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seth-burroughs · 2 months

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my response.

[longest recorded sigh known to man] Hi. [sniffs, briefly looks at the floor, then back into your fucking soul] I... [takes out and uncaps a a half-frozen żywiec zdrój water bottle making sure the logo and brand name is visible, cranes neck backwards and gulps down the entire thing in under 10 seconds] [coughs and sniffs again] As you can not see I've been crying... A little, I didn't do my make-up didn't do... My hair's a bit messy . I've... I'm trying to- write this, in the most humble corner At my 5 billion złotych villa I could find, I'm... On the floor right now, this is my basement, so- [smiles weakly, sighs. expression turns serious] This is different from my usual content. I... Really didn't want to make this post, but... Recent events have- This... Is the hardest post I've ever made. I've got a lot of hate recently and, it has affected my mental health.

I know I'm gonna get a lot of hate for this.... [sigh]..... Recent events have come to light in which- accusations- have... [takes out another water bottle, downs it's entirety in under 9 seconds] [sobs] It has come to light my, my identity as a... Yomi Hellsmile.... Fictionkin in the Rain Code fandom on tumblr. And and- I know that this... Came across as- shock, to all seven of you. This post serves as me adressing a few things, to paint a clearer picture of this whole situation. I... [sigh] I have realized I made a severe and continuous lapse, in my judgment, during the 5 years of which I served as the director of the peacekeepers in the Ward. [sigh] I just... let it get to me man, you know, the immense power granted by the capitalism gods there, but, nobody's perfect, i'm only huma- [stops] [audible gulp] 3 years. 3 years served as the director.

Due to my.... [starts petting my cat] past transgressions and problematic qualities, I've been facing... great mistrust and scrutiny, from the tumble kinmunity, but maybe I deserve it. [sniffs] [takes out another water bottle, downs it's entirety in under 8 seconds] [exhales] I am aware of my sins I've committed by the virtue of being a nasty abhorrent piece of shit villainkin, consciously, voluntarily and actively, despite not having- [flinches as the guy forcing me to write this post tightens his finger on the trigger, a clear warning] I mean, I am aware of my sins and am actively repenting, right now and my whole life from now on. Ok? Ok. [long sigh]

I have had it revealed to me, during my toluene huffing induced out of body experience yesterday, that I cannot be allowed to- exist in this world, nor be recognized by the council as valid, have I not feel guilt and shame constantly for the atrocities I've definitely committed in this life. And I now realize, how insensitive of me was to even list it, talk about it in any way or let it affect me and my life. [takes out another water bottle, lets it flow freely down my thrussy straight into my stomach, finishes absorbing it in under 7 seconds] [wheezes] I did not regret all of my actions hard enough, and for that, I need to simply accept the consequences of my past actions, and I hope you never forgive me. [sigh]

I've let you guys down. For- clearly not taking the obvious choice to simply hide or repress my kintype, or just, stop being kinning them. Just stop kinning them lol. Just stop it, since it's a choice and completely voluntary, and keeping that makes me a bit sus...... so I've been told. And for that, I am so fucking sorry. I'm on my knees right now begging for forgiveness and hoping that you'd kick my frail body for the audacity. [sigh] But.... I wanted to adress my side of the story, too, in this post. This is by no means an attempt at justifying my actions, this segment only serves as an explanation, as to how I saw- to better understand- that if you see how I saw things personally, you'll take pity and maybe, just maybe I'm not saying- believe- nevermind.............

[pauses. hesistates. takes out another water bottle and drinks it all under 6 seconds] [throws the emptied bottle behind me, hitting one of the hostages in his giant forehead, making a thwack sound] I don't remember much, but from what I can make out, I was in a very dark place at that time, when- when everything happened. [sigh] I failed torture college long before and never quite recovered, I've been struggling with my mental health, my boytoy hitman whom I won't name to conceal his identity and definitely not because I forgot, fucking died, all my employees were assholes, m*ske.d fr3a//k, and um- think of something, you're forgetting something, uhhh, fuck..... So you see- oh. There was also the... woman flesh cube incident, which, was what I ordered in a private moment, which should have never become public in the first place. I've already reached out to the victim and we're together aiming to resolve things peacefully. I think. She hasn't called me back. Well, anyway.

Now that we established this- I would like to apologize for executing Seth via firing squad that april. I had no idea he was queer and neurodivergent, had I known sooner I would not be this harsh with him, ever. I would also like to apologize for knocking out like, 2... [sigh] or 3.... of my employees that one day, I was under a lot of stress and pressure in that moment, and it just built up until I lashed out in a very destructive way. [sigh] In my defense, literal terrorists were blowing up my city and I was literally in the process of nearly arresting one of them. I will also apologize for kicking that one guy's body repeatedly, I would say, about.... 38 times, that time, and for that, um... he literally killed someone so I can do what I want actually, and I really- I don't really, remem- but I recognize some of you won't see it that way, and I'm sorry that- that's how you feel. And I apologize for also hitting that guy's neurodivergent boyfriend(?) with the whip later, I was under a lot of emotions still, and I was trying to make myself look more foxy to my subordinates present. But most of all, I would like to apologize for developing sexual feelings towards my shitty boss and arch enemy, m*k0t0 kag//uts/uch1. I did not realize he was minor-coded the whole time

[takes out another water bottle, sucks it dry in under 3 seconds] [meows] so :3 [sigh] no, sorry. I am so sorry, for everyone involved. But please understand, that I had grown and changed a lot since then, and am no longer that person. I mean that literally. I-Im really n- [a hostage gets shot for that implication] [stops] I mean, I want to grow and change from this moment and put the drama behind me- or not behind me really, I know I can never never truly atone for the atrocities. You know, I hope to be forgiven, personally, but if that won't end up happening, I will accept my due punishment to be brought out to public and flogged until I confess my sins and then, oh fuck, roughly manhandled and thrown down to the ground to get stomped on for being a ba- [professional editor's note: the following 6 paragraphs of the post have been deleted for a purely technical reasons]

[takes out another water bottle. it dematerializes in my hand.] [starts fake crying] I j-just... That was all I wanted to say. [sigh] I'm gonna upload this post unedited. [sigh] Before I finish this post, [sigh] I would like to announce that I [sigh] will be personally donating 50 groszy to charity, [sigh] in order to atone. [sigh] Please do not harass any of the people involved. [sigh] I hope you understand... [sigh] Now let us move forward. [sigh]

.........................................................................?

#mine #rain code #yomi hellsmile #shitpost tag #fictionkin #inspired by.... nvm those who get it get it. yeah.

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starlit-dreaming · 7 months

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when honestly you can't recall (Baxter Ward/MC) p2

Rating: M

Romantic Ships: Baxter Ward/Original Character(s); Derek Suárez/Leandra “Lee” Last

Platonic Ships: Main Character | Jamie Last & Leandra “Lee” Last, Main Character | Jamie Last & Original Character(s)

Tags: Unplanned Pregnancy, Single Parent, Angst w/a Happy Ending

TL;DR: A self-indulgent Single Parent AU. Lee has a better relationship with my MC compared to Liz. I wrote this when the Baxter DLC was still in beta, so I opted to avoid writing spoilers (for now) and to avoid rewriting moments of the Jude/Scott wedding.

A/N: Cross-Posted on AO3 under the same title (@ Starlit_Dreaming). There's gonna be more fluff in the next chapter, but I've also written like... 5% of the next chapter, and I've only been able to finish due to having free time in the last few weeks.

Obligatory Tag: @arcosoffireheart

Links: 1 | [2] | 3 | 4

Summary:

Everyone assumes that Gabby is exactly like her mother, but Rosaline will always see the traces of her daughter’s father. The shape of her eyes, how fussy she gets if there’s even a hint of conflict, every moment her daughter is calm and serene in her arms, the sweet and gentle smiles.

Her daughter does not have her black hair, either. Wavy hair, yes, but it was not fully black and her father has only ever dyed his hair.

It’s a miracle that nobody notices their similarities.

Including Baxter himself.

// In which Rosaline ends up becoming a single mother in the aftermath of her and Baxter’s summer fling. Some things change. Some things don’t.

——————————————————————

Part 2: i don't care (it's taking me apart)

——————————————————————

Then

Mid-Summer

Step 3: Age 18

———————————

“It’s… I don’t know. A frightening situation?”

It felt wrong hearing those words coming from Rosaline of all people. Throughout their childhood, she was always taking things in stride and going with the flow. No matter how scared or anxious she would get, she would always pull herself together and stand tall. Maybe it had to do with Cove, who always relied on her as a shoulder to lean on.

Cove was precious, there was no doubt about that, but Rosa tried so hard to stand tall for his sake that it’s hard for her to rely on him in the same way.

And that’s where Lee came in.

There were some matters that were easier to share between Rosa and Cove, but things like this were easier to share between Rosa and Lee. Lee was Rosa’s shoulder to lean on, the person she cried to. And still, it feels wrong hearing those words coming from her cousin. Her cousin deserved to be happy, to smile without a care in the world.

“Why’s that?” Lee asked, tilting her head back to look at Rosaline, who was sitting on the monkey bars and letting her feet kick back and forth.

They were both honestly too big to be using the park — it used to feel like such a huge place when they were kids, but not any more. Rosaline stares off at the sunset, and Lee simply leans her back against the ladder, watching her cousin.

What a solemn look — it didn’t suit Rosaline at all.

“I’ve only been dating Baxter for two months now,” Rosaline stated. “The honeymoon phase wore off, but… I’m still really into him. Like, thinking about a future, getting married one day, that type of seriousness. It’s just… kinda scary to me. I’ve never felt this way about someone before.”

“That’s a good thing, isn’t it? Since you’re dating. You’re not the kind of person to date casually to begin with.”

Not that anyone actually knew that. Lee was the one Rosaline talked to when it came to anything romance-related, and sure, she might’ve mentioned something to Cove, but he wasn’t too interested. Probably on the ace spectrum, if she really wanted to make a guess.

Granted, Rosaline often broke things off with her exes within a month of dating. Either red flags that Lee noticed or because of incompatibility — most of those red flags being some who tried getting her number, despite dating Rosa, and Rosa promptly gave them the boot the second Lee said something. The fact that Baxter never asked Lee for her number when they met on the little boat trip was already a pretty good indication that he’s not interested in getting into somebody’s pants and dipping out after.

In fact, Lee was pretty confident that Baxter was equally head over heels for Rosaline. Is he just not communicating that to her?

“Yeah, that’s true, but still,” Rosaline sighed, wryly smiling. “I get jealous thinking that he’ll find you or somebody else prettier, even when I know that his eyes are almost always on me. I get all insecure, wondering if I’m good enough for him, or wondering when we’ll be breaking up because he finds someone new. What if we can’t handle long-distance? What if he loses interest in me? I just want to hog all his attention.”

“If he’s the type to break up with you because of something like that, then he’s definitely not worth your time and affections, but I don’t think you have to worry about that,” Lee stated rather confidently, moving to stand in front of Rosaline. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you, Rosa. There’s no way he’ll break up with you for those kinds of reasons. He’s nothing like your exes.”

“…You really think so?”

“I know so,” Lee grinned, reaching to hold her cousin’s hand and giving it a comforting squeeze. “You’re both absolutely smitten with each other. It’s a bummer that Derek won’t be back before summer ends. We could’ve gone on a double date!”

“Yeah,” Rosaline smiled softly. “Maybe next year, unless Baxter has a chance to come back sooner.”

“For you? I think he’d do whatever he can to make you happy.”

———————————

Then

Early Spring

In-Between Steps 3 & 4: Age 19

———————————

“For you, I think she would’ve done anything to make you happy,” Carol murmured softly.

They both stood on the porch, an old envelope in Carol’s hands as she took her hat off, curly grey and white hair revealing itself as she held the hat over her chest. She seemed to be doing some sort of silent prayer, as she looked at Rosaline with a distant look in her blue eyes.

Eventually, she smiled, something sad and soft and gentle as she puts her hat back on and hands her the envelope. “I suppose it isn’t so terrible, in the end. You grew up happy and healthy, Rosaline, something that we all had hoped for,” she said with crinkled eyes. “And while it’s not how she envisioned it, the house is yours.”

“…thank you,” Rosaline awkwardly said, gently taking the letter into her hands. “For coming out here with me. For not selling the house and everything that belonged to… my birth mother.”

“Oh, don’t go thanking me for a silly thing like that,” Carol lightly laughed, waving her off as she approaches the front door, digging through her purse for the key. “Val was like a second daughter to me, and even without renting this house, I make enough money to keep this place. Coming here and showing you the house would be better than leaving you here to handle it on your own.”

“…you mentioned earlier that you stopped renting the house…?” Rosaline questioned as the door opens, and Carol steps aside, gesturing Rosaline to walk inside first. Wordlessly, she enters.

What greets her is a home with cream-coloured walls that appear to be freshly painted over and a stairway with a child gate at the top and bottom. On her left is a small carpet area with bean bags and two regular-sized bookshelves — one filled with minimal and minor decor, and the other half-empty and half-filled with books as if waiting for the next renter to fill in the empty spaces. The right of the stairs shows a short hallway with a door to the garage, and at the end of the hall is an open door, leading through a laundry room which also leads into a bedroom from what she could tell.

“Yeah,” Carol said. “You had just turned 18 when I stopped renting the house to people. All of my renters here were single parents who needed a place until they could find their footing, and the last renter’s lease only finished up recently.”

Rosaline walks towards the bookshelves as Carol closes the door and puts her keys away.

“It’s up to you if you still want to keep that sort of thing up with this house, but I imagine it’d come in handy for your current situation.”

Upon closer inspection of the books, Rosa noticed that on the bottom shelf was an assortment of children’s books. Half appeared to be brand new, and she suspects that it has to do with the fact that actual children had grown up in this house thanks to Carol’s past renters, and Carol’s renters had gone out of their way to buy new ones.

In contrast to the bottom shelf, was the top to middle shelf where an adult would have a much easier time to grab and go. Some books on the top shelf were old and worn, gently gone through multiple times in many years, yet still well-maintained. There was a book of names, with pages marked with pieces of paper that stuck out from between the pages. But most notably were the self-help books, the cookbooks for beginners, recipes to sneak in vegetables for picky eaters, basic first aid, and many more.

This bookshelf was curated to best help a first-time parent, and that fact was evident with how many books didn’t look brand new.

“I… am really sorry. For not talking to you about Valerie back then. You look so much like her, but you’re an awful lot like your moms,” Carol said, walking over and standing beside Rosaline. “I couldn’t bring myself to properly meet you back then. I lost both of my daughters and just couldn’t let go of my grief. Valerie, who died in an accident, and Veronica, who died in childbirth.”

“I see… I’m sorry that I can’t really understand how you feel.”

“Nonsense. Yes, you do look like Valerie, and who knows, maybe you’ll share similarities with her, but you take after your mom and mother. I can see that you have such a light-hearted and joyful approach to life just like Pamela, and you are a sympathetic and comforting sort of soul like Noelani.”

“…what was she like?”

“Valerie was an orphan who started working part-time as a receptionist at Lacework Lenders. She didn’t have anyone else, just me and the others, but she and Veronica were sisters in everything but paperwork. No boyfriend or husband either — her ex ran off the second he found out that she was pregnant, but Val was very stubborn. Nothing stopped her from wanting to keep you and have a family of her own.”

She tried not to feel guilty over a woman that she might never consider as anything more than a birth mother.

“What happened to her?”

“A car accident,” Carol shook her head. “I don’t know all the details, but you were born early, and she was alive long enough to give you a name. Nobody knew your father, so we couldn’t contact him, we couldn’t do anything about him, really. I don’t think Val wanted him to know about you, either.”

“Well, that’s fine. I’m not interested in finding a father figure — I already have two in my life.”

Gregorio Suárez and Cliff Holden were the only dads in her life, and she didn’t care to find someone who never wanted the title to begin with. Men who didn’t want to own up to the consequences of their actions weren’t worth an ounce of her time, anyway.

“Good,” Carol nodded, pretty much agreeing with the unspoken thought. “Past this room and the stairs is the kitchen. My daughters worked on redesigning it to be a spacious kitchen — unfortunately it’s also been baby proofed, so some things might be difficult to open.”

Rosaline nodded along as they moved into the kitchen. The edges of the counters all had edge guards, making it less likely for children to get hurt from it. That… was actually fairly smart. She never considered doing that with counters, so it really was a good choice for her to come see the house. If she doesn’t move in, she’ll keep that in mind the next time she shops for her future baby.

Past the kitchen and dining area was a wide living room with carpeting and an L-shaped sofa set. There was a TV mounted above an electric fireplace, with an empty toy box in the corner.

“You’ll have to buy the toys yourself for your child,” Carol said. “The children of the previous renters often took the toys with them, but they usually buy some starting toys for the next renters. The previous renters did buy you a few baby blankets, though.”

“They left me stuff…?” Rosaline blinked.

“It’s only polite that they did,” Carol smiled at her warmly. “They went through similar problems like you, and a small bit of kindness can go a long way. They wanted to help you in a way that they were able to, just as the previous renters have done for them. You’d still have to buy some things of your own, of course, like milk formula and baby wipes. Val’s things were left untouched in the back shed, but we can go over that later since we’re just here to look at the house today. I know that it can be… a lot.”

It felt… strange. Despite the fact that there were renters before her, everything about this house just seemed to be done for her and her birth mother the more she looked around.

But her birth mother never had the chance.

The idea of using it for herself just felt unsettling. It felt wrong, as if she was stomping on her birth mother’s dreams.

“Why don’t you have a seat on the sofa and I fix us up with some water, hmm?” Carol kindly smiled, gently placing a hand on Rosaline’s shoulder as she guided her over to the sofa, sitting her done. “And don’t go feeling sorry for Valerie. She would’ve been furious that I didn’t come help you in your time of need. I think it would let her rest easy, too, knowing that her own preparations would help out not just strangers in a similar situation, but also help you out with your own child.”

Rosaline rubbed her eyes, her other hand resting on her swollen belly as Carol wordlessly walked towards the kitchen, getting them both a glass of water.

Once, when she and Liz talked about their birth parents, she told her that she didn’t understand. Because the life she lived is hers, and that she could never imagine anything else. She loves her moms so much, and the idea of having different parents from childhood was unthinkable. The very idea of never being Cove’s neighbour hurts too much, the idea of never knowing the people in her life now.

And yet, this house was proof of a life that could’ve been, but never was. She could’ve been an only child, she could’ve been in a family of two. Maybe she would’ve acted like Derek had once thought she would when Father’s Day came around, maybe Father's Day would’ve become a sore topic of conversation.

Living here, she would’ve gone to the same school as Lee and Derek, she would’ve known them, but would she have been just as good friends with them? Maybe, maybe not.

(Would she have met Baxter, still?)

But here she is now, with all of that being only what-ifs.

“Do you have a name for them?” Carol asked, placing the cups of water onto the table and handing Rosa a packet of tissues from her purse.

“Gregory for a boy, Gabrielle for a girl,” Rosaline sniffed, taking the packet of tissues. “Gray or Gabby for nicknames. Maybe Greg or Brielle — I’m not sure which nickname to use. I just… their father doesn’t know, and I want him to see this child and understand that they are a symbol of the love we shared.”

She was being sentimental, and she was just thankful that everyone thought that she was just naming her child after Gregorio. It was dumb, and maybe she’d cringe in a normal situation, because Baxter had the whole black and white theme, and already she thought of their child as gray.

“Those are good names,” Carol smiled kindly, rubbing her back reassuringly. “And if he has an ounce of love for you, he’ll grow to care for your unborn child, if he ever meets them.”

“…would… Valerie really be okay with this?” With me, goes unsaid.

“Positive.”

———————————

Then

Mid-Autumn

Step 3: Age 18

———————————

“…positive.”

Rosaline let out a shaky breath, looking at the test before tossing it into the small wastebasket.

Her purple eyes stared off into space, lost in her thoughts. And when she turns to look at Lee, standing at the doorway of the bathroom, she looked as if she were looking for something. For someone. She hugs herself, looking small and even more fragile than she’s ever been.

And Lee knows that it’s not her who Rosaline is looking for, but she’s here, nevertheless. She’s the only one who’s here for her right now.

So, she does the only thing that she can do. Lee hugs her, warm and careful as if Rosaline were precious. She rubs her cousin’s back, hoping to give her as much comfort that she was willing to accept at this moment.

“Whatever you decide, I’m here for you.”

Rosaline doesn’t need assurance for anyone else. Lee knows her cousin, and she knows that Rosaline needs her assurance, because she’s here, she’s here and everyone else isn’t because of various reasons outside of her control. She’ll need their individual reassurances later, but Lee doesn’t need to wait to voice her own.

And then, Rosaline relaxes her tense shoulders, returning the hug tightly. Her eyes were watering, Lee noticed, and soon, it dampens the shoulder of her shirt where Rosaline laid her head against.

“I… I want to keep it.”

And unlike everyone else who would ask and showcase their disbelief, Lee nods, accepting it without question, “Okay.”

Because she knows better than anyone how much Rosaline gets stuck in her own head. She must’ve thought it over hundreds of times before the confirmation, before telling Lee, before asking her to be here tonight.

“And… I… I want you to be their godmother.”

“Of course,” she nods, knowing that she was going to be the godmother from the very start. Liz might feel hurt by that fact, but Liz also wasn’t always there for Rosaline throughout their lives. Lee was. Lee always was. “We’ll love and support you,” she adds, before Rosaline starts panicking over reactions next.

Everyone will spoil Rosaline’s unborn child, she just knows it.

Rosaline sniffed, eyes watering. “Will… will you be there…? When I—when I talk to my moms?”

“Always.”

———————————

Two Months Ago

Beginning of Summer

Step 4: Age 23

———————————

“Always,” Lee murmured, eyes glimmering with unshed tears in the dazzling lights.

Her gaze never leaves Derek’s as she speaks into the microphone, phone in hand as she says her vows. “Somehow, some way, fate brought us here today. When we reunited in high school of our sophomore year, after losing contact for that previous year due to conflicting schedules and busy lives, I thought it was a miracle that we managed to pick our friendship up right where we left it. When you had that summer training camp in the year after our graduation, our relationship was tested by distance when we decided to become more than friends. When you had to move to a different city for college, I stayed local, and still I wanted to be with you. Despite the distance, I knew that you were the one for me.”

Cove was definitely crying among all of Derek’s grooms men, as evident when one of Derek’s brothers grins, quietly giving him a packet of tissues. Rosaline just smiled softly at the scene before her among Lee’s bridesmaids. Her maid of honour, naturally.

“When you asked me to move in with you, I was excited — I wanted to fall asleep in your arms and wake up to your smile, and that’s how I knew that I was and still am head over heels for you, after all of our time being together.”

Derek started to tear up, holding her free hand as he stared at her as if she hung the stars in the night sky.

“I love you, so much more than what words can describe, and I swear to you that I will always love you. I’ll hold your hand through the good and bad, I’ll love you for who you are now and who you have yet to be, and I’ll stay with you, side by side, no matter the challenges that may come our way.”

She slips her phone into the pocket of her wedding dress, seamlessly hidden, a detail that Rosaline included in the design.

“I love you, Derek Suárez, and I can’t wait to build our future together.”

———————————

~1 Year Ago

Mid-Summer

In-Between Steps 3 & 4: Age 22

———————————

“…and I can’t wait to build our future together,” Lee read, eyes trained on her phone screen as she squinted at the screen.

Rosaline stared at her sketchbook, sketching potential design patterns. They’re in Rosaline’s living room, with her sitting at the dining table sketching out potential designs for the dresses.

“Well?” Lee prompted, looking up at her cousin from her spot on the L-shaped sofa. “What do you think?”

“I think you’ve been rereading your vows a little too much,” Rosaline sighed, smiling wryly at Lee as she placed her pencil down. “It’s perfectly fine. You talked about your relationship, that you’ll both overcome the challenges together, and that you love him. Add more, and it’ll be a long presentation-level speech. Cut it too much, and it’ll be incredibly short for a vow. I think it’s fine the way it is, especially because it’s your feelings for him.”

“Mm…” Lee frowned, looking unconvinced. And nervous, Rosaline noticed. “And… it’s okay? You really think so?”

“Why would I think otherwise?” Rosaline raised a brow, picking her pencil up again to draw a purse. “Do you want your purse to match your reception dress? Or should I make it be a pop of colour like a flower bouquet, so it stands out?”

“Matching. I want people to see the dresses I wear and be wowed instead of focusing on my purse, and if I want the purse to stand out, I’ll just use it with a different outfit,” Lee leaned back into the sofa, frowning. “And I… that’s not what I meant, I mean,” she groaned, flopping down, lying around as she looked at her, almost guiltily. “You know I love you, right?”

“Uh, yeah? Where are you going with this?” Rosaline smiled, feeling downright confused.

“How uh… how are you and Baxter doing?”

Oh. It was then that Rosaline realized what Lee was getting at. The wedding is meant to be a heartfelt occasion, filled with happy tears and bright smiles all around. And here Lee was, concerned for Rosaline and Baxter, who both broke up because Baxter refused to try a long distance relationship.

And Lee was especially worried about hitting on a nerve with that speech.

Well, she admits that she’s a bit… sad that Baxter wasn’t willing to have an LDR like Lee and Derek, but she feels vindicated knowing that he’s now working for a couple that he expected to have broken up. It evened out on that front, and frankly the petty side of her thinks that Lee ought to emphasize that distance meant nothing to a couple who worked together.

Although Baxter had yet to ask her about Gabrielle. A fact that enrages her more than upsets her, but she understood why he feigns indifference.

Not everyone wanted to tackle the hurdles of parenthood.

“Nothing new,” she simply said. Honestly, Baxter was the same as ever. Only he of all people could confidently keep her at arms length even when they were technically in contact. “Apart from the group chat, he doesn’t directly text me. Assuming that he still has my number.”

And what did she expect? For him to step up, to talk to her about Gabrielle after he saw her for the first time? Did he even want to see the child beyond that initial first meeting?

“Not even about…?”

“Nope, but that’s okay,” Rosaline smiled. It did hurt, but Rosaline could deal with it. Her birth mother and her had shit taste in men judging from what she knew from Carol. “Besides, I don’t think Gabby cares about not having a dad. She’s already getting spoiled rotten by everybody, and seriously, it’s a bit funny.”

Lee barks out a laugh at that, “That’s true! Gabby practically has four grandmas and two grandpas, several uncles, and several aunties. Has Liz been gifting her more presents?”

“Mhmm, but Brielle still loves you and your pink hair more than she loves Liz, but that’s a secret,” Rosaline teasingly stated before humming much more thoughtfully to herself. “Honestly, worse comes to worst, I can always ask Cove if he’s fine with doing that whole second parent adoption thing, if she really wants a dad. Cove’s a sucker for her anyway, so he would cry happily if that happened, even if he’s never thought of it.”

“True, he really takes good care of her,” Lee smiled. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you two were a thing.”

“Maybe in another life,” she laughed. “But Cove’s definitely my brother.”

———————————

Then

Beginning of Summer

Step 3: Age 18

———————————

“Cove’s definitely my brother,” Rosaline laughed.

“That’s reassuring,” Baxter commented, smiling as they strolled through the boardwalk. “And here I thought that perhaps he was your first love.”

She doesn’t miss a step, her smile remains, as she watches Baxter from the corner of her eyes. But her heart skips a beat, her gut freezes, her mind reeling with imposing thoughts. Why would he say that? Naturally, there’s only one reason as to why he’d wonder, and why he’d look at her with incredible interest.

Her first love is Baxter Ward, back when she only knew him as the enchanting boy who swept her off her feet. That was an undeniable fact.

Rosaline, however, doesn’t admit it.

“Nope, that honour belongs to Mr Cliff Holden, Cove’s father!”

It wasn’t a lie, technically. She did think that Cove’s father was cute, but not to a point where she was romantically interested. The idea of it was plain weird, and she and Lee both got a kick out of it when she mentioned it, meanwhile Cove was mortified that she ever thought of his father as “cute” and “attractive”.

Cove was even more horrified (which she never thought was possible) when she told him that his mother was super cute, because she actually did develop a minor crush on Kyra back then. Now she’s just “mom three” to her. She’s not afraid to admit that someone’s attractive, but it’s a rather fun embarrassment, one that only gets mentioned as a tease from Lee, when it’s just her and her cousin, since Cove prefers to forget it entirely.

He had smiled, at first, in disbelief, before cackling at it, grinning when she mentioned Cove’s reaction to her minor childhood infatuation. Afterwards, Baxter was laughing, a reaction that she both expected and wanted. The tale is a fun exaggeration, and it safely tucks away the fact of her first love.

After all, it’s a bit much to confess to your first love, especially one you still had affections for.

Still, he was absolutely adorable…

———————————

~1 Year Ago

Mid-Summer

In-Between Steps 3 & 4: Age 22

———————————

“She’s rather adorable,” Baxter absentmindedly comments.

Rosaline blinks, glancing over at him, but his eyes remain on the road. She thinks, for a moment, before realizing that maybe he finally wants to talk about Gabrielle.

“Yeah, Brielle is the cutest person in my life,” she smiled, thinking of her daughter.

“I would’ve expected her to come along, to be truthful.” It’s just small talk, but he’s finally showing interest.

“Well, my job can get rather hectic, and Carol keeps an eye on her for me until Cove gets off work. He normally watches over her whenever he’s home.”

“Ah… so you and Cove?”

“We live together, yeah.”

His hand grips the wheel tightly. Was he jealous that Cove spent more time with Gabrielle than him? He should just be honest about that, honestly. If he asked, she would’ve been happy to let him slowly build up a relationship with their daughter.

“I see…” he sounded rather… dejected. Almost accepting of the situation.

“I can always bring her along next time,” Rosaline offered. “She’ll be disappointed that I’m going to a bakery without her,” she chuckled.

“If that’s what you’d like,” he smiled, fake just like all the other smiles.

Even now, he was still holding back.

———————————

Several Days Ago

End of Summer

Step 4: Age 23

———————————

Even now, she felt like she was holding back.

“It’s okay, we can handle the clean-up,” Cove reassured her, his hand a warm comfort on her shoulder. “Take a break, Rosa,” he smiled. “Gabby’s with Lee; she came by to drop her off with your moms. So it’s fine, just… take a breather? You deserve it after all that’s happened.”

“The wedding’s over, so you can just leave it to us,” Terry grinned, and Miranda smiles, nodding along with him encouragingly.

She relaxes her tense shoulders, and she manages to smile back at them, feeling a bit weak.

“Yeah… you’re right. I need a break,” she took in a shaky breath and stands up. Eyes searching around the mostly empty room, spotting Baxter’s distant figure. She walks, her heels tapping against the marble floor as she deliberately bridges the gap between them.

And it’s Baxter, who keeps his back turned, whose back shifts as if tensing as her footsteps draw closer and closer. And it’s Baxter, and it’s always been Baxter, who draws her attention.

“Baxter,” she says, breathing, and steeling her expression.

He’s going to run away from her again, and if he does, she’s not quite sure how she’ll be able to handle it. Would it result in another night, crying in Lee’s arms like back then? She supposes that it’s a good thing Lee texted her earlier, saying to call her whenever she gets home. They both didn’t expect him to stay and talk.

“Ah, Rosaline,” he greets, turning to face her with that infuriatingly familiar smile. It was the same smile he used to maintain his professionalism, the same smile that showed her that he was just going to keep pulling away from her. His posture shows a clear desire to leave ASAP.

And her heart drops. Because even now, she was hoping that he would just… turn around and change his mind. That maybe he would give himself another chance with her.

But no, she supposes that was just a dream, and this was just her fulfilling a promise.

It’s just a dance, she tells herself and tries not to cry.

#wynter writes #fic: when honestly you can't recall #baxter ward #our life: beginnings & always #baxter x mc

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azurecanary · 11 months

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One of the reasons I love Dousy so much is it's a second love ship for both of them but it never feels like a rebound, they moved on from their pasts and are making a unique connection with each other that has nothing to do with their exes or trying to get over someone else. I shipped Peggysous during AC too so no hate, but that felt like a major rebound on Peggy's side and like she was still pining for Cap, and I always thought Daniel deserved better than that. Also it's poetic that Daisy fell in love with a literal WWII veteran who fought the Nazis after everything Grant and HYDRA did to her, she deserved the happiest ending

YES TO ALL OF THIS!!

One benefit i think Dousy has is that it happens 3-4 years after Lincoln and 5-10 years after Peggy, so it feels like both characters have developed past their previous love interests.

And I agree about how PeggySous feels like a rebound, especially after Endgame and What If.

And i LOVE that added poetry of Sousa being a WWII vet after what Ward and Hydra did to Daisy. And bonus points, it feels like Sousa fits the image of who Daisy thought Ward was. Being a stickler for the rules while still being kind. Of course Sousa has way more charm and a sense of humour that Ward didn't have.

#dousy #daisy johnson #daniel sousa #anti peggysous #just in case #agents of shield #agent carter

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nottskyler · 1 year

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I couldn’t sleep last night and part of the time I was upset about the Church’s press release related to the overturning of Roe v Wade and the abortion law that took effect in Utah (which has very secret combination vibes because the average person did not think it would be overturned and this law passed without my hearing about it two years before it took effect). I know it’s a very passé topic, but I’m going to try to put my feelings into coherent words.

1) President Nelson is a doctor and should know better than to speak on a field that is not his expertise. OBGYNs and people who have worked in fertility know very well that having a fertilized egg is not what makes a baby. Yes, it is an important ingredient, but number of fertilized eggs doesn’t not equal how many babies you get. It’s not when life starts or people with uteruses would have no hope of being exalted because of how many fertilized eggs our bodies reject. Saying fertilization is when life begins is an insult to everyone with a uterus who struggles with fertility. (And a flat out lie with our current medical knowledge)

2) Life begins at fertilization is not the official Church stance and speaking during a press release as the head of the Church is attempting to change doctrine without going through the proper process (unanimous vote by counsel of prophet and apostles which should include their wives). Abortion is banned because it is “like unto” murder, not because it actually is. Saying life starts at fertilization changes the crime of abortion to be more akin to murder.

3) Regardless of all of the above, the Church is supposed to support religious freedom. We live in an era where a lot of beliefs are not part of an organized religion, but that doesn’t mean they don’t deserve to have the same rights as people belonging to an organized religion. Abortion is considered vital for women to be equal in society by the majority of Americans. The Church should not be rejoicing in restricting the agency of a large group to live according to their beliefs. It goes against religious freedom, but of course the institution of the Church only supports “religious freedom” which is actually forcing others to live according to my beliefs even if they believe differently.

4) One of the main reasons the Church is not terrible for expecting its members to not have abortions is because of the social safety net that the Church provides. If you can’t afford a doctor, your ward leadership will step in to pay for it and even drive you. If you can’t afford housing, the Church will help you get housing and gainful employment to pay for it. Ward members will help and give free childcare. Unless the Church plans on using its $100 billion to make sure no one lives in poverty, it has no room to expect people outside the Church to live its beliefs (if you ignore the whole religious freedom stuff we supposedly support).

5) Everyone takes for granted how dangerous and risky pregnancy and childbirth are. Yes, we all are because someone took that risk, but people should be allowed to opt out of that risk because medical knowledge has advanced to allow that. Pregnancy is rough. I know media loves cryptic pregnancy stories, but that is the exception instead of the rule. HG is the absolute worst and no one should be forced to go through 9 months of that. And no one should risk their life giving birth if they don’t want to, especially people who already have children to take care of (who also likely know the risks better than before having their first kid as they’ve already gone through it).

6) The whole multiply and replenish the earth stuff works a lot better by persuasion than by force and the scriptures literally say that forcing people to keep commandments means amen to your priesthood (sorry President Nelson, your power diminished by supporting someone forcing people to do something). Living wage, housing first homeless programs, accessible childcare and healthcare, better air quality and communities (ie not car dependent), etc will do so much more to convince people to keep surprise pregnancies than making it illegal to get an abortion. I think a lot of people would have more children if the world was better, but nobody wants to listen to that.

So yeah, the Church needs to do a lot of repenting, including President Nelson. It’s wrong to deny abortions because you think pregnancy is as easy as getting fat and ejaculating and are privileged enough to not see the extent of poverty and how it ruins families. Investing in artificial wombs will do more for birth rates than any abortion ban (as it won’t change the birth rate whereas abortion bans will cause women to opt to be sterilized rather than deal with an unwanted pregnancy). And by their fruits you shall know them, letting young girls die from pregnancy and childbirth is a pretty rotten fruit.

#queerstake #abortion

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druckkugelschreiber · 1 year

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Had a dream about being stuck in a time loop where I wanted to save Grant Ward from a shield base before they could lobotomize him and when I tell you that dream revived my bottomless anger about what the series did to him and how he deserved better.

He was trying!!!! He actually tried to do and be better. He had the beginning of such a good redemption arc and everyone just kicked him.

#i will never not be angry about what they did to him #furious #grant ward #schreibers dream diaries

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asoiafandotherbooks · 5 months

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TWOIAF/Fire & Blood: The Death of Two Queens, A Prince, A Workforce, and the Curse of Harrenhal Begins...

Warning, Spoilers Ahead…

Maegor has finished his eradication of House Harroway. That leave the question of who will take ownership of Harrenhal. The answer? A Royal Rumble! Twenty-three knights of the king’s household competed and Ser Walton Towers emerged victorious. He was named Lord of the Tower but died within the fortnight of his wounds. Harrenhal passed to Ser Walton’s eldest son. However, Maegor granted Lord Harroway’s town Lord Alton Butterwell and the rest of the Harroway holdings to Lord Darnold Dary.

This was when the “curse of Harrenhal” stories originated as the string of owners continue to suffer ominous fates.

Maegor returned home to discover Visenya had died. Let us have a moment of silence to honor the true backbone of the first three Targaryen reigns. She was an active participant in the Conquest and the Dornish War, established the Kingsguard, took an active part in governance, prevented Aenys from destroying the dynasty, curbed Maegor’s worst impulses, and put down the rebellion of the Faith. I’m not saying she was a nice woman but put some respect on her name.

Maegor had Visenya cremated and had her ashes interred with Aegon the Conqueror. Poor Rhaenys never had her body returned so she is not buried with her sibling-spouses. The lack of her body lends more credence that Aegon killed her (and destroyed the body) when he brought “fire and blood” to Dorne.

Visenya’s death wasn’t the only bad news awaiting Maegor upon his return. Dowager Queen Alyssa Velaryon used Maegor’s absence to flee Dragonstone with her children. Except for one – Prince Viserys, the squire of Maegor. I assume Viserys was with Maegor on his “eradicate the Harroways” tour. Alyssa had stolen Dark Sister, and the children took their dragons (Vermithor and Silverwing).

Did Alyssa realize she was condemning Viserys to death when she fled Dragonstone with Alyssa and Jaehaerys. Maegor is not a forgiving man. Or even a nice man. Did Alyssa feel it was better to sacrifice one child than risk all three?

Maegor did not take the news of Alyssa’s desertion well. He sent the Kingsguard to seize Prince Viserys: “Chain him in a black cell and question him sharply. Ask him where his mother is gone.” Ser Owen Bush, a knight of the Kingsguard, protested: “He may not know”.

Maegor responded: “Then let him die. Perhaps the bitch will turn up for his funeral.”

Tyanna plied Viserys with her “dark arts” but he did not know where his mother had gone. The poor prince died after nine days of questioning. Maegor had left Visery’s body out in the ward of the Red Keep for a fortnight: “Let his mother come and claim him”. She never did and Maegor had Viserys’ body burned after Alyssa failed to appear. Viserys was fifteen years old when he was killed and had been “much loved by smallfolk and lords alike”.

Can you imagine the terror that Viserys felt upon his return to King’s Landing? He had witnessed Maegor’s wrath against Alys and her entire extended family. He knew first-hand what Maegor was capable of when angered. And the sense of abandonment he must have felt – his mother fled with her younger children and left him to the wolves. He suffered a tremendously cruel fate and did nothing to deserve it.

In 45 AC, construction came to an end on the Red Keep. Maegor celebrated by holding a feast for the builders and workmen who labored on the castle. It lasted for three days. On the third day, Maegor had the workers killed and their bones interred beneath the castle.

Not long after, Queen Ceryse was stricken with a “sudden illness” and passed away. A rumor around the court said that Ceryse had offended Maegor and he ordered Ser Owen Bush to remove her tongue. There was a struggle and Ser Owen accidentally slit Ceryse’s throat. This story was widely believed at the time but maesters feel it slander concocted by the king’s enemies.

I would put money on Tyanna being behind Ceryse’s death. Lo and behold, Tyanna is the sole remaining queen. A queen who is hated and feared by all.

Maegor ordered the construction of the Dragonpit atop Rhaenys’ Hill. He wanted a great stone “stable for dragons” erected, a lair worthy of Balerion, Vhagar, etc. Unsurprisingly, Maegor wasn’t having trouble finding a workforce for this project. It tends to happen when you massacre the previous workforce. Maegor had to resort to using prisoners from the city’s dungeons, under the supervision of builders from Myr and Volantis.

Up next, the Poor Fellows and the Warrior’s Sons raise their pesky heads (again)…

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bellatrixobsessed1 · 11 months

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Poet & Fable

I know that I said short thing because I don’t have a lot of time. But it became a long thing that I did while doing other stuff at the same time.

Summary: During the final battle Icy is very badly wounded and can no longer walk or user her magic. Mirta visits her in the hospital and introduces her to the therapy animals.

She died that day.

At least a few parts of her did.

The parts that count.

The parts that used to make her who she was.

She supposes that she deserves it. At the very least, she had been asking for it. She had played a bold and risky game. She had rode high and now she is plummeting low. She had been unbelievably powerful.

Untouchable.

Unstoppable.

What is she now?

What is left?

For every flicker of awesome power she had once felt, there is a feeling of weakness to fill the vacancy it has left. If only she could just feel hollow and numb. That would be boundlessly better than feeling empty and inadequate.

With Stormy and Darcy newly transferred to The Fortress Of Light for rehabilitation she has no one to keep her company during her physical rehabilitation. Not that she has ever been one to crave company. She had never minded being a loner, she was perfectly content with it prior to meeting Darcy and Stormy.

But now? Now it would be nice to hear the two of them bickering and blaming each other for why their plans had failed. At the moment she wouldn’t mind hearing them nag at and point the finger at her for their thwarted schemes.

She can’t imagine that they’d want to speak with her these days. It would be rather humiliating to be associated with her. More so than being confined to the Fortress Of Light. Icy reaches for the glass of water on the bedside table next to her. The doctors had called that progress.

Lifting her arm was progress.

Now if only she could do that with her legs…

.oOo.

She still isn't used to Alfea. It is nice there, certainly. But she still feels so out of place. Sure, she has a fairy form but on the day to day…

She pulls her combat boots up and fixes her tattered vest jacket over her shoulders. She doesn’t quite fit in here either.

Mirta sighs. Sometimes she needs to get away.

And she needs to get away from both crowds; the fairies and the witches. Mostly the witches but certain fairies can be rather catty. And so her feet carry her off campus and towards Magix hospital.

She spends her spare time at one of three places; the veterinary clinic, the Magix nursing home, or the hospital. She frequents the veterinary clinic the most–the dogs and cats seem to adore her company and the bats and rats are delighted to finally have someone who is willing to snuggle with them.

Today she has volunteered to go with Evan to bring their therapy animals to the hospital. Tomorrow they will be delighting the nursing home with fluffy companions. No one seems to appreciate wagging dog tails and prancing kitty paws like the old folks at the Magix nursing home. The children at Magix hospital are very enthusiastic though.

And the animals themselves are delighted to have company while they heal up.

Today Mirta carries a def rabbit in her arms and, following at her feet, prances a dog with a broken tail. Evan holds a cat with a burned paw and a kitten that has been recovering from a car accident.

“I’ll go to the youth ward today, they’ve been wanting to see the cats.” He says.

So that leaves her to go visit with the adults and young adults. She doesn’t mind. She hopes to visit as many rooms as she can, at least until the rabbit, cutely named Lily, begins getting twitchy. The dog, a spunky fellow named Fetcher, never seems to tire of the company.

.oOo.

Physical therapy is more grueling mentally than it is physically. If she could feel physical discomfort, that would be a wonderful thing. It would mean that she could feel at all. And maybe she could get her powers back, the ones that she had taken for granted.

She misses the feeling of frost on her finger tips.

She misses the exhilaration of a biting chill.

Of the rush of magic.

Of course the fairy says that she hadn’t intended to paralyze her nor cut her off from her powers permanently. Icy believes her; the girl wouldn’t have the heart to do so purposefully. And that makes it all the worse.

Somehow it makes things worse.

But she had done it. She had thrown just the right spell in just the wrong way. Coupled with a nasty, spine crunching fall, she hadn’t a chance really. The doctors speculate that the magic blast had burned her ice magic away–a combination of her having stolen the dragon fire in the first place and Bloom’s spell–while the breaking of her spine had taken the use of her legs.

Her magic might resurface on its own with time.

They aren’t so sure about her ability to walk.

If she had her magic and cold fly or teleport that might not be so terrible. Instead, after another unsuccessful day of trying to will her legs to work, they wheel her back to her bed and mutter about the peculiarity of her body’s resistance to healing magic.

She is so immersed in dark magic, they speculate, that it rejects and deflects any sort of light magic.

It is, indeed, in a sense, her own fault that she cannot move.

.oOo.

Seeing her laying there and staring at the ceiling makes Mirta wonder how she had ever let herself be intimidated by Icy. The witch is much smaller than Mirta remembers. Or maybe it is because this is the first time she has had a chance to actually look at her unclouded by anxiety or the rather large distance of a safe proximity. Icy doesn’t seem to notice her and Mirta is good at keeping very quiet.

Fetcher is not.

He unleashes a booming bark. One that gives Mirta the pleasure of seeing Icy jolt. “Fuck…” she mutters, rubbing her hands over her face.“I think that this is the closest I’ve come to being able to use my legs again.”

“I can try to bring Fetcher for surprise visits more often.” Mirta replies. “Maybe if I startle you enough you’ll be on your feet again and you can stop sulking.” Her stomach lolls, she has never been this blunt with Icy. The witch is going to destroy her.

When she manages to sit up, Mirta can see a twinkle of amusement in her pale blue eyes. That entertainment is dwarfed by the settling of the comment. The reminder of what she has lost. It settles upon Mirta too; she has only heard the rumors. And, truthfully, she had thought that they were just that. Icy has always been so powerful, it couldn’t possibly be true.

But it is and she is staring that right in the face.

And the person she sees is so different than the one who had looked own upon her during Cloud Tower meal times.

Without her makeup to exaggerate and dramatize, Mirta would argue that Icy has the face of a fairy. She is actually rather soft. Her hair, unbound and bedraggled falls over her shoulders in graceful white-blue waterfalls.

She has the look of a winter’s first snow; the sort that comes silently overnight and adds a sparkling enchantment to the rest of the day.

It is a softness that is accentuated by the sadness in her eyes.

“I didn’t mean anything by that…” Mirta begins.

Icy rolls those pretty blue eyes. “At least stick to your words. You’re still pathetic.”

“Alright, fine! If you want me to stick to my words, I will! First of all, I really was just being awkward and you happened to take offense! Second of all, I’m not the pathetic one, you are! You’re just laying here feeling sorry for yourself. You used to be the most feared witch in Magix, now look at you.”

“I’ll give that a six out of ten.” Icy mutters. “You hit a raw spot but your delivery could use some work.”

“You know what, I’ve got a whole hospital full of people who actually want to talk to me, so I’ll just go.” Mirta hugs Lily closer. “Have fun with your self-pity.

“I’ll give that one an eight. Maybe an eight point five. Could be a nine after I have some more time to really ruminate on it and let it settle in.” Icy inspects her nails. Her dark blue polish is chipping off.

Mirta pauses in the doorway. Her face softens. “You’re lonely, aren’t you.”

“I’m perfectly content being that way.”

She’s perfectly content pretending to be happy that way. Mirta knows that she shouldn’t–that it’s terribly low to kick her when she’s already down. That it will make her just as cruel as the ice witch herself but she can’t help it. “Well then I’ll leave you to it.”

“Wait.” Icy frowns. “I want to see the animals.”

“I didn’t know that you liked cute fuzzy things.” Mirta musters up a grin.

Icy shrugs. “I don’t care for them.”

“But…”

“I’m bored. It’s boring and depressing here.”

“I thought that you enjoyed depressing things.”

“I enjoy the concept of depression. Feeling it?” She furrows her brows. “Different matter entirely. Now let me see the animals.”

“Ask nicely.” Mirta requests.

“I don’t do anything nicely. Show me the fuzzy animals.”

Before the ‘or what’ can come out, Mirta bites her tongue. Maybe letting Icy meet Lily and Fetcher will be the start of something productive for the woman. “The bunny is Lily and Fetcher is the pitbull, chocolate lab mix.” She passes Lily to Icy who has taken to running her palm along Fetcher’s back.

“Careful with Fetcher’s tail.”

Icy follows her gaze to the cast.

“If I knew that I would be visiting you I would have one of our more misunderstood, underappreciated animals.” Mirta remarks. But, whether she’ll admit it or not, Icy looks quite content with Lily and Fetcher.

She is left to assume that this is supposed to remain between just the two of them.

Mirra imagines that, aside from the doctors, this is the only company she has had in months. Of course she is going to pretend like she hates every minute of it.

.oOo.

“I figured that the bunnies and puppies weren’t your thing so I bought you something else.”

Truth be told, Icy hadn't expected Mirta to come back, not with their less that pleasant history.

She certainly hadn't expected her to come back with gifts.

"This is Poet." She introduces. In her hand is a small rat. "He was found in the drawer of a writing desk in Cloud Tower with his tail dripping ink."

Icy holds her hand out. The rat fits perfectly in her palm. She strokes his head.

"A lot of witches don't bother with the animal clinics and sanctuaries because they think that they're too cute. But we have a really impressive collection of bats, rats, and snakes! I'm one of the only people who wants to handle them…at least of the Alfea volunteers."

Icy nods. "Stormy likes snakes and frogs. Darcy likes bats and spiders." She hates how much she misses the both of them. She had never been the sentimental sort.

"What do you like?"

She holds Poet up. "And birds; crows and ravens. Vultures sometimes. Not ducks. Definitely not ducks."

Mirta chuckles. "Well then I think that you're going to like Fable." She places a silver cage on the bedside table and opens the door.

Out flies a raven.

A one eyed raven.

"She lost her eye a few months ago. She was fighting with another raven over a mouse."

Icy swallows. Fable is like her. Battle wounded and shamed.

"And she's up for adoption if you want some company."

"Does that mean that you won't be visiting again?" She tries not to sound disappointed.

"Do you want me to stop visiting?"

She save herself the humiliation and say yes. That she hasn't fallen so low that she will actually talk to a loser like Mirta. "Things haven't been as dull since you started coming here. It is rather entertaining to see the hospital staff, Sunny in particular, get all squirmy and anxious around the rats.

"You know that you're allowed to say that you want a friend, right?"

"I don't have friends."

"What about Darcy and Stormy?"

"We don't see each other as friends. We have like minded goals and that is enough." She can't imagine that they miss her. They probably resent her for costing them their freedom.

"I don't think that that's true." Mirta smiles.

Icy let's Fable perch upon her arm. "You also seem to think that I'll be getting my magic and ability to walk back."

Mirta shrugs. "Stranger things have happened."

"Such as…?" She runs her fingers over Fable's feathers as Poet crawls in circles on her lap.

"Well, you haven't said an unkind thing to me and I've been here for an hour and a half." She quirks a brow.

"I've been saving the insults for the right moment."

"If you say so." Mirta shrugs.

"I am. I have a few just waiting to be said."

"Well, I guess that you don't want Fable…"

Icy clutches the bird to her chest. "Just try to take her!"

Mirta laughs. "I'm just joking. Fable is yours. But I am going to come in and check on her."

"That's fine."

Of course Mirta won't know it, but her company is rather welcomed. She enjoys hearing her silly taste in music--all of the new ages pop goth hits and the witch house music. It is so different but, at the same time, very similar to her old school rock taste. "Just don't play that cybergoth shit, okay."

"I knew it!" Mirta declares too loudly. She has scared Fable into a disgruntled squawk. "You do enjoy having me around."

"Don't get used to it. Once I'm out of here…once I get my powers back and free Darcy and Stormy, this whatever it is,is over."

"If you say so."

"I will get my powers back." She vows with more bravado than she truly feels.

"I've been telling you that."

"And yet you sound skeptical." But no more skeptical than Icy truly is.

"Not about the getting your powers back."

Mirta very clearly has more nerve than she had thought. She actually reaches out and ruffles Icy's hair.

"Don't touch that." Icy crosses her arms and Fable lands on her shoulder. Mirta is getting much too comfy with this arrangement that they have silently made. This silly truce of sorts.

Mirta retracts her hand and plants a kiss on Icy's now flushed cheek. "You and Fable keep each other company. I'll be back tomorrow." She promises.

And probably the next day and the day after that. She is annoyingly persistent and, more annoyingly, Icy finds that she respects the audacity. She is sickeningly kind but she has an admirable confidence. One that Icy had missed beneath the soft spoken, gentle nature.

She scoops Poet up and makes her way to the door. Icy casts a sidelong glance at Fable. And Fable glances, as best as she is able, at her. Somehow she gets the sense that she was also slow to get used to Mirta. She wonders how many pecks she'd given the young witch before finally giving in.

At least she won't be alone in her conflicted feelings towards Mirta.

At least she won't be alone in her recovery in general.

For the first time in ages, she thinks that she feels the faintest twitch of frost in her veins. She looks to the glass on her bedside table. The ice cubes within have since melted. She supposes that someone should do something about that.

#Winx Club #Winx #Winx Icy #Icy/Mirta #Winx Mirta #Mirta #Fanfiction #One Shot

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13xwishes · 1 year

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It's been a bit of a long day for Adrien. By now he's grown more than used to the demands of managing his busy schedule. But returning to school after a sudden weekend trip out of Paris has been tiring, to say the least. He's been able to manage his fatigue for most of the morning, but by lunch break it's a bit of a struggle to keep up.

Being pulled aside by Gigi isn't uncommon for him. It's good for Adrien to touch base whenever he misses any classes, and he's sure she's noticed his dwindling energy. Usually, they have some sort of talk about the significance of taking time to himself. But today, Adrien just isn't interested in engaging in a drawn out conversation. Instead, he just sits himself next to Gigi, and let's his head rest to her shoulder. He just needs to close his eyes for a minute, and he's certain she won't let anyone disturb him.

Wish Granted || @strcngered || Miraculous!Verse

Gigi wasn't blind like most to Adrien's lifestyle. She pretty much sure there were certain child labor laws or something illegal regarding how Adrien lived or working too hard. Modeling, going to school AND working as a superhero was something that can only be achieved of a storybook tale and yet Adrien dealt with everyday.

She admired it... but was also angry of it. Her ward did not deserve of how he was treated.

Even with her influence in a way, Gigi had never met a human like Gabriel Agreste and his cold demeanor to most. Even to Adrien himself. The best the genie did was to get involved with him. Should Adrien be told to dine alone, Gigi instead invited him over since she was trusted so long she had Adrien back. Should Adrien finish a photoshoot, Gigi would snag him away before his next activity to have a small lunch or even have Nino pop in to hang out. And should Adrien 'study', Gigi visited in his room to fang out when he overworked and just relaxed together.

Today was one of those days.

Gigi gently caressed Adrien's hair as he leaned against her shoulder, letting him rest. Today no games or reading or anything was needed. Just this moment of silence... a moment to rest. She would make sure her child pupil was going to be taken care of. She would do much research, but Adrien deserved better.

It was her duty. Not just as their mento, but because she started to truly love Adrien.

#ic #sun summoned #strcngered #{ v: miraculous }#{ tl: teacher's assistant }#{ crossover }#//she loves this kid so much #//he is her child okay?

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scholad · 1 year

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Scholarship for Girls after 10th

Women-specific scholarships' fundamental goal is to motivate women and girls to overcome the social and financial barriers they face and pursue academic and professional opportunities. Many public and private organizations in a variety of sectors have recently started awarding the free scholarship in India to women in an effort to encourage the better half of the population to take advantage of educational possibilities.

Let’s have a quick look at some prominent scholarships available for Indian girls after the 10th standard.

The Vidyadhan scholarship

It is provided by the Sarojini Damodaran Foundation (SDF), which aids deserving students from low-income families by covering their tuition costs from the eleventh grade through the senior year. To date, this scholarship has been awarded to 13,000 students.

To be eligible, an individual must have completed the 10th grade in the states of Gujarat, Goa, Karnataka, Kerala, Maharashtra, Odisha, Tennessee, Telangana, and Karnataka with at least 90 % of marks or an A+ grade.

CBSE merit scholarship scheme for single girl child

This program awards financial aid to deserving single female students if they are the only child in the family. This program intends to reward parents for their efforts in supporting girls' education and to motivate parents to educate their daughters.

To be eligible the applicant must be the parent's only girl child. Moreover, the student must be enrolled in Class XI and XII in CBSE-affiliated schools and have a 60% or higher grade point average or 6.2 CGPA.

Indian Oil Academic Grant

Various categories from various fields are featured in this scholarship. After finishing grade 10, students can enroll in a variety of courses, including ITI, engineering, MBBS, and others to be eligible for this program. The intention is to provide financial aid to PWDs, SC, ST, and OBC students. Students must enroll in a regular, full-time course.

Eligible candidates must achieve a minimum of 65% in the stream-specific topics for general students, 60% for SC/ST/OBC/Girls, and 50% for students with disabilities. The minimum age of the applying candidate should be 15-20 years and the family's annual income should not be more than 1,000,000 INR.

The Saraswati Academy Scholarship

The awardees of this scholarship are determined by an exam. This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to assist deserving students who are struggling financially.

Students in class 10 are qualified for this. Those who score 90% or more marks in the science and mathematics groups are eligible for 100% of the tuition fee as scholarship, whereas those who score 90% or lesser marks get 60% of the tuition fee as scholarship.

Indian Nation Olympiad

This initiative is funded by the Indian government and aims to identify and prepare Indian athletes for a variety of foreign Olympiads. It encourages students to take on difficulties and participate in international competitions. To be eligible the candidate must be an Indian national.

PM scholarship for class 10 students

Our honorable PM Shri Narendra Modi has announced many schemes for the welfare of Indian students. Some of these include dedicated scholarships for:

Any student who is a dependent ward, or the widow of a former service member, or member of the coast guard who passed away while serving in a combat zone, or became disabled while serving in the military.

A pupil whose parents are not military personnel or recipients of paramilitary awards.

Any student pursuing their education solely in a traditional setting rather than through a distance learning program.

To conclude

Please spread the information about scholarships in India to as many girls as you can to give them hope for a better future. It is these gestures by the Indian government that will build a better foundation for India’s upcoming generations.

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nyssandracousland · 1 year

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Chapter 9

Nyss woke up with her door cracked open, she decided to peek out and could hear two voices coming from down the hall. She could tell one was Cullen and the other Greagoir.

“You will be there.” Greagoir said then started to walk away.

Nyss didn’t hear anything else from the conversation, except the slow footsteps of who she assumed was Cullen approach. She backed away from the door and dove into bed. Her door slowly open, and Cullen stood in her doorway.

“Hello?” She said from her bed.

“Oh My Lady I am so glad you are finally awake.” He said relieved.

“What time is it?”

“After midday, I wanted you to sleep, I felt you needed the real rest.” He said.

Cullen didn’t seem himself, he came in and sat on the edge of her bed.

“What’s troubling you?” She asked, placing her hand on his arm.

“Nothing My Lady, just tired. Someone kept me awake last night.” He forced a smile.

Nyss knew something was bothering him. “Have I said or done anything to offend you?”

Cullen looked into her caring eyes and could see himself in their reflection. “You have been almost too perfect.” He smiled, then straightened himself up. “Come! You have a little left to see around the Tower and the day is short.”

Nyss put on her cloak and shoes. Cullen leafed through a book while she arranged her hair. She could see him glance at her from the corner of her eye, and she could feel a her cheek grown warm.

“I wanted to show you something special today. Not many people are allowed in, but I have been granted to show you the reliquary where we keep the phylacteries before they are sent to Denerim.” He said.

“What is a phylactery?”

“When each mage comes here we take a vial of their blood. This blood is kept stored and if they ever were to run away, we Templars use it to track down the run away mage.” He said quietly.

Nyss softly recoiled, “So you are saying it’s their leash?”

“Yes.”

“So why tell me?” She felt slightly bothered by knowing this.

“You deserve to know. You asked me about The Harrowing and I obliged, I figured this was something else you should be made aware of.”

Nyss took a moment to think on what he said. Even if Emmy some day escaped from the Tower she could be tracked down and hunted like a beast. However the implication is to have a mage freed, you must destroy it so they cannot be tracked.

“Thank you for telling me.” His honesty was really getting the better of her. She really didn’t think that a Templar would be this forthcoming with information.

Cullen lead Nyss deep into the heart of the Tower. There were no windows, and no lit torches apart from the one they carried. Deeper into the belly they went and finally came to a locked door.

Cullen waved his hand in front of it and it slowly creaked open. They walked inside and he lit the brazier on the floor. Light flooded the room. It was full of vials and vials of mage blood.

“I thought you said it all goes to Denerim?”

“Once you pass your Harrowing, until then it stays here.”

Nyss examined the vials and the walls lined with even more mage artifacts. There were staves and cowls. Some robes, and tomes.

“Has anyone tried to break in here?” She asked.

“A few times. Some have been successful, but we have wards up and most do not make it past them.” He looked down. “It’s a death sentence for anyone magical to try.”

He walked over to a shelf and grabbed a particularly beautifully shaped vial. He handed it to her.

“What’s this?”

“That is Emmy’s phylactery.” He said calmly.

“Why hand it to me? I could smash it and she would be halfway to being free.” She asked.

“I trust you not to. I know you won’t do something like that.”

Nyss nodded. The vial was beautiful. Purple and blue glass, mixed with hints of red. The label read “Emelie Amell, Lady of Highever.” She half grinned.

“I had them write that on there. Give her the dignity she deserves.” He softly said, placing his hand on her arm gently.

Nyss closed her eyes and exhaled. “I appreciate you trusting me with this is, but I fear I am quite uneasy being in here.”

“Let’s leave then.” He carefully restored the vial to the illuminated shelf, “Care for a game of chess?”

“Anything.”

As quickly as they entered it seemed they had left. Cullen first up the stairs and then Nyss right behind him. They made their way back all the way up to the balcony they played their game on.

There they sat for hours, enchanted by strategy and one another. The Frost Backs glistened with snow and the sun slowly went down behind them. Nyss felt chill crawl up her spine. The breeze had picked up and Cullen seemed to notice it too.

“Let’s go in My Lady, your nose is turning a lovely pink, and my stomach tells me it’s nearly supper time.” He smiled.

They cleaned up their game and walked alongside each other to the Great Hall. When they entered Nyss could smell the warm aroma of herbs and meat. She took a deep breath.

“It smells fantastic in here.” She said.

“Tonight’s meal is special, we only get it once in a while, and since we have a special guest I wanted to share it with you.” He smiled.

“Me?” She raised an eyebrow.

“Of course you. It’s a Ferelden special. Turnip and Mutton pie with a lovely side of Hearth Bread and Golden Scythe 4:90 Black.” He smiled.

“It sounds delicious.” She grinned.

The pair sat at their table and other Templars joined. Nyss ate and drank happily as the other men spoke of their lives to her. She asked each one how they came to the Circle and what their aspirations for it were.

They all wanted something better for Thedas, was the consensus. She wasn’t going to argue, but she also didn’t want to evoke any anger towards Mages so she kept her opinions to herself and kept drinking.

She smiled as each Templar told her about their families and how even though they rarely see them, they love the life they have serving the Maker. She admired their devotion, even if it was to a sad cause.

A while later Cullen stood and told her it was time for bed. Nyss excused herself from the table and they walked back to her chambers. Cullen walked slower than usual. The drink making his senses a little fuzzy. Nyss held onto him so she wouldn’t tumble over. She then started to laugh at absolutely nothing.

“What’s so funny?” He asked.

“I just realized I sat around with Templars drinking all night.” She giggled. “You have to tell me did I make a fool of myself?”

Cullen leaned against the hallway wall and chuckled. “Not at all Nyss. You kept your composure quite well.”

That was the first time he called her Nyss.

She blushed.

“I’m glad, I didn’t want the liquor to loosen my tongue. I might have embarrassed myself and everyone.” She smiled.

“You were magnificent. A drinker to contend with!” He said emphatically.

“Shhhh” Nyss shushed him, “People are sleeping.”

Cullen laughed. “I haven’t had this much fun in my entire life.” He glanced at his feet and put his hand behind his head, “I really wish you didn’t have to leave.”

“We have all day tomorrow to enjoy, then I can see my friend and we can take off into the sunrise!” She said happily, almost as if wishing it to be truth.

Cullen opened the room door for her, and then grabbed her hand as she walked by. “Thank you My Lady for an enchanting evening.” He kissed the back of it slowly. He soft lips left a warm feeling in the pit of her stomach.

Nyss heart beat so loud she knew he could hear it.

“Odd how you can find someone in life who can wiggle their way into your heart so quickly when you allow it.” He mused, slowly letting her go.

“Goodnight Ser Templar.” Her cheeks rosy,. “We truly find things in unexpected places.”

“Goodnight Nyssandra Visus Cousland, I will be here if you need me.” He bowed.

She shut the door and melted against the back of it. ‘So this is what it feels like.’ She thought as she sat on the floor. Slowly Nyss moved to the bed and watched the world spin around her as she drifted to sleep.

Nyss woke up realizing the end of her stay would be tomorrow and she could finally see Emmy. She was excited, but also in a bit of a fog. She had drank quite a bit the night before but remembered the last of it perfectly.

Nyss got dressed and braided her hair into a crown around her head. When she opened her door to find Cullen, he was still laying on his cot. She smiled, ‘He drank a bit too much too.’ She walked over and sat on the thin edge of his bed.

“Ser?” She tapped him on the shoulder.

“Mmm, I said the Chant twice before I fell asleep, leave me be.” He mumbled.

“Cullen, it’s time to wake up or I’ll go roam the Tower alone.” She threatened teasingly.

That seemed to rouse him. “No my lady!” He startled awake

“I’m just kidding!” She laughed.

“Makers breath, you are a sight to wake up too. I’m sorry I over slept, I fear I let myself go too far last night.”

“No harm, come let’s go eat breakfast.”

Cullen got up and put on his boots, and straightened his robes. Nyss folded his blanket and handed him his gloves.

They walked together to the Great Hall and sat at their table. Fine cheeses and hot oatmeal was served. They ate in silence until their minds returned to their normal state.

“Do not Templars have a draft that gets rid of this?”

“Ha! If only. I would do it all again though for last night. You really are the most fun.”

Nyss smiled at Cullen she was glad he could have fun with her. She was happy her mind had wandered away from Emmy.

“It’s my last full day here is it not?” She asked

“Yes, tomorrow morning they will make her pass the final test.”

“But it’s not a Harrowing right? That means she will be fine.”

Cullen scraped his bowl with his spoon. He swallowed and looked at Nyss. “It is not the Harrowing, but it is still as dangerous for her.”

Nyss eyes widened. A flicker of disbelief crossed her face. “You mean, she could be possessed?”

Cullen nodded.

Nyss leaned back and stared at the Great Halls ceiling. She knew what it meant for someone to be possessed. Instant death. ‘Emmy is strong, she’s made it this far.’ She reasoned.

Nyss closed her eyes and could feel Cullens gaze on her. She slowly opened her eyes and saw him staring at her. “It’s okay, Emmy is strong. She is a force. She will be fine.” He reached for her and squeezed her hand.

“So far it seems as if things are alright. No news is good news.” He said.

Nyss tilted her head to one side as she watched the Young Templar drink the last few drops from his goblet. The blue in his robes made the veins in his neck look bright. She did not want to, but she felt as if she was allowing herself to trust him. “Please, keep me occupied today.” She said quietly.

Cullen reached to her again, and placed his hand on the back of hers out of comfort. Electricity shot through her limbs. “That is exactly what I planned on doing.” His voice low, and reassuring.

Cullen walked Nyss through the gardens, and kept her mind busy with stories of his childhood. Cullen was a model child, and always did what he was told, while Nyss felt a little guilty being the one who kept getting in trouble with everyone, and told Cullen of the time she put itching salts in her fathers robes.

“You were feisty as a child. I suppose there’s nothing wrong with that.” He said with a smile.

Cullen was smiling a lot more and to Nyss, it was nice to see. Almost as if he forgot himself as a Templar. She liked that, it humanize him a great deal, and she felt even more comfortable with him at her side.

The pair walked through a small patch of crystal Grace and as they did, he instinctively reached down and handed her a flower.

“What’s this for?” Nyss said examining the stunning colors.

“Oh, sorry I didn’t think of the implication. I just saw it and thought you’d like it.” He said quickly.

“Thank you.” She smiled. “It is beautiful.”

“Just like the woman I handed it to.” He said so quietly Nyss was sure she heard him incorrectly.

They continued to walk through the gardens, Nyss could see sparks flying from the other side of a high wall. “Whats on the other side of this?” Nyss asked.

“That is where the Circle Mages practice their magic. They need a lot of space, as some of their spells actually pull them into the Fade. I’d let you watch, but it’s rather dangerous.” He said cautiously.

“I can only imagine Emmy practicing her magic there once she passes her test. She is going to amaze them with her abilities.” Nyss said proudly.

“Emmy will go over her last test tomorrow morning, if she passes it, she will definitely be over there in the future.” He said reassuringly.

Nyss stopped in her tracts and looked at her feet as if stuck in the moment. She looked up at Cullen and her green eyes started to swell.

“I have a lot of confidence in my friend, but I am worried. Like you said days ago ‘How would you feel being free, then caged?’ I would loose my mind under pressure. So please humor me.”

“Please, speak freely.” He could tell what she was about to ask was large. He took a stop closer to her and put his hand on her arm. “Tell me.”

“I have a thought, is there no way I can see her before her trial? What if she doesn’t pass? I would never forgive myself if I didn’t get to see her one last time.” Nyss said with a choked voice.

Cullens eyes searched her face. “No I - “ he stopped short.

He could see the pain in his new friends eyes. Was she his friend? Is this what happens? You start to feel for people who you spend time with. He was confused by themes emotions, but he didn’t want to see this young lady upset. “Let me see if I can talk to Greagoir. He has his rules, but this seems like a reasonable request.”

“Then I will wait here.” Her heart jumped with anticipation, “Cullen, thank you for even asking.”

“For you my lady, it is a pleasure.” He took his hand from her arm and turned to walk away. “Promise you’ll wait here?”

“You have my word.”

Nyss moved to a bench and sat down in the middle of the garden. She waited while Cullen went to find Greagoir. The sun had been shining and the spring had brought birds of all varieties flying over head. She could smell the aroma of fresh flower buds and mulch as she waited for the Templar to return. It seemed like ages before he came back to her.

Cullen walked up to Nyss and grabbed her hand. “Quickly, come this way.”

Without a word, Nyss followed him. He led her through back corridors and dark places. His grip ever tighter as they navigated the halls and spaces.

Finally after one last turn, he let go of her hand. Cullen took a step forward, turned around and said to Nyss “Stay here.”

As fast as he left her he was back, and behind him, was Emmy.

She did not look well. Her red hair was not glossy as it usually was, and her expressive eyes were lackluster.

“What’s happened to you?” Nyss asked and she embraced her friend. “I have been worried about you.” She kissed her friend on the head and held her close.

“I can’t even begin to tell you what’s happened to me behind that door, and I’m not going to tell you, for it would upset you far too much, and my heart cannot do that to you.” Emmy didn’t let go of her friend. They just stood there. Nyss’s eyes started to tear. “Whatever happens to me, just know, not all Templars are bad.” Emmy glanced at Cullen, “the compassionate ones are truly sent from the Maker.”

“My friend, I don’t know what I can do to help you through your final test.”

“Nyssandra my dearest,” Emmy wiped away Nyss’s tear. “If I do not pass, know, this was not your fault. You have always been my best friend. Remember the good times we had, and don’t forget, save the ones you can and be the woman you were meant to be.”

“I will make you proud. You will make me proud and by tomorrow this will all be over. We will be reunited and though different, our lives will still be meshed together.”

“You are such a beautiful soul.” Emmy said, kissing Nyss’ cheeks. “I love you.”

“I love you.” She responded, smiling through tears of pain.

“Emmy, it’s time to go.” Cullen said quietly. His words pulled her away from Nyss’s grasp and, and just like that was gone through the hall’s door.

Nyss put her back up to the wall and cupped her head in her hands. The pain this caused her, the only moments she had left with her friend. It ached in her soul. She let out a cry that was louder than she expected. She felt a stabbing in her heart. She fell to her knees and sobbed. She was shaking, and could tell from that brief visit, nothing good happened behind that door.

Cullen reappeared.

“Is that all the time I could have? It was mere moments.”

“It was more than you were supposed to have My Lady. Be great full, most people get none.” He reprimanded her.

Nyss hated to be corrected by a mage hating Templar, but she couldn’t disagree. “Then thank you for what you did allow me to have.” She sniffed, “I now know her fate is sealed. I will never see her again.”

“How do you know? Tomorrow may be fine.” Cullen said.

“She didn’t blow me a kiss like she usually does when she leaves.”

Cullen saw the pain in her face, and it made his heart ache.

She was still on the ground. Her knees were dirty and her hands were covered in tears. Cullen reached down to help her up. As he pulled her to her feet, he noticed the collar of her shirt was wet. He didn’t know how to react, as most people don’t care about what happens to mages, but this one Nobel woman did. He put his arms around her, and whispered, “I’m sorry for what I can’t change. She seems like the best friend someone could have.”

Nyss leaned her head on his shoulder. It was an odd feeling for her, it was a man she had not known more than a few days ago, but she felt comfortable enough to ask for his sympathy in this simple way.

As for Cullen, a woman in his personal space was a first. He kept strictly away from any thoughts of a woman, as not to be tempted. After all, no Templar wants to be struck by lightening for thinking of a woman as anything other than that.

After Nyss finally composed herself, she said “I would like to go back to my room to await the final test.”

“As you wish my lady.”

Cullen lead Nyss back to her room, and gently shut the door behind her. She then laid in her bed, with tears in her eyes, and fell asleep to the thoughts of her friend, whose appearance was as if she had been beaten and starved for the last week. Her dreams were not any better.

#dragon age #alistair #cullen #dragon age inquisition #how dragon age would go if i rewrote it #lover #love #mage #dragon age love #dragon age fan fic #dragon age romance #magic #lelianna #loss #sadness #death #lovers #romance #fanfic

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afaimscorner · 1 year

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Everytime I think it can’t get worse for me with “Star Trek”...

Ugh, that first “Star Trek: Coda”-Novel is so bad, it makes me wish they would just have let the Pocket Universe die without trying to give it an ending. I mean, yes Disney just cancelling the Expanded Universe and de-canonizing every Novel, Comic and Game ever written made me quit “Star Wars” and made me regret a good part of my fan-life, but if this is the alternative ... well, no but thanks.

The worst part is that it is “Star Trek: Picard” all over again. Every fan, who is here for anything else than Picard and some TNG Nostalgia is treated like a second class citizen. I mean, why promote this as a Crossover Series, if the first novel bascially only is for TNG-Relaunch Novel Fans? Not even “Titan” is in it, so why promote this as Picard, Riker, Sisko and Dax and their ships banding together, when this is not happening at all? (For reasons, I will get into later).

It seems like the second novel focuses on DS9 after all, but as a DS9-Fan, who read the first novel it’s like Icheb in “Picard” for Voyager-Fans all over again, but he got to be at least a boy in the fridge for Seven, and it was “only” Icheb, but here ...

SPOILER ALERT They just go an kill of Ezri Dax like she is just another Pocket Book Universe Supporting Character and not a Main Character from an actual Canon-Show! They make the greater tragedy of T’Ryssa Chen dying than Ezri and Dax dying! And, yes, it is a TNG-Novel (even though - again! - the lie about that everywhere), but when they killed of Janeway in another TNG-Novel back then it was a big thing and not an afterthought with her as one of many casulties. Granted, Pocket Books Ezri Dax has not much in common with Canon Ezri Dax at this point, but still ... they would never pull that with let’s say Geordi in a DS9-Novel, would they? It’s bad enough the whole Crossover seems to be “Let’s slaugther as many of our characters, that we investeted a good part of the last two decades of ST-Novels in, as possible, even though the Multiverse is ending and Our Timeline is probably going to be earased anyways”, but giving a Canon Character this treatment ist just beyond wrong. Sorry. I mean, feel free to do with the Pocket Book Character what you will, that’s in your rights, but this just isn’t, if it does not get the space it deserves. And if this was supposed to be a “Anyone can die”-Moment, why put on in an Universe-Ending Storyline? They stakes can’t get any higher than everyone dying and that is the fucking plot, so why do it at all? SPOILER ENDING

And apart from the senselss slaughter this novel was hundreds of pages of Wesley Techno-Babbeling Time Travel Mechanics combinded with a Jean-Luc Picard-love fest. Not a single interesting moment there for anyone who is interested in Wesley as a person instead of Plot Device or anyone whose favourite Trek-Character is any one but Jean Luc Picard.

I can’t believe this is supposed to be a love letter to the Pocket Book Universe, because frankly it feels like is was written by someone who actually hates it. Dayton Ward can claim he wrote that book, I refuse to believe it, even the worst David Mack Trek-Novels are usually better than this and Dayton Ward’s Trek-Novels always were much much better than this one in the past.

So, I hope this series gets better in the next two books (but I have my doubts), but mainly I am just done with the whole “TNG is the only Trek-Series that matters and Picard is the only character that matters”-attitude of all those so-called fans turned authors, who then claim to write for the whole fandom but only every shit on DS9- und Voyager-Fans. It’s all right to only write for TNG- and Picard-Fans, but if you do that don’t use the characters from the other shows! It is as simple as that.

So, no waiting for the translation did not pay off and my gut-feeling about “Coda” not being something I would like was totally spot on, at least for the first novel, but I fear it won’t get better.

#Star Trek #Pocket Books Universe #Star Trek: Coda #Moments Asunder #Rant

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heroeslogic · 2 years

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RESCUE ME

word count : 1,552 words

trigger warnings : kidnapping, torture, blood, mentions of abuse, psychological manipulation, hydra

setting : early 2015

note : you are under no obligation to read these oneshots in order to rp with alice. they are simply backstory which i wrote prior to moving alice to tumblr and i’d like to have them available to read so my hard work didn’t go to waste.

this one shot belongs to me, it was written by me. do not reblog. do not repost elsewhere. alice gallagher, the delinquent task force and associated ocs belong to me.

alice found herself with her wrists suspended above her head. she felt groggy, like her brain was only half functioning or she’d been dosed with something. when she moved, the cuffs on her wrists jingled. she was cuffed to some kind of grating above her.

“help! someone help me!” she yelled, her voice hoarse like she’d been yelling before, but didn’t remember doing so.

she heard footsteps above her, boots on the grating and then the same footsteps coming down steps. she kept yelling, louder despite how much it hurt her “come on! someone rescue me!” alice should’ve been thinking, trying to remember how she’d gotten here, but she was taking her chances with the screaming.

“please shut the hell up, agent gallagher. you know better than this.” grant ward stood in front of her shaking his head in disbelief. “you’re a good agent, a good kid, so save your voice.”

hydra scum had lead them on for years, made them all trust him, made her trust him. “you piece of shit, let me go!” she tried to pull free, but her toes just barely kept her stabilized on the ground and she knocked herself off balance in the struggle. her entire weight was supported in her wrists and she had to quickly balance herself on the toes of her boots again. behind her a metal fence offered little support for her back or even any grip for her feet.

“not until you talk and after that, well, i don’t have much use for you. you’re a good agent, but you’re not particularly important.” he walked closer to her. “you matter to may , coulson and especially hill. i want them to suffer.”

as he came further into her line of sight, she saw a knife in his hands. the sharp blade glinted in the dim light of what she thought was a basement. when she saw herself in the blade she realized that her face was bruised but only one spot on her head was bloody. he’d only kidnapped her, they hadn’t fought. “why’d you hit me?” it seemed odd to hit her if he’d already drugged her to get her here.

“you woke up and wouldn’t stay quiet. your voice gets obnoxious. you know, when you get angry you really hear the brooklyn accent. don’t take it personally.” he ran the knife along the exposed flesh on her arms and up her hands.

the blade was cold and she was sweating, it almost felt good until when she remembered who was inches from her and willing to kill her. “they’re gonna come looking for me or i’ll get out. i’m not telling you shit.” alice spat.

with that ward laughed. “you know, deep down, that you don’t deserve to be rescued, alice.”

he’d made her trust him, offered her help when she needed it. he’d made her think she was special, that tough ole agent ward had a soft spot for her. she’d told him everything, about her mom and dad, how she blamed herself for the abuse her sister suffered at her father’s hands when she’d run away. she’d told him how she felt like she let down everyone she cared about. he knew she’d rather die than let anyone get hurt because of her and that deep down she hated herself. s.h.i.e.l.d gave her a purpose but when she wasn’t working, she couldn’t keep her mind off her own shortcomings. when innocent people lost their lives even accidentally, after those missions, when she couldn’t save someone she blamed herself.

you don’t deserve to be rescued. it echoed in her mind, hitting all the right dark corners where her self hatred lay in wait for her to fall prey to its power. alice let her head fall, her chin hitting her chest. a strand of blonde hair fell in her face and she tried to blow it off.

“just make this easy for us both.” ward lifted her chin with the knife. “where’s the bunker where you were trained?”

alice shook her head. “like i said, i’m not telling you shit.”

ward glanced at the knife and then backed away from her, putting it down on the table. “you make everything so difficult for yourself. where’s the bunker?”

she made a face and blew a raspberry in his direction. he’d barely touched her and even getting her here he’d drugged her rather than more bloody methods. she could mistake that for him caring and wanted to test that theory.

he rolled his eyes, almost sad he’d have to hurt her. she had a nice face and she’d grown on him while he’d worked with her. ward balled up his fist, punching her hard in the side.

alice felt the wind get knocked out of her and she lost her balance again. her back hit the metal fence, hard. it offered her no comfort only more pain.

“every time you get mouthy, you get hit. your organs should be fine, but your ribs and face might not be so lucky.” he cocked his head. “let me ask you a different question, why isn’t your bunker on any shield records?”

now she knew he was serious. “because you’re too in love with skye to know where to look!” alice snapped.

he wound up again, this time hitting her ribcage with more force. she’d made this personal so he would too. “your sister still lives in brooklyn? she’s still in med school… should i pay her a little visit?”

tears were welling in her eyes, her wrists sore and fear pulsing through her every vein. “don’t you dare lay a hand on my sister, you fucking asshole.”

“i’ll take your sister out to dinner, show her what a gentleman i can be and then when we’re done i’ll bring her here and make her watch while i finish you off.” ward was getting tired of her, there seemed to be no end to her smart responses and she seemed to have no regard for her own life.

she squeezed her eyes shut tight, trying to hold back tears. “just kill me already, i’m not telling you anything, just don’t bring violet into this. she’s done nothing wrong!”

he exhaled and began hitting her again in the ribs and even in the face. as he did so he grunted out “then tell me where the bunker is and this can all be over. quick and easy.”

the young agent let out a whimper and spit blood into his face, earning her another punch. finally she’d had enough and felt like she was going to break. she couldn’t let her sister get brought into this, she couldn't let violet see her this way. “long island.” she whispered.

ward stopped his assault. “see that wasn’t so hard” he pulled his gun from his holster and pointed it at her head. just as he was about to pull the trigger, four voices began echoing through the place.

“we found them!”

alice let out a sigh, and began yelling as loudly as she could. “i’m down here! i’m down here!”

ward took off, out through a passageway that was shrouded by darkness.

moments later, agents morse, hunter, and may came down the steps followed by skye behind them. alice stopped yelling, but the tears she’d been holding back didn’t stop falling.

while may went after ward, agent hunter and skye helped her down. “i told him. i’m so sorry, i told him where the bunker was.”

she could barely hold herself up, and it was a tough sight seeing the girl like that. hunter was practically carrying her. “it’s alright, you’re alright.” he tried to console her, but he could see ward had really done a number on her.

skye turned to bobbi and at her nod followed may down the tunnel. she was sure agent morse wasn’t too pleased, but they had it handled with alice.

“we can warn them at the bunker. alice, we’ve got you.” bobbi took the lead, leading her ex husband who had the weak, limping girl supported up the stairs and out of the old warehouse they had found alice in.

back at the quinjet, alice slumped in a jumpseat while agent morse cleaned her visible wounds while they waited for skye and may’s return. “he was going to hurt my sister. he was going to kill me in front of her.”

“no, he wasn’t and he won’t.” hunter had a soft spot for the young agent. from what he knew she was only twenty and he felt a fierce urge to keep her far away from all this even though she was bloody and broken as she was now. “we’ll find him again. now or later, he won’t lay a hand on you or your sister again.”

agent may and skye returned dusty and empty handed. “he’s gone” panted skye as she sat down across from alice. she almost didn’t want to look. she knew what ward was capable of, but just as she thought he wouldn’t hurt her, skye had thought he wouldn’t hurt alice either.

“we should be getting back. simmons will get you fixed up.” may was all business but there was a hint of softness in her voice as she set their course in the cockpit.

#kidnapping tw #torture tw #abuse mention #better stay clever . . . [ EXTENDED WRITINGS ]*#i saw you as a brother . . . [ GRANT WARD / general ]*

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