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#fluffy angsty smut
0nlythrowharrybeaux · 1 month
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A Surprise^**
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Hello friends, thank you so much for your patience. I ended up having quite a disastrous day and it took longer to finish editing! But here is the one shot based off of this request. Hope you like it!
Warnings: TW! abusive partner: mentions of love-bombing, gaslighting/accusations of infidelity, verbal arguments, intimidation tactics (psychological and physical), physical altercation between M/F ( described, but more intimidating than violent or aimed to hurt), physical altercation between M/M (not described but the aftermath is mentioned, bloody nosy type of thing), mentions of law enforcement and law enforcement processes. Mentions of sex, unprotected sex, oral (M/F receiving), fingering, unplanned pregnancy, ultrasound procedure.
WC: 18.2K
You were nervous as you rode up in the elevator. You weren’t claustrophobic or anything, so the feeling of it closing in on you was one you had no idea how to deal with. You were trying to keep your breathing as calm as possible and clearing your head of any irrational or negative thoughts, but it was truly a challenge. It had been a nearly a year since you and Harry had been in any space together and it was nerve-racking. What was originally supposed to be a month or two-long break, turned into all this time and distance. He said he wanted to talk and get some closure, which you thought was bull shit, and that’s why you were so nervous.
Before “the break” you and Harry had been dating for four years. Things had been going really well up until he started getting antsy to work again. You’d moved to London for him and now that he was finally “off” you saw that he was jumping into the next thing he could. You understood that he felt like he needed to do something with his time but soon enough he was back in the studio for hours at a time while you just hung out at his house. You lasted a year like that before you told him that you couldn’t do it anymore. You felt lonely in your relationship with him and you saw that he wasn’t ready to slow down and settle a bit like he said he was before. That was the whole reason why you’d even moved to London for him. So when you suggested a little time apart to have him sort through his priorities he freaked out on you. But the following morning the tune was different, he was more open to this idea of taking some time apart.
You had assured him over and over again that you loved him but that you were ready for the next step and he clearly wasn’t. He then assured you that you were the love of his life and that he’d take a month or two to just tie up all the loose strings with his current project and then focus back on your relationship. You even went back home to LA to give him all the space he needed. You checked in with each other a lot but when the two months were up you reached out and didn’t get a response back until two weeks later. Much to your dismay it was just an “I’m sorry.” And with tears in your eyes you just deleted the entire messaging feed you had with him.
A few months later you were back on the dating scene. One of your co-workers set you up with her cousin, Steven. He came off as sweet, smart, and mature. He mostly had his shit together from what she’d said and you had seen, so you gave him a real chance. Yeah, he was no Harry, but no one would ever equate to Harry, so you stopped comparing and got to know him for who he was. Soon enough you’d started to develop more feelings for Steven, he showered you in attention and time and affection, it was almost too much, you thought. But then you recalled that things had been so cold with Harry towards the end that maybe you just weren’t used it anymore. It wasn’t love-bombing, it was just a man who is interested in showing you what you meant to him. After two months of seeing him casually you started talking about the future, about starting a real, committed relationship. You talked about properly meeting each other’s families and taking serious steps forward, you were gearing up to properly move on with someone who clearly prioritized you! And then Harry called. 
He was jealous, you heard it in his voice when he called, but the fact that he was jealous pleased you in a way. Honestly, you thought you’d be so well off that when you spoke to him you’d feel above him somehow, but when you heard his voice your heart ached with longing and your small victory suddenly made you feel a bit sadistic. He then asked to see you to get some closure and you quickly agreed because you needed it too. But that’s how you ended up at his hotel just an hour later. So far you were just standing there at his hotel door just taking each other in. Quite frankly, you were just pleased you had made it out of the elevator alive. But it felt like it’d been ages and no time at all at the same time, your heart was racing in the confines of your chest, making it hard to breathe once again. It made you so happy, but hurt your heart at the same time to see him. It was so confusing, feeling relief and joy and disappointment all at the same time. 
“You look great.” He complimented you after a few moments of staring.
“Oh! Thanks.” You smiled timidly, “H-how are you?”
“I’m alright. Come on in.” He said moving aside and you wandered in. You sat at the couch in his suite as he headed to the kitchenette.
“Can I offer you some water or tea?” He asked.
“No, I’m alright.” You assured and he nodded before coming over to sit near you on the couch. You sat in silence for a few moments again before he chuckled in slight disbelief and shook his head.
“I can’t believe you’re actually here.” He confessed with a shake of his head.
“Me either.” You chuckled a bit humorlessly. He had wronged you…the only thing that you knew about him right now was that he did not love you as much as he said he did. If he did he wouldn’t have left you hanging like he had. “I guess I just…needed to see you one more time. I don’t think that we left off on a good note so-”
“Exactly. That’s why I wanted to see you.” He said leaning forward and taking your hand and your facade of stoicism and ease melted away immediately. The hurt from his actions just came to the surface and made a pang of pain ripple from your chest all the way out to your fingertips, you swore even your scalp hurt as his eyes met yours apologetically.
“Harry, it’s almost been a year.” You pointed out and he frowned.
“I know, love.” He confirmed, “And I haven’t even tried t-to apologize since that text I sent you.” He said and your eyes started welling up. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I just…I got scared that if I took that step forward with you it meant that my work was gone.” He explained and you scoffed.
“Harry, no! When I asked you to slow down that’s all I meant. Slow down, not stop! I’d never tell you to stop.” You sighed, exasperated and upset that he even thought that you’d ever make him stop doing what he loved most, “I just wanted you to slow down a little and enjoy your life for yourself. Spend time with your mom and your sister and your cousins and nieces and nephews!” You vented, “W-with me.” You added towards the end and he nodded in understanding. “What you do with your work matters to me. I see how happy it makes you. And I don’t think I’ve ever done anything to make you feel like you couldn’t be honest with me about your priorities.” You said and he shook his head.
“You didn’t. I should’ve talked to you about it all, Y/N. I know I fucked up, big time, but I love you and-”
“No you don’t…” you interrupted with a scoff as you pulled your hand away from his, “You’re just jealous because I’m ready to move on with someone else now.” You said to him and he glanced up at the ceiling and smiled sadly.
“Yeah, of course I’m fucking jealous!” he confessed through a pained, breathy laugh, “And I still love you and whether you believe it or not because of my previous actions, I respect you and you deserve an apology. That’s why I wanted to see you.” He explained as his eyes met yours again, “I know that I’ve lost you, Y/N.” He said sadly, “Believe me, I didn’t come to try and talk you out of that decision. I just wanted to tell you, in person, that I love you with my whole heart. I should’ve fought for you. You showed me so much love and gave me all of your care and support all the time! I shouldn’t have been scared t-to talk about it. I shouldn’t have let you go.” He explained, “I’m going to have to live with that for the rest of my life, Y/N. I know that.” He sniffled and you wiped your tears carefully. “I just needed you to know that it’s not anything you did. I love you, even still, I think I’ll die loving you.” He said.
“Jesus, Harry…” you inhaled sharply before standing up quickly. You grabbed your purse from the coffee table and started rushing back to the door.
“Baby! Baby, baby, baby-” he rushed in front of you blocking the door, “J-just wait.” He sniffled, he looked panicked.
“Why should I?” You questioned him, “Why now?” You asked for clarity and he swallowed thickly, “You had this whole fucking time and now that I’m just about t-to forget about you, y-you show up and…” you trailed off as your anger boiled over and your tears started to trickle down your face more heavily.
“Y/N, I’m sorry-” He started.
“Y-you better not be trying to manipulate me!” You warned, your voice raised in accusation and he shook his head.
“I know it might seem that way b-but I’m not, love. I’m not looking for anything from you, I know I don’t deserve it. I just needed t-to see you and apologize to you and tell you how I feel before you wouldn’t entertain the idea of me in your presence ever again. And I know you probably hate me so much right now-” He explained and you inhaled sharply with a disappointed shake of your head.
“That’s the stupidest fucking part of this whole thing! I-” you stopped and shook your head, “I felt so happy when I heard from you.” You confessed, “And I still have so much love for you.” You sniffled and felt sick to your stomach just admitting it. You felt like an idiot for it.
You had gone over a very similar scenario in your head if not millions of times before while daydreaming or lying in bed. You dreamed of him coming back and apologizing and you having the strength to not come crawling back to him after whatever excuse he gave. Except you’d gotten it wrong. Harry wasn’t standing before you asking you to come back to him with an underlying arrogance that came with knowing that your love was enough to have you come back to him. He was actually just coming to be accountable for his mistakes and to apologize to you for hurting you. He came with humility and sincere repentance for his errors, no ulterior motives. And well, you weren’t nearly as strong as you thought you’d be by now.
“Oh, baby…” he sighed, “I don’t deserve it.” He recognized, “And I know that you’re happy.”
“I am.” You sniffled.
“I’m sorry if I made you feel confused, I really didn’t want that. I really just wanted to make things as right as I could after all this time.”
“Thank you.” You responded and he gave you one firm nod. “I think I should go.” You said and he glanced into your eyes and just waited for a moment and when you didn’t waiver he exhaled and moved out of your way to let you leave.
You reached for the door and opened it up before stepping out into the hall, pulling it shut behind you as you cried quietly as you walked back to the elevator, what seemed like a trap before now felt like your much needed escape. You were just about to step inside when you glanced back down the hallway at his door, questioning if you’d been too harsh. After all, you did miss him and you still loved him…you’d definitely regret not giving him a hug goodbye or even just confirming to him that you forgave him. So with all the strength you had, you ignored that pull to return to him and got inside and left. It was time to move on.
****************
You’d been quiet and in your head all afternoon. Internalizing everything you were feeling was weird because you were never one to just let things brew in silence. You had to talk about it and your best friend was back in the UK and she had an important work thing in the morning so you couldn’t interrupt and you just wanted to talk to someone who would be 100% real with you. You decided to just distract yourself until stopped by for dinner, surely his company would provide an adequate distraction.
But even when Steven arrived you found yourself ruminating on how awkwardly you’d left Harry. You certainly got what you needed but you were out of there so fast that you had no idea if he got the closure he needed from you and now you felt bad! That’s what you were thinking about, but your silent and pensive demeanor had Steven feeling iced out which he did not like. So after sitting in your little living room on his phone for half an hour in complete silence as his football game droned on, on the TV he figured he’d just ask you.
“Babe, are you upset at me?” He finally asked as he came into the kitchen. You were just grating some carrots into the salad you were making for dinner.
“No.” You assured him with a small smile as you glanced up at him briefly.
“Well, you’ve been oddly quiet since I got here. More than half the time I’m wishing you’d just shut up for five minutes but I don’t know anymore…it’s weird.” He joked, trying to make light of the situation. But upon hearing that your brows pinched in confusion and offense at his “joke”.
“That’s quite rude and not funny at all. I heard you turn on the game and you don’t like it when I talk to you when you’r watching so I just stayed quiet.” You mumbled a bit spitefully before going back to grating and he came closer and placed a hand on your hip.
“Damn, you’re so sensitive, it was a joke.” He said mawkishly and your irritation continued blooming so you refused to look at him, “Y/N, you’re clearly in your head about something and now you’re taking it out on me.” He said and you sighed.
“I’m not taking anything out on you, Steven. I’m just thinking some stuff through.” You shared with him.
“Stuff like…?” He pressed.
“Like…my ex, Harry.” You said and he straightened up at the mention of Harry’s name.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” He asked with a sardonic smile and you put down the carrot and glanced up at him.
“You asked.” You emphasized and he huffed out a sarcastic laugh, “I’m not done, so listen up because it’s good news for you.” You said and he clenched his jaw and nodded, “Well he’s in town and he asked to see me so we could talk,” You explained and Steven’s expression twisted into a disconcerting look, “so earlier I met up with him and we talked-”
“Wait.” He cut you off, “Why the hell would you think to go see your ex?” He asked you, fully offended over what you’d done this afternoon.
“I went to get closure! And well, considering we’ve been talking about starting a relationship in the near future it’s good for us that I just close that door for good.” You explained and he shook his head.
“And you didn’t think to tell me about this before you went there?”
“It happened so fast and I know you were meeting clients all day so I-”
“You should have at least asked if I was fine with you doing that!” He groaned with frustration and you frowned.
“Like…ask you for permission?” You asked and he shook his head.
“Don’t put words in my mouth, Y/N.” He snapped quickly.
“I’m not, I was asking for clarification. You said I should’ve asked if it was alright with you before going. Is that not asking for permission?” You asked and he sighed.
“Look, not permission but like…at least consider me! Like, have me be there so he doesn’t get any ideas.” He said and you looked at him like he was completely delusional.
“W-what?!” You asked in disbelief, “Why would I invite you into a conversation with me and my ex about our old relationship?” You questioned.
“Because, I need to make sure nothing weird is going on! And if you didn’t want me there, which you clearly didn’t, then you should’ve asked if I was cool with you going to meet him all alone! It makes me uncomfortable to think of you two alone.” He said and you were complete confused at his logic.
“And what if you said that no, I couldn’t go?” You asked.
“I would’ve said no and you would’ve not gone.” He rebutted confidently and you were in total shock, “You have no business talking to him again, Y/N.” He added and you sighed and shook your head in exasperation.
“I wanted answers and an apology, Steven. I am owed at least that! And he took responsibility. He was able to give that to me.” You said and he scoffed.
“You’re…you’re so fucking naive.” He said and you looked at him in confusion, “It’s a test. He was testing you! Testing you to see if you’re still loyal to him. Testing to see if he still has power over you! And guess what? By going there all alone the moment he called you up, you confirmed that for him. You confirmed that he still owns you!” He was speaking to you in the most belittling way. You felt your rage flaring up inside of you.
“What are you even saying?!” You scoffed in disbelief, “It was just a conversation! I was in and out of there in less than 10 minutes!” You laughed incredulously.
“10 minutes? Really? That alone fucked you up so much you couldn’t talk to me?” He asked with a sardonic look on his face and you rolled your eyes, “See now, I’m not so sure that something else didn’t happen between you two.” He soft-launched his accusation and you scoffed.
“Nothing happened! I’m telling you that he said what he needed to say and I just left!” You explained, “I’m just thinking on it because I don’t feel right about just having left like that.” You explained, “It was awkward, the way I handled it. I didn’t even ask him if he had any questions for me or anything else to say, I was selfish. I just got the apology I needed and that was that.” You said a bit sadly and his jaw clenched for a second before biting down on the inside of his cheek.
“You promise that was it?” He asked you after a few moments of silence.
“I promise! Literally we just talked.” You reiterated and he nodded.
“Fine. I’m sorry.” He said grumpily, like a child who is dying inside because they had to apologize. You imagined he was feeling a bit ashamed or even embarrassed for jumping to conclusions like that and being so off the mark. So you walked up to him and hugged him tight as you rested your head against his chest. You relaxed in his arms and smiled when you felt his hand grab your jaw and angle up your face. Your eyes met for a few tense seconds, you were preparing for him to ardently kiss you but suddenly his hand fell from your jaw and grabbed around your throat, right beneath your jaw. Your eyes widened in fear as his grip got a bit tighter by the second. His eyes were dark as he stared into yours.
“S-steven.” You gasped in concern as you started to run out of oxygen. You tried to wiggle out of his grip, eyes watery and full of fear as your nails dug into his wrist hoping to startle him out of whatever possessed him to do this.
“I don’t want you talking to or seeing him again. Never again. Do you understand me?” He demanded and you felt your entire body just turn cold. You had no idea how to even react to this change in Steven’s demeanor so you just nodded. “You’re going to be mine soon and I need to know that I can trust you fully.” He said “I want to trust you. But can I? Can I trust you to stay away from him?” he asked and you nodded again, you’d do anything to get out of this situation, “Then say it. Swear to me.” He insisted darkly as he loosened his grip around you.
“I-I’ll never talk to him or see him again.” You whispered, “I swear.” You insisted with tearful eyes and he let you go before walking out of the kitchen silently. 
You grabbed onto the counter because your legs unexpectedly lost their strength. You were panting, struggling so hard to breathe as this entire interaction processed in your brain. You suddenly felt extremely nauseated as a wave of fear overcame you. You trembled wordlessly for a bit, feeling so devastatingly mortal. You’d never had such little power. You’d never felt so small. After a short, uncomfortable, and contemplative moment you grabbed the carrot you had been working on and got back to grating. You just had to take deep breaths and grate.
You were walking on egg shells for the remainder of the night, doing anything and everything to act as normal as possible and not bait him into another aggression. Meanwhile, he was genuinely chatting with you so casually, as if he hadn’t just grabbed you by the throat like that. It terrified you that he wasn’t acting, he was genuinely fine. You were questioning yourself now, wondering if there were signs you missed? Granted, you were now getting into more serious turf, but there was nothing that you’d seen before that indicated towards him ever behaving this way. Even as you lay in bed attempting to get some rest you just stared at your ceiling thinking about that moment. How dark his eyes looked…did you need to tell someone? It’s not like he’d actually hurt you…or threatened you…he just made you promise to stay away from Harry. There wasn’t even a mark on you. Who would believe you or what could you even do about it?
He sweetened up intensely after that though and it had your mind reeling. Even when you’d had sex earlier he had been so possessive. Normally, any type of sensual talk got you going but when he told you he was “going to make you his” as he finished it didn’t have the usual or intended effect, it made you feel uneasy and made you regret having slept with him after what had happened earlier on. You immediately hopped into the shower because you just needed to wash off the memory of him of on you. You held in your tears because you thought he would join you but he just called out a goodbye after some minutes. But even in your solitude you were practically frozen and emotionless. You’d never experienced him like that and it worried you, so you decided to talk to your friend about it.
*****************
You were nervous to talk to Marie about this because she was also his cousin, but you just needed to know if there was a history to Steven that you didn’t know yet. Maybe he’d done something like this before, just got aggressive and overly possessive with another partner? Or perhaps he’d been cheated on and severely overreacted because of his past hurt? But Marie’s sort of distant demeanor should’ve tipped you off that things were not going to be good with this conversation.
“Thanks for meeting me. I actually wanted t-to talk to you about something important.” You said as soon as the waiter left after bringing your drinks. “Something that happened w-with Steven.” You said and she pulled away from her straw.
“Look, you don’t need to tell me what happened, Y/N.” She interjected, “Steven already told me.” She said flatly and for a second her anger seemed just. You were glad she was angry at him for you. “And look I love you and you’re my friend, but quite frankly, I can’t believe you’d go and hook up with Harry after how good Steven has been to you.” She said and your jaw dropped in shock.
“W-wait what?” You asked incredulously.
“Don’t do that with me, Y/N. I know how weak you are for Harry.” She said and you shook your head, “I mean…I did warn Steven early on t-to be careful and take his time with you because you’d probably cave and run back to Harry.” She said and you frowned, “But after all this time? I mean Jesus, Y/N! The man pretended like you didn’t exist for almost a year! How little self respect do you have t-to allow him back in after everything?!” She questioned you with disappointment and a harsh judgement.
“Is that really what you think of me?” You asked her and she sighed.
“Look, I’m sorry for being so harsh but I love you and I’m angry at you for cheating on my cousin. He’s a good guy!” She defended her stance and you shook your head.
“I didn’t cheat on your cousin. We’re not even in an official or exclusive relationship so even if I had fooled around with Harry he has nothing to be upset over! He’s the one who hasn’t wanted to be exclusive yet!” You corrected and Marie smiled incredulously down at her drink, “You don’t have to believe me about Harry if you don’t want but believe this, Steven? He’s not a good guy.” You said and she looked up at you again fully offended.
“Y/N, look-”
“No, listen to me. I just need you t-to hear me out. Last night he…h-he grabbed me really hard by the throat and made me swear I would never talk to or see Harry again. He terrified me.” You confessed and her eyes didn’t even soften up, “I came t-to ask if maybe I’d struck a nerve by mistake, looking to justify how he behaved towards me but the fact that he got to you first and lied about what happened…that just confirmed to me that I want nothing to do with him. He’s a ticking time bomb and I refuse to be collateral damage.” You said as you stood from your seat.
“How dare you.” She said and stood as well and you shook your head. “You can’t just go around throwing accusations about someone like that! Especially about this sort of thing! It could ruin him, Y/N!” She said with a quiet and calculated rage.
“Believe what you want, but I want nothing to do with either of you ever again.” You said to her and walked off. When you sat in your car you were trembling with rage, you could not believe the last 24 hours of your life. You were just collecting yourself before taking off, you didn’t want to get on the road with that much anger flowing through your veins. You jumped in surprise when your phone started ringing loudly from your purse and you groaned and reached for it and when you saw Harry’s name on the screen you just felt a wave of comfort and then it turned into fear. You knew Steven wasn’t here but you couldn’t help but glance around your immediate surroundings before answering the call.
“Hello?” You spoke into the receiver tentatively.
“Y/N, I ummm, I need you to come down to my hotel right away if you can.” He said to you and you felt your stomach drop.
“W-why?” You asked him nervously.
“Your boyfriend broke into my suite and tried to attack me.” He said and you gasped. “Are you alright?” You asked instantly.
“Yeah, thankfully. But now h-he’s telling the officers that you put him up to this.” He said lowly, “Just come and we’ll sort this out.” He assured.
“Okay, I’ll be there soon.” You said and took off despite your heightened emotions.
Just before you arrived to Harry’s suite you saw a pair of officers guide Steven away down the hall in hand cuffs. He had a bandage over his nose and a busted lip. He barely held eye contact with you as they pulled him along. You rushed down the hall and hurried into the open suite more than relieved to see a paramedic only icing Harry’s hand while he talked to one of the officers looming over him.
“Oh my god, I’m glad you’re okay!” You exclaimed in relief and he stood right away and hugged you tight as you leaned into him and that’s when all of your emotions from even the night before caught up with you and you started to cry. 
“Hey, hey, hey, it’s alright. I’m alright.” He assured you lowly.
“Yeah, but sometimes you minimize things to not worry anyone so…” you reminded and he chuckled a little as you pulled back, “I’m so sorry about this, H. Sincerely. Genuinely! I-I can’t believe he went as far as pulling something like this.” You expressed, still quite flabbergasted at what had gone down. Harry rubbed over your back in comforting circles.
“It’s alright. I’m alright.” He assured you, “He’s worse off than I am.” He smirked a bit as he delivered this news.
“Oh, I saw.” You chuckled through your tears and he hummed. “You’re not gonna get into any trouble, are you?” You asked.
“No, love.” He assured you, “I acted in self-defense so we’re all clear there. He did give me a good scare though.” He said more seriously and you sighed. 
“This never should have happened…I just don’t get it where this came from? I swear, this is not at all like him! I’ve never seen him behave this way in the couple months we’ve been seeing each other. Even last night was just so out of character for how he’s always been towards me! And I’m not trying to make excuses for him. Clearly this is fucked-”
“Wait. What happened last night?” Harry asked you more seriously and you sighed and shook your head.
“Nothing, really.” You said to him and he gave you a look, not a scary one, just an insistent one. You sighed and shrugged, “Last night when I…when I told him we met up to talk and get closure he got really angry at me. Like, he was livid. It was truly an overreaction to me mentioning that I was really happy over having received that apology from you but that I felt like I had been awkward about it and left it weird with us.” You explained, “Then, he asked why I didn’t ask for permission t-to talk to you or see you or why I didn’t ask him to come with me? And I explained that I agreed to meet with you so that we could clear the air so that I could move on with him in peace and he accused me of fooling around with you.” You explained monotonously as you felt like you were there all over again, “I assured him we just talked and he then pretended like it was fine and apologized half-heartedly… and I went in to hug him but then it’s like a switch flipped.” You recounted what had happened, “I thought he was going t-to kiss me but he…” your voice faded out into an exhale, “H-he grabbed me so hard by the throat and made me swear that I wouldn’t see o-or talk to you ever again-”
“Miss?” One of the officers interrupted and you turned towards the officer as Harry released you just a bit. 
“Yes?” You asked softly.
“Can you elaborate more on this altercation?” He asked and you swallowed thickly.
“I don’t want to get anyone in trouble.” You said softly, eyes now laser focused on Harry’s dangling pendant as your vision started to blur with more building tears. You were scared more than worried about getting Steven into any more trouble and Harry could see that. “Love, look at me.” Harry insisted and you blinked rapidly as one of your tears trickled down your cheek before you looked up at him, “If he did anything to scare you, you need to report it.” He said, “He’s fucked as it is for this, he can’t do anything to you ever again. He won’t.” Harry assured you and you nodded.
You proceeded to explain what had happened and how he had grabbed you. You explained that you felt intimidated and frozen and unsure of what to do next after the altercation. You were asked why you didn’t call the police or make a report and you explained that you didn’t think there was anything to report. He hadn’t technically hit you or injured you. You had no visible marks on you or anything to prove this apart from the fear you’d been harboring ever since. But the officer informed you that even a forceful grab is considered assault in the sate of California. And that speaking to you that way, exerting any tactics to make you feel subdued or intimidated were also considered acts of aggression and intimidation that were reportable offenses. And after a few more questions and you assuring them that he had never done anything like this to you before they moved back to the situation with Harry. With police reports filed they went on their way and you offered to get Harry a new place to spend the rest of his trip.
**************
It was just a few hours later and you were sitting in your living room waiting for Harry to come out of the shower and for his lawyer to arrive. You felt awful for this whole thing with Steven, you really had no idea he was a psycho like this. Marie had actually tried calling you almost 20 times and had sent you about 15 texts asking you to call back and that she was sorry for not believing you earlier. You were still too angry at her to respond so you put your phone on “Do Not Disturb” and just focused on the TV and wondered if it was a good idea to have brought Harry to your home. You had found another place for him to stay but before you booked it he asked if it would be alright to use your guest room because he was concerned for your safety since Steven knew where you lived. 
His concerns were valid. And you knew that Steven was well connected and had several lawyer friends who you were sure could get him out on bail by the morning, so you agreed to let him stay. You just didn’t want to also put Harry in harm’s way again. You would never forgive yourself if Steven did anything to hurt him. All in all, none of this felt real, you felt like you were in an unhinged daytime soap episode just waiting for another tragedy to befall you and those in your life. You were so on edge that you flinched in fright when the doorbell rang. Once the shiver passed through your body you hurried over to see through the peephole and saw Harry’s lawyer waiting there.
“Hi Darius.” You greeted him with a smile and he smiled back upon seeing you as well. It’d been quite a while.
“Y/N! Wow!” He chuckled, “It’s so great to see you!” He greeted you happily as you led him inside.
“Likewise! I think Harry’s just finishing up his shower, he had quite the day.” You said as you locked up behind him and he sighed.
“Yeah. I’m so sorry to hear about that. But I’m glad he’s safe and that you’re also safe.” He assured you and you thanked him before guiding him over to the kitchen and allowing him to get set up while you went to grab the Coca-cola he’d requested. 
It was just a couple of minutes before Harry joined you two and caught up a bit with Darius before he got into the story of what happened. Harry was going to follow through on pressing charges and he was even more motivated to get it all done ASAP when he heard what Steven had done to you the night before. He wanted to give Darius his statement as well while it was fresh in his memory so that it matched up perfectly to what he’d told the police and so he started answering the questions while Darius recorded and took notes as well. But hearing it in detail for yourself made it all the more sinister for you. You weren’t even thinking about it all that deeply when you reached for Harry’s hand under the table and he paused and briefly looked at you.
“Sorry.” You mouthed and started to pull it away from him but he instead tangled your fingers together and kept talking.
You stayed at his side for the rest of the time until Darius left, assuring you both that he’d let you know as soon as any headway was made in this case. With a final farewell you were locking up behind him as Harry waited for you just a small distance away. You sighed and turned to him.
“I’m so, so sorry about this, Harry. If I had know that he would do something like this… I mean, I just shouldn’t have said anything to him about you or-”
“Hey, it’s not your fault. How were you supposed to know, love?” He asked as he grabbed your face gently, right under your jaw and you swallowed thickly and he quickly slid his hands down to your shoulders. “Shit, I’m sorry. I forgot.” He said and you shook your head.
“It’s alright. It’s still fresh.” You reminded and he sighed and shook his head.
“I’m sorry…if I had just come back to you when I was supposed to we wouldn’t be in this mess.” He said and you sighed.
“You weren’t happy though, I mean…you preferred to be alone all this time instead of back with me so…it was the right thing for you at the time.” You said to him.
“You forgive me though, right? For not…” he trailed off and you nodded.
“Yeah, H.” You assured him and he pecked your lips quickly.
“Thank you.” He said quietly.
“Of course.” You whispered back. Your lips still tingling from his quick kiss. 
“Sorry, I just needed to kiss you.” He said and you smiled slightly.
“I get it.” You assured him. “D-do you want to…sleep with me?” You asked with a little bit of hesitation.
“Yeah, love.” He said without a hint of a doubt, “Of course. I’m a bit shaken up myself.” He said and you nodded.
“C’mon then.” You said and grabbed his hand and guided him to your bedroom. You guys washed up and then cuddled into your bed. 
You faced each other silently, just looking at each other, taking each other in. You were telling each other you had missed each other with your shared, longing gaze, but you refused to touch. You both loved the static and electric feeling buzzing between your bodies far too much. It was masochism in its purest form. It hurt to be apart, you missed his vibe. His energy. His presence…Harry was a warm, little ball of light, even on his dark days. He was the kindest, most thoughtful person you’d been is fortunate to encounter. He was so hard on himself also, and you knew he was angry at himself right now. You didn’t want him to be though, you wanted him to be here with you and enjoying this reunion, however unfortunate the situation was that led to it. 
The amount of love you felt for him was impossible. As you laid in silence you smiled because you had truly missed the sound of his breathing. You inhaled his exhales, feeling more than grateful to be within his reach. You wanted to feel him on you, skin to skin. You shivered as you felt this intense love just surge through you.
“Harry?”
“Yeah?”
“I love you.” You said softly and sincerely. His eyes glanced down, averting from your gaze as he smiled in disbelief. “I mean it.” 
“Even after all this time?” He asked, “After everything I’ve done?”
“I didn’t say I wasn’t hurt by you.” You smiled and he chuckled, “But yeah, I still love you despite those things.”
“Enough to give me another chance?” He asked.
“I…I mean, yeah.” You chuckled nervously. “And I don’t know i-if I’m a complete fool for that?! But I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too, baby. More so lately…” he said and you hummed.
“Why’s that?” You asked.
“Umm…I was cleaning out your side of things. Like to send ‘em back to you and I just…I found this little box in the corner on your side of the closet-”
“The memory box!” You exclaimed, remembering its existence.
“Yeah…I just got to see all of the wonderful things we’ve shared together. How you’ve been there for absolutely everything. You’ve never let me down.” He said softly, “And I just…felt like a total fool for dismissing that. Nothing feels the same without you, you’re the thing that just…tied everything together, you know? You made my heart feel…whole.” He explained, “When I say that I miss you that’s what I mean. I’ve been incomplete without you around, Y/N. I’ve been missing you from everything. I’m so sorry that I waited until I almost lost you to reach out to you…” he whispered with shame. You frowned and reached for his cheek
“Everything happens for a reason, honey.” You whispered, “I mean, I’m glad you came along at this time because you saved me from a potentially dangerous situation.” You said more solemnly.
“I’m glad I was here for this. May-maybe this is a…sign of sorts for you to come back home with me.” He said a bit carefully. 
Harry was nervous to bring this up to you but he really just didn’t want you staying anywhere near this man. He wanted to be certain that he could keep you safe, that he could protect you and ensure that you were never so easily in harm’s way again.  And on top of that, his love for you continued simmering lowly in the background, it had never gone out. He just fled out of fear and he regretted it so much. He had been selfish and didn’t realize it until far too late. It filled him with gratitude that you’d even hear him out for an apology, let alone give him another chance. A chance that he may have blown with this suggestion he’d just put out there.
“Ummm…I…I’m not sure w-what to say to that.” You responded honestly, “Like, my first instinct is to say yes.” You chuckled nervously and while he was relieved to hear that, he held off his excitement to hear what would come next, “But like you’ve acknowledged a couple times already, we’ve been apart for a while and I think we both hurt each other to some extent and I worry that…in jumping right back into where we left things off that we’ll forget about all of the issues that led to us breaking down instead of working through them.” You said and he hummed.
“Yeah, that’s extremely valid.” He responded, “And I guess I want this right now mainly because I don’t want you here all alone.” He explained, “I realize we have things to work through before we can get to where we were before all this. And I’m so willing to put in the work with you to get to that stage again. But right now I just want to ensure that you’re safe and far away from that prick, Steven. That’s my main concern as of now, baby.”
“Well thank you for worrying about me. I would love to leave with you but I don’t think it’d be a smart move.” You sighed.
“Even just for a few weeks until things cool off a bit? I can set you up somewhere else even.” He said and you bit your lip pensively.
“I’ll think about it.” You responded.
“Okay, that’s…that’s enough for me.” He whispered back.
***********************
It  was a couple weeks later when Steven finally showed up at your place. Obviously you had the locks changed, so his key didn’t work, which really angered him. And when you heard him shouting at you and pounding on the door, threatening to break in if you didn’t allow him in, you immediately called the cops as you had a restraining order filed against him. You also recorded everything this time as you tried to calmly coax him into leaving before they showed up. He was angry that Harry was pressing charges against him and he wanted you to talk him out of it. You knew better than to say anything about Harry’s case, so instead you asked Steven how he even got access to Harry’s location. Up until this point it was all speculation, you just assumed he grabbed the information off of your phone, that really was the only way. But there was no proof yet that this was a premeditated aggression on Steven’s end. So when he confessed to you that he searched for the information on your phone you were relieved and would submit that as further evidence to get a more strict order against him.
He refused to leave and the longer you didn’t let him in the angrier he got and even broke a window. Thankfully, the police were just arriving when this happened and they submitted an Emergency Protective Order, this was far more strict than the restraining order but that was really all they could do. You really didn’t feel safe anymore so the next morning you contacted your landlord and explained to her what had happened and let her know that you’d have to terminate your lease early for your safety. She was kind and didn’t make you pay the extra fee or even make you finish out a whole month, she just hoped you’d fine somewhere else soon. 
You contacted Harry and of course, he said you could stay with him for a little bit. You felt stupid for not just doing that to begin with like he had suggested. But the reality was that he had also hurt you and let you down and you were worried about what moving in together again so soon would do to impact your future. But for the time being this felt like the safest choice. Steven knew your friends and co-workers in the area thanks to Marie, so there was no one you could go to in LA that you felt he wouldn’t think of. It pained you to quit your job and pack up your life and go, but you needed to. Of course, Harry welcomed you with open arms and you were grateful to know that you were a whole continent and ocean away from LA right now. 
*****************
It had been three weeks of you living with Harry and things had been going well so far. You felt drained though, like completely fatigued from everything, you often felt this way when you were anxious or depressed so you prioritized reconnecting with your therapist from before right away. You were seeing her every week so far and were eager to see and feel the results of doing this deep and healing work after what had happened to you and Harry in LA. You also reconnected with a few friends and they were helping you network a bit to find a job. Harry assured you that he was more than capable to take care of you but you didn’t feel comfortable with that, especially since your romantic future together was still a bit up in the air.
You two were doing well, you were reconnecting as friends more than anything right now. Living with him was comfortable though, you had lived together before though, so you knew how to exist in the same space together. You soon noticed that just being in a situation that was familiar to you both was making you both more affectionate towards each other though, which you both had been working hard to keep at bay. Of course, the feelings were there, but having those little things that reminded you, you weren’t alone made you smile, like now…
“Baby, I’m home! Are you here?” Harry called as he came into the house.
“Yeah, I’m in the laundry room!” You called back over the rumble of the washing machine as you folded your laundry. Moments later he was coming into the small, warm room with a smile on his face.
“Hi, love! How was it today?” He asked as he came up to you and hugged you.
“It was good. I met with Poppy and her friend, Sheila, she’s the one who just started up her own tanner line or something and needs an accountant? She’s interested, so I’m meeting with her and her partner again her next week when she’s back from her vacation to see about the position.” You shared.
“That’s really good. Hopefully it pans out.”
“I hope so too.” You said as you dropped the t-shirt you were working on in the basket with folded laundry so that you could interlace your fingers as you clung to him.
“And like I said before though, no rush, okay? You’re doing plenty to help out here. And after everything else you’ve been through, taking it slow can’t hurt.” He added.
“Thank you. I really do appreciate that, H.” You smiled.
“Of course, love.” He hummed. You pulled back slowly and looked into each other’s eyes. “I’m really happy you’re here.” He reassured you.
“Thank you, baby.” You whispered.
“Baby?” He asked with a grin and you rolled your eyes and sighed.
“Well, I mean…you call me that, so…”
“It feels right, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah.” You agreed with a smile.
“I love you.”
“I love you too.” You whispered with a smile. He tucked your hair behind your ear and kissed your cheek.
“Can I kiss your for real?” He asked you quietly and you just nodded. Moments later your lips met in a tentative kiss. There was a little bit of hesitation at first but seconds later you were kissing with more depth. Your hands held his as he cupped your face tenderly as you continued to kiss. You’d kissed very quickly a handful of times since your arrival but nothing like this where you could feel yourself getting all hot and bothered by it.
“Baby…” you mumbled into the kiss.
“Right…sorry.” He hummed and let you go breaking the kiss abruptly and you chuckled as you blindly reached down your leg and finally grabbed the dryer sheet that was half hanging out of the dryer and tickling your leg. You crumbled it up and tossed it in the garbage bin just a few feel away from you before turning back and looking up to him.
“You can continue now.” You said with a small smile and he grinned before picking you up and setting you on the dryer as your mouths met with more urgency. Your kiss and need started to grow and grow and boil over very quickly.
It really wasn’t planned when he carried you to his room and got you undressed. Even though you’d yet to resolve everything from before, you didn’t feel worried or wrong about this. You felt comfortable and beautiful as you felt his bare skin against your own. You were eagerly awaiting it as he kissed down your body and made you feel so good along the way. He wasted no time in getting down and going down on you, showing you just how much he had missed you. He savored you and gave you his best until you were starting to lose your grip on reality.
“Oh fuck, I missed you…” you giggled through a moan as his tongue did it’s wonderful work between your legs. You were tingling all over as he flicked over your clit until you were trembling and then he started to suck, “Oh my god!” You gasped as your eyes started to roll back. “I’m getting so close!” You warned. 
Your lips parted and you started to pant when he started to work two fingers into you. Your breath hitched when he curved them up into your g-spot. You felt your body melt into the bed for a second before he started to fuck into you harden until you were so tense your legs trembled as you started to come. The soft moans flowing from your lips were egging Harry on, making him even more hungry for you. You pulled him back up to you and your lips met eagerly as you reached for the button of his jeans.
“Want ‘em off?” He asked and you nodded, “Sure, baby?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, baby. I want you. I need you.” You whispered and he smiled before kissing your lips quickly before pulling back a bit.
“I just…I need you to know that if we do this I want us t-to be the thing that means we’re going to try again.” He said and your gaze softened, “Obviously, I’ve missed your body and having you like this, but this is more than that to me. I want it to  be more than that.” He said and you nodded.
“I do too, baby. I want to try again. I really do.” You said to him with welled up eyes and he smiled and kissed you slowly again.
“You are everything to me.” He mumbled as you helped get his pants off blindly as he tugged the material down, “I’m never going to forget that again. I swear it, baby. You make me so fucking happy.” He panted as he toed off the pants before he climbed over you and pulled you up with him towards the the top of the bed. You climbed over his lap and kissed his passionately. Harry’s hands roamed your naked body with expertise. He knew the spots to touch and to pay mind to as you guys worked up to the love-making bit. You too appreciated his body. You touched and kissed over his body and took his length into your mouth, working him up just a bit more before you two had sex. 
“Shit, baby…fuck that’s so good!” He groaned as you sunk down on him until you gagged around his tip. You weren’t as used to his size as you once were. 
“Careful, baby. Go easy.” He reminded as he stroked over your cheek lovingly before running his thumb along your stretched out bottom lip. He loved seeing how you fit him in your hot little mouth. It had his abs clenching hard as you rolled and fondled his heavy balls in your hands until he was fighting the urge to start thrusting in your mouth. “Baby, please…please, I need you.” He panted and you popped off of him and glanced up at him.
“Can I get on?” You asked and he swallowed thickly.
“A-are you sure you want this?” He asked and you nodded.
“I do, H. I want this with you. I want everything with you. Everything that we had, I want it all back. I love you more than anything in the wor-” he cut you off with his kiss and laid you down. You were dying of impatience as hi heavy erection glided against your slicked up and swollen folds, you were so ready to have him back.
“I love you. I love you so much.” He whispered as he lined up to your entrance.
“I love you too. Please just…I need you.” You begged and so he pushed forward until he was sinking deep in your hot, wet little hole until he bottomed out. 
You hissed as you adjusted back to his size, he was great about it, so patient and eager to get you going by rubbing over your clit until you were so wet you were sliding up and down his shaft. He watched you hungrily as you lifted your hips up and down to feel him moving inside of you. But it got to the point where he needed to take over and just get you both to come. His thrusts were deep and slow, he was bottoming out with each one, it was making your brain blank each and every time he sunk into the deepest part of you. Your body was tingling and your walls fluttering and pulsing around him with every movement. Everything felt so good with him. He was looking down at you with so much adoration it was making you even more emotional.
“Baby, baby don’t cry.” He chuckled as he kissed your forehead as a few tears streamed down your cheek.
“It just feels so…good.” You sniffled and he kissed you quickly, “It feels so good to be with you.” You hummed as you rolled your hips up against his and he moaned lowly and kissed you again.
“Yeah? Are you gonna come for me?” He asked and you nodded. “Good girl, let me know when you’re getting close.”
“I will.” You whined out as he delved deep and ground against you until your eyes squeezed shut, “Shit!” You gasped as he started thrusting a bit faster into that spot until you just felt yourself leaking around.
“Fuck…” he laughed, “Fuck, you’re so wet f’me, I-I’m getting close.” He panted and you whined and started to rub your clit to catch up to him.
In a few moments you were right there on the edge with him. Your back was arching as you moaned his name as your orgasm nearly took you out. Your ears were ringing and your vision was blurring as you started to come around him. He started to thrust faster to get off, but he was drawing out your orgasm until you were trembling.
“Fuck…fuck, I’m coming!” He warned as he started to press himself up to pull out. “Oh fuuuuck…” he moaned as he started to stroke himself as he came all over your mound. He thrusted his sensitive cock through your folds, making a little mess of you before kissing you ardently. “I love you. Love you so fucking much.” He whispered, his voice cracked as he started to cry and you pulled him into your chest and held him tight as you both just let your raw emotions out in this moment. 
You both needed it desperately. After he settled down he hurried to get something to clean you off and then you started to talk about you two. What you wanted, what you hoped to see in the future. You’d had these conversations before but even now the things that Harry was saying to you were complete different than before. Losing you seemed to be the thing that woke him up to how much he’d been taking you for granted. He’d gotten used to it, he’d gotten complacent at your expense.
“It’s going to be so different this time.” He said softly as he looked deep in your eyes, “I will be different this time.” He assured and you sighed.
“I believe you…there’s just a little part of me that is still not ready to let you back in.” You explained after he had explained how he was going to show up for you from now on, “I want to just trust you fully, but I’m afraid that you’ll make a fool of me again. That you’ll hurt me again.” You explained, “And I know y-you won’t but I just need to let you know that I’m still learning to trust you fully again.” You explained. “So please just…be a little patient with me.” You requested and he smiled.
“I know, baby. I will be patient with you and I will do everything I can to prove to you that I will never do anything to make you doubt choosing me again.” He said and kissed you slowly. You smiled into the kiss and let him pull you closer to him again and that’s how you fell asleep, nestled close together.
….. ONE MONTH LATER ….
In this short amount of time things had drastically shifted between you and Harry. You’d started to go on a date a week, doing thoughtful things for each other, sharing your feelings as they arose, communicated openly…he’d matured a lot in your time apart and helped you overcome your fears faster than you anticipated. You were so proud of him and it was spilling over into every moment. Like now, you were filled with a surge of love as you wandered into the kitchen to see him pulling out your favorite salad dressing from the fridge.
“Hiya, baby. What’re you up to?” You asked.
“Just making us your favorite salad for a light lunch.” He said.
“Wow, lunch already?” you asked and he smiled as you went over to him and hugged him from the back as you peeked over to his hands, eager to direct him on how much dressing he needed to add.
“Yeah, love!” He chuckled, “We had breakfast at 8! It’s already past 2pm.” He informed you and that surprised you. But you’d been so sucked into your work that it was very possible that you forgot to even feel hungry.
“Oh, I didn’t realize.” You explained and he frowned a bit.
“Baby, have you been feeling alright? It’s not just today, I’ve noticed that you haven’t had much of an appetite at all lately.” He pointed out and you frowned as you gave it some thought and realized that yeah, this was something you’d been feeling for at least two weeks. Maybe it was intense PMS? You hadn’t gotten your period since moving here, so you hoped it was just your body finally catching up with itself.
“You’re right…I mean, I have very visceral reactions to stress and big changes…I mean, my whole body and system have just been out of whack for a little but they’ll balance out again.” You assured him and he hummed.
“That’s true, it’s been hectic for you.” He said as he opened up the dressing bottle, “Honestly, I was thinking that-” he stopped as you gagged as the scent of the dressing wafting up towards you. You had to let him go and go hunch yourself over the sink as you felt the scent of the dressing just linger in your nose and mouth. “Baby…?” Harry came over and rubbed your back slowly, “Are you alright?”
“Yeah…” you grimaced, “But I think the dressing is bad. Didn’t you smell that? It was rank!” You turned to him with a disgusted look on your face and he frowned.
“I didn’t smell anything. You look a bit awful now though. You’re all pale.” He said feeling your forehead and you exhaled slowly to ward off the nausea that you suddenly felt making your head spin.
“I might throw up, the dressing smells so bad.” You explained and he frowned and turned to the counter and brought it up to his nose and it smelled just fine to him. He even checked the bottle for the usage date and it was still good. 
“This is fine…should I mix your salad with something else then?” He asked and you shook your head.
“I think I’m fine. I’ll just have some toast.” You said and he nodded. Eventually, you had to go back to your “office” and leave him hanging for lunch because you could not handle the look and scent of the salad, especially that dressing. By the time dinner rolled around you were still feeling a little off so you just had some veggies in a chicken broth and that was that.
*******************
You’d truly forgotten about your sensitive sense of smell until once again, you were assailed by an unbearable scent. Except this time it had happened at your friend, Poppy’s house. And this time you did actually get sick.
“God, I’m so sorry, P.” You apologized as you returned to her kitchen with embarrassment, “I swear its not your cooking, my nose has just been so sensitive lately and I get to grossed out by certain scents. I’m not sure what exactly yet though.” You explained to her.
“God, you sound like my sister when she got pregnant.” Poppy chuckled and you froze. That hadn’t even crossed your mind. Yeah, you’d missed your period for the last two months but literally everything impacted your period, your cycle was fickle, especially when you were under as much stress as you’d been. You weren’t surprised that it hadn’t come at all. Truly, this wasn’t new to you, especially when you were stressed out, regardless of whether or not you were on the pill (which you weren’t after moving back here, you’d run out the week before you came out). Then, you recalled that when you and Harry had sex the first time he hadn’t used a condom. Yeah, he’d pulled out but that was never a guarantee.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Poppy asked you with concern.
“I think I should probably take a test just to rule that out. I mean, it’s…very unlikely but I was a bit irresponsible a bit ago and just need some peace of mind.” You said.
“Okay, I have some in my bathroom, let me get you one.” She offered and you nodded so she hurried off to get it for you.
You were sure you were good, but you just needed to see it for yourself. There was absolutely no way you could be pregnant, you weren’t ready for that. Harry wasn’t ready for that. Like emotionally you guys were, but you had just rekindled your relationship, the last thing you needed was something this crazy to throw a wrench in things so quickly after you’d gotten back together.
“Alright, here you are, babe.” She said handing over the box as she came up to you again.
“Thanks.” You smiled nervously.
“W-would you mind if I did it here?” You asked her and she smiled and shook her head.
“Of course not.” She assured you and with that you were off to the bathroom again, sitting there, willing yourself to pee enough to saturate the stick and finally it came and you put the cap back on it and washed your hands before coming out. “I hate to be that person but what if you are pregnant?” She asked and you sighed.
“I have no idea…” you confessed through a nervous chuckle while you stared at the wall blankly, “I mean, H and I just…God, we’re just getting back into the groove of things. Throwing a baby into the mix at this time isn’t going to make anything easier. It’s just not what we need right now.” You explained to her.
“Yeah, I get that.” She chuckled, “Cam and I try and then we stop because of the same thing and like…ugh, it’s just a vicious cycle! And genuinely, if you have that many doubts it’s just that you’re not prepared for it, you know? That’s what I had to tell Cam after a few months.” She explained and you nodded in understanding. “I-if you are…what do you think Harry’d say?” She asked and you sighed.
“I have no fucking clue…” you admitted, “Obviously, before, we had said we wanted to have a family together. But again, that was before everything went to shit with us.” You sighed, “And like, we’re in such a good place right now…” you sighed, “Like I know he wouldn’t be a prick about it but we’re not quite ready for that yet.” You chuckled nervously and Poppy nodded in understanding.
“Well, don’t worry, you’ll see in a few minutes that everything is fine.” She smiled with encouragement. 
You decided to believe her that everything was going to be fine. You were already booked for a full body, deep tissue massage next week with Poppy when your timer went off. You turned off the timer and then brought the test up closer and your heart stopped beating and you stopped breathing for what felt like an eternity. Staring right back at you, clear as day, were two little pink lines.
“Th-that means I’m…right?” You asked showing Poppy and she bit her lip nervously and nodded.
“Are you okay?” She asked you with concern and you just exhaled slowly. You were completely taken by surprise. Then you started to get worried.
“I ummm…I think I need to get home.” You said to her, still in shock. You swallowed thickly as you tried to imagine how Harry would react to the news that he would be a father.
“Do you want me to drive you over?” She offered, since you had walked from Harry’s to hers. It was just a 20 minute walk, you guys lived quite close.
“No, no, P, it’s alright. I think walking will be good for me, I need to…I need…” you trailed off as your eyes started to well up with tears as you started to imagine the worst case scenario.
“Hey…Hey, hey, hey, c’mere.” She said pulling you into her arms as you started to cry, “It’s going to be alright, babe. H is not gonna be angry, you know that.” She assured you as she rubbed comforting circles into your back as you held her tight. “You have options, yeah? You know that he’ll have your back no matter what.” She said and you nodded, “Let me get you home, yeah?”
“Okay.” You whispered to your best friend and she gave you one more squeeze before letting you go.
  Once you got to your place she encouraged you to have a shower and that she’d get some tea going for you. You texted Harry that you needed him to come home as soon as possible, you didn’t want this solely on your chest for another minute. You took your time and when Harry started pulling into your driveway Poppy popped in and let you know before shouting a goodbye to you. You sighed and relished in the warm water for just another moment before turning off the water. You were soon reaching for your robe and slipping into it. You padded over to the mirror to wash your face and you bit your lip before untying the robe and looking over your body. You looked the same, you saw no evidence of a baby.
“Baby?” You heard Harry calling from downstairs. Soon, his footsteps were heard coming up the stairs and you quickly tied your robe up and got to lathering your face wash in your hands.
“In the bathroom!” You called back before rubbing it into your skin. He rushed into the bathroom and looked more than relieved to see you intact.
“Are you alright?” He asked and you sighed and quickly bent over to rinse your face. You then dabbed it dry as you reached for your toner.
“I think so…” you responded after a little bit, “I don’t know.” You sighed as you grabbed your moisturizer.
“Well what’s going on? Hmmm?” He asked you as he came over and kissed your shoulder, his arms wrapped around your middled and pulled you in closer and suddenly you had to throw up again. You gasped and wriggled out of his hold and turned around to face him. Your eyes started welling up with tears again and you were just building up the courage to say it. “Baby, you’re worrying me.” He said softly and you swallowed thickly.
“Ummm…I…I’m pregnant.” You said and his jaw slightly dropped. He let out a small and nervous laugh before he just pulled you back into his arms without a single word. You hugged him back and just held each other for a little bit.
“What do you want to do?” He finally asked you and you shook your head.
“I have no fucking clue…” you said and he let you go and hoisted you up onto the counter. You draped your arms over his shoulders as he held your thighs, “I mean, what do you think?” You asked and he sighed.
“I don’t fucking know…I mean, that’s gonna be our baby so I…like I’m inclined t-to give it a try. But at the same time I don’t know that our relationship is ready for something like this. I mean, I want this with you in a few years but we’re just getting started again.”
“I know…I don’t even know how this…like you pulled out.”
“I know, but it’s not always a guaranteed thing.” He said and you sighed.
“I should’ve said something then…” you shook your head as you rubbed your forehead with one of your hands.
“Hey, there’s no point for any would’ve-should’ve-s,” he said, “It’s gonna be alright. We’ll figure it out soon, okay?” You nodded, “Just take your time, baby. Whatever you decide, I have your back.” He assured you and you nodded. He grabbed your face and kissed your lips until you were smiling.
“Stoooop.” You giggled, “M’not in the mood.” You pouted through your smile and he smiled.
“I think you’re lying.” He hummed and you rolled your eyes. “Look, how about we get an appointment with the doctor and see how far along you are and maybe that’ll help us decide what we might want to do.” He said and you nodded.
“Yes, good thinking.” You smiled, “God, I was so scared to tell you.” You sighed and he tutted.
“What made you think to take a test?”
“I smelled something P was cooking and got sick.” You said, you felt tour cheeks growing hot in embarrassment. Harry chuckled and then furrowed his brows pensively. 
“Didn’t you almost get sick at the salad dressing a bit ago?” He recalled and you chuckled.
“Yeah, that’s true…” you remembered, “I mean, I know I haven’t gotten my period but-”
“How was that not a sign?!” He chuckled in disbelief and you proceeded to explain how your period often skipped when you were under a lot of stress so this wasn’t an odd thing for you. But he was sweet, he was calm, but you could see the cogs just turning at full speed in his mind. You hoped he wasn’t angry at you, but you couldn’t help but think that he was and that he would run again. “I’m not angry, you know?” He mumbled softly and you glanced into his eyes and smiled a bit, “I can see it in your eyes, you know?” He whispered.
“You sure?”
“I am, baby. But I am…excited too…I mean, I don’t want to dwell on it too much incase we decide not to proceed with this but…I am. I mean, you’re the only person I want to have a life with. No matter how it happens, it’s you that I want to have babies with and raise them with and just share that experience with. So if you did want to continue with the pregnancy that would be good with me too.” He hummed.
“Okay. Thank you for your opinion.” You whispered before kissing his lips and hugging him tight against. You kissed at his neck as you just nestled yourself in the crook of it. “I love you.”
“I love you.” He smiled.
…. TWO DAYS LATER ….
You currently found your self peeing into a cup at the doctor’s office. You knew you were pregnant, but the doctor wanted to verify before they did an ultrasound to see where you were at. Once you finished you closed up the little jar and left it not he shelf as instructed. You washed your hands and then scurried across the hall and back into your room to see Harry intently reading the poster on the wall abut pregnancy.
“You know you get super horny during the second trimester.” He said in amusement, “As if you needed any more of that while pregnant…greedy.” He mumbled with a grin and you chuckled.
“You’re dumb.” You said as you went back over to the bench and sat again. You dangled your feet back and forth for a bit before Harry came over.
“What’re you thinking?”
“I’m thinking that…this is fucking insane.” You chuckled.
“In a good way?”
“Yeah…bad too.” You hummed and he nodded and leaned in to kiss your cheek.
“It’s going to be just fine, baby.” He assured you right as the doctor knocked at the door. “Come in!” Harry called and soon the woman was coming in.
“Hello, Y/N!” Dr. Sallow greeted you sweetly, “Glad you’re back!” She said with glee and you smiled.
“Thank you.” You replied, “And ummm, this is Harry, my…partner.” You said and she turned to him and smiled.
“Harry, wonderful to meet you.” She smiled and extended her hand and they shook them quickly before she walked over to the screen. “So, you’re here because you are pregnant.” She said and you nodded, “I can confirm that.” She smiled and Harry squeezed your knee when you inhaled sharply. It sort of felt official now. “So we can definitely do an ultrasound if you’d like, the room is available. Or did you have other questions?” she asked.
“Definitely an ultrasound. Want to know how far along I am and that sort of thing.”
“I’d assume fairly early if you’re just noticing any symptoms, so don’t be too disappointed if we don’t see much of anything just yet.” She forewarned and you both nodded. “Alright, I’m gonna have nurse Debbie set up the room and then she’ll escort you over and we’ll get a look at you.”
“Thank you.” You smiled and soon she excused herself before fluttering off to her next patient. You only waited a couple of minutes before nurse Debbie came to escort you to the ultrasound room and got you all set up. Harry was practically bouncing beside you with anxiety as he waited. 
“Let me get the doctor.” Debbie said and hurried out. You glanced over to Harry.
“Hey, hold my hand.” You said and he dragged a chair over and interlocked your fingers. “I’m so excited to see.” You whispered and he grinned wide.
“Me too.” He confessed and you chuckled. “Maybe we…think a bit more about keeping it…” he suggested and you smiled a bit.
“Yeah? You mean it?” You asked softly and he nodded.
“I do, baby.” He smiled. 
A few moments later Dr. Sallow was announcing herself again before coming in. She explained the procedure and then got the gel on you before grabbing the camera and gliding it over your tummy, looking for the best spot.
“Oh…there we are.” she hummed and Harry immediately shot upon seeing the image projected on the screen.
“Oh my god…” he whispered as he squeezed your hand tight and you smiled up at him quickly before you both glanced back over to the screen.
“So that there is the head and the arms and legs…” she pointed out and shifted the angle, “Do you want to know the sex?” She asked as she turned to you and you chuckled.
“That’s…ummm, isn’t it a bit early to know that?” You asked her and she shook her head.
“Not at all, we can tell as early as 10 week if the position is right.” She explained and you’re heart stopped.
“And I’m already 10 weeks along?” You asked shakily as the realization of what this meant started to settle in. You felt Harry starting to pull his hand away from yours.
“Oh no, you’re more like 14 weeks, dear.” She said and that’s when Harry completely pulled away from you and you felt the air completely leave your lungs. You turned to him and he just clenched his jaw as he ran his fingers through the top of his hair. “So do you want to know?” She asked and you were so frozen that you nodded quickly as your eyes teared up. “It’s a girl.” She said with a smiled and you just nodded.
“That’s…that’s so great.” You whispered and then brought a hand up over your mouth in an attempt to muffle the sound as started to cry. Dr. Sallow turned to you quickly with concern and then you felt Harry’s hand grab yours again. You turned towards him and saw he was crying too. “I’m sorry.” You whispered and he shook his head.
“We’ll talk about it.” He said to you softly and you nodded.
“Is everything alright?” Dr. Sallow asked and you sniffled.
“Sorry, yes. I just didn’t mean to say that.” You explained and she apologized but you assured her it was fine. 
You just wanted to get out of there… you were mortified. This wasn’t Harry’s baby and now you really had no idea what to do. You always used condoms with Steven, but now that you knew he was psycho, you had no doubt that he was capable of sabotaging you like this. More than anything you were so hurt and angry that he had taken this from you and Harry. For a second you almost turned and asked for an appointment for an abortion but you glanced at the screen and you were flooded with guilt for even thinking that.
“Ummm, I’d like to leave.” You said as you started to sit up and Dr. Sallow was quick to clean you off. Harry helped you off of the reclining seat and you were back on the road not even ten minutes later. 
You were just silent the whole way home, you felt like shit. You felt awful for getting Harry all excited only to know that this was not his child you were carrying. You were so confused right now, you almost wanted to pinch yourself and hope you woke up. You could feel Harry continuously glancing over at you but you couldn’t look at him. There was no way you could look at him after this. It was over between you two…there was no way you could ask him to stay with you after this. It wouldn’t be fair to him. When you got to the house you made it to the stairwell and plopped down as you started to sob violently.
You moved to the side when you saw Harry coming over, assuming he was just going to go up to the bedroom. But then he crouched down and sat a step above you and pulled you into him by the shoulders.
“It’s o-”
“Don’t say it’s okay.” You cut him off, “This is not okay.” You whispered sadly. “I hate Steven.” You seethed and he swallowed thickly as you started to sob and he pulled you closer and kissed the side of your head.
“I love you, okay? This doesn’t change that for me.” He said to you and you shook your head.
“I would never ask you or expect to stay. It’s not fair to you, Harry…” you said sadly, “I was about to tell Dr. Sallow that I wanted to abort but then I saw the screen again and I just…I don’t think I can do it. That’s like…a part of me too and I just…I don’t think I can go through with it.” You said again, sputtering on your tears. “If that means that we’re over, I get it. I totally understand it.” You sniffled.
Harry frowned deeply as he heard you say this. His heart was completely torn right now. He thought you were reacting this way because you were going to terminate the pregnancy upon finding out that it wasn’t your baby together. But hearing you say that you wouldn’t be able to do that, it made him so angry and so hurt. Despite his own feelings about this, he fully understood why changed your mind. After seeing the tiny little thing tucked inside of you his heart was in shambles too. He was fully ready to advocate for you guys keeping it, but hearing how far along you were, it completely shattered his heart. He felt physically ill as the moment replayed in his brain. You’d both slept with other people during your time apart, so he wasn’t angry at that, it was more that it was Steven’s. A man who had hurt you and disrespected you and that scared you. It made the hate he felt for him grow even more intense than it already was. He was livid, he could kill him for taking this from you two. Harry had to decide how he would proceed from here. You were fully prepared to leave him again in order to keep this baby and the thought of it put so much sorrow in his heart. He didn’t want to lose you.
The idea of leaving you and letting you do this all on your own made his sad. You didn’t deserve that. You deserved to have a good pregnancy, one that came with a supportive partner, someone to share the experience with. He wanted to be the person to be there for you but right now the thought of that little thing growing inside of you made his blood boil with hatred. He couldn’t think clearly in the slightest. 
“I ummm…I love you so much, baby. I just, I think I need some time t-to process this and just think about it all.” He said to you and you nodded. “I love you though. You know that right?” He asked and you nodded again as he kissed the side of your head.
“Love you too.” You whispered and he hummed. “Should I go for a couple of days?” You asked quietly.
“No, baby.” He said quietly, “You stay here and rest up.” He hummed lowly, “I think I’m gonna go up north and just spend a few days with my mum, clear my head, if that’s alright?” He asked. You wanted to say no, the last thing you wanted right now was to be all alone with this information. But you had no choice but to agree, you had just put him in the most impossible position and he deserved to have the space to think about it as calmly and comfortably as possible.
“Yeah, sure.” You whispered.
“Can I tell my mum?” He asked and you sighed.
“Why the fuck not…” You chuckled through your tears and he pouted.
“Hey, look at me.” He insisted, “I won’t if you don’t want me to, baby. This is about you, about your body. If you want me to keep it to myself I will.” He assured.
“Sorry. I’m just afraid that it’ll change how she feels about me.” You explained nervously. You’d had a wonderful relationship with Anne. You missed her wisdom and kindness and friendship during your time apart from Harry and hearing that another man had impregnated you, her son’s girlfriend, well you’d understand if it upset her. 
“No…I mean, things happen. Accidents happen.” He said and you shook your head.
“Baby, I-I don’t think this was accidental because we used a condom every single time. I’m certain of it!” You wept, “Like I’m not stupid, or careless like that.” You assured.
“You think he ruined the condoms?” He asked and you sighed as you recalled all of the overtly possessive things Steven had been saying to you during sex the last month or so that you had been together. Things about making you his forever, about giving him babies one day, making you a mom…you thought he was just introducing some of his preferences in bed with that kind of talk, but maybe it was more than that. 
“It’s very possible.” You said softly.
“Jesus…” he shook his head, “How fucked up was this guy?” He asked you and you shrugged.
“I never saw that side of him before all of this.” You said and Harry sighed and nodded. After a moment of silence he cleared his throat.
“Ummm…I’m just gonna pack and head out soon, want to avoid that rush hour traffic near Birmingham.” He said and you nodded. 
He stood up and then offered to help you stand as well before you guys went up to the room. You sat on the bed as you watched him pack a couple days worth of clothes. You wanted to ask him to stay, but you couldn’t be that selfish. This was the least you could do for him after that a-bomb was just dropped on him. Not to mention the a-bomb you’d just dumped on him too. When he finished packing up his bag he went over and kissed you quickly.
“I’m not running away from you, okay? I just need to clear my head.” He reassured you, his words were mumbled against your forehead before he kissed you there, “I love you so much.” He whispered before kissing your lips.
“Love you.” You mumbled, “Text when you get there, yeah?”
“I will, baby.” He assured.
“Be safe.”
“Always.” He hummed before he bid you farewell once more before he left. 
Once you heard him pull out of the driveway you just curled up on your side and started to cry. This couldn’t be real…there was no way this could be real. You felt completely defeated. The only thing you could think that made you happy was that you never wanted Steven to know about this, you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction. You had no idea how that would go down with your child in the future, but right now you wanted him not to know a single thing about you ever again. After coming to that conclusion you ended up calling your mom and telling her everything that happened. You talked and cried for nearly an hour before she had to go, but not without promising she’d call again and chat the next day in order to keep you some company, even from afar. 
After that you decided to draw yourself a warm and relaxing bath, that always made you feel so calm. So you started out on that, letting your bath bomb melt in the warm water as you made yourself a nice cup of tea, your last caffeinated one for the foreseeable future, and then got inside.
*****************
Harry had been driving up the M1 motorway for a bit before he quickly texted his mum his ETA. This caused her to call him right away and ask what this surprise visit was about, but he couldn’t speak when he answered her call. He just sobbed, he sobbed for nearly 15 minutes before he shared what had happened that morning at the doctor’s office. He explained everything he was feeling, even the bad things he was thinking, but the one thing that kept coming up was how much he loved you.
“I love her so much but I just don’t think I could get past the fact that, that prick is the baby’s dad…I cannot for the life of me sit with that information and not become enraged by it.” He said, it pained him to spare Steven a thought.
“D-do you feel angry at Y/N for being with him?” She asked and he frowned.
“No/ It’s not like I didn’t see other people but I hate that she thinks that I couldn’t be with her after this. Like, I think about letting her go, like she’s saying, and it absolutely guts me.” He explained. “And like…I feel bad that it crossed my mind at some point, but not for the reasons you might think, it’s just that I don’t know i-if I am even prepared to take that role on.” He sniffled.
“No one ever is, even when it’s meticulously planned, H.” She reasoned and he sighed,
“Are you concerned about him wanting to come back into her life?” She asked and he nodded.
“Yeah…a bit.” He admitted, “I mean, I don’t think he’s the type to take any accountability for his actions but if he finds out about it he’s so arrogant that he might want to just to make her uncomfortable. I mean, Y/N thinks it may have been deliberate because she said she always made sure t-to use protection. I mean, I wouldn’t put it past him to do something like that, the man was completely mad.” He shared and his mum hummed in understanding.
“Well sweetheart, it doesn’t sound to me like you’re all that conflicted. It sounds to me like you don’t want to end things with her.”
“Of course not! But what if I…what I can’t love that baby as much since I now know this?” He asked.
“I-is that what’s holding you back?” She asked and he hummed on confirmation. He felt like a complete prick saying that but he was legitimately concerned about this. What if you went on to have your own kids together and it just changed something in him? What if he was open to being with you now but then changed his mind? What if he saw Steven every time he saw that baby and only felt anger instead of love? The chances of something like this happening were extremely low, practically non-existent, but not 0%. And in the end he would hurt you and that baby even more if he walked out because one of these things happened.
“You know what I think?”
“What?”
“I think you will love her just fine, H. You know why?” She asked and he hummed, “Because out of everyone in the world you know the impact that one incredible and dedicated man can have on a child.” She said and he sniffled, “You’ve seen for yourself that a biological connection is not needed to give someone unconditional love and support. You’re lucky, you got that from two fathers.” She said and he smiled.
“Yeah.” He whispered.
“I’m not saying that it won’t be scary and difficult at times t-to do this, but it can also be extremely beautiful and rewarding. You’re both such wonderful people that if you decided to stay and do this together you could impact that child’s life for the better, just like yours was.” 
“Right…” he said softly
“And well, honestly sweetheart, these concerns you have, they’re things you need to figure out with Y/N. She will listen to you, H. I mean, if you’re feeling this conflicted about things I can’t image how she must be feeling now.” she said with sympathy and when he saw himself nearing Birmingham he felt awful. It got as bad as him feeling sick to his stomach as he pictured your fearful and distraught face back in the bedroom. He’d done it again, he’d left you hanging at a time when you needed his love and support the most. He loved you so much, he could not believe he’d left you alone in that state. And in two seconds he started to signal to get off of the motorway.
“Mum, I ummm…I need to go back and be with, Y/N.” He decided, “I shouldn’t have left here there by herself after everything she had to hear today…I’d be surprised if she was still there after I just walked out…fuck!” He groaned in frustration.
“H, she loves you so much.”
“I love her too…why do I keep doing the wrong thing and hurting her?” He cried now as he got off at the next exit. He was waiting for the traffic to clear before he could make his turn to turn around.
“I think it kind of scares you, how much you love her. And I think in a way you might feel like you could lose her, so you pull back regardless of how that might make her feel. It’s self preservation.” She explained and he swallowed thickly. Hearing this helped him mentally decide that he wasn’t going to run any more, after everything he’d done you’d given him another chance regardless of the possibility of him hurting you again. This was his chance to show you that his love for you was bigger than everything else. “Don’t be afraid to open your heart, sweetheart.” She added and he hummed.
“Alright, thank you for listening. I’m just gonna call Dr. A and ummm…hopefully sort some mental things out before I get back to Y/N.” He said.
“Okay, bub. Be safe, please let me know when you’re home safe. I love you.”
“Love you.” He mumbled before he hung up and got back onto the motorway but heading back towards the South. He wasn’t going to do the same thing again and leave all alone to guess just how much he loved you, not this time. He was going to be there for you and support you and love you both.
*****************
It was a bit odd to you when you heard the large gate to Harry’s house opening up. But then you recalled that sometimes his PA would do errands that required him to come to the house. So you just got out of the tub quickly and rinsed your body off in the shower before getting into your robe in case he came upstairs for any reason. You were just getting one of Harry’s hoodies when you heard his voice.
“Baby? Are you still here?” He called out as you heard the front door shut heavily against the frame. You hurried into the yoga pants you’d grabbed and rushed out to see him coming up the stairs. 
“You came back.” You sighed in relief as he hurried up and he just pulled you right into his arms and you started to cry.
“I’m so sorry. I should never have left you like this, baby.” He sniffled as he kissed your head over and over again. “I love you so much. I love you so fucking much.” He assured you. “I’m not leaving you alone with this, baby.” He said to you and you pulled back a bit to look at him.
“What do you…mean by that?”
“It means that we’re doing this together.” He said to you and you shook your head.
“I can’t…I couldn’t do that to you.” You said to him and he shook his head.
“You’re not doing anything to me, baby. If you’re keeping this baby I am choosing to do this with you. I know it’s going to be hard but I will be there for you every step of the way and love our little babygirl with everything I am. I love you far too much to not see this through with you.” He said and you just broke down and hugged him tight.
You had no words, there was just joy. You knew this would be hard and challenging and even sad at times, but he’d come back to you and he wanted you to stay with him.
“I love you so much, H.” You finally whispered before kissing his lips.
“You’re everything to me, baby. We’re gonna get through this.” He smiled and you smiled.
“Promise?”
“I promise.” He smiled, “It was actually my mum who reminded me that biology had nothing to do with being a great father, so…she doesn’t hate you.” He said and you chuckled through your tears.
“Good, that would’ve definitely been the worst outcome.” You said jokingly and he smiled. “And look, I know that there are a lot of logistics and other things to discuss and I’m still sorting through that mentally, s-so if you can just be a little patient with me while I…get that together in my head I would really appreciate that. I’m still processing that there’s a little person forming in there and it’s kind of…freaky.” You said as you looked up into his eyes and he sputtered on a laugh. You frowned at his reaction, “What?”
“I thought you were going to say it was magical or amazing, not freaky.” He giggled and you did as well. 
“Oh…well, I…I don’t feel…happy about it yet.” You confessed to him and this brought on a fresh wave of tears, “I feel like shit about that. Like I’m gonna be a mom, I should be happy, not freaked out, shouldn’t I?” You asked him.
“Not necessarily. You can feel however you want about it, baby.” He assured you, “Especially in this situation, it’s come as a surprise to you. I don’t judge you at all for not feeling happy about this yet, baby.”
“Promise?”
“I swear it.” He promised before pecking your lips again quickly.
“Thank you.” You whispered and he nodded and smile at you.
“Wanna do something to take your mind off of things for a bit?” He asked.
“Like what?”
“We can…sort through the pantry and fridge and see what foods you’ll have an aversion to?” He offered and you smiled and shook your head at his bizarre, yet completely productive suggestion. “I see you trying to hold back your smile.” He teased and you finally gave in.
“That’s the wildest but most genius thing you’ve ever suggested.” You giggled.
“I know. Imagine how smart our kid’s gonna be?! We’ve got this in the bag.” He said confidently.
“You think so?” You asked and he nodded.
“With you as her mum, I know so.” He smiled.
…. 1 YEAR LATER ….
You woke up feeling completely refreshed and renewed. It was absolutely quiet in the house and it was strange to wake up in silence. When you rolled over and looked at your phone you saw it was nearly 10am and shot out of bed. You had no idea how you’d slept in that much! The baby needed to be fed and changed! You hurried over to the nursery already thinking up an apology in your head for Ellie. But when you made it into the nursery it was empty. Harry had some work to do for Pleasing today so you knew he’d be out. Maybe he called someone to come look after the baby? When you passed by his home studio on the way to the kitchen you heard his voice along with others, so you knocked on the door.
“Come in!” He called quickly and you peeked inside and immediately smiled when you saw Harry spin around in the chair with Elara sitting on his lap, she was literally just chilling there while she drooled all over one of the newer nail polishes Pleasing would release soon. He smiled at you over the sounds of whoever was speaking right now. “Hey guys, are we good for today or is there anything else we needed to go over?” He asked with a smile as you waved from the background.
“We’re all good!” You heard and then heard the multiple voices bidding farewell to you and baby Elara before he hung up.
“You didn’t have to do that.” You said to him as you walked into the room to grab her from him.
“It’s alright, baby, we were just chatting a bit.” He assured you, “Weren’t we?” He asked the baby who just ignored him to keep attempting to bite the bottle in her hands before he started to rub at her back.
“I know you had work, you should’ve woken me up.” You said as you kissed his head.
“No way.” He chuckled, “You know, you slept through two whole alarms, you clearly needed the rest. I thought you were dead for second there.” He said with grin and you tutted.
“Don’t even say that.” You scolded.
“You’re right, sorry. Bad joke.” He corrected himself, “But really, my love, I don’t mind doing these launch plan meetings online, it’s none of the fun stuff so.” He shrugged and you smiled, “Besides when I have Ellie on camera everyone is so obsessed with her little smile that they’re so agreeable, so it’s a win-win.” He chuckled and you smirked.
“God forbid the paps see her and exploit her for money, but her own father is exploiting her cuteness for sway in the board room.” You said with a grin and he chuckled.
“Hey, she likes hearing all the commotion too.” He added and you smiled before kissing the top of her head and she sighed and laid over his chest making you both coo. “She finally slept through the night. Sorry you missed it.” He said softly and you chuckled.
“I’m sorry you’re so used to waking up to her crying that you noticed!” You giggled as you raked your fingers through his curls easily and he hummed.
“I don’t mind it. Reminds me that this little cutie is finally here.” He said and you smiled at how sweet he was with her.
“I can’t believe she’ll be six whole months tomorrow.” You said in disbelief.
“I know…S’your half birthday, bub.” He said to her and she just blinked tiredly, "She’s perfect though, isn’t she? Your little twin.” He hummed with pride as he looked down at her and then at you again. You nodded and watched him with her for a few moments.
Harry had nothing but love for baby Elara. He adored her completely. He almost felt silly for being so worried that he wouldn’t bond with her as genuinely as if she were his biological daughter. Once he saw you starting to show and you guys started shopping for the nursery, and picking out baby names, every ounce of doubt he had melted away. That was his daughter in every sense of the word. He had so much love for the both of you that he felt like his heart would burst sometimes.
“I love you so much.” You said to him and he glanced up at you.
“More than Ellie?” He smirked and you chuckled.
“The same, I think.” You hummed and he looked surprised.
“Oh wow, I was expecting a firm no.” He laughed.
“Oh my god…I love you both. It’s a bit different for sure but I somehow get it all to fit in my heart.” You said and he smiled as he stood up.
“Look at her, she’s about to pass out again.” He said as he looked down at the baby.
“I think we should get her back in the crib and have a cuddle. We can watch that show you’ve been pestering me about.” He suggested
“Love is Blind?” You gasped and he nodded. 
Soon enough you had washed your face and brushed your teeth, as you did every morning, all while Harry got Ellie down. But he soon joined you in bed as you waited for him to return. He climbed into the bed beside you and like a magnet, you immediately scooted right up against him and kissed him gently, it caught him by surprise.
“Thank you for letting me sleep in, baby. That was exquisite.” You confessed and he smiled and pecked your lips again.
“Of course, baby. Anytime.” He smiled. “I do have a question for you though…when are we going to have another baby?” He asked you and you giggled.
“Ummm, ask me in a year!” You laughed.
“A year?” He scoffed.
“Hey, it’s hard work!” You added and he smiled.
“Yeah, but it’s so worth it, isn’t it?” He asked with a smile and you sighed happily at his response.
“Yeah…” you hummed, “It’s all worth it.” You smiled.
“Our little family makes me so happy, I just want one more.” He said and you glanced into his eyes.
“Just one more.” You agreed and he chuckled.
“Yeah, just one.” He assured you, “So in a year I’ll ask again, okay?”
“Okay.” You sniggered and kissed him quickly again before you got the show going.
You were explaining a little bit about why you were suddenly so interested in this show without trying to give away too much of what you knew had gone down, thanks to your friends and social media. He easily got sucked into the narrative and when you both started commenting as you watched on you just got so happy that you could share something so simple together and then also something as huge and serious as a baby. It made your tummy flutter and swirl with love for him and you then realized that maybe it would be less than a year before you’d be trying for another baby and you were perfectly alright with that.
---- TAG LIST ----
@sunshinemoonsposts @anotherdudetteinthisworld @matildasatellite @sad-avocado @sunflovverharry @cherrysulewski @daphnesutton @gurugirl @reveriehs @ottawaoutlander @jessitpwk @permanentllyharry @here4thefanfics @slutfortigertattoo @angelbabyyy99 @freedomfireflies @behindmygreyeyes @justlemmeadoreyou
These are the friends who liked the ask with the request for this piece:)
@harryssattelitestomper @vanillagirllll @thef0reverl0st @unknown7549 @liviingfxst @leantunes0309 @outofthisworl-d
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romanoffsbish · 1 year
Text
A Prompt List
Feel free to pick and choose from the list for your own stories, as well as send in requests (view my masterlist for who I write for) with whatever prompts if you please, 🥰
Angst/Fluff/Smut prompts listed. (18+)
Bonus points if you take the assigned genre and flip it 🤔😏
———
Angst
“Are you serious?” / “I never wanted this!”
“This was never real, was it?” / “I was just a warm body for those cold winter nights…”
“You are vile…” / “I can’t believe I ever believed someone like you could love me.”
“Nothing good ever lasts.” / “Goodbye.”
“I love you.” / “It’s not enough this time.”
“Please, don’t leave me, we can fix this.” /“You left me first, I’m just finishing the job.”
“I love you Y/N.” / “Why do people only say that to me when they’ve wronged me? Am I not deserving of the guiltless love? Like the ones I see in fairytales, where they get swept away smiling, and not where I curl up to weep in my bed for another damn night.”
“I’m sorry.” / “For what exactly? Breaking my trust, and in turn my fragile heart? Or do you only mean that you got caught?”
“I can’t even look at you anymore.” / “Please…” / “This is the end for us.”
“I can’t live without you, I won’t survive.” / “Then I guess I’ll be back for your funeral.”
Fluff
“There’s nobody else I’d ever love like this.”
“Everything I do is for you—my beloved.”
*while stargazing* “If I could, I’d rearrange the stars for you, have them map out your face, because a beauty like yours should transcend the bounds of Earth my darling.”
“I can’t believe that the world had infinite chances to find me a soulmate, and I lucked out and hit the absolute jackpot with you.”
“Did you know that a kiss is worth a thousand words?” / “You should kiss me.”
“You’re the most gorgeous person here.” / “I’d never lie to you darling, god, I wish you could see you the way I do” / “Perfect.”
“Call them —, the worst they could do is say no to you, and trust me, they won’t…” / “They said yes!!!”
“I’ve loved you since the first time I ever laid my eyes on you.” / “Well damn, why’s it taken you so long to make a move then?”
“I can’t believe my cat/dog loves you more than it’s ever loved me.” / “Actually, on second thought it makes sense, you’re far too lovable to even question it; *pets name* you have good taste.”
“I will never tire of watching you sleeping next to me, you’re just so peaceful, and I get to celebrate that you’re all mine.”
Smut
“Careful what you wish for baby, because I’m nothing if not generous…”
“Where should I sit?” / “The couch works just fine, but if you prefer comfort, my face works far better my darling.”
“I’m not letting you go until you’ve either drenched the sheets, or passed out.”
“Fuck me like you mean it —, let everybody know I’m yours before I no longer am.”
“Aww, did my precious little dove think I’d just let that little stunt go?” / “I was hoping so.” / “You’re sadly mistaken toots, now prepare yourself for a long night full of passion, and if you’re lucky—pain.”
“Mommy isn’t very pleased with the outfit you chose to wear tonight, you made those fools think they stood a chance.” / “Maybe they did.” / *incredulous laughter* “Is that right baby? I go on one week long business trip and you just forget who you belong to? Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ll remind you.”
“Stay still, or I’ll have you warming daddy’s cock all night long.” / “That’s a good girl.”
“I-I can’t take anymore, please.” / “You can take it, and you’ll do it graciously, one more complaint and I’ll edge you all month.”
“Kiss me, please.” / “Is that all you want baby, is for me to kiss you?” / “N-no, I also want you to fuck me senseless, but a kiss sounded far more romantic.”
“If you don’t fuck me, I’ll be doing it myself!” / “I’m coming!” / “No, I am!”
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livyjh · 1 year
Note
I JUST WANT JOEL SMUT IF YOU WANNA WRITE IT GIVE IT TO ME I WILL EAT IT UP
maybe something rough and angsty but still fluffy...
OMG PLEASE TAKE MY REQUEST
Need You Tonight
Joel Miller x Reader
Rating: EXPLICIT 18+
Word count: 1.8k
Joel Miller Masterlist
A/N: god bless you for putting in a request, I came up with an idea for this one that’ll be angsty, fluffy, smutty, and rough 😮‍💨
Summary: you and Joel nearly get killed by infected as you’re making your way back into the QZ from a run. It’s partially your fault. Joel yells at you, but it’s because he cares. Smut ensues.
Warnings: infected encounter, yelling, unprotected p-in-v sex, reader being referred to as a girl, The Pull-Out Method™️ (let me know if I missed anything)
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“It’s going to take us an hour. We’re losing daylight.” You explain to Joel, fighting with him on whether to take the long way or short way through town to the Boston QZ.
He sighs. “Fine. Go on then.” He throws his arm out to motion for you to continue walking.
You had convinced him to take the short way, knowing if you went the long way, you’d be at a great disadvantage in the dark. Or worse, have to find somewhere to sleep that wasn’t crawling with infected. Yeah, right.
You start walking, facing away from the sun as it slowly reaches the horizon. You turn a corner and are greeted by maybe 10-12 infected, laying around, waiting. You’re able to cover your mouth before you gasp too loud, when Joel sees the street he tugs you away by your backpack.
You look up at him for a long moment. “What do we do?” You barely whisper.
He shakes his head. “We should’ve gone the other way.” He sighs quietly, lowering his volume to the same as yours.
“It’s too late for that now.” You shrug. “We’ll sneak past them.”
He looks at you sternly, “No.”
“Just watch your step.” You wave a hand at him, brushing him off.
You turn around and he tries to grab your arm and pull you back. You’re too cocky for your own good.
You pull out of his grip and start walking down the street, the QZ is only 3 blocks away now. You can’t back track.
You hear him curse under his breath before he rounds the corner and follows you.
You’re watching your step, making sure not to step on anything that would be loud. You keep one eye on the infected, too, your gaze switching between them and the ground in front of you.
You glance up for only a second and manage to trip over a telephone line that had come down. You yelp as you fall to the ground, looking to the infected, world going in slow motion.
One of the infected lifts its head and before you know it, Joel is ripping you up from the ground, holding your forearm as you both sprint as fast as you can.
You hear more than one pair of feet running behind you now, not too far behind. You make it to the manhole that’ll lead you underground back to the QZ, you and Joel lifting it quickly.
He pulls his gun from its holster and shoots at the three infected running towards you as you make your way down the ladder.
He manages to kill one, still missing the other two. He follows you down and downs one more before he lowers the manhole cover into place above your heads. You hear the infected being slamming its hands at the cover, trying to get in, but you knew they weren’t quite smart enough to know what to do.
You glance at your watch. 5:48. Curfew was in 12 minutes and you still had to make it back to your shared apartment with Joel.
You can tell he’s angry. He’s stewing and steaming as you make your way home. You don’t have the courage to say anything until the door of the apartment shuts behind you two.
“I’m sorry-“
“How could you be so careless?” He shouts at you, cutting you off.
“It was an accident!” You respond, trying to defend yourself.
“We should’ve gone around.” He scolds you. “Stupidest fuckin’ thing you could’ve done.” He grits.
You frown at him. “But we’re fine. We made it.”
“That’s not the point!” He shouts.
“So what is?!” You yell back.
“I can’t lose you!” He looks into your eyes with his big brown ones.
You pause, thinking. Did he really care about you that much? Sure, you’ve known him a year now, been sharing an apartment for a few months because it was just easier to make plans for runs that way. But you had no idea he was this concerned for your safety.
“Don’t you see?” Joel steps towards you and takes your face in his large hands. “Can’t lose you.” He sighs.
Your eyes flit to his lips and then he’s leaning in, pressing his mouth to yours. You moan softly against him, body tingling.
“Joel…” you whisper against his lips.
“What is it, sweetheart?” He hums.
“Didn’t… didn’t know you felt like this.” You breathe.
“Since before you moved in.” He admits.
You smile and kiss him again, running your hands through his salt and pepper hair, tugging lightly. He groans into your mouth at this, wrapping his arms around your waist. He picks you up and walks you both over to the couch before he sits down and pats his lap.
You straddle him as his hands come up to undo the buttons on your shirt. He pulls it open and runs his fingers down your chest, over your bra covered tits. He takes one in each hand and squeezes lightly before his hands move down over your belly, then center to unbutton and unzip your jeans.
You watch his slow movements, his fingers tucking into your jeans and panties, pulling them down your thighs a little until he can see your pretty little cunt.
Your clit is already swollen, you’re visibly wet, and he can smell how turned on you are.
Joel rubs two fingers down your vulva, over your clit, and to your entrance before pushing inside of you.
“Fuck.” You whine as he enters you.
“Feel good, darlin’?” He asks and you just nod, looking down at where his fingers are inside you.
“Take all this off.” He tugs at the hem of your shirt and then points at your bra.
You take a deep breath as his fingers push all the way into you, slipping your shirt off and then unclasping your bra before tossing it aside.
“C’mere, baby.” He pulls you in by the waist with his free hand, his mouth attaching to your left nipple.
You moan as he starts to suck softly, swirling his tongue around the hardening bud. “Please-“ you beg him. “More.”
He finally starts thrusting his fingers at a faster pace, curling them to find your g-spot. Which he found quickly.
“Joel-!” You gasp, both of your hands gripping his shoulders to ground yourself.
“I got you.” He breathes against your chest, moving to suckle your right nipple now.
He keeps thrusting his fingers, scissoring and stretching you open for him. You could only imagine how big his cock was if he was spending this long preparing you for it.
“Need you.” You moan.
“M’right here.” He leans up to kiss your neck softly.
You shiver when he pulls his fingers from you, blushing when he brings them to his mouth and sucks on them. He closes his eyes for a moment and you’re sure this is the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen; Joel Miller sucking your juices off his own fingers.
“Pants.” He grunts, tugging at your jeans.
You get up for a second, discarding your pants and panties as he pulls himself out.
“Jesus.” Your cheeks grow redder at the sight of his cock.
He smiles up at you, nonchalant. “You can take it. Know you can.” He encourages.
You nod and get back into his lap, kissing his lips roughly. He grabs himself and drags the head of his dick up and down through your folds.
“Fffuck.” You quiver at the feeling, clenching around nothing.
“What is it, pretty girl?” He teases, circling his cock at your clit.
You let out a shaky breath. “N- need you.”
“How long you needed me for?”
“A long fucking time.” You kiss him again and he finally lines up with your entrance, pushing into your wetness.
You whimper into his mouth with each breath, trying to keep yourself relaxed as he enters you. He was fucking huge.
He filled you up slowly, pushing in to the hilt. Once he was all the way in, you whined, resting your forehead against his. He repositioned his hips which got him even deeper for a second and you clenched around him.
“Fuck. Needy, aren’t you?” He breathes against your face.
“Y- you made the first m- move.” You stutter out with a small laugh.
“Mhm.” He hums, kissing you as he lifted your hips and pulled out of you before dropping you back down onto his cock.
“Joel…” you gently pull at the hair at his nape.
“Like when you say m’name.” He lets out a long breath as he pulls out of you again, thrusting back in quickly.
“Feel so f- fucking good, Joel.” You curse under your breath.
He keeps thrusting slowly and your nerves are on fire, toes curling and chest heaving as you pant.
“Y’wanna ride me, sweet girl?” He drawls.
“Please.” You whine.
“Go ahead.” He coos.
He stills his hips and you start to move yours, up and down, up and down. You were moving considerably faster than he had been, but he didn’t seem to care.
You kiss him hard, feeling the head of his cock rubbing against your sweet spot with every thrust of your hips.
“G- gonna cum, Joel.” You sigh against his lips, reaching down to play with your own clit.
His eyes watched your fingers work at your sensitive bud. “Fuck. Okay. Cum for me, honey. You can do it.”
You whimper as you feel yourself get closer and closer, chasing your orgasm desperately. You thrust faster on him and that’s what does it.
You cum hard, biting your lip to quiet the scream you almost released. He’s supporting your hips as you move on him, your slick dripping down your legs.
“Fuck, baby.” He moans, rolling you both over so that you were on your back, laying on the couch as he fucked down into your cunt.
“Where d’you want me to finish?” He grunts, pulling out of you.
You whimper at the loss but know it’s for the best. You motion to your torso.
He nods and scoots up, his knees against your ass. He’s stroking himself quickly, the sound of his wet cock in his hand making you bite back a moan.
He growls as he orgasms, his free hand gripping the inside of your thigh as his cum spurts up your belly and chest. “Fuck, darlin’.” He curses, looking at your chest as he decorates it with his release.
His hand slows as he calms down, moving to sit down next to you. He brings your legs to rest on top of his as he rubs your thighs with calloused hands.
“Don’t think I could do all this without you.” He admits.
You smile at him, reaching for your discarded shirt to clean your chest and stomach. It needed to be washed after today anyways. “Couldn’t do it without you either.” You smile at him.
You both end up getting into his bed, naked and cuddled up against each other as you fall asleep.
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Text
Harry's Erectile Dysfunction Gets in the Way of Your Sex Life (SMUT)
AN: i don't know much about anxiety medication side effects so if this isn't 100% accurate, don't come at me. i really hope you enjoy. i know so many ask for me to write angst and i normally don't feel comfortable writing it but i did write just a bit in this story. enjoy!!!
This story contains: erectile dysfunction, mentions of anxiety and anxiety medication, body insecurities, crying, tiny bit of angst, smut, fluff sprinkled in everywhere
{ dadrry/dilfrry - husband!harry - soft!harry - both in late thirties - have four kids }
word count: 2,718
After months of no sex, you think Harry isn't attracted to you anymore but after confessing your assumptions on why the lack of sex has occurred, Harry breaks down and confesses his secret that he's been trying to hide from you out of pure embarrassment.
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Over the past few weeks Harry hasn't been feeling himself. In several aspects too but the one that sticks out to you the most is his sex drive. Normally anytime you're in the mood he'll be all for a little shag under the sheets while keeping quiet so not to wake your kids up. Or normally he'd be up for you giving him a blowjob in the shower. But it's been weeks and nothing, barley even a kiss. And you're starting to think he's not attracted to you anymore.
You've always been told that after being with someone for so long and after having a couple of kids, your sex life will dissolve. You don't want that. You loved the sex you once had together. You and Harry may be in your late thirties but just months ago were having sex nearly every day. So what's changed, you ask yourself.
Is he turned off by your body? The body that has extra fat on the tummy from housing your four babies. The stretch marks that are on your plushy hips and thighs. Your not so perky boobs. Does Harry think of your body and get the urge to throw up from looking at it? The thought makes you want to cry.
But then again you have to remember who you're talking about. You're talking about your Harry. The Harry that would always tell you he loved your body. The one that would liter your skin in kisses while making love. The one that runs his fingers over your stretch marks while cuddling but not in a weird way, just in a haphazard way.
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Tonight you think it's gonna be different. You've both just finished putting your children to bed and now you're doing your bedtime routines. Harry is fresh out the shower, the shower he insisted he take by himself for whatever reason, brushing his teeth at the vanity in your shared bathroom, dressed in only a pair of his boxer briefs. While you on the other hand is sitting on the edge of the bed, rubbing your creams and lotions on your skin, dressed in a silk blue nightgown.
A minute later Harry comes walking out the bathroom and goes around to his side of the bed, slipping into the covers. He's about to reach over to turn the bedside lamp off when you stop him with your words. "Hey," you say in a slow drawl before maneuvering over to him, "why don't we, you know, have sex tonight. It's been a while and I want you."
Harry looks over to you with droopy eyes and mutters, "Love, m'so tired. How 'bout tomorrow, m'kay. Just want to sleep." That's what he's been saying, tomorrow, but that promise is never fulfilled. It's always pushed away with another promise of tomorrow.
With tears in your eyes that Harry is unable to pick up on, you say a quiet "Okay." before shuffling under the duvet to get ready for sleep. You turn away from your husband's body to lay on your left side and now in the dark room, you attempt to just fall asleep and forget you even asked for sex. But of course sleep doesn't come easy tonight.
The more you lay there the more you drowned in the thoughts of what your friends have told you about how their partners stopped wanting sex with them after a while. The thought of Harry never wanting sex with you again has actual tears running down your cheeks. And before you realize it, your shoulders are shaking as a quiet sob leaves your body.
The shaking from your sobs has Harry jolting awake from his sleep that he just entered. He sits up in the dark and scoots over to you worriedly and questions, "Baby, what's that matter? Why'r you crying?"
Barely able to catch your breath, you spit out, "You..... you don't find my body attractive anymore. I must be ugly and gross you out, don't I?" That's the only rational thing you can come up with as an excuse for why your husband has been not wanted sex with you. Or the last resort thoughts of, you know, him possibly cheating on you. But your Harry would NEVER, would he.
Harry reaches to turn the lamp back on so he can see you clearly, then retorts a bit offended, "What the hell are you talkin' 'bout? You're beautiful, m'love. You know I think you're the prettiest women in the world."
"Then, then why don't you want to have sex anymore?" you ask back, tired of not knowing the answer. That question has Harry stiffening up and wanting to recoil back into his skin. The short answer is, he doesn't know. He wishes he could tell you but he can't because he truly has been puzzled himself.
About three months ago Harry started to lose his sex drive. At first he tried to keep it a secret and still enjoy having sex with you. But after a time or two it just felt forced for him and he never wanted to have sex with the love of his life when he wasn't feeling into it for whatever reason. It felt untruthful to himself and to you.
Along with the fact that after the last time you did have sex he could barely get hard. You didn't notice because it was dark in the bedroom and he went heavy on the clit rubbing to make up for his lack of erection, but he was mortified. So after that night Harry's been scared to have sex if he's honest.
The thought of you realizing he's not getting hard and thinking it has something to do with your abilities to please him would destroy him. Plus, he's cheeked and he can't even get himself hard when he's alone. So it's definitely not you. "Um," he stutters, "I..... I dunno, really."
You finally turn around to take a peek at your husband and when you do, you feel so incredibly bad. Harry looks sad and hurt, even confused is a word you'd describe how he's looking. Maybe the problem all along wasn't you but rather him. You never thought about it that way.
You sit up so you're more face level with him and ask much more shyly this time, "What do you mean, you don't know? Just haven't been in the mood lately or....?"
Taking a deep breath, Harry starts to explain with a shaky voice, one with emotions evident, "Just, yeah, haven't been in the mood and I can't get it hard. Dunno what's wrong with me. Makes me feel like a shit husband when you ask for me but I can't even get hard to satisfy you. M'scard somethin' is wrong with me."
"Oh, baby," you coo, leaning in to wrap your arms around his tattooed body, "shh, it's alright. In the morning I can make you a doctors appointment if you'd like? To see what they say has been causing your low sex drive. I'm sure it's nothing serious."
"Okay, sounds good. And I love you. Sorry I haven't been able to take care of your needs. Was just embarrassed to tell you that I can't get m'dick hard. Because it's so embarrassing." Harry relies after taking a defeated breath and placing a kiss to the top of your head.
You pull back from his body to look him straight in the eyes and state, "It's not anything you should be embarrassed to share with me though, okay. I'm your wife. I'd never judge you. I love you. And because I love you I miss our sex. But until we can figure out what's wrong with you, I can wait. I'd wait forever with you."
Harry can't help himself when he pushes his head forward and locks his lips to yours. It's a simple kiss mixed with a bit of your snotty nose and wet cheeks but he doesn't mind. After the kiss is over with, you pull him down into bed with you, re-covering yourselves back up with the blankets. and cuddling into one another.
You allow Harry to rest his head on your chest because you know when he's feeling sad or down about something, he likes you to hold him, no matter how old he is. So that's what you do. You hold him while caressing his damp curls away from his face until he falls asleep on top of you. Then you follow right after, falling into a sleep state now knowing that all your worrying thoughts were debunked but also still have a lingering worry as to what could be wrong with your husband. You'll just have to wait and find out tomorrow.
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Once you've gotten your kids ready and drove to school, you and Harry make your way to the doctors office. You'd called first thing this morning to make him an appointment and luckily they had a spot available for him. He told you that you didn't have to come with him but you wanted to be there and support him. Also to just be a comfort for him knowing how his anxiety gets when going to the doctors.
After waiting in the little waiting area for about twenty minutes, they call Harry back. You walk hand in hand to the room designated for him and wait for the doctor to come visit. "M'so nervous, y/n. I feel nausous." Harry confesses, his legs bouncing up and down uncontrollably.
You stand off to the side of where he's sitting on the bed wrapped in plastic paper and coo softly, "It's gonna be alright, baby. It's just your anxiety making you feel that way. You'll be okay, promise."
A minute later the doctor comes walking in with a brown clipboard, introducing herself and questions your reasoning for coming in. "Hi, I'm Dr. Coalett. What can I do for you today, Harry?"
Taking a deep breath, Harry musters up the courage to confess to the doctor, "Well, um, see, I haven't been, you know, in the mood lately when it comes to sex or being sexual with m'wife. I can't even get an erection anymore. M'scared somethin' is wrong with me. It just started happenin' about three months ago. Before then, we had sex a normal amount, maybe even more than average.*nervously laughs at his own words* But now, it's zero sex."
Dr. Coalett listens intently and when Harry finishes speaking, she replies understandingly, "Okay, I see. Well, many factors can come into play with your erectile dysfunction and loss of sex drive. Like age, stress, medications you may be taking. But I'd say we can cancel out the age factor because you've just told me that you've never had a problem up until recently and you're only thirty eight. So, stress and medication could be the cause. And it shows on your paperwork you take, let me see, anxiety medicine?"
You keep one hand running circles over Harry's back to comfort him which is definitely helping him open more up to the doctor. To answer Dr. Coalett back, he answers, "Um, yes. Been strugglin' with anxiety for years but just this past year it got to the point where I needed more help than I could give m'self. So I was put on anxiety medicine and it's been working alright I guess." You're so proud of your husband for speaking so openly with the doctor. You know this doesn't come easy for him.
She gives you both a gentle smile and says, "Alright, well, I think I may know your problem then. I'm not 100% sure but I believe the anxiety medication you were prescribed is the cause of your issues. One of that medications side effects is sexual dysfunction. So here's what I can do. We can switch you to another brand of anxiety medicine and see if that helps with your problems. If it doesn't, you can come back to us and we can examine you more in depth. If it does work, then you should be fine and we can refill the medicine for you next month."
You and Harry both sign in relief. So it's not something too serious. Thank God. As Dr. Coalett is writing Harry's prescription, you speak up to ask her, "So, when should he expect to notice changes with his lack of sex drive, if that's not a weird question to ask?"
She giggles and responds, "No, not weird at all. It can vary person to person but I'd say within the next few days of switching the medication. It may be subtle at first where Harry won't get fully erect or it could be straight forward from the start. You'll just have to wait and see." She hands Harry the new prescription and now you're free to leave after sending the prescription to the pharmacy.
----------------------------
Harry started his new anxiety medication the following day and within hours he could feel a difference. Or maybe it was the placebo effect playing tricks on him. But to be 100% positive, he waited to do anything sexual until he felt absolutely feral. Also he wanted your first time in three months to be special. Not just some quickie in the shower.
When the weekend rolled around and your kids went to spend the night with their grandma, Harry's mother Anne, he knew it was the perfect time to start rekindling your sex life. At this point you knew his erectile dysfunction was fixed and that he was in the mood for sex but wanted to wait until you had the house to yourselves.
Harry set up some candles around the bedroom and laid some towels down so you wouldn't have to change the sheets later that night. Then once everything was set up perfectly to his standards, the love making began. It was possibly greater than your first time ever having sex when you were both twenty years old. Mainly because you're both way more experienced now and know how to properly pleasure each other.
You started out on top, riding his VERY erect cock, but then from the lack of sex recently, fell too weak and tired to stay in that position for long. So Harry worked quickly to flip you over and he took the place of the topper. He skillfully thrusted into your wet cunt just like old times and ground his pubic bone into your clit for extra pleasure on your end. You held hands and Harry lent down to leave subtle hickies to your skin. Subtle so your kids wouldn't question the marks on their mothers neck.
A few minutes before your orgasms Harry broke down crying. You worried he was hurt for a second only to have him explain that he's crying happy tears. Happy tears that steam from being so happy to have you like this again. He thought he was gonna be broken forever. Even when he had erectile dysfunction though, he still had these feelings of missing being intimate with you. He loves you so much and your sex is so special to him.
After you calmed him down enough, Harry was able to concentrate at his task at hand. The task of helping you both achieve orgasms. And within another minute you came together. Both letting out breathy moans that you didn't have to conceal, beings you had the house to yourselves. Holding each other close and realizing just how much you missed having his naked body pressed to yours.
Once you were finished, Harry helped you walk to the bathroom where you went to pee and he helped to clean you up. Then removing the soaked towels filled with bodily fluids, you crawled into the sheets together and fell asleep holding each others naked body. You choose to sleep naked because you both just really missed his skin on yours and normally when your kids are home you don't have the privilege of sleeping without clothes on. You know, in case of an emergency throughout the night with one of them.
You both slept like babies the entire night and when you woke up, you woke up to Harry's face between your legs, eating his once favorite meal that he just got the cravings for again.
(PLEASE REBLOG BECAUSE WRITING IS NOT EASY AND ITS FREE SO JUST DO IT)
(no more tags are allowed because i've hit my number limit. sorry : ( )
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kristannafever · 2 months
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Second Chances
Kristanna Modern AU Rated: Explicit (See tags) WC: 3163
Summary: It's been eight months since Anna's ex broke up with her in a brutal way. Her concerned sister sets her up on a date, and when she meets Kristoff, it does not go well. Afterward, upon getting an earful from Elsa, Anna realizes her mistake and goes about making things right. What happens between them afterward gives them each a second chance at love and the life they both want to have.
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“Anna, I am breaking up with you.”
Anna nearly choked on the sip of coffee she had just taken.  She stared at her boyfriend with wide eyes, not sure what she had just heard.  “What?”
“It’s over.”
Panic began to well in the pit of her stomach.  Her hands started to shake as she set the coffee mug back down on the table.  “What do you mean?”
He heaved a dramatic sigh.  “You heard me.  We’re done.”
“Where is this coming from,” she pleaded, getting up and walking over to where he was standing in the kitchen.   He’d just gotten back from his run.  When he left the house, it was as if nothing was any different.  And now he was telling her that they were done?
He rolled his eyes.  “Oh come on, Anna.  We haven’t had sex in weeks.  And when we do, you’re so…” he moved his hands around like he was fishing for the word, “…uninspired.   I mean, you don’t even give good blow jobs.”
Tears welled up in her eyes.   She had thought the problems they were facing were just a bit of a slump.  Just the day before she’d gone out and bought some sexy lingerie to surprise him with after the romantic dinner they had planned for that weekend.   Was that not happening now?
“Oh, and just so you know,” he said casually as he turned away, “I’ve started seeing other women.  So I can get… you know… taken care of.   You don’t even know how to kiss properly.”
Anna felt sick to her stomach, watching helplessly after him as he walked towards their bedroom to take a shower.  Despite having said some mean things to her from time to time, what he had just said was downright cruel, and she felt ashamed of herself.  She felt stupid and pathetic. 
Wiping her eyes, she went back to the table and sat down slowly, staring into her morning coffee that she’d actually been enjoying only a moment ago, trying to figure out in her mind what had just happened.  The long and short of it?  She didn’t please him and he’d been seeing other women. 
How had she not known this?  She had thought everything was just… normal.   He had never been a very enthusiastic lover, and he always met his end while Anna had to often take care of herself, and now she had to wonder if it was because she was just that bad at pleasing a man?
He'd been her first serious boyfriend.  Her first real love.  The first guy she’d ever moved out with.  And now all that was coming crashing down around her.   Three years of her life, gone, just like that.
Anna buried her head into her hands and sobbed.
~   ~   ~   ~   ~
“This is a nice place, Anna.”
Anna didn’t respond, she just let her sister in without a word.  The apartment had been his, of course she had to move out when he dumped her. 
Her sister turned around at Anna’s silence.  “You know I hate that man for what he did to you.”
“I know,” Anna said through a sigh.  “I hate him too.”  She told Elsa that he had cheated on her but she did not tell her sister the awful things that her ex had said to her.  And they hadn’t ended in the kitchen that day.  She had begged and pleaded with him for hours afterwards and was met with yet more harsh comments on what an awful woman she was.
Anna led them into the living room and poured them each a glass of red wine from the bottle that was sitting on the coffee table.   She watched her sister as her eyes went around, taking in the small apartment before settling onto her gaze.      
“So, have you been on any dates?”
“Elsa…” Anna sighed with frustration.  “Why won’t you drop it?”
“Anna, it’s been what?  Eight months?  You need to move on.”
Anna was silent and looked down into her wine.  She knew she needed to move on, but how could she do that?  Apparently, she had nothing to offer a man.  What possible hope did she have of making something work.
Elsa set her wine glass down on the table and turned towards her on the couch.  “I’m so sorry I haven’t been able to get out here sooner.  Work has been incredibly demanding, only now that I see you, I feel like that is a pathetic excuse.”
She frowned.  Did she really look that bad?  “It’s okay, Elsa.  I know how important your job is.  And you still call me almost every night.”
“I do, which is probably why you’re tired of telling me you need to get back out there.  You have to see that it’s time to live your life again, don’t you?”
Anna did know that.  And she wanted to, desperately.  But what man would want her?  She’d been hit on a few times only to brush the guy off knowing that she would end up disappointing him in the end.   If she was honest with herself, she didn’t think she’d be able to stomach going through that again.
“Listen, Anna.  I have a friend who’s fairly new to our firm who happens to have moved from here.  She has a brother, and she says-”
Anna’s eyes went wide.  “No way, Elsa.  I am absolutely not about to be set up right now.”
“Please, Anna.”  Elsa reached out and grabbed her free hand.  “For me?   Please?  You can’t be afraid to start dating again.”
She pulled her hand away from her sisters and set the wine down on the coffee table as she got up.  “No.  Absolutely not.”
Elsa followed her as she walked into the kitchen.  “Give me one good reason why you won’t?” her sister demanded. 
Anna pursed her lips.  She would never breathe a word of what her ex had said to her to another living soul, and that was giving her little option for an excuse.   “I… don’t want to.”
Her sister put her hands on her hips.  “It’s just one date.  Who knows, maybe you’ll get lucky.  Maybe what you need is a night of hot sex to get back on the horse.”
Her face lit up with heat.  “What the fuck, Elsa?  I do not need to hear that coming from my sister.”  Not only that, she did not need a reminder of how awful she was in bed.  It was a constant source of shame that hung over her head.
Elsa gave her a gentle smile.  “Sorry.  I was just trying to make a point.  You have to stop keeping yourself from things that make you happy.  You haven’t even gone to the gym or hung out with your friends since you left your ex.”
“He dumped me, but yeah, I know I haven’t.”
“You need to start living again.”
Anna heaved a deep sigh.  Perhaps it was time.  She’d certainly seen plenty of men who she thought were attractive.  Enough that she’d pleasured herself to the thoughts of being with a man again.  That at least she knew she wasn’t bad at.  In fact, she was practically an expert at getting herself off now. 
“Can I tell my friend yes?”
Anna looked to her sister’s pleading eyes.  “Fine.  One date.”
~   ~   ~   ~   ~
The bar was packed, making it hard for Anna to pick out the man that she was supposed to meet.  She’d been given a general description.  Tall guy, big build, blond…  Anna had formed many mental pictures in her mind of what he might actually look like.
She was told that he’d be somewhere in the bar waiting for her, and every blond Anna looked at seemed to already be on a date or clearly out with a group of friends.  The guy Anna was looking for was supposed to be alone.
She muscled her way to the bar where groups of people were gathered around the stools and talking, waiting on drinks.  Then she spotted a blond man sitting at the end, surrounded by women.  The guy was absolutely huge; his t-shirt stretched tight over his biceps and chest.  And he was gorgeous.  His rugged handsomeness was undeniable.  That was why there were women all over him.
Thinking that couldn’t be her date, Anna went to turn away, when his eyes caught hers and widened with something like recognition.
“Hey, are you Anna?” he called to her over the music and loud conversations
She nodded, not wanting to shout back to him, and he got up from his stool and approached her.  Every single woman he was surrounded by watched all of his movements with lusty interest.
His imposing height loomed over her. “I’m Kristoff,” he said, sticking out his hand.
“Nice to meet you,” Anna responded, shaking it and thinking it wasn’t nice at all.  Not after he’d been hanging out with all those stunning women while waiting for her to show up for their date.  What the hell?  Who does that?
“They’re super busy and wouldn’t let me grab a table until you showed up,” he said.
He already sounded bored.  What the hell had Anna gotten herself into.  “Okay.”
Kristoff shrugged and took off to find a table.  Anna followed, kind of hoping they wouldn’t find one.  The guy was clearly someone who could get whoever he wanted and probably often did. 
Towards the back of the bar near the bathrooms, he spied an open table and made a b-line to it.  Anna sat on the stool across from him and put her purse on the edge of the high table.
He smiled.  “It’s quieter over here too.”
There was nothing but cool confidence behind that smile and Anna squirmed again thinking of how many gorgeous women had been salivating over him moments before.  “You sure didn’t waste your time talking to the other ladies, I see.”
He frowned.  “They were talking to me.  I wasn’t talking to them.”
Anna rolled her eyes.  “Sure.  A guy like you must just hate it when women hang all over him.”
His unhappy face turned into a scowl.  “What are you saying?”
“Look, I agreed to go on this date, but not with a player, okay?”
Kristoff became emotionless.  “Have me pegged, do you?” he asked evenly.
Anna could only shrug.  “It’s not that hard to figure out.  The reason a guy who looks like you is single, is that he wants to stay single.”
He stared at her, expression impossible to read.
“Lets just save us both time.  I refuse to be a conquest, so you can just go back to all those ladies at the bar who can barely keep it in their pants.”  Anna got up, keeping her eyes off his unreadable face, feeling relieved.  She didn’t even want to go on this date in the first place.  She was almost glad that this guy, as hot as he was, wasn’t going to work out.
Anna spared him a glance as she turned away and was a little shocked to see profound sadness in his eyes.  It was almost enough for her to turn back around and say something. 
Almost. 
~   ~   ~   ~   ~
Anna looked at her ringing phone.  It was Elsa.  She let out a long sigh and answered.  “Hello?”
“What the fuck, Anna?  Why the hell did you brush off that date last night?”
She groaned inwardly.  This was not a conversation she wanted to have.  “He wasn’t my type.”
“Bullshit!  My friend talked to her brother and he told her what you said to him.  That was pretty awful, Anna.”
She frowned.  Had it been?  She was only speaking the truth.  “Well… you didn’t tell me the guy was a total player.”
Elsa huffed with frustration.  “He’s not!  He hasn’t been on a date in a year!”
“Elsa, he had women, and I mean gorgeous women, all over him when I arrived at the bar.”
“And he was what?  Flirting with them?”
Anna thought back to the scene at the bar.  One of the women had her hand on his arm and was talking his ear off, another one giving him fuck me eyes from his other side, two behind him waiting for their turn, and he was… sitting there.  He was staring at something.  Or was it nothing.  Then he’d looked over and his eyes had widened… they kind of looked a little… well at the time it looked like recognition but thinking back, they seemed a little more… relieved?
Anna gasped.  “Oh no, what have I done?”
Her sister sighed.  “Anna, you might need to talk to someone.  I don’t know what Hans did to you, but it was something.   I have doubts that he was never abusive to you even though you assured me that he never was.”
“He said some mean things, Elsa.  That’s all.”  Anna would give her that much, no more.  Not ever.  No one would ever know of her humiliation.
There was silence on the other end of the line for a beat.  “So maybe you said some things you didn’t mean to a nice guy because you are still so scared of putting yourself out there?”
Anna’s stomach rolled with unease to think about the hurtful way she’d brushed Kristoff off.  “Yeah.  I guess I am.”
“Well, at least you can recognise that.”
“Elsa, I feel terrible.  Is there any way I can get his number?  To apologise?”
“Well…I can ask my friend, although I have to warn you, she was pretty pissed that you treated her brother that way.”
“Please try, Elsa.  I feel awful and I need to tell him that I am sorry.”
“Alright.  I’ll call you back in five, okay?”
“Okay.”  Anna hung up the phone and rung it in her hands.  She could not believe she’d been so mean to someone and tears sprung in her eyes.  It made her feel terrible to think she’d said something hurtful to someone.  It reminded her of what her ex had said to her, and that Kristoff guy did not deserve that, even if he was a player.
Her phone rang in her hands and startled her to the point she almost threw it across the room.  “Hello?”
“Okay, I got the number.”
“Oh, thank you, Elsa.  Thank you so much.”  She sniffed.  “And tell your friend-”
“Anna, are you crying?”
She nodded and started to sob.  “I feel so bad, Elsa.  I was so mean to that poor man.  Please tell your friend to tell her brother that I am so sorry and that he can expect me to contact him to say so that I can apologize and-”
“Anna… Anna!”
She sniffed and reigned in her emotions.  This was insane.  She needed to get a grip on herself.  For all those months she carried all that hurt when her ex broke up with her and it was all starting to come out after treating someone else poorly.  It was becoming a little clearer to her that there were some issues she was going to have to deal with, and soon.
“Anna?”
Sniff.  “Yeah?”
“You need to stop beating yourself up about this, okay?”
“What if he doesn’t accept my apology?” Anna asked, wiping her damp cheeks. 
“Well, then I guess you just have to live with it.”
She shoulders slumped, suddenly exhausted.  “Yeah.  I guess I made the bed I have to lie in it.”
Her sister was silent on the other end for a moment.  “Whatever happens, Anna… it’ll be okay.  Everything will be okay.  You’ll have plenty of other chances.”
Anna nodded to herself, steeling her emotions for the text she was about to send.  “I know.  Thank you, Elsa.”
*****
Kristoff looked at the text from the number that he did not know, and set the phone down in contemplation.
He knew it was coming.  His sister had called him and given him the heads up she’d passed his number along to the woman who was so rude to him last night.  To say he was conflicted was an understatement. 
He hadn’t been hurt like that in a while.  Which was weird because he didn’t know this woman.  It was just that she passed him off so easily that it made him second guess himself a bit.  In retrospect, he should have been ruder to the women vying for his attention at the bar.  Why couldn’t this Anna understand that he had absolutely zero interest in them.  Instead, she’d taken one look at him and decided he was one of those pigs that used women as conquests.  And that fucking hurt.
That was why he’d agreed to be set up.  Trying to meet someone on line or even in a club brought out all the wrong kinds of women for him.  He had yet to meet someone that was looking for something serious, not just some fun fling or one night stand. 
He sighed, and read the message again.
Hi Kristoff, this is Anna, the woman who was rude to you last night and who you wish you probably never met.  I need to say that I am sorry for how I acted and what I said to you.  Clearly! I have issues to deal with.  I would hope you have it in your heart to meet me quickly so that I may apologize in person.  If you wish to never talk to me again though, I completely understand.  If I don’t hear back from you in a couple of days, I will assume I have my answer and delete your number.   I am sorry.
It read like an email, and quite frankly a little bit of a cry for help.  He certainly had his own issues, and he could not deny that her acknowledging her own had softened his attitude towards how she had treated him.  It wasn’t like he was exactly innocent of never behaving poorly when he was dealing with things.  When his sister had let him know to expect her to contact him, he just shrugged and assumed he’d delete the message and move on.  Only having read it and its sincerity…
He started typing.
Hi Anna.  Thank you for reaching out.  Please don’t be too hard on yourself.  If you would like to talk, we could meet for a coffee?
He read it three times and hit send before he changed his mind.  He’d just set his phone down when it dinged.
He chuckled.  “That was fast.”
Thank you so much Kristoff!  Would tomorrow work?  I could meet you at 11 at that coffee shop that’s just on the corner of 10th and Elm?
He typed back;
Sure.  See you then
Anna immediately hearted his message and he set his phone down.  He’d been watching the game on TV and he turned his attention back to it, only in the back of his mind he had other thoughts about how seeing this woman again was going to go.
---
Next Chapter
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yesterdayiwrote · 25 days
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I answered an ask the other day where I said I felt like there were so many overlooked Galex fics because rec lists tend to have a bit of a recency bias, and then I realised, one way to rectify this was to just... do a rec list of my favourite older Galex fics so... this is that?
Sugar High by Animalceramics
An impromptu road trip (with Jaffa Cakes), where the banter is covertly sweet and they re-examine an old friendship
One of the first fics that threw me head first into Galex. The characterisation is just *chefs kiss* and the entire dynamic between them... perfection
you and me until the end of time by alltimecharlo
The one where George has a four-year-old daughter and Alex is her preschool teacher.
Tooth rotting fluff. Everytime I think about writing Galex with kids my brain goes back to this and I end up not bothering because this is as good and as cute as it gets...
Violet skies by monzarchive
For now, it’s all about celebrations but George doesn’t think it could get better than this, his dream and the three people in the world he wants to share every moment of it with.
A different type of parenting fic, but equally as cute and fluffy.
The Soft Bois Anthology by AceEvans
In an infinite number of universes, there are an infinite number of moments. In every universe though, no matter how different the story, for George all roads lead to Alex
Not 1 fic, but 8 fics in one. A great variety of AUs, each as cute and as tender as the one before. Features an exquisite Royal AU, a great Teacher AU and a gorgeous cricket AU, which is not a sentence I ever thought I'd type...
Sad songs & Too much gin by fox_this_lap
Alex is done with Saturday nights. He doesn’t want to sing sad songs and drink too much gin anymore. No matter how dry it is, he still finds tears to shed.
Don't want to give any spoilers but just a sweet yet angsty ride with a happy ending!
Bonus rec because its Galex but a heavy side order of Lando...
Cyanotypes
And why do George and Alex have to be like that around each other all the time? It’s highly unpleasant and inconvenient how it makes Lando think when he wouldn’t want to.
Voyeur Lando fic, but it's Galex and it's hot and it's still worth your time!
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mayxo-hxh · 5 days
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Hisoka the man that would get his limbs decapitated with a straight face but would fall to his knees when the menstrual cramps hit him.
Illumi sees him lose a leg and laugh about it but the moment a single cramp hits he finds him on the floor in the dead family guy meme pose. Hiso on his period is so grumpy about life Illu gotta take care of him and give him a lot of love.........
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slut4thebroken · 1 year
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Working on my Arkham knight x reader fic and trying not to cry rn :,)) /gen if I think too hard about what happened to him in Arkham verse I will cry so idk why tf I decided to put it into words. Anyway jason x reader angst, fluff, and smut fic coming soon😭
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sorcerous-caress · 6 months
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It’s possible to ruin a fictional man’s pussy AND do an intellectual deep dive into his character trauma. Words I tell myself as I struggle to write my smut before any character exploration.
Writing block is hell
-Githzerai anon
Why not just write the characters exploration before the smut? There are no rules man, it's your story.
If i struggle to write smut in a fic, then I just remove the smut. Even the most depraved of porns can have the most beautifully written character moments and exploration.
The drider Minthara fic that started out of an oviposition kink turned into one of my most emotionally invested and heavey world building fics. The smut scene was the least of my focus. I was more interested in describing the sussur tree and the documented history of the world.
It sounds silly but genuinely just write what's true to yourself and heart at the moment, even if it spirals off rails. I barel experience writing blocks now because I stopped applying the writing rules and structures to my work.
Kids never experience art block when they're happily colouring outside the lines, we are no different my dude.
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bonewreath · 4 months
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writing my next full length fic if u even care… it should be posted in the next two-ish days :)) <3
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midnightcaptions · 7 months
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Am I still allowed to ship my childhood ships as an adult I don't know :'((((
oh, the dilemma of morals being imposed on silly fictional nonsense
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chuuyrr · 2 months
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I HAVE SO MANY IDEAS FOR A CHUUYA FIC.. and even a dazai fic. taylor swift needs to release ttpd and rep tv asap to keep my ideas running-
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luvrsbian · 1 year
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sneak peek at a thing for eddie i got coming soon (not tcu)
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gusbuses · 2 months
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I hate my brain cause it's just...so dumb about writing lmao. Like not everything needs a sex scene you idiot stop being horny
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headfullofpresley · 1 year
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i want... vampire!elvis requests. :(((
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heckalecki · 1 year
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absolutely no one at all: hey can you make this story about steve having a tug the most heart wrenchingly tragic fic ever
me: ye s
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