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penny00dreadful · 6 months

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1st July 2015

Big brown eyes and soft plush lips were still plaguing his mind and it had been months.

He’d met Eddie once, exactly once, shoving him into an alleyway and he hadn’t seen him since.

Why the fuck was he still thinking about him?

Steve didn’t go out looking for him, he didn’t.

He may have taken some lower end work dealing with some small-time drug ‘lords’ who owned a particular apartment building or a stretch of street and maybe he was hoping he’d come across Eddie during one of these missions, sweep him away and get him out of whatever mess he was in.

Couldn’t be that hard, right?

But Eddie seemed to have dropped off the face of the earth.

Granted he’d never seen the guy around before so it wasn’t exactly unusual that he hadn’t seen him since.

Maybe it had been just a ‘two ships passing in the night’ thing.

Maybe they’d find each other again when they were ninety and just about to drop dead from old age.

And maybe it was just supremely creepy that Steve couldn’t stop thinking of one guy he’d met one time, going so far as to try and seek him out, hoping they’d see each other again just so he could pull him into the super dangerous world of spycraft and probably get him killed along the way.

What on earth was going on in his head?

“Dingus? Earth to dingus?”

Ah.

That’s what was going on in his head.

“Yes, Birdie?” Steve flipped the cold compress over, pressing it back down to his eye and sinking deeper into his couch, sighing into the empty apartment.

“Just checking you’re alive is all.”

“Well my vitals are right there in front of your screen so that should answer your question. It’s just a black eye, not a concussion. I’m not going to die from a black eye.”

“If anyone would, it would be you.”

“I’ve survived much worse than a black eye-”

“Yeah, I know-”

“I’ve been tortured, Birdie.” Steve squeaked, trying to sound as pathetically upset as possible.

“I know. I was there. In your head the whole time.”

“Well now you’re just making me sound crazy.”

“And back then, like today, your fucking mic was on and you wouldn’t stop snarking-”

Steve dropped his mouth open in outrage. “I wasn’t snarking, I was quipping-”

“They were some pretty weak fucking quips, babe.”

“Okay, well why don’t you try being smart while you’re facing down three goons with sharp objects. I doubt you’d be able to come up with something good that quick.”

“Is that really what you want Steven? You really want me out there? In the field? With a gun?”

Oh god, wouldn’t that just be a sight to behold. Robin was as smooth as a newborn giraffe, she’d be more of a danger to herself than any target she was given.

And Steve would sooner die than see her in danger like that.

“You’re right. You’d probably shoot your own nose off by accident.”

“Yeah.” He could hear Robin’s pout. “I like my nose.”

“I like your nose too.”

She laughed. “You’re such a weirdo.”

“Your weirdo.” He nodded.

“Yeah, my weirdo.” He heard her take a breath before asking, “Do you think you’ll be in tomorrow? Hopper wants a meeting.”

“Hooray.” Steve said with a sarcastic smile, even though no one could see him. “What does he want?”

“Gee, I don’t know Steven.” Robin answered back with the most peppy curiosity that made Steve roll his eyes. “It’s so strange that Hopper would call a meeting with you to discuss something in particular and not tell me what it was. Because then I could pass the information on to you and we could discuss it, therefore negating the meeting altogether-”

“Alright, alright, alright. I get it, Birdie. I’ll be in. Honestly I’ve been itching for something a little more hardcore lately. A little like the old days. I’m sick of fucking drug dealers and small time loan sharks. I want something a little more exciting.”

And Eddie was in the wind.

But he didn’t say that. He’d been keeping his… minor obsession to himself, reasoning he’d bring it up whenever he found him again and brought him into the fold.

But that hadn’t happened so, no Eddie-talk.

Robin didn’t even know his name.

“Be careful what you wish for babe. ‘A little more exciting’ could get you killed.”

2nd July 2015

Those words were playing on repeat in Steve’s head the next morning as he stepped into Hopper’s office.

“Have a seat, kid.” The head of The Agency was chewing on a cigar, like he almost always was.

When Steve had started with The Agency at eighteen years of age and fresh out of high school, Hopper’s casual (albeit gruff) warmth had unnerved him.

He’d spent the first couple of years high strung and tense, waiting for the other shoe to drop and for Hopper to finally snap after luring Steve into a false sense of security.

And Hopper had snapped, but not in the way his parents would have. He’d complain and shout and grumble but there was never a threat behind it, never any danger. And over the last nine years working with him, Steve had come to learn that not every older man in authority was his father.

Hopper always kept a dish of butterscotch candies on his desk and Steve reached for one when he sat down.

The younger agents, Dustin, Lucas, Will, Mike, Max and even Robin all made fun of him for it. They called them grandma’s candies but Steve didn’t care.

He liked them and if that made him a grandma then he’d be a grandma.

Hopper watched him through the cigar smoke, elbows on his expensive walnut desk.

“You’re my top agent, Steve.”

“Yup.”

There was no use denying it. He was. He had the highest successful completion rate, his hand to hand was unparalleled and choosing Robin as his guy in the chair had been a stroke of pure fucking genius.

No amount of training with someone else would be able to replicate what they had together.

“You remember when I sent you to infiltrate Brenner’s syndicate?”

Steve scrunched up his nose. “How could I forget?”

It had been his highest profile mission.

He’d nearly died.

Tortured and then chewed up by Brenner’s hungry dogs when escaping from the compound after he had sent the kids ahead to escape with El.

It had been the kids first mission together since Steve had recruited them all.

Dustin, Lucas, Will and Mike had all come from the same town and had initially been put under Steve’s protection when they had seen something they weren’t supposed to see, leading to a bounty on their heads from Walsh and Dante.

They had eventually pestered Steve into sponsoring them for positions at The Agency.

Max had come along later, spying on her brother's gang for them before she was safely extracted. Steve had never met her brother but he had been the one to bring Max in, sponsoring her as well.

El was their newest. Not an agent and it probably would be a long time before she was mentally ready for that, but the kids clicked with her anyway.

The kids had managed to smuggle her out after she had appeared to have been killed and she was still in hiding, presumed dead.

Steve had been ushering them out when the dogs descended, running in the opposite direction to the kids in order to lead the rabid animals away.

Once he’d had a solid pound of flesh taken from him (probably) and had escaped the attack, he’d then been forced to walk for miles through dense woodland before he could contact The Agency for extraction.

He had some pretty gnarly scars to prove it.

But the memory of personally putting a bullet through Brenner’s head a year later was just as satisfying as the rest was nauseating.

Hopper nodded. “Well, I have something similar that needs taking care of. And I need the best.”

“More human trafficking?”

“Not exactly.” Hopper leaned back in his chair, the leather fabric creaking as he moved and laced his hands over his belly. “You’ve heard of Henry Creels’s… operation?”

Steve swallowed.

Fuck.

Be careful what you wish for babe. ‘A little more exciting’ could get you killed.

Robin was never going to let him live this down.

Steve ran a hand through his hair. “Yeah. Global crime organisation. Practically owns the black market trade of fine and historical art and artefacts in Europe. He has a chokehold over the police forces in multiple countries, unknown how many or how far. Has an extensive underground trade in black market alcohol, drugs, firearms, blood diamonds and trades information to various governments globally. Not to mention some of the most dangerous people in the world work for him.”

That fucking made up boogeyman assassin, whatever his stupid codename was.

“That’s the one. We’re sending you in. Solo. Just observation to start.” Hopper held his hand up as Steve started to speak.

Steve hated observation.

He hated being camped out in dark corners or on rooftops or wherever else he could hide away. He much preferred to be in the action.

“We can’t afford to do anything by halves here, this could be the biggest job in the history of The Agency. Observation then infiltration. Do you understand me?”

Steve scowled, not even bothering to try and hide his irritation from his boss.

He would be able to see it anyway and besides, they knew each other too well for that.

Hopper knew he could do this. If there was another agent out there that could do what Steve did, they’d probably be sent on observation and Steve could just deal with the infiltration, but as it was, this was the biggest job anyone had ever been assigned to go on solo so he understood.

“Yes sir.”

Hopper nodded. "Good."

Steve got up to leave and just as he was nearly out the door, Hopper called after him, "And don't make me remind you and Buckley again to stop using the communicators when you don't need to. I will send another office wide memo if I have to."

5th July 2015

Steve regretted agreeing to this fucking mission almost as soon as he got to the warehouse.

Observation meant he was starting from the bottom rungs of the organisation and working his way up, which meant that today he was stuck overseeing fucking weed production like some god damned newbie cop.

What was even worse was that there were very few places to observe the activities inside, so he was stuck on the fucking roof, thirty feet up, freezing his fucking balls off, hoping something fucking interesting happened soon.

And again, the memory of Robin’s words pinged in his head.

Be careful what you wish for, babe.

Because unfortunately, something fucking interesting was exactly what happened.

The door of the warehouse below creaked open and a figure stepped through.

A figure, even from a distance, Steve recognised through the windows he was huddled next to on the roof.

Steve had hoped to see him again, but not here.

Not like this.

Eddie stumbled into the warehouse, bouncing down the aisles of growing cannabis plants, weaving in between other workers, nodding his head along to whatever was playing on his headphones and apparently oblivious to the energy in the room as he took his place picking and drying.

The second he had appeared, Steve could feel the atmosphere shift from all the way up on the roof.

Everyone had become almost unbearably tense, locking up at the sight of him, hunching their shoulders as he approached and doing everything in their power not to look at him.

Like these big hulking, bald and tattooed men were worried that if they were caught looking at him, they’d be killed.

What the fuck was going on?

What could make them so worried to be even caught associating with him?

Had he done something?

What the fuck could he possibly have done?

The guy was a fucking teddy bear.

Apparently Steve was getting answers tonight because the second he had the thought, a stern voice boomed from a prefab office at the top of a flight of stairs, positioned to look over the workers like some kind of overseer's office.

“Edward!”

Everyone there flinched at the sound, except for Eddie who still had his fucking headphones on.

He continued to work, nodding his head and probably humming too and Jesus Christ, pay attention!

Steve was about two seconds away from throwing something at the back of his head to get the idiot to look up.

Luckily Eddie seemed to have caught on, glancing up and then around at everyone else when he noticed how tense it was.

He pulled his headphones down then slowly turned towards the office, tension and apprehension visible through his shoulders.

The voice had come from a large, imposing man in a clean cut navy suit with a shock of stark white buzzed hair and a frown on his face.

Steve could tell just from the way the guy held himself that the man had past military experience, he was in good shape and he knew how to handle himself in a fight.

Probably kept a gun on him too.

“Shit.” Steve muttered to himself as Eddie nervously wiped his hands off on his top and began to slowly weave his way through the aisles and towards the office, as though a leisurely pace could delay whatever was about to come. “Shitshitshitshit.”

Eddie could run.

Why hadn’t he run?

The overseer had already retreated back into his office and Steve couldn’t see any guards standing around, keeping an eye on the exits.

Would one of the other workers tackle him to the ground if he did run?

Probably not considering they were still desperately avoiding his eyes. All these guys who probably enjoyed toxic masculinity as a side hobby were purposefully not looking at a long haired and skinny metalhead like if they did, some kind of monster would slink out of the walls and attack them.

So no, no one there would try to stop him if he did run.

Maybe Eddie was scared of what might happen to him after, if he did run?

What did they have on him to make him so scared? So compliant?

For the tiny amount of time that Steve had spoken to Eddie, he got the distinct impression that Eddie wouldn’t bend for anyone.

So what could they possibly be holding over his head?

God damn it.

It was against protocol. It was inadvisable. It was plain fucking stupid to get involved but Steve couldn’t just hang back and watch, could he?

Like yeah, even if Steve didn’t think Eddie was stupid hot, he’d never been good at sitting back and letting things happen when he could do something about it.

So he wasn’t going to just hang around while Eddie got shot, or got his fingers broken or a tooth ripped out or something else as equally fucked up.

What the hell had he even done to warrant that kind of tension?

Not moving enough product? Stealing some product? Sleeping with the overseer’s daughter or his son or something else equally as stupid?

Christ.

If this went downhill there would be so much paperwork involved.

He mirrored Eddie’s position from the roof, walking with him across the warehouse space, stepping over weak bits of corroded metal roof slabs and around various bits of debris until he was directly above the office, crouched down by an open skylight window with a birds eye view into the sparsely decorated room.

The carpet below was some mottled mix of worn down pink or stained black depending on where Steve looked, it had to have been red at some point before.

There was a large desk facing the door, faux oak veneer with a cheap computer setup, casting a glow onto the standard office chair.

No trinkets, no personalisation.

Eddie closed the door behind him with wide worried eyes, twisting his rings around his fingers.

The boss, for as stern and imposing as he was, he looked unusually hesitant.

His shoulders were as tense as a bow string and Steve could see a light sheen of sweat along his brow and the usual stress points.

The skylight Steve was crouched over was in the middle of the room, so Eddie and the boss were facing each other on either side of it.

Steve wouldn’t be able to make an entrance without dropping down in between their staring match.

Why didn’t he bring any of his kit with him?

Because it was only supposed to be fucking observation.

Then Eddie had to wander back into his life and now he’d probably have to choke this giant fucker out before anything went too far.

If only he had like… a fucking sleep dart on him or something. Maybe then he’d be able to drag Eddie up and away like Spider-Man, but with really good hair.

“You’re a real fuckin’ piece of work, you know that?” The boss snapped, clenching his fist.

Eddie didn’t really react beyond an eyebrow twitch, his hands dropping from his rings to cross his arms over his chest and a slight back and forth rocking motion on his heels.

The boss reached for something under his jacket, pausing for just a second before heaving in a shaky breath and pulling a gun out.

Eddie seemed to finally understand the gravity of the situation, taking a few steps back as the boss advanced, pointing the gun at him with a shaking hand.

This man had military experience, Steve was sure of it. So why was he so nervous holding a weapon he should know like the back of his own hand?

Eddie uncrossed his arms, bumping his back against the door he had come through just a moment before. “Woah, man-”

“Shut it.”

Fuck, okay.

Whatever about the weirdness, he had to move and he had to move now before Eddie got his pretty head blown wide open.

The boss had stepped forward directly underneath the open window which gave Steve the perfect opportunity.

Without thinking twice about it, he swung down from the window ledge, landing smoothly right behind the boss before latching his arm around his neck and pulling tight.

The boss dropped the gun in shock and Eddie surprisingly darted forward to catch it before it could hit the ground.

Steve was hanging on for dear life, the boss easily outweighing him but he’d taken down bigger targets than this. Literally and metaphorically. After all, this guy was only some small-time drug overseer, just one small cherry in one small slice that was the giant pie of Creel’s criminal enterprises.

Eddie had scrambled backwards, out of the way of all of the flailing limbs, crowding himself into a corner and slowly sliding down, staring wide eyed and disbelieving at Steve as he hit a particular nerve in the boss’s neck, causing his body to seize up before going limp. He dropped from Steve’s grip with a loud thud, crumpling to the floor.

Steve brushed himself off, straightening out his clothes before turning his eyes back to Eddie.

Eddie who was staring at him in complete disbelief. “What the fuck is happening right now?”

“Come on.” Steve stepped forward, holding a hand out for him to take but at second glance, looking at the way he was holding the gun he had grabbed, flat in his hand like it was going to fucking explode the second he looked at it wrong, Steve decided to reach for that instead.

Eddie watched him with all seeing, staring eyes as he picked the gun up.

Steve frowned.

It was very light.

Too light.

It wasn’t even loaded.

Why would the boss be threatening Eddie with an unloaded gun?

Did he not trust himself to not pull the trigger too soon?

Was it just a scare tactic?

“You’re-” Eddie stuttered with a slightly hysterical laugh. “You’re just full of surprises, aren’t you sweetheart?”

“Didn’t I tell you to get out of the game, baby?” Steve gripped Eddie’s hand in his, pulling him to his feet, maybe a little closer than they needed to be.

Eddie squeezed once, giving a little sad shake of the head. “And didn’t I tell you it’s not that easy?”

“Not if I have any say in it.” Steve grumbled. “We don’t have much time. Someone will have definitely heard that, so we need to go. Now.”

Eddie glanced up towards the skylight and then back to Steve.

“You don’t expect me to climb through that,” he asked, pointing, “do you?”

“Would you rather stay here and face whatever’s coming?”

Eddie’s eyes flicked between the skylight, Steve, and the door just behind him before going back up to the skylight again.

“Fuck my life.” He sighed.

Steve was ready to pull, ready to drag and lift and carry Eddie away from this place if given half a chance.

But he wasn’t given half a chance.

The door behind him was kicked open with such force it bounced off the wall.

He didn’t even have a second to turn, barely had time to blink between the door being kicked open and something hard and heavy cracking him over the back of the head.

He could feel Eddie’s hand fall from his as he slumped to the floor, he could feel the communicator on his ear begin to fizzle before it popped, singing his flesh and his hair, but safely destroyed.

Self-destructing like it was designed to do, so no one could get their hands on the technology.

The unloaded gun that was in his hand thumped to the ground next to him.

The carpet below him was sticky.

It was probably getting in his hair.

All the colours around him were swirling.

Above, there was some kind of scuffle happening. Shouts of anger and indignation, frantic apologies and attempts to placate someone.

“What the fuck did you just do?!”

That sounded like Eddie’s voice.

But he didn’t sound scared.

He didn’t sound hysterical.

He sounded outraged.

Steve could still make out some figures through the shadows filling in the edges of his vision.

Eddie was standing over him, fists clenched and furious.

He was facing another guy, who looked scared, a twist in his face like he’s just sucked on a lemon.

He was holding a baseball bat.

A fucking baseball bat.

Oh, the fucking irony of him being taken down by one of those.

The last thing Steve heard before he finally lost consciousness was a third voice grumbling in Eddie’s direction.

“Thought the boss told you to stop playing with your food.”

Divider by firefly-graphics

Part 1 Part 3 AO3

@geekymagicalpotato

Big thanks as always to @hbyrde36 for the magnificent beta work and to the STWG for their motivation

#steddie #stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #steve x eddie #eddie x steve #penny00dreadful #steddie fanfic #steddie fic #fanfic #pennys anniversary event #spies au #spy steve harrington #tw guns #tw murder #robin buckley #guy in the chair robin #cat and mouse spy fic

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elenajones23 · 2 months

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I'm confused. I don't understand how one minute, you say you ship Forwood and have Forwood content on your blog. But then most of your other posts about Caroline are bashing her and saying how she's useless, irrelevant, and annoying. Basically implying that as a person on her own and outside of her relationship, she isn't worthy and has no purpose or agency of her, and is only capable of being interesting and likable based on the guy she's with.

You're not required to like Caroline, but it doesn't take liking her to see how harmful and problematic this kind of mentality is. I don't know what's gotten into fans recently, that they suddenly have it out for Caroline, but the things I've seen being said about her lately are just not acceptable. She may not have been a perfect person, but regardless of what she did, that's no excuse for people to dog her out the way they have. I mean, you're acting as if Caroline is the devil incarnate or some kind of terrorist or something. And just because she was my favorite, doesn't mean I approved or agreed with everything she did. But unlike you and most fans, I know how to give constructive criticism and hold people accountable without having to dogpile on that person.

And as for Elena, I did like her in seasons 1-3, but seasons 4 and onwards? I'm sorry, but she was just vile and horrible. I will never stand by and defend or make excuses for someone who knew for a fact that her boyfriend raped and abused her best friend, and still chose to be with him anyway and just didn't care. Whether you like Caroline or not, regardless of you thought she was useless and all that, that doesn't change the fact that at the end of the day, Damon did rape her and abuse her in season one. It doesn't make what he did null and void. Unless you're one of those who's in denial and refuses to accept that Damon is a rapist and abuser. Or who victim blames/shames Caroline for that and says she deserved it. Which in that case, you've got bigger issues and are just as bad as all the rest of them.

Why don't you keep that same energy and aim that vitriol at characters who actually deserve it, and have done shit far worse and more abhorrent than Caroline? Like the majority of the men on the show? But I seem to have forgotten that men can do vile shit time and time again and still get defended. While if a woman makes even one mistake, she'll be burned at the stake over it for the rest of her life.

I “like” Caroline with Tyler because she’s forced upon me but when she’s with Tyler, she’s contained into that relationship and I don’t have to deal with her crap & her drama. So I liked them in sense it gives me a break from Caroline. She doesn’t have to shoved everywhere.

Tyler makes her bearable. I “ship” them in the sense of Caroline must be with someone because she’s there then I would prefer her to be with Tyler rather than anyone else on the show, I would “ship” her with Matt as well because it’s literally the same.

I never defend Damon or reblog any posts defending that rapist, it’s honestly disgusting that they actually made him & Caroline “close friends” or whatever bullshit is that. He has shown NO remorse or guilt for what he did to Caroline, or Bonnie or Stefan for that matter.

I’m disgusted that I was hardcore Delena shipper & Damon defender (never about what he did to Caroline, as a Delena shipper I just conveniently forgot what he did, no seriously I did)

Damon is an ACTUAL CREEP, hanging out with teenagers looking his age a man in his 30’s paining over a teenager he hardly knows/understands, where his whole life purpose is to just obsess with her 24/7.

It’s honestly pathetic, creepy and weak. What he couldn’t find someone closer to his age, a woman in her 20’s-30’s?

He has to go after his brother girlfriend? Why it does NOT add or make any sense and Elena is NOT at all the right fit for him in any shape or form, even if he wasn’t a rapist, creepy stalker he does NOT like WHO she is, he does NOT care about the things & people that matter to her, he mocks it, he belittles it and he literally thinks he “knows her better” because Elena has a fun side to her. He does NOT actually know her NOR UNDERSTANDS NOR love her, he loves the “nicer” version of Katherine (the only woman he actually truly loved with all her evilness) which is what Elena is to him, nothing more nothing less, Damon 100% PROJECTS Katherine into Elena but this version is actually nice to him but that’s about it.

The fact in his delusion after yeh werewolf but in 2x22 he “sees” Katherine and NOT Elena (even as Delena shipper back then I found that to very odd, because he supposedly spent the whole season hating Katherine & loving Elena yet he sees Katherine) just proves that he never actually stopped loving Katherine, she just hurt too many times and he has pride, had Katherine truly offered to be with him at any given time a real offer, I 100% know he would have taken her upon that offer and they would been the villains of the show for years (oh wait even though they weren’t together, they kind of were)

Damon is literally the male version of Katherine, the only difference Damon being a handsome “charming” MAN he was EXCUSED for all of his actions, he was DEFENDED endlessly Inter expense of other characters and freaking storylines.

The Damon the whole fandom seems to love oh so much is literally a made up Damon in their heads, I know this through my own personal experience and from how the still Delena stand defend him, this “sad little boy who was never loved hence he did all these awful things” he just needs the “love of a good woman” is what they want to believe him to be, it’s NOT who he truly is.

The reality is that Damon is pathetic, creepy, disgusting stalker/rapist and if Damon wasn’t played by such an attractive actor and played by an average looking guy who they (the make up artists)?also make him ugly with the right makeup, people would see the REAL Damon for exactly who is.

The reason you don’t like Elena S4-S6 is because that’s NOT the real Elena, the real Elena “died” when she became a vampire, her moments with Stefan before she broke up with him, that’s also the REAL Elena FIGHTING very hard to stay herself.

The Elena that’s with Damon is vampire sired Elena, and there was never an actual logical or real explanation or any kind of REAL evidence that her sire bond to Damon was ever actually broken.

The fact that she didn’t take the cure shows that NOT the real Elena, that she STILL did whatever Damon wanted (which for her to never to take the cure). Throughout S4 all she ever wanted to become human again and I would think that after her brother died to make sure they find it, that she would actually take it, if nothing else, she would take it for Jeremy’s sake so that his death actually means something.

Now onto your issue with me not liking Caroline, I literally NEVER ever liked her, not for one real minute, sure she had her moments here & there as vampire but I NEVER liked, she’s annoying af, selfish, shallow, stupid, self created and just right down BORING and stereotypical. She’s just an empty pretty vase/vessel for the writers to fill with whatever bullshit story they come up with.

I have actually tried to like her, believe it or not but I literally COULDN’T, just truly can NOT like her at all, she’s too blah as a person to me ever like or relate to in any shape or form.

Her fans/stans also just made it much worse, I didn’t like her but I have grown to hate her over the years because fans/stans such as yourself, who just can’t accept that there are people out there who hate/dislike their “precious” Caroline and nitpick onto other characters or much worse bully & give life threatening messages just because people actually “dared” to HATE their “precious” favorite Caroline, this “angelic Karen, Barbie vampire” who can do NO wrong at all, and everyone “must” be crazy about her.

Now as I have already explained everything to you, even as someone who hates/can’t stand Caroline, carline has never loved anyone to else as much as she loved Tyler, whoever ships Caroline with Klaus clearly does NOT love Caroline because she has made so very extremely and very annoyingly clear she is NOT interested in Klaus.

So if you shop Caroline & Klaus, you are shipping two people who do NOT actually exist (just like Delena or Hayley & Elijah) they are NOT their TRUE/REAL selves when these couples are shipped, simply projection of what people think these characters are.

I hope i answered everything and that next time you don’t just assume things about a person then hide behind “ anonymous” to feel as if you are a better person or whatever.

#anti caroline forbes #anti klaroline #anti tvd #tvd universe #tvd

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trashcanfills · 11 months

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Genshin Impact x Reader - Being an absolute Genius Invocation TCG nerd

Feat. Itto, Cyno (of course), and Kaeya because those are the ones I know who are into the game. Can be seen as mostly platonic but I added a bit of optional romance headcanons at the end for each character. Reader here is gender-neutral.

Ok so I’m getting some brain worms today in the form of the genius invocation tcg event like bruh

As someone who loves the card game and gets REALLY into it, can you imagine a reader agt the genshin cast while playing? Reader who’s such a dedicated player that they know the strats, the meta, and different deck playstyles. Reader who goes to the Cat’s Tail to hang out with fellow players and duels them on the daily enough that they have a reputation for being a pro.

It would be even more hilarious if they don’t exactly advertise this hobby (cough obsession) at all to anyone else outside the game, but the moment someone engages them in a duel or they go into places like the Cat’s Tail where many other players gather, or they attend any tcg related event? They go hardcore mode.

Itto sees you buying the latest tcg cards and he saunters up to you, bragging about how good he is at the game in an attempt to impress you lmao. Your curiosity is piqued and thus decide to challenge Itto for the funsies. At that, the oni is all “ho ho ho sure but don’t get too upset when I win, alright?”

Except you wipe his deck off the floor and Itto is. Flabbergasted while you try not to laugh too hard at his reaction. Like bruh even his gang spectating the duel had lost their hopes of their boss winning at all when they witness how outmatched Itto is against you the whole game. Itto’s character cards are all gone and yet only ONE of your character cards has taken some damage. That’s how skewed the matchup was.

Of course, as it is with Itto, expect him to challenge you again and again until he gets a win. In the meantime, you start coaching Itto about the game more, help to optimise his deck, and point out his mistakes and what he could have done better. Itto is an eager student and is in awe when you explain the strats and reasoning behind them. Itto isn’t exactly the brightest but damn even he can see that you know what the fuck you’re doing (if he’s crushing on you he’ll think that’s hot af. You’re so amazing?? And he gets to learn and spend time with you hehe totally not part of his master plan to get closer to you).

The moment Cyno notices you have a tcg deck, he’s going to immediately challenge you. Cyno goes all out and dramatic in calling out his challenge, as how it’s done in those card game medias. He absolutely HAS to battle any fellow tcg player since he’s that hardcore of a tcg nerd. The two of you will eventually engage in a duel (if you’re in a public place, expect to attract a LOT of attention because Cyno is too well known as the general mahamatra AND a proud tcg gamer). The man even narrates some of his actions while playing since he’s that much of a fucking dork. How adorable.

It’s a tense yet action-packed match. Cyno is a very good player, but evidently so are you. Spectators (if you guys are somewhere public) are starting to exchange bets on who would win. No one knows who’s going to come out on top because the two of you are so evenly matched that it could go either way. Cyno has that determined glint in his eyes as he figures out ways to beat you, yet somehow you anticipate his strategy and neutralise it, and vice versa.

Regardless of who wins though, it’s by a close margin. Cyno extends an invitation to play more matches with you whenever he’s free. How could he not when he just had the most thrilling duel of his life? You take up on his offer, since there are few players who can go toe-to-toe with you, and you can recognise that Cyno is a fellow tcg nerd like you. Boy, you two are going to get along so well. I can imagine both of you having conversations about the card metas and deckbuilding, which can sound like absolute nonsense to anyone who isn’t as hardcore abt the game. (And if Cyno has a crush on you, rip Tighnari because he has to witness the man blunders about in trying to earn your affections - keyword: TRY - and the fennec fox hybrid facepalms when Cyno keeps using tcg as a incredibly convenient excuse to hang out with you. For love of Lesser Lord Kusanali-)

Kaeya somehow picks up the fact that you’re into tcg (even if you don’t bring it up to him at all, he will know thanks to his ability to get others to share info with him, and some ppl might have mentioned you being an absolute BEAST at the game). So what does he do about it? Bring it up to you, of course, and ask if you wanna play a round or two.

Note that Kaeya isn’t a full-on hardcore nerd about the game. That’s not his thing. He doesn’t exactly know the ins and outs of the cards, but he has an incredibly strategic mindset that helps him beat most players. How else do you think he got to the final round in the tcg event competition? Still, Kaeya is absolutely intrigued when you match up against him, and said intrigue increases when you’re clearly winning. Seems like it’s true when he heard those rumors of you being an expert in tcg. He’s full on smirking when you beat him, and he claps slowly while congratulating you on your win and complimenting your skills (yet with the way he’s acting, it seems like he’s won somehow).

After that match, Kaeya will occasionally play a few rounds of tcg with you in his free time. I mean, he gets to sharpen his mind, hang out with you, gain information and be entertained. An all-round plus in his book. (And if somehow Kaeya has feelings that a biit more than platonic towards you, he’s going to use tcg as a way to get closer to you. Heck, he might even start paying closer attention to your tips and strategies to formulate a game plan. Be wary if he makes a bet with you through tcg, cus that means he’s got something planned. And if he happens to win the game and the bet? Well, hope you don’t mind doing a favor for him in the form of a kiss, maybe even a dinner date.

#genshin impact x reader #itto x reader #kaeya x reader #cyno x reader #arataki itto x reader #genius invokation tcg #if u cant tell I made this cus I realised there arent many posts whereby reader is a dedicated tcg player #and in those fics when reader plays agt the characters they lose lol #i mean thats fine cus some ppl do relate to that and dont play the card game well #but this is for my fellow tcg addicts who love the card game #yes im one of those who loves the big update cus NOW I GET TO CHALLENGE MORE CHARACTERS MWAHHAHAHAHAH #i am one of those bitches who uses a freeze deck sorry #if only I can play agt the genshin characters rather than their ai :(((( like I wanna see how i compare #ai sucks cus I have seen too many occasions where they fuck up #ah whelp

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sword-dad-fukuzawa · 4 months

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here’s to a year of trigun :] just a cute little (1k. oops.) essay reflecting back on how it’s changed my life.

(twitter crosspost LOL)

You know that strange, dissatisfying limbo between hyperfixations? That was me in January. A 2-year long obsession with Genshin Impact was dragging itself to its grave and I was struggling with life. I got diagnosed with a rare chronic pain disorder at around the same time I caught mono and strep simultaneously (that week SUCKED), classes were kicking my ass, and I was experiencing the existential loneliness of adulthood for the first time.

University student things!

And to make it all extra unbearable, my writing was empty. Soulless. I’d write something for a zine and go damn—this shit is awful. Not because it was technically flawed or anything, but there was just…nothing there. I would stare at my stats page on Ao3 waiting for comments and then bitterly complain at my friends when no one wanted to read my work. Hell, I don’t think I wanted to read my work. I’m sure you know the feeling.

And because my writing is how I cope with Everything, being unable to write made the Everything so, so much worse.

Then—and I forget exactly how I heard about it—I learned that Trigun Stampede had just released its fourth episode. I knew of Trigun from a buddy of mine who had been excitement-posting about the reboot months before, but all I knew about the reboot was that Yoshitsugu Matsuoka was voicing the main character. I had a free afternoon—why not give it a try?

I still have my liveblogging from January. Here was my initial reaction:

I was having a great fuckin’ time.

February rolls around and I am immediately, irreversibly, hit with Plantcest brainrot so bad that I discard any pretense of being icked out by brocest ship and I write a 9k long KV thesis called “we’ve got to get back to that stinking garden,” named after a Natalie Diaz poem called “my brother named gethsemane,” which is, truly and genuinely, The Poem on Brothers (Complicated) of all time. That fic is where the visions and prophesies came back, where I started feeling like my writing was impactful again. Like it meant something. It was my first ever foray into in-narrative smut and the first of many, many attempts to capture a future where Vash and Knives love each other even after the end of everything.

This is really where I found my footing on Twitter and as a short story writer, I think. Where I started really caring about making every word of a narrative pay rent, about conveying and evoking specific, tangible feelings, and exploring genres of media I’d never really been interested in before. Before February, I wrote mostly genfic and T-rated romance. Every so often, I’d dabble in some graphic violence.

And hey! Now I write hardcore kink and graphic erotica. The gore I used to dabble in is now something I dive into feetfirst and with a rabid desire to make it as sexy as possible. I fetishize the crease of an elbow and the bristly sections of an undercut and I write about brothers having nasty, angry, dubiously consensual sex. I could not possibly tell you how I got here, but shit, man, I don’t regret a damn thing.

It’s through Trigun that I met some of the most talented, sweetest, most encouraging folk. Plantcest creators, Vashwood creators, people who saw me writing ZazieVash and went hello motherfucker please feed me some more, Romeryl enthusiasts, Kniveswood and Plantwood enjoyers…shit, guys. You’re all so fucking cool.

I got invited to a zine for the first time, I started taking commissions (and holy shit, what the fuck, I still can’t wrap my head around that at all. The fuck you mean, you’ll pay me Real Actual Money for personalized fic? Insane to me. I’m so goddamn grateful.) for the first time, and hell, I published a poetry collection for the first time. Which people downloaded? And tipped me for? What the fuck? I’m still reeling from that. Thank you, by the way. Genuinely.

What else this year…well. I commissioned art for the first time, I participated in more big bangs and exchanges than ever, I read voraciously and wrote with just as much fervor. I watched ‘98 and I cried and I read half of TriMax and cried some more. I wrote more erotica than I ever have, and I wrote more fic that I’m genuinely, painfully proud of this year than any other year.

A lot of my writing is about grief and rage, and a lot of it is about trying to be funny in the face of that. A lot of is about learning to live, because that’s what I’m doing right now, despite everything. A lot of it is about trying to be kind.

But in summary, because this is getting ridiculously long, here’s what I got out of Trigun:

Vash the Stampede refuses to die. I’m trying to emulate that.

Meryl Stryfe cares about doing the right thing, even if it means she’ll get in the middle of a fight between aliens armed with two bullets in a tiny pistol.

Wolfwood is carefully, disastrously kind. I want to be like that.

And Knives is nuttier than a Victorian lady in a room painted in arsenic green, but still. I love him anyway.

And Milly :] no thoughts about Milly. I love Milly because she is also incredibly kind :]

Trigun has changed my entire goddamn life this year. I think it’s made me a better person. It’s certainly made me a better writer, and it’s connected me to so many lovely and beautiful people. Thank you all for sticking around, and here’s to another year of love, peace, and unhinged porn. I love you all :]

#trigun

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sarahisgay01 · 2 years

Text

My Girl (Pt.2)

Minors DNI (18+ Only!!!!)

Top!Robin x Top!Nancy x Trans!girl bottom!reader (Somewhat Modern)

Notes: Reader is AMAB and transitioned hormonally before puberty, underage drinking

Part 1:

You and Robin had been dating for months now and the two of you were so in love. One night, you and Robin were talking about everyone in the group while tipsy. It all started a couple days ago when your parents said they were going to be leaving this weekend to go visit some family members. You called Robin immediately and told her the news. It was now Saturday night, Robin had just gotten off from work and came straight to your house. When she arrived, the two of you greeted each other with a kiss and you said, “Guess what I have?” With an excited smile on her face, Robin said, “What? Tell me!” You walked into your kitchen and pulled out a bottle of vodka from a cabinet below the sink. Robin said, “Yes!” and you said, “Have you eaten enough to drink?” She smiled at your concern and said, “I had breakfast, lunch, and snacked throughout the day, thank you for caring, sweet girl.” The two of you opened the bottle and passed it between each other. You started talking about the group and Robin said, “Do you remember your first impressions of everyone? I’m really interested because I’ve known them or known of them for such a long time. You were new though, you knew nothing about them.” A puzzling look appeared on your face and you said, “I uh- I think so, yeah.” Robin replied, “Great! Okay, cool. What was your first impression of Steve?” You laughed and said, “A big flirt and someone who’s way too obsessed with his hair.” She replied, “Well, you weren’t wrong on that one, (Y/N). You hit the nail right on the head.” You laughed and said, “Now that I know him though, I know that he’s much more than that and he’s a very caring person.” Robin smiled and said, “He is. He’s changed a lot, he’s a great guy. Don’t you dare tell him I said that!” You laughed again and said, “I wouldn’t dare give him an ego boost.” The two if you were dying laughing now and after you both calmed down, Robin continued. She said, “What about Eddie?” and you replied, “Oh, Eds! So, from his appearance I thought he was super scary and probably mean. Once he starts to talk though, I realized it’s just a facade. He was so sweet and funny, I liked him a lot when I first met him.” Robin said, “That was mine too! Yeah, totally thought he was this hardcore metal guy that was super dark. He’s really the total opposite!” The two of you giggled and here comes the question you didn’t want to answer. Robin says, “Last but not least, Nancy.”

Your face went red recalling your first impression of Nancy, you looked back on it, replaying it in your head. Everyone was at Steve’s waiting for you and Robin to arrive, waiting to meet you. When you first saw her, your heart stopped for a moment, seeing a beautiful girl with a smile on her face waiting to talk to you. Your first impression was that she was stunning, that was it. Then, when she started talking, asking you interesting questions, and wanting to get to know you more, you realized how much you enjoyed talking to her. You replied back, “I uh- I uh um- I don’t remember.” Robin studied your face, your red cheeks, your body slightly tense, and said, “Bullshit.” She laughed and said, “Wanna tell me the truth now, sweetheart?” You looked down and said, “I uh- I- Well, found her very nice and I liked how she asked me interesting questions. Mhmmm, that’s all.” Again, Robin said, “Bullshit” and laughed. She said, “You totally thought she was hot, didn’t you? You can admit it, (Y/N), it’s okay.” You continued looking down at the floor and mumbled, “Y- Yeah. I uh- I did. I thought she was beautiful.” Robin teased you and said, “You have a little crush on Nance!”, then started giggling. You shot your head up and replied in a playful tone, “I do not! I love you, you idiot!” with a smile on your face. She smiled back and said, “I love you too, but you totally do!” You playfully shoved her and she said, “I mean, who hasn’t. It’s Nancy fucking Wheeler for crying out loud.” You giggled and replied, “Good point”, then Robin cupped your cheeks. She said, “I have the hottest girl to call mine, right here” and she kissed you lightly. The two of you kissed for a while, before Robin admitted to being tired after her long day of working and dealing with customers. You both went to your room and got ready for bed. After you both were in your pajamas, Robin laid flat on the bed and you cuddled into her. Once you were comfy, she turned the light off and you two said, “I love you” to each other, before falling asleep. The next day, everyone had taken off work to hangout at your house and watch movies. You were in the living room with Robin and you got a call close to 11:00am from Steve saying that he and Eddie weren’t feeling well. Something about Eddie cooking dinner for him last night and he believes Eddie gave them food poisoning. You laughed and said, “Alright, I hope you both feel better.” Robin said, “Who was that?” and you said, “Steve, he said he and Eddie are sick. Apparently Eddie cooked them dinner last night and Steve thinks Eddie gave them food poisoning.” She started laughing and you said, “Looks like it’s just the girls.” Robin teased you and said, “Mhmmm, just two beautiful girls, what are you gonna do with yourself, pretty girl?” You lightly shoved her and said, “Don’t make me regret telling you what I said last night!” Robin smirked and said, “You don’t already?”, then started dying laughing. After she stopped laughing, she grabbed you by your waist and kissed you. You kissed her back hard and she reciprocated.

When you released from the kiss, out of breath, you checked the time on your watch. You said, “We do have some time before Nancy’s supposed to be here.” Robin said, “So needy pretty girl, so needy for me. Huh (Y/N)?” You replied, “Mhmmm, want you Rob. Need you.” She grabbed your hand and pulled you up to your bedroom. You closed the door behind you and Robin pushed you onto the bed, a moan leaving your lips, as your back hit the mattress. She smiled and said, “Mmmm, those pretty moans get me every time, sweet girl.” Then, she started kissing on your neck, which turned into sucking deep bruises. Her hands were under your shirt, pinching your nipples and making you breathily moan her name. You started to get hard quick and buck your hips, causing Robin to grin. She said, “You want me to touch you, pretty girl?” You replied, “Fuck, please Robin! Robin, please!” Robin pulled down your pants and underwear, then started stroking your beautiful cock, causing you to moan. She said, “Fuck, you’re so beautiful like this. So beautiful and ready for me to use.” You whined and said, “R- Ride m- me, please! Please, Rob!” Robin said, “Good girl, using your manners, that’s my good girl” and she got off the bed. She took off her pants and underwear, then climbed back onto the bed. You took a finger and put it right on her clit, rubbing it a bit to get her more wet. After 30 seconds or so, Robin climbed on top of you and you gently guided her down onto your pretty cock. She moaned at the feeling and her head found it’s way to your chest. You started guiding her hips up and down, both moaning at the sensations. It only took a couple minutes for the two of you to get close to reaching your climax. You and Robin were so drawn into each other that you didn’t hear a knock at the door. What’s even worse is that neither one of you heard it open or Nancy calling for either of you. Neither one of you heard the footsteps coming up the stairs, nor the door to your bedroom open. You didn’t notice Nancy until a loud gasp and “Oh shit!” left her lips. She stood at the door, eyes wide and too in shock to close the door.

You felt uncomfortable, not only because you were naked, but mostly because now someone else knew your secret. Robin got off of you, making you whimper from being so close to your climax. She turned to face Nancy and noticed that her cheeks were pink. She also noticed her pupils were starting to expand and a big grin appeared on Robin’s face. Robin said, “Like what you see, Nance?” and Nancy replied, “I uh- I uh- no, no, no. I’m uh- I’m-” Nancy was cut off by Robin, who said, “That’s too bad cause, I know (Y/N), thinks you’re beautiful. She has a little crush on you.” A bright red blush formed on your cheeks, but you noticed one formed on Nancy’s as well. She peaked her head from around Robin’s body and said, “You- You do?” You replied with a hesitant nod and Robin said, “Be a good girl and use your words for Nance, sweetheart.” A whiney hum left your mouth and you said, “Y- Yeah, I uh- I do, Nance. I think you’re absolutely stunning.” Nancy smiled and said, “I think you are too, (Y/N). Absolutely, beautiful.” You said, “But um- Nance. I do have to say, I’m not uh- I’m not biologically a female. I’m uh- I’m transgender, so if that changes anyth-” and Nancy interrupted you. She said, “Why would- Why would that change anything, (Y/N)?” You smiled and said, “I just wanted to make sure, I guess.” Robin still had her big, stupid grin on her face and said, “Well, Nance, you’re welcome to join, if you want. You caught us at sort of a bad time, we were both close to our orgasms.” Nancy grinned and said, “Oh? Is that so?” Your eyes were going back between her and Robin, not knowing who to focus on. Robin said, “Oh, Nance?”, she replied back, “Yeah?”, and Robin said, “I’m okay with whatever you want to do with her and (Y/N) will be a good girl for you. Won’t you, sweet girl?” You started nodding your head rapidly and said, “Mhmmm, I’ll be such a good girl. I’ll be a good girl for both of you, I promise! I’ll be a good girl for you, Nance!” Nancy’s pupils now engulfed her blue eyes and her grin grew wider. In a soft, condescending tone she said, “Such a needy little thing, aren’t you? Mmmm, let mommy take care of you, darling.” You moaned at her tone and phrasing, calling herself mommy made your pretty cock somehow get harder. Both girls watched as your hips slightly bucked at what Nancy said. Robin said, “Nance, I think she liked that” and Nancy looked at you, then replied, “You want mommy to touch you, baby?” A whine left your lips and you begged, you begged for Nancy to touch you. You said, “Please mommy, please! Please, touch me! Please!” and she giggled at your neediness. She climb over on to the bed and sat on her heels between your legs. She said, “Can mommy kiss you, (Y/N)?” and you replied with a little whimper, saying, “Please.” She grinned and said, “Such a well mannered girl, so good. Such a good girl, (Y/N).” You bit your lip, holding back a moan, but Nancy leaned in and kissed you. It was weird kissing someone other than Robin, but you liked that she was watching and both of you trusted Nancy. You stopped thinking about it so much and focused on her lips. Her lips were soft and sweet, tasting like vanilla. When she released from the kiss, your lips tried to chase hers, which made her and Robin laugh. Nancy leaned back down, after she had caught her breath and kissed you again, this time more heated. She bit your bottom lip, eliciting a pretty moan and slipped her tongue in your mouth. You swirled your tongue with hers and before you knew it, her lips left your mouth, again.

Nancy moved to biting tender spots on your neck, then licking them afterwards, easing some of the pain. Then, she said, “(Y/N), can mommy take this off?” and tugged at your shirt. You replied back, begging and said, “Please mommy! Please take it off! Want you to take it off!” She said, “So needy, baby” and grinned, then lifted your shirt over your head. Nancy dropped it to the floor and let out a small moan at the sight of your chest. She said, “Fuck, you’re so beautiful, (Y/N). Be a good girl for me and lay flat on your back.” You did exactly what she said and then she was hovering on top of you. Nancy looked deep into your eyes and said, “Good girl, (Y/N).” A whimper left your mouth and Nancy grinned. She moved her face down and pointed her tongue, then experimentally flicked your nipple. You let out a slightly loud moan and she continued. Soon, Nancy’s lips were latched onto your nipple and sucking, causing you to moan even louder. She moved over to the other side, giving it the same attention. Once Nancy was satisfied, she looked over at Robin, who was sitting in a chair, watching the two of you like a hawk. You saw Nancy’s head was looking at her, so you looked too and were met with seeing Robin trying not to touch herself. Nancy said, “Rob, come here” and she immediately got up, then stood next to the bed. Robin said, “What’s up, Nance?” and Nancy said, “Do you want to touch me?” Robin’s face turned bright red and she looked at you for approval. You giggled and said, “Sweetheart, after everything I’ve done with Nance, I don’t think you need my permission.” Robin nodded, then looked at Nancy and said, “Please, I do.” Nancy grinned and said, “Kiss me. Kiss mommy, Rob.” Robin moaned and then quickly leaned in to kiss her. She kissed her slowly, making you whine, both from watching them kiss and you needed their touches. Robin tugged at Nancy’s shirt and Nancy released from the kiss for a quick moment, so Robin could take off her shirt. Before they went back to kissing, Robin said, “Mommy, can I take off your bra too, please? Please, mommy?” Nancy said, “Mhmm, only cause you asked so nicely” and Robin quickly unclasped her bra. She let out a moan at the sight and stared at her bare chest. Robin pulled Nancy back in for a kiss, then started kneading her breast. Nancy breathily moaned and you whined, your pretty cock was now throbbing. You knew that if you touched it you were going to get punished, so you sat there, needy and whining. Nancy released from the kiss and said, “Rob, can mommy take off your shirt?” Robin nodded and said, “Mhmmm, want you to mommy.” Nancy lifted it up and over her head, then let out a little moan at the sight of Robin’s bare chest. She immediately started kneading her breasts and Robin threw her head back, breathily moaning, “Fuck.” You whimpered, too needy and impatient, to just sit and watch. Nancy retracted her hands and looked back at you. She said with fake pity, “Aw, poor thing. So needy, darling. So desperate to be touched.” You whined and said, “Please mommy! Please Rob! Please! Need to be touched! Need you, please!” Both of them laughed and Robin said, “Hmmm what do you think Nance, should we touch her? I mean, she’s been a good girl. Her pretty cock is throbbing. My needy little slut needs us, Nance.” You whined at Robin’s words and Nancy said, “Hmmm, I think she’s been a good girl. Yeah, Rob, let’s reward her for being a good girl.”

Nancy said, “Rob, you ride her. Okay?” Robin looked at you and grinned, “Mhmmm, more than okay.” Nancy looked at you and said, “Can mommy ride your face, darling?” Your eyes went wide and you gulped, feeling excited, but also nervous. You said, “Y- Yeah. That’s- That’s f- f- fine. Mhmmm.” Robin knows that you only stutter like that when you’re nervous. She looked at you with soft eyes and in a soft tone, she said, “Are you nervous, sweetheart? You gotta tell us if you are or if you don’t want to do something.” You said, “Want to, want to so bad. Just- Just don’t wanna mess up.” Robin said, “Sweetheart, just relax, okay? You’re gonna do just fine, sweet girl. I promise.” Nancy cupped your cheeks and said, “(Y/N), you’re gonna do great and if you want I’ll guide you, okay?” Your eyes softened and you looked at both of them, then said, “Yeah. Okay, thank you.” Both of them smiled and your body relaxed, no longer tense. Nancy wanted to help you relax a bit more, so she said, “(Y/N), be a good girl and come help mommy take off her jeans and panties.” You shot up from the bed and said, “Yes, mommy!” Robin giggled and said, “So eager to please, such a sweet girl.” You hummed and dropped to your knees in front of Nancy, then started unbuttoning her jeans. Once they were unbuttoned and unzipped, you pulled them down her legs, then helped her step out of them. When her jeans were off and you looked back up at her panties you saw the big wet patch on them. A moan left your lips and you said, “Mommy you’re so wet.” Nancy grinned and said, “Mhmmm, can’t help it when I’ve been touching two beautiful girls.” She watched as both you and Robin blushed at the comment and was proud of herself for flustering both of you. You slowly pulled down her panties and helped her step out of them. Both you and Robin gawked at Nancy’s naked body, taking in the beauty of it. Robin said, “Holy shit, Nance! You’re so fucking hot” and you said, “Mommy you’re so beautiful.” Your pretty cock was throbbing even more now. You let out a whimper and Robin said, “Okay, sweet girl, it’s okay. Mommy and I are going to take good care of you, sweetheart. Be a good girl for us and go lay on the bed, flat on your back.” Quickly, you got up and got yourself comfortable on the bed, flat on your back, like Robin instructed.

Robin got on top of you and kissed you, then you helped her position herself down onto your pretty cock. You both loudly moaned as she slowly took all of you inside her. Nancy waited until Robin was fully sat on your cock before she went to position herself on your mouth. When she hovered over your mouth, you stuck your tongue out flat and pulled her hips down on you. You tasted her wetness, then moaned at the taste and Nancy moaned feeling your tongue on her sensitive pussy. She started grinding on your face and Robin started riding you. You grabbed Robin’s hips, helping her move up and down. The moans coming out of your mouth were muffled by Nancy’s pussy, but the vibrations from them got Nancy closer to her climax. Nancy was moaning loudly, saying, “Fuck, (Y/N)! Fuck, you’re doing so well! Such a good girl for mommy! Fuck! Keep going, (Y/N)!” Robin was also moaning loudly and Nancy’s moans were making her climax approach faster. She moaned out, “Fuck, (Y/N)! Fuck! So good! God, you feel so good, (Y/N)! Fuck!” You started bucking your hips into Robin, causing her to scream out in pleasure. You moaned and the vibrations, mixed with the fast pace of Nancy’s grinding was going made her scream out in pleasure too. Nancy moaned out, “Close, (Y/N)! I’m so close! Be a good girl and make mommy cum, baby!” As Robin said earlier, you were eager to please, so you grabbed Nancy’s hips and held her still on your face. You started sucking on her clit and you moved your hands back to Robin’s waist. Your hands gripped her waist tight and you roughly fucked up into her. Both girls were moaning loudly at your movements and you felt yourself about to come undone. Nancy and Robin screamed at almost the same time and came. You were only seconds behind them and your eyes rolled back as you came inside Robin. Nancy hopped off your face and next to you on the bed, then you started heavy breathing, catching your breath. Robin slowly got off of you too and both of you whimpered at the loss of contact. She looked at your face and grinned, it was covered in Nancy’s cum and wetness. She moved closer to you and kissed you, tasting Nancy on your lips. Robin hummed in pleasure at the taste, then released from the kiss and looked at Nancy. She said, “Mmmm Nance, you taste so sweet” and you hummed a “Mhmmm” in agreement, with a blissful smile on your face. You weren’t sure what you were expecting as a response, but her whining definitely wasn’t one of them. Robin looked at her and said, “Nance, what’s wrong?” Nancy replied, “It’s- It’s stupid.” You said, “No, nothing you say is ever stupid, Nance.” She said, “Well, I uh- I wanna um- I wanna ride your pretty cock. I want to so bad, (Y/N).” Robin grinned and said, “(Y/N), you want Nancy to ride you, sweetheart?” Your eyes were wide and in shock, you nodded your head rapidly.

Nancy said, “Use your words for us, darling” and you began begging. You said, “Mommy please! Mommy please ride me! Want you to, please! Please, mommy!” Nancy said, “That’s a good girl, baby” and moved to position herself kneeling over top of you. You grabbed her hips and helped her position herself onto your pretty cock. She loudly moaned as you slowly guided her onto your cock. She said, “Holy shit! Fuck, (Y/N)! That feels so good, fuck!” You started moving her hips up and down, then threw your head back, letting out a loud moan. Robin moved to where Nancy was sitting before and reached her hand out, then started rubbing Nancy’s clit. Nancy screamed out, “Fuck Robin! Fuck (Y/N)! Fuck!” and her body started twitching. Your pretty cock started twitching inside her, getting close to your second orgasm. You moaned out, “Fuck, mommy! Fuck! I’m close! I’m close, mommy!” Through broken moans, Nancy said, “Me- Me- Me too, baby. Make- Make mommy- Make mommy cum, (Y/N). Be a- Be a good girl, (Y/N). Be a good girl and make- and make mommy c- c- cum.” You gripped her hips tight and started roughly bucking your hips into her. Robin started rubbing her clit faster and faster. She screamed out, “Fuck yes, (Y/N)! Fuck, Robin! Fuck! Gonna cum! Gonna cu-!” and she was interrupted by her orgasm hitting her hard. Robin moved her both her hands to your chest and took her fingers, then harshly pinched your nipples. You screamed out in pleasure and with one more rough buck into Nancy, you came. After you came again, you were completely fucked out. Your face was blissed out and both the girls thought you looked so cute like that. Robin said, “Aw Nance look, she’s completely fucked out.” Nancy replied, “Such a pretty little thing, all fucked out after we used you. Mommy loved using you, pretty baby.” You replied back with a hum of pleasure and Robin said, “I think we fucked her dumb too, Nance. She can’t even speak, she’s so blissed out.” Both Robin and Nancy giggled at you, while you nodded your head in agreement with Robin. After about 15 minutes of laying there, you tapped Robin and she looked at you, concerned. She said, “You okay, sweet girl?” and you nodded, then mumbled, “Want shower.” Robin could tell it was hard for you to talk, so she didn’t pressure you, she said, “Okay, sweetheart. I’ll go start the shower, do you want to shower alone?” You shook your head rapidly, no and she said, “Woah, okay, (Y/N). Relax, for me, sweetheart. Okay? Do you want all of us with you?” You nodded your head and looked at Nancy. Nancy said, “Mhmmm, that’s okay with me. I think we all need to shower.” You hummed with a smile on your face and Robin kissed your head. Then, she got up and headed to your bathroom, to go start the shower. Nancy gave you a kiss on the cheek and said, “You’re so beautiful, (Y/N).” Your smile grew wider and you gave Nancy a kiss on her cheek back, causing her to smile too.

Robin came back a couple minutes later and said, “Okay, shower’s warm and ready.” Slowly, you and Nancy got up, then walked to the bathroom. You had a large shower, so the three of you could easily fit inside of it. The three of you showered together, then dried off, and changed into some comfy clothes. After everyone was dressed, the three of you went downstairs and watched movies like you were supposed to hours ago. You sat on the couch cuddled up between Robin and Nancy, confused on what’s supposed to happen now. Robin saw you weren’t focused on the movie and looked nervous. She got up and paused the movie, which had Nancy confused, until she looked at you. Robin quickly went and sat back next you, then placed her hand on your knee. She said, “(Y/N), what’s wrong? You look upset.” Nancy started scratching your back lightly and you stuttered, “I’m- I’m-” You took a long pause and loudly said, “I’m confused! I don’t know what to- what to think of this!” Nancy’s face dropped from concerned to guilty and she said, “I uh- Maybe I should go, I’m sorry, (Y/N).” You grabbed her wrist and said, “No, Nance. Stay, please. Please, stay.” She was tense on the couch, but stayed and Robin said, “Okay. Well, let’s talk about it. What’s confusing you?” You looked at her with tears in your eyes and said, “I love you, Rob. I love you so so much. You know that I do, but I also love Nance.” Then you turned to look at her and her face was bright red. You said, “Nance, I love you. I love you more than a friend, just like I love Robin as more than a friend.” Tears starting running down your face and Nancy said, “(Y/N), I don’t- I don’t know what to say.” She cupped your cheeks and wiped your tears with the pads of her thumbs. Robin said in a calm tone, “Well, do you love her, Nance?” She looked you in your eyes and hesitantly nodded, then looked at Robin and said, “I love you too, Rob. I’ve always loved you.” Robin’s face turned red and she said, “W- Wait, w- w- what?” Nancy said, “Yeah, honestly I’m surprised you never noticed.” Robin smiled and said, “I wasn’t uh- I wasn’t expecting that, but I love both of you, so much. So, why don’t we all three just date? It’s called a polyamory relationship.” Both you and Nancy looked confused and Nancy said, “I don’t- I don’t know how that- how that works.” You nodded in agreement and Robin said, “Neither do I, but if the two of you want to, we can figure it out. Step by step, for right now, but only if you two want to.” Nancy said, “I’d uh- I’d like to” and you said, “Me- Me too.” Robin smiled and said, “Great! So does that make the three of us girlfriends?” You and Robin looked at Nancy, who was smiling and she said, “Mhmmm, girlfriends.” The three of you were smiling and giggling, all happy that the three of you were so in love with each other. All of you happy that everyone’s feelings were out in the open. Robin looked at you giggling and said, “Now, can you admit that you have a crush on Nance?” You giggled and cupped Nancy’s cheeks, then kissed the tip of her nose. A smile appeared on your face while looking at her and you said, “Mhmmm, I definitely do.” The three of you giggled and you said, “This is probably awful of me to say, but I’m so grateful for whatever Eddie cooked Steve last night.” The three of you laughed so hard and both girls gave you a kiss on the cheek. Robin got up and played the movie, then the three of you cuddled on the couch, with you in between them. The only thought you had in this moment was, “I could get used to this”, with a smile on your face.

This turned into a poly relationship, but I’m not mad about it. Anyway, hope you all enjoyed part 2!!😊💖

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jmdbjk · 1 year

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More Legos...

(if you must, Jimin...)

After obsessing over whether the camera was straight enough, or were the lights too bright, whether the distance he was from the camera was good (obsessive perfectionist) he finally gave us the big news that his album is coming in MARCH!

Here are my preliminary notes and thoughts on the upcoming and very anticipated PJM1:

Track 1: shook and light-headed

Track 2: shook and drooling

Track 3: shook and finally taking a breath

Track 4: shook and uwu-ing

Track 5: shook and drooling again

Track 6: shook and picking myself up off the floor

Track 7: shook and sobbing because it’s the last song.

But of course, in my delulu mind there will be 13 tracks but let’s not get greedy...

Prediction: Jimin’s next live will have him building the LEGO BTS Dynamite set...

Off-topic...look, Namjoon posted a recent pic of Jungkook on his Instagram stories:

Joon’s also deleted or archived all his Instagram posts except 13 that have to do with Indigo... WHAT’S UP WITH THAT???

Back to the main event: Jimin talked about straightening his teeth again. The best option for him is probably the Invisalign that you can remove when necessary. I wonder if the process is something he can be doing while he’s enlisted.

He laughed and said “what do we have to fight about?” when someone asked him if he and Tae still fight a lot. As he continued reading the comments he said “Marriage!... one day. I’m too busy right now to get married.” I don’t know if the comment was “marriage one day” or if “one day” was part of his own response. He spoke a little about Jin. It’s clear that Jimin looks up to Jin.

It was so cute when he was making fun of himself being so shy when he was recording Vibe with Taeyang.

My man with some plastic flowers he made with his own two hands:

Losing track of what day it is, having to figure out Valentine’s day is almost here... same babe, same...

I know some people sort of made a big deal over his comments about this. First of all, Jimin, no one said anything about White Day... second of all, he said “it’s fun” ...isn’t that enough to show that he acknowledges them? You guys with the hardcore ideas that certain things MUST be considered in a certain way ... GET OUT OF YOUR CLOSED BOX! He acknowledged they are special days that are fun. Why isn’t that enough?

Then he talks about showing us his moon tattoos and letting us know there will be an opportunity to do so...he’ll have a chance to show us. Because whipping off his shirt on a live would probably get him scolded worse than JK drinking while doing a live.

He also commented about Namjoon being “truly like a gift” in his songwriting skills.

Then mentions Suchwita...and gives us a spoiler:

Yoongi and Jimin drinking and talking about Jimin’s solo album... YES! PLEASE MAKE THIS HAPPEN UNIVERSE! DON’T TEASE ME AND THEN LEAVE ME SHATTERED IF IT DOES NOT HAPPEN!

You know... occasionally a comment that seems odd could very well hold a considerable amount of meaning:

Tears from working himself to the bone because of his passion to give his best to us... tears because of how moved he was from seeing all of us while performing... tears because when you are filled with fear and insecurity and see the outpouring of love... tears from the words he sees being said about him online... he says if he has to find a reason as to why (he’s not as emotional any more) he says it’s like as time has gone on, he’s not seen us in person, that his emotions have subsided. He is removed from personal appearances but still the fact they’ve achieved a certain level of success enables him to feel secure in his position and they can see we, Army, are not going to leave them. He’s also removed himself from social media.

He can be so unserious too... clocked out... hahahahaha... and that’s 12:30 a.m., 1:00 a.m.

When Unholy comes on he laughs, smirks, and he skips the song BECAUSE HE KNOWS ITS UNHOLY...(keeping it PG for Armys). We know Jimin was at work but now we know he continued watching JK’s live because he knows that Jungkook sung this.... okayyyyy.

We also had the pleasure of listening to Jimin hum/sing along to The Astronaut, Rush Hour, That That, Better Than This by Lauv, Safe Zone, Yet to Come, Closer, Empty Road by Taeyang, Wildflower, Telepathy, Euphoria (which he admitted he loves and he let it play twice and then continued to sing it), Filter to which he commented that he was really bummed out when he never got to perform this for us live and that HE MAY ONE DAY DO THAT ASDAFWTFOMFG!!!

Someone in comments said they needed Jimin to motivate them and that they hated themselves... those were serious words and Jimin paused to consider his response... he said “you should still know how to cherish and like yourself. I think it actually isn’t easy to accept this usually. I think you should know why you are thinking in that manner (you should figure out what is causing you to think that way) and I think I need to hear you out in order to say something to you (I need to know more about the situation in order to offer constructive advice). Even so, you only have yourself. I hope you don’t hate yourself too much.” Words from a man who has perhaps had his own dealings with this sort of thing.

He wrapped it up by saying he’ll talk about the making of PJM1 after it’s release for us to stay safe and stay well.

The thought occurred to me: is it just me or has the number of times that the idea of the members dating increased exponentially these last few months?

Namjoon flippantly(?) saying "kind of like a girlfriend for me" during Big Brain/Useless Knowledge TV Show. (What is the title of that show? I keep forgetting...)

Both Jimin and Jungkook teasing Armys who comment "let's date for a few seconds" while doing their live broadcasts.

And the big rumor of Tae’s that I won’t mention because people are irrational and I don’t have time for that.

Jimin even said there’s more comments about marriage these days than ever before. Beyond “Marry Me Yoongi,” the topic of marriage just seems to pop up more frequently.

Are they attempting to normalize Tannies dating? Just like they've normalized (sorta) showing more skin? and normalized their inevitable enlistment. Are they are making us take baby steps for everything?

Is this part of Chapter 2/more mature Bangtan agenda? Please feel free to discuss below...

#naked bangtan #dating bangtan #soldier bangtan #pjm1 is coming #like yourself/love yourself #not a big LEGO enthusiast #jimin watches JK lives while at work JUST LIKE ME #jimin on suchwita please

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hecksupremechips · 29 days

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Ive referenced this tale a few times but I think because it’s easter Saturday and I’m a fed up little shit this year, it’s time I tell the story of THE easter saturday

So to establish a few things to anyone who wasn’t raised as a damn catholic, easter saturday mass is kinda infamous for just being the worst. First off, it often starts later, like at 8. Secondly, it lasts forever. Normal mass will have a reading from the bible, a responsorial psalm, and then a second reading. This mass has 7 readings and yes, there is a responsorial psalm between each of them. If you’re lucky, the priest will decide to only do like 3 readings and then just move on. And the last few things about easter saturday mass is that for the part with all the readings, all the lights are out and everyone has to hold a candle. Symbolizes some shit about everyone being lost without jesus or some shit idk. And there’s a part after communion where anyone who wants to be confirmed into the catholic church can do so

Most people don’t go to easter saturday mass because really why would you, but around the time I was a teenager my family always went on saturday instead of sunday just cuz we didn’t wanna get up early and also cuz easter sunday is like the biggest day of the year and it’s crowded as absolute fuck it’s awful. And I mean, we never really had to deal with too much bullshit cuz the priest cut down the readings and often didn’t even bother playing music cuz no one wanted to be there lol. It was a pretty good deal

Enter THE easter saturday. I believe I was 17 and I still had to go to church but I was very much not having it anymore lol. And we were gonna do the usual late mass but a little special curveball came along. My sisters ex boyfriend, let’s call him Gary, decided he wanted to become catholic. Why. And when you get confirmed you need a confirmation sponsor, aka someone who’s already been confirmed, to be there with you. And he asked my sister to do it. Which is pretty weird cuz they had this complicated on again off again relationship but like, I’m pretty damn sure they weren’t dating at the time??? Why the fuck would you ask your ex girlfriend to be your fucking CONFIRMATION SPONSOR of all things that’s so bizarre lol

What’s even more bizarre is the fact that my parents decided to show up to support him. Gary was the ideal guy, good country boy, good ball player, with a good head on his shoulders. They definitely loved him more than my sister did and like still to this day talk about him all the time even though both him and my sister have moved on 😟. So fine okay this is what we’re doing, we were gonna go to stupid easter saturday mass anyways, we may as well support Gary in this catholic journey shit because we’re obsessed with him I guess. Whatever. But to make things EVEN WEIRDER, my fucking GRANDMA decides to come too. To support my sisters ex boyfriend. Because she thinks he’s the greatest guy since sliced bread and because she’s a hardcore catholic who loses her shit over new members of the church. So fucking. It’s me, my parents, and my grandma driving an hour and a half to the city to see this guy get confirmed. At least we won’t have to go to church in the morning

So we get there to this honestly very beautiful church like it’s one of those really old big city churches with massive stained glass windows and like 8 sets of pews and columns and shit. We meet up with Gary’s family, theres like 7 of them and none are catholic btw so they had no idea what to expect from this experience. Oh how I wish I could’ve saved them. We all try to sit together in one pew for some reason and it’s like very crowded and we have no room, something that was very unnecessary cuz we were literally in an almost completely empty church. Before the mass even starts, I’m getting lightheaded and sweating bullets from how cramped everything is, and cuz I was wearing "fancy clothes" aka a pink sweater and black joggers covered in lint cuz I was having an identity crisis and this was my fashion taste lol. I obviously didn’t wanna be there was just a lot of hostility towards me from everyone cuz I’m. You know. A fairy 🙊 and a bitch lol. So I feel a meltdown coming and I’m literally crying so I go to sit in this tiny pew kinda in the shadows where no one can see me. My dad joins in too so we’re just in this private spot away from the families

Then the mass finally starts. We go outside and get our candles lit in a big fire and sing a damn song and go to sit down in the pitch black church. We have the typical intro and. Then. This fucking like 25 year old altar boy gives a basic summary of the events of easter. We all know the hell out of them, we don’t need a reminder, but we get one anyway. This should’ve been like a reading that maybe lasted 2 minutes maximum. But no, no, Catholics don’t want you to have it easy and short. You came to easter saturday mass, and Buddy, you’re getting that goddamn easter saturday mass

This man. Sang, the entire summary. In that awkward chanty singing style that priests do sometimes. And it lasted, according to my watch, for 20 minutes. 20 minutes of this guy in this pitch black church with his face ominously illuminated by the candle he’s holding in his shaking hand just. Singing on the fly. The entire church is completely quiet the entire time and to make it worse he kinda just kept repeating the same point over and over he was like THIS IS THE NIIIIIGHT OHHHHH HOOOOOLYYYY NIGHT WHERE JEEEEESSUUUUUSSS DIIIEEED OHHHHHHH HE IS THE SON OF GOD, WHO IS ALSOOOOO CHRIST AND HIS NAME IS JESUUUUSSS CHRIST. I’m not even exaggerating here good god I wish I was. It was that bad. I was kinda just in that zoned out trance you enter whenever you’re at a church and you’re bored to death but at like the 10 minute mark I realized this man was STILL GOING and I just. I fucking lost it I couldn’t breathe I was very thankful the lights were out cuz I was absolutely dying. Even my dad, who’s so insanely catholic it’s creepy, started playing on his phone in the middle of it. And we had to sit there. And this was the BEGINNING, we still had god knows how long left of this thing

Finally, the altar boy stops singing and then probably went to go drown himself afterwards because how the fuck to you come back from that. The infamous readings start and ofc they do all 7 of them, why wouldn’t they. And the psalms in between were like 10 verses each and they of course sang every single one. And it was like some poor college kid who just looooves jesus so much singing and she. Couldnt sing for shit. And there was like piano and idk, a tambourine probably. I blacked out halfway through and just accepted that I was actually just gonna die in this church, I’d never ever escape. This is my life for the rest of time

And we couldn’t just leave is the thing. Not just cuz my family is so toxically devout, but cuz the one thing we were here for still had yet to happen. The fucking confirmation. How long did we have to wait before we got there? 2 and a half hours. And do you know how long it took? Less than 10 minutes. All for this stupid Gary, stupid fucking Gary who decided he just HAD to be catholic, we waited just for him. His poor family showed up for him, there were children man. Like, hyper, preschool aged children who had to sit through that. And then at 3 hours it finally ended and I just. Couldnt feel anything anymore. I looked at these people and I just wanted them all to feel the pain of a thousand deaths for making me sit through that shit. I literally suffered more than Jesus Christ

Gary, I hate you. You are nothing. You’re gonna love being catholic you stupid stupid shit stain

#the klock keeps ticking #im sure there were a lot more traumatic moments that happened but i mean i just i #i couldnt be bothered to pay attention i was experiencing death i was experiencing purgatory #i think that was when i just realized. i resent these people in my life they are worthless to me and never ever again #will i even set foot inside a catholic church unless im holding gasoline and a lighter #and i get to burn burn burn that bitch to the fucking ground along with everyone inside

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mrszeoxin · 9 months

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Revisiting Mystic Messenger (Zen, Yoosung, and Jaehee)

Full transparency, I played these three routes around April and May this year so they aren’t as fresh in my brain. It was super fun to do, I was totally obsessed with this game in high school. However, out of the three options for the Casual Story I had only played Yoosung’s route before, because he was the only one I wanted to date out of them and he was closest to me in age. So Zen and Jaehee’s stories were totally new to me.

Zen’s Route

Truth be told, I used to low-key hate Zen as a teenager. (Please do not hate me, we all have our preferences, and I married Shane in Stardew Valley so clearly people do not always like my favorites either.)

I just have never been super into the silver/white haired anime guys, plus he does come off a little self centered when you don’t play his route, and he hates cats (which as a extreme cat lover is a actual dealbreaker for me irl). So, I never really gave him the time of day.

So is Zen my type? No, probably not. HOWEVER, I did finally play his route, and I will say after that I do like him a lot more than I used to. Is he my favorite? No. But I actually like him now, and feel bad being mean to him, which never used to be a problem for me before.

I love the development of his and Jumin’s relationship, honestly wish this would happen to them in every route because I love it when we can all be open and get along.

Also his voice actor absolutely amazing. 10/10 great voice. He did an amazing job, I actually looked forward to calling/being called by Zen because he did so great.

Overall, super fun, and I enjoyed it so much more than I ever thought I would. I thought getting through it would suck, and while it was a little cringey to get the good ending, it was overall just such a fun route. So Zen May not be for me, but I see what y’all see in him!

Yoosung’s Route

My baby boy Yoosung. I loved Yoosung in high school and I still love him now. It’s kind of sad that I’m older than him now, but I still love him and his route so freaking much!

Reasons why I’m drawn to/love Yoosung; he’s adorable and I love cute guys, he’s a gamer, he’s more emotional, and he’s overall super relatable. Side note: but those reasons also apply to my husband, so it really is stuff I find attractive in a man.

As a teenager I hadn’t really played World of Warcraft or League of Legends, although I knew of both of them. But since then, I actually have played both which has made Yoosung’s addiction to LOLOL so much more funny and relatable to me, I adore it. I also didn’t notice how much of a masochist and sub Yoosung was when I played as a teen, but as an adult it really smacked me in the face and I found it so amusing whenever it was mentioned so casually in all the routes.

His voice actor also did so good. So many of his calls warmed my heart or made me laugh, even outside his route. I know his voice actor said he was very embarrassed by most of Yoosung’s lines, and I can see why, but I still absolutely adored how he did Yoosung’s voice.

So far with my re-play Yoosung has been my favorite, because I just love him so much and I love his story and development as a character.

Jaehee’s Route

Once again, I did not play her route in high school, simply because I’m not romantically attracted to other women so I didn’t feel like it. Plus, why play that when I could go straight to 707 and Jumin (who I was hardcore crushing on). I knew her route was “platonic”, but again I was a teen and only played a route if I was crushing on the character, so I never played her’s.

This route was honestly the most different from all the ones I’ve played, which makes since as Jaehee is a woman. I honestly didn’t hate this route, I’m glad Jaehee got her freedom and found her own passions. I love that she could embrace her femininity again. Plus it was a little funny watching Jumin self-destruct (I laughed so hard about 707’s car and Jumin).

However, as a Jumin lover, Yoosung lover, 707 lover, cat lover, and “Zen’s okay”-er, I don’t think this route was for me. Mainly because, while I love Jaehee and loved her progress, I don’t feel like we would get along irl. Not because she’s bad, just I don’t think our humor and interests would actually align all that much. I don’t like that she sees Yoosung’s hobby as childish or doesn’t appreciate 707’s jokes, and she also hates cats. So, I just didn’t really vibe with it.

I feel like if you love Zen and/or women, and you maybe don’t like Jumin that much, this route would be perfect for you, but that is not me.

The voice actress was awesome, as they all are. She had a very nice voice that I found strangely calming, and I did actually enjoy the calls a lot. So she did an amazing job.

I love Jaehee, but her route was not meant for me.

Overall Thoughts

I’m sure anyone who reads this has already played of or heard of Mystic Messenger. It came out when I was in high school so it’s not exactly a new game anymore. However, I’ve loved getting to revisit it as an adult. Out of Casual Story Yoosung is still the best for me, but I’m sure he’s not the best of the three for everyone and that’s fine. Just wanted to share some of my thoughts since I replayed it. I’ll be doing the Deep Story route probably in September and October, so I’ll post my revisiting those routes then.

#english otome #mystic messenger #otome #otome game #mysme yoosung #mystic messenger yoosung #mysme zen #mystic messenger zen #mysme jaehee #mystic messenger jaehee #mysme

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bcbdrums · 1 year

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I’m so sorry, I feel like I’m just venting at this point.

I just want to talk about this I think it will help me explain myself in a better way and maybe some of the ask I send you will make more sense?

I think the reason I came to dislike the Kim possible fandom and the ships in general is due to…well, the fandom in itself.

Ron and Kim are my favorite characters.

But I experienced this thing in the fandom where they had this weird mentality:

If Ron was their favorite character it usually meant they didn’t like Kim and the stories that focuses on Ron usually portrayed Kim as bad person just to ship Ron with any other characters, (over-focusing on Kim’s flaws and/or on events like her leaving him in the janitor closet) there were a few exception to this, but even in this kind of stories Kim didn’t felt like Kim at all.

And I’m sorry for mentioning him again, there was this guy, this person. (I’m pretty sure we all know him) They had like 20 accounts to harass people? I don’t even know their name. They would pester anyone in the fandom about Kim/Ron and ugh. It was awful. And… I am saying this as a former KimRon shipper the fandom was a living hell.

That person takes the cake as the worst interaction I’ve had with anyone in any fandom I’ve been in.

But that’s just KimRon what about other ships?

Well, if the person identified with Kim and shipped her with Shego they would usually potray Ron in an awful way, ranging from flandarizing his comedic-relief moments, to portraying him as a bad boyfriend to (in the worst cases) portraying him as full blown abusive person.

The most immediate example I can think of: The current admin of the Kp wiki LoveRobin? Who is a very hardcore Kigo shipper. what happened is that when I first joined the fandom back in 2017 I had a- how do I call it? A “friendly” debate? Even though I could never make her see any of my points, at least she kinda? remained civil about it (for the most part)

It was initially about Drakgo, but then she changed the topic back to Kim and Ron and she randomly ended up comparing Ron to a rapist, and I was like ??????? (It was back in 2017 I was 17, when I stumbled upon the thread and it was so out of the left field) and then that guy found the thread of the conversation somehow and the fight got so bad, and I think it prompted LoveRobin to included stuff into the wiki like “Ron never said “I love you” to Kim” and I think she did this as as a way to, I really don’t know? Retaliat? To attempt to disregard the ship? Maybe? idk.

And that was years ago and I tried to get back into the fandom and it somehow got worse?

I know this is old and everyone probably knows about this at this point, but has anybody read Ron stoppable wiki page recently? Why is it written like that? It’s so needlessly negative and mean spirited towards the character for no reason (I know why it’s written that way, the wiki admin is a hardcore Kigo shipper ) but damn. That’s sooo petty.

This isn’t even the worst part yet That person (the person obsessed with KimRon) started harassing LoveRobin and he escalated things even further and ended up revealing personal information (is that doxxing?) about LR and I was like 😨. And listen at that point I don’t care what you ship or what’s your thoughts on fictional characters/ships are. that kind of behavior is simply terrible, awful, deplorable.

I though this was my main issue: the awful way Kim and Ron were portrayed in the fandom, but then it somehow got worse? Add to all of this the most resent talk about the age difference and that sealed the deal for me. (It’s too much drama and I cannot/will not ship a relationship that consist of an adult and a teenager)

From being neutral about the ship and being open about it I ended up despising it. Kigo became such a Notp for me now, and I can’t even enjoy KimRon as much as I used to because of all the fights and the bad experiences I also had in the fandom.

And all of this interactions killed my enjoyment toward any of those ships. I’m not kidding when I say the Drakgo community was the best and most welcoming out of all the three.

I mean, you're hitting on things I've mentioned in other asks...

The fact of the matter is, there's some historic toxicity in this fandom. Some of it goes on today. Some if it has passed. (And of course it's not isolated to KP; some fandoms have been irreparably destroyed by toxic shipping behavior...)

I've only had a few toxic encounters personally in KP myself. One was right after Graduation first aired. Like many people, I immediately went to read fanfic because I was riding high on fandom excitement. But that is when I discovered...anti-fics. People would write what started out on the surface as a happy, genuine ship fic. And then partway through it would flip and turn into a ship-sinker. Sadly, the first KP fic I ever read was a Kim/Ron ship-sinker deliberate anti-fic. The writer didn't even try to hide it once the surprise turn came halfway through. But it scarred me, and I didn't come back to the fandom until 2019.

As a result, I personally missed out on a LOT of the toxicity. But I've heard tales from those who were there and are still around today... I've experienced a little myself... But yeah.

The fact is, deliberate anti-fics exist. And yes, the wiki is useless because it's controlled by shippers who rather than write fact, editorialize everything to make it seem like their ship is canon.

I wish people would just ship their ships... I'm glad you've found the Drakgo community welcoming! May I recommend as a quality Kim/Ron to re-ignite your passion, Snippets of Forever. And I also suggest looking in the fave section of writers you like on FFn? Usually a good writer faves other good stuff. That's usually how I find anything to read.

#ask answer #kim possible #ron stoppable #shego #drakgo #drakken #kim x ron #kimron #kim/ron #kimxron

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kingtwhiddleston · 1 year

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Ending The Walking Dead

I’m not gonna post anything here until tomorrow, I think, because I want this to stay around for a bit. My blog became a hardcore blog about The Walking Dead and Daryl Dixon. And became a huge part of my daily routine. (This is long, so brace yourselves).

This is for The Walking Dead:

I know I'm two days late, but I wanted to let all you know that I did watch the series finale on Sunday night.

And all I want to say is I'm so grateful.

Thank you, AMC, Robert, Greg (saw your cameo there, buddy), Angela… Scott, for giving us one of the most iconic shows that TV ever had. The Walking Dead wasn't just a show for many of us, and the impact it had on our lives will forever stay within our hearts.

I didn't watch it from the very beginning, actually. I started watching it when season 5 came out. I remember being bored, and I wanted to watch something scary, and The Walking Dead showed up on my TV guide. I had no idea what was going on since it was an episode from S5, so I wasn't familiar with any of the characters that I was watching. I remember clearly being the episode in S5 where Dwight takes Daryl's bike in the burnt woods. So I stopped watching. Back then I didn't had a Netflix acc, so I started watching some episodes on YouTube and I stopped again because the episodes were not complete. About two months later I visited my uncle in the US, and he mentioned TWD to me, told me it was an excellent show and that I should watch it. I told him that I started watching it but stopped because I couldn't find the complete episodes, and so he gave me his Netflix acc (bless him for that).

And I kid you not guys, I finished the 5 seasons in 3 days. I remember sleeping only 3 hours each day and staying up until really high hours in the morning watching this show that was so intoxicating (in a good way). I was obsessed. Quickly I became familiar with each character and I got to pick my favs very quickly (Daryl, duh). I followed with the story and didn't miss a second of it.

Then season 6 came out and in between that break the shows gives us from season to season I got to go deeper with each character. Watch episodes again and just drink them completely.

With everything that happened with Glenn, Abe, etc., many people stopped watching, but I didn't. I had faith in it, and I'm glad I never stopped. I'm the only one out of my friends who never stopped watching, so I got to experience this whole river of emotions alone, specially on Sunday, so they won't understand how I feel.

But I'm so happy and satisfied at how things ended. Everything was perfect.

This series finale, it was truly something that I can describe as bittersweet. I got to see so many of these characters grow and become the better versions of themselves in 7 years… and when it all came to an end, I just couldn't wrap my head around the fact that I will never see them again in new situations and how their lives will continue from this point on.

It's hard to swallow, but everybody got their own happy ending, and everyone got their justice, which surprised me because we all know that that doesn't happen too often with Gimple at hand.

Now, with the major characters, I was so relieved to see them finally at peace with each other and themselves – because there was always something that pulled them back and filled them with guilt and craving revenge. But now I felt how everyone was calm and living their lives as if the apocalypse never happened. That made me incredibly happy.

I never thought that I would cry that hard for Rosita - since she wasn't my favorite at some point, but her character development made me crave her a lot. She was a badass character who just made me admire her and feel for her. So when I saw the bite I felt mad and sad, but Christian decided Rosita's fate and I believe she did it on the whole purpose to give Rosita a peaceful ending. Her acting was amazing beyond words, and she looked more gorgeous than ever. Her relationship with Eugene has to be one of my favorites in the show, honestly. From hating each other to truly love each other as best friends, as family, is something that I'm glad I got to watch and take in. And Eugene made me so proud at how far he has come, his character development has to be one of the bests as well. I know that Rosita and Abraham are damn proud of his friend.

Maggie and Negan were such a good and healing thing to watch. Not only for them, but for us as fans as well. Maggie said it. She can't forgive him and I don't think that we can forgive him either, but he has earned his place and has showed that he has changed, that he is sorry and that he regrets doing what he did. But both of them, specially Maggie wanting to move on and putting the hate away, was incredible to watch. She was so strong and brave and determined that from the second I saw her on S2 I knew she was going to become a huge part of the show. And I'm proud of how far she has come, knowing how much she has suffered.

I hate to say it, but I crave new era Negan. Let's be honest, if it wasn't for him, many people would've been out. He saved Judith, killed Alpha – risking his life in the process, which showed us little by little how he wanted to change and become a better person. Him saying sorry to Maggie is the cherry on top of the cake for me. It was beautiful and meaningful. Just by the look on his face, we know that he was sincere, and it made me sigh in relief knowing that he has become more human. He got to taste a tad of his own medicine kneeling with Annie (Who I love so much – she is so perfect for him) so it is sad to see that it had to go to THAT point for him to understand, but at the end of the day he showed his true vulnerable colors. Honestly, I cannot wait for the Island of the Dead. That show is going to be good.

There were so many references from S1 with Judith connecting to Rick: how her sight got blurry when Daryl was carrying her (Shane taking Rick to the hospital) and how Daryl blocked the entrance of the room with a bed just like Shane did. It was so so so great to see her well and finally telling Daryl about her dad. She might be Shane and Lori's daughter, but she truly is a Grimes girl. She was incredibly brave, specially for a kid her age. She will become such a great leader in the future, not to mention Cailey's acting. That girl is going places.

No so major, but I HAVE to mentioned them because I'm obsessed with them. Princess and Mercer. OH MY GOD. I rooted for them so hard. They are perfect for each other. It was so sweet to see them being happy and having each other's back in this final episode. A lovely couple indeed. Mercer is great as his own person. Great leader and damn handsome, gotta say. Loved his arc and how he chose the community over Pamela, showing that love for his community—which, again, is rare in this how to see that kind of sincerity in someone who is part of an army. A great kind soul, I wished we could've had more of him tbh.

Ezekiel and Gabriel were so great. Got to put their past behind and move forward. Ezekiel ended where he belonged, being governor – a king. And after everything he went through, yet he smiled in the end, doing what he loves.

And Gabriel…wow. Him opening the doors, knowing that he closed them at the beginning of his appearance, was SUCH A GREAT REDEMPTION ARC for him. He loved Rosita deeply, we all could see that, and he knows that he will see her one day. They were a power couple as well, but now he has to take care of Coco. Knowing how he took care of Judith in season 6, I just know that Coco will grow to be a kind yet badass soul, just like her parents. I find it funny, tho, how Coco and Gabriel got the same character story as Judith and Rick. The OG parents died, yet the father, who still stands, adopts her and takes her as his own child. Loved that.

…. Daryl and Carol. There are no words to describe how much I love them to be honest. Whether they would've ended up as lovers, as friends, or if Carol ended up going with Daryl, I'm happy for them. They have gone through so much with each other from the beginning and have created such a strong bond (the strongest on the show). There was a point on the show where, you know, Daryl had a thing for Connie (guys, let's accept it. It was pretty obvious) but so many fans were infuriated with the idea of Daryl not ending with Carol that they forgot to see the main important picture: Daryl happy. I couldn't care less if he ended up with Carol or Connie, I just wanted to see my man happy. I love Connie! And I think she would've been amazing for Daryl. But Carol was the perfect match for Daryl as well. They just connected. But I'm happy at how things ended with those two.

That 'I love you' from Daryl made me BURST into tears. We've never heard him say that before, so him telling Carol he loves her is something incredibly huge. It just shows how much he loves her, and who knows, that “I love you” can be open to interpretation. I loved how in only those three words, we got everything we've wanted for them. Their love and care for each other and how their bond is unbreakable, no matter where they are or what has happened, they always find a way back to each other. I know that Carol will take great care of Judith and RJ and will make them the most incredible kids around. With her manipulative skill onto how to trick the enemy… world watch out.

I would've LOVED to see her go with Daryl, but we all know that is out of our control. I adore Melissa, and I believe her with every fiber of my being when she said it's not the last we will see of Carol. I believe that in the future we will get more of her, so stick to that and hold it really close to your heart because it will happen.

DOG MY BELOVED FINALLY I GET TO SEE HIM UNSCRATCHED AND HEALTHY, I LOVE YOU.

Daryl. It's funny that he was the first character I got to see when I turned the TV to watch it that first time. I remember trying to figure out who was the actor who portrayed him without Google and I said 'It has to be this Norman Reedus guy, it just fits' and I was right! There is so much that I want to say about him…

From becoming a whatever erratic character to the leader and being one of the most soft characters in the show, Daryl captivated me from the start. He has come so so so far, that it makes me immensely proud of who he is now. His transformation was so natural and caring, which is why many people love him. A hard surface hiding the softest inside possible. I think the biggest part of his development, specially this last couple of years, is Judith. He, without a doubt, took care of Judith and RJ. And we got to see him become a father. A guardian to Lydia. Him telling Judith in the softest voice possible that she was going to be fine, made me cry because we've never seen him like this before. SO caring and soft about a person—besides Carol.

Since he was a kid, he had such a hard life. With his father and Merle, his mother missing and the apocalypse happening. Rick and the group are the best thing that has happened to him. And even with his rough past, he never lost something that makes him, him. Loyalty. He has been so loyal to everyone: Maggie, Carol, Rick, Judith. He deserves his happy ending.

I do not know how to feel abt the spinoff. Daryl is happy out there - he was made that clear from the beginning, and there is nothing more loyal than Daryl going out and look for Rick and Michonne, so him leaving the continent? Don't know how that will change him. But up until this finale, his character was incredible.

I just wished he had his peaceful ending as well, or at least a closed cycle. But nonetheless, I love him, and he has become such a great part of my life that I will support him no matter what because he has taught me so much. I admire him as a character and Norman as an actor and person because both of them are so great, so caring and so soft. I truly hope that the spinoff will make him justice and just reunite him with his family. That's all I want for Daryl. To be happy with his family: Rick, Carol, Michonne, Judith and RJ. Have his happy ending surrounded by his loved ones and finding love. He deserves love, no matter who it comes from. I want my man to be happy.

Finally …. Rick and Michonne. But mostly Rick. GUYS, I was not expecting them to show up. I thought that—ever since the spinoff was announced—there would be like a teaser of some sorts where Rick would be shown and explain where he has been. But we got him at the end! With Michonne it is kind of the same story. We already knew what was happening – her going out and looking for Rick (but her armor?! GURL YES. I just know, by the way her armor looked—the producers made it in reference to Okoye I JUST KNOW IT). But yeah, unlike Michonne, we have NO IDEA what Rick has been up to and through for the last 3 years in our universe (about 10 in TWD).

It's around a decade, guys. What has kept him away for so long? He is THE Rick fucking Grimes, like, he would've conquered those who have him trapped ages ago. So we know we are dealing with something or someone major from other people our group has come across with. He looks like he is struggling ngl but that perseverance of looking for his family and writing Michonne letters, who know for how long (daily perhaps) and just not giving up is just Rick Grimes essence right there. And I CANNOT WAIT to see him again. Andy must be so fucking happy to portray him again. I mean, you can see it in those two minutes he brought Rick back as if nothing has happened, and I'm so glad we got him at the end. Rick and Andy, both, are just the breathing essence of the show.

We started with him, and we ended with him, and that made me incredibly satisfied and happy and excited for what's about to come. The universe is expanding, and we are not ready for Rick Grimes yet again.

And something that I am MANIFESTING ON is THAT reunion. We get three different spinoffs. They MUST intertwine with each other at some point. Just think about it for a second. Maggie and Negan somehow go to NY, I think it is. But them being them - the show will probably go around on how to get back to Annie and Herschel in Alexandria and Hilltop, where everyone else resides like Judith and RJ. Then Daryl looking for Rick and Michonne, but going to Paris (wtaf) in the process. But hopefully the show will also center or at least not leave the idea of Daryl going out to find Rick and Michonne and bringing them back to the Common Wealth or Alexandria or Hilltop, where their kids are. And finally Michonne looking for Rick and vice versa but Rick having the problem of escaping those people just to get back to his family—which will happen, at least with Michonne.

CONNECTION. EVERYTHING IS CONNECTED.

Sooo there will be a reunion with the main cast at some point. When will that be? We don't know, and it will take a long ass time for that to happen, but it will. MANIFESTING. All I want as a TWD fan is for everyone to be back together and be happy with each other. That's all I want, it would feel disrespectful for the characters if not. And hopefully it would give that sensation of a cycle finally ending. Because, let's admit it. We are all sad about the show ending, but we are not THAT sad because we know about the spinoffs. I want my family to be happy and together again. Because they are happy now, but still incomplete.

I’ve already read so many comments of un-satisfaction and injustice about this finale that made me mad. People - no matter what - will always complain. There is always something that will not be fit for them. I’m just happy that we got everything we’ve wanted. We got Rick and Michonne back. That should suffice. But again, people will always complain. It makes me sad honestly because they don’t soak up the show the way I did, so they will never appreciate it the way I do. The show is a masterpiece and it ended amazingly. Period.

The Walking Dead has filled me with 7 years of gasps, screams, tears, laughs, distress and love. All I have to say is thank you. Thank you for existing and creating this amazing world, where in a way I felt so safe. That mentally I could go to and feel at ease and share interactions with characters that feel like and are family to me now. Norman, Melissa, Andy, Danai, Lauren, Jeffrey, and everyone else in there, thank you. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you for giving me something so unique. Something that will stay with me forever. Thank you for making me and every other fan feel alive. We are the ones who live. We will forever be The Walking Dead.

#The Walking Dead #Thank you for absolutely everything #The Walking Dead AMC #Rick Grimes #daryl dixon #Michonne #maggie rhee #maggie greene #Carol Peletier #negan #judith grimes #Greg Nicotero #thank you so much #Andrew Lincoln #Norman Reedus #Danai Gurira #lauren cohan #Melissa McBride #Jeffrey Dean Morgan

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souvlakiandcocaine · 29 days

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so like

I haven’t seriously considered the possibility I may have been sexually abused until rlly rlly recently like 2ish yrs ago though it’s entered my mind in passing when I was a teen. It’s just that as far back as I can remember in my sexuality I’ve just been SO horny sorry 4 tmi but like insanely horny 2 the point it was interfering with my life n causing problems. I also never really had normal sexual fantasies like from the very beginning right off the bat it was like hardcore noncon stuff. And this was just in my teen years where I guess it could be explained by too much exposure 2 weird porn n some pretty weird interactions I had w hypersexualized peers (I started kinda “sexually experimenting” around 12-14 which some ppl might consider early). But going even further back when I was a littler kid I remember having dreams/fantasies inclinations w very sadistic/sexual undertones maybe not explicit sex but heavy on the domsub innuendos (especially choking I was obsessed with strangulation for some reason? and vampires). I didn’t really attempt 2 interact sexually with other kids til I was like 12 but yea those kinds of thoughts were always there. Always had a sadomasochistic thing going. when I first “formally” learned about “sex” (which was around age 10ish thru fanfic lol) I remember like deja vu feeling clicked like oh yeeaaah that’s what that is. since then I was just Constantly maladaptively daydreaming abt sex like always. This would make me “burn out” and become sex repulsed so I’d fly between hypersexual feelings and just utter disgust. There was also some other stuff like I had some (albeit very mild but still) uti symptoms that came back and forth throughout my childhood (my 2nd grade teacher sent a note to my mom once abt it cause I took too long in the toilet). I hated teachers/adults I didn’t know touching me in any way it would make me liek prickle all over and I had rlly bad night terrors 4 a bit at ages 6-7 and I would beg my mom to sleep in my room with me cuz I didn’t feel safe but lots of kids have those so idk. I’ve had a lot of issues with anorexia and gender dysphoria which is a big csa survivor symptom I’ve heard. I hated my puberty and sexual development I just wanted to be a child forever but like I wanted 2 be a Sexually Desirable Child?? I also just Hate being touched irl despite how hypersexual I am every time I tolerate it I want 2 throw up every time I make out with some1 specifically I also nearly throw up afterwards. But like there was other non sexual abuse in my childhood and just general disrespect of my boundaries so it could just be leaking into this one area of my life or I could just be using sex 2 soothe myself from other anxieties I honestly dk I don’t want to give myself false memories but some days it just seems so suspicious and it’s not like I have DID or serious memory issues or something so I’d remember right? ☹️ I feel like it would explain a lot honestly but I’m just so lost and confused and thinking about it too much makes me feel like an attention seeking liar

. . . and I’ve done really stupid shit 2 try and figure it out too like I thought maybe if I get violated again the memory will come flooding back so I purposely put myself in a dangerous situation with bad men twiCe once last yr n again this year and got sa-ed and then raped which obviously did nothing for me (and I really can’t complain it was super brief and non violent as far as rapes go I just got fingered without permission on a club dancefloor and the guy left me alone once I froze up). I thought about getting my hands on shrooms and maybe that would do the trick I don’t care if the memory is terrifying I just want to know it’s making me crazy not knowing I need 2 know did it happen yes or no

#my txt #ignore this ignore this ignore this #this is nothing ignore this #this is so dumb #tw csa mention #lilya lore #14 #20 #21 #22

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roguestarsailor · 1 year

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Why did I even come out here for?? I’m literally not having fun. I thought I could be a different person and finally feel like I’m thriving and successful after moving out of my home town and into this new city with new opportunities and experiences. I thought I could find romance out here, I thought I could finally feel like I belong, and I thought I could be this driven creative person but I’m deadass not. I’m quite miserable actually. And the same problems that plague me back home is still with me here. I mean I knew this but it’s very real now and it feels amplified because I’m by myself so often or I’m surrounded by people I WANT to be or wish I could be and I spend too much time in my head. I don’t know if maybe I’m just jet lagged and tired, or I’m not eating well but I am crashing again. Like I am feeling very sad and lonely and heartbroken and unsettled and unsuccessful and confused and I feel like I lack direction and purpose and I feel absolutely hopeless in the romance department and have absolutely nothing else going for me. I thought I found a good group of friends but I still feel like I’m wearing a mask and I feel like I need to run to catch up to them or else they’ll leave me behind. Sometimes it feels like maybe I’m defining friendship wrong? It also makes me sad when I see they clearly have other friends and are doing other things (in separate group chats that I am no apart of). I love that they like doing things but since I’ve been on trip I feel like I’m coming back and missing a million things and I feel left out. I feel physically tired and I want to pump the brakes but I feel like I’m being left behind. I feel like I’m alternating between personalities sometimes and I think I’m going insane. I am not thriving in my job and I hate my title (and reading my performance review it looks like that title isn’t changing anytime soon and my quality of work is actually bad or at least at the level that my stupid title is). I like where I work but I’m no where near where I want to be and it feels like a longer road than I thought and I feel like I’m running out of time. I also can’t dress the way I want because I don’t have anything to justify looking that way; I would feel like a fraud and like a child playing dress up pretending to be confident and commanding and everyone takes my work seriously and it matters and it makes me sad and annoyed. Don’t get me started on my body image. I’m ugly everywhere!!!! And I’m still obsessed over that one guy! For what?? IDK!! I want to get over it and be mature and be realistic but my heart won’t let me. My brain spirals a lot when it comes to him and I’m 2 seconds away from deleting Instagram because his friends posts things that clearly indicate he’s there (his dog every yt person absolutely loves for some reason??) and we just don’t talk enough to care but it’s also wtf? Are we friends at minimum?? I feel so stressed and confused by this. Anyways, I’m fucken miserable. I’m still sick and honestly I’m blowing out every single fluid out my goddamn nose and I am angry at my body about that too. Laying in bed makes me want to cry and all I can do is overthink and over analyze and hardcore fantasize about a better life with a skinny body and wish I had someone to comfort me and make me congee and rub my forehead!! This all makes me feel absolutely terrible!!

#amandathoughts #sad thoughts #this is growing up eh #fucken hate my twenties

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sugawaraxo · 4 years

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COCKWARMING THE PRETTY SETTERS

warnings: definitely smut

characters: tooru oikawa, tobio kageyama, kenma kozume, koshi sugawara

a/n: i’m taking request btw :) my inbox is open. also, this is kinda long so grab your popcorn haha

oikawa

- oikawa is obsessed with you whether he wants to admit it or not

- which is wild because no one would’ve expected him to ever be more obsessed with anyone other than himself

- but here you are

- and he LOVES being around you

- just being in your presence makes him all giddy and smiley

- though he does try to compose himself whenever you guys are around his teammates but usually fails

- he’s not obsessed in a weird or creepy way, but just enough for you to know that he’s all about you and only you

- and you love it

- and of course oikawa’s obsession with you rings no surprise that he’s obsessed with being inside you

- as long as he’s close to his pretty y/n, he’s happy

the two of you had just finished a long and strenuous two rounds of sex and were more than ready for bed. but when oikawa got out of bed to get towels for the two of you to clean up with, you felt extremely empty. you were exhausted, that’s for sure. but a big part of you just wanted him filling you up again, even if nothing else happened. you pout, knowing that your attentive boyfriend would notice when he came back, which he did.

“hm, what’s wrong pretty girl?” he asks softly as he starts to gently clean his mess off of your stomach with a warm towel.

“i want you inside of me again.” you say in an almost whisper, a little embarrassed by the words that just left your mouth and he laughs lightly.

“you’re so cute.” he says as he tucks a piece of hair away from your face and gives you a kiss. “but i’m so tired.” he finishes, then plops down on the bed beside you, big spooning you.

“no, we don’t have to have sex again, i’m exhausted too. i just want you inside me.” you say shyly. you feel his dick twitch behind you and can’t help but smile a little, knowing you’re about to get what you want.

“oh, like cockwarming?” oikawa asks and you nod in response. “hm, ok. yeah, we can do that.” he smiles before kissing your forehead. he was already big spooning you so he was in the perfect position to just slip it in. he pulls down his shorts just enough so that his member could spring free, then pulls the panties that you were wearing under one of his shirts down just enough for him to have access to what he needed. he teases your folds with his tip a little bit, causing you to tense up. then he slowly pushes himself inside you, it not being too difficult with you still being wet from earlier. the two of you moan in unison, both sensitive from your previous interactions. once he’s fully in, he stays there and wraps his arm around your waist as he plants a soft kiss on your shoulder.

“does that feel good? is that ok?” he asks before pressing more soft kisses on your shoulder and your neck.

“it’s perfect.” you coo and he pulls you a little closer with the arm he had slung over your waist.

“goodnight princess.”

“goodnight oikawa.”

- you definitely have morning sex when you wake up

kageyama

- let’s be real here, he really doesn’t know what any kinks are

- he just learns what he likes and what he doesn’t like from you and waits for you to tell him if it’s a kink or not

- you end up having to tell him that basically anything sexual can be a kink after he keeps asking you “is that a kink?” every time you two do something new in bed

- you find his lack of knowledge on the subject adorable though, even though you constantly tease him about it

- he honestly just goes with the flow and follows your lead in terms of sexual things

- not that he’s the submissive one, you just know more about sex so sometimes you have to give him extra guidance

- he doesn’t mind it though, he wouldn’t wanna learn it from anyone else but you

- and you just so happened to teach him his new favorite kink

you two are making out on kageyama’s bed. it starts off innocent at first but slowly progresses into a messier and more heated kiss. you’re on top of him, tugging on his hair while he grips onto your hips. you begin slowly grinding against him causing him to moan softly into your mouth. his sounds were always so pretty and always instantly made your core pulse. you continue grinding on kageyama, giving both yourself and him pleasure. but it isn’t enough. in one swift motion he flips you over so now he’s the one on top. without detaching his lips from yours, he pulls his member out of his pants and lifts up the skirt you’re wearing then slowly pulls down your underwear, revealing your wet core.

“pretty.” he mumbles before licking a teasingly slow and soft stripe up your folds. you moan at the sensation and shut your eyes in pleasure. he continues to please you with his tongue before inserting two fingers into you. it hurts a bit more than usual but you shrug it off because the pleasure outweighs the pain. he continues with this for a few minutes more before he can’t take it anymore and positions himself at your entrance. he slowly begins pushing himself in, but as soon as he’s all the way in, you yelp in pain.

“ow ow ow! stop!” you groan, and kageyama does as told.

“what’s wrong? s-should i take it out?” he asks, concern laced in his voice.

“no no, keep it in just let me adjust to it.” you say. the day before, you and kageyama had some hardcore sex. you had unintentionally somewhat intentionally made him jealous so that he would punish you, and oh that he did. but your poor pussy was suffering the consequences.

“ok princess, i won’t move. just let me know when you’re ready.” he says softly and you smile at his sweetness. he starts kissing you again, this time more deep and passionate as opposed to the sloppy, heated kiss that got you here in the first place. you were slowly beginning to relax around your boyfriend while he was losing his mind trying not to bust inside of you. something about not moving but still being inside you, feeling you around him. the anticipation. it’s driving him crazy.

“oh no, i’m gonna cum.” he says shyly as he pulls away from the kiss and accidentally cums inside of you. he hides his face in the crook of your neck in embarrasment and you just giggle at him, as that isn’t the first time that’s happened.

“is, is that a kink? not doing anything, just being inside you? because i think i have that kink.” he mumbles into your shoulder.

“it is actually, it’s called cockwarming.” you say as you gently stroke his hair, trying to relax your still clearly embarrassed boyfriend.

“hm, well can we never do cockwarming again, that was embarrassing.” he sighs before finally removing his head from the crook of your neck and looking at you.

“i don’t think it was embarrassing baby, i thought it was cute. but if you don’t wanna do it again we don’t have to.” you reassure him and he blushes at your compliment.

“maybe we can do it again sometime then, but for now it’s time to get you cleaned up.” he says before picking you up over his shoulder and taking you to the bathroom.

kenma

- anyone who knows kenma knows that he is always preoccupied with video games

- whenever he’s playing, it’s fairly difficult to get his attention

- as his girlfriend, you’ve somewhat learned to accept this, even though you would like more attention from your boyfriend

- but you take what you can get, knowing that’s just how kenma is and you wouldn’t ever wanna change him

- but sometimes you get needy

- really needy

- and kenma isn’t always the best at reading that

- so you take it upon yourself to get the kind of attention you’re craving from your boyfriend

kenma doesn’t really get flustered too often. but when he does, oh anyone in a ten mile radius can tell. the first time you saw him really get flustered was when he gave you his hoodie while you were out on a date. it had gotten colder than you expected so he gave you his jacket to keep you warm, and as soon as you put it on, the boy went red. he couldn’t even form coherent sentences at first and you thought it was the most hilariously adorable thing ever. ever since that day, you’ve worn his clothes whenever you wanted his attention; hoodies, sweatshirts, t-shirts, you name it. today is one of those days. kenma has been gaming all day in some sort of tournament and you’re beginning to get frustrated because of how badly you’re craving his touch, so you pull out the big guns. you put on one of his favorite hoodies, one that you’ve never worn before, and head into his gaming room. he’s sitting is his gaming chair deep in concentration, shooting at someone and talking to who you assume is kuroo on his headset. he doesn’t even notice you at first until you come sit in his lap, your legs resting on either side of his as you lay your head on his shoulder.

“hi kitten.” he whispers away from his mic before placing a gentle kiss on your lips and you hum in response. you played with the hair at the nape of his neck for a little bit before your overwhelming feeling of neediness comes back. you lift your head from kenma’s shoulder, now somewhat blocking his view of his computer screen.

‘i want to feel you inside me’ you mouth to him. he hadn’t even realized what you were wearing until right then, and his cheeks blush bright red. he places a finger under your chin and uses it to pull you in for a kiss. “go for it.” he whispers to you as he pulls away, reverting his attention back to his game that he had forgotten about for a quick second. you easily slip his member out of the sweats he’s wearing and give it a few strokes to get him hard. you were wearing absolutely nothing under his hoodie in hopes that this would be the outcome, and when he notices that as he glances from you back to his computer screen every so often, he mumbles

“dirty little kitten, this is exactly what you wanted hm?”

“mhmm” you respond and he smiles.

you continue what you’re doing and position kenma’s tip at your hole before slowly sinking down on it. your breath hitches at the feeling of being filled up, while kenma clenches his eyes shut and bites his lip in order to hold back his moans. once he’s fully inside you, you lay your head on his shoulder again and just stay there.

“hm, that’s it? you just wanna cockwarm me?” kenma asks curiously.

“mhmm. just wanted to feel you inside me, that’s it.” you say sleepily, slowly drifting as you shut your eyes.

kenma can’t help but smile, “you’re adorable.” he says before planting a kiss on your cheek. you smile a small smile in return before dozing off on kenma’s shoulder, him still buried deep inside you.

every so often you would move around in your sleep and kenma would have to bite his lip to hold back a moan so the friends he was playing with wouldn’t hear, but it was worth the risk because he loves just being this close to you, and you do too.

sugawara

- suga’s high sex drive really surprised you when you two first started dating

- his kinkiness surprised you too

- you thought he would always be very gentle and vanilla

- but you were very mistaken

- not that you’re complaining though

- he’s always open to trying new things

- so when you bring up the topic of cockwarming, he’s intrigued

“is that something you wanna try bunny?” he asks after you finish explaining to him what exactly cockwarming is.

“we don’t have to if you don’t want to, i just think it’d be interesting to try.” you shrug

“i agree.” he says, before leaning over to start kissing your neck. that’s your weak spot, so you take this as suga saying he wants to try right now. the two of you are currently on the couch, in the middle of watching a romcom but clearly that romcom has been forgotten as suga continues to make little love bites on your neck. you lift his chin to kiss him because you know if you don’t stop him now, he’ll cover your whole body in hickies. the kiss is soft, but passionate and you can feel yourself quite literally melting into it. somehow you end up straddling suga, still lost in the kiss. you suddenly notice a pair of familiar fingers making their way down to your most sensitive area. he teases you, rubbing his fingers over your pajama shorts, knowing you’re getting needy because of the way you’re starting to softly moan into his mouth. he takes this as a sign of you wanting more and breaks away from the kiss so he can take off your shorts and your underwear, with a little bit of help from you. once your bottom half is completely naked, he grins and begins kissing you again. the sensation of your bare core against suga’s sweatpants was teasing you, so you began moving your hips to get some friction. suga moans a little at your sudden movements and you can feel him getting harder. he pushes you up off of him slightly so that he can pull his sweats down, them ending up just hanging around his ankles. now both of your bottom halves are naked, and you’re staring at each other in anticipation.

“sit on it bunny.” suga instructs and you follow his orders, sitting down on his length and feeling every inch against your walls. that feeling when he first inserts into you will never get old.

“mm, suga.” you moan. he instinctively thrusts after hearing your pretty noises, completely forgetting what you guys were supposed to be trying.

“no, don’t move.” you laugh at him and he blushes apologetically.

“sorry, i couldn’t help it. you’re just so pretty.” he apologizes and you melt.

“it’s ok suga, you’re adorable.” you smile. “i’m gonna turn around now, but keep you inside me and we’ll finish the movie just like this, yeah?” you say.

“yeah.” he nods in agreement. without pulling suga out of you, you turn so that you’re no longer straddling him but sitting in his lap with your back facing towards him, your face now facing the tv. you guys finish the rest of the movie exactly like this, you sitting on suga’s lap with his member deep inside of you and suga occasionally thrusting up into you just to get your reaction.

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