "But, I don't want you to leave." 
Despite it all, a genuine smile wriggled its way onto Harry's features. What a sweet thing she was, even in the face of everything he'd laid out for her. The first smile he'd made in days being offered to her. 
Harry kept silent to her protest, instead untangling himself from her hold. He stood to the full of his height, offering her his hand. With her palm pressed against his, she followed suit to stand beside him, their fingers laced together. 
He led them around the bed, inching towards the bedside table. With his free hand and (Y/N) behind him in the narrow channel between the bed and the wall, Harry pulled the drawer open. Inside, the black handgun he had stowed away rattling against the laminate. 
Swallowing, he took the firearm and turned to face her. He schooled his features into something stern and stoic. He wanted to be strong like he knew she needed him to be, especially when she saw what he was offering. 
"I need you to use this if someone comes looking for us," he told her, his voice even and low. 
(Y/N)'s eyes widened when she realized what she was looking at, her immediate. reaction coming in the form of her shaking head. "I-I don't—I'm not—" 
"I know," he cut her off, squeezing her hand in his, "I want this to be a last resort." Walking her back away from the side table, her brought her to the end of the bed, his back facing the window in case anyone decided to peek through the sliver between the curtains. "Hide first," he explained, "And, I don't want y'answering the door for anyone after I leave. Even if it's me, I have a key. Don't let me in even if I ask, I should be able to let myself in. Don't answer the door for anyone, especially if y'don't recognize the who's on the other side. Jus' hide, okay? Y'can hide in the bathroom if y'want, but if anyone gets in and tries to do anything to you, I need y'to use this and protect yourself." 
(Y/N) could have gone cold the way she was frozen still in front of him; if not for the heat of her hand in his, he would have assumed as much. She stared at the gun he was offering towards her as if a gift, the weapon sitting in his hand between them. 
"Can I show y'how to use it?" he asked her, gently trying to ease her into the non-option she had of protecting herself.
"Harry..." 
"I know," he said, "Please, (Y/N). I jus' need to be able to know that I won't be leaving y'to get hurt without a chance to protect yourself." 
Looking up at him through the fan of her lashes, he could see her resolve crumble away piece by piece. He hated to think about her having to use something like this as much as he was sure she did, but that didn't change the fact that someone was looking for her and wouldn't hesitate to hurt her if given the chance. 
"Okay," she peeped out, her hand in his slowly loosening as she grabbed for the gun. 
Her grip was loose and shaky as Harry tried to show her the basics. With the barrel aimed at the ground, he showed her how to switch the safety, something he only mimed as he didn't want to scare her more. He encouraged her to wrap both hands around the grip, finger curling around the trigger. 
"It's heavy," she said, her voice a quiet whimper as her hands continued to shake. 
"I know," he told her, adjusting her hold to ensure the recoil didn't harm her any more than a bone's rattle. If she had to use it, anyway. 
Silence settled over them as he ensured she would be as safe as she could be while he was gone.
"Both hands, okay?" he told her once more, her grip steadying the longer he allowed her to get used to the weight. "Every time y'pick it up, the barrel needs to be facing away from you. Even if the safety's on, I don't want y'aiming it anywhere near yourself."
"Okay," she said, another repetition of the small word through his instructions. She swallowed, her features twisted into something too scared for Harry's heart to not break over. "This is a last resort right? I-In case of an emergency." 
Harry's jaw ticked, hearing the waver in her voice. He hated knowing he was the reason she was preparing for an emergency like this. "Only in case of emergency, yeah." 
Taking the firearm out of her hands, he left it on the bed to (Y/N)'s relief. She wiped her hands off on her pants as he rifled through his duffle bag, finding the wad of cash he'd been using to fund their run. Taking the bundle to her, he pushed it into her empty hands. 
Before she could have a chance to shoot off a round of questions, Harry steeled himself. "(Y/N) look at me for a second." 
That tremor of fear she'd gained after dealing with the gun remained as she looked up at him with watery eyes. 
Shoving the cash into her hand, Harry ensured she was listening before he spoke. "If 'm not back by the morning, I need y'to leave. 'M going to leave the car for you, and you're going to take all of the money I have left, okay? Jus' get home. Don't wait for me or try to look for me, only worry about getting back home." 
Before he could even finish speaking, (Y/N) was shaking her head, protests on the tip of her tongue. "I'm not—" 
"Yes, you are," he insisted, unwilling to hear her argument, "I promised y'when we left that y'would make it home and be safe. This is the only way I can make sure I can keep that promise, even if 'm not the one taking y'home." When (Y/N) began to push against his hand with the money, he stayed solid where he stood, matching her eyes with unwavering contact. "I don't want to argue with you on this, (Y/N). This is final." 
Her gaze softened, matching the refractions in the tears pearling on her waterline. "Okay," she peeped after a pause, her voice barely above a whisper. 
With the bills wadded in her hand, Harry disregarded the space between them as he pulled her into a hug. She melted into his hold that was becoming familiar, burrowing her face into his neck with her hands around his middle. He curled himself around her, the tip of his nose buried in the hair on the top of her head, his eyes falling closed as he pulled in a deep breath. His arms around her pulsed, his heartbeat rattling in his chest. 
"'M sorry, (Y/N)," he murmured, lips brushing the crown of her head, "'M sorry I got y'involved in this." 
(Y/N) shook her head, "It's not your fault." 
While Harry couldn't accept that answer, he gave his own in the form of a kiss pressed to the top of her head. "I need to go now, okay?" he told her, voice muffled in her hair. 
"Where are you going?" she asked, voice small to match his. 
"Not too far, I don't think, since I want to leave y'the car," he said, trying to stitch together the details of his plan after such a vulnerable start to his day. 
Drawing away, she looked up at him with questioning eyes. "You think they'll find you? How?" 
Taking a deep breath, he shook his head. "'M sure they already have an idea of where 'm hiding." 
It was clear (Y/N) didn't enjoy his answer, but she didn't ask any more questions. Instead, she followed him quietly as he readied himself to meet his fate. While it wasn't a new feeling for him—accepting the fact that this outing might be his last—it was different knowing that someone would be waiting for him, knowing exactly what happened if he didn't make it back. It felt a lot more final this way. An omen—one he couldn't decide was good or bad. 
With everything ready, and a plan to grab the gun he had packed in the car, Harry moved towards the door. (Y/N) stopped him with a soft hand on his biceps.
"I'll see you tonight, right?" Her eyes were pleading as she looked up at him. 
"I'll try m'best." His gaze lingered on her. She still looked at him with softened eyes and wonderous gaze despite all the ugly secrets she now knew about him. His heart ached in his chest. "Thank you, (Y/N)." 
He placed his hand on her's where it was resting on his arm. He curled his fingers around her own, giving her a small squeeze before he peeled her touch away. 
All the way out the door, he could feel her eyes on him. He couldn't look back.
—————
(Y/N)'s legs felt cramped, the last six hours of having been curled up in the bathtub now showing in her aching muscles. Despite that, she didn't even think about stretching out, keeping herself bundled with her legs against her chest and arms looped around her shins. 
The sun had gone down hours ago, wiping away the final slice of light that was draped through the main room. The gun Harry had given her laid untouched, safety clicked, at her feet. Her breathing was the only sound in the silent room. 
Every time she could hear a set of feet trudging past the front door, her ears perked, trying to find any evidence that it might be Harry. Every time she came up with the opposite answer, her heart dropped an inch more. 
As much as she wanted to hear someone familiar, for a pair of those heavy footsteps to stop in front of her door, a sense of panic filled her whenever they drew too close. But, she still felt hopeless every time they moved on without a lingering second. She didn't want to be alone, but she feared what having the opposite would mean if she wished a little too hard. 
The otherwise silent room left her too much room to think about what Harry had told her today. 
She knew he didn't think of his story as much of a tragedy as it was. She didn't think he even realized just how terribly he was taken advantage of and convinced he had no choice but the most evil one. 
He was a victim, too. 
(Y/N) knew Harry. Despite all the walls he presented and maintained, she'd gotten glimpses as to who he was at his core through these last months and especially this past week. There was always an assumption that he had a few secrets hiding behind his barricades, but she never would have guessed them to be something of this nature. She couldn't even imagine what it would feel like to carry something like that around, no one there to support him.
There was no way to comprehend what it would feel like to be in Harry's shoes. Doing everything on his own for so long before running into her, allowing a small smidge of himself to show to her, only for them to land in dirty motels with tear-stains on a floral bedspread. 
Harry thought he was a monster, but (Y/N) could only consider him brave. He was the strongest person she knew.
There would be no way he wouldn't return to her, then, right? He was the strongest, smartest, most capable person she knew. Their teary cuddling couldn't be the last time she saw him. Right? 
Another set of voices—three different ones, this time—interrupted (Y/N)'s spiraling. Her hands clenched around her knees, her breathing pausing as she tried to listen as best she could through both the cracked bathroom door and the bolted room door. 
Soon enough, the volume peaks. They were right outside the door. (Y/N) could almost clearly make out the words through the thin walls. 
A beat later, not a second of lag, the voices began to retreat, the volume lowering until nothing but muffles were heard. They'd walked past. It wasn't Harry, none of them. 
Closing her eyes, (Y/N) knew she had to believe that Harry would come back. She couldn't see herself leaving here without him, even if time was something they were running out of. 
But, he promised her. He promised her he'd make sure she was safe. 
She knew Harry, and he wouldn't break his promises.
That was how she knew he would come back to her. 
—————
Despite the sore in her muscles and the exhaustion tugging at her eyelids, (Y/N) went stiff when she heard the doorknob jiggle. Not once in the hours since Harry left had anyone even lingered outside the door, let alone try to breach the lock. Her breathing stuck in her throat when the incessant noise continued. In lethargic movements, her hands held a tremor as she reached for the gun at her feet. 
She swore her heart stopped when the jiggling stopped, a muffled curse being heard from the other side of the door. The voice sounded familiar—the timbre, the tone, everything sounding like the one person she'd been waiting for. (Y/N) wanted to run to the door and let him in, her instincts pushing her to abandon post. But, she had to remember: Harry had a key, he'd let himself in. 
Though, a creeping argument in the back of her mind started, what if he lost his key? What if he was hurt, bleeding and aching for her help? What if he couldn't use his key and she was going to leave him to die out there all because of a flimsy rule he'd made before walking into battle? 
Her hands shook that much harder, her loose grip on the gun wavering. 
Over the roar of her heartbeat in her ears, (Y/N) heard the jamb give away, the sticky lock finally opening. The door was pushed open, whiny hinges creaking. She heard the door be closed after a set of heavy footsteps made their way into the motel, the lock being bolted into place once more. Only the sound of labored breathing replaced the sudden racket in the silent room. 
Please be Harry, please be Harry, please be Harry.
She tried to steady her hand on the firearm the longer the silence dragged on. 
"(Y/N)? Are you still here, love?" 
Tears sprung into (Y/N)'s eyes at that voice, relief flooding her system. She let go of the gun at her feet though her hands still shook as she stayed stuck in her pose in the bathtub. 
"Harry?" 
Those heavy footsteps that introduced him to the motel started again, the pace much faster as he crossed the room to her hiding spot. 
The second he appeared in the doorway, (Y/N) knew she was supposed to be scared of him. She was supposed to be at least wary of the swelling bruises beginning to form on his face, fingerprints denting the skin of his neck. Stray scratches littered his arms, specks of blood marring his skin. His hair was a mess, strands sticking at odd angles. The worst of it was blood that was clearly not his, staining his shirt, splatters reaching as far as his cheeks. The red looked especially vivid beside the green of his wild eyes and the creamy tone of his skin. His chest heaved with heavy breaths, his shoulders seeming wider in the doorway with his fists clenched at his sides. 
But, even with every cue telling her she should keep cowering away from him, her heart still lurched in her chest at the sight. Under all the mess and core, that was her Harry. She knew him, she trusted him, and he came back to her. How could she be scared of that?
Following the bruising beats of her heart, (Y/N) didn't hesitate before she was leaping out of her hiding place. Disregarding the stiff set of her muscles and the weapon left in the tub, she jumped through the bathroom before landing in his arms. 
"Harry!" she bubbled, clinging to him in a tight hug. Her legs were wrapped around his waist, with her arms around his neck with her cheek pressed to his. "Oh my god, you're okay, you're okay, Harry." 
Her tongue felt like mush in her mouth the way she could barely form a coherent thought before she was dissolving to babbles. She didn't even realize she was crying until she could taste the salt of her tears. At least that explained the sticky lump in the back of her throat, too heavy to talk around. 
Harry held her just as tightly, a strong arm supporting her underneath her thighs while the other roped around her waist. She could feel every breath he made, every ripple of his muscles; she even thought she could feel the thump of his heart. 
Pulling away from his neck, (Y/N) reared back just enough to see his face though she didn't go too far. Shifting her hold on him, she pushed his hair out of his face, his features watery and distorted through her tears. Smears of blood stained her palms, but (Y/N) didn't care; she could be grossed over the blood later, right now all she could see was Harry. Everything she had hoped for, for the last handful of hours had actually come true, how could she focus on anything else?
Eyes shining in the dim light of the bathroom, Harry looked up at her reverently. "'M here, (Y/N)," he murmured to her, voice broken. The longer he looked at her, that glimmer in his eyes rose until it was a shimmer of overfilled tears. "God, (Y/N)." 
Holding his cheeks in her palm, she nodded her head, understanding the overwhelming feeling she was sure he felt bloom in his chest. "What happened?" she whispered, voice thin.
Shaking his head, those same curls she had brushed out of his face fell over his forehead once more. Some strands were darkened with blood. "'S over," he told her, his own tone small to match her own, "'M out. They aren't going to bother me anymore. 'S really over." 
(Y/N) swallowed. "H-How?" 
His jaw tensed under her hands. Another shake of his head was granted. "I-I don't want to—I can't talk about that." With the way his eyes darted from her own, falling down her features in a glazed trail, she knew this wasn't something to push him on. "B-But 's done—(Y/N), 's over." 
Something in him snapped then, as if he heard himself for the first time. Harry crumbled then, his features twisting and flushing as rivers of tears fell from his eyes. He cried the way he did after his nightmares—heavy and nonstop. 
Harry clutched her to his body as he sobbed into her neck, having shielded himself in her hair once his breath started shuddering in his lungs. He murmured over and over It's over, it's over, it's over, into her skin, the mantra slicking her skin like the tears that ran down his cheeks. (Y/N) held him even as his grip gave out, sliding down his body until she was planted flat on her feet, her fingers running a soothing circuit through his dirty hair. 
Pressing her lips to the side of his head, (Y/N) felt her own voice thin as she spoke, "You did it, Harry. You're done." 
His arms around her pulsed, her body flush against his with his fingertips denting into her back from how tightly he held her. Hesitantly peeling himself away from where he was cuddled into her neck, he gazed at her with bright green eyes, bloodshot and tired. 
"I-I want to shower," he murmured to her, the first thing he managed to utter other than his disbelieved mantra. 
A gentle smile touched at (Y/N)'s cheeks, a breathless laugh exhaling through her nose, "Yeah?" When Harry nodded his head, his tears slowing though he didn't share in her amusement, she brushed her hand through his curls once more before beginning to separate from his hold. "Okay, just let me... I left your gun in the tub, then I lea—" 
The second she tried to shake off his grip and take her own touch away, Harry resisted with a shake of his head and his hold tightening. His arms were a rope around her waist, tying her to him. "No, no, no," he bubbled, desperation sinking into his eyes, "I-I don't want to be alone. Don't leave." 
(Y/N) paused where she stood, her eyes matching his watery gaze. His irises swam, softened and scarred as if she left the room, he would never see her again. She couldn't say no to him. 
Her throat bobbed as she swallowed. "I-I can stay, it's okay," she soothed him, "Did you—You want me to get in with you or stay in the bathroom?" 
As much as it felt odd to ask if he wanted her to shower with him despite the fact they'd never been more intimate than a few kisses over a week ago, (Y/N) felt like there were no longer lines between them given their circumstances. The things Harry shared with her and the time she spent adhered to his side were more intimate than sex. 
Nodding his head sent a few curls she had pushed back back over his forehead, some strands sticky and darker than the rest. "Get in with me," he rushed out, looking entirely too fragile for someone who just defended himself against any number of people out to get him, "Y'can say no, I-I jus' need you. Y-You make me feel okay, and-and—" 
She cut him off with a nod of her own head, her hand landing on his shoulder with a light squeeze to the cuff. It hurt seeing him try to explain himself when he didn't even seem to have fully processed the last day. "Okay, okay, I'll get in with you," she told him, eyes wide and matching his so he stayed with her, "I just... I don't want anything else happening." 
It was almost frantic the way he was quick to reject her thinking. His hands on her back pressed her closer to him. "Of course not. I jus'... I need you." 
After Harry let her break away from him, he still stayed close to her as clothing began to be dropped on the floor. Despite the static of his presence behind her and spying his bloody clothing from the corner of her eye, she didn't feel the warmth of his gaze on her skin as more and more was revealed. Even in the small space, he kept his back to her, eyes kept to himself even as his hands shook, aching to have the comfort of her touch. 
Down to her underwear, she saw Harry step into the bathtub first, the gun being plucked out of the basin and left on the countertop. From her peripheral, she saw him hesitate, as if he were afraid to both touch and let go of the firearm. Moments later, he stepped into the tub, twisting the temperature knobs with the kitschy mermaid curtain pulled closed. 
Letting out a breath, (Y/N) dropped the remainder of her clothing to the floor. While she was sure Harry had too much on his mind to be worrying about the appearance of her body, there was still something that felt unsettled knowing that this would be the first time he saw her naked. Before they'd even shared a handful of kisses, he was going to see her bare. If not for the fragile air around them, (Y/N) would have thought it was funny. 
Tugging back the curtain just enough, she stepped into the tub behind Harry. His back faced her as he wet his hair under the cold water, neither having the patience to wait for the stream to heat up like normal. More tattoos were revealed to her now that his arms were covered, along with scars that dotted his back she wished she didn't have to know about. 
At the sound of her joining him, Harry looked over his shoulder at her, hair dripping wet with pink tinted drops hitting the tub. His gaze didn't stray from her face as his eyes softened that much more just before he turned around to reach for her. He didn't pay any attention to her bare skin, every curve and dip being forgotten in favor of the comfort her touch could offer. 
His hands cupped the soft of her hips as he tugged her to his chest, fingertips denting the soft flesh. His skin was cold as he rested his forehead on hers, her body flush against his while the water showered from overhead. (Y/N)'s eyes fell to his chest, watching the way the water swirled the rusty drain in a cyclone of blood-stained water. Spots across his body showed more injuries than she previously noticed in the form of bruises and angry slashes. 
Harry didn't pay any of the pain he may have felt any mind, instead letting his eyes fall closed as he breathed her in. His hands on her hips shifted to loop around her waist just the way they had been before they stepped into the shower. His muscles relaxed further when the water began to warm, the spray beginning to fill the bathroom with steam. 
This felt more intimate than sex even to (Y/N). She had never just been held like this, with no implication of something more coming. 
He held her under the warm water as his breathing evened into steady paces, (Y/N) running her hands through his hair and his shoulders. She couldn't reach much of him with the way Harry held her, but she washed him as gently as she could with the places she could reach, allowing him to calm in her hold. Every now and then, his features twisted into something painful, silent tears falling from his eyes. She worried that she might be hurting him, but when he only held her tighter, she figured he had other things on his mind in those moments. 
Despite those moments when his fragility peeked out higher, this was the most calm she had ever seen him. Water ran down his body in cleaning rivers, taking away every bit of armor he had donned for the last however many years, leaving all of the soft bits behind. (Y/N) was used to see him stoic, clean from any kind of messy feeling or interaction, but that didn't mean she didn't still pick up on his restless hands, anxious gaze, or the constant need he seemed to have to be aware of everything at all times. She'd never seen him allow his brain to turn off like he was now. She hoped the only thing he felt now was relief. 
She was sure he was going to find a way to make this all his fault, that he should never be forgiven for the things he was forced to do today, but, if even for the next twenty minutes, she hoped he'd take this relief and comfort; she hoped he'd realized just how much he deserved to be treated gently. 
After the bathroom had sufficiently been filled with steam, the humidity clinging to every surface despite the still open bathroom door, (Y/N) asked, "Is it alright if I wash your hair?" Her fingers glided over his shoulders, touch as tender as her whispered voice. 
Harry hummed a cracked confirmation, his features giving that tell-tale twist as a slew of tears dripped down his cheeks. "Thank you," he breathed. 
Blinking his eyes open, Harry watched as she reached for one of the bottles he'd left on the ledge from his morning shower. It was an odd angle she had to work with, seeing as he didn't let her move very far away, out she'd work with it if this was all he wanted to feel more at ease. 
Ducking his head, he allowed her to lather his strands in the off-brand apple scented shampoo he'd purchased on sale a month prior. Suds formed between the waves, bright and sparkling against the dark color. Some bubbles popped up a pink hue, but (Y/N) didn't try to focus on what tinted them. 
Instead, she scratched her nails soothingly along his scalp, letting him sink into her that much more. "I love your hair, Harry," she murmured to him, words a secret only for him to hear. 
A watery voice piped up over the beating of the shower, "Yeah?" 
With a small smile touching the corner of her lips. He was cute like these, even if the circumstances were devastating. "Mhm," she hummed, "Your curls are perfect, especially since they've gotten longer. And, the color's very pretty with your eyes." 
His breathing labored just that much more as he listened to her, his grip on her tightening with her chest flush against his. "Me and my mum have the same eyes," is all he shared with her, his voice delicate enough to be blown away with the steam. 
"Really?" (Y/N) pushed, hoping he'd talk more about his family. She hoped the memory of them would comfort him. 
"Mhm," his hum came out on the whinier side, "Me, her, and m'sister." 
"I remember that picture you had" she told him, rinsing her hands of the suds before urging him towards the spray, "You're all very beautiful." 
Harry fell silent, allowing the water to wash away the blood that had stuck in his strands. The hot water had pushed a deeper flush onto his cheeks, making his eyes that much more green even if they did look a bit broken. 
(Y/N) didn't push him for more as she reached for his conditioner in a matching scent. He kept his grip tight on her as she massaged the cream through his curls, using this as more of an excuse to give him tender care as opposed to clean him. 
"What did your sister get her degrees in?" (Y/N) asked, thinking of the graduation picture he had displayed in his home. The only piece of decor he had. 
His gaze softened some as he thought about his family. "She did a lot with English and psychology," he started, "She wanted to be a writer at first, but before we left, I remember she had talked about wanting to do something to help people. She started looking into things for—um—mental health and people who had gone through trauma. I-I don't know what she's doing now, though." 
Listening, (Y/N)'s lips thinned. She didn't bother trying to push anymore after his last statement. She didn't want him focusing on the fact he didn't know what his family was doing, or even where in the world they were. 
Pushing him to rinse once more, Harry stepped out of the spray free of any blood on his body with his injuries clean and muscles softened under the warm water. His body didn't seem so heavy now, only tired. 
"Feel clean?" she asked, her own hair dripping wet against her back though she had no plans to wash the locks. 
He gave her a quiet nod, a sniffle scrunching his nose. 
For the first time since stepping into the shower, Harry's gaze strayed from the decent area of her face and the wall behind her, dropping down her body. She wasn't sure what he saw that had him scrunching his brows and his eyes turning sad once more. 
Before she could say much to distract him, Harry's hands began to shake on her back. "I don't deserve to touch you," he whispered, voice just small enough so it wouldn't break under the weight of his feelings, "Not after what I've done." 
His expression shifted with watery eyes and downturned lips. A cinch appeared between his brows. His lungs rattled in his chest though he didn't make any move to keep his hands off of her. 
Evening her breathing, (Y/N) did her best to keep a cap on her own feelings. She wanted Harry to feel like he could break down, be honest about his feelings, without worrying about her. She knew that if he cried any, he would take it as validation to his words, or push whatever he felt to the side in favor of doting over her. 
"Don't say that, Harry," she argued gently, reaching up to wrap her arms around his neck. She used the leverage of her hold to pull him down, their gazes matching. "You did what you had to do to protect yourself. Today, and every other day." 
Shaking his head, Harry's bottom lip wobbled with his tears mixing in with the water dripping down his face. "I-I—Don't—I...," he cut himself off with a deep breath being sucked in, his eyes squeezing closed as he continued, "'M disgusting—I don't deserve to touch you." 
Sweeping in a deep breath (Y/N) did her best to stay composed as she pulled his arms from the loop they made around her body. Blinking his eyes open, he looked defeated as if he really believed he had convinced her of his delusion and this was the punishment. Instead, (Y/N) pulled his palms to her face, her own hands guiding him. She held him steady as she puckered her lips and pressed kisses to his palms, the tip of her nose skimming his fingers as she spied him through the gaps. Finishing, she pressed them flat against her cheeks, her guiding hands staying atop to keep him from leaving her. 
"I love your hands," she told him, allowing him to catch the view of her willingly holding them to her skin, "They took care of me and kept me safe as much as you did. Be nice." 
A fresh batch of tears began to flood out of his eyes. Harry didn't say anything as he rested his forehead on hers. His hands on her skin turned solid on their own accord as he clung to her.
They stayed under the spray long enough for the water to run cold, clinging to one another.
—————
thyme represents courage; facing the past
eeeeep only one part left and now you know all the things about him!!! thank you so much for sticking w me for this! so sorry fi theres any mistakes and if you have any ideas or requests or anything please send them in!
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justlemmeadoreyou · 2 months
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Right person, Wrong time | Hopelessly Devoted to You Part 3
Summary: Part 3 to this. Elliot crosses a line, and you turn to Harry, once again.
Words: 2.5k
Warnings: Mentions of abuse, and domestic violence. Crying, cursing and alcohol too.
(previous part here) | (main masterlist)
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“What?!”
His face was in pure shock, anger clearly bubbling inside him. He had clenched his fists beside him shortly after that, 
You looked down at your lap, staring at your nails. 
“Look at me”
He demanded, almost ready to get up from the couch and storm at you if you didn’t listen.
You tilted your face up, looking directly into his eyes as he fumed with anger.
You dreaded this moment for so long. Tell him that you were going for a divorce. Even though Harry told you it would be better if you threw the divorce papers at his face, but you wanted to do it in a more civilized way.
After all, he had been your husband for 5 years, and there was a child involved.
“Yeah…” you blurted out after a breath or two, and he shook his head, smiling.
“You’re kidding, right? This is just some…what do they call it? Prank. A prank to make me softer, huh?”
You shook your head in no.
“You’re divorcing me?!” he asked, as if that wasn’t the entire point of discussion, and the exact sentence you had started the conversation with.
“Yeah.” you sighed.
He got up from his place, taking long strides and coming to you, hovering over you.
“You’re going to divorce me? You’re nothing, Y/n. How the fuck did you get the balls anyways? Huh? You met someone when you went on that little camping trip with Ellie?”
You never suspected him to find that out.
“Oh, I knew it. Should’ve just locked you at home and I should have been to go with her. Who is that bastard anyway? Huh? Fucking brainwashed you into believing that you can leave me? ME?!” he yelled.
You flinched slightly but never broke eye contact. You knew you had to be strong right now if you wanted things to go your way.
“I will leave you. I am going to leave you. And I’ll fucking make sure I take Ellie with me.” 
And that was when he lost it. He raised his hand at you, aiming to hit you across the face with it, but you stopped him. Grabbed his hand immediately and pushed him away, and he fell on the floor.
And then, you ran for your life.
You ran to the nearest room, and immediately locked it, placing a chair for extra safety.
A few moments passed, and the house was completely silent. You had been witty enough to leave Ellie at your mom’s, and had told her that you were going on a date with Elliot.
It was the complete opposite of what was happening currently.
You were pulled out of your thoughts by the sound of a vase breaking, and you knew he was at the peak. He would have killed you if you had been outside right now. 
Vases, a couple of utensils, and then you heard the front door close and shut. Then, a few moments later, his car drove away.
You sighed in relief, unlocking the door to go back and clean up the mess he had made.
***
Harry was stressed.
He knew he had to figure out everything perfectly, before you applied for the divorce because he knew Elliot the asshole would appeal in a family court. And he never wanted him to get the custody of little Ellie.
He would fight his best to make sure you get all you deserve, and he is left with nothing. He would make sure of it, because you deserve nothing less than the absolute best.
Maybe this was the hopeless romantic in him speaking, but he would have it the same either way.
He was out drinking after work that night, sitting alone on the bar and taking small sips of his martini.
Another gentleman came in shortly and sat beside him. Harry gave him a once over, and he could tell he had been in a fight.
His nostrils were flared, face was full of anger. His knuckles were red too, signaling he had broken stuff.
“Spiced rum, on the rocks' ' he said, and the bartender behind the bar nodded, before turning around and getting his drink ready.
Odd drink for a Thursday night, Harry thought.
As soon as he gave him the drink, he drank it all in a few sips, without stopping, and placed the glass back, a little too harshly, immediately ordering another.
An alcoholic.
He saw Harry eyeing him, so he spoke up, “Something wrong, man”” he asked, the frown on his face consistent.
He shook his head, speaking to him as politely as possible.
“No–uh, nothing, I was just curious about your drink”
Normally, someone would stop the conversation, minding their own business. But, he wanted to pry.
“Something weird about it?”
He shook his head quickly, because the last thing he wanted, was to get in a fight with a stranger, who was an alcoholic.
“Hmm”
He grunted, and he drank 4 more of the same drink. He called for the check, and fished his wallet from his pockets. He pulled out his card, and placed it on the table.
The bartender was busy with someone else, so Harry got a look at the name on it.
“Elliot Harris”
Like Y/n Harris.
So he was the Elliot who he was going to fight against a couple weeks later.
Sweet.
***
He didn’t go home that night. Maybe it was because of the news you had shared with him, or maybe it was because he never wanted to see your face again.
But he did want to know where Ellie was, so he called his parents. They said they didn’t have her, so he figured she would be with your parents, and without a second thought, began to drive to your place.
All the while he was drunk.
Harry had called you as soon as he got out of the bar and asked a million times if you were okay. You assured him that Elliot didn’t hit you, just tried to. But you were safe from your monster of a husband.
He let out a sigh of relief, before hanging up, but he also told you that he was quite drunk, and had driven away in a haste.
He wouldn’t come home, you knew that.
And he would go to your mom’s.
You dialled her number as soon as Harry hung up, and told her to lock all doors and windows, and put Ellie to sleep. Elliot was drunk, and would definitely go there and make a scene, all of which would get recorded in the security camera she had outside, and that would help your case.
And by God’s grace, it turned out exactly as you had anticipated, and everything was recorded, how he yelled and threw stuff at your gate, telling her to give him her daughter back. Thankfully, Ellie was asleep, and your mom had also made her wear noise-cancelling headphones.
And the next day, you gave the footage to Harry.
“You think–this would help us?” 
You had been super cautious since the morning and kept the house locked at all times. You changed the lock too, so he would not be able to enter without you letting him in.
And then you drove over to Harry’s law office and gave him the footage.
He was so happy about it. Not only was he an eyewitness to all that had happened, but they also had proof that he was an alcoholic and was abusive.
Harry was going to win this trial. He was sure of it. But would his feelings for you also win?
***
The next day, you drove Ellie to school. She was scared of her father, you could tell. But she still had no idea what was going on.
You had brought her home the day after. Ellliot hadn’t shown up for two days, so you figured he was staying at a hotel, still angry at you about the divorce. Good for all three of you.
Ellie was sitting on the seat beside you, a look of seriousness on her face, contrasting to the happiness that used to be when you drove her. You were dreading that she was going to ask something, and you wished it wasn’t so bad.
 “Is daddy angry, mommy?” she asked, and your heart fell. She was so sweet and innocent; but seeing her father get angry like that must have broken her heart.
“Yes, cupcake. But that was nothing to worry about, okay? Daddy is not angry anymore”
You lied.
“But–but mommy, why isn’t he coming home, then?”
“It’s ‘cause he has work in some other city”
You hoped she wouldn’t ask what work he had, or what city he was in. But her expression was more of a confused one.
“But–but mommy! He came to pick me up from school the other day, with some uncle”
“What?!”
Your heart raced as panic seized you. Elliot had come to pick Ellie up from school? With a stranger? The thought sent chills down your spine, your mind racing with worst-case scenarios. How could he be so reckless, especially after what had happened between you two?
Maintaining your composure for Ellie's sake, you gripped the steering wheel tighter, your mind racing with emotions. Fear, anger, and a profound sense of protectiveness surged within you, fueling your need to shield Ellie from any harm.
Taking a deep breath, you turned to Ellie, your voice calm but firm. "Ellie, can you tell me more about this uncle–who came with Daddy?"
Ellie hesitated, her gaze flickering with uncertainty. "He was big, Mommy. And he had tattoos all over his arms. Daddy said he was his friend, but I didn't recognize him. I didn't want to go with them."
Your heart etched at her words. How could he do something like that? How could he put Ellie in such danger, exposing her to a stranger without a second thought? What if something wrong happened? You shook your head, not wanting your mind to think more about it.
Turning to face her, you reached out and gently squeezed her hand, offering her a reassuring smile. "Ellie, sweetheart, I want you to know that no matter what happens, Mommy will always be here to keep you safe. You don't ever have to be afraid, okay?"
She nodded, her little fingers holding yours, and you felt so sad while dropping her off. You wanted to hold her close to you and never let her go.
Ellie walked out of the car, and came running to the other side. She kissed your cheek, murmuring, “I love you, mommy,” before kissing you once again, and walking inside, fixing her backpack that was falling off one shoulder.
And as you watched her walk away, you couldn’t help but think about what he had done. That was insane of him, and you were not going to let him get away with this so easily.
***
Harry was engrossed in paperwork when you reached his office. His brow furrowed in concentration, his mind fully immersed in the task at hand. But as soon as his eyes fell upon you, his expression softened, and a warm smile graced his lips.
You entered his office with a gloomy and scared face, your shoulders slumped with worries.
"Y/n," Harry greeted, his voice laced with concern as he rose from his seat. "Is everything alright? You look like you've seen a ghost."
You took a seat opposite to him. Harry's presence gave you comfort during the chaos.
"I...I don't know where to begin, Harry," you confessed, your voice barely above a whisper. 
"It's Elliot...he's...he's crossed a line, Harry. I'm scared for Ellie, for myself...I don't know what to do."
Harry's expression softened further, his eyes filled with empathy as he reached out and gently squeezed your hand. "Tell me everything, Y/n," he urged, his voice gentle but firm. "I'm here for you, whatever you need."
You opened up, telling him everything that your daughter had told you. His expression shifted as soon as he heard it all, his face now matching yours.
“I don’t know what to do, Harry. I–I feel so scared. Not for myself, but for Ellie. What if–wif, what if he took her away that day, Harry? What–what would I do, then? I–”
He got up from his chair, walking across the table and coming to sit by your side. He held your hand, tears welling in your eyes as you laid your head on his shoulders and cried.
"Take a deep breath, Y/n. We'll figure this out together," he reassured you. "I'm here for you," he said softly, his words a reminder that you were not alone in this fight. He was there for you, always. No matter how worse it got, no matter what happened.
“Thank–thank you, Harry” you said, and he nodded, stroking your back and trying to calm you down. 
Once you did calm down, you realized how close he was. Your head was now on his chest, right on his heart and you could hear his heartbeat thump in your ears. The two buttons of his shirt were unbuttoned, and the smell of his cologne invaded your senses.
Your heart fluttered as you felt him pull your hair away from your face, his fingertips touched your face, and you almost melted.
But, this was wrong. Growing feelings for him was wrong. He was a good friend, who was willing to help you out of your disaster of a marriage without taking charge. It would feel like you were taking advantage of him, pulling him into your already fucked up life.
And he probably definitely had a girlfriend. Given how handsome and kind he was, there was no way he wasn't taken.
You cursed yourself for even thinking about him that way. It was wrong, selfish and doomed to end badly. It always does when you love someone. They leave, or end up hurting you. 
However, Harry felt differently.
This was the most close to him you had gotten, and he was on cloud nine. His hand was on your shoulder, soothing you while your head lay on his chest.
He was happy that he was the one you turned to for comfort. He felt comfort knowing that he was the person you went to when you felt unsafe. His heart felt happy, even though it shouldn't, given the situation you were in. 
It’s always the damned situation, isn’t it?
Right person, wrong time.
♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡
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ashleigghh · 5 months
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Day 29- Star- Jegulus and Harry, 555 words
“There is your Uncle Sirius,” Regulus leans on the doorframe to the balcony, watching James hold their son tightly in his lap, the two of them looking at the sky where James was pointing, matching expressions on their faces. 
“And here is the most beautiful star of all,” James speaks quietly, adjusting his hand to point at the correct star, “Your Papa’s star, Regulus, the heart of the lion,”  James makes a roaring sound tickling Harry, who giggles and squirms in his grip, before settling back down to listen to James.
“It can be seen nearly the whole year, apart from a couple months where it’s spending some time close to the sun, which means we can’t see it at night,” James explains, and Regulus’ heart warms, he not only listened to his late-night rambles about the stars but went on to memorise the fact and share them with their son. 
“Why can’t he stay here?” Harry frowns as if this means Regulus has to go away for months every year and James laughs lightly, kissing the top of Harry’s head before pinching his cheek gently to get him to smile again.
“Your Papa stays here with us but the star, he has to spend time working to light up the night sky so he gets some time off to visit the one he loves, the sun.” Harry nods, understanding the story and making a connection, 
“Is that why Papa calls you his sun and you call him your star?” Harry giggles, finding it hilarious and it takes everything in Regulus to not go and scoop his son in his arms and hug him tight. 
“Exactly little genius,” James teases with a grin, making Harry laugh again, “it’s like how your Papa has to work during the day but comes home to us at night and then spends the holidays with us, does that make sense?” 
Harry hums, looking exactly like his mother when she’s thinking something through before he nods and turns into James so he can rest his head on James’ chest while he looks up at the sky. James holds him tightly, slightly cautious about the edge of the balcony even though Harry wouldn’t be able to get over the railing and looks down at him, 
“Are you tired? Do you want to go back inside?” Harry shakes his head but even from his place in the doorway, Regulus can see his drooping eyes and limpening neck. 
“Want to look at Papa’s star,” Harry  mumbles, snuggling into James' chest as he dozes off. Regulus makes his way into Harry’s room, picking up a teddy and a blanket before returning to the balcony, walking forward and passing the toy to Harry, who blindly takes it in the first dregs of slumber, clutching it close to his chest, 
“Hey,” James smiles up at his husband as Regulus tucks the blanket over Harry’s shoulders, 
“Hey,” Regulus whispers, not wanting to disturb Harry, and smiles back softly. 
“How much did you hear?” James grins, standing up carefully to carry Harry to his bedroom. 
“Apparently I’m the most beautiful star of all,” Regulus teases, walking away and leaving James to follow him down the hall to tuck their son into bed, admiring the life they’ve built together and the love he once never would’ve believed he deserved.
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Not The Same As It Was
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Summary : Harry feels like his life with his family has not been the same as it was. Would he leave his wife and child for the woman who has him craving for more?
Warnings : Angst
Word count: 5.9k
A/n: We're back with another oneshot 🥳This is our late entry to @harry-on-broadway 's fic challenge. Enjoy ❤️
Xoxo,
G and M
Masterlist
----------------------------------------
"So, where are we going?" Harry asked as he climbed onto the passenger seat of the car.
"Calm down, Styles, we ain't gonna kill you", one of the people inside the car laughed, "It's high time you had some actual fun, family life has changed you", another said.
"Hey… that's not true ", he complained as they started driving but that comment had planted a seed of doubt inside his brain.
"Well then, tell me, it's been a month since you came back from tour; how many times have you hung out with us, huh?", Neil, his friend asked. Harry stayed silent. After coming back home, he had spent all his time with his family. And now, he was back in the studio to work on the new album. He had been holed up there all day.
"Yup, that's exactly what I'm talking about, so shut up and have some fun with us tonight, everyone's gonna be there. Just let the old Harry out for this once. You can go back to your boring self tomorrow."
—----------------------------------------------
"Why are you late?Where were you, Harry?"
His head snapped up as he looked at Y/N, his wife. He was sitting on the couch, drinking a glass of water.
"Out", he murmured, placing the glass on the table. "You could've called or texted me, or at least picked up when I called you", she was annoyed.
"Well, I forgot. What's the big deal?" He stood up, placing the glass onto the coffee table with a loud thud and tried to walk towards the bedroom.
"You forgot? We were worried, you know? Beryl went to sleep asking for you. Where were you, Harry? You reek of alcohol." She was getting angrier by the minute.
"What are you on about, Y/N? Can't I just have one night away from all the responsibilities? Can I just enjoy myself for once? Ugh. They were right, family life sure does drag you down", he chuckled meanly.
“What?” she mumbled in disbelief. She loved their little family; her, Harry and their little girl, Beryl. She was so happy to have the most adorable baby on the planet and the best husband. She loved her family with her whole heart and believed he did too, until those poisonous words slipped from his mouth just now. They had talked, even before they had kids, about how important it was for the mental and overall well being of children to have their parents with them. Harry had treated his family as his first priority, until now. Did he really think that? That his family was dragging him down? She could feel bile rising in her throat.
“What? You know I’m right”, he shrugged.
“Don’t say things you don’t mean Harry, you’re clearly drunk. And don’t bring Beryl into this, you knew what you were signing up for when we knew we were pregnant. And you seemed so happy then.” tears pooled in her eyes.
He sighed,
“You know how happy I am to have a family, I just meant that I deserve a break from all this burden, you know.”
“Yup, got your message loud and clear, Styles.”, she said, walking towards their bedroom.
“Shit, Y/N I didn't mean it like that. I just…”
“Save it, Harry. I'll make sure that you won't have to carry our burden.” she said and walked into their bedroom.
He seemed to realize the weight of his words fast enough as the alcohol slowly left his system. He entered the bedroom and saw her coming out of the shower in her pajamas, her eyes were red and puffy. She did not even bother to look at him as he sat on the edge of the bed, fingers fumbling nervously.
“Y/N, baby… just listen to me, I-”
She did not even spare a glance at him and left the room. His eyes started welling up with tears as he heard the sound of Beryl’s room slam shut. He sat against the headboard, as he realized what he had done. Why did he say those words to her, he loved his family dearly, right? Right?
—---------------------------------------------
Y/n could not sleep that night. Were they a burden to him? Was he just tolerating their presence? A mere repayment for having loved her once? She held her daughter tight as she let her tears flow down her face and wet the pillow. Somewhere in the middle of doubting herself and trying to remember if she ever had tied him down, she fell asleep.
—----------------------------------------------
Harry couldn't sleep as well. He was not used to sleeping without her. He knew he had said some hurtful things, but didn't know how to make it better. He woke up early and went for a run to clear his head. He'll just buy her something to make up for it. She was his wife, she wouldn't leave him, would she?
—------------------------------------------------
He had come after the time Y/N and Beryl had left for work and school. He was supposed to take Beryl to school but he purposely avoided coming home early. He knew it would be difficult for him to face Y/N after last night's incidents and he figured that she would take their kid to school. And he was right. Both of them had left.
He placed the necklace he bought for her on the table and wrapped it up, placing a little bow on top. A perfect apology gift. She would surely forgive him after seeing that he had bought her an expensive necklace, right? Well, that's what he thought.
He took the gift to their bedroom and set it down on her dressing table for her to find after she comes home from work and went down to the kitchen, only to see that she had made him breakfast before she left. Guilt tugged at his heart. It would have been so hard for her today, having to get Beryl ready for school, cooking for everyone and then getting to her own workplace, all on her own. He should have been there, helping her with the chores. Y/N was a fashion designer. She had a boutique that sold wedding dresses. Since she had to stay late at work than usual, she had told Harry when he came home from tour that they should hire a nanny for Beryl to stay till she comes home. But Harry was quick to discard that suggestion and said that he'd be there and there was no need to hire anyone.
Harry would apologize to her tonight, he'll pick up Beryl from school, take her to get ice cream. Then he'll come home and make Beryl dinner and get her to sleep by the time Y/N comes home. She had to stay late at work, as her sales were going crazy. Then, when Y/N comes home, he'll set up a nice bubble bath and let her relax. He'll set up a nice romantic dinner and apologize to her. He'll give her the gift he bought her and tell her how much he loves her. If she lets him, he'll show her how much she means to him.
Harry had it all planned. He quickly took a shower, had breakfast and drove over to the studio.
—----------------------------------
Harry had a productive day at work. He was able to get a lot of work done. He could feel the rush of ideas running through his mind.
During the lunch break, he had sent Y/N a text saying that he'll pick up Beryl from school in the evening. She responded in half an hour.
Y/N/N❤️: It's okay, Harry, I'll pick her up. I leave work early today.
—-------------------------------------
"Mate, are you coming or not? ", Jeremy asked impatiently.
"No, man, I've gotta get home early today, you guys go on without me", with that, he was off.
Harry had planned on getting home before Y/N but he didn't know when she would be home. Yes, she had informed him that she'd leave early, but he didn't know the exact time.
He saw her car as he drove into the driveway and realized that his plans had failed. The fresh aroma of food hit his nose as he opened the door and walked in. Y/N was cooking. Beryl was sat on the barstool near the kitchen counter, doing her homework and asking Y/N for help whenever she was met with difficult questions.
Taking off his shoes, Harry carefully walked over to them, a little nervous.
"Daddy, I missed you", Beryl pouted, seeing him. Y/N turned around at the mention of him and their eyes met for a millisecond before she turned away, an expression on her face he couldn't decipher. A wave of disquiet went through him, it was like being doused with ice cold water.
"I missed you too baby", he said, leaning down and placing kisses on her forehead, making her giggle.
"Where were you last night, daddy? I wanted to show you the picture I drew." She frowned.
"Daddy was late, kiddo." He said softly, looking over at Y/N who made no effort to turn around.
"You know what? You could show me the picture now." He said, making her smile.
"Okay daddy, can you put me down?" She asked, holding her arms out. Harry moved closer, picked her up and put her down. She ran off to her room in excitement. Harry walked over to where his wife was chopping tomatoes. He sat on the counter and gently called her name.
“Hey. Look at me.”, he said softly.
She hesitantly looked up.
"I am so sorry, love. I shouldn't have said that. I was drunk and not in my right mind. Will you forgive me?"
"I know, Harry. It's okay, I forgive you", she said in a small voice.
Well, that was easy, he thought. He didn't know why she didn't even put up a fight and stand up for herself because he was clearly in the wrong here.
"Really? I know I was a dick, baby, it won't happen again."
"It's fine, Harry. Don't worry about it" , she gave him a small smile. He knew she was still hurt by the way her smile did not reach her eyes. But he decided not to ask about that. She would be happy after getting that gift. He was about to tell her about it when they were interrupted by the pitter patter of two small feet. Beryl was running over to him with a picture in her hand.
—------------------------------------
After dinner, when Y/N took Beryl to her room to put her to bed, Harry took a quick shower. He did not see her in their room when he got out of the shower.
Was she going to sleep in Beryl's room?
Harry walked over to her room, only to see Beryl sleeping, clutching her reindeer plushie that Harry bought her when he came back from tour last month. It had become her favourite one. Harry smiled to himself and closed the door, walking downstairs, looking for his wife.
There she was, wiping down the kitchen counter and cleaning up. He gently slipped behind her, hugging her from behind and placing a kiss onto her cheek. He sensed her body suddenly stiffening but decided not to comment on it.
Swallowing down his hurt, he gently whispered in her ear,
"Come to bed, baby"
"I'll be there in a few minutes, Harry. You can go to bed if you want to, I'll finish this up and be there", she sounded nervous, he noticed.
"No, I don't want to sleep without you, besides, I have something to give you. I'll wait. "
He helped her clean and led her to their bedroom, handing her the neatly wrapped gift.
"What is it, Harry?" ,she asked .
She had never used a pet name after that encounter. He hated it when she used to call him by his name. She was still hurt, he realised.
"Um, it is a… peace offering. I'm so sorry for what I said, I didn't mean it. So I bought you a necklace as an apology. " He said, suddenly getting nervous.
Sighing, she said,
"You didn't have to, Harry."
"I know, but I wanted to."
"Thank you." She said, without even opening it.
"Can I kiss you? ", he asked apprehensively.
She nodded.
He leaned in, pressing his lips onto hers. It was soft and tender. He held onto her waist and pulled her closer. Both of them did not want to pull away. It was when his hands started wandering over her hips and waist that she pulled back. He looked at her with a small frown.
"I… uh… not today, Harry", she stuttered.
"Um… yeah, sure", he said.
When they went to sleep that night, he hugged her closer to him.
—--------------------------------------
It's been a week since that incident. They were getting back to normal but Harry couldn't help but notice a few changes in his wife's behaviour. She would do all the household chores without asking him for any help, she would cook, and clean, leaving Harry with nothing to do. On one hand, it was good because he could devote his time to the task at hand: the new album. But on the other hand, he found it weird that his usually feisty wife had turned into a housewife. She didn't complain about anything, balancing her housework and kid along with her equally demanding job. She took Beryl to school in the morning and picked her up in the evening.
Their schedules had changed as well. Y/N would wake up early, cook them breakfast and get herself and Beryl ready for work. Harry wouldn't even be awake till they're gone. After waking up, Harry would freshen up and go to the studio. In the evening, Y/N and Beryl would be back, she'd cook them dinner, feed Beryl and get her to bed. Harry would be home late. There were days where they wouldn't even see each other. Y/N had changed her schedule in such a way that she was able to leave in time to get Beryl from school. Harry and Y/N did not really get any alone time. They hadn't even really talked to each other in a week.
The next week seemed so hectic though. Y/N had been busier than ever with her sales going up. She couldn't leave early from work. So, Harry had to take Beryl to school and pick her up.
It was a Friday when they completed and recorded the first song for the new album.
"We'll go celebrate,'' he heard his friends say. He felt like it was only fair for him to go with them as he had been bailing on them for a little while.
Will you pick up Beryl from her dance class today? I don't think I can make it, Harry hastily typed up and sent the message to his wife and without even waiting for a reply, walked towards the car that was waiting for him outside the studio.
—---------------------------------------
They had gone to this new bar near the studio.
It felt liberating for him to be away from work or family for a little while. The drinks had loosened him up. He found the whole having - fun thing refreshing.
It's been a while since he has had some fun, not caring about anything, just living in the present. The alcohol seemed to make him forget about everything. He let himself free, dancing with random strangers and drinking as much as he wanted.
"Hey, Harry, I want you to meet someone," Neil called out over the loud music as Harry was downing another shot of tequila.
With him stood a brunette, tall and gorgeous. She had beautiful hazel eyes which reminded him of Belgian chocolate. She had curves in all the right places. She was wearing a silver bodycon dress which hugged her figure and left little to the imagination.
"Hi, I am Kara", she held her hand out.
"Kara?" He asked, his accent becoming thicker due to him being drunk.
"No, Kara, K-A-R-A" she said.
"That's what I said. I'm English, I have an accent, lord…", he laughed, making her giggle.
He shook her outstretched hand,
"I'm Harry."
"I know", she giggled again.
"So, Harry, this is Kara, my friend from uni, she's a choreographer. She is here for some work related thing, she'll be here for a few months."
"It's nice to meet you ", he said.
"Likewise," she replied with a smile.
They spent the rest of the night talking. Harry found that she had a really nice personality. They talked about many things and he noticed that she had strong opinions about everything, a bold woman, she was.
When it was time for her to leave, she said her goodbyes to everyone in their friend group. Finally, she walked over to Harry,
"It's been great finally meeting you. I've heard so much about you and now I know what they say is true, you're really a gentleman. I'm going to go now, see you around." She leaned in for a hug. He returned the hug, blushing at her praise. She smelled good, like wild berries.
"Bye, see you around", he smiled at her.
He felt that he had taken the right decision to go out, it proved to be a good relaxation technique. He needed to do this often.
It was past midnight when he came home. Beryl was asleep, so was Y/N. He went straight into the kitchen to drink some water and saw a note on the fridge. Dinner is in the fridge, it said, with a hand-drawn red heart on it - Beryl drew it, he realised. He smiled to himself and sauntered over to his room. Y/N was fast asleep. He stripped down to his boxers and climbed under the covers.
For once, Harry Styles felt like he was leading a routine life. A boring one.
—----------------------------------------------
Days passed. Harry had started going out with his friends every now and then. He wasn't even home on weekends. They went to pubs and parties every week. Kara and Harry had become closer than ever. She always tagged along with Neil and gradually, she became an unavoidable member of their friend group. She used to visit his studio whenever she was free.
"Do you want to grab a bite? There's this new bakery I wanted to try", Kara asked one day, when she came to the studio. No one else was there. Harry had to finish up a lyric, and was working on it when Kara called and informed him that she was coming over.
"Yeah, sure, I'd like that"
*****
"Wow, these are delicious", Harry said, as he took another bite from a macaron.
"Well, If you want any advice on anything, you know who to call", Kara laughed, lightly patting his arm.
Both of them had become really touchy with each other. Harry wondered if she was into him. He had felt a spark between them, an invisible pull guiding him towards her. She gave him new ideas and put in her suggestions whenever he was working on something when she went over to the studio. When was the last time Y/N did that? She was always busy with work. When was the last time they had sex? Hell, when was the last time they really talked to each other?
Kara brought out something in him, something fresh, vibrant and lively. He felt like he had become his younger self again. The mood was always playful and silly when she was around.
"Of course", he laughed.
"Can I ask you something, Kara?" , he suddenly asked.
"Why the formalities, H? You know you can ask me anything -"
His phone rang, cutting her off. Huffing, he looked at the screen to check who it was. Y/N. Way to ruin a moment.
"Hello? I'm busy, I'll call you back, okay?", He turned the phone off and turned towards Kara,
"Who was it?"
"Nobody, you were saying?"
"Actually you were about to ask me something. What was it?"
"Yeah, right. So um… I just wanted to erm… know if you were interested in choreographing a dance sequence for my new music video."
"Oh my God… really? I would love that, H", she squealed excitedly.
"So that's settled then, can we go over to the studio and discuss the details with the rest of the team?"
"Sure, let's go"
* * *
What Harry did not know was that his wife was actually outside the cafeteria he was in. She had gone to run a few errands when she saw him there. She called him to let him know that she was there. She was heartbroken after seeing him walk out with a woman, happy and laughing. Might be a friend, don't jump into conclusions, Y/N, she reminded herself.
The next day, deuxmoi had posted that they had sighted Harry outside the studio with a woman. Harry was worried that Y/N would be mad at him, but she didn't say anything. So, Harry was pretty sure that she didn't see it and was so relieved, to say the least.
But she did. She saw every single one of those articles that revealed to her Harry's location when he himself didn't. She heard about Kara doing the choreography from the tabloids, not him. She had seen the way he looked at her and she blamed herself for it.
—-------------------------------------
"And cut…" the director shouted and the room erupted into loud noises.
"It was great, Harry. Kara, you did an amazing job, this is going to break the internet, I can feel it in my kneecaps", he laughed.
The music video for Harry's new single, Medicine, was choreographed by none other than Kara herself. More importantly, she was the one who performed it with him.
The video showed Harry sitting at a bar, just like how they met for the first time, Kara walking towards him and talking to him. Then suddenly, everyone in the bar disappears, leaving a spotlight on Kara and Harry. They stand up and walk towards the middle of the room, performing a seductive, sensual dance sequence. The video ends when they lean in for a kiss and the screen fades to black.
They had excellent chemistry on screen, everyone said.
It wasn't just on screen, Harry wasn't faking it. He enjoyed touching her, the way she would turn putty in his arms. He wanted to know if she felt it too. Harry swore he heard a small whimper when he leaned towards her in the last scene. It caught him off guard. When the director yelled 'cut' , they pulled away from each other. They might not have kissed, but the closeness made him feel something.
People were leaving after the shooting. After thanking everyone, Harry turned towards the door, only to see his wife standing there, talking to a crew member. He didn't expect she'd come to the shooting. Yes, he had told her over dinner that they would be shooting the video the next day but he never thought she would come. To be honest, he felt like they were drifting apart, they didn't have what they had once, they were falling out of love.
His eyes widened when he saw her there. How long has she been there? Did she saw the way he was touching Kara? Did she understand how he felt? He could feel his palms sweating.
Putting on his fakest smile, he walked over to her and slipped a hand around her waist,
"Hey Y/N/N, when did you get here?"
"I got here while you were filming, your mom took Beryl for the night. You did fantastic, H. I'm so proud of you", she smiled.
"Thanks baby. Shall we head out? "
"Um… yeah, sure"
"You go wait in the car, I'll be there, gotta get my phone and wallet from the other room", he said.
—-----------------------------------
It was the day before the premier. Harry had arranged a celebratory dinner for the crew. Y/N was also there.
After the dinner, they were about to leave. Y/N had gone to the washroom and was coming out into the hallway when she heard Kara call out to her husband.
"H, wait up…"
Harry turned around to see Kara running towards him.
"Were you leaving?"
"I… yeah, I was. My wife had gone to the washroom, I was waiting for her", he said. She should know that he was married; she should know what she was getting into, if she was interested in him. But of course, she would know, he was The Harry Styles.
"Um, yeah… I just wanted to let you know something. "
"Yeah? What is it?" , he asked frowning slightly.
"It's just that I'm going back to L.A the day after tomorrow."
"Oh" , he wasn't expecting that. His face fell.
"I'm going to come right out and say it Harry, I really like you and I feel like you like me too. Uh…would you come to my apartment, if I invite you? We could spend one night together before I go back."
Harry couldn't believe it, she liked him!
Without wasting another moment, he stuttered out,
"I … yeah, I'll come. We'll go after the premier".
Y/N couldn't believe what she heard. Her husband was in love with someone else. He was going to cheat on her. Her heart dropped to her stomach. She just wanted the earth to split in two and swallow her whole into the abyss. She walked downstairs, shoulders slumped in defeat. She walked away and waited by the car, expecting his arrival. She heard his footsteps not long after. Wiping off her tears, she tried to act normal.
—-----------------------------------------------
The day of the premier. Harry had woken up before everyone and was getting ready. The stylist had done his hair and makeup. He just had to change into his tux.
"Y/N, are you ready yet, baby?" He called out.
When there was no reply, he walked towards the bedroom and saw her in her PJs, eyes puffy and nose red.
"Baby, are you alright? What happened? Aren't you coming with me to the premier?" He asked.
"Um, no, I'm not. I don't feel good. I think I'm going to be sick. Can you go on without me today?" ,She lied, her voice hoarse.
Harry didn't think twice before agreeing. He was already nervous about how he was going to go to Kara's house with Y/N around. Now that she wasn't coming, it was easier for him to go to her place, but when he was about to leave for the venue, she felt bad about leaving Y/N in such a state. Was it fair to her, what he was doing? It's just a night, and Kara will be off to god- knows- where after that. It was his last chance. Harry walked towards the car with confident strides.
—--------------------------
After Harry slammed the front door shut, Y/N broke down. She couldn't take it anymore. Harry won't be home tonight. He'd be going to her house and he'd realise that all he wanted was Kara and leave them. Y/N decided that she would leave before he'd have to break the news to her - she didn't want to hear that from him, she didn't want what they had to end, but what choice did she have? He doesn't feel the same way anymore. What was the point of staying there? After tonight, he would never be hers. He was going to give Kara something that belonged only to them. After tonight, Y/N is nothing to him. With a heavy heart and tearful eyes, she started packing all her stuff.
By afternoon, she was able to pack everything. She told Beryl that they were going on a little trip. They had to leave before he came home. She didn't know where to go. She took out her phone and called the only person who came to her mind - her best friend Alice. She called an uber in the evening and loaded all their belongings into it. With sorrowful eyes, she looked over at their house one more time ; the house they bought together, the house she thought they'd grow old together in, the house they had built so many memories in. With trembling hands, she opened the door to the car, let Beryl and herself in.
—--------------------------------------
The event went well. Kara was not wasting any time, touching Harry any way she could. He didn't object or in any way try to get away from it. But he gradually started finding it a little uncomfortable.
The premier was over by 7o' clock in the evening. Everyone was going about their seperate ways and as the time passed, Harry became more and more fidgety and skittish. He saw Kara approaching and gave her a nervous smile.
"Um, I think we should go seperately you know, to not give the press anything to talk about." She said.
"Yeah, right. So erm… you will go now and I'll come to your place later?"
"Exactly. Plus…it will give me time to prepare ", she smirked, walking away.
—---------------------------------------
Harry's heart was racing. He stepped out of the car and walked towards the house. The yard was illuminated with lamps on either sides of the pavement. With each step, he was getting more and more anxious.
"This is it", he muttered to himself. The chilly air of the night made him shiver. He involuntarily put his hand inside his pants pocket. There was something there. He took it out, it was a folded piece of paper, sides crumpled. Curious, he gently opened it, inside it was a hand drawn picture. He realized that Beryl must have sneaked in that picture the day before. Three stick figures stood in front of a rose bush. The words "all the best, Daddy" was written in purple colour. He smiled at the memory - when he and Y/N took Beryl to the rose garden while they were visiting France. Beryl was so happy to see the butterflies she saw there. She had even made a new friend there. They explored the city and Beryl was so tired by the time they went back to the hotel room, which gave Harry some much needed intimate time with his wife.
He thought back to the time when Beryl was born. He was out of town for a meeting when Anne called him, saying that his wife had been admitted to the hospital. She was out with Anne and Gemma at the time. He got to the hospital as fast as he could. There she was, smiling like the angel she was, holding a small bundle of blankets in her hand. He rushed over to her and looked inside the bundle to see their little baby girl.
"Our little girl", he said, tearing up.
"Our little girl", she repeated. He leaned over and kissed her forehead. "Thank you for giving me the best gift in the world, I promise to love you both till the day I die."
Harry teared up at the memory. He had everything. Y/N gave him everything. What had gone wrong between them? Was she not enough for him? No, she was always more than enough, it was his own stupidity that led him to where he was now. Then realisation dawned upon him - he was searching for Y/N in Kara. The way she made him feel, the way she soothed him; but the truth was that he could never find it in Kara.
It was never Kara, it was Y/N , it was always her and it was high time he let her know that; he had been taking her for granted. Harry turned around and started walking towards his car with confident strides.
Wiping off his tears, he focused on the road. Kara had been blowing up his phone. He felt disgusted at himself for even considering cheating on his wife. And the worst part was that he had left her all alone, sick, to care for herself when he was so eager to have another woman under him. He felt pathetic.
—-------------------------------------------
He parked his car and ran towards the front door. The house was covered in darkness. Why didn't Y/N turn the lights on? Was she that sick? At that moment, Harry hated himself for leaving her in the bed.
He turned on the lights and called for Y/N. No reply. He walked towards the bedroom, only to find nothing but a pile of sheets. He checked every nook and corner of the house for them, but to no avail. Harry started panicking. What happened to his wife and child? Where were they? He checked his phone again. No calls or messages from her. He called her back, but all the calls went straight to voicemail. Walking back to his bedroom, he found something he didn't see when he first came in... her wedding ring? On top of a wrapped box? He realised that it was the very same gift he gave her to make up for their fight - it hadn't even been opened. On top of it was a letter.
He was confused. He gently opened the letter,
Dear Harry,
By the time you see this, we would be out of your hair. I know I have not been the best wife, and trust me I've been trying.
After you told me that we were a burden to you, I had been trying so hard not to be a burden; I used to stay late in the boutique, do everything for you so that you won't leave me; leave us. I had realised that you had fallen out of love with me, but I didn't want to be separated from you, I thought it wasn't fair to Beryl. I thought I could handle it. But I couldn't. I hated it when I saw you with Kara. I hate that you don't love me anymore and I hate myself for it. I had seen you that day at the cafe and had called you to let you know that I was there. But I didn't know that you were with someone else. I didn't say anything even after you came home, because I didn't want you to leave us. I selfishly held on to the hope that if I stopped bothering you for everything, maybe you'd stay with us. But that hope was shattered when I accidentally overheard you and Kara at the dinner. I couldn't stay here after that. I am taking Beryl with me. I know I don't have a place in your life anymore. It hurts like hell and I know that I would never be able to move on from you because I loved you; I still love you. I didn't want you to tell me that you don't want us here, so I left with Beryl this afternoon. Don't worry, we won't be a burden to you anymore. I don't want your money or fame or anything, I just have a request to you - even if you regret me, please don't regret Beryl, she would be heartbroken.
I would tell Beryl that you have gone back for tour; she'd be sad at first, but she'd get over it eventually.
We won't meet again, Harry. I'll stay out of your life for good. I really hope this was worth it.
Goodbye,
Y/N
Harry stood there with the letter in his hand, shocked. And when reality sunk in, he collapsed onto the floor, tears streaming down his face.
----------------------------------------
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spindrifters · 4 months
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In honor of impmas 2024, I present to you good godfather sirius black and the one and only time I will ever write harry, ft. some groupchat crack treated seriously. happy birthday, @impishtubist!
“Where have you been?”
Harry jumps, the uncanny impersonation of Molly Weasley reverberating through the dusty rafters and black lacquer front hall of Grimmauld Place. Sirius smirks, grabs the lanky fifteen year-old by the scruff and pulls him into an all-encompassing hug.
“Didn’t half scare me, Sirius,” Harry grumbles into his chest, and there’s the whisper of an attempt to pull away, but his heart isn’t really in it. In any case, Sirius doesn’t let him go, just buries a grin into that mess of hair. Lemongrass shampoo and London grime.
“Serves you right, sneaking off in the middle of the night.”
“I wasn’t sneaking.”
“No? What time d’you call this, then?”
“A perfectly appropriate time of night to go for a walk,” his godson continues to grouse. “Needed to clear my head.” Only it doesn’t escape his notice that there hasn’t been another attempt to pull away. And he’s not wrong. It’s barely half eleven, only Harry’s at double risk on his own these days. If not Death Eaters or another bloody dementor, then the press who’ll hound him to the ends of the earth should they catch sight of the Boy Who Lied—fucking cunts—alone on walkabout without so much as his friends for a buffer. There’s a reason the Order’s got about ten layers of protocol surrounding his protection at all times. If it were anyone else who’d caught him slipping in through the front door, there’d be hell to pay.
Harry’s not stupid, though. Far from it, Sirius thinks, that old pride swelling in his chest. And he’s got James’s cloak for good measure, clutched in a hand that smells of hot concrete and pigeon shit.
Harry seems to sag against his chest, Sirius’s hand still wrapped around his nape. Summer sweat of a teenage boy on the brink of becoming a man.
“Knut for your thoughts?”
“M’fine.”
Liar.
These are the things, then. The little tells beyond the way Harry strains toward him like a houseplant yearning for the sun. It’s not the same as sniffing out smells—daffodils and murtlap essence and the endless putrid fecal stench of Azkaban—but it’s just as strong. Pheromones or some muggle toss like that, something he might ask Hermione Granger about if he remembers before she heads back off to school.
It’s something Sirius noticed a long time ago, the change that happened in fifth year when his own heightened senses were lent keener by the dog that now lived inside. He remembers that Prongs was bright and coppery like triumph when he stepped off the Quidditch pitch, or cinnamon-fresh like home. He remembers being sixteen, frustrated and hormonal and knowing he’d die on the spot if anyone caught him with his nose buried in Moony’s discarded trousers to see if there was anything there that might even hint he wasn’t alone in this.
And Harry…
Something sour signaling frustration. Harsh metallic that means fear. Beneath that, the sweet damp scent of hurt. Sirius can hardly blame him. Fuck Peter Pettigrew, if he ever gets out of this fucking godforsaken house arrest, Merline Maitland and the rest of her staff at the Prophet are at the very top of his hit list.
“Go to bed,” he tells him, pressing a kiss to his sweaty brow, one that smells of rubbish bins lining the streets for the morning to come.
Green eyes flick up, half shock. “Thought I’d get it in the neck.”
“Nah,” says Sirius, guiding him up the stairs. “Just let me know next time. Maybe Snuffles can come along, too.”
“Yeah,” says Harry, though they both know he won’t. Sirius doesn’t need to sniff that out to know. He still thinks he has to protect Sirius just as much as Sirius knows it's not his job to do it.
He’s a good boy, Prongs. Too good. He doesn’t deserve any of this.
And.
You’d be so bloody proud.
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gurugirl · 9 months
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Let Me Show You
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Based on this request
best friend's dad!harry x reader | forbidden relationship
Summary: Your best friend's dad, Mr. Styles, is quite good at giving advice, amongst other things OR How your illicit affair with Mr. Styles began
Word Count: 6.3k
Warning: 18+ only, smut, cheating, age gap
best friend's dad!harry masterlist
Mr. Styles had a way about him that you admired. He was sure of himself and was good at just about everything he did. He was also really good at listening and giving advice. When you told him about how your boyfriend had hurt your feelings and how you were considering breaking up with him he told you that you could do better, that you deserved better.
And you knew he was right. He was always right. So when you broke up with Randy you didn’t once look back or regret it.
To Mr. Styles: I did it. Thank you for your advice, Mr. Styles.  
You texted Harry as you got into your car in the parking lot of the sandwich shop where you broke up with your boyfriend.
Fae would probably call you weird for texting her dad. She’d wonder what you were doing with his number in the first place.
But Harry insisted you text him after breaking up with Randy. He said he wanted to make sure you were okay and that you’d gone through with it. That he didn’t want to hear any excuses as to why you couldn’t do it. So he gave you his number and he took yours, telling you that if you didn’t reach out to him he’d be calling you himself.
From Mr. Styles: You’re welcome, Y/n. Where are you right now?
You started your car up just as he texted back.
To Mr. Styles: The parking lot at Dixie’s. I’m about to drive home.
You could see that he’d read the text right away and your heart skipped a beat when you saw the text bubbles indicating he was texting you back.
Fae would also hate that you had the biggest crush on her dad. The biggest. It was unhealthy actually, the kind of crush you had.
See, Mr. Styles wasn’t just someone you admired for his confidence and thoughtful advice. He was also gorgeous. His eyes were seafoam, crystal green. His lips were pink berry tinted. When he smiled he had dimples that carved into his cheeks. His jawline was chiseled and his dark hair was thick and wavy. He was tall with a fit body and broad shoulders, tattoos, big hands, a deep voice, and the most sex appeal you’d ever seen in one person.
From Mr. Styles: I’ll meet you at your apartment. I’m in the area anyway. I’d like to hear how the conversation went with your boyfriend.
From Mr. Styles: Ex-boyfriend.
You’d just broke up with Randy but you’d already forgotten all about him as you texted your best friend’s dad back with a large grin on your face.
To Mr. Styles: Okay. See you soon!
Your apartment complex was a little run down. It was in a safeish area but it was what you could afford with your wage as a waitress.
When you pulled into the parking lot you spotted Harry’s car immediately. His car stood out like a sore thumb amongst all the used, beat-up, and older models.
You quickly walked toward his Land Rover and watched him get out. You slowed your stroll to take him in.
That was another thing about him. He always looked so well put together. Harry was wearing dark blue slacks with a crisp white button-up shirt tucked in, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, a few buttons undone from the top down, leather loafers, and his hair was coifed on his head just so. Rings on his fingers, and his signature cross necklace, the pendant dangling right at the top center of his well-defined pecs. A gorgeous sight.
“Hello, darling,” he greeted you and pulled you in for an easy hug.
You hugged back and smiled as you pressed your cheek to his shoulder, he smelled nice.
Backing away from the hug you looked up at him, “Hi, Mr. Styles.”
He loved that you were so polite. So sweet. Yet he knew that you had a crush on him and that he loved the most.
You led him up to your apartment. This was the first time he would come inside. He’d picked up Fae a few times so he knew where you lived. But the idea that he’d be stepping into your little home made you feel nervous.
You kept your place tidy most of the time. You had pictures framed and hung everywhere. Some art pieces that you made yourself for fun. Your couch was cheap but it looked nice. Your rug was from Ikea and was a splurge.
But that wasn’t why you were nervous. It was because this man you’d lusted after for years was coming into your private space with you. Alone.
You weren’t dumb. You knew the implications. You understood on some level that Harry thought you were pretty. But of course, he was married. And he was your father’s age. So it was unlikely that this meant anything. But still. The fact that he was conveniently in the area and said he was coming over, knowing you wouldn’t say no… well it certainly wasn’t out of the question that something could happen.
Harry stood close behind you as you unlocked and opened your door, stepping in and allowing him space to enter behind you before you closed the door. Sunlight came through your windows and it was bright enough that you didn’t bother to flick on any extra lights out of habit. You didn’t like to turn on lights when you didn’t need to. Who wanted to pay a needlessly higher electricity bill?
You looked up at Harry as he scrutinized your space in silence for a few beats.
“S’nice, Y/n. Clean and uncluttered. I’m impressed.” He moved past you to look at your wall of framed photos.
You followed and stood next to him, “Well, what did you think? That I was a slob or something,” you chuckled as you looked at your photos.
Harry turned to look at you and the slight grin on his face gave way to a wider smile, “Okay, sassy girl. I was just giving you a compliment. No need to get mouthy.”
You laughed and looked down at your cuticles, not knowing how to respond exactly. He had you feeling a bit empty-headed in that moment.
But then you brought your gaze back up to his and remembered your manners, “Would you like something to drink, Mr. Styles? I’ve got water, strawberry soda, orange juice… uh… almond milk–“
“A glass of water will be perfect. Thank you.”
Harry watched you traipse to your kitchen quickly as he continued to look around as he sat down on your little couch and waited for you.
Harry wasn’t sure exactly why he was with you alone in your apartment. He knew he shouldn’t be there. He knew better than to entertain the kinds of dirty thoughts he often had about his daughter’s best friend. But, well, here he was. And you were adorable wearing your short cutoff jean shorts and white razorback tank top.
When you returned with two glasses of water you sat down next to Harry and nervously smiled.
“Thank you, darling,” Harry lifted the glass upward before bringing it to his lips and taking a big gulp. You followed suit and then placed the glass on your side table.
“Tell me about how it went. Did he try to change your mind?”
You swallowed and nodded, “It was hard. I hated doing it but also it felt really good. He promised me he could change and asked me to give him another chance. But I just remembered what you told me, about how I deserve better and I kept that in mind and stood my ground.”
Harry kept his eyes on you as you spoke and every bit of your body and skin that Harry’s irises landed on heated up from his gaze. You wiggled in your seat under his examination.
“Stood your ground. Good girl.”
You could have passed out. He’d never called you that before. And the way it sounded coming from his mouth had your throat going dry.
“You do deserve better, you know. You’re too good to waste your time on a boy like Rudy.”
“Randy.” You corrected.
“What’s that?” Harry raised his brows at you.
“Uh… his name is Randy. You said Rudy.”
Harry nodded slowly and looked down at your lips with a smirk before settling his gaze back onto your eyes, “Right. Randy. Definitely would be a shame to get his name wrong.”
You nervously laughed and shook your head, “Oh it’s okay! You know… I don’t care actually. Not important.”
Harry watched you squirm nervously as he licked his lips. As if he was readying himself for a meal. You did look mouthwatering. You pretty much always did. And he could admit that he’d like a taste at the very least.
“And what are your plans for the rest of the day?”
Shaking your head and shrugging your shoulders you looked down at your lap. His intense gaze was making you blurry and dumb. It was like listening to him speak another language and you had to translate the words in your head before you could understand and then respond.
“I’m… uh… was just gonna maybe call Fae. Go out later since I’m off tomorrow.”
Harry nodded, “And where would you go out to?”
You cleared your throat and kept your eyes down so you could breathe, “Thinking about that bar just up the street. We haven’t been yet and it’s so nearby–“
“I need you to look at me when you’re speaking to me.”
You’d never whipped your head upward so fast in your life. That was another thing about Mr. Styles. If he told you to do something you never hesitated. “Sorry, sir.”
He kept an easy grin on his face as he leaned his back into your couch cushions, crossing his ankle over his knee, and then moving his arm along the back of the couch, “No need to be sorry. Just want to see your pretty eyes when you’re talking is all.”
You could feel the warmth from his thigh radiating against your bare leg. You looked down to see how close he was sitting to you before quickly planting your gaze back on his.
He saw your glance downward and looked himself to note the proximity, “Am I sat too close to you?” You shook your head quickly, “No. That’s fine. The couch is small anyway. Can’t really help it.” You smiled and tried to chill out but the way he was dragging his irises over your skin and along the material of your shirt that stretched softly over your breasts before bringing them back up to look into your eyes had you sweating. And you hated that you’d begun to grow a little wet in your panties.
“Can I ask you a personal question? You don’t have to answer but I’m curious about something.”
You tried to focus your eyes on his and not look away as you swallowed and nodded, “Yes. Sure.”
He brought his arm across his body and touched the side of your neck, gently brushing the pads of his fingers against your pulse point causing you to inhale sharply, “This. Is this from Randy?”
You blinked your eyes and put your fingers on the spot he was touching and remembered that Randy had given you a hickey. When you first noticed that gave you a hickey it was quite large. You’d been covering it with makeup but now that it had mostly faded you didn’t think anyone would notice it.
You nodded, “Yeah. From a while ago. It was really big but now it’s mostly gone.”
“Did it feel good when he gave it to you?”
You dropped your mouth open in surprise. You hadn’t expected him to ask that. But you also didn’t want to not answer the man.
You smiled and dropped your hand down into your lap while Harry’s fingers remained on your neck, softly brushing at your sensitive skin, “It did. I hate it now because it’s from him, but… at the time… yeah.”
Mr. Styles nodded and you felt his thumb press over the spot before lowering down to the top of your clavicle.
“Did he always make you feel good?”
You were barely holding it together. Between the way he was touching your neck, and how intense his eyes were on you it felt like you were having an out-of-body experience.
“What do you mean?”
“You two had sex, correct? Or at least fooled around a bit?”
You began to pant as Harry’s finger wrapped gently along the side of your neck, his thumb at the front softly stroking your flesh. “Yeah. Um… not always. No.”
“Okay. Did he make you come?”
Your eyes fluttered shut for a moment as you sucked air into your lungs and felt his thigh press against yours.
Shaking your head you opened your eyes back up to look at him, “No. Never.”
Harry cocked his head and furrowed his brows, “Never? You’ve never made yourself come either?”
“Oh! I mean… yeah. I just mean that I never came with Randy. He wasn’t… didn’t listen.”
Nodding his head his furrowed brow softened, “Sounds about right. Has anyone ever made you come? Or just yourself?”
You knew he could feel the way your blood was pumping through your pulse point. Your heart was going wild in your chest as you watched Harry’s eyes darken, “Just by myself.”
“S’what I thought.” Suddenly Harry’s hand left your neck as he stood up from the couch. He put his hand out to you to grab, “Let’s do an experiment. But we’ll need to move this into your bedroom if you don’t mind.”
Harry pulled you up from the couch and kept his big palm wrapped around yours as he walked you to your bedroom.
Harry pointed to your bed as he looked at you. “Climb up, love. Don’t be shy.”
You let out a small nervous laugh through your nose as you sat on your bed and let your legs dangle off the edge. You watched as he got onto his knees in front of you and began untying your tennis shoes, taking each one off before pulling your socks off your feet.
He looked up at you softly as he put his hands on your knees, “Let me show you what it’s supposed to feel like. So next time some asshole says he doesn’t know how to get you off you’ll remember this and you’ll know the loser’s just too lazy to work for your pleasure,” he slid his hands up your thighs as you began to nod quickly. His warm hands gliding over your skin and to the fray of your jean shorts was more erotic than anything Randy had ever done with you.
“Is that okay? You want me to show you?”
You continued nodding as your breaths deepened. You could already feel your nipples tightening under your thin bra and you were positive Harry could see it.
“Is that a yes? I’d like to hear you say it to me. I appreciate the nod but your voice is too pretty not to use.”
“Yes, sir. Please.”
Harry grinned, “And I get a please too? So sweet for me.”
Harry sat up so his hips were against the side of your bed as he plucked your button from its spot and then unzipped slowly, “We’re gonna get these clothes off of you. I need access to all your bits. Understand?”
“Um… yes. Of course.” You pulled at the bottom hem of your shirt to pull it off but Harry grasped your wrists and tsk’d at you.
“Ah ah ah… Let me show you what’s it like to be treated as well as you deserve. We’re not in any hurry. Are we?”
Shaking your head you whispered, “No. Sorry.”
Harry pulled your hands to his mouth and kissed the inside of each of your wrists, “Don’t be sorry.”
Mr. Styles began to gently tug your shorts down your legs, leaving you in your yellow Sponge Bob panties. That was embarrassing. You hadn’t expected anyone to be seeing your panties and you’d totally forgotten which pair you threw on that morning until Harry smirked and inspected the cotton fabric stretched over your hips, “Cute. I like these,” he rubbed his thumbs over the edge of the fabric at your hips slowly before taking your tank top and pulling it up over your head as he stood up.
You were adorable. Little yellow cartoon panties and a white stretchy bra with a tiny pink ribbon at the center. Mismatched but practical he supposed. Didn’t matter anyway. They would soon be off.
Harry put his big hands on your hips and pushed you deeper into the bed, crawling with you. You propped yourself up by your elbows as he smoothed his hands up your tummy and to the underside of your breasts before bringing one hand down to your left thigh and pushing it outward just a bit. He turned his gaze to the fabric of your wet crotch. The yellow material was darker where your arousal had seeped out.
He licked his lips again and grunted as he thumbed along the elastic that clung to your inner thigh and he sucked in a sharp breath, “So wet already? Honestly, I didn’t expect this, Y/n. S’a very nice surprise for me. Do you get wet easily?”
You shook your head. Your lips were already parted as you began to respond, “No. Usually takes a bit.”
Harry grinned as he thumbed the wet patch on your panties and quickly found the spot where your clit was, “I consider this the highest form of a compliment. Like a little gift just for me.”
You let out a shaky breath as you watched him smooth his thumb over your panties and press into your button before bringing his digit to his mouth and sucking it into his mouth.
He had a devious smirk on his face when he pulled his thumb out and spoke, “No shower today?”
You gasped and tried to close your thighs together but he pushed your legs apart, his fingers digging into the soft inner part of your thighs. You put an arm up over your eyes to shield yourself from embarrassment.
It was true. You hadn’t showered that day. Not yet. You planned on going out to celebrate being single with Fae later on and you’d shower before that, but you hadn’t had the time yet. It’d been a little over 24 hours since you had.
“Don’t be embarrassed, Y/n. Your little pussy’s so fragrant so I just had to ask. Hate when it doesn’t smell or taste like pussy. It’s just another nice little surprise for me is all.”
You felt him pull your panties down your legs and you moved your arm to watch. You were mortified. You knew you were “fragrant” down there. Which was why you’d planned on showering before going out. But now you had your wet pussy bare and smelly before Harry Styles who pointed this fact out to you.
“I was going to shower before going out tonight…” you moaned when he dragged his thumb through your crease.
“You’re not going out tonight. You and I have work to do here. Don’t we?”
Your eyes were burning and your vision was fuzzy, which you knew to be from lust. You were so turned on that all your senses were being affected by him.
Nodding your head you spoke softly, “Yeah. Okay.”
Harry sat up and leaned over your frame his face coming in close to yours, “I forgot my manners completely. Got so caught up with you. Made me feel so needy that I nearly forgot we haven’t even kissed yet.”
You were just a melty little puddle of breaths and pumping blood under him as his lips pressed into yours. He tried to start off slowly. You could tell he was going in gently but you were shaky and out of your mind. You licked over his lips and grasped onto his collar to pull him into you and deepen the kiss.
Harry sputtered a laugh but was cut off when you licked your tongue into his mouth.
From there, Harry’s mouth pushed against yours hard and his lips and tongue guided your mouth. His fingers found your wet folds as he continued kissing you.
You gasped into his mouth when he slid two fingers inside of you. He hadn’t bothered to take his rings off and you could feel the metal against your soft skin as he pumped his long digits and in and out slowly.
When the bed was suddenly directly under your back, you realized he’d pushed you down flat as he parted from the kiss. He looked over your frame under him and his hands were sweeping over your bra before he kneaded gently, slowly pushing one hand underneath your back to unhook the clasp of your bra. You arched your back so he could reach it and the moment the metal hook was undone the stretchy fabric was pulled from your tits and Harry’s mouth was on you, sucking and lapping at your nipples
And then you heard him moan when he latched on particularly hard to one of your nipples and he placed his fingers back inside your cunt.
You could come. Just like that. His long fingers stretched and poked deep while his mouth worked over your tits softly before pulling your nipple harshly.
Sticking your fingers into his hair and closing your eyes you moaned loudly and began to writhe against his hand harder when you felt your orgasm close in. It was a shock how quickly it began to unwind but you were at Harry’s mercy and he was doing everything right.
Harry pushed himself up and smiled down at you with slick pink lips as he pulled his fingers from your cunt, “So sensitive too. How is it that you’ve never come with anyone, hmm? When you’re this reactive to me?” He circled his thumb over your clit teasingly and you bucked up into his hand and groaned just as he pulled it away.
Mr. Styles dipped in to kiss your lips again before moving down your body and hovering his face over your pussy as he looked up at you, “Do you want to come?”
You were already on edge, just about to tip into a new realm as you nodded hastily, “Yes, sir. I do.”
The smirk on his face was suddenly hidden as he lowered his lips to your clit and licked. The obnoxiously loud moan that fell from your lips had him laughing into your cunt as he lapped you up and reinserted his fingers.
His free hand held your opposite thigh down and the pressure that built up again was causing you to shake uncontrollably. You stuck your hands into his hair again and gasped at the way his lips worked your wet pussy, the way his fingers dug into you deeply and nudged into that yummy spot that you only ever got to enjoy with your vibrator.
“Ooh! My god! Mr. Styles! Mr. Styles…” You were powerless under him. The way he was sucking your clit into his mouth felt exquisite but at the same time, it was like your blood and guts were boiling hot and filling your limbs, searing your skin.
Harry hadn’t heard a woman squeal in a long time. He used to enjoy things like this with his wife but it had been a minute since she wanted to really play with him in the way he liked. All his skill and sex appeal were wasted all these years. But now he was getting to finally unleash his prowess on you. Such a delicate and sexy little thing. You deserved it. He imagined it more times than he should, doing the very thing he was at that moment, making you wobble and wet his face and shriek as you came.
He watched your soft tits shake and goosebumps cover your skin as he held you down and gently licked you as you came down from your release. It was incredible. So pretty to see you spread out and vulnerable for him.
When you finally opened your eyes Harry’s face was still between your legs. His cheek against your inner thigh as he looked up at you, “Better?”
You breathed out a laugh and nodded as you pushed yourself up to your elbows, “Yeah. Better.”
Harry sat back to his shins and you noticed right away the massive bulge pushing at the front of his pants. You reached your hand toward him and looked at the lump he was sporting, “Can I? Do you want…”
The grin on Harry’s face told you he knew what you were asking but he wasn’t going to let you off so easily. He wanted you to say what you wanted, “Can you… what?”
“You’re hard.”
“Tends to happen when I’m eating pussy,” he licked his lips with his eyes on you.
“Do you want me to… like… give you a blow job?”
“Hmm…” Harry squinted his eyes as he began to undo his pants slowly, “Maybe. Would you be against letting me fuck you?”
Your heart rate increased once again. Sex? With this man? You were nodding quickly before the words left your mouth, “Yeah. I mean… I’m not against it. I’d like that. I… I don’t have any condoms here–“
Harry pulled at your wrist and shushed you, “It’s okay. If you don’t want to that’s fine. But I’m clean. Haven’t been with anyone but Fae’s mom in a very long time.”
“Oh.” The reminder that Harry was married to your best friend’s mom made you step outside of the moment as you looked down toward where he’d opened his pants. His grey boxer briefs peeked out from under, his clear erection curving beneath the fabric. He looked so yummy and you’d love to feel him. But this was wrong, wasn’t it?
Harry noticed your hesitation and he pulled his pants up as he started to tug at his zipper but you were quickly reaching for his hand and looking up at him with those sweet eyes he couldn’t stop thinking about, “No! Please. I want you. I’m on birth control. So… And I always used a condom before so I’m good.”
Harry raised his brows at you in question, “Positive? You’re not just saying that to make me feel better are you? You want me to fuck you?”
“So much. Yes. Please.”
His lips smashed against yours when he pulled you into his chest. You could feel his heart pounding under his shirt. He was excited too.
When he’d gotten you laid back and spread out he pulled his pants and briefs off and removed his shirt. You were sure his nice clothes were going to wind up wrinkled with the way he tossed them into the floor but he didn’t seem to care.
And you’d seen his body before at the beach when you went swimming, and in his house when he walked around after working out and didn’t bother putting on a shirt… But you’d never seen his cock. And certainly not hard and leaking like it was.
His heavy shaft swayed as he positioned himself back in between your legs and he pushed the tops of his thighs to the back of yours. You couldn’t help it when you reached down to stroke him. He was thick and warm and the smooth, ridged skin felt delicious under your palm.
“Feels so good having your little hand on me like that, Y/n. Don’t think you know how many times I’ve imagined this very moment.”
You were still slick from everything before but you felt yourself clench and drip just imagining how good it would feel to have him stuffed inside of you. He was long too. So you knew it would reach into your cervix and make you ache in the way your vibrator did.
“I’ve imagined it too. I’ve wanted this for a long time, Mr. Styles.”
Harry keened and sucked at his teeth as he rocked his hips softly and began to slide the underside of his shaft through your folds. You kept your palm over the top of him as he moved up and down, slowly wetting himself with you. He kept his eyes on yours as he nudged his tip into your clit and then to your entrance, “You ready? You really want this?”
“Yes! Please!” Your chest was heaving in anticipation as you moved your hand from his shaft and held onto his forearms.
It was slow at first. He entered your tight muscle with a small snap and pulled back before pushing in deeper. You could see his muscles straining, his dark tattoos against his tan skin, his hair falling over his forehead, pink lips parted, nostrils flaring. He was enjoying your body. It felt good for him and you could see that.
“Holy fuck…” he grunted as he continued to bury himself deeper inside. He was already shaking like a teenage virgin. Your tight pussy wrapped around him, coated him, opened up for him slowly…
You choked out a garbled moan when he finally bottomed out. It was deep and you were right. Your cervix felt his tip kissing it with each thrust.
He began to roll his hips a little faster as he sat up and pulled your legs over his thighs, lifting your bottom off the mattress so he could fuck into you deeper yet and rub your clit to make you tip over the edge before he did. He knew he was going to come unbelievably fast. You were too pretty and felt too fucking good.
Harry’s hands stayed at your hips to keep you in place over his thighs as he plunged into your wet cunt over and over again.
“Hear that, Y/n? Hear how we sound together?”
You moaned a yes and gasped at how full he felt inside of you. It was noisy. You were absolutely soaked and the syrupy sound of his wide cock dipping into your drippy pussy, parting your walls was dirty. Soppy.
“How’s it feel, Y/n? Tell me what you need.” Harry’s words came out in panted breaths as rolled into you and released one of your hips to manipulate your clit with his fingers causing you to coo loudly.
“Oh! Mr. Styles! It’s so good. So deep, Fuck!”
Your bed creaked under you as he began to work into you even more and push into you deeper. You seemed to enjoy the way his dick poked into your cervix so he’d give you more of that.
“Yeah? I’m so deep in your tummy? Gonna give me your come? Let me feel you fall apart on my cock like this? Hmm?”
The view of his thick shaft, shiny and creamy with you as he plunged into your entrance, your lips gripping him tight as he pulled back and pushed in, was going to be something he’d be fucking his fist to for a long time to come.
“Yes! Please!” Your tits were swaying as he swiveled his cock into you painfully deep, hips pasted to yours, only pushing in deeper and deeper, balls tucked into your bum, slick with the way your arousal had melted down over him as he fucked into you.   
Harry gasped and clenched his teeth at the way you squeezed around him tightly.
When he finally pulled back to his tip you both caught your breaths. He was so close to coming and you were on the edge already. Just as he intended.
He gently thumbed at your clit and watched your face contort, small puffs of breath and whiney gasps falling from your lungs.
“Y/n. Can you look at me, sweet girl?”
You peeled your eyes opened and set your pupils onto his. You were already looking absolutely fucked out, in a total daze, and that made him smile.
“Where do you want me to come? Want to know beforehand so I’m not doing anything you’re not okay with. Because I’m gonna come very soon.”
You swallowed and blinked your bleary eyes. Harry’s chest was rising and falling heavily and his skin was flushed.
“Want your come inside of me. Is that okay?”
Harry breathed out a laugh of disbelief and nodded, “More than okay. S’perfect in fact. You’re gonna milk my cock good, aren’t you? Want me to fill your tummy with up nice and full?” Harry dipped in a few inches before backing out to the tip again and you whimpered.
“Yes. I want to be full with you.”
Harry closed his eyes and called on all his strength to not come that very second. Your soft rounded eyes looking at him in that way that told him you needed him while his cock was inside of you was nearly too much. He was obsessed. There was no way he wouldn’t want to do this with you again.
But the moment he had composed himself and gotten his second wind he looked back down at your pretty body lying under him and he began to move into you again, getting deeper and deeper until his pace had you being pushed upward at each thrust. Your tits bounced and your bed creaked. Harry's hips rocking into yours was harsh, his skin smacking into yours, wet slushy sounds.
His thumb circled over you tightly again and you moaned as you grasped his thighs bent under yours.
Your eyes began to flutter as your body lost all control of its motions. Your mouth dropped open and your face twisted up. Harry watched you contort your mouth and the little noises you were making egged him on to pound into you harder as his thumb worked your clit back and forth.
Everything was wet. Harry’s whole lap was drenched in you. You’d dripped down your thighs and over his balls on the tops of his thighs. It was the exact kind of sex he’d been missing for so long. Messy and smelly and hot.
You suddenly gasped and then went quiet as your orgasm began to take over. You clenched and pulsed over Harry with your mouth wide, your entire body trembling.
“Ooh fuck me… Fuck, Y/n… Oh shit…” It was too good. Too decadent. The way your cunt clamped down and spasmed around his heavy cock sent him over the edge.
And just like he said, your pussy milked him for everything he was worth. He pushed into you deeply, groaning your name between curses as his balls tightened and emptied into his long shaft and pushed out the tip, spurts of his warm come flooding your insides as he stilled his hips against yours snugly.
You could feel his cock throbbing inside of you as he moaned your name. You forced your eyes open to look at him. To watch as he orgasmed inside of you, his come claiming your body and ruining you for anyone else. His head was thrown back and he held your hips possessively as he emptied everything he had into you.
Your brain was fuzzy and your ears rang as he lowered himself down over you and brought his mouth against yours softly.
He was still pulsing the slightest as your mouths moved together lazily. You put your hands into his hair and sighed into the kiss. You hadn’t felt so content in a long time. Maybe ever. He truly did know how to do it right. He said he was going to show you what it was supposed to feel like and he did. Now settling for anything less just didn’t make sense.
When he pushed himself up to look down at you he had a haphazard smile on his face, “How was that?” He knew the answer.
You laughed and grinned, “The best. Better than my vibrator even.”
Harry breathed out a laugh and shook his head, “You gonna let me do that again sometime?”
“Thought you said you and I had work to do and that I can’t go out tonight?”
He furrowed his brow, “Yeah?”
“So, I kind of thought… we’d do that again. Like later. Since it sounded like you were gonna keep me busy all night. Or did you not mean that?”
Harry laughed and you got to see his gorgeous dimples before he pushed his nose against yours, “You want it again tonight? I wasn’t sure you’d be up for it. But we can certainly make a night of it. I do have to leave at like nine so no one wonders where I am.”
You turned your head to look at the clock and then back to Harry, your smile giddy and wide, “Good. I’ve got you for five more hours then.”
“Mmhmm…” he hummed against your mouth and kissed you before looking back down at you again. “But I meant beyond tonight too. I think we could have some fun together.”
You bit your lip. You couldn’t believe the kind of day you’d had. It started with dread when you woke up thinking about how you were going to break up with Randy. And now here you were with Mr. Styles’ cock stuffed inside your pussy, his come starting to leak out onto your comforter slowly as he asked to extend this little affair. How could you say no?
“Yeah. That sounds really good. I think we could have a lot of fun together too.”
Read next: Desperate
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harryxmarvel · 1 month
Text
Shatter my soul
Summary : Harry has been suffering from an addiction and y/n decides to take time for herself or based on this ask
Pairing: rockstarboyfried!Harry x reader!y/n
Warnings: Angst
A/n: this piece turned so much better than I hoped for.
My masterlist
When they decided to take time for themselves harry and y/n were in a rough spot with not only their 11 years long relationship but their entire life.
After being falsely accused and getting fired from her dream job, gave up any and all hope y/n had as she came home to her love only to find him passed out in the middle of the living room.
His cocaine addiction was getting out of hand so much that he almost died of overdose saved by y/n who decided to come home early for some reason.He swore to never touch that stuff again but there he was high off his mind as he mumbles incoherently lying on the floor a week later.
The next day after getting him sober y/n decided it was best for them to take a break to figure out themselves and their life as she can't stand by him hurting himself like that. Harry had his issues, stress eating him alive at every wake hour ,he decides it was better if he wasn't in his own mind. The cocaine he could easily get his hands on was just a massive perk for him.
It had been a month and half. Y/n got a job at a restaurant and works as a bartender at night. She moved back to her old appartment after their break up and had been doing well on her own. She missed harry a lot even though their good days were well past months she still loved him, still wanted to help him and show him that she was there for him no matter what. She just wished he was doing better too. After their first week of breakup harry had called her high as he mumbled how much he missed her and promised to be better she just hopes he kept his promise.
It was a month later when y/n was at her favourite arcade bar with her friends. The place was a little loud with drunk men drinking beers and shouting at the screens.
They were seated in a booth after a good round of beers and  fun. She was mindlessly talking with her friend klara when the bartender calls her name.
Y/n walks to the bar and the bartender points to the payphone at the corner of the room.
They still got payphones
Y/n thinks to herself as she brings the phone to her ears. The first thing she hears is a sob which sends her into alert. "Hello?" She questions and the person on the other line replies "Baby, it's me.." he sobs out making y/n quiet as he continues "I'm getting sober. It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do but I'd do anything for you baby. Just want you back, want to love on you like you deserve" he says breathing hard as y/n finds her words.
"I'm so happy to hear that H. That's what I wanted for you." Y/n says a smile breaking on her face as she tries to calm him down but he doesn't he keeps crying which makes y/n a little scared because it would've been really hard for him to be doing this alone.
Y/n should've struck by him, isn't that what their relationship should have meant. She feels incredibly guilty for walking away when things got worse but she did it wishing for the best and maybe it kinda did work out in the end and now all she wanted was to be with him and show him how much she appreciates him doing this for her.
"I'm gonna be there okay? I'm so proud of you baby" y/n says ready to hang up the phone but harry breaths out before she could "No, no i....you can't....I want you to but" y/n cuts him off in worry "what's going on H?"
"I wrote you a letter"he says and the other end is quiet as he continues.
"I wrote it so I could get everything out. I think?" He sounded so unsure his voice raspier than usual. " It should be in your apartment" he adds and y/n says she would read it and come by his place before hanging up the phone.
She bids goodbye to her friends after explaining them about the situation and then waving her off with a concerned look on their face as y/n walks back to her apartment. She goes through all her mail and finds the one harry had sent. Her name and address on the envelope.
She opens it and it had two sheets folded inside it. She didn't know what to expect as she reads through it.
My love,
             Today has been particularly hard without you by my side. My manager has been pressing me for the next album but how could I think about anything but you. It had been 8 weeks since I last heard your voice and I never knew how much it filled my life untill I couldn't hear it anymore and I think maybe that's what made me want to give up the drugs even if it feels like I'm drowning. I'd do it for you.
I still remember the tears in your eyes when you told me about you ex and how mad it made me. I wanted to bury him alive for hurting you like that. I never wanted to infect any kind of pain in you. I swore I never would when I saw the lack of trust in your eyes.
It killed me to see the smile on your face slowly fading away because of me. I wanted to hold you close and tell you I'd be back. We'll get all of the good times we had together back because that was what you deserved. But I couldn't save myself not for me but for you because you are everything i have left. The only person who stood by me through it all and maybe that's what made me realise I was nothing without when you left.
I was always honest with you even when I was out of my mind i tried to explain what I was feeling. I know you blamed yourself that you couldn't help me but this was my own battle and you were the warrior in the front ready to kill anyone even though you didn't have to. You were always there for me and I'm really sorry if I wasn't baby. Because
 You deserve better than that.
You deserve someone who would be there for you.
You deserve someone who would stay true to their promises.
You deserve someone who would stay good for you.
You deserve better than me.
You deserve every happiness in this world.
She is at the end of the page her soul shattered with each word when a knock on the door pulls her out. She has a few tears falling down her cheeks. She wips them off before opening the door to find her close friend klara.
"Hey , what ar-" y/n is cut off as klara bursts "I need to tell you something"
"Oh okay, come on in" y/n opens the door wider to let her in but klara shakes her head as she continues "No, I just need to tell you this....i" she's breathless and y/n patiently waits for her to continue.
"I slept with harry" she says after a few deafening seconds which stretches to minutes after the words are out.
"It was stupid and I was drunk and it just happened. We were both out of our minds and we didn't know what was happening. I'm really sorry y/n. I didn't mean for it to happen. I'm sorry"
Y/n is still as she listens to her ramble. All of y/n's friends hated harry something about him not treating her right while he was the total opposite.  She never knew why that was but to hear her bestfriend had slept with her boyfriend of years cut deep into her poor heart and the stabs just kept coming.
"It happened a few months ago and I couldn't stop myself from going back. I didn't mean for it to happen y/n you have to believe me" klara begs her eyes welled up with tears.
Y/n couldn't stop herself from thinking how much of a fool she was for thinking all those nail marks on his shoulder, love bites on his jaw and chest were from her when she knew it wasn't. The woman's perfumes he used to smell like made her realise it wasn't just Klara. And one thought kept haunting her mind as she stands on her doorway.
Had she really been that delusional ?
A/n: I think I just broke my own heart 😭. Who wants a part 2?
Read part 2 here
Check out my masterlist  if you are interested
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allwaswell16 · 17 days
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A fic rec of One Direction fics where one of the characters is very protective over another character as requested in these two asks. You can find my other fic recs here. Please leave kudos and comments for the writers! Happy reading!
- Louis/Harry -
⚔️ This Multiplicity of Powers by HelloAmHere / @helloamhere
(E, 149k, X-Men au) Maybe there’s a universe where he doesn’t have to keep all his secrets on the inside. But this isn’t that universe.
⚔️ forever is in your eyes by we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed
(M, 125k, supernatural elements) He wants love. He wants to be held and cherished and have a home. Not just a place to lay his head down at night. He wants to be loved the way that Louis had loved creating Harry. He wants his perfect man, but he wants him to be real. He wants Harry to be real-
⚔️ cut your teeth on my heart by @turnyourankle
(E, 94k, bodyguard Louis) Harry has spent years trying to distance himself from the pressure of the Twist name and legacy. But it's going to be hard to avoid when his mum hires him a bodyguard.
⚔️ And down the long and silent street by whimsicule
(M, 86k, historical) Wherein Louis and Harry are on the opposite ends of the social ladder, but their paths still cross on the filthy streets Louis calls his home. The odds are staked against them from the beginning, and even more when Louis' past finally catches up with him.
⚔️ What I Have With You (I don't want with anyone else) by @lululawrence
(NR, 73k, omegaverse) Louis is an asexual alpha, Harry is his aromantic alpha friend and possible roommate, and faking a relationship might be exactly what they need to get their families and friends off their backs.
⚔️ this charade (was never going to last) by @scrunchyharry
(E, 68k, spies) As if the whole ‘industrial spy’ business was not stressful enough, Harry found himself in a hatred-at-first-sight relationship with one of his new coworkers, Louis, a man intent on detesting Harry.
⚔️ your memory over me by @shimmeringevil
(E, 64k, exes) The worst heartbreak of Louis’ life walks right back into it when his parents invite their family friends on an all-expenses-paid trip for their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Facing a past that he tried to bury long ago, Louis learns that some people have a way of sticking with you even when they’re gone.
⚔️ and i would search the night sky to find you by devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain
(E, 56k, omegaverse) Harry Styles is a high class, well-bred Omega attending Bosworth Academy - a prestigious boarding school looking over the small town on Kinsey. When he attends a school trip into town though, he meets Louis Tomlinson - a blacksmith and mouthy Alpha who doesn't particularly care for the standards of high society nor for the people in it. 
⚔️ Close to Nowhere by @angelichl
(E, 34k, hate to love) Louis and Harry are psychics who kind of hate each other. They go to Tennessee to investigate a haunting.
⚔️ Until the Pearls Get Lost by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup
(M, 25k, omegaverse) Louis will spend the rest of his life in an institution unless Liam can find someone to take him in and care for him as he recovers. Most omegas with failed bonds are never the same again.
⚔️ Keep Me Closer by zanni_scaramouche / @zanniscaramouche
(T, 18k, omegaverse) Louis expects Harry to react poorly, maybe even file a formal complaint and that’s gonna suck ass but Louis won’t say shit cause he knows he deserves it, so he prepares an apology before Harry’s even turned around.
⚔️ Unraveled by @allwaswell16
(E, 18k, bodyguard) They had reason to believe that Prime Minister Louis Tomlinson might be in danger, and they’d like Harry to act as his personal protection.
⚔️ Meet Me On The Forest Floor by @taggiecb
(M, 15k, fallen angel) Louis is an angel, and one day he does something that causes him to fall from heaven, and into the arms of Harry Styles, forestry officer, who cares for him until Louis can get back on his feet again.
Your Touch Is The Only Thing I Feel by @2tiedships2
(M, 15k, omegaverse) the one where Louis refuses to settle for just any alpha despite intense touch deprivation. Fortunately Harry isn't just any alpha.
⚔️ Heart Eyes by Snowy38 / @snowy38
(E, 10k, blind Harry) Seventeen years old, friends since they were eight, and they’d never been pushed into the kissing cupboard together before.
⚔️ In Shining Armour of Trackie and Trainers by LadyAJ_13 / @ladyaj-13
(T, 9k, famous/not famous) Online dating isn't exactly working for Harry. In fact, it couldn't really be going much worse. But then the door of the bar opens, and the pack of friends walking in parts and - that’s Louis Tomlinson. Louis fucking Tomlinson.
⚔️ I’d Walk Through Fire For You (Just Let Me Adore You) by Neondiamond / @neondiamond
(E, 8k, omegaverse) Firefighter Louis is having an uneventful shift at the station when a call comes in about a devastating fire in a nearby apartment complex. All of his worst nightmares become reality when he realises it’s where Harry, his best friend who he’s had a relentless crush on for years, lives, and that said best friend is stuck inside among the flames.
⚔️ Just Hold On by SilverStuff50 / @silverstuff50
(M, 3k, famous/not famous) “It’s just not safe. You’re surrounded by people grabbing and pulling at you.” He looks Louis up and down appraisingly. “And you’re so-“ he stops himself when Joni shoots him a warning look.
⚔️ I Hope You Choke (on those words) by Imogenlee / @imogenleewriter
(E, 2k, bodyguard) Never in his career had he seen a musician as reckless when it came to personal safety as Louis Tomlinson.
- Rare Pairs -
⚔️ your crimes are quiet, my love by lightswoodmagic / @lightwoodsmagic
(E, 97k, Zayn/Liam) A darker Miss Congeniality AU that follows Zayn and Liam, MI5 agents, partners since training and best friends, as they race to stop a serial killer. 
⚔️ Can You Feel Where the Wind Is by FallingLikeThis / @fallinglikethis
(M, 3k, Zayn/Liam) Liam still remembers the argument, still remembers the feelings of stubborn exasperation and eventual grudging acceptance, when his father had insisted that Liam needed a security detail while out doing his father’s bidding.
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