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thatdeadaquarius · 2 months

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College be kicking my ass but we continue on like Scaramouche (alive and kicking, but still crabby about it all lmfao)

Random idea but what happens when the acolytes got hold of Creator that is able to squeeze into small places (like a cat would but less liquid) and knows how to escape? Think of sagau but instead of all the deaths, its just they got overexited and chased the Creator the moment they see them which scared them shitless seeing a mob just appear out of nowhere.

I mean who wouldn't after seeing your favourite person in your favourite game just appear right in front of you? (I apologize in advance to the poor unfortunate sucker)

Imagine a world-wide search that keeps getting them heart attacks. Venti just flying by with Dvalin ony to see you on top of the floating pillar above Dragonspine LEANING PRECARIOUSLY OH MY ARCHONS GET AWAY FROM THE EDGE---

Zhongli walking around trying to find peace and quiet only to sense your presence which led him towards Azhdaha's domain and nearly shouted in terror seeing you hanging by one of the limestones above the slumbering dragon your grace what and how the in the fucking name of teyvat did you---

Yae Miko screaming in surprise seeing you inside one of the cupboards of your grace's house (you made a small temporary one in each country in case u need more rest) that she and Ei found in one of the remote islands.

Nahida and the entire Forest Rangers having one of the most intense, frustrating and most challenging game of hide and seek in the entire freaking forest.

You hiding underneath the sand like a fricking snake everytime Cyno spots you from a disrance.

-Vine Boom 🧨

I am no longer apologizing for lateness simply bc atp its basically assumed Im terribly sorry 💀 /so gen

Content under -----------------✄

☆

Sun: Reader, (you/they/them)

Orbit: Headcanons-ish, Imposter SAGAU? Imposter SAGAU Reversed Ver? unclear (NOT DARK)

Stars: little here, little there

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: reader/you thinks everyone is hunting them down, dark sagau fake-baiting lmao, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

No but the traumatic experience of you cautiously wandering into Mondstadt after realizing ur in Genshin like, ✨👄✨

and every single street/alleyway you try to go down to even avoid it is just people all looking at you like: 👁️👄👁️ ???

and ur over here equally just like: 😃 tf u lookin at????

u get up near the cathedral and finally see a playable character, Barbara, and she just fully GASPS and POINTS at you like she’s getting paid to be an actor for this

shouting sm nonsense like: “My Creator??? King of All???? IS THAT YOU?????”

and after which a few nuns check the commotion, Rosaria and Barbara’s Visions are glowing, and all join in heckling you

Venti coming (literally) flying around a corner on a breeze, saying he was trying to catch up to you, and ohhh now ur Convinced:

None of these bitches must be happy to see you, you did forcefully control their bodies if by the sounds of it they knew you/they must’ve been aware during the game, aw damn looks like u gotta run for your life now

You just book it out of Mond, Venti/Barbara yelling after you to come back, and meanwhile you’re leaving a shell-shocked Jean/Diluc/Kaeya (with Visions glowing) in ur wake on the way out

Not one being, mortal or otherwise, convinces you to stay in Mond, and you finally get to Dragonspine- the only place u know they wont follow

(well maybe the pyro characters but ur betting if u can make it up the mountain theyre not committed to,, running you down? arresting you?? ur not sure)

u make it all the way up and luckily everythings all solved like u did in the game, the traveler must be well into teyvat by now, and u decide to say “for the already achieved achievement” and fuck around and find out near the nail

U thought as u finally got on it u heard a scream somewhere in the sky, and u spotted Dvalin carrying Venti/Barbatos, and once again book it out of town (damn u cant believe theyre so committed they got the dragon in on it…)

so u haul ass all the way down the mountain, traveling only at night, living like a vampire, holing up during the day when u see Mond citizens/knights/gods/etc. walking around presumably looking for you

but u make it, finally! sweet, sweet Liyue, ur 2nd home (besides Mondstadt)

Only to immediately, like right outside the fucking gates to Liyue Harbor, run into Zhongli.

and he’s standing there like this mf knew u were coming, and the first thing out his mouth is some BS like, “…Darnell, that you??”/ref LMAOO

but instead of laughing abt it u just scream and run for your life haha

oh jesus h christ- he’s sending the adepti after you fuck- how hated are you??

sure u maybe hate Celestia a little, and sympathize with the traveler, but this seems a little extreme?!

you go to the one place u know he/any other adeptus doesnt like to come often, Azdaha’s cave

and after a night (well, day bc ur sleeping during the day now) of Azdaha sleeping peacefully, he wakes up fully coherent and u actaully have a rlly pleasant conversation with him about Liyue food lol

he also kept mentioning some kind of god? but like in reference to you?? are u connected to them, u kinda know a lot of gods atp so ur not sure which he means, a god to rule them all??? Celestia?? yeah u guess u know those fucks-

Cue u looking down from ur perch in the stalagmites above, u found a ledge and Azdaha helped you,

only to see a very concerned and borderline nervous Zhongli down below, Azhdaha just greets him like nothing’s wrong, but as soon as he sees you’re uncomfortable, helps you escape (more like teleport) away

(the old geo archon was probably nervous just be around Azhdaha u assume)

and now ur on the islands of Inazuma

u know exactly what islands are all but abandoned, the ghost one, the electrocuting one, and the scary bird one, all great options 👍

Raiden and Yae Miko manage to find you on every single one, with Yae getting more and more exasperated, and Ei getting more and more concerened with every position they find you in

hanging out on the banks of the electro river that would kill you if it weren’t for the little electro trees fending it off (thank fuck u maxed that shit out while in game)

bc u assumed they’d hate to be around it, plus lots of ronin- nope Ei is almost… scolding you?? oh but she’s got her Musou no Hitotachi out fuCK-

(she was slaying ronins that were getting too close to you)

she also is constantly jumpscaring you on tsurumi island/ghost island bc while the ghosts are gone, the creepy atmosphere isn't, and it makes her all the more terrifying as The Raiden Shogun comes walking out of the fog into the cave you've hidden in, stuff of ur nightmares for weeks as u just bird box style try to be silent and stealth around the island to get to an abandoned boat,

literally her scary ass purple sword glowing silhouette wandering around in the fog as you paddle away 💀

getting to thunder bird island and Yae Miko is literally both running/teleporting as quickly as she can to you, as you jump from floating rock to floating rock to escape her, god its so unnerving to watch someone so lazy running after you

she keeps getting in this weird “praising the heavens pose” sometimes when you jump, oh shit she’s aiming hER ATTACKS AT YOU THATS WHY-

oh good- she missed and deflected some stray debris coming ur way, u gotta get to the bird area and see if you can glide away (u managed to get a glider at some point thank fuck)

the bird is luckily on ur side against all these mfs trying to hunt u down (for controlling their bodies u guess) and flies u back to mainland teyvat

sumeru u thought would have the most mercy on u tbh, maybe fontaine bc Neuvillette only rlly cares if u break “fontaine” laws, maybe he wouldn't care to chase down a mortal like u over this

and nahida bc shes just nice

which is somewhat true, as you are acting like tarzan swinging around on vines and shit to escape the forest rangers

but she does show up in ur dreams, but shes just all foggy or distorted, u guess bc ur not of this world or smth??

and so it just unnerves u more, and u try to make it out to the desert, where at least there's no gods to worry about

mf ur hunkered down in a pyramid and see the shadowy shape of Cyno walking thru a sandstorm at you 💀

U dont kno how u got out of that one tbh, smth abt “king deshret made a plan for this” and left it behind for ppl to use to escape underground, sweet

And while Nahida and other eremites, scholars like Alhaitham/Kaveh/Dehya were looking around the desert sands, u slip by them

And u make it to the oasis at the edge of the desert, and steal an old rowboat to cross to fontaine (if i had a nickel everytime u needed to escape a god via old rowboat, youd have 2 nickels- )

and getting to Fontaine is not much better.

U literally get to the clockwork tower, foggy, ominous, uninhabited except for treasure-seekers occasionally, its perfect

until Neuvillette himself just strolls in abt 3 nights of u making camp there

u nearly shit urself as he just fake-knocked on a wall, meanwhile ur like hanging from the ceiling (four limbs out suspending you type of fictional shit)

luckily, mostly bc u were trying to wait him out (which wasn't possible ur limbs hurt so bad) he was, finally, the first person around u long enough to be genuinely kind and patient and answer questions

(Neuvillette acc couldn't figure out where u were at first, and was very confused how u got ur voice to boom around this chamber of the tower, after a minute of talking u trusted him enough to tell him to look up lol)

just in time too, he was able to hide u from the archons a little longer bc u were nervous

(u were already intimidated enough by Neuvillette being irl himself, talking to you, let alone all the other gods/vision users, as u realized afterwards thinking abt all the ppl trying to “hunt u down”, that if they all counted as ppl actually wanting to see you, that was a rlly overwhelming amount, esp if their first instinct is to run at you??? what are you, a fan-abused/disrespected kpop idol????)

☆

trying to be fancy and schedule posts once i get enough free time to actually wrangle my adhd to actually partake in my favorite hobbies 💀

well as long as I'm not getting slammed with lots of shifts again

hope u guys had a great weekend and have a good week! Happy late Valentine’s Day :)

Safe Travels Vine Boom,

💀♒

If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"

(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")

♡the Beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily / @justinsomniachild / @nanithefuck / @questionotmystopit

@kiyomi-uchiha777

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thegreencanary · 2 years

Text

Karen Wheeler Hate Club

Based on this request!

Paring: Billy Hargrove and Female Reader (established relationship)

TW: Cursing, Smoking, ADULTS BEING FUCKING GROSS. Minors this is a DNI cuz the adults are nasty. So go find Joyce and Hopper and get a story from them. A good safe bedtime story that doesn’t involve bored suburban moms who need to be in jail.

A/N: This is my work and I give no one the permission to post it on other sites or claim it as their own or do both of those things. Also Karen is gross for hitting on Billy and I will not take any questions at this time.

Also please take the Trigger Warnings seriously!Mental health first babes.

It’s a short one, just a little one shot!

Fuming wasn't a word that would describe you often, but today it fit perfectly. The sun was out but the fact that Karen Wheeler was trying to pick up your boyfriend was making you burn. Billy didn't mind, and at first he really liked it but once the two of you started dating he had backed off the flirting. Sure he was older and hotter than the high school boys at Hawkins, but Nancy was literally his age and she even got on her mom about it. You huffed as Karen tossed her head back laughing at something Billy said. He was just being nice, which means he was being a huge flirt. That boy had two settings, mad as hell and flirty as fuck. .The past few months you'd seen a different side to him with the Upside Down showing you different things about all your friends, you eventually developed feelings for Billy. No matter how sweet he was to you, he knew how much you hated Karen Wheeler. Grabbing your bag you almost jumped out of your lawn chair when you saw Steve enter the pool. He could take over watching the kids, you weren't going to stick around and watch someones MOM hit on your freaking boyfriend.

"Hey Y/N! Wh--"

"El is in the bathroom, everyone else is in the deep end. Have fun. Bye."

You cut Steve off and he looked so confused. His eyes followed yours and the sight of Karen looking up at Billy while he was on the lifeguard chair was all he needed to understand.

"See you later."

"Yeah."

There was some commotion behind you as you stormed out, only to feel a strong hand on your arm; stopping you.

"Where are you going babe?"

"Home...or maybe to Nancy's house to tell her dad that his wife is a pervert."

Billy sighed, he thought your jealousy was funny and a little cute but now it was clear that you didn't find it either of those things. He lit a cigarette and tried to talk to you.

"I get it, I can't exactly tell her to fuck off at work thought."

"It's fine Billy. I get it. Hot mom and everyone wants her. Well you can fucking have her then."

You ripped your arm away from Billy and stormed off. You heard him cussing behind you and saying you were over reacting but you didn't care. Later that night you got a phone call from Billy. He wasn't one for apologizing but he talked to you a bit about everything and you explained your side as well. The two of you made up under the rule that he wouldn't entertain Mrs. Wheeler at all. That was what was supposed to happen, yet Karen didn't seem to get the message that he wasn't interested. Every damn day she was at the pool waiting for Billy, wearing new swim suits and makeup...who fucking wears makeup to go swimming? You reached your limit when you went on your lunch break from work to eat with Billy and there she was, standing too close to Billy and trying to put her nasty hands all over her. The rage you felt carried your feet to Billy and you stepped in front of Karen, placing a big kiss on Billy's lips. He smirked and wrapped his hands around your waist, pulling you in tighter.

A moment or two passed and you separated, looking at Karen with spite in your eyes.

"I'm sorry, was I interrupting?"

"Not at all baby, Mrs. Wheeler was just asking about swim lessons."

That fucking bitch.

"Huh. Mike and Nancy swim great, just like their mom!"

A deviously innocent smile crawled across your face as you saw Karen step back in defeat.

"Yeah...its for a friend. She never really learned..."

"I'm sure she would fit right in to the group classes. After all, it's a little weird for someone your age to be spending alone time with teenagers, isn't it?"

Billy squeezed your side playfully. The smile on this face was of pure awe. You were a force to be reckoned with and he fucking loved it.

"I...I suppose so. Thank you for the information Billy. I'll see you around."

"I'm always at work."

He responded nicely but it was clear there was NOTHING more to feed the delusional Karen Wheeler. Once she was out of sight, Billy picked up where you two left off from the kiss and a blush reached your toes.

"Billy! People can see..."

"That didn't stop you before baby. You're so fucking hot when you're mad."

"Well don't make me mad like that again or you'll be the one I'm bitching at."

"You're cute when you think you can scare me."

He smirked and grabbed your ass. This lunch was going to be very quick.

#billy hargrove #billy hargrove x reader #billy stranger things #billy x reader #stranger things #billy could have been saved #billy x you #billy deserved better #billy hargrove x female reader #billy hargrove x you #karen wheeler hate club #Karen wheeler is gross #HES A LITERAL STUDENT #YOUR DAUGHTER IS THE SAME AGE #GROSS KAREN #GROSS

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deerfour · 2 years

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Assassin Born From Fire - Part One

Pairing: Peter Parker x fem!reader

Warnings: Mention of behind held at gunpoint, torture, mention of death, trauma, blood, injuries, swearing

Summary: It's not easy to live a double life at a facility that wants to use you to get people killed when one part of you loves to, and the other one hates it.

Word Count: 6.4k

Series Masterlist: Here!

~~Part One~~

The only thing that made you terrified was yourself.

Not the way you were, or the way you looked, or the idea of you having the powers of a thousand suns, but the change. How you could go from being a terrified child to a killer without a warning.

It scared the shit out of you every time you woke up and the memories floated back to the surface to give you one more sleepless night. Every time a mission was being put your way, it often ended that way if it wasn't something simple. It was almost never something simple.

The thing that was even more terrifying was that there was absolute nothing you could do about it.

It was those changes that made you the ultimate weapon for others to use as their own, but at the same time it made you the weakest of all warriors. You could kill without thinking twice, or you could crumble to pieces. That was the reason why you never got out on a mission by yourself, why someone held you under constant guard at all times. There was not a point when someone wasn't watching every step you took, every decision you made or every breakdown you had.

You were never alone, but still felt lonely at all times.

Although that was the case not even torturing the scared part of you was enough to keep you doing the job. There was no part of you that could do such a thing. It didn't matter that they had handed you a gun, pointed at a man and ordered you to kill him. After hours of being beaten and left in the dark for not listening to orders you couldn't bring that side of you forward when you had control.

You couldn't do it.

You couldn't kill.

Your reality was a maze of emotions that you gladly avoided. Some days nothing made sense and you just wanted to escape everything, just for it to turn around on one foot and you changed completely. You wanted to prove a point that was hidden in the mist. There was a darkness inside that grew for every time you pulled yourself through a mission and succeeded. But, when the other side of you was triggered, everything fell back to zero.

The first times it had happened you had been curling into a ball, or singing silently to yourself in a corner. Those had been failed attempts to calm yourself down and take you back to the times of smiles and laughter to avoid the stern looks and the radiating pain. Other times you would stare into the wall in waiting for something to happen to get your mind thinking. That didn't happen way too often though. But as the years passed you got used to it. The guilt after every mission she had succeeded with because she never failed.

The scarred child had grown up to a woman that hadn't changed. You had learned, but never changed. You could never in your life kill someone, but you would follow all other orders. If it was going undercover and infiltrating a system, or if it was to interrogate a prisoner. You would do it. Torture someone for days, or weeks, to get them to follow orders that higher ranks had been given them. You would do it. Sit for hours and listen to the screams of children as they were being put into such trauma that most of them died. You could endure.

Everything but killing.

It was a weird thing. To, for a moment, feel like you were a good person that just did your job, that followed your orders. That was the way it had always been and there was no reason for it to change when you got older. But to suddenly turn into a killer that didn't think twice. That made your head spin and nausea hit you without a second thought. How could such a thing freak you out when you had fought agents of all kinds? How could a slight change in your own personality make you want to cry when you had endured so much the past years?

If they wanted someone dead, they needed the other half. The uncontrollable half. The half that could kill anyone at any point. The half that you were terrified of. The half that left you with pieces that you needed to pick up and put together as best you could on your own. The half that returned whenever she felt like it was her time to shine. The half that they loved, because she had no stopping her.

When she took over it was like everything was a game and nothing mattered but the killing and the chaos. To see things getting destroyed and blown up was like a party for that half. When people screamed because of pain she laughed and you remembered that feeling. To feel happy and delighted by someone's pain, and it hurts even more than watching three year old's being tested on. She loved to take over and show her face. But for you, it was terrifying.

They didn't care about you enough to help you endure the aftermath of being locked up with your own thoughts. The only thing they cared about was getting through with their plans that you only knew the third part of, and they were never clear what exactly was expected. To ask questions was properly handled with different methods, whether it was being starved or burnt from the inside or ripped apart by blades was always a surprise to not look forward to. Simple enough, they threw you into a cell after the killing was done, letting you sleep for a day or two before you were yourself again. When that was done you either spent weeks alone in the dark, trained with guards or were being handed missions that didn't require killing. That was until they needed her.

If they needed that other part they could trigger it in a matter of seconds, and they knew that there was a risk of them dying every time, but it was worth it. According to them. According to you? It was a nightmare.

A nightmare that never ended, and the only way to escape for just a little bit was to either let the destruction follow or follow orders. If none of those were possible you would ask for some time to train your skills under supervision. Sometimes you were lucky and got to train for as long as you wished, and other times you got nothing but spit in the face back. During the long winter nights in a stone cell, where your only roommates were blood puddles that weren't all yours and rats that sometimes crawled across your body during the night, you often found yourself in a thinking space that left you feeling empty.

Today was such a day.

You had been locked up for what seemed to be two days with only two cups of water and some bread to keep you occupied. Several times you had asked for the opportunity to go train, but had been neglected every time, no one cared to hear your plea. Even if you couldn't tell time, you were pretty sure it had been two days from what you heard of the change of guards outside. Every third hour they changed guards, that was something you had picked up during a meeting several years from now. With that information you were able to tell the time, at least some of the times. After hours of being drugged to sleep you had no idea how many days had passed by, and you could only make guesses. Same when you slept because you chose to. Guards always stood right outside. Keeping you looked over if a less pleasant part came into view.

The door screeched open, but you kept your eyes slightly closed when the light from the hall hit your face. You hugged your knees to keep the little warmth that you could gather as your head was leaned back against the wall behind you. Footsteps came closer, one person, carrying the usual weapons of a guard, which included both a gun and a taser for long distance and if an attacker got close enough. Even if you couldn't hear it you knew that the guard was holding a needle in one of his hands that he probably held behind his back. But you kept your eyes closed, knowing that it was just a guard. You had heard it enough times to pick up if something were to be different from the usual, and if it was you were always prepared. After years of training and discipline you could perform hand to hand combat with blind eyes.

It was easy to tell which ones were guards and who were directors. Mainly because directors always announced their presence to get everyone saluting them, but also because guards sounded more when they walked with their uniforms and weapons. Never have you heard an intruder who came long enough to get into the cells and escape alive. They simply couldn't. That was one thing you knew from trying to escape several times during your time spent in this prison of a home. Like the first time when you had--

A hand grabbed over your arm and you snapped your eyes open, meeting the guard's. His brown eyes were capturing, his jaw sharp and clenched from what it looked like and his blonde hair was slicked back over his head. You had never seen the guard before.

He had never met you either because he thought you were sleeping. As he jumped back in surprise you chuckled deep in your throat. You couldn't count how many times that had happened when new guards had been getting the mission to take you somewhere or deliver something to you. It always worked. That was the funny part. Two other guards from outside scrambled inside and picked you up from the floor, keeping you standing by grasping your arms. You knew both of them. One being the general for your department from what you had heard, and the other one of the usual with his sparkling blue eyes, making you think of water. That's why you called him Water-boy every time you got the chance, and the best part was how offended he looked when you mentioned your nickname for him. Their gloves left marks that would sit for a few hours after this, but it was nothing that hurt you anymore. You grinned from ear to ear.

Both of the guards had their weapons ready to be drawn, not knowing which part had woken up. The first guard stepped in front of you, staring down at you where you stood grinning like an idiot while biting your tongue, still thinking how you had scared him. How he had been ready for the other half to be the one he had approached, and the way he had almost dropped his face in the thought of meeting her without a weapon in hand. That was a show if anything. That actually might be the only thing you could like about that half, that everyone kept their distance and gave you space. That it was because of fear was more of an unpleasant detail, but it didn't matter to you anyways. You'd rather them to fear you than to underestimate you.

You let yourself memorize his face, just like you had done with everyone else. His nose that looked like it had been broken one too many times. Eyebrows plucked uneven, leaving the right one a little thicker than the other, just so slightly. The way his brown eyes turned serious the moment he stared down at you, trying to scare you with his stare.

This one was new. Interesting.

He looked at the two guards holding you and when they nodded for him to proceed he picked up a flashlight from his pocket. The new guard forcefully opened your right eye and put the light into your eye. It stung as usual, but it didn't hurt like it used to. Just as he stared into your eye you suddenly moved towards him and he jumped once more. He was tense in his entire body and it made you chuckle under your breath, the two guards beside you just holding tightly before motioning for the guard to continue. They didn't have all day standing here holding you in their arms when they had a whole facility to watch over. After he checked the other eye he nodded and both guards let go of you. Making you let out a sigh through your nose so they wouldn't hear it.

"You are very lucky today," the new guard spoke in a harsh tone.

"Is it my birthday or something?" you raised an eyebrow.

You actually didn't know when your birthday was, date or month or year was oblivious to you, but you knew that when the day came you got beaten. That was at least what they told you at the facility. 'It's your birthday today, you're very lucky', and then they kicked your ass without you being able to do anything about it. You had nothing else to believe, so you tried your best to count the days, see the temperature changes and maybe figure out at least a month. You had tried for nothing, because as the years passed you lost count on everything and all turned into a tornado that was too much of a battle to take care of for the moment.

One step at the time.

"Not that lucky," the guard from your left muttered, having been one of those who had delivered a yearly bruise over your eye.

"You're meeting with the head director. He has a mission for you," the first guard continued, ignoring the muttering from his coworker.

"Lucky me," you mumbled loud enough for the guards to hear the sarcasm covering your tone.

Water-boy glanced your way with a raised eyebrow, while the others just looked at you like you were insane. Even if it might be the case, you continued to stare down the newbie, making him feel as uneasy as you could by just being in your presence. The general was so used to seeing your gazes that he didn't even care about it, and instead sighed loudly at his time running away from him. New guard boy turned on the spot before one more of your comments entered the room, and he walked out into the dimly lit hallway. For a second you hesitated, but it was enough for the general to get impatient, so he grabbed your arm and launched you out into the corridor. If you only could fight back you would, but with your powers bound there was no use since the corridor outside was full with dozens of guards. You could never fight so many of them. Instead you followed the new guard and held your head high, not letting the fear invade your system.

The corridor's walls were covered with, not only guards that stared you down, but also doors made out of the thickest iron and steel in the world. Nothing could get through them. As you let your gaze travel over the doors you silently prayed to a god that had never heard you before that those inside of those doors would be freed from this prison some day. You knew perfectly well that there was someone behind each and everyone of those doors that divided the ranks at the facility. They were all different kinds of people, all from small children from this world to the next, and there were elders that had given up on their life but had no choice but to continue fighting. At first when you had arrived here you had thought you were all alone and the only one that knew of this pain, but when the night fell and you heard the cries of pain you knew you were incorrect. There were others. People who got treated just as bad, if not worse, than you. So, every time you get the chance you let your heart get dedicated to them; to somehow save them mentally. Their cries were nothing that bothered you anymore. You just slept through them, and tried your best to not think about how those screams would haunt you for the rest of your short life.

At the end of the corridor the guard locked it up with his green eyeball as a security code, and the door clicked open. You had seen this door unlocked a million times, but it still made your heart jump when you saw the halls beyond. They were a familiar place to you that wasn't special in any way, but the way the cold always seemed to linger there even during the winter gave you goosebumps. The corridors made out of stone and steel to keep you away from reality led through the facility to get to the administration offices. Just because they changed their appearance didn't mean that they gave you less creeps than before. Not only did the general and Water-boy walk at your sides but you were followed by nine guards that walked in unison. On your way there you tried your best not to think about what the mission could be, but you had your suspicions. At the end of the hall that turned left and right a few times that you didn't need to count, you reached three elevators that got you out from the dungeons. Following the new guard you got inside with five other guards that you had seen before at some point, one of them being a woman with an ugly scar that leaped from her forehead, through her eye and down to her chin. Making her blind in the right eye. Still, she fought with her other senses, which made her just as good as anyone else.

Your gut turned as you felt yourself going up, and even as it had happened so many times before you felt your knees buckle and if it hadn't been for the general and Water-boy you would've fallen to the floor. The walls in the elevator were made out of glass, which gave you the opportunity to look at the passing corridors. One being a familiar one. The way up you passed the medical bay where you could spot a man with an open wound screaming for help he didn't get. He had not been given any painkillers and you knew that he wouldn't be given anything any time soon. Either he would die by bleeding out, or he would die later by an infection. If he was strong he might survive a little longer, but from the way you could see his lungs from just a second of passing by made you realize that it would not happen. It was nothing you hadn't seen before, but it still aches in your chest, even if you keep staring without letting them know that the feelings are flattering around inside. They could never know your weakest point. That was a request for trouble, and them thinking that you were slowly turning into the warrior they desired.

A few floors upwards you came to the halls of the laboratories where you had spent hours strapped to a bed while they took blood from your veins. People in lab coats paused as they saw who was going up, and their eyes grew wide. Whatever that meant was their own business. You didn't care what they thought about you, or what the rumors said. That you were a killer was not a surprise, you just wished they could see the difference between a killer and a victim. So, when an old man that had been haunting your nights as a child saw you without giving away his fear you grinned. Nobody noticed the quick interaction between the two of you, but you knew that he was onboard with what you had just indicated. In a day or two he would ask for more tests being taken from you, but you didn't regret it.

As you, finally, got to the administration floor, which was way more sophisticated than the rest of the facility. It was weird how every part of the building looked so incredibly different, from the dungeon's gray stone walls to the plywood walls of the office where the only colors were wooden and black. It looked just as much as a prison as the one you were kept in. As the doors to the elevator opened the leading guard walked out, almost knocking straight into one of the workers that were currently holding a lot of papers in his arms. All of them fell to the floor, but as he was about to complain, you stepped out and he closed his mouth. Your mouth corners twitched as he began picking up his papers while his round glasses were sitting askew at the bridge of his nose, his black hair messy and the brown eyes keeping a target that was the floor. From what you could determine from his appearance he looked like he was in his forties, but of course you could not know for sure. If you were honest you knew that you were one of the best to identify people in the branch, and nobody could say anything else. There was a reason why you went undercover most of the ones the facility had in their grasp.

The guards didn't stop until you had taken thirty-five steps forward, made one left turn and then taken fourteen steps more. The newbie knocked on a big double door that opened just as he took a step back. You knew that inside stood two guards keeping the director under constant coverage to make sure that he was safe from enemies. From enemies that had become mine just as well as his. All of you stepped inside the grand office with bookshelves covering one of the walls, with at least a hundred copies, and the other wall had a fireplace with a pair of leather armchairs in front. The fire was lit and sparkled in your eyes as you let your gaze linger there for a moment, before facing the wooden desk in the middle of the room. A man, that you knew all too well, sat behind it reading through papers, not looking up as you approached. He eyed his papers, picking out a few to place on his left, while most of them were replaced in a drawer he had opened on his right. The head director didn't look up as you left the guards saluting to sit down in one of the black leather chairs before the desk.

"Leave us," he ordered, the guards thinking twice.

You were never left alone.

Not even for a moment, and definitely not with the head director in your grasp.

"Are you understanding English, general?" the man in a gray suit asked, still looking through his paper and writing a few things down in a notebook beside him.

"Ye- yes," the impatient guard that had been showing no signs of weakness just a moment ago, stammered.

"Then, what did I say?"

His voice was like a knife that cut through the air. A smirk crossed my lips as I gazed at the guard, which only made him gulp and open his mouth without any words leaving him. It was laughable. That little power that the director had of everyone, the power that was all that needed to be reminded about to make someone shake in fear. It was hilarious.

"You said 'leave us'," he reported, his gaze averting to yours once more and you saw the anger linger behind his dilated pupils.

"And who is following orders around here?"

"Me," he sighed. "But, she--"

"Will not hurt me. She knows better. I guess you checked her before bringing her up," he let his gaze rise to the guard, making him sweat.

"Yes, sir," he gulped before he signaled to the rest of the guards to leave you alone with the director.

You grinned at the newbie before he turned and walked after the rest of the guards that had already left the office. The ones that had been keeping the director under guard also left, making the office suddenly turn incredibly silent as the door closed behind them. You wanted to laugh at the way the general had been nervously picking around his collar as if he couldn't breath, but instead you turned around to face the director. The man with brown hair, that slowly turned gray as his suit from aging, stood up and began to walk around his desk. His eyes were locked with yours, but you just stared him down without a flinch even though you wanted to curl up in a corner.

"You are getting a new mission today. The most important one in your career."

Career, you wanted to mutter, but instead you kept your silence and leaned yourself backwards, putting your hands behind your head to keep him talking. Either this would end in a reasonable mission that could give you something in return, or it would be a one-time thing that wouldn't give you shit. One of your eyebrows got raised as he chuckled and sat down at the front of his desk before you. He knew that you wouldn't go along with any missions willingly if there was a killing part. Still, if that was the case he would just bring her out and she would burn the whole world, not caring about anything else than the flames. His eyes were a little narrowed from the chuckle, his arms crossed over his chest, and the wrinkles across his face slowly smoothed.

"We need you to go undercover for us, get us intel and then report back here. At the end of the deal, you'll kill the target."

"I won't kill."

You answered quicker than he thought you would, taking him aback, but only for a second before a smirk covered his thin lips. It was three simple words that didn't like being heard by anyone, but you said them nonetheless. You didn't care about what he thought about that one weakness. The weakness that forced him to bring out the messier part of you if he wanted something done. When you began telling him that you wouldn't kill for him he had been beating you personally, but as the years passed he let others do it. Every time there was a beating when you refused. He just waited for you to break enough for him to not have to make you do as you were told through violence. It took his time.

"I know that, believe me," he chuckled and looked you straight in the eyes, burning into your orbs. "But this is different. This mission is special for you and your work here."

"Continue," you spoke as he paused.

"Is it interest I'm hearing?"

"Impatience," you corrected him without moving a muscle.

"Very well then. You will not be having any guards watching over you this time."

"What?"

It didn't mean to sound like you were surprised, but you couldn't hide it in your voice. You cursed yourself mentally afterwards when you saw the cold smile that crept over his wrinkly face. Long ago you had learned that surprise was enough for your enemy to know weakness. The easiest way to bring someone down was to use surprise against them, and even if you knew this better than anyone, this made you still let your chin drop. He clicked his tongue to make this more dramatic than what it actually was. A minute ticked down that felt like an hour. Was he seriously letting you out on a mission on your own? Without any guards watching you from a distance to make sure that you didn't try to flee. This was something new. And that meant that there was a catch. There was always a catch when it came to the director.

"It's too risky. We can't have you being discovered, and people sneaking too close to the Avengers Compound will raise suspicion."

"Avengers Compound?"

You had heard about the Avengers on several occasions during your time in imprisonment. They were the thing that stood between the facility and getting full power, but taking them out had been shown to be harder than they had first thought. It seemed like a new idea had arised, and you didn't like the sound of that for some reason. Other than them being complete assholes to the organization, you knew that one of their heroes had been the Winter Soldier. One of the strongest warriors from the facility. Made into the ultimate weapon with mind control and a code to make him do anything. It had been an experiment that had been prepared to be done to others. You included. Sadly it never did.

"You will go undercover as an intern there, and find everything we want to know about their plans, and how much they know of us. You will be there for as long as needed, and we have found a place for you to live during your time there since coming back here every day might be a bit of a journey."

It sounded reasonable, but you didn't trust this yet. Something was not adding up to you. If you were just getting inside as an intern to find information, then why would you need to kill? There was no reason if the only thing he looked for was facts, because that was something you could gather easily.

"So, what do you say?" he asked as you stared at him, drowning in your thoughts.

You looked him in the eyes, knowing there was something he didn't say. Something he was hiding to make this mission easier, and hiding things that you might want to know was never a good idea. You would find the clues to his secrets and find out what he was keeping away from you to keep his ship sailing. Secrets were nothing you had ever appreciated. But at the same time this mission was the first one you would go out on your own. Something you had dreamed to be able to do since the first one you ever went to. After failure and successes you had never gotten this big of an opportunity, and that was something new, something that you wished for. To wish for things here was not a wise choice in life. But you had nothing to lose except for your life, and that was not much to keep protected in the first place. The freedom of being alone in the real world was calling your name, and it made the decision even harder to make.

"How will I report back here if I won't be seeing you any time soon?"

"Simple," the man spoke and got back to his side of the desk.

Phones would've been the easy answer, but they were traceable. The facility never worked with things that were traceable. Too risky. You leaned forwards with your elbows on your knees as you glanced his way. He opened a drawer and pulled out a small little metallic device that was round with an octopus on the top. You felt a chill run down your spine, but he still handed the device your way. Without thinking twice you took it from him. The metal felt cold in your warm hands as you looked at it while the man explained.

"You just simply push the button at the right side and you will call my office," as he said this you pushed the bottom and a similar looking device beeped at his desk. He placed his finger across the octopus and a hologram appeared over it showing your face and half your upper body, currently looking at something. It scared you seeing that face, making you gasp and throw the device across the desk. You could imagine him smiling, not reaching his eyes, but your gaze was trapped at the hologram.

The device landed before the man and he appeared on the other device as well, the one you were staring down. You gasped slightly at how detailed it was, showing all in such a close up that it was impossible to miss out on something. When you gazed back at the one you had been holding it now also showed a hologram, you. It showed both ways. You stood up from the chair and walked around the one that had been on his desk in the first place, but it still showed you. It was showing in all directions. Showing everything with a pulse and warmth to it.

"Something wrong?" he asked, and you felt a sting at the back of your neck.

"No, everything's fine. Who am I assigned to kill?"

He seemed surprised by the question, showing by his body stiffening a little bit, short enough for someone with an untrained eye to look through, but for you. It was clear that he thought you would actually do it. He should know better than that at this point in your deal. The thought of your freedom didn't make you spin that far away. You didn't kill, but followed all other orders without questions. That was the deal for you to keep this little part of yourself standing.

"Tony Stark."

"Iron Man?"

Even here you knew who the famous Tony Stark was. The richest man in all of the United States, might even be the whole world. You had just heard him during a few meetings during brief conversation, and at some point you had gotten your hands on a file about him that you just read the first page off.

"Yes, Iron Man. The one owning the Avengers Facility, or compound, or whatever they wanna call that stone block. I need him gone for my project to be complete. It's your mission to get him out of my way so I can continue without having to worry about him disturbing me."

He sounded bitter. Not focused on what you would say at the moment, giving you the perfect opportunity to slink in a simple question that you hoped wouldn't raise any suspicion.

"And what's your project?"

Somewhere you knew that you wouldn't get an answer to that question, but you still wanted him to tell you more. Maybe you could get him to crack what he was hiding, if only for a moment so that you could read his feelings. This game was being played well from his side, but you needed to win. For once, you needed to win to know if it was worth it.

If the freedom was worth it.

This might be the mission of your lifetime, just as he had spoken. You hated that truth, and you hoped for all your life that it was a lie, even if you knew that it wasn't. This would determine your whole future here. If it went well you would be treated with respect, and might even rise in the ranks for the first time in several years. There was also a possibility that you would fail the director, which would leave him with no choice but to put you down once again.

Just as he had done a million times before.

"Stupid question," he simply spoke before a burning pain ran through your body, before you got a moment to read anything from his body language.

From the randomness of the lightning that spread across your body you fell down to your knees, letting out a yelp in pain. You didn't mean for the sudden scream to erupt from within, but being unprepared for your blood being boiled from within, hurt more than you could remember. If you had been prepared you would've been able to hold in the screams for at least a minute before the tingling would've gotten to you. There was no way you could ignore the pain that pierced your skin when it came out of nowhere. It streamed up and down your body, thousands of nails biting at your skin, trying to poke a hole into it. Your hands turned into fists that you lost the feeling of first. The numbness traveling up your arms. Your screams echoed through the administration offices, but no one cared. The ones that bothered to stop for a moment didn't try to find you. There was never someone looking.

"Are you ready for the mission, assassin?"

The question was hard to hear when the only thing in your ears was beeps and crackling, and the burning of your own skin crawling across you, eating at your brain. Still, you could hear the words as if they were being told straight into your head. There was no way for you to handle the question and get up with an answer as your body twitched and you fell to the floor. Suddenly it stopped and you breathed for air, trying to collect yourself, and getting ready for one more zap. It didn't come. You were just laying there, defeated on the floor, and you tried to think through his question, but it had disappeared. If you didn't get up and said something he wanted to hear it would come back. Your skin burning in a way that you could never manage to do on your own.

So, instead of standing your ground to prove something that wasn't worth the time, you got up. You rose from the ground, slowly but surely as your body was harder to control. Being numb in your fingers, toes and calves made it impossible to get up completely on your feet. Instead, you looked up at him from beneath your hair that had been falling in your eyes. He had a smirk on his face, knowing that you would agree to this. You would follow through, even if you didn't kill him. You would find the information they needed and then they would let her escape. With heavy breaths you let your eyes gaze over to the hologram that showed a clear picture of the director that smirked your way. Knowing that he had defeated you once again, and that there was nothing you were going to do against it. Knowing this, you locked eyes with him through the hologram and let one word escape your lips.

"Always."

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moremysteriesthantragedies · 1 year

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The Radiant Sun

Word Count: 758 words Rating: PG-13 POV: Quince, first-person, past tense.

Trigger warnings: Intense metaphors, abandonment issues

"It's so freaking cold here, did your heater break or something?" Bradi asked me as I pulled down a box of blankets. He was sitting on my black satin couch, limbs curling into a contorted ball. It had, actually. Truthfully, "broke" was a nice way of putting it. I believed a considerably annoying rascal had crawled into my basement, and, unfortunately, my poor precious heater was a victim in the crossfire. What a mess.

Keep reading

"Yes, unfortunately, but don't worry, I have the solution!" I said, dramatically opening the box and he rolled his eyes. "Would you just give me one already? A warm one, not those flimsy, sorry excuses for a blanket."

"Of course, princess. I'll tell the others to do better," I said playfully with a wink. I grabbed a particularly fuzzy one (What? I can like cute things) and carefully brought it over. He'd throw a fit if it touched the ground.

I wrapped it around his exposed shoulders, gently brushing those dizzying spots as I did so. I could feel the trembling of life underneath my fingers as I touched his skin, then rubbed it with the blanket in an attempt to spark warmth. If he loathed the cold so much, he really shouldn't wear so many crop tops all the time. Not that I was complaining. He looked up at me with caramel eyes, freckles dropped into a pool of lava as the whole area across his nose reddened.

"Y-you don't have to go that far," he complained, wrapping the blanket tighter around him and I let go. How can someone simultaneously be so loud yet so shy? He looked like a vanilla swiss roll. "I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable, darling,” I said, pausing to ensure the apology wasn’t missed, “Is that all, my sweet roll? Are you still cold? I could make you some warm tea, or heat up some towe-" I was quickly interrupted by Bradi grabbing my tie.

"Don't leave!" he said in a shame spreading on his face as he let go, "I mean, it's still cold. Be a gentleman and...come over here for goodness sake." He opened up his blanket and patted the space next to him. I smirked widely. Well, if he insisted. I leaped over the back of the couch, slipping into the space next to him and putting the "blanket burrito" back into order. With our closeness, our arms rubbed against each other, my dress shirt easily gliding off his sun-kissed skin. Even now he looked as if he had been lying under the sun, face turning as peach as a burn. My body immediately felt like it had been sitting next to a heater, his skin melting through my shirt and causing my very blood to begin to boil.

He reached for my wrist, pulling up my hand and looking at the now still thing. He looked at me for permission and I simply nodded, allowing him to delicately pull off its leather glove. He tugged on each finger until they were all loosened, then pulled it off. He slid his perfectly manicured hand into my wonderfully exposed palm, balling the thing so it would fit there perfectly. I wrapped my fingers around it, capturing it in the pale shelter. He closed his eyes, the golden glow on them shining, though that could never replace the deep brown underneath. Oh no, it wasn't just that he was kissed by the sun, he was the sun, blinding me in every conceivable way.

"You're so warm," he hummed, bringing our hands to his cheek. What a beautiful speckled star. "You always look so dead, I thought you'd be freezing, yet it melts me so nicely. You're like dry ice..." he said, then dropped off tiredly, leaning more into the touch. Any metaphor he planned to say would be lost in those luscious lips, which gently brushed against my knuckles. I just stared, hand twitching slightly as I let the words slip from his mouth and burrow into my skin. I wasn't certain why, but his words shook me to the core. I couldn't help but constantly wonder...

Why did I find it so surprising?

No, it wasn't what Bradi thought. It was simple, really. The sun always shone against the moon, heating it up and causing it to glow. It was so glorious, a fraction of its beauty reflected onto something else. It was that radiant. Yes, it was all the sun's work, and, truthfully, the moon was nothing but a hard, cold rock.

#tw abandonment issues #wip one shot #one shot #infernal serenade #sweetpeaches🍑#lemons🍋

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stardustbarbarians · 2 years

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I Hear the River Say Your Name

Chapter 4 (ch. 1 | ch. 2 | ch. 3 | ch. 5 | ch. 6 | ch. 7)

A Josh Kiszka / fem!reader fic

Summary: Even before you were dating, you and Josh had been friends for years. You didn't see anything changing between you anytime soon. Then one day, you wake up and Greta Van Fleet doesn't exist and Josh isn't your boyfriend.

Tags: lots of exposition, angst, someone you know and love finally being added into the fray

Trigger Warnings: addiction, struggling with sobriety, drug abuse

Words: 4.7 k

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You were floating in a pure black void. You had no idea how long you’d been suspended in this terrifying all-enveloping obsidian shroud, but it had felt like an entrinity. You had long forgotten what the reason behind throwing yourself into this sunless abyss was, in fact you had begun to forget your own name.

Sunless…

There was something connected to that word and your name, you just didn’t know what. There was a slight urge to pursue that train of thought, but ultimately you only wanted to get lost in the allencompasing inky noir. All your worries had vanished along with the light in that realm. It was hard to have anxiety over something when it simply didn’t exist.

Sunny

Immediately, you were reminded why you were in that endless void. You were on a mission to find the love of your life, to seek out the answers on how to get back to Josh. The fear of failure reignited in your veins, your sense of purpose reinstated into your mind. Veda’s departing words whispered in your brain as you struggled to remain calm.

“...you have to remain focused on your goal… focus on finding the Josh from your realm…”

Right, that’s all you had to do. Thinking about your Joshie was easy, you did it every day already. Already you were picturing his warm smile in your mind, the way he seemed to shine brighter than the sun warming your heart. His curly hair was soft under your touch, bouncing back into place as you gently stretched out a curl at the crown of his head. You harkened back to the last date you two went on before he went away to tour, a bittersweet longing in your chest.

You had gone ice skating together, laughing the entire time as the both of you could hardly stay upright for more than a few seconds at a time. You hadn’t smiled that much in a while and your cheeks had begun to hurt. A few fans had come up to you guys and asked for pictures and Josh lit up each time, causing you to light up. His happiness was always so contagious and boisterous. You ended such a perfect day in each other’s arms, just holding one another as much as you could before he was whisked away by the call of his job and the love he harbored for it.

The more you concentrated, the less it felt like you were an aimless soul just wandering the ether. Slowly, that cold and impersonal void began to feel more like the way Josh’s embrace did. In fact, you were so caught up in thinking about Josh that you managed to trick your brain into hearing his voice.

“I miss her so much.”

Except, it didn’t sound like he was in front of you, rather he was physically in your head. It was as if he managed to bypass your skull and speak into your mind. Under normal circumstances, you would’ve freaked out. However, that was probably the most tame thing to happen to you within the past 48 hours.

“I miss you too, Joshie,” you respond, your voice catching in your throat.

“Sunny?” he called out, almost as if he was responding to your voice. “Is that you?”

Sluggishly, the image of Josh standing near what looked to be Lake Huron under the stars began to take shape in front of you. He was barefoot in the sand, wearing his pajamas of loose boxers and a ratty old t-shirt with your high school’s name on it. The most bizarre thing about him, though, was the fact that he was looking directly at you.

“Josh? Can-Can you see me?” you ask, your tone hopeful. You didn’t realize you were playing with the hem of your shirt, but Josh did. It had always been a nervous tick of yours that he found so endearing.

“I can, baby. I can.” His response wasn’t as enthusiastic as you had thought it would be.

Josh began laughing bitterly. It made a confusing mix of concern and fear lance through your chest as he smiled ruefully at the ground and shook his head.

“I knew it was a bad idea to smoke before going to sleep,” he sourly growled under his breath.

“Josh, it’s really me. You’re not dreaming - I mean you might be, but I’m really me.”

He scoffed at that. “Right. Next you’re gonna tell me that ‘death is an illusion’ or whatever.”

Frustrated at his lack of belief in you, you walk closer to him. Without saying a word, you hold up your palm to him as a signal for him to copy you. While he was reluctant to do so (evident by the look he shot you and the knit in his brow), he followed the silent command. Attempting to press your hands together, yours ghosted right through his and turned transparent. Where his fingers were poking through your once solid skin, electric blue sparks that looked like dozens of lighting strikes webbed out from where the two of you made contact.

You felt the electricity that was visible in front of you shooting out from his touch, making you gasp. He seemed to feel it too, a yelp escaping his lips as he was transfixed by the lapis lazuli electricity. Finally, he seemed willing to hear you out, his eyes gaping as he looked to you for an explanation. He had yet to pull his hand away.

“Listen, there’s a lot I need to tell you and not a lot of time. I have no idea how long this Vide Noir stuff is meant to last and I need your help, ok?” you gently explained, bringing up your other hand to caress his cheek. The sapphire lightning fractured along his cheek and he initially pulled away, but leaned into it after a second, closing his eyes and pressing into it.

“Of course, darling. I’m listening,” he whispered, his eyes now gazing into yours. They were that beautiful shade of amber that you had come to mourn the absence of ever since the band left on tour.

“You’re going to think this is crazy, and believe me I feel crazy,” you sigh, seeing the concerned and disbelieving looks that both Danny and Sammy had been giving you for the past two days when you closed your eyes.

“Go ahead,” Josh gently encouraged, trying to grab your wrist but his hand ghosting through.

“I’m in an alternate dimension. I woke up, and Danny is my roommate and playing for the PGA, Sam runs his own vegetarian restaurant, Jakey is a professional soccer player, and you’re a broadway star dating a woman named Clara.” You hated how your voice cracked upon saying the woman’s name.

“We’re not in the band?”

You shook your head. “Danny said that you guys never got signed by a record label so you never left the garage.”

“Damn. I never even liked theater that much, I just did it because you mentioned how much you loved musicals,” Josh admits, a small laugh lacing his words.

“Wait, you believe me?” Your eyes were beginning to sting, Josh becoming blurry before you.

He attempted to brush the tear that fell down your cheek, feeling the static prickle your skin where his touch was.

“I was under the impression that you had just vanished from your home without a trace. Knowing where you are and that you’re safe is better than anything I could hope for,” he answered, the relief tangible in his eyes. You wanted nothing more than to just surge forward and kiss him, but you knew that it was impossible.

“I’m safe. I’m doing everything I can to get back to you.”

“How are you in front of me? You mentioned something ‘Noir’.”

“It’s a hallucinogenic drug that allows me to astrally project that exists in the dimension I woke up in. Apparently it’s very dangerous and can turn your brain to black sludge if you’re not careful. Sam and Danny hosted their own after school special about it before I took some; they called it the most dangerous and addictive substance known to man,” you explained, your head starting to feel fuzzy and light.

“Why on earth would you risk taking it??” Josh was upset. He didn’t understand.

“Veda told me I could use it to find you. Listen, I don’t think I have a lot of time,” you rush, the fuzziness in your head traveling down to your chest.

“Veda? Lady Moonbeam is there?” Josh knew your mentor and good friend, he knew how mystically gifted she was.

“Yes. Go speak to her in your realm and explain to her that we think someone who is overly infatuated with you might be the cause of my dimension hopping. Ask her to try and track them down, get a name, anything.”

Josh was visibly becoming worried over your increased faintness, his eyes frantically searching your face and his eyebrows knit. “What’s going on?”

“I’ll try and reach you again in a few days. Don’t you dare do anything reckless and dangerous,” you struggle to whisper. You understand how hypocritical that statement was, but there was no point in risking both of your lives in a desperate attempt to return to one another.

“Sunny, wait! Don’t go yet!” Josh’s cries were desperate, his hands coming to grasp onto any part of you he could. He failed each time, his fists only grabbing at empty air.

“Please, remember what I asked you to do. I love you and I’ll see you again soon,” you somehow managed to speak despite it feeling as if you barely had the energy to make your heart beat.

You thought Josh might’ve said something to you, but all you could hear was the high pitched static that rang in your ears whenever there was an absence of sound. Once again, you were suspended in the absence of all things, wondering when you would be relieved from the all consuming loneliness that you had hurdled yourself into.

+++

After what felt like eons of nothing but pure darkness gnawing away at all your senses, you heard the methodical and consistent beep coming from somewhere next to you. You focused everything you had on that noise, slowly feeling the tether your body had on your consciousness pulling it back into place.

The soft patter of footsteps and voices filled your ears next, indercernable but still present. The feeling of stiff and scratchy cloths brushed your skin. You assumed they were linens from the way they laid atop you. Moving seemed like a tremendous and insurmountable undertaking, but you needed to open your eyes, you needed to see what was going on.

Cracking your eyelids open momentarily, you managed to make out a blurry figure perched in a chair next to you. He was incredibly familiar.

“Josh?” you croaked, your throat feeling as if you had only eaten sand for an entire year.

The man looked away from the book he had in his lap. He seemed to only just realize that you were stirring. “Close, but not quite.”

If your brain didn’t feel like it was replaced with a rock, you might’ve been able to identify who it was from that line alone.

“I thought we were past you getting the two of us confused. We don’t even look identical anymore.”

“Jake?” You don’t know why you even asked. There was no one else it could’ve been.

“Bingo,” he confirmed, a tight smile on his lips. It was clear he was trying to hide just how nervous he was about you.

“Where are we? Where are Danny and Sammy?”

Jake sighed, seeming to have expected your barrage of questions. He closed the cover of his book and set it on the nightstand to his left.

“I just sent Daniel and Sam home, you don’t have to worry about them,” he answered, lacing his hands together and leaning against his knees. “As for where you are… You’re in the hospital.”

Despite the fact that you were lying in a hospital bed with IV’s hooked up to your body and the hum of machines were all screaming this fact at you, Jake pointing it out sent an icy shock to your system.

“A hospital? Why?”

His lips pursed. Suddenly it seemed that his hands were the most interesting thing in the world to the younger twin as he gazed down at them, his tongue darting out to lick his lips.

“Jacob, why am I in the hospital?” This time your tone was forceful.

“I should call the boys. I promised I would-”

“Jacob Thomas Kiszka, stop avoiding the question!”

Your voice echoed against the walls of your room, adding to the weight of your demand.

With a sigh, Jake turned his head away from you, his hair falling off his shoulders and hiding his profile from you. “Wait until Sammy and Danny get here. They’ll be able to answer your questions.”

With that, he got up from his seat and slammed the door behind him. You would’ve been angry if you weren’t so taken aback and concerned by Jake’s outburst.

+++

Just as you had finished counting all the ceiling tiles in your room for the twelfth time (there were 16) you heard a knock at your door.

“Yes?” you respond, expecting one of the hospital staff to be checking in on you.

Instead of a person in a lab coat, it was Sammy sheepishly poking his head through the door.

“Hey, Sam.”

“Hi. Can I come in?”

He was acting odd - well, odder than usual. This wasn’t his normal “wade barefoot in a public fountain” weird, rather “I don’t know how to tackle this situation” weird.

“Yeah, go ahead.” You sent him what you hoped was a reassuring smile as you sat up in your bed. You weren’t as sore as you were when you first woke up. “What’s going on?”

Sam took the seat his older brother inhabited before, taking the same position of resting his arms on his knees to lean forward. It was uncanny how similar those Kiszka boys acted sometimes.

“I don’t really know how to tell you this and I feel like sugar-coating it would just be an insult to your intelligence, so I’m just going to come out and say it,” he rambled, refusing to look you in the eyes.

You patiently waited for him to gather his thoughts, only the monotonous beep of your heart monitor filling the gap of noise.

“You remember when I said two days ago that ‘we don’t need someone else hooked on Vide Noir’?” His tone was weary, tired, almost. It was painful for him to talk about this subject.

You nod before you realize that he can’t see you. You were choosing to ignore the “two days ago” part of that question. “Yeah, I do.”

“I was talking about Jake. He was an addict when it first was legalized and only just got sober over a year ago,” the youngest brother explained, finally looking you in the eyes. You wish he hadn’t. They were so full of worry and pain that it made your chest arduously contract. Those down-turned, chestnut eyes were void of the wonder and aloofness they usually harbored, gone with his devil-may-care attitude.

You opened your mouth to speak, but all that came out was a tiny squeak. Your throat was rapidly clenching shut as the gravity of what that information hit you head on. You had screamed at him. You’d screamed at him for not being able to answer a question that was probably incredibly difficult for him to answer. You’d never felt so horrible in your life.

“We tried to get him to stay with his team and play his match, but he refused to listen. ‘I’m the only one who understands what she’s going through’, he kept saying,” Sam continued, a surreptitious crack to his solemn voice as if he was fighting back tears. For what seemed like the first time ever, Sam was completely void of that boyish charm he carried in his aura. It was as if he had aged twenty years before your eyes… It made you sick.

“I… I didn’t know…” It was your turn to refuse his gaze. “I screamed at him…”

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Sam shake his head. “You were the one to stage his intervention.”

“How many times do I have to prove that I’m not the me that you know?”

“I’m starting to believe it more and more,” he admits, getting up from his chair and resting his hand on the door handle.

“I’m gonna go get the other two and then we’ll answer your questions.”

“Sam, I-”

“Just… Jake wouldn’t have told you and you need to know.” He stared at the door, his jaw clenching under his skin.

You waited for him to leave, counting the number of beeps in the silence. But he didn’t.

“Don’t worry about what you did to Jake too much, alright? He’s already forgiven you and understands the emotional turmoil you’ve been going through over the past few days,” Sam sighs, talking to you over his shoulder.

All you do is nod in response. His forgiveness didn’t feel earned and it only made your guilt multiply.

“Besides, he’s a soccer player. He was probably pretending to be more hurt than he actually was out of habit.” A small twinkle of that care free charm was back in Sam’s eyes. It was like a breath of fresh air for you.

You couldn’t help the surprised laugh that burst from your lips. Sam left with a smile on his face, making you feel so much better just from seeing it.

It wasn’t long before he returned with the other two, but it was long enough for your guilt to slither its way back into your system. It didn’t help at all when Jake entered, unable to keep your gaze for longer than a fraction of a second.

Jake took his spot in the chair again, Danny sat on the edge of your bed, and Sam stood sentry to Danny’s left at the foot of the bed. They all looked a little disheveled, all three wearing their hair up in buns; something they did when they didn’t want to deal with it.

“Hey, we’re glad you’re awake,” Danny softly greeted, sliding his hand atop yours.

“Yeah, you really scared us,” Sam added, a poor attempt of his usual smile pulled tightly across his lips.

“I’m fine, guys,” you noted, taking Danny’s hand properly in yours.

“About that…”

“What?” you asked Daniel, his head bowed as he scratched the back of his neck.

“Well, while you were…”

“Unconscious,” Sam supplied.

“Thanks, Sam. While you were unconscious, we ordered a CT scan for you.”

Damn these boys and their love of dramatic effect.

“And?” you prompted.

“Completely normal. As far as the doctors are concerned, there’s nothing wrong with you that would cause you to believe that you woke up in a different dimension,” Danny explained, clearly beginning to finally believe your story.

“Nothing wrong besides the fact that you thought it was a good idea to take Vide Noir,” Jake argued, his arms crossing over his chest.

All you could do was sigh. There really wasn’t anything you could say to refute that as it was a really stupid idea.

“It was a stupid idea, I know. I don’t expect any of you to understand, though.”

It was evident that Jake wanted to chew you out, but he was biting his tongue. His fingers were drumming anxiously on his arm, his foot shaking to the tempo of a song only he could hear. You wondered if he still played guitar. If he didn’t, that seemed like an immense tragedy to let all that talent and passion go to waste. He was always in his element when he played, it was clear to anyone who watched him play.

“So, you never explained why I’m in the hospital,” you prompt, hoping to get the answers you wanted.

“You overdosed. They had to Cosmic Ash you to try and retrieve your consciousness and save your life,” Jake bluntly and clinically responded, like he was trying to be as helpful yet detached as possible.

The hand that you were holding Danny’s with clenched, a stab of fear making your blood go cold as you realized just how dangerous this drug was. Danny glanced down at your hand before soothingly running his thumb across your knuckles.

“Cosmic Ash?” You swallowed down your fear in an attempt to remain focused on gaining as much knowledge as possible.

“It’s this gray powder that you diffuse in order to inhale and reverse the effects of Vide Noir. It’s made from the cremated remains of a living stars’ rays or so they claim; don’t ask how because no one knows, really,” Jake answered, rolling his eyes in annoyance at whoever “they” were.

“That tube under your nose isn’t just giving you oxygen,” Sam cut in, tipping his head to the side in order to look at you as his boyfriend was blocking his view of you.

“I’ve been breathing in cremated stars this whole time?” Your free hand went to touch the clear tube under your nose.

“Not since you woke up. As useful as Cosmic Ash is at being an anti-drug to Vide Noir, it’s just as addictive. A lot of Void- I mean, a lot of people who were addicted to Vide Noir get hooked on Cosmic Ash,” Sam informed, his eyes darting to Jake as he spoke.

All it took was one look over at the younger twin to understand. Jake was either struggling with a Cosmic Ash addiction or in the process of getting past it.

“While I appreciate the effort, Samuel, you don’t have to try so hard. You can say ‘Void Chaser’, it’s not like I haven’t heard spat at me before,” Jake tiredly sighed, his head tipping back to look at his little brother.

You shot Danny a confused look, hoping for an explanation.

“‘Void Chaser’ is a derogatory term used against Vide Noir junkies. It’s like how you’d call a heroin addict ‘pin-eyed’ or a crack addict a ‘speed freak’.” He was using that detached tone again, but you could tell by the way that Jake could not sit still that this was hard for him to talk about.

It was silent after that. There was a tenseness in the air that was about to snap like a rubber band if someone made a sudden move.

“You used to know all this. You can’t blame it on the Vide Noir, either, because it’s actually been known to improve memory. What happened to you?” While it wasn’t said in an offended tone, you got the impression that Jake was offended over you forgetting all this information about things that didn’t exist to you days prior.

If Sam was to be believed, you allegedly were the one that caused Jake to get clean. You can only imagine what it must feel like to have the person who cared for you and showed you kindness in your darkest hour not only seem to become completely ignorant about your plight, but to undergo the same process that nearly cost you your own life. Jake must be feeling so betrayed by you, but he clearly cared for you considering he dropped everything to be by your side in order to prevent you from the same fate he suffered only a year ago.

“I’m gonna assume that Danny and Sam already filled you in on my ‘crazy story’ about how I’m not in the correct universe - which I’m not - and that you don’t believe it.”

Jake just shrugged his shoulders. He didn’t want to outright admit that he thought it was bullshit. “They mentioned that you believed that Greta Van Fleet actually became successful and not just a pipe dream of mine that never left the garage.”

“Yes, it’s true. In fact, I believe that could be a reality in this dimension if you gave it another shot,” you pressed, determined to prove both that you were telling the truth and that their band should exist in every reality.

Jake scoffed. It seemed he was the most bitter about the failure of the band; it was his dream, after all.

“Do you still play?” you asked all three boys.

“Of course I still play,” Jake responded.

“You saw my drum kit in our garage,” Danny answered.

“I couldn’t abandon my little lady like that,” Sammy admitted.

“And Josh sings for a living,” you tactically add.

It was silent for a moment before Jake changed the subject.

“Why did you take Vide Noir?”

“They didn’t tell you?” You glance over at the couple near your bed.

“I want to hear your explanation,” Jake clarified, tucking a stray piece of hair behind his ear.

Well, damn. If that didn’t make you feel like a scorned toddler being forced to tell one parent your wrong doings under duress of the other, you didn’t know what did.

“Veda told me that it’s something people use to astrally project, so I did it in order to find Josh.”

“Try using a phone next time. Also, it almost never works that way. Few people have ever been able to get it to work that way,” the younger twin debunked, his leg coming to rest on his thigh.

“No, not this Josh. My Joshua. The one I’ve been dating since high school, the one who holds me like I’m the most precious thing in the known universe,” you frustratedly clarified.

You heard Sam heave a sigh from your left, clearly tired of you spouting the same things over and over.

“I saw him, by the way.”

“Impossible, he’s at JFK airport right now,” Danny deemed, his thumb halting against your knuckles.

You let out a frustrated growl, your head tipping back to look at the ceiling. How many times were you going to have to explain?

“My Josh. I saw him while I was on Vide Noir. I talked to him and everything; I think he was sleeping and that’s how I was able to contact him. He was standing on the shore of Lake Huron and when I tried to touch him, his fingers ghosted right through my hand and there were blue sparks that webbed out from his touch within my hand.”

Jake snapped his head in your direction, his attention fully captured by you. “What did you just say?”

“It looked like blue electricity was shooting throughout my transparent skin wherever Josh touched it,” you repeat.

“That just sounds like a regular drug trip, or something,” Sam chimed, his brow knit.

“That’s nothing like what being on Vide Noir is, Sam,” Jake bluntly dismissed, his almost frantic eyes darting towards his little brother briefly.

Sam wore a gobsmacked expression on his face. Jake was hardly ever this intolerant of his kid brother. Danny reached out and patted his boyfriend on the shoulder in an act of sympathy.

“When you talked to your Josh, was he cognizant? Like, was he responding to you intelligently?” Jake questioned, leaning forward in his chair again to be closer to you.

“Yeah, he acted just like my Joshie does.”

“And when he touched you, did it feel like static was flowing through your body?”

You nodded your head. “It was similar to that pins and needles feeling you get when your foot goes numb, but it wasn’t unpleasant.”

Jake was silent as he leaned back in his chair, hand pressed against his mouth as he gazed off in the distance. You noticed him fiddling with a circular object in his other hand which you thought was a coin, but it wasn’t. It took you a moment, but you realized it was his sobriety chip.

“My god… you are telling the truth,” he finally decided, his stare still off in the distance gazing at something only he could see.

After he spoke, his eyes locked onto yours.

“What happened to you?"

+++

Taglist: @shutupdevvie @trplshotofdopamine @maykiszka

@m1rkw00dpr1ncess @allieboop @theleft0ver @stardustingold @hayley1623 @drjm-slay @joshkiszkas @gretavanfleas @eeeloraaa @alwayssotiredbutneverofyou @sarakay-gvf @gretavanfle3t @doodle417 @sammykiszkasunusedshoes @jmks-housewife @ageoferin @etoilesnoor

Link to be added to the taglist

#greta van fleet #greta van fic #i hear the river say your name #josh kiszka x reader #josh kiszka x y/n #angst #sam kiszka #danny wagner #jake kiszka #josh kiszka #sanny gvf

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ilove-cedricdiggory · 3 years

Text

Moony

Remus x Reader

Part 2

Summary - After you left Remus after telling him about your pregnancy, you're now trying to juggle being pregnant by yourself in a foreign country, along with your three best friends searching for you.

Trigger Warning - Cursing, mentions of abortion, angst, it's longish? I think that's all. Let me know if there's more though.

Italics are letters, Bold is unknown to the readers.

America.

That's the only way you can really describe it. It is, well, America. Some places are incredibly beautiful, some terribly ugly. Some incredibly cold, some unbearably hot. Some busier than Diagon Alley on the day all the kids come to buy their things, some slower than a virgin's bedroom.

You hadn't seen much, especially seeing as how you had only been there for a week, but it was already more than you expected. You expected a stern talking to, you expected a bed rest, you expected a midwife in every thirty minutes, and you definitely expected to have someone at your side every second of the day. But, that wasn't what you got.

Especially seeing as how, your Great Grandpa kicked the rest of your family out of the house before you arrived, not wanting his favorite grandkid to be in an uncomfortable home, especially while she was growing his two great, great grandkids.

He was incredibly wealthy, a pure blood from England gone American. You had been the only one that actively spoke to him and visited him as often as you could while he lived in England. Now, your family was watching the sand fall in his hourglass to see who got the most money from his will. Honestly, though, you could see the man living another 200 years - just to spite them all.

He had taken you out, shown you incredible things, although you were stuck in a stupid state of unbearable heat - Texas. Although, the heat had taken you out of the sweaters that had you crying every time you got a whiff of his scent, and into some beautiful maternity sun dresses. You had already sent 20 pictures to Molly.

You had yet to write to Lily though, but her owls came twice a day, at least. You were starting to worry that she would get on James' broom and follow the owl herself to find you. Her letters really all stayed the same.

Y/n, just tell me where you are. I won't tell Remus, or Sirius. Heck, I won't even tell James. Harry and I will come visit and I'll tell you all about how I beat Remus' arse. Or how James did....Or how Sirius did. But, please, just write me back. I love you. I miss you incredibly.

Then you had

Y/n, come on, you really have me worried. The entire order has heard about what happened and I think they're all freaking out each second like we are. We miss you. You're the ray of Hufflepuff joy we all need, the always Ravenclaw intelligence the boys really need, the absolute Gryffindor bravery in the craziest of situations that the order needs, and the Slytherin strength I need. Please, just write back.

Then, she got help from the boys - or, the ones you would be open to hear from.

Y/n, while I have to be honest, Lily is standing over my shoulder watching me write this, I was going to do it either way. Remus was an absolute arse, I understand that, but we miss you. Lily, Harry and I want nothing more than for you to be home, with us even. You don't have to see him, you really don't. We just want to be here for you through this time, the good and the bad. Please write back.

When that didn't work, you had a howler from Sirius.

Y/n Y/l/n, I swear, if you don't write me back, I'm gonna jump into the paper and send myself! I'm going absolutely crazy watching Lily freak out every day! You're the only one that can calm her, not even James is doing it! You're taking away my precious James time! I fucking miss you - okay? Moony is an absolute dick. He deserved you walking out on him, he really did, but please don't walk out on all of us too. Y/n, we miss you, we really do. Moony isn't even here anymore, he left after we all went to Molly's - Sirius, don't tell her that! - Shit, fuck, how do I scratch that? Uhhh, I didn't say that. Erase! Erase! Lily, how do I erase on a howler? Fuck. Whatever. I'm sure it erased. But, come home. I'll make James make you that surprisingly good chicken he makes and I'm sure Lily would love to give you some old baby momma clothes or whatever the fuck they're called. I just - we just - no, I miss you, okay? Come home.

Your heart broke, not just because Remus was missing, but because your friends were hurt.

You sat down at the table in your guest house, sighing softly. A quill and some parchment sat before you, your hand shaking as you dipped it into the ink.

Lily, James, and Sirius.

While I know I could write a letter to each of you separately, I'm almost positive you're all together, or you're gonna call each other as soon as you get my letter.

I'm okay, I think. Not as okay as I wish I was, I cry a lot. While I wish I could blame it on the hormones, I know it's not. Everything reminds me of him, even here. No, I'm not in England, I'm in the states. I'm staying with some family and I think it's doing me well. At least, I've started to own my pregnancy.

After what Remus said to me, my body broke. I just about hated the fact that I was pregnant. Not my kids, just that I was pregnant. But, with each day, I realize that this pregnancy is the thing I needed most. While I wish I didn't have to say this - it showed me the man Remus is. Does that mean I cry any less? Of course not - you guys know me.

But, I really don't think I can come home, at least not yet. I'm still trying to figure out what I'm to do. I love Remus with every fiber of my being, but how do you love a man that told you to get rid of your own children, the minute he gets home from a mission he could have died from? How do you let him hold you as he feels the two children you both created grow in your belly knowing he hates them?

I'm going to come home eventually, of course I am. And I already promised Molly I'll be back for a visit soon, and you guys are more than welcome to come visit once I teach my family how to properly floo in America - did you know they don't do that here? It's super weird. But, I love you three incredibly. I'm so sorry this has happened. Be safe.

Your heart broke as you debated on writing more, about what your heart was still set on. Remus. Where was he? Where did he go? Had they heard from him? Was he looking for you? But you couldn't bring yourself to ask them.

The owl was sent with their letter, leaving you in the silence once more.

How could you feel so absolutely alone when you had people wanting nothing more than to be with you? Is it what you thought you deserved? They were his friends before they were yours. You felt horrible that they were taking your side. You felt your heart ripping slowly with each beat it made in it's spot in your being. It was like one half of your heart was tied to Remus' and with each beat away from him, it tore you apart - slowly, filling you with excruciating pain.

Five minutes after the letter was sent, you were standing, trying to find a way to busy your mind.

Ten minutes after the letter was sent, you were crouching in the corner, the weight of your predicament pressing down on you so hard, it's like it formed hands and was set on pushing you six feet under without any hole dug for your body.

Twenty minutes after the letter was sent, your body was shaking with it's sobs once more, the loss of not only your spouse, but also the friends you loved almost as much as him.

An hour later, you had fallen asleep on the floor, your mind groggy and your heart tearing with each beat, your conscious hoping to pull you away from the pain your felt in the body that was supposed to be yours - but belonged to the man who seemed to not want you anymore.

It was dark, so incredibly dark. The only thing that was seen was the moon, halfway full in it's wake. The only thing heard was the pads of feet stomping on the ground as they ran. Ran where? Ran why? You could feel the pain in your chest, but it was like it wasn't your own. As you came to a stop, you looked at a building that seemed a familiar kind of unfamiliar - although that didn't really make much sense to you.

Before you realized it, you were slumped over the toilet, letting out the contents of your stomach. One of your hands pulled your hair to one side of your shoulder, keeping it there. But all you could think was how badly you wish it was Remus holding your hair, rubbing your back as he whispered sweet nothings in your ear.

But all that mattered today was to get through it, like any other day.

One day following the motions.

Two days following the motions.

Three, four, five days.

Until your hands were pulled from your face, the skin around your fingers almost chewed to nothing, the warm face of Lily standing before you.

"If I see you bite your fingers one more time, I'm going to hex them to taste like Harry's dirty diapers." She spoke, pulling you up from your spot on the couch.

"Lily - I." You stopped, looking around her to see James, Sirius, and Harry. "How?" You asked, looking back into the eyes of your best friend.

"Your great grandpa is super cool. I think he was getting tired of all the letters we were sending him too and gave us the floo network here to knock you out of whatever it is you're in." Sirius spoke, Harry on his shoulders, pulling at his hair.

"You guys-" You were cut off with Lily pulling you into her hold, her larger belly pressed against yours as you both attempted to properly hug one another.

"I have missed you, so much" Her voice was soft, uncommon for Lily. Her hands held you tightly, almost like she was holding onto you to make sure you didn't disappear once more.

"Come on Lils, other people missed her too." Sirius spoke to cause her to pull away and glare at the man. "If you weren't holding onto my kid, I'd have hexed you so hard for that." She said, moving to grab Harry from his shoulders as James wrapped you up in a hug himself.

"If we hadn't seen you for another day, I think Lily was going to fly off on my broom." He said, causing you to laugh at your own prediction.

You finally got to Sirius, his arms holding you tighter than the two. "I'm sorry." He mumbled, his hold growing tighter. "What are you sorry for, Siri?" You asked him, pulling away to look into his face.

"What he said, what he did. That's not what you deserved." He mumbled, pushing your hair back a bit. "I swear, I about pounded his face in at Molly's. I think Arthur had to separate me magically." He trailed off, looking at the floor.

His words brought tears to your eyes once more, your heart feeling empty, yet full. "That's not your fault, Sirius. We all knew he didn't want kids, but we weren't careful. I don't know why his reaction surprised me." You were honest with them, having thought this entire thing was truly your fault.

The three of them surrounded you, their eyes narrow with intent. "Y/n, the last thing this is, is your fault. You're his fiancée, not a random person. Either way, those are his kids. He shouldn't have treated you like he did." James spoke with meaning, wanting you to understand each word he spoke.

Somehow, the four of you relaxed enough to find yourself growing to bed. You showed Sirius his room, a place where James and Lily can lay Harry, and then their own room, before finding your way to your own.

You laid in bed, wide awake. You knew what tonight was, the night before the full moon, and knew that Remus was probably out wherever he was, already in pain. Every turn was different, it truly was, but each night before the full moon, his body ached, his bones almost softened, knowing they would be breaking and turning in 24 hours, and his head psyched him out, especially when you weren't there. This was now the third full moon your financé was to handle without you.

You refused to cry, knowing Lily always had a third sense to that stuff, and willed yourself to sleep. But, you laid there.

And laid there.

And laid there some more, until you couldn't handle the quiet, and found yourself moving out of the room and towards Sirius'.

You had slept with Sirius before, each time when Remus was gone and your heart could hardly handle it. Now, the three hearts inside of you couldn't stand the guilt of not being with him.

The door didn't creak when you opened it, none of the floor boards made a sound, but that somehow made it worse. Your feet carried you to the dark haired man, seeing his sleeping frame move, sensing another person there.

His eyes jerked open, coming to look at you as he smiled sadly. "How did I know you'd come in here. Just can't resist the charm, can you?" His voice was deeper, rougher from sleep. It calmed you, but never like Remus' did. You waddled closer to the man, his arms opening for you as you crawled into him.

You both laid in silence, but awake now, as you took in the moment.

"I miss him, Siri. I know I shouldn't, I know I should hate him, but my entire being misses him." Your voice was softer than his was, much softer, but it wasn't because you were afraid of him, but because you were afraid of your own truth.

"I know you do. I know he misses you too. You guys are kinda like Lily and James, meant to be. He's just, an absolute git for this." His fingers worked in your hair, rubbing your scalp and causing your eyes to close in comfort.

"I thought we were meant to be too. But, he doesn't want me anymore. He doesn't want us." At that, Sirius rested a hand at your bump, this being the first touch they really had beside your own. "He does, he's just stupid and scared. Either way, you have us. Aunt Lily, Uncle James, and, the absolute best uncle in the world, Uncle Siri. We've got you." His sensere words lulled you to sleep, a sleep where you felt safe and happy falling into.

You were running again, but it didn't feel like you were in danger. It felt like you were running to run, really. Which, was something you did not do. You weren't in the woods, but you didn't know where you were. All you did know is that you were still scared. Absolutely, bone crushingly scared.

With each step you took, the fear grew. How could you possibly be this scared? You were looking for something, but you didn't know what. You were shaking, but from both the cold and the fear. You were shaking. Shaking. Shaking

Shaking. "Y/n, wake up!" Sirius was looking down at you, his eyes full of excitement. "Your great grandpa is showing us the American version of Diagon Alley today!" You smiled up at him, nodding.

"Okay, okay, let me get changed."

The four of you had left your Grandpa once he settled himself down to play some wizards chess, waving you off.

"You know where the house is when you're done, I've got a title to keep."

You wandered through stores, showing them the few things you had learned so far about the wizarding world here. The four of you had just walked into their version of Flourish and Blotts when you were stopped by an older couple. "Oh, you both look absolutely wonderful! I remember when I was that pregnant. How far are you both?" she was smiling at you and Lily, growing closer to you.

"I'm due in about a week and a half. We already have one, Harry, who's staying with her family." She had pointed to you, smiling at the older woman. "Oh, I'd expect you to be due any day now. Seconds always come early and you look family dropped. What about you dear?" She had looked to you, glancing at your own belly.

"Oh, I'm only a few months along. Twins." You laughed, your hand resting protectively on your belly. "Awe, that's lovely. You both look radiant. Two amazing father's, I hope?" She now looked at James and Sirius, smiling at them. "Oh, no, I'm not the father. Our best mate is." Sirius spoke, gesturing to you. "Well, I dunno, is he?" He asked, looking at the three of you. "It's complicated." Lily said, smiling.

The older woman nodded, smiling. "I completely understand. I wish you both the best of luck." She bid you all adu, leaving with her husband.

"I can't tell if that was awkward or sweet." James laughed, leading you all to the door to leave.

You all laughed as you walked through the Wizarding space until you and Lily began complaining about the swollen ankles and bloated stomach enough to convince James and Sirius to guide you both home.

As the day turned into night, you now showing your friends the muggle artifacts your grandpa has collected from his move to the states. That was, until Lily groaned in pain.

"Fuck, she was right." The young woman grumbled, clenching her bump. "What do you mean?" James asked, his hand on her back softly. "He's coming early, James. I'm in labor, fuck." She groaned again, tilting her head back at the pain she was feeling for the second time in her life.

"Shit, Sirius, go find some towels. I'll go tell grandpa to write the healer for labor." You spoke, pointing Sirius in the direction of the towels before moving to Lily. "It'll be okay, okay? Everything will be fine." She nodded, gripping your hand tightly as she looked in your eyes. She smiled before groaning once more, a contraction hitting her. "Okay, okay, healer. You guys lay her down." Sirius returned with multiple towels, James and him laying a few out before helping Lily lay down on them.

You turned to waddle out of your home, attempting to get to your grandpa's house as quickly as possible.

Three steps towards his house, you heard a twig snap.

Five steps towards his house, you heard a thud.

Nine steps towards his house, a figure stopped before you, it's frame furry and bent, a growl releasing from his lips.

A werewolf.

How the fuck is a werewolf standing in front of you, in the middle of fucking Texas, in a populated muggle area?

You took a few steps backwards, until it clicked.

The only Werewolf that would spend his full moon looking for you was the same werewolf that has plagued your mind for the past month.

Moony.

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hotdamnhunnam · 3 years

Text

Filthy Fucking Pet

A/N: Here’s the next requested fic from my Dirty Little Secret – Super Kinky List! In which Jax Teller owns and abuses you like an actual animal… this shit is mad intense lol and Jax is an absolute alpha male asshole. **Please note the warnings: This fic is all about the kinks, please do not read if this is not your thing!!**

Pairing: Jax Teller x F!Reader Warnings: smut, swearing, dom!Jax, extreme degradation/dehumanization (master/pet kink, sweat kink, foot worship, ass worship, Jax humiliates you to the max, realistically this is not at all a healthy relationship) Request: This Dirty Little Secret request (anon)

Word Count: ~2.6k

**Please note warnings above**

Triggering content after ‘Keep reading’ cut…

Seriously, this shit is super savage and sick and twisted. You’re basically Jax Teller’s personal house pet. In addition to kinky stuff like rimming and the general vibe of extreme submission, this is also the first fic I’ve posted on tumblr that features foot worshiping (I swear I have no interest in feet irl really – as with pretty much all of the kinks in my kinkiest fics honestly, it’s just a theoretical fantasy that I have only for Charlie, and only in theory… since theoretically I have no limits with my sex god king…)

Anywhore, enough ado about nothing! 🙃 All of the kinks in this fic are mentioned in the above warnings, so please just be mindful of them before you jump in…

***************

You used to be human. But now... it feels as if you've never been.

From the day you and Jackson first met, way back when, you had fallen in love with the crown prince. Fallen to your knees to serve him as his bitch and that's all you have been ever since. Pleasing him is your business. You're his little whore, and his personal pet: nothing more, nothing less.

Anything but human honestly. You're whatever Jax Teller wants you to be. His kinky sex kitten, his filthy fuckpig, or his damn dirty dog on a leash. It's the best. You don't speak, you don't eat—not human food, at least—you just serve at his feet. This is your whole existence. And God, you feel so fucking blessed.

You spend all your days in his house, day in and day out. The castle of the king of Charming. It's such a gift just to live under the same roof as him. Whenever he's not home, you miss him so badly it hurts. But you keep yourself busy by doing the housework. Constantly crawling on all fours, you use your grubby paws to scrub the floor, and sweep the dust off of his furniture.

Then once you're done with all your chores, you kneel down by the front door, and wait desperately for your master. Just counting the seconds until he returns.

Every time that it happens, the moment you hear the smooth roar of the engine as his bike gets in... then his powerful footsteps approaching the entrance... your heart starts to beat harder, faster. On fire in the presence of Jax. There is always a butt plug stuck deep in your ass, with a big fluffy fake tail attached. You're otherwise naked except for your collar and tags.

And today, as your master comes home after quite a long time far away, you are happier than you can take—your whole body quivers and quakes, and your tail starts to wag.

When Jax finally walks in, you gaze up at him with wide, worshipful eyes. He's so damn beautiful you could cry. You yelp and whimper a few times in greeting, to express how excited you are to be seeing your king. By now your human brain has certainly stopped working. Your hungry tongue hangs from your open mouth, breathing needy and loud, as subhuman growls and thick gobs of drool keep spilling out.

He smiles down at you as he enters, worn out from a long day of being Jax Teller, the baddest motherfucker ever. He must be exhausted, no doubt.

But still his gorgeous grin is big and genuine, bright as the sun, his slicked hair such a brilliant blonde, eyes as deep and as blue as the ocean. Clearly pleased at the sight of your tail-wagging motion, a signal of your pure devotion.

"Happy to see me?" he teases playfully, as if he has to ask. Typical Jax.

You nod gleefully in response to that. Your perfect master reaches down to pat your head, stroking your hair now as you purr for him, showing how much you adore him, as his faithful little pet.

"That's a good slut," he coos. "Go on, you know what to do."

Lowering your face to the ground, as ever eager to go down, upon those words he speaks, you hurry to remove his shoes. Those famously white sneaks. Then tug his socks off with your teeth—damp with a long day's worth of sweat, getting you drunk on his intoxicating scent, the pure essence of Jackson—then press sloppy kisses all over his beautiful feet. Servicing him like this is everything you need.

Ugh, you've missed him so much... full of love and submission, arousal dripping from your crotch, you stuff his socks into your mouth both at once, then lift your face off of the floor and sit back on your heels in your usual kneeling position. Your paws are propped under your chin as you blink up at him. He knows just what you want.

"Look at you, cunt. You wanna play fetch?" he says, chuckling as you bob your dumb head eagerly up and down. It's so much fun when he rolls his sweaty socks into a ball and throws it all over the house, for you to chase around. Playing that game is such a privilege. "Hmm, I would... but I'm not in the mood. Master's too fucking tired. Too bad for you, bitch."

Aw. Too bad indeed. Wallowing in self-pity, you pout and hang your head in a deep bow, but you know better than to plead. He turns to walk away now, and you follow at his feet. Crawling as you are it's always hard to keep up with his speed.

He's yawning by the time you reach the master bedroom. Some nights he has more energy when he gets home. Sometimes he'd slam you up against the wall and fuck you hard in every hole, wild and savage as an animal, filling you with his thick creamy cum, so deliciously full...

Apparently not tonight, though. You can't blame him, you know. You can't blame Jackson Teller for any damn thing, to be honest. Of course not. Because he is your fucking king. Whatever he does, he's your master, your god; everything about his whole existence is flawless.

You watch in rapture as he strips naked, carelessly flinging his kutte and the rest of his clothes to the floor, and flops facedown in bed to lay his weary head to rest. Fit for the king he is, his bed is big and plush and luxurious. At this late hour, he's too tired to even bother with a shower, you notice. Fuck yes—that's how you like it best.

Hopefully he'll let you use your tongue to clean up all his glorious sweat. Then whenever he leaves next to take care of business, you'll still get to savor his scent in his absence, inhaling it off of the sheets and the mattress. Your thirsty mouth is watering just at the thought of it, as you scurry all over the bedroom to clean up his mess.

Gathering up all the clothes that he scattered, you can't help but take a deep breath. Inhaling the essence of this sinfully sexy bastard.

You indulge in a whiff, as you slobber and sniff—focusing on the pits of his shirt so damp and sweaty it's obscene, and the rich-smelling crotch of his jeans, soaking up all the musk of his cock and his balls and his ass which smells so good it hurts—and especially his underwear... before dutifully dropping them into the hamper, along with the socks that you brought from downstairs. Though you hate washing Jax's sweet scent off of anything, one of your chores, of course, is to take care of all the laundry for your master.

"Get over here, bitch. You should clean up after me faster," he scolds, dominant voice husky and low, somewhat muffled as his head is partially sunken into one of his deluxe pillows. "Did you just get distracted by sniffing my sweat? You're such a greedy, filthy fucking pet."

You instantly start whimpering in apology, overflowing with self-hatred as you hasten toward the foot of his bed. You would say sorry, in so many words, if you could, as you should.

But you can't, given that you're not human. And your master knows that of course. All you want is to worship his body, and show him you're sorry, but you need permission before you can move from your place on the floor...

"Crawl up onto the bed," he commands, well assured you will follow his orders as fast as you can. "Go ahead, you pathetic whore. Make yourself useful and worship my back. Can't you see I'm exhausted and need to relax?"

Oh, how you love when he lets out his inner beast and treats you to the absolute most savage side of Jax.

Though you also love when he is soft, when he treats you with sweet talk and cuddles you up... this is the side of him you adore even more. His abuse is just what you live for.

"I want a full body massage," he orders, as you set to work on his muscular shoulders. "Yeah, use those paws. And that dirty mouth of yours... so dirty... mmm, that's it, lick all the sweat off my body. Desperate fucking dog."

You don't need him to tell you—that is exactly what you're dying to do—but it's so much better when he does. So damn hot. It's insane just how much you get off on his dirty talk.

And he keeps going on as you worship his perfect physique. While your hands rub and knead every inch, your mouth traces a line down the smooth divine curve of his spine, running down the black ink of the reaper design, wet lips puckering into passionate kisses all over his dewy skin, slurping up each new bead of fresh sweat as it dribbles and leaks. Every so often, his degrading words and his delicious groans of pleasure cut to cruel sadistic laughter, whenever he wants to humiliate you for being such a freak.

That just makes you love him even more. You're his subhuman whore, reduced into a literal pig as the maddening scent and flavor of your master makes you fucking squirm, wriggling like a worm, every sound out of your throat a squeal or a squeak. His savage strength makes you so weak...

"Unghh God, you're such a fucking animal," he snarls as you salivate all over his sculpted muscles. "Get that worthless face lower down where you belong. Yeah, you know what you want. Suffocate in my asshole."

And that very instant, you do just as told. You wedge your whole damn head into the sacred space between his sweaty cheeks, diving in deep, digging for gold. It's salty and sweet and so so fucking hot. You don't even care whether you'll ever come up for air or not. He's everything you need and all you want to breathe. Your king Jax Teller is a motherfucking god...

When he growls and reaches back with both of his strong hands to push his palms against your skull and smash your face even deeper inside his crack, the pure aggression of the act gives you a goddamn heart attack.

Before you can even recover from that, he suddenly shifts—you gasp for a split second as his magnificent body lifts.

But the next thing you know, he is squatting low over your mouth, then sitting the fuck down till your tongue is lodged deep in his tight sweaty hole and his big heavy balls are completely smothering your snout.

Jax throws his head back with a guttural groan as he starts to grind, taking your mouth for a ride. You could die just from that fucking sound, from the taste, from the feel of his full body weight as he shudders and sighs, dominating your face. Degrading you just right. You could do this all night. Then he looks back down, bright blue gaze locking with your eyes, open wide, sex-crazed and lost in a mad loving daze.

Is this fucking real? Even as it happens, you honestly can't fathom how good it feels...

And there's no way that you wouldn't notice, in this position of pure bliss, your master's fucking enormous cock. While you drown in his ass, savoring your sweet feast, that massive piece of meat is throbbing right above you like a beast, hard as a rock.

"Fuuuck, that's it—eat my ass, you good-for-nothing pig..." Jax explosively grunts as his hot sphincter squeezes and strangles your tongue. "Look what you're doing to my dick. You're gonna make me fucking cum. That what you want?"

Ohhh Godddd...

He goes on before you can respond. "Well, that's just what you're gonna get. Ughh—such a good little pet..." he praises as he begins pumping himself, the pink tip of his dick giving off the rich scent of his juices, each sweet drop that glistens, all glossy and wet. Some of his precum drips to your forehead.

But that's not where his full load is going to land. No, that's all gonna go down your dirty whore throat. Jax then clutches the top of your head with one hand, fingers rooting hard into your scalp, making you gulp and gasp, as you suck on his ass, while his other fist jacks off his perfect dick, faster and harder with each fucking stroke. He's so hot it's a joke.

"Shit—gonna cum—take it, bitch... take it all till you choke..." he moans, pulling his ass swiftly off of your slobbering lips and then pressing the tip of his cock onto your twitching tongue. Blessing you with a huge load of sweet white hot cum. By this point you're struck dumb.

You can feel your eyes roll to the back of your skull, as you savor his flavor and swallow him whole. You are so goddamn grateful. Jackson Teller is feeding your body, your heart and your soul.

You're reminded right now of what you've always known: that you are his to own. He is more than human, so much more, all that you live for... and you are so much less and always have been. Falling in these roles just feels so fucking natural. He is a fucking god—everything you are not—and you're a fucking animal.

Once he is done using you as his subhuman cum dump, your master is gracious enough to let you clean him up. You wrap your lips around his flawless cock to lick and suck off every drop. Pressing French kisses all across his freshly drained balls and his perfect pink asshole. Hoping that your beloved master knows he's your entire world.

"Good girl," Jax sighs, as your face nestles in the space between his strong powerful thighs. "Bet you wish you could sleep with me here in this bed. But that would be wrong. Don't you know where you belong, you filthy little pet?"

Ah, yes—you could never forget. With a whimper of submissive bliss, you give your master one last kiss, right on the tip of his delicious dick. Admiring how even right after he came it’s still so stiff and throbbing and thick.

And then you climb off of his mattress and crawl into your tiny pet bed, set right by his nightstand. The spot where you're so blessed to sleep beside this divine god of a man. You curl yourself up nice and small, into a little ball, so you can fit. And all the while you're still squealing like a pig. You just can't help it.

The king of Charming huffs out one of his majestic snickers at the sound of you grunting and groveling, so low-down and pathetic. "Goodnight, pig."

Your heart flutters—so grateful and glad that he calls you that, just what you are to him, always will be... so fucking filthy... you know that he is pleased, and his pleasure is all that matters.

You already can't wait till the morning when he'll let you drink from his dick, hopefully. But till then you'll just sleep, knowing that all your dreams will be sweet, for you dream of one thing only: pleasing your master.

And you're living that dream, as unreal as it seems. Your real life is as good as it gets.

You'll go on forever loving every minute of living with Jax Teller—living for Jax Teller, now and forever—as his filthy fucking pet.

***************

… Sooo I know that was SUPER kinky shit, but I hope there are some filthy bitches who enjoyed it, and would love to hear if you did!! 😅❤️

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xo-cuteplosion-xo · 3 years

Note

i am so sorry if you don’t do requests like these (i couldn’t find the rules for req on your navigation but i might be blind) the following i’m about to request might be triggering so please ignore my req if you need to (tw: mentions of sexual abuse) can you do a dazai x reader comfort where the reader has been sexually abused as a kid and although it’s been a long time the trauma still lingers? regardless of whether you do it or not ILY - random anon who simps for dazai

I actually don’t have rules made (i should probably do that...). Personally I have very little I won’t write.

Whispers of comfort | Dazai comfort x reader |

Warnings: mentions of past sexual abuse

(wasn’t sure if you wanted a scenario or hc so I went with a scenario. I hope you enjoy it.)

Beneath every smile, there’s a tear. Behind every cloud there is light. Even under the dark cloud of the night snuggled up besides Dazai, thoughts haunted the mind. The blankets were neatly tucked around for warmth in the cold atmosphere. Despite how comfortable your body was, the everlasting cold of memories refused to leave you. Of course, you knew you were safe in his arms. Yet, it still haunted your mind. You’d been a child then, you were not them anymore. You were not there, it would never happen again.

Attempting to fall back asleep, you let your eyes drift shut. Immediately you shivered under the images. Darting your eyes open, you sat up hoping not to wake your loving boyfriend. Running your hands over your skin you shuttered. The unwanted touches still felt like they lingered no matter how many years passed, and how many times you tried to rub yourself clean. Your eyes had started watering in your frustration, it went unnoticed by you.

As arms wrapped tenderly around your waist, your body acted on its own, flinching with a soft fear. Moving from the soft grip to provide safety. “Darling?” dazai’s voice made its way through the frigid air. A slight hurt mixed with sprinkles of confusion wrapping around the name he called you. Turning your head to look at him you went to apologize before he shook his head, reaching his hand out to you. “What’s wrong?” he asked, cupping your cheek. Once more you tugged away not wanting the touches. Even if they were from him, your current state wouldn’t let you feel the difference, the warmth of his hands felt cold against your cheek.

“It's nothing. I just need a moment.” Once again your hands rubbed your wrists and your arms. He thanked the intelligence that made him feel separated from humanity. Carefully he gave you space, connecting the dots. He lacked skills in comfort, but he knew he had to at least try to help you.

“Do you… want to talk about it? We have ice cream… I could get you some of that. Or maybe you just want to soak in a warm bath by yourself. I could get one started for you.” thinking about it for a moment you looked into his eyes. Gathering words to speak, you sighed.

“It happened when I was a kid. You probably figured that out though. Some ice cream sounds good.” Dazai nodded reaching out to you before pulling back. He flipped the light on, noticing your tears, anger rose over him. It didn’t matter when this happened, it pained him to see you like this. If he knew who had inflicted such a trauma, he might lose all ability to hold himself back. He was protective like that. He hated seeing anybody lay even the smallest sliver of pain on you.

He came back with the whole tub. Setting it next to you, he watched as your lips curled into a small smile, though it was forced. He took a seat near the headboard, keeping a distance from you as you’d asked. “Can I play with your hair?” He truly wanted to make you feel comfortable and safe. He’d always protect you. No matter what kind of situation it was. Be it something mental or physical, he wanted to make it known he cared.

Nodding your head, you waited for his fingers to lightly run through your hair. He rubbed at your skull in soft massaging motions. His hands never left the specific spot he’d asked to touch. He never brushed his hands against your neck, nor did he lean too close. He had a history of being one of those men. A womanizer, somebody who treated them as if they were objects. You woke him up to that. He’d found somebody to love. It didn’t matter your gender, you’d given him a real good scolding when you learned of his flirtings and habits. He now sees why you freaked out on him. “You’ve really changed for the better,” you whispered the words as you spooned more of the sweet into your mouth.

His head tilted when he noticed you read him like a book for a moment. “I guess…” he mumbled, wanting so badly to lean down and kiss the top of your head. He withheld doing anything you didn’t specifically say you wanted, or he could do. “Can I move my hands to your shoulders?” there was hesitation but you nodded, feeling his hands delicately trail down; leaving the softest touches. They were comfort touches, nothing more than that; His fingers didn’t linger or halt. They reached the edge of your shoulders before going back to the top of your head and trialing back.

They felt nice, these were the kinds of touches you enjoyed. Soft and delicate brushes wrapped with affection and worry. Shifting your weight back, you ended up brushing your back against his legs. You didn’t flinch knowing he wouldn’t do anything. Though it still made your heart panic for a moment. “Could you do that with my arms?” you mumbled the plea softly.

Hesitating, Dazai nodded, taking two of his fingers and brushing them along your arm. He stopped above your wrists and moved his hand back to your head, running them down again. You sat in silence, listening to his calm breaths and basking in the soft feeling of his hands. “Are you alright if I pull you closer? Just a hug, you can say no. It's your body I'd never want to invade you. You're in control here, okay? I’m only ever going to touch you when you want it, and where you want it.” he was reassuring you he’d never try anything. Inhaling you nodded. You made the first move. Slipping onto his lap you gave yourself time to adjust and feel comfortable. Your hands grabbed his, wrapping them tightly around yourself.

It was such a small thing, but you pressed into the contact. You had no idea how much you needed something like this. To be in control of a situation, to feel safe in another person's embrace. To trust them and feel nothing but a strange comfort. The disgusted feeling was pulled away as you snuggled into him. Leaning your head on his arm, tears fell, but they were the kind of tears that fell under the sun; When there were few clouds but speckles of water still fell. Dazai moved his thumb under your eye, wiping such tears from your cheek. He leaned down and planted the softest kiss there. The kiss was only meant to give comfort, and that is what it did.

At some point within his gentle hold, and whispers that told you how much he cared, you fell asleep; He whispered soft mumbles of how much he would always adore you, no matter what you looked like, what you went through, or what you did; He soothed you into a peaceful sleep. Laying you down he didn’t let you go from his arms. Keeping you in the comfortable closeness, he closed his eyes, slowly he drifted into dreams.

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literaila · 4 years

Text

we work so well between the lines

spencer reid x reader

warnings: angst. cause... thats all i can write. theres a lot of anxiety mentions, and panicking so if thats triggers you just click away..... again its pretty shitty. please enjoy.

Y/N was still working.

Lately, it seemed, she’d been working later and later, with barely any space between each report she filled out. She woke up and got on her computer, she worked until late afternoon when there was no chance of her ignoring the monster in her stomach, and once she was finished eating she was back to work. And then at almost one in the morning she went to sleep for four hours. Then woke up and did it again.

It was an unorganized schedule.

She ignored her phone, ignored the different notifications coming in, ignored her friends who kept asking if she was busy, if she could come out that night. She didn't have the energy to answer them, didn't have the energy to focus on anything but work.

She stayed in her pajamas all day, her hair was greasy and her skin was dry. She was too busy working to take a shower.

She was waiting for a phone call, just one. She was waiting for him to call her, waiting in the living room that they shared, in the apartment that was theirs, waiting for him in the home that they had made together. She was just waiting. She missed him so much.

Y/N pretended she wasn't. She pretended she was just so caught up in her work, she just had so much work to do, she just couldn't be doing anything else. The work needed her, she thought over and over again. She pretended that working, and barely eating, and not showering, and just working in a house that hadn't been cleaned in days, she pretended all of that was normal.

She was so good at pretending.

There was a part of her- the part that wouldn't shut up in her mind, that wouldn’t just leave her alone. The part that refused to pretend with the rest of her- that knew something was missing. Knew that she was still waiting for a text, a call, even an email. But the same part of her knew it wouldn't come, knew that she was just pretending, knew that she was such a bad liar.

She didn't pay attention to that part.

She put it out of her mind. She pretended there was nothing she was waiting for, nothing at all.

And there wasn't anyone she was missing.

***

Spencer was exhausted.

The case was exhausting.

His job was exhausting.

He felt like laying down and never waking up. That's how tired he was.

It stayed silent on the plane ride home, the entire team had been gone for almost two weeks. Two weeks of non-stop working, and new bodies, and screams. Screams that danced around their heads, and images they never could seem to forget.

None of them had enough energy to joke, or play cards, or even bother talking about the case.

Two weeks was scary for all of them, it was hard to be away from their families, from their own beds. It was scary to think it took them two weeks to find a murderer, it was sad to think about all the lives that were lost in the process.

Spencer was ready to get home, ready to feel the comfort of his bookshelves, and his soft bed. He was ready to get out of the hotel. He was ready to sleep without having to think about the murderer that was still running loose while they were sleeping.

It was late when they finally arrived back in Virginia, the sun had fallen, and you could barely see any stars.

None of them bothered saying goodnight, there was an unspoken agreement between the teams that they were just going home. They all just wanted to get home.

Hotch and JJ had their boys to tuck in, it was hard for both of them to be so far away from their babies for so long.

Derek and Emily wanted to get the last two weeks off of their minds, they wanted to relax within their own homes, a place where they both felt safe.

Penelope was safe at home, snoring while she slept, with no nightmares for the first time in days.

Rossi had not been as affected as the rest of the team, used to staying away from home, but he was ready to get back to his kitchen.

And Spencer was just ready.

It took effort for him to stay awake on the drive home, almost dozing off more than a couple of times as his eyes begged to be shut. Eventually, he made it though, back to his apartment that he hadn't seen in two weeks.

He was ready to see Y/N, ready to talk to her, to see her face, to feel her skin. He was ready to sleep next to her again, ready to feel her body heat, ready to wake up to her face. Ready to sleep.

It was terrifying to leave her alone in their small apartment for two weeks, terrifying to be so far away from her. It was so hard not to call her all the time, to check up on her, make sure he was okay. But he did, and he was sick of it.

He just wanted to see her.

He missed her so much, it was a constant ache in the bones, in his blood, in his mind, reminding him of just how much he missed her. Reminding him of just how often he was gone, leaving her all alone.

He needed to see her.

***

It had started when she was little. It started when her parents started leaving her alone.

When they would go out, sometimes with their friends, sometimes for work, sometimes to get dinner, when they would leave her all alone.

She wasn't good alone. She wasn't good at being left alone.

Her parents never knew what happened when they left. They never knew how she would lock each door and every window, over and over again, just to make sure she thought, just to make sure it's all okay. They never found out about the phone she used to call 911 when she heard a creak in the walls, when she was worried there was something wrong. They never knew about the 911 dispatchers who had to reassure her, they never found out about all the times she called them. They never knew that she would sit at the window, watching and waiting for their car to come home. They never knew about the panic attacks she would have when someone knocked on the door, when someone wanted to talk to her.

They never knew about any of it.

Her anxiety had always built up the longer someone was gone and had always been a big hole in her chest that would only get bigger with time.

She learned how to cope, she learned how to stop worrying, how to make sure no one ever knew about how much she worried.

It had taken years to stop freaking out every time someone walked out the door.

When she was 16 she thought she had it under control. She thought she had filled the hole so far, so high that she would never be afraid of someone being gone again.

She was wrong.

She was so so wrong.

The hole stayed with her, buried in a place she couldn't reach, getting deeper and deeper with each day that went by.

She hadn't heard from Spencer in a week.

***

Spencer had attempted to be quiet when he got home, even with how tired he was he didn't want to wake his girlfriend up. She needed her rest as much as I do, he thought.

He was putting his shoes next to the door and hanging his satchel up when he noticed all the lights were still on. He didn't pay any mind to it, figuring Y/N had left them on when she went to bed on accident. His eyes were drooping and his back felt like it was going to collapse, so he quickly hurried into their bedroom.

Spencer dropped his bag on the floor, planning to unpack it and do laundry when he didn't feel 10 minutes away from passing out. He smiled at his girlfriend who was lying in bed, sleeping softly. He climbed into the covers with her, pulled her close to him, smiled, and fell asleep.

***

Someone was touching her.

Someone grabbing her.

Someone was behind her and she was wrapped under their arms, and they were squeezing her, and she had no idea who they were, she didn't know them someone was holding her.

It was too tight.

Y/N tried to push against their arms, tried to move them away, far far away, so far that she wouldn't be able to see them, she just wanted them to go far far away.

Spencer could feel something pushing his arms, but he just figured Y/N was moving.

It was only when she started screaming he woke up.

She was screaming, and she was telling whoever was holding her, holding her against them, holding her against her will, she was telling them to just, just get away because she had no idea who they were and she just wanted them to get away. Just get away.

Spencer didn't know what to do.

He let her go and tried to sit up but she was faster than him. She was jumping out of bed and crawling across the floor in a matter of seconds. Her face was red, and her breathing was rapid, and her hair was a mess, and her face was terrified, it was terrified and Spencer didn't know what to do.

“Y/N…” he said while walking toward her, walking toward his crying girlfriend.

She started screaming again as he got closer.

“Okay! Okay Y/N... I won't come any closer. I’m not going to move any closer baby.” He said softly, he just wanted her to stop crying, to stop screaming he just wanted to go over and hold her, but he was just barely awake, and his mind wasn't quite functioning normally.

“Get out! Get out! You need to leave- I- I- I need- I need” Y/N said as she started to gasp, as her voice got caught, and she was grabbing at her throat, and pulling her hair, and trying to breathe, she was just trying to breathe, but she was scratching at her skin, and hyperventilating, and she couldn't think. She couldn't breathe.

She was scratching at her skin, trying to get it off, trying to breathe, trying to get away. She was going to hurt herself.

“Y/N! Don't-” Spencer said, much louder than last time, as he tried to take a step toward her. But he could see the way she recoiled when he had just barely moved, he could hear the way her breathing had gotten even faster, and she was staring up at him like he was a monster, and so he stopped. “Y/N hey I need-” he swallowed trying to get her attention “I need you to stop doing that you’re going to hurt yourself-”.

But Y/N wasn't listening, her ears were pounding and all she could hear was beeping, just loud beeping right in her ear. And she still wouldn't couldn't breathe. Why wouldn't her body just breathe?

She gasped again.

“Y/N Okay, okay I’m- fuck- I’m going to, I’m gonna- “

It was then that she started gasping out words.

“Spencer- I need- I need! I need I need I need- Spe-” And she was still trying to breathe and she was still trying to speak, and Spencer was still trying to figure out what he could do if he couldn't touch her, he just wanted to fucking touch her and he couldn't, and if he could just hold her if he could just grab her and and help her if he could just-

“Spencer! I need I need-” a pause to gasp again. “I need Spencer! I need my boy-” gasp. “Boyfriend- he- he just- where- where-” she tried to catch her breath again, she tried to breathe just one more time “where is he!? Where did he go!?! He said- he said-”

And she was staring at Spencer, she was staring at her boyfriend, at the man she was asking for, and she was scared, and she was angry and Spencer felt himself crumble at his own name.

She’s calling for me, he thought, she's calling for me but I’m right here and what can I do, what can I do, I’m right here, he said over and over again in his mind.

And Y/N was still staring at him, still not looking at him just staring, still gasping, still clawing at her own skin, still waiting for him to do something.

“Y/N, I’m right- I’m right here. Y/N, baby, it's Spencer. I’m right here.” He was staring at her, hoping she’d understand, hoping he could go over and hold her and just hold her.

It seemed as if Y/N was struck out of her gaze, and she was looking Spencer up and down and she was actually seeing him now and she finally managed to gasp out

“Spencer.” and her voice was rumbling, and her hands were shaking, but she looked relieved now, and Spencer could tell so he went to her.

He went to her, and he grabbed her face, and she gasped again but even louder and it seemed the air was finally making its way to her lungs, and she grabbed at his hands which were still on her face desperately.

And all Y/N could think about was how Spencer was finally there, he was there and he was fine, and she was fine and he was there.

Spencer held her face in his hands, and wiped her tears with his hands, and kissed her forehead over and over again, feeling immensely relieved that he could finally touch her, that he could finally just touch her.

Y/N was still crying, and she was clawing at Spencer's shirt, and he took the hint and he moved to pick her up.

And he held her. He held her so tight the world was finally in focus and Y/N knew exactly where she was, and she knew that he was okay, and she could breathe, and the hold was being filled with each breath they shared.

He tried to ask her what was wrong, but it only caused her to cry harder, so he just held her, he just basked in her warmth, and tried his best to make her feel better. Tried his best to just be there for her, to just hold her.

They stayed like that for several minutes.

Both of them breathing slowly, and together, Spencer holding her and stroking her hair, and repeating “it's okay, it's okay, it's okay” over and over because it was the only thing he knew how to do.

And she was breathing, and she was fine, and she wasn't scared anymore, and they were just breathing together, just holding each other.

It was a while before they decided to move off of the floor.

Spencer gently tapped her shoulders, and softly said “let's get up sweetheart” and it took Y/N a moment to recognize the words, it took her a minute to nod. Spencer let go of his tight grip on her, and together they stood up.

Y/N was dizzy and Spencer had to help her walk. He helped her lay down, and went to his side of the bed, and held her under the covers, and stroked her hair, and just listened to her quiet breathing.

They both laid there, content with just calming down, with just taking a moment to breathe from their bed and think separately.

Y/N knew she was going to have to say something, she knew that she had to say something to him, had to explain what had happened, that she couldn't just hide her anxiety in a box and shove in a room to never be discovered again. She couldn't do that anymore. But she wasn't going to be the first to talk. She wasn't going to talk if she didn't have to.

She wasn't the one who made the choice.

Spencer, who was just thinking about her, thinking about how he’d never experienced something like that with Y/N before, thinking about how he must have been missing something because there was clearly something wrong, he was the first to talk.

“Y/N? Are you… are you okay?” he said softly in her ear, trying to not push her any further, he knew she must be exhausted.

Y/N's voice was sore, and her muscles ached from exhaustion, and her chest still felt tight, but she finally managed to answer “yes, I’m fine now.”

“You- you weren't fine though.”

She didn't say anything, just nodded against his chest, breathing him in.

“What happened?” he asked after a moment.

Y/N swallowed and could feel tears pricking at her eyes, tears that she refused to let out. “I- it's just been a- I didn't realize you were home.” They were the only words she could bring to her head, and she still had no idea how to explain anything that happened.

Spencer didn't understand, and he wasn't satisfied with that answer.

“I’ve come home before late at night… you didn't-” he paused trying to find the right words “this has never happened before.”

Y/N could feel herself nodding but she still had no idea what to say. She still had no idea how she was feeling.

“Can you tell me what happened? I’m- I’m not trying to push you… but we can't just leave it like this.”

“I just-” Y/N sighed, moving away from Spencer to sit up. If she was going to have this conversation she was going to do it right. “I haven't heard from you in a while, and I was worried, and I didn't- I didn't know you were coming home, and I thought you were someone else- and I was just- I was just scared.” her voice was shaking as she explained, and she was picking at her nails trying not to look her boyfriend in the eye.

He was frowning, looking down at her hands and trying to think. “I don't understand, I- We’ve been talking, and you were scared? I don't-”

“You haven't texted me in a week, Spencer.” Y/N's voice was hard, filled with some frustration and some confusion.

“Yes I- I’ve-” Spencer was looking at her shocked, thinking, trying to remember when the last time they talked was. “I have- I have?”

“No. You haven't. I haven't heard from you since you told me the case wasn't finished, last Friday.” Y/N was looking at him now, looking at the way his entire face fell as she explained, watching the way his eyes winced almost as if he was in pain.

“I didn't- I was-”

“And I know you were busy with a case, and I know that I wasn't as important, I understand that I really do-” Spencer tried to cut in but she kept going “I was really worried though, I had no idea what you were doing or what was going on or when you were coming back or if you were okay. And I was just really worried, and I was trying not to be because it's not your job to make me feel okay and I- '' her rambling was cut off my Spencer's harsh tone.

“Yes, it is.” He stared at her, his face unmoving.

“No, it's not Spence and-”

“Yes, it is. Of course, it is. Jesus Christ, you’re my girlfriend! It's my job to make sure you’re alright, and even if it wasn't I can at least take the time to text you!”

Y/N recoiled at his angry tone, even though she knew none of it was directed at her.

“Oh Y/N... no, it's just. It's okay, I’m not going to hurt you-” she nodded at his words, still watching him trying to figure out what he was thinking “ it's just, I can't believe I didn't even text you. God, I'm-”

“Spence, I’m not mad. Really I'm not mad, I’m just I’ve always been so terrible at being left alone, and usually, it's fine, but I don't know- I was- just so anxious and I couldn't stop it and I was so worried, and I knew you were just working that's” she swallowed trying to let her mind catch up to her mouth “that's why I didn't call you.”

“I wish you had I-”

“No, work was the most important thing, I didn't want to bother you.”

Spencer was looking at her shocked, just completely shocked that she could ever say something like that.

“Y/N.. you’re the most important thing. You always are, you’re the most important thing in my life. And you could never bother me, especially not with just a phone call.”

It was Y/N's turn to look shocked, she didn't expect that type of reaction from Spencer.

“Don't look so shocked, please. You are my favorite person. You are the only person I want with me at all times. And I’m sorry we’re apart so much, I’m sorry my job takes me so far away from you.” Y/N could hear the desperation in his voice, could see the honesty in his warm brown eyes.

“It's okay Spencer, your passion for your job is one of the things I love most about you. And when we’re apart for so long, it feels amazing to be together again.” She brought his hands up to her lips and kissed it as a way to show her belief in the words she was saying.

“I never want you to feel anxious about me. I want you to call me when you’re worried, I want you to tell me everything because I care about you. Okay?” He asked looking right into her eyes.

“Okay.. yeah… okay.” She said looking down again.

Spencer grabbed her face and brought it to his so they were looking at each other again. They were so close, and both of them felt their heart speed up at just the proximity of the pair.

“Okay?” Spencer asked, almost in a teasing voice, trying to make sure she understood completely.

“Okay.” She said as she brushed her lips against his feeling like she was home for the first time in weeks. They were both restless as their lips moved against each other, Y/N could feel Spencer's hands hold on to her face desperately, trying to keep her as close as possible.

They broke apart and smiled at each other. Spencer looked down and frowned, and Y/N looked down with him.

They were both frowning at the red marks on her chest, the scratches that she had made, the dried blood that was there reminding them of how desperate she was to escape.

Spencer rubbed his thumb over the marks, feeling terrible for everything that had happened.

Y/N looked at him frowning and moved his chin so he would look at her. She smiled at him softly in reassurance, in a message that it was okay, that it wasn't his fault.

“How about we go take a shower?” he asked, looking at her again, not smiling but not frowning “I’ll help you clean up, and I’ll wash your hair?”

Y/N smiled even wider “I’d like that.”

“Yeah?” Spencer said, a smile finally reaching his face and making Y/N world so much brighter.

“Yeah.” She said, and she kissed him again, just so they could be close.

my masterlist here

#spencer reid smut #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds rp #criminal minds headcanons #matthew gray gubler #emily prentiss x reader

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txemrn · 3 years

Text

The Missionary's Daughter

Ch. 1: "Meant to Live"

Need to catch up? Prologue: "It's Over"

Chapter Song Inspo: "Meant to Live" by Switchfoot

Series Song Inspo: "Changed by You" by Between the Trees

Pairings: Drake Walker x OC (Margot Hughes); Liam Rys x Riley Brooks

Series Warning: 🛑 for mature audiences only (🔞); series contains angst, language, NSFW🍋 material; trigger warning: heavy discussion/depiction of drug and alcohol abuse, suicide, religion, mental health; please be advised and exercise discretion

A/N: When I say that this took a village, it would be the understatement of the century! Huuuuuuuuge thank you to all of my amazing sweet writing sisters that encouraged me and helped me pull this together, but especially to @charlotteg234 for brainstorming and mapping this out with me, @kat-tia801 for doing the same, but then having to deal with me incessantly asking, "Does this sound right?" and @chemist-ana FOR GIFITNG ME MY FREAKING AMAZING MOODBOARD! It's SO beautiful, and it literally puts me in the mood to write about my Druggy Drake and Margot! Thank you so, so much, friend! Most of the characters and some of the plot belong to our friends at Pixelberry.

A palpable crackle ignites the sterile air of the staff locker room. To say she was ‘nervous’ is a painfully severe understatement to the jitters that spark from her fingertips. But, rather than dance chaotically like cut wires on pavement, she is lightning, mesmerizing, lighting up the sky with excitement and power.

***

Dressing for another Monday morning at her weekly volunteer job at the prestigious Cordonia Family OB/GYN, Margot Hughes swiftly shimmies a monogrammed ceil blue scrub top down her curves. Pulling her brilliant strands of autumn harvest into a high bun, she slips on her work clogs while nudging her locker closed with her knee.

Before leaving the changing area, she catches her visage in the mirror, the unflattering fluorescent lights casting more shadows onto her worried features. She can feel the rumble of her rapid heartbeat echoing in her ears; her chest constricts tightly as her breathing becomes shallow. Her eyes begin to sting with fear as the whites burn red, threatening with a glaze of tears.

Today is the day her entire life will change; everything she has ever wanted, everything that she has ever worked for will suddenly determine the course of her future in a single moment. Seeing the all-too-familiar terror in her eyes, Margot flutters her eyelids shut. Her fingers nervously trace along a simple chain around her neck until they finally grasp tightly to a dainty sterling silver charm: a cross.

“Take my anxieties, Lord,” she whispers with prayerful conviction, her sparkling blue eyes gracefully opening to look at her necklace. She exhales deeply. “Your will be done.” Margot stares at her reflection for a few more moments, focusing on her breathing to calm her restless heart. “You are strong, Margot. You've got this,” she affirms herself in a hushed tone, a bright smile breaking across her face. “This is your day--" suddenly overwhelmed with peace, a joyous smile paints across her face. Chuckling to herself, she glances upwards: “I'm counting on You.” Taking a deep cleansing breath, she eagerly exits the stillness of her thoughts, and joins the bustle of the morning's clinic appointments. Today is her day.

***

Halos of blurred auras bleach his vision as Drake cautiously opens one blood-shot eye. His tongue sticks to the roof of his roughly parched mouth as he massages his pained forehead. Clueless of what day it is--much less what he did last night--he is greeted with a sudden glorious sensation: a supple wet mouth on his hardened morning length.

His body relaxes back onto the dampened, disheveled sheets of his bed; he releases a pleasurable exhale as he blindly reaches for the head behind the lips. He strains to focus his view, but can only make out a foggy shape of a nude woman with long, tousled brunette waves.

It’s her. His love.

Drake smiles; delicately tangling his grip in her strands, he admires how even the afternoon sun catches her beauty perfectly. He quietly smacks his lips. He can still smell her on his stubble; he can still taste her on his tongue.

Had she told Liam? Were they celebrating that they could finally be together?

As she takes in the head of his girth, he arches his back, relaxing his body into her hungry touch. Closing his eyes, he offers a guttural groan deep in his chest as she swirls her tongue around his firm thickness.

“God, you’re incredible, Riley--”

---

Pulling out a pen, Margot reaches across the counter to grab a patient’s clipboard--that is until Iris, the front desk manager grips her long, manicured nails to the other side of the particle wood. “Miss Mary-Margaret,” she leans in conspiratorially, lowering her voice, “do we know anything yet?” Margot chuckles, shaking her head. “Child, you better come find me the moment you know!”

“Only if you promise to start calling me ‘Margot’” the young blonde jests, opening her client’s chart.

“How about I start calling you what we’ll all be calling you in just a few short years: ‘doctor’?” Rosy pink swirls splash across Margot’s face, warming her cheeks to the touch. She bows her head coyly at the mention of her dream becoming a reality. The thought that she will soon find out if a medical career is in her future makes the twenty-one-year-old’s heart leap with unbridled excitement.

For as long as she can remember, Margot has had a strong desire to serve and help other people. Much of that selfless attitude was instilled into her heart by her own parents. They were called to be Christian missionaries when Margot was only eight years old. After much planning, church fund-raising, and prayer, Roy and Mary Hughes left their comfortable home of Lafayette, Louisiana, and settled in the small Mediterranean country of Cordonia.

Many of their friends and family were shocked that the church would send them to such a beautiful area of the world. Typically missionaries humble themselves to serve the needy, the homeless, the lonely and the sick. They sacrifice the luxuries of home for the sake of loving humanity. They help people in war-torn countries, third-world countries, countries that don’t have electricity or running water. But, this country?

Cordonia itself is a lavish nation, rich in heritage and traditions. And funds. Thanks to the ideal weather conditions, the fruitful soil produces bountiful harvests and exquisite supplies for fine textiles that remain in high demand throughout the world. The Cordonian government, a monarchy, discovered a new opportunity to expand their wealth in the late 19th century: costly tariffs to international investors. Within the first ten years of increasing the taxes on exports, the national treasury was not only in the black, but their funds had exponentially increased every year. Farms were flourishing as the working class became larger, stronger.

But, the treasury began to dwindle quickly due to the extravagant demands of the royals. For the first time in the country's history, commoners were wealthier than some of the nobility. Disdain from the upper class quickly ensued until finally, in the early 20th century under the rule of William I, a new tax law was implemented to all of Cordonia: anyone involved with international exchange would have to pay into the treasury to handle such business.

Unfortunately, there were no limitations to this new tax law, and many farms floundered, property ownership being seized by the government. Families were uprooted; jobs were lost, and worse, assets were sold for even more money, filling the pockets of the greedy leaders. The people that once had a plethora of goods at their fingertips were now starving and unsheltered. And vengeful. The Cordonians were outraged by the gouging, many of them forming violent riots, banding together with outside influencers in hopes of overthrowing the government.

On the cusp of a civil war, King William I decided to rezone the country, providing a place for the displaced working class to claim safety and sanctuary, a place that would offer shelter, education, and more affordable options for goods. To appease the people even more, he named the project ‘the Core,’ paying homage to their greatest export, the Cordonian Ruby. It was also a way for him to forever express his gratitude for such a fruitful nation: they were the core reason the nation was thriving so richly.

Like many government-assisted programs, it didn’t take long for the cracks to show in the infrastructure. And with funding cuts over the years, the Core began to crumble, striking a sharp contrast from the rest of Cordonia. The Core, now often referred to as ‘the slums’, have become a breeding ground for crime, drugs, and prostitution. It is the blemish of Cordonia, its existence often not acknowledged amongst the elite.

But, according to the Hughes, ‘God saw the need’. They were sent to serve in the slums of Cordonia, starting up several free programs, including a nightly soup kitchen, afterschool programs to keep children out of trouble, and trade classes to help adults out of poverty. The people accepted the help and adapted quickly to the missionaries; but even more importantly, they embraced these Americans as their own, many of them forming important and lasting relationships with the Hughes.

But, still there was something missing, something that burdened the missionary’s oldest daughter: healthcare. Having good health and access to a doctor is still treated as a privilege in Cordonia, and time and time again, the curable were disabled or buried. A change needed to take place. And Margot, although unsure of how, knew she would devote her life in making it happen for the Cordonian people.

As she makes a few notes on her clipboard, an olive-complected arm stealthily reaches around Margot, gracefully grazing her sun-kissed skin before gently placing a cup of piping hot black coffee in front of her. Staring at the hand, she instantly knows who it is. And she titters, playfully rolling her eyes. “Tadd! Another coffee?” She grabs the coffee, twirling on the ball of her foot to face the clinic’s young ultrasound technician. "My tab must be over a hundred euros by now!"

"Oh, don't you worry about that," he chuckles, rocking on his feet. “Plus, I figured with your new gig at Bríki--” he jovially shrugs his shoulders.

“You figured what?” Margot playfully punches his shoulder. “That I could sneak you free coffee?” She gives a mischievous smile, raising an eyebrow. “I don’t think Mr. Pavlis would appreciate me offering free drinks, especially since I haven’t even started yet--”

“That’s right!” Tadd eyes widen. “Today’s the day--!”

“As if I didn’t already have enough to be nervous about today,” Margot’s voice becomes shaky, as she clenches her teeth in a forced smile.

“Hey,” Tadd’s voice turns into an endearing whisper. He shifts his head until his piercing jade eyes meet Margot’s baby blues. “You have nothing to worry about. We both know you did well on that American doctor test--"

"The MCAT," Margot stifles a laugh, rolling her eyes into an appreciative grin.

"Whatever," a crooked smile grows across Tadd's handsome features. "And as far as the coffee shop, you're a fast learner. And a hard worker. Plus, if they see what we all see in you--" he sighs, his gaze never breaking free from hers, "-- they're going to love you."

Margot looks down at her feet, hugging her clipboard tightly to her chest. Feeling her palms begin to sweat, she coyly looks back up at her dear friend. "Thanks, Tadd."

After a few silent moments of staring at each other, Tadd clears his throat. "So, um--" he starts, "have you heard anything yet? About the test?" Tadd changes the subject. Margot shakes her head as she takes a pull from her coffee. "Well, when you do, um, maybe we could, I mean, I thought we could--"

Suddenly an intercom buzzes overhead. "Thaddeus to exam room four. Thaddeus to exam room four."

Tadd furrows his eyebrows, looking to the ceiling before resting a kind half-smile back on Margot. "Duty calls," he nervously sighs as he bounds down the hallway. Halfway down the corridor, he spins around to face Margot. "Hey, um, come find me! Before you leave at noon!" He finger-guns the air before returning to his pursuit.

Margot awkwardly finger-guns him back before smacking her forehead with the palm of her hand. "Seriously, Margot?" she mutters to herself, turning her attention back to the central desk of the clinic; however, she realizes quickly that the attention is all on her.

"When are you two going to make it official, Miss Mary-Margaret?" Iris chokes in the midst of her belly laughs, nodding with other scrub-adorned coworkers.

Biting her bottom lip feeling her heart flutter, Margot straightens out her demeanor, becoming stoic. "I--I don't know what you're talking about--"

"Margot, isn't it obvious?" Chimes in a jolly intake nurse. "That boy loves you--!"

"Who? Tadd?" Margot feigns innocence. She fixes her attention to the chart as she scribbles down more notes. "It's not like that--I mean, we're not, um--" she sighs. "We're just friends--" An instant roar of laughter abrupts from the reception desk, making it impossible for Margot to hide her toothy-smile paired with her scrunched up nose.

"You say that now, baby girl--"

"That's right," chimes in another giggling co-worker, "friends for now!"

An older plump nurse places a tender hand on Margot’s hand, a knowing smile spreading across her face. "Some of the best relationships come from friendships, moró. Give it time. Let the love grow," she winks at Margot.

Margot fidgets with her pen, delicately licking her bottom lip. She then tries to form words with her mouth, but no sound is heard. Her pink cheeks reveal she is flustered. She quickly closes up the chart, pushing loose hairs behind her ear. "Have a good day, ladies."

Hearing the squeals of her coworkers diminishing behind her, Margot quickly escapes into an empty exam room. Closing the door behind her, she leans against it, looking up at the textured ceiling tiles. She can feel the butterflies in her stomach bouncing through to her heart as her legs wiggle with weakness like gelatin.

The idea of 'falling in love' excites Margot, an idea she has dreamed about ever since she saw Baby meet Johnny. But, so far in her young life, she has never experienced it first hand, let alone a romantic hand- hold. Was this love? All she knew for sure was today was not the day to figure it out.

***

As soon as Riley’s name escapes his breathless moans of ecstasy, a searing sharp pain instantly ignites around his hardened girth. And Drake sees red.

"Fuck!" He lets out a guttural roar until no sound comes out of his mouth. He gnashes his teeth, trying to breathe through the agony, but only froths at the corners of his lips. The veins in his neck and his forehead protrude violently as streams of tears roll down his face. Petrified to move, his face turns a deep ruddy color. Before turning violet.

A sudden sensation of relief washes over him as the stabbing sensation fades to throbbing. Drake nervously looks down at his softening cock, relieved to see his member in one piece. "Goddamnit, Brooks," he pants furiously, "you fucking bit me--"

The brunette quickly tosses her curls out of her eyesight right before her fist meets Drake's jaw. "Oh, shit!" The cracking of the joints in his face echoes around the room. Drake starts to gently massage his chin. "You're not Riley--"

She climbs off of his body, standing her naked body in front of him. "No shit, Sherlock!" She slinks her short black spaghetti-strap dress over her dangerous curves before hastily grabbing her clear platform heels and racing out the door. "Fuck you, Drake Walker!"

***

A heartless, cocky laugh pours over the phone speaker. "Shit, Walker. Just--" the baritone voice trails back into a fit of laughter.

"It's not funny, Leo--" Drake warns, accidentally shifting his weight in bed, stirring a soreness to his recent injuries. "Ow!” he sucks air quickly between his gritted teeth, “fuck!" he whimpers to himself, adjusting the cold packs on his genitals.

"But you actually called her a different name, bro. A different name! With her mouth on your salami, your pocket rocket, on your--on your anaconda--" Leo's words fade back into cackles.

"As if you remember every goddamn hook-up’s name--"

"Dude," Leo interrupts, "if she's going to go all hungry, hungry hippo mid-blowie, I'm going to remember her name."

Drake scoffs. "Bullshit--"

"What? I'm serious, bro" Leo's voice becomes sincere. "All of these bitches we meet are looking for one thing--" he pauses dramatically for his wounded friend to finish his sentence; but the silence proves Drake is clueless as to where Leo was going with this. "A connection, Walker!" Leo's voice drips with conviction. "These women don't want to feel like they're disposable, even though--" he chuckles to himself, “let’s be honest: we’re doing them a favor--”

"--’A connection’, Leo" Drake interrupts, urging the conversation back on track.

"Right! ‘A connection," reaffirms Leo, circling back to his point. "Now, okay,” he knowingly titters, “I can’t remember all of these names--”

“Ha! See?” Drake barks.

“--Which is why--” Leo enunciates over Drake, “I use a single pet name. ‘Girl’.”

"'Girl'? That’s your trick? You call them 'girl'?" Drake raises an eyebrow in disbelief.

“Hear me out,” Leo continues. “If you call them something like ‘baby’ or ‘sweetie’, it can be seen as patronizing, that you’re clearly looking to smooth-talk your way into their pants--” Drake rolls his eyes, moving the phone to his other ear “--but now, calling them ‘girl’, I’m showing I want to be a friend, that I just simply want to connect. And then when you’re having your way with her, call her whatever the fuck you want as long as you finish the name with ‘girl’. Good girl. Dirty girl. Naughty girl. Sweet girl. Or in your case, hungry girl--”

Drake clears his throat, stifling a laugh. “--That is the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard--”

“Hey!” Leo interjects. “Who is wearing a bag of frozen peas on his one-eyed trouser snake?”

“Touché,” Drake sighs. “So, where are you right now?”

“With Jason up at his shop.”

“Who?” Drake lets out yawn, looking at his bedside alarm clock.

“Shit, Walker, you really were fucked up last night," Leo sighs. "Jason. You met him last night.” Leo’s voice lowers into a whisper. “He helped you get fucked up last night.”

“Oh! Right, right,” Drake rubs his head, “that was--wow, that shit was--”

“Good, right?” Leo finishes. “Hey, come join us at his shop. We’ve got coffee, and he’s got some new, um, product he’d love to show you--”

“Oh, Leo, I don’t know--” Drake removes the melting bag of vegetables from his lap. Gently lifting up on the waistband of his boxers, carefully inspecting his bruised parts.

“Does Liam have you working today?”

“No, no, it’s not that--” Drake hesitates.

“Oh!” Leo knowingly exclaims. “Does Riley have you working today?” He begins to chuckle. “You might need to let her know that you’re currently indisposed for --”

“Leo--” Drake warns.

“Then what's the hold up?"

Drake glances over at the mirror affixed to his antique dresser, but he doesn't recognize his own reflection. There's an emptiness in eyes, an inexplicable turmoil overcoming the man he once was. How did everything get so complicated? How did he get to such a place that it's better to be absent in life than to live it?

She was just a friend--at least that's what he convinced himself when Riley Brooks first caught his eye. Beautiful. Extremely witty with a fight he had never seen before. When they first kissed, he swore it was a mistake. Hormones. It had been so long since he had touched the delicate petals of a woman's lips.

But, this wasn't just any woman. It was her. And he soon would find himself wrapped up in her bedsheets, wrapped around her finger, wrapped in an awful web of lies.

And, all of his transgressions were against him, his very best friend, the man he regards as closer than a brother, his closest ally and confidant. Normally, Drake would turn to Liam in a heartbeat with any troubles, but this? How could he? How could he talk to Liam about his own devastation when the truth would devastate Liam?

It's been four days since that fateful night of Liam's coronation, four days since the love of Drake's life walked away from him, forcing his hand into harboring secrets from the crowned prince. It's been four days since Drake heard his own voice in his head, four days since he's been sober enough to even think. Even though he deemed the temporary escape necessary, the sudden twinge of discomfort in his groin makes him realize that taking another hit right now is the absolute last thing he needs.

"I think I better stay put," Drake answers, combing his fingers through his disheveled tresses.

"Suit yourself," Leo jovially retorts. "If you need any oxy for your boo-boo, hit me up--Oh, and Drake?"

“Hrmmm?”

"Her name is Whitney."

"What?"

"Jaws? You know, the bitch who chewed on your Moby Dick?" Drake sighs heavily, regretting that he ever told Leo what had happened. "Her name is Whitney."

Drake furrows his eyebrows. "Now, how do you remember her name--?"

"Oh, bro, you don't forget WAP Whitney--oh shit, you probably haven't gotten a good look at your sheets this morning, have you?"

With a grunt, Drake ends the call. “Fuck me,” he mutters under his breath. He carefully gets up, waddling to grab his clothes before heading to the bathroom to get ready for the day.

In the middle of splashing his face with cold, soapy water, Drake's phone rings. Grabbing a hand towel he carefully saunters back to his room, answering the call without hesitation. "Just let it go, Leo--”

"Drake?"

An icy chill shoots down Drake’s spine, freezing him in his steps. He knows that melodic voice anywhere, a voice that reminds him of early morning sunrises and late night silver moonlit paths. “H-hey, Riley,” he stutters, caught off guard. A brief awkward stillness falls over the conversation. “How are you--?”

“I miss you, Drake,” she interrupts.

Drake’s vision suddenly begins to spin as the air in the room becomes stagnant. Stiffening his bottom lip in anger, his breathing quickens as he reaches out carefully to brace himself against the wall.

“Drake?”

“I’m here,” he chokes out. “What do you want, Brooks?” He can hear the tears in her voice, but he wills himself not to care, he wills himself to not even ask.

“Drake, I think I made a mistake--”

“No,” Drake barks out, “no, you can’t do this to me--”

“Drake, please,” Riley sobs, “I’m on my way to the doctor--”

“The doctor?” Drake’s tone suddenly changes. “Are you okay? Is everything with--um, you know--” he slaps his forehead with the palm of his hand, “--okay?”

“Yes--” she sniffles, “--no. I just, I can’t do this alone, Drake. I can’t do this--”

“Riley--” he roughly says her name to grab her attention, “you made your decision: you chose Liam. You want to raise our baby--my baby with him--”

“Don’t you think I want to have this baby with you? That’s all I can even think about Drake,” she takes a moment to calm down her shaking voice. “I love you, Drake. I want a life with you. I want you to be there when this baby is born, when this baby needs his or her father--when this baby needs you--”

“Riley--” Drake exhales with frustration, pinching the bridge of his nose, “--but Liam--”

“I know, Drake. I know--” Riley takes a deep breath, “Can we just talk? In person? Just so we can figure this out? I can come over there--”

“Brooks, I--” Drake stumbles over his words as he runs his fingers over his coarse, overgrown stubble. Of course, he wants her to come over. And to stay. But, has anything changed? Liam just proposed, and she made it clear what her intentions were. But, still, it’s possible she had a change of heart, and this was a second chance he may never get again. He sighs heavily. “Sure. Okay."

After finishing his impromptu conversation with Riley, Drake realizes he needs to make another phone call. He scrolls through his call history, and clicks the green send button.

"Did you change your mind, Evander Holyfield?"

"Funny, Leo," Drake sarcastically responds. "So, yeah, um, what's the address to the shop?"

***

“Does that--does that say what I think it says?” Margot nervously stammers. "I think I saw my score--oh gosh!"

“Here. Let me look--”

Margot quickly covers the computer screen with her hands, "No, Mrs. Iris!” Margot squeals. “I’m not ready--I’m not ready for this!”

“Child, you have been ready for this for months. Now, if you don’t get your hands out of the way--"

"What's with all the commotion?" A few technicians and nurses pile into the room, each giving an endearing rub to Margot’s back. Everyone begins craning their necks to see the computer, covered by Margot's arms. "Is it time? Have they posted the scores?"

"They sure have!" answers Iris before turning to Margot. She tucks several blonde wisps behind Margot’s ear before putting her finger under her chin. "C'mon, baby," she smiles encouragingly, "it's more fun celebrating than worrying."

"I'm--" Margot takes a deep breath, biting back her tears, "--I'm so scared--"

"--and the Lord knew you would be, baby." Iris wrinkles her nose at Margot, her voice becoming stronger. "That's why He called you to be courageous. C'mon."

Margot bites her lip, slowly nodding her head. Feeling the storm brew in her eyes as the weight of the world sits on her chest, she carefully peels back her hands. Her eyes scale the black and white on the screen, but nothing seems to make sense. A burst of silence overwhelms her hearing, time standing perfectly still. Her only company is the beating of her heart.

Take my anxieties...

You have nothing to worry about…

Your will be done…

Be courageous...

Like suddenly breaking through the surface for air, an abrupt roar of cheers fill the room, shaking Margot from her trance. "Our baby girl got a 519!" screams a tearful Iris, pulling Margot from her seat and into a tight embrace. Other coworkers join in, creating a giant group hug.

Margot remains speechless, shocked by her score. She always knew she was an excellent student, studying hard all through school and excelling in her classes. When it came to the MCAT, she was confident she would score better than average, a score of 500. But, to even be noticed by top medical schools, she needed to score in the top 5%, a score 517 or greater.

News swept like wildfire through the clinic, and shortly thereafter, Tadd and some other technicians filed into the breakroom with a decorative chocolate cake and punch in tow. "I knew you could do it!" Tadd cheers victoriously, offering a chaste hug to Margot. "Dr. Hughes," he swipes his hand in the air as if to paint an imaginary portrait. "It has a nice ring to it."

"I still don't understand why you put yourself through all of that," mentions an older phlebotomist. "Cordonia has a medical school right down the road--"

"Because Margot wants to go to one of the best medical schools in the world," interrupts a deeply demanding, yet sincere voice. “To Harvard. Like me.”

"Dr. Ramirez," Margot smiles brightly, jumping up to greet her mentor with a hug.

"That is, you are still looking at my alma mater for medical school--"

"Yes ma'am!" Margot's eyes light up with the thought that her dream of going to Harvard Medical School is becoming her reality. "It would be such an honor to go there, let alone to follow in your footsteps."

Dr. Ramirez pulls Margot in for another tight hug. "My word, Mary-Margaret, 519?" she presses her cheek to Margot's, "I am so proud of you."

"Thank you, Dr. Ramirez," Margot warmly responds, "thank you for taking a chance on me and helping me so much with my studies and research--"

"You know I did that for selfish reasons, right?" The practitioner stifles a smile while Margot squints her eyes with suspicion. "Cordonia needs more female physicians, and more importantly, physicians that will make a difference in its healthcare," she grips tightly to Margot’s hand, "for everyone. I believe you will lead this country in a health care reformation."

"I don't know what to say," Margot clears her throat as she fights back the tears. "I hope I make you proud--"

"You already do." Dr. Ramirez gently touches Margot's cheek lovingly before turning to exit the room.

"Oh!" Margot quickly chases after the obstetrician, “can I talk to you? Privately?” With a nod, Dr. Ramirez leads Margot into a quiet corner. “I know my work-study ends in two weeks--”

“I know. Don’t remind me, Margot--”

“Well, I was wondering,” Margot chews on the side of her mouth, fidgeting with her fingers, “if by any chance I could possibly stay on?”

“Oh, Margot, I wish I could. Unfortunately with budget cuts--”

Margot shakes her head. “No, no, Dr. Ramirez, I meant if I could stay on, shadowing my usual Monday and Thursday mornings, I mean, if that’s alright. Learn more? Keep up my skills?”

“You want to continue volunteering with us?” The doctor gives an inquisitive look. “Don’t you want to get a job to earn money before you move to the states next year?”

“I already got that covered,” Margot assuredly answers. “I just got a job at Bríki, the coffee shop past the square--”

“Oh my gosh,” Dr. Ramirez’s eyes light up. “Does Aleksi still own that place?”

“Mr. Pavlis? Yes! Him and his son run it together, I believe--”

“They have the best coffee,” she energetically smiles, “now I have another reason to stop by.” She kindly places her hand on Margot’s shoulder. “Of course, you can stay on as a volunteer. Whenever you want, however much you want. It is a pleasure to have you around.” With a squeeze of her arm, Dr. Ramirez turns to go to her next appointment, but stops halfway down the hall. “Oh, Margot? My nurse stepped away to make an important phone call. Do you mind escorting my next patient to the exam room?”

Margot dutifully nods with a grin. She twirls around, bounding for the front desk to grab the chart of Dr. Ramirez’s next patient, a new patient. After making a few small notes, Margot opens the door to call her back.

“Brooks? Riley Brooks?”

*****

Tags: (this is my original tag list for this series; if you wanted to be added or removed, please let me know!) @alyssalauren @ao719 @bbrandy2002 @burnsoslow @charlotteg234 @chemist-ana @choiceskatie @forallthatitsworth @gkittylove99 @glaimtruelovealways @kat-tia801 @khoicesbyk @lovingchoices14 @lovelyladyk88 @lucy-268 @mainstreetreader @marshmallowsaremyfavorite @neotericthemis @nestledonthaveone @sfb123 @shannonwrote @shewillreadyou @sweatyrysconnoisseur @taniasethi @tessa-liam @texaskitten30 @thefrenchiemama @thegreentwin @twinkleallnight @yourmajesty09

#the royal romance #the royal romance au #the missionary’s daughter #drake walker x oc #choices fanfiction #trr fanfiction #liam x riley

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deascheck · 3 years

Text

Sam Winchester's Love

Summary: You are in a relationship with Sam Winchester. You don’t feel deserving of his love as your depression causes you to sink into a deep rut. Sam does some research about depression and responds to your lapse in happiness with a gentle approach that ends with him showing you just how much he loves you.

Word Count: 2906

Warnings: talk of depression and suicide/death, angst, and all the fluff with some smut added in there.

A/N: First- I’ve never written smut before. So be nice! Second, I struggle with depression and anxiety, and wanted to write a fic that expresses what would help me (or hopefully anyone struggling as well) feel appreciated when I’m low. I bolded symptoms of depression to help people see what it feels like to have depression. These are not the only symptoms. If you identify with one or more of the symptoms, I encourage you to reach out to someone and start a conversation. It could be a complete stranger or a loved one. (I'm always a listening ear, too!) Whatever you’re most comfortable with. All “Google results” are from my own google search. The crisis text line is a real resource for you to use, if you find yourself in a mental health crisis.

Also tagging a couple people who might like to read. Sorry if that's overstepping! @winchester09 @that-one-gay-girl @supernatural-harrypotter7 @winchest09

The one good thing about living in a bunker was that there were no windows. Your room that you shared with Sam Winchester was no different. It meant no morning sun could wake you up, and you could keep the room as dark and cool as you wanted to. And on this particular morning, your depression had you keeping the room as dark as you possibly could.

You knew the boys would be wondering where you were, since it was 10:30, and you were always up by 8:00. But you couldn’t bring yourself to care. You couldn’t move, you couldn’t get dressed, brush your teeth or hair, or even get your legs swung over the edge of the bed. You were so emotionless that you couldn’t even cry. You simply didn’t care. Nothing felt important to you. You had no motivation to do anything except lie there in the gloom, curled around yourself, stuck in this dark rut.

You had no idea how much time had passed while you stayed there, motionless, until Sam came in, knocking softly as he opened the door. Your eyes glanced over to him and you could see the surprise and concern on his face at discovering your lack of activity.

“Y/N? Love, what are you still doing in bed? It’s 2:00 in the afternoon.”

You sighed. “I don’t care,” you said softly. “Nothing matters to me right now. I wish I would die. Then I wouldn’t be a burden to anyone anymore. No one would miss me.”

Sam knew you struggled with depression, but in the short time you’d been together, he had yet to see a truly deep depressive episode. It scared him, and he replied, “What? Y/N, I would miss you! You’re scaring me.”

You moved your head marginally to be able to look at him for real, and asked, “Would you let me be? I just need to be alone.” Your tone was expressionless, and it freaked Sam out.

He nodded and slowly and quietly closed the door. Once the door was latched firmly, Sam beelined for his laptop. He’d be damned if he was going to let you suffer alone and in silence.

Opening his computer, he typed in “symptoms of depression”. Among the results were, “fatigue, sleeping too much or too little, feelings of worthlessness or hopelessness, loss of interest in activities that once brought pleasure, appetite loss, feelings of sadness, loneliness, or ‘empty’ feelings, thoughts of suicide or death”. His eyes widened. You met every single one of those criteria for identifying depression.

Determined to help, he next googled “how to help someone with depression”. The answers ranged from helping the loved one cope, to opening a conversation with the loved one and getting them to talk about their feelings. Asking questions such as “What caused you to start feeling like this? How can I help you right now?” Stating things like, “You’re important to me. Your life is important to me,” or “You’re not alone, I’m here for you.”

One resource he found as he researched fervently was the crisis text line. It was a number (741-741) someone could text and speak to a certified individual about whatever their crisis was. Sam noted that in the back of his mind as something to bring up to you.

Sam nodded as he read. He knew he could do all these things. His biggest goal for you was for you to feel supported and loved. Seeing you in the state you were in concerned him and it had almost sent him in a tailspin of worry. But he would remain strong for you. You needed Sam to lean on if you were going to get up to see the light.

Sam noticed Dean wander in and motioned him over.

“Hey, I gotta talk to you about Y/N. She’s in a really bad depressive episode. She said she wanted to die.” Sam’s heart rate sped up with fear just saying those words. He swallowed and continued. “I’ve been looking up depression online and I think I know how to help her. But I could use your help.”

Dean quickly responded, “So that’s why she’s still in your room. Of course. What do you need?”

Sam answered, “I’m going to have a conversation with her and see if I can’t convince her to get out of bed. Actually, once we finish talking, I’m going to carry her out if she won’t walk. But I want to give her some ideas of simple things we could do as a group that would help her snap back to us.”

Dean nodded in agreement. “I think you’re on the right track. I dated a girl for like, a week, years ago who had depression, and getting outside really helped her she said. Maybe we could go on a walk with her down to the lake. Or hell, even loop around the bunker’s perimeter a few times.”

“That’s a good idea. I was also thinking something easier, like a movie night squished between us - something to show her she’s loved and not alone. Or maybe making dinner with us, so that she’s up and about but doesn’t really have to do much.” Sam ran his hand through his hair as he thought out loud.

Dean grinned. “Oh we’d show her she’s loved. She’s like my sister. She’s not going anywhere.”

His grin faded. “Hey, what if we took her on an easy hunt? Tried to get her back in the swing of things? Maybe it would distract her from the depression.”

Sam shook his head thoughtfully. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. She said she wanted to die, which makes me think that she might do something stupid on the hunt, like try to get killed. Or even just make a stupid mistake because her head isn’t in the game. No, I don’t think a hunt is the right option for her right now.”

“Of course. Duh. I should have known that,” Dean rolled his eyes in exasperation at his cluelessness. ‘I wouldn’t want to put Y/N in danger.”

Sam sighed. “Well, we’ve got some ideas. Let me go talk to her and see what I can get her to do. We’ll be out in a bit one way or another.”

Dean nodded and headed to the kitchen to grab a bite and some coffee before doing his own research on your debilitating ailment.

----

You still hadn’t moved since Sam had come into the room. Your mind felt empty, like everything had been drained from it. You just lay there quietly, waiting for nothing.

The door opened slowly, and Sam silently came in, shutting the door behind him. He didn’t say a word, just got in the bed with you and wrapped you up in his arms to hold you close. Your back against his chest, he tried to shelter you with his body, as if he could protect you from the dark thoughts. Sam wanted you to feel his love first before he tried to say anything. The two of you stayed like that for several minutes, the only sound in the room was the sound of two humans breathing softly. You hadn’t even known, but his touch was what you’d been needing. You soaked in the moment, grateful Sam was giving you space before speaking.

“Y/N?” Sam kissed the nook between your shoulder and your neck. “I want you to know you’re not alone. I’m here for you every step of the way.”

You didn’t respond, but it created the first semblance of emotion you’d felt all day. You could feel your eyes start to well up, not understanding how he knew exactly what to say to you.

“I don’t know what triggered your episode, but I think it would help if you talked it through with someone. It doesn’t even have to be me. You could text the crisis help line, and speak to someone through that. What do you think about that?” You could hear the hesitation in Sam’s voice, as though if he spoke too loudly or firmly he’d break you.

Sighing once again, you summoned the motivation to speak. “If I talk to anyone, I’d like it to be you.”

You could feel the smile on his lips as he again kissed you.

You drew in a shaky breath and decided to describe to him how you were feeling. You told him in a whisper about how you had no motivation, no gumption to do anything. How you felt worthless and unlovable. You told him how you felt he’d be better off if you just died so you weren’t a burden anymore and how you couldn’t bring yourself to care about anything today. As you spoke of your symptoms and feelings, you could feel a couple warm tears dripping into the crook of your neck and shoulder.

Once you finished, you felt Sam take a couple steadying breaths, clearly attempting to get himself together. “My love, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. If I could take this all away I would. But I’m here. I can share the weight of your burden. You mean the world to me. You are the farthest thing from a burden on me. You are the shining light in my life, guiding me and loving me. You have given me a reason to fight on. You are what I hold on to in my dark moments.” Here Sam paused, unsure whether he was overwhelming you or even getting through to you.

You turned in his arms so that your chest was facing his, your arms pressed against his chest as you brought your head to tuck under his. “Sam, I can’t tell you how much that helped me,” you said softly.

Sam took that as a cue and gently unwrapped one of his arms from your back and brought your head up to his. Tenderly, he pressed his lips to yours, sending you the message “I love you”. You allowed yourself to respond, capturing his lips with yours. Your kiss was sending the message, “Thank you.”

The two of you kissed delicately for a minute before your body began to respond. You pressed your mouth more firmly against his and adjusted your body to press closer against Sam’s. You brought one hand up and began to run it through Sam’s hair, something you knew he was crazy for. As the kiss began to become more passionate, you grabbed Sam’s hair at the roots and gently pulled, letting him know it was ok to take this a step further. He moaned a little against your mouth at the feeling of his hair being tugged on and involuntarily ground his hips into yours.

You automatically responded by thrusting your hips back against his. Sam broke the kiss long enough to look at you with an unspoken question in his eyes. You nodded, understanding his desire to show you just how much he loved you. Sam rolled you onto your back before resuming the kiss, running his tongue along your bottom lip, lazily requesting access to your mouth. You granted it, and began to explore his mouth with your own as if it were your first kiss. You could feel Sam slowly grinding against you, not rushing, but clearly feeling the need for some friction. His erection was bumping against your abdomen, and both of your breathing began to get shorter and heavier.

Not breaking the kiss, Sam lifted himself up on one arm and began pulling your nightshirt over your head. You allowed your lips to leave his only long enough to get the shirt out of the way and immediately brought your mouth to Sam’s again. His free hand roamed across your stomach, tracing lines in circles and random shapes as he made his way up to your breasts. Your breathing hitching, you moaned into the kiss as he began to massage your breast, pinching your hardened nipple. Your hips began to grind back against Sam’s, now also needing friction. Your arousal was beginning to pool between your legs, and you weren’t wearing panties.

Sam began to move his kisses down your jawline and to your neck, where he sucked through his teeth, determined to leave his mark on you. You cocked your neck to the side to allow him full access but he was already moving lower, taking your nipple in his mouth and swirling his tongue around it, sucking on it. He pulled off it with a pop, and moved to the next one. Sam then continued to work his way down your body, kissing every inch of your stomach, navel, and down to your inner thighs. You shuddered, his lips so close to your slick folds. Sam smiled against your leg. “You like that, sweetheart?” All you could do was whimper in response as you ground your hips desperately. “Ok,” he murmured. “Ok, love. Let me show you how much I love you.”

Sam ran his tongue between your folds and immediately you felt the tightness in your core begin. He knew every sensitive spot, every place to make you writhe in ecstasy. He sucked on your clit and slowly stuck a finger in your hole. You threw your head back, eager for him to insert another, which he obliged. He bent them and ran them against your walls, curling and pumping. Your juices squelched a bit, letting Sam know just how ready for him you were. He continued to run his tongue in swirls around your clit and through your folds as he finger fucked you. The tightness in your core becoming unbearable, you could feel your release coming. You moaned loudly and stuttered, “S-Sam, I’m gon-gonna…”

“Cum for me baby. Come on, that’s it. Good girl,” he praised as your orgasm exploded, pleasure coursing through your body, your pussy clenching around his fingers over and over again as he rode you through it.

You lay limp against the sheets, unable to form words. Sam looked up at you and chuckled. He slowly brought himself up along your body to recapture your lips with his, putting all his love and passion into the kiss. “Now do you know how much I love you?” he asked. You smirked. You could feel his erection pressed between your bodies. You wanted to feel him deep inside you, filling you, satisfying you. “Mmm I’m beginning to,” you murmured. “I might need you to show me more.” Sam smirked back at you and said, “As you wish, my love.”

He lined himself up at your entrance, rubbing his cock in your juices. Slowly, he pushed in, letting you adjust as he went. That was one thing you loved about him. Sam never rushed your body. He worshipped it. Once he was fully sheathed, he pulled halfway out, and slowly thrust back in, creating a slow, lazy pace that made you two feel like you had all the time in the world. As he thrust, he grabbed one of your legs, and put it over his shoulder, giving him a new angle, to get him deeper.

You moaned and your pussy clenched around his cock as he hit places that gave you waves of pleasure. He groaned as you clenched around him and sped up his pace, his balls slapping against your skin. Sam took his free hand and started rubbing your clit again, trying to help you get to your climax. His other hand held your hip in place as his pace picked up even more, almost becoming erratic as he got close to his release. You threw your head back again as you felt the familiar tightness building in your core. “Oh don’t stop. Oh Sam. Oh my god. Don’t .. don’t… ahhh!!” You came loudly and harder than last time, your back arching and your pussy milking Sam’s cock for all it was worth. Sam grunted - he couldn’t handle it, the tightness, the pulsing - and released inside you, jerking his hips, spurts of cum coating your walls.

Sam gently pulled out of you, his cum dripping from between your legs. He got up and grabbed a towel from the closet and quietly cleaned you up, careful to not be too rough. You lay there in heaven, a stupid smile on your face, unsure if you’d even be able to walk the next day. Sam crawled back into bed with you and gathered you in his arms. He pressed a soft kiss to your temple and said, “Do you believe me now? How much I love you?”

You smiled adoringly at him and whispered, “Yes, I do.”

Sam grinned. “Good. Because we have an activity outside the room that we’re going to do. And you need to be clothed for it.” He winked at you cheekily. “Dean and I were talking, and we brainstormed something the three of us could do that would help you feel less alone. So, let’s get UP,” he rolled you on top of him and then over him to get you to the side of the bed. “And dressed, and then we’ll go meet Dean.”

You smiled again at him, and good-naturedly shook your head as you got dressed. The darkness was gone for now. You knew it would be back, but you had ammunition to combat it the next time it came a-knocking. Sam Winchester’s love.

#supernatural #supernatural smut #supernatural fan fic #sam winchester x reader #sam winchester fanfiction #sam winchester #spn fic #deascheck

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creepypastaxmales · 3 years

Text

Hidden (Ticci Toby/Reader)

Warnings: NSFW

Words: 2,757

You felt anxiety fill you as you trekked through the woods, the sound of fauna crunching underneath your shoes just put you more on edge. You chewed on your already chapped lips, wondering why you were even out here in the first place.

"Come on, you scared, princess?" You flushed at the memory, that had pissed you off. You were no princess, not even a prince, yet you found yourself accepting the challenge. You were sure he was nuts, he hadn't spoken to you in a few weeks then he suddenly turns up and asks you to go to the area where everyone disappears?

Not to mention ditching you the moment you turned your back, you could see the sun beginning to set in the distance. A cold feeling filled your body, you rubbed your hands up your arms to try and sooth yourself however it hadn’t helped much.

You wanted to call out his name yet you feared he wouldn’t be the only one to hear you, there were countless stories piling up about people disappearing in here, hell some where even snatched right out of their bed. You shivered at the thought, screw him if he wanted to die out here he had that right but you wouldn’t.

The idea of some psychopath standing over you with a knife was enough to turn you sheet white and get your heart pumping. You turned tail and started walking back the way you came, at least you thought you were. Somehow it all looked different, you shook your head. That was impossible it was just your mind freaking out at the different angle.

You froze, the blood running through your veins suddenly felt ice cold. You looked around, doing a complete 360 on yourself yet spotting no one. You took a few breaths, it must’ve been your imagination. You continued on the way you thought would get you out of the creepy forest.

The feeling of impending doom slowly filled you, despite your best efforts to shake it off it felt like someone was watching you. Pretty closely too. You hugged yourself, hoping to bring some comfort to yourself.

You stopped upon hearing another set of steps, it sounded like they were right behind you. You quickly spun around only to see no one in sight. Your breathing was coming out ragged, anxiety squeezing at your heart. “I swear to fucking god. This isn’t fucking funny, Mark.” You shouted out your friends name, feeling your anxiety turn into anger.

Turning back around you stomped off, wishing more than anything you had told the arrogant asshole to fuck off. You wished you were at home, sat on the couch surrounded by junk food and playing some games. The thought of getting back and curling up with a controller kept your speed up.

Too lost in your thoughts to hear the footsteps running up behind you until the owner had slammed into you, immediately pinning you down to the forest floor. You let out a cry, the impact took your breath away. You felt twigs and rocks scrape against your exposed flesh, hands more than likely cut up.

You struggled under whoever was on top of you, unfortunately they seemed to have a height and weight advantage. More like they felt pretty strong, he held you down with one hand between your shoulder blades. His legs caging your hips in, you felt like the canary the cat had just finally caught.

“At least let me see who kills me.” You growled out, you wanted to see who it was so you could get some revenge in the afterlife, if there was one. A deep chuckle was heard above you. “Fi-ne, I’d prefer se-seeing the fear take over-er your face.” He seemed to stutter every now and then, you jumped feeling his hand tighten on your back and push you down. His hips suddenly jolting forward and grinding harshly against your ass, he also produced a loud noise that sounded like a twig snapping in half.

You couldn’t stop the gasp that left you, your face flushed and he flipped you onto your back. You looked up to see the wildest chestnut brown hair you had ever seen, he pulled his goggles back. They revealed the coldest brown eyes you’d ever seen, it was like they were completely devoid of light. He had deep purple bags under his eyes, almost as if he hadn’t slept in months. But that was impossible, he must barley sleep.

His skin was almost translucent, the moon that now had started raising above the skyline reflecting almost off his skin. You found yourself shaking underneath him, you didn’t really want to die. He tugged his mask down, his lips were tugged slightly downwards. You could see a slight stubble graving his chin from the angle you were at.

Your eyes ran down from his face to his body, he was covered by a khaki green jumper with striped arms and a blue hood. You noticed two blood stained hatchets at his hips, you gulped feeling your Adams apple bob.

His legs were covered by ripped up bloody grey jeans, threading sticking everywhere out of holes that almost looked like knife slashes. The only word that came to your mind after taking in the guy was that he was definitely a killer.

A sudden crack and his head being thrown to the side had you wide eye’d and staring at him. He smirked at you. “I have toure-ettes.” You just nodded then gulped, remembering the hatchets and blood. “Please, don’t kill me.” You couldn’t help the shaky way the words poured out, your heart felt like it was about to explode any moment.

He titled his head, his dead eyes appeared to take you in for a moment. You suddenly felt shyness fill you, turning your head away and attempting to curl in on yourself with little to no luck.

You curiously took another glance at his face only to catch his eyes, his face covered by a smirk. “How muh-much is your life wor-rth? What ar-re you wil-willing to do?” Despite the stuttering his smirk was still full of confidence, even something in his eye’s seemed to have changed.

You bit your lip, tugging on a peace of ragged skin. “Anything.” You spoke, if he wanted money you would give him every last penny you had. “How ab-bout you let me fuck y-you?” Your face flushed red, Toby letting out a chuckle, seemingly pleased with your reaction.

You looked at his eyes, not managing to hold the contact for long before your pupils quickly darted away. He wasn’t bad looking, rather he was pretty cute. “Okay.” He grinned, quickly leaning down to press his lips to yours. His lips were pretty chapped, you would even say extremely bitten.

You began moving against his lips, trying to follow his lead. Being gay wasn’t exactly new to you, but human contact sure was. He pulled away, his hands grabbing you up and pulling you into his chest. You flushed, he stood almost a head taller than you.

He pressed your lips back together, hands coming to land on your hips while yours grasped desperately to his jumper, hoping to ground yourself a little. His hands suddenly pulled away from you before returning and leaving a sting behind. The sound of a sudden smack had your lips opening, letting out a whine at the burn, giving Toby the opportunity to stick his tongue in your mouth, quickly exploring around.

You didn’t bother fighting him, instead submitting yourself to him by relaxing against him. He suddenly broke away. “I kne-ew you’d li-ike it.” His grin was almost wolfish. You felt heat build up in your abdomen, it felt like there were small pangs going off in your stomach.

Every time Toby’s fingers began to dip under your shirt and apply pressure to your hips your stomach would leap. Despite it being night and being outside you felt extremely warm, Toby’s body heat drew you in. He was unnaturally warm.

You couldn’t help but let out a moan every so often, it seemed like you had been kissing forever before he pulled back. Your mouth dropped a little to allow you to huff and pant, your hand coming to wipe the drool off your chin before Toby’s hand knocked it away.

Your eyebrows furrowed in question as you looked up at him, your hair a mess and cheeks covered in pink. Toby bit his lip, he never had a victim he had wanted to fuck before. He had the occasionally hook up with some random from a nightclub whenever Masky would drag him out, but he had never really found those people that attractive.

The sight currently in front of him had him harder then he had ever been in his life, his thoughts filling up with ways to take you, make you his. He felt almost feral, a part of him wanting to lock you away and keep you all to himself.

He ignored those thoughts, hands sliding up along with the smaller boys shirt and jumper until the boys chest was exposed. Toby grinned, licking his lips before attaching them to one of your nipples. You tried to jolt back but Toby’s hands stopped you, they wrapped around your biceps and he used his thumbs to keep your shirt and hoodie up.

You couldn’t stop the little gasps and moans that poured from your lips, jumping every time Toby would pull back only to swirl his tongue around the sensitive bud. After a few moments it began to feel like too much, letting out a small cry of overstimulation.

Toby laughed against your chest, keeping latched on for another few seconds before switching. You jumped and let out a gasp as the wind blew against your nipple, your eyes widening. You shook in Toby’s grasp while he gave the other nipple the same treatment, you nearly cried when he pulled away, the wind blowing against your already overstimulated nipples was almost too much.

He caught you off guard by pushing his fingers into your mouth, you let out a questioning moan around his fingers. You could feel the pads of his fingers rub gently against the back of your tongue, triggering your gag reflex. You would jolt and make a choking noise every time his fingers went too far down the back of your throat.

You tried your best to stay still and let him do whatever it was he was planning. His fingers suddenly left your lips, Toby took a second to take in the expression you wore. It was easy to see what he was doing to you, the drool that had dribbled down your chin while Toby had been finger fucking your mouth was definitely a pretty sight.

You’d look even prettier with Toby’s come all over that pretty face. Toby didn’t bother concealing the dark look that crossed his features. The boy had probably already seen his little friends blood covering him, he had no reason to hide anything now.

Toby’s hands ran back down (Names) hips, instead of stopping their they kept going until they disappeared under the band of (Names) jeans and underwear. Toby let out a groan, taking two handfuls of ass and squeezing which caused you to let out a small gasp, getting pushed closer against the taller boys chest.

You let out a squeak, the feeling of your shirt rubbing against your nipples was almost sore. Toby let out an airy sounding laugh, it chilled you. For some reason you felt as if you weren’t going to die, but you weren’t going to be seeing anyone anytime soon.

You couldn’t find it in you to care once you felt his finger start to rub circles around your hole, you dove further into his chest letting out wreaked sounding moans.

No one had ever touched you there before, it felt nothing like when you had tried it. Back then it had just felt awkward and you had wound up giving up. What had changed now? You turned to face the brunet, looking into those almost manic eyes that seemed to be completely different from the cold, closed off ones you had witnessed earlier.

Was it because this man could kill you? You bit your lip, the thought did excite you. The idea that he could easily snap your neck or something while balls deep in you had you letting out another moan, Toby took it as a signal that he could burry his finger into your hole.

Your face scrunched up and you let out a yelp, slight pain and discomfort filled you. He began circling his finger inside you, your body tensed as a foreign feeling began filling you. You wanted more, groaning you pushed back onto his digit.

Toby complied, almost too easily sliding in a second digit. Due to your saliva the fingers had little problem plunging into you, beginning to pick up speed. “A-ah!” You gasped out, seeing white as Toby’s finger grazed something deep inside of you. “Bi-ingo.” His voice seemed to deepen, his fingers speeding up and attacking your spot.

You threw your head back, back arching and stomach pressing flat against Toby’s. You suddenly didn’t mind, if he wanted you he could have you. If he took you back with him you didn’t think you’d put up a fight, not if he gave you this feeling.

It felt like something was beginning to build inside of your stomach, the familiar feeling of needing to come filled you. Yet you knew this was going to be the best one you had ever had, your hand not comparing in the slightest to what Toby was doing to your body.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your skull, mouth dropping open in a silent moan. Toby suddenly pulled his fingers out of you causing you to whine at the loss of contact. “Can-n’t get enou-ough huh?” He turned you around and pressed his cock between your cheeks, using his hands to spread your cheeks, the tip of his cock gliding over your hole.

The feeling of his tip catching against you had you moaning, you tried to grind your hips back but Toby’s hands prevented your movement. His finger’s were going to leave bruises, you couldn’t find it in you to care.

“God, please. I need more.” You begged, trying to push him inside. Toby grinned before tightening his grip on you, stopping you moving. You let out a broken sob, before getting cut off with the feeling of Toby’s cock stretching you. You threw your head back against his shoulder, your eyes drooping.

His cock was bigger than you had expected, it seemed to stuff you full. You swore you felt him hit your stomach once he was fully buried into you. All you could do was finish the moan that you had started.

You found your body relaxing back against him, his arms coming up to wrap around you. Holding you close to him, you gripped onto his arms for leverage as he started an almost brutal pace. The feeling of his cock almost disappearing out of you only to slam back deep into you was mind blowing.

You felt like you could go crazy from the feeling of him filling you up alone, never mind the feelings that swarmed you once his lips attached to your neck. He sucked big dark bruises into your flesh, he wanted everyone to see them.

His cock brushed against your g-spot and you shouted, probably alerting everyone in a ten mile radius but you couldn’t care. Toby easily manoeuvred you how he wanted, you felt like a ragdoll in his arms. Your brain couldn’t keep up, your thoughts melted away and all you could do was call out Toby’s name and moan.

You could feel yourself getting close, it felt like a tsunami was approaching and all you could do was hang limp against Toby. “I-I’m gonna.” You cut yourself off with a loud moan, your loading shooting out. You fell back, boneless against Toby, thankful for his strength because you didn’t think you could stand.

The feeling of you tightening around Toby’s cock had him coming deep inside of you, you let out a weak groan at the feeling of his come coating your insides. “Mine.” He muttered, his words serious and laced with possessiveness. You nodded against him, feeling your eyelids start to close.

#ticci toby #ticci toby x reader #creepypasta #creepypasta x reader #ticci toby x male!reader #creepypasta x male!reader

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littlerockerao3 · 3 years

Note

Ooh 73 for the drabble thing if you want :)

Of course! Here it is!

73. “Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?”

Trigger warning: nudity, but I guess that was obvious.

~~~~

Robb hates Summer. He hates that he constantly has to take a shower only to still be sweating three seconds later. He hates how ice cream melts in a heartbeat and it all drips along the cone and straight in his hand. He hates how he has to sleep with the window open just to let some breeze in the room but then, in the morning, the sunshine so bright and hot either wakes him up too early or ends up burning some part of his body: it happened once that he fell asleep and this ray of sunshine burnt half of his arm.

Now, as if all of this wasn’t enough, it’s fucking July and no month is hotter than July. If it was up to Robb, he’d stay home with his face in front of the fan for hours and hours. But it just so happens that he has a boyfriend who claims to see him every once in a while, but since his boyfriend is a total dickhead who loves Summer more than anything else in the world (Robb is one hundred per cent sure that is solely because he can show off his biceps) and there’s no fucking fan at his place.

That had led Robb to the only solution to survive such hot weather: lowering the blinds, undressing and lying on the bed. It does work, for a little: the pillow is cool, but he’ll have to turn it on the other side in a few, cause he feels his hair is sweating so hard it’s basically wet. But for now, it’s a nice feeling: Theon’s place is comfortable in the first place. More quiet. Cooler, cause Theon’s the only one living in here, Robb’s home is so full of people stuck with each other he’s sure that’s the reason why it’s so warm. He wishes he could live at Theon’s place forever, which is something that could actually happen at some point, cause Theon is trying to send him signals about it for days. Robb’s not even sure if Theon himself is sure of it, he just wishes he could say it as it is: “move in with me”. It’s not like Robb would refuse.

“Babe, you in there?” He hears Theon’s voice coming from the other side of the door. He’s early, he said he had to go to the store and grab a few things and that it would have taken him only five minutes, which equals two twenty-five minutes when it’s about Theon.

The door opens, “Ro-is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?”

Robb rolls his eyes, as he turns lightly to stare at his boyfriend’s amused face, “Now don’t act like you don’t like it”.

A smirk appears on Theon’s face, thick dark eyebrows raising. He makes his way to the bed, flip flops swatting against the floor, and lays down next to Robb, “Oh I do like it indeed”.

He swats a hand down on Robb’s ass, much like he was expecting, which is the only reason Robb doesn’t wince.

“Ouch” he still says, out of instinct. In response, Theon pats his bum one more time, gentler, then rests his hand on Robb’s lower back. “Oh we both now you can handle much more than that”.

It’s true, Robb can’t deny that, but he’s too tired to replay: warm weather makes his head hurt and Theon’s hand is so warm it makes him sweat even more. He realises he’d been keeping his eyes closed only when he opens them up the moment he feels Theon’s lips pressing a kiss to his neck.

“What is wrong, sexy?”

Robb sighs in return, “My brain, my whole body is boiling. It’s too hot” he whines.

“N’aaaw, my poor little abominable snowman doesn’t like Summer, does he?” Theon brushes his nose against Robb’s cheek, then proceeds to kiss his jaw.

“I freaking ha-what did you just call me?” Robb would like to ask Theon where he got the idea for that nickname, but it’s in that moment that Theon climbs on top of him, his skin touching Robb’s. Which translates into: more sweating.

“No don’t do that, it’s too hot for you to touch me” he cries, pushing Theon away. Though Theon is only wearing shorts and a white t-shirt Robb wonders how he doesn’t need to take a shower cause, for fuck’s sake, Robb just took a shower, he’s completely naked yet he does need another shower.

“Seriously, and then you make fun of me when it’s winter and I’m too cold” Theon huffs, feigning annoyance.

Robb bends his head a little to press a small weak kiss to his shoulder, “How do you handle summer without melting or frying?” He asks it as if he’s looking for the elixir of life.

Theon twists his finger along one of Robb’s auburn curls, “I swim a lot”, he says, “In fact, we should go swim, right now and cool off”.

“In your pool?” Robb doesn’t know why he’s asking, of course he meant his pool: that was like, number one reason why Theon bought this house in the first place, cause it had enough space for a pool.

“Yep” Theon says.

“But I’ll get sunburned” Robb whines, grabbing his boyfriend’s hand and caressing his long fingers with his own.

“Not if you put on sunscreen”.

“But I don’t have it here with me, and you’re a dickhead who doesn’t get sunburned because your skin tone is fucking amazing and you actually can sunbathe” Robb’s aware he sounds like a kid, but he doesn’t mind: he’s allowed to, sometimes. And it’s true, Theon does have an amazing skin tone and he’s a dickhead for that.

“I actually do have some sunscreen here” that statement causes Robb to frown in both confusion and surprise: Theon despises sunscreen, and he’s gonna regret that in a few years, but every time they go to the beach (not many times but still) and Robb tells him to put on some at least on his face, the answer he usually gets is a simple “fuck off”. That is why it’s so weird for Robb to know Theon has let some sunscreen in his home.

“You do?” he asks.

Theon rolls his eyes, a small blush making its way through his bony cheeks, “Yeah, just for you babe”.

The smile grows on Robb’s face without him trying to control it, “How thoughtful of you”.

Theon takes that as the opportunity to hide his blush behind a charming smirk, “I know right? I think I deserve a kiss”.

“More than one” Robb leans over so that his lips can touch Theon’s. He feels hands caressing his hips and lower back, til they make their way down to his ass. This time, when Theon pinches it, Robb does wince. “Ow! Stop it!” He exclaims, swatting Theon’s hands away.

Theon’s smile is just a few inches away from Robb’s mouth.

“Never” he says, then pulls him in for another kiss.

It’s Theon who pulls away first, this time: he gets up from the bed and slips inside his flip flops to grab the bottle of sunscreen from his drawer. It’s still wrapped in plastic.

“You know, I think you should stay naked” he says to Robb.

“Don’t you start” the redhead says in return: he knows that will only lead to Theon’s grabby hands not trying at all to control themselves.

“It’s not like anyone is going to see us anyway” Theons says, as he gets undressed too, only to slip inside a pair of red swim trunks, “Come on.”

Robb doesn’t know why he agrees on swimming naked while Theon is not going to be naked. Probably because he already knows those red trunks aren’t going to stay on for too long anyway. Oh well. He’s lucky enough the bush all around the house is high and no one is going to see his naked body, unless they’ll look out the top floors’ windows.

Theon’s grabby hand don’t waste time and show Robb how grabby they are right away, by applying much more sunscreen than necessary on his glutes and lower belly. Robb actually has to ask Theon to focus a little more on his shoulders and back, cause he’s been outside under the sun for five minutes and they’re burning already.

“There you go, now there’s no way you’re going to get sunburned, this is the sunscreen that’s usually used on little kids” Theon rubs the sunscreen over Robb’s cheeks and nose at last.

Robb eyes him up and down: his golden anklet is basically shining thanks to the contrast with his bronze skin, his brown eyes looks so warm. He’s just too gorgeous.

“I hate you, you have such a beautiful skin tone” he huffs.

Theon extends a hands to gently stroke Robb’s collarbone, “Mhm-hmm, I don’t have these lovely freckles though. Come on, let’s go”.

He jumps in the pool with a loud splash, drops of water lading all over Robb’s naked body. He better get going as well.

“Oh god this feels good” he almost moans, as he gets into the cold water of the pool.

“Told ya” Theon’s all over him in a second, hands on his waist, pressing him against the edge.

“Shut up”

“Make me”

Robb gladly starts that little make out session that ends with him pushing Theon away before it can turn into more than just a make out session. And that’s how Robb keeps swimming around while Theon sits on the pink flamingo float, saying that he should probably go inside and make them some drinks to drink by the pool, but still refusing to make a move.

“God, I wish I had a pool at my place, I’d swim in there every day” Robb says at some point, cause man Theon was right, swimming really does help you when it’s too hot.

Theon shrugs in response, “It wouldn’t be as relaxing, with all your siblings playing around” he claims, as a matter of fact. As he should, since he’s right.

“Goddamn you’re right” Robb runs a hand through his face: he loves his little siblings, but he’s getting older and he needs his own privacy, right now more than ever. He needs his own place.

It takes Theon a few bites of the inside of his cheek before he manages to talk again, “You can come here anytime you want, you know. Even every day is fine.”

There, these are the kinds of “signals” Robb was talking about: Theon telling him he can come over everyday, Theon telling him he knows were to go if he doesn’t feel like staying at home with all that chaos for one night. He never says it explicitly though.

Today might be the day. If Robb pushes him enough.

“Oh yeah?” he says, feigning curiosity, “What about when you’re at work?”

Theon shrugs, “You do have a spare key”.

“That’s supposed to be for emergency only”.

Theon huffs, “You were literally lying half dead, ass in the air, in my bed because of the weather, that does look like an emergency”.

He’s not looking at him in the eyes, which always happens when he’s the one about to make an important decision or, in this case, offer, that involves both of them as a couple.

“And then... you know, it was good to come back home and find you there.” He’s blushing, “Even if I left for just five minutes, it’s... I like the thought of coming home and find you here. So, you can come here whenever you want”.

Robb finds himself smiling, as he approaches the big flamingo floats and crosses his arms on it.

“Is there anything you want to tell me?”

Theon’s blush deepens, and he tries to hide it by rolling his eyes, “Well, yes there is something but...”

He doesn’t go on. Robb taps his knee, comfortingly.

“I’m listening”

Theon takes a deep, long huff. Runs both his hand through his hair and face. “God, I can’t believe I’m about to do this”.

He’s chuckling nervously, that’s another thing he does when he’s about to take a huge step in his, or their, life.

“Take your time”, Robb squeezes his knee.

“If you already figured that out then you could just give me an answer already”, that makes him laugh, but Robb definitely does not give in so easily.

“I want to hear you say it”, he claims, smiling at him as he’s taking the umpteenth deep breath.

“Okay, damn.” Theon finally looks at him in the eye. And then he says it, “Robb, do you want to move in with me?”

“Yes!”

Robb practically jumps on him as he’s screaming his answer, the pink flamingo flips upside down and their both underwater, Robb’s arms and legs wrapped around Theon. They’re both laughing when they make their way to the surface, Theon actually looks so happy he could cry.

They stop laughing only cause they both decide they should use their mouths to do something else, cause their previous make out session was probably a little too short.

And suddenly, even the pool it’s too hot for Robb, and for Theon too, most likely. But Robb doesn’t care, soon the sun will go down and the air will be a little cooler. And no one’s going to see them as they get it on in the soon-to-be-theirs-and-not-only-just-Theon’s pool.

Maybe Summer is not so bad.

#throbb #theon x robb #throbb fic #throbb one shot #I don’t remember how I tagged the previous one oh well #anon #hope you like it and thanks for the prompt!😘

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the-silentium · 3 years

Text

A story of having each others back

Masterlist - A story of shirts

Pairing: Crosshair x Reader, Bad Batch x Reader

Words: 2754 words

Warnings: None.

A/N: There is some teeny tiny spoiler without context of the next Murphy day saga: Good Night, Good Luck. You guys can speculate on the meanings!

Taglist: @haloangel391

The fog was so thick he couldn't see where the ramp of the ship finished and where the grass started, even from his vantage point from the top of said ramp. He lingered in the entrance of the ship, shoulder leaning on the frame, a leg crossed over the other. The humidity was refreshing on his face, calming his overworking mind, washing away the worries of the war, the dread of the loss, and the uncertainty of tomorrow.

It was calm for once, there was no one around to push him playfully hard into a wall or assault his ears with some unneeded tsunami of information or make him feel like a kid under the careful eye of an adult. He was finally able to release the tension building in his muscles and relax, enjoy some me-time while it lasted.

Or so he thought.

"Cross, I'm cold." Your melodious whine alerted him of your presence, mere seconds before delicate fingers slipped under the hem of his blacks to toy with the fabric, your knuckles creating a trail of fire where it grazed the skin.

The fire of your touch burned his insecurities, hushed the whispers of his demons, and most of all, melted the thick walls shielding his heart. He made them indestructible. You made them malleable.

He chuckled at your antics, the time when he was surprised that a strong warrior like you could become such a cuddly and adorable woman whenever the ambient temperature was not hotter than your body was long gone. He'd noticed pretty quickly that you had a really low tolerance to lower temperature.

He'd done nothing at first, merely watched you shiver from time to time, enduring your predicament without saying a word. He saw you pass your hands over yours arms more than once, but all he could do was weigh the pros and cons of helping you out of your misery.

Because if he did, he'd let it know that he cared. And Crosshair didn't care. Not for anyone other than his brothers. They were family. They were loyal. They were everything.

But you were special. Caring. True. Sassy. Loyal. You were the newest member of this freak family and you deserved to be helped if only to pay you back from everything you did for them. For him.

So he'd decided that he would cover you in all the warmth he could offer.

More fingers slipped under the hem, tentatively lifting the fabric over his abdomen, intensifying the fire with the full-on skin contact. He could almost feel your body inches away from his back, close but not enough in his books.

"Think you can have this?" He chuckled as he got back on his two feet to turn around and meet your sheepish gaze. He had to suppress a shiver at the softness of your fingers moving over his middle and lower back as he turned over.

"Please Crosshair." You begged with a dangerous fake pout, bottom lip poking out slightly.

He wouldn't admit it, but he liked it when you begged. Not that you did that often. In fact, he only heard you beg once in the year you passed at their side. Needless to say that the situation was far from the one at hand, but it wrapped up his heart with the very same warmth.

"Your wish is my command." His finger reached for the wood stick from between his lips, threw it away into the depth of the fog to swiftly remove his top, exposing his skin to the chilly air. At the sudden change, goosebumps appeared on his arms, but he didn't care. He didn't feel them.

All he could do was admire the joy in your eyes and the excitement as you pulled the oversized shirt on, the extra length hiding not only your black shirt but the hem of your exquisitely short shorts too.

"Thanks." You smiled brightly, eyes solely focussed on him.

Even upside down, dangling meters in the air and prey to a carnivorous plant, Crosshair knew that you were a beautiful woman and that your beauty wouldn't lessen even covered in mud from head to toe. That smile was too damn captivating. It was too damn bright.

In the same chain of thought, nothing could be added to you and make you more beautiful. You were already perfection. But seeing you in his shirt turned everything upside down.

He'd been wrong for so long and on so many things.

All of his dark thoughts and low expectations caused him to repress his feelings, leaving you to think that he saw you as distracting and insignificant.

Leaving you to give him space because you thought he wanted it when all he really wanted was for you to be part of his bubble. Leaving the path open for his brother to get involved with you without saying anything. It was slow, a pace that suited the both of you, but was way too fast for him to come to terms with his own feelings.

"But Hunter's not here." Your cool hands found his naked waist, thumbs discovering the scars there with an utterly careful touch. He dropped the fact that you seemed to read his mind, focussing on the only thing he could think of.

"You look like a goddess in that." He groaned, head lowering to the perfect column of your throat.

He inhaled your enrapturing smell, his eyes closing to lose himself in the moment.

"And you're so handsome without it." You whispered as shakily as your fingers on his sides.

He decided to allow himself this one time of carelessness. Before everything came crashing down.

Your hands gripped his sides tighter as he nibbled at the skin, triggering a memory of your arms tightly enveloping him in their secure embrace. Of a time when he could feel the warmth of your own soul through the cage, calling out to his, but this time there was no fear. Only care.

"I've got you Cross." Your voice echoed through his mind, distant, words from a distant memory. "I've got you."

"I've got you." He whispered against your sensitive skin, repeating the words that rang through his mind every time his gaze found yours.

His lips moved up your jaw to meet yours and as always, the contact was tasteless, devoid of any spark that he couldn't possibly create in the abyss of his mind. But he would take it if it meant that he could maintain the dream going. If for once he wasn't second. If he wasn't the one who took too long into accepting his feelings.

But he was. And the truth slapped him hard in the face when you bit his bottom lip, jolting his mind out of his dream and into the harsh world where the first rays of the sun illuminated your empty makeshift bed.

Immediately, Crosshair shot up, eyes scanning around until he noticed your body pressed to Hunter's, one of your hands gripping tightly around his shirt as if we would disappear.

Betrayal flooded his veins and he hated the feeling as much as he hated himself at this moment. He didn't have any reason to hold this against you. You never led him on, only complying to his silence when he'd ignore you and not force your company on him.

He wasn't even sure you were aware of his feelings until the night prior when the realization hit you like a speeder after his jealousy finally pierced his walls and controlled his judgment, forcing you in a bad position between him and his brother. He felt bad for tricking you of the sort, but he could never regret it. Finally, he saw you wearing something of his. It was one of his biggest achievement if he was honest. And most satisfying one for sure.

He got up, unable to watch any longer. As he passed, a whisper escaped your lips, your eyes were still closed, hand clutching tighter around the fabric prisoner of your grip.

"I've got you Cross." Your face scrunched up in discomfort pulling at his heartstrings.

He walked away despite his body aching to wake you up, to comfort you that he was still there and assure you that they were not.

________________

He was childish, he knew it, but his heart squeezed every time his eyes met yours. He avoided you as much as possible, not that it was difficult since you were stuck in your pilot seat, deeply concentrated on landing in a warzone deep into enemy territory and he was with the others, verifying their equipment one last time before the action began.

"Don't act like a kicked puppy. You made this." Crosshair rolled his eyes beneath his helmet, not moving an inch at Hunter's remark in the private line. "She likes you too, idiot. For a sniper you're unbelievably blind."

"Get your head in the game." He grumbled under his breath as you started your countdown until your quick landing.

He didn't want to acknowledge his sergeant's comment, but he deeply hoped that he was right. After all, the grey-haired clone had been wrong about you before. One last time wouldn't hurt.

_______________

While offering cover fire to his brothers, Crosshair decided that he'd stop being an ass and talk to you. His life didn't allow him the luxury to be dithering. He had to clear up everything and to do so, he needed to corner you alone. He thought it would have been easy, you tried to talk to him all day so all he had to do was wait for you to come to him. But it didn't happen.

After sending the ship into hyperspace, you fussed over the injuries on Wrecker's arms all the while berating him for being so reckless, forced Tech to drop his work on the new prototype that needed adjustments to force him to get some rest, and finally, you cleaned up after the mess they created at the back of the ship.

He watched you move around, picking up abandoned backpacks, open medkits, and bloody gauzes, his determination deflating with each passing second.

Before he knew it, you returned hastily to the cockpit to jump out of hyperspace and make your way to the republican planet.

You'd learned so quickly how to maneuver the ship, he sometimes forgot that you joined their team only a year ago. Although he did remember clearly the time when you weren't around; when the same routine would play over and over again without failing like a very boring record. You'd broken that record without a problem, adding your touch here and there, keeping them organized, making sure that they got their well-needed rest, reducing the tension with your harmless pranks and stupid jokes. He always loved his silence, but he'd never return to a time where you weren't there.

"You should go sleep." You mumbled, stretching until your bones popped. It was only then that he noticed how tired you seemed.

His hand shot out to your wrist when you made your way to the fresher.

"You're having nightmares again."

"No." You frowned on the defensive, pulling your hand out of his wrist, hurting his feelings by doing so.

As his teeth gnashed together, he was glad he didn't have a toothpick between them as usual. It would definitely have broken under the pressure.

"Bad liar." He turned around, knowing that if you weren't able to trust him with your nightmares, then there was no way what Hunter told him was true.

He himself wasn't the one so blinded with love that he started seeing it everywhere. He wasn't the one with whom you'd share your secrets or the one who knew the taste of your lips or the one to get to see you parade in his shirts before bed or the one to get to sleep next-

Too engrossed in his spiraling thoughts, Crosshair didn't think when his shirt got pulled. His hand moved on its own, too used to deal with Wrecker's annoying habit of trying to lift him by the back of his blacks. With a sharp slap, Crosshair successfully removed the hand gripping his shirt.

Before he even heard your yelp of pain, his brain made the connection. He turned around, eyes wide in surprise at his own attack, remorse flooding his chest.

He saw the pain in your eyes as well as the tears gathering in them. With your hands to your chest, you backed away in the fresher and locked the door before he even found his voice to apologize.

A lump formed in his throat, still not entirely comprehending what had happened, how he could have possibly let his jealousy blind him.

Again.

With tight fists at his sides, Crosshair made his way to the only place he could go. To bed. He made a quick job of climbing to the bunk over his sergeant's, making sure to repress his urges to accidently kick him in the sides and laid there over the covers, eying the ceiling, fists opening and closing around nothing.

He wanted to yell, kick, punch, shoot, get it out of his system, but all he could do was staying still, muscles stiff enough to hurt.

It took a while, but you walked out of the fresher, your light footsteps making their way to the barracks. He almost assumed you'd push Hunter over and cuddle close to him for security and comfort. He didn't anticipate at all the pull on his sheets.

Just to be sure that he wasn't hallucinating, he waited until you did it again before leaning over the edge. He couldn't see your eyes in the almost complete darkness, but he knew you could see him clearly.

"I hear them in my dreams." You paused, head moving towards the door. "And sometimes I can still see the Algax around the corners." He couldn't see you shiver, but the wave in your voice was clear enough. You were scared.

"Jump up." He didn't lose a second to move aside to make you some room.

He pulled the covers aside before you fully laid down on the mattress, enveloping your body in its safe embrace as soon as you stayed still on your side.

He hated the fact that he couldn't see your face and read your emotions. Or that he couldn't erase their memory of your mind. The silence grew longer and longer until finally, he had enough.

"I'm sorry for hurting you. It wasn't- I never-" He grunted in exasperation when words failed him.

"I'll forgive you if you hold me." He didn't lose a second at your weak voice, slipping under the cover to pull you close into his chest.

"I've got you." He kissed the top of your head as your body started shivering, from fear or cold, he wasn't sure. Probably both.

He gripped your waist and carefully flipped you around to switch places, putting your back to the wall instead of the black void, hoping that it would give you some reassurance. Instead, you merely hid in his chest.

His fingers combed through your hair, waiting patiently for you to either fall asleep or say something.

"Thank you." He almost missed it, the words muffled by his clothed chest.

"No need to."

"I do. You didn't have to." Your face separated from his torso, to peer at his eyes.

He felt your hand moving from around his waist to make its way up, towards your face. His breath caught in his throat at the contact of your fingers barely touching his cheek, the very first loving contact you blessed him with.

"I wanted to." He whispered back, hopeful that you'd get his intention so he didn't have to voice them.

"I'm glad." Your chilly palm rested fully on his cheek, relaxing his muscles despite accelerating his heartbeat. "On our next leave maybe we can go hang out together? Just the two of us?" You silently offered.

"I'd like that."

Biggest understatement of the millennia. He was delighted that you'd caught on his unsaid feelings and offered him some time alone with you.

As soon as your hand left his cheek he felt cold, already missing your touch.

"Goodnight Cross." Your hot breath passed through his blacks to tickle the skin beneath. You moved your arms back to your chest, forehead on his sternum.

He waited for a second, savoring the feeling of your real body cuddled against him. It felt even better than he imagined.

"Night."

He made sure to fall asleep after you, waiting until your breathing evened out before even thinking of drifting off. One last time he stroked your cheek, his movement as delicate as he could to not wake you up.

He let himself relax, a hit of a smile stretching his lips at the thought of going on a date with you sooner rather than later.

Maybe being second wasn't all that bad.

#bad batch x reader #crosshair x reader #hunter x reader #sergeant hunter #clone force 99 #clone wars #star wars #jealousy is in the air #but with a happy ending

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7soulstars · 3 years

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*kneeling dramatically in front of your throne* greetings my queen Hri! i hope you're doing well and taking good care of yourself 💕 i just read your johnny depp hcs and it's perfect .. i have sufferd from eating disorders for years and i know you got everything right, angel.. thank you so much for being so kind and supportive to all of us😻✨

as you know i've been thristing over legolas lately 🙊 so i thought of requesting something cute with him, if you don't mind writing it ofcourse, maybe he and y/n got lost in the woods and y/n is freaking out cause it's like her biggest fear actually happening but legolas so chill and is secretly happy cause it means he gets to spend more time with her, you can take it from here or develop it however you like 💕✨ thank you again love 😻

You sopil me soo much! Ugh I love it ! I’m glad you liked the hc I was really scared that I may have hurt someone or may have triggered them ! I hope your all better now and I know how much strength it takes to take a disorder down,,,,, Also I live for this Legolas fic req because we all know how much of a cheeky little shit he is! So lets go!!

Taur-o Thilivern Lie

Characters: Legolas x Reader

Warnings: Arachnophobia?, mention of blood,Sugar Rush Inducing Fluff that makes our local elf dad want to puke

Summary: Legolas and Y/N get lost in the woods one is praying for time to go faster, the other to go slow....

.............

Taur-o Thilivern Lie ; Elvish for The Woods of White Lies

“Legolas.....”

“Y/N.....”

“We are lost aren’t we ?”

“.........Yes........”

The duo stood there in silence,only the cawing of a raven echoing in the background as the elven prince watched the woman turn stiff as a board. Not even a second later Y/N started walking in circles before stopping infront of the prince and looked him straight in the eye. “D-Don’t worry Legolas I’ll get us out of here”, she said puffing her chest as the her voice betrayed her actions.

Legolas did not say much he just nodded and walked behind Y/N who was stopping every two minutes of their walk. Well at least not until they reached a very dark and damp part of the forest.

“Oh must be where the huge spider lives”,Legolas unconciously let the words slip his mouth.

“SPIDERS !?”

“Yes-”, his words were cut off as Y/N bolted across the trees screaming with no heed to the direction she was going in.

“Y/N !”, Legolas yelled as he ran behind her a layer of raw worry painting across himself “Y/N stop you are going to hurt yourself !”, he yelled as that’s exactly what happened.

The ground beneath Y/N’s feet sloped and she toppled rolling down a small heap. The ellon ran towards her as he reached out for her arm but ended up getting pulled into a hug.

Y/N’s face was buried into his chest as he froze. Her shoulders were shaking and his tunic felt wetter by every second. If this was a different scenario then Legolas would have died blushing but currently he was too concerned.

“Y/N ? Y/N are you crying? Valar did I do something ! I’m-”

“You idiot !”, she cried bringing herself to face him. Her face covered with tears and snot which everyone else would have taught was disgusting but not to Legolas. "I thought we're going to die! I like you so much I don' wanna die so soon! I'm scared of spiders", she wailed incoherenty, bringing her head back into his chest unaware of the words that left her mouth in the panic.

Legolas wouldn't lie, he was enjoying the feeling of the girl in buried into his chest way and her words too much, as he wrapped his arms around her as he lightly scolding her, " That is why you must stick close to me Y/N! This forest is full of dangers and you are not well aware of that yet ! "

It was true. Y/N had never been to the forest. It had been new to her and now she is clinging into the the tunic of the Prince of Elves. "I'm sorry..... ", she whined, her voice muffling into his chest. Her head still buried into his chest, the prince decided to say, " Oh Valar! A spider! " to which the girl let out a ear piercing screech as she tried running out of his arms, her eyes still closed. "LEGOLAS!!"

He let out a loud laugh as he grabbed her waist and kept her in position, from running away. Her back was now rested on his chest, her head under his chin as he coaxed her to open her eyes. "Hey shh shhh, I was joking okay, open your eyes! Look! ...", and she did did as he said.

There lay a beautiful clearing in front of them, blue and orange flowers littered everywhere as the now setting sun shone upon them giving them a beautiful hue. Y/N's tears had dried replaced by the smile on her face as she sighed happily at the scene playing in front of her. "It's so beautiful..... ". Legolas looked at her, he had forgotten about the flowers "Cin are limb more" (You are much more)he mumbled. His words not reaching her ears.

Neither of them knew how much time passed by as the two sat on the grassy patch unaware of their seating position until Y/N snapped out of the trance standing up abruptly, her face flustered. "W-we should try finding our way back! It's getting darker." Legolas didn't notice his face twist. He looked like a kicked puppy whose owner wouldn't give him pats well , at least until there was a rustle from the bushes nearby. He got up in one swift motion pulling Y/N behind him and his bow and arrow in his hand, waiting for whatever was in the bushes to come out.

Rustle!

"Prince Legolas and Lady Y/N?"

"Haldir!?", the two looked at the march warden in disbelief.

"Haldir!" Y/N ran towards him and held his hand. "Thank god you're here we got lost!"

"Lost ?", the marchwarden questioned his eyebrow lifting as he glanced at the prince behind the lady who had patted his index finger on his own lip.

The horses galloped back to the palace Legolas sported an idiotic smile on his face and a very tired and asleep Y/N leaned on his chest as they rode along with Haldir.

"Since when does the prince who spent almost every day of his childhood in those woods get lost? ", Haldir asked playfully.

"Hollen or-" (shut up) mumbled the other. Still unable to wipe the grin off his face "I got confused.... ", he reasoned.

"Whatever you say..... ", Haldir chucked. " Well, it isn't called Taur-o Thilivern Lie for nothing ", he countinued.

"Indeed... ", Legit said in a good mood, for now he was sure he really wanted you...

--The End--

Me: *gets ready to be hit with Tomatoes*

Hey guys! I'm finally done with this blurb! It was for my babies @gorgeourrific-nerd and all of you! It's not my best work and Ik it's short but I really hope you like it! I worked hard for it! Please do keep sending in requests! It may take a while but I'll definitely do it! Feedback would be appreciated! I hope you like, comment and reblog my fics if you like them to support me! Please do not plagiarize my work I really work hard for it🥺.I love you guys!🥰🥰

~Love Hri

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